#this is not like super coherent. but do you get me here. do you understand.

[schmidtsbimbo]

if you’d like to you should def do a ethan x reader where the reader has a super shitty boyfriend and is enemies with ethan, making fun of him nd stuff like that

so what if to get back at the boyfriend, ethan fucks the reader and in like the middle of it ethan whips out his phone/her phone and calls the readers boyfriend, making him listen to her whimper/whine ethan’s name 😛😛

★Jealous Boy - Ethan Landry ★

𖦹Warnings: MDNI 18+, afab reader, unprotected piv, cunnilingus, cheating, pet names, hair pulling, fingering, slight dumbification if you squint

⋆｡°‧Requests are open! Comments and reblogs are welcome and appreciated ♡

―୨୧⋆ ˚A/N: i love you for this idea anon, i kinda hate everything about this especially the ending, hope this still turned out okay! , made this so much longer than I originally planned or wanted to, pls let me know if i missed any warnings!

Word count: 1.9k

This has not been proofread^_^

Just hours ago you were arguing with your boyfriend at a stupid frat party you never wanted to go to in the first place.

Now you’re standing here in your kitchen, breath hitched in your throat as you stare at the man above you.

Pinned between his body and the dining table, his arms completely closing you in.

You look down, eyes landing on your phone that’s in his hand as watch message from your boyfriend coming in.

You hear a short and dry laugh come from the man above you as you move your eyes between him and the phone.

“Look at what a fucking loser you’re with y/n” Ethan says as he moves his arm, turning the phone towards you so you can read the messages.

You stare at the messages before you look up at Ethan, the sight of him smirking above you making you lightheaded and weak in the knees.

You stay quiet for a moment and get a split second of clarity as you look away from him.

“We shouldn’t be doing this Ethan” You say, voice full of doubt as you look back up at him.

You feel a shiver go down your spine as he inches closer to your face, his lips brushing past your cheek as they hover over your ear.

“I still don’t understand why you chose him when I’ve been right here” he whispers, lightly nipping at your ear and sending goosebumps down your entire body.

You stand there completely frozen, trying to form a single coherent thought as your chest is rising and falling trying to control your breathing before you feel his lips smashing against your own.

You let out a small shriek at the sudden impact but quickly sink further into it, making Ethan smirk into the kiss as he places his large hands onto your waist, pulling your lower body towards his.

He breaks the kiss and trails kisses down your neck as you part your lips at the sensation.

“Jump” he simply mumbles against your skin before he brings his lips back to yours.

You instinctively jump into his arms and let him lift you up, placing you on the table and never breaking the kiss as you spread your legs, letting himself position himself right between them.

He starts to trial soft and sloppy kisses down your neck, his hands running down your body as they reach the top of your jeans, tugging on them lightly as you eagerly lift your bottom off table with your hands, making it easier for him to slide the jeans down your legs till they’re discarded somewhere behind him.

Ethan’s lips make their way back up to yours, completely engulfing them like a starved man as his hands find their way to your chest, his thumbs rubbing small circles against the peak of your breasts, earning a small whine from you as your hands make their way up his shoulders and wrapping around his neck.

He breaks from the kiss and drops to his knees, grabbing your legs with his hands and pulling you closer to the edge of the table, your clothed heart right in front of his face as he lets out a groan.

“Just as pretty as I imagined” he says looking up at your face as he brings his hand up to your core, rubbing small circles onto the bundle of nerves under your soaked panties, making you throw your head back and hold back at the sensation.

His words send jolts of electricity and need straight to your core as you bite your lip, trying to refrain from letting out a whiny gasp.

He smirks at your reaction and starts planting slow and soft kisses up your thigh, almost torturing you with how slow and delicate he was being before he finally reaches your core, moving his hands from your thighs to the top of your underwear, ripping the fabric from your body with his bare hands and instantly diving his head between your thighs.

Giving you almost no time to react as he licks a flat stripe up and down your folds as you let out a gasp and throw your head back, your reaction making him smirk as he wraps his lips against your clit.

“Look at me” he mumbles against it, roughly sucking on your clit as he hooks his arms around your thighs to keep you in place.

You let out a whiny moan at the harshness against your clit and bring your head back up to look down at him, your hand reaching down to his curls and gripping them as you watched him eat you out like you were the most divine thing he’s ever tasted.

You tug on his hair again, making him groan against your clit, the vibration of it making your brain foggy as the feeling of desire in you continues to grow.

“Ethan” you moan out as you involuntarily buck your hips up, earning another groan from Ethan as he tightens the grip on your thighs, the thought of his fingers leaving bruises on your thighs threatening to send you over the edge.

You try to hold it together as you try to form a single sentence, not being able to let out a single word but a pathetic whine, “Ethan, please”

At this he pulls away for a moment, your sleek making his lips shine as he looks up at you expectantly.

“Please what, baby?” He says as he leans back in between your thighs, planting a soft kiss directly on your clit that makes you buck your hips again, a small moan escaping from your lips, earning a chuckle from him as he pulls away again and looks back up at you.

“Use your words, princess” he whispers as he loosens his grip on your thighs, his lips hovering above the skin of your thighs as he waits for you to respond.

You let out a whiny moan at his teasing and bite your lip, not being able to form any words from how dizzy the sight of him on his knees with his head in between your thighs makes you.

He immediately stands up as the sounds leave your lips, engulfing them in a kiss as one of his hands wrap around your waist, your hands traveling towards his shirt and tugging on the hem of it as you hear the sound of his zipper coming undone and his pants dropping to the floor.

He breaks the kiss for a second to quickly remove his shirt and you follow right behind him, adding your shirt to the growing pile of clothes on the floor.

He dives straight to your neck as he starts leaving marks and bruises all along your collarbones, his hand reaching down to your aching heat as he dips his fingers in between your folds, earning a quiet moan from your parted lips.

Within seconds you feel yourself lose control all over again at the feeling of his rough fingers rolling the small bundle of nerves in between his fingers.

You instinctively reach down for his wrist, not wanting to come undone so quickly.

“Ethan, please” you mumble against his lips as you move your hand from his wrist to the edge of his boxers.

“Please just fuck me” you finally moan out as you tug on his boxers, any feeling of embarrassment gone as it’s overpowered by the feeling of desire.

He lets out a groan at your words and breaks the kiss to plant sloppy kisses on your neck as he tugs down his boxers.

“So needy, just begging for more, begging me to fuck you” he says in between kisses as he grabs your hips with his hands, moving his head up so your foreheads are touching as he lines himself up with you.

Giving you almost no warning he slams himself into you, giving you no time to adjust to his size as you let out a gasp, throwing your head back as you feel him stretch you out in the most delicious way possible.

He quickly sets a steady pace, fucking into you fast as his arms hold you flush against his chest, making the table shake with every thrust as he snaps his hips into yours.

He tucks his head against your neck, letting out groans that instantly threaten to throw you over the edge, your own moans being muffled by the skin on his shoulders before he lets go of your body, pushing your back onto the table, never losing his rhythm as his hands hold a strong grip on your hips.

“Such a pretty girl” he says, slowing his pace down a bit, causing you to let out a small whine at the loss of friction his skin made against your clit.

“What would Jacob say if he saw you like this? Begging whining for me to fuck you?” He asks as he keeps his pace slow.

His words send waves of heat straight to your core as you claw at his arms, trying to get a hold of anything to try and control yourself to no avail.

You knew how wrong this was, cheating on your boyfriend with the one guy he told you to stay away from.

You knew how wrong it was and yet you’re crumbling beneath him, wrapping your legs around his hips, keeping a greedy hold on him as he fucks into you.

You watch him reach for something next to your head through your teary eyes, not being able to focus on what he’s holding.

“How about we call him, huh?” He asks as he starts picking up his pace again, making you clench around him as more moans start slipping from your lips again.

He groans at this and drops the phone next to your head again, quickening his pace as you start to unravel beneath him.

You hear the phone ringing and Jacob picking up within seconds, you no longer had any control over the noises you were making as the moans freely fell from your lips, not caring if Jacob or even the neighbors could hear you at this point.

You hear muffled yelling coming from the phone that gets completely tuned out with your moans and Ethan’s breathy grunts, letting out a small gasp as he grabs one of your legs and throws it over his shoulder.

Your eyes widen at the sudden change of angles as his tip brushes right against your sweet spot, making yo feel lightheaded as your climax is approaching fast.

“C’mon, let him know who’s got you this needy and whiny” Ethan says in between grunts and breathy moans, the words spilling from his mouth earning a whimper from you.

He reaches one of his hands up and tangles it in your hair, slightly lifting your head from the table as he grips your hair.

“Hmm? Too fucked out to talk?” He asks as he leans down to whisper in your ear, his words making you clench around him as you feel yourself seconds from climax.

“Ethan, I’m gonna come, please” you whimper out, not even thinking about what you say as the words leave your lips.

The pressure of the new angle and his filthy words sending you over the edge as you arch your back, chanting his name over and over again like a prayer.

His climax follows right behind yours as you start seeing stars from how sensitive you are, squeezing his arms trying to stabilize yourself with anything you can grab as he collapses on top of you with one final thrust, completely filling you up with his warmth.

You slowly start coming to your senses as the high starts to fade, becoming aware of your surroundings as the muffled yelling coming from the phone starts playing in your ears again.

Ethan gently lifts himself off of you and pulls out slowly, causing a small whine to fall from your lips at the loss of contact.

You watch him as he grabs the phone from the table and puts it up to his ear, a smirk playing on his lips as he lets out a chuckle before throwing the phone back onto the table.

He leans down and pulls your bruised and swollen lips into a kiss, breaking away from it as he puts his hand on the back of your head, placing your foreheads together.

“You don’t know how long I’ve waited for this.”

[mrs-gauche]

So, I *think* I've calmed down enough to form coherent sentences about this trailer now, after watching this about a gazillion times. 😂 There is just SO much in this and I still can't believe it's all real.. I feel like people have already dissected every single frame anyway, so here are just my poor two cents (that's a lie, it's an essay lol), I'm sure 90% of this has probably already been said lol, but I just had to write my thoughts down, so there you go. 🫠

But first, can I just ask you guys this.. Does anyone else feel SO friggin overwhelmed every time something huge like this drops? 😂😭 Like, I LOVE the collective excitement and freaking out over all this with the fandom together in real time, and maybe it's because I'm not a native English speaker, but I'm watching the trailer live and within like fifteen minutes there are already a bazillion notifications, messages, people have already made hundreds of theory posts, edits, fanart and shitposts, meanwhile I'm sitting here still looking at the FIRST FRAME and trying to process what I'm even looking at. lmaoo Like, it takes me SO long to take it fully in, calm down and look at ALL of it in detail, while I go radio silent for like two hours, making people think I just died watching the trailer, I guess. lmaooo So.. sorry if it takes me forever until I even go on here and look at everything you guys are posting. 💀 <3

Anyway, so first of all, I'd like to just generally say... Everything about this blew. me. away.

Look. After like 20 years of watching BioWare's entire animation catalogue of the same 25 movements in every cutscene, that it would make you jump every time a character but even slightly moved differently than everyone else, we're now getting a game that is SO INCREDIBLY CINEMATIC, SO SMOOTH, unlike any BioWare game before. A game where everyone just moves and expresses emotions like their own person, making everything a hundred times more immersive and impactful!!

Not only that but there's a BioWare game now with PHENOMENAL LOOKING HAIR and REALISTIC HAIR PHYSICS. Guys, do you understand this is HISTORY??? lmao We've been asking for this for YEARS and it's happening!! 😭

And the cinematography? THE CINEMATOGRAPHY?? Just looking at that very FIRST LOCATION SHOT alone. The camerawork, the composition, the fluidity of movement, the shift of focus, the lighting, the use of MoCap, the facial expressions... As someone who spent a *LOT* of time using the flycam to make cinematic gifsets of DAI, where - with all respect to the devs - 90% of the camerawork basically consisted of "zoom in/zoom out"... this. blew. my. fucking mind.

Like, they did it. They mastered the Frostbite engine on all fronts. And it truly hurts my heart seeing people compare this to Fortnite or whatever, when in my opinion this time they actually managed to find a perfect mix between stylized and realism, in favor of making the characters even more expressive and this coupled with the use of MoCap and the incredible cinematography will make these emotional scenes hit SO hard and.. ugh, I just love it so much. 🥹❤️❤️

With this being said, let's dive into it!

Okay, so I know this is super random, but it was literally the first thing I noticed about this trailer. lol Did you noticed that it said "BioWare" *before* "Electronic Arts" in the beginning, unlike that first... controversial reveal trailer, where it was the other way around? 😂 Not reading anything into this of course (or do I? lol), but.. Idk, I thought it was.. interesting. 👀

So we start off with the first of many amazing tracking shots, with the camera orbiting around Rook in this place devoid of color or life. The note at the bottom made me chuckle "Game engine footage with some costum camera angles", I was like "Oh, so they used the flycam to make this?". lol So some shots of these will look different in the final version (what kind of spoilers are they hiding?? 👀👀).

I do hope that next shot DOES end up in the game though, because holy SHIT, that FIRST wide shot already blew. me. away.

Look at the COMPOSITION of this.

Actually, you could probably take every single location/wide shot of this trailer and hang it on your wall. lol But seriously, the way this place just looks... dead. It makes me think of "void" rather than Fade.. like an ancient graveyard. The raw Fade looks generally creepy, but this is haunting even for that. There's no life, no color, no motion. It's all broken and crumbled. Almost like it reflects Solas' feelings. People are speculating if this place might change depending on Solas' state of mind.. This is the Fade after all, but Solas is here physically and this being the place that was supposed to be the new prison for the gods.. It's probably different from the rest of it.

We also see all seven statues of the pantheon from the ritual site again. Solas "I have the high ground", *literally* talking down to Rook, while standing on two separate cliffs (how did Rook even get there, I wonder? lol), like there is quite literally a rift between them (for now..!) and Solas is keeping a distance, as always. We still don't know how that connection between the two even works, I assume Rook can only contact him while asleep? But to think that this is the place where he is trapped now, where he is even more isolated than ever before, is making me so emotional. ;-;

I love how it's just black and white though. It gives the scene a destinct atmosphere that might be important, if this is where we get to see Solas doing a lot of introspection. In the art of filmmaking, the absence of color is often used to force the audience to focus on the contrast, textures, and tones present in the image, which can evoke a deep sense of emotion.

And speaking of emotions...

"You have no idea what you have done."

We had already heard that line before, but something about that booming, echoing effect they used on his voice sent a shiver down my spine!

"The blighted elven gods walk free. And all because you disrupted my ritual."

To me, he *sounds* much more frustrated here than he *looks* when saying that. lol He looks incredibly worried though, and just so tired. A moment ago, he was SO close to achieving his goal after hundreds of years of preparation and then he failed again... and now there is this completely clueless stranger who got him in this situation, but who he has to rely on now to stop these gods, when he's unable to trust anyone, and yet he can't even yell at them too much, because he *needs* them. He must be so exhausted.

And yes, it is kinda funny how they put "elven gods" in quotation marks. lol

Thank god he still has his freckles though. ❤️ We're actually seeing a lot more texture on his face here than in the gameplay showcase. And yes, not only did he get his eyebrows microbladed but apparently he's also sporting eyeliner and lipstick now. 😌✨✨ The only downside to the lack of colors here is that his super purple eyes are not poppin' anymore. lol

"You battle against gods. They will not rest until you are on your knees. Fearful. Cowering. Helpless in the face of such power."

I love how they play this line so early on in the trailer, that it makes you go "WAIT... IS THAT- NO WAY" and not until the end do we get the confirmation with the most amazing entrance ever.

We then get a shot of what I think has to be Treviso in flames and Ghilan'nain symbolically coiling her tentacles around a crow statue's head, as she's probably about to take over the city. 👀 *falls on my knees the second I meet her in the game* lol

Then there's the shot of this horrifying Blight.. lump.. growth thing that has completely devoured an elf (and several other bodies it seems) with a hair style that has everyone wondering if this could be Felassan! 🥺🥺🥺 As much as I would LOVE for Felassan to make an appearance.. I kinda hope this *isn't* him.. because good god, whatever happened to this persom here must be pretty traumatizing (are they even still alive?) and also, how do we get them out of there? lol Either way, seeing as there are Harding, Bellara and Neve accompanying Rook here, this might be earlier in the game (and this is them dicovering that the Blight is already spreading rapidly?) and yet it already shows us that this Blight is on a whole other level than anything we've seen before, and it's taking every living thing.

Then we see another snowy place (or might this be within the same area?) that's also in huge parts taken over by the Blight. You can also see a dead(?) dragon lying on the ground at the bottom right corner? 🥺

Then Elgar'nan literally pops up right next to Ghilan'nain, and btw, I love how I can't even tell where her body begins or where it ends in this shot. lmao What ARE you, Ghili?? 💀

It looks to me like maybe she was struck by a bolt/spear from a ballista or something? The Grey Wardens tried to take her out maybe? Looks like the power of Elgar'nan's mere presence blows the Wardens away then lol, like they're just insects to him.. and in the blast we can see a person that looks like Evka?? <3333 (please don't die here though 😭)

Then we're getting a first glimpse of a dragon that shows up multiple times in this trailer. Also, to me, it looks so much like the dragon from the Golden City vinyl cover, which has me like 👀👀👀👀

Next there are a few scenes from the prologue we've already seen in the gameplay showcase, but it's coupled with new lines from Varric, that have me super worried. :(

"Rook, you've got this. I've seen your work. You're clever, adaptable. And you don't know when to quit.

My first reaction to this was "Oh god no, that sounds so much like a "passing the torch" kind of dialogue to me" as in Varric either dies (PLEASE NO but it IS super suspicious how he's not seen or mentioned in any other scene so far) or retires his role as the leader of this group and hands it over to Rook. And he just sounds... weary. 🥺 I wonder what he means by "your work" though? Is he talking about things Rook has done before Varric recruited them? Or is it maybe later down the line, after Rook has already proven themselves to be a great leader? 🤔

Then we get another shot of that one dragon and our first look at Harding with the bruised face (whoever did this, come fight me!) and some poor person tangled in.. something, I'm not sure. lol

Then there's a super quick shot of the floating building in Minrathous, followed by Rook opening a gate Aragorn style, which leads me to believe that this is actually somethere IN that floating building maybe?

But the fact that Rook and everyone else seems to be wearing casual clothes in the following shots, plus the architecture in the background has me wondering if they might be at the Lighthouse actually? 👀

Especially because in the very next shot we see Rook, Bellara, Neve and Harding all in casual clothes again in front of a giant eluvian and I wonder if that's the mirror that we've read about in the Game Informer article. The special eluvian at the Lighthouse that can take you anywhere? :o

Speaking of the Game Informer article, it also told us that Rook, Harding and Neve went back to the ritual site after what happened in the beginning, which is probably what we're seeing here!

"You want allies to go after the elven gods. I've got places to look."

Well, good thing we have a clever detective on the team that apparently knows people who would willingly fight some gods. lol Notice how Harding's face is still injured in this scene. 👀 So I assume whatever happened to her must've happened at the ritual site? Btw, I love how the trailer makes it look like they're all in casual clothes and the second they're stepping through the eluvian, they're in full gear? 😂 (I'm sure those two scenes take place at different times though.) It's crazy how much different the Arlathan Forest looks now, without the cataclysmic storm and all. I love the lighting, the colors and the soft rain! :3

Then we get another gorgeous location shot to hang on the wall. <3 My guess here is definitely Anderfels, given the landscape and those "pillar ring" things we've seen before (I still have no idea what those are, the funniest guess is still griffon training flight path 😂 But something tells me those things will be important.).

"I'll be damned! A griffon!"

Davrin and Assan!! <33333 And the dialogue makes it sound like this might be the first time they meet each other?? 🥹🥹 Followed by a scene of Davrin taking care of business and what might be the return of children in DA?? 😭 Seeing that little girl made me so happy, because that was actually one of the few things on my wishlist for DA4, because I always felt like children make the world feel SO much more real and immersive and besides Kieran, children were completely absent in DAI.

Am I trippin or does it look like this child is smiling here, while running away from a horde of darkspawn?? 😶 Kids in the Anderfels are build different, I guess. lol

"In war, victory."

CHILLS!!

Then we see Assan again, who is pinning down a.. thing I can't identify. lol I'm very curious about all those cages in the background though.. 🤔

We then get one of the shots that made me freak out the most, because it's a flippin *underwater* shot of elven ruins??? 😱😱

We know it's elven because if you look very very closely, you can see a Halla statue in the distance, to the left side. I'm immediately reminded of the stories about Arlathan having sunken to the ocean floor! There's also still all that mention of Ghilan'nain's grey "goop" that smells like the ocean and another shot later on of a dragon (Elgar'nan?) emerging from the ocean! 👀👀👀

And aside from all that, it's just such a sick level design!! 😍 What do these ruins look like if you enter them in the game? How do we get there?? There's an eluvian in the middle of the ocean on the newest map that's included in the Collector's Edition! 👀👀 If that one flippin theory of mine actually turns out to be true and there are somehow two parts of Arlathan, one on the ocean floor and another in the center of the Fade/the Black City, I'll do a triple backflip. lmaoo

Then Lucanis jumps in with some incredibly smooth fighting moves against the Venatori... and PURPLE WINGS!! So we were right with our speculation about the reveal trailer! Why does he have them? Is it some connection to a pride demon that revived him? 😂 I don't know, but it looks SO cool!! And after showing off, we hear his first line "I'm ready" with that sweet sweet accent, which is just the cherry on top!! <333

What the heck is up with the sky in this one?? My first thought was the Lighthouse?? 😍😍 Because if you look closely, there are a few wolf head ornaments on the walls? 👀 And this could be in the Crossroads and just like a real Lighthouse, there's a light on the top..? 🥹

Then there's Bellara using some magical device, that looks super similar to the things that were next to the big eluvian in that other scene!

Which makes me think that this might be where we help Bellara find this artifact in order to get the eluvian at the Lighthouse to work properly (since it doesn't seem to work right without Solas, according to the Game Informer article).

"I've never seen this before. There's something kind of exciting about it!"

Not gonna lie, that line and that weird looking device gave me Peebee flashbacks from Andromeda, which I honestly wasn't the biggest fan of. 😂 But Ghil Dirthalen (member of the community council) responded to me a few weeks back on twitter and confirmed that Bellara is nothing like Peebee at all. lol So that's a relief. 😂 I'm really looking forward to learn more about her and every time I see her magical gauntlet, I'm reminded that we're *definitely* not in Ferelden anymore. lol

Anyway, we then get a few shots of the Deep Roads?? Kal-Sharok??? 👀👀 And of course, there's Harding's big reveal of her new magical powers! The animation on this looks sooo amazing!!

Like many suspect, the Titans' awakening might have something to do with this! I totally agree with what Ghil Dirthalen said on twitter recently and, rather than this being Harding having Solas' petrification powers, it's actually Solas who has the powers of the Titans/stone sense/whatever Sandal did to those ogres back then lol. (I need Sandal to return and be her "teacher" or something 🙏❤️) We know of Solas' orb, which was likely created by obtaining the heart of a Titan. And if the Titans are connected to the Forgotten Ones, Fen'Harel was once considered their ally in Dalish legends. 👀

Also, if you look closely, you can see that the moment her powers are triggered, we see the blue glowy effect all over her body, like glowy lyrium veins almost?

And that in turn could hint at something in connection to her blood? So that big injury we see on her (which is still visible in this scene btw!) was maybe the moment her blood came in contact with something that awakened these powers? (We need Valta back to explain! lol)

"What is happening to me?"

That delivery gave me chills again... She is frightened. Ali Hillis is so good. 🥺🥺🥺

Next up is the Grand Necropolis and people have already pointed out that the ceiling we see at that entrance hall or something looks like a GIANT rip cage?? 💀 (What kind of creature would be THIS big???)

First look of Emmrich in-game!!! And he's wearing a fancy new outfit!! And I paused at the perfect moment to catch Rook already falling in love with him, clearly. lmao

There are two characters next to the gate that could be anybody, really. Myrna from Tevinter Nights or Joanna from the short story "The Flame Eternal"? The guy on the right is actually giving me Executor vibes?? 👀👀👀

Then there's Giant Skeleton Monster (Manfred's mom?), and don't even ask me what this could possibly be. 😂 I just hope we don't have to fight THAT (we totally will 💀). I got flashbacks of the Human Reaper endboss in ME2. 😭😭

"Let the Fade draw close!"

There's something kinda... posh about the way he says this? 😂 Like, he's not really intimidated by Giant Skeleton Monster and it's just another Tuesday in the Grand Necropolis and Professor Volkarin is just doing his every day job. lol

Then there are two shots of what I think is somewhere in the Anderfels but snowy again, like that area in the beginning where Elgar'nan and Ghili showed up? And a destroyed watchtower that is occupied by the Wardens. Then we get a *third* and final shot of this beauty again.

"Draw the dragon out into the open. Then attack."

I assume that's Taash?? Sadly, that shot of her drawing her weapon is all we got from her in this trailer, but she looks awesome!! <333 We're gonna be Lord of Fortune buddies, even though we might disagree on the matter of dragon hunting lol (look, I don't want to *fight* dragons, I want to be *friends* with them 🫠😂❤️ I want to see them live their best lifes.. for the most part (I get to the Elgar'nan dragon and the blighted "twin dragons" in a second lol))

We see the docks of Minrathous for a split second and then a first glimpse at a romance scene between Rook and Neve? 👀 At the Lighthouse maybe?

"You and me Rook. Maybe that's what scares me."

What does she mean by that exactly? Does Neve have commitment issues? lol Or is this more like a "We're a dangerous match, Rook. We'll be too powerful of a couple. Like Bonnie and Clyde." kinda statement? 😂

And THEN... Well, then we get probably THE most badass looking introduction/entrance of any character in DA yet. lol And YES, I freaked out SO hard.

SHE'S BACK. Returning like the QUEEN that she is. 🙏 And of course, she has to come down a flight of "stairs" again. lol (And no, Claudia Black did not lie, she just wasn't contacted at the time. 😁) Gosh, that transformation is so SMOOTH. I could watch that forever, it's so darn beautiful. 😍 Again, the way this is done, cinematically.. just *chef's kiss*.

In retrospect, it seems almost like a given that she would be back because.. well, everything about the way DAI ended. lol Flemeth wanted her to inherit her "godhood", and she looks more than ever like her mother now. Remember the designer notes on that last scene in DAI.

Flemeth intends to let Solas have the power, so long as she can pass the essence of her godhood onto Morrigan, a gift Flemeth had always planned for her daughter yet one Morrigan misunderstood as hostile possession.

So, what exactly is she now? Did she receive whatever Flemeth sent through the eluvian at the end of DAI? Does she carry Mythal now?? If so, does Solas know (I NEED a conversation between those two technically "half-siblings", because Flemeth/Mythal is both their "Mother"? 😂)?? Remember when I said that this one dragon that appears multiple times here reminds me a lot of the dragon on the vinyl cover with the Golden City, which is very likely Mythal? So my very first thought was that the dragon is actually Morrigan?? lol Just throwing that out there.

It seems to me that she is with the Dalish/Veil Jumpers in the Arlathan Forest now? (Btw, if you look closely, you can see elven mosaics in COLOR in the background? :O)

"These are the times in which legends are born or slain."

That line goes so HARD aHhhh. Also, speaking of slain, that new outfit is slaying too. <33 Her return also means that the Well decision and potential consequences are back on the table, which will definitely keep me up at night again. 💀

That moment right there. She is everthing. ❤️❤️❤️ I wonder if we're gonna see Kieran again?? 🥺🥺

We then get the most impressive tracking shot and choreography of what I think is Teia and Viago fighting some Venatori?? <333333 Like, seriously, the way the camera is following his movements in this shot without a single cut, makes me think of something like flippin Games of Thrones' Battle of the Bastards. 😱 And those hair physics on Teia as she's swinging around?? Absolutely amazing.

Followed by Lucanis and.. is that Zara Renata (the character with the best name ever lol)?? Fighting over an ominous glowing staff. lol We know these two still had unfinished business with each other after the Wigmaker Job in TN.

Then we get our first in-game look of my man MANFRED (🎉🎉🎉🎉), proving yet again to be the most fashionable character in the whole game, using his pelvis effectively. lol I love him so much.

Then there's another terrifying shot of Giant Skeleton Monster, which almost looks like it's in command over the crowd of people here, like they're possessed or something? Uhg.. As if this thing wasn't scary enough. 💀

"Our gods are back. Our gods! How do we stand up against that?"

Again, CHILLLLS!! Chills all over. It's gonna be so interesting to hear what the Dalish, Bellara or Davrin think about all these revelations!

Then we see the Wardens again, confronting one of the super duper blighted "twin dragons" we see at the end (more on that later).

We see Neve using a barrier or something against a guy who wears the same armor as her, so maybe the Shadow Dragons are corrupted, too?

Then we see Rook dramatically tossing a sword on a table at Weisshaupt? And holy moly, Davrin in that new armor here looks FINE. 😍

Back in Treviso, we see a cool finishing move from Rook, obliterating a poor Venatori guy. That bow on Rook's back though (I need it)! :O

"I believe in all of us. So let's get it done."

That little pep talk from Rook certainly worked for me. lol Like, whatever it is we're doing here, I'm so pumped, let's gooooo!

Then we get literally a millisecond of a frame, where you can see Ghili lying on the floor.. with the lyrium dagger stuck IN HER CHEST??

EXCUSE ME?? They wouldn't just spoil her death like that, right?? lmao Also, that adds another billion questions about this damn flippin dagger and at this point the list of questions is getting so long that I've completely given up speculating. 😂💀 We see how Rook tries to retrieve(?) the dagger but the power it emanates pushes them back?? What the heeellll.

And then I died. No, really. lmaoo

What can I say.

I cried. I screamed. My soul left my body. It happened. We FINALLY saw him. The Dreaded Wolf, He Who Hunts Alone, Roamer of the Beyond, God of Rebellion. The one everyone's been talking about since flippin 2009. And by GOD, he lives up to his NAME.

He's dreadful, he's horrifying. He's a monster, a nightmare. He's perfect. And just like Solas, he's just a Little Guy and bald. 😭😭😭

...At least in comparison to this dragon!! Look at that friggin SIZE DIFFERENCE. Someone measured the size by comparing them to Rook, who we see for a split second before Fenny leaps in. So, make no mistake, Fen'Harel IS the size of a high dragon, like he was described in Tevinter Nights... It's just that this blighted dragon is HUMONGOUS. lol That dragon, let's call him Elgar'nan, because we all KNOW, right?? Who else could it POSSIBLY be?? He's got the horns, he's the dragon on the vinyl cover with the Blighted Black City, he's ENORMOUS!! I've been saying this forever. Fen'Harel vs Elgar'nan, Battle of Gods was all I ever wished to see and FUCK, I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT WISH CAME TRUE. 😭😭😭

And look WHERE they are fighting!! It's Minrathous, you can clearly see the floating building in the background!! Which means the Dread Wolf is OUT. He's no longer trapped, or in the Fade. Remember Sandal's prophecy "When he rises, everyone will see". And he HAS RISEN. lmao And look at the lighting!! It's the same dim, gloomy RED we've seen at the end of the reveal trailer with the eclipse. "AN ECLIPSE AS FEN'HAREL STIRRED". IT'S HAPPENING. Remember the 2020 teaser MURAL.

Is this the Black City or is it the floating building?? Either way, it's BLIGHTED. In the trailer, Minrathous has clearly been completely taken over by the Blight. "All the world will soon share the peace and comfort of my reign", that's what Elgar'nan said at the end of the 2023 teaser, and what better way to take over the world than to start with the biggest capital in Thedas, a nation which built their own empire over the ruins of Elvhenan, ruled by the most powerful mages!

And I am SO scared. You can see Elgar'nan snapping Fenny. The dragon is blighted, and maybe so is Fen'Harel. He's also clearly been through so much. "The Wolf chews his leg off to escape the trap.", is what Cole said in Trespasser. I don't think he always looked like that. In the murals and the 2022 cinematic, he has a lot more fur. And I can't help but think about the devs saying that Solas wasn't always bald either. lmao How are they connected.. are they one and the same.. are they bound to each other.. we still don't know. But I'm SO. F*CKING EXCITED. TO FIND OUT.

Those few seconds of this scene were breathtaking and whoever made this trailer knew exactly what they were doing, because the editing is so perfect as Fen'Harel charges at Elgar'nan in slow-motion and the music cuts out completely while that beautiful wolf howl can be heard and you can almost HEAR everyone's jaw dropping on the floor. lmao THAT's. how. you. do it. *standing ovation* *sobbing*

Okay. Breathe. Moving on. We gotta get to the end. lol

The very next shot is SO funny to me, because we literally just got to see Elgar'nan, the biggest flippin dragon we've ever seen in DA and it's followed by a shot in which Elgar'nan looks SO tiny next to Ghilan'nain. lmaooo

His ego doesn't allow to appear small though, I guess, so he f*cking levitates to top her in height. lmao These two ancient clowns are already killing me.

What's interesting though is that this is the exact same angle from which we left off in the gameplay showcase. And Solas is nowhere to be seen, so... did he literally just "poof" away right there into that Fade prison?? lmao

We get a quick montage of all the lovely monsters we will face. Like I mentioned, there's the Elgar'nan dragon taking a swim in the ocean, I guess? (I hope he drowns. lol) And a shot of what I think is Irelin (from TN and The Missing) doing.. something with some magical device. Someone fighting a magical "automaton" in the Arlathan Forest. lol Harding doing her THING again, acting like Toph from Avatar, literally bending the flippin earth, like a true Child of the Stone!!

And right before the end, there's one of my personal favorite shots, Rook basically bitch slapping a Pride demon into full K.O.?? lmao

The trailer ends with a final beautiful shot of Pokemon Ruby & Sapphire. lol No, seriously. A SUPER blighted pair of angry dragons, seemingly at the same snowy place that Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain popped up earlier in the trailer. 👀👀👀

So, they might have something to do with this? There was a dead dragon lying on the ground in an earlier shot, so maybe the elven gods revived them? If I see Blue and Red, I'm of course immediately reminded of lyrium.. whatever that means. Or, given that they seem to be attacking Grey Wardens in this place... maybe we are looking at an altered form of Archdemons?? Or something similar to Corypheus' dragon? 👀 There is an interesting theory floating around that Ghilan'nain might look like *that* because she somehow merged with her lover Andruil. As I mentioned in the beginning, Ghilan'nain seemed to have been struck by a spear or something.. and in this shot, you can see that the red dragon is pulling a spear out of its body! Sooo... maybe that actually IS her?? And she somehow transformed into two different blighted dragons, representing herself and Andruil??? The tinfoil hat is strong with this one. lol

ANYWAY. The release date is revealed to be 31st of October, making this the best Halloween of all time!! Not only is it perfect because of its origin, Samhain, the thinning of the Veil between the living and spirits.. But also because we all get a chance to dress up as Manfred, walk into the store, buy the game and then go Trick or Treat (but mostly trick) in the name of Fen'Harel, the Trickster God. 😂😂💜💜💜

And that's it!! Now we only have to wait two months before we can all lose our collective shi— NO WAIT, OF COURSE WE'RE NOT DONE YET.

WHAT THE HELL

IS THIS

EXCUSE ME, how do you throw this in there in the background at the very last second, HELLO??? A rocky object, split in half. HUH, WHERE HAVE WE SEEN THAT BEFORE.

Oh, you sneaky sneaky people. The mural depicting a Titan's death.... Remember the description of this place in DAI's files.

"A final eluvian is situated in a beautiful bolt-hole where Solas has painted murals. Fen'Harel was here and wanted to make sure nobody ever found what the other gods were doing. This place was the breaking point for him that turned him against the gods."

Whatever this is... I think it might be the very reason why all of this is even happening. The Evanuris mined the Titans' blood and "something else" before they collapsed and sealed the Deep Roads with stone and magic.

"Terror, heart-pounding, ice-cold, as the last of the spells is cast."

"What the Evanuris in their greed could unleash would end us all. Let this place be forgotten. Let no one wake its anger. The People must rise before their false gods destroy them all."

I'll leave it at that. I'm so so so flippin excited. I want to thank all the devs involved, I'm so full of joy and can't wait to finally return back to Thedas in October. 🥹🥹🥹 (And if anyone wants to get me that "Rook's coffer" collectibles thing for my birthday two days after release, my address is— naah just kidding!! ..or AM I?? 👀😂😂)!! 💜💜💜💜💜

[bbanghiitomi]

| killing me softly with your song

synopsis: what if you were a talented child prodigy once? living life in lavish, spending years in the spotlight but a tragedy happens and you're forced to leave and hide. what if you meet a super hard-headed girl on the docks? what if you fall in love with her?

— nonidol!guitarist!kminji! × nonidol!pianist!fem!reader

(⁠￣⁠(⁠ｴ⁠)⁠￣⁠)⁠ﾉ (⁠￣⁠(⁠ｴ⁠)⁠￣⁠)⁠ﾉ (⁠￣⁠(⁠ｴ⁠)⁠￣⁠)⁠ﾉ(⁠￣⁠(⁠ｴ⁠)⁠￣)

“miss! hey! what are you doing?!” minji shouts from a few meters away as she spots a girl standing by a lone boat just floating near the docks, staring aimlessly at the sunset, while her hand is gripping the gunwale of the boat, just a gust of wind enough to knock her to the ocean and leave her drowning. minji furrows her brows at how you ignored her. she couldn't believe such a reckless person would just be standing at the edge of the docks and waiting for someone to push them into the sea.

“miss, you can't just stand there, it's dangerous! did you see the waves? if the boat gets knocked over there's a chance you'll drown!” minji continues to express her stress over the stubborn girl standing by the boat surrounded by other boats. if you were to fall over it'll be hard for you to swim upwards due to the boats floating around the area of the water.

minji runs to your direction and from afar you feel the vibration of her platform shoes hitting the wooden floor of the dock, you look behind to see her figure running towards you and you squint, bending your lips to a frown before once again turning your back against her. “please don't ignore me, you really shouldn't be out here at this hour.” minji adds, starting to get frustrated at your stubborn behavior that she couldn't quite understand.

you can hear most of what she was saying but has a hard time forming coherent thoughts of what was clearly said. you step out of the boat, with minji looking intently at your footsteps and guarding you if you ever fall. “careful —” she mutters, in which you shrug her by saying.

“move.” simply just like that you stand on the wooden platform of the dock while she looks at you in disbelief, your eyes still watching the sunset being buried under the dark shadows of the mountain. to your interest, you didn't care about what minji thinks — she is nothing more than a stranger who thinks they know what to tell you. she's just like those other people who think they can boss you around with what you want to do with your life.

minji squints her eyes and frowns. “are you not leaving yet?” she asks, you hear it this time although it was still quite muffled you knew what she is pertaining to.

“why do you care?” you ask her, your frank tone indicating the irritation you get by her constant prying over your business. minji scoffs, shaking her head. “hey, i’ve been calling out to you for the past few minutes because what you're doing is dangerous. did you even hear me?” you glare at her, your eyes narrowing as if warning her with every single word she says.

“i asked, why do you care?” you repeat the question but with a tone harsher than the first time. minji freezes — eyes darting at your eyes and the frown on your lips, unsure what to feel at the sudden nonchalant outburst. she starts to feel how her heartbeat got faster, her hands were shaking and she doesn't understand why she's suddenly so nervous.

“b-because… my family… they own the boat and if you fall over and drown, we’re screwed.” minji’s eyes soften as if she was begging, for you to understand and stop being mean! you stare at her eyes only for a bit, to her brown pupils then to her tall nose bridge. “fine, i’ll leave.” you mutter before leaving, the sole of your shoes tapping the wood surface.

minji watches you leave before following like a tail, you don't realize nor quite hear her but you feel the vibrations of her shoes along with yours. “i feel like you're following me.” you tell her, not even bothering to turn around and look at the tall girl. minji shrugs. “i am, it's dark here and you didn't even tell me your name.” she says, it ticks off something inside of you and you stop walking to take a deep breath.

“would it kill you to leave me alone? or do you want a restraining order against you?” you frankly tell her, expressing annoyance in her pursuit. minji looks at the back of your head and shakes her head. “no… i promise, i’m not a bad guy. it's just because i've never seen your face before and what if something bad happens to you?” minji expressed benevolently, standing still as if waiting for your answer.

“i live in the building standing beside the nakamura suite.” you tell her, your tone is apathetic — you couldn't care whoever this person was, what's her business and what she wants. but you find her amusing, a little — maybe it her persistence, her diligent aura and how she really wants to chase after you as if it'll gain her anything.

minji looks up on the night sky and sees the two tall buildings standing right next to each other, with the nakamura suite being taller and sparkling under the dark skies.

“wow…” she whispers.

“i’m nakamura y/n.” you face her once again, your eyes darting at her pair of round eyes — with a small tug of your lips, you take her breath away.

“i’m kim minji.” she mutters under her breath, left in awe with every second she stands right in front of you.

“you're just gonna stare or what?” your voice is assertive as you ask her.

minji blinks and laughs, rubbing her hands together and finding herself avoiding your distant gaze. “uh, i don't know. i have a car… if you don't mind i can give you a ride.” minji bites her bottom lip in hesitance, embarrassment of some sort — there's a lingering curiosity inside of her stemming from your mysterious presence and the looming aura of elegance.

“i don’t.” you answer her short and quick.

minji nods and leads you to a small front yard, where a old and used car is parked. minji dashes to the door of the driver's seat and grabs the keys dangling by her waist and unlocks the door, she — you couldn't believe it — crawls on the seat and started swatting non-existent objects on the passenger's seat and the backseat.

“...what are you doing?” you ask her, raising a brow at minji — your tone derisive as you speak.

minji groans as she crawls back out of the car and looks at you. “i just made sure it's not messy inside.” minji smiles. you nod and walk your way towards the passenger seat and notice her following behind.

you look at her as you stop in front of the car door and as you were about to reach for the door, minji immediately opens it for you. you take a step back, surprised.

you were about to speak but decided to just enter inside the car and sit properly.

minji runs to the hop inside the driver’s seat and starts buckling the belt. you follow her motions and relax your weight on the seat.

the drive to the building was quiet, you stare at the window outside while the gusting wind continues to blow your hair from your face. it's quite comforting, the scenery of the small houses and the blow of cold fresh air, it's enough to put you in a sense of tranquility — away from the noises of the bustling shibuya streets, screams of greedy people that burns inside your head, banging your eardrums till it hurt, too much.

sometimes, when you stare at a pool of water — it feels like the underwater is calling out to you, for you to jump. the feeling of water surrounding you, where you have nowhere else to turn to, nowhere else to swim but just a shallow water and a surface so far from your reach and you’re close to losing oxygen — the immense strength of the underwater slowly crushing your weak body and the lack of sound that is muffled by the water blocking your ears, everything is all too familiar for you.

that's probably why you were so pulled by the ocean waves around the small boat you were standing on earlier, and the bright sun that's about to set and disappear.

it hits way too close to home.

it's the same feeling of being under pressure, when your fingers are reaching for the piano keys, trembling with every second that passes by and it feels like you're stuck, unable to move or run away because there's just nowhere else for you to hide. you can't hear anything but the muffled noises of chatters from a sea of audiences, watching you from their seats and the light from the chandeliers of the theater is blinding.

suddenly, you can't hear anything.

“...y/n?”

“hey… you there?”

“...here…”

“miss!” you shoot your eyes open when you hear minji’s voice, you look at her with a glare but immediately change expression when you notice her confused expression.

“are you okay?” she asks, you blink and notice your eyes are wet… from tears. you wipe them away as you nod your head dismissively. “...yeah, i’m okay.” you tell her, you look at the window and see the entrance of the nakamura building.

you couldn't help but feel — annoyed, mad or whatever it is you just don't understand, you open the door and close it almost immediately before minji could react.

“y/n!” she calls for you but you have already ran away.

minji sits there, confused and asking herself what just happened but how would she know? it's making her crazy just how odd you were, how odd things are.

CAMPLAB (light music club)

danielle: where was aristotle when all of this was happening?

hanni: wth do you expect aristotle to do?

hanni: plus, calm down kim chaewon is just being dramatic.

hanni: how else would she stop us from being an active band? we don't need validations from prefects!

danielle: i certainly think we do if we want to actually have a degree in the future.

danielle: i just don't understand why she won't let us have the empty clubroom when we’re legitimate!

danielle: i can play drums and you can play bass, minji’s good at guitar! what else does she need?

hanni: minji we know you're online, can you at least help us think!

minji: idk i’m thinking too.

hanni: i doubt it.

minji: i swear i am.

danielle: where were you even at yesterday? i came to visit your family’s gift shop and you weren't there.

hanni: i doubt your rusty car could even travel past the bus stop.

hanni: HA! maybe you were getting it repaired or something.

minji: can you get ur brain repaired too?

minji: let's all be serious, it's the college board’s decision to not allow us. chaewon’s just following the rules, we can't have the clubroom if we don't get our letter signed, we can't get it signed if we only have three members.

hanni: oh god.

danielle: so does that mean we have to recruit? how else would we do that?

minji: geez, idk. maybe play a gig somewhere and find people in our campus who is interested.

minji: i just can't think right now…

hanni: whatever, can we at least meet at the campus park?

“but seriously minji, where were you yesterday?” danielle looks at minji as she speak, minji’s eyes are somewhere staring at nothing… she can't process the present, stuck at what happened yesterday, all minji could think about is you.

“right, i thought you were at the dock yesterday. it's not like a girl is in your business, i doubt any girl would even look at you.” hanni adds, taking a bite out of her bread. minji sighs exasperatedly, rolling her eyes before she scoffs. “can you choke on that bread of yours? you act as if you don't go out your way to get noticed by that loser from the basketball team.” minji bites back.

“she's not a loser, she's ahn yujin! and unlike you she actually knows how to impress girls.” hanni huffs, danielle laughs at the bickering duo before butting in.

“was there a problem in the docks?” she asks.

minji closes her eyes to think, was it really a problem? minji doesn't know how to describe her situation yesterday, she's certainly sure she's isn't dreaming or seeing things.

“kind of, there was this girl who was standing on our boat by the docks, surrounded by other boats. she's just there… unmoving, and i got so nervous because it was dangerous so i asked her to leave but she couldn't hear the first two times i called her.” minji tells the story, the three of time stops by a table around the park’s corner.

“and what happened?” hanni leans on the table, invested.

“she was so, how do i descirbe this? skittish? i don't know. then she got off and just stared at the sunset. i asked her if she was leaving and she aksed my why do i even care. i told her it's dangerous and she repeated the question again. i told her we owned the boat and if she drowns we’ll be in trouble but when she was about to leave i asked her what her name was.” minji continues.

“what was her name..?” danielle asks.

minji looks at her friends. “she said she lived in the building near the nakamura suites, her name is nakamura y/n. i offered to give her a ride on my car to the building and she said yes. but when we stopped, she was crying. i don't know why but then she just ran away out of the car then inside the building.” minji fiddles with her fingers, the two girls look at each other, confused.

“why was she crying?” hanni asks. “did you do something bad!?” danielle points her finger at her friend.

minji shakes her head and puts her hands up. “no! i also don't know why!”

danielle brings her hands down and frowns. “then why?”

“maybe some personal stuff? probably you know? she's just sad.” hanni answers and they all shrug, taken back by the story.

minji was determined to see you again, it doesn't matter where and when but she's sure she'll find you somewhere on this island once again.

she's thrilled by the idea of you, your mysteriousness, the secrets behind your sharp eyes and harsh gazes — the way your lip taks, the words that slip out of your tongue. you're like a rose, tempting but covered in prickling thorns and such a sight to look at, unattainable at a certain point but with enough determination and persistence she can reach out for you, even if it meant shedding blood.

at the football field, danielle forced minji, hanni, haerin, and hyein to all play baseball — even if it meant playing at the wrong place. minji was sure things were about to get nasty when hanni starts hitting the ball a little too hard.

“hanni! there's windows on the other side of the field! if you get someone murdered, it's over for us!” minji warns hanni, motioning to her neck as if telling her they're dead if an accident was to happen.

“oh stop being a bitch! that's not gonna happen i swear!” hanni hisses, trudging her way to the faux home base out of minji’s old chemistry textbook.

and minji knew it, not even after five minutes, with a swing of the bat and danielle’s powerful pitch, the baseball comes flying straight into a window, crashing onto the glass and breaking it apart.

“holy shit hanni!” minji shouts and screams from the other girls are heard, hanni drops the baseball bat and puts her hands on her head. “we're screwed!” she shouts. “shut up!” minji shushes them and looks at the broken window. “i’m gonna go there and be quiet! leave this field and go to the campus park, i’ll be back.”

“minji are you serious?” haerin asks but minji dashes out of the field to the school building.

after scaling the floor and the number of rooms, minji comes to the conclusion that the room might be on the 4th floor and the 3rd room. she runs to the stairs and looks around to see if everyone has spotted her. after securing the perimeters, she rushes to the said room and is met by a sight she couldn't believe had just happened.

you lay on the cold floor, motionless, a pool of blood under your head and there were sheets of music notes scattered around your unconscious body. minji takes a step inside and looks around the room to find the baseball on the corner of the room. she tries to gather her courage and think properly. if the ball is not covered by blood nor is it sitting next to your body, then does that mean something happened to you before the ball hit the window?

and not even the traction of the ball made it possible for it to hit you, as it was too far on the top corner of the window.

she reaches for your body and notices you're still breathing, minji breathes heavily and carries your body outside of the music room. she immediately spots the nurse’s office and calls for help.

“what happened?” the designated doctor of the building asks as she sees your state in minji’s arms. “i don't know, i entered the room and saw her lying motionless!” minji places you on the bed and walks backwards while the doctor examines you.

minji hears the doctor call for an ambulance and she stands there, confused.

“minji, does she have her belongings inside the room you found her? grab it and get inside the ambulance. i’m gonna have to call her parents in the meanwhile.” minji nods and immediately rushes to collect your things you left inside the music room, as she comes back — her eyes land on the music sheets once again and it drives her crazy how they're all crumpled and somewhere ripped apart. she sees your bag and grabs it before running and following the group of paramedics.

as the ambulance rushes, her eyes are on your temple that's covered in gauze, your eyes that are tightly shut. she feels bad, paranoid at your condition but she tries to keep looking at you.

minji’s heart is beating so hard inside her chest and she leans in order to get a better look at your face, she lifts her hand and reaches for your face to push the strands of hair sticking to your face.

“you’ll be okay, i’ll make sure of that.” minji whispers, feeling a sense of responsibility inside of her, the need to protect and keep you safe — yet, she doesn't understand where this feeling is blossoming, it's just there, she knows it's there.

your body shifts, almost surprising her. your eyelids move, and your eyes open to look at minji but there it is again — the bright light blocking your view of her face and the loud ringing of silence, blasting in your ears.

after a while, you're finally safe and the college heads are investigating what happened — they haven't come to a conclusion yet but the whole group chat with minji and her friends is chaotic, all of them thinking they're in trouble.

SEPTIC BANK

hanni: FUCK MY LIFEEEE

hanni: is it really over for us?

hanni: what about my dream of becoming a popstar?

danielle: they're investigating the music room, and the baseball was left by the corner of the room…

haerin: minji didn't take it?

hyein: no, nakamura was lying on the floor under scattered music sheets with a pool of blood…

hyein: she carried nakamura’s body to the nurse’s office and got inside the ambulance with her.

hanni: oh we’re actually fucking dead istg!!!

hanni: I’M A CRIMINAL!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE I MURDERED SOMEONE!!

haerin: you didn't kill anyone.

haerin: somehow i’m sure the baseball wasn't the cause of the accident.

haerin: besides, we can ask minji for some updates as soon as nakamura wakes up.

hyein: yeah, but if they ever find out it's us. we're screwed, she's kazuha nakamura’s sister and from my research they're popular and rich.

danielle: well… they’re the daughters of the owner of the nakamura suites and kazuha’s a well-known ballerina.

haerin: now i think we're definitely screwed.

haerin: how about you plan your migration back to vietnam hanni?

hanni: oh you're not helping are you?

hanni: LOOK i know it was stupid and i am ready to apologize BUT what if they sue me???

hyein: i do believe it's not our fault, look from what i’ve heard y/n’s got some serious problems.

danielle: now you're calling her crazy?

hyein: no! it's just that she's a famous child prodigy in japan, and has played piano since she was born.

hyein: you can go look it up!

hyein: but one day, during a tournament when she was 14 in switzerland, in the middle of her performance she stopped midway and completely blacked out. she sat on the chair unmoving and suddenly she was clutching her ears and crying.

hyein: for 4 more years, she tried to regain her skills back but it was getting harder.

haerin: i heard she’s got some hearing problems.

hyein: YES! that's why she's given up playing piano and settled here.

hanni: what does that have to do with me obliterating her!???

danielle: yeah, i mean maybe she's deaf or something but what does that mean?

hyein: panic attacks, explains the scattered paper all over the floor and ripped pages of music sheets.

hyein: look, i might be grasping on threads here but hear me out! she must've passed out and fell from the chair.

haerin: i get it.

minji buries her face in her palms as she sighs, she can't reply to any of the messages because of the paranoia inside her — she can't do anything while thinking of your situation, she can't just do anything knowing you're still unconscious.

“wake up please…” minji mutters to herself.

as if the heaven heard her prayer, your hand shifts, she takes notice of it and stands up — it hasn't been that long since you wasn taken to the hospital but it already feels like forever.

your eyes open to see minji looking at you, still the light is bright but you were able to make out her facial structures, her long hair and her eyes.

“minji..?” you mutter, minji smiles and nods. “yeah, it's me.”

you remember what happened.

again, alone at the music room and the surroundings felt shallow, your fingertips are trembling as you force yourself to play a piece — you're not even using your ears anymore, you read along the lines of the music sheet following the notes and imagine as if you were playing with the waves of the ocean.

but it's so hard to play music without hearing anything.

you stop abruptly, smashing your hands on the keys — feeling the warm tears prickling in the corner of your eyes as the sound of the keys in unison exploded inside the room, but you couldn't even hear it.

you hate it so much, so much that you grab the sheets of paper and start ripping them apart and crumpling them, shoving them all to the wooden floor. tears continue to pour out of your eyes, as if the room is about to be flooded you couldn't breathe properly and just like that — you lost consciousness and fell.

but, how did minji even find you?

“why are you here?” you ask her, your voice is weak. minji’s eyes soften and you notice the way she looks at you, don't know whether to like it or not, be insulted or comforted.

“sorry, my friend smashed a ball on the window of the music room, i came to get it and saw you passed out with blood. i— i carried you to the nurse's office and the doctor patched you up before telling me to come with you to the hospital. your parents are on the way.” minji explains, she's in a rush — you can only understand a few of what she's saying, because the ringing inside your ears hasn't stopped yet.

“i don't remember a ball hitting the windows.” you mutter, thinking minji might be lying. minji widens her eyes, surprised.

have you forgotten?

“uh what? wait, you don't remember anything —”

“i do. i just don't know what ball you are talking about. i passed out immediately after i fell off the chair.” you tell minji, she nods and is about to add to her explanation when the door opens.

“y/n!” your parents enter inside, minji immediately moves out of the way and to the door — she leaves.

minji hears the sound of the bustling hospital corridors, numerous people walking around, doctors, nurses, and patients. she stands outside your room and looks down to her shoes. now that your parents are here, she figured it was time for her to leave, which — even if she didn't want to yet, she still did.

SEPTIC BANK

minji: guys

hanni: OH MY GOD MINJI

hanni: WHAT HAPPENED????

hanni: AM I SCREWED??

haerin: ur back

haerin: how did it went?

danielle: YOU'RE SAFE!!

minji: i am. i went home after her parents entered her hospital room.

hyein: wait, what did her parents say?

minji: i don’t know, but y/n told me something.

hanni: WHAT IS IT?

minji: she said, she doesn't remember nor know that a baseball hit the window of the music room.

minji: she said, she passed out immediately after she fell off the chair.

hyein: SEE I TOLD YOU

hyein: she panicked and probably lost her consciousness

haerin: does that mean we're not guilty?

danielle: must be, but how are we so sure?

minji: not so sure, they're investigating the music room and tests are still about to be revealed.

hanni: oh…

hanni: ༼⁠;⁠´⁠༎ຶ⁠ ⁠۝ ⁠༎ຶ⁠༽

minji finds herself standing on the dock where she first saw you, based on hyein’s research — you were really playing piano, and that accident that happened to you was a result of your panic attacks. minji thinks to herself, what happened?

she's so curious, worried or sick — she wants to know so badly, what's the reason why you feel that way?

minji needs to hold you in her arms, rock you and make sure no one hurts you.

but how is she supposed to do that?

she can't even reach you, you're so far from her. like a moth to a fire, she's drawn to your danger — drawn to your fiery and brightness. “i should've gotten her phone number.” minji mutters, hands on her mouth, thinking hard when she can see you again. “but it would be stupid of me to ask her.” she adds.

minji regrets letting you go every time, if only she can grasp you only for a moment and just hold you — it sounds like she's desperate, but seeing you like that makes minji more drawn to you. minji paces around the wooden platform, the sunsets above her, the waves are calm.

when am i going to see you again?

“whoever got that damn baseball on the window will pay for this!” your father grumbles as he paces around your room, you follow him with your eyes as you sit on your bed, a gauze in your temple from the injury you sustained that day.

“i told you, it's not because of the ball.” you tell your father, not even trying to calm him down — you understand that anger blinds him, and he loses his motor skills to comprehend the situation without finding a way to use his power in it. “but there's evidence! the ball hit the window and it hit you!” he argues, you understand his point but there's your own memories that serve you correctly.

you really don't remember a ball entering the music room.

“and that girl, the daughter of the kim gift shop — i know she and her stupid friends have something to do with this.” he adds, as if it changes anything. you can only shake your head in disbelief.

you can't help but think of minji, about when she was inside the ambulance with you — the silhouette in your view.

she really did save you, according to the campus doctor — minji wasn't lying about her entry.

“just a few more hours, we'll receive the reports from the investigation. for now, can you please give some time to think. i need to rest.” you speak, eyes not even bothering to look at your father. it's hard to look at him, even after that incident from 4 years ago, it's still hard to look at his face after he told you your performance wasn't enough.

it kills you, still.

and suddenly the air inside your room becomes suffocating just five minutes after your father left, you're itching to come see the dock again and you're hoping (denying) to see minji once again.

the air feels a lot more like reality when you step your foot in the dock, your eyes are at the sunset — the ocean that illuminates the color of the skies, the sound of waves and the blow of the wind. you feel human once again, like you're actually alive and that you're a person — with feelings and thoughts.

and not just a robot programmed by society and family expectations.

for once you felt like you weren't a burnout.

“y/n..?” minji stands behind you, you turn around and see her — a gig bag behind her, she stands still and her eyes try to look for something in yours. you blink and walk forward. “yes, why did you leave so early?” you ask her — minji laughs sheepishly, blushing and she can't help but feel embarrassed by the troubling warmth of her cheeks.

“uh, your parents, i figured you might need more time with them.” she shrugs and scratches her cheek, you feel something blossoming inside of you — something you think is unfamiliar, something so out of character for you to feel. you can feel your heartbeat racing faster.

“what's up with your bag?” you ask her once again, minki looks at you and smiles. “my band, we have a gig tonight. we're planning to recruit a member for our club.” she answers.

“you have a band?”

“yeah, we kinda suck but you can go and check out our gig tonight with me.” minji smiles wider and you swear it did something to you.

“sounds fun.” minji laughs, grinning.

god she feels like an absolute loser now.

“it is, my car’s parked there.”

your eyes glimmer under the dim lights of the club as you stand by the audio technician’s corner, watching as minji’s band plays their self-made songs as well as covers of other songs. the audiences are cheering and you feel your heart beating at every strike of the drums.

you start to bob your head to the music, you were scared that there might be a time you lose your hearing to the music but you're wrong. you can hear the strumming of the guitar and the slaps of the bass, maybe except for the chatting of the people around.

you feel as if you're actually existing and occupying a space in the earth, even if it’s just a small bit — there's people around and your eyes are fixated on minji's presence.

she's amazing.

you think to yourself, feeling your heart as if it's about to jump off of your chest.

“you did great.” you tell minji, with a small smile — your eyes connect with hers. minji’s heart is shaken up, there's more than just eye contact to your connection with her. minji looks down on her sneakers, then back at you.

“thanks, i hope someone signs to our club after.” she replies, you now understand their situation. it seems like they can't occupy a space in the school if they don't have enough members to complete the requirements for a club application.

“something is still missing?” you hum, her attention is only at you and you only, forgetting the world outside you and her bubble.

“i guess…” she says.

you find her amusing, so amusing that it excites you.

“isn't that y/n nakamura?” haerin, the club owner’s sister — watching you and minji from a few meters away. hanni joins in with a cup in her hand, leaning and squinting her eyes to take a good look. “holy shit it is her!” she exclaims.

danielle smiles. “they look nice together. you think y/n likes minji?”

haerin shrugs. “i don't know. she does look interested though.”

hanni scoffs and rolls her eyes. “ah, i guess lots of girls today still have shit tastes. i can also say she's got that look in her eyes.”

“does that mean we're not guilty anymore?”

haerin looks at her girlfriend. “we still probably are.”

“once y/n and minji kiss, we’re free.” hanni laughs. “cheers to freedom?” she playfully adds, earning whispers from her friends.

minji drives you home, and on the way home — you can't help but feel quite happy to be here with her. maybe her presence makes you feel a little more like yourself. something you are yet to discover once again.

it's that minji’s sheer honesty, her persistence, and her transparency make her such a likable person, maybe you do want her.

do you?

you hop off her car as soon as she opens the door, you look at her and smile. “minji, can i say something?” minji turns around and raises her eyebrows at you. “yeah?”

“i’ll join your band.” you tell her, you watch as her expression brightens — she has this sickening smile on her lips, her eyes shine so bright under the night sky.

“what? really?” minji feels as if the world is turning around, maybe not upside down but it is turning around.

her eyes are staring straight into yours. and just a little, yeah — you feel like smiling, wider than you have ever done your whole life. “yes. i’ll sign the application letter tomorrow.” hanni was right, you do have that look in your eyes.

“that’s great! i didn't expect you’d like our performance.” it was kind of bad if you were going to be honest, it wasn't one of the best ever but it felt so real and raw, it felt like human. there's emotions, there's mistakes, there's intensity and connection.

it was one of the most entertaining thing you’ve ever seen.

maybe that's why you loved their performance, because they were enjoying themselves, so honest and forgiving.

“i did, so much.” you wave your hand at her before making your way to the building entrance but before you maximize the distance between you and minji she calls out your name. “y/n! wait!”

you stop on your tracks but take a few seconds to smile before changing your expression and facing her. there's only a medium gap between her distance to yours, minji lifts her hand and closes it in a fist, then she brings her hand down.

“let's go out sometimes. doesn't have to be a date or anything. doesn't have to be just the two of us… is that okay..?” minji blinks, she's kind of nervous as of the moment — because you were always so unpredictable, in the past few days she's been with you, you're still surrounded by intangible walls.

but she's so close to reaching you.

you smile at her, your eyes glimmer a kind of spark similar to a firework.

this time, minji knows — she realizes and sees behind your eyes, your smile.

“yes, that's fine by me.” you turn around and leave, and minji stands there, motionless and speechless. starstrucked? probably. lovestruck? yes, this might be it.

minji can't help the boiling blood traveling to her face and coloring her cheeks red, the uncontrollable face muscles that contract to form a smile.

minji places her hands on her cheeks and starts breathing heavily, trying to control the pace of her heartbeat, the funny feeling inside her stomach — the way her knees shake.

minji, you must be inlove.

[meanwaffle]

Comforting Ruby (Diluc x Alcoholic!Reader)

Echoes of the Night (Chapter 1)

☆ Tags/warnings: alcohol abuse, rivals to lovers fic, bartender diluc

☆ Notes: I wrote this back in april! I kinda retired fic writing, but I want to get back into it because it was always a hobby that made me happy.

I have chapter 3 of my adachi fic half way written as well for anyone waiting for that! super excited to share that and this! :) thank you for taking the time to read!

-

The dimly lit bar echoed with the sounds of clinking glasses and hushed murmurs from patrons scattered throughout the building. Some were there to share a dinner with their family, and others were loud with celebration. Yet, in this atmosphere of joy, you found yourself the odd one out.

The purpose of coming to the bar tonight had long left you, drowned in the constant noise and the swirling currents of conversations around you. The air hung heavy with the scent of various liquors, wines, and as you sat amidst the lively crowd, all you could do was let your thoughts attempt to bubble into something coherent before completely vanishing.

“ Ughhh .” you groaned under your breath. How did this happen? You were so drunk you couldn’t remember what was even in your drink, let alone how you managed to finish it all plus several others.

Empty beer mugs were stacked haphazardly around you, evidence to the hours you had spent here. Your thoughts were jumbled and slurred and any attempt to make sense of them ended with an expected failure. “I want more.” The words stumbled out on their own. “I want to order something sweet.”

Charles, who was only a few steps away, turned to face you. The friendly, familiar bartender smiled at you, followed by a firm head shake. "No can do, little lady." With a quick denial, he started to gather the glasses cluttered around you. "Yer already sloshed beyond limit. "

“ Charles !”

“None of that whining. I would have cut you off earlier if I wasn’t swamped tonight. I’m gonna have to find someone to bring ya home.” He glanced around. “and I gotta start getting ready to close. Closing early tonight! Big plans—.”

Despite his words being clearly spoken, you found it increasingly difficult to clearly hear him. The subtle movement of his lips became a blur, and strangely enough, the more you blankly stared at him, the more you forgot what he looked like. The sounds coming out of his mouth seemed to fall on deaf ears as your attention drifted into an abstract haze.

You allowed your head to fall back into the empty air. The corners of your mouth quivered feebly, attempting to form a smile that refused to come to light. Suddenly, your body convulsed as your head involuntarily fell forward and vomit forced its way out of your throat and into some sort of rustic bucket in front of you. The acrid taste of bile and alcohol lingered in your mouth, making you gag even more. Your breath was heavy and you gulped harshly to suppress the desire to puke more.

You were confused, drunk, sick, and you wanted to ask why the bar was across the room when you were sitting there not even two seconds ago. Did you move yourself or did someone move you? Maybe you were teleporting.

As the wave of nausea passed, you lifted your head, opening your eyes to a blurry world. Shapes and colors swirled around you, and you could hear fragments of sentences from other voices. Your head felt like it was spinning out of control, and the sounds around you were distorted and garbled. Then, for just a moment, all the different lines and textures and colors of reality lined back up together to form visuals you could actually understand.

Three individuals you couldn’t make out stood in the empty bar. ‘When did everyone leave?’, you wondered. The bucket in front of you is filled with the remnants of your previous meal, or lack thereof. All of them were talking and still you couldn’t make out any of the voices.

“ I’ll go home by myself,” It came out as more of a sob. One of the figures, someone you knew yet couldn’t recognize, was swift to stand by your side and rub your back. The compassion you could feel from them reminded you of your mother which made you break into another drunken sob. They quietly spoke sweet words you couldn’t stop yourself from ignoring. “I’m– no , I'm fine!” Stumbling through the thick haze of inebriation. Whatever they were trying to tell you wasn’t important enough for you to retain the information. More words tumbled their way out of your throat, but you were none the wiser to what was being said.

Their voices continued to speak, but moments were slipping away from you. Everything around you felt like scattered fragments of a dream. A dream you were enjoying.

-

The shrill sound of bells forced you awake.

You bolted upright unintentionally. The unstable bed shook, creating a wobble which tossed you off the side of the bed and straight onto the floor. Strings of curses escaped your lips, but you gathered yourself and sat on the edge of the bed; burying your head into the rough flesh of your palms.

The events from the previous night were blurry. Fragments of memories were somewhat understandable; only due to the burning shame in your chest and pounding headache. You remember going to the bar and throwing up, afterwards you ran out to go home... then... bricks. Lots of bricks. What was that about, you wondered?

“Oh my god…” you mumbled.

You glanced up and came face to face with today’s chaotic appearance. Your hair was messy enough to represent a rat’s nest. And geez, you didn’t want to even mention the sorry state of your eyes. The unfashionable black circles were darker than usual, creating a sharp glare. If a child saw you, it wouldn’t be unreasonable for them to scream, "Mommy, there's a raccoon trying to impersonate a human again!"

This was a daily thing. Looking in your mirror and pointing out any flaw you can find. Some people might argue it's not good for your mental well-being, but for you, it was a comforting routine. It brought some order into your life, something you could rely on.

You'd even think of ways to fix yourself. A haircut could sort out the messy hair, and maybe some skincare advice from Marjorie could help with those tired-looking eyes.

Yep, with just a little touch up you could really sparkle. Similarly to the ruby ring on your dresser.

…...?

A ring?

There, on the dresser, a vibrant ruby ring laid, catching the light and dazzling in your gaze. The gem alone was huge, but the gold accents made your mouth fall open! Confusion set in like a fog. That can’t be right; for you knew you could never own, let alone afford, such an extravagant ring.

You attempted to think back and decode your blurry memories to figure out how this ring even got here, but you knew it would be a failed effort. You can’t even remember how you got home!

You were left with one giant question. How did this ring end up here?

Oh goodness… you could only pray you haven't accidentally turned into a mugger. If getting blackout drunk transformed you into a thief, your drinking would be developing into a real problem and that wasn't the case! You never drink by yourself so that means you're perfectly fine.

Surely, there was a reasonable explanation. Perhaps you struck someone's fancy and they gifted you this ring as an attempt to capture your favor?

You glanced back over at the mirror. Nope, you've unquestionably sunk to the station of a mere thief.

With your sole concern being speed, you swiftly dressed and tidied up your hair as best as you could. There was only one thing you could do; return to the scene of the crime and figure out step by step what events led to the ring to end up in your home. And god forbid, if you did end up stealing the ring, you were prepared to humble yourself and plead with them not to press charges.

You wouldn’t be able to survive in jail! They don't allow prisoners to go to the bar!

As you power walked back towards Angel’s Share, suppressing the anxiety of facing the consequences of the previous night, one name dominated your thoughts: Mr. Six-Fingered Jose. He was an excellent friend, a genuinely kind soul who continues to uplift you despite your obvious flaws. The best part is, he sings at the bar almost every night. Surely, he must have seen you last night at Angel’s Share and can give you some sort of summary of what occurred.

Best case scenario, Jose can confirm that the only crime committed last night was the embarrassing display you can only assume you provided.

Worst case scenario, he already contacted the authorities and is currently giving them your description.

The building came into view and you swallowed any lingering anxiety as you walked inside. And if Jose doesn't have any information to help, Charles absolutely should. “You’re fine,” you thought to yourself, “one conversation and all this worry will go away.”

The tavern's warm wooden exterior came as a surprise. You were used to the cluttered atmosphere during the evening. The knights dragging their buddies in and out of the bar, the inside flooded with loud singing and lots of beer.

Potted flowers hanged along the windowsills and families seemed to be enjoying a meal together out in the sun. The sight put a thought in your head you never had about the establishment before.

How peaceful. Why would anyone drink at home when they can come here?

As you stepped inside, the interior was flooded with natural light, revealing more patrons eating, chatting and spending quality time in a social setting. The scent of brewing tea and the hum of conversation filled the air, much different from your usual visits. Amidst the lively day-time experience, there was a disappointing absence. The spot by the door, where Jose usually performed, was empty. You blinked a few times, your gaze transfixed, similar to a hydro slime caught in the blinding glare of a sudden fire. A dreadful feeling of idiocy crept up your spine as it dawned on you that the only lead you had wasn’t at the tavern because Jose only plays here at night!

You were so concerned with the sudden appearance of your, or whoever's, ring, that you didn’t take into account the time of day. Jose doesn’t waste his days confining his performances to the tavern alone. He wasn’t like you, he had a life beyond this place, other audiences to impress, and possibly more enjoyable company elsewhere.

Well, the simple choice would have been to walk out and continue your obligation of figuring out the events of last night. But you walked all this way! Surely, it’s alright to stay for a brief moment. A glass of wine is a must, especially in a troubled situation such as this one.

The bar was empty, but that didn’t surprise you. It was always quiet when you first arrived, with people trickling in as the night went on. Besides, it wasn’t like you came here earlier for the sole purpose to drink. You just had a good reason to come here and a good reason to drink.

A sense of shame welled up inside you, with the rational part of your mind warning against the terrible idea of drinking this early, especially after last night which possibly involved theft. But still, your heart rate was skyrocketing and you felt your breaths getting choppy. This ring was making you anxious.

“Just one glass is okay, it'll make the hangover more bearable” you justified to yourself, “and you’re in a stressful situation. It’ll chill you out."

Plus, while drinking you can speak to Charles. You vividly remember him cutting you off, so he might have an answer and you won’t even need to bother Jose with more of your troubles, so going to the bar is actually a great idea. The glass of wine is icing on the cake.

“Now may I ask why you’re here so early?” The words spilled from lips you didn’t know. With an air of sophistication and directness; it was obvious this wasn’t Charles. You had been so in your head about last night causing you to overlook the fact that an unrecognizable figure now occupied Charles's customary spot and, worst of all, was wearing his uniform.

...What intense eyes.

It was the first thing you noticed from the striking figure; deep, fierce ruby eyes. Matching red hair was tied neatly into a bun, adding some flair to his proper appearance. Chiseled facial features, followed by a strong jawline and high cheekbones, you could gather that he was a younger man.

And yet, the allure of his looks was overshadowed by the rude intentions the young man brought forth with his words. His furrowed eyebrows, on top of a glare not so subtly hidden, presented the first ever unwelcoming attitude you witnessed in this establishment.

“Excuse me?”

“It’s noon.” The unnamed bartender pointed his finger towards a clock, not even bothering to look in its direction. He was too busy gazing ahead, seemingly scanning something. Perhaps other customers.

You didn't know how to respond. This rando’s audacity actually had you stunned! What was he implying here? You mean, he could be busy tending to other odd jobs before the flow of bar-goers hits and is annoyed you interrupted that, after all he did seem distracted, but with that glare? No, he's absolutely shaming you for drinking wine this early.

You wanted to scream at him, get over it! Making drinks is the main part of the job and you should be ready to do it whenever! Even Charles, who has kicked you out a few times and cut you off more times then you can count, always maintained his professionalism within the job.

“And…? The bar is open at noon isn't it...?” You fired back, heat creeping up your spine and igniting an intense warmth in your cheeks. You haven’t even ordered yet. Glancing around, you spoke with a bit of huff in your tone. “Is Charles around?”

With a raised eyebrow, he responded “He is not.”

“Where is he?”

“How come you’re asking?” The red headed man stopped the minimal cleaning he was tending to, leaning onto one elbow against the bar and giving you his full attention. “Did you come here to speak to him?”

It was as if you were in an integration seat. “Well, no, I was looking for Jose. Not that it’s any of your business.” With a sigh, you avert his gaze. Eye contact makes you nervous. "But, if you must know, he isn’t here so I thought I'd speak to Charles. Glass of red wine, please.”

The red-headed man crossed his arms, his gaze unwavering and filled with suspicion. Frustration lingered as you tried to understand why this guy would be here instead of Charles. He lacks social manners! Why would they hire him? You didn’t even know they were hiring!

"Why do you need to talk to Charles if you were originally looking for Jose?" he inquired.

Letting out an over dramatic sigh, you sank back in your barstool. “None of your business.” your eyes wandered to the enticing array of wines displayed on a shelf behind the bar. “Just get me a glass of red wine, please .”

The bartender clicked his tongue disapprovingly. "Your attitude wasn’t this unpleasant last night."

"Attitude?" You began to raise your voice. Your body was halfway off the stool, preparing to create a scene. However, when the eyes of nosy customers bore into you, transforming your surroundings into a sea of awkward silence. You couldn't help but cringe at yourself as you shifted back into your seat, realizing your impulses always find new ways to embarrass yourself.

The bartender, with an eyebrow furrowed, was still looking at you as if he was waiting for a response.

“Wait, huh?” Your head tilted sideways, “You said last night?”

“Yes.”

“You mean, you saw me last, last night?”

“…Yes.” His lips pressed together in a straight line. ���Remember? We talked lots about–”

“Oh my god!” Jumping out of your stool, unintentionally creating the scene you just narrowly avoided, but that was no longer a concern. There was a break in the case! “We were here, right? At Angel's Share?”

"I guess you could say that…" His nose scrunched up.

"You guess?!" More eyes focused on you. Embarrassed but trying to stay cool, you cleared your throat, sat back in your seat, and lowered your voice. "Sorry, I meant—what do you mean by 'you guess'? Did you see me leave the bar?"

His expression tightened. It was strange—every part of his face was tense, from his stiff lips to his furrowed eyebrows. "…You were there. Don’t you remember?"

Why was he acting so weird? If he actually saw you last night, it shouldn't surprise him that you blacked out. "You saw me last night, but didn't notice how drunk I was? Of course I don't remember."

His eyes shifted, but he didn’t say a word.

Your demeanor transformed into a gentle plea for the answer. Initially, the bartender regarded you with a puzzled expression, as if you were speaking an ancient language, confused on why this interaction was taking place.

“It was painfully obvious you were drunk." He finally spoke. "But... to forget the entire night is unthinkable.”

"Well, news flash, liquor can do crazy stuff like that," you snapped, your voice sharper than intended. "Aren't you supposed to be a bartender? Shouldn't this be common for you?"

"This is my first day." He cocked his head to the side. "Surely, you would have seen me before if I was regularly working."

Yikes. You fell silent. After all, what could you possibly say in response to that? He got you good with that one.

If only Charles was here. You hated eye contact, yet here you were, locked in a silent stare with him. It felt like the final round of a staring contest, with a billion mora on the line. First, you wake up realizing you might’ve stolen a ring expensive enough to get you jail time, and now you have to deal with this… "aggravating roach."

"Did you say something?" "Yeah, I said, where's the wine I ordered?" You huffed. "Since Charles and Jose aren't here, and you aren't adding

You expected another snappy response, but instead, his face finally softened. Maybe if he kept it that way, the wrinkles on his forehead would ease up too. “…You were here past closing last night…” His tone wasn’t harsh. "I was here to talk with Charles about business. When I arrived, the place was supposed to be cleared out, but there you were. Head in a bucket. Jose was rubbing your back."

"And…?"

"….hm." He glanced to the side. "Jose walked you home."

Your smile transformed into a frown, the disappointment hitting hard. You had hoped for more—some crucial detail. Instead, all you got was a shrug and a nod, and the vague confirmation that Angel's Share was not the place the ring was snatched. Unless, of course, you pickpocket someone without anyone noticing, but that's absurd. How could you sneakily take a ring, drunk as hell, without anyone noticing? Especially when you were escorted home. The weight of the ring in your pocket felt heavier now, a reminder that you needed to figure out what the hell happened before there were any serious consequences.

He nodded, then turned his back to you, probably getting back to work. But who cared about his job? Certainly not you—what kind of bartender doesn't bring the wine after being asked twice? Whatever. That wasn't the goal right now.

Frantically, you reached into your pocket and pulled out the ruby ring, holding it delicately between your thumb and finger. You leaned forward, showing it to the aggravating roach. “Do you know whose ring this is?”

He glanced back for just a moment. “....It’s yours...?” The bell rang, notifying him that more customers walked inside. He turned over to the side, no longer looking at the ring.

Well isn't he unhelpful? Just loud and wrong. You parted your lips to speak, but then quickly shut them. Even if you knew it wasn’t a good idea to reveal to a stranger that you could possibly be a thief, especially one who asks so many questions for no reason. He absolutely seems like the type to report you to the Knights of Favinous! And yet, he was so quick to answer. It must be embarrassing for him to be so confident in an incorrect answer, but you can’t even point that out without exposing yourself. What a shame, that would have been good payback for earlier.

“That’s was a strange question,” he added, disrupting your thoughts. His attention was back on to you. “Do you not like it now that you’re sober?”

Is he implying you bought it when you were drunk last night? Funny, like you or him could ever afford such a ring. This is at least six months of your old salary.

You tried to think of a reasonable response. “It was… uh, lent… yeah, it was lent to me and I need to return it.” shaky reasoning, though it was all you had, “I’m just having some problems remembering… the wine... where's the wine I ordered?”

The man's lips tightened into a thin line before he pivoted and reached for a bottle of red wine. With no words, he poured the crimson liquid you had been yearning for into a glass. With an indifferent gesture, he placed it in front of you, not even granting you a glance anymore. "Jose performs near the Favonius Cathedral during the day, if you still want to talk to him.

"I'm well aware!" you retorted, quickly and untruthful, but he had already moved on to attend to another patron.

With shame, you brought the glass to your lips, allowing the robust flavor to momentarily distract you from the unsettling realization that this jerk seemed to know your friend better than you.

[dittydipity]

what is kagepro? - a quick guide

you may be seeing the word "kagepro" around a whole bunch, especially during august, but what the hell is it?

you may have heard or seen something from kagepro without realizing it! you know that vocaloid song, kagerou daze, about the kids who get hit by a truck and are stuck in a timeloop of saving each other? that's actually one of the songs from kagepro.

kagepro, short for the kagerou project, is a series created by vocaloid composer jin (also known as shizen no teki-p). it's a mixed media series that has music, manga, an anime, movie, a radio talk show, books, etc but i’ll try to keep it simple!

basic premise: people who die on 8/15 are taken to another world called the kagerou daze and if they return to the real world, they will have gained a “snake ability” that will turn their eyes red when used. a group of teens that have these abilities form a little gang but are thrown into an endless timeloop.

THE MEDIA

if you want to get into it, there’s a bunch of different ways you can do it, but do keep in mind: each form of media is NOT just a different adaptation of the story.

kagepro is a timeloop story, and each form of media is actually a different timeline (or “route”). the music videos, the anime, the manga, the books - each one is only a piece of the whole story. that’s why many people may have seen the anime, mekakucity actors, and gotten super confused because the anime is actually one of the last routes haha.

but the order of media that has been generally agreed upon to be the most coherent is music videos -> manga -> light novels -> anime

a lot of kagepro media, esp the light novels and manga, are hard to find since they’re almost entirely out of print, but there’s translations or e-book versions of them available, or if you skip them there’s summaries that people have made. you can also ask me if you want :]

music videos

i’ve actually made a couple playlists for the songs! one is in release order and the other is in story chronological order (mostly).

release order: - i tried to get all the original ia/miku versions of the songs with the original pv if there was one - a couple might be a little out of order since some songs came out together in the same album

this is the order that fans got the music, so if you want to try to figure things out and put things together the way we did you can go with this order!

chronological order: - tried to grab some english covers where i could, but if you don’t like eng covers there are plenty of noneng covers or you can use the videos from the other playlist. there's plenty of really great covers out there! - exceptions to the “chronological”: children record acts as the cover/opening song for the series and summertime record is the ending song for the series - some songs aren’t in here bc they’re not part of the music route (they’re mostly from the newer albums and are kinda like ‘epilogue’ songs after the ending of the anime/good ending or are songs made for the anime)

THE STORY

if you don't want to go through all the media yourself, here’s a video explaining the whole story by breadbox/david toth! he also has other really great kagepro videos

[a bit of an extra] a very common misconception about the story/mechanics: people do not have to die in pairs or with somebody else on 8/15 to enter the daze. i didn’t realize this myself until super recently

all in all, the kagerou project is a story about finding strength and support from the people around you, moving on to look towards the future, and overcoming trauma.

there’s definitely other people who have also made guides or summaries or videos that are much better and cover much more than i did, but i hope this was a decent introduction!

feel free to reach out and/or ask me anything! i'm sure there are also plenty of people who would be willing to help newcomers understand kagepro as well :]

happy kagerou day!

[thequeenofthewinter]

Work-in-Progress Wednesday

Hi, hello, salutations! I am back and taking a temporary reprieve from super grading mode to write, because if I do not, I will explode fantastically. So, here I am. I'm sorry I missed you all last week, but I was super stressed. Anyway, I've been working mostly in bits and pieces over the last few weeks and haven't really had much coherent work to share until now. (Although next week if you want, I might have some smut as a treat. ;) ) Without further ado, enjoy the build up to what is going to be a rumble of a time.

Tagging: @oblivions-dawn @dirty-bosmer @inkysqueed @vivifriend @bostoniangirl21

@theoneandonlysemla @pitiable-arisen @skyrim-forever @your-talos-is-problematic

@throughtrialbyfire @umbracirrus @v1ctory-or-sovngarde @bougainvillea-and-saltwater @ladytanithia

(I think I have fixed the tagging issue by putting people into separate paragraphs after 5. Thanks, Bishop for telling me this.)

Seconds which trickle slowly into minutes tick by as they both sit in companionable silence. It has been a while since they have been left alone without the hustle and bustle of others around them or Sylvi’s cries.

“It’s nice, you know?” Dahlia is the first to break the silence as she looks up a the stars above them.

Ulfric grunts noncommittally, and her brows furrow as she looks down only to see him leaning over the log he is sitting on, fingers steepled in deep thought. She knows that pose all too well as she has seen it too many times when she has found him sitting in his office staring into blank space. A lump pushes its way down her throat, and she shivers. There is no desk, no paperwork, no other advisors around—nothing anywhere for miles to set the wheels of his mind turning so hard like Dwemer cogs, only her. 

“You never did tell me exactly what it was that you wrote in that letter to get Madanach to agree to this madness.” He looks at her over the fire, eyes raking over her as if they will find the answer somewhere on her person. It is a look she is accustomed to seeing him give to others not herself.

For a moment, she is taken back to a time before they had gotten to know each other to when she was just the Dragonborn, and he was testing her.

“Staring at me as if I am a chessboard will not help you any,” she quips. “I know you don’t understand why I think that this is the right path, but I appreciate your confidence and faith in my abilities.”

“It is not that I do not have faith in your abilities. It is that I do not know why Madanach would agree to such as thing,” he sighs as he looks away from her instead opting to gaze into the fire, “and what he could possibly hope to gain from this. Why would he agree to meet with you of all people especially when he knows you are married to me?”

[aesthetic-gamersnail]

General Thoughts and Feelings about Trolls Band Together (part 1)

So, I don't know if this counts as a review, this is going to be more my thoughts on the movie (what I liked, my nitpicks, my head canons and what I would like to see in the future). This will not be coherent, it is really going be just chaotic thoughts. But be warned, because spoilers will be mentioned here. Also, the quotes might not be 100 percent accurate since I am quoting them from my memory, so be warned about that too. Have fun:

I really liked the portrayal of Poppy's and Branch's relationship and their development, because they feel like an actual couple and they feel like super natural and comfortable with it? Like there is no awkwardness and no jealousy and they are confidently saying like 'yeah, this is my girlfriend/boyfriend', I loved to see it

Interesting to see that Branch is still struggling with expressing his feelings and emotions, but that he is working on it, and you can see genuine development from the previous two movies. He still tries to push people away when overwhelmed with emotions and he deals with abandonment issues, shown especially well in the scene when Poppy goes after him after the fight with his brothers and says that she will come with him but he says that what is the point, she is going to leave anyway like everyone else did. And Poppy tries to calm him down, which actually works and it shows that he is bettering himself in that and doesn't let himself be controlled by his frustration and anger anymore. Branch generally seems to feel more comfortable in his skin and seems to be happier, which is very nice to see. Nice development here

Poppy tries to be more understanding of Branch's emotions and feelings and she supports him throughout the whole movie, even after the fight she doesn't push him to go back to his brothers but instead comes with him. I really liked it and it was really sweet

'You are not a Branch anymore, you are a TRUNK. Still could lift you though.'

John scoops Branch up when he sees him the first time again and Branch reacts as well as you can imagine - like a cat stuck on a tree

Love how John arrives and scoops Branch up, Poppy is immediately like 'Get your hands off my boyfriend!'

'When I said before you should tell me about things, maybe you should have told me you have a BROTHER?' 'Former brother.' 'THAT IS NOT HOW DNA WORKS!'

'Sorry, he gets a little hangry if he didn't have breakfast.' 'I DID have breakfast. It was an avocado toast with two poached eggs and a little bit cayenne pepper for the kick and it was DELIGHTFUL!'

Bruce bolting towards Branch and hugging him was super cute

Bruce and his wife are soooo adorable, and he is such a dad and he cares so much about them, it's augh (also Branch smiled so happily when Bruce mentioned he was a dad, he was happy for his bro)

John in the movie was being really inconsiderate of his brother's feelings and thoughts and was just pushing them towards perfection and his ideals. He redeemed himself of course at the end, but he didn't apologize at all which I think was a pity (actually no one of the brother's apologized, except Clay at the end, which is actually really sad because I think Branch deserved an honest apology and EXPLANATION, but I will bounce back to Branch and his brothers in a bit)

Clay and Bruce being really casual with each other was nice to see, but also Clay being super happy to see Branch and smushing his face

Clay really speaks to me as a character because he shows that just because other people think you're fun doesn't mean you can't be serious, love that for him

Clay and Viva do not seem to be in a relationship which I think is actually quite nice to see two people co running a village who are platonic buddies, even though who knows what the future holds. Maybe they will become a couple (or are one) which would be cute too

The portrayal of Viva's trauma was super nice to see, it felt really genuine and I liked it a lot (like how she did not want to talk about it and made impulsive decisions based on her trauma and fear)

Poppy and Viva seem to have a fun dynamic going on, would love to see more of that in the future (especially also with Bridget, since she and Poppy are super close)

Peppy did not mention for 20 Years to his daughter that she had a sister and she might be dead? WHAT?

Viva and Branch have a interesting dynamic because they seem pretty alike, and I like how Branch tries to argue with her because he has been through the same thing

Branch was sometimes not wearing pants in the bunker, sooo, yeah. That's a fun fact from the movie

Bridget was just being a girlboss thoughout the movie

Gristle and Bridget on the verge of death being like 'Let's make out :)' (Gristle and Bridget, even though having short cameos, were very fun and cute when they were on screen)

Floyd saying to Veneer that just because someone is your family doesn't mean they can treat you like crap is such a reflection on his relationship with his brothers, omg

Floyd taught Crimp how to play the ukulele, awww

Continuation in part 2

[teddybeartoji]

CHALLENGERS (2024)

i've been racking my brain for quite some time now to come up with a way to really express how i feel about this film - and i think the best way to do it is just to say that it truly made me want to get into filmmaking. and that it made me feel so fucking alive. it felt like a different type of oxygen. like crack or something. this is obviously going to be a ramblepost so i apologize if it's super fucking messy. also big spoilers will come with a warning so don't worry abt that. i am going insane.

+ btw here's the trailer if u don't know anything abt this hehehehe

anywayy i've never sat through a WHOLE film with a smile on my face bc i was just so fucking excited. elated is a really good word here i think. all of the following thoughts and words are in fact coming from my lower tummy bc no other film has turned me on so much as this did. it's not about sex btw.

luca guadagnino understands. he really fucking does. this guy is everything i want to be. it's all about the intimacy and the closeness. the sweat. the colors. the eyes. the dialogue. the camerawork. the build-up. staging and blocking. lighting. it is about sex but not in the way that you think. forget about porn and smut and whatever the fuck you think sex is. it's about watching and observing. taking everything in. it's about your heartbeat. the warm and fuzzy feeling in your stomach. a tightening knot. want and desire. anger. the rawness of it all. just the way things should be. forget about quickies and think about your best friend thinking about your lover. it's hot, right? it's about the rush. it's about sharing and not sharing. it's about greed and envy. think about sore muscles - how good they feel. think about flashing lights and thrumming bass in your ears. it's about music that makes you feel alive. it's about nudity, it's about power. humility and the absolute lack of it. it's about real humans, real people. eroticism. kissing. disgust. need. spit and saliva. tongues dancing together. muscles. skin on skin. laughter. love and something that's very akin to it but not quite the same. extreme close-ups and moments in slow motion, followed by fast-paced cuts and scenes. slapping. teasing and bickering. it's about everything i could possibly want in this fucking life and luca just handed it all to me on a silver platter.

i'm trying so hard to make this as coherent as possible lmao please bear with me i quite literally shed a couple of tears just from the overwhelming feeling this film gave me.

the casual intimacy is insane in this. one really specific thing made me absolutely lose it - there are TWO scenes where art spits out his gum into people's hands. the first is with tashi and the second time it's with patrick - both times they stand so close together that they're almost brushing against each other and they keep eye contact. there's zero disgust, there's no ew you just spit your gum into my hand. they ask for it. both times, patrick and tashi, hold out their palms for art to do it, and they do it without a word. no please or spit it out. i loved it so fucking much i wish i was better with words bc this genuinely had such a big effect on me. this type of intimacy is so important to me. it feels so real.

the dialogue was fucking great. i feel like the script is often where i might get The Ick bc i just hate when it's just so clear that it was written down without a second thought abt whether or not people actually talk like that (ok this actually might just be a problem with every single film my country makes but still). this felt good!!!!! they talk over people, they talk about small irrelevant things. they repeat what they said, they giggle, they laugh - again, it just felt so real and i loved it.

also. men in shorts. sweaty men in shorts. with shirts and without shirts. biceps. more sweat. muscles. we need more of that in life actually. i think men should wear shorter shorts and they should bend over more. ALSO MIDRIFF. SHIRTS RISING UP JUST A LITTLE, GIVING US A GLORIOUS PEEK OF WHAT'S UNDERNEATH. WHEN I TELL YOU THAT LUCA UNDERSTANDS I FUCKING MEAN THAT SHIT.

THE SOUNDTRAAAACKKKKKK RRRRRAAAAHHHHHHH EVERYBODY SAY THANK YOU TRENT REZNOR AND ATTICUS ROSS WE LOVE YOU TRENT REZNOR AND ATTICUS ROSS!!!!!!!!!!!! i mean it's obviously not a surprise that the score slaps so hard bc well... these guys have yet to make a bad score lmao. but this one is genuinely one of my favourite scores i think. super fast paced, exhilarating - it suits the film so fucking good holy shit. fuck it i'll give you a few songs:

challengers: match point + yeah 10x + pull over +

the cast was incredible. and also very hot. i think they were all so fucking perfect and i have literally zerooo complaints abt them i loved them so much. but if i had to pick a favourite performance... it's josh o'connor as patrick zweig. fuuuuckkkk, man. ok maybe i'm a bit biased here i do wanna kinda eat him buTTTTTTT HE'S AN AMAZING ACTOR OKAY. i loved his character soooooo fucking much and i think he did such a good job at portraying this little silly fucked up guy. the way he looks at art, the way he acts around art...

here are two crazy fucking examples for you the churro + the chair uhhhhhhh i am very unwell abt them actually what the fuuuuckkkkk

oke but yeah i just might be really down bad bc i really do love overly cocky assholes with beautiful big smiles okay don't judge me

THE VISUALSSSSS OH MY FUCKING GODD THE COLORSSS!!!!!!!! IT WAS SOOOOOOOOOOOO BRIGHT AND PRETTY AND FUN AND ALIVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EVERYBODY CHEEERRSSS!!!!!!!!! it's such a big problem nowdays that all of the films are so fucking dark like bro where's the sun...... dark and just very dull you know??? and i hate it i hate it so much. this was great though. again - super birhgt and colorful, luca plays with the light like a god and he's really making me believe that the cinema is truly backk!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

they also mentioned spider-verse!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i <3 luca fr

okay i think this covers most of it. i think. i have already decided that i'm gonna go and see it again next week so i'm sure that i'll be returning to this post!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i hope you can all feel my love for this wonderful piece of art and i hope that you all will go and watch it aswell!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 ily thank you for reading<333333

[ruinationz]

i just started going to tadc like less than a week ago, can you pitch showtime to me .. im inchrested

prepares my 200 page slideshow presentatio- jk lol i'll mini ramble under the cut

WELCOME TO FLIPPY'S SUPER AWESOME SHOWTIME PITCH. HERE WE GO.

-FIRST OFF their whole little motifs tie into eachother. caine is a leader figure (think the "king" of the gang, since he's a ringmaster) and pomni is a jester...plus they both DIRECTLY follow the circus theme out of everyone else in the main 6. see below

LIEK YOU CANNOT GIVE ME THESE TWO VERY SIMPLE CONNECTIONS AND NOT EXPECT ME TO GO RABID OVER THEM

-they also have a few nice contrasts such as being the technical antagonist and protagonist, caine being loud and flamboyant while pomni is quiet and a bit more reserved (from what we can see so far), idk i like it im a sucker for it. it never fails to get me

-caine isn't evil despite being. yk the "Zany AI Web God Inspired by AM from I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream who's basically the Embodiment of Hatred Of Humanity itself". gooseworx has stated that he's genuinely oblivious and has a bad time understanding humans, and is doing his best to get to know them better. so it's likely we'll see him develop as a character throughout the series and as a result develop a dynamic with pomni (evil grin.)

idk not much else that's coherent to say :3c to each their own about it but i really adore the two a lot ! it's a big comfort + they're both silly. my toxic trait is assigning every song from the scary jokes with them

[becauseplot]

*returns to yours* I HAVE THOUGHTS! NOT COHERENT ONES TOO SLEEPY AND NEED TO SAVE COHERENCY BUT THOUGHTS!!! MOSTLY ABOUT ISLAND TEAPARTIES AFTER THE KIDS ARE ASLEEP WHERE CELLBIT AND PHILZA DRINK TEA AND PHILZA TEACHES CELLBIT ABOUT STARS AND CELLBIT SLOWLY GETS BACK INTO HIS ENIGMAS AND THEY BOTH BITCH ABOUT TEA BUT DRINK IT ANYWAY BECAUSE IT HAS GOOD STATS

YEAAH!! YEAHHH!!! Okay okay okay so I meant to ramble more earlier when you initially responded to my ask and then I got sleepy and conked out and now it's super early for me, nailed it lmaooo. so anyway just like a couple things i noticed abt this scene *rolls out a scroll of notes, the bottom hits the floor and bounces out the door cartoon-style*

Chayanne gives Cellbit a rose!! Idk if Rose still has influence here (I'll have to sift through Phil's VOD to see if he says anything abt Rose, yesterday I mainly watched Cellbit's POV) but he's protected now!! That kinda folds him into Phil's "closer" circle of friends/family since it's primarily them who carries the roses for protection so!!!!! I'm!!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE TEA!! Yes the tea the way the tea immediately broaches the topic of purgatory, and yeah the audible wince in Phil's voice after Cellbit says the tea triggers him and Phil agrees. Yeah it's so shit and they're both so sick of it but it's so OP. Phil survivalist (hardcore) :handshake: Cellbit survivalist (hunger games/"The War"), do and use what is necessary to keep yourself alive.

And AAA!! Yes, okay okay so like you remember that idea abt Phil and Cellbit having late-night convos at the Order pre-purgatory? This is basically that!! It's late at night, they're getting caught up with each other, they've both got the shitass tea and it's going cold and!! In my head this scene goes on for a full night and they just sit and talk and talk and talk, eventually conking out when it's late, just like old times EXCEPT THEY HAVE THEIR KIDS NOW WHICH IS ONE OF THE THINGS THAT BROUGHT THEM TOGETHER, THEIR DESIRE TO FIND THEIR KIDS, AND THEY FOUND THEM!!! (I should write a fic i NEED to write a fic, me vs the 754389 wips in my brain; in my head they still had late night convos in purgatory when their "play time" timers lined up, phil waking up early enough and cellbit staying up late enough for them to talk while the others slept)

The way Cellbit still minces his words abt what he and Bags did post-purg 1 "we had our fun...bolas...style..." is it because he thinks Phil will think less of him? because there's children present? because his SON is present? idk how much Richas knows abt what Cellbit did in purgatory, Richas *did* rescue him while he was fighting eye workers but does he know about Cellbit hunting fellow players for sport? what Cellbit did to his pai Pac? I NEED ANSWERS

Phil's "Dude! No! Oh my god... D:" to when Cellbit says Roier was better off without him. PHIL WAS AT THEIR WEDDING. HE TOOK THE GODDAMN PHOTOS OF THEM AT THEIR WEDDING. HE SAW HOW HAPPY THEY WERE, HOW HAPPY ROIER WAS, WHEN THEY WERE REUNITED IN PURGATORY. Phil isn't close enough to Roier nor speaks to him enough to really understand the full extent of Roier's grief after purgatory 1, but it's gotta be hard for Phil to imagine Roier happy with Cellbit gone. Whether he believes it when Cellbit says "yeah Roier told me he was better" (doied WHEN I GET YOU---) is up for debate but I think about this constantly.

Phil fucking laughing when Cellbit admits he ate some of the eye workers fhdjsk. I can't get over the combo of Cellbit POV (in character thinking: "I'm terrible I'm a cannibal I'm a monster") vs Philza POV (cc who laughs at everything that is even remotely cursed) honestly, taking this as in-character (bc ccPhil doesn't mute his mic to laugh and he...usually does that for ooc bits while in the middle of rp), it says a lot abt qPhil that he's able to just laugh abt an admission of eating corpses. ethics who? geneva convention who? qPhil doesn't know her. munch on those eye workers king they're dickheads. (fuck, DOES qPhil know that Cellbit is a cannibal, as in, he has eaten not just workers but other players?? hmmm...)

"I'm sorry I couldn't do much as bolas leader" "It's better that you didn't see us...I think you'll be disappointed" "oh I could never be disappointed what do you mean shut up *laughs*" GODDDDDDDD also Cellbit trying to say he got worse after purg 1 and Phil saying "nah bolas is already at ground level" (either not understanding or indirectly reiterating that he won't condemn Cellbit for his actions, I can't tell) and then Cellbit just,, going with it. because it's not worth it to argue and he's trying to move past all of that now anyway. (QCELLBIT PROCESS YOUR TRAUMA CHALLENGE LEVEL IMPOSSIBLE)

watching Phil's POV now and HFDJSK you can't hear it on Cellbit's stream but Phil catches Richas as they're both leaving and says quietly, "Take care of your dad, Richas, n' take care." I'M 💥💥💥💥 (<-banging table)

Anyway!! This is what happens when the two characters I'm obsessed with interact for the first time in months. Over-analyzing a 5 minute convo. Sorry, it will happen again :] Praying they stay as neighbors I'd love to see archivists have more interactions!! And yes yes yes yes the tea parties with the kids!! Phil routinely chatting with Cellbit and watching him slowly "regain his color" as he settles back into peaceful life post-purgatory, falls in love with enigmas again. They've always trusted each other when they don't trust themselves, and they're both a Stable Point for the other. I'll miss what we never got to have with the leaders-of-the-Order-having-meetings ideas (timezones, wails) but I'm so excited for new island mysteries!! :D

[finn-m-corvex]

Whumptober Day 31: Setbacks

So. Tumblr decided to delete this one, so I had to hurriedly rewrite it just today. This is not what I originally wrote, and I'm not super proud of this one, but I would rather have something to show for the final day of Whumptober than nothing at all. This has been an amazing journey, and thank you all for taking it with me! Happy whumping, and I hope you guys loved the ride while it lasted <3

Taglist: @splinnters @abigailxoxo @tornoleander @mondothebombo @toastingpencils37 @ghostwalloper @lightning-chicken

Words: 2k

“Sorry,” Jay babbled, leaning down to try and clean up the glass shards littering the floor, “sorry, sorry, I’m so sorry—”

The ringing sound of the plate crashing against the floor rang through his ears on repeat, every loop making his anxiety grow more and more. How stupid could he be?

First his friends were just talking about how good dinner was, complimenting Zane and his cooking skills when Jay’s vision just started tunneling and his breathing was coming up short. He didn’t know what triggered it, but the next thing he knew his hand was loosening and the porcelain slipped from his grasp. So now the least he could do was try and clean it up. Maybe they would forgive him.

“Jay,” Nya tried to say from a couple feet away, cringing at his bare feet and the large pieces of the broken plate surrounding him in a rough circle, “it’s okay, I promise, just stay still and we’ll handle it.”

He cried out as the shards cut into his hands, and he dropped them back onto the ground. Why did this have to happen now, of all the times? Jay was finally starting to get used to being in a friend group, to having people to talk to, and now he went and ruined everything just because someone brushed a little too close to him in the way that he hated and his hands wouldn’t stop shaking and he couldn’t breathe and the next thing he knew the plate he was using to get food was shattered on the floor and there was no way he could step over all of the glass.

Fresh blood flowed from the small cuts in his hands, and Jay’s heart sank when he spotted Zane going for the small medkit that Lloyd kept in his apartment. The cuts stung pretty bad, but Jay would’ve put up with it. So of course, of course it was him that was going to be costing Lloyd medical supplies that he could be using to treat his own injuries instead of Jay’s. First Master knows how many bullies jumped Lloyd per day. How selfish was he?

“Hold on, bud,” Cole said, and the bigger boy used his boots to gently brush away all of the glass shards. He hooked his hands under Jay’s armpits when he reached the smaller boy, lifting and depositing Jay onto the kitchen counter. Jay felt like a child, and he hated how he couldn’t hate feeling like that. “That’s better. Just stay up here while the others clean up the glass.”

Kai came around the corner with a broom, Lloyd behind him with a dustpan, and both of them shot Jay a smile as they started to sweep up the broken glass. Zane stood next to him, rifling through the medkit, and Jay latched onto his sleeve out of pure instinct. Zane’s sweaters always felt nice.

Cole hummed on Jay’s other side, locking arms with the smaller boy and staying quiet so that Jay could gather his thoughts. Not that Jay had any coherent thoughts to gather.

“Nya, can you grab a bowl?” Zane asked, and the girl moved to do so.

She held the bowl under Jay’s hands, and Jay didn’t understand why until he saw Zane pull out the peroxide. Oh yeah, it was probably a good idea to try and clean the cuts before bandaging them up. He wouldn’t have remembered to do that if he was on his own. The bowl was also catching whatever blood wasn’t flowing past his wrists and down his arms, soaking into his sleeves.

Warmth stung in his chest, and Jay swallowed thickly to keep the tears back. The last thing he needed was to show all of them how much of a crybaby he was.

Zane dabbed at the cuts with a soaked cotton swab, and Jay had to restrain himself from flinching away. “I’m sorry, I know it stings,” Zane said, but Jay only shook his head. It wasn’t his fault, and there wasn’t really anything that Zane could do about the pain. Jay could suck it up for a few minutes; he had definitely taken worse.

He worked with precision, gently cleaning the cuts and wrapping them afterwards. Nya started talking about her latest art project to help distract Jay, and even though all of the colors and the terminology went straight over his head he still loved to hear her talk. She forgot that he was self-taught and knew jackshit about anything professional art, but that was okay. At least they had some common ground to work with.

Finishing up, Jay glanced at his hands with a guilty expression as Zane packed up the medkit and moved to put it away. Cole was still humming, tapping his fingers on the back of Jay’s hand in a beat that made Jay smile despite the anxious feeling still clawing at his chest with the world’s largest talons. He kicked his feet back and forth in an attempt to burn off some of the nervous energy, but to his dismay it only seemed to be getting stronger. It peaked when Lloyd and Kai took steps towards him, and any happy feelings that he may have had before were gone, replaced by a growing sense of dread as the two started to box him in.

Because he didn’t see Lloyd and Kai. Instead he saw two bullies, much larger than him, closing in and getting ready to hit him—

“Jay,” Nya tried, noticing the way he was curling into himself. Jay brought his arms up and over his head, scooting backwards on the counter until his back hit the wall. He was shaking, tucking his head between his legs and doing his best not to throw up all over the counter that Zane had literally just cleaned. “It’s okay, really. We’re not mad.”

“I-I-” and Jay had to shut his mouth to keep the sobs inside. He couldn’t break down in front of his new friends, not when he had to put in every effort to not look like the weak person he knew himself to be.

Zane, sensing Jay's distress, immediately moved back to the counter, bending down to meet Jay at eye level. He made sure to push Kai and Lloyd back, knowing that Jay needed some space at the moment. "Jay, it's all right. You're safe here. We're not going to hurt you."

Jay could barely hear Zane's comforting words over the rush of blood in his ears, pounding against his skull. He was trapped, caught in the grip of a memory that clawed its way to the surface and between the bodies of the girl he loved and his best friend since forever. Even if he could get off the counter, he still had to worry about getting past the other three. The vivid images of past confrontations with bullies flooded his mind, overwhelming him, and he couldn’t shake the feeling of being surrounded by people who wished him harm rather than wishing him well.

But it wasn’t just bullies.

Cole placed a gentle hand on Jay's trembling back, offering a grounding touch. "Take deep breaths, Jay. In and out. We're here for you."

Lloyd and Kai exchanged concerned glances, realizing that their attempt to comfort Jay had backfired. They took another step back but still looked on, faces filled with worry. Eventually Kai stepped away, whispering something to Lloyd about getting Jay a blanket before disappearing off into the living room.

Despite the words and the hands trying to reassure him, Jay felt the walls closing in tighter and tighter. He did his best to focus on his breathing, trying to follow Cole's advice, but the memories clung to him like a vice.Cole eventually shooed Nya away and off the counter, and Jay sobbed as his best friend’s arms wrapped around him and held him, rocking them back and forth on the counter.

"Jay," Zane's voice was calm and soothing, "we're here to help. You don't have to be afraid. You're safe."

The smaller boy rapidly shook his head, hiding into the depths of Cole’s sweatshirt and continuing to cry. He didn’t feel safe, not when he was surrounded by people with no way out. Not when he just fucked up and knew that they would be upset with him. First Master, what if Lloyd’s mom ever found out? She would be so upset. Jay would never be allowed to come over again and she would ask him to never talk to Lloyd ever again and he already knew that the others would pick Lloyd over him and Jay was going to be alone again—

“Bud,” Cole said softly, hand starting to rub Jay’s back, “I need you to talk to me, alright? What’s wrong?”

Cole was the only one here who knew Jay’s past; he was the only one that Jay could trust. He grabbed at Cole’s hoodie, the pain shooting up through his arms as he did so, but Jay couldn’t bring himself to let go. It was getting so much harder to breathe, and Jay wanted nothing more than to be back home and safe and under a blanket with his pa sitting in his armchair and his mom playing music in the kitchen. Of course, Jay’s first sleepover had to go completely awry. “I’m so sorry.”

“For what?” Cole asked, ever so patient with Jay. He always had been and Jay hoped that Cole always would be.

“I-I dropped the plate,” Jay stammered, voice soft enough that Cole was the only one who could hear it, “and I don’t want you guys to be upset with me. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry—”

“Good grief, Jay,” Cole sighed, and Jay’s stomach dropped with the thought that Cole was upset with him, “I’m not upset, I know that look on your face. It’s okay, accidents happen. No one’s angry, we’re not going to hurt you, and we just want to make sure that you’re okay.

And the anger that welled up in Jay’s chest was scorching and unfamiliar, the heat licking at his insides and making him shake even harder. He was angry with himself, for ruining the progress that he’d been making with his friends. It had been so long since he had a meltdown like this in front of them, and of course just when things were going well Jay had to go and ruin it by dropping that stupid plate.

“Let it out,” Cole soothed, one hand gliding up to Jay’s hair and tangling itself in his curly mop. “You bottle up way too much stuff, just let it out. I can take it, I promise. Do you want Nya next to you?”

Jay nodded, and Nya was quick to scramble up onto the counter next to them. She wrapped her arms around Jay’s waist, pressing a light kiss to the side of his head that caused Jay to instantly flush. Nya didn’t notice, only laying her head on his shoulder and whispering encouraging words as he finally started to get his breathing back under control.

"That's it," Nya encouraged, her voice a soft murmur. "You're doing great, Jay. We're not here to hurt you."

Sure, they weren’t here to hurt him, but he still somehow managed to hurt himself. “I was doing so good,” he said angrily, and both of his friends’ grips tightened, “and I had to go and fuck it up. All that progress and for what? This?”

“It’s okay,” Cole assured, “setbacks happen. It doesn’t make you any less of a person for having one or two or even three. It’s all just a part of the process. Stop being so hard on yourself and just let us take care of you, okay? That’s what friends are for.”. 

As the wave of panic began to recede, Jay became more aware of the warmth of his best friend’s arms, the faint hum of the refrigerator, and the concern etched on his friends' faces. It was a stark contrast to the haunting memories of cruel smiles and taunting laughter, the harsh words of the bullies compared to the kind words from the friends that he never thought that he would have. 

“Yeah,” Jay agreed, wiping his eyes on Cole’s sleeve. He could feel blood start to soak through his bandages, but he pushed out the guilt that tried to consume him when he thought about asking Zane to re-bandage his hands. “Yeah. Okay. I-I can do that.”

[hurtcomfortficstilltheend]

Mateine is the new caffeine

Wednesday Addams x gn! argentinian! Reader

Summary: Wednesday tries mate for the first time, by the hand of her partner, Reader.

Warnings: None! Only fluff! There is no use of "(Y/N)".

If you are not argentinian or southamerican, I explain the whole "mate" thing at the end. You just need to know that it's a very popular (non alcoholic) social drink in some countries in Latin America.

(Also, you don't need to be latinamerican to read this ofc)

A/N: Very self indulgent as always ;D Soft!Wednesday ahead!

Word Count: 1178

Your eyes were locked to the screen of your tiny laptop, your fingertips tapping incessantly on the keyboard, and your headphones on tight, blasting Brahms' second symphony. You had left a super important essay for the last minute (you were upset but not surprised), and now you were fighting against the clock to finish it on time for the first lesson tomorrow morning. Or today. 

After a quick wrist watch check- 3:54. Great. For the first lesson today then.

Your hand reaches instinctively for your hot water flask and serves another mate. You reread the last paragraph written on the open docs while sipping the lukewarm beverage. You swallow the liquid with a slight wince and keep writing.

You had once been ashamed that it took this amount of different sourced input to get anything school related done, but after some time, you just accepted that mateine, loud instrumental music, and leg bouncing was your only way, and that was okay.

Once you reread the whole thing again (and whisper a prayer to any coherence-and-cohesion god out there), you adjust the format of the document and send it to print in the principal’s office. Very proud of yourself for actually finishing it on time, you pick up your mate set to remake, get up with a jump and turn around-

-to find Wednesday standing right behind you, staring at you like you owe her something. As expected, you let out a squeak and accidentally drop the mate on the wooden floor. You hold on to the thermos like a lifeline, fully opened eyes pointing to the floor and then up to your girlfriend again.

“Mierda. Carajo.” Wednesday just stands there unmoving, as you throw yourself to the floor to pick up the yerba mess. The plant stains very bad, very quickly, so you end up (once again) in a rush against time itself to get some wet tissue paper and scrub the floor before it is too late. 

Now, with the headphones resting uncomfortably on your neck and the floor as-clean-as-it's-gonna-get, you take a deep breath and stand in front of the waiting girl. “Hi” After a beat, you lean closer to her and plant a small kiss on her cheek for good measure.

She blinks once, and you understand that’s her way of greeting. “What is that?” With a subtle head movement she points to the mate set now resting undone on your desk. 

“That’s the mate set my dad brought me from Argentina for parents’ weekend. The super cool gift I told you about?” It doesn’t seem to ring a bell. “Come on, I’ll show you how to make the best mates ever”

“Do you even know what time it is?” She asks with a slightly arched eyebrow.

“I have no forking idea, now come on” You guide her to your bathroom, and your makeshift kitchen counter.

.

“You have to put cold water first, so the leaves don’t burn, and then pour the hot water on the little hole we made” You guide Wednesday through the steps until you are only left with the last one. 

“So, I’ll do this, so you don’t gross out too much” You take the first two sips through the straw and immediately spit it out in the sink. She makes no comment, and both of you head out to your bed. The sun is starting to come up.

You get comfortable on top of your quilt and so does Wednesday. You pour the first mate and drink it yourself as an act of mercy. “What brings you here, by the way?”

“I was planning on silently watching you sleep until you woke up, so then we could go to class together, but I see you haven’t slept at all” She says matter of factly. You hand her the mate, but she doesn’t take it, as if waiting for instructions.

“Just try it out, if you don’t like it, no worries. It tastes bitter and it might be too hot, so be careful” She goes to grab it with both hands and you giggle, rambling about an ongoing joke in your family, of newbies using the bombilla as a gearshift.

You get yourself into the rabbit hole that is explaining the social rules of mate in gatherings, and how some people from Argentina and Uruguay drink it as often as coffee, or even more. You fail to notice your girlfriend’s face starting to morph into a frown. When you look up you feel like you messed up big time. 

“Oh god, you hate it. Let me get you some water. Do you want toothpaste?, I have som-” as you’re standing up to get a glass, you are stopped by Wednesday softly grabbing your wrist. Her eyes glint with something as close to fascination as you’ve seen on her. 

“It’s… magnificent. There is not a trail of sweetness, I could even guarantee it’s as bitter as my dark and cold soul” You can’t stop the huge and shining smile that takes over your face.

“So you like it?!” You pour yourself a mate and drink it before leaving the set in your nightstand and jumping up from your bed. “I’m so excited! I haven’t asked principal weems if I can take it to class, but I bet she will have no problem! My mom used to tell me that a good mate is the best companion for studying, it’s been so long since I’ve shared mate with someone!” 

A small smile starts to creep its way onto Wednesday’s face when seeing you so excited about your culture. She turns to look at your direction, still sitting on the edge of your bed. “You are clearly sleep deprived, and I’m certain this drink is going to trigger an insomnia episode if you remain drinking it at such ungodly hours, but-” 

“You’re gonna be my mate buddy?!”

“It’s whatever.” You can almost see a blush covering her cheeks. Almost. “Now, breakfast starts in five minutes, so get ready if you wish to be there on time. And don’t think you’re about to get away with an all-nighter. After lunch you’re getting rest willingly, or I’ll make you”

You roll your eyes playfully and hand her the basket with the set inside. “So bossy..” You give her another peck on the cheek and change into your school uniform in a flash.

.

Bonus: 

Enid finds you and Wednesday sharing mates at the library a few days later, and after insisting that she’s gonna surely love it, she pulls such a grimace when the drink touches her tongue that you almost feel offended. 

You appear the next day with two different sets: one of mate, for you and your girlfriend; and one of tereré for Enid. Your friend likes the sweet and cold version so much better, and from then on asks you very often to prepare it for her.

You also show them and the gang the wonders of dulce de leche, Rogel cake, and every single argentinian tea time good you can get your hands on.

.

A/N: I totally devoured the series, and I'm obsessed, so expect more of Wednesday to come. Comments are greatly appreciated as always, I want to know what you think!

About the "Mate" depicted in this fic: It's a weird kind of infusion (here's a pic for reference)

that seems to be prepared backwards (you have a cup with the herb -yerba mate- to which you pour hot water, opposite from tea I guess), you have to sip through that metal straw -called bombilla- that has a filter, and it's usually drunk in groups or social events, or as a way to replace the caffeine that coffee may provide. It's highly energetic and bitter, although some people add sugar or sweeteners to taste.

The first mate is usually the most bitter one, cause it's filled with the dust of the yerba, so drinking the first mate yourself can sometimes be an act of heroism lol.

I also mentioned "Tereré", which is similar, but (where I live) only drunk in hot weather. It's prepared with cold juice instead of hot water and it's definitely less bitter.

Yerba mate also stains like a bitch, even linolium floors, so if you are to spill some, you have to clean it up quickly before it dries.

By the way, we use mate(s) as a countable AND uncountable noun, so don't come at me about grammar please hahdghfkv

I hope you liked this crash course of mates!

[ropebuny]

Like with the horny "daddy" with red text

It feels like the same level of horny some people have in their day to day lives but haven't taken the time to actually understand or consider what it means. It is the most direct and mundane way of interacting in kink. They feel they are transgressing, but they go for the simplest and least complicated route.

It is a fantasy of power and control, but not exploring what it is, what it means or how it can evolve. Just a half-baked scene that lets them be horny for 10 minutes ignoring how many RACK/SSC rules they would be ignoring. It feels like the equivalent of fast food or snacks in kink. Easy to churn out, no need to consider, just consume it. And they end up creating an environment that lets so many people get away with wrongdoing because "everyone does it".

It is an insane environment a lot of the time, which is what makes coherent and consistent blogs all the more important. A safe harbour and someplace to meet reasonable people.

no this is so well written and you’re sooo right about it all

like at best it’s just some cringey guy thinking he’s being super kinky and horny by saying something like “I’ll touch your butt and then buy you pizza 🫣” “buying her cute lingerie and fucking her in it” type of boring “kink” posts. which is cringe and annoying but usually not extremely harmful

but at worst it’s them enabling a very very dangerous environment by never implicating safe words or rules or consent or ANYTHING in that regard within their kinky posts. and they also never rb warning posts like “what is important in bdsm relationships” “what is consent” “how do safe words work” “how to care for a little” etc. like their blog is just one huge pile of extreme kinky stuff that’s being shared around without anyone ever stopping to think about the consequences of it all. like I bet half of these tumblr doms have no fucking clue what aftercare is or how to properly treat a sub. to them it’s just power and control and making their sub send them nudes and getting to cum and that’s the extent of it. no talk about boundaries or foreplay or anything. like they get horny and want to cum and that’s it. no consideration for anyone else. on that topic of no foreplay or no boundaries, I fucking HATE how normal it is on here to have no boundaries. IM BEGGING YOU TO HAVE BOUNDARIES !!!!!!!! I see young 18 yr olr girls posting about “I have no boundaries :3” like that’s not fucking normal or commendable. boundaries are good !!!!!

and another thing I have somewhat of an issue with. I feel like the word rape has been too normalised and has completely switched out the expression ‘cnc’. and most of these guys post about rape, rarely ever disclosing their post as being cnc. I rarely ever see anyone even tagging their posts as ‘cnc kink’ it’s always just talk about rape. and it just gives me an overall iffy feeling idk if this is even making any sense. like someone followed me today with posts like these and it just feels like it has nothing to do with cnc anymore but it’s just about actual rape

[inchidentally]

please tell me your parasocial theory about the lando effect on his teammates i'll shrivel up like a raisin without it actually

god. I'm gonna try and keep this coherent and not TOO weird. obv this is completely without knowing any of these people personally and it's just me theorizing for fun without any actual private knowledge etc etc !

(I've had to edit the hell out of this bc I don't want to like outright offend anyone since this isn't meant to be super serious at all but I'm mortified at how long it is anyway lol)

so we all know that Lando has always had the whole main character fairytale prince/princess quality that started from taking so incredibly long to finally grow up right up to his version of grown up vacillating between devastating fuckboy to coquette fetish sweetheart. and we all know that Lando is fully aware of how he looks and how he's perceived bc of visible social media presence and interactions and also just being around mirrors. he's stunning and charismatic because he makes no effort to be and there is an aura of destiny and magic around him with whatever he does. but he's always seemed like someone who needs to know what exactly he means to his close friends, mainly guys. in a way that's almost like 'yeah you have a girlfriend but does she accept that I'm ✧Me✧ and not just a Normal Blokey Friend?' or 'will your friends accept that I'm ✧Me✧ or will I have to put up a front?'

the reason Lando's so magnetic to people is because he's a ✧Me✧ but also because he's a ✧Me✧ while being a guy which guys aren't usually secure enough to be ✧Me✧. a lot of guys dress up or play up acting like one but Lando's authentically a ✧Me✧ and not to be classed with guys who are Normal Bloke or Normal Friend. they are very very rare.

to expand on this further and because I have insomnia let's take a walk through our perceptions and occasional facts of fandom observation over the years...

I feel like somewhere in the process of his first few years of F1 Lando went from awkward paddock baby who was probably a fall risk to realizing how incredibly adorable he still was even as a pro racing driver. he was literally everybody's baby (and honestly still kinda is). he was thrown into F1 so young it's not surprising.

I am a diehard carlando fan here so please understand that I'm switching to speaking in real life and not fandom terms (and I prefer fandom terms lol) real life Carlos is 100% hetero to me. my family and friend group are sort of UN levels of diverse and what seems like fruityness in non-American or sometimes non-British men is completely standard for straight dudes outside those countries. straight euro guys in particular flirt and get physical with their bros one way and then have an entirely different type of flirting and physicality with women they're attracted to. I don't think this is the case with Carlos at all but a LOT of these euro dudes can even compartmentalize so well that they're actually homophobic while fully kissing and cuddling with their friends. like I say Carlos doesn't seem at all homophobic but there have definitely been tiny, subtle moments with other drivers or during social media challenges where he's been like 'okay that's far enough for me'. which imo is him drawing boundaries and is totally fair.

AND YET WITH LANDO? Carlos has had a verrrrry hard time classifying Lando up until recently I think. for a while after signing to McLaren it was clear he viewed himself as protector and big brother/uncle to a very skittish and weird child/toddler/pet. then when Lando started to build his F1 personality around Carlos and was able to do some give and take with him, Carlos started to see Lando as a fun little satellite buddy and we got some of their silliest most adorable moments (the squawk laughing and the horseplay etc). but Carlos very much still viewed himself as the superior and Lando was just happy to have someone patient and considerate of him rather than a serious competitor.

to me Carlos and everyone else in F1 shifted how he saw Lando around the time of Daniel showing up on the scene (and Carlos' shock at how upset Lando was when he went to Ferrari). Lando got a LOT more confidence on and off the track from here on and he absolutely saw Daniel as a competitor and gave as good as he got off track too (in a fun way). he was never a satellite of Daniel's like he was with Carlos. he also physically started to grow and appreciate his own beauty and sexuality (not as in his identity but his effect on others sexually). he started dressing more consciously and mixing flirting with cuteness to win people over and play the media. youtuber/streamer Lando began to merge with F1 paddock darling Lando into something new between having Carlos and Daniel as teammates.

I can just tell you right now that a dude like Carlos would have ABsolutely no idea how to classify what Lando was becoming at that point in terms of their friendship. Lando was too pretty and still too small to be considered a Dude and apart from on the race track Lando doesn't have the natural douche-ness of Dudes. but Lando also had an active sex life and women were already crazy for him so he wasn't a child anymore either. since F1 drivers literally for bodily safety reasons can only identify as straight Carlos couldn't even class Lando as a rainbow guy.

personally I think that's when Carlos elevated Lando to Hot Bitch/Great Dude status. Lando can still take roughhousing and stupid jokes but he's also got this intense genderfluid glow that poor straight man brain have a tough time with. so Lando's this still confusing hybrid but one that Carlos accepts and loves.

in such a short time Lando went from notice me senpai over Carlos as a teenager on twitter to showing off how they exclusively hang out outside race weekends and he can breeze into the Ferrari garage like he owns the place. one teammate down :)

obv this whole time Lando has had Max F in his life and I think they've known for a long time that they're the sort of best friends who are also common law married. their gfs have always seemed really good natured about it. (**this will be relevant when Oscar comes up later) before Carlos, Max was very clearly the stronger public personality Lando had latched onto as a kid and stayed that way until about 2020/2021. since then I feel like Max is watching Lando in a kind of proud wiping away a tear and claiming that it's raining way. he was down before he probably knew it :)

honestly I'm not a big fan of Daniel Ricciardo for specific reasons and I've chosen to just edit out what I'd written about him and Lando since I truly don't want to piss anyone off over this pointless post lol. it's enough to say that for all Daniel's cockiness making gay jokes etc I get a lot of joy from the fact that Lando has ended up combining Lewis Hamilton-gender norms are for losers attitude with his own genuine rising stature as a future WDC and basically blew Daniel out of the water in every way. they're absolutely still good buddies but damn, Hot Bitch Lando had Daniel stuttering and staring with how little effort it took for Lando to outshine him, on and off the track. Daniel is usually the one in charge of his F1 relationships but Lando got him fucked. up. and begging.

another teammate down :)

do I even need to go into detail about Oscar . we know so incredibly little about Oscar's real personality yet we fully know that he's been replying to Lando's tweets and watching Lando's content since boarding school in the UK. you can take a tour of just the McLaren youtube content from the 2023 unboxing onward and watch Oscar go from dazed and stumbling over himself to not look a tool in front of Lando to Prema-era humor Oscar being able to banter with Lando.

here's what's different with the Lando/Oscar friendship tho. Oscar came in weirdly grown up for his age bc he'd left home so young and went from boarding school to being set up in his own flat by Mahk Wibbah. he already had a long term girlfriend and after waiting a year for his driver's seat he'd made the extremely ballsy move to publicly decide his own fate in F1. Lando was probably expecting to have a typical rookie on his hands but instead he got someone who's already more emotionally mature and responsible than Lando's other two teammates combined. then Oscar is so incredibly talented that he's pushed Lando to such a massive new level that P3 and P2 and (currently) 4th in the WDC are already losing a bit of their shine. Lando wants the whole thing and in a way he never has up til now. Oscar is a not insignificant part of that.

Lando suddenly has an equal! their age difference is negligible and their competitive level is the same. the fact that Oscar's racing mentality is so vastly different to Lando's is perfect because there'll never be a Lewis/Nico situation. Lando needs to stay within his own head to a certain degree for race weekends and Oscar looks forward to his next opportunity as soon as he's done with one. Oscar even has a much more laid back Max F style sense of humor which means Lando doesn't have to play up and perform as much as he used to for social media shit.

then there was the awful start to the season followed by Lando definitely being shook up by how hot Oscar came in as a rookie. AND YET Oscar has always gone out of his way to celebrate Lando's successes literally no matter how his own performance went. he's never once opted to peace out until needed for media or pictures (or straight up left) after a DNF or finishing poorly. there's this moment from the Dutch GP that breaks my idiot fandom brain bc Lando had just qualified second and Oscar (Q8) is shaking his hand and congratulating him and. idk it feels like one of those 'oh!' moments where Lando realizes Oscar is rooting for him even when they're competing and it's not a one-off nice gesture or bare minimum effort

(which honestly that bare minimum is totally fair in racing and I don't judge drivers who need to lick their wounds, it can take a lot to come out of that adrenaline mindset and be happy for your teammate who is also your competitor).

and that's the thing, Oscar came in already won over by Lando. he simply expects them both to do their jobs well and whatever Lando has to offer outside that is cool with him because Lando is ✧Lando✧. if Lando wants to bring him more into his non-F1 life at some point that would probably be great but Oscar's also got his own stable non-F1 life so it's fine either way! if Lando has other commitments and Oscar needs to step up more with the team then that's fine! I know I've been superlative with this post but like, Lando never needed/needs to do anything at all for Oscar to like him and accept him and root for him. Oscar clearly doesn't feel the need to prove anything to Lando or force the relationship. everyone else is dazzled by Lando or watched him/helped him grow up but Oscar just really Finds Lando Neat and Wants to Be Around Him. he seems to like being bossed around by Lando but he also likes when Lando is being really cool and when Lando is quiet and moody he just waits until Lando wants to be around people again. he's like a cat that proves their devotion to you by remaining in proximity rather than meowing or shoving their face in yours.

so like, part of me feels like Lando saw his new teammate having this whole life(**girlfriend?? but does she accept me as ✧Me✧?) already before even meeting Lando and had no idea how they'd develop a relationship. both Carlos and Daniel had (and still have) very bachelor style lives where a relationship with the current teammate is top priority and everyone else in their life has to deal. work comes first, then work friends, then everything else until the babies are made.

but then Oscar just shows up all content with his grown up life and smiles at Lando all the time and doesn't take anything for granted and respects Lando's space within F1 and McLaren and never complains even about doing things he doesn't like and Lando's like oh! I've already got this one down for the count and I didn't even do anything! nice :)

anyway thank you for asking and I hope this was remotely worth reading aakfgsjgfjgafagla

[givemewallywestorgivemedeath]

Feeling very violent rn so here's a very controversial opinion:

Everything after season one of Young Justice sucked.

Look, I know I'm obsessed with the show but that doesn't mean it's good, it means that I'm too deep into it at this point to get out. There are good moments within the other seasons but in general? They were not good.

I'm sorry. I understand that they wanted to be creative and have a neat narrative and deep lore and all that. And they do! The narrative and lore is extremely deep.

But the plot? The characters??

Season one was an actual functional show that balanced character development, plot and dialogue with world building, lore and messaging.

The other seasons do not do that.

Season two bounced back and forth between like 16 characters. We got some development for some characters but even that was minimal compared to the character development in S1. And this isn't me complaining that the og group wasn't in S2 enough. That's not my issue. I would've loved to focus on a new group and I think that Jaime, Bart, Ed and Gar would've been super cool to focus on. I loved what character development they did have and I craved more.

But the problem? The problem is when you have 16 fucking characters that you are trying to develop and shove into a coherent plot and have actual meaningful scenes. There just wasn't enough focus on S2. Imo, S2 was meh because the characters got left by the wayside. The plot, dialogue, world building, lore and messaging was fine, there just seemed to be a lack of heart/warmth in the show because of the characters. It's hard to get invested.

Then holy shit. S3 introduced more characters. And the plot got more contrived and 'big picture' to the point that it started to abstract. It felt like nothing mattered. There were no stakes, you were just watching things happen. There was 50 fucking things happening an episode and 80% of it was lore/world building. It felt like I was studying for a fictional history exam.

I'm pretty sure the main character in S3 was earth 16. Just the entire universe. Because goddamn. We checked in on almost every living being and EVERYTHING was a plot point. Most of it wasn't even relevant to anything happening in the season. Man it was.... it was bad.

And at that point it just wasn't enjoyable at all to watch. I probably should've stopped watching but at that point the sunk cost fallacy had already kicked in. I knew it could be good. Maybe it could be good again. And people were constantly praising it as cinematic genius so I was like 'okay well maybe I'm missing the point? Maybe you aren't supposed to enjoy shows? Maybe this is fine?'

But season four broke me.

The creators heard that people were frustrated by the lack of character focus and the episodes following 72 characters and the episodes switching between 50 different subplots every episode and their solution? Their solution was to take allllllll the different unconnected plots and, instead of evenly spreading them throughout the season, jam them all into 'arcs'. So you had a bunch of mini seasons consisting of 3-5 episodes dedicated to a cast of ~5-8 characters (some of them new). And each of these episodes had unconnected a plots, b plots and c plots.

THAT IS NOT A SOLUTION

Holy shit that is not a solution.

Not to mention the overarching plot of the season, in which we had no fucking clue what was happening until the final episodes where everything became a speedrun to wrap everything up. We literally had no idea what the main plot was until it was ending.

Good god it was bad. It's bad writing!

I know people liked it and good for them. You should like what you like and you don't have to justify it. But for me it was insanity. I'm sorry I actually don't want a season long subplot where Beast Boy is depressed and sleeps all day. I would be cool with it if it had anything to do with the larger story but, surprisingly, spending five minutes watching Beast Boy sleep every episode didn't make for compelling storytelling.

I'm still not over how we didn't even know who the main villain was until the end of the season. And then all of a sudden he does a villain monologue to tell everyone his evil plan and his motives. Super cool actually. I love it when I have no idea what the stakes are for the majority of a show. It's incredibly good storytelling when you leave the audience in the dark about a major player in the plot for all of the plot. And then doing an info dump evil monologue in the final episodes to rush through the explanation??? Fucking fantastic and not a sign of terrible pacing at all.

I'm just so frustrated. The show isn't about being a show anymore. The show is an entire cinematic universe shoved into 20 something episodes. It's desperate to tell every single story at once, audience, pacing and good writing be damned.

I'm so tired of the constant praising of Greg. His whole 'i don't write endings because life doesn't have endings' and 'i don't write cliffhangers, I just leave things open ended' thing is pretentious bullshit. I'm tired of pretending it's not. A good story has an ending. Stories are not life! Some of the best shows I've ever watched had planned endings. And oh my god. The cliffhanger thing... that's just semantics my guy. Greg you write cliffhangers. You can insist they aren't but I'm going to call a spade a spade.

It's also.... I'm fine with explaining things, in fact I love it because it's an excuse to talk about the stuff I love, and I have a fairly decent knowledge of comic book lore. So, I could not only understand what was happening in the show but I was also super enthusiastic about explaining it to people. But hey Greg? Hey buddy? If 90% of your audience doesn't know what the fuck is going on and needs to be familiar with super specific obscure comic characters from the 70's then you might have a problem.

I think I realized halfway through s4 that the most enjoyment I got from an episode was when an obscure comic character would cameo in it. But then I realized that a) they generally weren't explained at all and b) 50% of the time they weren't just hanging out in the background and they were vital to the plot. So to understand who the fuck they were and what the fuck was happening you had to be familiar with... well all of DC comics actually.

Anyway this rant is getting long and unhinged and I don't think there's a point so I'm going to cut myself off even though I have so much more to say on the topic. I think my general point is just that I didn't enjoy watching the later seasons and it's chill if you did and we should all respect each other's opinions ✌️

[leogichidaa]

Bellatrix, to Harry: Aren’t you here to avenge my dear cousin? Just remember, no matter what else, I’ll always be the one who’s actually Sirius’s family, not you.

Bellatrix later, that very scene, to Voldemort: I was occupied with fighting the Animagus Black

Like, that epithet is ridiculous and also, there is genuinely no other Black she could’ve been referring to, she could’ve just said his last name. The only living direct relatives that Sirius has are married women who took their husbands’ names and all the other men are dead (plus, Sirius is the only Black in the Order at that point, there’s no other Black who Bellatrix plausibly could’ve been fighting). I get it’s likely JKR going “the Black family has no attachment to one another” but it’s still a freaking ridiculous way to refer to Sirius.

I have a lot of disjointed, half-coherent thoughts about this. There's this tension, right, of "that's not my family", but also they are. It's the weird tension of Walburga burning Sirius' name of the tapestry but apparently not disinheriting him. Of Sirius running away from home and then coming back. The permanent sticking charms. You're permanently stuck with me. I'm permanently stuck with you.

And there's something about Bellatrix, who has just killed her cousin and is now being confronted by this kid who in many ways represents the very thing that she lost her cousin to, highlighting her relationship to Sirius. And then asking Harry "did you love him?" and framing that as like, a super childish thing. Aww, how silly and babyish of you to love Sirius. You know? Do you understand what I'm poorly articulating?

But as soon as Voldemort shows up, Sirius is not her cousin anymore, no sir. "The Animagus Black". Which, yes, is a very weird way to refer to anyone ever. But it's also like...the most detached and dehumanizing way to refer to him. Because Sirius isn't her family.

Except he was her family two minutes ago. When she was taunting Harry for loving Sirius. After she killed him.

The first time she's seen Sirius in decades, they're so focused on their duel they don't notice Dumbledore come into the room, Sirius laughs at her, she manages to get a curse in, and then he's gone forever. My dear cousin.