The whole being dead thing
(MUSICAL) BEETLEJUICE X GN! PLUS SIZE! MORTICIAN! READER
Beej being really into the readers body, fat4fat bitches rise up. Beetlejuice is a tummy guy.
+nsfw
- Death was something you were well acquainted with. Working with the dead like it was second nature.
- and to you it was, underneath florescent lights and protective gear you felt at home.
- you'd had run-ins with the recently deceased, it wasn't uncommon, in fact a representative of the underworld had given you a couple dozen copies of 'handbook for recently deceased'.
- ghosts were just a part of your job, so when Beetlejuice showed up you didn't think too much of it.
- until he stayed around.
"So why exactly do you stay here with me?" You ask, hands busy gently applying a layer of foundation on an older woman's face. Beetlejuice hums.
"I just like the vibe."
- one night after a particularly rough day (even as a seasoned mortician some things can still get to you.) you smoked a joint in the car before you left the parking lot.
-irresponsible? 100%, but you don't do it often, so Beetlejuice is high-key surprised.
- you're his favorite breather, so of course you smoke weed! And also a lil worried, but he's not exactly sure why yet.
- you end up falling asleep in the car and when you wake up you're leaning on him, he's just kinda looking at you with wide unblinking eyes.
- like a cat focusing on prey?? But y'know kinda lovingly .
- acts differently from that point
- he stops staying there for the 'vibe' he starts saying he just wants to hangout.
- outside of being at the funeral home.
- at YOUR house.
- he still came and went while you worked.
- one night you spark up maybe a little too much, and are just a bit too touchy, and- ah shit he's hard.
- you kiss him; he tries sobering you up. You think he's mad at you. You fucked up.
- you wake up the next morning and Beej checks up on you, and you apologize like crazy and low-key confess.
- he kisses you this time and you reciprocate. And soon his hands are wandering all over your body, and he finds your belly and it's soft and squishy and he can grab at it and and and-
-he short circuits, he can't produce new blood you assume so when it goes to his dick he def gets light headed.
- lets out just this fucking noise from deep in his throat, he's so turned on man.
- you grind on him and he almost cums in his pants 🤩.
- your hands find his body, and you run your hands across his folds and just hold his love handles
- you fuck so hard that night you genuinely have to call of work because you can't walk.
- if you're trans masc he sucks T dick like a binki btw! Runs his tongue over the tip and slurps it down with the filthiest fucking noises, literally bobbing his head up and down, moaning when you pull his hair.
- T shots are followed by head, he can't go without it.
- trans femmes he sucks girl cock like it's his fucking job, will literally only come up to call you a good girl and finger you :3!
- what I'm trying to say is he's super good at giving head, and it's mostly bc he doesn't need to breathe, so he could go until your legs shake and you're crying 🩷.
- also takes it up the ass like a fucking CHAMP, whining for it and his voice literally cracking. (Oh God if you're teasing him, don't get me started, "you take my strap/cock so good pretty boy." "MORE PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE!")
- he pulls hair, scratches and bites, no you can't convince me otherwise.
-it sparks up... Interesting conflicts in your brain. "It's... not necrophilia, right? Technically??? You're dead, but not like... Dead dead, I can talk to you, and you can consent?"
- he's soft for you.
- but also you'll probably need to wrangle him into the bath.
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