#this mindset has been how I always managed to have money in case my dog got sick

[ayakashibackstreet]

On the one hand, I have 20 PLN left before I get my scholarship in like, two weeks, so I shouldn't spend money

On the other hand, I want a snacc Right Now

[keanureevesisbae]

Mister Cavill, your dog is kinda fat - Chapter 3

Summary: Veterinarian Olivia Tran has zero time for bullshit. After becoming a mom at age twenty three, the one thing she wants is a good life for her daughter Vanessa. Her ex didn’t want anything to do with her nor the baby and she decided that man are officially banned out of her life. But then she meets Henry Cavill at her clinic and her ban slowly starts to crumble apart. Henry on the other hand is looking for one thing: a family. And when he meets Olivia Tran, he finds just that.

Henry Cavill x Olivia Tran (ofc)

Warnings: None

Wordcount: 3.9k

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It’s still beyond me that I told the famous actor Henry Cavill that his dog is kinda fat. The entire time from three till six a.m. was a dream to be honest. I noticed the second he walked in how handsome this man looked, not realizing he was Henry Cavill, though I thought he looked familiar. His curls were disheveled, his coat hung open and he looked pretty out of it, something that is completely understandable. However, he wasn’t just a snack—this man is a full course meal.

When he placed his dog on the examination table and stared at Kal with that concerned look on his face, was also the exact moment I felt something crumble deep inside of me. The aversion I had against all men (minus the one and only Keanu Reeves of course) was falling apart. I felt so stupid for thinking about him and how handsome he looked. Two days later, I still feel stupid.

He is a client with a dog who was sick. Had the other clinics picked up, I wouldn’t even know how handsome he was in real life. And on top of that, he is not just any client. He is Henry Cavill. The Henry Cavill, with an ass that looks good on screen, but even better in real life.

Yes, I looked. I’m still a person with a pulse who lets her mind wander from time to time and his butt definitely is part of my dreams nowadays.

Though I let my fantasies take me to certain places with Henry, I couldn’t help but turn into a soft pile of mush, as I watched him hold Vanessa in his thick arms, allowing her to play with his curls. I watched him listen intently as she started counting from one to hundred. He listened from the first number to the last and seemed genuinely impressed.

It’s rare to find a man who is willing to give a young child his full attention. In those six years I’ve been raising Vanessa, he is the first one that I encountered that is like that.

A quick Google search while he was chatting with Vanessa told me he was single. Somehow I stumbled upon multiple articles saying that he really wants a family of his own.

My mind almost wanted to think about how maybe… He could become someone important for Vanessa, because he was such a natural and the older Vanessa gets, the more I think that she needs a male figure in her life. Since she has reached the age of five, she has been bugging me about having a dad. The years prior to that moment, I was perfectly capable of being both the mother and the father. At least that’s what I thought. I came to the bitter conclusion that I’m her mother and that is it.  

But then I also realized that I should keep one one thing in mind:

Henry Cavill is dying to have a family of his own.

And Vanessa is not his own.

I want to think about something else, but I can’t. I simply can’t stop thinking about Henry Cavill and his strong arms. I’m convinced I was hallucinating when I thought he was flexing his arm muscles, when he carried Kal.

When I told Belle about this, she began rambling something about how that man oozes family man and how he makes her ovaries shake and ache for babies. I shrugged it off, thinking she was being ridiculous, but now…

I never thought I’d meet someone else. I knew that I’d be raising Vanessa by myself, though I secretly wished she wasn’t born to a single mom, who obviously had no idea what she was doing. I wished that she was born into a happy family, with a mother, a father, siblings, uncles and aunts and grandparents, but that wasn’t the case, so I tried my best to give her the best life I could possible provide for her.

And I shouldn’t think about Henry Cavill like that. I know for a fact that he has already forgotten about me and my daughter.

However it’s hard to forget about him. Especially since Vanessa can’t shut her mouth about how amazing Superman is and how he is the strongest man on earth because he carried his overweight dog into the clinic with no problem.

Vanessa and I walk back home, after I picked her up on Monday. ‘Nobody believed I met Superman,’ she says. For a second I’m afraid she is defeated, but then she simply shrugs. ‘But I know better than that.’

That’s my girl. ‘Very good, sweetie.’

‘Miss Sue send me out of class today,’ Vanessa then says.

‘Why?’ This isn’t the moment to become the overprotective mother goose. This is the moment to let her tell me in all honesty what happened.

‘I wasn’t doing what she told me to do. We had to read four pages out loud with the class, but Nicky is really slow, so I read the next page by myself, while I wasn’t supposed to.’

‘But why did she send you out?’ I ask.

‘Because I did it four times.’

‘Right,’ I say. What do I say about this? I understand my daughter completely, because I used to do the same. Besides, I think miss Sue is a bit uptight to be honest. I don’t like miss Sue. She’s always pretty condescending to me, probably because she’s ancient and thinks a child should have both a mother and a father, like the perfect housewives do.

I really hate every parent who has a kid going to that school, but on top of my hate list, is miss Sue.

When Vanessa senses my lack of reaction, she says: ‘I made you another drawing.’

I prepare myself for the well known drawing, that I can dream by now, but all the air is knocked out of my lungs when I see what she drew me today. I stop in the middle of the curb, earning me some annoyed groans from two old ladies who were apparently walking behind me, but I don’t care. I really couldn’t care less at the moment.

Oh my God, what is it with this kid and desperately wanting a father?

Okay, now I get that she wants a dad, I do, but did she honestly have to draw a Superman and a dog (where she wrote underneath KAL) inside of our house? Superman stands next to me and she tried to make it look like Superman and I are holding hands.

Oh my God, what goes on inside Vanessa’s head?

‘What did you draw?’ I ask her, though I know exactly what she drew.

‘My new daddy.’ She smiles, revealing the empty gap where her tooth was this morning, but it fell out during recess today. It’s her third tooth and I’m too much of a realist to tell her about the Tooth Fairy, since I had severe nightmares about that. She doesn’t care about the Tooth Fairy being fake (but she had to promise me to play along when kids in school talked about it), only about the money that I have to give her.

‘Your new what?’ I ask her.

‘My new daddy,’ she says. She pretends like she is talking to an idiot, but that attitude is apparently something she saw me doing and made it a personality trait of herself, since Belle once said that she is just as sassy as I am.

‘You can’t just declare every man you meet as your new dad,’ I tell her.

‘But I haven’t asked for a new daddy in so long,’ she says and to be fair, that’s true. The only thing she does, is draw me the same picture daily with the exception of today. ‘I want Superman to be my new daddy.’

‘It’s an impossible wish.’

‘But I want him as my new dad,’ she says, stomping her foot on the ground.

This is the moment she chooses to have a temper tantrum? Great, just what I need after a long day of not putting one pet to sleep, but three. ‘Vanessa, I’m not having this conversation with you. That man is not going to be your new dad.’

Am I telling her this or myself?

‘Why not?’ she whines.

‘Because not every man you like can be your new dad, so that includes Henry.’

Vanessa starts to pout, but I turn away, not being able to look at her when she looks like that, because if she stares at me with that face for a little too long, I’m breaking into the office to look for Henry’s number, so I can call him and literally ask him to be Vanessa’s new dad.

Goodness gracious, what is happening to me? What happened to my strong independent woman mindset? I don’t need a man, like the Pussycat Dolls told me growing up and I don’t need them for anything. I have managed to become a great veterinarian and a pretty okay mother, without the help of family. I’ve done so much, but I’m willing to let all that go, just so I can have one more glance from Henry. Just one more smile from him.

A bark pulls me out of my thoughts and I look over my shoulder. I not only see the chubby American Akita, but also his owner. Henry looked handsome Saturday morning, but he looks even hotter today. He wears a dark blue jeans that shows the world how thick his thighs really are and a cosy sweater, but not a coat, since men are apparently too cool to wear coats in the beginnings of autumn.

Henry notices us and holds up his hand, while a wide smile creeps on his face. Vanessa wants to rush towards him, but I grab her arm before she can run away. Seriously, my mom reflexes are no joke. Today, when a salamander wanted to wander around the examination table and nearly fell off, I caught him just in time, while I had my back turned to him. The nine year old boy to whom the weird pet belonged to, almost cried out of happiness because I saved his salamander from breaking his neck. ‘Not a word about the new dad thing,’ I tell her sternly.

She nods, recognizing the look on my face and knowing that I mean it. I let her go and when she is close enough, she jumps in Henry’s arms. He catches her easily and I hear him say: ‘What a greeting, miss Vanessa,’ followed by a lovely chuckle of his.

This girl really needs a male figure in her life, I think to myself and if it were up to me, that role model is going to be Henry Cavill.

‘I missed you, Superman,’ she tells him and I have to resist the urge to bring up the new dad thing myself.

‘I missed you too,’ Henry says to her and that earns him a kiss from Vanessa on his cheek.

There is this saying that the only ones that tell the truth, are drunk people and little kids. What if Vanessa is right? What if this man should be her new dad? She always drew a man with a dog, outside of our house.

I never saw her with another man like this. Belle’s brother is nice, of course and they are best buddies, but it was never like this. This look Henry and Vanessa share with each other.

Vanessa wiggles herself out of his strong arms to cuddle Kal, who looks a lot livelier than he did a few days ago. He excitedly wags his tail. ‘Doctor Tran,’ Henry says to me when I walked over to the three of them.

‘Please, call me Olivia,’ I tell him. ‘We’re not in the clinic.’

‘Right.’ Henry has a faint blush on his cheeks. Is it because of me or did my child say something to him that embarrassed him when she hugged him?

‘How is Kal doing?’ I ask, scratching the big dog behind his ear, while Vanessa pets his back. ‘He looks a lot better than he did on Saturday.’

‘Yeah, I’m giving him the meds you gave me and he has been his normal self again. I also bought some Purina One and he seems doing really well with the sudden change of kibble.’ Henry clears his throat and he says: ‘It’s hard not to give him as many snacks as I want to, but I’m trying my best.’

‘Oh, you’re that kind of owner,’ I smile, before shoving my hands in my pockets. ‘Well, he looks happy and better than Saturday, so that’s good.’

I honestly have no idea what I can say to him, so for the first time in forever, I’m hoping Vanessa can break the ice here. I just pray she doesn’t force us to sing that Moana song, because that girl will get her way, especially when it comes to singing songs. I once had to sing “Love is an Open Door” (both Anna’s and Hans’ part) to her, when she locked herself in the bathroom at the library because something scared her.

Our eyes meet for a second and it’s like she understands me without words. ‘Mister Henry, what were you doing out here?’

Very good, Vanessa.

‘I was walking Kal,’ he says to her, crouching down so he doesn’t tower over her.

That’s adorable and all of the sudden I understand that shaking ovaries comment Belle made a whole lot better. I’m willing to give this man the family he wants, but I need to stop thinking right now.

‘We will walk with you.’

I wasn’t hoping for that kind of ice breaker. ‘Sweetheart,’ I say to her, ‘we can’t just say that. Maybe he has an appointment or something else that is important.’

‘I don’t mind,’ Henry on the other hand says, completely disregarding my parental efforts. ‘We could use some company actually.’

While my common sense is telling me that this isn’t a great idea (he is a client at the clinic, he just wants to get into your pants, he is just being nice), my heart is pounding like crazy, loving this idea.

‘Please, mommy.’ Vanessa folds her little hands together and pushes out her bottom lip, blinking her eyes like she’s some sort of puppy. This kid knows what she’s doing, because the chance I’m saying no now, is basically non existent.

‘Okay, sure, but you stay close now. No wandering off. If you want to go somewhere, ask me.’

‘We can go to a nearby park,’ Henry suggests. ‘Kal can run free if he wants and we can keep an eye on them.’

We can keep an eye on them. Don’t start hyperventilating now, Olivia Tran. ‘Sounds like a plan.’

Vanessa squeals and walks in between us, holding not only my hand, but also Henry’s. Oh my, we look just like one happy family, especially when I look to my side, to see that the most gorgeous looking man on the planet earth, is already looking at me, flashing me a beautiful smile.

Secretly I hope that we run into some parents from school, miss Sue or even my parents. I’m really tempted to rub this in everyones face, though it’s probably only a once in a lifetime moment.

‘Mister Henry,’ Vanessa says, ‘my mommy had to kill two cats and a dog today.’

‘Not kill,’ I quickly correct her. ‘I had to put them to sleep, remember? Those animals were old and sick and they needed a little help to go to heaven. I don’t kill them.’ I look at Henry again, who seems amused. ‘I really don’t.’

‘I believe you,’ he laughs. ‘You just tell owners their pets are fat.’

I involuntarily let out a laugh. ‘You are the first one in two months with a fat pet, so I just save it for the famous actors with who can’t say no to their chubby dogs.’

Henry licks his lips, before he sinks in this top teeth in his bottom lip. Goodness gracious. Next time I run into Henry Cavill, I should bring some extra pair of panties.

Olivia, that is terrible, I shouldn’t think like that.

My daughter is here for crying out loud.

‘Mommy, have you seen a cuter dog today?’

‘Cuter than Kal you mean?’ I ask her.

‘Mhm.’

I chuckle. ‘Well, I’ve seen cute dogs, but no one is as cute as Kal.’

‘I think so too,’ Vanessa says. She pulls her hand out of mine, before holding out her arms for Henry.

I want to tell her that she can’t just expect him to carry her, simply because he is strong and he is Superman, but without any difficulties he lifts her up with only one arm. If I tried that, I’d dislocate my shoulder, but obviously it’s a piece of cake for him. I spend my fair share on Pinterest and YouTube, admiring his arms. And that clip of him building that PC? That was the hottest thing on earth and is nearly illegal.

‘I lost a tooth today,’ Vanessa says, showing off her teeth, probably sticking her tongue through the gap.

‘Wow, that is awesome,’ Henry says, leaning in to check if there is already a new tooth coming in. ‘You’re going to put it underneath your pillow, so the Tooth Fairy can give you some money?’

I can feel Vanessa’s hesitation. She looks over her shoulder and ushers me to get closer. ‘Mommy,’ she asks, still loud enough for Henry to hear, ‘should I tell him the truth?’

‘About what?’ I ask her.

‘He still believes in the Tooth Fairy.’

I bite my lips, to prevent myself from laughing out loud. ‘I think you should tell him.’

She nods and wraps an arm around Henry’s neck. ‘Mister Henry,’ she says, ‘the Tooth Fairy doesn’t exist. Mommy just gives me money when I lose another tooth.’

Henry looks at me, also visibly holding in a laugh. ‘The Tooth Fairy doesn’t exist?’ he ask in almost believable disbelieve, but then I remember: this man is an actor. ‘Are you serious?’

‘Mhm.’

‘I need to call my mother, to ask her why she lied to me all those years?’

Vanessa shakes her head. ‘Well, lots of kids still believe in the Tooth Fairy, so it’s okay that you did too.’

‘It was just time for you to know the truth,’ I add.

‘Well, thank you, miss Vanessa,’ Henry says. ‘Thank you for being honest with me.’

We arrive at the park and Henry and I sit on a park bench, while Kal runs wild, followed by a giggling Vanessa. I flinch a few times, thinking Kal is too wild to be playing with Vanessa, but he actually tones down a bit, checking in with her to make sure that she’s alright.

‘You have a sweet dog,’ I admit, not being able to look at Henry just yet. He is really close, I can almost feel the heat he is radiating through my coat, right onto my skin.

‘Yeah, he is sweet.’

‘And fat.’

‘Are you ever letting that go?’ Henry laughs.

I simply shrug. ‘I’m a vet, I just want the patients to be healthy.’ I try to look serious, but I can’t help but chuckle. ‘But I don’t think I can let it go, until Kal is sixty kilograms.’

‘But what if he is just a larger model?’ Henry tries, still not wanting to fully admit to the fact that he was overfeeding his pet and thus the main reason Kal is at least ten kilos too heavy.

‘He isn’t,’ I tell him. ‘He is large, sure, but I’ve seen American Akita’s who are a whole lot bigger than him, but still within the acceptable weight range.’

‘You’re one tough doctor, Olivia,’ he says with a smile. ‘You know, your daughter has quite the personality. Figured she’s just like you.’

I can’t help but laugh. ‘Yeah, people often say we’re basically twins.’

‘The fact that you told her about the Tooth Fairy being fake is admirable,’ he says.

‘I wanted her to spare the trauma I experienced,’ I say. ‘Besides, I don’t like lying to her, though everyone says it’s part of growing up.’

Henry nods and I can feel he wants to ask it. It’s always in people’s body language, when they want to know about the family situation. They clear their throat, avoid eye contact, rub their hands together and when they ask the question, they tilt their heads.

I decide that I’m not ready for a head tilt by the one and only Henry Cavill. ‘Her biological father didn’t want her,’ I say. ‘He broke up with me and disappeared out of my life, if that’s what you wanted to know.’

He sighs, a blush on his face, as if he is embarrassed that I caught on, before he even asked. ‘I don’t think I can ever understand those kind of men,’ he admits, staring at his dog and Vanessa. He leans forward, his elbows on his knees. ‘I mean, she’s a great kid, very in touch with her feelings and pretty smart too. Her biological father doesn’t know what he is missing out on.’

I don’t think I can ever understand those kind men. Did he honestly just say that? My entire body temporarily forgot how to function. Henry Cavill out there trying to steal my heart and with the rate he is going at, I’m willing to hand it over to him without putting up a fight. Her biological father doesn’t know what he is missing out on. That one went straight to my soul.

‘Well, he was an idiot anyways,’ I mumble. ‘Think I’m better off without him.’ I stare at Vanessa, who is chasing Kal, whose tail is wagging and he jumps around her like an idiot.

‘You are really better off without him,’ he says to me. ‘I don’t know the asshole, but I do know for a fact that you are better off without him. And Vanessa for that matter.’

I feel giddy, like a child before her birthday. ‘Listen, Henry, I’m sorry if she’s overstepping any boundaries. If you don’t want to pick her up, you don’t have to.’

‘I don’t mind, Olivia,’ he says. ‘She’s not overstepping any boundaries.’

I nod, not sure what to say. This isn’t helping with my fantasies, that I keep pushing back, postponing them to completely erupt when I’m in bed tonight. Belle is right: he oozes family man.

‘You’re doing a great job,’ he then says.

‘With what?’

‘Raising her.’

My cheeks flush. When was the last time I heard this, from someone other than Belle? I don’t think anyone has ever told me really… Except that one nurse in the hospital, when Vanessa was three and shoved a bead up her nose and I couldn’t stop crying. That event totally made me doubt my parental skills, until the nurse said that she dropped her infant on his head and he turned out to be fine.

‘I’m trying,’ I say, looking at my hands.

‘And that’s good enough,’ Henry whispers, but loud enough for me to hear it.

I need to contain the urge to just jump him, kissing his soft looking lips and allowing him to do things to me that I hadn’t done in such a long time.

Thankfully I have Vanessa, who always knows the exact moment I need her. ‘Mom, I had a little accident.’

When I look up, I see that she didn’t pee herself, but that she fell into the mud.

Face first.

Great.

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[grubbyduck]

No Man’s Land - an essay on feminism and forgiveness

I have always proudly named myself a feminist, since I was a little girl and heard my mum proudly announcing herself as a feminist to anyone who would listen.

But I believe the word 'feminist' takes on a false identity in our collective imagination - it is seen as hard, as baked, severe, steadfast, stubborn and rooted. From a male perspective, it possibly means abrasive, or too loud, or intimidatingly intolerant of men. From a female perspective, though, these traits become revered by young feminists; the power of knowing what you think and never rolling over! My experience of being a feminist throughout my life has been anything but - it has been a strange and nebulous aspect of my identity; it has sparked the familiar fires of bravery, ambition, rage, sadness and choking inarticulacy at times, sure, but at other times it has inspired apathy, reactionary attitudes, bravado and dismissivness. And at other, transitive times, it caused me to rethink my entire outlook on the world. And then again. And then again.

In primary school, I read and re-read Sandi Toksvig’s book GIRLS ARE BEST, which takes the reader through the forgotten women of history. I didn’t feel angry - I felt awed that there were female pirates, women on the front line in the world wars, women at the forefront of invention, science and literature. I still remember one line, where it is revealed that NASA’s excuse for only hiring six women astronauts compared to hundreds of men was that they didn’t stock suits small enough. 

When I was 13, I tried to start a girl's rugby team at my school. I got together 15 girls who also wanted to form a team. We asked the coaches if they would coach us - their responses varied from 'maybes' to straight up 'no's. The boys in our year laughed at us publicly. We would find an old ball, look up the rules online, and practise ourselves in free periods - but the boys would always come over, make fun of us and take over the game until we all felt too insecure to carry on. I shouted at a lot of boys during that time, and got a reputation among them as someone who was habitually angry and a bit of a buzzkill. Couldn't take a joke - that kind of thing.

When I was around 16, I got my first boyfriend. He was two years older (in his last year of sixth form) and seemed ever so clever to me. He laughed about angry feminists, and I laughed too. He knew I classified myself as a feminist, but, you know, a cool one - who doesn't get annoyed, and doesn't correct their boyfriends' bulging intellects. And in any case, whenever I did argue with him about anything political or philosophical, he would just chant books at me, list off articles he'd read, mention Kant and say 'they teach that wrong at GCSE level'. So I put more effort into researching my opinions (My opinions being things like - Trump is a terrible person who should not be elected as President - oh yeah, it was 2016), but every time I cited an article, he would tell me why that article was wrong or unreliable. I couldn't win. He was a Trump supporter (semi-ironically, but that made it even worse somehow) and he voted Leave in the Brexit referendum. He also wouldn't let me get an IUD even though I had terrible anxiety about getting pregnant, because of his parents' Catholicism. He sulked if he ever got aroused and then I didn’t feel like having sex, because apparently it ‘hurts’ men physically. One time I refused sex and he sulked the whole way through the night, refusing to sleep. I was incensed, and felt sure that my moral and political instincts were right, but I had been slowly worn down into doubting the validity of my own opinions, and into cushioning his ego at every turn - especially when he wasn't accepted into Oxford.

When I was 17/18, I broke up with him, and got on with my A Levels. One of them was English Literature. I remember having essay questions drilled into us, all of which were fairly standard and uninspired, but there was one that I habitually avoided:

'Discuss the presentation of women in this extract'

It irritated me beyond belief to hear the way that our class were parroting phrases like 'commodification and dehumanisation of women' in order to get a good grade. It felt so phony, so oversimplified, and frankly quite insulting. I couldn't bear reading classic books with the intent of finding every instance that the author compares a woman to an animal. It made me so sad! I couldn't understand how the others could happily write about such things and be pleased with their A*. As a keen contributor to lessons, my teacher would often call on me to comment in class - and to her surprise, I think, my responses about 'women's issues' were always sullen and could be characterised by a shrug. I wanted to talk about macro psychology, about Machievellian villains, about Shakespreare's subversion of comic convention in the English Renaissance. I absolutely did not want to talk about womb imagery, about men’s fixation and sexualisation of their mothers or about docile wives. In my application for Cambridge, I wrote about landscape and the psyche in pastoral literature, and got an offer to study English there. I applied to a mixed college - me and my friends agreed that we’d rather not go if we got put into an all female college. 

When I was 19, I got a job as an actor in a touring show in my year out before starting at Cambridge. I was the youngest by a few years. One company member - a tall, handsome and very talented man in his mid-twenties - had the exact same job title as me, only he was being paid £100 more than me PER WEEK. I was the only company member who didn’t have an agent, so I called the producers myself to complain. They told me they sympathised, that there just wasn’t enough money in the budget to pay me more - and in the end, I managed to negotiate myself an extra £75 per week by taking on the job of sewing up/fixing any broken costumes and puppets. So I had more work, and was still being paid 25% less. The man in question was a feminist, and complained to his agent (although he fell through on his promise to demand that he lose £50 a week and divide it evenly between us). He was a feminist - and yet he commented on how me and the other woman in the company dressed, and told us what to wear. He was a feminist, only he slept with both of us on tour, and lied to us both about it. He was a feminist, only he pitted me against and isolated me from the only other woman in the company, the only person who may have been a mentor or a confidante. He was a feminist, only he put me down daily about my skills as a performer and made me doubt my intelligence, my talent and my worth. 

When I was 20, I started at Cambridge University, studying English Literature. Over the summer, I read Lundy Bancroft’s book ‘Why Does He Do That’ which is a study of abusers and ‘angry and controlling men’. It made me realise that I had not been given the tools to recognise coercive and controlling behaviour - I finally stopped blaming myself for attracting controlling men into my life. I also read ‘Equal’ by Carrie Gracie, about her fight to secure equal pay for equal work at the BBC in 2017-2019. It was reading that book that I fully appreciated that I had already experienced illegal pay discrimination in the workplace. Both made me cry in places, and it felt as though something had thawed in me. I realised that I was not the exception. That ‘women’s issues’ do apply to me. In my first term at Cambridge, I wrote some unorthodox essays. I wrote one on Virginia Woolf named ‘The Dogs Are Dancing’ which began with a page long ‘disclaimer for my womanly emotions’ that attempted to explain to my male supervisor how difficult it is for women to write dispassionately and objectively, as they start to see themselves as unfairly separate, excluded and outlined from the male literary consciousness. He didn’t really understand it, though he enjoyed the passion behind my prose. 

The ‘woman questions’ at undergraduate level suddenly didn’t seem as easy, as boring or as depressing as those I had encountered at A Level. I had to reconcile with the fact that I had only been exposed to a whitewashed version of feminism throughout my life. At University, I learned the word Intersectionality - and it made immediate and ferocious sense to me. I wrote an essay on Aphra Behn’s novella ‘Oroonoko’, which is about a Black prince and his pursuit of Imoinda, a Black princess. I had to get to grips with how a feminist author from the Renaissance period tackled issues of race. I had to examine how she dehumanised and sexualised Imionda in the same way that white women were used to being treated by men. I had to really question to what extent Aphra Behn was on Imionda’s side - examine the violent punishment of Oroonoko for mistreating her. I found myself really wanting to believe that Behn had done this purposefully as social commentary. I mentioned in my essay that I was aware of my own white female critical ingenuity. For the first time, I was writing about something I didn’t have any personal authority over in my life - I had to educate myself meticulously in order to speak boldly about race.

As I found myself surrounded by more women who were actively and unashamedly feminist, I realised just how many opinions exist within that bracket. I realised that I didn’t agree with a lot of other feminists about aspects of the movement. I started to only turn up to lectures by women. I started to only read literary criticism written by women - not even consciously; I just realised that I trusted their voices more intrinsically. I started to wish I had applied to an all female college. I realised that all female spaces weren’t uncool - that is an image that I had learned from men, and from trying to impress men. The idea that Black people, trans people, that non binary people could be excluded from feminism seemed completely absurd to me. I ended up in a mindset that was constructed to instinctively mistrust men. Not hate - just mistrust. I started to get fatigued by explaining basic feminist principles to sceptical men.

I watched the TV show Mrs America. It made my heart speed up with longing, with awe, with nerves, sorrow, anger - again, it showed me how diverse the word Feminism is. The longing I felt was for a time where feminist issues seemed by comparison clear-cut, and unifying. A time where it was good to be angry, where anger got stuff done. I am definitely angry. The problem is, the times that feminism has benefitted me and others the most in my life is when I use it forgivingly and patiently. When I sit in my anger, meditate on it, control it, and talk to those I don’t agree with on subjects relating to feminism with the active intent to understand their point of view. Listening to opinions that seemed so clearly wrong to me was the most difficult thing in the world - but it changed my life, and once again, it changed my definition of feminism. 

Feminism is listening to Black women berating white feminists, and rather than feeling defensive or exempt, asking questions about how I have contributed to a movement that excludes women of colour. Feminism is listening to my mother’s anxieties about trans women being included in all-female spaces, and asking her where those anxieties stem from. Feminism is understanding that listening to others who disagree with you doesn’t endanger your principles - you can walk away from that conversation and know what you know. Feminism is checking yourself when you undermine or universalise male emotion surrounding the subject. Feminism is allowing your mind to change, to evolve, to include those that you once didn’t consider - it is celebrating quotas, remembering important women, giving thanks for the fact that feminism is so complex, so diverse, so fraught and fought over. 

Feminism is common ground. It is no man’s land. It is the space between a Christian housewife and a liberated single trans woman. It is understanding women of other races, other cultures, other religions. It is disabled women, it is autistic women, it is trans men who have biologically female medical needs that are being ignored. It is forgiveness for our selfishness. It feels impossible.

The road to feminism is the road to enlightenment. It is the road to Intersectional equity. It is hard. It is a journey. No one does it perfectly. It is like the female orgasm - culturally ignored, not seen as necessary, a mystery even to a lot of women, many-layered, multitudinous, taboo, comes in waves. It is pleasure, and it is disappointment. 

All I know is that the hard-faced, warrior version of feminism that was my understanding only a few years ago reduced my allies and comrades in arms to a small group of people who were almost exaclty like me and so agreed with me on almost everything. Flexible, forgiving and inquisitive feminism has resulted in me loving all women, and fighting for all women consciously. And by fighting for all women, I also must fight for Black civil rights, for disabled rights, for Trans rights, for immigrant rights, for homeless rights, for gay rights, and for all human rights because women intersect every one of these minorities. My scoffing, know-it-all self doing my A Levels could never have felt this kind of love. My ironic jokes about feminists with my first boyfriend could never have made any woman feel loved. My frustration that my SPECIFIC experience of misogyny as a white, middle-class bisexual woman didn’t feel related to the other million female experiences could never have facilitated unity, common ground, or learning to understand women that existed completely out of my experience as a woman.

My feminism has lead me to becoming friends with some of those boys who mocked me for wanting to play rugby, and with the woman that was vying with me over that man in the acting company for 8 months. It is slowly melting my resentment towards all men - it is even allowing me to feel sorry for the men who have mistreated me in the past. 

I guess I want to express in this mammoth essay post that so far my feminist journey has lead me to the realisation that if your feminism isn’t growing you, you aren’t doing it right. Perhaps it will morph again in the future. But for now, Feminism is a love of humanity, rather than a hatred of it. That is all. 

[electronicdelusionstarlight]

(Look, I think I’m allowed at least one (1) Skyrim problematic fave and that’s going to be this Feral Cat Lady).

And I’m going to start right off with a small fic blurb, right under the cut:

“Are we there yet?” Lucien, her new travel companion, whines for what feels is the 100th time.

She’s met (and attempted to flirt with, much to his flustered bewilderment) the young man barely a couple hours, in the aptly named Dead’s Man Drink, and while he has certainly been proven himself invaluable as the human shield she so desperately needed, deep in the hostile and dangerous lands of Skyrim, but he sure could get... testy at times, almost annoying, especially under this light, early morning drizzle.

Still, he wasn’t the most annoying thing that ever happened to her, and he promised her compensation for her troubles, the man actually believing her to be some seasoned adventurer rather than a out of her luck spellslinger, born under the wrong great house, and a recently escaped convict...

She, is Armidia Arvel. She’s a Dunmer from Cyrodil, and not even half a day ago, she was trying to cross the border onto Skyrim.

Her grandma, bless her soul, was a minor member of House Hlaalu, not important enough to warrant any real mention really, but also a Prominent member of the Twin Lamps. She helped run away slaves cross the border with her boat, in the dead of night, and used to boast all the time about that one time she had met the Nerevarine herself, before she had left the island for the mysterious Akavir...

She had managed to miss the death of their great house by a slim margin, out with granny and dad in the Imperial Province when the gates opened, forced to settle there, in Bravil, after... all the mess that had come to their motherland, the red year, the invasion, the crisis, the purge...

Still, here she was now, born from a family of merchants and politicians, under the sign of the mage. They had tried to have her get a trade, maybe become a jeweler, forging rings and necklaces to sell to the highest bidder, settle down, but she’s always been restless, Armidia, wanting to explore new places, find new knoweldges, meet new people...

No matter how wrong they might be for her.

She sighs, tolerating her new... friend, she assume, dad always said someone should always treat everyone as their friend as long as they don’t lose that right via their actions, she can almost hear him parrot it again...

In fact, she is hearing him parroting it right now, that bastard hasn’t shut up ever since he died during that blasted great war, serving in the 8th legion, as do all of her blasted, bloody ancestors, day and night every day since she turned 8 droning on and on and whispering and SCREAMING and deafening her with their pleas and suggestions and orders and judgement for her choice of profession, a lowly mage, not even allowed into the Fetchers’ university, like some Telvanni rubble, her choices in life, her voyage onto the land of their ancestral enemies, judging, screaming, whispering, overloading her with their chatter their memories their hopes dreams fears hate love-.

Dunmers are supposed to revere and venerate their ancestors. She, on the other hand, can’t help but curse them, the bastards.

She mumbles, hand to her head as she can feel yet another headache coming. Lucien doesn’t seem to notice, but her new dog is. The small pupper, Styx, a being out right from a conjurer’s worst nightmare, budges against her leg with a soft whine, worryingly looking up her master with the bright, pleading stars she has for eyes. She attempts a smile, the soft, shadowy doggo momentarily drowning Her Ancestors’ whining with her mere presence, soothing her a little.

She had met the eldritch beast near the Lover’s Stone, her master’s corpse nearby, surprisingly docile as she approached her, as if she was waiting for her all along, soothing her with her very presence, dampening her Ancestor’s voices to a managable level... She had to keep her with her, no matter how big she migtht one day grow.

She had been en route from the ruins of Helgen, the place destroyed after a creature out of legends struck it down right as she was passing through it, in the middle of some sort of execution of some dissidents or something.

(she didn’t really care about it, politics and criminals had never been her forte really, much to her grandmas and her dad and all those other fetcher’s horror.

Mom understood tho. She used to anyway, before she died with her father and the 8th legion, leaving her with her heartbroken, demanding, yet loving Grandmas, still alive down south in their home in Bravil...

The only one of her blasted ancestors she wanted to hear, her mom, at least one last time, and she refused to talk, as if she wasn’t there to speak to her in the first place...)

She was just passing through, minding her own business, when a blasted DRAGON attacks the place, scanning the crowd of onlookers, watching the execution, for something or someone...

She was probably one of the few that survived the whole mess, if with a few burns and scraps. Not that she’s complaining really, she managed to meet some hot guy in uniform after all, even ended up meeting his family, she thinks his name was Hadvar, a bit naive, but definitely a catch, helped him fight a bear too, before leaving for her trip to Falkreath’s shrine of Arkay...

(Her hope was the local priests knew of something to keep the blasted ancestors at bay. No such luck unfortunately, and she ended up getting even tasked with fetching the head priest’s journal for him and witnessing a funeral, the whispers loud and bloody clear all the time)...

She shakes her head, Her grip on reality  finally in check thanks to the cute yet slightly terrifying puppy, the whispers momentarily subsided, she looks up, their next destination now in sight.

It’s a dilapidated Nord Tower. The inn keeper at Falkreath had indicated it as a possible place of interest, and she had been planning to go there, snoop in in case it contained some loot or some spell tomes to upgrade her frankly subpar collection of spells, before leaving the hold and taking off toward the next destination in her trip, Riften, where a family friend was supposed to live, a member of house Dreth if she remembers correctly...

Lucien comments on the architecture of the place and she ignores him, the whispers blessedly murmured, as she circumspectly enters the tower. Grass and vegetation as overrun the place, claiming it for its own, and the structure has collapsed ages ago. A chest is standing against a far wall, a severely decayed skeleton corpse resting at its bottom, his armor miraculously intact. Her ancestors whispers grow louder for a second, muttering something about “The Sly” meeting his end, before her eyes lie on the huge, heavy shield, a complicated design engraved onto it.

That thing will fetch her a pretty fortune, she thinks, despite everything still a Hlaalu in blood and flesh, and for once she can feel her Ancestor’s approval at her greed, her desire to gain... Money...

Lucien is in tow, his eyes widening at the shield, as if he’s recognizing it from one of his dusty books, but she doesn’t care, she puts a step forward, eager to get her hands on her prize... only to trip on an upturned root, going face down on the grassy ground with a hump.

Styx yips worriedly behind her, waiting outside the door, and Lucien bumbles his way toward her fallen form to help her back on her feet... Only for the slow, deliberate sound of a blade being drawn to cut the whispers, like a knife through butter.

“Well well well, what do we have here?” A voice says, with a accent similar to the ones the Khajiit in Bravil used to have, and she looks up from her heap on the ground, Lucien frozen in his tracks behind her as he stares in horror, at the armored Khajiit woman now standing between her and the chest, the shield, her sword, so particular in design,help aloof atop her shoulder...

She lowers it toward her chin, slowly tipping the blade against it, not hard enough to draw blood, but forcefully enough to get her head tilted upwards

“Two lost little fools, eager to fall to their doom? Did the Thalmor send you to rat me out, or did you simply wish to... lose your life by my blade?” She humphs, a strange look in her eyes as she tilts away her blade from her prey, leaving her wide eyed on the ground, staring up at her, “Well, I’m not interested. I’m not going to butcher either of you, you are not worthy of my steel, too green, too... weak, killing you would make me no batter than those puffed up fools, wishing to kill the great white stag for some foolish concept of... glory, pfah”

Armidia stares up at her, her voice lost, the whispers, the judgement, they are still there, but is getting drowned out by something within her, something strong, floating into a mindset and a void within her she had never felt before, as she looks up at the dangerous, definitely murderous khajiit, giving her a cocky, self reassured grin, as if she was the strongest swordwoman in the entire world and she knew it too.

Armidia gulps, her throat suddenly dry, as her life is spared with the cock of the Khajiit’s brow, one thought finally crashing and burning into her mind, stronger than Red Mountain’s fire, louder than the screams of her ancestors, giving her one, terrible, absolute command, to fulfill, or die trying...

“I must get rawed by this cat be it the last thing I do.”

[sandyfeetshshop]

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ABOUT 72 ARE CONCERNED WITH VIOLENCE IN MAJOR CITIES 62 STATE AFFECT THEIR VOTE SO I THINK THIS GOES ALONG WITH WHAT TRUMP IS NOW PRESENTING AS THE SILENT MAJORITY THAT I THINK THAT 62 REALLY REPRESENTS THAT SILENT MAJORITY NOW THAT’S BEGINNING TO MOVE AND SHIFT AND THEN TAKE MOVE FORWARD AND TRY TO PUT DOWN SOME OF THESE CRAZY THINGS THAT ARE GOING ON NEXT AS THIS IS REPARATIONS THE BLM CHICAGO DEFENDS LOOTING HOLDS RALLY FOR PROTEST FOR HOLDS RALLY FOR PROTESTERS ARRESTED IN SUNDAY’S RIOTS SO WHAT YOU’RE SEEING NOW IS THE POLICE DEPARTMENTS THEY ARE LETTING GO OF ANY PROTESTERS THAT ARE ARRESTED BY THE POLICE THE DAS IN AND ANYBODY CONNECTED INTERNALLY THEY’RE LETTING GO OF ALL THESE PEOPLE LIKE MAD PRESENT SO IT’S VERY DEFEATING. 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[creativesage]

(via A step-by-step guide on how to choose, make, and keep New Year’s resolutions – Harvard Gazette)

Moving forward, even slowly, puts your goals within reach.

A 12-step guide to keeping those resolutions

As the holiday music fades and the time to pay the resolutions piper comes due, let Harvard experts make the transition a little easier. Don’t know where to start? You can try the 1 percent performance improvement method. Stressed at the prospect of a lifestyle change? Practice mindfulness and find out how meditation can lead to a “better brain” in just eight weeks. Want to extend that? Learn what 80 years of Harvard research has to say about living a longer and happier life.

Still not sure what will suit you best? Pick a topic from the Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health’s Nutrition Source, where you’ll find advice that goes far beyond your plate and that first cup of coffee in the morning.

The key is to choose your New Year’s resolution, and make it happen. MacKenzie Kassab, a former contributor to the Division of Continuing Education’s Professional Development website, put together a 12-month plan for making — and keeping — resolutions filled with the advice of experts from Harvard and beyond.

Let’s take a look.

January: Ready, set, goal

This is it: the time to think ahead about where — and who — you want to be this year.

“I don’t think there’s such a thing as a goal too big,” says Margaret Andrews, president of Mind and Hand Associates consulting firm and an instructor for the Harvard Division of Continuing Education.

So reach for the stars! But remember, even astronauts have to contend with bad weather. “You have to think about your ecosystem,” Andrews says. What external factors could prevent you from reaching your goal?

You might resolve to eat healthy foods and lose five pounds around your midsection. That’s reasonable enough. But how will you cope with those 3 o’clock sugar cravings? What will you do when your oblivious spouse stocks the cabinet with cookies and chips? Is there something beyond your control that could be a barrier to success? Keep it in mind, but don’t get discouraged.

“Consider what you need to start doing or stop doing, and anticipate obstacles,” Andrews says. “If you don’t think about it now, then you’ll have no willpower in that moment.” Have a strategy in place, and you’ll be on your way to reaching that goal in no time.

February: Commit to a process

You’ve set your sights on a goal. Now, devise a plan.

Entrepreneur and author of “Atomic Habits” James Clear recently told Inc. magazine that simply setting a goal is the first step on the road to unhappiness.

“You’re essentially saying, ‘I’m not good enough yet, but I will be when I reach my goal.’ The problem with this mindset is that you’re teaching yourself to always put off happiness and success until the next milestone is achieved,” Clear says.

Instead, he suggests focusing on a process, not the end result. Deconstruct your goal into productive, workable actions.

Finding a new job is a common resolution. But the hunt can be daunting. To make it more manageable, establish a schedule: send out two résumés a week, or attend one networking event a month.

By celebrating small victories, the journey becomes as meaningful as the destination.

March: Find your motivation

“There’s no one-size-fits-all solution when it comes to motivation,” Andrews says. “Some people go whole hog, and others ease themselves in. You really have to know yourself and what works for you.”

This is the time to explore what lights your fire. If your goal is to run a marathon, you might find the most encouragement in rewarding small wins. Reach 10 miles, book yourself a massage.

If that doesn’t work for you, see if a picture of Usain Bolt on the refrigerator is enough to keep you moving. Explore tactics until you find one that fits, and don’t be afraid to get creative.

April: Shout your intentions

If your ambition is waning, proclaim your intentions from the rooftops. Text friends, email close colleagues, or call your mom.

“When we advertise our desire to change, we are openly risking failure, putting our reputation and self-respect on the line,” says Marshall Goldsmith, executive coach and author of “Triggers.” “It’s the difference between betting on ourselves with hard-earned cash and settling for a friendly no-money wager.”

Encouragement is a positive byproduct — most people will want to see you succeed, and some may even offer support or guidance.

A Harvard study, almost 80 years old, has proved that embracing community helps us live longer, and be happier.

May: Question everything you’re doing

One of Goldsmith’s “magic moves” for changing behavior is daily self-questioning. He suggests composing a list of queries that encourage reflection.

Someone aiming to gain three new clients this year might ask, “Did I do my best to generate leads today?” Meanwhile, someone who wants a heftier savings account could inquire, “Did I do my best to avoid unnecessary spending today?”

There are no rules, other than tracking progress with the same questions each day, and just one suggestion: starting each question with “Did I do my best to …”

“This phrase injects personal ownership and responsibility into the Q&A process,” he says.

June: Reassess your goals

You’re halfway through the year, and your goal is in sight! Or perhaps not. If things aren’t going as planned, reconsider your strategy and be honest about what your resolution is worth to you.

“Someone I know was trying to lose weight, and she was told she’d need to cut out her nightly glass of wine,” Andrews says. “She knew herself well enough to say, ‘That’s a pleasant part of my life, and I’m not willing to give it up.’ She found other ways to compensate.” Look at which tactics have been less effective to this point, and explore other ways of reaching your goal. Maybe you add 15 minutes to your workout but keep the pinot noir.

Tweaking your expectations might also be acceptable. “You may want to be the weight you were at 18, but are you really willing to do everything required to get there?” asks Andrews. Fitting into a snug pair of jeans from last year might be a reasonable compromise, especially once you’ve seen what success demands.

July: Find support

There’s a reason support groups exist for everything from addiction to breastfeeding: There’s power in numbers. Social support can be instrumental to accomplishing goals.

“Hang with the right crowd and their success can inspire us to think, ‘If they can do it, I can too!’” says Piers Steel, the researcher behind “The Procrastination Equation.”

Find an organization whose mission aligns with yours, whether it’s Weight Watchers, Habitat for Humanity, or the Society of Women Engineers. A gap in the market is a great excuse to create your own goal-oriented group, which might be just a handful of colleagues sharing professional growth strategies over dinner. “Giving up or continuing to strive — both are contagious,” Steel says.

August: Get energized

All goals, personal or professional, require adequate energy. Unfortunately, things like stress, caffeine, alcohol, and late nights can sap stamina. Willpower and motivation are often the next to go.

A lifestyle overhaul is extreme, but minor changes add up. First, purge your living or workspace of distractions, whether that means clearing clutter from your desk or uninstalling the Facebook app from your phone. Steel advises “strategically allocating” limited energy reserves. Less mess, literal or figurative, equals more mental focus.

Next, determine when you’re most efficient, and dedicate part of that time to meeting your goal. Are you a morning person striving to become fluent in French? Put on Radio France Internationale while getting ready for work. Is your head clearest in the afternoon? Pull out les leçons on your lunch break.

And don’t neglect your mental and physical health. “Your energy stores are a limited resource, so actively replenish them,” Steel says. That means nurturing your well-being — and getting a good night’s sleep.

September: See results

Close your eyes. Now, imagine meeting your goal. Are you holding a gold medal? A bigger paycheck? A jaw-dropping baked Alaska? According to Steel, “The detailed mental re-creation of a performance engages mirror neurons that engrave the act in your brain almost as deeply as if you were actually practicing it.”

The next — and most important — step is called mental contrasting: visualizing where you are today, with an empty trophy case, bank account, or oven. “The result will be that your present situation becomes framed as an obstacle standing in the way of your dreams,” says Steel.

Contrasting where you are and where you want to be sparks exactly the motivation most people need to spring into action.

October: Get inspired

Bill Gates reads a reported 50 books a year. In fact, the Microsoft co-founder is so passionate about reading that he started the GatesNotes blog to post reviews of his favorite titles. “Shoe Dog,” by Nike’s Phil Knight, is at the top of the list. “Knight opens up in a way few CEOs are willing to do,” writes Gates. “He tells his story as honestly as he can. It’s an amazing tale.” And an inspiring one, even for one of the world’s most powerful men.

Books and movies can provide the encouragement we can’t always get from people around us. “Rocky” gives hope to the underdog. “The Pursuit of Happyness” suggests that anything’s possible. Search for plots that strike a chord. “The most effective [biographies] will resonate with your own background,” Steel says.

Not everyone can plow through a book a week, but motivational speeches and podcasts stream from all corners of the internet. “Great athletes, heroes, and entrepreneurs regularly speak about their experiences,” says Steel. “Seek them out.”

Get inspired on your morning commute, and you’ll be surprised what you can accomplish throughout the day.

November: Ask for help

Another of Goldsmith’s magic moves is asking for help. “Few people will refuse your sincere plea,” he says. “Asking for help sustains the change process, keeps it moving forward.”

When you hit a stumbling block, call on friends who’ve accomplished similar goals or on your professional mentor. Most people will be honored you came to them for support.

And when you’re ready to wave the white flag, call in the experts. There are resources to support just about every ambition, from amateur cooking classes to professional development programs. Even Beyoncé worked with a vocal coach to reach her goal of world domination.

December: Applaud success — or lessons learned

The end of the year is a time to reflect on progress toward your goal or to pat yourself on the back for achieving it.

Is there any shame in not fulfilling a resolution? “It depends on the goal,” says Andrews. “If it’s to stop doing something abusive to yourself or someone else, it’s probably not a good one to give up on. Or it might turn out your goal wasn’t really what you were going after. You know what? It’s your life, and you get to decide that. Failure isn’t failure if you learn something from it. It’s just a way station on the way to success.”

Contemplate this year’s obstacles and processes, and rework your strategy for next year. There’s rarely a deadline for prosperity.

Ready to start?

Develop your personal plan for meeting your resolutions with a 12-month worksheet you can download here.

[Entire post — click on the title link to read it at the Harvard Gazette.]

***

You’re working on your goals, and your team’s goals. We can help you spring into action and develop a real plan that you can implement in a smart way, so you’ll start seeing results immediately, before you feel discouraged. If you feel that you’ve already gone off-track, we can help you get your focus, courage, and motivation back.

At  Creative Sage™, we often coach and mentor individual clients, as well as work teams, in the areas of change management, building resilience, making personal, career or organizational transitions — including to retirement, or an “encore career” — and facilitating development of leadership, creativity and collaboration capabilities. We also work with clients on work/life balance, finding purpose and meaning, focus and productivity issues, and how to present themselves and their ideas more effectively in professional situations.

We guide and mentor executives, entrepreneurs, intrapreneurs, artists, and creative professionals of all generations, to help them more effectively implement transition processes, and to become more resilient in adjusting to rapid changes in the workplace — including learning effective coping techniques for handling failure, as well as success. We work with on-site and virtual teams.

Please do not hesitate to contact us if you would like to discuss your situation. You can also call us at 1-510-845-5510 in San Francisco / Silicon Valley. Let’s talk! An initial exploratory phone conversation is free. When you talk with me, I promise that I’ll always LISTEN to you with open ears, mind and heart, to help you clarify your own unique path to a higher vista of success.

              ~Cathryn Hrudicka, Founder, CEO and Chief Imagination Officer of Creative Sage™, Executive Coach, Consultant, and Mentor.

***

[sebastianinalaska]

I have really been slacking

I’ve tried writing this same post about 3 separate times. There was going to be a lot more in these but I never had time to finish and now I’ve forgotten a lot of the details. Now I’m just gonna move on and go over the highlights of what was supposed to be a lengthy post. So I think I’ve made some progress and hopefully will be able to get some perks from management. The management team went out for drinks and pizza and I was the only regular worker who was invited to go with them. So I instantly thought, okay I’ve made it in, friends with the managers and supervisors, about to get some perks, favorable hours, preferred day off, yeahhhh this is going to be nice. We’ll see if that pans out. Afterwards we all went to this cemetery to hang out in my managers 4 wheeler, leisurely stroll going 20 miles an hour taking in the views and relaxing to the max. ya know normal management team stuff. We were getting destroyed by mosquitos so we couldn’t hang too long and went home. I was feeling great because I had just made some new connections and decided to go back to my favorite river to reflect. One thing I didn’t notice last time while walking with Cassidy to the river was there are a lot of no trespassing signs on the way, which sketched me out. I mean I’m a black guy, alone, wearing a hoodie in Alaska. Don’t know if you know this but there aren’t very many of us out here, so I wasn’t feeling too comfortable, guys who look like me have been killed for less. I got to the river and then I could hear dogs, or wolves..whatever they were, they were barking angrily and they didn’t sound too far away. Needless to say I didn’t hang out there too long, I turned around and decided I’d go back home. On the way home a state trooper was passing by, I was already feeling sketchy about the whole situation, and wasn’t sure if I was actually trespassing or not…so I instantly thought oh shit someone called the cops, I’m a black guy, in a hoodie, on private property. This isn’t going to end well. I pulled out my phone, and started recording ya know..just in case. The Marshall offered me a ride and I took it..that was awkward. At one point he invited me to go to church and told me to write down his number, so when I pulled out my phone he saw I was recording him so that was even more awkward, I hopped out of his car and walked away very briskly and went to bed for the night. This is why I wish I wrote about this earlier because I can’t remember the order of events that followed that. I have more I want to write about but want to make sure it makes sense. So I think I’ll just start telling a bunch of smaller stories to make sure I remember them and make it easier to post more frequently. I started work finally and it was a little stressful but I got the job done ! ✅I showed up to work 5 hours early because I misread the schedule and I arrived 30 minutes before I thought I was supposed to show up and my manager told me to go ahead and clock in. When my supervisors got in they asked why did I come in so early, I thought they were talking about the 30 minutes because at that point I was still unaware that I showed up four hours early. They then let me know that I should not have been there but I was saved by the fact that my manager told me to go ahead and clock in. She informed them that she told me to do that and I was clear. And I ended up getting a “star of the moment” which is like a little reward program we have because I was so dedicated to the job and came in early. So my screw up lead to me being rewarded lol. Classic Sebastian. I also got a note from a customer about my excellent customer service which makes you feel good. The last thing I want to talk about is the train ride to our sister hotel. One thing you’ll learn about me is that I’m a little paranoid and have some trust issues. I don’t know why it’s just always been how I’ve been. I always question people’s good intentions. So I was on the train just taking in the views and I was just thinking about everyone who was being so nice to me and great everything was going and I couldn’t believe it. I started thinking okay what is it, what’s the catch, do these people really like me? I can’t even explain the screwed up thoughts that I was having for absolutely no reason. So I was on the train looking out the window and these views were indescribable, I hate that I can’t put it into words but they were breathtaking. And me being me, I started crying. Just thinking about how I’m in Alaska and things are looking up and comparing my mindset now to my mindset a year ago, and two years ago, and three years ago, and all the things that once had me depressed was all gone and that was the first moment I really realized that. I just soaked it in and hid my face from everyone because I didn’t want them to see me crying. I feel like I don’t even deserve to be experiencing what I was. That ride is one I’ll never forget. After dinner my friend found me and we went to the caboose and just soaked in more views outside, took pictures and had a great time. We made a stop in the city of Talkeetna which has a cat for a mayor(no joke). Very quaint little town with a population of only 896. Very quiet, very still. There was a little coffee shop that we went into and found some other friends there. We got to talking about what lead us to Alaska and exchanged stories. One Of the guys mentioned how his older brother and sister are very successful and he feels like a “fuck up” because all he’s doing now is driving a bus for a hotel. I then told him “success is all relative man, sure your brother and sister are successful and their corporate job and have lots of nice things and money but dude you’re out seeing the world! You’re in Alaska and who knows where you’re going next”. He received that well and he and our other three friends decided to tour the city… or town together. There was a gift shop and one thing popped out at me, this simple little meditation rock with the word “peace” on it. I bought it and I told the lady at the register that I would probably lose it before I ever made it back home. It was my turn to receive some insights and then she told me about “the journey”. She said everything happens for a reason and if I happen to lose it, then it was a part of the journey and there will be other things that will happen on these journeys. My journey and the rocks. I wish I wrote this earlier and did her quote justice because it was really insightful and just fitting to my current mood and situation and it made me think about my journey. And all the people I’ve met and things that I have done that lead to me that very moment with my new friends, and my rock that said peace. And I felt it! We all decided to become good friends, joined a little group chat and hopefully I’ll be able to hang with them a lot in the future. Got some more stories coming your way soon!

[pinguinalakadabra]

how to stop being broke

How to Stop Being Broke.

If you're sick of being broke, it's time to take control of your finances! Whether you need to work on your spending habits, learn how to save, or find ways to earn more money, you can find a way to stop being broke. Follow these steps to start working towards financial freedom and better peace of mind.

Part 1 Getting into the Right Mindset. 1. Set goals. If you want to change your financial situation, you need to get specific about want you want to accomplish. Think about exactly what you want your finances to look like and what you can do to achieve those goals. Setting short-term goals in addition to long-term goals can help keep you motivated by providing you with a sense of accomplishment. Create a budget for non-essential items and hold yourself accountable for it each month. If you go over-budget one month, tell yourself that your budget for the next month is reduced as a result. 2. Stop comparing yourself to others. If you're spending beyond your means because you feel that you need to keep up with your friends or show others that you can afford a certain lifestyle, you're not doing yourself any favors. Stop worrying about what others can afford and think about how you can live within your means. Stop equating your self-worth with your ability to buy things. This kind of thinking will make you extremely unhappy in the long run and will probably get you stuck in debt forever. 3. Track your expenses. To understand exactly where all your money is going, keep careful track of every dollar you spend. You can do this with a pen and paper or electronically if you use a card for everything, but make sure to account for everything. This simple habit will help you spend more wisely. Try categorizing your expenses and adding them up on a monthly basis. For example, you could create categories for food, housing, transportation, utilities, insurance, entertainment, and clothing. Then calculate what percentage of your income you are spending on each category. You might realize that your expenses in some of these categories are way too high. To understand how much you can afford to spend each day, subtract your fixed expenses from your monthly income and divide the remaining amount by 31. 4. Make a plan for getting out of debt. If you are broke because you have credit card debt, a car payment, or student loans, think about what you can do to pay off these debts faster. Making even a few extra payments each year can help you pay off your debts much faster. 5. Start saving. This may seem impossible if you are always broke, but planning for the future will help you get out of this cycle. Start small by just putting $50 in an emergency fund each month. Don't forget to save for retirement! Take advantage of the 401k offerings at your company or open an IRA account.

Part 2 Avoiding Money Traps. 1. Avoid lending to others. While you may want to help out your loved ones who are in need, you really shouldn't be lending money if you can't afford to pay your own bills. 2. Avoid payday loans. While they may seem like a good solution if you're strapped for cash, the interest rates are ridiculously high, so they will only get you further into debt. 3. Understand how much it will really cost. Before you take out any kind of loan or finance any purchase, be sure to calculate what your monthly payments will be, how long it will take you to repay the debt, and how much you will be paying in interest. In some cases, paying interest may be worth it. For example, most people cannot afford to purchase a house without taking out a mortgage, but depending on the price of the house and the average cost of rent in your area, you might still be saving a significant amount of money by choosing to buy with a mortgage instead of renting. Be especially wary of high interest rates for depreciating assets like vehicles. If you decide to sell your vehicle after you have owned it for several years, it may be worth less than what you owe on it. This can also happen with real estate when the market conditions are poor. 4. Avoid impulse buys. If you always have a plan for what you will buy, you will have a much easier time managing your finances. If you have a hard time controlling your purchases when you go to the mall, try to avoid going to the mall at all. Write out a list when you go shopping so you will always know exactly what you need to buy. 5. Use credit cards wisely. If you have a harder time keeping track of your expenses and sticking to your budget when you use a credit card, stop using it. Paying with cash instead of a credit card will allow you to visualize how much of your available funds you are spending on a given purchase. If you are able to stick to your budget when using a credit card, look for one that has no annual fee and will reward you with cash back or other incentives. Just make sure you always pay your bill on time or these incentives will not be worth the price you are paying in interest.

Part 3 Spending Less. 1. Assess your daily or weekly spending habits. Once you have a solid grasp on what you are spending your money on, you can start cutting out expensive habits. 2. Buy used items. You can save on everything from your next car to furnishings for your home by buying gently used items. You can sometimes find really great clothes that have barely been worn at thrift shops for a fraction of the price. 3. Look for monthly expenses that can be cut. If you pay for monthly memberships or subscriptions, carefully assess how much they cost, how much you use them, and whether you could give them up. Make sure you're not paying for services that you never use. For example, if you have premium cable channels that you never watch, you can cancel them without feeling like you are making any sacrifices. The same goes for your cell phone bill if you are paying for more data than you ever use. 4. Compare items or brands when shopping. If you're on a tight budget, you want to make sure you're always getting the best deal on absolutely everything. Take some time to compare prices for items you purchase regularly and for large purchases. If you've had the same auto insurance carrier or cable company for a long time, there might be better deals out there, so be sure to comparison shop regularly. Shopping for necessities online can be cheaper in some instances, but make sure you take shipping charges into account. Use coupons to save some extra cash. Keep in mind that many retailers accept competitors' coupons. 5. Ask for a better deal. You can always ask your service providers for better deals, especially if you've been a loyal customer. The worst they can say is no. Try this with your cable and internet providers, insurance companies, and cell phone carriers. 6. Spend less on entertainment or at restaurants. Whether it's dining out or going to amusement parks, entertainment can eat up a big chunk of your budget. Look for less expensive ways to have fun. Learn to cook at home and keep the fridge well stocked with ingredients for things that you know you can cook from scratch when you come home late and don't have much time to whip up a grand meal. Instead of going out to eat with friends, invite them over for a potluck. 7. Do more yourself. It may be convenient to use a laundry service or to have someone else shovel your driveway, but if you're physically capable of doing these things yourself. Think about the money you can save. If you're not very handy, try to teach yourself to do more around the house. If you need a simple repair done, you may be able to watch a video online or take a class at a local home improvement store to learn how to do it yourself. 8. Save money on energy. Go green around the house to save money on your utility bills each month. Sealing up air gaps can reduce your heating and cooling bills. If you own your home, investing in a properly insulated attic can make a huge difference. Turning your heat down just a few degrees in the winter can make a big difference in your energy bills as well. A programmable thermostat will let you automate the temperature of your house so you won't spend money on heating the place to a comfortable level when you're not at home. 9. Avoid bank and credit card fees. Choose your bank and credit card providers wisely in order to avoid unnecessary fees. Make sure to only use the ATM at your bank if you will get charged for using outside ATMs. 10. Aim to have a few no-spend days a month. After a while, it becomes a game: "How can I run my life today without writing anything down in my little blue book?" "How ingenious can I be to make do with the things, food, and resources I already have at my disposal?" See how often you can turn this into a habit.

Part 4 Earning More. 1. Get a better job. If spending less is just not enough, it may be time to get a better job that will allow you to make more money. Start by updating your resume, searching for listings online, and networking with other professionals in your field. Don't forget to look for advancement opportunities within your company. 2. Do something else on the side. Using your skills to provide freelance or consulting services is a great way to earn additional income. If this won't work with your profession, get a part-time job or find creative ways to make some extra cash on the side. You can make some extra money by performing jobs like mowing lawns, cleaning houses, or even walking dogs for people in your neighborhood. 3. Sell stuff you don't need. You probably have at least a few possessions that you no longer need or want, and you can turn those items into extra cash by selling them to people who do want them. If you have lots of unwanted items, try having a yard sale.

Community Q&A. Question : My family barely has any money. My dad has his own company, but it hasn't gotten any business in a long time. I have some money saved up, and I was think of leaving a little in my dad's wallet. What do you think? Answer : Definitely do. Work as much as you can and give and much as you can. Also putting your family's money in a good, interest-bearing account can help a lot.

Tips. To always have money in the bank to pay regular bills, add them up for the past year and divide by 52. Round up to the next 25, 50, or 100 dollars. Remember to add in quarterly or annual bills, too. Buy clothes that can be used for several different occasions instead of only one-time events. Use coupons on items whenever you can. Start a Christmas Club account, but put in more than you expect to spend on gifts. The excess is great for a mini-vacation or special purchase. Get a jar to collect your spare change. When it's full, take it to the bank. (Don't take it to one of those coin counters, as they charge for counting your change.) Take it a day at a time. Start small, set goals, reward yourself (not with any type of shopping, of course) and enjoy playing the game.

https://wowonlinecollege.blogspot.com/

[andrewdburton]

Should I stay or should I go? Wrestling with the decision to quit a career

J.D.'s note: In the olden days at Get Rich Slowly, I shared reader stories every Sunday. I haven't done that since I re-purchased the site because nobody sends them to me anymore. But earlier this year, Mike did. I love it. I hope you will too.

Earlier this year, I sent my wife a text message: “On a scale of 1 to 10, how freaked out would you be if I quit my job this afternoon?”

My wife and I had only been married a short while, but she'd known since our second date that I didn't plan to work in my traditional job until normal retirement age. She also knew that I hadn't been very happy at work in recent months.

We're very compatible financially — both savers raised in working-class families that didn't always have a lot. We make a point of having what we like to call “Fun Family Finance Day” from time to time. On Fun Family Finance Day, we do everything from competitively checking our credit scores to discussing questions that get at the root of our money mindsets to help us create our goals.

But this question wasn't part of the plan. Not then.

And it was never on any of the lists of questions that we'd discussed with each other. It was like a pop quiz, a pothole in the smoothest relationship road I'd ever traveled…and I was the one putting it there.

Dreams Remain Dreams Without Doing

My wife and I rarely argue, but when we do it's usually about food. It's the kitchen and the grocery store that are our battleground. Our finances are fine. Thankfully, when you're confident in the life you've created and the person you chose to build it with, it's a lot easier to be honest about what's on your mind.

That still doesn't always mean you get the answer you want. Or the answer you were expecting. She responded: “Wait what. Kinda. What would you do?”

A completely reasonable and fair question. Not to mention one that I'd probably have to get comfortable answering from a lot more people.

I think my immediate reaction was: We talk about this stuff all the time, where is my, “No worries baby, YOLO!”? (I must have watched too many romcoms back before we cut cable from our lives.)

Being a grownup, it turns out, is actually really hard sometimes. I was about to learn that talking about something, and actually doing it, are a world apart.

Life is full of dreamers and doers. Sometimes those two personalities cross over. But there are plenty of people who go through life talking about so many things they'll never have the courage to try — or the discipline and determination to follow through with.

Which person was I? The dreamer? The doer? Or that fortunate combination of both?

Standing on the Ledge

There's a quote perched atop my bucket list of long-term goals:

“At some point, you will need to take a long look in the mirror and ask yourself not just if this is something you wanted to do at one point, but if this is something you will want to have done.”

Words are meaningless without action. It was time for me to take that long look in the mirror. I thought back to one of the questions that my wife and I had previously discussed: What does money mean to you? To me, once I grew out of the “stuff accumulation” phase of my early- to mid-20s, my answer had always been freedom. Money meant freedom. To my wife, the answer was security. Money meant security.

You can probably see how freedom can conflict with security. That was the case here. Not only that, but I was asking to change the perfect plan, one that she was comfortable with and excited about.

That's not one, but two shots against financial security. If I'd thought more about our financial blueprints and how they differ, I might have seen this coming from a mile away!

As I was standing on that ledge, about to quit my job, thoughts started to race through my mind. What did I actually have to lose if made the leap? Lots.

A happy relationship and marriage.

A secure job with solid income, not to mention a sixteen year investment in my career.

Great benefits, including lots of time off, health insurance, 401(k) — even a pension.

The ability to afford anything at any time without any real worry. (Our finances were already on autopilot.)

My work friends and work prestige.

The general day-to-day purpose of a job.

The opportunity to create generational wealth. If we worked until 65, the power of compounding would likely make us ridiculously wealthy.

Today at Get Rich Slowly, let's perform a little exercise. Come stand in my shoes for a minute, won't you? Join me on the ledge. Do you see the beautiful view? The endless opportunity? The excitement that's felt only at the beginning of a grand adventure, an adventure where anything is possible?

Or do you get a queasy feeling in your stomach? Do you feel like you've lost your balance, like you're on the edge of some great catastrophe? Do you see a frightening fall from grace? Does it make you want to back away immediately?

Let's go back to what it felt like to make this decision…

My Situation

I'm 38 years old. I've worked for the same company since I was 22. Corporate insurance is all I know. I'm well paid. I work from home for a solid company with good benefits, plenty of time off, and I really enjoy most of the people I work for and with.

It's the definition of stability — a solid guardrail protecting me from what lies over the ledge. So what's the problem?

A year ago, I took a new position that seemed like a great opportunity. Only it wasn't. The first misstep of my career. A year in, that spot has killed my enthusiasm and engagement. For the first time at work, I'm struggling to get things done.

As an extrovert that derives meaning from helping others, this feels like a prison. My job isn't hard because it's stressful. It's hard because it's boring me to death! And what are any of us doing thinking about personal finance and early retirement if we aren't trying to make better use of our limited time on this planet?

There's a project looming that would require some weekend work once in a while for the foreseeable future, I've avoided it in the past, but my luck is running out. My team — and, more importantly, my position — need to take it on. I understand completely. I just don't want to do it.

At this point in life, my time is way more important to me than money. The weekends and vacations are what I live for. Adventures in the mountains with my friends, quality time with my wife, our dog, and our families – that's what makes me feel alive.

Insurance? Meh.

No little kid ever said they wanted to work for an insurance company and play with spreadsheets and Powerpoint presentations when they grow up. I wanted to be a baseball player, a sports writer, even a professional forklift driver. (Because what's more badass than a forklift when you're a little kid and your dad works at a marina?)

A Glimpse of the Other Side

My wife and I just got back from a delayed honeymoon to Alaska. To say it was incredible would be an understatement. Denali. Kenai. Majestic train rides. Fjords. Glaciers. Bears. Bald eagles. Whales. Hikes.

Life slowed down.

I somehow managed to read five books while doing so many other amazing things. During our more than two weeks off, I got to see what my mind was capable of when it wasn't drowning in useless information and mundane tasks that consume my braindwidth.

We talked to people who had ended up in this wild place through a history of taking risks. Parents that had hitchhiked cross-country and ended up there back in the 70s. Can you imagine? Where we live, a fair number of people never leave their town or state!

Before the trip, I had tried to apply for a few positions. For whatever reason, it just didn't work out. I came home from an amazing glimpse into what life could be to a job that seemed like the polar opposite. (Isn't that every vacation though?) I've felt like a square peg trying to fit in a round hole for a while now. Maybe normal life just isn't for me anymore. Maybe I need something just a little less ordinary.

Should I Stay or Should I Go?

I've been practicing the classic tenets of personal finance since I was in my mid- to late-20s. I found an awesome woman in my mid-30s who just happens to be down with this lifestyle as well. We're probably two to three years short of where we want to be based on our master plan of a fully-paid house and a really comfortable number in invested assets.

We'd likely fall somewhere between Agency and Security on the stages of financial freedom.

I know good jobs don't grow on trees, especially where we live. The seasons of the economy are always shifting and there's a chill in the air. Economic winter can't be too far off. My wife still has a solid job, and we live a pretty simple life — albeit in an expensive part of the country. Our main splurge is travel, but otherwise we live well below our means.

All of this knowledge and preparation comes with a cost. Having options can be a burden too, because then you're responsible for making hard decisions. And you're responsible for the outcomes of those choices.

What other options are there?

Be a crappy employee/teammate, and still get paid? Plenty of people have played that game. Get a surgery or two, go out on leave, let performance management run its course for however long that takes, and keep cashing checks the whole time. I don't think I have it in me to put people I respect through that. It's just not who I am.

I work from home, and I still can't bring myself to abandon my laptop. What if someone needs me?

Am I giving up too soon? The finish line seems just around the corner — somehow so close yet so far away.

Should I just suck it up and sell a little more of my soul? Slump my shoulders a little bit more as I trade another piece of myself for money I don't need to buy things I don't want?

As I go back and forth, sometimes I briefly wish I'd never found the personal-finance community. Like Neo in The Matrix, why'd I have to take the damn red pill? Being a mindless consumer wasn't so bad. I would have invested 6-10% in my 401(k) with a traditional pension on top of it.

Forty years on autopilot would have produced a comfortable life of work, nice things — and maybe some time in old age to relax and travel.

Facing Freedom

The whole point of everything I've done since I started this journey was to be in control of my own life. To not be owned by things or circumstances. To have options. Freedom of choice. F-U money.

I have the corporate battle scars and survivor's guilt to understand why that's important.

I've sat on the phone while I heard that my old department was closing down. The sadness and tears in the room. Everyone that had taken me in, given me my chance, taught me the job…basically gone, casualties of a business decision.

I've seen people get laid off who are petrified because they don't know how they'll pay their bills in a couple of weeks. People will be okay eventually though, right?

What about my friend who was struggling last year and left the company? He committed suicide a few months later. Maybe everyone won't be okay eventually. Depression runs in my family. Am I really built for this? That thought is haunting.

It's been said that one of the hardest decisions you'll ever make in life is whether to walk away or try harder. Every bone in my body tells me it's time to walk away, to bet on myself.

The End?

About six months after the text exchange that blindsided my wife, with her support, I hit send on the scariest, most exciting and important one-line email of my professional career. It would also signify the unofficial end of it: “I will be resigning from my position effective Wednesday, June 26th.”

To combine a few lines from my favorite movie, The Shawshank Redemption, some birds just weren't meant to be caged. It's time to get busy living, or get busy dying.

The post Should I stay or should I go? Wrestling with the decision to quit a career appeared first on Get Rich Slowly.

from Finance https://www.getrichslowly.org/decision-to-quit-a-career/ via http://www.rssmix.com/

[thedivinefish]

TGIWednesday and a download for the dog days of summer

TGIWednesday and a Special Bonus!

Final chance to grab Fountain of Youth mp3 at the special low price with Bonus!  Others have been raving about it and I'm always flattered, but like I said to a client the other day, “I’m just the guy with the light up orange cones directing the planes to park at their respective terminals for unloading and loading passengers.”  In this case it’s unloading and loading negative or positive beliefs.  Obviously what you’re picking up or dropping off will always depend on you.  I believe the best is yet to come and that most people are still pretty good deep down and the rest of your life can be the best of your life if you’ll make a little progress every day.  Be sure to scroll down and check out the radio and video shows because there are a bunch and they are super informative, helpful and all FREE.  In case you missed the special announcement... Everyone who purchases (or has already purchased) the Fountain of Youth & Vitality MP3 will be receiving a special BONUS! We are going to host a 30-minute LIVE Zoom call on Wednesday August 28th at 8pm EDT/5pm PDT called:  "Turning on Your Youth & Vitality Switch"  I will be giving everyone a live energetic boost with specialty clearings and super-charged prayers that will turn on your youth & vitality switches and reverse your aging genes! The bonus call alone is valued at $65 at least! If you want to be on the call, just purchase the Fountain of Youth MP3 at $49 before Friday at Midnight PDT.  We'll send out a separate email to all buyers for you to claim your free spot on the call and the recording of the call is included if you can't attend live!

Restoring the Fountain of Youth & Vitality: Word tracks to heal and restore aging, by rejuvenating, stimulating and time traveling back to internal set and restore points when you were at your best!

GET IT NOW FOR JUST $49 (will be priced at $88 after Aug 16th)  Included are 50 minutes and over 200 clearings! PLUS newly added BONUS - 30-minute Live Clearings Call!

Listen to a 2-minute sample on the shop page.

Click or Tap here to Buy Now

TGIWednesday Download

~ WEATHER & LOCATION ~  

I believe think, know and feel that regardless of the temperature or my geographical location that I can and will succeed. I am ready, willing and able to be the best possible version of myself and know that things can improve. I know, when, where, how and why when directed by spirit what clothes to wear, where to go, how long to stay and when to return. I am being guided by spirit always and I am asking for this in all languages and throughout all time lines and so it is.    

FREE Weekly LIVE Healings and Messages

THURSDAY at 3pm EDT - THE ALARA CANFIELD SHOW Join me and 30+ phenomenal transformational teachers, mentors, leaders, and wayshowers on The Alara Canfield Show for wonderful conversations and experiential processes! I've been asked to join Alara and her community as we talk about how to inspire and empower you to transform your life so that you can create a life and living that you truly desire with and abundance of peace, love, joy, happiness, prosperity, and radiant health. Register online here and join me thisThursday August 15th at 3pm EDT AUGUST 29th at 5pm EDT - SOUL TALK WITH PATTY MALEK It’s time for another soul talk. I’ve been invited as a featured guest for Thursday August 29th at 5pm EDT/ 2pm PDT on Soul Talk Live w/Patty Malek. Register here and join us then! Every Tuesday at 9pm EDT - JIMMY MACK HEALING SHOW 

Join me and my guests weekly on Tuesdays at 9pm ET/ 6pm PT Call in LIVE (713)-955-0594 It's your chance to get FREE intuitive messages on my weekly radio show. My guests are some of the best psychic readers & intuitive healers on the planet!  Tune in every Tuesday night LIVE or just catch the replay & YOU will receive changes & healings just by listening!  

  To listen online, click the date links below. Listen here yesterday's replay - Dr. Rev. Kimberly Marooney Inventor/Originator of Angel Cards, Intuitive reader and healerhttp://kimberlymarooney.com/angel-expert-kimberly-marooney Listen here August 20th – Grace Hom Intuitive, healer and alchemist http://graceghom.com/ Listen Here August 27th - Rev Debbie Dienstbier Transmedium, communications with your loved ones in spirit. Profound messages from an experienced psychic medium and healer. Visit Facebook page  

Check out TheJimmyMackHealingShow.com  for a full listing & all replays! 

Live In-Person Appearances

EVERY FRIDAY at KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS TAMPA

Tampa folks come see me on FRIDAYs - I'm scheduling 15 and 30 minute appointments at Kodawari Yoga Studios from 10am-2pm. Call Kodawari's front desk directly to schedule (813) 773-4017 and pay at the concierge desk... 15 minutes 33$ or 30 minutes 65$. 3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa (813) 773-4017 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/ Book on Friday  August 16th  August 23rd August 30th

  Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime!  

"Jimmy's My Liquid Fish Change Made Simple program is AMAZING!!! He gives you not only videos so you can see the changes within people, but also the books he's written as well! On top of that he's provided all the links and visuals you need so ANY type of learner can do it!!  I appreciated having it to download in a PDF so I can go back to it any time, plus the books and ACTUAL healing sessions so you see, know and understand the whole process even better!!Highly recommend to ANYONE looking to change and make not only their life... but everyone's around them better as well!!" - E.J. / Florida

The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & Spiritual Healing Techniques ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

LEARN MORE HERE

From the Fish Box

Q & A with Jimmy Q) Thanks again for all of the information during our session today. I am still working through all of the videos that came with the Quantum Conversation package. I will probably also take your course, believing that it would be a great addition to my healing practice. However, I am still a bit unclear about the "clear", "unclear" and running forward process." - D.G.  A) "Yes those concepts are explained in the book and certainly in the course - that's a bit much to do it in 15 minutes when I've written eight books on it LOL I know you'll be feeling better." - Jimmy

Receive 24/7 Daily Prayers From Jimmy

I will dial into you daily in the wee hours and make certain that you are a CLEAR YES, UNCLEAR to NO and RUNNING FORWARD before you start your day. You will send me a list of the members of your immediate household, and yes even pets, and I will add them to my daily prayers. I will arise daily before you are even awake to start my prayers and also run my intelligent computer software 24/7 deleting the negative and increasing the strength of the positive creating a higher probability of outcomes for you and the family.  Each comes with a one-time email analysis print out via the intelligent healing software that I use on your behalf.  Most clients have had amazing results and outcomes and I get emails of thanks each and every week!

                     Choose 7 days @$33              Choose 14 days @$66           Choose 30 days @$99

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

Fish Food 

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

AUGUST  14th -    "Today I will leave no stone unturned. I will be vigilant, checking locks, windows, and doors and the safety of myself and my family. I will make certain that everyone has brushed their teeth, buckled their seat belt and is wearing clean underwear just in case."

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library. Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better.

Abundance Abuse Addiction Body Scan: Head to Toe Daily GPS Reset Dark Energies/Fears Decision Making Diet & Exercise Education & Learning Family & Relatives The Gold Coin Healing Physical Body Healing Mental Stress Holiday Stress

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Sex Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss

TGIFunny

Share

Tweet

Forward

Pinterest

Jimmy Mack 727.678.0557​ EST | Appointments Skype: Jimmy.Mack55 Clearwater Florida USA Book a 15 minute session Book a 30 minute session Book a 60 minute session ​ ​​Transformational Healing of Body, Mind​ & Spirit, People, Places, Pets & Situations!​ ​ Download the My Liquid Fish® Starter Kit (*Updated May 2019) Audio MP3 Downloads​ and books​ to improve your life! Get Certified in ​My Liquid Fish® Change Made Simple® Watch Free Videos on YouTube Weekly Radio Show Archives Shop for ​Supplements ​ http://www.jimmymackhealingshop.com www.jimmymackhealing.com Copyright ©1998-2019 All Rights Reserved  

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.smbeconnected.com  

Stay connected!

  Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

[divinefishingtips]

TGIWednesday and a download for the dog days of summer

TGIWednesday and a Special Bonus!

Final chance to grab Fountain of Youth mp3 at the special low price with Bonus!  Others have been raving about it and I'm always flattered, but like I said to a client the other day, “I’m just the guy with the light up orange cones directing the planes to park at their respective terminals for unloading and loading passengers.”  In this case it’s unloading and loading negative or positive beliefs.  Obviously what you’re picking up or dropping off will always depend on you.  I believe the best is yet to come and that most people are still pretty good deep down and the rest of your life can be the best of your life if you’ll make a little progress every day.  Be sure to scroll down and check out the radio and video shows because there are a bunch and they are super informative, helpful and all FREE.  In case you missed the special announcement... Everyone who purchases (or has already purchased) the Fountain of Youth & Vitality MP3 will be receiving a special BONUS! We are going to host a 30-minute LIVE Zoom call on Wednesday August 28th at 8pm EDT/5pm PDT called:  "Turning on Your Youth & Vitality Switch"  I will be giving everyone a live energetic boost with specialty clearings and super-charged prayers that will turn on your youth & vitality switches and reverse your aging genes! The bonus call alone is valued at $65 at least! If you want to be on the call, just purchase the Fountain of Youth MP3 at $49 before Friday at Midnight PDT.  We'll send out a separate email to all buyers for you to claim your free spot on the call and the recording of the call is included if you can't attend live!

Restoring the Fountain of Youth & Vitality: Word tracks to heal and restore aging, by rejuvenating, stimulating and time traveling back to internal set and restore points when you were at your best!

GET IT NOW FOR JUST $49 (will be priced at $88 after Aug 16th)  Included are 50 minutes and over 200 clearings! PLUS newly added BONUS - 30-minute Live Clearings Call!

Listen to a 2-minute sample on the shop page.

Click or Tap here to Buy Now

TGIWednesday Download

~ WEATHER & LOCATION ~  

I believe think, know and feel that regardless of the temperature or my geographical location that I can and will succeed. I am ready, willing and able to be the best possible version of myself and know that things can improve. I know, when, where, how and why when directed by spirit what clothes to wear, where to go, how long to stay and when to return. I am being guided by spirit always and I am asking for this in all languages and throughout all time lines and so it is.    

FREE Weekly LIVE Healings and Messages

THURSDAY at 3pm EDT - THE ALARA CANFIELD SHOW Join me and 30+ phenomenal transformational teachers, mentors, leaders, and wayshowers on The Alara Canfield Show for wonderful conversations and experiential processes! I've been asked to join Alara and her community as we talk about how to inspire and empower you to transform your life so that you can create a life and living that you truly desire with and abundance of peace, love, joy, happiness, prosperity, and radiant health. Register online here and join me thisThursday August 15th at 3pm EDT AUGUST 29th at 5pm EDT - SOUL TALK WITH PATTY MALEK It’s time for another soul talk. I’ve been invited as a featured guest for Thursday August 29th at 5pm EDT/ 2pm PDT on Soul Talk Live w/Patty Malek. Register here and join us then! Every Tuesday at 9pm EDT - JIMMY MACK HEALING SHOW 

Join me and my guests weekly on Tuesdays at 9pm ET/ 6pm PT Call in LIVE (713)-955-0594 It's your chance to get FREE intuitive messages on my weekly radio show. My guests are some of the best psychic readers & intuitive healers on the planet!  Tune in every Tuesday night LIVE or just catch the replay & YOU will receive changes & healings just by listening!  

  To listen online, click the date links below. Listen here yesterday's replay - Dr. Rev. Kimberly Marooney Inventor/Originator of Angel Cards, Intuitive reader and healerhttp://kimberlymarooney.com/angel-expert-kimberly-marooney Listen here August 20th – Grace Hom Intuitive, healer and alchemist http://graceghom.com/ Listen Here August 27th - Rev Debbie Dienstbier Transmedium, communications with your loved ones in spirit. Profound messages from an experienced psychic medium and healer. Visit Facebook page  

Check out TheJimmyMackHealingShow.com  for a full listing & all replays! 

Live In-Person Appearances

EVERY FRIDAY at KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS TAMPA

Tampa folks come see me on FRIDAYs - I'm scheduling 15 and 30 minute appointments at Kodawari Yoga Studios from 10am-2pm. Call Kodawari's front desk directly to schedule (813) 773-4017 and pay at the concierge desk... 15 minutes 33$ or 30 minutes 65$. 3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa (813) 773-4017 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/ Book on Friday  August 16th  August 23rd August 30th

  Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime!  

"Jimmy's My Liquid Fish Change Made Simple program is AMAZING!!! He gives you not only videos so you can see the changes within people, but also the books he's written as well! On top of that he's provided all the links and visuals you need so ANY type of learner can do it!!  I appreciated having it to download in a PDF so I can go back to it any time, plus the books and ACTUAL healing sessions so you see, know and understand the whole process even better!!Highly recommend to ANYONE looking to change and make not only their life... but everyone's around them better as well!!" - E.J. / Florida

The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & Spiritual Healing Techniques ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

LEARN MORE HERE

From the Fish Box

Q & A with Jimmy Q) Thanks again for all of the information during our session today. I am still working through all of the videos that came with the Quantum Conversation package. I will probably also take your course, believing that it would be a great addition to my healing practice. However, I am still a bit unclear about the "clear", "unclear" and running forward process." - D.G.  A) "Yes those concepts are explained in the book and certainly in the course - that's a bit much to do it in 15 minutes when I've written eight books on it LOL I know you'll be feeling better." - Jimmy

Receive 24/7 Daily Prayers From Jimmy

I will dial into you daily in the wee hours and make certain that you are a CLEAR YES, UNCLEAR to NO and RUNNING FORWARD before you start your day. You will send me a list of the members of your immediate household, and yes even pets, and I will add them to my daily prayers. I will arise daily before you are even awake to start my prayers and also run my intelligent computer software 24/7 deleting the negative and increasing the strength of the positive creating a higher probability of outcomes for you and the family.  Each comes with a one-time email analysis print out via the intelligent healing software that I use on your behalf.  Most clients have had amazing results and outcomes and I get emails of thanks each and every week!

                     Choose 7 days @$33              Choose 14 days @$66           Choose 30 days @$99

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

Fish Food 

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

AUGUST  14th -    "Today I will leave no stone unturned. I will be vigilant, checking locks, windows, and doors and the safety of myself and my family. I will make certain that everyone has brushed their teeth, buckled their seat belt and is wearing clean underwear just in case."

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library. Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better.

Abundance Abuse Addiction Body Scan: Head to Toe Daily GPS Reset Dark Energies/Fears Decision Making Diet & Exercise Education & Learning Family & Relatives The Gold Coin Healing Physical Body Healing Mental Stress Holiday Stress

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Sex Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss

TGIFunny

Share

Tweet

Forward

Pinterest

Jimmy Mack 727.678.0557​ EST | Appointments Skype: Jimmy.Mack55 Clearwater Florida USA Book a 15 minute session Book a 30 minute session Book a 60 minute session ​ ​​Transformational Healing of Body, Mind​ & Spirit, People, Places, Pets & Situations!​ ​ Download the My Liquid Fish® Starter Kit (*Updated May 2019) Audio MP3 Downloads​ and books​ to improve your life! Get Certified in ​My Liquid Fish® Change Made Simple® Watch Free Videos on YouTube Weekly Radio Show Archives Shop for ​Supplements ​ http://www.jimmymackhealingshop.com www.jimmymackhealing.com Copyright ©1998-2019 All Rights Reserved  

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.smbeconnected.com  

Stay connected!

  Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

[365dailyaffirmations]

TGIWednesday and a download for the dog days of summer

TGIWednesday and a Special Bonus!

Final chance to grab Fountain of Youth mp3 at the special low price with Bonus!  Others have been raving about it and I'm always flattered, but like I said to a client the other day, “I’m just the guy with the light up orange cones directing the planes to park at their respective terminals for unloading and loading passengers.”  In this case it’s unloading and loading negative or positive beliefs.  Obviously what you’re picking up or dropping off will always depend on you.  I believe the best is yet to come and that most people are still pretty good deep down and the rest of your life can be the best of your life if you’ll make a little progress every day.  Be sure to scroll down and check out the radio and video shows because there are a bunch and they are super informative, helpful and all FREE.  In case you missed the special announcement... Everyone who purchases (or has already purchased) the Fountain of Youth & Vitality MP3 will be receiving a special BONUS! We are going to host a 30-minute LIVE Zoom call on Wednesday August 28th at 8pm EDT/5pm PDT called:  "Turning on Your Youth & Vitality Switch"  I will be giving everyone a live energetic boost with specialty clearings and super-charged prayers that will turn on your youth & vitality switches and reverse your aging genes! The bonus call alone is valued at $65 at least! If you want to be on the call, just purchase the Fountain of Youth MP3 at $49 before Friday at Midnight PDT.  We'll send out a separate email to all buyers for you to claim your free spot on the call and the recording of the call is included if you can't attend live!

Restoring the Fountain of Youth & Vitality: Word tracks to heal and restore aging, by rejuvenating, stimulating and time traveling back to internal set and restore points when you were at your best!

GET IT NOW FOR JUST $49 (will be priced at $88 after Aug 16th)  Included are 50 minutes and over 200 clearings! PLUS newly added BONUS - 30-minute Live Clearings Call!

Listen to a 2-minute sample on the shop page.

Click or Tap here to Buy Now

TGIWednesday Download

~ WEATHER & LOCATION ~  

I believe think, know and feel that regardless of the temperature or my geographical location that I can and will succeed. I am ready, willing and able to be the best possible version of myself and know that things can improve. I know, when, where, how and why when directed by spirit what clothes to wear, where to go, how long to stay and when to return. I am being guided by spirit always and I am asking for this in all languages and throughout all time lines and so it is.    

FREE Weekly LIVE Healings and Messages

THURSDAY at 3pm EDT - THE ALARA CANFIELD SHOW Join me and 30+ phenomenal transformational teachers, mentors, leaders, and wayshowers on The Alara Canfield Show for wonderful conversations and experiential processes! I've been asked to join Alara and her community as we talk about how to inspire and empower you to transform your life so that you can create a life and living that you truly desire with and abundance of peace, love, joy, happiness, prosperity, and radiant health. Register online here and join me thisThursday August 15th at 3pm EDT AUGUST 29th at 5pm EDT - SOUL TALK WITH PATTY MALEK It’s time for another soul talk. I’ve been invited as a featured guest for Thursday August 29th at 5pm EDT/ 2pm PDT on Soul Talk Live w/Patty Malek. Register here and join us then! Every Tuesday at 9pm EDT - JIMMY MACK HEALING SHOW 

Join me and my guests weekly on Tuesdays at 9pm ET/ 6pm PT Call in LIVE (713)-955-0594 It's your chance to get FREE intuitive messages on my weekly radio show. My guests are some of the best psychic readers & intuitive healers on the planet!  Tune in every Tuesday night LIVE or just catch the replay & YOU will receive changes & healings just by listening!  

  To listen online, click the date links below. Listen here yesterday's replay - Dr. Rev. Kimberly Marooney Inventor/Originator of Angel Cards, Intuitive reader and healerhttp://kimberlymarooney.com/angel-expert-kimberly-marooney Listen here August 20th – Grace Hom Intuitive, healer and alchemist http://graceghom.com/ Listen Here August 27th - Rev Debbie Dienstbier Transmedium, communications with your loved ones in spirit. Profound messages from an experienced psychic medium and healer. Visit Facebook page  

Check out TheJimmyMackHealingShow.com  for a full listing & all replays! 

Live In-Person Appearances

EVERY FRIDAY at KODAWARI YOGA STUDIOS TAMPA

Tampa folks come see me on FRIDAYs - I'm scheduling 15 and 30 minute appointments at Kodawari Yoga Studios from 10am-2pm. Call Kodawari's front desk directly to schedule (813) 773-4017 and pay at the concierge desk... 15 minutes 33$ or 30 minutes 65$. 3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa (813) 773-4017 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/ Book on Friday  August 16th  August 23rd August 30th

  Go deep sea "fishing" with Jimmy!

Level 1 is open to ANYONE at anytime!  

"Jimmy's My Liquid Fish Change Made Simple program is AMAZING!!! He gives you not only videos so you can see the changes within people, but also the books he's written as well! On top of that he's provided all the links and visuals you need so ANY type of learner can do it!!  I appreciated having it to download in a PDF so I can go back to it any time, plus the books and ACTUAL healing sessions so you see, know and understand the whole process even better!!Highly recommend to ANYONE looking to change and make not only their life... but everyone's around them better as well!!" - E.J. / Florida

The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & Spiritual Healing Techniques ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

LEARN MORE HERE

From the Fish Box

Q & A with Jimmy Q) Thanks again for all of the information during our session today. I am still working through all of the videos that came with the Quantum Conversation package. I will probably also take your course, believing that it would be a great addition to my healing practice. However, I am still a bit unclear about the "clear", "unclear" and running forward process." - D.G.  A) "Yes those concepts are explained in the book and certainly in the course - that's a bit much to do it in 15 minutes when I've written eight books on it LOL I know you'll be feeling better." - Jimmy

Receive 24/7 Daily Prayers From Jimmy

I will dial into you daily in the wee hours and make certain that you are a CLEAR YES, UNCLEAR to NO and RUNNING FORWARD before you start your day. You will send me a list of the members of your immediate household, and yes even pets, and I will add them to my daily prayers. I will arise daily before you are even awake to start my prayers and also run my intelligent computer software 24/7 deleting the negative and increasing the strength of the positive creating a higher probability of outcomes for you and the family.  Each comes with a one-time email analysis print out via the intelligent healing software that I use on your behalf.  Most clients have had amazing results and outcomes and I get emails of thanks each and every week!

                     Choose 7 days @$33              Choose 14 days @$66           Choose 30 days @$99

**Can't See The Full Email? Click Here to View Online**

Fish Food 

The Daily Bread To Feed The Fish

Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

AUGUST  14th -    "Today I will leave no stone unturned. I will be vigilant, checking locks, windows, and doors and the safety of myself and my family. I will make certain that everyone has brushed their teeth, buckled their seat belt and is wearing clean underwear just in case."

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library. Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better.

Abundance Abuse Addiction Body Scan: Head to Toe Daily GPS Reset Dark Energies/Fears Decision Making Diet & Exercise Education & Learning Family & Relatives The Gold Coin Healing Physical Body Healing Mental Stress Holiday Stress

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Sex Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss

TGIFunny

Share

Tweet

Forward

Pinterest

Jimmy Mack 727.678.0557​ EST | Appointments Skype: Jimmy.Mack55 Clearwater Florida USA Book a 15 minute session Book a 30 minute session Book a 60 minute session ​ ​​Transformational Healing of Body, Mind​ & Spirit, People, Places, Pets & Situations!​ ​ Download the My Liquid Fish® Starter Kit (*Updated May 2019) Audio MP3 Downloads​ and books​ to improve your life! Get Certified in ​My Liquid Fish® Change Made Simple® Watch Free Videos on YouTube Weekly Radio Show Archives Shop for ​Supplements ​ http://www.jimmymackhealingshop.com www.jimmymackhealing.com Copyright ©1998-2019 All Rights Reserved  

-------------------------------------------------- TGIW newsletter managed by: Sandy Bidinger Digital Marketing Specialist at SMBeConnected Solutions www.smbeconnected.com  

Stay connected!

  Our mailing address is: Clearwater Florida 33756 USA

[advancedthetapractitioner]

TGIWednesday and a download for the dog days of summer

TGIWednesday and a Special Bonus!

Final chance to grab Fountain of Youth mp3 at the special low price with Bonus!  Others have been raving about it and I'm always flattered, but like I said to a client the other day, “I’m just the guy with the light up orange cones directing the planes to park at their respective terminals for unloading and loading passengers.”  In this case it’s unloading and loading negative or positive beliefs.  Obviously what you’re picking up or dropping off will always depend on you.  I believe the best is yet to come and that most people are still pretty good deep down and the rest of your life can be the best of your life if you’ll make a little progress every day.  Be sure to scroll down and check out the radio and video shows because there are a bunch and they are super informative, helpful and all FREE.  In case you missed the special announcement... Everyone who purchases (or has already purchased) the Fountain of Youth & Vitality MP3 will be receiving a special BONUS! We are going to host a 30-minute LIVE Zoom call on Wednesday August 28th at 8pm EDT/5pm PDT called:  "Turning on Your Youth & Vitality Switch"  I will be giving everyone a live energetic boost with specialty clearings and super-charged prayers that will turn on your youth & vitality switches and reverse your aging genes! The bonus call alone is valued at $65 at least! If you want to be on the call, just purchase the Fountain of Youth MP3 at $49 before Friday at Midnight PDT.  We'll send out a separate email to all buyers for you to claim your free spot on the call and the recording of the call is included if you can't attend live!

Restoring the Fountain of Youth & Vitality: Word tracks to heal and restore aging, by rejuvenating, stimulating and time traveling back to internal set and restore points when you were at your best!

GET IT NOW FOR JUST $49 (will be priced at $88 after Aug 16th)  Included are 50 minutes and over 200 clearings! PLUS newly added BONUS - 30-minute Live Clearings Call!

Listen to a 2-minute sample on the shop page.

Click or Tap here to Buy Now

TGIWednesday Download

~ WEATHER & LOCATION ~  

I believe think, know and feel that regardless of the temperature or my geographical location that I can and will succeed. I am ready, willing and able to be the best possible version of myself and know that things can improve. I know, when, where, how and why when directed by spirit what clothes to wear, where to go, how long to stay and when to return. I am being guided by spirit always and I am asking for this in all languages and throughout all time lines and so it is.    

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Tampa folks come see me on FRIDAYs - I'm scheduling 15 and 30 minute appointments at Kodawari Yoga Studios from 10am-2pm. Call Kodawari's front desk directly to schedule (813) 773-4017 and pay at the concierge desk... 15 minutes 33$ or 30 minutes 65$. 3965 Henderson Blvd Suite C Tampa (813) 773-4017 http://www.kodawariyoga.com/ Book on Friday  August 16th  August 23rd August 30th

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"Jimmy's My Liquid Fish Change Made Simple program is AMAZING!!! He gives you not only videos so you can see the changes within people, but also the books he's written as well! On top of that he's provided all the links and visuals you need so ANY type of learner can do it!!  I appreciated having it to download in a PDF so I can go back to it any time, plus the books and ACTUAL healing sessions so you see, know and understand the whole process even better!!Highly recommend to ANYONE looking to change and make not only their life... but everyone's around them better as well!!" - E.J. / Florida

The Certificate of Mastery Program includes 2 best-selling ebooks and 2 clearing audios plus written & video instructions, AND one-on-one time with Jimmy ALL for about the cost of a single 1-hr session! This online course is for anyone who is familiar with OR new to "fishing" and is ready to dive into the deep end & get results that are beyond the ordinary! It includes The Tackle Box & Spiritual Healing Techniques ebooks PLUS 2 MP3s "Clearing Dark Energies" & "Increasing Your Intuition" to help clear, strengthen and prepare your energy field for optimal “fishing” results. This is a work-at-your-own-pace curriculum that will TEACH & CLEAR you at the same time! In under 2wks you will be finished with the program and ready to fish on your own with greater results! Level II offers Practitioner Certification for those who qualify.

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From the Fish Box

Q & A with Jimmy Q) Thanks again for all of the information during our session today. I am still working through all of the videos that came with the Quantum Conversation package. I will probably also take your course, believing that it would be a great addition to my healing practice. However, I am still a bit unclear about the "clear", "unclear" and running forward process." - D.G.  A) "Yes those concepts are explained in the book and certainly in the course - that's a bit much to do it in 15 minutes when I've written eight books on it LOL I know you'll be feeling better." - Jimmy

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Tell The Fish: 365 Daily Inspirations & Affirmations

AUGUST  14th -    "Today I will leave no stone unturned. I will be vigilant, checking locks, windows, and doors and the safety of myself and my family. I will make certain that everyone has brushed their teeth, buckled their seat belt and is wearing clean underwear just in case."

For those who aren't familiar, here's the list of the MyBeliefWorks™ audio library. Find a topic that addresses your issue(s), click on the link to read more. We had a lot of help downloading & channeling these over the years & they keep getting better.

Abundance Abuse Addiction Body Scan: Head to Toe Daily GPS Reset Dark Energies/Fears Decision Making Diet & Exercise Education & Learning Family & Relatives The Gold Coin Healing Physical Body Healing Mental Stress Holiday Stress

Increasing Intuition IRS & Tax Time Love & Romance Money Mindset Moving Forward Pain Relief Pet Healing Sales & Success Sex Sleep Traveling w/Ease Work & Career Weight Loss

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Jimmy Mack 727.678.0557​ EST | Appointments Skype: Jimmy.Mack55 Clearwater Florida USA Book a 15 minute session Book a 30 minute session Book a 60 minute session ​ ​​Transformational Healing of Body, Mind​ & Spirit, People, Places, Pets & Situations!​ ​ Download the My Liquid Fish® Starter Kit (*Updated May 2019) Audio MP3 Downloads​ and books​ to improve your life! Get Certified in ​My Liquid Fish® Change Made Simple® Watch Free Videos on YouTube Weekly Radio Show Archives Shop for ​Supplements ​ http://www.jimmymackhealingshop.com www.jimmymackhealing.com Copyright ©1998-2019 All Rights Reserved  

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[timestamp-renegade-universe-blog]

Follow Through

Or, “If I had the money, I would put it where my mouth is.”

In my last post, I described the difficult set of circumstances that led me to the necessary time-out on Timestamp for a few weeks, as well as my difficult decision to throw in the towel and search for a stable income in tandem with my art efforts. In a nutshell, there is a lot of stress in this household between unstable finances, unsorted mental illness, unfounded child custody cases, and all the other normal stuff that 20-somethings deal with these days. And, as usual, I have done a poor job finding the time for self-care in order to handle it. That’s why I’ve vowed to make it a bigger priority to write on a daily basis, largely using my Timestamp blog to keep myself accountable, though I will not realistically be able to create a full post every single day. For me this will be an exercise in acknowledging and discussing mental health issues that I have previously avoided for fear of social stigma. For you, this may just be the inner dialogue of a traumatized introvert, but I hope that it would one day find community. While I am nervous to work through these issues in a public forum on my business page, I also have to stand by the fact that I am Timestamp, and my mentality/ mental health is a huge part of what and how I create.  

So here’s my start.

Took time to reduce my anxiety before getting out of bed? Check. Been in contact with my therapist this morning? Check. Working on processing my situation through writing? The time has come.

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Two posts ago I was talking a big game about the methods that I use to reduce some of my anxiety and increase mindfulness when I’m continually working from home like an isolated loser for 14 hour days. Although I have a lot more to deal with than anxiety, I’ve recently found out, these have been instrumental tools in keeping my head on straight when there’s no one around to lean on.

As much as I love my alone time and find energy in working in my own environment without interruption, I also have to say that it can be really demoralizing and lonely to be manically working at home all day every day. With all of my best friends and family still residing in Illinois, the only human I have around here is my significant other, who has a very demanding schedule outside of the house (thank god, because having another party in my space 24/7 is also not the solution for me).

Without social support when I’m starting to feel the tickles of anxiety growing, I realized early on in my small business adventure that I needed to find other instruments to lean on when I’m losing my grip. These are the ways I’ve reliably used to contend with my loneliness and generalized anxiety:

Podcasts  - You know how when you haven’t seen or spoken to another human being in about two days, and you start to talk to yourself, your dog, and your guinea pig instead? Yeah, right, me either… but if I did, I would recommend that you switch to hearing other people talk on these podcasts.  I spend most of my days continually streaming podcasts in the background, whether I’m writing for my day job or hand painting a new piece of furniture. They are amazingly comforting, not only for reducing the uncomfortable silence in an empty house and stimulating your brain with subtle conversation, but also for addressing mental health and philosophical life issues if you tune into the right programs. Here are my favorites:

On Being – Good god, I wish I could have Krista Tippett in my life, calmly narrating my existence and bringing up the most thoughtful, perspective-changing questions known to man. This program is life-changing. My only regret is that it took me so long to find On Being, when I have been individually questioning the meaning of it all for 20 years at this point. Every episode is 53 minutes long edited, and about 120 minutes long unedited, if you want to hear both versions of the conversation like some people do… cough. The premise is simple, ex-journalist, theologian, and author Krista Tippett has long, organic conversations with the most interesting humans you never knew you needed to have in your life. The conversations tackle issues of mindfulness, psychology, individual spirituality, and philosophy, with a dabbling of current science for good measure. The interviewees come from hugely diverse backgrounds, some of which you might expect, including a prevalence of poets and social change leaders. However, you won’t get off that easy; often the guests are quite unexpected for a left-wing public radio show, and can be challenging to approach with an open mind such as the episodes with Glenn Beck or a panel of pro-life pastors. No matter the topic, every episode is thoroughly surprising and grounding. I gain such a sense of peace and perspective from the wisdom of these enormously influential people. I can’t say enough about the grace and depth of the conversations, or the appreciation I’ve developed for thoughtful pauses before profound answers. I want to be Krista Tippett when I grow up.

The Mindset Zone – This one is fairly self-explanatory, although the host’s voice is anything but. Ana Melikian, a Psychologist and business coach with the most unique “generally European” accent I’ve ever heard, leads these short episodes that tackle the issue of mental health in small business. Finding this podcast felt like a message from the heavens, and it came during a time when I was fully losing my battle with business anxiety earlier this year. Each episode tackles a specific issue or guest relating to the mental health management that must take place to open a new business. I’ll be honest when I say that the programs are a bit hit or miss for me. Occasionally they can be redundant or feel like advertisements for her business coaching techniques, but often they are full of the exact insight I need to hear. Is it normal to be completely overwhelmed and disgruntled about the vast number of hats you must wear in small business? Yes. Does everyone doubt what they’re doing and feel the drive to retreat to a safer option? Sure do. Is failure a necessary event to be accepted and learned from, rather than feared? Yep. The messages of the episodes are simple, eye opening, and unifying. As is always the case with mental health, just hearing that what I’ve been experiencing is normal was a huge relief; in fact, this podcast is what inspired me to begin writing more openly about the issue of mental health management in my own small business. It is a topical and useful journey, with plenty of unintended laughs at Ana’s pronunciations. Sorry Ana.

Sex and Other Human Activities – Oh man, do I love the Cave Comedy Radio/Last Podcast Network. These guys are meant to be my best friends and my best friends’ best friends; they just don’t know it yet. We’re mildly obsessed, and diligently plotting ways to prove our worth as the next generation of SOHA hosts, since these two have taken a break from the program to work on other projects. Anyways, this particular show features two of my favorite CCR/LPN hosts, Jackie Zebrowski and Marcus Parks, who openly and honestly discuss their battles with mental illness, as well as answering listener questions on the same topics. Both hosts are fantastically hilarious in my exact style of humor, and very transparent when it comes to the relationship, work, and general life difficulties that come hand in hand with attempting to better understand and control your own psychology. They are incredibly relational, and speak honestly about their successes as well as failures in sorting out depression, anxiety, bi-polar disorder, self-doubt, and anger. Though there are plenty of laughs, it’s also clear that Jackie and Marcus care a great deal about the topics, and there are many difficult episodes that took considerable courage to record. Again, there is enormous power in this program simply from hearing that you aren’t alone in your battles. Listening to the accounts from two people of similar age and mentality, working through their issues and preaching the importance of self-kindness and professional care feels like receiving guiding support from my best friends, on-demand.  I could talk endlessly about my love for all the CCR/LPN guys, but I’ll hold off for an inevitable road trip entry.

Walks – An oldie but a goodie, exercise is a crucial way to work through my emotions and ground myself when my stomach starts to tighten up in a knot. A huge part of mindfulness is observing the breath and bodily sensations, and for me the best free version of this is going on a brisk hike. There’s nothing like getting out into uninterrupted nature and connecting with my feet in order to let go of the rushing thoughts in my head. I gain so much peace from a long solo walk, where I can connect with my worries and allow myself the space to process them. This is a tool I’ve used for many years, though back in Illinois it was fulfilled through walking to and from work each day, long walks around campus on every break, and usually ending with a late evening walk either alone or with my sidekick Jacq. When my dog Jake came into my life, he became a huge motivator to keep up the practice even during dark times when I had trouble executing this style of self-care. Nowadays, the truly amazing part is our proximity to beautiful and dynamic hiking trails in Stone Mountain, which far outweigh the residential streets I used to stomp down in Urbana, Illinois when it comes to peace-bringing. The difficult part, however, is managing my anxiety long enough just to get to the park. Any deviation or distraction from my work each day carries an enormous stress load with it, so the act of going out and reducing my anxiety actually inspires a mountain of distress in the hours leading up to my departure. I do my best to remind myself that this is a critical tool for mindfulness and I need to address my issues rather than working as a means of distraction, but it’s always difficult to permit myself time for self-care. Acknowledging these difficulties in my personality, I’ve come up with three strategies to reduce the likelihood of ditching my park plans;

Arrange with a friend to chat during the walk. When there is a sense of duty, i.e. a promise I made to someone else, I have no problem following through with my plans. I’ve found it helpful, and socially positive, to talk on the phone with my friend during her lunch break as I get my exercise in. This gives me a set time to take a break from my work, prepare, and get to the park on time with a party holding me accountable. I can disappoint myself, but I can’t disappoint other people.

Leverage “shitty work days” to promote breaks at the park. There are days when I work exclusively on Timestamp projects, and I’m happy as a clam from sunup to sundown. Then there are days when I have to write and edit endless articles to pay the bills. These are the days that my brain struggles the most. Without working towards something I’m passionate about, my mind tends to get restless and wander. I have a hard time keeping my head in the game, and instead it can begin to slide into some hefty doom and gloom thinking. Sometimes, there are so many external thoughts flying around in there that I can’t concentrate on my arduous and boring task at hand any longer. I begin to lose my focus, become exhausted, and slip into a depressive state. That’s when it’s time to allow myself the luxury of a walk, in order to reset and reapproach the rest of the work day with newfound productivity.

Set a nighttime walk intention. I’ve found that there is far less anxiety and guilt associated with taking my walk at night, rather than in the middle of my day. This allows me to get all the work done that simply can’t wait before I attempt to pull myself away from the project. If, for whatever reason, I haven’t made as much progress as I wanted to by the time evening falls, I still have less guilt giving myself some space when it’s already 8pm. Of course, I’ve considered switching this to morning walks so I could calm down before my work day even started, but have yet to make this attempt, as I currently use my early mornings to get unwanted writing jobs out of the way.

Social support – We all know, your support network is the most important tool in living with mental illness. That being said, for someone with a tendency to avoid and isolate when they need help the most, it can be a huge challenge to even go and seek social support. As a verified introvert, masochist, and devotee to the idea that my existence is a burden to everyone I know, I generally do the wrong thing in these situations. In the past two or three months, I’ve made a big push to get over my fear of bothering people, and attempt to contact folks when I’m having a hard time. It can be my best friend, my therapist, or even my mother if I’m feeling desperate enough. 9 times out of 10, it results in an honest and caring conversation that helps me greatly in working through whatever problem is at hand, and I have a lasting boost of self-esteem from the interaction. Even if we can’t resolve the issue, just having the reassurance that my friends and family haven’t forgotten about me and still care about my well-being from hundreds of miles away relieves many of my greatest fears. As a bonafied one-man island in bad times, my saving graces for forcing social support on myself are:

My outgoing and extroverted boyfriend. Even though he may not always understand why I’m so crippled by imaginary worries, he’ll always listen to them. At times he can do the unthinkable and convince me to do better with his own social and optimistic nature. He always wants to spend time together and to get out of the house, and this social insistence can be a gift.

My best friends who have their own battles and insights on mental health. Not only do I have a best friend who works professionally as a clinical therapist, but most of the people I surround myself with have similar struggles. We understand one another and feel less judgement talking about the things we deal with, besides the fact that their own needs for support often keep me accountable for their sake, if not my own.

My group messages with friends back home. Reaching out and talking is hard when you feel like your life is empty and depressing. If there’s no news to share, it’s hard to call someone up just to chat. That’s why these stupid facebook messenger groups are such a helpful tool for feeling social without the pressure of actually being social. The continual chatter amongst friends helps me to feel connected to my old crew on a daily basis, even when I personally don’t feel like I have anything to talk about.

Creativity - Clearly, this one rings true for me. As I’ve stated earlier, I can work on my artistic projects from dawn til dusk without feeling an inkling of anxiety or mental duress. I realize that not everyone is as enthusiastic about making things as I am, but I believe there is some real power in accessing this part of the brain. Maybe doodling, instagramming, or zen coloring is more your style - there are plenty of options. Something about the process of thinking creatively seems to be incompatible with the pathways that cause my stress and anxiety, so one can’t happen in tandem with the other. This is great when I’m in a creative mindset and naturally fend off looming anxiety; conversely it’s very difficult when I’m in a negative mindset and battling to reach a place of creativity. Here are the ways I’ve found to get past the mental gymnastics, and get into the artistic zone:

Having some sort of a schedule. As I mentioned a bit earlier, I’ve realized that it makes sense for me to get my writing assignments completed in the morning. This allows me to set aside the stress of looming busy work, earn myself a sense of achievement, and open my mind to other tasks I want to complete. Now, I don’t rigidly schedule my writing work because just as there are times I feel creative and times I do not, there are also times I feel like writing and times I simply can’t. Maybe my head hurts too badly to look at the computer screen, or maybe I’m not feeling the creative juices flowing that particular time of that particular day. That’s when flexibility is important, so I can find fulfillment in accomplishing the tasks that best mesh with my mental state, and I can achieve the most productive day possible.  

Setting my intentions for the day one on the night before. Sometimes, it’s anxiety inducing just to wake up in the morning and look at my long list of business to-do’s. Should I be wrapping up this big desk, working on my newest set of prints, posting to Instagram, writing a blog, fixing my website bugs, posting new items to Etsy, checking on my sales around town, etc, etc, etc. It never ends. If I can just work through these options in the evening beforehand, coming up with a general list of priorities to focus on, I can hit the ground running the next day. Sounds simple, but usually it’s easier to finish up a long day of work and push the topic to the backburner for the rest of the night, than to begin planning the next busy day.

Writing. I huge problem I must overcome regularly is my brain’s penchant for repetitive thinking. If something is on my mind, I have a difficult time pushing it aside to focus on new tasks. My mind cycles through what’s bothering me again and again, bringing up the same physical reactions each time the sentiment goes passing through. This is why writing has so much power for me. Putting these concerns down on paper or keyboard is an excellent release from the merry-go-round of worry. It allows me to process exactly what I’m feeling about the issue, to solidify the issue as something that I am acknowledging, and to form a plan on how to deal with it. After that, I can move on from the problem with greater ease, and apply all that brain energy to another item.

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All I’m meaning to say here is, it can be difficult to allow yourself the “luxury” of caring for yourself and your mental health, especially when your focus is always on taking care of business. There’s nothing to stop you from putting your own physical and emotional needs aside when things are stressful, at the times when you need self-care the most. I’m no expert in the field of personal kindness, but I increasingly recognize that it’s important to improve these skills as necessary tools for a functional life. It’s certainly something that takes practice and a mindful outlook to make some of these changes reality, but the continued exercise only cements the positive effects further each time. I’ll be working on and expanding these practices for the rest of my life. I can only hope that my self-compassion continues to grow, and I can help another restless soul or two just by sharing how difficult it can feel to tackle these small measures, but how relieving it feels afterwards.

And remember, you’re alright kid, I don’t care what other people say.

[apartmentdiet]

7 helpful posts from /r/personalfinance

One of my favorite things to read is /r/personalfinance.

Here are seven of my favorite posts from the sub — and what YOU can learn from them.

7 valuable Reddit personal finance posts

1. “Paying rent isn’t throwing away money.”

If I ever go bald, know it’s because I tore my hair out every time I heard people say this.

From the /r/personalfinance thread:

While it is true that when you buy a home a portion of your monthly mortgage payment will be going to principal, and therefore you are paying yourself in some ways, however, the cost of home ownership is significant. Some of the lesser known costs include the lack of flexibility, stress, the risk of home price declines, home maintenance, real estate taxes, and HOA fees.

These are also known as phantom costs — the expenses you don’t normally consider when you buy a house.

OP also offers a great mental reframing of rent, saying, “As human beings, there are several things we need to survive, including food and shelter. Paying money for rent is no more a ‘waste’ of money than paying for food is.”

For more, be sure to check out my article on real estate investing myths and my post on how to buy a house.

2. “Your parents took decades to furnish their house.”

It’s easy to look at someone successful and compare yourselves to them. You start feeling like you aren’t doing enough to reach your own goals and might try to rush things to achieve their level of success.

In reality, the most successful people devoted a lot of time and energy into getting to where they are — and you should do the same.

That’s what’s at the heart of this thread about the importance of patience when it comes to your goals:

If you’re just starting out, remember that it took your parents decades to collect all the furniture, decorations, appliances, etc you are used to having around. It’s easy to forget this because you started remembering things a long while after they started out together, so it feels like that’s how a house should always be.

It’s impossible for most people starting out to get to that level of settled in without burying themselves in debt. So relax, take your time, and embrace the emptiness! You’ll enjoy the house much more if you’re not worried about how to pay for everything all the time.

So whether you’re saving for your wedding or trying to get out of debt, know that these things take time and that’s okay. Once you stop worrying about trying to accomplish your goals quickly, you can focus your mental energy on the things you can control to accomplish your goals.

3. “I found out a coworker with the same job is making twice as much as me.”

A fascinating story about a research assistant who finds out she’s being paid MUCH less than a coworker who joined six months after she got the job.

When she raised the issue to management, her boss tried pulling some corporate trickery that’s common with bad companies:

One week later she called me into her office. She absolutely berated me for thinking I could move into the coordinator position for which I was already doing the work, and complained about my work performance. Last month I had an evaluation, and received very high praise for my performance, and there has not ever been complaints about my performance in the past. All in all, I assume she was making excuses not to increase my pay.

Eventually, she was able to find a job at another place that offered her more than she was currently earning — which led to a bidding war between her old boss and her new employer (aka the best position you could possibly be in as a job seeker).

A few lessons for job seekers from this post:

Negotiate mercilessly. OP could have just shrugged her shoulders and kept quiet when she found out she could be earning more — BUT she didn’t. She addressed the issue and now has two different companies vying for her work. That’s why it’s always in your best interest to negotiate your salary even if you think you’re earning enough.

Adopt an abundance mindset. It’s easy to take any job offer that comes your way — especially when money’s tight. OP had two job offers and knew that if one didn’t work out, the other would be there for her. This is also known as an abundance mentality, and it can be a powerful mental shift for the way you approach finances.

Know your worth. The first step to any salary negotiation is knowing how much you’re worth. While websites like Glassdoor or PayScale can help you get a good sense of this, talking to people in your field about their earnings can give you a sense of what you should be making (like OP did). So don’t be afraid to ask. Top Performers do all they can to know what they’re worth.

Be sure to check out my article on how to negotiate your salary and the Briefcase Technique for more.

4. What to do when a loved one dies.

When tragedy strikes, you find yourself asking questions you’ve never even considered before. This /r/personalfinance thread tries to answer one of those questions: How do I handle my finances when someone I love dies?

While the post deals with money accounts and estate issues beautifully, it also goes into the more lesser known parts of dealing with death, like where to get an urn:

The funeral home won’t tell you this, but you don’t have to buy things like urns and whatnot from them. I chose to, because the prospect of receiving a plastic baggie with my husband’s ashes that I would have to deal with was horrifying. A friend bought an urn for his father’s ashes on Amazon. There are options that are cheaper than the funeral home, but I chose to pay the obscene markup so that I wouldn’t have to deal with the logistics.

Overall, it’s a great read for anyone — even if you haven’t suffered any personal tragedies. It’s an excellent perspective on life, death, and where our finances fit in between it all.

5. “We decided not to buy a bearded dragon.”

For some, a Rich Life means a new car, ordering appetizers at restaurants, or paying off their debt. For others, it’s a desert lizard chilling out in a reptile aquarium in their living room.

Or at least that’s what one Reddit user thought when he got ready to buy a bearded dragon for his son’s birthday. When he ran the numbers though, he realized that the investment he’d be making into the pet would be much more than he bargained for.

[We] learned it needs expensive UV bulbs that last about 6 months and are about $40 each. Also the electricity cost the run this heat 24 hours can be a drain on the electric bill.

Also the beardie needs to go to the vet every 6 months for a checkup. And finally, food. They have a very diverse diet and can eat up to $15 per week in foods. So I did a total cost analysis for a beardie that lives 12 years and it turned out to be a whopping $10,000.

This is a great example of figuring out what fits into your Rich Life. I’m a big believer in spending on the things you truly love and ignoring the rest. So if you believe that a bearded dragon will help you live your Rich Life, by all means buy that lizard!

However, if you find that the benefits of caring for a reptile native to sweltering deserts for a decade aren’t worth the money and energy, don’t worry about it. Your Rich Life is what YOU make of it.

Also LOL at this robotically cold statement from a commenter: “It’s about ROI on the pet. Dogs are more fulfilling companions than a lizard. At least that’s the case with OP.”

6. What to do when you lose everything in a fire.

Sometimes we do all we can to prevent disaster — but it ends up happening anyway. Case in point: Losing everything you own in a fire like this OP.

One former insurance worker offered their incredibly insightful advice on how the insurance company is going to approach the situation and what OP should do to get the most out of his claims.

The biggest takeaway: Use the truth to your advantage. The commenter then used an example of how one guy used his situation to net him a five-figure insurance claim.

I remember one specific customer … he had some old, piece of shit projector (from mid-late 90s) that could stream an equally piece of shit consumer camcorder. Worth like $5 at a scrap yard. It had some oddball fucking resolution it could record at, though — and the guy strongly insisted that we replace with “Like Kind and Quality” (trigger words). Ended up being a $65k replacement, because the only camera on the market happened to be a high-end professional video camera (as in, for shooting actual movies). $65-goddam-thousand-dollars because he knew that loophole, and researched his shit.

This goes to illustrate a big point when it comes to anything insurance related: Do your research. Once you know the rules of the game you’re playing (whether it be taxes, insurance, or salary negotiations), the better positioned you are to win.

7. Explain it like I’m 18/22/30/40.

These threads are the perfect place to start if you’re completely new to the world of personal finance (aside from IWT of course).  

These guides break down important themes for your personal finance journey at different stages of your life. They are:

ELI18. For when you’re out of the house for the first time and wouldn’t recognize a 401k if it walked up to you and slapped the fidget spinner out of your hand. Great advice on topics like opening bank accounts, applying for a credit card, and even finding a roommate.

ELI22. So you’ve graduated college and are out in the “real world.” Scary right? This post makes it a little less scary by providing a solid introduction to taxes, contributing to retirement, and paying off your student loans.

ELI30. When you’re 30, a whole new crop of financial questions start coming up. How do I handle money when I get married? How do I buy a house? I have a dog … that’s like taking care of a baby right? This comprehensive post helps answer a few of those questions.

ELI40. The name of the game at 40 and beyond is retirement — rather, it’s making sure your investments are best positioned for when you retire. This post is a great primer on planning for the future and beyond.

Why I LOVE /r/PersonalFinance

You probably wouldn’t say anything if a friend or coworker tells you about a money decision you don’t agree with (racking up credit card debt, buying a house with little income, etc.). But if you saw the same issues on Reddit personal finance, you’d let the world know exactly how you feel about their issues and what you’d do instead.

It’s this level of honesty that helps us see how people really use money — and how to use it yourself.

Whether you’re in your forties planning out your retirement or you’re still in high school trying to figure out what to do with your paycheck, I’m glad you’re here.

I want to give you something that can help you take your personal finances to the next level:

The Ultimate Guide to Personal Finance

In it, you’ll learn how to:

Master your 401k: Take advantage of free money offered to you by your company … and get rich while doing it.

Manage Roth IRAs: Start saving for retirement in a worthwhile long-term investment account.

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Enter your info below and get on your way to living a Rich Life today.

7 helpful posts from /r/personalfinance is a post from: I Will Teach You To Be Rich.

[ncmagroup]

Written by David Ly Khim

How does Elon Musk think?

That’s what I aimed to discover while researching the habits behind his unbelievable success. Musk is arguably the most impressive living human being on earth. For proof, here’s his track record: 

Oh yeah, and he’s one of only two people to found three billion dollar companies. Not bad.

The crazy part is he doesn’t care that he’s worth billions. In fact, he’s annoyed with journalists asking about him. He wants them to ask about the bigger, worldly problems he’s trying to solve. He’s not focused on his existence, he’s focused on the existence of humanity — sustainable energy, clean transportation, and interplanetary space travel. 

How does he think? What are his mental frameworks? What makes him tick? I scoured through dozens of interviews to unravel his six most compelling lessons … and turned them into actionable exercises. 

These lessons (and accompanying exercises) have changed my life.

Elon Musk Advice

Seek criticism

Challenge your existing beliefs

Narrow your focus

Create a backup plan

Practice for failure

Have a big impact

Complete the following exercises, based off the psychology of Elon Musk, and they might change your life, too.

Access the exercises to follow the lessons:

Click here to access the Google Doc and Evernote worksheets

  Lesson 1: Seek criticism

Criticism is like exercise. In the beginning, it’s tough. But it slowly shapes us into healthier people and leads to many long-term benefits. While compliments create contentment, criticism creates improvement.

And when your mission for SpaceX is “interplanetary co-existence” and Tesla “transforming sustainable energy for humanity” (yes, those are Elon Musk’s words), you cannot be content. For example:

“When I spoke with someone about the Tesla Model S, I didn’t really want to know what’s right about the car. I want to know what’s wrong about the car.

When my friends get a product, I ask them to please not tell me what they like. Rather, tell me what you don’t like. And if I’ve asked that a few times of people, then they will start automatically telling me without me having to always ask the question.”

“You should take the approach that you’re wrong. Your goal is to be less wrong.”

– Elon Musk

Action Steps:

1. Write down five people who would give you brutally honest criticism. This could be your coworkers, direct manager, significant other, close friends, or even your parents.

2. Call, text, or email them asking about one area you should fix. Encourage brutal honesty. This is how my conversation went with one of my five people:

Me: “Hey Tim, so … this might sound a little weird. And maybe slightly uncomfortable, but if you’re willing, I’d love your help with something.”

Tim: “Uhhh … sure? Is everything okay?”

Me: “Yeah, everything’s okay. What’s something I do that bothers you? Or something you think I can improve? And I want your brutally honest feedback. Don’t hold back. If you think it’ll hurt my feelings, it won’t. And if you don’t have an answer right now, no problem. Just think on it and I’ll get back to you.”

Tim: “Hmm that’s an interesting question. Let me think about it…”

Having them dwell on the question has always resulted in better feedback as they think more deeply about it. I’d suggest this approach.

  Lesson 2: Challenge reality (by understanding the fundamentals)

Einstein said, “You can’t solve problems with the same thinking that caused them.” Musk couldn’t agree more.

For example, people have said battery packs will always be expensive, because they’re expensive to make, and that’s just is how it is. Yet Musk realized when you break down batteries into their fundamental components (cobalt, nickel, aluminum, carbon, polymers, and a steel can) and build your own batteries, costs go down dramatically.

This led to Tesla Energy or revolutionary energy storage for sustainable homes and businesses. By challenging the status quo, Musk developed home energy storage that’s causing radical change.

Most of us aren’t creating revolutionary shifts in energy consumption. So how does this lesson apply to the rest of us? Simply put, it means questioning when someone (or yourself) says, “That’s just how it is and how it’s always been.”

Upset the status quo. Ask tough questions. Explore the fundamental truths behind the challenges in your life. Explore how things really work by making “why” your favorite question to ask.

“Boil things down to the most fundamental truths. Then reason up from there.”

– Elon Musk

Action Steps:

1. Write down your biggest challenge right now, whether that’s personal or professional.

2. Break down that problem to its most basic components.

For example, if you’re struggling to acquire customers, ask yourself possible reasons why. Discover the potential places they could come from, such as referrals, inbound marketing, paid advertisements, and/or word-of-mouth, then explore the inputs for each channel. Continue exploring inputs until arriving at the most fundamental components.

3. After understanding the fundamental inputs, how can each of those smaller components be improved upon, changed, or executed completely differently? Use this to work backward, starting with the fundamentals.

  Lesson 3:

Focus on signal over noise 

Elon Musk isn’t the only billionaire preaching the power of focus. Warren Buffet had his notorious “not-to-do list.” Steve Jobs consistently preached a focused mindset by saying, “Deciding what not to do is as important as deciding what to do.” And according to Noah Kagan, Facebook employee #30, Mark Zuckerberg once said, “I will not entertain ANY idea unless it helps Facebook grow the total number of users.”

Musk follows the same principles. Except he will not entertain any idea beyond product development. For example, many companies put more money into marketing than they do engineering. Musk would rather minimally promote an incredible product than promoting the living hell out of a mediocre one:

“At Tesla, we’ve never spent any money on advertising. We’ve put all our money into R&D, engineering, design, and manufacturing to build the best car possible. When we consider spending money, we ask, ‘Will this create a better product?’ If not, we don’t proceed with spending the money.”

Stephen Covey calls this putting first things first. Focus on what matters, ignore the rest.

 “Will this activity result in a better product? If not, stop those efforts.”

– Elon Musk

Action Steps:

1. Create a list of 20 goals you have for the next year.

2. Reduce that list to five goals. It’s incredibly challenging to narrow these down, but once you do, you’ll experience rapid progress.

The Extra Mile: Elon Musk’s co-founding partner at PayPal, Peter Thiel, suggested having not five goals … but one. He calls this “the one thing” principle.

  Lesson 4: Make failure an option (by defining a contingency plan)

I believe inaction is caused by fear. Particularly, the fear of failure. We don’t apply for our dream job because we’re afraid we won’t get it (which makes us feel crappy about ourselves). We don’t approach the attractive person across the room because we’re afraid we’ll say something stupid. We don’t start a company because we’re afraid we’ll waste our money and fail.

When you’re starting a company with a mission for interplanetary exploration, failure is a viable option. Instead of throwing in the towel, Elon Musk anticipated failure and created a contingency plan for SpaceX:

“If we don’t get the first SpaceX rocket launch to succeed by the time we’ve spent $100 million, we will stop the company. That will be enough for three attempted launches.”

What happened to the first launch? $30 million later, it failed. The second? $60 million later, it failed. On the third and last attempt, SpaceX successfully launched. This won a $1.6 billion contract from NASA for 12 resupply flights to the station. Not bad Elon Musk, not bad at all.

Was Elon Musk afraid of failure? Absolutely. But did he create a plan to address possible failure? Yes. And that’s precisely what made him put rockets into space.

“Failure is an option here. If things are not failing, you are not innovating enough.”

– Elon Musk

Action Steps:

1. What’s a project you’ve been meaning to take on but haven’t gotten to yet? You just “don’t have time,” or you’ve convinced yourself you’re not good enough. Write down that “I really need to do that someday” project.

For example, one of the small projects I’ve wanted to do is create an e-commerce store using Shopify and sell t-shirts. It’s not huge, and there’s little to be lost, but it’s the fear of failure that has been stopping me. What if it doesn’t work out and it’s a waste of time?

2. Write down the absolute worst-case scenario.

For me, the worst-case scenario is that no one buys a t-shirt (not even my mom) and I end up wasting money and time on designing and printing t-shirts.

3. Now break that into 10 smaller sections on what would cause the worst-case scenario. Discard the problems you have no control over.

4. Create a contingency plan for each problem you can control.

In the case of my hypothetical t-shirt company, to lower costs, I could use a service like Teespring to keep my overhead to a minimum. If t-shirts don’t sell, there are other types of apparel to test like jogger pants (which are really popular now) and tank tops (hello summer). I think I’ll go start a line of t-shirts now.

  Lesson 5: Remove worries (by living the worst-case scenario)  

After defining worst-case scenarios and addressing solutions to potential problems (i.e. a contingency plan), we can still feel afraid. The best way to remove fear is by literally putting yourself in that horrible situation and asking how you feel.

For example, when Elon Musk decided he wanted to be an entrepreneur at 17 years old, he forced himself to live off $1 per day (the typical struggle of an entrepreneur). At that time, he lived mainly off hot dogs and oranges.

Elon didn’t do it because he was poor. He did it to see if he had what it takes to lead the life as an entrepreneur. And since he was successful with this experiment, he knew that money wouldn’t be an issue.

Experimenting with a reduced income showed Musk he could do it. This pushed him into entrepreneurship. 

“I figured if I could live off a dollar a day then, at least from a food standpoint, it’s pretty easy to earn $30 a month.”

– Elon Musk

Action Steps:

1. Ask yourself how you can simulate the worst-case scenario from lesson #4. Imagine you’re living that worst-case scenario right now. Write down what that would feel like … and write it in excruciating detail. How does it feel? Describe those feelings.

2. If you believe you could get through your worst-case scenario (after imagining how it feels), go out and simulate this scenario in real life.

When I got hired by HubSpot and prepared to move my life from Southern California to Boston, my biggest concern was being in a new city where I literally knew no one. That feeling of loneliness made me nervous as I booked my one-way plane ticket and packed my life up into one suitcase.

“How would I meet new people in Boston?” By talking to random people. “What if they don’t want to talk to me?” Then, move on to the next person. Sounds easy in theory. But I was still scared.

I decided to challenge myself during the weeks leading up to my flight. Even though I was still in my hometown, I actively made the effort to speak to strangers. Whether it was at a coffee shop or if I was eating alone, I would strike up small talk and, while some conversations went nowhere, others became enjoyable conversations.

When I got to Boston, sure, I was still nervous — but I knew what to do.

  Lesson 6: Solve Problems Beyond Yourself

Many of us (I’m guilty of this myself) focus on finding a fun, secure, and challenging job that makes us happy. We ask about the salary. About the benefits. And the culture. But are we asking if our work is making an impact on the world? Are we using today to solve tomorrow’s problems? Are we forward thinking?

Elon Musk didn’t ask himself, “What are some of the best ways I can make money?” Instead, as he left PayPal, he asked himself, “What are some of the problems that are likely to affect the future of humanity?”

Musk never mentions profit in interviews. He discusses SpaceX’s goal to make humanity into a multi-planetary species, or Tesla’s goal to accelerate the world’s movement toward having most electric cars.

He solves problems not to improve his world, but the world.

“If something is important enough, even if the odds are against you, you should still do it.”

– Elon Musk

Action Steps:

1. Write down the projects you are working on right now.

2. Ask yourself, “Am I solving a problem beyond myself?” If not, write down the steps needed to reach that level.

   An Honest Reflection 

Will I ever start the next Tesla, SpaceX, or other company that’s literally changing the course of humanity? Honestly, probably not. What I will do is continually apply Elon Musk’s mental frameworks to improve my life.

When I receive a compliment, I’ll ask what I can improve. Faced with a tough problem, I’ll break it down into the fundamentals. When distracted, I’ll remember the billionaires all have one similar trait — focus. I won’t be afraid of failure because I’ll make it an option (and live it). And finally, as my life progresses, I’ll challenge my existence by continuing to evaluate worldly problems and what I can do to help.

Encourage criticism. Dissect the fundamentals. Focus on high-impact activities. Push myself to failure. Challenge my limits. But most importantly, solve problems beyond me.

Will you do the same?

  Go to our website:   www.ncmalliance.com

6 Life-Changing Lessons, Advice, & Tips From Elon Musk Written by David Ly Khim How does Elon Musk think? That’s what I aimed to discover while researching the habits behind his unbelievable success.