#this guy had a ton of mutuals who were minors too! all of us (me at the time i think)

[tigersharks-moving]

Zlatan... God do you fucking remember how they tried to justify it with "he's just a character he's not real it's fine" and then instantly remade to avoid any criticism

I KNOWWWWW fucker literally had “fiction affects reality you nasties” IN HIS CARRD and was still like “no but it’s okay guys it’s just a drawing!!!!!1! i can think the p*do is hot”

[umbran6]

The Argument Against Caleo

Spoilers up to Blood of Olympus and beyond. Beware! (Or not, the book series has been out for a few years, get over it). I wrote this after seeing a user wondering why people didn’t like Caleo, or in some cases, hated it. Here, I want to explain the answer as much as possible while doling out my own points. 

One of the main grievances I have as a fan of Leo Valdez would be the ship Caleo, or Leo x Calypso. It’s a complicated ship, to say the least, with multiple issues that make me question why people like the ship. And I admit it, they initially had some chemistry, but there’s multiple issues that Uncle Rick produced through making such a relationship that makes it extremely open to criticism, criticism which I will explain through this post.

One of my main points against them is that the ship was created on a very limited time scale. Although we aren’t given an exact date to date of when Leo and Calypso met to when they fell in love, we can safely estimate it to be a week at best. Such a limited amount of time from going through the multiple stages of a relationship already stresses the limits of the suspension of disbelief.

A counterexample would be Percabeth, or Percy x Annabeth. Throughout the series, we aren’t introduced to them being romantically involved until the Titan’s Curse, which was two years after they met. Specifically, this is brought up by Aphrodite, the goddess of love herself. Admittedly, Percy and Annabeth were twelve years old when they first met, when romance was definitely out of the picture, especially with a quest to get the Master Bolt.

However, from there we get to see multiple examples of their character depth, ranging from their respective fatal flaws to their ambitions, hopes and dreams, and their friendship. We get to see the slow build up of their chemistry, which was a really good writing move on Uncle Rick’s part. These characters took their sweet time to get to where they wanted to go, and despite the false romantic lead of Rachel, they still got together.

On the other hand, we don’t see enough of this between Leo and Calypso — we only see one book where they interacted with each other in The House of Hades, and that was only for a handful of chapters. While they are definitely older so they can jump straight to romance (some may say too old, but I’ll get to that) its still a pretty huge gap to jump through without making it stick. This makes it hard to root for a ship when it is built on a rather faulty foundation from the ‘they just met’ to ‘they get together’, especially when they don’t have a lot of events to show their chemistry.

Which brings me to Ogygia, which has raised a few red flags for me when looking at it from a retrospective point of view. Now, we know what the main issue of the island is that the hero who landed on said island can’t leave until Calypso falls in love with them. And we’ve seen this with Percy during the Battle of the Labyrinth, where he lands in the island and Calypso falls in love with him while tending to his wounds from, you know, being erupted from freaking Mt. St. Helens. Needless to say, this falling in love with each other montage happened quickly to the point of suspicion, which sets up the complication that Calypso and Leo might have fallen in love due to magical intervention.

And hear me out, because although this  might be a pretty big pill to swallow, we have evidence for this through Percy. It only takes one chapter for Calypso and Percy to meet, and the next he’s willing to consider leaving Camp Half-Blood and Annabeth behind to live on the island when Hephaestus gives him the choice to leave Ogygia or stay. We don’t even get an explanation on why Percy considered giving it all up just so he can be with her. All we know is, girl meets boy, now they want to live on an isolated island forever. It’s especially absurd considering Percy’s hamartia (fatal flaw) is freaking loyalty to those he loves.  Needless to say, It’s a huge YIKES, especially when we apply it to Leo and Calypso. 

It also raises the possibility that the romantic relationship between them is doomed to failure. And if you guys want to fight me on this, let’s look at Jason and Piper, a couple whose relationship started with a similar foundation. Piper had romantic memories implanted into her brain by Hera through the use of the Mist, while Jason was reduced to a Tabula Rasa (a blank slate for those who lack culture) by said goddess. They broke up before the Trials of Apollo because it was clear that when the dust settled, Piper had been aware that their romance was a lie and that their intentions to stay together was a mix of delusion and pressure from freaking Aphrodite. Leo and Calypso get together under what is arguably a very similar set of conditions if Ogygia’s magic had any influence on their relationship, and that this magic could wear off if given enough time. 

Third, and here’s a pretty big one for me, would be Calypso’s character, mainly because there are a lot of unfortunate implications attached to it. In The Blood of Olympus, she was turned into the divine equivalent of Princess Peach, with Leo being her Mario (except he saves her with a badass metal dragon). Its extremely unnecessary to make a character, especially as one such as Calypso, get  turned into the typical reward of a B-Class action movie. It’s insulting and puts her up as a trophy, a narrative that is definitely not ok by any means necessary.

In another direction, Calypso is also really, really worrying when things don’t go get her way. First, let’s look at The Odyssey, the first myth she pops up. Calypso had imprisoned Odysseus for ten years on her island until Hermes said to let him go, and although it gives them plenty of time to fall in love, it also raises the implications of stockholm syndrome. Then we’ve got the fact that Calypso cursed Annabeth out of spite, implicitly saying that she wished the daughter of Athena would suffer the same isolation that she did, which came to reality when Percy and Annabeth met the Arai in Tartarus. And Annabeth wasn’t even aware that she was still in Ogygia, much less intentionally intervened in the matter. When Percy left Ogygia, rather than be angry at Percy, Calypso cursed Annabeth out of all people to suffer the same loneliness and misery she went through. That’s some Hera at her worst levels of spite. 

Through such evidence we can see that Calypso is extremely wrathful towards those who break her heart even though they don’t want to. It certainly implies that Calypso isn’t in a good state of mind, and could easily repeat said actions if provoked. We could almost compare it to Medea and the original Jason, but at least in that case, Medea has every right to be pissed off at Jason and take her revenge. Calypso’s curse and how she handles things certainly implies a level of immaturity that would end in disaster if they broke up.

One issue that, I’ll admit is more from my personal point of view is that the ship took a lot of Leo’s character and threw it in the garbage in Blood of Olympus. Though we see him do a lot of stuff behind the scenes, the fact that its all for the goal of reaching Calypso just reduced him to someone who is more focused on love than, you know, fighting the evil goddess that was responsible for killing his mom and getting sweet sweet revenge. While the revenge plot can be cliched sometimes, it can be played well, while romance and the typical ‘always save the girl’ trope is just overdone. If Leo had been allowed to, you know, be more focused on other things rather than Calypso, we could have seen a lot more variety in his character.

For example as one of the possible character arcs he could’ve gone through, Leo has always been alone among the couples, often being isolated. Heck, Nemesis herself stated that he would always be the seventh wheel, and that he would never find a place among his brethren. Though some fellow tumblr users have taken this in multiple ways, either saying that he should learn to be happy by himself or that he is socially isolated in the Argo II because of these romantic relationships (I prefer a mix of both). Uncle Rick just giving him a girlfriend seems like taking the easy way out of solving such an issue and abandoning what could’ve been a rather interesting character arc. The relationship isn’t a bad thing if we remove some of the unfortunate implications, but it is a bad way to end what is a complex and realistic problem for a character and in some cases maybe possible in real life.

One more minor but still yikes worthy point is that there’s a huge age gap between them. We’re not talking about the ‘Hazel is 15 and Frank is 17 and in one year that’ll be a problem because then Hazel will be jailbait’ age gap. And even then, we can argue that Hazel is older since she is chronologically ninety-one years old. No, Calypso is older by millennia in terms of mindset and body due to the perks of being a goddess, while Leo is sixteen.

God-to-Mortal relationships are already complicated, even with emotionally and socially well-functioning adults. The fact that Leo is underage, inexperienced with romance (despite his flirting, Calypso was his first kiss), and has been through a freaking ton of trauma in his youth, does not make this okay. At best, they’re both mutually interested in each other but may have different expectations when it comes to a relationship. At worst, Calypso is taking advantage of a boy just so she can get out of Ogygia and possibly dumping him later on like the wrapping of a candy bar. Even though Calypso lost her immortality during The Trials of Apollo, that doesn’t even compensate for the immense age gap alongside Leo’s guilt at the possibility that he might’ve been responsible for her losing said immortality.

Oh, and about Leo... I’m a fan of him, but I can admit that he is in a bad spot both mentally and emotionally throughout the series. He’s lost his mom due to a mix of his own powers and Gaea’s trickery, and never had the chance to fully process that event and come to terms with it. The foster home system alongside his own trauma has forced him to hide his emotions through a façade of happiness and jokes when it’s quite clear to me he needs a therapist, stat. He's also run away from several foster homes, implying this means he was and still is being affected by the event. His mask is still on during The Blood of Olympus considering he hid a lot of things from Piper and Jason.

Speaking about them, not helping this matter is the fact that he’s rather isolated in terms of friendships since Jason and Piper, his supposed best friends are more interested in locking lip rather than, you know, actually hanging out with each other.  He doesn’t have good friendships with the rest of the Seven, and the closest ones he does have is with Hazel and Frank. And even then they start off in the wrong spot since Frank is very insecure about possibly losing Hazel to him during Mark of Athena while Hazel in the meantime, is also dealing with the fact that he is the descendant of her possible boyfriend Sammy Valdez. 

This could indirectly have made him desperate for affection since he has nobody else to confide in during the rest of the series, which is a bad mental state to be in when one lands on Ogygia, the island that we’ve seen could possibly force two people to fall in love with each other. A romantic relationship is not something that he needs or something that will help him in the future. He needs more than that, and having him in one that could end in disaster is the last thing he needs. 

And that does not make him a bad person, much less a bad character. While some who are similarly emotionally and socially isolated may turn to violence or creepy behavior on those they want affection from, Leo does not do that to the other characters. It just means that he as a character needs more time to recover and develop before we go giving him romantic relationships, much less one with Calypso.

That’s not to say that they don’t have some things in common. Both are starved for love and affection, with Calypso being constantly rejected by heroes while Leo was rejected by foster homes and his own family. It’s a trait that they have in common, but it shouldn’t be the only thing that they have in common, especially since it is laced with a trauma that is clear they haven’t had help processing. They need to develop more as characters and as friends before they should be paired together.

So… yeah. The Caleo relationship is, in my eyes, doomed to failure, or at least heavily flawed after taking the above points into account. Uncle Rick, as if seemingly aware of these criticisms, has put the relationship in a rocky place by The Tower of Nero, giving them the possibility of overcoming the above criticisms and their own flaws, or giving fanfic writers an out and pairing Leo with another character or have him single, but happy. Either way, in my opinion Caleo is a bad ship when it comes to how it was created, alongside the flaws and unfortunate implications it has.

While I can see some of the chemistry the ship has, you can’t just use a couple of moments where they get along as evidence that they belong together, especially with the above reasons. That’s like using a band-aid to cover a bullet hole without removing the bullet, stopping the bleeding, and preventing infection. If both characters and their relationship had been given more time to develop, I would understand how they would get together. 

[enduracarrotchips]

YouTuber AU

Hello welcome to Dating Scandal but with Twitter Involved (nightmare)

A little exposition here: 

Link, Zelda, Sidon, Revali, and Riju are the most popular group of youtubers on the internet and have a huge fanbase that likes to theorize, draw fanart, and write fanfiction about them. Disclaimer, I don’t actually interact with real-person fandoms myself lol there’s just too much potential for drama and misunderstandings & they’re always bound to end in a dumpster fire but that is sort of what this au is about so.

Impa, Mipha, Daruk, and Urbosa are family friends that appear in a lot of their videos/streams. 

(This is an art blog I swear)

enter vidcon 20XX

Link: 

blows stuff up/sets stuff on fire with a side of cooking vids and gaming

most are filmed outside, he does those challenges where you try to cook stuff with limited ingredients/materials

has the largest fanbase of all of them, but not the most…intimidating.

does a lot of collab videos, mostly with Impa, Daruk, and Riju because they have similar interests/channels, but Zelda appears in his videos and is seen filming and the stans read too far into it

simps. i’m pointing at you.

Most popular videos are “shield surfing on rock!—how I broke my leg” “can Daruk eat Impa’s motorcycle?” and “how to inhale ranch dressing.”

Twitter handle is @ arsonistslullabye because he’s a hozier fan

45m subs

Zelda:

theories, analyses, conspiracies, and the occasional e x p e r i m e n t

she once got link to eat a frog for 50 bucks.

most people argue that she’s better than more popular YouTubers because she actually has quality content to give to the world and she has a lot of defensive supporters

She used to get a lot of hate before Urbosa spoke up about it and scared the bejeezus out of everyone

has an actual posting schedule

“Happy Sunday everyone, it’s Zelda Hyrule and today we will be talking about cryptozoology and why blupees exist, you cowards.”

Twitter handle is @ zeldaofhyrule and she is pan. just so you know. One of those calm extroverts that mystify me to this day.

18m subs

Sidon:

fashion/life hacks. Like gourmet troom troom but if they were real people.

Has the 2nd largest fanbase

most of them are girls

Sidon has a boyfriend though, which he told everyone at VidCon a few years ago

cue the drama and shipping and the entire fandom trying to figure out who the boyfriend is. A well known reddit thread emerged that presented the common guesses being Link, Sidon, and Zelda.

“But it can’t be Zelda, Sidon’s gay.”

“I’m not in the fandom but I thought Zelda was a boy??”

“Did you just say Sidon? Is that a typo? Are you saying that Sidon’s dating himself?”

Sidon x Sidon became a fandom joke.

Don’t look at me I’m just setting up all the worldbuilding. every fandom has their weird dark sides and Sidon x Sidon is the Linkcest of the Sidon YT fandom.

Mystery BF is actually Bazz, a pretty inconspicuous guy who appeared in a few of his videos. This was confirmed a year ago, but everyone still ships him with other YouTubers because they’re convinced he was lying to throw them off his scent. He really can’t catch a break and this is why you should not ship real people.

Twitter handle is @ officialprincesidon

says “beguiling” a lot

21m subs ᕙ( ͡❛ ▿ ͡❛)ᕗ

Mipha:

Sidon’s sister, hasn’t posted a single video but just has the channel for show because she appears in so many of Sidon’s videos as a model for his makeup tutorials and whatnot

has 328k for that. Everyone loves her, she’s great. @ mimipha

Revali:

Link’s sworn rival

Link thinks they’re friends

He kept popping up in link’s Twitter threads and making snarky comments until zelda called him out for not even following link (so why was he stalking his acc) which kept the Twitter drama to a minimum

Revali was the catalyst of a few popular memes and that’s where most of his subs come from.

drags link into a few challenges that always get a ton of views because of how competitive they get

“ITS JUST ASININE” is a running joke that everyone tries to get him to say. His @ is itsjustasinine as well

Urbosa is the only person who can win an argument with him

5m subs and growing rapidly. newer to youtube than everyone else.

Impa:

Doesn’t have a channel she’s just a mutual friend of Mipha, Zelda, and Link

Rides a motorcycle, so she is used in a few of Link’s videos.

@ ihaveamotorcycle because she thinks having a motorcycle is a personality trait. the most unruly on Twitter when it comes to replying to fan’s stuff, leaking upcoming videos and generally causing chaos.

Mipha’s girlfriend. That’s how she met Zelda and Link.

Urbosa:

Is actually a model, but she has a ton of YouTuber friends because she’s known Zelda since birth.

when she entered the youtube community she didn’t realize she would be adopting like 15 children

5m subs. her videos are professional & related to her modelling career. @ urbosasfury

I feel like she would do unboxing vids. I’m not sure what she’s unboxing.

Daruk

Just a friend of Link’s, fun guy. yells a lot. once ate a rock and had no reaction.

people are scared of him for that reason

Riju:

yoga & gymnastics & “ha look at how flexible I am its eAsY” videos

you know the type

she also does reactions and is sponsored by save the sand seals charities which she is very enthusiastic about. She’s also Urbosa’s niece and the only minor in the gang (15). I like to think that the champions YT community is actually not creepy so everyone respects her a ton

doesn’t post frequently, she mostly appears in Link’s videos to jump out of airplanes or whatever. And sometimes Zelda’s if she’s interested in the topic. 500k subs, but she’s always really popular when she appears in Link’s videos.

VidCon:

In the months leading up to VidCon, some fans on the internet made a few discoveries: first of all, that the inside of Link’s house is painted green. This is a big deal because all of his videos are filmed outside either in his backyard or on trips that he and the brosquad go on to do…whatever bros do. explosions. idk. The point is he had some announcement about VidCon and filmed it inside. Only the wall and a potted plant were shown.

However, the colour was similar to the the shade of Zelda’s living room. Fans dug through years and years of old videos and found a clip of Zelda walking through a hallway, where there was an open door and a glimpse of a houseplant.

There were 2 types of responses to the theory:

“They could just be roommates guys calm down”

“and they were ROOMMATES?”

others pointed out that Link could just not have a house and had to crash in Zelda’s

Some guy on reddit claimed he had a botany degree and declared that the houseplants in the clips were not of the same genus. Normal people pointed out that the plant would have grown 4 years between the clips and would look considerably different.

#Zelink trended on twitter for a while and people posted other old clips from both of their channels and the frog video blew up again

Impa retweeted a post tagged as #zelink with “rofl” and later publicly apologized for causing confusion.

Fans noticed that in the “can a motorcycle drive over my arm” (it was clickbait he’s fine) episode 2 years ago, Link was eating out of a paper lunch bag with his name written on it in handwriting that a few people claimed to look like Zelda’s, leading people to believe that she had packed him a lunch.

However, this theory was shot down with the counterargument that Zelda can’t cook. although. i mean how much skill do you need to make a sandwich.

No one knows what tumblr is doing at this time

Zelda wore a scarf in her “Save the Sand Seals” video that matched identically to the scarf Link wore when he travelled to Hebra to film a shield surfing video, but it’s been debated wether it’s actually the same scarf or not.

Neither Zelda nor Link has spoken up about the theories, and besides Impa’s one slip on twitter, neither has any of their friends. Zelda received a lot of backlash for the assumption that she was dating Link because he has a lot of delusional fans that didn’t want her to “steal their man” or whatever the hell that type of fan would get mad about

Oh yea and bolson & karson run a zelink fanpage on twitter sorry I forgot about that

after that whole mess, everyone was even more anticipant of VidCon in the hopes that some of their questions would be answered.

The whole batch went to VidCon this year: Link, Impa, Daruk, and Riju are a gang while Sidon and Mipha go together and Zelda & Revali each go separately. Urbosa is there for supervision moral support

Zelda has always been much better at dodging questions that she doesn’t want to answer than anyone else, so her Q&A went without a hitch. When asked to confirm the rumours she said “which one?” and then moved on to the next question (without actually confirming any rumours).

Link is generally a more awkward person but eventually said that he had filmed the video in Zelda’s house because it was nicer and didn’t realize it would cause such an uproar. Fans were disappointed, but Bolson claimed he saw Link and Zelda exiting the hotel elevator on the same floor after Link’s Q&A session. No one believed him.

Fans went back to theorizing over who Link, Zelda, and Sidon were all dating, because apparently they can’t just be dating unknown people and have to be with other YouTubers

Sidon and Bazz got engaged about a week after VidCon, making at least 4 preteen girls cry

actually try 4 million

Sidon x Sidon made a brief comeback but Sidon spoke up about his fandom for the first time ever on twitter and told everyone that no, he was not dating himself. eventually, everyone settled down and accepted that none of them were in a relationship save for a few loud fans.

Link and Zelda still got the occasional “when will you tell us who you’re dating?” comment but most of them were joking and the people who still hardcore shipped them were generally frowned upon. Zelda’s popularity went up after VidCon and she regained the 200k subscribers she’d lost after the first theory dropped.

Two months after VidCon, Link posted a video titled “Zelda and I’s House Tour!” and gave around 45 million people a heart attack

as revealed in the video, they had actually been dating since they were 16 and everyone’s just a fool.

the potted plant is named Hestu.

[opaljm]

I didn't really want to put the other stats stuff here and clog up an already long post but I wanted you guys to see my top five posts which incidentally happened to all be fics! Do they surprise any of y'all?

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

scream your panties (m) – pjm

➺ pairing: jimin x female reader

➺ genres/tropes: fluff; humor; smut; minor angst; panhellenic college au ; established relationship ; halloween shenanigans

➺ warning/content tags: 18+; swearing (cuz issa fic by me), extremely inaccurate depictions of Greek life (I used PBP because I have friends from there and it’s the only one I feel safe making fun of); mutually jealous Jimin and Y/N who are in a deeply symbiotic relationship and are somehow the same person, sexualized Toy Story Halloween costumes, Y/N is prone to murderous fits of rage but so is Jimin (he just pretends he isn’t to look more civilized), haunted houses are scary (includes jump scares, scary themed rooms, and also taegiseok n yeonbin in creepy costumes), fighting n misunderstandings (gets scary for a sec but its quick like ripping off a bandage), smut: boob enthusiast Jimin, tons of breast play n nipple play, chest enthusiast Y/N cuz Jimin has nipple piercings 😏, Jimin likes to spank you both inside and outside the bedroom, hand job, unprotected penetrative rough sex (multiple times), Jimin n Y/N get randomly into the feels all the fucking time so if you hate intimacy this fic aint the one for you, copious marking/biting, spit play, panty thief Jimin returns (sorry but this is canon to my Jimins I can’t make him stop 🤡), big dick size king Jimin, creampies/pussy stuffing, blow job, sixty-nine action (yes they blow and eat out each other at the same time), fingering, multiple orgasms, riding, cock warming, showering together

➺ word count: 17.4k

➺ summary: As your midterms have ended and Halloween has arrived, you are looking forward to a pleasant time relaxing and enjoying the festivities at your sorority and Jimin's frat houses. Luck is not in your favor, though, because things keep going wrong like a trail of dominoes falling – the only upside to your slowly deteriorating day being that you get to end it with your boyfriend's delicious self between your legs.

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922 notes • Posted 2021-11-11 21:14:29 GMT

#4

cat nap (m) – pjm

➻ female reader x jimin

➻ hybrid/shifter au + jaguar/black panther!jimin + sand dune cat!reader + established relationship

➻ genres: minor angst, smut, fluff, romance

➻ length & status: 9k words; complete

➻ rating & warnings: 18+; nesting, pregnancy talk, slight breeding kink, if you squint there’s somnophilia, graphic descriptions of sex: cunnilingus, multiple orgasms/forced orgasms, unprotected/penetrative sex, mating/biting/claiming, sex toys  

➻ summary: Some where down the line, they had gotten too comfortable and Jimin resents that, especially when he wants so much more. When he unexpectedly runs into his girlfriend after not seeing her for weeks, he finally gets the chance to take their relationship to the next level. Not cat nap like kidnap, cat nap like sleeping.

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1076 notes • Posted 2021-04-16 02:00:56 GMT

#3

yours, truly (m) – jjk

⟶ pairing: female reader x Jungkook

⟶ rating: 18+

⟶ genres & tropes: angst, future smut; arranged marriage/marriage of convenience, enemies to lovers, scorned lovers with a past, second chance romance, featuring ceo!jungkook & music producer!reader

⟶ summary: Ten years ago, you had run away from your family to pursue your dreams of becoming an idol. Eight years ago, those dreams were turned into dust and you were forced to beg your family to take you back in. Now, as a part of their agreement for making you a member of the illustrious Min family once more, you were forced to do their every bidding, including marrying the man you hated the most of all.

⟶ warnings/content tags: tension and hostility between Jungkook and the reader, flashbacks, talk of being a runaway teen, alluding to family problems/drama, producer shenanigans, dramatic jungkook, petty reader, this chapter is sfw!

⟶ length & status: 13k words; in progress

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1817 notes • Posted 2021-05-04 07:57:42 GMT

#2

i. legend of the lamp (m) – jjk

➺ pairing: genie!jungkook x female reader

➺ genres/tropes: fluff; humor; smut; fantasy au; magic au; strangers to lovers

➺ warning/content tags: 18+; explicit sexual content: female masturbation (solo shower time activities, pro anal enthusiast y/n she wants it SOO bad but is very deep in denial); underwater sexual activities plz do not attempt at home you might drown (kissing, fingering, multiple orgasms, boob kink jeon makes his debut, he likes to bite and make it hurt but he also likes to kiss it better); sex in public (jungkook is an exhibitionist freak, y/n and jungkook give the ‘mile high’ club a new meaning, very mild food play, mean cocky jungkook shows up as expected, jjk's dirty talk is UNMATCHED, gross nasty jeon with the spit/licking kink, overstimulation, orgasm denial, the slightest bit of breath play/choking kink, impregnation kink is mentioned, possessive attention whore jungkook); sloppy cunnilingus with too much teeth tbh, finger fucking, there’s almost fisting but they both wimped out— there's always next time tho ;), forced orgasms, big dick hung like a fucking stallion jeon jungkook, unprotected sex but its fine cuz koo is a genie with fetus deletus powers, spanking, soft dom jk who degrades y/n like a CHAMP if it were a contest he would be winning a gold medal for it, jungkook likes to punish y/n until she can’t even think straight, standing up sex courtesy of strength demon jeon, praise thirsty competitive af constantly wanting validation jungkook, they both have a size kink let’s be real, reader has a strength kink throughout this entire fic she just wants to be manhandled and thrown around like she’s jungkook’s pretty sex doll, soft passionate sex, creampie, lovely aftercare from our cleaning fairy koo

➺ word count: 23k semi-edited but im too tired to actually do it properly :(

➺ summary: Jungkook has been serving his time as a genie for the last 2000 years, unfortunately stuck in a lamp for the last 200 years before he is woken from his slumber by a beautiful woman who somehow activates his lamp while making a wish that ends up letting him out. After eons of having to bend over backwards to make the desires of evil individuals from power hungry dictators to spoiled princesses come into fruition, he’s updated his contract to be more choosy over who the lamp allows to be his master. It comes to his great surprise that this woman was able to make the lamp work and that she only yearns to be loved and no longer be lonely. But all of the wishes he grants now have time constraints, another caveat he added to the contract, and he wonders what life would be like if he had never made that stupid rule. Because, as the week progresses, he finds himself falling deeper and deeper into her spell, pondering what it would be like if he never had to stop playing the role of her man. 

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3605 notes • Posted 2021-10-01 00:44:52 GMT

#1

nip it in the bud (m) – kth

➻ female reader x taehyung

➻ going to get a piercing au/completing bucket list au + my brother’s best friend au + tattoo artist!taehyung

➻ genres: smut, romance

➻ length & status: 10k words; complete

➻ rating & warnings: 18+; taehyung has tattoos and piercings, he and his big hands are illegal, tae's oral fixation is entirely out of control, nipple sucking/breast play, semi-public sex (? idk tbh), the pussy eating he does is sloppy and gross, squirting, nasty/messy sex, unprotected sex (wear a condom and be safe kids OR ELSE), riding, creampie, pussy stuffing cuz tae has a big dick (I don’t think you understand it’s GIGANTIC), multiple orgasms

➻ summary: You're not sure how you ended up here, but maybe a shitty ex and a horrible breakup had a hand in what placed you in front of the tattoo parlor. It was already a nerve-wracking experience, but what you never expected was seeing that the owner and artist giving you nipple piercings was your older brother's best friend you hadn't seen in ages. to make things even worse, he got fucking hotter.

See the full post

4608 notes • Posted 2021-05-31 19:50:56 GMT

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[shoichee]

GoMs + Kagami, Hanamiya, Teppei as Pokémon Trainers

Pokémon x Kuroko no Basket Crossover

Headcanons on KNB characters if they were trainers

For only the “Generation of Miracles” (plus Kagami), I wanted to show that they are prodigies in the pokémon universe by each giving them the appropriate specialty legendary/mythical pokémon respective to their anime counterpart abilities/personalities.

Also, as GoMs in the pokémon universe, I was careful to also choose some of their respective pokémon based on base stats and the consideration of type variety, unless a team had most pokémon sharing a type for a reason, in addition to already choosing pokémon based on their pokédex entries.

I have also given pictures of said pokémon suited to each KNB character below the cut.

Warning: spoilers on KNB characters, it’s a given

Kuroko Tetsuya 

his lack of presence would directly translate into the pokémon world pretty nicely and would make him pretty attuned to ghost pokémon floating about, but that won’t necessarily mean he’ll have a full team of ghosts

I feel like he would accidentally just pick up the mythical pokémon, Marshadow as a kid without knowing its reputation and would just let it follow him around like a buddy… and then they would become an official trainer-pokémon relationship later on // they’re both tiny and usually unnoticeable; they’d be best friends

he’d definitely have a Zoroark, since these pokémon require very strong bonds with their trainers, and they’re infamously known for their illusions and trickery; for Kuroko, he probably saw right through a Zorua’s (pre-evolution) tricks back in the day and then it became intrigued by him and joined him along the way before evolving into the Zoroark we see present day // this is a tribute to Nigou as well, since they’re both dog-like/fox?????

surprisingly, he’d have a Hatterene just trailing behind recently; Hatterenes hate extreme emotions emitted from humans and I’d feel like it would just be lured in by his dry personality

Hatterene’s color scheme is literally the same blue and pink like Kuroko and Momoi, so Hatterene is very much a Momoi who chases Kuroko around while he doesn’t mind it at all

his 4th pokémon, Vanilluxe, came to be when he spent hours hiding in the tall grass for a Vanillite (pre-evolution) to show up; he was willing to go out of his way to catch one because he wanted an ode to his love for vanilla milkshakes

all in all, he would be the trainer who is able to instantly connect and make friends with other pokémon around without even trying; ironically, he would have the most variety of typings in his team because of that

he’s the protagonist trainer who would always be the first to openly stand up against the villain teams and foiling their plans, but he would need the support of the other GoMs (cough) to take down the team bosses

he would definitely be friends with N (BEST franchise character)

he’s a “youngster” trainer like a “youngster joey” vibe KDJWORKWKW but like he’s pretty OP by the end of his journey

Kise Ryota

Cinderace with its hidden ability Libero is perfect for our blondie; Libero is an ability that allows the user to become that type of the move it just used until it uses a move of a different type, and then it’ll switch to that next type (I thought about Greninja with its Protean ability at first because it’s the OG ability and it's the exact effect just a diff name; but Cinderace’s design is a soccer motif and it reminded me of Kise in the old Teiko days)

Kise would very much be a renown model in the pokémon universe, and he’d idolize Elesa (from Pokémon B/W and B2/W2); both are blonde models too LOL (except she dyed her hair black in B2/W2)

so he’d have a Luxray (non shiny OR shiny, both suit him), because since he looks up to her so much and she’s an electric-type gym leader, he’d probably have an electric-type of his own

I would think he’d have a dragon-type pokémon like Haxorus to connect him with Aomine (a dragon-type trainer) since in the anime, Aomine was Kise’s mentor and role model in basketball; it would give him a fighting chance with Aomine if they ever faced each other in a pokémon battle

he would have a shiny Sylveon, and he would love to dote the ever living fuck out of it and feed it poképuffs (maybe from Murasakibara’s café LOL) and sing with it, and every time it sweeps someone’s team with its Moonblasts, he’ll cheer it on so much BDHWIRWI it also adds a certain connotation to his idol reputation as this “approachable guy” with his adorable Sylveon too

this guy has an idol status not just in the beauty/fashion industry, but also in the sports world (especially in Unova’s sports stadium in Nimbasa city)

he’d meet tons of other models and fashion icons like gym leader Nessa, champion Diantha, etc. WHEW JUST SAYIN

he would have his face plastered everywhere on trainer PR videos and even getting offers for some minor acting roles in Pokéstar Studios

one day, while he’d be at the studio, there was a whole commotion how the studio and the museum had their deliveries mixed up because the studio had the real meteorite while the museum had the well-made prop of a meteorite; and uh, it turns out this meteorite had the alien virus that pretty much had its DNA mutated into a Deoxys

long story short, being a very experienced trainer, Kise would manage to catch it after hours of chasing it in the wild areas nearby

over time, he and this particular Deoxys would come to have enough mutual respect for each other to be able to battle as a proper trainer-pokémon duo

that being said, he won’t resort to using it unless it’s life-threatening; note: he changes its Formes using a chunk from the meteorite in the studios he broke off (Deoxys [and its many forms] is further reference to his versatility as a basketball player)

Midorima Shintarou

as a man who seeks for good luck and fortunes he’d stack up on a Chimecho for sure and… 

Togekiss; he used to have its pre-evolution Togepi to solely to try to make it stand up while sleeping for good luck (according to the pokédex), and the more he kept trying, the more he made it attached to him and before he knew it, he had a fully evolved Togekiss // he’ll NEVER admit that he loves it to bits, though

this might be unexpected at first glance, but he’d have a Mega Absol; hear me out, it’s called the “disaster pokémon” according to its pokédex, however it is only named so because it warns others of disasters when it appears SO IT WOULD WARN MIDORIMA OF INCOMING BAD LUCK

he’d probably receive a Rowlet from Momoi as a gift from her laboratory, and he didn’t have the heart to abandon it; he’d evolve it to a Decidueye… and just… keep it (this pokémon is a reference to his no-miss shots)

ultimate good luck bringer: Ho-Oh ✨

would have the most “balanced” team out of everyone in terms of type-coverage (reference to him having the most coverage in skills for basketball, from shooting to absolute defense to having ball-handling skills)

he’d totally avoid Akashi’s Kadabra (pre-evolution of Alakazam)—who will be mentioned later down in the list—because it’s said to bring bad luck, as well as avoiding all the Ninetales because he doesn’t want to risk accidentally pulling off one of their tails and be cursed

he’ll avoid caverns as much as possible (but it’s impossible to avoid them all) because those are the habitats of Golbats (who will supposedly give bad luck if one bites you) but if there wasn’t a leeway for him, he will literally LATCH onto his Chimeco and keep his Togekiss and Absol out of their pokéballs to guard him LMAOOO

I would feel he would constantly strive to fill up his entire pokédex, so he’d be a pokémon master in training in a sense; he’s someone who wants to prepare himself for any situation and opportunity, so being a pokédex filler would always provide him an encyclopedia on potential pokémon to either stay away from or catch more of because of certain luck factors

make no mistake though, he’s a seasoned pokémon battler, don’t fuck with him

Aomine Daiki

an intimidating Garchomp would be his ace™️ pokémon, ummmm have you SEEN its base SPEED stat??? it’s a monster

we’re gonna go overkill and give this man a Mega Rayquaza just for the sole fact that he’d be the “ace” trainer of ALL ace trainers and veterans alike

however, because of his “lack of practice/training” like in the anime, he’d probably just stick with these two pokémon, since usually Garchomp already sweeps everyone’s teams without a sweat

homie is probably napping on top of one of the laboratory roofs (probably the one Momoi works in) or escaping to a nearby cliff or hill to relax and keep a lookout for any promising trainers that pass by him

is a trainer who pretty much kept one-shotting all the trainers throughout his journey in the region (aka that’s us protagonists when we play against NPCs)

he would also be that trainer who wiped the floor with the current champion so badly that he felt that all his “training” leading up to that moment didn’t even feel rewarding (plus there’s those countless trainer battles before where it didn’t feel thrilling), and so, he just left the league after, waiting for the day a sufficient rival could show up in his life

he’s definitely cleared the challenging battle systems of each region (probably back when he still had some passion for battling and had a good full team): Battle Frontier, Battle Tree, PWT tournament, Battle Manson, Battle Tower… you name it, he’d probably be done with most of them, if not, all

Murasakibara Atsushi

he’d have a Bewear, Appletun, and lots of variants of Alcremie’s just hanging around him

note: you should search up all the variations of Alcremies yourself, hint cough, it’s 60 variations total

maybe he’d have a Snorlax chilling nearby because it’s so huge

Murasakibara would be a Pokécafé owner AND HE’D HAVE HIS BULKY BEWEAR AND HIS SNORLAX GUARD THE SHOP, YOU CAN’T ARGUE WITH ME 

or he would UNLEASH his G-MAX forms of Alcremie’s

and he’ll just use his pokémon to make the tastiest poffins, poképuffs, and pokécurry

he’ll never bring out his final pokémon, Melmetal, unless it’s an absolute emergency and his shop is in danger

he would love Kuroko’s Vanilluxe, in a sense where he would always impassively joke about eating the ice-cream pokémon and Kuroko would just constantly hope he’s not being for real

he wouldn’t be motivated by ambitions like other trainers would have, he just wants to chill and loaf around all day; if someone pissed him off about he was a “weak” trainer or how they were becoming overly cocky when talking about their goals, he’d be right there smiling and ready to annihilate them | (• ◡•)|

Akashi Seijuro

Espeon would totally fit him as his first pokémon; its eyes are very reminiscent of his feline irises, and it’s tiny in size but a very powerful sweeper when set up right AND THEY’re ~calm~ while being capable of either sweet or very calculating later on / LIKE PET, LIKE OWNER

Tsareena; this one has a literal attitude of a queen and its pokédex is pretty terrifying in which one kick from its legs “leaves a wound in the opponent's body and soul that will never heal”... sound familiar?

Nidoking, cough I wonder why I picked this guy he’s a king, but jokes aside, it’s here to add more type variety to his team, and it’s mostly there to be a status inflictor (aka poisoning) and hazard setter with traps for his opponents… sound familiar with how he initiates his shogi strategies?

Mega Alakazam. that’s it. this pokémon has 5000 IQ like ?? would totally wipe the floor with Akashi in shogi if it tried

you thought Aomine had an overkill legendary, but Akashi has Hoopa, who’s capable of a Confined form and Unbound form, representative of his two contrasting personalities 

he’s an ambitious trainer aiming to become a Pokémon Master, and he’s one of those feared prodigies that all the region champions just lowkey sweat hearing about him coming to wreck their leagues apart

his pokédex would be damn near completed

he looks more into a pokémon’s utility and how it can fit into his strategies; it just turns out that most of the capable/eligible pokémon he ends up picking are psychic-types because they all tend to have extremely high intelligence to pull them off

Momoi Satsuki

Mega Altaria fits Momoi’s aesthetic of being cute, but very dangerous if you underestimate it, and I wanted a cute connection to Aomine who I primarily headcanoned to be a dragon-type trainer, so Altaria is a dragon-type pokemon that I picked out (perfect alternative would be Mega Gardevoir if she never met Aomine)

Blissey is a pokemon that brings happiness to anyone that eats their eggs, and it very much fits Momoi’s personality

Tapu Lele is a totem pokemon that has incredible knowledge, and is known to be able to outsmart any opponent during battle, referencing her pre-cognitive defense research abilities

she would definitely be constantly mistaken as a pokémon “Beauty” (yes that’s a trainer title), but in actuality, she’s training to become a pokémon professor as an assistant 

Momoi’s “professor specialty” would definitely be her researching about a pokémon’s current stats (plus their EVs and IVs) and would pinpoint their level of potential and thus, predict their growth (and the steps taken for a certain type of growth) // she’d probably become really famous in the world of competitive battling because a lot of trainers would try to approach her to help “train their teams”

Kagami Taiga

I think he would ironically have a Lopunny because it used to be Alex’s but she just left it in his care and now he has this prankster bunny that’s basically an Alex 2.0 to other pokémon in its vicinity ?? but it has hops like Kagami so

a hotheaded, short-tempered guy like Kagami would have an Incineroar (they… kinda look the same) 

Krookodile would be very much up his alley… its offensive stats are also not something to take lightly, especially when paired with moves like Earthquake and Foul Play

Kommo-o would be a pokémon that embodies Kagami’s personality very well: it seeks to battle only strong opponents for the reason to defeat the “darkness,” and its presence is more than enough to scare the weaker opponents away; Kagami has been mentioned as the “light” many times throughout the series, and his piercing gaze on the courts generate suffocating pressure on the opposing teams // it’s also a pseudo-legendary pokémon on the same base-stat caliber as Aomine’s Garchomp (hinting at their game against each other) ( ᐛ )

last one I’d find really amusing to give for Kagami would be Victini, the adorable mythical pokémon said to bring only victories for its trainer… and it’s a reference to his ascendance to the top of the Winter Cup after defeating all the GoM’s teams

oh yeah, I forgot Mega Lopunny existed so I’ll just attached that right below

anywho, so he’s a rising pokémon trainer who wants to become a pokémon master… but only for the battling part LOL like he doesn’t believe in “catching ‘em all” so to speak because he’d be someone who would believe in winning battles with the pokémon you truly bonded with; in other words, he’d probably only catch new pokémon if he feels a certain connection with them

but because of that, he doesn’t have much info on other pokémon besides his own, and it bites him in the ass when he has to try to figure out ways to take down opposing teams

reluctantly would team up with Kuroko after finding out many of the competitions require double battling but he doesn’t have a single strategy for it, and then Kuroko would pop out of nowhere and offered a hand to be his double battle partner until he learned how to double-battle on his own

spoiler alert, they totally start becoming travel companions in exploring the world together

of course Kagami would have battle strategies, but he isn’t like Akashi where he would actively look for the appropriate strong pokémon for his strategies; he makes strategies to accommodate his existing team

Kiyoshi Teppei

HE HAS A LUCARIO, NOT ONLY THAT A MEGA LUCARIO; they both seek for justice and they’re extremely loyal, and they both are able to read their opponents very easily 

HE ISN’T CALLED THE “IRON HEART” FOR NOTHING, I CAN SEE HIM WITH A SHINY METAGROSS JUST BEING AN OFFENSIVE TANK YET BEING ABLE TO SWEEP, JUST LIKE AN ACE WOULD

he would live a double life: a shopkeeper of his grandparents’ pokémon item/antique store by day, pokémon ranger and patroller by night

he would keep his local area safe (ง'̀-'́)ง

yes, I only see him as a steel-type trainer

he’d be so precious with his pokémon and meticulous in his care for them: he’d probably shine his Metagross everyday or brush out his Lucario’s fur, just because !!

and his pokémon would be fiercely protective of Teppei in return, mostly because they noticed he has bad knees and they don’t want him to strain them any further(;´༎ຶٹ༎ຶ`)

Hanamiya Makoto

no debate, he’d have a shiny Hydreigon… dude that pokémon is an absolute nightmare to level up and evolve, let alone tame, but back when it debuted in Pokémon B/W, it was the most OP pokémon out there // shiny variant of it because it has a similar color scheme to the Kirisaki Daiichi basketball team, and he’d probably have a shiny version just to flaunt it off and piss people off

Salazzle with a hidden ability Corruption, where it allows it to poison any pokémon regardless of type or ability; again, it’s to piss the trainers off in battle

and finally, a Dracovish; a person like him would totally have this inherently fucked up pokémon just for the sole purpose to disturb the hell out of his opponent trainers, but make no mistake: it’s an underdog sweeper 

look, he’s an admin of some sinister villain team and he has his other Kirisaki Daiichi starter players as his personalized grunts (they’re like a specific sect of the villain team; e.g. Shadow Triad or the Seven Sages of Team Plasma)

you might wonder, why don’t I give him a “spider” pokémon, since the webs are the analogy used to compare to his strategies in basketball? too many villains have Ariados in their teams and Galvantula is a friendly, fuzzy tarantula soooo it wouldn’t fit Hanamiya at all

I don’t think he would have any deep motive to be villainous other than to just enjoy people getting fucked over by his own deeds and actions; sometimes, it isn’t so deep

“it’s your boy, Guzma Hanamiya” if you get this reference I love you

End Note: “Mega” forms and “G-MAX” forms are not separate pokémon, but rather, temporary power-ups during battles; they are just shown to show the differences in appearances compared to their original forms when they transform.

[intoafandom]

Why I like Kevan Miller, Steven Kampfer, Trent Frederic, Torey Krug, Tuukka Rask etc and why I will continue to like them.

(Sorry this is soooo long but it’s the only way I can explain)

So last night I got an anon ask and the person was asking why I like Kevan Miller when he’s a republican and I mentioned how I would make a separate post explaining my reasoning better and now that I have the time and its no longer 3 am, now seems like a good time lol.

So I’m gunna give a backstory about the players above that I mentioned and why a lot of bruinsblr doesn’t like them (so people that may not be aware know the context of why people are upset/dont like them). Most of bruinsblr doesn’t like Miller or Kampfer because they’re republicans. Everyone on bruinsblr is allowed to dislike them if they choose to. I recognize I’m in the minority on this app when I say I like and support Kevan Miller and Steven Kampfer. People on here also don’t like Torey Krug for the same reason and because he follows/followed Trump’s twitter account (since trumps account got deleted, torey now follows the “trump archives” account). People on here don’t like Tuukka anymore because over the summer, during all the blm stuff in the bubble, Tuukka went on tv in the bubble for an interview with a hat that said “Boston police” on it (the interview also aired right after the Bruins Organization posted about how they stand against racism, so people ended up calling Tuukka a racist hypocrite.) Last night, people on here found out that Trent Frederic follows Trump supporters and republicans on social media, which is why he’s losing some fans on this app. There are probably more stories about other players that I’m not aware of as well but these will be the ones I’m focusing on for now.

I am NOT going to start talking about my political opinions or my position on social issues. My account is called IntoAFandom for a REASON. So I can escape the real world and go “into a fandom” and have some peace. That’s why i never reblog or like or post about any real world events or issues. I want my blog to be solely about things, fandoms, and people that I love and care about. I don’t wanna come on my blog and see how a bombing happened or if someone got shot or this president signed this executive order etc etc. i wanna come on my blog and fangirl about Bucky Barnes being a sweetheart with kids or how amazing Matt Grzelcyk is at “tight turns” etc etc. Hence the name “IntoAFandom.”

I’m getting a lot of questions as to why I still support these players and I’ll definitely answer those questions in this post. Just so my mutuals know where I stand on this.

Now obviously it would be super easy for me to just go “well the player is super nice so i dont care about their political views.” And while that’s partially true for me, its not the only reason. For me, the reason is much deeper than that. I’ve never mentioned or talked about or even said it out loud. I touched upon what I’m about to say in that anon ask I got last night, but I’m going to go into detail now. It’s kind of hard to explain and the only way I can describe it is to tell you about my hockey journey up until this point, and specifically the 2018-19 season.

So one day in April in 2018, I was on school vacation and I was very bored. There was literally nothing on tv. However, as I was scrolling through the channels, I saw that a bruins game was on. I had never really watched hockey before in my life and the only experience I could remember having with it was when my mom was obsessed with them in like 2013 and how she set up this whole contraption to try and watch a game when a snowstorm made us lose connection. So with nothing else on the tv, crippling boredom, and being a Massachusetts native, I put the game on. It was literally just starting and the national anthem was about to start. We were playing the leafs lmao and it was game five or six of the series probably. I cant really remember because I didn’t think I would care this much about hockey at the time of watching it. But what I do remember was how CREEPY Tuukka looked😂 He was just standing there alone with a huge spotlight on him, head down, wearing these huge pads and looking straight up terrifying. I literally started laughing because of how creepy he looked. And then he put his cool ass mask on and right there I knew he was my favorite player. And to this day he is still my favorite. Tuukka was the first hockey player I EVER knew and could remember by name. I gotta admit, at first I thought his name was “Tuuk Arask” because that’s what it sounded like whenever the announcers would say it, specifically Jack Edwards lol. But then I was like “wait is it Arask or Rask” and after looking at his jersey like 3 games later I finally realized it was actually Rask lol. And I was like “Tuukka Rask. So freaking creepy lol. He’s my favorite.” I also have to mention that I’ve always been a sucker for people that play positions that no one else wants to play. Like for example, when I first started watching football in like 2014, my first ever favorite player was Stephen Gostkowski because he was the kicker. He was super good and he was instantly my fav. That’s what Tuukka was like for me. This huge, tall ass, creepy ass, goalie who was playing super well. How could i NOT like him. I didn’t really bother to learn any other players on the bruins team since they got eliminated in the second round. I remember saying to my mom “I don’t want them to be out. I wanna learn more.” I wanted to know more about the game and 6 games, or however many it was, wasn’t enough. So for some reason, I followed them throughout the offseason and in late September/early October I started watching a ton of their older games on YouTube. Not super old obviously, but games from like 2013-2017 ish. Just whatever I could find. And it was so interesting. I tried to only watch games where they actually won so I wasn’t wasting my time lol, but not having to worry about the score helped me start learning the game and some of the rules, like what an icing was for example. So then preseason games started and I got more into it. And then the beginning of the 2018-19 season started. I still didn’t really know any players besides Tuukka, even though I was watching YouTube games. The YouTube ones were more for me to learn the game and the rules rather than players (however, looking back, I did notice that Kevan Miller was a freaking beast, but I just didn’t acknowledge who he actually was. I just saw a player going absolute sicko mode and being like YEEEEAAAAH). The second player I could actually remember by name was Danton Heinen. I noticed he was playing really well and I was like omg who is that and I learned his name and he became one of my favorites with Tuukka. Next was Anders Bjork. I remember I was texting my friends and was trying to make it seem like I wasn’t a complete amateur at hockey knowledge, so I was like “hey guys, Bjork is back in the line up😃” and so I always remembered his name. Next was Ryan Donato because he was literally AWAYS smiling. Every time he was on camera he was SMILING. I loved it so much he was like a little bean. And so he was one of my favorites and i had a top three with him, heino and tuuks.

Now I was watching games and slowly learning important names like Chara, Bergeron, Marchand etc but it wasn’t really on my radar to actually learn all the players because I hadn’t even done that with the patriots who I had been watching and loving for yeeeears. But that was until I decided to watch a behind the b episode. And I was HOOKED. I instantly began to love and care about every single player on the roster. This was in like February of 2019. And that’s when I started trying to name everyone on the team, including their numbers. I made it a mission. I remember writing out lists in math class because I was so bored and would rather try to memorize hockey players. And that’s when I found bruinsblr. It was march by the time I started to post hockey stuff. And i made an instagram account so I could started editing them. I’ve had this blog since 2014 and its seen many phases, but march of 2019 was when I changed it into a mainly bruins blog. And I remember not knowing what “bruins lb” was and i never wanted to tag it because I thought it was like a club or something that I would be intruding on😂 So I started posting and reblogging bruins stuff and posting sucky bruins edits on here and on my insta account. And I started watching every single behind the b episode from every season and I was literally obsessed with the team. And then Donato got traded and i was heartbroken cuz I loved him and I was like Coyle is gunna have to wow me to get me to like him and he DID and i LOVE HIM. But then I decided to have a top five instead of a top three. And it was Tuukka, Krug, DeBrusk, Pasta, and Marchy. They were the players I noticed the most. And Marchy started LICKING people how could i not choose him😂 So then the playoffs come and we beat the leafs in game 7 AGAIN (and I literally missed the first two periods because I was at my confirmation) But I finally understood all the memes about the leafs and I finally understood hockey and hockey culture by this point. I knew the rules, the players, the memes, literally everything. And then we make it to the finals and get lil nas x singing old town road before game 1 and we get JD wearing that stupid hat😂 and the two people from The Office (one of them wanted the bruins to win and the other wanted the blues) and it was all just amazing for me. Then we lost and i was devastated. And we had to see pictures of CMac sobbing on the ice and JD sitting alone in his stall crying and all of them were so sad and after that journey we just went through i was fvcking crying too. We didn’t win, but that 2018-19 season is SO special for me.

The people on this roster (minus gemel smith and lee stempniak) are EXTREMELY special to me. They TAUGHT me hockey. They turned me on to an entirely new culture. I got to experience my first real bit of hockey. I got to experience EVERYTHING about hockey with them (besides the cup) in this ONE season of hockey. I saw the preseason games in china, the halloween visit to to the hospital, Chara bringing pies to the homeless, them buying toys for kids in the hospital at Christmas then visiting them, the new years game outside against the hawks, trade deadline crushing my heart, every round of the playoffs, players pushing through crazy injuries, loving players, despising other teams, all the memes, all the jokes, all the players. Everything. The 2018-19 season is SO incredibly special for me because it’s the first time I ever experienced real hockey and watched an entire season. The people on that roster mean so much to me because of that. Now take a look at the names on that roster. Rask. Krug. Miller. Kampfer. Frederic. They all helped me experience my first year of hockey. Freddy in his first freaking game, getting into a fight😂 Miller and Kampfer were BEASTS on the ice. Krug being a SPECTACULAR little defenseman, quarterbacking the pp and sticking up for himself and SLAMMING thomas. Tuukka Rask being the brick wall. There is no way that I could ever dislike the people on that roster unless the did something suuuuuper bad. I don’t know if you would call it hero worship or whatever, but those people on that roster are so fucking special to me. Even ones like JFK and Vaak and Colby that didn’t play that many games. They still made an impact for me as a hockey fan. THAT is the main reason why I will never stop liking and supporting tuuks, krugger, kampfs, millsy, or freddy. Everyone on that roster has a special place in my heart and I’m not going to let their political views change or tamper with the incredible experience they gave me during that 2018-19 season. I wont ever love another team as much as I loved that specific roster. And no one is going to change that for me. I dont care about their political views or whatever. For me, the experience and the feelings they gave me trump anything i may or may not disagree with. That roster is so special to me, I cant bring myself to dislike any of those people. I will always like those players, no matter how republican or democrat or whatever. Political views dont matter to me when it comes to those players.

Now besides all of that and the experience they gave me, I do believe that they’re still good people even tho they may be republican. I wanna start with Tuukka because it literally doesn’t make sense to me. Tuukka is not even AMERICAN. I dont think he cares that much about American politics since im pretty sure most his family lives in Finland. People got mad at him for wearing a Boston police hat. But I think those people are forgetting that Tuukka has been in boston for soooo long. There have probably been multiple occasions where the police had to help him or the team for some reason or another (they are technically famous after all). Tuukka wearing a hat that says Boston Police doesn’t make him a bad person. He was probably just showing support to the people that helped support HIM as well as his family and teammates. I follow Tuukka on insta and he literally NEVER posts anything political. Probably because NEVER actually posts ANYTHING at all lol. Tuukka had been my favorite from the start and theres almost nothing he could ever do that would make me dislike him.

As for the other 4, and any other players on the team that may be republican (honestly i bet most of them are because 1) most hockey players are and 2) a lot of the guys are christian/catholic and most christian/catholic people are republican as well) I choose to believe that political opinions dont make you a bad person. I like to believe that it depends on the circumstances for every individual. Now I’m not gay or black or anything. Im an 18 year old, straight white girl. So obviously i dont know what its really like for someone to hate or disagree with my race, sexuality, etc. I saw someone say (sorry I forget who it was) that they keep thinking “well what would that player say about me because im gay. What would they actually think about me. I cant support them.” And honestly that’s extremely valid. I never thought about it that way before. So if Kevan Miller for example was out here posting a bunch of homophobic stuff like “i hate gays” or “gays are all stupid” or anything like that, then yeah my opinions on him would probably change in some way. But I follow him on insta and i know the stuff he post about. I have NEVER seen him say anything like that. Ive never heard any bruin say anything like that. From what I’ve seen, they all seem like super nice, sweet, supportive people when they’re off the ice. (I think it’s also important to mention that I follow EVERYONE on the 2018-19 roster. I follow all of their instas. Most of them dont have twitter, but I follow all the ones that do. It’s part of the whole “that roster is incredibly special to me” thing). I choose to believe that following republicans or being one yourself doesn’t automatically make you a bad person, especially when you consider the different circumstances that every individual is under as humans. We all experience different things and that always plays a role in how you act or the opinions you have or the people you support. Someone’s political opinions have never stopped me from liking people. Ive clearly shown that I don’t mind republicans at all, but that doesn’t mean im going to dislike democrats either. Most of the actors/ singers that i like are democrats. And it just happens that most of the athletes i like are republicans. The political stuff doesn’t matter to me. I just dont want it being slapped in my face 24/7. I dont care if you’re a republican or democrat as long as you aren’t constantly talking to me about politics or social issues or trying to change my mind on stuff. Hopefully you can try to see my point of view on this and UNDERSTAND why I like them. Again, I’ve never told my hockey story to anyone so please don’t try and invalid my feelings about the season or the players.

Please, I beg, please don’t comment on this calling racist or something. Please dont try and change me mind. Please dont tell me i need to educate myself. I know WHY i like these players. I know where they stand politically and who they support. But these players are too special to ME for me to actually give a sht about if they like trump or not. Honestly tho, feel free to give your opinion (especially if you’re gay or black or anything) cuz i dont mind hearing other standpoints as long as you aren’t mean about it or try to change my mind. If i change my mind, which i probably wont, I want it to be on my own terms. Please remember that we ARE still a hockey family 💛🖤💛

(Also I’m NEVER talking about this again. If anyone ever asks or something like this comes up again im just gunna link/ reblog this post)

(Also, thank you to whoever made it this far and actually read all of that. ESPECIALLY if you’re someone that doesn’t agree with me. Its good to hear multiple standpoints on this stuff.)

[shiroganeryo]

D.Gray-Man Tag!

I got tagged by my friend Violet to hop into this little game she made, and there are few things I love more than babbling about DGM, so let’s go! The rules are to tag three people to get the game going, so I’ll do it at the start because this will get looong. I’ll tag @14th-melody, @metzzi and @rudimentor0x0. Here’s the blank post. Sorry if you have already done it, I might’ve missed the posts ;;

⭐ What year did you first get into DGM? Hmm, actually, that’s a hard question because I didn’t get into it right away? If memory serves me right about what grade I was in high school when that happened, I was 15 - so, 2008. Pull a chair, I’ll tell you how that went. It was actually a recommendation from a friend of my best friend; we weren’t particularly close, I just knew he and I had a similar taste for anime/manga and I was looking for getting into a new series... but I wanted it to be worthwhile. So I asked my bestie if her friend wouldn’t give me a rec. He recommended me D.Gray-Man, and just like I do before watching any series, I watched the first opening to get an overall “feel” of it and I quite liked it: cool aesthetic, music was dope, characters were nice-looking. But, for some reason, I didn’t watch it and eventually forgot about it.

Then, one day on my way back home from school, I stopped by a nearby newspaper stand since here they also sell manga. They were all very cheap at that time, so I would often look for new volumes of the titles I was collecting (my allowance was enough to buy two or three!). I saw DGM’s first volume there, and went “oh! It’s that one series he had recommended me! I’ll take it and finally give it a shot.”

I fell in love.

I really liked it at first, but the point where DGM completely won my heart was during Lala’s arc. I had never cried with a manga before. 

⭐ Who’s your favorite character? This is probably very unoriginal, but it’s Allen! At the start I was very lukewarm about him, but as time went on, I felt like I could relate more and more to that kind-hearted boy and he became my role model. DGM has been with me through some of the worst of my life, and Allen’s resolve to keep going, keep walking, no matter how hard things were for him was what motivated me many times in past. It still does. Allen also taught me to be kinder and through him I realized being there for others makes me truly happy. Sadly, I also share with him the same trait of being unable to truly see how appreciated I am and all the good I bring others just for being there... But I’m working on that! He became the first character I felt like I could fully relate to, and I was surprised - but still very happy - to realize that, now that I’m an adult with more experience and maturity, I feel like I can understand him even more and better than before. Our connection didn’t wane with time, I feel so much closer to him now. He’s very special to me.

Standing at the second spot - because it’s also fair I would mention her -, is Miranda! I always say that if Allen didn’t exist, Miranda would be my number 1 since she stands so close to him hahaha After him, she’s another character I deeply relate with. My self-esteem isn’t the best out there so I’m quick to think I’m worthless or useless, just like her. Even so, she wouldn’t give up. Every time I felt like giving up because of auto depreciation, I would think “Miranda would try again, she would work harder”.

It’s like the two of them were walking me through the steps so I could move forward and keep doing my best.

⭐ Who’s your least favorite character? I’m going to say Chaozii. But, before we get to the usual “Chaozii slander” we’re used to doing in this fandom, let me elaborate. It has nothing to do with him not siding with Allen. As much as I love Allen, I know we’re able of sympathizing with his ideals because as the readers we have a plethora of information on his motives; if not for that, we would probably take the same stance as Chaozii has taken about him.

What riles me about Chaozii is that, unlike all of the characters, his mindset is either black or white, good or bad. Everyone seems to have a perfect mix of both, showing many facets just like, well, real, imperfect people. Chaozii is the only one who doesn’t have that. Being simple-minded is not a bad trait, but when that clouds your judgement, then it turns into a bad thing.

It all fell apart when he snapped at Allen when he refused to kill Tyki. That particularly bothered me a ton, even if I understand his feelings. Chaozii, who thought it was wrong and cruel to kill humans and was grieving for his lost comrades, was fine with killing a human whom he wasn’t even sure if was being forced to do things or not. Do you see the issue here? Chaozii never feels to me like he’s striving to do the right thing in order to bring justice, but instead, because he wants revenge.

I hope he does get to learn one thing or two in the future. He has potential to be a great character; but he needs a “redemption” first.

⭐ Who’s your favorite general? Tiedoll! Although I like all of them for different reasons. I really love Cross and differently from what some people think, he did care for Allen and I love their rather dysfunctional relationship. He’s a much deeper character than just a womanizer full of fishy shenanigans. He’s also really badass: former scientist, user of magic, (former) wielder of both an Innocence of his own and another person’s (Grave of Maria). I just happen to love Tiedoll a liiiittle more because I can’t take this guy! He’s just so sweet, and his doting nature makes him both funny and lovely. General Sokalo is really cool and all, but I feel like he’s just a cool guy to me. On a side note, General Klaud could step on me and kill me and I’d thank her. I hope we get to learn more about her Innocence sometime.

⭐ Who’s a character you would get along with? I would love to say it’s Allen, but he’s someone really hard to get close to. If I think about the characters I’d like to befriend because of shared traits or interests, I think I could get along well with Miranda, Krory, and Marie. The first two because they’re two softies who just happen to be really awkward, I feel like I would probably befriend them after trying to comfort them too often. And, the latter, because I’m a person who likes calm company whom I can have honest talks with.

⭐ What kind of innocence would you have? I honestly have no idea. If I had to pick one from the ones we already have, I think I would go with the Dark Boots. Being able to fly and maneuver in mid-air would be a dream come true, I feel the happiest when the wind blows against me. If I have to think of something “for me” specifically, I think I would like a long range Innocence. I particularly like firearm-like weapons like guns, so maybe a gun or dual pistols? Yeah, I think I’d really like the dual pistols.

⭐ What’s your favorite ship? Ah, to be in the DGM fandom is to be a multishipper; yet this is the part where I always get nervous at because my favorite is a rarepair. But!!! I’m building up the courage to be more open about (and less self-judgmental of) the things I like. It’s Allen x Miranda. I don’t really know when it started; from what I said before, you already know they’re both my top favorite characters and very special to me, so I naturally loved it when I saw them sharing screentime. When I realized it, I was looking at them and thinking “they would make such a cute couple together”. It just kinda happened.

To keep this short, there’s this blog I really like explaining about this pair’s dynamics. I think they have a great dynamic together and much potential. They could very easily have a wholesome relationship based in lots of patience and mutually covering the other’s weaknesses and helping them become someone better. These are the best kinds of relationships imo. I hope to share some of my headcanons for them (and even writing, hopefully!) sometime in here. I always picture Allen being older, so that gives me some free room for creativity; it doesn’t look like he has time for romantic love right now, and I don’t really feel comfortable with him being a minor for this ship, so both things go hand in hand.

Honorable mentions go to Link x Allen (again, older!Allen), Yulma and LaviLena, as I also get super happy when I see these particular shippings. 

⭐ What’s your least favorite ship? I actually have some, but it goes against my policies to publicly (consciously) say negative things about certain things if I can help it. I know I’m allowed to have opinions, but you never know who can stumble upon it and what I dislike can be something that makes someone really happy, you know? I tend to stay silent about such things when it comes to something as harmless as shippings.

So, I think I can say I’m accepting of everything as long as everyone respects each other! And, of course, if it isn’t distasteful (as in, illegal).

⭐ What branch would you want to be part of? We’ve only seen the European and Asian branches properly before but even if there aren’t many choices, this is still a hard question; I think both have lots of good things going for them. I think I would probably want to settle with the Asian Branch! I love how lively the atmosphere is and I also feel like there are way less science division shenanigans in there... Sorry, Komui. 

⭐ What’s your favorite arc? I have three! The Rewinding City arc came right after Lala’s arc - that had touched me a lot -, bringing in even more feels. It introduced Miranda and at the blink of an eye, made me care so much about her. The first activation of Time Record after she protected Allen, followed by his thanks to her hit so hard; I get really emotional talking about it. It was such a great, yet touching moment. I think everyone can relate to that; being worthy of receiving gratitude for something they did for someone.

Then, there’s Lulu Bell’s Invasion of the Black Order arc, followed by the appearance of the Level 4 Akuma. I can’t express into words how great the flow of the elements are there. The plot is focusing on multiple characters with their own background dramas happening, all at once, yet none of it feels out of place. Everyone gets their moment, everyone contributes to the big picture (saving the staff and defeating the Akumas). It all felt like one big collective effort of several parts uniting forces, no one was more or less important than the other. It was expertisely done.

And the last mention goes to the Searching for A.W’s arcs (Saying Goodbye to A.W also included). These arcs are being extremely painful but, at the same time, also extremely rewarding to go through. For the first time ever, we’re seeing Allen give in to his wants and acknowledge his feelings; he’s not honest with himself very often, and seeing him actually admit that he still wanted to go on - for himself -, that he still wanted to hold onto hope was something that I suddenly realized I had always wanted to see him do. It’s like I had been waiting for so long. Allen is growing up, and I’m loving to see the part Johnny and Kanda are playing in this. I could talk all day about how happy it makes me, to feel this much hope in the midst of such a difficult situation these arcs are covering. It captures very well the essence of D.Gray-Man imo: the bittersweetness of the hardships of life, and the good things it makes us realize we have had all along. The people we have by our side. The will to continue moving forward because we still have something we love and want to fight for.

Whew, I expected this would get long but guess I got too carried away; those were amazing questions to answer to! If you read until now, you have my most sincere gratitude and appreciation. I wish you have a lovely day! 😊

[retphienix]

It's been 6 years :)

On March 30th, 2015 I decided I wanted a gaming side blog. (so we're early, but shush, it's the month for me)

I didn't know what I'd use it for exactly, but I had ideas- something I always have even if most of them only get as far as daydreamin' or writing out before closing them :P

For proof on the lack of direction the blog initially had- the March 30th date is the anniversary of my first post, an in-depth and lengthy review of Dragon Warrior Monsters for the GBC.

If you know the blog then you know "Extremely long and in-depth reviews" aren't the norm around here. As a matter of fact, that first post is the ONLY one I've done!

The closest I've come to ever repeating that would be the (word of the day) Directionless video I put out on Hades to get a grip on the concept of making videos, but that wasn't nearly as much of a 'review' as that first post is.

Tangent, definitely planning on trying my hand at videos some more for the foreseeable future. Probably not gonna use the tagline Full Impressions that I tossed as a whim for the Hades video but yeah- I'm excited to try my hand at a few videos :) tangent over.

It didn't take me long to come up with what I'd like to do for the blog though :)

A few months later I liveblogged a challenge run of FFT where I used only Ramza- a solo run. - Which maybe only happened because I tried a nuzlocke run a year prior on my main account-

(Nuzlocke | FFT challenge run)

Thanks to that haphazard liveblog experiment I started to realize a couple things which became the primary motivators behind this blog.

1) I LOVE sharing experiences. No brainer, I'm sure, but being able to share my experiences, and compare them with others' experiences, and just that mutual sharing is uplifting and feels good to do.

2) Liveblogging is an EXCEPTIONAL motivator to buckle down and play all those games I said I'd play (cue everyone laughing because I'm still way behind and have an immeasurable backlog).

But I mean that, on both respects. I have plenty of motivators toward the blog today, but if I were to be concise it's pretty much "It's easier to beat games if I liveblog them- otherwise I get distracted and play other games" and "I love sharing experiences and thoughts with people about my favorite thing- games."

Since 2015 I've tackled around 70 games as full playthroughs, and an untold ton as one offs or just to ramble about for a bit.

I've had a lot of highlights over the years, and I don't talk much about it as an overall experience so I thought for the anniversary I'd try to do just that. Not everything- I can't say I have photographic memory that would bring all of it up without prompting after all :P But whatever comes to mind as I browse some of my old stuff- as well as some thoughts on what I'd like to see in the future.

It's gonna be a bit self-centric I assume as I type this preamble to it, so let me say outright that this blog wouldn't be half of what it is without all the people who've given it the time of day over the years.

From recommending games they love or appreciate, to comparing thoughts, to offering kind words for analysis I've done over the years, to pointing out when I'm dumb and misread a situation :P- to, yes, even the people who decided "Fuck this guy's ramble" and deleted my captions before reblogging my gifs way back during Hamtaro (Of COURSE I remember that! It's amusing lol).

This is better because of others, because of the interactions and the people I've gotten the chance to chat with or befriend. It's just a liveblog more or less, my own little bit of fun I toss out for myself if for anyone- so seeing others enjoy this or that from the work I put into sharing my experiences or thoughts is always a joy in itself :)

Anyway, onto selfishly rambling about some tidbits of the past :)

Also sorry but no, opted to not shove a ton of photos in, it does have a handful of links to old posts though :P

This'll be disorganized as heck as I'll add to it over time before I feel it's worth posting (or the tumblr post editor becomes a hassle and more or less forces me to).

First~

FFT Solo Ramza Challenge: Considering it was roughly the first thing this blog has done, it's also something that's stuck in my head a lot more clearly than most of the other stuff I've done to be honest lol.

In truth, this is partially because FFT is my favorite game, bar none. But it's also because the whole experience was pretty new to me. Prior to it I had really only done one self-imposed-challenge that wasn't requested by the game in some manner and that was a nuzlocke run of Blue version.

So adding a challenge to my favorite game was a fantastic experience!

Notes I just wanted to say today about that run: If anyone enjoys FFT I honestly recommend giving it a shot for the unique story it lends itself to. I do recommend skipping the rules until after the second battle but that's up to YOU to decide.

My first post on the subject is me complaining about spending 4 hours grinding out the second fight and, despite hyperbole being my natural state, that was NOT hyperbole.

It DID take 60~ restarts to beat. It DID take 4 hours. The reason is that that 2nd battle is RNG as HECK, you HAVE to have Delita do some meaningful actions, you HAVE to have the enemies miss and make poor plays, you damn near HAVE to crit a few instances to save yourself from taking too much damage.

It's a numbers game to the extreme, so I wouldn't fault anyone for 'cheating' and skipping the 2nd fight for the ruleset lol.

The memory that stands out the most for that run is actually isolated in a post in which Ramza (Purrick in this run) talks like a total badass as just ONE DUDE running into a room full of enemies. I just think on that as a great encapsulated view of what it was like. The run started off face grindingly difficult, but because FFT is a game that offers so much freedom to the player it was extremely easy to 'break' the game into making Purrick overpowered as hell.

That's something I love about some tactical RPGs, I love having the ability to play smart so that I can play stupid later on, and breaking the game into making him one shot god is certainly a good payoff for playing smart early on :P

RetQuick: I miss RetQuick, it was primarily a short experiment I did in 2015 where I'd play a game for a short span of time (REALLY short, like 10-20 minutes) and record that for the purpose of making gifs and saying a short piece on what I thought.

It's one of those formats where the purpose was pretty shallow- but had a reason. I wanted to try making some gifs with some tools that existed online, so I made an excuse to do just that.

I also wanted to play a TON of games, usually through emulation on my sister's PSP, and this let me do that.

These two minor goals came together and so I spent a while making RetQuicks which were honestly more fun to make than they had any right to be. I mean the gifs were tedious but the playing? The thought sharing? The end product ocassionally having more appeal than just a photoset? It was fun.

I'm thinking whenever I have trouble picking a game for the blog I'll revisit the format... sorta.

I already reused it for a short stint to show clips I had no plan on expanding into a playthrough, but that died as well as it was too similar to Tidbits posts (another tag I no longer really use).

My thought is to rebrand retquick as something of a tryout for what game comes next. Play a handful of my backlog games for an hour or so each and say some thoughts before saying which one I'll continue as the main game for that period of time.

Old Tag Stuff: One of those things that only sticks to me since I made the decisions but it's always funny for me to look back on my old posts because I was apprehensive as hell toward making my posts visible. The reason my early playthroughs on the My-Tags page are variants of Ret instead of just "The name of the game so people can find this post" is because I felt like a liveblog would just spam the tag to hell-

Something I don't remotely feel bad for doing anymore.

So I avoided getting any sort of spotlight for quite a while on the blog for little reason.

Why Retphienix?: This is just a dumb thought I wanted to share and I'm sure I've said before.

It stands for retro!

Yeah!

Ain't that dumb and also not a real shorthand? lol

I think I have some sort of deer in headlights anxiety towards naming things, I mean do you think I think Full Impressions is a good summation for a video? I don't. But perhaps that's overshadowed by the other inexperiences and anxiety driven decisions that had- doesn't matter.

Retphienix is Retphienix because I sat there in 2015 and thought "Well... what do I name an alt account?"

My main is Redphienix, which yes, is ALSO a terrible name AND is misspelled. But it's that because of sentimental reasons. As a kid I misspelled Redphoenix when making my gamertag (I knew how to spell Phoenix back then as well, I was too excited about xbox live and misspelled it) and it's become something of a sentimental misspelling.

So I wanted to make a mix on that for my game blog, but I had no idea what. In the end I thought "RetroPhienix? I don't know. Retphienix is closer to Redphienix. I'll do that" and so it was done.

And just like how Redphienix is both bad and misspelled but exists because of sentimental reasons- Retphienix has acquired the same 'flavor' in my eye lol.

Aspirations for the blog: I have no immediate ramp up plans or road map or whatever, and in truth I'll be happy if the blog stays just as it is forever- up until tumblr ends- I cry over lost posts- and I reopen it on another platform.

But I do have blurry half-considered daydreams that I'd like to see happen for the blog through some hard work or shifts on my part.

One is something I'm already doing kinda, hence my embarrassing means of bringing it up a lot lately. Videos- I want those. I wanna make some looks back on series people don't talk about that I enjoy, I want to make videos sharing my thoughts on games I beat for the blog (like what full impressions kinda was, but I don't think they'll have a unified name from here on out). Maybe retrospectives, but mostly when I think of making a video tied to retphienix or me in general it's me looking at a game that said something to me, and saying it louder with my own interpretations on it.

You know the kind, videos where they talk about a video game but not the whole thing- just a singular message they really heard loud and clear from it intentionally or not. I dig those and I know I end a lot of games having plenty to say that could be directed into such a format.

We'll see.

And I'm along for the ride on that one as well- currently I'm keeping my eyes on whatever is directly next, which happens to be "I plan on playing Omori, if it clicks as something to talk about I would like to take a shot at that in a video too!"

The other is that I'd like to build a small community. Wouldn't know the first thing on doing that in a modern sense, but just a little online friend group to chat with and play games together. Something that could open up multiplayer and coop experiences being better shared on the blog and would just in general expand my gaming to what it used to be back on the 360 when I had a large group to play with.

Since the 360 era ended I've pretty much closed off- stopped playing competitive games due to lack of interest- and slowed down to playing all games either solo, with randoms (and no mic usually), or with my cousin. It's a rare instance when I play with some good people like @gamesception or another friend of mine, John.

When I diverted from playing competitive games nonstop toward other genres I didn't intend to also cut out all my online gaming buds, it just kinda happened, and I never really put any effort into rectifying that.

So more or less I'd like to one day sit down and work on a discord server, and then buck up and put the leg work in to make some gamin' buds again, but that's such a vague concept anymore.

Sounds all sad and what not but it's more ambivalent, I made decisions that

changed how gaming worked for me after the 360 and this is just where it landed for better and worse- I'd just like to see if I can make it a little better :P

General things I think when I think retphienix: Honestly? I think of how much fun I've had over the years and how thankful I am to have had an outlet that encouraged me to explore more of the medium.

I REALLY love games. I went to college for games, I've written LEAGUES about games, I've played countless games, my childhood was games, my adult life is games- games games games yada yada yada.

So when I think of retphienix I think of how without it I probably wouldn't have explored a lot of the corners of gaming that I have.

I genuinely, and I mean this, might not have sat down and beaten FF7 for myself and would have considered the amount I played as a kid to be enough.

I might not have played Chrono Trigger yet, and I KNOW I wouldn't have played Chrono Cross, and I'm happy as hell to have played both of those. CT was a mind blowing moment for me that showed me just how good an RPG can be, and CC gave me miles to think of in terms of innovating an RPG and how beholden to the narrative a sequel should be (I don't feel CC should have been chrono at all lol).

I DEFINITELY wouldn't have given New Vegas another chance. And I know I'm a sourpuss on NV, I've been that way since I maxed my achievements on the 360 for it, but replaying it really did reveal to me how exceedingly negative I was being.

My memories had become "It's brown and a boring location >:(" and "The factions all suck and it doesn't do anything with the idea of bad factions >:(" and became "It's... a little brown guys, not a big fan of the area" and "They didn't do enough with exploring the gray factions" while adding "Wait. This is pretty damn fun. And 90% of the additions are stellar. And I forgot about Dead Money, my favorite dlc in any game ever with a story that tears at my heart every time I think of it, NV good actually?"

Faxanadu would have remained a cool game I saw on SSFF and not a game I played to the end and fell in love with the aesthetic feel it has!

Also that's a game I cheated like crazy on lol, I would do it again! Save state scumming games meant to be rudely difficult is only fair :P

I probably would have never sat down to play through Windwaker which was such a positive and uplifting experience that I now get the most relaxed and warm feeling in my heart when I see those blue waves.

There's so many experiences I would have left on the table in favor of like... putting more hours into a live service title or something.

Maybe, and no offense to my cousin or anyone else playing it, but maybe I'd be no-lifing World of Warcraft nonstop just stagnating my interest toward the skinner box mechanics of an MMO?

Some offense, actually but lightheartedly lol.

But beyond the entire games I've played for the blog, when I think retphienix I picture all the time making gifs, all those games I played on the PSP for short stints, buying a retron 5 to add to what I could explore and being stoked when they shipped a freebie box of old controllers to go with it, getting angry at the retron for being a Piece Of Shit lol, crying at the end of damn near every game with an emotional story because I'm a big emotional mess of a person who finds investing and crying at a story way too easy thanks to empathy pulls, oh!-

Getting excited whenever I found that I had a "*controversial*" opinion that no one would care about lol. Like the one that comes to mind is that I thoroughly believe that Dragon Ball Z II: Gekishin Freeza!! for the NES is WAY better than the fandom recognized and appreciated sequel/remake Dragon Ball Z: Legend of the Super Saiyan!

How many people do you hear talking about either game, let alone saying the NES game that is roughly half of the SNES remake is the better one :P But I stand by that! The SNES one is a remake of DBZ1 and 2 for the NES but it loses all the charm and some of the fun of the NES ones by being a lackluster SNES game!

lol

I admitted wholeheartedly that this post would be a lit-

little directionless (gotta love the new tumblr poster making me break sentences like that), but to sum things up.

It's been 6 years. It's been an untold amount of work to be honest- liveblogging a game, at least for me, hasn't been the easiest thing. It's a lot of thinking out my thoughts (heh), it's a lot of learning tools to make the capturing process possible, it's a lot of experimenting, it's a lot of writing and editing, and, well, sometimes it's just tough.

I mean I went to school for coding, not video editing, not writing, not image processing, not this or that- but this hobby has introduced a lot of things even if only at a VERY base level (I admit fully to using online alternatives to make gifs for instance).

I learned a lot about, well, a lot of things in order to use this blog to learn more about games- and all that work has become part of why I've loved all 6 years of this blog.

6 years of gaming, work, and you all- and it's been worth the investment :) Here's to many more and all of you whether you stumble upon this post or not- literally anyone who's interacted in these 6 years, thank you, and anyone who hasn't I offer you well wishes as well.

<3

[batskulldrag]

Phoenix by Fallout Boy

Here’s chapter Two

Trigger warnings for abuse, this story has a lot of abuse mentions in it. 

Chapter Two: Let It Burn by RED      

               The trio watched in stunned silence as Payton argued with the receptionist over something and stormed past her. Just to look at him or be near him made their collective blood run cold. Something came off him, something untrustworthy. This was a man who could bend and break people, and he used to practice on them.

               He moved past them without so much as a glance in their direction. Good. And stormed directly towards a single room. A doctor took everyone by surprise and blocked his path.

               The doctor in question was a tiny morsel of a person with bright red hair and glasses that framed their face. That this of anyone would stand up to the literal worst was amazing.

               “I’m sorry, but no one in allowed in this room right now.” The doctor said, all five feet of them standing confidently.

               “I’ll have you know that my son is in that room! And you have no right to forbid me to see him!” Payton seethed.

               “Your son,” The doctor spat the words back at him. “Has been sedated and is now sleeping. And I have every right to keep you from charging in there and waking him up!”

               “I could sue you for malpractice as easy as I could snap my fingers!”

               “Oh, on what grounds?” They mocked in return.

               “Operating on a minor without parental consent! And denying access to the legal guardian.”

               “We did no such thing. And all I asked was that you don’t charge in there and wake up a child who had just been through considerable trauma.”

               “Do you have any idea who I am in this city?” He hissed.

               “I don’t care if you’re Jesus, you stay out here until the doctor decides that our patient is ok to have visitors.”                

               “Let me through or I will have no choice but to report your insubordination to an actual doctor!” Many people looked over at him as he yelled.

               “You think you can get up in my face ‘cause I’m TINY?!” The doctor snapped right back at him, not moving an inch. “Because if I call security right now only one of us is getting thrown out for causing a disturbance! I’ll let you guess who!”

               “You- you should be arrested for impersonating a doctor!” He fumbled the insult as he backed down.

               Roman walked up to the doctor as if he were in a western.

               “Is this guy giving you trouble?”

               “No, I took care of him.” The doctor said smugly.

               “It seems like you’re suddenly everywhere, Roman.” Payton sneered.

               “And it seems you weren’t home when I pulled your son from a burning building.”

               “Well if you were so conveniently there, I think that would make you a suspect.”

               A tired, disgruntled police officer came between them. Roman knew them.

               “So, you’re the kid’s dad?” The cop, Officer Joan asked.

               “I am, and it was my house that’s been burnt to ashes.” He rubbed his temples. “I feel like the world is testing me.”

               “Where were you at the time of the fire?” Joan didn’t care about his problems.

               “I was meeting with my campaign manager from ten o clock until twenty minutes ago, when I was called and told that my son was in the hospital.”

               “Can they verify that?”

               “Am I a suspect in this? Why would I destroy my own home, or endanger my son?”

               “I have to ask everybody these questions, I asked crazy twin guy the same things.” Joan rolled their eyes, pointing backwards at Roman. “Do you have any enemies?”

               “Yes, and more keep coming out of the woodwork.” He shot a glare at Roman. “I’m a very successful prosecuting attorney, I’ve put plenty of criminals in prison and angered even more defense lawyers. I’m also running for mayor, on the platform of clearing the city of immorality, which gives my opponents a motive. And my brother and his friends have started a smear campaign against me. Which I suppose makes them suspect, especially when you consider who was at the scene of the crime first.”

               “Crazy twin guy has an alibi that can be verified by about two hundred people. Save your bullshit for your day job.” Joan made a few notes. “If you don’t mind, I’d like for you to accompany me to the station so I can ask you a few more questions.”

               “About what? You can’t honestly believe I started that fire!”

               “No, this is about a few things we found odd about your house layout and son’s condition.”

               “I beg your pardon!” He said through gritted teeth.

               “That’s what you say to a judge, not a cop. You gonna come quietly or do I need to put the cuffs on you?”

               “What has Virgil been saying!? I demand to speak to him immediately!”

               “He’s been passed out for the past hour. And he was barely conscious when he got here.” The doctor chimed in. “He hasn’t said anything. Why? What were you expecting him to say?”

               “I invoke my right to speak to my accuser.” Payton hissed, rapidly losing control of the entire situation.

               “Me bitch.” Joan said, pulling out handcuffs. “Let’s talk in the car.”

               “Payton Foster, I’m arresting under suspicion of domestic abuse, child endangerment, disturbing the peace and arson.” Joan slapped the cuffs on. “You have the right to remain silent…”

               The sound of Joan reciting the Miranda bill faded as the two walked down the hallway and outside.

               “Doctor,” Patton asked timidly raising a hand. “Can you point me to the bathroom? I think I need to throw up.”

               “Right down that way.” They pointed.

               Patton darted off and only just made it to the toilet before everything came out. Had Payton really… could he? Sure, supposedly anyone could but, how could they?

                                                                               #             #             #

               So many memories of Payton just walking out and leaving him or their mother with the baby. Because he knew they weren’t going to leave a newborn to fend for himself. He never once thought to test of Payton would still walk out if he refused. But part of him always knew the answer.

               A tornado of his brother’s cruelty hit him upside the head with a tree.

               “Another ‘D’?” The taunting voice of his sibling echoed through. “Why do you even try? You should just quit school and see if someone will hire you as a janitor.”

               “If only we still had a class system so that people of your skill level could still find work.”

               “The only good thing about you being gay is that you won’t be able to have kids to raise to be gay.”

               “Your retard called, he realized he was too good for you after all.”

               “Patton does that retard know you were held back. That you literally couldn’t keep up with things the rest of us find easy?”

               “If you ask me, the retard’s parents had the right ideas.”

               And the ever present “What are you going to do cry about it?”

               And a lifetime later, alone in a bathroom stall Patton cried about it. After some time, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He didn’t need to turn around or say anything to know that it was Logan. Wordlessly he slid his own hand on to his husband’s and squeezed it as if it were the only thing tethering him to reality.

               “Child protective services just came in.” Logan said trying to mimic a soothing tone. “They’re going to be looking for next of kin, I think we should talk to them.”

               “Is this my fault?” The words came out barely audible.

               “No. It’s not.”

               “Maybe, but I didn’t help. I may have made things worse.”

               “Patton,” Logan stooped down to his level. “It doesn’t make sense to dwell on that. We’re here and we can’t change anything. The important thing is that Virgil is safe tonight, and his father may end up losing custody of him.”

               “To who? What if it’s someone worse?”

               “That’s why we’re talking to CPS right now. Come on.”

               Patton pulled himself together and joined Logan back in the land of the standing. He stopped to splash some water in his face so it wouldn’t look like he had been crying and the pair went out together.

               The social worker was a short man who was composed mainly of muscle. He looked like he could punch a hole in the wall, granted the hole wouldn’t be very close to the ceiling, but still. Patton couldn’t say anything about what this guy would do, but he was certain that this one could tackle somebody to the ground. But he had a kind face, and Patton could read him from across the room. He looked so sad as he listened to the doctor tell him about the case. And just a bit angry.

               “Boy am I glad he’s not mad at us.” Patton whispered to Logan as they got closer.

               Cobra Bubbles sighed and rubbed his face with both hands as if he were trying to wash the information off. They stopped in front of him and he looked them over.

               “I’m Patton Foster.” Patton held his hand out uncomfortably while trying to pull his hoodie down over his sleep shorts. “I normally wear pants I swear.”

               It wasn’t until this moment that he realized that he was criminally underdressed for any kind of interview. He wished hell would go ahead and eat him as he stood there in just his cat hoodie, with no shirt, and Blue’s Clues shorts (normally made for women, but he got an extra-large pair) that were just barely longer than his boxers, which he just realized were inside out. He looked at his feet to escape eye contact and saw that he was wearing one shoe and one sandal. Never mind hell eating him, he was already there.

               Logan didn’t look any better, sure he was wearing longer pants but they were white with unicorn print. And you could totally see his underwear through them. He had tried to cover that by dawning a long coat, but that just made him look like a school shooter. And the coat was unbuttoned anyway. Patton dared a glance at Logan’s feet and saw that he had his unicorn slippers on instead of shoes. But the worst part, oh the worst part was that Logan wore a powder blue t-shirt that had “Paw-ton” written in block letters across the chest with a big old heart. It was Patton’s shirt, and now everyone knew it was his shirt. And they knew what it implied, Logan wearing Patton’s shirt.

               Their eyes met in a glance of mutual horror as Logan pulled his coat closed with inhuman speed. They shared the same hope that maybe no one saw. Patton quickly sniffed the air, he couldn’t smell anything coming off them, maybe they were in the clear, at least in that instance.

               “It’s one in the morning.” The social worked cracked a smile. “I didn’t think you’d look presentable just now.” He shook Patton’s hand. “I’m Thomas.”

               “Oh, ok.” Patton retracted his other hand and kept trying to pull his hoodie down. “I’m Virgil’s uncle. Payton is my older brother.”

               “Why are you both down here? We haven’t even started calling the next of kin yet.”

               “Our friend broke his arm getting Virgil out of the fire. He called us to get him.”

               “Hi.” Roman waved his cast.

               “Hi.” Thomas nodded.

               “I’m Logan Berry,” Logan stepped up. “I’m Patton’s husband.”    

               “So, I take it that you two are ok with taking care of Virgil?” Thomas said, shaking Logan’s hand. “At least until we hunt down his mother.”

               “She immigrated to Italy after Virgil was born.” Patton stared at the floor. “I-if she wants custody of him, I won’t keep him from her. But I don’t know if she does.”

               “Poor kid.” Thomas looked back to the room. “Well, his mom still has parental rights, so we need to talk to her. But if she left the country and left her baby behind, I’ve got a pretty good guess on how that’s gonna go.”

               “Then it comes back to us.” Logan finished the idea. “And we’d be glad to take him.”

               “Yeah, and we’re all teachers. So, we’re great with kids.” Patton added.

               “It’s nice to finally hear some good news.” Thomas sighed. “Virgil’s not allowed any visitors tonight, so you can go. Come back in the morning and we’ll get everything sorted.”

               “Ok, I’ll be back in the morning.” Patton agreed. “I’ll be here with pants on.”

               His attempt at a joke seemed to fall flat, but Thomas gave him a good-natured smile. Patton and Logan backed away awkwardly before turning around and walking like normal people. Roman joined them and they all got into the car in silence. As soon as the doors were closed, Roman broke the silence by laughing.

               “What’s so funny?” Logan asked tonelessly from the front seat.

               “You two and the social worker.” He choked. “And dressed like that!”

               “We came down here at one A.M to get you from the emergency room.” Logan protested. “We were in a hurry!”

               “It would have been weird if we were dressed!” Patton added. “This actually proves that we’d be good parents, because our priorities are in order! When you get called from the emergency room you throw clothes on in the dark and come down!”

               “Must have been a good night if you didn’t have clothes on when I called.” Roman snickered.

               “FALSEHOOD!!!!!!!” Logan screeched, his entire body turning red.

               “I meant to say shoes! You throw shoes on in the dark! Because you already have clothes on!” Patton fumbled an explanation.

               “So, Logan has a shirt with your name on it because he belongs to you?” Roman teased.

               “You noticed?” Patton whimpered, turning red as well. “Do you think the social worker noticed too?”

               “Ok. No one is allowed to talk until the sun is up.” Logan ordered.

               When the sun did come up, and it came up rather soon especially for a Saturday, the three had other things to talk about anyway.

               “Ok, Patton and I are in one room, and you occupy one room.” Logan began.

               “I knew that SIRI.” Roman sighed. “What are you getting at?”

               “Well, there’s still Remus’s old room, Virgil can stay in there.”

               “We turned that room into a storage closet after Remus went to grad school.” Roman groaned. “I suppose I’ll start moving boxes.”

               “I believe that I’ll be doing most of the moving today, given your injury.”

               “I can still move things!” Roman protested.

               “No.”

               “Can I help arrange the stuff in the attic? That just requires me to slid stuff across the floor.”

               “I will allow that. And we may find something in storage that we can use.”

               “Kill two birds with one stone.” Roman nodded.

               “That’s cruel and has nothing to do with-… oh. Right, a metaphor.”  

                                                                               #             #             #

               Patton walked timidly into the hospital whishing he had stayed behind to get the room ready and sent Logan to deal with the paperwork. But as the legal next of kin, he had to be the one to sign everything. He wondered if he might get to meet Virgil while he was there. But what if Virgil didn’t like him?

               “I see you’re alone this morning.” Thomas startled him. “But at least you remembered your pants.”

               “Logan and Roman are getting the house ready.” Patton said quickly. Why did he feel so guilty, he hadn’t done anything? “They’re clearing out a room and all that stuff.”

               “You seem to be adapting to all this pretty well.” Thomas smiled warmly.

               “I guess, but we haven’t done any of the actual parenting.”

               “What, are you worried about what you’ll do if he comes out as straight?” Thomas joked. “You won’t have time to mess up, you’ll have me breathing down your necks.”

               Patton smiled back, temporarily relieved. At least this guy was friendly, he couldn’t handle a jaded, world weary social worker.

               “Let’s go over the paperwork and the background checks and afterwards we’ll see if the doctors will let him have visitors.” Thomas offered.

               Patton nodded and followed him to administration.

                                                                               #             #             #

               Logan finished organizing the attic and walked down the stairs only to meet Roman in the middle, dragging up a large wooden object. He used one hand and his elbow to grip it. Tell Roman he can’t do one thing and that’s all he wants to do.

               “What is that?” Logan pointed stunned. “And I told you not to lift things!”

               “A portion of my own bed from when I was in my teens. I got it from my parents’ attic. Now move, this thing is heavy.” Roman disregarded him.  

               Logan ran up the stairs, propped the emptied room’s door open and ran down to help Roman with the rest of the bed frame. After three trips, and a good deal of swearing they got all of it into the room. It was then that the truth about this bed came out.

               “Roman, this is the skeleton of a futon isn’t it?” Logan asked, ready to face palm.

               “Remus set my actual bed on fire! This was all they could do! And he set this one on fire as well!”

               “So. There’s no mattress either?” Logan completed the face palm.

               “No.” Roman looked at the ground.

               “Ok, this will have to do until we get him a proper bed, and we will get him a proper bed.” Logan sighed. “Let’s just put it together, where are the instructions?”

               “In the past, no one has seen them in over a decade.” Roman answered hesitantly. “But I helped put it together, I should be able to manage it.”

#             #             #

               Logan felt a migraine setting in and Roman had exhausted his vocabulary of insults from screaming at the futon. An hour had passed, Patton would be home any minute to see what a pair of failures they were. He was at his breaking point.

               “Of course!” Roman yelled triumphantly. “We can google futons like this one and use their instructions.”

               “Why didn’t we think of that an hour ago?” Logan said in a strained whisper.

               After that putting it together only took twenty minutes. This only added to their fury.

               “Ok,” Logan sighed. “I’m going to go scream into a pillow, then we’re going to get a mattress for this monstrosity.”

               “I’ve been thinking about that. We could get a normal mattress and put it on this, so then it’ll just be a normal bed.”

               “Roman, you’re a genius.”

               “Wow, you are out of it.”

                                                                                               #             #             #  

               The paperwork took longer than Patton had thought it would, and the background check took forever. Which was especially annoying because he didn’t have any criminal record. But all that was finally over, he was now prolonging the inevitable as one of the doctors explained everything that was wrong with Virgil.

               “So, Virgil is a good deal underweight and he currently has strep throat. And according to his records, he’s been sick a lot both this year and last year. And there were more than a few injuries. We haven’t had anyone analyze him yet, but we suspect that he has severe anxiety.”

               “Ok.” Patton nodded.

               I hate my brother.

               “He has a few burns from last night, mostly on the palms of his hands and the bottom of his feet. He inhaled a good deal of smoke, but there doesn’t seem to be any damage to his lungs. He also got a few scrapes and bruises from falling off the landing, and he broke his foot when he hit the ground.”    

               “Poor baby.” Patton exclaimed automatically.

               “And the last thing is,” The doctor sighed. “He has a few older bruises on his back, torso, arms and legs. They all seem to very in age.”

               Payton if you don’t go to hell, I will petition all the saints to send you there!

               “Is-is that why you suspected Payton of… of hurting him?”

               “Yes.” They sighed as if the weight of the world was on top of them. “One of the bruises is in the perfect shape of a belt buckle. There’s no explanation for that.”  

               Patton felt his heart racing, and everything turned red. All he could think of was the innocent little baby that he and his mother had taken care of because Payton wasn’t going to. It didn’t look like they were living in a kind universe, but he really hoped it was a just one.

                                                                               #             #             #

               Roman and Logan pulled into the driveway with a mattress strapped to the roof and an old dresser shoved into the back. The dresser had belonged to Remus, and for some reason he spray-painted it black, but that was ok. They could paint over that. At least it didn’t have any bodily fluids on it. Hopefully.

               Roman jumped out and ran to open the door, only to trip on a medium sized box someone had left there. There was a note on the obstruction.

               Crazy twin guy, dude’s going to jail for a while. Cleaned my closet out last month and was too lazy to get rid of this stuff. It’s your problem now. -Joan.

               “We have a benefactor Logan!” Roman said happily. “Officer Joan has given us some old clothes and a message of encouragement.”

               “What encouragement?” Logan asked, untying one of the ropes.

               “Dude’s going to jail for a while.” Roman recited as if it were Shakespeare.

               “That is good news.” Logan smiled. “Should we bring up the mattress first or the dresser?”

               “Mattress, it should be easier. And there is not a doubt in my mind that my brother put his penis on that dresser at some point.”

               “Sometimes I really feel like Remus needs to be sedated and institutionalized.”

               They both pulled down the mattress and hauled it inside.

               “I can’t believe we’re supposed to be identical twins. That means we have one hundred percent the same DNA! How does that make sense?”

               “Only one of you got brain damage.” Logan shrugged. “Besides, Patton’s brother turned out to be a narcissist, do you know how rare that is?”

               They fought the mattress up the stairs.

               “Sure, but it’s not like everyone in Florida is one, just Payton. Seems pretty rare to me.”

               With that they threw the mattress onto the frame.

               “There.” Logan said proudly, “A bed and Payton’s old desk, now all we need to do is haul up that dresser.”

               “Let’s just get that over with.” Roman sighed.

               The two drudged down the stairs and found one of their neighbors standing in the driveway. This one was a particularly annoying middle-aged woman. Single and childless, yet somehow a self-proclaimed expert on both relationships and child rearing. Logan turned right back around and went back inside when he saw her. Roman reluctantly went up to talk to her, it was the only way to make her leave.

               “Can I help you?” He asked flatly, hoping he couldn’t.

               “What are you three doing? I heard you leave at one in the morning last night, and now you’re going back and forth bringing furniture into the house. Are you getting another roommate?”

               “Yes.” A satisfactory lie of omission.

               “Where’s Patton? I saw him leave this morning, and he’s not back yet.”

               “He has a day job.”

               “But he’s not there, I already checked.”

               Roman rolled his eyes. Why couldn’t this one be a sweet old lady? Or I nice couple? Or a cute single guy, gay of course?

               “I don’t know then.” None of her business anyway.

               “You know what I think,”

               You forgot to ask if I cared.

               “I think it has something to do with his brother, you know the one who’s running for mayor, his house burned down last night. It was all over the news.”

               “If you don’t mind Logan and I still have a lot of work to do.”

               “Is it true what he said? You know about his and Patton’s mother?”

               “No, it is a blatant lie Patton already submitted proof of that.” Roman swung the trunk open and dragged the dresser to the door one handed. “Good day.”

                                                                               #             #             #

               Patton bit his lip as he listened to the phone ring on the other end.

               “Hello Patton,” Logan answered in his usual manor. “Is something the matter?”

               “No, I just need some advice.” Patton sighed.

               “Well, what is it?”

               “Virgil’s awake, the doctors are taking care of him now. And I get to meet him when they’re done. But should I wait and introduce us all at once or do it one at a time?”

               He was answered by a brief silence, then Roman.

               “Hey Patton,” Roman said quickly. “Logan and I are just dealing with nothing going on right now.”

               “Logan! Did you just punch me!?” Roman suddenly yelled. “You just did it again, you friggin book germ! Why are you signaling me to shut- oh.”

               “Roman?” Patton asked, now very suspicious.

               “Never mind all that. What do you need to know?”

               “Well, I’m gonna meet Virgil, but I don’t know if I should have us all meet him at once or do in in little bits.”

               “Ok, you’re already there, so I think you should just meet him as you. But you should definitely tell him that we exist.”

               “Ok.” Patton smiled for no one’s benefit. “What’s going on with you two?”

               “Nothing, good luck with the kid. Bye.”

               With that Roman hung up on him.

               “Ok, love you, bye.” Patton said to the dead phone.

               Patton returned the phone to his pocket and took a deep breath to steel himself. He glanced down at the stuffed bear he had bought from the gift shop, it had a little hive that said ‘Bee Well’ across it. That was the perfect dad joke to break the ice, and a cute animal to boot. He could do this.

               He looked through the window and saw several doctors and Thomas talking to a teenage boy. Patton paused. He didn’t recognize him. The baby face had been replaced with Payton’s jawline and Virgil had no baby fat left. In fact, he had almost no body fat at all. That can’t be good. In place of his little blond tufts of hair was long black hair, well long in the front any way. His bangs swept over his face like a curtain. The only things that were the same were his eyes. The same amazing violet eyes. Worry was reflected in them now, but they were still beautiful.

Right now, he was biting his lip and pulling his knees to his chest. Thomas said something and he started chewing on the bandages that covered his hands rather than his lip, the news was out now. Thomas sat down next to him and said something else, at that Virgil put his head on his knees and covered his head with his arms. With his messed-up hands, he fruitlessly pulled at his hair. Thomas talked to him for a minute more then walked to the door to let Patton in.

               Never mind. I can’t do this. Patton walked in quietly.

               Virgil didn’t look up.

               I can’t do this!

               “Virgil,” Thomas said trying to sound upbeat. “This is your uncle, Patton. And he’s going to be taking care of you for a while.”

               Virgil shuddered, and though he was trying to hide it he was visibly shaking.

               Ok, natural greeting. Neutral.

               “Hey kiddo.” Patton said softly.

               WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?!!!

               “I know this is a lot to take in, and that you’ve been having a rough time.” Patton paused, where was he going with this? “So, uh… I’m not gonna press you to do anything you’re not comfortable with. And… I would like you to come stay with me, but you don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

               “I mean.” Virgil finally spoke, his voice was strained. “I don’t wanna live on the street, and that’s kind of the only other option.”

               Patton walked up to the bed. He knew what to do, it was as if his instincts kicked in.

               “Can I sit down?” He asked. Pointing to a spot besides Virgil.

               “Do whatever you want.” Virgil mumbled into his blanket.

               Patton sat next to him and gingerly placed a hand on the younger man’s shoulder. Virgil flinched. He flinched and made a kind of whimpering sound in his throat. Patton felt a rage burn inside his chest. He feared that if he tried to talk, he would breath fire.

               “It’s ok,” He soothed. No fire, good. “I’m not gonna hurt you.”

               “Isn’t that the bare minimum?”

               “I said we’d take baby steps. Nothing you’re not comfortable with.”

               “Yeah?” Virgil looked up at him, his eyes red with tears.

               “Of course.” Patton smiled reassuringly and ran a hand through his nephew’s hair.

               Virgil closed his eyes and sighed almost euphorically at the contact. Patton bit back bile at the thought that this poor, innocent kid was so completely starved for affection that he would all but melt for the first person to show him basic human kindness. If Payton didn’t go to hell…

               Virgil slid his head down and rested it on Patton’s shoulder. He had stopped shaking and was just at rest. Patton wished he had brought a camera, but he knew he’d remember this moment even without pictures. This one was going in the vault.

[just-for-cal]

Post-Concert Livestream - [c.h]

word count: 1559 warnings: swearing, pure teeth rotting, heart melting fluff,  summary: your secret relationship isn’t so secret when Luke shows it off during a livestream

The Sydney concert was always one of the largest, wildest, and loudest concert that the boys put on.  Always going all out and just completely losing themselves to their music and their fans.  And afterwards, they would crash hard.  Really hard.

But tonight, when the five of them made it back to their bus, Luke had decided he wanted to do a livestream to share the experience and gush about how grateful for their fans he is.

Calum had tugged (y/n) with him onto the sofa of the bus, just enjoying some time with her.  They’d been together for nearly a year now, and had managed to keep their relationship pretty private.  With the exception of the other boys.  But the public eye hadn’t noticed their shift from friendship to something more.

It wasn’t that he was ashamed, or embarrassed, he loved (y/n) with his entire being.  They’d mutually agreed to keep their love life a secret from fans and paparazzi for the mere reason that it always sparked drama.  Leaked photos and hate comments were the last thing either of them wanted, and they didn’t want it to cause a rift in their relationship.  So they kept up their image of being friends while around anyone else.

That also meant their friends and family had to witness their more loving moments.

Like now, with Calum leaning his back against the sofa, cradling (y/n) in his lap and resting his head on her shoulder while he rested.  (y/n) wasn’t near as tired as him, but she hadn’t just put on a grand show.  So she just carded her fingers through his hair and whispered praise about his performance.

“You did so good baby,” She murmured, kissing his slightly sweaty forehead.  “Love watching you get in the zone like that, you’re so cute”

He chuckled into her neck, adjusting his head to get more comfy against her.

“Always my number one fan” He told her quietly, making her smile and cuddle into him more as well.

“Hey guys, it’s Luke, from Five Seconds of Summer,” Luke’s greeting made everyone groan a bit, realizing he was starting a stream.  “And I wanted to say thank you to everyone that made tonight amazing”

He went on to thank the viewers that had been increasing by the second the longer he was filming.

Ashton was the only one able to muster up the energy to really join him, while Michael was making noodles in the microwave, and (y/n) and Calum were too busy resting up to provide any sort of appearance in the stream.

“We could just go to bed,” (y/n) murmured into her boyfriend’s hair, but he shook his head, holding her tighter.  “Or not”

“Jus’ wanna cuddle you” He muttered.

“Well you could cuddle me in bed?” She suggested, but he didn’t reply, and she assumed he was moments away from passing out right there on her shoulder.  Not that she minded, opting to simply comb his hair lovingly.

“You guys are the sweetest!” Luke was saying to the viewers as they left comments and hearts on the livestream, all of his energy regained just from it.  “Ashton, look at all these”

you guys are so cute !! post-concert glow looks good on u ugh i wish i could’ve seen the show tonight where’s mike and cal? the show was fucking awesome tonight!!!!!

The comments went on and on, popping up every second with more flattery and cute emojis.

“Mike, Cal, get in on this!” Ashton hollered, earning a string of curses from behind the curtain where the bunks were, and a quiet shush from (y/n).

“Cal’s asleep” She said softly, and Luke walked over, flipping the camera around to display their current position.  Calum totally knocked out, holding (y/n) securely in his lap, her arms around his neck, a hand in his hair, and his head resting in the crook of her neck.  (y/n) smiled at the camera, leaning her cheek on the top of his head.

At this, tons of notifications kept zooming in.  Comments, hearts, screenshots, people saying things in all caps, Luke’s phone was going berserk.

OMG ARE THEY A THING I HOPE THEY’RE DATING ARE THEY TOGETHER???? THEY’RE SO CUTE MY SHIP IS SAILING!!! LOOK AT HIM!! ^^ LOOK AT HER!!!!

“Well you two are certainly popular,” Luke laughed, reading some off to (y/n).  She giggled at a few, said thanks to a few others, all while staying in Calum’s embrace.

“You should do your thing,” Ashton suggested giddily, but (y/n) hesitated, not sure if she should with the audience that Luke was streaming to.  “Come on, show them your talent! The people wanna see”

“Alright, alright,” She gave in, and tilted her head down to see Calum, her hands cupping his cheeks and pulling his heavy head away from her to press her lips against his softly.  He woke up almost right away, pulling her into him closer to kiss her properly.  And if the viewers weren’t shocked before, they definitely were now

HOLY SHIT OHMYGOD IT’S HAPPENING THEY ARE DEFINITELY TOGETHER WHEN DID THIS HAPPEN??? HOW LONG FINALLY WHO MADE THE FIRST MOVE ?!?!?!?!

“Smile,” (y/n) whispered when she pulled away.  “You’re on camera”

Calum turned to see Luke there, still holding his phone up to them, and the bassist’s brows furrowed as he looked back at (y/n).

“Guess it’s not a secret anymore” He mumbled.

“Alright, that’s enough from us, goodnight everyone” Luke gave a wave to the camera before ending the livestream, leaving millions of fans in a shock.

“Who knew you guys had such a fanbase,” Ashton said, scrolling through Twitter on his own phone.  “Those pictures are already blown up, they’re all over the place.  And everyone seems so excited”

“Of course they are,” Calum said, lifting (y/n) up in his arms bridal style.  “We’re adorable”

With that he turned and carried her back to the bunks, struggling to open the curtain with her in his arms, but he managed somehow.

“So loud,” Michael muttered, pulling is own curtain in between the top and bottom bunk shut for more privacy.  “E’ryone’s always so loud”

Calum lifted her up and rolled her on top the top bunk on the opposite wall, making her giggle softly as he climbed up and in with her, tugging shut their own curtain.  It felt like routine when he wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into snuggle with him.

“You don’t mind that we’re not a secret anymore?” She asked him as her fingers played with the collar of his black tee shirt, and Calum shook his head.

“No,” He answered quietly.  “I’m glad it’s out, tired of never gettin’ to kiss you in public,” (y/n) smiled at him bashfully, eyes flickering up to his.  “Besides, it’s been so long now, and we’re much more serious than we used to be.  Back then it was… different.  We were younger and friskier and didn’t need the prying eyes, but it’s different now”

“You think we’re serious?” She asked, knowing full well that they’re relationship had matured greatly in the past year.

“Course we are” He hummed back.

“Me too,” (y/n) said as she pressed a chaste kiss to his lips.  “They were bound to find out somehow, might as well tease them a bit first”

“I’m sure we did just that tonight,” Calum said, his eyes falling shut as his fingers traced lazily against her skin beneath her shirt.  “But look if anyone makes a single comment, no matter how minor, that bothers you, I’ll-”

“I know,” (y/n) murmured, a loving smile gracing her lips as she cut him off.  “You’ll drag them until they have to remove your Twitter account, I know”

“I think you may have finally realized just how much I love you,” Calum told her, because it was as though she could read his mind, they were so in sync.  His lips brushed her forehead before speaking again.  “But even still, I’m not sure you’ll ever know”

“I love you too,” She whispered, folding her arms against his chest and tucking her head into the crook of his neck, using his bicep as her pillow.  “So much, I’m a little scared,” She admitted into his skin, soft and breathless.  “Only a little though”

Calum smiled, basking in this moment for a few longing seconds.  Caressing her skin, and feeling her heart beat against his as they drifted off to sleep

“You don’t scare me near as much as you used to, love,” He mused.  “I’ve come to accept the fact that I’ll have you with me for the rest of our lives, so long as you’ll let me drag you along”

“I do,” She answered, smiling into his neck as her body completely relaxed into his.  Never before had an idea so bold and life changing been so easy to answer.  There was no hesitation, no reluctance in her simple words, only her love and agreement.  “I’d follow you to the ends of the earth, Cal”

“And I wouldn’t go without you,” He replied sweetly, kissing the crown of her head and sighing contently.  “Goodnight, baby”

“Goodnight” She murmured back, falling asleep with a smile on her face, as their hearts beat in sync with one another.

xoxo ~ jordie

[ellie-scribble]

Ruin Me

A Bucky x Reader fic written for @littledarlinhavefaithinme‘s marvelous writing challenge. I had the prompt:

“Why aren’t you dating him/her?”

“Because I’d destroy him/her.”

“He’d/She’d be into that.”

Summary: You want Bucky Barnes to ruin you, and he wants to ruin you. You let your best friend Nat know this, and she tries her hardest to get you together. Some mutual pining and minor angst?

Warnings: Smut. That’s what this fic is. Language, I guess? Is thigh-riding a warning? Yeah, that’s it.

Word Count: 3441. oops. i went a little overboard

A/N: this is my first attempt at writing fanfiction, so I hope it’s alright. feedback would be great. if you want a playlist to listen to, I listened to this while writing it. the gif isn’t mine.

“Okay, okay. Barnes, Rogers, Wilson.”

You and your favorite Avenger, Nat, were currently playing fuck, marry, kill at 3 a.m. in her room. You had recently joined the Avengers and had become fast friends with this feisty redhead. You’d probably be into her- if it weren’t for your current obsession with another Avenger.

“Fuck Barnes, marry Rogers, and kill Wilson,” you respond, almost too quickly.

“Barnes, eh?”

Your cheeks redden slightly, but you don’t back down, “Have you seen those thighs? He could strangle me with them and I’d thank him.”

“Are you ever gonna do anything about that? It’s pretty clear that he’s into you too-”

“First of all, not true. Second of all, I don’t have the balls to do anything about it,” you reply. You and Bucky have had this thing going on. You would flirt back and forth all the time, you would sit by each other on movie nights, and you worked flawlessly together on missions. But whenever things got too serious, he would back off.

“This is coming from the person who told the leader at HYDRA to, and I quote, ‘suck my dick and choke on it, I’m a fucking avenger.’” Nat did have a point. During missions, you tended to have quite the filthy mouth. Steve may not have like Tony’s language, but boy did he hate yours.

“That’s different. I want him to literally ruin me, but if he doesn’t want to-”

“He does,” Nat interjected, “And I’m going to prove it to you.”

“Nat-,” you warned.

“Y/N, if you won’t do anything about your obsession with Bucky Barnes, I will. I know all about your freaky sex kinks-”

“They’re not that weird,” You try to interrupt.

“-And I will willingly play your wingwoman for Barnes,” she finished with a flourish. You sit back on the couch, pondering what this means. Will you finally get to fuck the super soldier who’s been haunting your dreams? To be completely honest with yourself, you had been hoping someone would do something to help your relationship with Bucky move along.

Thank god for redhead assassins.

Sam picked the movie of the night. Sam being Sam chose How to Train Your Dragon. When you arrived in the mini-theatre, almost everyone was there already. Sam was standing by the tv, fiddling with the cable box while Tony stood next to him, assumingly making sure he didn’t break anything. Steve and Wanda were setting up the usual snack table, complete with salty popcorn and tons of alcohol. Nat was seated next to Bucky on the loveseat and was talking softly to him. It seemed normal, but then you remembered the conversation you had had yesterday.

Oh shit.

When Nat saw you come in, she stood up and moved to sit next to Steve, opening up the seat next to Bucky. She knew what she was doing.

“Y/N, come sit by me.” Bucky waved you over, and you mentally prepared yourself for another night of teasing, with no real outcome. As soon as Clint arrived, the movie was started and opened up onto a dark island with Hiccup voice-over.

“You’ve seen this before, doll?” Bucky whispers in your ear. You almost shiver, like you usually do when he calls you that.

“Yeah, it came out like, 10 years ago. The third one is coming out soon,” you whisper in return. When you originally met Bucky, you had made it your goal to educate him on the most important things that had happened while he was gone. This meant many late nights spent with just him watching old Disney movies and reruns on the tv. How to Train Your Dragon was on the list of things for him to watch, but you were still working through movie musicals. Bucky’s favorite so far was Newsies, because of obvious reasons. He said that Steve was just like that Spot Conlon guy, except people weren’t afraid of him.

“I see. Was this on our watch list?” Bucky asks, scooting closer to you. Your thighs are touching. Just yesterday you were talking with Nat about how you’d love to ride those thighs into the sunset. Your face turned beet red at the thought and you coughed to cover up any noise you might have made. “You okay, doll?” Bucky asked, concern written all over his face. He placed his hand on your thigh, which only made you blush harder. You silently thanked Tony for the dark room.

“Yup. 100% okay. Couldn’t be okay-er.” That sounded normal. Way to go Y/N. Bucky turned back to watch the movie, but thankfully didn’t lift his hand from your leg.

For the rest of the movie, Bucky occasionally leaned over to whisper comments into your ear, but that was normal. By the end of it, you and Bucky were basically cuddling, which only made you more frustrated. Sexually and emotionally. The credits rolled and the lights were turned back on, which brought groans from everyone.

“Who’s up for some drinks?” Nat asks, her eyes gleaming with mischief.

“I’m gonna head to my room, I’m tired,” you say, knowing Nat has something planned. Clint nods along, and Tony and Wanda make their way out of the room as well.

“Come on, Y/N, it’ll be fun!” Now Nat was desperate. She wanted you to stay, and to be honest? You were terrified of what lengths she would do to get you and Bucky to get together by the end of the night. But, on the other hand, you were also terrified of what she would do if you didn’t get with him. So, you stayed.

“Fine, but only 2 drinks,” conceding to her plans. She gave you a wink and started to speak again.

“Alright, how about we play a little game? Truth or dare, huh?” Uh oh. She’s definitely got plans for you and Bucky.

“I don’t know if it’s changed from my time, but I’m in,” Steve says. He had no idea what was coming. Natasha smirked at his response, and he noticed. “Well you just have to tell the truth or do something, right?”

“Sure, Steve. Sure.” Sam was gonna torture Steve and Bucky. Those super soldiers may have been ready for anything on the battlefield, but drunk truth or dare with Nat? No fucking way.

“Alright, rules are as follows: you say truth, you gotta tell the truth, dare, you have to do it, and if you can’t, you drink. Got it?” We all reply a short ‘got it’ so that Nat is satisfied. “Alright, I’ll go first. Steve! Truth or dare?”

“Truth, I guess. I have nothing to hide.” That was a mistake.

“Okay, goody-two-shoes, who and when was your last good fuck?” Steve spit out the sip he had taken from his drink. He sat with his mouth open for a few seconds, then chugged his beer. It had no effect on him anyway.

“I am most definitely not answering that.” Steve’s face was bright red, which made you wonder what might have happened.

“So now we see where the game is headed, huh?” Bucky seemed unfazed by Nat’s question, and even looked eager for his turn.

“I guess it’s my turn then. Um, Sam. Truth or dare?”

Sam had no hesitation, “Dare.”

“I dare you to,” Steve started. He was spluttering. You could tell he was trying to think of something raunchy, as stated earlier. “Jump in the pool!”

You snorted. You didn’t want to laugh, because Steve looked so proud of himself, but then Natasha started laughing, so you let it loose. Pretty soon, the whole room was in shambles.

“What?” Steve asked. He looked so sad and confused, like a teddy bear.

“Jump in the pool? That’s the best you can do?” Sam laughed.

“I’d like to see you do any better!” Steve challenged.

“Fine. Y/N, if you could have anyone in here go down on you, who would you choose?” You had known Sam was going to ask a sexual question, but this one was a little too specific. You knew your answer right away, of course, but you made it look like you were thinking it through.

“Well, if I had to choose, I’d probably say Bucky,” you slowly get out, “That beard would probably feel amazing down there, and I’ve heard he was quite the ladies man back in the day.”

Bucky’s cheeks flushed, but he answered with a suave, “Well you’re not wrong. All the dames love me.” Bucky looked at Y/N and waggled his eyebrows.

Nat on the other hand just became more pissed, as it was obviously an opportunity for something more to blossom. She wanted things to move quicker. After more embarrassing truths and dares, it was your turn again.

“Alright, Y/N, your turn.”

“Okay, um. Nat, truth or dare?” You asked.

“You already know I’m picking dare,” replied Nat. She never refrained from doing even the most insane things. One time, when you all were very drunk, she had gone onto the roof and performed an old ballet routine. She was sloshed at the time, so it wasn’t very good, but it was fucking hilarious for the rest of the team.

“I dare you to show us some more of your so-called ‘dance moves’,” you say using finger quotes. Nat, never one to back down, does just this. Then, she sits down with an evil glint in her eye. You know what’s coming.

“Bucky, you know the drill.”

Bucky hesitates for a second, but then says a confident, “Dare.”

“I dare you,” Nat’s eye flitted to yours, then looked back to Bucky, “to kiss Y/N.”

Bucky’s eyes widened and you swore his cheeks were flushed. You looked into his blue eyes for a second, then your eyes darted to his lips. You saw him do the same, and in that moment you both saw what could be. You saw his smooth lips and thought of all the nights that could have been dates. You saw his eyes darken, and you thought of all the laughs, sweat, and tears you had shared. You saw his tongue wet his lips, and you thought of the long nights spent holding each other, and wishing for more. You wanted this more than anything, but a small part in the back of your mind kept screaming “This will change everything.” You wanted to lean in, but you were terrified. Not just of how this would shift your relationship with Bucky Barnes, but also of how he was processing this.

Luckily, some god had looked down on you, because he leaned in. As you got closer, your eyes fluttered shut. During the seconds that it took for your lips to touch, you were hyper aware of everything. The sound of the generators running. The lights flashing outside the Tower window. The feel of Bucky’s thigh against yours. And then, the taste of his lips.

Was it cliché to say that it felt like fireworks went off? Probably. But it still felt like that. He tasted of Asgardian liquor and salty popcorn from the movie. You kissed him for what felt like long hours and only mere seconds at the same time. When he finally pulled away, you couldn’t help but be disappointed.

You heard Steve cough, and then remembered that there were other people in the room. Nat had a smirk on her face, and looked very self-satisfied. Sam was in disbelief. Steve, on the other hand, kept coughing and looking away, a blush staining his cheeks.

You looked back to Bucky. He quickly looked away and cleared his throat. Did he not like it? Was it possible he truly only thought of you as a friend? You had always listened to Nat when she said that he liked you to, but even Natasha Romanoff is wrong occasionally. You cleared your throat.

“I’m gonna- I’m gonna go.” You felt sick to your stomach. How had you not noticed? Obviously, Bucky wasn’t ready for a relationship, or at least not one with you. You drank the rest of your drink and left. You heard Nat start to complain, but your disappointment clouded over everything. You could feel tears surfacing, but you refused to let them fall. How could you have thought Bucky Barnes, former Winter Soldier, could have possibly liked you? You felt the walls closing in. The generators you heard before suddenly started to sputter out. The lights were blinding you. You had only had two drinks, but it felt like you had been drinking for days. You stumbled down the hallway towards your room.

Back in the living room, Nat was questioning Bucky.

“You like her, don’t you? You want to be with Y/N?”

“Well, yeah, I guess. But she would never-” he was cut off.

“If that kiss shows anything, she definitely would,” Nat replied. She wanted Bucky to realize that you wanted him just as much as he wanted you.

“Yeah, man. I never thought someone would be into you, but I guess the ladies are into metal arms,” Sam imputed. Nat snorted at this, knowing that for you it was true.

“Why aren’t you dating her?”

“Because I would destroy her,” Bucky said, very seriously. He liked Y/N a lot, but he had a dark past. He was scared that he would hurt her, and told himself to stay away. He had loved her for a long time, but held those affections back in fear that she wouldn’t want them.

“She’d be into that,” Nat snarked. Steve choked on the drink he had just taken.

“I say just go for it, Buck. What’s the worst that could happen?” Steve suggested. Encouraged by Nat and Steve’s words, Bucky stood up and headed in the direction of your room.

As he was leaving, he could hear Nat’s voice yelling, “Don’t forget to use protection!” at him. Of course her mind went there.

The whole walk to your room, Bucky was second-guessing himself. What if you didn’t like him back? He had listened to Steve and Nat, but they could be wrong. He had been so caught up in his thoughts that he didn’t realize he had stopped in front of your door. He raised his arm to knock, and gathered the courage he needed.

You sat on your bed, flipping pages in a book. Your eyes scanned over the words, but you didn’t read a single one. All you could think of was him. A knock sounded at your door.. Maybe it was Nat here to offer her condolences. A small part of you hoped it was Bucky, but after how he reacted, you didn’t want to think about him. You opened the door, and your eyes met bright blue ones.

“Y/N-”

“Save it, Bucky. I know you don’t want anything from me. Just- just forget about it okay?” You were tired, and emotionally drained. You couldn’t deal with another rejection tonight. You started to close the door again, but Bucky’s metal arm stopped it.

“I don’t want to forget about it. The kiss,” Bucky stated. You were shocked. Your mouth was probably hanging open like a dead fish, but you had just heard the best words in your life. “I know you might not feel the same, but, I mean- well,  if you wanted to-” You cut him off by pressing your lips to his. That firework feeling? It was nothing compared to what you felt now.

At first Bucky hesitated, not wanting to wake up if this was all a dream. After a second, he began to move his lips on yours.

You pulled Bucky into your room and shut the door. He grabbed you by the hips and shoved you against the wall. You mind was only slightly aware of the pain in your back, but it was ever so aware of the hard length pressing into your inner thigh. You groaned into Bucky’s mouth and ground yourself on him.

“Y/N,” Bucky groaned. He moved his lips from yours, panting heavily. You both took that second to breathe. You ran your hands down his muscular back, feeling every ridge. He latched his lips onto your neck. You threw your head back and distantly heard it hit the wall. All you could feel was Bucky. You knew this wasn’t going to be soft and gentle. You wanted Bucky to ruin you, and that’s what he was going to do. You felt him tugging on the hem of your shirt with his right hand, his left being used to hold you up. He pulled your shirt up and over your head, and as soon as it was off, he brought his lips back to yours.

Bucky started moving and shifted both of his hands to your thighs. You rested your arms on his shoulders. You pulled your head back from his and looked deep into the blue. He seemed to have a moment of clarity that cut through his lust blown pupils.

“Вы согласны с этим?” Do you want this?

Without thinking, Bucky had reverted to Russian. Luckily, you spoke the language.

“Да, Bucky. Я хочу этот. Я тебя хочу.” Yes, Bucky. I want this. I want you.

“Are you sure?” Ever the gentleman, you thought.

“Yes.” You looked up into his eyes, and for a moment it seemed like he was going to regret kissing you.

Then, his lips slammed into yours. They weren’t there for long, though. He trailed his lips down your chest and reached underneath you to unclasp your bra. As he pulled back, he stared in amazement at you.

“Doll, you are the finest dame I’ve ever seen.” You blush at his words and start to say something, but a gasp leaves your mouth instead when his mouth latches onto your nipple. You arch your back in an attempt to get more friction. Bucky chuckles at this. “Impatient there, are we?”

You whimper as an answer to his question. Thankfully, he puts his mouth back on you. He slowly begins to trail his kisses lower and lower, past your stomach until he reaches the band of your pajama pants. He looks at you, and the blue is almost disappeared from his eyes, darkened with lust. Lust that you created. Until this moment, you hadn’t really convinced yourself that Bucky really wanted you. But the way he looked at you like a dying man and you were his last meal, you knew. He drags your pants down your legs and you are left on the bed in only your panties. Suddenly, it hits you that he still has his goddamn shirt on.

“Take your fucking shirt off,” you say breathily. Bucky lets loose a low chuckle at your forwardness. He can’t say he’s not into it, though. He shucks his shirt off, then returns his face to the apex of your thighs.

You can feel his warm breath on your center. Which is soaked. He licks a stripe up you clothed core and you shudder.

“Bucky…” you trail off, “Don’t tease me.” At these words, he tears off your panties and dives in. He’s licking and sucking and you’re getting closer to an orgasm with each stroke of his tongue. He teases your entrance with his tongue, before entering you with a metal finger. You moan at the difference in temperature. His tongue attacks your clit while his hand finds that one spot that pleases you above all else. The noises you’re making are purely pornographic at this point, and Bucky loves it. You reach down, unable to keep your hands to yourself. Bucky groans when you pull his hair.

He adds another finger, and within a few moments, your orgasm is washing over you.

“Holy fuck,” you whisper. “That- that was amazing.”

“We’re not done yet.” Bucky knows exactly which buttons to press to get you responding.

“I sure hope not,” comes your snarky reply. You love how, even in these intimate moments, you and Bucky can still crack jokes.

You wrap your legs around his and flip Bucky onto his back. He groans as he hits the mattress. The sight of you in all of your naked glory above him is more than enough to make him come, but he holds it off. But then you grind yourself into his thigh, and he becomes the moaning mess.

Riding Bucky’s thigh had always been a fantasy of yours, and it was finally becoming a reality. You pressed your core harder into his leg, feeling every shift of his muscle against the fabric of his pants. It created a delicious friction, and you weren’t going to stop. Bucky was enjoying the sight of you writhing against him. He loved the view of you growing closer to your completion by using him as a sex toy. Pretty soon, you reach yet another orgasm, and Bucky takes over again.

He stands up and takes off his pants and boxers, and you can’t help but stare. Bucky Barnes is fucking hung. When he notices you staring, he winks and chuckles, “The serum affected everything, doll.”

He reaches into the bedside table and pulls out a condom. He rolls it on and lines himself up with you, his eyes silently asking for permission. You nod, and he slowly pushes himself in.

Now, you were by no means a virgin, but Bucky was so big that it felt like you were.

“Doll, Y/N, you’re so fucking tight.” He buries himself to the hilt and stays unmoving, allowing you to adjust to his massive size. You are filled to the brim, and you finally understand why sex toys are made with veins and ridges. You can feel every inch of Bucky, and when he starts to move, you feel the friction that each ridge creates. You feel impossibly whole with Bucky inside you.

When Bucky begins to pick up the pace, the pleasure you felt is multiplied by tenfold. You already had two orgasms that night, and you were well on your way to a third. Bucky made you feel things like you never had before. You thought you had had good sex before, but it was nothing in comparison to this. As you neared your orgasm, you looked into Bucky’s eyes, and he was staring back at you. There was something so intimate about the act, so loving, that you came right then and there.

“Bucky!”

When Bucky felt your walls clench around him, he was done for. He came hard, just as you had.

“Y/N.”

Bucky thrusted a few more times, to ride out both of your orgasms. Then, he fell on top of you.

After a moment of silence, you groan.

“You’re heavy.”

“Well sorry that I’m tuckered out, doll,” Bucky chuckles. You knew he wasn’t really, that serum could keep him going all night, but you liked to think that you wore him out, even just a bit.

Bucky shifts over, and in doing so, slips out of you. You both groan at the loss. Bucky then stands up, ties off the condom, and throws it away. He goes to the bathroom and comes back with a wet towel to clean you up. When that is all done, he lays back down next to you, and draws you into his arms. You knew you needed to talk with Bucky, but that could wait until the morning. You don’t think you could talk coherently right now anyway. After all, Bucky Barnes had just ruined you.

A/N

alright folks that was it so far. if you enjoyed please let me know! my requests will be open because i want to write more, so drop one of those down. thanks babes!

[hugogw]

( CIS-MALE. HE/HIM ) you know SEBASTIAN ‘BASH’ GRAYSON, right? they’re TWENTY ONE and majoring in MUSIC COMPOSITION? still nothing? well, they look exactly like TIMOTHEE CHALAMET, so you can’t miss them. i’ve heard they’re really PASSIONATE, but super DESTRUCTIVE too… it makes perfect sense that they’re a VIRGO. anyways, if you see them, tell them they left their BINDER OF SHEET MUSIC in class and that i have it. 

hi guys! i’m madison and i’m super excited to be apart of this group? i already love it and every one of you SM so please, do me the honor in plotting with me! like this if you’d like to plot with bash and i’ll message you!

TW: Abuse, Alcoholism

There he is, the Dean’s son and an actual legacy.

For as long as he could remember, it’s unfortunately always been him and his father. His mom died while giving birth to Bash and his Dad has never ever forgiven him for it.

His father is abusive and an alcoholic (that same gene he passed down to his son unfortunately) though he hides it well because…he’s the Dean of the school. Both physically, emotionally and verbally. Since he’s been dealing with it his entire life, he’s sort of accepted it as something that he deserves so he doesn’t really fight it. After all, if it weren’t for him his mother would still be alive. And his father isn’t hurting anyone other than him so Bash has never…really seen the problem. A complete victim’s mindset.

So due to this he thinks he’s a worthless piece of shit that won’t amount to anything and who doesn’t deserve love or happiness. As his father constantly reminds him, he’s just a burden on the world and all around him, feeding to the country’s overpopulation. He was the biggest mistake of his Dad’s life.

Again, he thinks he deserves it and he believes he needs his father. Dean Grayson has convinced him that he wouldn’t survive a minute in the world without him. Bash is just…delusional and as much as he hates his Dad, he grossly respects and values his opinion. After all he doesn’t know better and doesn’t know anything more.

His father shielded him from a normal childhood too. He was homeschooled and had very few school friends. It wasn’t until high school where he was suddenly thrust into the social scene and let’s just say he didn’t adjust well.

On the frequent occasions where his father beats him to where it’s visible, Bash will usually go to a bar and elicit a fight to get more flesh wounds apparent so that he has an alibi. So basically everyone at Somerset just thinks he’s a drunken troublemaker who gets into a shit ton of fights. Which like…isn’t wrong. He is drunk or high 99% of the time and he’s getting into fights.

At least when he gets hit, he feels something. Whereas he’s gotten so good at numbing and shoving down any sort of feelings. Shout out to liquor!

He’s always loved music, it’s his sole happy place and when his fingers are gracing that of a piano it’s like…he’s transported away from the bullshit. As lame as it sounds, he feels like his piano is his only and last connection to his Mom. She used to play and when he plays, he feels like he’s playing for her and to her like…spiritually. He can feel her when he’s writing, composing and playing. She gives him the music and he puts it to paper.

Also gay af.

ALSO DO NOT CALL HIM SEBASTIAN. it’s a massive fucking trigger for him! it’s what his dad always calls him before he’s about to beat the shit out of him. i mean you can but he won’t react great.

PERSONALITY WISE:

He’s a sarcastic asshole who tries to act all tough but who is severely craving human intimacy and companionship. When people start to get close and he starts to trust them, he panics, literal panic attacks that cause him to just snap and do everything he can to push that person FAR away and out of his life. He’s really smart but he doesn’t think so which means he doesn’t apply himself. Doesn’t really trust anyone. Will party and sometimes when he’s really high he’ll like…relax and cut loose and be real with people but then the next day he’ll deny it ever happened.

PLOTS:

In simple terms: FWB, Exes that he probably cheated on or pushed away, Hook ups, Friends, Study buddies, party buddies, smoking buddies, reckless shithead buddies etc.

MORE DETAILED PLOTS:

ROMANTIC/PHYSICAL:

[ current | fwb ] muse a and muse b met through mutual friends and quickly hit it off as friends. offhandedly one day, muse a mentioned something one day that muse b quickly turned sexual. they locked eyes and the next minute they were in a room, locked away, undressing each other. after exiting the room, the two agreed that it would never happen again…until a few days later, when it did. they keep saying they won’t come back for more.

[ current | just do it already ] muse a and muse b have been in love with each other for like, ever. neither of them are willing to admit it though, even to themselves. their friends are constantly joking about it and they both wave it off – but when one isn’t looking, anyone could see the adoration in the other’s face with ease.

[ past | dating ] muse a and muse b were the kind of people that immediately rejected each other, going to other people instead. then muse a found themselves in a room with their ex and pulled muse b aside to ask them to fake being their significant other for the night. over the next few hours, their fake date became a real one and soon things progressed into a relationship.

[ previous | friends…i guess? ] muse a and muse b were friends prior to their spontaneous hook-up and their world turned upside down. dazed, they decided to start dating that moment and to their credit, tried to make it work for a few weeks. muse a finally ( and nervously ) let out that they weren’t feeling it. to their relief, muse b admitted they were feeling the same. they decided to stay friends, but now have the added “i’ve seen you naked” awkwardness.

[ previous/current | on again, off again ] muse a and muse b love each other, but their relationship is toxic so they are constantly on and off. they always get along as friends, but the second they became lovers something always changes. they care a lot about each other, but something always goes awry.

[ your choice | hook up ] muse a recently broke up with their significant other, and in their post-breakup state got some revenge by hooking up with their ex’s best friend, muse b. neither expected the night to be so…memorable. your choice on what they do about it.

PLATONIC:

[ positive | two way street ] muse a and muse b frequent the same coffee shop and often made casual hellos to each other until the coffee shop raised their prices. muse a went to order their usual drink and lifted their eyes in surprise at the new price, hand helplessly prepared to hand over exact change. muse b quickly swooped in and saved the day, buying both of their coffees. next time they were both in the shop, muse a paid for muse b’s drink. they flip who pays each time as some sort of game now, but they’ve only had minor conversation as one or the other always seems to be in a rush.

[ positive | friends ] when muse a moved in, they didn’t expect to see muse b climbing up/standing on the fire escape right outside their living room window. they went to confront muse b and scared them, making both fear for the life of muse b for a moment. apologetic, muse a invited muse b in and the two connected almost immediately. ( muse b may or may not have explained their presence on the fire escape during this conversation // reason could have been that they knew who lived in muse a’s apartment before but didn’t know that they moved )

[ current | platonic or romantic ] *tw: alcohol. muse a and muse b met at a bar. throughout the night, muse b got more and more inebriated. being the good ( or bad ) samaritan they are, muse a decides to take muse b back to their house before they end up on the floor. when they arrive at muse a’s building/house, muse b ( loudly ) asks muse a how the heck ! muse a knew where they lived. turns out – they live a mere few floors/doors/houses away from each other.

[ current | platonic ] muse a is an extrovert – so much so that when muse b started moving in, they didn’t even wait for the moving truck to pull away before introducing themselves. in fact, muse a even started helping unload the truck without being asked. ( BONUS: muse b was super grateful for the help and their relationship is great // muse b is Grumpy™ and was annoyed that muse a started helping without asking and their relationship is tense. )

[minijenn]

Universe Falls Chapter 69

AN: Heyoooo well this one’s finally done, thank god we’re so close to the end of arc 7 I can almost taste it. Anyway, this is a fun little chapter with some deeper stuff in it that I quite like. So I won’t keep you from it. Enjoy!

Previous: https://minijenn.tumblr.com/post/186319809934/universe-falls-chapter-68

***

Chapter 69: Crash Site Omega

KTIT GSYW GRFUZKD GA PUNU MKU TVQC RETF E YHWB FKHWZH HEZAA G SSOVKT YQTZ FCD CKAFE ST EBP YTCCHIXER NC ONHDIVIR RVOEBPW

With the drill finally finished as it was, no one saw too much of a reason to put off using it for too much longer. Especially considering they were on something of a tight time constraint when it came to dealing with the problem it was created to subdue. Still, before sending the machine on its maiden voyage through the surface of the Earth, pretty much everyone had mutually agreed on preforming a few final tests on it first. Given their close involvement with the technical side of the drill, this was a task that Peridot, Pearl, and Ford in particular had volunteered to undertake. To further ensure the drill’s soundness and stability was up to par, the trio had invited McGucket to come over to the barn to help them with their checks, given that he was largely responsible for creating the machine’s blueprints in the first place. For the most part, their tests all went off without any hitches, and save for a few minor quick tweaks and fixes here and there, the group soon enough decided that the drill was finally ready to plunge through the depths of the Earth to rid it of the threat the Cluster posed once and for all.

But that was a feat for tomorrow. For tonight, everyone had decided to take the rare opportunity to relax and rest up for the daunting task ahead of them instead. The Gems, kids, and scientists alike had all gathered around a strong, roaring campfire, the drill proudly reflecting the flames as it sat positioned nearby. True, they all had plenty to fret and worry about, from their no doubt dangerous trek down to the Cluster in just a few hours, to the dreadful alliance between a certain demon and a certain Diamond they still knew so very little about. But for just one night, they had all mutually agreed to let those fearful thoughts go and simply take some time to revel in their successful project and enjoy each other’s company, in the hopes that they’d have even more time to do so once the Cluster was no more.

A round of amused laughter arose from the group around the fire, largely as a result of Peridot’s first attempt at trying to roast a marshmallow over the open flames. Of course, no one had warned the green Gem to not shove the treat into her mouth while it was still on fire, resulting in a panic that was more than entertaining for everyone watching on.

“Gah…” Peridot let out a sigh of relief as she finally managed to cool down. “Why is it that every edible object on Earth is so… scalding hot?”

“Aw, Peri, clearly you’ve never had ice cream before,” Mabel remarked, still chuckling. “It’ll change everything you thought you knew about Earth food, trust me.”

“…But that doesn’t make any sense,” the green Gem frowned, confused. “Ice is a solid object. It can’t be ‘creamed’!”

Of course, this observation only elicited another bout of laughter from the rest of the group, much to Peridot’s continued bafflement. Even so, the subject was soon changed by Steven as he glanced over at the drill with a small, content smile.

“We actually did it,” he said, looking to the others warmly. “We built a drill, all on our own!”

“Well, we couldn’t have done it without my technological expertise,” Peridot proclaimed somewhat haughtily. She recanted somewhat, however, upon noticing some of the rather critical glances being sent her way. “A-and without Pearl’s surprisingly invaluable assistance.”

“And without Ford’s immense knowledge of advanced machinery,” Pearl added pointedly.

“Or without Fiddleford’s impressive engineering experience,” Ford finished, sending his old partner a knowing smile.

“Aw shucks,” McGucket scratched at his beard humbly. “We all pitched in to get this here dohicky up n’ runnin’. Its something every one of ya’ll should be plumb proud of.”

“You’re darn right I’m proud,” Amethyst smirked, reclining back in her seat. “I helped lift a ton of old junk around to help get that sucker built. Better be worth it.”

“We’ll find out tomorrow,” Garnet remarked, vague as ever.

“W-well, even if it doesn’t work-”

“Which it needs to, otherwise we’re all DOOMED!” Peridot interupted Steven dramatically.

“Thanks for the reminder, Peridot,” Dipper deadpanned lightly. “Its not like that thought hasn’t been looming over our heads for the past several days now.”

“Hmph, well if its not then it certainly should be,” the green Gem retorted, not following his clear sarcasm. “Otherwise, what was the point of any of this?”

“…Even if it doesn’t work, which hopefully, it does,” Steven picked up where he had left off. “It was still a lot of fun to work together to build it. Even if we did run into a few… bumps along the way.”

“Yeah, like when you guys beat the snot out of each other in giant robots to decide who’s in charge,” Amethyst grinned, putting her fists up playfully.

“Or when Dipper had to go ask his girlfriend for help to get that shiny titan’s ore stuff,” Mabel teased, elbowing her brother wryly.

“Mabel, for the last time, Pacifica is not my girlfriend!” Dipper huffed defensively.

“Not yet anyway…” Garnet muttered with a small grin, though no one really heard her.

“Well, regardless of a few setbacks, at least this time, we didn’t have to resort to getting parts for the drill from Crash Site O-” Pearl cut herself off before she could continue, particularly upon seeing the wide eyed glances her teammates, Ford, and McGucket were sending her way. Glances that were more than enough to get her to change her tune entirely. “O-oh nothing! Never mind! Did someone say something about a crash site? Please, there’s nothing like that anywhere near here, I can assure you!”

“Niiiiice, P,” Amethyst scoffed, amused. “Real subtle, just like always.”

“Crash site?” Dipper asked, instantly curious. “What kind of crash site? And what did you mean about getting parts from it?”

“Is it a car crash?” Mabel asked, equally intrigued. “A bus crash? A blimp crash?! Oh, maybe it’s a big boat crash, just like in that movie where the boats hits an ice burg and the dreamy guy dies at the end. Augh! I can never get through that one without crying!”

“Neither can I!” Steven added just as emotionally.

“Ok, so can we get back to this whole crash site thing?” Dipper interjected, still intent to know more. “Please?”

The adults among the group all exchanged something of an apprehensive glance, as if they were all in on a secret they weren’t entirely sure they wanted to divulge. Which, by most accounts, was actually quite close to the truth of the matter. However, when they finally did make the unspoken decision to break the seal on this secret, Ford was ultimately the one to do it, albeit not in the way any of the kids were hoping for.

“The ‘crash site’ Pearl was referring to is… properly known as Crash Site Omega,” the author began, treading the topic carefully. “Or at least, that’s what I personally decided to call it years ago. And as for what it is…. Well… that’s… confidential.”

A unified groan of disappointment arose from all three of the kids, and even Peridot, who had gotten rather invested in the mysterious matter herself. “Oh, come on!” the green Gem whined petulantly. “You can’t just bring up something with a self-important name like ‘Crash Site Omega’ and then not tell any of us what it is! That just isn’t fair!”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’m totally with Peridot on this one,” Dipper agreed, crossing his arms. “I thought there weren’t supposed to be anymore secrets between any of us, so why are you guys still keeping this one?”

“That’s simple,” Garnet spoke up calmly. “If you kids actually knew what and where Crash Site Omega really was, then there’s no doubt you’d all try to go there yourselves. And believe me when I say its far too dangerous for any of you to try to go alone.”

“Whoa, so its gotta be something really cool then!” Mabel gasped, fascinated. “All of the super-dangerous places we end up going to usually are!”

“Yeah, its pretty cool,” Amethyst remarked casually.

“Amethyst!” Pearl hissed at the purple Gem through her teeth.

“What? It is.”

“W-well, even if it is cool, I’m afraid you kids don’t need to know anything more about it,” Ford concluded succinctly. “At least not right now.”

Once again, the kids all unanimously deflated at this, clearly dejected by this barring of such potentially interesting information. Even so, Ford and the Gems were firm in their resolve to keep the knowledge of Crash Site Omega and anything pertaining to it to themselves. McGucket, on the other hand, clearly had quite a bit more sympathy towards the kids’ shared sense of disappointment, even if he did understand just as much as the others did that withholding the truth was for their own wellbeing and safety. Which was why he was the first to make a concentrated effort in trying to make up for it somehow.

“Well, gee…” the inventor frowned knowingly. “I sure do hate to see you kids wearin’ such sour faces. Y’know, maybe we can’t tell ya’ll much about Crash Site Omega itself… but I don’t see why we can’t tell ya about the rip-roarin’ adventure all of us had the first time Stanford and the others all dragged me out there.”

“Oh! Yes, I… suppose there’s no harm in telling you kids about that,” Pearl said thoughtfully. “Just as long as we don’t divulge… too many details.”

“Yeah, sure I mean, it’s a pretty fun story anyway,” Amethyst shrugged. “Ya know, outside of the several times where we almost died!”

“Oh, come now!” Ford exclaimed, disgruntled. “We didn’t inch close to death that many times on that expedition. Especially when compared to some of our… other endeavors back then.”

“Hey, hey!” Mabel interupted, raising her hand enthusiastically. “We wanna know about how you guys almost died! Right, guys?”

“Yeah!” Steven chimed in excitedly. “Well, ok, maybe less about the whole dying part and more about your adventure. It sounds like it was a lot of fun!”

“Yeah, sure I guess that works,” Dipper added somewhat halfheartedly before muttering the rest of his statement. “Though telling us what Crash Site Omega really is would be way better…”

“Well, for now, this will just have to suffice,” the author said, taking in a deep, leveling breath before beginning the harrowing tale. “It was over thirty years ago. The Gems and I were just starting to conceptualize our plans for the portal, and Fiddleford had only arrived just a few days prior to lend us a helping hand on the project…”

***

1981

Ford could scarcely remember a time in his life when he had been more excited about the future than he was now. His research of Gravity Falls and its countless unique anomalies had already proven to be a massive success and then some, thanks to the invaluable help provided by the Crystal Gems over the past few years. But the bold endeavor he was setting out to undertake now was bound to completely blow all of that entirely out of the water. With this machine, he was certain that they’d be able to uncover untold secrets about both the known and unknown universe, opening the door to scientific marvels unlike any ever seen before. But before such a grand dimensional leap could be taken, said machine had to be built first.

That was where the help of his friends came in. Already, Rose and the other Gems had readily agreed to help on the project in any way they could, help that Ford knew he’d never be able to thank them enough for. But what was even more exciting was the fact that his treasured old colleague Fiddleford had heeded his call to join the cause as well, journeying all the way from California to Oregon. From the moment the inventor arrived a few short days ago, the author had already been enjoying his friend’s welcome company and amusing quirks immensely, from his knack for solving Cubic’s Cubes in record time, to surprising skill on the banjo. Even if Fiddleford carried a few habits that Ford wasn’t particularly fond of, such as chewing tobacco and his overly-superstitious nature, he couldn’t deny that the brilliant calculations the inventor was contributing to the portal project had already made it more than worth the author’s time to ask him to lend his aid.

In fact, it was through one of those very calculations that Fiddleford had managed to pinpoint a critical flaw in Ford’s plans for the machine thus far. Apparently, the purposed portal’s highly advanced technical caliber would require an equally advanced power source to keep it running. A Temporal Displacement Hyperdrive, to be exact.

“Which means we might as well pull the reigns on this project here n’ now,” Fiddleford shook his head mournfully as he slapped his notebook shut. “On account of the fact that humanity is ten thousand years away from even comin’ anywhere close to even tryin’ to invent one!”

Despite how distraught his partner was over this insurmountable setback, Ford merely grinned confidently, as if he wasn’t even bothered by it at all. Which, by and large, he absolutely wasn’t. “Well then, aren’t we incredibly luck that I just so happen to have a handful of friends who know exactly where we can find such a device.”

Needless to say that Fiddleford was beyond baffled by such a bold claim. Even so, Ford wasn’t entirely keen on spoiling such a monumental surprise so easily, which was why he implored the inventor to return early the next morning, and, more importantly, come ready for a grand expedition that would span two days at least, if not more.

Confused as he was by such an odd request, Fiddleford complied, arriving at the author’s home at dawn the next day. The inventor was still rather sleepy as he stepped into the den, camping pack slung over his shoulder as he readily accepting the piping hot cup of coffee Ford offered him. “So are we settin’ out on whatever skullduggerin’ misadventure you have planned for us any time soon, Stanford?” Fiddleford grumbled upon noticing that the author was making no clear steps towards leaving. “Cause if not, then I might as well just mosey on back to bed.”

“Oh, don’t worry, Fiddleford,” Ford assured with a knowing smirk. “We’ll be leaving very shortly. Just as soon as my… mm… friends arrive.”

“The same ‘friends’ you mentioned yesterday, I’m guessin’?” Fiddleford raised an eyebrow.

“The very ones,” the author nodded. “They’ve been gone on a lengthy mission across the globe since before you arrived a few days ago. I… had planned on introducing you all under slightly different circumstances, but this works every bit as well.”

“…Do I even want to know what you originally planned for us meeting?”

“Oh, through a group outing to study Gravity Falls’ invasive barf fairy population, of course.”

“…Charmin’,” Fiddleford deadpanned. “Real charmin’.”

At that moment, an enthusiastic knock on the front door resounded throughout the house, one that Ford didn’t hesitate to hurry to answer. “Ah, perfect timing! They’re here!” The author stopped short just shy of the door to turn to his partner one more time. “Fiddleford, I’d like for you meet none other than… the Crystal Gems!”

With that, he boldly opened the door to reveal a quartet of women that Fiddleford had to do a double take on just to make sure they were really real. Their ethereal, frankly magical appearances were truly something to behold, and yet there they stood, crowded in the doorframe, the largest and pinkest among them also bearing the widest, brightest smile as she greeted the author warmly. “Ford!” she exclaimed, happily sweeping him up into a tight, friendly hug.

“Heh, y-yes, its great to see you again too, Rose!” Ford laughed tightly, clearly caught off guard by the sudden, almost choking embrace. Fortunately, Rose was quick to release it to set the author back down on the ground. “So, how was Greenland?”

“Oh, you know,” Pearl spoke off with an offhanded smirk. “Nowhere near as green as its neighbor right across the sea, Iceland, usually is. But tolerable, all the same.”

“But its waaaaaay better to be back home,” Amethyst said, leaping up onto one of her favorite perches: Ford’s shoulders. “Ya got anything for me this time, science man?”

“Well…” the author rummaged through is camping pack for a moment. “I do have these jelly beans, but they’re for me to take on the-” Without any warning, the purple Gem snatched the bag of snacks out of his hand, tossing it into her mouth and swallowing it whole. “Well, they were for the trip… Ah well, either way, there’s someone here I’d really like you to meet.” Ford stepped aside so that the Gems could finally see the clearly awestruck Fiddleford, who honestly had no idea how to really react to them at all. “Rose, Garnet, Amethyst, Pearl, this is my former college classmate and close personal friend, Fiddleford McGucket. Fiddleford, this is Garnet, Amethyst, Pearl, and of course, Rose Quartz. Otherwise known as the Crystal Gems.”

Fiddleford took in a deep breath at this, adjusting his glasses to properly greet these bizarre women. “I-I’m much obliged to meet ya-”

“Oh, wow!” Rose interupted, stars in her eyes as she regarded the inventor. “There’s another Ford!”

“W-what?!” Ford and Fiddleford both exclaimed in confused unison.

“Well, you said so yourself,” the pink Gem pointed out innocently. “You’re Stanford,” she nodded to the author before pointing at the inventor. “And you’re Fiddleford. Which means now there’s two Fords! How exciting!”

“Oh! Can we call this one Fiddle?” Amethyst suggested, tugging on Fiddleford’s jacket sleeve before doing the same to Ford’s lab coat. “And we can call science man Stan!”

“You most certainly cannot!” Ford snapped, his tone surprisingly harsh as he pulled his coat away from the purple Gem. The other Gems and even Fiddleford all looked to him in apt surprise, all of them clearly wondering where such sudden severity had come from, though before the author was pressed to explain it, he was quick to change the subject altogether. “Anyway… Rose, I’m glad you’re here. Fiddleford has brought an important matter concerning our newest pet project to our attention, a matter I’m… more than fairly confident you’ll be able to help out with.”

“Oh really?” Rose asked, naturally curious as she looked to the inventor. “And what’s that?”

“Well, to even get this machine ya’ll wanna build started, you’re gonna need to get yourselves a Temporal Displacement Hyperdrive,” Fiddleford explained with a frown. “But I don’t know where in the world we’re ever gonna-”

“A Temporal Displacement Drive?” Pearl spoke up, crossing her arms with a scoff. “Please, give us an actual challenge here. Why, Stanford, I’m surprised you don’t already have one seeing as how they’re incredibly archaic by today’s standards.”

“Well, perhaps on your mysterious ‘Homeworld’ they are,” Ford retorted with just as teasing of a grin as the one the white Gem was sending him. “But here on Earth, technology like that is a bit… harder to come by.”

“Wha—Homeworld?” Fiddleford grabbed the author by the arm, lowering his voice somewhat. “Stanford, what in the name of Sweet Sally Sue are you on about right now?”

“Oh, did I not tell you?” Ford looked back to his bewildered partner before nodding back to the eager group of Gems before him. “Despite their near human-like appearances, the Crystal Gems aren’t from Earth. In fact, you might even say they’re-”

“ALIENS?!” Fiddleford gasped, shocked by this revelation as he stared at each of the Gems with huge eyes.

“There’s that word again,” Garnet remarked, crossing her arms.

“I wonder what it means…” Rose mused, fascinated.

“Yes,” the author said, still sending the inventor a satisfied, almost goading grin over the fact that he had managed to befriend such a special extraterrestrial group all on his own. “Aliens. But completely friendly aliens, I can assure you.”

“Boy howdy, are they ever!” Fiddleford exclaimed, slapping his knee in newfound excitement as he rushed up to each of the Gems to readily shake their hands. “Ya know, from the time I was a youngin’ I’ve always wondered about you space folks, ever since my cousin Thistlebelt said his Grammy Louise was quote-on-quote ‘taken by them saucer people’. Everyone else in the family said it was a bunch of hogwash, but I never stopped believin’ that life in other worlds outside our own existed, and you ladies are livin’, breathin’ proof of that!”

“Oh, uh, well, thank you,” Rose laughed, amused. “But…”

“We don’t breathe,” Garnet said, stoically and succinctly.

“It’s true,” Ford added, noting Fiddleford’s continued dumbfounded expression. “They don’t. Or at least they don’t need to. Same goes with sleeping and eating. Why, if I was anywhere near as infallible as the Gems here are, then I’d have enough energy to solve every unexplained phenomenon in the universe and then some!”

“And then you’d complain about bein’ bored the second that you did,” Fiddleford remarked with a wry grin. “Just like ya did when you breezed through all of the coursework in your second semester of Applied Quantum Phase Theory in less than a week after the class started.”

“Clearly, a waste of a semester,” Ford scoffed. “Especially when taking Fifth Dimensional Calculus and Hyper-Advanced Engineering would have aided our cause with this portal much more…”

“Speaking of which,” Pearl interjected. “If we really do need that Hyperdrive, then, w-well…” She hesitated, as if anxious to continue. Anxiety that Rose and Garnet at least seemed to both share on some level as they all averted eye contact with one another. “Stanford, you know where to find it by now.”

“Well, yes, I do,” the author nodded. “But seeing as how this is going to be Fiddleford’s first expedition to Crash Site Omega, I figured why not commemorate it by all of us going out there together? As a team?”

“Crash Site Omega?” Fiddleford inquired, curious. Ford provided him a brief whispered answer, one that only served to floor the inventor even more than he already was when he realized exactly what it was.

“No…”

“Yes,” the author grinned, amused.

“S-so it’s really…?”

“Mm hm.”

“A-and they came in…?”

“They did.”

“…Well, I gotta admit to ya, Stanford,” Fiddleford said after a beat of amazed silence. “I didn’t come here this morning thinkin’ that my entire perception on reality would be blown wide open like its just been. S-so thank you for that, I suppose.”

“You’re very welcome!” the author chimed before turning back to the Gems. “So the way I see it, it’ll take us two days to hike both out to the crash site and to get back since the its central warp hub is still down, so we should probably head out now to catch good daylight and-”

“Um… actually, Ford…” Rose spoke up apprehensively. “I’m not so sure if we should keep going out there like we have been. It really is pretty dangerous, especially for humans, and if we keep bothering it, it’ll probably only get worse. So… I think we should just…” The pink Gem trailed off upon catching sight of the disappointed, rather pleading glances both Ford and Fiddleford were sending her way, both of them clearly eager to see this intriguing crash site and claim the powerful Hyperdrive contained within. Glances that, against all odds, were able to make Rose change her tune much more easily than expected. “Ohhhh… ok…” she huffed relentingly. “You two win. We’ll go get that Hyperdrive.”

“Excellent!” Ford proclaimed as Fiddleford let out a large sigh of relief. “Then let’s not waste another minute! Our expedition begins… now!”

“Woo! Expedition! Expedition!” Amethyst cheered as her and Garnet followed the author and the inventor out the door. “Hey, Garnet, what’s a expedition?”

“Rose, are you sure this is such a good idea…?” Pearl asked, stopping the pink Gem briefly before they could head out as well. “After all, the crash site is… w-well… you know…”

“I do…” Rose frowned, placing a gentle hand on the white Gem’s shoulder before breaking out into a small smile. “But what can I say? You know I can never say no to humans, Pearl, they’re so adorable!”

“That’s what you keep saying…” Pearl muttered with an exasperated sigh as she trailed after her liege, their ‘expedition’ to the mystery that was Crash Site Omega at last underway.

***

The fresh Oregon morning air was more than enough to completely invigorate the small motley crew of scientists and Gems as they set out on their quest. Since neither Ford or Fiddleford had a vehicle of their own, their trek would largely be on foot, something that only the inventor seemed to mind as they began their hike along the granite pass. While Ford was able to keep up with the tireless Gems just fine thanks to his rigorous daily physical regiment, Fiddleford was much less active in most things save for his mind and his mechanical work. As easily worn and winded as he was, the inventor wasn’t afraid to let his exhaustion show, especially as he purposed the idea of building robotic legs to let them do the work of walking for him.

Fortunately for Fiddleford, however, their trek only lasted a few hours before they found themselves on the other side of town at Lake Gravity Falls. Seeing as the serene shore was as good a place as any to take a break, that’s exactly what the group did (after documenting a bizarre Plaidypus they happened across along the way, as well investigating as the mystery of a possible beast laying in wait under the lake’s sole island). Even so, the inventor greatly appreciated the much-needed breather as he took the time to enjoy the lunch he had packed, at least until Amethyst snuck over and began rifling through it, an attempt that Pearl tried her best to thwart as Garnet watched on, amused as ever by her teammate’s antics.

With Fiddleford and the Gems as distracted as they were, Ford took the opportunity to slip away to jot down a few offhand notes and observations in his latest journal. He was just finishing off their speculator findings on the possibly quite dangerous island head beast lurking just below the unsuspecting waters when he began casually sketching out the peaceful shoreline itself, writing down a short description to go with it.

“Despite this bone-chilling creature, I couldn’t help but enjoy the scenery. There is no other place in Gravity Falls I would rather be than the lake. It reminds me of my childhood and Glass Shard Beach…”

Of Glass Shard Beach and sticky, sandy days spent there. Of briny seas and smoggy, sunny skies. Of just the two of them, exploring the tiny world they’d always known but planning for so much more beyond it. Of working on the ambitious pet project together that would someday finally get them there: the Stan O’ War.

Ford sighed almost wistfully, glancing over across the lake again before he began sketching out a simple sailboat on the bottom half of the page. Absently, he annotated it with an amusing youthful anecdote, one that he made sure to inscribe in code, just in case. He had just about finished it too, when a sudden shadow cast over him, catching the other quite off guard out of his deep thoughts.

“What are you working on over here?” Rose asked with a warm smile as she stood over the author, curiously glancing down at the journal in his hand. While Ford normally would have been eager to share his research with the pink Gem, instead he hastily scribbled over the boat he had drawn, closing the book and with it, his reminiscing thoughts.

“O-oh, nothing,” the author hastily said. “Just… foolishly losing myself in the past, I suppose.”

“Hm…” Rose mused as she took a seat on the coarse sand alongside him. “I wouldn’t call that ‘foolish’. After all, I sometimes do that too.”

“Hopefully not too often,” Ford joked with a brief hint of levity. “If what you told me is true, then you have quite a lengthy past to get lost in.”

The pair shared a short laugh at this, though as it faded as the author’s tone turned thoughtful. “…You know, I’ve never asked you… what is it like, to have lived for so long? Existing for hundreds of thousands of years like you and the other Gems have is far beyond any sort of known human comprehension so, I can’t help but be a little curious about it.”

Rose was silent for a moment, keeping her sights set on the sparkling lake ahead of them before replying flippantly. “To be honest? Its… boring. When a Gem is made, they’re supposed to be only one thig, have only one purpose for their entire existence. Thousands of years spending day in and day out in the exact same way without anything ever even changing. But you? Humans? You get to have an entirely different experience every single day! Your life isn’t set in stone like a Gem’s is, its constantly in motion! Its so much more exciting! And… ever since I first came here to Earth, that’s exactly what I’ve been trying to do to: to have a unique, special kind of experience each and every day. And so far, I’d say I’ve been doing a pretty good job of it thanks to people like you, Ford.”

“Hmph,” the author glanced away, aptly bashful. “I’d pin your success less on me and more on Gravity Falls. As surrounded by such fantastic anomalies as we are, there’s no way you could have a dull, uninteresting day here, even if you tried.”

“Exactly,” Rose chuckled. “Why else do you think we’ve stayed here so long?”

“Speaking of which…” Ford began a bit leadingly as he looked back down at the journal in his lap. “Where exactly were you and the other Gems… before you came to Gravity Falls?”

“Oh, I thought I already told you,” the pink Gem said. “We mostly wandered around all over the Earth, exploring different, beautiful places, meeting all sorts of amazing people-”

“Yes, yes, you did tell me about all that before,” Ford interupted, unable to push his curiosity aside. “I’m talking about before that. Before you came to Earth.”

“O-oh…” Rose faltered, her pink locks casting shadows over her eyes as her voice grew soft and almost unsteady. “W-well… before that… I was—we lived on Homeworld…”

“Ah yes, Homeworld,” Ford nodded, eager to know more about this distant planet the other Gems spoke so very little about. “And what was it like there? Quite different from the Earth, I imagine, I mean it is an entirely different planet.”

“Yes, i-it’s… very different, to say the least…” Rose muttered, almost whispered. For several long, lingering moments, she said nothing else on the matter, and for a good while it seemed like she had no intentions of doing so at all. Ford was just about ready to prompt her with more questions on the mysterious planet, but right before they could, a certain purple Gem suddenly jumped right into the space between the two of them.

“Hey, look at me! I’m Fiddle Man!” Amethyst exclaimed, showing off the inventor’s glasses that she had perched on the elongated nose she had shapeshifted to mimic his. “Howdy, howdy, howdy!”

“Hey!” The purple Gem took off the moment she noticed Fiddleford blindly chasing after her. “Give ‘em back, ya little-”

The inventor didn’t have a chance to finish his threat before he inevitably followed Amethyst into the lake, tripping and falling face-first into the shallows as the purple Gem surfaced alongside him, laughing madly all the while. “Amethyst! Give that human his vision aids back immediately!” Pearl scolded with a frustrated huff as she stormed over.

“They’re called glasses, Pearl,” Garnet remarked, coolly adjusting her own.

“Well, it looks like everyone’s starting to get restless,” Rose laughed, more than glad to change the subject. “We should probably get going. We still have a lot of ground to cover, after all.”

Ford frowned, even as Rose stood and offered a hand to help him up. Even so, despite the lack of any substantial answers to his insatiable curiosity, he complied, accepting her help as he offered his aid in gathered the others so they could continue on their way once more. And yet, the author couldn’t help but glance out at the lake one last time before they left it behind, hoping that he’d still get those answers, answers he knew the pink Gem was still hiding from him, sooner or later.

***

The rest of the afternoon took the group out of the midsummer heat and into a much cooler setting instead: a set of hidden tunnels secreted away behind the town’s famous waterfall. The ancient caves were a find that the Gems had first introduced Ford to a few years back, the drawings etched on the walls dating their formation back to early human history (which the Gems themselves were present for). Along the way, they happened across a rather large group of minute corrupted Gem monsters, which the author had decided to dub ‘geodites’; the tiny creatures were more than numerous and luminous enough to light their way through the rest of the tunnels. And by the time they finally emerged at the top of the falls, the sun was just starting to set, giving way to a crisp, warm, lovely evening. Which was why, with the vast view of Gravity Falls stretching out below them, the easy decision was made to set up camp for the night right then and there.

While the Gems didn’t really need to rest like Ford and Fiddleford did, they were still more than happy to help them set up their clifftop campsite. With a roaring fire built, the group gathered around it to relax and chat, all while gazing up at the countless arrays of stars and the constellations hidden therein dotting the dark, lovely night sky above them.

“Golly, what a night…” Fiddleford remarked between spoonfuls of beans out of the can he had just heated up over the fire. “We don’t get stars like these in Palo Alto, that’s for sure.”

“Palo Alto?” Rose asked, curious. “Where’s that?”

“A few states down south in California,” Fiddleford informed. “They’ve just started callin’ that part of it the ��Silicon Valley’, as a matter o’ fact.”

“Why?” Pearl asked. “Is there a higher than usual concentration of silicon there?”

“Well, no, it’s on account of-”

“Its because it has a higher than usual concentration of ‘upstart inventors’,” Ford interupted with a knowing smirk. “Much like Fiddleford himself here.”

“Oh, ha ha, very funny, Stanford,” Fiddleford retorted dryly. “But Palo Alto also has a lot more to it than a bunch of borin’ ol’ eggheads. It’s also where my darlin’ wife and my lil’ Tater Tot are.”

“Ooo, tater tots!” Amethyst quipped obliviously. “I just learned what those things are the other day when I snuck into the diner. They’re so good and cold and crunchy!”

“You’re supposed to eat them hot, Amethyst, not frozen,” Ford pointed out with a concerned frown.

“Whaaaat?! Oh man, that sounds even better! I’ve gotta try that! I’m totally gonna break into that diner again when we get back.”

“I’m not talkin’ about tater tots Tater Tots,” Fiddleford shook his head with a small chuckle. “I’m talkin’ about my son, Tate.” Upon noticing the somewhat blank looks all of the Gems were sending him, the inventor elaborated. “Ya know, my family? Any of you ladies got any family yourselves?”

“No,” Rose answered almost immediately, her tone surprisingly sharp.

“Gems don’t really do ‘family’,” Garnet added quite stoically.

“O-oh…” Fiddleford glanced away rather awkwardly. “Well, all the same, I can’t wait to get back to mine! Why, once we’re done with this here project of ours, I have plans to skedaddle back home to ‘em and finally start patenting all of the robotics projects I have in the works.”

“Robotics?” Ford asked incredulously. “What practical use could that have in a common market?”

“Outside of militaristic weapons grade training?” Pearl added, though she was met with several bewildered glances at this. “What?”

“Aw, I got plenty of ideas in mind!” Fiddleford exclaimed zealously. “Ideas that are bound to make people’s lives better all ‘round the globe! Plus… it’ll be a decent bonus to finally be makin’ enough to afford a nice place with a screen door that ain’t broken like the one we had at the ol’ McGucket family homestead back in Tennessee.”

“Your ideas sound lovely, Fiddleford,” Rose smiled, enthused by such altruistic plans. “Ford, what are you going to do once our machine is done?”

“I think you mean once my Grand Unified Theory of Weirdness is proven indisputably,” Ford corrected with a knowing grin. “After its all said and done, I’m considering returning back home to the east to publish my findings about Gravity Falls and the source of its strangeness to the world.”

“Wait… you’re… going to leave?” the pink Gem asked, her smile fading altogether at this.

“F-for a time, yes,” the author glanced away, suddenly flustered. “But I’m sure I’ll be back around these parts sooner or later. Especially since I’ll have presidents and prizewinners alike practically begging me to explain all of the oddities we’ve uncovered to them. Just think of it! Me, rubbing elbows with the most elite of the elite! Debating politics with Reagan, discussing turtleneck fashion with Carl Sagan! And better yet, seeing the looks on the faces of everyone who ever doubted me!”

“Gosh, Stanford, those sure are some big dreams,” Fiddleford remarked with a smirk. “I’d expect nothin’ less from you, but… there’s still one thing I don’t understand.”

“And what’s that?”

“Well, from what I’ve seen of them journals of yours, it already looks like you’ve discovered more than enough amazin’ things to make you famous and then some,” the inventor explained, briefly nodding over at the Gems. “These ladies right here are a testament to that if nothin’ else, I mean, shucks, they’re literal space aliens.”

“Would you both stop calling us that?” Pearl huffed, annoyed.

“I guess what I’m tryin’ to figure out is… is this ‘grand theory’ of yours even really necessary?” Fiddleford continued, frowning. “Why not just publish your findings now, profit off that, settle down right here in Gravity Falls, and start a family of your own…?” At this, the inventor inclined his head rather leadingly at Rose, something that the pink Gem didn’t really notice, though the author understood the implication loud and clear.

Which was why he was completely powerless to let out a loud, blunt laugh at the very thought. “Oh, Fiddleford, don’t be silly!” Ford chuckled, shaking his head. “I’ll be the first to admit that romance is far more baffling to me than the greatest mysteries of the universe!” The author waited a beat until Rose was distracted by a small, side conversation with the other Gems to lower his voice to a whisper to the inventor. “Besides, you heard it yourself; Gems don’t ‘do’ family.”

“Hmph, and apparently, neither do you,” Fiddleford remarked, dissatisfied as he crossed his arms.

“So, Ford,” Rose interjected with a small, amused laugh. “Garnet wants to know… how exactly is romance ‘baffling’?”

“Because it sure isn’t to me,” Garnet said, adjusting her shades mysteriously.

“W-well, it just always seemed so… frivolous to me,” Ford shrugged, clearly embarrassed over having to explain himself on such a personal matter. “I mean, who even has time for such flights of fancy in the first place when there’s far more important matters to attend to?”

“Oh? Like what?” Pearl asked with a bit of a teasing grin. “Playing that probability-heavy dungeons game you showed me the other day?”

“N-no!” Ford exclaimed defensively. “W-well, at least not entirely. What I’m talking about is perusing something much grander than any mere momentary love affair: the answers to the most baffling mysteries human history has ever known! And I’m going to be the one to find those answers once and for all. Why should I settle for simplicity when I can just as easily sail to the stars!?”

“There’s nothing wrong with simplicity, Ford,” Rose grinned gently. “In fact, its one of the things I love most about the Earth. Everything here works so well with everything else. It all just… fits together to create a planet that just feels… so complete and so perfect in so many different ways, I can’t even begin to list them all!”

“But it can hardly compare to all of the other incredible sights you’ve must have seen among the endless cosmos, right?” Ford pressed, curious as ever. “After all, the Earth, perhaps barring Gravity Falls as the sole exception, is so… mundane when pitted against the vast depths of space, places humans have never even dreamed of seeing before, including your very own Homeworld! You’ve been here on Earth for thousands of years now… don’t you ever miss what lies beyond it?”

Rose paused for a moment, seeming to mull over this as she gazed up at the distant, twinkling stars far above them. But when she finally did give her answer, it was with a solid, confident smile as she returned her gaze back down to the sprawling view of the town far below them. “Why would I ever miss Homeworld when I’m already home?”

Despite his best efforts, this was a question Ford couldn’t find an answer to. It was at that moment that the author began to realize, perhaps for the very first time, just how different the pink Gem’s worldview was from his own. It was undeniable that Rose was quite content with her peaceful lot on planet Earth, far removed from the mysterious, exciting grandeur of the cosmos and her former interstellar home. It was a sentiment the other Crystal Gems seemed to carry, but it was one that Ford couldn’t quite understand. For much of his life, the author had felt limited in some way; limited by the scope of his small hometown, limited by the low standards of his family around him, limited even by his own scientific knowledge (at least until his muse fortunately came around to help in that regard). In fact, he had grown so used to being limited that it was no wonder that breaking those limits wide open had long since been a high-ranking goal of his. He didn’t want to just be content to be, he wanted so much more than that. He wanted success, he wanted recognition, he wanted greatness. He would settle for nothing less.  

And while Ford knew the road to reaching such lofty ambitions wouldn’t be an easy one, he still preferred the road less traveled anyway, he always had. And, as he sat around the campfire, laughing and conversing with some of the people (or more accurately Gems) he trusted most, he couldn’t help but feel immensely grateful that he wouldn’t have to travel that road alone.

***

The next morning saw the group meeting with a mystery right off the bat. While getting in an early morning shave, Fiddleford had spotted the briefest flash of something in the woods behind him in his tiny mirror. Superstitious and skittish as he was, the inventor didn’t hesitate to alert Ford and the Gems about the possible intruder, which had vanished just as quickly as it had appeared. A careful search of the entire area turned up empty, but no one could deny they all felt the presence of some unknown creature or being lurking about, its mysterious nature matching closely to a longstanding local lumberjack legend known as the Hide-Behind. The creature had been a point of curiosity for both Ford and the Gems for quite some time, largely since it had reportedly never been clearly seen by anyone before. The most anyone was able to find of it was they quickly packed up their camp were its strange footprints in the dirt, accompanied by its bizarre howl echoing through the trees as the trees. Needless to say it was enough to set the entire group on edge, even the usually intrepid Gems, who were all on the verge of summoning their weapons for self-defense, just in case the Hide-Behind suddenly decided to come out of hiding after all…

Fortunately though, they weren’t beset by any such danger as they finally made their way out of the woods and into more open expanses. Rose took point of the group from here, her manner oddly tense as she began leading the last leg of the journey to the crash site. Contrasting to the pink Gem, however, Ford and Fiddleford were both growing gradually more excited the closer they got to their destination. The pair engaged in enthused speculation about the vessel they were heading to all the way there, a conversation that the Gems largely refused to join in, even despite the many questions posed their way. In fact, they only seemed to grow even more dodgy as they finally reached the deep, oddly-shaped valley where their prize awaited: Crash Site Omega itself.

“We’re here,” Rose reported quietly, coming to a stop at the center of the wide grassy area.

“Wait… this is it?” Fiddleford asked, confused.

“Indeed it is,” Ford chimed in with a daring grin as he approached the field’s only notable feature, a large, inconspicuous rock. “It looks like it hasn’t been touched since the last time we were here two years ago! How lucky!”

“Very lucky,” Garnet remarked stiffly, adjusting her shades.

“Now, let’s just move this aside, and…” the author trailed off as he pushed the rock, revealing a metallic panel beneath it. Removing it was just as easy, uncovering a square opening in the ground with a long ladder leading down into the darkness far below. “There we go. This should lead us down right through… what was it again?”

“The indefinite exhaust port,” Pearl remarked, crossing her arms and scowling.

“U-unbelievable…” Fiddleford said, his eyes wide as he stared down into the mysterious tunnel. “And here I thought ya’ll were yankin’ my chain with this crash site nonsense, but… b-but here it is! Plain as day!”

“Ugh, do we really gotta go down there again?” Amethyst asked with a huff. “Its so dark and smelly and boring…”

“Don’t worry, Amethyst, we won’t be down there very long,” Rose assured the youngest Gem with a small smile. “Will we?” she asked Ford in particular.

“We’re only here for the hyperdrive this time, so I would say this shouldn’t take too terribly long,” Ford mused.

“Good,” Pearl said somewhat sharply. “The sooner we leave this place behind, the better.”

With their shared intention to get in and get out as quickly as possible, the Gems entered the passageway first. Ford and Fiddleford followed after, both of them somewhat baffled as to why their companions seemed so wary of the crash site as a whole. Even so, they eagerly followed down into the depths, scaling down into the wreckage left behind from a vessel forgotten by time.

The structure’s practically ancient chrome interior, as untouched by the elements as it was, was largely pristine, if not heavily dusted and cobwebbed. The buried vessel was essentially a maze of various vast, twisting corridors, revealing nothing to what its exterior might have once looked like. Most of its electronic components were long-since defunct and its echoing halls were just as abandoned and dark, illuminated only by the glow from Pearl and Rose’s respective gemstones lighting the way. Ford and Fiddleford also had flashlights on hand, however, to further aid them in getting a better glimpse at their amazing surroundings; surroundings that, as far as they knew, next to no other humans had ever seen before.

“Golly, just look at this place!” Fiddleford exclaimed, his voice echoing off of the hallowed-out halls. “It’s like somethin’ straight outta Cosmic Conflicts! Just imagine what it must’ve looked like back in its hayday!”

“We don’t need to imagine,” Ford said, confident as he glanced over at the Gems. “Fortunately in this instance, we can get knowledge on the subject straight from the source.”

“O-oh, well, its not like any of us got here on something exactly like this…” Rose remarked with something of an uncomfortable laugh. “After all, Amethyst was made here on Earth, and-”

“Well, still, certainly it must be close to what a few of you might be familiar with,” the author implored. “It did come from Homeworld, after all, much like yourself, right, Rose?”

“Ah, um, w-well, yes, I suppose, but-”

“So how long does it typically take for a vessel like this to be built there?” Ford inquired, innocently curious. What the author failed to see were the other Gems almost rushing on ahead, only Rose hanging behind and growing more and more anxious with each question he posed to her. “How many lightyears do you estimate it could travel in a day?”

“F-Ford…” the pink Gem attempted to interject, but nothing could really stop the author’s eager inquiries at this point.

“Does it have any sort of external weapons systems? Maybe a layered holographic force-field?”

“Ford-” Rose tried again and by now even Fiddleford was sending his partner a worried warning glance. But even still Ford continued.

“What would it take to bring a rig like this down in the first place? What was its original function meant to be?”

“Stanford, please-”

A warship? Scouting vessel? Why did it even come here to Earth in the first pla-”

“Stanford! That’s enough!”

Rose’s harsh shout seemed to echo through the entire vessel, stopping the entire group dead in their tracks. Ford turned to the pink Gem, aptly started by her heavy command only to find her usually gentle expression set in a sharp, severe glare. A glare that was aimed directly at him.

“R-Rose?” he asked quite hesitantly, unsure of how to react.

“I said that’s enough,” Rose repeated just as sternly. “No more questions, let’s just get what we came here for, and go.”

And with that, the pink Gem pressed on ahead, the other Gems and even Fiddleford meekly following behind her. For all of the kindness Rose was known to show, her rare moments of rigidness were more than enough to intimidate just about anyone. Anyone save for Ford, that is.

“Why are you always like this?” Ford asked, a hint of fledgling frustration in his tone. “Every time I so much as bring up the topic of Homeworld to you, you never want to discuss it? Why? You’re always more than happy to share everything you know about every other Gem-related matter, so why not something as fundamentally simple as your own home?!”

“Because!” Rose snapped fiercely, far more angrier than the author had ever seen her before. “That’s NOT our home! Not anymore…” She sighed, her fury turning to what almost seemed like remorseful resignation as she turned away once more. “And it never will be again…”

“But why not?” Ford pressed, refusing to simply let the matter go. “Why won’t you just tell me something about it?!”

“…Fine,” Rose said, her back still turned and her tone still tense. “I’ll tell you the only thing you need to know about it: we left it behind, in every way. And we want to keep it that way, which is why you should do the same, Stanford.”

This time, the pink Gem was intent on making it quite clear that she wouldn’t discuss the matter any further as she simply walked away. Once again, Ford was prepared to keep the argument going, though what ultimately ended up stopping him turned out to be none other than Fiddleford. The inventor silently barred him with an outstretched arm, shaking his head in disapproval over just how far the author had been willing to push his curiosity. Far enough to the point that it had, in turn, pushed the pink Gem away.

Even so, that wasn’t something Ford was all too willing to admit. After all, the most he saw himself as guilty of was perhaps asking one too many sensitive questions. But as far as he was concerned, it was Rose’s fault for deeming those questions as too sensitive to answer in the first place. Certainly, the author rationalized, the pink Gem was being unfairly secretive when it came to the truth behind her former home. She had already shared so much about her kind with him in the past; so what could possibly be the reason behind her keeping this information to herself? It was a question Ford knew he needed the answer to, but it was an answer he wasn’t sure he was going to get, especially not now. Especially with Rose choosing to maintain her stubborn silence on all things Homeworld-related, the other Gems intent on doing the very same.

“Here it is…” Pearl announced diffidently as they all stepped into a large, heavily-wired chamber. “One Temporal Displacement Hyperdrive, as promised.”

“Hm…” Fiddleford stepped forward, carefully inspecting the surprisingly small device. The hyperdrive was hooked up to the ship’s now-defunct engine by a series of sturdy chords, the screen on its side still somehow functional based on the illuminated visage of four multi-colored diamonds. Silence still permeated the rest of the rest of the group as the inventor looked over it before finally breaking into a small, satisfied smile. “Yep, I’d reckon this oughta do the trick. All I gotta do is tweak around with a few of these here wires and…” He trailed off, carefully snipping through the chords with the clippers he had wisely brought along. Then, after loosening just a few bolts and screws, the inventor was able to not just release the drive, but also extract it, snuggly slipping it away into his backpack for safekeeping on the way back.

“We got what we came here for,” Rose concluded, her tone and matter both starkly hallow. “Let’s go home.”

None of the others, surprisingly not even Ford, argued with the pink Gem on this. Still, Fiddleford at the very least could tell that the author wanted to, his insistence to know what Rose refused to tell him was plain enough to see in his plaintiff expression alone. And yet, for whatever reason, Ford held his peace on the matter, instead silently following behind the Gems with his head down and his hands clenched into tight fists at his sides. Fiddleford always had a knack for spotting a pot that was about to boil over, and if there was any way to describe the tension currently standing between the author and the pink Gem in particular, it was that. Which meant that he could only hope that when it inevitably did, none of them would end up getting burned in its wake.

***

While both Fiddleford and the other Gems all shared the unspoken hope that the mood would finally lighten when they emerged from the crash site, much to their dismay it did anything but. In fact, if anything, Rose and Ford seemed to distance themselves even further, refusing to so much as even spare a glance at each other, lest their disagreement spike up once more. While the author’s manner was hard and bitter, the pink Gem’s expression seemed sad and pensive, though as different as their emotions were, they were equally matched in terms of disappointment.

This anxious stalemate seemed as though it was going to continue for the entire journey back from the crash site, a thought that was all but unbearable to the others. While this quest had started out on such a high, bright note, it seemed so unfortunate that, even despite their relative success in getting the hyperdrive, it was going to end on such a low, dour one. Which was why, even if the Gems didn’t share his own intention, Fiddleford decided to venture an attempt to at least get the author and the pink Gem on speaking terms again. A plan that he would have very well carried out had Ford not happened upon a discovery that would change the course of their entire trip altogether.

“Everyone, stay right where you are,” the author suddenly warned, stopping dead in his tracks. Curious, the others complied, turning towards him to see what the matter might have been. “No one make a single sound…” he whispered, his posture suddenly tense and his eyes wide as he stared through the thicket of trees straight ahead of them. While Garnet and Pearl exchanged a confused, yet quite glance at this, Amethyst, however, was easily the first to disregard that command entirely.

“What? What is it?” she asked bluntly, loudly. “Are we playin’ some kinda quiet game? Cause I thought we already have been doing that for hours now and-”

“Shhh!” Ford quickly reprimanded her, suddenly frantic. “I said quiet! The last thing we want to do is wake it up!”

“Wake what up, Stanford?” Fiddleford asked, his voice soft, yet aptly baffled.

By now, Rose had happened to catch a glimpse of what Ford had already seen, a small gasp escaping her as she pointed to the clearing straight ahead. “That.”

Fast asleep in the light of the sun pouring down upon it through the canopy of trees above was a creature, a monster that was nearly beyond all description. The beast was massive to say the least, easily larger than any of the Gems, even Rose herself. It was a burly, muscular, grotesque behemoth, its constant snores more akin to hulking growls as it rested tentatively, though it was clear that it could be ready to attack with its piercing claws and protruding fangs at a moment’s notice. An outcome that none of them wanted to see, especially considering exactly what this creature really was.

“A Gremloblin…” Ford was unable to keep himself from breaking into a bewildered grin at the sight of such an exciting discovery. “One of the rarest creatures in all of Gravity Falls! I’ve only ever read about them in old local lumberjack legends, I never thought I’d actually get to see one myself!”

“W-well, ya saw it, so we should probably get a goin’ before that thing stirs,” Fiddleford urged anxiously, refusing to take his eyes off the snoozing monster, lest it pounce when he wasn’t looking.

“Yes, yes, of course,” Ford agreed as he pulled his journal out of his coat. “After I jot down just a few cursory notes on it, maybe get a quick sketch…”

“Ford, I don’t think that’s a very good idea…” Rose noted with a concerned frown.

“Yes, those creatures are notoriously dangerous,” Pearl agreed. “We’ve fortunately never had to fight one before and we certainly wouldn’t want to have a reason to now.”

“And you won’t,” Ford assured, still creeping on ahead, pen already in hand. “I’ve heard Gremloblins are incredibly heavy sleepers, especially during their hibernation season, which just so happens to be during the summer months.”

“But Stanford-” Fiddleford pleaded tightly, nervously.

“Besides, I simply can’t pass up the opportunity to document such a unique find,” Ford continued, hardly listening to the others’ warnings. “I’ll make this quick, I promise.”

“Ford…” Rose admonished once more, though the author hardly listened as he continued inching forward. He had all but lost himself to sketching the monstrous Gremloblin out, engrossed in his research far more than his own safety, or the safety of his companions.

“M-Miss Quartz, can’t ya get him to give it a rest?” Fiddleford asked Rose as he cowered up against a nearby tree for cover. “If he wakes that critter up, he’ll get us all killed, for sure!”

“I don’t know about all that, but I do agree that this is far too dangerous,” the pink Gem stepped forward, ready to call upon her sword and shield, just in case, as she made another appeal to the author. “Ford, we should just leave that creature alone and move on before something bad happens.”

“Which will happen,” Garnet predicted firmly. “Trust me.”

“Then we’ll make sure to leave before it does,” Ford only barely glanced back over his shoulder.

“But that’s just it, you don’t know when it will happen!” Rose huffed, annoyed by the author’s insistent stubbornness. “We shouldn’t risk it, we need to leave, now.”

“Well you’re more than free to go on ahead. I’ll catch up with you when I’m done.”

While the pink Gem’s patience was usually seemingly boundless, it was more than clearly being tested here and now. “Stanford, why won’t you just listen to me?” she asked incredulously. “I’m trying to help you; I just want to keep you safe!”

“Oh how?” Ford asked just as bitingly as he turned to face her. “By denying me access to simple knowledge that would be invaluable to my research? Knowledge that I have a right to know, that I deserve to know!? Is that your idea of trying to ‘keep me safe’? Because if it is, then you should know that I never asked you to. In fact, I think you’ll find that I can handle much more than you give me credit for.”

“Ford…” Rose sighed, disgruntled and despondent. “You still don’t understand! And that’s exactly why you need to stop. A-and why… why I can’t tell you about…”

“About Homeworld?”

Rose flinched at this, unsure of what to even say. All the same, the author stared her down, silently demanding the truth this time, and refusing to settle for anything less. “S-Stanford… I-”

Before the pink Gem could even get another word out, the unthinkable happened. A sudden, ear-piercing alarm blared through the air, readily echoing throughout the trees with a seemingly unending shriek.

“Augh! What is that?!” Amethyst yelled over the deafening din.

“I think it’s the hyperdrive!” Pearl called, nodding over to Fiddleford’s backpack, where the device was still stowed. “The change in altitude while going down the mountain must have activated it!”

“H-how do we get it to stop?!” Fiddleford cried, ripping the bag off his back to peer in at the blaring, flashing device.

“We need to-” Garnet cut herself off with a gasp, her future vision catching an extremely important warning just in time. “Look out!” she shouted to Ford in particular. The author instantly spun around, clutching the journal close to his chest to see a massive clawed hand rushing right for him. The most Ford could really do was brace himself for a painful impact, though fortunately it never came as a certain pink Gem and her sturdy shimmering shield intercepted the devastating blow instead.

“T-the Gremloblin!” Ford exclaimed, stunned as he glanced past Rose, who still stood defensively between him and the now-rampaging creature. “It’s awake!”

“We need to get out of here!” the pink Gem urged, pressing hard against her shield try and ward the incredibly strong monster off.

“Can we turn that stupid wiperdrive off first?!” Amethyst asked with an irritated groan.

“We’re tryin to!” Fiddleford exclaimed as both him and Pearl desperately tampered with the screeching device to quiet it down. “D-darn thing won’t-”

Suddenly, the Gremloblin’s attention shifted away from Ford and Rose and to an entirely different direction instead: towards the inventor, or rather, the loudly whining device in his hands. Before any of the others could even react, the monster lashed out, swerving around the pair in front of it and reaching out to grab Fiddleford in its enormous, deadly claws in one single swipe. The hyperdrive fell out of his grasp and into Pearl’s, though the white Gem was quick to leap back, summoning her weapon alongside her teammates to face this fell beast.

“Fiddleford!” Ford exclaimed in apt alarm over the peril his friend was in. Peril that only seemed to grow as the Gremloblin’s grip on the terrified inventor tightened, its large golden eyes baring straight into his. Despite his initial thrashing and struggling, Fiddleford more or less went completely limp as his eyes took on the same blank pallor as the monster’s, a sign that he was helplessly lost to whatever sort of trance it had somehow put him under.

“Ford, hurry and take cover somewhere!” Rose ordered, brandishing her blade in preparation for the inevitable fight ahead. “We’ll take care of-”

The pink Gem cut herself off with a startled gasp as Ford suddenly rushed past her, armed only with his full canteen of water and the intent to do whatever he could to rescue Fiddleford from the Gremloblin’s clutches. “Wait!” Garnet warned, her future vision already showing the outcome of the author’s brazenness to her. “Don’t throw water at it! It’ll only-”

The fusion’s warning was largely unheard as Ford chucked his canteen forward with as much force as he could possibly muster. It struck the Gremloblin squarely on the head, completely dousing it all over. It was enough to monetarily startle the creature, but that surprise was immediately short-lived as it unleashed a massive, outraged roar of retaliation. As if in response to the water itself, the Gremloblin seemed to double, if not triple in size before their very eyes, growing spikes and tusks and even strong and sturdy wings. The unexpected transformation left the spectating group completely baffled, especially the author as he realized that his hastiness was essentially the direct cause of it.

“It’ll only get much harder to deal with,” Garnet finally finished bluntly.

“Now you tell me…” Ford huffed, disgruntled.

“Gems, let’s go!” Rose commanded swiftly, finally rallying her teammates into action against the monster. The Gremloblin kept its tight grip on Fiddleford as it let out another vicious growl, towering over all of the Gems as they raced for it with their respective weapons drawn. Hasty as always, Amethyst leapt for it first, swinging her whip loose and wildly to latch onto one of the monster’s mighty upper fangs. The purple Gem used her taunt weapon to launch herself upward, raring to land squarely on the creature’s face to inflict a heavy kick, but before she could, the Gremloblin turned her plan against her. Instead, it swung its head upwards hard, sending both Amethyst and her whip flying fast and far off into the forest, away from the fight altogether.

In light of the purple Gem’s easy defeat, Garnet and Pearl teamed up in their successive attack. The white Gem went high, gracefully jumping up towards the treetops to land on a sturdy perch above the creature while the fusion distracted it on the ground below. The Gremloblin showed no intentions of losing its prey, despite Garnet’s best attempts at reaching the inventor while dodging the monster’s violent swings all the while. The fusion’s strength was formidable, to be sure, but when pitted against a monster of such sheer size and ferocity as the Gremloblin, even Garnet herself was no match. All it took was for the creature to suddenly catch the fusion by her gauntlet before it flung her away, sending her plowing through the trees and knocking several over in her wake until she was completely out of sight. A mere moment later, the Gremloblin also caught sight of Pearl launching herself and her spear its way, though it easily managed to stop her as well by simply making eye contact with her alone. The white Gem let out a horrified gasp, her eyes reflecting the Gremloblin’s golden ones as she collapsed flat onto the ground, instantly curling up and wrapping her arms around herself as her breaths came out in short, shallow sobs.

“Pearl!” Rose cried, almost rushing to the white Gem’s side right then and there if not for the Gremloblin attempting to attack her next.

“What’s wrong?! What did it do to her and Fiddleford?” Ford demanded, noticing that the inventor was still completely petrified in the Gremloblin’s grasp.

“I’ve heard of this happening before,” Rose said tensely, her hold on her sword tightening. “Gremloblins can make anyone see their worst nightmares just by looking into their eyes. It’ll wear off eventually, but still, we need to get Fiddleford as far away from it as possible before it can get any worse!”

“Well, then, by all means, let’s-” the author stopped short as the Gremloblin let out yet another booming roar. And then, without any warning, it outstretched its mighty wings, lifting its hulking body off the ground with but a single flap. Rose and Ford only had time to rush forward in a thwarted attempt at rescuing the inventor before the Gremloblin took off in flight, taking Fiddleford right along with it as it began its descent down the nearby mountainside.  

“No!” Ford shouted, not hesitating to chase after the beast, desperate to stop it before it could make off with his friend forever. And yet, before he could really begin his panicked pursuit, a steady hand grabbed him by the arm and swiftly pulled him back instead.

“Stay here!” Rose ordered as she summoned a new shield on her arm.

“No, I’m going with you!” the author exclaimed, adamant.

“No, you’re not! Its bad enough that one of you is in danger, I’m not risking you both.”

“You won’t be ‘risking’ anything,” Ford huffed in thorough annoyance. “I can handle something like this, you know I can. So why do you insist on acting like I can’t?!”

“Because you’re only a human!” Rose snapped, and just like that, everything shifted into stark silence.

Ford stilled, his eyes widening as he looked to the pink Gem with apt disbelief. “O-only human?”

“S-Stanford…” Rose immediately began to retract, instantly regretting her words. “I didn’t mean it like that, I-I… I just-”

“Tell me, Rose,” Ford began, his tone hard and filled with resolve as he pressed his way past the pink Gem. “Do you think a supposedly ‘simple’ human would be willing to do something like this?”

Without warning, the author suddenly sprinted off, completely unarmed and ready to take the Gremloblin on unarmed. He didn’t even bother to glance over his shoulder to see if Rose was following him, largely since he didn’t care. Regardless of whether or not she wanted him to, he was going to save Fiddleford. He was going to prove to both her and to himself that even if he was ‘only’ human, he was so much more than that as well.

Fortunately, the Gremloblin hadn’t gotten too far away as it drifted down the craggy mountain’s face. It was a rather sharp descent, but one that Ford was willing to make for Fiddleford’s sake, tearing his coat and scraping himself bloody as he half-tripped, half-ran down it. For a moment, the author dared to hope that he actually had a chance at catching up to the monster, but just before he could reach it, it turned hard, changing its course so that it was flying away from the mountain instead of simply down it. Ford skidded to a sharp stop, though only for a moment, refusing to let this be the end of the chase. Instead, he acted on impulse and adrenaline, backing up briefly before running full stop towards the nearest ledge. The author was nothing if not a man of science, so all the while, he was rushing through a number of calculations in his head, determining just how far he’d have to jump and exactly what his odds of actually making it might be. The results on both accounts were daunting, but even so, they didn’t stop him from taking the leap all the same. With a courageous shout, Ford pushed himself off the mountainside, keeping the Gremloblin and Fiddleford both in his sights all the while as he sailed through the air towards them. For a brief moment, at least.

For soon enough, gravity inevitably enacted itself upon the author, stopping his forward momentum as he all too quickly began plummeting downward. The base of the mountain was hundreds of feet below him, and Ford didn’t even have to think twice to know the impact would be agonizing. But fortunately, it was an impact that never came as he landed softly in a pair of soft, outstretched arms instead.

The moment Rose caught him amidst his freefall, Ford’s heart practically sunk immeasurably. So much for trying to prove himself to her, for in his reckless hastiness, here she had come, once again, to rescue him from peril, just as she so often had to do. However, as she began to float gently back down towards the mountain, her expression was anything but admonishing; instead it was sad, remorseful as she averted the author’s gaze altogether and spoke softly as they touched down. “Only a human like you would be brave enough to risk his life for his friend,” the pink Gem shook her head and laughed as she looked down at him. “I can’t believe I didn’t realize it until now. Maybe you really can handle it after all…”

“R-Rose?”

“B-but now isn’t really the time for that, is it?” she asked, her tone turning upbeat and determined as she set her sights on the fleeing Gremloblin high above them. “Let’s do this, Stanford, together this time.”

As baffled as he was, the author couldn’t help but return the pink Gem’s smile as he noted her warm sincerity. Which was why he allowed her to take the literal leap high into the air with him in tow, easily gaining enough height and speed to catch up to the soaring Gremloblin. They landed squarely on its back, though the moment the monster sensed their weight, it went into a frenzy. Rose and Ford struggled to keep their footing as the creature tried everything it could to shake them off its back, from twirling to divebombing and everything in between. Even so, they kept their wits about them, Ford in particular as he managed to crawl forward towards the monster’s head. In trying to simply stay on the Gremloblin herself as she was, Rose was quite surprised when she glanced ahead, only to find the author perched on the monster’s back as he, oddly enough, drew his journal out of his lab coat of all things. And, in one swift move, he reeled the book back before slamming it hard into the back of the Gremloblin’s head.

Despite his strong, muscular, monstrous form, the creature recoiled in pain from the surprisingly heavy blow. Miraculously enough, it managed to knock the beast out cold entirely, though as a result, its wings immediately went limp. Ford only briefly let out a gasp of alarm as the monster’s unconscious form began careening madly through the air towards the ground far below, but once again, Rose raced to his rescue just in the nick of time.

Acting quickly, the pink Gem swept the author into her arms before doing the very same with the still quite listless Fiddleford. With both humans safe and secure in her grasp, Rose leapt from the plummeting beast’s back, floating slowly down towards the ground as the Gremloblin fell at a much faster rate. The pink Gem and the author watched with wide eyes as the now-defeated beast crashed into the roof of a barn out in the countryside, one that they landed not too far away from themselves.

“Well…” Ford mused as Rose released both him and Fiddleford, carefully setting the inventor down in the grass so he could recover. “I have to say that was a bit sloppy… but still successful all the same.”

“Sloppy?” Rose asked with an incredulous chuckle. “Ford, that was amazing! Still, I can’t help but feel bad for that poor Gremloblin. After all, it was just trying to rest peacefully…”

“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” the author assured. “After all, I hear those things are… frustratingly hearty.” As if to prove him right, a familiar growl began to sound from inside the barn, accompanied by a chorus of panicked horses, cows, and various other livestock. “A-actually, we should probably get going before we have to go through this all over again…”

Rose didn’t argue, gently scooping Fiddleford up once again as they hurried out of the monster’s range. Their next goal, to regroup with the rest of the scattered Gems, recover the hyperdrive and finally get home from this lengthy quest, was clear, and that’s exactly what the pair set out to do. Along the way, Fiddleford finally began to slip out of his stupor, though as soon as he did, it was immediately apparent that not all was well with the inventor in the aftermath of his horrific encounter with the fearsome Gremloblin. For much of the trek back up the mountain, Fiddleford was all but incoherent, babbling frantically to himself as Rose carried him to spare his still-unsteady legs from having to walk. Even after a round of precautionary healing tears from the pink Gem herself, the inventor’s shaken manner hardly changed. He was still quite distant and anxious (even more anxious than he usually had a tendency to be), traits that Pearl also shared when the trio found her and the hyperdrive still sitting in the same exact spot in the woods where they had left her. Rose and Ford chalked their worrisome behavior up to the Gremloblin’s nightmarish gaze, and carried the hope that they’d recover from it soon enough, something that Garnet was able to confirm when they met up with her and Amethyst once more. Yet all the same, despite Fiddleford’s tense, fretful silence, Ford still happened to glean one quiet, bitterly muttered thought from his friend as they all parted ways upon making it home that evening. Something about finding a way to forget that it had all ever happened in the first place.

***

In light of the harrowing adventure they had just returned from, Ford was very grateful to find a moment’s rest to catch up on recording his notes on it in the journal. The author had taken to his favorite writing spot, on a surprisingly comfy stone halfway up the hill to the Gem’s temple, one that gave him a quiet, serene spot to jot down his thoughts and observations. He had just about finished documenting his and Rose’s surprisingly swift victory against the Gremloblin, when the pink Gem herself decided to join him.

At first, Rose said nothing as she took a seat on the rock beside him, her pink curls shifting softly in the late evening breeze. And aside from a brief glance her way, Ford simply continued writing, unsure of what to really say to her in light of all that had happened. Fortunately though, he didn’t have to think of anything, as Rose spoke up first instead.

“You know, it’s so funny,” she began with a small laugh that almost sounded bitter in a way. “I’ve spent so long trying to not to be like them, but even after thousands of years, I guess I still have a few things in common with them after all.”

“...With... who?” Ford ventured, slightly worried that, once again, he wouldn’t get a concrete answer. However, much to his surprise, a concrete answer was exactly what Rose finally gave him.

“With... with Homeworld,” the pink Gem sighed, turning her gaze up to the early stars above. “They used to keep things from me—f-from... lesser Gems too. Said we ‘didn’t need to know’ what they did. I always thought it was so unfair. So... in a way, I suppose I understand how you feel whenever I do the same thing to you.”

“...Oh,” was all Ford said, wisely choosing not to press Rose with any further questions on the matter. After all, his own brashness and stubborn craving for answers the pink Gem hadn’t been ready to give had already created something of a rift between them. A rift that the author had no intentions of widening any more than he already had.

“Homeworld... wasn’t exactly a place where Gems could just... be whatever or whoever they wanted to be...” Rose explained slowly, carefully. “There was no freedom, no fun... no love. That’s why, when I first came here and found out that this planet was filled with those things, I knew from the start that the Earth, that freedom, and fun, and love, were all well worth protecting. But they—H-Homeworld, didn’t see things the same way. They wanted to use the Earth to make more of us, to turn it into another one of their countless colonies. If they had their way, it... it would have destroyed the Earth and every single living thing that calls it home. A-and I just couldn’t stand by and let that happen! Which was why I decided to take a stand against them, me and all of the other Gems who felt the same way about the Earth. We came together and fought against Homeworld with everything we had. Like I said before, we left Homeworld behind entirely, all so we could finally exist somewhere else. So we could all be something else...”

“The Crystal Gems...?” Ford inferred, trying his best to hide the initial shock from such a heavy revelation.

Rose nodded thoughtfully. “Back then there were more than just four of us. But... well, what happened to the others is... a very long story in and of itself.”

“i see...” the author’s brow furrowed as he took stock of the pink Gem’s expression, noting the hints of longstanding pain and guilt within it. “I always thought that the four of you had arrived on Earth as part of some exploratory mission and just decided to stay here after all the others left. But now... knowing the truth... I... I suppose I never could have imagined something like, well, that.”

“It’s... not something I like thinking back on...” Rose said, looking down fretfully.

“That’s... understandable,” Ford nodded, suddenly quite remorseful. “Rose, I... I’m sorry. I didn’t know. I just... Well, you know how stubborn I can be when it comes to my research.”

“I wouldn’t call it ‘stubborn’,” the pink Gem finally smirked. “I’d call it... ‘determined’. And that determination was something you definitely put to the test earlier today. Which is why I’m so, so sorry for doubting you before. I thought I was just trying to protect you, but you were right all along; you really can handle more than I gave you credit for.”

“Don’t feel too bad about it,” Ford remarked with a small, joking grin. “You wouldn’t be the first to underestimate me, after all.”

Noting the author’s playful manner, Rose was unable to hold back a hearty laugh over this, one that Ford was more than happy to share. Despite the danger they faced earlier in the day, neither of them could deny that the struggles and trials of it all had indeed given way to a newfound sense of trust between them. The author already had an abundance of respect for the pink Gem, perhaps from even the very first day he had met her two years ago. But that respect had indeed been tested to the limits when she had so openly refused to see him as her equal. It was only when Rose herself decided to take on the same sort of respect Ford had for her towards him that the pair, all differences aside, were finally able to truly see eye-to-eye. And, as they’d both come to find out, that respect would be tried and tested time and time again, wavered and torn through portals, and demons, and a tragic separation. Yet even through it all, that respect, though constantly in flux between growing and shrinking, surprisingly was never once broken.

***

“So that’s it?” Peridot cut in the moment it was apparently that Ford, McGucket, and the other Gems had wrapped up their story. “You just went out to that ‘Crash Site Omega’, went in, got your hyperdrive (which is incredibly outdated tech, by the way, I can't believe you managed to find any sort of use for it!), fought a monster, and then went home? How boring!”

“Aw, shucks, it sure wasn’t borin’ at the time!” McGucket exclaimed. “’Specially not that nasty Grem-whosa-whats-it. I can guarantee firsthand that thing was a horrifyin’ freak of nature!”

“So can we, since we fought it off one time too!” Mabel chimed in with a daring grin.

“Excuse me, you what?” Ford asked, instantly concerned upon hearing this.

“Eh, we can tell you about that some other time,” Dipper quickly brushed it off. “For now, I kinda can’t help but think that your story sounds... kinda familiar.”

“Oh yeah!” Steven agreed, turning to the Gems. “Mom being all secretive about Homeworld is basically you guys used to do to us. That… honestly explains a lot, actually…”

“We had our reasons,” Garnet said simply. “So did Rose.”

“And at least we did open up to you all about it… eventually,” Pearl added.

“Yeah, and it didn’t take a hundred million annoying questions to get us to do it either,” Amethyst said, taking an obvious jab at Ford.

“W-well, what can I say?” the author huffed defensively. “I’ll be the first to admit that I was much more… impetuous when I was younger-”

“Impetuous?” McGucket repeated with a laugh. “Stanford, don’t go lyin’ to these youngsters. You were as stubborn as stubborn comes!”

“Not stubborn,” Garnet spoke up, offering the author a small smile. “Determined, just like Rose said.”

“Exactly,” Ford grinned, satisfied. “Determined. Much like you kids are, come to think of it.”

“Determined enough to… oh, I don’t know…” Dipper began rather leadingly. “Tell us what and where Crash Site Omega actually is?”

“Nice try,” the author said knowingly. “But no. Well… at least not yet, anyway.”

“A ‘not yet’, huh?” Mabel looked to Steven and Dipper with an encouraging grin. “Well, that’s not a total no, so its good enough for me!”

“Not for me,” Peridot remarked, crossing her arms and shaking her head. “I’m still not over the fact that you used a Temporal Displacement Hyperdrive, of all things! What kind of relic of a machine were you even trying to build that would need a power source that’s so… so ancient?”

Ford, McGucket, and the Gems exchanged a bit of a worried glance at this, knowing that the true answer to this question held countless missteps and horrors all their own. Yet even if the portal itself had ended in disaster, none of them could deny that the road to get them to its completion had been filled with countless ups and downs and unique stories to tell. It had been a path paved with memories, many of them quite fond, memories that they were all mutually glad to finally have back, even if restoring them had awakened moments they would have just as well left back in the past. But if there was any one thing they could all agree on, it was that they were still glad to have those memories, those adventurous, daring days of discovery and friendship back, tying them together into the team they used to be once more. Which was why it was with a small smile that Ford replied to the green Gem’s question, silently agreeing with the others to leave the pains of the past behind to embrace the best of the present, and the road to the future, instead. “None of us need to worry about that anymore. After all, there are some stories that are better left… untold.”

Next:

[kamino-ink]

A Mess of Stress | Seo Changbin

✧ Genre: Soulmate!au, really cute you gUYS, minor angst

✧ Summary: Changbin has always been your best friend; he’s there to comfort you when you’re upset, to hold you close when you’re scared, and hug you tightly when you’re happy - but, he’s constantly pushing away his own problems in doing so. You’re determined to help him open up.

✧ Word Count: 2.8k

✧ Want to read other parts of this series? Check out my masterlist!

                                         ✧

 Having an emotion based connection to your soulmate was positively exhausting, to say the least. You could sense their emotions and they could sense yours; there wasn’t a real way to identify who that other half of you was, physically. All you could hope for was the very, very slim chance that somehow you would be around said soulmate during a period of intense emotional pressure, such as overwhelming happiness after spotting an absolutely adorable dog across the street, or even waves of fear while watching a spectacular horror film.

 In terms of your soulmate and how they felt bearing your emotions, you more or less felt really bad for the poor sap. You were prone to having some intense mood swings, mostly because you were rather sensitive to the world around you. When you watched dramas, you usually went from a warm ball of joy to a feeling of so much sadness that, if it was possible, your ears would droop downwards like an upset puppy. Or, for another example, you would be skipping down the sidewalk alongside your group of friends when you spot some ignorant asshole carelessly throwing a bundle of trash onto the grass - which would have you bubbling over in anger that was often expressed by you grabbing the trash and tossing it into the nearest bin since someone clearly couldn't do it on their own.

 “Holy shit, I am going to implode before I get this study guide done!” You whined loudly in the midst of your bedroom, your grip on your pen tightening while you rested your cheek onto the stack of papers on top of your desk.

 “And why is that, Y/N?”

 “Because my soulmate is always feeling so fucking stressed out, and since I’m stressed out already it really isn’t helping.”

 “Ah, I got you.” The man sprawled out on your comforter hummed after your exasperated explanation, meeting your dead gaze with a quirked eyebrow. “So are you like, pissed at them or what?”

 You huff quietly, lifting your head again just to bury your cold cheeks into the palms of your hands while you propped your elbows onto the desk. “No, I mean I get it, you know? But it worries me how often they’re so stressed out, Binnie.” Another sigh escapes your lips. “I’m worried about their home life or whatever, you know? What if they’re stuck in a shitty family situation and I can’t help them? Or - what if they’re all alone studying their ass off for some huge exam? Oh god, what if they’re like the CEO of a company and that’s why they’re so stress-”

 “Calm down, Gyu. I doubt they’re so important that they’re the CEO of some high and mighty company,” Changbin murmured, sitting up on your bed to hold his arms out encouragingly, watching as you let out another disgruntled noise and walk over to your bed, flopping down onto the messy blankets and sheets right into his arms, “everyone gets stressed out, you’ll just have to deal with it for a while.”

 “I still don’t understand why you gave me the same nickname as your stuffed Munchlax.”

 “Is that seriously the only thing you got out of what I just said?”

 “No, Binnie - I just... whoever my soulmate is, they’re really important to me. I just want them to relax and be happy, wherever they are in the world.” You admit softly, nearly letting out a purr as the man starts to slowly run his fingers through your hair, his other hand coming to rest underneath your head and readjust it so your head was resting peacefully on his lap.

 “Mhm. Well, I’m sure that the lucky bastard is happy as can be, even if you can’t feel it over their stress.” He reassured you calmly, smiling to himself as you visibly start to relax under his touch and curl up even closer to him.

 “H-hey, don’t call my soulmate a bastard, asshole.”

 “Alright, whatever you say, Gyu.”

 You really wanted to know what Changbin’s soulmate bond was. The secretive man had yet to even speak a word of it for however many years the two of you had been friends, and it seemed as if none of your other mutual friends could exactly pinpoint what his connection was either. Both you and Felix, arguably the two closest people in the world with Changbin himself, were dead set on figuring it out.

 Felix had met his soulmate a couple of weeks ago, and now the only people left in your close-knit trio to find their respective soulmates were, of course, you and Changbin. Though, as time went by, you found yourself feeling like you’d be alone forever. A connection through just emotion wasn’t enough to go off of, especially compared to a bond similar to say, Felix and his soulmate; they could essentially “see” through the other person’s eyes if they concentrated hard enough, which was how Felix was able to hunt them down after so long.

 The cherry on top was the fact that your soulmate was still overwhelmed with crushing stress. While it was clear that they were at least trying to compensate for the distress that weaved its way into your head, it wasn’t enough - you were starting to crumble under emotions that didn’t even belong to you. On occasion, your other half would have snippets of joy or warmth that flooded your senses, but they would rarely last more than maybe two minutes before the stress started to eat at their brain - and yours, too.

 But that was one of the least of your concerns at the moment, because for now, you were trying to distract yourself by prying into Changbin’s head.

 “Binnie, why can't any of us know what your connection is?” The question is innocent enough in all honesty, your lips curled into a soft pout of confusion as you utter the words to the man you called your best friend sat next to you in the middle of class.

 Music theory was interesting, but it wasn’t really your top choice in electives for the new semester; but then the black haired man had sent you a defeated frown when he noticed you didn't share any classes with each other. So, naturally, as one does, you sacrificed a random elective in creative writing so you could be with him for some portion of the school day.

 Changbin spared you a quick glance before turning back to his notes, scribbling messily on his notebook and occasionally going to jot something down in the little notepad he carried with him everywhere. “I just, don’t care about the idea of having my friends potentially invading my privacy and my soulmate’s, okay?” He utters gruffly, but it isn't enough to satisfy you.

 While you definitely weren't looking to agitate him or push his buttons, you still had so many questions.

 “Alright, that’s understandable - but can I at least get a hint?”

 “No.”

 “Do you know if they're a boy or a girl? I bet that they’re awesome either way, maybe we could all be friends!”

 “Uh huh...”

 “Oh, I wonder if they live close by - wouldn’t it be cool to take a trip somewhere new, just to meet them in person-”

 “Can you shut the fuck up, please?” Changbin finally snapped, albeit not causing a scene in the middle of the lecture - his voice came out sharp and gruff, still enough to startle you. “Stop trying to get me to open up, it’s annoying as fuck Y/N.”

 “I-” You stutter on your next choice words, feeling your cheeks heat up in embarrassment because somehow, you had managed to piss of your best friend. “I’m sorry, Changbin.”

 “Yeah, whatever. Apology accepted, Gyu.” He mutters, not even looking at you as he goes to write something else in his hidden notepad.

 Usually the nickname would make you feel warm and bubbly, but all you could think of was how you had pushed your friend too far. So you nodded silently before turning back to your side of the shared desk, letting your hair move to the side of your face so that he couldn't see the flush of your cheeks, or the guilt ridden flash in your eyes.

 You felt like shit, and you were positive that your soulmate felt the same way - or not, who knows, since the person was as stressed as ever, even more so than before if that was even possible.

 Your emotions were an unhealthy mix of guilt, stress, and sadness; ever since you had caused the patient Changbin to snap at you in the middle of Music Theory last week, you’d tried to keep your talking to him at a minimum; at least in terms of soulmates. Not a word of your struggles regarding keeping up with your soulmate’s drowning emotions seeped out between your lips the entire week, and you had completely stopped asking Changbin about his bond.

 “Ugh, I hate this!” You groaned into your pillow, holding the fluffy material against your face for a few more moments before tossing it aside onto the bed, a soft sigh echoing in your otherwise silent bedroom.

 Tomorrow was the day of the campus dance - it usually went on in the start of October, since most of the student body wouldn’t be at the school during the small break they got between Halloween and the first days of November. You’d been hoping for Changbin to bring it up at some point, but he’d simply brushed it off whenever it was mentioned. With another inevitable sigh, you lean over and grab your phone from your nightstand, bringing it up to your face and flinching at the initial flash of brightness from unlocking it.

 ‘Are you going to the dance tomorrow, Binnie?’

 Almost immediately you got a response, though it wasn’t the one you wanted.

 ‘No way, I’m swamped with work and shit the next couple of days. You’re not going, are you?’

 You’re contemplating on replying because you really, really wanted to go to the dance; tons of high schoolers tended to be let in since they were friends or relatives with the upperclassmen, albeit mostly college freshman, and you already knew that Felix and his friends would be going. It was rare for all of you to actually get together and goof around as a group, so you figured it was reasonable enough why you wanted to go.

 A notification pops up on the top of your screen, and you barely catch the contact name before it disappears.

 Why was Woojin texting you so late at night?

 ‘Hey kiddo, this is super sudden and probably late notice, but I was wondering if you wanted to go to the dance with me tomorrow? We haven’t gotten to talk in a hot minute since we’ve both been busy :D’

 ‘Actually I was just in the middle of debating on whether to go alone or not - let’s do it!’

 ‘Oh shit I didn't actually think you'd be going alone, but hey I guess that’s more us time then! Can I pick you up at eight? We can get dinner before or after if you want~’

 ‘By dinner you mean two buckets of KFC, honeybear, let’s be real with ourselves lmao. Eight is cool, and I’m down to eat whenever you want!’

 ‘That’s perfect, I’ll see you tomorrow then!! Get some sleep too, I know you still have an early class tomorrow’

 ‘Shut it, old man’

 You let out a chuckle as you reply to the older student, quickly going back to message Changbin about your plans for tomorrow night.

 ‘Good news~ Woojinnie asked me if I could go with him to the dance!! If you have a chance, you should drop by so all of us can hang out’ [read, 11:57 pm]

 “So, why couldn't Changbin come out tonight?” Chan asks you curiously, taking another swig of his beer that Minho had snuck into the dance, much to Woojin’s annoyance.

 You nibble on your bottom lip, readjusting the jacket Woojin had lent you a while ago since you'd gotten a bit chilly, just wearing a flattering top and pants. “He said that he’s being swamped with homework, but just the other day he told me he was free to go tonight.” You end up admitting to the three men, making Minho cock and eyebrow in burning curiosity.

 “I mean, I heard some of the other music teachers were assholes and assigned some papers the other day. That’s why my date couldn't come tonight, poor thing.” He hummed with a shrug.

 “You would've ditched the poor girl just so you could take shots out here, Minho.” You deadpan, giggling as he pouts and glares at Chan and Woojin who silently nod in agreement.

 “Hey, it looks like it’s about to rain,” Woojin murmurs nonchalantly, looking up to the darkening sky now riddled with icky gray rainclouds, with a sudden boom of thunder being more than enough to convince you all that his prediction was right, “lets head to the car, yeah? We can go get some food and head back to my place for the night since you idiots came here alone and drank without a designated driver.” The elder man scolded the other two playfully, smacking the backs of their heads as he started to head to the parking lot.

 “I’ll text Felix real quick and tell them to meet up with us at your house in a few.” You tell the trio as they start to walk to the car quickly, all of you feeling the first few droplets of rain.

 Since the sprinkles of rain didn’t exactly bother you, you take out your phone and send the message to the younger boy, only when you go to stuff it in your pocket the rain has turned into a full on downpour - soaking you within seconds.

 You try, and fail, to cover your exposed top half with your arms to act like a shield. It was not your week, clearly.

 Suddenly though, the rain has stopped pelting down onto your body. You look over, only to widen your eyes in shock.

 “I knew you wouldn’t look at the weather, Y/N,” Changbin mumbles softly, reaching out a hand to latch onto one of your arms and pull you closer to him under his umbrella, “not bringing an umbrella or a raincoat for you? Tsk, I guess Woojin couldn't be bothered to check the forecast either, then.”

 “W-what... what are you even doing here, Binnie?” You question him in surprise, glad that the darkness of the night and the bellowing storm was enough to hide your pink cheeks.

 The man stayed silent for a second, only to subconsciously tug you even closer to his body, leaving you quite literally pressed against his chest. “I felt like shit for ditching you. I didn't have any schoolwork, I was focused on something else entirely and was so fucking stressed about it-” he broke off to clear his throat and raise his voice so that you could hear him over the growing storm, “I also wanted to apologize for causing you so much stress over the past couple of weeks, er, months.”

 No way.

 “I - Changbin, that doesn’t make sense,” you breathed out airily, your eyebrows furrowed in confusion and wonder, “you don’t make me feel stressed, ever. It’s my soulmate who - oh my god.”

 “Took you a second, huh?” He chuckled, leaning down just enough so his forehead was gently pressed against yours.

 “But how - how did you know? Why wouldn't you tell me, Binnie?” You ask him quickly, your words a rush as you start to ramble in a state of astonishment.

 “Whenever you get excited over the stupidest things, like finding extra change in your pocket or seeing a dog across the street, I feel your happiness. When you sob like a damn baby over those shitty dramas, I feel your sadness and agitation. I’ve always been able to easily feel every emotion you’ve ever felt.” He explains, slowly inching closer and closer down your temple so that the tips of your cold noses were pressed against one another. “I didn't say anything for so long because I didn't think either of us were ready. I mean, we were still kids just a year ago, technically,”

 “I didn't want to move too fast... but then the younger kids started meeting their soulmates, and they’re all happy and content. So... here I am?” He breathes out, his soft, warm breaths fanning out onto your parted lips, now just an inch or two away.

 Without wasting another moment thinking everything over, you cup the man’s cheeks in your hands and bring him down just enough so you can kiss him, tasting his sweet lips with a slow, caring pace. He nearly drops the umbrella in surprise, but catches it and manages to keep it over your heads as he slowly kisses you back, still using his other hand to hold you to his chest.

 You both pull away at the same time, blushing furiously on both ends.

 “... we’re about to go grab some KFC and crash at Woojin’s, you wanna come with?”

 “Of course I do, Gyu.”

                                         ✧

[toasttz]

From the Tabletop #9

Welcome back. Let's talk about Exalted again! Last time, our new team had assembled and-- oh, right, I totally forgot we had a fifth Exalt. We have Zatch. Zatch is basically if you fused Albin and Rakis, I guess? But due to a change in work schedule, he's barely gotten to play with us. So, maybe we'll get to talk more about him later. He's Volkenstein's successor character, and it seems like his player has a good beat on him. Just real-life issues is all. Right, so, we were in need of some traveling funds, so we took on a job that was perfect for us - hunting a wild beast! No moral ambiguity or broken kneecaps required! So, we set out into the fields to find this dinosaur-like monster we needed to take down. En route, we discuss if there were any last-minute actions or supplies required. Doran: I could use a drink, frankly. Albin (OoC): I roll introduce fact. There are, in fact, large lizard creatures who naturally produce a form of booze in their stomach from the fermented fruit they eat. GM: Yeah. Okay. They're called Keggers. They are barrel-chested lizard creatures. You eat one, you're definitely getting drink. Doran: Glorious. Proceed the circle of three Solars and a Lunar all repeatedly failing their perception checks. GM: Guys, I think you're hunting an Indominus Rex, since its stealth rolls... well, let's just say you guys shouldn't be having this hard of a time of it. Suddenly, a big-ass dinosaur was upon us and we scattered around to combat it. Each of us defaulted to our usual combat tactics: Rakis mounted Wormsworth, Doran readied his sword, Albin prepped his Prayer Piece rifle, and Kharas... immediately mounted it. This created a little, brief, inter-party tension as Albin readied his flame-thrower rifle at the dinosaur. Kharas: Hey, wait a sec! You might hit me! Albin: I never miss. Kharas: I'M STILL UP HERE! GM: Roll attack. Albin: *Rolls freakishly well.* GM: Congrats, you don't hit Kharas. Kharas: You singed off my eyebrows! GM: You're in warform. You don't currently have those. Kharas: ... IF I DID, YOU'D HAVE BURNED MY EYEBROWS OFF! Ultimately, with a little coordination, the dino went down. We then proceeded to carve it up for its hide, meat, and a couple of us even took trophies. We even made "metric craptons" of dino-jerky, which we sold for a tidy profit, insofar as we couldn't bring it all back ALA Oregon Trail. But the dino hunt went well all-in-all. Afterwards, we realized we need to head towards Great Forks, but then had to find a way to cross a river. The ferry was our best bet, but money had gotten tight and we had to have a way to bring Wormsworth. Kharas attempted a rather clever gambit of disguising himself as a noble and forcing the issue, but the captain of the vessel was stern. Ultimately, we agreed to pay a price once we had arrived, which settled things, as Albin had done business previously with one Master of the Eternal Golden Paradise - a young philanthropist and patron of the arts and sciences. And Kharas, using Twin-Faced Hero, managed to "persuade" Master to paying their way, if you get my drift. Later, Kharas would use this as leverage against Albin, demanding a cool leather jacket. Albin and Doran worked together to make a badass leather coat for him, under the proviso it would have enough belts, pouches, and zippers to qualify him for a modern-day Squeenix character. Kharas happily agreed. Arrival at Great Forks more or less went off without a hitch (barring a gang of roving youths who attempted to sell Albin and Doran cutlery. I legit have no idea what to say on that and thus, will just move on). We even got to meet Teddy, one of the Giakell triplets (of which Albin is one member). Teddy is a huge, mountain of a man, quick to laugh, but became concerned when Albin mentioned that what they were doing was effectively hunting down serial killers. Teddy advised Albin to be careful in this pursuit, and Kharas, Rakis, and Doran played with the many, many nephews and nieces Albin had been blessed with due to his brother's undying love of his wife. Eventually, a lead with the guild took the circle down to the docks - whereupon I missed a good part of the conversation due to going to make popcorn and grab a soda. I return to hear Rakis explaining, at great length, how plan to BURN DOWN THE ENTIRE DOCK so we could investigate a ship belonging to a rich, now MIA, man who may well be tied to the mob of killers we've been after this whole time. Albin quickly shoots this plan down, insisting that there's no need to set fire to his hometown for something as straight-forward as this. Eventually, we also realize we could just have Kharas transform into a crane and inspect the ship anyway, as he did when he investigated the man's house as a cat. Let it be said - Rakis doesn't do things by halves. Eventually, clues began taking us north, so we bid farewell to Albin's hometown in order to cross the Yellow River. Albin then explains that there's an underground road they could use, leading to a trading town, partway across - called Yellow Shower - because I was really abusing "Introduce Fact" rolls this game and I am, in fact, 13 years old at heart. There, we even got to meet Albin's sister, Simone, who married a nobleman of the town, and we got to bum a free meal off them before we departed. We did fart around in Yellow Shower a while, but honestly, not much came of it. I also introduced facts about a local booze, Sewer Brue, a potent concoction sure to put you on the toilet for some time after drinking it, and that Yellow Shower was plagued by platypi, native to the region. Kharas took the chance to hunt one, in order to add it to his heart's blood. The platypus, not the drink. On the other side, however, all sorts of Hell broke loose, as Kharas, once more, became a bird and attempted to survey the above-ground scene, just in time to be fired upon by local hunters. He zipped back to the ground and transformed into a platypus in order to hide. Kharas: *SCARED PLATYPUS NOISES* We then asked the hunters for some advice as to where to go next, which ultimately sent us in the direction of a cave, which we spent... entirely too long standing outside of, debating if this was some "Cave of Wonders" shit and would slam down and kill us all if we ventured in. But ultimately, we headed in, and were immediately beset upon by a lesser fairy, who Albin and Rakis straight up merc'd without much hesitation. Afterward, we ventured further down, whereupon we found a cleft in the rock. And this happened: Doran: I guess I'll have a look and see what's down there. I have a merit where I naturally resist hot environments. GM: Yes, but if it's magma, you'll still suffer environmental damage. ... Hey, wait, didn't you write that Doran will die in boiling magma last time? Albin: Oh, crap. Doran: ... Okay, I'm going to have a look, but you're going to hold onto me and at the first sign of trouble, you're going to pull me back from it. Albin: Can do. Thankfully, Doran did NOT die in boiling magma and I was forced to sign a blood oath that I would not erroneously clickbait again. However, legit clickbaiting is A-OK! Moving on, eventually, we found a ways down, deeper into the cave. Rakis and Kharas both had ways of getting down, but the less-athletics-based Doran and Albin did not. And they also met a spirit flame serpent thing that apparently brews really good tea. Rakis then returned to try to help the others down, leaping up and easily getting Albin down safely. However, his return trip was a little less successful, as he ultimately dropped Doran on his face. On the upside, I finally got to roll those medicine dots I've had since I started this campaign. So there's that. Afterwards, we moved further in and found a colossal forge and its guardian - a four-armed giant creature who was quite talkative, but spoke in riddles. Doran and Albin questioned him for a while, and deduced he was no threat. He also helpfully proposed that Moonsilver could be used to bind the cursed aspects of Doran's artifact blade. We also disposed of the cursed Soulsteel garrot wire with help from the giant and his forge to completely destroy it. Doran: Well, I guess that's one cursed artifact down now. After tiring of bothering the giant (who was definitely talking about the Alchemicals and Autochthon, but I only knew that in the meta-sense and, thus, couldn't act on it in-character), we opted to try the last doorway available to us. Whereupon, all four of our circlemates throw lousy strength rolls, barely budging the door. Rakis then summoned Wormsworth, who easily threw the doors open on our behalf. Albin: I think it says something when a circle of Exalts failed to budge the door, but Wormsworth just did it no sweat. Kharas: Shut up. So, we went down into the mines whereupon we realized, Sol dammit, we HAD Moonsilver the entire time - the hammer Albin bought for Rakis back in session 2 was a Moonsilver weapon! So, we decide to do what you should never do in a party and split the party. Albin and Doran returned with the hammer to the giant's forge to ask for his assistance while Rakis and Kharas moved deeper into the mines in order to find what was down there. Albin and Doran use a crap-ton of craft charms and bond over their mutual tasks together over the last few sessions (moving each other up from Minor to Major intimacies as close friends), while Kharas and Rakis get ambushed by brigands deep in the mine and they proceed to kill the shit out of a lot of dudes. Kharas, at the end of the battle, began interrogating one of their number and the following happens. Kharas: Alright, you told me what I need to know. Get out of my sight. Random Baddie: *Gets up, flees* Rakis: By the way, Wormsworth just burrows out of the ground and eats the fleeing guy. Kharas: DUDE! I was actually going to let him live! Rakis: *SHRUG*. So, don't mess with Rakis, I suppose is the lesson here. Join me next time for D&D, because I currently have no more Exalted to talk about for a while! We're all caught up. Next time, in D&D: we meet dwarves! We meet demon cultists! We kill kobolds! See you there!

[duhragonball]

Continuity

I’m still reading Star Wars comics from the original Marvel run of 1977-1986.   Last night, I made it to the Return of the Jedi adaptation, so now I’ve read all the issues set between that movie and Empire Strikes Back.   As I expected, these comics (#45-80) feel a lot more like authentic Star Wars stories than the pre-ESB issues (#7-38).   The biggest plot hole that I noticed was that Luke still has his lightsaber throughout this period, despite losing it on Bepsin. 

It occurred to me later that this wasn’t necessarily a mistake.   There’s a deleted scene from ROTJ which shows Luke assembling his new lightsaber right before the mission to save Han Solo from Jabba the Hut.   This strongly implies that Luke didn’t have a lightsaber of his own between Episodes V and VI.   This was further supported by the ROTJ radio drama, produced in 1996, which incorporates the deleted scene into the story.   There, Luke expresses frustration with how difficult it is to build a lightsaber, and then he finally realizes that he should have been using the Force to assemble the pieces.   I haven’t read the novelization of the movie, but maybe it was touched on there as well. 

  Later sources indicated that building your own lightsaber is the final ritual for completing your Jedi training.   This is shown in the 2002 Clone Wars cartoon, where Barriss Offee assembles her own saber on Ilum, under the supervision of Luminara Unduli.  I’m pretty sure this scene was inspired by Darth Vader’s line in ROTJ, when he observed that Luke’s training is complete after checking out his badass green lightsaber.   The implication is that building your own lightsaber is difficult enough that Luke would have to be a Jedi Knight just to pull it off.

But in the early 80′s, none of that lore existed, and it would be a simple matter for writers to assume that Luke had no trouble at all getting a spare.  What I find strange is that no one bothered to explain where this spare lightsaber came from.    It’s like the writers just assumed he never lost the first one, but that’s crazy.

Really, the artists on the original Star Wars comics never seemed to be able to keep track of the lightsabers to begin with.    In the early comics, they paid no heed to the color schemes or hilt designs at all.    Not that I would expect late 70′s artists to really worry about props from a movie that had just come out, but they kept coloring all the lightsaber blades at random, and drawing the hilts way too short and thick.  Luke and Vader looked like they were holding soda cans.   The art started to get more true to the movies when Tom Palmer got involved, but one thing I started to notice was how the artists would draw Luke and Vader’s lightsabers on their belts, even when they were holding them, ignited, in their hands.   It was like the artists recognized the lightsaber hilts as part of the characters’ costumes, but they didn’t understand what they were.    I can’t really blame them for this, since the big column of light was what really drew everyone’s attention in the theaters, and it wasn’t like they could look up hilt schematics on Wookieepedia like you can now.  

Anyway, it struck me as kind of interesting how something minor like that can start off as an oversight, and then be easily corrected, or magnified into a major plot hole.    It’d be pretty simple to explain Luke’s between-movie lightsaber. 

Obi-Wan Kenobi had a spare tucked away somewhere, and Luke had been keeping it in storage just in case something like this happened.

Yoda had a spare, and Luke took it with him when he went to Bespin, and put it inside R2-D2′s lightsaber compartment for safe keeping.

Luke found a new lightsaber on a mission.

Luke built a new lightsaber to replace his old one, then lost that guy, requiring him to build the green one in ROTJ.

Luke found/constructed a replacement weapon, but it’s actually a knockoff “laser sword” and it doesn’t work as well as a genuine Jedi design, but it got the job done until he could do the job right.

I find it curious that no one ever bothered to tell any of those stories, though.   The Expanded Universe era of Star Wars multimedia seemed determined to sew up as many continuity problems as possible.   Some writer in the 2000′s did a story to establish that Jedi would swap lightsabers as a gesture of mutual respect, just to explain why Mace Windu’s action figure has a different lightsaber design than the one he has in the movies.   I’m not too worried about this stuff, and I don’t think Jo Duffy or David Michelinie were too worried about this stuff when they wrote Luke carving up Stormtroopers in Star Wars #45-80, but between 1994 and 2008, there were people working for Lucasfilm who were paid to worry about this stuff.   I’m genuinely surprised that no one ever got around to penning Star Wars: Luke’s Spare Lightsaber: The Lobot Chronicles: Dark Tidings.

It’s the little things like this that get lost in the shuffle, I’ve found.   When you read a Star Wars novel or comic book, the major characters are always very consistently portrayed, and the story always sticks very closely to the groundwork laid down in whatever movies were around at the time.   Star Wars #45-80 excelled at this.   Every issue was either about the good guys searching for Han Solo, or dealing with a crisis big enough to pull them away from the search for Han Solo.   I was disappointed that they didn’t spend much time at all having Luke work on his Jedi training, or trying to make sense of Darth Vader being his father, but I think Marvel knew the next movie would address that, so they knew not to wade too deep into that stream.  

The stuff that gets changed the most is the minor characters.   I read one issue where they basically established that Wedge Antilles never made it off the base on Hoth in ESB.   He and “Nice Shot” Jansen had to take cover in the AT-AT Luke blew up, and then they lived in what was left of the base while they waited for the imperials to clear out.   He was stranded there for months, and it was a pretty cool story, but I’m betting that later Star Wars writers decided to ignore this, because they wanted to use Wedge in other stories during that period.  

General Tagge’s another interesting example.   He was the guy on the Death Star in Episode IV, the one who warned that the Death Star was vulnerable while the Rebels had the stolen plans.   Tagge’s kind of a walking continuity error to begin with, because everyone kept getting him mixed up with Admiral Motti, the guy who sassed Vader and got choked out for his lack of faith.  In the Archie Goodwin run on Star Wars, Tagge was killed in the movie when the Death Star exploded, but his brothers and sister turned up as recurring villains with a grudge against the Rebels and Vader alike.  Flash forward to 2015, when Disney took over Lucasfilm, and in the new continuity, Tagge survived the Death Star’s destruction because he happened to leave  right before it went to Yavin IV to get blown up.   This was done mainly to set him up as a rival to Darth Vader in the 2015 Darth Vader comic.    I guess they figured there was no reason to invent new characters when they could just salvage some of the officers from the movie.  Tagge feels more authentic than his siblings because we actually saw him on film.   He’s a “real” Star Wars guy, while rest of his family are just cartoons.    I think that’s the attitude anyway.    Back in 1978, they were probably eager to create new characters because they had tons of world-building to do.   So the 2010′s Marvel comics don’t square with the 1970′s Marvel comics at all, especially where the Tagges are concerned, but Darth Vader’s dealings with them feel pretty consistent.   

The reason I bring up all of this is because I used to think that the continuity in Star Wars was never terribly complicated.   When production of  The Force Awakens got started, Lucasfilm announced that they were rebooting the whole Star Wars canon, declaring all the Expanded Universe content as “Legends”, which no longer counted as official continuity.  The only hard canon sources from now on were the movies, the Clone Wars TV series, and anything published after that announcement.   Naturally, all the post-Return-of-the-Jedi stories would be off the board, which only made sense to me, seeing as Force Awakens would contradict it.   But I figured the other stories could still be made to fit together somehow, since none of them had anything to do with Rey or Kylo Ren or the First Order, or whatever.   

But really, it’s been like that all along.    The novels and comics would introduce some idea, and others would build on it, and then George Lucas would override it with his next project.   Then the writers would have to pick up the pieces.  The 2008-2013 Clone Wars TV series trampled on a lot of continuity from the 2002-2005 Clone Wars books and comics, primarily because George Lucas worked on the TV series, and he was the final word on this stuff.   That announcement in 2014 pissed off a lot of Expanded Universe fans (so much that they bought a bunch of billboards to complain about it), but it was kind of inevitable.   They’ll probably have to wipe the slate clean again around 2040 or so, because there’ll be enough new movies that the comics and novels won’t align with them.

I sort of half-joke about my own fanfiction getting this kind of treatment.   My goal is to write stories that could fit into the established continuity, but I can only work with the continuity I know.    With Dragon Ball, that was easy, until Dragon Ball Super got underway, and Akira Toriyama started writing new stuff.    It was pretty easy to write my own female Super Saiyan, until DBS introduced a couple of their own, and now I have to wonder if they’ll say or do something that might contradict my own take.    Likewise, this Broly movie might establish some new lore that I need to take into consideration.    I can write new material to work around those things, but the stuff I’ve already written is pretty much locked in.    My private joke is that in any of these new animations, a character will just stare at the screen and coldly announce that “Mike’s fanfic never happened.”  

But that’s pretty much what Lucasfilm has been doing to the novel and comics writers for over forty years.    “Splinter of the Mind’s Eye” would have been the official sequel to Star Wars if Empire Strikes Back hadn’t been funded.   Instead, Dengar and Bossk looked at the screen and said “Alan Dean Foster’s novel never happened.”    Return of the Jedi killed every Luke/Leia shipper’s hopes and dreams.    “Oh, those fanfics never happened, my young friend,” Ben Kenobi said from beyond the grave.    Attack of the Clones wreaked all sorts of havoc on Boba Fett’s backstory.   The Force Awakens wrecked the Skywalker-Solo family tree.   “Han and Leia only had one kid, and I’m gonna kick his ass!” Rey shouted asskickingly.   And on it goes.    I read that one writer resigned after they retconned all the stuff she had set up about Boba Fett’s home planet, but that’s the way the game is played, unfortunately.   

Me, I’m just writing my stuff for fun, when it comes down to it.    I like to think all the continuity can be fit together, but the reality is that there’s too many redundant pieces, so they can’t all be part of the same picture.  You can either have Tagge or his brothers, but not both.   You can decide to keep Ben Solo or Jan and Jeice Solo from the EU novels, but not both.    Or you can do an AU, I guess.    They’re all AU’s when you get down to it.   

I suppose that, no matter what, I prefer my own assumption that Luke just didn’t have a lightsaber between Empire and Jedi.    I’ve read too many stories about how there’s more to a Jedi than his lightsaber, and how the best Jedi never use them at all, so it makes sense to me that Luke had to make due without one, and use the loss to force him to refocus on his training.    While the others searched for Han, he was doing cool Jedi homework that he should have been doing on Dagobah, and he purposely waited until he was finished before building a new lightsaber.   That just makes too much sense to me, even if some other version is presented.   But the other stories are still fun to read.   They don’t have to be canon to be enjoyable.