#this doesn't line up perfectly. what can i say i am lazy

[bobbinalong]

i've been meaning to do this with this drawing.

[miasmaghoul]

Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

Rating: E

Pairing: Sunshine/Aurora

Contains: transfem Sunshine, stoned ghoulettes, banter, snuggling (gone sexual), something of a first time, new discoveries and these two just having a real good day together.

HAPPY FEMSLASH FEBRUARY Y'ALL I HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG THIS IS BUT WHO CARES BECAUSE WE CAN ALWAYS USE MORE WOMEN!!

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"You're so fuckin' pretty," Sunshine slurs, a stoned grin plastered across her freckled face. "You know that?"

Aurora chirps, pleased, raking perfectly manicured nails over the ghoulette's scalp. She's on her stomach between Aurora's legs, arms around her waist, tail curled around Aurora's ankle. Those nails scritch at a spot by her horn and Sunshine purrs with it, nuzzling Aurora's belly through the soft yellow cotton of her sundress. They've been here for hours now; what started as a self-care day had devolved into lazy snuggles and endless snacking once Sunshine revealed her secret stash of edibles. Not that either of them were complaining.

"Yeah?" Aurora giggles, twirling a russet curl around a slender finger. Sunshine nods against her stomach, rumples the fabric under her cheek. "Then why'd it take you so long to get me in your bed, huh?"

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Read the rest below the cut!

Sunshine shoves herself up just enough to look the little ghoulette in the eye, delighted at how heavy and distant they look. Silver-green irises shrunk to thin rings by her blown pupils, eyeshadow glittering in the rosy light of the setting sun. It's the same shade of cotton candy blue as her hair, gentle waves cascading over her shoulders. Her cheeks sit flushed and full, a dopey smile stuck on her perfectly pouty lips.

Pretty doesn't even begin to cover it.

"Whaddaya mean 'so long'?" She reaches up and taps the tip of Aurora's upturned nose. "You've only been here for like a week!"

"Um, excuse you - I've been here for 23 days," Aurora corrects, nipping after Sunshine's outstretched finger. "Thought I was gonna die of old age waitin' to get here."

"Pfft, drama queen." Sunshine gives her a wink, scooting up until they're chest to chest. "You're s'bad as Rain."

"Am not!"

She says it with an indignant pout, that lovely lower lip stuck out in deliberate biting distance. And, well, how could Sunshine resist?

"Sure y'are," she lilts, kissing her cheek. "Actin' like I've been ignoring you," another kiss, to her jaw, "when we both know," one more kiss for good measure, to her chin, "that you've been getting plenty of attention."

She takes Aurora's lip between her fangs, gives it a playful tug, and the little ghoulette's eyes sparkle. She can't keep her pout in place, mouth curling at the corners when Sunshine pulls back to give her a wink.

"Okay but not from you," she trills, looping her arms around Sunshine's neck. "A girl can only handle so much making out and over-the-clothes stuff, y’know."

"Are you callin' me boring?" Sunshine feigns hurt, makes her eyes go all watery and sad. Aurora pays it no mind, offers up a one-shouldered shrug even as her tail sneaks its way around Sunshine's thigh. "You wound me, Roro," she sighs, flopping with all her weight onto the smaller ghoulette's chest, forcing out an oof. "I thought you liked dry humping!"

"Not as much as you do," Aurora teases, and well, Sunshine's pretty sure no one likes dry humping as much as she does. Hell, just the thought has her cock going all tingly. "Besides," Aurora scratches at the space between her shoulderblades and Sunshine purrs again. "How'm I s'posed to not want more when I hear the way you make Lus scream?"

Oh now that makes her tingle. Sunshine shifts, drags her nose down the slender line of Aurora's neck. She sighs, tilts her head to give Sunshine more access, a move the ghoulette rewards with a nibble to Aurora's earlobe.

"You been listenin' in, little bird?"

"Didn't mean to," Aurora admits, not a hint of shame in her voice. "But she leaves her windows open 'n I'm right next door." Sunshine drags her fangs over Aurora's pulse point and the little ghoulette huffs out a soft oh. "Can't blame me for bein' curious."

She certainly can't. Sunshine still remembers her own early days, when she would perch on windowsills and bits of the roof that let her peek, let her listen. Let her spy on Dew riding Aether like a stallion, Rain getting Mountain his knees, Cirrus tying Cumulus up in pretty blue ropes and Swiss doing...well, everyone. She still thinks about those days sometimes, most often on the rare occasion she sleeps alone.

Which raises a very important question.

"Tell me somethin', Roro," she murmurs into the soft skin of her throat. Kissing a slow path over her collarbone, fingers teasing at the strap of her dress. Aurora makes a questioning sound, and Sunshine decides she needs to see her face when she answers. Aurora's cheeks have gone pinker than ever, bottom lip caught between her own fangs. "You ever touch yourself when you listen to us?"

Aurora doesn't hesitate, not even for a moment. She nods with enthusiasm, eyes going wider and her parted thighs falling even further apart. Sunshine grins, delighted, rolling her hips against the mattress in the most obvious way possible. Aurora makes the sweetest little gurgling sound.

"Good," Sunshine breathes, warm against soft skin. She plants both hands on the mattress when Aurora's hands slide back into her curls, dragging her lips over the pale plane of Aurora's chest, until she hits the top of her dress. "You ever imagine what I'm doin' to make Lussy sing like that while you play?"

"Yeah," Aurora whispers, hooking her ankles around the backs of Sunshine's legs. "Every fuckin' time, Sunny, can't help it."

Sunshine believes her, without question, but Aurora sounds far too pretty for her to stop now. She readjusts, wriggles one arm under that slight body to splay her hand over Aurora's spine. Her other hand slips down to hold her waist, thumb brushing the underside of her breast through her dress.

"Then how 'bout you tell me what you think I do," Sunshine kisses the center of her chest, inhales the scent of fabric softener and fruity perfume, "tell me what you do to yourself," she drags her open mouth over the slight swell of Aurora's chest, "and I'll tell you if you're right."

Sunshine punctuates her words with a kiss to the little ghoulette's nipple, stiff and straining against the fabric, and Aurora hisses.

"Fuck," she says on a slow exhale, "you're such a damn tease."

"S'what I'm good at, baby," Sunshine coos, the hand on her waist gliding up to cup her breast and give the soft mound a squeeze. "Now start talkin'."

Sunshine latches onto her nipple through her dress, and oh must the weed be affecting her because the little ghoulette arches right off the bed with a shocked whine. She's never that sensitive.

This is going to be fun.

"U-um," Aurora stammers, clearing her throat in an effort to regain composure. It sort of works, but Sunshine doesn't stop suckling so it's a pointless effort. "W-well, there's - there's this one noise she makes..." she pauses, sucks air through her teeth when Sunshine rolls her nipple between her fangs. "It's like...like a moan, but chirpy?"

Sunshine hums her understanding and Aurora shivers with the vibration. It's a sound she knows well, one Cumulus doesn't make for anyone but her.

"And, um...when - oh - when she does that, I...I imagine her on top of you."

A good guess, Sunshine thinks, but far from the truth. She gives Aurora a reprieve from her mouth, pulls back to admire the wet spot she's soaked into her dress. The little ghoulette sags in her arms, and Sunshine can already smell the arousal on her. Sweet like candy and twice as addictive. Sunshine throbs against the mattress.

"And what do you do," she croons, taking that nipple between two fingers instead, "when you think about her bouncing on my cock?"

"I use my fingers," she answers, wispy as a springtime breeze. "I...I kneel on my bed, I put two inside," she drags a heavy hand from Sunshine's hair, hold it up and crooks her middle and ring fingers, "and I...I ride 'em."

Oh, what a gorgeous picture that paints. Sunshine can imagine it now - she has yet to see the other ghoulette naked, but it's so easy to picture Aurora panting and writhing, little tits bouncing while she uses her own hand like a toy. Flushed down her chest and grinding her clit against the heel of her hand until she can't take it anymore.

Fuck, Sunshine hopes she can squirt.

"Hot," she says, ever eloquent. She moves to Aurora's other nipple, laves at it until it's as wet as the first. Twin dark spots that make Sunshine's balls ache. "That's a good guess, sweetcheeks," she murmurs, low, "but it's not what gets her to make that noise."

Sunshine gets both hands on her breasts, gives them a nice fondle, and Aurora groans.

"What does?"

Sunshine looks up, prepared to tease farther - she can go for hours, if allowed - but the look on Aurora's face has the words catching in the back of her throat.

She looks gorgeous, glassy eyed with bite-swollen lips and the tip of her tongue poking out between her fangs. She's breathing heavier already, fingers twitching against the back of Sunshine's neck and her tail gradually tightening around her thigh. Barely any stimulation at all, and yet the poor thing looks wrecked.

Sunshine surges up to kiss her, and decides teasing can wait for another day.

Aurora moans, an indulgent, wanton sound that flows into Sunshine's mouth like the sweetest water. Their tongues dance, their fangs click, Sunshine's pretty sure she's drooling down her chin, but it doesn't matter. All that matters is the way Aurora clings to her, the taste of her strawberry lip gloss and the way Aurora's hips roll to find her own. Sunshine reaches down to grip her there, pins the little ghoulette to the bed, and can't help but rut against her thigh.

Aurora's the one to break the kiss, gasping, and Sunshine can see the demand in her eyes before she has a chance to speak.

"Don't worry, little bird," she rasps, nosing at her bangs. "I'm gonna give it to you, I promise."

"You fuckin' better," Aurora spits, and it's so cute that Sunshine has to giggle.

"Don't you wanna know the answer first, Roro?" She tips her head, a cascade of short curls tickling her forehead. Aurora blinks a few times, seeming lost. "What makes Lussy scream," she clarifies, and Aurora's eyes roll.

"Uh huh," she nods, licking already wet lips. "Tell me, please tell me."

"I think it'll be more fun," Sunshine gets a knee under herself, presses her thigh right where Aurora needs it just to hear her choke, "if I show you."

The little ghoulette makes the loveliest keening sound, a warbling thing that makes Sunshine's belly warm, and then she's moving. Slinking down the short length of Aurora's body, kissing down her chest, the slight softness of her stomach, the curve of her hip - Sunshine settles between her legs, presses her face to the crease of her thigh through her dress, and can't wait to finally get underneath it.

"You really are beautiful, y’know," she coos, resting warm palms on Aurora's knees. They slide up her thighs with deceptive slowness, gathering soft fabric and exposing inch after inch of porcelain skin. Rucking the skirt up over her hips, exposing the cutest pair of silky pink panties Sunshine thinks she's ever seen. The not-small wet spot only adds to the experience. "Been dyin' to see how beautiful you are here, too."

Sunshine slides two fingers over the damp fabric, the barest pressure, and Aurora makes that gurgling sound again.

"You're gonna kill me," the little ghoulette complains, mindlessly tweaking those impossibly stiff nipples through still-damp fabric. "Fuck, Sunny, c'mon..."

Sunshine clicks her tongue, chastising, but she doesn't have much room to taunt the other ghoulette for her impatience. Not when she can feel the place where her boxers are starting to stick to her.

"Alright, alright, sheesh," she chuckles, giving Aurora one more rub just because. "But nex' time you're gonna let me have my fun first."

Sunshine nips at her inner thigh, makes her jolt, and then she's pressing her open mouth to that wet spot. Licking at the fabric and groaning at the taste of her, heady and sweet and utterly delicious. She groans, savoring her first taste of the little ghoulette, and hooks two fingers around the gusset. Aurora reaches down and gets a hand in her hair once more, rocks her hips towards Sunshine's face, and the soft growl that escapes her is nothing but hungry.

Sunshine pulls that strip of fabric to the side, exposes her properly, and -

"Oh," she breathes, suddenly dizzy, "isn't this a pretty surprise..."

Aurora's as beautiful here as Sunshine knew she would be, pink and slippery with the lightest dusting of platinum curls just at the apex of her thighs, but all Sunshine can focus on is the sweet little silver barbell threaded through her hood. Each end is decorated with stones that match the blue of her hair, and Sunshine's brain short circuits when she considers the possibility of the little ghoulette having a color for every time she dyes those luscious waves.

"D’you like it?" Aurora lets out an airy giggle while Sunshine drools onto the sheets, hooking one leg around her back. "Swiss n' Cir said you would."

Sunshine traces the piercing with her thumb, gives a slow nod, and feels a blurt of pre soak into her boxers when she taps the lower ball against Aurora's swollen clit and the little ghoulette shakes.

"Baby," she huffs, grinding into the bed, "you have no idea."

Aurora tugs at her hair then, just enough to pull her attention from the shiny thing that's making her throb, and Sunshine can't believe how good she looks from down here.

"Aren't you s'posed t'be teachin' me somethin'?"

Aurora blows her a kiss, and Sunshine hurts.

"Oh, sweet thing," she slurs, fucked up sixteen ways from Sunday, "I'm gonna make you sing like an angel."

"Good," Aurora breathes, palming her tits once more, "'cause I want everyone t'hear me."

Oh, Sunshine hopes she screams.

[the-scooby-gang]

Character assassination and delayed puberty: VelmaHBO mishandling of Fred Jones

As I write the "I watched Velma HBO so you don't have too" reviews for episode 1 and 2, I decided to post this thought process I had regarding Fred's mischaracterization and, specifically, about the choice of giving him delayed puberty.

In the show, Mindy Kaling's self insert (because that ain't Velma in this or in the next life) comes to the conclusion that Fred is such a "spoiled white privileged brat" that his body didn't see the point of growing up at all.

First of all: Fuck that

Second of all: Whose brilliant idea (we all know who, but lets pretend for a second here) was it to turn FRED JONES: cheerleader; net lover; circus enjoyer; himbo friend; golden retriever sunshine boy and "I love my friends and my van so much you guys" into THIS?!?!

Is it because he is white, blond and has blue eyes???? Because it would be easy to make him into a caricature of white supremacy???

Yes. That's exactly why they changed Fred. Because it was easy.

I will go deeper on this in the full review of episode 1 and 2 (god help me) but this whole show is written in the most lazy way possible with jokes that would have fit perfectly in a edgy early 2000s show, where characters become those straw men versions of liberals conservatives IMAGINE exist.

Where people of color complain all the time about white supremacy but don't go deeper into it, its just complaining for the sake of complaining;

Where they bring genuine arguments people make but with zero nuance or though behind them, instead the writers put what THEY imagine it is about and, 99.9% of the time, they attribute it to people being "tOo sEnSiTiVe" and " tRiGgErEd SnOwFlAkEs"

Where people blow things out of proportion and accuse people left and right of being fascists (when they call Fred "Hitler" the background character says "he looks like Hitler. And I'm not just saying that because we call anyone Hitler nowadays") completely disregarding the WHY people in real life are calling out fascist behavior when they see it. Hello rise of fascism happening on the world, how is the INVASION OF CAPITOL IN AMERICA and THE INVASION AND DEPREDATION OF THE PLANALTO IN BRAZIL going for you?!;

This show is Family Guy. I would say it's worse than Family Guy even.

Third of all: Delayed puberty is an Actual Thing That Happens To People. It's something that can happen at random or it can be a genetic disorder shared in the family. It can be a symptom of something way more serious or something benign.

Many people that suffer from delayed puberty suffer from low self esteem because they have to watch their friends grow and develop when the same thing's not happening to them. They may feel like they're never going to catch up.

People are bullied over this, people develop depression.

And now these people are the punch line of this mean spirited joke.

I can even envision a better show where Fred still has delayed puberty, but instead of being the butt of jokes where people keep commenting on the size of the penis of this HIGH SCHOOLER, they treat as the constitutional delay it is. Fred is a late bloomer. It may be caused by a pattern of growth and development in his family, it may be a chronic illnesses he has. Can you imagine Fred with something like asthma or diabetes?

Lets go with that, lets imagine a Fred with diabetes, who is not receiving a proper treatment for said diabetes (maybe because his parents subscribe to that style of parenting where they are more concerned about appearances than the well being of their kid. "No, he has no problem. He is a perfectly healthy Jones."

Or they are the kind that say shit like this: "He doesn't have blurry vision he is just a lazy student, that's an excuse," or "You would stop going so much to the bathroom to piss if you stoped drinking water all the time" or even "I told you to not stay awake all night on those weird net making websites, now you're tired in class. What kind of mother they must think I am..." "But I didn't stay up all night, I swear–" "Don't you lie to me Frederick") and as such the side effects and symptoms are left unchecked.

So the Fred Velma, and we the audience, are introduced too is the heir of this fortune... who can't stay standing because he is constantly tired, has completely given up on trying to apply himself on school because he can't see the fucking board his vision is so blurry, has passed out at least once in gym, drinks water like he lives in a dessert and is so self conscious about his body that even his girlfriend hasn't seen him shirtless even once. The swim team hasn't seen him shirtless even once, so there are these whiplash inducing photos in the year book where is a bunch of guys in speedos nest to this one dude in an early 20th century striped swimming suit.

In episode 1 itself Velma's vision of Fred can start biased, after all from a distance a person that doesn't know Fred personally can chalk his behavior to "rich dramatic boy that knows he doesn't need to put effort into learning since he already has a fortune guaranteed for him after all this, so he is just sleeping and vibing and being dramatic through high school" but as the episode progresses and she gets to know Fred, she notices that the image doesn't fit. Fred, who has such in depth knowledge about physics and mechanics, who clearly loves his girlfriend very much and feels bad about the murder of this girl he considered a friend. The image of "Rich guy that doesn't care" is not fitting.

I want it to be a Velma and Daphne epiphany. About Daphne talking about all these things Fred has told her or that she noticed about him to Velma as they look for clues and it hits Velma as a she connects all together. The tiredness, the pissing, the thirst, the blurry vision.

Daphne may have not seen it because she is too close but with Velma's outside perspective the pieces fall into place.

Now lets imagine that instead of cop lesbian moms, Daphne could have lesbian doctor/nurse moms. They take him to them and they give him what he desperately needed:

"No, dear. You're not lazy, or broken, or an attention seeker, or any other bullshit your parents called you. You have diabetes. Type 1 to be precise."

After Daphne and Velma hug a crying Fred until he has no more tears to give, the series progresses with Fred now treating his diabetes as one of its recurring plot lines.

I want Daphne to have extra insulin in her purse, I want Shaggy to help Fred with his new diet, I want Fred and Velma to go exercising together and have deep conversations about body image and how they deal with it (Fred with his delayed puberty, Velma with her extra weight)

"Mature" and "Adult" content doesn't need to be edgy sex-violence-and-drugs.

It can be simply a story of a high schooler having to deal with diabetes in a country were insulin is expensive as fuck, some parents are more willing to let their kids suffer than offer any kind of help or even admit that there may be a problem in the first place, of dealing with body image and things that are out of your control.

Just a thought.

This is a post by The-Scooby-Gang, thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

[mariyekos]

As Azure Fades Analysis, Part 1

Azure Dragoons: Aging and the Impact of the Eyes

@scrollsfromarebornrealm made an EXCELLENT analysis post about the newest short story from the official FFXIV sidestory website, and in my attempt to respond to it I ended up with something so long it probably won't fit in a single post. So, I decided to split it up before i hit the image/text limit.

And yeah, in case you didn't know there's a new official FFXIV short story out relating to Estinien and Haldrath. Go check it out, because it is AMAZING.

First things first, as is typical of me: I will be discussing both canon and headcanon here. I will do my best to make it very clear when I am discussing something explicitly stated or heavily implied in canon, and when I am discussing headcanon. Some of this will come from the new short story, but I will also make references to the whole game, so get ready for sources galore!

Introductory Sources:

(Above: from the new story)

(Above: from the quest Heart of Ice)

(Above: from the sidequest Thar be Dragons)

Hraesvelgr's Line, and the Lifespan of Elezen

Alright with my sources out of the way, I actually interpreted the new story and Hraesvelgr lines differently! First, when I read Hraesvelgr's line, I took it as him saying that Estinien would be old and unable to effectively fight by age 50, rather than that Estinien would be dead by then.

Elezen live to be 100-120, but Edmont and Charlemald use old face models by age 56 I believe, so it's not like they stay spring chickens forever. I'm taking the fact that Haldrath and Aureniquart have young faces as the devs wanting them to be recognizable, or maybe aging a little more gracefully. It's been 20 years, so I would put them at mid 40s, maaaaybe mid 50s since Estinien and Aymeric are 32 in HW, which means 32 is a perfectly good age to still be fighting. If elezen live to 100-120, then 45-55 could definitely fit for "a brawny man well into his middle years."

In canon, it is heavily implied if not outright confirmed that transformed heretics can live for centuries (see: Thar be Dragons). In my long-established headcanon, Estinien ends up aging slower because of Nidhogg's power. In that HC, Hraesvelgr doesn't necessarily know of the impact that Nidhogg's Eye had on Haldrath, since Hraesvelgr basically peaced out after handing Nidhogg his own Eye. This new story is making me re-evaluate that HC... In Canon, the actual Eyes of Nidhogg are gone at this point, but Estinien spent some time a few days according to Lucia, but it's months/patch time in my HC again possessed by Nidhogg with the Eyes in his flesh, and there's no denying there have been lasting effects. Going purely on canon, Estinien can do the clone thing now, and is a huge powerhouse. The dragons recognize the bit of Nidhogg that resides within him too. Stuff like scales is pure HC that I happily accept but acknowledge isn't canon as far as anything we've seen. But imo that could partly the modelers being lazy since that would require excess effort .

(Above: Estinien making clones, à la Nidstinien. Source, with video)

Haldrath, Estinien, and How They Age

Now, Estinien's lifespan might not be impacted at all by what happened with Nidhogg. But since heretics can live centuries, and we know Estinien has been impacted somewhat...I think it's possible Hraesvelgr's assessment about Estinien being spent by 50 was wrong. Especially if we go with the idea that in his isolation he didn't know what happened to Haldrath beyond just that Haldrath had the Eyes (general had, no knowledge of the merge). Plus, his "spent" assessment came before Estinien ended up melding with the Eyes. If we go with the assumption that Hraesvelgr does know about what the Eye did to Haldrath, it could also be that Hraesvelgr told Estinien he would be old and infirm by 50 because he assumed Estinien would get rid of the Eye before it had any lasting effects on him, like all the other Azure Dragoons. By getting rid of it, he'd get old too.

(Above: from the new story).

Haldrath was still able to slay dragons during his middle years, after all. He collapsed because of Nidhogg's growing influence. Which admittedly could've been better-able to get him because maybe in aging he was growing weaker, but I think you could say it was more prolonged exposure to Nidhogg making him vulnerable than aging-induced-weakness.

(Above: Thordan upon revealing Haldrath in the quest Heavensward)

In the new story, Estinien mentions Haldrath's aging corpse. In the quest Heavensward, Archbishop Thordan VII makes reference to the body's lack of decay. This preservation is why I HC that maybe Estinien would end up aging slower- maybe the aether would be enough to maintain him as he is, just as Haldrath was. Now we didn't take of Haldrath's armor so who knows what lies beneath, but what I find interesting is that his corpse apparently did not change. He most definitely didn't turn into a full-on dragon. He's still an elezen (albeit with an eye in his chest, which is notably smaller than the Eyes bound to Estinien! I really wonder if there is meant to be a lore reason, like the Eyes tunneling deeper into the flesh over time, or if that was just a visual thing to make possessed!Estinien seem creepier). It could be that Haldrath neither decayed nor transformed because Nidhogg's power could only transform living beings, not dead ones. Haldrath's body never rose on its own to return to Nidhogg, after all.

Dragon Eyes and Consciousness/Control

Which brings into question how much consciousness is afforded to the Eyes... Vrtra can operate Varshahn and his true body separately, but given the scene when he freezes as Varshahn while he calls to Azdaja with his true body, maybe Dragons can only instill consciousness in one Eye-containing vessel at once. Haldrath kept both Eyes, even if only one merged to him (and why only one...? just to make sure the story could happen, or maybe because Nidhogg was weakened by the attack and only one could...?). Estinien had both Eyes when possessed too. When Nidhogg speaks through the Eye to Estinien in the lv50 DRG quest, we don't see his true body (with Hraesvelgr's Eye) and whatever that's doing. Maybe Nidhogg can only keep his consciousness in one place/with one Eye (so it's rendered moot when both Eyes are together).

Maybe dragons can only use their Eyes operate living beings (Varshahn is made by alchemists, so he's special). Maybe there was some sort of seal on Haldrath's dead body that kept Nidhogg from making it rise and deliver the other Eye unto him, even after Berteline/the next Azure Dragoon(s) held the Left one. Maybe he just didn't feel like going through the trouble to reclaim it because he could wage his war perfectly well with Hraesvelgr's Eye and wasn't going for extermination/didn't need full power until HW. Maybe the writers just needed an Eye in Haldrath's body and let the reason for Nidhogg not reclaiming it slide to make an awesome story moment.

(Above: comparison of Eye sizes. Also Estinien's Eyes move)

Summary on Aging, HC and Canon

In any case! Back to canon: 1) Transformed heretics can live for centuries. 2) Haldrath's body ceased to age and did not decay after the Eye merged to him. 3) The Eye was able to remain in Haldrath's body for a thousand years and was still functional when it merged to Estinien (it wiggles in the CSs).

HCs from this: maybe Estinien will age slower and be able to maintain his form. Maybe he will gradually be transformed into a dragon or more draconic being over time. Even a drop of dragon's blood- supposedly- is enough to transform an Ishgardian, and Estinien got fully blasted with Dragon Essence upon possession. We even see a middle form during the Nidstinien fight! Nidhogg's shade (dragon form) might just be an aetheric projection rather than flesh. But back to HC, I interpret that as Nidhogg attempting to actually warp flesh, before going to his Shade and then returning to the form that his body- Estinien's body- recognizes best as its own.

...All of this is a really long way to say that I don't think Estinien would necessarily be dead by 50. Well. Unless we take it with the idea that Nidhogg would have taken full control of him, and that the "youthful vigor" he would lose would be his ability to reject Nidhogg's influence before being lost as Haldrath was. For some reason that did not occur to me until this very moment, over an hour into writing this, despite the fact that that was probably what scrollsfromarebornrealm was implying... And/or that scrollsfromarebornrealm just meant that Estinien would probably get himself killed by 50 because yeahhhh, that man did NOT seem to care about himself enough to be safe and survive that long. Especially if aging meant he grew weak and then said weakness had him fall in battle (rather than Nidhogg's corruption straight up killing him by 50. Which is also an intriguing possibility).

"Becoming the Azure Dragoon is a death sentence."

The quote above comes directly from @scrollsfromarebornrealm's post. While I'm not looking at it as dragoons being too old/weak to fight by 50, I do wholeheartedly agree with the idea that (nearly) all Azure Dragoons die young. Partially because of the dangers of their job, partially because of the risk of Nidhogg's influence.

First, Alberic. Alberic retired 20 years ago and he's fine! But two things: 1) Alberic was 24 when he retired (don't feel like taking a picture, but in my Encyclopedia Eorzea it says he's 44, and it's been 20 years). 2) Alberic is a hyur. Haldrath held onto BOTH eyes of Nidhogg for 20 years before he could no longer handle it, and drank of Ratatoskr's aether. Most Azure Dragoons were probably Elezen given the racial distribution of Ishgard. Alberic, a hyur, does not bear elezen/dragon blood (as long as he's purely hyur, which I am assuming he is). In addition, he probably only had the Eye for a handful of years at most, since he was only 24 when he rejected it. It makes sense that he would walk away from Nidhogg with relatively few impacts. He didn't die in battle and he firmly rejected the Eye when it threatened to take control of him. I think retirement for an Azure Dragoon (followed by at least two decades of survival) is EXTREMELY uncommon in Ishgard's history.

(Above: from the new story)

A few things here. I'll start with the point I was trying to make: "While the Eye lent him strength, in harboring Nidhogg's undying malice, it was also slowly corrupting his being. Ere long it would finally consume him..." In other words, the Eye is most definitely a death sentence. It will kill Haldrath eventually. Possessing an Eye long term- at least as a part of one's own flesh, though since it seems possessing it long term binds it to the Azure Dragoon's flesh you could just shorten that to "long term" only- will corrupt the Azure Dragoon to the point of no return. The only options left at that point seem to be Getting Consumed And Becoming Nidhogg's Puppet (Estinien) or Being Killed As To Not Become A Puppet (Haldrath). It was too late to reject the Eye, which is what Alberic did to make his escape.

Back into HC territory, I now want to pick up an old fic of mine about a previous Azure Dragoon basically having to be put down upon being too far gone due to Nidhogg's Corruption. Not to the level that the Eye melded to their flesh as it did Haldrath and Estinien, but mental corruption, and maybe attacks like the one Haldrath has. Ishgard would be wary of another Azure Dragoon being claimed by the Eye not only because they don't want Nidhogg to have a new pawn, but also because they can't afford to lose the second Eye with the first still bound to Haldrath. They also probably wouldn't want news of the Azure Dragoon's corruption leaking to the public, since the Azure Dragoon is supposed to be a hero and that would be Not Good for the Azure Dragoon's image. So maybe Ishgard kills Azure Dragoons who are too far gone (whether they're actually too far or whether the people in power are paranoid about it).

A different HC I'm not sold on but thought of is that the stress of being Azure Dragoon could lead to an early grave. Yes Dragon blood does extend the lives of transformed heretic, but it could be that without the transformation, the stress of it all causes damage to the insides of Azure Dragoons in a way that prematurely ages them and/or just causes them to die young. Alberic at 44 has some white hair. Which 44 year old men can definitely have without anything bad happening, don't get me wrong! But that could be a fun HC interpretation of that.

So yeah. I HC that Azure Dragoons die young as based on 1) them potentially needing to be killed to avoid falling to Nidhogg, 2) their jobs being so dangerous they're killed in battle (and the Eye retrieved) or die from wounds, 3) the stress of the Eye causing irreparable damage that leads them to die young even after relinquishing the Eye. Plus, as @scrollsfromarebornrealm points out, Valeroyant died 2 years after fending off Nidhogg. We don't have many named Azure Dragoons so even one early death is suspect!

Haldrath and the Two Eyes

(Above: from the new story)

Yes, one of these is a repeat of the one above. But I really want to empahsize something in this because my eyes (haha) are SO wide at this. Haldrath refers to an Eye, singular, being what is corrupting him. Not the Eyes plural. And only one of the eyes has fused to his body, which matches what we know. At first I thought that maybe he only had one or something. Yet he tells Berteline that he will "entrust [Nidhogg's] eyes" plural to her.

So this is odd. Haldrath only mentions drawing on a singular Eye, and only a singular Eye has fused to his body. But he entrusts both to Berteline. My thought here is that maybe he stopped drawing on the power of the second one once the first fused to him, unwilling to give up the strength afforded by the first, but wary of drawing on the second lest it fuse to him too. I do wonder if he thought Bertiline would be able to pry Nidhogg's Right Eye from his corpse (in addition to presumably taking the Left Eye from him, which is the one Estinien has), or if when he said he was entrusting the eye to her he meant he was entrusting his dead body (containing the Eye) to her to...keep away from Nidhogg, or something. In the Echo Flashback to Haldrath following the events of The Aery, we can see Haldrath holding both Eyes and then storing them. It's heavily implied (if not outright stated) that Haldrath never met with any of the Knights Twelve again, save Aureniquart on his deathbed, so I assume Haldrath would've also had the Left Eye on him at his death even if only the Right had fused to him.

But yeah. Haldrath says he's been corrupted by One Singular Eye. It could be that the second just isn't mentioned here because it hasn't fused to him, and maybe I'm reading too far into this (see: me going feral over Estinien saying "Then you and Alphinaud threw my eyes off a bridge, and I’ve never known peace since."). Yet he must possess two to entrust both to Bertiline. Interesting.

I do wonder if anyone ever attempted to pry the Eye from Haldrath's body. It is possible they thought he was a Holy Object and didn't want to disturb him so never tried. It's possible that those who knew of him were worried they might also be corrupted if they touched the Eye, so they didn't want to try. It's possible they tried and failed. Who knows. But it seems like the Eye remained undisturbed within Haldrath's ageless corpse until Thordan used Primal Powers to fuel his ascendance to a God-King.

End Note

I honestly don't know what to say anymore other than Wow.

This one short story has blasted my mind open. I'm not sure how many words this giant essay is, but it's been about 3 hours so I think i should stop for now, despite the fact that I've hardly even begun to talk about some of the most intriguing parts of the short story! (See: Estinien being able to see Haldrath's memories and attributing it to Nidhogg, a more in-depth analysis of corruption, being able to hear Nidhogg and him sounding like the wind (hey remember that dragoon helmets are designed to make the sound of the wind going through it seem like a dragon scream, thank you levequest), whatever the hell was in that drink (I think it would be fascinating to explore it being an intentional flashback on the part of the Alchemists, using the blood they took from him...maybe fic worthy hmmmm), the parallels between Haldrath and Estinien losing their burning passion to fight, Aureniquart and the pain of being told to kill your liege-lord plus potential backstory there and some lines about loyalty...needless to say there's a lot more to talk about!)

So for now I am going to stop here. There's a lot to think about. Haldrath did not die in battle as I'd assumed, but due to the Eye's corruption. He entrusted the Eye to a successor, as Nidhogg had already begun to call out to others. He asked to be killed. This has big repercussions.

If you've read this whole thing, thank you! I hope my rambling was somewhat interesting. If you want to discuss anything here, reblog or reply and I would love to talk xD. I don't have every lore piece memorized, and I've definitely forgotten some things, so if I'm missing some crucial information I would be happy to know!!

[treasureplcnet]

do you have any drawing tips? i'm just starting out and your style inspires me to keep going fr!!

HIYA !!! thank you that is so kind of you, i would say to keep drawing with references and do studies!! typically art studies (in like art school lol) are of old masters (da vinci, etc) but doing studies of styles that you like, like trying to copy a certain artist you like, also helps you develop skills !!

for example, lots of people (especially fanartists lol) do studies of artists like leyendecker while making the models their favorite characters/ocs, so it helps to make studies fun. literally look up leyendecker study on tumblr dot com and you will see hundreds.

(gets a bit long and rambly so i've thrown it under the cut :')

style studies can be anything! above was done while watching wolfwalkers, just loose sketches that copied the style as the movie went along. i love the design and style in that film, wanted to incorporate it in my character design work, so i tried it out myself! it let me know the kinds of shapes used in the construction, the way it moves (wrt to animation) and silhouettes. by copying something, you learn how to do it on the way (so the kinds of colors used, what works best with shading, etc) it's like. reverse engineering

even very loosely copying something to identify what you like about the style helps! these were modelled after the way slimsense on ig paints (her work is 2nd + 4th examples below, my attempts at 'paint' 1st and 3rd lol), but doesn't really look like her work. i'm not necessarily trying to make perfect copies. i liked that her paint didn't blend perfectly, was blocky, and the additional lineart over the painting, so i brought that into my own art. i tried to create a painting style that was 'my own' off of lots of trial and error, and seeing what stuck!

also find brushes you like! adobe has a bunch on their page (if you have photoshop, but i know there's some for procreate and other programs) and if you want the adobe brush files, lmk. i will send a drive link to you LOL (sketches of the same characters, using different brushes below. the two i used the most often, one being a solid inker and the other being a paintbrush)

generally doing figure drawing is good too. i've heard advice about art where you can only start breaking the rules after you understand them, and a good grasp on anatomy, proportions, etc is definitely a good place to start! good sites to use for this are line of action for poses, and the morpho books (if you need pdfs of this let me know, though you should be able to find them if you look lol) !

i would also say learn perspective early on. i have no tips for you here i am so sorry. i didn't and now it bites me in the ass, but there has to be a youtube tutorial for this out there that can help you AND me. same goes for color theory. quickly dropping my favorite van gogh quote of all time:

(quote is from a letter to his brother) just everyone needs the fundamentals first. don't worry about a personal style: that just comes naturally as you develop as an artist, and i was certainly inspired by a lot of the things i watched/consumed and artists i admired which absolutely shows in my work i think (manet. western comics. fma. avatar. pjo fanart. there are tells. you know how it is.)

also flip your canvas !!! like see below ... frankly this marcille is so lopsided (her entire face should shift to the left) LOL !! flipping horizontally makes the anatomy mistakes obvious, and shows you you what you need to fix. i should never have posted this as is but sometimes it works for humor and an artist is lazy </3

AND ALWAYS USE REFERENCES WHEN YOU CAN!! i should use more references tbh!!! it helps with posing, getting anatomy correct, etc, and my friends use pinterest a lot, though i tend to just google when i need to LOLLL

also draw what you like. there is genuinely nothing that is better for your art than getting into something REALLY BAD and then non stop drawing it. time + practice will lead to improvement no matter what the subject is!

i hope this was not too much information all at once !!! and some of it is helpful!!! it's a lot of basic improvement tips that i try to practice and use when i can :) so sorry that this got so long!!!!

[i-literally-cant-with-this]

Spread love to fanfic writers! 🤍 Answer these questions about your fanfics then send this to 5 other fanfic writers

Name a fic you loved writing the most.

Name a fic that others loved but you didn't care for as much.

Name a fic you had the most fun writing.

Name a fic that you are the most proud of.

Name a fic that you wish had gotten more recognition.

Name your happiest/saddest/most comedic fics!

Hi Milky & Mack!!! Thank you both for sending this to me! I should NOT be lazy and give you each different answers. But unfortunately, I am feeling very lazy today. <3

A fic that I loved writing the most

‣ It would have to be Hush, Little Baby It's a story about Katsuki getting up with his baby (6 months ish) after she has a bad dream or something. I wrote it in less than 15 minutes and I damn near cried at the end. It was so sweet to me coming from a man like him. And I think my favorite part of it was obviously the last line of it, but the fact that I can totally see him doing that after he's grown up a bit is what brings me the most joy.

A fic others loved but I didn't care for as much

‣ I think I'm my number one fan, tbh 😑. Like, I think stuff I write is ok at the very least and I think I'm not alone in this when I wonder why the fuck some of my stuff doesn't take off more. At least, I kinda hope so. At the beginning of the year I started this stupid thing where I wanted to be more candid about stuff - try to be more open? I guess. So I made up a little series called Clean Dirty Thoughts. Honestly, Mack and Honee were the only ones who even bothered to look at it. And I think Mack did it out of pity lmao (Thank you Mack, ilysm).

Name a fic you had the most fun writing

‣ It wasn't really a "fic" but my @katkitkats (a new moot turned friend I talk with almost everyday) shot me a really fun HC for Kat's ask for Sweet Hanma and I have never been so in love with such an asshole as that moment in time. It's spiraled tremendously since.

Name a fic that you are the most proud of

‣ Talk Dirty To Me is the small small small piece that I feel put me on the tumblr map. It's so short and I'm a little saddened by the fact that I've written things 5x's longer than that and they get like, next to no notes. I guess the people want short fun things to read? Idk. It could totally be me. I'm learning more and more to write for ME and if other people enjoy it that's fantastic. Just kidding. I get excited every single time someone likes my stuff lol.

Name a fic that you wish had gotten more recognition

‣ What do you mean pick only one??? Over Thanksgiving last year I wrote a fic about TAMAKI AMAJIKI that I was so fucking sure was gold. Like I said, I am my number 1 fan. I thought I nailed him perfectly in that. I dunno. Maybe my #'s are all wrong? Maybe I just suck? 😂

Name your happiest/saddest/most comedic fics

‣ The happiest fic ... off the top of my head I think it would be *Say Yes, Or I'll Shoot. It's about Hange. It's 100% an inaccurate portrayal of them. But I thought it was super cute.

‣ The saddest fic ... hmm ... I started a series called Throwing Down the Gauntlet and it's about Katsuki x F.reader and all of their shit. I'm not done with it yet. I've had to step back from it because the motivation to keep going was next to nothing. I do plan on finishing it. Currently sitting at part 7.

‣ The most comedic thing would have to be Wrong Hole. It's just a stupid little thing about some of the guys from AOT. Made me giggle. Made like 3 1/2 other people giggle, too. So my job here is done.

[mud-castle]

Why yes I am continuing this, bc I have more time for this but less time to draw due to lowering the number of projects I'm focusing on but also taking only one less credit hour than the allowed max at school, thanks for asking.

Anyway, onto reading The Hidden Kingdom:

How many dragons are in the Talons of Peace? I got the vibe that they were a super small group from the first book, due to the dragonets only knowing the three guardians and Morrowseer, but dragons being surprised that the Talons actually existed.

I know their main purpose was to raise the DoD, but that does bring to question what everyone who was not a guardian did. They didn't serve as any back up or help when the DoD was captured. Or really do anything as the DoD was running around the continent.

It would've been interesting to expand on what they actually did aside from raising the DoD. Did they run relief operations? Help those displaced or injured by the fighting? Etc.? They had some dragons under cover, what did they do?

I've always wondered. If Nightwings are held in such a high regard of being able to perfectly predict the future and read minds, and the Talons (as well as many others) seem to have faith in the prophecy, why bother with the false dragonets at all?

I'd kinda expect Morrowseer to get offended that they're questioning him to the point of having possible replacements who didn't hatch on the brightest nights. I always thought it was Morrowseer's backup plan, but rereading this, I'm realizing it was Nautilus's plan.

Squid knows what's up.

^^^YESSS GLORY GO OFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

Dragons canonically have tea in WoF, worldbuilding time. Some teas can be made with bone broth, and I'm choosing to assume dragon tea isn't leaf juice so much as bone juice spiced up with some leaves. Since this is only mentioned with Queen Moorhen, it's a Mudwing invention, that might've been adopted by their allies the Skywings, hence why Glory knows what it is.

Hmmm, ya know, it would've been super interesting if the Rainwings actually were the ones behind this in some way but withheld that info from the DoD since they're total strangers.

You could make it work too, a Queendom of reclusive dragons who don't want this terrible war anywhere near their home, so they scare them away. Orr the Queens of the Queendom want to keep their pacifist dragons happy and kill these trespassers in secret to both keep the peace, their own territory, and their way of life safe.

Damn, that's really sad tbh.

I think it says a lot that Glory has had more positive thoughts about FUCKING QUEEN SCARLET than any of the guardians.

Fuck the guardians, all my homies hate the guardians.

Also Glory is touch-averse.

This is meant to be seen as a bad thing that Rainwings don't take prisoners considering how Tui presents them later on and the way this scene is portrayed.

But honestly, Liana has a point, what would they do with them? They're not in the war. They don't need anything from them. At most they'd probably just want them to leave.

This doesn't hint at Rainwing laziness so much as the effect of Glory's hypermilitarized upbringing.

That is super cool.

I imagine Rainwings are world-class botanists, who are quite skilled in breeding plants for particular purposes. An example being flowers that can line your floor and not die from you walking on them everyday, or that perhaps regrow so quickly it seems like they're not dying.

I'm continually upset with the narrative of this book for making Rainwings out to be the exact stereotype everyone thinks they are, because there were a number of directions the messaging could've gone.

Glory goes on to say that sun time probably makes you smarter and fiercer, when really it's just good for your overall physical and mental health.

I'm not saying make the Rainwings especially skilled or scary, as fun as that would be, but she could just let them be peaceful, what's so wrong with that?

This book could've been about Glory --- who was raised to think you always had to keep giving to the world to be worth something, that you should expect the worst in others, that this world with always chew you up and spit you out so you gotta be tough and always hide your vulnerabilities--- realizing that yeah, the Rainwings are genuinely just a peaceful, calm group who do mostly enjoy napping in the sun, and spending time with their friends. That's fine.

There seems to be this thought that you must be sacrificing or suffering in some way to be good or worth respect, but that's not a healthy mindset.

Like the book could've gone the route of Glory getting angry at them for being (in her eyes) uncaring and lazy, content with giving nothing to the world, only for it to be pointed out to her that hey, maybe we don't want to be risking our safety and happiness for petty squabbles that lead to nothing but tears and bloodshed. Maybe we want to live in a place where we can raise our families and live and work alongside friends without fear of war and destruction looming over our heads. What's so wrong with that? Why are they considered stupid for living like that?

Sure others don't live the way you would think is ideal, but who are you to come into their home that they welcomed you into and judge their livelihoods?

Like bitch, I wish I lived there. I wasn't built for the grind.

No, we will not talk about the fact that the Rainwings didn't seem to care when their friends, queen, and students disappeared for long periods of time because I am not emotionally calm enough, and we're not in that part of the book yet.

I also just noticed that, though Glory may hate Kestrel, she also thinks the most like her out of all the DoD, which is... giving me a number of thoughts and ideas.

[whimsyswastry]

Right back at you for the creating your OC ask! :)

Numbers 3, 15 and 17 for everyone?

Oooh...goodness :D This may take a while...as I listed a lot of OCs.

All the Info below the cut 💛

3. How did you choose their name?

Ellaria Trevelyan -> I think I must have been in the midst of reading Game of Thrones. Which, naming her after another character was completely unintentional. I don't even remember thinking about it, until I saw the GoT episode with Ellaria Sand and being like... "Huh... I wonder..."

Ori Lavellan -> Oriana's full name actually came from the fantasy name generator website. It didn't really seem to fit the naive and idealistic character I was crafting, but the shortened version of Ori really did. Plus, I just love nicknames.

Eliza Shepard -> I really like the word Elysium. So, initially, the name was Elysia. But as her background is a twisted version of a War Hero, I didn't want her name being so close to Elysium. I figured Eliza kept the feeling without seeming uninspired.

Lucette de Sardet -> This is another one that I got from a nickname. She's very close to her cousin Constantin. I wanted Constantin to use a petname for her that was one part obnoxious and one part adorable and settled on LuLu, but she's a diplomat and part of the royal family so she couldn't be named Lucy, but Lucette worked perfectly especially with the surname De Sardet.

**I should note that both of my Ryders look the same (default), but I kept waffling on his personality. I couldn't decide between a bitter, angry, daddy-issue ridden asshole who doesn't want anyone to know he has a heart of gold (Thomas) and a goofy, adrenaline junkie, with a nerdy side (Alexander). So I just ended up using both for different stories.

Thomas Scott Ryder -> I created Thomas Scott around the same time I was playing Greefall, and Lucette's faceclaim has always been Antonia Thomas. I thought the name sounded really natural. I like to think he's named after his mother's grandfather who was 10x the father to him that Alec ever was.

Alexander Scott Ryder -> This one was lazy. I just wanted him to be named after Alec, but Scott Alexander didn't sound nearly as good as Alexander Scott.

15. What is something about your OC that makes you laugh?

Ellaria Trevelyan -> She is really outgoing, but doubly so when she's around Cullen who is so reserved. She makes bawdy jokes and gets in his space because she finds it so funny and can tell he likes it, even if it turns his ears scarlet.

Ori Lavellan -> Having grown up with only the noises of nature, she's actually really skittish. Not scared, but easily startled by loud noises. This has lead Varric to calling her Cricket because she jumps so high.

Eliza Shepard -> She has a voracious sweet tooth (in part inspired by my own blasted sugar addiction). She keeps a secret drawer of sweets that Kaidan and Liara pilfer from to help them cope with their biotic metabolism. Eliza still hasn't figured it out because she thinks she ate it and just doesn't remember.

Lucette de Sardet -> She is really diplomatic. It's her job. She's representing her entire country! But she also has a really strong moral compass, and when someone crosses those lines, she has no qualms punching them in the face. Needless to say, she's caused a diplomatic incident or two.

Thomas Scott Ryder -> His relationship with his sister. I only have sisters, but I have a couple cousins who have always been really protective, playful, and rambunctious with me the way I imagine an older brother would have. It's really fun to write and I hope equally fun to read. Especially since he's an asshole to just about everyone else.

Alexander Scott Ryder -> Just how energetic he is. I am always drained so it's lots of fun to explore a character who acts like a kid hopped up on an entire bag of halloween candy. And, just like that kid, how he crashes into his bed at the end of the day.

17. Is there some element you regret adding to your OC or their story?

Ellaria Trevelyan -> Big YES for this one. Initially, her backstory involved abuse by a templar. I thought it was an important part of showing the power imbalance between mages and templars in the circle. But, even though the abuse was only ever eluded to and not explicit, it never felt right. I couldn't do justice to her experience. So Unharrowed (my fic about the Inquisitor pre-DAI) has been on hiatus for the last...5 years. I recently had a breakthrough with her backstory and finally starting writing the version of Unharrowed I've always wanted.

Ori Lavellan -> I have a few ficlets when Ori is really struggling with Solas' departure and uses another character to feel something other than pain...These were written for fictober a few years ago and upon reflection, she never would've done this no matter how much pain she was in.

Eliza Shepard -> This is more of an oversight on my part. But half of her storyline is written as though she has biotics and the other half as though she's just a soldier. I like the story with her as a soldier, it makes her interactions with Kaidan's biotics more novel.

Lucette de Sardet -> It's been a while since I've read any of my Lucette fics...but nothing comes to mind for her :)

Thomas Scott Ryder -> I both love and hate that he smokes clove cigarettes. It fits his angry at the world, leave me a lone so I can sulk outer persona. But I worry that readers will judge him because it's 2185/2819 and he's still partaking in a really unhealthy habit.

Alexander Scott Ryder -> It's not really a character element, but another writing regret regarding him. The only stories I've ever written about Alexander Scott take place after High Noon / breaking up with Reyes. I feel like I could've made the stories infinitely better if I'd taken the time to think about specific storylines or head canons about the way he and Reyes got together. As it is, it feels somewhat generic.

[demonslayedher]

An update on how that sword post is going, kinda

I live a half-hour bus ride from the birthplace of Haganezuka-san's favorite treat, so why not go make a pilgrimage?

Follow me below for dumplings!

I know I seem lazy with Kimetsu Kitchen lately. I am cooking stuff, even though I hate cooking, okay? There's an ingredient I'm practicing with before doing it for another Kimetsu recipe but so far my results suck.

That said, I did choose to go buy Ohagi instead of making it, and I was almost so lazy that had I found loquats at the grocery store, I would have brought one home and taken a picture and said "it's Nakime, get it? It's a biwa."

To my credit, I have made mitarashi dango. It was pretty easy, too. The problem is that you can make so much mochi with a single small bag of mochi flour. It was years ago, I was trying it out with one of my siblings and we had so much mochi that we ran out of anko and quickly had to resort to looking up a mitarashi dango recipe to do something with all that other mochi. And it was good! It had a nice mix of saltiness and sweetness. But we had plates and plates and plates of the stuff, even in a household bigger than a certain ninja clan we couldn't find enough people to eat that stuff and finish it off. No thanks. I'm not repeating that. Here, here's an English recipe, you do it. I'm just here to be a dorky nerd.

I am a perfectly presentable human being. Not to worry, that's not the mask I actually went out in. This one was frustratingly made with the pattern upside down but it's got a spot more Haganezuka style, so I made it work.

The UNESCO World Heritage site referred to is Shimogamo Shrine (which you might know from another anime, Eccentric Family/Uchouten Kazoku, as the home of the titular tanuki family), one of the two major Kyoto shrines associated with the Aoi Festival. If you think I used the KnY cast for mnemonics in studying this festival for a Nerd Test, you are correct. One of the rituals of this festival is when the Sai-Ou, the shrine maiden whom this whole procession is centered around, cleanses her hands at this pond on the shrine grounds. This ritual handwashing is called "Mitarashi". Literally, (honorific)-hand-washing: 御手洗. Since Mitarashi Dango (みたらし団子) is typically written with the 'Mitarashi' in phonetic hiragana, I was stunned when I first read about the ritual (before knowing the origin of the sweet), for I thought the sweet was named like this because you have to wash your hands after eating something so sticky.

Unsurprisingly, the religious ritual is performed at a place called Mitarashi Pond, and there is a place for offerings next to it. The two paper lanterns on either side were contributed by the nearby tea house, Kamo Mitarashi Chaya.

The tea house is just across the street from the shrine grounds. Like many sites popular with religious pilgrims throughout history and all around the world, there are restaurants and gift shops lining the way to the sacred grounds to cater to all the visits, and in Japan's case, this is how many sweets become famous and carry an eternal tie with those religious sites even if the connections are tenuous. Some sweets you can only get by visiting the generations-old shops in person, other sweets are spread throughout the country and anyone can make them. This is what happened in the case of Mitarashi Dango, this tea house had a hit with their addictive sweet and salty sauce and now you can find it ready made in grocery stores across Japan.

Even Aoi, who is talented and can do anything, even cooking (she has my respect) says to Inosuke that she'll "go out and buy some" later because it's just that easy. Plus, my girl Aoi knows better than to make a giant batch of that stuff if she doesn't have to.

It's a very typical little tea house selling a typical array of traditional sweets. When I walked in the first thing they did was pitch their shaved ice to me. A fun fact: in their garden, they have a little temple dedicated to Kishimojin, literally, "demon baby mother god," who is a deity who had 500 children whom she loved and cared for but would steal unrelated children to eat them. A Buddhist monk hid her baby one day and she saw the evil of her ways, repented, studied Buddhism and become virtuous. Yeah, Muzan would probably sneer if he heard a story like that.

Anyway! That pond back on the shrine has another famous practice: washing away paper dolls which have soaked up the impurities and bad influences of the world on behalf of human beings. The simple paper dolls have a vaguely human shape, like Shikigami. I bring this up because while most people picture dango coming in sticks of three big dumplings (though the one Aoi gave Haganezuka had four), it's made here at Kamo Mitarashi Chaya with five small dumplings, to more vaguely represent a human form.

NOM.

I really like my mitarashi dango small instead of huge, it makes for a more generous sauce-to-mochi ratio, and while it can be troublesomely sticky and dripping to eat (I broke my toothpick trying to get them off the skewer and be neat), it is indeed as addictive as anything with a base of sugar or soy sauce might usually be. The small mochi is chewy and soft with a nice crispy texture on the charred bits.

This was a perfect amount to say "mm, that's tasty, I want more, more!! Okay, that's enough."

This tea house offers them for both eat-in and take-out, and having eaten them both ways, I strongly suggest eating them in person. With time to sit, the mochi gets firmer, and the silky sauce begins to harden so that all the dango gets stuck together, and it get even harder to have any delicacy as you eat them. If it wasn't bad enough trying to get my family to eat them all, the time I had these as take-home they were a gift to my office, and I had to force people to hurry and eat them before they were hopelessly stuck not only to each other, but to every surface in the office.

Now, having said all that about rice flour dumplings covered in a sugary soy sauce coating, what does this mean for Haganezuka-san? What connections are there to dive into?

I theorize nothing.

I think he just plain likes Mitarashi Dango.

[somedaytakethetime]

I'm procrastinating my life and I feel like mush so.. I'm back to my papyrus scrolls of text. Today? The Sewing Beast™

And that is to say: Inspiration Images - The Actual Sewing Time! Let's get cracking and break it down.

I was up until like 2am last night (I have horrible sleeping habits lately) and I came across a seamstress that has the perfect style for what I'm going for currently in my life. And I mean in terms of dresses that is. I've figured out that I no longer care so much if I think I look fat in clothes, because the thing is: I'm actually relatively skinny. I'm not supermodel levels of thin, my thighs definitely rub together and I'm meatier on my bottom half but I'm slender still. I have a perfectly healthy weight now, after a few years of... not so great "eating" habits and being not-so-healthy-weighted let's put it in that softer way. I just feel fat. Due to previously mentioned reasons. So, the way I look in my own head likely doesn't actually match the way I look externally. And that's hard to move past and let go of. I would like to look a certain way, but realistically I'll never manage to sustain that, I tried and it's just not possible for me. And with that that's all I'll touch on that subject, so refocusing on the problem at hand: I sort of strongly dislike the look of me in the mirror BUT you know what I dislike even more? BEING UNCOMFORTABLE! I can't stand feeling like I can't breathe when I'm wearing something, or feeling like I'm pinched and pulled tight everywhere. Which has led me to this current approach for more looser fitted clothing. My plan still includes some more "fitted" dresses but my definition of fitted has changed massively lately. Let's break that down.

I need some of this style of looser fitted smock/babydoll type of dress:

I feel like this sort of style will be so comfortable in the clammy days of summer.

My new definition of tighter fit is this:

I'm not a huge fan of the longer sleeves on the wrap dress and the buttoned dress, but I could easily change that. As for something that I like the look of but is a bit more whimsical (so it still fits my personality):

Longer dresses (and skirts) that are flowy and have slits because I think that would balance out how short and stumpy I am. Rompers and dungarees because... girl.. I love a romper and a dungaree okay?? And granny prints. Still want to cosplay your nan's couch, yes I do. (all the photos above belong to Janelle at Rosery Apparel)

The overall look for daily wear dresses would be: comfortable, simple cuts and easy, quick makes (I'm making everything myself so.. need to take in consideration my own laziness). Smock dresses, wrap dresses, and sort of 90s flower child inspiration going into it.

Now let's get into skirts because those are super simple: mini pencil skirts and mini a-line skirts. That's it. That's my new aesthetic. For a woman that hasn't shown a knee to the general public in nearly 8 years? This is ground breaking. Let's look at images because I'm visual.

(links: image 1 and 3 are ill gotten from Pinterest, image 2 belongs to Maja, image 4 belongs to Stephanie, image 6 ill gotten from Pinterest, and image 5 belongs to Stacie)

Easy peasy, super simple, quick to make. I own a million skirts that need re-fitting. Will have to get to that soon. Send help.

Also to add a touch of fancy, because this is my idea of holiday attire:

(all pilfered from the internet, no sources for these)

Wide legged trousers, a-line flowy skirts, sparkly or silky, sweaters on top. That's the whole idea and the whole look.

As for trousers I'm going simple: high waisted, straight cut or wide legged. I feel better if I have breathing room in my clothes, I feel less like a sausage in a too tight casing. So think:

Also letting the kids influence me and throwing it back to the 2000s when I used to wear:

The Cargo Pant™

I like pockets as a style choice and not so much as a practicality choice, what can I say? yes, I know that cargo pants were "appropriated" from men's workwear, especially factory workers and mechanics that needed all those pockets

I think denim I need very little of. I don't like how denim feels, it always feels so uncomfortably stiff to me. But that could just be because I'm poor so the quality of the denim I've worn over the years might be lacking or something, I have no clue. Linen and cotton wrinkle like hell, oui, but they make such comfortable light clothes.. muy needed in my wardrobe. Other features that my trousers might need: elasticated waists. The front would look totally normally but if maybe I add elastic at the back portion then maybe when I eat they won't be too tight over my stomach. That's one of the bothers that I find with my clothes: I don't like being pinched over my stomach area (which fun fact sits essentially above the natural waist level, and on my body it always feels like it's sitting at actual waist level) when I'm eating or when I've just finished eating.

Looking at all of this that seems about it. I'd add a few fun elements with overalls and rompers because I like one full outfit of pants (a dress is a full outfit, but when it comes to pants you always need a layer on top or you're bazooms out in public.. the fix? Rompers. The downside? Bazooms out when you use the toilet..). I also love the idea of some skorts... now, I know I'm old, but there's nothing that delights my heart more than seeming to be wearing a skirt and BAM! they're secret shorts (or pants, depending on how long you make them) plus as someone that tends to sprawl out when she sits OR sit her ass down anywhere in public if I get too tired or bored (yes, I'm 5 years old why do you ask?) I think a secret short or pant is the perfect solution to not flash my Tweety Bird to the world.. 🥴🥴

[oraclekleo]

Feedback 🥰 💜

https://www.tumblr.com/oraclekleo/736941190397771776/gellow-i-want-to-participate-in-your-game-send

Thank you so much for this reading 💜💜💜 "And I must say that your collage is pretty impressive." Hehe, thank you, i used Pinterst and Canvas.

"I can already tell you are most likely a pretty organised and neat person with a love for symmetry and clean lines. 😂 Feel free to correct me. I can be wrong. Nobody’s perfect. 🙂"

Hehe well, it depends, when it comes to online things, my phone's archives📱, my study papers and notebooks, yes I'm very neat but on my daily life i am very unorganized 🫠😔, I'm clean but very very messy(not fixing my bed after waking up, leaving my clothes on the floor, i haven't dusted off my nail polishes in a long long time, my makeup is out in the dresser/vanity ect, ect) basically for digital things i can be very organized but on my daily life , i organize the house once a week.

"Others might be still lazy and trapped in routine but it’s time for you to become productive and abundant. Start early and get ahead of others just like the cherry trees which bloom early and their fruits ripen before many others" owww i love cherry trees! They are so dreamy. I didn't know they bloom earlier than others.

"You might be standing in front of an important choice. One path will keep you grounded and safe, one takes you up to the sky and maybe into directions you could never predict. It’s important for you to make the decision with both a conscious mind and your intuition and heart" I defenely see this, I'm trying to workout how to either go with the flow of my university carrer or try to hassell it out with my pasión.

"You certainly have deep roots in your community and you are well cherished by them. On the other hand, you understand what self-love and self-care mean. Sometimes we are not meant to continue the legacy from the past rather start a new one ourselves and it’s important to decide this. You probably feel excited and full of eagerness now which is a good start. New ideas come to us for a reason but make sure to ground your dreams in reality so you can truly achieve your goals" sooo true! I want to start making sense of my dreams and wishes and do something to get them, i think I'm tired of waiting for a chnage to arrive insted of going after it.

"Don’t try to bottle your feelings up as you are perfectly able to feel them through and process them. Before making important decisions, sit down, calm down and think what it is you want over a cup of tea or any beverage you like" I agree, HIGH-key what i would love to have is someone with the known-how to guide me, but i guess i have to try to meet even more new people to get to this person or group of people.

Thanks a lot for answering this question, thanks a lot for all the details you put into them. You're very sweet and thoughtful 💜

Organising once a week is still pretty neat. I know people who never do. Like never ever. 😂 I'm actually the same. My digital files are in such a perfect order but it takes me days to fold and put washed laundry back into wardrobe. 🤣

As for the choice between career and hassling, remember that doing what you love as a source of income will turn any passion and hobby into real work. Sooner or later you won't be enjoying it that much and you might even completely lose interest in it. Regular job can be dull but it's only job, you do it for money and when your shift is over, you can unwind with your hobbies and passions. But what will you do if your hobbies and passions are turned into your job? How will you relax when you have a tough day? I'm not saying you should necessarily do what you studied. My mom was a construction engineer by education but spend her life working for insurance companies and banks and worked with hands as her hobby. It's important to remember that what we studied doesn't have to become our lifelong career. 😉

Chase after your dreams! Life might seem long now but it passes so quickly. It's never too soon or late to make at least some of your dreams a reality.

You can always acquire the know-how yourself through experience. It might be more comfortable to have guidance but it's bigger adventure to toss away manuals and find your own path. Even if you meet experts, their experience might be very different from yours and their guidance might not align with your personal path. If in doubts, seek within yourself. You know yourself the best. 💖💖💖

Thank you so much for your feedback and feel free to contact me anytime if needed or when you want to just chit chat.

I wish you all the best in your future, make it bright and brilliant! 💎✨

Kleo

[sprnklersplashes]

metalshootingstar

Im very curious to know on your opinion of the video SarahZ made about it now.

ohhh I was very annoyed about that when it came out lol. I think I watched half of it but it was making me too worked up so I stopped halfway through. and I actually used to be a big sarah z fan but I actually stopped following them after that video. nothing personal I'd just remember it exists and get very, very angry.

one of the main things I remember thinking about it was that she says, "it's not like in heathers they just say 'oh this is heather c and she's a bitch'" (paraphrasing) and that sticks out to me because... they do do that in heathers. there is a line in heathers where veronica says "heather chandler, the almighty, she is a mythic bitch". heathers very much did do the thing you're saying it did not do.

from what i can remember, and this may just be my bais showing here, but it felt like a lot of their ciriticisms were in very bad faith. which is ironic because I admired sarah specifically for how they had moved away from bad faith nit-picking content. I remember they had made a criticism about cady being (I think) one dimensional and not having depth and "she just shows up and does stuff" which... is not true? like I can name several characteristics of cady. she's brave and optimistic. she's socially awkward and naive. she's competitive, she's ruthless, at the beginning of the show she prioritises having friends over her morals, something that sets her up perfectly for the arc that follows. like, the entire plot of this musical hinges on the fact that cady grows and changes as a character.

(side note: I feel like the characters in MG are actually quite underrated and the musical mines more depth out of them than the movie does)

I also feel like a lot of the video is Sarah comparing Mean Girls to Heathers and like... we have to accept the fact that while MG and Heathers are similar they are not the same and MG does not have to be a carbon copy of Heathers and this is from someone who likes Heathers more than MG!

and finally I think some of their criticism of the lyrics could've been avoided if they either did what I said in the original post and accepted MG for what it is but also thought about it for more than two seconds. for example, why does janis rhyme cake with cake? is it lazy writing or a subtle way of showing us that janis doesn't actually know what would be at a teenager's party because she has spent so long isolated from her peers with only damian for company? is sexy sexualising teenage girls or poking fun at the oversexulisation of teenage girls? I could make comment about how she claims the lyrics are too 'on the nose' and then proceeds to miss so many points of the lyrics.

but yeah this is all with the note that my bias could definitely be showing because mean girls helped me through such a difficult time. and that I did actually start distancing myself from sarah z's content after that video because yes, I am that petty.

(and obvious disclaimer that I have nothing against sarah as a person which should be obvious but tumblr's going to tumblr)

[cryptidnearby]

Lets talk about tiktok for a second.

I typically post some more adult content, nothing inherently vulgar or nude, just... suggestive.

I recently found that a good portion of my followers are children. Roughly between middle school and early high school ages.

Ive come to the conclusion that this doesn't really bother me, tiktok is literally made for their age group, not mine. Tiktok is an app that belongs to gen z and younger. I am considered an "elder millennial" and I know that it is not a space made for me.

Thats perfectly fine. I had Tumblr, I had MySpace, I had tagged and barely experienced vine (that ones a really grey area).

This revelation has got me thinking though, about how content like mine, on a platform not made for my age group, is able to affect those viewers.

I think im going to change the direction of the content I make. If im going to have some kind of influence on the generations that follow me, I want to leave a positive impression.

This isn't to say that thirst traps are wrong in any way, its that I feel like I have more to say than clever camera angles, lip synching and cleavage shots.

I am undeniably queer, and I like to tell myself that I grew up to be the person who would've protected me when I was a kid. Who I wouldve been comfortable expressing myself around.

I just realized that its a good time to put those words into practice.

Use my platform to tell my story, how I fought to survive, who I had to be to do that and how I forgave myself later down the line.

Life is fair, because it is unfair to everyone, and I cant help but think that there are teenagers out there that need to hear what I can talk at length about. Other kids wrestling with their sexuality and chasing a community that is largely hidden behind large gates. Other kids who are crying in their closet because their parents are living in a traumatic revolving door. Kids that need a way out and don't know where to start. That are living with blinders over their eyes.

I dont mind the hate, I will wear my armor and smile at the children watching because "Old people really fucked us all over didnt they? Don't worry, just do your best." And the boomers can fire all their arrows at my back "Millennials are all lazy narcissists!" And "Avocado toooaaast".

Thats okay.

Originally I made my tiktok account for myself. It was this new thing, and like I said... I kinda missed out on vine. I didnt expect to get followers, I didnt have anything to say.

Now it feels like I have some very important things to say. Things that can help others.

Im not sure where to go with that yet, but I'll get there.

[woossexyponytail]

Anniversary gift

Request.

1: I love it when you moan my name.

11: Do you like that?

33: fuck me like you mean it.

I stood in front of the bathroom mirror, trying to see the rest of my body while turning around in my dress. I've been in here for over ten minutes now and I know Yeosang is getting impatient.

I've never worn something like this before though, and I want to see how it looks when I twist and turn.

The little black silk dress fitting me perfectly in all the right places, I pull the spaghetti strap higher up and take a breath. I look at myself one more time in the mirror. There's nothing else I can do now, I thought to myself as I walked out of the bathroom.

Yeosang was laying on the bed, phone in his hands while waiting, he had on a white shirt that had the first couple of buttons undone, his shirt was tucked into his black tight trousers, I quickly stopped myself from drooling at the sight.

Obviously not hearing me come in I cough to get his attention, I lean against the doorway smirking at him.

"Hi," I said in a voice that's barely more than a nervous whisper. His head moves and he looks at me. He rolls into a sitting position as he drops his phone on his lap, not taking his eyes away from me for a second.

He looks me up and down and the gaze burns me. I keep holding my arms straight unconsciously pulling the dress down. I can tell he knows I'm nervous.

Yeosang gets off the bed and stands in front of me. He moves my arms away from the dress as he slowly spins me around so he can get a good look, I flush red and keep my head down.

He takes one of my hands in his. With his other, he traces a line down my body. I can feel my breathing become uneven, and my skin feels hot. He tilts my head up as he leans in for a kiss.

"I don't even know how to tell you how I feel about you," Yeosang said. He starts to kiss my neck slowly and his hair tickles the side of my face.

"Aren't we going to be late?" I asked. Yeosang hummed as his tongue started pressing against my ear, He pulls me over to the bed, where he sits. He holds my hips and positions me to stand in front of him, between his spread legs.

"I think we can skip dinner and go straight to dessert." He said as he leans in and kisses me in the centre of my body over my dress. It elicits a shiver down my body making me moan his name.

"I love it when you moan my name," he whispered sliding his fingers up my thighs, grabbing a hold of my hips pulling me even closer.

"I could easily stare at you all day. And this," he looks up and down again, referencing the dress, "This is gorgeous. You don't have to do any of this stuff, but you do, and it drives me crazy." I smile and breathe out a laugh.

Yeosang pulls me to straddle his lap, his lips attacking mine hungrily, he nips at my bottom lip causing me to moan at the chance he puts his tongue in my mouth as I suck on his tongue.

I start grinding on him as his bulge gets harder by the second, his mouth moves back to my neck licking and biting probably leaving marks as I become a moaning mess in his arms.

Picking me up he lays me down on the bed as he moves to my underwear, one arm wrapped around one of my legs, making space for him to be completely between them.

He starts kissing me hard over my underwear, and I can feel the silk getting wet and sticky. He drags a lazy line of kisses along the top seam, and I can feel him pulling at it with his teeth.

"Do you like that?" Yeosang asked, my hips buck up involuntarily and Yeosang smirks up at me. I nod my head at him.

"What's that, Y/n? Can't hear you." His head dips down again, and he slowly pulls my underwear down. I lift my hips to help, I move my leg that's not being held by his arm out of them. Instead of throwing the underwear off the bed, he lets them hang from my trapped leg.

His tongue moves in slow motion and it makes me ache. He sets a rhythm of long and hard strokes of the tongue and my body is close to convulsing with that alone. My breathing gets quicker, and feel his free hand sliding down my side, across my stomach, and come to rest over me.

His thumb starts to rub circles, and my breathing is definitely a pant. His mouth moves away but his hand stays where it is. I can't keep my eyes open anymore. I place one of my hands over my mouth and the other is curled around the blanket, pulling it closer and closer. I can feel him watching ever move.

"Fuck me like you mean it." I moan as Yeosang kisses me deeply, he stops touching me and there is no contact between my body and his. My leg falls to the bed and open my eyes.

"Up," he orders, and I do what he says immediately. "Sit up on your knees," he said and holds me up. We're both kneeling on the bed, bodies pressed together. He kisses me hard and I can feel him through his clothes and my lack thereof.

Yeosang quickly takes his shirt and trousers off leaving just his underwear, he bites at my neck and his hands are somehow everywhere at once. I wrap my arms around his neck when I feel his hand return to between my legs. His index and middle finger are both in me without warning, and my knees give way.

I press in closer to him and down harder on his hand. When my body is shaking he lets go and pushes me back. I make a sound of surprise. "Back up. All fours," he instructs.

He lightly slaps my ass. I can feel my stomach turn in anticipation, but I like not having to make decisions. Being bossed around like that. I feel him take hold of my hips roughly. He's lost his underwear somewhere in the past few seconds, and he's rock fucking solid.

I can feel it between my legs, brushing against the soft skin of my inner thighs. Yeosang leans over my back and kisses me gently down my spine. I arch into the kisses. One of his hands holds my hips in place his fingers dig in and it almost hurts. His other arm is wrapped around the front of my leg and is massaging me again, making sure I'm wet.

He lines himself up and slowly, agonisingly slowly, enters me. The pace starts slow and careful and when I start to move a little quicker, Yeosang takes it as a sign. It becomes fast and hard and I can't keep my arms straight. They bend and I press my head into the mattress. Yeosang keeps one hand on my hip, helping me keep pace. The other indecisively moves between clit, bra, and being wrapped around me completely. The angle is good, I can feel how full I am.

It builds and builds and I cum at the same time, but he does harder. He doesn't give me a minute to calm down. He flips me over and takes off my dress. It goes flying across the room. He's still sitting back on his knees, and he drags me close so my legs are up around his hips. He kisses me everywhere and ends with his face in front of mine. I kiss and it's gentle and sweet. He holds me in a hug, w both catch our breath against each other.

"I think we're going to miss that reservation" Yeosang breathed out panting, I hum in agreement but was too tired to say anything, just then the door slams open revealing Wooyoung. Quickly grabbing the covers to cover myself Wooyoung rolls his eyes at our action.

"Oh please, it's not like I haven't walked in on you two having sex in the living room before" Wooyoung snorts out giggling to himself.

"What do you want?" Yeosang asks angrily at the interrupted, glaring daggers at his roommate. While I just sit quietly face flush with embarrassment.

"If your not using that reservation can I use it? Ok thanks bye!" Wooyoung yells without Yeosang getting a say in at all, he sighs falling back onto the bed looking tired, I lean on top of him as I stroke his face.

"I hate him." He whispered I nodded leaning in to place small licks and kisses over his neck, he hums as he rolls us over him being on top.

"Round two?" He asked smirking, I grinned as I carried on kissing him, Yeosang grabbed one of my legs lifting it up and around his waist whispering "Happy anniversary."

[bteezxyewriter12]

Player/ 5

Pairing- San x Named Reader

Includes- fluff

Series Masterlist

J POV

"Next roller coaster?", I ask excitedly

We've been on four of them already. I wanna go on all of them

San laughs, "Yeah sure. I didn't know you like roller coasters so much."

"Oh man I love them. I used to hate them when I was younger. But I forced myself on one and I loved it."

"That's cool that you made yourself do something. You found something you like"

I nod. "How about a floorless one?", I ask

"Hell yeah!"

"Cool. Let's go", I say excitedly

San takes my hand and I freeze. He hasn't touched me at all today and this is the first time. He stops, looking at me confused. Then he looks where I'm looking, at our hands

"Oh sorry", he says and loosens his grip on my hand

To my surprise I stop him and hold his hand tighter. He looks up at me and I nod. He gives me half a smile, then leads me to the next coaster line

I smile a little, really liking how his hand feels around mine. His is bigger, my small one fitting in it so perfectly. What is wrong with me? Why am I so happy to hold San's hand? I don't know but I'm not going to question it

Instead, I just enjoy feeling happy

--------------------------------------------------

"Ready for food?", San asks

We've already been here for three hours and have gone on all the roller coasters.

"Yeah. I can eat"

He chuckles, "Alright. Let's go"

We choose a restaurant and get burgers

"Sit outside?", he asks

I nod, "Yeah ok"

We pick a table far from other people, sit across from each other and eat silent for a few minutes. How is it awkward? We were fine before but now it just feels weird

"So what are you in school for?", he asks

Oh shit, he's really doing the get to know you stuff. Ok I'll bite

"Forensic science"

His eyebrow raises, "Like for crime?"

I nod, "Yeah. I want to work in the lab. Not actually go to a crime scene. I don't think I'll be able to handle that"

I definitely can't go to a bloody murder scene. I'll just puke and mess up the crime scene

"Wow, so you're like super smart"

I laugh, "I guess? I'm only smart with things I like though."

He smiles, "Nerd"

I pout, throwing a fry at him. He laughs and it's such a nice sound. Who'd think he'd have such a nice laugh? Or that I'd like the sound of it

"It's fine, I like nerdy girls. It's hot"

I feel my face on fire. Did he really just say that? God why am I blushing like a school girl?

He tilts his head, eyes on me, "Cute"

"Shut up", I smile, "So what do you do?"

"Well I don't go to school. It's not for me"

I nod. I get it, it isn't for everyone

"I work at a gym. As a trainer"

Figures. He normally wears tightish shirts and I can see his muscles under it. And his arms are muscular too

"Impressive. I guess you work out there too?"

He nods, "Yeah. I can use everything for free, so why not"

True. I'd work out anytime I could if I could do it for free

"So you train girls?", I ask, figuring that's where he picks up some girls

"No"

I look up at him to find him watching me. I raise one eyebrow and he speaks

"I don't. I train guys. When I'm working I don't want to be hit on. I take my job seriously. I don't want to be responsible for any injury that could happen if the clients aren't paying attention and flirting"

"Uh injuries?", I question

"Yeah. Anything could happen. Sprains, torn muscles, dropping weights on their body, using the machines incorrectly that can cause injury. I don't need to have someone hurt while I'm working"

Holy shit that's a lot of injuries that could happen. Thank god I'm a lazy fuck and have no worry about being hurt at a gym

"I didn't know that could happen."

"Yeah it happens when people who have no experience come in and start using the machines without having a trainer evaluate them or teach them how to use the machines"

Well that sucks. But I get it. He doesn't want to be responsible for someone being dumb and hurting themselves. I wouldn't either. And people are so stupid, it's a high risk

Trying to lighten the mood, I joke, "So if I came to your job, you wouldn't be my trainer? The one person I'd know there and you'd stay away from me"

"No, I would", he answers and I'm surprised. Didn't he just say he doesn't train girls

"For you I'd do it"

Uh ok, this is getting a little bit serious. I swallow hard

"Maybe you should come and check it out", he says softly

I mean I can. I just hate to exercise. I hate to sweat M. It's gross and I hate the way my clothes stuck to my body, how hot I get, how hard I have to breathe. It's just not appealing

"I kinda suck when it comes to working out. I'm super lazy and a big baby"

He bursts out laughing, "It's ok. I'll help you"

I don't know why but I find myself wanting to go if he's there . God I'm surprised at my feelings and sudden thoughts around him. I never thought I'd have a conversation with San, let alone have a fun time with him. Or want to go work out with him. Still, I want to check it out. See how he works

"Ok so how about after the semester ends, I'll check it out?"

He smiles his dimpled smile and my heart beats faster

"Yeah ok. I'll be there. Just let me know when you wanna come so I can uh....clear my schedule", he says blushing.

My god it's so cute. "Ok. I will"

He nods and we just sit there awkwardly for minute

"So uh do you have a job?", he asks

I make a face, "Yeah. One I hate"

He laughs, "Well don't leave me hanging. What's your job?"

"Starbucks"

He raises his eyebrow, silently asking me to continue

"Sometimes I take the orders and work the register which I hate. Other days I make the drinks. Those days are good days"

"Good days?"

"Yeah when I'm left alone. When I don't have to talk to the public", I explain

"Anti social much?", he teases

Oh he has no idea. I love being alone. I can find so many things to do to occupy my time

"Yeah actually. More like a severe introvert. I hate people"

He laughs again, "You hate people? Why?"

"Because they're dumb. When they order they're rude and act like I'm beneath them. And so stupid with everything. Why do you think I want to work in a lab with limited people?"

He laughs loudly, "I guess that'd be a good job for an introvert"

I nod, "Yup"

"What else do you like?"

I feel so weird talking about me

My friends like Mingi, Yunho and Wooyoung know things about me and I don't have to tell them anything. But San really doesn't know me and he really does want to get to know me. And I find I really want to get to know him too

"Well I really like to read. I have like three books shelves in my apartments, filled to the brim. There's so much books that I've started piles on the floor"

"Oh yeah? What kind of books?", he asks

"Fantasy mainly. Historical fiction. Sci-fi if I really like the synopsis of the book"

"Fantasy. That's like Harry Potter right?"

I laugh, "Yeah like Harry Potter. But there's more than just Harry Potter"

His cheeks turn red and my god it's so cute. "Oh"

"It's ok San. I'm guessing you don't read a lot?"

"Sometimes. More like manga or comics"

Sounds about right for a guy. Normally they read hard fantasy, manga, comics, graphic novels or non fiction

"That's cool. What do you like to do?"

His face turns red. Oh god, is he embarrassed? That's adorable

"San?", I question

"I uh like to uh sing. And dance"

That is definitely something I'd never in my life think that he would like to do

"Really? Sing and dance? What kind of dance? Like at a club?"

He shakes his head, "No more like choreography"

"Like BTS?"

He nods. Oh my god. I have to see him do that

"Can I see you dance?"

He shakes his head so fast

"Oh c'mon San. You just told me you sing and dance. I have to see your moves and I definitely have to hear your voice"

"I shouldn't have said anything", he mutters

Shit he's really embarrassed. I didn't mean to do that. "Oh c'mon. Don't be embarrassed. I think it's cool you do both. I suck at dancing and singing. You have to be better than me"

"No way", he answers

Oh yes way. I have two left feet and the voice of a seagull

"Trust me. I suck. But if I show you how much I suck, then you have to dance and sing for me"

He's quiet for a minute thinking "Ok", he finally says, "But you go first. Whenever this is supposed to happen"

"Deal."

"So you told me something that embarrassed you, I'll tell you something I like that's embarrassing"

"You don't have to"

"I want to", I say

"Ok", he nods

"I uh really like dinosaurs"

"Dinosaurs. Like the skeletons"

"Well yeah. But also learning about them. The different kinds. Get me in a natural history museum with dinosaurs in it and I go insane. Total nerd out"

"Joanne, dinosaurs are awesome. That's not embarrassing"

Is he kidding? Mingi and Yunho make so much fun of me when I bring up dinosaurs

"Maybe if you're five it's not embarrassing. But 22? It's embarrassing"

He scoffs, "No it's not. Anyone who tells you that is an idiot. It may be nerdy when you go all scientific about it but like I said I like nerdy girls."

I can't help but blush and smile, looking away from him

"No look at me", he says, "I want to see you're pretty smile"

I blush even harder but I do look back at him

He's just staring at me, "So pretty"

"Oh my god stop it", I squeak, hiding behind my hands

He smiles and I say, "You have a pretty smile. You're dimples are cute"

"Thanks"

I just nod. After a few seconds of us staring at each other, he breaks the silence

"So more rides?", San smiles

I nod, "Yeah but slow rides for now. I don't wanna puke everywhere"

He makes a face, "Yeah good idea"

"Wanna go on the race cars?"

"Sure, whatever you want"

"Yeah but do you wanna?", I ask

He nods, "Yeah"

"Ok", I smile

We get up, throwing our stuff in the garbage and he takes my hand again. As we walk, I move my hand, intertwining my fingers with his

I have no idea what I'm doing or why. I just know I want to. He glances at me, smiling, then keeps walking

And I have a big idiotic grin on my face too

@starry-jinnie @xduygu-arsx @derpjungkook

@tayyainthehood @alecanal93 @loveymochi

@aunt-mei @xciiiomwliah @chsani

@mingkisbitch @theaufanartist

[incorrect-quotes-from-she-ra]

Morning! I hope you don't mind if i give you yet another She-Ra thought I'm too damn lazy to post on my own. Also, it's long again. I WILL find that character limit some day.

So, we know the way Shadow Weaver raised Adora resulted, among other issues, in her being selfless to the point of self-sacrifice, which came to a climax in the Heart's failsafe business.

And it's been suggested that this was basically intentional on Shadow Weaver's part. Basically, selflessness is a very beneficial quality for others to have. My theory is that <b>her plan for Adora had always been specifically for her to someday use the failsafe and release all magic</b>.

(i will admit i am also curious how formatting works in this app. thank you for your help with these experiments)

So, evidence. Let's start with her name. I know this is a remake and they were stuck with the existing names, but there's a scene where Scorpia complains about it ("yeah i GET it, everyone LOVES you"), which constitutes the writers acknowledging its meaning, which makes me think it's fair game to analyze.

First, I'm obviously assuming Shadow Weaver choose it, as part of her ongoing parenting plan. It's also possible it was her original First One-given name, we don't know. Neither quite works because either she or Light Hope should have had some issues knowing what the name was and they clearly knew automatically. Really the entire series is weird in that everyone communicates with everyone else way too easily, and i will definitely rant about that someday.

For now let it stand that Shadow Weaver is the parent figure, it makes the most sense for her to pick the name, both in-universe and narratively, so i shall assume so by default. I have two things to say about that choice.

First, as we all have noticed, most of the princesses have names ending in -a. All of them, if you count "Glimma". It's never said to be intentional, but it would make sense. And then IF such a tradition exists among Etheria's royalty, it's not unreasonable for Shadow Weaver, a notable and moderately respected member of the land of knowledge, to know about it.

And then if she knew, of course she would take it into consideration when looking for names. Admittedly it's a little weird with the anti-Princess propaganda that the Horde has, but she doesn't really need to explain or justify this. Hordak has a very [i]laissez-faire[/i] attitude, and everyone else she clearly doesn't care about.

And if she knew or suspected that the princesses' powers were related to the Heart of Etheria, which i will argue for later, then giving her a princessy name is also adequately ironic.

The second name bit is that Scorpia clearly knows some Latin, but not enough. True, <em>adorare</em> means to worship and/or to love, but Latin verbs are more complex than that. _Adora_ specifically is 3rd person singular present indicative active. The translation would be "she loves".

Names aside, i want to talk about how they (we) learned about the Heart of Etheria. Castaspella doesn't know what to do, Shadow Weaver suggests they take a road trip to research, which she's reticent about but concedes is probably the best use of her time, and they find success. We don't know how long it took them, but i had the distinct impression that it wasn't very long.

Naturally, I'm suggesting Shadow Weaver knew all along, and led Castaspella on the trip to have an excuse for the inevitable "how do you know?". Also tricked her into thinking it was /her/ discovery, and maybe even that she was succeeding where Shadow Weaver had failed before, if necessary.

That's why she's so excited to share their results with everybody, and Shadow Weaver cuts her off, apparently just to antagonize her for fun, but I'm suggesting it was also because for her this is the culmination of a decades-long plan, and she wants to Get On With It.

It's also interesting that there was a mural depicting the Spell of Obtainment in the hallway leading to the failsafe. It was a reminder of Shadow Weaver's past, and an opportunity for her to show she regrets her results but doesn't repent from her choices, which i quite like actually. But I'm also saying that, meta-textually, it was a signal that she'd been there before, literally.

And then there is the potential in-universe connection, since we don't know what exactly the spell was meant to be obtaining. Power, for sure, and from what happened we're probably meant to assume it's tapping into some sort of demonic entity or dimension.

Fair enough, except that it never comes up again. And it's kind of a big plot point that Etheria is isolated from the rest of the cosmos, which may or may not conflict with it having a contactable "hell". Meanwhile there's the Heart of Etheria Project collecting all that magic, which Mara's allies (and their descendants) would know something about, have access to at least one backdoor to, and may well have tried to tap into its power at some point.

And then what went wrong may well be one of the defense mechanisms of the Project, though I'm admittedly veering into unfounded speculation.

So, a rough timeline. Light Spinner was always motivated to excel and craved power. She was probably always envied the princesses, who command greater magic than most sorcerers with apparently none of the study and practice.

She took to researching everything she could that might lead to power, eventually discovering the chamber with the failsafe, and presumably other information left by Mara's Friends, either in other chambers or in documents she's since removed. She would have learned a lot of things from this.

As i suggested, i believe she knew there's some connection between the princesses at large and the Heart of Etheria. Incidentally, i don't know exactly what that connection is, and in particular whether princesses were created by the Project or an existing phenomenon that the First Ones co-opted. But it doesn't matter, exactly.

What's important is that there's clearly a connection, more specifically a control system for the princesses and their magic, which is presumably related to how Shadow Weaver was able to tap into the Black Garnet's power. With Hordak's help, obviously, since she clearly believed it when he claimed he could cut her off at will, but he's later shown to have basically no understanding of First Ones' tech, so the knowledge must have come from her.

For the record, i would guess she thinks princesses are artificial, empowered both magically and politically to keep the planet in check, and that they would be depowered once the failsafe was fired. I also think that may be true, actually, since it almost happened when Entrapta was messing with the system, and if i recall none of them were shown to use any magic after Adora did fire it, while she clearly used Perfuma's power. But anyways!

Back to what Shadow Weaver learned, she would know some of what the failsafe does, namely disrupt the system that's hoarding most of the planet's magic, thereby spreading magic to all (most notably her), and some of how to use it, and the fact that she couldn't do so and hope to live, and some of the criteria for who can. That part is important.

But first, she also learned the Spell of Obtainment, deemed it more likely but didn't think she could do it herself, despaired of getting help until she thought Hordak's rise to fame would give her #casus belli#, lost her patience when the Mystacor leadership disagreed, etc etc etc. Pretty uncontroversial in this part, i think.

After she'd joined the Horde, when Hordak showed up with baby Adora and wanted to lump her with the rest of the orphans they have, Shadow Weaver pleaded to have her get special treatment. She even said that she's special, and it couldn't have been her leadership skills or good heart, since she didn't have either yet. It's heavily implied she could recognize her as a First One, but it's not clear why she would care, since they were known for leaving behind advanced technology, which a baby also doesn't have. Unless, of course, she knew there are devices only a First One could use, and maybe has plans related to that.

So I'm pretty sure she learned the criteria that the failsafe requires, devised some spell or technique to check people for them that she pretty much used all the time, just in case, and was very surprised when a newborn tested positive. She was also surprised when Hordak made her personally responsible for the raising of the kid, but her reaction is pretty much "ok, that could work, i guess".

Also also, i suspect she can read First One script. Not perfectly like Adora, but better than Bow's parents probably. Mostly because when she puts Adora's hand on the crystal and says "i think you know the password", that seems like a very transparent attempt to pretend she knows it too when she doesn't. But that seems irresponsible at such a crucial moment, she and Castaspella should really have researched it earlier. Or at least her line there should have been "you can read this, right?" or somesuch.

So I'm thinking it's a double bluff, hoping everybody assumes she doesn't know so she doesn't have to reveal how and why she knows, again.

And that's all i have, i think? This is not nearly as well laid out as i would like. But then, nothing ever is, right?

Also it's not even close to morning anymore. Thank you if you even got this far, and have a good evening!

hi!!! this took me a while to answer, i'm so sorry about that <3

i'm very low on energy today so i cannot summon up the brain energy to respond properly to this, as much as i want to, i'm really sorry for that as well

i love this theory!! it actually fits in really well with canon and makes, like, a LOT of sense now that i think about it. i definitely wouldn't have thought of this on my own, so thank you for sharing this with me!! :D