as a certified Diagnosed Autist(TM) i cannot stress enough that i am not only pro- self-diagnosis, but also pretty anti- legal medical diagnosis. it is, at best, a cruel hoop we have to jump through so privileged people will deign to give us what we need. don't fucking do that shit unless you have to, it was disgustingly expensive, fucking humiliating, infantilizing, and dehumanizing, and would probably actively cause problems in my life if i didn't have some really good allistic (-passing) people in my corner and also wasn't so fucking disabled that it mostly doesn't matter.
literally get that diagnosis if you need it for job/school accessibility shit or SSI or whatever, and otherwise dont tell the government SHIT about yourself. there is zero good reason for them to want that information. that's between you and the people you want in your life.
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dear brain, you are not going to describe things as well as other writers do. you're just not. describing is not your strong suit and you know this. no two writing styles are the same and you have GOT tO STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP ABOUT NOT BEING ABLE TO DESCRIBE THINGS WELL because then nothing gets written and that's why you haven't put out a goddamn thing since fucking September OHMYGOD just write and have fun what IS WRONG WITH YOUUUUUUU
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my bday is monday and i originally had a bunch of stuff planned for it, but now i need to get the AC recharged before summer really sets in so so much for that. ah well as least it’s not a hospital trip this year.
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everyone talks about parasocial relationships by talking about how youtubers dont know you and podcasters arent your friends and its creepy and wrong to feel warmly towards them and youre hurting them when you do that
but nobody wants to talk about MY parasocial relationship with IAMPETH certified Master Penman Harvest Crittenden
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anyways as much as i get super shitty patrons sometimes my coworker and i were discussing on our ten the really lovely patrons you can get bc they remind you of the good in the world. like for example i mentioned the guy a few weeks ago who spent all of interval talking to me about the netherlands and my coworker found that super sweet because that guy probably had no idea how much that topic meant to me but like,, all he did was talk about the netherlands and all in all he was lovely to me and sometimes you need genuinely nice people with no ulterior motives and it was super calming to not have a patron scream at me or wave something in my face or treat me like i don’t know the show and the latecomer points inside out. he just listened to me. because one thing about front of house is that every thing i say often has a purpose and its really annoying when i tell people stuff and they ignore me. and no matter what it is, its beautiful when people just… actually pay attention to my words. and they actually are just a decent human being who makes me feel a little more human.
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not to get too real on this here *checks notes* personal private tumblr blog. but i'm genuinely terrified about the next thursday shift i have to work. with a full staff roster it's already hell on earth but my favorite coworker leaves next monday and another's looking for work elsewhere. and i have probable eds. and other undiagnosed health issues. that make it generally Unwise to stand on my feet for *checks notes again* ten hours in a day. so IMAGINE HOW IT WILL FEEL. WHEN [REDACTED] RESIGNS. AND THOSE TEN HOURS BECOME *checks notes again again* FIFTEEN. I'VE BEEN HERE TWO WEEKS
kitten rush is how i will die
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Please join me in a moment of pure shock that my mini boss jumped in and started helping me with a task and decide oh hell nah this is boring AF I’m getting you actual help next week you shouldn’t be doing this by yourself. On top of on Tuesday her coming in seeing the people who were here on Monday didn’t do anything and essentially bringing the hammer down so I wouldn’t have to do it all by myself. Which I think included pushing back to our main boss to make our boss do their job and flat out tell everyone how many hours they’re supposed to be helping me with said task.
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