#until theyre unreachable

[tisziny]

I've been "having a bad day" for so many days now.

[half-of-the-story]

all good tkg fic should have shironeki being mysterious and unreachable until hide talks to kanekis his friends and theyre like ohhhhhh. be here at 10:13am exactly on a tuesday. and then u see kaneki sitting on the top of the bench reading a book like How To Be A Dad For Dummies. and he's put tabs on the pages and is crying about something

[rowavolo]

i think theres something so so so fucked up but also fascinatingly poetic in the angel au how both diavolo and rowan , at their very core, know that they are unworthy of the kind of love that is talked about in songs and stories and the kind of love that makes up ballads and sun dappled gouache paintings and yearning laments. these art forms, they werent made for their kind, let alone them personally. it's something unreachable, on the very cusp of unfathomable, enough to brush their fingertips across and know that it is sacred, divine in a way they will never ever be,

for the longest of times, they consider their love to be contractual, something that simply is, something to be tossed aside and ignored until it is required of them. of course they love one another, how could they not? their forms fit together so perfectly, like a two-piece jigsaw puzzle, each piece made only to hold the other so that they may be complete, only to be empty once again when they're inevitably separated.

each and every thing they do complements the other, even if it's not really supposed to, but theres a deeply rooted mundanity to it that causes both of them to sort of take it for granted. theyre like soulmates, intrinsically intertwined, but in a way that causes them to disregard their bond entirely and move on as if nothing had ever really changed in the first place.

they both love the other with their whole entire heart, yet don't believe the other feels the same, no matter how many times they may say or do things to prove otherwise, its like impostor syndrome but for an epic-spanning centuries-long romance of the Demon King and his Trapped Angel and theyre constantly on the verge of a scene where they run to each others arms in the empty airport parking lot in the rain and say that they love each other and feel like the other actually MEANS it but the scene never quite starts even as the music swells and one of them sits in the terminal while the other is looking out the window of their bus and AUUUGHHHH RAAAH RRRRAAAAAAAGH

[tsukisdiary]

how do you talk to your friends if their on twitter? do you just go through periods of no communication until you get a new account?

discord but for the most time, yes. i mean i dont need constant conversations with them to reassure me about our friendships. i can go on for long periods of no communication but then occasionally will check up on them, make sure theyre alright and ask whether ive missed out on anything, and it works i mean . im shit at keeping up communication with friends but that doesn't mean i love them any less.

i also try to remind them in any way possible how much they matter to me even if im not able to talk to them for weeks.

im a big fan of letting your friends now you always carry them with you regardless of how unreachable you may seem sometimes.

[racketballz]

I know this might be a reach but I would love it if bubbles and blossom (since I think she knows about the clubbing thing but I’m not sure) get into an argument and bubs exposes blossom and brick to the rest of the group in a heat of the moment way (she would obviously regret it)

Because then that would put a spotlight on the reds relationship and they would probably be overthinking about the way they’d be perceived by the other colors. Like blossom would probably be worried about being perceived as irresponsible and that her morals don’t apply with brick, and that she’s lost her good rep that she’s know for.

Brick probably wouldn’t care as much but I can imagine the world of shit he’d get from the boys, they’d rag on him for being a hypocrite (if boomer knows that word…) for telling them they need to stop their relationship with the girls, tell him he’s changed or maybe call him a douche for making blossom cry? But I don’t think they care about that they would just lose respect for him as their ���leader”

Just a thought:)

Hmmm I don’t think that bubbles would rat her out like that! That against sister code!!! But what’s interesting about reds that I think that’s also sometimes to pay attention to is that reds are constantly saving face right the whole point of those two is that they’re both smart as individuals they’re leaders and they’re mature and yadda yadda yadda but when they get together they’re completely a mess they’re DUMB suddenly and they don’t know how to lead they’re too busy screaming their heads off and completely immature and lose their cool! Like a double negative. Their relationship is a complete contradiction of their personalities

So this directly contradicted what I just said on purpose hehe but even tho they have this like unreachable smoke screen since theyre basically both like the pinnacle of perfect theYRE COMPLETELY TRANSPARENT you don’t think bubbles knows what going on? Boomer too knows what’s going on I don’t think it necessarily has to do with him until Brick said that he should break up with bubbles that’s why he called him jealous because he can’t put his ego aside to date a girl! Heck buttercup has like other shit (butch) she rather be paying attention to and she 100% knows whats going on because they’re so loud about it! EVERYONE knows! Everyone does 😭😭 they’re so obvious. I think their relationship is still very much a mystery because they also don’t know but it’s more like the intimate details that no one knows to me at least!

Also! blossom, yes is an over-thinker, But I don’t think that that she would that concerned with her sisters perception of her if she went to the club I think it would be a lil embarrassing if she was tattled on i guess?? But it’s not like…..they did anything idk like going to the club ISNT so big a deal (if it was a big deal blossom would have straight up not go) that they would all look at their leaders differently? To me? At least like if it that was the issue it would have been more relevant to the story me thinks. I think that before like “teammates” and stuff they’re siblings they’re very in tune with everyone’s personalities despite some of them trying to be aloof and ~mysterious~ THATS what makes them work well in the first place I think if anyone found out exactly what happened I think rather than gasps and grabbing pearls and like silent treatment I think you’d probably get like annoying groans and “I knew it’s” and like JEERING LOL

Also yeah also Brick I forgot to mention cares way more than blossom about their perception because hes a little bitch but that’s neither here or there

[jaegerboob]

WIP ROUNDUP!!

i was tagged by @trashpocket​ (hey bae ;)) and since im lonely here on tumblr and have no one but the void to yell at, i won’t be tagging anyone :((

okay let’s start off with my published WIPS lol i have quite a collection and boy do i regret posting most of these, but anyway that’s here’s my hot girl shit

"i’ll figure it out with a little more time” - (if u knew me at my thai BL phase no u didn’t :)) anyways this was a supposed to be a pretty short fic that features an oblivious Sarawat not knowing how to navigate his feelings towards Tine and Tine being an equally giant dumbass. their school is hosting a school dance and Sarawat’s emotionally constipated ass doesn’t know how to SPEAK and just ASK Tine to go w/ him. i swear i might be the author of this story but i also get mad at these fuckers

“we’re boyfriends?” - ah yes another Thai BL fic, i will admit. i have NO idea where to take this story lmao. i still wanna finish it tho cuz i hate disappointing ppl. the fic starts with Ae and Pond making a dumb bet so Pond will stop jerking off in their shared room and promises that he won’t do that as long Ae dates someone random and based off of Pond’s choosing. sweet bby Pete wanders into their campus accidentally  and gets picked. Ae does the deed and tells Pete they’re dating. Ae thinks that Pete and Pond are scheming to make his life a living hell but lo and behold Pete has actually fallen in love with him (heheheh) 

“i wanna ruin our friendship” - hello lgbtq+ community :). we all know where this fuckin title is from don’t be sneaky. so here’s my KilluGon college fic. I initially wrote this like two years ago and uploaded it on wattpad lmaooo then i edited it and posted on ao3 and once again i have no idea where to take this (ive forgotten what my original idea for this was lol) so basically Killua and Gon are really close friends and Gon is sortof a player in this AU idk why khdkadha but anywayz all of Gon’s exes have left him bc they’re jealous of Killua but Gon would never pick his current S/O over him so HAAA. it all goes to shit tho when Retz decides to trick Gon to taking her back for the school dance and idk what path to go for T_T 

AIGHT now for my UNPUBLISHED WIPS buckle up yall this is a LOT. all the titles are WIPS so that’s why theyre iffy lol

“pussy talented”- (don’t mind the title lmao i just wanted a cat pun in there somewhere) basically, Bokuto is a firefighter and Akaashi an editor. They work near each other and Bokuto often visits Kuroo, who works with Akaashi. Ofc Akaashi falls in love at first sight but then he overhears that he has a "Kenma" waiting for him at home. Akaashi assumes that he's probably Bo's boyfriend and then leaves him alone, making Bo confused as hell. Little that he knows that Kenma is actually a grumpy calico cat.

“killugon flower shop AU” - Wing owns a flower shop and Killua helps out with Zushi along with Alluka out of boredom and one day Alluka asks Killua to help out with her client then he meets Gon and is immediately smitten until Gon says that he's looking for something that he can give to a girlfriend (it was actually Ging's request lol), lots of misunderstanding, Killua being too shy to ask the handsome stranger out and Alluka and Zushi being done with his shit 

“rice isn’t the only thing getting crushed here” - Osamu falls in love with one of his most loyal costumers—Akaashi and he thinks he might just have a shot at it until one day while Akaashi is ordering a bunch of riceballs, Bokuto Koutaro of Japan's National Volleyball team enters the restaurant and sweeps Akaashi of his feet, unexpected angst and a generous helping of unrequited pining :)) dw this fic can go two ways: Bokuto is just Akaashi's best friend who he hasn't seen in months or b. Bokuto is actually Akaashi's fiance maybe i’ll write both endings heehee

“killua is sad and gets lovebombed” - while staying in Whale Island, Killua thinks he that he doesn't deserve Gon and tries to leave him while he's asleep but his plan is stopped when Gon wakes up and they both end up revealing their true feelings for each other

“excuse to write charles getting fucked by two delicious men” - Erik and Charles have been in a relationship for years now and basically fell out of love so when Erik gets promoted and has to move, Charles agrees and so they break up. Charles turns to Logan (who harbors a giant crush on Charles) for companionship and sleep together once. Logan says it was an accident but Charles wants more and they establish a FWB situation of sorts since Charles isn't ready yet. But then Charles gets into an accident and can't remember what happened the past year and a half so he still thinks he's with Erik. Meanwhile, Erik is living a luxurious yet empty life and when he gets the call from Raven about Charles' situation, he immediately goes back running.

“killua in whale island” - KilluGon are like 20-ish and Killua visits Whale Island and Ging just happens to be there as well. Killua thinks about how even though Gon and Ging are near identical, Gon just looks so much more handsome. (probs just a oneshot) 

 “another horny cherik fic” - Charles is a demon who was accidentally summoned when Raven, Hank and Ororo uses Erik's blood to perform a demon summoning ritual (as a joke) they didn't know it would actually work so now Charles is stuck with Erik because the human absolutely refuses to sell his soul

“IwaOi overboard AU” - Oikawa is a rich pretty boy and Iwa a college dropout who works at his uncle's repair shop with his younger brother Tobio and cousin Kyoutani ( both 5 yrs old). One day he gets called over to fix one of Oikawa's cars and after a failed and disastrous encounter with a drunk Oikawa, Iwa leaves the mansion fuming. Later in the day, it's discovered that Oikawa got in a car crash that took away his memories and since Oikawa apparently lives alone, he has no one to get him. not until Iwa comes ofc and with a malicious and vengeful intent, he tells Oikawa that they're dating and live together in his crappy apartment

“dancer Akaashi” - Akaashi is a dancer, Osamu is a bartender at the bar he works at and has also been in love with Akaashi for the past two years. He doesn't confess since he knows Akaashi doesn't like romance but then enters a bright eyed cheery Bokuto who sweeps the unreachable Midnight Moon off of his feet, bokuaka but im leaning towards bokuosaaka since akaashi deserves two boyfriends

“watch me be poetically horny for Akaashi Keiji” - Akaashi is a vampire and Osamu, a skilled artist. Akaashi posing nude and delighted at how beautifully Osamu portrays him. Osamu says otherwise. 

Cherik College AU - drift by great gable.... late teens cherik... Erik being a misanthropic horny bastard and Charles a snarky piece of shit.... they get paired up for 7 minutes in heaven... turns out Charles has been ogling him for a while now..  hmmmm,,,.,. ( i wrote this when i was drunk and my og draft is too long so take this instead lolz) 

“ BokuAka (NSFW) ” - Bokuto pushing off a guy who tried to hit on Akaashi while they're at a club. Akaashi gets so turned on he immediately drags Bokuto to the bathroom where he gets his facefucked in one of the bathroom stalls or Akaashi getting his face fucked in a dirty alley at the back of a bar after Bokuto gets into a fistfight.

“KuroKen (NSFW)  ” -Kenma does top during sex but but he's just really lazy to put in the effort 

aight that’s it oh damn i just now realize how much i have T-T bruhhhhhhh and this isn’t even all of them damnnn 

[breathof-fics]

Could i request genya + kratos/persephone for any prompt (you choose) please? Theyre all so good i can't decide (⁀ᗢ⁀) Thank you ♥️♥️

GENYA + KRATOS AND PERSEPHONE. PROMPT 17. “HER MASK IS CRACKING; IT WAS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME UNTIL THEY SAW THE DEMON THAT SHE HID.”

they have met under coincidental circumstances; having to be under the wing of the same mentor, their meeting is inevitable. at first glance, she is as soft as the petals of the first flower to bloom in spring — so gentle-spoken, shy and introverted. genya doesn’t understand why he was so attracted to her in the first place upon first meeting; he has always been a man who overexerts his own power, to reach the unreachable, to gain praises from his older brother who wanted him anywhere else but the corps.

her mask was cracking; it was only a matter of time until they saw the demon that she hid. it was only a matter of time that genya truly sees her true potential on a battlefield; every graceful turns and twists are matched with the brutality of every swing of her sword, finishing the job faster than every other slayers he had seen. still, she maintains such a tender expression, timid. 

genya has underestimated her; a flower with petals so soft can grow into something more dangerous than roses with thorns. 

[cocona]

sunshine, loml 🏹💌 pls roast the other loves of my life, jin and yoongi

ok peanut 😔😔

jin:

ok that guy is a comedic genius n doesnt deserve half the shit he gets, n he deserves the shit he doesnt get from his company. idk how to roast him ! unproblematic legend ! sometimes sounds like a duck tho !! n he’s loud as FUCK ! god 70% of my 2nd hand embarassment comes from jin tbh

jin stans: they argue. at all times. all the time. they end up sounding like the king but dont even get to his level. it’s not even funny anymore. it’s exhausting ! theres always sth wrong w bts ! bigshit ! the fans ! journalists ! music ! apps ! n wtv !!!!!! theyre rlly loud. more often than not theyre making a point but theyve said the same things so many times that we no longer hear them. idk. also @ jin stans i own a pc of ur man so if u want it we can trade.

yoongi:

i have to say. his voice was always very annoying to me for some reason. ik he’s comfortable but i wish he got out of his shell sometimes. hes got lots of things to say n theyre more often than not v relevant n funny n heartfelt ! so ! speak up my dude ! idk thats all i have to say abt him.

myg stans: whats w the dark aes. whats w being dark all the time. yall r nice n all but ur so intimidating !!! & also ure so into ur man that i thought he was the leader for YEARS until i got to know the boys. ur always overanalysing everything but @ least most of ur theories r valid. like jimin stans. hes not that small guys. hes indeed got a petite frame but hes not a lillipucian n for all ik he’s not lethargic either ! also yall make it seem like he’s unreachable. relax. he’s a human being & is as normal as u n me, he may be relatable but u need to differentiate joking & not being ok. speaking of it. stop complaining abt how he needs to lead his life. hes trying like all of us n its not bc hes an idol n that he’s wealthy that he doesnt face difficult issues as well ! other than that yall r p chill. idk.

send me an idol & i’ll roast them + their fans

[woozi]

*waves* hi yza!! car crash anon here, it was nice to hear from you too!! I’ll be honest my first thought seeing ur response was “wow the shirt in that reaction pic is red, too” so u can fully see the extent of my brainrot. but I’ve actually gotten some more motivation to pick it up and am enjoying it! ok genuinely tho I was analyzing the coke zero lyrics half as a joke but now I am fully serious. I actually think my theory abt woozi not knowing abt the redesign is Crucial to the concept of the song *clears throat* so like, mv aside, the whole song “ruby” is obsessed w/ like… ruby and the color red. this person thats making the narrator go crazy over them. however, red isnt just what the person of interest (poi) wears or has (lips)—red is like… symbolic of the attraction itself. it’s what ties them together + reflects them in each other—as many things as the song references I feel like there’s a consistent pattern of the narrator being touched devoured or otherwise connected to red, as much as the poi? special attention to the “I see myself in you” line—the narrator is seeing red, the colour of infatuation, attraction, a children’s hospital (lol)… but like the poi is red, the narrator is red as well. idk mv this was obvious and I’m saying nothing new but like even the whole prechorus w/ the “making me a beautiful jewel” and “every time I look at you, I keep turning red” “go color me like you” so it’s like idk. the way red is literally inescapable and devouring him? the narrators had his heart taken captive so like, because everything about poi is red, everything abt him also becomes red. so like… even a Coke Zero, which hasn’t, until quite recently, become predominantly red, also becomes red… and it’s like. wow even in the most mundane bits of life the red will stay. not only will it stay it’ll change things into red. like idk maybe it’s not that #deep BUT I do think it’s interesting how the narrator has like lyrics of. wow he’s drinking a soda. he refers to the poi as “my forbidden fruit” right like it’s all… there he almost seems to suggest that this sort of obsession or love is some kind of desire that it’s his choice to fall into—a fruit he’s chosen to consume… but if anything, it seems like the other person here is the one consuming him—his attention, his attraction, his love, his vision, etc. ALSO the like sorta edited vocals in the back during his guitar part r like “ruby eyes, ruby ocean […] baby my eyes are ruby” (I hear it as maybe personally but my analysis doesn’t actually change with that) SO. idk I feel like eyes r always important conceptually window to the soul etc etc so I feel like that’s the moment u know like. ok now narrator has become like fully enamoured or whatever. now for what purpose am I saying all of this? well nothing really. but ALSO may I propose ruby: halloween (specifically vampire) ver. everything lines up. blinded by the shine? easy peasy theyre like the twilight sparklepires. ok w/ that joke out of the way lol. uhhh the infatuation situation have where the narrator is being consumed but also is infatuated. same way a vampire might enchant / seduce it’s prey. the forbidden fruit. poi is literally a vampire that’s all very dark and unreachable. but it’s also something u literally can’t reject? the whole go color me like you turning red thing… blood drinking. other vampire motifs u can have a blood moon somewhere too. what is a ruby ocean but blood really. easy. at the guitar solo now the narrator gets to turn into a “ruby” vampire too. ruby lips WOW ITS ALMOST LIKE IF YOU ENGAGE IN DRINKING BLOOD UR LIPS GET STAINED RED… etc etc. ill take my leave now lol ty for ur support once again! also I dunno if it was weird to use narrator and poi instead of like. saying woozis name but I wanted to be formal and like the person singing the song does not always = character / concept theyre embodying hence my choice ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. have a good day/night/ambiguous time of day!

reading through this was an experience to say the least JKFDFKJDFKDJ

[theoneyouneed]

Ahhh shit here we go

Prince Seto Kaiba is the allusive and cold ruler of Duelist Kingdom, a territory that is large and influential.

Yugi is a regular man. A mage perhaps. And Atem is the spirit trapped inside him in an accidental miracle.

They have to get to seto Kaiba somehow, as distant and unreachable as he is, because they think they found his younger brother?

Kaiba is the ruler or soon to be ruler, he is fighting hard to ensure his position. He is also a skilled fighter. Something of a vigilante, doing dirty work in the dark. Because of his fragile balance of position, he’s restricted in what he can do despite his power.

Atem and Yugi share the same position or occupation, as mages or the like. Atem lost his body and was bound inside of Yugi’s for some reason. They now share the same body, the same mind space, despite not even knowing each other before this happened.

Mokuba was kidnapped, or he was stranded in an escape somehow. Either way he’s lost in rural ass nowhere when Yugi and Atem find him.

Possible Mokuba has amnesia?

They figure out pretty quick that this is the lost royal brother and they should absolutely try to get him returned home safe.

It just sucks that maybe mages aren’t favored in the public eye.

Oh damn what if I actually pulled in the card game lore?? All the magicians and dragons and shit.

Some people somewhere are trying to build machines to take out the magicians because of theyre op. The mécha are ah not ideal however.

Someone close to kaiba is making a mécha dragon, perhaps odd eyes?

Yugi takes on the persona of the dark magician when he’s fighting. Maybe the cards are like resonance deities that you can form a connection to and call upon for power.

Yugi and Atem were both connected to the dark magician.

Kaiba has blue eyes.

Boy somebody has gotta be here with gagaga cowboy just for the meme.

So anyway about the fucking romance...

Obvi Atem is on a quest to get his body back or get a body. Maybe at the end he gets a body because of the mécha end game. Like if the mécha was hoarding all the magic energy and when they get to the crux of it it’s all released and the bounce back just fills Atem with so much magic he gets a body lol.

Atem had more time to weave a deeper connection to the dark magician, so when they’re fighting they usually let Atem take control. This becomes that kaiba and Atem interact more than Yugi and kaiba do.

Of the three of them, it goes like this. Yugi falls for Atem. Atem falls for kaiba, Atem falls for Yugi, Kaiba falls for Atem, Yugi falls for kaiba, kaiba falls for Yugi. Cool now they all like each other and that is not at all confusing

Yugi, as with every fic I write, thinks that he is just the bridge between kaiba and Atem, they would be better if he weren’t there, he likes them both, but they both like each other so much more than they like him...

Kaiba is at first comforted by the strength of this person. (He feels safe) before he is startled and shocked at the warmth, and kindness in their heart, and the gentleness in their touch (he feels safe) . He’s the kind of character that doesn’t even realize he’s touch starved until he’s being forced into a hug. He doesn’t even realize that he hasn’t felt safe his entire life until he was shielded by Atem, and held by Yugi.

Okiayyy maybe I’ll even write this one ahaha

[beautybonesnymph]

Purged for the first time ever on purpose...I've been restricting my cal intake to under 1000cal and its been going okay so far, there's been a couple days where I'd eat almost double that and that doesn't make me feel good.

I should go easy on myself since I just started to seriously count calories this past week so a few days over eating is to be expected.

I purged my breakfast this morning which were fruit loops and theyre SO high in calories for 2cups, I get it but I didn't want to not eat them cos I'm very lazy today instead of making my usual breakfast (poached eggs with toast) and still wanted to enjoy them. I'm sure I didn't get rid of it all in my belly but it was my first time so if it can cut what I took in half i'll take that as a win.

My goal was to lose 2lbs a week but I feel that's unreachable if I still want a decent normalish cal intake. I think it'll be hard to lose weight for some time until it warms up so I can go on bike rides.

I'm also trying manifestation to keep myself from overeating and manifest losing weight. I hope when I step on the scale this Tuesday it'll be around 128lbs.

[socialattractionuk]

Muslim men explain why it’s difficult to find a partner to marry

(Picture: Ella Byworth for Metro.co.uk)

It’s a truth universally known; dating sucks.

But not all communities date. Muslims, for example, often get to know potential suitors with the aim of getting married as soon as possible. This is to avoid premarital sex.

The dating pool might not scream talent, no matter what your preferences are, but when you add religion to the mix – in that, you’re trying to find someone on the same religious level as you – the pool may become smaller.

Recently, we wrote about why Muslim women find it difficult to find a partner. A lot of the women said the issue came down to men not meeting them at their level.

But Muslim men also face challenges in finding someone to spend their lives with.

After all, Muslim men, like any group, are not a monolith – not all are mollycoddled and sheltered individuals, unable to reach the standards of Muslim women.

We spoke to five different Muslims based in the UK, US, and Canada.

Don, 28

The biggest challenge in preparing myself for marriage lies in the economic barriers to success. With housing prices so high, and enormous competition for high salaried positions, it feels like if you haven’t met a set of arbitrary, sometimes unreachable goals, you’re not worthy of the long term investment needed for a marriage.

The persistent idea that you are measured against your salary and how much you’ve achieved by a certain time in your life can leave you feeling inadequate.

In addition, having been raised Muslim but not necessarily having dated Muslim women, it can often feel like my value set isn’t sought after in a culture that seemingly rewards excess or wealth.

It makes the search for someone special considerably [difficult] and has proven itself a likely pitfall for heartache when values inevitably clash in a long term relationship.

Mustafa, 27, UK

Muslim dating apps are shit and the time it takes to communicate with someone is a turn off itself.

It’s a Muslim dating app and therefore you’re stepping on eggshells when it comes to flirting. Some don’t reciprocate the flirting which turns you off from flirting at all!

Some women certainly have a list of things they want in a man. Some are so expansive, it’s not surprising they’re still single.

And I’ve generally heard that the men on there are either boring or just trash.

I think in general both sexes don’t know how to approach the app by being themselves. I think they’re scared of the unknown or having the fear of being judged.

If you’re not meeting people via an app, it’s awkward meeting someone in real life especially if they bring someone with them. A lot of women also have a preconceived idea of men from certain areas, such as Tower Hamlets.

One thing I find is that a lot of girls don’t have confidence and don’t show off their personality on the first meeting.

(Picture: MMuffin for Metro.co.uk)

Nahid, 34, U.S

At a certain age, (over 30) it becomes easier for men to find partners than it is for women. This doesn’t seem unique to Muslim or South Asian culture.

I assume it’s because women tend to want to settle down at an earlier age as being single after a certain age is still somewhat frowned upon. Women are more willing at an older age to settle or work out the differences. They don’t want to be outside of societal norms.

But in some ways, I find that men of my age, ethnic and religious background in the west have to work a tad bit harder to find a suitable partner, especially if we’re limiting ourselves to partners of a similar background.

That’s because most of the backlash against Muslims is geared towards Muslim men. Women, in general, are viewed as victims of male oppression.

So it becomes our burden to prove that we’re not the oppressor and work harder to prove that.

More: Dating

Muslim men explain why it's so difficult to find a partner to marry

Every horrible 2019 dating stage and what they mean

What does DTF mean?

Our understanding of success in Muslim /Asian culture pivots around the notion that we’ll get married and settle down with kids.

Men’s goals and aspirations don’t usually stop there but women’s goals and aspirations are usually limited after marriage. A large part of female success is therefore defined by finding the right partner for her ‘success’.

I wouldn’t say women are inherently less ambitious, but their ambitions are not directed to what a capitalist part of the world would call success.

Also, women from a Muslim background have culturally been dependent on male support, financially.

Not only am I fighting Islamophobia, at the same time I’m fighting to liberate women from male dependency. These all take a mental toll and make it harder to marry.

Jamil, 26, UK

I don’t think it’s actually that hard to find a partner when you’re a Muslim man.

I know loads of people (male and female) who are finding partners and getting married.

However, I do think marriage feels like a huge deal in the Asian Muslim community, so when people of a marriageable age start thinking about it, it feels like a huge pressure to find someone that they’re compatible with, especially when it’s something they may have neglected whilst they were pursuing other things like education, career, or travelling etc.

Also, I think people feel like they have to be the finished package before they are ready to spend their life with someone as opposed to growing as an individual with someone which can cause them to delay or neglect meeting people.

It doesn’t help that Asian weddings can be very expensive, so before considering getting married, many need to make sure they’ve got healthy bank balances.

More: Dating

Muslim men explain why it's so difficult to find a partner to marry

Every horrible 2019 dating stage and what they mean

What does DTF mean?

Aden, 33, Canada

I spent a large part of my youth chasing the wrong things and neglecting my responsibilities. I think the family dynamic in my household and many other Muslim households has caused us as youth to make up our own ideals of how a wife or husband should be.

I personally would like to apologise to all the young Muslim women who have worked hard to help their families and educate themselves while some young Muslim men have gotten lost chasing the wrong things in life. We men have done a great dishonour to our Muslim women and our responsibilities as Muslim men.

Most guys don’t get themselves together until they hit their 30s, that’s if they ever get it together, and by that time most guys will look to marry younger girls which in my opinion is wrong.

Muslim men need to take a page out of Ilhan Omar’s husband’s book, who stands by his wife and elevates her by supporting her.

My recommendation to Muslim women who are single and looking for marriage is; be positive at all costs while also practicing sabr (patience) and remember that God tests the ones he loves with the greatest tests so be patient and your reward will be great.

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[ingloriousbi]

im so fucking scared. the deathtoll went up to 10 and most of dutchside is unaccounted for. UTS tower is down, so no telecoms internet, no water and electricty, and no one can get to the cul de sac neighbourhoods. a fucking tornado hit and via-via-via we’re hearing that apparently not a single house has an intact roof at our street. a car fell down from the mountain into another family’s garden (thankfully no one hit). i was totally fine yesterday until i got back from dinner and now idk what to do anymore. and my mom called bc it just didnt even occur to me to call her, and she was worried i didnt even know abt it bc she assumed id call her, so now im struggling with no knowledge on my dad and feeling guilty bc it didnt even occur to talk to my mom abt this. she did have contact during the hurricane with friends, but theyre’ on the other side of the island from my dad and they are unreachable now too. my friends family in st. johns across from saunders are safe and the street looks fine, but they werent hit with the eye so idk. military has no aerial overview of the cul de sac yet and probably couldnt get people on the ground if they did. hurricane jose will probably hit this saturday. idk what the fuck to do.