#watching while i drink my morning (its 12 pm) coffee

[nukihowlter]

dnp pizza mukbang is stronger than any party drug u could ever give me

[spontaneousmusicalnumber]

The issue: I have little energy for housework after I get home from work.

Observation the first: When I have a coffee around 9am, I crash hard and want to fall asleep around 2pm.

Observation the second: Before I crash hard, I am miraculously productive and energetic.

Observation the third: Most of my caffeine intake is in the very dilute form of Diet Pepsi (~3 mg/oz). I very rarely drink coffee (average 12 mg/oz) and never take more than a few sips of an energy drink (avg 10-20 mg/oz).

Hypothesis: Drinking coffee upon getting home from work (usually between 4:30 and 5 pm) will give me energy to do household tasks I normally cannot, and allow me to fall asleep by my normal bedtime of 11:00.

Methodology: I shotgunned one 8-oz can of room temperature Twix flavored coffee drink (between 60-80 mg caffiene) at roughly 5:30 pm after impulse buying a 12-pack at Sam's Club.

Observations until time of posting:

I portioned and froze everything else I bought in bulk immediately after dinner. Usually after dinner, I sit on the couch and scroll social media.

As scheduled, I hosted the usual weekly anime club. This week, while watching the show, I made significant progress on a weaving project. This is not necessarily out of the ordinary, as I had begun it the evening previously and had been excited to continue.

The first yawn has been recorded around 10:30 pm.

Potential complications:

If this caffeine crash does not happen as predicted, an important day at work tomorrow will fucking suck.

I have a tendency to get migraines if I do not have enough caffeine. In the long term, heightening my caffeine dependency may prove detrimental in the side effects of its absence.

Current course of action: it is now nearing 11 pm and I will attempt to go to sleep.

I will return for more observations in the morning.

[lewdbabies]

~The neighbor ~

part 2

nanami kentox reader smut

warning: MDNI, 18+, Raw sex , praising kink, Language, Rough sex, Breeding, smut

Part 2

Work was slow as usual, after morning hours the cafe tends to slow down lunch and dinner were served but it wasn’t very popular. Judging by the way Nanami was in a rush earlier it seemed he didn’t have time to stop by for his regular Black coffee. You lean against the register catching up on the latest novel you’d been reading. Your boss is in the back doing “Inventory “ which really meant taking a nap in the office. You glance at the clock perched on the wall, 1:30 pm, you sigh time was dragging on today. You turn your attention back onto your book engrossing yourself in the literature.

“Hello may I see the lunch menu please”

You jump.

You’d been so enraptured by your book you hadn’t even heard the door bell ring.

“Y-yes W-welcome let me grab that for you one second” you slam your book shut and quickly squat down grabbing a laminated lunch menu.

You look up and you’re met with brown eyes.

He smiles grabbing the menu, your hands brush lightly. You’re panicking, this is the first time he’s ever came to the cafe for lunch. He nods walking to A booth furthest from the entrance, you watch in awe admiring his physic. You grab a towel and begin to buss tables giving him time to decide what he wanted. Your eyes keep darting over at him blushing every Time your eyes meet. He doesn’t seem to mind he gives you a small smile in response.

After a while you walk to the register to grab your note pad and pen. You reach in your pocket for your lip gloss dabbing some on before making your way over to his table. He’s looking down, his brows scrunched in focus.

“Is anything looking good” you call out cheerfully.

“Yes you are” his tongue slides across his lips.

“Pardon?” You asked unsure of what you heard.

“I said yes it is” he rubs his chin staring directly into your eyes.

You ignore it deciding you’re just hearing things, He points to a item on the menu.

“This will be fine “ he states.

“The eggs Benedict, Alright and for your drink?” You scribble on your note pad.

“Black coffee should suffice” he nods to himself in approval.

“Alrighty I will have that right up” you rip the paper from your pad and start towards the kitchen.

“Order up!” You call back, sticking the ticket up.

You were in charge of making all the coffee related orders, came with being a barista/cashier. You didn’t mind though, you learned to Create lots of different foam patterns. Coffee making was fun if you made it, you even created a couple secrete menu items of your own.

You reach for a mug, pouring the freshly brewed coffee inside, steam swirls from the cup. You set the mug ontop of your silver serving tray and make your way back to his table. He’s looking through a stack of papers, his briefcase sits open on the table top.

“Here’s your coffee” you grab the glass in an attempt to hand it to him unaware of how hot it is. The glass burns your hand causing you to drop it out of reflex. It crashes down spraying all over Nanami’s suit and paper work.

“Oh my god I’m so sorry!” You grab a fist full of paper towels frantically trying to clean off his suit. You pat the spilled coffee from his lap, He shifts in his seat.

“Uhn-“ he makes a soft noise catching you off guard.

You bolt up your face is red hot, you look away in embarrassment.

“I-I can pay to have this dry cleaned! Ugh I’m such a klutz-“

He interjects “no it’s fine you don’t have to do that”

“Please allow me too I wouldn’t forgive myself if I didn’t” you bite your lip in guilt.

His eyes darken at the sight of you standing there looking so remorseful and innocent. He looks away for a second debating his next move.

“If you insist, the jacket only will be enough I assure you” he says slowly, sliding his coat off. His arms bulge through his white button down shirt.

He hands you the jacket hesitantly You’re dying of embarrassment.

“I’ll have this back to you tomorrow I swear it” you blurt quickly walking away.

~

“That coffee was a nightmare to get out kid” The dry cleaner complains.

You give an apologetic look as you sign the ticket finalizing the payment.

“Thanks again For getting it done so quick Danny”

“Yeah yeah yeah next time tell the guy to make the coffee land in his mouth got it” you laugh as you wave goodbye walking out the door. You check your phone , 6:10 pm, Nanami asked you to be there at 5:30 but work held you up today.

Luckily the dry cleaners is around the block from your apartment like most things. Before you know it your apartment entrance is in sight, You push the elevator button. It takes forever as usual, when it finally arrives you walk inside. Nanami lived on the same floor as you just opposite sides. You walk down the hall that connects your building’s searching for unit 12.

Your phone lights up, it’s a text from nanami ‘having trouble finding me?’ You laugh to yourself stopping to type back.

‘Closer than you think’ just as you press send the door in front of you swings open.

You jump with a fright, he sure had a way of scaring you. He’s standing there dressed completely different from how you were use to seeing him. He wore a green long sleeve top, Casual dark jeans , his eyes were covered by strange glasses.

“Come on in” he smirks.

You step over the threshold laying the jacket across his cream couch. His apartment was clean, not regular clean, everything was perfectly in its place. Despite all the lighter themes there wasn’t a spec of dirty anywhere in sight.

“I’m sorry I’m late work-“ you explain

“I understand, would you like a drink “ he disappears into the kitchen, returning with two wine glasses and a bottle of an unknown expensive looking champagne.

“Uh-uh yeah sure”

You sit on the couch crossing one leg over the other nervously. The space beside you dips as he sits next to you. You watch the muscles in his hands twitch as he pours your glass. You squirm in your seat, squeezing your legs tightly together.

‘Is he smirking’ you think to yourself watching him out the corner of your eye.

He hands you the drink before pouring his own. He watches curiously over the rim of his glass as he takes a sip, His stare sends a twitch through your clit.

“You like Austen as well?” He asks, you give a confused look.

He continues “ The book you were reading earlier” you realize he must have caught a glimpse at it earlier.

“Oh, Yes I do she is one of my favorites actually” you admit.

He reaches over tucking a fallen strand of hair behind your ear.

“I’m sorry im kind of a neat freak I hope I didn’t offend you-“ he doesn’t move his hand away.

“N-no it’s okay” your body is warm, the alcohol creeps up on you slowly. Before you can stop yourself you nuzzling closer into his palm, his thumb strokes your cheek. He slides his hand to the nape of your neck gently pulling you closer as he leans in.

“Is this okay?” He breathes parting his lips.

Your breathing becomes erratic as you glance down at his lips inches from your own.

“Y-yes...” he runs his tongue gently over your bottom lip before capturing them in a hungry kiss.

He briefly breaks away removing his glasses setting them on the coffee table. In one swift motion he grips your waist hoisting you onto his lap, you wrap your arms around his neck in surprise. You lean into him pushing him into the couch cushion his hand travels up your back to your neck pulling you to his waiting lips. “Mmm Uhn-“ He moans slipping his tongue between your lips.

You grind against him the clothing between you becoming an unwanted barrier. His skillful hands slide up your back release your bra clasp, he pulls away flustered and messy hair’d. You lift your arms as he slides your shirt and bra above your head tossing it into the far corner.

“Keep your arms above your head” He orders.

You obey holding your arms up, His tongue attacks your strained nipples. He sucks gently, Using his hand to tease the other, it’s too much to take and your arms drop.

“Arms up or I stop, Little one” you whimper raising your hands above your head.

He sucks your hard bud into his mouth giving it a soft nip sending lighting between your thighs.

“Ah Ah Please mmmnh-“ you plead for more. His hands travel up your skirt pushing your panties aside invading your soaking folds.

“Mmmm so wet already” he brings his fingers to his lips tasting your excitement.

“You’ve been dreaming of this haven’t you, watching me stroke my cock through your drapes at night “ he plunges two fingers inside your slippery hole. You gasp holding back a scream as he finger fucks you slowly.

“Take it out” he demands.

You waste no time unzipping his pants and freeing his pulsing member. You stroke his length admiring how big he is.

“Sit on it” he grips your waist positioning your entrance with his tip. He strokes your slit teasing you making you beg for more.

You grind against him pushing down desperate for him to fill you up. He lets out a feral growl slamming you down on his cock mercilessly.

“Fuck yeah take it, Ah you like the way I stretch your little pussy don’t you” he slaps your ass bouncing you up and down.

He rails into you at a feverish pace, your hips colliding relentlessly.

“ Look at me, Look me in my fucking eyes, show me that pretty face while I fuck you” he groans.

You look at him tears of pleasure staining your face as you get closer to your climax.

He grabs your hair crashing his lips to yours entangling your tongues.

“Ah Ah I’m gonna cum” you cry out, he Drills harder into you biting the soft skin of your neck.

“Cum for me princess, yeah just like that, good girl” he moans.

“Look at me, Look at me, show me how you cum baby, Ah fuck” it sent you over the edge your walls clench around him juices washing over his twitching cock. His eyes roll back as he messily pumps into you filling you with cum. You fall forward, he wraps his arms around you holding you together. You’re both sweat drenched and fucked out depending on each other’s bodies for support.

“You should have spilled coffee on me sooner” he states seriously.

You look at each other in silence before breaking into uncontrollable laughter.

“I agree” you say smiling like a idiot.

~the end💗 comment please tell me who you’d like to see next 🥵🥲

[mspufflehuff]

Maybe Kids Aren’t So Bad

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x plus size!reader

Summary: Y/N and Bucky have been dancing around their feelings for a while now. They decide to get out of the tower and go to the store. They happen to pass by some kids who are fans of the avengers. 

Word Count: 2.3k words 

Warnings: Mentions of kidnapping, torture, nightmares, and lots of fluff.

Masterlist!! 

Author’s Note: I saw lots of people liked my first fanfic! Soon after I saw people liked the first one, I started writing this one. I hope you all enjoy it because I sure did. Have a great day everyone who reads this! (gif below is not mine!!) 

"Does someone wanna go with me to go grocery shopping?" you asked the others in the tower as you stood behind the island.  Everyone had been awake for about 15 minutes and almost all of them were eating in the kitchen.  A few of them didn't hear you as you didn't say it very loudly.  Tony told you he had things to do, just like him.  Thor and Natasha said they had to train today and go to a mission briefing.  Steve apologized and told you he had to finish and turn in  the report for the mission he got back from yesterday. 

Soon Bucky walked into the kitchen.  He looked like he hadn't been sleeping, which you knew very well since you could hear him at night through the walls.  You wanted to comfort him but you were nervous since you didn't know him all that well to begin with.  He had arrived at the tower a few months ago and was very quiet with everyone except Steve. 

You couldn't deny that he was an attractive man.  You also had a soft spot for him since you knew what it was like to be alone and scared in some type of lab that kept you against your will.  You had been abducted when you were a teen and had been taken to some type of scary lab where you were injected with chemicals.  The scientist had given you powers that allowed you to control the plants around you.  You could harness energy from them and control them by will. 

You could understand Bucky's nightmares and feel the pain in the sound of his screams at night.  You used to have those same screams and nightmares but learned to keep them from keeping you up at night.  You had started meditating, talking to people, training to release all your anger, finding hobbies that distracted you, and even simple things such as writing it down to then burn the paper you wrote it on. 

You watched as he sat down at one of the island chairs.  Most of the avengers had already left the room by the time he sat down.  You looked at him and gave him a soft smile.  "Morning, Bucky. Would you like some coffee?" you asked him in a soft voice, watching his ocean blue eyes move across your form.  "Yes, please…" he replied in a tired but sweet voice.  You grabbed the mug he used most of the time and filled it with coffee.  He watched how you got everything right about his coffee, down to how much he would naturally fill it. 

He was surprised and yet amazed you paid that much attention to him.  "Here you go."  You handed Bucky his coffee, and he grabbed it with his right hand, gently grazing your fingers as he held the handle.  He watched your eyes when your hands grazed.  He thought he saw something there sparkling in your eyes but wasn't sure as you turned away to get him something to eat.  You turned to grab him something to eat as well as to hide your light blush from your fingers grazing. 

You took another minute to turn back around so the blush could cool from your cheeks.  Handing him a protein bar, you picked up the cup of tea you had made yourself earlier.  "I wanted to ask if you wanted to get out of the tower and go to the grocery store with me?"  Bucky looked into your eyes as he thought about if he was up for it.  He had to think not because it was you, but because he was scared of people seeing him and running.  He hardly left the tower unless it was for missions or on the off chance he needed clothes to wear. 

"Sure, Y/N. I think that would be good.  It's a nice day out, and we can hang out together as we don't normally hang out."  He spoke with a soft smile on his lips, taking another drink from his coffee.  You smiled happily and nodded towards him.  "Alright then! It's a date! I'll let you eat, and I have to do a few things before we go out.  I'll meet you in the lobby around 12?" you asked, walking towards the end of the island, making your way to the hallway.  "It's a date.' Bucky agreed and smiled back, watching you walk off. 

~Time Skip~

It had been about an hour since Y/N and Bucky said they would meet up in the lobby for their 'date'.  You had been nervously pacing around your room after you heard the word date fell off of Bucky's lips. You didn't know what to do or wear. Well, you had an idea of what you would wear, but would it make you weird? Finally, you decided on a cute sundress since it was sunny and warm outside. You fixed your hair, put on light makeup (or no makeup if you don't wear any), and picked out your comfy pair of vans. Looking at yourself in the mirror, you let out a sigh and thought you were trying too hard to look cute for Bucky. "Why am I dressing like we are actually going on a date?" You asked yourself aloud and towards the mirror. 

You grabbed your phone and looked at the time, grabbing your small purse while walking out the door. Making your way to the elevator, Bucky stepped out of his room in a pair of comfy clothes. He was wearing a navy blue shirt with some light blue jeans. He tried to look nice like you did. He had brushed his hair back some and looked relaxed. He soon noticed you and gave you a smile, the one that usually melts you into a puddle. 

"Oh hey, Doll…  Wow  You look so pretty…" he tells you softly as you walk up towards him. "You look pretty handsome yourself." you replied, shyly smiling as you both walked towards the elevator.  "I have a list on my phone of what we need to get for everyone.  I was also thinking of cooking and baking tonight for everyone." you told Bucky as you turned on your phone.  "What were you planning on cooking?" he asked, pressing the button for the lobby. 

"Hmm…  I don't know just yet.  I was thinking of making something called Beef Tripe soup. It's a famous dish in Romania, and I've always wanted to travel to Romania, or well anywhere that isn't here in the United States." You rambled a little as you rode the elevator with Bucky.  "Sorry... I love to cook and bake.  I grew up baking and cooking with my mom before I was kidnapped."  You smiled as you reminisced about your memories with your mother.  "Doll, it's ok.  You can ramble to me.  I enjoy hearing from you talking about food and different recipes."  He then took in the last sentence that you were kidnapped.  Steve had briefly mentioned you had been kidnapped but never went any further than that.  "If you don't mind me asking, how were you kidnapped?"  He was curious but didn't want to bring up any painful memories the kidnapping had created for you. 

"Well, I was at home and working on homework for school, boring, I know."  You chuckled and thought back to it.  "I remember sitting at my desk and having my earbuds in.  I realized it was around maybe 10 pm, and I was hungry for a small snack.  So, I went downstairs with my earbuds still in my ears.  As I made my way to the kitchen, I felt someone or something looking at me.  I turned around to see a guy in all black.  He ran towards me before I could scream for help.  He knocked me out and took me to this disgusting lab, had me strapped on an old medical operating table."

Bucky listened to you, pissed beyond belief that someone kidnapped a random girl from her house.  Let alone the fact that you were only a teenager when you got kidnapped, which made his blood boil.  You continued, not noticing Bucky's face.  "For years, he would test on me, come up with new experiments and chemicals to put into my body.  Finally, one day after he said he found 'the perfect formula,' he tested it on me.  After hours of being in excruciating pain, I found out that I could control plants…  There was a weed growing in front of the small window he kept in his lab.  It was the only window that had access to sunlight.  I remember him beating me, and as I was begging him to stop, the plant grew larger as if it felt my pain and came to help me." 

"It kept growing as he kept beating me into submission so he could test more chemicals on me.  After what felt like an hour of beating me up, the plant managed to become this massive accumulation of weeds, flowers, leaves, and any other plant material it could find.  It made its way to the man and wrapped around him, pulling him away from me. The plants started strangling him.  He eventually lost consciousness and once the plant realized he was passed out, it started wilting slowly and soon died.  You could say my pain was what caused the plants to save me." 

Bucky was watching you in awe, though he seemed upset (at the man, never you) at your story. "Wow, Doll…  I can't believe that happened to you.  I'm so sorry." he told you, and you gently took his metal arm and held his hand, smiling softly up at him.  "Thank you, Buck.  I really appreciate it.  It took some time to get over it and the pain of the nightmares, but I'm stronger than I used to be because of it."  You let go of his hand when the elevator dinged to let you know you made it to the lobby. 

You both walked out of the elevator and to the grocery store that was around the block.  You walked in casual silence and grabbed a shopping cart once you entered the small store.  Bucky helped you get everything on the list and a few ton of other things you didn't really need but was requested by the other avengers.  After what felt like a long time, you and Bucky finally finished shopping and headed towards the checkout section. 

As you and Bucky made your way over to the checkout section, you both heard soft gasps from behind you.  You both then heard whispering that sounded like it belonged to some children.  "Is that really him, Charlie?!"  "It has to be Dante!!"  Soon, the sound of running could be heard coming from behind you and Bucky.  You looked towards Bucky to see if he heard it as well.  He had.  As you both turned around, you saw two young kids that looked to be around 6 or 7, running towards you both. 

The two kids, Charlie and Dante, you assumed, stopped in front of you.  They look up with awe on their faces at you and Bucky.  "Mr. Winter Soldier??" The little boy asks Bucky with a bright smile on his face.  "Uh.. yes?" he asks as he moves to stand on one knee before the little boy.  "Can I have your autograph??  Please, Mr. Winter Soldier!  You're my favorite superhero!!"  Bucky was taken back at the boy's words.  "O-oh sure!"  He was excited that a young child wanted his autograph after everything he's done as the winter soldier.  He grabbed a piece of paper and a pen, writing Dante a note before signing it. 

Bucky handed Dante the note with a smile. Immediately after he gave Dante the signed paper, Dante gave Bucky a big hug. "Thank you so much, Mr. Winter Soldier!!" Dante told him happily and ran over to his mom.  Charlie was talking with Y/N the whole time Bucky was with Dante.  "Ms. Y/L/N?" She shyly asked you while tugging on your dress lightly.  "Yes, hun?" you asked with a smile and moved down to her eye level.  "Are you Mr. Winter Soldier's girlfriend?"  You blushed dark, and your eyes widened at Charlie's words. 

"Uh… well, that's a complicated sweetheart.  Maybe one day." you tell Charlie, and she smiles brightly and squeals, running off to her mom and brother.  Bucky, thankfully, didn't hear you tell Charlie you hoped to be his girlfriend one day.  After you talked with the kids, you paid for all your groceries and walked back to the tower. 

"Hey, Doll?" Bucky asked, looking at you as you walked beside each other on the street.  "Yes, Bucky?" you replied, glancing at him before turning your head to look in front of you.  "What did that little girl ask you? I heard her say something, but I couldn't make it out." he asked you curiously, having wondered since they left the grocery store a few minutes ago.  "Oh yeah. She did ask me something.." you said softly as you kept walking, not telling him as you were scared he wouldn't like you back. 

"Y/N, was it something bad?  Something that made you think of past memories?"  He stopped you in the middle of the sidewalk, gently grabbed your hand.  "No, no, Bucky, I promise!  It's just… embarrassing…"  He tilted his head like a confused puppy looking at you.  You took a minute before you let out a sigh.  "She asked me… if I was your girlfriend."  You looked away for a second before looking back at him. 

"Oh... " he mumbled out softly and looked away from your gaze.  You were scared that he would reject you, but you had no time to react as he said, "Well, would you like to be?"  Your eyes widened, and you blinked a few times.  It took you a minute to come back with a response.  You soon found yourself smirking, asking him, "Why don't you take me on a date first, Barnes?"  You took your hand out of his and walked into the Avengers tower, feeling confident in yourself.  As you left Bucky on the sidewalk to walk into the tower, you heard an excited Barnes exclaim, "Finally!"  You giggled as you continued into the tower. 

[trillian-anders]

four christmases

pairing: ransom drysdale x reader

warnings:  slight violence, angst, fluff, smut && SPOILERS

word count: 16k

description: part 2 of 5. CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS, PLEASE DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVE NOT WATCHED THE FILM. you’ve been working for the thrombeys for four years now,the last three years of your service being a glorified babysitter to the most annoying, self-absorbed, dickhead hugh ransom drysdale. These are the four christmases you’ve spent with the thrombey/drysdale clan during your times of service. 

a/n: this story is brought to you by season 4 of schitt’s creek and maybe 12 cups of coffee. it felt like it took forever to write, but i’m happy to bring it to you. this is the follow up for my other ransom one-shot ‘the assistant’. i hope you guys like it! 

2018

What a fucking asshole. 

“You have to be there, it’s your job.” Ransom huffed indignantly. You rolled your eyes from the passenger seat of his beamer, tablet open in your lap as you scrolled through your sister’s amazon wishlist. 

“I have a family too Ransom. I can’t just abandon my own family on Christmas just because you can’t get along with yours.” His knuckles turned white against the gear shift. Nothing else mattered, only him it seemed, and his whining Mommy complex. 

“You were hired to assist me,” Ransom pulled into the drive of his house, tires crunching on the gavel, “So assist.” What a fucking tool. He quickly exited the car not looking behind him to see if you were following into the house, but leaving the front door wide open with the expectation that you were coming right behind. 

You had just hopped onto this assistant gig a few months ago. There you were minding your own business as fall began, working for a temp agency, when Linda Drysdale rang you up and asked you to come work for the family again. You had recently been tutoring one of the youngest of the clan, Meg, with her English coursework for her last school year. The pay was good and you were kind of let down when they opted not to keep you on after summer concluded. 

Babysitting Ransom paid well, better than it had been to help Meg out, but was it really worth the price? Ransom was a fucking child. You cooked his meals, washed his laundry, and were forced to tail him as he went about whatever business he deemed worthy of his days. Just until 9 pm, that’s all you had to do. Twelve hours a day, five days a week. Off Sundays and Mondays. 

It felt like too much and not worth the paycheck. Even if the trust-fund asshole spent his days flirting around from one party to the next. More often than not he found himself a body to bring home leaving you to get an uber back to his place just so you could get your car to go home, or worse yet having you sit awkwardly in the backseat of the car as whoever was in the passenger seat desperately tried to give him road head. 

He loved it. You know he did. Eyes flitting to yours in the rear-view mirror as a girl ten years younger than him fumbled with his belt. A fucking smirk on his face. You wanted to punch him, but your sister’s private school tuition held you back. 

You followed him into the house, one you had just spent the entire morning cleaning as Ransom slept off his hangover. The prick had dropped his coat on the floor adjacent to the coat hook, shoes haphazardly kicked off beside it, glaring at him as you picked them up while he drank orange juice straight from the carton. 

“I’ll pay you time and a half if you come.” He bartered. 

“You don’t pay me anything,” You scoffed. “Your Mom pays me.” 

“Exactly.” He tossed the carton back in the fridge, coming around the counter to get closer to you. He dropped his voice in what he probably thought was a seductive whisper. The fire it lit in your core would lead you to believe that it actually was a seductive whisper and you just fucking hated him. “I’ll make it worth your while.” He drug a finger down your cheek softly. It only caused you to roll your eyes, batting his finger away and stripping yourself of your coat you turned back to him, 

“I want triple.” 

Your sister was going to be pissed, but she’ll survive once she realizes you were able to get her a new laptop for school. A compromise. 

She cried. 

The Thrombey’s were probably the worst people you’ve ever met in your entire life. Harlan was prideful, pompous. He cared about his family, to an extent. He created them after all, his monsters. 

Linda was okay, but she was a lot like her father. She felt as though she was better than everyone else simply because she ‘built herself from the ground up’ yeah, if the ground was a million dollars gifted from Daddy. Her husband, Richard, was a glorified sugar baby, you were sure at one point he was a real estate broker, but Linda had the business, he just rode on her coattails. 

Walt was a whiny bastard. He was meek. He walked around with a cane and you weren’t sure he even needed it. It could totally be a ploy to try and gain more sympathy from his father. His wife was a drunk, you couldn’t remember her name, but it didn’t matter because she wouldn’t talk to you anyway. You can’t talk if you always have your mouth wrapped around the lip of a martini glass. Their son, Jacob, was a little alt-right shit. Every comment that came out of his mouth was a dig on some less privileged 99% and if you didn’t need this job you’d shove his head in the toilet yourself.

That leads you to Joni and Meg. Joni and Ransom had both been given an allowance every month. That’s the way they were mostly the same. How they differed was that Joni was at least attempting to have some sort of entrepreneur business where she gained some income, but not enough to live the lifestyle she was accustomed to. She had Meg in this expensive ass private school that cost more than your salary a month and Meg found this group of liberal women and now she was becoming the extreme opposite of Jacob. They often bumped heads, with Meg slowly giving in. She always gave in. This was her family and as much as she wanted to fight for the 99% she never actually wanted to be one. 

But it was fine. 

It didn’t really matter. 

You just wanted to go home. 

Ransom hasn’t had an empty hand all day thanks to you. “If I’m ever without a drink,” He said on the way over, “You’re walking home.” So this is where you’re standing, with Marta and Fran, you sipping on a weak mimosa that Marta had compromised on, waiting for the day to be over. 

Ransom’s eyes met yours from across the room, hand raising his glass, the last little mouthful swishing against its side. You sighed and rolled your eyes, turning to grab the decanter behind you, walking over to fill his glass. “So I told him to shove it up his ass,” Linda was telling Harlan a story, “If you think for one moment I would give in to anything less than market price you’re out of your mind.” Please love me, she was saying, please see that I’m the best child you have. Harlan’s eyes were dazed, not looking at hers. Thinking. He was always thinking. 

The only time Ransom didn’t need you was when he disappeared into his Grandfather’s office. Presents were handed out just before, new iphones, apple watches, macbooks, cartier bracelets, rolexes, a couple of little bonus checks to their allowances, the spirit of Christmas was definitely lost on this family. 

It doesn’t matter. 

You had just filled Ransom’s glass before he entered the study and you knew he wouldn’t need you until some kind of argument broke out with his Grandfather and you had to be ready to leave the house at a moment’s notice. 

“How’s it goin’ kid?” Richard always kind of made you uncomfortable. He seemed normal, but you were uncomfortable in a ‘this is a rich older white man who liked to corner you alone’ kind of way. For the most part he’s been harmless. 

One time, this was early on when you first started to tutor Meg, he found you in a similar way. Alone, in the kitchen. This was one of the first times he had met you and he was sure to let you know, “You’ve got a really pretty face, you know that?” Ew. Thanks? He had gotten close, too close. “How’d a pretty girl like you end up as a tutor?” That’s worse. And cheesy. This looked like one of those times, except he’d been drinking since 8 am. 

“I’m fine thanks.” You had been trying to find a minute of peace. There was always someone talking in this house, during ‘debates’ there were usually three or four. This was supposed to be a break. Ransom having been passed off to another wet nurse he could suck off of while you got some rest, and maybe sneak a couple of those expensive chocolate artisanal cookies for good measure. Richard grinned at you, not in the way Ransom would when he was fucking with you, but something more predatory. He was feeling ambitious. 

“I just wanted to give you this,” He slipped an envelope across the counter to you, hand resting on it, waiting for you to take it. As your hand met the envelope, he did the fucking worst thing he could possibly do in this moment, and took your hand. Your heart was racing and you felt wildly uncomfortable. He held your hand, taking a step into your space, body crowding yours against the counter. You stared him down, please just let me go. Please just fucking let me go. “How’s my son treating you?” He asked. What exactly did he think you were doing for his son?

“Fine.” You swallowed harshly. Please just let me go. You could smell the whiskey on his breath, face coming closer to yours. 

“If you ever need anything…” Closer and closer. You wished you could pull back completely, get out of this situation, but the vice grip he currently had on your hand was making it difficult. 

“Y/N.” Your eyes snapped over to the doorway, Ransom. His jaw was clenched, face flushed from what you were sure was an argument with Harlan. “We’re leaving.” Richard turned and smiled at his son, releasing your hand. You quietly slipped the envelope into your jeans pocket, backing yourself away from him, and joining Ransom across the room where his eyes hadn’t yet left his father. It wasn’t until you made it to the front door, grabbing your coat from the coat rack did he stomp his way out of the house, digging his car keys from his pockets. 

“Ransom I don’t think you should be driving-” You started, but he turned to you, eyes wild. This scared you. 

“Get in the car.” He demanded. Fuck, he’s drunk.

“Ransom you’re drunk, you can’t drive right now.” His eyes looked behind you and you turned to look at his family, peeking out through the curtains to watch the show. He quickly grabbed your arm, tugging you to the passenger seat, wrenching the door open and shoving you in, slamming the door behind you to circle around to the drivers side. “Just let me drive.” You pleaded. He slammed his own car door, revving the engine and quickly whipping the car out of the driveway. 

He wasn’t saying anything and Ransom always had something to say. 

“Ransom-”

“Shut the fuck up.” His knuckles were white against the wheel, eyes staring straight ahead as he began gaining speed. 

60 mph,

65 mph,

70…

“Slow down!” He was scaring you, these roads were winding and dark, his high beams only did so much and you weren’t sure how many deer you’d be seeing tonight. His foot was heavy on the accelerator. 

75

80

85

“Ransom please!” You cried. His breathing was heavy. His eyes were moving wildly left to right as he moved the wheel to turn.

90

95

100

You were going to die. This was it, this was the end. The car hit the open road, the interstate, and to the left of the on ramp you had just flew through was a cop. Their lights started flashing, red and blue filling the car as Ransom kept accelerating. It wasn’t late at night, probably around nine or so. There were other cars here as Ransom kept gaining speed, swerving in and out of traffic. “You’ve got to pull over!” You yelled at him.

105

110

115

“Ransom for the love of god, fucking stop!” His eyes looked in the rearview, two cops now. It was then he began to slow down, moving over to the side of the road, your heart still racing in your chest. You relax your fingers which you didn’t even realize was gripping Ransom’s bicep in a steel grip. Both of you breathing heavily inside the car. It wasn’t until the cop heavily banged on the window that either of you even moved. 

“Sir, I’m gonna have to ask you to step out of the vehicle.” A bright flashlight in your face as you dug around for his registration and insurance in the glove box. Exiting the car and circling to the trunk as Ransom was handing the four cops bills from his money clip. Why the fuck did Ransom have a money clip full of hundreds? Ransom’s eyes met yours as he stuffed his money clip back in his coat pocket before tossing you the keys which you caught awkwardly. 

“Take me home.” 

You looked over at the cops who were getting back in their squad cars before quietly getting in the driver's seat and shutting the door. Your heart was still pounding and as the adrenaline began wearing off you suddenly grew very tired. 

“Drive.” You didn’t want to hear his voice. You never wanted to see his face again. You never even wanted to hear his name again. 

“You’re the fucking worst.” You could feel yourself crying. That was the most terrifying experience you’ve ever had in your life. 

“Well you’re fucking my father so,” He sunk down in his seat. “I think I have some competition.”

“I’m not fucking your father!” You exclaimed, hand hitting the steering wheel. You hear him scoff from the passenger seat.

“Not today since I walked in on you. Which is funny, you put on this whole show about not wanting to be around my family and what was it all for? A fucking ploy so I didn’t know.” Ransom didn’t fucking know how much of a goddamn idiot he was being right now. 

As the gravel crunched beneath the tires of the beamer, your argument continued. “I’m not fucking your father, I’ve never fucked your father, and I never will fuck your father.” He wasn’t hearing you. 

“Is this why Linda pays you so much?” He scoffed, exiting the car. He looked at you from over the roof and continued, “So you keep Richard out of her bed?” You hadn’t stopped crying. Still half going from fear and the other half from frustration. It was so goddamn cold out that the tears were freezing against your cheeks. 

“Ransom, I am not fucking your father!” You yelled, “The reason she pays me what she does is because the exact fucking thing you’re doing right now.” He rolled his eyes, walking up to the front door of his house, 

“Give me my keys.” 

“No.” You were still standing by the car, keys fisted in your hand. “You’re being a fucking asshole right now.” 

He clenched his fist, slamming it into the front door before turning back to you and yelling, “Give me my fucking keys Y/N.” You both looked at one another for a moment. 

You took a deep breath. “I have nothing to do with your father Ransom. My only job is to wait on you like a fucking servant and that is what I get paid to do. Not be your fucking punching bag when your family turns out to be a bunch of dicks-”

“Give me-”

“I’m not finished!” You screamed. Tears were still streaming heavily down your face and Ransom stood five feet away from you awkwardly letting you continue. “I don’t deserve this Ransom. I really fucking don’t. You literally almost just fucking killed me. So you’re going to say you’re sorry, you’re going to go into your fucking house, you’re going to give me what you promised me for even having to deal with this shit tonight, and you’re going to give me the rest of the week off.” 

It was silent for a moment. The two of you standing in the cold Massachusetts air in silence. Your face was starting to burn and as the silence stretched on you began to doubt everything you just said. Fuck this could cost you the job. The envelope Richard had handed you weighed heavily in your pocket. Hopefully it would be enough to hold you over until you could get back to the temp agency. 

Ransom let out a breath he had been holding, turning fully to you, and walking down the two steps of his porch. You flinched back away from him, looking at his knuckles that were split and bleeding from punching the door. His eyes met yours and he looked like he was debating something. 

“I’m sorry.” His words were soft and whispered, hand coming forward with an open palm, waiting for his keys. You gently gave them back to him. That soft, whispered, ‘I’m sorry’ stunned you. You didn’t expect your yelling to actually work. You expected to be fired. His keys jingled as he reached in his pocket and brought that money clip back out, extracting a bundle of hundreds and holding them out to you between two fingers. “Go home.” 

That was never spoken of again. The thing with Richard in the kitchen, being pulled over on 95, the screaming match that ensued, and nothing was ever said about the solid gold, $6,500 cartier bracelet that was by no doubt wrapped at the store that was waiting for you when you arrived back at work five days later. 

2019

“What did he do?” You were sweating. It was so fucking hot in here, but you were afraid to take off your coat. The fanfare in which the detectives had pulled up to your apartment complex was embarrassing, quickly bringing you down to the police station and shoving you in an interrogation room. 

“What did who do?” The man who had introduced himself as Lieutenant Elliot asked you. Shit. What the fuck did Ransom do? The death of Harlan Thrombey was sudden, right after his birthday just two weeks ago. It was unsettling, the suicide. The funeral was uncomfortable to say the least. Ransom told you to go and then didn’t go himself so you stood there like some weird interloper on the tails of everyone’s grief. 

You were going to throw up, you’ve never so much as gotten a speeding ticket but suddenly you had a kilo of coke on you and an unlicensed gun. “Where were you the night Harlan Thrombey committed suicide?” You picked at your fingernails. 

“I was at the party,” Your throat was so dry, you were afraid to touch the glass of water they had set before you, “I always feel strange around the family so unless Ransom needs me I try to hide out in the kitchen.” 

“You’re his assistant?” Elliot asked, “He doesn’t have a job, so what exactly do you assist with?”

“I’m pretty much his babysitter.” You explained, “I make sure he doesn’t get into too much trouble…” It’s ironic right? You bit your bottom lip. “Why am I here exactly?” The other man in the room, Wagner, spoke up, 

“Hugh Drysdale has been arrested in the murder of Harlan Thrombey’s housekeeper.” Elliot gave him a dirty look. 

“Fran’s dead?” The shock was evident on your face. You leaned back in the uncomfortable metal chair, discarding your coat and scarf and taking a large mouthful of water. 

“You seemed surprisingly absent from Hugh’s side throughout the aftermath of Harlan’s suicide, why is that?” The third man spoke up from his spot sitting in the corner of the room, the thick southern accent was almost comical. 

“Ransom gave me time off,” You recalled, voice trailing off as you finish your sentence, “He said I could go to my sister’s cello recital…”  Did he really kill her? “Why would he kill Fran?” It made no sense. “I mean, he’s an asshole, but murder?”

They played a recording. Ransom in his own, self-righteous, pompous voice. Fuck me. What a fucking idiot. “So tell us where you were on the dates in question, spare no details.”

You had thought it strange, Ransom had left you stranded at the Thrombey house and you were forced to find your own way back to his house to get your car. It wasn’t at all strange that when you got to his house his car wasn’t there. You’d just assumed he’d gone out. It wasn’t uncommon for him to go out after finding arguments with his family. But the next day when he suggested that you take the week off, spend time with your sister, go to that recital you didn’t know he knew about, you checked his forehead with your wrist.

“Are you sick?” You had asked. He gently pushed your wrist off of his forehead, giving you a terse look. 

“Harlan committed suicide last night, the funeral is tomorrow, but after that you should take some time. I need some time.” Your heart broke a bit. Yeah Ransom and Harlan butt heads all the time, but they were practically the same person so it made sense to you that they would fight. Both prideful assholes. 

“I’m so sorry Ransom.” Should you hug him? You didn’t know. You two didn’t have any physical contact really. You’d never seen him hug anyone. So no, no hugs. “Is there anything I can do for you?” You opted to just gently lay your hand on his wrist. His eyes met yours for a moment, silence. 

“Just come to the funeral.” With that he stood up and walked away. 

That’s why it was so off-putting when the bastard didn’t even show up to the funeral and as you stood there with his sobbing family you figured next time you saw him you were going to spit in his coffee. 

“I haven’t seen him since the day before the funeral.” You admitted to the officers. “He asked me to go, and didn’t even show up.” 

“If we have any other questions we’ll let you know.” And you were released from questioning, but you had so many questions yourself. Arson? Fran? He attempted to murder Marta. Was this worth it? The fucking asshole never had to work for anything in his life, and even now as you stood in the courtroom waiting to see what bail would be set as so you could relay to Linda, you wanted to smack his pretty little face for being such a fucking idiot. 

A bailiff read out the case number and in walked Ransom. You’d never seen him in any outfit that cost less than your rent and here the bastard was, walking in with a black and white striped jumpsuit, the county jail logo stamped in red on the back.  You were the only person that showed up for him. Linda was half waiting for you to text her a dollar amount so she could pay his bail, the other half of her was debating on whether to leave him there or not. At least, that’s what she told you anyway. 

You could only imagine what you looked like to him. Your eyes were puffy and red from just crying in the parking lot for an hour in between getting questioned and coming to his hearing. Before that the detectives had taken you practically from your bed. But you were here, in yoga pants and a sweatshirt, coat pulled over the ratty thing, and snow boots on your feet. It started snowing this morning. 

His eyes caught yours as soon as he entered, but he quickly looked away. It was like a goddamn movie, his wrists cuffed to his waist, a chain leading down to the cuffs around his ankles. 

Ransom Drysdale murdered someone. 

A chill went down your spine, “Bail set at a million dollars.” And a gavel. Cameras clicking behind you. Thirty minutes later you were waiting for his release. You handed a dry cleaning bag with clothes to the officer at the front desk. 

Ransom Drysdale murdered someone. 

It wasn’t long before the secure, thick, metal door behind the metal detectors opened and Ransom was walking through it back to you. He wouldn’t meet your eyes, quickly circling to the desk to get his phone, wallet, and keys back. The garment bag was shoved back in your hands containing the clothes he was wearing when he was arrested, and then he was out the doors of the county jail, speed walking to your car. His was taken in as evidence. 

You used your key fob to unlock the car, Ransom wordlessly climbing in the passenger seat and slamming the door behind him as you settled in the driver’s. This was uncomfortable. You drove in silence for a minute, awkwardly leaning over to turn on the radio. The song only played for a second before Ransom leaned over, smacking the button to turn it off again. 

“Just say it.” He spat out at you. Your hands gripped the steering wheel tightly. 

“Say what, Ransom?” You were scared of him now and he could tell. He breathed harshly through his nose. You could feel his eyes on you. 

“Aren’t you going to ask me if I did it? Why I did it? Yell at me for being a fucking idiot?” He threw his hands up in frustration. There was a beat of silence more, “Say something.” 

“I don’t know what to say!” You really didn’t. What do you even say? You’ve been cursing him for a while. In your head. Cursing him since you left the interrogation earlier. You didn’t know what any of this meant for your job, if you’ll be able to keep your sister in school, if you’ll be able to even afford the apartment you two live in right now. And all because Ransom wasn’t getting anymore fucking money from his Grandfather the fucking prick. 

“Anything. Fucking say…” He leaned over in his seat, growing close to you. “Are you scared of me?” He smirked. Not in his, I’m playing with you and getting my way, smirk. And not in his, I’m making you weirdly uncomfortable and it really gets me off, smirk. But some sick sinister type of smirk that made your stomach roll. 

“You fucking murdered someone Ransom.” You said between clenched teeth. He studied you for a minute before settling back in his seat. Silence took over until you made it to the front door of his house. Lawyers should be coming by in about an hour to start working on his case, his parents should be here soon as well seeing as they were backing all of this. 

“You think I would hurt you?” Ransom asked as he stripped himself of his coat, purposefully letting it fall to the floor just so you’d have to pick it up. You left it there. He turned to look at you, still in the doorway of his house. “I killed Fran because I had to.” He spat. “It was for the bigger fucking picture. You want to be paid don’t you? You like having money right?”

“Your Mom pays me Ransom.” You stated calmly. His voice was escalating in volume as he continued.

“So fucking what? Who bought you that fucking coat, huh?” He was talking about the expensive wool coat you are currently wearing. He bought it for you after seeing that your old bubble coat had stuffing pouring out of the right pocket. You didn’t ask for it. “Who pays for your fucking phone, huh?” You had a month-by-month plan before. Ransom gifted you and your sister iphones sometime in the spring, saying that he needed to be able to reach you without having every call get dropped due to bad reception. Your sister’s was just because they were buy-one-get-one, or so he said. You didn’t ask for it. “And that fucking bracelet on your wrist too? Is my Mom buying you jewelry? Or just me and my fucking Dad?” He was still under the impression that something had gone on between you and his father apparently. 

“That’s it! I’m done.” You yelled back at him. “I fucking quit.”  You stripped the coat off your shoulders and tossed  it on the floor beside his watching his mouth snap shut. You wiggled the bracelet off your wrist and threw that down on top of it before slipping your phone out of the side pocket of your yoga pants and throwing that on the pile. “I’ll mail Julia’s phone back to you.” You still hadn’t stepped foot inside the house, turning to walk back to your car when Ransom’s thundering footsteps could be heard behind you. 

Fuck he was going to kill you. 

It had continued to snow throughout the morning, the soft white stuff still falling heavily from the sky as you rushed to your car, you had to get away. You didn’t make it far before Ransom’s arms wrapped around your body from behind, tugging you tightly to his chest. You let out a loud scream before he covered your mouth with his hand. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” He whispered quickly into your ear. “Please stop, I’m sorry.” His large body was bent over your back as you were crouched over trying to get him to release you, both of you breathing heavily as you settled against him. “Y/N I’m sorry.” He slowly started walking the two of you back toward the house, “I’m not gonna hurt you!” He shouted as you tried to bite his hand. He uncovered your mouth, arms loosening. “I’m not gonna hurt you,” He repeated a little more calmly. 

He brought you back into the house, shutting the door softly behind him. You wanted to leave, eyes tearing up. What the fuck were you supposed to do now? Ransom stood for a moment with his back against the door before peeling the wet socks off of his feet. You hadn’t realized that he took his shoes off when he originally came in. His feet were bright red from the cold. You glanced to your left at the knife block there, slowly backing away. 

“No, no, no, I’m not going to hurt you.” He sunk down to his knees. He looked like a fucking idiot, face flushed from the cold, kneeling in front of the door. He slowly made his way over to you, not rising from his knees, shuffling forward with his hands open and facing you. Your heart was racing as he stopped at your feet, slowly moving his arms to wrap around your waist, burying his face in your ratty old college sweatshirt. 

He was hugging you. Actually hugging you, on his knees, face turned into your belly. You could have sworn he whispered, “Please don’t go.” But you couldn’t be sure. 

A pot of coffee was made, coats picked up, and floor mopped before the lawyers and his parents arrived. The only evidence of your earlier fight was the absence of the cartier bracelet you refused to put back on. It sat heavily in Ransom’s pants pocket. Their discussion was loud in the living room and no one looked up as you lay the coffee and finger foods on the coffee table, Ransom’s cup unmade for him out of spite. As you turned to make your way back to the kitchen, Richard’s hand shot out to grab you harm, halting your movements, 

“Grab me some Macallan for me, would you sweetheart?” Your eyes flit over to Ransom, who’s jaw twitched, sharing a look with you before looking back to his lawyers and mother. 

This was none of your business, but you needed to know what your future was going to look like. Were you out of a job? If Ransom went to prison there would be no one to babysit. So yeah, you would be. He admitted on tape to arson and murder. Pre-meditated arson was minimum of 10 years, Murder was 30 years. He’s looking at at least 40 years in prison. He would be an old man before he was even allowed parole. 

The group grew silent, or you couldn’t hear them as you started dinner for that evening. You were sure the four of them would be staying. “Y’N, would you come here please?” That was Linda. 

You made your way over to the group, shuffling nervously in your wool socks. “Yes Mrs. Drysdale?” Linda smiled, 

“It’s back to Thrombey now, but that’s another issue.” Hmmm. “If I was willing to pay you…. Say four times what you’re making now, would you take Ransom’s house arrest? That is, if we are able to work the judge down to that.” 

“House arrest?” You looked to Ransom confused, he wasn’t meeting your eyes. “Murder and Arson-”

“The only proof they have is the recording, the only thing they’re going to be able to pin on Mr. Drysdale here would be the attempted murder of the nurse.” A chill went down your spine, 

“You tried to kill Marta too?” You asked Ransom, incredulously. He didn’t respond, popping a cube of cheese into his mouth. His lawyers made you uncomfortable, they were definitely sleazy and you knew money could get you far in the justice system. If that recording was 75% of the evidence against Ransom and it was suddenly and accidentally destroyed, they would only have what was actually witnessed. 

“Well, would you?” Linda asked again. 

“I uhm… I have a sister who lives with me, I can’t just-”

“I’m sure there’s someone else who can take care of her. How long would it be for?” She looked to the lawyers, “Two or three years?” This was impossible. You couldn’t. Linda looked back at you. “How about this…” She leaned over and clasped your hands softly. “We will pay for your sister’s school, her housing, everything she needs while you’re doing this for us, and you’ll still get paid what I originally offered.”

“If Ransom gets house arrest?” You asked. 

“Yes ‘if’.” She was selling it hard. Julia could stay with your aunt. She didn’t live far from where the two of you currently reside. The majority of your income went to her school, books, clothes, rent, and groceries. Having all of that taken care of would mean you’d be getting four times your current salary and not having to spend any of it. Just for a couple years. 

“If Ransom gets house arrest,” you looked over at him, his eyes briefly meeting yours, studying you it felt like, “If he does, I will do what you need me to do. But I don’t even know how-” Linda’s hands quickly released yours. 

“We will figure that out when the time comes,” Linda has a shit eating grin on her face, “Write up a contract.” Directed at the lawyers, “Now, how are we going to get our hands on that recording?” That’s it. You were dismissed until they needed you again. 

“Why would you do that?” Ransom asked you. Everyone had left a little bit ago, you were busy washing the dishes, knowing as soon as this task was finished you’d be able to go home and this day from hell would be over. 

“Do what?” There was a piece of cheese melted on the side of the casserole dish that wouldn’t fucking come off. 

“Agree to take my punishment?” You paused in your scrubbing, 

“That’s if they actually settle on house arrest.” You finally unwedged the cheese, rinsing off the casserole dish and placing it in the dishwasher. 

“Hmpf.” Ransom had been cold and distant since he burrowed his head into your belly. Has to make up for his extreme weakness then. “But why?” He asked again.

You turned to him, eyes staring directly into his. You watched him fiddling with the gold bracelet you had taken off earlier, it was in his hand down by his side. “It’s what you said earlier right?” You scoffed, removing the rubber gloves from your hands and throwing them in the sink. You walked closer to him, not breaking eye contact. “Because I need the fucking money.” 

The two of you didn’t talk for the rest of the weekend. Usually there was texting here and there, ‘Where are my grey socks, the ones I usually wear with the navy Ralph Lauren slacks?’ or ‘Next week when you meal prep for my weekend can you make me this?’ with a link to a recipe. ‘Pick me up a pack of magnums on your way in.’ Fuck you. 

You got him regular Trojans. 

Monday was Christmas luckily enough, and you knew you weren’t going in. Ransom didn’t even text you to see where you were. His account was rapidly depleting funds, you checked every once in a while. 

234.72 ETRN-STD

523.50 DRNK

435.62 HAWTHNE

The list went on. Multiple spots a day over the weekend. That’s who he was going to be now, the old fucking white dude who sits at a bar all day hitting on girls uncomfortably too young. How many giggling 18 year olds would you kick out crying and screaming the next day? Disgusting.  

“Do you have them?” Them meaning the cookies that were currently at the bottom of your reusable Aldi bag. Your sister, Julia, was off to your right, setting a pot with water on the stove to boil. It was Christmas, just the two of you, and with the aftermath of everything that was going on with the Thrombey/Drysdale clan, you were happy to get some time off to relax. You might even push it so that you wouldn’t have to work tomorrow. We’ll see if Ransom texts you. 

“Of course I do.” This bag has been in your closet all weekend. There’s a bakery near your apartment that your Mom would take you to all the time, every time you got an A, won a game, gotten an award. Everything they made reminded you of her, and it was something you craved more than anything. Every Christmas they would make these fresh baked cookie packs with all kinds, chocolate chip, double chocolate chunk, snicker doodle, gingerbread, white chocolate macadamia, chocolate and peanut butter. 

Every Christmas, after dinner, you and your sister would slouch in front of the TV with scalding hot cups of hot chocolate and devour almost the whole box. Every year except last year when at the time your sister was home alone watching The Grinch you were in a car with Ransom going over a hundred miles an hour and scared for your life. This Christmas, Ransom would not be getting between the two of you, food was cooking, lights in the living room were dimmed. The tree was all lit up and the presents you had exchanged earlier that morning sat unwrapped beneath it. 

Christmas music was playing softly on the tv as you heard someone knock on your front door. 

“Coming!” You yelled. It wasn’t uncommon for a neighbor to have forgotten something, sugar, butter, milk, that they needed for dinner. It wasn’t uncommon for you to answer your door without looking through the peephole. What was uncommon was Ransom Drysdale standing sheepishly on the other side. His cheeks, nose, and eyes were red. The cheeks and nose from the cold, the eyes probably from the alcohol you could smell on him. You sighed heavily, feeling a headache coming on, “What are you doing here?” 

“Bar called me an uber and I didn’t want to go home.” He explained quickly, words slurring slightly. 

“Your parents-”

“Fuck my parents!” He yelled, you quickly shushed him, looking down the halls to see if anyone was peeking out into the hallway. “Fuck my parents.” He said quietly. 

“Ransom…” You sighed, stepping out into the hall, closing the door softly behind you. “What do you want?” His eyes were glazed, he shrugged dumbly, swaying forward. “Okay big guy,” I guess this is happening, “Come on.” You quietly ushered him inside, shutting the door softly behind you. 

“Who is it? Oh, woah.” Julia’s eyes bugged out of her head, shifting over to you. ‘Murderer’ she mouthed. 

“Go set the table.” You ushered Ransom over to the small table that could barely seat the two of you let alone a third, quickly brewing a pot of coffee and keeping an eye on your sister who was scared to get to close to him. “He’s harmless Julia.” You reassured her, or were you reassuring yourself so that you didn’t feel like such a bad guardian, letting a murderer into your home. He was past angry drunk Ransom, which is probably why the bar kicked him out, he was sad Ransom right now. You’d never seen him cry but this was probably the closest you were going to get to it. He was quiet, sat in the chair just staring as you and your sister finished dinner. 

You poured him a cup of coffee and a glass of water, hoping to sober him up enough that you could safely send him home later on. The three of you sat down to eat. Ransom staring listlessly out the window. You made him a plate and told him to eat. And he did. You told him to finish his water. And he did. You told him to finish his coffee. And he did. This was almost terrifying. He hadn’t said anything since ‘fuck my parents’, and he looked dead on his feet. 

“Send him home,” Your sister pleaded. The man hadn’t moved. Cleanup had already started and finished, he was still nursing the third glass of water you’d given him. Cookies were warming in the oven. His eyes were less glassy now. He was slowly sobering up. The large helping of mashed potatoes and three bread rolls he ate didn’t hurt either. 

“He’s my boss, I can’t really kick him out.” You explained, “Let me get him sober enough that I know he’s okay and then he’ll go home.” She rolled her eyes at you, stirring the pot of hot chocolate on the stove, adding more chunks of chocolate to melt. Ransom, still unspeaking, didn’t protest when you moved him into the living room, setting him up in the recliner with his own cup of hot chocolate and three cookies, before snuggling down with your sister and watching How the Grinch Stole Christmas. You moved only once when he tapped the mug against your arm. 

More.

“I’ve never done anything.” He said. “Never went to college, barely graduated high school.” He was rambling to himself, maybe to you? “I’ve spent the entirety of my adult years inside someone’s cunt.” 

“Alright, Julia. Time for bed.” You ignored her whining protests. The movie wasn’t over yet. “Please?” You begged her. She hated Ransom. You knew this. She knows you know this. ‘All he does is take you from me.’ is what she once said to you. Just to treat you like shit. 

“I have no money.” Ransom’s eyes met yours. “None.” 

“I know Ransom.” He scoffed. 

“I’m no better off than you now.” 

“You still have your house. I’d say you are still better off.” You started cleaning up around him, letting the asshole sit in his self-pity. 

“C’mere.” It was a quiet request. The Grinch was packing up his sleigh in the background. You dropped the two mugs you were holding onto the counter, circling back to the recliner. Ransom’s hand came out soft, wrapping around your forearm and gently guiding you to sit in his lap.

“Ransom, I don’t think this is appropriate.” You tried to pull away, heartbeat beginning to pick up. His still bloodshot eyes raised to meet yours. 

“Please hold me.” Fuck. What were you supposed to do with that? Heart melting you sunk into his lap, wrapping your arms around him and pulling him in tight. It was quiet for a while. Sitting with the credits rolling, Ransom’s arms wrapped around your waist while yours were wrapped around his shoulders. Comforting him from whatever crisis he was currently going through. 

“Marta ruined everything” He whispered into your neck. 

“No Ransom, you did.” 

2020

The trial, fuck me, the trial. The whole fucking family showed to watch Ransom crash and burn and get exactly what he deserved. Well that and to stare down Marta Cabrera who sat with the prosecution in some shiny new digs, a stunning gold cartier bracelet on her wrist. That was familiar. Ransom’s cheap bought apology. There was a tension there, you knew. He always had a thing for ‘the help’. You wondered if that’s where he had been this past week. But it’s strange isn’t it? This whole situation. It was unsettling and for some reason you felt irreversibly used.  

“I knew the knife was a prop.” And that was that. Audio recording gone, attempted murder charge whittled down to aggravated assault. A slap on the wrist. Two years of house arrest. And here you were, in Ransom’s home with a fucking house arrest bracelet making your ankle itch. Unfucking believable. Ransom had sat in the courtroom, head raised, armani suit, legs crossed and body relaxed. He knew he was getting out of this from the minute he walked in. 

The Thrombey trial that was supposedly going to last three months only lasted a week. You still had a job, and in a remarkable turn of events Linda Drysdale and their legal team got exactly what they predicted. 

“I’m going out.” Was the first thing Ransom told you as you unpacked your clothes. He had half thought to buy you a bed and a small dresser that he haphazardly got someone to shove between his Pam Anderson Baywatch poster and the unplugged Space Invaders original arcade console. This was a 90s teenage boy’s dream bedroom. And now it was yours. He didn’t give you much time to respond and he was gone. 

They say that you never really know someone until you live with them. And you’ve never felt that saying more true. Ransom was a fucking asshole. 

During your previous employment schedule you would come in at 9 am with breakfast and let him know of anything he needed to do that day, if his Mom needed him for whatever reason, events his was scheduled to go to, dates he promised he’d keep. He’d let you know what to cancel and what he would get ready for, and then you were off. Cleaning and maintaining the home to the best of your ability, binge watching tv shows, trying new recipes from pinterest. 

Ransom was disgusting. 

Clothes discarded all over his floor, bedroom, living room, hallways. Beard trimmings all over the sink and what you would hopefully assume were more beard trimmings lining the bottom of his shower. You really didn’t want to think about Ransom’s pubic hair situation. He would do things like take his coffee mugs into his room or into the study and leave like a sip left in each one, letting it sit there until the milk began to curdle. Wet towels shoved into corners and every morning when you went in to make his bed it was like he was running in his sleep, loose and fitted scrunched in the corner of the foot board, duvet thrown off and pillows with half off shams. 

He was doing this shit on purpose. 

And you hated him for it. 

It wasn’t long after the trial that he began a steady routine. Gym, breakfast, some puttering around the house, making plans and then he would go out. And that’s when we come to this, 

“He said he would be back and we would have breakfast together.” The girl was pretty, but her voice was annoying. 

“I’m one hundred percent sure he did not say that.” You stood with arms crossed in the doorway, watching her fix her face in the mirror propped against his bedroom wall. An old antique thing that didn’t match with the decor of the house at all. 

“Hmpf.” She glared at you, “Fine, when he gets back, we’ll see who is right.” This was before you became practiced at this kind of thing. 

You felt your phone buzz in the pocket of your jeans, 

Is she gone yet? 

Fucking prick. 

“I’ll have him call you when he gets in,” You explained, “He has a lot to do today, I’m sure if he said you’ll go out for breakfast it’ll probably be another day.” 

“I said.” She stepped up to you, “I’m staying.” Fuck. You rolled your eyes and walked past her into the room, 

Not leaving, come deal with her yourself

He had been waiting down the street like a psycho, waiting to see her leave so he can come back home, but it’s not really working out in his favor. You could feel her eyes on you as you made the bed and picked his laundry up from the floor, tossing them two feet away into the laundry basket you left in his bathroom in hopes he would actually use it. The socks left discarded beside it was a clear message of disregard, a ‘fuck you’ from a petulant child. 

You could hear the door slam downstairs. Great, you looked at the girl who was scrolling through her phone curled up in the reading chair in the corner of his room, he’s pissed. You could hear his stomping feet climb the stairs and the girl looked up from her phone hopeful towards the door. 

“Alright, time to go.” He huffed, coming into view. The girl stood from the chair, shifting over towards him and trying to wrap her arms around his neck. “Nope. Let’s go, your uber is here.” 

“But, I-” She began, you could see tears welling up in her eyes and you began to feel bad for her. 

You were never one to have one night stands. You had one serious boyfriend when you were in college, but when your Mom got sick you had ended it and moved back home. You hadn’t dated or been with anyone else since. You just didn’t have the time. That being said, this girl honestly thought Ransom had a heart. She was naive and young, younger than you. Your heart hurt for her, but honestly, no one should be with Ransom anyway. 

His birthday dinner had soon come and gone. Linda and Richard sat around the dinner table eating Ransom’s favorite foods you’d spent the day cooking for him. Drinking whiskey and wine, Ransom’s glass never empty. You’d had a few glasses yourself with the tapas style dinner you’d put together. A beautifully iced spice cake sitting on the counter with unlit candles for dessert. 

This was the night that Ransom blew up on you for the last time. The night he cried into your neck, drunk and unstable. Clutching desperately at your body for comfort, burying himself against you all touch starved and needy. This was more intense than last Christmas where his dry eyed stare begged you to hold him in an uncommon moment of weakness. 

He was so hard to read sometimes and you were never quite sure where you stood. You knew you really hated him sometimes, other times… not so much. The more you knew his parents, the more you understood why Ransom was an ungrateful shit to begin with. You almost couldn’t blame him for how he turned out.

Almost. 

“Help me with this.” He stood in the doorway to the small office he never used. It was pretty much just for show. A large wooden ornate desk, his macbook, and a bookshelf full of books you know he probably never read. Including the ones penned by his own Grandfather. 

There were beginnings here. Multi-colored post its lined the desk, laptop left on the seat of one of the chairs in the room. 

“What is this?” You asked him, fingers plucking a post-it from the desk,

Crime of Passion?

He had been watching a lot of true crime documentaries lately. It didn’t help but creep you out. This man, a murderer, suddenly extremely into serial killers and murder itself. 

“I’m going to write a book.” He explained. His face was in a grin, almost giddy. 

“A book.” You looked at him incredulously. Your eyes drifted over to Harlan’s novels sitting stacked on another chair, spines finally cracked and pages thumbed through, sticky tabs stuck throughout the pages. You pointed to them, “A book?”

“Yeah,” He gestured around to the post-its, “What do you think?” It’ll keep him busy that’s for sure. You sighed, sticking the post-it back on the desk and looked at him. He was waiting, expectantly, why did he care what you thought about this?

“Is it gonna be about Fran?” You asked awkwardly, he scoffed,

“No, I’m gonna write books like my Grandfather wrote,” He plucked a post-it from the desk, showing you,

Wife murders husband?

“I’m gonna write a mystery novel.” 

He was good. You couldn’t lie about that. And you wouldn’t. This was a strange thing. The routine changed. Gym, breakfast, writing, lunch, writing, dinner, and then he would go out. His mind was moving faster than his fingers could and you were left reading a new chapter or two every night. You’d once loved Harlan’s novels. Your Mother was obsessed with them. It was partially why you had even taken the job tutoring Meg in the first place, but you know what they say. Never meet your heroes. 

Harlan was kind in some ways, funny, but proud. His pride is what eventually killed him you’ve found out. The medicine Ransom had switched wasn’t his cause of death, his refusal for help was. 

Ransom was as good as he was, better even. 

“He’s got a lot of me in him,” Harlan said to you once, “He could have everything I’ve ever had if he would pull his head out of his ass.” 

This was promising. 

You were honestly afraid when Ransom first said he would be writing a novel. What if he wasn’t a good writer? Could you really lie and try to support him even though it was absolute garbage? You supposed you would have to. You were relieved to find out that it was unnecessary. 

He slipped a red pen into your hand when handing you this last chapter, the book almost finished. “I want to see how you react to everything,” He explained, the book was coming to the climax, you were a chapter away from the big reveal and the aftermath, his hands gently massaged your shoulders before he bent at the waist, wrapping his arms around you from behind as you sat on the sofa. “Do you like it?” His hot breath brushed against your ear, a tingle went down your spine. 

“Ransom,” Your hand came up to lay over his forearm, brushing the skin with your thumb, “It’s amazing.” You could almost feel the grin that stretched across his face, he turned, pressing his face into your hair where you could swear he laid a soft kiss before releasing you. 

“Of course it is,” Here we go, “I’m a fucking Thrombey.” His fucking smirk. That's what he left you with, returning to his office to pound out the last two chapters. 

It was a process. The editing, printing, shipping off to multiple publishers. He got replies after a month. 

Eager replies. 

Whatever Ransom wanted, Ransom got. The lucky bastard stayed lucky.

“Look Babe.” Ransom dropped a heavy box on the table in front of you, “Look at this shit.” He grabs a knife from the block on the counter, slipping it under the packing tape to open the box revealing glossy black covers. He first fucking novel. There. Printed. A picture of a fireplace, chair facing it, empty. A blood soaked carpet. He picked one from the box, opening it. And there in the forward, the dedication, Harlan’s name…

...and yours. 

“Don’t get all big headed about it kid.” He smirked. Your heart was racing in your chest. 

“Why would you…” Your fingers gently traced the letters of your name, there in print, as it would be on every copy sold. 

“Wouldn’t have been able to write it without you being chained to my house, only seems fair.” He shrugged. “We can call it even.” You scoffed,

“Dedicating your book to me hardly makes my doing your house arrest for you even Ransom.” He smirked again, flipping through the pages, seeing his words in bold print. 

“I think it’s plenty fair,” Okay, now you wanted to smack him, “You live here for free, you eat here for free, and you get paid pretty well to do so.” His devilish eyes met yours over the top of the book he was still thumbing through. “If anything you’re still ahead because you’re the kept woman of a bestselling author.” 

“A kept woman?” You dropped the book onto the table. “I’m not your fucking whore Ransom.” 

“Not yet.” Audibly you made noise of protest, internally your core thrummed with heat. 

“Never.” You packed up your tablet and the new book, attempting to walk around him to go sit out by the fire pit for a while. His large hand gently grabbed your upper arm, tugging you into his body, wrapping his arms around your shoulders, your arms trapped between you.

“Tell me you’re proud of me.” He whispered into your hair, his voice suddenly soft, heartbreaking. 

“I am proud of you Ransom.” You shifted your belongings to your left hand, tugging your right from against his chest to wrap around his torso. “I’m very proud of you.” 

Book published, royalties rolling in, Ransom was making his own money now. He was more cocky than ever. Proud. The, I-don’t-need-you-anymore-mom, attitude. But can you still pay my babysitter? The girls came more easily than ever before, not that they didn’t come easy before the bestseller. 

Every. Night. 

Sometimes two girls were leaving in the morning, gently ushered out the door with promises of a phone call and a, “I’ll let him know.” It made you feel dirty, betraying almost. Like you were supposed to be on these girl’s side instead of cleaning up after Ransom’s mess. 

You could gag. The milky condoms, two of them, tossed haphazardly aside on the hardwood floor of Ransom’s bedroom. Disgusting. You could hear him laughing at you now. 

“It could be you,” He says, “Just say the word.” If you weren’t so irritated with Ransom for this very thing your panties would be dripping with the thought. 

He’s sitting at the kitchen island forking soft scrambled eggs into his mouth, cheesy with peppers and onions, the way he likes them, the way you made them, when you come downstairs. “You could at least throw the condoms in the fucking trash Ransom.” He looked up from his eggs to you, peeling off the latex gloves you’d just used, smirking. 

“Where’s the fun in that?” Asshole. 

“You’re disgusting.” You begin on the dishes, taking a sip of your now lukewarm coffee. You hear the stool scoot back against the floor, “That wasn’t an invitation.” You said, hearing his approach. His arms wrapped around your middle as you began to scrub. His head rested on your shoulder. 

“You love me.” He slowly rocked your body side to side, “You love how disgusting I am.” You tried to shrug him off of you, but he held you tighter. Since last Christmas when you curled up in his lap and held him for two hours until he was sober enough to leave you he’d been slowly getting more and more affectionate with you. He was touch starved, hungry for it. The intimacy of holding and being held. 

You didn’t picture Linda as much of a hugger.

The house was decorated. It was the least he could do for you really. This was the first Christmas since your Mother died that you and your sister wouldn’t be completing your tradition, but you tried not to think about it. Ransom humored you just after Thanksgiving, bringing home a fake Christmas tree, ornaments and lights. You’d ordered a couple of extras online and three stockings were on the mantle, Christmas lights lined the windows giving the house a warm glow. 

“I’m sending everyone in my family a copy.” He told you, “a signed copy.” Of his book. Rubbing their noses in it. The book has firmly held the number one spot on the New York Times Bestseller List for weeks. Already over a million copies have been sold. Whether its due to the fame of the not-murder trial or Harlan’s legacy you couldn’t be sure, but even without those things the book was incredibly good. 

Ransom could have made it on his own, a long time ago. 

“You don’t think that’s a little crass?” He released you long enough for you to finish loading the dishwasher, watching you place the pod of soap and shut it like he didn’t realize that’s actually what you’re supposed to do. 

“Fuck them,” He scoffed, “They’ve always hated me.” 

“To be fair,” You turned to the soft sweater clad man leaning against the kitchen island, “You’re an asshole.” 

He smirked, “Yeah, but that’s why I’m so charming.” You couldn’t help but roll your eyes. 

It could almost be domestic. The way things were now. So different from before. Yeah Ransom was still bringing a new girl home almost every night and sure you could hear them fuck from your bed on the other side of the wall, but for the most part it was always just the two of you. 

His parents never ventured out here much anymore, since his book was published he had a deadline for the next book that needed to be completed so he wrote almost every day now, sometimes for hours. You made his every meal, on the odd occasion you’d order out. Sometimes when he needed a break he would come sit on the sofa with you as you watched whatever show you were currently obsessed with. One time you walked in on him watching Love Island by himself and you hadn’t let him live it down yet, maybe not ever. 

He grew soft, sweet almost. A kiss against your palm. Hugs from behind as you worked at the stove. A snuggle of feet under his thigh as you watched Miracle on 34th Street by a crackling fire. Wordlessly anticipating each others needs. It spoke to a high level of intimacy. Something you both chose to ignore. 

It was nice. 

He didn’t go out on Christmas Eve. Not only because his usual bar was closing earlier than normal because of the holiday, he assured you, but because he wanted to stay in. Snow was falling thick outside, a foot of it already blanketed on the ground. To tell the truth you didn’t want him to go out in this weather anyway. You knew he was willing to drive a little drunk and he didn’t exactly obey speed limits. It was safer here. 

You were still reeling from the argument you had with your sister earlier in the night. You called her to see what she was doing, but she was at a friends house and wanted nothing to do with you. Since the house arrest you haven’t exactly been on speaking terms. She wasn’t Ransom’s biggest fan and didn’t really understand why you needed to do this. You could kind of blame it on yourself for her having no idea how much money you needed to keep her in school, her cello and lessons weren’t cheap and nor are the electronics she seemed so attached to. This two year sentence you were playing out for Ransom would put you in the green, far in the green, so far in the green that you were willing to put up with all his petty bullshit and be okay with your sister hating you if it meant your futures were secure. 

After all this was over, you might just be able to go back to school. 

“Are you hungry?” You removed your feet from their spot beneath his thigh, grabbing both of your now empty mugs, padding over to the kitchen. Your stomach had just begun to growl. The stew you had simmering on the stove was ready to eat. 

“Yeah,” Ransom replied, not turning away from the television. Santa’s trial had just began. It was a strange thing, having him watch classic Christmas movies, soft in sweats and a comical christmas sweater you jokingly bought him. “I look good in anything.” He said. He wasn’t lying. 

You poured two bowls full, bringing over a plate with some crusty bread he was kind enough to go out and grab for you earlier in the day. “Thank you,” He said softly as he took the bowl from your hands, eyes still not moving from the screen. He quickly spooned some into his mouth, 

“It’s hot.” You said, his only reaction being trying to rapidly cool it in his mouth, his tongue probably burned. He gave you a glare, before resting the bowl on the coffee table. This could almost be a relationship. The two of you together. In this oddly domestic moment. He was the only man in your life right now, it wasn’t like you had many options for seeking others. 

That’s why you would get so hot and bothered with him. And that’s the only reason. 

He had never seen A Miracle on 34th Street before. You’d think with how old fashioned Harlan was he would have at least seen it once or twice, but then again, any time spent together as a family was always strained and argumentative. 

Even when he was a kid though? He was the first grandchild. His mother was the first child of Harlan. You were sure when he was a child he was spoiled rotten, more toys than he could play with, never wanting for anything. But that wasn’t exactly true. The touch starved trust-fund baby didn’t get the one thing kids need the most, more than presents, toys, electronics. Real genuine love. 

His Mother loved him to an extent. It’s why you were the one on house arrest instead of him, but she thought loving him meant giving him whatever he wants. When we all know that’s not what kids want. They want to be told no, given structure, rules. How many times have you gotten into arguments with your sister because you didn’t allow her to go roam the streets at night without supervision or give her money for some stupid thing she wouldn’t be even bothered with in two weeks?

But you could also see how no one really knows how to raise a child and you just try your best. Having Harlan for a Father couldn’t have been easy. 

Under the tree that you’d decorated and in the stockings you’d hung were presents. Ransom had everything he’d ever wanted, but you couldn’t help but want him to have something to open tomorrow morning. Granted it wouldn’t be much, but it’s the thought that counts. In the fridge you already have most of what will go into tomorrow’s dinner made. Hopefully your sister thinks about your extended invitation and Ransom can go pick her up at some point tomorrow. You missed her, a lot. Your heart ached with wishes that she was here right now. 

Ransom’s eyes had gotten shifty. The movie was coming to an end and his bowl was empty. “Did you want more?” You asked him, thinking that would be the cause of his shiftiness, maybe indecisive? 

“No.” He cleared his throat, “I’m not going to be home for dinner tomorrow.” You weren’t sure you heard that properly.

“You’re not going to be home….” You started, picking his bowl up from the coffee table and standing, “For dinner on Christmas?” 

He was scared to tell you, that’s cute. Your body was bristling with anger as you took the stew off the stove to cool before you could properly store it. He didn’t move from his spot on the couch. 

“My Mother wants me to go to this dinner with-” 

“So every other time your Mother wants you to do something it’s ‘fuck you’ and ‘eat shit’, but when we’ve already made plans for tomorrow and my sister-” You felt tears prickle in your eyes. “What the fuck Ransom?” His face was stoic from the couch. 

“Why does it matter?” He asked, “I stayed home tonight!”

“And that makes up for it?” You stood at the kitchen counter, staring across the room at him. “I already started on dinner, Ransom. You couldn’t have maybe said something while I was prepping all of this?” You gestured to the fridge. He shrugged. 

“I didn’t know that was all for tomorrow.” His face still betrayed no expression. 

“She can come here,” You offered, “We can have dinner here.” His eyes shifted away from yours to watch the rolling credits. 

“She doesn’t want to.” He stood from the couch, rounding towards the tree slowly, searching. 

“Why not?” He was being shady about this, the whole situation was strange. “I already have all of this food prepared and I can’t pick up Julia myself… Ransom?” 

“She doesn’t like being around you.” He stated honestly, he picked a box out among the presents under the tree, eyes meeting yours as he fumbled with it. 

“What?” You get it. She’s technically your employer. But she’s never had any issue dropping in for dinner or putting you to work on some task for herself. 

“Listen,” He came closer to where you still stood, your chest tightening. “Y/N, I hate my family-”

“Then why are you going to-”

“I have to do this.” His cheeks were flushed, you could tell he was uncomfortable. “My therapist… I don’t want to do this.” He slid the box across the counter top. “I don’t want to go, but I have to.” 

“Is this supposed to make me feel better about it?” You scoffed, picking up the gold wrapped box. His mouth opened and then quickly shut without speaking. You sighed heavily, a headache coming on. “I’ve got nothing, Ransom. All I wanted to do tomorrow was spend some time with my family and if you’re not going to be around…” 

“I know, I can maybe go pick your sister up in the morning?” He offered. Your eyes watery, staring at him. He doesn’t get it. Your heart was aching a bit. 

“You’re such an asshole.” You spat, leaving the present still wrapped in front of you, thumbing the thick wrapping paper. 

“I know.” He swallowed. 

“What does your therapist want you to do?” You never talked about what went on in his therapy sessions. He was too closed off after them, drank too heavily, lashed out too easily. You’d let him slowly work through his refractory period and let him cozy up to you once he was feeling better. 

Ransom felt awkward, you could feel it. He was uncomfortable. 

“Why does this matter so much to you?” He asked. He was turning. He got too emotional. “It doesn’t matter what I have to do or where I have to do it. I said I would go pick Julia up, I’m giving you what you want.” 

“Fine.” You were staring each other down. “I’ll let her know you’ll be there to get her around noon and then you can go have dinner with the people you hate.” He rolled his eyes, 

“I don’t know what you think this is, Y/N.” He scoffed, “You still work for me, we’re not playing house here.” 

“Then stop making me.” You spat back at him, both of you in a similar stance, hands gripping the edge of the stone counter top. 

“I’m not making you do anything.” There was a rage growing in his eyes. 

“You are, Ransom. I take care of you like you’re my own fucking child. I clean up all of your messes, I cook all of your fucking food, I do everything for you.” 

“I don’t ask you to.”

“You don’t have to! You literally just expect it of me.” You yelled. 

“Because it’s your job.” He laughed, throwing his hands into the air. “I have no loyalty to you Y/N. None.” Fine.

Fine.

You hated him. You fucking hated him. You were doing all of this for him. And you’ve never felt more dumb in your life. The house arrest bracelet on your ankle felt heavier than ever. It itches like mad. 

“Fuck you Ransom.” You rounded the counter, moving towards the stairs when he grabbed your arm. 

“Take the gift.” He slapped the box into your hand. 

“I don’t want the fucking gift, Hugh.” He looked taken aback for a moment.

“Don’t call me that.” His hand fell from your arm, stepping closer to you. 

“That’s what you want, right?” You asked, “You want me to do all of these things for you and take care of you and fucking hold you when you need comfort but when I’m fucking trying to make things easier for you, you’re all the sudden ‘I have no loyalty to you.” 

“Wait a fucking minute,” He growled, “I take care of you too. Who the fuck buys all the shit you want on a fucking whim? You’re in the mood for curry, I get you curry. You make a comment about how you really want to decorate for Christmas and who fucking gets you everything you need to do that? You say that you really want to get into fucking knitting and who gets you all the fucking shit you need to fucking knit?” 

“Buying me things doesn’t mean you care about me Ransom.” You shook the box in your hand for emphasis. “All I wanted to know is what your therapist wants you to do tomorrow, you can go have dinner with your Mother. It’s fine. I just wanted you to fucking open up to me.” 

“I am open with you!” He yells, “You know more about me than anyone else in my fucking life, it’s hard for me okay? I can never escape you, you’re always fucking there. I don’t get to fucking-” He placed his hands on his hips, turning from you. He let out a heavy, slow breath. Calming himself down. “I don’t want to go tomorrow, trust me Y/N, I really don’t, but I have to.” His eyes met yours, softer this time. 

You felt like some part of you was being irrational. This dinner might help his growth. Whatever milestone he was reaching with his therapist, this could be really good for him. But you also felt a little selfish, you wanted him here, with you. You felt more like his family than anyone else. Or at least, he felt more like your family and he should be here to spend Christmas with his family. You knew he felt at least somewhat the same, if the gifts addressed to Julia under the tree from him were anything to go by. You wanted him here, but he wasn’t yours. 

“I’m sorry.” You whispered, the tears that were once threatening to spill, now did. “It’s fine.” Your head was pounding. “It’s fine.” 

“I know it’s not,” He said softly. “But we can maybe do presents and lunch before I go,” He gestured towards the tree. “I should be back in time for the Grinch.” You were shaking a bit as he approached you, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you tightly against his body. “I’m sorry baby.” He was so warm, a little sweaty from arguing, but warm. “I’ll make it up to you.” A soft whisper into your hair. 

The little gold box was soon opened, a new rose gold cartier bracelet slipped onto your wrist and Ransom left you and your sister the next day wearing the sweater you had so carefully knit for him. 

2021

Your breath hitched in your throat, back arching, a loud moan breaking from your lungs. How was he so good at this? Ransom’s tongue was at work between your thighs, large hands cradling your hips, burying his face in your moist heat. You were so close to cumming. And he knew it. 

“Oh god,” you moaned, bucking your hips into his face as you rode your orgasm until your body was too sensitive to continue, Ransom moving his attentions to press his lips sloppily against your thighs before making his way up your body. 

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he lamented as he pressed his lips to your flushed cheeks and panting mouth, parting your thighs fully around his hips to tease your opening with the blunt head of his cock. “So fucking beautiful.” He moaned into your open mouth as he breeches you. 

He felt so fucking good. You’d never get over it, you were sure. Ransom was patient, biding his time. He wasn’t that guy who had to be as deep inside you as possible, chasing his orgasm by stabbing your cervix. Over time he mapped out the location of your g-spot, shifting his hips and cock to brush against the spot with every thrust, working you up and making your eyes roll back in your head. 

Those girls screamed with good reason. Just as you did now. Gushing wet around him as you came for the second time, looking up wantonly into his flushed face, lips swollen from first kissing and then pulling you apart with his tongue. Your fingers curled in his chest hair as he picked up pace, chasing his own release now, your hips lifting off the bed to aid him.

“So fucking good baby,” His eyes screwed shut as he moans, arms trembling, “You fuck me so good baby.” He sat back on his haunches, pulling your hips roughly to his, your sensitive clit grinding against his pubic bone almost bringing you over again as he cums. Hips stuttering into yours as you feel him empty himself into you. 

His head tilted towards the ceiling, eyes dropping to find you, hands still gripping your hips and as much of your ass as he can manage. “I love you.” 

It never gets old. 

He said those words to you ever chance he got. It was as if he was trying to make up for a lifetime without it. Love. 

Early morning sleepy soft kisses, I love you.

Silent breakfast with your feet in his lap, I love you.

Scratching his back as you peered over his shoulder while he was writing, I love you. 

Feet stuffed under his thigh watching Outlander and drinking hot tea, I love you.

Buried deep inside you, panting mouths a breath apart, bodies flushed and sweaty, sheets damp with cum, I love you.

“I think you’re the only person I’ve ever loved.” 

It was intense. His love for you.

He tried hard. He didn’t know how it was supposed to work. A real relationship, a real honest to god loving relationship. But he was trying. 

The first few months of the relationship you gained a lot of new jewelry, a new iPad, clothes, shoes. “You don’t have to buy me things to prove that you love me, Ransom.” 

Then came flowers and lots of them. Sometimes just one, sometimes a bouquet. Regardless there were multiple vases that stayed filled throughout the house, always with fresh flowers never given time to fully wilt. 

After that was the touching. Always some sort of physical contact. Whether you were cuddling on the couch or a blink away from sleep with his ankle wrapped around yours, if you were in a room together there was always some sort of contact. 

Your house arrest bracelet was removed, and a gold anklet replaced it. You were free to leave, live on your own. Move out and back into that shitty apartment with your sister, but this was early days in the newfound relationship with Ransom. 

He’d bought you a house. 

He’s paying for your sisters school.

He’s paying you to still work for him.

It was a Victorian. The house. Not at all like his contemporary cube he knew you despised. A rich dark brown with a large porch. Much too big for just you and your sister, so 6 months after the two of you moved in, Ransom sold his house and moved in too. 

Julia was warming up to him. At first she wasn’t a fan. It took a long time, many dinners with Ransom, ‘family outings’, you hoped she could see the way he treated you now. The way he’s kind of always treated you. Her love was easily bought with the new house, her latest generation iPhone and the fact that she now had a monthly allowance. It didn’t stop you from making her get an after school job at the school library though. 

Now with a house of your own, you were doing something you’d always dreamed of. Watching Ransom try to hang Christmas lights. 

“I’ll just pay someone to do it,” He offered, looking skeptically at the boxes you had placed on the dining room table, “I’m not going up there to do it.” 

But there he was, up there doing it while you looked up at him from the bottom of the ladder. “This is the fucking worst.” He exclaimed, taking the light clips and attaching them to the roof. “Why are we doing this?” 

“Because you love me and you want to make me happy.” You laughed. He rolled his eyes, squinting against the sun. 

“I’m not so sure,” He attached a few more clips within reach before steadily climbing down the ladder. “I think you’re trying to kill me.” 

“I’m the beneficiary on your life insurance right?” You jokingly asked as his feet hit the ground. He laughed at your bad joke, 

“I think that’s in pretty poor taste, but…” He pressed a kiss to your forehead, “Yes.” 

“Julia should be home soon and then we can decorate the tree,” You wrapped your arms around his middle, capturing his lips with your own, “And make some cookies,” You kissed him again, 

“And have a drink.” He smirked against your lips. 

“You have a therapy appointment today,” You walked over to the steps, “You’re not having anything to drink.” He rolled his eyes at you once more, shooing you into the house as he re-positioned the ladder to go back up and finish stringing the lights. 

You had to be proud of him. Court mandated therapy ended when your house arrest did, but he still went every week. At first it was due to a little pushing by you, but eventually he made the appointments on his own. He was getting better. Still a dick, but that was his nature. He wasn’t quick to anger anymore, his emotions took a more level head. And he was now publishing books twice a year. He’s got five books out now, and almost 100 million copies sold. Which is incredible. 

You started back to school, Ransom wanting to start his own publishing company, “I’m paying for you to go to business school as an investment in our future.” He claimed. Once you were done with school your job would be to then help him open his own publishing company where you’d overlook everything. A daunting task, but it was hard not to believe in yourself when Ransom made himself your own personal cheerleader. “You’re brilliant,” He would say, “You’re so smart, you’ve just been dealt a bad hand until now.” 

And now he was stacking that hand to the best of his ability. 

Finals had been last week and you still marveled at the fact that as you poured over your last assignments and studying, Ransom would make you coffee and massage your shoulders whereas you would usually do the same for him as he was finishing a book. 

You’d gone to a couple therapy sessions with him, the first time he’d invited you was strange and you didn’t know what would even be discussed, but as you sat in the session and he was finally completely bare to you, you couldn’t help but feel like it was his idea and not his therapist’s. 

That session changed the dynamic between the two of you for sure. 

After the dam broke, the two of you having sex for the first time and Ransom’s admission of love it wasn’t easy. He was still an asshole and as someone who had never been in a relationship before, this first real relationship, he didn’t really know how to behave. 

You had one session a month together and it was probably one of the best ideas Ransom ever had. 

He was a little sullen when he came home later that night, coming to curl himself around you as you placed the cookies you and Julia had baked earlier into the decorative metal tins you had just bought. 

Sometimes it was like this, sadness. His lips gently pressing themselves against your cheek, his body tightly pressed against yours trying to pull as much comfort as he possibly could. “I don’t want to talk about it,” He whispered softly, “Not yet.” 

“Okay.” You knew what he needed and what he needed was a little bit of time. You offered him a cookie, chocolate and peanut butter, still warm. He took it gently from your fingers, pulling away to go to his study, but not before pulling you into a soft lingering kiss. An apology for what you knew would be a distant night. A ‘I don’t know when I’ll be coming to bed’ night. You were sure you’d have three new chapters to go over in the morning.

You loved the snow. Almost a foot of it had fallen overnight, frosting the windows and giving your home a beautiful Christmas glow. It made your home feel cozy and well slept as you stretched your limbs out, hand coming to run across Ransom’s back. So he did come to bed after all. You rolled over to face him, laying on his belly, arms folded under his pillow facing you. 

God he is beautiful. 

You hated it about him. So handsome. You brushed his fallen hair out of his face, pressing a kiss to his scrunched brow. He was letting his beard grow out for the winter. It made him even more attractive, the bastard. 

Julia was just getting up for school, standing in the kitchen in her uniform, eating toast and facetiming a friend. She was in a carpool, this house you lived in, while comfortably distanced from others, was in a neighborhood of other kids that went to her same school. Something you’re sure Ransom took into account when buying this house in the first place. You drove the kids to school on Friday when you didn’t have any classes. Today was a different parent’s turn. 

“Can I take some of these to school?” She asked, picking up a tin of cookies. 

“Yeah, but take the red one.” You popped a k-cup into the keurig. “Those haven’t touched any nuts.” 

“Mila’s Mom said we can go to the mall after school to go get presents for the pollyanna our class is having, is that okay?” She was such a good kid. Getting older now, she was almost ready to learn how to drive, something you’d been dreading, but for whatever reason Ransom was really looking forward to. 

“You have money still?” You asked, preparing a second cup of coffee for the sleeping bear upstairs. 

“I mean,” She smirked, “Unless you want to give me more…?” You rolled your eyes, turning towards your younger sibling. 

“What time will you be home?” The car had just pulled up outside, horn letting out a quick ‘honk’ to let her know they were here. 

Julia shrugged, hugging you, “We might get dinner, but probably no later than 8. I’ll text you.” She shrugged her coat on, opening the front door as you called behind her, 

“Text me when you get to the mall and when you’re on your way home!” 

“Okay!” She yelled back, trudging through the snow to the car.

“Keep your location on!” You could almost feel her roll her eyes at you, 

“Okay!” Annoyed this time.

“I love you!” You shouted as she got in the car, slamming the door behind her. Your phone chimed with reply, 

love you too

With that you went to rouse the sleeping man upstairs. 

He groaned unhappily when you woke him up, but it was quickly soothed by the coffee you’d supplied him with. 

Christmas was quickly approaching. The first Christmas you’d be spending together as a real, honest to god, family. In your own home, ready to begin your own traditions. The house was beautifully decorated and almost always smelled like cookies and a Christmas movie or music was always playing in the background. 

There was a truly sweet moment you’d wanted to commit to memory for the rest of your life. Julia rolling out cookie dough, Christmas music blaring obnoxiously loud and Ransom coming out from his study yelling, 

“I can’t write anything in a house this loud!” Walking over to the sound system and turning it down to a soft ambling. Your sister and you looking at him and laughing, the red faced lumberjack quickly losing steam as he realized he was wearing the hideous Christmas sweater you’d jokingly bought him last year. “It’s the warmest sweater I own.” He claimed. Sure. Sure it is. 

He turned the music back up a little louder, coming to a happy medium. His embarrassment waning as he looked at the two of you in the kitchen. A family that didn’t argue with every other word. People who genuinely loved each other. Something he never knew he wanted or needed. He came over to you, gently clasping your hands before tugging you into his body to ridiculously dance around to Jingle Bell Rock. The three of you peeling with laughter. Was this even real life anymore? With a soft parting kiss and a peak over your sisters shoulder to steal some cookie dough he was reluctantly walking back to his study, coming to join you twenty minutes later after finishing the chapter he’d been working on all day. 

The three of you spent the rest of the night in the living room, watching the cheesy A Christmas Prince series on Netflix and eating what was sure your body weight in popcorn. Cozy with your little family. 

“Do you think she’d like a puppy?” Ransom whispered into your neck one night. 

“Do not.” You were close to sleep, just about to drift off, when his question stirred you awake. 

“I always wanted a puppy when I was a kid.” He pressed a kiss against your neck, fingers gently tugging your nipple. 

“I’ll be the one taking care of it,” You whimpered as his other hand sunk between your thighs, “Do not get her a puppy.” His lips met your shoulder and you turned in his arms, thighs parting as he lightly stroked your clit. 

“You’ll get there.” He pressed his lips against yours, teasing your entrance with his fingers, his now hard cock nudging against your thigh. “You’ll warm up to the idea.” 

“No…” You whined, his fingers beginning to stroke your g-spot, his body coming to lay over yours, his eyes half lidded and lips wet and red came to meet yours as he removed his fingers and replaced them with his cock. “Fuck.” His fingers laced themselves through yours, pressing your hands against the sheets as he began to rock his hips slowly into yours. 

“You’re so sweet on me baby,” He mouthed against your lips, “So sweet on us.” He moaned. Your hips ground against his with every thrust. This slow love making that was making you gush around him, pussy making obscene sounds with every tilt of his hips, gently brushing the parts of you that make your legs shake. He chest close to yours, the begging in his eyes, 

“You’ll be such a good mother,” His hips met yours a little harder on that one causing you to gasp, pussy clenching around him. “Gonna give me what I want for Christmas?” He asked. He did this sometimes, knowing you were still on birth control and the actual relationship was still relatively new, the two of you had been together for almost a year now, you knew that he’d been toying with the idea of having a baby. You’d talked about it in therapy recently. 

“I love you,” He moaned, his hips build up a little speed as your legs came to wrap high around his waist. “I can’t wait,” He groaned, “So good to me.” His lips capturing yours passionately as his hips stalled, grinding himself against your g-spot, pubic bone rubbing your clit as you found your orgasm, pussy gushing wet dripping down his thighs onto the bed as you moaned into his mouth. 

“You’ll be such a good mother baby, such a good fucking mother.” His hips picked back up in pace, “I’d do anything for you baby. Anything.” He was chasing his release now, thrusting against your sensitive clit making you reel again before releasing your hands and grabbing your thighs, pushing them back high against the bed, just making you take it. You both had to try to be quiet here, your sister on the floor above you, your hand covered your mouth as you tried to muffle the loud obnoxious squealing that came uncontrollably as his hips slapped against your ass in this position. Sweat forming on his brow and head thrown back as he groans through his teeth, feeling him empty his seed deep against your cervix. 

In all the years you’d known him Ransom was never a kid person. He didn’t like small children, but he also didn’t come into contact with them often which is why it was so strange two months ago when he originally brought up the idea. “I think we would make pretty okay parents,” He said, “Better than mine definitely.” It made your heart flutter, thinking of a life with him. Knowing that he was also thinking about a life with you, but it’s just not the right time. 

What wasn’t surprising about any of this was on Christmas morning, after breakfast and the exchanging of handmade sweaters, new books to read, a couple new apple watches, and your sister and you receiving matching earrings, a gorgeous little blue nose pit bull puppy, one that reminded you of your childhood dog was brought out with a little pink bow around its neck. Ransom ignored your glare as he handed the sweet little thing to your sister, who was crying in happiness. 

He would remind you later on that he found you cooing to the sweet little thing only a few minutes after that, the puppy curled up in your arms, licking your fingers in earnest. 

“Don’t you have something else?” Julia asked him. 

“Julia this is plenty,” You scolded, “He’s gotten you enough.” She rolled her eyes. 

“It’s not for me.” She laughed. The little puppy sleeping in her arms and you scratched it behind it’s ears, turning to Ransom who shifted nervously to one knee, a ring box open in his hand. 

“Stop it.” Came out from a very watery smile. He licked his lips, tugging his bottom one between his teeth before starting, 

“You’re the only woman I’ve ever loved.” 

.

.

.

TAGLIST //

@littlechillies @hellizhelusive2 @notbexmader @marvelouspottering @whitequeenasitbgan @Thegraylaway @readermia​ @i-believe-in-unicorns-and-you @princess-evans-addict @perplexed3001 @deidrashouseofpain @hailmary-yramliah​ @sleepycvpid​ @joannaliceevans-fanficblog​ @starlywars​ @gifsbysimplysonia​ @rocknbasil​ @imnotelasticheart​ @wannabegonnie @d1sconnect3d​ @heyguyz13 @unimomajo @this-is-serenaa​  @bookish-shristi​ @auroussss​

[ikingsley]

Ina x MC: Late Nights

Ina x MC: Late Nights

Summary: Ina misses a date she planned.

Warnings: Angst! Also warning for brief mentions of alcohol.

Tag: @samanthadalton @domakir @kulaykape @hellyeah90sbaby @dopeyouth @kwaj05 @thedaft1​ @swimmingshoebakerydreamer​

Author’s Notes: I wanted to provide a little more background on Luna, who’s a neuroscience major. I also was craving angst, so this is the product of that.

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Friday @12:47 pm

Ina: I’ll see you at home tonight; remember, I’m cooking.

Luna: Oh lord 🙏

Ina: Hey! I promise it’ll be fine. All you need to do is show up. See you then, mi amor ❤️.

But now, it was almost 3 in the morning. The apartment was dark and quiet, except for the TV that was on at low volume. Luna was sprawled on the couch; she had knocked out a long time ago. What was supposed to be a fun date night with Ina had turned into a night of anguish for Luna. 

Ina was supposed to come home early to cook — albeit a very basic meal, but nevertheless, a meal — for Luna. The two were supposed to play some Trivial Pursuit and then cuddle to a movie together. Little did they know that that was quite the opposite of what would really happen that night.

When Luna had arrived at Ina’s apartment to find Ina not there, she hadn’t been worried. She’d been held up in the office quite often before. A student asking for an extension, an administrator here and there...but as the minutes slid into hours, Luna began losing hope. And with that dissipating, Luna became more and more angry. She texted Ina multiple times, just to receive radio silence. She had to rearrange her volunteer schedule at the hospital for this, and Ina hadn’t even bothered to show up at her own place. For such a driven and brilliant woman, Ina could be so irritating.

Ina got out of the cab, lurching forward towards her apartment. She mumbled incoherently to herself as she fumbled with her keys. When she finally was able to let herself into her home, she stumbled over her own heels and fell down, subsequently causing a loud crash sound. Oh crap, she muttered.

Luna jumped up, already on high alert. She looked around, only to find Ina on the floor. Luna gave Ina a sad, disappointed look, but turned away as a tear fell from her eye. This seemed to slightly sober Ina up.

“Wait- Luna!” Ina said desperately, clawing at the floor, trying to get up. The cry in her voice caused Luna to turn around for a split second. “Can we please talk?”

“Ina, you’re too out of it to have a mature conversation. Christ, you reek,” Luna sighed, shaking her head and retreating to the bedroom.

It hadn’t been the first time Ina had come home intoxicated, but those times, Ina was funny, and Luna had taken care of her accordingly. More importantly, on those occasions, Ina hadn’t planned out a date night.

Ina poured herself a shot of coffee and downed it in an attempt to sober up. When she felt like she had gained some sort of consciousness, she walked towards the bedroom. Right before she had reached the doorway, she held herself back, drawing in a deep breath. The conversation that she wanted to take place was going to be heavy, and she knew it.

Luna was curled up on her own side of the bed, scrolling absentmindedly on her phone. Tears rolled down her face, onto the pillow, but she had no control over her them. 

“Luna,” Ina breathed out. It was low, but very well enunciated.  

“You’re welcome to sleep on the couch in the living room,” Luna said sarcastically.

“I know you’re mad. Today was supposed to be about us, and I blew it.”

Though Ina couldn’t see Luna, she felt her eye roll. “You really did.”

Ina walked over to Luna’s side of the bed and crouched down to meet Luna’s eyes. She was met with Luna shifting on the bed, rolling over so that Ina couldn’t see her crying.

“Oh, real mature,” Ina scoffed.

“Bye bye!” Luna said in a sing-songy voice.

“Who the hell are you talking to?” Ina snapped.

“MATURITY. She left when you came home, wasted and reeking on our date night. God, just go to sleep, Ina. It’s three in the morning. The couch is practically screeching your name,” Luna said as her voice finally broke. The sarcastic facade could only last a few moments. She pointed to the door, trying to get Ina to leave her alone.

Ina stood in the middle of the bedroom, just watching Luna cry. It hurt. She hurt Luna. What have I done, Ina reckoned, wiping at her own tears.

Finally, Ina trudged out of the room. She plopped herself on the couch; the only times she’d actually slept there were when Luna fell asleep in her arms, and she didn’t want to wake her.

When Ina left the room, Luna let out a sob, followed by a stream of tears. For the past few days, Ina had acted distant. Luna thought it would be a quick phase; Ina had publishing deadlines throughout the year. When a big deadline approached, Ina would immerse herself in her work, and Luna understood. Sure, she was clingy, but she knew how much work meant to Ina. And when Ina met the deadline, Luna was the first to congratulate her, and they’d celebrate together. But never had anything like this happen before. Never had Ina come home smelling this foul. Never had Ina missed a date she planned and seemed excited about. Most of all, never had she let Luna down like this before.

The two hugged themselves on their respective sleeping arrangements. Tears flowed freely and the women tossed and turned. By now, hours had gone by, and neither had slept a wink.

~

The sun had come up and light broke into the window. Luna huddled under the covers, acting as if the sun’s light was the reason she couldn’t sleep. At this point, she had stopped crying - she felt that her tear ducts couldn’t physically produce anything anymore.

“Luna, I love you,” Ina’s voice rang out. 

Had that been real? The sleep-deprived young woman didn’t know if Ina had actually spoken to her or if that was a figment of her imagination, recalling happier times of Ina’s many love confessions.

“Luna,” The voice said again. “God! Just look at me! Please.”

Now, Luna knew she wasn’t hallucinating anymore. She pulled off the covers, facing Ina for the first time in hours. And with a quick glance, Luna discovered that Ina didn’t look much better than herself. It was evident that she also hadn’t slept, and dried tears stained her face.

Luna’s lower lip quivered, and she knew, somehow, she was about to cry again. And once again, she pulled the covers over her face.

“What can I do, Luna? You used to tell me I was the most beautiful person you’d ever seen, and now you can’t even look at me.”

“Leave me alone,” Luna grumbled.

For a moment, there was silence, but then, Ina attacked. She yanked off the covers and pinned Luna down with her body. 

“I love-” Ina cried out, but she was interrupted by the pain flashing through Luna’s eyes. It had only been a mere second, because Luna shut her eyes so promptly to ease her pain, but it had taken its toll. 

God, what am I doing, Ina thought to herself, rolling onto the other side of the bed. For a while, the two just sat staring numbly at the ceiling. It was as if they were reflecting - physically together, but mentally, miles away.

It was Luna who clasped the other woman’s hand. Ina wasn’t expecting it, but she returned the grip.

“I’m really sorry, Luna,” Ina admitted. “I’m such an ass.”

“I know you’re stressed, it’s fine-”

“It really isn’t, Luna. I made a commitment, and I failed to follow through.”

“I’m more disappointed than mad or anything else, really.”

And if this was supposed to be any sort of consolation to Ina, it really wasn’t. Somehow, her heart dropped even further into her chest. Having disappointed Luna was worse than upsetting her.

The two sat in silence for a long time, contemplating. They could hear each other’s sniffles every so often, followed by them clearing their throats. Their hearts still beat together as one, even after feeling so apart.

“Ina?” Luna questioned, releasing her hand from Ina’s hand. She moved to face her as Ina did the same.

Before, Ina had only seen glimpses of her lover, but now, it was all real. Luna’s face was now wet with tears, but she still had a small, sad smile on her face. That smile. It was the one that broke her heart into a million pieces, something that only Luna knew how to put back together. 

Ina shut her eyes, trying to not let herself cry for the umpteenth time in a span of 12 hours. 

“Hey. What’s wrong?” Luna asked sympathetically. Ina just shook her head, looking back at the ceiling through her tear-glazed eyes. She reached out to Ina to cup her face. “Ina, look at me. What’s wrong?”

“Look at you. I was the one who screwed up, and now you’re comforting me,” Ina said, letting out a quick breath. This girl was truly something else.

“Missing a date night...that’s not like you. At all. So something’s up, and you’re not telling me,” Luna said intuitively. 

“I-” Ina began, but her voice wavered, and a sob followed. 

“Come here,” Luna said, opening up her arms.

Ina inched towards Luna, and Luna wrapped her arms around Ina. They stayed like this for a while, until Luna brought her hand around to wipe away Ina’s tears. 

“Ever since you started volunteering at the hospital, I feel like we’ve...grown apart,” Ina said.

“I- I’m not sure what to say to that, Ina. I have to focus on my own future, just like you had to in college,” Luna said back softly.

“I know, I know. I’m not asking you to drop it or anything like that. I know you’ll need some kind of experience for med school. I’m just...worried about us,” Ina admitted.

“Is that why you were drinking tonight?” Luna asked.

“Well, my paper was one reason, but then I began thinking about us. How much you’ve grown since we met. And now, you’re about to take the MCAT. You’re already so busy now; imagine when you get into med school and become a famous neuroscientist.”

“We’ve both always been busy, but we’ve managed it. You’re so important to me, Ina. And don’t you forget it. Because I won’t. My future is important, but mainly because you’re gonna be a huge part of it.”

Ina smiled slowly, meeting Luna’s eyes. “How do you always know what to say?”

“Because we’ve been through hell and back, Ina.” That glimmer in Luna’s eyes was back, giving Ina the confidence she needed.

“You know, you’re right. As a great poet once said, ‘Love will find a way through paths where wolves fear to prey,’” Ina chuckled.

“Oh god, you’re quoting Lord Byron now?” Luna broke out into a laughing fit.

“He defined poetry from the Romantic period! Maybe he didn’t find his own...person, but he was a great poet.”

“Well, you’re my person, and I’m yours. You’re not losing me, and you never will. We’re practically stuck together for eternity,” Luna jested. 

“There’s no one I’d rather be stuck with,” Ina grinned.

[sacklerscumrag]

Part II of III: Stay With Me Series

Clyde Logan X Female Reader

Notes: Sorry it took me so long to update ya'll, my life has been a mess lately haha I went pretty soft with this chapter but this is what my mushy brain came up after so many things went wrong with it (it’s been a ride LOL) Part 3 coming next week :)

Summary: Time for our favorite southern boy to take us out on a couple dates. Let's see if he makes a move ;)

Warnings: Vaginal fingering, fluff

Word Count: 2.6K

Part I

ao3 link

       Picking up the book Clyde returned, you noticed a slip of paper fall on the counter. ‘Just in case Darlin’ was written down along with his phone number. Mustering up some courage you sent him a quick text before getting up to help your first customer of the day. After a couple hours, it was finally time to go home and get ready for your date.

           Around 7:00 pm that night, Clyde knocked on your door. You rushed out of your room to answer it, eager to see your mountain man on the other side of it.

           “Hey darlin” he smiled, blushing at the sight of you.

           “Hey Clyde. Ready?” you bit your bottom lip as you said it. He nodded before walking you towards the car.

The theater was a short drive away. When you arrived, it looked like all of Boone County showed up for the creature feature tonight. Clyde parked the car in a spot farther back, away from the screen, and pulled out a bag with all kinds of snacks.

           The movie started as you and Clyde sat closer to each other.

           “Hey darlin, didn’t they skip the part in Chapter 12 just now?” you were taken back, remembering that part in the book.

           “How did you know?” you turned to look at him.

           “I saw that note ya had all marked up in yer book” smirking at you and letting out a sigh before looking forward again. He really remembered that? You thought to yourself as you snuggled against his arm, resting your head on his shoulder, continuing to watch the movie in a comfortable silence.

           Once the movie ended, you gathered the snacks and settled back into your seat. Spending the whole drive home discussing the movie with Clyde you went over your favorite parts, his Frankenstein impression making you giggle uncontrollably. Once you arrived home, he made his way out of the car and around to open your door, walking you to your front porch.

           You turned to face him under your dimly lit porch light. Clyde was hunching over, nervously biting at his bottom lip while looking down.

           “I had a great time tonight Clyde” he shyly looks up at you, taking a small step forward, drawing you in. From this close you couldn’t help but notice the way his brows seemed to be permanently furrowed, his lips so plump, begging to be kissed, his freckles looked like constellations spreading across his face. You wanted to cling onto him, kiss him dizzy, and never let go.

Before he could say anything, you closed the distance between, pressing your lips on his. His hand coming up to cup your face, thumb slowly caressed your cheek. Kissing you gently like you were going to break in his grasp. His hands moved to your waist while yours rested on his chest, melting into the kiss. Clyde’s tongue prodded at your lips for entrance which you happily granted. The way his mouth moved against yours made you feel like you’d done this a thousand times before. Relishing in the way his nose moved against your cheek as your lips explored each other. He tasted like the candy you had been sharing earlier and you wanted more.

Both of you pulled away to catch your breath, your foreheads still touching. Clyde’s fingers trace down your arms all the way to your hands, taking them into his own.

“Goodnight y/n” his thumb caresses the back of your hand, making bite your lip as he kissed your forehead and headed to his truck.

------------------------------------------🌝🌞------------------------------------------

           Clyde swung by the store early Thursday morning. You had been trying to make plans to see each other sooner but between the bar and the busy holiday season at the bookstore you both barely had time for anything else. So, you finally agreed to have a morning coffee date before customers started coming into the store. Clyde strolled in at around 8:00 am, wearing his gray, button down shirt and those skinny jeans you were dying to rip off of him.

           “Good Morning Darlin” he set down the coffees on the counter as you made your way around. Wrapping your arms around his neck bringing him in for a delicious kiss, his lips being the only breakfast you were interested in having this morning. His hands gripped your hips, pressing you closer to his body. The cold sensation of his prosthetic hand on our hip making you lightly moan into his mouth.

           Clyde’s tongue moved in sync with yours, both hungrily devouring each other, this kiss being much hungrier than the last. Your fingers tangled in his hair, pulling at it, making Clyde deepen the kiss. He cupped your ass, sliding his hands down under your thighs, to hoist you up onto the counter. Standing between your legs, he caressed your thighs and ass, you could feel just how much Clyde was straining in his jeans. You slid your hand down to feel it for yourself, palming him lightly through his jeans, before hearing a car door slam outside.

           Clyde quickly backed away from you as you jumped off the counter and straightened yourselves out. Trying to make it seem like you weren’t just making out like two horny teenagers at 8:00 am. He stood behind you, trying to cover up the obvious tenting in his jeans as two customers walked into the bookstore.

           “Good morning, welcome to Sams” they nodded towards you “If you need anything, please let me know” they made their way through the bookshelves, not paying any mind to the two of you. Turning around you start to giggle when you see Clyde holding a book in front of him in a very strategic way, hair disheveled, face flush, and lips swollen from your kisses walking towards you.

           “I’ll text you. I gotta get a couple errands done before work” leaning in you give Clyde one more quick kiss before he heads out.

           The rest of the day passed with a few customers trickling in and out until closing time. The book you had been reading keeping you glued to it whenever you had the chance. Clyde’s name popping up on your phone temporarily distracting you.

Clyde: Hey Darlin, sorry to run out on ya like that

Its alright Clyde, I had a couple things to get done anyway 😊

Clyde: I meant to ask before I left but would you wanna go out again this Friday?

Of course, I would! Where to?

Clyde: Now that’s a surprise, beautiful. I’ll pick you up at 7. See ya Friday

           Your stomach fluttered at the thought of Clyde’s surprise. This man was going to be the end of you, you knew it.

------------------------------------------🌝🌞------------------------------------------

The sun was setting on Friday afternoon, your nerves were already settling in as you got home from work. You decided on wearing your low-cut white, long sleeve shirt and favorite pair of black pants with your black boots, throwing on a corduroy coat. It was going to be a chilly night, you wanted to be prepared for whatever Clyde had in store.

           You heard Clyde’s truck pull up outside as you ran out to grab your purse and open the door. Clyde is standing there looking as handsome as ever in his long sleeve plaid shirt and jeans with roses in one hand.

           “Ya look beautiful Darlin” You blushed furiously at his words as he handed you the roses. You rushed to the kitchen to grab a vase and set the flowers while Clyde steps into the living room.

           “Thank you, Clyde, they’re beautiful” moving to stand in front of him on your tippy toes to give place a kiss on his cheek, making him break into a smile.

           “Yer welcome, you ready to go?” you nod and make your way out of the house.

           You slid into the truck next to Clyde, adjusting your seat belt. “So where exactly are we going?” Clyde was careful not to give you too many details about your date and you were itching to find out. He just chuckled and pulled out of the driveway as you scooted closer to him.

           When you finally arrived at your destination, you look out to see Clyde had brought you to the Boone County Annual Fall Festival. There were twinkling lights and pumpkin as far as the eye could see, seemed like everyone in town was there. Clyde turned to you, watching your face as you took it all in.

           “Ya ready for yer first fall festival?” you turn to him, giving him a big smile and a quick peck on the lips before getting out of the car.

           The cold breeze settled in as you walked in through the pumpkin patch, the smell of cider in the air surrounded you as Clyde took your small hand, interlocking your fingers with his. There were food trucks set up on one side of the farm while the other had the county wide famous haunted house. You looked around, loving the ambiance of fall surrounding you while he couldn’t take his eyes off of you.

Both of you spent the late afternoon drinking hot cider, snacking all types of cookies  and roaming the pumpkin patch hand in hand with Clyde while he pulled you close any time you walked away from the crowds, kissing you until you both had no other choice but to come up for air. You talked about everything from books to your lives growing up, even about his accident. Clyde kept up his Frankenstein impressions, you had to give it to him, he did know how to make you laugh.

As the sun went down, Clyde offered to show you around the back of the farm. You had your arm looped around his, walking towards the back when Clyde got a phone call.

“Gimme a sec Darlin” he kissed the back of your hand and walked away to take the call. A few moments later he came back “come with me” he said as he took you behind a large oak tree where there was a four-wheeler parked with a blindfold laid on top of the seat. “I got a surprise for ya. But first ya gotta put this on fer me” you nodded as he placed the blindfold over your eyes and took your hand, guiding you to sit comfortably behind him.

           You felt Clyde sit as you wrapped your arms around his wide torso. Taking the time to feel him in your arms as you took off. A few minutes later you felt the bike stop.

           “We’re here” Clyde got off, taking your hands to guide you off safely. He stood behind you and placed his hands on your hips, guiding you to walk forward. “Okay” he unwrapped the blindfold and as it fell from your eyes, you couldn’t believe what you saw.

           You were standing at the top of the hill that had the best view of the whole festival. Hay bales were laid out on one side in a C shape with various colored pillows and blankets thrown over the ground facing the beautiful hillside view. On the other side there was a table with hot chocolate and lanterns surrounding the entire area. You felt Clyde wrap his arms around you, nuzzling into the crook of your neck. Eyes filling with tears as you placed your hand over your mouth in disbelief.

           “Oh, my goodness Clyde” you were speechless. The thought that he would go through all this trouble for you made your heart burst. Clyde placed a quick kiss on your head as he walked towards the blankets.

           “This is ma favorite place to come when I gotta clear ma mind” you sat down placing some of the blankets over the both of you as you nestled into Clyde’s side with his arm over your shoulder. “It’s got the best view fer lookin at the stars” you looked up to see the night sky lit up as you’ve never seen it before.

           “It’s beautiful Clyde, all of this is. Thank you” sitting up to see him looking back at you.

You scooted closer to him and placed a kiss on his lips. Clyde brought his hand up to the side of your neck, opening his mouth to let his tongue mend with yours. You knew Clyde was too much of a gentleman to take this further, so you decided to take matters into your own hands. You slowly got up and swung your leg over to straddle Clyde, never breaking the kiss. His hands immediately moved to your thighs then to your ass, gripping it hard. You were sure there would be bruises there tomorrow. Your fingers tangled in his hair, giving it a tug, making Clyde choke back a moan. His hands grounded your hips down on his, making his cock rub just right over your aching clit through your pants. Clyde pulled his lips away for a moment.

           “Darlin I-“ you could see the hesitant look in his eyes.

           “Clyde it’s okay” you whispered as you took his hand and placed it on your chest, guiding him to knead your breast. Clyde took your lips in his own again, hungrier this time. He hooked his mechanical arm around your waist, pressing your body against his. His other hand making its way down to undo the buttons on your pants and sliding his hand under your panties. A moan escaped you when you felt his fingers run along your slit.

       “Fuck. Yer so wet. Is that all for me?” you grip his shoulders, whimpering as he slipped two thick fingers inside, stretching you. Clyde moved to kiss and bite at your neck, leaving purple marks wherever he could. He started to pump his fingers in and out of you at a steady pace, feeling your wetness seep onto his hand. He added a third finger and curled them inside you making you gasp. Touching that sweet spot, threatening to send you over the edge as you writhed on top of him. He brought his thumb to your clit and started to draw circles, making you buck your hips into his hand as your breathing got heavier, you were getting close. Clyde’s eyes watched you, your was head thrown back as you arched your back, your face coiling with pleasure as you made some of the most beautiful sounds he’s ever heard.

           “Yer close aren’t ya baby. Go ahead cum for me. I wanna feel ya cum on my fingers” the last words Clyde said turned into a blur as your orgasm hit you. You squirmed in his lap as he held you close, his fingers fucking you through your orgasm. Your body fell limp onto Clyde’s as you both panted and he placed kisses on the side of your head. Pulling his fingers from you, he took them in his mouth, licking them clean.

           “Ya taste so sweet darlin. So good” as soon as you regained control of your body, you leaned back and start to undo Clyde’s belt to return the favor before Clyde takes your wrists in his hand to stop you.

“Please Clyde, let me do this for you” he shook his head.

“As much as I would love to darlin. I would hate for our first time to be on a bale of hay where anyone can see us. I’m fine, really I am. That was amazing. You’re amazing” he cupped your face with both hands, bringing you in for another kiss “Lets get goin, fairs closin soon”

      “Five more minutes. I want to enjoy this” you said as you turned in Clydes lap, laying down in between his legs as he wrapped a blanket around you, holding you close to him. You never wanted this moment to end.

[wintrgarden]

a latte for your thoughts?

// a fan fiction dedicated to the winter garden couple of hospital playlist //

-----

"Ikjun, do you have my warm cup of hot latte?" Jeong won said, while walking towards him in the hospital's open space to take a break during his night shift.

"Here. Isn't it tiring in the PICU these days?" Ikjun replied with worried eyes.

"A little. I don't mind it though.

Yah, do you remember my liver transplant patient, Mina?"

"Yeah, the one where we had to cut the donor's liver to a quarter because it won't fit the tiny baby's body. What about her?"

"I went to her a while ago. She woke up, and winked at me like this!" Jeongwon lit up whenever he talks about his patients' recovery. His eyes sparkled and his smile widened. He repeated the wink so much that it could have been mistaken for a blink. In fact, he was so giddy that he didn't notice someone approaching.

"Professor Ikjun? The test results of patient Jiwon are out. Could you take a look at it?"

Jang Gyeoul, the third year resident of General Surgery has been standing there for a few moments, waiting for the two professors to actually notice.

While hiding his laugh, Ikjun followed suit. Jeongwon was left on the bench with an unwavering smile on his face.

Looking at him, one would think that his drink was too sweet to make him smile like that. Eavesdropping on their conversation would transform him into a humanitarian. But to delve into his thoughts --- now that, that's a different story.

It's nice to actually see an angel, once in a while. Just enough to keep me on my feet. I might be even enthralled by its eyes that don't wink but are enveloped with fascinating halo-like things. Even if this angel doesn't have wings, it has the most power to chase evil away. I wasn't sure if this angel could save me --- until it actually did.

------

"Yah, Ahn Jeongwon, are you sleeping here again?" Junwan said, while entering their shared office.

"O~ I just finished my night shift. I just lied down."

"Have you eaten?"

"I'll eat later."

"I also haven't eaten yet. Let's eat breakfast."

"Will you stop bugging me if I eat?" Junwan then pulled Jeongwon out of the cot, and dragged him to the packed cafeteria to fall in line.

------

"One iced latte, please. Oh, and a sandwich."

With the same baggy eyes and pale skin, Gyeoul was ordering her morning coffee. Just enough to keep her awake until she gets home.

"Annyeonghaseyo~" She greeted the two professors.

"De~" Jeongwon said, while Junwan nodded in response.

CODE BLUE --- CS. 3RD FLOOR. CODE BLUE --- CS. 3RD FLOOR.

Without a beat, Junwan, a Cardiothoracic Surgery Professor, left hurriedly. Jeongwon was then left alone. Gyeoul took her order and searched for a seat.

"One warm cup of hot latte and a pancake, please."

After getting his order, Jeongwon followed through and tried to find his way in the crowd. It was full of doctors and nurses waiting to start their morning shifts, so the noise was understandable.

"Professor! Here!" Gyeoul pointed to a newly vacant seat in front of her. The morning rush got the best of them that Jeongwon didn't think twice and made his way.

The crowd was boisterous. Jeongwon and Gyeoul's silence was awkward. It was not the kind of environment you'd want after a 12-hour shift.

But it was all worth it. At least for one of them.

"How was the Emergency Room last night?" Jeongwon blurted after taking a bite of his pancake.

"It's okay. There were a lot of unpredictable cases, most of which were tiring, as usual." Gyeoul's detailed answer was so calm. It seemed that the Professor's unexpected friendliness didn't bother her.

"Do you have someone to take you home?"

"What? No. I can go by myself." With a polite tone, Gyeoul showed her surprise with the question.

"I'll give you a ride home."

"No, you don't need to---"

"I insist. I still haven't bought you the meal you asked from me, anyway. Can a ride home suffice?"

Gyeoul was bewildered. But with the professor's kind nature, it seemed like something he would do for literally anyone. He wasn't called the "Buddha" for nothing, anyway.

-----

"It's that apartment on the right, Professor."

"This one?"

"Yes. Thank you for the ride."

"It's not a problem. The next time we catch ourselves on a rough patch, I can take you home again."

Gyeoul smiled. Her first that day. Then, she opened the door to get out.

"Oh, shit! I forgot!" The car stopped. Jeongwon's shock even surprised Gyeoul.

"Why, Professor? What happened?"

"I totally forgot about it. I was scheduled to get my car battery change the other week, then I forgot and was planning to do it today."

Sleeping in the cot that morning wasn't just to save time to rest up. He actually had long, overdue chores and was saving some energy to do them.

"Do you have a contact to a car battery seller?" Gyeoul asked.

"Yeah, I'll contact them now."

It was still early in the morning, around 6 o'clock. The service opened at 9 o'clock, so delivery wasn't possible after an hour or so.

Gyeoul stayed with him until things got settled. It was getting chilly, and the overwhelming fatigue got the best out of Jeongwon.

"Professor, you could rest a little in my place... if you like. You can sleep while waiting."

Jeongwon hesitated a bit, but decided to give in.

------

"I'll just get an extra pillow and some blankets." said Gyeoul, while Jeongwon helped in fixing the convertible sofa bed in her living room.

Once fixed, he sat and removed his shoes.

"You live alone?" he asked Gyeoul once she got back.

"Yes, for a while now." she replied as she handed him the pillow.

"Ah, I see."

"I'll just be in my room. You can call me if you need anything."

"Thank you... Also, I'm sorry for being so troublesome." His shy look gave him away.

"It's nothing, don't worry." Gyeoul smiled, and went into her room.

Jeongwon lied down. He couldn't believe what was happening --- and how the situation could naturally give a wrong impression. If he told Ikjun about this, he would make fun of him and joke about how he got things to escalate so quickly. Junwan would tap him on the back and commend him for finally picking up some tricks of his. Songhwa would be very much amused, and would romanticize the whole situation. Meanwhile, Seokhyeong would remind him that he's an OB-GYN Professor, and that he delivers babies very well. He would be of service to Jeongwon if ever he needed one.

His thoughts started to tone down, and after no time, he was asleep.

-------

"Professor?"

......

"Professor? I fixed some lunch. Do you want to eat?" Gyeoul wore an apron over some loose shirt and pajamas now, and sun was already high up.

Jeongwon looked at his wrist watch.

2:24 PM.

He quickly sat up.

"I'm sorry, did the service arrive? I must have been in a deep sleep."

"Yes, they arrived a few hours ago. I tried to wake you, but you were soundly asleep."

"I'm really sorry. You had to pay them, didn't you? I'll just pay you back."

"The receipts are there, over the table."

Jeongwon went to get them, and was distracted with the smell of food coming from the kitchen.

"Professor, I fixed some lunch for us, if you want to eat..."

He felt ashamed to take another offer, but hearing his stomach grumble made him look the other way, again.

Gyeoul was already fixing the table for two, while Jeongwon sat quietly and contemplated how much trouble he caused her all in a single day.

"I'm really sorry... I meant to wake up, seriously. I was just really tired from last night."

"It's okay." Gyeoul said with a chuckle. "I'm not holding anything against you, Professor." she added as she handed out his chopsticks.

"Thank you for the meal." he then said.

Everything was new to Ahn Jeongwon. He didn't need to wipe the table, or arrange the food, or even wear an apron. He didn't even need to worry if he was going to get enough food, as everything was already at his disposal. This new scenario keeps him gushing.

Being alone with a girl, in her apartment, eating her cooked food, and feeling something that only grown-ups alone in an enclosed space would feel. It wasn't like this was the first time something like this is happening, he often said to himself. It somehow eased his discomfort.

All while knowing the truth that this is in fact the first time.

But it's not like Jeongwon didn't have the opportunity and ability to; he just chose not to. His faith led him to a different path, and he was decisive to go this way. For the longest time, this weighed more than any choice he had to make in his life. But this time, something, or perhaps someone, was gonna tip the scale.

-----

"Yah! Jang Gyeoul! What's this?" Chu Minha screamed as Gyeoul entered the GS Department, in time for another night shift.

Someone left iced latte for her. With a double bacon sandwich. And some patches to ease pain. It came with a written note, saying:

"To my Good Samaritan. Thank you~

---- Ahn Jeongwon"

The handwriting made Gyeoul smile.

"Why did Pediatric Surgeon Prof. Ahn Jeongwon gave you coffee? And why are you smiling?"

"Nothing. It's just to repay a good deed."

"That's the most vague yet unsuspicious answer I've ever heard! Good deeds really cannot be questioned at all. I wish someone would also give me coffee." Minha wouldn't stop, but Gyeoul wasn't listening either.

She focused on the note. And the coffee. And the sandwich.

While remembering the long day with Ahn Jeongwon.

[mi6-cafe]

THE LDWS ENTRIES FOR WEEK 1 ARE IN!

Now it’s your turn to READ&VOTE!

Let’s refresh your memory first.

This week the word count was 100 words and this was the prompt:

[drabbles below the line]

HOW DO YOU VOTE?

Read all the drabbles.

Choose three that you like the most.

Fill out this VOTING FORM, telling us your favourites. (You can even leave anonymous feedback for the author).

NOTE: If you are a competitor, you CANNOT vote for your own fic. But please, do vote. :)

The voting period ends at 11:59 PM EST on Sunday night. Results will be posted and anonymous feedback will be emailed on Monday.

#1

Title: 100 Seconds Author: sorion          Warnings: implied canon-typical violence         Summary: Seconds counting down to words that count.

"One hundred seconds, 007," Q says.

Bond knows. His reliable inner countdown always lets him know how close death is. Eighty seconds until he has to be off the empty German plane.

Sixty-eight seconds to not only outwit his personal death, but the death of everyone the crashing plane will kill in London.

Forty-seven to break the auto pilot, divert destiny from its path and the plane into the channel.

Thirty to grab a parachute, listen to the increasingly panicky voice in his ear.

"James! Fifteen seconds!"

Thirteen seconds for a jump and three words.

"I'm coming home."

Two.

One.

#2

Title: Delayed Author: Ksania/Starrboned Warnings: None Summary: It wasn't flying that scared Q the most.

The stuttering departure board snaps into place, merciless and cold.

Delayed.

Impatient, Q taps his fingers against his thigh.

It wasn't flying that scared Q. He knew better than most how safe planes were, the intricate mechanisms that kept them afloat.

They didn't always land; Q waits for the inevitable to happen.

His eyes blink with the board: one, two, ten thousand - the seconds melt into months. Q stands still while the airport is buzzing around him.

"Q?" James's voice cuts like lightning through fog. "Have you been waiting for long?"

Q shakes his head, smiling thinly.

"Not at all."

#3

Title: Flight Plan Author: Anyawen Warnings: None Summary: A chance sighting requires changes on the fly.

Be a dear and change my flight, won't you?

You'll survive 3 hours in economy class.

FIN2424 to Valencia. Leaves in 35 min.

I'm not a bloody travel agent. Book your own holiday.

I had been hoping to get back to London. Spend some time spoiling your cats. And you. Unfortunately ... <image0805202013.jpg>

…  That's Nīkau Tama.

Indeed. They're announcing last call for boarding.

Keep your pants on.

Where's the fun in that?

Ticket confirmation is in your email.

Thank you, darling.

Just catch the bastard and come home, then you can thank me properly.

I prefer 'improperly'.

...

So do I.

#4

Title: Seatmates Author: IrishWitch58 Warnings: None Summary: Departure lounges are lonely, until they're not.

Airport departure boards were depressing if you rarely had the chance to decide your destination yourself. Bond watched the crowds as he waited for his flight to be posted. He was supposed to be accompanied by a Q branch expert but they were late. He'd kissed Q goodbye early this morning, holding him close in the grey dawn light. Saying goodbye was getting harder lately. Someone moved up next to him and he blinked. “Q? But you hate flying.”

“Overstated,” Q responded succinctly. “Valencia is warmer than London and I hate cold worse. There are perks. We're going first class.”

#5

Title: Boarding Author: SouffleGirl91 Warnings: None Summary: He waits to board the plane.

“Flight BA25007 to Kingston is now boarding.”

Heaving a sigh, he stood, clutching his ticket. Was he really doing this? Boarding a plane to Jamaica on the trail of a washed-up double-oh, just to tell him- no. No thinking about that right now. That could wait. It was a long flight. Plenty of time to decide how to tell him.

Shuffling into line, he fingered his passport. He missed having the power to skip the rigmarole and just board. But this wasn’t a sanctioned mission.

The new Quartermaster had better things to do.

This was personal. Bond had to know.

#6

Title:  Homeward Bound Author: Iambid/Flantastic Warnings: None Summary: It’s late, Q’s tired and James’s flight is due.

Heathrow is deserted.

Q is alone in the waiting area except for a lone family, waiting for a loved one.  He’s waiting for James.  He’s not sure if James ever thought of him as a loved one, not since Madeleine…

The arrivals board clatters, the quaintly old-fashioned sound waking him from his doze. He’s so tired, should have been in bed hours ago, but James asked him to be there and even after everything, he can’t say no to him.

He thinks to himself that maybe James is the loved one as he stands stiffly and waits for his agent.

#7

Title: Vision Author: sunaddicted Warnings: none Summary: some dreams are bound to never become real

"I had a dream" Raoul stretched amidst the rumpled sheets, reaching out to land a hand on James' belly "A nice one?" "I was at an airport" "Why?" "Leaving" "For?" "I'm not sure, the flight details kept blurring and changing on the board" James looked down at Raoul, as if the key to his dream lay amidst those distorted features "I was leaving London. Permanently. It felt better than I always thought it would" shame burned on his tongue. Raoul hummed, thumb tracing the pucker of a scar "It was just a dream" and like one, they had no future.

#8

Title: Fight and Flight Author: stormofsharpthings Warnings: no Archive warnings apply Summary: All the comforts of the first-class lounge

It hadn’t been his finest moment, Bond admitted as he prowled through BritishAir’s first-class lounge. He’d had a monumentally stupid fight with Q and stormed out, demanding to take the next mission available.

The departure board flickered. His flight was delayed again and Bond groaned — more hours of inaction to brood over his poor behaviour.

He paced until the board flickered again, showing a further delay, and he slumped, defeated.

After a while, he rubbed his face and looked up glumly.

COME HOME, it flickered.

Bond sighed, a rueful smile emerging, wondering if make up sex was an option.

#9

Title: Time and Place Author: Venstar Warnings: none Summary: Travel

It was a simple process. Approach the board and wait.

“Time Agent 007.”

The only acknowledgment of his name spoken softly through his earpiece was the slight turn of his head.

“Your countdown. 5,4,3,2,1…” The voice trailed off as the board flickered before 007’s eyes divulging his next destination. “You will have seventy-two hours to complete your mission. Good luck in 2424.”

“And when I’m done? How about dinner, Q?”

If a snort could sound posh, leave it to Q to figure that trick out.

Q countered his offer. “How about you return my equipment in one piece?”

“With pleasure.”

#10

Title: The Destination Board Author: ladymars Warnings: No Warnings Apply (Canon Character Death?) Summary: M remains vigilant, even after everything.

She finds the oddest device when she first arrives. A departure board flickering with the destinations of the colleagues she had left behind. M does remember that 008 was to be deployed to Havana and that R had a conference at Frankfurt. Her new friends here tell her there's much more to explore and enjoy, now that she has time to repose, but she decides to linger. No rest for the wicked, of course. She catches an expected arrival at Altaussee, Austria followed by an unexpected one. Huh. She should have suspected he would have boarded a plane for him.

#11

Title: Trinity Author: sparklycitrus Warnings: None Summary: An unholy alliance.

When the airport bulletins all over Europe began to glitch, Q was at home, packing. He’d already given away his cats, and the only things he was taking consisted of a single suitcase and his laptop. The train ticket Bond had sourced him sat securely in his pocket. He was cutting it a bit close, but there should still be time left before everything crashed. Literally.

In a remote part of Russia, Raoul Silva turned from the camera feeds to the man next to him. “Clever boy,” he commented, to which Bond merely smiled, as they watched the chaos unfold.

#12

Title: Buggering Off Author: AtoTheBean Warnings: None Summary: He shouldn’t hope...

JB: Where are you? Oh, for fuck’s sake.   NLQ: How did you get this number? JB: That doesn’t answer my question, Q. NLQ: No longer Q, actually.  You’re not the only one who gets to retire and bugger off. JB: I came back. NLQ: Then you can carry on destroying someone else’s tech. JB: ... JB: Please. I need to talk with you.  Just give me a hint. He shouldn’t hope… shouldn’t invite this man into his fresh start.  His thumb hovers above the screen. He snaps a picture of the split-flap departures board, hits “send,” and runs for the gate.

#13

Title: (dis)quiet Author: azure3795 Warnings: none Summary: Waiting for an arrival.

Slots on the display board are flipping, a monotonous voice from the PSA intercom ever drowned out by the bustling of people arriving and departing drones on, and he waits.

He cradles a travel cup in his hands, the half drained beverage inside long since gone cold and sloshes around with dead weight. Logically, he knows it no longer provides the spot of warmth he seeks.

No matter.

“Q?”

He nearly jumps, but uses the momentum to plaster on a smile that doesn’t resemble a grimace. Good enough.

“Bond,” Q greets and thinks not of the Walther in his bag.

#14

Title: A Grand Romantic Gesture Author: scarytheory Warnings: none Summary: Q is waiting for his flight to Berlin.

He was drinking his second coffee when Bond came.

“What are you doing here? Don't tell me you're trying to stop me in some grand romantic gesture?” he was joking, but his smile faded when he saw Bond's reaction.

“Oh, God. You are, aren't you?”

Bond sighed: “I'm bad at this. I should have prepared a speech. Or should I sing?”

“Please don't.”

“Just… Can you please stay? For me.”

For a moment Q wished he could do that. But nothing would change, he knew that, and deep down, even Bond knew it.

“Goodbye, James.”

The plane was leaving soon.

Thank you to our amazing drabble writers for their contributions this week!

Edited: Voting is now closed and results are in! You can view them here!

[talkfastromance4]

Love drunk sos soooooo much!! What about reader getting drunk and when a friend brings her back home to cal hes obviously taking care of her and all and then she just blurts out that she does want to have babies with him even though they both agreed not to for the next 5 years or so and she just says how she cant wait and Cal is confused but in the morning he asks her if she really meant it (its up to you If she really did or not lolz) (-;

thank you so much bb! i’m so happy you all like drunk!sos :) this will be in cal’s POV______

Calum stayed home while you went to a wine fest with your best friend that started at 7 pm and when you got home by 12:30, with the loud noises you and your friend were making he could totally tell you were wine drunk.

He helps taking your purse and things while you two are giggling and laughing about who knows what. 

“You got a ride home or do you need to crash here?” Calum asks your friend as you try to climb up his body.

“I had Kyle come pick us up, he’s outside. Have fun,” she snickers then leaves.

“All right Pinot drunko,” Calum teases using his strong arms to keep you from climbing on him, “let’s get you into bed. You’re gonna have such a headache tomorrow, doll.”

“I like when you call me that,” you give him a loopy smile. “Hey Cally, guess what.”

“What?”

“Natalie’s sister is pregnant, isn’t that so sweet? A little baby,” you pout with bi doe eyes.

“Yeah that’s great, baby. I’m happy for them,” he kisses your head helping you undress.

“I want a baby,” you mumble and Calum is taken aback. Did he hear you correctly?

“What?” he asks leaning closer.

“Baby! I want a baby, Cal!” You whine falling onto your bed. “With your nose and cheeks and dark hair. She’d be beautiful like you. And I know. . . I know, I know we said not for a long time but I’m ticking away! I don’t want to be an old mom! I wanna be a cool mom.”

You giggle then at your Mean Girls reference then sigh happily as you snuggle into the pillows. 

“You told me you want to travel the world with me first,” Calum brushes your hair from your face.

“Who needs the world when I have you?” 

***

The next morning Calum brings you coffee in bed with some toast and ibuprofen and a question that’s been burning in him for the last 24 hours. He watches you drink and eat in silence, trying to figure out how to ask you.

“Thank you,” you say.

“Do you really want to have a baby now?” he blurts out and your eyes widen.

“What? I didn’t--ohh no,” you groan hiding your face behind your hands. “Cal, I’m sorry. I just got baby fever, if you don’t want kids right now then it’s okay we’ve got plenty of--”

“I do want a baby,” he interrupts you.

“What?”

He scoots closer to you holding your hands. “I couldn’t stop thinking about what you said, having a little girl it just . . . I can’t get the image out of my mind. Having a baby with you? I want it. A lot more than I thought.”

“Really?” You smile happily and he nods. You launch yourself at him attacking him with a kiss.

He falls back on the bed, laughing underneath you. 

“We can start now, if you want,” he hints thin flips you over pressing his mouth to your neck.________

@galcalirwin @cashtonasff5sos @wokeupinjapanisabop @myloverboyash @rotten-kandy @tea4sykes @jannimoeller3

[alwaysanotherrainbow]

my boyfriend never texts first

Remus just wants to not be the first one to send a message every once in a while. That’s not too much to ask, right?

relationship: romantic remrom, background remy and emile (also romantic)

warnings: major character death, extended mourning (secondary warnings- brief discussion of religious holidays, brief underage drinking mention, a lot of all-caps) notes: unrelated, human, hs/college au. virgil, emile, and remy are here too. If you need anything in the secondary warnings (or one of those latter three characters) edited out, please let me know and I can put that up for you!

____________________________________________________

Remus always texted him first. Always. It didn’t matter the situation, didn’t matter the time date place name face. Who what when where why. It first started when he texted hi roman :) when they first got phones; for whatever reason, Roman just never texted first. Either he’d call or they’d talk in person.

No matter. Remus could cope.

May 1:

8:37 PM tody i saw you by my locker 8:39 PM *today 8:42 PM why didnt you say hi?

May 2:

9:30 PM a teacher talked to me today 9:30 PM wanted to talk about how i’m doing after 9:52 PM well you know. he’s a sick bastard

Really, it wasn’t too much to ask for, was it? He just wanted to see him text first once in a while! May 7:

3:32 PM: by the way idk if you got this last time 3:36 PM: my class ring size is the medium 3:44 PM: hopefully you order it by the deadline :P 4:03 PM: no idea when the deadline is 4:20 PM: bLAZE IT 4:24 PM: sorry i have like 0 money so i got it from the consignment shop 4:31 PM: i hope you like synthetic rubies!! leaving them with ur dad 10:40 PM: update. i cried for four hours with your dad.

June 2:

7:30 AM: gRaDuAtIoN dAy!!! 7:32 AM: there’s cookies in the reception menu 7:35 AM: snickerdoodles your favorite [eyes] 10:02 AM: i’m getting some for u 10:05 AM: [kissy face] 7:40 PM: the announcement was Weird 7:43 PM: anyways i have the snickerdoodles (Remus couldn’t go over to where Roman was staying, so he left them in the living room. He knew Roman would appreciate them. Hopefully he’d come over (wait, probably not, given...))

Well, actually, he could understand why he never texted first. June 11:

12:14 PM: roMAN 12:16 PM: [Attachment: Remus_Picani-Kleitman_Acceptance_Letter.pdf] 12:18 PM: YEAHHHH 12:24 PM: I’m sure you got in too SEND ME YOURS WHEN YOU GET IT 12:32 PM: WE MIGHT SHARE A ROOM YEA 12:35 PM: [Attachment: celebration.jpg]

Everyone was probably saying that he ought to just move on, but to be honest, he couldn’t... Actually, to be honest, no-one had told him to move on to his face yet. In fact, everyone was surprised he was doing so well, given how bad the circumstances were! The situation was stressing him out so much, even his dads were gently advising him to rethink things. (Well, that was part of the territory with one of them being a therapist and the other being a barista.)

“I got y’all some kouign-amann from the cafe,” said Dad, putting it down on the counter. His shirt had SLEEP scrawled on it with a Sharpie; it was the one that Remus had made for him as a joke. He still wore it. Huh.

“Sweetie, what’s a queen amahn?” asked Papa.

“It’s a... er, it’s like a... this is kinda like a croissant that had dreams of a muffin tin and salted caramel. One for you, babe.... then one for Doodlebug-”

“Can I leave some for Roman?” asked Remus.

They exchanged a glance.

“Of course you can,” said Papa with a smile. “Your candle’s on the table. Also, I got the news about being accepted into university? Good job, kiddo. You know, that was your father’s alma mater.”

“Are you sure you want to go to school right away after...? No problem taking a gap year.”

Papa glared at Dad. “Be nice.”

“I’m sorry, Remus, it’s just...” Dad put down his coffee. “If you’re not ready, if you need more time-”

"I’m sure,” said Remus with a grin, trying to get rid of what he just remembered. “Trust me.”

“Please find a good way to put away the snickerdoodles, they’ve been there since last week!” shouted Papa.

June 12:

12:12 AM: its twelve twelve make a wish 12:15 AM: hey when does your phone bill go out? 12:20 AM: im just saying that would Explain some things 12:22 AM: i know your dad pays Everything like a year in advance 12:34 AM: tell him i say hi 12:34 AM: 12:34 MAKE A WISH

July 12:

3:30 PM: guess who’s a double major in bio and theatre!! 3:32 PM: marine biology babey 3:53 PM: it’s good for the SOUL 4:04 PM: this cute octopus reminded me of you by the way 4:10 PM: [Attachment: for_roman]

August 14:

6:24 PM: moving in is the Worst 6:32 PM: by the way i got a single 6:35 PM: no roommates 6:41 PM: still have the bunk tho 6:44 PM: also got ur favorite pillo

August 30:

2:12 AM: roman it is like two o’clock in the morning what the Heck are you doing here, 2:15 AM: if u see me wave Hi 2:32 AM: ok >:c 2:42 AM: dont mind Me just studyin on top of the planetarium 3:15 AM: tbh i didn’t even know we go to the same campus? haven’t seen you around or anything 3:17 AM: shit phones gonna di

September 28:

2:20 PM: i failed my test 2:22 PM: idk what to d 2:24 PM: *do

September 29: 7:30 PM: remember that octopus you gave me that eats negative emotions? 7:32 PM: it works!!

October 3:

1:10 PM:  You’d like the theatre program, really 1:15 PM: just so u know they’ve listed your name as an ‘honorary member of the class of’ 1:19 PM: that’s really nice of them. idk if your dad knows

October 23:

9:45 AM: i had to explain one of our inside jokes 8( 9:52 AM: i can’t Explain the deodorant thing that was One Time 9:55 AM: also why i’m called The Duke 9:56 AM: its bc you said it. not my fault 9:58 AM: its still cute pls call me that still 9:59 AM: pancake brunch pancake brunch pancake brunch October 31: 6:12 PM: sun’s down! joyous samhain 6:15 PM: i remember when you sewed me that octopus btw, the one that eats ucky feelings 6:19 PM: how long did it take you to get the laurel sachet into it?? 6:34 PM: also thank you thank you thank you for helping me find a friendly church to celebrate all saints day 6:47 PM: that year was a NIGHTMARE because you forgot to get your white candles and carnelian, and i forgot my holy water, so we were driving around town like Madmen 6:59 PM: it was worth it though 7:03 PM: i left you a script, i think you’ll like it.

November 9:

11:19 PM: i miss you so so much.

November 10:

12:20 AM: ignor this i drank like 12:24 AM: a lot 1:15 AM: i’m sorry i should’ve been with you 1:22 AM: i shouldve been there With You. 1:45 AM: but i wasn’t 2:20 AM: i didn’t know thered be a 4:11 PM: shit i just saw these. Sorry to bother you December 2:

10:10 AM: hey roman, been a bit. yea sorry about last time. too much of the Alcohol 10:13 AM: gonna go over to my parents’ house 1:00 PM: if you wanna come over, you can. dad’s making snickerdoodles and papa’s gonna watch atla (yes i still have that dvd you got me do not @ me it’s with your candles on your table just like everything else) 1:03 PM: that was on the dot, i’m happy.

December 21

8:34 AM: hey, it’s snowing 9:13 AM: couldn’t help leaving you some hot cocoa. and snickerdoodles of course 10:12 AM: i love you Remus went to go help his dads with making breakfast, but by the time everyone was done cleaning and they had finished watching some shitty Hallmark movie, he remembered that he had left his phone upstairs. Going upstairs and looking at it, he felt something in him break.

[2 Unread: Roman <3, bf’s dad]

10:22 AM, Roman <3: Why are you texting this number? 11:15 AM, bf’s dad: Remus, disregard that last, I’m so sorry. I just found his phone and I saw only the recent message first

The phone started ringing. Remus answered it as quickly as he could.

“I’m so sorry Mr. Sanders I didn’t know that someone was actually getting these messages I thought the line was out,” he said within a few seconds before the person on the other side sighed.

“No, it’s quite all right. And Virgil’s all right, by the way, if you prefer. I... I was just looking through his things for the first time. You know, it being a holiday and all... Memories, things like that.”

“Yeah, I understand.”

“I just turned the phone back on, I’m getting a lot of messages.”

“Oh.” Remus stared at the wall, trying to come to terms with everything. “Well, I--”

“I’m not going to stop paying for his phone. I’m sorry, I just... I still have his voicemails on it, and I can’t stand the thought of it going offline either.”

“Right, I... I listen to it too.”

“I happened upon the last one he sent to you.”

“You looked at the messages?”

“I only looked over when I stopped getting new ones, but I saw the last question he sent you. For your ring size.”

“Yeah? He asked my ring size so that he could--”

“There’s no easy way to say this, but.. I found something of his. Can you come over?”

“I’m sorry, I can’t, but can you please tell me what it was? Please?”

“I really think I should tell you this in person.”

“Please, Mr. Sanders. Please, I... I can’t manage that.”

He sighed. “All right, Remus. I found an early acceptance letter to SJAU, and... and a ringbox.”

Remus felt his grasp on the phone grow weak. It fell onto the bed, Mr. Sanders’ voice still clear.

“I think he was going to ask for you to....”

“No, we... We were just out of high school, I-- that doesn’t make sense.”

“He always was one for those romantic gestures. There’s some poems here, too. A life-plan. I’m not sure exactly what malacology is, but--”

“Mollusks. Like octopi and squids.. Sorry for cutting you off, what was that?”

“Some of it’s in your handwriting, but one of the entries is ‘ask him’, for the day after... you know.”

God, he could hear his sad smile through the phone. He knew exactly how Mr. Sanders looked right now just talking to him, probably wearing that hoodie that was too big on him, in a dusty room full of things that used to belong to the most vibrant person that Remus had ever met.

But then Roman had died.

He was the most wonderful person, and he had just died.

“I’ll come over to deliver the ring to you. Is that okay?”

“Yeah. Yeah, that’s... that’s fine. Uh, call my dads first, though. They’re still not convinced I’m doing okay.”

“I understand. I’ll talk to you later, Remus.”

“Thank you, Mr. Sanders.”

The line went dead in his hands.

Remus held himself and wept.

December 28:

12:30 PM, Remus Picani-Kleitman: Mr. Sanders, would you like to come over for our New Year’s party? 12:34 PM, Remus Picani-Kleitman: It’s a tradition we had. You don’t have to if you’d rather not. 12:45 PM, Virgil Sanders: I’d love to go.

January 1:

12:00 AM: HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!! 12:05 AM: [Attachment: :)] 12:07 AM: we are all smiling in this photo and for that i think we deserve a hug. 12:10 AM: this rings the most beuatifl thing i’ve ever fuckign seen. thank you,, 12:14 AM: never gonna get rid of it <3 12:16 AM: it looks Good on my finger 12:30 AM: jsyk your dad’s asking my dads for the kouign amann recipe 12:32 AM: thats a pastry, i left those for u a while back 12:39 AM: okay i’m crying a bit but honestly, i love u 12:44 AM: I love you so so so much, Roman

Somewhere out there, whether it was from some wonderful paradise or beyond the veil or even only in wishful thoughts, Remus knew that someone was saying I love you too.

[mgrgfan]

Past of the future, future of the past...

Chapter 9. A strange beginning

25.06.2000, 20 years after the Shift Neighborly Town, Sinnoh

Gentle ringing sound filled the room. With a sigh, a boy with long blue hair has removed the blanket and got up, doing morning stretches. After he was done, he took a shower, changed from his favorite dark pajamas to something more suitable and left his room, going down to kitchen for breakfast.

As always, his mom Deborah has made something amazingly-smelling and his dad Yakob was trying to start himself up with a cup of some horrifying caffeine mix, as dark as…

"Oh, and there you are, just in time!" said Deborah, as a figure has arisen from the shadows in the far end of the room.

"Suppose so. Morning, everyone," replied the Pitch-Black Pokemon, crossing the room.

"Morning, Darkrai," sighed Tobias, taking a seat. Yakob mumbled something welcoming too, then returned to drinking his crime against coffee. Darkrai visibly shifted away from Yakob, still having highly unpleasant memories about that one time he tried whatever infernal substance Tobias' dad was brewing for himself. There was a good reason it was once nearly classified as a chemical weapon, as a wide-awake Komala in Yakob's lab, who also made a mistake of trying this liquid insanity, could attest to.

After a wonderful breakfast (with Latios joining them soon after the beginning), the entire group started to pack up for today's trip in Unova. Thankfully, whatever unholy mixture Yakob was taking was sufficient to finally wake him up, so, he took the wheel, leaving Deborah, Tobias and Darkrai free to take seats, while Latios has cloaked and clung to the car's roof, loving the thrill of "riding" like that.

With a silent hiss, hydrogen started flowing into the fuel cells. Seconds later, with a quiet whine, wheel hub motors kicked in, driving the car away from the home and towards the Sunyshore City - specifically, the Theta Spaceport.

----

The not-so-young-anymore dragon silently flew underneath the forest's canopy, using the flexibility of its serpentine body to maneuver between trees. Something in the back of its mind screamed, that it shouldn't be going like this, that it should be soaring free in the sky, but immediate concerns continued to override it for many years.

Jet-black Legendary knew, that here, it was in relative safety. Humans would have massive troubles searching for it there. They won't risk using their horrific weapons there… or, at least, so it hoped.

Right now, it was nearing the edge of the forest, near the road from place, known to humans as "Pallet Town". It has decided to stay here for a bit, until the night comes… which should happen relatively soon, in fact.

Rayquaza took a rest on a tree, monitoring the situation around. Thankfully, the road wasn't used this often and Rayquaza knew, how to hide, so, even with its jet-black scales, it didn't have much trouble hiding.

Some time later, it has noticed a single young human, who was traversing down the road with two Pokemon at his side - a Pikachu and a Solosis.

Sky High Pokemon knew this human - quite a few years ago, this young human got lost in the forest and ended up taking shelter from rain under the roots of a large tree, together with a lot of Pokemon. Rayquaza knew this moment very well, especially since it also took a shelter there, coiling around others… and, despite worries of the Legendary, it all went pretty nice.

Sensing no one else of note around, the not-so-young dragon decided to take a risk and lit up the bioluminescent stripes, then flew almost right in front of the young human, even showing off a bit. While human did end up taking some device and pointing it at Rayquaza, evidently, it has malfunctioned and produced no result of worth… although Sky High Pokemon decided to stop doing the risky things now, darkened the bioluminescent stripes again and disappeared under the canopy of the forest, barely noticing Ho-oh flying above it, to which none of the participants paid much attention.

----

"Good afternoon passengers," sounded from the speakers. "This is the pre-boarding announcement for flight P-52-4 to Nuvema, Unova. Please have your boarding pass, Pokeballs and identification ready. Boarding will begin in approximately ten minutes time on Tower 12. Thank you."

Tobias, Deborah and Yakob nodded to each other and headed towards the appropriate access terminal. Two elevator and one travelator rides later, they were walking through the access arm to their vehicle, which was just finishing getting refueled with slush hydrogen and liquid oxygen. Seemingly short and stout (but only seemingly so), it, nonetheless, was capable of easily carrying up to 1000 people between any two points of Earth.

Family took their designated places, with Latios being confined to a Pokeball and Darkrai managing to secretly leave it and sneak into the shadow under Tobias' bunk.

"Attention, passengers, this is your captain speaking. The vessel will take off in ten minutes. Walkway is now retracting," sounded from speakers, as the doors to the outside world got closed and walkway got retracted. Passengers were still chatting, as they were taking their places and preparing for takeoff, some of them checking safety cards and/or watching the safety videos, some sharing their experiences, some merely talking… all was as usual.

"Attention, passengers, this is your captain speaking. The vessel will take off in five minutes. Make sure you're on your designated acceleration couch, safely strapped and with your Pokeballs put into the safe underneath it," sounded from the speakers again. Tobias, after a small check, found out Darkrai's small machination, but decided to stay quiet, knowing his oldest Pokemon partner all too well.

"Ten, nine, ignition sequence start, six, five, engine running fully... Liftoff! We have a liftoff on ballistic liner P-52-4! Tower cleared!"

As those words were being said, the plug-cluster aerospike engine has ignited and reached the nominal power. The launch clamps have opened too, letting the huge rocket soar into the sky and set the trajectory to suborbitals, while also making passengers experience moderate G-force. People, however, seem to take it just fine, some of them even joking about the flight being "Smooth, quiet and, in altogether, delightful experience".

Finally, all external fuel tanks ran dry and, with quiet dull clangs, separated from the rocket, starting their own flyback sequence to allow for easier recovery. In the meantime, ballistic liner finished the boost phase and entered the microgravity coast, with captain making another announcement:

"Good afternoon passengers. This is your captain speaking. First I'd like to welcome everyone on Talonflame Aerospace flight P-52-4. We are currently cruising at an altitude of 185 km at an speed of just under 7 km/s. The time is 1:25 pm. The weather under us looks good and with the lack of wind at the arrival point we are expecting to land in Nuvema with some fuel to spare. The weather in Nuvema is clear and sunny, with a high of 25 degrees for this afternoon. If the weather cooperates we should get a great view of the city as we descend. Right now, you will be able to unstrap yourself and to get some awesome views in the illuminators. I'll talk to you again before we reach our destination. Until then, relax and enjoy the rest of the flight."

Indeed, soon enough, people liberated themselves from the safety straps and started gathering around illuminators, with Darkrai managing to slip out of the shadows and get near Tobias too. While it did prompt some uneasiness, authority of Yakob and Deborah was sufficient to prevent it from escalating further, allowing a blue-haired boy and a white-haired Mythical to enjoy views of Earth from the space for a bit longer… until another announcement came through:

"Attention, passengers, this is your captain speaking. In five minutes, we will begin the flip maneuver. Please, return to your couches and strap yourselves back."

Grumbling, people have complied, returning back to their acceleration couches and strapping themselves in order to prevent flying away, when rocket fires maneuvering thrusters. In exactly five minutes from announcement, RCS engines rumbled and the rocket flipped around, pointing the main plug-cluster aerospike engine in the direction of travel. Soon, the main engine woke up again, decelerating the rocket a bit and correcting its trajectory.

The rocket plunged through the atmosphere, decelerating even further as it goes, with liquid hydrogen circulating through the truncated spike of main engine and cooling it down, allowing it to work as a heat shield. Soon, it ended its flight by a gentle hover landing, with exactly right position and heading to allow one of the access arms on the service tower to reach it. After the connection of access arm and opening of doors, Tobias and his family packed up and left the rocket, reaching their rented car two elevator and two travelator rides later.

As usual, human part of the family took their places in the vehicle, Latios cloaked and clung to the outside, while Darkrai stayed in shadows near the backseat.

"So…" started Tobias. "What's this conference's going to be about?"

"As always, yearly conference between researchers of Legendary and Mythical Pokemon," replied Yakob, driving the car to the hotel. "Thanks to your help, we've got some nice results."

"Yakob, if they ever try this again…" said Darkrai from the shadows in a pretty grim voice.

"I know, crouch, get to the nearest cover and wait for the Dark Void attacks to stop flying, then use the replicas of Lunar Wing over the victims, once you've cleared the area."

"Exactly. The fact of me deciding to follow Tobias and you two on my own volition does not mean me welcoming invasive experimentation."

"I sure remember the last time…" muttered Deborah in a strange voice.

"I didn't kill anyone back then, though," quickly replied the Pitch-Black Pokemon, as if slightly afraid, prompting Tobias to enter the conversation again:

"Mostly because of Latios with his Heal Pulse being capable of stabilizing their condition, until I was there to break the Lunar Wing replicas from my personal stash out."

"Yep. Exactly what I've counted on," said Darkrai, even leaving the shadow a bit and nodding.

"Not the best strategy… but, I guess, we'll have to let it slip for now." mumbled Tobias' mother, then sighed. "I hate the rocket lag, to be honest."

"We all do!" agreed everyone inside the car with her.

----

"Now arriving to the Space Colony Core-Middleway," sounded in the cabin of "Drapion" Galarian deep space transporter, as it was slowing down and preparing to dock to the still-unfinished Bernal Sphere - a greatest testament to the insane race of the Space Fever, alongside with automated factories on the Moon, as well as mass driver, which was used to deliver parts of the colony into space, where they were assembled.

"Finally…" mumbled a remarkably unremarkable human, cradling some strange case in his hands. Soon, a quiet, dull "clang" announced, that the ship has docked to the gigantic space installation. Man, blending in with the rest of passengers of the Earth-L5 express, left it through the docking tube and went through a route few people knew, heading straight to the biolabs block on the equator of the sphere.

Inside the Lab 14, another man was already waiting for him.

"So?.."

"Recovered," said the newcomer, opening his case and extracting a strange, tubular device with a faint glow inside the transparent middle section. "You have no idea, how hard it was, though. But old Fuji built some stuff real sturdy."

"Heh… brother was sure like this… was."

The colonial sighed, knowing too well, what's happened back on the planet, then went for another question:

"What about the second specimen?"

"Was unable to recover."

"Well… I guess we'll have to do with only her for now."

"I guess."

The newcomer gave the device to the colonial scientist, who, gently cradling it, took it to the adjacent room and placed it on the table, starting to connect it to the equipment.

"Lessons were learned, mistakes will not be repeated," mumbled the scientist, working on the device and, from time to time, looking at a huge empty biogrowth tube behind him. "I just hope you'll understand me, when the time comes…"

----

"Your Majesty?" sounded a message from the comm app.

"Yes?" replied the Empress.

"Project SAS is going almost as planned. Phase 2 is at 70%, industrial automation is progressing surely, second level networks are almost established."

"ISFs 3, 5 and 9?"

"Gave us all-clear on the technical side."

"And… what about possibility of Scenario 5?"

"Non-zero, but not too great. Roughly 3.6% possible."

"3.6% - not great, not terrible," concluded the Empress, before the call has ended and she relaxed in the chair, remembering, how has it all started fifteen years ago...

----

The Empress was sitting in her chair, listening to the group of scientists, who were standing before her and telling about a plan - a very audacious one, but, given, what has happened a week ago, worthy of consideration. When they've finished giving the explanation, she stood up a bit, walked to the window and, looking at the city outside of the Palace, asked:

"Automation of the economy, huh?"

"Yes, Your Majesty."

"And… what does it promise for the Empire?"

"Well… an economic solvency that will eclipse that of the rest of the world, no corruption, once it's fully implemented, highly-reactive planning, allowance…"

"Enough. Tell me one thing… Does it mean, that, should it be fully and completely implemented, I will lose my power and be, in fact, left without ability to rule the Empire, remaining merely a face of the new, automatic government system?"

"... Yes."

"And… will this system bring more prosperity to the Empire, than I and the rest of the current rulers can?"

"... Yes."

"... Then you have my full approval."

"... Huh?"

"You are to begin the implementation process as soon as you can. If sacrifice of my position and power will mean the best for the Empire - I am ready to do that."

"... As you wish."

The group of scientists left the room, leaving Empress looking in the window and thinking, whether this decision was right or not and should she cancel this project, while there's still some time left.

Author's notes: The ballistic liner Tobias and his family rides is based on ITHACUS global transportation rocket; The "Drapion" is based on a real project of a "Scorpion" general-purpose space transportation system; Space Fever will be explained more, as the time goes; Can you guess, what was the device the newcomer gave to the scientist on the space colony? The hint is in the only name mentioned in this section...

[shytiff]

Small Dec Wins

i cant believe its December already tf?!?!?!

1 - poli KIA today. saw a mother who cant feel the movement of their baby. the senior midwife tried to find the baby’s heart beat but not finding it. she said she hopes she were wrong. fell asleep at 3pm-ish, woke up super hungry. ate. i swear i feel like my weight when i measured it this morning was ~52, but after eating its close to 54 lol. eating banana and chocolate nextar is yummm. dalbang today is hella funny as always and suuper endearing. fell asleep after dalbang, didnt study hufttt

2 - today im at igd but joined azkia at vk for a bit to see partus. its not that im scared (maybe not consciously) but when the mom was being stitched i felt lightheaded, nausea, cold extremities, and i even had to squat multiple times because i couldnt stand. But i felt better after the partus so maybe seeing it was the cause. I did not feel scared at all honestly ._. and i’ve seen multiple partus before. i dont know why. i can literally feel my symphatetic tone giving out lmaoo. tried matcha latte with Cy matcha powder. it tasted more milky and grassy. mom thought it tasted like nori. i prever cocodeli alll the way (although Cy is cheaper). i think it also has a bit of caffeine that made me feel awake like a normal person should be. 

3 - today is vk but there’s no patient so thank god i saw sumn yesterday. did some cicil ukmppd in the morning accompanied by matcha latte. tried to order dufan tickets and i couldnt find my damn ktp...... fell asleep after worrying about said ktp

4 - matcha latte in the car, swab at lmk, went to dufan by tj with willy, had quite some funn with atikah nila willy amel pupuy. first time trying kereta misteri, quite fun. it rained after ashar so we didnt ride anything after that. turns out my ktp was at barel’s fotocopy lmaoo thankyou ara for picking it. went to solaria ancol afterwards, picked up by mom. i didnt tell her in the morning that i was going to dufan lmao. plenary @ zoom 19 pm. rapat nemo. fell asleep.

5 - went to lmk by tj to surprise clara. went back home and fell asleep. didnt rly do anything afterwards because this ragged body gets tired easily and i dont eat much recently. i can feel the difference before and after eating and there’s actual energy after eating. its not that im hungry though, but i feel less energized. felt annoyed terrible and just wanna lay in bed (this is unrelated with the less food in my system). even though i met up with friends

6 - after LOTS of sleeping i feel somehow better but not to a ‘normal’ amount. watched kimbab family videos. did power vinyasa by doogether with fianti. took a shower and ate indomie and i felt quite normal, except i slept again wtf. i thought i would have the second half of the day but nah. did self tryouts with fianti, 150 FDI questions. I got 96/150 right. huft. such a great reality check

7 - poli lansia with dokter isip, matcha latte in the afternoon rly helps me not sleeping the day away, packed up for depok

8 - poli umum with dr gita (helped doing phys exam), packed the rest of my stuff, ate some risol and matcha lattteee in the car, took swab results, picked up hazmats etc, zoom discussion with FT PKM Kalideres (dr gita) on the way, and i finally arrived at tamel. dinner is granola with vsoy. Taste like a slightly wet granola bar, nutty fiber-y vibe

9 - walked in ui with ara, managed to jog from the trees near st ui until kuburan bikun wow. i reached that point where my leg and heart were going in a steady unburdened pace and my willpower to keep going on was tested. tried the signature steak in Double U Steak by Chef Widi, while ara tried ribeye. the ribeye was more tender than the signature. but the seasoning in the signature is quite delish, salty and oily without being too much (like futago ya). read poppyland fast pass from ara’s phone omg season 1 is finally complete! went to coftof (omgggg i miss this place), it looks different now. ordered matcha latte and it tasted weirdly like a soy milk although ara doesnt feel that way. the matcha tasted weird. wont repurchase. read chainsaw man, its so entertaining, funny and deep at the same time. denji mess around and be too naive sometimes but hes lowkey hot lmaooo. aki is lovvvvve.

10 - first day at rsud budhi asih. had moesli combined with granola + vsoy for brekkie. went back to tamel at 3 pm. it rained when i got back. bought warteg lugina worth 32k. walked to sbux for tumbler day its been a while since i had their matcha latte. it tasted quite good, but not as good as i remembered (?) maybe bcs i asked for non fat milk. sbux closes at 8 pm for now hikss

11 - left tamel at about 7:10 and arrived on budhi asih at 08:54 yalll the traffic. Icu. Bought eatlah double and ate the salted egg part. Nap. ICU discussion with dr Dedi @8pm. I presented from my phone to save data hehe,,

12 - woke up at 8, eatlah brown butter for brekkie, symcard, saladstop's caesar salad for lunch (quite 'eneg' because i didnt eat the cheese evenly so the chicken and cheese were eaten last after the vegs are out. The vegetable's not that variative, and the non vegs make the salad taste delicious (albeit maybe not THAT healthy). Evening jog @UI and i realized i can get wifi sitting near the lake n library. Stared at the night sky from my room, i swear the sky seems super clear. Saw tiny fireworks in the distance

13 - ate muesli and saladstop’s banana walnut cake, symcard, bought moon chicken and saladpoint. lunch was egg salad and the wings. the original tasted so good like??? maybe i havent had msg for a while. also tried big bang, not too spicy which is nice. cicil ukmppd. put my laundry at buih barel lmaoo. try out with fianti. got 70/100

14 - breakfast was salad and leftover chicken. today was bangsal with angga armand. the geriatric patient has a loud murmur yall (and scoliosis, so much that the heart looks distorted). went to margo city to see sales, but when i think about it id rather just thrift stuff lmao. bought lugina. slept through kuliah guru besar. writing this in yellow truck coffee, that had 2 customers on the 1st floor including me. tried banana milk. yall after trying to drink less sugar the beverage tasted super sweet. my headache just goes away. sugar is magic but unhealthy whyyyyy.

15 - igd siang with indah. This body sure is frail. Did cbd with dr afifah AND rescheduled pleno. Rip mobile data i have to use for hotspot.

16 - ok today. Inserted goedel and did bagging. I bagged the patient the wrong way at first (too much). Thankfully the nurses were kind and taught us a lot :) watched some bts content. I feel like after reading househusband my tiktok page is now immensely funnier. Dalbang is also hilarious as always. Put on ginseng sheet mask (smells quite strong)

17 - bangsal. snacked on fried chicken. matcha latte starbucks (turns out its quite full here) and liqo about keeping our tongues in check

18 - arrived at icu. And then opened line. Turns out hadin's swab is positive, so agung kak iman and me have to isolate and swab. So i went back. Ordered kanayam chicken and fish and tempe. Nasi liwet tasted goood damn. Sleptt in the afternoon. Pleno at 4 pm (entered the room 4:30). Had no motivation to do anything. Azkia is getting married! Spent 20 mins formulating words to congratulate her lmaoo

19 - osce simulation, kak nanu was so kind and encouraging. Did try out solid. Lunch is fish bite pasta with melted cheese (cause i had to reach the minimum amount for promo). It got cold so its not that good (pairing it with self made mentai sauce, mixing the mayo and chili, is way much better). Jogged in ui (and searched for wifi). Approached by someone selling haraus coffee (25k), saying that some earnings will be for charity. Its basically sweet. Can barely taste the coffee.

20 - had kanayam for lunch (brekkie is almost always muesli lately). The nasi liwet tasted much better the first time. Walked to yellow truck coffee in the pouring rain. Got banana milk. Saw webinar ksk (electrolyte correction and dr nadhira talkshow). What i got from it is that, dr nadhira is a different person from the first place. Shes visionary, knows what she want and not afraid to reach it. The mindset is different. Even if i try as hard as her, her propensity to growth is different. Cicil ukmppd. Try out with fianti (got 72/100). Talked for an hour about love and marriage and engagements (there are so much of it lately)

21 - leftover kanayam for brekkie, also ate roti salman in cikini st. swab today (met kris, nessa and others). muesli for lunch. i thought my body felt a bit warm, so i decided to find sumn to eat. tried kedai abu bakar’s spaghetti brulee. its okay. maybe because its not too cheesy or meaty, mainly bechamel sauce. the one pupuy made is much tastier. finished the whole 10x20 portion in 2 eating sesh. cicil ukmppd @ bed in the evening (somehow felt refreshed enough to be able to concentrate in bed)

22 - went early to icu to put dops form. lugina for early lunch. i feel like my metabolism is faster? or my body is not so much in calorie deficit mode anymore and it got greedier lmao i used to just ignore hunger but not now, for health. starbiiies tumbler day. ordered black tea latte with non fat milk and vanilla syrup (because raspberry syrup is no more). did cbd geri ppt. 

23 - finally knew the swab result bcs kak iman asked kak farras. thankfully negative. igd with jordi. quite a few chances to do iv line, but i failed 2 times. managed to do iv injection to insert 2 drugs. saw the worst cpr ive ever seen in my life. its too slow, with maximal interruption. fish bite for lunch. wasted the rest of my day

24 - originally intended to run but i cant bring myself out of bed. packed up my stuff. picked up by mom. got the paper result of swab, got ksk from kelvyn @ capitol. can finally drink self-made matcha latte again, but it tasted horrible. i know cy matcha doesnt have that much going on, but even this is low even for them. previously i was starting to get used to the grassy smell.

25 - my lil bro remarked “maybe shes depressed because she doesnt have her chair”. fuck yall. this “depression” that im in is caused by this very place and the people. and im supposed to still muster the strength to study for ukmppd AND get my face together for solid book photoshoot. that shit is too much. this is why the money that goes to cafe, and the bike ride there is worth it for my sanity. after showering, things felt a bit better. had absolutely no will to study today. ate muesli with a bit of matcha latte.

26 - muesli for breakfast. matcha latte is lyfff ive probably said this before but it ~somehow~ makes me feel normal and not in a slump. like im a regular person. with normal moods. and not wanting to sleep all the time. i try to do ukmppd exercises but the pace is so fucking slow, bcs im distracted by get rich haha,,,. the latest potn update (64) is omgggg the mixed feelings? love? hate? anger? everything and nothing? the ~tension and passion~? im obsessed. watched a ton of bts content today and yesterday lmao.

27 - nasi kebuli for brekkie. went to flavola, im the first customer lmao. tried kopi susu coklat, tasted quite close enough to janjiw’s kopi soklat. had the same ~improved mood and concentration~ effect. tried to read ksk. bought milky banana 1L from puyo to give dajen (its his bday yesterday) (i feel prompted (?) to gift people when theyve given a present to me) (because my love lang is not gift giving at all so i barely think abt gifts lmao). talked with sum 33 ipa guys @ dajens house. yay appropriate amount of social battery charging. tryout with fianti, padi this time. got 67/100. 

28 - ate muesli with matcha latte after breakfast. cicil ukmppd. Listened to yoongi's vlive until i fell asleep lol. 2 burger and salad for dinner. omggg hansol revealed his gf. 

29 - spent half of my day tidying up the mess that is my room. figured out what to wear for solid book photoshoot with fianti, ara. matcha latte terosss. phd for dinner. 

30 - breakfast is muesli with cimory choco hazelnut. mom made matcha chocolate brownies. tryna study. slow pace terosss. read some padi materials. dalbang.

31 - bought vsoy low sugar and multigrain. moved my body a bit to youtube videos. showered. felt better. it also rained (which i love). the pleasant mood only lasted til the evening. did nothing from 7pm even though im not sleepy. cant tell when did i start to sleep

and just like that, 2020 kkeut. its sad to say i dont rly remember much remarkable things this year. other than the trip and memories with minor rotation friends. i just remember wasting my life away in my house. i guess that’s the danger of living a monotone life. sometimes you gotta invest some time to have fun, to have motivation to live on and do things. not doing this makes it difficult to live day by day. and friends. meeting friends, seeing new stuff. that helps me live. 

[its-norea-wong]

Yall don know crap about me so here:

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk? More cereal than milk. I don like to have a bowl full of milk after.

2: do you like the feeling of cold air on your cheeks on a winter-y day? Yes.

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books? Random pieces of old sketch paper I have lying around everywhere.

4: how do you take your coffee/tea? I drink green tea as is. I’ll have that or cocoa, with milk and sprinkles.

5: are you self-conscious of your smile? Yes, I don smile often.

6: do you keep plants? Yes, I have a small sunflower in my window.

7: do you name your plants? Yes, her name is Vivi. Don fuking judge me.

8: what artistic medium do you use to express your feelings? I use oil paints.

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself? Yeah, I hum to the music I play when I draw, sketch and/or paint.

10: do you sleep on your back, side, or stomach? Sleep? Hah, I don’t, but If I take my sleeping pills like I’m suppose to, usually on my side.

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends? Er allein, dem die Jugend gehört, gewinnt die Zukunft.  

12: what’s your favorite planet? Saturn.

13: what’s something that made you smile today? Watching Shiloh trip and fall.

14: if you were to live with your best friend in an old flat in a big city, what would it look like? I’m not going to live in the city once I finish school.

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is! It would take nine years to walk to the moon.

16: what’s your favorite pasta dish? Ramen.

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair? I want to get rid of the blonde patch at my routes.

18: tell us about something dumb/funny you did that has since gone down in history between you and your friends and is always brought up.  When I learnt German only to give our Jewish history teacher wwII flash backs. Nate was mad. I didn’t care.

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it? Yes and just small outfit ideas.

20: what’s your favorite eye color? Blue, purple or orange. Why? Idfk.

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces. My hello kitty little backpack that I brought with me from japan, I now use it as a purse when I go shopping. It confuses people.

22: are you a morning person? hell. no.

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations? Lay in bed till 4 pm.

24: is there someone out there you would trust with every single one of your secrets? Fuck no.

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into? The boy’s dorm room.

26: what are the shoes you’ve had for forever and wear with every single outfit? My black and pastel coloured converse.

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor? bubblegum.

28: sunrise or sunset? sunrise. I’m not a morning person but it looks nice.

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? no.

30: think of it: have you ever been truly scared? yes, when? I wont tell, unless asked.

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks. They’re okay ig, yes?, no, no, and no thanks.

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. I can’t really hang out with friends at 3 AM.

33: what’s your fave pastry? dessert mochii.

34: tell us about the stuffed animal you kept as a kid. what is it called? what does it look like? do you still keep it? It’s name is Kuma. It’s a brown fluffy bear. yes i do.

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often? not anymore, I used to write to my mom while I was at school.

36: which band’s sound would fit your mood right now? Bo burnham. That’s it.

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean? Clean.

38: tell us about your pet peeves! JB. just JB hitting on. every. single. guy. That or Shiloh. Just Shiloh being Shiloh. Also Bae thinking he’s better than everyone else.

39: what color do you wear the most? Black.

40: think of a piece of jewelry you own: what’s it’s story? does it have any meaning to you? I own a small necklace with purple beads. It has meaning to me I guess.

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving?  The One Safe Place.

42: do you have a favorite coffee shop? describe it! No.

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with? JB. 

44: when was the last time you remember feeling completely serene and at peace with everything? When I was 11.

45: do you trust your instincts a lot? Yeah.

46: tell us the worst pun you can think of. uhhhhh. To the guy who invented zero, thanks for nothing.

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? Store bought ramen. It’s so gross.

48: what was your biggest fear as a kid? is it the same today? Thunder and Lightning, and yes.

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought? The last CD I bought? Beetlejuice the musical.

50: what’s an odd thing you collect? Knifes. Pencils.

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? uhh. Jeremy with sad song by scotty sire.

52: what are your favorite memes of the year so far? Ugandan knuckles, i know its dead but it’s still my favorite.

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them? i love beetlejuice.

54: who’s the last person you saw with a true look of sadness on their face? idfk.

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? I climbed up a shelf at the library to prove that I could be tall.

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? no.

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? im not answering this one.

58: who’s the wine mom and who’s the vodka aunt in your group of friends? why? uhh idk.

59: what’s your favorite myth? Any Japanese urban legend.

60: do you like poetry? what are some of your faves? uhh. no.

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received? I once gave away some floppy hat that my step dad gave me.

62: do you drink juice in the morning? which kind? Yes, pineapple.

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? Yes. I make sure they’re organized on genre and then in the genre it’s alphabetized.

64: what color is the sky where you are right now? blue.

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with? My mom, but in order to do that, i’d have to die. :)

66: what would your ideal flower crown look like? Pink daises and sunflowers, small ones, plus some bits of lavender.

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel? Happy, it’s nice.

68: what’s winter like where you live? no snow, it’s like 60 degrees.

69: what are your favorite board games? idk.

70: have you ever used a ouija board? ya.

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea? green.

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? No, i have an okay memory.

73: what are some of your worst habits? I bounce my leg around whenever i’m not moving, that or I flick my pencil around.

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. big ass hole.

75: tell us about your pets! I only have one and she’s a blind kitty. She’s white with spots and has a fluffy tail.

76: is there anything you should be doing right now but aren’t? My homework.

77: pink or yellow lemonade? pink.

78: are you in the minion hateclub or fanclub? uhh i really don’t care

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? I was given a flower by some girl during lunch, i never got her name though.

80: what color are your bedroom walls? did you choose that color? if so, why? white, i didn’t get to choose cus I live in a dorm room.

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of. northern star.

82: are/were you good in school? ya i am.

83: what’s some of your favorite album art? idk.

84: are you planning on getting tattoos? which ones? no.

85: do you read comics? what are your faves? Ya i guess, and deadpool.

86: do you like concept albums? which ones? no. not really.

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? my neighbor totoro, kikis delivery service.

88: are there any artistic movements you particularly enjoy? not really.

89: are you close to your parents? I was close with my mom.

90: talk about your one of you favorite cities. tokyo. i don’t have to explain.

91: where do you plan on traveling this year? no where.

92: are you a person who drowns their pasta in cheese or a person who barely sprinkles a pinch? i don’t put cheese on my pasta.

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most? Shaved under my lil floof bangs.

94: who was the last person you know to have a birthday?  Jeremy.

95: what are your plans for this weekend?  Draw.

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? I update immediately.

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house? INTJ - The Mastermind, libra, and huffle puff.

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? idk and no.

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. no.

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why? 5 years into the past, and for reasons.

[experimentaldata]

When We All Fall Asleep, Where Do We Go

A Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood fic. 2748 words. Rated T - Smoking and alcohol mentions, war mention, mild language. Set in Season 1 roughly, pre Maes-Hughes-you know what. 

6:00 PM = Ed

   It was raining again. He hated the rain.

Not as much as the Colonel, of course. It’s not like it rendered him totally useless. But losing his limbs had turned him into a human barometer. Each drop in the pressure meant that his stumps ached, and the the pain usually lasted until the weather changed. He’d woken up the night before from the pain, then slept uneasily until it was time to report for duty that morning, careful not to stir. He didn’t want Al to see how much it hurt him. Al had enough to worry about as it was. And he’d only blame himself. Ed could see the looks Al gave him when he thought he wasn’t looking. So he’d stayed still, and gotten up like he normally did, exuding only his typical amount of grumpiness. Thankfully, their day hadn’t involved a lot of moving around. They’d spent it in the East City library, reading and re-reading alchemy texts until Ed’s eyes ached almost as much as his arm and leg. Lieutenant Hawkeye had borrowed the Colonel’s car to drive them back to their hotel room, and left them with a picnic box for dinner, courtesy of the Hughes.

    Ed ate the entire crock of chicken soup and four whole wheat rolls despite himself. It had been a long day, and the warmth from the food sank into every crevice, warming him inside and out. He described the taste to Al, who added it to the “to eat after my body’s back” list. The pain receded to the background as he ate. In its absence, he felt hollowed out - the tension keeping him on alert had finally let loose. Then it hit him. The wall he had held up all day against fatigue was finally breached. That darned soup. He told Al not to wait up for him, he was just gonna finish some research in their room. And he tried, he really did. Sprawled out on the bed, his jacked and boots tossed over the chair in the corner, he willed his eyes to stay open. Just one more page. Maybe chaper 5 of Complete Biological Processes for Alchemists would have the answer. Maybe if he held his head up. Loosened his collar. Put his head on his arm. Rested his eyes just for a second.

8:00 = Al

    Al hadn’t heard from Ed in awhile. He wondered how long it would take him to fall asleep. Ed thought he could hide it, but Al knew it had been a bad pain day. He always knew. It must’ve been really bad for him to go to bed this early--usually he stayed up at least until he had eaten dessert. The double slice of cherry pie Mrs. Hughes had packed was still on the table though, next to the bottle of milk, both untouched. Al could only imagine how warm and fragrant that pie was. He scribbled a note about it in his food journal, then went to go check on his brother. As he suspected, Ed was sprawled out face-down on the bed, his head laying on his right arm. His shirt was hiked up a bit from tossing and turning, and one of his socks had fallen to the floor. Al shook his head. Sleeping with his tummy out again. And no blanket. He crossed the room softly and laid the blanket from his bed over his brother. Ed didn’t move. Out like a light, he thought.

    He sat down in the chair by Ed’s bedside. It would be nice to sleep himself. He’d almost forgotten what it felt like to fall asleep. He remembered so much about what it was like to have a body - he could imagine the taste of foods he’d tried before, the feeling of his favorite clothes and blankets, even smells he liked. Falling asleep, however, was a memory that eluded him - it was something you felt by not feeling anything, after all. But about a year into heir quest to get their bodies back, he had developed a work-around. He couldn’t sleep anymore, at least not like other people. But he could dream. It had started as small bursts of deja vu during the lonely nights he spent watching over Ed. Over time, he had figured out how to enter his memories at will each night, reliving them in a daze until he lost track of time. It wasn’t quite as good as sleeping, but it took him away from this body, and this strange place they were living, if only for a few hours. He leaned back in his chair and looked inward, calling up whatever memory his soul decided to play back for him tonight. And then Winry walked into the classroom, and those boys were teasing her, and he was telling Ed not to--

10:00 = Riza

    Riza felt like a frayed rope. The week had been meetings on top of PT exams on top of paperwork Roy forgot to file. She’d strangle that man, Colonel or not, one of these days. All he had to do was sign his name and save the both of them from a week of heartache and a note to his file. But that might get in the way of his sucking-up time. Stupid state dinners, that sort of thing, she thought with a laugh. She poured herself another ounce of bourbon and sighed. It was getting late. Black Hayate was curled up in her lap, twitching in his sleep every so often. Probably hunting rabbits in his sleep, she thought with a smile. At least one man in my life never lets me down.

    She took a long sip of her drink and sighed, letting her head sink into the back of the chair. No end in sight to all this chaos. Roy’s ambitions of becoming Fuhrer and current position as colonel meant he was forever in strategy meetings, personnel conferences, and diplomatic events. And he always wanted the hawk’s eye there to watch his back. She could read a room faster than he could blink, and their five-minute post-meeting conferences proved more useful than weeks of departmental consulting. Never mind that she had her own men to attend to, and that she was stuck cleaning up the mess after Roy was inevitably late with something, again. And he wonders why I drink, she thought. Well, that was one reason. There were other reasons why she needed help from a bottle to sleep at night. But she wasn’t going to dwell on that. No need to remember the past, in all its technicolor gore and misery. That was then. This was now. Now was a fireplace, and an armchair, and Black Hayate snoring, and her clock chiming - ten o’clock already? Better head to bed, then. Early morning PT drill tomorrow, and she had some new recruits to beat some sense into. Slowly, she peeled herself up from her chair, swaying slightly as Black Hayate jumped down off her lap. She laughed at his little sleepy whine and--was that a hiccough? Damn. She’d had more than she thought. Oh well. Her head was going to hurt tomorrow regardless. She slunk back to her bedroom, undressed down to her undershirt and threw herself into bed.

12:00 = Jean

    What a night. First the cafe, a delectable steak and an even more delectable date. Damn, he thought, flipping over onto his back and pulling the blanket up. She was so hot. His eyes danced across the void of the ceiling as he traced the memory. From the cafe to that dive bar, where she had impressed him with both the quality of her conversation and the quantity of shots she could take down. She could drink him under the table, he thought, if they were going for that. But this was a Thursday night, so they left the bar and went instead to...a dance hall. Jean wasn’t exactly sure how that had happened. But he was sure of how he felt watching her move through the crowd. She had waist-length hair that tumbled down in waves to her waist, swaying as she did in time to the music. He chuckled to himself, and kicked his feet out from under the blanket. Still feeling the warmth from that one, he thought. He hadn’t wanted that night to end. But by eleven, the weeknight crowd had started to thin out, and in the absence of its energy, their conversation had stalled. A few minutes later, he was waving sadly at the bus as she sped off to her apartment. He stumbled back to his, alone.

    He didn’t know what it was about him. Every date he had had for the past long while started out well enough. They would talk, offer a cigarette, maybe get a coffee. Something would spark. They’d go out. And at about the 6-hour-of-acquaintance mark, she’d mumble some excuse about an early morning shift, or an elderly aunt, or...he thought one girl had even made up a kid sister she needed to babysit. Regardless, they’d thank him for the lovely evening, and there he’d be. Sleeping alone, like he always did. He heard the clock in his neighbor’s apartment strike midnight. Tomorrow morning was gonna be rough, he thought. He had to report at--0400? 0430? Sometime. The lieutenant would have his head on a plate if he was late one more time. Sleep. Now. Gotta focus on not focusing, Jean. Don’t focus on falling asleep. Just let it happen. Just breathe. In and out. In. Out. in. out. in...out...

2:00 = Gracia

    Being a mom is hard work, Gracia’s mother had told her. She remembered it well. That day when they had finally made it to her family’s hometown, six months after they found out they were going to have Elysia. Her mom had thrown a big party at her childhood home, and invited all the surrounding friends and relations to stuff themselves on her home cooking and wish the newlyweds well. Gracia joked that she was trying to make everyone as fat-looking as she was to save face. Her mom had just laughed. And that’s when she told her, her eyes blinking back proud tears, how hard it was to be a mom, and how proud she was that Gracia was going to be one. It was one of her favorite memories of her mother. Her mother lived just long enough after that to see her granddaughter one time, on her first birthday. Three generations of her family were under the same roof, for the first and last time she could remember. It was heavenly. With her mother there, it seemed like nothing could go wrong.

    What she wouldn’t give for some of that magical mom power right now, she thought. She could see Elysia’s outline in the doorway, lit from behind by the hall nightlight. Somehow she had woken up right as her daughter crossed the threshold of their room, though she couldn’t hear anything over Maes’ snoring. Must be that special sixth sense moms get. Elysia had thrown up, it turned out. Her little face was stained with tears. She had tried to clean it up herself with her blanket, then stood in the doorway until mommy woke up. She knew she would. She was right. One set of fresh sheets, a warm washcloth, and a changed nightgown later, and her baby girl was tucked into bed again. She looked up at her mother and tugged at her sleeve. Would mommy sleep with her tonight? Gracia sighed. Between the kicking, the stuffed animal tossing, and the sleep talking (she inherited this from her father), sleeping with mommy meant mommy not sleeping much at all. But those brown eyes looked up at her, and Gracia melted the same as she did the first time she saw them. Yes, mommy will sleep here tonight. And now, installed in the toddler bed with her daughter’s feet planted in the small of her back, there was nowhere else she’s rather be.

4:00 = Pinako

    Old age changes a person. It used to be, Pinako thought, shifting to her left side, that she could just look at a bed and fall asleep. A lifetime of hard work will do that to you. She had proudly worked her way through four years of uni, two more of automail training, and another two of apprenticeship without ever missing a night. Early mornings were when she got her best thinking done, anyway. And that’s how it had been for the past forty years. But as she neared seventy, things were changing. She slept fitfully now. Every small noise might wake her up, even the ones she was used to. Tonight, it was the dog barking at heaven only know’s what. She muttered some choice words and eased herself off of the bed. Better go shut that dog up before he wakes up anyone else.

     She found the dog on the porch, holding the freshly-killed mouse he had caught in his mouth. More like a cat, that one was. Well, it was good for him to earn his keep. She patted him on the head and sat down in her rocking chair. She had left her pipe on the end table beside it. Hmph. Getting forgetful in her old age as well as sleepless, she thought. She tamped down the bowl and lighted her pipe, blowing a test smoke ring out into the starry night sky. Yep, still got it. She smiled contentedly and smoked for awhile, the dog curled at her feet. It was quiet out here. A light breeze whispered in the apple trees her and Yuriy had planted so long ago. The pipe got a little too warm, so she set it down and just rocked for a while. Maybe I should just stay out here tonight, she thought. Not like I was getting much sleeping done inside. It was going to be time to get up in a few hours, anyway. Just stay here, keep rocking. Let the wind blow. Stay quiet. Be still. Rock back. And forth. and back. and forth.

6:00 = Roy

    Ishval. All he ever thought about these days was Ishval. The rain wasn’t helping. He had been stuck inside going to meetings all week. Mind-numbing stuff. This is not why he’d signed up to be a state alchemist. All these meetings and paperwork were getting in the way of...what? Sometimes, if he was being honest, Roy didn’t really know. At first, the path had been clear. Take this job, accept this assignment, fill out these forms. Drag yourself through enough mud, they’d assured him, and your gilded cage was waiting for you at the end. So he had, in central command, then at Briggs, and then - Ishval. There were some things you just couldn’t unsee, things that played out again and again on the blank wall you were staring at, trying desperately to put out the fires in your mind so you could sleep.

    Tonight, it was the hospital camp they had taken, early on in the conflict. His superior officer assured him that the wounded were to be taken alive, as prisoners, unless absolutely necessary for the safety of their men. The position they held was valuable, and wounded Ishvalans didn’t pose much of a threat. But of course there’d been complications. It was an ambush. The rebel troops burst at them from all directions, and the order was given to light up the camp. Together, he and Kimblee had reduced the entire area to ash and rubble. They’d celebrated that victory that night, bits of wheelchairs and stretchers littering the ground around their bonfire. Another victory like that might have killed him.

    Roy rolled over to his other side and willed himself to close his eyes. He hadn’t slept a wink all night. Make that the past three nights. Damn, this rain had to stop. He could hear it pattering merrily on the windowsill outside, mocking him. He felt so useless in the rain. Lately, he’d felt useless anywhere. What was this all even for? What was he trying to do? Could a country like Amestris really be saved? Could it come back from the brink of destruction? Could it ever atone for Ishval?

    Just as his mind had given up trying to solve that conundrum, he jerked awake. His clock struck 0600. Time to get up.

[timelvss]

Love Heist

parings: lee taeyong | ft. some nct kids 

genre: criminal!au / romance, angst

warnings: language, gore (mentions of blood) 

word count: 11.4k 

description: and suddenly a switch inside taeyong flipped, that wasn’t your boyfriend anymore but there was no chance you were letting him do this alone.

author’s note: this fic has been in the works since about august of last year, it was meant to be a halloween fic but that didn’t happen..... anyways, i would really appreciate feedback on it, it’s literally my favorite fic i’ve written so far and thank you for waiting for it :( shout out to my pals for reading it and helping me through it 

At the moment you hadn’t thought about how bad things really were until now that you saw the familiar gun laying on the floor across from the coffee table and a couple of bullet shells laying around it. To say the apartment you both were in was a mess was an understatement, there was glass shattered across the floor (from the tiny coffee table that used to stand) and papers scattered all over the floor. Not that it was your own apartment, but it was still a pain to look at the mess that surrounded you. There was multiple questionable stains on your clothes that annoyed you and your body ached of exhaustion but someone had to keep a watch while the other slept. How did it get like this? you mentally asked yourself as your eyes wandered to the man whose head was in your lap. His hair was now a bloody red color instead of the brown one he cared so much for back then. He almost looked peaceful while he slept, his hands were bloodied and you could only remember his smirk across his lips as he pulled the trigger on the stranger in the bathroom. 

  It all began when you met him, the stranger who somehow turned your life around with just a look. He was the boy with the pretty smile and gentle eyes that everyone seemed to love, he always seemed like the kind of guy you’d bring home to your parents. When you met him at the bookstore he was holding an HTML & CSS3 for Dummies that you remember pointing out, while on the other hand you were holding the latest book in the Percy Jackson series. The both of you talked about your picks and were soon exchanging numbers. That’s how it began, simple. 

On the many dates the both of you shared, the two of you learnt plenty of things about the other. For example, Taeyong actually dropped out of MIT in the middle of his senior year just to join the opening of the local paper in their IT position while you on the other hand had barely graduated with an english degree. Despite your degree, you still doubted your whole literature knowledge once you graduated. He also shared his hobbies and interests with you, like how he enjoyed singing and making up raps on his free time to avoid the stress of crashing networks and moving hundreds of files to newer servers. Taeyong was the main IT guy in not just only your local paper but in the ones surrounding your small town, usually this meant that he traveled a lot from city to city.

Soon after meeting Taeyong the local newspaper started printing various articles saying that multiple chain large businesses were losing money by the millions in a matter of minutes every other night. Well, they weren’t exactly losing money, it was more like it was being stolen but no one knew exactly how it was being done besides it being through online transactions. The police was doing everything in its power to track the online transfers that were being done but the hacker of the crimes left little to no clues regarding his identity or location. A few days after the online transfers were posted on the newspaper, they posted a new story that detailed the findings of the money at various places scattered around town and even at the entrance of surrounding towns nearby. The money was always found in balloons that were filled with hundreds of bills stuffed inside them, which could only make you smile. These balloons were found at homeless shelters, orphanages, churches and places that desperately needed money yet no one knew the one who was doing it.

  The unknown transactions were soon discovered at various computer cafes throughout the city, though whoever was doing it left no track of which computer was used even when all of them were thoroughly checked. This only led more papers to mock the city police, its investigators, and for the person doing the robberies to take advantage of the popularity and go to bigger things. While all of this was happening you lived a quiet life and chose to stay out of these sort of things, though listening to the story unfold was kind of a guilty pleasure. When you and Taeyong would meet up at various places, the both of you would talk about the events and how your lives were. 

“You know, this person doing all of this can’t be all bad if they are literally handing out money to the ones in need,” you said as the both of you walked down the street nearing the small cafe on the corner.

“That’s what I think too, they must have a good heart.” You could only nod at Taeyong’s words as you leaned into him to take his hand in yours, smiling up at the man beside you.

  The next time you found yourself with Taeyong, you were laying down beside him on his bed. Your legs were lazily laying on top of his trying to warm up your toes as he read through one of his many computer books. One of his hands was resting on your thigh and his finger kept on tracing shapes on your skin while the other held up the book. The tv played in the background while you scrolled through various apps of social media, humming softly a tune that was stuck in your head. Neither of you were paying attention until the tv beeped with an alarm sound, making the both of you look over at it. Breaking News flashed across the TV and the image quickly shifted towards the anchor and a person on the field.

“Good night, this is N.City News and I am your anchor Moon Taeil. We bring you this breaking news to follow up the recent robberies occurring around town. Today at 1:27 pm, an alarm went off in our main offices with a banner that said, ‘We’re coming soon.’ Nothing of such was discussed with anyone outside our offices but tonight at 12:07am, money started raining from the air vents. We were told we are not the only place where this is happening, here we have our junior in training Huang Renjun to fill you in.”

The image shifted from the regular anchor to a younger man (though he still reminded you of a baby) holding a microphone up while police cars were around the building behind him. Your eyebrows only furrowed at the image trying to figure out what it was, but the blue and red lights were making it a little hard to focus. A small gasp came out of your lips as you looked at the building behind the guy. It was the pet shelter you’d always volunteer for, you remember taking Taeyong there with you and watching him play with the kittens. You found yourself smiling at the thought, but quickly shaking your head and looked back at the screen to keep up with the news.

“-right, Taeil, the money was also pouring out of air vents but in this case it was fixed so it wouldn’t fall on any of the cages. No money was thrown in with the animals yet the offices in the back along with the bathrooms and lobby were all flooded with thousands of one hundred dollar bills. The police are trying to gather as much of the cash as possible before the morning when it opens, but as they keep up picking it up the vents keep on pouring out  more. We have firefighters trying to figure out which pipe in the back it is so no sprinklers will go off.” 

As the Renjun kid finished the image was switched back to the one with Taeil, his hands neatly placed on the desk in front of him. “From what we were told by the authorities this recent heist of this robber was done from various unknown servers across the city causing it to be very difficult to almost impossible to narrow the search down a single one. We will keep you up-” before the achor’s sentence was done, Taeyong flipped the channel leaving you wondering about the rest of the story. 

  Being with Taeyong was something you never intended to happen, it just sort of did. His hand was always in yours and your lips always found their way to his, wanting more of him than what was probably healthy. That’s why it came as no surprise when he finally asked you to move in with him after eight whole months of officially dating and almost a year of just knowing each other. He shared every single one of his secrets with you and you confided in him all of yours. So there you were packing up the last of the boxes of your belongings, brown boxes scattered all over your living room as your best friend Ten helped you pack the mugs out of your kitchen.

“I can’t believe you’re actually moving in with this guy,”

“Ten, we’ve known him for almost two years please, also he’s literally one of your friends,” you gave Ten a look and he only shrugged at your comment before sticking his tongue out at you, continuing to wrap mugs in newspaper. You had introduced Taeyong to Ten after a few weeks of you guys officially dating, mostly because you wanted Ten to stop asking who was making you smile.

“Be nice to me or I’ll break your favorite unicorn mug.”

  Moving in with Taeyong was fairly easy to your surprise, he showed you nothing but love towards you which only made you feel welcomed. Now here three months later, you felt bored out of your mind stuck between the four walls of the empty apartment at almost midnight. It had become a habit of Taeyong’s to go with his friends every other thursday night for drinks and friendly bowling tournaments. He never came home drunk, but there was always a smile on his face when he returned. He also kind of sucked at bowling but you were still very supportive when he told you the stories when the both of you shared dinner. Every now and then you wanted to join your boyfriend on his bowling adventures but you always decided to give him a bit of space.

The following friday it was announced on the news that another robbery was done at the local branch of the bank in the middle of town, it was one of the bigger banks that had been targeted as of yet. By now the media had started calling this person the Robin Hood which only made you smile internally, he was really stealing money from the rich and giving it to the ones in need. His tactic wasn’t the right one but you knew he had good intentions which is why, secretly, you didn’t really want him to get caught. Of course, due to all the money being lost the police were heavy on his tracks, every other day they would do a press conference or maybe publish a comment on how they were getting closer to a lead. It had been published all over that millions of different bills had been written over and they all said, ‘you fools, i wish you luck trying to hunt me down’. Different newspapers published the news and it was also talked about in the evening news. The money was either left inside balloons or it somehow poured through the vents. There was so much money, that you couldn’t see the floor in some of these places, that was the only thing that never changed. 

“Hey love, I’m home,” Taeyong said as he slipped into the tiny apartment, your eyes followed the sound of his voice and noticed him taking off his shoes, “Did you miss me?” a cocky grin spread over Taeyong’s lips as he moved towards you, leaning down to press a kiss to your lips. 

You could only smile, this time he wasn't home as late as he usually was and you could only be thankful, it just meant you had more time with your boyfriend. “I don't know, you barely gave me time to miss you.” Taeyong walked towards the couch and flopped down next to you, stretching out his legs on the coffee table while you tucked your legs under yourself. The book in your lap soon forgotten as Taeyong placed a kiss on your forehead and turned the tv on. 

“Yes, Taeil, from what we were told, the latest heist of this robber was done three nights ago from, again, from various unknown servers across the city. Just like the previous ones, it’s been causing it to be very difficult, nearly impossible, to narrow the search down a single one. For what they have done, it’s been said by the authorities that this heist was of about half a million dollars, their biggest heist as of now. Although, only twenty five thousand have been given out so far to the local animal shelter this morning. In the usual way of balloons being filled with multiple hundred dollar b-” before the reporter’s sentence was done, Taeyong flipped the channel, leaving you wondering about the rest of the story again. 

“How was work?” you asked Taeyong as you let your legs stretch over his lap. Taeyong’s hands moved over your legs, massaging them softly as he turned to face you with a small smile playing on his lips.

“It was fine, Jungwoo was goofing off with the new intern. I think his name is Luke or something like that, I wasn't paying much attention when Doyoung was introducing him to me.” 

The rest of the evening went slow as the both of you shared the rest of your previous activities with each other. From how Yeri sent the wrong email to your boss to how this Luke kid made the printer print five hundred pictures of his cat. You could only smile at the stories Taeyong told you, but soon he was standing up and stretching as he tugged his shirt off in front of you. “I’m going to go shower, I’ll meet you in the bedroom,”

“Sounds good, I’m gonna clean up this mess of papers and I’ll meet you there.” 

  The apartment to begin with was not messy, the both of you always made sure to keep everything tidy. Which was something you picked up from Taeyong early on when you moved in. Not that he was a super clean freak but he liked things to be tidy and clean, which was why the pile of papers on your dining table were burning holes into the back of your head. Bringing the stack of papers with you to the couch, you flipped the channel back to the news which were talking about the weather. While putting the papers in two piles (the keep pile and the trash pile) your eyes caught one with fancy letters. The paper read, ‘you fools, I wish you luck trying to hunt me down’ written over and over again all over the paper in bright colored letters. Your eyes glanced back at the tv which displayed the paper that they had found earlier in the week, the same words plastered on the white piece of paper. 

There was a moment where you could only hear your heartbeat in your ears because there was just no way your loving and caring boyfriend could be doing these robberies all across town. There was just no way it was possible. Taeyong, pulling off a robbery? It was impossible, your boyfriend was too gentle. Shaking your head you folded the paper and hid it under one of the cushions on the sofa, hurrying through the rest of the stack and making your way to the bedroom. Desperately trying to forget about the existence of the paper.

Now, you wouldn’t call yourself a stalker, but after finding that paper there was always a nagging feeling in the back of your mind. Which is why on that same thursday, you found yourself in a rental car following Taeyong’s old Camery down the streets of the city. He had called you earlier to let you know he’d be coming home late since he was meeting up with his friends at the bowling alley. Which he did, only he had left twenty minutes after he had arrived there with a laptop he did not come with under his arm. Your eyebrows furrowed as Taeyong got back into his car and drove away from the bowling alley and towards the small internet cafe near the cafe place the both of you went on your first date. At this location, Taeyong lasted a total of six minutes inside the cafe and walked back outside a small bag in hand and no laptop within sight. 

After driving an hour to the edge of town trying to keep up with Taeyong’s hectic driving, he pulled up to a bank, but by this point he was no longer wearing his usual work clothes. A long black coat that went down to his knees covered most of him, he matched it all with black pants, a black tee, and some expensive looking black dress shoes. Although it wasn’t out of the ordinary for Taeyong to wear all black, it was to see him in slicked hair, he never did that. It was a new look on him and you could only feel a blush creep over your cheeks as your eyes followed the man. There was a black mask that covered half of his face but through the small binoculars you brought, but you could see the small scar on the corner of his eye. 

This Taeyong that walked inside the bank, he had another aura you had not seen on your boyfriend which made you curious and a little scared. Soon enough there was a bright light followed by a bang that made you jump in your seat. There were thoughts flying across your head, making you rub your eyes in frustration. This wasn’t your Taeyong. It just couldn’t be. Your thoughts were broken when you saw Taeyong walk back out of the bank, balloons filled with money in both of his hands and a splatter of red dots across his face. 

When Taeyong returned that night you were already in bed, he leaned over to press a kiss to your cheek and walked into the bathroom to shower. You had never paid much attention to his smell when he came home from his outings but somehow he now reeked of iron and you knew exactly why. Biting down on your lip, you made your way down to the living room, lifting the cushion on the couch your fingers shakily grabbed the paper you had hid days prior. The only difference now was that it was folded in more folds than when you had left it. Weird. Another thing that was different now, though, was instead of the taunting ‘you fools, i wish you luck trying to hunt me down’ it read, ‘you should know better, love’ in black ink right in the middle of the paper, covering all of the colored words. 

“You know, it’s not right to go through someone else’s things without permission, my love,” you heard Taeyong from behind you as you folded the paper back, holding it close to your chest. There was a small twinge of fear crawling up your chest but there was also another feeling that you couldn’t explain. There was something else that made your stomach flutter. You could only let out the breath you had been holding before turning to face your boyfriend. “I guess, it could be counted as an illegal activity,”

“Taeyo-”

“No, you don’t get to talk. You almost ruined the heist, thank god Mark saw you at the car rental place. We can’t let you ruin what we started, it’s gone too far and we need to finish this once and for all. Now, if you want to leave, I can’t say it won’t hurt but as long as you keep your pretty mouth shut you’ll be fine. Otherwise, I’ll be your nightmare, you know,” Taeyong shrugged as if he wasn’t just threatening your life, more as if he had just told you to wash the dishes or something. 

“I don’t,” you said but quickly shut your mouth trying to think of how to phrase the next sentence you were trying to say in your head, “I don’t want to leave,”

A small flash of something flashed over Taeyong’s eyes, you didn’t know if it was hope or maybe something darker hidden behind his brown eyes. You weren’t paying much attention to what he was wearing, but in the corner of your eye you saw that in his left hand he was holding a black gun with silver letters engraved on the side. A shiver ran down your spine but you couldn’t avoid the small feeling of excitement that bubbled inside of you as Taeyong brought the gun to the middle of your chest, “You saw what I did, why do you still want to stay?” 

“Because,” you swallowed the small lump in your throat as you began to move closer towards Taeyong. The gun still between the both of you, opening your mouth and softly whispering only loud enough for him to hear you, “I love you,”

There was a small pause between the both of you and then Taeyong moved the gun under your chin, the cool metal feeling cold against your skin. The gun’s muzzle dug into your chin as Taeyong tilted your head up so you could meet his dark eyes “Ah, you love me,”

“Taeyo-“

Before you could let out another word you felt Taeyong’s soft lips over yours, there was something else that wasn’t there before last time you kissed him. A small groan slipped past your lips as you pushed Taeyong up to the wall nearest to you, your lips still attached to each other’s. There was a smirk playing on Taeyong’s lips as he pulled back only turn you over, one of his hands grabbing both of yours and pinning them up above your head. With a slight chuckle Taeyong brought the gun back up to your face, the exposed barrel on it stroking your cheek softly, “Ah, my stupid little girl, I love you,” 

“Tae, please listen, I know what you’re doing is not the right thing but I promise you I’m not here to rat you out. I don’t know why you’re doing this but you’re giving money to the poor, you’re helping some people at least so I’m not mad. I just, I wanted the truth,”

“We’ll see.”

  After the talk the both of you shared, Taeyong no longer hid this other part of his life with you. On the contrary, he seemed to be more at peace, leaving his ammunition on the coffee table and many other guns in plain sight over the counter. There was also more of those all black outfits he wore in his closet, but all of them were spotless clean and they even smelled like his after shave. There was a small part of you that wanted to know what he did when he was gone with his friends on his outings, but there was just no way you could ask. Your thoughts were disturbed when a knocking on the door caught you off guard. Sighing you walked towards the door and opened it to find a boy with dark black hair standing there with a slanted smile over his lips.

“Hey, is Taeyong in?” The boy across from you asked as he waved at you and then shoved his hands inside his pockets, you looked at him and then back towards the hallway.

“Yeah, he was just finishing up some work from the newspaper but he is in his office,” you said moving out of the way for the boy in front of you to go down the hallway towards his office. 

“Thanks, by the way, my name is Mark.” 

Your eyes followed the new boy into your house, there was something familiar about the boy walking down the hallway. Thinking back to the previous dates that you and Taeyong shared, you vaguely remembered this Mark boy calling Taeyong in the middle of dinner. Making your way back to your bedroom, you remembered a couple of more people that were in Taeyong’s small friend group. There was a guy with pink hair that reminded you of cherry blossoms, another man who spoke Japanese on the phone while you visited Taeyong in his office. There was also another man who looked a bit older than Taeyong who spoke mandarin on the phone while you were dropping off lunch to Taeyong in his office. All of these guys worked with Taeyong at the newspaper office on a regular basis so you never gave it much thought besides them being his friends.

“Yo, TY,” you heard Mark say as he walked inside Taeyong’s office, you were trying not to eavesdrop on their conversation but his office was right on the other side your bedroom.

Through the wall you heard Taeyong sigh, you could already see him rubbing his temples, “Lee, what are you doing here? I told you not to bring business to my house,”

“Listen dude, I know the boundaries but this new heist we’re pulling needs more planning than what we have so far. This is the biggest one we’re about to do so far and we need to clear out some technical issues that we might have with the program. Kun has been trying to smooth out any bugs and Yuta has been trying to find armory within our sellers in Japan in case of an emergency. Jae has been keeping tabs on all the security around the SM building in case we have to bail and run,” 

“First of all, Mark, we’re not going to bail and run. Second, this has to work out because they have to go down, you know all the mess they made cost the city and everyone who got left behind. Third, after this one we’re moving towns anyways so it doesn’t matter. You, me, Y/N and everybody else so we leave no trace. Remember that we all stick together no matter what.” You could almost picture Taeyong’s frustrated face as he finished his sentence. There was a feeling inside your chest from the end of Taeyong’s speech. Was Taeyong really going to take you with him no matter what? You had already told him that you weren’t going to tell the authorities regardless if you stayed with him or not, but apparently that didn’t matter. 

“You’re taking Y/N? But man, what if she doesn’t want to go. Are we still taking her no matter what?” at the end of this question you heard another emotion in Mark’s words, something along the lines of empathy for you regardless if he knew you or not.

“She knows too much at this point for us to consider it being an option, she’s coming whether she wants to or not.” When Taeyong finished talking, you couldn’t bear to hear any more of what came out of his mouth, there was just no point to it. That wasn’t the boy you started dating yet, regardless, you still loved him. 

  After meeting Mark, the rest of Taeyong’s friends found their way to your house whenever they had a question about a certain topic that could not be named. You quickly learnt their names and faces and what they provided for Taeyong. For example, Yuta was head of armory and he consisted in getting all of the guns and rifles they needed for whatever reason. On the other hand, Mark was kind of all over the place, he was pretty much Taeyong’s assistant. Second in hand if you please. Jaehyun was in charge of investigating all of the places they were taking down one by one, looking at them for weeks on end in order to know all of their patterns so none of the heists would go down hill. Kun, was some sort of a computer genius who dropped out of high school for some unknown reason they wouldn’t tell you why yet. You barely talked to any of the boys, only when they spoke to you first and it was basically for a hello or can I have something out of the fridge? kind of situation. Last but not least there was Taeyong, he was the leader of all these operations and, for some reason, he hated SM with all his heart.

The more you thought of it, you didn’t really know much about Taeyong besides his current status. He never talked about his family like you did. He knew that your mom and dad lived in the country, pretty much living on the farm most of their life. You pretty much broke their heart when you moved to the city to start something new. Sighing, you glanced towards the front door where Taeyong was just walking in with a new laptop under his arm. 

“Hey love,” 

“Hi,” The relationship you both had been a little jagged since you found out about his nightly routines. It wasn’t that you were extremely pissed off, you just wanted to know the truth instead of being hidden in the dark.

“Y/N, I know our relationship has been suffering for the past couple of weeks since you found out about everything, and I’d like to say I’m sorry for that. I never meant to take you into my mess but now that you’re part of it, you’re going to have to run with us,” he stopped talking for a quick second taking, in your reaction and softly sighing when he saw you tense up, “So for the next week you’re going to be training with Yuta on how to hold and shoot a gun properly. I can’t have you not knowing what to do in case of an emergency or if something happens to me in this new heist.”

The thought of Taeyong not coming back to you was one of the scariest things you had ever thought about. There was a feeling of worry at the pit of your stomach that only made you want to puke. Sighing to yourself, you looked back at the man in front of you, nodding at his words. 

“If there is no other choice, I guess I’ll have to do it,” you said as your arms crossed over your chest, meanwhile all Taeyong could do is give you a sigh. 

“I don’t want you to have to look at it from that point of view, I’m only doing what’s better for your safety,” he replied to you, dropping his keys in the small bowl in the coffee table in front of you. 

You could only roll your eyes at his words as he sat down next to you on the couch. Keeping your eyes focused on the tv as you spoke, “Well, if you were not doing all of this we wouldn’t have to be there in the first place,”

From the corner of your eyes you saw Taeyong clench his jaw shut, his lips turning into a thin line before he talking to you once again, “You have no idea all the pain that they’ve cost me, it was only a matter of time before somebody did something about all of their crimes. Only somehow I ended up being the first one to man up and do something about it.”

“Then explain to me, what did they do so bad that you have to do all these things including killing people?” 

“I didn’t kill anyone, I have just hurt them a little or...” Taeyong only struggled when you finish the sentence. It only reminded you of one of the previous conversations you’ve  both shared, much like when he first told you when you found out.

“That’s not the point Taeyong, all I want to know is why you’re doing all of this? Why are you getting your hands bloodied in this mess?”

“Because it cost me everything that my family had, for the same reason that my sister passed away three years ago due to the fact that I could not provide enough money to keep her alive. The fact that my dad lost his business when he decided to join in partnership with SM and them stealing from right under his nose without him knowing. All of that and we were not the only family that they’ve done this to. With Jaehyun, his mom passed away five years ago to some cancer from working at the factory SM ran in their town. Yuta had to travel all the way here to hunt them down when they destroyed his town when some chemicals leaked into the water system. All of us have something we want justice for, this is not for nothing.” With that, Taeyong walked away from you and towards the bedroom not saying another word to you or even sparing you a second glance.

  After this new argument you had with Taeyong, you couldn’t help but to feel guilty about everything he had just said to you. The truth is, you wanted to know everything but so far you knew enough to know where he was coming from. You knew Taeyong was not the hard, stone cold person he appeared to be, he was soft and very sentimental inside. That was the man that you had fallen in love with and still loved regardless of his actions now. 

Walking from the living room back to the kitchen, your eyes widened at the figure standing in front of your fridge. There was Mark, rummaging through the fridge looking for something to eat. “Jesus, Mark, could you at least make yourself noticeable when you’re in the house?”

“Well, I heard you and Taeyong arguing again and I didn’t want to disturb you two in the middle of it. I didn’t want to be that person,” Mark said as he took a bite of the apple in his left hand. Shrugging, he walked over towards you and jumped up to sit on the counter, looking back at you as he leaned his head back on the cabinets behind his head. “Listen, I know it’s none of my business but you should really cut the guy some slack. He’s not a bad person, it's just the way his whole life changed from one day to the next that made him the way he is. You probably don’t believe me but I’ve known him for a while now, I used to live next-door to him and his sister used to babysit me. I know way more than I should probably know about him and it’s not my place to tell you what happened but he is kind of traumatized,”

With your shoulders slumped, you sighed as Mark finished his sentence. After all Taeyong had just told you part of the reason why he was doing these things. The only thing is, you wanted to know the whole thing not just part and you needed Taeyong to tell that to you, “I just want the truth Mark, I don’t want anymore secrets. If I’m in this for a while now, I want to know everything. I don’t want anything to be hidden from me anymore,”

“He didn’t tell you the details yet but he told you the most important stuff and that’s all you need to know. At this point, the less you know the better, trust me, he’s doing it for your own safety.” With that, Mark jumped off the counter and walked down the hallway towards Taeyong’s office, closing the door after him. 

  Walking back towards your shared bedroom with Taeyong, you found him going over some papers in his lap, his glasses riding on the bridge of his nose as he glanced over towards you. He said nothing but went back to the piles of papers scattered on the bed, there were different sticky notes on each pile and you couldn’t help but smile. “Give me a few minutes to get this sorted and then we can go to bed,”

“That’s fine, but uh, I actually wanted to apologize,” you said after letting out an awkward cough from the back of your throat. Taeyong’s eyes flew up to meet yours, there was a small twinkle you had almost forgotten was there, “Mark said some stuff to me and I know he’s right, I just don’t like to admit things to myself sometimes and I’m sorry,”

A small sigh slipped past his lips as he set down the papers in his hands, getting up from the bed and walking over towards you. His hands found their way to their spot on your hips as you leaned more into him unconsciously, “My love, as much as you frustrate me to the point where I want to put a gun up to your chest, again, I’d rather die than to be here without you. I know you want to know many things about this but I also don’t want to put you in danger due to your knowledge,”

“I know that, but I also want you to know whenever you finally want to talk about it, that I'm here with my ears wide open to listen,” you nodded as you finished your sentence, glancing back up to the man in front of you.

A small smile spread over Taeyong’s lips as he nodded along with you, his hands moving from the spot on your hips to hold your face in his hands. His fingers moving over your cheeks as he leaned in to press a soft kiss to your lips before speaking again, “Do you know how much I love you?”

“I might need a refresher actually,” you answered while your own lips tugged into a smile, moving your hands around his neck. It had been a bit too long since you and Taeyong had shared a moment like this but suddenly the feeling hit you, this was home. He was your home. 

“I love you.”

“I love you more.” 

  After a long training session with Yuta, you let yourself flop down on the couch next to Taeyong who was busy typing away on the keyboard in front of him. Jaehyun and Kun were busy in Taeyong’s office trying to contact some server in Russia to avoid leaving any traces behind on this new heist. There were plenty of guns laid out on the dining table and by now, you knew how to disassemble each and every single one of them and put them back together. Being part of this was not too bad but the work on your body was exhausting, Taeyong told you to quit your job due to the fact that all of you were leaving after this was over which was exactly what you did. Taeyong’s hand reached over to yours, your palm was now covered in calluses which made him frown and traced over the harsh marks on your soft skin. 

“New ones?”

Shaking your head, you could only turn to look at him, hair sticking to your forehead from the sweat, “I don’t think so, the old ones just burst when Yuta went to train me over hidden knives and gu-”

“Jesus, Yuta! I told you basics for crying out loud, not the entire thing. At least not yet, couldn’t you have waited until we were out of here?” Groaning, Taeyong let his laptop fall shut and he walked over towards the dining room where Yuta was cleaning out the nuzzle in one of the rifles. “What the hell happened to basics?”

You could only picture Yuta rolling his eyes at Taeyong as you followed behind, “A hidden knife could be the difference between her being alive or dead in a matter of seconds TY,” There was something else in Taeyong’s eyes when he starred directly at the man sitting down in front of him, “Plus, you need to chill. You’ve been a pain in everyone’s ass lately, we know what we’re doing remember?” 

By the end of Yuta’s sentence you only wanted to sigh but instead you took Taeyong’s hand, you lead him back to your bedroom. Giving him a small smile as he sat down on the mattress in the middle of the floor. There were boxes surrounding the both of you from the move but you couldn’t bring yourself to care enough to continue packing the remaining of your belongings while Taeyong was like this. Clothes were still in your closet and there was plenty of books scattered on the floor that went from computer science to kamasutra positions. That was a book which you were shy to show to Taeyong when the both of you started getting too comfortable in the routine. A blush covered you cheeks at the memory of it but your thoughts were soon broken apart by Taeyong who was tugging on your shirt. 

“Have I really been an asshole lately?” he asked in a small voice as he looked up at you, this look on him always reminded you of a baby kitten which only made your insides melt.

“A little, but we all know you’re on the edge lately so we let it slide.” you replied as you sat down next to him, taking his hand in yours and giving it a small squeeze. You knew it wasn’t much but he needed the reassurance in every way possible and you were there to give it to him even if you didn’t think it was such a good idea.

“It’ll all be over soon, just think of it that way.” The way he said it only made the hairs on your arms stand up and your insides feel like they were being turned inside out, but you could only nod and put on a brave face. 

  You had never seen Taeyong get himself ready for one of his missions but seeing him turn from your adorable boyfriend to this emotionless human was something you would never forget. As he traded in his usual skinny jeans for some pants that looked as if they were a mix between sweatpants and cargo pants you noticed the twinkle in his eyes start to shut down. There was no sign of remorse in his eyes and the thought of Taeyong being this person scared you a little bit, not that you would ever tell anyone but that made you aware of every single move he made. There were knives and guns hidden throughout his body in case of any emergencies, while he was still going to be carrying a gun on each of his hands. The long black trench coat you had seen before was on his shoulders once again and this time there was a black turtleneck sweater that covered his torso up to his neck. There was also a skin tight bullet proof vest underneath but it was barely visible under the sweater. His black dress shoes were traded in for black military boots as he walked towards you, handing you your own black outfit. There was something in his eyes when his eyes met yours that reminded you of the old Taeyong but that was quickly gone as he turned to look at the rest of the guys who were already dressed in black. You could only nod as you let them talk, Taeyong giving them a brief pep talk to lead them into this. Biting down on your lip, you walked out of the office and towards your now empty room to change. 

The outfit Taeyong had given you was nothing out of the ordinary, black cargo sweatpants like his, a black tshirt, the vest that was meant to go under your shirt, and a black bomber that was similar to Mark’s. Getting dressed was the easy part but as you tied the military boots you realized how this was about to go down, you were about to go rob a fucking company for crying out loud. Looking back at the mirror, you grabbed your matching face mask and turned towards Taeyong who was standing in the door, no face mask but instead a black bandana covering half of his face. 

“I never thought you’d look this good in this outfit,” he let out a small chuckle as he took your hand, bringing it up to his face and giving it a kiss through the cloth. “Ready to go, princess?” 

Making your way down to the middle of town and through the streets that you used to call home, you were now sealing your ticket deal out of there with no chance of return. You took a look at the people around you, Taeyong who was on the driver’s seat with Mark on his right talking to him about some new video game he had found. Kun and Jaehyun were talking about the security on the bank while Yuta was putting ammo into the guns they were bringing in. Sighing to yourself, you looked down at your hands and thought about everything that was about to happen. 

“Remember, you are only to come out of the van in case of emergencies but there will be none. Is that understood?” Taeyong said as he sat right in front of you as you tied your shoe laces on the combat boots on your feet. “You are to have a gun and a knife on you at all times, even when we walk out of this place. You are to wear the chip in your ear for us to make contact if we get separated and for either of us to know your location,”

“Tae, I got it, don’t worry. We’ll be fine,”

“You don’t get it, you’re everything I need and I’m putting you on the line here. Honestly, I’d be nothing without you and I can’t lose you,”

The memory floated on your mind as the car parked about two blocks away from the bank, Taeyong turning to look at all of you while he pulled the bandana back over his face. All of them nodded to each other before Taeyong turned to look at you, there was a soft look in his eyes as he pointed to his mask telling you to put yours on. After the cloth was over your face Taeyong, Mark, Jaehyun, and Yuta made their way outside. They all walked different ways while Jaehyun ran towards the nearest building climbing up the escape stairs and up towards the roof. Kun stayed back with you in order to use the computer to retrieve all the wired money.

“Don’t worry, they’ll be fine.” Kun said as you looked through the window at the man walking away from you. You could only nod as Taeyong walked towards the building, his mask covering half of his face but the scar at the corner of his eye was there. His hands were tucked inside the pockets of his coat, he looked powerful as he took long strides into the building. 

It must have been at least ten minutes before you heard two gunshots making the hair on your arms stand up. Your eyes could only look between Kun and the building where the rest of the boys were. There was a beeping on one of the many screens and Kun quickly pressed the bluetooth in his ear, “Jaehyun! Listen, you can’t just ru- no, get Yuta to help! Taeyong said she was not to get involved!” as the last words came out of Kun’s mouth you were already getting out of the van, only for his hand to reach back to you. “Goddammit Y/N, you can’t go,”

“Kun, let me go, I can help!” you tugged your arm back from his grip only to see him groan and let you go. His hand pushing his hair back from his face and shaking his head, a sigh escaping his lips as he turned towards the screen. 

“Listen, go help them get Mark out and I’ll pull up the van in the front. Most of the money is already wired anyways.” 

  Nodding, you took off running towards the building, the cool breeze felt refreshing against your clothed skin. There was an adrenaline rush entering your bloodstream as you made your way up the steps, fixing your hair before pulling the door open. There were two police men holding guns towards Taeyong who was in front of a wounded Mark who was holding his side, a pool of red was starting to spread under him. Oh fuck. Everyone’s eyes were suddenly on you as your feet kicked some glass away from your path. Taeyong’s eyes narrowed at you making you only nod as your hands glided along your sides pulling out two of the many hidden knives on you. 

The only thing you could think of was of how Yuta had taught you to throw weeks prior to this. Your eyes focused on the two men in blue who stood in front of you before the knives made their way out of your grip. They landed on the strip of skin visible between their ironed shirts and their chin as small drops of dark red blood slowly dribbled out, soon becoming a steady stream of red liquid. Your eyes flickered between Taeyong and the gasping men in front of him that reached for him with bloody hands. Panic settled at the pit of your stomach as you realized what you had done, your hands were soon trying to take off the mask that seemed to take away the oxygen from your lungs.

“Yong!” you heard Yuta’s voice from somewhere behind you. Soon enough Taeyong was in front of you, pushing your hands away from your face and fixing the mask back. Your eyes went from Taeyong’s form in front of you to where Jaehyun was getting Mark up with the help of Yuta, leaving a trail of red as they walked towards the doors. It had only been a couple of seconds but you could hear the police sirens starting to near, that was when you felt a tug on your arm.

“Listen darling, I love you but, we gotta go. Now.” 

Time felt like as if it were dragging as you slowly walked with Taeyong towards the doors, as you started shaking your head trying to get out of the daze you were still in. Taeyong’s hand was in yours and giving it a comforting squeeze, meanwhile you walked a bit faster to keep up with him as the both of you made it out. Jaehyun and Yuta were now getting into the van as various police cars started pulling up closer to the building. Taeyong pressed the small bluetooth chip in his ear and started speaking as bright red lights started getting closer, “You guys have to go, get Mark patched up. Me and Y/N will find a way to meet you guys, just go.” 

From the small chip in your ear you heard Jaehyun scoffing, “As if, run. We can still get away,” Taeyong shook his head and flicked his finger towards the nearest empty street, you could barely see but Kun only nodded and started driving off. There was more arguing from the bluetooth but you knew Kun wasn’t going to stop, “Fuck Taeyong, you better keep yourself alive.”

The next thing you saw was Taeyong pulling out the small device and stepping on it, you copied his actions and did the same with yours. The police was now less than fifty feet away from the both of you which is when he finally turned to you, “We gotta run, see that silver car? You are to get in as soon as I get it unlocked,”

“Got it.” The both of you ran as shouts from the police started coming in, you could only swallow the lump in your throat as your legs moved the fastest they had in awhile. Taeyong was a couple of steps in front of you, his hand digging inside his pockets and finally pulling out his favorite gun. As Taeyong stopped at the driver’s side of the car, the butt of the gun met the window, shattering the glass in many little pieces. His hand went to unlock the doors which only made you get in as soon as you could only, this was when bullets started making sounds against the metal. 

“Fuck.” You heard Taeyong mutter as he started working on some cables from under the steering wheel. Peaking your head back towards the window, your eyes locked on a few officers that were slowly moving around the car with their guns aimed at the both of you. 

“Tae, you gotta move a little faster please,” you whispered as you grabbed one of the guns that was strapped against your thigh, biting down on your lip as your fingers found their way towards the hammer. Tugging on it back before you made yourself aim towards the people coming towards you. The police were less than ten feet away, crowding around the car as the engine finally roared to life. A shaky breath escaping from your lips as relief washed over you, turning to look at Taeyong who was busy driving away from the scene. “Oh, thank god.”

“As long as you got me, we’ll find a way out.” Taeyong said as he reached over to take your hand in his. His hand was a little rough from earlier and there was blood caked under his nails but you didn’t seem to care anymore. You were part of his world and you had to learn to accept it. Though there was still a nagging feeling eating you alive, but you chose not to pay attention to that. 

  The both of you had been on the road for two hours, the radio kept going in and out about the robbery. Of course, the police were still trying to locate the car the both of you were escaping in so there was still something to worry about. Rubbing your eyes, you could only sigh and look out the window, but your eyebrows soon furrowed when you turned into an apartment complex you hadn’t recognized. Looking around, you tried to locate yourself before turning to Taeyong who was pulling up the mask once again to cover his face.

“Stay here, look at that window on the corner. When you see me turn on the light you can come in,” he stated as he pulled the silencer on his gun and carefully put it on the barrel. You could only nod as the gun was put back into his coat and he made his way out of the car, walking up the stairs into the second floor. A couple of minutes passed by before there was a small bang that sounded barely audible from where you were and then a few seconds later the light was turned on. You brought your hand to your hair, pulling off the hair tie and letting your hair fall down your shoulders as if to cover your face as you walked into the night sky. 

Your feet moved one in front of the other as you made your way up the stairs and into the apartment whose door was slightly opened. Walking inside, you took a look at your surroundings, taking notice of the papers that were scattered on the floor, reminding you of how you and Taeyong would sit down and organize the ones back home. A few shells from bullets were laying on top of the white sheets of paper and a streak of red was now leading from the living room towards the bathroom. Taeyong walked out of the bathroom with a few dots of red covering the side of his face, his bandana hung around his neck as he approached you. In one hand, he was holding a box of home hair dye and in the other was his gun with specks of blood on the silencer drying down. “How good are you with hair dye?” 

  It had only been a couple of hours, Taeyong’s head resting on your lap while he slept and you kept a look out until midnight. His bright red hair stood out against his black outfit that had multiple darker spots that you knew were not hair dye. In the pit of your stomach, you still felt a little weird about the whole situation, but now you prefered to know less. It had been your first time and somehow you ended up with a body count that only floated in the back of your mind when everything was silent. 

“So now what?” you asked Taeyong as you flopped down on the couch across from him as he walked behind you, a towel in his hair as he dried it down. The towel stained in a bright red that you didn’t know if it was blood or if it was dye. 

“We rest, we take off at midnight. We should be able to arrive at the safe house in the morning where the rest of the guys should be waiting for us,” Taeyong replied as he sat down next to you.

Sighing, you turned and grabbed the towel from his hands, helping him dry off his wet hair, “And then? Are we just going to start over?” 

“I mean, I guess we can, we could keep running this for the rest of our lives. We’re pretty much invencible,” there was a small chuckle that followed his comment as he finished. There was also a small glimmer in the corner of his eye that you caught and it only made the pit in your stomach grow. “Then again, we could find jobs and play nice,”

“You like this don’t you?”

“Y/N, that’s n-”

“But it is Yong, you like this life. I can see it and I’m sure the guys saw it too, I’ve never seen you so passionate about another project in your life since this. Yeah, it’s terrifying but I’m going to be there with you all the way.”

The memory of the earlier moment had you still a bit shaken up, you had pretty much signed a deal to be with him ride or die. Swallowing the lump in your throat, you looked down at the man in your lap, if you wanted to end this you could. You were still carrying the rest of your weapons on your body and you were fairly certain on how each of them were supposed to be used. The idea of ending it all here and turning everybody in felt foreign to your mind but it still kept floating around. 

You were busy looking outside the window when you heard the door knob start to jiggle, the boy on your lap quickly getting up from his position. Furrowing your eyebrows, you looked at Taeyong who had a smirk on his lips, his expression changed the moment he turned to you and looked down the hallway. He pointed towards the last door before the bathroom, you could only nod as he picked up the gun from the floor and made his way behind the front door. You moved inside the empty bedroom and looked around, there was an array of photos on the walls along with awards on one of the bookshelves. To OH SEHUN, from SM ENT. one of the awards read as you glanced through the bookshelf. 

The photos showed three men, two of them were obviously younger which only made you assume they were investors of this SM ENT. Your hand reached out to grab one of the photos that was on the wall, there was a third guy who seemed shorter than either of them. The sound of footsteps caught you off guard as you quickly pulled your hand back and ignored the photo behind you. 

“Taeyong, dude, we can talk about it seriously,” the stranger pleaded as he walked back towards the bathroom. You leaned to peek between the door and the wall, the gun was aimed at the stranger’s head as he slowly backed up into the sink. There was something familiar about this guy that you couldn't help but notice, “C’mon, put that down, we can talk,”

“There’s nothing to talk about, you and Chanyeol ran with my idea and then pretended it was yours just to make money off of it. You knew I need that money more than you and your rich family, and because of you she’s dead!” Taeyong exclaimed as he pushed the taller man towards the tub, the mirror reflecting the side of his face, giving you a clear sight of Taeyong.

The taller man was taken aback by Taeyong’s words that he hadn’t even noticed the other man who was already in the tub, his body already cold. “Wait, no Bokyoung can’t be dead. Taeyong, stop playing, you can’t be serious!”

“You killed her, Sehun.” The voice that came out of Taeyong was emotionless and it sort of reminded you of a robot as he pulled on the hammer of the gun, his aim never leaving the man in front of him.

“Taeyong, I had no idea, please.” The taller man was pretty much begging at this point and from what you could see there was no way Taeyong was going to let him go. 

Bringing the gun up to the stranger’s forehead, Taeyong tilted his head to the side as he spoke, “Thank god that you won’t see her where you’re going.”

“Taey-” whatever the man was going to say was cut short with a silent bang that rang through your ears as your eyes looked through the mirror back at Taeyong. The smirk that appeared earlier was now plastered across his face once again. A cold chill made its way down your back as you moved away from the door, backing away until your body knocked into the bookshelf. Turning your head to the side, you looked at the picture once again, the men who were now laying in the bathtub were in that picture along with Taeyong.

  “Who were they?” you asked Taeyong as you got into the newest car which was kind of taken from the two dead men in the tub. Is not like they’re going to ask for it back, you mentally thought to yourself as you looked over at the man next to you who was pulling out of the parking lot.

“They were nobody’s until I came along with all the brains,” he replied in a cold tone as his fingers tightened around the wheel. His knuckles almost turning a pinky white before he sighed and turned to look at you for a brief second. “They were the reason Bokyoung died, I was on the team with them and we were supposed to turn in our idea for a multi wall protection with zero traceable coding behind. The day of the presentation, I was let go by SM, they told me they didn’t need my ideas anymore. Of course, I was upset but then from one of the leaders, I found out they had picked Chanyeol and Sehun’s idea. My idea. I tried to reach all of them but I got no replies, no answers so I decided to wait.” 

Taeyong only shrugged as he finished his sentence and relaxed back against the chair, his hand reaching over to take yours in his. “How long have you been keeping tabs on them?”

“Ever since I went to my bowling outings, Kun is a lot more into this than me. He was the one who taught me how to trace them without leaving a sign behind. To hack into CCTV’s to see where they’d be going, track cell phone records, all of those things.” His hand felt warm against yours as you stared at the road ahead of you, his thumb tracing soothing circles over your knuckles. Nodding, you decided against asking more questions about the situation, it was obvious Taeyong had eyes and ears everywhere. In the back of your mind, you could only think of what would’ve happened if you had stayed behind, your every move would’ve been watched by him no doubt. 

Moonlight came through the sunroof, shining over the rings across Taeyong’s fingers as his fingers laced into yours. At this point, the clock on the dashboard read 3:15 am and you were coming in and out of consciousness, sleep finally taking its toll on you. There was a feeling of protection when Taeyong did small things like hold your hand that made your heart skip a beat. Closing your eyes, you finally let sleep wash over you, Taeyong’s distant humming lulling you to sleep.

  It had been less than an hour before you felt Taeyong shake your leg, making you groan as your eyes once again adjusted to the darkness. There was a sound of sirens in the background that reminded you of white noise, but sleep was still heavy on you and you weren’t fully functional yet. “Baby, c’mon you gotta wake up,” Taeyong’s voice was a bit strained as he kept one of his hands on the wheel while the other kept shaking your leg to wake you up. 

“What’s going on?” you groaned out as your hands stretched over your head, blinking a few times before turning to him. There was a serious look on his face as his eyes shifted between the mirrors and the road in front of him. 

“We might have a little company.” He said as he reached over and pulled out his gun, setting it on your lap. Your breath hitched, knowing what he was asking, you could only nod as you began to reload the magazine. 

“Fuck.”

Beginning to slowly sit up, the sunroof above the both of you slowly opened up, revealing the twinkling stars above the both of you. Your body fit smoothly between the small rectangle and you could see that behind you there were about three police cars chasing the car. “Stop the car!” one of the speakers from the cars boomed through the night. Adrenaline rushed through your body as your body turned to face the incoming cop cars behind you. Bringing the gun up, your hand pulled the hammer on the top, aiming at the police car and quickly shooting four bullets out. A loud boom and a hiss from the car coming to a halt suddenly was heard through the empty highway. The police car behind the both of you screeched and stopped, covering the road and the other cars stop behind it abruptly. 

As soon as they stopped, officers ran out of their cars, shooting various bullets your way and making Taeyong yank your leg down. It was barely enough time as bullets buzzed over the roof of the car. Meanwhile Taeyong could only press on the gas, the needle on the dashboard hitting close to a hundred as you both escaped the scene. “That’s my girl!” 

There was a grin on your lips as you leaned over to press a kiss down to his cheek, fixing yourself back into your seat, “That was kind of exciting.” Your eyes turned to look back at Taeyong who had a smile plastered on his lips. 

As you reached for his hand, you noticed Taeyong’s smile fade into a blank face and you could only look at him in confusion. That was until you looked ahead, there was about a dozen police cars surrounding the car and there was no way to drive out of. 

“Lee Taeyong! Y/L/N Y/N! Come out with your hands up!”

Your eyes looked back at Taeyong who stopped the car about twenty feet from the other cars, his breathing was calmed as he turned to look at you, “You know I love you, right? That you’re the best thing that could’ve happened to me in my twenty four years of living in this miserable Earth. That you’re the love of my life and I’m just sorry I couldn’t give you a better life, a life outside of this and I’m so sorry I dragged you into this,”

“Lee Taeyong, I could’ve left you back there at that stupid building to die yet I killed two people for you. If that doesn’t show how devoted I am to you then what does?” There was a brief moment where he could only chuckle and stare at you. The police was still screaming from outside the car, but at that moment it was just you and him, nothing else. 

“You trust me, correct?”

“With my life.” 

That was all he needed to know, within seconds the car was picking up speed as it reached the people and cars in front of you. The car colliding with everything in its path, Taeyong’s hand in yours as your world turned into utter darkness.