#whatever and a professional editor to help them

[penig]

Finish it. Unless you're a huge name, nobody wants to know about unfinished work, because they can't tell if you're going to finish it! There are far too many talented authors who don't have the stamina to finish a work to take a chance on one.

Also, single-author story collections are a hard sell. Not impossible, but hard - you'd have to blow their socks off. Broadly speaking you'd be better off selling each story separately to a periodical (not as easy as it used to be and it was never easy), for which you not only don't need an agent, but won't be able to get one, and hoping they go over well enough to justify a collection.

You need to find the professional writing community so you aren't driven to asking random strangers on the internet. Look for classes and associations in your local area. Different genres have professional associations for writers, such as the Mystery Writers of America, Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators, etc. in addition to the Writer's Guild, the freelance writers' union, and they all have conventions and publications. When they have an event geared toward beginning authors, much of the information they provide is applicable across genres.

Forty years ago when I was starting there was an entire cottage industry around teaching writers how to get published, and you could go to a newsstand and pick up magazines geared toward authors trying to find their feet, as well as review and publishing industry magazines - a subscription to Locus used to be essential for science fiction writers, and American children's authors still pay close attention to School Library Journal. A lot of this material and activity has inevitably moved online and I have lost track of it, but it hasn't gone away entirely.

To find the publishers most likely to be interested in a kind of work, there is no substitute for reading current publications. You have to keep up with the market. Broad-based review sources can help you narrow it down, but honestly the best thing you can do is pay attention to what new stuff you're already reading.

The indicia of the books you read will tell you the name and address of the publisher, as well as the specific imprint it was published under, and that imprint will lead you to the editor. Acknowledgements will invariably name editors, assistants, and agents. If you read the kind of thing you write - and you should! - you already have basic information on the people who are interested in what you write.

Go look up their online presence, where you can find out important things like whether they're even open for submissions, whether they accept unagented submissions, what they are looking for, and - most importantly - the Submission Guidelines. Always read the submission guidelines and always follow them! If they specify a format, you follow that format. If all they want is a query letter, don't send them anything but a query letter; if they want the query letter and a one-page or one-paragraph or 500-word synopsis, send them that; if they want the first ten pages, or the first chapter, or whatever they want, send those pages. Not following the submission guidelines is a fast track to rejection.

Traditional publishing is hard. It always has been. The point of getting an agent is that they do a lot of hard stuff for you and can get you better deals than you can get for yourself; but getting an agent is hard, too. I always tell people not to do it if you don't want it more than anything else - possibly that is too stringent, but you have to want it enough that it'll be worth the work you'll have to put in, without any surety of reward.

That's just the way it is, I'm afraid. A lot of people who can't face up to all that go for self-publishing, but that has its own issues, as it's relatively easy to do the publishing, but then you have to get on a platform (and a lot of the big ones have author-vicious contracts cough cough Kindle) and send out your own review copies and do your own marketing and that's also very hard.

So good luck to you and I hope you find out what works for you.

Do you have experience publishing a book? Awesome! I don’t.

i’m looking for a publisher for my (unfinished) collection of three stories, one of which has been published online, the rights remain with me (here as an example). is it best to wait until the full manuscript is finished to pitch? what publishers would be most likely to be interested in this work? should i pitch as myself, or do I need an agent? i have lots of experience writing for various publications, but this would be my first time publishing a book - any pointers would be helpful.

[daisies-on-a-cup]

tiktok authors being like "i work soooo hard, i've been writing this book for like 3-4 months now! authors work hard and you should never ever rate a book less than 3 stars bc we work so hard!!!"

pls go on this webbed site or ao3. some of these people have been writing one (1) work for YEARS. yeah quality can vary, but so can your books... you do not deserve an award just bc you put some effort into whatever it is you're writing, that's the bare minimum for any published piece of work...

[chaaistained]

☕︎ my marauders dr; intro •°

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🗝️ you’ve now unlocked the recipe to my marauders dr ≈

name : julia ephemeri potter

age (when i shift) : 15 — i’m experiencing the whole slow burn.. and i just know it’s gonna be torture . but we persevere

— (when i post about my script) : most of the time, i’ll be talking about me from the ages of 16-21 onwards

occupation : student of witchcraft at hogwarts

+ (eventually) some form of adult occupation . i’ll edit this later i genuinely don’t know and i don’t need to know for good few years at least so..

details :

— house : gryffindor

— wand : sandalwood with a mermaid hair core , 9.5”

+ wand breakdown

— patronus : brown bear / sable (undecided, i love both.. help)

— amortentia : ocean air , candle wax , musty books

+ amortentia breakdown

— fav subject : alchemy

— top subjects : (+ alchemy) ancient runes , charms , muggle studies

— pets : sadie / sadie sue (ginger tabby cat) , barnaby (brown barn owl , shared with james..)

side hobbies/hustles : gryffindor quidditch team seeker

+ (eventually) editorial team of the hogwarts herald

+ (eventually) prefect

s/o : regulus arcturus black ৻ꪆ

౨ৎ meet miss juju berry

an incandescence, forged of tart blood and a permeating sense of melancholy — she finds herself in a constant search, an unsolvable quest for meaning, latching onto anything that can define her identity and yet feeling irrevocably lost to herself — she is only the light, not the sun . she is only the shell, not the pearl . she is only the stain , not the blackberry

i unfurl into this reality with the kind of effervescence found in firewhiskey, a bubbling surprise of sorts, one that my own parents weren’t expecting. my mum calls me a gift, she calls my brother a blessing . i don’t know if the difference in term denotes a difference in how we’re perceived, and truth be told it drove me crazy as a kid and sometimes it still does but for whatever purpose or prosperity, the fates resolved that i was meant to be born and here i am

a toppling fire cracker of a girl, or so i’m told, i’m one of the rambunctious gryffindors that barrel down the marble hallways of hogwarts castle. i bunk with seven other girls, one of whom is my best friend — mary macdonald. along with the charming ravenclaw — emmeline vance — and a snark of a hufflepuff — hestia jones — the four of us can be found in various locations around the school campus; passed out in a heap on the softest patch of grass near the black lake , shooting pine cones over the whomping willow and keeping score of who gets the most over without the tree smacking them away , secluded in the third booth on the second floor of the library . our quills drying out while we distractedly ignore our transfiguration homework in favour of finding the right spell to conceal our carved names on the bottom of the booth’s oakwood table (the result of emmeline sneaking alcoholic butterbeer into the school, and a series of bad decisions later, we’d all drunkenly vandalised the furniture.. thankfully mcgonagall doesn’t know or i might lose my prefect badge)

with small flowers in my braid and golden earrings that shimmer as i shake my head, i slip between the sea of students with an ease that can only be spotted in the agile gait of a seeker. though, nothing about my speed on the ground can compare to that which i showcase when i’m hundreds of feet in the air, my broomstick being an extension of me, something i trust to a concerning degree, coming up with the sorts of tricks and techniques that would land me in the hospital wing if i wasn’t as good as i am. that attention to detail, the pedantic precision of my sight is also what makes me a renowned editor of the student body’s newsletter — a semi-professional scrapbook of a weekly issue, a holistic voice of all students from all houses . honestly it can be hard to maintain that harmony but perhaps that’s why dumbledore sanctioned the club, a forceful hand at coexisting

regardless, it’s the least of my worries, a pastime really, my main focus being the exceedingly irritating presence of a certain slytherin seeker, who grows more and more unbearable by the day, not to mention he’s constantly around, in almost all my classes, assigned to same hours of prefect patrol, not a moment of peace . and yet paired with that bothersome nuisance brews the burning desire to find out more

and if you want to know why, then i suppose you should keep reading

(merlin’s name, i can write intrigue splendidly, they should assign me as the journalist not just the bloody editor)

𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒

౨ৎ my black bird

a rising tide in his own right, he is determined to maintain what is deemed to be perfection, unwilling to admit that no two waves ever look the same, no two stars ever shine alike, there is no apex . and yet he tries. haunted by ancestry, rippling currents that pull him into the ravine of his family’s legacy, it’s a future he wishes to inherit whilst believing it impossible. until his brother abandoned his birthright and that status, that title, that name he always wanted to earn yet never actually trained for, was now his

that unassuming final breath before striking a curse, the calm interwoven with calamity, that’s what regulus feels in every waking moment .

there is a blurry haze of memories when he tries to decipher where it all began — did envy bleed out of him every time sirius entered the room and commanded attention with his mere presence? or was it admiration? did he love his brother or loath him? maybe neither, maybe both, maybe everything in between and nothing at all, it never made sense and it probably never will.

so then leaves the question of his own significance — fostered from birth? or handed down simply because he is the spare to the heir? in this instance both made sense but neither option would ever be clarified.

and so regulus chooses to not feel anything, reserve all emotions to be shared with a few select friends — evan and barty had a way about them, his laughter was not something he could hold back in their presence . dorcas founded a semblance of solitude even though the space was shared, as if their silence was a mutual understanding, a shorthand of sorts . pandora had the gift of gracing their group with his smile, he considered it a curse that she had such a superpower, to bring out these genuine joys in other people, but he knew she wouldn’t see it that way — those were his people

not his brother . who he shifted his eyes to look away from whenever they passed each other .. only to turn back and glance over his shoulder, observing the elder son’s movements, wishing he’d turn back too, and then hurriedly clenching his fist, squashing the thought before it even had the chance to breathe

not his parents . who stood tall yet hollow, ghosts of who they were before their family was “torn apart” according to them, holding metaphorical goal posts only to keep moving them higher and higher every time regulus attempted to score, before tutting as he slipped and fell, unable to maintain the impossible altitude of their expectations

no. his people were his friends, the people who could mellow out his misgivings, erode his stone walls

and yet, those stone walls remain intact, erosion takes time.

unless of course someone me shattered the very structure of his world view, erupting his life into firework flurries of emotions, clandestine nights, musty sunrises drenched in dew drops and fog, leaving a wafting air about the world, scented jasmine and blackberry, amber gold flecks embedded inside twin irises . the kind of beauty that haunts his dreams and burns fire in his heart

he really should not be giving in to such a tragically stupid connection, not when majority of the time is spent bickering amongst dusty textbooks, whispering shouts bouncing off cold castle walls in the middle of the night, hexes spewing back and forth before finally forfeiting from fear of being caught .. that isn’t what he should want

he shouldn’t want anything

and yet he does

𓈒⠀𓂃⠀⠀˖⠀𓇬⠀˖⠀⠀𓂃⠀𓈒

౨ৎ candlelit hearts

sinking into an unknown abyss, falling from the sky with a smile on your face while the halo around your head crackles, wax dripping down the curve of your back, you were destined to fall, that’s what you are meant to do, that’s who you are meant to be — a tidal wave tore through your heart, engulfing you entirely and yet you let yourself descend deeper and deeper — for reasons unknown, you found a companion in the darkness, a fire in the flesh, a home between interlaced fingers, foreheads pressed together and a single flickering candle flame that burns bright from the magic of your shared love

it’s funny, when i look back at it. because i suppose we always knew the other existed, but i only really met him when i was 13..

whatever classes we shared before, whatever moments were missed where we walked past each other through hallways or on moving staircases, those never really registered.

i just remember the cold, the prickly sensation of snow on my bare fingertips, crunching under my feet, glittering from the shy slithers of sunlight that flitted through the bleak grey sky. the constant dinging bells, the sound of students exploring all that hogsmeade had to offer, and yet there we stood, facing each other in an alley between shops, frowning in a way that would become all too familiar in the years to come

for what it’s worth, it’s easy to dislike the guy — almost always beating me by a few marks, his facial expression was more than enough of a gloat in itself . creating nicknames for whatever trick i use in a quidditch match and always coming up with a counter move (he can’t ever let me win. personally speaking, of course, i win plenty of matches) . it’s always something with him, and whatever quick bursts of emotion i bring out are hurriedly buried under a blank expression and a tired, almost uninterested visage that boils my blood in a way i cannot possibly describe . and yet i find myself thinking about it, about him, in the ungodly hours of the night.. only to get back at him of course

and it isn’t as if i can speak for him, for the longest time i had no clue what he’d be thinking no matter how long i stared, trying to decipher his thoughts.. but i’d be an idiot to have not noticed a change — the way he would walk through life with a strive to prove himself and yet constantly controlling how much of that ambition he could show.. living each day almost half present, half minded, elsewhere entirely, focused on a far reaching future as if it was right around the corner

he wasn’t like that anymore, he seemed to flourish, to spark, to appear alive . but only when teetering on the tightrope of an improbable partnership, an impossible romance, a strange little love story written between the aged cushions of an abandoned couch, in a hidden lounge, behind an old potions classroom — we found it together . or, more so, we argued and raced to unlock the door first, but regardless, it was our space . a space in which the kindling fire of an unlikely friendship would blossom into something greater than i could ever hope for

and when the mysteries within the castle walls start to crack through, when the secrets between the students stir the cauldron of rumours, and the history of influential families begins to pull itself up from the grave .. i guess it’s not so surprising to admit, but someone as curious as me, paired with someone as persistent as regulus? it’s no big shock that we find ourselves in the middle of such a storm

one transmutation away from uncovering the truth, waking up old bones, and burying the new ones

don’t swallow the tea leaves ! for they leave you a message 🍂

the people have spoken (i’m referring to the poll) and so i post ^this .. it did take a while bcs of numerous reasons that i don’t want to go into but anyway, i adore this dr so so much and i’ve worked so hard on the fic version of it T^T however it is a bit too traumatic for me to actually live out so .. this dr is slightly more tame — i just want to relive high school in hogwarts with the people that helped me through a lot of the shit i faced when i was in high school and they were merely characters on a screen — although, i can’t help myself, there are a few mysteries and bouts of intrigue to keep me entertained, i just .need to figure out what.. i could leave it up to my subconscious but . i don’t wanna do that ≈

chaai brews; tea assortments — dr archive

2025 © chaaistained

[tenjikufag]

omg such good haikyuu teams i totally agree!! coould i request a bokuto x m!reader with a little angst to comfort bcuz i love hurt/comfort a little too much 🤭

Homecoming.

Bokuto x Male Reader

-hurt/comfort, temporary split, long distance, pro!Bokuto

-this was requested quite some time ago! So sorry for the wait.

Dating an athlete is not an easy thing to begin with, when it’s a professional, worldwide known athlete.. it only further complicates things.

Being with an athlete you never really know where you are on the priority list with them, this sport is quite literally their life and their job but when does a life partner come into play?

Highschool was a far easier time to date Bokuto, you’d see him in class, during lunch, after school, the weekends- basically anytime you wanted he was there! You even travelled to the different schools and districts with parents, siblings, and other players’ partners for the games.

But, once you graduated it got quite a bit harder.

You were settling into your own education and career, as was he. He was set to become a professional volleyball player like he had always dreamed about and what you had always hoped for him..

That meant long periods away from each other while you both did your own things.

It was steady and you both came out the other side successful and happy,

It wasn’t until he started with MSBY black jackals that there were true signs of trouble. It was getting harder to see eachother, even harder to just get a call or text back from one another because of timezones and offset schedules.

It broke your heart, his too.

There was a promise between you two to stick it out and that you’d always be there for eachother but you just.. weren’t sure of it these days.

It’s been two weeks since you last were able to call Bokuto, 6 months since you last saw him. And texts were far and few.

“What am I supposed to do? We can’t even talk about it because we can’t get in touch, it’s not like I can just catch a plane to see him either..”

You sat across from your childhood friend, Akaashi. He was an editor and basically worked from home so you could call him up whenever.. he was there to listen to all your relationship worries and other worries outside of it.

“You’re both my friend, there’s really nothing I can do or say to help you choose what to do, you know that. He hasn’t been in contact with me for even longer, I’m really no help..”

He mumbled, taking a sip of his drink with a frown. You knew he was right, there really was nothing you could do.. not until you could call him atleast.

—

Bokuto picked up his phone, frowning to see no notifications from you.. quickly he texted you and asked if you could call him later because he would have a gap between training sets.

He was beaming with excitement to finally be able to call you, and he had a surprise too! Quickly he showered and changed into casual clothes before heading out of the gym and off to his apartment..

As soon as he got into his apartment his phone went off, a text from you. With a smile he opened it

‘We need to talk, please make sure you actually have the time to talk this time.”

Tilting his head, he knew he had atleast 3 hours to talk to you and do whatever he needed to get done.. he dialed you, listening to the ringing with a smile

—

You paced the room, flinching when your phone started to vibrate and Bokutos contact came up. Sighing, you answered

“Hey babe! How are you? I miss you!”

“Yeah.. I said we need to talk and I’m gonna cut to the point..”

The visual of his face dropping flashed in your head, the disappointment of no loving greeting in the face of his you imagined.

“Oh! What did you wanna talk about?”

“I think we should split up. Take a break.. or end things entirely..”

The audio seemed like it dropped, complete silence on your boyfriends end..

“Huh?”

“I said we should break up.”

“..why? Did I do something? What’s wrong, what are you talking about?!”

Bokuto panicked on the other side, you bit your lip and tried to find the words

“Please don’t do this, you still love me.. right?”

A sob throbbed in your throat, squeezing your eyes shut the tears started to fall with every single one of his questions

“I do.. I love you so much. I just can’t do this anymore, it’s too hard Bo… I’m sorry, I miss you too much and I can’t keep up with the schedules! I feel like I’m not doing enough for you, and I feel like you’re slipping away from me!”

You whimpered into the phone, Bokutos breathe was heavy in the speaker- evident he was ready to cry too.

“We can make it through this! I promise, once everything settles down-“

“And when would that be?! What if it never settles down? It’s not fair to either of us to keep doing this!”

He cried, your heart shattered hearing him cry.

“I can’t do this without you, I don’t wanna do this without you.. I promise-“

“Just stop.. it’s already hard not doing this in person.. I’m sorry Bokuto. I love you, I miss you.. but I can’t do this anymore.”

“..I love you too! Please, just wait-“

You hung up, not wanting to hear what else he needed to say- you knew it would only make this worse, worse than what it was.

There was never a life you’d envisioned without him in it, you both had the whole future planned out.

It was just too hard, and you accepted the defeat.

But Bokuto wouldn’t.

—

“Woah, what happened to you?”

Atsumu raised a brow at his teammate, Bokuto was known for being a lively and energetic person but right now he looked like a wet bird.. drooping and moping around the gym; his body barely moving through the stretches.

His teammates were even more shocked to see the male ignore them and move to the other side of the gym to continue his stretches.

“Maybe he’s just sad about going home..”

Atsumu shrugged his shoulders. Not giving it much more thought but kept an eye on his teammate..

When practice was over, Bokuto continued to sulk and it got even worse through the scolding he got for appearing lazy in his practice.

“Don’t take it too hard, last practice and you gotta keep yourself from getting hurt before you get back to Y/n, hm~”

Bokuto felt an elbow nudge him in the side, he only glanced over to the yellow blonde.. lip quivering at the mention of you.

“He.. he broke up with me.”

Barely above a whisper, Atsumu went pale- he felt like an ass! Cringing to himself he pulled away and apologized.

“Are.. are uh, you still goin’ home then? You can uh.. come visit my brother with me if you want?”

He didn’t know what to say, it was an extended break for the players so he really wasn’t going to have anyone here to keep him company.. Atsumu also didn’t wanna leave his friend alone so visiting his own family was the only thing that came to mind.

“I’m still going home.. I wanna see him at least one more time, maybe he will change his mind!”

Bokuto perked up, no longer looking as soggy and limp. Atsumu forced a smile and mumbled a ‘yeah, sure!’ And watched the owl-ish man stride out of the gym once again..

He wasn’t going to let you go that easily, with a new determined mind he packed his things and caught the plane home, to you.

—

You sat in your living room, a depressed mess of packaged foods and drinks scattered around where you sat yourself down.. it’d only been maybe a day or two but the radio silence from Bokuto was deafening- not hearing his ringtone or a text notification made you sick- you were always on edge trying to hear if any notifications came. You’d gone longer without a notification but the fact that you probably weren’t going to get one again was hard.

“Why did I do this..”

Wrapping your blanket around yourself, you let yourself fall over onto your side. Tears pricking your eyes once again.

The heartbreak made you ill, your stomach ached and knotted up whenever you tried to move, eat, or even think of doing something. Your head pounded and the anxiety washed the colour out of your skin.. the full body fatigue on top of it all made you feel miserable.

This was harder than anything you had ever had to do.. it took everything in you not to call him or text him.

Sighing, you tried to fall asleep.. as tired as you were the sleep didn’t come easy.

You would try to be a normal person tomorrow, maybe this heartbreak would be easier then.

—

The familiar scents brushed in his nostrils and filled his lungs, with a bright smile he exited the plane and made his way through the airport. Unknowingly, Bokuto has started to look for you; only to upset himself when he remembered you wouldn’t be here. He sighed sadly, hailing a cab that waited on the outskirts of the exit.

You were so close, he needed to prove to you why this would all be worth it and wanted to show you how much he loved you and needs you.

The cab ride was long, almost falling asleep only to be jerked out of it from bumps in the road.

Looking out the window, he saw your town, where you’d be! Excitedly he pointed to your complex to the driver, ready to fish out money from his bag to run into the house as fast as he could.

“You’re from the Jackals right?”

“Mhm!”

“Rides on me, I’ve been rooting for the jackals since I was a teen.”

Bokuto beamed, thanking him profusely and hopping out of the car and dragging his bags behind him.

His heart was beating faster than it ever had, even when doing the miles and miles of running this is the most his chest had hurt.

The man calmed himself down, taking deep breathes to soothe his aching heart. Putting down his bags, he fished around in his pants for the key and unlocked the door quietly; sneaking in and putting his bags behind the door. He looked around, and saw the mess and a lump of blankets and pillows.

Quietly, he stepped towards the lump of blankets and saw tufts of your hair peaking out… his heart swelled and he went to kneel in-front of you, watching your sleeping face.

Lightly tapping your forehead with his finger, he checked to see how deeply you were sleeping.. you didn’t react so he figured he’d be able to pick you up and bring you to the bedroom. He slid his arms under your body and softly lifted you, being mindful of the mess in the room to not make any noise.. he would clean it before he woke you up.

He laid you down on the mattress and tucked you in, making sure you had enough blankets and pillows.. he took off his jacket and placed it on the bed before scurrying out and cleaning the living room- he wasn’t a great cook but he could atleast make sure your snacks were out and organized!

-

You woke with a start, the sunlight from opened curtains dared to blind you for a second.. you were in your room. With a groan you tossed over, hearing something fall off the bed. Sitting up, you looked to the ground to see what had fallen and it was a jacket.

Bokutos jacket.

Furrowing your brows, you tossed your blankets off your body and picked it up.. he hadn’t left this jacket here and you were sure of it, atleast you thought so.. frowning you couldn’t help yourself from hugging it- it smelt strongly of his cologne, did you fish this out last night? Come to think of it you don’t remember making it to your room..

Holding onto the jacket, you walked into the living room and saw your mess was gone.. you also don’t remember cleaning it. That was when you heard someone else walking around in the apartment.

You froze, not wanting to move.. did someone break in?! It’s an apartment complex how the hell-

Arms wrapped around you tightly, a familiar scent and body melted into you.

“You’re awake.”

Tears choked you, are you this delirious and heartbroken to imagine Bokuto?!

Whipping around, you met his face. He was worried, looking almost as if a child that had gotten in trouble..

“How.. how did you get here?!”

He nervously fumbled with the hem of his shirt, avoiding your gaze and mumbling.

“I told you to wait.. but you hung up the phone..”

Huh?

“..was going to surprise you to tell you I was gonna come home.. we got a break and.. then..”

He started to cry, you took him into your arms and let him cry. Bokuto still tried to babble out an explanation, clutching onto the front of your shirt and leaving tear stains on your shoulder.

You began to cry too, hearing him on the phone was heart breaking enough but to hold him and hear it in person shattered you.

Bokuto pulled away, wiping his tears with his arm.

“Do you still want to break up with me? I.. I can get my things and leave…. If that’s what you want..”

He hiccuped, distancing himself from you and getting ready to pack his things up again.

“Don’t go.. let’s talk.”

You hugged him tightly, he returned it with even more force and led you to the couch.

The two of you talked for hours, not even just about the split but about everything.

It was like he never left

It was like nothing had ever happened.

As the day grew into night, you found him cuddling you and sitting on your lap.

You kissed him, the two of you kissed for what felt like minutes but what hours.

When he pulled away with slightly bruised lips, his hair and face dropped- a frown glossing his lips

“Is this a goodbye? Is this it?”

Rubbing circles on his hips, you pecked his lips again.

“No, of course not. I would’ve been gone and taken my own things if I didn’t want to see you again..”

He perked up, a smile twitching at the corners of his mouth

“We.. we are back together?”

“Yeah..”

He began to shake, catching your lips with his and pressing into you.

“I’m taking you with me, everywhere now. I can provide fully, take your education and job on the road with me! I can’t leave you again!”

“We’ll talk about it.. let’s just enjoy your time here..”

Bokuto smiled brightly, leaving kisses all over your face and thanking you.

“We’ll make it, I promise!”

“I know.”

[physalian]

What No One Tells You About Writing #5

Part 4

Part 3

Part 2

Shorter list this time, but longer points. I expect this one to be more divisive, but it is what it is, and this is what ‘no one tells you’ about writing, after all. This one’s all about feedback and how to take it, and give it.

1. Not everyone will like your book, no matter how good it is

I’ve said this before, granted, but sometimes you can have very arbitrary reasons for not liking an otherwise great story. For example: I refuse to watch Hamilton. Why? Because everyone I knew and their dog was trying to cram it down my throat when it came out and I still don’t really like musicals, and didn’t appreciate the bombardment of insisting I’ll like it simply because everyone else does. I’m sure it’s great! I’m just not watching it until I want to watch it.

It can be other reasons, too. I won’t read fanfic that’s written in first person, doesn’t matter how good it is. Someone might not watch a TV show because the primary cast is white or not-white. Someone might not watch a movie because an actor they despise is in it, even if the role is fantastic. Someone might not watch or read a story that’s too heavy on the romance, or not enough, or too explicit. I went looking for beta readers and came across one who wouldn’t touch a book where the romance came secondary in a sci-fi or fantasy novel. Kept on scrolling.

Someone can just think your side character is unfunny and doesn’t hear the same music as everyone else. Someone can just not like your writing style with either too much or not enough fluff, or too much personality in the main narrator. Or they have triggers that prevent them from enjoying it the way you intend.

How someone expresses that refusal is not your job to manage. You cannot force someone to like your work and pushing too hard will just make it worse. Some people just won’t like it, end of story.

2. Criticism takes a very long time to take well

Some people are just naturally better at taking constructive criticism, some have a thick skin, some just have a natural confidence that beats back whatever jabs the average reader or professional editor can give. If you’re like me, you might’ve physically struggled at first to actually read the feedback and insisted that your beta readers color-coded the positive from the negative.

It can be a very steep climb up the mountain until you reach a point where you know you’re good enough, and fully appreciate that it is actually “constructive” and anything that isn’t, isn’t worth your time.

The biggest hurdle I had to climb was this: A criticism of my work is not a criticism of me as a person.

Yes, my characters are built with pieces of my personality and worldview and dreams and ideals, but the people giving you feedback should be people who either already know you as a person and are just trying to help, or are people you pay to be unbiased and only focus on what’s on the page.

Some decisions, like a concerning moral of your story, is inadvertently a criticism of your own beliefs—like when I left feedback that anxiety can’t just be loved away and believing so is a flawed philosophy. I did that with intent to help, not because I thought the writer incompetent or that they wrote it in bad faith.

I’m sure it wasn’t a fun experience reading what I had to say, either. It’s not fun when I get told a character I love and lost sleep over getting right isn’t getting the same reception with my betas. But they’re all doing it (or at least they all should be doing it) from a place of just wanting to help, not to insult your writing ability. Even if your writing objectively sucks, you’re still doing a lot more just by putting words on paper than so many people who can’t bring themselves to even try.

As with all mediums subjects to critique, one need not be an author to still give valuable feedback. I’m not a screenwriter, but from an audience’s standpoint, I can tell you what I think works. Non-authors giving you pointers on the writing process? You can probably ignore that. Non-authors giving you pointers on how your character lands? Then, yeah, they might have an opinion worth considering.

3. Parsing out the “constructive” from the criticism isn’t easy

This goes for people giving it as well. Saying things like “this book sucks” is an obviously useless one. Saying “I didn’t like this story because it was confusing and uncompelling” is better. “I think this story was confusing and uncompelling because of X, and I have some suggestions here that I think can make it better.”

Now we’re talking.

Everyone’s writing style is different. Some writers like a lot of fluff and poetic prose to immerse you in the details and the setting, well beyond what you need to understand the scene or the plot. Their goal is to make this world come alive and help you picture the scene exactly the way they see it in their minds.

There’s writers who are very light on the sensory fluff and poetry, trying to give you the impression of what the scene should look and feel like and letting you fill in the missing pieces with your own vision.

Or there’s stories that take a long time to get anywhere, spending many pages on the small otherwise insignificant slice-of-life details as opposed to laser-precision on the plot, and those who trim off all the fat for a fast-paced rollercoaster.

None of these are inherently bad or wrong, but audiences do have their preferences.

The keyword in “constructive criticism” is “construct”. As in, your advice is useless if you can’t explain why you think an element needs work. “It’s just bad” isn’t helpful to anyone.

When trying to decide if feedback has merit, try to look at whatever the critic gives you and explain what they said to yourself in your own words. If you think changing the piece in question will enhance your story or better convey what you’re trying to say, it’s probably solid advice.

Sometimes you just have to throw the whole character out, or the whole scene, whole plot line and side quest. Figuring out what you can salvage just takes time, and practice.

4. Just when you think you’re done, there’s more

There’s a quote out there that may or may not belong to Da Vinci that goes “art is never finished, only abandoned.” Even when you think your book is as good as it can be, you can still sleep on it and second-guess yourself and wonder if something about it could have been done better or differently.

There is such a thing as too much editing.

But it also takes a long time to get there. Only 10-15% of writing is actually penning the story. The rest is editing, agonizing over editing, re-editing, and staring at the same few lines of dialogue that just aren't working to the point that you dream about your characters.

It can get demoralizing fast when you think you’ve fixed a scene, get the stamp of approval from one reader, only for the next one to come back with valid feedback neither of you considered before. So you fix it again. And then there’s another problem you didn’t consider. And then you’re juggling all these scene bits and moments you thought were perfect, only for it to keep collapsing.

It will get there. You will have a manuscript you’re proud of, even if it’s not the one you thought you were going to write. My newest book isn’t what I set out to write, but if I stuck to that original idea, I never would have let it become the work that it is.

5. “[Writing advice] is more like guidelines than actual rules.”

Personally, I think there’s very few universal, blanket pieces of writing advice that fit every book, no exceptions, no conditions, no questions asked. Aside from: Don’t sacrifice a clear story for what you think is cool, but horribly confusing.

For example, I’m American, but I like watching foreign films from time to time. The pacing and story structure of European films can break so many American rules it’s astonishing. Pacing? What pacing? It’s ~fancy~. It wants to hang on a shot of a random wall for fifteen seconds with no music and no point because it’s ~artsy~. Or there is no actual plot, or arc, it’s just following these characters around for 90 minutes while they do a thing. The entire movie is basically filler. Or the ending is deeply unsatisfying because the hoity-toity filmmaker believes in suffering for art or… something.

That doesn’t fly with mainstream American audiences. We live, breathe, and die on the Hero’s Journey and expect a three-act-structure with few novel exceptions.

That does not mean your totally unique or subversive plot structure is wrong. So much writing advice I’ve found is solid advice, sure, but it doesn’t often help me with the story I’m writing. I don’t write romance like the typical romance you’d expect (especially when it comes to monster allegories). There’s some character archetypes I just can’t write and refuse to include–like the sad, abusive, angsty, 8-pack abs love interest, or the comedic relief.

Beyond making sure your audience can actually understand what you’re trying to say, both because you want your message to be received, and you don’t want your readers to quit reading, there is an audience for everything, and exceptions to nearly every rule, even when it comes to writing foundations like grammar and syntax.

You don’t even have to put dialogue in quotes. (Be advised, though, that the more ~unique~ your story is, the more likely you are to only find success in a niche audience).

Lots of writing advice is useful. Lots of it is contradictory. Lots of it is outdated because audience expectations are changing constantly. There is a balance between what you *should* do as said by other writers, and what you think is right for your story, regardless of what anyone else says.

Just don’t make it confusing.

—

I just dropped my cover art and summary for my debut novel. Go check it out and let me know what you think!

[tobiasdrake]

Digimon Adventure 02x17 - Odaiba Memorial / Ghost of a Chance

Previously on Digimon Adventure: Iori nearly got all of his friends killed, argued with them relentlessly, disobeyed his grandfather, defrauded school officials, and operated a motor vehicle while underage. Thus earning him accreditation for upstanding moral virtue and social responsibility.

You know, I thought this episode was way later in the series. Huh.

We open this episode with a timestamp placing today as July 30th. The famous Fuji Broadcasting Center or FCG Building has been reconstructed three years after its famous observation deck was used to punt Vamdemon in the nuts. Inside, Chioka from Ishida Hiroaki's crew in the first series is working on a show along with a nameless video editor.

On the computer screen, they're going over footage of a woman nearly being hit by a swooping bird.

Chioka: Ah, right there! Put this shot right after the panning shot. Editor: (teasing) Chioka-chan, did you say an exorcism rite for this footage? Chioka: Uh, no? Why do you ask? Editor: (teasing) Strange things often happen with these sorts of mystery shows.... Chioka: Strange things? Editor: Like ghosts appearing on the tape and stuff. Chioka: Ahaha! As if something like that would happen on a show like-- (gasp) Editor: Huh? What's up?

Editor, who had been focusing on Chioka instead of the footage, looks up to see what's so shocking. In the corner of the footage, a mysterious shadow with clearly discernable eyes can be seen. Both men let out sharp gasps of shock.

The particular type of spooker that Editor tries to scare Chioka with is 幽霊 yuurei. This is an umbrella category; There's a wide variety of spooky things that can be considered 幽霊 yuurei, but they are flavors of your classical ghosty; The souls of deceased humans lingering in the living world, or that come and go from this one and the beyond.

Supernatural entities like 化け物 bakemono often get translated as "ghost" which misses some important nuance. But this one really is just "ghost".

The dub cuts out the part of the footage showing the "July 30th" timestamp.

Chioka: And here we go! (Footage of swooping bird) Chioka: Awesome! My new TV show "When Parakeets Attack" will be a smash hit! Editor: (disinterested) Yeah, yeah, whatever. Did you check the camera before you filmed this footage? Chioka: Of course! I'm a professional. Editor: Okay, then what the heck is that shadow!?

The dub cuts the following shots of Chioka and Editor facing the camera and chatting, probably because Chioka's smoking in them. One of the cut shots is even a closeup on his cigarette pack labeled, in English, "Gaster Hard --" with his hand covering the rest.

Instead, we go straight to the ominous shadow and both men freaking out.

July 31st. The Chosen Children return from the Digital World, reappearing in Computer Club after another successful day of battling the Digimon Kaiser.

Chibimon: (stomach gurgle) I'm starving! Hikari: (laughing) We just got home and you're already hungry? Chibimon: I can't help it! I'm really hungry! Takeru: Well, we reclaimed an area today so we deserve a snack! Miyako: Bingo! I just bought a new game. You guys want to come over and play it? Daisuke: (psyched) Wait, what? What did you buy?

Daisuke is so down for playing games with his team. He, Takeru, and Miyako are all in good spirits, but Hikari notices that Iori seems bothered.

Hikari: What's wrong, Iori-kun? Iori: I was just thinking that we still don't know what the Digimon Kaiser's been doing lately. Takeru: Now that you mention it, that's true. He's still expanding his territory, but he hasn't really done anything else. Daisuke: Don't worry about it! We've got the upper hand! Miyako: (nods) Mhm!

In what way do we have the upper hand? Even if all he's doing is expanding his territory, which is not correct, he still has more time to put up Towers than we have to knock them down.

The dub again cuts out the part of the footage showing the "July 31st" timestamp.

DemiVeemon: Time for a snaaa~aaack! Kari: Ahaha, is that all you can think about? Food? DemiVeemon: Traveling to and from the Digital World can work up quite an appetite. T.K.: He's right! We deserve to celebrate for our latest victory over the Digimon Emperor! Yolei: Pizza! I heard there's a rad new place down by the beach. Let's get a lunch! Davis: Half-anchovies, half-mustard. Kari: Cody, what's the matter? Cody: Nothing. i'm just not sure it's time to celebrate when we don't know what the Digimon Emperor is up to. T.K.: Maybe Cody's right. We should probably hold off on the pizza until we can figure out our next plan of attack. Davis: Come on, T.K.! You know we can't fight him on an empty stomach! Yolei: (nods) Yeah! Yeah!

Miyako's new game is replaced by a beachside pizza restaurant. Also, in the original, Iori and Takeru were merely perturbed by the lack of information regarding the Kaiser; They didn't go so far as to oppose the victory celebration.

Iori: But we won't be able to use this classroom anymore, starting tomorrow, right? Miyako: Huh? Why's that? Takeru: Oh, that's right! They're going to be holding summer computer classes for the students in the low grades.

For clarity, he means students in like 1st through 3rd grade, not students with poor grades. English!

Also, how rude. What do the administration think this is, a classroom!? We're trying to run a cross-dimensional guerilla war here! The nerve.

Daisuke: Ehh!? I never heard about that! Miyako: So then we can't go to the Digital World tomorrow? Takeru: Uh, well.... Miyako: Hm? Takeru: ...we already have plans for tomorrow, so we wouldn't be able to make it anyway. Daisuke: (suspicious) "We"? Who's "we"? Hikari: Me and Takeru-kun. Daisuke: GCK!!!

Daisuke is so mortified by that answer that his face distends into a comical caricature. With a huge shit-eating grin, Miyako turns around to enjoy the destruction of Daisuke's universe.

Between Daisuke's huge reaction and Hikari clearly playing this up to fuck with him, it's Miyako who got the big laugh out of me. XD She might as well be munching popcorn right now.

Daisuke: W-What do y-you mean? L-Like a d-d-date!? Hikari: (laughing) It's nothing like that!

Hikari shows the new kids her planner. On Thursday 8/1, she's redundantly written in red pen, "8/1 計画". Translator's note: 計画 Keikaku means "Plan".

Also, though I can't make out her 8/5 entry very well, I'm pretty sure her 8/7 with the happy smiley face is プール Puuru, or "Pool". Which absolutely warrants a happy smiley face.

Daisuke: One-eighths Plan? What's that? Takeru: That's "August 1st Plan". Also, if you were going to read it like that, wouldn't it be "Eight-oneths Plan"? Iori: That's for sure. Group: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Daisuke: Who cares! So what if I'm bad at fractions!

Everyone has a good laugh at Daisuke's expense. I would defend him by again pointing out the awkward redundancy of Hikari writing the date in but reading it as 1/8 is completely indefensible. XD

Takeru: (getting serious) Why don't you guys come too? Daisuke: Huh!? On your date? Hikari: (laughing) That's not what it is! Daisuke: (half-crying) Then what is it!?

The date of the wedding, Daisuke; They've actually been dating for months and you just didn't notice.

In the dub:

Cody: But starting tomorrow, we won't be able to use this classroom. Yolei: What? Why not? T.K.: Oh yeah, that's right! The detention room has been moved here and all the bad kids will be put in the computer lab. Davis: Hey! We're not all bad!

Even though summer school is a thing in the U.S., the dub opts for this detention bit.

Yolei: How can we go tomorrow if we can't access the computer lab!? T.K.: Wait a sec! Yolei: Hmm? T.K.: We can't go into the Digital World tomorrow anyway! I almost forgot we have big plans! Davis: What plans!? What do you mean, "We"? Kari: He means plans with me, Davis. Davis: DAHHHHHHH!!!! Are you two t-talking ab-bout a date together? Kari: Ahaha, of course not, silly! (Kari shows her planner) Davis: You guys have a date to do fractions!? What gives!? T.K.: No, Davis; That's a date, not a fraction. Tomorrow marks the anniversary of when the DigiDestined defeated Myotismon!

It does not. 08/01 is the date that the Chosen Children/DigiDestined first entered the Digital World. Vamdemon/Myotismon was killed on 08/03.

Cody: Davis thought it was a fraction! Group: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Davis: Well, how should I know they started putting math in calendars!? T.K.: Come on, Davis. Do you want to come with us? Davis: On your date!? Kari: (laughing) I told you, it's not a date! Davis: Do you promise, Kari?

The dub takes its first commercial break here.

The jokes don't hit as hard in this version. They get as far as "Davis thinks the date is a fraction", but he doesn't read it out incorrectly as 1/8 and get dunked on for it so the gag isn't quite as strong. Though the "putting math in calendars" bit is a strong punchline, so it gets points back for that.

But also, Davis's final line is delivered in a neutral voice, whereas Daisuke's voice is quivering on the verge of tears. Without the big reaction, it's not as funny.

One day later. August 1st, 2002. An establishing shot shows us where the children are meeting, though if you aren't familiar with the geography, the meaning might not be as immediately clear. They're in a grassy diamond-shaped artificial landmass just a short skip across the Tokyo Bay from the FCG Building, overlooked by the Rainbow Bridge.

Map Time! We haven't gotten to do one of these since Vamdemon died. Since the red tick on this map is the FCG Building, that places them here, which should be startlingly familiar to everyone who went through the other Map Time segments with me.

The Chosen Children are meeting at Daiba Park, the very place that Vamdemon fortified as his base of operations three years ago. This reunion is being held on the closest clear geographical landmark you could visit to dance on his grave.

Takeru: It was three years ago on August 1st, in the summer of 1999. Iori: Oh, I get it. That was the day Taichi-san and the others were first taken to the Digital World. Hikari: I was stuck at home, though. Takeru: Hikari-chan had to miss camp because she was sick that day. Patamon: That was when Takeru and I first met! Miyako: I see!

On this important day, it's story time for the junior team.

In the dub, we once again skip over the timestamp as we return from commercial.

T.K.: I can't believe it's already been four years since we went into the Digital World. It seems like yesterday. Cody: I can't imagine being at summer camp one second, then in another dimension the next! That sure beats canoeing and archery any day! Kari: I was sick, so I missed camp that summer. T.K.: I almost forgot! You weren't there the first time we saw all the weird stuff. Patamon: Wait a sec! You guys looked pretty weird to us, you know. Yolei: I guess!

Solid. This exchange is very different but it still covers the key points.

Suddenly, a voice calls out to the group.

Taichi: HEY!!! Daisuke: Ah! It's Taichi-san-tachi and the others!

The other six veterans have all arrived at Daiba Park. In fact, even Mimi is here! And she's let her hair go back to its natural brown and brought her old cowboy styles and hat.

Taichi: You guys came too! Daisuke: Yep! Miyako: Mimi-san! Mimi: Hi! Jou: How are you guys? Sora: It's been too long since we were all together like this. Iori: Oh wow! Takeru: That's right. Today is our anniversary.

As much of the anniversary is spent reminiscing about the first series, the narrator comes in to skim over it. Eleven Chosen Children find a nice shady spot under a tree to go over old memories and tell the new kids all about their experience together.

Narrator: For these children, that day was the beginning of a long yet short journey that they would never forget. The three of them, Daisuke and the others, had only ever heard bits and pieces about past events in the Digital World. But today, everyone shared their stories with them. Daisuke: What, that's what happened!? I can't believe it.... Miyako: You really are something else, Mimi-oneesama! Iori: I see. So that's what brought Takeru-san and Hikari-san to where they are now. Narrator: And yet, there were still too many battles and adventures to relate in a single day.

Yeah, you'd probably need about 54 episodes of television to really do it justice.

Daisuke is listening intently and ravenously consuming information. Miyako is worshipping Mimi again so hard that she actually says oneesama out loud when she normally keeps that tucked away in her internal monologue. And Iori is using this as a way to better understand Takeru and Hikari specifically.

In the dub:

Tai: Hey! Davis: Look, it's Tai and the whole gang! Tai: Happy anniversary, guys! Davis: Hey! Yolei: Mimi! Mimi: Hi! Joe: Wow, what a reunion! Sora: It has been a long time since we've all been together. Cody: No kidding! T.K.: Yeah, think about it. There's enough of us here to start our own soccer league!

In place of the narrator, we get to hear some of the reminiscing directly.

Tai: So you see, not all of the corrupted Digimon we encountered were, in fact, bad. They were just under the influence of the evil Black Gears. Sora: But we found out we could destroy the Black Gears with our Digivices and freed them from their spell. They became good friends and eventually helped us defeat the four Dark Masters. Davis: Geeze, those Dark Masters sound like my math teacher! Yolei: They should make a movie out of this story! Cody: I hope these grass stains will come out of my clothes or else my mom will ground me. Tai: You guys have to stick together no matter what. Remember that friendship is the key or you'll all be toast!

Not to Um Actually but Um Actually friendship is only one of eight keys. Sorry, Tai. :P

This serves to give us a brief slice of what's still implied to be an overall sharing of the experiences of the past. I like the decision to center that slice on Devimon and the Black Gears, as that's the part of the first series that's most relevant to what the junior team's going through with the Evil Rings and Evil Spirals.

It's nice to actually hear some of the sharing rather than having the narrator dryly exposit, "And then they told the junior team some stuff. Next scene."

...but it comes at the cost of Daisuke, Miyako, and Iori's well-characterized reactions to hearing the story as a whole. Davis makes a shallow quip, Yolei makes the same obvious joke that I did a moment ago, and Cody isn't even paying attention at all. That sucks.

Across the bay in the FCG Building, Chioka and Editor are still trying to figure out what's wrong with their footage.

They play the video and the shadow passes across the bottom of the screen, from right to left. They rewind the footage and play it again and, this time the shadow dashes from the bottom left corner to the top right.

Editor: (frustrated) It changed again! This is definitely bizarre! If it was recorded on the tape, there's no reason it would change every time it's played! Chioka: (distraught) And this is my first time getting to be director too....

Poor Chioka. Figuring correctly that the video isn't responsible, they make for the broadcasting control room where similar shadows are visible on every screen.

Editor: Here too. Chioka: It's not just our show. Editor: The whole station is.... Chioka: The station is what? Editor: Cursed. Chioka: Don't be stupid! They just rebuilt this place! All the equipment is brand new, so... (nervous) So....

Chioka trails off.

He makes a decent point. Generally speaking, for something to be cursed, it needs to have been around long enough for some sort of strong feeling or grudge to have developed around it. Because the FCG Building was leveled three years ago, the building is new and the equipment is new so what curse could any of it be afflicted by?

Well, the familiar shape of that shadow might give the game away to the audience.

In the dub:

Editor: There it is! (Rewind the footage and the shadow moves differently) Editor: There it is again! This is absolutely impossible. I've watched this stupid tape fifty times and every time, that shadow does something completely different! I give up. Chioka: And this was my first time as a director.... (Broadcasting room) Editor: Take a look at those monitors. See? It's not just us! That creepy shadow is on every program on this TV station! Chioka: And you've checked for technical difficulties? Editor: This isn't technical, boss. Chioka: Then what is it, smart guy? Editor: A ghost. Chioka: How am I supposed to tell my boss that I can't get my show on the air because of a ghost!? (worried) They'll can me for sure... I should have listened to my mother and gone to accounting school....

...your boss is probably vividly aware of the eerie shadow showing up on every single program being broadcast, Chioka. I don't think they'll hold the station-wide broadcasting error against you.

The dub leaves out the part where this is a new building with new equipment. It's possible they didn't see the relevancy, or they just liked their "But my boss!" gag better.

Evening falls over Daiba Park. The Chosen Children watch a ferry pass, heading for the Rainbow Bridge.

Mimi: What's wrong with you three? Iori: We're overwhelmed after hearing so many stories at once. Miyako: It feels like my stomach is overstuffed.... Daisuke: I don't think I can listen to anymore. Sora: (teasing) Already? You're not that soft, are you? Taichi: Now it's your turn to put in the work, right? Daisuke: (embarrassed) I guess so.... Yamato: Will you be okay? Miyako: (downtrodden) Probably not. Jou: Well, just hang in there!

Jou gives Daisuke an encouraging pat on the back. Too hard. Jou smacks him so hard that Daisuke nearly topples over the truly terrible fence that seems custom-made for tripping. Nobody helps him and everyone laughs instead.

Eh, y'know, falling into the Tokyo Bay "builds character", I suppose. :P At least Miyako and Iori actually look worried for him.

In the dub:

Cody: That's an incredible story. I must admit, I'm a little afraid we can't live up to the achievements of you original DigiDestined. Yolei: We wouldn't be here if we couldn't handle it! Davis: What she said! I'm ready to fight right here right now! Sora: (sarcastic) Davis, you're so brave. Tai: (sincere) That's the spirit, Davis! Take no prisoners! Davis: (embarrassed) Oh-ho-ho, yeah? Matt: Can the rest of you handle it? Yolei: (downtrodden) I'm not sure.... Joe: Just follow Davis! (Joe nearly pushes Davis in the water)

The original script is a lot more humanized, with the new kids expressing their human fragility against the encouragement of the veterans. The dub version is just a big Ra-Ra Let's Go moment dominated by Davis's machismo.

I'm not sure why Sora delivers her line in a patronizing tone.

As the team goes their separate ways for the night, Takeru goes home with Yamato. He steps into the Ishida apartment with Patamon clutched in his arms and a wide-eyed smile on his face.

Takeru: It's been so long! And it's... as messy as ever. Yamato: It can't be helped. Two guys live here.

As Yamato suggests, this apartment lives down to stereotypes. There's dirty dishes left sitting on the table and discarded clothes on the floor.

Takeru sets down Patamon and kneels down, picking up the clothes off the floor.

Takeru: I can help with the laundry-- Yamato: Stop fussing over it!

Yamato yanks the dirty clothes out of Takeru's hands.

Yamato: You said this same thing when you came over three years ago, remember? Takeru: Eh? I did? Three years ago... the day we left for camp? Yamato: I remember thinking, "Mom must do this stuff for him all the time. His room's probably always clean, his clothes are freshly washed, and when he comes home each day, there's a meal waiting for him on the table." Takeru: Sorry... I never really thought about that.... Yamato: It's okay. You shouldn't have to think too much about it.

Yamato takes the dirty clothes offscreen to put them away. In a hamper or laundry machine or... I'm not really sure.

Yamato: Well, since you came all the way here, maybe we should find someone to come by to clean up and do the laundry. Takeru: Like Mom! Yamato: Haha she would kill me!

Yamato laughs off the suggestion, but Takeru looks down at the floor, sincerely disappointed that they aren't inviting Natsuko into this sleepover. He says nothing, but the camera focuses for a moment on Patamon silently looking up at him. A moment of silent sympathy.

Yamato is absolutely correct, though. If they called Natsuko to come clean up Hiroaki's apartment, no one would ever find Hiroaki and Yamato's bodies. XD

We haven't seen much of Takeru and Natsuko's home life but we did get a glimpse of it in the first episode. Natsuko's a busy woman. We don't know how much Takeru cooks, cleans, and looks after himself, but he at least put his dishes in the sink which is more than Yamato and Hiroaki are doing for themselves.

The opinion Yamato expresses here is a reflection of how he used to view Takeru. It says more about the way Yamato used to think about Takeru than about Takeru and Natusko's relationship. By his admission, Takeru tried to do back then the same thing he's doing now: Offering to help pick up the house for Yamato and Hiroaki.

But Yamato just felt criticized by a spoiled child of privilege. Because it was important to his self-identity back then that he view Takeru as helpless. Takeru can't be someone who can tidy up and clean; He must just be being taken care of by Natsuko and that's why he's questioning the state of the apartment.

Takeru's behavior hasn't changed. What's changed is how Yamato perceives it. But he still isn't going to let Takeru spend all night cleaning his apartment. Are you shitting me? No.

Bestie's little sister does this same fucking thing. Comes over and immediately starts looking for chores she can do. I don't know why little siblings are like this.

In the dub:

T.K.: I haven't been here in a while! Iiiiiit's... the same. Including the smell of your socks.

Perfect delivery. A+

Matt: What are you talking about? I just finished cleaning the place! T.K.: I see.... (T.K. kneels down and picks up discarded laundry) T.K.: (laughing) And how long have these been here? (Matt yanks the clothes away) Matt: Quit nitpicking, T.K.! Dad's been putting in a lot of hours at the TV station and I've been rehearsing with my band! T.K.: Oh. Sorry. I almost forgot it's just you two guys. Matt: Don't worry about it. You're right, this place does have a distinct odor to it. Those dishes are so filthy, I think I'd rather face the Dark Masters again than clean them. If Mom lived with me, she'd never let this mess happen. She always kept us in line. T.K.: Yeah. She cracks the whip on me! Matt: Anyway, I'm starving. What do you want to eat? And don't expect anything fancy 'cause we haven't gone grocery shopping in quite a while.... T.K.: Anything will be fine. Matt: Okay, but I warned you! (T.K. looks down, disappointed)

Where Yamato and Takeru spend their dialogue reminiscing about the past, Matt and T.K. are more focused on the present state of the apartment and why it's like this.

The dub script doesn't explain why T.K. suddenly gets sad. In the original, it's simple. He's young, he wants to spend time with his whole family together in one place, and the unlikelihood of ever doing that again depresses him. Takeru is a child of divorce and he carries that weight on his shoulders.

In the dub, the next section about dinner starts a couple lines early. I guess T.K.'s unhappy about the poor menu options?

Yamato returns from putting away the laundry.

Yamato: What do you want to eat? I'm going to be the one making it, so don't expect too much. Takeru: (perks up) Anything will be fine as long as it's a home-cooked meal by my Onii-chan! Yamato: (wicked grin) Oh, is that right? Then prepare yourself.

Smash cut to the end of dinner. Takeru drops his spoon into his empty curry bowl and inhales a glass of water before choking out the customary Japanese phrase to conclude a meal. It seems the curry he just ate was unbelievably spicy.

Takeru: (finishes water) NYAGH!!! Yamato: Hahahahaha! Takeru: G-Gouchisousama! Dad always eats like this!? Yamato: No, to honor our guest Takeru-sama, this was a Special Dinner.

"Special Dinner" is in English.

Takeru: Special!? The normal one would have been fine.... Yamato: That wouldn't be right. This only happens one night out of every year. It's just like Orihime and Hikoboshi on Tanabata. Takeru: (facepalm) Orihime and HIkoboshi would be furious if they heard that.

Yamato and Takeru are referring to a Japanese holiday they borrowed from China. It's based on a popular story about a pair of star-crossed lovers separated by Orihime's father who can only meet one day out of every year. That one day when the lovers can meet has been a real-world holiday in China and Japan for well over a thousand years.

In the dub, the boys have already begun discussing dinner.

Matt: First, I'll take a little stroll to our old refrigerator and, uh... Take a peek at what's not expired. T.K.: (perks up) I have an idea. Why don't we just order a pizza? I'll buy! Matt: (wicked grin) I've got an idea. A real hot one! (Smash cut to empty curry bowl and T.K. inhaling water) Matt: Ahahahahahahahaha! T.K.: Quick, call 9-1-1! Or the Poison Center! I'm gonna pass out! Matt: I thought I told you, "Eat at your own risk." But you said you were hungry! T.K.: Are you crazy!? What is this stuff!? Matt: It's a secret, but I'll tell you: A little bit of hot sauce, a little wasabi, and a mystery meat I found in the refrigerator covered in green fuzz! T.K.: (facepalm) Oh man, I never thought cooking could make you feel dizzy....

Obviously, the Tanabata stuff wasn't making it over. We do lose Yamato asserting that Takeru only gets to sleep over once a year. The boys are still as estranged by the divorce as they were in the first series.

That's a minor background detail that I like. Even after everything that happened in the first series, Yamato and Takeru's living situations haven't changed. Hiroaki and Natsuko went through a mutual terrifying experience with their children during Vamdemon's invasion of Odaiba, and they were visibly supporting each other when the Chosen Children returned to the Digital World and fought Apocalymon.

But once those events ended... They went right back to business as usual. Hiroaki and Natsuko divorced for a reason. They are never, ever getting back together. Sorry, Takeru, but it's true. And that's neat. It's rare to see stories commit to a divorce.

But the dialogue that replaces all of that is charming, goofy, and likable too. Some solid brotherly banter in this scene.

Suddenly, the door opens and closes.

Takeru: Ah! He's home!

Hiroaki comes down the hall, entering the apartment's dining area.

Takeru: Welcome home! Hiroaki: Oh, you're here? So that was today then.... Yamato: What, did you forget? Hiroaki: No, no, you're right, it's today....

Hiroaki slumps down in his chair and lets out a hard sigh. His uneaten Special Dinner curry set out on the plate in front of him. Waiting. Lurking.

Takeru: What is it? Did something happen? Hiroaki: No, it's nothing....

Hiroaki lets out another sigh and holds his head in his hands. He is clearly upset about something.

Yamato: Okay, what's with the eerie noises? Hiroaki: Eerie? Yes. You're right. It's eerie. I don't want to think about it but no matter what, I just can't get these eerie things out of my head. Yamato: What are you talking about?

Hiroaki stands up and slowly walks across the room with his arms slumped down, like a shambling corpse.

Hiroaki: If you saw someone walking down the hall like this, what would you think? Yamato: (dismissive) Probably just something like "Where is he going?" Hiroaki: That's right! That's what you'd think. So then you watch them to see what they're going. And then.... Yamato: And then...? Hiroaki: In the hallway where you thought someone was walking, there's nobody there. Takeru: So you thought you saw someone at first, but you were just seeing things? Hiroaki: (unconvinced) Yeah... Seeing things....

Probably just old age. Or ghosts. It's a proven scientific fact that ghosts exist and that they come out of the wifi network. And also draculas. Which I would have lost money on if we'd been betting on how ghosts and draculas work but that's life.

In the dub:

(Door opens and closes) T.K.: Oh! Dad must be home. Hey, Dad! Hiroaki: Hey, T.K. Hey, Matt. Sorry I'm late again. Matt: Another tough day at the TV station? Hiroaki: It's always tough but lately it's been just brutal. (Hiroaki slumps into his chair in front of the murderous curry) T.K.: Dad, what's the matter? Hiroaki: Ugh, I don't even know how to explain it. Matt: Don't tell me Myotismon destroyed the station again. Hiroaki: Ha! I almost wish! At least then I would have an answer for what's going on! My staff is quitting every hour saying they're seeing strange things and I don't blame them! I must be losing my mind.... Matt: What's happening, Dad? Hiroaki: Okay.... (Hiroaki gets up and shambles like a zombie) Hiroaki: One second you're walking down the hall and you see something moving out of the corner of your eye. Takeru: That doesn't sound too crazy so far. Hiroaki: Right! But when you turn to look, nothing! Not a trace of anyone or anything! Just an empty hallway. Yamato: So what? Hiroaki: It might sound crazy but I've come to a conclusion. The station is haunted! T.K.: Are you sure you're not just overtired? You have been putting in a lot of hours lately. Hiroaki: I know. But it's more than that.

They remove the part where Hiroaki's surprised by Takeru's presence and add in T.K. being pretty knowledgeable about Hiroaki's recent working hours. Coupled with the rewrites in the previous part and it seems pretty clear to me that they're trying to scrub out Takeru and Yamato's estrangement.

I guess they just didn't like the plot point of Takeru only staying here on the Adventure anniversary and want him to be a regular guest of Hiroaki's home.

Also of note is that when Hiroaki shambles across the room, he now seems to be describing himself walking down the hall instead of describing the person he saw.

Hiroaki: Oh... So what do you think of this? While I'm editing, I see a shadow on the screen that shouldn't be there. Yamato: Maybe no one noticed it during filming. Hiroaki: Oh? Is that right? Takeru: What else could it be? Hiroaki: Yeah, sure. That'd be nice. Takeru: What, a ghost did it? Hiroaki: That's right. If one or two people saw it, we could just assume they're seeing things. But when it's ten or twenty people....

The boys have no answer to that.

In the dub:

Hiroaki: For instance, there's this dark shadow. It keeps appearing on every monitor in the station but it's different every single time. Matt: I bet it's just the equipment. It probably needs to be cleaned. Hiroaki: I know. I thought of that. T.K.: Wow, that's pretty weird! Hiroaki: You're telling me. ...maybe it is stress. T.K.: Well, what are you gonna do? Hiroaki: I dunno. Maybe I'll go on a vacation. I heard the Arctic is a nice place to visit. I haven't taken one in fifteen years.

In both version, Matt makes counterarguments that the discovery scene with Chioka already answered in the Japanese script. It's not a filming error because the shadow changes every time and it's not the equipment because it's all brand new stuff straight out of the box.

Hiroaki's reply doesn't really answer either concern. He basically just goes "Nuh uh!" in both versions so it's unsurprising that Yamato/Matt isn't taking this seriously.

Dub Hiroaki is more willing to accept that he might be delusional. Original Hiroaki makes the salient point that other people are seeing this shit too so there's no way the problem is just him.

Though there is another possibility nobody points out and it's that the newly reconstructed FCG building might have a gas leak. A mass hallucination is possible if there's something bad in the air, and they should probably evacuate the building and call someone to look at it.

It's at this point that the boys notice Hiroaki brought home a Sony Sonic portable MiniDisc player.

Takeru: Hey dad, what's that MD? Hiroaki: Oh, Sakurada made me a copy of his sutra. Boys: A sutra!? Hiroaki: Well, with some kind of bakemono going around, I thought this would help. But it hasn't done anything! Yamato: (irritated) This is so dumb.

Yamato gets up and leaves the table, unwilling to participate in this conversation any longer.

Takeru: Oh, that's right! I wanted to take a bath.

Takeru more politely excuses himself but he quits the conversation too, leaving Hiroaki alone in the living room. Hiroaki sits back down at the table.

Hiroaki: Well, guess I'll have dinner, then.

He takes one bite of the Special Dinner and his face turns bright red. Cut to exterior shot of the apartment as he screams in agony.

Hiroaki: HOT!!! IT'S SO HOT!!!

Cause of death: Having kids.

Up to this point, the entity in the TV station has been referred to with the term 幽霊 yuurei for ghost. However, Hiroaki calls it 化け物系 bakemono-kei or "A bakemono type of thing". We're pretty familiar with the concept of 化け物 bakemono by now; They're shapeshifting supernatural entities that impersonate a human guise in order to manipulate and deceive people. Quite literally what the Bakemon are based on.

It's not the same thing as 幽霊 yuurei. Though its shorthand お化け obake sometimes gets used to mean 幽霊 yuurei. Language drift!

His staff and Takeru sarcastically all suggest it's a ghost, but Hiroaki isn't willing to commit to anything more than "Some sort of spooky creature in the shape of a person."

As usual, the dub doesn't like the use of Buddhist sutras to ward off evil spirits.

Matt: What's up with the CD player? Hiroaki: It's a soothing recording of buffalos migrating. Boys: BUFFALO!?!? Hiroaki: Yeah, I heard these recordings help with stress. At this point, I'm willing to try anything. (chanting) I'm a happy little buffalo.... Matt: (laughing) You've flipped your lid! Hiroaki: Huh? (Matt leaves) T.K.: Don't mind him, Dad. He's just not a happy little buffalo! (T.K. leaves) Hiroaki: (sigh) Boy, am I hungry. (Hiroaki takes a bite and regrets it immediately) Hiroaki: CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT!!!

Matt and T.K. seem to be taking this in good fun in the dub, which goes in a more absurd direction with the introduction of the buffalo recording. It's a difference of "Oh my god, what the fuck" versus "LOL what the fuck", culminating in T.K. getting a pretty solid joke in at Hiroaki's expense. XD

We return to the FCG Building the next day, with text helpfully informing us that it's now August 2nd.

Chioka and the Editor are still trying to get their footage to work. They hit Play and watch the footage carefully for a couple seconds... until the shadow crosses over it.

Editor: Gragh! Chioka: Not again! Editor: if this keeps up, we'll get nothing done! This show airs the day after tomorrow! Chioka: Don't say things like that! We can't broadcast it like this! Editor: NYAAAAGH WHAT DO WE DO!?!?

Editor holds his head in his hands and freaks out while Chioka starts crying outright.

Chioka: T_T I put so much work into it....

Our only choice now is to just get used to having to edit with the Station Ghost haunting our monitors. I'm sure eventually this will just become something everyone at the office lives with.

The dub once again skips the date.

Editor: This is the moment of truth. So far so good. (Shadow jumps across the screen) Editor: Gragh! Chioka: Not again! Editor: Look, boss. We're never gonna finish at this rate. We're definitely gonna need more time. Chioka: Are you crazy!? This is supposed to go on the air tomorrow! Editor: OH THAT'S JUST GREAT!!! WHAT ARE WE GONNA DO!?!? Chioka: T_T My career is finished! I'll forever be known as the Haunted Director!

"Haunted Director" is a pretty badass title, honestly. You could probably make a killing in the horror industry with that kind of reputation.

The dub bumps up the deadline by a day, making this even more urgent.

Suddenly, Sakurada approaches carrying his stereo.

Sakurada: Should I play this? Chioka: Eh? Sakurada: The sutra. Chioka: (irritated) You bring an MD just to listen to that? Editor: At this point, we might as well try anything! Chioka: Eh?

Sakurada brings the stereo over to the Editor's desk and hits play. But nothing happens. For four seconds, the room is silent.

Editor: Eh? There's no sound. Is it broken? Sakurada: Huh? That's impossible. I just got this MD player.

Sakurada leans down and inspects the stereo. A deep, ghastly wailing slowly fills in the room. An eerie moan of the dead.

Editor: ^_^;; Uh, that's a weird sutra. Sakurada: (freaked out) N-No, that's... That voice isn't coming from this deck. Chioka: Then where would....

As the realization settles in over the three men, they all stand up at once. We leave them here, looking frantically around the editing room, as we go to commercial.

In the dub:

Jeremiah: We got the soundtrack back but... it's weird. Chioka: This is the very worst day of my entire life. Editor: What do you mean by weird? Play the darn tape! Chioka: Huh!? Jeremiah: Here goes! (Jeremiah plays the tape) Stereo: ... Editor: Hey, wait. I don't hear anything. Where's the music? Jeremiah: That's the thing! We recorded this music but it plays back this voice! Mysterious Voice: ...Ga...to... Jeremiah: Huh!? Editor: I didn't sign up for this! Mysterious Voice: G... Ga... to.... Jeremiah: It's the ghost! It doesn't sound happy and I bet it's coming for us! Editor: Yeah? Chioka: Agh! It could be anywhere! (All three stand up, panicking and wailing)

Having to remove the sutra leaves this scene stilted. In the original, Chioka shit-talks the sutra only for Editor to insist on trying it, causing Chioka to react with surprise. Here, the Editor simply says he wants to hear the weird thing Jeremiah brought, which is a natural reaction to what Jeremiah said. So it's not clear why Chioka suddenly gets shocked.

The original's more subtle and haunting in how it builds up the ghost.

The dub skips the commercial here and kicks it out to later.

When we return from commercial, a staff member enters Hiroaki's office to tell him what happened.

Hiroaki: What did you say!? There's a voice now!?

Then we immediately cut away from that because it's MIMI TIME, FUCKOS!!!

Mimi and Sora visit Tokyo Tower with their kouhai Miyako, reminiscing about that time they were in a punch-up with SkullMeramon that destroyed it.

Mimi: YEEEEEEAH IT'S TOKYO TOWER!!! Long time no see! Sora: And it's been fully repaired, too. Miyako: Part of it melted once, didn't it? Mimi: That was a pretty rough time for Tokyo. Miyako: I didn't know Digimon from the Digital World were responsible for that!

It still amazes me that the Chosen Children somehow managed to navigate the fallout of Odaiba being leveled by a kaiju monster, the sky splitting apart, and the whole world watching them fight a cross-dimensional monster through an omnipresent void without anyone ever finding out what any of that was about.

Fucking Dracula kidnapped everyone in Odaiba, then took all their children away in order to check them for something. And no one ever wondered what he was looking for?

I blame Godzilla. All the endless kaiju attacks desensitized the Japanese people into a state of "Well, that happened, but I have work tomorrow."

That's a joke, but it's also sort of true. This is what 頑張る ganbaru, what the spirit of Japanese perseverance against adversity, means. Japan is a nation beset by national disaster. Hurricanes, earthquakes, floods, nuclear disasters, these things are part of life in Japan and baked into the social fabric.

Living in Japan means understanding that sometimes the universe is just gonna kick you in the nuts for no reason, and then you gotta do what you gotta do. Stand firm, do the work, and get it done so we can move forward.

No one really understands what happened on those days three years ago. But they survived, they rebuilt what the monsters destroyed, and now life moves on.

In the dub:

Employee: Sir, we need you right away! Hiroaki: A shadow!? Oh no, not again!

Despite the voice being more legible in the dub version, they apparently didn't see fit to tell Hiroaki about it.

Here the dub takes its second commercial break. I guess they figured it made more sense that way. I can see the logic of both.

In the original, Hiroaki's line is a reminder of what just happened before the commercial. The dub instead keeps the TV station scenes over there on that side of the commercial and the Chosen Children scenes over here, making a clean break.

Mimi: Hey, it's Tokyo Tower! I did my first fashion shoot here. Sora: This place looks better than the last time I saw it. Yolei: Is it true that a Digimon leveled it? Mimi: Yep. And he almost demolished the entire city too. Yolei: Why did he have to destroy the tower? Why couldn't have have blasted my dentist's office instead!

...he did not almost demolish the entire city. The dub's thinking of something else.

I think they forgot about SkullMeramon and thought Tokyo Tower was destroyed in the VenomVamdemon attack. They also thought 08/01 was the date of that attack. The dub's kind of fixated on just that one battle.

But this tower wasn't anywhere near the carnage of that day. We're on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge from Odaiba and then a good 2-3 miles northwest.

If you recall, Vamdemon set up shop in the northwest corner of Odaiba, Daiba Park, and then immediately sent all of his forces in the wrong direction. It's hilarious. So we had this fight with SkullMeramon well outside of what would later become the barrier-enshrouded destruction zone of Odaiba.

Checking in with Jou, would it surprise you to learn he's studying in cram school right now?

Takeru and Yamato are out in Shibuya.

Yamato: Shibuya's as crowded as ever, huh? Takeru: Yeah! ...ah! Here.

Takeru stops Yamato when they find what they're looking for: A simple storefront with a glass display window. The boys remember Pumpmon and Gotsumon playing around and trying on clothes in the shop.

Yamato: (fondly) They were good guys. Takeru: (fondly) Yeah....

The way Takeru stops Yamato implies that they came out here specifically for this. As part of their anniversary, they make an annual trip to Shibuya to remember the Shibuya-type Digimon who gave their lives for them.

Decide for yourself whether Yamato and Takeru also annually rob an ice cream stand in their honor.

The dub gives Joe's teacher some dialogue.

Teacher: And that, students, is how we determine how fast the pie was moving when it hit the clown in the face. Joe: (thinking) Please let the bell ring. Please get me out of here!

Apparently this class sucks so much that even studious Joe hates it.

T.K.: Mall's crowded just like always. Matt: This anniversary is making me think about the Digimon we lost. T.K.: I know what you mean. Everywhere I look today, I'm seeing their faces. (Pumpkinmon and Gotsumon appear in the window briefly) Matt: (fondly) Sure are lots of good memories. T.K.: (fondly) Mhm....

The dub takes the opposite approach and suggests Matt and T.K. are just visiting "the mall" but are also haunted by the memory of Pumpkinmon and Gotsumon that saturates this place.

It's worth noting that Pumpkinmon and Gotsumon are alive in the dub version, so they might not feel obligated to memorialize the pair in the same way. Though Matt still explicitly refers to them as Digimon "we lost", which can really only mean one thing.

While Miyako's with her senpais and Takeru's with his brother, Daisuke and Iori have joined Koushiro at the Yagami residence. They're all in Taichi's room together, since the siblings have separate rooms now.

Koushiro: Since we're here, I'd like to run a little experiment.

Fuck off, Koushiro. It's a team holiday. T_T Workaholics....

Daisuke: Eh? Like what? Koushiro: Actually, it pertains to the Digital Gate. Hikari: Gate? The one we use to go to the Digital World? Koushiro: Yes.

Even in this casual setting, Iori is sitting in the formal 正座 seiza posture. Koushiro doesn't give a shit and is on his butt because he's learned how to be sociable. However, once he starts explaining himself, Koushiro gets up and transitions into the 正座 seiza position for respectability.

Koushiro: Up until now, we've always used the computer in the Computer Room to travel to and from the Digital World. I want to find out if it's possible to open the Gate from somewhere else. Iori: (excited) Eh!? How would we do that? Is that even possible? Koushiro: (sheepish) No, I just meant that it might be possible. I can't say for sure right now.

That's why we're experimenting. Koushiro has hypotheses that he wants to turn into facts.

As an aside, Tailmon has gotten really good at looking like a stuffed animal. The dead-eyed stare she's giving right now even though they aren't in public is haunting.

The dub continues the running joke of Yuuko's horrifying cooking.

Tai: My mom won't be home for a while. She's at a Cooking with Fungus class. Izzy: So, while she's gone, I thought we could do an experiment. Davis: Huh!? What kind of experiment!? Izzy: It's simple. It has to do with the Digi-Port. Kari: Digi-Port? But how are we supposed to do an experiment from here? Izzy: Right. We always have to use the computers in the school's computer lab to travel to and from the Digital World. But what if we could program our D-3 Digivices to be able to open the Digi-Port from our home computers too? Cody: Yeah! But that's easier said than done, Izzy. Where do we begin? Izzy: See, that's where it gets a little foggy. I have a couple of theories but I'm not real sure....

Kari's redundant "You mean THAT Digital Gate?" line is replaced with a very reasonable question that I really like.

And Izzy's tripping over his words again. I'm referring, specifically, to the part where he says "program our D-3 Digivices". In four words he manages to say the wrong thing twice.

First, Izzy suggests that the D-3s would need to be "programmed". They can't open Digi-Ports anywhere but the computer room now, but we could modify them to allow that. This is incorrect; What both Koushiro and Izzy is about to suggest is that they always could. No modification required.

Second, he refers to the D-3 as "our", indicating that he too has one. He does not. He has a standard Digivice incapable of opening the Digital Gate/Digi-Port.

Taichi: Get to the point, Koushiro. Koushiro: To put it simply, I don't think that computer we always use is what has the power to open the Digital Gate.

Koushiro turns away from Taichi and speaks to the junior members in the room.

Koushiro: What opens the Gate is the power of those D-3s that all of you have.

Hikari holds up her D-3.

Hikari: This? Koushiro: Yes. I'd considered this before, but I couldn't be sure so I didn't want to say anything. However, on a day like this when the computer room isn't available, it could be a problem if the Digimon Kaiser starts making any moves.

I mean. He lives there. He's kind of always making moves.

Taichi: I get it. But if that's right... Where else would we be able to enter the Digital World from? Koushiro: Right here. Taichi: HERE!?!?

Koushiro stands up and points at the computer behind Taichi.

Koushiro: As long as there's a computer. No, even without a computer, it may be possible to enter the Digital World with a D-3 alone. Group: (collective gasps) Iori: (gasp)

They let everyone give a communal shocked gasp and then zoom in on Iori just... watching how awesome his senpai is.

In the dub:

Tai: Come on, Izzy. Let's hear 'em. Izzy: Here's the thing. We've always just assumed the power of the computer is the key to opening the Digi-Port. My theory is that the computers are incidental and that the D-3s are the true power of the Digi-Port. (Kari holds up her D-3) Kari: These things? Izzy: Right. I've suspected it for some time now but I didn't say anything because I didn't have enough proof to be absolutely sure. Now with the school's computer lab being used for detention and our access to the Digi-Port being limited, the Digimon Emperor might do some damage while we're stuck looking for a way into the Digital World! Tai: That's a really good point, Izzy, but where exactly are we supposed to open the Digi-Port? Izzy: Right here. Group: HUH!?!? (Izzy stands and points at the computer) Izzy: We'll open it up right here. See, according to my theory, the D-3 is all we'll need to open the portal. But if I'm wrong, it could be dangerous. Group: (collective gasp) Cody: Ohhhhhh....

That last vocalization from Cody is somewhere between a sigh and a dawning realization.

This was pretty solid all up to "It could be dangerous", which Izzy pulls straight of his asshole. If he's wrong, the only thing that will happen is that the Digi-Port won't open. Why is he suddenly trying to inject tension into this?

This line replaces the important point that the D-3 might even be able to open Digital Gates away from the computer. Which makes sense. We never used a computer to go to and from the Digital World in the first series, and neither did Hikari and Takeru to reach the Dark Ocean. This will become relevant again.

Koushiro: Daisuke-kun, please give it a try. Daisuke: M-Me!? Hikari: That's right, Daisuke-kun. Go try it. Daisuke: G-Got it!

You heard izzy; It could be dangerous and you're expendable so chop chop!

I say this with love. Sorry, I couldn't help myself. ^_^;;

Daisuke approaches the computer and brings up the Digital Gate. He holds out his D-3 to the monitor.

Daisuke: DIGITAL GATE, OPEN!!!

The light turns green. The Digital Gate is open. Everyone shares a collective gasp of surprised glee.

Iori: The Digital Gate opened! Daisuke: Let's go! Iori: Eh? Daisuke: We went to all this trouble, so we might as well go!

Nobody answers him, but the determined smiles they shoot to the computer is answer enough.

In the dub:

Izzy: Well, who's the first guinea pig? Come on, Davis, give it a try! Davis: What!? Who, me!? Kari: (aggressively sarcastic) No, silly. He means the other boy with goggles. Davis: Oh! Where is he? (Davis brings up the Digital Gate) Davis: Here goes. DIGI-PORT OPEN!!! (The light turns green) Cody: I can't believe it! Nice work, Izzy! Davis: Let's go through! Group: Huh!? Davis: We need to test the Digi-Port!

The tonal whiplash between Hikari/Kari's two lines is a reminder of how aggressively different the vibes between her and Daisuke/Davis is in the two versions. As Taichi's kouhai, Daisuke's basically an honorary part of the Yagami family who Hikari occasionally flexes her influence over to move the plot along. While Kari just has reasonably well-justified contempt for this possessive dipshit.

Kari's line read for that sarcastic quip is scathing. This is not poking fun; This is "Oh my god, he can't actually be that stupid" tone which sets up Davis's punchline of actually being that stupid.

Davis's motive for going through the Digi-Port has also changed. In the original, he's just gung-ho about any chance he gets to get in there. Daisuke loves being a Chosen Child. He really is having a blast with all this. There is no other reason. Davis just wants to finish testing it to make sure it worked.

Once the rest of the team's onboard, Daisuke turns back around to the computer. It's time to--

Yuuko: (from the entrance hall) I'm home!!!

ABORT. It's time to ABORT.

Fun linguistic fact, the phrase for returning home is ただいま帰りました Tadaima kaerimashita. There's no funny meaning to it like the "I am here to bother you" thing you say when visiting someone. It's literally just "I have now returned home".

However, it's also a mouthful after a long trip so people have gotten into the habit of just saying ただいま Tadaima. Which is not the "returned home" part but the "I have now" part.

So basically, in Japan, it is customary to yell out "Right now!" as you burst through the front door.

Out front, Yuuko notices five pairs of shoes by the door.

Yuuko: Huh? We have a lot of guests....

Back in Taichi's room, he stops Daisuke.

Taichi: Daisuke, wait! The bag is home.

Okay that's gonna need some explaining. That sounds bad in English but in Japan, お袋 Ofukuro is actually a term of endearment. A bag is what holds valuables and important treasures. It's a phrase typically used by men or boys to indicate a particularly close and emotionally dependent relationship with their mothers.

In essence, a "bag" mother is a bottomless container from which love and support pours out. Taichi basically just called her "Mommy" right in front of everyone.

Taichi: Daisuke, wait! Mommy's home. Daisuke: B-But.... Taichi: All of our shoes are out front! It will be weird if no one's here. Iori: He's right.

Daisuke reluctantly relents and closes the Gate.

Daisuke: It's closed. Koushiro: Like I thought, it can open from here too. Taichi: If only we knew that sooner, we could all have gone to the Digital World yesterday right on August 1st. Koushiro: You're right. I'm sorry I didn't think of that. Taichi: Ahaha, that's fine! It's not your fault, Koushiro. There's always next year. Hikari: Mhm! Iori: That said, while being able to reach the Digital World from home may seem convenient, it may also be troublesome. Hikari: Why is that?

As if on cue, Yuuko knocks twice and then opens the door uninvited.

Yuuko: You have friends over? Iori, Daisuke, & Koushiro: Ojamashitemasu! Taichi: H-Hi!

There's "I'm here to bother you", the customary phrase for entering into another person's hospitality. Even though the Gate is closed, everybody lines up in front of the computer, guiltily using their bodies to shield Tailmon, Chibimon, and Upamon from view.

Yuuko: Hello. Make yourselves at home.

Yuuko shuts the door and leaves the kids to their business.

Koushiro: Iori-kun is right. If we start going in and out from our home computers, we have to be more careful than ever to avoid being caught by our families. Hikari: Yeah, if we suddenly vanished from our rooms, Mom would be so shocked that she might call the police. Taichi: Yeah. Koushiro: We'll have to devise some sort of countermeasure....

One step forward and one step back. We can go to the Digital World from any computer but without a solid plan in place, we shouldn't. No one here wants to be the next missing child.

In the dub:

Yuuko: I'm home! Group: (collective gasp) (Cut to Yuuko out front) Yuuko: Visitors? I'd better make fungus cookies.

I'm sure Izzy and nobody else will be thrilled about that.

Tai: Wait! We can't go! My mom's home early! Davis: But-but-- Tai: She saw our shoes by the door. If she comes up here and we're gone, we're toast! Cody: Tai is right.

He is not. "Up" here, Tai? You're in an apartment. There is only one floor.

(Digi-Port closes) Davis: Aww, man.... Izzy: Bummer. I wanted to see my theory through. Tai: Don't worry, Izzy. You'll get your chance soon enough. I just wish we would have known about this earlier; It might have saved us some close calls with our parents. Izzy: Yeah, I know. I should have said something sooner. Tai: Haha, no need to sweat it! It's not your fault! Nice work, Izzy! Kari: Mhm! Cody: Now that we know that the D-3 can open the portal from any one of our homes, we're going to have to be extra especially careful. Kari: But why? (Yuuko knocks six times and then enters) Yuuko: Hey kids! Group: Hi! Kari: (guiltily) Hi, Mom! Tai: (panicked) Hi, Mom! Yuuko: I hope everyone's hungyyyyyy! (Yuuko closes the door) Izzy: Because of just that, Kari. Keeping this secret from our families becomes a lot more difficult when they can barge in on us at any second. Kari: I can't imagine if our mother came into our rooms in the night and we weren't there. She'd probably call the National Guard and the Army! Tai: Mhm.... Izzy: We're just gonna have to work out some sort of a plan....

The correct term for Japan's military is the Japan Self-Defense Force or JSDF, but localization strikes again. Per the Constitution of Japan which the U.S. forced on them after WWII, Japan legally cannot have a standing army. The JSDF is their "Technically not an army so it's not breaking the rules" army.

In any case, the dub changes the context for the "If only we knew about this sooner" bit. Taichi laments that visiting the Digital World on the anniversary of the day they were all pulled int would be great. But the only part of the anniversary that the dub cares about is the final battle with VenomMyotismon. so they change that to Tai regretting how much easier this would make their recent adventures.

The next day. August 3rd. Today is the day that they defeated Vamdemon.

The Chosen Children gather outside the FCG Building. Hikari's brought a bouquet of flowers. The show never explicitly says what those flowers are for but, from context, she probably intends to leave them at Wizarmon's "grave", so to speak.

Coming to the FCG Building to memorialize Wizarmon on the day of their death is implicitly the last leg of the annual anniversary event. Just like how Yamato and Takeru visit Shibuya to memorialize Pumpmon and Gotsumon on 08/02, the day of their death.

Suddenly, dark storm clouds roll in over the building.

Hikari: The weather changed so suddenly.... Tailmon: Yeah....

Uh, the last time this happened (on this exact date, even) Odaiba was turned into a rubble field. So. We should. Probably be ready for that.

With the stormclouds comes lightning. A few stay bolts strike in the general area. But then one hits the FCG Building itself,

Group: HUH!?!? Daisuke: It was struck by lightning!

Thanks, Daisuke.

In the dub, the timestamp's gone again.

Kari: Look at that huge cloud! Did you see how it just came out of nowhere? Gatomon: Uh-huh. T.K.: Those weathermen are always wrong! (Lightning strike) Group: HUH!?!? Davis: Aggggh Something here's not right!

It's a little dry in both versions but T.K. tries to punch it up with a quip.

Inside the building, it's a total blackout. The terrorized staff run screaming from the building.

Hiroaki follows his staff out into a hallway. Suddenly, a shadow passes beneath his foot. It's the shadow from the monitors. In the darkened hallway, Hiroaki watches the shadow move across the walls, then double back and head the other way.

Outside, the Chosen Children watch people evacuate the building, unsure of what's happening.

Hikari: What's going on? Tailmon: (gasp)

Tailmon suddenly realizes something. Dropping to all fours, she bounds into the FCG Building.

Hikari: Tailmon!

The other children give chase, pursuing Tailmon inside.

The dub gives Hiroaki a line upon seeing the shadow on the wall.

Hiroaki: Not again! (Everyone flees the building) Woman: IT'S THE GHOST!!! Man: IT'S AFTER US!!! Group: Huh!? Gatomon: (gasp) (Gatomon bounds inside) Kari: Gatomon!

The children enter the station, following Tailmon up to the spherical observation deck. The room where they confronted Vamdemon and Phantomon three years ago to try and save Hikari. A lone computer quietly turns itself on.

Up on the ceiling, the shadow rapidly circles the light fixture.

Hikari: What the hell is that!?

The desk shakes, blowing a stack of fliers at the children. The computer monitor fills in with random letters in eerie red font. Tailmon tries to call out to the entity.

Tailmon: I'm... I'm here! That's enough! I'm here!

The only reply she gets is that low, deep-throated groaning from before.

In the dub, once again, there's much less mystery surrounding what this haunting is because it uses its words.

Ghost: Ga... Ga... Ga... To... To... To... GATOMON!!! (Gatomon enters followed by the kids) Kari: Gatomon! (Ghost whirls on the ceiling) T.K.: It's the ghost! Kari: Who ya gonna call? (Desk shakes) T.K.: Hey, what's going on!? (Fliers are blown at the children and the monitor fills in with random letters in red text) Ghost: Gatomon! Davis: WHAT DOES IT WANT!?!? Tai: You're asking me!? Gatomon: It wants me. I'm here! I'm right here! What do you want!?

Tai and Kari make quips to try and ease the tension.

Following Tailmon's cue, Chibimon has a realization of his own.

Chibimon: It's a Digimon that's doing this! Daisuke: Wait, what!?

Chibimon leaps out of Daisuke's arms. Poromon and Upamon join him.

Upamon: Yeah, no question about it! Miyako: How can you be so sure? Poromon: We're Digimon too! We just know!

Chibimon, Poromon, and Upamon evolve into their Child forms, ready to fight.

Miyako: They evolved! Hawkmon: If a Digimon is present in the real world, that can only mean they're our enemy! Daisuke: Then it really is a Digimon!? Hikari: (contemplative) A Digimon....

Hikari's starting to put the pieces together. But the new recruits lack the context to see this as anything other than Bad Digimon Causing Trouble.

In the dub, DemiVeemon shit-talks Gatomon for trying to answer the ghost's call.

DemiVeemon: Davis, I think she flipped her lid. Davis: What's that!? (The Baby Digimon line up in front of the children) Upamon: Oh no! Let's do something! Yolei: Are you guys sure this is a good idea? Poromon: We've gotta save Gatomon! (Veemon, Hawkmon, and Armadillomon evolve) Yolei: Go get 'em! Hawkmon: I assume that's a servant of the Digimon Emperor sent here to frighten us! Davis: He doesn't stand a ghost of a chance! Kari: (half-hearted) Good one.

Oh, like your Ghostbusters quip was any better.

They cut out all of the Digimon IDing the ghost as a fellow Digimon but Hawkmon nonetheless confidently asserts that the ghost works for Ken.

In the original, the Digimon pre-judge this ghost based on the logic that there's not really any reason a Digimon would be here other than to cause trouble.

They aren't necessarily wrong in that; Entering the human world without the assistance of a human Partner isn't exactly an easy thing to do. Korra has not opened Spirit Portals to the Digital World; Crossing the boundary is very hard. Historically, non-Partner Digimon appearing in the human world has only ever happened for destructive purposes.

But they are wrong nonetheless. They're making a bad assumption and escalating the situation.

In the dub, they're just jumping in to protect Gatomon from a perceived threat. There is no bad assumption; This thing is after Gatomon and they intend to get in between them.

There's also a difference in the reactions of their human Partners. Miyako and Daisuke are struggling to keep up with what the Digimon are doing. They're confused, and this is escalating too fast for them to follow. Yolei and Davis are completely on the same page as their Digimon and want to fuck up this ghost.

Alright, it's Fight Time!

V-mon: Alright, let's go! Hawkmon: HO-- Tailmon: STOP!!!

Due to an animation error, Hawkmon accidentally leaves his beak behind when he charges.

The trio gets all of two steps forward before Tailmon jumps in front of them. Fight Time is cancelled. There will be no Fight Time.

She does not say anything further to them. Just tells them to buzz off and resumes addressing the ghost.

Tailmon: I'm here.

This time, her words get through. The random text on the screen suddenly vanishes, replaced by the word テイルモン Tailmon. The groaning voice finally speaks a legible word.

Ghost: Taaaaaailmoooooon....

The screen scrolls, revealing the word テイルモン Tailmon written over and over and over again.

Tailmon: Yes, I'm here. Ghost: Taaaaaailmoooooon.... Iori: It's calling for Tailmon!

Thanks, Iori.

In the dub:

Veemon: Ready!? Huh? (The Digimon charge but Gatomon cuts them off) Gatomon: Wait! Digimon: Huh!? Gatomon: I'm here! Ghost: Gatomon!

They rewrite Gatomon's name in English on the computer, both the big lettering and the repeated scrawling.

Gatomon: Don't move, guys! Ghost: Ooooogh.... Cody: GATOMON, RUN FOR IT!!!

At the part where the ghost starts speaking Tailmon's name in the original, it stops speaking Gatomon's name and everyone acts like it's attacking. Even Gatomon seems to think the ghost's about to start shooting at them.

Finally, the shadow drifts to the floor and crosses over to Tailmon, stopping just in front of her.

Tailmon: Wizarmon!

All eight veterans let out shocked gasps. Sure enough, a transparent Wizarmon rises out of the floor.

Wizarmon: Tailmon.... Hikari: WIZARMON!!! Daisuke: Th-That's.... Iori: It's.... Miyako: Wizarmon? Tailmon: Wizarmon, you were calling out for me, weren't you? Wizarmon: There's something I had to tell you. Tailmon: Something you had to tell me? What is it? Wizarmon: You cannot win against this enemy with only the power you currently possess. Daisuke: Enemy? You mean the Digimon Kaiser? Wizarmon: The enemy is not merely what you see standing against you now. A far greater darkness is gathering. This darkness cannot be dispelled by your power alone. To restore what has been swallowed by darkness to its original state-- Tailmon: Restore!? Wizarmon: --kindness will release a golden radiance. Miyako: Kindness will release a golden radiance? Wizarmon: Kindness alone will not be enough. You'll need the golden radiance. Tailmon: I understand. Wizarmon: Time is running out. All of you must hurry. V-mon: Us? Wizarmon: I'm counting on you, Tailmon.

Wizarmon returned from the grave to be a cryptic fuck. Where did he even get this intel?

I love how Tailmon interrupts him like, "Hold up, as far as I knew, the only mission statement we have involves consecutive punches to a child's most vital organs."

In the dub:

Gatomon: Wizardmon! (Veterans all gasp in shock; Wizardmon rises from the floor) Wizardmon: ...Gatomon....

The dub takes its third commercial break here. Then, on return, we watch the tail end of Wizardmon emerging again.

Wizardmon: Gatomon, I'm glad you've come. Kari: WIZARDMON!!! Cody: ...a friend!? Yolei: I SURE HOPE SO!!! Gatomon: Wizardmon... It's good to see you again. Wizardmon: I need to tell you something, Gatomon. Gatomon: What is it, old friend? Wizardmon: Your great enemy... You cannot beat him as you are now. Davis: Does he... Does he mean the Digimon Emperor? Wizardmon: Your enemy is not only the Digimon Emperor but a much greater darkness. The darkness... It cannot be defeated with strength alone. You must return the one wrapped in darkness to his true self. Gatomon: What? True self? Wizardmon: Kindness will release the golden radiance. Yolei: Kindness!? I hope he doesn't mean we have to be nice to Ken! Wizardmon: Kindness alone will not prevail, Gatomon. The golden radiance is also necessary. Gatomon: I see, but-- Wizardmon: You don't have much time. You must hurry. Goodbye, my friend. Veemon: But wait! Wizardmon: I can't. Gatomon, be careful.

Pretty solid.

It's time for Wizarmon to go but Tailmon isn't ready to say goodbye.

Tailmon: WIZARMON!!!

She holds her paw up for them. Wizarmon reaches out, but their hand passes straight through Tailmon's paw. Tailmon lets out a distraught gasp. Wizarmon looks at their hands and then, with resignation, floats backwards away from Tailmon.

In the dub:

Gatomon: WIZARDMON!!! (They try to touch hands, but pass through each other) Wizardmon: (looks at his hands) ...I'm sorry. (Wizardmon floats away)

One extra line of pure heartbreak.

As Wizardmon floats backwards towards the window to the exterior walkway, Tailmon gives chase.

Tailmon: WIZARMON!!! WIZARMON!!!

Wizarmon floats through the glass, while Tailmon runs face-first into it. Pressed against the glass, she screams for them.

Tailmon: WIZARMON!!! Wizarmon: Hurry!

That's the last word they speak. Wizarmon drifts out onto the walkway where they died and fades away into nothing.

As Tailmon starts crying, Hikari slowly approaches her from behind.

Hikari: ...Tailmon....

Hikari kneels down and hugs Tailmon. They grieve together.

In the dub, Gatomon doesn't say anything until she smacks into the window glass.

Gatomon: WIZARDMON!!! Wizardmon: Hurry! (Wizardmon fades away) Kari: ...Gatomon....

While Hikari tends to Tailmon's feelings, the other children unpack.

Sora: They came to warn us. Takeru: On this day, in this place, Wizarmon....

Flashback to the moment they died. Leaping in front of Vamdemon's Night Raid, Wizarmon gave their life to protect Hikari and Tailmon.

As Wizarmon dies, Tailmon and Hikari cry for them all over again. Then we return to the present.

Hikari: Will we ever see them again? Taichi: I'm sure we will. Yamato: That's right.

Hikari holds Tailmon who, in turn, holds the bouquet. With tears in her eyes, Tailmon says her farewell.

Tailmon: Thank you, Wizarmon. I will not waste the life you gave me that day. Narrator: The message that Wizarmon left with them during that brief reunion, "Kindness will release the golden radiance", remains shrouded in mystery.

Oh, I thought they solved it. My bad. Thanks, Narrator-sama.

We end here, leaving the children to finish saying goodbye to their departed friend.

In the dub, like usual, they talk over the flashback.

Sora: He came back to tell us.... Davis: Who was Wizardmon, anyway? (Flashback) Sora (V.O.): We were battling a very evil dark Digimon named Myotismon. He was about to destroy Kari and Gatomon. Wizardmon stepped in the way of Myotismon's attack. And he paid the ultimate price. Wizardmon sacrificed himself in order to save Kari and Gatomon, and they'll never forget him for it. Kari: Will we ever see him again? Tai: I'm sure we will, Kari. Gatomon: That Wizardmon... What a friend. Even from beyond, he still continues to watch over me. Narrator: What is the significance of the golden radiance? Find out on the next Digimon: Digital Monsters!

We will not. That's a few episodes off. Nice try.

It's a little awkward that the episode where Wizardmon died went to a lot of trouble, even slicing and rearranging the footage to make it seem like he'd be okay. But now his ghost is here and they just have to fess up and go, "Yeah, he died. He's dead. Sorry." But at least they own up to it.

Assessment: You know, as hauntings go, there are worse places to be anchored than a TV station. It's like haunting Disney Plus or HBO Max. Wizarmon will never run out of entertainment options.

I love that the kids take a three-day holiday every year to stroll down memory lane and remember what happened to them back then. It's a good thing Yamato's dad is an important guy at Fuji or it'd be pretty awkward explaining why they need to bring flowers to the observation deck every year. I can't imagine them getting past security under normal circumstances.

Do you think the janitor throws away the bouquet in the trash after they leave? Or do they leave it on the walkway itself, and then the wind whips it into some passerby's face? This really is an awkward place for a gravesite.

In any case, this episode not only foreshadows things to come but also serves as a beautiful added epilogue on the original series.

I don't know why the dub removed all the timestamps but based on that "08/01 is the day we defeated Myotismon" bit, I think they're trying to suggest that the entire episode happened in one day. For some reason. IDK.

Dub's full of dub-isms but they do not fuck up the Wizardmon reunion scene and that's the most important part of the episode.

[dearclickclack]

Dear Click Clack

Earlier this morning I was peacefully writing a manuscript for a personal passion project as one typically does at the healthy hour of 6am but I forgot to turn my oven off and my house burned down, Manuscript included! Whatever shall I do?? I don’t remember what I was writing I was in a trance state. I could never recreate it now!

Sincerely, Ivana New-Holme

p.s this is a time sensitive manner my editor is practically breathing down my neck and my career is on the line please click clack help me

Dear Ivana New-Holme,

[Despite the urgency, Click Clack finds himself hesitating. He knows that New-Holme may not like what he has to say next... but it must be done.]

"Unfortunately, your editor may very well be the first person you should contact." He raises an inky black finger, a silent request to the frazzled writer to let him explain. "Think of it this way - if you were in their shoes, how would you prefer to learn that a client of yours is out of commission due to a life-threatening situation? Would you rather have them call you and tell you directly? Or would you rather learn days, perhaps even weeks later, after your patience been worn much thinner than it already was and they've worried themselves even sicker trying to keep you from finding out? And if your editor fails to understand that..."

The god leans in with a conspiratorial whisper. "Take it from a professional - you may be better off writing for someone more appreciative of your work. Maybe you'll even find yourself writing at more reasonable hours, like 3 AM. Imagine...."

[super-hero-confessions]

This is more of an observation than anything else, I’m not saying this to be mean to anyone or having a haha moment but more people need to speak up about how fandom spaces are being treated.

Fandom is supposed to be fun, a safe space for people to have discussions and share art or thoughts with people who share their passion yet now more than ever it has become deathly toxic to the point people are having to make private discord spaces because of it or are leaving something they love entirely. This is not okay. It’s not okay to spew hate at people over ships or anything else, it’s not okay to call writers and artists despicable names to the point they are deactivating their socials and ending their comic runs because of fan behavior. It’s deeply disturbing to see the way some of you, not even some as it’s a growing problem within certain fandoms, are treating other people. I’m not saying this sarcastically, I’m being serious when I say if a fictional character being shipped with someone other than their canon s/o is making you so irrationally angry that you feel the need to make disgusting comments under posts that aren’t harming anyone, you should take a step back or seek therapy. There are clear attachment issues going on here if you feel such despair over made up people.

Also for the newer comic fans popping up I want to emphasise that what happens in one run doesn’t mean it will be consistent in another. Your ships will be torn apart, put somewhere else and maybe come back together at another point, this is the way it’s always been. It’s not serious enough to be crying over or hating on other fans or writers, editors etc. Marvel, DC and such do not care about the characters, the era of that is long gone, it’s all about money now, being critical is always encouraged but come at people correctly. You are speaking to real life humans, agree or disagree all you like but you have no right in calling people terrible names or bullying anyone ever. The second you need to spew things like predator or groomer or that someone is misogynistic because the ship you like isn’t front and centre is the second your opinion is no longer valid. That’s not okay, you should be called out for that particularly by the others in the fandom you are in and when that part of the fandom doesn’t speak up and instead encourages you, others in the community will ostracise you. It’s all well and good saying you don’t claim them or you aren’t like them but how are others supposed to know that when the majority of that side of the fandom is behaving this way? Call people out for being shitty, you don’t have to be mean, a simple “hey, that’s not okay and we don’t accept that in this fandom space.” would do. More and more creators are moving on because of the treatment they are getting, soon enough the fandom will be dead and the same people who caused it will be whinging about not having any art or fics to read and that’s not including the professional creators who are being abused. Fandom space is about supporting one another, you don’t have to like everything and that’s okay but to actively go out of your way to be hateful to another person who is sharing something they love and doing no harm to anyone is not normal, you are the issue here. Do better.

It’s nice to have this confession space to air thoughts and grievances as it keeps people from harassing content creators because of your personal dislikes so also be mindful in how you treat the blog owners too. This is also a fandom space, these people are kind enough to have this space open for us so please keep it respectful for them too. Real life people should be more important than fiction characters or celebrities that we don’t personally know playing a brief role that will change when they retire etc. As I previously stated, if you feel such anger over other peoples opinions and ships you need to step back and get in touch with reality or talk to someone who can help you will whatever is triggering this response in you.

[ernmark]

I just stumbled across somebody saying how editing their own novel was too exhausting, and next time they'll run it through Grammerly instead.

For the love of writing, please do not trust AI to edit your work.

Listen. I get it. I am a writer, and I have worked as a professional editor. Writing is hard and editing is harder. There's a reason I did it for pay. Consequently, I also get that professional editors can be dearly expensive, and things like dyslexia can make it difficult to edit your own stuff.

Algorithms are not the solution to that.

Pay a newbie human editor. Trade favors with a friend. Beg an early birthday present from a sibling. I cannot stress enough how important it is that one of the editors be yourself, and at least one be somebody else.

Yourself, because you know what you intended to put on the page, and what is obviously counter to your intention.

The other person, because they're going to see the things that you can't notice. When you're reading your own writing, it's colored by what you expect to be on the page, and so your brain will frequently fill in missing words or make sense of things that don't actually parse well. They're also more likely to point out things that are outside your scope of knowledge.

Trust me, human editors are absolutely necessary for publishing.

If you convince yourself that you positively must run your work through an algorithm before submitting to an agent/publisher/self-pub site, do yourself and your readers a massive favor: get at least two sets of human eyeballs on your writing after the algorithm has done its work.

Because here's the thing:

AI draws from whatever data sets it's trained on, and those data sets famously aren't curated.

You cannot trust it to know whether that's an actual word or just a really common misspelling.

People break conventions of grammar to create a certain effect in the reader all the time. AI cannot be relied upon to know the difference between James Joyce and a bredlik and an actual coherent sentence, or which one is appropriate at any given part of the book.

AI picks up on patterns in its training data sets and imitates and magnifies those patterns-- especially bigotry, and particularly racism.

AI has also been known to lift entire passages wholesale. Listen to me: Plagiarism will end your career. And here's the awful thing-- if it's plagiarizing a source you aren't familiar with, there's a very good chance you wouldn't even know it's been done. This is another reason for other humans than yourself-- more people means a broader pool of knowledge and experience to draw from.

I know a writer who used this kind of software to help them find spelling mistakes, didn't realize that a setting had been turned on during an update, and had their entire work be turned into word salad-- and only found out when the editor at their publishing house called them on the phone and asked what the hell had happened to their latest book. And when I say 'their entire work', I'm not talking about their novel-- I'm talking about every single draft and document that the software had access to.

[aunt-pol]

Hello! This post will probably seem out of place on my blog but I am offering free proofreading and copy editing services in order to build a portfolio! Freelancing is a hard thing to get started in, especially when most of one's recent job experience has been in the service industry, but I love editing for folks and I'm really trying to make this the year I get it up and running, even if only as a side hustle. If you have any projects you'd like to have copy edited or proofread, please keep reading to see if we can help each other!

My qualifications:

Studied English at the University of Dallas

Worked as a copy editor at the student newspaper

Did a summer internship in the corporate communications dept for a global company which involved, among other things, independently editing the daily company newsblast

Am a hobbyist writer on my own time - I relate from both sides of the red pen!

Simply editing things for family, friends, and online mutuals! Which has gotten me testimonials such as these:

"Katie provided an attentive and thorough reading of my resume, and suggested several minute but important corrections which helped to clarify my writing! She responded quickly to my request, edited the document and returned it to me within a short timeline, and was clear and direct in her feedback."

-Marie Trotter, writer and critic

"Katie Kuplack is the editor you need! Her perceptive notes and sharp eye for grammar, such as verb tense and sentence structure, will make your writing more professional and publishable. Katie will take your writing seriously, offering honest feedback and encouraging you to exceed your expectations. I recommend Katie’s editing services for any writing project that you value and hope to share with the world."

-Sarah O'Brien, EIC of Boston Accent Lit and author of Shapeshifter

How It Would Work:

You can message me here or email me at katiek.edits@gmail.com about the project you'd like me to work on and we'll talk about what service you're wanting, turnaround time, etc. I'm open to bouncing it back and forth as much as you need to get the final product you want. In the end, you get a more polished whatever-it-is, and I have your permission to keep before-and-after samples of your project for my portfolio, to be used on freelancing platforms like Upwork or eventually shown on my own website.

Types of Docs/Projects I am particularly interested in working on:

Short fiction and poetry.

Captions and subtitles*

Website copy and blog posts

Resumes, cover letters, other business writing

*I realize these typically don't get edited by a third party, but I am also interested in getting experience creating them if that's something you need!

Other stuff you should know:

I'm already familiar with AP Style, planning to learn Chicago, and can of course work with whatever company- or project-specific style guide you might have.

My topical specialties include English lit, pop culture, fandom, business communications, martial arts, beauty and skincare, and the coffee industry.

I have experience editing for ESL writers and translated work.

I can work with you through both Google and Microsoft applications.

What I will NOT work on:

Any AI-generated content

Marketing/sales copy

Full-length books/novels (not for free)

Amazon/Kindle e-books

Academic papers, dissertations, etc.

Please reblog to help me get this around and thank you if you read this whole thing! I know this is a long shot but I hope to hear from some of y'all soon. :)

[tussive]

Motherfucker I just typed this whole thing out and was adding tags and then I deleted them because I didn't think it was important to add that part and then the text editor crashed and I lost it all.

So, at work in the morning Bill, the opener, is the first person who comes in. Most days then Deb is the next person to come in, this is a different Deb from the district manager, if anybody actually follows the stuff I talk about lol. But most mornings from 7-8 it will just be me, Bill and Deb. This morning Deb was complaining about the previous day, which is usually what she does, but she had to work with Carter yesterday, who is trans. Deb was complaining that Carter wasn't really doing much or helping, which sounds correct he never really does, so I was adding my experiences with working with him and they both kept getting upset that I was using he/him pronouns for him.

And it's like...can we just not? I mean, I kind of assumed for their general vibe already that we weren't going to agree on this issue, which I mean, whatever. But like, this is a job, can we just try to be professional please? Carter is a bad worker, let's focus on that.

[fourraccoonsinacoat]

20 Questions: Writing Edition

Thanks for the tag @cawyden-gaming

How many works do you have on ao3?

I have 5. I am newer to fanfic writing, though I've been reading it forever.

What’s your total ao3 word count?

73,396

What are your top five fics by kudos?

I only have 5, so it's the four BG3 fics and then my Rogue Trader fic.

What fandoms do you write for?

BG3 and Warhammer 40k: Rogue Trader. I've started a few other fics here and there over the years, but never got to the point of posting them.

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to respond to every one, because I want people to know their feedback/comments/love/whatever is appreciated. Any time anyone reads anything of mine, I'm grateful.

What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

None of my fics have angsty endings, though I am not opposed to writing one.

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

It will be Mongrel Hearts, whenever it's done. Happy in a Warhammer 40k sense, at least.

Do you get hate on fics?

Nah, ain't nobody got time for that.

Do you write smut?

Sure do! I love writing emotion, and sex is a highly emotional act.

Do you write crossovers?

I have not.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of, though I have had my writing stolen in other venues. Not a good feeling.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Don't think so.

Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Nope.

What’s your all time favourite ship?

Right now it's Heinrix x Visenya, from my RT fic. Also a big fan of Henry x Hans from KCD2.

What’s the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

We talking fic or other...? For fics, it's probably a canon Durge x Gortash fic that will never see the light of day.

What are your writing strengths?

Probably dialogue and character voice. I really love exploring characters through their dialogue and using dialogue to define certain characteristics. I also like weaving bits of character voice into prose so you get a feel for the character as you're looking at the world through their lens.

What are your writing weaknesses?

I am not a brief person when I write. It's criticism I receive on my professional writing, so I know my hobby writing has got to be bloated with prose and character exposition. I do feel like I am slowly becoming a better self-editor, though.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in a fic?

I have to get writing translated all the time for work, so I'd probably do okay with it as long as I had someone who is a native speaker to help with translations.

First fandom you wrote for?

And published a fic for: BG3

Favourite fic you’ve ever written?

Definitely Mongrel Hearts. BG3 got me into writing fanfic, but Rogue Trader made me fall in love with it.

Gently tagging some people I don't think I've seen tagged yet. @icasticonoclast @vspin @plethomacademia @amasec @andrigyn @swordbisexual @eregar @lilac-lich

[neartheeasternfence]

Four Years Ago, Yashiro “Got Away”

Impressions; Chapter 56

Yashiro on the title page seems exposed and vulnerable. The appended phrase is an eye-catcher or advertising slogan, not a part of the work. It must be the editor in charge who is the first, professional reader and companion of the serialization that devises them each time. It is a little regretful that they are eliminated from volumes. 56’s eye-catcher can be interpreted as “[A] want any excuse to stay close [to B],” I wonder. If A is Doumeki, B is Yashiro, and vice versa. Doumeki is the one staring at Yashiro, and at the same time, Yashiro holds feelings for Doumeki.

Doumeki did not confirmed the contents of the video. To Doumeki, whatever the situation, it was Yashiro’s privacy. Asked why he has gotten so much pleasure with Doumeki, Yashiro’s face turns straight one moment, and he replies that only their bodies have good compatibility. While he must have had the same question too, has he adjusted it that way for the time being? Doumeki seems delighted to learn that Yashiro is interested in Doumeki’s personal life. However, Yashiro almost runs away from the scene. He fears getting attached to anyone or anything as ever -- “I am afraid of losing you (I will not lose you if I do not get you) (ch.23, vol.5).”

Something is horrifying about the interaction over “You prefer cruel treatment, don't you?” It is the same as “You go in for pain, right?”, “Yes,” and “Without pain, I cannot arouse…” (ch.24, vol.5). It clearly shows that Yashiro’s trauma has not changed in any way and remains there. Even though Doumeki comprehended something at the end of volume 6 (Tobu tori ha kotoba wo motanai, the translated title: Flying birds never speak), he was not privy to everything... In chapter 25 (vol.5), he minded Yashiro giving tears, but little did he know that Yashiro was having such flashbacks. Since Yashiro is positive to Doumeki’s questioning, the context goes to ‘I prefer cruelty.’ Still, Doumeki cannot help settling Yashiro’s words, plus his enraptured tone, on ‘I prefer you’ or ‘I prefer doing it with you,’ I think.

Doumeki longs to touch Yashiro skin to skin, not to bite or restrain him. His pleasure lies in bringing Yashiro pleasure. For Doumeki, rimming is a symbolic act, an attempt to reach back to Yashiro’s past he cannot fully know, to reclaim the entirety of Yashiro. In chapter 52, I realized that he must have lived a life in the Sakura Family ruminating over the whole memory from the three months with Yashiro. In chapter 56, I recognized that it was Yashiro’s ‘taste,’ his figure and essential parts, and every ‘texture’ of him that occupied Doumeki’s private fantasies. His side face expression is the same when he looks up from Yashiro’s lower stomach, takes a small breath over Yashiro’s heart, shifts from fingering to rimming, or lightly stirs Yashiro’s emissions with his fingertips. Doumeki must be profoundly impressed by experiencing in reality what he has only imagined for the past four years.

When Yashiro first used the word “rape” (in katakana), I was surprised (ch.47, vol.8). Words are labels and categorize things. All the sex Yashiro had experienced, even as he had grown up and regained a certain degree of sexual agency, had been substantially so. He found Doumeki was the sole exception. At that time, it was sorted into the category of “something different from what I know” (ch.25). Although it may not derive a name even now, the rest was categorized eventually as rape. One night with Doumeki drastically altered Yashiro’s perception of sex.

So, what is this? Despite its not being rape, yet not the equivalent as four years ago either… (I suppose that means). Doumeki seems to have developed an understanding that four years ago, Yashiro “got away” because he imposed his emotions on Yashiro. Doumeki takes a breath at the top of the vertical panel, while the bottom two-thirds of it is blank (filled with screen tones). It suggests the passing of time and indicates that he has chosen his words prudentially.

[aevallare]

How does one acquire a beta? Actually— what is a beta? And do you need one? I’m new to the fanfic writing club but have been reading it forever… help?

A beta is a different thing for different people, but its traditional definition is simple - it's a reader who looks through your work before it goes live and gives their opinion from the perspective of a reader. That's the difference between a beta reader and an editor. Editors - developmental editors especially - look at a work from a more professional standpoint.

In practice, beta readers in fandom serve a lot of the same functions as editors because you aren't hiring anyone to look over your work. A lot of beta readers don't touch developmental editing because it involves working on changes that are sometimes sweeping, and most beta editors stick to copy and line editing where fanfic is concerned. This means they're working with stuff like sentence structure, grammar, spelling, etc. and also just... whatever the author asks. "Hey, does X work?" is a question you can ask and have answered without someone fully digging into your guts (unless you want them to).

A beta reader is there to help you. It's that simple. You don't need one, though; I found mine incidentally, but I do almost all my own copy editing. How you find one - I'm afraid I'm not a great person to ask because mine fell in my lap, but I know there are many discord servers for this purpose.

Best of luck. Kick your fic's ass.

[flightyalrighty]

What have been some of your big inspirations/points of education* with your comic work?

*could mean learning resources but also just, good advice you got once or improvements to your workflow you figured out

Thanks for this ask!! :]

I went to the School of Visual Arts, where I majored in Cartooning! A lot of what I learned, I learned from Indie Cartoonist Jason Little and DC/Marvel Editor Joey Cavalieri, both of whom taught multiple classes I've taken (mainly fundamental stuff but there were also some extra classes with them like Jason taught my Digital Comics course and Joey taught my History of Cartooning class). I learned how to draw trees from Jason. And from reading Pogo.

I've drawn a lot of inspiration in my storytelling from both Bone and Hellboy, mostly! Both Jeff Smith and Mike Mignola are masters of pacing in comics, and if you happen to be unfamiliar with their works, I can't recommend them enough. Besides those two, the rich, moody internal monologues of Spider-Man: Blue and Spider-Man: Evolve or Die are things I often think about when it comes to dialogue writing. That and (at least when it comes to writing Rouge's dialogue) my older sister. Just, like, in general. Pay attention to how the people around you speak. It helps a ton when figuring dialogue.

Hellboy is getting mentioned again because Mignola's heavy inks are something I like to look over in order to learn from and improve myself. Hellboy, Carl Barks's Donald Duck comics, Asterix & Obelix, Will Eisner's various works, Calvin and Hobbes ALL have this beauty in their inking that can really inspire. Personally, I'd like to get a bit messier with my inking. Messy inks feel so alive. They're so visually interesting.

For colors, I highly recommend this book. I've read it and re-read it as much as possible. It may be for painters, but cartoonists can and should learn from all kinds of art forms. The works of Moebius were also mega foundational for me in learning how to color my comics. The man knew his palettes and how to not confine himself too much to what's "realistic". Speaking of painters (you may roll your eyes at this one) I'm also a fan of Frank Frazetta.

For panelling, I only have one true inspiration, and that's the work of Tess Stone. I grew up reading Hanna Is Not A Boy's Name. It changed how I viewed the limitations of panelling forever. Of course, it may be harder to find that comic these days, so here's a snippet:

Basic advice: really really take your time taking in art that you like, and try to reverse-engineer how it was made in your head. Heck, even if there's art you DON'T like, overall, but has elements you DO like, you can learn from that, too!

Okay! Sorry for rambling! Now here's the thing you're actually here for:

How To Think When You Draw collection of REALLY GOOD tutorials for whatever you need, these guys helped me out a ton when I was figuring the jungle scenes early in Infested.

This Pinterest Which Has Absolutely Everything You Can Possibly Think Of For References And Inspiration Sources.

An Extremely Good Font Site That Is Used By Professionals In The Comics Industry To Letter Their Comics.

The Most Important Book Any Cartoonist Can Read

A Different Book By The Same Man About Making Comics (for free, thanks Internet Archive)

Perspective For Comic Book Artists, thanks again Internet Archive

As for workflow... Man, I wish I could give you any kinda advice on that. I'm struggling with it, myself. I guess I've got two things?

If you have multiple deadlines for, say, multiple commissions or something, or you're trying to put out a weekly comic, but you're also doing something else, break the day up into time slots for each project, and switch the moment it's time to. Keep yourself on that schedule. I'm not very good at this.

I draw pretty detailed thumbnails, so sometimes I'll skip the penciling step in comics and blow up the thumbnail to ink over that. It's faster for sure! It's not always the right solution, however.

Thanks for reading! I hope any of what I've said helps at all!

[astrotruther]

The problem with manifestation tumblr

Spiritual bypassing wrapped in capitalism & consumerism

This will be my last post. It’s something I've been wanting to talk about for a while. I’m not deleting anything — I’m happy with the astrology I’ve shared and I hope it finds whoever needs it. → Masterlist

If you follow the spiritual side of tumblr, you’ve probably seen posts on dream reality, manifestation, being the It girl or that girl—most of them recycling the same ideas. On the surface, it all looks aesthetic & empowering—quotes in cool fonts, moody photos & affirmations. But the more you look at it, the more it starts to look like the same oppressive social standards—just cosplaying as enlightenment.

Let’s start with the obsession with looks. While beauty can be a ritual, a way to honor yourself, what I see in these posts is something else entirely. It’s not self-love—it’s a rebranded form of consumerism and comparison.

People are idealizing celebrities / models / influencers—who, by the way, have full-time stylists, makeup artists, personal trainers, access to cosmetic dermatologists, nutritionists, professional photographers, photoshop editors etc. Even they don’t look like their photos in real life. That “effortlessly perfect” look? It’s a job. It's production. Not be mean but the most mid-looking person can become a celebrity with the right amount of connections & money.

Speaking of money, there’s this hyper-fixation on being a millionaire, manifesting designer things etc. And I have to ask: When did manifesting become a competition to become the richest, most "luxury" version of yourself?

Manifestation is a spiritual process rooted in inner alignment and honest, embodied living. It’s not about pretending you’re rich while ignoring your emotional wounds. It’s not about bypassing reality or skipping the very human steps of growth, grief, healing, or patience. There’s an overemphasis on avoiding your current reality—which just feels like being told you’re not enough, but with moon emojis and affirmations slapped on top.

I have desires too. Sure, I’d love my hair to grow longer and fuller, but not once have I thought Blake Lively is better than me. (And I’m not even talking about recent controversies—I’m entirely opposing celebrity culture.) I don’t want these people anywhere near my spiritual work. Strip away the manufactured looks, and you’ll find so much ugliness: plagiarizing from smaller artists, scamming their own fans, and more. Their "bag" is often built on exploitation.

They’re the biggest propagators of consumer culture, so let’s treat them as such. Enjoy the product—watch their films, bop to their music—but don’t make their lives (which you know nothing about) your "dream reality".

I’m not trying to gatekeep spirituality. But when self-worth becomes based on how closely you resemble a Pinterest vision board, that’s not spirituality—that’s a coping mechanism. This discourse should be more nuanced, such as:

"You don’t need to be perfect to be powerful."

“There’s nothing wrong with refining your looks or taking care of yourself. Just don’t let consumerism convince you that beauty is one-size-fits-all. Your unique beauty doesn’t need to be informed by whatever celebrity the algorithm is currently hyping.”

"You’re still magnetic even when you’re soft, sad, or unseen."

🌻 What Might Help:

If you’ve been spiraling because you don’t look like the aesthetic girl in your feed, or you’re tired of pretending to feel "high-vibe" all the time—here’s something to remember:

Being true to yourself is more powerful than being glamorous.

Authenticity will always outlast aesthetic trends.

That’s where real magic lives—not in whether you’re "that girl", but whether you’re the realest version of you: messy, honest, alive.