You know, it's rather interesting to me that Taylor Swift's parasocial relationship with her fans is honestly more akin to a YouTuber than a writer's. When I scroll through her tag on tumblr/Twitter, it's far more regarding the connection to her personal life/relationship developments than the actual metaphors/fictional story she might be telling. Everything comes back to how her songs reflect back on her relationships with Joe/Matty/Travis/Jake/insert ex-boyfriend here. And what fascinates me about it is that even though she complains about it, she leans into that very perception because it strengthens the parasocial bond.
The marketing for TTPD so clearly being about Joe Alwyn and the songs to Matty Healy. The marketing/video for Red TV so CLEARLY being about Jake Gyllenhaal, with so many of the new lines in All Too Well specifically being digs at him (I'll get older but your lovers stay my age, casting an actor that looks like him for the video, specific lines in I Bet You Think About Me). The fact that songs like Getaway Car and Bejeweled and Gorgeous and London Boy and Lavender Haze being picked apart at time of release and long after for signs of relationships crumbling. The way she uses surprise songs in relation to her relationship development with Joe/Matty/Travis. The damn TTPD "stages of grief" playlists where she deliberately undid/changed the meanings of old songs just to keep her audience speculating on her love life.
It's not sexist to point out that her wielding her love life is a marketing tool and that the strongest connection to her audience isn't the strength of her writing/the composition of her music- it's her deliberate crafting of a connection between her music and her personal life, leaving the audience invested in her music as an extension of Taylor the Person/Girlfriend rather than Taylor the Artist.
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Also idk what parent needs to hear this but with the curriculum changing to reflect bigotry, you'll have to pickup the slack at home.
Not knowing your history and awful education leads to entire countries of people that dont know what communism actually is, never learned about organized workers movements (despite capitalism being the system), and can't recognize fascism when it's staring them in the face.
It's not a coincidence bigots are densely populated in areas with awful education systems. And it's not a coincidence they don't even see it as bigotry.
My kid is 9. She knows about police brutality, classism, and racism and why we fight it. She had to. She's brown kid, poor, and ADHD; naive by nature for the moment and I don't want her being taken advantage of or exploited. It's why she knows about boundaries, saying "no", and listening to herself.
This year during PRIDE she'll learn about stonewall and why we're still fighting for that too. She's old enough to tag along and participate with more understanding so she will. She's learned about bodily autonomy and women's rights as well. And she's learned about having a healthy relationship with nature; to respect the critters, plants, water, and climate.
Protest and fighting and standing up for yourself and your rights and being a good ally are all family values in my house. And if the school won't teach that to her then it's on me, just like it's on all of us.
And no, she doesn't know or understand enough to have a whole debate but she's 9. There's still so much time to teach her more. But she understands the basics and for kids, it really doesn't need to be more complicated than that because she's just interacting with other kids.
I taught her about police & homophobia in 2020 as soon as I got her back from her homophobic dad. She was 6.
It was as easy as "But I'm a gay people too & when you say theyre gross that hurts my feelings. Do you have to think what your dad thinks?"
Giving her the freedom to make that choice herself, to disagree, and grow out of it and end that association with "gross" was the best thing I could've done for her. Cuz guess who told me she might like boys and girls 3 years later?
Those many tiny talks over time could've saved her from decades of shame induced trauma.
Our kids deserve everything. And they deserve better. We must teach them that and we need to teach them to fight for it. Teach them what to fight against.
They aren't too young. Give them more credit. "Think of the children" by educating yours.
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Matt bringing up the idea of Dorian having received the backlogged messages from Orym is insane to me because like. what an array of messages to receive all in a row. Like, let's game it out:
1. "Dorian? Can you hear me? What's the sky look like where you are? Tell me you're okay." All the retroactive fear and horror and sitting with the inability to respond. Awful. Can't feel great. Implication that wherever Orym was, there was a serious threat to both his life and people writ large considering he's asking Dorian if he's okay.
2, "Dorian. Still alive. By the skin of our teeth. Want to talk more. You know where Dariax is?" Easily the least concerning message, and yet it ALSO implies a near-death experience. Crazy pivot there. "yeah we nearly died, but, hey, do you know where Dariax is at?" Absolutely no info on why Orym would be asking after Dariax of all people.
3. "Dorian. We're alive. Been to the moon. Going back. Find the Tempest. If I don't get the chance again........I've really missed you." The repetition of "we're alive"? Not a good sign! "If I don't get a chance again"? Really not a good sign! He's been to the MOON? Re: Dorian's conversation with Keyleth, we know he thought this was a code word for something and not literally the moon in the fucking sky, but regardless, there is mounting desperation happening here, and the Damocles' sword of friends dying suddenly seems a lot like it's about to drop.
If I got those three messages all in a row when sending came back online, I too would have started booking my ass toward Keyleth immediately, because clearly something awful and massive is going on out there involving my friends.
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I’ve mentioned this elsewhere but it feels relevant again in light of the most recent episode. Something that’s really fascinating to me about Orym’s grief in comparison to the rest of the hells’ grief is that his is the youngest/most fresh and because of that tends to be the most volatile when it is triggered (aside from FCG, who was two and obviously The Most volatile when triggered.)
As in: prior to the attack on Zephrah, Orym was leading a normal, happy, casual life! with family who loved him and still do! Grief was something that was inflicted upon him via Ludinus’ machinations, whereas with characters like Imogen or Ashton, grief has been the background tapestry of their entire lives. And I think that shows in how the rest of them are largely able to, if not see past completely (Imogen/Laudna/Chetney) then at least temper/direct their vitriol or grief (Ashton/Fearne/Chetney again) to where it is most effective. (There is a glaring reason, for example, that Imogen scolded Orym for the way he reacted to Liliana and not Ashton. Because Ashton’s anger was directed in a way that was ultimately protective of Imogen—most effective—and Orym’s was founded solely in his personal grief.)
He wants Imogen to have her mom and he wants Lilliana to be salvageable for Imogen because he loves Imogen. But his love for the people in his present actively and consistently tend to conflict with the love he has for the people in his past. They are in a constant battle and Orym—he cannot fathom losing either of them.
(Or, to that point, recognize that allowing empathy to take root in him for the enemy isn't losing one of them.)
It is deeply poignant, then, that Orym’s grief is symbolized by both a sword and shield. It is something he wields as a blade when he feels his philosophy being threatened by certain conversational threads (as he believes it is one of the only things he has left of Will and Derrig, and is therefore desperately clinging onto with both bloody hands even if it makes him, occasionally, a hypocrite), but also something he can use in defense of the people he presently loves—if that provocative, blade-grief side of him does not push them—or himself—away first.
(it won’t—he is as loved by the hells as he loves them. he just needs to—as laudna so beautifully said—say and hear it more often.)
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The Barbie movie hits you in waves
A lot of us have been that girl who comes to hate Barbie, and like America there comes a point where you see the faults but love the idea of Barbie and what she can be but also despair because no it's not that easy its a dream Barbieland is a dreamland and is it not enough to just be nothing more than ordinary because sometimes thats enough.
But sometimes it isn't. Sometimes that isn't enough and the world is set up to hold you back and Barbieland is a dreamland like you childhood but as soon as you hit adulthood that dreamland falls apart and it hurts like hell. Change hurts like hell and its devestating fighting for what is right and the Kens deserve better just like women deserve better and that happens slowly and that is frustrating and its not a happy ending but its not a sad ending because life isn't fully sad or happy and it doesn't end because there will always be another little girl
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