#what that means is bde honestly

[pucksandpower]

So Good to Her

Charles Leclerc x Reader

Summary: the public reacts to the TikTok challenge you and Charles inadvertently participated in

Read So Good to Me (about the TikTok challenge) here

The TikTok that the British influencer posted of his encounter with you and your incredibly generous boyfriend quickly goes viral, racking up millions of views, likes, and comments within mere hours.

It spreads like wildfire across social media platforms, with people sharing it on Twitter, Instagram, Facebook — even LinkedIn of all places. Everyone marvels at this mystery woman with the boyfriend of all boyfriends who casually sent her €10,000 just to buy a pair of shoes.

In a cozy London flat, a group of university students and diehard Charles fans gather around a laptop, eyes wide as they watch the now-viral video for the umpteenth time.

“I can’t believe Charles has a secret girlfriend!” Megan, a petite blonde wearing a red Ferrari cap, exclaims. “How did we not know about this? We follow his every move!”

Her best friend Ethan nods in agreement, his brow furrowed. “Seriously, who is this girl? She’s drop dead gorgeous and apparently Charles is just casually sending her 10 grand for shopping sprees?”

“Okay but like, goals though,” Lexi chimes in dreamily, clutching a Charles Leclerc poster to her chest. “Imagine having a boyfriend who’s not only mega hot and talented but also spoils you rotten. She’s living the dream.”

Ethan scoffs and rolls his eyes. “Oh come on, he can’t just throw money around like that. I bet this whole thing was staged for clout.”

Megan shoots him a withering glare. “Don’t be ridiculous. What would be the point? Charles is already one of the most popular drivers on the grid, he doesn’t need to pull PR stunts for attention.”

“Plus did you see the way he talked to her on the phone?” Lexi points out, rewinding the video. “That was not acting, that was real love and affection in his voice. I’m so soft for them already, ugh.”

The trio falls silent as they watch the clip again, zeroing in on every little detail and facial expression from both Charles’ mystery girlfriend and the clearly shocked TikToker.

Ethan chuckles and shakes his head. “I still can’t get over her reaction though. Just a guy who loves driving fast cars — I mean, the cheek! She really knows how to keep a secret, gotta give her that.”

“An icon, honestly,” Megan declares. “The fact that she told him to donate the money to an animal shelter too ... okay, I can’t even be mad. She seems like a sweet person.”

Lexi sighs happily, starry-eyed. “They’re literally a power couple. The sheer confidence and BDE of it all. I’m so jealous but also like, rooting for them? We have to find out who this girl is!”

As if on cue, Megan’s phone pings with a Twitter notification. Her eyes widen as she swipes to view it. “Guys. GUYS. The TikToker just confirmed her first name is Y/N and posted another video with a few more details about her!”

“Well don’t just sit there, play it!” Ethan demands, practically launching himself across the couch to peer over Megan’s shoulder at her phone screen. Lexi scrambles to join them, bouncing with anticipation.

In the new clip, the TikToker is grinning excitedly at the camera, an extra bounce in his step as he walks along the same Monaco street where he first approached you.

“Right, so I’m sure by now you’ve all seen my video with Charles Leclerc’s girlfriend go absolutely mental viral,” he begins, running a hand through his artfully tousled hair. “Which, can I just say — thank you so much for the insane support and love, you lot are the best fans ever.”

“Get to the point,” Ethan mutters under his breath, earning a sharp “Shh!” from both girls.

“Anyway,” the TikToker continues. “After she left and I finally picked my jaw up off the floor, I did some digging. I headed to that little boutique she mentioned in the call with Charles, just to see if she actually went in and bought anything. Thought maybe if I asked the staff, they might be able to give me some more info, you know?”

Megan, Ethan, and Lexi all subconsciously lean closer to the small phone screen, hanging on to his every word.

“So get this — not only did she buy the shoes, she apparently also went next door and purchased, and I quote, a frankly alarming amount of lingerie. The cashier said she dropped over 5 grand like it was nothing!”

Lexi lets out a scandalized gasp as Ethan chokes on his sip of Red Bull. Megan just shakes her head in wonderment. “The actual legend,” she murmurs reverently.

The TikToker laughs and waggles his eyebrows suggestively at the camera. “I don’t know about you lot, but I’m definitely sensing some spicy thank you for the shopping money activities were planned for a certain Ferrari driver, if you know what I mean. Get in there, Charles!”

“Gross, I so did not need that visual,” Ethan grumbles, but there’s a slight smirk playing on his lips all the same.

“Oh shut up, as if you wouldn’t do the exact same if you were dating Charles,” Lexi retorts with a playful shove to his shoulder.

“ANYWAY,” the TikToker presses on, “I did manage to squeeze a few more details out of the lovely shop girl. Apparently Charles’ girlfriend is named Y/N, no last name given for privacy reasons. But she’s a regular customer and, I quote, an absolute sweetheart who only ever has glowing things to say about her man. So there you have it, folks — Y/N and Charles are the real deal and we’re all just peasants watching a fairytale unfold.”

Megan sighs dreamily as the video ends. “Y/N and Charles,” she repeats to herself, already typing the names into her social media search bars. “God, even their names sound good together. I have to find out everything about her.”

“Dibs on making their ship name hashtag go viral,” Lexi calls out, already furiously typing away on her own phone.

Ethan snorts and rolls his eyes affectionately at his friends, but there’s no denying the small, reluctantly impressed smile tugging at the corners of his mouth too. “I give it two days before they’re papped together on some glamorous date night now that the secret’s out. Hope she’s ready for the attention dating an F1 star brings.”

“With that level of confidence and the way Charles clearly adores her? I think our girl Y/N will handle the spotlight just fine,” Megan says confidently.

Lexi nods in firm agreement. “Yep, a true queen. Charles better lock that down and wife her up real quick before one of us tries to snatch her for ourselves!”

***

In a cozy apartment not far from the very street where you had your memorable encounter with the TikToker, three young women huddle around a laptop screen, eyes wide and jaws slack as they watch the now viral video for the umpteenth time.

“I can’t believe this,” mutters Isabelle, a pretty brunette with an impressively encyclopedic knowledge of Formula 1 stats. “Charles has a girlfriend? Since when?”

“And he just sent her €10,000 like it was nothing!” Exclaims Maia, nervously twirling a strand of her platinum blonde hair. “I mean, I know he’s loaded but holy shit, the way he spoils her ...”

The third girl, Claire, bites her lip, a pensive look on her delicate features. “Did you hear what she said at the end though? Just a guy who loves driving fast cars. She was obviously talking about Charles. But the way she said it, all mysterious and like it was some inside joke ... I don’t know, it just rubs me the wrong way.”

Isabelle scoffs and rolls her eyes. “Please, she was totally gloating. Didn’t even have the decency to act a little humble about the fact that THE Charles Leclerc is apparently head over heels for her.”

“Exactly!” Maia chimes in, nodding vigorously. “Like okay, congrats, you bagged a hot, rich, famous race car driver. No need to rub it in the rest of our faces.”

Claire wrinkles her nose. “I just don’t get the vibe that she actually cares about him, you know? I mean, who asks their boyfriend to send them money in the middle of the day for some stupid shoes? While he’s working? She seems like such a gold digger.”

“Ugh, you’re so right,” Isabelle agrees, her lips curling in distaste. “Poor Charles is probably blind to it because he’s so gone for her. He didn’t even hesitate to transfer that money!”

Maia sighs dramatically and falls back on the bed. “God, it’s so unfair. Why can’t I find a man who’s that generous and totally obsessed with me? I’d treat him so much better than she does, you can already tell.”

Claire hums and taps her chin thoughtfully. “You know what, I think this smells fishy. How do we even know she’s actually Charles’ girlfriend? For all we know, she could have paid some guy who sounds like him to play along for a TikTok clout.”

Isabelle’s eyes narrow as she considers this possibility. “That’s true ... I haven’t come across any photos of them together or anything. Why has no one ever seen her before if they’re supposedly so in love?”

“Exactly!” Claire exclaims, growing more animated. “I’ve been a Charles fan for years and I’ve never seen or heard anything about a girlfriend. If they’re really dating, there’s no way it wouldn’t have come out before now.”

Maia sits up, suddenly energized by this new conspiracy theory. “Oh my god, you’re right! She’s probably just some wannabe influencer trying to get famous by pretending to be with Charles. That’s so pathetic.”

Isabelle nods slowly, a determined glint in her eye. “You know what? We should do some digging. Try to find out who this girl really is and expose her for the fraud she clearly is. Charles and the world deserve to know the truth.”

“Yesss, I’m so down for an investigation!” Maia says gleefully. “Imagine if we’re the ones who reveal that this whole thing is fake. We’d be doing Charles a huge favor.”

Claire is already pulling up Instagram and Twitter on her phone. “Let’s start by going through the comments on that TikTok and seeing if anyone has identified her or posted any receipts. There have to be some clues somewhere.”

The girls spend the next few hours poring over social media, searching for any scrap of information they can find about the mystery woman who has supposedly captured Charles Leclerc’s heart. They work themselves into a frenzy, convincing each other more and more that you can’t possibly be Charles’ real girlfriend. In their minds, you’re clearly just an opportunistic clout chaser looking for your 15 minutes of fame.

“God, I hope Charles sees through her act soon,” Isabelle says for the hundredth time, shaking her head. “He’s too good for some two-bit gold digger who’s just using him.”

“We’ll make sure he finds out who she really is,” Claire assures her firmly. “And then he’ll have no choice but to dump her lying ass.”

Maia sighs wistfully, hugging a throw pillow to her chest. “Do you think once he’s single again, I might actually have a chance? Like, if I run into him at a race one day and strike up a conversation, maybe he’ll realize I’m the girl he’s meant to be with ...”

“Okay, let’s not get ahead of ourselves,” Claire says with a laugh. “First step is taking down this fraud of a girlfriend. Then we can daydream about being Mrs. Leclerc.”

The girls giggle and go back to their social media sleuthing with renewed determination. They’ve decided you’re public enemy number one and they won’t rest until they’ve exposed you for the fake, money-hungry, clout-chasing liar they’re certain you must be. In their eyes, they’re crusaders for truth, fighting to save their beloved Charles from your clutches.

What they don’t realize, of course, is just how very real and very deep Charles’ feelings for you actually are ... and that you’re not going anywhere anytime soon, Internet conspiracy theories be damned.

***

In a dimly lit basement somewhere in Italy, a group of die-hard Charles Leclerc fans huddle around a computer screen, their jaws dropping as they watch the video for the umpteenth time.

“Guys, are you seeing this shit?” Enzo, the self-appointed leader of the group, asks incredulously. “Who the hell is this girl and how did she bag Charles freakin’ Leclerc?”

“Dude, we don’t even know for sure that it’s actually Charles,” Giovanni points out skeptically. “She never said his name. It could be some other rich dude with a fast car.”

Enzo scoffs and rolls his eyes. “Oh come on, who else could it be? €10,000 like it’s nothing, is it possible that Leclerc has a secret girlfriend we don’t know about all this time? A guy who likes driving fast cars? It’s obviously Charles! Our boy is LOADED and that’s exactly how he’d spoil his girl.”

Luca nods in agreement, a dreamy expression on his face. “God, can you imagine being with Charles though? Having him call you all those cute pet names and just showering you with love and gifts? I’d fucking die.”

“Yeah, she has to be the luckiest woman on the planet,” Enzo sighs wistfully. “I mean, I’m straight, but even I’d let Charles ruin me, you know what I’m saying?”

The other guys murmur and nod in emphatic agreement, all of them momentarily lost in a fantasy of being Charles Leclerc’s pampered significant other.

“Okay but like, how is this even fair?” Giovanni gripes, breaking the spell. “The rest of us mere mortals are out here busting our asses on Tinder and Hinge, praying a decent girl will swipe right, and Charles just gets to date a literal goddess who is probably a model?”

“Life isn’t fair, Gio,” Enzo says solemnly. “Charles is on a completely different level. He could have any woman he wants and they’d all say yes before he even finished asking. The rules don’t apply to a guy like that.”

Luca suddenly sits up straight, his eyes widening with realization. “Holy shit, guys. Do you know what this means? If Charles is taken, that’s one less F1 driver on the market for all those grid girl groupies to throw themselves at! Maybe the rest of us actually have a chance now!”

Giovanni snorts derisively. “Yeah, you wish. Those chicks are still gonna be busy trying to get with Sainz or Verstappen or Norris. They’re not gonna settle for some nobody Ferrari fan. Let’s be real.”

“Wow, way to kill the vibe, Debbie Downer,” Luca mutters. He turns back to the computer and hits replay on the video, watching enviously as the TikToker clearly shows the €10,000 bank transfer on your phone. “Seriously though, how is this chick not freaking the fuck out? If Charles Leclerc randomly sent me 10 grand I’d be screaming and probably pass out.”

“She’s probably used to it,” Enzo says with a shrug. “I bet this is like, a regular Tuesday for her. Just casually strolling around Monaco, stopping into designer stores whenever she feels like it, Charles’ black credit card weighing down her Hermès purse. The bougiest of WAG lives.”

“God, what I wouldn’t give to trade places with her for just one day,” Giovanni says longingly. “Can you imagine getting to wake up next to Charles every morning? Having him make you breakfast and give you forehead kisses and tell you how much he loves you in that sexy accent?”

“Okay, now you’re just torturing yourself, bro,” Luca laughs. “You’ll be lucky if you can get a Tinder match to agree to split the bill at McDonalds.”

“Why you gotta bring me back to my sad reality like that?” Giovanni groans, chucking a throw pillow at Luca’s head. “Let me live vicariously through Charles’ bougie mystery girlfriend for a little while longer, damn.”

Enzo sighs and leans back in his chair, hands behind his head. “You know what the craziest part of all this is? The fact that Charles managed to keep a whole ass girlfriend hidden from the world. Like, the media has been speculating about his love life forever and no one had a clue he was actually in a serious relationship. That man moves in silence like a ninja.”

“Yeah, and did you see how he just casually threw out that he loves her?” Luca gushes. “He was all I love spoiling you, you deserve the world. My dude is head over heels for this girl and I am LIVING for it.”

“Ugh, why can’t I find a man like that?” Giovanni whines dramatically. “All I want is a guy who will write me cute Instagram captions in three languages and buy out the Gucci store for me but I guess that’s too much to ask!”

“Maybe if you stanned Charles harder, the universe would reward you,” Enzo snarks. “Start leaving thirsty comments on his shirtless pics, see if that manifests your dream F1 boyfriend.”

“Bold of you to assume I don’t already do that,” Giovanni retorts with a smirk. “How else do you think Oscar Piastri ended up in my DMs last night?”

“Wait, WHAT?” Luca and Enzo exclaim in unison, whipping their heads around to gape at their friend.

Giovanni bursts out laughing at their shocked faces. “I’m just kidding, jeez! You think I’d be sitting here listening to you losers if Oscar freaking Piastri actually messaged me? Puh-lease.”

“Man, don’t even joke about that,” Enzo grumbles, clutching at his heart. “You really had me going there for a sec.”

Luca huffs and slouches down in his seat. “Can we get back to being jealous of Charles’ sugar baby girlfriend now? I was enjoying that more than whatever the hell this conversation turned into.”

“She’s not his sugar baby!” Enzo argues. “They’re clearly in love! Did we watch the same video? The way he talked to her was mad cute. That’s his GIRL girl.”

“You’re right, you’re right,” Luca concedes, holding his hands up in apology. “Charles might spoil her but he obviously adores her for more than just her looks. That’s the real relationship goals right there.”

“Imagine being so secure in your love that you can just ball out on your partner like that and know it’s only going to make them love you more,” Giovanni muses. “Cannot relate.”

Enzo nods sagely. “Charles is just built different, man. In more ways than one.”

“Truer words have never been spoken,” Luca agrees. “So, are we watching this video another 50 times or are we moving on to the Grill the Grid compilation I found of all of Charles’ most adorably flustered moments?”

Enzo grins maniacally and reaches for the mouse. “Oh, you know we’re watching the hell out of this absolute gift again. And then we’re gonna spend the next three hours cyberstalking Charles and seeing if we can find any other crumbs about who this legendary mystery woman is. For research purposes.”

“This is the most productive thing we’ve done in months and I’m not even ashamed,” Giovanni declares, cracking his knuckles in preparation for the intense social media deep dive they’re about to undertake.

***

In a crowded sports bar in Dublin, a group of die-hard Ferrari fans gather to watch the latest race. But today, there’s another bit of F1-related content that has their attention. They huddle around a phone, repeatedly watching the now-infamous TikTok video.

“Can you believe it? €10,000 just like that!” Exclaims James, a tall, lanky guy with a mop of curly hair. “I mean, I knew Charles was loaded but damn ...”

“Forget the money, did you see his girlfriend?” Tom, a stocky redhead, chimes in. “Absolutely stunning. Like, how does a race car driver land a girl like that?”

Mark, a quieter guy with glasses, rolls his eyes. “Uh, maybe because he’s Charles freaking Leclerc? The man’s a beast on the track and has the face of a Greek god. Girls probably throw themselves at him left and right.”

The guys all mutter in begrudging agreement, a note of envy coloring their voices. On screen, the video replays yet again, showing you confidently calling up your boyfriend and securing the small fortune without batting an eye.

“God, what I wouldn’t give to have a woman look at me the way she probably looks at Leclerc,” Tom sighs wistfully.

“In your dreams, mate,” James scoffs. “Girls like that are way out of our league. We can’t compete with a Ferrari paycheck and Monaco real estate.”

“Still doesn’t seem fair though,” grumbles Mark. “The dude’s already got it all — talent, fame, money. Leave some for the rest of us!”

On screen, the video reaches the part where you coolly inform the gobsmacked TikToker that you don’t need his measly €2,000 and he should donate it to an animal shelter instead. The guys let out low whistles, clearly impressed by your classy move.

“See, that right there, that’s what separates the Monegasque princess types from regular girls,” says James with an air of authority. “We would’ve taken the cash in a heartbeat.”

“Speak for yourself, I’m a man of principle,” Tom jokes, puffing out his chest exaggeratedly. The others snort and shove him playfully.

As the video ends, the guys sit back, each lost in their own wistful imaginings of what it must be like to be Charles Leclerc. To have the money, success, and effortless charm to win over a girl like you.

Mark is the first to break the contemplative silence. “Maybe we’re looking at this all wrong,” he muses thoughtfully. “I mean yeah, Charles is a lucky bastard, no doubt. But that girl, she seems like a real catch too. Like the kind of person who’d keep you humble and grounded, even when you’re a superstar athlete with the world at your feet.”

The others consider this, nodding slowly. “Fair point,” concedes Tom. “Behind every great man and all that jazz. Leclerc may have his millions but he still needs someone to call him out on his BS from time to time.”

“Exactly,” agrees Mark. “And did you hear the way he spoke to her on the phone? The dude’s completely smitten. He may have all the money and fame, but I bet she’s the real prize in his eyes.”

“Alright, alright, settle down Dr. Phil,” James interjects with a good-natured eye roll. “You gonna start writing romance novels in your spare time now? Maybe they’ll make a movie — The Tifosi Who Loved Me: A Charles Leclerc Story.”

The guys all crack up laughing at that, the tension broken. Their envy towards Leclerc’s charmed life remains, but it’s now tinged with a newfound respect and even a touch of empathy.

“Y’know, jokes aside, I do hope he realizes how lucky he is to have her and treats her right,” Mark says sincerely as their chuckles subside. “A love like that seems rare these days.”

Tom reaches over to clap Mark on the shoulder. “No worries, mate. Did you see the dopey grin on Charles’ face in those paparazzi pics of them together that came out earlier? That man is whipped with a capital W. He knows he’s got a keeper.”

“As he should,” nods James sagely. “Behind every great Ferrari champion is an even greater woman keeping his ego in check. Tale as old as time.”

On that note, the guys clink their pint glasses together, silently saluting the unnamed woman who stole the heart of Charles Leclerc and the envious admiration of Formula 1 fans worldwide. The mystery girlfriend with impeccable style and a heart of gold.

As the pre-race coverage starts up on the bar TV, the guys settle in to cheer on their favorite driver, their fleeting jealousy replaced by the camaraderie and excitement of race day. But in the back of their minds, a single wistful thought remains — what they wouldn’t give to find a love like Charles and his girl seem to share. Guess that’s just one more thing to add to the list of reasons to idolize Charles Leclerc.

***

Among the hordes of viewers obsessively replaying the clip are three best friends gathered for a girls night at a posh Parisian penthouse. Colette, the willowy blonde draped across a velvet chaise lounge, takes a sip of her champagne and shakes her head in wonder.

“God, can you imagine having a boyfriend who just casually drops 10k on you like it’s nothing? Talk about relationship goals,” she sighs dreamily.

Next to her, Nadia snorts derisively while scrolling through Instagram on her phone. “Oh please, like that’s hard to find. I bet loads of rich guys would do that for their girlfriends. It’s not that impressive.”

From her perch on a tufted ottoman, Stephanie raises a skeptical eyebrow. “Really? You think Liam would send you that kind of cash without batting an eye? Mr. I-Need-To-Check-With-My-Financial-Advisor-Before-I-Buy-A-New-Tie?”

Colette erupts into giggles at the scathing impression of Nadia’s banker boyfriend. Even Nadia cracks a reluctant smile before tossing her sleek dark hair.

“Whatever. I’m just saying, that TikTok chick’s boyfriend can’t be THAT special. I’m sure if we did the same challenge our boyfriends would come through too,” she declares with more than a hint of competitiveness in her voice.

“Oooh yes, let’s do it! Let’s recreate the video and see what happens!” Colette squeals, bouncing up and down on the chaise with excitement.

Stephanie, ever the voice of reason, looks uncertain. “I don’t know, guys ... isn’t it a bit tacky to demand money from them like that? What if they get mad?”

Nadia rolls her eyes. “Oh come on Steph, live a little! It’s just a silly experiment. Where’s your sense of adventure?”

“Okay, okay fine,” Stephanie relents, unable to resist her friends’ cajoling. “But I’m blaming you both if Omer breaks up with me over this!”

“Deal!” Colette grins impishly as she grabs her phone. “I’ll go first — let me call Henry and we’ll see if he’s as generous as Mystery Monaco Man.”

With a deep breath, she dials her property developer boyfriend and launches into her rehearsed plea as soon as he picks up. “Baby!” She whines. “You’ll never believe what happened. I’m out with the girls and my Louboutins broke! Like the heel just totally snapped off. I’m absolutely gutted, these were my faves. Is there any way you could send some money to my account so I can grab a new pair on the way home? Pleeeaaase, I’ll love you forever!”

There’s a heavy pause before Henry’s clipped voice comes through, tinged with annoyance. “Christ, again with the bloody shoes? What is it with you women and wasting my hard earned money on bits of leather you don’t need? Can’t you just take the broken ones to get fixed?”

Colette’s perfectly glossed pout trembles, her blue eyes shining with disappointed tears as Nadia and Stephanie look on in pity. “Never mind,” she mumbles. “Forget I asked. Chat later.” She hangs up and flings her phone down despondently.

“What an ass,” Nadia spits. “You deserve so much better.” Colette shrugs sadly but rallies as she turns to Stephanie expectantly.

“Okay Steph, your turn to give Omer a ring! Let’s hope he restores our faith in rich boyfriends everywhere.”

Stephanie grimaces but dutifully calls her Qatar-based hedge fund manager beau. In her most saccharine voice, she makes her case. “Habibi, you know that gorgeous YSL bag I showed you last week? It finally came back in stock but only for today! Could you maybe pop some cash in my account so I can treat myself? I’ve been working so hard lately and-”

“Wallahi Stephanie, how many handbags does one woman need?” Omer cuts her off irritably. “If I buy you this one, I don’t want to hear any more whining for designer things for at least 6 months, got it? I’ll send you 500 euros, that should more than cover it.”

“Oh. Right. Thanks, I guess ...” Stephanie replies glumly before ending the call. She shakes her head at her friends. “Well, it’s something at least?”

“Hardly,” Nadia scoffs. “These men, I swear. Okay, time for me to show you girls how it’s done. Watch and learn, ladies.”

With a confident smirk, she video calls Liam who answers distractedly, clearly still at the office despite the late hour. “This better be important Nadia, I’m right in the middle of-”

“Liam. Focus,” Nadia cuts him off crisply. “I need you to send €10,000 to my account right now. No questions asked.” She arches a commanding eyebrow, daring him to argue.

Liam just blinks at her for a moment before letting out an incredulous laugh. “I’m sorry, you need me to do what now? 10 grand, are you mad? For what possible reason?”

“To prove you love me,” Nadia retorts smugly. “I saw this thing on TikTok, some girl’s boyfriend sent her-”

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” Liam interrupts. “I’m not one of your little social media playthings to manipulate for views, Nadia. My money is not a toy. I’ll buy you a thoughtful gift for your birthday next month, but I’m not in the business of flinging cash at you for no reason. Now if you’ll excuse me, some of us have real work to do. Goodnight.”

With that he abruptly ends the call, leaving Nadia staring at the blank screen, a red flush of embarrassment and anger creeping up her elegant neck. Stephanie and Colette exchange knowing looks.

“So … that went well,” Stephanie quips sarcastically.

Colette sighs morosely as she flops back onto the chaise, hugging a silk pillow. “Maybe that girl’s boyfriend really is one of a kind. God, I bet she feels like the luckiest woman alive. Can you even imagine being THAT loved and adored?”

Nadia seems to deflate, her bravado evaporating. “No,” she whispers. “I can’t. You’re right, Col. Mystery Monaco Man is clearly in a league of his own. I bet he makes her feel like an absolute queen every damn day.”

Stephanie nods thoughtfully, twirling a lock of hair. “You know what though? Good for her. She seems lovely and down-to-earth in the video. If anyone deserves that fairy tale romance, it’s a girl like that who doesn’t even realize how special it is.”

“Ugh, so true. god I’m depressed now,” Colette groans, reaching for the champagne bottle to refill her glass. “To Mystery Monaco Man — may he set the standard for rich boyfriends everywhere. And to the girl who’s lucky enough to love him — may she live happily ever after and never take a single moment for granted.”

“Hear, hear,” Nadia and Stephanie chorus, clinking their glasses against Colette’s.

As the bubbles fizz on their tongues, the wistful faraway looks in their eyes betray the same thought — what they wouldn’t give to trade places with you for just a day, to know what it feels like to be cherished so completely by a man like Charles. To them, you’re living the ultimate dream.

If only they knew the best part isn’t the extravagant gestures or lavish gifts.

It’s the little moments. The soft kisses pressed to your temple. The fingers intertwined with yours. The sleepy smiles over morning coffee. The shared laughter and inside jokes. The unwavering support and unconditional acceptance. The bone-deep feeling of safety and coming home.

That’s the real fairy tale. And no amount of money could ever buy it.

***

Back in Monaco, Lando Norris slouches comfortably in his gaming chair, eyes glued to the triple monitors in front of him. He’s meant to be reviewing telemetry data in preparation for the upcoming race weekend, but the notification chime from his phone proves far too tempting. Lando picks up the device, fully intending to only glance at it for a second before dutifully returning to his work.

But then he sees it — the TikTok that at least a dozen people have sent to him in the past hour alone. Curiosity piqued, Lando clicks on the video and watches intently, his brows steadily rising towards his hairline with each passing second.

“Wait, is that ...” he mutters to himself as the clip plays out. When your boyfriend’s voice comes through the speakers, Lando’s eyes bug out comically. “Holy shit, it is Charles! And Y/N!”

A knock on the door makes Lando jump slightly. Before he can respond, a familiar mop of tousled chestnut hair pokes into the room. “Hey mate, did you see-” Max Verstappen starts to say.

“The TikTok of Charles simping hard for Y/N? Yup, watching it right now,” Lando finishes for him, eyes still glued to his phone screen in fascination.

Max invites himself into the room fully and flops down on the couch. “Absolutely crazy, right? Who just casually sends their girlfriend 10k for a random pair of shoes?”

Lando snorts. “Certainly not you, you stingy Dutchman,” he ribs playfully. Max chucks a throw pillow at him in retaliation.

“Hey, even I splurge on my girlfriend sometimes!” Max protests. “I just bought her ... erm ...” He racks his brain trying to remember the last lavish gift he purchased unprompted.

“A six-pack of Sugar Free Red Bull last week?” Lando supplies dryly.

“... Shut up.”

The two dissolve into snickers before turning their attention back to the TikTok, which has now looped to the beginning again.

“Charles is so whipped for Y/N,” Max observes, shaking his head in amused disbelief. “He’s just asking to get taken advantage of, throwing money around like that.”

“I think it’s kinda sweet,” Lando admits with a shrug. “He just wants to make her happy. Don’t act like you wouldn’t do the same if your girl asked!”

Max scoffs. “What, fall victim to a gold digger? No thanks mate.”

“Y/N’s hardly a gold digger and you know it,” Lando chides. “She works hard for her own money and buys plenty of expensive gifts for Charles too. They just like spoiling each other ‘cause they’re in luuurve.” He draws out the last word in a silly voice, making dramatic kissy faces.

“Yeah, yeah, true love and all that sappy bullshit,” Max says dismissively, though there’s no real heat behind it. “I’m just saying, no way in hell I’m sending 10k on command for a pair of fucking shoes!”

Lando hums thoughtfully. “I would.”

Max’s head whips around to stare at him incredulously. “You what.”

“If it was the right girl? Sure, I’d do it,” Lando says nonchalantly. “Maybe not for something frivolous like shoes, but if my girlfriend called me up and said she needed 10k transferred ASAP? I’d do it, no questions asked. You gotta have that level of trust.”

Clearly torn between wanting to take the piss out of his friend and feeling a reluctant sort of respect, Max just grunts noncommittally in response before turning back to rewatch the clip once more.

Debate rages online among the fans about the cute interaction. Most find the whole thing adorably romantic, cooing over what a doting and generous boyfriend Charles is. They swoon at the obvious love and care between you two, speculating excitedly in the comments about when Charles might pop the question.

Others are more cynical, rolling their eyes at Charles “simping” so hard and accusing you of only dating the Ferrari driver for his money. However, these naysayers are quickly drowned out and ratio’d by your legions of adoring supporters.

Through it all, you and Charles pay the speculation little mind, blissfully wrapped up in your fairytale romance.

Charles returns home that evening to the mouthwatering aroma of his favorite pesto pasta dish wafting from the kitchen. He grins when he spots you at the stove, swaying your hips to the sultry jazz music playing from the speaker as you stir the sauce. Quietly, he comes up behind you and slips his strong arms around your waist, pressing a kiss to your temple.

“Mmm, smells amazing,” he murmurs appreciatively.

You turn in his embrace and loop your arms around his neck, smiling radiantly up at him. “Welcome home, Cha-Cha,” you greet him, using the silly pet name that never fails to make him chuckle and scrunch his nose adorably. “Dinner’s almost ready.”

“And what’s for dessert?” Charles asks with a playful waggle of his eyebrows.

Biting your lip coyly, you untangle yourself from his arms and saunter off towards the bedroom. “Come find out after we eat. Oh, and I picked up a little something special to express my gratitude for earlier ...” you call over your shoulder with a wink.

Charles’ megawatt grin could power all of Monaco for a year. Viral TikTok or not, the Monegasque knows he’s already the luckiest man in the world to have you as his partner through this crazy ride called life.

No amount of money could ever compare to the joy of being loved by you.

[discordantwritings]

Always Return to You (Shanks x Reader NSFW)

Warnings: Some guys being creepy, gn afab! reader, love confessions, slight exhibitionism (the tavern is closed but yknow), PiV sex, creampie, not beta read

WC: 2.8k

Summary: You and Shanks have been flirting for a while now and you can’t help but wonder if it’s just entertainment for him- or if he has the same feelings that you do.

Note: I mean there’s a reason he’s bagged Buggy and Mihawk. This man has skills. This man has swagger. I hope I captured a sliver of his BDE.

When the Red Haired Pirates rolled into town you always knew you were in for some long nights serving at the local bar. You didn’t mind though, they always tipped well, were significantly nicer than your average pirate, and then, of course, there was the captain.

You never know what to make of Shanks. Logically you know he’s got a huge bounty and a reputation for being one of the strongest pirates in all the seas. But when he rolls into the bar with a lopsided grin and the laugh of a man who doesn’t have a worry you can’t see a terrifying pirate.

His crew and him hang around your bar for a week every few months while they restock in a large port nearby and you can’t help but look forward to when his ship cruises in. You’ve built quite the friendship up with Shanks over the years, finding him easy to get along with and easier to talk to. The two of you have shared stories until the morning hours and despite everything he’s experienced he still cares and pays attention to yours as much as you do his.

And, if you are able to admit just to yourself, you love the flirting. Shanks flirts with everyone, and you’re no exception to his wandering gaze and cheeky words. Even though his affections are not only for you you can’t help but feel special when his eyes travel down your figure. You give it as good as he gives too and Shanks always loves it, but neither of you have ever crossed that line.

He’s a pirate captain. You’re just some server. It’s never going to happen.

But that doesn’t stop the pang of jealousy you feel every time you see him leave the bar with someone else tucked under his arm. You would never do or say anything but deep down you wonder how it feels to have that strong hand on the small of your back or that bright red hair in your fingers while his head was-

“Did ya miss me?” You almost drop a drink when you hear Shank’s voice right next to you.

Looking up you see him leaning on the bar next to you, that stupid lopsided smile on his face. You have to fight down embarrassment that he just caught you in the middle of thoughts about him. Having been brought back to reality you finally notice the rest of his crew taking seats in the tavern, rowdy in a way that makes you feel like you’re having fun as well.

“Do you think I wait around for you to come back?” You don’t look at him, just continue loading drinks onto your tray for the other large party of pirates here.

“Of course not.” He slides a bit closer and helps you balance the final drinks. “Just thinkin’ about how I missed lookin’ at you.”

You shoot him an annoyed look, but there’s no malice behind it. “Yeah, yeah. You say that to everyone.”

“But I mean it with you.” He fires back.

“Keep dreaming.” You say as you walk away to deliver the drinks.

“Always of you baby!” He shouts with a laugh, finally moving back to his crew.

You roll your eyes but can’t help the large grin that comes over your face. Shanks has a way of making the atmosphere lighter and honestly, you needed it tonight.

The Red Haired Pirates weren’t the only group in here tonight- some low level scumbags occupied half of the tavern and you cringed when you turned to deliver their drinks and got greeted with drunken catcalls. But you took a deep breath and pushed all your emotions down as you handed everyone their drinks. At least with Shank’s crew here you know someone will tip well tonight.

Throughout the night you hover around the Red Haired Pirates, seeking the kind reprieve from the more obnoxious guests of the night. Everyone is kind to you and you catch up on the adventures they had while they were away. You don’t pay special attention to Shanks, but you can feel his gaze on you whenever you’re around. The way he looks at you versus the way everyone else does- it’s hard to place what’s different logically but it just is. You feel safe with Shanks, no matter what you know that if you ever seriously said no he would back off, which is not something you’d trust most men to do.

As the night wears on everyone gets drunker and sloppier and the guests start getting worse and worse. It’s becoming exhausting to ignore the hoots and hollers mixed with nasty whispers when you bring the next round of drinks. The Red Haired Pirates have been slowly leaving as the night wore on and not having that buffer was starting to take its toll. Luckily, Shanks was still there.

Despite the amount of drink you know he’s had he’s surprisingly composed as he sits back in the wooden booth. His gaze has something stirring underneath it and you follow his sight line over to the other crew of pirates. Sliding him another drink you decide to question him.

“They a rival crew or something?” You can’t imagine that sloppy group could compare to Shank’s crew, but you weren’t sure what else it could be.

“No.” He doesn’t stop staring. “But if those dirty assholes don’t stop eye-fucking you they are going to regret it.”

Oh.

His words stop your thoughts in your tracks and you can feel your brain having to hard reboot. Your body has no issues though and you can feel arousal pool down in your belly.

“You don’t-“ You stumble over your words as your brain finally catches up. “It’s not a big deal.”

Shanks finally turns his gaze to you and seeing him serious is a strange feeling. “It should be. You want me to deal with them?”

You glance back over at them and then down to your watch. “It’s almost closing anyways. They aren’t worth your time.”

“But you are.” When he says things like that normally he’s usually smiling with a light tilt to his voice but this time he’s deep and sincere. Your heart goes head over heels in your chest.

“I have to- um-“ You point back to the bar where a few patrons are waiting to pay their tabs.

“I’ll stay with you while you close, alright?” His words calm you, no longer having to worry about if any of your more unsavory guests are going to try and hang around after hours. You nod and smile at him before walking back to the bar to finish up your night.

You’re not sure if Shank’s egregious glaring was the reason the final hours of the night went so smooth but you’re certainly not complaining. The rowdy patrons slowly filter out as you start to clean up and Shanks is surprisingly helpful, putting up chairs while you mop the floor. However, thoughts have been gnawing at the back of your head.

Finally having everything cleaned up and ready for tomorrow you and Shanks head for the door but you stop halfway and have to speak up. “Shanks, can I ask you something?”

He stops and turns on his heels, slight concern on his face. “Of course.”

“Do you-“ Embarassment works its way up your neck and you avoid Shank’s gaze. “I just have to know if-“

Shanks is patient with you, not speaking as he walks closer to you.

“Do you actually like me.” You finally manage to spit out. “Because we have this thing and it’s fun but sometimes I wonder if this is how you act with everyone or-“

Your words trail off and there’s silence. After a few moments you work up the courage and look up at Shanks. His bright red hair falls over his face as he seems lost in thought. You don’t notice his arm moving until his hand interlinks in yours.

“I don’t think like is really the word I’d use.” He brings your hand up and presses a kiss to your knuckles. “Love might be more appropriate.”

“You can’t just say things like that.” There’s no hiding your embarrassment now, a blush probably covering every inch of your body.

“Why not?” He uses his hold to pull you in closer, your chest grazing his. “It’s true.”

“And you’re not just going to sail away and leave me here?” You squeeze his hand, searching in his eyes if he’s telling the truth.

“I always come back for you, don’t I? I certainly don’t keep coming back here for the food.” His eyes are shining and he has that signature grin back in his face.

“You’d keep coming back to me?” Your other arm comes up and drapes around his shoulder.

“Nothing could stop me.” There’s a sincerity and strength to his words that has you melting.

His face is so close to your now that he’s taking over your senses. You can smell the beer you’ve been serving him but the strong scent of the sea will probably always linger on him. You move closer, his lips painfully close to yours.

“Are you sure-“ You don’t even finish your question before Shanks has closed the small distance between you.

You’ve imagined what it would like to kiss him countless times but actually kissing him blows all of your fantasies out of the water. Slow but confident movements have you melting into him. His hand releases yours and snakes around to the small of your back, pulling your body flush with his. He doesn’t let up until you’re breathless, pulling away with a gasp.

Shanks rests his forehead against yours patiently giving you time to breathe again. Turning your gaze up you lock eyes with Shanks again and you see a flash of hunger in his gaze before he’s kissing you again. Your knees go weak and you feel the low rumble of Shank’s chuckle as he starts to lead you backwards until you feel the back of your knees connect with a table. Breaking away again you hop up to sit on the table, hands coming up to grab Shanks by the collar of his shirt to pull him in again. His legs go between yours, forcing your thighs apart as he leans over you.

“So.” His mouth comes down to your neck, words spoken in between opened mouthed kisses to the skin there. “You want me to bring you back to my ship now or bring you back to my ship after I’ve fucked you on this table.”

The moan that leaves you is involuntary and you hook your legs around his waist, hoping that answers his question for him. It doesn’t.

“Oh c’mon I want to hear you say it.” He comes back up to look you in the eyes. You try to turn away in embarrassment but his hand comes up and softly redirects your chin back to him.

“I want you to fuck me on this table.” You whisper, catching the way his pupils dilate at your words.

“That’s it sweetheart.” He returns to attacking your neck as your arms come up around his neck.

Using your grip you drag you hips up to his and grind down, moaning when you feel his clothed erection through the layers of fabric. Unable to help himself he ruts his hips into yours, biting down into your neck.

“Eager, aren’t we?” His hand is at the waistband of your pants, slipping under and down to your center. Fingers quickly find your folds and he chuckles when he feels how soaked you are.

“Been thinking about you all night.” You confess, lifting up into his touch.

“Fuck, me too.” He kisses you with a renewed heat and you gasp into his mouth when you feel his fingers push into you.

Taking advantage of that his tongue enters your mouth and you let yourself be swept up in the sensations. Two calloused fingers scissor inside you and you grip Shank’s bright red hair at the base of his neck.

It isn’t long until Shanks is pulling his fingers out and you whine at the loss. You’re about to complain until you see him bring his fingers up to his mouth and lick your slick off.

“Shit you taste good sweetheart.” You moan at his words and the heels of your shoes dig into his back. “Should I get a better taste now or later?”

Damn him and his choices. “Later- I need you inside me.”

You both break away for a few moments to fumble with your pants and you kick yours off fast, the wood cold against your bare ass. When Shanks’ pants come down you can’t help but stare. He’s big and while you are slightly afraid he’s not going to fit you would be lying if you weren’t up for the challenge.

Shanks seems equally captivated by you, his hand pushing your thighs apart so he can get a better look. “I could feel you were soaked but damn, all this for me baby?”

“Just for you.” Those words seemed to be exactly what Shanks wanted to hear because he wastes no more time.

Gripping himself he drags the tip of his cock through your slick, mixing it with the precum leaking out of him. He slaps his tip onto your clit and your hands shoot out to his shoulders to stead yourself.

“Stop being such a tease.” You huff.

“Oh c’mon you know you love it.” But he relinquishes to you, lining himself up with your entrance.

Even just the push of his tip into you stretches you and you take deep breaths as he slowly sinks further into you. The stretch rides the line between pain and pleasure and you claw at Shanks’ back.

“You’re doing so good for me baby. Taking me so well.” He whispers in you ear, soothing you as you adjust to his size.

It takes you a bit for the pain to completely fade into pleasure as he sits in you as far as he can go. When you’re finally ready for him to move again you nod, and Shanks begins to move. His pace is slow and you feel every inch of him drag in and out of you.

“Fuck baby you’re so tight.” His head is pressed against your shoulder as he uses all of his self control to go slow with you.

“I just think-“ You cut yourself off with a moan as he bottoms out again. “That you’re just fucking big.”

Shanks laughs. “Two things can be true.”

You can’t stop the smile that comes over your face. His sense of humor was infectious like that. Your laughs turn into a moan as he picks up the pace, and you can’t help but feel like you’re being split in half. Your fingers dig into his shoulders as he pulls you in for more deep kisses.

The slow build of your orgasm comes creeping up on you, your walls clenching around Shanks. You know he feels it because he stops kissing you to let out a deep groan as his thrusts stutter. It doesn’t take him long to recover though and when he trusts into you again it’s faster and deeper than before. His hand comes down between the two of you and his skilled fingers work your clit while he whispers in your ear.

“Need you to cum on my cock baby. Want you to remember this every time you work. Can you do that? Cum all over this table for me baby?” His filthy words and fast movements send you spiraling and it’s not long before you’re cuming with a scream.

Shanks isn’t too far behind you. “Where-“

You don’t need him to finish his sentence and you use the remaining strength in your legs to lock his hips to yours. He cums deep inside you with a shudder and you’ve never felt so full.

The two of you sit there intertwined as you both come down from your orgasms, heavy breaths the only noise in the room. When he finally pulls out you can feel his cum begin to leak out of you and you have to admit you love the feeling.

“I’ll be right back.” Shanks kisses your forehead as he walks away for a moment but comes back with a damp rag to clean you and the table up.

“So.” You link your arms around his neck. “I think you might have to carry me back to your ship.”

That lopsided grin is back on his face. “Baby if it were up to me I’d carry you everywhere.”

“So romantic.”

“Anything for the person I love.” He grabs your hand again, kissing your knuckles.

You know life will be hard with a partner who’s a notorious pirate, but you know your heart is his and you wouldn’t want it any other way.

[alphajocklover]

You know, you just talked about that "Big Dick Energy" thing, but I must admit, I have follow-up questions.

Under which terms that "accumulation" of "masculine enregy" happens, and for whom ? 'Cause you see, I'm a male-leaning non-binary guy, so it means that I qualify close to "man", yet disavows most masculine acts. Am I at risk of a "Big Dick Energy" explosion, or is my gender identity a sufficient deterrent (if true, it would open up a whole lot of other questions) ?

I'm sorry to go all science-y on you for a silly Tumblr post, but I need to know if I could be affected !

I should have known bringing up BDG would lead to some more questions. It’s a confusing, and honestly strange phenomenon I don’t know everything about. But I’ll do my best to explain it to you.

Everyone in the world has two special energies that are inside them. Not one, two. See, just as there is a masculine energy, there is also a feminine energy. There’s even some argument that there’s an androgynous energy but people can’t quite seem to agree on that. What we know for sure is that everyone has both masculine and feminine energy, even the manliest man and the girliest girl. The difference is how much of said energy someone produces. A very manly man makes little feminine energy and lots of masculine energy, and a girly girl does the opposite. Some people, like you, make fairly equal amounts of both, which makes you something that’s not one or the other.

Now, this energy accumulates when someone who naturally makes enough of this energy doesn’t expel it. BDG energy is expelled by doing something masculine. Usually a person naturally does this, since as the energy builds up a person has a natural urge to do such things. But when someone has these urges yet ignores them for whatever reason? That’s when the build up really begins to change someone.

You probably won’t end up like the guy from our last post. Being non-binary you probably make about equal amounts of masculine and feminine energy and use those energies enough throughout your daily life. But… you may still want to be careful. See, masculine and feminine energies can be… transferred between people. It’s sort of like how some people donate blood. Some people can donate masculine or feminine energy to another person. They usually need some training and an immense amount of built up energy to do so, but it is possible to do it, and I’ve recently heard of a few groups doing so by force, using energy to convert people to their cause.

So be careful out there. And maybe avoid any particular manly group of men for a while, or they may make you join them

**hey guys, didn’t expect to be posting about BDE again so soon but I can never turn down an interesting post idea. I’ve got a lot of different transformation methods now don’t I? Maybe one day I’ll figure out how they all fit together. Hope you enjoy!**

[moni-logues]

BDE

Pairing: Chan x gn.reader

Genre: pwp/smut but it's a little fluffy, established relationship

Summary: Chan tries to insist he has BDE when all he really has is a BD.

Word count: 2.1k

Content: Chan has a Big Dick, oral sex (m. receiving inc deep throat and choking), sexual activity in public toilets (but no one is around)

A/N: this started with, who else?, @minttangerines. I honestly don't even remember how the conversation started but then we were talking about a fic about Chan's Big Dick struggles lmao and this idea was born. That was weeks ago now and she finally wrote it. Thank you to Lia @quarter-life-crisis2 for reading this so late at night to reassure me it didn't suck balls.

*

“I don’t know about these, y’know...” 

“Well, I told you, didn’t I? You should have sized up!” 

“But I always get this size!” 

“And they’ve changed their sizing! I told you! And you didn’t listen so now you have to suffer.” 

You turned away from Chan and back to the mirror while he fussed, trying to adjust himself comfortably in his new boxer briefs that were, quite clearly, a little snug.  

“I don’t know if I can wear these,” Chan groaned, sitting heavily on the bed with his trousers unzipped.  

“You don’t own that suit; you cannot go commando. And I’m not letting you wear any of mine.” 

Chan groaned again, loudly aggrieved, and lay back on the bed.  

“Can’t believe I’m being hoisted by my own petard! Too much big dick energy!” he cried and you turned to deliver a withering look. 

“My darling, I am not sure you know what any of those words mean. You do not have BDE.” 

He was back upright in a flash. 

“What?! How can you say that?! We are literally having a conversation about how I don’t fit in my fucking pants right now.” 

“Having a big dick is not the same as having big dick energy?” You did not, before this moment, realise that your boyfriend was quite this stupid. It gave you second thoughts about the entire relationship.  

“It’s in the name? BIG DICK energy.” 

You gestured wildly, looking around the room as if there were anyone else there who could back you up. 

“Big Dick Energy. You might have a big dick-” 

“-I do, thank you ver-” 

“YES, fine! You do have a big dick, but that is not all that’s required. And I will neither accept nor tolerate your saying that it is.” 

“Putting me down in my time of strife. What a loveless relationship we have.” 

You give him an exaggerated wink and turned back to the mirror once more to apply your lipstick. 

* 

With no solution to his problem, Chan had no choice but to zip himself up, make himself presentable, and pray to the gods that the circulation to his dick wouldn’t get cut off. There are some losses no mere mortal could survive. 

“Stop fidgeting!” you hissed to him as he squirmed on the red carpet next to you.  

It was bright and overwhelming and you were reminded why you so infrequently accompanied him to these events. This time, though, he had been nominated for an award so you wouldn’t have dreamt of missing it. The camera flashes made your eyes hurt and the cacophony of paparazzi calls blurred into a singular, uninterpretable noise; it was like entering a completely inhuman world, where you were devoid of your usual senses, disoriented, out of place, and, were it not for Chan, completely untethered.  

This time, you were also distracted by his wriggling. 

“I can’t help it!” he hissed back. “I’m losing circulation down there, I swear!” 

“You’ll lose more than that if you keep touching your fucking dick on a red carpet!” 

He huffed but duly held still for the rest of the photos, shooting off into the toilets as soon as you got into the building.  

* 

He was uncomfortable. He could barely keep his hands away from his crotch. You noticed. You were sure other people also noticed. You were not sure that this was in any way good. You slipped one hand into his and pulled it into your lap. That didn’t stop him. The night was going to be long – already had been long and had so far left to go. You felt as though you were going to have to take things into your own hands. 

Not literally. 

Maybe literally. 

You leant over, your mouth close to his ear. 

“If you can leave yourself alone until the ceremony is over, I’ll make it worth your while,” you whispered, letting your lips just barely touch the hinge of his jaw before sitting back in your seat.  

He didn’t turn to look at you but you saw his Adam’s apple bob and he squeezed your hand tight. His free hand moved to the arm of the seat and stayed there.  

* 

“This counts, right?” he was asking before you were even out of the door. “It’s over?”  

He was pushing you gently, steering you into the nearest dark corner, and then pressing against you, his hands at your waist, his nose in your hair.  

“Have your boxers cut off the circulation to your brain, Chan?” You pushed him, a little less gently, backwards. “We are still in public! You really want me to suck you off right here?” You were whispering, eyes flicking beyond Chan’s head as more and more people filed out of the auditorium on their way to bars, after parties, bathrooms. 

“Honestly?” he asked, eyebrows raised, saying ‘yes’ without actually saying it.  

“I am not breaking public indecency laws for you.” 

“I’d do it for you!” 

“Oh, you’d go down on me here, would you?” 

He was genuinely lowering to his knees before you had finished the sentence and you scrambled to haul him to his feet, your face burning hot with embarrassment. 

“You’re incorrigible!”  

“No, baby, I am fucking desperate. Desperate to get these piece of shit boxers off me and your mouth on me.” 

You had promised him. So you wandered, as inconspicuously as possible, around to the other side of the building, to find some toilets that weren’t so busy. Rather, you were hoping for some that were empty.  

And you were in luck.  

“Shit, it’s my lucky night!” Chan whispered as you pushed open the last stall door, confirming that they were all empty.  

“Honey, you didn’t win the award and your underwear is slowly strangling your dick. What about that is lucky?” 

“First of all, rude. Second of all, in about one minute, I won’t even be able to remember my own name, let alone all that other stuff. Stop using your mouth to be smart and let me choke you.” 

You rolled your eyes and sank to your knees as he eliminated the space between you. He hesitated as he unzipped, then rolled his own eyes, stooping to kick off his shoes, take off his trousers and stretch, roll, and pull the offending underwear off, muttering all the while about how stupid they were and how much he hated them and the strongly worded email he’d be writing. Then he stood, naked from the waist down.  

“Oh yeah, you’re all BDE now. Y’know, Winnie the Pooh, he really fucks.”  

When Chan looked at you, you expected him to laugh or smirk or hell, roll his eyes back at you, but he didn’t. He just looked down with that dark intensity in his face, the one that said he wasn’t going to take it easy on you. He gestured with two fingers for you to come closer and you shuffled awkwardly on your knees. Then he traced your face with a featherlight touch. You reached your own hand up and used the same lightness as you ran your finger down his length.  

As his fingertips reached your jaw, he held you, his fingers starting to press, harder and harder as you opened your mouth wider. He ran a thumb over your bottom lip as he sank his teeth into his own. You stuck your tongue out to lick at his thumb as it passed and he nodded at you.  

He held you like that, mouth open, tongue out, looking up at him, as he took himself in his free hand, stiffening quickly, pumping slowly. He made you wait until the pre-cum was dripping from his head, until he was quietly huffing little satisfied groans, until you were shifting uncomfortably on your knees, your legs going numb, your stomach tightening with anticipation, your mouth watering—saliva flooding, making a mess of your clothes when you hadn’t even had a taste of him yet. You knew better than to ask, better than to protest. He’d only make you wait longer. Even though it was him who wanted this, who was ‘desperate’ for it, you knew he wouldn’t hesitate to make this a punishment for you.  

When you thought you would fall over, pass out, fling your hands into the air and grab hold of him, he nudged his hips forward, only the very tip of his dick touching your tongue. You lunged forward, wrapping your lips around him, expecting him to move backwards, to tease some more, to make you show him how patient you could be. 

He didn’t. He really was desperate. He let you take him to the hilt, eyes springing with tears when he hit your throat, those tears making tracks down your cheeks as you swallowed him, as you pushed until your nose hit his skin. 

“That’s right,” he sighed, his head tipping back, his fingers winding in your hair. “You fucking know- shit, you know how to do that right.”  

You did. When you first got together, he had very shyly confessed to you that he’d never come from a blowjob before, because people were intimidated by his size, because he was self-conscious of it, all too aware that it was too much for most. He never felt like he could ask for what he wanted, how he liked it, didn’t want to demand or pressure or make his partners feel uncomfortable. So he’d just  sucked it up and, eventually, gone without. It was ok, he had said with a light shrug; he didn’t really mind; he knew it was a lot. He had said many things that he had convinced himself were true. That he didn’t matter. Not really. That his partners shouldn’t try to make him feel good, that they shouldn’t work together to make all parts of sex a mutually enjoyable experience.  

But you weren’t easily intimidated. You were quickly and easily infatuated and then in love with a man so sweet, he spiked your blood sugar; a man so smart, he raised your IQ; a man so hot, he was targeted by climate change activists. And you were determined to show him what he had been missing. Determined to show him what he was worth. Determined to show him that no big dick was going to get in the way of you getting him all the way off, using just your mouth.  

He whimpered, the pitch of his voice tremulously high now, his dick leaping in your mouth so you gagged, choked a little, made him really feel the tight squeeze of your throat. He was whispering under his breath, swearing quickly, calling to god (as if he could help, as if he could do anything you couldn’t), breathing your name in a way that made you physically ache for him to fill you.  

You had this down to an art. You knew his every twitch and every hitch in his breath, could time, down to the second, when he was about to finish. Still bobbing up and down, drooling along his rigid length, you took his balls in one hand and squeezed, slowly and evenly, pressing and rubbing on his taint with the other. You felt the full-body shudder go through him and the gasp which always accompanied his release. You took it all, every drop, every time. 

Chan stood, his hands fallen from your hair, limp at his sides, his eyes closed, mouth open, breathing gradually evening out. You sat back and watched him. 

“I can’t believe I have to put those fucking boxers back on,” he said when his feet touched back down to earth.  

You laughed.  

“Don’t make me say ‘I told you so’ again.” 

You stumbled as you rose to your feet, your legs fizzing back to life and making you unsteady. Chan held you securely. 

“You know I like you a lot more with my dick in your mouth?” 

But he was smiling, dreamy-eyed, putting his warm, solid hands on your waist and pulling you in for a kiss. It was more than you had expected: not a peck, his lips firm against yours, opening slightly, the pressure as he sucked at your bottom lip making your knees go weak again. You smiled at him when he pulled back, dazed, a haze of love and lust swirling around you. 

You hummed lightly. 

“Well, if you’re a really good boy for the rest of the night, I’ll put it back there when we get home.” 

He grinned, smirked actually, and gave you another quick kiss. 

“Can’t resist my big dick energy, right?” 

Your face fell as his lifted into a shit-eating grin. You walked away, out of the toilets, leaving him scrambling to re-dress himself and come after you.  

[ameliora-j]

Aaron Hotchner finally took a page outta Rossi's book and got with a black woman and his life was forever changed. He always felt like there was something missing, something he couldn't quite put his finger on. He talked to Rossi about it one day and he told him that he'd been in his shoes before meeting his second wife. Hotch took it with a grain of salt before a chance encounter had him revisiting the conversation. Everything was different for him from the first conversation and she made everything better for him. Vibes? Leveled up. Music taste? Leveled up. Casual styles? Leveled up. He already had BDE before her, but she took him to a whole new level and he worships the ground she walks on. He dotes on her and is super soft with her, but when it's time to do it (😏) he's rough, but gentle. He's slutted her out a few times though, she didn't know how big of a freak he was until they finally got super comfortable in their sexual relationship. Long story short, he's a whore, but only for his princess 🥰 (sorry that was so long lol)

DO NOT EVER BE SORRY I’VE BEEN FUCKING WAITING FOR THIS ONE

content: spicy (no smut but suggestive), mainly fluff though!!

he’s so so respectful and he honestly didn’t think much would come of it when rossi set him up with you. the both of you went into this blind date thinking that maybe you’d have a new friend or perhaps a hookup but not much else. but the second that aaron hotchner laid eyes on you, he was a goner. you were the most beautiful woman he’d ever set his eyes upon.

he couldn’t help but stare at your lips as you spoke, and he was completely enamored with every single one of your features. he makes sure to tell you that every chance he gets, too. he loves to learn new things about your culture and what all the slang means. you giggle everytime you use an aave term and he gives you a clueless little “what’s that mean?”

he pays for your hair!! sugar daddy!hotch is my favorite hotch! all he asks is that you send him 3 options to choose from and he sends you the money for it. and then when you come home, he greets you with a gentle “can i touch it…?”

teaching him your wash day routine and eventually he becomes so well versed in it that you let him do it when you’re too tired or to lazy too. eventually he starts memorizing how long you go in between wash days and asking if he can do it for you and it quickly becomes his favorite time to spend with you.

helps you take down all of your protective styles and is just so so gentle with it. when you’re cuddling and you’re head is on his chest, you constantly worry that your hair is in his way (when it’s out natural). always self consciously saying “i’m sorry, i know my hair gets in the way and trying to smooth it down.”

he just shushes you and gently grabs your wrist muttering “stop that, it’s beautiful” as he kisses your hair.

THE BDE AND THE STYLE CHANGE ABSOLUTELY. aaron is already a dilf there’s no question. but once you start dating him? he ditches the t-shirts and polos, you get him a nice silver chain that he constantly has on and help him up his shoe game. you have millions and millions of matching pairs of sneakers (paid for by his credit card ofc bc he’ll be damned if he lets you spend a single cent on absolutely anything).

you are first and foremost a strong independent black woman who doesn’t need a man, and aaron absolutely respects that,, but when you’re with him? you’re a spoiled princess and he won’t hear anything else. he’s literally the only one that can both tolerate and fix your attitude.

say you’re used to toxic relationships and arguments, so immediately in a disagreement you start with the push back and the yelling and the attitude. aaron let’s you rant and vent and scream at him and then j looks at you with a raised brow and asks “are you done? cus i’m prepared to have a conversation and work this out when you are sweetheart.”

or or or or smth petty like you’re j annoyed with the whole day and you snap at him? within seconds he squeezing your jaw and glaring down at you asking “who the fuck do you think you’re talking to like that?” you lose the confidence quick as you squeak put a quick apology.

rossi starts to notice the changes in aaron. in his attitude, his style, the way he carries himself. rossi just leans over to him and chuckles out an ‘i told you so.’

aaron makes a mental note to thank david as the two of you are laid in bed, he’s putting your hair up into your bonnet and dragging you to his chest to watch a movie—jack snuggling up between you guys when he finishes up getting ready for bedtime.

aaron hotchner belongs to the black women if you think otherwise smd

[beautifulpersonpeach]

BPP, a straightforward person like you deserves a straightforward question.

No matter what you do with them afterwards, who would be the best in bed? That is, the one who would make YOU feel the best in bed?

***

Now...

I know we're all bored and dreadfully in need of entertainment, but what in the holy devil is this?

Not that I'm upset getting this kind of ask, (assuming you're not the same 'Anon' aka the empty account that's taken to sending me BTS feet pics in the last few weeks), but how can I possibly answer this honestly without incriminating myself?

The only solution I see here is to pull something of a smoke trick - to write in my honest answer surrounded by a bunch of dishonest ones. So Anon, the last thing you'll be getting from me is a straightforward answer, despite your straightforward question. :)

*

First, the honourable mentions:

Taehyung - He seems like the kind of lay you meet at a party, he'd approach first chatting you up for exactly 47 mins talking about nothing in particular but he'd sprinkle in oddly personal questions here and there, making sure to keep your glass always full. Just before you dip (47 mins is a fairly long time for a party chat), he'd ask you over to his place to have drunk, languid, lazy sex. For some people, one night stands allow them to become more uninhibited, more willing to try new things etc, and party drugs of various kinds including alcohol can help facilitate that sometimes. But alcohol-fueled, no strings attached, lazy sex hasn't really been my speed for years, so it's a pass from me.

Seokjin - He has a reputation of having a massive cock but much of what the fandom ascribes as BDE for him just seems to me like the typical air of authority anyone in his position would have given the age hierarchy in Korea. In my experience, big dicked Korean guys are significantly more obnoxious than anything we've seen Jin display, they're also really into fairly unusual kinks, for whatever reason, so since I don't get any of those vibes from Jin, I assume he'd be a decent lay but only that. For my tastes at least.

*

The smoke screen:

Yoongi - Getting the obvious suspect out of the way, I don't think Yoongi has the kind of stamina I'm looking for in a good fuck. Which is kinda tragic for me, as you can imagine. The cerebral connection would be there - a non-negotiable for me - and he seems like the kind to not mind a messy tangle on various surfaces if that's how things play out. But could he last longer than the time it takes to stream The Paradox album by Jacob Banks from top to bottom? I doubt it. But I'd be willing to test my hypothesis if given the opportunity.

Jimin - Now, stamina is not a problem for Jimin. I don't really read fanfic but I'm aware he's mostly taken to be the soft bottom in most pairings, maybe because people perceive him to be delicate and feminine especially during sex. While that could be true and technically isn't a hindrance for me, I suspect his natural undercurrent of intensity is brought to the fore during sex. Which I'd like. And that he's more of an equal opportunity kind of fuck. If you know what I mean. So not exactly a switch, and not exactly fully uninhibited but closer to that than the other guys maybe save Hoseok. He also seems like the sort to care more about the where, why, and how of the fuck, than any of the other guys, which I appreciate. But again, I'd be open to testing my hypothesis.

Namjoon - He's clumsy and can't seem to butter toast without everyone around him being worried for their safety and his, but I'm very certain that man knows how to lay pipe. He's been much too unguarded and explicit about it in the past for me to have any real doubts about his experience. I also suspect he's the sort to seek an emotional and cerebral connection with someone, buttering them up with loads of foreplay (somewhat and maybe adorably clumsily), before going in for the kill. Which I'd like. But out of all the guys, he'd be the first to catch feelings. I also think he's the most likely of the members to potentially lurk on Tumblr so Joon if you're reading this, we're both into trying experiments and my DMs are open so feel free to reach out but only after you've already had your rebound.

Jungkook - I think he's a lot more similar to Namjoon in this way than a lot of people think. I can't really go into detail explaining what I mean because well, no, but if stamina was my only requirement in a good fuck, JK would be the only option here. *insert any 'Seven and Jk is a bunny' joke of your choice here* He has this restlessness in most things he does that I find really sweet actually, and I don't think it will be absent during sex. But he'd temper it with being emotionally present, careful, delicate for the whole affair. I like that he's meaty enough to bite into, there'd be a lot of him to hold on to for dear life if we somehow end up on the wall or on a bridge.

Hoseok - He's the sort of guy who knows exactly what he wants and goes straight for it without taking any detours. I think. Not to say he's rough and callous, though I'm not exactly opposed to that depending on the situation, but I suspect he'd be the most likely to directly ask you about your needs, wants, and limits before bumping uglies. Which I'd like too because fully verbalized consent really is sexy. Afterwards though, I think he'd be a cuddler and the biggest one out of the seven. Which I'd like. But I also like to dabble in various things that I think he'd be hesitant to trying because he's conscious about his maintaining his physical health and 'purity'. Maybe. Not a dealbreaker but, you know. I wonder if this vibe I get from him will change after he's done with his military service though, in which case, again, I'd be open to verifying my assumptions with practical experience.

Lol, anyway, there you go, Anon.

[seokjinsonlyone]

Good morningggg Ari gworl! Now don’t judge me on this and mainly why I’m thinking about this in the am. But like I love your headcanons so I just needed to know 😂

What percent BDE does each member give off???

girlie you don’t even wanna know what be going through my mind in the morning sksksjjd so this is a judgment free zone 🥳 also THANK YOOOUUU now let’s get down to business 😈

yoongi: 613% walks around with it draped over his shoulder like a cape like anyone who’s masculinity is as secure as his gotta have a third leg

joon: 444% think about the fact that we never seen joon naked the rest of them (aside from yoongi) have bared their souls to us like okay we had the occasional nip slip and his biceps make appearances and he’d have to wear a binder in order to hide his tiddies but like we ain’t got the full effect thus far like he’s the only one that got the hoes weak in da knees over thoughts silhouettes freaking words he starts talking about art and the girlies start swooning also look at his feet

[rest]

jin: 212% i’m not even referring to the king condom scandal like this man he just does and says whatever he wants you gotta be hanging to not care as much as seokjin like

the way he ate the tannies up in his investment evaluation like a whole singer said the music industry’s six feet under sjakjdnekwjs if his dick ain’t big his balls sure are huge (i know bc they was chilling on the counter that one time)

tae: 110% he’s just so self assured in his weirdness that you know it’s big like he got a easter island head tissue dispenser and

whatever this is going on and a host of other atrocities and then his affinity toward jazz like he’s in a league of his own and so is his junk

jungkook: 98% i mean… if he doing it every hour every minute every second seven days a week and it ain’t shrivel up and fall off yet gotta be a pretty big package nah mean

jimin: 95% now this is one very domineering man and he really does seem decently hung but even more so he seems like it doesn’t matter what size his dick is he knows how to use it very well like man without a doubt will have you seeing stars and ya know that’s what bde is all about me thinks

hobi: hobi is not a sexual being he’s a little baby cutie pie and he belongs in my pocket HOSEOK on the other hand stands at a solid 75% tbh he got them fboi vibes like the ones that you know get around but at the same time they’re really cool and funny so you don’t dislike them he has that energy where you’re like you think it might be but you’re not sure and you kinda wanna find out J HOPE is at a good 87% like a very diligent ceo type beat tbh but like a benevolent ceo he’s a great boss to work under but can and will crack the whip if necessary especiallywhen he’s in dance teacher mode you just KNOW that he’s packing something serious and JAY has like 1000000% bde he got that MONSTER Schlong like god it’s just bopping around smacking anyone within a 5ft radius BEWARE of jay bc honestly that’s one ride that you may not make it back from 😭😭😭

[evansbby]

Ok hear me out-

The smut with Steve,it was about reader's pleasure🥺🥹💗 I mean Steve could have forced her into her giving him a pussy job let's be fr here but he didn't it was all about her

(Ari literally used/manipulated her and took her virginity the first time they met😭🥲)

Like- this points alot about their personality

Or am I being crazy 🥲

Probably am😇

Steve may be dark but he is literally exuding much more BDE 😵‍💫😵‍💫 here let's be honest 😏😮‍💨🫡🤨

Like Stevie boy is not here to play(he will with readers feeling ik they are both terrible😭😭😭😭😭) but slay/stay

But like- may be I'm just like u

I just show I'm Ari girl but deep down in down bad for Stevie 🥹(in general not ref. to wg)

And I loved the moment wher she calls him Stevie

Omgggg it was so cuteeeeerr🥹💗

I loved the moment btw ari and reader when he was ticking her sooo wholesome 😭

But also-

May favs were with Steve him giving her his jacket 💗💗🥹🥹💗💗💗🥹🥹🥹💗🥹

Him finding her keys for her🥹

Omggg omgggg omggggggg so cuteeeeeeee 😭

I just loved them😤

I ship them💗

I love ur fics I literally read everything u write

Honestly I've also joined ur hate-train for Andy

Bhaahahhahahnbhahhabaha

But honestly if u write a fic about him I'll read that too💗

(I mean I did read ur pete fic)

Awww this is so cute! I really sincerely love your enthusiasm for my writing 🥹🥹🩷🩷

Pleasee choose an anon emoji if you want, so I can save your asks under a tag!

Now to your ask:

I purposely gave Steve more bigger dick energy than Ari in Wicked Games 2, bc I HAD to make sure you as the readers would take him as a serious threat to Ari. Already, WG!Ari was established as this hot cocky jerk guy and visually he is ARI LEVINSON and he’s just a god of a man.

So if I’d introduced “Steve🤓☝️” then nobody would’ve taken him seriously lmao. Therefore, I had to introduce “Steve😮‍💨😏” who is all sexy and mysterious SO PEOPLE WOULD TAKE HIM AS REAL COMPETITION TO ARI and guess what??? I think I did my job a bit too well 😂😭😭

Anyways, I love how you really have faith in Steve being a great guy who cares about reader 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 and you want to believe he’s good but youre also questioning if you’re delulu bahahaha I can’t wait till I post part 3!!!

[bourbon-ontherocks]

hi 👀 306 was last week but I still wanted to address a couple of things… mainly roxane’s last scene, ouch, she deserved a better exit than parroting the writers’ memo on [gros canard]’s failings 😩 c’est faible. feels like they should’ve axed the scene (it was clear enough they’d break up, anyway) and simply confirmed she left with the voicemail about her sister dropping off the keys. (btw--did we know she had a sister before you mentioned that detail in fic, or was it another of your predictions??)

big fan of the attic scene though, and daphné & [gros canard]’s synchronized "gilles 🙄😵" lol. plot-wise, however, I’d like to know who would put multiple acid tablets in a bottle they’re not drinking, because 1) big waste of money for a student population, 2) it’s probably not the most efficient way to take lsd (les résidus au fond de la bouteille !!!), 3) que fait le bde ? shouldn’t they at least pretend to care about safety when there’s a party in the dorms?

and I’ll admit it was kinda fun to see [gros canard] using his ~"just broke up" privileges to dunk on morgane’s relationship history. the guy woke up and chose violence 😭😂😭 ça va qu’elle le prend bien…

bref. that’s all for me on this one!! brb ✌️

Oh hi anon, it's so good to see you back!! 😘

I tend to disagree with you re Roxane's break-up scene, because let's remember that we are obsessed. We can list all of Adam's misdemeanors in the blink of an eye. The casual viewer can't. So this last fact in itself justifies Roxane's monologue reminding us what a terrible boyfriend he's been. And also, even though it all wasn't fresh news for me, I must say I appreciated hearing them all together and I appreciated even more Adam having all of this said to his face. And Roxane's conclusion "Et tu penses que ça fait de toi un type bien" poooooooow elle tire à balles réelles et ça fait du bien !!!! So yea basically I loved that scene because he deserved it. Period. 😂

And yes, Roxane mentioned her sister in 206!!! ("et pour l'anniversaire de ma soeur, tu as pu te libérer ?" while Adam is cursing Morgane for not capping the ketchup bottle) Now did I mention her sister in PQENCEL, well I'm afraid that's another occurrence of Local HPI anon knows my own fic better than I do lol!

(oh wait no, I mentioned her in the 303 fic, didn't I?)

The attic scene was funny-ish, granted, but it's entirely thanks to Gilles' inability to correctly answer multiple-choice questions! Ok full disclaimer, I'm kinda meh about this episode, I don't understand why so many people, cast members included, claim that it's the season's best, but also I must say that for me, the episode is completely doomed because of some infuriating stuff that happens in the finale 😭

Agreed that there's some very generous dealers on this campus, last time I checked open bars didn't include full bottles of LSD, but hey what do I know, my student years are far behind (also BDEs have never been worried about safety, come on 😅)(but this makes me think of the Palmashow's HPI spinoff "BDE" lol I bet it would have made this ep more interesting)

(speaking of the Palmashow parody, Morgane finding the victim's daughter behind the screen that *happened to be here* reminded me so much of fake Morgane finding the killer behind the curtain lol)

"the guy woke up and chose violence 😭😂😭 ça va qu’elle le prend bien…" -> true, perhaps it was a bit harsh to tell her that, but honestly the return of the flirty bickering felt so refreshing!!!! 😍 And I'd dare to think that maybe that's also the reason she takes it well while she has all the reasons to be hurt by him reminding her that she always gets dumped, because he's FINALLY risking a joke at her after all those weeks of silent treatment and closed face and angry looks, my boy is making amends and holding a timid Olive branch and she couldn't be more relieved....

... which makes the three months window proposal absolutely frustrating!!! I *hated* this part (I mean, before I watched the finale and understood what hating an episode's ending really meant lol *crying laughter*), because even though Adam needs some time to heal (understandable), and is a total control freak who shows up early on dates and probably needs to know his schedule six months in advance, this is like peak non-romance. Where's the passion? The spontaneity? I'd have accepted this scene if we'd seen him showing up at Morgane's door barely a week later and telling her that he, in fact, cannot wait, but this... UGH!

My theory is that he wanted to wait long enough to be sure about his feelings for Morgane (which would explain why he's so enthusiastic to date her in the next ep, unless he's that dtf haha), make sure it wasn't a phase or a fantasy due to being stuck in a relationship, and that's probably the only theory I can accept because it's vaguely romantic at least, and also I need to believe that his feelings are real, which is something that tends to be hinted at in 307-308 imo, so there's that consistency at least...

Speaking of consistency!!! I know I'm just hurting myself at this point but I wanted to make a quick check on the timeline... Surprisingly the show actually manages to speak the truth, Timothée did spend 4 months with the team (he arrived in the summer, two months later around September/October - remember that the months were mixed up in 303-304 - he starts dating Morgane for two months, and here we are!). So WHY would they instantly ruin that effort with the most random line this show's ever delivered:

"Et bah moi, je me suis séparée de Ludo il y a neuf mois..."

GIRRRRRRRRL, you spent two months on a couch after your breakup. Then, admitting that 205 to 208 happened in like a week which is in itself a ridiculous assumption, you left the PJ for six months. And here we are, four months later, as dutifully reminded by Timothée. And I didn't even extrapolate here, I just took point blank the elements that the show gave me.

2 + 6 + 4 = TWELVE FUCKING MONTHS BARE MINIMUM. Was it that hard to follow up? Jesus Christ.

And since I'm on the inconsistency chapter, the way TIBER is written on Morgane and Adam's wrists suggests that it's Morgane who was holding the pen because of the letters' orientation, but in this case she wrote on her left wrist. While she's left-handed. Too bad, huh?

Other honorable mentions include:

Adam playing a Columbo bit on the university's dean re the silver scalpel

"C'est doux en fait. On dirait du mouton" -> this one goes straight in the top ten show's best lines 🤣🤣🤣

The LSD trip scene being WAY too sexual, this is pornography 😆

I know it's fleeting and not properly framed, but did you see the only interesting part of that re-doing the house montage in the end? THIS:

No I will not accept any other theory, this is the handprint. I will justify it further with this shot from 304:

While the handprint is not visible, probably due to the light and filming angle, it's the same spot as above, which ties in with where Morgane landed in the dance scene, and also it's interesting to note that she put a little candle in front of it 🕯️🥹

[shuamorollss]

It's the season of love! and you know what that means, time to find yourself a valentine! and who better than one of your beloved mutuals? answer these questions, and the mutual with the most mentions your tumblr valentine:

Mutual that always cheers you up?

Mutual you can always rely on?

Mutual who never misses a post?

Mutual you share the most interests with?

Mutual you were most surprised to become moots with?

Mutual that gives the best advice?

Mutual you have the most in common with?

Mutual who has the best jokes?

Mutual you look up to or admire?

Mutual you'd run away and live in a cottage with?

Mutual you most want to be classmates/friends irl with?

Spouse material mutual?

Mutual with the best personality?

Mutual that never fails to make you laugh?

Mutual with the prettiest theme?

Mutual you'd have a crush on if you knew them irl?

Mutual you absolutely cannot live without?

Mutual you want to get to know better?

omg this is so cute (pretending that i wasn't waiting for this!!)

MUTUAL THE CHEERS YOU UP?

@leaderwon, our conversations are always so random and chaotic and it makes my day!!

MUTUAL THAT YOU CAN ALWAYS RELY ON?

omg @.leaderwon too 😭🙏 had to keep up w my unhinged behavior

MUTUAL WHO NEVER MISSED A POST?

@cutieseo my wifey omg she always likes almost all of my shitposts 🤭🙏 I love her sm always up on seungiepup news!

MUTUAL YOU SHARE THE MOST INTEREST WITH?

omg girly idk I haven't known some of my mutuals that well yet 😭 But I'm gonna say @iichaeyj and @leaderwon

MUTUALS WHO YOU WERE MOST SURPRISED TO BE MOOTS WITH?

@soov @koishua @seungstarss @shoyotime tbh they all radiate major bde and i am baffled to even have them follow me back

MUTUAL THAT GIVES THE BEST ADVICE?

@iichaeyj honestly i don't know why u just seem to be the type to give the best ones

MUTUAL YOU HAVE THE MOST IN COMMON IN?

idk abt this either... but i'll say @saeshiros

MUTUAL WHO HAS THE BEST JOKES?

all up on @saeshiros and @koishua their jokes can still be funny even in the elizabethan era

MUTUAL WHO YOU LOOK UP TO OR ADMIRE?

@peripea/@maiverie and @yunverse. love all of their works

MUTUAL YOU'D RUN AWAY AND LIVE IN A COTTAGE WITH?

@leaderwon, no reasons 🫶

MUTUAL YOU MOST WANT TO BE CLASSMATES/FRIENDS IRL WITH?

@luhvlyuna she's so cool and I feel like we'd get along and start our own school gossip page for fun 🫶

SPOUSE MATERIAL MUTUAL?

@cutieseo. that's it, cutieseo.

MUTUAL WITH THE BEST PERSONALITY?

all of my moots hv the bestest personality though since i need to pick, i'll say @leaderwon @koishua @wonieleles

MUTUAL THAT NEVER FAILS TO MAKE YOU LAUGH?

@saeshiros @leaderwon they're both unintentionally funny

MUTUAL WITH THE PRETTIEST THEME?

@soov @luvhyun3 @peripea

MUTUAL YOU'D HAVE A CRUSH ON IF YOU KNEW THEM IRL?

@koishua you're so cool i'd probably develop like a slight crush on u tbh

MUTUAL YOU CANNOT ABSOLUTELY LIVE WITHOUT?

della haters (i miss u all everyday) @iichaeyj @cutieseo @saeshiros

MUTUAL YOU WANT TO GET TO KNOW BETTER?

@dazed-hee @wonieleles @koishua @jennaissantes @kynrki basically all of my moots tbh but I'm shy kind of 😭😭 hoping for more interactions w every one of my moots

[veilchenjaeger]

It's that time of the year again and this is my SXX Exchange letter! Just keep scrolling if u see this on the dashboard!

Hello, nameless friend! (And hello mod who might check this for matching reasons!) Thank you for joining me at the Yi City campfire! The following novella contains some hopefully helpful information on what to get at the farmers' market and inspiration for what you could make for dinner. I hope you won't have to threaten any potato merchants! ||-)

General DNW:

Incest (Mentions of Jin Guangyao and Qin Su are okay, but nothing explicit, please.)

Anything to do with age play or DDLG

Explicit underage sex or adult/underage relationships

Noncon between the main ship if there’s a happy ending

A/B/O or animalistic traits

Bathroom kinks or emetophilia

Feminisation as a kink

Pregnancy

Infidelity

PWP (I’m a lesbian and don’t enjoy porn about men for the porn’s sake, so I prefer my smut plotty/with a focus on feelings.)

Quick “fixes” for disabilities (e.g. Song Lan magically getting a new tongue instead of learning how to speak without one)

First person POV or POV switches within the same scene (I’m always confused when that happens. POV switches in separate scenes are very cool tho!)

A’ight here come the oddly specific ones:

Violent sex or sexy punching/fistfighting/whatever you call that, especially involving Song Lan. (Rough sex is fine, especially between Xuexiao!) Generally, portrayals of Song Lan as an aggressive or violent person are not my vibe.

Fics set in the US.

Mean Dom (or generally mean) Xiao Xingchen or Song Lan. (Xue Yang can be as mean as he likes. He’s a free spirit who does what he wants.)

Exclusive sub Xue Yang.

General likes:

Mysophobic Song Lan

Blind Xiao Xingchen

Xue Yang being a terrible person <3

A-Qing is one of my favourite characters in MDZS and I adore her (potential) dynamics with all of the Yi City boys, so if she fits into the story/art, I’d love to see her!

Closed triangle SXX :,) <3

Songxiao’s BDE (Big Divorced Energy), no matter whether they’re exes or still/back together.

I periodically go feral over how Songxue spent all those years together in Yi City and thus probably know each other pretty well, and how they and A-Qing are the only ones left who loved Xiao Xingchen. I love odd Songxue companionship, is what I’m saying.

Catharsis and tenderness born from pain, and any mixture of dark themes and softness.

Found families and close platonic relationships.

Non-sexual (and non-physical!) intimacy. Not that sexual intimacy isn’t great too, of course.

Genderbends! (In the “All of them are always women” sense.) Feel free to make SXX girls for any of the prompts.

I vibe with both novel and CQL canon as well as amalgamations of the two.

Any setting/AU is good! My personal favourites are canon verse/jianghu, historical settings (especially if they teach me something about that period in time), and Modern/Modern with Cultivation, but if inspiration strikes for, like, a SciFi AU, that’s cool.

Dead doves are fine! I currently kinda prefer happy endings, but I’m also not opposed to being hurt if you have a really cool idea to hurt me with.

Kisses. Honestly, if you just give me a sketch/1000 words of them kissing, I’m happy.

A word for a nameless artist friend:

My brain is extremely focused on storytelling, which is probably obvious from how I write prompts. I adore fanart so, so much tho and I want to make sure you, hypothetical artist friend, aren’t overwhelmed by the storytelling focus, hence this section. Anything inspired by the prompts would be awesome to see, whether it’s something with the same aesthetic or a scene from one of the prompted scenarios. Pick and choose whatever vibes or details inspire you; I’m excited to see the results.

Art-specific general likes (though I like all art): Intimate moments and intimate touches, visible emotions, fashion designs, symbolism and compositions with Meaning that I can analyse like an art historian, fun homages to aesthetics like Tarot cards or Art Nouveau or, idk, medieval altar paintings, and yet again the kisses.

The requests for your convenience:

All of the details included in these prompts are meant to inspire, not to limit you! Feel free to ignore what doesn't work for you.

Request 1: Xue Yang re-ignites Songxiao’s passion for their old dream

I so want to see Songxuexiao sit around the Yi City campfire (or somewhere else), discuss politics and ethics together, and collectively bitch about the Great Sects. That's enough of a prompt already, but I picture the following scenario:

Things in Yi City have somehow worked out in everyone’s favour, no one is dead, and Songxuexiao and A-Qing have decided on some sort of truce. (Whether or not it already involves SXX kisses is up to you.) However, the events leading up to this fragile peace have left Xiao Xingchen and Song Lan disillusioned, and although they are slowly rebuilding their relationship, they no longer believe in their old dream of founding a sect. The fact that they did go through a divorce and have grown apart in the process probably doesn’t help.

Enter Xue Yang, who has strong opinions on the established sects being hypocritical bastards and the backstory to back those opinions up. Song Lan and Xiao Xingchen are shocked to find out that they agree on a lot when it comes to politics, although they obviously have vastly different approaches to reacting to this unjust system. Even worse – discussing this with Xue Yang (and possibly finding out about Chang Ci’an) lights a spark of old passion – surely someone should DO something about this – and suddenly someone’s having persistent thoughts of sect-building again.

Optional wants:

It might be fun if initially, only one daozhang experienced a Xue Yang-induced activism relapse – especially if it’s Song Lan; just imagine him reacting to the fact that Xue fucking Yang made him feel like he could make a difference in the world again.

The results of all this (Songxuexiao sect?? Dreams of one? Taking the first steps towards building one?) would also be very fun to look at, especially for the art side of things.

Request 2: Song Lan and Xue Yang take care of a distressed Xiao Xingchen

That’s it, that’s the prompt. I have a specific scenario in mind (see below), but if inspiration strikes in a different way, go wild.

I’m imagining a setting where Xiao Xingchen is pretty fragile and questioning his ability to be a good person, and Xue Yang is sort of aware of how fragile Xiao Xingchen is and knows that he doesn’t want to lose him. So, post-fix-it Yi City or something the like? Where Xiao Xingchen is either back from the dead or got very close to shattering himself? It can also be an AU with similar vibes, of course.

The idea is that Xiao Xingchen fucks up and accidentally really hurts Song Lan and/or Xue Yang. Because he’s Xiao Xingchen and his entire self-image is built around being a good and helpful person, he can’t deal with that at all. (This is the guy who ripped his own eyes out and then left Song Lan on a celestial mountain to make up for something that wasn’t his fault, and also the guy who didn’t kill Xue Yang but shattered his own soul upon learning that he’d been tricked into doing awful things! He’s a mess!) Anyways, I’d like to see Song Lan and Xue Yang deal with that by gathering up the puddle that is Xiao Xingchen and showing him – in their own odd ways – that he’s forgiven, he’s loved, and he’s allowed to make one (1) mistake every now and then.

Optional wants:

Song Lan and Xue Yang having very different styles of comforting Xiao Xingchen, and both of those maybe not working super well! Xue Yang probably hasn’t comforted anyone in his life! His goal is to make Xiao Xingchen happy again (so that Xiao Xingchen doesn’t do stupid things like shattering his soul) and otherwise he’s completely out of his depth! Song Lan’s sort of idealized image of Xiao Xingchen might not be super helpful either! It might be fun if they’d both fail on their own, but manage to make it work together. Two negatives make a positive.

I’d love to see that very odd careful/caretaking side of Xue Yang that he shows when he’s cleaning Xiao Xingchen’s corpse or offering A-Qing advice on how to take revenge on her enemies.

Generally, I like Hurt/Comfort and complicated emotions better than pure fluff, so lean into the angst if you want to.

An A-Qing can be freely added to this scenario.

Request 3: Xiao Xingchen comes down from the mountain, but it’s the 21st century

Everything’s the same: Xiao Xingchen, disciple of the immortal Baoshan Sanren, leaves the celestial mountain never to return, hoping to be able to help the people of the world – only that it’s 2022 (or 1950 or another year of your choosing) and he ends up in modern China. Baoshan Sanren’s mountain, meanwhile, is firmly stuck in ancient ways, and Xiao Xingchen has thus never even heard of electricity. Cue one confused Xiao Xingchen, on his own in this strange world until he runs into some handsome boys (and possibly a cheeky girl), an equally confused Song Lan who’d like to get this beautiful man a goddamn ID, and a probably delighted Xue Yang who just gained a new, very ethereal toy.

Optional wants/further musings:

I adore Modern with Cultivation settings and thinking about how a world where ghosts and demonic beings are an observable part of reality might be different from our own, so if you like that, too, I’d love some worldbuilding details.

Wei Wuxian might be fun to add as a supporting character! I enjoy the thought of him and Xiao Xingchen being friends, and Xiao Xingchen might try to look for his shijie’s son? That’s like, super optional tho.

I’m imagining this with Ghibli vibes/visuals. No idea why and this as well is super optional, but maybe it’s inspiring.

Request 4: Resurrected (?) Xiao Xingchen is miserable, and Song Lan tries to bring back Xue Yang

Somehow (Wei Wuxian? An old plan of Xue Yang’s? Time and patience?), Xiao Xingchen’s soul gets restored and he is resurrected. Song Lan gets to apologise, Songxiao get to travel the world together again, it’s all Song Lan hadn’t dared to hope for in his wildest dreams. The only problem is that Xiao Xingchen is doing horribly. He 1) obviously isn’t over what happened in Yi City 2) still blames himself for the innocent people he killed, Song Lan’s and A-Qing’s deaths, and having trusted Xue Yang 3) probably also blames himself for the fact that he misses and mourns his nameless friend, and no matter what Song Lan does to make things better, it doesn’t work. Maybe his earnest devotion isn’t what Xiao Xingchen needs. Maybe Xiao Xingchen needs someone who can take his mind off things, someone who makes him laugh. Maybe he needs Xue Yang.

That’s the idea Song Lan gets, anyways. Maybe Xiao Xingchen (or A-Qing or Wei Wuxian?) told him a little about how Xue Yang helped Xiao Xingchen recover after Baixue Temple, or maybe Song Lan just remembers Xue Yang’s unexpected devotion to Xiao Xingchen and figured he might be able to help? Or the reasons are less emotional and the resurrection went wrong in a way Wei Wuxian can’t fix? Either way, Song Lan is desperate to find a way to make Xiao Xingchen not try to shatter himself again, and getting Xue Yang’s help is his last resort. So he sets out to find/contact/resurrect Xue Yang. Xiao Xingchen might or might not be horrified by that.

The Xingchen resurrection part is optional; it can also be another brand of “Xiao Xingchen lives after the events of Yi City” OR even a complete AU. (Song Lan tries to contact Xiao Xingchen’s horrible ex bc he can’t figure out how to make Xiao Xingchen less depressed?)

Optional wants:

If Song Lan is a fierce corpse, it would be fun if his insecurities re.: being dead played into his decisions here. How could he, a monster, ever be what Xingchen needs?

Some odd sort of companionship between Songxue (+ A-Qing) as the ones who’d do anything for Xiao Xingchen and know that about each other would be dope.

DNW:

Xiao Xingchen immediately forgiving Xue Yang.

Zichen is my dearest beloved, so the flavour I’m looking for here is “Song Lan has a hard time helping Xiao Xingchen, blames himself and goes overboard looking for a solution bc Songxiao are bad at communicating” rather than “Song Lan is actually incapable of helping Xiao Xingchen/not what Xiao Xingchen needs”.

It wouldn’t sit right with me if A-Qing weren’t mentioned at all. I’d love to see her involved in all this, of course, but even if she doesn’t end up playing a role, I feel like there should be a reason for that? I’d have a hard time believing that Song Lan would try to get Xue Yang to help if A-Qing were an option.

Request 5: Fierce corpse issues

This one’s super vague! I’d like to see something focused on the specific trials that come with Song Lan being a fierce corpse, both for Song Lan himself and for the rest of the Yi City crew. Here are some optional ideas:

Song Lan dealing with the fact that he runs on resentful energy now and that his control over said energy can slip. I bet that’s scary for him specifically, seeing that losing his temper usually doesn’t go well for him!

Fierce corpse maintenance! Either in the form of regular maintenance, or Xue Yang “updating” Song Lan with new features, adding things that he finds useful or “installing” updates Song Lan would like to have (better control of his resentful energy, less rigor mortis, a working dick – something like that).

How does being dead (inherently unclean!) interact with Song Lan’s mysophobia? How does he feel about maybe having to be touched regularly for maintenance?

Xiao Xingchen and A-Qing could learn some basic demonic cultivation, if so inclined, to help with fierce corpse maintenance or to be able to calm Song Lan down if he ever loses control. (How would Song Lan feel about Xiao Xingchen learning demonic cultivation for him?)

Fierce corpse management as (platonic, romantic, or sexual) intimacy! That might help Song Lan with any insecurities he might have regarding the fact that he's dead.

Speaking of insecurities, a potentially fun dynamic: Song Lan, who avoids touching Xue Yang because 1) he is mysophobic 2) he is dead and would potentially contaminate others with his unclean energy vs. Xue Yang, who already took Song Lan’s mysophobia reaction extremely personally in the Villainous Friends extra and assumes that Song Lan avoiding touch = Song Lan thinking Xue Yang in particular is disgusting.

There’s of course the option of Xiao Xingchen (or someone else) also being a fierce corpse and Song Lan maybe helping out as the senior fierce corpse.

Wants/DNW/further musings:

I’m imagining either a (fix-it?) setting where they’re all alive/undead, or alternatively a more depressing version where Xiao Xingchen is a shattered soul in a bag, and fierce corpse maintenance could go hand in hand with soul fragment maintenance? I’m not picky.

I’d really like to see A-Qing here, with her and Song Lan platonically bonding. Maybe she’s part of the fix-it crew, or she is working together with Xue Yang and Song Lan to bring back Xiao Xingchen?

I’m not into explicit gore, but feel free to go grotesque with this if you want to!

I hope something here piqued your interest! Have fun creating <3

[cmterygrl]

ghost nsfw hcs

a/n: rqed by anon <3 srry it took actual months to answer who knows if u will even see this now 😭

general thoughts:

- loves lightly pressing down on your lower stomach to feel how deep he is. he'll make some comment about how well you take him – whether he says this as praise or degradation.. who knows.

- eye contact is Huge with him – in and outside the bedroom. likes it even more if it makes you flustered, and will use it against you. doesnt like it when you turn away from him, will hold your face and make you look at him when you cum. if hes in a really dominant mood, he Will punish you for breaking eye contact.

- i feel like he likes to use sex as a stress reliever But that doesnt mean he cant be passionate !! theres times where all he wants is to be close to you and please you, in which case he'll be trailing gentle kisses down your body and his hands will gently hold you, movements nice and slow and loving - he'll mumble soft praises and likes to kiss you deeply while you come.

- also really into dirty talk. of course if it's all okay with you, which he will make sure of first, his mouth is filthy. he'll mix in some praise but in such a condescending voice it's basically degrading. dirty talk and some low grunts and breaths is basically all the noise he makes in bed, he's definitely not dead silent but isn't very vocal otherwise.

kinks + positions:

- i've seen a lot of hcs for ghost where hes like super kinky and into hardcore shit but honestly … i feel like hes rather vanilla 🥸 . like the kinks that he does have aren't super intense and he isn't super into bdsm, not on him at least.

- i don't think he'll mind physically restricting his partner but because of his trauma and everything i dont think he'll like it being done on himself. at most he'll hold ur wrists above ur head with one of his hands or maybe use his belt or something. he just doesn't like it being too restrictive and wants to let you go as fast as possible if/when you say the safe word.

- any position where he can make eye contact with you and see ur pretty face is his favorite tbh. i would say he's into classic missionary and likes to have ur leg thrown over his shoulder so he can reach a little deeper. (also mating press is a close second in his top favorites)

- cowgirl is usually reserved for when he's tired and just wants to admire you on top of him. he loves the sight and its one of the few times he would 'give up' control. his hands would still be on your hips, guiding your movements while praise spills from his lips, encouraging you to keep going even when your thighs start to burn and is quick to say how proud of you he is when you ultimately tap out and get too tired.

xtra:

- ik i've said everyone was big for my past two nsfw hcs but … ghost has bde idk what u want me to do abt it 🤷‍♂️ i'd say a little over 6in and definitely thick, some prominent veins and a flushed tip 🫢.

- happy trail !! i feel like unless u mention it, he doesn't trim his hair that often. he doesn't have much to begin with but for the most part just lets it do its thing as usually he doesnt have time or just forgets to shave. not that he doesn't trim at all but it takes a while to grow back so he doesn't worry about it until he notices.

[thewickedharlot]

Something we don’t discuss often enough is the enigma that is Damian Kozak and his BDE. On paper there seems to be very little that would lead one to believe that some of the most attractive women in the industry would even glance his way and yet somehow he has, and let me quote one of his more notable exs, a long list of ex lovers, that I know a lot of people would die for.

From the earliest we can track down that we can say is for sure was Bonnie Astor (nee Walker), before she was somebody anybody cared about. Judging by their socials, it was an on and off thing for a few years, right up until Damian fell into a trap of his own in the form of Olivia Bennett. (Although it looks like they had a brief comeback given the public brawl between Damian and Fletcher Astor)

It’s still unclear how the two ended up on each others radars. The pair were first linked in the comment section of Damian's Instagram where they bonded over the existence of aliens of all things? Damian and her sister, Stella Bennett are friends so it’s possible that’s the connecting factor but somehow Olivia sunk her teeth into Damian and what happened next was the weirdest series of events that has ever been triggered by such a basic looking man. 

Public sex, a weird feud that resulted in Bonnie somehow getting to open for Olivia on both legs of her last world tour and a reality television show being where it all ends makes sense. It was a trainwreck right until the very end. It was the “I Love You” heard around the world followed by the most public rejection possible and one of the few times we’ve ever looked at Olivia and thought ‘Girl Boss’ until it became clear she left him for Phoenix Undergrove and potentially caused his death (Wtf girl?). 

Damian disappears after for a while after which makes sense because, duh embarrassing, and then finds himself linked to two other women. First, he’s spotted in a park with Elyssa Rappaport. Which, wow talk about out of his league. However more recently it appears that Damian and Kimber Tate have gotten engaged. Admittedly, Kimber makes the most sense out of these women, but the way this man has to be packing because why else would anyone want to tolerate his long winded monologues about the meaning of life and death? 

There is one other woman Damian keeps around, for longer than we can prove, Peach Rivera. And honestly, we have no idea how the pair met or why they appear close but a deep dive into their socials makes us think its been a while and the only reason we can think she’d stick around him as long as she has is the same reason all these other women keep coming back. He’s packing. 

So who’s next or is the marriage going to stick? We simply cannot wait to see how this all plays out but you can catch Damian on tour supporting Cole Addams with his ex Bonnie Astor and the amount of tour tickets that were sold simply because people want to be there when this all implodes (We have tickets to at least 6 shows already just in case) Stay tuned. It’s sure to be a disaster. 

[anakinskywalkerog]

OH MY GOD 🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨🚨

cred to hourlyhayden on twitter how DARE this photo i will not be able to stop thinking about this for the rest of the night

[ivesambrose]

Pick a gif which tugs at your heart and/or evokes a long lost memory or a dream. 💙

To book a personal reading with me DM or email me at jovescorpioreadings@gmail.com 💫

1.

2.

3.

1.

You've prayed for them, manifested them into your life. You've asked and received.

They've broken tradition in some way. Either in their family, social group/community or they will be the one who breaks your usual type.

A very good listener. Has a penetrative gaze, their facial expressions are actually very emotive. You'd actually find it fascinating.

Anytime they're stressed they'll go and take a walk or be out in nature. They gather inspiration from there as well. They value they quiet time but they also work well with others. They know several people likely but trust very few. Probably have this same set of close friends for the past several years. They don't really open up easily but their aura is comforting. Pretty non judgemental and grounded.

A leader / has latent leadership qualities in a group setting. (can have a strong Aries or Mars influence in them)

Might be into puzzles, board games, putting things together.

Experimental and changes their look often. But they pull it off brilliantly.

Looks really good in red and / or white.

Strong morals, strong sense of right and wrong. They could be going through something but it's not easily visible on their face. Could have an air rising (gemini, libra or aquarius) or can keep a poker face.

Very attractive. Since they do change their appearance often they have definitely bleached their hair at one point. Fair skin with a sun-kissed glow / tan to them. Broad - strong shoulders, narrow waist, strong legs. Might have played sports or is good at sports. This is someone who learns things relatively quick given how attentive they are.

I'm tempted to say they have daddy vibes. Yes even if they identify as female. They have the BDE.

Ambivert but leaning a little more towards the introvert side. However in social settings they do handle things well given their confidence regardless of how shy they can be. However once you get to know them they'd be very quirky and funny around you. The kind to randomly do a weird tik tok challenge but for you/close friends/cuz they felt like it and not the camera

Cinematography, cinema, editing, photography.

Well travelled, street smart and knowledgeable.

They love hoarding knowledge, you'd be surprised.

You'll meet them when you leave a place/location or situation that's been causing you stress and giving you more anxiety and repression than peace and progress. Highly likely during travel or once you've relocated to some place.

2.

Sensual. So damn sensual and captivating. They look unreal sometimes honestly it's intimidating.

Something about their voice is downright so enchanting and sexy. You can't help but feel attracted to them, it's almost annoying how drawn you feel. (possible lilith rising, could have scorpio and taurus or capricorn placements) I mean I wouldn't be surprised if they sing, have an asmr channel, are a speaker, spokesperson or representative etc

Very dreamy, rather spiritual as well. They definitely have faith in something that they feel is above them. They seem a little prone to really vivid dreams as well as nightmares. Might even be a bit clairvoyant or Clairsentient.

Secure in their business and career might own a business actually. Thing is there is a lot of goals they want to accomplish. But they're not the kind to stall it, they actively go for it. They don't care, they'll achieve it. Especially if you tell them that they can't, then they definitely will. However their ambitions aren't the shallow kind, they really do want to leave a mark or simply express themselves for how they are on the inside.

Either they look like a complete softie, care bear, mom friend or they look like a siren or what Christian Grey thought he was or they have the aura Eric Draven had in The Crow or Maleficent carries. There's no in between. They switching positions like that Ariana song.

They have the most kissable lips.

Highly likely have tattoos because they love the sensation of getting inked.

Tall, lean, Dark hair, dark eyes, beauty spots, really nice hands. Look really good in every shade of blue and green, black (definitely black) and even certain floral or geometric prints. They may also like wearing accessories a lot.

For some reason I saw a crown.

Emotional and intense, they need a creative outlet of expression or they shut down. Like, I kid you not they need to at least once completely lose themselves in something then come home and pass out on the sofa.

Expect a lot of thoughtful random gifts and display of affections from them. They're a bit possesive, I almost feel they can be a little bratty but oh when they look at you, they have eyes only for you. Talking to them is finding a best friend from a life you have no knowledge of but yet it feels right.

Sincere

Trust

Romantic

Passionate

Beach baby / loves the water. Doesn't really like the cold as much.

They may have a pet? They seem to be very good with animals.

You'd meet them when you feel really good about yourself, you'd be really feeling yourself or would have achieved something. Making travel plans or setting your next goals it might even be night. It'll feel perfect actually, right it happened at the right time. You'd be getting signs though but I feel you'd be preparing yourself for other exciting stuff to take proper note of them and boom it happens.

3.

An explorer, a seeker, a student who wants to keep learning, keep being a ray of sunshine in everyone's life.

They seek their soul family/found family or would really want a family of their own someday. Very good with kids likely or at most, very patient with different types of people.

Honestly if they were a Pokémon they'd be bulbasaur.

Regardless of their age they're very youthful, the inner child is intact.

They might dress very vintage or old school. Very laid back actually. Also something about walking barefeet on wooden floors came up. They look they belong in a old photograph / polaroid almost. I'm not getting much on their looks besides they look like they belong in a painting or old polaroid. They feel like home, they feel like laying in a field and relishing the golden hour, they feel the the type whose hand you'd hold and run off with. Red and browns are definitely their color, they pull of the muted tones really well. (almost thought of Taylor Swift's Willow music video)

Might have a strong aquarius and capricorn influence in their chart as well.

Their upbringing may not have been in the best conditions but they've worked very hard or are working very hard to improve their quality of life or give back to their family in some way. In some way they've turned their life around. They did a full 180. Crazy.

Deep voice. Warm whispers.

Honey in tea.

Carnations, lilies and red grapes.

They'd like to celebrate the little victories in their life with you. They get happy over the simple things so much, I can just feel my heart melt because of this person and their smile. They're so affectionate and kind and it's making me tear up almost. Wow.

Also they smell really nice. Flowery notes maybe?

They love touching foreheads.

Might play an instrument or paint.

Honestly, I kid you not. They feel straight out of a fantasy book. The closest characters I can think of is Westley from Princess Bride, Aurora from Maleficent and Belle from Beauty and the beast.

You'll likely meet them when you've shut out something toxic in your life. You may not even be looking for love, this might be after a break up even, you may even be escaping a situation or be away from a gathering and be around New people / faces you aren't as familiar with when this happens. Your anxiety will ease around this person. You might even had a passing thought or dream of this scenario before it happens but you'll brush off the thought thinking that isn't possible or something, then you'll be in for a surprise regardless.

[mindofharry]

In which you’re sam’s sister and bucky definitely has a crush on you.

this is my first piece for bucky, so i’m super excited and hope you like it!!! smut and fluff :D feedback is welcome as always. enjoy! <3

You loved being home.

After the blip happened and it felt like nothing was right anymore, you and sarah became closer than ever. You, sam and sarah have always been close. You’re those sort of siblings. You and sarah would sneak out together, top and tail on the boat and most importantly take absolute shit about your brother sam. But he did it right back.

Your parents raised you well.

The blip happened and sarah felt all alone. Actually, she was all alone except for her two boys. You got the first plane back home and immediately became like the boys’ second mom. You’re the cool aunt. The good cop. The boys absolutely adore you, the same way they adore sam. They just don’t see him as much as you and sarah would like. It’s not his fault, he’s off being a superhero or whatever.

You’re still not completely sure what he does. Flying? Fighting? Putting away bad guys? Who knows. And honestly, now, you’re past the point of caring.

Sam came home, said he’d take care do stuff and then he upped and left again. But it’s superhero stuff, sarah said. To cut him some slack. So that’s exactly what you’re trying to do now as you watch sam absolutely destroy the boat. You’re over with a clipboard, helping sarah tick things off, double checking everywhere is where they’re supposed to be. Sam is meant to be fixing up the boat, so you can sell it.

Not that you want to.

But he’s definitely making it worse.

A tall, brunette man comes over to your brother, helping and teaching how to mend that specific part of the boat. You bit your lip looking at the way the brunettes muscles bulged and the way his veins popped.

Veins? Seriously? You’re really finding vein attractive right now. You can tell that sam and the mysterious man are somewhat friendly, but you can almost feel the tension and you’re a good bit away from them.

“Y/N?” Sarah called again, getting fed up. You were too distracted looking at the hunk fixing the boat. Sarah followed your eyeline and then understood why you were distracted. She hummed and put down the cup in her hand, dragging you along the pier to the boat. You didn’t even register what was happened until halfway there.

“Sarah, what are you doing?” You asked shaking her hand, sarah just giggled shaking her head. You deserved this. Sarah wasn’t going to let you talk yourself out of this one, not for her or the boys. You always did this and although sarah appreciated you not bringing random people back home, she wouldn’t mind you going out and finding some new friends. Sarah always feared that she was holding you back, especially after the blip.

“I’m helping you out” She whispered as you both came into view of the boys. Sam saw the look on sarah’s face first. Oh shit, he thought. Sarah didn’t know when to stop meddling or when was the right time to do shit like this. Sam was not going to let either of his sister go out with bucky barnes.

Not happening.

Bucky hadn’t seen a woman more beautiful then you before. Your hair is natural, curly but you suited it. It went right around your round face ending at your shoulders. Your eyes are blue and bright, nothing like Sams. But Bucky can tell your all siblings from your cheeks, they’re like apples.

Sam looked at Bucky and saw him looking you up and down, Sarah was trying to be discreet so were you and maybe sam would’ve fell for it, if you and Bucky weren’t eye fucking each other.

“I’m sarah” Sarah said, giving bucky a welcoming smile. Bucky smiled back nodding his head, and then looked to you. You placed one hand on your hip and the other hand was still holding onto the clipboard.

“Y/N” You said smiling at him, more flirtatious. Bucky bit his lip and leaned against the boat machinery.

“Bucky” He replied quickly, sam looked over at sarah and then the two. He couldn’t help but roll his eyes. You tutted at sam, before sarah pulled you away from the two boys. You both giggled all the way back to your ‘station’.

Sam looked at bucky, as bucky watched you walk away. The sway in your hips even made him hard.

“Do not flirt with my sister” Sam said and bucky rolled his eyes.

“Of course”

Bucky walked off, leaving sam to stand there and try to piece together what just happened. You and bucky? His sister and the winter soldier?

Not fucking happening.

You and sarah arrived home, the boys came home about an hour later. The neighbourhood always helps out with schools runs and just looking after the boys, you and sarah always make sure to do the same. Some of these people helped raise you and your siblings. It’s the least you guys could do.

“You have any homework?” You asked, placing a hand on your nephews head. He shook his head and continued to eat.

You loved those boys to death. You’d do anything for them.

After helping with dinner and helping the boys get ready for bed, you decide that maybe heading to bed early would be nice. You haven’t been getting much sleep lately, not with sam out with those dangerous flag smashers. Something about them doesn’t sit right with you. But you understand that sam has a job to do, you’ll just have to get over it.

“I’m heading to bed” Sam said, poking his head inside your room. You were laying on top of your bed, comfy clothes on. You smiled and got up, going to hug your brother.

“I missed you” You said and sam sighed holding you tighter. “You know i always miss you more” Sam teased kissing your forehead.

“My friend, from the boat, bucky is staying over just for tonight. If you go down, make him feel welcome. not too welcome though” Sam warned, pulling back from the hug and pointing his index finger at you. You shrugged and leaned against the wall.

“Can’t promise anything, Sammy” You said and Sam rolled his eyes, before walking off to his room mumbling some gibberish. Probably annoyed at the comment you made. His friend is hot, and you can just tell from looking at him that he has a big dick.

Bucky barnes has bde. Big dick energy. There’s no denying that.

You walk over to your bed and curse yourself when you see there’s no water on your bedside table. It takes you even longer to sleep without a nice glass of cold water, you don’t know why but it’s been like that since you were a child.

That means you have to go down and see bucky.

You have no idea why you’re so nervous. Well, you do, he’s hot. But he’s sam friend. But he’s hot.

You contemplate for a good five minutes, before deciding that you’ll get your drink. This is your house and you’re both adults. You can do this, say hi, get your drink and then go to bed. It’s easy enough.

You open your door and make your way down to the kitchen, to get to the kitchen you have to walk through the living room. Where bucky is.

He probably doesn’t even remember your name, relax you told yourself. You opened the living room door and was met with a wide awake bucky. He was still clothed (thank god), laying on his back watching tv. He looked up immediately when he saw you.

“Did i wake you, i’m sorry” He apologised sitting up trying to find the remote.

“No, no i was just coming down to get a drink” You said, cursing yourself at how shaking your voice was. Bucky definitely heard the tumble in your words, he smirked to himself.

You grew a little more confident with that. As you walked into the kitchen, you swayed yours hips a bit more and bent down to get a glass. You made sure bucky could see. You heard him groan under his breath. Fuck, he sounds so good.

“Can i sit?” You asked and bucky nodded quickly, moving over on the couch. He was watching some stupid drama show, you could tell he really didn’t understand it. It was endearing to say the least.

“I-“

“So-“

You both laughed, you looked down at your water.

“So, are you and sam close?” Bucky asked and you nodded. “Yeah, all of us are. We were definitely those siblings” You said and bucky nodded.

“Were?” He asked and you shrugged, looking down at your water again. “Sams a superhero. He’s got more important things to do. Sarah and i stayed close, but sam just drifted. But we’re getting better again” You said, and bucky nodded kind of understanding. It was the same with him and steve when they met again. They drifted, but they put in the work.

But then steve left.

“How are things with you?” You asked and bucky sighed.

You knew you weren’t going to get an honest answer, so you didn’t push when he didn’t answer.

A few minutes passed, no one talked. And then, bucky looked over at you. You were looking at the tv, laughing softly. Your eyes lit up and your smile was huge.

“You’re beautiful” Bucky whispered and you looked over at him, eyes widened. “So are you” You whispered moving closer to him. Bucky took the water out of your hand and placed it on the floor, before looking back up at you.

“Can i kiss you?” He asked and you whimpered nodding your head. “Please” You said and bucky, crashed his lips into yours. You moaned quietly, trying not to attract any unwanted attention. His lips are soft, warm and inviting. You never want to stop kissing him.

He pecks your lip, moving so he could take your shirt off. You were bare, your tits out and bucky couldn’t keep his eyes off of them.

“Sit back” You ordered, taking his shirt off, then sitting on his lap. You had your knees on either side of bucky, your hands on his shoulders. His eye were wide and he was dying to kiss you. Fuck, he was already so infatuated by you. He wished he knew you before. Before everything. Before the winter solider, before all the wars even before steve.

“I’m going to ride you” You said and bucky nodded, pecking your lips three times. You bit your lips trailing your kisses down his neck, he moaned and you shushed him.

“Don’t want anyone hearing us, ok?”

You sit up to remove your shorts and bucky chuckled, “No underwear?” He asked and you shrugged. “Had a feeling i was going to get fucked tonight” You said and buckys eyes almost rolled to the back of his, he could cum his from your dirty words.

You moaned as bucky pressed his thigh against your core. Buckys hands were on your hips, guiding you on which to go with your hips. His jeans were hitting just the right place. You rock your hips down against his thigh, opening up your eyes to see bucky already looking at you and biting back a moan.

“Now are you going to fuck me or not?”

Bucky wasted no time in take his pants off. You nearly toppled off the couch and that made you giggle loudly, bucky put his hand over your mouth to stop you. God, you liked that way more than you probably should of.

Buckys tip teased your bundle of nerves, slowly inching himself in. You moaned and through your head back in pleasure. He was huge, and you were going to be really fucking sore, but it is so worth it. You begin to move, bucking your hips up, that makes bucky groan and then it’s your turn to put your hand over buckys mouth.

Oddly, he likes it too.

Bucky guides you down on his cock again, a little more rough this time kneading your ass cheeks. You whimpered bouncing up and down. He slapped your ass and you moaned, bringing your down to his shoulder to bite it. Fuck, so much pleasure all at once.

It’s euphoric.

Bucky took this as his opportunity to pound up into you. He’s never felt this close with someone before.

“I’m gonna cum” You said and bucky nodded.

“Gonna cum together” Bucky said sternly.

You both hit your climax at the same time, your shaking and buckys mind is in another dimension leaning against the back of the couch.

“Fuck” You said getting off of buckys lap.

He smirked and pecked your lips.

“Yeah, fuck”