#today was....really rough. really rough. but I ordered dinner instead of cooking and am using my electric blanket

[thelastspeecher]

I bought the Brother Bear soundtrack on CD but since my laptop doesn't have a disk drive I only just now was able to put it on my iPod

I'm listening to it and it's honestly making me the happiest I've been all day, the most relaxed and comfortable I've been in a few days

nostalgia man

[beaker1636]

Bad Day - Vinny Request

“Mom, this is not coming out how I want it too, something doesn’t quite taste right.  What am I missing? I have put in…. (Random stuff from your favorite meal).” Vinny asks his mother as he tries to save the dinner he is cooking for you.

“Oh, you are forgetting…. (Random thing).  Why are you trying to make it yourself, I could just do it for you if you came over this weekend or something,” she asks, giggling while he runs around the kitchen trying to finish everything.

“y/n is having a really bad day today and this is her favorite meal.  She called me on her break earlier crying so I canceled my planned stream to cook for her and spend time with her to try and make her feel better.  I was just going to order us dinner but decided that it would be better to try and make this for her instead,” he says, taking a second to look at his phone screen where his mother was, smiling at her.

“You are a good man Vincenzo, your dad and I did well.  Do you need anything else? I can let you go so you can focus on what you are doing,” he mother offers, happy to see how much he cares about his girlfriend.

“Is that okay, I love you mom,” he says, looking at the stove again.

“I love you too Vin, good luck,” she says before hanging up the facetime call.

1 Hour Later

You pull up to Vin’s house, letting out a sigh before you slowly get out of your car.  Walking into the house you hear music coming from the kitchen and follow it, smiling slightly to yourself when you see Vinny standing at the kitchen sink working on dishes.  

You wrap your arms around him from behind, lying your head on his back as you take a second to just enjoy being with him.  He shuts the water off, turning around to face you before he picks you up, moving to set you on the kitchen counter so that he could stand between your legs, giving you a soft kiss before wrapping arms around you and pulling you to his chest.

He doesn’t say a word rather just holds you tight, knowing that right now you don’t need to talk, you just need to let it all out.  And that is what you do, finally letting the building tears fall from your eyes as he holds you, not judging you or making you feel weak, just letting you get everything out that you had to hold in at work all morning.

Unfortunately he had to pull away from you a couple minutes later because the timer on the oven went off and he had to pull dinner out of the oven quick.  But as soon as he finishes he is back to you, this time he grabs your chin to make you look at him so that he can wipe the tears that linger away with his thumbs before he leans down and gives you another gentle kiss, hoping that you feel a little better now. 

“Thank you for making my favorite meal Vin, I appreciate you so much,” you say softly, glancing away from him.

“Of course, I love you.  I have a couple other things planned for us to do after we eat, but for now why don’t you go sit on the couch and I will bring you dinner and some wine in just a second,” he responds, helping you back off your place on the counter.

You quietly make your way to the living room so that you can sit, him following behind shortly after to bring you your plate, both of you soon starting to eat quietly as he puts your favorite tv show on in the background.  

You notice the time when you finish eating and glance over at him. “Don’t you need to go stream? I know you had one planned tonight,” you ask him softly.

“Not anymore, I canceled it because you need me more than any of them do tonight,” he says with a smile towards you. “I can do it another day.”

“Thank you,” you hum softly, moving your plate to the coffee table so that you can move to sit on his lap, facing him as you wrap your arms around him and bury your face in his neck, just sitting there quietly as he comforts you. One arm holds you close while the other moves to rub soothing circles on your back, wanting you to feel relaxed after your rough day.

“I’m sorry I am in such a mood tonight Vin, I don’t mean to ruin your night just because I had a rough day.  Today was so bad that I walked out but somehow my boss talked me into coming back into the building.  I just finally had enough of our office manager being a total bitch and don’t know how much longer I can take it before I snap.  Maybe I need to finally just snap and put her back in her place.  Even the newer girls have noticed that she treats me like shit compared to everyone else,” you vent, letting everything that happened today out as he sits there, listening.

“Do you think she treats you like shit because she knows that you are friends with your boss and it bothers her?” Vinny asks you softly, he has been thinking this for awhile but hasn’t said it because he knows that it would bother you if he did, but he figures you already are in a shit mood.

“I’m starting to think so, but it's not my fault her and I went to school together and were close.  It shouldn’t matter because I still do my job and I do it well.  I don’t know I guess, I think I am going to begin job hunting this weekend so I can get out before I finally break down,” you mumble softly, still cuddling yourself up to him.  The two of you don’t get to have many moments like these together so when you do you absolutely take advantage of it.

“I can help you look if you want, honestly we’ve been talking about getting a PA for tour to help us with food runs, laundry, pretty much all the shit we can’t do anymore if you want me to mention to Chris that you are interested, it would be nice to have you on tour with us.” He says, hoping that you would be interested but knowing you might not be.

“I can’t take a pay cut and afford my rent and everything Vin, so that wouldn’t work out when you aren’t touring.  And don’t say move in with you again, you know I don’t want to depend on you for things like that.” you grumble, annoyed he brought it up right now.

“And that’s fine, I was just throwing it out there.  You still should move in but we can find you another full time job around here, I will help you do it and get you out of there, promise.” he says softly, not wanting to push it too hard and upset you more. “Let’s go upstairs, why don’t you take a nice hot bath to soothe your nerves and relax.  I picked up one of those bath bombs that you like while I was at the store.”

“Will you take one with me? Or at least sit with me please?” You ask softly, a little embarrassed but you don’t want to be alone, you want him to stay with you.  Even when the two of you don’t talk just having him around you makes you happy.

“Of course, lets go,” he says softly.

You stand up and wait for him to start making his way upstairs, following him up the stairs.  He starts running the water and then turns to glance at you, moving to give you a quick kiss before he helps you slip out of your own clothing before he removes his and gets in the tub, then opening his arms so you can get in as well and lean back into him, relaxing into his touch as you sit, both of you quietly.

One of his hands lightly rubs your arm gently as you both sit there, enjoying the closeness and the light touches, every so often you turn your head so that you can give him a soft kiss.

“You know, I think I needed this just as much as you did.  It’s been too long since we have had a moment like this together,” Vin says softly, letting you thread your fingers together when his hand comes to rest on your belly.

“It has, hey Vin, thank you for everything tonight.  I appreciate you and everything you have done for me tonight.  I love you,” you turn your head so you can look at him, taking in his closed eyes and soft features on his relaxed face.  

These are the moments that make you want to agree to move in with him, the two of you practically live together when he isn’t touring anyways so would it be that different? You mind is running and you don’t notice that he started talking until he moves, you now blushing.

“Where did you go y/n? You are blanking out on me,” he teases, laughing when he realized you were blushing and now avoiding his eyes.

“I was just thinking, considering your offer of finally moving in…” you trail off, knowing that it would make him happy if you did agree, but also worried about what would happen if you two don’t work out.

“I know that you keep saying no because you are worried about us breaking up, but we aren’t going to so that shouldn’t even be a thought for you.  Let’s not think about that right now, it is not important.  How about we get out now that the water is getting cold and then we can go do whatever you want to do for the rest of the night.” He offers, you relieved that he isn’t dwelling on the subject.  “We can even try one of your puzzle games again, even if I can’t ever solve any of the puzzles before you do.”

The thought makes you giggle softly to yourself, you love watching him trying to play them with you because he is really cute when he is focused and thinking. 

“Can we just curl up in bed and watch a movie? I don’t care what I just want to be with you tonight for a while.” You respond softly as you both step out of the bathtub, drying off and slipping into pajamas. 

“Absolutely, let's go,” he says, both of you making your way to his bed and laying down when you start a random netflix movie.

Vinny looks down at you where your head is laying on his chest and chuckles, it was only about 20 minutes in and you had already fallen asleep.  He shifts so he can pull a blanket up around the two of you and just shuts the movie off, deciding that he isn’t against going to bed early tonight with you.

[wrenreid]

Not So Innocent

mature topics such as violence, death, and trauma discussed in this story. all chapters in masterlist

Chapter Eleven

You stir awake, immediately knowing you hadn't been asleep very long. Spencer is still passed out from his eventful week as an agent. You let him sleep, quietly getting clothes out of your case, and heading to the bathroom.

After taking a quick shower, you get changed into a green long sleeved body suit, skinny jeans, and your usual black boots. You take Spencer's jacket that he had laid on your shoulders weeks ago and head out the door. You still have a bit of money left over from what you took from 'home' and from what Spencer had given you while he was gone.

While walking to the store, you feel the drizzle of rain fall onto your body and dampen your hair. You see people drive or walk by as you make your way on the sidewalk.

At the store, you pick up some eggs, more orange juice, bagels, and anything else you think you'll need to make you and Spencer breakfast. You figured it's the least you could do in return for letting you stay with him... and of course for being a big fat liar.

You walk back to his place, ignoring a cat call from a probably drunken man on the side of the street. It takes a lot for you not to lash out at him, but you don't have your knife or the time for that.

When you get back to Spencer's, you start cooking in the kitchen. You try to be as quiet as possible to not wake Spencer up before breakfast is ready.

You whip up a bagel sandwich type thing with eggs, cheese, and previously frozen hashbrowns. It doesn't look too bad.

You call Spencer, knowing it's not the nicest way to wake somebody up, but not really caring. He comes into the room quickly with messy hair and worried eyes.

"Yes? Are you okay?"

You let out a little chuckle. "Yeah, I’m fine. I made breakfast."

"You didn't have to do that."

"Well, I did."

He presses his lips to yours softly and looks down at you with his cheeks pink and lips turned up into a smile.

"What was that for?" You say with a grin.

"A thank you. Am I not allowed to do that?"

"You definitely are allowed to do that," you ruffle is messy bed head hair.

The two of you sit down at the table with a glass of orange juice and your bagel sandwiches.

"I'm not sure if it'll taste okay."

"It tastes perfectly fine," he says, taking a second bite.

You smile, "Great."

After breakfast he asks you what you want to do today. He hasn't been called into work, they're getting the day off since it was a rough couple of days with that case.

"I'm not sure,” you say.

He ponders for a moment.

"You can go back to sleep. I can tell you're tired,” you tell him.

"I just look like this."

You chuckle at that. “Seriously, Spence. If you need to rest, do it. I’m not saying you look rough, I just know you’ve probably had a tiring week.”

“Do you want to watch a movie?" He suggests instead.

"Sure," you say. He's stubborn.

The two of you put on a movie and eat some of the mint chip ice cream he had in his freezer. You sit close to him on the couch, legs folded to the side of you. The movie starts.

Not long after Spencer sets down his finished bowl of ice cream on the coffee table and lays his head in your lap, he falls back asleep. He was hesitant to use you as a pillow, but you assured the awkward doctor that you were completely fine with it.

You look down at his handsome, sleepy face. His eyelashes kiss the apples of his cheeks as he sleeps. You move his hair out of his face with a smile, then avert your attention back to the tv.

A strange feeling consumes you, you can't pinpoint what it is. You watch as Spencer Reid stirs in his sleep, eyeballs fluttering behind his lids.

—

Yesterday, you and Spencer spent the whole day lounging around the house. After he'd woken up from his nap, the two of you attempted to make dinner. It was a failed attempt. You ended up ordering take out and watching an old movie Spencer likes.

You've just woken up from the most restful night you've had in a while. Spencer lays beside you, it seems as if he's just waking up as well.

"Good morning," you say with a yawn. He smiles back at you.

He looks a lot better than he did before. More lively, eye bags less prominent. You're happy it's the weekend, and he doesn't have to go into work. Being alone in his big apartment, unfamiliar city, and your brother's words gnawing at your mind isn't a great feeling. Spencer seems to suppress that feeling. You return his smile.

The two of you stay in your pajamas. You are in shorts and a t shirt while he's in flannel pj pants and a Star Wars shirt. His sleepy look makes you just want to mess up his short-ish hair even more. He really is super attractive. Of course, you had noticed before. How could you not? But there's something different now. Maybe something that you didn't notice before.

You're lying your head on Spencer's lap as he reads to you. You'd picked out a random book and asked him if he would. Something about his voice puts you at ease.

"People can die of pure imagination..." Spencer reads. The emotion in his voice as he reads each work of the book from the 14th century fills your ears. He makes sure to slow down a bit so you can understand what he's saying. Hearing him talk is just pleasant now, and you can't explain why.

He finishes the book not long after he began reading. You sigh, a bit sadden at him stopping. You'd started to almost fall asleep from the soothing sensation of him reading to you. Your eyes are closed as you lay on his lap, but your ears are alert and listening.

"You're so pretty," he says, putting the book away and look down at you.

You open your eyes, looking up at him. You smile, not able to stop a blush from creeping in on your cheeks. You've never truly been called pretty, just hot, sexy, feisty. All of those were from gross men you later on got rid of. Spencer seems like he truly means it. Does he actually like you?

"Thank you. You're not too shabby yourself.

He smiles. "I want to do something today."

"Like?"

"Maybe we could go to the cafe again and maybe go see a movie? Only if you want, but there's this showing of a film I've loved since I was a kid. It's super weird to other people... I like it…but like I said, only if you want."

You sit up. "Of course."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Why not?" Honestly, it doesn't sound completely horrible. You're doing really well at this whole nice thing. You're doing things he likes to help with the plan of making him fall for you. You think it's starting to work.

The two of you get dressed and head out the door. He drives to the cafe. You're wearing his jacket again which is long on you since he's so tall. It almost reaches the end of your dress. You decided to dress up a bit today; a black lazy dress that reaches mid thigh, black mostly see through tights, and high top converse.

Spencer's wearing a sweater with dark slim jeans and his famous purple converse. He only owns like 4 pairs of shoes, 3 of those being converse that he wears all the time. It's kind of cute how he doesn't care about things like fancy shoes or technology. His quirks add to his charm.

You guys talk while drinking coffee and eating sandwiches. People come in and out of the cafe, you two staying fairly long because you're caught in conversation. Spencer's talks a bit more about his past. His mother, his ex who didn't end well, and how his father left him. A part of you wants to know about his ex and what happened with that, but you don't ask specifics. You tell a few stories of your parents.

He asks where you went after their death. "A family adopted me and my brother. They were alright, but didn't really have a whole lot to do with us." Lying has become too easy for you.

After you finally decide to leave the place, Spencer takes you to the theaters. You have to park in some business parking lot and walk your way to the theater. He buys the tickets and some candy, then the two of you head into the room.

You can't follow along with the plot very well, but you understand enough. Spencer seems to be enjoying himself to the left of you. Occasionally, he leans over and whispers something about the film or the era to you. You don't particularly care about what he's saying, but you don't mind that he says it.

"Y/n, Y/n," Spencer taps your shoulder. "The movie's over."

"Oh shit. I fell asleep. I'm sorry, Spencer."

"It's okay," he smiles a bit. "Although the other people may not have liked your snoring."

"I do not snore!"

"Maybe a little," he smiles, licking his lips.

You punch his shoulder playfully. Spencer and you head outside and start the walk towards his car.

"So was this like a date?" You ask nonchalantly.

He clears his throat, not sure what to say for once in his life. "If you... If you want it to be one."

"Yeah," you say with a little smile. "It’s a date."

He grabs your hand and laces his fingers with yours. "A date," he repeats. You swing your arms back and forth and receive a laugh from Spencer.

You get back into his car and head back to his place.

"You know, most of the time I don't let a guy take me home on the first date." You joke.

He laughs a little nervously. "I’m just lucky I guess."

chapter twelve

tags: @reidsprettygirl @reidsmilf @reidslovely @awhoreforspencerreid @sexualityisajoke @nomajdetective @kenreadsfanfics @calicocatty @hotchandspencearedilfs @kodiakwhiskey @rory-cakes @444verse @kbakery @crynroom <3

[yarichin-imagines]

could you do like headcannons for yuri and tamura and how they express their love for their s/o? 🥺 either nsfw or sfw is good :))

Hi thank you so much for requesting! I wasn’t sure if you meant a poly relationship or separate, so I went with separate for right now! If you wanted something different, don’t hesitate to send in another ask!

Ayato Yuri 

Yuri, shockingly, is pretty hard to write for. I don’t think anyone really knows what is going on inside his head. So these headcannons are purely what I think. 

I would like to think he is the type to show his love for you rather than speak it. I love him to death but I know is not good with words by any means. Unless you know the full Yuri dictionary, then I don’t see how anyone can point out his verbal hints that he loves you.

Sweets! We all know that Yuri absolutely loves his sweets. After a while of getting to know you and dating you, he would figure out your favorite candy and or baked good. And every morning before school, he would hand you some so you can notch throughout the day. And on anniversaries, you’d find a whole package laying on your bed after class.

He would walk you to class every morning. Majority of the time, he would either sleep over at yours or have you sleep at his. But still, he makes a point to walk you to and from class. He just loves seeing you every moment he can.

He would look over your homework for you! Especially if you were struggling in a particular class. He would take it from you and disappear only to return with your paper. There would be red marks on the ones you got wrong and in the margins - you would see his sloppy handwriting with the right answer. He would also do the same thing with your tests once you got them back. It’s routine now that he expects to see your test every time. And he would do the same thing he did with your homework.

If you did good on a test, He’d definitely reward you with kisses and candy! His heart just swells in pride when you get a good grade that he can’t help but to cover you in kisses. 

If you are scared or even anxious during thunderstorms, he’d be the one to place his headphones over your ears and let you listen to his music. He’d hold his hands over your eyes so the only thing you could focus on was the songs coming through the headphones. I’m sure he has fears of his own or things that make him anxious so he knows how you feel.

He makes sure to always have dinner with you. He likes to make sure you’re eating well. Don’t let him cook though. Just don’t. While I think he is a decent cook, he’d probably manage to slip in some unwanted ingredients.

NSFW

He’d always show his love by going down on you several times in each session. He wants you to feel as good as you possibly can. He wants you in the clouds. Plus we all know how good he is with his tongue - even he knows how good he is with his tongue. This definitely leads to a lot of overstimulation.

Another way he’d show his love in the bedroom is by wearing protection with you in the beginning. Now hear me out. There’s a method to this madness. He has been with a lot of people. He knows he’s been with a lot of people. He doesn’t want to risk giving you anything. He cares about you too much and is too scared to risk it. But I know that when the two of you become closer and more committed, he’d stop using it. Although, if you are a person who could become pregnant and you wanted him to continue to use them, he would.

If you wanted him to, he’d stop having sex with other people. I am a firm believer that any relationship he goes into - it would be an open one. But if you sat him down and explained it to him, he would try and limit his partners and eventually stop altogether. But! If you do this, prepare to be railed about three times a day minimum. He has a really high sex drive hence why he had so many partners.

During sex, I think he would choose a lot of positions that would allow him to see your face and lets him be close to you. He wants to see you and feel you everywhere. When he’s with someone he loves, it’s almost like he wants to be enveloped by them. He begins to see them as home. So during sex, it’s natural he wants to have them wrapped around him. 

He’d take off his glasses during sex. Like above, he wants to see you. And he wants to do it without the tint hiding the way your body flushes in the setting sun that pours in through the window. He might even pin his bangs back so he could watch your reactions as he’s between your legs, making you see stars.

He would want you to look him in the eyes during the act. He shows a lot of his emotions with his eyes. The act of someone looking into your eyes is extremely intimate. You lay your emotions bare to him with your eyes. And he really appreciates it!

Yui Tamura

One of the ways he shows his love is through his physical strength. He would thrown down with anyone who tried you. And if anyone makes you cry? He’s beating them to a bloody pulp. He does it to protect you and your emotions. If you didn’t approve of him going around and beating up anyone who makes you feel slightly upset, you’d have to sit him down and explain why and that he has to stop. But for you, he would.

As I explained in another Tamura post, he loves the sunset. And he would love to watch them with you. He’d take you to the best viewing spot and sit with you wrapped in his arms as the two of you watch the colors fade to night.

He’d skip class with you to go on dates. He’d casually stroll into your math class and say the office needed to see you and that you were excused for the rest of that class. Once outside the class, he’d take your hand in his and run out of the building to a quiet place. He’d take you under the stands near the soccer field where he set up a small intimate date. He’d have all of your favorite snacks and he’d demand to feed them to you.

Unlike Yuri, Tamura would voice a lot of his love for you too. While it may not be a direct “I love you”, it’s in the questions he asks. “Have you eaten today?”, “Did you sleep well last night?”. 

He’d also remind you of a lot of stuff. If it was going to be particularly cold the next day, he’d remind you to set out your coat and gloves. If it was midterms, he’d remind you to drink enough water and not stay up all night studying. 

He’d randomly pop up to your dorm during one of your study sessions with a meal from the cafeteria because he knew you wouldn’t set a reminder to go grab it. As he sets it down, he’d definitely gently knock you in the back of the head for not remembering to eat.

He would be one of the ones to verbally say he loves you. If you were stressed about anything, he’d remind you that even though it feels like the world is against you, he’s there for you. “You know I love you right? Then relax and let yourself go - even for a minute.”

NSFW

Not to beat the dead horse, but he’d cover you in marks. When it comes to sex, I see Tamura being like a basic alpha male. He wants everyone to know you’re his. It gives him a sense of security. He loves you so much that seeing you covered in his love bites does things to him. When he sees them the next morning, he might have to pull you into the nearest closet or classroom and relive the previous night.

He would take things a lot slower when it came to sex. It would be a lot more intimate. With most of his other partners, there was no intimacy. Once they were done, they would just go their separate ways. But with you, he would keep you as close as possible.

The aftercare would be amazing. He’d pull you to his chest and kiss your face, asking if you needed anything. He’d massage the tense muscles if he needed to. He would use one of his old shirts to clean you up before hopping back into bed to just lay with you. In the afterglow when the room was silent all except for your breaths, he’d feel at peace with himself.

His dirty talk wouldn’t be as rough. Instead of the normal explicit words, he’d say things along the lines of “you feel so fucking good around me” or “you’re so good to me”. And of course the classic, “I love you so fucking much”. If you wanted him to be a bit more rough with his words, he will. But for the most part, he’d be more romantic with it.

When he cares for his partner, he learns to give more than receive. He would put your pleasure above his own. He would make sure that you are always the first to come. He puts more of his effort and time into your pleasure rather than his own. He would ask what you like in order to make you happy. He would even show vulnerability and let you tell him where he is lacking in certain areas of sex.

He’d kiss you a lot! Kissing is something that is very intimate to some within the walls of sex. When he has you on your back and is thrusting into you slowly, his lips would be on yours, pressing his tongue deeper into your mouth with every slow drag of his hips. His bedroom persona would drastically change when he finds someone he loves and cares for.

I hope you enjoyed! I’m sorry if these are really sappy! I put on a slow Japanese playlist and a lot of the songs happen to be love ballads. Again, thank you so much for requesting! 

- Admin Pinky

[haechanokeh]

I’m right for you [pt. 3]

[teaser] [ Chapter 1 ] [ Chapter 2 ]

(you can play Die For You by The Weeknd while reading this 😌)

pairing: popular college! mark x average! reader

genre: romance, smut, angst, series.

warning: corruption, oral sex (both receiving and giving), cream pie, rough sex, mention of religion, rough sex, self-esteem, psychology, public sex, sub! reader, sex toys. possessive mark two-faced mark

I think I’m right for you, babe. You know what I’m thinking, see it in your eyes. You hate that you want me, hate it when you cry. It ain’t workin’ ‘cause you’re perfect and I know that you’re worth it I can’t walk away. (Die for you by The Weeknd)

today is you case presentation with mark. you were deeply affected of what happened in the cubicle but mark seemed unbothered because he was greeting you as usual. it wasn’t weird, he always greets everyone but what was really weird was your classmates. they were looking at you and it made you felt conscious, they were not saying anything but sometimes you catch them glancing at you but you brushed it off and focus on your brainstorming with mark.

yes you do dislike mark but you thank god that he's your partner. he never missed a question from your professor during case study on the other hand you're just standing beside him dumbly. you only understand the question AND the answer once mark responded. well, mark a very kind person he was, despite of answering it alone he made sure that you're included in the case saying base in y/n and my research, even lied that some are from my own research but of course not. plus, for some odd reason, your classmates' eyes were literally made you uncomfortable to the point you were having a hard time to breathe or your social anxiety attacking you. however, at the very moment, you want to give mark a tight hug for making your life easy.

the whole presentation ended. you were putting your things back to your back while standing while mark scrolling in his phone because his dad texted him asking if he could buy him some new pen. you gasped when an arm was on your shoulder, and that caught mark's attention but he hid his annoyance. 

"hey, y/n, i heard you like someone ha?" his brows were playfully raising. it was lucas, he gave mark a meaningful glance but mark smiled confusingly.

"what?" you didn't have any idea what he's telling you. 

"i heard someone saw-"

"mark!" mina suddenly appeared calling mark's name a little too loud which made lucas stop from talking. "we're going to a milk tea house, do you want to come with us?"

“y/n, come with us.” lucas pulled you closer to his body. mark was taring at lucas arm around your shoulder. you weren’t aware of mark’s expression because your mind was thinking ways to breakthrough from lucas. 

“no!” mina exclaimed. he caught everyone’s attention, and she became flustered. “i mean, we will only make her feel uncomfortable and lucas please remove your arms to y/n, she doesn’t look comfortable.” she mumbled. lucas did remove his arms from you. 

“milk tea? can we also come with you?” then the people started to surround mark. it became noisy, knowing you who’s allergic to people and noise sneaked out from the circle and left the room.

mark turned his head to look at you but you’re nowhere to be found. he sighed and forced himself to interact with his classmates.

your mother texted you that he will be away for one week because of their excursion. she left you an allowance good for one week including your meals for the whole day and transportation. you already had your dinner outside. right now you were just laying down on your favorite long sofa in your living room, watching NCT 2020 funny moments. suddenly, mark's name popped. mark is your class representative, he has access to class contacts and it wasn't that mark called you because you're always late in the class so for almost past 3 years he's the one you always contact just to inform the class that you're just late. 

wait, did i miss an announcement? you quickly left the class maybe something came up.

"hello, was there an announcement?" you directly asked

"none, just checking you. we haven't had a proper conversation awhile ago unless it's case related." 

you heart melted, he's very kind and sweet... that scares you.

"ah okay." you simply answered. it wasn't because you want to talk to him, well you really don't want to talk to him but it wasn't that he's annoying or anything- it was just you hate phone calls. you hate talking with someone in general unless it's your mom. 

"well, have you eaten yet?" he tried to save the conversation, he wanted to hear your voice longer.

"yes." it was a one-word reply. 

mark was slightly shattered because you don't seem to want to talk to him. he just thought that maybe you were tired.

"okay, goodnight."

"yeah." then you hang up. 

you returned watching youtube until you drifted into your dreamland... no it wasn't your dreamland.

you gasped and sat up as you woke from another perverted dream with mark. your chest was rising aggressively and you look down as you felt the wetness between your thighs. you raked your hands over your hair as you felt frustration and guilt. this was your second time that you dreamt of mark doing erotic things. you looked at the digital clock it was already 2 am. you groaned and stood up, you want to wash your body because the stickiness just made you feel more guilty if it stays there longer.

you entered your room and stripped, walking directly into your bathroom. you opened a warm shower and as the water trickled on your body, hands unconsciously trailing to the south. your dream was so hot, you can't lie about that. it was in the same cubicle but instead of his digits, it was his dick inside you. 

your eyes closed as you rubbed your bead slow while recalling your dream. you squeezed your left breast and imagining it was mark's squeezing it. you want something to fill your womanhood so you inserted your two fingers and thrust it. your lungs felt like being suppressed by pressure, your thrust became furious. 

"oh my- mark fuck." you moaned his name and you have never been so ashamed. it was so wrong but the feeling was so good that you weren't able to stop yourself from moaning. you felt the tension in your thighs. you knelt down and the hand that squeezing your breast was now on your clit rubbing it furiously. 

"mark! fuck right there." you felt the tension in your abdomen and your legs started to shake. your body just gave in, bending down, cheek shoved against the wet tiles while the warm water splashed on your body.

you screamed erotically, eyes rolling and lashes flickering. your legs were shaking as you reached your high.

 mark hasn't slept yet, it's okay for him because there are no classes. he was staring at the ceiling and mind preoccupied by you.

he was trying to understand why do you keep pushing him away even though you clearly wanted him too. mark did remember where you say he's very different from you, and so? what's wrong with it? what he didn't like is the thought of changing just for a single person but...

"shall i?" he chuckled bitterly. he was really close to his insanity. he feared that this affection will grow into something that is uncontrollable- like an obsession.  

he checked the time through his phone. it's 5 in the morning. he decided to jog outside, so, he took a quick shower and wore his tracksuit and running shoes. maybe if tiredness hits him, he will feel sleepy. mark already went to your house and he didn't tell you that his house is just a few blocks away from you, instead of going to his normal route, he changed it, jogging in your house direction.

when he was closed to your street, he was surprised to see you outside. he stood and admire your naturalness from afar. your hair was disheveled, your eyes weren't completely closed yet, and your face was a little puffy but it doesn't take away your beauty. plus, your cute teddy bear pajamas made him smile. he sends his gratitude to god because he created a masterpiece. 

yeah, mark is deeply in love and he thinks there's no way out of this feeling. 

you were actually waiting for your breakfast, your pancakes from mcdonalds and a warm chocolate drink. when the delivery arrived, you paid and gave him a tip for being quick. you were about to go back inside when you heard a VERY familiar voice which was owned by the person who sleep deprived you 

"Y/N!" his voice was loud, it even cracked. 

"what are you doing here?" you asked.

"morning jog, and good morning to you." he replied and greeted at the same time.

"jog.." you paused and gasped. "from your condo to here?!" you exclaimed in disbelief. mark laughed at your reaction. of course it'll shock you because you already been in his condo and if he jogged it from there to here, he was supposed to be passing out right now.

"no, my family house is actually a few blocks away from here."  he said.

WHAT?! this is not good. you thought. the more he gets closer the more he has access to your mind and body. you masked your displeased face and just nodded.

"okay, ahm. i'm heading back now. bye." you pointed at your house door and awkwardly turned your back walking towards your door.

you expected him to do something because he always do that but to your disappointment he didn't. you looked back to check if he was stil there but he was no longer standing there but you saw him jogging away from your direction. you sighed in disappoinment that made you mentally slap yourself for feeling very contradicting .

you ate miserably your affordable and favorite pancake.

mark took a bathe and go down to eat breakfast together with his parents. they prayed before eating. the cooked food by his mom made him question why your ordered delivery food for breakfast.

"how's school?" mark's dad asked him.

"good, still the same." he replied.

"your father will lead a service, you can invite your classmates. oh mina, you can invite her, she's very sweet girl." his mom said but she doesn't have any motive. she knew mark have not interest in romantic relationship as of the moment, her child was so focus in maintaining his grades and scholarship. at least, that's what he though.. if she only knew.

"i'll try." he forced a smile but behind it was growing tiredness. he knew that his classmates doesn't really want to praise but because they were so fond of mark and they just love to hang out. it defeated the purpose of going to church.

after the breakfast, mark's parent left for their work. he washed the dishes and went up stairs and stayed in his room with his music and guitar. it helped to detach his mind from thinking of you, but it was just temporary as he saw you name appeared in his phone. he almost threw his guitar just to answer your call very quick.

"y/n? why?" he sound so excited.

"ahm, mark... well.. perhaps, do you ahm, have notes from yesterdays discussion? i mean in all cases, not just ours?" you were very stuttering because of shyness. your class have long test about the cases but you're notes are everywhere and you can't understand your writings.

"yes." he said. he knew where this is going. he quickly get out from his bed and go straight to his closet, choosing shirt to wear. "do you need it? i can bring it to you."

"no, no. ahm, you do digital notes right? mind if you could send it through gdrive?" you really don't want to bother him... nah lies. you're just preventing things from happening.

mark paused for a moment and was a little hurt, he understood your statement as if you don't want to see him. but mark will not having any of that.

"it was handwritten though." he faked sorry. he hoped you didn't notice what he did there, hoping that you received it as if it was literally handwritten like directly to paper since he sounded apologetic.

"oh... i see. well, ahm, can you drop by in the house?"

mark still not satisfied by just dropping by.

"how about we study together? we can review together."

you translated it like 'the smartest in your class can help you'and that's very tempting. you can't easily study 8 cases and you need him. you used his diuretics notes in lecture, you almost aced it. now, your lab needs him.

"then, pizza is okay for you?" you whisoered from the other end.

mark secretly fist pump and grinned in triumph.

"yes."

you spayed air freshener in your living room and changed your shirt to another shirt? you only have tees just in different colors, you changed your short into black sweatpants. you made sure that your hair was far different from the hair he saw this morning. you already ordered the pizza.

the doorbell rang. your quickly opened the door for him. mark was standing, carrying his ipad and his other hand holding a two milk teas in a cup holder. he's wearing dark blue t-shirt and gray sweatpants. you smiled awkwardly and let him in. you scanned his body, looking for paper or at least a piece of paper but you didn't see any of it. mark was looking down at you, watching you observing him.

"where's your notes?" you curiously asked.

"here." he lifted his ipad. your jaw dropped.

"i thought you did not do digital notes?"

"i don't recalling telling you i didn't, i just said it was handwritten and when i saif that handwritten in my ipad." he reasoned. taht made you think later realizing that he was right and that made you dumb.

you sighed in defeat.

"by the way, bought you milk tea since you missed it yesterday." he said, you acually don't care if you missed it or not.

you walked towards the single couch and patted it.

"you can seat here." you said.

he quickly sat down and put the milk teas on top of your living room's table. he confusingly watched you when you sat on the long couch and it was the end of it. you were too far from him.

you noticed his sulking face.

"mr. mark lee, what's with your long face?" you chuckled teasingly.

"why are you too far from me?" he pouted.

"damage control." you replied shortly and get your case 3 notes which is very illegible to read. "can i borrow your case 3?"

"why? what did i do?" mark asked was clueless. he did not pay attention to your question

"mark, being alone with you is not healthy anymore." you directly answered him.

"orgasm is healthy, what do you mean?" mark didn't get your.

"mark, that's not what i mean. we're like horny teenagers doing unappropriate things."

"we're already passed in that phase in life, we're both adults." he rebutted.

you mentally face palmed yourself in frustration. why is he so smart and dumb at the same time.

"mark, that's not why i mean. we're being to touchy, every time we are left alone the next thing we knew we're touching each other. do you know how scary was that to me? it only happened twice but i am already longing for more! when i don't feel your touches i go craaazy! i even touched myself for freaking 2-" you froze when you realize what you were telling him you stared blankly at him.

on the other hand, mark was very pleased hearing you exploded from frustration as you became honest for the first time.

"you touched yourself? what 2?" he smirked and lifted his brows.

you cleared your throat.

"can i borrow your ipad? i need your case 3." you murmured and look anywhere but him your face heat up. you want to be swallowed by your favorite sofa.

"then get it."

you look at his ipad sitting on his manly wide spread apart thighs. your eyes stared at the mark that makes your knees weak and wet pussy. his fiery eyes looking directly toyou while he was sitting comfortably on the couch and arms are both in each side of the armrest.

"mark lee, i need it." you tried to use your stern voice but failed because your voice was too small.

"i told you, you can get it.. here." he glanced at his ipad.

you gulped and the living room's air became thick. your submissive self switched on and you just found yourself walking towards him. your hands felt cold as you reached for his ipad. when you lifted it, his bulge forming in his gray sweatpants made you almost drool. you were reminded how fucking hot it was.

you want to touch it and do anything you can possibly could but your single rational braincells keeping you in the light.

"you don't seem sure of what you really wanted to do." he snapped you from overthinking. "should i make you choices?"

"what?" you asked confusingly but your voice was shaking.

"you bring that ipad with you and go back to where you were sitting, or..." he looked up to you with his dark eyes, leaning a little forward you trace the side of your hips with his palm..

"put the ipad on the table and sit in my lap."

mark knew that you can never say no at this state. if you could only see how your body shivered and how defeated your face was, he knew you already gave in.

and his was right.

the original draft was deleted because of my stupidity 😭 idk think this is good as the original draft.

hello, some of you asked me if i have a tag list, i will be creating one.

✨if you want to be added in I'm Right For You Tag List, you can DM or Ask me so i can add you ✨

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Tag List:

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anyways, i would like to say thank you for supporting this story. i did not expect some of you will like it. i also want to thanks people who leaving message through dms and ask praising this story. also to those nctzens hearting it 🥺🤗

[dialovers-translations]

DIABOLIK LOVERS VERSUS SONG Bloody Night Vol.Ⅱ Mini Drama “Ruki VS Azusa”

Original title: 録り下ろしミニドラマ ｢ルキVSアズサ｣

Source: Diabolik Lovers VERSUS SONG Bloody Night Vol.II Mini Drama [CD not owned by me]

Audio: Here

Seiyuu: Takagi Sakurai & Daisuke Kishio

Translator’s note: I believe this is the first time I have translated some sort of VERSUS track featuring two Mukami’s and it does have a totally different feel to it, as to be expected. Even though there is still an obvious competition between the two, they aren’t nearly as hostile towards each other, even relying on the other or allowing their ‘brother’ to join in. This sibling bond between the Mukami’s is honestly what I like best about them and I’m glad it shows in this CD!

→  LIKE MY TRANSLATIONS? SUPPORT ME ON KO-FI!

*Chop chop chop*

Azusa: Eve...What are you doing...?

You squeak.

Azusa: Ah...I’m sorry for scaring you...

You explain.

Azusa: You’re making...dinner? Hmー

Azusa paces around you.

Azusa: Hm...What’s on the menu for today? You chopped up...a bunch of vegetables, huh? 

*Rustle*

Azusa: Ah! That knife...It cuts extremely well, doesn’t it? I sharpened it...the other day. So I’d be able to cut...even the hardest materials...You see? I’m sure it could even...slice through bones and flesh with ease...Fufufu~ 

Your face goes pale.

Azusa: Want to...put it to the test? No, you want to try it out, right? I can tell as well, Eve...

*Rustle*

Azusa: Say...Try it on me? Right here, please?

You refuse.

Azusa: Justin, you see...He’s about to fade away. So...Please? Cut me here? ...Come on. You want to, don’t you?

You shake your head.

Azusa: ...Why not? Why would you say no? That’s strange. We should be...two of the same kind though...Ah! That’s wrong. You want it first, don’t you? I see. Of course you would.

He suddenly pins you down.

*Thud*

Azusa: Haah...I’m sorry for not realizing sooner. To make it up to you, I’ll make it...especially painful, okay? Fufufu~ I hope that’ll make you happy~

*Cling*

You start struggling. 

Azusa: It’ll be...okay...Just leave it...up to me...Ugh...

*Shatter*

Azusa: Ugh...Nn...Keep still...Eve...Come on...You can’t do that...Ugh!

*Thud*

Azusa: Haah...Fufu~ Like this, you can no longer move, can you? Ooh...But I can no longer use the knife like this...Hm...What to do...? Ah! Right!

He leans in close.

Azusa: Instead, I’ll give you this pain...which you’ve loved for so long...Haahn...

Azusa bites you.

*Sluuuurp*

*Gulp*

Azusa: Nn...Haah...Delicious...Eve’s blood...I wonder if it’s because...you enjoy pain...?

*Sluuuurp*

Azusa: In that case...I’ll make it hurt even more, okay? By doing so...You get to feel even better...and I get to...savor more of your...delicious blood...It’s basically a two-for-one deal (1), right...? Fufu~

*Rustle rustle*

Azusa: Haah...Well then, this place is up next...Your ear...

He bites you again.

Azusa: ...Hm? Mm...What’s wrong, Eve? Don’t look at me...like that. Rest...asssured. I’ll make sure to give you pain...just like you wish...Not from your earlobe but...right here...if I suck from the upper part...I’m sure it’ll hurt. 

Your eyes widen in horror. 

Azusa: Come on...Relax. Then my fangs can...sink into you and...give you pain...from inside...

*Sluuuurp*

Azusa: Nn...Hah...

*Sluuuurp*

Azusa: Mm...

*Shatter*

Azusa: Haah...Nn...Mmh...Haah, haah...Seeing you have a hard time...Somehow made me feel good too...Fufu...Fufufu~ It looks as if I almost punctured a hole through your ear...In that case...Let’s put a pretty accessory in here. To symbolize that...I was the one who pierced these...Shall we give it a name too? Like Justin and Christina...Say? Don’t you like the sound of that? Fufufu~ 

*Rustle*

Azusa: Haahn...Mmh...

*Sluuuurp*

*Gulp*

Azusa: Mmh...Nn...

*Sluuuurp*

Azusa: Haah...It’s my turn next, okay...? 

Azusa moves away.

Azusa: Come on, hurt me with this knife...Give me a new kind of pain...I’m begging you.

*Cling*

Azusa: ...Eve? What’s wrong? Hm...Come on, stand...

Ruki enters the kitchen.

Ruki: It has been awfully rowdy in here. What are you doing?

Azusa: Oh...Ruki.

He walks over.

Ruki: Haah...Care explain this to me? Livestock, explain. I should have ordered you to prepare our dinner? 

You frown.

Ruki: From the looks of it, rather than actually preparing the food, all you did was make a mess of our kitchen. You truly are hopeless. Can you not even prepare a single meal without messing up? Haah...Show me your hands.

You hesitate.

Ruki: Show me your hands, I said!

You present him your hands.

Ruki: This is your punishment.

*SMACK*

Azusa: Ah! Wait, Ruki...I’m the one one who...!

*SMACK*

Azusa: Ugh...Ah...

Ruki: Azusa, do not interfere.

Azusa: I’m the one...who got in the way of her cooking so punish me too...

Ruki: Cannot do. You simply want to feel the pain, no?

Azusa: Oh...

Ruki: Regardless of the circumstances, the fact she ignored the orders given by her master remains unchanged. I need to punish her. Azusa. You restrain her, okay?

Azusa: ...Eh?

Ruki: Hurry up.

Azusa: Understood...

Azusa keeps your arms behind your back.

*Rustle*

Azusa: Keep still, okay? Eve...

Ruki: That works. Livestock, I shall tame you right now. You should be grateful. Hmph.

You shiver in fear.

Ruki: Good grief...I can’t believe you would ignore your duties behind your Master’s back, only to indulge in your own selfish pleasures. You are quite the livestock. ...Hm? Are these fang marks Azusa’s? In that case, to start things off, I shall suck from this nape...

*Rustle*

Ruki: Mmh...Nn...

*Rustle rustle*

Ruki: Don’t move. It makes it hard to suck.

*Sluuurp*

You continue writhing around. 

Ruki: Tsk. Livestock. I told you to keep still! ...Azusa, keep her in check.

Azusa: Mmh...

Ruki: I cannot believe you can’t even simply stand still and keep quiet...

*RIIIIIP*

Ruki: Seems like I will have to be a little more strict with my training. To ensure your body actually remembers. You can decide where I shall punish you next. Your throat? Or perhaps, your shoulder? Come on, choose. 

You keep quiet.

Ruki: Good grief...To think you are this foolish, it almost seems refreshing. Show me your hands one more time. Hurry up.

*Rustle*

Ruki: Hmph. The whip has left clear marks behind. I’m sure it must sting painfully? 

You nod.

Ruki: In that case...I shall add onto said pain even more. Like this...

*Rustle*

Ruki bites your hand. 

*Sluuuurp*

Ruki: Mmh...Hah...Fufu...Those are lovely sounds...Cry out more!

You collapse but Azusa catches you in his arms.

*Rustle*

Azusa: ...Oh! Eve...? Are you okay...? I wonder if it simply felt too good...? Hey.

Ruki: Oi. 

*Smack*

Ruki: Wake up. ...You’re gravely mistaken if you think your punishment ends here. Oi, Azusa. You join in too.

Azusa: Ah...Are you sure?

Ruki: Hmph. It’d be more effective if the two of us discipline her simultaneously. Help me out.

Azusa: Mmh...Gotcha. Eve...This time...I’ll give you pain too...Are you happy? No...You obviously are, aren’t you? 

Ruki: You should accept your penalty, admitting to the crime you have committed towards your Master.

Azusa: In that case...I’ll go for this...shoulder. You like it here, Eve...Don’t you?

Ruki: Fufufu...Try your best to remain conscious, okay?

Azusa bites your shoulder.

Azusa: Mmh...

*Sluuurp*

Azusa: Nn...Ah...

*Rustle*

Azusa: Eve...? Does it feel good? ...You ahead...You can lean against me more...By doing so...My fangs can sink in...even deeper.

Ruki: Livestock. Open your eyes. Watch closely. At these wedges (2) piercing through your own wrist. 

Ruki bites her as well.

*Sluuuurp*

Azusa: Eve...Feel my fangs too...

*Sluuuurp*

*Gulp*

Azusa: Mmh...Ah...You want...more and more...right? This shouldn’t be...nearly enough to satisfy you...

Ruki: Azusa...Give it to her harder, and deeper. Despite her cries, that’s what this woman desires. I can tell.

Azusa: Mmh. I know. ...I’ll give it you as you wish, okay? After all...Eve’s desire...is my desire as well...Haahn...

*Sluuuurp*

Azusa: Nn...

Ruki: Your sweet blood is spreading inside my mouth...Mmh...You sure know how to entice a man. 

*Sluuuurp*

Azusa: Haah...Hah...Eve...You’re so pretty...Dyed in this deep crimson blood...Mmh.

*Smooch*

Azusa: See? My lips are bright red too, aren’t they? Fufufu~ We match~

*Rustle rustle*

Azusa: Ah...It’s okay...Don’t worry about getting dirty?

*Rustle*

Azusa: Oh...You’ve got bite marks all over you...I bet it hurts a lot...Mmh. Oh. I suppose I shouldn’t be too rough with you, right? 

Ruki: Oi, Azusa. She’s a nosy woman, but it’d be troublesome if she becomes unable of saying anything. 

Azusa: Mmh. I know. 

*Rustle rustle*

Azusa: I’ll be careful, okay?

*Rustle*

Ruki: Well then...Next up, I’ll do it from behind like this. Let me engrave a pentalty into your nape. Haha...Have you even lost the energy to muster up a response? Good grief...You really always crave to be punished, don’t you? Being too greedy is problematic as well.

Azusa: Hey, Eve...Look at me...Okay? You’ve been looking at...Ruki this whole time, haven’t you? I have the right to make you mine as well...So...Please? I’ll give you...more and more pain...See? Like this...

*Sluuuurp*

Azusa: Mmh...

*Sluuuurp*

Azusa: Nn...Mmh...

Ruki: Do not let Azusa’s words sway you. In the end, you are still my livestock. I am the one you should prioritize. 

Azusa: ...I won’t lose either, Ruki!

Ruki: As you wish. Fufufu...

Azusa: Say, Eve? We are two of the same kind. Therefore...I will give you everything...your heart desires...

Ruki: Heh. Aren’t you rather desperate, Azusa? It is rather uncommon for you to get this worked up. 

Azusa: Because she is the one thing...I don’t want to hand over, not even to you...That’s why...

Ruki: Heh. I see. In that case, I shouldn’t sit still either. ...Oi, Livestock. Drown in me more. Mmh...Nn...

Azusa: Me too...! ...Hey, Eve? You can...have high hopes, okay? Mmh...

*Sluuuurp*

Azusa: Mmn...Nn...

Ruki: I am sure this situation is all you’ve ever dreamt of, isn’t it? Well, go ahead and enjoy it to the fullest. After all, you are a woman who feels joy from being pinned down. We still have plenty of time. I shall show you a kind of pleasure you have yet to ever experience.

Azusa: Eve...I will give it my all as well...Until you are thoroughly satisfied, okay?

Ruki: Hahaha...You are in luck. Seems like your punishment is still far from over.

The door closes.

*Creaaaak*

*Thud*

��ー THE END ーー

Translation notes

(1) Azusa uses the expression いいことづくし or ‘ii-koto-zukushi’ which literally means ‘all sorts of good things/joyful happenings’. 

(2) I’m not sure why Ruki refers to his fangs as 楔 or ‘kusabi’ (wedge) here but I suppose they have a somewhat similar shape.

[kim-bobbae]

54. “I made reservations.”

I miss him so much and I hope he’s resting up, I just want to take care of him and be his comfort person TT

“To be really honest, I have no idea what he’s busy with until I see a recording or photoshoot of his on my schedule, and then I’m summoned to do his hair and makeup,” You laughed. “At this point I think it’s a relief he renewed his contract with AOMG instead of signing with H1GHR, don’t you think?” 

“I’m right, he really is the dad that’s never home,” Wonjae chuckled, tugging lower on his beanie. 

You were in the car on the way back to the AOMG headquarters after Wonjae’s photoshoot where Pumkin had dropped by in support since it was his first ever solo shoot for W magazine when the topic of Jay came about as you guys discussed the responses received from the interview they had done that was uploaded just a few days ago. With how busy Jay had been and how rare it was to see him around at the AOMG headquarters, their questions on what he had been up to very naturally fell on you because who else would know better if not for his girlfriend, right? 

Wrong. You had absolutely no idea either. 

Yes, there was the H1GHR compilation – you knew that much – but so did everyone else. The fact that you didn’t know much more than that surprised them, to say the least. 

“Do you want me to nag at him a little and drop him a hint or two? I could do that,” Pumkin offered. 

“Oh please no, I don’t think he’ll be too pleased if he finds out I’m whining about him to you guys behind his back.” 

“Not exactly, we’re the ones asking you about him,” Wonjae rebutted. 

“Yeah, when was the last time you guys went on a date?” Pumkin asked. “Don’t count the ones where you guys order delivery from the office or his studio, those aren’t counted.” 

“Why not? Those are dates…” 

“I see where the problem lies now,” Wonjae snickered. 

“C’mon, you guys are making this a bigger deal than it actually is,” You remarked. “We’ve been dating for years now, we’re past that.” 

A few days passed since then with nothing really out of the ordinary except for a dinner with your friends that you’ve managed to fit into your schedule after clearing an important deadline. With a couple of music releases coming up, you were attending meetings with different artists, talking to them about their ideas and concepts, proposing hairstyles, make up and clothing that would be suitable for their music videos and teaser images. 

While the job did sound manageable, the very act of browsing endless collections of the latest fashion releases was extremely time consuming, and squeezing in a short conversation or two with Jay via text message was, in fact, pretty much the norm these days with the both of you being so busy. Not that you minded – you just got used to it. 

And so did he. 

You understood though, really. You understood that he was a busy man and while you were important to him, he simply could not afford to put you in the center of his world. But he tried, and he did all he could to show you that. Yet, with that workaholic nature of his and all the people he had to put on for, work would always be his priority. 

It was just hard facing up to it last week when you tried your luck at getting some affection by cuddling up to him while he was reviewing some tracks during the ten minute window that the both of you were left alone in the studio – you couldn’t help it, it’s been a whole month (!!!) – only to earn a ‘I’m working, babe’ in a tone you don’t usually appreciate. He apologized, of course, realizing that he had hurt your feelings from the way you retreated quietly to another room, but it did enough to keep you from attempting it again for the remainder of the week. 

“Dinner tonight?” 

A message notification flashed across your screen. It was Jay. 

You didn’t think much of it though and readily agreed to it. For a split second, you wondered if Pumkin had a part to play in this and the smirk on his face as the receptionist walked in to the office towards you with a bouquet of roses in hand only confirmed your suspicions. 

“Looks like someone sent you flowers,” She said, handing it to you. 

Now Jay wasn’t really one who’d be into these flashy, romantic gestures, especially in front of his employees, and the number of heads that turned towards your direction with knowing smiles on their faces made you understand exactly why. 

Take a longer lunch break to get ready if you need to, I’ll be at the office at 7pm to pick you up.

You raised a brow at the formalities as you read the message on the card. Having been together for years, being on the receiving end of this somewhat grand gesture all of a sudden needed some getting use to again but with everyone’s attention on you and the extremely elaborate bouquet, you quickly set is aside, an embarrassed smile the best you could muster in response to their reactions before you got back to work. 

Consumed by your pile of work, you had completely lost track of time since then but it wasn’t hard to tell that it was already 7pm from the way your colleagues peeped curiously from behind their desk dividers, stifling their excited giggles and from their reaction you could already guess that Jay was here. It wasn’t every day that they could catch a glimpse of their boss’s love life, after all. 

“Ready to go?” He asked, and what ensued was a moment of confusion the second you turned around to face him. 

He was all cleaned up in a black tee shirt and dress pants, hair styled back and you were pretty sure those were some new shoes from his two hundred deep sneaker collection while there you were, in a pair of skinny jeans and oversized sweater and it was obvious that you guys weren’t dressed for the same occasion. 

You hesitated, “…last minute schedule to attend to?”

“No…I’m taking you for dinner?” He mused, gesturing to the flowers. “I made reservations.” 

“Yeah but…you didn’t tell me that I had to get dressed up,” You replied sheepishly. 

“I did,” He laughed. “You just didn’t take me seriously.” 

“You said ‘if you need to’,” You argued in a hush whisper. “Plus, the last time you picked me up we had tacos at the diner just down the street.” 

For a while he stared at you, and so did everyone else and in all honesty, it was getting slightly embarrassing by now. Thankfully, Jay caught on your discomfort from the way you played with your fingers and bit on your lips as you waited for his reply. 

“It’s okay, we’ll sort this out,” He reassured in a soft voice, grabbing the bouquet in one hand and yours in the other. “Let’s go.” 

“Where are we going…?” You asked once the both of you were in the car. 

The fact that one of his managers wasn’t driving you guys and that he was instead driving his Bentley for the first time in ages did explain something about what he had planned but for now, everything about this made you nervous. This was so unlike him – excluding the first year of your relationship, that is. 

“We’re going to your favorite Italian restaurant,” He explained. “But I guess we should drop by your place to get you dressed up first, huh?” 

“Sorry about that,” You murmured, and he couldn’t help but titter at the way you stared down at your outfit with a sigh. 

You wasted no time and tossed your bag aside upon reaching home, making a beeline towards your wardrobe and immediately started sieving through your dresses. Despite the rough start, you had to admit that this was rather exciting. Heck, you couldn’t even remember the last time the both of you had a proper date night and the fact that he had taken the time to plan this amidst his schedule? Damn you were about to dress the hell up. 

You hastily put on the dress that you had picked out, a fairly new one from the few that you had saved up for rare occasions like these, then scurried to the living room where Jay was waiting. 

However, the sight of Jay burying his face in his hands looking absolutely worn had you somewhat stopping in your tracks. 

He was seated on the couch, leaning forward with his elbows resting on his lap as he squinted at his cracked phone screen. His brows furrowed as he tapped away at what sounded like a new message notification, then brought his phone up to his ears as he listened to what probably was a demo of one of the tracks off the album. Sure, he was dressed up, absolutely stunning, but how stressed he looked was definitely not a good look on him and at this point you weren’t sure how you’d feel about dinner if his mind was going to be miles away, back in his studio. 

“Wow,” He beamed upon noticing you then set his phone aside as he stood up. “You look beautiful.” 

“I could say the same for you, too.” 

“You okay?” He asked, cocking his head upon noticing that you seemed to be distracted in thought. 

“Yeah, of course.” 

“Come here, let me help you with that,” He smiled, noticing that the back of your dress was unzipped. 

But as he placed his hand on the zipper, you reached around to tug on his fingers, then turned around to face him. 

“What’s wrong?” 

“Why don’t…we just have dinner at home today?” You suggested, observing his reaction carefully. 

“Why the sudden change of mind...?” 

“I don’t know,” You sighed. “I mean, you seem really caught up with work, and I love that you took the time to plan a date, but I’m not sure if I can sit through that pretending that I am not seeing for myself how exhausted you are.” 

“No, no it’s fine,” He insisted. “I’m taking the night off to spend it with you.” 

The both of you glanced at his phone as it beeped again and then back at each other, and you could almost tell how he was already itching to respond to it. 

“I’ll cook us dinner, and we can postpone this date until after the album is released,” You told him. 

He looked at you, not quite sure if he was allowed to give in to you, especially after the little episode in his studio last week that had also been due to his work. 

“I’m not mad, I promise,” You giggled, reading him like a book. “Let’s stay in tonight.” 

“Are you sure?” 

“Yeah, go get your MacBook from the car and carry on with your work while I cook but all I ask for though...” You started. “Is for your undivided attention after that. I’ll cook a stew if it gives you more time.” 

He exhaled deeply, taking a step towards you and pulled you in for a long embrace, “How do you always manage to make me feel better even though I’m the one who screwed up?” 

“You didn’t screw up,” You said, wrapping your arms around his broad frame. “You tried, and I appreciate that.” 

“That makes me feel worse...” He replied, cupping your face and stroking your left cheek with his thumb.

You leaned into his touch, smiling, “It’s no big deal, this is just one of your busy phases. Once the album’s released, I’ll have my boyfriend back. Easy.” 

“I’ll make up for it, alright? I promise,” He said, then leaned in to kiss you sweetly. 

“Seems like the only way to get kisses nowadays is to let you work, huh?” You taunted. 

“Baby…” He whined, the littlest pout creeping to his lips. “Let’s not go back there.” 

“I was kidding,” You sniggered. “Now give me another one to shut me up.”

[heyitmelexie]

Shopping

Javier Peña x GN!Reader

Word count: 1600 Warnings: soft!Javi, self-deprecating!Javi, one (1) mention of (rough) love-making

A/N: Day 5 of the December Writing Challenge by @honeymandos​! ❤️ This takes place after season 3. Javi deserves some rest and lots of love!

-----------------------------------------------------------

The streets of Laredo are bathed in colours, dozens of Christmas decorations adorning the shops and houses around you. Their lights are blinking in ever changing rhythms and festive music plays in the shops as you pass them, your fingers laced with Javi’s.

Javi never really cared about Christmas a lot since he moved away from his family. He hadn’t really celebrated it in the past years, too occupied with hunting down Pablo and then the Cali cartel.

This year’s Christmas is the first time he’s properly celebrating it in ten years.

Sure, the two of you would always kind of celebrate it together. But it was not enough, he knew that. He felt awful for keeping this away from you, knowing how much you loved Christmas. But he didn’t even have a break on the holidays. Work took him away from you for basically every day and it wasn’t really possible to celebrate a proper Christmas. But this year he was planning to go all out. Just for you.

Both of you have gone back to the States a few months ago, now that the Cali cartel had finally been shut down. You bought a house together and had decided to settle down, finally lay low and enjoy a life without danger lurking around every corner.

It took him a little while to get used to it, but now he’s enjoying it to the fullest. Every day with you is a blessing to him. He enjoys watching you dance around the kitchen in only his shirt and some undies while cooking. Gets lost in the way you scrunch your nose and frown, being the cutest thing he has ever seen, while being totally absorbed by a book. He enjoys doing absolutely nothing with you all day. You would lay in bed, your head on his chest, one leg draped over his lap and one arm laying in his stomach, gently caressing his skin.

These are his favourite days with you. In the past ten years he was never able to relax for a while, empty his mind and just lay around, not worrying about a thing. Now he can’t get enough of it. The two of you would talk about anything for hours, then make soft love, sometimes even rough if you’re in the mood for it. If you’re hungry you’d just order food, even twice that day because neither of you wants to move. You both relish in the presence of each other and he feels twenty years younger when he’s with you. He feels simply amazing since you two moved in together and it’s all just because of you.

Even back in Bogotá he could only go through it all because you were there to hold him together. Every day, when he came home, he would just hold you. Most of the times you were asleep already, but would snuggle into him and that was all he needed.

Your unique smell, the softness of your body against his, your quiet little snores, the gentle smile that you wore on your lips even while you were sleeping. All of you, it put him at ease and let him forget the horrors he faced every day. You were his anchor, and he was beyond grateful for having you in his life.

Now, as he walks next to you, one hand in yours and the other carrying several bags full of Christmas presents, he feels at peace.

He smiles at your expression of wonder and excitement, big eyes looking at all the decorations and things in the showcases, head moving back and forth, trying to take in as much as you can. The lights of the decorations make your eyes sparkle and he feels his heart swell with love and affection. It is a sight he would never tire of.

“Oh, baby, look at that!” you suddenly say, pulling him towards a showcase that is not decorated too much. Artificial fir branches hanging from the ceiling and laying in the showcase, adorned with silver baubles and simple white fairy lights. The two of you stop in front of it and Javi looks inside to see what you are so giddy about.

It is a black leather jacket, quite similar to the one he owns, but more modern.

You look up at him with a big smile. Both of you know his jacket is well-worn by now, old, the leather breaking in some places. And it got a little tight around the middle.

He looks at the price and gently shakes his head at you before pulling you away from the shop, further down the road. It is too expensive and he’d rather buy something nice for you. He wants to spoil you absolutely rotten after you had to waive all those years, because of him.

You pout but walk next to him, looking at all the other shops.

After a while you tell him to go look for a place to eat dinner at, that you would go back to that one toy store because you forgot something for your niece that you had seen in the showcase while walking past it. He presses a soft kiss to your lips before you go back and he turns to look for a restaurant.

Under no circumstances would you allow him to be selfless any longer. He had given you all he had, even when he was at his lowest and now, he wouldn’t stop this.

You enjoy giving him anything he needs and wants, the affection in his eyes would never fail to make your heart beat three times faster and your smile to almost split your face in half. He is your everything and you would spoil him just like he spoils you. He deserves it.

You know he will keep the old jacket as well. It’s still in rather good condition and would just need a little bit more care. But, and you admit that this might sound a bit selfish, you don’t want him to get rid of his little belly. It’s cute and soft and you love to put your head on it. You adore his laughs when you would blow raspberries on it and his shivers while letting your fingertips gently glide over the soft skin. It’s a sign of him finally getting the quiet life he deserves.

So you go back to that shop and buy the jacket. You don’t care about the price, all you can think about is the smile he would try to suppress at your stubbornness and the knowledge that he would be happy about the present, even if he won’t say it. But you knew. Because he would show you instead of saying it.

Around 15 minutes later you walk back down the street, looking around to see where he is. Javi stands in front of a Chinese restaurant a bit further down the street. You make your way over to him and then stand right in front of him, causing him to smile down at you before he gently kisses your lips. You hum and your smile widens.

“Got what you were looking for, mi amor?” He looks down at the bag in your hand and frowns.

“That doesn’t sound like a toy store. Hm, weird.” He stares at the bag and his brain rattles. The name, he had read it somewhere today.

When his brain finally finds the answer, he looks at you with his eyebrows furrowed.

“Tell me you didn’t.”

“I did” you say, softly cupping his cheek with one hand.

His sighs and looks down at the ground.

“It’s too expensive. I don’t de-“ You press a finger to his lips, silencing him.

“Baby, you deserve the world. You went through hell and back. And you still managed to spoil me and give me everything you had. You gave and continue to give me the world and under no circumstances will I ever let you be selfless again.” You gently kiss his lips and he closes his eyes.

“You didn’t have to…” he says and then opens his eyes again to look at you. They glisten with unshed tears.

“But I wanted to. I know Christmas is not about money and tons of presents. The past Christmases have all been wonderful still, because I had them with you. We could live in a shack, with no money whatsoever. No tree, no presents, nothing. And it’d still be the best Christmas because I’d have you. Because I know you love me as much as I love you. That’s more than I could ever ask for. But I want to gift you things. Because it brings me joy when you open them and you look at me like I’m an angel sent from heaven” you whisper against his lips.

“That’s because you are” he whispers back, a grin tugging at the corner of his mouth. You giggle softly.

He presses his forehead against yours, nuzzling your nose with his.

“I’m grateful for you. I know you know that, but I want you to hear it too. You are the best thing that ever happened to me. Without you I wouldn’t be the man I am today. And I will be forever grateful for your gentleness, your patience and your love. You are an angel sent from above. And whatever greater power there is, they sent you to rescue me. And you did just that.”

Tears fill your eyes and you gently caress his cheek.

“We rescued each other, mi alma.” You say before pressing your lips to his.

-------------------------------------------

mi amor = my love

mi alma = my soul

As always, lemme know what you think, lovelies! ❤️

@absurdthirst​

[mypimpademia]

Bakugo, Todoroki, and Shinso quarantining w black s/o

Bakugo x Todoroki x black!reader x Shinso

TW: Swearing, refers to sexual activities at the end of each of them

Note: Yes, I did do most of this stuff in quarantine. [And they're aged up as always]

BAKUGO

He honestly feels like he's losing his shit

And he probably would if he did have you with him

You guys are staying up all night and watching Wild n Out, Basic to Bougie, 90 Day Fiance, all that shit

And of course Bad Girls Club

He claims he hates 90 Day Fiance and BGC, but he stays watching that shit, even if he has the remote or youre on his phone

His sleep schedule is fucked up

And by fucked up, I mean its a few hours past the old man's bed time

He goes to bed at 1 am now instead of 9 pm

But still wakes up at 9 am

He took a leave on hero work because of covid

He loves his job almost as much as he loves you (aw💖)

But hes not gonna risk his health for it

"Fuck all that bullshit, as much as I love my job, I'm staying my ass in this house. And you are too. I'll be damned if you catch it, especially if its from me."

Yall only go out once a week

He could minimize it to once every other week, but he tried that and it almost drove him crazy

There aren't any exceptions unless there's an emergency

Makes you wear gloves and use a reusable mask that he washes as soon as yall get home

And you get mostly essentials but he'll ask you if you want candy or anything and he'll buy a big box of brownie mix if you like brownies just to hold you over for a while

Also stocks up on meds like pain killers and allergy pills

No fucks given, he will hit up different stores for toilet paper

"WHY ARE ALL THESE FUCKIN IDIOTS TAKING THE TOILET PAPER?? I KNOW DAMN FUCKIN WELL YALL DONT SHIT THAT MUCH, AND HALF OF YALL PROBABLY DONT EVEN WIPE."

Hes gonna experiment with cooking more now that he has time

Writes down all the recipes that work out

Youre his taste tester so you best believe you bouta be eatin good 😌

If you want your hair done he'll order it online unless yall are already out

Hes gonna make sure that you're eating good and feeling okay because these are tough times 🥺

But hes gonna do it in his own way and act like he's not concerned

"Hey idiot, do you wanna pass out? You haven't been drinking water today, I can tell. I'm getting you a full cup, you better drink it all."

"You haven't eaten anything today, I'm making you dinner."

"Your hair is dry, come here so I can help you put oil on it. I keep telling you to take care of it, ill laught at you if you go bald." He wont

Also has you work out with him do you can stay in shape

Libido?

Yessir

Every other day, anywhere (except in public because hes not about to get sick), at anytime

It goes 50/50

Sometimes its just because hes in the mood

Other times hes feeling really soft and wants to show you that he loves you

All in all its a mixture of Bakugo losing his shit and loving you all in one

TODOROKI

He's pretty chill about it

Just super bored

Starts watching BGC, binges Basic to Bougie and 90 Day Fiance

Oddly enough he really enjoys watching Love & Hip Hop????

He finds it interesting

Especially likes Cardis season because its funny and hella memes came out of it

Don't get me wrong tho I aint a Cardi stan but you gotta admit that she's mad funny im a barb at heart tho

His crackhead really comes out over quarantine

He'll start referencing random ass memes

Hes mostly on leave for hero work unless they really need him

In that case he wears a mask and gloves out

When he gets home the first thing he does is reference BGC

"WHATS UP BAD BITCHES"

And thats how you know he's home

Goes to bed at like 1:30 - 2 am

Only because he doesn't want to be passed out if he's needed for hero duties

Goes out every other week

Mainly for basic essentials, but if you want a little extra he'll buy it

Anything else he'll buy online

Also goes to other stores to buy more toilet paper

Figured out that hes really good at crochets

So if you want your hair done he'll order any crochets you want off Amazon and do them for you

Takes care of you and makes sure your doing well all together

"Did you eat today baby?"

"How much water have you had today?"

"Have you been putting oil on your hair?"

Lotsss of cold soba

But he cooks a few other things so that its not the same thing 24/7

Asks Fuyumi for help when he doesn't know how to cook something super well

If you're the type to go to bed hella late, he'll make sure you sleep a full 8 hours

Even if you wake up after 5 he'll ask you to take a nap with him

Has you work out with him every now and then so you can both stay healthy

Not too much libido

He didn't get in the mood like that even before quarantine

Its not every other day like Bakugo though

More like twice a week

Anymore than that and it'll probably be because you needed it rather than him

If its after a mission it'll be slower just so he can show you how much he loves and appreciates you for being someone he can come home to and just being you

If its more spontaneous he'll be slightly rough but still a pretty slow

But it's a lot of crackhead Todoroki and soft Todoroki

SHINSO

He's doing fine

Just more bored than usual

I feel like Shinso likes cartoons so hes rewatching a bunch of childhood cartoons

Steven Universe, Adventure Time, Regular Show, all that good shit

Lotsss of cartoon quotes

Yall are having a pillow fight and he grabs 2 pillows and claps you?

"Cheatin ass bitch."

"Street rules, man." (Regular Show quote for those who don't know)

Please sing the bacon pancake song (Adventure Time) with him while yall make breakfast

He'll be so happy

If you do something stupid hes gonna do a lemon grab (Adventure time) quote

"UNACCEPTABLE"

On leave for hero work

Really doesn't care about getting himself sick unless he gets super sick or dies

But hes not about to get you sick

He'd genuinely rather get himself sick and die than get you sick

Yall go out twice a week

Once to get essentials and another just to get out

I feel like shinso is a decent cook so he'll cook for you

Write down recipes that you like

Also gets some off the internet

Works better with natural hair than braids and crochets

So he'll do slick backs for you and maybe give you a ponytail or something if you ask but he'd rather do 100% natural just because hes better at it and he likes natural black hair

Can also do half wigs

Takes care of you more than himself

So you have to take care of each other

"Did you drink water today, Doll?"

"I did, did you?"

"Did you eat today?"

"No, and you haven't either. What should we eat for lunch?"

"You havent been putting oil on you hair. Do you want me to help you, kitty?"

Small work out sessions

Maybe like 15 min a day

Full body tho because hes too lazy to split up days

Does to bed at like 4 - 6 am

Mostly just watching YouTube and binging cartoons and eating

Insomnia Cookies? (If you dont know, its a cookie place that delivers till 3 am and theyre so good-)

YESSIRRR

Yall gain back any weight you burned off from exercising earlier that day

Pizza, cookies, chicken nuggets, fries, fried chicken, etc.

Basically just a constant sleep over

Libido to the max

Once or twice a day

Nothing public because germs

Normally rough

But every now and then he'll get soft and just tell you how much he loves you and appreciates you

His aftercare for times like that consists of a bubble bath, lots of hugs, food and cartoons😌

[plainbrunettelbl]

ABO (A) Lumberjack Kirishima Eijiro x (O) Teacher Reader Battling With Time (Chapter Two)

Word count: 2955

Warnings: None. 

Title: ABO (A) Lumberjack Kirishima Eijiro x (O) Teacher Reader Battling With Time (Chapter Two)

Summary: You see the shark-toothed Alpha again and invite him over for dinner. 

(Gif not mine credit to the amazing wonder) 

🦈-You had talked to the kind mayor and he was all too quick to agree with you taking over while Maybelle recovered.

🦈-You had stopped by Maybelle’s house to pick up her lesson plan for the children. You knew it must have been hard teaching students of all ages instead of just one age group.

🦈-You might have looked down the street to see if you could spot a certain shark-toothed Alpha. You didn’t want to outright ask the slow-moving Omega which house her sweet neighbor lived in.

🦈-She gave you a stack of papers to go over before sending you on your way.

🦈-The schoolhouse wasn’t hard to miss. It sat a little ways away from the town overlooking a small pond. It was painted white and you could tell it doubled as a church when school wasn’t in session.

🦈-Maybelle had given you the key so you let yourself in. The place was a bit of a mess. School papers were scattered around and the chalkboard needed a good dusting.

🦈-You separated all of the papers into piles on your desk before getting to work dusting the place and opening the curtains. The place could have used a little bit of light.

🦈-You noticed the row seats and chairs had seen a few years. You were surprised there were still upright with all of the wiggling children did. You only had about twenty minutes before the kids started coming in.

🦈-The littlest of the pups were too cute. They asked you for help hanging up their scarfs and hats. The oldest ones seemed nice as well but they were more focused on their friends rather than the new teacher.

🦈-You went up to the board and wrote your name.

🦈-“Are you gonna be our new teacher?” A tiny hand shot up.

🦈-“I will be your temporary teacher until Mrs.Ito recovers.” You hum, smiling at the adorable pup.

🦈-You noticed a pair of teen boys instantly slump in their seats. They must have been the ones playing around and had caused the accident. Once a few more questions out of the way you began class.

***

🦈-It was after class when a few small pups walked up to you with gloomy faces. Your Omega was quick to push forward.

🦈-“What’s wrong?” You bent down to them.

🦈-“We go splinters from our table.” One pouted holding up their finger. The rest followed suit.

🦈-You spent the next fifteen minutes plucking them out before sending them on their way home. They thanked you with bright smiles and happy giggles before dashing out the door.

🦈-You went over to where they sat and examined the table. It did look a little rough. You needed something to smooth it down. Where could you borrow a tool like that?

🦈-You pondered a bit before brightening. Maybe you would get to see that sweet-tempered Alpha again.

***

🦈-You had asked for directions to the sawmill and made your way down there. The ground was a little uneven for your shoes but you made it down just fine. If you were staying longer than two weeks you would have thought about buying a pair of boots.

🦈-Sadly, they would be left unused when you went back to the city so you tossed the idea aside.

🦈-You found the big wooden building nestled in the trees. It looked like a big log cabin with huge windows that no doubt gave a beautiful view of the lush forest. You were hesitant to go in but the pups sad faces pushed you forward.

🦈-A man with bi-colored hair greeted you as you walked in. He was dressed in a grey three-piece suit. He looked liked he belonged in the big city rather than an up and coming town like this one.

🦈-He looked up from his paperwork, his eyes widening when he realized an Omega walked through his door and not one of his crew. He instantly was on his feet and greeting you.

🦈-“Hello, welcome to Todoroki Lumber Co, what can I do for you today?” He gentle led you to a leather seat across from his desk before sitting himself in his own expensive leather chair.

🦈-“Oh well you see I was wondering if I could borrow something from your job site.” You replied clenching your hands in your lap.

🦈-“Borrow something?” His head tilted, interest shining in his eyes. He leaned back in his chair and clasped his hands over his stomach. His calm expression settled you a bit.

🦈-“I am stepping in as the school teacher while the previous one is recovering from an injury. A few pups came up to me today with splinters on their hands that they got from their table. I was wondering if I could borrow something from here to smooth it out.” You asked, shuffling your legs.

🦈-He nodded his head, “I would be more than happy to help. I can send down one of my workers to get the job done.”

🦈-You brightened, “Thank you so much!”

🦈-“I can have someone meet you at the schoolhouse tomorrow before school starts.” He gave you a small smile before leading you out.

🦈-“I really appreciate it.” You sent him a wave before heading to home.

***

🦈-It was thirty minutes before school started, you were sitting at your desk going over the lesson plan for today. There was a gentle knock at the door you making you look up.

🦈-“Come in.” You called, setting your lesson plan down.

🦈-A head of red hair peeked in, his ruby eyes caught yours before letting himself in and smiling wide.

🦈-“It is good to see you again, Y/N.” He greeted, carrying a heavy toolbox.

🦈-“It’s good to see you! Thank you for coming over to do this. I know you said  work had been busy.” You stood up and lead him to the table that needed sanding.

🦈-“Oh it’s no problem, kids getting splinters takes priority over work orders.” He grinned setting his toolbox down before eyeing the table. Its harsh surface made him wince.

🦈-“No wonder those pups got splinters, this wood looks like it is fresh off the chopping block.” He shook his head, and began talking his tools out.

🦈-“I checked the whole classroom for any more rough spots. There are a few more on different tables all around the room.” You grimaced, wondering how Maybelle didn’t get this fixed earlier.

🦈-“I’ll get to work on it right away. You can go back to whatever you were doing.” He gave you a grin before getting to work.

🦈-His presence made the room made it seem brighter. You tried to stop peeking at him as he was bent over the table, shaking your head you got to work on writing questions and equations on the chalkboard.

🦈-You gently hummed as you did so, Eijiro nearly stumbled over the table at the sound. His Alpha was instantly sitting to attention enjoying every soft hum that met his ears.

🦈-The sanding took a while and before he knew it little feet were pounding up the stairs. You went to greet the children at the door. You helped the little ones with their coats. The sight nearly made him purr.

🦈-He could imagine small ruby eyes with your smile looking up at him. His Alpha rumbled at the thought. He pushed those thoughts aside. He still needs to win you over first before he starts thinking about pups.

🦈-“Who’s that man?” A small voice questioned, small ice-blue eyes looked up at him.

🦈-“He is here to help fix out little splinter problem.” You smiled, enjoying the way he flushed at the attention.

🦈-“Is he your mate?” Another pup asked, tugging on your long skirt.

🦈-Now it was your turn to blush.

🦈-“No, his is just a really nice friend of mine.” You corrected, herding the rest of the children inside.

🦈-“You should be his mate. He seems nice.” The pup peered at Eijiro seeing if he would agree and mate their nice teacher.

🦈-He merely coughed while packing up his things.

🦈-“I think I am done here, Y/N. Feel free to call me if something else comes up.” He smiled, heading towards the door.

🦈-You followed him out.

🦈-“Thank you again, Kirishima.” You thanked, walking down the steps with him.

🦈-“It’s no problem. I was glad to help.” He replied, sending you a toothy grin.

🦈-“I was wondering if you would like to come over tomorrow and eat dinner with me.To thank you for coming down here. I know you said you liked pot roast.” You offered, fiddling with your fingers.

🦈-If it was even possible his grin got even wider. His Alpha already yipping in joy at the thought of spending more time with this sweet Omega and the promise of meat.

🦈-“I would love to. What time should I be over?” He asked, trying to keep himself from jumping up and down.

🦈-“I think seven should be fine.” You informed, hiding a grin and his clearly excited face.

🦈-“Seven it is. I look forward to it!” He agreed, shooting you one last smile before heading back to the lumber mill.

🦈-He couldn’t wait till tomorrow. His heart was beating fast the whole walk back to the mill. He knew this Omega was the one. He just had to convince her he was the one for her as well.

***

🦈-Your cousins house smelled like roasted meat and vegetables. You had came home straight after school had let out. You went out and bought the supplies you needed yesterday.

🦈-You all but skipped your way to the general store and butcher shop.

🦈-Your cousin’s house was warm and comfy but you couldn’t stop yourself from thinking of a certain scarlet eyed Alphas house that appealed to your Omega.

🦈-She was ready to make it her own.

🦈-You playfully shoved her aside, blushing at the mere thought of living with the kind Alpha. You could see yourself snuggling up on a rocking chair on his back porch enjoying a good book while he chopped up some wood.

🦈-Maybe admire a little more than the words on the pages.

🦈-You slapped your cheeks shoving those thoughts aside and got to work on kneading the bread for the meal. You had minced up some garlic and mixed it with butter. You were gonna spread it on the bread as soon as it was out of the oven.

🦈-You really hoped he enjoyed what you were cooking. You really enjoyed his company and you couldn’t stand the thought of serving him a bad meal. Especially since it was his favorite.

🦈-Your Omega was all for pleasing the gentle Alpha.

🦈-You smiled as you stirring the bubbling pot not knowing what was happening across town.

***

🦈-“What the heck do I wear!?”  Eijiro paced around his bedroom in a pair of boxers and a white undershirt.

🦈-A series of clothes thrown on his bed. It ranged from jeans, black slacks, button-up long sleeve shirts, and different colored vests.

🦈-“Jeans or slacks? Vest or no vest? Should I wear my work boots or cowboy boots? What if I show up in jeans and she thinks I didn’t dress up enough? What if I dress fancy and she dressed causally?” He tugged on a white long sleeve shirt.

🦈-“Okay the shirt is done. Now I just need to pick my pants and to decide if I want to wear a vest or not.” He tugged at his collar in his mirror, his hair was down and framing his face.

🦈-He finally settled on jeans with a tan vest to put over his white shirt. He rolled up his sleeve since they were a little tight on his forearms. When lumber season picked up he tended to gain more muscle.

🦈-He was glad his size hadn’t intimidated you.

🦈-Some Omegas would cross the road when they saw him approaching. His Alpha would whine at the action. He wanted a mate he could cherish more than anything, their avoidance made him think no one would ever want him.

🦈-Now that he had a sweet Omega in his life he wasn’t tempted to let you go anytime soon.  

🦈-He slipped on his cowboy boots and made his way towards you cousins house. He had asked for directions when he was at the restaurant the last night. Mable was more than happy to give him the address and some more of the town gossip.

🦈-He couldn’t enjoy his meal yesterday since he kept thinking about how he was going to be eating something you made. His Alpha couldn’t wait, roasted meat and spending time with his Omega was heaven to him.

🦈-He had just barely knocked on the door when he realized he didn’t bring anything to give to you. He shuffled his eyes to the flowerbed the neighbor had and wondered if he could get away with picking a couple.

🦈-Before he had a chance to pluck a couple the door was pulled open.

🦈-You brilliant smile greeted him. His Alpha purred at the adorable sight of you standing in a apron with flour on your forehead. He hoped with all his heart he would get to see this for the rest of his life.

🦈-“Hello, please come in! I didn’t have the chance to freshen up a bit before you came. The fire stove was being a bit temperamental.” You chuckled, wiping your hands on your apron and leading him in.

🦈-“I’m sorry I didn’t bring anything with me.” Eijiro stumbled, his brain trying to restart after looking at your heavenly figure.

🦈-“Oh, you are fine. All you needed to bring was yourself and a huge appetite.” You led him to the kitchen and started stirring a heated pot while talking to him. He didn’t know if he should sit down at the table so instead he leaned against it instead.

🦈-He was glad he chose to wear his cowboy boots because he would have been mortified to track in dirt on the clean floors.

🦈-“I might have made too much. I hope you are hungry.” You smiled over your shoulder.  

🦈-He hastily nodded, his stomach growling at the delicious smell filling the house. Something told him this was gonna be the best pot roast he ever had. He helped you bring the piping hot pot to the table.

🦈-Once everything was on the table he settled into his chair across from you. You had taken off your apron and revealed a nice dress underneath. It was paler in color than the red one he first had seen you in.

🦈-It still made his heart flutter.

🦈-He nervously played with the napkin on his lap while you served him. He could have done it himself but you snatched his plate up before he had the chance. He didn’t care how much you protested, he was gonna be helping you with the dishes after the meal was done.

🦈-“So how was work yesterday? Anything new?” You asked, placing his steaming plate down.

🦈-“Not really. We are still finishing up a big order. Someone the next town over wants to build a new barn for his cattle before winter hits.” He said, blowing on a spoonful of meat and potatoes.

🦈-As soon as it hit his taste buds he was a goner. His Alpha would do anything to eat this for the rest of his life. His Alpha was happily wagging his tail at each spoonful.

🦈-“This is the best pot roast I ever tasted, Y/N.” He complimented, looking up at you.

🦈-You flushed under his praise. You Omega was very pleased with his reaction. She nearly purred to show how happy she was. You held it down, barley. She pouted at the censorship.

🦈-“Thank you. I was worried I had under-seasoned it.” You smiled, digging into your plate as well. You had been watching him for his reaction and hadn’t touched yours yet.

🦈-You hummed as it hit your tongue. It was perfect.

🦈-“I don’t think having leftovers will be a problem.” He eyed the huge pot, eager to eat every ounce of it.

🦈-You laughed at his desperate display for more. A warm feeling bloomed in your chest.

***

🦈-“Thank you for the meal. It was lovely.” He thanked, standing by the unopened front door.

🦈-“Thank you for coming. I really enjoyed your company. I don’t know a lot of people in town so it can get pretty lonely.” You explained, fiddling with your dress.

🦈-“Well I am more than happy to keep you company.” He grinned, taking in your sweet face before he had to walk out the door. His Alpha was already whining at the thought of going home to an empty house.

🦈-You didn’t know how to respond to that without making a fool of yourself.

🦈-“Get home safe.” You ordered, opening the door for him.

🦈-Before you knew what you were doing you grabbed a fistful of his vest and tugged him down. You soft lips met his slightly rough cheek. Before he could get a word out you pushed him out of the house.

🦈-He was starstruck and dazed on the other side of the door. You were pretty winded yourself leaning up against the door for support. Never had you done anything that scandalous before. You weren’t even courting!

🦈-All you knew for certain was that you were going to go buy a pair of boots tomorrow.

Another Western AU! I am thinking of doing the part 2 for Tamaki next. Please let me know what you think of this one! Wasn’t Kiri’s distress over his clothes too cute! 

Please reblog to show your support. It really motivates me to write more. Leave a note as well! ❤️❤️

[drazzilder]

A Hellish Encounter

By Drazzilder

Chapter 33: Something New

It has been a few days since you got the offer from Nezu and you can’t stop thinking about it. You’re walking along the street by yourself in your off time. Even though you are not on hero work time, you can’t help but want to monitor the streets. Zaheer is off with Enji working on some hero work, you didn’t bother to ask because your too busy thinking about other things. All you can think about is how it might help the students but also how it might hurt them. You don’t want to hurt anyone, that’s the last thing you want to do. You decide to walk in a park to try to calm your mind. Enji calls and you answer.

“Hello (Y/N). How are you doing?”

“I’m ok, I can’t stop thinking about the offer.”

“Don’t worry about it, we will talk more about it tonight, but we have to decide by tomorrow.”

“I know, I just can’t stop thinking about when Midnight’s nose bled.”

“You were pushing the limits of what you normally can do, you won’t be doing that with students.”

“I know... Hey, I’m going to the grocery store later, did you want anything special for dinner?” You say trying to change the subject.

“Anything you cook is fine, but I am feeling something beef today.”

“I just got a new recipe for beef Wellington, how does that sound?”

“Sounds great. Got to go. Love you.”

“Bye, love you too.”

The cherry blossoms are in full bloom as you walk along a stream. The pedals are falling like snowflakes as the wind blows them around. You wish Enji was there with you to see it but you know he has seen it all before. You just sit on a bench and enjoy some warm coffee you got from a vending machine. A few kids stop by you to ask for autographs. Getting noticed in public isn’t something new to you, it has just become a lot more frequent. It’s hard to miss you with a red tail and horns on your head. You don’t mind, you sign everything they ask, including T-shirts and hats, much to the dismay of some parents. It’s about noon when you finish your walk so you start head back and enter the local grocery store. You find it better to go for smaller shops, they seem to have better quality plus you get to know everyone there. It’s nice to not have to worry if someone will stop you because you’re a hero. After picking up everything for the recipe, you buy look at some nice sake to go with dinner. You ask the clerk what would go best and they suggest going for red wine instead. At the counter, you get checked out and are on your way.

Walking back home, you notice that there looks to be as something going on across the street. It looks to be a scuffle but you notice other heroes are going to stop it so you go back to your phone. Your mind is still racing a bit and you get a few text messages from Enji so your too busy to notice your surroundings. You start to walk along the cross walk when a garbage truck starts barreling towards you. You barely have any time to react when you notice. All you can do is put your arms up to cover your face as a reaction. You hear the ground rumble and screams from people on the street. You open your eyes to ice everywhere. The truck has stopped from a huge wall of ice, large enough to cover almost a whole city block. Looking around, you try to see who could have stopped the truck when you notice your hands. They are cold and covered with ice. Looking down, your legs are frozen as well, stuck to the ground. You stand there a moment and notice the ice starting to creep up your arms and legs. You try in a panic to stop the ice from getting worse, but it is no use. The ice crawls up to your shoulders when a red flash appears in your peripheral vision.

“Endeavor, quickly!” Zaheer says running towards you. Endeavor then quickly grabs you and holds you tight as he lets his flames engulf you. You start to feel the ice start to melt off your arms and legs as he lifts you off the ground. You’re still shivering in his arms as he continues to warm you. It takes a few moments for you to finally warm up enough to talk.

“What happened, (Y/N)? Are you ok? Zaheer said that he felt you getting too cold so we rushed over here as fast as we could. You didn’t lose control, did you?” Enji says as you’re sitting on the edge of the road.

“I… I don’t know what happened. I was walking in the street when that garbage truck almost hit me. I put up my arms and closed my eyes then the ice was there.”

“Zaheer, any idea?”

“I have one but you’re not going to like it.”

“Tell me, is (Y/N) going to be ok?”

“I don’t know how else to tell you this, but that’s a new quirk.”

“Ok, so we have been through this before. What’s the problem?” Enji says looking at Zaheer.

“I never have been able to control or make ice.” He says with shock on his face.

“Zaheer, what are you saying? Is this my quirk?” You say looking at your hands.

“Think about it, someone who had an ice quirk used their life to get me inside of you.”

“This is Rei? This is her quirk, how is this possible?”

“What?!” You look wide eyed looking at Zaheer.

“It’s the only thing I can think of. Let’s get you checked out at the doctor to see if it’s true.”

At the hospital and after many tests, you are sitting in a room with Enji and Zaheer. You are all silent as you wait for the results to come back. Once the doctor comes in, he confirms what Zaheer said. You got a new quirk and it is the exact one Rei had. This one is different though, normally your quirks are hard to identify because they come from a demon but this one is all yours. The only thing you can do is look at your hands and feet while the doctor says all of this. Your mind is racing with everything that has happened, wondering if it is real. All three of you then go back to the agency to discuss.

“Why is this happening to me?”

“It’s ok (Y/N), we can handle this.” Enji says as he puts an arm around you while you’re both on the couch.

“It will be fine, but I have to ask you, what happened?”

“The only thing I can think of is Rei said she will always be watching and always be with me. She said that after she touched my head in that dream or whatever it was. Was she giving me her quirk? I guess it activated when I was by myself and in danger. I don’t know how I did it.”

“She was protecting you.”

“I guess that is the last thing she wanted to do to with her life, to make sure that I would be ok.”

“It makes sense, she wants to protect you so you can protect the kids.”

“She said protect them, she also meant you.”

“What?”

“She knew you can overheat so giving me her quirk to balance it was her way of looking out for you.”

He looked at the ground, trying not to tear up. “She really did care for me, didn’t she?”

You use a hand to turn Enji’s face to you. “She did care for you, she never wanted to hurt you. She wanted to protect you and the children and you know I will.” You say with a smile. “I will just have to train this quirk too. If I’m going to protect you, I can’t go around freezing half the city, can I? Zaheer, we now have more work to do, what do you think?”

“Well, we need to train it so you don’t lose control again. I just worry about overloading you.”

“With the help from both of you, I think I can manage. Come here.” You say as you bought everyone together to hug. “As long as I have both of you, I can handle anything.” As you kiss each on the cheek.

“We need to get back to work. (Y/N), are you ok to still cook dinner or should I order something?”

“I’ll be fine, I already bought everything to cook. I’ll see you later.” You say as you vanish in a flash of blue light. Later on, Enji and Zaheer arrive home just as your finishing dinner. After eating, Zaheer goes back inside of you for the night and you and Enji discuss the offer.

“I know you had a rough day but did you think about Nezu?”

“I did, and I think I’m going to do it.”

“Really? Why say yes now?”

“I’m thinking about my new quirk. If I lose control, I always have you to help me but these students might not have help. They need someone who can find a way to help them. I know it’s not going to be perfect and I might hurt a student a little but I was given this power for a reason. If I can train more heroes, I’m saving more innocent people.”

“I think that’s a very noble way of thinking about it.” He says as he pulls you close.

“Can we go to bed early; I’m really tired from today.”

“Of course. Can you try not to have a nightmare tonight? I can’t stand seeing you in so much pain.”

“I’ll try. Keep your heat on a little and it should help.”

“Always.” Enji says as he kisses your forehead.  

Next Chapter

[ashintheairlikesnow]

Confusion for the one word prompt!

CW: Some inadvertent, non-hostile ableism

Ronnie’s got her pen in her mouth, chewing idly on the cap, sitting on a little bench in the ‘storytime’ section of the bookstore while she flips through a magazine full of recipes, discarding this one or that one as she makes her grocery lis for next week.

Tris isn’t the pickiest eater as long as the food isn’t “mixed up” - she cooks all the pieces separately, puts them on a plate, and then mixes them up for she and Paul afterward. It’s just that Paul has always had a weirdly specific taste in food, and it’s easy to narrow down what she can make and can’t if she wants her husband to eat, too.

Not that he wouldn’t happily make himself dinner separately, he’s a grown-ass man, but she still tries to make things that include him.

Nearby, seven-year-old Tris sits on the rough carpeting, humming to himself as he carefully lines up a series of books that, as far as she can tell, are about cats. She has no idea what he is using as a criteria for which books go where - clearly he’s not what number in the series they actually represent, she can see from here that they’re lined up all out of order - but he is deeply and seriously involved in his work, and his humming is soft-pitched, low and quiet. 

“You good, Tris?” Ronnie asks, writing the word ‘apples’ down on her grocery list. 

“Mmmn, mmmmn, mmmmn,” He says, and she decides to take that as a ‘yes’ and goes back to looking at the apple crumble recipe. 

He’s been wearing that dinosaur shirt for four days, but he agreed this morning to put something else on his afternoon, if she would wash it so he can wear it clean tomorrow again. At least he agrees to clean underwear and pants, right? She has friends in her parents-group whose kids are Tristan’s age and still can’t dress themselves. Or maybe they just feel better without the weight and scratch of clothes on their skin.

Sometimes, she thinks she should really just buy seven sets of the same damn shirt, and let Tristan be happy.

That morning he had climbed into bed with she and Paul, snuggling up under her chin, and hummed and tapped and hummed and tapped in happiness until Ronnie had pulled him up and half-carried him out, just to let her poor husband get a few hours of sleep after work. 

He’ll go to daytime work hours soon, he promises, and Ronnie can’t fucking wait until she can stop trying to keep her son silent while his father sleeps, because that’s one particular mountain she is fucking tired of climbing.

Rather than deal with it today, she took Tris to the bookstore, and Tristan is safely ensconced in a routine he loves - bookstore at 9 AM when they open the doors, Mommy gets her breakfast and coffee and Tris gets to pick a snack and the chocolate milk in the red box with a cow on the front, stay through storytime at 11:30, and then get a chicken nugget happy meal with ranch dressing for dipping on the way home. 

Every bookstore day is the same. He wraps himself in the schedule like it’s a warm blanket, and Ronnie can’t say she doesn’t love mornings out with him when he’s not overwhelmed. 

When he pulls down the books and lines them up, or stacks them, or just holds four or five while looking at them. Her favorite days are when he brings them to her and explains, in his halting, soft stammer, every single goddamn detail of what happens. She sets her expression to fascination and listens and thinks that there was a time, before gymnastics and therapy and IEPs and everything she’s fought for, where she worried that she would lose her son to his own mind, that he would stop coming out of it to find her.

“Mommy, that weird boy is making a funny noise,” A high-pitched voice says, and Ronnie glances up from her grocery list to see a harried woman with ash-blonde hair, carrying a pink backpack with a unicorn on it over one arm, a little girl with blonde hair on one side and a toddler with red hair on the other. The woman’s eyes meet Ronnie’s, briefly, and Ronnie sets her jaw, ready for the fight.

Tristan doesn’t seem to even hear them. If he does, he doesn’t care. He goes on smiling, picking between two books with a deep seriousness, before choosing one to set down. He never cares what anyone says who isn’t one of his gymnastics friends, who take him as he is. It’s Ronnie who always feels the need to defend his brain. Tris just goes on living.

“Mommy, why is that boy-”

“Ssshhhh, that’s very rude to talk about people,” The woman says, looking away from her then, and Ronnie’s fingers tighten around her pen, digging a black dot into the paper until she’s worried she’ll tear it. 

She knows what comes next. People like that, kids like him, she’s heard it all, more of it from Tristan’s own teachers than she’d ever admit to him. Not that he would care, really.

There’s a moment where she opens her mouth, ready to say something, to build the wall around Tristan as she has always done, when the woman adds, “He’s just enjoying himself, honey. Some kids make sounds when they’re happy, just like when you sing at home and in the car, right? He’s just in a good mood. He’s just singing here, instead.”

Ronnie stares at her. She didn’t expect that. Her mouth stays open, the sharper words still harsh on her tongue, unspoken.

“Oh.” The girl thinks it over. She’s blonde, too, and looks just like the woman. She wears a white shirt with a unicorn made out of glitter on the front and pink leggings, plus pink shoes. Ronnie wonders, for just a second, what it might have been like to have a second child, a girl, to buy those kinds of things for.

Not that Tristan didn’t love glitter, too, to be honest. Honestly he probably wouldn’t mind pink, either, as long as it had a fucking velociraptor on it. No, wait, the big ones weren’t really velociraptors, Tris and Paul said that was some other one... Having your son and husband care so much about dinosaurs is sort of exhausting.

She should see if there were pink glitter dinosaur shirts... he might like those.

“Hey.” The girl marches over to Tristan, and he looks up after a second, as if broken out of his internal spell, looking at her. The last hum dies on his lips. The woman and Ronnie both redden, neither looking at the other. “Hey, kid.”

Tristan looks at her, blinking. Then he holds out the last book, in his hands. “Dark River,” He says, simply. 

The girl looks down, looking at the painting of a cat on the cover, and then nods, solemnly. “I read that one,” She says, head tilted. “It’s good.”

Tristan nods, and lays the book down with all the others. 

“Why are you doing that?” The girl asks, and Ronnie tenses again.

“I, I, I want to,” Tristan says without looking up.

“Huh.” The girl pauses, for a second, and then says, “I like to make my books like that, too.” Then she turns and walks away, and her mother takes the toddler by the hand and follows.

Ronnie hears the girl’s mother say, “Wait, that’s why you always make a mess with your books?”

Ronnie watches them go, staring, wondering what she just witnessed. If it means something, if it means nothing, if it means the woman will get her daughter evaluated, if if if if.

“Done,” Tristan says, breaking her out of her stupor. She watches him rearrange the books back into the order they were originally shelved in and place them carefully back. “Better, better now.”

Better than what? Her son is a mystery, and she safeguards him like a dragon guarding treasure it cannot understand but knows it would give its life for.

He looks at her, still comically solemn. “Snack?”

“Uh... yeah,” Ronnie says, voice slightly raspy. “Yeah, baby. Snacktime.”

“Story, storytime after?”

“Yep, we have...” Ronnie checks her phone. “Twenty minutes until storytime, so that’s perfect.”

Tristan smiles in her general direction and waits as Ronnie gathers her things back up. He doesn’t look back at the girl as he leaves the kids’ section and heads for the front, where the café is. 

Ronnie wonders if the girl looks back at him. 

[hotspringfairy]

February 3, 2021

I'm so over it.

My best friend and I have been living with his parents for a year and a half. They're letting us stay in their basement for no rent, just contributing to household expenses. We asked if we could do this in order to save up enough money to pay off our debts (except student loans) and save up to buy our own house together. We were just feeling very stuck after being forced to move from a house we had been renting at a reasonable price for 5 years- rent prices had gone up crazy high in that time and we ended up in an over-priced apartment for a year out of desperation, really only making enough to cover our bills.

I must start by saying that this is ridiculously generous of them. I don't regret this at all, it's given me and my best friend that little leg-up that we desperately needed. And living with them hasn't been as bad as I thought it might be (I've known them for like 12 years now- they can be . . . difficult).

So yes, I'm incredibly grateful for my situation, now on to the bitching lol

I tried in the beginning to keep our food a little more separate. However, my friend's mom really wanted us to combine groceries and to cook for us. I gave in pretty quickly to what she wanted, mostly because I don't have a choice.

They absolutely suck at cooking vegetables, which is an extra shame because I freaking love veggies! If soggy, over-boiled, and unseasoned mush is what people think vegetables are like, than I totally get the hate! I wouldn't eat that shit! I don't eat that shit! Idk how many nasty vegetables I've tossed in the trash over the past year. They won't even toss them on a baking sheet for goodness sake.

I started listing all the ways that my kitchen access is limited, but it was getting way too long lol the dynamics in the house are difficult to explain. I'm going to cut it down to this: the dad gets very weird about food and often pushes food on us and wants to have unnecessary conversations about food. He does not like more than one person being in the kitchen at a time (even if there's plenty of space). He is uncomfortable around me, and I try to be respectful and give him his space- I don't want to intrude, especially considering their generosity.

I also don't like having to interact with them (or anyone at all) when I'm in "alone-time mode," so I often won't go upstairs much on the weekends because of that. Pretty much every day they watch their grandkids, who are awesome, but kids are certainly not my thing and they make me uncomfortable. When the kids aren't over, they're often arguing, and if I hear them literally yelling at each other I won't go upstairs.

That's the short (but unfortunately still way too long) version of some of the issues I'm having with food at this house. They often make food for me that I don't want, and I often feel like I can't prepare my own food.

Last night I munched out on snacks instead of having dinner, which made me go way over my calorie goal range. I was having a rough day, like guys, I forgot to put on makeup before work yesterday. I've never in my whole life forgotten to put on makeup and I've never been to this job without at least my cover-up on! It wasn't a big deal, but it's not like me to forget that, I was really out of it yesterday. I'm not ok. I've had a lot on my mind, good and bad. Anyways, I just really needed to relax by myself after work.

My friend had gone to the store for us and gotten me cheese tortellini that he knows I like, kinda as a treat for me. He even bought pesto and Alfredo sauce so I'd have 2 sauce options (I recently haven't been able to eat tomatoes- like not even a bite of something with even dehydrated tomato on it or I will vomit- idk why, but it's been an adjustment for me since apparently EVERYTHING HAS TOMATOES IN IT).

His parents made the tortellini, and then mixed them with tomatoes. Not even marinara sauce, just bland-ass canned tomatoes. Didn't cook them together either, but apparently they had to be stirred in. So everyone else had that. I needed time to myself and they not only had a toddler running around, but they were also being overbearing. And I'd already been intruded upon downstairs twice. So I stayed downstairs and ate the snacks I had there and took care of myself.

It wasn't the best decision. I should have made myself real food. But I just could not muster the mental energy to deal with them. It was the best I could do for myself yesterday.

So I'm super frustrated. I feel like I went over on my calories directly because I don't have a kitchen I can use without getting hassled, and I just wasn't up to getting hassled. I think this has been an unfair obstacle for me on an already very difficult journey.

Until now I've been able to skate by. With so much weight to lose, I really don't have to do 100% to see results. However, my weightloss is slowing to an absolute crawl, and I can see that my downstairs-binging is holding me back. But it's so unfair to expect myself to do better given the circumstances. And we're moving really soon, I'm not 100% sure when, but in the next few months.

I just have to hang in there and keep doing my best. I'm trying to balance holding myself accountable for bad choices, but also not beating myself up for making not the best decisions when I'm in not the best situations. Today I feel both that I am making excuses when I should accept that I could and should have done better, and that I'm being too harsh on myself given the circumstances. Not sure how I'm managing both of those.

First time in a long time that I've had to battle this much negative self-talk. But good on me for shutting that shit down fast.

[dorevenge]

where ignorance is bliss - chapter 10: snow will follow

SUMMARY: Maria is expecting, and the pregnancy is rough on her and Howard. [AO3 LINK]

CHAPTERS: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 [10] 11 12 13 14 15 ☆

May 22, 1970 – Manhattan, New York, Stark Manor

“Howard!” I scream, halfway down the staircase to the first floor, hands clenching to the railing. “It’s happening!” I’m nine months pregnant, and it feels like a pit has opened up behind my stomach, squeezing the life out of me at the same time, my knuckles going white from the pressure.

Howard runs over to me, one of the quickest 53-year-olds I’ve met, pushing up his sleeve to count the seconds on his wrist, whispering the time to himself. He guides me down the stairs, arm around my waist and shoulder supporting my armpit.

“Have Edwin bring the car around,” I saw. Tears stream from my eyes, my knees wobble from the pain, and Howard says the same thing he always does.

“They’re just Braxton Hicks, doll. The contractions aren’t close enough together.” He sets me down on the couch and wipes my face dry.

“They feel real,” I snap at him without meaning to.

“I know, I’m sorry. Let’s get you something to drink, settle your stomach.”

Edwin runs off to the kitchen, “I’ll put the kettle on.”

“You have to stay hydrated, and lay on your left side,” Howard continues. He brushes my hair out of the way and guides me to a horizontal position.

“I don’t want to lay on my left side, I want my body back,” I whine, adjusting the pillows underneath me to support the bowling ball sticking out of me. The pain behind my abdomen rages on like a wildfire. “Can you put the movie on?”

“Are we feeling West Side Story or Singing in the Rain today?” Howard prides himself on our home video library, collecting almost every film we would go out to see at the cinema. Our home theatre was impressive, given he had tried to make his own film production company at one point. It was his only unsuccessful venture, so we don’t talk about that aspect of it very often, but he keeps up with the technology and is obsessed with recreating the feeling of going to see a talkie at home.

“West Side Story.”

He puts the tape in, and the familiar opening plays out. Watching it reminds me of the first Academy Awards Show I accompanied Howard to, where we watched West Side Story sweep the competition, when Rita Moreno won in that stunning dress. It was only eight years ago, but it feels like a lifetime now, like many lifetimes have passed during Howard’s and my relationship. And now I’m cramping and swollen and bloated, as far as I can be from walking down a red carpet.

I’m asleep before “Something’s Coming” plays.

“Can you chew any louder?”

“Maria, we’re having soup. There’s no chewing involved.”

“It’s making me sick,” I say.

“I’ll go in the pantry,” Howard offers without complaint, used to this by now, kissing the top of my head and taking his bowl of soup with him into the pantry, shutting the door behind him.

Edwin and Ana look up cautiously from their bowls. “Shall we leave you as well, Mrs. Stark?” Ana asks.

“Why would you? You’re completely fine.”

I wake from a dead sleep at two in the morning, after a long day of getting mad at Howard for things that he couldn’t help, and I know I’m going into labor. This time, it isn’t Braxton Hicks, I know it. I rustle Howard’s shoulder. Then I shake it harder. “Howard, wake up,” I whisper harshly. He slowly blinks his eyes open. “We need to go to the hospital.”

“Let me get my watch,” he reaches over to flick on his bedside lamp.

“It’s for real this time.” I know it. I don’t want him to question it, I can feel it in my gut; today is the day we meet our child for the first time.

“If we go in again for more practice contractions, I don’t think the hospital will let ever let us come back.”

I pause before replying.

“My water broke.”

I’ve never seen Howard get out of bed and get dressed so quickly before. He throws my already packed bag at Edwin to have him bring the car around, asks Ana to change the bedsheets, and helps me dress myself, ushering me out the door. For the first time in the last nine months, I’m the calmest person in the Stark household, focusing on my breathing and answering the nurses’ questions as Howard stammers, trying to take care of everything at once. They confirm I am indeed in labor, run their preliminary tests, and show us to the suite we had reserved.

I didn’t realize the suite would be so luxurious; it was nicer than some hotels I’ve stayed at. A jacuzzi and a pool table are tucked away in the corner, along with a full-sized refrigerator and a private bathroom. We’re given a run-down of the amenities, including an on-call masseuse and chef, but as we settle in, I just want Edwin’s cooking and fanciful retellings of his days spent running around Los Angeles with the SSR. The way he tells it, he makes Peggy sound more heroic than Captain America.

“Don’t get mad at me, but you’re as beautiful now as you were the day I met you back in Monaco.” Howard dabs my forehead with a cool cloth.

“I have half a child sticking out of me!” I yell from gritted teeth between contractions. “And you’re flirting with me right now?” Rivets of sweat trickle down my brow between my breasts, chest heaving with effort. The pain from the contractions pulses through me. We’re almost 14 hours into the labor now, and I’ve never been more tired in my life. I want to sleep, but every fiber of every muscle in my body is engaged and trying to get through this.

“Jesus, doll, I said don’t get mad at me.” I take his hand and squeeze it hard enough he winces, like I’m siphoning the pain out of me and into him. He whispers words of encouragement into my ear, watering me and obeying every order from the doctor, not straying from my side - until we hear the peal of cries and the magical words –

“It’s a boy.”

Anthony Howard Stark was born May 29, 1970, a healthy 6 pounds and 10 ounces, with ten fingers, ten toes, and two powerful lungs that never stopped crying. And I do mean never. Baby Tony had no respect for what time of day it was, who was visiting, or how tired his parents were. Although we hadn’t discussed names at all before that day, it came together perfectly; a beautiful name for our beautiful boy.

Howard returned to work within the week Tony was born, taking Edwin with him every day to try to make up for the lost time at S.H.I.E.LD. base at Camp Lehigh. At dinner after his first day back, Howard had nothing about complaints about the way things had been run in his absence. “One of the security guards said the Tesseract went missing for five minutes and showed right back up in its containment unit. I think we have a breach, but everyone swears they didn’t see anything out of the ordinary,” he says over a plate of chicken and asparagus.

“When was this?”

“Back in April. We need to up our security.”

When I announce I am ready to retire and go to bed, everyone at the table stands to help. While I appreciate the attention and assistance, I’m looking forward to being able to get up on my own. The delivery has had an immense toll on my body, wiping me out completely with the emergency Cesarian. I can’t stand on my own for more than thirty seconds at a time, and Ana has been instrumental in my recovery. She takes care of Tony when I can’t, and when Howard is kept late at the office. She changes every diaper, cleans every dish, and I cannot thank her enough times. I think she took to the role quite well, and I don’t look forward to the day it’s taken from her again.

“Master Tony, you are quite the tornado,” I hear Edwin say down the hall as I fold laundry in the living room. Tony has just turned two, and his favorite word currently is “no.” Edwin does his best to toe the line between butler and substitute father-figure, but Tony needs a firm hand – the opposite of what he gets from Howard when he’s either stuck in the lab or nursing a gin and tonic.

“Tony Tornado! Tony Tornado!” Tony sprints down the hall, giggling, spilling his cup of Cheerios and leaving a trail behind him.

“Master Tony!” Edwin takes off after him. He is almost 60 by now, and, somehow, he still keeps up with the toddler. The two of them were practically inseparable. We lost Ana last year to a long battle with cancer, and it’s almost like Tony made it his personal mission to keep Edwin entertained and distracted enough to forget about the tragedy. I often find them playing make-believe with flying robots or watching cartoons on Saturday mornings, cross-legged on the carpet in the den.

I spend my first two years of motherhood caressing egos, trying to be the entertainer and people-pleaser, but I find myself just wanting all four of us to be together at home, instead of stuck late in offices or meetings or dinner parties that no one wants to attend in the first place. I miss my husband because even when he’s at home, he’s really back at the Stark Industries headquarters, still thinking about that damn arc reactor.

[rjhpandapaws]

A Cup of Something Better

Ch3: Lesser of Two Evils

The cab ride home from work went by slowly, not so much because there was traffic or anything of that sort, it was because Connor was wrapped up in his thoughts. Time seemed to bend and stretch around him as he played back his work day. There were things he knew, like how he disliked working the afternoons because they were slow, how he preferred working with Simon or Josh over North because they would talk about classes instead of customers. But there were also things he didnt understand, like why it got under his skin when people altered their drinks; health reasons aside of course. Following that train of thought almost directly, was the man who added all that espresso to his vanilla latte, though Connor couldn't decide if his issue lie with the drink itself or the man who had ordered it.

Connor sighed and rubbed at his face leaning back into the seat. He tried to think about his classes for the night, what books he would need. It was a question that was easily answered, he would need his calculus textbook, and for his English class he would need the paper back book that had collection of 20th century shirt stories in it. He preferred his math class to his literary analysis class, numbers were certain and clear, if you did one thing another of a few given options would be the direct outcome. Literary analysis relied on opinion amd there weren't really any absolutes; and if he purposely aligned his views with those of he professor he would be docked points. Which then brought his thoughts to one Professor Hank Anderson, he was nice enough, rough around the edges and not, at first glance, the kind of person you would expect to see teaching a college English class. He drank enough coffee that Connor was willing to bet he would bleed the stuff if he was cut. Or, maybe he just drank coffee on Mondays to get over the exhaustion of the weekend. Connor was in the hybrid variation of the class and because of that only attended on Mondays.

His thoughts had begun to cycle back to coffee, and through that, back to the cafe, because of that then back to specific drink orders and their owners. There was Machiatto Guy who sometimes came in more than once in a day and ordered either a medium or large Carmel Machiatto with a single shot of espresso, constant if not consistent. Richard came by most mornings, usually just before or just after Machiatto Guy, and always ordered a medium back coffee, constant and consistent. Then were was Markus who stooed by on the days he wasnt working with them and would pick a drink at random before heading to his apartment to paint. Today there had also been his Latte Murderer, Connor didn't know if he would be coming back or not, but he sincerely hoped that monster of a drink wouldn't be his usual.

The cab stopped outside his apartment block, he paid using his phone and headed up to his unit. He had about two hours give or take before he needed to leave. His plan for the evening consisted of calling Richard, making dinner and relaxing with shitty TV if he had the time. He entered his apartment and set his keys in the bowl by the door, he grabbed the iPad off the counter and set it in the stand by the stove. He opened the discord app and tapped the name UnluckyNine and then the call icon. None too surprised when Richard picked up right away.

UnluckyNine: That was fast. Not cooking dinner tonight?

Connor was looking in the freezer grabbing a proportioned serving of salmon as well as a bag of frozen vegetables. After he had set two pans on the stove he stole a glance at the iPad to see if Richard had sent anything.

"No. I am, you're on the iPad for the moment, its an emergency." The butter had melted in the first pan so Connor very carefully set the portion of salmon to cook, the sound filling the small kitchen, "I am having a crisis."

UnluckyNine: That kind of day? Was it the Machiatto Guy again?

Connor groaned at the reminder, he'd just gotten his thoughts out of that particular spiral. He poked at the cooking salmon a little more aggressively than needed with his spatula with the hope it would make him feel better. It didn't. So he supposed all that was left to do was admit his defeat and ask for help seeing as his dinner didn't hold the answer to his problems. It was unfortunate really.

"He did come in today, but he wasn't the worst of it unfortunately. But still, what kind of beast adds espresso to a Carmel Machiatto! Its supposed to be sweet! Sweet, Richard not bitter." Connor took a deep breath, letting it put as an overdrawn sigh. He gave another cathartic poke to his salmon before lifting it to check the bottom, the sizzling returning to the room as he put it back, "This guy came in today, and ordered a medium vanilla latte and asked for four shots of espresso. Four! In a drink that doesn't even have espresso in it! Machiatto Guy is a saint compared to him!"

He heard Richard typing something out as he opened the cabinet above the iPad looking for the garlic salt. When he found it he set it on the counter and checked the iPad.

UnluckyNine: I never thought I'd see the day that you called Machiatto Guy a saint. So your latte monster, what was he like? Aside from murdering a perfectly good coffee, what did he do to get you this mad?

For the record, Connor was going to express that he wasn't mad, just, conflicted. He'd expected the attractive stranger to at least have an okay taste in coffee. What came out instead of all that was a forlorn sigh.

"Nines, he was so handsome." He barely registered the use of the old nickname as he continued on his tangent, checking the fish again and adding the vegetables and garlic salt to the second pan. "Blue eyes, longer hair, he's going a little grey at the roots and he's built like a tree. Y'know briad shoulders, the works."

UnluckyNine: Just up your alley. Except he murdered his drink.

Connor gave his salmon another aggressive poke before flipping it. "He could have been the one! But he's a sociopath! Four shots of espresso... like, what kind of job requires that much caffeine," Connor sighed again, checking his vegetables. He might be being a little dramatic but all of thisbwas just frustrating, "I mean, I have no way of knowing if he even swings this way so its probably for the best."

He turned off both burners and turned to get a plate just to find them all dirty. Doing dishes got added to his list of things to do before class and he grabbed a cereal bowl deciding that would have to work. He set it beside the stove and checked for messages from Nines.

UnluckyNine: You also don't know that he doesn't l. Just because he needs to inject caffeine directly into his bloodstream doesn't mean he's a bad guy.

UnluckyNine: Use some of your charm and see how it goes. Latte murderer or not, he may be nice.

Connor rolled his eyes putting the mixed vegetables in the bowl, then the salmon and topping it with some soy sauce. "Richard, you been listening at all? He added four shots to an espresso less drink, and a medium one at that! Sure he's handsome, and like, everything I like in a guy, but he's an animal."

UnluckyNine: You have yet to describe him as 'three sleep raccoons in a trenchcoat' like you did with Machiatto Guy. So I'm inclined to believe he isn't all bad.

Connor didn't see the message until he got to his room and got his laptop set up. He settled in his with his back resting against the wall. Relaxed for the time being he clicked on the video icon knowing Richard preferred to see who he was talking to.

"Okay, so let's say you're right and he isn't all bad. What do I even say?" He cut into his salmon with his fork and took a bit letting his brother steer the conversation.

UnluckyNine: Hello would probably suffice. Make small talk, you're a barista. Get to know him, slowly.

Connor expected the sarcastic remark and motioned for him to continue with a handband matching eye roll. As tactless as Richard tended to be, he gave much better advice than Silas.

UnluckyNine: Alrifht alright, assuming he comes back, ask what he does for a living. See if it justifies murdering a perfectly good latte.

UnluckyNine: I have work in the morning so I'm going to call it a night. Good luck.

Richard worked at a library and seemed to enjoy it but he also worked early most days and unlike Connor, he actually needed a human amount of sleep to function so Connor let him go.

"Bye Nknes, thanks for listening." Connor waved before hanging up. He clicked onto Netflix and reclined against the wall. Tonight would be fine.

@yayen-chan

[letterboxd]

Truffle Hunter.

As Pig snuffles its way up Letterboxd’s best of 2021 ranks, Mitchell Beaupre hunts down writer-director Michael Sarnoski for a chat about some of the finer creative points of his Nicolas Cage-starring meditation on cookery and grief.

In a time when audiences know too many specific plot details of films months before they’re even released, the idea of a surprise sensation feels like a fleeting memory. Yet that’s exactly how one could describe Pig, the debut feature from director Michael Sarnoski. With minimal pre-release buzz and no flashy festival premiere, Pig is a film whose status has been created through sheer quality alone.

This is a true word-of-mouth smash, hailed by critics as one of the best films of the year, as well as quickly earning itself a high placement on our Top 50 of 2021. Jacob Knight praises the film as “an existential rumination regarding how people find meaning in a mostly meaningless world”, while Muriel declares it “the most unexpectedly wholesome movie I’ve seen in forever”. Not bad for a first feature.

Written by Sarnoski, from a story he developed with co-producer Vanessa Block, Pig opens on Rob (Nicolas Cage), a loner isolated in the woods with his truffle pig. Rob makes his living selling truffles to the eager and ambitious Amir (Alex Wolff), but when two people break into Rob’s home and steal his animal companion, he must do whatever it takes to be reunited with his only friend.

A rough day deserves a decent vin rouge.

While that setup led many to give Sarnoski’s film the moniker “John Wick with a pig” when the trailer dropped, the story ends up charting a course away from genre thrills and towards something else entirely. Pig is an exploration of grief, loneliness and compassion, featuring one of the finest performances of Nicolas Cage’s illustrious career.

Raised in Milwaukee, Sarnoski and co-producer Block met in college before working together on the documentary short The Testimony, which focused on the largest rape tribunal in the history of the Democratic Republic of the Congo. That film made it onto the shortlist for the 2016 Oscars, putting the two of them on a path that would lead to their breakthrough opportunity with Pig.

Sarnoski spoke with us about the origins of Pig, the long-term impacts of loss in his own life, the joy of hand-cranked pasta and Bruce Springsteen.

Congratulations on the film! How has it felt seeing this outpouring of love coming for your first feature? Michael Sarnoski: It’s been amazing. Everyone who made this movie felt for themselves that it was special, and we all put a lot of care into it. We also knew that it was a risk, a strange film we figured would hit right for some people, but then plenty of others would think it was boring and weird. We’ve been very pleasantly surprised that it’s a small minority of people who feel that way.

What was the seed of the story that would eventually sprout to become Pig? I had this image in my head of an old man in the woods with his truffle pig. There was something sweet and tragic about that. Then I began asking questions about who this guy is and why he’s out there alone in the woods. What’s his backstory? It all evolved from there.

While the first act inhabits that “John Wick with a pig” space that people were perhaps expecting from the trailer, the story then takes a swerve and becomes a somber, thoughtful character study. Could you speak about navigating that unique arc with your storytelling? We never set out to try and subvert that John Wick sort of genre. We knew that we were playing with that lone-cowboy idea of a film and some of those tropes, but we never wanted to poke fun at that or switch people’s expectations in some sense by choosing Nic to star. We never wanted to “surprise” people by making a quiet Nic Cage movie. It was always just about these characters, what this story is, what we’re trying to explore. I think if we had tried to be subversive it would have come off as hokey.

Silence plays a key part in the film, as so much is being said in those spaces between the dialogue and action. How did you want to utilize the impact of saying more with silence? From early on, we always knew it was going to be a very silent film, and that followed all the way through the edit. Some of us wanted that opening to start out the way it’s done in the movie, where it’s totally silent and the music only comes in at the very end, while others were worried that people would get bored with it. The argument against that was that if they’re going to get bored with that, then they’re going to get bored with the rest of the movie. So, we might as well just lean into it, and let them know what it’s going to be.

From there we gauged how we wanted to approach the silence throughout. There’s some beautiful music in the film that Alexis Grapsas and Philip Klein did an incredible job with that allowed us to bring this beauty and splendor into the scenes. But there were also a lot of really quiet moments where we wanted the audience to be focused on the faces of the characters, and really be feeling the space and letting the sounds of the forest, or wherever we were, come across.

Nicolas Cage, his knife skills, and cinematographer Patrick Scola.

Along with the faces, you focus a lot on hands in the film. Whether it’s in scenes of violence or making food, there’s a real emphasis on what hands are capable of. Where did the inspiration for that come from? Nic was very into the idea of conveying artistry through your hands. He spent a lot of time with local chefs to try and get the vibe of how they moved and how they worked. He was always practicing knife skills in his room. I was constantly waiting for the AD to come up and tell me that we can’t use Nic today because he cut off a finger, but thankfully that never happened. Nic really sold that emphasis on the hands. Those shots could have felt empty if it wasn’t for him. I still am surprised watching some of the little hand choices he made.

I remember there was one shot where we didn’t get it on the day. So, we set it up with his stand-in, and just had him wearing his gloves. We all watched it, and it just wasn’t the same. Nic agreed, and so we reset the entire thing just to get that one shot with his hands in there instead. It was totally worth it. He’s an incredible actor, and it comes through every part of him.

Cage is an actor with an almost otherworldly mythos about him, which allows people to sometimes forget what a tremendous performer he’s always been. What was your experience in building a relationship with him, not just as an actor, but also as a human being? I only have positive things to say. That’s not just a gimmick. From the moment he read the script, he was interested, and he really responded to the character. He was committed to bringing the script to life, and was extremely respectful towards everyone on set. He had no reason to respect me. I’m a first-time director. He could have been a total diva. He could have been whatever he wanted to be, and we still would have paid him and been happy with his performance.

He was very kind, and maybe some of this came from the character, but he was also kind of somber and quiet in general on set. At the same time, he can also be very playful and sweet, even though he was trying to remain in the mood of the character. He set the tone, in a way, for the whole crew. A crew could easily look at a first time director and decide to just slack off and scrape by, because I wouldn’t have even known the difference. The fact that Nic treated me and the material with such respect really trickled down, and was so valuable to the film.

We shot the whole thing in twenty days, so if there had been any weak link with someone not doing their job or not being totally on top of it, we would have been screwed. I credit a lot of that to Nic, and him treating this with an incredible amount of professionalism. I think that’s where a big part of his long career comes from. He’s an incredible actor, but he also takes the art form seriously, treating it as both an artist and as this being his job, knowing that you have to do both in order to get what you need across.

Do you have a favorite Nicolas Cage performance? Other than Pig, of course. There are so many incredible ones. I really love Moonstruck. I saw that a couple of years ago, right before we officially cast him, when I was going through some of his ones that I hadn’t seen. Part of it I think is because I’m half-Italian, and I felt like it was showing me a side of my life that I never realized because my Italian family is on the east coast, and we moved out to Wisconsin when I was very young. I never got to be a part of that kind of thick Italian family, and seeing that on screen gave me a taste of what that would have been like. I loved him in that role. He was the perfect balance of sincere and sentimental, and also over the top when he needed to be.

Grub’s up.

Speaking of being Italian, Pig gets deep into the transformative power of food, and of the right meal. Has food always been an important part of your life? Definitely. I’ve never worked in restaurants. The closest thing was when I worked at a snack bar at a summer camp, which was very fun and also kind of a nightmare in its own way. I think most of the importance of food for me came from when my grandma lived with us. It was after my dad passed away, when I was a little kid, and she became this sort of old Italian cook in the house who was using food as this language of love and also as a sort of control. It had a lot wrapped up in it, this sense that we’re going to have family dinners to prove that everything is fine.

I think any Italian family is that way, but especially in that situation, having that presence come into the house when I was a kid, it made food quite charged for me. It was both a form of bonding and love, but also that control. That was very important to me. As I got older she taught me how to cook some things, and I became interested in that. I had a lot of friends who were great cooks and taught me how to do different things. I’m not an amazing cook, but I love cooking.

I love that act of making something that’s about to disappear. I think if you can be okay with that, and put a lot of time and care into that, it’s kind of a therapeutic thing to do. Accepting transience is a big part of cooking.

What’s your favorite dish to cook? I would say over the pandemic I really got into making lasagne. I had my grandma’s old hand-crank pasta maker, so I was enjoying making my own pasta and lasagne with that. I don’t know if I could pick one favorite dish, but that is definitely one that contributed quite a bit to putting on the Covid pounds.

Rob (Cage) and Amir (Alex Wolff) discuss their business relationship.

There’s a scene in the film where Rob and Amir go to a restaurant and Rob has a conversation with the chef there, who used to work for him, about the idea of losing our sense of identity when we give up on our dreams in order to fill this role that society expects of us. Is that something that you personally connected with? Yeah, people ask me a lot about what I think of the high-end cuisine world, and I have to say that I wasn’t trying to solely express that this world is garbage and phony. I was looking at it as another kind of art form. Any time you have an art form that combines someone’s personal passion with some sort of economy there are going to be conflicts to navigate. Whether you’re a painter, director, writer, whatever, those are going to be things you have to juggle. How true to yourself are you going to stay?

For myself, I’ve definitely found that when I try to focus on doing something that I care about, that’s kind of all I have control over and that’s what I should focus on. Pig was that for me. This isn’t the kind of script that you write where you’re expecting a big payday. It’s this weird movie that for some reason really means something to me.

The scene climaxes with Rob saying the line, “We don’t get a lot of things to really care about”. What about this movie exemplifies the things that you really care about in your life? It’s so many things, and even more things came from going through the process of actually making it and falling in love with Portland. It’s become even more than what it was initially intended to be. I mentioned earlier that my dad passed away when I was a kid, and the most personal aspect of the film for me was exploring that idea of what grief does to us long-term.

As I’ve gotten older I’ve been watching how my family members changed the way they interact with the world and built their perception of the world around some aspect of grief. It’s not those immediate effects of shock or sadness. It’s how those things ingrain into your worldview. I became much more conscious of how I was doing that in my own life. That was the deepest, most general thing that I was bringing to it, and that I was exploring personally through the film.

As far as specific things that I care about, I think I have all the classic things. I care about my family, and my friends. I care about the world, which is why this year has been so devastating. I don’t have one single pig. I think we all have a few different pigs in our lives.

Director Michael Sarnoski on the set of ‘Pig’.

Another scene that really stands out is the one in which Rob returns to his old home and sits with this young boy, having a conversation about a persimmon tree that used to be there. Talk to me about the significance of that moment for Rob. One of the things I love about that scene is that it seems so simple, kind of quiet and basic, but it’s getting into a lot of different things. I will say one thing about that scene. That was the first scene that we shot on the first day of filming. That kid was great, but filming with a child on your first day of your first feature was very much a moment of wondering what I had gotten myself into.

That scene does a few things. I won’t get into spoiler territory, but for starters he’s going back to his old house, so it’s his first attempt to really look at his past in the face, and to acknowledge that. I like that in that moment this is also one of the first times that we hear him speak romantically of food, because those things are very tethered to each other.

We get both the sense that there was a past, a personal path that he left behind, but intricately involved in that was how he interacted with food and his art. It’s the first time that we hear him acknowledge who he was in a way that’s okay. He tells the kid his name, and he’s acknowledging his identity that he’s been trying to hide from or ignore. Through doing that, it’s engaging with his passions and how that tethers everything together. I also thought it was cute explaining what persimmons were to a little kid.

I’ve got to ask you about the use of Bruce Springsteen’s ‘I’m On Fire’ in a very meaningful moment. What made that the perfect song choice for that scene? Obviously, who’s singing it is very meaningful. I liked that song, though, because it’s different from the sappy direction we could have gone with that moment. There’s something very passionate about ‘I’m On Fire’, of course, and it’s a pretty sexual song. It’s really charged, but it also has this kind of ethereal quality to it that’s seductive in a non-sexual way. It washes over you, and it feels very mystical. This sounds so “film talk”-y, but I liked that meeting of that transcendent, abstract feeling with that immediate sense of passion and love and obsession.

Finally, what’s the film that made you want to become a filmmaker? Probably Sam Raimi, his first Spider-Man movie. That was the first time I realized what directors do. I had a very strong association with Spider-Man growing up as a comic-book fan, and I was seeing how someone was filtering their own understanding of this character. Raimi coming from his horror background and being into the nitty gritty filmmaking with practical effects and everything, I got this understanding of how a director touches a film and shapes it.

Related content

Steve’s list of pigs in film

Melissa’s list of films featuring food, chefs, bakers, restaurants, cooking, hospitality, hotels, wineries, grocers

Rachel West discovers Nicolas Cage is her most-watched actor of all time

Letterboxd’s Official Top 50 of 2021—Jack Moulton’s list

Follow Mitchell on Letterboxd

‘Pig’ is currently in US cinemas via NEON, and available to buy/rent on digital.