#this perfectly encapsulates how i see her in my mind

[romchat]

In Blossom visual analysis (ep. 1-7): How to film a gothic romance

Although I'm not completely convinced about some of the writing choices of In Blossom, I absolutely LOVE the show's production design and cinematography. @mademoiselle-red wrote a great post about how main character Pan Yue fits the gothic romantic lead archetype, and those gothic elements are not only present in the script but also in the show's visual storytelling.

Lighting

A key element of gothic romance is its atmosphere of mystery and suspense.

Something I really like about In Blossom is that despite its dark subject matter, many of its scenes take place during the day. One of the show's main themes is that appearances can be misleading and the cinematography often plays with that notion by linking light to deception and darkness to truth. Note how many of the emotionally honest beats of Yang Caiwei and Pan Yue's relationship happen at night (e.g., their couple escapades at the Li Residence, Ghost Market, and Life and Death gambling house) while fakery, corruption, and evildoing happen in the day. It's with this subversion of our expectations for light that the show creates an unsettling atmosphere.

And these lighting choices also help set up Pan Yue as a classic gothic romance anti-hero, someone the female lead, Yang Caiwei, fears but still finds herself drawn to.

Look at how Pan Yue is lit when shot through Yang Caiwei's subjective point of view. The strong use of light creates a lot of contrast--through her eyes, he is a mixture of light and dark, his morality as inscrutable as his shadowy figure.

Camera Angles and Shot Sizes

The show's use of low angles and close-ups further reinforces the idea that Pan Yue is unpredictable and even dangerous.

In cinematography, low-angle shots tend to make the subject look more powerful and menacing, and the show uses this technique to great effect.

Even in the intimacy of close-up shots, we can sense the threat emanating from Pan Yue. He’s always shot just a smidgeon too close for comfort.

For example, look at how much Liu Xueyi's face fills the frame in an early "romantic" scene. The shot feels almost claustrophobic as if he's so single-minded about his goals that he has no choice but to dominate the frame (and Yang Caiwei). It's an unnerving moment despite the soft words coming out of his mouth.

Side Note: I live for Pan Yue's (vampiric) long shots. The production design team was smart for dressing the character in dark clothes with such a sleek cut and drape--he looks like a sexy bat.

The Nosferatu references in Yang Caiwei's tomb are also perfect.

Composition and Framing

And finally, like any good gothic romance, In Blossom illustrates how love can drive one to despair and even madness.

Because of this, my FAVORITE scene of the show has to be the introduction of Shangguan Zhi. Her obsessive pursuit of beauty in hopes of seducing Pan Yue has left her a shell of a human being, and the scene's composition perfectly encapsulates this with how it focuses on the elegant lines of her body--not her face or personhood.

Shangguan Zhi is trapped by her delusional fantasy of a life with Pan Yue--see how she's boxed in by the vertical lines of the screen panel she admires--and the show regularly uses architectural lines to show how her desperation has trapped Yang Caiwei as well.

[ilovebuckers5]

✧.*Not Friends pt 6*.✧

Paige Bueckers x reader

summary - back to how the both of us always wanted

word count- 1k

themes:

-fluff

-smut

warnings :

-sexual content

A/N - this is super short but I felt like it was an ok way to end this series off. I HOPE YOU LIKE ITTTTT

my eyes refused to peel away from Paige's gaze while her legs were up in the air, her stomach pressed again my bed with her fingers still resting on her computer. I couldn't resist from dropping my purse on the floor, locking the door, and rushing onto the bed, crawling onto Paige's body. it felt like her arms magnetically wrapped around my back. I could feel her smile against my skin while she dug her nose in the crook of my neck. she sat up quickly, readjusting us so that I was sitting on her lap while her legs were spread about the bed. I could tell that she wanted to pull me into a kiss but I stopped her. my hands were on her almost bare shoulders. I took a moment to stare into her eyes. no where else. I felt all the stress that's ever visited my mind slip away. all my brain could comprehend was Paige's eyes. and the way her hands perfectly fit around my hips and the way her index and middle finger gently tilted in the dip between my hips and upper torso. then I would think about how my hands felt around her body. her skin was always warm, even in the winter. she was like the spark of summer I needed when I was freezing. her skin felt so right in my palms. her hair fell around her back and chest and shoulders perfectly. sometimes I just wanted to feel her hair against my bare skin. even when her hair was losing its bright blonde color and her darker roots peaked through, I couldn't get enough of her hair. of course her lips. I could never rip my eyes off of her lips when she wasn't looking and when she was looking. I constantly find myself looking at how her lips turn up when she sees me or one of her teammates. and the way her perfect teeth were on display after a win. her lips were always pink twenty four seven. even if she had just woken up with her hair tangled, eyelashes just slightly stuck together. her lips were always pink as if she just finished putting on lip gloss. her hands were slender. not extremely veining but you could see the definition. the way her hands tense up when shes feeling any emotion deeper than normally sends me over the edge. she looked like a frank ocean song when sleeping. a lana del rey song when talking. daniel caesar when she was happy. bryson tiller when mad. she looked like the perfect song that made me feel like I'm exactly where I'm meant to be.

i felt her hands running across my back and thighs while I was simply encapsulated in her eyes. I didn't even notice how hard I was smiling until I looked back at her entire face and saw how red she was getting. she dipped her head down to cover her reddened cheeks but I quickly used my finger to lift her chin up. I held her jaw gently while leaning in closer and placing multiple pecks on her (yes, still pink) lips. my fingers slowly moved down her neck and chest the more Paige deepened the kiss. her hands were now moving down my hips and onto my ass, I guess this wholesome moment where I'm daydreaming about how perfect her features are is over.

i quickly tore off her tank top along with her bra. without looking, I massaged her tits in both of my hands while she tried to slide of my pants without me lifting myself up. I felt her attempts on my body and pulled my lips and hands away for a split second to take off my shorts and panties. small whines left my throat at my already dripping clit dragged across the sweatpants she was wearing. "fuck Paige." I couldn't contain a single noise I made at this point. Paige quickly stuck her lips against mine again, almost muffling each moan and groan I made. my hands wandered around her stomach and hips, also teasing around the top of her sweatpants and the boxers that peeked through. our pants began to melt with each other as I quicked my pace of grinding against her clothed lap. I couldn't take it, the feeling of emptiness in my pussy. as much as I wanted to grab her hand and fuck myself, I waited for her. eventually, she inserted two of her fingers in my wet hole, not waiting to pump in and out with a fast pace. I felt pathetic how close I already was but to be honest, who gives a fuck?

"s-shit I'm so close p." I pulled away from her lips to whine.

"cmon baby." she spoke back at me.

i began to grind onto her hand at the same place that Paige was moving her fingers. I felt my legs begin to tense up tighter and I kept a stronger grip on her waist. everything felt so right as I came on her fingers. louder moans, almost screams, left my mouth as I repeated Paige's name without caring who could hear. my legs began to shake around her hips along with my fingers. I wanted to keep going but Paige slowly removed her fingers from me. as bad as that felt, I decided to rest my forehead on Paige shoulder. she scooted herself down the bed enough for her head to rest on my pillow. I removed the bottom half of my body from hers and left my head between her shoulder and chest, getting more tired as she held onto my back. her hands were under my shirt, messing around with my bra while I was asleep. the last thing I heard before actually knocking out was Paige's softer voice speaking close to my ear.

"I love you so fucking much."

i cannot believe I even denied the fact that we are not friends. never will be now.

[momentomori24]

I haven't seen anyone talk about it in detail if at all, so I'll just throw this out there: Is it just me, or are Ashley's feelings for Andrew very not romantic?

Just to be very clear-- this isn't me trying to sanitize the incest present in their relationship or twist it into pure unproblematic platonicness despite everything in the game being a hellish, dystopiant, grotesque, unapologetic mess (in a good way), just an observation that's been on my mind for a while.

We know Andrew is absolutely, 100% romantically attracted to his sister especially through both his inner monologues, relationship with Julia and of course, The Scene. But I never really got that same attraction from Ashley. She loves to degree where it can't be considered platonic, but there's a blunt edge to her affection I wouldn't call romantic either.

She's obviously been obsessed with him from a young age as he's the only person she had to cling to without worrying that he'd leave her. She doesn't treat him like a person, she treats him like a coveted toy that only she can play with. Between borderline neglegent parents, untreated apathy issues, a major abandonment complex and a parentified brother/psuedo-dad, unhealthy attachments and toxic tendencies can go real bad real quick. Go figure. It's possessive, referring to her brother as hers and something that's considered stolen the moment someone else has an interest in it, but it feels a lot more "innocent" than Andrew's possessiveness of her. Andrew is hers to have because he's her brother, just like how a plaything would be hers because it was bought for her-- there doesn't seem to be anything more to it than that.

I think the best example of that is their reaction to the Vision in the Burrial route:

Unlike Andrew, who is disturbingly flustered rather than reasonably revolted, she just... doesn't have a reaction to it. They've already trapped themselves in a box with each other and commited some of the worst atrocities imaginable, so she just chalks it up to another thing to add to their crimes list. Her causual playfulness and indifference to the situation is such a strong contrast to Andrew's desperate denial and really shows her feelings about the whole thing. Or lack of, as she isn't at all fazed about it. You'd think that she'd be thrilled, or excited or equally as flustered as Andrew at the thought of their relationship taking the next big step, but there isn't any of that here. Despite her jealousy, obsession, possessiveness and extreme closeness, it doesn't seem that there was ever any romantic intent involved on her end (or at least none that she knows of). Heck, she even voices her confusion when Andrew confesses he read her actions that way:

There is something funny about going through the story thinking ''ok i get it she's the obsessed yandere sister with a brother complex i see you game'' only to be hit with the revelation that it's the complete opposite way around. Basically just Ashley hitting both Andrew AND the players with the "wait you really saw me like that what did i even do to make you think that??" at the very end and it is baffling. The fact that she seems genuinely oblivious to how she comes off is both a little cute and unexpectedly innocent, but also cements just how little she grew up from when she was a kid.

But I think this line from her really encapsulates their relationship perfectly:

One way to keep him around. She won't sleep with him because of some repressed sexual tension or genuine (messed up) affection, but because she views it as transactional. She loves Andy, that version of her brother who went along with whatever she wanted and cared about her despite all her issues when no one else did. She always acts uncaring towards other people, but it's so obvious that she's lonely. That the people she cares about not caring about her has an effect on her. We see it with their mom, the way she continued to call her despite the abuse and neglect she put her through and immediately assumes she wouldn't have wanted them to find her because she feels that unwanted. We see it with her ''friends'', the way she felt so betrayed by how they basically left her for dead in that apartment without bothering to try throwing some food up their balcony. She didn't even care if they would've succeeded or not-- she just wanted someone to try. She clings so viciously to her brother because he's all she has left. She's been labelled unlovable by everyone else in her life, and the moment he leaves her for someone more stable, she's alone for good. Andy needed her the same way she needed him, but now he's gone, and Andrew is more unpredictable than ever. His nightmares have gotten better, so he doesn't need her to sleep easier at night (not that he did in the first place). He's better at having a social life too, so surrounding himself with others and getting his life together shouldn't be too hard. He doesn't need her the way she needs him anymore, but she knows that Andrew wants her, so she'll give herself to him before anyone else can if it means that he'll stay. Which, by the way, is such a good parallel to her mom's own mindset when it comes to relationships (like mother like daughter ammirite). It's so far from love; it's just blatant codependancy she doesn't acknowledge on her end, something we see Andrew both enable and take advantage of whether he realises or not. And I think that's a more nuanced, fascinating trait of her character rather than just the ''yandere sister in love with her brother'' trope.

Anyway, hope you enjoyed reading this messy, hopefully coherent analysis of our gravecest couple, mostly focused on Ashley. And who knows, maybe she IS in love with Andrew and I completely misinterpreted her feelings for him, but until proven otherwise I'll keep clinging to this theory. This GAME THE-- [GUNSHOTS].

[maddithefangirl]

Tears (Azriel x Reader)

Warnings: I was sad while writing this so...

Prompt: “You’re the reason why I believe in love, you know?”

a/n: This is therapeutic for me to write so I don't really care how bad it is lol. I wasn't able to write any of the sequels I've been working on but I was able to write this so here you go!!

｡☆✼★━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━★✼☆｡

The tears would not stop flowing. Today was the anniversary of the day that you left the Hewn City and fled to Velaris as a refugee. Also, the last time you would ever see your mother. You loved your mother more than anything in the entire world, but she hadn’t shown you that same love back. She was a kind female, but she expected the world out of you. That wasn’t always possible, so when she took out that anger on you, you fled. 

It was a spring day with a light breeze seeping through the windows. You lay on the lounge chair with a book opened in your hand, but you couldn’t bring yourself to read it. Your mind had left you long ago and then the tears started to fall. You didn’t even know why you were crying. Was it because you missed her? Maybe, but she wasn’t good to you so why should you miss her? What really was happening was you were grieving that old life you used to have. 

Hours passed and yet you remained, frozen. 

As you sat in your chair staring out the nearest window, the door opened and closed. Unbeknownst to you, your love was searching for you throughout the townhouse you shared. He had been one of the first people you met when you finally made it to Velaris. He had held you for questioning for days before deciding you were not a threat to then give you living quarters in the shabbier places in the city. 

He couldn’t stop thinking about you after that, so he came to check up on you monthly always with a bouquet of flowers in his hands. Usually yellow tulips until one day he showed up with red roses and asked you on a date. 

Since then, the mating bond had snapped into place and you accepted it with no hesitation. It was like he was the one who personally saved you from the Hewn City. 

Now, he stood in front of the doorway staring at you trying to access the scene before him. He saw you on the lounge chair with the book in your hand long forgotten. He could have sworn you were a statue with how still you were until he heard a sniffle. That got his senses on alert. 

“My love,” he spoke softly as he rushed to your side. 

You were unchanged as you continued to stare out the window. All that could be heard was a choked sob that wracked your system. The dam had broken with his presence. He grabbed your jaw and brought his eyes to yours. 

He sighed, “my love… what is it?”

You did nothing but cry and hugged him. Tears found home in his tunic as you rested your head on his shoulder. He was everything to you. That ache in your heart that your mother had left you was perfectly filled with him, your love, Azriel. His wings encapsulated the both of you together in time. This is what you needed in this moment. A hug from the person who loves you the most in the world and accepted you for who you were. Someone who wanted to be there for you. He was so incredibly special to you, and nobody could take that away from you. 

After a while, the tears stopped and you were finally able to look up into his eyes. You felt all of his love seep into you all at once. All you managed to say was, “You’re the reason why I believe in love, you know?” 

He smiled. There was nothing stopping the unconditional love that he felt for you. He knew your past and knew what wounds your mother left on your heart, but he was going to be there for you. Always.

[the-ninjago-historian]

Ninjago Remastered Designs!

THEY'RE DONE! After months of work!!! They are DOOOOOOOOOOONE. WOOOOOOOOOOO! Lol! Welp, these are my Ninjago designs! Basically, this is my take on the Ninja if they were in a 2d animated cartoon! And yes! I will be drawing more characters. Tumblr butchered the quality, so close ups and design notes are below the cut. They're pretty detailed, so I highly recommend checking them out. Feel free to ask questions about the designs! ⬇️⬇️⬇️ - ✒️🐉

When designing these outfits, I tried to take inspiration from the ones in the show. And in terms of art style, drew inspiration from early 2000s cartoons, (Action Adventure ones specifically,) Anime inspired shows, and even a hint of traditional Disney animation. And while I designed them with a 2d cartoon in mind, most of the designs would most likely have to be simplified for them to be used in animation. So let's get started!

Kai: Kai was a pretty fun to work with. I actually didn't plan on giving him a sleeveless outfit. But it happened! And I like it! If you'll notice, the flame pattern on his vest mirrors the pattern on his sister Nya's outfit. I thought that would be a cool detail to include. It was inspired by their March of The Oni outfits. I also made sure to include his scar and bandaid. And gave him reddish brown eyes to signify his elemental power. Him and sister I imagine being Brazilian/Taiwanese. So I hope I captured their ethnicity properly. I'm pretty happy with this design. Especially his hair, which was hard to replicate.

Jay: Jay was a hard one for sure. I wasn't too sure how to vamp up his outfit. So I started by giving him some lightning patterns on his Gi. (At least I think that's what it's called?) And I decided to make it look a little baggy and soft. It just seemed to suit him. I tried something a little more form fitting and didn't look right. Also! A fun detail I included was his half the Yin Yang pendent around his neck! And of course Nya has her half. I imagine him having Irish ancestry, so I gave him pale, freckled skin. And gorgeous curly red hair. (As a fellow red head, I'm very proud.) Overall, I think he turned out pretty adorable. And his face is spot on.

Nya: Nya I pretty much got right on the first try! I just had a really clear vision of her in my head. I gave her a grey outfit with bright, vibrant blue details. The pattern on her Gi is inspired by Koi Scales. And she has her half of the Yin Yang pendent around her neck. I really like this one, because while it is simple, it's beautiful. And I think it reflects her element nicely. The only thing I missed was to give her a symbol like the rest. But overall, I love it! One more thing is that I wanted to give her and Pixal different hair. So when I finally release my Pixal design, you'll see that while they both have ponytails, I gave them different cut and styled ones. Should be neat!

Zane: Zane was the first one of the Ninjas I redesigned! I love how he turned out. I tried to give him a splintered ice effect on his outfit inspired by his Core minifigure and gave him his faithful falcon companion. Falcon has his old greyish purple feathers, but blue icy eyes to match his owner. I also wanted to give Zane flowing sleeves, that would look very majestic waving about in a blizzard wind. He is also incredibly tall. Taller than Cole even! I was inspired by the giant humanoid robots I'd seen in movies. In his cloaking disguise, I imagine him looking German. With blond hair, blue eyes, and light skin. I also like to think Dr Julian was German. (Was this influenced by my German ancestry? Who knows?)

Cole: You would not believe how many times I had to redraw this man's face. Haha! I just could find that sweet spot! That face that perfectly encapsulated his strong, but gentle personality. But I think I did it! His outfit is based on his Oni Trilogy Gi, with orange detailing. And he has his Island ponytail and bandana. I absolutely loved that hair style on him. So I had to use it! And if you'll notice, he has a beautiful tattoo on his right arm, with his symbol in the center. I imagine him being half Maori, from his mother's side. And the tattoo was inspired by Maori tattoos I saw pictures of. I'm not too sure how accurate those images were. But hopefully I hit the mark.

Lloyd: Finally! Our green Ninja Lloyd! His outfit was inspired by two things. Dragons, and his outfit from the Secrets of Forbidden Spinjitsu seasons. I gave him a beautiful golden dragon and cloud pattern on his clothes, a leather arm guard, and shoulder pads. If you look closer, you'll also see he has cat-like dragon eyes which pays homage to his dragon and Oni heritage. I like to think that depending on his emotions, his eyes will go from slits, to big and wide. So they are good indicators for his mood. I also imagine him being Japanese. But his powers give him his classic blond hair and green eyes. I'm very happy with this design. His hair, eyes, and face all look exactly how I see him in my head.

Well, that's all. I hope you enjoyed these designs and notes! I assure you, you will see more of the them.

Bye! - ✒️🐉

[leejenowrld]

I HAVE QUESTIONS!!!

for yn and jeno

- what songs do you dedicate to each other? like what songs do you think of when you think of the other?

- is there anything you regret (sexually?)

- how does it feel when you see the other upset and mad?

- do you get along with each others friends?

- who’s louder in bed?

- jeno, what’s your opinion on what seoyeon did to yn that one time?

-

<3333 i love this

what songs do you dedicate to each other?

yn - i love you by little mix. it’s a strong love ballad. i really resonate with the lyrics. it’s emotional, it’s powerful, it makes me happy, it makes me cry, it gives me life. the song perfectly encapsulates what it’s like to love lee jeno and what it feels like to be loved by him

jeno - here with me by dVvd, i don’t care what happens in my life, as long as i’m with yn then it’s all that matters. i just want her by my side, with me. we belong with each other.

(jeno) nothing on you by bruno mars, i wanna be yours, moments by one direction,

(yn) pretty boy the neighbourhood, style by taylor swift, glue song by beabadoobaee

is there anything you regret sexually?

yn - hm, i mean, not really? we always have fun and we always talk about what we should explore/what we liked and what we didn’t really like.

jeno - fuck no.

how does it feel when you see the other upset/mad?

yn - jeno gets upset very rarely. i’ve seen him cry like 3 times in the years we’ve been together. and each time killed me. if i think about it now then i will sob. you know that something hits jeno hard when it causes him to cry. all i could do was comfort him and hold him as he sobbed into my shoulder :( he cried himself to sleep all three times. i tried to hide my tears from him and not show him that i was getting upset but we ended up crying to each other all 3 times :( i want nothing in the world to ever hurt my man. like i will become violent at anyone or anything that makes him feel that way

and when he’s mad? oh he gets mad a lot. it’s not that difficult to calm him down for me, i’ve become quite good at it. i sit attentively and listen to him as he lets it out and then i actively calm him down, kisses on his temple, holding his hands, rubbing his shoulder, rubbing his cheek with my thumb, whispering softly to him. it’s all the small things that calms him down. he becomes very overwhelmed with anger and it’s gotten him into many fights, verbal and physical. he isn’t afraid to defend what’s right and that’s what i love about him, his priorities are so strong <3 there hasn’t been a time where he’s been in the wrong or he’s picked a fight for the wrong reasons. he doesn’t ever pick them. he’s mature.

jeno - yn gets quite sad and emotional, she probably cries in my arms every week and it hurts me every single time. she’s very sensitive and i don’t wanna call my girl weak but she takes a lot of things to heart, she feels everything and she feels it a lot. she can’t deal well with confrontation or any sign of misunderstandings and she just bursts open in my arms and lets everything out :( when she’s upset she begins hyperventilating and sobbing really loudly, she can’t get her words out and she shakes. so the first thing i do is drop everything for her and just hold her, put her in my arms, massage her hair, kiss her forehead, look into her eyes and whisper sweet things to her. i just wait for her to calm down before we start talking. it takes a while sometimes, sometimes she’s able to recover quickly. whichever one it is, i’m always so proud of her. she’s so strong. we always talk about what’s on her mind and what’s made her upset and i try my best to guide her through it and help her on what she has to do, i try to give her good advice. i’m so endlessly proud of her. she just has a big heart and gets overwhelmed a lot. i wish i could take away her pain.

jeno - my girlfriend doesn’t get mad, she has so much patience, more patience than i will ever have. but she can get snappy when she’s stressed and under high pressure. it’s okay though, it’s nothing serious. 9/10 she will always come into my arms and kiss me all over my face and apologise for being snappy with me

do you get along with each others friends?

yn - yeah! i love them. at first i was really shy and they all probably thought i was anti social. i’m sure they wasn’t too keen on me but i hope i’ve changed their minds :) they’re chill and good company, they make jeno happy and that’s all that matters. they’re incredibly caring and protective too. i’m someone who gets suffocated in the presence of others but none of jenos friends make me feel that way :)

jeno - yn has like… maybe three friends and one of them is me 😭 i’m joking. yn’s main friend is heejin and i do love her. mainly after seeing how good of a friend she is to yn. she always protects and defends her and she makes my girlfriend happy. yn has a habit of not defending herself, she lets people shit on her and treat her like crap but heejin always fights for her and it warms my heart. she fights back to all the girls who are so unnecessarily rude and bitchy to yn. once she punched seoyeon in the face and wow… i’m glad because she does things that i can’t do

who’s louder in bed?

yn - definitely jeno

jeno - what the fuck? it’s you

yn - [shakes her head] jeno doesn’t try to be quiet. he wants everyone to hear. it’s a kink i think. he says the dirtiest of things at the top of his lungs

jeno - it’s 100% yn. she will scream at the top of her lungs all night long. she will scream daddy, baby and jeno the most. even when she’s tired and so fucked out of her mind she still forces herself to have the energy to scream one more ‘JENO’ or ‘DADDY!!’

yn - he doesn’t care who hears or sees him, that’s why he always fucks me in the living room or in public, he wants people to see.

jeno - says the girl who rode my dick on the train home

yn - there was like one other person in the carriage and she was old and blind anyways!

jeno - well she wasn’t death, she could hear you moaning ‘daddy’

[hail-brod]

A Chance and Beyond (1)

Next chapter: (Chapter 2)

Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Loki x FReader

Set after the events of Thor: Ragnarok and begins with Infinity War when the spaceship containing Thor and the other Asgardians were spared from the supposed attack of Thanos. Meaning, Loki is alive. But the threat still looms.

(Also, let's just pretend Hela didn't destroy Mjollnir :DD)

Spoilers for Loki season 2!

Warning/s: Just some cursing

WC: 3.3k

When you realized that your existence is in great trouble, you do your best to find a way to get back to where you were previously encapsulated as a time criminal. After all, they're the reason why you're fucked. But, seems like you'll be needing the Avengers' help first. And Loki's.

"What the fuck."

Was all Tony Stark could managed to say after being abruptly interrupted by a terrifyingly distorted figure appearing right in front of him, evidently disrupting the banter he was having with the so-called God of Mischief, Loki. The other avengers surrounding the two men were no different, frozen on their spot as they gather round in the sophisticated compound, loss for words at the woman who happens to appear uninvited.

You stood there breathless.

Without any second thoughts, they made their move directing a fighting stance at you, as if expecting a sudden attack. Just what you'd expect from the Earth's mightiest heroes.

Minus Loki.

Though, not without a hint of confusion delighting their faces.

After you had successful regain your balance, although still dreading the feeling of being ripped apart through time, you slowly flayed your hands up in defeat. Panting, you surveyed around.

You were in the Avengers' compound.

"What...in the hell was that?" the one who seemed to have said that was actually the only one hesitant to attack you, knuckles upfront him with an obvious unsureness as his eyes warily scanned you. Gaping, he continued. "Did I...Did I hallucinate that or...? Oh, god, am I going mad?"

"I don't believe that is the case here, Banner." boomed Thor, holding out Mjollnir threateningly. Eyes stern at your panting form.

Alright, how fortunate to see a very familiar face.

"I hope so. Or else, I might as well decide that being on a whole different planet for a whole year and being part of a godly family crisis has already altered my mind in many different ways."

"Bruce, calm down." a bearded blonde man with a shield said. Steve Rogers. You recall. "Just be thankful that isn't the case here because it certainly isn't."

You wish you could snort at the exchange but you have other matters to focus on at the moment. Though, you held Banner's terrified gaze with a wary of your own as you think for a moment who Banner is but you brush it aside.

You can't afford to dilly-dally with such questions and just preferably, avoid starting a needless fight.

With Stark now a few steps back from you, hands enclosed in his iron red gauntlet with the center of his palm alight, he eyed you suspiciously. He pointed at you, threatening to blast you on your spot. Not even sliding the chance to put out a snarky comment. "I don't know about that Cap. I think we've all gone mad."

"Shut it, Tony." the blondied woman in a black armored and leather suit remarked, eyeing the freaked out Banner. "Now's not the time."

He only gave her a stern look before returning it back to you, although not without muttering something under his breath. You can almost make out the mocking smile he had before seriously staring you down.

That's also when you perfectly noticed the raven haired God at your other side. Just like Stark, he was a few steps away. Your hands were still in the air as you didn't waste a second to slowly shift your eyes to the God who you we're just with a few hours ago.

Technically, it isn't him and also, you're not even certain if that was a few hours ago. TVA has victoriously displaced your sense of time and you have no choice but to set that aside for now.

First and foremost, let's not die in the hands of these worldly — and otherworldly — renowned superhuman Midgardian people.

"That was no sorcery." was all Loki could utter, blaring a suspicious glare at you. At this point, you can say that everyone here is glaring daggers at you with so much suspicion after just witnessing you appear uncannily right in front of their eyes. Loki's trusty daggers points at you with such intensity that you can't help but freeze on your spot entirely. You garner that moving further might just cause him to pounce on you and successfully cut your throat out.

Such a Loki trait. You consciously note. At the same time, it pricks a sense of oddness to you.

"For once, I can agree with you." this time, it was the man in a red cape. His hands projecting a some sort of fiery circular engravings — Or markings, it seems — that you were not familiar with. Although, it did felt familiar. "Who are you and why have you come here?"

Finally asking the right questions, everyone else anticipated your response.

"I'd really thought you'd ask how I did get here but, fine." your attempt at settling everything down with a little humor earned nothing. You only strained a smile. "You can put your guard down now. I doubt I can even inflict damage to any of you when I am outnumbered, don't you think?" You say with a nervous shrug.

"Wait.." Thor started. "You are an Asgardian."

Ah.

"Wait, what now?" a conflicted Banner turned to him with a frown. "Where did that come from?"

"Her clothing." it was Loki. Tilting his head, he slightly squinted at you. You can already feel their movements break from their stance but nonetheless, was still on guard. "But I wouldn't want to jump to conclusions if I were you, brother. A lie or two is easy to miss." he says that in a lowered and slick tone, eyes prying deep in your existence.

"Good preach, God of Lies, but why don't you myth brothers figure something out if she'll massacre us or join the party. Is that good or is that impossible?" Stark commands.

"That's-" Thor tries to say.

"I can do that." Oh no.

Without hesitation, Loki readies to attack you with a knowing smirk. You want to say that you expected that but in terms of fighting physically between you and him, he always precedes. Except when it comes to sorcery.

Yet, his daggers haven't spelt your doom when suddenly, you fell.

You fell and landed in a bright room enclosed with the very bright color of white. Norns, help me. At this point, I'm not even surprised if Midgardian structures could be capable of blinding me. Humans and their taste in design.

Before you could jump to assumptions whether you time-slipped again, you heard the sound of sizzling above you as you turn to look only to see a yellow ring close.

Oh. You thought. Of course. How can I forget that doctor wizard and his parlor tricks? I can do better than that.

But before you could prove it to no one in particular by trying to dematerialize a wall for your way out, which you expected to be unbreakable because, well, this is the Avengers' territory — you felt the familiar twist of your body as you closed your eyes, getting ready for what's to come. You're time-slipping. Again.

When you opened your eyes, you don't know if you should be relieved or not because you were still in the same spot.

I am seriously starting to despise this more than anything. You say in your mind, cranking your head in pain.

As if the universe has heard your impulsive thoughts for wanting to pride yourself as the better sorcerer, one episode of time-slipping has managed to avert your thoughts to a different one. There's really no point in trying to escape when you'll be thrown off eventually to a different timeline thus, relieving you off of this situation. At least you hope you'll have that kind of luck, considering that you're here imprisoned and untrusted by heroes. For the meantime, you painfully have a lot of questions.

The fact that you are time-slipping outside of TVA is making you feel wary and disoriented.

Not just that, because you're not being tossed around through time in one place like before in TVA, but because you're being tossed around in different branches of time. You can't help but overthink, a blooming panic erupts in you. If what you heard from Ouroboros was true, about the possibility of being lost to time, then maybe you can consider that that's what's occurring to you. Adding to that, how can Loki and the others track you when there's a number of branches exceeding spontaneously and you're amongst one of them — inconsistently appearing through one branch after another.

To hell with this time-slipping phenomenon.

Such thoughts have managed to waver your poised will. You don't want this. After everything that's happened, you're now overwhelmed by incomparable fear, enough to cover the pang of grief that you successfully tried to keep a hold off during the dangers you have encountered. And that causes you to resume the fear of losing something again. If before you've lost the right to exist in your own timeline, then now seems like you're losing more than you could think of.

A chance. The chance to only exist without the burden of being a criminal to time.

The Loki you met ensured you that. And you're scared to lose the hope you unconsciously held so close that he had given you.

You're scared that you're bound to be stuck in time, alone and nowhere to belong to.

You're just a displaced speck of entity in the vast timelines of universes, an error meant to be rid of.

Is this truly the ending that you deserve?

Just lost to time. For eternity.

After everything that you've been through, you think of the fact that your Nexus event was a fickle thing in the grand scheme of things. A mere sentiment, and now it's a fault that you apparently cannot undo.

Would you have regret it?

Ah. You think. That's the problem,

I don't.

For the love of Buri, what is happening?

You have already time-slipped thrice in a row now, and you're still where you stood afoot a few minutes ago.

You hitched your breathing as you relished the acquainted feeling of distortion, you exhaled in distraught. Your mind trying to run a million miles per second thinking of an explanation on the same bloody concept of time as well as your timely old friend, time-slipping. Marvelous.

But before you could sit down and relax on the cushions edging on two sides of the opposite walls which levels above your knee, you caught in the corner of your eye the wall you tried to dematerialize earlier; now fading from white to being transparent like glass.

And behind the glass wall stood your captors.

You tried to ground yourself with the wall beside you, but you pushed your body to the side so that you can at least have the decency to look like you aren't struggling so much. Because you definitely aren't.

"Good catch." remarked Stark. "We have so much going on today with Earth being threatened by a goofy alien that's apparently so much more dangerous than we could know — and now, you add more questions and trouble to that just for appearing out of nowhere like a grated spaghetti."

You almost missed the way the blonde woman rolled her eyes at Stark's words but nonetheless, you focus on what he said.

Earth being threatened by an alien.

"Do you mean to say... Thanos?" you ask. Doubtlessly aware of his feats and reputation in your timeline. Their heads perked up at the mention of the said Titan.

"You know of him?" quite surprised at the familiar voice, you turn to look at Thor.

Parting your lips with slight hesitation, you reply. "No. No, I do not. At least, not personally. He is called the Mad Titan, a galactic conqueror. Tis but a.... common knowledge where I come from."

"Which is Asgard, is it not?" Loki tauntingly says.

Oh, well.

He eyes you in victory for having caught your lie and the foolish words you had unintentionally slip. But he continued. "Or perhaps, my brother and I are mistaken to assume that you are a kin of our people. As well as considering that of your knowledge of this Mad Titan, you seem to know more than just that." you slightly stiffened, noting the lofty tone he had, slowly strutting his way forward with his hands tucked behind him. "Keep hiding your secrets but your eventual lies will get you nowhere when I'm here, imposter."

"Brother..."

"No, no, let him. It's great that we have a lie-detector in the team." Stark muses, earning an unamused head shake from Rogers.

Your gaze lingers a tad bit longer than you intended to at the raven-head, deciding whether you should even admit your unruly situation to them and potentially double their troubles a hundredfold by stating that their lives are also in danger from a timeless phenomenon and being at risk for the possible collapse of their existence altogether.

Probably not a good idea.

Moreover, you don't want to let yourself fall in the luxury of pitting yourself with fellow Asgardians and perhaps attain the old life you had when you woefully know that you have no place in any kind of reality no more. Your heart clenches at that.

But how can you possibly deny your origin and the non-sorcery distortion materialization, also called—

Your body aches and twists as you grit your teeth, shutting your eyes and reliving the ripping portion of this damned time-slip. As it ended, your breath wavers as you pant, shoulders crooked at the fleeting sensation it brought. Expecting that maybe you have been transported to another timeline, you peek one eye out.

You see the same faces and surroundings except this time, their reaction contorts to a series of pained and horrified expressions. Even Loki looked uneasy.

You exhale. "Pardon me, that must've been very unsightly." you eventually say.

"That just happened again." Banner gawks.

"Are you alright?" a stern voice asks. You turn to meet the concerned eyes of Rogers. "I assume that doesn't happen normally. Not even for Asgardians." you caught the quick glance he gave at Thor before focusing back on you.

You reply, nodding. "No, no, you're right. This is no common occurrence amongst the people of Asgard. It is simply just.... " you puff your body back up in a poised posture. "No, not simply." you let out a strained chuckle, confliction can be traced on your face. "To be painfully honest and blunt, I am lost through time and I haven't got a clue on what exactly I shall plan to do in these circumstances. Although indeed, I am an Asgardian but, from a different...let's say, reality. So rest assured because I don't plan on harming heroes I've accompanied in battle."

You were ready to receive their doubtful phrases and looks, but the sorcerer who brought you in this cage steps forward. Almost like he disapproved everything you had just mentioned.

"Time-travelling is not something to be tampered with. Unless, you're adept at the arts of time sorcery, and to be able to manipulate it without damaging our reality is rather a big feat for a sorcerer." he explains. This time, he frowns at you. "But no. Whatever's happening to you, it doesn't feel like magic."

You take in his words, holding his unrelenting stare. "You're right..."

You know Doctor Strange and his capabilities as the Sorcerer Supreme, and as you thought of the fact that he also possesses the Time Stone, maybe you can do something with his help.

Even though you know the chances of successfully using magic against a complication from TVA is way below the odds, you'd wager.

He raises a brow but before he could add more, you spoke. "Time-slipping." you pause, scanning his expression, hoping that maybe someone who knows so much about the expertise of time in terms of magic could help you discover your way back to TVA. Though, his face doesn't show any hint of knowing so you pushed further. "I've been repeatedly tossed around multiple branches of time against my will, but not because I time-traveled. For now all I can say is, I am stuck here in your reality and, well... with a distorting body."

"Great. Sure. Magic and sorcerers exist, even Gods, so why the hell would I not believe anything about time-traveling now? Tell me, Doc, is she making any sense to you?" Stark walks towards the said wizard. You slightly frowned at the tone he used. If this is how Tony Stark reacts to someone he doesn't trust just like how a particular individual mentioned to you, then you're glad that the Stark that you know favored you well.

Not that it matters anymore.

"I've never heard anything about that kind of problem. Especially now you do confirm it doesn't root from magic." the Doctor answers.

Stark hefts up his hands, looking around at everyone else, as if showing that his point has just been proven.

But from the corner of your eye, you noticed the way Loki haughtily rolls his eyes with a sigh and you perfectly know what irked him at that moment.

"As if a second-rate sorcerer could know anything more beyond the complexion of sorcery and time."

The only woman other than you sighs in slight frustration. "Oh, no. Someone please stop him."

If you weren't in a tight spot, you could've laughed at her compliant. Although, that earned her a glare from the trickster with crossed arms. For once in a while, it's nice to see Loki act so indifferently.

Strange only gave the God a pointed look before resting his eyes back on you. "Okay. If what you say is true, time-slipping as you would call it and to consider there's no magic tapping into this, what exactly do you plan on doing now?"

There it is. "I need your help."

"Are you shitting me right now?" Stark loops in.

"Even if with just your help, Doctor Strange. Please." you plead, firmly stepping closer to the glass barrier.

"How can you assure you're not just after something from us, specifically from him." Loki tips his head in Strange's direction. You know well that he caught unto your intentions as he spares a quick glance at the necklace of the said wizard.

Cocky snake.

At that, everyone stares at you sharply that if looks could kill, you'd be a dead corpse that has been stabbed with various types of weaponry magnificently forged by dwarves.

"You're not entirely wrong if you think that I'm after the Time Stone but for argument's sake, there is a reason why it is called the Time Stone." you explain, trying not to waver for being the receiving end to their eventual wrath. For a second, you thought you'd gain another yet of Loki's condescending retortions, but you're surprised that he only eyed you down impassively. Observing you.

Banner joins in. "If you admit it and put it like that then, I don't even know if you're lying or not anymore." he sits down on one of the metallic chairs by the semi-circular machinery in the middle of the room. "Even though that last part sounded dumb for an excuse; which is exactly why I'm having second thoughts."

"That's... I appreciate that — I think." you say, slightly frowning. It is dumb. You don't blame him though.

He gives you a tight-lipped smile which disappears immediately. "Yeah, no, it's fine."

Stark looks at him incredulously, as if he truly felt betrayed. "Bruce, what the hell?"

The others quirk confusingly at the exchange before you spoke again. "But to be clear again, that wasn't an excuse. Not for deception, at least."

It actually didn't sit quite well with you that the one who usually loves to deceive is standing idly in silence when you mentioned his expertise.

But you know that calculating gaze of his.

"Fine." you bat an eye at the person who spoke. "But you are to be restrained until we deem you trustworthy. One wrong step and you might just end up somewhere other than a cell."

A weight lifts up from your chest, somehow. You eye Strange in relief, almost a hint of exhaustion engulfs your expression but you blink it away. "I am grate-"

Your body contorts and twists once again.

Next chapter: (Chapter 2)

Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Ko-fi?

[pettyprocrastination]

Hi!! How are you?

I would also love to hear/read more about Tess x Joel x reader!! ❤️❤️

im great!! I hope you are doing well too darling <3

___________

For the longest time, you think Tess and Joel are married. It's an honest mistake, really. Seeing the way they work together like a well-oiled machine and have done so for years leads you to think there's more to their relationship.

Which there is. But neither of them will admit it.

Tess is easier to talk to. Not to say she isn't scary as well because christ, you know the things she's capable of and make sure to never short her on a trade or a cut of the profits, but its different. She speaks. Even as she's looking over the haul from your last run to make sure you aren't skimping her out, she talks to you. Little jokes injected into every few sentences while looking over stock, the occasional remark in awe of "you were able to find this?" that filled you with pride each time in that raspy voice that kept you up at night.

Joel is silent.

He sits in the room and watches. Rarely uttering a word unless its to shoot down an idea for your next run because "FEDRA is getting antsy, unless you want to be on the execution list tomorrow I suggest you wait a few days." or to raise his nose at the oddities you've collected.

Like a proper guard dog, he watches and waits for a command.

The first time you speak to him alone, without Tess, is when it happens.

You had just told him that you were planning another run for tomorrow after making connections with another smuggler who wanted to meet. But the location was at least a two days walk from the QZ.

"You can't possibly be that stupid."

"Excuse me?"

His eyes narrow and he leans in. On instinct you shrink back and curse at yourself for doing so.

"You plan on meetin' somebody you've never worked with before and never seen in person, alone because of what? Blind trust?"

"Because of profit."

He snorts. "Yeah well somethin' tells me 'mutual profit' isn't what he has in mind. The answer is no." Your face grows hot under his criticism, his patronizing fucking voice and that stupid southern accent to the point where you grab at his shoulder when he turns away from you.

"I wasn't asking for permission, man. I was telling you. Just make sure that your wife knows I'm-"

There.

His head snaps back as if you had slapped him, staring at you with in shock before his eyes narrow into slits.

"What did you just say?"

His voice rumbles a low, warning timbre that makes your hands begins to shake despite your intentions of looking strong.

"I said-" the room suddenly feels smaller. Corners all too tight and the door too far for your liking because its hitting you know that youre alone with him and just how many times Tess has sent this man out to break some bones on her accord without a second word of it.

"I said." Your throat tightens and you force the words out. "I said to tell your wife-"

"She isn't my wife."

Oh.

"Oh!"

Joel shakes his head. His face scrunches up and shoulders pull in, you realize then that he isn't angry.

He's uncomfortable.

"Oh, I uh. Didn't know." The floorboards groan beneath you as you shift your weight from one foot to the other. "I just assumed that-"

"Well we aren't, alright?" He holds out a hand to stop your further explanation but it does nothing to hide the red tint creeping up his neck and ears. "She's just my-"

His voice fails him as he struggles to find the words to properly explain just what Tess is to him and him to her. The silence becomes all too consuming as he makes a vague gesture in the air. Flitting his fingers and waving his hand up and down in a way that perfectly encapsulates just how fucking complicated it is.

"I understand."

The situation has gone from terrifying to awkward so fast you could have laughed as you now try to soothe the nerves of the same man you worried was ten seconds away from snapping your wrist like a twig. "It's none of my business, really. Just-" You turn on your heel and cringe.

You'd rather him just break your wrist, honestly.

"Let Tess know when I'm leaving for the run, okay?"

"Push it back a week and we'll join you."

Your hands freezes, hovering over the doorknob and you look over your shoulder. Joel stands behind you, face in his hands.

"I'm sorry?"

He takes a deep breathe and looks at you with tired eyes. "If you can contact your man and get him to push the meeting by a week, Tess and I will go with you, alright? You need to have somebody there with you in case something happens."

He takes a step forward, broad shoulders boxing you in and he leans over and opens the door for you.

"Besides, you're the only one in the QZ who specializes in weird shit." Joel pulls back sighs. "Tess wants to keep the connection."

You don't bother hiding your smile from him.

"I prefer the term oddities." "Yeah? Well, I prefer the term headaches. Now fuck off so I can go talk to her."

Joel watches your form dash down the hall and disappear from his sight. He pinches the bridge of his nose and groans. His thoughts wander to you, then Tess.

Then you and Tess.

"Fuckin' moron."

[tobiasdrake]

One down, two to find. Let's see what else we can poke.

...that....

...that feels like an awfully big thing to ask of me. I don't know if I'm ready for that kind of a commitment.

...

I am so intimidated by this pretty flower right now. Um? UMMMM!?

HERE TEAM LEADER YOU ARE AN AWESOME TEAM LEADER PLEASE TAKE THIS AWAY FROM ME AND DON'T READ ANYTHING INTO THIS.

I AM NOT QUALIFIED TO TAKE ON SUCH A HEAVY RESPONSIBILITY AS THIS.

GREAT. DO THAT. AND LET US NEVER SPEAK OF THIS AGAIN GOODBYE.

Felt tho.

This sign perfectly encapsulates my feelings for the intense Flower Mission I just had to undergo.

There they are. Hey there, Bon-bon, what's on your mind?

Whoa! Hostile. Guess you're not holding up so well, huh?

Yep, that explains the dourness.

Look, Bonnie, I'm not going to give you some platitudes about embracing Change even when it hurts or whatever. That's Mira's job. I think. I still don't fully understand the particular creeds of our religion.

What I am going to tell you is that you aren't wrong for feeling it. These feelings you're experiencing are entirely valid. I want you to open yourself up and let yourself process them.

Carry them with you. And then, tomorrow, I want you to take those feelings and turn them into violence. I'm not going to tell you that it will be okay. I'm going to tell you that the hurricane of violence we unleash tomorrow is how we make it okay.

This is a child terrified for an imperiled loved one. I don't know why I even asked. They obviously have only one thing on their mind right now.

Yep. Hostile. Okay, so my takeaway from this conversation is that Bonnie is going through a lot and seems nice enough to the people they like, but absolutely hates my guts for some reason.

Okay, one left. That just leaves the Favor Tree.

HEY THERE BIZZA-ZISS... Busy....

Hey Isa, how's your favor coming along?

If you can't think of a favor to ask, you could ask it for some kind of imprint of the tree itself that you can take with you. Then you'll always be able to remember how cool it is.

...

OOH OOH, I should ask the Favor Tree for little statuettes of my face that I can hand out to people. Same reason.

Oh. It doesn't grant wishes or anything? That's disappointing.

Hold on, let me jot this down in my Pocket Notes. "Followers of Change pray to large nearby flora instead of their deity." Got it. I am suddenly much less enthused about the Favor Tree.

Sure, that passes muster. Cool. Cool-cool-cool.

Honestly, I've heard worse superstitions. Even if it doesn't work, offering prayers to a nearby tree is pretty harmless. I'm not going to be mean about it.

Honestly, you should. Your whole aesthetic is working for you. I particularly like the way your earrings hang down low enough to reach the rise of your turtleneck collar to create the impression of a smooth continuation.

The matching nail polish helps, too. I realize we're very limited in our available color palettes but you've got just the right amount of contrast to bring the whole look together. I think you're going to go far.

Oh, we have a habit of doing this? Cool, that makes me feel much more comfortable with it. Don't know why Croc Lady made a fuss if Isa and I are already used to being bunkmates. Maybe she's weirded out by platonic male intimacy.

Hang on a second, let me jot that down on her Pocket Note.

"Possibly Toxic???"

There we go. All set.

[guillotinebypierre]

-Continuation of last post-

"How far away is your hotel ?", Soyeon asked

Her tone didn't indicate any emotion yet her eyes were sultry and practically screamed at Y/n to hurry the fuck up and get them to his room.

"About a 15 minute drive, 10 if we're lucky with traffic.", he replied before starting the engine and driving off.

"Good, then please focus on the road and don't mind me", Soyeon said before reaching over and unbuckling Y/n's belt.

She got to work quickly, not even giving the man time to respond before taking his cock out and shoving it deep into her throat. Her throat was warm and as tight as her body looked to be. Y/n felt the muscles contracting around his dick, feeling every crevice of her. Focussing on the street was becoming harder and harder, creating the objective in Y/n's mind to just get to his hotel as quickly as possible.

The interior of the expensive car was filled with gagging and slurping, indicative of Soyeon giving so much effort that Y/n was sure he'd have to get his pants cleaned after this. Stoping at a red light gave Y/n the little breathing space he needed as he threw his head back and grabbed a fistful of the hair of the woman in front of him. He guided her head even further down his cock, making her nose touch his base, holding her there for a few seconds before helping her come up again. He looked over at the rapper, seeing her hungry eyes look back at him. The moonlight illuminated her gorgeous face, her plump lips with her now smeared red lipstick. Her chin which was coated with saliva and precum. Her perfect eyebrows, her black eyeshadow that perfectly encapsulated Soyeon's energy, almost giving her this dominant and bossy esque aura that also matched her hair. Everything about her was perfect- so perfect in fact that Y/n slowly leaned over, wanting to kiss her until-

*BEEP*

Y/n remembered that they were still on the street and pressed into the gas pedal.

"You looked like you fell in love for a second Y/nn", Soyeon said while chuckling.

"Was my head that good ? Because if that's all it took for you to fall in love I think I'll be leaving your hotel room with a ring on my finger", she continued before reaching over and stroking your chest.

She used one hand and slowly touched along your jawline while using her other hand to slowly stroke you, using the saliva and precum that coated you from shaft to tip as lubrication. Her long fingers barely reached around him but she went at it nonetheless. She reached over and started whispering in his ear.

"I bet this feels amazing, doesn't it baby ? It feels much better than whatever Jennie did to you, right. I can feel you throbbing in my hand, you're body is practically begging to release all over my fingers.

Y/nn I'm so wet right now you can't even imagine baby. I can't wait for us to get to your room so you can fuck me all the way into the morning. "

Her words sent shivers done his spine and his erection only grew bigger and harder, if that even was possible. Soyeon noticed the effect her words were having, too, and moved towards his crotch again, taking in Y/n's large cock into her mouth once more. The gagging and slurping continued like they never left, this time overshadowing the low and steamy music blasting from the speakers of the car. Y/n pressed deeper into the gas pedal and was quickly met with the consequences as a bright flash woke him up from his quick ascent into heaven. He had gotten caught for speeding while having the leader of one of the biggest Kpop acts currently out with his dick in her mouth.

Nevertheless Y/n decided to just pay the fine and continued driving towards his destination. Once they had arrived he grabbed Soyeon's head and removed her from his crotch before finally giving her the long awaited kiss. The kiss was passionate, it was sloppy, it was hot and, most importantly, it was filled with lust. He practically shoved his tongue into the mouth of the petite woman next to him while moving his hands towards her waist. Soyeon interlocked her fingers behind his neck and slowly started getting rid of his shirt. Y/n, much to Soyeon's disapproval, backed off and insinuated that he wanted to get out of the car.

"As much as I'd love to fuck you right here and right now noona, we can't risk getting caught by dispatch or any other paparazzi. Plus I think my room is a bit comfier than this car."

"But we can just close the curtains Y/nn, please I need you in me.", Soyeon pouted.

Y/n damn near gave in but he knew better. He was horny but he wasn't about to let his dick do the thinking for him. He got out of the car and went over to Soyeon's side, opening the door for her before rushing into the hotel with her, vary of any potential paparazzi around the area. They ran into the nearest elevator, not even bothering to say hello to the staff working in the reception. The elevator doors soon closed and with that the couple continued where they had left off. Y/n hastily pressed the button with a large '15' on it before grabbing Soyeon by her thighs and lifting her off the ground, pressing her back against the elevator. Her legs wrapped around his torso as his right hand found its way between her legs. Her panties were soaked in her juices, her arousal so obvious that perhaps even a blind person could see it. Y/n teased her by stroking her pussy through her underwear, making sure to use long and drawn-out strokes. All the while using his tongue to further explore her mouth, almost sucking her soul out, much like she had done to him a few minutes prior in his car. The elevator soon stopped at their destination, the 15th floor and with a loud *Ding* Y/n got the message carried Soyeon out of the lift.

The 15th floor was exactly like one would imagine a 15th floor in a luxurious hotel to look like. A fancy red carpet on the floor, a mixture of white and beige tones with elegant and tasteful golden accents. There were vases placed in a pleasing distance from one another that looked like they'd put you in bankruptcy if you were to break, and ultimately replace, one and lastly, it was completely deserted. Alas not many could afford a room in the hotel, let alone a room in the highest and most expensive floor, but still it was as if the entire place was deserted. Y/n walked towards the door with a large golden number '5' on it and quickly pressed a six digit code into the pad at the door before opening it and closing the door with a strong kick. He turned the lights on and walked a bit while taking his shoes off.

After what seemed like an awful long amount of time he finally arrived at a bed and laid Soyeon on it. The bed was soft, the bed sheets smelled much like Y/n. It was like laying on a cloud, a cloud that so happens to have a smell that made you even hornier, if one were to believe Soyeon's description, that is. She didn't know what fragrance it was, she didn't know what about said fragrance made it so special but it was like it released pheromones into the air that made Soyeon want Y/m to fuck her even more. Y/n removed himself from Soyeon's lips for a second time that night, much to her annoyance, before going over to the light switch and turning it off. He proceeded to walk towards the large windows and pushed the curtains away, making the moon shine right into the room. Y/n slowly started stripping himself in front of Soyeon, coming full circle considering his partners today did this exact same thing for him, before throwing away his clothes somewhere into the room. The moon fell onto Y/n's smooth skin, making his muscular physique stand out even more. The lighting defined his muscles, making Soyeon drool even more. He took off his pants, which now had a few saliva stains thanks to Soyeon before climbing back on top of her. He kissed her again and for what felt like the fiftieth time today, it was like time stopped for the both of them.

It was as though a million small fireworks went off inside their brains, it was as if every single neuron was working in order to transmit dopamine and endorphins all throughout their bodies. Unfortunately they still needed oxygen, which forced them to stop making out after some time.

Y/n stared at Soyeon, practically undressing her with his eyes before speaking "Do you plan on undressing or do you want me to rip those clothes off of you noona ?"

"Do whatever you want to me baby, noona is all yours tonight", Soyeon replied with a raspy voice.

Y/n saw it as an invitation and so he grabbed at the bodice of her dress before, in one swift motion, ripping it in half. Just as Soyeon, who was obviously startled at the action of her younger lover, was about to say something, Y/n latched onto her neck, almost instantly finding and sucking on her sweet spot. For the third time that day, a room that belonged to Y/n was filled with moans as he marked his lovers neck with hickeys. Y/n descended, now giving her collarbones attention while also playing with her nipples. He continued going down and was now licking and sucking on his noona's breasts. Soyeon wasn't well endowed in that department but to Y/n they were perfect. With one hand he pinched and toyed with one nipple while the other got pleasured with his tongue and mouth. Soyeon threw her head back and continued moaning Y/n's name. She grabbed a fistful of his hair, much like he had done to her in his car, and pressed her lovers mouth even more into her breasts. Her other hand found it's way to Y/n's muscular back, looking for anything to use as something to hold on. Her long and sharp nails dug into the skin above his trapezius and scratched it, drawing blood and creating a mixture of pain and pleasure for Y/n. He continued licking across her body, spending time on her midsection and soon enough Soyeon's first orgasm arrived.

A wave of pleasure overtook the young woman, drowning her in ecstasy as the continued build up of the teasing in the car and the elevator as well as the mouth play in the car and the current fore play got too much for her and it came crushing down with what could be described as a spasm tsunami. Soyeon moaned, louder than she had been before, and Y/n's name could be heard throughout pretty much the entire floor. Her nails dug deeper into his back and her grip around his hair got tighter. Y/n decided to continue with what he was doing, as he now went on to rip the bottom part, or rather the part that was still intact, of Soyeon's dress, together with her now completely drenched panties before immediately diving in and tongue fucking her vagina. She tasted incredible, unlike anything Y/n had tasted before. She was sweet, it was addictive. It was as if the taste released pheromones into the air that made Y/n want to fuck Soyeon even more. He lapped up her constantly flowing juices as if he had been in a desert for the past weeks and had finally found a source of water. He practically drank Soyeon's fluids like his life depended on it. His tongue continuously made it's way into her inner walls, feeling around her hot core, exploring every nook and cranny until he finally found her g-spot. His tongue relentlessly aimed at it, focussing on it until once more, the pleasure got too overwhelming for Soyeon and she succumbed to her inner instincts.

Soyeon's second orgasm hit even harder than the first one, if possible. Her nails dug into the bed sheets, surely ripping them in some way, while her other hand pressed Y/n's head as deep as humanly possible into her crotch, surely suffocating her lover. Her climax washed over her once more like someone had thrown a bucket full of ice cold water over her head. It was as if all her senses had been turned up to the max. None of this mattered, however, as Y/n switched up his tactics and now inserted three fingers into Soyeon's tight pussy. His fingers curled up slightly as he aimed for the spot he had been abusing with his tongue prior, an action that elicited a reaction soon after as Soyeon screamed out his name in pleasure. His mouth latched onto her clit, his tongue switching between drawing letters onto her button and sucking on it. All those things eventually led to the inevitable as Soyeon, once again, arched her back while clawing at Y/n's head as the burning sensation in her core boiled over and traveled across her whole body.

Y/n slowly stood up and looked at the small woman beneath him. Her shoulder long hair sprawled out across the large bed. Her own drool dribbling down her chin. The moon shining on her petite breasts and the absolute mess that he had made of her lower body. Her legs were probably too weak to balance her weight after all the pleasure he had put her through. Y/n took of the last remaining piece of clothing, his underwear, before also throwing it into the growing stack of clothing. Soyeon looked up at her lover, lust still evident in her eyes, inviting him to enter her body, before nodding at him. Y/n slowly inserted himself in order to give Soyeon time to adjust to his size. Her breath hitched as her vision got blurry. Her breathing became quicker and more uneven. Her moans got louder and more drawn-out. Soyeon arched her back and slowly, after realising that Y/n wasn't moving, started moving herself, fucking herself with Y/n's dick. He got the message and soon upped his pace.

Soyeon's breath never went back to normal as the pace at which she was getting fucked never went down either. The bed was shaking, banging against the wall. Soyeon reached up and interlocked her fingers between Y/n's neck again. She slowly moved onto his back and soon enough her nails started marking even more portions of it. Her mouth also found its way onto his body as she bit into his shoulder, quite hardly, as she came once more. Her walls tightened around Y/n, making it almost impossible for him to move inside her as he helped her ride out her orgasm. After making sure that she came down from her high, Y/n switched positions, making her go face down and ass up as he was now fucking her into the mattress. He fucked her roughly, spanking her perky ass cheeks hard and often, making his hand start imprinting on them. Her moans started getting louder with each slap and her body also shook with each thrust. With every touch he gave it was as if her body became tighter and tighter. Y/n grabbed a fistful of her hair, making her look up at him before smashing their lips together. He lusted for her tongue again, he longed for the feeling and the taste of her soft, plump, cherry flavored lips. Their kiss was even sloppier and messier than before, tongues fighting for dominance and trying to explore each others mouth. A fight which was as won as soon as it started as with each pull of her hair, with each slap of her ass, with each thrust into her tight pussy, Soyeon was left with her mouth open. The pleasure became too much for the two of them as Y/n lost his composure and pushed Soyeon into the mattress. His larger body laid over her smaller frame as he relentlessly pounded into Jeon's pussy, his large cock almost splitting her in half. Her moans were turning into whimpers as she didn't even have the energy anymore to make loud noises. Y/n used one hand to play with her clit as the other was still used to slap her ass and soon enough the stimulation was too much, making Soyeon's insides tighten up once more around Y/n's dick. Her pussy sucked him in one more time as his strokes became messier and the focus shifted on their strength. With one last stroke Y/n buried himself as deep as he could, his tip almost kissing her womb before releasing stream after stream of his semen inside of her. His cock throbbed for what seemed like eternity as he unloaded every last drop that was inside his balls into Soyeon's body. He stayed inside her until everything was empty before removing himself and seeing what looked like a waterfall of his sperm come out of her pussy. He collapsed next to the goddess next to him before pulling her close to him. She instinctively grabbed onto him, cuddling with his body before almost immediately falling asleep.

-time skip-

Y/n POV

I wake up and my head is aching. Actually scratch that, my whole body is aching. Especially my back for some reason. I look over at the clock and see it's 7a.m. I have another five hours to kill until I'm needed at the venue again, great. Wait where's Soyeon noona? And what's this feeling-

I rip off the blanket and see something that's probably forever going to be engraved into my mind.

Soyeon noona is there. Naked. With my dick in her mouth.

*Pop* "Good morning baby. Did you sleep well ? I hope your back doesn't hurt too much, I really did a number on you while you were doing a number on me", she said before taking me into her mouth again.

"I slept- JESUS I slept very well noona, t-Thank you", I said while moaning as Soyeon licked a specific part of my dick.

I grabbed a bunch of her hair again, making a makeshift ponytail before helping guide her up and down my shaft. I start getting more invested as I am now basically using her mouth as a, very very expensive and very very gorgeous, pocked pussy. Gagging and slurping noises fill the room once more as her throat gets filled with my dick. I feel her saliva drip down my shaft onto my balls as I go deeper and deeper into her throat with each thrust. I can feel her tightening around me, making me feel things I've never felt before. Sweat starts dripping down my forehead as the throat fucking starts getting intenser. I start becoming self conscious and start asking myself if maybe I'm handling Soyeon too rough, however, one look at her face shows me the opposite as I can see a large grin appearing on her ethereal face. Slowly but surely my orgasm makes itself seen as a familiar sensation comes up from my core. Toes start curling, my dick starts throbbing and my head is thrown back before I bust inside Soyeon's tight throat. My load goes straight into her stomach as she swallows every last bit before releasing me with a loud popping noise and coming back up again.

"You know noona, I still haven't had breakfast yet", I say to her while slowly smirking.

"Oh yeah? And what do you want me to do about that?", Soyeon replies while crawling towards me.

"I don't know noona, I've been craving you a lot recently? Mind giving me a taste-"

I couldn't even finish as my face is greeted with Soyeon's amazing pussy. She sits on my face and I immediately get to work. First my tongue dances around her outer labia, teasing her entrance before diving in like yesterday and tongue fucking her. By now her insides have been basically memorised by my body, which helps me quickly find her g-spot again. Soyeon's moans fill the room once more with a sound that to me is angelic. She screams my name as I continuously pleasure the goddess on top of me. Soyeon starts grinding against my face, moving in circles on top of me. She moves her hips like she'd normally do on stage, throwing her ass around in a circle for me before my arms find their way onto Soyeon's thighs, grabbing them and pressing her body even harder against my mouth as I desperately try to drink up every last ounce of her fluids. I continue eating her out like it was my last day on earth until she stands up and suddenly squirts onto me and the bed sheets. She throws her head back and smiles but I quickly grab her thighs again and place her pussy back on top of my mouth. Soyeon's moans return as the never ending attack on her through constant stimulation goes into it's last phase.

My mouth latches onto her clit as I start writing my name on her with my tongue. Her screams get louder and louder as the stimulation on her already sensitive body becomes too much. Her body shakes again, thighs pressing against my head and back arching, until she finally drops on top of me and falls asleep once more.

I stand up and stretch, looking around for a bit. The room was enormous, much more than I'd ever need if I'm honest. The doorway was accompanied by a walk-in closet that currently housed my clothes and shoes. If one continued going straight forward one would find a small living room space where a large couch, a small table and a tv, that was mounted onto the wall, stood. Currently there was also a pair of very expensive high heels and my shoes thrown next to it. There was a few plants and vases as well as paintings decorating the 'living room' before the large bed could be seen. The bed was...a mess. It was wet due to a mixture of sweat, cum and saliva. The sheets were ripped, the pillow cases completely wrinkled, the sheets on the ground. Not to mention the large pile of clothes in the middle of the room and the ripped Dior dress whose shreds were in different parts of the room. I picked up the clothes and folded them neatly before putting them into a bag. They won't get worn again for the time being so might as well put them away already. Having sone that I walked into the bathroom. The bathroom was also incredibly large for no good reason. I turned the water on for a bath and left the bathroom again.

"What time is it baby", a sleepy Soyeon asked me groggily

"Around 8ish noona", I replied

"I'm gonna go take a bath...Do you want to join me?", I asked her as I leaned on the doorframe

"If you want to fuck me that badly you could just say it baby, no need to-"

"I want to fuck you again noona. Want to do it in the bathtub?", I interrupted her

She looked at me a bit shocked before slowly smiling and standing up, or rather trying (and failing miserably) to stand up.

"Careful noona. You have a performance to give today."

"You really did a number on me wow, and here I thought Jihyo was exaggerating when she told me she couldn't walk properly after you were finished with her.", she said

I carried her to the bathtub before getting in myself.

"How long do we have until we need to be at the venue?", Soyeon asked

"About 4 hours.", I replied

"Oh baby you better start thinking about a speech because after these 4 hours you'll want to marry your noona"

And with that Soyeon smashed her lips against mine..again.

[undergoing-mitosis]

i've been listening to sofia isella's entire discography today cause im insane and it's crazy how well some of the songs fit with death note characters. or maybe im just too i deep in and im slowly losing my mind. anyhow

Death Note Characters as SOFIA ISELLA Songs

Light: I Looked The Future in the Eyes, It's Mine. a song about being high on the power trip of believing the near future is yours for the taking hello???????? 'they ask us, "how's it feel to be god's favourite?" we say, "we don't know, we've never known different."'

L: Cacao and Cocaine. more specifically fanon L. more specifically lawlight L. plus L feeling unfufilled if his life isn't riddled with the danger of detective work. 'would you like your heart to get attacked? would that feel better than boredom in another beige and bland cul de sac?'

Mello: Hot Gum. a slutty song with fire imagery and religious metaphors. need i say more? 'i watch us burn and fall, the heat is ten feet tall... and the flicker flames weave in through my teeth.'

Matt: Rainbow Rocket Ride. literally the mellodramattic song we've all been waiting for. with video game metaphors n references??? could something be more perfect? 'i found my joy with a runaway boy, and the cosmos is so big it won't notice we went missing'

a few more under the cut:

these next ones im less sure about but i still think they fit the vibes of the character:

Near: All of Human Knowledge Made Us Dumb. technically this is a song about the internet rotting our brains, but the general vibes of disconnection from reality and numbness, and everything making more sense in fiction and theory than reality is very near-coded in my opinion. i have always headcanoned near as a hikikomori, though less because he just doesn't want to go out and more because he physically can't function in the world. high support needs autism who???? 'and i can know every answer that's ever been known, but when everyone's together everyone's alone'

Misa: Everybody Supports Women. again a bit of a stretch, im not completely sold on it. but there are moments that make me go ugh yes. it feels like the toxicity of the idol industry along with, well, everyone around her going against misa, or at least that's how it feels to her. i think it encapsulates the isolation of her character and how people don't see her suffering cause she has a pretty face perfectly. misa is such a tragic and ultimately lonely character who lost everything she has ever loved. and she does not get enough comfort and sympathy for that."she's probably self-centred, we hate her and she's nothing, if everybody leaves her then she had it coming"

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

So I’ve been meaning to ramble about the beauty of four walls for so long now but am only just getting round it so i really apologise because the amount I’ve enjoyed reading every chapter and just the pleasure the story has bought me I should’ve been leaving huge appreciation on every chapter. You’re so talented.

I’m just gonna start by saying that four walls is one of, if not the most, thought provoking and intimate things I’ve ever read. I don’t really have the vocab to explain what it is about it, but the way you portray emotions and just the delicacy of every situation, especially in chapter 8 where they finally get together, is just something else. There’s this underlying yearning and carefulness in each chapter that’s just so realistic, and seeing it written down and feeling that ache in my chest whenever something you’ve written just encapsulates that so perfectly is just heaven.

Also the way you depict insecurity ;-; Alex thinking miles is suddenly going to start looking at him differently. And that possessiveness of miles and confusion he feels about Suzy because she’s more than just a fling and is in Miles’ personal space and bubble that Alex sees as his but now includes her. I just can’t because it’s so relatable and written SO PERFECTLY.

And the little details? THE LITTLE DETAILS! These tiny bits of intimacy like the mixed jackets and the shoes next to the door and the description of miles’ belt buckle and how it moves with his breathing is just- omg. And the little addition of Alex always trying to unlock each door with the wrong set of keys? And the ‘where’s home’ ‘here’ ’me too’? SOBBING. It’s honestly a little scary how perfectly you depict that kind of lostness that can be common for people who are constantly moving about and find that security in that one person who’s always been their person no matter where they are. Sometimes I really think you must just be one of them writing their actual story just pretending it’s fanfic xD

And the nerves, and that doubt, like even though Alex must know deep deep down that miles feels the same he just needs to provoke it until Miles breaks and he can be sure. And that ‘c’mon al, it’s never just you, is it?’ That miles says because it’s just them, on the same wavelength, overthinking themselves into being convinced the other doesn’t want them. And the HURT omfg the hurt. Miles thinking Alex is just pushing to see what happens and to get his own way like again I can’t explain how incredibly you do that and how realistically you portray it and without seeing inside Alex’s mind it does seem like that’s exactly what he’s doing. But Miles’ perception of him vs the way Alex sees him as home (like ‘just the two of them alone in the room Alex most often sees when he closes his eyes to escape other rooms’)just ASGDKFLFOENDB. Babies.

I’m really really late going somewhere and this isn’t nearly the appreciation I want to show for you or four walls, nor is it anywhere close to highlighting all the things that are just phenomenal about the way you write and portray these characters. But the way you write has honestly introduced me to this whole new world of how characters emotion’s should look, and how it’s this simmering beneath the surface that you do absolutely incredibly that makes the characters so much deeper and more vulnerable and just perfection

So thank you so so much, honestly love this story and your writing beyond belief <3333333

hii 💖 oh my GOD where to start??? this is so unbelievably, UNBELIEVABLY lovely i don't even know what to say 😭😭 genuinely, i can't even begin to tell you how much this made my day (scratch that. my whole WEEK) when it popped up in my inbox 🥺

writing four walls over the past year has brought me so much joy, so to hear that this little world i've created has been bringing other people joy too is truly the most special feeling in the world ✨💫

your kind words about how i portray emotions and inner workings is just - god, i don't even know what to say 🥺 that's always been one of my favourite things about writing, but when you immerse yourself in a character's headspace as much as i have with alex in this fic, it can also make it really challenging. like i definitely spend a LOT of time going back and forth and worrying that i haven't got it quite right to make sense for his character, or that i've spent too much time on the introspective side of things vs dialogue. so yeah - to hear that when you're reading it all the emotions feel that real?? aghhhhh. that's everything i could possibly want and makes all the challenges of writing it feel TOTALLY worthwhile 💗 (also, i love that you feel that ache in your chest when you're reading, because that's what i feel when i'm writing them in this fic too 🥺)

i'm also so glad you think all of alex's feelings of jealousy/insecurity around suzy work - that's been something i've really enjoyed writing actually, it feels like her presence is (slowly 🤦‍♀️) helping him unlock a lot of doors that it might have taken him a lot longer to notice otherwise! it's been really interesting to write that dynamic.

AHHHHH as i'm sure you can tell, i'm an absolute sucker for little details, so it makes me SO HAPPY that you enjoy all those elements of the fic 💗 also all your comments about chapter eight specifically and how everything unfolded there have made my heart absolutely sing 🥹 i was actually really nervous about sharing that chapter and worried that it wouldn't measure up, so hearing your lovely words about that scene is just - thank you 🥺 it truly means so much💖

honestly it's not the first time someone has said that they think i must be either alex or miles writing this, and each time i hear it it just leaves me speechless because that is just the BIGGEST compliment ever??? 😭 obviously we only get glimpses of what they're like from interviews, lyrics etc - but they have *such* a special dynamic and are such fascinating people, so to feel like i've managed to capture even a semblance of who they are is truly so special, thank you 💗

i'm going to stop flailing at you in a moment because i feel like i've rambled on quite long enough now, but this: "the way you write has honestly introduced me to this whole new world of how character's emotions should look" THIS??? this has to be one of my favourite things someone has ever said about my writing 🥺 i want to print it out on a post-it note and stick it above my desk ✨

thank you so much for taking the time to leave such a thoughtful and generous comment - i truly can't begin to tell you what a gift feedback like this is, and how much it inspires me and keeps me going through the tougher moments of writing 🙏 you also sent it at a time where i'd been struggling particularly with self-criticism and doubt around the chapter i'm currently writing, and honestly reading all your kind words just restored so much confidence and joy in my writing. thank you so very much, i'm wishing you the most wonderful day and sending all the best vibes your way 💜💜💜

(PS the next chapter is nearly ready now! 💖)

[suchacomet]

Spring Awakening Fandom Tag

(By @winter-asleepening, tagged (kinda) by @feelssogoodinmyarms )

sorry for this being long and for jumping in on this out of nowhere, i got excited and i missed talking about this show now that i’m once again in my yearly spring awakening phase thanks to seeing a local production yesterday :)

1. How were you introduced to the show?

i was an emo kid trying to find musicals i liked bc i started doing theater in high school, i saw american idiot was made into a musical, and followed the john gallagher jr rabbit hole to a b00tl3g of obc spring awakening. this happened to be in 2014 and when i heard about dwsa on broadway i conned my mom into taking me to nyc to see it (i didnt tell her how sexual it was i just said “it’s about teens coming of age in germany set to rock music” and she had Words for me during that intermission lol)

2. Seen a production live?

yes, four: dwsa, a local college production, and two productions at local theater companies in the areas i’ve lived

3. Dream role/character you relate to most

y’all already know it’s moritz…. i imprinted on him when i was 14 and have never stopped being obsessed with him as a character. but i think it’s more likely i’d get the chance to play ilse before moritz and i would love to play ilse as well

4. Favorite male character

mort steeple :) i have never gotten enough of this dude, ever

5. Favorite female character

wendla <3 she’s such a good character when she’s played with the right amount of joy, stubbornness, and curiosity

6. Deaf West Revival or Original Broadway Cast?

dwsa all the way. i appreciate obc for what it is but dwsa is my definitive best revival/adaptation ever ever ever

7. Favorite song

comet on its way :) christ such a whole, like, deal 🙄😏

but if you force me to pick “a real song” that “is actually in the show” then… i think a production that has a really good “and then there were none” is killer bc it means 1. they’re focusing on my favorite boy moritz and 2. they have an adult woman who plays fanny gabor compassionately but flawed in a way that underscores the show’s themes around adults not trusting kids with their own minds and bodies. which i greatly enjoy

8. Least favorite song

this is unfair of me bc it never fails to make me cry and it has one of my favorite lyrics ever in it (window by window you try and look into this brave new you that you are) but it’s “the guilty ones” bc i think “there once was a pirate” is better. my hot take is that dwsa is only version of spring awakening i’ve ever seen where i actually prefer their use of guilty ones instead of pirate

9. Favorite quote/line

musical: so maybe i should be some kind of laundry line / hang their things on me / and i will swing ‘em dry / you just wave in the sun through the afternoon / and then see / they come to set you free / beneath the rising moon - don’t do sadness it’s just such an evocative description of feeling hopeless against all the pressures of life and perfectly encapsulates being 15 and desperate and just wanting a little bit of relief. plus the way daniel durant and alex boniello performed this is so killer. moritz stiefel i love you

play: “don’t let’s be sad […] if we recall this in thirty years, perhaps we shall make fun of it.——and yet everything is so beautiful. the mountains glow; the grapes hang before our mouths and the evening breeze caresses the rocks like a playful flatterer.” from hans in the vineyard scene. augh it’s just so tender and lovely in a way that the musical doesn’t have the time/ability to address, with the acknowledgement that yes this moment is temporary and who knows if ernst and hanschen will “make it”. and yet. everything is so beautiful. also PROOF THAT HANSCHEN ISNT A CREEP OR MANIPULATIVE HE IS ALSO A TEEN BOY IN LOVE FUCK YOU STEVEN SATER

10. Favorite TV performance

always and forever dwsa touch me on seth meyer i have seen it at least two hundred times and i’m not exaggerating

11. Favorite cast member(s)

daniel durant always always always. he is such a talent i’m so glad his career seems to be taking off, he’s genuinely one of the best actors i’ve ever seen in my whole life.

12. Favorite cast member moment

can i say 1st national tour cabaret where the boys performed comet on its way in order to bring up comet on its way again. if not it’s when i gave daniel durant a painting of him as moritz at stage door and i was a shy anxious teen who learned just enough asl to say “hi” and “thank you” and “will you sign my playbill please” and he was SO sweet to me and lovely and he hugged me and i know actors do that kind of shit all the time and i’m sure he doesn’t remember it but it really made my whole life when it happened :’)

13. Do you write fan fiction?

not outside of personal catharsis pieces that have never seen the light of day. i made an aloto/vineyard scene web weaving post though that i do think goes hard

14. Do you make fan art?

i still love the moritz and then there were none piece i did a few years ago but i haven’t done a whole lot past that… that may change though i want to get back into drawing

15. Do you cosplay?

no, but spring awakening costumes have 10000% influenced my real life fashion and hair decisions. lol

16. Don’t do Sadness or Blue Wind?

i just saw this GORGEOUS performance of dds/bw where ilse sobbed through her verse of blue wind and the rest of the cast like gathered around her and slowly peeled away to represent her memory/longing for real connection and the reality of her never really having that at all, and really underscoring that her spoken lines about her new life in the artist’s colony and wanting to take moritz home are just posturing to hide how lonely she is… so right now i think blue wind

17. Word of Your Body or the Reprise?

reprise when it’s done earnestly, but i do really love the lyrics in woyb

18. Touch Me or My Junk?

my junk! i love seeing the different ways it’s staged between georg and hanschen and the girls, plus it’s the only time the girls get to be horny

19. Explain the Song of Purple Summer

it’s a metatextual message from the story of spring awakening to the audience that underscores the themes of open and honest communication being the key to healthy people and relationships, it’s asking the adults in the audience to believe children (when they say they’re gay, when they ask for information and want to be given all of it, when they ask for help and say they want to die), it’s a message of hope to the kids in the seats who relate too much to the kids on stage, telling us that it will get better

20. Explain the Song of Purple Summer (wrong answers only)

horses fuck and have foal babies idk <3

that was very fun thank you for indulging me. if any of mine olde spring awakening/dwsa mutuals are still around please consider this me tagging you <3

[lex-the-lesbiann]

Angel Eyes & Basketball by Foot Ox is about Normal and Scary actually

(not in a romantic way, in my mind they are gay-lesbian solidarity)

Normal:

Scary:

Explanation below the cut if you want to listen to me ramble :3

im gonna go a few lines at a time for this to try and organize it better and ill really try to not over explain :]

Normal:

“There are flowers growing all around a massive animal inside of me”

the way i interpret it, the animal is obviously the Doodler but in the original context of the song i think its interesting that they make a point to say that flowers are growing around the animal, encasing it, maybe in an attempt to hide or shelter it. For my interpretation as it relates to the Doodler, i think it represents the Doodlers good intentions despite the bad outcomes

“And its so ugly And I’m so broken And I’m so ugly and it’s so broken”

the Doodler and Normal have very similar experiences which makes them also have very similar feelings and i think this encapsulates how Normal felt during at the church of the doodler, just this extreme catharsis and recognition being found in an ugly and broken animal

“I am calling all of my friends to pull me out from this hole But they’re so caught up in their own shit And I’m so caught up in my own shit”

I don’t really have much to say for this one because it can kinda be applied to all of the teens, there’s nothing particular Normal Specific here but they’re all just going through it man

“Worlds collapsing all inward And the drones are piercing through it’s own skin But I think we should live together Yeah, I think we should live together”

to me, “i think we should live together” isnt about moving in together but rather, not dying in the face of the world collapsing and not even just that, its about not dying with other people, because you have these other people with you and they’re also not dying if that makes sense? And i think that very much fits with Normals ideology because he’s obviously very big on connecting with the people around him even if everything is going to shit and even if nobody else really wants to be friends with him (not saying that the rest of the teens dont want to be his friend, this was more of an in general thing)

“And you have to believe me when I say I understand That no one around here seems to understand But you have got to make an effort Yeah, you have got to make an effort”

And this is where I can also start talking about Scary because in my mind this is basically Normal talking to her. And like I was saying before, Normal is very motivated to try and make everyone like him (making the effort), so when someone like Scary so outwardly seems to not care (even though she actually does), it would be very frustrating. But i can also see this being Normal talking to himself because pretty much no one else in the group seems to care as much about being friends if that makes sense? not to say the other teens dont care about each other, they do, but Normal cares so outwardly

Scary:

“Like kids smoking in cemeteries Trying to remember what it’s like to be nothing again So maybe it won’t be so scary When they finally meet the maker at all”

In my mind, “the maker” is Willy and because of how he is, Scary has to try and be nothing when she associates herself with him, even if she doesn’t directly realize it. This is definitely a plate of corn moment but I really appreciate the irony that when Scary was most aligned with Willy, she called everyone else “sheep” even though the rest of the teens had literally just ran away from and disobeyed their fathers while Scary was perfectly content to just follow Willy and went with whatever he said.

“There are flowers growing all around the tiny fish swimming in my blood Begging me for more cheap coffee Begging me for more cheap coffee”

Okay, you’re gonna start to sense a pattern here, but the cheap coffee is also Willy and i can explain. its not so much that it directly represents Willy, but more so the sense of a parental figure that is somewhat, sometimes proud of her, hence the comparison to cheap coffee. But anyway I got ahead of myself, the fish (and btw i love that they’re fish bc get it, stamplers and fishing. you get it) are sort of her anti-conscience if thats a word, basically just something that tells her that she can have what she wants immediately and she doesnt have to work much for it, it’ll just be there and sure it won’t be as good as it could be if you put in more work but do you even really deserve the good one? just take the easy one, it fits you better. i hope that made sense

“Swimming round a kingdom of regrets Slowly building up inside of me”

Pretty much the same as what i was just talking about before but this is the result of choosing the “cheap coffee” and i like to relate this to the scene where Scary asks Willy for a hug and he laughs at her because, if i were to relate that scene to this song, Scary was asking Willy to essentially be more than he is, to be more than “cheap coffee” to give her a reason to stay but he’s an asshole so he just isnt. And then the regrets are obviously just the regret she feels. i really hope that made sense i dont think im explaining myself well.

“But there are things that I believe in Yeah, sacred things that I am keeping for you to see Later when you need them, like a Christmas tree Covered in light blue ornaments”

I think this can represent just how much Scary is a poser and knows it. She knows that she‘s pretending but only reveals these things when she absolutely has to. For example, at the black parade and at the mayors office.

Alright thats it im done, i hope this was at least a little bit coherent lmao :3

[purplelupins]

ok hi hello im back and have read the new chapter twice haha

obviously excellent, enjoyed the entire thing!! ive found your deviations from the show super interesting in that they are realistic enough that i don't even question it while reading; and it keeps me guessing despite knowing the story so well already. it also gives you so much room to yank my beating heart out with moments like ali :'(. (i love it don't ever stop)

FAV SPECIFIC MOMENTS TIME WHOOT WHOOT

"John finished and closed his eyes as he found his patience for you."

there's a headstone just in front of me that reads "your dignity". this sentence is engraved on it.

the idea of having the space to be the feral, scared animal i am? and him just being a steady, patient man waiting for the panicked lamb in his arms to stop writhing? good lord. i dont know how you read my mind so well but damnit you did!! there's of course more to be said about him (a damned man) reaching out to god still to find strength to deal with his charge, but this section is plenty long enough haha.

"but he knelt in front of you and tucked the blanket around your hips and thighs, then began putting the socks on your feet like it was the most normal thing in the world."

i see you!!! you thought you could sneak a feet washing as a metaphor for love reference in here and i wouldn't notice!! you fool! but seriously this is wonderfully subtle and ties in SO SO well with when John talks about the similarities in his own company he preferred to keep and Jesus's.

it's from the first episode, "No, he seemed to go straight for those folks who weren’t in a state of grace. They were his favorite people, turns out. They were the ones he called friends." another excellent example of how well you characterize him, and evidence of the dedication put in to this fic! :3 (had me also digging through screenplays to get accurate dialog lol)

less specific but still moments i want to mention!

all of the hunter/prey metaphors and references are done so nicely and perfectly encapsulate the raw, slow build of panic that flanagan brings to his works. <3

every time there is a nod to the creature that john is now i am squealing and kicking my feet. the idea of being the one person he'd really struggle but force himself to restrain it around is downright delicious. it's also no longer he that is holy and being tempted, he is tainted and being tautned by divinity in his own living room. which of course is such tasty angst i have to approve.

also every time john would be over the moon excited about something and have to choke it down lest he spook his lamb, perfection.

and finally, the sunrise. he would have stayed there and that drives me up the wall. the battle of wills that happens is so good, and it ending with acceptance is beautiful. and terrifying for what it could possibly foreshadow (≖_≖ ).

but no matter how it ends i will be SAT i am loving this story and cannot wait to see where you take it! its been like a real solid meal i can sink my teeth into :)!

ok thank you once again and im now off to hide in a cave after sending you this essay (please tell me if it's weird btw) lmao - 🌟c

I don’t think you understand. I am SQUEALING.

I don’t even know where to start but just the fact that you clocked so much of the subtle things that I put into my writing to build different emotions and connections has me so giddy.

Ah yes. I too am completely and absolutely feral for the patience of a man. And John has much of it.

I’ve been really enjoying their back and forth with each other too. Just him trying to be so reserved and slow with her while she’s really trying to trust him because he’s all she really has right now to help her through this. Their little moments of togetherness I think really shows how humans truly do desire some kind of connection.

Ngl I screamed a little when I saw you noticed the sock/foot thing. Didn’t think anyone would notice. She truly is his saving grace and he is going to give her the best possible care he can, even if she doesn’t like it.

I am over the moon and just wiggling in my seat with happiness. Thank you thank you thank you for all of your thoughtful analysis and comments and thank you for being here to read it!!!

Please don’t feel weird about sending me long asks or comments, they are really what keep me going and writing because without the feedback it’s just like sending writing into a black hole! I love you so much for sending me all this truly!!

-Nora

[daughter-of-melpomene]

💿 + Lark?? -🍂

Thank you so much for this ask, Alvita!! (And I'm also gonna tag @auxiliarydetective and @starcrossedjedis since they're the other One Piece girlies!! <3

"Green Finch and Linnet Bird" from the musical Sweeney Todd.

One of two songs that inspired Lark's character, and the one that inspired her name! This song talks a lot about the singer feeling trapped in their own situation and likening themself to a bird in a cage, which definitely describes Lark's feelings during her time being the songbird of the World Government. This would definitely be a song she would make up and sing to some caged birds she could see from whatever large home the Government had her staying in while she was travelling around and singing for the Marines.

"Into the Unknown" from the movie Frozen 2.

The other song that inspired Lark's character. For years before she ever meets the Straw Hats, Lark has been hearing the call of the open sea, urging her to run from the World Government and set out on an adventure on the high Blues, to learn all the pirate songs she could and even write a few of her own, and this is a perfect encapsulation of that.

"Always Sing" by RaeLynn.

Throwing a little country in here! Despite how much the World Government forced her to sing and dance and be there little songbird and restricted what she was allowed to sing, music will forever be a bit part of Lark's life, and this song is perfectly written to show her thoughts on music and singing and now necessary it is for her.

"Dandelions" by Ruth B.

This song is absolutely perfect for Lark and Sanji's relationship. They're both helplessly pining for each other for ages before they finally get together, both of them wishing desperately for the other to return their feelings and be with them, but not seriously thinking that it will happen. (And they get the biggest "I told you so"s from Nami and Zoro, respectively, when it does happen.)

"My Jolly Sailor Bold" by Acapella Onion.

There is an entire scene I have attached to this song of Lark singing it for a whole room of pirates to try and get the Straw Hats out of trouble, and it's basically the scene where Sanji full-on falls in love with her. I won't share the whole thing just yet, but it's definitely what comes to mind whenever I hear this song.

send me a 💿+ oc and i’ll list five songs that remind me of them!!