#well. no there are still pretty high notes for the violin too

[tsukasageorge]

Gonna try to arrange world's end valentine in beepbox. Will give up after 20 minutes. Wish me luck

[alastor-simp]

Ciel Phantomhive and Sebastian Michaelis Reacting to a reader who sings like Japanese singer “Ado”

Deciding to try doing another fandom, so I’m gonna do black butler. Only doing Sebby and Ciel since I’m more in tune on how to write them compared to the other characters. Gonna continue the Ado series with them too. I know that this was the Victorian Era so they didn't have stuff like Youtube, so I'm gonna try to change it a bit, and not include that. Enjoy everyone :)

Ciel Phantomhive♟️

♟️Ciel had many duties to attend to as he was the head of Phantomhive manor along with being the Queen’s Watchdog. Apart from filling out paperwork for his company, he had many hobbies that Sebastian help teach him like hunting or playing the violin.

♟️He had met you by Lizzy, as she had found you during one of her strolls in London. You were a frail little thing, but you had a certain amount of skills, so Ciel decided to hire you as a maid for the manor. Hopefully your skills you be much better then the other three. You were a fast learner, and quickly adapted to life at the manor. Both him and Sebastian were impressed with how well you handle your tasks.

♟️Ciel was on his way back to his office when he heard the sound of someone singing. Curious, he headed to wear the sound was coming from and made his way over to one of the rooms which had the door slightly open. Ciel peeked in and saw you in the middle of the room, leaning against the window. You had just finished up dusting the area and decided to take a small break, and while in your break, you started singing as it was something you loved to do.

♟️Once you finished, you heard the sound of clapping and turned to see Lord Phantomhive, leaning against the door with a small smile on his face. “Ahh, Young Master, I was just um-”, you were flustered and tried to explain yourself, but Ciel just put his hand up, which made you stop talking

♟️ “I am not upset with you, y/n. I’m very surprised actually. You never told me you could sing.” Ciel said as he walked closer towards you, standing next to the window. You went on to explain to him that you always loved singing, but you had a slight problem with revealing yourself to everyone as you preferred keeping your identity hidden.

♟️Ciel listened to you and he smiled softly, walking closer to you and grabbed your hand, holding it tightly. He said that you were very talented and should pursue what you loved doing instead of working as a maid. You would still live in the manor, but he would do everything he can to support you in anyway. He knew that hiding your identity would be a challenge, but he assume that maybe a mask would be beneficial to hide your identity.

♟️After that, Ciel would host events at the manor where he would have you perform in front of all of the guests. Everyone was blown away by you that all of the nobles were gossiping about who you were. Pretty soon, you were getting requests to perform at theaters and balls. Everyone was referring to you as the mysterious singer since no one could see your face when you performed, but no one really question it.

♟️Ciel was happy for you that you were achieving your dreams and he was glad to assist in any way with events. He also would like to know what was the new song you were working on, as he was feeling giddy, but he tried to tried to hide it to avoid teasing from Sebastian.

♟️His favorite song that you sang was a cover you did called " Crime & Punishment". He wasn't familiar with that genre of music, but he did enjoy it, and loved how high you went with certain notes in the song.

Sebastian Michaelis😈

😈Sebastian had many duties to fulfill for his young master. There was many tasks he had to play, playing his role as a butler for the manor while also serving as the demon contractor/protector for the young masters soul. Tasks like this for a human would be difficult, but for Sebastian it was nothing.

😈Since Sebastian as been around for a long time, he possessed many talents and skills, ranging from speaking Latin, horseback riding, and playing certain instruments. He was tasked with teaching the young master these things as he was the Lord of Phantomhive manor, though his skills for the violin needed a lot of work.

😈Sebastian had met you during one of his strolls in London. He was on his way back from receiving supplies, when he passed an alley and saw you being held against the wall by three men, with knives. Ahh humans, always so greedy that they would resort to stealing from a young maiden. It all happen so quick, one second you were being threatened by these guys for money then all of a sudden, all three of the men ended being knocked out, and a tall handsome man wearing a suit was in front of you. You thanked him for helping you, and went out of your way to say you were looking for a place to work, to which led you to being introduce to Ciel Phantomhive and becoming a maid for the manor.

😈Sebastian noticed that you were nothing like the other three workers, as you didn't possess any secret skills, but he did appreciate how quick you were to learn and perform your tasks at the manor. There was something about you that drew you to him, he wasn't sure what it was, but he figured there was more too you then just being a regular human.

😈Upon leaving the young masters study after serving him his afternoon tea, Sebastian started to make his way back to the kitchen to prepare the evening meal, and to make sure Bard wasn't using the flamethrower again. He stopped once he heard the sounds of someone singing nearby. Curious, he ventured closer to where the singing was coming from, and noticed that one of the doors was opened slightly. Peeking his head through the door, Sebastian saw you in the middle of the room, dusting one of the shelves, while singing a random melody.

😈"Oya, this human is very interesting", Sebastian thought as he entered the room slowly as not to disturb your singing. Upon turning around after you finished dusting, you dropped the feather duster in shock and covered your mouth as you realized Sebastian was in the room and heard you singing: "S-sebastian! U-um I was um-." Stumbling over your words, you were unable to explain anything to him, and quickly ducked your head down in embarrassment. Chuckling, Sebastian walked closer towards you, lifting your head by placing his fingers on your chin: "Your singing is quite beautiful, Y/N. How come you never told me or the young master you could sing?"

😈Looking away from his gorgeous eyes, you explained to him that you always loved singing, but you preferred to sing in private, or sing where no one could tell it was you. You apologized again if you had distracted him from his duties, but Sebastian just shook his head and smiled saying there was no need to apologize for something like this, but he still wondered why you decided to work as a maid and not a singer.

😈After that, Sebastian explained what had happened with the young master about your hidden talents and insisted in a plan that could benefit both his company and your dream. Ciel was surprised that Sebastian had taken an interest in you, but he didn't think to hard on it and listened to what plan Sebastian had in mind.

😈The both of them discussed the plan with you to be a private singer for the Funtom company. Whenever they would travel to an event for one of the other lords, they would have you there to sing and entertain the guests with your beautiful singing, in disguise of course as you were insistent that you wanted your appearance hidden from everyone. Word spread quickly over the streets of London about the mysterious singer of the Funtom company, including reaching the Queen herself as she was amazed by this singer and sent a letter to Lord Phantomhive herself, requesting the mysterious singer to attend the next ball/event she would plan.

😈Sebastian was quite pleased with how well things were going. Not only was the young masters company becoming extremely popular now, but also you were able to do what you loved which was sing. Of course, Sebastian had to make sure your needs were met and made sure you were not overworking yourself too much as what kind of butler would he be if he didn't provide the best care for you.

😈His favorite song of yours is "Domestic De Violence" . He finds the melody to be very beautiful and finds the lyrics to be very manipulating, but in a good way for him.

[ziorite]

buckle up lads— i’ve played cello since before kindergarten and even if i’m no virtuoso, i’m about to unleash my thoughts on the scheherazade job upon the world anyways.

look, if hardison was good enough to play the scheherzade solo at fourteen there’s just no way he sounds that shit even if he hasn’t touched the instrument for ten years. he’s supposed to have been the most promising violinist in the city which has to be stiff competition because most classically trained string players start playing young. like three to five years old young. and we know hardison was a foster kid so he almost certainly started later than most. obviously he was talented, but now he can’t even play a scale? it just doesn’t make sense to me from what i know. i’ve gone a month without touching my cello and pretty much hopped straight back into the stuff i was practicing before after fifteen minutes of warm up. the knowledge of how to hold a bow and pull it across the string and make quality sound is the kind that doesn’t leave you— for anyone of teenage hardison’s supposed skill, that instinct is part of you for LIFE. so no, the persistent portrayal of present day hardison as completely incompetent just doesn’t sit right with me.

but that doesn’t mean i think he could pull off scheherazade’s solo without nate’s rather convenient hypnosis. so i googled around and here’s the sheet music:

to be honest i thought it would be absolute batshit crazy the way they treated it in the show. the shifts are kind of crazy but i can see a very dedicated fourteen year old who practiced the shit out of this solo being able to play it. not to say it’s not still hard! there are some SERIOUS high notes that you’d be hard pressed to hit perfectly every time even with weeks of practice under your belt. shit makes me sweat and i don’t even play that instrument.

it’s a damn impressive solo for a teenager to be playing and an absolutely deranged one to try and perform on such little notice. that’s why i need someone to rewrite the scheherazade job with more focus on hardison and his violin dammit! i feel like hardison would be able to bluff his way through the other parts of the piece with enough practice in the time he has before the job, but there’s just no way he’d be able to play that solo on his own after ten years of not touching the violin. he might not even be able to practice during all the time he has— his calluses would be gone!! that’s a whole other story!!

string instruments strings are vicious y’all. and a VAST majority of the scheherazade solo is on the teeny tiny e string that basically slices through raw fingertips. i can barely make it through five minutes of dedicated practice shifting around on my thinnest string and i’ve had my calluses built up for years; i can file these babies with a nail file and poke a hot pan with them— they get pretty damn thick, and hardison’s working with nuthin y’all. you can only go so far before you give yourself an actual blister you physically cannot play on.

as a result, i feel like hardison would’ve let nate hypnotize him if ONLY the oily little slime ball (with hate and love) had told him. i really don’t understand why nate didn’t say anything until the first place. aren’t they supposed to have learned that you’re not supposed to con your own crew already?? (not that i think nate would ever really take that to heart.)

anyways, that’s my hardison-should-be-better-at-violin propaganda as well as my why-the-scheherazade-job-needs-to-be-rewritten manifesto. maybe i’ll write it myself one of these days— leverage brainrot is real and it is a sickness. hope this 2 am rant didn’t disrupt anyone’s dashes too much!

[sirianasims]

As I stood there, surrounded by moving boxes and the lingering smell of fresh paint, a mixture of excitement and trepidation coursed through me. This space was all mine now, a place to prove that I could succeed on my own terms.

And I simply had to succeed. My sisters had graduated years ago, Hailey and her husband would have a baby any day now, and Ivy was opening a dance studio in Windenburg. Liam and Kieran were doing great in high school and were definitely both planning to go to university as well.

I was always the odd child. The only one who wasn’t interested in any sports, the only one who wasn’t top of my class in anything. And now I was the only one who wasn’t going to university.

My parents were a little surprised when I announced that I wasn’t going to Britechester as planned and that I wanted to try and make it as a content creator, but they were supportive. I guess they always expected me to be different in this too.

I posted an update to my followers, but felt restless. Maybe I was deluding myself. What if I failed? What if I couldn’t grow my channel, or if I couldn’t even make enough money to pay for food and utilities? I wandered around the apartment aimlessly for a while, putting away a few things while I tried to silence the doubts creeping into my mind.

It was quiet, but not really. I could hear the traffic outside, people talking, and somewhere, someone was playing the violin. There was so much life out there compared to the empty apartment. A sudden need to get out overwhelmed me and I grabbed my jacket.

San Myshuno was so different to Copperdale, bright lights and colours everywhere. Even though it was still early spring, it was less chilly than I was used to up north.

A street vendor was yelling and the most delicious smells came from her stall. Street food hadn’t really been a thing in Copperdale and I was pretty excited to live in a city where I could go out and buy food this close to midnight.

My mother had made sure to stock my kitchen but I decided to celebrate my first night in San Myshuno by treating myself. It was a brand new feeling. Freedom!

I ordered some Bhel Puri. The smell brought me back to dinners at Myra’s house, her dad cooking the most amazing things while her mom helped us with homework.

Back when Myra was still my best friend.

I shrugged off the nostalgia. I was making new friends now, and if Myra didn’t want to talk to me, that was her own decision.

I took a quick selfie with my food and posted it, making a mental note to set up my equipment first thing tomorrow so I could get back to streaming. Most of my university fund had been spent on the apartment and while I did have some money left over, it wouldn’t last forever.

I couldn’t afford to lose momentum.

As I posted one last update before bed, the silence struck me again. No brothers yelling and running up and down the stairs, no parents laughing in the kitchen. I suddenly felt very alone.

I stared into the darkness, refusing to cry. All I heard was the faint buzz of the city outside the heavy brick walls. And then, something else. The violinist was back.

I smiled as I felt myself starting to drift away on the soothing tones. You’re never truly alone in San Myshuno.

beginning / previous / next

[ceallachs]

Redesigned Fantasy AU Akira 🍁👑

→ Akira 🍁 BakuTodo Love Child

He is a bit different from the usual Akira I draw in MHA timeline; you can read more about him below!

. .

Some Trivia:

The Crown Prince and son of the current rulers, Bakugou Katsuki & Todoroki Shouto.

Akira is fluent in both Northern and Southern dialects. He more commonly speaks and writes in Northern dialect (Shouto’s language) unless speaking with Katsuki, with whom he uses the latter.

He is a seasoned ice magic user but is also skilled in swords.

He can play a variety of instruments such as piano and violin, taught to him by his parents.

Kirishima Zen is his personal attendant and bodyguard.

-------------------------------------

"Your Highness, someone here came to visit you," Zen calls out into the room before opening the door wider, whispering a small 'go on' as a girl takes a step inside.

“Y-Your Highness!" she chirps in a small voice, tucking a stray lock of hair behind her ear before quickly adjusting her hold on the box in her hands. "My a-apologies for interrupting your morning tea. The King had this delivered for you, so um, ah…"

Akira turns a page from his book, eyes not leaving the text, but he makes a casual gesture to one of the seats in the room. “Thank you. You can leave it there."

Miki is a cheerful young girl, bright eyes and all smiles. Zen had the pleasure of meeting her the night before and had witnessed her excitement fitting into her new uniform. But now in front of the prince, she is quite demure. Understandable; this is her first time speaking with Akira and she is close to his age.

"O-Okay!"

Her cheeks turn pink as she scrambles into the room to deposit the box on an empty seat. She gets distracted through it, slowed in her movements to observe the prince in silent awe, and almost peers at him under his fringe once she's close.

"Is there anything else?"

"N-No! I mean – thank you, Your Highness!" Miki backs away and straightens up in a panic, pushing her palms down her skirt to mask a nervous laugh. "I’ll be going now!" She does a little curtsy then, pausing once more to get one last look at Akira before turning for the door. Zen gives her an approving grin and a thumbs up on her way out, and takes note of her own smile reaching from ear to ear.

"Who was that?" Akira asks once they're alone. He hasn't moved from his seat, seemingly still absorbed in his book, but Zen sees him visibly relax when he lifts his cup to his lips.

“The grandchild of the retired Misaki-san, she started work today. Very excitable, that one. Cute, too." Zen chuckles as he glances at the box she left behind; he guesses it's an item of clothing considering the size and the large bow tied around it. "You could have asked her yourself, you know. You didn’t even look at her. Honestly, as the heir, you should set an example to–”

Akira sets his cup back down on the saucer, the punctuated clink of it, though not harsh, interrupting Zen's words. “I won't be taking over the throne until the next few decades.”

Zen smiles inwardly and tips the teapot over Akira’s empty cup. The clink of ceramic and the wisp of book pages fill the silence between them, and after a beat, Zen says, “Your eyes really are pretty. You can’t blame anyone who wants to look.”

Akira spares him a glance, the first of the day, clearly not pleased but not quite angry either. More exasperated than anything. Specks of silver and gold glint in his gray and crimson eyes, beauty and emotion manifested in one look and proving Zen's point – not that anyone but he can see this right now.

Sighing, Akira leans back on his chair and rests the side of his jaw on his knuckles. Zen almost mourns the loss of Akira’s gaze when his eyelids flutter close, his book now left forgotten on his lap.

"Well, I'm not going to tell you her name, so you can ask her yourself once you see her again. Introduce yourself like a good prince." Zen says playfully as he takes the novel from Akira’s lap, closes it, and places it on the table instead. He sees Akira's brows furrow but doesn't make an effort to retort and it feels like a victory, somewhat. "She's not going to turn into stone if you look at her."

"You don't understand."

Akira doesn't elaborate, and it stays quiet for the rest of the morning.

-------------------------------------

Context:

* Heterochromia is known to be an extremely rare physical feature, said to be blessed only to those of royal blood as evidenced by one of the current rulers, Todoroki Shouto, and his ancestors before him. Although such a feature is a symbol of nobility, power, and prestige, Akira considers his heterochromia as a source of insecurity. Everyone knows who he is, and those who don’t, need only to look at his eyes. He feels that his eyes hinder how people treat him and even to some extent judge him for it, so he has started avoiding making direct eye contact with anyone who is not familiar with him unless necessary. He also started growing his hair out a bit for the same reason, finding it helps to “hide” his eyes.

[violin-check]

Hi! I’m just curious about Rocky from Lackadaisy, and if there’s any inaccuracies in his playing within the pilot.

[I.D: Screenshot of Lackadaisy where Rocky plays violin on a bridge. Behind him is one of the bridge's support beams and a view of a river, the moon, and a city on the river banks. His bow is on the strings, a little closer to the frog than the tip. End I.D]

Admittedly I'm not familiar with this show, but I did go ahead and find this scene of him playing violin, and honestly, I'm pretty impressed with how it's animated. There seems to be a good deal of care and attention put into how Rocky plays, and there's a couple things that I really appreciated.

[I.D. Two screenshots side by side of Rocky playing violin. His bow sits on the strings at the tip as he shifts to about fifth position, his hand moving to rest against the body of the instrument. End I.D.]

First of all: shifting. It's a pretty common thing in more advanced violin music, but isn't necessarily shown that much. It's really nice seeing it show up, especially in such a casual moment of a guy playing for himself as he monologues. He's not performing for anyone, but he's still playing well.

Another example of his variety in technique: in the clip, he uses his left hand (bow hand) to pluck the strings at one point, and plays double stops (two strings at once) at a few others. I get the sense listening to the music he's playing that he knows what he's doing, and is probably a decently advanced musician. Also, the music that he plays is impressive, as he basically seems to be improvising in this scene. He's messing around, basically, but there's solid technique behind it.

There's also a lot of attention paid to which string he's playing on- the angle of the bow is very different for the higher notes and the lower notes, meaning that the animators were actually paying attention to how a violin would be played. For example, in the above screenshots, he's playing on the E string (high notes), and has a mostly vertical bow. I also appreciate the fluidity of his bowing in the clip, especially the wrist position and movements.

There are a couple of shots in the clip where the proportions of the violin seem off- mostly at the start, when it looks too big for him. There's some weird bow hand positions are some points, and also a few places where the fingering seems a bit off. A lot of the time his fingers don't really seem to be changing the string they're on, but that's a matter of trying to animate super precise motions that most people wouldn't notice so I'll let it slide lol. (And to be fair, fingering probably works different when you have less fingers anyway. Maye his violin would be tuned differently than a real one?)

His violin doesn't seem to have a chin rest and he isn't using a shoulder rest either, but again, that makes sense from an animation standpoint. Besides, while those are common in modern day playing, this show has more of a historical distant past setting from what I can tell.

My overall vibe from this character is that he clearly knows what he's doing with his violin, but that he's also just playing for himself. He's not performing, he's not trying to impress anyone, he's just playing violin and enjoying it. I might be a little more critical of a few areas of weird technique if he were supposed to be playing an existing piece or performing for an audience, but overall I think for the most part the breaks in technique match the general air of carelessness/ carefreeness Rocky is giving off.

I do, however, question how often he would have to replace his strings given that long nails are a no-no with violins, and he has obviously pointed claws. He probably breaks his strings fairly often lol.

[themysteriousauthor18]

PT. 1

1985 Louisiana New Orleans. The French Quarter.

“Good morning, New Orleans! My name is Alastor, and I’ll be your brand new host for this morning broadcast! We’ll be taking some calls later, but for now I’d like to play you one of my favorite songs. Please enjoy!”

An upbeat jazzy tune begins to play. A little outdated for the time period but hey, radio itself was pretty outdated.

The man crouching by the radio hums along to the tune. “Interesting.. He managed to do it.” He’d been hearing about Alastor a lot recently; an up-and-coming star in the radio industry. Only the age of 19, and he had already become a fan favorite.

            That singular thought in the man’s mind swept away as he closed his eyes, listening to the music. 

This man is Lucifer Morningstar. 

He is a young 18-year-old, and the heir to his family's fortune. Everything about his appearance screams privileged. He has short blonde hair that’s always gelled back, his white skin hadn’t a blemish on it; smooth as a newborn's skin. His amber eyes are soft, relaxed. His body’s dressed to the nines in a collection of gold and white. Although right now, in place of the full suit he’s shedded his overcoat to reveal the pink striped vest. Which is laying open. 

The music picks up a bit more. It had started off with upbeat piano, and now a blend of trumpets and saxophones were carrying the melody. An undertone of trombones added the bass, and soft drums kept the beat. A hint of clarinets top it off with the high notes. This goes on for a bit before a smooth yet fast-paced violin solo picks up the melody. Overall, it's a really fun song, considering it's from a time period that was over sixty years ago. Everyone nowadays prefers rock.

 He pushes off the dresser the crimson radio is sitting on and begins to dance with himself around the large bedroom as the trumpets take over again. It's way too big - in his opinion - to even be a bedroom. I mean, who needs a room the size of a gas station? Hell, this place was like his own personal apartment. He had his bed, his bathroom, his balcony, his..

Okay, yeah…this is too much room. Like, waaaaay too much. 

But when the radio plays, the music seems to take up all the unnecessary space. He likes music, he likes swaying to it. He likes using all the extra room to needlessly dance around. It’s…fun. 

A loud bang suddenly comes from behind him and he flinches. The large wooden doors were thrown open so hard they hit the wall. Lucifer turns to find his doppelganger staring him down, his nose wrinkling at the upbeat jazzy music. “Turn that off.” He scolds. “You're supposed to be practicing ballroom dancing, not…that.” He gestured to Lucifer’s random twirling around the room that he was doing.

 Michael Morningstar. Lucifer's spitting image…no literally. They’re identical twins - well, except for their eye color. They look the exact same at a first glance aside from Michael having dark eyes as opposed to Lucifer's bright blue eyes. Everything else, however, is the same. Their jawlines, their facial structures, their body types…Truthfully, the only way anyone could tell them apart without paying close attention - if they were to cover their eyes, of course - is their mannerisms. 

Lucifer sighs, “come on, brother. My tutor isn’t even here. How am I supposed to practice without her?” 

Michael’s posture is perfect, while Lucifer is slouched at the shoulders. His hair is gelled back too, while Lucifer’s is sticking out in random directions now. “I don’t care.” He states. “You know what you're expected to do. Now do it.”

Lucifer walks to his brother, and without warning he grabs his hands and pulls them towards him. The loud jazzy music is still playing through his room. “Come on, brother,” Lucifer says joyfully with a bright smile. “Come dance with me, let's have a bit of fun!”

Michael rips his hands away at the word fun, like Lucifer just said something foul. Lucifer watches in dismay as Michael shrinks back to the doorway. “Just turn it off. You have to meet with our father soon anyway. Clean yourself up and meet me in the dining room.” 

There isn’t another word on the matter because Michael is already closing the door. It roars with a louder slam than expected as it closes and Lucifer stands there, defeated. From the radio, the jazzy song starts to slow; yet to Lucifer, it's far away now. He’d been cruelly ripped from whatever fantasy he was just in. Dejected, Lucifer walks over to the radio and quickly turns the knob, silencing the radio and thus the room. 

Michael is the brother the family wishes was their heir. He’s everything they could possibly want. Perfect posture, perfect actions, perfect teeth, perfect manners. Perfect. Perfect. Perfect. Perfect. Perfect everything. 

Then there was him.

Lucifer. 

The odd child to the Morningstars. The one that acts as a normal teen, all things considered. The one that likes to have fun, play pranks, sneak out with friends and go partying. While Michael preferred to attend the business meetings, Lucifer wanted to go out and party. Where Michael preferred classical music, Lucifer liked loud energetic jazz and some rock. Where Michael wanted to eat a high-class lobster dinner prepared by the finest chefs, Lucifer would gladly take a greasy burger from a diner, or hell, some macaroni and cheese with chicken strips.

The point here is that while they look practically the same, they couldn’t be more different. If Lucifer was being honest, he does wish Michael was the heir, and he knows Michael wants to be the heir, too. If they had the same eye color, he would gladly agree to switch places - hell, even identities with him - if it means he doesn't have to be forced to do all this boring stuff. That he doesn't have to put up a front, to pretend to be something he isn't. Deep down, Lucifer knows his father would probably have switched them too, given the choice. If not for their one - very clearly different - physical trait.

Maybe Lucifer could have gotten eye surgery or something when they were younger to change their eye colors. If that was even possible? Or maybe he could've worn color-changing contacts while out in public? That would've been much easier. 

           But now, he’s sure it was too late to try anything. They’re older, and the difference in their mannerisms are too noticeable to the public. The public even knew Lucifer as the oddball to the Morningstars. The one who's more kind to the lower class, more goofy. Whereas Michael was the colder of the two - all business, all work, and absolutely no play.

In all honesty, the only reason Lucifer was the heir was because of their birth. They were twins, but Lucifer had been the first out of his mother’s womb. They were the only children of their father, twin boys. And he was the oldest - if only by 5 minutes, but still the oldest. 

Lucifer sighs, deciding to stop wishing the gods above for a second chance at birth. And to take his time and let Michael go out first. Honestly, if he could go back in time to the day of his birth he’d tell his unborn self. There’s no rush. Really. Being the first born sucks! Just take your time, enjoy the scenery of uh…Anyway- don't rush kid! Really. Dont. He swore Michael was practically pushing him to get out first anyway. He should have let him, if he was even conscious enough for that. Probably not he barely had a brain at birth. 

Lucifer groans loudly and shakes his head.

Okay no more stalling. He has to get cleaned up and meet his father in the dining hall. He knows there’s no way to get out of this position he’s literally born into. So he sucks it up and tries to make himself more presentable. Putting his white overcoat back on. 

…The halls of Lucifers ‘home’ are large. Towering above him. He’s always felt so small here. It doesn’t take him long to descend the spiraling stairs to the first floor of the mansion. And walk the Victorian styled halls. Their mansion and family came from old money. The mansion being around for far longer than Lucifer and his generation. So the interior design was never designed for the time period they were in. Not compared to friends of his who had their own mansions. Ones that were far more bright and colorful. Compared to his own that always held a dark and dready feeling to it.

Lucifer side eyes a particular painting hanging on the wall as he makes his way into the main hall that leads to their front door. He stops walking, examining it. 

Its a portrait of his father in black and white. There hallway is lined with portraits of each of the house masters. Or as he likes to put it…whoever is currently in charge of their fortune. And right now, that was his father. 

He stares down the portrait. 

His father is sitting in a large armchair, his face is a stern look. He’s frowning and staring straight ahead at the camera. His blonde hair is gelled back with wing tips at the earlobe. Lucifer is disturbed by how much he looks like his father, the only different is the that his father looks older. He has wrinkles under his eyes and frown lines around his mouth. But the portrait was painted when his father was only twenty. When he took over the house. 

Lucifer doesn’t deny the truth.  That the portrait is his future. That the man sitting in that chair will be him very soon. He’s eighteen and he knows whatever freedom he has, it's quickly drying up. He frowns, debating for a moment weather or not he could find some happiness in such a future. If he could truly be that kind of person. If he even had it in him. 

He shakes his head, freeing the thoughts of his mind. He briskly turns on his heel and walks down the hall to the dining room at a brisk pace. When Lucifer gets to the door he desperately pushes down the rising energy trying to push its way through his body. Urging his legs to turn and run. He doesn’t. He’s learn not to.

Pushing the door open welcomes that same loud and foreboding creak it always does with these old doors. Lucifer’s eyes immediately find the three bodies sitting at the table as he entered the large dining room. The fireplace is lit - even though its much to warm for it - and its warm glow is flickering off of the man at the head of the table. Dark shadows dances across his wrinkled and sunken face. His dark eyes hold no warmth and they find Lucifer immediately. Already looking at him with annoyance. A lecture on his tongue.

“You're late.” 

He was only a minute late. 

“I’m sorry father.” Lucifer apologies anyway. 

He and his brother are practically the spitting image of their father. Their faces just softer than their old mans. And were they have that bright blonde their fathers hair has already fully grayed. Something not uncommon for the head of their family. Its due to stress, Lucifer believes. For his father isn’t old enough to have full gray hair. But its something he doesn’t need nor have the time to ponder on. 

His father demands him to sit without saying it. Lucifer is already in his chair. When he’s had a moment to catch his breath he finally looks at the other two in the room. 

One is an older white man with dark short hair thats a comb-over. He has a small mustache and he’s a little on the heavier side. Beside him his a young woman appearing to be around his age. Or at least that’s his guess. She shares the same colored hair to her - presumably father? - her face is soft. Round. Her hair is long and delicately styled into a french braid. Her eyes are green but they aren’t particularly bright. She’s wearing a white dress, and sitting with perfect posture. 

His father doesn’t wait a second. “Lucifer this is Mr. Caleb. And his daughter, Eve,” He gestures to them. 

Eve holds her hand out expectantly. “It’s lovely to meet you.” 

Lucifer - trained like a dog - rises out of his seat long enough to take Eve’s hand and press a polite kiss to her knuckles. 

“The pleasure is all mine madam.” He returns, trying not to cringe as the insensirity between them. “And you as well sir.” He says, reaching out for a handshake from Mr. Caleb who returns it quickly. His hand is weak compared to the older mans. But it seems to suffice. He sits back down promptly. 

With pleasantries out of the way Lucifer’s father continues. “Lucifer, you are not engaged to Eve.” He says it so matter of factly that Lucifer barely registers it. His father doesn’t wait, simply going on. “You two will have a proper wedding in two months from now. You will begin making public appearances next week together.” He pauses, gestures to Eve and adds “she will grace you with her company from now until the wedding. That is understood I presume.”

Lucifer hopes the panic doesn’t show on his face. “Yes father.” 

That's the end of their discussion. Nothing more and nothing less. That’s the way of things in the morningstar manor. 

… 

…The next few weeks go by as you would expect. Lucifer is essentially ordered to spend time with Eve. He doesn’t mind it all that much. Eve isn’t annoying or rude. He’s just…not sure how to act around her. Their first meeting (alone) went about as well as he could hope.

They’re meeting in his family's garden now. A large lush area (and probably the once place he liked on the property). It was the one thing on their property that had color to it. In his opinion. It was a large space with a gate around it. The perimeter is filled with rose bushes. The interior is paved with trees, a fountain and smaller bushes. There’s a brick path leading around the garden and at the center is a gazebo. Where Eve waited. 

When Lucifer steps into the gazebo she looks at him. She’s wearing white again, so is he. It seems they are always matching. He’s not sure if that's on purpose or an accident. “Hello, Lucifer.” She says and he feels…weird, at how robotic she sounds. 

He walks over and takes her hand, giving her that same greeting he had when they first met. “Hello Eve. Lovely to see you again.” He looks up at her, hand loosely in his. She stares at him and he stares back, trying to examine her face. She looks flat. Her expression that is. Like a blank slate. 

He takes his hand away and takes a step back. Feeling weird about being so close to her. But when he looks at the greenier around them she continues to stare at him. Keeping her hands on her lap. Lucifer’s outfit is a little lighter today. He’s just wearing a white vest and short-sleeved button up. He needed his skin to breathe a little. But now he feels a little too exposed. 

To say things were awkward between them was an understatement. For Lucifer at least. “Sooo…what do you like to do?” Lucifer isn’t sure when he started tapping his foot. But he is. 

“Whatever my father permits me to do, I enjoy.” Was what Eve chose to say. 

Lucifer frowns, rubs his nape. Its sweaty. “Do you like to wear the white a lot?” 

“My father says it's elegant. So I do.” 

Lucifer begins to walk around the interior of the gazebo. Tapping his fingers on the railings. Eve never seems to move much, just observing him. He pauses, looks at her then gets an idea. “Hey!” She does the most expressive thing so far, raising her brow. 

“Yes?”

Lucifer walks a little closer. “Do you wanna go get some food or something? I know this great pizza place! It’s kinda down near the slums…Buuut their pizza is really great. And if he throw on some disguises nobody will-”

“I’m not interested in such activities.” She says pointedly. But politely. It doesn’t have the same bite as his fathers words do when he refuses something. But it does have that same implied message. We are rich. We don’t associate with the lower class. 

“Oh…okay.” Lucifer deflated a little. He pauses, “then what do you wanna talk about?” 

Eve ponders the question, then says “Only what’s necessary.” 

All of their interactions after that were the same. Lucifer doesn't enjoy the feeling he gets when around Eve. She wasn’t a bad person herself. But he noticed whenever they were together, compared to her, he felt like…well like a child. He offered to go out and do fun things. Pizza, parties, dancing - the fun kind, not the boring ballroom dancing with poise and proper etiquette. But every time he suggested anything of that sort she would always promptly - yet politely - turn him down. Saying it wasn’t something they should be doing. Because they were high class people and they shouldn’t do such things as having fun…Okay maybe she didn’t say exactly that but he knew she meant it.

So while he tried to enjoy the time spent with Eve, he didn’t. He tried to watch her, examine her. Figure out what she was thinking. But she was impossible to read. So one day he simply asked, “do you even wanna marry me?” 

Eve’s always calm face falters for once, and she frowns. Something in her eyes becomes a little more distant. Her reaction throws him off a little and makes him think, maybe she isn’t a robot. 

“It's what my father wants.” Is what she tells him.

When she said that, he had added “do you even like me? Or like being around me?” 

She looks at him then, and thinks about his question..for once. “You're pleasant company to be around,” is the simple answer she gives. He takes that as her not liking him in a romantic way, but at least considering him a friend. At least that's what he sees it as. 

He isn’t offended, he is relieved honestly. Because truth be told, he didn’t like her either. Not romantically at least. She was fine to be around. And while it was super boring he had been around worse people. She wasn’t bad, she was just quiet and doing what she was told. He was fine being friends but he couldn’t consider there to be any chemistry between them. She was too mature, too…all business and no fun. She’d already grown up. And he was still a child. 

He felt worse because he knew deep down it didn’t matter how he felt. They had less than a month by the time he realized he could never love her. And further realized that a marriage between them would be more like a play they were forced to put on for the rest of their lives. He dreaded it honestly. It felt like he walked into a much larger cage. It was just now, he had a cellmate. 

By the time their wedding was two weeks away Lucifer had given up all hope of finding happiness in his future. He had spoken to his friends about it. And while Bee and Ozzy suggested he just marry her and do secret dating on the side he knew he couldn’t. Even if Eve agreed to it. Not for the fact of cheating, because they weren’t together. It was an act, so he knew she wouldn’t care. It was more for the sake of whatever person he chose. If he fell in love he wanted to share a life with them. One that was out in the open, not hidden away behind closed doors.  That was no way to live. And it would only add more stress to him. 

His friends understood when he told them this. They were freer than him. Don't bond too these old money rules of marrying people your parents chose for you. He envied them, he really did. 

His friends felt bad for him, and so it was for this reason they decided to whisk Lucifer away one night. Tangled style. Except in reverse. They came to his window and he threw a rope down, tying it down with something and shimming down the wall and out of his ‘palace’. And off the three of them went, him Ozzy and Bee. They took him to a night club down in the lower class area. Those were the best according to Bee. They knew how to have fun. Lucifer had gone with some kind of disguise wearing a brown wig (that Bee got him) and instead of his usual white that he was so known for. He was wearing black. He meshed well with the dark lights of the club.

So it was here he found himself, two weeks before the wedding. At a nightclub one night. Sneaking out to meet up with his friends Bee and Ozzy weren’t uncommon. But it has been more difficult recently because of the upcoming marriage. He wondered if he would ever be able to do these kinds of things after the marriage.  The club was owned by his friend Bee. And this one was located in more of the lower class area. The nightclub was noisy, crowded with people that all melted into white noise of endless conversations and chatter. 

It's dark - obviously - and multicolored lights light up the club. There’s a dance floor all lit up with a rainbow pattern bouncing around, that's where Bee and Ozzy are right now. Or last he saw them at least. As for Lucifer himself, he’s standing at a high table, leaning his elbows on it. The public in general aren’t really his thing, he’s never good at being social. He always comes off more awkward than he wants too but Bee and Ozzy always make him more relaxed. But tonight he can’t calm down no matter what he does. 

“Woo!” Lucifer jumps at the loud - although familiar - voice behind him. He peers over his shoulder and looks up, and up and up and upppp. Until he finds Ozzie behind him. He’s stretching, “damn they are killin’ it on the dance floor tonight.” Ozmodious is a bulky built black man who is very tall. His hair is braided into short dreads that came down to his earlobes, the tips were dyed blue and what looked like the beginning of a beard was starting to grow around his mouth and jaw. Although as intimidating as Ozzie looked, he was actually very laid back and the chillest man Lucifer knew. 

“Hey Lucy,” he said, swinging an arm around him. Nearly squeezing him half the deaf, he manages to lift him an inch off the ground - not on purpose - In his hug.

“Hey Ozzy-” Lucifer all but wheezes. 

Ozzy loosens his grip on the lord's shoulders. “You sure you dont wanna join me and Bee on the dance floor?” He pauses, inspecting Lucifer’s face. How it scrunches up slightly. “Or maybe go somewhere else? After All this is supposed to be your night.” Your last night of freedom. The truth goes unspoken.

Lucifer for his part offers a smile, it was in no way convincing but he tries anyway. “No, I’m okay, but thank you.” He has to raise his voice a little over the blaring music and crowd. 

Ozzy frowns, “are you sure?” He says loudly. Also talking over the music, it's a bass heavy song. 

“Yeah.” Lucifer maintains his smile. He’s used to it from all the public appearances over the course of his life. “Go have fun. I’m just gonna hang here and keep on drinkin!” He holds up his martini glass. It’s a pink fruity looking drink with an umbrella in it. Some would argue it's emasculating to drink something so pink but he doesn’t care, he can’t stand the more bitter alcohols he’s expected to drink at gatherings. Besides, he likes pink. It meshes well with his usual white wardrobe.

Ozzy shrugs,” if you say so. But if you need us you know where we at.” With that Ozzy walks off leaving Lucifer to his drink.

He keeps his smile up until Ozzy melts back into the crowd and he lets it fall. 

He turns his eyes back to his martini glass. And studies the pink liquid inside. This is his…5th? 6th? Glass? He’s lost track honestly. And while he’s not as out of it as he wants to be his senses are certainly dulled. His movements feel more sluggish. The music doesn’t feel so close anymore. He prefers it this way. Even though in the back of his mind, he knows he’s an easy target. 

Lucifer lazily traces his index along the rim of his glass, his eyes fall lidded and he frowns. There’s a part of his mind that whispers, like a temptress. That he doesn’t have to go back, he could run away tonight. Run away somewhere far were nobody knows his name. Its…an appealing thought. But only to someone half drunk and well on their way to being wasted. And he knows that while it’s an appealing thought now, it would probably come back to bite a somber him in the ass. So he ignores such an intrusive thought. 

He sighs, and pours the entire glass down his throat. It tingles and burns only a little but it's sweet. He sets it down on the table with a heavy clink. Great…his distraction is now in his stomach and well on its way to his brain. Now what? 

As if on cue, something snatches his buzzing mind away from his empty glass. Lucifer looks up hearing the loud cheers that manage to cut through the booming music. Was someone being murdered? Would they consider shanking him too? No? Too bad. 

  Thankfully nobody is being killed, rather it's just a small crowd around a table. They’re honestly too close to him. Being just a few feet away at another table. With their shoving and bumping he fears they might shove him too. With all the commotion he can’t help but see what the fuss is about. He doesn’t have to look far. The woman dancing on top of the table isn’t exactly hard to miss, even amongst the sea of people in the club. She’s the only person doing that he notices.

Lucifer stares at her.

She’s a tall slender white woman, her body is thin and curved all to viewable for the public through her form fitting black dress. That has an open back - all the way down to her waist, and cuts off at the mid-thighs. She’s dancing to the bass of the music - her long, waist-length hair swaying with every movement. Her hips move as if they are the ones producing the music coming out of the club. Her hair is long, blonde and her lips are coated in a black lipstick. Her eyelids are colored in a dark purple coating. 

The beat bounces and she bounces with it the crowd below her cheers.

It's definitely erotic. But she also dances in such a way that feels so…freeing. So, carefree. 

Someone hands her a drink, and she swallows it effortlessly before tossing the glass back to the stranger who catches it barely. She rolls her spine along to the rhythm, throwing her head back. Her hair falls through the air like an ocean wave. 

Lucifer is transfixed on her. 

She looks over at him, and their eyes meet for the briefest of moments. Shame rises in him,having been caught staring at her and he immediately looks away. His face burns. Ah what was he doing staring at some random stranger? He’s probably creeping her out. 

Lucifer suddenly feels an arm entrap his shoulders and at first he assumes it's Ozzy. But when he looks up he yelps at the sudden face alarmingly close to him. He backs up, stumbles. It's the woman, and she’s chuckling at his reaction. 

Lucifer catches his breath, she came over to him? Why?

Now that she’s closer though, he can tell she’s taller than him. Not by much but definitely taller. He doesn’t mind it. The base of the music burst to life once again threatening to pierce his eardrums. But it's as if he can feel the hammering beat of the base in his chest, as the woman walks close to him. He’s unsure of what she wants, what she wants to do. He doesn’t even know her name. 

He just can’t help but watch her. 

She moves so freely even just walking towards him. Never letting the music not move her body. She reaches out and grabs his arm and tugs him close. Lucifer for some reason, lets her. His pulse is climbing. It's racing. 

She drags him along and he doesn’t quite know what's going on, just that she shoves him into a nearby chair. And she’s letting the music take over her again. She’s dancing above him, her hands pressed against his shoulders, keeping him pressed into the back of the chair. Once she’s; sure he’s not going to move - how can he, really? - she takes her hands back and cocks her hips in a hypnotizing motion to the thundering beat of the music. Lucifer's eyes are dragged to her hour-glass like figure. Her hands continue moving across her large thighs, up into a dainty curved waist. She tries her hands over her thighs, up over his hips. Lucifer’s eyes follow. Her hands travel inward over her breast over the neckline and they shoot up over her head. 

Lucifer breath hitches in his throat.

            She’s…

“You're beautiful.” 

The woman looks at him, amused and a bit perturbed. She laughs. It’s a glorious sound, it's light and jovial. She leans into his space, placing her hands on either side of his chair. “What was that handsome?” She speaks. God she speaks and her voice is like that of an angel. It's low and silky smooth; it's like a goddess tempting him to do sinful things.

Christ he must be drunker than he thought if just one sentence from a stranger is enough to have his tongue tied.

“I-I said you're beautiful.” He stutters out, making his voice louder. She smiles - it looks like an honest smile. 

“Thank you. You're hot.” She bluntly states. Lucifer turns into a tomato and she laughs again. “And cute. For being Lucifer Morningstar.”

His brows raise, “you know who I am?” The brief instance of his name rather than being referred to as ‘my lord’ throws him off a little. But he doesn’t mind in the slightest. 

“Of course.” She says. “And the rumors were right, you're a lot nicer in person.” 

Lucifer flashes red for a whole other reason now. “What's your name?” He calls over the rising music. 

She looks surprised at the question. “Lilith.” But she leans closer to him, their chests almost pressed together. If he had been more sober the public display of…whatever this was probably would have put him off. But right now? His mind was too focused on the goddess who was now on his lap. 

“You're really pretty Lilith.” He giggled, fuck he is drunk. 

She smirked, eyes lidded.

Without so much as a warning or hint Lilith leans forward and captures Lucifer’s lips in hers. His eyes grow wide. And there’s a part of his mind that tells him it's not a good idea. But he immediately shuts that part down. He’s going to be throwing away his life soon. So he doesn’t care right now. Eve wouldn’t care. They aren’t married yet and it's not like she even likes nor cares about him.

Still his heart races because…

Well as pathetic as it is this is the first time he’d been kissed.

But his brain doesn’t focus on that, because Lilith is a good kisser. She takes control of his lips, abusing them with a practiced pace. She truly is a siren, for she gets his lips apart and slips her tongue in like a serpent. Their tongues wrestle for a moment, and it's a losing fight against the expert that Lilith is. Her tongue tastes like alcohol and it mixes with the sweeter alcohol he had been drinking. It tastes like heaven. 

His fingers twitch and something burns in him. Aching for more.

Lilith pulls back too soon in his opinion. But she doesn’t go far, keeping their faces close. She looks at him then, their faces inches apart. Her eyes look almost gold under the club lights but he thinks they are actually green? He’s not sure. He looks at her, her face is curved, her eyes narrowed and beautiful. Her hair long and waving freely, her dress leaving little to the imagination. But it restates the fact that she is pretty. “Wanna go somewhere private?” 

Lucifer eyes shoot wide open. “Uh-” his face burns and he glances around for his friends. He knows full well what she’s asking. He’s not an idiot after all. But… “I-I dunno. Uh…” He rubs his neck. He peers back at her. She’s waiting, and she’s tilting her head ever so slightly. 

“Don’t be scared.” She cooes, trailing a finger along his chest.

Lucifer frowns and raises a brow, “are you a hooker or something?” He doesn’t mean to sound rude. It's an honest question and one his mind has worked up to after seeing the way she dances around the club. Was this her ploy to get a session out of him? Seeing him as a dollar sign?

Lilith looks offended though, just a bit. “What?” She scoffs, “no. I have more class than those bitches.” She says waving her hand about. She leans back then, hands on her hips. “I just like to have fun!” She says with a wide proud grin.

Lucifer raises his brows, “I-I’m sorry I didn’t mean to offend. I-I just thought…” he trails off.

Lilith eyes him, standing straight up, above him. Towering over him. The club lights bathe her in a blend of different colors. The white light behind illuminates her figure. “You're hot. I’m not trying to get money out of you. I just think you're hot. I wanna fuck you.” 

She says it so…so bluntly. Lucifer is so taken aback at her boldness. God nobody has ever spoken to him like that. Besides Bee and Ozzy but…not even to this extent. He should be offended..but…

“So you wanna take this somewhere else?” She says, slipping into that sultrier voice once more. She leans down to his level, so she doesn’t have to be so loud. “Wanna see what's under these clothes?” She says, dragging a hand down her dress. 

Lucifer eyes her figure…it's nice but he looks up at her. At her face. At that mischievous sparkle in her eyes. 

How could he be insulted by such a bold, confident and beautiful woman? 

“Sure..” He replied; his voice is dazed and husky. 

They go to a nearby motel and Lucifer isn’t sure if he should be alarmed or surprised that Lilith already has a room in the run down place. With his mind both buzzing from the alcohol and an erection below his belt that was begging for attention, his mind decides he doesn’t care.

…Lucifer is pushed onto the bed. 

Lilith isn’t in any way shy or timid. She’s definitely done this sort of thing before. - Which makes Lucifer feel a bit bothered, but that's a thought for sober him. - She unbuttons his shirt with practiced effort. Their pace isn’t by any means slow. It’s fast and impatient. Which for a drunken aroused Lucifer? Is perfectly fine with him. In minutes she’s unfastening his belt and pulling his pants down before Lucifer can properly enjoy any of it. There is a sliver of his mind that feels embarrassed and nervous. But it's quickly washed away when Lilith strips her dress and undergarments off without any shame. Lucifer is still marveled by her confidence. And in that moment he stares at her like she truly is a goddess kneeling above him. 

“Wow…” He mutters dreamily. 

Lilith smiles and chuckles. It seems to be a genuine laugh. “Shh.” She says, pressing a finger to his lips. “Relax.” He does. “Goodboy.”

Lucifer flushes.

There are no more words spoken between them after that.

  …Lucifer honestly taps out after fifteen minutes, - which Lilith doesn’t seem to mind for she has her ways to get him started again - but the next hour goes by with him in a haze. He doesn’t remember when he falls asleep. But he does with him and Lilith on the hotel bed naked.

When he wakes…he doesn’t remember how he got where he is. Because he’s sitting on a park bench and immediately looks down, to find himself - thankfully - dressed. But he’s dressed more casually, dressed in a way he would prefer. Just a simple button down and slacks. He looks up, seeing a little girl swinging on monkey bars. Her face is blurred for him but he can tell at the very least she’s a child. With long blonde hair. He watches her for a moment and sees her hand begin to slip, he stands ready to go and catch this girl, but someone beats him to it. 

A man who he hadn’t even noticed was there shoots up from his seat and runs to catch the girl just in time. His hair is a bright and noticeable red. But he can’t make out his facial features either. Maybe that's her dad, he assumes at least. The man holds the girl in one of his arms and they share a laugh. They pause and turn to look directly at Lucifer, he still can’t make out their faces. But he can’t deny a blooming warmth flooding his chest. He’s never felt it before but one word cuts through his mind, clear as day.

Happy. 

He suddenly wakes up, his eyes flashing open into the darkness of the room. His heart is hammering and he takes a minute to breathe in. He feels his heart slow, into steady beats. He registers Liliths soft breaths and sighs. 

That was a weird dream. He thinks. 

His attention goes back to the sleeping woman. Lilith.. How beautiful she is. Even sleeping. 

Lucifer waits for her to wake. Maybe he's smitten, or maybe it's because she took his virginity. But he feels waiting is the right thing to do. When Lilith does wake it's almost morning. And Lucifer knows he could get in trouble. But to see her surprised expression when she finds him waiting beside her with some coffee from the motel lobby. It's worth it. 

Lucifer asks to see her again. To keep seeing her. Until he's to be married again. Much to his surprise, she says yes. It's enough to make Lucifer feel light as air. With that agreement he stumbles out of the room, smelling of booze and sex. Looking like it too. But he has no time left and has to get home. 

Lucks on his side because he makes it home before his disappearance is noticed. It's.. Sad, actually. But he's to happy and hungover to care. He calls his friends when he's able to let them know he's safe. They naturally both want details which he would provide. 

Time goes on, Lucifer and Lilith do meet up again. But sparingly. What with still being ordered to spend time with Eve. But what little time he does get to spend with Lilith - undercover - is usually under the cover of night and a blessing. 

Much to Lucifers dismay his snap fantasy life comes to an end. With the day of his wedding creeping up on him like death itself, he has to bid Lilith goodbye. Unsure and unwilling to keep pursuing whatever it is they have under in secret. 

So the day of his wedding comes. With the girl he wished was Lilith. Maybe he's crazy for having that thought. He probably is. But it's a pointless thought nonetheless. He knows his place, and he’s aware that the short time he had with Lilith was nothing more than a break from his reality. So here he stands, before Eve in her white wedding gown. Her face no less changing than the day they’d met. Stoic and calm as usual. So unlike Lilith’s bright and expressive face. He can’t help but compare the two not, even though he shouldn’t. 

The wedding is what would be expected of the morningstars. Its lavish and fancy. Set in a large park well taken care of. A park the rich frequent most often, but today is reserved for this occasion. The guests are not only consisting of Lucifer and Eve’s respective family members. But the other hundred people in the crowd are friends of the morningstars. Friends of his father. Bee and Ozzy are among them. But they aren’t as excited for this wedding like Lucifer’s father is. Excitement is actually…not the right word to describe his father in this circumstance. Eager is a better way to put it. He’s at the front row, sitting beside his mother. His arms are crossed. He has that same impatient look he always has on his face. Like the world is moving too slow for him.

Impatient.

That’s the right word to describe his father.

Lucifer looks back at Eve. He offers her a small smile, unsure why. Maybe to steady his own nerves. She returns the smile but it doesn’t reach her eyes. 

“We are gathered here today…” The priest begins. His words sound like he’s speaking underwater, to Lucifer at least. As he goes on Lucifer can’t help but glance at the crowd again, he’s aware that he should be looking forward. But can’t help it with his nerves growing. He sees his twin in the front row too, beside his - eager - mother and he looks jealous. Of Eve? He doubts it. Of him finally proclaiming his position as the new head of the home? Likely. 

He catches Bee and Ozzy in the crowd, and they find his gaze. And both nod to him. It's a condolence. He knows. A sharp clearing of the throat from his father snaps Lucifer back to attention. A warning. 

“Samiel Morningstar. Do you take Eve to be your lawfully wedded wife? To have and to hold from this day forward?” For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and cherish until death do you part?"

.

Lucifer hesitates, he glances at his father. Who gives him an icy look. He lowers his brows and gives one curt nod. Lucifer swallows, he looks at Eve who as usual is stoic. “I…I do.” He says, stuttering a little. When he glances at his father again he looks annoyed, but satisfied. 

The priest turns to Eve. Repeating himself. 

Lucifer in that moment, takes those final seconds to lament on his life. This…wedding, this ceremony. It doesn’t feel like a celebration of love at all. As it should be. It feels like he is being sentenced to prison and he’s signing away his freedom that he had with those words. 

This is wrong, he thinks solemnly. A wedding should not be held to force two people together. Two people who hardly know each other muchless love each other. Because Lucifer is certain Eve does not love him nor has come to love him in the brief month they had been introduced and then pushed into this wedding. 

He looks at her.

He was naive. He was naive to what a real relationship required. Lilith opened his eyes to that at the very least. While what he and Lilith had was in no way a relationship, it felt far more real than whatever he and Eve were supposed to have. What he did with her, being intimate with her. He…he couldn’t, he couldn’t do that. Not with Eve. Not with someone who didn’t even look at him like he was wanted. Looked at him with that same empty stare his father had. Someone he felt no attraction towards. Lilith was a star that shines and shimmers so brilliantly. Eve was an empty husk of a person she could have been. He knew what was expected of him. But he’s failed to realize how heavy that burden would be until now.

Lucifer looks Eve in the eyes.

How can I ever have children with this woman? How can I ever try to love her? Someone Who looks at me with not an ounce of love or even a person in those eyes? 

A chill runs down his spine.

“I do.” He hears Eve say, and her words for the first time carry an ounce of trepidation. 

Something in him snaps. And he feels like that sliver of fear in her is what pushes him over the edge. 

“Then with the power invested in me, I now pronounce you man and wife. You may now kiss the bride.” 

Lucifer's hands curl.

Don’t do it.

You’ll regret it.

He looks at Eve, her eyes hidden behind her veil. She’s defeated. She’s surrendered. 

“I can’t.” His thoughts come out of his mouth far too late for him to take it back. And his eyes blow wide as a gasp rushes over the crowd like a wave. 

Dread pools in Lucifer, it's cold and frozen over. It's icy. 

He hears his father stand from his chair. “You will.” He states. That’s all he says.

Lucifer can feel his throat tightening. He can’t…HE CAN’T GODDAMMIT!

“No!” He shouts looking at his father who looks downright appalled. He’s shocked, registering what his son said to him. 

The crowd is deadly silent. Lucifer feels his heart in his ears. “No?” He repeats like he’s never been told that word. “No?!” He repeats once more like he’s never heard it. “You do what I tell you Samiel!” 

Something boils in Lucifer, in this second he thinks of Lilith. How free she is, how confident she is. He wants to be that confident. He wants to be free. Free with her. “I refuse! I don’t love her! And she doesn't love me! I won’t marry her.” 

His father growls “I gave you an order.” 

Lucifer stares his father down, every ounce of his body is screaming to stop. To get on his knees and beg for forgiveness. But no, not this time. “I refuse.” 

His father takes a step forward, pointing an accusatory finger at Lucifer. He could see the red rising in his cheeks. “You listen to me right now Samiel or you are OUT of this family!” 

Lucifer swallows. He looks at his mother, who is staring at him with a pleading look. At his brother, who seems satisfied. Happy. At his father, the seething man looking his usually well composure at a wedding. Then at Eve.

She’s frowning, she looks…sad. She is looking at the floor. He feels for her, but he can’t free her. Only she can, But he won’t be her captor, and he can’t remain a prisoner himself any longer. He wonders, if his mother wanted him. His brother. If that was a willing choice, or one his father pressed on her. He can’t imagine she did, when he looks at them. 

Lucifer sighs, and says calmly “then I guess I’m done here.” 

Its all he says. As he walks down the aisle, alone. 

Eve is at the alter, a look of pure shock on her face. The strongest display of emotions she’s ever displayed. Lucifer wishes her best, hopes she can break free from her own shackles one day. 

His father is screaming at this point. The angriest he’s ever been with him. He’s swearing, cursing, telling him all the things he is. How broken he is how wrong he is what a failure he is. 

But Lucifer keeps walking. 

He doesn’t even get to say goodbye to his mother, or his brother. But he wishes them best, knowing that with him gone his brother will get his place. Its for the best. He never wanted it in the first place. 

He refuses to live his life as someone he’s not. He refuses to end up like Eve, to become a shell of himself. He can’t do it. He might have, if not for her. 

As he walks the city streets, he slips the ring out of his pocket. The ring meant for Eve, the ring he managed to take before leaving. He’s young, he’s only eighteen. But he’s free, free to make his choices and maybe this is a stupid choice most would argue. But for him, its the only one that feels right.

He walks into the motel, and climbs the stairs to the room he’s memorized. The one she’s been living in. He knocks, and waits. When she opens the door, she is surprised to find him there. “Hi.” She greets, “weren’t you supposed to be getting married?” She asks confused.

Lucifer is still in his white tux. 

He looks at Lilith like she’s something to be worshipped, the smile that breaks onto his face isn’t forced. Isn’t fake. Its never with her. “Wanna do something crazy?” He asks her instead, with a grin threaneing to slip his lips.

She raises her brow. 

Lucifer pulls the ring from his pocket, and he kneels before her. Lilith eyes blow wide. Lucifer simply says with hope in his eyes. “Wanna get married?” 

He’s crazy. He’s known her less than a month, He is absolutely nuts. He knows that. But he also just swore off a lifetime of fortune and his family. But they had never given off the same warmth Lilith had. A stranger. 

Lilith laughs. “Sure, why not.” 

Lucifer grins, she grins. 

They are both insane, surely they both must be insane. Right? 

It doesn’t matter…not to Lucifer. 

All that matters to him is that he’s finally gotten to make his own choice for once. And he chooses Lilith. Maybe there’s a chance at being happy for him afterall. 

[stephaniebrownslover]

★彡[! ɢᴇɴᴇʀᴀʟ ᴄʟᴏᴄᴋᴡᴏʀᴋ ʜᴇᴀᴅᴄᴀɴᴏɴꜱ!]彡★

Note: This headcanons are the realistic ones, not funny ones or fanon versions.

: ̗̀➛Clockwork's favorite coffee is unfiltered bitter ones because she prefers bitter or salty flavors to sweet.

: ̗̀➛She wears an eye patch whenever she has to go out for something and mingle in public because she doesn't want to draw too much attention. Still, she doesn't go out in public much, she just joins the 'lovely' society to go to the bar or something since she hates the society.

: ̗̀➛When she needs something, she waits for the evening and steals it, if it is urgent, she chooses a secluded place and quickly kills the owner of that place.

: ̗̀➛Actually she can play the violin very well even though she doesn't tell anyone, she watched videos on how to play the violin on YouTube and trained herself on this subject when she was a little kid. She always thought violins are pretty cool and relaxing and she still do.

: ̗̀➛When she first put the watch in her eye, she got inflammation, and it was very bad, her eye burned for days as if someone had put a flaming stick into it. And the inflammation did not dry for days. She still feels a little pain while remembering that days.

: ̗̀➛Since she has basic first aid knowledge, she prefers to take care of herself when she is injured. She literally hates to people seeing her vulnerable and wounded.

: ̗̀➛Clockwork is actually very smart, although she doesn't show it. But she doesn't prefer to use her intelligence, so many people take her for a fool.

: ̗̀➛Since the "Creepypasta mansion" is not real, Clockwork uses her victims house for a while. First she kills some random people and then sneaks out and finds another house to avoid being caught.

: ̗̀➛After her breakup with Toby she decided not to date anyone regardless of gender because this isn't the first time she's been let down by a man.

: ̗̀➛Although she is one of the creepypastas who get caught by the police the most because she takes a long time to make his victims suffer, she manages to escape from the crime scene or prison, leaving behind bloody cops.

: ̗̀➛A true coffee lover, she drinks coffee almost every chance he gets.

: ̗̀➛Since her beloved toy giraffe Jaffy was burned in the fire, she stole a new toy giraffe for herself, but was angry that this did not replace Jaffy. So she broke the toy into pieces.

: ̗̀➛She doesn't have much to do with the other creepycakes except Jeff, Zero and Zalgo. She doesn't want or need to this because, she's already pretty happy with it.

: ̗̀➛Clockwork speaks a little Spanish because she had some of it in her mind, when she was little, she watched Spanish TV series with her mother.

: ̗̀➛She literally hates eating vegetables.

: ̗̀➛She hardly ever cleans her knives, and when she does, she doesn't pay much attention to it.

: ̗̀➛Before she kills his victims, she cuts their tongue out to keep them from screaming.

: ̗̀➛Clockwork learned how to drive using cars that she stole from other people because her beloved father not allowing her to get a driver's license before she left home. And while she learns how to drive, she suffered so many numerous injuries and serious accidents.

: ̗̀➛She doesn't know exactly why she hates people, but she especially hates judgmental people.

: ̗̀➛As a kid, she wanted a treehouse more than anything because her school had one in the yard, but the other kids wouldn't let Natalie in because they thought she was a freak. Every time Natalie tried to climb a tree, she was pushed down before she could get high enough. The only time she could use the treehouse at school was on cold nights when her dear father kicked her out of the house.

: ̗̀➛She never washes his knives, so the previous times she accidentally cut herself, she had to steal the necessary vaccine from the hospital to avoid tetanus. And obviously it wasn't easy.

: ̗̀➛Clockwork does justice to the word brutal, for example, she once gouged out the eyes of a victim's baby and fed it to her, and then killed them both. (You don't have to like the character, but your loved ones are doing worse things and don't hate Clockwork just because it's a girl)

: ̗̀➛She doesn't know how those bottles with ships in them are made, and they had a discussion with Toby about this example a few times.

: ̗̀➛She has a very limited wardrobe and all, also a few of her existing clothes are covered in bloodstains. She can steal new clothes, but it's not easy to find something that fits her style and she doesn't care enough about her looks.

: ̗̀➛When she was little, her favorite kind of candy was lollipops, and she always bought drawing items or a lollipop whenever her mom gives her money for lunch. She loves the pleasant taste in his mouth which stays for a long time. Her favorite flavor was cola.

: ̗̀➛She has a lot of trouble when she sleeps at night because of the clock eye, and this is one of the reasons why she doesn't sleep until she faints. The clatter of the clock echoing in the silence drives Clockwork crazy enough to make her want to tear herself apart.

: ̗̀➛Her knives have a name and Toby is comparing them to each other just to piss her off so he ships them. He even tried to write a story about the two of her knives being lovers. Even though he didn't know there was such a thing as a fanfic, this was exactly what he did.

: ̗̀➛She loves scented candles, although she doesn't tell anyone, but hates the burning woody scent of incense. The reason she likes scented candles is because they create a pleasant atmosphere while drawing and she likes only a few types anyway. If I said scented candle, don't think of such cute things. Before lighting the candles, she acts careful not to damage the wick. And sometimes she carves the wax and gives it strange shapes.

: ̗̀➛Halloween is her least favorite day because everyone thinks her appearance is a costume and she hates it with a burning passion. She rages especially when people try to compliment her on her costume for being so realistic. Because what people think is a simple costume is the heavily battered body that she's been doomed to for the rest of her life.

: ̗̀➛She has a special point towards animals, she thinks they are innocent because they are not aware of anything. She especially loves cats and snakes. In fact, if she had the opportunity, she would have been one of those people who kept snakes in their house.

: ̗̀➛Contrary to popular belief, she and Jane have a hostile relationship because of her friend Jeff. Well come on, who likes someone who's sworn to kill their best friend?

: ̗̀➛The subjects she didn't hate at school were painting and literature. Although she says that literature is only for lame nerds, she continues to read from time to time in secret from everyone. She's even read a few Jane Austen books for a school project before, and although romance and classics was not her preferred genre, she didn't find Austen's style bad. She is a type who likes to read more gothic literature, mystery/thriller concepts and underground literature. Still, if anyone asks, she doesn't even touch anything other than comic books.

"Pfft, like we care. Of course we're gonna kick their thick asses!"

"And you think my life was easy? Do you have any damn idea how hard to feeling so helpless and weak!?"

"What, no fucking way! Two-headed dicks are not real!"

"Okey I'm waiting but please don't blame me if you feel a little bit stabbed."

"Do I look like fucking Freud? He was a total weirdo!"

"I hate to say this but if you're gonna die, I'll kill you for it."

"Whaaaatttt, of course I'm not drunkkkk. Can a drunk person do thissss?"

Hope y'all liked it! Have a lovely day<3

[raspberryconverse]

(pardon my bad cropping: it's been at least 8 years since I took a class on video editing and I can't figure out how to do it the way I want it)

When I saw this scene, it really got me thinking. At first I thought, "I never had any crushes on girls when I was younger. Discovering I was bisexual came out of nowhere." Or so I thought, until a few days ago.

I realized I was bisexual when I took a photography class my senior year of high school. My best friend was gay (so gay my mom could tell from across the street when we were 13), so it's not like I didn't know any queer people, but it just never really occurred to me that I could be queer too. Enter Purple-Haired Sarah. She had just moved to our town (I lived in one of those places the majority of people spend their entire childhood there), so I had just met her that year. She wasn't just pretty, but she (obviously) had purple hair and a fun style. If we had to work in pairs or groups, I wanted to be with her. Then one night I had a sexy dream about her. And that's when it clicked for me. Definitely a, "Well, guess I'm bi now." (There was a bit of experimentation with a friend of a friend to confirm, not that you necessarily need to do that)

But I really, truly thought I never had any crushes on other girls when I was younger. I saw this scene and thought, "Yeah, that was never me." I never had that urge to impress or desire to always be around certain friends- oh wait. Maybe I did.

My very first best friend was named Steph, or Steffy when we were younger. We met in second grade. I was always at her house or she was at mine (more often at hers because she had a computer and AOL so we could go in the chat rooms and do other online stuff in the early 90s). She used to live around the corner from me, but she moved a little bit away. Luckily, the school district let her and her brother still go to the same elementary school, but she did end up going to a different junior high/middle school (my district switched when we were in 8th grade, so we only spent 2 years at those schools). We also joined orchestra in 4th grade (violin for me, cello for her), though she didn't continue into JH/MS and I did. What was really interesting was that she facilitated in a crush I had on a boy who played viola (who eventually became a good friend in high school and we did make out a few times). I'd write him notes and she'd drop them in his viola case on her way to the cello section when we had rehearsals for the district wide Orchestra Festival. When we were younger, we both had a major love for the Baby-Sitters Club books. I remember one year I wanted us to dress as two of the characters for Halloween. She was supposed to be Kristy and I was Mary Anne (before her dad loosened up and let her wear things other than skirts and dresses). She didn't follow through with it though, and I was really upset about it.

I was really sad when Steph wasn't able to go to the same school as me for JH/MS. And when she went there, she really changed. TBH, I kinda did too, but I always was really disappointed that she changed so much. We were both big Hanson fans when they first were popular, but I never got into any of the other boy bands or pop artists of the late 90s/early 00s. She became really preppy and I was more punk/alternative (I went through a big Nirvana phase in 8th grade). It broke my heart that she wasn't my best friend anymore and we didn't have as much in common as we used to. We did go to the same high school and we were still friends, but it definitely wasn't the same. But I think the fact that I always wanted to hang out with her, was so disappointed when we weren't at the same school and that she changed so much might have been signs of an early crush (even if I was having crushes on boys at the same time).

The next one without a doubt (though I just thought of this yesterday) was my best friend Rachael. Rachael and I met in third grade and she was a part of my friend group with Steph. Later in elementary school, we were inseparable. She was definitely my best friend out of the friend group. In seventh grade, I spent a lot of time at her house. She even took me on a vacation with her family one summer. Unfortunately, in eighth grade she moved out to the county (IDK why my particular area uses the term "county" instead of "country," but that's just the local vernacular for the area west of the interstate). We stayed close friends, though. I still spent a lot of time at her house because my mom really liked her (not that she didn't like Steph) and as we got older, we got into similar music and clothing styles, unlike Steph. All through high school we spent a ton of time together, despite her being a 25 minute drive away (if that doesn't say something about how much I loved being with her, IDK what does). She was my partner in crime when I had a boyfriend my mom didn't like and she kind of a had thing with his friend too. We talked my grandma into taking us to see them, even though my mom forbade it. When I got a car, I would drive out to hang out with her all the time (and drive her and her boyfriend around and they'd make out in the backseat of my mid 80s Buick and I'd "accidentally" have to slam on the brakes so they'd go flying off the seat). We remained super close all through high school, despite not even being in the same school district. We went to local punk band concerts together, thrift shopped for fun random t-shirts from the kids section (that was kind of our style) and crushed on similar boys.

The only thing that was a bit of a problem with Rachael was when I came out as bisexual, it made her uncomfortable. Maybe she realized my feelings for her were more than platonic even though I didn't. I mean, there was always a lot of ass smacking and other silly things that could totally be seen as flirting, even though I didn't perceive it that way. But looking back, I totally see it now.

The last crush I didn't realize was a crush was the first one that got me thinking about this: Rhianon. I met Rhianon in seventh grade and she was just so cool, especially with such a cool name and I was boring Nicole V. Her parent let her dye fun color streaks in her dark hair and she wore such cool clothes. She was fairly popular, but not in a preppy way like it was in the late 90s. She didn't like boy bands or the other pop singers like Steph. She liked bands like No Doubt (she was very inspired by Gwen Stefani's fashion) and other alternative bands of the time. Honestly, she was kind of an inspiration. I wanted to be more like her. I wanted to be her. Maybe I just wanted her.

We were friends in high school because we still hung with the same crowd. I was definitely jealous of her: her confidence, her style, the boys she was able to date. I distinctly remember a local band show where she was dating one of the trombonist of one of the ska bands who I really like and I legit spent most of the show crying in the bathroom because seeing them all over each other made me so jealous. But was I jealous of her or was I jealous of him?

I certainly wouldn't have thought so at the time, but looking back, it probably was.

I definitely remember her posting on LiveJournal after she went to college that she had joined a sorority. I actually commented on the post and said I was very disappointed that she had because that just wasn't the Rhianon I knew. One of her new friends replied and didn't understand why I felt so strongly about it. But sororities just weren't very Rhianon, if you asked me. She still remained pretty cool all this time, though. She got married a few years before I did and she wore this really cute almost sort of rockabilly shorter wedding dress with a birdcage veil. I would have loved to be able to pull off something like that (not that I didn't love my wedding dress, because I wouldn't change a thing about the way my wedding turned out, minus the way the arch got set up), but I've just never had the confidence she's always had.

Oh, and the interesting thing about my Rhianon crush I didn't realize was still definitely a crush: she often comments or reacts to my Facebook posts and I was super disappointed that she didn't go to our high school reunion. I would have loved to have seen her. And now I know why.

That a-ha moment is really interesting to think about. Needless to say, Nick's bisexual discovery has made a lot of us older bis realize we had some of those feelings earlier than we originally thought. Even me, who swore up and down it was just Purple-Haired Sarah during senior year that did it for me. The more I think about it, the more I realize she probably wasn't the first.

[3wisellamas]

SCC Week 2023 -- Family / Friendship (What are they like with others?)

(Note, this makes pretty heavy use of my own background / family headcanons for these guys, including the OCs from Behind the Music!  For reference, Suite = Sweet and Cecil = Cap’n (And Cakes = K_K, obviously.))

---

"No, Suite is the first-timer.  Fortissimo was here last year!"   As the Swatchling flipped through her clipboard anxiously searching once again for the name, Viola leaned forward, speaking in a hushed voice.   "He...might have been listed under the name..."

"Oh, yes!  Here sh...he is, ma'am!"  Handing Fortissimo his nametag, the teenaged speaker could finally rejoin his siblings on the bench along with his mother, who looked over the quartet of performers, ensuring everything was in place. Particularly eyeing Cadence and Suite carefully, she motioned towards the viola the child in the purple-checked skirt held.  "You, play me Follin's Symphony in A, first movement."  Picking up their instrument, the child played to their mother's satisfaction, each note perfect.  "So you are Cadence.  Good, the last thing I needed today was you and Suite switching clothes again and embarrassing me as well!"  Shooting another cold glance at Fortissimo, who shrank in his seat next to his twin sister Fermata, Viola sighed in both relief and anguish.  "Now, I expect the four of you to play the pieces you've rehearsed to perfection.  If I don't see four blue ribbons when I return to retrieve you..."   Viola didn't even need to finish her statement, as her children knew exactly what awaited them if they didn't win, as usual.  Well, three of the four did, anyway -- Suite was simply excited to be there, finally able to join his older siblings in the annual Cyber City Youth Solo Competition, in the ages-10-to-15 group.   Though his mother insisted the stakes were high, just being away from home, at a public school gymnasium temporarily converted for the purpose rather than a high-profile stage and filled with other Darkners his own age, was a rare treat, and the little speaker bounced energetically in his seat, taking the new experience in. Of course, as Viola left, Suite nudged Cadence's arm, giggling.  "I still can't wait for you to teach me to play your viola.  Then we'll really mess with Mother!" "Oh, don't worry, we'll get her..."  They mischievously laughed to themselves, and got some smirks from Fermata and Fortissimo as well, the twins proud to pass along their penchant for schemes to the younger duo. But, as the speakers eagerly waited for their turns to perform for the judges, Suite again fidgeted anxiously, watching the groups of other children as they sat around the waiting area, chatting and practicing amongst themselves.  It was the only chance he'd get, until the next year's competition.  "Hey, guys, um, I'll be right back!" "Suite, wait!"  Cadence tried to catch her brother but it was too late, he'd already jumped up and dashed to the nearest group.   At first as he approached none of the other kids seemed to notice, too distracted by one of their number, a radio-based Darkner, plucking an unfamiliar tune on his own violin, and Suite spoke up as the short melody subsided.   "Hey, that was pretty good!  But, I think you missed a B-flat there, you played a B instead!"  Instantly, all the other kids turned to give Suite a sudden sneer, making him take a step back but not dulling his enthusiasm in the least.  "Um, anyway, my name's Suite!  Can I hang out with you until they call my name?" "We know who you are," a different child, this one an Addison, hissed at him, pointing to the nametag attached to Suite's purple sweater.  "You're the new Concerto kid.  And no, you can't hang out with us!" "Yeah, go back to your own kind," a Pluggirl shouted, prompting her friends to laugh. "My own...kind?"  Suite stared at them, confused.  And...yeah, My name's Suite Concerto.  Do you know my brothers and sisters?" "Know 'em?!"  The Pluggirl stood on her toes, trying to tower over Suite even though, as small as he was, she still couldn't quite match him.  "You guys are the worst!  You and the others get first place in every category every single year!  We never get a break!" "Yeah, a lot of us even learned violin this year so we might have a chance!  And then here comes Suite Concerto," the radio with the violin added, pointing to the violin case in Suite's hands.   "I..."  Suite wasn't sure how to even respond to the accusations.  This was only his first year competing, after all, and the first real time he'd ever had any other Darkner kids to talk to!  "I just...wanted to be friends..." "Well, we don't!  Not with you!"  They shooed Suite away, laughing, and he trudged back to the bench where his siblings sat, on their own, far away from all the other kids who'd undoubtedly done the same to them in previous years, as Suite saw in their expressions.   Cadence patted the spot next to her for Suite to climb onto again, and no sonner had he done so than she pulled her little brother into a tight hug, with the twins soon joining her.   "We're not...that bad, are we?" Suite asked, stifling a sob, and the others all shook their heads. "Other kids are just mean sometimes," Fermata explained, "but your family will always have your back.  And maybe, someday, you'll find someone else who cares about you just as much as we do.  Right guys?"  Fortissimo and Cadence agreed, with the latter holding Suite's hand for much of the rest of the afternoon, until they returned home and delivered their four first-place ribbons to Viola. Someone else who cared about him, just as much as his family...and aside from his parents, Suite's family were his favorite people in the entire Dark World.  They were his only people in the entire Dark World.  He couldn't wait for the day he had more. --- It was just hard to watch, but Cecil's parents held firm, staying on the sidelines so as not to embarrass their son.  It wasn't like he needed any more of it. Of all the opening lines, he had to pick "So, you come here often?" "I work here," the Addison cashier at the ticket counter flatly responded, and Cecil's face flushed bright blue instantly.  But he didn't give up so easily, paying for the movie tickets using the Dark Dollars his mom had given him and giving her a strained smile. "Y-You know, I can't wait to see this one.  I've read all the books!"  Technically.  He was still halfway through the last one, wanting to see the ending on the big screen before reading it in print.  It was a long series, but his dad had pulled copies of each one off the library shelf to save for him, as his excitement for the film adaptation of The King of the Things made it the only thing Cecil even talked about anymore...though, it made the young boombox's first few attempts to flirt that much more pitiful.   The cashier tried to look past Cecil, motioning for the next person in line to approach, and he got desperate.  "Hey, maybe if it's good, I can get another pair of tickets and we could see it together?" "I've already seen the movie."  The cashier gave him a look of disdain.  "The hot elf dies." With the tickets in hand, Cecil sadly stepped over to his parents to hand them off, shuddering.  "...The elf doesn't die, right Dad?  She had to be kiddin' around about that, right?" Edward just pulled at his collar uncomfortably, not daring to say a word either way about the spoiler.   The three found an empty spot in the movie theater lobby to wait until showtime, close to the noisy arcade machines tucked into one corner, but Cecil didn't bolt for one of them like usual, just staring at the floor tiles after his rejection.  Quietly, behind his back, his parents played a quick round of rock-paper-scissors to see who'd get to reassure him this time. Scissors beat paper, and Anna gently laid her arm across Cecil's shoulders, squeezing him close to her despite his protests.  "Honey, you were so excited to see this movie, up until you talked to her.  Now it's like everything's acid rainclouds and sadness. You wanna talk to me about it?" "Mom..."  Blushing again, and glancing around to make sure no one saw them, Cecil tried to pull away, but his mother held on tight.  Cecil had to get his stubbornness from somewhere, after all.  "...I'm really gonna be the only boy in my grade without a girlfriend, aren't I?" Anna blinked at the question.   Both she and her husband knew their son was growing up fast, the way he'd started getting embarrassed whenever they hugged him in public, and the way he'd begged them for prescription sunglasses despite there not being any sunlight in the Dark World just so he would look like the characters in his favorite teen movies, and the way he'd started very uncomfortably taking his first steps into the world of romance. "I'm sure you're not the only one without one, Cessie!" "I am," Cecil shot back, cupping his head in shame.  To him, it seemed like overnight that the age-old rivalry between the boys and the girls in his class had come to a ceasefire, with the two sides mingling on the playground and during study hall.  Two by two, everyone seemed to pair off, the different cliques switching around, leaving Cecil behind like always.  "Every single boy's got a girlfriend already except me!  Well, and the two guys who are with each other.  But I can't even get a girl to talk to me, much less date me!" "Do you want a girlfriend, Honey?" "No!  I mean, yes.  I mean..."  He groaned, sinking to the floor and gripping his knees.  "I just want everyone to stop makin' fun of me.   It's bad enough I wear glasses, and read books, and..."  He folded his hands, instinctively hiding them from view. But, Anna took one of them, gripping it and weaving her fingers in between his as she knelt next to him and smiled.  "I'm sure you're not the only boy your age who doesn't have a girlfriend," she repeated.  "Some of the kids in your class might only be doing it for the same reason you are, they don't want to get left out.  But someday, Honey, I know you're gonna find someone really special, who loves you just as much as your dad and I do." Edward tapped her on the shoulder, pointing out the time.   "Hey, we better go find our seats before all the good ones get taken!" Sniffing, and glad his sunglasses hid his watery eyes from view, Cecil jumped up, following his parents into the theater, his excitement slowly returning with his mother's words.  Tonight, it was all about the movie again, with dating and finding that special someone at the very back of his CPU, and tomorrow...he couldn't wait. --- "Honk, honk!"  The tiny green CD player rolled their tiny green toy car across the back of the playground bench, until it went right off the side and down the armrest, to race across the seat as well.  But, that of course meant Cakes needed to stand out of the way, and so did the aide on duty that day.   She was relatively new to the job, having only been with the orphanage a few months, but Cakes had already taken to her, the green Addison's pixels making them feel an instant connection.  And so, on the childrens' first outing to the nearby playground with her in charge, Cakes and their toy car stuck to her like glue, seeming to not even notice all the others playing together elsewhere. They pushed the car forward, threatening to bump into the aide's thigh as she failed to get up in time, but Cakes blinked and cocked their head curiously as it simply phased through her instead -- evidently, they were still too young to understand what a hologram was.  But, she retrieved the car and, with a smile, passed it back to the little robot, who'd already shifted their focus onto a nearby dent in the metallic ground nearby, which would serve as an excellent ramp. "Cakes," she addressed them, as the car made a perfect landing, "don't you have any friends who might like to play cars with you, too?" They looked up at her, confused.  Of course they didn't.  Why would they need anyone else in order to play? The aide looked around, studying the playground, and then gripped Cakes by the shoulder, gently nudging them towards a yellow Addison child playing nearby, who they'd never seen before.   "Cakes, do you see that little boy over there?  He's playing all by himself, so why don't you go and ask if he wants to play with you and your car, and be your friend?" They hesitated at first, trying to resist.  Cakes was fine by themself, they were having plenty of fun just playing pretend on their bench racetrack!  But, clutching their car to their chest and steeling themself, Cakes trudged across the playground to where the aide had pointed. They gave the boy a big smile -- if nothing else, they could always make a good first impression.  "Hi, my name's Cakes.  Do you wanna be my friend?" The boy stared at them, giving Cakes an odd look that they couldn't quite parse, then glanced down at the toy in their hands, and finally gave a smug smile.   "Sure.  Let's play." The Addison had a few dolls spread out on the metallic ground in front of them, plastic and wearing different outfits, one of which happened to resemble a mechanic which he pointed out went quite well with Cakes' car.  He spun up a story of the doll being the car's owner, fixing it up after it'd broken down, which Cakes went along with even if it meant it couldn't drive anymore -- it gave them a chance to examine the other dolls, and the colorful dresses and suits they all wore.  Another one was dressed as a ballerina, and Cakes had fun twirling them around in the air, with its owner's permission of course, and as they played they kept glancing towards their car, wondering when the repairs would be complete and they and their new friend could drive it across the playground. But, it sadly didn't come to pass, as soon the boy's mother called to him to pick up his toys and get ready to leave. "Okay, one sec mom!"  He scooped up all of the dolls in his arms, including the ballerina and the mechanic, and including Cakes' car, which made them yelp in surprise.   "Wait a second, that one's mine!" The boy just winked.  "We're friends now, right?  And friends always share their toys, that's what my mom said!" "They do?"  Cakes had heard that they had to share toys with the other kids at the orphanage, since they only had so many to go around, but this was the first time they'd heard the same for friends.  "I don't have a mom.  But, that's my favorite car.  Maybe I can share a different toy with you?" "I'll just bring it next time my mom takes me here, and you can have it back then!"  His mother called again, sounding more impatient, and the Addison waved goodbye as best he could with all his toys in his hands, leaving Cakes standing there with nothing.   "Cakes, there you are!"  They finally noticed the older Addison aide calling for the rest of the children as well, to lead them back to the orphanage before it got late.  "How'd it go, did you two have fun?" "Yeah!"  They remembered the fun they'd had with the ballerina doll.  "Do you think I can learn to do ballet dancing someday?" "Um...sure.  Someday.  But, Cakes, where'd your car go?  Didn't you have it earlier?" "He said friends share toys, so I shared it with him!  And he took it home when he left."  They grinned, proud at how good a friend they'd been, even without a mom to tell them how to do so, but the aide didn't seem to share their excitement, actually opening her eyes in shock. "Cakes..."  Kneeling down, she gripped the little CD player's shoulders.  "It's nice to share your toys when you're playing, but when you're done you need to make sure you get them back!" "He said he'll bring it back so we can share it again!" "Oh, Cakes..."  She sighed deeply; they just didn't seem to understand.  "I don't think he'll bring it back, honey.  I'm not even sure if you'll ever see him again.  He might've...done something very mean, by taking your car away." Cakes' expression dropped.  "So...he isn't really my friend?" "No."  She sighed deeply, struggling to change the topic.  "But, if you try really hard, someday you'll have lots of friends who you can share all your toys with, and they'll care about them just as much as they care about you!" "Really?!"  The possibility made Cakes almost forget about the boy they'd played with.  They didn't need friends...but they'd had fun that day.  They couldn't wait for more friends to have fun with, even if they had to share their toys. As Cakes smiled, so did the aide, taking the CD player's hand.  "Come on, Cakes.  You can help me round everyone up!"

[kattahj]

Okay, so, trying to weed through the reasons Last Twilight is losing me emotionally, and it turns out there are more than I thought.

Please note that there's still a lot I like about this show! I'll still keep watching it! This is just about the negative stuff while I sort out my feelings.

On the other hand, the negative stuff is NEGATIVE, so read at your own peril!

1. I'm not sure I buy these two as boyfriends. The initial banter was great, but now they're together, and they still feel like chums.

2. Follow-up: I'm not convinced, in general, that they're strong enough actors for this story. There have been plenty of shows for me that manage to sell ridiculous plots through strong performances. This show is the other way around: it's fairly solid but demands a LOT of its actors, and sometimes I just don't buy the result.

3. Acknowledging that I may just be expecting too much, because it's Aof and I've been waiting for it for so long. But looking back, there was quite a bit in his other shows that was sold by the performances, and now I retroactively question my judgement of those shows too, which makes me sad.

4. I don't like the Mee story. I enjoyed the Little Prince reference in episode 1 because it's a book I'm already familiar with and emotionally invested in, but Mee's story just feels cloying and manipulative. It feels like they don't trust the scenes well enough on their own and have to add commentary to make sure I have the right reactions to them. And then I still don't! Because I resent being told what to feel!

5. We're hitting a lot of disability clichés, which maybe wouldn't be so bad if they weren't treated as profound. Again, I feel like I'm being emotionally manipulated, rather than allowed to arrive at those emotions on my own.

(Sidenote: the trope of a blind person touching someone's face to "see" them was pretty much ruined for me by one of those "ask a blind person" segments, where they went, "Yeah, we don't do that," except for one guy who went, "I do it to pick up sighted girls, they love that stuff.")

6. We are completely losing Mhok's story in the process. Maybe we'll get back to it later, IDK, but right now he serves primarily as the "inexperienced able-bodied person teaching disabled person how to live their own damn life" trope that I have already talked about hating.

7. A lot will still depend on where this story is heading. (If they do magical healing I am done. I think they won't, but I don't trust it.)

8. Some fan reactions are making it worse,  especially in the youtube comments, where they really lean into the most maudlin interpretations.

9. Things like the dad showing up just feels like they drop melodrama in there for the sake of it, and without being willing to properly engage with it. Compare and contrast Jam's appearance in Moonlight Chicken, where the emotions felt so much more honest and well handled... but again, better actors...

10. The way Day projects his own shitty driving onto Night isn't WRONG for the series, it may even be GOOD, but it did put me in a bad mood that may have influenced my ability to engage with the rest of the episode.

11. Nitpicking, but I just don't get them giving Last Twilight as a wedding gift. I mean, obviously I get it on a symbolic level, but on a practical level, why would you give a book to the person who recommended it to you, and so presumably already has it? And why would you give a book missing its last page to anyone?

12. With everything else stacking up, that final scene on the mountain just felt like someone was spraying whipped cream into my mouth while blasting "Memory" on high volume = may be a high point for others, just makes me feel like I'm choking on dairy and violins.

ETA 13: A MLC gifset just reminded me – the product placements in Last Twilight really feel shoehorned in.

[ocareyna]

My Imperial City Ocarina Bass C and Night By Noble Alto C, and the little miracle story of how I got them

[Originally posted on Reddit here]

For a while now, I’ve been interested in getting an ocarina, and because Christmas was approaching, I decided to buy myself one as a gift. The thing was, which kind would I get? I liked the sound of altos but worried that in person, the high pitch would hurt my ears. On the other hand, I adored how basses sound, but even a plastic one was way out of my budget. After posting some questions on this sub, I decided to just ask God what He thought of it all and went to sleep.

When I awoke, a notification was waiting for me: u/SeienShin offered to give me his old bass C ICO ocarina! I am just overwhelmed with gratitude for his generosity. After weeks of waiting for my precious new-slash-old ocarina to traverse the ocean, it finally arrived a couple days ago. Thank you again, u/SeienShin!!

But the story doesn’t stop there…

While I was waiting for my bass to arrive, I received an email from Ebay: the alto NbN that I had been eyeing before had significantly dropped in price. Nowhere else online was it available for that cheap, but I had already spent my budget on shipping the bass, so what could I do? After I bemoaned my first-world tale of woe to my parents, the last thing I expected was that their response would be, “We’re giving you cash for Christmas, and don’t you dare think of using it on school loans. Get the other ocarina!”

Without further ado, I present to you, 하루 (Haru) and よる (Yoru):

[Pictures and ocarina reviews under the cut]

Yoru’s name comes from the Japanese word 夜, which means “night” (as in NbN).

Impressions:

The NbN is heavier than I expected. Since it’s plastic, I thought it would feel like a toy, but this is one solid ocarina.

I wish that there was a groove for the subholes...

The high notes don’t hurt my ears!! I have high sensory sensitivities but I’m pleasantly surprised that I can handle them. This ocarina is pretty loud, though. Thanks to a suggestion from u/idayam, wearing a face mask while playing significantly muffles the sound, but the pitch does sound a bit altered to me.

Haru is “day” in Korean. I was hoping to find a Chinese name since the ICO was crafted in China, but “Haru” matched “Yoru” so nicely in both meanings and sounds that I couldn’t resist.

Impressions:

The sound is GORGEOUS, and the vibrations from the resonance are so fun. I feel like I get swept away when I play this.

The subholes have grooves for my fingers! The finger holes in general are pretty big compared to the NbN, but I manage to cover them pretty well except for the left pinky hole. That one is so wide, I can fit my pinky in until the first knuckle! After a short while, that finger starts to hurt from trying to stay in position. Does anyone have any tips?

The size makes it hard to see the left hand holes, but I think I’m doing pretty well regarding that. Still, it’s weird to switch to the NbN and suddenly see everything again. Not a problem though!

Anyways, I’m having such a fun time learning the ocarina. I’ve played a bit of piano and dabbled in violin, but this is my first woodwind. It’s such an interesting experience to think about how breath pressure or tongue movements affect the sound.

Also, since I received both of these ocarinas secondhand, I cleaned them with antibacterial soap. I dunked the NbN in a bowl of soap + water, and I wiped the outside of the ICO with soap + water and stuck a piece of soapy paper through the mouthpiece. I wasn't sure how the clay would react if I immersed it in water too, but since it hasn't been played in years, the cleaning was really just an extra precaution.

Whoops, this post is longer than I had anticipated, so I’ll post my videos separately.

If you read this far, thanks! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

[larrysballetslippers]

MY (first listen) FITF THOUGHTS

Here you will find my direct live reaction to the greatest album of all time. I wrote it down in my notebook, so it's transcribed here. I will show you the pics, but don't even try reading, it's a mess. I might add some second listen thoughts in the future.

The Greatest

Great opener, just hits so good in the core.

The violins were like so unexpected but so nice.

Live will smash.

Written All Over Your Face

"The atmosphere is so COLD" (I loved the high note I think)

LARRY bc LARRY

THE FUCKING BASS!! Matt my angel

Ooooh wow oooh

Jonas Brothers vibes?

Bigger Than Me

You know I will shake my ass to this forever.

"I don't hear them anymore" FAVE (favorite lyrics of the song)

Fits great on the album up to now. (IT DOES BB)

Lucky Again

Fireproof's big sis. Yeah I have heard the leaks, deal with it. (I was full of energy still... poor bb)

"Cinema" has my heart. (I love the change)

OOH AHH

THE BASS and DRUMS

That riff at the second verse omg, synths? (Still don't know)

Boy I am so whipped for his voice.

Face the music

Guitar OMG Intro OMG

"YOUNG", "REALITY" (lyrics haha)

OMG OMG. What is this genre? MCR? No omg, ummm ( don't know what I wrote there)

Bbg? Stunts? This is quite gay?

Chicago

It's slow?????

Mummmm? (You will see me lose my mind hahha)

OH? My heart omg! This is giving soft rock this is just omg

THE Fucking chorus

I know it's not that, but it gived me unrequited love vibes.

VIOLINS

All This Time

Oh? OMG The jump scare

Omg? Yes king, whisper in my ear

That lift! Road trip vibes.

What is this about?

Damn that lift is just wow

Christmas vibes hahahha sorry

Not my fave but so cool.

OOMS

Change up from last song but not that abrupt. (I liked the transition)

"I am only half of what I think I could be." Yes king, me too, quarter maybe. (Lol I was just vibing here)

The bridge has my heart

Banger.

Headline

Oh love that (intro)!! Dancing in the moonlight??

Groovy omg love

Road trip vibes

"Shortest forever"? High school babe?

Writing playlist yep (so great for writing)

Saturdays

Oooh love that intro

I'm a simp for Louis' voice (who would have thought?)

The guitar riff PAIN

PAIN. PAIN for 1.20 minutes already.

AAAH "Some things change"

That BASS that comes in

VIOLINS (it will get worse my girl)

I'm pretty stable today (mentally), but DAMN

WTF!!

Louis bro? The fuck? Have mercy

Don't end like that. Don't do that to me

Silver tongues

This after.... (Saturdays), bro

Talking in the next song. I'm overstimulated

SIBWAWC

Oh no (she says before clicking on the song)

Oh? "Yeah"? Okay?

I froze for a sec

Omg omg omg

Omg I have no words (omg apparently)

"Surrounded by light"? (me stunned)

Oh my

"ARE WE ME OR ARE WE YOU"... wow omg

Common People

Lou, I'm overstimulated, please don't hurt me? (Poor bb, you will cry)

Ah, oh no

Oh no

Oh no no no "oooh"

Oh my heart

Fuck! The bridge/end OMG

The guitar solo, don't, I, please, omg

Angels Fly ♡

Oh no

Please no

FUUUCK

... well... I'm done... Give Louis a Grammy, give him the world... I'm crying this... I can't (the chorus really killed me if that wasn't clear)

Holding Onto Heartache

How am I supposed to move on. Louis please make my ass shake.

Oh no, okay? Oh.... love the guitar. Summer (vibes)

Oh? Lyrics... he's a god.

He oooh's in this album

Road trip vibes again

OH, the bridge... boy help me. Fucking good.

TTWLG

Love love

My friends' exact words... pain (a lyrics)

LYRICS

"OOHH AAHH"!!!!

FUCKING VIOLINS (I have clearly lost it here)

I CAN'T ANYMORE. Mom pick me up, Louis is hurting me.

Well... I'm done now... what now?

[29pageshomestuckeveryday]

Homestuck, page 4,572

[S] Prince of Heart: Rise up.

song used: Time on My Side by Tensei

song commentary:

Tensei:

With the Strife album, I deliberately left a lot of the background to the songs very ambiguous. There are no direct, obvious references as to what song corresponds to which character, though there are quite a few indications: each song uses an instrument that is typically associated with one of the kids in a pretty prominent way: whether it’s the piano lead in Heir Conditioning, the solo violin in Dance of Thorns, the bass and flute (shakuhachi, actually) in Atomic Bonsai, and of course the sampled beats and scratches in Time on my Side. I suppose the titles count as somewhat vague references to the characters as well.

With that said, I’m still not going to explicitly say “This song is actually a strife theme for Dave” or something like that. If Andrew chooses to interpret it as a good backdrop for a fight between Dirk and Jake, I am totally fine with that. Hell, I can totally see it working (And in fact it DID work, since the flash turned out pretty damn awesome)

I always felt like this song was a bit of the odd man out on the album. While I definitely think Dance of Thorns and Atomic Bonsai were awesome in their own right, they also feel a lot more ‘conventional’ compared to this song.

In a lot of ways, this song is actually very minimalistic. The droning bassline and guitar chugs stay on the same chord for almost a full minute while the buildup is mostly done through sound effects and overlayed orchestral sounds.

IMO, this results in giving the :53 point, where the chords finally start switching up, a much bigger impact (though the full Beatdown motif coming in probably helps too).

Something similar happens at 2:04 where after 30 seconds of the Black motif remaining on the same chord again, you get another switch, and everything just sounds huuuuuuge.

Appropriately to the title, this song has a lot of weird time-shit going on. Disc scratching in and of itself can actually be treated as a nice metaphor for time manipulation (the comic itself definitely makes grateful use of it), so it’s no wonder that it’s almost omnipresent here.

By far the neatest thing, in my opinion, is 2:35 though. The effect you hear there is actually the ENTIRE SONG up until that point, played in reverse, and sped up so it fits in a couple of seconds. The idea is literally that it ‘scratches’ and resets the song, much in the same way as happens to the entire universe in the comic, so it can lay down a wicked wah-guitar solo over the ‘scratched’ version of the song.

So yes, this song travels back in time in order to make itself awesomer.

Joking aside, this song, like most other ones I make, does also have some sneaky hidden references.

The guitar riff at 3:18, for example, is cribbed pretty much note for note from the Metallica song Master of Puppets (maybe this is a Dirk song after all?). The background strings at :37 have a very similar ascending chromatic pattern the intro to the James Bond theme. The high staccato strings at 1:50 are supposed to be reminiscent of the theme from Psycho, or really every slasher flick ever. (Black is associated with Jack Noir, Jack Noir likes to show people his stabs, etc.)

The original inspiration for this song probably comes from the least likely source imaginable. It’s not The Prodigy or Goldeneye 64 music, but actually the original score to the movie Space Jam. You probably don’t even know or remember it, but a lot of the songs have a very distinct looped hiphop beat, guitars, and orchestral stabs all over the place, much like a large portion of this song.

Seriously, listen to this from about 0:50 onward and you should hear the resemblance.

That aside, obviously stuff from The Prodigy’s Fat of the Land album bears some resemblance as well, especially with the cheesy bassline. I know that a few Prodigy songs have been used in the otherwise kinda shitty Charlie’s Angels movies whenever shit was about to go down, and that’s really the kind of vibe I was going for as well.

[brown-little-robin]

Jason Todd Playlist

This is for Lu. Ily and I love your music ramblings so here’s some of mine. My Jason Todd playlist, in order, the main sections explained:

1) Behind the Wall to Fast Car: Jason Todd’s early childhood. Gotham police corruption (Behind the Wall), Jason’s endurance in a dissonant world (middle three songs: first one about being born to a world that will hit you and keep hitting, and the second two featuring some fairly harsh sounds, at least to my ears), and then Fast Car:

You got a fast car Is it fast enough so we can fly away? We gotta make a decision Leave tonight or live and die this way...

Fast car?? get it?? like the Batmobile? But also, starting from zero, got nothing to lose... finally see what it means to be living. Jason’s reckoning with his own awful life here. And the section about taking care of her father the alcoholic?? Jason with his mother. It’s perfect.

2) Jason becoming Robin. Charge of the Batmobile, of course. Then I’m ready. Jason is impatient!! Then Little Birdie, which just kills me (in a good way) applied to Robin. Little birdie, little birdie, why do you fly so high? It’s because I am a true birdie / and I do not fear to die. And finally she’s got her ticket / I think she’s gonna use it / think she’s gonna fly away... no one should try to stop her / persuade her with their power... Jason is set on this road and nothing can stop him. He’s going to fly.

3) Troubles with Robin. Jason argues with Batman, as do all of the Robins. Why do the babies starve? There’s enough food to feed the world! Well, in this one he’s arguing with Bruce Wayne, I guess. He’s passionate about wealth distribution. Then Batman Is Mad At Me Again (remix) my beloved, no notes. Shout by Tears For Fears! Jason speaks up when he wants to. Irrepressible. But also? this song is about speaking out when things Aren’t Right. you shouldn’t have to jump for joy. Then the Bond theme because Jason is a nerd. Then the Finale from Trio for horn, violin and piano, foreshadowing. Then Jason finally asking for love, doing what he does best: making a demand.

You can wait 'til morning comes You can wait for the new day You can wait and lose this heart You can wait and soon be sorry

Now love's the only thing that's free We must take it where it's found Pretty soon it may be costly

Love costs him his life in the next section.

4) A Death In the Family, the actual soundtrack to Jason’s death. Then the resurrection, the soundtrack to Wolverine getting his metal bones. Agonizing. But it’s fun music nonetheless.

5) The white-hot heat of Lazarus rage. Screaming, near-nonsensical songs. Very punk.

(note the bird imagery in Novocaine, too!)

6) Red Hood’s debut. Down the River, full of righteous rage; When The Coyote Comes, a song celebrating a predator and his devilish, fear-inspiring approach. These are a little calmer than the Lazarus songs, but still he is dead-set on his terrible path.

7) Jason being called back to the family. A window opens up / and someone calls your name / but I can tell you don’t know how to play this game... Actually, here:

So now you’re on your own Won't you come back home To see you're not that kind And find the strength To find the strength To find another way

And then a song for Jason’s response to that: Broken, mostly wailing, wordless guitar, but with a heartbreaking little set of lyrics at the end:

Broken We are broken

In my mind's eye One little boy anger one little man Funny how time flies

Then Achilles Come Down, which I have in the clean version because I don’t like listening to swearing. I imagine this one specifically as Tim’s near-suicidal plea for Jason to come back: if you go I’m going / so jump and I’m jumping.

8) Jason’s slow path to building relationships again. First a rejection in Howl: I hunt for you with bloody feet across the hallowed ground. Titans Tower near-killing of Tim, much? Then Freedom—he’s realizing he just wants to be allowed to have his own perspective. Then he’s becoming softer, but still fighting for himself in My life:

I don't need you to worry for me 'cause I'm alright I don't want you to tell me it's time to come home I don't care what you say anymore this is my life Go ahead with your own life, leave me alone

Then, for the first time, acceptance. A house is a home even when there's ghosts / Even when you gotta run from the ones who love you most. Jason realizing that he was in the wrong.

And then, finally, one last song:

Forgive me Is all that you can't say Years gone by and still Words don't come easily Like forgive me, forgive me

But you can say baby Baby, can I hold you tonight?

Baby bird, baby bird, can I hold you. Baby bird, will you forgive me. And! We bring it back to Tracy Chapman in the end.

9) Jason outro: The Bat’s True Calling, slow and mournful, regretful, but dignified. Acceptance of his own grief. And, finally, of course, Batman Theme Reprise. Back to that breathless, whirling experience of the Batmobile, Jason’s first taste of freedom in this playlist. Jason’s passionate spirit simply cannot be repressed.

[boba-beom]

fr you can take them everywhere without having to buy/carry some heavy ass amp 🫠 aww that is so cute though that the guitar has been with you for that long🥺 i have a classical guitar that's been with me since i was 13 and an electric one that's been with me ever since i was 15 i think?

anyways, i've always thought about attaching one of those devices to my classical guitar so i could turn it into electric-acoustic as well, but i feel like when it comes to electric acoustic guitars, it's always better to buy one and not diy one.

i love how this is something we have in common though🥺

the middle school i went to required us to learn different pieces on the flute and get graded on them. we had a book all about it and that's how i learned hehe. it is indeed a beautiful instrument though and i find it fascinating how you can produce different sounds through it just with your breath. and it's honestly pretty easy to learn and with your musical background, i'm sure you'd pick it up really quick :") ahh, the harp is such a magical instrument. it's so calming and relaxing <3 wooow i'm always highly impressed by people who can play the violin, because it's not easy instrument at all. and self taught piano? respect. are you secretly a music genius too? 👀👀

my best friend actually taught me some piano and i also learned some things on my own, but i haven't played the piano that much ever since he moved across the world :/ nowadays, i mostly use the piano when i'm trying to guess the chords/notes in a song.

it's always nice to hear the perspective of other people on creative work tbh, cause everyone perceives things differently. i think that's my favorite thing about literature - how subjective it is🥺

ah, i see. i didn't know that. and thank you smiles🥺 have you had any time to look at txt's tour? ash blue taehyun has me WEAK to my knees fr wow it looks so good on him!! i think you really manifested that into reality. also the choreography to tinnitus is so good, i just love groovy it is. also the way soobin and taehyun did their parts, whoosh, i'm dizzy. anyway, beomgyu really ate it up, i think tinnitus suits him so much.🥺 and also the choreography for farewell neverland is so beautiful like wow, i have no words?? they all looked so stunning and the vocals were so good.

p.s: black is one of favorite haircolors on soob but i kinda miss blond hair soob, it looked so good on him. also whoever has been styling kai's hair so far needs a raise, because he looks way too good.

I did used to have a classical guitar before my dad gifted me the electro-acoustic one. but yes, I guess you could diy it, it's just a hassle and a little tedious but some electro-acoustics are pricey too, especially now with inflation 😭 but omg you have an electric one!! and how is it? I also love how we have that in common, I feel like I love talkingt o people about guitars and I can go on for a while hehe

I wouldn't say music genius 🤭 I've just always been interested in performing and doing covers. It's funny actually, because I could never do a speech in front of my class but I could perform a set of songs in front of majority of my high school peers, I just find it fun that way

I never actually got graded for piano and I've wanted to take lessons but with the pace of how my life was and is going I feel like I wouldn't have the time atm :< maybe in the future I'll pick it up again. I do have a keyboard in my room and the last song I learnt was billie eilish' my future. omg trying to find chords and notes by ear can be hard, unless you have perfect pitch? 👀 but that's nice that you learn from someone else, it's fun like that.

you're so right, like music, art, writing — they're all subjective and it's up to how people interpret it, I love it :>

omg YES I can't believe you remembered me manifesting periwinkle blue tyun hehe, it really does suit him and I hope his hair colour stays like that throughout the whole tour. I still have hope that I'll see them late this year IF they release europe/uk tour dates. the choreo for tinnitus is SO CATCHY like the vibes and the whole lot is just a masterpiece 🤭 farewell, neverland really is beautiful. something about that gives me contemporary dance and I love that for them, especially hueningkai's solo that he does? they're so graceful I love it. oh and blue spring? I told myself I need to go to their concert so I can hear them sing it and sing it with them. I got emotional the first time I heard it. all the emotion is there and again, another tubatu x moa song <3 they really love us :')

I was really hoping soobin would be a different colour but black, solely because he went from black hair, to blonde and to black hair again :(( I was hoping he'd be a light brown at least but black does suit him a lot. as for kai, his hair styled so far has been beautiful. oh and yeonjun and beomgyu with their long hair? long hair tubatu has a special place in my heart, honestly 💕

how have you been, lovely?