#which is nice i still wear that a lot
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i’m not crazy for shopping but there is a very confidence building feeling when i find something in my style that fits me
#bought some clothes today and i surprisingly enjoyed it quite a bit#i'm very much a comfort over style person and don't usually care that much about what i wear#but i do wanna dress up when i go out and up until like 2 years ago i really didn't have nicer clothes for that#i think growing up i had a hard time with dressing up cause:#i don't like feminine clothing + i don't like more elaborate clothing (with a lot of patterns etc) + i don't like showing too much skin#+ i am too small for a lot of stuff on the men's section + i didn't even have the confidence to go to the men's section#+ i don't like shopping with other people#so like usually i would just wear jeans and a t-shirt#which is nice i still wear that a lot#but now i also wear other things or nicer shirts or different jeans or stuff to complimentthat#it took me a long time to find my style and i'm still figuring it out#i don't buy clothes often but it is nice to find something new and like how it looks on you#all of this to say i bought like 8 items today#which includes a leather jacker#something i've been waiting for years but could never find one that i liked the look on me#so this one i got today plus having just cut my hair is giving me a very appreciated confidence boost#my post
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I watched Avengers: Age of Ultron (apart from I skipped some overly long action sequences) and I am not sure so can someone tell me whether or not Tony Stark was the baddy in that film? Because about halfway through I was sure he was but then it was maybe just an evil robot after all and I am confused because either this film was surprisingly subversive or it was about robots hitting each other.
#I CANT STAND THE CONFUSION IN MY MIND#also i get why people wrote wanda/sylvie. they should go on a wholesome chick-flick revenge-quest together. and also they should kiss.#also i am now only *half* joking about thor being in love with mjolnir#it kept doing Christianity Bits which was quite awks.#not sure why it used the bit about building the church on a rock for some metal i mean wasn't jesus making a pun there? about peter?#i think Vision might be Jesus? or else he's Dr Manhattan who's done a first year philosophy course. could go either way on that tbh.#BUT TONY WAS THE BADDY RIGHT? WAS HE? WAS TONY THE BADDY OR NOT????#with the homocidal glitches in what he thinks is his winning personality?#and all the weapons he's made and is in fact still making but now he only sells them to The Good Guys?#except look how easily they fall out with each other and also don't a lot of innocent bystanders die in their overly long action scenes?#also i need to write fic about whether mjolnir does in fact obey some unknown code that can be cracked if you set your mind to it#she does like Robot Jesus so apparently we can rely on her to make the major decisions from now on#the ending's a bit ominous - apparently someone's collecting those TVA paperweights to do... something? Oh no! :O#yeah i watched the MCU in the wrong order shut up this was inevitable and Marvisney should just embrace that at this point#(i know 'Marvisney' will never catch on but that will not stop me using it)#the loki series ending is but the latest installment of “unlimited power with no oversight is fine as long as the Good people have it”#UNLESS TONY WAS ACTUALLY THE BADDY. WHICH AS I MENTIONED I AM NOT AT ALL CLEAR ON.#maybe what i mean is was tony stark the baddy *on purpose*?#i only picked this one to watch next because tumblr gifsets told me thor wears a nice coat in it#which he does! but only for a small fraction of the film :(#journey into the mcu#the avengers (the marvel ones not the other ones)
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Sorry, I can’t, I’m just too cute today 💕 (Patreon)
#Doodles#DDoodles#I have had a very good day today :D Lots of laughing and reading and playing and to top it off I look and feel extra cute :D#My favourite hoodie and a tank top underneath - realized recently it's a killer combo hehe#And a rainbow heart bandana my brother got my for Christmas <3#I have been wearing it and the other one he got me camp-counselor neck-scarf style for what I think are obvious reasons (Handplates)#And technically ''normal'' pants but they're a very shiny material lol#They're not leather or squeaky or anything they're this nice sleek and heavy material#Very nice to the touch :) Just very shiny!#I've always love the look of bare shoulders and everything else covered and yup! Looks cute on me too! Haha ♪#So since I was feeling so cute I decided to make it my warmup :) Which ironically lasted longer than my intended art of the day lol#Didn't feel like it tho! :0 I felt slow the whole way through both lol practice leaves me so quickly haha#Still tho :D Rather pleased with both!#A good expression of my good day hehe ♪#First digital of 2024 off to a good start ♫#[First uploaded Jan 5th] Lol
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Tuvok’s daughter is two things and two things only:
1) Trans
2) Not tired
#Asil#Tuvok is only capable of creating amab children but where they go from there is anyone's guess#out of this whole family only Sek and T'Pel are cishet#and sometimes T'Pel isn't v_v#Sek is that meme youtube video title that's like 'IN A WORLD...WHERE BEING STRAIGHT IS THE MINORITY...' and it has that girl sobbing#Sek is straight but such an ally that he had his first kiss with a guy (kar)#Asil insists she's a girl since she can talk and thus is referred to as such#when she gets older her entire family go to the temple she was blessed in and Asil goes through the process again#and she's welcomed into the family yet again under the name 'Asil' which her parents gave her again#in my mind it's a sign of great love/acceptance to be given a new name by your family since Vulcans seem to be very much about tradition and#familial pride/loyalty...being named again by family shows that you're still part of the family - still their child#it's a nice and important day v_v Asil gets lots of attention as the symbolic baby (though Varith is already born at this point)#Tuvok is wearing his starfleet uniform bc it's muscle memory but it's sort of funny to imagine him going back bc he'd still be an ensign#and he'd be like...what? 60? 70?#80??#I like how long Tuvok and T'Pel seem to have waited to have kids...literal decades and then FOUR !!#anyway#[REDACTED] family shenanigans#tuvok#tuvok art#comix#bee doodles#trans vulcans
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good morning
#yesterday i spent the evening with a friend which is always nice#i rarely go out especially with company :3#the mean girls movie is fun and cute#a lot of those girls had chemistry and need to discover lesbianism#ive been reading htn and struggling w monster baru so i might put that on hold for a bit sorry to my fans#i dont know why book 2 is such a slog rn but i wont abandon it#i was wearing a hoodie for palestine yesterday and a woman asked me where i got it which warmed me#she was with her family and still caught me on her way out#also happy black history month if any of u disagree wt my opinions this month yr racist#anyway im gonna play some games and read to cope with it being sunday#oh i also watched anatomy of a fall the other day its very good!!!
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X has stopped replying to my texts. Did I do something wrong..? I must have. Why can't I be perfect like them.
#they said i looked hot when i wore a shirt blazer and tight pants but i dont really believe it#i dont hate my legs as much nowadays so it was nice to wear smth where i could actually see my quads lol#and they said i looked good in formal wear which. yeah i guess?#doesnt everyone?#and then i asked if they were dating their bsf because the two of them act like an old married couple#and they were like no..?. and were like. well you and i are close like that too. we do a lot of stuff that most people#would consider more than platonic#and i guess yeah. hand holding and the sort. saying that i look hot when i dress up or staring at my thighs lol#but i told them that. that doesnt count. they probably tell a lot of ppl that they look hot#i know i do#idk..#it's just that i wish i were like them. i wish i passed better as a boy than a girl#i wish i had such a certain future. i wish i was even a fraction of how cool they are.#goddamn i hate myself.#and when they say i look good. or that im interesting. from the bottom of my heart. i dont believe a single word.#because how can they look at me in any other way than utter disgust. when theyre so brilliant.#between me and their bsf.#if i were them#i know who I'd choose in a heartbeat#and it's not me.#it's ok...#i understand#but i still wish i were good enough for them
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more fashion dreamer pics! more Dave plus I made my OC Meena (that one of many OCs i made off a dream LOL) as a second muse! i dont have a very close hair colour for her vaguely pinky creamsicle colour i usually paint her with rn so she just has fully pink hair for the time being jhkfldskjrf also raven showed up at my showroom! and some isaac fits because they say shit like %#^[#!{%#% so i always wanna talk to them LOL
can u tell "flirty" was my favourite style in style savvy DS vhjbelkfrfe
#fashion dreamer#the very first game the original DS game. i miss u flirty. i know it got like#divested into mostly bold and a bit of girly and pop#irl i think its supposed to be inspired by like gyaru-ish stuff and a lot of general 2000s hot pink shenanigans#looks like jirei kei but more tube tops and fur and a more saturated pink LOL#it was a bit redundant of a style so it makes sense they got rid of it after the first game#but listen. black and hot pink and bows and lace. i just love it HJKDLSJFKDS#attempting to single handedly make as much flirty esque clothes as i can now#thats one thing thats nice about the clothing making aspect of this game. its a bit more limited than i would like rn#but now i can make ALL the flirty style. i can even make type b flirty.... im unstoppable#like everyone else i expected but am still a bit bummed by the genderlocking in this game#i expected the clothes but the socks and shoes being locked is a bit of a killer sometimes..#i want type a's in dress shoes and type b's in heels is that so much to ask#also i want fishnets for type b so so desperately#let dave wear fishnets. please#what was a bit of a shock tho was the npc poses u unlock are also type a or b only#which SUCKS because NOW type a's cant look half asleep like sleep deprived simon#and type b's cant do a tadaaa pose like woodland whateverhernamewas#its so sad because my oc dave would be perfect for the tadah! and my oc meena would be perfect for the half asleep#THAT i hope they update especially cause like yeah u need to alter things for the different rigs but its an animation man#pwease. pwetty pwease i want those poses to be universal ;-;#still playing like daily tho LOL intensely addicting gameplay despite the many flaws
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paper bag by fiona apple playing while I'm in urban outfitters <333 trying and failing to find a cute dress that will fit me <33333 they really want me to kill myself :)
#it was actually the other day but i saved this to my drafts but now im ready to complain so#vent in tags ->#i have to dind a dress to wear to my uncles wedding and i cannot find a single nice plus size dress anywhere#and i hate being fat#im very much trying to turn a new leaf and be a little more body positive and such#but!!!!!!#i can't <3#i spent yearsssss of my life obsessing over my weight tho and it got me nowhere i just gained and lost the same 50lbs for the whole of my#teenage years#and i have to be kinder to myself#and yes i am still actively trying to lose wight but!!!!#i am trying to be less of a yoyo dieter and really try to get away from binge eating and all of my other#really disordered eating habits#i just wanna eat like a normal person#exercise like a normal person and have my body reflect that#and i wanna be able to find a cute little dress in a shop :(#it is so humiliating to be fat#and i have lost weight#which is nice anc i got a lot of comments on it at first#which was not as nice cuz all i heard was#YOU WERE FAT AND WE ALLL FUCKING NOTICED#so <33333#idk i just feel like shit :)#weight loss tw#tw ed
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My therapist asked if I dressed ironically and I had to assure him that no, I just really like florals
#he said I wear a lot of flowery clothes and ‘funny shirts’#which I mean I don’t even wear a ton of florals. just like a flowery shirt or pair of pants#but I mean… plants look nice. flowers look nice. flowers… pretty#and ‘funny shirts’??? that just hurts#I’ve only worn band shirt and dress shirts. today was a kind of cute Godzilla shirt but I’m not doing it to be ironic#I’m too old to like things ironically#just let me be cringe with sincerity#tbf I’d just told him I’d been goth in high school and I guess he thought that carried over and was me trying to get people’s attention#and I mean I guess a lot of people pick their outfits with some idea of public perception in mind#so I don’t think it’s unreasonable to imagine how others would perceive me#but I dress like a boring dad a lot of the time. not anything exciting#I swear I’m still goth inside. I promise I’m still a spooky boy. but the kind of spooky boy that wears shorts w/ the occasional polo shirt🤷🏻#oh god… I’m a sellout 😣#we were talking about how self conscious I am and how I hate possibly being viewed as this big grumpy looking dude#but whatever we’ve all got problems pppssssshawwww#and I dunno… this is too much talking for a dumb text post#whoops#you can ignore this#text
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y'all i have created a Monster 😮😳😳
#sriracha.txt#long post#i found a grey hair mod and. well.#i always knew she'd be at her most powerful when she was graying but i didn't expect to be so RIGHT#i was going to give up the sims 4 but now i must go cc hunting to attempt to make her outfit in 5 proper#i like to imagine she has this stupidly big square leather duster.. nero's got the short coat in 5 so Somebody has to hold down the front o#ridiculously long coats! anyways it's not even her coat - thus explaining the size - but like one of the staff's communal freezer coats#in my head it's this really nice like.. daark eggplant that almost looks brown but It's Ourple Ur Honor#and ofc she has the vermilion/orange/?? skirt 😤 which is funny because now that i'm thinking about it#her color scheme is saur spardalike. make of this what you will but i will be pretending it's on purpose :3c#anyways her outfits during 5 are really fun to think about because they're just a mishmash. her design is on the downwards slope from being#Ultra Polished to whatever is in arms reach... there's no time to think about what to wear when you've got a whole island to defend from#demons solo! (but. because her outfits were so polished before. there is still the swag throughout her fits because she's cycling through#her old clothes yk 🍻 nero's design undergoes a pretty big shift between 4 and 5 that communicates a Lot about fortuna to me so I want her#design to reflect that culture shift while bridging the Then and the Now#my one thing w the design here is that. i think the coat might be a little too v-esque which. on one hand is funny. on the other hand she#and v do the venn diagram chacha a little too often + idk if i want to invoke that here. so while i will die fighting for the freezer coat#design i'm also entertaining the thought that this mf is just fighting for her life in her house robe because she woke up and the neighbor'#roof was on fire and there was no time to really get ready.. this is like 5's version of a frying pan being one of her weapons in 4 simply#because she had it on hand when the shit hit the fan.. she is always in situations with no prep time </3#oh! another thing while i'm spitballing design stuff for her.. i decided she'd have a forearm tattoo#to cover up the scar from the brand.. i wanted it to have a lot of meaning to her so i've yet to sit down and figure out#What it is but. that's going on now 🍻 this is as important to her design as The Earrings so. despite being another part of the v-gioia venn#diagram chacha i Cannot take it back lol <3 unless i decide on something else with the ritual but 🕴it is unlikely#anyways i Have To Go to Bed bc i'm practicing driving later so!! farewell comrades lol!#nero prime
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2 weeks into my new job and it's already driving me absolutely stir crazy but my adachi jacket arrived today and everything is alright (for the moment)
#as much as i love the work my colleagues are doing & wish i had them when i was in school#i can tell already i'm definitely not going to get any happier in this role and i probably shouldn't be pretending everything is fine lol#(which applies to a lot of aspects of my life right now frankly)#it's just the telling people and doing something about it part that's difficult.#especially when your boss has been waiting for you to start since september#haha...#anyway this jacket is actually really warm? i thought i'd have problems wearing it through winter but it's way thicker than my army jacket#and i still have my green parka (ha) for the really cold days#very happy with this it feels like shitscram came early#well that's your... uh... periodic life update#i don't like to get too personal here but it's nice to have something good happen for once yknow#me
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also i got lots and lots of compliments on my outfit today and they were able to fix my necklace! i only wanted the big knot out but they fixed the other ones for me too and even cleaned it and for some reason they didn’t even charge me !! and i got my book ! yayyy
#successful day 😎👍🏻#also the part for my car arrived..now i just have 2 wait on my f*ther to replace it for me..#anyways#i didn’t even wanna get up out of bed today but i had to cause i had therapy and u know what#i ended up having a pretty good day -w-#i didn’t get to talk 2 the cute barista at starbucks but..whatever#but! i did end up dressing up a little and i felt so cute today and got lots of compliments which was nice#and i got all my shopping done and had fun..#im still surprised they fixed and cleaned my necklace and didn’t charge me..#i asked abt it and the guy said not to worry abt it and to just come back again sometime *wink*#and i said okay :D and left and then tripped on the curb outside when i was leaving#i’m not exactly in the market for fine jewelry and hopefully my necklace won’t implode on itself again at least for a while so..i probably#will not be going back anytime soon#i did kinda wanna ask if i could have like my ring size measured but i was too shy to ask#the guy behind the counter was kinda cute and very nice and i didn’t wanna bug him so i just sat and waited for my necklace ;-;#i don’t even wear rings im just curious#uhmm. what else. i got some ingredients to make cookies tonight :3#it was nice to have a good day for once -w- i just hope this isn’t a bad omen that things are about to get super fucked#im not trying to be negative!! but it is a genuine pattern in my life that whenever i have a good day or things go well for a bit#that means something disastrous is looming around the corner#i guess we’ll see :’)#snow.txt
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struggling very hard to feel connected to my femme identity and feeling big grief about that
#like idk#theres so many complex feelings and shit involved#but like i cannot deny that the femme community by and large equating the femme experience and struggle#to that of someone who is thin and on some level attractive is really fucking w me mentally#cause its like when there's femme positivity in general i cant relate#cause when its general femme positivity it focuses on validating queerness - but mine is never invalidated because ive always been Other#when its fat femme positivity its usually describing someone with a body still smaller than mine or only talks about rolls and tummies bein#good and often times the default in those is WHITE fat femmes#general positivity for femmes of color feels nice tbh#but even then i dont feel femme enough because femmes are always talking about being hyperfeminine and subverting femininity#and as someone who has never really quite fit in any manner hyperfemininity for me ends up being simply just wearing a dress#the amount of vitriol i get for just wearing a dress#hell even just a skirt#idk there's so much wrapped into these feelings and it feels liek the only ppl who ever understand are fat brown femmes who were also#masculinized/othered from the start and remain othered for the most part#which is such a small fraction of ppl ive met irl bc a lot of ppl like me usually just hide#and i get it#i do it too#its just hard to connect sometimes because i Know im femme but when the acknowledgement of femme existence centers mostly on the femmes who#are closest to the default......
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...
#looking at the notes ppl in the lab let me on my birthday card. it seems ppl think i should chill the fuck out lmao#a lot were like RELAX!!! and ya kno objectively theyre right but i refuse to listen bc theres something wrong in my head#sigh. i survived the day at least. the timed measurements r done on this experiment. thank christ. and my birthday gathering as so#i dont kno. it was kinda funny and kinda sad i guess. bc i knew it was gonna happen and i didnt want it to but i was like fine. ill meet#at 4. and i expected it to b in the conference room but they set up outside the lab around the corner. so they did kinda surprise me#location wise i guess. i cant imagine what expression i was making. it felt like a pained smile but idk. i had to go back to take#measurements every 4min so i was standing there with a plate full of ice creame cake. kinda away from everyone while they talked. staring#at my phone timer as it ticked down and abruptly leaving when i had to log a measurement. i was basically a non entity while there. which#was kinda idea bc i have too much hurt inside to talk to ppl right now. as evidence by my phone call with my parents when i got home. im#just kinda a bummer to exist around rn. idk maybe i should apologize to my boss bc i kno im not an easy person to do things for#and i really do appreciate the effort. its just hard when i kno how much stress its going to cause me for someone to attempt to do#something they think will b nice. so idk i just feel bad. but its over. and idk what ill do tomorrow. i should do stuff for when i move#like my dad was like: u should prioritize ur future stuff. and hes objectively right. they think i should get a studio apartment which#would b expensive as fuck but i will destroy myself if i have roommates. idk. theres lots still to do bc i have to get a ton of data#processed by the end of the week bc i have 8 days of measurement on another project that needs to get done by may 14th when i leave for#vacation. which my mom was like did u buy ur tickets for next month and i was like. hm how do i ask where im supposed to buy tickets to#without giving away that i dont kno what ur talking abt? bc apparently im going to a wedding? wtf do i wear to a wedding?#idk. i guess im just kinda sad bc this month has been really hard. i made it hard for no reason bc theres something wrong in my head and#that hurt has nowhere to go bc i cant even give anyone an honest account of how awful it was bc its like what r they gonna do abt it?#anything i say is just worrying bc i cant seem to stop myself who whats the point in talking abt it. but idk humans r social creatures so#when im in pain at least part of me wants someone to brush my hair and acknowledge my pain and tell me itll b ok#but idk. the idea of that happening is different from the reality where i seem to opperate at a different frequency to other people. we#just dont seem to properly connect. idk. idk what ill do tomorrow. im afraid to loosen my grip on my schedule bc i might fall to piece#pieces without the pressure. well see. lets home my 26th year is better than my 25th was. bc last year sucked#hope* lets hope that was my low point. bc that was not a fun time and im worry to take account of thr damage done#unrelated
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hav used my birthday money 2 buy clothig :)
#+ leftover christmas money#i have bought a nice long maxi dress in a burnt orange that i will be able to wear in winter and summer :D!!#last one in my size as well i thought i was gonna have 2 pay full price but then it turned out it was half off#and then i got 2 long sleeve knits/tops one is ribbed and cream coloured the other is a turtleneck and dark green#which will look great with the dress#and then finally i got this super cute pale blue thick knit becuse ive needed more now autumn/winter is here#and i want to branch out into light blues/pinks more i look pretty in those colours#dark greens all oranges all browns warm yellows and light pink + blue are my colours#unfortunately reds are very much NOT i look blotchy in them. and any purples are a no go as well + lots of jewel tones#ironically the colours i dont look good in/styles i like but dont suit as much are the ones my best friend looks great in#i.e the black friday stuff at dangerfield the dark gothy stuff the punk stuff etc#i look good in blouses tho just wish they were better suited to having massive tits. because that is a burden that makes them less viable#rip that pretty white frilly button up i almost got my bust was too strong#OH i also used that makeup giftcard to get some new powder for my face and i STILL HAVE MONEY LEFTOVER ON IT#plus i got a bday gift no idea what it is but it looks perfume shaped (?)#im just so glad that with every 3-4 months i go out to get clothes i get a better grip on my style#lets me go back through my other stuff which i like but werent exactly me/never made me look the way i wanted#now i can either sell/donate them to someone who will enjoy them#like that holographic purple shirt i got and those overalls#that i got before i realise if i ever want to wear overalls/dungarees#i will have to make them myself because they are NOT made for hourglass figure tall ppl#they are made for sticks and they WILL bunch around your crotch and be annoying as hell
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Last time I went to my dentist appointment the dentist called my teeth boring and the hygienist agreed and said it was nice to look at boring teeth for a change
This time around, the dentist (a second one, the first's husband) said everything was looking good and then paused a moment and asked if he could take a photo of them. He said they look very nice and he'd like to use them as references for people who need cosmetic procedures
And so I've been incredibly pleased today to see that I'm getting a good grade in teeth
#ive had issues keeping up with then when i was younger#depression and etc and all that#but my mom was a dental assistant so i had regular cleanings and check ups#so theyve been monitored but i still like have to do most the work or whatever#my gums have been having issues and still are but the hygienist mentioned theyre looking a lot better than they had been#so not only was it pleasing to hear that my teeth look nice it was pleasing to heat someone notice what i was doing and it was improvement#the braces i had in middle/high school paid off i guess#i stopped wearing my retainer ages ago but the only shift in my teeth ive noticed are a small shift on the bottom#which the retainer wouldnt help anyways and if its not causing a health issue i dont see a need to fix it#but yeah its just exicting to tell my mom how i have boring teeth lmao#dont mind me#tag rambles
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