#waiting on the day when i can speak to the audience @ my job like that

[luveline]

PLEASE I NEED MORE STRIPPER READER X AARON

cw reader is able to wear hotch's clothes, adult theme mdni

Your hands ache. You have calluses on your palm, unsightly, but if you were to soak them off you'd bleed. 

The club is practically dead. You can get away with a low effort routine —old men and day drunks don't care what you're doing so long as they can see your chest. The level of undress is your choice (though the girls willing to dance fully nude get the better slots, obviously), and you've been doing this for long enough that it doesn't really bother you when a patron shouts for you to take your bra off. Your hand is slipping behind your back for the clasp when you notice him near the bar. 

Agent Hotchner —you can call me Hotch— usually catches your attention and leaves. A quick nod after he's met your eyes, he'll wait for you to get dressed and meet him out front near his intimidating car. But today he watches even after you smile hello, and someone close by throws a ten at your feet like you'd been smiling for them. He's expressionless. 

It's far more difficult to finish your dance knowing he's watching. He doesn't stay for long, ten seconds at most, but those ten seconds are much longer than he's ever watched you perform before. 

You finish your dance, collect your tips, and trudge back to the dressing rooms. You would've made more money if you'd stripped down. Not much considering the small audience, but some. You can't explain why seeing Hotch had made you stay your hand, maybe because he's one of the only men you know who treats you like you're fully human. You don't want that to change.

It's colder outside than it was when you arrived. Traffic is picking up as people leave their jobs for the day, and the club will be busier in the night hours. You'll stay, hopefully make enough for food this week. 

"Are you warm enough?" he asks immediately. 

"I didn't bring my jacket." You shrug. "I'd rather be out here with you." Than go back inside, no matter how cold. 

He opens his trunk with a click of the key fob and disappears behind the tail end. You can see his arm move, a bundle of black fabric. His arm flexes as he closes the trunk, and his eyebrows have hooked together when he returns to you. 

"Here," he says, "it should fit." 

Just a simple charcoal quarter zip. You shrug it on over your clothes and find yourself immediately greeted by the smell of men's cologne. His cologne. 

"What can I help you with today, Mr. Hotchner?" you ask. You're flirting in that useless way where it doesn't mean a thing, and he knows that, because, as you've come to find about these special agents, they know everything. 

"I wanted to ask you to dinner." 

"Oh, I don't… I don't do the escort stuff," you say gently. 

"I know." He turns his head away from you. "I realise that it's unprofessional. I know it puts you in an uncomfortable position to say no. But I want to take you out for dinner, if you'd let me." 

You stare at him. "I won't sleep with you after one fancy dinner–" 

"It's not like that." He speaks so calmly, so quietly. 

It doesn't make any sense. He's a professional man in a successful career, with a son if you remember correctly, and a circle of peers his own age and status. If he doesn't want to fuck you, if he really wants to take you out for dinner, that's a date. 

"What, you want to be my boyfriend?" you ask, shaking your head, lips pulled down in a frustrated frown. 

"I– well, if things went well, I wouldn't be opposed to it." He laughs. 

"Are you messing with me?" 

"No, I'm sorry. I just wasn't prepared for the question." 

He meets you head on. Face to face and eye to eye, he looks at you with, for once, a completely readable expression. It's a bit startling. The slight lift to his brow and his half-smile, it's an expression that says, If you want to. It puts all the choice in your hands. 

"I know we don't know one another that well, I," —his eyes soften another shade, tenderness like no one's ever given you— "wanted to make my intentions clear to you. I didn't want to continue our professional relationship and then pull the rug out from under you later." 

You know Hotch through car rides, mostly. He's taken you home from a couple of places now, usually after he's asked you questions about someone or something to do with the sex trafficking ring currently being squashed in Virginia. He's nice. You've told him without fretting about the consequences that he's handsome. When you first met, you asked him why gentlemen like him didn't come to see you dance. 

You didn't think the answer was that they might grow to have feelings for you. 

You wonder if he's just lonely. But lonely Hotch could still have a number of women that aren't you, right? 

"Like you'd never get a handle on it?" you ask, subtly teasing.

He reacts to your tone visibly. His smile gets worse, which is to say better, and his voice sounds similarly teasing as he answers, "I tried to. That's exactly what you need, another old man with the wrong idea." 

"I don't think you have the wrong idea, Hotch." 

"But you don't reject that I'm old?" 

You leap to correct him through laughter, surprised at his quick wit, and he leaps to let you know he's kidding through his own. You tell him while things are warm that you'd like to go to dinner with him, if he really means it, and he holds one of your hands like a prince, thumb ghosting over your knuckles, unafraid of the calluses on your hands. He touches you like you're made of glass. 

You try to give him back his jacket before he leaves, but he insists you keep it. "If you freeze before I get to take you out, I won't forgive you." 

Huh, you think as he drives away, waving, the sleeve of his borrowed jacket falling down your arm. Who knew Special Agent Hotchner was a flirt? 

[moonstruckme]

You’re poly!marauders writings literally soothe my anxiety I love it so much. Could I please request poly!marauders comforting reader the night before a big presentation she’s super anxious for because she hates public speaking. I feel like they’d be so soft and encouraging when they realise how sad and anxious she is about it. You’re the best lovely 💗💖🩷

Thanks sweetheart!

poly!marauders x fem!reader ♡ 957 words

James erupts in applause as you click to the final slide, and Sirius sticks his fingers in his mouth, whistling loudly. 

“Fantastic job!” James gushes, fawning. “Never seen anything like it. Will this presentation be considered for a nobel prize?”

“It ought to be,” Remus agrees, also clapping, albeit more normally. “That was great, dove. They’re gonna love it.” 

“Are you sure?” You look to the screen uncertainty. “The ‘thank you’ slide isn’t too informal?”

“No,” Remus confirms. “I think it’s the perfect way to signal that you’re done.” 

“But did I talk too fast? I do that sometimes.” 

He gives you an odd look. “Did you think you were talking too fast?” 

You shrug, looking at your pajama bottoms like there’s something interesting down there. “I can’t always hear it myself. Maybe I should run it through one more time, and you can let me know?”

“Wait, again?” Sirius sounds slightly alarmed. “This is a very interesting topic, but I think six practice rounds is probably enough. What, are you gonna give us a test or something?” 

You cringe. “Sorry, I don’t mean to keep you captive. I can practice it by myself.” 

You close your laptop, thinking of going to your room, but James says, “Wait, sweetheart, why do you think you need to run through it so many times? It seems like you’ve got it.” 

“I just need it to be, like, muscle memory,” you reply. “A lot of the time, once I get up there, I sort of…it’s almost like I can’t think anymore, and if I don’t know the presentation super well I won’t know what to say.” 

“I don’t think you need to worry as much as you are.” James’ voice has gone soft in that way he does when he wants to be extra kind. “Every time you’ve run through it tonight, it’s been flawless.” 

You scoff. “Yeah, because it’s just you guys.” 

“Oi,” Sirius pipes up, faux indignant. “I’ll have you know we are the most critical audience you’ll ever meet. If you can do it in front of us, those dolts will be no problem.” 

“Yeah, don’t be nervous.” James gives you a smile. “You’re going to do great.” 

“That’s a lot easier said than done,” you sigh. 

Remus pats the arm of his chair, and you abandon your laptop, letting him pull you into his lap. Your boyfriends have the ability to bring emotions you didn’t even know you had straight to the surface, and you feel unexpectedly teary as he kisses your temple. “Would it make you feel better if we came to watch tomorrow?” he asks lightly. 

You give him a small, sad smile. “Thanks, but even if you did, everyone else would still be there. It’d be a pointless trip for you.” 

“Not if you could have a hug afterwards.” He sets his chin atop your head like he’s going to make you a fortress out of his own body. “Or if you just want support in the audience, we don’t mind.” 

“I appreciate it,” you reply, “but I’ll be okay. I just need to get it down so that I don’t mess up.” 

“And what if you do mess up?” Sirius asks, characteristically blunt. “Would it really be the worst thing in the world?”

You blush, and Remus rubs your upper arm comfortingly. “No,” you admit. “It would just be embarrassing. It would kind of ruin my day, to be honest.” 

Sirius nods, looking at you evenly. “But then you get to come home, and it’ll be over. Maybe we can get you a treat or something to have tomorrow evening after you get home. That way you get a reward no matter what.” 

You fidget in Remus’ hold, and you know they’re not going to like what you’re thinking, but you say it anyway. “I won’t deserve a reward if I mess up, though.” 

“That’s not true,” James fires back instantly. “The reward doesn’t have to be only for if you give your presentation without a single hitch. It could just be for trying.” 

You’re quiet, pleading silently for a change in topic. Remus drops another kiss on the side of your head. “You’ve worked hard on this, dovey. It’s really good, and even if everything doesn’t go as planned tomorrow, you still put a lot into it,” he pauses, stooping his head so you’re looking at him. “You deserve to feel good about yourself.” 

You try to shrink, but he won’t let you, trapping you with an immovable arm around your shoulders. Remus is strong when he wants to be. He raises his eyebrows, a tiny smirk playing on his lips, until you smile. 

“Okay, you’re right,” you capitulate, leaning your head on his shoulder. “Thank you guys.” 

“Maybe it’d help if you got the presentation off your mind and just relaxed for the rest of the night,” James suggests. “There’s no point in fixating on it anymore, you’ve done all you can.” 

“Yeah, that sounds good,” you say, and then Sirius is squishing into you and Remus’ chair, sitting half on top of both of you. 

“Our poor baby,” he whines, words muffled against your cheek. “I’m sorry I made fun of your practice, sweetpea. I didn’t know you were so nervous.” 

You laugh as he moves down to your neck. “It’s okay, it’s—quit, that tickles!”

Sirius ignores you, pecking relentlessly up and down your neck as Remus struggles to keep the both of you from falling off the armchair. “You’re going to do so good,” he promises ardently. “You know that, right?”

“She doesn’t even have to know it,” James speaks for you as you gasp for breath between giggles. “We know well enough to make up for her.” 

[matt1tudes]

matt sturniolo x singer!reader headcannons

a/n: first post kinda nervous 😣

.ೃ࿐

♫. matt would obviously be your #1 supporter

♫. there’s no doubt in my mind that every song of yours is on his playlist, and that he would never get bored of hearing them no matter how many times he already has

♫. you’re his most streamed artist on his spotify wrapped 100%

♫. if you’re on tour, he’d want to be by your side 24/7, but seeing as his job is basically documenting his life… 😬 he’d only be able to make it to your LA and boston shows (which are both places you find yourself spending a lot more time in than other places…)

♫. he’d be in the vip tent along with his brothers, and the people closest to you

♫. but your fans aren’t really paying attention to the other people in the tent when they can see your boyfriend staring at you with such a look of admiration and love, and they can’t help themselves when they record him as he watches you do your thing (which is killing it on stage)

♫. also wanted to say that if you write a song about him, be prepared for him to almost cry, or full on sob when he hears it for the first time

“this is about me?”

“of course it’s about you, baby.”

♫. he’d definitely drive you to and from your regular recording studio and always makes sure you go in there with the confidence of taking over the industry (props to his amazing words of motivation ofc)

♫. speaking of words of motivation—if you ever were to beat yourself up over not being able to write a song, or not hitting that one note you were aiming for when recording a song, he’d immediately stop you and try his best to make you see yourself the way he does; like you hung the moon and the stars piece by piece yourself

♫. he’d be waiting for you backstage after every one of your shows (the ones he attends lol) and shower you with compliments as he helps you get into more comfortable clothes, even if you insist that you can do it yourself

“matt, i can change myself—”

“shhh. just let me do this.”

“did you just shush me?”

♫. if you were in a band, he’d get along with your bandmates very well, obviously wanting to have a good relationship with the people you’re extremely close with

♫. since we’re on the topic of bands and whatnot, if you ever were to announce a solo album, he’d be so insanely proud of you and he would not be afraid to express it!

♫. after you post the announcement, he’d put it on his own story along with a long paragraph telling the world how proud he is of his girl and how far she’s come with her own career

♫. he’d watch any award shows you’re nominated in from the comfort of his house (and you don’t hold it against him)

♫. and just because he’s not there in person doesn’t mean he’s any less supportive. he’d be spamming your texts while watching the live stream, but he doesn’t expect a response from you until after the event, knowing you’re unable to answer

♫. nick and chris have gotten used to that fact after the first two shows you attended, so if your events happen to be on days where they need to record content, they always record during the day, or just before the events start in general, so they can leave matt to his one-sided conversations until you text him back

♫. back to the topic of tours, he’d always be there when you need to rehearse, or do soundchecks and all that

♫. he’d take pictures of you from where the audience would be and post them on his instagram story, showing you off

♫. overall, matt would be an amazing support system, and boyfriend

[haechurch]

forgetting me, forgetting you

It's not the way that jeno doesn't look at you the same. It's not the way of him chasing after a girl and leaving you behind in the evening downpour. It's not the way jeno said he didn't even love you that night. It's just nothing but your broken heart.

pairing: idol!jeno x fem!reader

genre: smut, fluff (kinda), angstt

wc: 4.8+k

warnings: minors dni, unprotected sex, oral (m, f receive), spitting, kind of meanie jeno, implied exhibitionist, degrading, praising, spanking, teasing, fingering, tons of pet name, hard and soft sex, etc etc, you know when i said idol and fan relationship its just so unreal as well as how their jobs work lmao ((i had a problem to make this at least a lil bit realistic) also not seem too delusional but- just pls dont @ me, i mean its a fic)

! how embarrassing that this shit got posted accidentally (i hate tmblr) my pupils were literally shaking lol. for those who might accidentally saw this (i know theres not even a soul who cares abt it..) ofc i had this to be revised also its inspired by rv song, in my dreams, (originally the title for this one but i changed it!) i might also have songs recommendation, its [coldplay-yellow > conan gray-astronomy > yoari-dice game > exo-hurt > davichi-forgetting you > red velvet-in my dreams]

Everything was pandemonium from the start. You saw jeno in person for the first time in the concert venue. Yes. He is the singer. That singer. A born-talented, handsome, lovable idol from nct. He didn't even know you were there, in the crowd of audience hyping his band up. Never in your dreams you thought you'd met him in person, but fate brings you two together. It was what you believed until then. Fate brings your jeno who has never been yours in the first place to kindly remind you that he will never be yours even at the end of the time.

You worked hard for your pay. You work as an employee (that mostly work for dreamies) under jeno's company after you earned your post graduate title while studying in korea. That point when you made it out, you never even thought that this was a real chance to finally get him.

That's just insane, to get lee jeno, in a somehow, romantic way. But you tried anyway. Ordinary person with an extraordinary person? Or can you just say idols and fans relationship? That jeno from all the people living on this earth? Mostly impossible. Those who live around you will think you're crazy for wanting someone who literally exists in a different world from you. Even though you're 'coexisting' with him and seeing him from time to time, that would not be enough; so near yet so far.

It's so hard to work under the company and let it flow at first. Without a will, you'll never get what you want. Even though this one is nearly impossible, you attempt to keep the mindset that revolves around you: it will work if you try, try, try and try.

But it's useless. Who do you think you are? You can't even be allowed to speak nor get close to him except if it's necessary. It's hard to work with him like a normal acquaintance. To them, to jeno, you're simply invisible. 

However, you did make it clear enough. No surrendering. That's the least you can keep in mind. 

But again, he didn't even spare you a glimpse.

Then there was this day when you two were put together in the same dressing room, waiting for some interviews coming up. There's actually no reason for you to not share the same room because technically, you're their regular staff. The rest of the members and other staff were nowhere to be found, it was you and him. You and jeno all alone in the same room. You nearly choked yourself when you were about to open your mouth as jeno scooted to where you sat. 

"Hi." He lightly started the conversation. You swear to god you can hear your own heartbeat. Keeping yourself calm and professional, you hum and put the sweetest smile to him. "Hello."

"I'm so sorry if i sound rude, but i believe we're around the same age? I've been seen you around and i just knew you're a regular staff in here," you intensely stared at him, eyes widened in disbelief that he just casually- 

"We can be friends if you wan-" 

"We can?!"

-asked you to be his friend.

Realizing you just replied to him in 0,023 seconds, you covered your mouth and muttered 'sorry' to him. He just laughed. Oh. That laugh.

That's when you feel like you two were 'getting closer' as he asked you to be his friend for some idiotic reason (u really have no idea why the universe would gave you this kind of, miracle, you'd say, but you're fucking grateful).

Of course you can be friends with everyone. Also a staff (fan) and an artist couldn't be an exception, right? But once again who are you kidding, lee jeno is super busy, and you should know it could probably the friendship that only lasts for four hours.

You didn't meet jeno for weeks and you missed him so bad. Sometimes you got to talk to him after he befriend you (tho it happens only if you had that rare chance) but both of you didn't get a long time to properly talk and have a good conversation. And it's been a long time, you just missed him.

Did he perhaps miss you too? Did he ever think about you even just for a split second? You shake your head from the thoughts and scoff at yourself. He probably already erased you from his memory. And that night, you drifted into a deep slumber whilst thinking about how he wouldn't remember you.

―

But you were dead wrong. That day was very hot because apparently, it's in the middle of summer, and you were called for a job in a broadcasting house which happened to be the same place for the band to attend their schedule.

You're standing in front of a vending machine, getting a drink when you hear someone call your name. You turned around and found jeno, looking at you with his smiling eyes.

"Jeno!? What are you doing here?" You can't hide your pearly whites when you see him, so please meet him again after a while.

"We're having some jobs here. How about you?" He asked. 

"Um, me too! But mine's still running, i take a little coffee break right before come back to the site. Have you finished yours?"

"Yes, actually," jeno scratched his nape awkwardly before he continued. "Uhh, do you perhaps want to meet me after you are done? Just for a sec?" He asked.

"Sure! I'll text you when i'm done?" 

Yes, you both are having each other's numbers but can't even communicate a single thing through it. He didn't text you. And you, being the one who shamelessly asked for his numbers which he gladly gave it, never once texts him because as you can see, you're being professional enough to keep your words that it's only for the matter of work.

"Cool." You both smiled to each other and stood awkwardly for a good seconds until jeno left. 

So, did he just wait for you until you're done because he said he just finished his schedule? Is that even possible for him to do that?

The answer is yes. Though with a little bit of delay. He asked you to meet him after you're done, just to have you wait for him in the nearby cafe for nearly 20 minutes.

Jeno: uhh hi its jeno

Jeno: im so sorry for keeping you waiting

You: oh hii

You: nah its okayy not a biggie

Jeno: its the manager hyung, i told him i have to go somewhere but you know its hard to cooperate with them :/

Jeno: look i promise it will just need to b arranged real fast okay

You: okaaay i know youre busy you can really take your time tho

Jeno: so sorry ;(((

You: jeno its fine :*

You: :(

Jeno: thanjk you for the understanding ;)

Jeno: ill be there in.. 5 mins?

You: ill be here waiting!

You were smiling like crazy reading his texts. All you did was blushing and heart skipping while replying to him. He was so cute. And it's the first time you guys exchange texts. And he did it first! (how its a big deal for you)

Then there he is. Entering the cafe with a little skip and making a bee line to your table then sit down in front of you. 

"Right on time." He said jokingly. You just chuckled at him.

"Sooo what's up? What is it that you wanted to talk about in your very packed schedule, busy bee?"

He exhaled harshly before replying. "Nothing. Just wanna get out and have some fresh air."

He averted his gaze to yours before continue, "with my new friend." 

You raised one of your eyebrows at the boy. "Yeah? I thought you already forgot me because i was just simply a girl that worked at your company," you talk as you fold your hands.

"Why would i? I'll remember you anyway. You once fell in front of me when you were about to open some door and that actually was funny as hell. Shouldn't laugh but i can't help it. Oops. Should have not told you this part too..."

Your face heated in a second, and yes, you did that and it was humiliating and you felt very stupid. That time you were about to enter the conference room at the company building, but jeno (also the other members were there) was opening the door at the same time, unfortunately you stumbled on your feet and ended up kneeling at his.

He take a glance at you again then continue. "And you're pretty pretty."

You immediately looked up to him. You can't explain how his sudden confession affect you so much and leave your heart throbbing like crazy. 

Fortunately you can keep your act.

You chuckled and replied, "and what's that supposed to mean."

"I'm just saying that you're beautiful." 

He surely knows how to mess with your heart.

"And i'm getting worried that your eyes might have a problem," you laughed, more to laughing at yourself.

"No. I meant it."

You looked at him again, flustered, and he smiled when he saw you taken aback. A mischievous smile to be exact.

"Are you flirting with me?" Of course you were kidding. Asking that kind of question sounds nonchalant, even have no shame. But you had nothing to lose anyway.

"Would you accept it?" 

You blinked rapidly, your heart beating so fast in your chest, your palms were sweaty. He got you questioning yourself on how you can not fall for him even more? It's getting even deeper every minute you spend your time with him. He's dangerous. 

You were stunned for a moment. You felt like your cheeks burned, they're emitting flame. Your head short circuited for a while yet all you can think about is jeno. Jeno jeno jeno and jeno. The moment you can't hold it back from spilling, you just let it burst.

"I like you." 

Oh, you don't even care anymore about your image. The moment you spit that you felt like the most stupid, dense person alive on earth.

"I know." 

He responded in a heartbeat, and you felt fire burn a hole into you.

"You what?"

"I said i know. I noticed. And i do to."

"I'm so lost." You started to believe that you're out of your mind.

"I'm saying that i like you too."

Your pupils doesn't even falter when you stare at his face. You might just scream or gasp or even cry, but you were too stunned to speak, the way you were so calm also surprised yourself. You shake your head as you doubt your hearing and gave him a bitter smile.

"You're joking."

"Yes." 

Your eyes widen from his answer. He's such a prankster. 

"Jeno!"

He laughed. His laugh is so carefree but feels shy at the same time, that is just screaming lee jeno so much.

"So what am i supposed to say? You already heard me."

"I'm just trying to seek clarity." You narrow your eyes playfully. Now you don't even know where the confidence in you came from.

"You're my clarity." 

Now that sounds straight up came from a song lyric.

This whole time you think that you're crazy for wanting lee jeno, but here you are having a little cafe date and knowing him to have the same feeling as you are.

-

"Ah!" you squeal as your head thud against the hard surface.

"Sorry," jeno apologized as he giggled, then continue to peppering kisses down your neck.

Both of you were alone in a room at the backstage, making out like crazy before he bring you to the nearest table and pin you down. You sigh blissfully, thanking heaven every time your bodies this close, that you finally have jeno for your own and not anybody else. It's not the first time that he finally touched you, but every single one of his touches feels like the first time.

Oh, of course that didn't just happen in a night. He's been so sweet and kind to you that you mistaken his deed as something more than platonic relationship.

He bought you food. He told the manager to drop you off at your apartment at night when the schedule's over. You both go to the staff's cafeteria and eat lunch together. You offer him to go cycling together when he's off, and he did. He lent you his airpods when you lost one. You brewed his morning coffee. He called you one night and said that he's missing you. You asked him if you can do the same, texting or calling him as a normal friend would do despite both of your jobs. And that one night where he sneaked out to your apartment just to say that he wanted you.

That moment you thought everything is indeed possible. 

"Jen! Wait!"

He's currently railing you stupid at the backstage.

Now both of your hands were on the wall, legs spread open for him to easily pound you from the back. 

"Shit, this pussy's so tight." He slowed down, dragging his cock precise and keen, watching how his length appeared then disappeared inside your pussy.

"You like that baby?"

Your ears are buzzing, eyes fluttering, you only mewl and all you can hear is squelching sounds from how wet your pussy is before he sped up, skins clapping resonated all over the room.

When you didn't answered, he stopped and brings your hair to a ponytail then yanked your head up so your back is now against him as he whispered, "i said, am i fucking you good, little slut?" Well he can be cruel sometimes, but both of you know his mouth isn't that dirty on daily basis. He's just having his moment.

"Fuck yes," you finally speak.

Jeno railed into you again, he prop you to stand up, right hand on your hip, clamping so hard it'll leave bruises, and left hand grasping at your jaw to make you face him, his lips ghosting between your ear and lips, heavy breathing and all.

When he brushed against your earlobe, he whispered right onto your ear, "open your fucking mouth."

You obliged, as he bent your neck back and you presented all of yourself in front of him, he spit into your mouth. "Perfect. Keep it there like a good girl you are." 

Jeno started to pick up pace again, this time hitting your spot deliciously over and over, sending you to the cloud nine.

You agape as you moan, all while your mouth full of your and his spit, nonetheless making an effort to keep jeno's words but you're already drooling all over your chin.

"J-jen.."

"Shh, no need to say a thing baby girl, keep your pretty mouth shut."

Jeno suddenly lift you up and prop your back against the table. He's hovering over you, tapping your cheek, oblige you to open your mouth again, and spit another glob into yours.

"Now keep that warm and safe, you could do that, right angel?"

He asked and you only nodded in response. "That's it. Now let me make you feel good."

He spread your dangling legs by pushing on your thighs then dragging his hard and big cock along your slit, making a quite lubrication.

You're a whiny mess, never in your life you thought you'd have sex with lee jeno in a random room on their backstage, and he's pretty wild at the moment.

Before you can process a thing, he's already on his knee, eating you out slowly. You tug at his hair and hoist your hip up, but he's keeping you in place. He's taking his time, kitten licking at your opening with a slow pace, sucking softly at the clit, but it already making you tremble and wanting more. He's keeping the act for a while before the frustrations hit you.

"Jeno, hurry the fuck up."

He stop doing his ministrations, and as he pissed off, he suddenly lift you up again, your front pushed to the nearest wall.

"What did i just say to you? Shut your fucking mouth. Don't fucking speak. Why did you speak?"

He landed a couple of hard slap against your ass, making you yelp and shriek, "i-m sorry, please," your head drooped, your body trembling, but not from fear.

It's excitement.

Another slap on your ass. "Please what? Tell me, angel, what is it?

He kneaded your flesh and put his length between your ass cheek, nuzzling it sensually, and it made you bite your lip hard, can't take his teasing no more.

"Please," you almost sob. "Please, jeno, fuck me."

You beg, and he immediately bend you fully over again, both of his hands were on your hips as he fuck you into oblivion.

"Princess wanna get fucked. What she wants, she gets." 

He kissed his teeth before he rammed into you, hitting that sweet spot precisely over and over again it felt so good. Your hands and legs almost gave up, but he grabbed your hip in place. As you moan and scream for him, he keep chanting that he want you to come for him.

"Jeno, i'm fucking close- fuck," your hair is tangled, you're a drooling mess, your eyes rolled up. He fuck you so good it leave you dumb. Jeno's hips never once falter, he keep fucking into you rapidly as you whine non stop.

"Fuck, come all over me. Come on," he encouraged you.

"Coming!" You're a moaning mess, pussy can't help but tightened around him, making him curse under his breath. He continue to pistoning as he chasing his high, prolonged your own orgasm.

"Fuck, gonna cum," his thrust remain steady until it finally stopped, buried so deep inside you as he fill you up to the brim. Jeno finally pulled out, your hands and elbow propped against the wall as you arched your back while bending over, giving him a full sight of your ass and pussy overflowing with his cum. 

"Shit.." jeno cursed as he ran a hand through his fringe.

You felt your bodies emitting fog from the fever, glistening with sweat.

Just after that, you both heard a knock and someone's shouting.

"Are you guys done there? Jeno, get your loud ass out there right now, we're running out of time." 

You wouldn't miss whose voice it was.

It's fucking na jaemin. You felt embarrassment creep down your spine when you realized he found out, although nothing like the rest of the members doesn't know about the relationship you two have. But still, caught red handed fucking in the backstage with his band mate is a little bit..

"That's embarrassing.." you sigh while covering your face, making jeno chuckled as he patted your head.

"He'll get used to it." He smiled like a puppy, as he not merely fuck you senseless just now.

-

You said that it's embarrassing. But it seems like you're liking how unusual things did give you some thrilling sensations you can't explain. Since then, you've had sex with jeno in the void meeting room when everybody's leaving from work. It's giving you anxiety on what if someone's barge in, or the worst-you'd get kicked out from the company and never ever get the same job even at the different place again-but funnily, you can't resist the good feeling jeno made you and the realization that you were actually enjoying the shit, eventually not giving any fuck if someone know.

Another day of you and jeno spending time together in the same room, giving some different kind of affections to each other. And you're just too afraid to say something; to ask him: 'what are we?' Because you couldn't be more happy with what's happening between you two now. And tonight is a bit different because you feel your heart ache in the way he hold you as he won't let go.

"Jeno.." you arched your back when his tongue trailed from your abdomen up to your breasts while he attempted to unclasp your bra.

After freeing the flesh, he mumbled in awe, "beautiful."

He latched his tongue on your nipple, swirling it with purpose, to make you even wet just for him, and him only, just like the way he liked it.

"Fuck, it feels so good, don't stop," you pulled on his hair, a signal for him to keep going. 

"Yeah? You like that, pretty girl?" Jeno kneaded on your swell as he sucked again on your nipple.

"Louder. Moan louder for me." And that's what you did. Your fucked up sounds is a music to his ears, railing him up to the extent where he just wanted to sink in you. 

Jeno cupped your sex, your panties were damp in arousal. "Shit, look at you. So fucking wet." He slid his fingers up and down your panties before he slipped his fingers in. You whimpered when his cold digit met your folds. He only play with your opening and clit, but it already drive you crazy. You're practically drooling, he's collecting your essence on his fingers before he bring it up to his mouth, tasting your arousal. You huff and puff, look already fucked up before him when he barely did anything.

"So pretty. So fucked up. So needy for me."

All you did is fucking whine. Lee jeno is driving you insane.

"Please," you plead. "Jeno,"

"Hm? What is it princess?" He asked with a sweet mocking tone.

"Fingers. Want your fingers inside me." You sternly told him, but your gaze was infirm.

He chuckled then replied, "of course baby, you'll have it. But later. I have to taste you first. Will you let me?"

He asked for your permission and what on earth is stopping you from letting him eat you out? Of course you would never say no.

"Pleasee," your whiny voice made him smile from ear to ear in satisfaction.

"Love it when you beg."

Jeno get down to eye level with your pussy before dive in. Your hips wouldn't stop thrusting up to him and pulling his hair, his strong hands looping on your thighs. At this rate his face buried deep between you legs and tongue prod into your cunt, exploring your hole, lips trying so hard to swallow you up, open mouthed kiss at your pussy, sucking and lapping. He's eating you out like there's no tomorrow. 

"Fuck, i think i'm gonna cum."

Jeno chuckled, "already? So spoilt."

Jeno bring his fingers down and curled the digit expertly inside your pussy, you're wiggling like crazy when he reached that sweet spot that got your pussy tightening around him, then he sucked your clit hard, made you cum in instant at his doing.

You gradually came down from your high and stared at him in the eye, begging.

"Jeno, please, let me suck you off."

He feels like he's flying up the cloud seeing you prettily begged for him. Then he smiled, "can't say no to a pretty girl like you."

You bit your lip before you kneeled in front of him, taking a hand of his hard cock and kissed the tip. You hold onto his balls while you licked and sucked along his shaft until your tongue met with the tip, then sink into his cock, swallowing him whole. You bobbed your head up and down, sucking in intensity. He groaned and bring his hand through your hair, while he got his head thrown back against the headboard.

"You're doing so good baby, keep going."

He hissed painfully, his muscles clenched and his grab on your hair is getting tight. Your left hand massaging his balls, mouth sucking at the tip, the other hand stroking the rest of his shaft.

"Fuck, i'm not gonna last." He hold your head and thrust into your mouth, chasing his high. Your gagged sound heard all over the room, eyes pricked from tears. His groan went louder and that's when he came all over your mouth, and you swallowed all of his seed like a good girl, his good girl.

You lap all of his fluid, cleaning his cock clean, and lick your own lips.

"God you're pretty." His stare full with admiration, then he caged you between his arms, locked your lips with his in a passionate kiss. Tongue dancing with each other, nipping at one's lip. Both of you moan into the kiss, until he break it first.

Your back arched so high, hips pressed against his own, wanted more just than kissing him, but he pushed your belly down and leaned in.

"Need you now. Need to make love to you."

Once again, your heart sank at his confession. You're already tearing up as he pushed his big cock into you, soon picking up a steady pace to thrust between your wall, all while kissing you out. His kiss felt so soft and sweet, but also fragile at the same time. Your bodies met, no space in between. You hug him tightly, so afraid that he might just run away or disappear in the blink of an eye. He made you feel so good you're crying, can't even think or talk straight, your mind felt numb.

That night, you remembered vividly the last word he said before you passed out.

"I love you."

-

The rainy night made you feel all lazy. You wouldn't get up from bed if you just didn't feel the urge to go to the convenience store and fulfill your craving with some warm food. You're definitely starving.

You take out your umbrella because it's still raining, but as you nearly arrived, it's became a drizzle before it came to a stop.

You fold your umbrella as you walk closer, but before entering the place, you definitely saw jeno at the dark aisle between two buildings; making out with who the fuck you don't care, as if someone could've not just pass by and saw them two passionately changing spits.

You froze in your place, can't even walk any closer to where jeno was. You felt anger bubbling up to your chest and at the same time, you can't help your heart from breaking into pieces.

But as someone's controlling you, you suddenly stomped on your feet, making a way to them with balled fists, and you nearly scream when you call him out.

"Jeno."

The two broke the kiss after couple of seconds as if they're unbothered, both dripping from the drizzle. He turned at you, eyes dark and indicating that he wasn't even surprised to see you there. 

But then he opened his mouth, "how th-"

"What the fuck?" You cut him before he talk, spitting your anger out, voice all husky and spiteful, extremely vulnerable at the same time.

"Who the fuck is that?" Your eyes burned from restraining tears roll down your cheeks.

"What happened with the other days when we literally spent time together? Yesterday, you just- we just- fuck, i- i thought you just said that you lo-"

You can't help but blubbering, can't even say the last word you meant from spilling out. It's too much.

The girl he was making out with tried to walk away, but he grabbed her wrist.

You scoffed, speechless.

Did he just stop her?

Sickeningly, he just walked by you as he made a way out while dragging her with him.

You swear you just felt so fucking dumbfounded. He didn't even say a word since earlier.

When you can't hold your tears back again, you break out and scream his name out. 

"LEE JENO!"

He looked back from his shoulder, but he still put the same blank expression in front of you before he chuckled.

"Well. Looks like i've got nothing to explain since you already saw it."

Still standing with the balled fists, you can't even talk as you were trying so hard to figure things out. Why the fuck did he do this? Did this to you?

"I believe you're capable enough to think with your little brain, princess."

Suddenly, the rain started to pouring again, leaving you all soaked up gradually.

He's giving you the nastiest smile he have ever showed you as he made his getaway with the girl and said,

"Wake the fuck up. I have never loved you."

―

And that's when you wake up from your dreams.

As your eyes fluttered, you felt tears running from the corner of your eyes, making your sideburns damp uncomfortably.

This fucking whole thing is a dream. A dream that's so real.

No wonder that all of it was happening so fast; and absurd.

Now you can't even think of jeno the same way anymore if you see him at work. 

You checked your phone. Of course it's december. You laughed bitterly at yourself when you realized you trapped with jeno in your dreams when it's fucking summer. You swear you can even feel the heat. It just felt so true.

You get up on your elbows then cursed under your breath before muttered to yourself, "never thought you'd love and hurt me at the same time."

And it's not even in the real world.

Is it better because it's just a dream? Or is it not because the real thing is even more an awful truth you need to accept?

That's when you realized that the meaning of impossible is literally as it is. It's the time for you to understand that both of you is poles apart, that he is different.

You'll never ever get him, and you need to forget him; as he might already forget you.

[kateisprettyodd]

Discussing Watcher again lmao

Okay, now that a couple of days have passed and emotions aren't running high anymore - I wanna talk about the situation, the backlash, their potential response and everything else once again (with somewhat of a refreshed POV lmao).

I haven't changed my mind about this move whatsoever since the moment I heard about it. I'm an international fan, and through the very kind Tumblr user who is organizing a subscription match-up between fans through Email - I think it was @prettyghoul- someone was thankfully willing to reach out to me and share their account. So the money issue isn't a problem for me, sure, but WAIT - the website isn't international, I don't know if it's gonna be made available in my 'insignificant' Eastern European country (lmao), so a whole slew of issues arise that aren't money related (but of course, someone else would be paying, so I can't really speak on that issue on that person's behalf).

Secondly, people who are defending Watcher on here and on other social media - I understand you, I get you, but to be perfectly honest some of you are cherry-picking the information you present and are somehow blind to their intentions, either on purpose or genuinely. I don't understand how people can't see that making this move is so incredibly selfish. That's the best and frankly only way to describe it. And no, it's not because creatives don't deserve to be paid for the work that they do, and it's not because we are ENTITLED to receiving free content on YouTube (which is the main narrative being pushed by defenders on here) - but it's because their ambitions do not line up with the audience-based shows they have been creating. They have incredible creative abilities and true passion for creating shows which are "much higher-quality than other YouTube shows" (simply not true but I digress), but nothing will ever change the fact that they started on YouTube, that their main audience was cultivated on YouTube, the place they have come to despise because of the limitations to THEIR creative work, such as appealing to advertisers and whatever else they mentioned in the video. This I can understand, YouTube's algorithm sucks and advertisers are also horrible, as well as the fact that 'unappealing' yet passionate shows don't do well - this can all take a hit on their creativity and their passion for YouTube. I understand. But they have to weigh these cons against the pros, and they clearly did a horrible job of that. YouTube allows them to increase their relatability and their marketability if you play by the rules, YouTube allows them to connect with other creators WHICH SOME OF THEIR SHOWS LITERALLY depend on, YouTube allows them things like the discover page and the trending page where new audiences can find your stuff once you expand your reach to appeal to different demographics and interest groups, YouTube Membership is a thing if you need income, whatever. I understand that they don't want to play by the rules, but if your audience is gone then who are you making these shows for??? When your main venture is paid, even if it is 'only' 5.99 a month (lmao again), other options where they can make revenue immediately close up, since they can't really justify them. Why does their Patreon still exist??? What was the purpose of PodWatcher??? How are shows like Are You Scared? and Too Many Spirits going to survive on a streamer, shows which are based on that exact YouTube vibe of low-production two dudes chilling and laughing. Why are they considering their shows TV-caliber? Puppet History and Mystery Files are certainly NOT TV-quality and they are the second- and third-most popular.

Which is what brings me to my next point - how this all seems Ghost Files and Travel Season centered. No one can convince me that most of their expenses are not going to these two shows right now. Ryan said it himself, a season of Ghost Files takes hundreds of thousands of dollars to make, which is fine and I commend him for that effort. I don't even have to tell you why Travel Season also may have cost them a lot of money - which is also fine and I understand the appeal of it. But why not try a different approach? A season of Ghost Files doesn't necessarily have to come out every year, they could space out their budget, spend time churning out Too Many Spirits and Are You Scared (also shows that perform quite well), update their Patreon to look more Mythical Society-esque, do a merch drop (I have seen so many people asking for box-sets of their shows, and I can guarantee people would have paid A LOT of money to get a Puppet History karaoke thing on Patreon or WHEREVER)... Just generally diversify their income??? And space out these GIANT, extremely expensive shows, generally pace themselves and take it easy?

Now, they won't be able to expand their reach EVEN IF they bring new personalities onto the streamer. No one new will hear about them, and if they do, why would they pay for something they've never heard of before? There is no algorithm to cater to the masses which recommends their videos to new people. People who were here from the BFU days are disilluisoned and probably won't pay. They legitimately sacrificed their audience for money to fuel their creative ambitions, but their creative ambitions don't have an outlet anymore.

TO BE CONTINUED as this is too long already

[pommedepersephone]

I feel like I'm the only one in the Good Omens fandom who doesn't get the subtext behind the "aim for my mouth but shoot past my ear" quote. Do you have thoughts to share on what it means to you?

Ooooh do I. This is probably one of my favorite lines in all of Good Omens. And that is saying something because I'm one of those with an old dog-eared copy of the book AND the S1 script book, both full of underlines (don't tell Aziraphale, he'd be horrified). So, here is my unhinged passionate explanation of what that line means to me, and how I think it actually applies to multiple moments through S2, specifically moments where there is some kind of performance/deception taking place. I will try to keep this only marginally long, so I will break down the three moments I think are MOST important, and then sum it all up at the end. Ready? Here we go!

What the line means in 1941

"Aim for my mouth but shoot past my ear" clearly applies to the mechanisms of the bullet catch in S2E4, so let's start there. What does the bullet catch tell us about their relationship? First, they are always being watched. By humans (the audience) but also by their respective sides (in this case Hell). Second, they have to pretend they don’t know each other but still have ways to communicate throughout their charade. Third, they HAVE to trust one another. Like, a LOT because - Fourth, their relationship puts them both in danger.

In this context, the line is really interesting because the idea of aiming for the mouth and shooting past the ear can also be interpreted as speaking and acting in ways that either pacify or confuse those watching, but that clearly communicate to one another. There is SOMETHING about the fact that in the presence of the Nazis Crowley speaks very plainly but in a way only Aziraphale would REALLY understand - “If the bomb does land here, it would take a real miracle for my friend and I to survive it” - yet when they are being watched unaware the line that the Nazis manage to get is “banana, fish, gorilla, shoelace with dash of nutmeg” because never, not even alone, do they speak in a completely straightforward manner. This does not mean they do not communicate, it means they communicate in their own language.

What the line means in Job

But wait! There is MORE! Because 1941 isn’t the first time we’ve seen these two perform for an audience! "Aim for my mouth but shoot past my ear" also applies in Job. There is one big difference - at the start of the story, Crawley is performing alone. He is saying all the right demonic things - "I want to. I long to destroy the blameless children of blameless Job, just as I destroyed his blameless goats." And at first, Aziraphale is in the audience, unaware of the sleight of hand taking place in front of him. But Crawley offers to read him in by showing him… the crows. And Aziraphale ends up stepping into the roll of magician’s assistant as Crawley works to save Job’s kids, human and otherwise.

What I find interesting is the way you can think about mouths and ears here - Crawley lets him hear the crows bleat (shoot past my ear) which lets Aziraphale understand who Crawley really is. Then Crawley offers him the ox rib (aim for my mouth) which in some ways makes Aziraphale begin to actually examine who HE is. Both are necessary if they are going to eventually become An Us, and it really starts here, with Job.

What the line means in the Final Fifteen

By the time we get to present-day S2 “Aim for my mouth but shoot past my ear” has taken on such a deep meaning for these two man-shaped beings. Their communication is so rich and layered, where they speak in metaphors and puns and have rituals like the I Was Wrong dance. I mean, just look at this silly little act of love -

I. Simply. Cannot. These two! They deeply enjoy one another. BUT this very complicated language they have developed together only works when they are ON THE SAME PAGE.

What happens in the Final Fifteen? They stop speaking the same language. For the sake of this analysis, we are assuming that Aziraphale is feeling threatened, and is aware that Metatron has ill intent, okay? Okay. In that context… just like 1941, they are AGAIN being watched (this time by Heaven), pretending they don’t know certain things about each other, need to trust each other and their relationship has put them in danger. But here is the kicker - they have slipped back into their roles from the start of Job, except reversed. They don’t have the same information and awareness. Fell the Marvelous is desperately putting on the performance of his life, and Crowley doesn’t even know they are on stage. There was no time for a backroom conversation to discuss the finer points of the trick. In the end, Crowley decides “fuck shooting past your ear, you aren’t hearing me."

And in the MOST devastating way possible, these two aimed for the mouth and shot right past each other's ears. Ouch. OUCH.

*Clears throat, dries eyes* in summary, this little line of poetry does a heavy lift for S2. It applies to scenes where a performance/sleight of hand is taking place, but it reads differently in each one. Importantly, "Aim for my mouth but shoot past my ear" only works out when they are properly partnering not pretendy partnering. If there is information withheld, or they aren't in agreement (this applies to Edinburgh toooooo) things just implode. They have to have TRUST for this to work.

Just in case I seem even remotely normal at this point, here is the little poem I wrote after watching S2 the first time, as the brainrot started to take real hold:

aim for my mouth and shoot past my ear

tell me the lines but show me your eyes

so i learn how hearts can hide truth in lies

here beside you

aim for my mouth and shoot past my ear

i promise to burn you if you hold the match

you walk through fire but i'll turn to ash

a shade grey for you

aim for my mouth and shoot past my ear

show me the words i can't seem to hear

give me something to hold as i go through my fear

and here return to you

[neobubz]

Tension Release (M) Chapter 3 - Baby Steps

sorry for the long wait i wanted this to be as juicy as can be. it’s a little on the shorter side but trust me it gets the job done *wink wink*

Prologue || Chapter 1 || Chapter 2

Word Count: approx. 7.3k Pairing: fem reader jeno || fem reader x husband Warning(s): mature audiences only, 18+, explicit language, slow-paced, storytelling, cheating, infidelity, smut, sex, oral (fem receiving), grinding, unprotected sex, consensual relations Preview: “So she’s doing okay right now?” “She just got into the tub right before you came home.” Hearing Jeno say tub Matthew sits up straight eyes on high alert. “What do you mean the tub? Did…did you see…her?!” His face starts to slowly go from friendly to furious. “I just drew the bath water and helped her to the bathroom. I didn’t see anything,” Jeno lies. “She would have kicked me out anyway. The moment she mentioned wanting to take a bath she said ‘and no funny ideas Mr!’ She’s safe with me, Matthew. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt her or bring harm to her.” “To be honest I wasn’t and I’m still not thrilled about this whole thing. When she wanted you to take care of her it felt like she was punishing me. Today has been one of the hardest days of my life.” Remembering what you asked of him, Jeno takes another sip of his soda before proceeding. Fighting the urge to just roll his eyes and listen to Matthew’s pitty party he puts his big boy pants on and asks the one question you wanted to know.

✞ＴＥＮＳＩＯＮ ＲＥＬＥＡＳＥ✞

Sweat trails down the side of your face. Your hair sticks to the back of your neck while your head swings around like a bobble head. Legs spread open, clothes tossed to the ground; Jeno rubs over your pulsing clit while he drives his cock deep into your soaking wet cunt. Not able to speak let alone breathe your mouth hangs open, drool dripping down to your chin.

“Feel good, baby?” Jeno grunts. Doing your best to nod and confirm he stares at you a smirk permanently etched onto his gorgeous face. “What’s wrong? Too fucked out to speak?”

Again you nod. How you got here is still a complete blur to you. The last thing you remember before feeling Jeno slide his massive cock into your tight pussy is him declaring he wanted to fuck you. The kissing, rubbing and fingering of your cunt that followed after is all foggy.

The only memory you’re clear on is Jeno grabbing the pillows to protect your back before sliding ever so gently into you — both of you groaning at the extremely snug fit.

“Gosh your pussy is so tight.” Jeno leans forward onto his arms giving you a beautiful view of his lean muscles. “How the fuck are you married and your pussy is still this tight?” He growls while slamming his pelvis into yours the force ricocheting through your entire body.

At first Jeno went slow, easing his cock into you. It took a good five minutes until he could slide in past the hilt. When he stated he wanted to give you a good fucking before Matthew came home you figured a pretty basic vanilla scenario. His lips trailing down your body lovingly, the sweet gazes you two would share when he massages your breasts in his palms. All of this leading up to him entering you – moans filling the room as you both reach your climaxes.

Instead what you got was a deep hard fuck. Kindly, Jeno gave you enough time to adjust to his size, rocking his hips into yours gently. As time passed his thrusts grew stronger. The look in his eyes darker and when you begged him to fuck you harder — he delivered, and then some.

“F-Feels good!” You croak out as another powerful thrust takes your breath away.

“Been awhile since someone was this deep in your pussy, huh?” He snickers.

Holding onto his forearms your eyes pop open wide when a particular thrust rubs you just the right way.

“Aga…in!!” You try to shout but the intensity of his cock slamming into you makes it hard for you to speak.

“What was that baby?” Once again Jeno angles his hips and drives himself balls deep inside of you.

“Fuck! There!” You scream.

With a devilish smirk Jeno slams into you again and again. Eyes rolling into the back of your head, your arms that were barely keeping you up slowly start to slide down onto the quilt until your back is pressed firmly against it. Voice hoarse from moaning you clench around Jeno’s cock when he hits your g-spot again.

“Shit!” Jeno curses.

“Don’t…stop…” you reach up to him. “Please don’t stop!”

Leaning down into your arms, Jeno curls his hips into yours. Wrapping your arms around him you cling to him for dear life. Smacking into you again and again he builds up the most powerful orgasm you’ve ever had. Screaming into the crook of his neck your walls clench around him. Nails digging into Jeno’s back you leave behind mark after mark of your presence on his skin.

“I’m gonna…I’m gonna…” you start chanting.

Growling, Jeno bites down onto your shoulder, his own climax charging forward. “Fuck!!” He pulls away to crash his lips onto yours. “Come for me baby,” he bites your bottom lip. “Come all over my cock.”

“Jeno!!!” You cry out your body burning in the flames of passion.

Your walls constrict around Jeno’s massive length. Long gone is the feeling of guilt for having kissed Jeno yesterday. Gone is the uncertainty of the conversation you had with Roz last night about your possible feelings for Jeno. And for certain, long gone is any thought of your husband. The only thought is reaching your climax and soaking Jeno’s cock in your juices.

Toes curling, and body quaking your breathing becomes ragged. A long forgotten pressure building in your lower stomach has your breath hitching in the back of your throat. Eyes rolling into the back of your head your arms scramble to wrap around Jeno’s shoulders when one final thrust sends you over the edge.

“FUCK!!!” You scream.

“Shit! Shit!!” Jeno tries to maintain his pace while you push against his cock — soaking him in your juices. “Ahhh fuck!” He roars.

Hips still slamming into yours Jeno presses his body down onto you when he feels you starting to twist around from your climax. Trying to keep you from hurting yourself more he slows his pace as you ride out your orgasm.

“I can’t wait until your back is better.” He starts to chuckle but grunts trying to hold out for a little longer.

“What…makes you…” you try to speak but your body quivers beneath him. “Think…there’ll be a second time?” You ask cheekily.

Raising himself up Jeno gazes down at you. Eyes dark with lust, lips swollen from the intensity of your kisses. Hair drenched in sweat, the most alluring look comes to his face. Half cocky as if saying ‘the way you just came on my dick is proof enough you’ll be back,’ the other filled with hope that this won’t be just a one-time thing.

“Like I said before,” he thrusts his cock deep inside of you, taking your breath away once more. “Everything,” he slams into you again. “Is up,” he pulls out farther this time making you whimper. “To you...”

Slamming down into you as if he’s going to destroy your cunt your body curls under him. There is no way in hell you’ll ever be able to go back to how things were. The temptation far too grand to say no.

Speeding up again he drills himself inside you like a piston. No longer worried about getting you off, Jeno thinks of his release and his release only. Your nails drag across his back more as he uses you as his personal fuck doll.

“I’m gonna…” Jeno grunts. “Fuck! Your pussy feels so good.”

“Come inside me,” you whimper beneath him.

“Wh-What?!” Jeno stumbles in his rhythm but quickly finds it again.

“I’m on birth control. It’s fine.”

“Are you sure?” He grunts as the feeling to fill you up to the brim draws closer.

“Yes!” You nibble on his ear. “Fill me up with your come.”

With the most powerful thrusts of his hips so far, Jeno slams into you. Drilling his cock deep inside of you the rhythm he had set becomes erratic. His breathing increases, his skin turning a bright pink. His hair sticks to his forehead as sweat drips down onto your skin.

“Shit!!! F-Fuck! I’m going to…Ahhhh fuck!” He slams hard into you painting your inner walls white with his come.

Clenching around him you milk him of every last drop. He sputters, hips moving slowly releasing ever last bit of his come inside of you. Eyes rolling into the back of his head he collapses into your arms, taking a moment to collect himself.

Giggling you kiss Jeno repeatedly on his cheek. Your hand wrapping around his neck, running through his sweat drenched hair your pussy pulsating around him.

“There will be a second time,” you whisper. Scoffing Jeno goes to move off of you. “No! Not yet!”

“It was that good?” He snickers.

“Fantastic!”

“I didn’t hurt you did I?”

“No, but I’m sure I’ll have trouble walking tomorrow. Not like I wasn’t expecting that already.”

Lifting himself up to look you in the eyes, Jeno places a kiss on your forehead, nose, and then your cheek. “I’ll be sure to work out any soreness you have tomorrow.”

Smiling up at him lovingly a giggle leaves you. “Thank you, Jeno.”

Holding back a laugh he raises a brow. “Are you seriously thanking me for what did you say again… ‘fucking you into the mattress?’”

“Yes!” You laugh. “I’m thanking you for fucking me into the mattress, but also…for being nice to me. I know this isn’t the most ideal situation and if it was different maybe we could actually be togeth —”

Quickly stopping you with a kiss, Jeno shakes his head. “Let’s not go there, okay?”

“But I feel bad…”

“Don’t feel bad at all. I’m choosing to do this. Trust me… I just had the best fuck of my life. It only makes me hope I didn’t do too much damage to you that it’ll prolong your stay here.”

“Why? You want to fuck me outside of my house?”

Nipping your neck Jeno whispers against your ear. “Yes I do actually. Anywhere and everywhere we possibly can.”

Opening the fridge Jeno gets out a can of Cola like you requested. Upstairs soaking in nice warm bath you wait for his return. Having stated you needed to get the smell of sex off of you so Matthew doesn’t notice. Licking his lips he smiles at the taste of your sweet cunt that still lingers. After all this time, after all the years of hearing story after story and seeing picture after picture of you he not only had the chance to meet you, but to taste and fuck you. All those years falling for someone he thought he’d never meet, yet here you are upstairs hoping a warm bath will relieve your aching muscles that got twisted up because of him.

And, like a fool he’s starting to fall for you especially after the mind blowing sex you just had. Walking a thin line already he pours some soda for you as well as himself in two glasses.

“What the fuck have you gotten yourself into?” He asks himself.

Just then the front door opens alarming him. “Hello? Sweetheart! Jeno?!” Your husband calls out.

“Great…” Jeno rolls his eyes. “Uhh…Matthew?” He calls already dreading the hopefully small conversation he’ll have with your husband before taking his leave.

Footsteps sound behind him and with one final deep breath, Jeno puts on his biggest and most innocent smile. “Ah! Jeno! There you are!” Matthew grins.

“Hi, how was your morning?”

“The service went on without a hitch, though everyone missed their beautiful greeter today. They send their wishes and prayers for a speedy recovery.”

“That’s awfully nice of everyone.”

“Yeah, the people in this town are amazing once you get to know them. We care for each other and worry about each other. It’s like one huge family here. Today I think it hit everyone at how much she does. I know she doesn’t think she does much but a friendly smile and talking to our patrons is a job only she can do. She makes everyone feel at home in the church. She’s an amazing woman. It felt weird not having her there today. Even I’ve grown used to her being around,” he chuckles taking a seat at the small table you two have in your kitchen.

“And the picnic?”

“I hated every second of it,” Matthew runs a hand through his curly brown locks. “It was super awkward. You would think after all these years I’d be able to hold conversations with people like I am with you but it was difficult. Normally I hang around our families and when my mom gives me the look, I make my rounds making sure everyone is okay, but holding conversations well, that’s my wife’s specialty. I didn’t realize how much she leads them.” Motioning towards the chair Matthew smiles, “please sit.”

Nodding Jeno joins him. “Sometimes it takes an absence in order for us to recognize what we had beforehand.”

“You’re absolutely right. She’s truly the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”

Feeling like he’s just been stabbed in the gut Jeno chugs down some of his drink.

“Oh, like my wife requested,” Matthew continues. “Here is some food for you.” He slides a bag over to Jeno. “And I made sure to grab two slices of her mom’s apple pie. Trust me you’re going to like it. I suggest having the second slice with some ice cream.”

“Thank you…” Jeno marvels at Matthew’s kindness. “You really didn’t need to go through all this extra trouble.”

“Nonsense. My wife requested it, plus, you need to eat too. Speaking of my wife, how is she?”

“Well, this morning she was a little miffed. She didn’t really talk much but after some breakfast she seemed to cheer up.”

Nodding, Matthew slides down in his chair. “That is probably my fault. We got into a heated argument and I left without telling her.”

“She said.”

Glancing up Matthew eyes Jeno closely, “she told you what happened?”

“Not in so many words. However she was confused to see me outside the door when she came out of the bathroom. She just said you could have told her you left already.”

“I’m a jerk aren’t I?” Matthew lowers his head to the table.

“I wouldn’t say that. Couples fight. It’s natural.”

“Yes, but what man leaves his wife who can’t walk stuck in the bathroom?”

“She wasn’t alone,” Jeno tries to make him feel better about the situation. “I got her in bed safely and she ate a hearty breakfast. She’s perfectly fine. There’s nothing to feel guilty about.” He lies.

Honestly, what he wants to tell Matthew is that he’s a mega asshole. What man does leave his wife who can’t walk right in the bathroom hoping that the person who’s hired to help her will just pick up where he left off! He should have saw that you were in bed safely. The congregation could have waited a few minutes before starting. It’s not like there was anywhere to go and with what Roz has told Jeno about this town – your whereabouts and condition were probably known by now, they would have understood.

Not to mention, what husband leaves his wife without making sure she’s fed. You can’t get to the bathroom right outside of the room you’re staying in without help. How did he expect you to eat? Just because the two of you had a fight does not give him the right to leave you the way he did.

Inhaling slowly, Jeno takes another sip of the cold beverage to calm him down before he says something he’ll surely regret.

“I wish I could believe you but this whole mess is my fault. If I had been a better husband she wouldn’t have been so angry and she wouldn’t have worked herself so hard.”

“Don’t give yourself so much credit. She told me she was angry at me and that’s one reason she was working herself to death.”

“Angry at you? Why?”

“Well, I mean…” fuck…Jeno groans internally. The last thing he wanted was to discuss anything that happens between you and him to your husband. Just had to open your mouth didn’t you? He asks himself.

“I kind of ran away from her,” he says honestly. “I’m not used to having such close contact with women. I mean no one outside of the family that is. I was always at the gym and at practice trying to get ready for drafts but then everything changed when I got injured. I kept myself locked away inside my house until I couldn’t take it anymore and came here. Your wife welcomed me with open arms, literally.” Jeno chuckles. “It was a lot to take in all at once. Getting used to a new country, a new town, new people, and new ways of expression. So…I ran...”

Matthew throws his head back laughing. “Oh my! I can already see her face. One thing you need to know and always remember about her is when she’s mad don’t press. She might be sweet and kind but when she’s angry she can make a grown man cry.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.”

“So she’s doing okay right now?”

“She just got into the tub right before you came home.”

Hearing Jeno say tub Matthew sits up straight eyes on full alert. “What do you mean the tub? Did…did…did you see…her?!” His face starts to go from friendly to furious.

“I just drew the bath water and helped her to the bathroom. I didn’t see anything,” Jeno lies. “She would have kicked me out anyway. The moment she mentioned wanting to take a bath she said ‘no funny ideas Mr!’ She’s safe with me, Matthew. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt her or bring harm to her.”

“To be honest I wasn’t and I’m still not thrilled about this whole thing. When she wanted you to take care of her it felt like she was punishing me. Today has been one of the hardest days of my life.”

Remembering what you asked of him, Jeno takes another sip of his soda before proceeding. Fighting the urge to just roll his eyes in regards to Matthew’s pitty party he puts his big boy pants on and asks the one question you wanted to know.

“If you don’t mind me asking, what’s been going on? Man to man.”

Glancing up Matthew doesn’t say a word. He just stares at Jeno looking him over. Lips in a hard line, eyes distant and lost — even though Jeno doesn’t care at all about the reason behind whatever is going on between you and Matthew the look on your husbands face tells him this goes much deeper than even you could fathom. Whatever is going on with him he’s sure not even Matthew knows the real reason.

“What do you mean?” Matthew asks but each word is crisp as if saying how the hell do you know?

“Your wife mentioned that things have been a little tense. She kind of talks a lot when getting a massage. I wasn’t going to bring it up but I’m worried it’s affecting her overall health. Any pent of stress can wreak havoc on one’s body. I just want to make sure that everything is okay and if possible maybe I can help with whatever is going on between the two of you. That is only if you’re okay with it.”

Speaking half-truth and half lies, Jeno keeps his composure calm and welcoming. Hoping that Matthew will reveal a little snippet of what is going on with him. Truthfully, if he finds anything out he has no intention of telling you – just like he has no intention of telling Matthew everything that the two of you discuss.

“I’m not sure what’s going on with me.” Matthew exhales. “I’ve been telling her its stress which it is, but there’s something else that’s wrong with me. I feel broken.”

“Broken?”

“Do you think she’s beautiful?”

Jeno gulps nervously. “Wh-What?”  

“My wife, do you think she’s beautiful?”

“We-Well I mean…” Chuckling he turns away his heart racing. Yes, she’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen you dumb piece of shi – “Matthew I can’t answer this question…”

“Yes you can. It’s okay if you find her beautiful. I won’t be upset.”

Waving him off Jeno snickers. “And if I did say she is beautiful you’d chew my ass out for saying she was. No sir, not falling into that trap.”

“It’s not a trap. I’m being serious. Do you think she’s beautiful?”

Avoiding all eye contact with your husband Jeno shrugs. “Well, I mean she’s not ugly if that’s what you’re asking.”

“She’s the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met. Even when we were still in school she was beautiful. She has this softness and warmness about her that, I don’t know how to put it — she settled my soul. I’ve always been the nerd, the dork, the church boy, the freak, but she never cared. She always treated me with kindness and respect.

“When I finally got the nerve to ask her out after our Bible study class, I thought I was dreaming when she said yes. Then, when she said yes to marrying me, I almost passed out. She is the very air I breathe. Yet…” his voice starts to fade and he becomes quiet as a mouse.

“Yet?”

“I feel broken. The physical neediness isn’t there at all. I’ve never felt this way. I’ve always been conservative, yes, but this feeling…I don’t know what it is. I’m beyond attracted to her. I have I have no problem getting ready, if you know what I mean. It’s just the very idea of having relations with her makes me feel dirty. I worship the very ground she walks on, still…”

“Maybe that’s the problem,” Jeno interjects.

“What do you mean?”

“You’re treating her like some kind of goddess instead of as your wife. Don’t get me wrong a man should treat his woman like a queen but there are some moments where she doesn’t want a king, or a prince, or a knight in shining armor. She wants that rapscallion who teases, taunts, chases, desires, and messes around with her. Who treats her…how do I put this nicely…?”

Gulping Matthew leans in whispering, “like a trollope?” He asks face red as a tomato.

Chuckling Jeno nods, “I was going to say whore but trollope works well in this scenario too.”

“I could never!” Matthew leans back in his seat. “She…she…”

“Is a woman with needs. Have you asked her what all she wants to do with you sexually? Have you talked about what you want to do with her sexually? Yes, you’re a pastor but you’re still a man just like the rest of us. You can still be a man of God while having the best sex of your life with your wife.”

Thinking on what Jeno states about what he wants in your sexual life Matthew leans back in his seat. His eyes brows knitted together, lips in a deep frown while he mumbles, “what do I want?”

“Yes, what is it that you want? Do you want to have a picture perfect life from the outside while it’s being torn apart by indifference on the inside or do you want something else?”

“I…I…”

“Jeno!!!” Both you and your husband jump at the sound of your voice. “Jeno?! Did I hear the door open?”

Rushing out of his seat Matthew runs to the bottom of the steps. “Sweetheart, it was me. Do you need help?”

“Uhh, yes please.”

“I’ll be right up.”

Figuring this is his cue to leave Jeno rises from the chair, grabs the doggie bag Matthew brought for him and heads out to the living room. Doing as you wished he talked to Matthew and hopefully will get some kind of balling rolling. Though in the deepest part of his heart he hopes it’s in his favor.

“Jeno,” Matthew whispers seeing Jeno ready to leave.

“No worries, I’m off.”

“About what I was saying,” Matthew wobbles back and forth. “Please, keep this between us.”

“Of course, I will,” Jeno smiles. “Plus, who would I tell anyway? I’m the new guy.” He chuckles. “Tell her I said bye and I hope the bath helped her. Tomorrow I was thinking of giving her a proper massage. There’s this new technique I’ve read about that’s supposed to get down into the muscles themselves better than just glossing over them aimlessly.”

“Will it hurt her?”

Rubbing the back of his neck Jeno shrugs. “If I do it right it shouldn’t hurt at all but feel relaxing and loosen up her muscles enough to have her moving around. We need to get her up and out of bed.”

“Oh, okay. I will.” Jeno turns to the door when Matthew stops him. “Jeno,” he calls out to him. “Thank you, for everything you’ve done for us. We barely know you and yet…”

Shaking his head Jeno smiles softly. “Your wife’s family to Roz which means she’s family to me too. Family helps each other out when they’re in need. Also, if you ever need someone to talk to you know, man to man, I’m here to lend an ear too. Your wife’s told me how hard it is around here. People treating her less like a person because they’re afraid of what she’ll think of them. I can’t imagine how someone in your position feels.

“Yes, you’re they’re to relieve them of their sins and guilt but is there someone that you can turn to when you’re in need? I hope overtime you can lean on me for this.”

Reaching in Matthew gives Jeno a quick hug. “Thank you, for everything.”

“No problem.”

Walking out the door, Jeno let’s out the biggest exhale of his life. Scoffing he kicks a rock down the street before glancing back at your house.

“I hope you’re happy…” he grumbles to your home looking up at the window to the guest room.

Sighing, he shuffles away playing everything that happened today in his head again and again.

✞ＴＥＮＳＩＯＮ ＲＥＬＥＡＳＥ✞

Struggling to stand up to put a fresh pair of underwear on, Matthew walks into the room and almost rushes back out.

“I’m sorry I didn’t —”

“Matthew,” you sigh. “It’s not like you haven’t seen me naked before.” You hold out your hand. “A little help, please.”

“O-Of…Of course!” He rushes over wrapping an arm around your waist so you can stand up.

“Thanks.”

“Jeno told me you felt like a bath would help you. Did it?”

“Well I do feel cleaner and the water did relax me until it got too cold to bear. Can you pull up my panties for me?” You ask bashfully.

This is one sentence you never thought you’d say to your husband. Well, at least not for a long time when you’re in an old folks home together.

Bending down, Matthew’s eyes glance at your puffy beautiful outer folds. Quickly averting his gaze he lowers himself to his haunches grabbing the elastic of your underwear. Just as he was about to pull them up, Jeno’s words fill his mind.

‘“You’re treating her like some kind of goddess instead of as your wife. Don’t get me wrong a man should treat his woman like a queen but there are some moments where she doesn’t want a king, or a prince, or a knight in shining armor. She wants that rapscallion who teases, taunts, chases, desires, and messes around with her. Who treats her…how do I put this nicely…?”

Gulping Matthew leans in whispering, “like a trollope?” He asks.

Chuckling Jeno nods, “I was going to say whore but trollope works well in this scenario too.”’

Gulping, Matthew once again looks at your nether region, his mind racing wondering if what Jeno said is true. He wouldn’t lie to him, right? Jeno is a trustworthy upstanding man. He said it himself that you’re family to him. Family would never hurt family!

“Sweetheart,” Matthew whispers.

“Yes?”

“Can you sit back down on the bed for me?”

“Matthew you just helped me to stand up, what do you mean sit back on the — AHHHHH!!!”

A loud moan comes from deep in your throat. Something wet and soft wiggling it’s way past your outer lips to your clit. Looking down, Matthew’s hands grip your thighs, his face bright red with a look in his eyes you haven’t seen at all, lust.

“Sit back for me, okay?” He whispers.

“Math-Matthew! What are you doing?!” You tremble your body sprinkled in goosebumps.

“I want to do something for you that I should have done a long time ago.”

“N-Now?!” You shriek.

“Please, before I lose my nerve to do it,” he begs.

“O-Okay…”

Holding onto his shoulders you do your best to sit down without hurting your back. Honestly, after the incredible fuck that Jeno gave you, your muscles are feeling better and screaming for dear life at the same time. Why did it have to be today of all days for Matthew decided to gain some courage and do this is for you?

Sitting down on the bed, Matthew grabs hold of your legs. “Lean back I don’t want you to hurt yourself.”

“Matthew really is this —”

Pulling you closer to him, Matthew reaches up placing a single kiss on your lips. “I want to make my wife feel better,” he mumbles against your lips. “I also want to apologize for being a jerk to you this morning. I shouldn’t have left without telling you. I’m sorry I let my frustration get the best of me.”

“Babe, really,” your heart breaks a little. “I’m not mad, okay?”

“I want to show you that there is no toy out there that can please you like I can.” His face starts to turn an even brighter pink the more he talks.

Holding back a giggle you do as instructed. With Matthew’s assistance your back comfortably rests on the mattress. “I didn’t really mean that I was going to get a toy, Matthew.”

“Thou shalt not lie,” he quirks a brow at you. “We both know who would have gotten one for you.”

Giggling you hide your face. “Only if I told her.”

“Don’t ever tell her,” Matthew lowers himself to your pussy again. “Let me be the one to take care of my wife.”

Biting your bottom lip a wave of guilt starts to creep over you. ‘Let me be the one to take care of my wife.’ If only he had said this before your tryst with Jeno. If only he didn’t push you away time and time again the incredibly mind blowing fuck Jeno gave you would have never happened. But of course like your father always says ‘if ifs and ands were pots and pans the world would be a kitchen and we’d all be chefs.’ You can’t change the past. What’s done is done.

Spreading your legs for him to sit comfortably between them, Matthew places gentle kisses on your inner thighs. Your body despite feeling guilty once again starts to come alive at the feeling of his lips getting closer and closer to your waiting core. It’s crazy! Jeno fucked the very life out of you, and yet here you are ready for another round. Is this what every other person experiences? To have someone desire you and want you that they — if it were one single person, can go for multiple rounds?

Placing a single kiss at the top of your mound Matthew sticks out his tongue, presses against your outer lips and just like when you were standing his tongue slides between your puffy outer folds and up against your clit. Soft whimpers fall from your lips as he finally, after five long excruciating years tastes you.

Reaching down you run your hand through his curly locks. Pleading with him to keep going. No way in hell are you going to tell him to stop. Moving closer to you, Matthew spreads your legs wider. Adjusting slightly you sit up on your arms just as you did when Jeno was pounding into you.

“D-Does it feel good?” Matthew asks.

“Yes, baby, it does. Please don’t stop.”

Growing bolder, Matthew spreads your pussy lips apart focusing on your clit. Swirling his tongue around with knowledge you didn’t know he possessed he has you falling back onto your back, the feeling far too good to withstand.

“Shit~” you purr. “Yes, baby!!”

Feeling him smile against you, Matthew suckles on your clit as if it were your breasts. Heat spreads across your skin quickly. Your breathing becomes ragged. Pulling away with a slight tug of your clit, he starts focusing everywhere he can. Kissing your outer lips, sliding his tongue from your entrance to your sensitive nub. Sucking, slurping, going to town on your soaking cunt like it’s his mother fucking job!

Grabbing hold of your breasts you start massaging them, pinching and twisting your nipples. Crying out like a wanton whore, you could care less if anyone hears your cries. This is a moment that is long overdue.

“You taste…good…” Matthew chuckles.

“I’d sure hope so…”

“I, umm, I like this…” he admits licking a stripe from your entrance to your pulsating nub.

“You do?” Your question comes out in a moan.

Humming against your clit Matthew goes back to suckling on it. The familiar pressure of your orgasm starting to build. Sliding your fingers through Matthew’s hair you grip a chunk of it keeping his head in place.

“Keep going, baby…”

Matthew grips your hips and dives deeper into your soaking cunt. A low groan emitting from you the moment he slurps your already leaking cunt. Trembles rack through you like an earthquake.

“More! More!” You cry out. “Fuck, Matthew!!!” You scream.

His tongue goes wild from your entrance to your clit and the unholy noises he’s making has you going over the edge in such a powerful orgasm you start lifting your hips from the bed despite your sore back.

“Yes!!! There!!! There!!! FUCK I’M COMING!!!” You shout.

Swiftly Matthew wraps his arms around you the moment you start jerking around. Holding you still he lapse up your slick. Toes curling you continue to moan but your voice becomes hoarse. Intense gasps burn your lungs as the best orgasm of your life starts to dissipate.

“Gentle, baby…” you giggle still feeling Matthew’s tongue on your pulsating clit.

Giving your swollen nub a few more licks and a kiss Matthew sits up his face glistening with your slick covering his lips and chin.

“Kiss me! Kiss me!” You plead. Just when Matthew is about to wipe your wetness from him you shout for him to stop. “Just come here baby,” you hold out your arms.

Matthew gets up from the floor and crawls on top of you, his arms holding him above you. Grabbing him by the neck you yank him down your tongue lapping up all of your juices from his face. Cleaning him off you relish in the taste of your wetness on him.

Slamming your lips against his, Matthew almost collapses on top of you. Your mouth moves across his hungrily. Never before have you felt so attracted to him than right now. The fact that he actually ate you out and it was heavenly hopefully means that you’ll be able to get a far better fucking from him.

Your tongue slides into his mouth, a grunt emitting from his throat. Placing more of his weight on you, your arms wrap around him. There was no need to fight for dominance with the kiss, you have Matthew wrapped around your finger. His breathing ragged, heartbeat going crazy underneath your palm around his neck — there is also the clear boner he’s sporting rubbing against you. With just a bit more time you know you can have him coming undone in more ways than one.

“Matthew,” you whisper against his lips.

“Hmmm?” He moans.

“Get on your back, okay?”

Pulling away from you he stares down face bright red with pink swollen lips. Eyeing you suspiciously you give him a nod to do as you say. Rolling over onto his back you bravely roll onto your side only feeling the slightest twinge of your back.

“Take off your clothes,” you instruct.

“WHAT?!” His eyes fly open.

“Don’t worry baby,” you press a gentle kiss on his cheek. “We’re not going to have sex.”

His eyes soften quickly but in the back of those beautiful baby blues of his you see the smallest sign of disappointment. Listening to what Matthew wants you’re not going to push him into having sex with you. Yes, you’re a desperate whore right now who wants to be fucked brainless just like earlier with Jeno, but whatever Matthew is going through, he needs to figure that out on his own.

“Wh-Why do I need to take off my clothes?”

“Do you want your nice church clothes to get sullied with both of our come?”

“WHAT?!” He shouts.

“Trust me, Matthew. Okay?”

Gulping deeply he stares at you weighing his odds. What you have in mind will hopefully give Matthew encouragement to figure out what’s going on with him a lot sooner than expected.

Sighing, he unbuckles his belt, unzips his pants and slides them off his body. Your bottom lip gets snagged by your teeth as his massive boner comes into view. Fighting the urge to reach out and touch him, you watch him submit to your demand.

Sitting up, Matthew starts to unbutton his button down shirt before discarding it onto the floor with his pants. Glancing your way you urge him to continue. Closing his eyes he takes off his tank, socks, and somehow either through pure curiosity, guilt, lust — whatever it may be, he pulls down his briefs, his cock on full display and in desperate need of attention.

“Spit on your palm,” you tell him.

“Eh?!”

“What?” You giggle. “We need you nice and slicked up for me.”

“Y-You want me to…to…”

“Touch yourself?” You ask and he nods. “Just for a bit. I would love to suck you off but that will have to wait when my back feels better and when you actually want me to touch you. I’m not in the mood to be pushed away again.”

“About that I —”

Cutting him off with a kiss you smile gently. “I told you I would wait for whatever is going on with you to end, but right now…after what you did for me; I need to return the favor to you. So, please, get that massive cock of yours nice and wet for me, will you?” You peck him on the lips.

Startled by the redness of Matthew’s face you’re two seconds from rolling over to grab your phone in case he passes out. His ears, cheeks, neck, and chest all bright red. Yet…he brings his hand up to his mouth, lets his saliva drip into his palm and with creased brows he wraps his hand around his cock.

“Ahhhhh!!!” He involuntarily moans.

This time it’s you who gulps loudly. Though he’s just started, watching Matthew slide his hand up and down his length is quite… sexy…

“H-How long?!” Matthew whimpers.

Snapping back to reality, you turn your gaze to his eyes. Huge mistake. His eyes are glazed over, bottom lip being snarled by his teeth as his heavy breaths and moans fill the room.

WHO THE FUCK IS THIS MAN?!

“A-A little longer.”

Still being a good boy, Matthew continues to stroke his cock. Your heart pounds in your chest. Almost ready to explode as his hips buck up into his palm.

“O-Okay…” you place a hand on his chest. “Move your hand sweetie.”

With one final stroke, Matthew removes his hand from his cock and you not so swiftly clamber on top of him, straddling his lap.

“Babe!!” Matthew holds onto your waist. “Your back!”

Wincing in discomfort you shake your head. “I’m good, don’t worry.”

“No you’re not. Whatever you were thinking sto— Ahhhhhh!!!”

With a small grind of your hip into his, Matthew quickly stops talking, his grip on your waist tightening.

“Since you’re not ready to fuck me, I figured this would hopefully help you see how much I want you,” you lower yourself on top of him. “How much I need you,” you kiss him gently.

“Mmmmm!!!” He whimpers against your lips as you slowly move your swollen clit against his cock.

“Shit…” you whisper against his lips. “This shouldn’t feel so good,” you chuckle.

Wrapping his arms around you, Matthew holds you steady in his arms. Moving your hips against him slowly you lull him into your own lustful bliss. Squelching sounds of your pussy on his dick mix with the soft moans coming from both of you. Though this is supposed to be about Matthew’s release, you’re definitely working yourself up into another orgasm too.

Gripping your hips, Matthew urges you to move against him faster. Glancing down his eyes tightly closed you test out your theory and move against him roughly. His breath hitches, nails dig into your skin but the soft moans coming from him give you courage to keep going.

“Does this feel good, baby?” You ask.

“Ahhhh huhhhh!” He moans.

“Do you like the feeling of my clit rubbing against you?” Nodding he gnaws on his bottom lip. Still clenching his eyes tightly you grind your hips on top of his harder. His hips bucking up to meet making you squeak. “Tell me baby, do you like my clit against your cock?”

“YES!” Matthew shouts. “Feels so good! Don’t stop!”

Leaning forward you rest your body on top of his, his arms wrapping around your waist keeping you steady while he thrusts his hard dick against your soaking folds. Pressing your lips against his your moans become muffled.

“Your cock feels so good, sweetie.” You mutter against his lips. “I can’t wait to feel you deep inside of me.”

“Ahhhhhh!!!!” Matthew holds you tighter in his arms.

“I want to feel you push me into the mattress as I look into your beautiful eyes,” you bite his bottom lip. Moving faster than you’ve ever felt him, Matthew rubs his cock against you. Your stomach churning quickly gearing for another powerful orgasm. “I want you to take me from behind too,” you giggle.

“Wh-What?” He gasps for air.

“I want to be pressed against the mattress as you drill into me. Your hips slamming against my ass.”

“Babe!!!” He whimpers.

“But most of all,” you rest your hand against his cheek, and with this small gesture his eyes start to open slowly revealing those crystal blue eyes you love so much. “I want to ride you and see your face when I make you come.”

“Ahhhhhh!!!!!”

Burying his face into your neck both of you meet each other’s thrusts as your climaxes race to the finish line. Your freshly washed skin drenched with sweat. Matthew’s body sliding against yours as if you were each other’s personal slip and slide. The slapping sounds of your hips meeting has you chanting his name. Spewing curse word after curse word your eyes roll into the back of your head.

“I-I’m c-coming!!” You squeal. “Ah! Fuck! Matthew!!!!”

A gush of wetness spurts out of you soaking Matthew’s cock beneath you. Gliding against your swollen clit your squirt continues to come out of you. Crying out for more, Matthew reaches down between the two of you, your body lifting for his hand to rub over your clit ferociously.

“Ahhhhhh shit!!!! Yes!!!!”

More of your squirt spills out of you soaking not only Matthew but your bed underneath you. Body trembling and shivering, Matthew gently rolls you both over until he is on top of you. Your eyes clouded in lust, awe, and orgasmic bliss – he does the unimaginable and slides himself into your soaking pulsating cunt.

Your walls still sore from Jeno, wrap around his cock like a warm hug. His eyes roll into the back of his head before he moves himself in and out of you slowly, building up his release again. Gripping his forearms you stare up at Matthew in amazement. Was this all it took? Did he just need to get out of his head and focus on making love to you?

“Baby,” he growls. “I can’t…for much…longer…”

“Do it, Matthew. Come for me baby!” You reach out for him.

Curling his hips he drives his cock deeper into you. Clenching your eyes tightly this time you try your best not to alarm him of how sore and spent your pussy already is. Showering your face with kisses his hot breath mixes with your own.

“I’m going to…” he whimpers.

“Inside of me! Please! Fill me up with your come!”

“Ahhhhh!!!!” Matthew hisses as a few more thrusts of his hips has him bottoming out before pulling back and out of your pussy.

Spilling his white seed on your pussy instead of inside you the wave of ecstasy leaves you. Brows knitted together tightly, Matthew pumps out the last remaining strands of his come. Your walls clench around the absence of your husbands cock and the absence of him.

Baby steps…baby steps…baby steps…

You chant again and again forcing yourself not to cry.

Baby steps…

TO BE CONTINUED…

✞ tag list ✞ if i forgot you or if you want to be added just let me know right here and i'll add you. thanks and see you in the next part! @raquelvsblog @sfsrm-blog @matchahyuck @kikiisda1 @cheyehc 

[lonelycowgirls]

Staying Afloat aka yachtie!harry

Here we go... part one of Scarlett's story!

I can't wait for ya'll to read this and what I have in store for these characters. This is mostly self-indulgent because I LOVE Below Deck, but I hope you all love it, regardless.

Click here for the Character List if you want to really form a picture in your mind.

Please like, reblog and follow if you enjoy it!

My asks are also open for feedback and ideas to how this universe can continue.

Nel xo

~

Warnings: swearing Word count: 4.2k

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Intimidating moustaches and pretty boys...

Scarlett

"Buongiorno, signora."

"Buongiorno." I handed the man with a very intimidating moustache, sitting behind the immigration inspection desk, my passport. My new bright orange floral leather sleeve sat in the crevice between his thumb and forefinger as he fingered through the pages to find the photograph page. I smiled genuinely at him before looking back to my phone to check the text that told me where I would be meeting my taxi driver. Normally the broker would arrange for the drivers to meet me with a sign in the airport arrival area, but this time it looked like I would have to meet them outside the airport in the taxi rank. Not that I minded, I just enjoyed the usual more - it made me feel famous.

"Business or pleasure, signora?"

"Business," I responded, tossing my hair over to the other side and hoisting my carry-on bag further onto my shoulder. "I'm working on a super-yacht."

The man nodded once, looking completely unimpressed, before stamping my passport and passing it back to me, waving me through to baggage claim. I smiled again at him, ignoring the fact that he looked past me with a blank stare. I got it, his job looked incredibly tedious. Having to deal with people like me; ignorant people who didn't speak the language and, worse still, refused to learn, entering his country every day. That's us Brits for you.

I wandered to the baggage claim area in pursuit of my bag. Before the upcoming season, I'd just completed a winter season sailing in Australia. My phone buzzed with the familiar 'Welcome to Italy' message from Vodafone. It buzzed again with a text from my mum.

Mum: Hope you're alright, hun. Text me when you land. Dad's still upset that you aren't coming home. Have fun. Mum x

My dad never got it, my ambition to travel. Probably never would. He hadn't been out of the country since he and Mum had split up when I was seventeen. He was happy with summers spent in Skegness and Blackpool. As soon as I found yachting I was on the first bus to Cornwall, where the training took place. My nanna had been an air hostess, so I like to think travelling is in my blood. She was brave and bold and was the first person to defend me at family gatherings for my life choices. I kept an album of her photos from her travelling days under my bed at home and kept a small Polaroid of us together in my purse. It helped when I was second-guessing myself in my job or if I was having a wobble about life. It was all the motivation I needed to keep going.

Walking through the bustling airport, I checked the screens above each luggage belt for the correct one. Amsterdam... Paris... London... Sydney. As I approached the Sydney belt, I pulled my headphones out of my bag to continue listening to the podcast I'd had on during the flight. I was in the middle of being lectured on why we were all wrong about Anna Nicole Smith by a pair of millennials - who were most likely barely birthed when she was actually alive - before the plane began to land.

The belt moved around and around for almost half an hour before any bags actually made their way out to its impatiently awaiting audience. I watched as a little boy ran to jump onto a giant black suitcase that was bulging at the sides, his dad rushed to pick both the boy and the suitcase up off the belt before they both found themselves winding back out to the mysterious place where the bags were handled. No one ever really questions where they come from or who handles them, they simply just appear. The boy's mum was in the middle of breastfeeding a very young baby but wasn't deterred from chastising the boy loud enough for me to hear over my headphones.

I watched a young lad from a group of tatted-up blokes, who I assumed were on a stag do, help an elderly man hoist his very large leopard print suitcase off the belt once he'd seen he was struggling. I then watched the elderly man wheel the case and its matching carry-on over to another elderly man who grabbed his hand to guide them both towards the arrivals exit.

I spotted my Gucci (T.K Maxx Special) monogrammed suitcase as it came steadily around the corner and stepped to pick it up, dragging it to land heavily on the shiny marble floor, being careful to not drop it on my sandalled feet. Then I just had to wait for my dad's old navy-blue duffle to wind its way through.

Walking out from the arrivals exit, the heat hit me straight in the face, but with a pleasantry that only came from the Italian Riviera. I sighed happily and slid my Dior sunglasses over my eyes. They were a gift from my last boyfriend, but for that price, there was no way they'd be going to the tip like the rest of his stuff.

Before looking for my taxi, I stepped to the side to toss my curls into a high bun. There was no way I'd make it through a hot taxi ride with probably no air conditioning with my thick black locks hanging around my neck and face. Once I was satisfied with the look after a quick check in a nearby parked car window, I lit a cigarette and checked my phone again for the licence plate number of the taxi I'd be taking to the dock.

Glancing around, my eyes landed on a sleek black Tesla. My eyebrows raised, sliding the glasses down my nose, I double-checked its plate number with my phone once more. If this luxury travel was anything to go by, this charter season, I was in for a treat.

"Grazie mille." I said as the kind man, who I learned was named Tullio, tried to carefully remove my heavy bag from the boot of the car. "It's okay you can just drop it." He smiled and wiped his brow and began to wheel it up the dock. I rushed to stump out my second cigarette on the top of the nearest bin, then trotted to catch up with him, attempting to take the handle from him. "Oh, please, um, per favore, I can take it from here." He waved me off and gestured for me to lead on. I blew a few stray curls from my forehead, smiled tight-lipped at him and stepped to start making my way up the dock.

Mega-yacht after mega-yacht passed by as I searched for the one I'd been hired on, Andiamo. I felt the awkwardness creep up my spine at the thought of meeting the crew and captain alongside Tullio. I didn't want them to think I was one of those stewardesses. I already knew that I'd give that impression with my choice of designer bag - even if it was a knock-off. I didn't need a small, sweaty Italian man in a too-tight suit trailing behind me with it to make that worse.

"Ah, here we are, grazie, Tullio." I smiled widely, stopping outside a random boat. He looked at me, one bushy brow raised in question, then shook his head and continued up the dock. My face fell and I followed him sheepishly. He must have thought I was barmy.

As we approached the end of the dock, I spotted a tall man, arms folded, looking sharp in a uniform. He was standing at the stern of a boat that the closer we approached became clear to be named, Andiamo. I couldn't see how many stripes were on his uniform but my guess was that he was the captain. The rattling of my suitcase along the creaky wooden boards of the dock grabbed his attention and he opened his arms wide, laughing sharply before clapping his hands twice.

"Ciao, bella!" The man on the boat exclaimed loudly in a very American twang, making poor Tullio jump slightly and mutter incoherently in Italian. The dock was so quiet otherwise. I smiled and brought one hand to shield my eyes and the other up to wave at him. He jogged around the side of the huge ship, practically skipped down the passerelle and hopped onto the dock as we met in the middle. "Welcome, Scarlett!" He yelled, even though we were barely two steps apart. Americans.

"Ciao, you must be-"

"Captain Bobby, a pleasure to meet you." He held a hand out for me to shake, which I did with gusto - always eager to make a good first impression and wanting to match his energy. He turned to Tullio who stood beside me. "Signore, grazie, I'll take it from here." Bobby nodded, but Tullio didn't move. "Oh, right." Bobby jumped into action, patting the pockets of his trousers in search of his wallet. Pulling it from the back of his very tight white trousers, he plucked out a note and handed it to Tullio who saluted us both and meandered back up the dock. Bobby sighed awkwardly while putting his wallet back, but he recovered quickly. "Alright, let's get you on board." He clapped his hands again, rubbing them together before hoisting my suitcase onto his shoulder with surprising ease. My eyes wandered to the bulging muscle of his upper arms in his smart white shirt and epaulettes, but only for a second before I shook it off and followed him up the passerelle, kicking off my shoes in the process.

"She's a beauty, Captain." I said, glancing around the gorgeous boat before me.

"Yeah, we've got ourselves a looker, that's for sure!" He shouted again, leading me into the bridge.

"So, Scarlett-" He said, placing my suitcase onto the pristine burgundy carpet and rolling it to sit in the corner.

"Oh, please, call me Lettie. It's what all my other boats called me." I corrected with a shrug and a smile. He nodded.

"Alright, Lettie. I've obviously read over your resume many times, but please, tell me a bit about yourself." He leaned back against the arm of the big leather captain's chair and folded his arms across his chest. He smiled and I noticed how kind his eyes were, with the way they crinkled at the corners. He was a pretty young captain from my experience, I hoped that that fact would bode well.

"Well, I'm 27 years old, I'm from Liverpool originally but I've been travelling and yachting since I was 19. I've just come from a season in Oz which was a 74-footer, and I-"

"ROBERT?!" I jolted slightly at the loud interruption that sounded like it came from the dock. I whipped around whilst the captain clapped his hands again and laughed as he squeezed my shoulder, darting out of the door. I frowned as I watched him leave and moved to look at what all the fuss was about.

"Hey hey! Harold! You're looking fresh, my man!" I leaned against the small entryway to the bridge to watch the captain jog to meet a long-haired man at the end of the passerelle. The man had round black sunglasses on, a patterned shirt that was undone to just past his chest, and loose brown shorts. He'd brought half his wardrobe if his baggage was anything to go by. I counted four black duffle bags that were bursting at the seams resting on the dock. It's a good job Tullio only had to pick me up from the airport...

"You're telling me?! Get in here you handsome bastard." The two men hugged closely, clapping their hands on each other's backs. I rolled my eyes at the bro fest and stepped back into the bridge to wander down the stairs and through to the interior of the boat. It was beautiful; varnished wooden surfaces, a luxurious curved sofa as a centrepiece, all leading to wall-to-wall double glass doors that led out to a stunning view from the aft deck, and loads of vast space. I ran my finger along a windowsill and lifted it to see a coat of dust. Sure, it was stunning, but it was fucking filthy. I sighed and looked out the window, I imagined who I would be working with and hoped that they were ready to put in some hard work because I wanted to make good money this season. I heard the low timbre of male voices approaching again and turned to see them coming down the winding stairs, still chatting and catching up.

"Ah, there she is! Harry, this is Scarlett- oh sorry, I mean Lettie. Our chief stewardess for the season." I smiled at the men and stepped to extend my hand to shake.

"Great to meet you, Scarlett. I'm the bosun." He said, smiling around a deep British accent. As he took my palm in his, I noticed how rough his hands were, the classic sign of a deckie.

"You too, Harry. You're quite young for a bosun, eh?" He shrugged and smirked.

"Maybe I'm not as young as you think."

"Harry's been my first mate for three years now, we were on another boat though. I trust you guys will work well together to figure out everything on Andiamo." I nodded dutifully and hoped that Harry wouldn't be what I suspected he'd be from first impressions. But something deep inside me secretly hoped that he would. I supposed that only time would tell.

We walked further into the interior and on down to the crew mess. The captain led the way through to explain where the crew quarters were. I was surprised by how big the space for the crew was, my previous boat had had tiny living quarters. "So, Lettie you'll have two stews under you, a girl and a guy, if I remember correctly." I nodded. "And you've actually got the same under you, H."

"Nothing new there then," Harry smirked to the captain, who rolled his eyes playfully.

"I don't wanna know, man." Captain Bobby put his hands up in surrender and wandered back out to the mess. Harry glanced back at me and I quirked a brow in his direction, before moving past him to check where the uniforms had been stored.

Just as I started sifting through the laundry room and placing uniforms into piles for everyone, I heard the captain yelling again above. The crew mess was normally very soundproof, due to all the debauchery that usually took place there - he was really that loud. I guessed that more crew were arriving.

"Hey, Harry what size t-shirt are you?" I called out to him.

"Depends, is it Fruit of the Loom?"

"Um, no. They're unbranded." I looked at the label on the neck of the bright teal-coloured shirt in my hand. I walked back out to the mess to see him sprawled out on the bench seat, munching on an apple. He'd put his shoulder-length hair into a bun that didn't look much different to my own. "They're soft though. This one's a large? What do you think?" He jumped up from where he sat in the mess and bared his chest, holding the apple in his teeth. I scoffed a laugh and held up the shirt to his chest, he nodded with a smirk, his dimples poking through each side of the apple.

"This'll do, Scar." He took the shirt from me and put it over his shoulder as he took another bite of his apple, moving past me to go into his room. My move to return to the laundry room was halted by a girl coming down the stairs.

"Hi! I'm Marnie!" The girl exclaimed, her blonde hair whipping to catch up with how quickly she'd bounded down the stairs. She pulled on the straps of her enormous backpack to readjust it on her tiny shoulders.

"Oh, hi Marnie, I'm Scarlett. But you can call me Lettie." I smiled and shook her hand and tried not to be blinded by her perfect white teeth, bared in a bright smile. "I'm the chief stew."

"Great! I'm a deckie." She explained, her strong Australian accent caused a ripple of warmth through my veins. I already missed Oz. Hearing footsteps, I turned back to see Harry jogging through the narrow corridor towards us.

"Is that a deckie, I hear?" He said, still chomping on his half-eaten apple. "Hey, I'm Harry, bosun" Marnie didn't miss a beat, opening her arms up to signal a hug, which caused Harry to hesitate slightly before accepting.

"I'm so excited for this season! Is anyone else here yet?"

"Just us and Cap so far."

"Oh, pick of the rooms then!" Marnie winked, if her speech was written down, every sentence would be finished off with an exclamation mark. I loved her already. I led her to the bedroom next to Harry's, which she'd be sharing with the engineer, who, I was pleased to see, was also female.

I continued sorting through the laundry, placing fresh uniform packs onto each of the free beds. Each pack had a pair of white shirts with epaulettes, corresponding to each role, a pair of teal polo shirts, and a pair of shorts or a skort, depending on the person. Then I started unpacking in my room.

I was in the middle of organising my knickers and bras neatly into a drawer when I heard a crash. Rushing out into the hallway I was met with Harry's confused face across from me. We looked at each other for a second before he tilted his head for me to lead the way towards the crew mess.

I gasped, "Oh, Christ, are you okay?" I reached to help the girl that was trying to lift herself up off her enormous, metallic silver, hardshell suitcase that was lying flat on the polished wooden floor.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Sorry, I'm so embarrassed."

"Did you fall down all those stairs?" I asked, Harry moved the suitcase to sit back on its four wheels, rolling it to the side of the crew mess table. The girl nodded, rubbing her elbow.

"Why didn't you get Cap to carry your suitcase down here for you? Or he could've radioed me." Harry leaned against the table, folding his arms across his chest. I took her arm in my hands and turned it inspect the possible damage.

"Wanted to do it myself." The girl said in a smaller voice. She was so petite, but I could see the lines of muscles in her bare arms, she probably could have done it herself if the stairs weren't so narrow. "I'm fine, honestly. I'll just go to my room." She shrugged her arm out of my grasp and moved towards her case. I frowned in her direction and caught Harry's eye as she moved down the hallway, he smirked, confirming that we'd both had the same thought. She was a stew.

"Um, hey, I can let you know which room you're in, what's your name?"

"Molly," she sighed in an accent I could tell hailed from either New York or Boston. "I'm second stew, I think." She stopped and glanced to look at me expectantly.

"Oh, yes. I'm Scarlett, but you can call me Lettie. I'm chief stew." I smiled slightly, I felt like I was treading on eggshells around this girl. "You're in with me," I said, beckoning her towards our room. "I hope you don't mind the top bunk, I just prefer to be on the ground." I laughed lightly. Molly smiled tight-lipped at me and lifted her suitcase up onto the top bunk with minimal effort. I knew it.

We continued to unpack in silence, I hoped that this frost that had come to rest upon the beginnings of our relationship was temporarily caused by her unwanted trip down the stairs. I'd just finished making my bed when I heard another voice, this time deep and masculine, I counted my lucky stars as I left the room.

"Hi!" It was my turn to say everything with an exclamation mark. The man jumped as I rushed towards him. He had dark shades on and just a large backpack slung over one shoulder. His megawatt smile made my belly flip - he was fucking gorgeous. "Sorry, I'm Scarlett, I'm the chief stew." Stepping forward, I collected myself and held a hand for him to shake. His bulging muscle flexed as he shook it, before lifting his shades to sit on his head and slinging his backpack to the floor.

"So nice to meet you Scarlett, I'm Jesse. I'm a steward." I quirked my brow at him, but inwardly rolled my eyes at myself for assuming that he would be a deckie.

"Nice to meet you, too! Looking forward to working with you this season. Let me show you where you'll be staying." I led Jesse to where he'd be staying with the male deckhand and left him to settle in and unpack.

I looked at my Apple Watch and decided to take a smoke break before heading up to start organising the boat. I let both of my stews know to be ready to help within the hour and headed up to the aft deck.

The sun was just beginning to set over the line where the sky met the steady waves of the sea. I sat on the teak and slid my legs through the bars to dangle over the edge of the boat. Taking a cigarette out of the personalised case my Grandma had given me and lit one. I sighed the smoke out and swung my legs back and forth in front of me, leaning an arm back to rest on. I thought about quitting every time I left a boat - smoking that is. But every time I boarded a new one all I could think about was having a ciggy out on the deck. It was just too easy, the culture was smoking and, to be honest, I'd find myself desperate for one after a hard day on charter.

I took another deep drag and brought my gaze to the crystal-clear water below me. I watched two bright blue fish swim in circular patterns, one of them chasing the other. I smiled softly, leaning my chin on my arm on the metal rail. The warm breeze blew through my curls and made me feel content for a few moments.

"Hey, mind if I knick one of those?" I jumped slightly at the interference of my peace but recognised Harry's low timbre. I turned to face him, his figure stood in the golden sunshine, making him look rather yummy. I nodded and passed him my case and lighter. He flicked it open as he swung his legs through the bars to sit beside me. Lighting up, he looked closer at the metal case, turning it in his hand. He ran his thumb across the raised imagery and wording. "Is this supposed to be you?"

I laughed, blowing another puff of smoke through my lips and nostrils. "What do you think?"

"I think if it's an accurate portrayal, I can't wait to see you in a bikini." I laughed again, taking the case back and looking at it myself. On the front, there was an illustration of an extremely voluptuous woman, naked apart from the flames engulfing her intimate parts. Her head was tilted back, eyes hooded and mouth agape sensually. But her flowing dark curls were where our similarities ended, I could assure him that much.

Yeah, nana wasn't your average grandma.

"I bet. Shame I only brought one-pieces, then, isn't it?" I said, side-eyeing him as I blew more fumes from my lips. I moved to put the case to my side on the teak.

"Ah, I'm sure I've got something you can borrow." He rebuffed casually, looking out to the sunset before us. I side-eyed him harder.

"You've brought bikinis?" I questioned, running my tongue along my the edges of my top teeth in curiosity, a slight lift in the corner of my mouth.

"One or two may have ended up in my suitcase, comes with the territory." I scoffed and rolled my eyes playfully at his cocky wink in my direction. He was one of those guys who had a permanent smirk on his lips. I always got on with guys like that, at least at first. I was never one to take to people who took life too seriously. They usually ended up taking the joke a step too far though.

I decided to chance it and give him a once over as he looked out to sea. His hair was still pulled back in a hair tie, with wispy baby hairs dancing in the warm breeze. Green eyes, squinting in the sunlight but still glittering in the reflection of the ocean beneath us. He had a prominent nose with large nostrils, but it only served to enhance his distinctive face. He interrupted gruffly, a slight cough directed into a fist brought to his mouth. "You should know that. Been in the industry for an age, haven't you."

I glanced back outwards, lining up the tip of my cigarette between my two fingers with the edge of where the sky met the sea. "Certainly feels that way," I mumbled slightly, closing one eye as the scorched tip continued to sizzle away. "Yachting years are like dog years. My body would definitely agree." I decided not to question how he knew the length of time I'd been yachting, it wasn't uncommon for staff to read each other's files before a season, especially the bosun.

"Your body definitely speaks for itself." Harry side-eyed me again, taking a long pull from his cigarette over smirking lips. He was going hard, but I couldn't afford to let my imagination run too wild. He was the bosun and as the chief stew, we needed to have a strong relationship onboard. Which meant avoiding a catastrophic relationship off-board. Although, I let my mind wander to all the ways I could make him feel catastrophic.

Shaking my head and ridding myself of the thoughts, I stubbed my cigarette out in the crystal ashtray I'd found behind the bar in the main salon and moved to stand.

"Alright, pretty boy," I said, before leaning down to speak into his ear, hands squeezing his broad shoulders. "I think it's time we did some work, yeah?" With that, I left him with a parting tap, but I could feel his eyes on me as I walked away. Looking into my reflection before the double glass doors began to slide open, the suspicion was confirmed with a glance at him behind me.

This was going to be one hell of a season.

[peninkwrites]

The Showfall Aftershow!

THIS TRANSCRIPT AND ALL OF ITS CONTENTS ARE THE PROPERTY OF SHOWFALL MEDIA. THIS TRANSCRIPT IS IN REVISION AND CANNOT BE PUBLISHED UNTIL THE REVISED TEXT HAS BEEN REMOVED. ANY DISTRIBUTION OF THIS MATERIAL WITHOUT REVISION WILL BE CONSIDERED AN AUDITION TO JOIN THE CAST. THE TRANSCRIPT CAN ALSO BE ACCESSED ON THE ARCHIVE OF OUR OWN FOR CHAPTERED READING

THE HOST: Welcome back to the Showfall After Show!  As always, I have the honor of hosting on behalf of Showfall Media.   For those new to Showfall, this is where we get into the nitty gritty of the volume, where we talk about our favorite moments, the unexpected twists, and of course, recognize our top-tier talents!

[applause]

TH: [laughs] Glad to hear we’re all excited!  I will say, just like this was a very special volume, this is a very special After Show.  For the first time ever, Showfall aired to a live audience!  To celebrate that, we’re going try another first, interviewing the whole cast tonight! 

[applause]

TH: I can hardly wait!  And what a cast do we have tonight!  Kicking off this Premiere of Showfall’s first cast interview: you were endeared to him from the moment he talked about his pet fish, you laughed at his antics, and cried when he finally died, let’s welcome Ethan Nestor!

[applause]

ETHAN NESTOR:  Hello?  Where am I?  I thought I… I don’t understand.  Please, please, can you help me?

ETHAN NESTOR: Thank you!  Thank you all so much, it's really just such an honor to be here.

[applause]

TH:  And we’re happy to have you, Ethan!  Tell us, how did it feel, to be the first to speak on the carousel?  No pressure, right? [laughs]

EN: Why are you laughing?  I don’t understand.  I don’t know where I am, I… I didn’t want to be there, I wanted to go home.  But I

EN: [laughs] Right!  No pressure at all, huh?

TH: But I’ll say you handled it with grace!  We could tell you were a little nervous, do you mind telling us why that is?  Was it just first day jitters, or something more?

EN: I said I want to go home!  But I… I remember I went through that doorway and… oh fuck, I… I don’t know why I’m here, I don’t understand

EN: I mean, yeah, you could say first day jitters, for sure.  But at the same time, some of the nerves were totally from having to plead for my life, y’know?

TH: We’ve all been there!

EN: What the fuck are you talking about?!  I… I was scared out of my fucking mind, I don’t…

[audience laughter]

EN: This is just a fucking joke, huh?!  I… why can’t I move?  Why can’t I… I want to leave, but I can’t move, why can’t I move

EN: [laughs] I know, right?  But I think I did a good job pleading my case!  I… I know I got a little choked up there, which was a little embarrassing.

TH: No, no it’s not embarrassing at all!  I think we all were touched by your speech about your beloved fish, Turner.  Am I right, folks?

[audience ‘aw’s]

EN: Who the fuck is Turner?!

EN: I mean, I just love the little guy so much!  Aw, dang, I’m… I’m getting choked up now!

TH: That’s okay, Ethan!  Who could blame you?  Now, I have to ask, were you disappointed when the audience didn’t pick you?

EN: A little, sure, but I understand it was some tough competition.  We all wanted to make it out of there alive, you know?

TH: [laughs] So true!

EN: But it wasn’t fair, right?  It… it didn’t have to be like… what the fuck is happening?  I died

EN: I know it was a bit of a hiccup in the show, when the Puzzler shot Nihachu point blank–

TH: Twice!

[laughter]

EN: What about… what about the other guy?  What about Vinny?  He died too, he died, I died, wait.  Why isn’t anyone fucking listening to me?!  I died

EN: Right, [laughs] twice, but I mean, it ended up being an opportunity, huh?  In the long run, of course.

TH: True, but not a very long run, am I right?

[laughter]

TH:  Now, you made it pretty far, but that last puzzle you got… well, you were caught between a rock and a hard place, huh?  Well, not as much as Austin was!

[laughter]

EN: He didn’t make it?  None of them made it?  Did I make it?

EN: I sure was, but yeah, [laughs], not as much as Austin!

TH: So, Ethan, did you have any regrets in that last moment?

EN: I just don’t fucking understand, I don’t know why I can’t move, I think I’m dead, I think I’m supposed to be dead, but I

EN: No, Host, I don’t think I did, actually.  I was proud of what I did accomplish, you know, in the time I was given, I guess, actually…

TH: Oh?  Is there something?

EN: Yes!  Yes there’s fucking something!  I should be dead!  But no one can fucking hear me!

EN: I guess, I just wish I could’ve seen Turner one last time, just, looked into his little eyes…

EN: Fucking hell, this can’t be happening

TH: Do you think he was out there?  Cheering you on?

EN: I thought he was supposed to be a fish

EN: I know he was.  Up until the very end.

TH: Beautifully put, Ethan.  Thank you so much for coming out tonight.  Can we give him another round, folks?

[applause]

EN: Wait!  Wait, don’t!  Don’t take me away again!  Please, why can’t I just go?  Why didn’t I die?  Why can’t anyone hear me?!

EN: It was my pleasure!

[applause]

TH: What a fun start to the evening!  Unemployed or not, that lovable scamp sure touched our hearts, right folks?

[applause]

TH: We've got plenty more interviews to come!

TH:  Next in the line up, a hoarder full of tricks, you cheered when he succeeded, and laughed at his hilarious misfortune, give it up for the comic relief, Vinny Vinesauce!

VINNY VINESAUCE: How's it going tonight, everybody?

[laughter]

TH: Welcome!

VV: Did I make it?  I was… I made it across the room, is this what comes after?  Did I make it?

VV: It’s great to be here!

TH: So, Vinny, you served as a spur of the moment stand in for Nihachu, am I right?

VV:  She was dead.  A woman died, why are you acting like it didn’t matter

VV: Yeah, yeah I did!

TH: How did it feel, having to hop in last minute; challenging?  Exciting?  Did you feel ready?

VV: She was dead.  That scared me, I know it did, so why

VV: Well, I felt pretty lucky.  I was given an opportunity!  I mean, not gonna lie, I was a little thrown off when I came into the candy room and saw her corpse, but I got into the groove of things pretty quick!

TH: You definitely did!  I think we were all blown away with how you surprised us in the laser room.

VV: I made it across, it… it doesn’t make sense, but I did, right?  So, does that mean I get to live?  Is that what this is?  Hello?  Are you guys hearing me at all?

VV: It surprised me too!

[laughter]

TH: But you’d done it before, yes?  Isn’t that what you said?

VV: When?

VV: Yeah!  Of course, lots of times.

TH: So what surprised you, then?

VV: I mean, I gotta say I was a little surprised about the twist after that!

TH: Oh, skipping right to your ending, huh?  I know we all got a laugh after you got your head crushed by that anvil!  What were you thinking in those last moments?

VV:  I’m dead.  Oh my god, wait, I remember, I’m actually fucking dead, so how am I

VV: Mostly just, ‘oh no’.

[laughter]

TH: Of course!  Thanks for coming out, Vinny!  Don’t let an anvil hit you on the way out!

VV: [laughs] I’ll do my best!

TH: Let’s give it up for Vinny one last time, cheers to him getting through his hoarding problem and showing up!

[applause]

TH:  Now, moving on to the fan favorite, our female lead, the nicest girl around, Niki Nihachu!

NIKI NIHACHU: What’s… what’re you doing?  What are you saying?  Did you say female lead?  Because I was the only girl there?

NIKI NIHACHU: Hi, Host!  Hi!  How are you all doing?

TH: Oh, we’re doing just great, Niki!  How are you doing?  No tears yet today?

NN: No, no I’m not crying, I’m fucking pissed off, okay?  I did what I was told, I… I played nice and I got taken out of the game early.

NN: [giggles]  No, not yet!

TH: So, Niki, how did it feel when the audience picked you?

NN: I should have kept going and it’s not fucking fair.

NN: Oh, I was so relieved, Host.  I couldn’t believe it!

TH: Really?  But you’re so nice!  How could they not pick you?

NN: Are we not going to fucking talk about how I got cheated?!  I… I was shot!  I… wait, wait I was shot, so…

NN: I don’t know, there were so many cool, impressive people they could have picked, and I’m just, you know, a girl who wanted to live!

[audience ‘aw’s]

NN: I wanted to live!  I still want to live!  I’m here!  I’m in here, I don’t… I don’t know how, but I’m still alive!  Last time, I tried, I told you all I was still alive, he shot me and I was still fucking alive!

TH: And that’s all you need to be, Niki.

NN: I was still alive!  I could’ve lived, and he… he shot me again!  He shot me again, and you let him!  You all let him kill me!

NN: Thank you, I’m touched.

TH: Now, I don’t mean to press, but do you want to maybe talk about how you got a little… well, over emotional, at the start there?  We won’t blame you, a sweet girl like you, of course you’d cry when told you were going to be blown up!

NN: I… That was me.  No, it’s not… I remember doing that.  It wasn’t you all making me, I was breaking down because I didn’t want to die, and then you.. You made me stop.  How did you make me stop?!

NN: Oh, now I’m embarrassed!

TH: Aw, I bet some of the boys would’ve cried too if they were pushed a little further!

NN: [giggles] I guess I’m just sensitive!

NN: Why do I get ‘giggle’ when all the rest just laugh?  Why’d you turn me into this?!  Why did you… I don’t understand, I’m just… You made me weak.  All that could come through was the tears, I couldn’t fight.  How did you do that?

TH: Now, could we, real quick, talk about our little mishap at the end of your run?

NN: Oh, sure, but I don’t want anyone to get the wrong idea.  Accidents happen!  I’m sure the Puzzler didn’t mean anything by it when he pulled the trigger!

TH: Twice!

NN: [giggles] Yes, twice!  But still, I don’t want to make a fuss, it’s really alright!

TH: Aw, that’s so nice of you, Niki!

NN: I try!

TH: Now– Oh!  Are you feeling alright, Niki?

NN: Hm?  What?

TH: You’re crying.

NN: Oh! [giggle] I don’t know why I’m doing that!  It’s really fine!  It's no trouble, really.  I'm fine!

NN: I want to live… please, please someone help me, I want to live.  Please!  Please, someone fucking help me!  Please!  I didn’t want to die!  This isn’t fair!

TH: Well, thank you so much for coming out, Niki, and being your sweet self.

NN: I don’t want to die.  Please don’t make me go, please, it’s not fair!  I want to live!  Please.

NN: Thank you, Host!  I’m just so happy I could make everyone’s days just a little brighter.  I’m just so happy.

NN: Please.  I'm scared

NN: I'm just so happy.

TH: Wasn’t she lovely, folks?  Let’s give her another round of applause!

[applause]

TH: Let’s move on to an old favorite!  You all loved his apathy, his disdain, his witty quips, his bromance with his co-star, give it up for Sneegsnag!

SNEEGSNAG: Hey.  What's up?  Uh, crazy to be here tonight.  Just crazy.

TH: Are you sure you feel that way?  You sound pretty uninterested, Sneeg!

[laughter]

S:  I’m still here.  How the fuck am I still here?!

S: Ha, well, you know me.  I’m just kinda chill about it all, right?

TH: That you are!  Now, Sneeg, compared to some of your costars, we got to see more of you!  What was it like working on Episode 1?

S: Help!  One of you, fucking help me!  All of you!  Just stop sitting there doing nothing!

S: I mean, it was cool.  It was chill.  Being in a cage like, forever kinda sucked, but me and Frank made it work.  That was before the show technically started, though.

TH:  Right, Frank! Your zany co-star!  Word on the street is he was popular on set!

S: Frank, man!  Frank is the best.  He’s like, so funny and definitely has the best comebacks out of… out of anybody!

TH: You and Frank particularly were close, right?  Some might even call it a bromance?

S: I mean, yeah, you spend all of your living memory up until that point in a tiny cage with the guy, it forges a bond.  Without Frank, I probably would’ve tried to kill myself.  Like, just from the boredom part, not even counting that demon dude showing up sometimes.

TH: I mean, you wouldn’t be alone, that’s what Frank did!

[laughter]

S: There was a corpse in the room with me, all that time and I didn’t even know it.  I was in that cage for so fucking long, as long as… I dunno.  I don’t remember before that.  It was… it was a skeleton, but then… then I could see it, could see him, and the smell, fucking christ, the smell

S: [laughs] Yeah, I guess.  The middle part of the show wasn’t so bad.  It was kinda fun ragging on Ranboo.  He sorta sucked as a hero at the beginning.

TH: A hero’s journey is about growth, Sneeg!

S: Yeah.  Guess so.  Like, he couldn’t even stop me from getting ripped apart by that stupid shark thing.  I mean, he totally saw me screaming! Psh.

S: No, no I don’t want to remember that part, I don’t want to remember any of it, that fucking thing looking like a joke but the pain was real, the pain when it dragged me through the wall and started tearing

TH: True!  And not long before, the two of you went Mano a Mano!  Was that fun to film?

S: Huh?  Oh, yeah, I dunno.  Don’t remember that bit.  Got slimed.  Sorta shoved me out of my body for a little.

TH: Right, of course!  The slime!  Was the goop the worst part about that day on set, do you think?

S: It’s not slime!  Please, any of you, I fucking saw it!  It’s… it’s not fucking slime.

S: No, no if I’m not gonna say spending all of my living memory in a cage I’d probably say the bit where I stood still for eight hours.

TH: You weren’t entertained by the demons?

S: No.

TH: Oh.

S: I couldn’t move, man!  I literally could not move!  It wasn’t… it wasn’t eight hours.  It wasn’t, but it felt like it.  It hurt like it.  Fuck, how did they do that?!  My body just wouldn't do what I said, they took that control away from me, do none of you see that?!  Do you not see how fucked up it is?!

S: And after Ranboo woke back up, like, moving again after that much time was kinda like more torture. And more torture.

TH: Sneeg, you know how to complain like no one else!

S: I have a fucking right to!

S: Yeah and they continued to be totally incompetent.  Like, they so could’ve done something about the shark.

S: No, no shut up, I’m not saying that shit!  He was just some kid, I’m not… I’m not empty like that!  I care!  I fucking cared about him, you can’t just take that away!

TH: But they didn’t!  Do I sense some drama among the cast?

S:  He was just some fucking kid!  I said… I said I was gonna come back for him, but I didn’t even make it out.  Did anyone make it out?  Fuck, that thing tore me apart, I didn’t get out the fucking door, but I died, how the fuck did I die?!

S: What?  No, nah we’re chill.  He like, wiped the slime off me and picked me to come off the carousel.  He’s my boy.

TH: Should we talk about the carousel?  I think we should talk about the carousel.

S: I promised I was gonna come back and get them out

S: Uh.  Yeah.  I dunno.  Sure.

TH: You’ve got to admit, it was a little unprofessional, you leaving in the middle there.  Was there something more going on?

S: I saw it!  I saw him, I saw Charlie, disemboweled on the fucking table!  No one else could see the blood!  No one else saw the fucking rotting corpse chained up beside us!  Charlie was screaming!  He was fucking screaming because they tore him apart!  And no one did anything, no one was fucking moving!

S: No, nothing.  Shit happens, y’know?  I got back on, and got back to work.  I even survived for a long time, so.  That was pretty cool.  Sorta sucked when the Puzzler took my man Frank out of the game, but rules are rules.

TH: Rules are rules!  Are you feeling alright, Sneeg?  Not going to run out on us again, are you?  You’ve got that sort of hazy look again.

S: You don’t understand what I fucking saw!  You don’t know what’s really going on here!  There was so much blood!  Fuck… oh fucking hell, there was so much blood…

S: Nah, not planning on going anywhere.

TH: You know, I see you’re not wearing your hat today.

S: Uh, hat?

TH: Yeah! The hat that you acquired on the carousel.  It caused quite a buzz for the audience!  Would you like to tell us more about that?

S: Why was that it?!  It was a fucking hat!  It was covered in blood because it came from inside someone!  He was still alive, he was still screaming, how the fuck did they keep him alive like that, why did they keep him alive why are they keeping me alive

S: What, that I like to accessorize?  It was just kinda slimy because it came out of that dude on the hospital bed, but that’s about it.

TH: So, you can tell the folks at home there was nothing else to that hat?

S: Nope.

TH: Well, you heard it from the man himself!  The hat was just an accessory.  Thank you for showing up, Sneegsnag.

S: Not like I had a choice.

[laughter]

S: Stop it!  Stop fucking laughing!  You heard him, you heard me!  I said I don’t have a choice!  Does that not mean anything to you people?!  Hey!  Don’t fucking touch me!  I’m not walking away!  I’m not!  I’m not choosing to do this!  How do I stop?!  How do I fucking stop?!  I need this to stop!

TH: Wasn’t he just a riot?  What a guy!  But the night is only getting better!  On to the next interview, folks!

TH: The night is only getting better!  You know him as a smooth talker, witty and handsome to boot, please welcome our own Mr. Congeniality, Frank!

[uproarious applause]

FRANK:

[laughter]

TH: Good to see you!  Now, you’ve become a bit of an icon since the show.  How does all that attention feel?

F:

TH: Humble and handsome! Frank, you’re a delight!

F:

TH: I mean every word!  Now, Frank, you had a smaller role in the first episode, but you definitely made the most of it!  Were your jokes on the rocking horse improvised or scripted?

F:

TH: Interesting!  I think we were all sad that your charm stopped at the carousel.  Were you surprised that you weren’t picked?

F:

TH: I guess in that sense you were picked, huh?  That’s a nice way to look at it.

F:

[laughter]

TH: Speaking of, it looked like you and Sneeg were two peas in a pod for a while there!

F:

TH: Oh?  Really?

F:

[audience ‘aw’s]

TH: That’s so touching.  Really, a beautiful confession.  And… have you told him you feel this way?

F:

TH: Wow.  Well, I’m sure he feels the same way.

F:

TH: Sadly, Sneeg’s interview has already passed, so that’s all we have to go on, I’m afraid.  I guess you’ll never get to tell him how you feel, huh?  Ever!  Rotten luck.

F:

TH: I’d like to believe that too, Frank.

F:

TH: How profound!  Wow.  What a thought provoking note to end on.  I wish you could stay here all night, but sadly, we must move on.  One last round of applause for Frank!

[applause]

TH: Alright, folks, this shady character had us laughing from the moment he made up– I mean mentioned, his kids!  He’s gay, he’s a liar, and he is here for an interview!  Give it up for Austin of the AustinShow!

AUSTIN: Hey, what's this I hear about me making up my kids?

[laughter]

A:  No, no really, that wasn’t a joke.  I’m not lying.  I’m not!  I… I have them!  I have kids, and a wife.  A very real wife.

[laughter]

TH: Right, sure you do, Austin!  Let’s focus on the games for now, huh?  You showed up late to the party, right?  You and Ethan came through the tunnels all the way in the closet, but I’m guessing you’re not unfamiliar with closets, huh?

[laughter]

A: I– What?

A: This is just cheap.  And at least a little homophobic.  That’s it?  That’s the joke?  I’m gay and I’m lying about having a beard?  I died for this?  Really?  For this?  Wait, wait I died for… I died

TH: Don’t worry about it, Austin, let’s just talk about some of our favorite shenanigans of yours!  You and Ethan were really the bells of the ball, huh?  Some fierce competition between you two!

A: Yes, yes right, I mean, I was largely doing it to escape with my life, and return to my family–

TH: Sure you were!  How’d those heels fit, Austin?

A: I died,  you people killed me and all you could come up with is a man in a dress joke?  You’re pathetic.

A: Poorly, of course.  I… I could barely walk in them, but I don’t see how that’s relevant.

TH: Right, right.  Now, Austin, your ending.  It got pretty intense there, huh?

A: I spent my last hours running around like a panic, terrified idiot because of you people and I got crushed to death like it meant nothing.  You basically had me let myself die, didn’t you?

A: Oh, yes.  I fought my hardest.  Only one of us could go through, and I was so sure it had to be me.  I had people waiting on me, you know.

TH: That’s why you fought so hard, huh?  It seemed to me more like you were a bit of a chicken.  You’d been squeamish at the sight of blood through the whole show!

A: The others didn’t care!  Why didn’t they care?!  Ethan’s blood spilled out and they just stared at me like I was the crazy one!  I wasn’t crazy!  Even if they tried to make me be!

A: I prefer to think of myself as empathetic.  I saw people die, several, in fact.  Is that not supposed to leave a lasting impression?

TH: Now, considering your desperate drive to live, did you have any last wishes you didn’t get to fulfill before your untimely demise?

A: I just… I just wish I could tell my kids one last time how much their papa loves them.

TH:  Of course, I’m sure, of course.  And, what were their names again?

A: It’s– they’re– uh…

TH: I think I better let you off the hook, there, Austin, but thank you for showing up, even if you weren’t being entirely honest with us!

A: You won’t even let me say my last wishes!  You’ve killed me, and you’re puppeteering my corpse into being one last joke!  It’s sick!  You’re all sick!

A: But I was!  I was being honest!

TH: Of course, Austin.  Another round of applause for that very straight man, and the missus back home!

[laughter]

[applause]

TH: Alright, folks, our penultimate interviewee, a triple threat, the goopiest guy around, you loved him as the devil, you loved him as a patient, and you loved him live on twitch, just as he wanted to make– I mean give love to you, give it up for Charlie Slimecicle!

CHARLIE SLIMECICLE: Aha, that's me!  I'm the goopiest guy!  Wow!

TH: Now, Charlie, other than the hero, you played I’d say a very important role in the show!

CS: Multiple roles, actually!

[laughter]

TH: Can I ask which of the three was your favorite?

CS:  Hello?!  Hello?!  Somebody?!  Hello!  Where is he?!  Where’s Ranboo, what did you do to him?!  Ranboo!  Oh, oh god, how did I… I shouldn’t be… Ranboo!  Ranboo!

CS:  What the fuck did you do to him?!  Who are you people?!  I don’t know how I… how I got here, how I didn’t see it… oh god, please fucking tell me Ranboo made it out, please, please at least let me see him, so I know he’s okay, please, I’ll cooperate, I swear, I will

TH: Um, Charlie?  Too hard a question for you?

CS: What?  Oh, no, Host!  Sorry, just a lot of options to work through!

TH: I mean, there’s three?

[laughter]

CS: It’s a big decision!

CS:  No, no I’m not fucking doing this right now, I’m not.  I don’t care about your stupid games, I’m not going to believe in this, I’m not going to let you people make me believe in this ever again, but I’ll pretend, I will if you just tell me if Ranboo is okay, please just let him go

CS:  I think I’d have to say the hospital patient!

TH: Oh, what a fun choice!

CS: They disemboweled me!  They had that fucking kid disembowel me!  I was begging them to stop!  It should’ve killed me, it should’ve fucking killed me!  I wanted to die then but I didn’t!  And you people just had them keep tearing into me!  They fucking disemboweled me!

TH: Oops, looks like we’re getting some microphone feedback here!  Usually it only cuts out like this if there’s too much noise!  One second, folks!

CS:  Go ahead!  Smother me!  Kill me!  Drown me in my own fucking blood and call it slime!  I won’t stop screaming until you fucking put me down like a dog!  If that’s all we are to you people, then just shoot me like one!  Shoot me!

CS: Sorry, Host, what was the question?

TH: Favorite role!  You were talking about being the hospital patient?

CS: I’m not… I am not a person! [laughs]  I’m not!  You made me!  You made those memories of a cabin and a life and then you just took it all away!  So just tell me, I will do literally anything, I’ll stay in that miserable cabin alone, I’ll lie there while you rip me apart, I will sell myself on twitch, I don’t care, just please someone fucking tell me Ranboo got out okay!   Please!  Anyone?!  Any of you!  Please!

CS: I mean, it was so easy, right?  I just had to lie there and let Ranboo, y’know dig around! [laughs]

TH: And how did you fit all of that in your stomach, Charlie?

CS: What can I say!  I’m a hungry guy!

[laughter]

CS: Stop talking!  They gutted me and stuffed me with fucking garbage and I was still alive!  Is that it?!  I can't die?  Can any of us die?  Is that what this is?!  Oh, god, oh fuck, we can’t actually die [laughs] We can’t actually fucking die!

TH: Now, I know this isn’t about that role, but forgive me, I’m curious!  What was it like playing Ranboo’s sidekick?  We all loved that twist when they took off your headphones!

CS: Ha, what?

CS: That was… that was part of it?  That was part of the show?!  None of it was real?!  None of it was actually real?!  Where’s Ranboo?!  Where are all of them?!  Are we all still alive?!  Please, please I’m begging you, I’m begging you just stop hurting them, just leave Niki and… and Sneeg, and Ethan, and Ranboo,  Austin, Vinny, leave them alone, okay?  Or just… just please don’t do to them what you did to me.  Please, don’t make them play… play the hospital patient.  Just not that.  Just do it to me.  That’s all I ask.  Oh, fuck, what am I doing, none of you are listening!

TH: I mean, the action sequences, the chase scenes, it’s all so thrilling!  And the heartbreak of finding out it was all for nothing, it was all part of the show!  Or, sorry, I guess you weren’t there for that part!

CS:  Ha.  Yeah.  Of course.

CS:  They didn’t get out… it was all part of the show, it was all just nothing, they never had a chance, none of us had a fucking chance and even the stupid fucking part of me you programmed for this interview doesn’t know what to do anymore!  You broke it!  You beefed it!  You cannot just keep twisting people like this!  You can’t!

TH:  How about your death scene, huh?  Oh, I was about to cry when you were begging Ranboo to keep running, when the head of security finally took you over, I just got chills!

CS: I mean, what’s one more role, right, Host? [laugh]

TH: Are you feeling okay, Charlie?  You look a little green.

[laughter]

CS: I’m fine!  I’m doing great!  Probably just need some slime to recover from all that running!  I mean slime.  I mean slime.  I mean slime.  I mean slime–

CS: Time!  Say it!  Say fucking time!  Be a person for one freaking minute before we get cut open again!

TH: Well, okay then, Charlie, we’ll give you that slime! [laughs]

CS: (overlapping) I mean time.

TH: What was that?

CS: I meant time.  I meant to stay time.

TH: Did you now.

CS: Thank fucking god!  Ha!  You can’t bury me forever you fucked up assholes!

TH: Well, Charlie.  Clearly, you’re tired.  I think we should end the interview here and you can get some rest in the… capable hands of our Showfall staff, alright?

CS:  Sure thing, Host!

CS: Fucking do your worst!  What’re you gonna do, rip out my organs?!  Come at me, man!  I can’t control my body anymore, but you can’t fucking stop me from screaming at you until your stupid mics break!

TH:  Thank you for your slime, Charlie.

CS: Time.

TH: [laughs] No, no I definitely said slime!

CS: Whatever.

CS: Ha!  Whatever!

TH: Let’s move on to the last interview of the night!  I’m… I’m losing stamina!  Huh, folks?  Let’s… let’s try and keep the energy up, why don’t we?

[applause]

TH:  This is the moment you’ve all been waiting for!  Our hero!  Our Martyr!  Our favorite toy!  Put your hands together for the one, the only, Ranboo!

[applause]

Ranboo: What...?  Where... Where am– Wait, wait no.  No, this isn't fair, you said I could die!  Please!  Please, you said I could die!  it was supposed to end!  Please!

TH: Aw, it’s a bit early in the night for tears, Ranboo!  We haven’t even gotten to the interview questions yet!

R: Interview..?  I’m not… I’m not playing along anymore.  I don’t… I don’t care.  I don’t… I don’t want to do this, oh god, I don’t want to do this…

TH: Well, Ranboo, as your costar Sneeg said, you don’t have a choice!

[applause]

R: Stop it!  Just shut up!  Just let me die!  You voted for it!  You wanted it!  Kill me!

TH: Well, actually, you did die, Ranboo!  And then we brought you back!  Audience polls on the livestream voted to kill you, sure, but ratings say they really want you back.

R: Kill me!  Please, please just kill me!

TH: Now, Ranboo, how did it feel to play the hero on a Showfall production?  That’s a lot of pressure for a young star!

R: Kill me!  Just let me die!  Let me die!  Let me die! Let me die!

TH: Whoa, there, Ranboo, if you keep hitting your head back like that, you’ll hurt yourself, and we won’t be able to finish the interview!

R: Kill me!  Please!  Please, you lied!  You said you’d let me go!  You said you would!

TH: One moment, folks, I’m going to have some of our fantastic crew make sure Ranboo can complete the interview.  We wouldn’t want to let our wonderful viewers down, now, would we, Ranboo?

R: Stop it!  No, don’t– Don’t touch me!  Get off of me!  You said you’d kill me!  You said–

TH: Sorry, Ranboo, there’s no puzzles or rings of keys for you to go through on this one!

[laughter]

R: Let go of me!  Let me go!  Stop it, don’t touch me!  I don’t want– I don’t want you to–

TH: Much better!  You can still look at me, and the audience, but you won’t hit your head!  Let’s give it up for our great crew, give it up for the rats!  How they put up with these brooding young stars, I’ll never know!

[applause]

R: I swear to god, I will find a way to kill myself if you people don’t–

TH: And then Showfall will bring you back, Ranboo.  Please, we already got through the exposition in your finale, let’s focus on the interview questions.  So, how did it feel to play the hero in a Showfall production?

TH: Ranboo, the lights don’t go off, I won’t stop asking, and you don’t get to move an inch until the interview is over.  That’s how this works.  

R: I’m not… I’m not a hero.  Please, I’m not…

TH: [laughs] Oh?  Interesting take!  I love the genre subversion!  If you’re not a hero, then what are you, Ranboo?

R:  I don’t… I don’t know, how could I know?  You took it all, you took everything... How could I know?  I don’t…

TH: Humor me a little!  Playing along is part of the fun!  I’ll try again––this is actually a good question, Ranboo, you did a good job, might make a fine interviewer one day!––if you’re not a hero, then what are you?

TH: Take your time, not like we’ve got a live audience waiting!

[laughter]

TH: What are you, Ranboo?

R: I’m… tired.  I’m tired.

TH: Aw, look at that face, folks!  Doesn’t it just make your heart break?  We love a tragedy here, don’t we?  And you certainly have the talent to pull it off!

[audience ‘aw’s]

R: Why didn’t… why didn’t you just turn the mask back on?  Why’re you letting me be like this?

TH: Come on, Ranboo, the interviewer asks the questions!  Sorry if I made you think it was the other way around.

[laughter]

R: Ask me something, then.

TH: I’d be happy to!  Now, Ranboo, you clearly dabble in genre subversion, but I think the one twist we’re all dying to hear about:  The codes.  The codes, am I right folks?

[applause]

TH:  Why didn’t you listen to the audience’s pick?  You probably didn’t know this until now, but they actually told you the right one!  They had your best interests at heart!  It’s touching, really.

R:  I hurt people.  I let people get hurt.  I wasn’t in control, they were.  So, why didn’t they turn the mask back on?

TH: Aw, you’re trying this back and forth thing?  I ask one, you ask one?  Fine, fine!  Sounds fun.  Because, Ranboo.  We here at Showfall are all about authenticity. There’s nothing quite like being real with an audience.  We just wanted them to see your true self!  Now, Ranboo.  My turn! [laughs] Isn’t this fun?  Now, Ranboo.  Near the finale, after that dramatic chase through the mall, after you and Charlie found the cabin set––what a twist!  Am I right folks?––and then Security came out!  Oh, what a jumpscare! [laughs]  I’m getting ahead of myself, sorry, it’s just exciting!  My question for you, Ranboo, is why did you leave Charlie?

R: …What?

TH: Why did you leave Charlie?

R: I… I don’t…

TH: I mean, come on, you were, basically, mostly, in control of yourself, your mask was going haywire, that was actually your choice to make!  So, why did you leave him?

R: I couldn’t… I couldn’t save him, I couldn’t, I was too late, he told me to– to run, I couldn’t save him, I couldn’t–

TH: Really, Ranboo?  You didn’t even try.  You saw how the show came together by then, you don’t know if he was beyond saving, and as for telling you to run, [laughs] it’s not the first time Charlie’s speech came out, well, a little different.  How do you know, for certain, that Charlie wasn’t actually begging for his life, like he was on that operating table?

R: Why are you doing this?

TH: Now, Ranboo, you’ve got to answer my question first!  Then I answer yours!  This is your game, remember?

R: I don’t… I don’t know, I don’t know.

TH: Hm, bit of a cop out, but it’s late in the night, we’ll keep things rolling!  And in answer to your question, Ranboo, we here at Showfall are honored to provide authentic, life-altering, one of a kind entertainment.  What better reason is there than that?  Hang on, that’s not my question. [laughs]   Ranboo, in episode one you got to cook for demon Charlie!  If you could go back and pick another ingredient, knowing what you know about the shark monster that killed your friend Sneeg, what would you pick?

R: Knowing what I know now?

TH: Yes!

R: I’d have killed myself.

[laughter]

R: Maybe Charlie too.

[laughter]

R: And Sneeg, if it was the only way to get them free.

[laughter]

TH: Now, I don’t know what that has to do with cooking, but thanks for playing!

[laughter]

R: You lied to me.  And to them.  You people told me I could die, that I could rest, and you didn’t let me.  You didn’t let me.

TH: Well, actually Ranboo, we very much did!  You were dead as a doornail in that box, but like I said, we just couldn’t get enough of you!  So, yes, we did as we said, and we killed you, and now you get to go again!  Isn’t that fun?  Who knows!  Maybe they’ll vote differently next time, huh?

TH: Nothing to say?

TH: Maybe we should give him some encouragement, folks!

[applause]

R: [screams]

TH: Whoa!  Nothing like some electricity to wake you up!  Shall we talk about the votes?

R: [inaudible]

TH: What was that?

TH: Aw, I think our hero is getting a little tired!  And honestly, I am too! [laughs] but thank you so much for coming out, Ranboo.

R: One day I’m gonna kill all of you.

TH: And thank you for tuning in to this Showfall Aftershow!

[applause]

[ssa-sapphic]

Pairing: Emily Prentiss × (POC)fem!oc

Previous Chapter: part one

Summary: When the bodies of several women show up all around LA, it's Garcia who aids the team in making the shocking connection that all of the victims look exactly like one of her favorite actresses, Sloan Hudson. Upon making this discovery, the team soon realizes that this famous celebrity might just be the unsub's final target, meaning that she is now in grave danger and needs to be protected. Unfortunately for Emily, her days of being a profiler are soon put on hold when Hotch assigns her to be Sloan's personal bodyguard.

Warnings: Basically all that an episode of Criminal Minds consists of. I don't really know what to specifically list, but if you have any additions or specific triggers, please let me know

Word Count: 4.6k

“Hollywood is a place where they’ll pay you a thousand dollars for a kiss and fifty cents for your soul.” - Marilyn Monroe

“Good morning, everyone!" The talk show host introduced, directing his words to the huge camera lens a few feet away and the small audience sitting behind it. "We’re here with America’s Sweetheart, Sloan Hudson, daughter of the late world-renowned director and Academy Award-winning actor Omar Hudson, and she’s here to catch us up on how life has been treating her over the past year since her father’s passing.”

On the sofa next to him, Sloan sat with her legs crossed and a dazzling smile plastered on her face as she looked out into the crowd filled with many of her adoring fans and supporters.

“So, Ms. Hudson, first and foremost how are you doing?” He asked, politely.

With a glance at her manager, who stood backstage with a pointed look, Sloan swallowed the lump in her throat and addressed the man next to her.

“Well, Jimmy, I’ll admit things were rough the last several months after my father’s accident. Loss isn’t ever an easy thing to experience, and it was difficult picking myself up from such a dark place in my life. However, I knew the impact he left on this world would never be forgotten and in a way, it’s like he’s still a part of me. Of course, I know firsthand that life and the industry itself won’t ever be the same without him, but it’s that idea alone that has motivated me to continue in his footsteps and keep his legacy alive. He helped shape me into the woman and actress I am today and I will always be grateful and honored to share the same passion he had for acting.”

Once again, she looked over to her manager behind the scenes, who was now sending her a nod of approval, almost as if she had doubted Sloan’s capability to remember the simple words written for her on yellow note cards that morning. Did she honestly forget that reading pages and pages of scripts was part of her job?

“Yes, his death certainly shocked all of us who watched his career develop over the years but we’re glad to hear that the Hudson talent won’t be ending so soon,” Jimmy noted solemnly, allowing the audience to clap in encouragement before he moved on to his next question. “I think we’re all looking forward to seeing your career flourish just as much. Speaking of which, I hear you’ve already begun a new project that’s set to hit theaters as early as next summer. Can you tell us a bit about the film and what we can expect to see from you this time around?”

"Unfortunately, I can’t say much,” Sloan smiled apologetically, knowing she’d get in heaps of trouble for disclosing any details while production was still underway. “But I’m excited to introduce my fans to this new character I’m portraying. She’s nothing like the roles I’ve had in the past and I hope she touches their hearts just as much as she has mine. I know you’re all used to seeing me in romantic indie films and the like, but this one is going to be a real emotional and dramatic performance for me and I’m honored to be part of such a brilliant storyline. I can’t wait to see it come to life.”

“That’s amazing!" He exclaimed. "It sounds like maybe this could be your year to take home an award, what do you think?”

With a small chuckle, Sloan suddenly grew bashful as she hid her face behind her hands, while the crowd cooed and awaited her answer. Truth be told, her anxiety crept up on her like a shadow in the night from his question, but within a second, she managed to ground herself and slip her mask back on before addressing his words.

“Well, it’s like the famous painter Van Gogh once stated: I know nothing with any certainty, but the sight of the stars makes me dream. In that same aspect, I don’t know what the future holds for me or if I’ll ever take home an Oscar. All I can say is that I’ve been dreaming of it ever since I was a little girl sitting in my father's director chair, and that drives me to be the best that I can be. We’ll see if that’s good enough.”

“Ah, Miss Hudson, just as humble as ever, huh?” Jimmy smiled at her. He then turned to face the camera. “When we come back we’ll talk more with Sloan and even play a few games with her that are favorites on the show! I’m sure all of you watching at home don’t want to miss it. So, stay tuned and we’ll be back after a quick commercial break.”

On the way out of the studio, lights flashed and shouts erupted as Sloan and her security team rushed through the crowd of paparazzi, journalists, and fans. Quickly they made their way over to the limousine waiting for her in front of the building, but not before being stopped by a woman with a microphone blocking their path.

“Sloan! Is it true you’re dating your costar, Colton Davis!? Are you engaged to him?? Where is he, and why isn’t he here with you!?”

“Who said he’s not here?” A male’s voice cut in, as the dirty-blond himself emerged from the limo and threw an arm around Sloan’s waist. She had to force herself not to cringe away from his touch as his hand lingered far more downward than she’d liked. “I’m always supporting my girl from the sidelines. Isn’t that right, babe?” He turned to her, leaning down to press a kiss to her lips knowing the press would have a field day with it.

But just as his chapped lips neared her freshly glossed ones, she moved her head so that they met her cheek instead. It was an act of nonchalance executed so perfectly and ritualistically, that no one seemed to notice. They never did, and it was one of the few reasons that made having a PR boyfriend manageable. As long as they were seen out and about together, that was all that mattered. The nonexistent kisses and intimacy could happen behind closed doors and away from the public’s knowledge.

Sloan ignored the rest of the questions thrown at her and blew a kiss to her fans before entering the vehicle, where she finally let out the breath she had been holding in since pulling up to the studio just hours ago. Moments like these were when she was thankful for whoever invented tinted windows, or in her case, the acting shields that allowed her to remove her mask completely without the worry of being seen. It was there that she could let her guard down and wipe away the thick layers of makeup caked on her face consisting of nothing but fake smiles and faux happiness.

She looked over to her manager, Vera, who was currently having what looked to be a serious conversation on the phone. The older woman spared a couple of glances her way, a mixture of worry and skepticism clouding her features, but Sloan couldn’t seem to find enough energy in herself to care. It was probably a modeling gig or another interview that fell through.

Cancellations and rain checks were like the end of the world to Vera, but to her, they were the calm between each passing storm. Moments where she could finally rest and step away from the limelight to have a day or week to herself.

Outside the car, she watched Colton wrap up his goodbyes. His proud demeanor and love for himself amused her to the point where she let out a dry laugh. The people out there didn’t care about him at all, and she knew that. They were all there for her and the only reason they gave him the time of day was so they could find out more information about her life. However, he was too blinded by his new rise in fame to see that.

Deep down, she couldn’t blame him though. When her career first set off, she too enjoyed the love and attention, but over the years she soon recognized it all for what it truly was:

Misconception.

With a roll of her eyes, she sat back in the leather seat and pulled her iPod out of her bag. Within seconds, “Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want” by The Smiths flowed through the earbuds she had placed in her ears. Listening to music was her usual way of grounding herself before getting into character, and knowing she was due on set within the hour, she figured the car ride there would be her only time to do so.

The song choice was deliberate, not only because The Smiths were one of her favorite bands, but also because the lyrics resonated with her in more ways than she knew how to explain. As a celebrity, you’d think she had access to everything she ever wanted. Truthfully, however, that was far from the case. There were many things she wasn’t allowed to have, and those specific things just happened to be what her heart desired most in the world.

“Sloan,” Vera called for her attention, having hung up the phone. “Don’t think I didn’t see that kiss with Cole. If you could even call it that.” She muttered the last part. “Remember what we talked about? You need to sell this relationship to get more publicity, and that won’t happen when you’re giving him the cold shoulder right in front of the cameras.”

“I still don’t see why I need a fake relationship.” She muttered. “I mean, I’m literally in the middle of filming a new movie. Isn’t that enough to warrant publicity?”

“That’s what showbiz is all about, you can’t rely on one single project to keep you trending, you know that. Besides, your fans don’t know anything about this movie aside from the cast. There’s not much keeping their attention. This relationship, however, is the key.” Vera exclaimed. “Haven’t you checked your socials? You and Colton are the hottest new couple, everyone and their mom is shipping you two.”

“I just don’t understand why it had to be him.” She mumbled in reply, looking out the window and watching him take a few photos with fans.

“Look,” Her manager sighed. “I know you’re still upset about our talk last week, but this is for the best. What you were asking me could’ve put you at risk for so much backlash and negativity. You’d lose hundreds if not thousands of supporters and that’s not what’s going to skyrocket your career, Sloan. What the people want from you is to see your face plastered on skincare ads telling them the secret to beauty, or on movie posters for upcoming blockbuster hits. I mean, you’re America’s Sweetheart for a reason. The public loves you, just as you are now. Why change that?”

“Seriously?” Sloan asked in disbelief. “Vera, this is just the kind of thing that could tell me who my true supporters are! I don’t care about the fake fans or what people think of me. People constantly come into my life just to end up taking advantage of me or using me for their own gain anyway and I’m so tired of it. For once, I just want someone to love me for who I am, not some false image that you or anybody else is forcing me to be. Why don’t you get that?”

“Because it’s ridiculous,” Vera answered simply. “We’ve worked too hard to get you where you are in this industry, and I won’t have you throwing it all to waste over some happily ever after fantasy that isn’t necessary when people literally throw themselves at you every day.”

With a scoff, Sloan put her earbuds back in. “You know, contrary to what you may believe, having people constantly throw themselves at you or want something from you doesn’t feel as good as you think it does. It makes trusting people impossible.”

“Sloan, come on–”

“No, Vera.” She cut her off. “I’m done with this conversation. If you want me to keep acting like someone I’m not then I’ll do just that. Luckily, for you, I know how to put on a good show.”

With that, she turned the volume on her iPod up to drown out any other remarks Vera threw at her. That, and also to distract herself from the overwhelming thoughts constantly plaguing her about life and adulation. It was all becoming too much, and Sloan just wanted to remember the passion she once felt for acting again. Lately, it felt like she was putting on this never-ending show for the world and she hated it. She felt used, empty, and hopeless. If she knew pursuing her dreams would end up making her sign her life away, she would have chosen a different route. At least then she would know who she was, because nowadays she felt her true self slipping away from her with each passing day, and it was starting to take its toll.

“Agent Hotchner,” The lead detective, Owen Kim, shook his hand. “I can’t thank you and your team enough for coming all this way to help us out.”

“Of course,” Hotch replied, before turning and introducing his team. “These are Agents Rossi, Morgan, Prentiss, Jareau, and Dr. Reid. Our technical analyst Penelope Garica will also be here this evening to help assist. Where are we so far in finding Kayla Shafer?”

“Well she’s now classified as a missing person, so we have her face plastered on the news and her family has orchestrated a search party of their own.” He answered, solemnly. “We’re doing everything we can but I’m afraid we don’t have much to work on. My officers are heading down to the bus stop area in a few minutes though to see if we can find any working surveillance cameras along the route we think she would normally walk.”

“Great. I’ll have my team set up in the conference room and we’ll go from there.” Hotch spoke formally, watching Detective Kim nod and walk off before JJ slipped into his sight next.

“So, how are we going to approach this?” She asked, quietly, knowing they had to be careful with letting more details about the case reach the media with a celebrity possibly being involved.

Hotch sighed as he looked around the precinct, discreetly. “If Garcia was able to connect the pieces from being a fan of Miss Hudson, sooner or later other fans will too. Our priority right now is to work the case like normal until we hear back from her management team. Until then, I want you to call Garcia and work on putting together a list of all of Sloan’s past roles in chronological order so we have a map to base off of. Hopefully, we’ll learn who the unsub’s next targets might be.”

“Got it.” She gave him a quick nod, before stepping aside to make the call.

Once the rest of the team finished setting up, they equally dispersed in pairs to take care of the respective tasks given to them on the jet. Rossi and Reid headed over to the morgue to examine the other bodies while Prentiss and Morgan followed the LAPD officers to the diner where Kayla worked.

Immediately after walking in, they were hit with the fresh smell of burgers and fries wafting through the air as the bustling breakfast hours quickly turned into lunchtime for many customers. Waiters and waitresses scurried about, taking orders and wiping down counters left and right. Derek just managed to move away from a serving tray filled with plates of food coming his way as the family in the booth next to them got served their meals.

“Looks like we came at the worst possible time’,” He commented, removing his sunglasses and trying to look for someone in charge. Or at least, someone who wasn’t too busy enough to talk with them.

“There’s something so nostalgic about vintage diners.” Emily looked around in awe. “During my college years, I worked at one just like this so I could pay for my apartment. There was a jukebox and everything.”

Derek smirked, “And how’d that work out for you?”

“It sucked.” She dry-panned. “But it did give me a whole new level of respect for waitresses.” She added, just as a woman with ginger hair walked up to them.

“Table for two?” She asked, already picking up menus.

“Oh, no ma'am.” Emily politely declined, as she and Derek held up their badges. “We’re actually with the FBI, here to talk about Kayla Schafer. Did you happen to be working with her the night she went missing?”

“Yeah, we were on the same shift.” The girl answered, whose name tag was revealed to be Julie. “But it's like I told those other cops when they came asking this morning, I clocked out early for my hair appointment so I wasn’t here during closing hours. I don’t know if she left with anyone or not.”

“That’s okay,” Emily assured her. “We’re more interested in the hours you two worked together. Do you remember if there was anyone suspicious hanging around either without ordering anything or maybe even after paying?”

“Perhaps all they ordered was coffee, but they still stuck around for hours anyhow,” Derek added.

“I’m sorry, I don’t.” She shook her head. “As you can see, it gets pretty busy in here. Most days I’m so occupied with running back and forth between tables and the kitchen that my mind is elsewhere. I don’t focus too much on who’s ordering what, you know?”

“I understand.” Emily nodded.

“I really wish I could help, but I have to get back to work,” Julie explained, before reaching into the pocket of her apron. “Here, this was Kayla’s notepad she used to take orders. It might not be much help either but if you’re looking for odd customers maybe there’s something in it you can find. Kayla hasn’t been working here for too long and after an incident that occurred her first day, she’d often make notes about customer appearances to help her remember who ordered what.”

“Thank you.” Derek accepted the small notebook. “Can you tell us more about this incident?”

“Oh, it wasn’t anything major.” She dismissed it with a wave of her hand. “Some woman complained that her food wasn’t right and made a big fuss. Just the normal slip-up with orders. Even the most seasoned of us workers still have those days. I don’t remember it much but if she came back after that day, Kayla’s got it jotted down somewhere in that book.”

“Alright, thank you. We’ll let you get back to work.” Emily replied, nodding before she and Derek walked out into the parking lot.

“You think this has something in it?” Derek asked, flipping quickly through the pages to see quick scribbles of dates, food orders, and vague customer descriptions.

“I’m not sure,” Emily answered honestly. “We’ll let Reid take a look at it though. He’ll be able to read it faster than any of us and point out specific characteristics in the handwriting.”

After Derek agreed, the two of them entered the SUV and drove back to the precinct. Meanwhile, on the other side of town, Rossi and Reid were in the middle of examining the bodies of Jessica Dunnings, Rina Mendes, and Sofia Lombardi.

“The toxicology reports indicated that various traces of poison were found in each of the victims,” Spencer recalled, his hands gloved up as he leaned closer to Rina’s body. “Have you found out what they are yet?”

The M.E. in charge nodded, picking up his clipboard and reading the report. “We found white powdery residue in each of their nasal passageways which the lab identified as cyanide salt, so we believe they inhaled some sort of potassium cyanide prior to their deaths.”

“Most likely how our unsub abducts them,” Rossi noted, standing over the body as well. “They become dizzy, confused, and end up unconscious right there at the scene. Blitz attack.”

“Initially that was all we had discovered,” The examiner continued. “But after closer inspection, we found neurotoxins in the flesh of their hands consistent with aconite and mesaconitine as well.”

“Aconite and mesaconitine,” Spencer repeated, deep in thought as he lifted Rina’s lifeless hands to observe her palms. “The flowers each victim was holding when they were found were purple. I couldn’t get a decent look at the shape of the petals in the files but now after learning that I’m almost certain that it was Aconitum. Also known as wolfsbane.”

“You’d be correct.” He replied, handing Rossi the full report. “Each of them had signs of respiratory distress, which can happen when the neurotoxins of the plant absorb through the skin. It’s why in the crime scene photos there was no blood around the stab wounds. Cardiac arrest is what caused their deaths, the stabbing was inflicted post-mortem.”

“That doesn’t make any sense,” Rossi frowned. “How did the unsub have time to do all this at the disposal site? And what reason did they keep each girl for when there are no signs of torture or assault?”

“That’s another thing,” He went on. “When I checked for defensive wounds, I noticed that all three bodies had their nails neatly trimmed, and their hair was freshly washed. Not only that but their torsos had markings embedded in the skin from around their waist and up towards the chest region. Most likely from a corset or restraint of some sort.”

That piece of news instantly made the two agents look at each other knowingly. Perhaps their original theory of the case relating to Snow White might not be as far off as they thought.

Once the team regrouped at the station and exchanged all of the new information they discovered, by that time Garcia was able to get in contact with Sloan’s management team. Unfortunately, they only had a small window to meet with Vera, but hopefully, it would give them enough time to convince her that Sloan needed to up her security and answer some questions that they had.

To keep things hush, only Hotch, Prentiss, and Morgan went to meet with her, while JJ drove to LAX to pick up Garcia (who was bummed out she wouldn’t be meeting Sloan herself). Spencer, on the other hand, stayed back to look through Kayla’s notebook with Rossi assisting him.

“Always a first for everything,” Emily spoke up, as the three of them pulled into the Hollywood lot location where filming was currently underway. Trailers were set up in rows all around, and crew members roamed about with several large pieces of equipment and props, making it hard for them to find a parking space.

Hotch furrowed his eyebrows as he scanned the lot, “Vera said to meet her in trailer seven, does anyone see it?”

“Over there,” Derek pointed out, motioning to the right.

Hotch nodded and maneuvered the car over in that direction. Finally, after finding an open spot, the three agents stepped out into the blazing heat of Los Angeles and walked over to the trailer.

“I want you two to scope out the trailer as I talk to Vera.” Hotch directed them as they neared the entryway. “Look for any signs of fanmail lying about or over-the-top gifts. If our unsub truly is obsessed with Ms. Hudson they no doubt attempted to contact her more than once.”

“How do we know for sure it isn’t Sloan herself committing these murders?” Derek wondered aloud. “I mean, we agreed that the crime scene photos depicted to be the clean work of a female. It wouldn’t be our first celebrity unsub case like that either. Remember Jonny McHale, the comic-book artist?”

“Let me stop you right there.” A new voice cut into their conversation, making each of them turn their heads.

An older blonde woman stood behind them with her arms crossed, looking at them with a mixture of impatience and skepticism laced in her features.

“Sloan has been working endlessly on this new movie, and in between set hours and resting she has had other bookings to attend to where she’s constantly followed by fans and paparazzi. That girl wouldn’t have time to kill anybody even if she wanted to.” Vera argued, defensively. “Now, I took the time out of my busy day to talk with you agents but I will not stand here and allow you to accuse her of murder. I’m sure you’d run right to the press with it and have it be the headliner for tomorrow’s paper.”

“My apologies, Ma’am,” Derek replied. “I’m just trying to make sure all possibilities are covered.”

The woman scoffed but said nothing as she quickly opened the trailer door and ushered them in before they were seen. After closing the door, she led them to the small living space at the end of the trailer and sat down on one of the cushioned chairs motioning for Hotch to sit on the adjacent one.

“You guys have 20 minutes before the cast is dismissed for the day,” Vera sighed, as she texted away on her cell phone. “What’s this about a bunch of killings related to Sloan?”

Emily fought the urge to roll her eyes at her blatant nonchalance, as Hotch introduced everyone and started diving into the case findings with her. She and Derek, however, took that as their cue to wander around the place looking for clues.

There wasn’t much to the eye besides the luxurious furniture and interior design elements. Still, Emily’s eyes landed on what looked to be a black notebook or journal sitting on the small table in the dinette. It was bound in leather and had gold letters imprinted on the cover that spelled out “HUDSON” in cursive. Inside the journal, she saw a white envelope poking out and wondered if it was fanmail or something more personal.

Though curiosity tempted her to read it, she ultimately decided to leave it be and ask questions later, not wanting to leave a bad impression if Vera had caught her snooping. However, when she averted her gaze over to the counter across the way, what she saw next certainly piqued her interest even more. A fresh bouquet of purple flowers rested in a vase by the sink, with the gifting tag still attached to it.

At the sight, Emily walked over and picked up the tag with her glove, but unfortunately, no name was listed. It was completely blank. She was about to call out to Vera and ask if she knew who delivered them but before she could, the trailer door creaked open, and Sloan herself emerged from outside with a look of surprise.

Emily’s breath nearly caught in her throat when she locked eyes with the young actress standing just a few feet away. Instantly, she was hit with flashbacks from the night before when she was watching one of Sloan’s movies with JJ and Garcia. Yet, Emily couldn’t remember a single scene that did the girl justice in terms of her beauty and physical essence. For one thing, her eyes seemed much more warm and vibrant in person. Whatever filters and color editing were added in the film completely dimmed the natural glow radiating behind her false lashes. She could only describe them as golden pools of honey hypnotizing her in the very spot she stood. Unable to look away, all she could do was stare in a trance as Sloan studied her back with furrowed eyebrows.

Though her presence was quite alluring, Emily was soon brought back to reality by the repellent attitude in Sloan’s voice as she slammed the trailer door closed behind her.

“Who the hell are you?”

A/N: hope you liked this chapter! drop a comment and let me know your thoughts if you enjoyed :) also let me know if you want to be tagged whenever a new chapter is posted! thanks for reading <3

[chemicallady]

Everybody's fool

Couple: Johnny RottenxReader

Content Warning: cursing, plus I can't really speak British english so apologies if I americanised some dialogues c.c please forgive me

Summary: It's not true that no one have nothing lovely to write about him.

••••

It's seems like years since the last time you heard about John. To be fair, it's just five days but it seems to be a lifetime. He is currently touring in US with the Pistols and actually the only knowledge you have about this are the complains he made in the quick phone calls he has granted you by divine grace.

Complains about Malcom being a prick and that's not a big news, by the way. You hate the guy since you met him. Viv is too much worthy for a worm like he is.

Complains about the american audience that is getting more and more violent towards them. Knowing that those people hate the band and their iconic message to new generations scares the shit out of you, by the way. John was so amused while he was telling us about a priest that had yelled to him that he wants to crucify Rotten. Not. Funny. At. All.

Complains about Sid being too annoying. Again, not a surprise at all. Sid is the most damaged person you have ever seen. Able to be the sweetest boy in the room but ready to cut his hand if nobody is paying attention to him. Or start a riot that could cost everything to the band.

Complains about Nancy, even if she is not with then. You can say nothing about this topic in particular, you hate that junkie, she is ruining Sid or that's what it seems. You love Sid too much to see how toxic he is as a boyfriend.

Complains on Steve and Paul.

On the bustour.

On the hotels.

On everything.

He talks about everything but you.

He has never asked about you. Do you have find a new job, (y/n)? Are you doing, (y/n)? Do you miss me?

Nothing. Nada. Niet.

To clear the waters, your relationship with John Lyndon is everything but intelligible. You love the shit out that lame ass and he cares about you enough to give you his attention, his body, his time.

But... you have never felt like you are enough for him and that's interesting because everyone's love you as much as they don't really like him. You are a supporter since the very beginning. You met all of them working at Viv shop and you already knew Sid from years. And of course John too.

You have spent the last three years of your life waiting for John to come 'home'. No matter how many times he pretendented that you didn't shag. He is always showing you that it's worthy to wait. He is not into PDA but he gently caresses you hand or your back through the texture of the leather jacket when he is unseen.

And you too have always shown that you you have always raised him above everyone else.

Jesus, you got yourself fired because you got an argument with Malcom about Rotten. Your friends started to keep the distance when John became McLauren target.

As Glenn before.

However, you have to face it. People to John are like clothes. He changes them depending by his bloody mood.

Probably due to his behavior, John knows he is the heart and soul of the band. His lyrics are the sparks of the revolution, not Steve and his incapacity of playing a guitar and take is own decisions.

So you don't think about him when a knock at the door brings you back from your thoughts. You leave the cup of tea on the table near to the window, on a daily glimpse on Baxton.

Opening the door you feel nothing but astonishment.

《 John?》

《You are acting like a ghost just manifested on your door. 》

《 I feel exactly like I'm looking at a ghost 》

He is soaked in rain, but his big eyes are even more wetty. Not like he cried, but like he is awake since days.

You move so he can enter in your small attic flat, deciding to not ask. When he will be ready, he will speak. He never shuts up, he won't this time, you know.

《 You mind prepare some tea?》

《Just one second, wild boy. You are washing my floor like a mop.》

Using a towel, you stroke his foxy hair till they are almost drier.

《 You have left some closets on my wardrobe. Change yourself before catching a cold.》

You move to the kitchen, leaving John the time to make himself at home. You can tell how much he is in distress; his body is tense and he keeps rubbing his hands.

By the time you have settled the table with cups and a metal box full of biscuits, he reaches you. You try to not look at him while he sits, grabbing a cinnamon biscuit.

《Lemon or mint tea?》

《I left the band. I'm no longer a Pistol, so what doesn't it matter if my fucking tea is mint or bloody lemon? 》

It has always amazed you the way John is able to leave you speechless. And it has always destroyed you the way he has simply left you behind. But now...

Now it's different.

You feel a void in the middle of the chest and for several seconds, the only sound you hear is the teapot whistle.

In front of you, John looks so small, bent over himself, stooped. He avoids your glaze, starring at the window without really watching through the glass.

Bringing the hot water on the table, you realise that is not the first time he seems so helpless. This is John Lyndon. Rotten is just a angry boy on a big stage, but John.... John is powerless since the very beginning of your 'relationship'.

You spill a cup of hot water for him, hand him a couple of teabags so he can choose by himself.

《 Is Malcom's fault, right?》

《 Steve's. I ask him to choose and he did it unwisely. I wasn't aspecting much from that moron. He is not able to choose his socks, how can he choose what's the best for the band?》

That's insane.

《Where is Sid?》

《He decided to stay.》

《.... No fucking way.》

《Steve convinced him. He's the new singer of the band.》 He ended with a sarcasting voice. John pours some milk in his lemon tea, adding a sugar lump.

《 I can't believe he didn't leave with you.》

《He was in hospital in New York when I left.》 Even if he tries to be fearless you can see how upset he gets thinking about Sid. Upset and sad. 《He is not able to take care of himself and he ODed before the end of the tour. Pathetic. 》

《You don't think this. He is your mate since I can recall. He is a good lad and-》

《We're not going to see him again alive, (y/n).》

That's too much for you. It was so perfect, seeing them on the stage toghter, fearless and strong, singing an anthem against the contemporary distopic society.

But now it's just a dream and you were wake up roughly.

《I'm sorry, John.》

《 About Sid? He never mentioned you while we were together》

《 I'm sorry for the band》.

John rises his eyes in yours, surprised.

《Why?》

《Because without you they're done. Doesn't matter if Steve founded the band. You wrote every song. The singer is the face and soul of a band. Pistols are not an exception. Steve is clueless, Paul is not carismatic and Sid ... I love him and I don't care if he never mentioned me in months. He is like a brother to me, but he can't play and for sure he can't sing or write.》

A small smile appears on John's lips, full of self steam. 《You think they can't replace me, though 》

And you can't help but smile back. 《No, they can't.》

The tea is getting cold, so the two of you spend a couple of minutes to drink it. He changed his clothes with the ones he had left in your wardrobe. A whiye baggy old t-shirt and a pair of skinny jeans made by Viv.

He is cute, whit is hair still wet and that insicure but warm smile.

《Do you figure out why I came here?》

When he asks, the first thing you have in your mind is "because you have nothing left", but you don't have the heart to tell him.

《You missed me?》 You decide to ask back, with a witty tune. You don't want to hear a negative answer, but you aspect one.

《Because I was left with nothing》 he whispers, stopping you from breathing. 《But you. And I love you, so it is okay. I can make another band, without that prick manager, I can find another mate. But.... you are the only person that it can't be replaced. Not to me. 》

Before thinking, you stand. Your lips reach John's ones in a spontaneous and passionate kiss. Now that tears you hold are stream on your checks.

《I love you too》, you say. 《And you are impossible to replace as well. We'll figure out together.》

[lustfangs]

To be or not to be, that is the question.

Or, well, the real question is whether you would enjoy being a stress relief toy for a bunch actors and/or reenactors over the course of a long day of work - each time they exit the stage or get knocked out of a round, they put a round of their own in your mouth. Each time they're waiting to come on, they slap your pussy until you're weeping for more, but never get it. Heaven forbid they win, or speak their final lines on stage; then they plough your ass, fast and hard and painful as you blubber amorously through a fucked-out mouth full of cum. Each time a minor role or an announcer passes, they fingerfuck you to completion, which gets swifter and swifter as the day goes on. By 3pm, you cum practically the moment anyone touches you, yet whine needily for more.

Once it's all over, and the audience has gone home, everyone strips and finally, blessedly, pumps your pussy so full of raw-dogged, hot, seeping cum that you can't even walk out of there before falling asleep on the floor, brains fucked clear out of your head.

And then you wake up tomorrow, belly still sloshing with seed, except they're all back for a second day of performance, and you're back on stress management duty.

I take my job seriously too. I show up in the skimpiest, easy access clothes so that no one has to waste time on their short breaks.

Thinking of two waiting for their turn to go on stage. One holding my legs spread open while the other slaps and spits on my pussy. My clit is all puffy and I’ve cried so much my face has gotten swollen, but that’s only encouraged them. They leave me behind for the minor roles to overstimulate me to no ends.

When they come back they grab a fistful of my hair and fuck my mouth while my pussy clenches around air until they cum. I’m forced to swallow it all. Some of them are more sadistic and like to watch me whine and beg instead and so they prefer to cum all over my body. When someone’s spoken their final words on stage they can finally fuck me properly. They didn’t want to get their outfits dirtied before. I’m too messy to be counted on not to ruin anything either.

There’s nothing more fun than the meaner ones too. They’re the ones who laugh at my state, who slap my cunt and say that they’re so glad the company found such a good-for-one-thing cum dump to help with the stress of the job. At the end of the work day , they’re the ones orchestrating everything too.

[gmariam19]

I posted the shouty fic! :) It's called A New Beginning.

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply Category: M/M Fandom: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy Relationship: Poe Dameron/Finn Characters: Poe Dameron, Finn (Star Wars) Additional Tags: Arguing, Anger, shouting, First Kiss, POV Poe Dameron, Poe Dameron Needs A Hug, Hopeful Ending Word Count: 3425

Longer excerpt below - now what to work on next?? Enjoy and thank you for reading! :)

The meeting ends, and everyone slowly files out of the new command center. Except Finn. Finn, who had missed the holo-call with the representative from Akiva. Finn, who looks both apologetic and apprehensive. Finn, who Poe misses so much but can’t bear to look at right now, because he is so close to the tipping point. He begins gathering his things, waiting for Finn to speak first, half hoping he doesn’t.

“Look, Poe, I’m sorry,” Finn starts. He’s said that a lot lately. He’s been working hard, Poe knows that. They all have. Finn is learning about the Force, he’s helping Jannah’s company settle former troopers still surrendering across the galaxy, and he’s trying to be the co-general he said he would be. Only he’s gone more than he’s not, and Poe is usually a general on his own. He misses those first heady days and weeks when they really did lead together, make decisions together. Celebrate every small victory together. He sighs, his earlier anger dissipating into the smothering disappointment he feels most of the time now.

“It’s fine.” Poe turns away, sensing that Finn wants to say more, but Poe would rather avoid the confrontation that’s been brewing for weeks. “But I’m tired, so I’m going to turn in. Big meeting coming up.” He didn’t want to go to Akiva to help set up a peacekeeping force, but perhaps it would be good to get away, and at least he could see Wedge and Nora.

“Wait,” Finn says, and Poe can hear the other man’s frustration, which only adds to his own. Finn is standing in the middle of the room, his shoulders tense, his eyes uncertain. “I want to talk. We need to talk.”

“We?” Poe echoes, turning around with an air of exasperation. He’s been having an even harder time than usual controlling his quick-trigger responses, at least when it comes to this. To Finn. “What do we need to talk about?”

“We need to talk about this trip to Akiva, for one,” Finn replies. “But mostly about us. Why this is happening.” He motions between them. “Why we barely talk, why you’re always so mad at me, why—”

“The trip was already discussed at the meeting you missed. And we don’t talk because you’re not around.” Poe is blunt. Maybe it’s not the whole truth, but it’s the biggest part of it. Finn is simply not there anymore. “That’s why. And I’m not mad, Finn. I’m tired. Literally and figuratively, in every sense of the word.” He’s more disappointed than angry, because this wasn’t how it was supposed to be, after the war.

Finn narrows his eyes, shakes his head. “Look, I’m know I’ve been busy, but you have too—”

“I’ve been doing my job,” Poe snaps. “The one I inherited three months ago when Leia died. The one I thought you were going to be a part of, that we were going to do together.” He wasn’t going to go there, but now that he has, maybe it will help him with the deep resentment that has been building for weeks as they drift farther and farther apart. Maybe he should have said something a long time ago.

“I am!” Finn exclaims. “I am a part of it.”

“Doesn’t feel like it. You’ve spent the last three months doing more Jedi training, more trooper support, than—you know, It’s fine.” Poe waves it away. He suddenly doesn’t want to get into it anymore, it’s too much. Easier to bottle it up, like he has been. “We’ve managed, so let’s just forget about it. I’ve got to get ready for Akiva.” The unspoken alone hangs in the air between them.

The look on Finn’s face is confusion crossed with hurt, which doesn’t do anything to lessen Poe’s frustration. What doesn’t the other man understand? Poe has been handling almost everything on his own while Finn trains and travels and occasionally checks in. Finn missed the entire meeting on the upcoming peacekeeping mission to Akiva, when Poe had expected him to be there. Of course Poe is upset. Then Finn opens his mouth and throws guilt into Poe’s mix of complicated and overwhelming emotions.

“You said you were happy for me,” he says quietly. “That you understood—why I wanted to learn about the Force, why I wanted to work with Jannah. You said you were proud.”

“I was,” Poe says, and Finn’s face falls. Misstep, and Poe feels bad, he does. No matter what he may be going through, Poe doesn’t want to lash out and hurt Finn. “I am—although sometimes it’s hard. Finn, I do understand, but understanding doesn’t make it any easier when half the galaxy is still putting out the fires of the First Order and the other half is riding my ass about what happens next! I’m tired!”

“You keep saying that,” Finn points out. “But I think you mean something else.”

“No, I mean it,” Poe replies, and he runs a hand across his eyes, through his hair. He is bone-deep tired, but Finn is also right. There are so many other things he means every time he says it that sometimes he’s not sure which one he’s referring too. So he sticks with the literal. “And Kalonia’s got the numbers to prove it.”

“What?” Finn asks sharply, with clear alarm, eyes piercing Poe’s face. “What do you mean, the numbers?”

“The number of times she’s been on me to eat more, drink more, take better care of myself.” Poe shrugs. “The number of times she’s told me to take a break, or had to—” He stops, not wanting to share everything, not anymore. It hurts, because there was a time when he would have told Finn how he couldn’t sleep, didn’t feel like eating, was tired and angry all the time. Kalonia hadn’t said it, but Poe knew part of it was the let-down from the fighting, his mind and body finally catching up to all that had happened over the last year. The rest is the reality of the present. He holds up a hand when Finn starts to speak. “I told you, I really am tired. And now I have this thing on Akiva. But more than that, I’m tired…of this.” He motions between them, around them.

“What the hell does that mean?” Finn demands. “You’re tired of me? Of us? Of what? I’m not trying to stick you with everything, Poe. I can go to Akiva with you. I’m trying to—”

“You’re trying to do everything you can, for the Resistance,” Poe replies bitterly. “I get it. I’ve done the exact same thing.” He leaves out the part about Leia calling him out on it; it seems he’s doomed to follow in her footsteps in more ways than one.

“But it’s not enough, that’s it? I bust my ass out there, run training courses in the dark, hitting six planets a week to help these troopers, and just because I wasn’t here for a holo-call, you’re pissed?”

“Kriff, Finn—it’s more than missing the damn holo-call!” Poe can’t help raising his voice.

“Then explain it to me!” Finn shouts at him. “Fine!” Poe yells right back, taking a step forward, his hands bunched into fists at his side. “I’m tired of this,” he starts, gesturing around him. “I’m tired of doing this all by myself when I thought you would be by my side so we could do it together. I’m tired of senators, of First Order remnants, of the Hutts, of the lack of funds and the lack of planning and the lack of progress.” He’s shouting now, pouring his anger into it. “I’m tired of feeling like I’m never good enough, like nothing I do matters because no one ever says it does, and hell if I can tell whether or not defeating the First Order made a damn bit of difference when the galaxy is still a kriffing mess!”

“You don’t mean that—” Finn starts, and Poe cuts him off again.

“I didn’t think it would be like this, Finn.” He shakes his head and lowers his voice. “And I’m tired of us—what we’ve become. Of never seeing you, of never knowing if you’ll be there or not. I’m tired of waiting, and watching, and wanting. I’m tired of being alone.”

Link to AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/55016890

[luc1ferx0]

A Harmonious Serenade

JiU x GN! Reader | Fluff | Warnings: None

"Stop stressing about the music recital, you'll do great, like you always do!" JiU stated.

"I can't help it, darling. I've worked so hard to get here that I do not want to screw this up." Y/N said as they put the sheet music down in front of them.

JiU noticed their tense expression as they studied the notes carefully, she sighed at the sight.

"Ever the perfectionist, are you?" JiU spoke with a smile. She hugged Y/N from behind, placing a kiss on their cheek before looking into their eyes with nothing but sincerity as she spoke "You'll do great. You always do. Nothing in this world can stop you now. You've constantly picked yourself up off the ground and worked your butt off just to fulfill your dreams, and here you are. You are a talented soul and you deserve to be heard, whether you mess up or not. One mistake does not erase all the talent you have."

At her words, Y/N smiled and leaned in to her touch.

JiU always had a calming aura around her that Y/N loved. JiU brought the peace needed in Y/N's studio whenever they played the piano.

JiU's presence alone was enough to calm Y/N down, and she was happy to be there for Y/N whenever they needed her.

"I love you."

"I love you too, my dear."

The day of the recital was the day you were excited for, yet also dreaded.

The energy that ran through the backstage didn't seem to help with the nerves. Everyone was running around, transferring things or people from one place to another, either speaking calmly or yelling. This was indeed no place that Y/N could take a breather at, so they retreated to the waiting room.

"SURPRISE!" Y/N heard the familiar voice of the girl they so loved.

Y/N immediately hugged JiU, trying so hard to calm down.

"Woah, what's wrong, darling? What is it?" JiU asked, as she cupped your face and looked you in the eye with worry in hers.

"Everything's so hectic, you know how I have to be completely relaxed in order to complete a piece, right? The energy outside isn't exactly helping. What if I get anxious right before I have to be pulled on stage and I mess up? I don't want to mess up! I practiced day and night for this, and I-" JiU placed a finger on Y/N's lips, silencing them.

"Baby, when you get anxious, just look at me, or squeeze my hand before you go on stage. I'll be here for you, okay? So, don't be anxious." JiU said as she leaned her forehead against yours. "You'll do a great job. The piece has basically became muscle memory for you at this point. You might even be able to play the whole piece without having to look at the notes nor the keys. You'll do great out there." You smiled at your girlfriend. She always knew the right words to say to calm you down.

She got on her tiptoes and placed a gentle kiss on your lips. As she pulled away, she held your hands in hers and walked you back outside.

The energy of the backstage began to affect you again, and just as you were about to go back in the waiting room, JiU pulled you into a hug and squeezed you tightly.

"Y/N, you're up in 5 minutes." Said one of the staff.

JiU pulled away to give you a smile "You can do this."

You squeezed her hand before nervously walking on stage. The spotlight greeted you once you hit the stage and so did the numerous faces of the people in the audience.

You took a quick bow before sitting yourself in front of the piano.

Looking at the notes in front of you, you felt overwhelmed. Your heart began to race as you positioned your hands. Doubts began to fill your mind as your hands started to play the piano in front of you.

You began overthinking "Is this the right note? Am I reading this right? Is my sweating obvious? Is my nervousness obvious? Did I just make a mistake?!"

Suddenly, just as you were about to stop playing and get up and leave without finishing the piece, your eyes met JiU's who was looking at you with a proud expression. Her hands were clasped together tightly as her eyes remained on you.

There was a spark in her eyes as she admired the melody you created from the piano. Her smile only grew when she noticed you visibly relaxing as you continued the piece.

In that moment, it felt like it was just the two of you in this auditorium. It felt as if you were playing a love song specifically created for the woman whose presence made you forget about everyone else in the room. It felt as if you were serenading her with a classic love song like "Can't Help Falling In Love With You" by Elvis Presley or "Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You" by Frankie Valli, which all speak the truth of your love for JiU.

It was a slow burn, but you always had your eyes on each other from the start. You both never wanted anyone else but each other. You knew that the ending of that slow burn would be a satisfying confession in which the two would kiss and everyone would rejoice as the story ended.

Right now was either the sequel or the story after. However, you felt as if your slow burn didn't need a sequel as no one could get in the way of the love you both felt for each other. It was the story after that, that was never told because it was known from the start that the stars aligned in your favor, fate decided that you two belonged together, and therefore, could never be broken apart.

You two felt your hearts connect through the music that flooded the air.

You didn't even notice the looks of awe the audience was giving as you stared at what seemed like nothing as you played the piano.

How could one be this talented?

You didn't know how you did it as well.

All you knew was JiU, the woman that you devoted every piece of music you either played or made.

No.

Not JiU.

Min Ji. Kim Min Ji.

[thebigshotman]

*…WELL. I SUPPOSE THAT IS ALL OF THE TIME WE HAVE TO INTERACT WITH THE PAST FOR THE TIME BEING. I AM SURE MORE OPPORTUNITIES TO DO SO WILL PRESENT THEMSELVES…HOWEVER, MY HOLD ON THE RIFF GROWS THIN.

*I TRUST ALL OF YOU HAVE SAID EVERYTHING THAT YOU WANTED TO HIM…AND SEEN HOW BETTER OFF HE WAS BACK THEN, TOO. YOUR ATTACHMENT AS AN AUDIENCE TO A BROKEN PUPPET FASCINATES ME. TRULY.

*BUT NEVER MIND THAT FOR NOW. IN THE MEANTIME, I SHALL TAKE MY LEAVE BACK TO…ELSEWHERE, SHALL WE SAY. WE WILL MEET AGAIN SOON. FAREWELL FOR NOW.

The connection to the past is severed, the image of a rattled but still somewhat confident Spamton fading from view in a glitching swirl of purple, pink, and yellow. Through it all, distorted fragments of time stick out audibly as you are gradually returned to the present.

*Thank you!! Thank you, everyone…I’m thrilled to have been rated the number one salesman this past year!! I’d like to thank…thank…

*W-What? Don’t get cocky?? Mike, I think I can afford to be a little cocky right now-

*…Huh? Arguing with someone on the p-phone? T-Trust me, you were mishearing things! Everything’s [[100% certified]]…I-I mean, fine…what the hell was that?

*…Please. I don’t know if you can [[F1]]-Help, me, but…a Lightner made you, right? I don’t know what else to do…

*You “understand what I’m going through”?! No you don’t, ‘Delia!! Your success has never been hung on teeny tiny little [[$5.99 door hinges]] that could fall apart at any moment!! …Please, leave me alone for now. I just need to call him back…

*…Huh? What’s this little thing doing in here? Looks like…some kind of jewel…

*Mike. I know you’re there. I saw something. I saw Heaven. How do I get there?! How do I get back everything and keep my-

*WHAT [[store-wide savings are happening now!]] T0 M3?!?

*H-EY HEY, SWA[[Easels]]…IT’S…ME!! YOUR [friend request-] FRIEND, SPAMTON!! LISTEN-

*SWATCH, [[don’t leave me here!]]!!! MANAGER, QUEEN, [anyone…]!!! I’m burning!! Don’t let me—

*HA…HA…HAEAHEAHEAHEHAEHAEHAE!!! 1’LL GET THERE ONE DAY!!! I’LL G3T THAT [workout ready body] AND GET TO [Heaven] 4ND THEY’LL ALL [[you’ll be sorry~]]!!! TH3Y’LL SEE I’M ST1LL A [[BIG SHOT]]!!!! JU$T U WAIT…

There’s another manic, sped up cackle, much more like the ones you’re accustomed to, before everything goes silent and dark. And then…

The roof’s finally finished loading, separating himself from that always dark sky he hates so much. Although, lately it’s seemed just a little less oppressive. All that’s left is for the rest of the store in fix itself. Considering ruined shelves are still clipping against the ground like that were just destroyed, that could take a while…

*…[Hazelnut] HASN’T [stop on by!] T0DAY…SHE 4LWAYS DOES ON HER WAY [[homes outside the city]]…

Despite that disquieting thought, Spamton G. Spamton-occasionally known as “Spaul”-doesn’t move from the spot behind his desk. He’s back to being the broken, plastic puppet that’s familiar to you, with a glitchy voice that’s unable to properly form coherent sentences. His wide smile seems a little strained, though, and his glasses have a certain glimmer to them. He’s not moving-because what would it look like if he showed up to her job unexpectedly?-but is absolutely concerned for her.

That’s when a headache inducing pulse of garbage noise, static, and memories pangs through his head suddenly, making him throttle backwards with an uncomfortable glitch and onto the floor as a result. Knocking his systems offline as they process whatever just happened for just long enough for a certain someone to speak through him.

*…Is anyone listening? If you can hear me, please, help-

The static is forcefully booted out of his systems, and he jolts upright while rubbing his head. Everything’s fine-well, relatively, anyway-but there’s something just a little different. In his head, in his memories. A certain section of the garbage and out of tune nonsense has cleared, and it’s as if a few cherry picked moments from his past, from his height as a big shot, happened only a day ago…

He weakly turns to the audience, squinted marbles appearing in his glasses as he points at them.

*…WH4T DID YOU [[chaos enjoyers]] 0F AN [studio audience] DO TH1S TIME…??

[thelaundrybitch]

Little Blue Hearts Update - Chapter 30

Aloha my Turtle Doves 😍😘

Please excuse my brief absence with your update.

We've been kinda crazy over here recently.

That and my laptop half shit the bed. BUT no fear! I got my new one already 😂

Chapter 30 brings us a new character! and some interesting new insights.

I'm not sure I will be able to update this coming week, as I will be bringing my family into Boston so my husband can take his civics exam 🙌🎉

18+ content - for mature audiences only!

Reblogs only, please!

Little Blue Hearts cover art by the lovely @leosgirl82

The New Girl

~Donatello~

It's always the same.  

I've been having the same dream every night for a couple of weeks now. 

The eerie, apocalyptic looking town. 

The burned house. 

The beautiful brunette in the attic.

Why are we there? What do we need to do? Why is she injured? Is she a real person? Is she in trouble? Where is there? Why do I always wake up before I can ask her anything?

It's frustrating. 

And a bit creepy.

And I need to know what's behind that metal door on the third floor.

But, the more I think about the dream, and analyze it, the more I can't help but realize that somewhere in my subconscious, I am feeling horribly guilty about what happened with Liv. 

And for not realizing that Leo has been in love with her longer than I have.

Dad has me meditating and journaling at least three times a day. He asks constantly if I've had any breakthroughs during the meditation. But I haven't. And I feel like I'm failing him.

I admit though, working with Dad has made it much easier to work through and get over my feelings for Liv. 

Wait. Let me rephrase that.

I'm not over her.

I love her. And I don't think that will ever change.

I'm just working on the type of love I feel for her.

I was in love with her. My heart felt it. The heartbreak I felt was the real deal. As real as when April left. 

Turning inward during these therapeutic meditation sessions has made me realize that my love for her didn't come from a healthy place. I had become obsessed. I sexualized her, and I'm ashamed of that. She was seemingly everything I wanted, because she was everything April wasn't. Yea, the stories Ashley told were great, but it wasn't until knowing her intimately through my stalker-level research, that I decided I wanted her to be mine. 

And that's never ok.

Leo, on the other hand...

He loved her character. Her morals. Her personality.

He didn't even care what she looked like.

He wanted her heart for the right reasons.

He deserves to be with her. She's a good woman.

And I went and screwed everything up. Like, royally.

After the whole guestroom fiasco, and the anxiety attack she experienced, poor Liv has been struggling - in and out of consciousness - for the past twelve weeks. Mostly out. She hit her head hard on the stone floor.

Ashley had been able to get her up and out of bed for the most part, at first. But there came a point where we couldn't wake her up for about 24 hours. Ashley had to bring a doctor down to make sure she was going to be alright.

We also had to contact Liv's Mom, and her workplace. Thank goodness for Michelle, seriously. She has been amazing with Liv. She's taking care of all the legalities with paperwork to get Liv FMLA, and to ensure she doesn't lose her job at the hotel.

Speaking of Michelle, she's been a Godsend with Dad, too. And Raph is finally feeling like he can ease up in the caretaker role he'd taken upon himself. 

It's honestly really nice to have Michelle here. 

And she's here a lot. 

She's here so often, she may as well move in with us at this point. Which I'm totally grateful for because she brings this amazing positivity down here, spreading it like wildfire, and helping everyone's heart heal a little more each time she smiles. We were a disaster before she got here.

Mostly, she's with Liv when she's not at work, giving Leo a break. Or, I should say, demanding Leo take a break. My poor brother is an absolute wreck. Raph even banned him from patrols because he can't maintain focus.

When she's not with Liv, she spends her time with Dad. She's so interested in everything he does. His plants, the healing oils, the tea making. And Dad ADORES her. I'm pretty sure if she ever tries to leave, he's gonna chain her to the lair.

But I don't see that being an issue. 

Because I see her side-glancing Big Red.

And Raph has heart eyes going on for her.

And we all see it. Aside from the pair of them.

It's funny, the big doof is the most confident man in the world with any female you throw in front of him. It doesn't matter their looks, personality, or status. Lets just say, he knows how to sell ice cubes to an Eskimo, and then have them come back, begging for more.

Then?

Enter Michelle, who is genuinely kind, helpful, and attentive to Dad, and Raph's tongue atrophies and his brain turns to mush.

It's quite entertaining, actually.

So, he keeps to himself. And poor Michelle thinks he's not a fan of her presence.

*knock, knock, knock*

"Come in," I say, putting my glasses back on my face and placing my pencil next to my journal.

"Hey," says Michelle softly as she enters my bedroom, crossing her arms in front of her and leaning up against the wall by my door.

"Hey," I respond with a sigh. "How's she doing?" 

"Her vitals are good. She's been talking in her sleep since last night, so I feel like that's a step in the right direction," she tells me, giving me an update on Liv.

I've confided in her a lot. She knows everything. Even the weird dreams I've been having for the last couple of weeks.

She's become my safe space.

"That's good," I tell her.

"How are you sleeping?" She inquires, concern showing in her furrowed brow.

"The same," I say, "I always seem to get to the same point, and wake up. Although this last time she was injured."

"Injured?" Michelle says, slightly alarmed by this new development.

"Yea, she had a gash along her hairline, and on the palm of her hand, and cuts and bruising on at least one of her wrists," I continue. "Truthfully, I think I'm just upset about the whole incident with Liv, and it's just coming out as these weird nightmarish dreams."

"I don't know Don. You're finally taking care of yourself and meditating. What if the meditation has opened your mind to the universe? What if there's something more to it?" She asks. "I mean, you guys have mutagen flowing through your bloodstream. I wouldn't be surprised if you have other... Gifts," she says.

I shrug. "Well, until you can find the science on telepathy during sleep, I'm gonna go with guilt," I say, looking at her with a smirk.

She sticks her tongue out at me and shrugs me off.

"I came to see if you want to join us for dinner. Mike made Chicken Cordon Bleu with mashed potatoes and fresh cut green beans. It smells delicious," she says.

"It is delicious, and yes, I absolutely want to join," I say with a smile.

As I stand and stretch, the door busts open, Ashley's eyes are wide open and sparkling with tears.

"She's awake!" She exclaims.

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