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#ugh why arent they real </3
feli026 · 4 months
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Some Igor doodles ft shaggy and caine :P
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autisticlee · 1 year
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it always pisses me off when people start ghosting me and completely cut me off and think i'm annoying because I didn't ~get the hint~ all because they're too much of a coward to be straightforward and honest with me!!!!
i'll keep asking about a thing or when we are hanging out or try to converse with them, because their response is always excuses and not straight up "no" so how am I supposed to know?! either short responses of 1-5 words that I can't really respond to or things like "I'm busy this weekend/I'm too tired today/I forgot about it/we can try next time/I'll get back to you and le you know" are apparently all hints and lies to hide the truth. what they really mean when they tell me this is "no, stop asking. stop talking to me. I do not want to hang out with you or talk to you anymore"
why can't you just say that?! it will save you the annoyance of me asking you 20 times because i took your words at face value. your excuses sound temporary and you didn't get back to me so maybe you forgot. there are rare times people say these things and it's the truth or they really did forget!!!! when I say it, it's the truth. I also have a bad memory. you can't just suddenly ghost me for that! it's on you if you aren't being honest with me. it's up to you to be straightforward and tell the truth so you don't waste both our time. (what's worse is this is usually one of the first things I tell people when we meet. that I need then to be straightforward and honest. they promise they will but that's also a lie)
ghosting is so cruel (when the other person has no bad intentions/isnt causing harm). more cruel than telling me to my face you hate me and never want to speak again! i actually prefer that, so i at least know and can give up on your useless ass and stop wasting my time. don't give me false hope when i'm really excited to be friends and hang out, don't waste my time and energy and efforts, and don't lead me on with lies only to crush my entire soul when I find the truth much later. just say it and get it over with!!!! it's your fault if I annoy you by "not taking the hint" because there was no hint, lying isn't a hint. spill the truth and don't blame me for it!!!!!!
this is why i've given up with people and now only give attention to the ones who contact me first every time continuously, and I put little effort into anything anymore. I know that will end up making some people give up on me by thinking i dont care. but I'm tired of wasting my time and energy on the people who put no effort into me. you must prove yourself and keep doing it or I won't try at all. the people who ghost me and hurt me are to blame. yes, I live a very lonely existence with maybe one friend I talk to once every week or two for a total of 5 minutes at most. yes I wish I had more connections or closer ones. but i'm SO FUCKING TIRED. i'm tired of trying so much and so hard just for people to shit on my efforts and disrespect my needs and boundaries!!!!!!
why should I keep trying when it always ends bad and adds yet another layer to my trauma.
#it happens every time!!!!!!!! i dont havw the spoons amd energy to keep giving these people every piece of me. theres nothing left!!!!!#people always tell me keep trying dont give up dont cut yourself off from everyone etc#but everyone cuts ME off so wtf am i supposed to do????? keep wasting energy and brain power just to let them keep doing it?!#its like if you spend a year carefully crafting a custom blanket for someone. putting in all your love and time and energy. give it to them#AND THEY SER IT ON FIRE AND WALK AWAY. NOT EVEN ACKNOWLEDGING HOW HARD YOU WORKED OR ANYTHING#that's what its like every time i try with people. it's a waste and i never get anything good out of it 😭#so why would it be wrong to protect myself by taking the part of the cold and unresponsive one for once? act like them instead?#no try or give someone much attention until they do like i always did and put in a ton of effort and keep it going?#if someone tries as hard as i always did then they must be good and worthy of keeping around and putting some effort into myself right?#ugh idk. i hate all of this and humans arent good at being good friends and im tired of trying to be one too#perhaps me not trying will make people think i dont care about them so they give up still anyway. well oh well#that means they didnt try gard enough and would have given up anyway. if i dont get attached or care much first then it hurts less#i know everyone tries to make me feel better by saying stuff like the right ones exist and my people are out there or whatever#but i will not believe it until i see it. because it's possible that is not true. it's possible i'll never have real/close friends#what then????? what do i do about that?? people love telling me i'll find the right people but no one steps up to try being that one#this all sounds doom and gloom but I'm just venting. in reality i just give it 3 tries.#if a person makes excuses or doesnt respond or doesnt carry the conversation 3 times on a row i will give up and it's their move.#if they dont come forward at all then we are done and i will never reach out to or speak to them again. if they want me they can prove it#lee rambles#autistic#autism#actually autistic#autism things#autistic friendship#friendship problems#loneliness#communication#cptsd#rsd#the fun thing about the cptsd and rsd combo is when people do these things i get hit with a wave if every past experience and relive it 🙃
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osarina · 6 months
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(uh, this is rlly long im so sorry qwq)
OMG THAT LAST CHAPTER HAD ME FEELING SM CARINA U CANT DO THIS TO ME !!!! LITERALLY THE FIRST FEW PARAGRAPHS IN I HADTA WALK AROUND BC I WAS SO OVERWHELMED I LOVED IT SM !!! N THOSE LAST FEW LINES. DONTDOTHISTOME I S A W THE "BEAST AU COMPLIANT" TAG ON UU IM GONNA SOB MY EYES OUT DURING IT I JUST KNOW !!!
gonna leave some of my fave few lines n my thoughts abt them from this chapter (ok these arent all of em, bc if i put all of em it'd be the whole 50k words of this series SO ITS JUST THIS CHAPTER)
"because how could he possibly belong amongst people who are so unfailingly good that it makes his tainted heart stick out like a sore thumb?"
STOP NO DONT DO THIS TO MEEEEEE throughout the whole fic u perfectly captured his thought process n how he denies his own capacity for change n how he HAS changed from when he was 18 BUT THIS LINE MADE ME TEAR UPPPPPP
"He is so completely and irrevocably in love with you that Dazai doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to live in a world without you. The thought alone makes his skin crawl and his chest cave in."
self-explanatory
“Are you calling me ugly?” 
u gorgeous, gorgeous man ilysm yes you look like a rat but i'll swaddle u up in blankets n clean u up
the whole graveyard scene. DO YOU WANT ME TO CRY HELLO
“You were a kid, Osamu. You’re not some incarnate of evil for ending up where you did, you were failed by all of the adults in your life,”
ok nvm crying this hit me like a truck
"Humans cannot live without a heart, so if he’s to give you his, it’s only fair that you give him your own—though realistically, yours has already been his for a long time."
i feel like this mightve been ur fave line, but if it wasnt IT STILL IS MINE BC OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD QWQ
ranpos lil rant was so funny he's literally me frfr
“Yeah… ha, look at us, in jail at the same time! Couple goals, huh?” 
i giggled
PLS READER INVITING EVERYONE JUST TO AVOID GETTING INTERROGATED UMMM RELATABLE LMFAO
these are just some of them BUT JUST IN GENERAL, UR WRITING IS JUST MAGICAL ITS EVERYTHING IVE EVER WANTED TO READ N I LOVELOVELOVEEEE THIS SERIES N ALL UR WORKS (n u /p) SM !!! I CANT WAIT FOR UNREAL UNEARTH, I JUST KNOW IT'LL BE AMAZING !!!
RED HOW MANY TIMES MUST I TELL YOU NOT TO APOLOGIZE I LITERALLY ADORE YOU IM GOING TO WEEP OMG
honestly the first scene of dazai’s pov was one of my favs to write because it pisses me off so much whenever he’s excluded from the ada panels in the manga fjsjdjsjjd so i NEEDED the opportunity to hit home that that is his FAMILY idc what asagiri says the ada is that boys family and he deserves it 🥹🤞
UGHHHHH STOP BECAUSE WHENEVER I WRITE CANONZAI ITS SO HARD TO KEEP ON THAT THIN LINE OF HIS INABILITY TO ACCEPT HIS OWN GROWTH WHILE ALSO HAVING HIM ACKNOWLEDGING ODA’S LAST WISH FOR HIM SO I REWROTE SO MANY OF HIS POVS SEVERAL TIMES BECAUSE I FELT LIKE I WASNT GRASPING IT ALL PROPERLY
the graveyard scene was one of the 3 scenes i started writing for 🥹 i literally was weeping when i finally got to it
AND ALSO THE YOU WERE A KID LINE UGHHHHHHHH BRO when i tell you that’s something that i literally want to scream at him and shake his shoulders like he was FOURTEEN WHEN MORI BROUGHT HIM IN AFTER HIS ATTEMPT !!!!! FOURTEEN !!!!! HE WAS A BABY IT MAKES ME SO SAD WHEN HE FRAMES HIMSELF AS SOME IRREDEEMABLE MONSTER WHEN HE ONLY TURNED OUT THE WAY HE DID BECAUSE HE HAD NO ADULTS IN HIS LIFE SETTING HIM ON THE RIGHT TRACK ugh im gonna weep again i will always be dazai’s #1 defender, i will fight him himself idc he was only a lil baby :’)
oh my god fun fact i actually almost deleted that line about the heart, i don’t even know why like i was rereading it right before i post and i second guessed myself because i was like ‘i don’t think it rlly flows’ but then i decided against removing it because i liked the line in general SO IM WEEPING AGAIB
bro ranpo needs a promotion for real the headaches this man must get because of people not listening to him 💀
HDOSJDJSJDJJD THE COUPLES GOAL LINE WHEN I TELL YOU I SNORTED WRITING IT HELPPPPP I WAS GIGGLING SO HARD
RED ILYSM IM BUNDLING YOU IN THE SOFTEST BLANKETS AND GIVING YOU A FOREHEAD KISS
i’m so excited for unreal unearth like honestly it’s my pride and joy, i’m so pleased with how my beast!dazai characterization has come out so far and i’m hoping everyone else is going to like it too 🥹 if not ill simply die HAHAH JK JK JK no but really i’m so very excited for it
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echoesofadream · 8 months
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Review as I’m watching: he looks like a wet cat
He is being dragged along because he’s weak
I like his blind eye
He’s very beautiful when he’s dirty
Uh he’s not my type when he is seen thru the camera. Interesting
Oh! It reminded me I wanted to go buy cake I’m gonna do that 🍰
Oh rough section but at least not looking at each other properly
I’d kms if keita ever looked properly at a woman
Ok they are looking a bit but it’s fine the cube came
Thank you cube I’m in the cube’s side
Why is he wrecking the cube he’s weak
Remembered his hairline
Is he dying?
He went up in the air
I like the outfits he suits big black coat veryr well
Wdym love wins all. They lost. So they didn’t love?
Ok that’s it. Nice song
I LOVE YOU
thank you for this also i like him most when he was dirty one blind eye zombie looking too and i love the torn outfit hes wearing he looks good in it
but when hes seen through the camera i only like him sometimes like he looks good with the w*dding suit etc
hELP me im the cube i would also kill him if he did those things and he did so im the cube and im killing him
yeah he looked at her so i am kms i cant believe he looked at her he didnt even look at the bp girl in those videos he just looked depressed here he looks happy but its acting just acting ugh king of actingwow. maybe if i try hard enough i can appreciate this sad love story like im trying to have this mindset that straight romance in media is like a metaphor for love, irl straight people arent real thats just what they call my attraction to taehyung and the like
HELPPPPPPPPPPPP hairline ...<///3 dont remind me ugh he'll get hair transplants or something hes rich...
He doees he looks so fuckinggggg good i need him hes mine mine MINE mine mine minei cant believe he let himself be touched like that he has no inhibitions one day he'll play an actual relationship with female love interest on a kdrama and kiss her on camera and it will be in my best interest to Not look at it i have a stomachache
Lol clearly love does NOT win all. fun fact original title was "love wins" but iu had to change it due to queerbaiting accusations.
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Its kind of sad how ill probably never fully know what's going on in my brain. I will always be just some flavor of mentally ill, with my brain being alphabet soup.
like. Emory, Ketrill, and Jester feel Different than my other paras.
With Emory, it's by nature of design. He's supposed to know more than my other paras, have a "mysterious" factor to him, his whole thing is that he Knows.
And Ketrill's technically never appeared in my daydreams. I don't think. More like a para "represents" him. Less like an actor and more like a fancast, if that makes sense. It does to me so whatever. Actually, to elaborate: instead of "[actor] is cast as [character]", with Ketrill & my paras its more like "[actor] would probably do a good job at playing [character] if given the chance".
Jester ... gosh. He was also different, from the start. He was made to be my opposite, a "self insert" inspired by a movie I had just seen. I made a post a while ago about the vocaloid song "Magic Mirror" being how I viewed our relationship, which is still true.
But tbh now that I think about it, it's true in another way, too: the two vocaloids featured/singing are Len & Rin, a pair of twins. and I've always kinda imagined myself as a twin? for felt like I should be one? idk. they feature heavily in my daydreams, and I feel a deep sense of longing that's so different than the usual "longing for your paras to be real" thing that most Daydreamers go through at one point or another. instead of "ugh wow i wish they were real" it's "you need to be real why arent you real i am empty without you".
sorry. tangent. I've been going through a lot of self-doubt lately and overanalyzing my Thoughts & Feelings about all of this. I still don't know everything but I feel like I can confidently say that those 3 are more than just paras. I'm tired so I'm not gonna comb through terminology, but I think they're somewhere within veritbond, soulbond, and parative. maybe parabond? maybe all three idk.
uhm. this was supposed to be a #vent about my shitty brain idk why i did all that lmao bye ✌️
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weirdcat1213 · 1 year
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trigun bookclub time :D volume 2 thoughts
chap 00.1
-vash's method of meditation is the only one that's valid in my eyes/j
-3 seconds of meditating vs 3 hours of training...huh...i wonder...why is that...and what...that says about him...
-hes bad at chess hes like me fr fr
-yey we love a day without casualties :D
chap 00.2
-the bit about us taking shelter on technology but still not knowing what the future holds...yeah that feels timeless now huh
-vash don't go there! oh no he has earbuds he cant hear me (that would literally happen to me tho)
-i love that panel where no one says anything after the girl is like "yeah i can give you pocket money." nice representation of the irritation people feel towards that kind of people. they arent mad just really tired of that bs
-oh man thats actually pretty horrible (page 23)
-"and i think of nothing but love and peace" besides that we know your head is empty but we love you so its ok
-yeah vash show her the real world
-interesting that he makes her see the chance of her dad dying (he didnt know what was gonna happen) which makes sense cuz she cant run from the truth anymore but its also interesting cuz if we was able to not see it he would. he hates seeing people dying and yet he watches and makes others watch. i dont think its about "if i have to, you have to as well" but more about her seeing the consequences of violence (what her father did) and the cycle of hate so she doesnt repeat it. idk.
chap 1
-rem coming out of his coat....hm....
-weird man coming
-YEAH SEND HIM TO HELL >:D
-if rem is holding him back you say...hmmm...i will go back to that later
-well thats creepy
chap 2
-my boi is in jail nooooooooooooo
-you can feel the size of the ship with one panel nightow is ridiculously talented when creating big spaces, like the sandsteamer shot in the last volume
-..... :c
-my babygirl :c
-i like he started the flashback angry as hell and then it turned into sadness cuz even if he makes knives pay nothing will bring rem back
-also the literal ship crashing into his memories what if I [redacted]
-SEE LOOK AT THAT SHIT! SPACE FEELS MASSIVE AND ITS LITERALLY JUST THE PLANET AND THE SHIP
-aaaand hes angry as hell again cuz the memory finished with knives. interesting
-dont look at me with those kind eyes, we saw you
-YEY ITS DIABLO TIME :D go get em
chap 3
-aw cmon :c
-and there goes the arm
-hey >:[ dont call my girl milly an idiot
-ugh you can feel how fucking stressed out he is ahhhhhhhhh
-ah yes, we love seeing how right knives is...
-huh, i wonder if knives is smiling cuz before he was like "nah she was stupid like the rest" but since she got to correct the ships's trajectory he got a bit of respect for her in the end
-is monev vs vash supposed to be like david and goliath? hm
-my god thats fucking beautiful
-also i dont think thats a ghost but maybe like her presence? like vash is remembering her and her kindness
-AH I HATE THAT I HATE THAT. THE CHAPTER IS CALLED FRAGILE, ENDS UP WITH VASH CRYING AND THE "rem" IS SO LITTLE THAT IS ONLY MEANT FOR US AND VASH TO BE AWARE OF IT WHAT IF I CRIED A RIVER AHHHHHH
chap 4
-oh meryl...oh honey...sweetie...
-the scars appear :D yey :D
-meryl is kinda asking him "arent you tired of being nice dont you want to go apeshit" but not really and i like that
-yknow what meryl is right pls go away and live a quiet life pls, ik whats coming but just thinking about it....
-yee ik the reason why but still >:v
-oh....oh i actually forgot about that...oh
-"rem didnt sacrifice her life for a world like that" im tearing up actually and idk why...its been a hard week
-lmao hes so mad at vash
-yeah hunt him down babygirl >:D
chap 5
-....metal >:D
-they deserved it btw
-huh thats actually kinda nice of him i forgot
-ofc he would blame vash for that, then again vash makes all of us at least a little bit soft i think
chap 6
-i love you vash that takes his sweet time to process traumatic situations, yes that was scary
-vash saying "im the deathwish" means a lot to me as an mcr fan lmao. i will think more about that later tho
-HES HEREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
-YES YOU ARE A PRIEST OMG WHY AM I THIS EXCITED
-THEY MEET, OMG THEY ARE MEETING! AMAZING!
-STOP BLUSHING BRO LIKE AHHHHHHHHHHHHH
-WHY ARE YOU TOUCHING HIS CHIN LIKE THAT YO
-"go home or go to hell" oh im getting that on a tattoo one day actually, so metal
-...cmon, me me big boi
-THAT SMILE, THAT DAMN SMILE im gonna jump off my local cliff
-vash in the beginning saying he can read people and then wolfwood comes and READS HIM LIKE ITS NOTHING
chap 7
-"is that a friend of yours" he looks so offended lmao
-ahhhh that must be so scary, he already has knives to worry about but the fact not everyone can see legato makes his job harder ahhhhh
-bye baby ily (hes my son that i only share with a couple of other ww enjoyers)
-CAN YOU STOP BEING GAY FOR 2 MINUTES
-OH THAT PANEL IS SO GOOD (also even more princess coded, like looking at really from a castle idk)
-GUYS GUYS MY WIFE IS HERE
-i keep forgetting hes missing his little arm :c
-lmao wolfwood is right, i wouldnt go to a church all the way there :b
-yeah and shes hot while teleporting all over the place
-ok but shes really fucking cool, despite wanting to kill my comfort character, yknow how these things go
-OHOHOHOO THAT PANEL WITH VASH FOCUSING IS AMAZING
-YESSSSS, SO METALLLLL
chap 8
-aaaand...there goes my wife
-ahhhhhh he looks so little :c
-OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HES COMING, HES NEAR
-idk ww :c idk when will it end
-OH WOW OH SHIT I FORGOT ABOUT THAT
-yeah right i dont like this part :b (its not bad just personal stuff)
-ok he do be looking pretty tho, i wonder if its a family thing
-YEAH MERYL SMACK THAT MF
-im a ball of rugged paper and my feelings are nothing...thanks nightow ily
-oh wait...he actually thought that was the end...thats so fucking smart nightow...wow i never considered that....
-aw babygirl :c but i cant even imagine how that must feel, how much hate he feels towards knives rn
-i think besides the "he called me by my name" meryl and milly let him go cuz they just felt he was going to matter what, like you can feel vash and his unstoppable energy on those pages
-oh hes so fucking pretty
-WAIT I NEVER NOTICED THAT BUT YEAH THAT WAS ON STAMPEDE EP 3 HOLY FUCK, THEY SAID THE SAME THING
-knives just fucking reads vash like an open book its incredible and it makes me so sad cuz vash cant escape, he cant hide nothing, not in front of knives
-he cant be knives without the good old gaslighting >:D
-the yelling throughout the page is amazing
-vash is crying noooooooooooooooo :c
-NO. STAY AWAY FROM ME, EVIL PANEL THAT HAUNTS MY DREAMS
-also :c
-im not too sure of what happened with his legs but ok sure
-im afraid my babygirl cant give you an answer ww, i dont think he knows
-.....why is the world so mean to him :c
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thegeminisage · 1 year
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they call it the river of the dead bc i died 10000 times trying to get korok seeds here
ANOTHER shrine in a cave on the great plateau. 10/10 i love that
i keep getting nothing but shields in chests and its starting to piss me off. i dont use them much, i havent broken a single one this whole game. give me literally ANYTHING else!!
died in the shrine when i was alllmost done. smh
DIED AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!
deeply tempted to turn around and leave but No. i'm so close
I FUCKING. GOT IT. FUCK THAT SHRINE!!!!
placed one of my travel medallions at the REAL temple of time. i never have to walk back here again lol
not that i need to come back...i'm finishing up the great plateau korok hunt right here. i have one left that starts elsewhere and ends on the great plateau but im at nearly 200 seeds rn and ive been making myself cuckoo bananas hunting seeds so i deserve a sidequest break. i'm thinking the rito bridge is a good place 2 start
BUT FIRST, MY AMIIBO! i keep foprgetting to do these lol
YOOOOOO mirror of twilight fabric!!! sexy
AND demon king fabric.....
accidentally spawned another epona. rode hr out to where the other horses were so she has community support lol
AWWW there's another monument near the great plateau...
ok, so i talked to karson in lookout landing ages back abt building this bridge. i think now they need supplies?
oh, i like how these guys refer to each other by name! i love the community feeling in totk...the way everybody wants to be a helper...
oh lmao i literally have enough wood already <3 maybe this is why they made trees enemies, to give us reasons to chop them up so we dont have to level entire forests at a time
OH HE SAID ACES!!!! good for him
SCREAM this dialogue. wings come in handy! or...wingy! don't sit your tail there, it's a support beam, not a perch! chaotic gay people <3 happy pride <3
had the brief thought "since i'm in hebra i should get some korok seeds here" no <3 not without <3 snow boots <3
which i havent seen any sign of...UGH i hope they arent still in gerudo desert...
im going to hateno!! i've been meaning to give this guy acorns for his cow feed for foreverrr
but, to do the school quest, i need to swing by kakariko first...thank goodness4 fast travel
ugh so many sidequests in kakariko i wanna do but i feel like i should wait until this 5th sage nonsense SIIIGH
ok, got the pic of the tapestry in paya's house! also accidentally saw the cuccos running by, followed them to their hideout. extremely tense trying to bust thru the rock wall with them standing there. no way was i using yunobo
BUT i was at a perfect angle to take a ring ruins pic for the stable guy!
found lasli who needs the anti-gloom stuff...UGH i hate that nobody remembers link!!! ugh and i need milk for this which i dont have >:(
well, i bet there's some in hateno and i was going there anyway lol
NAYDRA WAS HERE WHEN I SPAWNED........snaged myself a scale. UGH i can't believe they fucked dragon farming i'm in such deep shit i don't have ANY parts
acorns delivered, milk received! omg nice he'll trade me anytime.......reminds me of the rito lady trading arrows for chillshrooms lol now THAT was a bargain
got my mirror of twilight fabric put on 💪
oh man it is LOVELY. it has a nice rainbow-pearl sheen to it...it might be my fav yet
time to go appease schoolchildren
scream that link is listening in on this calamity lecture like he wasn't the main character in it without so much as a single acknowledgement of it by this dude. yet another way theyre alienating old players by trying NOT to alienate new ones
this guy talking up the hero's achievements WITHOUT ACTUALLY MENTIONING THAT IT IS LINK. this is my villain origin story
oh boy. for the next lesson i have to get monster extract from tarrey town. i have the car quest there i never finished, but maybe i should do more shrines/seeds first...
i haven't been to the depths in awhile.
that is DEFINITELY the devil (and many korok seeds) talking. actually i can decide tomorrow bc i have to <3 go to bed
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dumbbitchfrommars · 1 year
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i finished bridgerton and im sad. im sad because i feel like lady danbury deserved more... and im scared that my life will end up like hers. i dont know. i feel like we all deserve more than a life without love. 
today was so hard. every day feels so hard lately. im so overwhelmed with emotions, and ive been punishing my sister. im sad that i wasted our time together being like this but she was annoying me too... but she doesnt deserve to feel like a problem, or like she has to step on eggshells around me. i keep on facing this darkside of myself and its disappointing and shameful. im selfishly angry and aggressive and mean. i need to loosen up on others, and be kinder, and warmer, and all those good things that i feel like arent being provided to me. im sad shes leaving tomorrow cause i dont know when well see each other again. probably in 3 months... i hope. last time was 6 months ago... it will fly by! 
in this economy its getting harder and harder to see the people we care about. but shes only a flight away...! i dont know. i guess its sad feeling so distanced again now that were changing and we dont talk as much. i want to be there for her but were going through entirely different situations. 
im frustrated by my lack of a backbone. i hate my job but i do nothing about it. UGH! i hate the types of men im attracting yet i dont send them away, i open my life to them. when i know that by doing so i leave no space for the keanu reaves/oscar isaac/tom hardy types that i know i want and deserve. UGH! what happened to the bad bitch with a good music taste, amazing style, sexy attitude and too cool for school vibes? i completely lowered myself to feel validated by pathetic boys, only to wonder why i feel like nothing when i realise their validation means nothing. in fact, it actually lowers my worth, because now i think that i belong in their league. 
i win at life when i realise my focus could be on myself instead of boys and relationships. i cant help it im a horny hopeless romantic! i miss the days where i was consumed by my stories enough to distract me from the real thing. now im indecisive over a dilf that i absolutely know is not the right decision for me.
anyways, yes, im sad and pathetic and wallowing in all my annoying and inconvenient emotions because im a woman and im definitely not living up to my full, amazing, beautiful, incredible, awesome potential. ONE DAY! one day. ugh. thats what makes it all so much worse, honestly. knowing everything im capable of, but sitting here idly being bored and drained by my lack of stimulation. its such an easy thing to fix, no? im surrounded by distractions. i just need discipline, to detach myself from this addiction to distraction. i managed to free myself from weed and bad people. even cigarettes, though that never really counted for me, i was never addicted, i am strong willed. i can free myself from this too! i am already so dedicated to my body, making myself the strongest i can be to feel my best and most confident. but the final piece of the puzzle is strengthening my mind, and my wit. wow. 
this feels like such a revelation now that ive managed to conceptualise it. like all this time ive been so lost, and confused, and wondering what was missing from my awareness, to help me understand what ive been doing wrong. its this! i need to dedicate myself to my mind. it will solve everything ive ever felt insecure about! i will be a better writer, i will be a better student, a better marine biologist, a better friend, a better guest, a better partner, a better employee, a better person. a better creative. and a better divine being. because with knowledge comes connection to all things...
im figuring it out. im on my own path and timeline. and ill take it step by step. and one day ill look back and smile and laugh and cry about the journey ive managed to complete, all on my own. always on my own. because i am a strong, independent, magical woman. with music to heal and soothe me, and those who came before me to teach me and guide me, and my loved ones to support me and celebrate me, i will accomplish everything i ever dreamed or wished for! like i always said so. i am determined. i am determined. i am capable of anything i put my mind to. i will expand my knowledge, and become a makeup artist, and become a marine biologist, and get my divers certificate, and do beautiful makeup for my beautiful friends, and create endless stories, and memories, and love, and acceptance, and nurture myself as a gorgeous flower only learning to bloom. 
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cheetomin · 6 years
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:)
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beomglocks · 4 years
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what yeonjun is like as a boyfriend
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warnings & other: no warnings except for falling in love with yeonjun, but is that so bad?, side note: no body asked for this but between college stress aka finals and daily life struggles this is the only thing i could manage to come up with so plz enjoy.
w/c: 2 more words and its 1K
jesus take the wheel
when you first meet him he’s flirting
biting his lips and licking them
raising his eyebrows and all like
????
calm down i don’t even know your name yet
very bold
so shameless when you first meet him
“you look like someone”
“oh really who?”
“my future partner ;)”
ngl you would be so put off by his confidence
but he knows when to tone it down and you’re like
“oh you’re actually tolerable!”
if youre shy then rip you
always trying to get you out of your comfort zone
probably does extra shit in public and you just have to laugh along nervously
then when yall are alone you scold him for embarrasing you and he’s like
“ok ok im sorry” *hug*
if youre confident like him youre both annoying
just kidding but thats real couple goals
everyone is jealous of yall
he’s so cocky
always showing you off
“hi everyone this is my partner!”
“yeonjun...we know...we’ve known ever since you introduced them 5 months ago”
thinks you’re the most beautiful human to ever grace the earth and it’s not even close
“seriously how did i end up with someone like you”
seems like the type of boyfriend to kiss the ground you walk on
*not to be confused with a simp*
yeonjun does not simp
he has morals
so you know how he tends to say “baby” a lot
yeah
thats his fav nickname for you and vise versa
omg he loves that nickname forreal
skinship
like i know i said beomgyu and skinship was a huge thing
but my god
yeonjun is on a whole other level
just comes up to you and annoys you with wanting to be close
hes so clingy
but will probrably pout and whine when youre clingy with him
“ahhh y/n you like me sooo much look at you clinging to me like this, leave me aloooooone”
obviously he doesnt mean it like cmon youre each others batteries
kissing you in public
im talking full on makeout sessions
“we’re in public...”
“ok and?”
literally just always all up on you
if youre someone who needs their space yall will CLASH
might even get into arguments because of this
serious arguments where you call him annoying
i feel like he will take it to heart if you call him that
nobody likes being called annoying :(
wont touch or talk to you for days
DAYS
thats dog years in your relationship
you have to apologize and really mean it
he’ll accept it if you kiss him
omg he’s so jealous
SO JEALOUS
doesn’t want people looking at you too long
dont try to make him jealous he will fight the other person
ok maybe just giving them the stank eye then he’ll pull up like
“hey im standing right here have some damn respect”
you guys definitely fight
A L O T
sometimes over petty shit but sometimes it gets serious
always threatning to break up but never doing it 
you both know you’re bluffing but it still hurts everytime
but your relationship is strong
i feel like yeonjun wouldnt get into a relationship if he knew he wouldnt have a strong connection with the person
he values communication
tell him how you feel
he’ll always listen
if he’s feeling down you better buy him his favorite foods and run your hands through his hair ok!
speaking of food
best food runs
like will just randomly be like 
“hey wanna go to this one place with me?”
and it’s like 2am 
but he insists the food is worth it
best dates too
either a restaurant date
(doesnt have to be expensive, just gotta have good food)
or he cooks for the both of you
he cooks surprisingly good????
you’re like there’s no way you made this
he’s like damn you hate me that much
but no like actually can cook but he’s clumsy you know
you gotta be monitering him
which he doesnt mind, he likes having your presence in the kitchen with him
PLEASE i feel like he doesn’t like being alone when he’s doing everyday tasks idk
like if he’s brushing his teeth or if you’re brushing your teeth
he’s right there back hugging you ugh
the type to walk on the side of the sidewalk where cars are closer to <3
if you’re younger than him he kinda has a superiority complex
not in a condescending way
he just tends to baby you more
if you’re older he still tries to act older in some ways
“yeonjun im going to the grocery store!”
“actually i made that exact same grocery list and went 3 days ago”
“the only thing on the list was rice?”
but he likes being babied
coo at him and he’ll get shy and tell you to stop
meeting the other members isn’t too bad
“this is my significant other! arent they just so etheral?”
everyone nods because if they dont yeonjun will probably give them some choice words later
you gotta compliment him a lot
he thrives off compliments honestly
you: “you looked good in that one scene”
him: “yeah but i looked good in all the scenes though right?”
you CANNOT C A N N O T compliment anyone else
you: “soobi-”
him: glaring at you “what about him?”
just to mess with him youre like “soobin killed this scene too”
pouts and whines
“nooooo what do you mean he killed this scene?? i’m the scene too pay attention to me!”
studio sessions with him are a vibe
he likes rnb so yall would just be chilling on days where he doesnt have schedules. 
plays his rnb playlist and yall just vibe out 
youre both laying down on the studio couch with his head in your neck and he’s dozing off *broken heart emoji”
wait ok i know i’ve said this before but
he’s the type to tease you during arguments
“you wanna kiss me so bad”
and when you do he’s all smug about it
“my baby just can’t stay mad at me for long huh”
your friends think he’s hot
they probably think he’s way too good looking to be dating you
so you doubt yourself
but he’s like nah our looks are on par that’s why we’re perfect together fuck them
always wants you to watch him dance
during practice or not, he wants you there
after hours at the practice room is just him playing some random song and freestyling
but you love it because he looks so happy and free
probably does some cheesy shit like ask you to dance with him
or if you’re sitting down on your phone he’ll come up to you dancing just to bother you then just laugh
he’s the best boyfriend
idk
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meltwonu · 4 years
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| 🍒 CH-CH-CHERRY BOMB! 🍒 |     [CHAPTER 16]
pairing; dom!seungcheol x camgirl!reader
this chapter’s notes; camshow, dom!seungcheol, oral(fem receiving), a little overstimulation, some hair pulling, dirty talk, possessive!seungcheol makes an appearance, sex toys, seungcheol riskin’ it all in this one 😏😳 yall!!! only 4 more chapters after this 🥺 it’s so crazy, I don’t even remember when I started this series but omg, my longest one yet! 💕 thank you so much for the support on cherry bomb, as always!! I love yall 💕💕 also my god has it been a week 😭 gonna do an inbox roundup tomorrow!💕 But for now, enjoy ch16 and have a good, safe weekend!! 💕🍒 
chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - x - x - x - x
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“Let me get this straight… She asked you if you considered her your girlfriend and you said what?”
Seungcheol grimaces for the third time, brows furrowed when Jeongguk blinks at him incredulously. “I’m sorry, I just---I need to hear it from your lips again, hyung.”
“Ugh, I said ‘sure’, okay!? I got nervous! That was a big fuckin’ question!” Seungcheol tugs at his own hair, groaning as he slams his head down onto the concession stand. “Don’t even get me started on the look she gave me after. I had to sleep next to her, you don’t know how horrible that was after my fuck up.”
Jeongguk pats Seungcheol’s hair; shaking his head as he gently tries to comfort his hyung.
“What did she say afterwards?”
“She just said ‘oh, okay’ and then she changed topics.” Seungcheol lifts his head from the countertop, hair mussed as he stares back at Jeongguk who shoots him a pitiful look.
“And that was it? The two of you went to bed?” Seungcheol nods, “We ate a little and she started talking about work so I thought everything was okay? But the more I think about it the more I’m thinking ‘oh, okay’ isn’t really okay? Listen, I haven’t been in a relationship in a while and the last thing I ever expected out of meeting her was for her to be my girlfriend!”
Jeongguk laughs in return, “I can tell. You’re fuckin’ rusty as hell, hyung.”
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“He said what?”
You groan as you pick up another plate. “He said ‘sure’ and then it got awkward. We ate dinner and then went to bed and this morning when he dropped me off, I felt like---weird? I was all shy all of a sudden, maybe even awkward.” Jun helps you clear off the table, taking a couple plates of his own before turning to face you.
“Like, ‘butterflies in my stomach’ kinda shy? Or, like, ‘that wasn’t really the answer I was looking for’ kinda awkward shy?”
Grimacing, you start to wipe down the table as Jun watches. “I’m not even sure. I mean… He didn’t say no, right? But I guess I was just expecting a little more than just ‘sure’. Nothing like, grandiose but… a little more than ‘sure’? It’s like he was replying to me asking if he wanted a piece of chocolate.”
Jun laughs, fingertips on his chin as he thinks of an appropriate response. “He might just be… awkward. I mean, what was the preface of this question? What conversation were you two having?”
Your lips press into a firm line, cheeks hot as Jun stares you down. “Okay… maybe you’re right. I didn’t really… work up to that question. I kinda just… asked it. I mean, you guys were asking about it in the comments too so I just thought--”
“Ah! There’s the problem though. I don’t think hyung was even in the chat at that point. So, just because all of us were talking about it doesn’t mean he knew, y’know? He might’ve just been caught off guard.”
“Ugh... fuck, you’re probably right.”
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You and Seungcheol don’t talk about it.
Even though you can feel the tenseness between the two of you during dinner and even when he drops you off and picks you up from work Friday afternoon. It’s all clipped conversations and shy, awkward smiles like the two of you had met for the first time, all over again.
It eventually comes to a head when you’re only an hour away from needing to start your cam show, Friday night, and you realize that you weren’t sure if Seungcheol was going to be part of it or not. “Hey, ‘Cheol?” You ask, voice small as you stare at the back of his head. The male turns from his place on the sofa, eyes wide as saucers at your shy voice.
“Y-yeah?”
“Are you, um, going to cam with me tonight or…? I mean, I can do it alone, I just--I wasn’t sure if you wanted to, tonight.” Seungcheol bites the inside of his cheek; he really wanted to talk about it and he didn’t understand why this, out of all the things, was so difficult for him to talk about.
“I--I don’t know. I just, I’m sorry, can I just... apologize first?” He groans as he gets up from the sofa and rounds it until he steps in front of where you sit atop the bed sheets. “It’s been so awkward and I know it’s because of me, so you don’t need to say anything. I just--I should’ve said more than ‘sure’, I was just nervous!” His cheeks burn red; wide eyes avoiding your own as you stare up at him. “I really want you to be my girlfriend, if I didn’t already make that clear. I was just thinking about how I never really expected you to like me that much, much less start a relationship with me, so the first thing that came out of my mouth was just… that. It was dumb, I should’ve said something else, but I think my brain was just mush by then.”
Your own cheeks feel hot at his confession; trying to hide the beaming smile that threatens to paint your features. “No--no, I should apologize a little too. I asked you that out of nowhere and made you panic. I should’ve worked it up better than that too.”
“I guess we’re both a little dumb, huh?” He laughs under his breath as he scratches the back of his head in embarrassment. “We can talk about everything else under the sun but that was just… harder to talk about in the moment.”
“Yeah, but we’re okay now, right? We’re an official c-couple?” You bite your lip, looking up at Seungcheol who seems to be staring off into the distance. A grin finds itself painted on his lips as he meets your shy eyes.
“That’s right, babygirl.”
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Seungcheol decides to let you do your cam show alone tonight; watching from the sofa as you get settled on the bed before nodding at him and starting your stream.
“Hey, everyone! Happy Friday!”
The comments and donations flood in as soon as you start and you already hit your donation minimum before you even open your mouth to speak again. It catches you off guard momentarily as your eyes go wide and your lips part in a shocked expression.
“Whoa, that was so fast! We already hit the donation minimum!”
sleepy_wonu has donated $75
sleepy_wonu: your channel has grown so much in the past few weeks im not surprised lol
universe_WZ: yea seriously, i remember when it took us like 30 mins before we hit minimum
artist8hao has donated $75
artist8hao: now theres ppl we’ve never even seen before in the comments lol
angelhan has donated $50
tangerine_kwan has donated $50
“Oh I know! Remember that one cam show where it took me, like, almost an hour to reach minimum? If it weren’t for ‘dom.cheol’ then, I don’t think that one would’ve taken off at all!” You giggle at the memory, eyes momentarily flitting to Seungcheol who smiles back at you.
kitty_junjun: speaking of? No loverboy tonight?
therealchan99: oh yeah i didnt even notice he was gone 😌
chwenon: lmfao
“Ah, he said he wanted to take a break tonight so it’s just me! Hope that’s okay with you guys?” You pout at the camera, fingertips roaming your lingerie clad body as you read off a few more comments. “I’m so used to his hands all over my skin though… He gets me to cum so easily, y’know?”
You pick up a dildo sitting next to you on the bed; bringing the silicone toy to your lips as you moan. “This is the biggest toy I have and it’s not anywhere near the size of his cock...” Wrapping your lips around the tip, you start sucking on the toy, imagining it was Seungcheol’s cock instead when it fills your mouth.
Your eyes flutter shut when you start grinding against the bedsheets underneath you and Seungcheol feels his throat going dry at the way you take more and more of the toy into your mouth until you’re gagging on it. Tears spring to your eyes when you feel your throat constricting around the silicone and you repeat this action a few more times before you’re pulling the toy from your mouth and sputtering to catch your breath.
gentleman_josh95: god youre so fucking pretty choking on cock
alphagyu97 has donated $50
alphagyu97: fuck i know
Setting the toy down, you immediately work to get your lingerie off; tossing it to the side before spreading your legs for the camera. “Mmh, I’m already so wet thinking about this toy filling me up…” You tease yourself with the toy, dragging the tip through your folds and collecting the wetness on it as you mewl.
xcaliburDK: but is it gonna be enough for you?
hoshi_tiger_xx: probably not, we all know the toys arent as good as the real thing lolol
You let out a whimper as you circle your clit with the tip of the toy. “I know… But I really want something inside my pussy…”
Seungcheol feels his cock throbbing in his sweats at the way your words only sound sweeter to his ears now that the two of you had cleared the air. He bites his lip, palming himself through the material as he watches you from his place on the sofa.
alphagyu97: is ur tight lil cunt ready to take it?
therealchan99: why dont u use your pretty fingers to get yourself ready hmm?
You nod shakily, setting the toy down again before bringing your middle and index fingers to your lips to wet them properly before snaking them down your body. “Ah, my fingers aren’t as big either…” Mumbling, you pinch and tease your clit, moaning out loudly before dragging them down and sinking them into your soaked entrance.
“Fuh--fuck, mmh!” Regretfully, your fingers aren’t as thick or long as Seungcheol’s but you curl and scissor the digits inside of you to prep yourself for the toy.
The sound of your moans and cries mix in with the pinging on your laptop from donations and comments and for once, Seungcheol realizes how weird it is to be on the other side and not with you. Admittedly, he’d gotten quite used to being on cam with you that it seemed awkward to just be doing nothing on the other side of the room.
“Oh, ngh, I--I want the toy n-now…” Mewling, you pull your soaking fingers from inside of your pussy; bringing them to your lips to clean them off of your wetness before grabbing the toy again. You run the silicone through your folds as you get it covered in your slick before positioning it at your entrance and slowly sinking it in.
It was definitely smaller than Seungcheol and didn’t have the same girth, but you still whine and whimper when it fills you up to the base of the toy. “Ngh, feels g-good…”
universe_WZ: i just kno that toy is noy as satisfying as the real thing huh princess?
xcaliburDK: right? Her pretty lil pussy is probably so used to being stretched by a big cock 
You thrust the toy into your pussy, soft cries spilling from your lips as you try to imagine it’s Seungcheol instead. In all honesty, you would’ve wanted him to film with you but you respected his decision to stay on the sidelines for tonight.
“Ah, it--it’s not the s-same… I--I need h-help…” You whine; shaky fingertips still working the dildo in and out of your soaking pussy. 
“P-please, ah… the toy’s not, mmh, enough to make m-me feel good...”
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In the time between you picking up the toy and you actually sliding into your wet cunt, Seungcheol internally argues with himself on what to do.
And it’s not until you start begging to the air for more that he mentally says ‘screw it’ and gets up from the sofa.
Your eyes are clamped shut as you try to chase the pleasure and soon you feel the bed dip; confused eyes peering back at Seungcheol who’s entire body, including his head, is in the camera’s shot. “W-wait, you---”
“Me, what? You asked for me, right?” He turns his head, eyes staring directly into the camera as he smirks.
“Hi. I’m her boyfriend. But I think the rest of you know that already, right?”
The comments go wild with Seungcheol’s sudden face reveal, even though you and him are already lost in each other as he grips the base of the dildo and starts pumping it inside of you, angling it as best as he can to graze against your g-spot.
xcaliburDK: i think i need to quit my job tomorrow
chwenon: ??? didnt u just start
angelhan: damn i knew this dude was gonna be hot as hell
kitty_junjun: whoa nice to see ur face
kitty_junjun: i take it u lovebirds made up
xcaliburDK: yea i did but i think ive embarrassed myself enough for one lifetime
xcaliburDK has donated $150
xcaliburDK: for my shame
Your entire body is aflame with Seungcheo’s confidence and you feel the pleasure building up even quicker now that he was here with you. “Ah, f-fuck…” Whining, you bite your lip to prevent yourself from calling out his name; something you were used to by now.
“What’s wrong, baby? Call my name. Let them know who makes you feel this fuckin’ good. Let them know who’s cock you always crave and who’s cock fills you up better than this toy ever fuckin’ could.”
“Fuck, S--Seungcheol!”
Your orgasm hits you out of left field; thighs clamping shut around his arm as he continues to fuck you with the dildo as you ride out your pleasure. He turns to face the camera yet again, winking at it cockily before he turns back to you. “That’s right, baby. Now I’m gonna eat your ‘lil cunt out and make you cum on my tongue while you let the entire world know who gets you this fuckin’ wet.”
He doesn’t give you a second to come down from your high before he’s nudging your thighs apart and sliding the dildo from inside of you. A shaky breath falls from your lips as he readjusts you on the bed; this time giving the camera a side view as you turn your head to face the camera.
The comments and donations continue to flood in, except now it seems like they’re going twice as fast.
xcaliburDK: kjdkjghsdkhg fuck
sleepy_wonu: well can i say at least hes not an old weirdo lol
sleepy_wonu: ❤️
chwenon: im like, pretty sure ive seen this dude come to the convenience store i work at
chwenon: bruh i met a celebrity and i didnt even know it
xcaliburDK: dont even get me started
Seungcheol pries your shaky legs apart before he eases himself down between them. “I want you to be as loud as fuckin’ possible. Understood?” He smiles at you warmly, but his words have a certain edge to them that has you nodding profusely.
“O--okay…”
He wastes no time; skilled tongue flicking at your swollen clit as you jolt and immediately tangle your hands into his hair. “Oh, god, Seungcheol I’m--I’m, ah, sensitive…” He smirks against your skin, noting the way you already start to grind against his tongue despite your words.
Resting your thighs against his shoulders, it allows him to eat you out easier as he flattens his tongue and drags it from your soaking entrance to your clit; alternating the pressure as you whine and whimper above him.
When he notices you trying to keep your noises in, he pulls away slightly, flicking your clit with the tip of his tongue before speaking.
“I thought I told you I wanted to hear you, baby? Don’t get shy on me now.” He smirks, watching as the goosebumps rise on your skin. “In fact, why don’t you tell your lovely viewers how good I make you feel, hmm? Or tell them about the time you made me finger you in the restroom at work ‘cause your ‘lil cunt couldn’t wait.”
xcaliburDK: THE RESTROOM? At woRK?
artist8hao: ah one of the originals huh
gentleman_josh95 has donated $75
gentleman_josh95: for backstory
tangerine_kwan has donated $75
tangerine_kwan: seconded!
You bite your lip when you catch the comments, shy eyes flitting from the screen to Seungcheol who resumes eating you out. Your thighs tremble and threaten to snap shut around his head; body already on the edge of another orgasm. 
“I--S--Seungcheol was at, ah, w-work… and I--I couldn’t wait so--so I made him finger m-me in his work’s restroom…” You whimper, hangs tugging on Seungcheo’s hair harshly when his tongue dips into your entrance. “Fuck, I--I couldn’t stop thinking about, ngh, his--his fingers afterwards e-either… They fit my p-pussy so well…”
A garbled moan floats through the air when Seungcheol’s lips envelope your clit, sucking it into his mouth as your cry out his name.
Your back bows off of the bed, fingertips locked tight into his hair. “Fuck, Seungcheol, please… please…” You grind against him, toes curling against his back when your sensitive body gives into the pleasure and your orgasm washes over you a second time.
Cries of his name are all you can manage when your body goes rigid; head fuzzy when he starts to dip his tongue into your pussy again. He smiles against you, calmly continuing to eat you out as your orgasm continues to wash over you.
kitty_junjun: is it just me or is it nicer to hear her actually calling someones name
artist8hao: honestly i was just thinking that too
artist8hao: its more organic idk  
alphagyu97: ~organic~ ok nerd lol
chwenon has donated $50
therealchan99 has donated $50
When the  overstimulation starts to bite, your soft cries of Seungcheol’s name turn into hurried, jumbled noises and only parts of his name as you squirm and tug on his hair.
“Ah, ‘Cheol it’s, ngh, too--too m-much…!” He drags his tongue against your clit a few more times, relishing in the way you still grind against him. “I c-can’t cum again…” You cry, teeth chattering when he gently laps at your folds and collects your wetness on his tongue.
Seungcheol repeats this a few more times; letting you tug and pull at his hair as he licks you clean.
“Ngh, Seungcheol…”
He finally pulls away, using a hand to pry your fingers from his hair as he smiles at your tired body. “Cute.” Mumbling, he eases your shaky legs from his shoulders before he sits up; lips covered in your wetness as he grins at the camera.
Seungcheol picks out a few comments as he chuckles under his breath; already wondering what work was going to be like on Monday when he had to meet Seokmin. 
universe_WZ: u look like a dude that could fuck someone up 
kitty_junjun: he probably would too
chwenon: come thru the convenience store bro, I'll hook u up 
xcaliburDK: should I quit? be honest
Your tired groans bring his attention back to you; eyes trained on the way your tired eyes threaten to snap shut. 
“Okay, I think I need to go take care of my girlfriend now. It was nice meeting you all, finally.” Seungcheol grins, taking care of your stream before thanking your viewers and ending the stream. 
He turns to you, a genuine and caring smile on his face when your hazy eyes look up at him. 
“Ready for a shower?”
“Ugh, carry me, boyfriend~”
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caroldantops · 3 years
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hi me again!!
YES THE SIDE EFFECTS!!! she'd trace them all round your tummy and would probably try to chase them and like coo at them etc...
i'd also like to imagine that ur skin gets more sensitive so it's ticklish and she kinda loves to see u giggle in reaction to her doing that.. like i just think she'd be so soft but also v protective.. like she'd be with u all the time. if she could she'd probably just keep u in her lap and do everything for u ((within reason of course))
just soft!dark!tentaclemommy!agatha! stuff!! i think.. anyways. my brain is frying at all these thoughts.
yesss!!! i luv the idea of her poking at them and u can feel them shift inside u....
i also like to think that theyre warm inside u and ur like a lil space heater and agatha is naturally cold and she snuggles up and rests her head on ur tummy and yea
soft dark tentacle mommy agatha UGH why arent u real </3
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bimbosupreme · 3 years
Text
mephistopheles love post
the equivalent of a mental breakdown tangent is all going under a read more
yes believe it or not that freaky ass literally not even human clown in fgo gets love, and love from who? me and like 3 other people
first off
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ok and with that out of the way,
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i’m not even familiar with their lore. Reason why i stopped caring about the lore behind faust and mephistopheles is that an interlude happens that shows that mephistopheles is just some homunculi made by some mage nobody named faust. and even then the interlude doesn’t talk about the lore behind the novel, its just you helping mephy kill faust
that being said though i would hope the developers expand on their origins more and potentially even release a “true” mephistopheles (a girl can dream)
So, they’re not even the real deal demon known as Mephistopheles in the first place, and i can hear u going “well that’s lame” and like, no, we just need to redirect our feelings from appreciating a demon to appreciating a homunculi who has a weird characterization in the fate universe
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Design tangent:
Fgo was actually my first gacha, and so when I came across this servant I kinda instantly fell in love with their design, I love the colors used in their final ascension and overall appearance. The hat that has horns but they're not quite horns, theyre these weird colorful pointy twisty things, the large garish butterfly ornament on their chest (which isnt ugly at all and somehow works so well with their everything on them) is cool, the tights are so cool to look at, i mean look -- a checkered pattern with golden lining on the shorts portion, the tits out look like yes we get it youre insane, the gloves??? purple and also cool, plus theyve got this gradient thing going on? and the fingers have this line going through them, thats so cool. actually the only other servant that comes close to this in terms of “out there” colorful designs is probably final ascension kama and qsh ( i love them both). Also, mephy has this scissor weapon?? thats so cool lol i dont see any other servant wielding giant scissors (for the love of god give mephy an animation update i need to see them use the scissors while doing flips) and they also have this bomb obsession going on? cant relate, but the bombs designs are so so cool i mean its a fucking centipede -- no idea if centipedes are a thing in the original faust but thats something Ill have to look up at some point. ALSO mephy is wearing heels oh my god anytime people wear heels is an automatic win. No clue whats going on with the hair but its kinda cute (dont question me on that) and it has curls and the hair colors are cool i mean its like a lavender thing with darker purple highlights? i love colorful things and i love people with wacky personalities so. Oh my god their tail how could i forget that its so cute and dumb i almost forgot it was there, like what is that even a whip? i dont.. but its got these little purple tips to them that are kinda cute/cool but more cool because tails are fucking up there alongside heels in terms of cool stuff on characters. and of course their fluffly cape -- again no idea what the designers were going for i mean look its a mess of a design i have no fucking idea what any of it means and i hope they explain it someday because that hair and the butterfly and the tail and the hat and the fluffy garb and a bomb obsession?? and this got the go ahead - yeah lets add that to the game like what
ALSO LETS TALK ABOUT THEIR EYES
appreciate these with me for a second
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god.
oh and the blue lipstick and face paint god thats a cool design ugh
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they can be normal too or at least as normal as possible i mean they even trimmed their eyebrow here lol but you can see the not so well hidden insanity/goofiness peaking through with the inside of the suit at the bottom being highlighter purple and a green shirt with gold accents underneath the black coat at the front <3, fuckin hate that hairstyle tho bro we gotta get that middle part hairstyle outta hereeeee--
TAKE A DETOUR AND LOOK AT THIS LINK THOUGH THIS IS THE MOST NORMAL AND BEST IVE SEEN THEM IN FANART. THE POTENTIAL IS THERE. WE CAN HAVE NICE THINGS AND THEY LOOK GREAT ITS POSSIBLE. I HAVE TEARS STREAMING DOWN MY FACE FROM THAT DRAWING.
anyways this is me going off all about why i like their design! but we haven’t even touched the nitty gritty of it all. their personality! what personality you may ask? havent they always been some weirdo laughing a lot and saying dumb shit all the time? well yes and no
Characterization:
True to their dumb little clown design mephy also acts like one.
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Some servants bond 1 lines are like “fuck off” and some actually talk to you, nah this bastard mephistopheles’ just laughing. and for the second bond line it seems to imply theyre fuckin with you more (showing up and dissapearing and saying ‘afterimage’) so thats nice that theyre actually making some effort to mess with you in a way? some servants take a long time to actually interact with you so this shows theyre not afraid of interacting with you and thats just at bond 2. and of course the third bond line implies they were probably trying to betray you, its stated in more than 1 place that mephistopheles (actually isnt this a caster class thing?) will betray you or attempt to do so. So the third bond line seems to imply that their attempts have been stopped by you and that’s what they say after some failed attempts. So after stopping this freak from doing some shit their next bond line is actually doing a confession! a jester being honest who couldve seen that one coming but theyre 100% not lying, they really arent a demon but a homunculi made by faust
speaking of faust we’re going to backtrack a little into their interlude that i brought up at the start of this post, its one of those dream interludes and it starts with mephy asking you to help him plant bombs for their eventual reuinion/showdown with faust -- in the meantime faust keeps sending golems in an attempt to kill both you and mephy
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When you track faust down, it’s shown that faust was your typical mage, inhumane and uncaring. It’s also pointed out that this faust killed innocents, but this typical mage behavior is boring to mephy, and they say that boring typical behavior is why they wanted to kill them
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 so i really cant blame mephistopheles for being the way they are, being raised by this type of guy, even if mephy was always messed up and wacky from the beginning its no reason for faust to attempt to kill him.
Mephistopheles also shows up in salem, cu alter’s interlude, and of course the knk crossover event, and some other things im most likely forgetting but those 3 are ones that i find notable
anytime they show up theyre actually helpful, in salem mephy points out that the nature of the being responsible for the salem epic of remnant is something alien rather than a typical foreign god, mephy also tells you that time is also being sped up and in their weird way they try to cheer you up by spouting some nonsense at the beginning (guda needed some kind of distraction from the grim events that had just transpired at that point in the story), i cant quite remember what mephy did in the knk event but they were a part of your group and were helpful the whole time, actually @/zeravmeta does an amazing analysis of their role in the knk event as well as some extra character analysis here
mephistopheles is kinda cryptic in a weird way though,
like overall i mean theyre a jester homunculi in appearance so yeah its to be expected but come on i love morally gray characters, despite their supposed betrayal hints scattered around here and there
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they have this one line that always gets to me
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and this line is said with a completely serious face too
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the rare serious mephistopheles face! its kinda grim to see that line, no laughs, no nothing, their voice is kinda serious and monotone too. of course this could be just to get you to lower your guard but its still kinda out there that they have this rarely used portrait and that line, so i like to take it as being said to you when youre by yourself and with sincerity
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and at least sei (with her wacky outfit and all lol) seems to get along with mephy and thinks theyre nice woohoo
so at the end of the day you have this guy that laughs a lot and gives mixed signals
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and they fuck with you
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and will most likely try to kill you more than once but hey thats just another tuesday at chaldea
Before I finish last thing I want to point out is this snippet from the fgo source material book which provides more information on servants, and this specific translated bit under mephistopheles
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at the core of it all this homunculi....can be your friend! you just need to not go into despair i guess
of course this entire post is an overanalysis into an underwritten character, quarantine + all online college classes have done this to me, i have a douman icon what did you expect
OH...BEFORE I REALLY SIGN OFF AND FINISH THE POST HEY CLOWN LOVERS CHECK OUT THESE FANARTS AND FANARTISTS...
THE FIRST ONE IS HASENDOW YES THE DOUMAN DESIGNER... <3
i cant believe they drew mephy
twice !
and for those of you on twitter check out @cuz_pb and @L0VEYAMA003
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pixcldust · 4 years
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2 A.M. TEXTS
ft. miya atsumu, kuroo tetsuro, semi eita
with | gn!reader
warnings | swear words
a/n | NOT ME ACTING LIKE MY EXAMS ALREADY OVER 😹😹😹 n e ways have some hcs mwah ily drink some water
+ | tumblr is refusing to let me add a read more break without messing up the order/pics so please accept it without the break first 😰 i'll try to edit it in tomorrow bc it's 1am right now lmfaoo 🤪🤪
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MIYA ATSUMU
• lowkey headcanon this guy to be kinda a night owl too
• like, unless he has a major game tomorrow, then he’ll probably be awake at 2am so feel free to shoot him a text
• but if you send him a “i cant sleep :(” then man’s gonna take it REAL far
• “my parents arent home rn so if you want to come over, i could help you… sleep ;))) ”
• STFUU 😩
• he might not even be h0rny, he’s just Like That
• that’s just his sense of humor 😭😭 yea it might be mine too shush
• you just wanted to chill and chat bc insomnia’s getting the best of you, so whY-
• but once you get past that, he’d actually be really pleasant to text with
• yall might even facetime just because
• there’s just SO MUCH to talk about???
• topics range from dumb pickup lines to Deep Talk
• ngl eventually you guys might make some secsi jokes,,,, its inevitable im sorry
• no im nOT a nsfw writer
• but it’s 2am ok the Early Morning High is bound to hit different
• “damn ok im on my way,,, get those cuffs ready babe😼😼”
• JDHDNDCJ????3!%;÷)÷*?
• FUCK, NEITHER OF YOU CAN TAKE IT SERIOUSLY
• ur neighbours: who tF is cackling like that at 3 in the morning????
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KUROO TETSURO
• i think it’s 50/50 with this boy
• like he’s either still awake and reading like a nerddd or he’s fast asleep
• but if you do shoot him a text message, send him something random
• like out of nowhere, just “did you know some snails have hairy shells?”
• he’s got a quick response time (although not as fast as atsumu) so just wait a minute for him to pick up his phone
• OH AND send him a pic of the hairy shells!!
• “thanks! i hate it!!”
• you know he’s gonna reply with an equally weird fact
• kuroo has a fair share of general knowledge too so just go wild
• will not question why you’re on the wikipedia page for snails bc lbr, he’s been there before 😔
• such a funny sweetheart about your random messages
• also he’s be awake with you throughout, even if he gets a little sleepy 🥺🥺🥺
• sir,,, hand in marriage please,,,,,,
• but definitely will throw in a “y/n, it’s almost 3:30 pls get some sleep before class tomorrow”
• hm……. no.
• WAIT YOU SHOULD ASK TO CALL
• his deep, kinda rough voice at 2am because he hasn’t used it in the past two hours ,,,,, mmmmmm,,,,
• lowkey he might fall asleep on call 🙊
• pls forgive him he’s just a very big babie
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SEMI EITA
• listen
• if you texted this man at 2am
• his immediate response would be “it’s too early y/n. go to sleep.”
• BOO 🍅 BORING ASS BIJ 🍅🍅
• jkjk i love him but yall gotta admit that he’d be all 🙄😐
• “ffs y/n, you have a class tomorrow at 8”
• “and??? your point?????”
• dw he’d just take a deep breath and be like omfg why am i in love with this idiot
• yes bby he loves you mwah
• when he gets past that tho,,,
• listening to music together on spotify 😳😳
• you guys would take turns choosing songs and it’d be so cutee
• yeah he’d be into,, idk alt rock or indie rock ?
• but he’s not an ASS, he’d be okay with indie pop and mainstream and whatever else is your fave genre
• in between, he’d be so down to hearing you talk about your hobbies or a show you’ve been watching
• and like,, he’ll tell you about how he’s writing a song or what funny thing happened in his class or during training
• UGH HE’S JUST SO FINE AND SO CUTE
• omg yall can video call and he’d share his screen
• both of you watching ghibli movies tgt at 3 in the morning : 🥰🥴
• it is just so peaceful being with this boy
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papers4me · 3 years
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Fruits Basket, Se3, ep11 (part 1)
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Breaking toxic bonds & accepting healthy ones isn’t a miracle. A bond that started with love could end up chained & toxic, another that started wrong could’ve become the joy of a life time. You can do it. Break the cycle of abuse & stand up for yourself, it is easy yet so difficult, you aren’t alone, tho, loved ones stand nearby cheering. Be kind on yourself, otherwise you’ll throw your life away. Life isn’t just happiness & joy, it’s also sadness & loneliness. Break free from the shackles that held you down. Embrace life & Live.
-Tohru’s “ I’m okay” mask is finally shattered! (the Importance of kyo��s rejection for her development):
This is the last part of tohru’s character development! The last few eps were abt her role in Akito’s redemption & their similarities. she staood up for herself & choose a path away from her mom while keeping her mom’s memory in a healthy manner. No more planning my life according to mom’s wishes, no more talking to mom ‘s picture 24/7. Now, I’ll plan my life & move forward even if it is with the guy mom said she cant forgive. even If it is without him, I’ll move forward. I love him so much, yet I won’t force our bond & let go. So easy yet so difficult!. tohru doesnt know anything abt kyo after her fall. All she remembers is his heart-broken face as he wept beside her. Those tears on his face, she caused them. He cried cuz it is too painful to see her hurt. She was a burden to him! tohru restored to her old coping mechanism of pretending “ i’m Okay” & smiling. She did so numerous times before. Always worked. No one noticed. Except him. Se02, ep7. he urged her to show her true fears. Now, she’s faced with a pain so big she can’t pretend no more. the pain of loosing him. She cried in front of yuki! The smile & chatting abt chores couldn’t conceal the running tears! Yuki’s first time seeing her like that. Se01, ep14, yuki wondered how could tohru smile after her mom’s death. She can’t pretend no more! She’ll have to wear her feelings on her sleeve! cuz it IS ok to do so! She tells kyo to give her a moment to compose herself. She couldn’t lie & pretend like she did with yuki. Here she either run away or just try to compose myself! I LOVE THAT! This way, whenever kyo/tohru fight or have any misunderstanding in the future as a couple, you’ll know tohru won’t just bear it & pretend, “ i;m okay” No! she’ll talk to kyo & express herself! I LOVE THIS SO MUCH! It gives her so much strength as a human & I’m happy all the obstacles & set backs in kyo/tohru’s romantic journey has led them to be better ppl little by little to build healthier & more realistic love! 
-The mechanics of writing a compelling slow-burn romance:
1. Igniting the romantic feelings slowly: Slow burns don’t work with love at 1st sight. It must first sparkle naturally, slowly & subtly. Both kyo & tohru repeatedly stated they don’t know exactly when they first fell in love. The author’s decision to create an environment where the two live together is a genius way to start & nurture their romance quietly & subtly. Kyo was tricked to stay in shigure’s house while tohru had to stay cuz she had no home, Natural reasons that force the two to spend days together & get to know each other gradually.
2. Dynamics of their personalities: For slow burns to work, the two characters need to be similar yet opposites! Kyo & tohru are both kind, endearing, innocent, good at chores, independent & hardworking. They both have history with their mothers that is filled with love yet traumas. However, tohru is calm yet prefer maneuvering around subjects, can’t stand up for herself, reads ppl easily, tends to trust ppl easily & disregard herself. Kyo is fierce, strong, tends to distrust ppl, despite ppl loving his spontaneous character, he has hard time figuring out if they’re mocking him or teasing him, very straightforward with his words & actions. The similarities helps them understand each other, however, the differences creates chances to clash & come even closer thro various situation. Ex, se01, ep2, kyo apologizing for hitting her head with the table which created the situation where she needed to confess she always loved the cat zodiac! It is HER gush of emotions that struck kyo. ppl really want my friendship? the cat is loved? Thro those difference they learned to better themselves so they won’t hurt the other, kyo toning down his anger for her, tohru desiring to know him even more as he becomes even more awkward.
3. Creating natural, realistic  & convincing obstacles that prevents them from being together:  This is the most important part! Slow-burn is two characters in love & cant be together despite everyone wanting them to be! if the reason that stops them from uniting is trivial, stupid, one-sided, can easily be solved, then the slow-burn would be a fillery & no one would cheer for it! Takaya-san is a genius!
Kyo can’t be with tohru cuz he thinks (a) he killed her mom! we saw thr flashback, he could’ve saved her & couldn’t save her. It was a split of a second difference & he hates himsef for NOT trying! that split of a second also prevented from thinking of better ways to save her than holding her! it happened to fast, he couldn't think of a better alternative cuz this was his 2nd time loosing someone (b) his mom’s sucide being pinned as his fault created this immense guilt & defeated feeling that “ no matter what, I just cause death & misery! There’s (c) too!, he knew tohru! thinks she deserves the world & cuz he didnt save her mom, he watched tohru talk to a freaking picture for two years! heck! he is the only one who can see thro tohru’s “ i;m okay” mask, so in se01, ep 14 in the grave yard! kyo wasnt the only one who is sad! tohru was too! & kyo could tell! (d) her mom’s death is the reason tohru is accepting shigure’s offer to stay with them rent-free in exchange of doing housework! (e)? he saw her confess crying her heart out abt missing her mom so much that she imitated her dad! so tragicly sad! (f) he saw her die in his nightmare!! how can he accept her love,now? Perfectly orchestrated obstacles! 
Tohru, unfortunately, in the anime it wasn't that clear due to shortening her backstories & trauma in se03, ep6. But she too couldn’t see herself confessing love to kyo. Tohru is has low self-esteem, always thinks she’s a burden to others, an orphan who just wants her mom, so scared, lonely & sad! we the audience believed the mask! we saw her work her motherly charm yuki, isusuz, kisa & believe her issues are not that deep.  tohru wont cry for herself but shed rivers for others! grief is so ugly it broke her! I cant let go of mom, must keep her always in my heart, such a hard emotions to write & I believe 100% the director couldn’t understand her grief & decided to split ep6 between her, kyo, isuzu & shigure. But Tohru struggling to confess to kyo is no laughing matter. ppl who are grieving find it the hardest to live after the loved ones die. they wont mostly commit suicide, they are alive, but they arent living. they just go thro the motions & live for the sake of those around them but not themselves. Tohru deciding to confess to kyo is her deciding to live for herself.
4. Writing a perfect psychologically & emotionally packed climax: I dont need to explain how perfect kyo’s rejection of tohru in se03 ep9 was. How much we felt for him yet were mad at him. He we were “ ugh! kyo no!!!! I mean I get why you do that , but you idiot no! come back! poor kyo! He was just so sad & broken! OMG he’ll kill himself after finding tohru’s injured body!! he totally would! his nightmare came true! But Tohru reached him! she wanted him to be okay! he wont kill himself but still feels hella guilty! but so utterly in love with her that his instinct upon seeing her come to life after near death is kiss her! Perfect display of psychology & emotions! filled with right, wrong, sad, happy, guilty, innocent! basically so human~ As the audience you MUST have this mixture of feelings of wanting to hug him so bad cuz this boy has been killing himself for years now yet want him to stop & just see that he was a good boy afterall. Tohru is THE best girl & if the audience are cheering for kyo to be with her, kyo really deserves her! The only problem is for kyo to see that now.
5. The Perfect wrap up of all romance: If you make your audience suffer the slow-burn this long, you gotta reward them good! & Takaya-san delivered! Just like how the entire romantic story is realistic, the reunion must be as realistic too! Tohru is hurt by kyo;s words. Facts remain his words were hurtful to her. I love that was addressed! tohru gets to tell her side, too! If you love someone, you are bound to be hurt by them as much as be happy with them. Simply cuz they matter so much to you! you arent one person, but two ppl coming together. Kyo must work hard for this confession. Must run & chase her. Must earn her proper! He gets on his knees, I cant express how important that is! he is way taller than her, Imagine apologizing while she looks way up & he looks down? He gets on his knees & apologize like a man, for every mistake, all while not loathing himself. He aint going back to that deep abyss again. He did wrong by her & he is owning up to his mistakes. Give me one chance. I’m not gonna force you with persistence or guilt you into taking me. Give me ONE chance cuz i deserve it & no more. The choice is yours. She asks to confirm, he shows her, they kiss, they hug, they are rewarded with a blessing from the heavens! One of the most simple yet emotionally fulfilling confessions in anime!
- Hugs over kisses: (And her kiss hugs her & the curse was lifted):
Prince charming kisses the princess & she wakes up~ they live ever after~ except furuba is all abt “ eternal ever after is not true, real life is where the real love is”
Kyo kissed tohru once, she didnt wake up, she didnt even think he loved her back. didnt even remember the kiss.
Kyo hugged tohru once. se01, e024, He initiated it, tohru was all in tears, surprised, happy & so utterly in love. he called her name for the first time ever, for a brief moment, they both connected, they both comforted each other. The rain stopped, he became a man not a monster, she got him back. She got her kyo that she fought for with none other than kyo himself.
kyo hugged her again, se03, ep6. They both initiated it. He made the first move, pulling her just a little closer, she made the second move & hugged him hard, he transformed, it was a moment were they both connected, both so sad & broken, both feeling needy for the other, both desperate for the other, both just living the moment. the result is them coming closer, her wanting him more, him realizing her love, there is no escape. Admit it. she loves you. You can tell.
Kyo hugs her again today. He asks permission. No spur of the moment feeling. But a long lasting permission to be together. To hug. He wants to hear her acceptance of his cursed body. “ is ok to hug you? this body will cause you pain as it wont be able to fulfill your wishes of constant hugs & intimacy”. She responds, permission granted, for love, for hugs, for a life long acceptance of you as a whole. weakness & strength, sadness & happiness. I accept you all in better & worse! we’re invincible. Why? cuz we understand love isnt magic. It is a path for us to walk together~~~ reward curse break!
Every time kyoru are closer it is a hug. The one thing the zodiacs cant do. A hug. They can kiss. But cant hug. comes this Zodiac Ruler girl so lonely, away from ppl, so sad, meets a cat boy who comes to the house she’s living in, a house away from ppl, the boy is drawn to the girl, However, when the boy needed to leave, the girl was able to let go despite loving him, the boy comes again, this time wanting to stay, the girl accepts the boy. They both accept the realistic reality of life. Embrace the obstacles & the achievements, celebrates the weakness above the strength. Both so imperfect. Both so endearingly dumb! that’s why the girl’s hug broke the boy’s curse. The girl’s acceptance of the cat broke all curses.
Side Note:
Kyo’s confession is so kyo! so straightforward, so direct, & so physical. He’s on his knees, holding her hands, looking at her eyes. “ i want to be WITH you. If I’m gona live, I want to to do it with you & no one else! cuz I love you” that’s it. That’s all.  So sincere & so romantic!
it is crazy how different tohru & kyo are now after the confession! she stood confidently & happily & said “dont you know, I love you!” all while teasing him, her giggle is so girlish & cute! my girl is a happy woman in love! long buried the angelic mother image of se02! YES! also, kyo’s happy face is love! Dude! when was the last time he smiled so freely? Did he ever do that? He smiled in se01, ep4 with kazmua, but not like this! T_T. my son is healing~
Kyo’s “ i wont ever feel afraid if you’re with me” is a huge growth from his “ I want to protect her” mindset. Now he realizes it is two-sided mutual desire. She gives him strength as much as he does! <3
I dont like open eye while kissing, but here it is so perfect for tohru in this moment! cuz she spent days thinking kyo rejected her & even ran away as soon as she saw him, now he’s not only confessing, apologizing, admitting she is his life, but also kissing her signaling they’re romantic couple. kissing on lips is so personal, what more evidence she needs? still, her thoughts? “ it’s like a dream?” aww~~~ tohru~~~ my precious girl! she just cant believe all her suffering is over, now? She was just practicing “ i’m okay” smile & now she’s an official girlfriend to the man of her dreams? He just bent da kneeee~ go for it queen!
yuki’s face when tohru cried is exactly what I meant of “ allowing yuki to have strong facial expressions”! XD these types of faces humanize yuki so much into the teenage boy he is! Unfortunately the anime team only sees him as the pretty prince in most times. That’s why fave yuki is when he’s with kakeru. He becomes so un-princly as he should be.
Speaking of yuki, I see you anime team~ postponing his moment into next ep so him & machi wont be overshadowed by the long awaited kyoru!! While this defies the perfection of all cursed zodiacs breaking on the same ep making akito’s breakdown less perfect & poetic, I take it as the anime team admitting they underdeveloped yuchi & decided let’s give them more screen time & not putting them in close distance from any couple. A week later ep is enough with lots of time. I dont mind at all, I’m just saying more time after/while confession is not what i was hoping for~~ sigh~ At least I hope yuki would say sth along the lines” all this time I was looking at you, i realized i love you” to imply he was thinking of her as a lover not his kindness for someone he helped. I just dont want their love to be sudden simply cuz yuki needs happy ending. oh well~ I’m sure whatever it will be, the anime will give it utmost attention.
That sad moment when kagura wasnt allowed a moving image. lol. girl was given a still image that didnt even move with the breeze! T_T
Not gonna lie... the scene with kazuma & kyo was underwhelming. Why the wide shot? I mean you dont need budget for that. Just give me a closeup from the waist up with kyo head buried in kazuma’s chest. Dont need to waste budget on kazuma’s face, either.... do the old trick of hair covering eyes & show me glittery tears~  why the awkward shot of kazma towering in his own house! how tall is this man & why cant he he fix his roof?...lol
Also, shigure, you got scars man... who can hurt shigure? akito? gotta be her. I dont think hatori scratches...lol.. Aya? nah~ too busy with Mine! yup, akito... another steamy night? could be, she’s changed as he wish now. But scratching a face is weird while..um..kissing? a quarrel? but why? I bet she wants him now & we know he wants her....
More on part 2! especially abt the curse’s lore~
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muwur · 4 years
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long distance headcanons
✧ hc’s ✧ for daichi, suga, hinata & tsukki
❧ gn reader
✎ 1.5k words
a/n: hello yall this is my first post! nobody asked, but i just started this haikyuu reader insert blog, feel free to check my page n see wazzap. also requests are open pls come fhorfjepfiwf;
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daichi
✧ after high school, he stayed in miyagi while you went to tokyo, about 5 hours away, for college
✧ texting or calling whenever u can!
✧ you be like “heyyy”
✧ then he clap back with a “go focus on your lecture”
✧ “im not in lectureee”
✧ “you gave me your schedule so i know you’re in the middle of class”
✧ “...”
✧ makes sure you’re awake on time for your classes and calls you if he thinks you’re oversleeping (and hes usually right, this man just KNOWS)
✧ “morning y/n, i think you need to get to class soon”
✧ “mmrghhhghhh” *checks time* “holy sHI-- i forgot to set my alarm. IMMA BE LATE. THANKS DAICHI I LOVE YOU ILL TALK TO YOU LATER BYE”
✧ definitely skips out on some nights out with his friends to video chat you. you catch up, talk about future plans, reminisce, complain about not being able to hug one another, etc. occasionally one of you falls asleep on call, particularly after a long day or week. if he sleeps, you make sure you screenshot his sleeping face and start a picture collection  
✧ you hit him up when you get drunk lMAO
✧ “daiichiii, i miss youuu, i needdd youuuu AND i needa peeee---” “hey daichi, this is y/n’s friend. y/n’s pretty out of it now but they’ll be okay! we’re heading back to our place right now” “im gonna pEE IN THIS CAR”
✧ daichi coordinates with your friends to make sure you arrive home safely, use the bathroom, and get tucked into bed. he thanks the universe you have good friends. if it weren’t for them he’d probs have a heart attacc. sends you cute, reassuring voice messages for you to wake up to the next morning with hangover tips he learned from suga
✧ always checks in with you throughout the day, every day. able to pick up on the slightest hints if you’re feeling unwell and calls you immediately to try to make you feel better
✧ makes plans to visit you! you get really excited to introduce him to your college friends (who, after meeting him, tell you not only is he a hottie but is such a kind guy, fosho a keeper. they also ask if he has any cute friends)
✧ either holding your hand or has an arm around you most of the time.
✧ you spend all day together outside and wandering the city, then spend the night back at your place (sorry roommate, but we’re gonna have to kick you out for a lil bit--)    
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sugawara
✧ you finally secured a job! unfortunately, the company required you to work for a year at their main facility, which was a 4 hour drive away from miyagi
✧ if suga wasn’t needed in miyagi for his teaching job, he would’ve tried to come with you
✧ after unloading your things in your new apartment and before parting ways, suga was like
✧ “everything’s unloaded everything from the car?”
✧ “yes maam”
✧ “do you have enough snacks?”
✧ “we just went to the grocery hun”
✧ “did you bring enough underwear?”
✧ “gDI yEs I dID”
✧ “:c promise to call me often”
✧ “<3333 of course”</p>
✧ good morning texts before y’all leave for work! you send each other cute pictures when you’re getting ready for the day (suga with bedhead, brushing his teeth? suga with his tie half done?? sign me up)
✧ always texts you when something reminds him of you, usually sends a picture along with it
✧ “the store was having a special on oranges today! this one reminds me of you”
✧ “why”
✧ “it just looks so cute~”
✧ will immediately call you if you send him any sort of message that worries him
-“hello? y/n what’s wrong, why is there blood?? speak to me, you haven’t replied in 5 minutes”
✧ “ohhh my bad, i’m just cleaning up don’t worry! i didn’t explain, but the picture i sent you isn’t blood, it’s ketchup i spilled on myself lolol”
✧ poor man nearly fainted from worry
✧ would pay you a surprise visit, making sure to plan it carefully so he knew you weren’t busy with work or plans. brings you gifts of your favorite snacks and a scarf that matches one of his own for the upcoming winter
✧ plans out that weekend for y’all, mans did his research beforehand. together, you toured the city and the surrounding nature, took lots of selfies (and many candids of you), and taste tested lots of foods before returning to your apartment and collapsing into your bed with exhaustion
✧ but y’all not too tired for cuddling n a lil something else >.>
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hinata
✧ sure, being a couple hours away was hard for some... but y’all in different countries right now
✧ calls you immediately when there’s any inconvenience that occurs in his life, no matter how minor, thinking you’ll know how to fix it (or at least give him the reassurance he needs)
✧ “hey y/n...”
✧ “what’s wrong? you sound worried”
✧ “i broke my bike, what do i do”
✧ “you what? are you alright?? how? where are you? it’s midnight there, honey”
✧ “i was biking back to my apartment after staying late to practice! i didn’t wanna hit this turtle, so i swerved into a pole and now my bike’s wrecked :**”
✧ “ahh, are you okay?? you’re not hurt are you :(”
✧ “no, im okay... but im tired and i have two miles to go ;(((”
✧ “;( im sorry babe but you gotta walk home. we’ll get you a new bike. ill stay on the phone with you until you get back. tell me about your day <3″</p>
✧ talks about you all the time to his friends! introduces you through video chat to them! “look how pretty and cute y/n is!”
✧ together you work out your time differences and busy schedules so you can chat whenever possible
✧ he lets you know whenever he bought something for you, but never shows it to you because he’s excited to see your reaction in person when you reunite
✧ always asks you to send him pictures of yourself, he wants to see what you look like everyday he’s missing you in real life
✧ you surprise visit HIM. he’s so happy he could cry. shows you around every place he loves, shows you off to everyone he knows, holds your hand the entire time and never wants to let go, is practically glued to you not that you mind  
✧ you spend your last night together lying in the grass, hand in hand, looking at the stars and sharing sweet kisses  
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tsukishima
✧ y’all went to separate universities. while he stayed relatively close to miyagi, you went across the country to okinawa, which was about a 3 hour flight away
✧ he sees all the couples around campus n becomes lowkey bitter, texts you immediately about gross pda like hand holding that he secretly wishes he could do with you “these people in relationships are too happy, i didn’t ask to see them gawk at each other all day” “u just miss me lmao”
✧ once overheard a convo on a shuttle at school that went like :
✧ person 1: “ugh, he’s so cute”
✧ person 2: “why dont you go out with him??”
✧ person 1: “i dunno, his dorm’s down the street, i can’t really do long distance”
✧ nANI (by the way, this is a irl conversation my friend overheard, oml)
✧ tsukki nearly choked on his morning coffee
✧ bothers texts you in class bc he’s bored and in need of your attention
✧ “hey tsukki this prof’s lectures are rlly dense, i needa focus, ill text u after”
✧ “but arent i more interesting than rocks”
✧ “trust me, id even rather watch some dino documentaries with you than be here”
✧ *read*
✧ likes to chat with you most nights as he lies in bed before going to sleep, staring up at the dark ceiling and listening to your voice through his headphones. usually just talking about how your days went (as if you weren’t texting all day) or just casual talk and banter
✧ you remind him to make sure he’s taking care of himself and eating well
✧ “who are you? my mother?”
✧ “no but you’re about to be single”
✧ surprise visits you, tells you it was yamaguchi’s idea when it was really his own and yamaguchi was just teasing him about it  
✧ you show him around the city, sharing what you know about its rich history and culture. you visit most areas you both wanted to see before calling it a day
✧ your roommate conveniently spends that night over at their friend’s they just wanna give you alone time, which y’all very much needed. you make it a note to repay your roommate somehow.
✧ sweet lovin that he’s been missing, then some spooning as you sleep    
a/n: just wanna tackle these about 4 characters at a time but if u wanna see this headcanon w/ other characters feel free to hmu w/ an ask <3<b> also sorry if i text type a lot and that im inconsistent with my apostrophes, let me know if that’s something you want me to fix! 
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