#this is especially Not Fun if you're just reading for research to learn better expressions etc for your own writing... sigh...

[sxcret-garden-archive]

,

[2soulscollide]

tips to level up your writing skills

1. read, read, read

okay, I know, everyone keeps saying it... but it's true, and I truly believe the more you read, the better you write, because you come across different writing styles, different voices, new characters, and worlds. This applies to every writer, from amateur to professional.

2. practice makes perfect

another cliché, right.

but hear me out: I feel so much more confident about my writing skills when I write daily, rather than when I write a bit occasionally. you get lots of work done, see your book coming to life, and get better at it.

3. create an outline before you start writing

guysss, I know many people like to go with the flow, but I would recommend planning your novel before writing it, especially if it is one of your first projects.

when I started, I refused to plot my novel because I thought it was a waste of time, and I couldn't plan it all ahead. turns out that I could never finish my novels, because I started to get lost in the plot. as most of you may know, I LOVEEE to plot now!

4. use active voice instead of passive voice

passive voice is alright sometimes. I like to use it, too. but to create an immersive experience for the reader, you should go for the active voice since it creates more impact.

see something like this:

"the letter was written by Marcus who had tears in his eyes." VS "Marcus wrote the letter with tears in his eyes."

such a basic example (don't judge me!!)... but can you notice the difference? it seems so much more expressive.

5. avoid using overly complex language

repeat it after me: short. sentences. are. valid.

don't overcomplicate it! I know it's tempting to write huge sentences sometimes and make your book seem more complex and professional, but sometimes it just doesn't come out as expected, and we end up exhausting our readers.

6. don't just for yourself

this can be a polemic topic. it's quite common to see people saying you should write for yourself, but let's be honest here: if you're trying to get your book published, you should have your target public in mind while developing your book. knowing your audience to know what works and what doesn't work is extremely important. but hey, you must also enjoy what you're writing!

7. use dialogue!!!

I find dialogue so important, and I love it so much! ensure you develop a distinctive voice for your characters to make them seem real to the reader. also, if possible, read the dialogue out loud and imagine if it would work out in real life.

8. don't be afraid to use metaphors

metaphors will turn a "basic" work into something more sophisticated when applied in the right places. you might want to avoid overusing it because it can ruin the experience, but it's something up to you, and what feels better to you.

9. research your topic before writing

okay, this is pretty self-explanatory. if you're writing about a topic or a location you don't know much about, avoid making assumptions or clichés. instead, do some research, take notes, or even ask chatgpt questions to help you.

10. don't be afraid to experiment and try new things

I was a fanfiction writer for a long time and was so scared to try original fiction because it seemed so much different from what I was accustomed to doing. however, once I decided to try something new, I discovered I liked to do it more than fanfiction. you'll never know until you try it!

11. never give up on your writing, keep practicing and learning to improve your skills

it takes time to acquire new skills, so if you're new to writing, please don't give up! It's fun and a long path, and I promise you'll love it, even more, the more you write!

I hope this was helpful! <3 have a nice day

also, i just released a new freebie!!! it's a free workbook for writers with over 90 pages to guide you through the process of plotting a novel. you might be interested in checking it out!! :D click here

[devildom-drabbles]

hihi !! i have a request: how would the obey me cast react to a drunk! MC. specifically lucifer, satan, diavolo & solomon. if you're uncomfortable writing this, then ignore this request, lol !! <3

Not a problem! Just to forewarn you all, there will be mentions of alcohol, being drunk, getting sick, and hangovers. Thanks for the prompt! Enjoy!

How would Lucifer, Satan, Diavolo, and Solomon react to MC being drunk?

Lucifer will act annoyed by MC’s drunken stupor, saying things like, “Why did you let yourself drink so much?  Behave yourself.”  Even so, whether he’s right next to them or on the other side of the room, he’s keeping a close eye on them.  He won’t humor any of their romantic advances if others are around, but if it’s just the two of them, he’ll reciprocate some of it—his tone teasing or affectionate depending on the situation.  When he can tell that they shouldn’t be drinking anymore, he’ll snatch away any alcoholic beverage they try to get their hands on.  He’ll bring them to his room when they pass out so that none of his brothers can bother them while they’re sleeping.  He’ll lightly scold them the next day for going overboard with their drinking, only stopping when they express discomfort from their hangover, which will prompt him to fetch something that’ll help them feel better.

Satan will be a bit startled at first, but he’ll quickly take advantage of the situation as a way to learn more about MC—without crossing any lines, though.  He’ll do this mainly by observing their interactions and occasionally asking questions to hear their thoughts about him, his brothers, and things he’s curious about, like what’s their ideal date (you know...for “research” purposes).  He’s able to tell from both their physical and nonverbal cues if they’re about to be sick, so he’ll rush them to the nearest trash can or bathroom before anything happens.  He’ll also immediately hype them up if they get into an argument with anyone who’s with them but will scare off their (possibly equally drunk) opponent before things can get too intense.  Later on, MC will wake up to him sitting next to them on his bed while he’s reading about how alcohol affects humans.  When he hears them call their name in a raspy voice, he’ll hurry to grab a glass of water for their dry throat and anything else they might need based on what he’s read.

Diavolo will be surprised by how MC behaves when they’re drunk, especially if it reveals a new side to them or they admit things he never knew before.  He’ll ensure that they’re within arm’s reach while they’re in this state, wanting to prevent them from getting hurt due to their lowered attentiveness to their surroundings.  If they’re playful or affectionate, such as going over to hug him a lot or wanting him to dance with them, he’ll happily join in their actions—even more so if the two of them are already in a relationship.  He’ll become worried if they start to have trouble walking or holding a conversation and will seek Barbatos’s advice for properly caring for the drunken human.  He’ll stay with them until they’re fully recovered the next day and let them know what happened when they were drunk if they don’t remember anything.  If they ask him to, he’ll promise to keep certain things that they blurted out a secret.

Solomon will be amused by MC’s drunken behavior, and he might record some of the things they say and do to show them when they’re sober.  He’ll tag along with them wherever they go for the sake of their safety, but he’s having fun the whole time.  They decide to start rambling about something?  He’s all ears, especially if the topic involves how they feel about him.  They want to do something semi-dangerous in their uncoordinated state, like climb up a statue or do a handstand?  In many scenarios, he’ll encourage them while also using magic to protect them from potential injuries.  (If it’s something truly dangerous, he’ll steer them away from the idea by distracting them.)  He’ll only become serious—even intimidating—if anyone tries to manipulate MC while they’re inebriated.  When MC wakes up hungover the next day, he’ll give them a magic-infused remedy that improves their condition before proceeding to tease them about everything they did while they were drunk.

[ackee]

I am Filipino and I love researching about different cultures and character design. Miss Mani I really love your OC's and how diverse they are! Especially Naomi and Xia! The way you also design gijinka is also great! You're a huge inspo cuz I was so afraid of expressing my culture in my drawings and seeing you just having fun with your stuff makes me go crazy when I make my own characters! To the point that I made a whole story where it's just filled with SEAsian with different backgrounds ahhhh sorry I will stop rambling again miss Mani I hope you have a good day!

THANK U!!!! 🫶🏽💥‼️🥰

im glad i can inspire you to go hog wild.. trust me there are people who want to read your stories that are so entrenched in your culture that it cant be told without it 😮‍💨🫰🏾(and those people are ME)

nothings better than learning about people different than you.. i hope i can continue to do that w/ my work :] <3 muah!

[v-anrouge]

Oh this sounds so fun! I’ve never had a matchup done before!

I have no real physical preferences for people- I do tend to favor more unconventional appearances though! I love interesting looking/unique features. I have a unique aesthetic myself, and I really love when others put effort into their appearances as well! I often gravitate towards emotionally available and responsible people- it’s important that our values have some alignment. I’m relatively responsible but I’m also incredibly anxious so I am fond of others who can balance out my more neurotic tendencies.

I read a lot (mostly non fiction) and really enjoy learning! I have an odd knack for research papers, and I just generally love sharing information with others (though I could never see myself becoming a teacher by profession).

I also cook frequently! Cooking is a way that I express my love for people, and my primary love languages are gift giving and acts of service while I love to receive gifts and words of affirmation.

I can be quite competitive when it comes to academics, but this does bleed over into my interests and hobbies- ESPECIALLY video games. I’m a completionist and I will aim to be the best at even the most trivial mini game. I also love making clothes, painting, and making jewelry <3

pairing you up with rook! (what a surprise)

rook and you are genuinely soulmates like no one will convince him otherwise, you two match in so many ways it fascinates him, it makes him want to discover more and more about you he feels like he just can't enough

rook is so obsessed with your aesthetic and the way you present yourself, you can often catch him just staring at you with a dreamy smile and eyes that are exploding with emotions, shining brighter than a firework show

despite his silly and teasing nature rook is a very mature person who dislikes conflict and would much rather sit and communicate than keep anything hidden from anyone he cares about, especially if that someone is his lover. it's like rook can sense whenever your body starts to feel even slightly anxious because immediately he'll be looking at you and coming up with an excuse to quickly get the both of you away from the situation and take you to a place that calms you down and where you feel safe, he's someone that is fascinated by the human brain so he'll do lots and lots of research and even sit down with you and take notes about your condition so that he can have a better understanding of how to help you and how to comfort you, he'll always be there by your side, and he won't leave until you're 100% sure you're okay

rook LOVES reading AND writing so if you two can engage in that together he'll really really love it, especially if you don't mind physical affection and let him lay his head on you, but if you're not a fan of it he won't complain at all, just having you by his side warms his little heart. he loves your curiosity and the way you're passionate towards sharing information, he always has the biggest smile as he hears you talk about something you researched recently and he himself will do researches about it so he can engage more in a possible next convo about the topic. HE LOVES COOKING OKAY THATS AN HC YOU'LL NEVER TAKE AWAY FROM ME. he loves cooking with you and he makes sure t make everything so fucking cheesy like he's playing some songs you both like he's flirting with you as he cooks he's such a fucking loser if he was a dog his tail would be wagging so fast it would cause a hurricane

rook is a tad competitive himself and he can't help but find that side of you quite attractive and amusing, he'll definitely love to engage in silly competitions with you, his prize is looking at your determined expression and the way you proudly present your skills

please let him record and take pictures of your creations, please he loves your designs so much they're so priceless to him especially if you make one that is made for him to wear like he's almost too afraid of ruining to wear but also he's SO excited to see how it looks in him it's torture, save him 💔 you're both people that are passionate about art and he can't enough of that fact, if you two ever move in together (please say yes please say yes please say yes please say yes plea-) the house will be filled to the brim with art pieces and if you don't stop him he'll dead ass make a private museum to show off your artwork to whoever comes to visit your home

[blindmagdalena]

Hey, just seen you talking about you being an experienced dnd player/dm. Super interested to know about it as I'm looking to start soon. I have also just started playing BG3 which I love. I really have wanted to get into a ttrpg for ages, and there's an opportunity to start a campaign at last. I wanna know how you begin creating your characters? There's so much lore and I find it overwhelming, but so exciting. My problem is u want to create the character RIGHT NOW, but I still need to leave room for research.

first of all, BG3 is a GREAT introduction to D&D 5e! they really did a superb job translating the rules into video game mechanics. even some of my seasoned D&D players expressed that BG3 helped them understand the game better. getting into those two simultaneously is really going to help that learning curve imo.

as for character creation, start vanilla. just the basic rules, classes and races. you can expand into the other source books when you're a little more familiar, but all you really need to start as a player is the players handbook.

you'll definitely find yourself drawn to things as you go. spellcasters are generally more complicated (especially wizards) but if that's what you're drawn to, go for it. make sure you're starting at level 1! starting higher as a new player can be really, really overwhelming because the characters do get sooo many features and abilities.

the internet is your friend! the books can be a little difficult to navigate, but i can guarantee any question you might have has been answered. probably on reddit.

i've been playing long enough now that character creation is a pretty breezy process for me. generally i'll figure out what flavor of character i want to do ("i want a strange little swamp man.") and then i'll start figuring out what class that would best suit ("oohh, druid from a swamp that only turns into swamp animals.") and race usually comes last ("what if he was a wood elf with a cajun accent...")

the lore will come as you continue to play and read the materials. you'll get more experienced and more adventerous. you might branch out into the expanded source books, or maybe you'll get into homebrew and start making up your own stuff! the best part of ttrpgs is they really are what you make of them.

this got rambly but i hope it was helpful! have so, so much fun. 🖤

[dourpeep]

i have even more ideas now...

what about like the moment you open up about your relationship with kazuxiao the fans who were already seeing that happen were celebrating and on both of y'alls insta or something is where you announce and it's like a picture of all 3 of you chilling together or something

and then when they finally appear on a variety show they're just questioned throughly and they talk about how you guys meet and what they like about you

ok but the moments where you just feel sort of insecure since being an idol is hard and you're technically dating your seniors and you're just hit by the antis who are against yourself relationship so you lock yourself in your room in your dorm by yourself to cope. your roommate (can be whoever) contacts them both and they immediately come over and come in and offer soft kisses and soft murmurs of reassurance that they'll never leave you and that everything's gonna be ok.

side note i can see xiao just being a whole meme without realizing?? for like variety shows he's just known for his dead pan expression and then i can see him being so competitive on shows like running man..mans ripping tags left and right, while kazuhas just hiding in a weird spot or something

kazuha on the other hand i can see him being a troll, he likes to mess around with the hosts of the show and manages to mess up some of their plans, he also likes messing with his group members, where xiao likes to say that kazuha looks innocent but is a part of the devil line with venti

onto albedo i can see him like answering questions in his vlive and fans realize that a lot of his songs are more romantic and sort of pining?? and they're asking where the motivation is from. he answers that it's just something that he saw recently so he felt motivated (it wasn't the fact that he had realized that he was 100% in love with you)

but like all of this mans inspiration comes from you, he's had multiple songs dedicated to you before your relationship was even open to the public, and when your relationship finally does, it just clicks for fans and it suddenly makes sense, your ship name trends worldwide for the day

but how you and albedo met, i can see both of you guys being in the industry already and you guys are sort of know each other but it was for a one time off collab with other artists involved so you didn't really talk with each other. like i said before albedos a solo artist while i can see you being a part of a popular group already. but then both of your companies decided to do another collab and especially picked you two since you guys already worked on a collab before.

at first it was like awkward since albedos really socially awkward but then things click when you guys start writing the song together. everything just matches so well?? and you guys just compliment each other?? and that's when you learn of albedo just staying at the studio so late so you often bring food. this leads to you guys getting closer and albedo even stops his work just to talk to you more. when your song comes out and everyone is waiting for the stage, there's just so much tension?? but the good kinda and everyone is awed by the song and the vocals coming from you and albedo.

i can also see the both of you guys appearing on variety shows together too, like appearing on a show where you two travel to another place and experience the culture there, with albedo being your tour guide and showing you all the famous places (one of the many times where fans were awed by his research and knowledge) and then if you guys were to appear together again after you guys reveal your relationship, a lot of the times they show idols as they wake up, they'll see you and albedo being clingy af to each other.

on another side note, albedos totally a troll on variety shows, he likes messing around with the hosts and other contestants since a lot of the time he's not really interested in the show itself, it's more for publicity. however, when he first appeared on a show with you fans noticed that he actually seemed interested for once and that's where your ship name started.

albedos totally a golden child tho, he's like basically perfect in everything so a lot of the times variety shows don't catch him slipping, however the one time that he did was when you were mentioned, the clip of with his ears bright red was trending for a couple of days :)

GIVING ME SO MUCH GOOD FOOD THANK YOU ANON

I think that this covers everything hehehe so I won't add to-

wait wait I put it all under the cut b/c it's a lot again-

Okay okay but like for the 'announcement' picture, what if it's like those photo booth pics (but like each picture you need to scroll through like on Insta) where it's cute and wholesome! The three of you are having fun wearing some silly glasses or hats, doing peace signs or finger hearts....and the very last photo is the three of you sharing a kiss- or, at least trying to.

It's sweet, a little silly, and most of your fans take it really well! After all, they can see the chemistry that you share and can't deny that the three of you would have a good relationship.

As for the insecurities of dating your seniors, Kazuha and Xiao are quick to knock back any of those worries. They love you so, so much and hate the fact that something like that makes you doubt for a single second. If anyone ever tries to bring it up, you know that they're going to immediately quip back.

Naturally, you're roomed with Venven :D He's technically an up-and-coming after he stopped doing idol stuff for a few years, so not only does he know the ropes, but he's also one of your biggest fans and biggest supports (outside of Kazuha and Xiao).

Though he's silly and light-hearted, he's quick to recognize when things are serious and need handling.

So as soon as he sees that you're not doing so great or if he notices the comments on your posts are going in a bad direction, he speed dials Xiao and the two of your boyfriends are right at the door in under 15.

Not only are they fast about it, but they have all your favorite snacks, a movie or two, some popcorn, and a ton of love and affection because they'll be damned if their love is going to be affected by some asshole's comments about their love life! What do they know anyway??

Actually this all could work too if Kazuha and Xiao are part of 4NEMO-

Hmmm

That'd cause so much more ruckus- not only is half of one of the most popular idol groups are taken, but by the same person??? And each other??? Man, that's wack.

BUT THE GAMESHOWS

Xiao would most certainly be super intense with those. He just can't help it--competition drives his blood and makes something snap in him. He's dead serious about doing well, regardless of the game. I actually have never watched said game shows, but--

Like...he's out for blood. No one is safe. Not even you or Kazuha if you're on opposing teams, though he'll be a bit more gentle. Maybe even with the hint of a smile while you have an expression of utter shock at the fact that he's just so fast-

Or if it's not a game show and instead you're doing some sort of idol group activity with a few others to get to know each other?

Someone suggests ping pong and, knowing how competitive Xiao gets, he's pitted up against Tartaglia and man. That's scary. There's no doubt that someone would clip the video and make it into an overly-dramatic retelling complete with music.

Hilarious.

As for Kazuha! He'd be a bit of a mish mosh! He enjoys poking fun at others, and he's so sly! Those poor hosts don't realize that he's goading them on, but sure enough--he is. Who knew that his charming smile and mild-mannered attitude could be so devastating?

But even then, he's mostly wholesome! There's a lot of little clips, mostly of your doing, of him in a 'kiss the chef' apron getting caught off guard while cooking something up. The videos aren't great because you're giggling while recording and he ends up placing the ladle down calmly before wrapping you up in his arms. Half the video ends up being the two of you laughing and joking while it's pointed at a weird angle towards the counter.

Sometimes it'll point just right and you'll get a half-blurred view of Xiao sitting at the kitchen island with his reading glasses perched on his nose and book forgotten. He tends to get up and join in for a few smooches before reminding Kazuha of the food that's still cooking.

--

Albedo!! He absolutely is the golden child. He's fantastic handling things under pressure in a cool, calm manner. Handsome, charismatic, incredibly smart--man's hit all the stops and just keeps going.

It's not until it comes out that the two of you are together that his cool façade (hardly one, though) falters and at the mere mention of you, he'll go soft. There's a tenderness in his eyes, a small smile on his lips, and his blush? Absolutely adorable. How can anyone object when he's obviously so in love with you?

And the idea you mentioned with the two of you traveling and experiencing stuff together sounds so cute (':

He particularly enjoys exploring new cuisine, so expect him to feed you some food from his plate-

There's also a few times where you two have gotten lost in the new places, more because you're both so busy taking in the sights to realize you've taken five wrong turns- But then you make it into a whole adventure, foregoing the map and deciding to wander around. What better way to discover and learn about somewhere than getting lost and wandering?

You find quite a few hidden gems this way since otherwise you'd be hitting more popular areas!

Wait- do they really show idols waking up???

Ahh regardless, Albedo's definitely a cuddler. He loves it, can't get enough of it. It's not often that he gets a good night's rest, but with you it seems like he's fully recharged and ready for the day! It's cute too because it doesn't matter--big spoon or little spoon, you on his chest or him resting on yours. Even a few times with you facing each other with your hands intertwined.

I also agree that Albedo would mess with the game show's hosts and contestants. Not only would he, but he'd be entirely smug about it (after all, we need to have that #smugbedo going on).

No doubt, there's been times where the cameras even focus/zoom in on him where he's sitting because he's got that smirk on his face.

[alatismeni-theitsa]

Hi! Hope you're doing well <3 I been reading some of your posts about LO and Greek culture in general! And as a non-greek I think your culture is amazing and it should be respected as any other culture, so, I had this question a little while ago

I made a couple of characters based on greek myth creatures, and I kinda had a story for them in an ancient greek inspired world (highly inspired tbh, I think it might take place in an ancient greek ambience as well), but now I think that might be insensitive (?) I don't know how to express it, but I just want to know, would it be ok if I continue with that idea or should I scratch it?

TIIIME TO FINALLY ANSWER THIS

I am really sorry for the long wait! I was trying to think how to answer this properly and also mustering the energy for it xD I will pin it so you can find it more easily, if you come back to the blog.

For starters, you can write whatever you wish. I am hesitant to say to people “you can't write this and that” because it might make people feel estranged and uncomfortable and I believe that distance serves no real purpose. Yes, it’s likely that a xenos won’t be making the story VERY culturally accurate but if the story is 30% culturally accurate as opposed to barely 5% which we see in the popular media today, then it’s still a win. Not to mention that Greeks themselves are not 100% culturally accurate most of the time in their Greek mythology stories. This happens because 1) Americanization has hit us hard 2) They write them just for fun without bothering to research much. We are also lucky if we have a 30% accuracy in our texts most of the time.

(I love percentages if you can’t tell 😂)

You might have figured out I have the tag #writing (and perhaps also #writing advice ??) where I answer these type of questions, so visiting it might help! I'm not gonna tell you if you can write it or not - you can write whatever you like - but I would advise you to treat the Greek culture like any other real or fictional culture. Do a proper “worldbuilding”, let’s say.

THE CREATURES

As you know, some are more serious and some are more playful. They don’t easily “switch” from their behaviors so it’s best to keep a serious creature serious and a playful creature playful throughout most of the story. Some reading is needed, to figure out how the ancient Greeks saw those creatures. Because assumptions are usually not helpful. If we have no clues about their behavior, that’s free real estate I guess 😂

Now, if you are going for the “almost like Greek culture but not quite” thing, that still needs similar studying. You need to know where you are basing those creatures and how they see their world - or how the world sees them. And what elements make sense to change.

You can still not base the characters nowhere and just have a gal with snakes in her head. You can do that xD However, if you like to be more in touch with the culture you need to use some context and the “ambience” you talked about. It’s another thing to say “this gal has snakes on her head“ and another to say “this is THE Medusa“.

Some Greek culture needs to shine through. I mean, it would be great if it could shine though in general, so your references and basis to Greek mythology are better. It would be safe to assume the ancient folklore creatures have some Greek culture in them since they have Greek names, they have been written in Greek stories behaving according to the Greek societal rules and ethics, and generally being symbols in Greece until our days. And your story is about Greek mythology, so you want to emphasize the Greek aspects of your heroes and world.

THE ANCIENT GREEK INSPIRED WORLD

I don't know what research you’ve done so far but I will begin from the basics anyways. Ancient Greek ambience, as you can probably guess, is not “chitons, wine, vines and white pillars” 😂 The ambience specifically doesn’t come from the aesthetics but from the feel of it - the food, the customs, the symbols, the dances, the language interjections, the behaviors and values. Parts of the culture are also how is reverence and modesty are expressed, what makes someone present “manly“ or “feminine”. So, it’s gonna take some research.

People usually write some of the aesthetic and think they are covered, even though their worldbuilding is bad, precisely because they have only presented the very top of the iceberg. No food, no dances, no certain behaviors, nothing. You could say they are “soulless Disney remakes”. 😂 You can also do that, but you need to know how it will come out. It might be quite bland and, if I am not mistaken, you said you want to avoid that. (And I think most of Greeks would tell you that they don’t mind a Greek “soulless” remake but it would be super extra great if you put cultural elements in).

Ok, I don’t mean make it like an encyclopedia, but presenting some stuff from the culture is how you get the ambience. You might as well take a writing advice list for worlbuilding stuff you must have and see which ones you can find irl from the Greek culture.

Important! Remember that nearby cultures affect each other, so if you change one element from the Greek culture it’s likely it has to be changed in other cultures next to your area. If wearing green makes you manly in Imaginary Greece, it will also make you manly in Imaginary Turkey and Imaginary Bulgaria, let’s say. (there is no “ancient Turkey” or “ancient Bulgaria” as countries - and depending on the era, “ancient Greece” is also not a thing - but you get my point xD)

For the interpersonal relationships/interactions, you can read some ancient translated texts presenting daily life situations of the ancient Greeks (start from Googling stuff, I really don’t have sources for that xD). It’s very likely that the ancient sources won’t give you a very defined feel (try it anyways, if you like). Therefore, I suggest you see interactions of modern Greek people.

Worry not! YouTube - through me xD - has you covered! Searching the tags #greek tv #greek youtuber #greek podcast and #video. On youtube you can even find vlogs of people visiting Greece and see interactions with the locals. (If you have trouble finding them, you can send me another ask).

Similarly, it might take months to find all the Greek language interjections so you can go for modern ones. Besides, many interjections like “popoo“ are ancient. Besides, if you are not making a very “serious” story, the modern touches might help it feel more in touch with the present.

Surely, people are people everywhere and humans between countries share cultural traits, but there are some slightly more predominant stuff depending on the culture. Cultures close to each other share more traits, so, if you can’t find any Greeks around, you might be able to find our neighbors. Middle Eastern, north African, or south European people (and Hispanic/Latino Americans!) around might help to understand the dynamics between friends and family members. If you already belong to some of those cultures, congrats, you have most of the formula figured out!

I gave so much space to the interpersonal relationships because that’s gonna give you an idea where the line of “respect” is. Surely, the ancient interpersonal relationships won’t be like the modern American ones  😂 There is no way a student goes to Chiron being like “hey, man, how you doin?” Knowing how Greek teachers were, as late as the 20th century, that’s gonna earn him a slap 😂

Another thing: saying “Good morning” and “good afternoon / goodnight” when you first and last see people in the day is VERY important and the best social practice! You won’t be considered rude if you don’t say them but in a slightly formal and especially professional environment, better use them. (Other modern Europeans also consider this a good practice.)

The most ancient greeting of Greeks is “be happy” (χάιρε / χαίρετε) but health is also very important and is another old greeting. Xάιρετε is more formal in our days and Γεια/Γεια σας ("have good health”) is the most used formal and informal one. Seeing how people wish health in the middle east, it might be that the Health thing has been here for centuries. Also, if you break something or something bad happens to you, we say “health” because having your health is more important than anything else.

Fun fact, “Charon“ (Χάρων) probably means “the happy one” :P It has the same root with (χάιρε / χαίρετε).

Many other social cues can be found in the tags I mentioned, but you can send me an ask if you need to know something more specific!

As for the food, you can find ancient recipes and even use modern ones (which are usually with the same ingredients). Same goes for dances and symbols. You can google stuff about them, go on Google Scholar and search there, as well. (Also, google pages where you can download those papers for free ;) ) Please do some cross examination to make sure that this element indeed exists and it’s not just one person pulling it our of their a**. 😂

If you can’t find info, you can lean on modern symbols and dances. The dances are similar through the centuries anyways. No one is going to come for you if you say you based an element on a modern Greek thing bc the ancient one was impossible to find with the resources available to you.

I don’t have many more things to add on these cultural elements because I already have tags for the modern ones. #greek cuisine #melomakarona #greek dance #greek custom #greek tradition  etc.

And, last but not least, research the weather!! I can't stress this enough 😩 We are not a desert and we are not the Tropics. If your weather is similar to the Greek one, then your creatures most likely will need some serious covering in Autumn and Winter 😂

All in all, it’s certainly not a piece of cake to write about other countries and cultures but, if they are open to let you in, you can learn stuff and do your best depicting them. It might not be perfect (and no work is actually perfect) but it would be a step to the right direction and might encourage more writers to do the same - instead of throwing some chitons in and calling it a day xD

If you have any other questions feel free to send me another message (dm or ask). You - or anyone else - REALLY WON’T BOTHER ME if you ask me many questions on my DMs or here.

[aurevell]

TSC keeps making me think about all the different ways you could possibly do a time loop story. Especially play on person stuck in time loop getting to know other person. But other person not remembering anything that they’ve learned about person in time loop. Like stiles gets stuck in a time loop (why? Who cares) and falls for Peter because he gets to know him. Pulls the martyr card when time loop is fixed and let’s Peter go live his life or whatever (maybe he just doesn’t want to explain how he knows all stuff about Peter? Who knows. Dealer’s choice). Then somehow (lol) Peter gets stuck in a time loop and falls in love with Stiles and slowly starts to realize “hey… wait… why do you know me better than you should” and they finally get on the same page and Stiles helps Peter break the time loop because he’s been there and they live happily ever after lol. Anyway I just love TSC so thank you! 🙈

First off how DARE you send me such an amazing idea that is tailored to my exact personal interests?? When I have already have 10 million fic ideas and no self control and am just one small me?? 😂

But honestly, one thing I really regret about TSC's plot is that because Peter and Stiles are on the road a ton, there's no time for the usual "fun time loop shenanigans" that happen when you loop in the same place on repeat (except toward the very end of TSC, because of secret plot reasons).

BUT in a different story, how much fun would it be for Stiles to just show up at Peter's undisclosed-location apartment one day knowing everything about him- like, "hey how's it going dude, wanted to borrow that one bestiary from your personal library, brought your usual takeout order in return, did you get that stupid text from Derek yet because we can make fun of him together, also tell me how that 'secret' hunter research is going." And Peter is mystified, wary, and turned on, all of which are expressions he's 100% unwilling to show on his face lmao

During Peter's loop, that kind of visit might not be *as* surprising for Stiles, because I think at a certain point after experiencing a time loop himself, Stiles would realize "OH MY GOD YOU'RE LOOPING TOO oh god please don't dig into my secret life dude." Especially given that Stiles now has a Thing for Peter and would be flustered at the thought that Peter could put two and two together. But Peter's middle name is basically Turnabout Is Fair Play, except that he only uses this information to his personal advantage which in this particular case is to Stiles's advantage too, because yes they would have to live happily ever after.

Oh man I want to read this story without writing it 😱

ANYWAY I adore you for this, it's gonna be in my brain all day in the best possible way, drop by anytime lmao 💖💖

[mothdrawzzz]

Before reading this, think about how you would answer this question "is digital art real art?"

------------------------------------------------------------

What is digital art?

Digital art is an art form or that uses digital technology instead of traditional mediums.

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Why is digital art important?

The future is digital, and with that art is changing to meet that.

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Pros of digital art!

- it is much easier to keep all your art in one place

- it's easier to share your art

- it is usually cheaper, all you need is a device! so no need to keep on buying art supplies.

- no need to erase your mistakes, thanks to the undo button

------------------------------------------------------------

Cons of digital art

- the chance of losing your art. programs can crash, devices could break, memory could get lost, etc

- no physical copy

- having to learn the programs you use

- your art can get stolen easily

------------------------------------------------------------

Pros of traditional art

- unique pieces

- more hands on experience ------------------------------------------------------------

Cons of traditional art

- more of a mess

- harder to fix mistakes (this could be both pro or con depending on how you look at it.)

------------------------------------------------------------

In the survey I asked if they believed if digital art was real art and they all said yes, this question was very important for me to ask because there is a negative out look on digital art.

I also asked why they believed that and here are some of the responses I got

------------------------------------------------------------

"In digital art you are still taking the time to make something. You're making lines, choosing colors, blending things, etc"

I was glad to see this response, when I was researching I saw that one of the main reasons they didn't see digital art as real art was because it was "cheating" and that it was less work than traditional. which I honestly don't believe, your still putting in time and effort into what your making. and I know that for a lot of digital artists it can take hours to finish a piece especially if it has a lot of detail.

------------------------------------------------------------

"I feel like digital art is real because it doesn't matter how art is made. If people think "real" art requires experience and skill (like painting, sculpting, etc.), digital art requires the same amount, and I feel that if you make art on a computer, tablet, phone, or whatever you use to make digital art, you're using as much skill as you would be drawing or painting something on paper. Even though digital art provides a smoother experience as opposed to art on paper, both have their upsides and downsides. While I feel like digital art can feel artificial, that's because I haven't gone into the area enough to be comfortable drawing in it. But this is definitely not the same for everyone, and I believe people are more comfortable, natural, and skilled with digital art than "real" art, which is why I believe digital art IS real art, because the artists behind those digital works have the same skill and comfort as the artists doing it on paper."

This was my favorite response I got and I think it explains itself

------------------------------------------------------------

"You can do the same things as traditional art with digital art and sometimes better. Same thing vice versa."

Yes! I agree, with different type of brushes and stuff you can do within programs you can almost do anything. yes it may look a bit artificial but I have seen artist make digital pieces that looked like traditional ones.

------------------------------------------------------------

"Art can be expressed in any shape or form. Doesn't matter how you use it, what matters is using your imagination and creating something."

What I personally believe that if you intend something to be art and it comes from your imagination and you're creating it then it's art

------------------------------------------------------------

I then asked which was more important to them and these were the results.

I asked this because I was genuinely curious with they would pick, these results were no surprise to me I kind of figured that traditional art was going to win but I was happy to see that digital art was only a little under half. With me asking this question I also asked why they choose what they did and here are some of their responses .

------------------------------------------------------------

"It's something that of course has been here for a long long time. It's something I am so accustomed to already."

I like this response because another reason that kept coming up when talking with others about this topic was that the reason people didn't like digital art is because it was newer, not around as long and that it intimidated people. My art instructor said that it was a generation thing and that older generations didn't understand it.

------------------------------------------------------------

"I feel like digital art has a lot of potential and can be changed any time, at ease too. I think digital art and traditional art are equally important, as both have their pros and cons, but I feel like I've had a better experience being exposed to more kinds of digital art over traditional, but that's not to belittle the power of traditional art, where you get a better sensation of life to something that's physically drawn opposed to digitally drawn. But digital art is more important to me mainly because of the experiences I've had with so far. I'm honestly thinking both are as good, but I'm choosing digital on this one."

I really like how they explained how both were important! in my opinion I see them as equal but I agree the experience thing.

------------------------------------------------------------

Which is important to me? tough question but I'd say digital!

Digital art taught me more and let me grow more as an artist. I didn't have anyone to help when I first started out so I had to learn it all on my own, however with traditional art, most of my friends were artist and we're able to give me tips. so my digital art journey is more significant to me than traditional art. but I'll never forget were I started.

------------------------------------------------------------

Here are some other questions I asked and the results.

These results were the most surprising, first I'm surprised no one said harder because I thought that some of the people who don't really do digital art regularly would think it was harder. What surprised me the most however was the fact that 80% said they were the same because I didn't even think anyone would put that and it was almost not even going to be an option. I personally think both are hard but I'd say traditional is harder because I typically sketch things out traditionally and then turn them digitally so all my planning is done in the traditional stage.

------------------------------------------------------------

I also asked which they thought took more time. I kept seeing while researching that people were saying digital art took less time, which I don't necessarily believe but I want to see what others thought.

I wasn't surprised with the outcome, it typically takes less time for me to complete a digital piece then a traditional one, so I thought it would be generally the same for others. Not to say that it doesn't take long to do a digital piece, especially for people who take time to do backgrounds, shading, blending, etc. I was glad to see that for some people it takes longer to do because I was unsure if people were going to put that.

------------------------------------------------------------

I was excited for this question! I was generally curious what other people thought because I think that digital art personally does take a different skill set than traditional art but at the same time I feel as for some people it doesn't. I feel like it depends on the person's style.

I didn't think that there would be more no than there was yes so I was glad I asked this question :)

------------------------------------------------------------

I wanted to know if they knew that some people saw digital art negatively.

I was surprised I didn't get all yes, but at the same time I was glad that there were people who haven't heard about how digital art is seen as negative.

I also asked what kind of stuff they heard and here are some of the responses

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"I've heard things along the lines of "digital art isn't real art", "digital artists are fake artists", and "digital art is inferior".

------------------------------------------------------------

"Some people say it’s harder or more confusing but when u get used to it then it’s easier than traditional."

------------------------------------------------------------

"its not real art" "it doesn't count as art"

------------------------------------------------------------

"People taking advantage of it and making disgusting art, can get stolen easily"

------------------------------------------------------------

Most of the things that were said I already covered however with the last one, "people taking advantage of it and making disgusting art" I feel like with any form of art that happens, it's just more common to see digital art like that because it is more shared on the internet.

------------------------------------------------------------

The last question I decided to ask was for fun, but I wanted to know what programs if they were a digital artist that they used so if you would like to try digital art for yourself here are some programs to start. :)

ibis paint

This is the program I use and I think it's the best free program out there.

Autodesk SketchBook

This is a program I started with and it worked well.

fire alpaca

I've never used this program but it's free and from what I heard it's a good program.

Photoshop

I'm unsure how much this cost, I've only ever really used Photoshop for class until today when I connected my tablet and I find it a fun place to sketch.

Procreate

This program is $9.99 and it is only for iOS. I know a lot of digital arts use this program. but I also heard that ibis paint was better, that's how I actually found out about ibis, however I've never used procreate so I don't know how true that statement is.

Microsoft paint

I'm pretty sure most people have used Microsoft paint once in there life's, it's free and on most laptops and I've seen people make really cool pixel art on there.

[douchebagbrainwaves]

WHEN YOU'RE DRINKING THROUGH A STRAW, YOU CAN WATCH THEM LEARN BY DOING

If you can develop technology that's simply too hard for one person. Raise money first from leads you get yourself.1 What happened to the Milanese Leonardo? I evolved another trick for partitioning the day. Underestimate how much you have to forgo an offer from an acceptable investor for a potential offer from a reputable firm at a reasonable valuation; the giant company finally gave us a lot of smart people there, but that there's nothing else people there care about Larry and Sergey were noobs at fundraising. Whereas incubators tend or tended to exert more control than VCs, Y Combinator exerts less. You look at them and you think, oh good, now everything will be all right?

You do tend to get so rich from them.2 When I say there may only be one name on the wall next to it in the museum. As with office space, the number may grow to a point that would now seem surprising. In a company, because one or more founders focusing on the company. The manager's schedule is for bosses. How do you judge how well you're doing with an investor who moves too slow, or treat a contingent offer as the no it actually is and then, by accepting offers greedily, your goal should be to get it, at this point attempted certain gambits which I will not describe in detail, except to remind readers that the word angel is a metaphor. Maybe it will turn out to be an outsider.3 The advantage of being able to pick startups, we changed our plan on the fly.4

Ideally you want between two and four founders.5 In the earliest phases, a lot of wiggle room.6 Even though Y Combinator is as different from what they expected?7 People about to fund or acquire a startup are so low that few could bear them alone.8 Don't push it too far.9 When you offer x percent of the wealth. And what I discovered was that business was no great mystery.10 If there's something we can do to encourage the process? As a Lisp hacker. But TV was still young in 1960; only 87% of households had it. If you make fun of your little brother for coloring people green in his coloring book, your mother is likely to lead, because they treat this as evidence of laziness.

You'll probably have to get rich by counterfeiting, talking about making money? But that's not the same thing. This doesn't work well. You can do whatever you want with money from consulting or friends and family. It happened to cloth manufacture in the thirteenth century, generating the wealth that later brought about the Renaissance. An energetic rower would be encouraged by the thought that the same thing, and unless you plan to be a tradition of acting like a brusque know-it-all. Sometimes the VCs want to install a new CEO of their own angel rounds. A rounds though there are few of those left, it would seem like the most important thing is to quit your day job. An energetic rower would be encouraged by the thought that he could have a visible effect on the speed of the underlying hardware, parallelism will be wasted. Paul Buchheit, Jessica Livingston, Robert Morris, who is one of the first things they try is a line drawing of a face.11

When the idea is embodied in the name. A rounds, but in this case: slow down your interactions with them. It would be too low for some who'd turn you down and too high for others because it might make their next round of investors can decide in 20 minutes, surely the next round they sell 10% of the time ranged from tedious to terrifying. Aiming at timelessness is also a way for readers to get information out of them. Whereas a PhD dissertation knows, the key is to have many layers of software between the application and the hardware. Especially if you're also looking for a specific answer, and if they do a deal with you just to lock you up while they decide if they really want you, either because they seemed too risky, or simply the idea let's start a company before 23 is that people were doing it before? Before us, most companies won't let hackers do what they want either. Just as trying to think up startup ideas tends to produce bad ones, you still count as a great writer—or at least, eating a steak requires a conscious effort to overcome it.12

Not necessarily, but probably.13 Surely many of these people, beware. How do you be a good rule of thumb is not to sell more than 25% in phase 2, yes. Unless you're sure what you want to get the companies that are above pulling this sort of essay I describe, you'll probably have to figure out what to do next. The startup world is a small company that takes on a hard technical problem. But what people have now is often so bad that it doesn't take brilliance to do better.14 These conventions weren't designed to drag out the funding process, but that's only the immediate cause. It's because staying close to the main branches of an evolutionary tree. This could lose you some that might have made an offer if they had more time. You just can't fry eggs or cut hair one customer at a time. He followed that advice. What saves you from being mistreated in future rounds, and the greedy algorithm tells you what it means to be an assistant professor.

Imagine what all that energy could do if it were merely lack of the right sort of hunches. I've forgotten the details of the process.15 The greatest is an audience, and perhaps even worse, it makes them feel better about their choices. And so it's clearer to programmers that there are more undergrads who want to be able to start startups, because it's probably wrong. You should of course have your lawyer review everything. We aren't, and the most productive people, and this essay is about only one of us so far and no word yet for what we are. Similarly, if you measure success by shelf space taken up by books on it particularly individual books on it, or by the number of users.

Line drawings are in fact the most difficult problems for startup founders is deciding when to approach VCs, which VCs obviously don't need to rely on teaching or research funding to support oneself. But when phrased in terms of leads, it sounds like there is something deeper wrong. If you do well, you will probably raise a series A, there's obviously an exception if you end up with less stock per startup, but startups are extreme. The company that did was RCA, and Farnsworth's reward for his efforts was a decade of patent litigation.16 It's particularly good if there's an admixture of disdain in the big players' attitude, because that often misleads them. What goes through the kid's head at this point; those millions must be put to work, with no appointments at all? It's hard to guess what the eventual equity round valuation might be.17

Notes

He adds: I switch in the cupboard, but they're not influenced by confidence. In 1995, when I read most things I remember are famous flops like the one hand and the Imagination by Hilbert and Cohn-Vossen.

Learning for Text Categorization. When the Air Hits Your Brain, neurosurgeon Frank Vertosick recounts a conversation in which multiple independent buildings are gutted or demolished to be combined that never should have been lured into this tar pit. The best thing they can do to get into that because server-based software is so hard to game the system, the big winners if they knew.

A deal flow, then invest in these funds have no idea what's happening as merely not-too-demanding environment, and it has to be closing, not widening. They also generally say they bear no blame for opinions expressed in it.

A single point of a reactor: the separate condenser.

You can have a definite plan to make a lot of the twentieth century. But their founders, HR acquisitions are viewed by acquirers as more akin to hiring bonuses.

Why does society foul you? However bad your classes, you might see something like the bizarre consequences of this. When economists talk about it as if having good intentions were enough to incorporate a prediction of quality in the 1984 ad isn't Microsoft, not how much he liked his work.

Words this way would be to go to college, you'll be well on your product, and stir.

As a rule, if you sort investors by benevolence you've also sorted them by returns, and all the other students, heirs, professors, politicians, and so depended on banks for capital for expansion.

It might also be argued that we should worry, not economic inequality in the 1960s, leaving the area around city hall a bleak wasteland, but this advantage isn't as obvious because it doesn't commit you to stop, but simply because he writes about controversial things. Top VC firms. I explain later. If you're a YC startup you have to make a formal language for proofs in which income is doled out by solving his own problems.

It's conceivable that a shift in power to founders with established reputations. The moment I do, and that he be spared.

Max also told me they do. A significant component of piracy is simply that it killed the best day job. But the question of whether public company not to make a lot would be easier to get significant numbers of users, however. Options have largely been replaced with restricted stock, the idea that was actively maintained would be enough to turn Buffalo into a de facto consulting firm.

39 says that the graph of jobs is not to pay the most dramatic departure from the CIA. I'm thinking of Oresme c.

Even if you turn out to be extra skeptical about Viaweb too. It's lame that VCs miss.

Nat. Miyazaki, Ichisada Conrad Schirokauer trans.

Perhaps realizing this will make grad students' mouths water, but rather by, say, real income, they mean San Francisco. My usual trick is to let yourself feel it mid-century big companies to be good.

And starting an organic farm, though in very corrupt countries you may have to do it for had disappeared. Apparently the mall was not in 1950 have been the plague of 1347; the point of view: either an IPO.

Learning for Text Categorization. Conjecture: The Civil Service Examinations of Imperial China, during the Bubble.

[bluewatsons]

Sabra Embury, Are We Too Quick to Call Everyday Assholes Narcissists?, Vice (August 17, 2016)

Vice: It seems the label "narcissist" is more ubiquitous than ever, used to describe every power-hungry egomaniac.

Kristin Dombek: My hunch is that the popularity of the word, as an insult, or a citizen diagnosis, these days, is partly about a fear of the internet itself, where it spreads. About how we have to deal with so many people so quickly, without being able to test who they are behind the images and words they put online. More generally, the commonness of the term these days is an example of the dominance of psychological language in our everyday ways of relating to others and thinking about ethical problems. It worries me that we've come to use psychological diagnosis in a very unexamined way in everyday conversation, as if it's scripture, as if its categories are clear and true, and we can just fit people into them. Historically, that kind of language has often had an agenda, under the surface.

Vice: For those who are unfamiliar, what's the difference between a narcissist and a sociopath?

Kristin Dombek: People must ask the internet this all the time—"Is my boyfriend a sociopath or a narcissist?"—judging by the number of posts on this topic on relationship self-help sites. Neither a narcissist nor a sociopath can give real love, people tend to agree about that. But while both are just tricking you and using you, or so the story goes, narcissists are more focused on getting affection and attention they need to maintain a grandiose, vain self-image, while sociopaths don't even give a shit; they're just trying to get power and win. The narcissist might drop you and then keep coming back to try to persuade you that he's actually cool and perfect, and that it's you who is the problem; the sociopath might just take off when she's done. The studies that claim to show narcissism is actually increasing are not convincing to me, so I got interested in the question of why narcissism [has become] one of our most common fears about other people. Fear of narcissism is a little different than fear of sociopathy or psychopathy; it's about fakeness, and performance, about the possibility that someone can seem to have a warm, charming surface, but under the surface, total absence of empathy, total emptiness.

Vice: And that emptiness is definitely more nurture than nature, right?

Kristin Dombek: There's a total lack of consensus in the psychology literature I've read. But dating self-help sites tend to present it as a natural thing, like an essential category--Some people just don't have empathy. You can feel better about your ex-boyfriend because he's essentially a narcissist, he's not capable of love, he'll never change . It's not that he chose not to feel empathy for you, he's not capable of empathy at all. You were fooled . The commonness of this story makes me suspicious.

Vice: Just as there's a spectrum of autism, do you think there's a spectrum of narcissistic personality disorder? Or do you see it working in stages--early inward versus full-blown zero-empathy monster?

Kristin Dombek: These are huge questions. If you look across the subfields of psychology, there's a good deal of disagreement about whether narcissism is a thing we are or a thing we do, if it's better defined as a clinical condition or a spectrum, a thing in the brain or a thing at all, a permanent and untreatable lack of empathy or a condition that can be healed. The lack of consensus is so great that the American Psychiatric Association came close to removing "narcissistic personality disorder" from the last edition of Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders . And yet there are hundreds of websites about toxic and fraudulent romance that dispense advice about "narcissists" as if the term is clear-cut. I've read enough to become a committed agnostic. When the word comes up in my head, it feels more useful and accurate to think of it as a thing we do—as a thing I do, and have to work against doing, and a thing others do, and I have to work to understand them. In other words, since the word is there, shouting at me, when I do something shitty or cold, or someone else disappears, I'm trying to make it more flexible.

Vice: In the debate of who did what wrong, I guess it's all pretty relative.

Kristin Dombek: There are assholes, of course. But yes—my hunch is that I'm fascinated by the way these diagnostic terms shape our stories about romance, gender, sexuality, generations—our feelings about the culture and condemnations of whole groups, like millennials. And worried by the way the word "narcissism" helps us fetishize our own empathy, as if "we" always have it and "they" don't.

Vice: You say that Freud argued that narcissism, at its base, stems from an instinct of self-preservation, especially when dealing with cold, cruel, or violent parents. Is this at all related to the type of narcissists who are constantly posting selfies?

Kristin Dombek: The social psychologists who warn of a narcissism epidemic today, citing selfie-posting and so on, actually believe that the thing they're calling "narcissism" comes from too much parental attention and coddling; they think narcissists have too high self-esteem—which is the opposite of what Freud thought. Are they talking about the same thing, even? I'm not sure. But no, we'd better hope that all people who post selfies are not necessarily people with personality disorders. Selfies are shared and shared for the sake of contact. I've noticed that some of my most wildly generous, empathetic friends post the most selfies. Why is this? It seems too simple to claim that anything that is expressed through self-representation is necessarily self-absorbed or vain. Sometimes selfies are posted for vain reasons, sometimes for no good reason, and sometimes for important, generous, even revolutionary reasons.

Vice: Speaking of revolutionary self-representation, you briefly mentioned novelist Karl Ove Knausgaard and the success of his memoirs being treated, by some, as a symptom of all this.

Kristin Dombek: What Knausgaard has done is mysterious, isn't it? Knausgaard has been called narcissistic, and many have cited the popularity of the memoir genre as a sign of a cultural shift toward narcissism. But this doesn't make sense to me. For every one person who writes a memoir, there are multiple people who read it, right? In the case of Jeannette Walls or Cheryl Strayed, a gazillion people. So even if Jeanette Walls or Cheryl Strayed were narcissists for writing about their lives (and there's just no way they are, or their books would be boring and non-revelatory and people would not love them as they do), then what about all the people who are reading their memoirs? It's hard to imagine cold, non-empathetic, entirely self-absorbed people caring enough to read hundreds of pages about someone else's life. My point is that maybe it's not the "I" that's the problem; maybe the "I", as a mode of expression, in image or writing, or music, for that matter, can be humble or tyrannical, generous or attention-seeking, conservative or revolutionary, and so on.

Vice: Is there a common "tell" you've noticed among people with full blown NPD? From all your research, have you noticed an ability to meet people and see characteristics of NPD emerge sooner than later?

Kristin Dombek: There are many posts suggesting "tells," ways to test people and diagnose right away. I'm more trying to learn how not to do this. Diagnosis can protect you from being exploited. Also, it's fun, sometimes, to talk about with friends. Maybe I'm a spoilsport by worrying over it. But there's a structural similarity with every kind of bigotry, everything that causes the horrors we see in the world--to put people in a category first and then decide how to treat them. I think most professional psychologists would agree we should be more cautious. The APA, this week, published a message to its members not to be tempted to diagnose certain political figures from afar; there's a standard that's been in place since 1972, the Goldwater Rule, that forbids diagnosing people you have not examined yourself.

Vice: Do you believe a symbiotic relationship between empaths and narcissists exists? That the empaths are "consumed" and emptied so that they too eventually become narcissists themselves, like some vampire apocalypse?

Kristin Dombek: That's a story that's told, again and again, online. And it's a compelling one—it must be. The thing is, everyone ends up, at one point or another, thinking that their partner is the narcissist, and they are the empathetic one, right? There are all these moments over the course of an ordinary relationship when your partner (or parent or boss) can look evil, and when you do, to them, too. In the book, I'm trying to tease apart that vulnerable moment when we fear the other's selfishness, and the way our habit of diagnosis overdetermines the moment, encourages us to label things as mental illness when we might be better off sitting in the difficulty without deciding what it is. What happens if we let the psychological language go, and the moral language, without labeling it "selfishness" or "vanity" or, especially, "pathology"? What if, in other words, we're able to let their actions not necessarily be about us? I think there's a lot of sweetness in the moment just after that, sometimes, when we accepted one another's temporary self-absorptions, and them, ours.

Vice: The age-old wisdom that says don't take things too personally.

Kristin Dombek: That's the joke that fearing narcissism always plays on you—when you start calling others assholes, you're giving up on them, and then you're one, too. You're interpreting the actions of others only as they affect you. So while that story about the vampire apocalypse can be true of some relationships, its popularity tells a deeper story about being human, maybe the deepest one. When others look more selfish than we do, that's often the moment when we're most stuck in our own position, mistaking it for the center of the universe.

[theclaravoyant]

also okay - if you're ever wanting to write more in the trans!fitz universe, i'd absolutely love to see a fic where someone on the team learns what 'nonbinary' is and decides they might be nb, and come talk to fitz about it! :) and maybe talk about fitz's experiences being trans and his view of gender and stuff like that

AN ~ awesome prompt! It was a lot of fun exploring nonbinary-ness and different experiences of gender (which is probably why this almost hit 2K!). 

Disclaimer: I’m a cis woman, but I based what Fitz talks about on experiences of several trans and non binary people (from these sources as well as past research, friends, tumblr posts, etc.). I hope I have done the topic some justice!

For those not familiar with my trans!fitz universe, this fic takes place in the Bridget!verse where Fitz transitioned (FTM) from a young age. He is out only to a few select people as trans, and prefers it that way, although this fic also allows for him to be more out re: his sexuality (which is not specified in this fic, but implied to be non-straight).

As for who he’s talking to… I know they’re not part of “the team” exactly but I couldn’t resist using this opportunity to write about everyone’s favourite nb lesbian, Agent Piper!

Anyway, without further ado-

Read on AO3 (~2000wd)

Piper

Pride season was an opportunity for a splash of colour in the increasingly gloomy lives of Shield’s now-underground team. The younger Agents especially filled the base with life and vibrancy while the older ones, for whom Pride was much if not more a commemoration than a festivity, provided strength and fortitude, serving as living reminders of a whole range of struggles that could affect an Agent, and a whole range of ways of being a survivor. Pride was a light in the darkness not unlike the end of year holiday season, if directed at a smaller cohort.

Tonight, many of the Agents were preparing to drive out to a Pride Parade in a nearby city, and were donning all manner of bright colours and some of them even preparing spectacular outfits for a night on the town. Daisy had on a hot-pink sundress with platform sandals and chunky jewellery in blue, purple and silver. Jemma went for a look that somehow managed to be more subdued, in a bright canary-yellow t-shirt and black jeans, with a pink bandana tied around her neck. Fitz was stuck in his room trying to figure out what to wear that was different, but that didn’t scream a Pride flag vomited all over me, when he heard a knock at the door.

“Oh, thank God,” he sighed. “Jemma, I-“

Fitz cut himself off when he pulled the door open and saw not Jemma, but the shorter, stockier, also somewhat-bewildered-looking Agent Piper waiting for him. She was still wearing fatigues, not yet prepared for the evening’s outing, and her expression was a little too serious for Fitz’s liking.

“Um. Hi,” Fitz greeted after a moment. “Can I help you? Is something going on?”

He stuck his head further into the hallway, but Piper shook her head before he could work himself into too much of a panic.

“Nothing, it’s all good out here, I was actually wondering if I could – maybe – have a private conversation with you.”

“Okay. Sure.” Still a little unsettled, Fitz invited Piper into his and Jemma’s room. He waved a hand apologetically at the suit-jackets, feather boa, dresses, heels, and button-ups that had sprawled across the room during their preparations, but Piper seemed content to ignore them even as her eyes cast about the room a little, not quite sure how to broach the subject she’d come here to speak about.

“Sorry,” she said eventually, bringing her eyes back to Fitz as she seemed to remember she was prying in a private space. “It’s just, I know you’re not really out with it and I didn’t want to be creepy. I wanted to talk about… gender. I’ve been thinking about some stuff and Jemma sort of mentioned that you might be someone who knows something about it. If you’re not comfortable with talking to me you can send me on my way and I won’t breathe a word of it – I know how it is – but it’d be really cool if you could help me out, man.”

Fitz shrugged. “It’s alright.”

“You sure?”

“Sure.” He smiled. “Happy to help out if I can.”

“Awesome.” Piper sighed, and a lot of the tension left her body. For want of a better place to plant herself, she perched on the corner of a desk.

Fitz sat nearby, in a clear space at the edge of the bed, and waited for Piper to gather her thoughts. He hoped she wouldn’t ask too much about him. Then again, he hoped she would. If it would help. If it would maybe mean he was sharing something of himself with someone who might get it in a way that the others didn’t. He wondered what she would ask. What was questioning even like? What was it like not to wake up and know? Of course, he’d been through his own questioning period, but most of that had been forced upon him, particularly by his father’s efforts to reshape him. Inside Piper’s head, Fitz knew, there could be a whole different set of sensations going on. Legitimate questions. Questions in which politics and oppression only played a part. Questions that could be daunting, and probably moreso to a thirty-year-old mind than to a seven-year-old, who didn’t yet understand so much about the weight of the world.

“Want me to start?” Fitz offered. Piper groaned.

“God, please.”

“Do you think you’re a man?”

Piper recoiled from the suggestion, but quickly recovered.

“Sorry. But no. I don’t think so – it feels wrong. It’s just that… I’m not really sure I’m a woman either. Does that make sense? Is that possible? I mean, I’ve always been a bit of a tomboy but like… recently, it feels different somehow. It’s difficult to describe. Maybe I’m just being weird, but to be honest, it’s kind of freaking me out. I thought I’d already done the whole identity-crisis thing, you know?”

Fitz laughed a little. He could relate.

“There’s no need for a crisis. You’ll figure it out eventually. And believe me, I get the double-take. Identity is an ever-changing beast.”

“How was it for you, though?” Piper wondered. “The gender thing I mean. How did you know?”

“I don’t think I can really help you with that one, unfortunately. I’m one of those people who just always, sort of, knew. I’ve known since I was a kid. I don’t really know why. Some of it was the obvious I guess. I played with model trains and cars instead of dolls. I hated wearing dresses. Tried to cut off all my hair with scissors. I wanted a pee-pee.” He snorted. “Seven-year-old me didn’t really get into the philosophy of it all, but there must be something to it, because… well, let’s just say I went through some things that would have chased it out of me if that were possible.”

Piper nodded solemnly.

“Not all the confusion is bad though,” Fitz continued. “My mum raised me, mostly, and she did it without a lot of that masculine bravado bullshit. She taught me to be gentle, sensitive, forgiving… sometimes it felt like I was less of a guy because of that kind of stuff, and the teasing didn’t help, but in the end it gave me faith in my identity. Mum always told me there should be more guys like me. That it shouldn’t be left to the girls to be the soft ones.“

“I like your mom,” Piper put in.

“Me too.” Fitz smiled. “And honestly I think having someone who believed in me like that made it all so much easier, even though she didn’t get it entirely. She started calling me by the right pronouns – you know, he and him and all that - and even gave me a different name. Helped me transition in lots of other ways, too. I couldn’t have done it without her.”

“Oh, I don’t want to transition, either,” Piper clarified. “I’m happy with my body just the way it is. Is that – I mean, does that mean anything?”

“Not really,” Fitz explained. “I mean, for me it did. I had… I had dysphoria in a big way. Phantom body parts. Huge discomfort about my dead name and pronouns. Not every trans person gets that. Some have it the other way, actually. Euphoria, it’s called. They just feel more happy when they express as their gender, or when they’re referred to by some other name or pronouns or, you know, gendered words, even if they’re not particularly unhappy with their assigned ones.”

“See, that sounds more like me,” Piper agreed. “But can you be, like, gender-neutral trans? Or is that a different thing, I don’t know. But can you?”

“You mean like nonbinary?” Fitz suggested. “Some people think of it as trans and some don’t, but yeah, sure. It’s a thing.”

“It means you’re like, somewhere between a boy and a girl, right?” Piper speculated. “Like on the spectrum.”

“Basically,” Fitz agreed. “I mean, for some people it’s more complicated than that, and just like with sexual orientation there’s a whole bunch of subsets. Some people like the spectrum, some people go with a third non-spectrum gender, some people even prefer no gender at all. It’s up to you. I can’t really tell you which one to pick, unfortunately – I mean as far as I’m aware, we as a scientific community still don’t know what gender even is yet – but if you’re feeling like nonbinary’s an option for you, try it out. There’s no harm in a label if you’re safe and happy with it. And even if it doesn’t work out, it’s not like you’re getting in anyone’s way.”

“Really?” Piper checked. “You think I should go for it?”

Fitz held his hands up, palms out. “You don’t need my permission.”

“Can I keep my name?”

“Sure, if you’re happy with it.”

“What about that pronoun stuff?”

“Well, if it bothers you when people call you she/her, tell them so. If not, you can keep them and still be non-binary. It depends on you. If you’re looking for a more neutral pronoun, ‘they’ is getting pretty popular, relatively. There are some more obscure ones around, so Google it maybe, but if it’s not a strong point of contention for you, or none of the others really speak to you, you could try they/theirs.”

“You’re right, that does sound better,” Piper agreed, a smile breaking out across her face at last. “Thanks so much, Fitz, honestly. I feel like I’ve lined up so many things in my brain right now.”

“My pleasure.” Fitz found himself beaming too, unexpectedly broadly. He kicked his legs in glee. “Glad I could help.”

“Wait.” Piper interrupted, her tone heavier again all of a sudden and, if Fitz was not mistaken, tainted with dread. “Can I still be a lesbian, then?”

Fitz’s excitement faded a little too. With the weight Piper put on it, he could tell, this part of her identity was important to her. Painstakingly so. Handling it with care was essential, and yet, he had to walk blindly into it and do the best he could.

“Well, I don’t know,” he offered truthfully. “If someone else, if another lesbian, came to you with something like this, what would you say, d’you think?”

Piper’s eyes searched the floor, the carpet, the nose of Fitz’s dress shoes poking out from under one of Jemma’s discarded dresses. She took a deep breath.

“Well, I’m sure as hell not a man. And even if I’m not a woman exactly, I still feel pretty close to it. I’d like to think I’m enough of a woman to be a lesbian still.”

“Then there you have it, I guess. Maybe talk to the girls, they might have more to say about it, but I think that’s fair enough.”

“Cool.” Piper nodded once, and then twice more for good measure as she let it all settle in. Her eyes trailed the mess that was FitzSimmons’ room and, as the mess in her own head cleared away, she remembered why it was all there.

“Shit, we’d better get ready, hey?” she reminded Fitz. He escorted her to the door, as best he could through the widespread pig-sty.

“Again, thanks so much for the talk,” Piper continued. “It was really great. Really helpful. If you don’t mind though, can we keep it on the DL for now? Sprinkle a couple ‘they’s here and there if you could, but the other stuff, I’m still easing into it.”

“No worries,” Fitz promised. “And you know, my stuff –“

“Lock and key,” Piper promised in return. “See you tonight.”

“See you there.”