❌ The batkids tearing apart the Manor the moment Bruce and Alfred are gone
✅ Dick putting the rooms on Airbnb
✅ Harper auctioning autographed bat-merch
✅ Jason listing the Batmobile as a rental car
✅ Cass holding dance classes in the ballroom
✅ Duke renting out the Batcave as a party room
✅ Steph opening a drive-thru at the kitchen window
✅ Damian starting a doggy daycare in the yard
✅ Barbara giving historical tours
✅ Tim selling popcorn in the home theater
✅ Profit
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I'm fully convinced that the only people in the batfam beside Tim that have Kon's respect is Alfred, Steph, and Cass
Like I'm imagining Timkon being a thing and Tim gets injuried, and like Kon refuses to speak to Bruce, mich less look at Dick, or acknowledge Jason or Damian
Like he's peak "My bf may have forgiven what you've done to him, but I havent" and like would be the pettiest bitch possible, but the Alfred walks in and he's all "Hey Alf, how have you been, Ma's doing great, did you try that starwberry rhubarb pie recipe, to die for right?", and like he jokes around with Steph and is all "see ya next Tuesday for lunch" and he like talk with Cass about her next dance recital and just being overall friendly puppy dog, but like the second they're gone and it's any combo of Bruce, Dick, Jason or Damian he's just resting bitch face but like all of them are like oblivious to why Kon wouldn't like them
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The batkids babysit the supersons, how bad can this go?
Dick: Where'd they go? Tim, I thought you were watching them.
Tim: I left them right here!
Tim: *gestures to the empty spot on floor*
Barbara: Well clearly they must have slipped out when you weren't looking. I'll check the surveillance footage. Everyone else split up.
Dick: I'll do a sweep around the house and go through the neighborhood after that. Tim, you take their school and the park. Cass, retrace their patrol routes.
Cass: *nods and grabs her helmet*
Tim: I'll text Steph and ask her to keep an eye out in Burnside.
Barbara: I just got a hold of Jason and Duke. They'll divide up the Narrows and Park Row. But I did promise Jason that Tim would do his laundry.
Dick: Babs, can you also tap into all our apartments and safehouses too? And maybe some JL buildings?
Barbara: I'll need the Batcomputer but sure.
Tim, on his phone: Harper and Bette said they can cover the outskirts.
Barbara: Luke's offline but I can use the Batwing to get an aerial view.
Dick: Perfect! Rendezvous at Batburger in an hour if we don't find anything. Remember, Bruce is our last resort.
Everyone: *splits up*
Damian and Jon: *emerge from under the floorboards*
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Never Hidden
Stephanie was bored.
Bored
Bored
Bored
bored
bored
It had been a slow week.
There was an Arkham breakout three weeks ago and they finally rounded up the last of them. there's always a few stragglers but everyone seemed to be checked off the list.
She wasn't assigned to any new cases and she's grounded from Missions outside of Gotham for bedazzling the Batmobile last month. It's only like another week but it still feels so long.
She just finished her homework so now honestly she's just looking for something to do. She's honestly just messing with the bat computer until Jason walks in.
"What are you doing here” Jason says pausing after taking his helmet off, looking confused. "I thought you'd be off with Cass”
“Grounded from outside missions” Stephanie replies turning the computer chair around “When do you get back in town”
“ Not even an hour ago” Jason says as he moves to her "What are you doing there, a case?”
“Nah” Stephanie says that she turns back to face the back computer “ I don't got any Active cases, I looked at a couple of in Active cases but ehh”
“So what are you doing” Jason finally reaches her and stops to look
“Honestly just playing around with the controls and snooping” Stephanie pulls up a file on the bat computer “Did you know Damien downloaded his Cheese Viking game onto the bat computer”
“Really” Jason laughs out
“Really, see” Stephanie says that she shows Jason the file “OMG this has been on here for 10 months
“Bruce didn't even let me download stuff he uninstalled Zelda when I tried.”
Stephanie and Jason continue to chat and work through the files on the back computer or at least the ones they have clearance to access. Eventually they get bored and start Looking through the Security camera
The only person in the house was Tim. He wasn't really doing anything exciting but he was on the phone. They watched him for a minute just checking to see what he would do.
They were about to switch off when he started yelling at whoever was on the phone. Both Stephanie and Jason were startled. They zoomed in and turned on the audio.
“I don't have time for your shit Ras.” Tim basically screamed into his phone.
Stephanie's a little surprised that Alfred didn't come walking in to check what's going on.
“you're the one who messed up, so clean up your own messes.” Tim then listens to Ras on the other line speak. "if you learned you know boundaries and actually tried for once then maybe Dan wouldn't be trying to Stage a coup.”
“ Why is Ras talking to Tim about a coup?” Jason asked as he looked over to Stephanie with a raised eyebrow.
Jason thought he'd been away for a while but not long enough for this to happen.
“I have no idea. Every time he talks to me about Ras it sounds like he'd Rejoice if he dropped dead. I didn't even know Tim had his number let alone that they talked.” Stephanie started trying to think of any missions or crises that could have happened for the two of them to talk.
“ he does not get that from me, the entire want for power thing is entirely your fault.“ Tim pulled out a second phone from the bag beside him and looked to be texting someone else as he was listening to the person on the phone.
”I'm texting Dan as we speak I'll figure out what's going on that would make your controlling ass happy.” Tim pauses to listen to the other end of the phone.
“Good.” Tim rolls his eyes and then hangs up the phone.
“That man does not do anything useful.” Tim seems to say to an empty room probably not expecting to be spied on by two bored vigilanties.
What the hell was that both Stephanie and Jason thought to themselves.
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