#we react and cope in different ways

[maxiewolfe]

the worst thing to me about how the triad ended this season is that we basically got back to their starting point, there's no growth for audrey or aki at all, they say stuff and then don't do them, so it is exactly as max says they just want sex which is the usual trope for polyamorous relationships in media and I'm so tireddddd like I really wanted to see audrey and aki do something to keep the relationship together, we see aud all the episode thinking about their relationship, like yeah I dont want to lose max but I also dont want to lose Aki, JC telling her to take some time was supposed to work towards her saying I want both of them I can make this work I'm in, instead we never see her realize anything more than she's okay with max leaving in terms of not making an actual effort to make him stay... this was awful, not even emotional enough for me, I wanted to see audrey and aki actually showing emotions!!! thomas as always served with his acting, and we have once again max crying exposing his feelings and being fucking honest and audrey and aki just watching him, godddd I'm so disappointed lmao

[ulgapodatkowa]

you know what I find interesting about stede's fight with zheng in the bar? it mirrors the fight stede had with izzy in the first season. in the way that stede is standing in izzy's place, he harbours the same feelings.

before the fight we see izzy approach stede and try to console him. he's saying that he understands how stede feels after ed left again, he says that he knows that ed is a complicated man. they sure as hell cope with their 'ed situations' differently but on the fundamental level it's the same type of being brokenhearted.

and then zheng does the same thing that stede did to izzy: she takes his crew, family. and stede reacts in the same way, he challenges her to a duel.

during the fight we see that the camera pans to izzy a few times and we see his thoughts. that it's a bad idea, that it's futile. but we are also left with a notion that this is what has to happen - stede has to lose in order to realize where he's been wrong and accept it later on. izzy knows that and despite the fact that he could step in he doesn't. but he stays at stede's side when the crew sides with zheng. he fucking stays.

[jaythes1mp]

Do you think readers' lives would be different if they were a deer hybrid?

Fun Fact: Did you know that cervids (from the deer, deer and elk family) are considered extremely sensitive animals. When suffering severe stress, such as when captured or rescued, for example, the animal's reaction can cause what is called 'capture myopathy' ', which compromises the organism of these animals.

I do, actually. Because, another fun fact! In June of this year me and my roommate saved a baby deer who was laying next to her mums dead body (she was less than 48 hours old). Fortunately she wasn’t injured. We were extremely lucky to be living next to a wildlife specialist, our neighbour, who’s been looking after Astrid and will continue to until she’s old enough to be relocated. Thankfully this wasn’t the first deer that’s been brought to her. So unfortunately I'm very acquainted with that fact.

She’s still striving strong though! These were the first pics taken of her.

Anyway, how they’d react:

Batfam x deer hybrid reader

With Damian's exceptionally caring nature when it comes to animals, he has already meticulously planned out the perfect environment for your deer forms comfort. He has considered every possible scenario and tailored everything to ensure your contentment as well as a space to meet all of your needs.

The young Wayne would thoughtfully strategize and visualise your reactions to every minor action or stimulus. He would carefully consider the most appropriate responses and adapt his behaviour to ensure a positive and nurturing environment for you. Even if the environment in question was one that you were forced into.

The bats would handle your transformed state with great caution, disregarding if your human mind was in control when you were transformed or not. Given your affiliation with the Cervidae family in your animal form, the Wayne family would be especially mindful and considerate of your natural tendencies, behaviours, and instincts.

Despite Dick's intelligence and expertise as a vigilante, being second only to Bruce Wayne himself, his impatience would become apparent within the twenty-ninth attempt to approach you for some affectionate ‘big brother cuddles’. Assuming you’re an adult or older teen, you would be extremely skittish and resistant in your deer form to his advances and attempts to get close, if not completely avoid his presence altogether, let alone let him cling to you for a ‘snuggle.’

Jason wouldn’t comprehend why you’d consistently conceal yourself, in both forms, hiding behind the couch every time he arrives, or why you involuntarily freeze at the sound of his motorcycle, or even why you instinctively flee at the slightest hint of him standing or making a move. But despite his confusion, he doesn't hold it against you. He’s witnessed the horrific experiences and trauma the children of Gotham City are subjected to, and if hiding and evading is the way you cope with what you’re going through, then he’s willing to wait patiently for you to feel secure in his presence. As your sibling, he vowed never to give you a reason to fear him. He knows just how overwhelming it is in this new environment, and he’s not planning on giving you any more reasons to be frightened by them.

Tim would find it easier to deal with your distressed nature than the others, opting to monitor you through the security cameras, allowing him to work on his cases simultaneously, rather than being overly affectionate with you. This way, he could keep a watchful eye on you without having to directly interact, which allows him to multi-task and focus on both keeping you safe and solving his cases.

Despite Jason and Dick no longer living in the Manor, Bruce would likely be the one to spend the least time with you. However, he's not neglecting you. He makes a conscious effort to rearrange his busy schedule, keeps certain days free every week, and meticulously plans time for some quality family bonding. Even if the quality time in question only consists of him quietly sitting in your vicinity, sipping on some freshly made tea while reading the newspaper, he cherishes every moment that he gets to share with you. Simply being near you is enough. Because you're his child, and he's not planning on fucking that up ever again.

[dalliancekay]

Aziraphale does NOT need to suffer MORE

Can't believe I have to say this. TW: grief, mourning, death (sorry) I have, since falling into the fandom 6 months ago to escape real life, seen many takes on how Aziraphale needs to suffer in S3 to match Crowley's suffering. Mainly as the counterpart to the moment Crowley thinks he lost Aziraphale as he's looking for him desperately in the burning bookshop....

...after this he drinks, we suppose, to dull his pain, waiting for the Armageddon. Also, for the way Crowley suffers at the bandstand argument, the 'I Forgive You' moments, which many people find utterly devastating and incredibly heartless from Aziraphale. Not to mention when he doesn't react in the 'right way' to Crowley's confession in the Final 15. And then on top of that, 'abandons' Crowley. For Heaven. Oh and also for, and I quote: "The smug and entitled way Aziraphale went around in S2 assuming Crowley would love and follow him everywhere." And so for all this pain that Crowley endured for him, Aziraphale should suffer in S3 (to I assume) even out the scores. Some people want to see him lose it, show his emotions, to cry or beg or otherwise show how much he misses Crowley and how very sorry he is for what he has (so thoughtlessly) done.

Now for the TW grief content I motioned above. You can skip to the next sentence in bold.

I was on holiday late September last year, visiting my mum, stepfather and my two younger brothers. We went to a cousin's wedding. It was great. The day after, as I was hanging out reading a book, my mum got a call. The kind of call every mother fears. My youngest brother (he was 27) died in an accident. We needed to speak to police and the coroner. She cried and cried. She's still crying. She asks questions. She gets no answers. I...did not cry. I talked to the police. I googled a funeral home. I bought my brother his last set of clothes. He lived in a hoodie and torn black jeans. Mum wanted a suit. But he died in the one he bought for the wedding. I texted a lot of people. I bought snacks for the many friends who came to the funeral and wanted to speak to us after. My grief feels like a vice. I am not sad. I do not appear sad. Contrary to what people expect. But I am ANGRY. I am furious. But nobody can see this. I am not fine and I wish no one would ever* ask how I was again. TW/Personal content over. WE ALL SUFFER DIFFERENTLY Since I was small (because I am weird like that) I genuinely wondered if, finding myself in danger, I could scream like people in films do. I don't think I could. I cope with hard situations, fear and stress and anxiety by shutting down, sometimes by retreating as well, and by furiously (but quietly) trying to find a way out. And I think Aziraphale does the same. And that's why I love him so much. And why I feel I get him and understand that people sometimes can't tell how much he's actually feeling. I also express love the way Aziraphale does - by organising things for people, inviting them places, making plans. When Crowley said you call me for three things (and it's basically any old reason) I felt SO SEEN. This is what I would do with a friend who I know is feeling unmoored, sad, stuck (Crowley's 'What's the point of it all' at the beginning of S2). I'd text them with any old thing. I'd never actually say I love you, but I would try to get them to talk, meet me, go somewhere. Aziraphale does not express emotions the same way as Crowley.

But his emotions are valid nonetheless. He is worried for Crowley from around 3 minutes into their acquaintanceship. And he NEVER stops worrying from then on.

And are we quite sure he has never lost Crowley?

How many times did Aziraphale's heart freeze in horror when he realised Hell has taken Crowley and he had no idea if he'll ever come back and what is happening to him?

How did Aziraphale spend the night after vanquishing the demons and starting a war? He had no idea where Crowley was. What happened to him. He was probably sick with worry that Hell just took him away. We didn't see him drink and cry, but surely, the worry must have been overwhelming. The wait for what will happen.

ALL his worries over the Arrangement. Was he worried for himself? Do we really think that?

Crowley thought he lost Aziraphale in S1, yes, we saw that. And what happened to the angel then?

He got blown into atoms which I bet wasn't pleasant and when he arrives in Heaven he limps. Why is he hurt? And why is he quickly pretending he isn't? Why is he always hiding how he feels? Also, he immediately deserts, wants no part in the Holy War and quickly finds an extremely unconventional way to get back. It's not a grand gesture, he doesn't deliberate, doesn't worry that he will Fall (although surely that must have been what he thought will happen if he survives this), there's no pomp around it, he thinks it and then does it. No hesitation.

Is this coming from an angel who just can't leave Heaven behind and longs to be a part of it? Who loves to follow rules? And let's not forget in those moments Aziraphale thought Crowley was most likely gone. That he probably left for Alpha Centauri. Last he heard from him he was told he was talking to an old friend and had no time for him. Why we NEVER talk about how that might have felt for Aziraphale? About his sadness?

Things are not as simple as Aziraphale has been supressing his emotions and lying to himself about how he feels and he should get over it and become free. That's not how this works. And first of all, he was suppressing his emotions OUT OF LOVE. His main goal was always to keep Crowley safe. They simply couldn't run away or hoodwink Heaven and Hell. They had nowhere to go. They had no hope and yet they kept loving each other. That's courage. I know we all grew up with Romeo and Juliet and Heathcliff and Cathy and we FORGOT that those were CAUTIONARY tales. And this is not what Aziraphale wants for them. He would never allow himself to go so fast he would hurt Crowley. He feels guilty enough for agreeing to the Arrangement and for meeting Crowley at all when he knows they can be discovered and punished at any point. And Crowley knows it and RESPECTS it. He does not tolerate Aziraphale's decision to not go on a date and to hell with circumstances. He understands Aziraphale's reasoning and he respects Aziraphale's decision. Don't forget, they have NO POWER. They can't change Heaven and Hell. They can't stop believing in God and work on their religious trauma. Their Heaven and Hell are real places with real power and they both BELONG to them. Aziraphale's trauma and his personality are deeply intertwined and he'd probably never be the kind of person who is open in showing their grief or stress like Crowley does. He will learn to be more open, I'm sure. With his love especially, we see him reaching for and touching his demon in S2. Openly being with him, looking at him without guarding himself. They got a little bit of freedom for themselves despite ALL odds. So. Just because Aziraphale is not crying and screaming and I dunno, tearing his hair out or whatever some people would have him do, does not mean he isn't overflowing with pain, fear, uncertainty, doubts, worries, and so much anxiety that if he let it all out, half of the solar system would turn to ashes.

Aziraphale does not need to suffer in S3 to level out Crowley's suffering. They are, unfortunately, equal in their pain as they are in love. If there is one thing Crowley would never abide, it'd be this take from the fandom. * One more note on grief: (obviously from my personal experience) As initiated by @anthony-crowleys-left-nut in a comment

It's not that I mind to know people care and worry etc, not at all. But asking how I am can only end up in me lying (fine, thank you) and both of us knowing it's not really true and feeling awkward or not lying (I feel like shit, mostly cos I can't sleep and think the world is a stupid unfair place) and both of us feeling awkward anyway. Does that make sense? I wish I could tell friends/colleagues to ask what I've been up to or something similar instead. What I've been reading (um, AO3, but I'll make something up), watching, do I want to go see some spring flowers bloom (I do). I think...this would probably work not just for someone who is grieving but also for someone who you know is dealing with depression for example or a serious illness etc. Edit 2. It's now almost (in 15 days) a year since my brother died. The random attacks of pain and grief have lessened and I have started to do more of the things I enjoyed before... and I am able to answer how are you questions without feeling like they are trying to mock me (the questions, not the people). So I suppose things do get ... lighter? More diffused? I'm not sure. Because it's still exactly as unfair that my brother has not lived this past year as it will be however many years pass I expect.

[thecommunalfoolboy]

I think tadc is gonna explore the different ways a person would cope with the situation of being trapped in a fake world and take them all to their logical extremes.

Like the whole thing with Jax is that he’s viewing this in a code breaker way. None of its real, the fake people aren’t real, so it doesn’t matter if I kill them and break things. Hell, what if that’s how we get out? What if you can break enough things that the whole code falls apart and the game shuts down? I find this idea the most interesting because i honestly think that’s how I’d react to the whole situation. Like if none of this shit has consequences then why not see just how far you can actually push it? Act insane and see how the game reacts. It’s like that option in a dialogue tree where the player sees it and is like ok no one would actually ever say that, but it’s insane enough that I wanna see what would happen if I did.

Kinger is the most realistic reaction in that he kinda literally just went crazy. Like he got locked in fairy land and lost it. He seems to at this point almost believe it’s all real too, he calls himself an actual king and not just a human who randomly got put in a chess piece body. He’s at the point that he’s just manic and accepted that this is reality now

Ragatha seems more like one of the early mindsets, like she arrived kinda recently. Her idea is to just play the game as it was supposed to be played. Go on the adventure, save the kingdom, oh no, the bad guys are here! She’s still trying to rationalize it all and act like it’s real. But after a while she’s probably gonna find it harder and harder to pretend that she cares about the next NPC’s problems. She’s gonna face the eternity trapped here one way or another, and when playing the game stops working she’s gonna have to find something that does.

Pomni’s so new to this all, she’s still going through the stages of grief. She’s so preoccupied with all this new stuff she hasn’t had to actually sit down and figure out how to respond yet. And most importantly, she still thinks there’s a way out- when she’s forced to realize that she’s stuck here for forever, she’s gonna have to figure out what’s next.

For Gangle and Zooble I’m honestly not sure. Maybe it’s just that they haven’t gotten as much screen time yet, but I can’t get quite the read on them comparatively. So idk if anyone has ideas lmk I guess

[godspeedviper]

How the therapists react to your "worst" symptoms - Headcanons

SFW || TW: mentions of self harm, mention of suicidal ideation, therapy sessions, very brief mention of (unlabeled) disordered eating, mention of psychosis & violent thoughts.

A/N: this was written by someone who has been in therapy for many years and has personal experience with these types of symptoms. this is not meant to romanticize any mental illness or symptoms of it. this is purely self indulgent fluff. just because your experience might be different doesn't make these experiences any less valid. if you don't like this simply do not read it, block if you must, and move on.

Jonathan Crane (Scarecrow)

He is the most objective and detached of the lot. Therefore he never seems to have much of a reaction no matter what you do or say to him. He really has seen it all before. This does help you feel less anxious as time goes on, knowing he won't ever judge you or ascribe any kind of morality to your actions.

"If it causes you distress or harm, then we should work towards eliminating it altogether." is his typical response to your concerns about your own coping mechanisms. "You do not owe anyone kindness, just remember to restrain yourself from causing harm whenever possible."

He is the only one to have no discernible reaction to your self harm scars/burns. One day, he noticed an especially fresh one and offered to disinfect and bandage the wound for you. He always gives you space to bring things up at your own pace, when you feel comfortable doing so.

"Not all of us have the capacity to be so gentle, and that's alright." he says about your outbursts. "I'm not known for being the warmest, but that doesn't make me any less skilled at my work, or any less worthy of respect. If you do not hold my lack of socially acceptable agreeableness against me, then you should not hold it against yourself."

Bonus: when you finally have the courage to mention the substance usage he remains as cool and detached as ever. "I am glad you were honest with me so we can monitor for any interactions with your medications. Know that I won't judge you for moderate usage, after all, do we not professionally refer to medications as drugs? It isn't ideal, but it is a way of self medicating. All I ask is that you be fully honest with me about your usage so I can better take care of you."

Hannibal Lecter (NBC)

He is surprisingly gentle and very soft spoken, although you were intimidated by him at first and the opulence of his office. He usually greets you with a warm smile and asks how your week went and if you've eaten yet today. He teaches you to enjoy food again, describing it as an art, and asking you to be mindful and present when enjoying a meal. Listen to your body, what it tells you about the ingredients, the quality of the meal, and the hands that made it.

He always asks you what you want to do, making sure to actively include you in your own treatment plan. He thoroughly explains treatment options, medications and their possible side effects, and has you weigh your options. This allows you to really analyze your own reactions and act accordingly when you are alone.

"Now, you do understand I am required to recommend inpatient treatment if you are feeling actively suicidal." he says, when you come in on an extra bad day. "However, I want to trust you and give you the option of what to do from here. If you think it will do you more harm than good, let me know, but you have to be honest."

One day you get the courage to ask why there is a first aid kit on his desk, though you already assume why. He simply looks at you and asks "Do you need it today?" before gently tending to your recent self harm wounds. He never calls you out for it, but he does periodically ask you upfront if you've been engaging in self injurious behaviors. If you respond yes, he asks to tend to your wounds, and if you say no, he celebrates with you. "Good. I'm proud of you for holding yourself back."

Bonus: when you land in the hospital, Hannibal makes sure to go visit you while your therapy slot is on hold. He never calls attention to the circumstances that lead you here, and focuses solely on your recovery and how he can't wait to have you back in the office soon.

Harleen Quinzel (Harley Quinn)

It doesn't take long for her to shed her professional demeanor. She makes you feel like you're talking to a close friend, yet manages to never fully lose the "doctor" in her. She offers you fidget toys as a way to ease the tension of talking about such vulnerable and heavy subjects.

She makes everything into a little game or a challenge to motivate you changing habits. Every time you manage to avoid indulging in negative coping mechanisms, she rewards you with a little heart shaped chocolate at the end of the session. On bad days, she simply encourages you to try again and she gifts you a cute bandaid at the end of the session to signify your healing from a bad day (sometimes, the bandaids come in handy for self harm wounds).

"Being childish can be a good thing!" she tells you. "Its important to have a little whimsy in your life. Just because you grew up doesn't mean you have to... ya know, grow up." She encourages you to try and add a little joy to your daily life. You start taking fuzzy tipped pens to work and keeping plushies at home for comfort. Surprisingly, it does help.

Every now and again she asks for your advice or assistance on minor things, such as which dress she should wear for a date, or what show to watch next. Sure, you are technically paying for her time, but this fact alone doesn't entirely relieve you of the feeling that you are burdensome. Whenever that feeling creeps back up, she reminds you of all the times you helped her make decisions until you admit your usefulness with a smile.

Bonus: "Hearing voices or other noises doesn't make you evil." is her reply when she learns of your psychotic symptoms. "Everyone is susceptible to experiencing psychosis. Hell, I've felt it when I was losing sleep in med school. It doesn't make you a bad person."

Hannibal Lecter (Silence of the Lambs)

You are intimidated by him at first, but his hypnotic voice grows on you. He always sounds so self assured, but never assertive. He has an almost paternal quality to him, making you feel simultaneously comfortable and protected.

He always listens to you intently, you never feel ignored by him. Hannibal is the only one that makes you feel seen and you tell him as much. "Oh everyone sees you my dear, you can be assured of that, but not everyone has the courage to acknowledge you. Keep this in mind for the next time you should feel the urge to do something drastic for attention."

You were worried you would eventually do something to turn him away, as you had to so many therapists before him. However, he simply scoffs at the idea that you could ever do anything that could possibly frighten him or upset him.

When you finally have the courage to tell him about the violent intrusive thoughts he remains as calm as ever. "In the past, we humans had to hunt to survive. We also had to protect ourselves and our kin. As time goes on, that propensity for violence remains, even if our survival is no longer dependent on it."

Bonus: You come clean to him about getting into a fight with someone, being entirely overtaken by rage and paranoia. You call yourself a monster and cry. "I have worked with serial killers, family annihilators, rapists the worst that the world has to offer. I know monsters. You are not one. You wanna know why?" You nod yes. "Because my dear, you have remorse and regret for your actions, they do not. Besides, you would not be sitting here with me if you did not want the anger to control you."

AO3 || Guidelines || Request || Ko-Fi

[sadokasochism]

For me, the most heartbreaking aspect of Ivan is that the poor clueless bastard didn't have the tools to express his affection in any way that didn't involve violence or manipulation, or weren't too inscrutable, quiet, or unseen to be picked up by Till.

I definitely interpret Ivan as autistic for several reasons, a big one being their Segyein teacher's notes about him:

It's just. Classic ND behaviour to me.

Not only does expressing emotion and communicating the way other kids do not come naturally to Ivan, but it's not as if he's been given a great example of coping with this from the Segyein.

Ivan managed to mask in a way that made him popular with other students, and got him in the good graces of their captors. He did everything expected of him to survive and thrive in this environment.

Then he meets Till, inscrutable and very different to the other kids, just like Ivan is. Except, Till doesn't mask. He doesn't change or try to endear himself to their captors, and he doesn't bend to anyone, no matter how much he is hurt and punished for it.

This is a new situation for Ivan, and he's never had anything to compare his feelings to. He also can't figure out how to communicate with Till, every interaction, no matter how well meaning, seems to end in failure.

I bring your attention to the cheer up comic, and how, again, autistic this interaction feels:

There could be many reasons why Ivan chose to say what he did, but to me it feels like ND bluntness not being received well. And that's fair! From Till's perspective Ivan is being a jerk for no good reason.

Instead of responding with glee towards Till laying him out (as we see from Ivan when they're a bit older), Ivan justs seems... really confused. Like he didn't expect that statement to upset Till that much, and he didn't expect Till to respond in the way he did. Everything was fine a second ago, what went wrong?

Then, Ivan uses the phrase he learned from Till in an attempt to self sooth. It might have been the first example of comfort after an injury/hurt he had ever seen, given how he defaults to it. And it was from Till trying to cheer up a flower.

This also shows some of Till's blindspots. He has grown up having to be vigilant, because violence and hurt have been a core part of his upbringing. This leads to anything he doesn't immediately, clearly understand being perceived as a threat or a slight, and so he reacts violently to Ivan's statement.

I'll also draw your attention to this comic where, as far as we know, Ivan is simply stating a true fact in a blunt manner:

In my interpretation, these types of interactions keep adding up, and Ivan is grasping at straws the whole time, trying to be closer to Till and failing every time.

Eventually, the only surefire way to get Till's attention is to piss him off, provoke him, manufacture scenarios to talk to him. I'm not excusing this behaviour, but I understand where Ivan could be coming from, from the perspective of both an emotionally immature/stunted child and/or an ND child.

Despite how much they fight and bicker, at every moment it really mattered, Ivan was there for Till. It was always Ivan coming to free him, to take off his collar or gag, and it was Ivan who led their escape.

Ivan couldn't leave Till behind when he went back for Mizi. Even with the confirmation that Till would choose Mizi over Ivan every time, Ivan couldn't leave him.

The miscommunication goes two ways though. It's insane to think that Till didn't care about Ivan at all. They were close as kids, and I doubt Till ever forgot about the escape he gave up.

We have the graduation messages, where Ivan is able to write something that could be reasonably interpreted as affectionate or fond towards Till.

Meanwhile, Till's message-

If we're being charitable with our interpretations, we can say this was Till's way of saying 'of course I remember you' and attempting to communicate that Ivan HAD left a lasting impact on him.

However, how could any reasonable person be expected to get THAT out of 'you stole my fucking pencil'? Ivan could have taken this one of two ways:

1) Omg he remembers me 🥰

2) he leans into his 'i will never be loved back' bias and thinks that Till really doesn't care about him at all

Who the hell knows what goes through that weird little brain of his. But given how Round 6 went, and what Ivan had to say in the confession comic, he obviously didn't think his impact was significant enough.

Then Alien Stage happens, and in Round 3 Ivan is FINALLY communicating his feelings in a way that is vulnerable and might even have a chance of being understood as love and yearning!

Till is unconscious through it until the very end.

Then in the next round, Mizi goes missing, and Till can't care about anything anymore.

Ivan finds him after the private performance, takes off his gag, and just holds him. Again, Till is unconscious for all of this.

Then, in Round 6, not only is Till distraught from the disappearance of Mizi, but he's given no time to process what the fuck is going on before Ivan is dead at his feet. Till might have finally had a chance to really understand where Ivan was coming from, how he really felt all this time, and Ivan DIES.

And still, Ivan's most transparent act of affection? It's delivered with violence. He's kissing a distraught Till who tries to push him away, and neither of them are happy. He puts his hands around Till's neck, not really hurting him, but it's enough to look convincing for the cameras, and it's enough for Till to go limp and wait for death. Ivan's final loving act is to give Till a soft look with blood pouring out of his mouth, that Till still does not see, and then let go before falling to the ground.

It's just a collection of failures. We see from Ivan that he truly loved Till, made a lot of selfless decisions for his sake, was filled with so much longing and affection, but he just couldn't get it across in a way that doesn't seem fucking deranged from an outsider's perspective. And when he DID manage to communicate his feelings more clearly, it was to a Till that was unconscious, or too distracted/dense/traumatised to see Ivan's actions as ones of love.

There's no guarantee that Till would have reciprocated even if Ivan had managed to communicate his feelings in a healthier way, but there was at least a CHANCE. At least Ivan could have gotten some closure, even if he was rejected.

Instead Ivan died thinking he was completely unloved by the person who he cared about more than anything else, and his last ditch effort to make Till understand was deeply flawed and uncomfortable.

If these kids had grown up any other way, maybe they could have had a chance. Unfortunately, the world they were in didn't equip them to not hurt eachother in their attempts to grow closer.

[alonetimelover]

Do you think you could do a blurb of competitive swimmer!y/n? I always see blurbs of y/n being different types of athletes but never a competitive swimmer lol. Face claim could be kaylee mckeown?

pairing: Harry x swimmer!reader

fc: Kaylee McKeown

a/n: I am so sorry it took me so long to make this request, but despite that, i hope you'll enjoy it!

masterlist taglist

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harryupdates

liked by ynupdates, hArrysbtch and 45 302 others

harryupdates HARRY followed YN YSN. YN is a competitive swimmer from Australia, and she's been following Harry for a while (she stated multiple times that she's a fan)!

view all 2 201 comments

ynupdates 'i mean, i always request his [harry's] songs at practice. i think he's great' GIRLLLLLL

⤷ ynsmybestie she manifested, i think

hArrysbtch isn't she an Olympian?

⤷ ynupdates she is! gold medalist too!!!

harrysmoustache ohhhhh, i see somethin cookin

user93 why

user023 that's odd but im gonna wait and see what this unfolds

ynsmymama girl, teach me how to make my crush notice me

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ynupdates

liked by ynsmybestie, harryupdates and 8 302 others

ynupdates YN via her IG story!!

view all 102 comments

harryupdates oh, she's hilarious!!!

ynsmybestie my poor baby! i would react the same if Chros Evans followed me

⤷ ynsfan39 i would react that way if SHE followed me

⤷ ynsmybestie true!

hArrysbtch oh i already love her

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harryupdates

liked by ynupdates, hArrysbtch and 93 302 others

harryupdates HARRY VIA HIS DELETED IG STORY !!!

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hArrysbtch iendjskiw

hArrysbtch what the fuck

hArrysbtch i don't know what to react to first? like....

hArrysbtch ONE DIRECTION SHIRT?????? HAVING A CRUSH????? COPING YN'S STORY????

ynupdates ijust know yn is smiling so much and kicking her feet

harrysmoustache i just spend some time on yns ig and let me tell you: she's beautiful, she's successful and she's hilarious! Good for you harry

ynsmybestie well.... he's having a concert in Sydney soon

⤷ harrysfan93 why does it matter?

⤷ ynsmybestie yn said multiple times that she wanted to attend at least one night in Sydney! i just hope they somehow meet each other!

harrysfan82 harry, learn how to use your close friends or correct ig account

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yourinstagram

liked by yourbestfriend, harryupdates, harrystyles and 103 202 others

yourinstagram 🍒 out! i think i won't be able to jump around though... unless...

view all 10 202 comments

yourbestfriend i have tape, babe! you're gonna be jumping and not flashing people for free!

⤷ yourinstagram life saver!

ynupdates have a good night!

harryupdates this is what i call THE outfit

hArrysbtch and SHES HOT???? fuck off

harrysmoustache i love women

harrystyles red is definitely my favourite colour

⤷ yourinstagram favourite enough to sing cherry for me?

⤷ harrystyles nice try

⤷ ynsmybestie yn blink twice if you're freaking out

⤷ yourinstagram *blink* *blink*

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harryupdates

liked by ynupdates, stylesbabie and 78 302 others

harryupdates "Why so many of you are wearing red, huh? What? Oh! You guys work quick! I'm not blushing, go away! Go away! I'm not singing Cherry, it's y'all's fault!" HARRY TONIGHT IN SYDNEY

view all 3 202 comments

hArrysbtch he was blushing so much, oh god!

harrysmoustache he's smitten

ynsmybestie i know yn was giggling there

⤷ harrysfan40 she was! i was standing near her and she was blushing too!

stylesbabie harry has a cruuuuuush

harrysmylife i think we gonna witness the beginning of the great relationship

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yourinstagram

liked by harrystyles, harryupdates and 193 302 others

yourinstagram all hearts for the fruit man 🍉🍒🍇🍓🥝

view all 12 202 comments

yourbestfriend oh we look good good

comment liked by harrystyles and 3 201 others

ynupdates night 2 baby!

harryupdates i can't wait for another interaction tonight!!

stylesbabie i swear im not drooling

harrysmoustache i still live women

harrystyles no red?

⤷ yourinstagram who said im not wearing any red?

comment deleted

ynsmybestie yn, baby, i saw that comment, and i have one sentence to say: you naughty naughty girl, get that man!

——————————————————————————————

The audience for the second show in Sydney was incredible. The energy beaming from the crowd and towards Harry was almost overwhelming, hard to believe in. People were jumping and having the time of their lives. And so did Harry. Especially because of one of the audience members that was very special to Harry for the past few weeks.

"Okay, guys! Now is the moment for some talk, isn't it?" Harry screamed into the mic and smiled when the arena was filled with screams and whistles. He loved the love he was receiving. "Today was incredible whether, did you guys catch some sunlight, took a walk, swim maybe? You guys know how to swim, right?"

Once more, people around Harry screamed from the top of their lungs, but he got his eyes on that one person. Just her.

"What is it, that the person that swims the best in this room screams so quietly, huh?"

He took a few steps forward to get closer to where YN was standing with her best friend. She just shrugged at his question and grinned at him, eyes shining.

"She's shrugging. Well, what do I need to do to make you scream more, goldie?"

And that was the moment when Harry really regretted the question he had just posed. Or maybe regretted wasn't the best word to describe it. Let's say he wished he asked that in a more private setting. Though he didn't mind the loudness that the question had caused.

"A few things, really!"

Harry was surprised that YN was able to be heard but smiled at the response, giving her a thumb up.

Well, maybe there really was something growing between them.

——————————————————————————————

hArrysbtch

liked by harryupdates, ynupdates and 34 202 others

hArrysbtch this is harry right after asking yn what he could do to make her scream more and her replying with: a few things.... boy, you had one job

view all 2 101 comments

harryupdates he was so extra tonight!

ynupdates the flirting went to another level

ynsmybestie he called her goldie 🫠

harrysmoustache he could flirt, smirk, tease but he decided to just do the 'thumb up' smh

ynsmybestie oh they're gonna be together in no time !!!

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harryupdates

liked by yourinstagram, hArrysbtch and 102 204 others

harryupdates HARRY SWIMMING IN SYDNEY TODAY! YN WAS SEEN WITH HIM!

view all 5 302 comments

ynupdates show-off

hArrysbtch i know he wanted to impress her

harrysmoustache the back muscles...

yourinstagram feet not placed properly, and twisted posture

⤷ harrystyles i thought it was 'that is very nice, harry'

⤷yourinstagram i was talking about you back muscles

⤷ ynsmybestie girl, have you seen yours? they are immaculate

⤷ harrystyles i agree

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yourinstagram

liked by harrystyles, yourbestfriend and 201 302 others

yourinstagram swam, dined and wined with you 🧜🏻‍♂️

view all 14 302 comments

harrystyles is that... is that a merman?

⤷ yourinstagram didn't you say you felt like in h2o just add water?

⤷ harrystyles naur

harryupdates soft launch!

ynupdates you looked beautiful!!! where is that dress from?

⤷ harrystyles it's Gucci.

⤷ yourinstagram no, it's not. it's my mom's dress altered to my measurements, love!

hArrysbtch she's soo beautiful

ynsmybestie how did you manifested baby?

⤷ yourinstagram pure luck this time

——————————————————————————————

a/n: here we go with another athlete!reader. i feel like im collecting them like infinity stones. two down, more to go...

[shinxeysartgallery]

J is kind of an asshole and I think we all realize that especially after what she did in Episode 8. Still think she's being hated on a bit too hard though.

She knowingly sided with Cyn, despite knowing what she was responsible for, and that's obviously not a good thing. However, do keep in mind that all of the affected Elliot Manor drones are just traumatized children at the end of the day. Cyn put all of them through immeasurable horrors. Even without Cyn's influence, the drones were treated horribly by the humans (other than Tessa). And based off the scratched-off armbands that we saw N, V, and J have that also match Cyn's armband, there's strong implications that all three of them are also "zombie drones" much like Cyn is herself. We don't know what they were subjected to before being tossed into the dump and later being found by Tessa.

As J and V are fighting, J makes an interesting comment that sheds some light on her motivations. "...It tricked me, too." Obviously, that was never elaborated on, but it strongly implies that she had made some sort of a deal with Cyn for an unknown reason. We got confirmation that V also had made a deal with Cyn, which was basically that she'd do whatever Cyn wanted as long as she wouldn't hurt N (and then would leave them both alone). Don't know if N also made a deal, but he's likely there as a part of V's deal.

So it makes me wonder, what exactly did Cyn promise J? Did she tell her that she could bring back Tessa? Promise to not let her die again? Something else entirely? Based on her comment to V, SOMETHING was definitely promised that ended up being a lie. Everyone reacts to trauma differently. Saw a post a while back (will hyperlink it later if I can find it again) by another user doing a very good breakdown of how they perceived the drones' personalities changed as a result of their trauma. N became a doormat because he kept getting hurt or hurting others every time he stood up for himself or someone else. (They also add that V's coldness towards him contributed to it and made him lose a lot of self-confidence.) V became rather cold because she was basically forced to turn off her emotions to cope with what she was doing. And she was purposefully mean to N to chase him away as an attempt to protect him from Cyn. J became a corporate bootlicker because she was terrified of being discarded again, so now she feels like she has to prove that she's useful.

And I think those theories all definitely hold some water here and help to explain why J still chose to side with Cyn, even after realizing that whatever their deal was was a lie. It's likely that she realized that if she decided to side against Cyn, Cyn would've just killed her straight-up. And that's really not out of the question, considering what she did to N and V once she realized that those two had asked too many questions and realized that she was the bad guy they wanted nothing to do with. If J had also gone against her, she'd just be replaced with either a clone that had its memories wiped (as evident by Cyn's comment to N in Episode 7: "your clones will forgive me") or a personality shift, or just flat-out a completely different drone altogether. There's also her comment towards V during their fight. "I promise it's better on the winning team.", which implies that J had full belief that Uzi wouldn't have been able to stop Cyn and Cyn was going to get her way no matter what. That paired up with the personality shift might imply that she felt trapped. Cyn preyed on her vulnerability and fears of being discarded and weaponized them against her. She believed that Cyn was going to win no matter what, and if she went against Cyn, she was going to be discarded again. Despite knowing she was tricked, she probably stays loyal to Cyn because she's terrified of that outcome. She doesn't want to die, she doesn't want to be thrown away again. But the only person she feels she can get that security from is the same one that basically caused all of her problems. That same person is practically the equivalent of a god in the universe and seemingly NOTHING can stop it. What choice does she have in that perspective?

I still feel like she's an incredibly tragic character. Horribly mistreated by humans, forced to watch (or participate in) her best friend's death at the hands of the one she despises the most, sees the same bestie be horribly mutilated and disfigured, be forced to commit horrible atrocities herself, and be manipulated and lied to. She deserves a redemption arc.

You're obviously allowed to still hate/dislike her, but that's just my thoughts on it!

[stackslip]

the aftermath of scar's first attack on the elrics has a markedly different tone in 03 and mangahood and ive seen some mangahood fans says it's an example of why they dislike 03 over manga/brotherhood—in 03, the brothers are very clearly closed off from the rest of the mustang gang and reaffirm their own strong bond to each other above all, not trusting the adult military members; whereas in mangahood there IS a moment of complicity and relaxation with the mustang gang for coming to rescue them, and a lot of people cite it as part of their endearment for mangahood—the elrics aren't alone, and they learn to trust and love other people, including the military adults who have their best interests in mind.

difference in taste asides, i think that this is forgetting a crucial element of the previous eps and why exactly 03 ed and al react the way they do. unlike mangahood, where scar just appears as a demonic and horrific threat without much context except that he's from ishbal, in 03 the elrics learn about ishbal and the military's atrocities there right before confronting scar. they're told firsthand that it wasnt the heroic military action they'd been told, but a savage genocide that their friends in the military actively partook in! ed and al have a whole conversation about whether scar is justified before ever confronting him, they learn of his losses, and al.... actively believes that scar IS justified, and that were al in scar's shoes he too might snap this way. scar's actions are immediately recontextualized to the viewer before we see him attack our protagonists, a great amount of sympathy is given to him by the narrative and by alphonse. and not only do the brothers have to suddenly contend with how their plucky military colleagues have aided in genocide, and that they have been actively lied to by the military, but then ed gets the bomb dropped on him that mustang killed winry's parents. his superior officer and the guy leading the plucky military crew is directly responsible for the suffering of their close friend!

so like, between this, scar almost killing ed but showing al certain empathy and promising edward he won't harm his brother, having to swallow that not only is the military is far worse an institution than either the brothers suspected but that the people cheerfully teasing them and showing concern for their safety have been active participants in unbelievable levels of suffering (including the suffering of an amestrian girl they DO know)..... yeah, of course al and ed end up being far more closed off to the mustang gang after scar's attack! ed didnt just almost die and lose his arm, he has to suddenly contend with very ugly truths and how much mustang might have been hiding from him til now. no wonder they reaffirm their bond to each other—how do you trust these people when they're still in the military after being ordered to murder innocent people and the help lie that it was a simple and necessary military operation? ed at this point is still somewhat stuck in his "well Equivalent Exchange means the world is fair and also i got some deep racist issues embedded in me, so surely the military didnt commit genocide for no good reason right?" but like.... he's still swallowing the pill that he was lied to, that mustang murdered winry's parents on direct orders from the military, that his becoming a state alchemist really was selling his soul to the devil. and al is coping with his own mortality and body, and with how what he would have done had he been scar, how fucked the entire situation is.

honestly it's a much better take on scar imo but it's also yet another example of how 03 is bitingly critical of not only the amestrian military as an institution, but of the people who willingly participate in it. there's no neat separation of the good military heroes and the evil military dogs—once you join the amestrian military you ARE their dog. you've signed away your soul. you're an active participant in their crimes, unless you leave and actively begin opposing them. scar pointed out himself he would have let ed live had ed quit the military earlier! he's only interested in going after the people who have been actively participating in amestris's military atrocities. and yeah it does mean that the mustang crew in 03 is not the lovable goof squad or Found Family people care about in mangahood, but tbh 03 is just fundamentally uninterested in these kinds of dynamics at all.

i think it's ok to have different taste and say, well, i need/want a crew of lovable goofs and found family to enjoy fma as a whole! but i think it's completely unfair to criticise 03 for saying that your favourite war criminals are.... war criminals, and that the teenage protagonists' realisation of the extent of their crimes should not at all affect their dynamic with the crew.

[nervoussagittarius]

got to have a taste of a pretty girl

matt sturniolo x singer!reader

summary: a past experience is brought up causing you to finally be comfortable telling your boyfriend your biggest secret, request

warnings: fluff, language, coming out, slight angst

“hey matt.” you said as he picked up your phone call. your current position on your couch was one of nervousness. you sat on the edge, hunched over, with your leg bouncing with anxiety.

“hey baby, what’s up?”

“so i have something to show you and was wondering if you’d be willing to come over?”

“yeah absolutely. i’ll see you in 10, love you!” he said hanging up the phone.

to rewind, you were cleaning out a few boxes this morning when you came across a cd with some of your old, unreleased, songs on it. you had a habit of recording stuff that was almost to personal to put out and hiding it away. you used this method almost as a coping mechanism. out of sight, out of mind.

curiosity came over you and you decided to see exactly what songs were in this record. a few of them were really nothing, just some stuff you had made when you were messing around with different vocals and settings. but the last song was something that you really did want to hide. you never meant to come across it again.

this song described the first intimate experience you ever had with another girl. you were about 18 at this point, close to a year before you even knew matt. you had known for a while that you liked women and men, but the only person you told was your best friend alexa.

now alexa was completely boy crazy. never once thinking she might be into girls. until one night when you guys decided to go to some random la house party a mutual friend was hosting.

after a few hours you both started feeling flirty and we’re having a lot of fun dancing with each other. this was when alexa decided to tell you that she had thought you were her favorite person she’d ever met and how if she were to ever experiment with a women it would definitely be with you.

one thing led to another and she led you into her bed. only to wake up the next morning saying it was a good time but it was a mistake that will never happen again. she could pretend all she wanted but it already happened. so you guys went your separate ways.

you weren’t devistated my any means, you almost expected things to happen this way. she went on to keep her boyfriend and you moved on with your life.

you never really felt comfortable telling anyone else about your sexuality though. it was a really scary process. you never knew how that person would react, and you were fine never being in a romantic relationship with a girl. you really did want to spend the rest of you life with matt. it was only far though that matt knew the real you.

matt knocked on your door exactly 9 minutes and 23 seconds after he hung up the phone. you were so nervous you kept count.

he let himself in like normal and made his way to your couch, leaning down to give you a kiss.

“okay, so what did you want to show me” matt asked with a dopey smile on his face.

“well,” you started. “i found something this morning and i’d like you to listen to it.”

you made your way over to the cd player and pressed play on the song, not so formally named, pretty girls.

a long 2 minutes and 26 seconds went by before the song ended.

“it was a good song, sweetheart. i love all of your music, but i’m a little confused about what it means. are you trying to tell me something? did someone do something to you? i’m not really comprehending.” matt began to ramble.

you took his hands in your, “okay i’ll explain. so basically, about a year before we started dating i was friends with this girl named alexa.” you stopped to take a deep breath but it came out shakier then expected.

“it’s okay love take your time”

you couldn’t get through the rest of the story.

“i’m not straight, matt”

you could see his eyes slightly widen but he nodded at you to continue.

“i’m bisexual, and alexa was the first girl i even did anything with. it didn’t really mean anything, to either of us, but she was the only one that knew and we were at a party. and she wanted to experiment, but she had a boyfriend. and it’s all a little blurry, but i needed to tell you because i’m really tired of hiding it.” your eyes started to fill with tears at your rant. it all was settling in on you.

“i really don’t want to lose you because i love you so fucking much, but i had to tell you how i really feel. and the song doesn’t really have anything to do about it, but it seemed like a good lead way into the topic.”

matt let go of your hands. you looked up at him in confusion and wariness. he instead grabbed your face and used the pads of his thumbs to wipe the tears that had begun to fall. he leaned his forehead against yours with tears also in his eyes.

“can i say something now?” matt asks.

you gave him a nod with a slight laugh.

“i am so proud of you.” matt said with a raspy chuckle. “i am so grateful that you felt comfortable enough to share that with me. you have not idea what it means. i see how much shit people who are homosexual go though and it’s really scary. so thank you.”

“and you could never lose me for being honest with me. if anything it makes me love you even more.”

once matt finished talking, you leaned forward to give him a passionate kiss. matt layed his back into your couch as he pulled you into his chest so he was holding you.

you went on to have a long and intense conversation on the entire event that happened between you and alexa. you also told him how and when you realized you were bisexual.

“i kinda want to put the song out.” you said as you played with the hem on his shirt.

“i think that’s a great idea, baby”

an: the end. i’m sorry it’s kinda short but full song credits go to mother renee rapp. i could’ve never written this without her. i hope y’all enjoyed🤍

[strelitzia-mystery1097]

Cloud 'needs so much therapy that it isn't funny' Strife

*spoilers* for Ff7 Rebirth.

So Sephiroth really is trying to break Cloud more than in the original.

To start off, Sephiroth tries to make Cloud think that Tifa wasn't Tifa. That she was fake.

Why would he do that?

Answer: Because she's the one to piece together Cloud's memories. If Cloud can't trust her than he can't trust her account.

He also does his usual tricks of 'Black Materia', 'Puppet', 'Reunion', ect.

But Cloud this time around is constantly getting harassed and manipulated by Sephiroth, like way more than in the OG. Cloud also is coming to different conclusions and ideas from the OG like for example, he's degrading. He thinks that's why his memories are a mess because of degradation.

Even when he takes one step forward by remembering Zack, he then thinks Zack got washed away by the river instead of that infantry guy.

There's even times when Cloud straight repeats something Sephiroth says word for word and it doesn't register to him.

But yeah constantly his mind is under onslaught of Sephiroth.

By the time when we get to the Temple of the Ancients I'd argue that Cloud's mental state is worse than what it was in the OG in the scene when he gives Sephiroth the Black Materia.

In the OG he still has the creepy giggle moment but he snaps out of it. And when he gives the Black Materia to Sephiroth it's an out of body experience where we clearly see Cloud's inner self be against it but powerless to giving his body giving the Black Materia to Sephiroth or to beating up Aerith.

But after that Cloud finally realises something is horribly wrong with him. That Sephiroth can control him and almost doesn't go after Aerith because he's scared of himself.

...And Rebirth Cloud has it worse in my opinion.

There is no inner self. And Cloud is an obedient puppet that Sephiroth is toying with. Sephiroth already had the Black Materia and throws to Cloud and tells him to give it to him, and Cloud is almost eager to obey. Tifa tries to stop him and Aerith does too and Cloud chases after her and it's almost worse than silently beating her up because now he's toying with her while still so eager. She gives it to him and Cloud only snaps out of it after he gives it to Sephiroth. He then tries to save Aerith and well-

He wakes up after the multiverse stuff and the OG dream of Aerith being like 'imma go bye'.

But this time he doesn't freak out, terrified that Sephiroth can control him. He just... doesn't acknowledge it. He just goes on to find Aerith. When Yuffie asks what happened how did Sephiroth get the Black Materia if he didn't beat up Cloud he just goes 'uh...' and when Tifa asks him to let her know if he's getting weird thoughts he asks Tifa about what she means. She gives the example of thinking she's fake and he apologises, but the fact that he doesn't immediately realise that she's also talking about Black Materia is a bit of red flag.

And he might as well be using those red flags later on for semafor because oh my god-

What happened with Aerith's death is weird. At first I thought it was two worlds overlapping but no-

Cloud's mind f^@&ing snapped and thinks he saved Aerith.

That's why Cloud doesn't properly react to Aerith's death. No speech about his feelings and no scene of putting her in the water. He's full on hallucinating her. Whether that is Aerith's ghost or not doesn't matter because he's convinced himself that she's fine.

That's why he talks about Aerith waking up or going home because he can't cope with her being dead.

Sephiroth screwed with Cloud's mind so much here that he genuinely is more insane now than what he was in the OG.

So you can bet when they get to the Northern Crater, Sephiroth will use the truth of Aerith dead along with the truth of Nibelheim to break Cloud even more.

...And now I have to wait 3+ years for part 3. Rebirth really was a gift that gave me despair.

[maximumqueer]

Sometimes I forget how emotionally constipated/immature Zoro is as a character, and then we get panels like this

that act as a stark reminder, that Zoro, for all of his strengths, is borderline incapable of processing any emotion (but especially emotion tied to a perceived failure or loss) in a healthy way.

Because while Zoro is a more stoic character, especially when compared to Luffy, being stoic does not equal not showing emotion, it just means being over all more reserved in reactions, or having the process of reacting to an emotional moment be internal rather than external. And this line from Zoro does not read as him being stoic, but rather as him lashing out over the perceived loss at Egghead, and directing that anger and pain at his captain who is reacting in an more outwardly emotional (and to be honest a more emotionally healthy) way. This does not come across to me a Zoro processing what happened in a more inward directed manner, but instead him being unable to process it (or unwilling to) and coping with that inability by being a bit of a dick.

And this isn't to say that I hate Zoro or think this is a bad character trait to have. The opposite really. I think it makes him all the more interesting, and also provides excellent contrast between him and Luffy. Because while it is fun to joke about Luffy and Zoro sharing a braincell, or being two halves of a whole idiot, they do have stark differences between them - emotional maturity (or lack there of on Zoro's part) being one of them. Luffy wears his heart on his sleave, is completely fine and capable of going through the process of acknowledging an emotion, allowing himself to feel the emotion, and allowing himself to cry if necessary, especially post-ts. Zoro, on the other hand, can't even admit out loud that Vegapunk dying was sad or could have any effect on the moral of the crew and his captain.

It honestly, in a strange way, reminds me of the way Luffy used to react to loss (losing his crew in Sabaody, losing Ace during Marineford). Because while the external reactions are vastly different - with Luffy crying and harming himself, and Zoro lashing out verbally - they both stem from the same thing. Denial. Luffy in those moments did not want to accept that his brother had died or that his crew was gone, and in this moment Zoro does not want to accept that they failed to rescue Vegapunk, or that he (in his own mind) failed to defeat Lucci. (But even when Luffy was struggling to accept the reality of losing his crew and brother, he was still allowing himself to feel, it just the way he went about expressing that emotion was actively harmful to himself - both mentally and physically. Zoro can't even seem to bring himself to express the emotions he's feeling, even in an unhealthy way.)

And while Luffy has grown and matured in this way, being able to process loss and the emotions that come with it in a healthier way, Zoro hasn't. At least, not yet. I'm not expecting him to be outwardly emotional like Luffy, but instead have him realize that allowing himself to feel emotions after loss does not make him weak or lesser of a person/fighter. I don't know if this is the direction Zoro will go as a character, but I personally think it would be interesting to see a more thorough break down of this aspect of Zoro, as it has been more heavily hinted at as of late.

[captainx-camino]

I'm about to be the Internet's most hated person again but, uhhhh...I'm a chronic over analyzer, so, deal with it.

So, Jeremy - and here me out on this - wasn't the cold-blooded murder kid the movie wants you to believe he is.

*insert shocked and horrified reaction here*

Yeah, that one will do....

Anyway...

Okay, so first of all: Jeremy's parents are AWFUL.

His father is clearly an abusive drunk and his mother is clearly a traumatized beaten wife who makes excuses for her husband's abuse.

Jeremy wasn't lying about what his parents were - we can see that through their behavior when they're shown and by small clues in the background of the shot.

His father probably became abusive due to feeling he could no longer fulfill his role in the household and succumbed to drinking to patch his depression.

His mother probably took the brunt of this, causing her to fall into fawning and do the only thing she could do to keep the household together. A very common response to domestic violence is to dote on the child in an aggressively overbearing way - which we see her do.

Additionally, the only person we learn of the incident from is the 'Karen' of the town - who states the boy was bad news. But was he really? Or was he a troubled child dealing with severe abuse at home and escaping into himself?

Was he a 'bad kid'? Or was he just different?

(There are some other points but I have like 10 min to write this so you get what you get.)

Personally, one of the things that really drove home for me that Jeremy wasn't the monster he was made out to be is how he died:

You want to tell me that this "cold-blooded killer" went to his treehouse to hide from the cops after committing his awful crimes? That doesn't sound like some crazed murderer to me - that sounds like a scared child running away to the one place he felt secure.

Which he still does, by the way. As a fucking ghost who has now been trapped in his living nightmare with the two people who probably abused him for 20-some-odd years.

With the given evidence, I shall construct you a possible alternative series of events that makes far more sense than his simply killing his parents...

-Jeremy comes home from school, his dad is already in a mood.

-Mom is baking in the kitchen in an attempt to forget the throbbing in her right eye

-Someone, possibly Jeremy, makes an offhanded remark that unintentionally triggers his father.

-The situation escalates with Jeremy becoming the target of his father's aggression this time.

-the father, already several sheets to the wind, goes after Jeremy in a fit of rage.

-the altercation continues, eventually ending up with Jeremy and his father tussling in the garage.

-Jeremy grabs at his father's abandoned tools in an attempt to protect himself and lands a hit, killing his father.

-Jeremy's mother, a victim of abuse herself, is too traumatized to react appropriately to the situation.

-Because her coping mechanism is to fawn, she reacts negatively towards Jeremy.

-Her first reaction is to scream and panic, asking Jeremy what he has done and believing that he has ruined their family that she has worked so hard to keep intact.

-Her defensiveness causes her to lash out at Jeremy and attack him.

-Jeremy is once again forced to defend himself, knowing no other way of fending her off.

-this altercation also ends in a defensive strike towards his assailant with another convenient item within the room the attack took place.

-After the incident, Jeremy, a child, quickly realizes that he is going to be in trouble.

-Jeremy's first instinct upon hearing the approaching police sirens is not to flee custody, but to hide in his childhood treehouse.

-When authorities inevitably find him and coax him down, he slips, breaking his neck instantly.

-This untimely demise causes him to be stuck in the world of the living with no other contact besides the people who neglected and abused him, causing him to become desperate for escape.

-That desperation was answered by the single person who was able to see him in 20+ years and Astrid just got caught in that crossfire.

I'm gonna say it now because I know how y'all are: This post is not to justify what he did to either of his parents or Astrid. It is simply what I have gathered ACTUALLY happened leading up to Jeremy's death and his possible true motivation to return to the world of the living outside of "ooooOOOOOOoooo so he can KILL AGAIN~" which is frankly just boring.

You don't have to believe it. I am not saying this interpretation is canon.

It's just what I picked up on watching the film.

Do with that what you do.

[krispycreamcake]

hello! I really like your writing! If you don't mind may I please request headcanons on how laito would react to someone (a bride or classmate or something) who always tried to make him laugh by telling him jokes and stuff. please and thank you!

Headcanons on how Laito would react to someone always trying to cheer him up

🃏- Now everyone knows Laito is always in the mood for fun

🃏- Well to be fair, his fun and other people's fun are two entirely different types of fun

🃏- Usually he likes to mentally mess with you, tease your mind, make your head spin because he gets a sick thrill out of it

🃏- That isn't to say he's not one to indulge another person's idea of what it's like to humour oneself

🃏- Be it a bride, a friend, a classmate, he'll lend you an ear

🃏- Don't be fooled, his patience is extremely thin and unless you're the peak of comedy, he'll get bored quickly and easily turn the conversation around into something that benefits him

🃏- Now, if you're strong willed and can ignore his words and actions, he'll respect that

🃏- If anything, it makes you more interesting, which then makes him want to listen to more of your futile attempts to make him laugh or sport a smile

🃏- Let's say it's lunch hour and you're sitting at his table. Depending on your relationship, he'll either leave you and your jokes high and dry to go make out with some girl in a broom closet, or he'll entertain you

🃏- Over time of course, his tolerance grows and he doesn't believe himself when he eventually starts enjoying your company and your positive nature

🃏- He's grown accustomed to having you around and subconsciously counts on you to improve his mood

🃏- Maybe he got a scolding from Reiji just before school and he's ticked off, tell him how he looks emo, you might get a smirk (you will)

🃏- He'll probably minimize this feeling as nothing other than boredom (he's afraid to admit he doesn't feel completely numb around you)

🃏- It's such an odd thing for someone to genuinely want to make his day better by giving him something without him having to do anything in return

🃏- See this is where it'll kinda fuck him up

🃏- It's not about the jokes or the great atmosphere you seem to carry around yourself whenever you guys are together

🃏- It's the fact that he's having trouble coping with the idea that someone wants him to feel good without the use of sex

🃏- So maybe you're trying to use him, get closer to him and when he's his most vulnerable, you'll strike at him when he's fully exposed

🃏- He cannot have that be a possibility, he'll lose his shit

🃏- A part of him is glad that despite all his bullshit, you're there for him in your own way

🃏- Another part of him is telling him to run far far away

🃏- By attempting to getting close with Laito, even if it's something as simple as jokes and smiles, he'll consider it a major red flag and might not know what to do with himself

🃏- After all, what if he's wrong and he just pushed away the only person that cared about him?

🃏- Humans, women, people, feelings, society. It's all just too confusing for him

🃏- "Ne~ Bitch-chan, you're so quiet. Ah- I get it, do I need to tell you a joke today? Or should we improve your mood some other way hm?"

[6lostgirl6]

Yandere Alphabet - Demon!Dean Winchester

TW: Toxic Relationship, Possessive Behavior, Controlling Behavior, Hints of Physical Abuse, Hints of Verbal Abuse, Kidnapping, Mentions of Murder, Isolation And Spanking As Punishment, Cursing, Manipulation. A/N: Please inform me if I did not tag something correctly. Please know the difference between fictional and reality. While fictional, these types of relationships are extremely toxic, especially in real-life. If your relationship is showcasing these toxic behaviors, please seek help from someone to get out safely. Reblogs are heavily appreciated!!

Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

He’s a physical lover, and he doesn’t give two fucks about PDA. He’ll kiss and touch you whenever and wherever he likes. He always gives you heated, passionate kisses while grasping all over your body and pressing you up against him. When he’s really affected, he’ll growl while kissing you, and his eyes will flash black on occasion.

Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

Very messy. Demon Dean, at this point, is a malevolent being and will resort to more grotesque methods when it comes to his darling. Even if it means killing innocent people who look at you the wrong way or dare touch you, well, try. He’ll break the person’s bones before they even lay a finger on you.

Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

Depending on how you react to the situation, his treatment of you varies. If you behave, he'll treat you good by his definition. However, if you react badly, he's going to not react well. Yes, he’ll mock you, because we need to remember that he may love you, but that doesn't change his nature. He has a cruel sense of humor.

Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

He’ll make you come with him on his killing sprees. You’re not a fan of blood; that’s too bad. You’ll just have to get used to it, because that’s all you’re ever going to see besides him. Blood and carnage.

Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

Demon Dean still has some of his old traits from when he was human. He doesn't like expressing his emotions until he trusts you enough. Which would take a long time. However, when he finally trusts you, he’ll be more open about his feelings for you. He still keeps things close to his chest, though he might never speak with you about it. 

Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

Oh, he’s pissed.

Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

No, your relationship isn't a game to him. But getting you to fall in love with him will be like a game, and he'll triumph. It’s only a matter of time. Demon Dean wouldn't like seeing you try to escape; it would automatically anger him. He’ll lash out at you.

Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Your worst experience with him would be your fights with him. He's scary when he’s angry, especially when it's towards you. He’ll practically scream in your face and manhandle you. Another thing would be him forcing you to see his killing sprees. He doesn't trust you enough to leave you on your own, so you'll have to witness his brutality.

Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

When it comes to your future with him, you’re stuck with him, and not even death would separate you. He’ll secretly try to uncover a way to turn you into a demon. You'll be isolated from hunters; demons wouldn't dare approach you. He’s the only thing you’ll ever need; nobody else can help you.

Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

Extremely, however, it’s not because he’s insecure; you simply belong to him and are completely off-limits. Coping, what’s that? He’s going to lash out in a violent way at the person attempting to flirt with you. He left people bloodied to a pulp on the floor before, and he has done worse.

Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

It’s discrete, but he’s a little softer around you, and he would let you get away with small things that he wouldn’t tolerate if it were another person. As a demon, he’s not afraid to show you how deep his love runs for you. He’s clingy and always has a hand grabbing you somewhere. He’s very possessive, and he tends to keep you to himself.

Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

When it comes to demon dean, there is no time for courting or lightly approaching you about his feelings. When he kidnapped you, there were no romantic gestures or heartfelt confessions; you simply belonged to him, and you need to get used to it.

Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

Of course, Dean treats you differently compared to others. He’s less rough around the edge, and he does try to control his temper better around you. You’re his, and he doesn’t mistreat what belongs to him. 

Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

Depending on what you do, however, he'll simply tie you to the bedpost and keep you there until you learn your lesson. He would never intentionally hurt you, but he will force you over your lap and smack your ass until you’re begging for forgiveness. Trust me, he wouldn’t make it fun for you.

Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

The better question is: how many rights would he allow you to have? All you need to do around him is eat, sleep, and look pretty for him. Misbehave, and you’re going to be chained to the bed again.

Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

He will have zero patience with you, so you better behave for your own sake. He's not afraid of punishing you, however he sees fit, because you didn’t listen to him or try to escape. Therefore, try not to upset him too much.

Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

No, he would never move on. If you died or were killed, his rampage would be talked about in Hell for centuries. If you manage to escape, it won’t last long. He’s going to get you back, whatever it takes, so enjoy the freedom while it lasts.

Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

Ha! Hell no. However, after being cured, he will feel horrible for how he treated you. He’ll feel ashamed that his darker feelings for you were brought to light. He really does love you, but the demonic side of him has horrible ways of showing it.

Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

His transformation into a demon allowed his yandere tendencies to be brought to the surface. He doesn’t have to hold back his urges anymore, and why would he want to?

Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

Of course he doesn’t like it; he prefers you being obedient and rather docile. He would never admit this, but he would want you to be happy with him, even as a demon. If you try avoiding him, he’ll keep bugging you and forcing you to talk to him. He lacks patience, so your screams and cries will only make him angrier the longer you keep having tantrums.

Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

Demon Dean would never hurt you intentionally, especially by abusing you to make you cooperate. Sure, when he lashes out, there may be a few accidents, but that’s all they are. Accidents. 

Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

There are two things you could use: his killing urges and/or feeding into his ego. If you want to play the waiting game, you would have to gain his trust enough to allow you to be out of his sight. Simply pretending to love him won’t be enough because he’ll see right through you. When he goes on his killing sprees, leaving you behind for once will be your chance and only chance to escape. You better protect yourself; he will find you.

Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

No matter how much he cares about you, he will hurt your feelings at times, especially when he flirts with other women in front of you. When he’s extremely angry or has the itching need to kill something, you need to stay out of his way. He will lash out at you with hurtful words and potential bruises.

Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

Demon Dean cares about you despite who he is, and he doesn’t like upsetting you. You’re not much fun with tears in your eyes. As a demon, you’re the only one that makes him feel things—feelings he used to hide within when he was human. Anyway, he would go to the ultimate length to win you over. He’s not going to beg on his knees for your love, but he’ll show you how much he worships you in his own way. You want him to kill someone and bring you their head? He'll do it.

Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

After Dean became a demon and left with Crowley, he didn’t take you with him at the time, no matter how much he wanted to. However, you’ve never left his thoughts, no matter how much he tried to drink your sweet voice away. You haunted him for months until he finally snapped and came after you.

Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

If Dean was never cured or you never managed a way to escape from him, he’ll find a way to break you and make you depend solely on him. Make you finally see that he is the only thing that would kill to keep you safe. One way or another, he’ll make you fall for him.

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