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#what if i sobbed.
lookitseddie · 1 year
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do you ever just think about 'you're the reason i had her, okay? i thought that if i did a decent job raising her, then there was chance she'd turn out like you.' and collapse to the ground in emotion. i sure do
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sabellart · 9 months
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“I think I understand a whole lot better than you do”
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stargirl230 · 4 months
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thanks for the light
I was just trying to figure out how procreate works but then the op brainworms got to me and 35 hours later here we are! can you tell I miss home-cooked meals :')
(no reposts; reblogs appreciated)
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kaogens · 3 months
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mikus once again :P
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while we wait.
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may i offer you all a pubby?? lil bby barns?
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Honestly, I think from the moment that Percy found out that not every demigod has a loving mortal parent they can depend on, when they already can't depend on the gods, and that Annabeth specifically, hasn't had anyone take care of her like that since she was 7, he decided he would be the one to.
They take care of each other up to that point, but I think that's when he starts noticing how much she takes care of them. She already knew if she didn't no one else will. She protects them against humans, she stands with them against monsters, she always brings up the rear of the group when they're running, and she is always the first one to make a move when they're fighting. She does it because no one is going to protect her if she doesn't do it herself. No one is going to protect Grover and Percy if she isn't.
In the arch, he pretty much tells her he would fight the gods for her, and then he goes on to do just that.
Athena, the one person who was supposed to protect her willingly pushes monsters her way, she lets Echidna and the chimera into a place that was supposed to be safe. Her decision is that Annabeth should be punished, and say what you want, but I think she knew that Annabeth would think through every scenario and know that someone had to stay and hold them back. And I think she knew that Annabeth would be the one to stay. Because that's the way she raised her, knowing that no one cared whether she lived or died. And I think that's the cruellest part.
Which is why Percy's sacrifice means so much more. He not only made the decision to trade his life for hers and fight the monster so she and Grover could escape, but he also made the conscious choice to push back against Athena's wishes. He fought a goddess for her, Athena said "Annabeth will die for her impertinence" and Percy said "Not today, not ever"
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Achievement unlocked: discovered piece of media at exact right time in your life to experience maximum peak emotional impact and infatuation
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going through my old journals as part of therapy homework and i'm reading a section written in the emotional wreckage of a full-on breakdown when i get hit with this line:
There is never a satisfying answer to ‘Why didn’t they love me?’
like wow babe. good fucking point
#like you were on the ground biting the carpet and dry sobbing while you wrote that and still. good fucking point#not a shitpost#cptsd#and it's true. there's never a satisfying answer#the truth is i know why i wasn't loved#i analyzed my parent's traumas and abuse to death. i understand why i alienated and was alienated from my siblings#i know why my mom was too overwhelmed to be capable of nurturing#i know why my dad vanished into addiction and avoidance#the details of our cycles of trauma and cptsd and family history i have a phd in all of it#i understood perfectly. i spent years studying and now i knew the answer#and guess what? IT WAS NOT SATISFYING!!!#because they still didn't love me! and i still couldn't change that!#it was still a completely unsatisfying state of affairs!#so like. when the people who are supposed to love you...don't.#when the people who are supposed to take care of you...fail to#you can look for answers and reasons and explanations#but that's not actually going to FIX your situation.#and it's probably not within your ability TO fix the situation. (and definitely not your job)#because you don't need answers--you need a new situation#*inserts Just Walk Out. You Can Leave!!! (Running Skeleton) Meme*#and yes. walking out isn't always possible.#but for you i hope it will be one day soon. and i hope you build the courage to take that leap.#stepping away from the people who failed to love you...it feels like being untethered but also like being lighter than air#new and scary. immensely relieving. the future opens up. empty but empty like a canvas. blindingly bright until your eyes adjust#like climbing out of a pit you called home and for the first time realizing how bright the light of day can truly be#when you aren't just getting glimpses from the bottom of a hole
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lotus-pear · 3 months
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lore accurate teen soukoku. the worsties ever
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baffledartistry · 28 days
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this fucking parallel gets me every time
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buppkizz · 8 months
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tf2 karaoke! 🎤🎶
(here's a list of the referenced+a couple extra songs)
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beeqisch · 8 days
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who wants to be best friends who secretly hold hands very platonically
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ashstfu · 7 months
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spoopup · 9 months
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professor layton beam GO !
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+ a gif of them talking !!! the gif messes up a bit but idk how to fix it and stuff so. bleh
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biting is a love language biting is a love language Biting Is A Love Language-
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me: oh look ao3 is down.
me: is this...a sign...to be productive??? To get off the internet???
also me: ...nahhhh *proceeds to mourn the death of ao3 and await its resurrection on tumblr instead*
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