#this is probably one of the most beautiful scenes in this drama

[duahauuoplanh]

It took me a long time to realize this, when it’s fate, there are no coincidences. Your fate is determined by the choices you make, but there are times, your fate chooses you. Things that are bound to happen, are taking place even in this moment. I was truck with a sad premonition that this will be short lived, but I decided to love the fate that chose me.

[alexiroflife]

being married to gojo as an actress while playing the role of a villain...

au, fluff, some suggestive themes, cheating themes

🌟🌟🌟

both you, satoru, and probably the rest of the world can confidently say that satoru is your biggest fan. while he is fully successful within his own career, he can not help but fawn over your achievements like a ten year old boy with one of your movie posters hung up in his room

the world does not associate either of you without the other. yes, you have individually made an outstanding name for yourself within the television and theater industry, but your fans find the two of you so adorable, so iconic that it’s impossible to imagine you without satoru gojo and satoru gojo without you

viewers are starstruck when you arrive to your film premiers with satoru on your arm, beaming pridefully as though it’s his first time walking the red carpet when that’s hardly true. you’re beautiful, and everyone knows it. the second your eyes meet a camera along with satoru’s striking blue ones, his hand wrapped snugly around your waist and your faces adorned with dazzling smiles, photographers go wild. even more so when satoru blatantly grabs your face and kisses you all over, feeding your fan pages’ content as well as his desire to constantly shower you in affection

and when it’s not at premieres, satoru’s supporting you during tours, press conferences, galas, meet and greets, sitting backstage or in the front row of the crowd or at times by your side as though he can’t bear to be away from you. when you’re being showered in appreciation, he’s flicking thousands of pictures, capturing the way you interact with your adoring admirers

satoru's grown rather used to the array of roles you have played. he's seen you in rom-coms, dramas, thrillers, actions, you name it, and though he doesn't necessarily get jealous when you have to kiss someone on screen anymore, he doesn't always appreciate some of the intimate scenes you do. despite so, he trusts you. he knows it's your job and that none of it is real, and above all, he knows the faces you make when you're truly experiencing pleasure. while you're an amazing actor, those faces you make on screen could never begin to compare to the ones he draws out of you

ever the arrogant man, however, satoru always makes it a point to remind you of who makes you feel good- who has you crossing your legs under the table as you meet with colleagues over the computer, his fingers working their way in and out of your sopping cunt off camera as you try your damndest to keep a straight face while your entire lower half is squirming- who makes a point to fuck you over the dresser of your trailer in between shoots after having brought you some coffee to help keep your energy high, rambling on about how one of the tech assistants had been looking at you for too long- who, at any event possible, will never fail to lay you back on the seat of your limo before even stepping outside, scrunching up your obscenely priced gown to eat you out as he gazes up at you over your legs

"you're so gorgeous, pretty. my pretty girl," "how lucky am i to be the only one who gets to see you like this, hm?" "fuck, baby, they have no fuckin' idea how good you feel"

even with his habits, satoru will never turn his nose up at any role you play simply because you're far too talented and simultaneously devoted to him for him to ever feel put off by your occupation. besides, he's managed to bag one of the most famous actors in the world. he truly does not think he has anything to worry about when it comes to you

satoru finds himself rather surprised, yet excited nonetheless, when he hears that you are to be playing a dislikable character in the upcoming film of the summer. you warn him that it's drastically different, that you'll be tapping into a morally poor side of yourself for this role that you have never delved into, nor really favored before

"pretty, you'll do amazing. trust me. do i get to watch you be mean to other guys? do you get to beat anyone's ass? honestly, that sounds like a dream come true" "i mean, yeah, but toru it's more than that. my character is actually a bitch. an unfaithful, abusive one. i don't know how i'm gonna do that..."

satoru knows that behind all the glitz, glamor, and fame, the occupation of an actor can be incredibly emotionally and physically taxing. you don't tell him much more about the role before rehearsals and filming starts, but he can tell over time that you're struggling with this particular film. simply because you're just too kind of a person despite how large your presence is

well into the filming process, he decides to visit you on set to serve as some extra emotional support. he's watching from behind the cameras intently as you go through a scene that's way more intense than he had previously expected, and his jaw practically drops as he watches the scene play out before him

your character is being confronted by her husband about her infidelity, and all the while as your acting partner screams at you in tears to beg you for some remorse, you lay back on a sofa with a cigarette pinched between your fingers, face completely dull and apathetic

"how could you do this to me?! to us? why won't you look at me! I say something!"

"whatever i say won't change the fact that i fucked someone else."

"...do you even care? do you care that you've ruined our relationship?"

"let's be real, there was no relationship to begin with."

"w-what do you mean?"

you stand, stubbing your cigarette into a mug, and walk over to your sniveling scene partner. the camera zooms on your face, your dead eyes, your angled brows. "i never loved you. don't you get it? you're just a pet, and you know it. so don't go crying to me about breaking something that was never promised"

satoru's eyes are wide, completely enraptured as though this scene is a real moment he is witnessing from afar. your fake husband he breaks down, dropping to his knees and clinging to you, but you curl your lips in disgust.

"get the fuck off me," you hiss, shoving him rather aggressively away. he falls, sobbing. "pathetic piece of shit."

you go to turn away, but stop and stumble. immediately you break, and gone is the merciless woman that was acting before the crew seconds ago. the light returns to your eyes as you cover your mouth in embarrassment, looking up.

"sorry, i forgot my next block," you say sweetly, timidly. "how was that?"

"perfect! let's pick up from when you turn away. once you say that last line, you-"

satoru is baffled, the director's notes falling into muffled white noise as he stares at you. he's never seen you in such a position before, one that has him questioning everything about you. and though you claimed to have a hard time with it, you were doing fucking phenomenal

he sees now what you mean about your character being... well, a horrible person for lack of a better term. he doesn't even recognize you, and he's sure your fans are going to have a field day when this film comes out. you're being shown in a drastically different light from your heroine and emotionally relatable love interest positions, and it will surely be a sight for the world to see.

during your break, you walk up to satoru tiredly and burrow your face into his chest. he wraps you up immediately, babbling about how insane you were in your scene. you look up at him with those big (e/c) eyes as he runs his hand over the back of your head.

"you think so?"

"baby, my jaw was dropped the entire time. i don't even know how you did that. you played that a little too well."

he's joking, but you still make a face of slight fear, as though you're scared of offending him. "you think it's too much?"

"no- it's a lot, but no- it's perfect. it's bold, and you do it so well."

"it doesn't make you uncomfortable?"

"why would it make me uncomfortable, pretty? i know you're acting, and it's not like you'd ever cheat on me let alone act like that," he tilts his head as a remorseful look flashes through your eyes. "are you uncomfortable?"

"i don't know... i'm just scared of how people will react... mostly because i could never picture saying this stuff to you, and i've had to do a lot of exercises to get into this toxic mindset that just... eugh. trust me, you haven't even seen the half of it."

"have you been able to take long enough breaks?"

"kinda..."

"alright, let's go chill in your trailer 'til your next call. i don't want you stressing your pretty little head about this, princess. you're doing amazing and remember, it's just a movie."

and yes, it's just a movie. a movie that has satoru twitching in his seat during the premiere at how uncomfortably awful you're acting the entire time in the film. by now, you've eased into the feel of things and are rather proud of the work you''ve done, but also happy that it's all over. you hold satoru's hand tight during some of the worst scenes, sneaking glances at him as the screen flickers intensely over his glassy eyes. you can tell he's rather moved by it all, by seeing you in such a position, and you chew harshly on the inside of your lip

when the lights come up, you're given a standing ovation initiated of course by your rather emotional husband, but in his defense, the entire room has tears in their eyes as well. satoru's clapping harshly, and you try to hide your face as grateful tears spring in your eyes, grateful for this opportunity, for your accomplishments, for the support that surrounds you

satoru wraps you in a huge hug and whispers in your ear "don't ever do what you just did in that movie to me," he whimpers, and you laugh loudly because both of you know the thought is inconceivable. "you did so so good, baby. m'so proud of how far you've come"

that night, you shower each other with love. you're wrapped up in each other's limbs, your lips meeting every part of his skin to remind him that you are still you despite the realism of the character you played, and that satoru will always be your one and only you devote yourself faithfully to for the rest of your life. when the two of you have spent yourselves, satoru holds you in the moonlit darkness of your bedroom, arms wrapped around you from behind with your back to his chest. he kisses your shoulder softly, then your cheek

"you really liked the movie, toru?" you whisper. "i loved it," he mumbles into your skin. "but, god, i thought i was gonna have a heart attack almost fifty times and that one scene with you at the bar didn't help." "i knew you were gonna say something about that!" "i can't help it, baby, you were just so heartless and scary," he pouts

[lady-buggerinton]

My Top Five Polin Scenes in Part One (and why!)

My darling gossipers, so far this show is making literally all of my hopeless romantic dreams for this couple come true and who knows what kind of angst and drama were in for in part two, so before things gets too real I just wanted to go into (too much) depth on my favorite scenes and a few swoon-worthy details from part one! *whips reigns on carriage* shall we?

5. Drawing Room Lesson/Journal

Pen's brain: TOUCH ALERT! HIS HAND IS ON MY BACK.

This scene is so best friend coded with the way they are bantering and flirting the whole time. There's an adorable contrast between Penelope's fear of being discovered and Colin being like it's chill!(when in fact it is not Chill because they get interrupted after 5 minutes of gazing into each others eyes)

He just clearly wanted to be completely alone and behind closed doors platonically with his very beautiful friend (who looks like an angel in this scene) to pretend they are courting. Nothing suspicious about that!

I love how he's so into the lesson to the point that he has set out the lemonade as a prop and brought her to Bridgerton house in the first place specifically because she said it was where she was most comfortable (previously, but he's doing his best, and probably hoping she will become comfortable again, ouch)

Colin being the "dashing suitor" for her to flirt with (loser) and when she's resistant to fake flirting with him he hits her with the, "you don't have to be embarrassed, you know me!" trying to put her at ease. And he succeeds! Penelope is so comfortable during this scene when she's opening up about how it's hard for her to get her personality across, it's so sweet and honest.

And this is when the ROMANCING really starts, I love how it's Penelope who takes the lead here. mostly by accident, but the poor man is still left in shambles.

I do kind of wish for this scene they had gone with a more back and forth flirting moment, and seen them both get a little taste of how overtly flirting with each other would feel rather than her little poetic moment, but it was sweet to see her expose a corner of her feelings for him and watching him get a tad flustered at the compliment.

Ok, while it was rather uncool of her to read his journal, I love this part so much. Because I am no better, I would 100 percent do this given the chance. Her examining the space where he spends time, her running her hand over his pirate coat, (who wouldn't) the quiet yearning of that action. As a snoop myself, this was wish fulfillment.

Penelope being hit with a confusing mix of jealousy and intrigue by the contents of the journal entry, the way she stops reading for just a second and then gives in and devours his writing, not being able to hold back from getting inside his head. Don't think about how she probably missed his letters.

Colin's anger here is warranted, and I liked how he didn't come across as aggro-angry Colin from the books but is still justifiably upset that his privacy has been violated. He is likely aware that there are certain DETAILS he wouldn't want her to be reading, like how he's a lonely lonely sad little man trying to be rakish and roguish because his beautiful platonic friend isn't writing him back and encouraging him like she usually does.

Can I just mention that bandaging a wound is an excellent trope and it's such a good romancing vehicle: the care, the tenderness, the touching! the GRUMPINESS! But my favorite thing about the wound bandaging is his reaction to her complimenting his work, of which he hasn't shown ANYONE. He's just so shocked that she likes it, and clearly starved for her encouragement/anyone to be interested in his travels.

I think its also worth noting that this is THE moment that Colin thinks back to when he's considering activating his chaos tendencies by rolling up to the red ball to interrupt her proposal, so I'm gonna interpret that as him recalling his first realization/admittance to himself that he has feelings for her beyond friendship.

It wouldn't surprise me since it is after this moment that we see the hints of jealousy start to manifest at the full moon ball (looking for her, asking her if she likes a suitor, he's not subtle with it). Can't blame him, he was just touched with intimacy and care, and told his creative outlet is well-written, he is being ROMANCED to the max and he can't handle it.

We also have our first "please" as Pen asks to help, and as we will see, these two can't say no to each other once the magic word is spoken! I hope this theme makes a comeback in part two (please please please)

4. Market Scene

ok, besides a semi-silly looking wig on Colin (reshoots) this scene is first of all, so beautiful.

SHE IS SO FINE IN THIS SCENE I CAN'T EVEN THINK. She looks like a preraphaelite painting and I'm gnawing at the bars of my enclosure.

I literally kept saying "wow" out loud. It actually makes the scene very silly to me because she keeps talking about how she'll never snag a husband and I'm over here on one knee begging for a chance.

If Penelope has been Colin's cheerleader and #1 supporter for their whole friendship, this is where that flips. This scene is all about Pen feeling dejected about her prospects and Colin trying to lift her spirits -basically by saying she doesn't need to work on anything because he already likes her so much without her doing anything but I digress!

There is nothing hotter than your crush talking about a shared memory! Literally nothing! You can see her absolutely light up here when he talks about their first meeting like "I can't believe he remembered" and "Shit, I'm trying to not be in love" and it makes me ache for her.

I am very sad we didn't get a meet cute flashback (hello romcom!!) but this was the next best thing. He's also definitely still in Rake Mode with the way he is being charming and flirty, but there is a core of genuine feeling here as he is trying to get her find her confidence and be more like the non-self conscious children they once were. I believe a lot of the rift between them was directly because she had such strong feelings for him and couldn't just connect with him as friends due to the pedestal she put him on, this scene shows that without that as a barrier, they are able to connect much more naturally.

"Living for the estimation of others is a trap, once you break free the world opens up," he says, and he's starting to realize this idea but hasn't quite put it into practice. I think seeing Penelope struggling to be something she's not, just like he is, shows him how it's not working for either of them. This I think kickstarts his self-reflection and eventual rejection of external pressures later on, leaving him open to pursue other passions.

Ok but what I LOVE most in this scene is his subtle digging for information about her that she isn't forthcoming with. He asks her why she wants a husband and where she feels most comfortable, peppering her with questions and also giving her zero personal space. He's very curious about her and what is going on inside, but she's not exactly open with him at this point, giving short and simple answers.

She's genuinely not used to someone asking her this many questions about herself, receiving this kind of devoted attention, and she clearly doesn't know quite how to respond. In fact, the dynamic has always been reversed, where she was encouraging and inquiring about him, so this switch is just excellent. there have been little moments throughout the series where he asks about her and she always seems to deflect to talking more about him, so it's nice to see this shift.

Also fun detail, the grecian statues behind them are a little nod to the eros and psyche vibes of the scene as cupid is trying to find a match for his psyche, but is slowly beginning to fall for her, his curiosity the first step towards total downfall.

When he asks about Eloise is where Pen just completely shuts down and says she has to leave, and the "before we are noticed" with the little smile? I have fallen in love. She's clearly using that as an excuse to dodge the question, and it is almost an inside joke, sadly. As if she's saying "No one would believe you are courting me anyway haha". And yet he's clearly bummed she's leaving, he was having such a good time, and she leaves him hanging, wanting to know more. I also absolutely love the Rae side eye, lethal!

3. Candy Tent

Post-kiss insanity is on full display here. The way she beckons him with a sexy head tilt and he came running, the way his hands give away his nervousness and his eyes keep locking on her helplessly. Just FULL ON crush mode. The soft "How are you?" he missed her!

Also outfits are incredible here, the pearls in the hair, the painted vest, Colin inventing the color brown, it's a rococo dream. The plushy pink of the tent, the ambiance, everything is just in a word: sumptuous? never used that but it feels right here.

Pen's giddiness here is just adorable, she's experiencing blatant interest for the first time and I couldn't be happier for her. But someone else is very peeved, indeed. He's trying to play the part of supportive friend while also just kind of feeling a lot of "confounding feelings"

The way he is trying to be so casual and attempting to keep up his swagger, but his true feelings are showing through BAD kind of harkens back to how Pen would interact with Colin in s1 and 2, with barely contained affection and hope. The script has been FLIPPED and it feels so good!!

I literally squeal every time he asks her if she's formed an attachment to Debling, this is the shit I signed up for!! Her saying Debling is not "unpleasant to gaze upon" and watching Colin just completely glitch out with jealousy. He's like AND WHAT ABOUT ME! Must be frustrating to be the most eligible bachelor of the season, and yet your very beautiful crush friend is complementing another man on his looks. When your crush expresses interest in someone it can be truly insanity inducing, so I feel for him here.

Pen is oblivious completely, she doesn't think any of what she is saying is negatively affecting him, in fact she thinks this news will make him happy! His lessons worked, she didn't care about being perceived and it is having the desired affect! and yet, he's miserable. Mission accomplished unsuccessfully if you will.

He does ALMOST a good job of hiding his feelings, but if Pen were not completely convinced he couldn't have feelings for her, I think she would've picked up on the vibes here. He's way less enthusiastic about the lessons, and is giving fairly curt responses, when before he was yapping on about being yourself and such.

Then of course the blatant staring at her mouth, being the yearning sort of man he is and likely recalling their kiss in detail, reminder it's been at least a week since. She's romancing him without even trying. It also makes sense for "food motivated" Colin to have Penelope + cake equals critical override of his facial expressions and his literally standing there slack-jawed with lust.

His soft "good luck", when she leaves and the fact that he doesn't mean it AT ALL.

I've seen it talked about, but it makes a lot of sense that Penelope wasn't as affected by the kiss as he was. I'm sure she enjoyed it, but for her the kiss was an end (more on that later) and for him it was the moment he admitted his feelings (which were already growing slowly). so it makes sense the yearning is very colin-sided in this scene.

Apart from the yearning, it's also just sweet to see them in cahoots and discussing this development with Debling like its a little group project, and its the perfect scene to show Down Bad Colin, and I love it. She also clearly wants him to share with her in her success, still wanting to be close to him in any way she can, which if I think about too much I'll cry.

Bonus points for him eating the cake later on, such an intimate detail, he just wants to be close to her in any way he can. CRIMINAL! ARREST HIM!

2. First kiss/Dream Sequence

Ok I'm combining these scenes because they happen back to back and sort of like a mirror of each other, sue me. This first kiss scene is, as Whistledown says, RECKLESS. It's nonsensical, it's desperate, and it's beautiful.

This scene has only improved upon rewatches, it really has everything. Best kiss scene on Bridgerton and possibly in anything ever? no doubt no doubt?

The silly back and forth on the "You're not going to die" and the way she doesn't back down when he seems to get embarrassed, but instead says what? The Magic Word! "Please" she says, which of course is both of their activation word. His expressions here definitely mirror the book, where as soon as she asks him to kiss her, he's a bit taken aback by how much he realizes he wants to already.

This is such a low moment for Penelope, and it's one parts embarrassing and two parts brave of her to ask him to kiss her. In her position, she doesn't even have her pride left, so why not ask the boy you love to kiss you? nothing will come of it anyway, and he probably won't even do it, so why not ask? And what are friends for!

then the moment comes, and the music swells, as does the tension as he closes the distance between them, her shocked face and shallow breaths as she realizes its actually going to happen, the way he lifts her face to his with his hand under her chin. It's just pure romance. and this thing between them, this space that has never been crossed, is being crossed, and it feels insane. reckless. intimate!!

What I love is the shot that focuses on his face after they deepen the kiss, he's intent and confused by how good this feels, how little like kindness this is for him as soon as their lips touch. Like we will see later, he just kind of mind-blanks and forgets what is happening.

Whatever he thought they were has just crumbled with this kiss, and he leans his forehead against hers, no awkwardness when there is such tenderness. which is why he's so shook when she whispers "thank you", and rushes off. he's like "wait why is she thanking me? where am I? weren't we doing something here?" The hopeful strings as it focuses on his dumbstruck face, the earth literally shifting under his feet in that moment. UNREAL.

THE DREAM: I won't say a lot about the dream sequence but I just had to throw it in here because it shows how aligned they are romantically. They are both HUGE romantics, and he has orchestrated this sort of do-over kiss where he's really going for it and proving to her that he wants this too, he wants her. And she's enjoying herself, clearly, which we know is something Colin wants more than anything. It's a great way to show his inner feelings with the lack of an inner monologue that a book brings. And this is clearly a sort of parody of Bridgerton itself, or at least the books. It's over the top, a little silly, and exactly what we all want to see.

This dream also isn't just ripping off clothes, it's emotional, a key element is him expressing how he's been thinking about her, consumed by her. This kiss also isn't as innocent and patient as the first kiss, and it's full of Reciprocation, she can't stop thinking about him either. AND NEITHER CAN I!!!

Both of these kiss scenes also set up our contrasting feelings, where Pen views their first kiss as an end of a dream, a bittersweet act to finally let go off him, the dream of him. And then his dream shows the opposite, how she's ignited something in him that begins his dream of her, awake and asleep. Dream-swap! Also the hand on the wall behind her to catch her from hitting the wall. no comment.

1. Carriage Scene

Yeah like what can I say! It's incredible! I honestly have no idea how they can top this scene, but honestly if this is the best love scene they share in the season I am 10000% content. All of my little qualms with how they did the season melt away when I watch this scene because this was what was crucial to nail and they NAILED IT. TO THE WALL BABY. YAY.

And how did he gain access to the carriage (and Penelope)?? by saying please!! we love the magic word!! I do like the confession a lot, especially the "what if I did have feelings for you?" and the way he gets to his KNEES, a truly inspired moment.

How he completely dies inside when she says they are friends, and still accepts it with grace. There were SO many obstacles to him expressing his feelings to her this night, and he just red rovered each one, and we are all very grateful.

Something about this scene is just built different, I like a lot of the love scenes in the show, but this one has some kind of secret ingredient that we didn't know we'd been missing. Maybe its the location, the context, the way they are just grasping at each other desperately (which if you think about how Penelope thought this was a one time thing in the books and she wanted to make the most of it, actually don't think about that)

He's also just so sweet about it, he's not angry, or insistent, he's just honest and intent. and she's just bewildered and INTO IT.

The lightning is gorgeous, the way it looks like Penelope is catching on fire and glowing. the catharsis, the giving into passion. The way she smiles like her dreams are coming true (because they are) before he just completely attacks her. What else can I say but EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

so many of the kisses are so tender and gentle, and they just build and build and build in intensity as they get lost in each other.

on a more horny note, so many moments here actually make me physically roll my eyes back in my head with how insane they make me. The desperate boob grab, the consensual nod, the way his hand slips under her dress, they were truly so insane for this. something tells me they knew I've waited literal years for this, so they knew they had to make it good.

Someone said Nicola should get an Emmy nom for moans, and she should, somehow they don't come across as cartoonish at all, and it doesn't take me out of the scene like some "noise making" does in these types of scenes. and for the record I'm not jealous at all, of either of them. in fact, no sooner did my head hit the pillow that I was met with complete and total darkness....not even a dream....

Like everything I could say has already been said, but it was so much better than I thought it was going to be, blew my expectations out of the water and DELIVERED. and DEVOURED. and RUINED ME. AND I AM VERY GRATEFUL.

Anyway that's all, I'm very afraid for part two so I needed some escapism, why am I already nostalgic for the good ol' times when Polin was happy for 6 minutes. thanks for reading! <3

[sirfrogsworth]

These folks watched a whole ass movie not realizing the main character was transgender and it was a 2 second kiss between men that made them lose their ever-loving minds.

It's amazing to me that if it weren't for those 2 seconds, many of these folks would have given this movie a 4 or 5 star review. But two seconds of the most vanilla, non-sexy, yet genuine and loving kiss somehow ruined every moment of enjoyment the previous 90 minutes brought them.

Imagine if they realized the trans allegory. I wish I had a way to tell them. I wish I had a way to make them realize they related to a trans character. That they rooted for them. That they accidentally empathized with a trans story.

This was a beautiful movie. In every sense. I really hope between this and Spider-Verse, we can have a moratorium on every 3D animated movie using this style of character design.

It's time to let go of the rubber toy look.

I love Toy Story, but its success kind of doomed 3D animation to never take any risks. I thought maybe it was just a limitation of the medium, and perhaps it was for a time... but after seeing Love Death + Robots and Arcane...

I realized they can make 3D animation look however the hell they want now.

The rubber people were just risk avoidance.

"That's what people are used to and so we're sticking with it."

But the real beauty of Nimona was the story. I won't spoil it but the plot is pretty much, "If you get to know a trans person, you probably won't hate them anymore."

Not knowing any trans people is one of the biggest factors in anti-trans bigotry. And so this movie uses allegory to let an audience get to know a trans person. And you get to experience someone slowly start to understand what it is to be trans from an outside perspective.

It's sad that will probably be lost on those folks above because all they will remember is the kiss. Seriously, it was such a harmless, mundane, blink-and-you-miss-it kiss. But I'm hoping that others will take the lesson of this movie to heart. That you should get to know people before you judge them.

Part of me does wish we could tell trans stories without allegory. That we could just have overt trans characters. But I think this is the best representation possible right now.

It's crazy that Supergirl was one of the bravest shows as far as modern trans representation. It wasn't an edgy HBO drama trying to push boundaries. It was a family-friendly superhero show and they were just like, "Here is a transgender woman with superpowers and it's fine." And I loved that it was part of the character but it wasn't all the character was. Though I think they just missed the manufactured "moral panic" window where that choice would have been extremely controversial causing boycotts of Warner Bros. and whatnot.

My only complaint about Nimona was a small penis joke. It went by very quickly and many may even miss it. But I was surprised to see it in this movie in particular. Especially since those jokes can have collateral damage toward trans folks. With all of the positive messages, wasting a joke on body shaming was a tad disappointing. I mean, it was a fairly lighthearted "Is it cold in here?" joke. I don't want to make it sound worse than it was. But it still registered on my Richter scale of things that bother me.

Anyway, I wholeheartedly give Nimona a 5 out of 5. It helped me understand my friends on a deeper level and it was warm and funny and entertaining. There was a scene at the end that was so beautiful and heart-wrenching and I was crying my eyes out. The animation and the symbolism and the acting were just so perfect.

It's a shame Disney tried to kill this movie. But I am so glad it was allowed to exist despite that.

[emberuby]

in your arms forever — chapter two. | p.js

chapter one | series masterlist | chapter three.

pairing: park jongseong x fem reader

chapter summary: you fully accepted your love for jay, and you two lived in quiet bliss in the background of your family drama. your love did not falter even when your dear sister came to visit you and tell you what a danger you put yourself in by falling for him. little did karina know, the danger never lied with jay but instead with his corrupt staff. a horrible and dangerous revelation will make jay question your entire relationship.

warnings: somnophilia, oral (m and f receiving), unprotected sex, creampie, mentions of semi-public sex, vaginal sex, jay is insanely horny all the time, heavy breeding kink, dark content, brief depiction of sexual harassment, heavy angst, betrayal, some fluff in the beginning, toxic and possessive jay, violent content, blood, murder, blood covered sex, hard dom! jay, sub! reader, mentions of body weight.

taglist: @nshmrarki, @strxwbloody, @anittamaxwynnn, @heeheeyeoiizz01, @star4rin, @yohanabanana, @lilyuwon, @delvziion, @tinyteezer, @partiallyderived, @liebe-love, @honeybunnee, @tmtxtf

note: yes the title of this fic is based on a shower sex scene, what about it? anyway, i'm glad i was finally able to get this done. i will be taking a break until the third and last chapter to write a few wips i wanted to work on, but the third chapter and epilogue is already mostly mapped out. ~ feedback is greatly encouraged and always feel free to ask questions ^^

wc: 14k

That night, you slept peacefully and dreamt of your future with Jay. While in reality, your future was nowhere near as certain, in your fantasy world, the two of you moved into a smaller estate outside the city, where it was quiet, natural and felt like home. 

You were looking out the window, and you saw two children running around in the yard playing tag. The taller one was a girl, who looked so much like Jay, and the shorter one, who looked like he had just barely begun walking, still resembled his father more than he did you. You found that amusing, just how strong Jay’s genes were that your children looked barely like you. You wouldn’t mind it though, considering you thought of him as one of the most beautiful creatures to ever grace your life. 

Just like that, your fantasy began to shift. You were transported to the dining table, a glass of pink champagne in your hand, but just as you were about to take a sip, your husband grabbed it out of your grasp and spilt the contents of it into the sink. His eyes darkened and he furrowed his brows. He threw the glass onto the ground and you heard the sound of it shattering erupt on the wooden floors. 

You winced as you felt a shard of glass slice you on the shoulder and you began bleeding out. Doubling over, you grasped your shoulder, letting out a sob of pain. Jay immediately bent down and cradled your head. “I’m so sorry, my love. Fuck. I’m so fucking sorry. Please, please let me make it okay. Please forgive me.” He was sobbing now, holding onto you so tightly you began to feel dizzy.

Your fantasy faded away as you slowly regained consciousness. At first, you were highly confused about what the wet feeling was on your inner thighs. You felt soft but strong hands gripping your flesh, spreading your legs open. The figure started gently lapping at your clit with his clit and it felt like bliss all over again. Your mouth flew open before your eyes could, and you gasped as you felt the pre-orgasm tingles running up your spine. 

Your pussy was sensitive from last night, so when your eyes fluttered open to see Jay leaning over your cunt and eyes boring into you, you whined pathetically, “B-Baby…Please, I-I’m really…really sensitive.”

Jay halted his movements but didn’t stand up, instead smirking at you and peppering a few kisses onto your inner thighs, “I know I should probably pace myself, but you’re so irresistible. I couldn’t help it, after I got a taste of your pussy last night it’s all I’ve been thinking of.”

Your face heated up at his crude words, and you put your palms over your face to hide your embarrassment, “Don’t say things like that, Jay.”

Jay chuckled and released one of his hands from your hips and intertwined his fingers with yours, “No need to be shy. I’m just being honest, and communication is everything in a marriage, right?”

A marriage. So that’s what you two are now. You were a real couple. It only made sense. You loved each other and you were wearing his ring. I mean, for fuck’s sake, he almost got you pregnant last night, so it didn’t make sense for you to deny it any longer. You were Park Jongseong’s wife now. 

“Yes, you are,” you heard Jay whisper. Your eyebrows raised in surprise, and he grinned at your adorable reaction, “I guess you didn’t mean to speak your thoughts out loud.” 

You shook your head, “I’m just trying to process all of this. It’s a lot.”

Jay hummed in response, rubbing his thumb over your hand. You felt comfortable just being like that until Jay abruptly tightened his grip on your thigh and plunged his tongue back into your sopping wet cunt. Your mouth flew open again and you arched your back off the mattress, your head becoming light and dizzy. Your whole body ached, especially your cunt

Mixed in with your moans of pleasure were sobs from how overwhelmed you were, “Baby…Jay, please…p-please slow down,” your hand reached down to grip at his hair, hoping to maybe control his movements. That didn’t work though, as Jay interpreted it as a sign to go even deeper. He inserted two fingers into your sopping hole and continued licking your clit, incredibly precise with his movements.  

The pleasure was getting to your head and you began fluttering your eyes closed. You felt a harsh sting to your left thigh as Jay spanked it, and you screeched.

“No, open your eyes,” he warned. He went deeper into your pussy with his fingers, and you became flustered at the wet noises your cunt was making every time he’d entered you.

You refused, closing your eyes even tighter, feeling your eyes well up with tears, “I-It’s t-too…,” you paused to breathe, “It’s too much!” You yelped when he curled his fingers inside you, hitting your sensitive spot.

You felt another harsh slap on your thigh, making you wince. He said in a threatening tone, “Open your eyes and watch yourself cum in my mouth. I’m not asking.”

You weakly opened your eyes and were allured by how dark and mesmerising his expression was. While you were struggling to compose yourself, Jay looked as if he was just doing his job, and he was a professional at it. It made you fantasise about what it would be like to suck his cock, and if he’d be so dishevelled as you were right now.

The feeling of his tongue and fingers inside you was becoming mind-breaking and you felt like you were going to ascend. 

Jay enjoyed the knowledge of his effect on your body. To be fair, you were incredibly sore from yesterday, your body adorned with purple love bites he left on you and your voice hoarse from the noises of pleasure. You were bound to be more reactive because of your exhaustion. With that being said, he loved how little effort it took him for you to be lying beneath him like this, withering like a leaf, glistening with sweat and glowing from the inside out. 

You felt the pressure begin to rise in your tummy, knowing that at any moment you would fall over the edge. 

“You’re so gorgeous,” Jay beamed.

“Baby, I’m go-going to…c-cum,” you cried out, much to Jay’s approval. He didn’t say anything, instead quickening the pace of his fingers and tongue. You could only see the top of his head now, as he was bent over and eating you out as a man stared. 

You saw specks of white as your climax washed over you, and your hands were clawing at the pillows lying underneath your head. The fat teardrops were streaming down your face and your jaw became unhinged as you cried out, “Fuck, Jay! B-Baby…Please d-don’t stop.”

He fingered you through your orgasm, helping you come down from it by gradually lowering his pace, “You’re so beautiful when you cum. I should keep you in my bed forever,” he was facing you now and his mouth was glistening with your arousal.  

Your chest rose and fell as you struggled to catch your breath, “We should be more productive in the mornings, Jay."

“How was that not productive? I mean, we have an heir to make,” his eyebrows quirked up and his lips curled in a mischievous smile. 

“I don’t know what school you went to, but eating me out isn’t going to get me pregnant.”

He was now lying beside you, his hand pulling up the covers to help warm you up, “Haven’t you heard? The semen is stored in the spit.”

“That is an absolutely batshit crazy thing to say at nine in the morning,” you threw a pillow at his face. He erupted in a fit of laughter and leaned down to pepper kisses on your cheeks, making you giggle and squirm. 

“It’s noon, my love. You were out of it for a while.”

Your eyes flew open in shock. That means you’ve been asleep for well over ten hours. Getting fucked by Jay has exhausted you enough to fix your broken sleeping schedule. You haven’t gotten a decent sleep ever since you moved in, and even before that you had frequent insomnia, so the fact that you were able to get a full night’s rest and then some was delighting you. “Well, how long have you been awake?” You asked. 

“Honestly, I couldn’t get much,” he laid his head in between your breasts. You were quite ticklish to the feeling of his hair brushing on your chest, but you didn’t say anything and just began running your fingers through it. 

“Why is that?”

“You told me you loved me, Y/N. Any man would go sleepless.”

You suppose you did, however, you didn’t expect him to be so affected by it. You brushed the hair from his forehead and asked, “Do you?”

“Do I what?”

“Do you love me back?”

“There must be nothing in that beautiful head of yours if you need to ask me that. I’ve been in love with you for a very long time,” he chuckled. He pressed a kiss to your breast and began squeezing it like it was some stress ball. You were amused at how nonchalant he was about it like it wasn’t turning you on all over again. 

“How long? I mean we barely met a month ago.”

Jay fell silent for a few moments. He suddenly felt a wave of guilt come over him as he realised how little you truly knew about him compared to how much he knew about you. He couldn’t tell you that he’s been practically stalking you for the past two years, but he already has been revealing things that his mother would have killed him for telling you. He decided to tell you the half-truth, “We met before.”

“Yeah, at events and stuff, but we’ve never talked before that.”

He shook his head, “I’m quite offended you forgot about our meet cute, my love. Three years ago, at the New Year’s Gala.” You raised your eyebrow, not recalling what he was talking about. He pressed another kiss on your skin and continued, “I found you crying outside of the venue. You told me you got into a fight with your boyfriend.”

It suddenly all flashed back. The dim lights of the hallway surrounding the gala venue, your ruined make-up, your crying so intense you could barely breathe. You may or may not have been a bit intoxicated. It wasn’t clear to you what exactly that fight with Sunghoon was about, but all you were certain of was that he was going to break up with you. 

You were so messed up that night that you buried the memories in the back of your mind, quickly dismissing them after Sunghoon apologised and took you back into his arms. 

Jay knew from your silence you were thinking about Sunghoon, and his annoyance and jealousy led him to flick your nipple, making you yelp.

“Ow! What was that for?” You responded by flicking him on the forehead, however, disappointed at his lack of reaction. 

“Nothing,” he mumbled, pressing his face back into your chest. You rolled your eyes. You couldn’t believe how he was acting like a baby as if it wasn’t he who mentioned your ex. 

“Wait so, is that when you started liking me? That’s like three years, and you didn’t say anything? Didn’t you have a girlfriend—,” You were stopped when you felt Jay’s finger pressed up against your lips.

“Shh, let’s not talk about that,” he whispered. You giggled at his action, even as he continued, “And she wasn’t my girlfriend. Just someone who refused to leave me alone.”

That made you happy for some reason. You didn’t think of yourself as jealous or possessive but you grinned with the new-found knowledge that he fell for you so quickly and couldn’t care less about the women following him around.

He placed one final kiss on your breast and stood up from the bed, stretching his arm out for you, “We should go take a shower.”

You looked at his hand with suspicion etched on your face, amusing Jay. “We should just go shower, right?”

Jay smirked at your insinuation, rubbing his hands over his face to try to hide his expression, “I just need to wash you up, I didn’t get the chance to yesterday since you were so out of it.”

“I can wash myself,” you said stubbornly. You had an inkling that Jay would pounce on you the moment he got you into the shower, given how many hours it took for him to be satisfied last night. The look in his eyes alone screamed insatiable. Your body however was too sensitive and you wanted to give your poor pussy a break from his abuse.

“Alright, then stand up,” he ordered. His menacing smirk was pissing you off, and you were determined to prove him wrong. You shakily climbed towards the edge of the bed, barely being able to balance yourself on your arms, unaware of how much Jay’s cock hardened at the sight of you crawling towards him with your naked and love-mark-covered body. 

You managed to stand up on wobbly legs, a pain shooting up your body at the awkward movements. You looked up towards Jay’s eyes, annoyed that his smirk was still there. “Now walk,” he added, and you felt yourself become wet at his stern and dominating tone.

You were nervous about your ability to do so but tried not to show it on your face. You took one step and you began to fall, too weak and shaky to make it any further. You didn’t hit the ground due to Jay grabbing you up by the waist. He picked you up in a princess style and you wrapped your arms around his shoulder, giving up your ambitions and accepting that you’d need his help.

“Fine, fine…We can shower together. Just shower though, you know I’m exhausted” you scolded him.

He smiled at you, placing a peck on your lips, “Just shower,” he agreed.

“You promise?” You looked up at him with your lovely and hypnotising eyes. 

He nodded back, “I promise, my love.”

He lied. Obviously. You were an absolute fool for believing him. 

The steam of the hot water was fogging up the glass of the shower door, as well as making it hard for you to properly think. Jay had you bent over, palms and tits pressed up against the cold glass. Your whines and the sound of your skin slapping were loud as he pounded into your cunt from behind you, and you were dizzy at the feeling of his cock splitting you open and the water hitting your back. You could feel the tip almost hitting your cervix. He was pounding inside you with no mercy. 

“Doesn’t this remind you of yesterday? When I took you in the rain,” Jay boasted. You couldn’t bring yourself to respond, but you agreed. This was much better though, given the water was warm and you weren’t afraid of someone catching you in the act. 

He reached forward to begin playing with your clit, causing a whimper to erupt from your mouth, “J-Jay. Slow down, ‘m gonna c-cum…” 

“So quickly? We just started, my love, surely you can hold out for longer,” he chuckled, fastening his pace on your clit and gripping tighter at your hips.

You sobbed out in pleasure, shaking your head, indicating that you aren’t going to be able to hold it in and will cum at any moment, especially with the stimulation from your clit as well as the inside of your cunt.

You heard him tsk behind you, and he began slowing his movement, eventually coming to a halt. You whined, “No…please, Jay. Please, let me cum.”

He harshly spanked your ass, making you hiss, “Didn’t you just tell me to slow down? Have I fucked you so dumb you can’t even make up your mind?”

You felt tears streaming down your face at the sudden loss of friction and pleasure, your cunt clenching painfully on his still cock. You subconsciously started moving your hips up and down on his length, trying to relieve your needs yourself, before Jay grabbed you by your neck and pushed your back flush against his chest. 

You felt him strike you again on your hip, hissing at the soreness of your skin, “Fuck, you’re such a desperate whore. Would you even be able to live without my cock?”

He used one hand to grip your waist, halting your bouncing on his cock. You shook your head, knowing that he had now ruined you for any other person, and you couldn’t imagine a life without him anymore.

“Answer me,” he tightened his grip on your waist. You, however, were far too disoriented to reply to him, given his fingers wrapped around your throat, the feeling of his skin on your back, the steam and the hot water hitting your body and his cock still deep inside you. You incoherently babbled something back to him.

You wailed again as he bent you over once more and thrust his cock back inside you. Your insides felt like they were on fire. Your hands began to shake and your palms slipped down from the glass, so you reached behind you to grip Jay’s biceps. 

“Tell me, Y/N. Tell me how much you love my cock. Tell me you could never live without me.”

You nodded weakly, “Yes, b-baby. F-Fuck, I love y-your…your cock! You’re it f-for me.”

You couldn’t see him, but you were sure he was smirking to himself at your words. He placed a kiss on the back of your head as a thank-you. 

“You can cum now, my love.”

Your eyes rolled back and your legs started shaking as you felt yourself cum around his cock. Jay wrapped his arms around to help steady you and groaned at the feeling of your clenching cunt. He came a few moments afterwards, mind melting at the feeling of you milking him dry.

You were in bliss at the feeling of his warm cum spilling inside you, filling you to the brim. You wished you were facing him so could kiss him and thank him for making you feel so good. You loved him immensely and wished you could be like this for eternity. Forever in his arms, just like this. 

“Don’t let a single drop go to waste, okay?”

You weren’t sure how you were going to do that, given you already felt some of it spilling out of you, but you nodded nonetheless. 

The next few moments were a blur. Jay washed you up. It was quite a weird experience getting shampooed with a dick inside you, but your mind was far too hazy to care. 

You then remember sitting on the bathroom sink as Jay wrapped you around in a towel, drying your hair and skin, making sure to go slowly and softly to not overwhelm you. He picked you up and brought you back to your bedroom.

He grabbed a body moisturiser from the nightstand and began rubbing your body with it. He wanted to help relax your muscles, soothing away the soreness that resulted from yesterday’s activities. 

He messages the lotion onto your legs, trailing up to your abdomen, and then finally to your breasts. You began to notice he had a weird fixation on your tits. He was palming at them, taking a longer time than he did with the rest of your body. When you looked at his face, you felt amused at the look of seriousness on it, as if he were taking a final exam.

“Jay, I swear if you’re getting hard over this I will—”

“I’m not, I promise,” he grinned childishly, “They’re just so fun to play with, can you blame me?”

You lifted your foot and placed the sole of it on his crotch, feeling how it was getting hard and stiff. You murmured, “You lying bastard.” 

Technically speaking, he was an actual bastard, but Jay decided not to make that comment. He instead threw his head back to laugh, “Okay, okay, I lied. I swear I’ll leave you alone this time. Just let me massage you, so you won’t be so sore later.”

“Alright then, go ahead.”

You laid there as he kept massaging you. He was so gentle with you, completely in contrast with how he was earlier. It was as if he thought you’d break if he was pressed any harder. The way he held you was incredibly intimate, making you feel warm inside. He looked so beautiful. You didn’t feel any sort of discomfort at being bare and vulnerable in front of him, instead you felt completely safe.

You raised your hands to try to brush his hair away from his face, but he pushed it away, telling you, “Relax, my love. Please.”

You obliged, letting him have his way with you.

It was the first time you and Jay sat together in the dining room. The space was devoid of any staff, as they left after serving your lunch. You were quiet, looking down worriedly at your food.

“Why aren’t you eating, my love? Do you not like it?” Jay voiced, reaching over to grab your hand.

You shook your head embarrassingly, “I just…I feel like the staff is ignoring me. When I walked here, none of them even looked at me.” You were aware that the servants generally didn’t acknowledge you much, but they never looked so flustered around you as they did today.

Jay threw his head and began laughing loudly, making you even more embarrassed, “I guess you weren’t quiet enough, but who can blame you? I’m amazing in bed.”

“Jay, I will throw this tomato at you,” You fumed, your eyebrows furrowing in a way that made Jay gush at how adorable you looked. He couldn’t stop laughing after you put your face into your palms and groaned. 

“Y/N, it’s fine. They’re probably surprised at your change of heart since you’ve been treating me like the plague for all of last month,” He had a point, but you still felt ashamed that the poor staff had to witness your blaring sex noises. 

Jay on the other hand wasn’t feeling nearly as sorry. Most of the staff staying late into the night were the guards, and he knew a few of them to share unsavoury glances towards you, especially your personal guard, Marco. They made it disgustingly obvious how much they would take you if you were to give them the chance. 

He smirked at the thought of them having to hear all your noises throughout the odd hours of the night, not being able to do anything about it. That should teach them to never look or breathe your way unless necessary. He placed a kiss on your knuckles and decided to change the subject to help distract you from your embarrassment, “What do you think about having your sister come over?”

Your eyes lit up. Gods, you missed Karina. It was killing you to not know how she was doing, “Yes! Please! Let’s have her over for dinner tonight, yeah? Oh Gods, I missed her so much,” you slapped your palms together and squealed. 

Although your mind was mostly preoccupied with Jay, you never forgot how you didn’t get to bid farewell to your sister because she was on a trip during the whole moving process. You were sure she was distressed with not knowing how you were or how to reach you.

“I’ll go call her then,” Jay smiled at you and left the room to go find his phone. Jay thought it’d be better to call her as soon as possible given how long the drive is from your former family home to his. He, however, wasn’t looking forward to the conversation.

“Park Jongseong?! Oh, you have a lot of audacity calling me now. You steal my fucking sister in the middle of the night and now you’re calling me acting like nothing happened? Where is my sister?! I will kill you, motherfucker!” Karina was belting so loudly that Jay had to stretch his arm out to not burst his eardrums. 

He sighed and rolled his eyes, very much expecting this reaction from her. Karina was known for her protective nature when it came to her little sister and was high up on Jay’s list of the most terrifying women in the world. He was lucky he proposed to you while she was away, not even wanting to think of the tantrums he would have to deal with. He had a feeling she would have barricaded you to stop you from having to leave if she could.

“Nice to hear from you too, Karina,” he muttered sarcastically. 

That made her even more infuriated as she continued yelling, “You fucking prick! You’re lucky I’m not there because I’d rip your throat out with my bare hands if I could, you bitch! Do you think because your mommy has all the power in the world you can just go around acting like you own the place? Give my sister back you asshole!” 

“Karina, I suggest you calm down. I’m calling because your sister wants something from you. And just for your information, my mother was the one that arranged all this, blame her.”

He could hear Karina’s breathing relax. She answered with a shockingly soft tone, ignoring the last part of his words, “She needs something? Of course, I’ll be there. Tell her that.” 

Jay found it far too hilarious how quickly her demeanour changed. “She wants you to come over for dinner tonight. Is your schedule—,” he was cut off by her excited gasp.

“Of course! I’ll free up my schedule. I’ll be there. Give me the address,” she beamed.

He was amused at her sudden change in demeanour, chuckling to himself. 

“What the fuck are you laughing at? You cunt!”

He ignored her, “I’ll be away running errands tonight which should leave you two plenty of time to catch up.”

“Oh, so what? You’re too much of a coward to face me?”

She wasn’t necessarily wrong. He wasn’t interested in dealing with Karina’s drama today, but even if he were to stay for the dinner, she’d probably be pissed and ask him to leave so there was really no winning on his part. He sighed.

“I will let your sister know you’ll be coming.”

“Wait, why doesn’t she—”

He hung up. 

You saw the car drive up to the entrance, and from the front, you saw your family’s chauffeur. Then came out Karina, who smiled so wide she shined like the sun. She came running towards you and you almost fell over when she tackled you, embracing you tightly. 

“Y/N! I missed you so much,” she began showering her eyes through your body, then tightly grabbing your shoulders, “Are you hurt? Did he hurt you? Tell me exactly what he did to—,” her voice was rushed and desperate.

In contrast, yours was calm and collected as you tried to ease her worries, “I’m okay. We’ll discuss everything once you’re inside.”

You could tell in Karina’s eyes she couldn’t quite believe your words. For all she knew, you were being held hostage, being threatened by Jay not to say anything. 

You hooked your arms around hers and walked her through the manor towards the dining room. It was beautifully decorated as per your request, wanting everything to be absolutely perfect for your sister. 

“Any preference for your drink?” you asked softly.

“White wine is fine,” she murmured, glaring at all the servants walking around the room. 

You both sat down, and Karina still had a heavy layer of suspicion etched on her face. She almost flinched when Sara came up behind her to pour the wine into her glass. You clapped your hands and declared, “My sister and I would like some privacy for the evening.” The servants scattered out of the room, and you noticed Karina’s shoulders deflate in relaxation. 

“I don’t want Jongseong’s spies to be listening in on our conversations,” she muttered, glaring at the silver platter of food in front of her.

You were quite amused at her attitude, although knowing she wasn’t exactly wrong. You knew your actions made it back to Jay through the watchful eyes and listening ears of the servants and guards, much to your frustration. “Tell me how you like the pasta, I asked Minseo to make you your favourite—”

Karina stabbed her food with a fork and groaned, “Y/N, I’m not here to talk about fucking pasta,” you flinched at her tone. Her eyes softened at the look on your face, “I’m sorry. I’ve just…This entire month I’ve been feeling insane. I cried every night because I was the reason why all of this happened to you,” her voice cracked at the last part.

Your eyes flew open, “Karina, what are you talking about? None of this is your fault.”

Karina’s eyes were welling up, “I never should’ve gotten involved with Heesung.”

You knew from the beginning that your sister’s relationship with such a dangerous man from the underground of Olympus would get the family into trouble, but you never wished for it. Karina being the heir to the family company made it especially more tricky.

Although your dad loved you both equally, you were only the spare in case something happened to Karina, so he never particularly cared about your entanglements, such as the fact that you were in a relationship with a low-class man. 

As far as you remember, your father had no idea about Karina’s relationship, but ever since the Parks began their siege, you don’t doubt your father has been made in the know and gone to great lengths to end it.

“What happened to him?” you asked.

“To say Dad was upset would be an understatement,” Karina chuckled through her tears. “He threatened to send his men after Heesung and his family if he ever went near me again, so we cut off contact. Haven’t heard from him for over a month.”

You pressed your palms on your forehead, appalled at the state of your family right now. Your father was not known to be a violent person but you could imagine with the state of the company and family right now, he goes to any lengths to protect them. Compared to what your father and sister were going through, the past month has been peace and bliss for you. 

“I’m going to get you out of here soon, Y/N, trust me.”

You looked down, too afraid to meet her pleading eyes, “I don’t wish to leave.”

Karina stopped all her movements and the look she sent your way sent a shiver down your spine, “What?”

“I’m fine here.”

Her eyes were bulging in shock at your calm tone, “What do you mean you’re fine? You were threatened to marry a man you didn’t even know. You were going to get engaged to Sunghoon, I mean what—”

“This is what I wanted to discuss with you, Karina,” you put your wine glass down. Karina furrowed her eyebrows, but with a slight bit of patience left in her body, she motioned for you to keep going, “My engagement to Jay is the least of your worries right now because I’m fine. I’m not hurt, I’m safe and Jay will protect me from—”

You heard the floor creak as Karina stood up from her chair, “Protect you?! From what, his own family? Y/N, what the fuck are you talking about?”

You sighed, wishing Karina could just understand where you were coming from, “I’m just trying to tell you that you don’t have to worry about me. Jay cares about me, he—”

“This is fucking insane. Is he making you say all this? Is it Stockholm syndrome?”

You began walking up towards her, “You don’t know him, Karina. I trust him completely.”

“Then he manipulated you! Him and his bitch of a mother. Y/N this isn’t right, he is a monster, he does not care about you because why else would he take you from us? Keeping you locked away in a fortress is not a sign that he cares about you, he wants to control you. They have complete control over Dad because you’re here. He thinks that if he steps out of line against the Parks, they will kill you!”

You never thought of it that way, assuming you didn’t have a particularly large part to play in the war between your and Jay’s families, however, you still felt the utmost trust towards Jay.

“Karina…please,” you put your hand on her cheek, brushing away her tears of frustration, “Jay would never let something like that happen to me. Please, believe me.”

Karina's eyes squinted as she looked like she was thinking. She fumed, “You’re in love with him, aren’t you?” The look on her face was terrifying, reminiscent of all the times she contemplated killing someone for hurting you. You stayed silent, not being able to look into her scowling eyes. She shook her head and sighed heavily, placing her face into her palms. “You stupid, stupid girl. How can you not understand that he’s not a good man?”

“He doesn’t have to be a good man for me to trust him,” you whispered. You knew you sounded insane, but you were honest. You knew from the gossip around high society that Jay was not a kind man, there often being rumours of him being just as violent as his mother, if not more. 

Maybe it wasn’t logical, but all the times he told you that he loved you, you believed him and knew in your heart he would never hurt someone he loved.

Karina sighed, sitting back in her chair and wrapping her arms around your torso. “They took you from me, Y/N. They made me think I was the reason you were suffering.”

“I understand Karina, but look at me now. I am safe.”

Karina wasn’t letting go of the suspicions she held for Jay but knew you were going to be stubborn. Generally speaking, you did look okay. In fact, you were glowing from within, utterly in love and happy. She remembered the dark circles that used to adorn your face back when you struggled with insomnia, that were beginning to fade. Not to mention how your body looked fuller and healthier compared to how sickly you looked before. 

Karina trusted you were doing well, but didn’t trust Jay to not betray you. She wasn’t sure what she was going to do about him but decided to leave it for now. 

“I’ll kill him if he lays a hand on you,” she lied. She was far too weak to hurt Jay and knew there was practically nothing she could do given the power of his family.

“Karina…,” you sighed, cradling her head.

“I love you, Y/N. I don’t want what happened to Mom to happen to you,” she began sobbing.

“Don’t you dare say that,” you tried to comfort her. 

After you managed to calm her down, you sat back in your chair and tried to continue your dinner normally, pretending like your lives were the same as they used to be. You asked her about her trip, and she asked you what books you’ve been reading. The sky became dark, and eventually, you and Karina called it a night. 

Standing at the entrance, you watched as Karina walked down the marble steps towards the car. Before she could step into it though, she quickly ran back up and embraced you once more. 

She desperately wanted to stay, spend every waking moment protecting you from the dangers of the world like she used to. 

“We’ll see each other again, Karina,” you whispered.

“Of course. I’ll just miss you so much.”

Once she finally left, you stood there in front of the doors to the manor, your hair blowing in the wind of the late evening. You were still trying to process everything Karina told you. As of now, the people you trusted the most were your sister and your husband, but what were you to do when they were on opposing sides?

You were rubbing the serum into your face, staring intently at your reflection in the bathroom mirror. It had been about an hour since Karina left, and your mind was reeling at the events of the night, still conflicted inside you. 

You saw Jay’s figure walk into the bathroom, stalking slowly behind you. He pressed his chest against your back and leaned down to kiss your neck. He was trying to ignore the feeling his crotch pressed up against your ass. 

You were getting ready for bed, so you were only in your panties and an oversized shirt that you found in Jay’s closet, hoping he wouldn’t mind you taking his things. He wrapped his arms around your stomach and asked, “How did it go, my love?”

You knew you shouldn’t have lied, but you didn’t wish to worry Jay, and maybe a small part of you was trying to be more careful about the things you said around him ever since Karina reminded you just how untrustworthy he was, “It went really well,” you grinned into the mirror. 

“I’m glad,” he whispered. He sounded tired, and although that was true, he was also lying about his interest in your day. He couldn’t care less about how things went with Karina as long as you were okay. He understood he wasn’t being the best brother-in-law, but he didn’t invite her over because he wanted to feel closer to his family. All he cared about was your happiness, but didn’t concern himself with anyone that involved in it that wasn’t him.

“What’s that?” he nudged his chin towards the bottle of moisturiser you picked up.

You raised your eyebrows, “you’ve never used face moisturiser before?”

He shook his head, taking the bottle from your hand and inspecting it, “I kept wondering why Minseo bought these little bottles for you.”

You rolled your eyes, “you’re telling me you don’t do any skincare?”

“Nope, I just know you put that cream over your body after you shower.”

You threw your head back in frustration, “How on earth is your skin so clear then? That is so unfair,” you were utterly envious of just how perfect he was.

He chuckled into your shoulder, turning you around to face him, “Why don’t you put some on me?” 

You felt him grip your waist and pull you close, close enough to hear the sound of his breathing. You took a fingerful of the moisturiser and began rubbing it into his cheeks. His smile was loving and warm, mesmerised by your soft touch and your intense focus on his skin. 

His skin was so smooth, it almost made you want to cry. Fuck, he was truly the most gorgeous and flawless man in the world. How did you think you wouldn’t have fallen for him so deeply?

Once you were done, he did the same to you, gently rubbing the cream into your face and neck. You could tell he wasn’t used to doing this, his technique being very sloppy, unlike the one he had when he was rubbing your body that morning. 

You both stood there in silence as you stared at each other, and he could tell in your eyes how affected you were by the intimacy of it all. Your body was hot, your nipples were hardening at the pressure of his chest against them, and your panties were beginning to dampen. 

You gulped as he lowered his hands down to your hips and pulled you closer, your body now completely flush against his. It was impossible to ignore the feeling of his bulge pressed up against you.

“I want to make you feel good tonight,” you whispered in his ear, trailing your hands down his chest. 

He tightened his grip on your hips and said, “You always make me feel good.”

You shook your head, leaning down on your knees, looking up at him with your doe eyes that could’ve melted him into a puddle, “Not like that.”

His breathing became heavier as you unzipped his dress pants and pulled them down. Your back was arched and your eyes were focused solely on how large his bulge had already gotten. You followed by slowly trailing down his boxers. His cock sprung up, hard and already leaking with precum. Gods, he was so greedy for you that it was almost embarrassing how much you affected him. 

You wrapped your hand around his cock and began pumping it up and down as Jay groaned at the pleasure. It was slightly sloppy, much to your embarrassment. “I’m not very good at this,” you said sheepishly. Your eyes were shiny and your face heated up at the admission. Although you weren’t a virgin, you were not very skilled at blowjobs.

Fuck, you were like a nymph that was brought into this world to make Jay go completely mad. You looked so beautiful, and oddly innocent as you were pumping his erection while looking softly into his eyes. He wanted to ruin you. He wished he could keep you around him forever. Even with how inexperienced you seemed, he had to hold himself back from not cumming right then and there.

You finally wrapped your lips around his tip, worried at how much of his cock you could truly take. He sighed in relief as you began bobbing your head up and down, sucking him off as your life depended on it.

He was going to let you take control and be gentle with you because of how timid you seemed, but he couldn’t wait to imagine training your throat to take him properly. He wanted to take you like this over and over again, fucking your face and decorating it with his cum. That would be for another day, though, and he prided himself on his patience. 

You couldn’t manage to take his entire length, gagging at only the halfway point, so you used your hands to pump the base of his cock. He smirked knowing your mouth could barely handle his size yet. 

His groans were loud, his hands were running through your hair, trying to move it away from your face. He felt his orgasm nearing and told you as much. 

He tried to push you back, not wanting to spill himself inside your throat so as not to shock you, but you whined and shook your head. There were tears brimming in your eyes, but you held kept pumping his cock inside your mouth and in your hands, your face hot and your eyes sultry as you desperately wanted to taste him. You wanted every part of him inside you, including his seed, so you weren’t about to let him go.

Jay was shocked at your persistence and desperation. He finally spilled inside and you felt his cum coat your throat. It was warm, and you swallowed every last drop. 

Once you were satisfied you let go and bent over, palms on the floor. You were trying to catch your breath and relax, and felt Jay embrace you and began rubbing your back in an attempt to soothe you like he always does. “You were amazing.”

“I tried my best,” you managed to say in between coughs.

“You were incredible,” he reiterated. “I was just shocked that you swallowed, you seemed like you were really struggling,” he chuckled.

You rolled your eyes at how he was practically boasting about the size of his cock. You lightly slapped him on the shoulder and said, “I wasn’t about to let you cum all over my face and ruin my skincare.”

He grabbed your head and placed a kiss on your temple, “Another time, then,” you felt the smirk on his lips against your skin.

For weeks following that, you and Jay were completely inseparable. You couldn’t imagine living a life without him, and he couldn’t handle the thought of you being out his sight for even one moment.

Jay stopped visiting his father at night, instead choosing to spend it with you, doing whatever it was that you wanted, taking you wherever you wished. 

You were physically tired almost every day due to your ever-so-active sex life. Jay took you anywhere that he felt like. 

One day, you two were playing pool and Jay couldn’t help but focus intently on the way you bent your body over the pool table. The game ended with your chest pressed up against the fabric of the table, your skirt lifted up to your waist, and Jay’s cock pounding away inside you.

He would frequently take you back to the gazebo where your love for him blossomed to what it was now, and he fucked you there in practically every position you could think, and each time you felt fearful and yet also enticed by the risk of someone catching you two.

When he took you to restaurants, it was not uncommon for him to slip a vibrator inside you and increase the setting every time the waiter came around to check on you, making you shake in nervousness and stutter in response.

Although it was rare, he would sometimes let you be on top. Just a few nights ago, you two were watching a film by the fireplace when an intimate scene came on and you couldn’t hold yourself back from getting on top of him and desperately riding his cock. Your moans were loud that evening, and you got so exhausted that Jay had to help you by gripping your hips and guiding you. It didn’t take long for him to flip you over though, and take control away from you, but you greatly enjoyed your brief moment on top of him.

It was an understatement to say you two were utterly insatiable for each other.

You were now getting ready for bed, your body wrapped in a bathrobe after your hot shower. Jay was in his office, you believe he was making a few business calls, but weren’t entirely sure. After doing your skincare, you went into your bedroom and began changing into your pyjamas.

Right as you were about to start buttoning up your silk sleeping shirt, your personal guard came into the room, making you gasp and grab a nearby pillow to cover your chest. The material of your clothes was thin and you weren’t partially comfortable with him seeing you like this. 

“Marco?! What are you doing here? Is everything alright?”

Marco nodded, not doing anything to soothe your worried reaction to him intruding on you. You were appalled at his lack of manners, because what man doesn’t knock before walking into a lady’s room? “Mr. Park just wanted to let you know he’ll be up here in about fifteen minutes.”

You nodded nervously, “Yes, of course. Thank you for letting me know. You can go now.”

He didn’t listen, instead, he slowly walked up to your shaking body and asked you, “May I?” pointing at your shirt. He gently took away the pillow from your hands, and even though you held onto it for dear life, his strength made it all too easy to leave you bare for him. 

You placed your arms over your chest, trying to cover it, but he placed his hands on them and tried to calm you, “Could I just button them up for you?.”

His grip on your arms was tight as he managed to spread them open. He began buttoning up your shirt slowly and making sure to brush his hands against your bare skin. Marco did not think very highly of you, although being mesmerised by your beautiful body. It was getting harder for him to ignore his desire to fuck you open in your marriage home. He used to wonder about what it would be like to be your paramour, given how little seemed to like Jay in the beginning. 

You were disgusted by his touch and sternly said, “Marco. Leave, right now.”

Right as he finished with the last button, he stepped back and your breathing intensified at the events that just transpired. You sent a glare at him, and began raising your voice, “Get the fuck out!”

Marco had no reaction on his face, no remorse for disrespecting you, and just as he was at the door to leave, he turned around and with the most frightening tone, said, “Mr. Park is a lucky man to have you as his bride.”

Once he left, you ran up to the door and shut it as hard as you could. You pressed your back against it and loudly sighed in relief now that he was gone. You immediately ripped off your clothes and threw them in the laundry bin, not wanting any bit of Marco touching your body. You thought you would have to burn it once you had the chance.

You turned off the lights and laid yourself in bed. Your breath was shaky and your mind was heavy. 

After a while, once your body managed to calm down and you began forcing yourself to try and sleep, you felt the door creak open again. You flinched.

“Jay?” you called out, wanting to make sure you weren’t in danger again.

“Yes, my love?” he replied. He sounded exhausted. 

You felt him lay beside you and you immediately turned around to wrap your arms around him tightly. You weren't sure how you were going to tell him about Marco, or whether you should tell him at all. You were now terrified of living in this house.

Jay felt your heavy breathing in the crook of his neck and knew you were thinking about something that worried you, “Is everything okay?”

You nodded weakly. “Yes. I’m okay,” you lied.

“You know you can tell me anything, right?”

“Of course, baby.”

That night, Jay felt a sense of dread as he felt you distancing yourself once more. He knew you weren’t telling him something. Although he understood it would take you longer than just a few months to fully trust him, he desperately wanted to know what it was that was hurting you. 

Before Jay could step foot out of his office, Minseo came into the room rushed and ever so slightly dishevelled. She looked as if she saw something terrible transpire. 

“Mr. Park, a word alone please,” she said breathily, “It concerns Mrs. Park.”

Jay’s eyes flew open, “What? Is she alright? I saw her just half an hour ago, what happened?”

Minseo looked down, her face red in a mixture of fury and worry for you. “I witnessed something bad happen to her last night.” 

Jay furrowed his eyebrows. He knew it. He fucking knew it and he was appalled that you hadn't told him about it. He stepped closer to Minseo, “Tell me what happened, please. Don’t leave a detail out.” Who do I have to kill? He didn’t say the last part out loud, but Minseo knew already the dangers that came the way of the man who laid his hands on you.

“It was Marco,” Jay’s eyes darkened at her words, “I saw him enter her room while she was changing. She begged him to leave, of course, she was practically naked. He forcefully grabbed her and placed his hands on her chest. He left after she screamed at him one last time,” Minseo’s breathing was uneasy as she imagined the stress you might have been under. She could tell from Jay’s body that he felt murderous, but was holding himself back from losing his cool in front of her.

She couldn’t bring herself to look Jay in the eye when she continued, “I am so sorry, Mr. Park. I wish I could’ve gone in there and stopped him, but I was afraid of his strength. You hire such strong men to protect you I was afraid he would’ve used that strength against me. I know it was selfish, I beg you to forgive me. I am so sorry your wife had to get hurt under my watch,” her eyes were brimming with tears, and she didn’t calm down as Jay awkwardly patted her shoulder to calm her. 

“None of this is your fault. Please find Marco and bring him to me,” he said through his clenched teeth and reeling mind. 

“Right away,” she said but before she could leave he said one final thing.

“Stay close to Y/N. As of now, you’re the only one in this house I trust to be around her.”

It had been a few hours since Jay suddenly left the manor, much to your surprise. You didn’t get the chance to ask where he went, and when you asked Minseo, she gave a vague answer about him wanting to visit his father once more.

You felt suspicious regarding her answer but decided to leave it alone. You thought you would have eaten dinner alone that night but Minseo decided to join you. Although it was odd, you did appreciate the company.

Minseo stayed close by to you the entire night, right as you went to bed. For hours you just laid on your mattress, awake and wondering what it was that had Jay missing for so long. A part of you was embarrassed by how dependent you had become on him that a single night away was causing you to act this way. Another part of you went back to the words shared by your sister the night she came for dinner. All about the dangers that come with entailing yourself in Jay’s life. 

You heard the whispered sound of running water in the bathroom across Jay’s bedroom and stood up to begin walking towards it. In the dim lighting of the hallway, you saw Jay’s silhouette bent over the sink and washing his hands.

“Baby? How did your visit go?” you asked timidly. He didn't say anything, and as you walked closer you began to feel confused at his white shirt that was no longer white. It was covered in massive pools of red and his skin. His hair was wet from the sweat and by Gods, he looked like an absolute mess. Your eyes widened and you placed your hands over your mouth in shock. “Jay?! What happened? Are you alright?” you said, reaching over to grip his bicep. 

He stared at your reflection in the mirror, and you felt a shiver run up your spine at his terrifyingly dark stare. He again stayed silent for a while, letting your shock wash over you. 

Then he began, “I had to hear it from Minseo of all people.”

Your hands were shaking ever so slightly, eyes trailing over his body and noticing he had no cuts or wounds, leading you to believe this was someone else’s blood. “What?” you whispered. 

You flinched as he turned around and slammed the door shut behind you. He grabbed your shoulders and forced you to look into his eyes, “A man laid his hands on you,” his breathing was hard, “he hurt you and I had to hear it from fucking Minseo?” he asked. His voice was rough but not loud. 

You began putting the pieces together and realised the blood on his clothes that was now transferring over to you was belonging to your old guard. You had no words, focused solely on his murderous stare. 

You managed to muster up, “Why did you kill Marco?”

He growled, “That’s a stupid fucking question, but I’ll entertain you,” his voice was menacing, “No man who lays a hand on my wife will make it out alive. I made sure that bastard suffered until his last dying breath.” 

There were tears brimming in your eyes. You’ve never been so terrified by the man standing before you, and a part of you desperately wanted to leave his grasp. You gently cupped his face with cold hands, “You shouldn’t have done that, Jay. I was going to tell you eventually. You could have fired him, but now—”

“Fire him?! Are you mad? Fire him so he could go work with another family and assault their women?” He was fuming, “I do not believe you would have told me anything because I know a part of you still doesn’t trust me. I’ve tried to make you believe that I’m not a monster, but I’m done with that bullshit.” 

You did trust him. Gods you trusted him to an illogical point, but fear was not the same thing as distrust. “Of course I love you, but this is not the man I fell in love with.”

“Oh, you know damn well that’s not true. Who the fuck do you think is responsible for executing my family’s enemies?” Your mouth flew open at the revelation, your mind flashing back to the warning words of your sister.

He sighed, his fists clenching, “If you love me, then show me. Don’t keep secrets from me. Why would you keep that from me?” He turned over his palms and you saw the red streaks of blood and the purple bruises adorning it. Even after he tried washing it, it was still obvious what happened. “Do you see my hands? They’re covered in the blood of a man who dishonoured you, and I’d do it a million times over again. I need you to understand that.” 

This was the real him. Although your presence in his life has made him infinitely times warmer than he used to be, he was built on a foundation of darkness and violence. You were what finally made his cold heart beat to life, and he would do anything to protect you and keep you by his side. 

“Jay…,” you embraced him, not wanting to keep looking at his blood-covered body, “I am so, so sorry. I should have told you everything, but I was in shock. I felt ashamed that I let him touch me and I…,” your trailed off.

He pulled you towards him and began rubbing your hair, feeling guilty now that he didn’t have enough time to process how you may have felt about all this. His insecurities led him to believe you didn’t say anything because you were afraid of him. He imagined resurrecting Marco and killing him over and over again for making you feel this way. 

“You are mine,” he murmured.

“I am yours,” you reiterated, your eyes were shining and pleading.

“I almost went mad, Y/N.”

“I think you did go mad.”

He shook his head, the corner of his lips raising, “You haven't seen me go mad just yet. That was nothing.” He grabbed your jaw and roughly kissed you. Your grip on his shoulder tightened and you felt ashamed by how aroused you became. What he did terrify you to no end, but a part of you, a sick and depraved part of you, liked the possessiveness of his actions and words. You were his, mind and body, and you enjoyed seeing him prove to you as such. 

“You are mine,” he repeated, low and furious, “Every part of you belongs to me.”

He raised his legs to force your cunt on his thigh and began grinding against it, making you whimper. “Y-Yes, baby. I’m all y-yours.” 

He slapped the side of your thighs, which were bare as you wearing your pyjama shorts, making you yelp in pain, “You do not keep secrets from me, do you understand?” 

You nodded, your shorts dampening at his roughness. Your face was heating up and you began to sweat, ashamed at how little control you had over your body. You would have done anything for Jay, and let him take you however he wanted.

Now, you were about to let him fuck you open while covering you in the blood of his enemy. 

“Get on your knees,” he demanded. You rushed to the ground with no hesitation, your face now facing his pelvis. After that night two weeks ago, you hadn’t gotten the chance to go down on him, and you felt yourself leaking into your shorts at the excitement of getting to do it again. “You know what to do.”

You immediately unzipped his trousers all too quickly you wrapped your mouth around his cock. It was all too overwhelming to you how badly you wanted to make him feel good, a part of you hoping to use this as a way of asking for forgiveness. Jay was amused at your desperation, “Gods, look at you. You’re such a slut for my cock.”

You whined around his cock, as you’ve always loved when he talked down to you. Jay’s style of lovemaking was usually a mix of roughness and intense movements alongside soft and reassuring words. However, you never did mind him degrading you. 

Like before, you were struggling to handle his size, but instead of going gently on you, Jay grabbed a fistful of your hair and began gradually fucking himself into your mouth. Your throat desperately tried to take him in smoothly, but you were becoming lightheaded at the abuse on your poor mouth. 

Jay was enjoying seeing you like this, desperate and exhausted, with your cheeks adorned with fat tears from your struggle to take him. Your throat felt incredible, and he made it his goal for you to be able to take it fully eventually. To be fair, you were doing better than last time, but you still had a ways to go. You were slobbering and gagging at the feeling of his tip hitting the back of your head, and Jay knew he would cum soon enough. 

Jay glared when he noticed you trail your hands inside your shorts, taking your own action to relieve the pressure in between your legs. He pulled your face away and you began pumping him, letting his seed spill all over your face. Fuck, the way you looked made him want to devour you whole. 

He leaned down to pick you up and placed you on the sink, taking a handful of your ass and slapping it in fury. You cried out before he grabbed your hand and lifted it up in front of him, seeing it covered in your essence. “I didn’t say you could touch yourself, now did I?” 

You shook your head, “I’m sorry, I…I just…I’m sorry, baby.”

He spanked you again, making tears well up in your eyes once more. He growled, “You don’t get to call me that tonight.”

You nodded nervously, “I’m sorry, sir.”

“You do not do anything unless I tell you to, understand?” 

“Y-Yes, of course. I’m so, so sorry,” your voice was desperate and submissive. 

He turned you around and pulled your shorts down, your ass now on full display for him, already pink from his rough strikes. “I forgive you, my love,” he whispered, “But I’ll have to make an example out of this. I don’t want a bad girl to be under me.”

His hands came back onto your ass, but he didn’t just stop once, instead striking you a few times until your legs were shaking and your skin became sore at the feeling. He plunged his cock inside your pussy with no warning, making your double over in shock and pleasure.

He pounded inside of your cunt, grabbing the hair on the back of your head and pulling it up so you could look at your reflection in the mirror. You were embarrassed at how you looked, so pathetic and desperate and at the whim of Jay’s commands. Your pussy clenched around his cock as you felt it his your cervix, “S-So deep. You’re s-so deep,” you stuttered. 

You felt his balls slapping your clit and your mind was spinning at the mix of stimulants. Fuck, it would take Jay practically seconds to make you cum at this point, and you were indeed right. You clamped around him as you felt yourself climax, but that didn’t stop Jay. He kept rutting himself into you, pulling your hair once more.

“Look at yourself. You look like a whore who was made to take my cock. A desperate and pathetic slut,” you clenched at his crude words, much to the soreness of your pussy from your recent orgasm.

He brought you up to stand and flipped you over once more. He lifted you up by your waist and you wrapped your legs around his torso. Just like before, he wasted no time shoving his cock deep inside you. He brushed away the tears of overstimulation that were brimming in your eyes. 

All the times you’ve taken him, and yet you still couldn’t get used to his size. It truly felt like he was splitting you open every time, and it didn’t help that he was practically treating you like a rag doll right now. He was filled with utter adoration and love for you, so much so that he couldn’t handle the weight of it. 

He placed a kiss on your lips, making you breathless. “I-It’s too much, s-sir. I’m go-going to…cum!” you yelped. You were incredibly sensitive but you could feel your second orgasm nearing itself. You held him as if you were going to fall into a deep tunnel, and your life depended on his stability. “It’s too much, Jay.”

Jay sucked on his teeth and looked at you with mock disappointment, “Oh? It’s too much? What a shame. You’d think after all these nights you’d be able to handle a bit more but here you are, weak and pathetic as ever.” 

You shook your head, wanting to tell him he was wrong, but your voice was stuck in your throat. You were determined to prove to him you could handle his intensity, but how could you when he was right, and you were losing your mind before you could even cum a second time. 

“Do you still want me to slow down?” he asked with a smirk. He was putting up the front that he was testing you, but he was becoming worried this may be too much for you as he felt his sanity come back alive. “Say the word and I’ll stop.”

“Not a chance,” you declared, your stare filled with lust and determination. You were going to prove to him that you could handle anything that he sent your way and tightened your legs to pull him closer inside you. You heard him groan at the feeling and you began seeing stars at his cock going deeper than you were ever used to. 

You are incredible, Jay’s mind was reeling. You never failed to leave him amazed at how much love he could feel for one person. 

He kept pounding on your sensitive cunt, bringing his hands down to start playing with your clit, causing you to moan louder than you had the entire night. Your body was shaking, sweating and glowing. 

Jay was close, and you were even closer. You came around his cock once more, a few thrusts before you felt him spill his warm seed inside you once more. Your clamping pussy was milking every last drop of him, satisfying the desire for Jay to fill you up and get you pregnant. “I’m going to get you pregnant, yeah?” he whispered.

You nodded, your doe eyes shining with the dim yellow lights of the bathroom, “Yes, I beg you.”

“You beg me?” he smirked, “You beg me to fill you with my heir? You don’t have to ask, my love. I can already imagine you swollen with my babies. You would look so beautiful. Fuck, I can’t even imagine how you could look even more beautiful than you do now.” He decided not to mention how he wanted to show every man who encountered exactly who you belonged to, and who was your rightful life partner. 

Gods, he couldn’t breathe at the thought of you two raising a family together. He would do absolutely anything to protect them and would go to the lengths of the world the same he would for you. 

You slumped over and rested your head in the crook of his head, closing your eyes in rest. 

After he washed you up and changed your clothes, he took you back to the bedroom, deciding to deal with the bloodied bathroom another time. 

As you laid on the bed, looking peaceful and in bliss, Jay kissed you on your temple, “You will never understand the extent to which I love you,” he whispered. However, you weren’t awake to hear him. 

Karina had her arms intertwined with yours as you were walking through the lush garden of your backyard. The sun was blaring and the sky was perfectly clear. 

You asked Jay if your sister could come over once more because you missed her presence incredibly, and although you were telling the truth, you left out the part about you still being terrified of what Jay has done to your old guard.

Since that night, Jay had fired your other personal guard, as well as many other staff, believing them to be reckless enough to let Marco slip through the cracks and hurt you. He had hired two new personal guards for you, and one of them was a man he trusted with all his life. His name was Jake Sim, and he was a childhood friend of Jay’s who had previously worked as a guard for the mayor of Olympus.  

Jake was not too far behind you and your sister, a common occurrence whenever Jay was not around you. It was honestly annoying, but you understood why Jay was paranoid. 

“I can tell something is wrong, Y/N,” Karina said lowly, afraid of Jake overhearing what she was saying. 

You looked down at the ground, “Something bad happened last week.”

You explained everything to Karina, only leaving out the part where you came on Jay’s cock two times mere minutes after being told of the death of Marco. Your face heated up at the reminder of your blood-soaked pyjamas.

Karina’s jaw fell at the revelation, and although she fully believed him to be capable of such murder, a part of her hoped you wouldn’t be subject to the horror of his ways. She immediately wrapped her arms around you and began tearing up. 

“That bastard!” Karina screamed, not caring anymore about the fact that you two were not alone.

“Jay just wanted to protect—”

Karina’s head snapped at you and she looked appalled, “I don’t mean him, you dummy! I meant your guard. A horrible, horrible man assaulted my baby sister and I wasn’t there to protect her.” You heard Karina’s voice tremble in fear and worry.

“Karina, stop it,” you gripped her hands, “Stop blaming yourself.”

Karina couldn’t help it. Her mind kept going back to all the mistakes she made that led to you ending up in this situation, living in the same house as a murderous monster. She imagined she would’ve wanted to do the same thing if she found out you were hurt, but chose to ignore that. 

“Y/N, don’t you see? This is why I don’t trust you living with Jay,” Karina began rubbing her forehead.

“Karina, I told you to drop it.”

“He didn’t even hesitate to just kill a man, that is psycho behaviour. You know well enough that was not his first body either,” Karina was fuming. “Y/N, Dad and I have been thinking of how we could get the upper hand on the Parks and get you out of this situation.”

You were confused and a little frustrated at Karina’s refusal to understand you wanted to stay with Jay but nodded your head to let her continue because living in bliss with the love of your life was at the expense of your family's suffering. 

Karina whispered, “Jay’s mother is going on a business trip next week, so the Parks’ manor will be empty except for servants. Dad has a spy who is currently working for Aphrodite and he tells us that Mrs. Park is keeping her blackmail material in a safe in the manor. You will go there with Jay and find it, I will tell you as soon as possible the code and location once I get more information but tell me, can you do this for me?”

You were hesitant, but replied to her, “I will try, but don’t you think this is reckless? The Parks are going to find other ways to control us.”

“Y/N, it’s worth a try. The files they have aren’t only about me and Dad. The things they have about you are horrendous,” she was trembling.

“What?”

“Look, I don’t know the exact details, but you could be in great danger. Please, I’m begging you,” she looked at you with pleading eyes. She didn’t want to admit it, but a part of her felt safe putting you up to this because she knew Jay would never let something bad happen to you. 

You nodded nervously, “I’ll do it.”

You and Jay were walking hand in hand through his mother’s manor, heading towards the dining room where you first met her personally. Jay was confused from the very beginning as to why you wanted so badly to come here, not believing any of your odd and vague reasonings. 

The manor was empty of most servants after his mother went overseas, except for a few that weren’t in your vicinity. 

“Should we have a drink?” Jay quirked his head towards the wine cellar.

“I wouldn’t mind a wine,” you smiled his way, but before he could pull you towards the room, you exclaimed, “Oh! You don’t happen to know if your mother keeps that strawberry champagne, would you?”

Jay’s movements stilled. His soft expression that was plastered across his face dropped immediately and his heart felt like it dropped to the soles of his feet. Surely you weren’t talking about what he was thinking. “What?”

“Oh, I guess you don’t. It was this pink and glittery champagne that your mother infused with strawberries, it was really good,” you said completely unaware of the turmoil inside Jay’s heart.

“Uh…yeah, why don’t you go to the dining room? I’ll go get that for you,” he rushed out of your grasp much to your worry and confusion.

You watched as he tensely walked away from you as though he were running out of time.

You were nervously swaying from leg to leg as your mind was focused on the files that were currently in your purse. While Jay was talking to Jake about something unbeknownst to you, you quickly excused yourself to head to the bathroom and as quickly as you could, you found the safe and managed to take the blackmail files.

The code was still engrained in your mind: 200402, Jay's birthday. It filled you with guilt knowing you were doing this without his knowledge, but you had to help your family in any way you could. You knew Jay would do almost anything for you, but his fear and love for his Mother were heavy; she was where he drew the line.

You didn't get to take a proper look at the files, but you were practically sweating at the thought of stealing something from one of the most dangerous women in the world. Gods, you hoped you didn't royally fuck this up.

At the other end of the manor, Jay’s mind was racing, and his hands were sweating, but he tried to calm himself until he saw the proof. When he entered the cellar, he immediately headed towards the dark brown cabinet behind where all the champagne was stored. His mother commonly kept her most dangerous weapons in there.

When he opened it, his heart dropped as he saw it. The one thing he never wanted to imagine. A vial half-filled with pink syrup, with a white label on the front of, ‘Philtre for the Love of My Son’. 

Jay was fuming, and he violently grabbed the vial before smashing the vial on the ground. He fell to the ground, his hands resting atop the shattered glass of the vial, not caring if his palms began to bleed slowly.

“Drink this.” Jay placed a glass of green-tinted liquid in front of you. You looked up at him and his look instilled fear in you. His eyebrows were furrowed and he was focused solely on the glass. He was furious. 

“What is it, baby?” You asked unsurely. 

“Just drink it.” He looked into your eyes and he was pleading, his eyes shining with a mixture of frustration and despair. It has always been so difficult for you to know what was going through his mind. However, you had an endless amount of trust in Jay and knew in your heart that he would never do anything to hurt you. 

You slowly took a swig of the drink. Once you gulped it all down, you keeled over at how disgusting it tasted. It tasted of bitter and unripe berries, sour and bitter. “Jay, are you trying to kill me?” You tried to make a sarcastic joke to help lighten the mood, but it didn’t seem to help. “What was that?”

“It was an antidote.”

“Antitode?”

“My mother poisoned you, Y/N.”

Your eyes flew open, in both shock and confusion. “I haven’t seen her in over a month how is that—”

“That is exactly when she did it,” Jay turned around and now his back was facing you. Even though you couldn’t see him, you could now tell the inner turmoil that was raging within him. 

Jay had been angry before, but never like this. “There is no such thing as pink champagne, Y/N. At least not in our house. What my mother gave you was…” He trailed off, dropping his gaze to the ground and sighing deeply.

“Whatever it was that she gave me it clearly didn’t work. I’m still alive.”

“You drank my mother’s philtre.”

“A philtre? You mean a—”

“A love potion, Y/N. Meant to artificially induce a feeling of love towards someone. That someone being me, obviously.” His voice was shaky at the end. It dawned on you what this all meant, and why on earth Jay was acting so odd and distant ever since you mentioned the champagne.

“Philtres aren’t real, Jay. That’s all just folktales, your mother was being stupid,” you said, but weren’t even sure if you believed it. As much as you didn’t want to think of his words as true, you knew Jay wasn’t a foolish man.

Jay shook his head, now turned once again to face you. His eyes were glassy now, and you noticed his hands were clenched. You couldn’t stand to see him in such a distressed state. 

“They are real, Y/N. They are all too real.”

You shook your head, not wanting to believe it for a moment. You knew magic and alchemy were a common practice in Olympus hundreds of years ago, but laws surrounding their usage have made them practically a myth.

Jay continued, “My mother never had the physical strength to physically hurt her enemies, let alone would she let blood stain her carefully chosen clothes,” his fists clenched, “so she resorted to poisoning them. Eventually, she realised that controlling people is much more powerful than simply getting rid of them.

She began following the recipes of ancient alchemists and eventually perfected them. It’s how she has so many powerful people under her thumb. Her logic was that if it’s not fear that makes them act in her will, she can just take away their will.

Philtres are another thing completely. I know her to be cruel but,” his voice cracked ever so slightly, “this is monstrous.” 

Jay felt disgusted with himself.

Tears began to fall on your cheeks as the reality of everything began to fall on you. He didn’t believe you to be in love with him, and this entire time he was using your unawareness and intoxication to his favour.

“I mean, I should’ve known. Why else would you have acted so differently after the dinner?” Jay asked. He remembered noticing your shift in demeanour, but a selfish part of him didn’t want to investigate further because he enjoyed your attention and your newfound love for him, as much as it made no sense. 

You immediately got up from your seat, rushing over to get in front of him and place your hand on his shoulder, “I am in love with you, Jay,” your voice was in heavy breathing, “I mean, this is insane. Why would your mom even do that? It makes no sense. She drank the champagne with me, so how did it only effect me? This must be a mistake.”

“That's not how alchemy works, Y/N. When you brew the potions, you can control exactly who will be intoxicated by it," Jay's fists were clenched in anger but his eyes shined with tears. "How could I have not known? She wants to control you. She wants it to hurt when she unleashes her fire on you because that would mean you would lose the love of your life,” he couldn’t look into your eyes. “I’m setting you free now.”

Your face fell, “No, Jay. You don’t mean that.”

“My mother is too much of a danger to you. I need you to leave.”

“I am not leaving, Jay. Please, I need you to understand I love you.”

“It is all fake. You never loved me, how could you love a monster like me?” He remembered the night he confronted your former lover. Sunghoon thought of Jay as an animal and an evil man, and Jay couldn’t help but agree with him now.

You cupped his face, your hands shaking violently, “Jay. Don’t leave me.”

“My mother hurt you, Y/N. I hurt you. I can’t keep having doing it.”

“You will hurt me if you leave me, Jay. I don’t know what your mother fed me but it didn’t matter because I love you. Nothing in that bottle measures up to the true love I have for you. Please believe me,” you said in between hiccups.

Jay gently grabbed the hands that were wrapped around his face, and put them back down, sighing in disappointment. “You have to go, Y/N. I can’t send you back to your family when my mother would just go after you, so I’ll go somewhere far and you can stay back at my manor,” you didn’t fail to notice how he didn’t say ‘our’ manor like he used to.

“Baby…” you trailed off, not knowing what to say. You could barely see anything with how thick the tears were that were flooding your eyes. “Baby, I don’t know what to do to make you believe me. Why can’t you believe that I love you?”

“Because there’s nothing about me that you could love,” his tone was of finality like he couldn’t bring himself to look or speak in your presence ever again. Your heart felt like it shattered, and your breathing became hard. 

Jay had to use all his strength to not come to you and hold you as you let your tears out on his shoulder, and instead picked up his phone.

You watched in despair as Jay turned away from you and placed his phone to his ear, “Jake, I need you to come take Y/N home,” he paused to hear Jake’s response, “No, I won’t be coming.”

[thefirstlioveyou]

byler confession is gonna be so intense and one of the most memorable scenes of the whole show because think about it: what other ship has been given such a build up to a confession?

mike still has to discover the painting lie - that's gonna be a very big plot point in s5 and going to cause some drama (i don't necessarily think mike is gonna be furious, just very regretful of what could've been if he'd known.)

mike and will have no faith that the other likes them at this point. mike's hopes probably died in the pizza place, will's died in the van. meanwhile other relationships in the show had a pretty mutual understanding that the other liked them before they finally got together.

IT'S GAY. they're both closeted gay boys in a small town in the 80s who struggle with internalized homophobia and shame. it's gonna be fucking beautiful to watch them finally find the courage to confess to one and other, risking so much.

with everything that's set up, mike and will's kiss/confession is bound to be one of the most memorable moments of the show for sure

[periwinkla]

Narumitsu/AA fic rec list No.1

---- Multi-chapter ----

pressure (pushing down on me) ApprenticeofDoyle | @apprenticeofdoyle https://archiveofourown.org/works/28440966/chapters/69694179

miles edgeworth's terrible, no-good, very bad week ApprenticeofDoyle | @apprenticeofdoyle https://archiveofourown.org/works/29390913/chapters/72203136 (this one isn't completed but please listen to my advice: a fic does not need to be completed to be enjoyable and/or give you necessary feelings) This author writes so beautifully, go read both!!! The first one has such cute and emotional moments and there's a scene in particular I will cherish most dearly for all of eternity. The second one follows as the title says Miles's most terrible misfortunes (aka AAI), so enjoy his very well written struggles.

The Miraculous Disappearance Of Phoenix Wright JJsADragon | @4ragon https://archiveofourown.org/works/15341994 This is Phoenix-centric, narumitsu is background - it's so beautiful and it's full of Phoenix drama and... hear me out... Godot!!! But, being serious here. This one really struck me. I don't know, I don't quite have the words to explain. You need to experience it yourself. But I can say that it made me rethink my whole perception of Phoenix's character. Vacation All I Ever Wanted JJsADragon | @4ragon https://archiveofourown.org/works/25088599/chapters/60774496 Same author as previous one and what can I say? It's gorgeous go read it. Also side note I actually laughed out loud at very very frequent intervals.

Saturation (ongoing) TiedyedTrickster | @greentrickster https://archiveofourown.org/works/20272603/chapters/48054286 Already talked about this previously....: It's a Miles-POV fic, sweet & cute, emotional, with an amazing sense of humor. The character relationships are chef's kiss. Absolutely brilliant all around.

The Things We Agree to Believe are True actual_goblin | @metaphorical-goblin https://archiveofourown.org/works/42658245/chapters/107157108 I think this is the kind of thing you need to read without any explaination whatsoever. It's just... an adventure, I would call it, and very very beautiful, so just jump in. There is one thing I can say though. If you like character exploration, to a degree that is frankly out of this universe, GO.

Kindred timepatches | @monimolimnion  https://archiveofourown.org/works/28852137/chapters/70772769 It's about Miles adopting Pess! And it makes him realize a few things. It's so so very heartwaming. Set during the 7y gap. I think whatever I say might spoil it so I'll just describe how it made me feel! Fuzzy. Warm. Sappy. Cozy like wrapped in a blanket in winter with a nice cup of cocoa in hand. ---- One-shots ----

pressed beneath the burden of proof harmony | @harmonization https://archiveofourown.org/works/57174151 So very very very well written - I love how the author describes thoughts and emotions... it felt like I was feeling them myself.

Trials, Texts, and Tribulations bluemoodblue | @blue-mood-blue https://archiveofourown.org/works/20590601 Just very very sweet and with such nice subtlety it made me scream internally-- I love subtle things.

A Boy at the Airport KrisseyCrystal (IceCreAMS) | @krisseycrystal https://archiveofourown.org/works/29741124 Kid Apollo + Wrightworth. cute too cute too extremely cute family feelings overload ---- my heart is flying away...

Code to My Heart SnowOnVenus | @legayllyblonde https://archiveofourown.org/works/57499360 Incredibly beautiful and the drawings made to accompany it are absolutely charming and so fitting to the story... I especially love how Edgeworth's character was explored here. This will forever be inprinted in my heart.

To be honest there are so many more so I will probably make more lists in the future, as I also need to reread things (I have terrible, terrible memory)... hence the '1' on the title.

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Marlene Dietrich (Shanghai Express, Witness for the Prosecution, Morocco)—Bisexual icon, super hot when dressed both masculine and feminine, lived up her life in the queer Berlin scene of the 1920s, central to the 'sewing circle' of the secret sapphic actresses of Old Hollywood, refused lucrative offers by the Nazis and helped Jews and others under persecution to escape Nazi Germany, the love of my life

Xia Meng, also known as Hsia Moog or Miranda Yang (Sunrise, Bride Hunter)—For those who are familiar with Hong Kong's early cinema, Xia Meng is THE leading woman of an era, the earliest "silver-screen goddess", "The Great Beauty" and "Audrey Hepburn of the East". Xia Meng starred in 38 films in her 17-year career, and famously had rarely any flops, from her first film at the age of 18 to her last at the age of 35. She was a rare all-round actress in Mandarin-language films, acting, singing, and dancing with an enchanting ease in films of diverse genres, from contemporary drama to period operas. She was regarded as the "crown princess" among the "Three Princesses of the Great Wall", the iconic leading stars of the Great Wall Movie Enterprises, which was Hong Kong's leading left-wing studio in the 1950s-60s. At the time, Hong Kong cinema had only just taken off, but Xia Meng's influence had already spread out to China, Singapore, etc. Overseas Chinese-language magazines and newspapers often featured her on their covers. The famous HK wuxia novelist Jin Yong had such a huge crush on her that he made up a whole fake identity as a nobody-screenwriter to join the Great Wall studio just so he can write scripts for her. He famously said, "No one has really seen how beautiful Xi Shi (one of the renowned Four Beauties of ancient China) is, I think she should be just like Xia Meng to live up to her name." In 1980, she returned to the HK film industry by forming the Bluebird Movie Enterprises. As a producer with a heart for the community, she wanted to make a film on the Vietnam War and the many Vietnam War refugees migrating to Hong Kong. She approached director Ann Hui and produced the debut film Boat People (1982), a globally successful movie and landmark feature for Hong Kong New Wave, which won several awards including the best picture and best director in the second Hong Kong Film Award. Years later, Ann Hui looked back on her collaboration with Xia Meng, "I'm very grateful to her for allowing me to make what is probably the best film I've ever made in my life."

This is round 5 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]

Xia Meng:

Marlene Dietrich:

ms dietrich....ms dietrich pls.....sit on my face

its marlene dietrich!!!! queer legend, easily the hottest person to ever wear a tuxedo, that hot hot voice, those glamorous glamorous movies…. most famously she starred in a string of movies directed by josef von sternberg throughout the 1930s, beginning with the blue angel which catapulted her to stardom in the role of the cabaret singer lola lola. known for his exquisite eye for lighting, texture, imagery, von sternberg devoted himself over the course of their collaborations to acquiring exceptional skill at photographing dietrich herself in particular, a worthy direction in which to expend effort im sure we can all agree. she collaborated with many other great directors of the era as well, including rouben mamoulian (song of songs), frank borzage (desire), ernst lubitsch (angel), fritz lang (rancho notorious), and billy wilder (witness for the prosecution). the encyclopedia britannica entry im looking at while compiling this propaganda describes her as having an “aura of sophistication and languid sexuality” which✔️💯. born marie magdalene dietrich, she combined her first and middle names to coin the moniker “marlene”. she was a trendsetter in her incorporation of trousers, suits, and menswear into her wardrobe and her androgynous allure was often remarked upon. critic kenneth tynan wrote, “She has sex, but no particular gender. She has the bearing of a man; the characters she plays love power and wear trousers. Her masculinity appeals to women and her sexuality to men.” in the 1920s she enjoyed the vibrant queer nightlife of weimar berlin, visiting gay bars and drag balls, and in hollywood her love affairs with men and women were an open secret. she was an ardent opponent of nazi germany, refusing lucrative contacts offered her to make films there, raising money with billy wilder to help jews and dissidents escape, and undertaking extensive USO tours to entertain soldiers with an act that included her a playing musical saw and doing a mindreading routine she learned from orson welles. starting in the 50s and continuing into the mid-70s she worked largely as a cabaret artist touring the world to large audiences, employing burt bacharach as her musical arranger.

First of all, there are those publicity photos of her in a tux. Second of all, I have never been the same since knowing that she sent copies of those photos to her Berlin lovers signed "Daddy Marlene." Not only is she hot in all circumstances, but she can do everything from earthy to ice queen. Also, she kept getting sexy romantic lead parts in Hollywood after the age of 40, which would be rare even now. She hated Nazis, loved her friends, and had a sapphic social circle in Hollywood. She also had cheekbones that could cut glass and a voice that could melt you.

Her GENDER her looks her voice her everything

“In her films and record-breaking cabaret performances, Miss Dietrich artfully projected cool sophistication, self-mockery and infinite experience. Her sexuality was audacious, her wit was insolent and her manner was ageless. With a world-weary charm and a diaphanous gown showing off her celebrated legs, she was the quintessential cabaret entertainer of Weimar-era Germany.”

The bar scene in Morocco awoke something in me and ultimately changed my gender

"Her manner, the critic Kenneth Tynan wrote, was that of ‘a serpentine lasso whereby her voice casually winds itself around our most vulnerable fantasies.’ Her friend Maurice Chevalier said: ‘Dietrich is something that never existed before and may never exist again.’”

"Songstress, photographer, fashion icon, out bisexual phenom (notoriously stole Lupe Velez and Joan Crawford's men, and Errol Flynn's wife, had a torrid affair with Greta Garbo that ended in a 60-year feud, other notable conquests including Erich Maria Remarque -yes, the guy who wrote All Quiet on the Western Front- Douglas Fairbanks Junior, Claudette Colbert, Mercedes de Acosta, Edith Piaf), anti-Nazi activist. Marlene was a bitch - she had an open marriage for decades and one of her favorite things was making catty commentary about her current lover with her husband, and her relationship with her daughter was painful- but she was also immensely talented, a hard worker, an opponent of fascism and the hottest ice queen in Hollywood for a long time."

"She can sing! She can act! She told the Nazis to fuck off and became a US citizen out of spite! She worked with other German exiles to create a fund to help Jews and German dissidents escape (she donated an entire movie salary, about $450k, to the cause). She looks REALLY GOOD in a suit. If you're not convinced, please listen to her sing "Lili Marlene". Absolutely gorgeous woman with a gorgeous voice."

Gifset link

"Bisexual icon and Nazi-hater. Looks absolutely stunning in the suits she liked to wear. 'I dress for the image. Not for myself, not for the public, not for fashion, not for men'."

"would you not let her walk on you?"

[tending-the-hearth]

everything i loved about "the little mermaid" live action

Ariel's melody being her siren song!! that little new bit of lore!! i also really liked that it added more depth as to why Ursula wanted her voice in exchange for her becoming human

the way Ariel became almost angry during the bridge of "Part of Your World", she was so frustrated that she couldn't do the things she was dreaming about, like YES let her be mad!!

full body chills during "Part of Your World" + the first reprise

Ariel helping Max onto the boat 😭😭😭

I've mentioned this before, but Ariel hearing Eric's voice before seeing him!!! hearing him sing before seeing him!!! agh!!!!

Eric holding Ariel's hand on the shore after she rescues him 😭

the detail put into each of Ariel's sisters was so stunning, i'm so excited to read more about them in the books! i loved that they each had their own specific vibe

THEY INCLUDED THE FACT THAT URSULA AND TRITON ARE SIBLINGS YES THANK YOU VERY MUCH

"For the First Time" being a voice over, as Ariel's thoughts, and then the scene shifting to complete darkness except for her to represent us being in her head and hearing her thoughts, and the way it gets cut off when she realizes she can't say "hello" to Eric? i cried

The Jodi Benson cameo and her giving Halle!Ariel the fork 😭 literally her passing on the mantel of Ariel 😭😭

Eric and Ariel being total nerds with each other??

The way Ariel "told" Eric her name using the constellations???? and him saying it was written in the stars???? hello????

Also Eric saying "my little mermaid" made me so soft wtf

Eric and Ariel running around and giggling in the castle and being the definition of puppy love like they're so goofy and in love i adore them

the "Part of Your World" reprise after Ariel sees Eric with Vanessa shattered my heart, the MOST heartbreaking song

Grimsby kicking the ring away after it falls near him, my man knew exactly what was going on, he's known Ariel for three days and is already a ride or die

just Ariel and Eric holding each other so tightly after she gets her voice back, and Eric refusing to let her go until Ursula literally has to throw him away

ARIEL BEING THE ONE TO KILL URSULA USING THE SKILLS SHE SAW ERIC USE OH MY GOD IT WORKED SO SO WELL

i like that they added a chunk of time passing between Ursula's death and Eric and Ariel reuniting, it added a little extra drama and emotion when they finally saw each other again!

listen i'm an absolute sucker for a "hug before kiss" reunion and i was SO happy that Eric and Ariel had that, it fit them and their relationship perfectly, the way Eric just clung to her, and Ariel's happy smile as she hugged him back 😭

The mermaid statue and the dress representing the land vs. the sea???? and both returning back to where they're supposed to be but having new meanings????

Ariel's wedding dress being pink to (probably) pay homage to her pink ballgown in the animated movie was such a good touch, and i loved the length!!

Triton and Ariel's goodbye, where he says "you shouldn't have had to give up your voice for me to hear you"???? hello my father issues jumped tf out and had me sobbing in the theater

literally the entire movie was so beautiful, i could talk about it for hours, this is the best live action remake honestly, and Eric and Ariel (specifically the live action version obvi) have moved up to become my favorite Disney Princess/Prince pairing, just behind Belle and Adam (bc let's be honest, nothing can top them)

@queen-with-the-quill bc i know you're seeing it soon! more things i forgot to tell you lol

[pr0cyon-lotor]

Au where it was all a ✨dream✨

A collective dream specifically, sorta....

Okay, we're dropped in a scene Shen Yuan is dying. He sacrificed himself to save Binghe from idk a demon attack or something. But he's Shen Qingqiu's husband because there was a previous courtship full of drama, misunderstandings, and eventually love.

So he's being held by Shen Jiu, and as Shen Yuan finally drops. The system pulls up for everyone saying something about how they had completed an exercise, before anyone can even blink all plot relevant characters just drop to the floor.

Anyway PIDW isn't important anymore, let's go to the modern world.

Shen Jiu wakes up in a hospital bed, his memories rushing back. He's... A historian— no, a modern day scholar?... he's renowned for his research papers... Ugh, the voices.

Shen Jiu is told he was in a plane crash that had hospitalized most of its passengers, which is better than the alternative. He asks if there's a Shen Yuan in the hospital, the nurse hesitates and asks why. Shen Jiu got that Shen Yuan is in the hospital but is probably either in bad condition or his family isn't allowed the staff to talk about him.

Shen Jiu says that they're married. The nurse hesitates and then says he is and he's doing worse than before and is in critical condition. Shen Jiu is left to stew over the information.

He is forced to go into physical therapy and all that stuff. He meets the other passengers and can clock each of them. From his Qi-ge to Mobei Jun. It was strange, to see them like normal people when he has a memory of them being greater than that.

They all talk and Shen Jiu takes note of their professions and connections. Once he recovers, he tries to visit Shen Yuan and is told he needs a proof of marriage.

And Shen Jiu being the spiteful and conniving motherfucker he is uses his recently made connections to gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss some legalized falsified documents of his and Shen Yuan's marriage, which was a year before the plane crash and their anniversary landed on the day of the crash. How unfortunate truly :,( (he totally didn't pick that day because that was the day they met so in his brain that was they day that led them to be together or anything)

So he shows the documents and then visits Shen Yuan each time he can. He does try to avoid his family and got good at remembering their schedules of visits. He always keeps his hand over Shen Yuan's chest, just so he can feel his heart beat so he knows he's still alive aside from the mechanical beep of the heart monitor.

The day Shen Yuan wakes up, it was during one of Shen Jiu's visits. He wakes up with Shen Jiu . He's still half delirious and still mixing things from his coma "dream" and real life. So he says:

"My husband will get upset if he sees you touching me like that on my chest."

Shen Jiu is amused and puts Shen Yuan's glasses on his face softly and says that he is his husband. Shen Yuan stares at his demure beauty of a husband, mouth agape. The heart monitor picks up and he just says "sup" which confirms to Shen Jiu that he is still the nerdy man he fell in love with.

Shen Jiu tells him they've been married two year by now and kisses his forehead. A nurse bursts in to make sure no one is like y'know dying and sees that Shen Yuan is up. She is shocked because for all intents and purposes he shouldn't have woken up yet. She shoos Shen Jiu away and tells him to wait outside.

The Shens are notified and they finally meet Shen Jiu. He manages to gaslight and charm his parents and siblings. He convinces them that Shen Yuan totally mentioned him and they were totally going to meet if not for the plane crashing. (Shen Jiu remembered when Shen Yuan and him were talking in the plane that he mentioned that he was visiting family. Shen Jiu was flying to speak in a convention or something but they don't need to know that.)

Once Shen Yuan fully awake, his family start worrying over him and then ask why he didn't tell them he was married. Shen Yuan, who did realize his husband was lying is going along with it, said he was going to but things (the plane crash) got in the way.

Anyway new Shen in the family. He probably likes Shen Yuan's little sister and mom.

[dwreader]

Emphasizing Louis's Beauty

I've talked previously about how Louis in the 2nd half of the season is rarely seen in suits anymore but what about the earlier episodes when he wears a wide array of colorful suits while he is still performing his role in human society? What stands out is how many vibrant colors and patterns we see him in vs. Lestat who is always in some kind of tan, gray or navy. A lot of this is simply historical record as vibrant colors were more typical of black male dress of the era and we see that Louis is trying to maintain appearances, but on the show his bright costuming always stands out from other background male characters black OR white (confirmed by the costume designer that his colors are like a flame drawing Lestat in) and the tailoring and color choices often stands in contrast to Lestat on screen next to him in a more traditional masculine (aka duller) color. I mean compare this to how romantic period dramas typically style the men and women.

Beyond the historical nods, which most tv viewers don't have detailed references to as there aren't many color images we have from that era, I think the show does a great job of connecting cultural references everyone can immediately pick up on (the Leydecker outfits were obvious examples). For example, if you think of a white stripey suit from the 1910s, the image that came to mind was probably Rose in Titanic. So even as Louis is projecting what was period standard masculinity, what the modern viewer is likely thinking of is a tailored suit worn by the female protagonist in one of the biggest movies of all time. These looks screams high fashion latest designs from Paris, decked out pampered princess of the ship ("prince of your district").

In the same vein, when you imagine an iconic green period costume you're probably thinking of Keira Knightley in Atonement. In fact if you google "green suit in period film" all the results are of women. Rarely are men put in these colors in period romances particularly. I mean I think they put Keira in that green dress simply because she looks incredibly beautiful in that color and that's also how I feel about Louis in his green outfit.

I've talked before about the use of red on Louis but looking at the actual context of when Louis wears red they are specifically scenes of lust (w/ Jonah), shame (the slutshamig w/ the soliders) or anger/revenge (killing the Alderman) and hello look at these!!

And this is really an exclusively female character trope where vivid color costuming is used to convey mood or emotion! When a man is angry or lustful in a film, he's never wearing red, he's just wearing a boring color like black or grey. Evil and goodness are conveyed by black vs. white costuming with men (i.e Lestat's evil black darth vader get up) but rarely any colors not on that b&w scale.

Also speaking of cultural references in costuming here's this again.

[phefics]

This just came to my mind while I was studying for my psychology exam - but what do you think THG would be like if they were dating a reader who is a theatre performer? Like them picking the reader up from rehearsals that ran overtime, watching their performances and listening to them talk about their crazy (and sometimes kinda weird) rehearsal memories?

I hope this makes sense because I am not too great with explaining things

this is so cute, not weird at all!! you didn't specify the guys so i'm gonna do all the characters i write for. hope you like!! xo

coryo is supportive, mostly because he likes the idea of dating someone who could be famous one day. he brags about your talents to people at school/work, and comes to every show, sits in the front row, and brings you roses. he admires your dedication, even when it means staying late to run scenes or crazy rehearsal stories.

finnick loves to watch you perform. he's been caught trying to sneak into your rehearsals before, and given you a sheepish grin as he's escorted out of the theater. he's just so captivated by you. as someone who has spent a lot of his life performing against his will, he loves to watch you flourish doing something you love. he loves hearing about cast drama, like straight up will make popcorn to listen to the gossip.

gale isn't super into theater but will be supportive! he likes that you have a hobby you're so passionate about, even if he doesn't understand. he tries to make every show when he isn't busy with work, and has terrible theater ettiquette the first time and keeps cheering every time you're on stage, so you have to explain that he can't do that, lol. he also picks you up from rehearsals because he won't let you walk home late at night, ever.

haymitch isn't very into the arts, in general - he's just never had an urge to consume it or have a hobby of his own. but seeing you feel so passionate about it and have so much fun opens him up to the idea a lot, and i can see him definitely going to your shows and finding the beauty in live theater.

johanna would be a stage crew girly, so i think she would participate in your theatre stuff (if it was local/small, i don't think she would pursue it as a career) and she does the lights or sound. definitely ignores directions so she can put the spotlight on you even when you aren't talking in a scene.

katniss is very supportive, but i don't see her being into theatre at all - she'll go to your shows but doesn't really vibe with it, so she's there to support you but wouldn't go if you weren't involved. if you are in a musical production, though, she will get the songs stuck in her head and whistle/sing them around the house.

lucy gray is probably also involved in theatre!! or, she at least totally understands your passion as well as your workload. if you do musical theatre, she helps you practice your songs and learns them on guitar so she can play them for you. she is always cheering so loud in the audience - she is so supportive and loving.

peeta would probably get involved in your production behind the scenes, painting sets. he is so supportive and i could even see him joining the show if you convinced him he'd be good - he's clearly a very charming actor and would probably find it fun. if he doesn't join you, though, he is in the front row of every single performance with flowers.

sejanus is the most supportive boyfriend ever, i swear. he will singlehandeldly fund your local theatre just so you can participate. he takes time off of work to go to every single show, and has flowers sent to you backstage. he helps you rehearse at home, always being a bit goofy and over-the-top when he reads the lines.

tigris would probably be involved as well, designing and altering costumes!! she loves to design and sew and having that outlet that benefits the community as well as her partner would make her really happy.

[milkyboybluewriter]

The Disappointing Case of Wendy Corduroy

Wendy Corduroy has a lot of potential, but too often is pushed to the side by a lot of fans, and even by her creator.  But not for lack of trying, or an interest in the character.  In fact, Alex’s idealised view of Wendy may have been her greatest obstacle in receiving a story of her own.  Dipper isn’t the only one who seems to consider her ‘the coolest person he knows.’

Wendy was inspired by the first girl who ever spoke to Alex Hirsch, as well as several people the creative team thought were cooler than them. These were likely special memories or people in order to base a fictional character on them.  But that puts her on a pedestal.  And when someone puts you up there, it’s hard for them to take you back down.  Either for fear of ruining you or concern that, when others look closer, they’ll be disappointed in what they see.

He wanted her to be a main character (in the same way Soos is, if not Stan, Dipper, or Mabel) but in many ways Wendy feels like a side character.  She never receives her own episode, and lacks the character arc that even some side characters like Pacifica and Robbie received.

Her family, her friends inside the Shack and out, her physical abilities and survival skills, the drama of being a teenager, not to mention being a resident of the weirdest place on Earth.  All of these can lead to a hundred stories across the spectrum.  So why do people not write more stories about her?

Maybe it’s because she wasn’t given the opportunity that others had.  

As a cool, older redhead, Wendy’s main role in the show was being Dipper’s crush.  Which already puts her at a disadvantage because it means they designed her purpose first, character second. In fact, this is probably why she changed so drastically from her vegan-hippie prototype seen in the Gravity Falls bible.  Everything from her boots to her hat has changed since then, save the way she makes Dipper’s heart go faster.  

Most of her appearances in season one featured this one-sided romance and Dipper’s attempts to impress her, which usually resulted in a morality lesson about being yourself and not doing dumb stuff to impress others.  Pretty standard cartoon crush territory.  But between the episodes, a real friendship bloomed. 

In The Time Traveller's Pig, she gives an indifferent shrug as she casually agrees to go to the fair with Dipper, yet before her injury - and in the timeline where she avoids it altogether - she’s shown to genuinely enjoy his company.  A couple of episodes later and she’s outright excited at the prospect of working alongside Dipper at the pool.  They have regular movie nights.  They crack jokes and tease the Shack’s customers.  Climb trees and play at the arcade.  Wendy spends more time with Dipper than any other character.  Which means she must care about him more than she does the rest.

The crush might be one-sided but the affection is not.

But in the DVD commentary of Into The Bunker, Alex Hirsch, Matt Chapman, and Rob Renzetti mention that fan feedback convinced them to end Dipper’s crush sooner rather than later, even supposedly having ‘KILL THE CRUSH’ as one of their main story goals for season 2.  Understandable.  The crush episodes weren’t always the best, and if it was always intended as an unrequited attraction then better to get it over with rather than draw it out.  And it’s a good lesson to have a young boy learn, especially around twelve.  Love and puberty are relatable, but no less frustrating for it.

Into the Bunker is my favourite episode for multiple reasons, not least for Wendy’s presence in it.  She shows off her friendship with Dipper in the cold open, reveals her lumberjack and fighting skills later, and shows she would be an excellent adventurer.  I see it as a prime example of What Could Have Been.  I especially adore the ending, where she lets Dipper down so gently, it’s a beautiful scene.  As sad as Dipper feels, he’s also been told by someone very special to him that he’s very special to her too.  Maybe not in the way he wants, but perhaps in an even more important way.  

I had high hopes after that episode.  I remember thinking this meant she would develop beyond just being his crush, especially now we’d seen her hold her own against the weirdness and danger.  I really wanted to see more of this adventurous, sensitive Wendy we’d missed in season one, and wanted her to be a regular companion and friend to the twins.

Wendy appears in 16 episodes in the first season, and 15 episodes in the second if you don’t split Weirdmageddon 3 into two.  In season one she appeared in but didn’t participate in the adventure of key episodes like Dreamscaperers or Gideon rises.  In season two, she joins the adventure in Society of the Blind Eye, The Last Mabelcorn, and the Weirdmageddon trilogy, but has limited interaction or story impact in most episodes, save Love God.   She only has what amounts to cameo appearances in Not What He Seems and Tale of Two Stans, two of if not the most important episodes of the series.  

Including each of the Weirdmageddon trilogy, she’s referenced via Dipper’s lingering crush six times, including episodes she doesn’t even appear in.  So, after Into The Bunker, Wendy goes from being Dipper’s crush to…his crush that appears less.  

Wow, they really failed that Kill the Crush mission, didn’t they?

Perhaps the biggest issue is that she is so keenly tied to Dipper.  I love the Dipper and Wendy relationship, I could write a massive essay on that alone.  But it is such an incredible waste that she didn’t get a chance to interact with the others nearly so often. Every other main character has relationships with others.  Soos has a father-son bond with Stan as well as a friendship with the twins.  Ford was introduced later in season 2 and still interacts with Soos and Fiddleford as well as his family.  It’s a hindrance to her character that most of her interactions were for Dipper’s arc, yet she received nothing of her own.  

Wendy spends some time with Mabel, trying to help her with boy trouble (not the best person to get dating advice from, Mabel) in Hand That Rocks the Mabel and Society of the Blind Eye, then goes along with the girls to keep them safe in Last Mabelcorn.  This lets us see her affection and big sister vibes don’t end with Dipper, and should have been explored far more.  Her interactions with Soos and Stan are also limited, mainly to the workplace.  Her only dialogue with Ford is one line in Journal 3.  

Yet we also never see her be by herself.  We never see her home life, or how she entertains herself away from her friends or work. She's always interacting with a main character or her group of friends.  No alone time or personal interests are seen beyond pranks and reading magazines to avoid work.

We even get to see Robbie Valentino’s home life and musical hobbies, but not hers.

This lack of independent material has even continued in the Book of Bill where two of her very limited mentions is in regards to Dipper being stuck on a tree and another is his search history.  Even her own dream is made into a joke at Dipper's expense.  Ten years later, and so much of her is tied to Dipper, specifically to mock his feelings for her.  I don’t know if that’s more insulting to Dipper or Wendy at this point.

Speaking of dreams, let’s get to another issue: her mother.  Who we know nothing about.  In a show so heavily focussed on mysteries, the fate of Mrs Corduroy is a question that’s been left hanging since season one and we have come no closer to an answer of any kind.  Even a direct question from fans on both the Alex Hirsch and Bill Cipher AMAs were answered so vaguely they told us nothing.  She’s no longer with her?  A Fountains of Wayne reference?  Even the Book of Bill’s reveal that Wendy dreams about her most nights says nothing.  Are these good dreams?  Nightmares?  Memories?  The implication is that she’s dead, yet not even that has been confirmed.  For all we know, Mrs Corduroy could be dead, missing, abandoned her family, or could be working on an oil rig for the summer.  Your guess is as good as anyone’s by this point. 

We know she’s Manly Dan’s oldest and his only daughter, but we didn’t even learn her brother’s names until a paste up sheet was released in 2017.  She barely shares a scene with any of them, and when it happens it’s in the background.  The only exception I can think of is their group hug in the Fearamid.  A tender moment which would have been so much better if we’d actually seen her engage with them beforehand.  Her lack of interaction is especially jarring considering her confession in Society of the Blind Eye:  "Okay, I'm not actually laid back. I'm stressed, like, 24/7. Have you met my family?"

Not really, no.  And for a show that’s about family as much as it is about mystery, it’s a shame that Wendy is let down in both areas.  

Even side characters like Robbie, Pacifica, and Grenda receive more character development, despite their limited importance or screen time.  In fact, it was recently pointed out to me that Archibald Corduroy, Wendy’s ancestor, is more integral to Pacifica than his own descendant.  Once again, Wendy’s interactions come up short, including from her own family.  

With the release of the Book of Bill, some people were hopeful that she might finally get some attention.  I wasn’t.  Personally, I think Bill simply has a low opinion of Wendy anyway since he called her a pushover in his AMA, so it can be fitting he doesn’t mention her often.  But it’s also the context of these mentions, and those on the website.  On Thisisnotawebsite.com she’s referred to twice - Her one contribution is a simple note where she pranks the reader.  Then she’s mentioned in Stan’s list of embarrassing moments.  

Ten years later and not only are her contributions incredibly minor, but they’re as much to do with other people as herself, if not more so.  She’s supposed to be a main character but she might as well be a cameo.

Her lack of representation is so bad, that I realised my friends were celebrating her being mentioned in The Book of Bill.  That’s how desperate we’ve become for Wendy material.  And I’m sick of it.   At this point, I’m anticipating a Wendy story as much as I am Winds of Winter.

Last month I was discussing some of my writing ideas with my father.  And he gave me a very hard truth: it doesn’t matter how good your ideas are, if you don’t act on them, they’re only ideas.  And he was absolutely right.  It doesn’t matter how great these ideas are in my head, if they’re only in my head then what good are they? 

Hirsch has been saying for years he’s wanted to do more with Wendy, but he hasn’t. Not in the show, the comics, or the other material.  Intentions, like ideas, are useless if you don’t do something about them.

I honestly hate how harsh this sounds.  I love Gravity Falls.  And I love Wendy.  And I believe Alex Hirsch does too, he just…doesn’t know what to do with her.  As he says in the Inconveniencing commentary: “We wanted to honour her so much that we couldn’t figure out the right episode with her because we didn’t want to mess her up.”  He’s put her on a pedestal just like Dipper did.  And I think she needs to come down so we can see how awesome she really is.

So, what can be done to fix this?  Well, when creators don’t have the time, interest, or ability to do something for a series, that leaves the fans to fill in the gap.  

I urge other Gravity Falls enthusiasts to try and give her the attention and character development she sorely deserves, especially now there’s a resurgence of activity and interest.  Draw or write her if you can, have her interact with other characters, not just be a crush, explore her depths.  And if you can’t, seek out those who have or can and ask their advice, or thank them for their work, offer encouragement.  For Wendy if not for them.

I want to leave this on a happier note and say that I’m going to follow this up soon with another essay, this time offering advice on writing Wendy.  Even talented writers I admire have surprised me by saying they struggle to write her, yet I’ve found it pretty easy.  So hopefully I can encourage other people to write her too.   

But if I could summarise what I want to see and what I think will help people write Wendy, it would be this: She’s not just Dipper’s crush, and she’s not just the cool girl.  She’s bigger than that.

She’s Wendy Flippin’ Corduroy and she deserves so much more.

Cheers, Milky Boy Blue

[ladykailitha]

Exit Eddie Pursued by a Steve Part 1

Hello and welcome to one-shot Saturdays, the day I put out short completed (most of the time) fics for you wonderful readers.

This week we have the completed Smut to Fluff fic I had been working on on WIP Wednesdays. This has three parts. I started writing part four last Wednesday but it got angsty and not where I wanted the story to go. So those extra bits have been saved for another story somewhere down the line that it fits better in.

18+ under the cut.

****

Eddie had been on his way to the band room for his weekly “meeting” of the Hellfire Club. They had to have in there this week due to the unfortunate fact that the school musical was currently being preformed and they actually needed the drama room closet.

Suddenly a gaggle of people came tearing out of the stage in a hurry. The last of which was someone in a large red wig and bright yellow dress. But Eddie knew those hazel eyes anywhere.

He let out a low whistle. “Looking gorgeous there, Harrington.”

Steve skidded to a stop in his kitten heels and turned to see who had cat-called him.

“Yeah?” Steve said to him under half-shut eyes. “You like what you see, Munson?”

Eddie gave an appraising glance up and down. “I do indeed.”

“Too bad I have to change out of it,” Steve teased.

Eddie shook his head sadly. “Now, why would you want to go and do a thing like that?”

Steve laughed. “Because I’m in the next scene, and I ain’t wearing this!”

Eddie laughed, too. “Damn shame.”

Steve looked around and then hurried over to him. “If you like it that much, meet me after the play.”

He winked and then gathered up his skirt and ran for the changing room.

Eddie was still standing there when Jeff, Gareth, and Brian came up behind him.

“Who was the broad?” Brian asked.

Eddie licked the top row of his teeth. “That was no broad, gentlemen. That was King Steve in a ballgown.”

“Wait, what?” Jeff asked, his face screwed up in confusion. “No way.”

“Oh yeah,” Eddie hummed. “And I’m pretty sure he just asked me backstage after the play for a little action.”

All three other boys turned to him in shock.

“Ain’t no way,” Gareth hissed. “It’s probably some prank to have the basketball team jump you or something.”

Eddie grinned. “Come on, boys. We’ve got dragons to slay before they kick us out of the band room, too.”

They all followed him to the band room, a little confused on what just happened.

*

Steve waited nervously after getting one of the orchestra to help him back into the dress. The wig and makeup were gone, as were the shoes. Those things pinched.

His dress swished back and forth as he paced, wringing his hands.

“Oh.”

Steve stopped pacing and turned to the open door. Eddie stood there with an expression that Steve couldn’t quite make out.

“I have to know before we do this,” he rambled. “Are you wanting to do this because you thought I was beautiful as a girl? Or because you thought I looked beautiful in the dress?”

Eddie paused for a moment. “That is a very important distinction and one you are right in asking, sweetheart.”

Steve blushed deeply.

Eddie crowded his space and lifted his chin gently, “You look beautiful, Stevie.”

He gasped and Eddie dived on in, pressing their lips together. Instantly, Steve’s tongue tangled with his.

Eddie pulled away reluctantly. “We are definitely doing this.”

Steve nodded. “Just try not to get anything on the dress itself, otherwise I’ll be murdered by the drama teacher.”

Eddie chuckled darkly. “You’ve got it, babe.”

*

When Eddie walked in the room, Steve appeared coy. Shy even. And then when Steve asked why he was interested in fucking him in that dress, he suddenly got it.

“Anyone ever take care of you, Stevie?” he murmured, slowly pulling up the folds of the dress to get at those delicious thighs.

Steve shook his head. “I’ve only had sex with girls. They tend to expect you to do all the work.”

“Oh, darlin’,” Eddie cooed. “I’m going to make you feel so good, baby.”

Steve threw his head back and moaned as Eddie caressed the sides of his thighs.

“That’s it,” Eddie purred, mouthing along the expanse of Steve’s neck, “you sound so good.”

He tucked the dress behind his beautiful cock and sank to his knees.

Steve’s hands immediately buried into Eddie’s hair, pulling him all the way onto his cock.

Eddie lifted one of Steve’s legs and tucked it over his shoulder. He took the spit and slick from his blowjob and coated his fingers.

He pressed one finger into Steve and the boy let out the most delicious sounds.

Eddie wished he could swallow them up, but he would have to settle for swallowing Steve down entirely.

He continued to open Steve up and suck him off. Suddenly Steve was coming in ribbons down Eddie’s throat.

Eddie stood up and kissed Steve dirtily, mouth still slick with his cum.

Steve let out a low whine, taking in as much of Eddie as he could.

Eddie gathered up the skirt of the dress and pressed into to Steve’s hands. “Hold on tight to that, darling. We don’t want to get anything on it, right?”

Steve nodded.

Eddie lined himself up and slowly pierced Steve’s ass.

“Eddie!” he cried. “Oh god!”

Eddie took that as encouragement and slid all the way to the hilt.

Steve wanted to gripped the back of Eddie’s shirt and fist his hair, but his hands were occupied by the skirt of his dress. He held on tight, barely holding on as Eddie fucked him wildly.

Soon Eddie was coming into Steve, in rough, hopeless waves.

Steve let out a breathless sigh. “God, oh fuck.” He moved to lower his hands but Eddie stopped him.

“We need to get you out of this dress first, darlin’,” he murmured into Steve’s ear, “then you can lower your arms, all right?”

Steve nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, okay.”

Eddie giggled at how far gone Steve was. He removed the dress and hung everything up their proper places, while Steve laid there prone, panting for air.

Once Steve was able to catch his breath, he asked, “How did you know where everything went?”

Eddie turned back to him with a grin. “This is where my club meets for D&D. Hellfire, ever heard of it?”

Steve nodded. “I’ve got these kids I babysit that love that game. It’s all they’ve been talking about when it comes to picking out classes and clubs for next year.”

Eddie raised an eyebrow and sat down to watch Steve clean up himself and get dressed. He wondered where it was all going to go from there. Would Steve throw him out? Punch him? Mock him?

“I think you’ve ruined me for anyone else,” Steve muttered darkly as he ran his hand through his hair. He stood there in sweatpants and ratty old sweater, looking every bit as beautiful as he had in the dress.

Eddie grinned. “Yeah, big boy? How’s that?”

“I don’t think I’ve come so hard in my life.”

Eddie cackled. “Right back atcha, sweetheart.”

Steve blushed and walked over to stand between Eddie’s legs. “We’ve had dessert, what would you say to a late dinner?”

Eddie smiled up at him and then pulled him down for a kiss. “Sounds perfect, Stevie.”

*

“I call bullshit,” Brian said the next morning at their lockers when Eddie told them. “There is no way you sucked Harrington’s dick.”

“Did a slight more than that, Bri,” Eddie crowed.

Jeff frowned. “Prove it.” He jutted his chin across the hall. “There’s your boy as you say. Go get him.”

“And even if it is true,” Gareth growled. “There is no way he’d associate with you in the middle of the whole fucking school. He’s going to break your heart and we’ll have to pick up the pieces.”

“Watch and learn, boys,” Eddie said.

He strutted across the hall to Steve and placed his hand on the locker by Steve’s head.

Steve turned around. “Oh, hey, Eddie.”

Eddie smirked. “Morning, princess.”

Steve leaned against the lockers and laughed. “I’m the ugly step-sister, remember. Not the princess.”

“You were as pretty as one last night,” Eddie teased.

Steve grinned and put his arms around Eddie’s neck. “Hmm...that kind of talk is what got us in that position in the first place.”

Eddie grinned right back, putting his hands on Steve’s waist. “You saying flattering works on you, sweetheart?”

Steve cocked his head to the side. “I’m saying it doesn’t hurt.”

They kissed.

“Am I going to see you at lunch?” Eddie asked, pressing their foreheads together.

Steve shook his head. “You have first lunch and I have second.”

“So cruel,” he murmured, his thumb rubbing a patch of bare skin between Steve’s jeans and where his sweater had risen up because of his arms around Eddie’s neck.

“I’ll see you after school, okay?”

Eddie nodded. “It’ll be torment until I see you again.”

“For me, too,” Steve breathed.

And then Eddie was digging his fingers into Steve’s sides, tickling him.

“Eddie!” Steve protested, laughing.

Eddie leaned forward and kissed the smile off his face. “Later, Princess.”

“Later, Eds.”

Eddie turned and walked away.

“Eddie!” Steve called out. “Catch!”

Eddie managed to catch whatever it was on sheer instinct. He looked at it to see that it was Steve’s varsity basketball ring.

“Hold on to that for me,” he said with a smile. “It’s special to me.”

Eddie saluted and practically skipped back to his friends.

Steve laughed, shaking his head fondly.

****

Part 2 Part 3

@spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @artiststarme @swimmingbirdrunningrock @gregre369 @pyrohonk ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @chaoticlovingdreamer @goodolefashionedloverboi @messrs-weasley @maya-custodios-dionach @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @danili666 @carlyv @rozzieroos @wonderland-girl143-blog @justforthedead89 @emly03 @bookworm0690 @itsall-taken @bookbinderbitch @redfreckledwolf @littlewildflowerkitten @vecnuthy @scheodingers-muppet @mira-jadeamethyst @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @genderless-spoon @yikes-a-bee @anne-bennett-cosplayer @awkwardgravity1

[saffron-words]

Introduction and UtsuKare Translations Master Post

Some of you might recognize me as that Russian translator of Utsukushii Kare books from Wattpad. I decided to revive my tumblr to compile all the links and explanations here for those of you, MBM fans, who can't wait for official English releases of the books.

I could never keep a blog, so for now here I'll just tell how it all came about, and you can find links to all my MBM translations at the end (feel free to just skip the wall of text). So a couple of years ago I finally bowed down and decided to read Utsukushii Kare series in Japanese for language practice, even though I found the summary unappealing and I'm generally suspicious of overhyped media (as far as BL novels go, these books seemed to be The most hyped-up series in Japan). Much to my surprise, I loved it so much it was hard to move on. And while I waited for a chance to buy book 3 and Interlude, I gobbled up everything else related to the series that I could. The manga was only just starting, I didn't like dramaCDs (but I'm in the minority), and the drama somehow revived my love for watching Jdramas, even though I thought that this part of my fandom life has been over for years. When the second season started airing, I made a new friend in the Russian-speaking parts of the Internet who was even more obsessed with MBM than I am, and we fangirled to our hearts' content. At some point I promised her to translate the big sex scene from the end of book 3 as a gift for all the talks. I did, and since back then there was nothing for book 3 in any European language, as far as I know, I decided to post it online and give a link to English-speaking UtsuKare fans too. And since Wattpad doesn't allow copying text, and the browser translator feature from Google Translate was really inadequate, I also put up a link to the translation made with Deepl. As far as machine translators go, it is noticeably more comprehensible, and I didn't have the time (or skills to do the book justice, really) to translate it to English myself. Anyway, after this excerpt I thought I could manage one more important scene from book 3, then one more, and then I finally gave up and started translating it properly from the beginning. I also started correcting mistranslations in Deepl-versions that I kept doing for English readers, so some parts of the book are now much more readable than others. Now the third book is done and I started to work on book 2, Nikurashii Kare. I also translated several stories from Interlude and plan to do at least one more, but that is put on the backburner for now since I want to do as much of the book 2 as I can before book 4 in the main series comes out. Yes, we're getting a new Hira and Kiyoi book! This year too, probably. And unless it completely disappoints me or something terrible happens IRL, I plan to translate it as well.

So here are the links to everything I've translated from My Beautiful Man book series:

Book 3 "Nayamashii Kare" which continues the story past the movie (completed). The text is in Russian, but there are links to decent machine translations to English at the beginning of each part (I've also run through most of them and corrected the mistranslations). Or you can use the in-browser translation feature, but the results would be less readable.

Book 2 "Nikurashii Kare" which was technically turned into season 2 of the drama and the movie, but the script has deviated so much from the book, at times it's like a completely different story (in progress; about 1/4 of the book will be done with the next update which I plan on posting soon). I don't make Deepl translations for this since the official English release will be out in a couple of months.

Stories from other books in the series. The first part is a short scene from Nikurashii Kare, and the rest are stand-alone stories from Interlude. One of them had also been translated to English by Mauli before, but I didn't use her version when working on mine. The rest of the stories have never been translated by anyone else, as far as I know. These, too, have links to Deepl-versions at the beginning.

Disclaimer: my Japanese is not yet really on a level good enough to translate fiction, and there are bound to be mistranslations even if you read the original Russian versions. But I'm cross-checking myself on everything to try and keep those mistakes to minor things. I also know how to translate so I made sure that the text flows well, doesn't feel choppy and retains the same vibe that I get from reading the original.

[eddiediazismyhusband]

rant/vent post bc im exhausted and my brain won’t stop buzzing about this:

you know i find it mildly infuriating that tim had time to address the karaoke scene debacle bc of twitter fans, but he doesn’t have time to addresss the fact that since the start of s7 there have been fans who have been spouting hateful rhetoric about poc cast/characters and sending death threats to other fans, crew members, and journalists for not supporting their lukewarm ship, and he also for some reason is trying to remain on this high horse of “representation” when that is probably one of the weakest character sexuality storylines i’ve seen, and not only that but he decided to make the entire second half of the season practically dedicated to the pain of poc, as well as exploiting racial stereotypes for cheap drama….. all of this while these fans are acting like this guy who came out of nowhere (something that has literally been admitted by tim) is somehow this holy grail of a character when his emotional range is less than the “😐🧍” emojis, and tim is simultaneously ignoring the hate and blatant racism from the fans, but also promoting and giving a storyline to a racist character— even going as far as to brush that racism under the rug narratively, as well as allowing the actor to rile up controversy and division amongst fans

this is why it is so hard for me to trust tim anymore because that man has not shown to ke that he actually cares about good storytelling, he just cares about money going into his pocket.

now, no i don’t believe he is out here DM-ing fans s8 spoilers because the man is a moneymaker not an idiot, so before you try to say anything about me saying i believe bree, i most certainly do not— but unfortunately i don’t trust tim to handle any of the storylines he’s set up for s8 well until i see it.

and most of all i feel awful from ryan and oliver who want nothing more than to tell such a beautiful story but they are constantly being mowed over by tim, by the network, and now by the fans… oliver really wanted to do something with buck’s story, and all it’s done is caused a group of batshit fans to spread hate to other fans for not jumping ship after 6 years. ryan is so exhausted of having to rehash the shannon shit every season even though we’ve been given plenty of evidence to show that he has moved on from her— this storyline wasn’t necessary (and especially not the way they chose to tell it).

and lastly— oliver and ryan have wanted the fans to be happy. they want buck and eddie to be happy. and right now, neither of them are in a narratively satisfying spot, and until the show actually cuts the bullshit and starts doing something with their storyline and not just exploiting it, I’m not gonna support it by watching. they’ve shown they don’t care about queer rep by making half of a popular ship canon by bringing back a former character who was literally racist and misogynistic just to serve a character arc, and haven’t gotten rid of him despite having an entire half of a season to do so. they’ve shown they don’t care about queer rep by giving the bisexual main character a sexuality arc that lasted 0.2 seconds narratively and had him end up with the first guy who kissed him, despite there being zero chemistry or build up to imply there were ever actually any feelings of interest. they’ve shown they don’t care about queer rep by once again putting the show’s two black queer women through the same storyline they’ve had before, rehashing their trauma once again in an arc that didn’t even carry over because it was mostly resolved after 3 episodes. they’ve shown they don’t care about queer rep by saying that they wanna “do the story naturally” if they make eddie queer, yet they ignore every opportunity they have to do do by (literally) digging up his ex wife at every turn despite having written numerous lines of dialogue in which he blatantly admits to not actually loving her romantically, and stating that their marriage only happened because she got pregnant.

season 7 had the potential to be something great. it turned out to be mid.

season 8 also has the potential to be something great. until it starts looking like it im not gonna waste my time, energy, or sanity forcing myself to watch- especially if they’re just going to continue the blatant fan service bullshit after telling buddie fans for 6 years that they “don’t wanna do fanservice”….. well what the fuck do you call this dumpster fire, tim?

we may get some more information once filming starts that will change my mind, but right now it’s really not worth it after spending 7 year watching this show to just continue to be spat on and slapped in the face by the creators.

sincerely, an emotionally and physically exhausted fan who just had a long day and desperately needs to take my anxiety meds and crash