#we should all say thank you Adaine

[feelingtheaster99]

Oh damn K2 allows Kristen to concentrate on THREE spells at once, that’s gonna come in CLUTCH

[cookies-over-yonder]

the ballad of an (un)diagnosed private investigator

In junior year, Riz is finally forced to face one of his worst enemies yet—an undiagnosed anxiety disorder threatening to compromise his grades, his relationships, and, most of all, his sanity.

chapter 1 | 2 | 3 | ?

Chapter 2 Summary:

Riz initiates an impromptu sleepover.

ao3

Sklonda has been sitting alone on the couch for hours with dried tears stuck to her face.

She checks the time on her crystal.

11pm.

Just as she's about to get up and go get Riz, because he's certainly worked himself into a frenzy, she gets a notification.

Riz: sleeping over at mordred tonight. love you

-

Ma: Love you too, hon. We're talking about this tomorrow.

Riz cringes at his crystal, and then turns it off. He takes a deep breath in and out, and then, instead of knocking or, gods forbid, ringing the bell, he texts Adaine that he's here.

When the door opens, he's relieved to see her face.

"Is your dad home?" he asks quietly, walking inside.

"He's upstairs, why?"

"No reason."

They get to her tower, and Riz flops onto the bed, burying his face in the mattress.

"Are you okay, man?" Adaine asks, sitting next to him. "I'm always down for an impromptu sleepover, but you don't seem well."

"I think I'm in a fight with my mom," Riz mumbles into her blanket.

He feels a hand on his back.

"When's the last time you ate?" Adaine asks.

"I had a granola bar this morning...?" Riz says, turning around to face her. I was making lunch with Mom earlier, but..."

He cringes.

"Then you fought?"

"No—uh, it doesn't matter. I'm not hungry, okay?"

Adaine is grabbing his hand and leading him back downstairs despite his protests in an instant.

He's sitting at the kitchen counter with a cup of tea—not coffee—as she digs through the fridge when he hears someone descending the steps.

Riz stares at the mug in his hand, and when he notices the slight tremble, he shuts his eyes.

"Hey, Riz!" Jawbone says, and he opens his eyes and forces himself to look up from the drink. "How you doing, kiddo?" Jawbone asks, not in the light conversation way, but in the I know something is wrong way.

"I'm fine, Jawbone," he says flatly.

"I heard you were sleeping over," he says, and Riz shoots a look to Adaine, who promptly shakes her head. "Your mom told me," Jawbone clarifies, having watched this exchange.

"Right. Of course she did," Riz says, taking a sip of tea. "I'm fine," he adds, trying and failing to tone down his agitation.

Riz watches Jawbone's gaze flicker to his trembling hands, then back up to meet his eyes.

"Well, alright, kid, but if you ever want to talk about anything, I'm here. You kids want me to order a pizza? I think Fig and Kristen might be asleep already, but I already know what flavours they'd pick."

"Sure," Adaine says.

Riz takes another sip of tea, and then puts down the cup.

He listens and nods along half-heartedly as Jawbone orders the pizza and asks for input. Once he leaves the room, Riz lets out a sigh of relief and rests his head on the counter's surface.

"I have never seen you that on edge around Jawbone before," Adaine says. "What's going on, Riz?"

Riz keeps his head on the counter, because he feels tears welling up, and he can't help but let them fall.

"I really, really don't want to talk about it."

"Okay," Adaine says, and he hears her summon her familiar.

He lifts his head to make sure she isn't feeling too anxious, but to his surprise, she puts Boggy in his arms.

"Uh—"

"You seemed stressed," she says.

"Yeah. Uh. Thanks."

Adaine keeps staring at him, like she's studying his every movement.

He squirms a little under her gaze.

"So, uh—" he clears his throat, "the pizza will be here in like fifteen, right?"

"Yeah."

"And then we should go to bed, 'cause, we have school...?"

Riz doesn't remember what day it is, but it's more likely to be a weekday tomorrow than it is to be a weekend. Statistically.

"It's Saturday night, dude."

"Right. I knew that. And it's... May."

"June."

"I was close though, wasn't I?" Riz jokes, hoping to lighten the mood.

It doesn't seem to work.

"I'm fine, Adaine," he says, before she even says what's written on her face.

"You need sleep."

"I slept for like... six hours earlier today, actually."

She raised her eyebrows.

"What?" he asks.

"You worry me, Riz."

Riz frowns.

"I'm just a little stressed, okay?" he says. "It's normal. I'm handling it. And you don't need to worry."

He hands Boggy back to her and gets off the chair. "Lets go hang out at the couch or something while we wait."

They settle on the couch, and Adaine wraps an arm around Riz, pulling him close. She's not verbally fretting over him anymore, but the tension could still be cut with a knife, and he feels it like an indomitable weight in his chest.

He takes in a breath and lets it out slowly as he turns on his crystal, hoping for a distraction.

Upon unlocking it, the first thing he sees is the message from his mom.

He cringes, turns it off, shuts his eyes, and relaxes—to the best of his ability—into Adaine's side.

Love you too, hon. We're talking about this tomorrow.

[verosvault]

🚨SPOILERS FOR FANTASY HIGH JUNIOR YEAR EPISODE 7🚨

Dimension20 "Fantasy High Junior Year"

Episode 7 "Stress Tested"

Timestamp: 00:18:36

Video Length: 1min. & 53sec.

Kipperlilly's Food Trucks crossing into Bad Kids territory 😭✋

Gorgug: "They have shrimp burritos" 😭✋

Brennan: *laughs* "Gorgug!" 😂😂

Kristen: "You already went out?!"

Gorgug: "I walked out."

Murph: "Oh, you turncoat."

Kristen also calls Gorgug a turncoat! 😂

Fig: "I should get a bite of it to make sure it's not poison." *takes a bite*

Kristen: "Is that a shrimp taco?"

Brennan: "This is the best...

Gorgug: "Now it's all lopsided."

Brennan: "No roll necessary, one of the best shrimp burritos you've ever had."

Adaine: "I gotta say, like, look, she knows that shrimp is our bit, right?"

Fabian: "Oh, definitely moving in on our shrimp territory." 😭✋

Adaine: "That's like our branding, right?"

Ally: "Were we ever able to check all of the video footage at Fabian's house to see if she was ever at the party?"

Brennan: "Oh, Kipperlilly? That is something that you can absolutely do as a Mystery roll during downtime."

Ally: "Okay. Okay, cool."

Brennan: "For sure."

Fig: "Do you guys think that I could get away with just throwing off a quick Hex on Kipperlilly?"

Adaine: "If you could see her."

Fig: "'Cause I do-"

Adaine: "I think she's wandering around invisible."

Fig: "I could do an eight hour Hex on Charisma then she will be rolling with disadvantage on all of her campaigning."

Brennan: "As you say, 'I'm sure she's invisible,' you hear on a old sort of bullhorn outside,"

Kipperlilly: "Thank you, everyone. Thank you one and all for coming."

Brennan: "And you see Kipperlilly on top of a little platform. She's got a little sash on that says, "Presidential Candidate." And there's a little sort of confetti going around. You see Mary Ann Skuttle is out next to her, just sort of like silently handing out flyers to people as they walk over to the food trucks."

Fig: "That Mary Ann."

Gorgug hates Mary Ann 💀

Fig: "You say the word, I'll hex her. But I'm also cool to just play this..."

Kristen: "All right, how about we take the high road and we all walk out there as a group and we each get something to eat and we smile. And we're just like, 'What a lovely thing they've brought.' With like a little smile on our face that's like, 'This is kinda trying pretty hard, right? But I'm gonna enjoy it.'"

Gorgug: "They go truck. We don't give a ****." 😭✋

Kristen: "I love that, Gorgug."

Fabian: "There it is. They are good though. They're really good."

Kristen: "Yeah? Okay. I can't wait to have one. If I'm being honest, I skipped breakfast. I'm so ****ing hungry."

Adaine: "And they have a cottage cheese truck as well."

Kristen: *gasps* "What?!"

Fabian: "Oh!"

Adaine: "I'm gonna get in there."

[magical-girl-coral]

I'm stuck in a shitty writer's block with my main project so here's a snippet of an AU where Adaine and Oisin meet on the first day of school

Adaine was trying her best to move through the halls silently as possible, looking down on her feet to avoid making eye contact with anyone around her in case another fight broke out. She already stuck out well enough thanks to her uniform she is forced to wear and the orb her father had given her, she doesn't need to accidentally grab the wrong sort of attention on the first day of school.

Someone was giggling as she walked by. She felt a painful squeeze in her chest and downcast her eyes.

Just keep your head down. Just keep your head down. Just keep your head down. Just keep your head down-

Her head ended up colliding with someone's skull, making her fall on the ground and drop her orb along with her glasses as the sounds of books cluttering echoed, something she should have seen coming with the choices she had made. She searched on the ground for her frames, and felt a sense of panic when the temples missing.

"I think you're holding my glasses," the person she bumped into said, "and I think I have yours. Mind switching with me?"

"Y-yeah," Adaine stuttered like an idiot. "Sorry, and thank you."

"Don't mention it."

Adaine put her glasses back on, and gasped at the sight of the stranger in front of her.

He was a dragonborn, around her height with yellow silted eyes and beautiful blue scales. They were in different shades across his arms, and with how the shined thanks to the highlights, Adaine could have sworn they looked exactly like-

"Sapphires."

Adaine choked on her spit. "What?" Did she say that out loud?

The dragonborn blushed and scrambled to his feet. "Nothing! I said nothing!" He awkwardly dusted his pants and reached out his hand. "He-here. Let me help you up."

Adaine gingerly took his offer, and fixed her skirt when she stood on her own again. "Thank you, again. My name is Adaine."

"Oisin," the dragonborn answered with a shy grin. "And don't mention it, again."

Adaine smiled. She glanced at the book that fell next to them. "Conjuration? Are you a wizard too?"

"Huh?" Oisin blinked at her, at the book at the ground, and picked it up with a swift. "Y-yeah. It's been a pretty big obsession of mine since I was a kid. Are you divination?"

"The orb is pretty telling isn't it?" Adaine tried to joke. When Oisin laughed, she felt herself blush. "If we end up in the same class, maybe we can end up being study buddies."

"Study buddies," Oisin repeated into the air. "I think I'd like that."

Adaine felt herself getting giddier by the second. Maybe this place wouldn't be so bad after all.

[highfiveheroes]

ooooh the prompts...."recline" for ivy and oisin, mayhaps?

IVY AND OISIN MY BEST FRIEND TO LOVERS AGENDA IS BEING SPREAD thank you for this

-

Senior year is a bitch.

Ivy is drowning. There’s no way around it. She’s got her head buried in her hands as she stares—why does being a ranger require so much math? Is she supposed to be running calculations on the fly? What angle she needs to hold her bow? She’ll never be able to do that the way they’re describing, and it’s driving her fucking nuts—

A hand shakes her chair a little. She groans, taking her headphone out without turning around. "What is it, Heath?"

"Wrong house."

She glances over her shoulder, and—right. She’s not at home. She’s at Oisin’s, because he has a study he lets her borrow when she’s extra stressed. This must count. "Hey, Oisin."

He smiles, leaning over the back of the chair. His glasses are crooked, she notes with disgusting fondness. "Math?"

"It’s always fucking math," she agrees, leaning back. When she looks up, their noses are nearly touching. She smiles on instinct. "Any way I could convince you to—"

"No."

"Please?"

"I’m already doing Adaine’s math work," Oisin explains. "But I can keep you company."

Right. The Adaine of it all. Ivy’s mood sours a little, but she looks away to keep it from Oisin. "I’d like company," she confesses. "If you want this chair I can—"

She’s startled when Oisin waves his fingers and enlarges the chair, then slides into place next to her. "We can both have the chair."

She stares at him, then looks away when she feels her cheeks begin to turn red. "Oh. Alright. Cool."

Ivy and Oisin have been best friends for ages. They have years of inside jokes under their belts, secrets shared that will go to their graves, and they watched each other die—first Ivy watching Oisin, then Oisin watching Ivy. There are bonds there that can’t be broken. But there are also boundaries they haven’t crossed yet, ones Ivy doesn’t know if she’ll ever be brave enough to breach, and one of them is Oisin’s inherent need to touch everyone he cares about. She’s seen it with his family, how he avoids even basic hugs from the little kids, the way he ducks out of reach when someone tries to clap his shoulder or touch his arm, but his older sister, when she’s home, gets all Oisin’s attention, nearly turning him into a lapdog. Adaine is getting that treatment too now, especially now that they’re committed—not dating, as Oisin has so clearly pointed out, but he’s wanted it for so long that Ivy knows it’s only a matter of time before they make it official, given that Adaine is finally doing more than just giving him the time of day lately.

Still, he sits in the chair next to her, a hair too close, and she’s taken aback when he slides an arm around her shoulders and sticks his chin where he can see over her shoulder. He’s very warm. It’s all the scales, she thinks.

"What are you doing?" she asks, voice steady even as her heartbeat goes crazy.

"I’m gonna keep you company," he says, his eyes scanning the paper. He points at the next question. "That’s seventeen degrees, by the way."

She stares at him a little, then reads the question. "That would have taken me an hour to figure out."

"Well, no need to waste an hour then. Just put the answer down."

"I have to show my work."

He shifts them, and then their bodies are pressed completely against each other. There’s a vibration in his chest that almost feels like the purring of a cat. He’s smirking at the paper, doubly so when he snatches the pen from her hand and starts to scribble down an explanation. "Alright, fine. I’ll show my work."

She relaxes back into the touch, fighting back a yawn. "You’re a good friend."

The vibrations hitch for a moment; when they restart, they’re lower this time. "I know," he says easily.

"Your handwriting is shit."

"Thanks. It’s cause I died."

"It was shit before you died, actually."

Banter is easy. And if she leans a little more into his touch than she should, who’s to say?

[kipperlillyforpresident]

Can I say that I think one of the problems with this season is that it's not about confronting the rage inside you? That's what the villains are about. But it's not been a part of the Bad Kids story at all. At any point. We get the opposite with Gorgug, where he's being encouraged to embrace and balancing his rage in order to grow (which gets even weirder when Porter turns out to be the villain, undercutting basically the one actual character arc that happened this season.) And there's been no other interest in or investment in rage around any other character. Their character development hooks (to the extent that they have them) are all about stress and preparing for the real world. The problem Riz gets confronted with over and over this season is the possibility that his friends aren't as invested in their relationship as he is. The problem Fig encounters is a problem of identity and coping with expectations. Fabain's problem is around loneliness. Kristen's is taking responsibility. Adaine's is navigating the world from a radically changed position. None of the actual problems intended to provoke growth that the characters were confronted with have anything to do with rage. Honestly, even Gorgug's problem only involved rage once Porter got involved, originally his problem was also about identity.

Now, I still think they dodged dealing with those problems too and none of the character's really grew this season. But I think the problem with the Rat Grinder's is that there is a fundamental disconnect between what the villain is doing and who the characters are. And that's kind of makes sense. Character arcs shouldn't respond to the villain. At least, not in an ongoing story like this, a good villain should be created to interfere with who the characters are/want to be. It made sense for the American Dream to be the villain in Unsleeping City because all of the characters had direct ties to striving for that dream. It made sense for The Authors to be the villain in Neverafter because all the characters were struggling with aspects of self-determination and free will. It made sense for The Nightmare King to be the villain in SY because all the characters were asked to confront their fears. At no point, were the character's storylines other than Gorgug this year about confronting rage and violence. And, frankly, I don't think they should have been because it's not a character arc that works particularly well for these characters or for this world (a world where brutal violence is encouraged, characters who have never seen their anger as a problem.) The original character prompts were much better than rage focus. But because they wanted to make Porter the villain, literally just for the bit, the whole thing turned into a thematic mess.

Sorry for the block of text. I've been trying to work out why I agree with so many of the Rat Grinder fans' general complaints but disagree with the specifics of a lot of their criticism. And I think this is it

do NOT apologize anon!! I always appreciate analytical asks like this - and I'm glad that even non-TRG stans find my blog interesting enough to share their thoughts like this.

I think this is... a really REALLY smart ask. It's an incredibly good framework for analyzing why so many people are upset by this season.

And, frankly, I don't think they should have been because it's not a character arc that works particularly well for these characters or for this world (a world where brutal violence is encouraged, characters who have never seen their anger as a problem.)

I think this part of your ask really hits the nail on the head. Because you're right! Brutal violence is seen as bad when the enemies do it, because that's a nominal theme of the season. But when the protagonists have to get to work, it's back to the status quo, and brutality is once again just a fact of life.

I'm going to be chewing on this ask for a while. Thanks for sending it!

[fabrizqueersubtext]

Who could care about me?

For SJ! Thank you-- your donation will be sent to the Palestinian Social Fund.

Prompt: the bad kids, mordred manor, group hangout

You mentioned not being pressed for details, so I moved it to Riz's office between S1 and S2. I hope you don't mind!

You can read all of the collection here: https://archiveofourown.org/collections/Kofi4ACause Request a fic at Kofi4ACause: https://ko-fi.com/omgpourquoi

TW: Disassociation/Derealization but his friends show up to help!

---

Riz Gukgak isn’t one to rest on a case. He’s not even sure what that means, actually. He’s staring at his case board, red string blurring together to the point he wonders if he should start again with a new color. Maybe a gray?

He’s been locking himself in his new office as much as his mom will let him get away with and drinking coffee as fast as he can make it. Once he had gotten his murder board through the door, the Nightmare Crown theft consumed him fully; even when he was away from the board, he was thinking about it. It was easier to just stay here with the board. The thing is that he's close. He’s so close— he must be. It’s been a little over a month since the Nightmare Crown went missing from Principal Aguefort's office during the fight. He’s still trying to connect its theft to the last case. To Kalvaxus. To the Seven. To the Abernants. To Aguefort. There’s something he’s missing, though, there must be something else—

His thought is interrupted by a loud banging on the door. In a second, he's up from the desk, goblin ears pinning back to his head with a hiss, gun pointed towards the door. There's another banging.

“The Ball, open the door,” comes the muffed voice of Fabian Aramais Seacaster from the other side. Riz realizes the banging must be Fabian's version of a knock. 

Riz takes a breath, trying to regulate his racing heart. He slowly replaces his gun in its holster. Apparently, though, he's not moving fast enough for his friends, because he hears an impatient sigh that can only belong to Fig.

“Move over, I’ll just kick it down,” he hears Fig offer.

It’s enough to get him moving towards them. He likes his door as it is, without Fig's bootprints on the front.

"I'm coming, don't break your foot or my door," he says as he drags himself away from his desk to unlock the door. It flies open to reveal his friends. And not just Fabian and Fig but Gorgug, Kristen, and Adaine as well. They’re dressed like it's warm outside and vaguely he remembers that it is summer.

The stand there and look at him blankly for a moment, before Fabian break the silence. "Oh, uh— we brought Chinese food?” 

Just before Gorgug asks, "Are you okay?" 

Both of them are outshined by Kristen though who, at the same time, raises her arms and yells, “This is an intervention!"

"Um," Riz doesn't know what to say. He settles on an answer to all three, "Okay."

They push past and pile into his small office without invitation. Suddenly, Riz feels tired. His legs are aching and his face feels sweaty and his head hurts. Gorgug pushes his old pizza boxes into the trash so that he can sit in the chair they’d been occupying. Kristen pulls the blinds and opens the window, letting in a light breeze. Vaguely, he wonders what time it is. He’s startled to realize he hasn’t had that thought for days.

"Hi, Riz. We're here for lunch," Adaine says, as she reaches forward to places a hand on his shoulder. Lunch. Huh, so it must be around noon. He feels the familiar rush of her magic, like summer rain and the faint smell of a library. His clothes unrumple, his face ungreases, his hair feels clean and he feels more present than he has in weeks.

"The Ball, we got you chow mein," Fabian says, pulling out boxes and placing them wherever he can find a spot on the desk.

Fig leans over and pushes some of the files and post-its off the desk and to the floor. Before he can protest, Kristen plops down into his desk chair and grins at him.

"It really is a nice office," she says, spinning in his desk chair.

Beside him, Gorgug lifts up a plastic bag.

"I bought a Cola, but, uh, we thought you should drink water. So-," Gorgug says, shoving a water bottle into his hand.

"Oh. Okay," Riz says, taking a sip. Someone hands him his food, he takes a bite and his stomach growls. Huh, when did he get hungry?

He looks at his friends, who've come into his office, interrupting his investigative brooding and taken up all his space. They're infuriating and chaotic and loud and overwhelming and here. They’re here.

Riz feels like he’s coming back from the dead. They sit in various part of the office, eating Chinese food and bickering about how much coffee is actually too much coffee. Riz just listens. He eats. He drinks. It feels like he's settling back into his skin. Into himself. Eventually, as always, they turn back to the case.

"Okay, what'd we got?" Fig asks as she kicks at his board. It rattles from the force, shaking all of his string. The vibrating strings look a lot like his brain feels, shaky and uncertain. Although, he is starting to feel better. More like their Riz, the Riz he is actually starting to like to be, instead of a hyper-fixated goblin in his room all alone. 

"You know, I think we need a new perspective. New string," Adaine says. She reaches in her jacket, which is currently tied around her waist, and pulls out a fresh ball of string. It's gray.

With a sudden clarity, Riz realizes that his friends are, each in their own ways, caring for him. Riz Gukgak isn't used to being cared for. He's usually the one doing the caring. Sometimes he thinks he cares so much that it'll kill him. Sometimes he hopes it does.

But his friends are here. They're here and they care. They think he is worth caring for.

Thinking about it, he gets a little choked up and has to drink more water to cover it up. Then he actually does choke. Fabian moves to his side and pats his back a little too hard. 

"Breathe, the Ball. Dying from drinking water would be a stupid way to die," he says. 

"Yeah, you have to die in a cool way," Kristen chimes in. 

He lets out about little cough and air returns to him. He turns back to his friends and they look at him expectedly. Right.

"Here's where we are-" he starts.

[ruby-red-inky-blue]

Carrie watches: Not All Who Wanda Are Lost

gonna keep a running list of episode highlights again because nobody i know irl watches Fantasy High ¯\_ (ツ)_/¯

Riz and his folders :( he made one for Adaine for fun! That just says Hey Adaine! And Adaine is so delighted with the organisation <3

Murph getting a 30 trying to put his character's friends through school is so incredibly on brand

that school for lone adventurers did break my heart a little actually (as per the AP that one's on Murph and I am the opposite of surprised)

but their one-man bloodrush team was a hilarious bit

Ally going "no she can try to persuade me and in fact I will give her the help action because Kristen actually does know she should go to class" is incredible and speaks to me so deeply rn

"fluffier than my shirt?!"

Brennan immediately improvising a pseudo-deep health podcast when Kristen plugs the AUX in

Gorgug's humunculus. Just. Zac. It's molting because he ran out of time to add feathers?? and then it has the stupidest name?? and it's both impressive and also probably not as smart as it could be? and it can fly but like. barely? and it has super sharp claws but tries to sit on his head??

I went to school with some rich-ish boys and them nearly starving in front of a fully stocked kitchen is a joke I've made about them so many times, Fabian is On Brand as hell

the manic glint in Murph's eyes when Riz and Adaine start aggressively reverse-psychology-ing Fig out of her self-sabotage makes me wonder if that's not an approach he has at least considered many a time irl

(In response to the name Kipperlilly Copperkettle) "What are you, like, four different dogs? Just a white family's fleet of dogs?" SAVAGE. no survivors.

Riz noticing and cringing at people hyping up Gilear as a bit instead of out of genuine affection is so tragic and also so tragically what high school is *like* for people like him (cf: me).

obsessed with the whole student government storyline, they were MADE for this

the Axmurph household solidarity between Fig supporting Riz in his hyper cringe attempt to rebrand the Bad Kids to the PhotosyntheKids and Riz getting immediately so offended on Fig's behalf because another bard at school got famous for their music. Like. You know. That thing bards do.

Ah Brennan, I see what you're doing with Gorgug. It hurts me but I get it. Poor kid.

That whole interaction between Riz and Jawbone. Incredible. "I wouldn't." "Okay, I put it back."

"do we maybe see something of ourselves and don't like it or...?"

Brennan just metaphorically grabbing both Riz and Murph by the shoulders and shaking them. Hey buddy. Can we think about this. And Riz and Murph so deliberately going. No. No we can't. Because everything is truly so fine. Stress is good and we're doing so good thank you byeee! And Emily cackling in the background.

Riz as Kristen's campaign manager?? yes please and thank you

Kristen and her family. EEEeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Oh no. Oh no no no.

"We tried to tell the postman to bring your mail to Mordred Manor, 'cause you don't live here no more, and he told us we were bigots and fascists and that our reign would crumble so I don't know what that meant -" gotta love Bud Cubby. A real one.

Kristen doing something so out of pocket that Brennan imposes disadvantage on insight for her parents permanently, incredible

Adaine... no no nooo too real too real this is so sad. My poor girl :(

"No I guess I just... Wanda'd in" yeah this is a solid part two to Hilda Hilda. Brownie points for the weirdly aggro secret service agent with the missing persons case from 22 Hilda Blvd. (I do so love it when you can *hear* the DM yelling ENDING THE BIT THIS IS THE END OF THE BIT without actually saying that, it's so funny everytime)

The combined exasperation from Ally and Murph at Fig's school skipping antics is so funny. Like Siobhan is invested in this as Adaine, but Ally and Murph seem so personally invested, it's hilarious.

Incredible pull on the title pun by Zac as always, I can't believe this didn't get Brennan more.

The reactions around the table to Kristen awkwardly describing Tracker are impeccable.

oooh. oooh the bitch is back. I love that actually.

[hyperfixationspam]

fantasy high characters as things i've heard at school (from teachers and students)

Fig: Yeah, I used to be a hoe back in the day.

Fabian: All the girls want me for my money. I take you on a date, I buy you a gumball.

Fig: Kristen's a big lesbian, I'm a big bi, Fabian's a big... uh... whore?

Adaine: It's horrible here. Everyone's gay and it smells bad.

Goldenhoard: You're going to detention. | Fig: Oooh, cute!

Riz: On a scale from one to ten, ten being the dumbest a person can possibly look, I'm a nineteen.

Fig: Just because anal is my catchphrase doesn't mean I like to do it.

Kristen: Hey, you want a condom? | Fabian: (through tears) Yeah.

Tracker: Kristen jokes about wanting to lose her virginity in a Walmart but she says it so much that it's kind of worrying.

Gorgug: I asked what a bukkake was and Jawbone came up and explained it to me.

Fabian: I thought you got an Apple and I was really proud of you but then I realized it was an Android and you're poor.

Bill: Hey! No sex in this household if you're not wearing full armor!

Fabian: There's no one here that I like. | Riz: I am sitting RIGHT next to you.

Ragh: I punch furries and minorities, and you're a double whammy.

Fig: Principal Aguefort lowkey has a handsome energy.

Fabian: I was in the middle of beating my meat and my battery died. | Riz: The battery in your dick??

Fig: If this school burns down, I'll be over here roasting marshmallows.

Gorgug: What would happen I call girls oatmeal? | Kristen: You'd get all the girls.

Fabian: If the vice principal's in prison, we're legally allowed to leave.

Riz: Aguefort is NOT a twink, he's a twunk at best.

Fig: (winks) That was a threat!

Gorgug: You won't find anything dirty in my search history, all you'll find is Japanese dubs of Phineas and Ferb.

Torek: I fucking hate this school. So many fake skaters.

Kristen: Riz! Stop biting the condom box!

Fabian: I can only listen to Oh No! by Marina and the Diamonds, any other music makes me physically sick.

Riz: My mom asked me what I want for my birthday and I don't know how to tell her I want a Spiderman costume.

Fig: I drew fanart of Coach Daybreak as a long furby and he threatened to kill me.

Gilear: People judge me for drinking too much diet soda but at least I don't do meth.

Kristen: He's not hot, he just has a leather jacket.

Fig: Everyone's first crush was on a Creepypasta character. | Adaine: Your experiences are NOT universal.

Gorgug: Oh, my single brain cell is TWEAKING right now.

Kristen: The answer is 69 but Biz wouldn't know that because virginity rocks.

Fig: My teacher kicked me out of class because he couldn't handle my energy.

Kristen: (chanting) KILL THE CHURCH! KILL THE CHURCH! KILL THE CHURCH!

Fig: Tieflings are a gateway drug to more tieflings.

Riz: I drink protein drinks! | Fabian: Oh, cool, what kind? | Riz: Um. Nesquik.

Adaine: I did bad on my test so now I have to listen to the entire Steven Universe soundtrack.

Fabian: (coughs up blood) That's from all the bad vibes at this school.

Riz: Hey, if I ate this rock, what diseases would I get?

Fig: Sometimes I forget how white Kristen is and then she does that little wave at me.

Kristen: I fuck Helioic girls until they're not Helioic anymore.

Fig: I just wish I could see Satan's face.

Fabian: I think we should restart the trend of shoving nerds in lockers, starting with Riz.

Riz: Stop staring at me and do your work. I'm not an attraction. I'm just a kid eating paper.

Aguefort: Don't wander around the hallways or the drug dealers will get you!

Fig: I'm having a crisis! No, I will not elaborate!

Ragh: Freshie is a slur.

Riz: If I had magic I would probably set my balls on fire.

Adaine: This class is singlehandedly making my hair go gray.

Ragh: Hey, do you mind if I beat your ass?

Kristen: Lift your head up, queen, your strap is falling.

Riz: Ew, I don't want your lice. My lice are fine on their own, thank you very much.

Kristen: God blocked me on Facebook.

Gorgug: Wait, pineapples are real?

Kristen: I'm trying to convert her to lesbianism. She's already a liberal so it shouldn't be hard.

Gorgug: Do you ever just wanna like... kill people? | Kristen: ...No?

Fig: Dude, are you watching porn? | Fabian: No! It's hentai!

Adaine: My sister asked me if she should get a tattoo of baby Yoda?

Riz: Someone offered to give me a stick and poke and I was too scared to say no so I have a tattoo now, I guess.

Gilear: I just don't understand why people are attracted to foxes.

Adaine: Well, I'm traumatized. | Jawbone: Noooo, don't do that!

Fabian: Good news, everyone! My fish died.

Ragh: It's like when you level up in a mobile game, except I leveled up to homosexuality.

Gorgug: The door's locked. | Riz: Only if you don't believe in yourself!

Sklonda: I'm concerned for your health and safety. | Riz: I don't have health or safety.

Adaine: Capitalism isn't a cult. | Fig: Money cult. | Adaine: Hm. Good point.

Fig: Ugh, I want her to crush my skull like a watermelon. | Adaine: Ayda would never do that! | Fig: Exactly, that's the best part!

Gorgug: Hey, Zelda, you wanna go see the Sonic movie together? We can hold hands during the scary parts.

Fabian: They're old enough to have sex, they're like 10.

Gorgug: I have a science question. How do the fish in Spongebob have a swimming pool if they live underwater? | Adaine: Spongebob's not real.

Adaine: And guess what lives in my backpack? My computer. | Ayda: Aww, I thought you were gonna say a small frog.

Fig: Someone needs to tell Aguefort that his teachers are wilin.

Gilear: I might be hungover on Wednesday but we'll power through it.

Kristen: I hate gay people because all my problems were caused by a gay person. It's me, but still.

Gorgug: I can't wait to go back to real school and get bullied.

Fig: Ooh, you practice Satanism? That's so poggers.

Fabian: You're all just Rally's fry crumbs to me.

Fig: If you have chemistry class, just leave. You don't need that kind of toxicity in your life.

Jawbone: Nooo, you don't suck! Unless you want to.

Adaine: It is shocking that people are still ignorant to racism just because they don't experience it firsthand. | Fabian: Yeah, anyway, y'all hear about Kanye cheating on Kim with Jeffree Star?

Aguefort: When I was your age, we attacked each other in person like civilized people!

Riz: Oh my god. The school is selling students on the dark web!

Fig: You should go to Build-a-bear! | Gilear: I think if I went to Build-a-bear alone I would get put on an FBI watchlist.

Riz: I forgot to take my antidepressants but I've had a coffee and two donuts so that's almost the same thing!

Fig: Goldenrod is my poor little meow meow.

Riz: Someone called me kawaii, I hate it here.

Adaine: Our lives aren't interesting enough for Aguefort to be in the mafia.

Kristen: Gilear is only slightly dilfy.

Gilear: Can you stop talking about the Aguefort hoes? I'm not interested.

Adaine: I like your egg earrings! | Ayda: THANKS THEY'RE EGGCELLENT. (exhale) Oh thank god, I've been waiting to say that all day.

Adaine: WHY WOULD YOU ERASE THE FROG YOU MURDERER??

Gilear: This yogurt tastes like my desire to kill myself.

Fabian: I'm NOT on crack, I'm just in sports mode.

Ragh: I'm gonna go home and do manly stuff. Like cower in pain.

Fig: Everyone here is bad at their job but I still respect them.

Gorgug: I'm a gamer! I play rock paper scissors.

Kristen: Uh oh, my lesbian's getting out of control. I might have to neuter her.

Jawbone: You're only tired because of capitalism. | Fabian: Could you elaborate on that? | Jawbone: I could.

Kristen: That wasn't very gender sexuality alliance of you.

Gorgug: I don't like insulting people. If I want to hurt someone, I'll just murder them.

Ragh: I have so much brawling to do.

Fabian: It's not that I don't hit women, I just don't hit lesbians because I know they'll beat the shit out of me.

Adaine: Forgiveness is not an option, but death is.

Riz: You called my mom a milf! | Fig: Well, what was I supposed to do? Lie?

Helio: That is an excellent question which I will not be answering.

Adaine: The librarian scares me. I feel like she would punch me without remorse.

Fabian: He's the Jack to my Rose but in a bromance way.

Kristen: If God loves me, I'll do good on this test.

Adaine: I'm not a big fan of trespassing. | Fig: Why not? It's so much fun!

Goldenhoard: Trust me, if I was racist, I would have called you a slur a long time ago.

Gorgug: Wow, this song is... bonkers.

Fig: I could never work in customer service. Like "oh have a nice day!" Gross. I could never.

[creacherkeeper]

IM AWARE ITS A LOWBALLER BUT “Just look at me. Forget everything else.” ABERNANT SISTERS

The TV droned at the edges of Adaine's hearing. She puttered around the kitchen, not paying it much mind. It sounded like the news, which she knew, as the Oracle, she should probably watch, but having grown up in a 'news only' media household, she never did. It was probably Sandra Lynn, catching up on the state of Solace before she left on her next work trip. Jawbone never liked her to have it on when the kids were around, but the bickering they did about was, for the most part, mild. Adaine gathered her little fruit slices and toasted bread for her late-night snack, starting to feel the fuzziness of sleep herself.

In the living room, a cup shattered.

Adaine was in the doorway in an instant, a counterspell buzzing at her fingers. Her heart pounded, but even with darkvision, she didn't see any sort of threat. The room was quiet besides the TV, and empty besides her sister. Aelwyn's mug sat in three pieces on the ground, tea leaking across the floorboards. Her hands were over her mouth as she stared at the screen.

"Aelwyn?"

In the silence, her focus shifted.

"Scouting trips into the former forest of the Nightmare King continue, with yesterday's team making yet another shocking discovery. Former Fallinel ambassador Angwyn Abernant's body was recovered by the team, still preserved but seemingly dead for some time. The cause of death appears to be a serious skull fracture, perhaps attained by--"

Adaine raised the remote and hit the power. Silence rang through the room.

She swallowed. "You shouldn't be watching that."

Her sister did not respond, nor move, nor breathe.

Adaine shifted the large shards of mug away with her shoe and crouched down in front of her. Hands still over her mouth, Aelwyn's eyes looked glassy and far away.

"Aelwyn?" she asked quietly. When her sister didn't respond, she tentatively put a hand on her knee.

Aelwyn flinched. Her eyes closed as tears began to pour from them.

"Hey," Adaine said, "it's okay."

"It's not," she responded, muffled.

"It is. He's dead, and he doesn't matter anymore."

With a gaspy breath, Aelwyn dropped her hands, and Adaine took them. She didn't look at her, just stared off into a corner of the room.

"Is it--" Her face pinched. "Is it stupid I'm still afraid of him? I always have been, but I'm still ..."

"It's not stupid. He was a scary man."

"You were never scared of him. But I- I was always so frightened. I always knew I should say something, do something, but--" Her eyes began to look far away again. "The first time I was brave enough to, he nearly- I knew he would kill me. I knew I was dead. And I would have been, if you hadn't--"

"Aelwyn."

Aelwyn stopped.

Adaine squeezed her hands. "Look at me. Forget everything else, just look at me."

Slowly, her sister's eyes slid over.

"Our father," Adaine said, "was a bad man. And now he can't hurt either of us ever again. He never should've in the first place, but now he can't, because he's gone, and he isn't coming back. We're together, and we're safe, and from here on out we have each other's backs. Nothing's gonna touch us as long as we have each other. That's all that matters now. Okay?"

Aelwyn stared at her. She nodded. "Okay."

"Good." Adaine sighed, a little release of tension. "Now, I'm gonna clean this up, and then we can go make some more tea, alright?"

"Adaine?"

"Hm?"

There was a beat of stillness. Then Aelwyn pulled her into a hug.

"Thank you," Aelwyn said, "for saving me. You know from here on, I'm going to do the same."

Adaine hugged her fiercely back.

"Always."

[jq37]

The Report Card – Fantasy High: The Seven Ep 3

Let’s Split Up and Look for Clues! 

Welcome back to the Seven and the Museum of Adventuring. My previous pronouncement of combat was a little premature but hold tight, we’ll get there. For now, we’re back with Antiope who just saw a glimpse of the Ending of Things (aka, Ending) and is freaking out a bit. She tells the others and they all do various checks to see what they can find out.

Ostentatia casts Commune With City and clocks that there is some kind of abjuration shield magic on the government buildings in town, stopping them from being spied on. She also clocks some lingering undead-ish magic and a weird divination effect on Antiope, specifically on the Aguefort logo of her jacket, like someone scryed on her and just got that she had something to do with Aguefort. At this, Penny reminds her that the only true piece of info they gave Ending when they broke her out is that they were from Aguefort.

Sam with a 19 Insight still feels the connection she and Ant have with Ending because of their spells turned against them in the initial encounter. Yelle does a Perception check (27) and once again doesn’t really get bad, dreadful, menacing vibes. But also, she recognizes that she’s chill with a lot of things most people don’t love. 

Antiope reiterates that she texted Charity that she’s interested in the internship so she can learn more info--even better now that they know the buildings are safe from scrying. Yelle remembers Aguefort’s warning about people watching them and Sam asks Zelda if her “weird boyfriend” (“he’s actually really cool”) is friends with the elven oracle. Zelda says yeah, they’re both friends with Adaine, she can ask about any weird divination stuff. Sam makes sure to specify she should look into TK but NOT Ending, no doubt remembering what happened when she tried to do a spell on her. 

It’s been a big day as Zelda says so they all go to the TGIF-esque Slappy McFinnigans to celebrate (which Sam has problems with--the fact that they’re celebrating I mean, but she’s mainly ignored). They’re quickly kicked out because Katja can’t help herself from trying to brush the mane of their centaur server and they reconvene at the more their speed SlamBurger, where a horse can fully destroy a soda machine to absolutely zero reaction.  Zelda says that Ostentatia was right in that they should all do the quest because it doesn’t close any doors and they have the 2 weeks to figure things out. They all seem a bit more on the same page (though Sam is still pretty frosty towards Ant) and start making plans.

Before they leave, Yelle pulls aside Ant and Sam and says hey, first of all, you two are still linked to Ending from before. Second of all, I know y’all are Going Through It right now and you don’t have to talk about it or make up right away but you need to get your heads in the game and you need to know that you’re both loved and still family. 

Penny, Zelda, Katja, and Ostentatia go back to the museum to try and get more information for their quest. Katja goes to the information desk (horse in tow, of course) and just starts asking information about TK. She’s told that she’s one of the museum’s benefactors and has been missing for years, and hey, do you understand that a museum’s info desk is about where the water fountains and exhibits are, not just random information about the world?

Ostentatia bails her out by calling her over so she can do her plan which is just to walk into the back area like she owns the place. Now, Aguefort students do have a certain level of clearance to be back there and she does have her school ID. But instead of explaining that, she tried to use her Earrings of Diamond Charm to charm the employee she runs into which fails. And then she does a pretty good tag-team lie with Katja about how they NEED to pass a class but that doesn’t fly. Then Ostentatia tries flirting which ALSO doesn’t work. Zelda at this point steps in and just headbuts the dude so they can book it away. I personally would have gone with, “Do you know who we are? We killed the dragon that’s your current main exhibit,” but you know. No backseat adventuring. 

While this is happening, Penny is stealthing like a pro, looking for anything Arcana related. Ostentatia and Katja also did checks (O getting a nat 20) and we’ll go through all their info gathered now. 

Katja basically gets info on TK we kind of already knew. She was a benefactor of the museum. She’s centuries old like Aguefort. She was concerned with consciousness and divinity and specifically how will and divine will manifested, as well as elemental magic.  

Ostentatia gets a lot of info with her Nat 20. She gets a full map to the temple where TK went which is called the Temple of Earth Defiant. The point of the temple is that it’s up in the open air and harsh winds--wind being a symbol of chaos and unpredictability to dwarves--but they still use it as a place to honor their heroes and they rebuild and upkeep it despite the erosion and how hard it is to get there. It’s hallowed from evil and lots of stories about it involve heroes racing there for sanctuary. It was made by dwarves but it’s a pilgrimage site for other primordial beings like goliaths and earth genasi (which is what TK is). There are 3 heroes who have big statues here: Asha Hammerheart (a SUPER dope name I must say), Yvonna of the Sundering Hills , and Kora Ironbrow.

Penny finds that, amongst Kalvaxus’s hoard there were 7 unrecovered artifacts--the Mirrors of the Eidolons (which are the smashed mirrors they found it seems). Eidelons are kind of like the elemental plane version of angels/celestials. They’re primordial (remember Katja saw primordial language on the wall of the dragon cave) and kind of aligned with things like titans and genies. Raw element with no agenda (unlike celestials and demons and such which have a clear alignment which makes up the D&D religious system). It is said by wizards--who look at these things in more of a nuts and bolts way than say clerics who take the fuzzier religions view--that Eidolons are the hands of the gods because gods are beings of spirit--how could they form the physical world. Will of the divine manifested by elemental beings? Sounds right up TK’s alley.

Sam decides she’s desperate enough for information that she calls her mom who she is understandably snippy with. Her mom gives her a contact to talk to when she asks about TK but Sam stonewalls her on show business talk. She tries to play the “mother knows best, you’ll thank me later,” in a kind of Gothel-y way while acting like anything in the past never happened and says Sam is attacking her but when Sam accuses her of neglect, she proves her right by hanging up the phone.

Sam then calls the number and it turns out to be Lola Embers (Fig’s agent) who has been waiting for Sam’s call for ages and wants to talk to her, even though she’s currently chasing her dog across the park. She says she met TK once at a genasi woman networking thing and also says she once saw Charity get into an argument with TK over government funding or not getting a grant or something similar. She then says she’s in a lake trying to get her dog and Sam, being a water genasi who can breathe underwater and also a fundamentally good person even though she’s currently being aggro as hell, goes to the park to help her. Lola assures her that if she’s ready, she’ll help her get new acting gigs and that the world is ready for the new her. 

Yelle meanwhile casts Speak With Plants on some trees near TK’s office and, after a super stoner to stoner conversation, gets a magical footprint trail of where she ran off to when she absconded 12 years ago. 

Antiope (who is in a sports bra because she destroyed her top with the Aguefort logo since that’s what was pinged, revealing in a wild, nat-1 fueled retcon that she got a tramp stamp reading “Leader” in the Red Waste) goes to see Charity to fill out some paperwork, ingratiate herself, and perhaps get some info. Charity has her hot, young, assistant (who Antiope is instantly crushing on) give Ant his shirt (and Charity’s lack of surprise at seeing his 4 horses pulling a chariot tattoo makes the group think they’re def banging). She kind of explains what the Ministry does and Antiope boils it down a bit to snitching on other adventurers. Charity says it’s more of a who watches the watchmen situation and visibly twitches when she has to say the word “snitch”. 

When she takes a second to call Antiope’s dad, she accidentally leaves a tab open on her computer which has TK’s file open (probably up from when the Maidens asked about her earlier). Antiope sneaks a peek and learns that the artifact that TK stole is called the Legendarium Extrodia and it tracks quests. It seems that at some point TK must have had top level access to get her hands on it. It also shows that TK was marked for assassination (which seems like a pretty good reason to get the heck out of dodge). Brennan also says she’s learned enough that she can use the L.E. if she finds it. 

At this point, Yelle tells everyone to come back ASAP so they can follow the magic footsteps. Antiope wants to come but doesn’t want to burn bridges with Charity (or chances with Preston--equally important) so she, at Katja’s suggestion--pretends to have diarrhea and is Nat 20 convincing. Interesting choice for the end of the first meeting with a person you’re crushing on. But Preston is actually pretty supportive as she races out the door as fast as possible.

The Seven follow the footsteps out of Solace and it becomes clear that TK was headed to the dwarven temple Ostentatia learned about. This is a multi-day journey so Cinnamon sings a glorious, magical, horse song and summons mounts for everyone which I will now name because this is obviously the most important part of the episode:

Snowfire - Danielle

Taffodill - Sam

Alagonia - Antiope

Candyheart - Penny

Starforge - Ostentatia 

Strawberry Dancer - Zelda 

Crucial info. 

As they travel, Antiope casts Primeval Awareness and gets that there is something ancient in the mountain. They travel through Pilgrim’s Pass (a village area most travelers to the temple pass through) but find it completely razed to the ground. They investigate. 

With an 18 Survival check, Antiope finds tracks that seem halfway between dog and cat. There are more than 4 legs and it’s hard to tell how old they are because there’s not a lot of rain in the area. They could have been left long ago and been undisturbed. Regardless, these are clearly from monstrosities. On a 26 History Check, Katja knows that this area used to be protected by Blink Dogs (teleporting dogs) but they seem to be all gone now. On a 22 Nature check, Yelle sees a weird feather made out of plant material. It seems like fae stuff but bad vibes. On an 18 Insight check, Sam knows this was a purposeful slaughter.

And on Penny’s 30 Arcana check, oh boy. Penny finds broken common scrawled on the wall in human blood talking about a queen of the mountain who rules the skies. That only the queen may see and none may see themselves. And that the people were told to destroy the seeing glass and did not obey. In from of that message is a bear hide covering something magic. Penny lifts it with reckless abandon and sees tons of mirror shards.

Friendship bracelets! She thinks.

Gotcha bitch, the thing in the mirror says.

Uh-oh.   

Penny calls over her friends to let them knows she may have made a tiny mistake. The group is pretty split between, “Understandable,” and “Girl, WHAT?” In her defense, she did try to cast Friends on the person on the other side of the mirror shards but that’s not enough to stop an entire pack of 50-60 Displacer Beast (magic tentacle cats)/Blink Dog hybrid monstrosities along with the Harpy Queen (voice from the mirror) and her plant feathered harpy minions to start rapidly making their way to their location. 

It is at this point that Ostentatia remembers that abominations and monstrosities cannot step into the temple which means it’s time to RUN. 

And NOW it’s combat time. 

The premise of this fight is that the girls are on their horses, moving towards the center of the temple as fast as they can while fending off the closest enemies. I won’t give an exact play by play but the two highlights are as follows:

Yelle conjures up a bunch of geese with raptor stats (...so normal geese) to swarm the head cat/dog abomination and has to do a truly stunning amount of math for which she is rewarded with SEVENTY POINTS OF DAMAGE. 

Antiope does some insane arrow trickery and gets the Queen Harpy in the wing (which Ostentatia helpfully gets on video so she can show Preston later) and then forces her to take damage as she falls. If not for an extremely lucky Box of Doom nat 20, she may have been down for the count. Antiope still comes away with more than FIFTY points of damage on her though. 

And we end the episode mid-combat! We will catch up on our girls next time!

Superlatives 

Penny: Most Likely to Make Friends During a Hostage Situation 

As a companion to Danielle’s superlative last episode, Penny gets this award for reading or misreading every situation as an opportunity to make friends or make friendship bracelets for the ones she already has. 

Random Thoughts

Did you guys notice that with Katja having Cinnamon and Charity’s assistant being Preston, that’s two of the main pet NPCs from A Crown of Candy?

Antiope’s Reaction to Yelle Saying That Maybe Things Ending Isn’t So Bad: Rail against the dying of the light! Why are you OK with this?

Penny’s Reaction to Yelle Saying That Maybe Things Ending Isn’t So Bad: Entropy is TERRIBLE! Everything needs order!

The greasy cashier’s response to Ostentatia’s flirty, “Come here often?” is “To my job? Honestly no.” Brennan? Chef’s kiss. 

My other fave line this episode is from Sam. “I believe Cinnamon fucks.”

It’s very cute that Penny is like, “I gotta text Riz about this Eidelon stuff!” Not because she wants help. Just so they can geek out together. 

The joke that Brennan didn’t think about the birds is so funny considering all the bird facts in Misfits.

Also re Birds attacking: “They made a movie about this Brennan!” 

Good on Ant for refusing an Aguefort sweatshirt from Charity when offered after the little scrying incident before. Remembering things like this saves lives. 

It has been brought up several times that Ending isn’t necessarily Bad just Ancient and Powerful and I trust Yelle’s vibe check but also, like, a forest fire doesn’t have malice behind it but it can still devastate a city while it clears out dead trees that need to be cleared, you know? Not ready to start wild speculation yet but I am curious. And am similarly curious about the sisters Ending has mentioned. Oh and the parallels of 7 Maidens, 7 mirrors. It’s all there, we just need a little more info. 

Honestly, get you a man who will see you rushing out of a building, loudly claiming to have diarrhea, and instead of being grosses out will just supportively confess his own stomach issues. I wish he was just a little younger cause I want that for Ant. 

I do like that D20 has been playing a little more fast and loose with the RP ep/combat ep format. I think it really helps with story flow. 

In this episode Antiope and Brennan as various non-Zelda NPCs rolled 2 Nat 20s. O rolled one. Ant rolled 1 Nat 1--which was on a self imposed roll to see how she responded to Sephie’s tramp stamp improv. And O may have rolled one for initiative also but I wasn’t sure. 

[cactusnymph]

Prompt fill #9 for @dimension20alphabet:

Injury

The air smells of smoke, dust and blood.

 Fabian is pretty sure that his left foot is broken, which sucks because he’s going to have a hard time kicking anyone’s ass without both his feet. Dancing will also be difficult.

 He clutches his battle sheet and tries to pull his foot out of the rubble it got stuck between. If he gets his hands on the bastards who made this damn cave explode above them even their ancestors are going to have a headache waking up tomorrow.

 But for that to happen, Fabian needs to get out of here.

 “Fabian?”

 Riz’ voice sounds hoarse and muffled and Fabian assumes that he’s somewhere behind another pile of rubble.

 “I’m over here”, he answers and tries to make his voice sound casual and not like he wants to do something embarrassing, like whimper from the pain. Fabian can barely anything and breathing is hard because there is so much dust in the air.

 “I’ll—let me see if I can get to you. You okay?”, Riz asks. Fabian doesn’t waste his breath to answer, he tries to push some of the rubble away from his ankle and lets out a wheezing breath. His mouth tastes like iron.

 He can hear Riz try to move the rubble out of the way, but his arms are like tiny twigs so Fabian doesn’t see how he’ll get any of that shit to move. And Fabian, being uselessly stuck with his damn foot, can’t help him.

 Fabian thought that splitting up the party was the smartest move, but now he regrets their choices because damn, they sure could use Kristen’s healing or Adaine’s magic or Gorgug’s insane muscles to move some of this shit.

 The quest to defeat the Night Yorb hasn’t exactly gone well so far. Fabian feels like being stuck in a fucking cave with his foot broken and his mouth full of blood is the peak of bad luck that they have reached so far. He can only hope that the others had more success on their ventures.

 But as far as he knows, they’re also stuck somewhere in here.

 Fabian never specifically had a problem with small, closed spaces, but right now he feels like his chest is unusually tight and he could swear that the damn ceiling is getting closer while he’s desperately trying to get his foot unstuck.

 The rubble behind him shifts and a few pained noises bring Fabian back to reality as a small, lithe shape wiggles itself through an impossible tiny crack made in the pile behind him as Riz appears, his head bleeding profusely and his face contorted in a mix of determination and pain.

 “Are you okay?”, Riz asks again the second he scrambles through the hole he made. Fabian notices that his hands are also bleeding—probably from digging through all those stones. Something in Fabian’s chest feels like a nervous bird fluttering against his rib cage and it takes him a confused moment to realize that it’s his heart.

 Riz has been different since they defeated the Nightmare King.

 More self confident somehow. Less awkward. Scarily competent.

 And he stopped wearing his hat.

 Fabian has been feeling weird around him for a while, but the fact that this little Goblin dug himself through sharp rocks to get to him, bleeding and bruised and hurt, and the first thing he does is ask if Fabian is okay—it does things to him.

 Fabian refuses to acknowledge this.

 “My foot is stuck”, he says.

 Riz—and he’s been Riz for a while now, at least in Fabian’s head, and not The Ball anymore—turns his huge, yellow eyes to the stones that are crushing Fabian’s foot between them.

 “Got it”, Riz says and without doing anything about his bleeding head or his bleeding hands he gets to work, his small frame working tirelessly, determined, stubborn even. The rocks are big—way too big for Riz to actually lift them.

 But Riz wouldn’t be Riz if he wouldn’t be a nerd even about stuff like this.

 Using his sword as leverage he manages to roll the bigger ones off of the pile. While he works Fabian can see blood dripping down the sword and Riz’ face.

 He swallows heavily.

 “You’re bleeding”, he croaks.

 “I know. I’ll take care of it in a second”, Riz answers.

 He’s focused.

 Fabian knows that, when Riz gets like this, there is no way to deter him from the task at hand. It sometimes happens for a project at school, or when he has a case he’s close to cracking. He disappears into his head and into his task at hand and it takes hours for him to appear again.

 Fabian doesn’t know when exactly he started to catalogue all of Riz’ facial expressions and behaviors, but he has quite the collection so far.

 Riz works in silence. Sometimes, when he gets like this, he starts mumbling to himself, but not this time.

 He looks almost grim.

 Fabian isn’t sure if it’s actually getting warmer in here or if that’s just him.

 “Do you think the others got stuck as well?”, he says to distract himself from the heat crawling under his skin and the fluttering in his chest.

 “Probably not. By my estimation they should be way further down already”, Riz murmurs and wipes some sweat off his forehead, which simply leaves a smearing of blood where his hand touches his green skin.

 Fabian has no idea since when his damn brain finds it mesmerizing to see blood on his best friend’s skin, but here he is, staring at Riz because he looks weirdly... ragged? Badass?

 Fabian is annoyed at himself.

 When he finally feels the weight lifted off his ankle he pulls his leg out and makes a pained noise in the back of his throat that causes Riz’ concentrated gaze to turn to him. His yellow eyes remind Fabian of cats’ eyes in the dark and he swallows again as Riz comes over to him and touches Fabian’s face to turn his head to the side so he can inspect his wounds.

 Fabian’s heart stumbles in his chest.

 Gods dammit, this is completely ridiculous.

 “You bleeding anywhere else?”, Riz asks and then his eyes find Fabian’s and they’re staring at each other. Fabian knows that Riz is in no headspace to think about kissing, but damn, Fabian does. Fabian’s stupid brain tells him to just grab Riz by the shoulders and pull him down, pull him on top of Fabian to minimize the space between them—

 “Fabian? You got a concussion? Let me check your eyes.”

 Riz gets even closer.

 Fabian thinks he might die.

 He thinks about the way Aelwyn made him feel back then, when he got so excited about kissing her again. Somehow that was nothing compared to how he’s been feeling about Riz for a while now. As Fig said, kissing someone you’re “madly in love with just hits different”.

 “Don’t think so”, he manages and his voice sounds like sandpaper on stone.

 “Okay. I have my healer’s kit. Just let me clean my hands real quick.”

 Fabian watches how Riz procures water and his healer’s kit from his bag and starts washing his hands as good as he can before he tries to wrap bandages around both of his hands. He lets out a frustrated hiss.

 “Let me—“, Fabian says and grabs Riz’ hands.

 To be fair, Fabian never paid much attention when Cathilda or Kristen tried to teach him first aid because it never was of much interest to him—and now he definitely wishes he had listened a little closer. But it can’t be that difficult to wrap a tiny pair of Goblin hands in bandages to make them stop bleeding.

 “You have to do, like, a kind of V-shape. Yeah. Like that. Not too tight, please. Yeah, that works.”

 What Fabian didn’t really think through was that now he’s somewhat holding Riz’ hands. Which doesn’t exactly help his brain or his heart to calm down. At least his internal turmoil distracts him from the pain and the situation they’re currently in.

 He remembers how Riz stole that healer’s kit on their very first day of school. He’s had it ever since and restocked it carefully for each of their adventures, taking great care to learn how to give first aid to his friends when everyone else was out of spells or they were separated.

 “Thanks, Fabian”, Riz says once it’s done and he wiggles his fingers slightly, then turns his eyes back on Fabian’s face.

 “I’ll take care of your head first and then I can check out that foot. Maybe I can—I dunno. Make a splint or something.”

 “You—uh. You got really good at this”, Fabian says and turns his gaze upwards so he doesn’t have to focus on Riz’ yellow eyes right in front of him anymore.

 “Thanks”, Riz mumbles and his bandages fingers touch Fabian’s face gently.

 Fabian kind of wishes one of the rocks had just knocked him out.

 This is pathetic.

 He is Fabian Aramais Seacaster.

 Maybe his confidence died briefly—or for a longer period of time—back on their Spring Break adventure, but he’s been building it back up! He’s a catch! He’s amazing!

 Riz should be the one getting nervous because he’s allowed to touch Fabian’s handsome face.

 “I think once we’re patched up you should take my sword and teleport through all that rubble and I’ll try to crawl back. We need to find the others.”

 “You shouldn’t crawl back through that, The Ball”, Fabian says, thinking about Riz’s bloody hands. Riz shouldn’t get hurt on Fabian’s behalf.

 Gods, Fabian has it bad.

 “It’s fine. I’m smaller than you, so it’s easier for me. And I don’t think you should move too much with that brok—“

 “I’m in—I have feelings. For you.”

 Silence.

 Fabian doesn’t dare to breathe. Two seconds ago it felt right to finally say it, but now he’s regretting all his life choices leading up to this, as Riz’ yellow eyes stare at him, his small fingers still on Fabian’s forehead, holding a piece of gauze against the wound.

 “Wh—what?”

 “Forget it—it’s uh—I probably do have a concussion. Nevermind!”

 He can tell that Riz doesn’t buy it and also that Fabian’s words have ripped him out of his state of hyper-focus, something that Fabian has never managed to do before. Maybe he should feel kind of proud. But instead he feels sick to his stomach.

 “Feelings? Like—uh—like...”

 Fabian sees the confidence slip from Riz’ face like a mask he wore, and underneath is still the socially awkward kid handing people fucking business cards and vomiting inside of backpacks because he heard some clues.

 “Yeah. Like that”, he says.

 It’s hard to see in the dark, but Fabian could swear that Riz’ cheeks are tinted dark green.

 “Really?”

 His voice sounds very small now. Nervous. As if he expects Fabian to start laughing and say “Of course not, The Ball”. Which is probably fair. It’s not like Fabian ever managed to make his appreciation of his best friend very clear.

 “Hm.”

 “Oh.”

 “Oh? What does that mean?”

 “I—uh—I don’t. Um—this is—“

 Riz laughs nervously and turns his head.

 “I didn’t—um. Well”, he laughs again and sits down, hugs his knees and props his chin on top of them. “I kinda didn’t expect to ever hear that. From you. Um—yeah. It’s been... a long time. For me? I guess.”

Fabian’s brain short circuits and his heart does a very complicated dancing routine.

 “You—what?”

 Riz peaks up at him. Shrugs.

 “I’ve kinda been in love with you since. I don’t even know. A long time.”

 “For real?”

 “Yeah. For real.”

 “Okay, fuck this cave. Fuck this whole thing. We have to get out of here so I can fucking kiss your brains out. Give me your sword.”

 Riz hides his face for a second and then he laughs, a shaky, nervous but also happy laugh. He does not hand Fabian his sword.

 “First the wounds. Then the sword. Then—then the other stuff.”

 “Fine. You better hurry up.”

 “I will. Hold still.”

 Fabian is still determined to kick everyone’s ass once they get out of this. But maybe he’ll also send them some fruit baskets to the hospital afterwards.

[pricemarshfield]

in a d20 mood so i’m about to fill out a bunch of @adairable-dirks‘ hurt/comfort requests for the bad kids. love you dude, here’s fabian & kristen, freshman year era

Sometime this month, Kristen’s stopped living at her house.

Fabian doesn’t know the details. If he’s being honest, he doesn’t particularly want to ask. He’s a little worried that it has something to do with the book he got her, but it’s been a few weeks since that, so, probably not?

Daybreak, maybe. Fabian doesn’t regret killing the man at all--no heart, he’s Fabian Aramais Seacaster--but Kristen had looked somewhat uncomfortable, the back half of the fight.

Anyway, all this to say, Fabian hears his father’s voice boom through the house right as he’s trying to sleep, and Kristen’s, not as loud but just as clear, a few moments later. They didn’t have plans, he doesn’t think.

Kristen walks into his room like she’s been invited, and Fabian spares a brief thought for the idea that she hasn’t actually been in here before. Brief thought rather than a whole tangent because Kristen’s eyes, as best he can tell with his semi-darkvision, are red and swollen.

“Kristen?” he says. “Are you--”

“Tried to stay at home, uh. Didn’t work out. Riz is already asleep and I really don’t want to wake him up and Fig’s out at some concert and I’m not staying with Adaine and there isn’t room in Gorgug’s room for another medium-sized person, so. Can I stay here?”

“Of course,” Fabian says. “Am I really last choice?”

Kristen winces, as if realizing how rude it sounds, but doesn’t contradict him, which. Fair.

“Riz is the one who murdered your coach, I don’t know why you’re mad at me,” Fabian mutters, half-joking, and Kristen laughs louder than he was ready for.

“You know, I’m actually not?” Kristen says. “And, like, I should be, right? Because murder’s a sin in pretty much all of the religions. Like, all of them. But he was starting the apocalypse, so maybe not? But he was already defeated when you guys, like--”

“Do you want water?” Fabian interrupts, rude enough his father would scold him if they were talking without tension these days.

Kristen sighs. “Sure. Yeah.”

Fabian goes to ring the bell for Cathilda until Kristen points her staff at him in a very obvious threat, so he slinks into the hallway and fills a glass with water from the fridge. (Not the sink. It being filtered doesn’t make it any less unsanitary.)

When he comes back, Kristen is nestled in his covers.

“Um,” Fabian says.

“This is a queen,” Kristen says. “It’ll be fine.”

“It’s a king,” Fabian corrects, and Kristen smirks at him. He feels a rush of affection and annoyance all at once. “I have a very nice couch you could sleep on.”

“Is this banter or are you genuinely trying to get rid of me?” Kristen asks, and her tone is light and a million alarm bells go off in Fabian’s head all at once.

“Um,” Fabian says, which is already the wrong answer. 

“Forget it, I’ll just ask Fig to come home early,” Kristen says.

“No, it’s fine,” Fabian says. “I’m not going to a bad host, my father would disown me. And I do--care about you. All of you. But also you, specifically?”

“Wow,” Kristen says. “Could you sound more unsure about that if you tried?”

“Come on, I got the world religions book,” Fabian says, and Kristen’s gaze shutters, a little, and Fabian briefly indulges in a fantasy of learning magic just to make people forget just how often he puts his foot in his goddamn mouth.

There’s a beat of silence.

“We don’t have to talk about it, if you don’t want to,” Fabian says. “We can just sleep. Or I can ask Cathilda to bring us some snuff powder.”

“Cathilda?”

“My maid,” Fabian says.

Kristen’s nose wrinkles. “I’ll pass. I’m still a little hungover, anyway.”

“Still? It’s not even midnight, wouldn’t you still be drunk?” (One thing Fabian does know about, thank you very much.)

“From last night,” Kristen says, and Fabian quietly resolves to make sure Kristen stays away from his mother for awhile.

“Let’s just get some sleep,” Fabian says.

“Okay,” Kristen says. “This bed is insanely comfortable.”

“1000 thread count,” Fabian brags.

“Mine back at home are like, 150,” Kristen says. “I’m stealing this.”

“You’d trip over your own feet before you made it out the door with the sheet,” Fabian says, getting in the bed and staying as far to his own side as possible. What’s the etiquette here? Is he being rude by avoiding physical contact? But wouldn’t it be ruder to accidentally get in her personal bubble?

“You’d trip over your feet,” Kristen says petulantly, eyes already closed. “This bed is soooo comfy.”

“Yes,” Fabian says, and when she does fall asleep, he very quietly gets back out of bed to grab some aspirin for when she wakes up, too.

[swarmkeepers]

riz & gorgug for #5! ✨

5. heard you tell the same story multiple times but doesn’t point it out to you when you excitedly bring it up to them again + riz & gorgug (prompts linked here)

(starting immediately post-fhsy, and a little more angsty than the other prompt fills so far because it deals with some of the aftermath of spring break. sometimes friendship is late nights and brownie recipes and old stories.)

There are forty minutes left until Elmville when Riz digs his claws into the headrest of the passenger’s seat and clambers over the seat backs to sit shotgun in the Hangvan. 

Everyone else is asleep, or as Riz suspects in Tracker’s case as she stays oddly still as a human pillow for Kristen in the backseat, at least pretending to. But Riz is quest-restless even though they’re heading home, and Gorgug’s awake because he’s driving, and both of their darkvision light up the street ahead for them. 

Gorgug doesn’t look surprised when Riz lands in the seat next to him. Of course. Because his whole party knows that Riz doesn’t sleep, or at least has to be told to, or has to know that there are hit points to be regenerated and a fight to be alert for the next day. 

Streetlights speed by and Gorgug brings the van to a smooth stop at a light, accelerating smoothly up afterwards to not jostle anyone in the backseat. He’s practiced, easy, calm. Meanwhile, Riz’s thoughts are a messy turbulent maelstrom. He can’t sleep, and after everything in the Nightmare Forest if he never saw a bed again it’d be too soon. But, forget sleep, his brain isn’t even letting him relax right now, and Riz is struggling to figure out the questions that are on the tip of his tongue. His fingers itch for a ball of red string, trying to figure out why he wanted to be up here with the passenger seat and the windshield and Gorgug.

“What’s being a barbarian like?” he asks quietly, and Gorgug doesn’t exactly startle but does tip his head to the side curiously. 

“Can I ask why?” 

“I’m—angry,” Riz says, surprising himself, but it feels true enough. “I killed Kalina, but she said she was with me my whole life. And I hate that.” He wants to hiss, to bare his teeth and make the hair on the back of his neck stand up, but it’s not Gorgug he’s mad at. “Sometimes I wonder if I should use that to. Hit things.” 

“Okay,” Gorgug says. 

“And you—you know about that. About being angry, and not being. As comfortable. Or at least you’ve said stuff like that.” Riz picks at his long fingernails, pretending to be nonchalant and not looking up to see if Gorgug’s insight is better than his shitty attempt at deception. 

“Tell me about why you wanted to be a rogue?” Gorgug asks instead, and Riz understands it’s not really a question. He trusts Gorgug. He thinks about it. 

“Um, my mom was always a detective, I guess. And my dad was a spy, but I guess I didn’t know that.” Riz spends a lot of his time thinking. He’s realizing he doesn’t spend a lot of time thinking about himself. Maybe he needs to make a new conspiracy board. “Uh. I guess the first time I ever saw Penny sneak attack someone was really cool, I definitely knew I wanted to do that.”

Gorgug makes a soft hm? noise that asks Riz to keep talking. “Because I was little and Penny’s little too, and we were at the mall and some asshole catcalled her? And oh, man, you should have seen her, Penny was probably an Aguefort freshman then? But she told me to hide behind this vending machine and—”

--

They’re all the way home, with the Mordred Manor crew taking their stuff out of the trunk while Gorgug and Riz keep talking. Riz finished his story hurriedly as they pulled into the driveway, ending with Penny teaching Riz to make brownie bars at Strongtower after the sneak attack incident and being so cool and badass and nonchalant about making that guy’s nose gush with blood. He’s talking fast and gesturing big like he doesn’t usually, caught up in a story that he can tell well and that he hadn’t thought of in a while. Him and his rogue friends are tiny badasses. 

“That was a good story,” Gorgug says. “Rogues seem pretty cool.” 

Riz grins, all his fangs out and happy in the driveway of the manor. “Thanks, dude.” 

“I think you can be angry and not a barbarian,” Gorgug says, gently. 

And “Okay,” Riz says, gentled. 

--

It’s the tail end of one of Fabian’s all-out summertime ragers. The Bad Kids are in a big cuddle pile that barely fits on the picnic blanket on the lawn of Seacaster Manor, and Gorgug’s at the very bottom. Riz is tipsy on half a beer (goblin metabolisms are not good and it’s not his fault) and he thinks Gorgug looks a little lonely, lying on his stomach and tapping at his crystal with all the wind knocked out of him from everyone lying on top. He scrambles down the pile of friend-bodies and sits on the grass by Gorgug. Riz racks his brain for something good to say. He doesn’t want Gorgug to be lonely, not when Riz is going to be up all night and Riz is usually the lonely one.

“Di’ I ever tell you about the first time I saw someone get sneak attacked,” Riz says, words big and bubbly and coming out too fast. He doesn’t care, he’s buzzed and happy and Gorgug looks like he could use a good story.

“I don’t remember, tell me,” Gorgug says, putting his crystal down face down so its glow goes dark. 

“Oh man, you’re going to love this story. It was, like, me ‘n Penny at the mall, and there was this real asshole of a dude, and I didn’t know Penny went to Aguefort but she took out this knife? And it was like she flew at him—”

At some point in the story Gorgug falls asleep, and Riz is more pleased than annoyed. He looks cozy. And not lonely. 

--

“What’s this, The Ball?” Fabian asks when Riz takes a fantasy tupperware of brownie bars out of his briefcase and puts it on the the table in the cafeteria.

“They’re sneak attack brownies,” Riz says. 

It evidently does not clear up any of Fabian’s questions. 

“Penny—Penny Luckstone?—they’re her recipe, she taught me how to make them the same day I ever saw her sneak attack a dude,” he explains. “She like, jumped out from behind one of those fake potted plants at the mall and slashed him so bad with a dagger and then she didn’t even get sneak attack on it but she also socked him in the nose and it was like the coolest thing I’d ever seen. And then she just went home and washed the blood off her fist and then we made brownies.” He puts a hand on his chest. “And I’ll never forget it.” 

“Okay, The Ball,” Fabian says, but he takes a brownie. 

Next to him, Gorgug’s already halfway into his second, nodding happily and energetically so his hair flops in front of his face. “I love that story!” he says. He’s all leaned in, listening to Riz’s story.

Riz lights up—he’s no Fabian, with expensive magical gifts, and he’s no Gorgug either with little artificed trinkets and sweeping big gestures. But he’d remembered the story and remembered the brownies and wanted to make some, and he’s just glad his friends like them as much as he does.

“Because the secret ingredient is sour cream,” Riz confides. Fabian fake-sputters, sending tiny brownie crumbs everywhere, and Gorgug swats at him. 

“You were eating it just fine before!” Gorgug says indignantly. “Respect the brownie, dude!”

“You’re right, Gorgug,” Fabian sighs. He takes another bite. “They’re not bad, The Ball.” 

--

Riz only dimly registers footsteps pounding up the stairs and also a greataxe brute forcing its way through the booby traps at his office door. His crystal is abandoned on the floor next to him, the last text he sent to Gorgug still on the screen. It’d been “Having a bad time. At my office. Can you come help? Thanks, Riz” and it’d been typed out with shaky fingers as his breaths started coming too fast, the way it does whenever he lets himself be alone in his own office for too long. Riz hates it but he needs help. He forgot the period on that text and it’s been staring at him for the past few minutes. 

His brain is whirring too fast—Shadow Cat, Kalina’s eyes in his own eyes, Baron in his mirror in his own office, darkness and danger and Fabian in churning waters, he died in that forest and so did Adaine and so could any of his friends, bullets dodged and bullets fired and it’s too much, too much. His breaths are coming too fast but also not fast enough. Riz feels suffocated. 

He’s wedged himself into his own briefcase of holding, the sides squeezing his arms in a way that’s grounding and comforting when nobody else is here in his office to help.

But Gorgug is. Gorgug is here to help now. He skids to a stop in front of Riz and sits on the floor and Riz only dimly registers it out of the corner of his eye where his head is curled into his chest trying to make himself small, make himself safe. 

“Riz, can I touch you?”

Riz does his best to nod and Gorgug just wraps long lanky boy arms around his torso, gently lifting Riz out of his own briefcase and settling him in Gorgug’s lap as they sit on the floor of the office. He doesn’t let go, just squeezes tighter. It’s so much help, and also— “Can you. Talk? Anything— Anything’s fine,” Riz says. 

“Um. Sure, Riz. I guess I can. I could list a recipe? My parents have been trying to teach me to cook more, for when we go to college in a couple of years. I’m sorry, I’m not like Adaine, I don’t have lots of interesting things memorized,” Gorgug says, apologetic. Riz wants to be able to tell him not to be, but he’s a little preoccupied trying to make his brain tell his lungs to breathe.

“Uh, so these are called sneak attack brownies?” Gorgug says hesitantly. Riz realizes what he’s doing and tries to laugh, the giggle interrupting the choked breath he was trying to take.

“They’re called sneak attack brownies because they’re my badass friend’s recipe. And he learned it from his badass friend. Um, I don’t know this super well, actually, but I really should by now and I’m just going to keep talking and if it’s wrong then I guess it’s wrong? I know that you need chocolate for a brownie. And eggs and sugar. You told me the secret ingredient is sour cream.”

Riz nods, thudding his head into Gorgug’s chest a little. He takes a deep breath. Gorgug’s hoodie is soft. And he’s a good listener.

“Right, uh. After sour cream. Flour. And butter?”

“The butter’s— the butter’s unsalted,” Riz manages to eke out, voice small and quiet and mostly talking to his own knees. 

“Got you. Unsalted butter,” Gorgug agrees, easy as anything. 

“Penny said— Penny said that dude she punched’s tears were salty enough, that’s how I remember it,” Riz tells him.

“Tell me more?” Gorgug asks, and he waits patiently as Riz lets his brain just focus on a recipe, an easy recipe and a badass story. It helps, to be given something focused to do. And Riz is just so, so glad he has friends who will give that to him, will listen over and over again when Riz needs to talk. 

And Gorgug waits. And Riz tells him. 

from the prompt list linked here! i’m closing prompts from this particular list simply because i have so many excellent ones to get through

[grumpyhedgehogs]

tangled up in your old bedsheets

Summary:  Fabian wraps Riz in his sheet a lot, The Hangman is strangely jealous all of a sudden, and Riz figures some things out on his own.

~

It takes maybe a lot longer than it should for Fabian to understand exactly what’s happening with the whole “wrapping Riz up in his sheet all the time” thing. In his defense, there’s a lot of shit going down when it first happens. Riz has just been revivified only to be kicked off a fucking cliff by Kalina and the world is in peril and Fabian is stretching, stretching, stretching, to reach Riz before he’s lost to him forever. So when the fire elemental snags the goblin out of the air and kisses his cheek and Fabian curls his best friend into himself, swaddling him like a newborn, the half-elf doesn’t think much of it other than thank the gods you’re alright.

But then it happens again. And again. And again. And no matter what, even when Fabian doles out gifts and aggressively supports all his friends, Riz is the only one who ever seems to end up wrapped in Fabian’s sheet.

Fabian realizes this the summer after sophomore year and then aggressively stops thinking about what it could mean.

~

When the Night Yorb is defeated, Riz dies again. Thankfully Kristen is standing right next to him when he goes down so their rogue isn’t out for long but Fabian feels it deep in his bones. He sees the light go out of Riz’s eyes, watches, like he had just last spring, as his best friend falls, limp, to the ground. He sees him die and is unable to do anything about it. Again.

That evening, they have a bonfire. The final showdown had happened on the beach, where the Night Yorb had been ready to extend its power from the shores of Solace to Leviathan to Fallinel and beyond until the Bad Kids stopped it.

Now, Kristen and Fig are teaching Ayda how to shotgun a beer with mixed results. Adaine and Aelwyn are curled together, Aelwyn already trancing after using every ounce of her abjuration magic to keep her sister from being completely obliterated in the last ten minutes of the battle. Gorgug had almost immediately been mobbed with invasive, uncomfortable relationship advice from the Seven Maidens, who had come to help in the last fight after Riz had cracked the code which revealed the location of the Night Yorb’s power source with Zelda’s help. The half-orc seems fine, if a little overwhelmed by their chattering--Zelda is at least acting as something of a buffer.

Fabian and Riz had been side by side to strike the finishing blow to the Night Yorb when it went down. He’d turned and looked at Riz and had seen the bruises and the blood and the lines of pain in his face and had pulled out his sheet without hesitation. Riz hadn’t even pretended to protest.

Now, as they sit in the shadows, the fire’s light flickering over the bags under Riz’s eyes and the hollows of his cheeks, Fabian doesn’t pretend to resist the urge he has to pull the fabric tighter around Riz, tucking it between his arms and chest so it can’t pull free when the goblin shifts. He’s pressed up against Fabian’s side, half on top of him as Fabian drapes his arms around him and pulls one knee up against his back. His other leg extends out towards the fire and they’d both kicked off their shoes like everyone else had a long time ago. He digs his toes into the cold sand and lets it remind him he’s alive. They have survived.

“You know, I’m not actually that cold,” Riz mutters. His ears are drooping with exhaustion. Fabian hums and leans his chin on the crown of his head. Riz’s hair smells like seasalt. “You could take your blanket back now.”

“Battle sheet,” Fabian corrects absentmindedly. “You uncomfortable?”

“No.” His voice is so soft. He wriggles one hand out of the sheet--Fabian feels an unhappy rumble begin in his chest--and curls his clawed fingers around Fabian's hand, splayed in the sand beside Riz’s sheet-encased hip for balance. Fabian tightened his grip immediately. The rumble dies in his throat. “No, I’m not.”

“Good.” Fabian tugs the sheet just a little more, secures it, and rests.

~

It happens when they’re not in mortal danger or coming down from a battle high, too. The first time Fabian notices it--and when he notices Riz noticing it--is movie night. All the Bad Kids as well as Ragh, Tracker, Ayda and Aelwyn are gathered at Mordred Manor, sprawled over couches and armchairs and across the floor. Fabian is cuddled up to Aelwyn on the couch, Adaine on her other side, when he is chosen to be the first sacrifice in the name of snack refills. Naturally, he tells everyone goodnaturedly that he hates them, and goes.

Fabian isn’t even really thinking about it when he does it.

He comes back and sets the popcorn in Tracker’s lap and hands the sodas out and then he realizes that his spot next to Aelwyn has been filled by Fig, who is sitting with Ayda in her lap and very much not paying attention to the crystal screen. Both Abernant sisters do not look like they appreciate this development, but neither are very likely to say anything in the name of keeping the peace.

So Fabian shrugs and begrudgingly lopes over to the cushy armchair with the winged back where Riz is curled up with his knees to his chest. The Ball looks up, startled, but doesn’t make a sound when Fabian picks him right up, plops down in the armchair and then sets The Ball down beside him. Without even really looking away from the movie, the half-elf digs out his sheet and unfolds it, letting the sparks settle before he spreads it over both of them. Riz is wedged between his left thigh and the armrest, small enough that he doesn’t have to fully sit in Fabian’s lap to share the space. He does have to lean into Fabian’s side to see the screen around him though; Fabian feels more than sees The Ball glance at him out of the corner of his eye. His tail slaps once, twice against Fabian’s side, and Fabian drops his arm onto The Ball’s back in response, quelling the detective’s squirming. The Ball leans harder into his side and mutters to himself.

“What?” Fabian asks, defensive and not really understanding why.

“You know you could’ve just asked to sit down,” Riz says. What he means is, what the fuck, Fabian?

“Can we just watch the movie in peace, please?” Fabian replies. What he means is, please don’t call attention to this.

Riz shuts up. They watch the movie in peace.

Fabian catches Aelwyn looking at him that night, a strange gleam in her eye; it’s the one she gets when she’s mastered an overly complicated piece of magic that’s been elusive for a long time. Fabian shifts, but doesn’t let go of Riz, who is tucked even more tightly into his side as the night wears on, his head on Fabian’s chest and the sheet tangled up between them.

He shakes it off; there’s nothing here for Aelwyn to understand.

Nothing.

~

After that, it’s just an easy way of keeping track of Riz. The rogue has such high sleight of hand and stealth; he’s really a menace to society. Fabian is doing the authorities a favor, honestly. It also helps him get used to how to whip the sheet in a non-lethal capacity, teaches him how hard to snap the fabric around someone’s ankle to send them careening back to their spot on the couch, or how to flick it around their waist to pull them back to his side without leaving bruises. He even gets good enough to snag Riz’s tail and yank him back from the curb when he went to step into the road without looking up from his clues, which is probably the coolest thing Fabian does that week.

Riz complains and pouts and never tells him directly to stop, which he would if it were a real issue. But since he is a gentleman first Fabian asks, just to make sure.

“I don’t--really mind, actually,” Riz says haltingly. The tips of his ears are slowly turning turquoise. Fabian is extremely interested in this development. For science, of course. “It’s nice, knowing--uh, knowing you’re there to, like, catch me. If I fall. Or something. And the elemental keeps the sheet really warm, so. It’s nice. I don’t mind.”

Fabian grins, and something strange and pleasant settles in his chest.

~

The first time he really has to confront the idea that maybe it’s not just Fabian being paranoid about the amount of time he spends wrapping Riz in a sheet is when Aelwyn breaks up with him. It’s been coming for a long time, so obvious it’s like staring down an oncoming train. Aelwyn is trying to be kinder now, has been working on being gentler with people, and so of course she comes to their meeting at the ice cream shop with a delicately worded bullet point list on why they can’t be together anymore.

“And really, we did both acknowledge exactly how unhealthy for each other we are when we got into this,” she finishes, looking up at him over the rims of her new catlike glasses. She and Adaine match now. “I mean, I very explicitly stated how bad an idea this was and you agreed.”

“Yeah,” Fabian says, because he did. It still doesn’t mean it hurts any less.

“Honestly Fabian, sometimes I--I wonder why you even said yes in the first place. It’s not like you don’t have another, probably better, option hanging around all the time.”

He has no fucking idea what that’s supposed to mean. “I have no fucking idea what that’s supposed to mean.”

Aelwyn looks at him, shrewd and calculating, and then sighs. “Men. You’re all so useless.”

“Hey,” Fabian says, halfhearted. She just broke up with him; it’d be nice of her to display a little consideration.

Her mouth presses into a thin line, and even though he knows she’s not happy about this either, Fabian gets the distinct feeling she’s laughing at him. Just a little. “How come you never wrap me in your sheet?”

“Wh-what?”

“You always wrap Riz in your battle sheet. Constantly. I’ve counted three times this week, Fabian, and it’s only Thursday. How come you never wrap me in your precious battle sheet? I was your girlfriend up until this moment, wasn’t I?”

“I have no idea what The Ball has to do with you breaking up with me,” Fabian tells her honestly.

“Everything, my dear.” Aelwyn says as she stands and tosses a five dollar bill on their table in Basrar’s. “Absolutely everything. Think about it.”

~

The Ball has nothing to do with this.

“You have nothing to do with this.” Fabian tells him when Riz rushes into his room in Seacaster Manor, armed with dvds and ice cream and a grim expression Fabian recognizes from the moment before he ate Kalvaxus’s face off.

“Well if you didn’t want me here why did you call me?” Riz asks, looking affronted. He takes a step towards the door but wavers, looking back and forth between the hallway beyond and Fabian’s teary, red face. “Look, I wanna help, but if you need some time alone--”

“No! That’s not what I meant.” Fabian flaps one arm at him frantically. “I just-- it’s just stupid, never mind, just get over here, The Ball.”

Riz dumps the items in his arms and bounds over, sympathy leaking over his expression. He stops by the foot of the bed which is too far away and Fabian would roll his eyes and whip the sheet out for him if he weren’t already wrapped up in it and trying not to look like he’s been crying for the past hour and a half. He has not. He has only been crying for an hour and twenty minutes, thank you very much.

“I’m really sorry, Fabian,” Riz says, soft and kind and what Fabian needs to hear and what he wants none of at the same time. “I know you really like Aelwyn.”

Something in The Ball’s expression shifts, a little, drops down and gets even more serious and Fabian feels that instinctive, commonplace need to know more about him. Fabian fails an insight roll though, and shakes his head. He reaches out again. “Just, just come here, The Ball, gods--”

“I’m standing right next to you--” is all The Ball can get out before he lets out a high little yelp and gets lifted into the air. He’s so light Fabian can manhandle him onto the mattress and into the sheet with one arm. Fabian wonders if he’s getting enough to eat, if he’s spiraling in his office too much, if he hasn’t been sleeping lately. After the Night Yorb incident, he and The Ball had slept in the same bed on and off, on the promise to wake each other up when they had nightmares. It was a terrible few weeks.

The only thing Fabian misses, he admits to himself as he sets The Ball down on the mattress next to him and drapes half of the sheet across his shoulders, is the warmth he woke up to every morning. Riz is a familiar, reassuring weight against Fabian’s side; he didn’t realize after the nightmares went away and The Ball started sleeping over on the weekends rather than every night how much he would miss this.

Riz is, as always, game once he realizes what the plan is. He curls up under the sheet with a familiarity that makes the pressure in Fabian’s cracked chest ease just a little. He wraps his arms around Fabian’s middle and his tail flicks up to curl loosely around Fabian’s wrist where his arm is hooked around The Ball’s shoulders. The sheet is soft as cream and silvery in the low light as it folds around them both; it is on autopilot that Fabian takes the edges of the sheet and tucks them around his friend, until they are nothing more than a weirdly shaped lump of fabric.

“I’m supposed to comfort you right now, not the other way around,” The Ball points out, humor coloring his tone even as he keeps his voice low. Fabian leans harder against him and Riz grunts.

“You are,” Fabian says. “You are.”

He’s not okay, but he will be.

~

Fabian gets over Aelwyn relatively quickly, which should probably be a sign of how serious he actually was about her. But there’s still something strange in not looking forward to meeting her now, after a year of striving to get information on her, a year of striving to get her out of prison, a year of striving to come off as anything besides an awkward teenage boy when she kisses him. It leaves Fabian at a bit of a loose end.

So, naturally, he makes it The Ball’s problem. Or not-problem. It’s more like a solution. He is the solution to The Ball’s depressing self-care mystery. The Ball, it is unsurprising to note, is terrible at taking care of himself. Fabian, on the other hand, has literally trained all his life to protect and fight for others; he’s gotten very good at turning this innate urge into making sure The Ball eats enough and sleeps enough and takes a goddamn break every once in a while.

Case in point.

“Come on, The Ball,” Fabian whines. “This place is honestly so depressing, you reek, and I know for a fact you haven’t slept in three days. It is time to go home.”

“My mom asked me to help her, Fabian,” Riz says. He doesn’t turn to look at Fabian when he speaks, nimble fingers spidering across a map of Elmville he has set up on the wall. There are strings of different colors connecting seemingly random locations together, but Fabian does not doubt they make sense to The Ball. It must be a serious case, anyway; The Ball only loses his hat and tie when it’s serious business. “I can’t give up now.”

“It’s not giving up. Why do you always have to assume that stopping for a little while makes everything worse?”

“Sure feels like it.”

Okay. Time to pull out the big guns. Fabian takes a deep breath and prays Riz won’t hate him for this tomorrow. “Your mom is worried about you. Again.”

Riz’s head jerks around sharply enough that Fabian winces. There’s a sharp crack and Fabian watches as the ink from the broken pen in Riz’s clawed hand drips to the hardwood. Ah, well. That’s the least horrible thing that’s stained this floor. When the detective turns to him Fabian takes a hasty step back. The slits of his eyes dilate wildly, shrinking and growing in size rapidly.

“Did you,” Riz asks deliberately slowly, “just try to use my mom against me?”

“It’s true,” Fabian protests weakly. “She sent me here when I asked where you were. She thought you were with me anyway and she got really mad when she figured out you were still working. You gotta learn to take breaks, man.”

Just like that, Riz deflates. His shoulders relax from where they’ve been hunched around his ears since Fabian walked in and his hackles lower. He scrubs a hand through his hair, leaving trails of blue ink through the strands; Fig would probably call it a look . “I hate when I make her worry.”

“You make everyone worry,” Fabian says without thinking, before backpedaling like a champ at Riz’s scandalized look. “Wait! No! I didn’t--it’s just that you make her-- and me-- but you don’t mean to so it’s fine. Is it hot in here? I feel like it’s hot in here. We should go. Let’s go.”

“You worry about me?”

It’s the quiet way The Ball says it, quiet in the way he hasn’t heard often since the Nightmare King’s Forest, that makes Fabian square his shoulders and set his jaw in determination. He rolls initiative on a surprise round and succeeds. Nat twenty.

“Right.” Fabian declares, and reaches into his jacket. “We’re doing this.”

“What?” Riz’s eyes widen a second later, though, because his insight is crazy high and even his passive rolls are ridiculous. “Aw, no, Fabian, you don’t need to get the sheet out. I don’t need the sheet!”

“It’s too late. It’s already over.”

“Oh come on man, I didn’t mean it like that!”

“It's inescapable,” Fabian flourishes as the sheet unwinds and dances before him, obscuring The Ball’s view of him. “You’ve brought this on yourself.”

Between one blink and the next, Fabian has thrown the sheet about his best friend, movements fluid and expert from so much practice. He’s sure to leave Riz’s inky hand free, but he takes care to bundle his legs into the sheet. Fabian wraps one end of the sheet around the unoccupied arm before pulling it across his body gently and tucks the other end over his chest in the opposite direction before securing the free edge between Riz’s back and his own chest.

Riz is still so light in his arms as Fabian hoists him right off the ground and into a princess carry. Riz squawks and waves his one free hand in Fabian’s face, which makes Fabian grimace and lean back. Ink splatter across the desk.

“Spring break,” Fabian says. He meets Riz’s dark eyes, something in his gut sparking and fluttering and warming him all the way to his toes. “I believe in you.”

“Spring break, I believe in you,” Riz repeats, laughing and accepting the bardic inspiration before rolling his eyes. “It’s nearly winter, you dolt.” It makes something soft in Fabian curl up tight in his chest to hear his best friend laugh, to feel it reverberate in his own arms, in his own bones, and Fabian grins right back.

“The sentiment still stands. Just because you mess up every now and then doesn’t mean that you’re a bad son, The Ball. You’re just so passionate and conscientious and you want to make sure you do your work right the first time so no one gets hurt on your watch. That’s a noble thing to do. Your mom and me worrying about your well-being doesn’t mean that you’re a bad person; it’s just a sign of how much we love you.”

Fabian takes the stairs down to the parking lot as he speaks, focusing more on his feet than Riz’s face, because if he does focus on Riz and his wide eyes and the way his pupils are really fucking dilated right now and how his dumb hair is slicked back with ink and the way his ears are twitching and how he smells like coffee beans and old newspapers, the something in his gut will come up to his chest and constrict around his heart and then he’ll do something really stupid like lean in and--

Nope! Not dealing! Fabian gets his kisses in-- got his kisses in--enough already. No need to deal with all-- this.  

But then Fabian finishes his speech and The Ball makes a strange squeaking noise, and his hand comes to ball up under his own chin, and his eyes are still very wide and his face is so soft and he’s biting his lip, fuck.

Fabian’s hands are sweaty and he nearly fumbles his handful as he comes down hard off the last step, rolling a natural two on his athletics. He curses.

Sire! Are you alright? I will destroy the very stones which mock your footing until they are nothing but dust!

I’m fine, Hangman. Just tripped.

Shall we be escorting The Ball home, then?

“You can let me down now,” Riz says at that exact moment, just as Fabian goes to confirm with his bike. Whatever his expression meant before, the jolt seems to have knocked some sense into him before Fabian could roll insight, and the goblin shifts in his arms. Fabian tightens his grip reflexively, and Riz settles. “You don’t have to take me home.”

“Don’t have to?” Fabian repeats dumbly. Of course he has to! The Ball is his--his--The Ball is capable and brilliant, yes, but he is small and a rogue and Fabian is a martial class. He should be here, to make sure that The Ball is safe.

What do you mean we’re not taking The Ball home? The Hangman howls in the back of his mind. Fabian one hundred percent agrees with the bewildered sentiment.

“I have a bus pass now, I was going to take it home tonight anyway. You’re on the other side of town from me, so you'd just be going out of your way.”

Master! The Hangman exclaims, engines revving. The Ball must not stoop so low as to take the bus!

This is another development that Fabian didn’t really realize was happening until after the fact; The Hangman, for whatever reason, has gotten weirdly possessive of Riz. They’ve given more rides to the detective than the rest of the Bad Kids combined. The Hangvan has been the subject of more than a few arguments.

We are much more capable of protecting The Ball than this bus, Sire. With your battle sheet and my infernal soul, we will be an impenetrable defense!

Fabian isn’t sure what they’re defending Riz against, but he’s not going to disagree with The Hangman. They can protect Riz much better if he comes with them.

“The Hangman is right here, The Ball,” Fabian scoffs. “Don’t be silly. Just get on the bike.”

The Ball opens his mouth like he’s thinking of protesting but he’s also forgetting two very important facts: Fabian has eight points of Strength on him and has him wrapped in his battle sheet, effectively grappled. He hasn't got a chance unless he wants to take the fall damage from wrenching himself away from Fabian, which he would never do. Riz trusts Fabian.

A soft, golden glow starts up in Fabian’s chest at the thought. The Ball should trust Fabian. Fabian--Fabian wants to keep The Ball safe and warm and cared for, and like this, wrapped snugly in Fabian’s regard, The Ball is all of those things. It means a lot--so, so much--that The Ball trusts Fabian to provide this for him.

Okay, Fabian is getting off track again.

“You’re getting on the bike,” Fabian declares imperiously, and plops The Ball down on the seat before sliding on in front of him. He waits, The Hangman revving below them, until he feels The Ball curl up against his back. His arms worm their way around Fabian’s waist and his sharp chin digs into his shoulder; something in the half-elf loosens and expands and the warm glow gets brighter.

They’re silent on the drive home; he can feel Riz curl up tighter against the wind and the sheet flutters around the two of them. Sparks flicker across the fabric, retaining warmth against the night’s coming chill. Fabian purposefully drives slowly, lets the time tick by as Riz presses warm up against his back, safe and sound and wrapped in Fabian’s protection, with Fabian’s bardic inspiration flowing through him. He also purposefully does not consider why this is so very important to him.

It is only when they stop outside Riz’s apartment and he disembarks--The Hangman lets out a low rev of his engine, almost like a purr-- that they break the soft silence that’s descended.

“Back at my office,” Riz starts, faltering, as he hands the sheet back. “You said--you love me?”

Panic bursts like fireworks in Fabian’s chest. “Wh-uh?” He says. “Uh. Uh. You have ink in your hair.”

Then Fabian makes a tactical decision and runs the fuck away. It is not his best moment. (However, since Chungle-Down Bim isn’t there, it’s also not his worst.)

~

He is not avoiding The Ball. He is regrouping, coming up with a strategic return and possibly a retaliation for whatever weird, confusing, warm feelings Riz keeps setting fire to in his chest. This is strategy. This is war.

This, frankly, sucks. So much.

The Ball has called four times in the past week before giving up abruptly on Wednesday. It is Sunday afternoon. They usually spend Saturday night watching movies or going to Basrar’s together and then take Sunday to spar (for Fabian) and go over the latest town mystery (for Riz). They have done neither of these things; they also have not texted, spoken or passed each other on the street. Riz is supposed to come over for homework and hot chocolate on weekdays in the winter. He’s supposed to give The Ball rides home every day, to make sure he doesn’t have to walk home in the rain or snow. They’re supposed to be together--

And Fabian has no one to blame for their separation but himself. It twists his gut, seeing The Ball light up his phone so much before the calls stop and he’s left with nothing but unending silence. He can’t seem to stop trying to catch a glimpse of him in the halls at Aguefort, looking for a briefcase or a flat cap, anything, anything. But In the end, he’s the one avoiding The Ball. He’s the one not answering his phone.

He’s the one with weird feelings in his chest.

This cannot, Fabian realizes, possibly go on. He’s having trouble sleeping, and when he does he’s gone back to having nightmares about Riz falling during the Night Yorb debacle. He needs to sort this out, fast.

But Riz is a rogue and so his stealth rolls win out every damn time against Fabian’s perception, and  throughout the next week there’s no time between classes to catch him and he’s nowhere to be found at lunch.

Adaine doesn’t seem too happy with Fabian either, and hasn’t since this weekend. Riz must have said something to her about him, but she relents easily enough when she sees his frantic expression.

“He’s been skipping class to work on that case with his mom for a couple days,” she says. “He--doesn’t really want to see you that much, Fabian.”

It feels like his heart breaks at that, but Fabian smiles winningly anyway. “Who wouldn’t want to see me? I’m Fabian Aramais Seacaster.”

“Son of Bill Seacaster, yeah I know,” Adaine finishes, and at least she’s got that fond exasperation back. “Look, I don’t know what happened between you two, Fabian, but you’ve got to fix it. I can’t take Riz moping around much longer. He’s been insufferable.”

“Leave it to me,” Fabian says with more confidence than he’s feeling, and peels out of the parking lot with a roar from The Hangman.

He thinks maybe things are going to be okay, somehow; he’ll make a suitably dramatic entrance, and he’ll say all the right things to get Riz to forget that Fabian had some kind of crisis for a week and change and didn’t bother to let his best friend in on it and they’ll go back to Seacaster Manor and watch dumb B-movies and everything will be fine and Fabian won’t have to confront this weird thing growing perilously close to his heart.

And then he steps into Riz’s office and faces reality.

“What do you want?” Fabian winces at the flat tone of Riz’s voice, the way his eyes won’t meet Fabian’s, the way he’s crossed his arms over his chest and hunched in on himself.

“I--well--uh, that is--” Fabian pauses, breathes. “I just thought I’d check up on you, since last time I was here you were about to fall asleep on your feet. I heard you were working too late again.”

Riz’s mouth is a flat, thin line. “That’s what you want to talk about? My work habits?”

“Well--I--work-life balance is a very real, serious thing, The Ball. Not everyone can be as healthy and committed to self-care as I am. I thought I would help you out, like always.” This is the part where the movie hero would puff out his chest and the girl would fawn all over him and they’d live happily ever after. Fabian doesn’t really feel up to puffing out his chest when Riz’s eyes go hard and flinty like that.

“It didn’t really seem like you cared about my self-care when you were refusing to acknowledge you loved me.”

Oh. Oh.

And that’s just it, isn’t it? The last piece of the puzzle slots into place, and Fabian is absurdly glad Aelwyn isn’t here to cast Detect Thoughts and laugh at his misery as he realizes what she knew practically from the start. Because he’d said it before--toxic masculinity is over. He’s in touch with his emotions now, and he loves his friends and he’d had a hard time showing it or saying it in the beginning but these days his affirmations roll off his tongue like so much honey so why has he had such a hard time with The Ball?

Of course. Of course he loves Riz. It’s--it’s not even that much of a revelation somehow; it’s like he always knew somewhere deep in his soul that they’d end up like this, with Riz being brilliant and brave and kind and Fabian loving him and loving him and loving him. Admitting it to himself, for how hard it has been to see it clearly in the first place, is easy. It’s like saying the sky is blue or Arthur Aguefort is insane. It’s just a fact. Fabian Aramais Seacaster loves Riz Gukgak.

He’s in love with this strange little goblin man and he’s been so dumb about it.

“Okay, okay,” Fabian says, more to himself than The Ball. What happens now? What is he supposed to do? Should he just come out and say it? Or, no, Riz might think he’s joking, or trying to smooth things over. He'd hate it if Riz thought Fabian didn’t mean it the very first time Fabian says those words. Besides, they’re having an argument--a real one, which he doesn’t think they’ve ever had--and this is so not the time. No, he'll tell him after this is over, when they’ve made up and Fabian has taken care of Riz because he does really look like hell, all bags under his eyes and stiff limbs. He needs to apologize, probably, and then get The Ball somewhere safe and warm and comfortable and then he needs to do something grand and dramatic and then he can tell Riz Gukgak he’s in love with him.

“Look, I’m sorry, alright?” It comes out sharper than he intends, but he’s dealing with wave after wave of astonishment and fear and love and he could use a bit of a break, to be honest. “Can we just forget it?” He has to get this over with to get to the next step of his foolproof, ten second plan to woo The Ball in which nothing can possibly go wrong.

“Forget it?” Riz repeats, incredulous. This is not at all going the way Fabian needs it to go. “You want me to forget the time you took back saying you loved me--when you haven’t even called me your best friend, yet--and drove off and then didn’t talk to me for a week? That’s something you think can just be forgotten? You left Fabian!”

“The Ball--Riz--”

“I’m not just going to let this go, Fabian. No. But if you think that I’m just something to be so easily swept to the side and then picked up again when you feel like it, then--then--great! Great. I see clearly now where I stand with you.”

“Okay,” Fabian declares, because enough really is enough, “it’s sheet time.”

“No, Fabian!”

Riz has never raised his voice outside of crazy group antics before. Not to Fabian, at least. The sheet flutters out of his fingers as Fabian stares, open-mouthed. His chest is cracking again, like it did after Aelwyn broke up with him, but this is worse now; this crack is not just a hairline or a fissure, but a damn canyon. It feels like someone reached inside his ribcage and scooped his heart out.

Riz’s mouth twists and he hugs himself tighter, looking as miserable as Fabian feels. “I don’t want your goddamn sheet, okay? I don’t--I don’t need you to act like I’m some kind of burden or--or--”

“A burden--The Ball--”

“Or calling me The Ball all the time!” Riz’s voice rises again. His fists are clenched now. “I’m--I’m sick of you wrapping me up like a little kid. I’m not a baby, okay? I can take care of myself. I'm fine on my own.”

“Riz,” Fabian tries again, weakly. This can’t happen. Not now. Not to them.

“I think it’s best if you leave now,” Riz says grimly, and turns his back. He doesn’t look around when Fabian closes the door softly behind him.

~

“I’m sorry.”

Fabian blinks.

He and The Ball only had their fight two hours ago; he’d got on The Hangman and ignored the bike's probing questions, and gone home and cried and then he’d gotten up and done what he’d thought Riz would do in his place. He made a clue board.

First on the board is the picture of himself and Riz taken the night the Night Yorb was defeated; Fig had snapped a shot without them knowing, of the two of them talking in the firelight, Fabian craning his neck to look down at a swaddled, comfortable looking Riz who was looking up at him, mouth open seemingly in mid-sentence. His hair is in his face and Fabian always looks at it and remembers how seconds afterward he’d reached up and pushed the curls out of Riz’s eyes gently. That was the end of the summer--it’s the middle of winter now. He’s been in love with his best friend at least since then, maybe before.

Next on the board is his half of the best friend necklace; he’d actually stolen it out of Riz’s briefcase on their way to fight the Nightmare King. It was after Fallinel, when he was getting back to himself, reinventing how he saw the world. He’d wanted to know--to have something, just a small thing, that reminded Fabian who really loved him. And Riz had been there.

So. Maybe he was a little in love with Riz back then, too.

The third clue was actually absent from the board, but Fabian writes it on a post-it note and sticks that there in its place; my old letter jacket. He’d gotten a new one when he’d been on the team in the beginning of sophomore year; he’d filled out too much, built up enough muscle from practice that he hadn’t been able to keep using the one his father gave him freshman year. He’d given it to The Ball because he was complaining of the cold one day and then just. Never bothered to take it back.

Riz wears it to his games sometimes. It makes Fabian--feel. Certain things. It’s fine.

The final clue is, of course, the sheet. He almost doesn’t bother pinning that one up either, since it’s pretty fucking obvious. Aelwyn could see it all just from the way he wrapped Riz up in his sheet, after all; he really doesn't need to rest of his clues to figure this out. But there’s something soothing in this, in looking at the world the way he knows Riz looks at it.

He’s just working himself up to maybe crying again when Cathilda knocks on his door and lets Riz quietly into the room.

“What?” Fabian says, because what?

Riz is biting his lip, which is entirely too distracting, when he speaks again. “I was--unfair. And a dick. And I've been--going through some stuff and I put all that on you, and I’m sorry, man. You didn’t deserve that.”

“No, I--I mean, I’m sorry too. I mean--you don’t need to be sorry, because I should be sorry. I just left you hanging and then spaced on you and I didn’t even tell you why, I just wanted to go back to normal. So I’m the one who’s sorry and you can’t take that from me. I’ll fight you if you try, just so you know. Stop being sorry.”

And just like that, the corners of Riz’s mouth turn up which is a relief because Fabian love him and just figured out that he’s maybe been in love with him for over a year, but he also knows that even before he knew he was in love he’d have done just about anything to make sure Riz never looked as sad as he does right now. He’d kill to put a smile on Riz’s face.

“I don’t think you can just have a monopoly on apologizing, Fabian,” Riz says and the way his name sounds out of The Ball’s mouth, gods, how did Fabian not realize this sooner? “I’ve just been--I’ve been dealing with a lot and you’re my best friend, man, and I just...It sucks not talking to you.”

“Yeah,” Fabian agrees. “It really fucking does.”

And then, opening his arms tentatively, “Can I?”

Riz’s face twists horribly then, and Fabian’s heart has just enough time to sink to his stomach before Riz throws himself into Fabian’s arms. Fabian holds him and holds him and doesn’t ever want to let go now, he’s got Riz and he’s pressing his face into Riz’s hair and lifting him up and holding him close to his chest and Riz is wrapping his arms around Fabian’s shoulders, claws scratching at the back of Fabian’s neck, he’s whispering into that twitching ear, “I’ve got you, I’ve got you, I’ve got you, it’s okay, I’ve got you,” and he loves and loves and loves and he doesn’t know if it’s supposed to hurt so sweetly but it does.

“I’m sorry, gods, I’m sorry,” Riz babbles into his shoulder and Fabian wants to tell him to stop but he’d have to interrupt to do that and he can’t, not when he knows Riz has such a hard time with the idea that his friends don’t listen to him. He folds at the knees instead, takes Riz with him to the ground and cradles him like something precious because that’s what The Ball is and has always been, precious and so important and, if he has his way, Fabian’s. “I’m sorry I acted like you didn’t care, I know you do, I just don’t want to ever make you feel like you have to do everything for me, like I’m weak or less than or like I don't get that you have other things, other people to take care of--”

And then Fabian does interrupt because like hell is he letting this slide. “Stop it, stop, I know you’re strong and you’re brave and you’re so smart, Riz, gods, you’re brilliant. I just-- I wanna take care of you, I know I don’t have to but I want to, I love to, I love you, I'm in love with you and I want to take care of you, please.”

It’s only when Riz rears his head back that Fabian realizes what just came tumbling out of his mouth.

“Oh, shit. Uh--I wasn’t supposed to say that yet.”

“Yet?” Riz squeaks and fuck it, Fabian decides. Fuck it all. In for a penny, in for a dime.

“Yeah, yet,” Fabian rushes. His fingers clench and release the fabric over Riz’s spine rhythmically and he can feel the goblin shivering against his chest and without thinking Fabian pulls down his sheet and wraps them both in it. Riz’s skin stands out dark and forest green against the silvery material and he hopes he likes it, hopes it is soft and warm against the thin, fragile surface of Riz’s cheek because Riz is so good and Fabian loves him and he deserves nice things. “I--I was gonna make a plan and strategize and not tell you until I’ve done at least three heroic deeds in your name, dude. I had so many ideas.”

“Ideas?” Riz’s voice is faint.

Fabian nods solemnly. “There were also schematics for a dramatic duel on the clifftops, but we’ve already done that a couple times, so I scrapped it.”

“Too much of a Nightmare King-Night Yorb repeat.”

“Yeah,” Fabian nods. “Exactly. So uh. Just. If you could pretend I haven’t said that yet, I can get on the heroic deeds and we can revisit this. Conversation. Uh, later.”

“Right,” Riz says, nodding slowly too. “Or we could, like, do it right now. Since I'm in love with you too and everything.”

Fabian’s brain stops working.

“Oh.”

“'Oh?' That’s it?”

“I, uh, didn’t plan for this.”

“You didn’t plan for me maybe liking you back? Dude, everybody knows already.”

Fabian draws further away at that, blinking wildly. (His hands stay on Riz’s hip and back because he’s got him now, he’s got him, Riz is in his home and his arms and his heart and wrapped in Fabian’s protection and he’s never leaving if Fabian has anything to say about it.) “Everyone?”

Riz scuffs the back of his neck and his ears are turning turquoise again. “Uh, yeah, man. Adaine told me if I complain about how much I like your eyes to her one more time she’s gonna get Fig to hex me. I um, I thought maybe you were doing the whole sheet thing to, like, let me down easy. Make me see you didn’t think of me as more than like, a kid or someone who needs your help or something.”

“Oh my gods. That is so dumb,” Fabian blurts, because what the fuck, The Ball, seriously. “That is so dumb The Ball. You’re so dumb.”

“Gee, thanks. I really feel like you love me right now, just so you know. Just overwhelming amounts of love pouring out right now.”

“Oh shut up.” Fabian says, laughing. “I wrap you in my sheet because I love you, The Ball. Like, more than I think I’ve ever liked anyone. It’s how Aelwyn knew we were over.”

“Huh?”

“She broke up with me and told me I never wrapped her in my sheet because I was always doing that to you.” Fabian explains, not even bothering to be embarrassed. “Because I've been in love with you for like, forever, man. She just realized it first because I always wanted to use the sheet on you and not my own girlfriend.”

“Oh,” Riz replies, sounding breathless. All things considered, Fabian’s going to take that as a good sign. He leans in now, presses his forehead to the crook of Riz’s neck, and breathes. Riz smells like newspaper and ink and old coffee and Fabian loves him so much. He tilts his head, nosing at the detective’s collar, and slides his lips over warm skin. He lets his teeth catch there, just a hint. “Oh.”

And then, before Fabian can even move, Riz’s hand is in his hair, tangled up in the strands, and he says, very fast, “By the way I’m demisexual, it’s on the asexuality spectrum and I was also being weird because I didn’t know how to deal with how attracted I am to you!”

“Okay,” Fabian says easily, drawing back. “Do you want to have a conversation about it? Because I don’t think I’m your guy for that, but we could go to the LGBT group meeting with Kristen next week and see if they have any resources. Jawbone could probably help too.”

Riz’s pupils are dilating slowly and his mouth hangs open before he snaps out of it. He looks less miserable now but still unsure and it’s not a good look on him. Fabian desperately wants to erase it. “That’s it? You’re not--you don’t think I’m weird?”

“Of course you’re weird, The Ball, but not for that. Besides, I think starting a relationship--we are starting a relationship, right--” Riz nods frantically, the beginnings of a grin forming, and Fabian pauses to lean in and press his mouth to the corner of Riz’s, “with the only problem being you don’t know what to do with all the insanely hot attraction you have for me is, like, the opposite of a hardship, dude.”

He stops then, considers, and then something terrible occurs to Fabian. He pulls even farther back and splays his fingers across Riz’s chest, feels his heart rabbiting there under his fingertips, and says quickly, “Not that I need you to have any kind of--any of that kind of attraction to me, Riz. I’d be okay, you know, with just this. Although you may have to tell me how hot I am from time to time. For, you know, moral support.”

Tension seems to drain out of Riz, has been since Fabian first started speaking, and this time it’s his turn to lean in and brush his lips across Fabian’s mouth. Fabian lets out a breath, takes in the scent of old newsprint and coffee and realizes he could die happy here. “You are, in fact, very hot, Fabian. And--thank you. For understanding. I might--I’m not super interested in sex, but. It’s a maybe. If you’d like it to be, for the future.”

“Of course I would, you’re incredibly attractive. But it’s not that big a deal,” Fabian says, and he picks them both up off the floor.

The sheet comes with them, sparks playing along the skin of his forearms but never burning him as he sets Riz down on the mattress because Riz is good and perfect and loves Fabian and deserves better than to sit on the floor. He doesn’t hesitate like he usually would now, and curls up around Riz, pulls the sheet over them both, encases them and pulls Riz close, closer, closest. “I love you. I’m probably not going to stop saying it now, just so you know. I’m going to be very annoying about it.”

Riz reaches up and brushes his claws lightly over Fabian’s brow and his smile is so soft something in Fabian melts. “It’s a good thing I love you then, or I’d never be able to put up with it.”

[kristenbeeapples]

I wrote a little something for @d20-weeks figayda week! hope u like it!

day 3: date night

‘Fig,’ Ayda calls over her shoulder, casting lightning bolt at one of the demons attacking them, ‘I presume the answer is no, but just to confirm: is combat an expected element of a first date?’

Fig hellish rebukes the demon who just slashed into her. ‘No,’ she huffs, whipping out her bass. ‘First dates are supposed to be fun and cute, not full of stupid, ugly demons!’ She punctuates each word in the sentence with a pluck of her bass strings and casts shatter on the cluster of demons in front of them, sending most of them sprawling on their asses down the hill where she’s set up the picnic blanket.

Ayda nods sagely. ‘I thought as much,’ she says. ‘There was nothing about this in my preparatory reading.’

‘You did reading for this?’ Fig says, feeling her mouth curve into a smile despite her frustration.

‘Yes,’ Ayda says, and then squawks as one of the demons gets a nasty hit on her. Fig’s heart leaps in fear but before she can do anything Ayda unleashes another spell that fully eviscerates the two in front of her. ‘Well,’ she continues, as if nothing has happened – fuck, she’s so cool – ‘I was going to do reading, and then I asked Adaine for help, and she convinced me that audio-visual research would be more informative.’

‘Audio-visual….’ Fig says, shredding on her guitar and injuring another demon, then surreptitiously casts a healing word on Ayda as a bonus action. ‘You guys watched romcoms?’

‘If that is a fun shortening of ‘romantic comedy’, then yes.’ Ayda blasts another spell. ‘Some of them were quite enjoyable, if unfortunately heterosexual. But none of them had demons.’

Fig half-laughs, and with a well-placed booming blade kills the last demon in front of them. ‘No, I’ll bet not.’

Ayda takes her hand, surveying the damage. The picnic blanket is tattered and stained with an unpleasant mix of viscera and what was supposed to be their dinner, all the salad and fancy bread and cheese and fruit ruined. The picnic basket Fig had borrowed (well, stolen) from her mom is smoking.

‘Are you hurt?’ Ayda asks.

‘No,’ Fig says. ‘Are you?

Ayda shakes her head. ‘A very special someone healed me, I think.’

‘Mmm.’ Fig kicks at the dismembered head of a nearby demon.  ‘Sorry I ruined our date.’

Ayda furrows her brow. ‘I do not follow. We were attacked by demons. How are you at fault?’

‘Because I’m an archdevil, and all these demons are mad at me,’ Fig says. ‘They attacked us because of me. They hurt you because of me.’

‘Fig,’ Ayda says, taking her other hand and looking at her with bright, fiery eyes. ‘I do not blame you in the slightest, and also I think you are brilliant. I will gladly fight whatever demons come your way. They will be no match for an Archdevil Princess of the Nine Hells and her succubus, the wizard Ayda Aguefort.’

Fig melts. ‘Thank you, Ayda,’ she says, and leans up to press a kiss to her girlfriend’s lips. She draws back and watches the sparks from Ayda’s hair fly up into the sky, the same colour as the setting sun behind her. Really, she thinks, who cares about demons and devils and her heritage when she’s with the most beautiful person in the world? 

‘If you want,’ she says, ‘We can finish our date at home? We could watch a romcom. I bet Kristen knows some good gay ones.’

‘That sounds wonderful,’ Ayda says. She looks around at the remains of the picnic. ‘Should we clean this up, or…?’

‘Eh, screw it,’ Fig says, leading her back down the hill to Mordred Manor. ‘It can wait. It’s date night.’