#when people interact with me I message them to go away or unlike my content or whatever | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rollercoasterwords · 2 years

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algorithms are destroying the world make your own gd decisions about shit

if you hate freedom so much go read a google ads round robin fanfic on ff.n (I think Michelin and Bridgeport are doing the enemies to lovers back and forth rn) or go 😳 at whatever happened to lj

or change all the names and sell your erotica to bellsaplus; just know that the writing is better, and the porn is more diverse on ao3

🥂

(I say porn but JEEZ guys even if you’re reading nothing but gen-fic the writing is still usually trying to say something unlike the useless pap that capitalist “content creators” churn out — to generate clicks in order to generate data on what people do everyday sitting and watching or better—-shopping. that data is then sold to other bidders. please protect the plentiful, the beautiful, the ao3. god knows what anyone would say if they say my ao3 history)

wow ok coming in hot! i'm assuming this message is meant to be like...ranting at me the way u would to a friend on facetime and that the "you" you're yelling at isn't actually me? and i am also going to take a wild guess and say that this is a response to the tiktokification essay i wrote that has escaped its enclosure and is now running wild across tumblr. so.

yes i agree we need to protect ao3 and yes i agree anything made for the sole purpose of getting as many people to click on it as possible is probably going to be pretty soulless but i feel like this rant is maybe getting slightly away from what the original intent of my post so i'm just gonna use this as an opportunity to address a few things i've seen across people's responses that have made me like :/ (warning this gets long lmao)

the tiktokification essay was not intended to be an all-encompassing analysis of the way things are across every fandom space connected to ao3. like. i am pretty secluded over in my little corner of marauders-fandom tumblr and i generally post my little essays expecting maybe like...10-20 people to interact with the post? like, when i post stuff on this blog, it's just because when i start thinking about something i can't really relax until i sit down and write my thoughts out and organize them. so when i'm posting those thoughts on tumblr it usually feels to me like the equivalent of facetiming a friend and rambling at them, except the friend is my little handful of beloved tumblr mutuals <3 anyway, i know the post is called "the tiktokification of ao3" which is a very broad statement, but that's just because i like pithy titles. if i had known it was going to run amok across tumblr i probably would have been a little more intentional with my phrasing, but oh well! what i did do is specify in the post that i was only talking about the marauders fandom, because that's literally the only fandom space that i am a part of. it's interesting to see how widespread the stuff i was talking about seems to be across different fandoms, but for anyone who has interacted with the post to essentially just be like - "ok but this isn't true everywhere/in every case"....cool! that's because i was talking about a phenomenon i have observed specifically within the marauders fandom.

it was also not intended to be me shaking my fist and cursing the youth, nor was i trying to invite like...an "us vs. them" mindset between older and younger members of fandom spaces. this is where i've seen some stuff that's made me a little like...hm. because, ok. i am one of those people who's sort of in-between the like...older versus younger sects of fandom spaces. and so i see the ageism that gets aimed towards older people by a lot of younger teens, and i understand why a lot of older adults are fed up with young fans and feel defensive, and i get that teens can be annoying on the internet. on the other hand, i still very clearly remember when i was an Annoying Teen on the Internet, and it was because i was still just...learning, y'know? like. i was just coming into contact with complex ideas about emotion and morality and relationships and everything, and that is just part of being on the internet together. there will always be shitty people, yes, but there will also always be people learning, and especially when those people are young teens, i personally tend to try and start out by giving them the benefit of the doubt. like, i tried to be clear in the post and also included in the tags (though those do get lost when the post gets spread around) that i wasn't trying to condemn anyone for engaging in the behavior i was talking about, because i do genuinely think that a lot of it is simply coming from a place of not knowing any better. so, while y'all can vent however you want on your own blogs and i do understand the frustration, i just want to make it clear that my own intention was to say - hey! younger marauders fans! here are some things to think about moving forward in how you interact with fic, since you have maybe grown up with only one model of social media, unlike those of us who grew up with the internet (i was literally born the same year google was invented) and have seen various examples of social media and observed how it's changed over the years. and it was also intended to say - hey! older marauders fans! if you're scratching your head and wondering wtf is going on with younger fans, consider that they maybe genuinely do not know better and this might help explain some of the roadblocks when it comes to trying to communicate with each other about our fandom spaces.

i did not intend to imply that there is anything wrong with wanting people to read your fanfiction. this is another thing that like. i might have spent some more time clarifying had i known how many people were going to be reading the post. but i did state very clearly that "those sharing their work online might be seeking community, but that is fundamentally different from seeking an audience." it is completely natural and understandable to want people to read your writing!! i actually made a separate post about this after the tiktokification essay but obviously they're not going around as a pair lol. however, i stand by the statement that writing fanfiction with a goal of going "viral" or just getting as much interaction as possible is not sustainable and will not bring you deep or lasting joy. idk i'm not gonna go on about this here if u want to know my thoughts on social media culture rot u can scroll through my blog i've talked abt it in a few different posts.

i was not trying to say that negativity is a new phenomenon in fandom spaces. a few people have interacted with the essay and said something along the lines of "i disagree with this"/"this isn't accurate" because there always have been and always will be people in fandom spaces who are entitled and rude and criticize fic. which like...cool! i'm sure that's true. i do think you missed the point of the post a little bit. it was specifically about a phenomenon in the marauders fandom involving the way that changes in social media over recent years have fundamentally altered the way we view online interaction, and the way i have observed that bleeding over into the marauders fandom. it wasn't just about general negativity in terms of things like comments and messages so much as it was about how expectations relating to influencer culture and virality have led to things like...people making tiktoks about "jegulus fics i hate" or fics going viral on tiktok and people then interacting with the writers as though they are the ones who made those tiktoks. and granted, i have only really been involved in this fandom for a single year, so maybe i'm just wrong about how new this is! but the tiktok stuff at least can't be older than like...2020. so. i do actually do think it's valid to talk about how changes in social media culture might be affecting the ways people interact with ao3 and fic, and i do think there's more to it than just "people will always be negative and entitled sometimes!"

i was not trying to say that we have a right to treat influencers/people posting shit on other social media sites as though they are products. this is another thing that a few people have felt the need to add on, which...okay. nothing wrong with wanting to clarify that. again, if i'd known the post was going to get so much attention, i might have spent some more time talking about it. but i'll just clarify here - my observations about the way capitalism gives rise to an influencer culture that essentially leads to viewing people as products are just that. they are observations. they are not normative statements. just because i understand why we interact with influencers like that does not mean that i think we should interact with influencers like that. however, there is a difference in an influencer whose job is content creation on social media versus an ao3 writer, and the purpose of my essay was to talk about that. saying "we shouldn't treat ao3 writers this way" does not mean "but we SHOULD treat all influencers this way."

anyway, as i warned at the beginning, this got very long -- and honestly, each of these points could probably be its own separate essay, but....i'm tired rn lol. i know that most of the people reblogging the tiktokification essay probably will not come all the way to my blog and run across this post, but i'm just leaving it here because i get grumpy easily and it's annoying to see people misinterpreting or missing the point, so i want to have all the little things i've thought about addressing in one place.

and anon - the main reason i say you may have been getting slightly away from the original point is just

1 - it had nothing to do specifically with porn, and that seems to be mostly what you're talking about? which like. real. but also just wasn't really part of the original post lmao

2 - you seem pretty angry, which again is valid, but i'm just...not. like i feel like u came into my inbox wanting to rant back and forth, and the thing is that i wasn't really intending to rant in that essay! like i said, i'm not necessarily angry at the people i've seen asking for algorithms, because i think a lot of them genuinely don't know better because they have only ever used social media that is algorithm-based, and to me that's mostly just sad and something i wanted to pick apart and piece back together like a puzzle, so. apologies for hijacking your rant to as an excuse to write a whole 'nother essay lmao i appreciate ur energy tho <3

#this got!! so long!!#but it's essentially just me clarifying shit #that i didn't clarify in the original essay #because i was not expecting it to get so much attention #so...here we are lol #ask #ranting and raving

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lovelyxsakura · 2 years

Text

Surprise!

↬ baji keisuke x reader x matsuno chifuyu ↫

↣ syn: chifuyu’s birthday is approaching, leaving you to ponder on what would be a good gift. luckily, keisuke has a great idea.

↣ (f/c) favorite color, (y/n) your name

↣ word count: 4,038

↣ tw: voyeurism, anal, begging, thigh riding, cuckolding, threesome, cunnilingus, face-sitting, face-fucking, degradation, dirty talk, double penetration, edge play, choking

↣ a/n: hello! i’ve been gone for a while but i’m finding more time to write. this is my first fanfic including tokyo revengers characters so i’m sorry if they seem too ooc. also, i’m aware that some feel uncomfortable with nsfw content including baji, which is completely understandable. if you are one of these people, i kindly ask that you skip this story here. all of the characters presented in this piece are aged up!

minors do not interact (18+ only!)

Winter wasn’t particularly your favorite season. On top of the frightful snow, you had much more to worry about including school, work, Chifuyu’s birthday-

A gasp slipped from your lips as you jolted awake from your daydream. The legs of your chair let out a screech as you pushed your body away from the block of wood in front of you. An array of textbooks were spread out across your desk, a vexatious reminder of finals coming up. You brought your fore and middle fingers up to your temples, soothing the oncoming headache by rubbing in circular motions. When the ache dulled, you removed your fingers and pushed all of your work to the side.

The top right drawer of your desk creaked upon being tugged by its handle. Your phone was the first thing that caught your attention, perched on top of some miscellaneous books you used for class. Picking it up, you noticed the screen brighten, displaying a plethora of notifications. Throughout the madness, Baji’s contact caught your eye. You clicked on his name, opening up the text message.

Today 8:43

you busy?

An ugly snort fills the room before your fingers instantly start whipping up a reply. You check the time before sending it off.

Today 10:57

well, not anymore. I was studying for finals. Something you should be doing too.

Baji and studying would never go into a sentence together, you could practically hear his laughter through your phone screen as the speech bubble appeared.

meet me outside.

A beat passed.

and hurry, it’s fuckin freezing.

You rolled your eyes and turned your head to gaze out the window, it was a clear night with the moon shining brightly. It’s somewhat late, but before you could even think about declining Baji’s offer, your stomach snarled. A few mumbled curses toppled over your lips as you stood up and stretched. Palms reaching towards the ceiling, back curved in a slight arch.

A full-length mirror hung on the back of your door. You examined your outfit in it; (f/c) sweatpants, and a black hoodie that you never remembered buying--it’s probably Baji’s. Grabbing the closest pair of shoes, you slipped them on and dropped your keys into the shallow pants pocket. Your hand grasped the doorknob, twisting it then stepping through once it was open. It closed behind you quietly, careful not to create too much noise. The combination of the dark night and the dim hallway lights made you feel uneasy, but your mind was at fault for creating scary, unlikely scenarios. You took long, calculating strides down each of the halls. The quickened pace made it possible for you to reach the heavy, metal doors swiftly. You grunted when you felt the weight of the entrance against your shoulder, but all complaints left your mind when the frigid air engulfed your body.

“Shit,” you cursed, arms quickly flying up to hug yourself. From your position right outside the building, you could see the side of Baji’s face. He wore his hair a little longer than he did in high school, it was down to the center of his back. Noticeably taller, he stood at around six feet two inches and nearly towered over you. His jawline was more defined making him look a bit older than he was–twenty-two. The blue light from Baji’s device casted a soft illumination over his features, it was a serene sight.

“Boo,” you exclaim unenthusiastically as you walk up to his side. He immediately looks up and tackles you in a hug.

“Aww,” you coo. “Did you miss me?”

Baji just rolls his eyes in fake annoyance, eyes zeroing in on ‘your’ hoodie.

“That’s not mine,” he states, pointing a finger at it accusingly while his eyebrows quiver in suspicion. You tug on the edges to inspect the pattern. There was nothing special about the hoodie initially, until you spotted tiny paw shaped prints at the bottom.

You shrug, “I guess it’s ‘Fuyu’s then.” He just smirks in response.

Baji silently starts his path to the running car a few feet away. You follow close behind, hopping into the passenger’s seat when he opens the door for you. It takes a few seconds for him to shut the door and walk around to his side. The vehicle is old, rust building up on the lower right side and a sizable crack splitting the driver’s side window.

“Fuyu’s birthday is in a few days,” you start, barely giving your boyfriend time to settle in comfortably. “I was thinking about what I, or we, should get him.”

The male grunts, moving his hands in front of the busted heaters in an attempt to warm up. There’s a few seconds of awkward silence before he retorts.

“That’s actually why I texted you. I have a great idea.”

You had an unpleasant feeling about this.

December nineteenth approached a lot faster than you anticipated, it felt like you didn’t even have enough time to mull over Baji’s words. Even though you had finally come to a mental agreement on the proposal, you still had doubts about it. Hopefully, this wouldn't be something any of you would regret. Losing any type of relationship with your boys would crush your heart.

You stared at your reflection in the mirror, smoothing over the (f/c) dress once, twice, three times before sighing heavily. After a little celebratory party for Chifuyu, Baji would drive you both back to their shared apartment. The air will definitely feel weird and cumbersome. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all. What was Baji thinking? Fortunately, there was still time to back out and salvage your close friendship with Chifuyu. You picked your phone up from the bed, navigating the screen to the green speech bubble icon. Baji’s contact was pinned to the top, making it easy for you to open the message thread and ferociously start typing. Before you could get any further, however, there was a thunderous knock that reverberated through your apartment. Chewing on your bottom lip, you exited the bedroom and strode over to the front door. You were disgruntled by Baji’s punctuality.

“You’re early.”

He simpered, appearing pleased by your annoyance. “Just came to make sure you’re not chickening out,” he teased, inviting himself in and making himself cozy on your couch. Baji wore a crisp, black suit. The first few buttons of his white undershirt were undone, and his (f/c) tie was haphazardly fixed. You wondered if he had slipped a similar colored tie to Chifuyu so you could all match.

“I’m not going to ‘chicken out’ I'm just…nervous I guess,” you mumbled, moving to sit next to him on the sofa.

Baji hums in acknowledgment, completely understanding of your concerns. He wraps his arm around your shoulder, pulling you in for a side hug. You rest your head on his chest.

“Are you sure about this? Be honest with me Keisuke.” There’s a casual pause.

“I’m sure baby, he’ll want this.” He trusted Chifuyu more than anyone else in the world. “He’ll want you,” he adds.

You were still a nervous wreck, but less dubious.

“Now, before you start worrying your pretty little head again, we should probably get going.”

You nodded, releasing yourself from Baji’s embrace in favor of grabbing your coat. After taking one last glance at your outfit, you both walked out of the door and made your way down to the car. It was going to be a long night.

The venue was nice, very meticulous and not at all what you were expecting. A few rectangular shaped tables were lined up against the windows, already adorned with gifts. A vibrant dance floor covered a vast section of the place. The dining side was decorated with round tables dressed in white tablecloths, and a mini bar. But the star of tonight’s show was unquestionably Chifuyu. You saw him often, considering he and Baji were roommates, but he rarely dressed up. His suit was a deep gray, almost black, shade. The tie that was wrapped around his neck neatly matched your (f/c) dress perfectly.

“‘Fuyu! Happy birthday!” You giggled in excitement. Both of his arms wrapped around your body, enveloping your figure in a tight hug. You were sure he was blushing. The embrace lasted a gawky amount of time, only to be broken by Baji clearing his throat. You gave Chifuyu a sincere smile and placed the cheesy birthday bag on one of the tables nearby. The three of you split up, you ventured off to find Hinata and Emma while they headed to converse with friends. It only took a few seconds before you spotted the girls at the bar. You leisurely headed their way, making sure to greet some friends you’d seen along the way. Hinata and Emma lifted their drinks in a welcoming manner as you situated yourself into the high barstool.

“Want a shot?” Emma yelled over the music. She signaled for the bartender before you could even respond.

Roughly seven drinks in and practically the entire crowd was out on the dance floor. The vibrations of the music and mix of alcohol coursed through your body. You kept making eye contact with Chifuyu, but with every drink it got a little less cloddish. When he finally had a moment of free time, he made his way over to you. You turned around upon feeling a hand on your waist, but you were relieved to find it was just Chifuyu.

“Hey birthday boy!” You slurred, placing a small peck on his flushed cheek. He blushed and muttered out a sheepish ‘hey.’ His tie was loosened a bit, his top button was undone, and you could see some sweat drenching areas of his shirt. Chifuyu looked around before meeting your eye,

“W-would you care to dance?” He stuttered.

You smiled and swung your arms around his neck. His hands rested comfortably on your waist. It was a slower song playing at this point, so it was more of a relaxed sway.

“You look really nice tonight.” His mouth slides up into a boyish smile that melts your heart.

“Thank you,” you hum in appreciation. Your right-hand slides over his chest while your left moves up to play with his hair. “You look as handsome as ever.”

Chifuyu squeals in elation, though it’s subtle.

“Tired?” You question. He doesn’t respond, instead just slides your body closer to his. The action leaves your brain buzzing.

“Hmm, don’t worry, we’ll be out of here soon.”

You unintentionally lied when you said soon. It was at least another few hours before the three of you were waving everyone off. You and Baji carried the bulk of Chifuyu’s things to the car before heading off to the apartment. Baji drove with you sitting in the passenger’s seat. His hand rested on your thigh, and Chifuyu watched the interaction between you two from the backseat.

“So…” you trailed off, wondering if it was okay to break the silence.

“Baji and I we-” he glances at you before training his eyes back on the road. “We’ve got one more thing for you tonight, yeah?”

Chifuyu nods skeptically, and the rest of the drive is completely silent. When you guys reach the apartment, you all silently agree to unpack everything tomorrow, and rush to the elevator. Your nerves were starting to act up again, and Chifuyu was unnaturally quiet. The elevator ‘dinged’ and Baji walked off first. You both followed. As soon as you all were in the apartment, Baji kissed you, forcefully pushing you up against the door. It was heated, vigorous, almost like you’d been teasing him all night. He pulled your left leg up around his waist before deepening the kiss. Neither of you pulled back until the need for air was too great. Chifuyu stood off in the back, shuffling from foot to foot.

“Chifuyu,” Baji dropped your leg and scuffled to your side. He beckoned his friend over.

“Do you want to kiss her?” Poor boy was absolutely speechless, so you pout and grab his hand.

“‘Fuyu please?’ you beg, “I want you to kiss me.”

Baji smirks when the stunned male looks over at him for permission, “Go on.”

Your lips were shiny, and slightly bruised from Baji’s roughness. Chifuyu wastes no time in leaning over, finally allowing his lips to make contact with yours. They’re extremely soft, and the kiss is filled with so much passion you’d think he’s practically in love with you. He is. You tug his tie off and throw it across the room. Softly, you bite down on his bottom lip and the sweetest grunt echoes through your ears. Your tongue slips in his mouth, and he pulls away quickly--a long string of saliva connecting you two.

“I-I don’t...I don’t understand.” He’s fumbling over his words, and you’ve never seen him so flustered.

“I’m gonna let you fuck my girlfriend,” Baji is blunt, too blunt. But he’s worked up and palming his erection through his pants.

“A-And she’s…(y/n) is...you’re okay with that?” He’s looking at you with so much hope and uncertainty in his eyes.

“Yes ‘Fuyu, of course I'm okay with it.” It's quiet for a beat before the birthday boy speaks up.

“Can I kiss you again?” he asks, sounding more confident.

You smile, and instead of giving a verbal response, you yank him down by the collar of his shirt, firmly planting his lips on yours. This kiss felt different from the passionate one you shared just previously. It was fervent, hungry. Chifuyu hesitantly shoves his tongue in your mouth, pulling both of your legs to encircle his waist. It's sloppy, but this is a one in a lifetime chance and you can feel just how excited he is from the way his crotch is pressed up against yours. When you pull back for air, his eyes are completely dazed, and his lips are swollen. He walks over to the couch in the living room and sits down leaving you to straddle his waist. Chifuyu bunches your dress up a little over your waist and sits still. You’re soaked and desperate for any type of stimulation.

“Look at her Chifuyu,” Baji sits down in the chair behind you. “You wanna get off, pretty girl? You know what to do.”

You slide over just a bit, putting all your focus on Chifuyu’s right thigh before you begin to roll your hips. Soft moans leave your lips, leaving him drunk off the sounds. Chifuyu places his hands on your thighs, pushing down and helping you with your motions. He leaves a few pecks on your lips before trailing gentle kisses down your neck.

“Chifuyu please.” You’re whining, yearning for something, anything.

His face is still buried in your neck, biting and sucking at the tender skin there. He’s bouncing his leg, and it’s sending such a pleasurable thrill through your core. You’re humping into his rhythm and it’s pushing you over the edge, just a bit more and-

“Stop,” Baji is serious, filling the atmosphere with such intensity, “She’s not allowed to cum yet.”

Everything stills, you’re gripping onto Chifuyu’s shoulders so hard. You huff, head turning around to steal a peek at Baji. His shirt is completely undone, pants and boxers pulled down to mid-thigh, and he’s ploddingly fisting his cock.

“Can I taste her?” Chifuyu is timid but very much aroused when he asks the question.

Your fingers press on his chest, guiding him to lay down on the couch. You take your underwear off, intending to slip the ruined garment in his pocket before he grabs your wrist. Maneuvering the crotch side to his nose, he inhales deeply, savoring your scent.

“So fucking good…” his voice cracks.

The sound of his resonant voice has you rubbing your thighs together, but it’s doing little to help ease the ache. The thin straps of your dress slip down your shoulder, you let the dress sink to the floor.

“Isn’t she just amazing? Go ahead princess, sit on his face, give him what he wants”

You blush and Chifuyu is palming himself through his pants while drinking in the sight of your bare body. Your right leg is squashed between his face and the cushions, and your left leg is in an awkward position hanging off the side of the couch. His arms hook over your thighs, urging you down, and you’re a little insecure about the weight but the fervor in his eyes makes you feel so much better. You’re slowly moving to sit on his face, and he cranes his neck to meet you halfway. His tongue lies flat against your lips, and he drags it up to circle your clit. He’s pulled you to a full seat on his face, and his mouth is spending time sucking and licking in all the right places. You set a slow, languid pace to move your hips in tandem with his ministrations. You play with your pert nipples, pinching and twisting while Chifuyu’s tongue dips in and out of your pussy. When you catch his eye, you could tell he’s gone, so lost in pleasuring you and hearing you moan for him. Your humps get more and more desirous as you approach your high. You tug on his hair, throwing your head back as your moans increase in volume. Chifuyu has your panties wrapped around his dick, bucking up into his hand at the same tempo of your hips.

“‘F-Fuyu please! Please let me cum, wanna cum for you.” You’re pleading, begging.

“Fuckin slut wants to cum yeah?” Baji's voice is strained, and you know he’s close too. “Cum then.”

And the cord snaps, you’re twitching, coating Chifuyu’s face in your slick. He's groaning but it’s muffled by your thighs. You’re out of breath, and it takes you a minute to realize the Baji had reached his high too. His clothing completely covered in cum. Your body is thrilled, you lean back and help Chifuyu sit up. He looks embarrassed by the amount of cum running down his chest and pooling around your panties, but you find it amusing that he came just from eating you out. Deep breaths fill the room as you guys recover from your orgasms.

Baji recovers quickly, you could tell that watching you sit on his best friend’s face unlocked something feral deep inside him. He gets up from his place on the lounge chair and stands directly in front of you. He’s thick, veiny, embellished with a flushed pink tip in need of attention. He scoops your hair up into a makeshift ponytail, you open your mouth expectantly.

“Such a good little slut, always ready to please me, always ready to suck me dry, ain’t that right princess?”

A sedated thrum rumbles through you at his words. You stick your tongue out and swirl it around his tip. He groans, enjoying the tease, but tugs on your hair to stop you.

“Stay real still for me princess.” He uses his free hand to pat your cheek.

Stepping closer to you, he smears the fluid from his tip onto your lips, and you obediently open your mouth. Baji slides his cock onto the dip of your wet vessel, and it’s heavy, but you love the feel of him. You peer up at him through your lashes, his head is thrown back, body relishing in the feel of your mouth. The pace he sets at first is agonizingly slow, he’s barely pulling out before slipping his cock all the way back into your mouth. His girth has you gagging a bit every time he bottoms out. The hand buried in your hair tightens right before he speeds up, firmly holding you in place. He’s thrusting at an awkward angle, body slanted forward a bit and right to his tippy toes when he’s hitting the back of your throat. His thrusts gain more power behind them, balls nearly hitting your chin with each motion. Breaths become more ragged as he gets closer to his high.

“Gonna cum baby,” he says. “Better swallow everything I give you.”

Your moan sends vibrations traveling up his cock. He’s holding your head in a vice grip before spilling his seed down your throat. You swallow it and stick your tongue out for show.

“Good girl,” he praises breathlessly.

You crawl over to Chifuyu, who’s sprawled out on the couch, lazily playing with himself. Pushing his hand out of the way, you replace it with yours, continuing the slothful pace he was working at. Baji gently nudges your body so that you’re lying on top of Chifuyu. He rubs on your ass, then lands a resounding smack on it, an involuntary yelp leaves your mouth. Your boyfriend spreads your cheeks, licking a long stripe from your pussy lips all the way to your asshole. Your hand tightens around Chifuyu’s cock, and his hands fly to your wrist. Baji sucks on two fingers before slowly inserting them into your asshole.

“K-Keisuke, fuck.”

His fingers are stocky and fill up your puckered hole snuggly. He wiggles them, scissoring them in and out. You kiss Chifuyu, moaning into his mouth while Baji continues to add more fingers to your ass.

“Almost ready babe, think you can take it?”

“Y-Yes,” your voice shakes.

He stands up, shedding his remaining clothing. You sit back on your knees to allow Chifuyu to do the same. Chifuyu lays back down onto the couch and waits expectantly. You straddle his waist pussy hovering directly over his crotch, and when you sink down onto him, he nearly explodes from the feeling of your gummy walls

“Fuck.” It’s a long, drawn-out moan. “Feels so good,” he slurs.

Baji gives you a minute to get comfortable before you feel his tip nudging your other hole.

“Relax for me babe,” he says before pushing his cock into your tight hole. You’re drooling, full to the brim with your two favorite boys. As he’s bottoming out, your body starts shaking, and twitching violently.

“Ah~ cumming! I'm cumming!” Your eyes are tightly shut, and you rut against Chifuyu to ride out your high. They’re both still as your struggle to catch your breath. Baji is the first to move, humping into you, moving you along Chifuyu’s dick too. Chifuyu whines, lifting his hips up into the motions. They set a nice rhythm that leaves you squeezing Chifuyu’s arms.

“I-It’s too much,” your words are jumbled together, “G-Gonna- ‘m gonna cum again.”

Baji’s hand comes up to clutch your neck. He applies pressure, and you just about lose it when you feel Chifuyu’s fingers play with your clit.

“So pretty…you’re so pretty,” Chifuyu is spouting endless praises as he watches you come undone on both of them.

“Like that baby? Like getting fucked by two cocks at the same time?” You whine, and he slaps your ass again. Chifuyu chokes on his spit when you clench around him from the impact, “Fuckin whore.”

You’re close and they can both feel it.

“Cum for us baby, know you can do it, you’re such a good girl.”

Chifuyu leans up to kiss you, and you scream into his mouth, liquid making a mess on Chifuyu’s chest.

“Fuck,” he follows right after you, spilling his seed into your fucked out pussy.

After a few more thrusts, Baji pulls out of your ass, pimping himself a few more times before shooting his load on your backside. You feel Chifuyu soften as you lift yourself off of him and lay down on his chest. Baji disappears for a second, coming back with a towel. He wipes his cum from your backside and your pussy before rolling you over so he can clean up the mess between you and Chifuyu.

Chifuyu picks you up and walks into Baji’s room where he lays you down. He situates himself behind you, hugging your waist and pulling you into him. Baji follows a few minutes later, facing you with a smile on his face.

“How are you feeling?”

“I feel great.” Baji kisses your forehead, and you start to drift off to sleep. “Happy birthday ‘Fuyu.”

424 notes · View notes

crown-anon · 3 years

Note

aah i thought of a req!!!!! could i maybe request one shots or hcs (separate) w dream, sapnap, n wilbur with a s/o (preferred he/him!!) who draws a whole lot,, n one day they catch him drawing him?? tysm :]

@ghcstbnr asked

gn i just realized i made a typo i meant cc catching reader drawing them- but ty again :)

of course! it's kind of long, sorry about that

I took a little creative liberty with the notion of "catching you drawing." also Sapnap's looks kind of long but it's also dialogue heavy. if you want me to redo it, I will. hope you like it 💗

& a note to everyone else, I don't write for Wilbur yet! I only write for the dream team at this time. sorry about that! this will probably change in the future, though, so look out 👀

CW: swearing

format: one-shot

people: dreamwastaken, Sapnap

pronouns: dreamwastaken's piece is ambiguous, Sapnap's piece uses he/him

edited 27 April 2021

—

dreamwastaken

since he doesn't use his camera, you find yourself with your boyfriend in the studio more often than not. when he's gaming casually, you play together, or one of you will cheer the other one on. when he's streaming, sometimes you interact with the viewers, or read donations for him; sometimes you just sit next to him, soaking up his energy and warmth. when he's working long days and long nights to edit videos, you're content with just relaxing together in the same space. at times you have to drag him out to the kitchen to eat, or help him to bed if he passes out, but…he's really cute when he's focused. (and you're starting to think he does it on purpose just so you can dote on him.)

today is a little different. he's recording for a manhunt that's meant to drop in a couple days. you're quiet, trying to avoid disrupting them. you're perched up on the loveseat, staring fondly at him across the room. he's so animated, the way his eyes shine when he talks to his friends, how he tears up when he laughs…

Patches mews at you from the arm of the couch, as if to say, disapprovingly, I cannot believe how sickeningly sweet your inner monologue is.

and you try to understand where she's coming from, you really do, but the sun's starting to set, and the gentle rays slotting through the blinds are shifting from white to gold.

he looks so divine, you decide. it's unfair. how could I not love him? he's seriously pretty. and before you can stop yourself, you're sketching him out on your tablet. you glance up at him fast to get the details right, and look away just as quickly. he never meets your eyes. soon your whole page is covered in little Clays, capturing the way he feels, the way he acts, the way you feel about him. Patches jumps off the chair, with all the moving. and before you know it, you've drawn up a whole page of concept art of your unfairly beautiful boyfriend. Patches was right about me, you muse to yourself.

fuck. Patches. the same Patches who's been meowing at you for the better part of an hour, now sitting patiently at the door? there's no way Clay didn't pick up on all that noise, you fret. but he's still playing, looking intense as ever. relief washes over you, replacing the guilt.

come here, girl, you think to yourself, knowing Patches wouldn't have even understood you if you spoke. sorry to keep you waiting. and you rise, slipping quietly out the door with his cat in your train.

—

you're coming back to the studio. Patches, fed and sated, is napping in another room. opening the door, you have to stop yourself, you freeze. your boyfriend's kneeling on the ground, sitting on his heels, right next to the door—you'd have hit him if it opened any further.

"baby, what are you…" the words die on your tongue.

my book. my sketchbook. my sketchbook full of drawings of him. shit, he's gonna think I'm such a simp! the embarrassment, the shame, the fear, it's overwhelming you.

you hear your voice break. "…what happened to recording…?"

"finished half an hour ago," he says simply.

and that was that. for the first time in ages, the silence hanging between you was thick and heavy with tension. you wait. and wait. and wait. you wait for the criticism, the hate, the argument that never comes.

suddenly, he seems content with what he's seen, when he looks up at you adoringly, and takes one of your hands, giving it a soft squeeze. "is that…me?"

you've lost your voice, all you can do is nod.

"you…you think I'm beautiful?" he glows.

ah, I suppose I did write that, somewhere in there. you look away. all the things I've said…

he brings your hand up to his lips and leaves kisses on your knuckles.

you sound small. "do I not tell you that enough?" you pause. "that you're beautiful? that I love you?"

and just like that, his nervousness dissolves into euphoria. you both start laughing at the same time.

"oh my god—" he wheezes. "—you're so sappy."

"only for you," you blurt out, and start laughing harder. but he quiets, he hesitates.

"only for me," he repeats.

you sink down onto the floor next to him. he's staring so fondly at you, you can't help but smile back.

"only for you," you affirm.

he rests his hands on your knees, pulling himself closer to you. he's so close to you, you can feel his blush. you let your eyes close, softly.

but the kiss never comes. instead, you're met with a "then what about all those drawings of Patches?"

laying on the floor, tangled up in each other, in hysterics, you distantly think I hope he remembered to leave the call from recording earlier.

—

over dinner, you meet his gaze, and he gives you that look. that stupid, handsome look; the one with the smile and the danger behind his eyes. he makes a point of pausing mid-bite, but it takes you a minute to notice that he's stopped eating.

"what's up, honey?" you ask, sounding a little more concerned than you should have been.

he shrugs dramatically. "oh, nothing…just figured you'd appreciate a muse." there it was. the teasing. you knew it would happen eventually. but the tone, it's kind, it's tempting; gentle, unlike a serious jab.

so all you do is roll your eyes, but you can't help the way your mouth quirks into a smile. "you're so dumb," you murmur with affection, and shake your head at nothing in particular.

Patches curls her tail around your ankle as she passes you by.

—

on the couch hours later for movie night, you're the last one up. Patches is curled up in Clay's lap, purring. Clay, in turn, sleeps soundly in your lap. (you think if he could purr, he would, but he settles for humming softly when you play with his hair.) you might think it's funny looking back on it later, but it feels so tender and vulnerable now. you like calm evenings like this one. Studio Ghibli plays quietly on the flatscreen; you don't know which one, you're not really paying attention anymore.

you're busy tracing the contours of Clay's skin, feeling more than seeing his shape in the dark room. mapping him out in your mind, learning his figure like you're seeing him for the first time again. you think you understand him a little bit better, every day you spend together. and with confidence, you make your first stroke, illuminated by the moon.

—

Sapnap

you only barely stop yourself from drawing a big "X" across your paper. exhale, and start erasing furiously. don't rip the paper—well, we didn't need that sheet anyway. ball it up and throw it at the dark, cobwebbed corner of the room. along with the rest of your mistakes.

you're trying. you're really trying. but those lips. his fucking lips. fuck.

your boyfriend smiles at the camera as he gets a donation with a sweet message on it. it should be so easy. he's right there. right here.

you check the time. it's been an hour. you've been trying, and miserably failing, to get his lips right for an entire hour. today, at least. you scoff at yourself, your misery, and pinch the bridge of your nose. it isn't fair.

his camera's on, and he's live, so you know you can't be in there with him. nobody knows you're together, and you don't want know what kind of backlash to expect if people found out. so you've been avoiding his streams…the whole room where he streams, really.

you've kept yourself busy by drawing. and you've cycled through many subjects in your life, and eventually, been able to draw whatever you put your mind to with enough time and effort. the problem is, your sights have been set on Sapnap, even for months before you got together. okay, maybe that isn't the problem. the actual problem is that you fucking suck at drawing him.

you get going, start it out, do an okay job, but midway through screw it all up somehow. to make things worse, your reference is his 2D image. he doesn't…know that you draw him. you're terrified to say. so you can't use the real life Sapnap as a reference, like you would prefer.

ugh, and this one's ruined too. you rip it up and throw it at your growing pile of paper balls, but being tiny confetti-sized pieces of paper, they don't make it very far. great, something else to clean up later, you huff at your own thoughts. it isn't fair.

—

"[name]?" he calls for you. you're one step ahead, already opening the door. you can't remember when you got here and decided to brood outside his room.

"hey, do you think you can—" he tears his eyes from his camera, his waiting audience, to look up at you expectantly. when he sees you he stops immediately, looking concerned, standing to meet you.

"what is it?" your voice is flat.

out of view of the camera, he mouths, are you okay? you only shrug and avert your eyes.

he falters, contemplates, sits back down at his desk and starts to talk to his viewers. "hey guys, I'm sorry for the short notice, but I gotta cut this stream short. my…" he glances at you for approval, only to see you motioning with your hands as if to say, no, don't.

(you yourself don't really know what for. no, don't end the stream for me? no, don't out us like this?)

he looks back. "…my friend…something came up with my friend. I have to take care of it. it's really important." you can tell he has trouble finding the right words. you can tell it throws him off, he's acting out of character for his internet personality. do you blame him? isn't this your fault? "sorry again. bye guys!"

the second he made the last click, he gets up and pulls you into a hug. it's unexpected, it knocks the wind out of you. you're certain he feels the tension.

"babe…what's wrong?" it's muffled by your neck and the sweater you're wearing. you just hold him, saying nothing.

he pulls away and holds you by the shoulders. "look at me. what's wrong?"

you feel all the more embarrassed. it's so silly to be upset about. "I…I…well, it's a lot."

he shakes his head, to say I'm not going anywhere, but his expression softens, his grip loosens. "do you want to talk about it?"

you sigh. "it started as 'I can't draw for shit', then it became 'why am I afraid of asking you for help?', and finally, worst of all, 'why the fuck can't we be seen together?' it isn't fair. it's never been fair. I'm sorry."

he thinks about it for a second. "okay, what makes you feel like we can't be seen together?"

"are you joking?" you snap. "we're two fucking boyfriends. in this society." he didn't look hurt by the outburst, but the guilt crept in anyway. "…I'm sorry."

he shakes his head, "do you really think I'd let that happen? I wouldn't ever let anyone hurt you, darling. remember that."

"I know, I know…" you don't know what to say. "it's easy to forget, I guess."

"what are you afraid to ask me for help about?"

"I…" shit, you guess you have to tell him. close your eyes, breathe, "I've been drawing you. trying to draw you. but I can't, it never turns out right."

you peek, and he's red in the face, stuttering. "me? you draw me? of all the hot people out there?"

you furrow your eyebrows at him. "don't give me that shit. you know you're cute."

he shakes his head incredulously. "are we talking about the same person here?"

"dude, your smile is literally the most radiant fucking force of nature I have ever seen."

"you're hot too! why are you coming after me?"

"I'm not 'coming after you', you're being defensive about your looks, when you shouldn't be! you're gorgeous, baby."

you're both giggling like girls at a sleepover, the anger and frustration long forgotten. now it's a war of who can be more grossly in-love with the other.

"what part of me," he manages between laughs. "are you having trouble drawing?"

"oh god," you groan, remembering yourself and your dilemma. "your lips."

"my fucking lips? you would think that—"

"no," you warn. "shut up. don't say it. don't you dare say it."

he leans in close, his hands have moved up to cup your face. you shiver.

"don't worry," he grins. "I won't."

the kiss is long and sweet, nothing like the ones you've shared in the past. he takes his time, you savor each other. you feel time stop ticking, you feel your heart stop beating, you feel the way he tilts his head. you grab him by the collar of his shirt and pull him in. and when you part, you're breathing heavy, in tandem.

"thanks," you manage. "but I needed to see your lips, not kiss you into next saturday."

"nah," he laughs. "I think you needed that too."

you choose your words thoughtfully. "do you need me, too?"

he hums, and—

ding!

dreamwastaken donated $69!

you could die. you could really, seriously die.

the response is instant. you don't even see Sapnap move from you to the PC, flushed down to his neck, apologizing, apologizing, and apologizing again. "change of plans, guys, we're doing an art stream!"

the chat is filled with "huh?"s and "what?"s.

"huh? what?" you didn't have the time to process what just happened.

karljacobs: I thought we were doing a make-out-with-our-secret-boyfriends stream :(

he smiled warmly at you. "yeah. my lovely boyfriend is going to draw me! he's been wanting to for a really long time, and his art is really good. let's go get your stuff."

you're in so much shock that he makes it past you and out of the room, while you stand there waiting. after a pause much longer than you intended, you hurry after him.

—

down the hall, in your room, he's got your sketchbook tucked under his arm, closed. you're sure you left it open when you came out.

you only barely get the words out. "um, did you…go through it? please don't laugh."

your heart sinks when he laughs heartily, but he grabs your hand, resting it on your book, about to hand it off. but he holds you there for a second. "of course not. I respect your privacy." he ponders for a moment. "I respect you."

you can feel the sigh of relief when you let it out. "I…love you."

your holding your book now, as he moves to collect the boxes containing your pens and pencils and colors. he gets them all together, but before he picks them up to head back, he turns around to face you. "is this too much?"

you absently reach for a hand, tracing over the lines on his palms. and you think about it. am I okay? is this too much?

"I don't think so. not with you. I'm okay."

he moves to open the door and grab the rest of your things. "well then, let's not keep them waiting!"

—

edited 27 April 2021

#dreamwastaken x reader #dream x reader #clay x reader #sapnap x reader

158 notes · View notes

zackcollins · 3 years

Text

i can’t sleep without you || penny oleksiak

Author’s Note: Look... She’s the Canadian record holder for most medals at the Summer Olympics. My brain decided that warranted a little piece of writing. I hope I did it and her justice because she truly is an icon. Both for the sport of swimming and for the Oleksiak family. GIF credit to maljic!

Warnings: I don’t think there’s anything! Feel free to let me know if anything should be warned about though. I’ll gladly add a warning for you.

Word Count: 1.5k+

Title: Sleep Without You by Brett Young

Additional: The reader should be gender-neutral. They’re implied to be a swimmer, so I did the best I could. Anyways! I hope everyone enjoys this! Feedback is always welcomed!!

You were humming along to the music filtering through your headphones. On the tray in front of you, you were tapping a pencil against your crossword book. You only had a few words filled in and it was driving you bonkers not being able to figure out some of them. Shifting your attention from the music to the crossword puzzle, you scanned the clues again to see if there were any easy ones that you missed.

5 Down: Layman’s oesophagus

Bopping your head along to the music, you smiled as you wrote ‘throat’ in the appropriate squares. You were grateful that you had found at least one easy clue. Filling out a few more answers that you had somehow missed, you tapped his pencil against the book a second time when you reached a stalemate at one of the remaining clues.

13 Across: Town at Eighth Mile of Boston Marathon

You paused your music, slid your headphones around your neck, turning to your best friend, Penny, beside you. You put the crossword book on the tray in front of her, pointing at the clue.

“You’re a trove of useless knowledge,” You said, “do you know the answer to that?”

Instead of answering, Penny grabbed the pencil and wrote Natick across the correct squares. Smiling, you slid the crossword book back in front of yourself. Penny handed you the pencil, turning back to the movie she was watching on the seat display; it looked like Finding Nemo or Finding Dory if you were to guess.

“Thanks, Penny,” you said, punching her playfully in the shoulder.

Humming, Penny smiled without looking away from her movie. “You’re welcome, babe.”

Leaning over, Penny checked her shoulder against yours. Your mouth went dry, face heating up both from the contact and the fact that Penny had called you what she had called you. Despite yourself, your traitorous body felt gooey and fuzzy. You quickly slid your headphones on, restarting the music. The last thing you needed was Penny to figure out how you felt.

For the rest of the flight to Calgary, you tried to focus on your crossword puzzle and the music you were listening to. You tried not to focus on the lingering gooey and fuzzy feelings the shoulder check and pet name from Penny had caused. Keyword: tried. Even with your music blasted as loud as was safe, you could still hear Penny laughing along to the movie. Every time Penny laughed, the gooey and fuzzy feelings bubbled back up deep within your gut.

When the plane finally landed about an hour later and everyone was disembarking, you kept to yourself. You knew your face was burning as bright as the morning sun after everything that had happened. The last thing you needed was someone to question you about it.

Thankfully, the bus ride to the hotel was without incident. You were also able to finish your crossword. Seeing as Penny was the last person you wanted to interact with right now, you went to Maggie for help. Maggie was concerned as to why you weren't asking Penny because she knew the two of you did everything together but she ultimately helped you when you said that Penny just wanted to rest after the long flight. Though, you were fairly certain you saw Maggie give you a sideways glance once or twice as she was giving you the answers to some of the clues. You couldn't be sure if it was because she didn't believe your story about Penny, or because she thought you were an idiot for not knowing the answers. Either way, you kept quiet and thanked her when the crossword was finished.

When everyone was assigned their rooms, you and Penny were paired together to the surprise of absolutely no one. Penny was talking to you about ways to refine your butterfly stroke when you put the keycard in the door. Walking into the room, you both froze as you dropped your suitcases beside each other.

Looking at each other after a moment, Penny cursed while you ran your hand down your face and around to the back of your neck, sighing.

“One bed,” you said, swallowing thickly. “There must’ve been a mix-up with the room assignments.”

Penny sighed, turning to you. “I’m alright with it as long as you are.”

You noticed something strange beyond the surface of Penny’s eyes; it looked like hope.

Feeling yourself short circuit, you nodded quickly. “Yeah, it’s fine.” Your words felt heavy, nervous. If Penny noticed, she didn’t acknowledge it.

Motioning to the bathroom, Penny began unzipping her suitcase. “I’m gonna take a quick shower. It helps me sleep.”

Feeling your mouth go dry for the second time that night, you nodded. You had seen Penny after a shower plenty of times; this time though, this time felt personal. Intimate. You would be sharing a bed, something that you had dreamt about for a while.

As Penny went to shower, you changed into your pyjamas. Swallowing thickly, you wanted to kick himself for packing nothing more than a pair of loose boxers and a skin-tight undershirt to wear to bed. Normally, that would be sufficient; you always had your bed. Today though, some power that existed made it happenstance that you would share a bed with the woman you had a lunar-sized crush on. In other words, loose boxers and a skin-tight undershirt felt insufficient.

When the bathroom door opened and Penny emerged wearing only sleep shorts and a sports bra, you felt less psychotic for wearing what you were wearing. Shimmying over toward the window, you allowed room for Penny on the side of the nightstand. Penny hummed in appreciation, slipping under the covers. Flicking on the lamp, she rolled over to face you.

“I hope you don’t mind that the lamp is on,” she said, motioning behind her. “Leaving a light on helps me sleep more soundly.”

You could see a blush rising on Penny’s face. Smiling softly, you slid under the cover and fluffed your pillow to get comfortable.

“No,” you said, “I don’t mind.”

You felt your heartstrings tug in different directions when Penny lit up with a genuine smile.

“Night, babe,” Penny yawned, closing her eyes. A few moments later, Penny’s breathing evened out.

“Night, Penny,” you mumbled, rolling over. You closed your eyes, drifting off to sleep after a few minutes. Your mind was transfixed on the fact that Penny had called you a pet name again.

In the morning, you felt warm. Too warm. Your first thought was that you had a fever. You grumbled and shifted around, trying to get comfortable in your newfound heat. That caused another grumble that you decidedly did not utter.

“Stay still, babe,” Penny mumbled, “cuddling you is no fun if you move.”

You sprung up as if you were on fire, looking down at Penny. Penny grumbled leaning on her elbow to look at you.

“Everything okay?” she asked, sounding concerned.

You swallowed, nodding haphazardly. “I’m sorry for invading your space like that.”

Penny ran a hand along your bicep. You shivered, leaning into the touch.

“You didn’t invade anything. I would’ve stopped you if I didn’t like it,” Penny paused.

“You mean...” the cogs started to turn in your head.

Nodding, Penny smiled. “Yes. I have feelings for you. Have had feelings for you for a long time.”

Sitting up properly, Penny cupped your face. On instinct, you brought your hands to Penny's ribcage. Shivering at the contact, Penny leaned in and ghosted her lips over yours. You felt your lips tremble at the feather-light sensation. You leaned in to chase the feeling, lips making contact with Penny's.

You kissed each other for a moment, pulling back when you nibbled on Penny's lower lip. Penny looked blissed and content when you looked into her eyes. She caught you staring and smirked.

Ducking your head, you placed it on Penny’s shoulder. Grabbing your chin, Penny pulled your head up. Looking into Penny's eyes, you could see nothing but tenderness and care staring back at you.

“You have pretty eyes,” you blurted.

Penny's face turned a soft shade of pink as she leaned in, kissing you. The kiss was soft, sweet, and the most meaningful kiss you had ever experienced. Unlike the kisses you had had with people in the past, this kiss with Penny felt like it mattered in the grand scheme of things. It felt right.

Laying down to cuddle some more before practice, you heard one of the phones vibrate on the nightstand. It was Penny's phone that had vibrated but when you went to give it to her, she had already fallen back asleep. You looked at the phone screen and saw that the notification was a text from her brother, Jamie. You knew what Penny's password was because she had trusted you with it ages ago. Sighing, you entered the 6 digits and opened up the text thread to see what Jamie had wanted this early in the morning.

After reading the message, you placed Penny's phone on the nightstand. You kissed her on the forehead before curling around her and drifting off to sleep. The only thing on your mind was that you were grateful that Penny had a brother like Jamie.

To: Coin

From: Giraffe

You're welcome for getting you two a room with one bed. All it cost me was a signed jersey. Now, it better have worked or else I'm flying up to Calgary myself to get you two fools together. Do you understand?

29 notes · View notes

srirachvbi · 4 years

Text

Aran and Aone as dads headcanons !

requested by @kara-grayson04: would you do aone and aran as dads?

a/n: MY BOYS!!! i love these two sm and i actually meant to post smth for aone before but i lost inspiration :((( it was an imagine not headcanons and i struggle to write sometimes-- maybe i’ll rewrite it and post it but idk (it was based off of his concern that people didn’t like to sit next to him on the train) and... aran needs more content !!! i’m literally in love with him... ALSO TIMESKIP ARAN HAS ME 😳👉👈 LIKE THE BEARD??? he looks SO GOOD.. Also.. oh my god im so sorry it took me so long to post these 😭 i literally have no excuse i was just tired

warning(s): manga spoilers

Ojirou Aran

hello sir, your hand in marriage pls <3

He’d be SUCH A GOOD DAD

I have no doubts in my mind that he’d literally be the best husband, father, brother in law, grandfather, uncle, cousin, sibling--

This is me saying that I love Aran and I think he’s perfect

I also think this way about Kita

Kita Shinsuke, and Ojirou Aran, please... your hands in marriage

Osamu too-- he can cook 🥰

But Atsumu??? 🤢🤢

That’s a joke he’s one of my favorite characters

Anyways back to Aran <3

But like him having twins-- one boy and one girl

The amount of dread he had before they were born because all he could think about was what if they turned out like the Miya twins

But!! when they were born and weren't the devils incarnate he was like 🥰🥰

His twins are both super energetic and never sit down

But they're like!! so happy all the time and he just

*heart clench*

He'd literally do anything for them it's so cute

When they were born, he'd spend hours in their room after you went to sleep

He would like cradle them and tell them stories and all that :((

Since he's a pro volleyball player, he wouldn't be able to spend as much time as he'd actually like with them so that's why he'd stay up late just in their room

If they ever start crying in the middle of the night, he'd immediately let you go back to sleep and he'd take care of it !!

He thinks it's fair because you take care of them so much when he's away for games and you also birthed them so like

Whenever he's home, you don't have to do half of the things you normally do

As the twins grow older, you start bringing them to his games and he's like "!!!" cause they're his pride and joy 🥺🥺🥺

He'd show them off to his teammates after the game

Aran would be like "Look!! Here are my two angels who are nothing like the Miyas 🥰🥰"

Atsumu meeting them at MSBY vs Red Falcons cause you had time off from work and the twins wanted to go

The twins knowing what their dad has said about Atsumu and being like "👁️👄👁️ my dad says you're rude" and he just *clenches heart* cause its so cute yet so sad

CAUSE LIKE yeah they're insulting him but the look on their faces is just... so cute

That's kinda masochistic, Atsumu

Actually Atsumu's a lot better than he was in high school as an adult so they do warm up to him, sadly 😔

Aran is definitely the type of guy you see in public with his kids and immediately go like "wow, he's definitely a great father" because he just radiates that energy

okay i do this sometimes idk if others do

He never yells too much at his kids and always talks things out maturely with them and its 🥺🥺

He tries not to spoil them too much but definitely does on accident CJWJCIE

They'll come back from the store and you'll see toys in their hands and you just give him one look and he's like

LISTEN

They're just too damn cute for him to say no to sometimes

But he won't spoil them to the point of them becoming obnoxious!! he knows the limits and has set them !!

When you were pregnant, he was literally so helpful and you just... hardly had to do anything

He wasn't as strict with making you do LITERALLY nothing like Sakusa, but he definitely tried to do everything he could

Absolutely no!! carrying of anything!!

He's a strong volleyball player who was one of the best back in high school-- he refuses to let his wife carry anything !!

All in all, Aran would be the best dad of haikyuu and i would write more but that would be too long

Aone Takanobu

ohmygod

I literally love him so much hes just... his current concern knocked me out

I would sit next to you Aone 😔

anyways

Aone would definitely be a great dad but he'd be a bit aloof unlike Aran would be

He wouldn't really be too sure what to do cause he's scared his own kid would be afraid of him :(

For a while, he'd be extremely hesitant to take care of your guys' daughter because he just :(( he was scared that she would start crying

Turns out his daughter literally is a ball of sunshine who thinks her dad is!! the coolest!!

I mean he's really good at volleyball and he's so BIG 🌟👄🌟

L i k e

He's literally her walking jungle gym-- you can pry this headcanon from my dead body i REFUSE to see anything else

He would be in the kitchen drinking coffee first thing in the morning and suddenly, he hears her tiny footsteps and then theres something weighing down his arm

SURPRISE!!!!! it's Misa!!!!

Forgive me, i was binging Maid-sama

She's all like "dad! dad!!" and then she'll start rambling on and he just

heart clench

You both were such a blessing in his life because neither of you were afraid of him 🥺🥺

Aone and you met during college!!

You guys didn't go to the same college but you met him on the bus hehe

🥰🥰 and you sat next to him without hesitation and actually tried to start a conversation with him because he looked to be a similar age

Now you two are married and have your cute daughter, Misaki 🥺🥺💖

Futakuchi wasn't allowed to babysit her by himself because he said something bad in front of Misa once and she asked about it later to Aone and you at dinner

Futakuchi getting a call from Aone and it's completely silent

He got the message (๑•﹏•)

Hinata is Misa's favorite uncle!!

because Futakuchi said bad words that anyones not supposed to say >:((((

Hinata likes to tell her stories of his interactions with her dad and shes all like ✧\(>o<)ﾉ✧ cause!! her dad's so!! cool!!

Since Aone works in construction (i think), he's super strong so she's always testing his limits

"Dad... can you lift the couch?" "... yes."

He lifts the couch and she's squealing like "WOAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! DADS SO COOL!!!!!!"

stop shes so proud that Aone's her dad and it's just so cute

all of her friends think that Aone's the coolest as well because Misa never stops talking about him!!

"Aone-san, you're so cool!!! Misa-chan was right!!" "RIGHT?? RIGHT?? My dads awesome!!!"

He's never felt so much happiness

When you were pregnant, he was this huge ball of anxiety... the poor thing...

He's super nervous he's gonna accidentally hurt you in some way and so for a while, he refuses to touch you im-

He doesn't know his own strength and if smth happens to you, he will literally die

It took you scolding him for like 20 minutes for him to finally understand

He's still hesitant to hold you when you guys are in bed tho cause he's 😔😔

Aone would definitely struggle at the beginning as a father but he's literally such a great dad after he lets go of his worries!!

476 notes · View notes

thewritingstar · 3 years

Text

Beautiful Revelations

Pairing: Gruvia (I know its been a hot ass min)

Fandom: Fairy Tail

tags: @shellielyzabeth @be-dazzled @nostalgicxslumber @unvalley @tigerfire54

Note: It has happened. I have written 200 fanfics and idk if I should be proud or slightly scared. (feel free to skip this omg why is it so long)

I want to say thank you to everyone who has read, liked, reblogged or interacted with me in any way. I have always had a feeling that no matter what I write, I wouldn’t matter. But every comment and sweet note left made me realize that even if its just a smile or enough to make someone hit the like button, I made a small difference or added something to the fandom. Most of my fics are quick drabbles full of spelling mistakes, random thoughts and love for the characters. I know I don’t write very long stories or finish my wips (why are we surprised) but even though Im not someone people look to as a big author, each of you have made me feel special. There have been many times, this year especially that I had decided to give up writing. “Im not good enough and no one will even notice” Thats what I told myself if I decided to just back away. But every so often I would look and see that someone new or old had read my work. Every time someone reads something I wrote, I go back and read it too. I look at all the tags and see every comment and I stop and smile and remember how much joy it brought me when I first posted.

When I first started writing, I thought that I wouldn’t have a place. Yet in a very short span of time, I was welcomed with open arms and people started to tune in regularly for my fics. I had been given many nicknames such as Gruvia goddess, angst queen, satan (yes I know the fic0 and well even Star.

During my darkest moments, my mind lingered to my writing and to my internet friends. without hesitation I could message someone and feel better and be given the reassure I need. I can't even begin to say how much it means to me that people actually enjoy my writing and even me as a person.

I thank each of you for giving me a joy that was considered a luxury at one point and allowing me to write whatever I wanted and you took it with love and made me happier than I have been in years. To all the people who made art or wrote me something, it means so much to me.

Im not saying that this fic is my greatest but I think it has a special place because It shows the growth over time. 200 fics is a lot and whether or not they were all good, it doesn't matter because I did that and I can say that im proud. Im sorry for all that sappy shit but I wouldn't be where I am without you all.

-Star <3

ps: im not dying or stop writing fics im just happy lol

---

“There is never a time or place for true love. It happens accidentally, in a heartbeat, in a single flashing, throbbing moment.”

― Sarah Dessen, The Truth About Forever

---

It was the nights like these that she hated most. The cold would creep through the blankets and make her shiver as her eyelids hung heavy. She could be ready to rest, let the sweet dreams guide her but instead those dark intrusive thoughts toyed with her like a fly on a freshly woven web. They would sprout out of nowhere, tangled with thorns and hold her mind hostage as it injected its sickly venomized thoughts for the night.

She always wondered how she got this far. She was one of the highest members of Phantom Lord, her abilities had rarely been matched. If she desperately craved, she could walk down the hallways and strike fear into the other members, no one could touch her. Hierarchies became a custom here. Once you made it to the top after clawing your way with blood, sweat and probably more blood, you were a god. Yet she walked in and in the next few minutes she was at the table with the master, already receiving a promise that she was special, a delicate and useful ally for the guild.

Special. What a swollen lie that turned out to be.

Maybe that's why she never bothered to search for a light, something to cure the rain. For every life she had bruised or ended, she wanted to feel the pain that followed. She needed to know the consequence of her actions, to be held accountable for ruining another family or taking something from the innocent. Instead she was celebrated.

The days turned to months and she found herself years later not knowing what anything meant anymore. Life used to be black and white. She would walk the side of the kind and good and now she was treading through a swarm of a morally gray compound.

These restless nights, she loathed them but then again, suffering was something that came naturally to her. The only person to ever knock her down was herself.

She climbed out of bed, fuzzy slippers over her feet as she walked to the bathroom. Her headache had worsened and she stared into the mirror. She had looked at herself a thousand times but… have her eyes always been that blue? No, she was tired and her vision was fuzzy, she was fine. Cold water came to her hands as she turned on the facet and splashed her face. Everything was the same as it always was. Expect for today.

Her order was simple. Defeat whoever stood in her way and make sure the Phantom Lord got Lucy Heratfilia. Why did they want some mage? She didn’t know but she was never one to second guess her orders. To go against what she was told was a waste of time, she would have been dead by the end of the day if she did. She had once believed that they accepted her with open arms, that Phantom Lord truly cared about her well being. It was a lie. A bitter sweet lie she allowed to remain in her head.

Hundreds of opponents had come before her. She was accustomed to the way of a battle and had harnessed her skill at a young age. The pure power of the rain pushed her further. She had an unlimited amount of power around her, unlike others, they would run out of fuel. She began to crave that god-like power. Allow the storm to rage on, all she had was herself and the droplets that followed. She understood she was an outcast. Love was never an option, not for someone who brought gloom everywhere.

But this afternoon, fate was a funny thing. She walked onto that rooftop, winning was the only thing on her mind, but he was there. A man who didn’t back down, a man who saw her as an equal.

Her heart began to race. It was forgien and she wasn’t sure if she liked it. She had felt attraction before but this, this was different. Something as small as a single glance had already spun her mind into a muddled mess. It would have been better if she turned around, if he didn’t engage in the fight. Then maybe she wouldn’t be thinking of him like this.

Love at first sight. That wasn’t real. No one could possibly have that happen. What could drive someone's emotion so wild that they become attached to a person in such a short time? And yet it happened. He stood there waiting for the next move and she could only gaze at him with rose colored glasses.

An enemy. A traitor. That's what she would be if she dared to let him escape. She couldn’t hestatite, she never did and now she was frozen in her spot as ice magic danced around her. Peoples magic and abilities never intrigued her, but this, this was beyond anything she had seen.

The light reflecting off of the ice as her droplets froze before her eyes was breathtaking and she hardly noticed that she was losing the battle. She never thought rain could look, dare she say, beautiful? But in this state of its frozen glory, it was all she could think about. She envied those who never had to stay in the rain, a jealousy she didn’t want to admit had festered over the years and she gave up trying to despise the element. But before her was something much more than the state she was accustomed to. Ice. The solid purity of her own and she had wondered what it would be like to hold it in her hands.

She had water locked him, pulled out all of the stops and even with that, he stood again and again. He had screamed that the water was boiling, burning his skin but never before had the water gone above warm. It was usually ice cold on the tipping point of freezing but she could feel the warmth surrounding her.

It shocked her just the same. She had heard people talk about feeling the sun kiss their skin, the warmth spreading as they walked, this was the closest she had felt to that. This warm rush of water was beyond what she had known and yet even as it tinged her hands it felt good, it felt freeing, it felt right.

It burned in a way she had craved for so long. Something other than the fridgeness she had grown used too.

She stared at her reflection in her mirror, tears brimming her eyes. How could one person she just met bring her something she had never felt before? She shut the light out in the bathroom and walked back to her bed, passing her window, she stopped and turned.

Above in the sky was the moon. A soft white glow surrounded the orb that she had never seen before. It was breathtaking. A cosmic power the normal people of the world didn’t dare to worship now became a luxury. The sky was clear and she could see the stars, she could sense them all. How could she have lived her entire life never once seeing the moon and the sun? She had been cursed to live in the rain forever.

But he-he made it stop.

When he grabbed her arm, it was like time had stopped. As if everything she had ever known was washed away and all she could see was a bright light encasing him. She was content knowing her death was coming, there was hardly a reason for her to live. Perhaps she wasn't even living, just surviving day after gloomy day.

He pulled her to safety, her back against the roof as she panted heavily. Those clouds above her moved like a curtain for a show, parting just so that she could see the enchanting mystery she had always craved.

She had never known a blue sky till then. The brightness was almost unbearable as she stared into a sky she had never known. So many emotions flooded her head but it was clear as those ice crystals that her heart was beating for him. She was his enemy, they made that clear from the start but he hadn’t hesitated to save her. He showed a mercy she had never come across.

Another tear fell as she sat on her bed.

“He saved Juvia.” She whispered to herself. A horrific thought came to her. Would she have saved him? She didn’t want to know the outcome because deep down she believed she was good. Beneath the surface of unremosle power, there was that scared little girl who never had anyone to care for her.

The amount of days she sat in that orphanage alone sewing her dolls and praying that the rain stopped one way or another, it was as if she couldn’t remember it. He had done the impossible. He showed her the sky she hadn’t seen. He had shown her kindness.

A thought came to mind as she stood and packed her things. No more would she be known as “the rain woman”. No more would gloom be her only trait. She was determined to find something much more appealing than those bowing by fear. She wanted love. She wanted that warmth of the water constantly and the feeling of the sun on her skin. She understood it now. There was a power strong than her, stronger than any wizard that surrounded the other guild.

She had vowed to be done with love. Promised herself that no man could hurt her again. She was trembling at the thought of being vulnerable once more. The only time she felt warmth was the scorching burn of a fiery rejection and words that burned like lava. It was too much for someone to handle. So she pushed it down, locked the key and threw it as far as she could. The temptation though. The idea of letting her guard down for someone, someone she barely knew? How she fantasized of that moment. She had once believed that someone of her past had done that, but they were all the same. Ashamed of the rain, the rain she caused, the pain she brought.

And after their fight when she collected herself and tried to run back towards her guild, he stopped her.

“For what it's worth I think you’re an incredible wizard. You may not want to believe that your guild is dark and bad but, Fairy Tail is always open.” He had said it with such sincerity that she wasn’t sure if it were true.

“Juvia thinks your magic is just as powerful.” She had said before he gave her a smile and turned away to go back to his other guild mates.

And here she stood, a suitcases packed in the night and a note left on the desk. This guild didn’t deserve any words. Not when they feasted on her ability. Harvested those negative emotions and almost made her fall into the deep end.

She knew what they would say. They would call her a coward. A traitor and a worthless wizard, at first it was enough to stop her. Make her stay and perhaps bring back the clouds. However what he said stuck in her mind.

“I would rather die fighting than let your guild have Lucy! She is one of us and we don’t leave anyone behind.”

Without hesitation he made it clear that every member of the guild was valued no matter how long they had been there, they were a family. If something like that would have happened, if she were threatened, her guild would let her die without a second thought.

Never again would she allow someone to have a hold over her. She spent too many years sheltered by pain and deviation to go on like that.

She grabbed her bag and closed her door.

Juvia stood in front of the door. The morning would be better to do this but it was beyond dark outside and she didn’t want her intrusive thoughts pulling her back to her old guild. Softly she knocked, maybe hoping that he wouldn’t hear it and force her back to the isolation of fear.

The open clicked open and her eyes widened slightly as a sleepy Gray leaned against the door frame, shirtless and rubbing his eyes.

“Juvia?” He blinked and watched as her cheek puffed out in red. He looked down to see that he was only in his underwear and let out a yelp as he grabbed a blanket off the chair. “What are you doing here?”

“Um Juvia thought.” She paused and looked towards the ground. “Actually Juvia apologies for disturbing you.” Her back was to him and she began to walk away.

“Wait!” His hand caught hers and he pulled slightly. A jolt of warmth spread through her, burning her like a thousand suns as well as the chill of ice from his own temperature. She looked back at him, eyes wide and lips parted. “Juvia, please just tell me.”

“Such kindness.” She whispered to herself. Her heart rate sped up just like it did earlier and she swallowed a breath. “Juvia was wondering…why did you save her?”

His hand dropped her as if he were shocked that she would dare question his action.

“I wasn’t going to let you die. Enemies or not, I don’t think you deserved that fate. I don’t believe that you are this evil person your guild made you out to be. To be honest when you fell, you look like you didn’t care what happened and I guess I saw myself in you.”

“You saved Juvia because you know what it's like?”

“To feel lost and hopeless I guess.” He scratched the back of his neck nervously. “Sometimes it's hard thinking you deserve to live, that it would be better to harbor all the pain of your past. I don’t know everything about you but that look in your eyes. I couldn’t let you go knowing that there was a brighter future ahead.”

A tear dripped from her eye. Her smile was soft as hugged her arms to her body. “You knew Juvia would join the guild.”

“Well I wouldn’t say I knew, but I was hoping that you would. If you still want to, that is.”

“Juvia would be honored.” She bowed respectfully towards him.

Gray smiled and bowed back. His eyes faced the sky looking towards the moon. “Have you ever seen it?”

“Tonight would be the first. Juvia thinks the stars are remarkable.”

“Lucy knows alot about them, I think you two would be good friends.”

Juvia shook her head as regret twisted in her stomach. “Juvia accepts your kindness and compassion but she doesn’t know if the rest will. Juvia was her rival, she understands if everyone doesn’t see her as a friend.” She frowned slightly.

A laugh came from the ice mage's mouth. “That's the thing about Fairy Tail, no matter where you come from or what your past may have held, there's always going to be a friend waiting.”

Juvia nodded. “Thank you Gray. Juvia will talk to your guild master tomorrow.”

“Like I said before. You’re an incredible wizard, you’ll be just fine.” He winked.

“Have a nice night.”

“You too.”

She watched as he entered his house before turning around and walking towards her hotel. Her shoulders felt lighter and she held her head high for the first time. This was her step in the right direction, this was where her new life began.

Time had slowed and allowed her to pause. A beautiful revelation she never knew could exist came to mind as she just realized that she was in love.

---

She looked down at her leg in the mirror. The voices behind her had faded to the background as she became entranced with the mark of Fairy Tail.

“The blue suits you.” She turned to see Gray standing there with a smile as he was focused on her guild mark.

To say that she was grateful was an understatement. Her mask she wore like a crown had shattered. It unravels in his hands as the months went on and all that was left was the person she wanted to be. She could finally let go of her ghosts, her darkness and begin to forgive herself.

---

“What do you think?” He asked her as the white sky fell with snow.

Gray had told her of a special spot he used to go to when the first snow came. Past the forest was a clearing of grassy hills that would soon become a winter wonderland. Laid out on one of the hills was a blanket and a few lanterns.

She held her hand out and felt the tiny snowflakes collect on her hand. He sat behind her, one arm snaked around her waist while the other hand rose above hers and created a small flurry of snowflakes.

“Breathtaking.” She gushed. This was the first time she had seen snow fall. Her eyes followed the ice magic as it formed a heart and blew into the sky joining the other flurries. She turned so she could meet his eyes and his normal content face was replaced with a smile.

He leaned forward until their noses touched briefly. “Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?” He said and she only had a moment to process his words as his lips landed on hers and her eyes fluttered close.

Her hand went to his cheek as she leaned towards him, her energy matching his and all she could hear was the thumping of her heart. She would be embarrassed to say that she might have dreamt of this moment a little too much but it didn’t matter now. All she knew was that her beloved felt the same.

---

For once she was happy to hear a cry. That little whimper bubbling from the baby's mouth, her baby, she was in disbelief. Perfection was a rarity. No one was perfect, but the being with a tuft of dark blue hair and grey eyes would beg to differ. A child was never in her future. The thought came up randomly but the idea of raising a family wasn’t even a question.

During her missions in her old guild, she would walk past a family. She would see happy faces on everyone and would only be filled with envy and hatred. Disgusting was what it was. How could you love someone else when there was no love for you?

But times change. She would see others holding their child's hand and feel a warmth in her heart at how the children beamed up at their parents. She could sense the love all around them and would smile herself, hoping that it might become a reality for herself.

She would wake in the middle of the night, not from her demons but for her new reason to live. He would babble and tug at the locks of her hair and giggle when water magic danced before his young eyes.

---

It was nights like these that loved the most. The soft rays of moonlight casting shadows through her window as silk sheets wrapped around her bare form. She used to spend nights alone, only her pillow to catch her tears and now delicate fingers trail her backside as she listens to the thumping of his heart. His chest rises and falls as her own follows the rhythm. Her eyes flutter close as her tiredness grows untils it's interrupted by a cool press of lips under her ear.

A peaceful sigh leaves her lips as she tilts her head up to meet dark eyes gazing at her. Flushed cheeks was something she wore often and she lifted off of him to move further up and meet his lips with hers. He pulls her back to him, hating the emptiness between them and adores the way she shivers when his thumb traces her guild mark.

Their love was honest and raw. She had learned that nights like those in the past would haunt him as well. They would keep him up and plague his thoughts with images of death and destruction. But now, they lingered in the shadows, always there but something brighter and beautiful guarded them to peace and she focused on the way he breathed her name then the tears that dropped.

There was an overwhelming amount of happiness that she had gathered after all the years she spent in Fairy Tail. She found friendship and family bonds. Love in all forms that she cherished deeply. Her powers were seen as a gift to help others and lend a hand, not twisted into medled lies that she had spent so long untangling.

Her lips pulled from his slowly and their breaths settled between them. When she looked at Gray she found something more. She had freedom and rebirth. Forgiveness and lust wrapped into something more than love. Their bond was stronger than she could have ever dreamed and when he left kisses over her skin she wanted nothing more in life than to stay frozen in this moment.

He did the impossible. He opened a door, shined a light through her darkness and allowed her to accept the fact that she did deserve to live. She could cherish moments and keep them as her own without the threat of corruption. Her life was now her own to command and she did it with such grace and beauty that Gray couldn’t imagine her being any different.

“I love you.” He promised and there was no doubt in her mind that he meant it.

“I love you too.” She responded.

The beautiful truth was that she was finally at peace and loved herself.

---

I hope that you all enjoyed and thank you for being so lovely <3

#Gruvia #Gruvia fic #gray x Juvia #Juvia x Gray #Juvia ft #gray fullbuster #juvia loxar #fairy tail #fairy tail fic #thewritingstar

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inevitably-johnlocked · 4 years

Text

Taking a Break.

(Aug 24 to Sept 14/20)

So.

You may have guessed this was coming with my hinted responses to recent posts. I talked with a few Lovelies behind the scenes to help ease my fears about this decision. I’ve done a lot of reflective thinking for the past few weeks, and I’ve decided that when I have a three week break from work, I am also going to take advantage of that and take a three week break from here as well.

This is not something any of y’all did. Please do not think this. This is a “Steph hasn’t had time for herself since last summer” thing, a “Steph puts too much on her own shoulders because she doesn’t feel she deserves her own time” thing, a “Steph just needs a break” thing. And it’s been made even worse with C-19 because I’m NEVER off of the same computer nor couch. Before, I’d go to and from work, and blogging in the evenings was fun, because I didn’t do it during the day. Then on weekends, I’d answer asks and leave for the gym, spend a bit of my day running around, and come home, play again on Tumblr, and repeat.

Now, on work days, I literally wake up, spend 16 hours on my laptop, and then go to bed. Weekends, I FEEL obligated to be on Tumblr to help curate the community I love treasure so dearly, so ANOTHER day or so of my weekend is dedicated to making sure I have content for the following week to come, because HEY I can’t leave home anyway, MAY AS WELL.

My blog is nearly a full time job, one I volunteer my free time for (I have a Ko.fi, shameless segue). I spend about 30 hours a week answering asks, filing my posts, searching for stuff for people, collecting reblog threads and chains, and generally trying to keep a positive attitude because I know so many of y’all come here for safety, love, happiness, and escapism. And I do it ALL because I LOVE doing it. I love being a curator of fandom. I love having a blog that people know they can come and generally have a good time. I love all of my friends and lurkers and the people who help me make this blog an interactive one.

The problem is that with never leaving home, I am becoming emotionally drained, very depressed, and am slowly not enjoying doing this anymore. I DON’T WANT THAT TO HAPPEN. So after a lot of discussions with a few people and self reflection, I’ve decided I need Steph-Time™, and I need to FEEL like I’m not obligated to be here all the time, just like I needed time away from work. As I explained to my boss, I just need that time to not feel obligated to answer calls and Slack messages without feeling guilty about it. It’s different when I have a Work Computer and a Home Computer. My home computer is supposed to be Fun Stuff. Now it’s not, because work bothers me on my fun computer. He agreed, as did the Lovelies who I talked to behind the scenes.

I love you guys SO MUCH, and I love receiving the asks I get, but some days, a dozen asks daily becomes overwhelming and new fic lists and song recs become intimidating. I need a break. It’s taken me a lot to say that, because I am crying writing this because I feel so many people need me, and I genuinely don’t feel like I deserve a break ever, because there are people who come to me for comfort and need it more than I need a break.

But the ironic thing is that I can’t help anyone if I’m not taking care of myself. How fitting that my own advice to others comes back to slap me in the face, eh?

So, here’s what’s happening then, because I KNOW I can’t 100% stay away from here...

I am taking 3 weeks off from work starting August 24 until September 14. My “obligation break” from Tumblr will be during that time as well. I say “obligation” because Tumblr feels like I HAVE to do it. I don’t want that. I want to see what it’s like being you guys again, just taking in content, and coming on occasionally, post up shit photos of myself, LOL.

During said break, ALL ASKS AND SUBMISSIONS WILL BE TURNED OFF. I want to, IF I FEEL LIKE IT, take the time to answer some old asks. Essentially, I just want to do my blog because I feel like it, not because I NEED NEW CONTENT. Yeah, I think that’s what stresses me out, is because I’m TERRIFIED that y’all will leave me if I don’t keep producing new stuff, so I just.... never stop, and it’s draining me.

As an exception to the off-inbox rule, ASKS WILL BE TURNED ON ON AUGUST 27 ONLY. That is my birthday, and I know some people will want to send me well wishes. If you send me an un-related ask on that day, I probably won’t answer it unless it’s one of those ones I can answer quickly. But yeah, my birthday is on the 27, if anyone is interested in that sort of thing.

WEDNESDAY FIC LISTS WILL NOT BE PUBLISHED DURING THESE THREE WEEKS. Namely because I have exactly 4 lists ready to go, and I plan on using them for the this and the three subsequent Sundays.

Five Fics Friday is still on, as is Fic Rec Sunday. 5FF will probably be fave fics instead of new MFLs, so I’m sorry about that. The Sunday lists are already done and therefore not going to stress me out.

I’m not leaving completely. I’m still here, I just, like I said, need that obligation element removed from my brain. You guys have NO CLUE how guilty I feel every day when I have to choose one or another ask because of the quickness of one ask over another, or the fact that This Day was a Bad Day™ and I can’t answer advice asks in a bad headspace. I need that element removed to just the asks I’ve already got, and let myself answer them on my own time. Draft a slew of them to post when I return (I mean, y’all have been waiting months/years on some of my asks, what’s another three weeks, LOL), and head back with a clear head to better help you guys.

So LITERALLY, the only difference you guys will notice is the lack of NEW posts. My queue is full for the next MONTH, so literally you would not even know I was gone unless you tried to send me an ask or a DM.

Let’s be real here, guys, I’m not going to completely disconnect for 3 weeks. Y’all will be yelling at me to get off and go outside, LOL.

So what am I doing with my 3 weeks then? Updating my resumé, learn some new art skills, go for my Big Walks™ I haven’t been doing, play some video games, get my hair cut, maybe get my cat. Do and post up some of my art I’ve been meaning to finish. You know, stuff that not-losers do, LOL.

Anyway, unlike Mofftiss, please don’t give up on me after three (weeks) :D I just need a mental health check, is really all this is. I’m having a hard time disconnecting work from leisure and I need to do that again. <3

I will be back, I promise!! And hopefully better. <3

This is a very difficult decision for me, because I’ve been running this blog at full steam for about FIVE YEARS NON-STOP. All because I’m scared of hurting people. I hope you all understand.

I love you guys so much. <3

~Steph

#my blog #about me #steph takes a vacay #i'm just really drained you guys #i hope you understand #steph says 'obligated' a lot #long post

240 notes · View notes

munchcorner · 3 years

Text

Pastries (SakuAtsu)

Atsumu's a lonely baker who spends most of his time baking. It was his way of coping for when his parents had passed from old age and his brother, Osamu, had gotten married and started a family. He used to be surrounded by so many people he loved, but as time passes and they grew older, their time for each other became limited, leaving Atsumu feeling a little lonely. So, he builds his own bakery to keep him busy and fill his loneliness by interacting with his customers.

Atsumu had fun talking to various people. He's met students who buy his sweets as their reward for themselves for their hard work at school. He's met children who loved his cookies because they looked adorable. He's met lonely adults like him who think that life is boring and is a constant misery. He's met people who were enjoying life. He's met people who are in love and are content with their lives. But the most memorable one was the man with black curly hair and dark emerald eyes.

He was a man who looked like he who saw the world in monochrome. One where he just goes with the flow of life. Even his voice was monotonous when Atsumu strikes a conversation.

"You don't seem like someone who would enjoy cookies shaped like characters," Atsumu comments as he puts the cookies in a box.

"Well, they're not for me. They're for my daughter," The man answers, making Atsumu go, "oh,"

"Yeah, so how much?" The man asks as he pulls his wallet out of his pocket.

"That'll be 4867.52 yen," Atsumu answers and hands the man the box of cookies.

The man pays for it, and just as he turns around to leave, his phone starts to ring, and the man's face immediately lights up at the sight of the name flashing on the screen.

Atsumu wanted to ask if it was his daughter, but he didn't want to be intrusive, so he presses his lips together and remains quiet.

The man answers the call, and Atsumu could hear his daughter's voice, excitedly screaming, "did you buy them?! Did you buy it?! Please tell me you bought them! Please! Please! Please!"

The man chuckles as he pulls on the door, "Yeah, I have it, don't worry,"

Atsumu watched as the man walk away. He places his hands on the counter and softly smiles all to himself, "I wonder what it's like to have someone who looks forward to seeing you come home?"

The loneliness Atsumu had been feeling comes back after that little encounter, but it became stronger when he got home. He immediately dialed Osamu's number, hoping that maybe he's free, but he ends up sighing when he was directly sent to voicemail.

Atsumu doesn't leave a message and just ends the call before going to bed.

The next day comes, and the curly-haired man he met yesterday comes to buy a different set of pastries from him.

"So, did your daughter like it?" Atsumu asks as he packages the cupcakes the man just bought.

"She loved it," The man answers shortly, but unlike before, now he has this small little smile on his lips as he answers.

Atsumu hums in delight and gives the man the cookies, "I'm glad to hear that,"

A month passes with the man buying different types of pastries from him. They'd have small conversations from time to time, and as the days turn to months, they slowly started talking about more personal stuff.

Atsumu finally learned what the man's name was after three months of constantly talking to each other. His name's Sakusa Kiyoomi, a dashing name just like the person itself, but aside from Kiyoomi, he also learned his daughter's name, Sakusa Sayomi.

"Sayomi said she wanted to meet you," Kiyoomi says as he watches Atsumu put the cake in a velvet box.

"Oh, is that so?" Atsumu asks and puts a ribbon on the box.

"Yeah, if that's alright with you," Kiyoomi says as he takes the box and takes out his wallet to pay for the cake, "it's fine if you're not okay with it,"

"Are you kidding me? I'd love to meet her! I'm actually amazed that it took you three months to bring her here because you talk about her a lot," Atsumu says with a chuckle.

Kiyoomi puffs his cheeks and looks at his feet in embarrassment.

Adorable. Atsumu thinks.

"Do I really talk that much?" Kiyoomi asks, his cheeks flushed red and his fingers pulling on his slacks.

"Yeah," Atsumu answers, "so, when can I meet her?"

"What about tomorrow? Is that a good time?" Kiyoomi asks.

"Yeah, I'm cool with that,"

And with that, they finally bid their goodbyes.

The next day arrives, and Kiyoomi enters the bakery with an eight-year-old child holding his hand. She had this huge smile on her face as she enters, and her eyes immediately brightened up when she saw the pastries.

"Daddy! Look at the Kirara-designed cake!" Sayomi beams and pulls Kiyoomi to the cakes.

Atsumu chuckles as he watches Sayomi pull Kiyoomi around. She was like a bouncing ray of sunshine, and Atsumu couldn't help but wonder what it'll be like if he had a daughter.

Kiyoomi and Sayomi roamed the bakery jumping from one pastry to another until Kiyoomi finally pulls Sayomi to Atsumu, "Sayomi, this is Atsumu, the man who makes all the pastries you eat every day,"

Sayomi's eyes shine, and she lets go of Kiyoomi to run to Atsumu and hold his hands, "this hands,"

"What about them?" Atsumu asks and crouches down to be on the same level as her.

"I'm thankful for them because they make me my favorite treats," She answers and smiles at Atsumu.

"What about me? You're not thankful for me?" Atsumu asks and points at himself with a pout.

Sayomi chuckles and pulls Atsumu into a hug which surprises him, "of course, I'm most thankful for you because you make my treats and make daddy happy,"

Atsumu didn't expect what he heard, and so did Kiyoomi because when Atsumu raises his head to look at Kiyoomi, his eyes were wide, and his cheeks were flushed.

"How do I make your daddy happy?" Atsumu asks without breaking eye contact with Kiyoomi.

"By talking to him, silly. You see, daddy had been very sad lately, but ever since he started buying treats from you, he comes home happier," Sayomi says and pulls away, "that's why I wanted to meet you, Atsumu-san,"

Atsumu doesn't know how to respond properly, so he ruffles her hair and says, "I'm glad I can make your daddy happy,"

The rest of the day proceeds, with Atsumu, Kiyoomi, and Sayomi sharing a meal they prepared in the kitchen. It was already late when they finished talking, and Atsumu didn't want them to leave eating nothing but pastries, so he offers to cook them. But he didn't expect them to help.

The kitchen was too small for all three of them, but it was fun nonetheless. Atsumu found out that Kiyoomi cooks for them, but his knowledge in cookies was limited to a few kinds of pasta, ramen, and a few dishes. So, Atsumu decided to cook something Kiyoomi didn't know how to prepare so he and Sayomi could learn.

That night Sayomi and Kiyoomi leave with some leftovers from their dinner.

"Thanks for the meal, Atsumu," Kiyoomi says shyly while Sayomi waits in the car.

"it's nothing. I had fun," Atsumu says.

The atmosphere around them turned a bit awkward after what Sayomi said about Atsumu making Kiyoomi happy. But the awkward silence didn't last when Kiyoomi said, "Why don't we go out next time? All three of us,"

"Are you asking me out on a date?" Atsumu asks, and Kiyoomi nods, "my invitation sucks, but I'm hoping you'd say yes,"

Atsumu laughs and takes a step towards Kiyoomi, "I'd love that," he whispers and kisses Kiyoomi's cheek.

Atsumu steps away and sees Kiyoomi staring at the ground with his cheeks flushed, "oh, Omi-kun, that was just a kiss on the cheek,"

"Shut up!" Kiyoomi says and turns away, "anyway, I'll come by tomorrow to pick you up,"

"Sounds good to me. See you tomorrow, Omi-kun," Atsumu says with a smile.

"See you tomorrow, Atsumu,"

The next day arrives, and Kiyoomi does pick Atsumu up with Sayomi. The date was fun, and it made Atsumu feel like they were a family. That one date alone was enough to make Atsumu feel happy and less lonely. But that loneliness stopped coming when Kiyoomi constantly asked him out on dates.

Every month, Kiyoomi would ask Atsumu out on a date. Sometimes, they'd bring Sayomi with them. Sometimes, it'll just be them. The dates were fun, and it made Atsumu feel happy and full. Kiyoomi and Sayomi shooed away the loneliness Atsumu had been feeling ever since his adulthood.

But sometimes, Atsumu would wonder how long it'll last.

The day came when Kiyoomi stopped visiting the bakery. Atsumu thought maybe Kiyoomi was just busy. But the text messages became lesser with each passing day until all Atsumu receives are good mornings and goodnights. It scared Atsumu that maybe Kiyoomi was over it. That Atsumu didn't make Kiyoomi happy anymore.

But after three weeks of Kiyoomi being cold, he asks Atsumu to meet him at their favorite restaurant. This made Atsumu think, "ah, he's finally breaking up with me," and despite the pain in his chest, Atsumu goes to visit him.

Atsumu arrives, thinking this would be the last time he'd ever meet Kiyoomi and Sayomi again. So, he was surprised when the lights opened, and all he saw were Kiyoomi and Sayomi standing in the middle.

"Kiyoomi, what's happening?" Atsumu asks, but Kiyoomi didn't answer. Instead, their families came out, each holding a letter to form the sentence, "will you marry me, Atsumu?"

Atsumu was stunned, and he didn't know what to do. He ended up staring at the words in front of him until Kiyoomi walks up to him and takes his hand before kneeling down.

"Everything might seem too fast to you. We've only been dating for a year, and yet here I am on my knees, asking you to marry me," Kiyoomi starts and kisses Atsumu's hand with quivering lips, "but you make me and Sayomi so happy that I think this is the only way for all three of us to be happy together for the rest of our lives,"

Atsumu's tears start to fall as he waits for Kiyoomi to continue.

"It's so bold of me to assume that we give you the same happiness you give us, but you just seem to smile brighter when you're with us. So, I'm taking this risk and asking you to marry me, Atsumu," Kiyoomi ends and raises his head to look at Atsumu.

"You idiot, who acts so cold to their significant other when they're about to propose, huh?" Atsumu asks and jokingly kicks Kiyoomi's knee, "you suck at this. You should've been sweeter, not cold,"

Kiyoomi chuckles, "I'm sorry,"

"I would've said yes if you weren't so cold, you know," Atsumu says, making Kiyoomi panic.

"So, are you saying no?" Kiyoomi asks and gulps.

"I'm thinking about it," Atsumu jokes.

But Sayomi seemed to have taken it seriously because she runs to Atsumu, clings on his pants, and says, "please, don't say no, Atsumu. I really want you to be my papa,"

Sayomi had tears in her eyes as she said it and made Atsumu's heart clench.

"I was just joking, Sayomi. I'd love to be part of your family. It's just that you're dad is terrible at this," Atsumu says after kneeling down and hugging Sayomi.

Atsumu can hear the sigh of relief Kiyoomi had put out and laughs before turning to Kiyoomi, "you're lucky Sayomi's here to make up for your coldness,"

Kiyoomi rolls his eyes at Atsumu's words, "right like you didn't want to marry me in the first place,"

"Why are you suddenly so cocky?" Atsumu asks in disbelief, "it's because you already said yes,"

Kiyoomi smirks at him and takes his right hand to put the ring on his finger and placing a kiss on it, "thank you for saying yes, Atsumu,"

Atsumu smiles, "No, I'm glad you asked me to marry,"

And ever since then, Atsumu didn't have to wonder what it'll be like to have someone waiting for you at home because now he comes home to his husband and their daughter.

--*--

I also have this posted on Twitter.

#sakuatsu #atsumu x sakusa #haikyuu sakusa #sakusa kiyoomi #sakusa x atsumu #haikyuu atsumu #miya atsumu #haikyuu #haikyū!!#hq #hq atsumu #haikyuu atsumu x sakusa

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effymaybe · 3 years

Note

hello, author! deathbyjenlisa on wattpad has this prompt: future post-disbandment au where they live in a tiny little apartment in the middle of nowhere in Paris together with their cats and dogs, and they own like a flower shop or something. and finally, FINALLY doing a vlive together where they announce their relationship to the world. (may we have this piece from u? u r one of the best rpf writers i know. thank u in advance!)

deathbyjenlisa on wattpad I love you and I’m SO SORRY IT TOOK ME SO LONG I KNOW SUCK also here it goes!

Warnings: Fluffy fluffity fluff

Jennie closes her eyes as the faint afternoon sun caresses her glowing skin throughout the window.

She breathes slowly, content. Inside the just-conveniently-sized apartment, the atmosphere is still nice and warm despite the first bites of winter cooling down the air of the city.

The brunette is enjoying of a pleasant break after a few hours of frankly successful designing, and her previous artistic buzz has left place to a nice, tickly feeling still twitching in the pad of her fingers.

She sighs just as a fluffy warmth gazes against her legs earnestly.

“Hello, Lily. Miss mommy already?”

The cat looks up at her almost as if in agreement. Jennie leans down to pet her behind her ears, just as she likes it the most.

“I miss her, too. Maybe Jisoo is right. We might be a little bit needy”.

Lily keeps purring under Jennie’s soft hand, clearly happy with the attention she is given. The brunette smiles to herself. She figures that the kitten would actually hesitate if she had to choose between her two moms.

Thankfully, she doesn’t have to.

“Okay, baby. Let’s get you an afternoon treat, yeah? Don’t tell the others”.

Lily’s silent vow of trust is pointless, really. As soon as Jennie shakes the so-secret pack of treats hidden at the very bottom of the kitchen counter, the whole feline family plus an equally excited Kuma enter the room with bright eyes and a grumbling stomach.

The brunette is unfazed. She’s been dealing with this routine for almost three years already, and despite she likes to complain to her girlfriend about her unmeasured need for adopting cats, she wouldn’t change the daily, often overcrowded cuddles for anything in the word.

“There”, she mumbles, filling her pets’ plates with practiced patience, “so that you know that I can be the cool mom, too”.

She stands straight again, glancing at the different furs engaging in their eating. A giddy feeling starts to bloom in her heart suddenly, a sense of happiness mixed with a now unfamiliar pang of uncertainty that weakens her limbs.

They are definitely taking a gigantic step today.

A very much needed, absolutely wanted step.

She runs her fingers through her rich chocolate hair, glancing around with a critical, designer eye as she moves to the living room. It’s small, really, like the rest of the place, but so fantastically decorated –according to a proud Lisa staring at a flattered but shy Jennie- that it often features a big bunch of house décor Instagram accounts.

The brunette puts her hands on her hips.

It’s beautiful. She loves her house. She loves the size, the shape, the colors, the fact that she can have a modest yet quite impressive sight of the Eiffel tower only by opening the French door to the balcony. She loves the city, the accent, the passion. She loves the people, who have taken her and her family wholeheartedly, without questions. She loves her sons and her daughter and she loves, loves, loves her girlfriend with every beat buzzing in her chest.

What she does not love so much right now are those yellowish pillows, that-

“Hello, love”.

An instant smile plasters itself in Jennie’s expression. Steady arms circle her waist tenderly, and plump lips kiss the column of her neck in a tender motion.

“Mmm, hi”.

God, she really behaves like a teenager whenever her girlfriend is around.

“Brought you flowers, baby”, she hears against her ear, and just then she glances down to catch the sight of daisies and red tulips contrasting against each other in a big, gorgeous bouquet.

“Thank you”, she mumbles back, taking the gift with pointed care, “but you are going to empty our shop if you keep taking flowers”.

Lisa chuckles lowly, pure affection dancing in her eyes.

“You know I always order extra just for you”.

The tallest girl lets her girlfriend spin around in her arms. Her expression softens even further at the sight of sharp, stunning features. Lisa’s right hand naturally drifts up to grasp Jennie’s nape in an unconscious attempt to keep her close.

It’s not that Jennie would like to leave, anyway. The shortest girl leans up, gleeful, and her girlfriend meets her in the middle to wrap her up in a soft, welcoming kiss. They spend a few delightful seconds just like that, enjoying each other. It’s unlikely, Jennie thinks sometimes, to adore someone with such strength month after month, year after year. And their love has changed, actually.

It has gotten better. Stronger.

So it’s time to take the next big step.

“I’m ready”, Jennie murmurs against Lisa’s lips, and feels a smile shaping against her own mouth.

“Okay”. The tallest brunette takes a step back to take in her girlfriend’s figure, feeling a soft warmth spreading in her chest. “You look amazing. I love the shirt. It’s a pity they’ll only get to see a half of you”.

Jennie chuckles a breathless thank you, pulling fully away from her lover to look for a standee where to place her phone. In the meantime, Lisa takes her time to greet the rest of her wide family, already full and half-asleep on their respective beds. When she comes back to the living room, her girlfriend is already sitting cross-legged on the wide, greyish couch, figuring out the best angle to gather the afternoon light. On top of the coffee table lies the bouquet she got from the small flower shop they decided to put up mainly as a hobby after their successful careers as Blackpink members.

Lisa can’t help the grin that stretches across her face.

She’s just so, so happy.

“Baby”, she murmurs, moving slowly to sit beside the brunette.

Jennie looks at her and tilts her head in a sign of attention.

“I love you so much”.

Lisa’s unprompted sincerity is rewarded with a gummy smile and a soft peck.

“I love you, too, beautiful”.

A message travels across their joined gazes. A renewed vow of loyalty, love, and support. It’s their way to letting each other know that they are ready, no stepping back. The time and their own effort have prompted the building of a bond that lasts beyond obstacles, beyond fear.

When Jennie presses the screen to start the live, they are both leaning comfortably against each other.

“Hi”, the shortest brunette mumbles after a few seconds. Against her skin, the soft vibration of Lisa’s muffled laughter makes her blush in a rush of shy joy. “This is Jennie”.

The tallest girl grins at her girlfriend’s soft tone. “And Lisa”, she adds cheerfully. “We are here… to talk…”

Jennie’s right hand moves unconsciously to caress her lover’s arm up and down, just as she does each time a bitter hint of anxiety threatens to deprive her from fresh air. In exchange, as a caring reflex, Lisa embraces her narrow shoulders with her arm, keeping the brunette’s body flushed against her own.

“…to talk about us… We’ve seen some theories on the internet since… well, even before Blackpink stopped making… official music”, Jennie adds, eyeing the rising number of viewers at the corner of the screen.

It’s amazing. It’s been years already, and their fans are as many and as supportive as they were before.

“By the way, we might have a surprise coming soon!”, Lisa intervenes, and watches with silent amusement as her girlfriend crunches her nose just slightly besides her.

“Lili, no spoilers!”, Jennie complains only half-heartedly, melting inwards as the tallest brunette pouts just slightly.

“Mmh, sorry, babe”, she hears against her ear then, and all her fake annoyance disappears as soon as it started.

She turns around, keeping up with her admonishing from just to see her girlfriend pouting deeper, and her wish is immediately granted. They look at each other for a moment, their expressions turning into soft, dizzy smiles dripping pure adoration, and it takes both of them a moment to realize that there are about a million people watching them interact at the moment.

“So, huh, us!”, Jennie states, turning towards the camera once again. “Us… so… where do we even start”, she giggles, somehow lost. There is so much to tell. So many tears, so many victories.

“Well… to answer the basics… yes, we are girlfriends”, Lisa speaks then, loud and clear, smiling brightly, almost as if illuminated by her own love.

Jennie feels a burst of pride striking against her heart. She knows that her lover is being so, so brave.

“Girlfriends”, the shortest brunette affirms, and her sharp stare meets Lisa’s open doe eyes. “As in dating, hand-holding, kissing girlfriends, not the best-friends-forever type”.

The tallest girl chuckles brightly, both because rambling Jennie is funny and adorable and also because the tension of the moment makes her chest feel tickly.

Well, it’s there now.

The world knows that Jennie is her girlfriend.

The sudden, pleasing thought of their truth being outwardly spoken makes her feel lighter, elevated as she stares at Jennie with an expression that even herself knows that screams whipped.

It doesn’t matter, really, because her lover’s eyes distillates a feeling of the same fashion.

They tear their gazes apart from each other only when the enrapturing sensation starts to die down in a soft giddiness. They glance at the appearing messages almost with fear, but sunned smiles bright up their features when they read –mostly- comments both congratulating them and asking a billion questions about their relationship.

“’Oh my god this is so shocking… who would say that two rich, adult women choosing to live together raising each other’s’ pets would be dating!’. Well, thanks for the sarcasm, Lisa’shoe… also, careful with that username”, Jennie murmurs. She rolls her eyes in feign annoyance, but her dopey grin stays in place. At her side, still embracing her shoulders in a protective side-hug, Lisa chuckles again, so visibly content, shining, that the shortest girl has to make an effort not to stare at her throughout the mirrored screen.

“Oh, ‘when did you start dating?’ I don’t think we can say exactly when, but...” Jennie begins, her eyes falling on her girlfriend as if searching for help.

“Some years after all the… shipping started, actually. It took us some time…”

“It took you some time if I remember correctly...”, Jennie plays, her sharp expression both softening and growing more electric.

Lisa smiles, all teeth and happiness, and gives in the need of squeezing her girlfriend against her just a little bit tighter.

“But I’ve always liked you! You know it!”, she complains, a slight whine tangling in her voice.

“Of course! I’m amazing!”, Jennie bites back, brushing her long hair past her shoulders in a mocking gesture.

“You are”, Lisa murmurs, staring deep into chocolate without a care in the world, and the sincerity in her words makes Jennie’s pulse speed up crazily.

She leans in for a soft, quick peck, unable to stop herself, and is greeted by such an elated expression when she pulls away that she has to kiss her girlfriend once more, just to steady her soaring heart.

She’s so, so ridiculously in love.

“Charmer”, she mumbles, blushing deeply, and turns around to read another thousands of totally-freaking-out-because-of-their-cuteness messages. “Thank you guys. Really. This truly means a lot for us... The girls know, of course”, she chuckles, “They knew before us, probably. Yes, we are working on something. Nope, no spoilers!”, she winks.

Lisa reads the comments as well, absent-mindedly tangling her long fingers in her girlfriend’s soft chocolate locks, perfectly warm in the familiarity of their home.

“Yes, we are still in Paris. We love it here. The flower business is going well”, she grins, “Yes, I am the best girlfriend ever, right, babe?”

Jennie raises a single eyebrow, but gives in anyways.

“Maybe. You are the only one I’ve ever had”, she teases, gifting her girlfriend a slight shrug.

“And the only you will have!”, Lisa answers back, a playful growl playing with her deep voice in a way that makes Jennie’s stomach tingle in a quite particular way.

“Likewise, Manoban. Ah, yes, our parents know. Lisa’s parents were supportive since day one. My mom… well, it took her some time. Now she calls her whenever she needs anything. Can you believe it?”

They continue the late afternoon like that, leaning against the comfort of each other, answering some of the million questions people over the world have about their relationship.

They knew it will be like that. The sheer support, however, left them truly stunned. They were told so many times that what they were doing was wrong, immoral, dangerous, that the almost absolute acceptance of the people that surrounds them hit them like a soft, fluffy pillow in a dizzy night.

When Jennie finally turns off the live –promising to make another one soon, and yes, to give away more details, and maybe to talk about the possibility of a wedding-, the hint of the pale moonlight is already creeping past their open windows.

Jennie and Lisa stare at each other with twinning grins playing in their lips.

“So, we just did that”, the brunette mumbles.

The apartment is almost silent. Their pets are still sleeping. Only the faint sound of the never-asleep city tangles with the mute electricity of the aftermath of their bravery.

Lisa’s bright eyes darken suddenly, urged by a rush of passionate love.

“We did that. And it went really, really well”.

Jennie smiles openly, her gums nicely on display. The tallest girl feels her heart growing three sizes against her chest. Her hands lock on her girlfriend’s waist, tugging, begging her to find a way to be even closer to her body, downing in affection.

The shortest girl does not disappoint. She moves to sit down on her lap.

“Baby, we did it”, she murmurs again, in a happy awe.

Lisa starts to giggle, and the soft sounds are mirrored by her lover.

“You were incredible”, she mumbles, then, locking her stare with her girlfriend’s once again. A strong feeling, an unspoken declaration moves through them, sparkling. With the corner of her eyes, unfocused as she favors the marvelous sight of her girlfriend’s face, Lisa can see the lights of their phones going off –probably some messages from their friends and family- but the girls stay put in their delightful bubble, nevertheless.

“So did you, love. Can you believe it?”, Jennie begins, letting her feelings pour out, both soft and heavy in her words, “Now they know that you are mine and I’m yours.”

Lisa swoons.

That’s something they’ve talked about. The need to be with each other freely, to shout out their hidden love at the top of their lungs, proud, shattering.

Lisa leans up for a deep, toe-curling kiss. When Jennie pulls out to draw in a happy breath, the tallest girl turns both their phones off.

The rest of their lives can wait. Right then, however, Jennie and Lisa are set to celebrate their thorough love in the way they like it the most.

#jenlisa #jenlisa scenarios #blackpink scenarios #blackpink fanfic

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jenonctcity · 4 years

Text

My Addiction - Part 2

Differences – Lee Donghyuck

Part of the Bad Boy Series.

Badboy!Au

Warnings: Explicit Content, Fighting, Mentions of Blood, Drugs.

Word Count: 6.1k

Haechan had started his day off by waking up at the early time off 11am, which wasn’t early at all, but to Haechan that was an early start. After he’d laid in bed and scrolled through his Twitter feed aimlessly for a solid half an hour, he decided it was time to do something productive. He left his room, went for a pee, brushed his teeth, then decided he felt gross so had a quick shower, jerked off in the shower, got interrupted by Jaemin complaining he was taking too long, argued with Jaemin through the bathroom door, got dressed, had some toast, and finally sat down on the sofa with his phone in his hand ready to scroll through his Facebook feed.

“So,” Jeno’s voice made him look up from his phone, looking over at the blond-haired boy who had a dark bruise on his jaw from where your fist had connected with it. He held back the small smile that tried to fight its way onto his face and he wondered if your knuckles were sore at all from the brief encounter. “Why did you sweep (Y/N) away so quickly last night?” Haechan raised an eyebrow at his friends’ word, lowering his phone as Jeno now had his full attention.

“How do you know her name?” He asked, not having any inkling of an idea as to how Jeno knows your name.

“She went to our school.” Jeno shrugged. Haechan furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, how comes Jeno could remember you from school but he couldn’t? Him and Jeno spent nearly all of their time together in school, so when did he notice you?

“Yeah, I know that, I just didn’t think you’d remember her…”

“Anyway, are you two dating?”

“No!” Haechan quickly denied Jeno’s allegation, not wanting him to think that he was dating someone. Haechan didn’t like to date women. Instead he preferred to fuck them and maybe do it again sometime. He didn’t see the point in being tied down to someone when all he wanted to do was fuck other women. He didn’t want to end up like his father and cheat on his significant other, he refused to stoop that low. So if he didn’t have a girlfriend, then there was no one to cheat on. He has had girlfriends in the past, but they didn’t last long, mainly because they were too clingy and wanted his attention all the time.

“So you just took her home? But you were gone for ages.” Jeno seemed persistent with wanting to know what the two of them had been up to. Haechan didn’t particularly want Jeno to know he fucked your brains out in the back of his car, just in case Jeno knew something about you from school that he didn’t know. Something like you used to lick peoples lockers or some shit that is embarrassing.

“Erm we got hot chocolate and then I took her home. I had to calm her down, you had really pissed her off.” His words were kind of true, so he didn’t feel too bad about lying to Jeno. After he’d dropped you off at your home, he’d received a text from you, a few more messages later you’d both established a friends with benefits kind of relationship. “So anyway, what did you do to piss her off? She wouldn’t tell me.” He neglected to tell Jeno that the only reason he didn’t know why you’d punched Jeno was because he was too busy flirting with you and trying to get in your pants to have asked.

“I stood her friend up.” He shrugged with a sigh, before both of them turned their attention to the tiny toddler who came running into the room, with Renjun following close behind her.

“Who is going to be the best Uncle and watch Jiyeon for me for an hour?” Renjun asked with a smile on his face. The small baby that was starting to look more and more like her father every time Haechan saw her came running up to him with a smile plastered on her face. She’d only been waking for about a week, and she’d gotten a good grasp of it, running around everywhere and making it hard for everyone to keep tabs on her.

“I think she’s picked Uncle Haechanie.” Jeno sniggered, standing up quickly. “Besides I’m going to the gym, she can’t come with me.” Haechan groaned, but reached down and picked Jiyeon up anyway, setting her on the sofa beside him.

“1-hour Renjun and then I’m putting her up for adoption.” He spoke with a deadpan expression, but everyone knew he was only teasing, and he could end up watching her for multiple hours without caring.

“Deal. Just don’t give her to Jaemin.” Renjun laughed, quickly leaving with Jeno following him. Haechan looked down at the toddler sat beside him, letting out a long sigh before changing the television channel onto a kid’s cartoon.

---

It took you a few days to get over the overwhelming come down that had you teetering on the edge of a nervous breakdown. But you didn’t know what you expected, you always had the same experience after taking drugs, but that never seemed to stop you from taking the drugs. You burrowed yourself away in your house and called in sick to your dreary job at the local café which you hated more than anything. But after leaving school without achieving anything to prove your intelligence, you were stuck with a crappy job that barely paid your rent. But once you were over your headache, nausea, and paranoia, you decided it was time to get some dick…and some more drugs. You collected the money you’d saved up and shoved it in your pocket, putting on a simple pair of grey sweatpants with a black, long sleeved top that clung to your body. It was simply, but sexy. And you hoped Haechan thought the same thing. You didn’t bother texting him, deciding to surprise him with some sex. Men loved to be surprised by sex. Well that’s what you assumed.

After walking for twenty minutes you found yourself stood outside of the familiar doorway, running a hand through your hair and giving it a ruffle to try and bring on the sexy aura as you waited for someone to answer the door. You put on a subtle pout and put your hands on your hips as you waited. But as the door opened, you visibly deflated, a short, irritated sigh leaving your lips as your eyes laid on Jeno. He looked you up and down, folding his arms over his chest and leaning against the doorframe. He was wearing a white, sleeveless shirt that showed off his muscular biceps, completely clean of any tattoos. You knew he could probably throw you through the wall on the other side of the hallway, but he didn’t seem to want to kill you unlike he had after you’d punched him. You then noticed the white wraps he had around both of his hands and the sweat that dripped down the side of his face, his blond hair sticking to his forehead.

“Is Haechan here?” You didn’t bother greeting him, still pissed about what he did to your friend Leah.

“No.” He shook his head, running one of his hands over his head to push back his hair. “Do you want to come in? I want to ask you something…” Your first reaction to Jeno’s invite was to crease your eyebrows in confusion, your next reaction was to shrug and let yourself into the apartment, completely waking past him and navigating your way through the hallway to the living room. Jeno raised his eyebrows in surprise that you didn’t put up a fight and just let yourself in. He shut the door and followed you, seeing you sat on the sofa and making yourself comfortable before he sat beside you, keeping a space big enough for another person between you.

“So, what do you want to ask me?” You sat crossed legged on the sofa, keeping your eyes on Jeno in case he tried to pull anything as it seemed like no one else was in the apartment apart from the two of you. He slowly started to unwrap his hands, but kept his eyes on you, looking you in the eyes as he took a deep breath. You noticed the very faint bruise on his jaw from where you’d punched him and tried to hold back a smirk.

“Before I ask you anything, I’d like to apologise to you for how I acted last week, I shouldn’t have gotten mad at you for you sticking up for your friend when it was me who did the shitty thing and stood her up. So yeah, sorry about that. By the way, I would never had hurt you. I would never physically hurt a woman.” This had your face contorting into a smirk as you decided to lay the pressure on the boy sat beside you.

“So if you were fucking me from behind and I asked you to spank me, you wouldn’t do it?” Jeno almost choked on his own spit as your words hit his ears. His thick eyebrows raised, and his head darted forward slightly, a confused noise leaving his throat as he processed your words.

“I-I…well yeah…erm…anyway,” He stuttered over his words, blinking a few times as he tried to change to steer the conversation back to where it had started off. “I’m sorry…” You could see the sincerity in his eyes, and it was hard to imagine that this is the boy who had shown nothing but aggression towards you upon your first encounter with him. You remember him from school, but you hadn’t ever spoken to him, so you had to count last week as your first interaction with him. The boy that sat in front of you had soft eyes and a low, but soft tone to match his eyes.

“You’re forgiven. But you’re banned from going on any dates with my friends. Understood?” Your voice showed a lot of dominance which had a smile tugging at his lips as he nodded his head in confirmation.

“Yes boss…So are you and Haechan dating?” He put the wraps he had on his hand on the coffee table in front of you both and flexed his hands out, the veins prominent and causing your eyes to dart towards them. Your eyes trailed up his arms, noticing that the veins were showing on his biceps and forearms as well. He had a really good physique, and it was obvious to you that he worked out. You let out a soft laugh and shake your head.

“No, we’re just friends.”

“Oh, cool.” He turned his body more towards you once he was 100% sure that you and Haechan weren’t dating, because although Haechan had already told him that the two of you weren’t dating, he was pretty sure that his younger friend was lying to him. “I didn’t think that the two of you spoke at school.” This had your ears pricking up. Whenever anyone mentioned that they remembered you from school you always felt your heart rate speed up in anxiousness.

“We didn’t…did he tell you we did?” Your voice was now weaker, your courage dwindling as you tried to play it cool not wanting him to see your internalised panic.

“No I just assumed that you did because we all went to the same school.” You quickly shook your head and cleared your throat.

“You remember me from school?” You weren’t sure you wanted to hear his answer, but you’d already let the words slip from your mouth, so it was too late.

“Yeah, I spent a lot of time people watching. You were quiet, nose always in a book with your uniform perfect, you sat alone at lunch and I remember that you punched a girl in the nose before you disappeared. And the next time I see you you’re punching me in the face too.” He let out a laugh, clearly finding the circumstances ironic. “No one knew why you disappeared, to be honest not many people talked about it.” You bit your bottom lip and glanced down, feeling the rush of reminiscence as it came to you. It didn’t feel good though, in fact it left a horrible taste in your mouth. You felt slightly touched that Jeno had remembered you though, not many people you encountered from high school since leaving actually remembered that you went to school with them.

“I got kicked out. That’s why I disappeared.” Your voice was softer and Jeno could sense that he touched a nerve. He smiled slightly and let out a soft sigh.

“You haven’t got to explain yourself to me if you don’t want to.” He reached out, hesitantly placing his hand on your own as it sat on your knee. You looked up in surprise, your eyes flicking from his hand to his eyes. There was something about the blond guy that made you feel safe and secure, and it wasn’t just his physical appearance. You hardly knew him, but as you looked at him it was hard to believe that this was the man who had the heart to stand up your friend. You could see that he was genuinely curious as to why you got kicked out of school and ended up where you are now. A thought popped into your head, and before you could filter it, it was already leaving your lips.

“I’ll tell you my story if you tell me why you stood Leah up.” You felt his hand squeeze your own, before he lifted your palm into his and shook it like you were making a deal.

“Deal.” He dropped your hand and instead placed his hand back in his own lap, his other arm laying across the back of the sofa behind you, almost like he had his arm around you.

“The girl I punched was trying to spread a rumour around that I had chlamydia, I confronted her, and she started to laugh in my face. I’d had enough of people thinking I was just a weak, quiet girl, so I punched her. Of course the teachers came running and next thing I know, I’m being kicked out for aggression. I got a job at a small restaurant and met this guy…” You paused as the thought of your first boyfriend came into your mind. He was the only guy you’d ever dated, and once the relationship was over, you’d decided not to commit to another man that could break you in the way he did. You took a deep breath and looked into Jeno’s eyes. “He was sweet at first, but then after we started sleeping together, he changed. I then found out he was addicted to drugs, he’d do all sorts, but it was mostly heroin. I made the mistake of trusting him, and the sex turned…awful. I started to smoke weed just before we’d have sex so I wouldn’t really be focused on it.” You felt your throat tighten, but you willed your emotions away, not wanting Jeno to see your weakness. “In the end it wasn’t enough, and I’d steal some of his cocaine just to put up with the sex.”

“Why did you keep having sex with him then?” Jeno piped up before you could continue on with your story.

“He would get violent if I didn’t…in the end he got locked up for drug dealing just after I broke things off with him.” It felt strange telling somebody your story, but it also felt like a weight had been lifted from your shoulders.

“Asshole.” He mumbled, his fists clenching as he looked away from you, not wanting to see the pain that laid behind your glistening eyes. But it then occurred to him that you were probably looking for Haechan tonight because you wanted what he was known for selling.

“Yep…” You awkwardly smiled, your palms sweaty as you rubbed them against your sweatpants to try and dry them. Jeno didn’t try to dig anymore, instead deciding to steer your mind away from your own past by holding up his end of the deal.

“I stood Leah up because I had a fight that I needed to go to, also because I didn’t really feel like going on a date that evening. I know it’s a shitty excuse, but I didn’t think about how it would hurt her feelings.” You let out a laugh and bit your bottom lip. Jeno tilted his head, a small smile playing on his lips as he watched you. “Why are you laughing?”

“Because Leah’s feelings weren’t hurt. She was just mad that she wasn’t going to get any dick that night, so she pretended she was upset when she called me to rant.” You shrugged and watched as his smile grew, his eyes slowly becoming less visible as you noticed his eyes turned into crescent moons when he found something amusing. “She’s a bit of…hmm…how do I word this? ...she likes to sleep around basically, and she’s over it now. To be honest you probably dodged a bullet, she’s a bit of a nightmare with men.”

“So why did you punch me?!” He laughed along with you.

“Because I thought she was genuinely upset at first! Then I told her what I did, and she told me that she wasn’t that bothered. I was being a good friend!” You tried to justify your actions, but Jeno didn’t look like he cared that much that you’d hit him. In fact he seemed to find the whole thing rather amusing.

“You have one hell of a punch on you for a gi-” He was cut off by your fist colliding with his arm. “Ow!” It didn’t hurt him, but he pretend it did and rubbed at the spot you’d hit.

“For a girl?! You deserved that one.” You shook your head, amusement still evident on your face. You weren’t offended by the sexist remark he was about to make because you could tell it was all in jest.

“Okay fair enough, I was only joking by the way, I know how many girls who could probably put me on my ass.”

“You said you fight? What do you mean by that?”

“I do underground fighting. It’s not legal, but its good money. And I’m good at it.” He smirked, clearly proud of himself for his work. You opened your mouth to reply but before you could the sound of men’s voices and the front door closing echoed throughout the apartment. You and Jeno both turned your attention to the doorway as Haechan, Jaemin, and Renjun came through the door. You remembered Jaemin from when he answered the door and nearly felt your wrath the week prior. And you remembered Renjun from school. The more you looked at Jaemin though, the more his face looked familiar to you from when you went to school together.

“You’re back early.” Jeno raised an eyebrow as they all made themselves comfortable on the sofas. Haechan’s eyes attached onto you and stayed focused on you when he realised who the girl was sat beside Jeno. He frowned, jealous that you’d been alone with Jeno, his possessiveness shining through despite him not really having any attachment to you. His eyes didn’t fail to notice how Jeno’s arm was on the back of the sofa behind you either, making his frown deepen. He flopped down between you and Jeno without any shame, prompting Jeno to remove his arm from the back of the sofa.

“We got kicked out of the club.” Jaemin spoke, kicking off his shoes and relaxing back on the sofa cushions, the television remote in his grip.

“Why?” Jeno asked with confusion evident on his face.

“They thought we were snorting coke in the toilets.” Jaemin shrugged and turned on the television, not taking his eyes off of it as he spoke to Jeno.

“Were you snorting coke?” You asked with an amused tone in your voice. Jaemin suddenly turned his attention towards you like it was the first time he’d actually noticed your presence. He sniffed and cleared his throat, turning his attention back to the television.

“…Yeah…” He mumbled causing you to let out a short laugh. Haechan cleared his throat, turning to look at you. He gave you a look that said he was confused, and you assumed he was confused about your presence. You stood up and smiled awkwardly.

“I’m going to get going, see ya.”

“Wait I’ll drive you home.” Jeno stood up too. You didn’t notice but Haechan gave Jeno a look that could kill.

“It’s fine you don’t have to!” You felt bad that he wanted to drive you home, not wanting him to go out of his way for you.

“Actually,” Haechan stood up, getting between the both of you subtly. “I have some things I want to speak to (Y/N) about, so I’ll take her.” He put as much dominance in his words as he could, and Jeno just shrugged. You didn’t bother arguing, not really caring which one of the boys took you home. But you could kind of sense the testosterone levels rising in the air, as if the two of them were about to have a pissing match. Just as Haechan started to lead you out of the room, Jeno called out to you.

“(Y/N) wait,” He rushed over to you, pulling phone out from his pocket. “Give me your number and I’ll text you. Just in case you wanted someone to talk to or if you ever get into a sticky situation.” You glanced up at Haechan, see that he averted his hard gaze so that he wasn’t watching either of you. But you also noticed that his jaw was clenched.

“Sure!” You smirked, taking his phone and saved your number into it, passing it back to him. You thought it was funny that Haechan was getting this possessive and jealous over his friend when he was the one who was fucking you, not Jeno. “Bye Jeno.” You both said your goodbyes and Haechan pulled the front door shut with a loud bang.

“Why were you there with Jeno?” He didn’t waste time in asking you the burning question that was on his mind, his hand on your wrist as he guided you down the many stairs to the entrance of the apartment building.

“Well,” You started, but paused as you got into his car, pulling on your seatbelt before continuing. “I was there for you; thought I’d surprise you with some pussy.” You shrugged, looking over at him to see his reaction. He bit his bottom lip, starting the car up before looking at you. He had lust burning like a fire behind his dark eyes, it only being visible from the streetlight that he was parked underneath. He licked his bottom lip, starting to drive as erotic thoughts ran through his head.

“You’re a dirty girl, that doesn’t answer my question though. Why were you with Jeno?”

“Are you jealous?” You shot right back at him, making his jaw clench again and his knuckles to turn white as his grip on the steering wheel got harder.

“No. Answer the god damn question (Y/N).”

“Fine! He just apologised for standing my friend up and we got talking. That’s it. He’s really nice actually.” You could tell that your words had relieved some of the tension in Haechan’s shoulders, his body visibly relaxing as he realised that nothing happened between his friend and his fuck buddy.

“Yeah he is…” He sighed, not really wanting to feel hostile towards the man that was more like his brother than his friend. “Did he tell you he remembers you from school?”

“He did…we talked about that.” You didn’t really want to go through the whole story again with Haechan, but you wanted to get it out of the way with, so you cleared your throat nervously and gave him a brief run down about your past like you had with Jeno. He listened to you, stopping outside your apartment complex and turning to face you.

“Is that why you wanted drugs when he fucked?” He looked down at his lap, not really knowing how he should be feeling about everything you’d just opened up to him about. He felt a bit sick now that he knew why you wanted drugs, but he didn’t feel like he could be the person to tell you to stop doing them, not knowing you well enough to feel like he could do that. He felt a little bit numb but hid it well.

“Yes. I just relate sex with being high. I only told you because I didn’t want Jeno to tell you and then you would be mad because I didn’t tell you.” You shrugged, taking off your seatbelt. “Anyway, thanks for the ride.” You opened the door but paused when Haechan piped up.

“I understand, but you don’t have to do that when we have sex. I’ll never make you do anything you don’t want to do. I just want you to know that.” He gave you a soft smile and it was the first time you’d seen him be so sincere and sweet. It made your heart flutter in a way that it hadn’t in a long time. But you ignored it, knowing it was dangerous to let your heart do that in response to something a man had said, a man who you only had a sexual relationship with. “Besides, I can make you feel good enough that you don’t need that shit.” You couldn’t help the smile that tugged at the corner of your lips.

“Thanks…hey do you want to come in?” You let out a gentle laugh and winked at him. “Put your money where your mouth is?” He let out a laugh, a smug smile on his face as he thought about your offer. He opened his door and got out of the car, the two of you walking up to your apartment together, his hand resting on your ass.

---

Weeks flew by, and you found yourself splitting your time between work, getting your back blown out by Haechan, and spending time with Jeno. Haechan didn’t know that you were spending time with Jeno, and Jeno didn’t know that you had been riding Haechan’s dick four times a week. It didn’t matter to you though, because you didn’t think either of them needed to know. Jeno was just a friend, and Haechan was just a friend you fucked. Who you chose to spend your time with was neither of their concerns. What you had noticed was your growing affections for the drug dealer that you shared a bed with. There was something about how he was kiss you just before ravaging your body that caused your stomach to fill with butterflies. It scared you. But you knew that you’d broken the one rule you’d set aside for yourself. The rule of not catching feelings for Haechan. But it happened so quick that you couldn’t stop it. He was a gentle lover…sometimes. And you felt like you had a constant craving for the feel of his lips on your own. No wonder they say that love is like a drug, it’s addictive, and you felt like you could stop taking all the other drugs you did in favour of having Haechan. You wanted to do more than just have sex with him, like hold his hand, go on dates, get food together. But you couldn’t tell him this, it would more than likely scare him away, and then you wouldn’t have him at all, which was worse than supressing your feelings for him. Sometimes you thought that maybe it would be better if you had caught feelings for Jeno. He was a caring man, and you really enjoyed his company. Which is why you found yourself going on a date with him. The date went well, but you still couldn’t force yourself to feel romantic feelings for Jeno. You didn’t have the heart to tell him this, so you just ignored his messages for the past 24 hours and hoped he didn’t see you as you snuck into Haechan’s room the night after.

Haechan had your legs over his shoulder, jackhammering his hips into yours as you whined from the intense feeling of your orgasm slowly building, like a fire having fuel splashed over it. The bed squeaked underneath your bodies in time to Haechan’s hard cock hitting all the right places inside of you. Beads of sweat trailed down the side of his face, the vein in his neck prominent as he put all his force into the motion of his hips.

“Fuuuuck.” You whimpered; your arms pinned above your head on the pillow by one of his hands. You wanted to touch him, but he was restricting you from doing so, so instead you squeezed your eyes shut and tried to cope with the ministrations he was doing to your body.

“Jeno can’t fuck you like I can.” He grunted into your ear unexpectedly, causing your stomach to drop.

“Huh?” You were confused as to why he suddenly brought up Jeno while he was balls deep inside of you.

“The way he looks at you, you don’t see it, but I do. He wants to do to you what I’m doing to you so badly baby girl.” His voice was low, and you moaned involuntarily as the ball inside of you wound itself tighter, your orgasm knocking at the door. You didn’t want to tell him that you did in fact see the way that Jeno looks at you. He looks at you with affection and infatuation in his eyes. Of course you’d seen it, but Haechan hadn’t been able to see past his own jealousy to see that Jeno wanted more than just to fuck you. It surprised you that Jeno hadn’t even told Haechan about the date he’d taken you on, but you didn’t really want to message Jeno to ask him why.

“I’m yours.” The sultry way that those wicked words left your lips had Haechan letting out a high-pitched whine, his hips stilling as his cock released hot ropes of cum inside of your warm walls. He continued to ram his hips inside of you after he got over the initial feeling of his orgasm, your own high rocking through you like a raging bull as your toes curled and thighs started to quiver on his shoulders.

“Yeah, you are mine.” He growled, slowly pulling your legs from his shoulders and grabbing the towel he’d left on the floor from his shower the night prior. He cleaned the both of you up before he pulled a joint out of his bedside table. He lit it and took a long drag before he laid in bed beside you, pulling you to his bare chest and holding the joint to your lips. You took a puff and released the smoke into the air. This is the closest thing to affection you’d ever had from Haechan, and it was merely some cuddling after sex. “Why didn’t you tell me that you went on a date with Jeno?” His question shocked you, because you assumed he had absolutely no idea about it. You gulped, your stomach flipping as your words got caught in your throat. “He really likes you, how the hell could I crush my best friend by telling him that I’ve been having sex with you for the past month when he finally finds a girl that he likes?” His voice had a tone to it that you couldn’t quite put your finger on, but it left you with a guilty feeling in your stomach.

“He told you this…?”

“Yes, after he got back from your date last night. I had no idea you’d even been spending time with him…” He took another drag of the weed and let his head fall back against the pillow.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you; I didn’t think it would matter.” You awkwardly played with his duvet, guilt sitting heavy on your heart.

“I don’t care. Date whoever you want,” Those words turned your guilt into hurt. You wanted him to care. It made you wish even harder that you felt things for Jeno and that you were in Jeno’s arms, purely because you knew he cared for you. “I just feel bad for Jeno…” You didn’t respond to him, instead letting the haze of weed take over your body as you took another drag from the joint.

“Haechan have you heard from (Y/N) at all?” The voice sounded just before the door opened. “I haven’t hea-” Jeno paused in the doorway, his hand still on the doorknob as his eyes landed on you and Haechan, naked…in bed…together. “What the fuck?!” His face hardened, his eyebrows scrunching up and his jaw clenching. You gasped, quickly jumping out of bed with the duvet on your body, completely exposing Haechan as he jumped up from the bed on the other side. Your eyes widened as you stared at Jeno, your mouth opening and closing as you tried to form words.

“It’s not what it looks like.” Haechan spoke, pulling on his boxers and a t-shirt quickly.

“Then what the fuck is it huh? Kinda funny how I tell you that I like her, then suddenly she isn’t replying to my texts, and now I find you in bed together!” Jeno’s voice raised, anger prominent on his features as he approached Haechan.

“Back off Jeno.” Haechan wasn’t afraid to stand up to Jeno and it shows, despite how much aggression and intimidation Jeno was showing in that moment. You hadn’t seen this side of Jeno since the night you’d punched him, and you forgot how scary he could look. You stayed silent, knowing you couldn’t do anything to cease the fight about to happen.

“Fuck off. You’re supposed to be my fucking friend and you pull this shit.” Jeno shoved Haechan hard, to which Haechan responded by clenching his fists and getting in Jeno’s face.

“Stop!” You cried out, watching with worried eyes, but neither of the men paid any attention to you.

“I’ve been fucking her for the past month, and you didn’t even know.” Haechan whispered, a smirk playing on his lips as he taunted Jeno, not meaning to be horrible to his brother but not wanting to be showed up like that in front of you. Jeno raised his fist and within the blink of an eye the two of them were throwing fists at each other like teenager boys fighting over their crush. Instead of two men fighting over a troubled woman.

“Stop!” You screamed, tears filling your eyes as you watched Jeno shove Haechan up against the wall, clearly winning the fight with his experience. You didn’t even notice when Renjun and Jaemin ran into the room and separated two of them, tears streaming down your cheeks as you cried for the first time in over a year. Jaemin held Jeno back, and Renjun held Haechan back, as both of them struggled to get to each other. Haechan’s nose was clearly broken, blood streaming down over his lips and Jeno having hardly any damage to his face.

“You need to fucking choose (Y/N). Me or him?” Jeno shouted at you, causing you to flinch. All four men went still as their eyes trained on you, still stood in the corner of the room with the duvet bundled up to your chest. You shook your head, unable to process your thoughts as you looked between the two men. One of them not showing that he had any feelings towards you, and that you were just a body to keep his bed warm when he wanted it. The other a soft-hearted man who looked at you like he could give you the world. You were trying to choose between heartache or love. A love that could potentially end up in heartache as you didn’t feel the way he felt towards you. “Pick one!” He was getting impatient, his voice cracking as it started to dawn on him what had happened. Haechan wiped at his face, smearing the blood as he watched you.

You continuously looked between the two of them, gripping at the fabric of the duvet tighter and gulping as you spoke. Before turning to the man you decided to choose.

“I choose you…”

---

Hey! Thanks for reading! What do you think is going to happen next? Let me know your thoughts, I love feedback so please tell me what you think.

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nadohunter · 3 years

Text

Alright, you want to go this ham on this insane kind of reaching? Alright, lets go, since anons love being this bold and thinking they're doing something.

I'm incredibly confused where this is coming from, you are doing some MAJOR jumping and putting words in my mouth.

In my most recent post which I'm assuming this is what its about, I'm wondering if your reading comprehension is literally in the toilet??? I only said shipping adults x minors is bad? Because I expressed that since I was LITERALLY 13 fucking years old in this goddamned fandom i've been harassed by people, often grown ass adults for DARING to say I didn't like it??? That to me it felt morally wrong? Because I voiced my reasoning for leaving kuroshitsuji as a fandom because its been damaging to my health so I'm making the PERSONAL CHOICE TO STEP AWAY FROM IT.

Also in all of my posts where I've ever talked about any of my opinions on this stuff I've always said weather you think someone is doing something bad or not explicitly to NOT bug them or send them messages? Especially not ones that threaten them because I LITERALLY SAID, I HAVE BEEN TOLD TO KMS FROM THIS DAMN FANDOM BECAUSE I DARED SAY I'M NOT COMFORTABLE WITH SOMETHING? Because I know people who have been hurt by it??? And I've said many many many fucking times that if someone IS dangerous it is STILL in your best interests not to harass them because you do not want to put yourself in the path of someone dangerous?

And what the fuck is this line about me saying 'yaoi is fetishization' is terf rehtoric? I'm guessing your talking about a post where I gently disagreed with someone... not shipping a m|m ship "because they're both tops". What the fuck are you on? Me saying 'it seems degrading to boil down gay relationships to this' is me being a terf now?

This is so much reaching. Do I agree with everything anti-proships do? No, I feel like me defending sebawill because someone called it 'inherently abusive' should say that much. However seriously defending p*dophillia because you like getting your rocks off to that, to people who have been traumatized due to it using a dumbass anology that Hitler drank water??? No fucking shit we don't stop drinking water because water is a normal thing we drink to survive?? What do you fucking drink p*dophillia to survive??? If you think you need to consume p*dophillic content to survive I think that's a you problem. Believe it or not people are capable of complex thought? I can make the personal choice to block people who make certain types of content. I am well within my right to do so. I am allowed to say "I don't like this" and frankly the amount of people, CHILDREN that have been hurt by this bullshit, is too many.

Your immediate response to someone coming forward saying they've been groomed by this bullshit should be compassion, not LET PEOPLE SHIP WHAT THEY WANNNTTT. Your immediate reaction should always be fucking compassion. But its not, and then you wonder why people think this kind of B.S. is so morally reprehensible. Normalizing p*dophillia is bad. Telling children, they should be okay with it because its 'not real'. is bad. Fantasizing... about p*dophillia should be a sign that you need to go get help, because that is not healthy, even if you never act on it with a real person.

If you want to invoke... fucking Hitler I guess, no, you know what this is like? This is like telling a jewish person they should be okay with someone drawing fetish art of fucking n*zis. That they should be okay with writing a fic that downplays and romanticizes the h*locost.

Sorry I care more about real people than fucking fiction I guess?

If pr*shippers supposedly 'just want to be left alone' then fucking leave other people alone too? I'm literally changing my focus because this fandom and pr*shipper types have not: left me the fuck alone, despite ignoring them when they bombared me with messages calling me a bitch, calling my art ugly, threatening to 'expose' me for being a horrible person? But you have the gall to get up on your high horse and talk to me like that when clearly you haven't properly read a goddamned thing i've ever said and are just dead set on defending what again I can only assume to be p*dophillia because that's what I was saying in the context of being honest about the harassment I got from adults as a minor for just saying i was uncomfortable with it.

And honestly??? Thank you anon. You proved my fucking point. You just proved why I am so sick and done with this fandom and have made the personal choice to move on. I made a post explaining to a someone why I have made the personal choice to leave and no longer post anything outside of the comic for it. You know what I haven't done? What you just fucking did. If your so high and mighty, you know what you could have done "Ugh, I don't agree with her, I won't interact!" You know... unlike the giant hypocrite and whoever else has been leaving a ton of lovely messages for me over the past few months.

I have not left any nasty or even accusatory messages in anyone's inbox because unlike what you seem to want to accuse me of? I chose to say my piece and remove myself from the situation, because after two fucking months of this exact kind of bullshit that I chose to ignore rather than go send people shitty messages, I'm done. I'm moving on.

#massive tw #tw #tw mention of suicide baiting #tw pedophillia mention #this will be my final word on it #tw holocaust mention #tw nazi mention #tw hitler mention #long post

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rachelbethhines · 4 years

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Tangled Salt Marathon - Rapunzeltopia

This episode, much like many other plot important episodes of the first two seasons, is decent on it its own, but becomes retroactively worse due to season three’s bad writing and behind the scenes bullshit.

Summary: Matthews reveals himself as another dark spirit and disciple of Zhan Tiri, and traps Eugene, Lance and the others in unbreakable vines similar to the Great Tree's evil magic. He has Rapunzel live the perfect life while he prepares to hand over the mystical powers of the Sundrop to his master. Fortunately, Rapunzel is able to make contact with her brown-haired dream self and attempts to convince her to let go.

Timeline Alert

So what does almost a year ago mean? The Great Tree was six months out, and then in Mirror, Mirror, Lance said that they been fighting for three weeks since. So how long have then been stuck in this shell house? Because You’re Kidding Me was just the next day after Mirror, Mirror. Was Lance’s ‘three weeks’ comment meant to be after Brothers Hooks and Rapunzel: Day One and not Great Tree? Are we 7, 8, 9, or 10 months out from Secret of the Sundrop? Like be clear about your time frame guys if you’re going to use it as a plot point.

I’m going to say we are 9 months along on this trip, just cause that sounds closer to ‘almost a year ago’ without keeping them all trapped in the shell house for months. So Great Tree is 6 months, Brother’s Hook and Rapunzel Day One is 7 months, Mirror, Mirror is going on 8 months, and at the end of this episode they’ll be heading into the 9 month period...I guess. Lets just say they were trapped there for a week or two.

This Episode Only Highlights How Self Centered and Immature Rapunzel Still Is Rather Than Showcase How Much She’s Grown

The point behind this episode is show how much Rapunzel has grown since season one, and how she is accepting of responsibility now, but it actually backfires because she’s not actually being challenged on her selfish desires but on her lack of agency. Which is the wrong lesson that she needs to be learning at this point in her development.

Rapunzel in her subconscious mind doesn’t wish for what’s best for other people but what’s best for herself. People she must interact with on the regular have to be superficially happy even if it completely warps their character. While people she doesn't care about, like Lady Caine, can just be simply banished and ignored regardless if they deserve such an end or not. She doesn’t see people as people with individual thoughts and feelings, but as satellites to herself and her narrow worldview.

Also, ‘I believe everyone deserves a second chance’ my eye! Caine never gets even a first chance in Rapunzel’s own fantasy world. Because Rapunzel is a selfish hypocrite who’s ‘redemptions’ always comes with strings attached.

Here Comes the Dumbest Plot Point In the Show

I’ll talk about this more when we get to season three, but this scene is the beginning of the end for any dignity the show once held.

Also why would ‘I don’t trust anyone’ Cassandra follow a creepy voice calling her name through a doorway inside a magic house that’s tried to kill her twice now?

If you gotta make you character act out of character in order to get your plot rolling than you haven’t a good plot. Think of something else.

What’s the Point of Having Two Names?

They did this both with Sugarbee and Matthews here and it makes zero sense. Why would they need to bother with fake names if the heroes wouldn’t even recognize their real names to begin with? Such revelations add nothing and fails to tell the audience anything new about the characters. It’s also not consistent as it turns out Gothel was a disciple too and she only gets one name, so what gives?

So How Does This All Work Again?

So Zhan Tiri needs ‘a clash of the sundrop and moonstone’ in order to be freed from her prison. Why? I don’t know, but holding Rapunzel prisoner for life actually undermines that plan, and it’s a plan that Zhan Tiri is currently setting up with Cassandra off screen during all of this.

So does Tromus/Matthews just not know that Zhan Tiri is already ‘free’ and has her own plans?

Is Rapunzel’s power being drained what gives Zhan Tiri a foothold in the real world?

Or was Zhan Tiri released back in the Great Tree with the removal of the spear and that’s why she knows to go after Cass?

What was up with the Great Tree and the sealed tree back in Painter’s Block? Did they have any impact on Zhan Tiri’s plans?

Were any of the disciples actually useful at all?

So What Do the Disciples Gain From All This?

Sugarbee, Matthews, and Gothel were all once real people who actually lived so what are their reasons for following Zhan Tiri? What do they gain from going through such complicated plans? Why continue to follow someone after you’ve been dead for centuries and are a ghost now, and were presumably trapped and or killed by Demantius for following her? Real people don’t just hold on to such fanatical devotion without reason.

This Conflict Over Choices Does Not Work Without Varian

Going back to how this episode fails to develop Rapunzel; it wants to have Rapunzel take responsibility for difficult choices, but much like Painters Block, it completely ignores her biggest fuck up thereby undermining why she has trouble with owning up to hard choices.

Rapunzel ruined a child’s life. She may not have meant to but she did, and thus far she has done nothing to make amends for it. She’s not even spared the poor boy a single thought beyond seeing him as the boogeyman in a nightmare once.

You can’t have Rapunzel take responsibility for anything if you won’t hold her accountable for anything.

Varian was meant to appear in this episode, and indeed he should have for the above reason.

But of course Chris had to give us a bullshit excuse for why he cut the most plot important character from the series.

I’ve already spoken about how Varian’s cameo in Happiness Is did nothing to actually further develop Rapunzel nor explore her guilt back in that review. In this episode, however, I want to discuss how hollow the comparisons to Gothel is and why there shouldn’t logically have been any competition between the two.

Varian and Gothel provide two completely different conflicts and two completely different points of development for Rapunzel’s arc. Gothel is the instigator of her conflict with Rapunzel. Rapunzel, as the victim, has only one thing to learn, self esteem. She learned it back in the movie, she relearned it back in the season one, and here she’s re-contextualizing it for this episode’s mini-arc.

Meanwhile Rapunzel is the instigator of her conflict with Varian. She’s the one with the power in their relationship and her choices matter. She doesn’t need to learn agency because she already has it. What she needs to learn is responsibility and she can’t do that without confronting Varian and what she did in some manner. So unlike with Gothel there only new ground to cover here rather than rehashing old conflicts.

Chris Sonnenburg has things all backwards. Rapunzel’s agency/self-esteem issues and her need to take responsibility for her actions are not interchangeable conflicts. Addressing one does not automatically address the other, and of the two her conflict with responsibility holds more weight because it’s ongoing. We haven’t seen the resolvement there. It also affects more people than just herself so the stakes are higher there as well. And to top it all off, it fits with the themes of the episode better.

Also, you very much could have had both characters because they both reflect different conflicts and serve different purposes in the narrative. Time management in television is a very big deal yes, but you have little grounds for defense when all you’ve shown is how poorly you’ve managed your time until now.

In short, Chris is full of shit.

No, It Wouldn’t

We’ve already established that there’s no need for Rapunzel to go on her quest in season two. The black rocks are inactive, there’s no ticking clock she has to beat, and her staying at home would have actually prevented the conflicts in season three.

Unless dream Rapunzel is referring to Zhan Tiri being released, but even that is false because Zhan Tiri is already floating around a little blue ghost girl off screen right now. What Rapunzel choses or chooses not to do does not change that.

Lack of external conflict undermines internal conflict.

Just Cause You Make A Meta Joke About Your Heroes Being Dumb For No Reason, Does Not Make Them Any Less Stupid

Jokingly admitting a fault in your writing doesn’t not excuse that fault. If you can’t have a plot without handing the idiot ball to your characters than you haven’t a good plot. Time to go back to drawing board.

Season Three Will Go Back On This Episode’s Message and Prove the Villian Right

I’ve liget seen fans unironically praise the show for it’s message of ‘be content with what you have’. Not only is that a terrible lesson to teach children; it’s actually the exact opposite of what the show is trying to achieve.

“Be satisfied” is suppose to be the wrong motto. Rapunzel is suppose to be fighting against this message. In the episode itself it’s the villian who is saying such things in order to tempt her to stay put.

So how could anyone look at the show as a whole and come away with idea that the one off villain was right along?

Because season three does a complete 180 away from its original messages regarding agency and responsibility. All consequences disappear from the story and the mains are given convenient scapegoats to distract from their decisions. Characters actively regress and are rewarded by the narrative for either not doing anything or for victim blaming others for their actions.

But most damaging of all is the fact that nearly everyone winds up back where they started out at, or aren’t given a proper ending at all. Tangled’s story is just one giant circle and that in of itself contradicts the idea of progress.

Cassandra’s Hurt Hand Is Only Relevant When The Story Wants Rapunzel to Feel Guilty About Something

Oh but we can just throw Cassandra’s burnt hand in here as a substitute Rapunzel’s guilt over Varian. Even though the two incidents should actually complement one another rather than compete for dominance.

Tangled doesn’t trust its audience to remember things. It acts like if it’s off screen or not being focused upon than it’s not happening or isn’t relevant. This undermines any ongoing or overarching conflicts.

Why should we care about Cassandra’s arm if she’s been shown as being fine with it for four episodes by now? Especially since it’ll never come up again after this point? And on the flip side of things, why should the audience not care about the 15 year old who has been sitting in a dungeon for almost a year now due to Rapunzel’s neglect?

We’re not magpies who are quickly distracted by shiny new things. We are capable of retaining information and informing decisions based off of that. Especially if Chris was shooting for the teen audience as he claims he was.

Oh But We Got Time For Godzilla-Pascal

Can’t spare even half a minute for a Varian cameo that would be relevant, but we sure got time to waste on a pointless action sequence that does nothing to further the character in what is meant to be a character development episode.

This Scene Is Out of Character

That’s not how abuse works!

The whole reason why Gothel was able to keep Rapunzel under her thumb for 18 years because Rapunzel always sought her approval. Never at any point, even when finally choosing to break away from her in the movie, did Rapunzel wish to harm the woman. That goes against who she is as a character and it’s not how abuse victims respond to abusers even after cutting things off with them.

If anything, Rapunzel’s treatment of Frederic in Happiness Is is more in line with how a victim goes about mourning the loss of an abusive relationship. Victims grieve for what might have been. Victims mourn the loss of what good times they had with their abusers, because yes, abusers aren’t abusive 100% of the time 24/7. They can’t be or they risk losing their victim quicker.

I initially was ok with flashbacks to Gothel on occasion because no victim ever makes a completely clean break from their abuser. Even ‘moving on’ isn’t some triumphant singular action when you stand tall while you knock your opponent down in a wish fulfilment fantasy.

No. ‘Moving on’ is slow. It’s understated. It’s routine. It’s about being able to do the dishes without getting triggered. It’s sitting at lunch with friends and being happy and calm without the fear of returning home hanging over your head. It’s not skipping out on work because your anxiety is through the roof over just meeting with your boss. It’s not devolving into a yelling match over something minor because you internalize your abusers behavior.

Abuse victims don’t celebrate violence as strength. We celebrate being an unmovable mountain of clam fortitude. Being in control even as the world rages at us, because we’re self assured.

The fact that this scene exists, while Happiness Is shows Rapunzel behaving the opposite way to the father who abused her the same as Gothel did, only proves that a man shouldn’t have been in charge of this show. Certainly not without a woman by his side giving equal input.

Stop Using Destiny as a Shorthand for Everything!

Destiny isn’t a catch all word that can mean whatever you want it to. Words have definitions for a reason. Destiny isn’t a goal nor does it equate to agency and responsibility; kind of the opposite in fact.

Well That Was Redundant

All we did was rehash Rapunzel’s season one arc in under half in hour. Nothing new was learned. It’s like writers don’t know how to resolve any conflict that isn’t a repeat of the first movie. Meanwhile actual unique conflicts are just sitting off to the side being ignored. All because the show’s creator doesn’t want to hold his precious self insert accountable for anything.

Bye Bye Smart Cass, Hello Dumb Cass

So from this point onward the Cass we’ve known for nearly two seasons is gone. She’s just been replaced by the dumbest bitch on the planet. Because the writers don’t understand how manipulation and trauma actually works. Nor do they comprehend the importance of giving characters actual goals.

Conclusion

Season three is what retroactively spoils this episode. Cass’s dumb decision here, Zhan Tiri’s lack of a coherent plan, the uselessness of the disciples, and even the lack of Varian could have been glossed over had they writers given us a satisfying pay offs for any of the main conflicts. But they didn’t and so here we are.

Also a small update, but after this review and starting next week, the Salt Marathon will go from bi weekly updates to only one a week. This is a combination of real life work getting in the way and the growing length of the reviews. This means we’ll hopefully be done come March, which would mark the show’s anniversary. I got some plans to celebrate if that works out.

#tangled #anti-tangled #anti rapunzel #rapunzel's tangled adventure #tangled the series #varian

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wolffesimp · 4 years

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This is What War Does to You

summary: y/n is a doctor for the GAR. after a stressful day, obi wan seeks comfort from her.

warnings: 1.4 k words of trash. hurt to comfort fic. there is a lil bit of angst and there is also happy endings cuz i don’t write unhappy endings in MY CANON! 🥰

Rex was the first to run in, holding a trooper in his arms. In obvious disarray, he was looking around to try and find Y/N. His desperate eyes locked with hers. Y/N gaped, running to Rex. Just then, more injured troopers entered. Many familiar faces were in pain.

“Wh-what happened?” she was horrified, grabbing Rex’s arm to lead him to the medic bay. “I need all hands on deck! Troopers will be coming in soon!”

Rex set down the clone in front of Y/N.

“Injuries?”

“Leg and left arm.”

Stripping the clone of their armor, she found the sticky blacks hiding underneath. They had been bleeding profusely. She cringed as she unveiled their injuries. Two deep gashes from bullet wounds. Looking up, she found Rex’s tired eyes. He can’t be here, it’s just too much for him right now.

“Rex, honey, you need to leave. They are safe in my care.”

“But ma’am-”

“Do not fight with me right now. We cannot afford to have such arguments when your brothers are all in critical condition.”

Rex frowned as she began to turn on her medical droids and ready her tools. “I-I understand.”

She caressed his cheek gently. In no way did she mean to come off cold. But right now there was too much happening. Y/N couldn’t have him in her way. “Thank you, Rex. You are one of the bravest soldiers I know.”

And with that, he walked away. Assessing the troopers injuries, she mentally prepared herself for a long night. The entire bay was filled with clone troopers and their short-staffed medical team. Emitting a sigh, she began to work on the man in front of her.

How many more would she have to treat tonight?

Well, Y/N was beyond stressed. By the time of 6 AM, she was still working. The last trooper was being treated. Their injury wasn’t extensive, unlike the others that she treated. She made her medical team go to sleep earlier in the morning. So, she worked silently in the shroud of stars and hyperspace.

Suddenly she felt a presence. Looking behind her, she found a sleepy Obi Wan. He approached her, standing beside the head doctor. In his hands he held a tea and coffee. Completing the last stitch, she exhaled deeply. Y/N turned to the Jedi who offered her the coffee. Warmth filled her palms as she latched onto the cup. Eyes softening, she gave the Jedi the best smile she could muster in her drowsy state.

“I could just kiss you right now, Obi Wan. This means a lot to me.”

Obi Wan laughed. “How are you doing, Y/N?”

This is a dandy opportunity for Y/N to release all of her internalized stress and anger! Obi Wan sat down in a nearby chair. Y/N paused to take a sip of her coffee.

“I thought this was going to be a great way to help the GAR! Which, it is, but there is so much other shit going on! Like, I’m not just a doctor. I serve as a soldier in some situations where my medical attention is needed on the field. I help Cody and Rex strategize and provide mental support to any clone that needs it. And now, I have not one pain in the ass, but two entire legions of pains in my ass! No offense, but you Jedi are also crazy! Next thing I know you motherfuckers are gonna start flying around with your weird mind powers!”

“So, to answer your question, I am doing fan-fucking-tastic Obi Wan. Especially since you guys brought in at least 15 new soldiers for me and my team to scramble around and try to help without giving me any heads up!”

“I admit, that was inappropriate of me. But it wasn’t like we were expecting everything to go wrong.”

Sitting beside the General, she ran her fingers through his hair. “I know darling. There’s nothing you can do about it now though.”

He yawned. “Suppose so.”

“Have you gotten any sleep?”

“Only woke up a few minutes ago.”

Like a puppy, he curled into Y/N’s side.

“Just let me stay here for a little bit.” Obi Wan said

His arms wrapped around her waist. Burying his head into her upper chest, he intently listened to her heartbeat. Their position was slightly awkward, as the arms of the chairs separated their bodies slightly. But they made it work. Comfortingly, she continued to run her fingers through his hair. It always worked like a charm on the Jedi.

“Everything went wrong. No matter what we did-”

“What happened happened. You cannot go back in time, no matter how much you want to. There will always be lives lost in war. I am not saying that these deaths are meaningless. They most certainly are not. But, it is the expectation that people you love will die. That is why I hope there is a place we go after we die, reuniting with everyone who is gone.”

“Fate works in strange ways. Like how I joined the GAR and met all of you magical people. Nothing is a coincidence. In the end, we are all connected one way or another.”

“Now, you can look at the clone’s deaths however you like. But me personally? I will be thinking about the next time I see them. Not in pain, not sick, not dying in my arms, but happy. It is what they deserve. Only the best the afterlife has to offer.”

“War is ugly. You can never forget or escape it. I know some moments still haunt me in my sleep, and I haven’t fought nearly as many battles as they have. But what we have to do is get through it. To see the light at the end of the tunnel. I know it’s there and if we fight long enough, we will find it.”

Obi Wan was crying, she realized soon after her compelling speech. His body shook as silent sobs racked through his body. Arms tightening around her waist, grabbing at her supple skin. He needed something- anything to make him feel better. Like a child, he was deadlocked onto her. The pressure of being the perfect general and Jedi was prevealant in the wrinkles on his handsome face and the callouses on his hands.

Hot tears stained her shirt as they continuously fell from his face. Y/N held him impossibly closer, hoping her affection was enough to quell the sadness in his heart. Tears also began to fill her eyes. An immense sense of guilt fell over the two.

This is what war does to you.

It breaks you slowly. Even the strongest of people cried.

“It’s alright darling. It’s alright.”

They both knew it wasn’t.

“Nothing is lost so long as we continue to dream in color and fight with all we’ve got.”

To Obi Wan and Y/N, dreaming in color was fantasizing the ideal future. One where the Jedi weren’t held up to such high standards. One where the clones lived a full life doing whatever they liked, not judged by society because they all looked the same. One where Ahsoka felt like a real teenager and did teenager things. One where Padmé and Anakin get their happy ending. They could make it a reality so long as they fought hard enough.

Obi Wan tilted his head up. Just the sight of his heartbroken eyes cued Y/N’s floodgates. His bloodshot, golden orbs continued to be beautiful even in moments of pain. Neither were used to letting their guards down. She cupped the sides of his face, thumbs running over his deep and silky beard. Tears dripped down her chin and jaw as they shared the intimate moment.

“You stop that.” Obi Wan said

Weakly, he kissed her tears away. Soft lips collided on her skin. Heat coursed through her veins at the gesture. Closing her eyes, she let the last of her tears slip out. The salty taste lingered as he pulled her into his lap. Her legs wrapped around his torso. Pressing their foreheads against each other, they stared back at one another.

“You are the one that started crying first.” she teased softly

They both laughed despite the pain. It was something you learned to do after so many hardships. She rested her head in his neck.

“I forgot how tired I was...”

“Then go to sleep, darling.”

She didn’t need to be told twice. Just as she was doing to him a few moments ago, he began to play with her hair. Coaxing her to sleep, he mumbled things into her ear. But she caught one thing before she succumbed to slumber.

“I love you.”

a/n: WOOOOW IT HAS BEEN A MINUTE, Y’ALL! I am so glad that I worked past my writers block! I really do hope to be posting more content soon. Sometimes it’s just hard to force yourself to sit down and FINALLY write! But I did it! I’m hoping you guys enjoyed!

And as I always say, DO NOT BE AFRAID TO INTERACT! My ask box is ALWAYS open! My direct messages are OPEN! Comments are welcomed, as well as reblogs. I love you guys!

masterlist for more of my content

#tcw #the clone wars #obi wan kenobi #obi wan angst #obi wan x you #obi wan x y/n #obi wan fic #obi wan x reader #obi wan fluff #star wars prequels #sw prequels #ahsoka #anakin #anakin skywalker #Ahsoka Tano #sw ahso #captain rex #clone trooper rex #padme and anakin

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