#while you simultaneously make justifications for yourself

[qoldenskies]

cc!leo and the way love and distrust go hand in hand for him. how he guards his own heart in an attempt to protect the person he cares about the most and that's his own undoing-- how that's both of their undoing. how he sees trust on donnie's end as too much, something he doesn't deserve and something he took for granted. how out of everything that's the one thing he will never ask for, and he's so quick to withhold information to protect donnie's heart in turn (hell, he does it to raph too, and by taking leadership he's quicker to hold up the weight on his own instead of sharing it).

and how this contrasts with how leo before this point spent his whole life begging for the trust of others, for his family to just believe in him for once. and now he fails to see the independence he's developed as a sign that his trust in other people, and in donnie, has been broken, and because of that he doesn't realize that it hurts them until he has to confront it violently head-on. (he doesn't even realize that in a lot of ways its the other side of the coin from how he was under the curse)

it is almost one am. ummmmmmm

[etrosgate]

i was brainstorming alternate ways to port 999, and while the obvious way is to just make it swap between full screen text box and dialogue boxes (like 90% of normal visual novels do. including vlr) but idk, it kinda loses some of that ludo-narrative juice that just cannot be divorced from the original 2 screen format.

so i kinda fell in love with the concept of a classic pc adventure game presentation, a format where it's completely natural to have multiple windows on screen in a cool frame (and you don't have to mess with the aspect ratios of the artwork. but that might be my bias against widescreen talking lmaoo)

and so i've been putting simultaneously too much and not enough effort into making a mock-up

if it wasn't obvious, this is taking heavy inspiration from the save menu screen design.

the dialogue box would be a pop-up window so you'd get to see this design down there sometimes (my justification for putting in the effort of drawing it)

for the final puzzle, i imagine the two main screens popping out and swapping places (or giving you a prompt to swap them yourself, either with a button or maybe drag and drop?)

i haven't quite decided what to do with the upper right area... i could put the adv puzzle controls there but that might be too cluttered, so im thinking maybe there's just like a cool aesthetic detail up there?

my friends just suggested putting the inventory there, or some sort of timer/clock that shows how many hours there are left, much to think about...

[takeariskao3]

written for #severalsunlitdaylights & @corneliaavenue-ao3!! day 1: taylor swift (debut)

Harry had no idea how he let himself end up in this very specific nightmare of a situation. The last thing he wanted was for Ginny’s arm to be draped around his neck as he half-walked, half-carried her back to her flat on the other side of campus.

His only justification, was that Ron had been otherwise occupied by a some girl he knew from class. While he'd been snogging her in the corner, Harry had to watch as Ginny nearly fell off of her chair attempting to out drink some footballer, who had eighty pounds and a full twelve inches on her. After that his path forward seemed pretty clear. Despite his aversion to it.

So, there he was, traipsing across the quad with the barely conscious object of his infernal infatuation tripping along beside him.

"Any particular reason," he began lightly, ignoring the way her head rested against his shoulder, "tonight was the night you decided to drink yourself to death?"

She sighed and stumbled over her toes. "Jusabitofun..."

"Oh, yeah?" Harry adjusted his grip around her waist. "Face down in a toilet is fun for you?"

"Plesss," she slurred. "I haven't been pissed sick since '96."

"And how long have you been speaking in couplets?"

She cackled, and the sound echoed off the stone buildings on either side of them. "You think you're so funny."

"No," Harry replied. "Just sober."

Ginny booed, loudly, and he had to clap a hand over her mouth to keep her outburst from waking up the entire fucking city. In his effort to keep her quiet, he pulled to a stop and they now stood in the damp yellow light of street lamp, two blocks from their destination.

"Christ, Ginny," he cursed. "What's gotten into you?"

She stared up at him and mumbled something behind his palm. He hoped she was inebriated enough that she didn't notice the way his breath caught the longer their gazes held.

Harry dropped his hand. "What was that?"

"I ditched Dean tonight."

His stomach did a violent swoop through his middle and Harry swallowed down the sudden tightness in the back of his throat.

"Why?"

Ginny shrugged, her eyes darting away from his face and into the middle distance. "Never felt right. Not all the way, at least. Not like it's supposed to."

Harry didn't really have a response to this, but he couldn't look away from her either. In an instant, her carefree and impetuous demeanor was shadowed by a profound misery.

Then he realized he was staring, so he cleared his throat and skirted his glance away.

"He's a good bloke, Dean," she continued absentmindedly, as Harry led her into a few measured steps down the sidewalk. "But I never felt like I was all the way myself with him. I wasn't ever just... me. D'ya know what I mean?"

"M-Maybe," he stammered. "Er–Sure..."

Snorting, Ginny placed her hand over where his palm rest against her ribs. "And when do you feel most like yourself?"

When I'm with you.

"I dunno," he said instead, fundamentally mortified by the gut reply that had almost clawed its way out at her question.

"I think it's when I'm on the pitch," she hummed, her eyes dropping shut as they meandered ever closer to Cairncross.

Harry didn't have a response to this, or at least, he kept his mouth firmly shut for fear of what he might blurt out if he didn't.

Eventually, they approached Ginny's building. He simultaneously felt bereft and relieved as she shuffled out of his grasp and up her front steps. She pressed incessantly at her and Hermione's buzzer until the door hummed and the lock clicked.

"Thanks for walking me," she hummed, holding the door open and staring down at him with a soft smile.

Harry smirked back. "Think you'll make it up the stairs?"

"Only one way to find out." With one last grin, she turned on her heel and let the door begin to shut behind her.

Harry had a split second to make his decision, and impulse won as her earlier explanation pounded out a rhythm in the base of his skull.

I ditched Dean. I ditched Dean. I ditched Dean.

"Hey, Ginny!" he called, only a few inches of space left before the door could close all the way.

She reappeared, the light of the hall spilling out behind her.

Harry stood dumbstruck and silent as she watched him in mild curiosity.

"I–" he struggled uselessly. "I'm–"

"No, wait–" she interjected, her eyes wide and the quirk to her lips expectant. He couldn't quite explain it in the moment, but the expression on her face told him, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that she knew exactly what he'd been about to say. "Will you do me a favor?"

Harry's exhale shuddered on its way out. "Sure?"

Ginny beamed at him, and he felt it like a lance of sunlight straight through his sternum. "Tell me tomorrow?"

Something inside his chest cracked open; soaring, galloping hope seared its way through his blood stream.

She tilted her head to the side, resting it against the door jamb. "Because I want to remember this."

"Yeah, okay. Tomorrow."

Harry chuckled as she disappeared back inside, contemplating what exactly defined tomorrow, and if it would hurt his chances if he showed up on her doorstep sometime around sun-up.

Probably. But Harry figured if he brought along a bag of pastries, that just might make up for it.

[katherinakaina]

Sadly, this is your worst video, @theabigailthorn . You spend more and more time promoting your other projects, instead of providing the substance for your videos. And it really hurts the quality of Philosophy Tube.

Here you raise an extremely important topic. And yet, instead of thorough philosophical examination, you uncritically accept one perspective on it, to the point where you just give the speaker to its proponent. And then you switch to talk about the societal and political issues, without even noticing that the death acceptance narrative completely undermines them.

Yes, human condition is simultaneously being the super special and unique spark of consciousness, capable of love, reason and art but also being a bunch of matter which is potentially just food for worms. And yes it's unpleasant to think about it for obvious reasons and therefore people usually don't, which often leads to bad consequences. But if you solve this cognitive dissonance by persuading yourself that death is good actually, and that you, and everyone else are not special or particularly valuable, then why would anyone care about the children of Gaza? After all they are also just food for worms, are they not?

The equilibrium of death acceptance, where everyone can look in the face of death due to not considering it bad anymore, isn't a world without horrors of war. It's a world where people do not even need to justify these horrors, where consideration of casualties doesn't even come to mind. It's a world where NO life is grievable at all! You've noticed yourself that trying to adopt this philosophy made you more callous. Now try honestly imagining what would it do to society as a whole, if everyone adopted it.

The reason why we do not even want to think about death, the reason why we are so shocked when an alligator ignores our natural rights is because death is REALLY FUCKING BAD. It's one of the worst thing there is, and it happens to everybody, and you can do very little about it. This is the horrible truth of human condition which you are not properly facing as long as you try to delude yourself into death acceptance.

Were you under impression that it's just such an obvious and therefore boring point? Is that why you managed to make an entire video about death without talking about immortalism? Well, if you thought about it at all, you might've noticed a lot of interesting implications connected to the societal issues you are concerned with. Like how modern society just assumes that lives of the elderly are not worth grieving, how it's just assumed that death of "natural causes" is somehow fine. How worries about existential risks and long term consequences of human activities, such as global warming, naturally much less consider people, who do not expect to witness them. How whole conservative ideology is based around human mortality. How obsession over fertility, enforcement of gender roles and treating women as walking wombs stop having ANY justification whatsoever when there is no need to constantly replenish the dying population. How people in their eighties would be much less motivated to shift into conservatism without age related cognitive decline and if more than half of their life would still be in front of them.

Humbleness is part of the answer. You do need to be humble enough to understand, that its not that likely that you in particular will witness the glorious transhumanist future where people do not have to die anymore, and still fight for this future for the sake of others. Being a soldier who will very likely die doesn't mean you can't still wish for victory.

But humbleness is never the whole answer. Imagine treating any other significant problem that humanity struggles with, like this video proposes to treat death. Imagine someone claiming that sexism is just natural state of affairs and we need to humbly accept this part of our existence, or even embrace it with ~curiosity~, while mocking every attempt to solve the issue as corporate HR culture, virtue signaling or wishful thinking. Isn't it immediately obvious how intellectually bankrupt this reasoning is? Then why do you suddenly treat the exact same approach as insightful in this case?

[ashirisu]

i admittedly loved girl dinner and girl math when they first started trending bc they felt so fun and positively commiserating to me. girl dinner reframed negative self-talk around food into a group of friends giggling about how actually their lazy, no-spoons meals were kinda like a poor woman’s charcuterie board if looked at in the right light, and girl math brought a “treat yourself” mindset to the backward, jumping-through-hoops justifications we often do to convince ourselves that we are in fact deserving of nice things that make us happy.

the problem is that, even if these interpretations had been clearly and explicitly stated from the beginning (which they weren’t), control of the narrative was lost the literal second the trend broke containment. misogyny is so inherent to society that you can’t even tack the word “girl” onto concepts and trends made by girls, for girls because once the gender essentialists get whiff of it, it’s over. men start using it to belittle women, women start using it to belittle women, terfs start using it to exclude trans women while simultaneously belittling cis women, spin-offs and bastardizations start popping up to further reinforce the binary gender divide, and what started as a fun way to connect with other women and girls about the ways you playfully defy society’s expectations that you constantly be pretty and healthy and thin and fiscally responsible and good at cooking and the perfect budgeter and homemaker is suddenly being used against you to remind you that, to them, your personality should only ever amount to eating disorders and shopping.

“i’m just a girl” and whatever is going on with the pink collar jobs trend (supposedly, i’m not on tiktok anymore so i haven’t seen it firsthand) started a lot closer to the negative end of this spectrum for obvious reasons, and hearing that it’s apparently still going strong makes me fucking uncomfortable for what i hope are also obvious reasons.

but at the same time i do lament the loss of safe places to laugh about the ways we as girls and women cope with the weight of patriarchal expectations without those jokes being ripped away from us, broken in half and pasted back together the wrong way around, and handed back to us with a little note that says no, being a woman means being miserable. never forget that you are stupid and lesser. you will be happy with the role you’re given, and if you ever make a joke about your experience with your gender again, you better make sure it’s at your own expense.

You can be talking to someone and she'll be like, "Oh I made a silly mistake. Women don't deserve voting rights teehee." And you'll be like, "What." And she'll be like, "Oh I'm sorry! That must sound so bad out of context. No it's this Tiktok meme where, if you're a girl and you do something dumb, you say 'Women don't deserve voting rights teehee.'"

And you'll be like, "That sounds bad." And she'll be like, "No no. It's totally not that bad. It's just a meme. Men say it too. Like if a man does something silly he'll be like, 'I am like those women who do not deserve to vote.'" And you'll be like, "Does that make it better?" And she'll be like, "Well there was one guy who tried to make 'Men shouldn't vote' a popular meme. But it never caught on and also he got yelled at a lot."

And then you drop it there because like, you're harshing the vibe.

[the-eternal-quest-for-balance]

PAY ATTENTION OR PAY THE PRICE.

Kyle Creek, aka "The Captain"

Monday Mutiny | 2.26.2024

Years ago, I used to post on social media every day—oftentimes, multiple times a day. It was a vital part of my morning routine: shit, shower, say something smart.

In the beginning, social media was just as entertaining as it was validating. It was fun, creative, and occasionally challenging. I enjoyed the new outlet for writing and observation. But, eventually, social media became a serious distraction. Instagram and Twitter were no longer outlets to use in addition to what I was creating in the real world—they became the very reason for creating—and, subsequently, the writing that I was doing online became justification for putting off the other projects and tasks that I had in my mind.

Sound familiar?

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As Instagram and Twitter sucked up more and more of my time, as I gained more and more attention for my writing online, I found myself thinking more and more about all of the books that I was going to write, all of the goals that I was going to accomplish, and all of the things that I was going to create—while simultaneously spending less and less time actually working on them.

Again, does this sound familiar?

Looking back, the amount of time that I’ve spent on social media over the past ten years has never been proportionate to what I’ve received in return from it: fulfillment, inspiration, income, etc. And now, when I reflect on what I’ve accomplished with my life over that same time period, I regret giving so much of my attention to social media. Because all of that attention could have been used to create something much more significant. Something more meaningful, more powerful, and ultimately, more satisfying. All of the books that remain unwritten, all of the goals that remain unattained, and all of the ideas that remain unimagined—it’s all my fault that they remain that way because of where I’ve chosen to give, and spend, my attention.

Wherever your attention goes, so does your future self.

In 2019, the company LEGO® conducted a study to answer the age-old question:

“What do you want to be when you grow up?”

And the number-one career aspiration among eight- to twelve-year-olds living in the United States and the United Kingdom: YouTuber.

Now, why is that?

Well, I’m willing to bet it’s because YouTube is where those kids are placing most of their attention. And, chances are, they are not focusing their attention on becoming a YouTuber themselves so much as they are simply giving their attention to YouTubers.

Granted, they’re kids and it’s hard to explain the difference to them—but we’re all adults here—and it should be easy for us to know whether our attention is being focused or wasted.

If time is money, then attention is the currency with which you pay.

And, believe me, someone is always getting paid.

The truth is: your attention is going to make somebody else rich. In fact, it already is. Who is benefiting from you watching reels, thumbing through TikToks, or scrolling aimlessly to find yet another distraction for the day?

There’s a reason why every tech company is trying to develop the next app, game, tool, or device to take your attention away from you. The future is not going to be built by those with the most money, it’s going to be built by those who command—and control—the most attention.

Your attention can either set you apart—or be the very reason why you never even start.

In this day and age, the ability to harness your own attention is a superpower. You can get ahead, free yourself from the herd, and live a life that others can only dream of by simply focusing your attention on your own life and your own creations.

Your life, today, is a reflection of where you placed your attention yesterday.

Your life, as it currently stands, is a direct result of past action and focused or unfocused attention. (Sure, shit happens, and there is often much in life that is out of our control, but you know what I mean.)

Moving forward, if you spend the majority of your days scrolling, you will continue doing so until the day comes that you finally realize (with regret) that you missed out on a lot of living. But, if you choose to spend the majority of your days creating, working, or building something in the real world—I promise you—you will eventually create or build something that not only attracts the attention of others, but naturally draws your own attention in because you are provided with real fulfillment (not the cursory hits of dopamine that come from riding social media’s carousel).

Likewise, if you continue giving all of your attention to the bad shit that is happening, you will continue to only see and experience bad shit. But, if you choose to focus your attention on improving the bad around you, you will inevitably create/find a lot of good.

Now, I’m not a fool, I’m not a cynic, and I’m certainly not ungrateful for the attention that I’ve received from you and others. For someone in my position, social media has been a double-edged sword, a necessary evil, and at times, a genuine benefit. I’m also very aware that what I’ve written today—and everything else that I’ve written over the years (both on and off of social media)—has asked of your attention. And, I thank you for giving it to me. In fact, the primary reason why I have never once posted a sponsored ad, taken money from an advertiser in exchange for a feature, or promoted anything that I didn’t personally create is because I appreciate your support, and I value your attention.

As for this piece, I hope you come to realize that your attention is your most valuable asset in life. And I hope you choose to spend it wisely.

From personal experience, the wisest way to spend it is in the real world, an area where ideas can have a lasting impact rather than the transience of an ever-shortening attention span. Build something for yourself. Focus on those around you whom you love and appreciate. Free yourself from repetitive patterns and redundant behaviors. Put your own goals on the forefront of your mind and allow yourself to be the recipient of the majority of your time. Use your attention as a tool for personal growth as opposed to allowing it to become somebody else’s means of control.

Again, thank you for giving me your time and attention.

Thank you for reading and subscribing,

-Kyle, aka “The Capt.”

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[russenoire]

some points raised by AI advocates that made me stroke my chin and maybe even empathize a tiny bit.

idk, but i like nuance and think it gets elided easily in online discussions. i do not think these below are GOOD justifications, ever, for plundering the hard work and talent of human artists using AI to make art for profit, but they're valid points.

some people tempted by or who make AI art

don't want to take the time to 'git gud, n00b' because they emphatically do not enjoy the process of sucking at shit until they don't suck. and this includes those who might be interested in taking the time, but look at everything they feel might be required and think: 'i could go to film or art school for 3+ years or i could spend 30 minutes tailoring a midjourney prompt.' i kinda get this one, tbh. artistic skill is hard-won whether you're formally trained or not. i am untrained; i would say self-trained. but i never stopped drawing as a child like most people do. something visually and mentally clicked for me, something that i couldn't even articulate until i read drawing on the right side of the brain in my 20s, that allowed me to jump over the initial 'why can't i just draw what i SEE AAAAKSHDKF' hurdle. maybe this is what 'talent' actually means? that early mental/visual shift—where you come to see the world and things in it as a collection of shapes, lines, planes, lights, darks, color blocks, mostly divorced from context or meaning—is present in others like myself, and it does smooth your path. adults just draw for two, three, four years, compare themselves to people who felt some version of that aforementioned shift and/or went to art school, and conclude that they 'have no talent'. while that understandably feels like a long-ass time to go nowhere fast, three years really isn't a lot of time for organic, undirected skill development. i'm serious. inventing the wheel by yourself takes fucking forever; my drawings didn't stop sucking until i was around 11 or 12. that's half my childhood. easily. but actually taking classes or diving into hardcore study? can and will drastically shorten that time. the progress i've seen competent drawing teachers achieve with their students in weeks or months, or artists on youtube who do frequent, deliberate practice in a year is not a miracle. real progress is attainable within a reasonable fucking frame of time IF YOU WANT IT.

really, really aren't satisfied with art that looks bad to them and still want to realize their ideas. and i'm talking crying themselves to sleep over the mismatch between their own skills and said ideas. that frustration is REAL and a version of it is actually a huge factor in why children stop drawing. see all of the above. i don't know how to ease the pain of that skill mismatch. me, i sat with a lot of frustration for a long time; hell, I STILL DO. i think i'd still be halfway decent at lineart and intimidated by actually painting it if i hadn't just started pushing myself to fucking PAINT already, even if it looked really basic. being simultaneously OK with whatever you can do right now and still striving to improve is emotionally difficult. and i know it hurts to have a really cool idea and feel blocked from making it real, especially if you're just not there yet. 'THEN JUST COMMISSION AN ARTIST,' i can hear you artists screaming from the ether. yo. artists are expensive. we are, and we kinda need to be to make a decent living or a feasible side hustle (i'm not going to get into artists underselling themselves). i do think most folks in this boat are not greedy tech bros, just ordinary working class folks who want beauty that is good enough without having to shovel over half a week's paycheck for it. to which i would also argue... dude, you can just save up, too.

often only recognize certain styles of painting (realism or hyperrealism; super-glossy, shiny, high contrast digital painting) as art and want to make art like THAT. putting aside the fact that art is all-encompassing and literally anything can be art, paintings in realistic styles are what i would argue most lay people think of as capital-A art. there is a reason why dictators tend to discourage or prohibit non-realist art; why the early USSR and CPC commissioned bright realist murals everywhere; why more abstract art didn't really catch fire in the western world until the advent of photography. people can see themselves and their history, represented in full color and often writ large. that's fucking powerful and sometimes lost, i think, on those of us who see things differently. but that kind of art is even more out of reach for the lay person who wants it. it takes far longer to make and train for, and artists who work in a realistic style can and do command stupid money. not everyone has that kind of patience or pockets that deep.

firmly believe that some people have more talent than others, so skill development doesn't matter. these are usually the people i mentioned in my first point, who've actually tried for months or years to git gud but never knew how or what to practice. they've been exposed to lots of people their age who felt the shift™ and can't really explain their faster improvement. if you know this feel, gentle reader, and have no clue what's actually happening, i understand why you might throw in the towel. US culture in particular is terrible at growing and nurturing talent of all kinds, and artists don't often share the hours they're actually pouring into improving specific skills. 'talent' by itself is fucking useless; a person who is willing to work at continual improvement will mop up the floor with someone who doesn't think they need to build skill. artists know this. and if you don't feel that shift as a kid, you can learn how to unlock it as an adult.

[tweeks]

cartman fans remain the worst type of people in this fucking fandom. ALL of them are apologists, no matter how much they pretend they aren't. it's fascinating to me how they can admit he's supposed to be an irredeemable piece of shit, while simultaneously using his age or blaming other characters for HIS bigotry. i'm honestly curious what makes them this way? i need to know what has you resorting to dog whistle language to defend a character you just moments ago said was made to be irredeemable. anyone who has him as a comfort character or say they relate to him is undoubtedly outing themselves as bigots.

hmm well im uncertain if everyone who enjoys cartman is a bigot necessarily like he has his moments for everyone im sure and like i understand seeing cartman and thinking hes funny or interesting or sometimes even seeing yourself in him hes a well written character of course people are allowed to feel deeply about this character its only human but to deny that he’s racist or that hes a bad person or prioritizing the woobification of your favorite character over the feelings of real life people of color who just aren’t that stoked on him is. it is just very telling of your character and where your loyalty lies when i say cartman is terrible im not doing a discredit to his character im stating an Objective Fact? so if you like cartman so much why do you insist on redeeming him or absolving him of guilt he doesn’t have or twisting everything he says into a justification for why he is the way he is cartman is a bad person but hes also? really funny hes mean and insane and self aware why does he have to have a traumatic reasoning that justifies his every action cartman is bad because if he was good his character would serve no purpose if he changed it would have to be an entirely different show focused solely on cartmans internal life a quarter of a century of cartman spewing racist rhetoric isn’t going to go away because you wrote a kyman fix it fic where cartman realizes he has mommy issues and is miraculously no longer antisemitic or an asshole

[here-there-were-dragons]

no, they LOVE hierarchies actually, even when they make them miserable. it's a handy built-in excuse to be cruel and abusive to people without getting in trouble or feeling like bad people for it (it's also a handy justification for the misery it causes in itself-if you believe in a society of masters and slaves, then any suffering this brings you is justified and good actually, because you deserve it for being lower on the totem pole). which is the only thing humans, regardless of neurotype, in my experience, ever really want or care about, because everyone seems to be operating under the fundamental built-in subconscious certainty that if they're not fucking someone else over, then they're the ones GETTING fucked. and this immovable core-deep obsession with hierarchy is just one of the ways that neurotypicals more often express that same underlying desire that humanity all shares.

autistics aren't even immune to hierarchy based thought-not even particularly resistant to it. we just usually have slightly different ways of expressing the same underlying issue, and are usually too iced-out of neurotypical society for either side to get much chance to see the similarity. in my experience, tending to lean harder on informal power and unspoken systems of shame, purity, and vying for social brownie points where the name of the game is convincing even yourself that that's not why you're doing something. evershifting supposedly-equal but silently popularity-driven systems of mutual omnidirectional cold war where everyone is trying to convince everyone else that they're better and other people are worse while simultaneously trying to convince everyone involved including themselves that there's no hierarchy and they're all equal, as they all reach for the same damn iron throne of informal unofficial moral authority in the opinion-sphere, wanting to be the one who gets to drive what opinions everyone is allowed to agree with this week. autistic social groups ABSOLUTELY practice popularity, hierarchy, and icing less popular individuals out for reasons just as arbitrary and petty as the ones neurotypicals use to exclude eachother, the systems of abuse and dominance more typically favored by autistic-leaning people aren't not there just because they don't map easily onto usually-favored-by-neurotypicals ones. people just don't recognize the same patterns in us because they're so thoroughly programmed to not really view us as people or as fully aware and sapient, so everything we do, even when easily recognizable and relatable to them, even when it's literally the exact same shitty fucking thing they do all the damn time, is simply overlooked as inexplicable and less sentient, cut from a fundamentally alien and inferior cloth.

[ikemenomegas]

oh, just meant your name 'Io'! sorry!

it's just very pretty, i like the mythology and sound of it lol

would any of your naruto! omegas be willing to share their alpha with one of the others, like a triad??

No need to apologize, I just had never heard that term before! Thank you for your kind words. It was a happy coincidence, and I'm lucky it works!

Achievement unlocked anon.... you've found one of my favorite things. Like raindrops on roses etc etc, poly au's make me smile. They usually require situations where things have gone particularly right or things are at least going right enough for a time. I'm also not a big fan of any kind of character vs character outright jealousness, and will preferentially pick a poly au instead.

Unusual pairings that require specific scenarios to come together are fun to do but I suck at coming up with them, so probably people have already done things with the pairings I think of, but that's fine.

(That said! I think you could come up with justifications for any triad you want to, but it always requires trust and communication to work.)

Possible poly ships:

cw: non graphic mentions of sex, polyamory, biology consistent with Kisame being a shark

Itachi x Reader x Shisui

For years I thought these two were cousins, which is a personal squick, but that seems to be more of a Uchiha fam au preference than reality so I could see Itachi being willing to share an Alpha with someone he trusted as much as Shisui. Even if they are willing to share with each other though, there is balance required in this pairing to allow Itachi and Shisui to remain friends. Romantic relationships are all well and good, but isolating yourself from the other people in your life because of them is not so good. Itachi in particular does not need more isolation. Shisui however I don't see as being particularly willing to share with anyone but Itachi and this scenario would happen only if Itachi and his Alpha wanted or needed to pull Shisui in for some reason.

Kakashi x Reader x Iruka

Kakashi seems less the sharing type and is contradictory in his interpersonal relationships. He's possessive and loyal yet detached. He might however get along in a romantic relationship with certain people. He teases Iruka with the aim to fluster but they get along well and Iruka has never been overawed by Kakashi's status or skill level, never afraid to challenge him. Unfortunately, my head is a bit empty about how these three would get together because it sort of needs to happen all at once. Either you and Kakashi start courting first and then add Iruka or somehow Kakashi claims you and Iruka simultaneously and then you and Iruka start courting each other. Kakashi is even more shy in this scenario than when it's just him and Alpha though, feels like he's asking too much of the universe.

Reader x Nagato x Yahiko x Konan

The order of these names is very key here. Through the limitations of not knowing any of the other people around him, and also knowing his friends are the only ones with his full implicit trust, I can only really see Nagato having a polycule in this kind of order. Konan doesn't like him at first the way an Alpha likes and Omega, but she does like to see Yahiko and Nagato happy and would be intrigued at the prospect of them finding pleasure in one another. I think Yahiko might be interested in knowing more about what Nagato sees in his Alpha, and Nagato would enjoy seeing Yahiko engage with his Alpha. Konan is really hot and she and Nagato's Alpha make out at least a few times while Nagato and Yahiko are doing the same. Konan eventually sleeps with Nagato, but it's the last thing that happens. It's nice because it opens opportunities to truly overwhelm him.

Reader x Itachi x Kisame (cw: mentions of eggs)

Another pairing where order matters. Itachi and his Alpha claim each other first, and then Kisame joins. I HC that Kisame's genetics don't align him with the usual a/b/o dynamics. (There's also a nonzero chance of eggs being involved.) Kisame also isn't affected by Itachi's heat the same way, and he doesn't bond the way an Alpha and Omega do. Kisame's instinct is to be a good protector and caretaker for Itachi based on respect alone, but realizing Itachi is capable of certain emotions awakens something in Kisame. He's not good with romantic feelings, doesn't really feel them at all. Itachi is still special though, and once his Alpha wins Kisame's respect from one predator to another, albeit of a different kind, he becomes curious about the different layers to their bond.

[Honorable mentions]

I could see Sai being open to having multiple Alphas, but not having another omega close enough in that way for that kind of triad, mostly because those omegas are already happily with another Alpha

Naruto and Sasuke could absolutely share an Alpha, they've shown their personalities to match in the right way to eventually pull it off.

Gaara and Sasuke might actually be able to share an Alpha, but it would be a more casual relationship where Sasuke is sort of in and out as need be, away for long periods of time

Gaara and Naruto could be able to share an Alpha but it would be a political nightmare

Finally, this is truly a rare pair I'm sure, but I could actually see Haku and Gaara getting along really well, well enough to share an Alpha. Also you get fun little ocean/desert motifs to play with

[userwonu]

i refuse to publish any of these asks from bitchless hao defenders but here’s my (final) take:

there is nobody on this earth who loves and admires someone and simultaneously wants to drop them and lose all or much respect for them. if you admire someone, you want that person to continue to live up to your expectations of what a decent human being is & how they behave. you should recognize that they are human and you do not know them, yes, but at the same time it is reasonable to hold them to basic standards. that is why it is completely unfair to imply that anyone is a fake carat for not defending minghao. because the argument is not that anyone who had any love for him will stand by him and defend him, it is that anyone who loved & cared for him is not looking for an excuse to trash him and remove him from the position they hold him at as someone important to them. that is proof that those who are holding minghao accountable for his hurtful actions and words are not ‘fake carats’ — they are truly brave individuals who recognize that part of loving someone is holding them accountable for their actions. unconditional admiration and loyalty does not reflect love, it reflects unhealthy attachment. being able to say that you love someone but that their actions were completely out of line, being unable to condone them is the right thing to do. that is love. if you love someone, you want them to learn and to do better as a person.

and on the flip side… being able to recognize that while you may have loved someone, the impact of their unsavory actions is far too detrimental for you and that you have to let them go is also an act of extreme and admirable bravery. that may be for the time being, until that person has issued a sincere apology and a promise to change, or it may be permanent. regardless of the decision made, that takes courage and it is cruel to fault someone or imply that the care they previously showed for the person in question was synthetic. nobody deserves the right to freely harm people with their words and suffer no repercussions. and not a soul has the right to make justifications, to call anyone’s hurt feelings into question or to imply that this backlash is superfluous. if you cannot maintain basic human morals because your idols mean too much to you, you need to pull away from this … genre; you need to take some time to become a better person.

lastly, i will say as someone (overweight) who used to bias minghao: i loved minghao. but i love myself more. i am so appreciative to be at a place where i can recognize that and no one can ever take that from me. especially not some person who ‘speaks freely’ at the expense of others, who will never know i exist and will never know that he hurt me. my self love and stability is not worth compromising to remain loyally at his feet in spite of how he feels about me. his claim is that if you love yourself, you will do xyz but the reality is that if you love yourself you will limit any and every thing that causes harm to you and your emotional well-being. keep that in mind. love you all ♡

[supremeinlilac]

Three’s not a crowd, especially when it’s us (4)

Pairing: Cordelia Goode x Reader x Wilhelmina Venable

Word count: 3175

Warnings:  slapping, choking, idk arguing? Brief sexual thoughts.

A/n: I don’t know if this is in character for either of them, but it’s what I felt fit the story so we’re going with it. Also I’ve plotted out the rest of this series and it should be about 10-12 parts long, depending on how much I ramble. Also, I used a line from Apocalypse because I felt like it fit. Anyway enjoy :)

PART ONE | PART 2 | PART 3

“Are you fucking her?”

Cordelia’s questioning was blunt, arms crossed as her gaze flickered between the two of you. You almost laughed at her, but the reflex of defensiveness acted first, and had both Mina and you scoffing at her accusation.

“What?! No” You reacted simultaneously, responses tripping over the other in their haste to deny the claim. Your sincerity doing nothing to quell the fire that seemed to be flickering in the Supreme’s eyes, as if in silent warning. She also was completely disregarding you, directing her question only to her girlfriend.

“Well what is it then? I’m not stupid, I know that something is going on between the two of you.” Her foot tapped impatiently against wood as she waited, an unconscious mirroring of the taps of Wilhemina’s cane.

An uncomfortable silence hung in the air like fog, thick and poisonous and determined to seep into your pores. You could feel it, stinging and burning at your eyes and forcing you to blink away tears. But there was not fog, and the tears were of guilt; overwhelming guilt that had built like rain in a river, threatening to break flood defences and drown you.

You stood rooted, mouth gaping as you tried to stutter out a response, only babbled incoherence falling from your lips. They were too dry, and you noticed so suddenly, supposing your brain was trying to focus on anything but how Cordelia was looking at you. Your tongue darted out to wet them. Wilhemina looked guiltily at the cracked paint at the base of the wall, knuckles white against her cane and you worried the skin might split.

“I lied. I didn’t tell you what my real power was when I came.” Your words died on your lips as you admitted them, until you were barely whispering. You couldn’t meet their eyes. You noticed that on a part of the flooring the planks didn’t fully meet each other, you’d never seen that before.

Wilhemina’s cane cracked against the floor, her head shaking softly at the ground and you wondered why she seemed annoyed. Surely she knew when the game was up, it made no sense to lie further and risk all the relationships you’d built up in your time here. At least it made no sense to you, you already thought that you might love Wilhemina, but it was not justification enough for you to keep up this charade.

Cordelia looked shocked, as if whatever she’d been anticipating you to say had not been that. It wasn’t as if you expected that she knew your secret. You’d been quite careful with your lies throughout your time at the academy. No one could have known.

“You knew?” She turned on Mina, red anger back in her tone and you felt a swell of protectiveness surge within you like a tide. You scurried between them, a barrier, hands up towards Cordelia in mock surrender. You didn’t want Wilhemina to take the fall for your actions. “No, please don’t be upset at her, Cordelia, she only found out last night.”

Your eyes were silent and pleading at the Supreme, who’s gaze was unreadable as she blinked at you. A soft hand fell onto your shoulder from behind and pulled you sideways slightly, out of the middle of the two, so you all were stood equal. A broken sigh left the lips of the woman in lilac, but her hand stayed on your shoulder as she started.

“You don’t need to lie Y/n, it’s okay. Yes Delia, I knew. I found out about 6 weeks ago when-”

While she had been speaking, you’d turned to her, brows furrowed as if to ask what she was doing. Interrupting her when she was about to reveal your power, you both fell into a hushed argument, speaking in words that you both knew would wash over the Supremes head. It was less of an argument per say, more that neither of you wanted the other to burn in the inevitable fire.

Cordelia simply watched your interaction, her own insecurities bubbling to the forefront of her mind. She looked as if she would have preferred that Wilhemina had actually been fucking you, rather than this lie that had spanned over weeks.

Why hadn’t you felt comfortable; safe enough to come to her about it? Why had Wilhemina kept it from her, were they growing apart? She pushed the growing intrusive thoughts down and quashed them like a cigarette under the sole of a boot, as well as the looming voice of her mother, who’d seemed to be making more frequent appearances as of late.

Cordelia cleared her throat.

You were the first to break the silence, holding a hand up when Wilhemina made to protest, silencing the words on lips. “I-urgh-” your hand came to nervously scratch at the nape of your neck, “I used my powers on Ms Venable.”

As annoyed as she was at her girlfriend for her lies, your confession was quick to make Cordelia’s face fall from one of annoyance into worry. A small breathy “what” fell from her mouth as she frowned, turning to Mina, hands coming up to cup her face as she examined her diligently for injury and signs of pain.

Your heart seized painfully when Cordelia paused her examination of Mina to through you a glare over her shoulder. Her eyes were dark. She’d never looked at you like that before. You’d never seen her look at anyone like that. You assumed she thought you were trying to hurt Wilhemina, and maybe part of her would have been right, you hadn’t done it out of kindness.

The law echoed firmly in the back of your head. The punishment for harming a sister witch was to be burnt. You shivered. Technically, Wilhemina was your sister witch now. Stories had told you that in the coven, there was lots of people hurting each other without consequence, but that did nothing to quell the unease that grew in your stomach.

“Darling, I’m fin- I’m fine! Delia, please.”

When Cordelia didn’t cease to stop in her efforts of checking for injury, eyes hardened with the thought of someone hurting the people she loved, Mina brought her fingers slowly to wrap around hers, stilling the frantic movement. She coaxed Delia’s fingers to open before pressing them against her heart.

“See, I’m alright. Y/n didn’t hurt me I promise. Look I’ll show you.” Wilhemina’s voice was soft, thumb brushing over the Supremes’ knuckles.

She stepped away from Cordelia, and you both watched as she extended one of her arms towards the table. You, knowing what was going to happen, swallowed loudly and let your eyes travel to Cordelia.

As the candle lifted from the table, she gasped, looking to you as if she thought you were the one using your powers. Upon finding your eyes already on her, her head whipped back to Mina, who was now ushers it to come to her through the air. “Impossible” Cordelia gasped quietly, on the cusp of her breath, stare locked on the candle.

The candlestick reached Wilhemina’s waiting outstretched hand, and the woman turned back to the both of you, a proud look on her face. If the situation had of been different, you would have given her a thumbs up or expressed verbal praise, but Cordelia’s face was pale and confused so you pursed your lips.

“You’re not a Salem descendant, I’ve never seen anything like this,” Cordelia tried to reason, head shaking as if her logic would somehow reverse the fact that Wilhemina had just telekinetically brought a candle to an awaiting palm.

You stepped towards Cordelia warily, unsure of how to approach telling her without just blurting it out. Wilhemina stepped behind you to replace the candle, she looked smug. You didn’t know how she was handling this admission so well. You were a mess and Cordelia was perplexed. God how you wished you’d never kept it a secret.

“It’s my power,” you tried to explain, voice low. Cordelia looked confused, narrowing her eyes and looking to Wilhemina for an explanation. You started up again before she could answer for you. For some reason you felt the need to be the person telling her.

“I gave Ms Venable magical abilities, and I’m sorry, I just wasn’t thinking because I was mad and I’ve been teaching her and she’s actually really really gifted which I was surprised at, you know seen as it wasn’t by birth. The magic I mean.” You rambled, nervousness making you talkative, trying to defend yourself and Mina before the Supreme had a chance to interject.

It was her hand against your cheek that silenced you, and you heard Wilhemina gasp in shock behind you. Cordelia was trembling, from what you assumed was anger. Why was she so angry, you understood her to an extent, but you weren’t hurting anyone, were you? You tried to keep your eyes locked on hers, but they were too piercing, too extreme; and you had to look away.

Had she always been that tall, or was it her anger that made her seem twice the height, looming and dangerous. The slap had made your head spin, stepping backwards but yet she kept advancing. Your cheek stung but the knowledge that you’d gone enough for her to strike you hurt worse. Cordelia never really even got angry at anyone, she was usually very coolheaded.

“HOW COULD YOU KEEP THIS FROM ME” her voice was sharp, and too loud, and it made your head ache uncomfortably. You were worried the girls may hear. “WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT SECRETS? I NEED TO KNOW WHAT PEOPLES ABILITIES ARE TO KEEP YOU SAFE.”

She was so close you could feel the warmth of her breath on your skin and smell the tang of her perfume, and yet you didn’t think you’ve ever felt further from her. Her chest rose and fell heavily and you slowly looked up at her, stopping at her nose because you couldn’t bare to meet her eyes.

Cordelia’s lip twitched as if she were about to say something else before she quickly turned and stormed out of the room. The door slammed and you flinched, shoulder dropping as you pulled a lip between your teeth.

When you look, Wilhemina’s eyes are on the door. Her head turned and your eyes meet, and she looks, sad? You can’t remember the last time you’d seen Mina look sad and the thought makes your chest ache painfully.

She makes for the door before pausing, hand on the handle. Glancing back at you, it looks as if she’s contemplating staying to comfort you, fighting with her brain about who needed her most in that moment, who she needed more. The glance must have only been momentary, but it felt like minutes, time stretched out and bare before you in your pain. But then the glance was gone, and so was she, the door swinging in her wake.

You were alone. Your shoulders dropped again, although you didn’t remember raising them. Perhaps you subconsciously did at the prospect of Wilhemina staying.

You didn’t feel like raising them again.

***

Wilhemina thought it best to leave Cordelia to allow her anger to thaw, since she’d retreated to the greenhouse. She always liked to be left alone to think when there in the day. She’d listen to Fleetwood mac in the absence of Misty, and let the plants and potions calm her. Maybe she’d smash a couple to defuse, not that she’d ever let anyone know that.

Wilhemina made herself busy in her office, needing anyway to complete the stack of paperwork that she’d allowed to build up in her eagerness to practise and perfect her new magic. It would serve as the distraction she needed to stop herself from seeking out her girlfriend, although it did nothing to clear the image in her head of the hurt on your face when she’d left the room earlier.

She worked until the ink ran out in her pen and the paperwork had been reduced to a minimum. Pushing back from the chair, she gathered the completed paper into an arm, cane in the other. When once she would have struggled to open and close the door without dropping anything, having to rely on Cordelia to get up for her, now the door swung open freely.

Making sure the filing was correct, Wilhemina took the stairs slowly up to her shared room, slowly because the events of the day had taken their toll. She now felt heavy with impending sleep. All she wanted was to have her love in her arms again as they slept.

Thoughts of her girlfriend swirled like mist in her mind, a welcomed distraction as her back started to twinge with pain. Reaching for the handle to their bedroom, she jumped back, clutching at her palm with the other as her cane fell against the dresser. Sucking in a deep breath as her hand began to smart, throbbing in her fingers with a heightened heartbeat.

The door handle had burnt her, it felt like, and now that she bowed slightly to inspect it, she saw how it glowed a warm orange. In fact, the whole door was tinted slightly, not enough for anyone without focused to see, but enough for Mina to know it had a protection spell over it. She’d seen the lesson Cordelia had given in the types of protective spells one could use.

Cordelia had cast a protective spell, the third type from her lesson, she remembered, to stop anyone from getting in, even Mina. Even though she was upset, Wilhemina sighed affectionately. It was so Cordelia to put the least harmful protective spell on the door. Even in her anger, the supreme hadn’t wanted to hurt Wilhemina as she tried to enter, like the other two spells would have.

Wilhemina brought her hands to meet on her stomach, unsure of what to do now she was locked out of her bedroom; all the other witches had returned to theirs, and the house was quiet. She assumed Cordelia would let her in when she went to sleep, wanting to be alone for as long as possible.

After finding her pyjamas and a set of new clothes folded neatly on the chest at the foot of the bed in the spare room, anger flickered in her chest. Surely Cordelia wasn’t expecting she actually slept here. Alone. Turning on her heels, she strode determinedly towards your bedroom.

***

You’d heard stories form the girls when you’d arrived, about when Wilhemina had first arrived in the house years ago. None of them had been there to see it, so the words were mere rumours passed from ear to ear and morphing like the muttered sentences of a child’s game of Chinese whispers.

Some days they seemed ridiculous, the notion that she could have been so carelessly cruel. Today, you believed them. You’d been struck yourself by the unforgiving blade of her tongue.

By the realisation that perhaps you’d been wrong, and that magic wasn’t a thing everyone deserved. Or could be trusted with.

Wilhemina could barely control the fire of her own emotions, never mind the magic you’d trapped her with. She let anger and fear steer her actions and didn’t seem to have the capacity to actually regret them after.

You’d managed to poke a hole through the fragile calm that Cordelia had managed to envelope her in over the years, and you were allowed to see the flickering glimpses of her former self. You let yourself mourn for the person you thought she was.

Perhaps now you knew her, the real her, you may never truly love who she has become. Could you let yourself love someone born from so much spite?

She’d come to your room, eyes hard and angry and hands shaking against her cane. Hissing through bared teeth that you’d ruined everything, among other things that you missed because you couldn’t stop watching how she was shaking.

She’d looked at your blank expression, and how your cheek was still slightly pink, and snapped. Lurching forwards and choking your neck between strong hands. She almost smirked at how your expression changed so suddenly, finger coming to claw at her own, a desperate attempt to get free.

Anger and hurt clouded her mind, just as the thought of Delia earlier, yet this was a thick fog, opaque and suffocating, and stopping her from truly registering what she was doing.

Yesterday you would have become instantly wet and squirmy with the thought of having Wilhemina’s slender fingers wrapped around the delicate skin of your throat. But now, with the black of her eyes holding no kindness as she squeezed harder, making your vision almost blur, you weren’t aroused, All you knew was fear.

In that second, you’d been scared of her. You’d felt it, and so had she.

She’d obviously heard your fear, your pain, because a second later she was stumbling back, cane cracking as it fell to the ground. Her eyes were wide and frightened, as if she couldn’t recognise herself, watching how you held your neck protectively.

You’d watched as she tried to compose herself, smoothing down her skirt with hands that still shook, fingers slightly curling into the fabric. As she stooped to pick up her cane, cracked it twice against the floor and left as if nothing had happened.

You’d seen in her eyes, a silent apology that she always refused to voice, as if breaking some unspoken law she’d set herself. Wilhemina was never in the wrong. Even if she was.

Later, when the moon seemed to be the only witness to your sleeplessness, you let your wind wander, staring at the ceiling. Your covers were drawn up to your chin protectively, as if it would somehow stop the monsters. A childish belief.

In the past 6 hours, you’d been struck by both of the women you’d believed would never raise a hand to you. You wanted to laugh, and cry. Everything was so quick to crumble beneath you, the soil dry and unstable.

This is what Cordelia had meant. Secrets are dangerous. The ground fell away and left you teetering on the edge, so much uncertainty hanging above you. Regret and guilt too.

You supposed it was your own fault, always setting yourself goals that were highly unrealistic and then being surprised when they didn’t work out. You strove for things unattainable and out of reach.

Wilhemina was the moon, dark and cold and misunderstood. She never let anyone see her true self, she was guarded and everyone could only see her through a lens. Everyone except Cordelia.

Cordelia was the sun, she was warm and familiar and the source of things to flourish and grow. Her smile was bright. They were so opposite, but they needed one another, moving in harmony and in sync.

They were both so unreachable but yet, weren’t we told as children to reach for the stars?

PART 5

taglist : @pearplate @billiedeansbottom @pluied-ete @extraordinarilycelestrial @toujours-ensanglante @mssallymckenna @magnificent-paulsonn @shineestark @commanderspeach​@grilledcheeseandguavajelly @darling-dontforgetme @amethyst-bitch @its-soph-xx @germansarechill @bluesxrgnt @d14n4ol @ninaahs @sarahp-stan @natasha-danvers  @imgayandmymomdoesntknow @lovelypeasantjellyfish @rainbow-hedgehog @paulawand  @saucy-sapphic @lilypadscoven @citizenoftheworld-stuff-blog ,if you want to be added just send me an ask :))

[errolsarmpit]

Worried Your Premature Ejaculation Problem is Deteriorating? Use This to Endure Longer in Bed Tonight!

Worried your premature ejaculation problem is placing pointless pressure into your affection life? Assuming you sense your significant other or sweetheart is getting increasingly more frustrated every evening, it is time you take care of business. There are a few straightforward things you can do at home to control your PE inconveniences, help you perform physically better, and simultaneously save this website your relationship from vacillating - and I will show you one simple method you can place into immediate impact tonight!

First thing first... try not to worry yourself to an extreme. Worrying causes uneasiness and stress, and learn to expect the unexpected. Uneasiness and stress makes it all the more simple for a man to fail to keep a grip on himself during sex and permit PE to indulge his evening.

The truth is, premature ejaculation (or PE) can be dealt with, and is not difficult to overcome. Everything necessary is just a few basic procedures to learn to improve your entire sexual experience, and a smidgen of working out to fortify and strengthen the significant ejaculatory muscles.

While this might take you around fourteen days or so to get results, there are a couple "crisis strategies" you can use to more readily control your ejaculation and make sex last longer for both of you!

Ready?

Here's one way: just as you believe you are going to ejaculate, contact the tip of your tongue onto the top of your mouth and move it in a round movement.

That is all there is to it! In all honesty, this basic method can help keep you from shooting off your heap too soon during sex, and make you happen for a more extended period!

Yet, why and how can it work?

Certain individuals accept thusly, you really occupy your psyche from the energy in your private parts while you enter her. Yet, the genuine justification for why this strategy helps is thusly, you really spread out how much sensations you feel in your body as opposed to focusing it on your penis.

As such, this decreases how much feeling you experience in your masculinity, and alleviates your desire to come. It's an exceptionally basic trick without a doubt which has helped numerous men last a few extra minutes in the bedroom - including myself.

[galacticnova3]

[jigsaw voice] hello, iru umbramaker of the planet halcandra. your chauvinistic treatment of women and minorities is deplorable in itself. while living as a construct, you spent quite a significant portion of your life thieving parts from other ships to sustain yourself, leaving their rusting corpses for dead. now you are a mimic, who devours the flesh of sentient beings with increasingly little remorse. as the days pass by, you grow more and more numb to the blood on your claws. in front of you is a WHAT ARE YOU DOING STOP EATING THE BEAR TRAP

Seeing an anon give me a good summary of my own character just to be bitch slapped by WHAT ARE YOU DOING STOP EATING THE BEAR TRAP at the end was not what I expected when seeing an Iru ask but I love it nonetheless.

Anyways, yeah that’s actually a pretty accurate breakdown of his character development(or regression, depending on how you look at it) and morality. He’s a case where instead of knowing what he’s doing is wrong and acting differently, he knows it’s wrong but increasingly distances himself from it or make justifications to make it bother him less and eventually not at all. Y’know, Sans speech about hurting people becoming easier the more you do it, that whole deal.

As a ship, first it was taking parts for survival because he had no other options, then it was survival and being both better prepared and not just choosing stuff that fit at random, then he considered it survival of the fittest, eventually it turned into depersonalizing other ships to a similar degree as the government does, and finally treating his actions as a form of revenge against the ones who wronged him. His current path of self-unimprovement is on a similar track and being influenced by Lon; hesitantly hunt for survival, hunt people for survival with less guilt(with Lon’s encouragement because hey everyone eats, why make a big deal out of what), hunt people for survival and enrichment, “hunting people isn’t that bad because what are people if not animals with conscience so it’s really not that different from anyone who eats meat anyways”/survival of the fittest, and then “I spent my entire life being treated with disrespect and told I’m a monster, nobody gets to act surprised now that I don’t respect them and am being the beast they always thought I was”. Lon wouldn’t really get or support that last bit, but that’s because they don’t see any need for motivation or justification besides “I’m hungry and bored and people can fix both of those things simultaneously”.

Maybe it’s just because he’s my character but I’d like to think that adds a layer of depth while simultaneously making him scarier. But like, the kind of scary that isn’t based in intimidation or taking joy in doing harm; the kind where the person is so far detached that they are beginning to(or already) stop recognizing the evil they’re performing, consciously in this case. ‘Bragging about murder and violence’ villainy vs ‘talks about having murdered people in the same genuine and casual manner as one would talk about doing the dishes with unsettlingly little indication that they consider the two morally different’ villainy. While I don’t actually plan for him to go quite that far– in that he’ll always know deep down that what he did/does was/is fucked up regardless of what justifications he comes up with– it’s definitely a stark contrast from the content I usually make of him. But that’s intentional; he’s supposed to be the sort of character who’s hard to take seriously until it comes to him actually doing something terrible. Separation of knowing this fucker who would probably fail a test asking for the names of basic fruits and vegetables does awful things and actually considering the thought process behind those things and how he can do them while maintaining his casual and annoying personality.

Yes this got long, but I have been dying to talk about this sort of thing and this gave me the perfect opportunity. Also, I can’t decide if the bear trap would hurt more or less than the times he consistently bit his tongue not long after being mimic-ified.

[butwhatifidothis]

Sacrifice for the Three Lords

So. Got curious about something.

Curious thing got long lol, under the cut

The word sacrifice has a very loaded, very intentional feel to it. For something to be sacrificed, it must be considered less than whatever it is being sacrificed for, whether in the moment or in the long term - it’s the logical conclusion to the act itself. Even if regret for that choice can come later, at the time you are sacrificing whatever is being sacrificed, it is considered less (for example, spending an hour of your time for a stupid meme post you spent too much time on, for a light-hearted start. In hindsight you might think it was stupid or not worth it, but at the time of bungling around in photoshop you considered the time lost as a worthwhile sacrifice to your end product).

With that in mind, how do the three lords view sacrifice? When is it mentioned in their routes? When do they themselves mention it, and what are they pertaining to when they do? I want to focus on the word “sacrifice” specifically, due to the already mentioned connotations and meaning attached to this word in particular

We’ll start with Claude, with his route’s first mention of the word sacrifice being, and I’m not kidding, post ts, at Ailell

What is being sacrificed here is Claude’s independence from Judith. He is expressing a want to not rely on Judith’s help once again but needing to give up that want in order to move on with his goals of winning the war. This is something that he alone is sacrificing with no involvement or need of sacrifice from anyone else - he is the only one losing something from this sacrifice.

The next mention is from Hubert’s letter

The sacrifice being mentioned belongs to Edelgard. Hubert is stating that Edelgard has made sacrifices that must be honored, heavily implying that they were necessary for her goals if they hold such importance as to keep that importance beyond the grave to be passed by those who have defeated her. Claude himself is not sacrificing anything, nor does he state any agreeance to the phrasing used here, but he has said earlier that her methods use too much bloodshed for people to rally behind, implying a disagreeance. 

This is the last time the word sacrifice is used in direct relation to Claude. When it comes to all that has happened to others, Claude specifically does not refer to it as something like a sacrifice that he is making.

Though that does not the word is not used further in VW. Dorothea, in VW:

The sacrifice being made here is deliberate and willing on the part of Count Bergliez. He is making the consenting, thoughtful decision to sacrifice himself because he views his men’s lives as more important than his own, and it is implied that his doing so achieved the desired outcome (the safety of his men). He came to this decision by himself, with no outside force making him do this (outside of the circumstances that prompted it - no one person made him do this). The act of sacrificing yourself for the lives of others is portrayed in a explicitly “positive” light coated in tragedy and even then only if it achieved its goal 

Lastly, for unique mentions on VW, Annette:

Forced sacrifice is seen as something painful. The making of circumstances where sacrifices must be made outside of the will of those making it is portrayed in a explicitly negative light that is sought to be rid of. 

In VW, Claude himself never refers to the loss of life as a sacrifice, and only ever refers to something as a sacrifice when it is him making it in a way that does not affect others. Sacrifice of life is only referred to as “positive” when either 1) Hubert, an amoral character who cannot be part of VW, makes mention of it, or 2) it is the singular sacrifice of one person’s life that they made of their own volition in order to save others, and even then it is portrayed in its context and in later contexts as a tragic event nonetheless

Next: AM

The first mention of the word sacrifice for AM - or in this case, BL - is after Lonato: 

The word sacrifice is not brought up by Dimitri. Byleth says that the loss of life must be accepted, the result of which is explicit denial from Dimitri of the supposed importance of sacrificing civilians. Sacrifice of life -and the direct phrasing of it as a sacrifice - is explicitly portrayed as bad in the eyes of Dimitri; he does not believe that life ought to be sacrificed to achieve one’s goals

Next time, post ts:

The sacrifice of lives is directly, verbatim described as needless. The concept of the idea of lives being less worthy than a cause is explicitly called wrong. Human life is given more value than any goal.

Note how this is a direct reference to his behavior in VW, where he sacrifices his life as well as those around him - save for Dedue, whom Dimitri not sacrificing is what allows VW’s story to continue (due to Dedue providing the blueprints to the throne room for the Alliance army to navigate through). Dimitri’s choice to deliberately not have Dedue sacrifice his life is a positive to the overarching story of VW, while his indifference to the now explicitly needless sacrifice others’ make of their own lives for his personal cause is portrayed in a negative light

And while we’re talking of Gronder (note, this also appears in VW and thus also applies to VW):

Ignatz’s further implies that the sacrifice made at Gronder does not mean anything - it is senseless, and without purpose. It must be given meaning after the fact; it holds nothing in and of itself, as it did not bring about its desired outcome

Next, Catherine:

Sacrifice of the self is seen in an understanding light while simultaneously being seen as something that ought to be avoided. It is also something that is shown to be something that must be up to the individual to decide for themselves, though is regardless seen as something that likely should be talked out of doing

Last for AM, Felix:

The voluntary, willing sacrifice of one’s own life, for the betterment of others, is portrayed as something “positive” that must be repaid by those which the sacrifice was made for. It is not something that can be morally justified in forgetting after the fact - the repayment needs to be made in order for the sacrifice to be “positive.” The intended outcome of the sacrifice must be fulfilled in order for it to be seen as good.

In AM, sacrifice is continuously referred to negatively. Dimitri outright denies the possibility of necessary sacrifices, and the only way sacrifices are seen in a “positive” is if they are 1) willing made by the person sacrificing themselves and/or 2) the desired outcome of the sacrifice is definitively achieved, with the latter stipulation still having caveats that prevent it from ever truly being seen as positive (Count Rowe)

Lastly: CF

Edelgard mention the word sacrifice the same time as Dimitri first does, after Lonato:

Sacrifice of life is seen as a necessity. Edelgard views sacrifice as something that cannot be avoided, and as such, she has no qualms in sacrificing her people’s lives to achieve her goals. She views her cause as having an inherit superiority over the lives of the people. 

Next, during the invasion of Garreg Mach (once you’ve settled on CF as a route):

Sacrifice of human life is once again seen as a necessity for Edelgard to achieve her goals. She states that she will not stop no matter how much blood she spills for her cause. The sacrifice of life is involuntary to those making the sacrifice, and yet it is seen as something that will lead to a positive outcome. The cause is given greater importance over human life.

Next, post ts, before Claude is fought:

The want to not sacrifice own’s life for their cause is seen as a negative. The idea of attempting to save one’s own life at the prospect of certain defeat is questioned in its rationality. There is a lack of understanding in the idea of not sacrificing one’s self to the cause - this is further shown in Edelgard’s death in all other routes, which is caused directly due to her unwillingness to give up her greater cause. She views her own human life as having less importance than her goals, which is consistent with her ideology of sacrificing everything for the greater good.

Notice the other two mentions of the word sacrifice in CF

Linhardt, at the final chapter (which appears in all routes, mind, but since he does default as a BE I feel it pertinent to include within the CF section):

Sacrifice is seen as a sign of desperation. The idea of sacrificing human lives for a greater cause is no longer comforting or a good enough justification. It being described as “depend[ent] on a throw of the dice” directly implies no control from the one(s) sacrificing their lives. 

And the last mention is from Rhea, during the last battle, referring to Rhea burning down Fhirdiad:

Sacrifice is being actively questioned. Edelgard’s reaction to Rhea forcibly sacrificing lives showcases the act as negative. Rhea, in all other routes, is one of Edelgard’s sacrifices she makes for her cause, and now Rhea’s mirroring of sacrificing the people’s lives for what she believes is right is being shown in a explicitly negative light. This is not Edelgard growing to realize that sacrificing human life is wrong as she does not reflect on her own doing so when she criticizes Rhea for the same thing.

In CF, when it is Edelgard speaking of sacrifice, it is always seen as a necessity - something that must be done in order to achieve change. Edelgard actively forces sacrifice on the people due to her believing that her desired outcome cannot be made without it, and so she makes little effort to mitigate this involuntary, large-scale sacrifice. 

But, when similar ideals of the value of human life against one’s own cause is applied to those which oppose her, she no longer sees it as morally justifiable to sacrifice the lives of the people, despite her own willingness to do the same. When sacrifice is seen through the lens of someone other than Edelgard, the idea of sacrificing lives for the greater cause is no longer enough to justify it. 

In contrast to Claude and Dimitri, who do not view such sacrifice as a necessity and thus do not attempt to justify it/force it upon others (except when Dimitri explicitly is doing something wrong, as directly stated by the game), Edelgard cannot fathom the possibility of being unable to sacrifice human life and achieving her goals at the same time. In contrast to Claude and Dimitri, who hold human life above their goals (except when Dimitri explicitly is in the wrong), Edelgard holds her goals above human life. Human life - including her own - has less worth than her goals, thus making it acceptable to sacrifice.

And, well. Considering that people are still being killed in most of Hubert’s endings due to all of the revolts and rebellions against Edelgard’s abrupt, violent, bloody rule rising up, the commonfolk are still not able to receive titles/military credits unless they marry into families which already have that (save for one character, who was previously noble already), and that freedom of choice is not guaranteed as shown by Bernadetta’s endings, along with the slew of other problematic elements in CF’s endings (especially when compared to VW and AM, whose endings portray a far more peaceful Fodlan)... yeah, the sacrifices absolutely did not achieve their stated desired outcome. And that’s when they were voluntary

[labyrinthinesyndicatex]

Gavin felt a flutter in his chest as Ishika bumped her shoulder against his, her laughter making the festival lights seem brighter somehow. Her teasing pulled a genuine smile from him. He'd never been good at this relationship stuff, but with her, words came easier than they should. As they moved forward in line, he confessed, "You caught me red-handed with my fancy food justifications. And yes, I did charm that pie competition. My secret technique involved distracting the judges with random computer facts while simultaneously stuffing my face." He grinned at her, enjoying how her eyes crinkled when she laughed at his ridiculous claims. "My charm is clearly irresistible to both people and baked goods."

When she mentioned expecting a dramatic one-liner for their grilled cheese delivery, he straightened up dramatically. "Oh, I've been rehearsing cheese puns since we got in line. Prepare yourself for groan-worthy masterpieces like 'Time to meet your melted maker' or 'Say cheese to victory.'" Her hand in his felt so natural now, like they'd been doing this forever instead of just a few weeks. "You know," he said softly, meeting her eyes, "I spent years perfecting my brooding loner persona. Then you came along and ruined it completely. Now I'm smiling in public and everything." He lifted their joined hands slightly. "For what it's worth, this is my favorite version of me too. Turns out I'm much happier holding your hand than pretending I don't need anyone." When she tugged him forward, mentioning questionable but delicious choices, he followed willingly. "Lead the way, partner in crime. I'm all in for whatever delicious trouble you've got planned. Just remember, if we get arrested for excessive enjoyment of dairy products, I'm blaming you entirely."

Ishika laughed, the sound light and full of mischief as she bumped her shoulder playfully against his. "Scientific taste-testing, huh? Look at you, using big words to justify ordering extra food. I'm impressed, Mr. Champion." She tilted her head, pretending to study him critically. "You do have an unfair advantage with that smile, though. No wonder you didn't need body-checking. You probably just flashed that grin and charmed the pie right out of the competition." The line for the grilled cheese stand moved slowly, but she didn't mind. Being tangled up in the easy banter with him was better than anything she could've planned. She gave his hand a little squeeze, feeling the warmth of his skin grounding her in the best way. "Also, I fully expect a dramatic one-liner when our grilled cheese triumphs are delivered. Don't let all those action movies go to waste, Gav."

She leaned in just enough so her voice was only for him. "And for the record," she said, her eyes sparkling under the string lights, "I like every version of you. But this one—the one who smiles more and holds my hand like he never wants to let go? This one might just be my favourite." The line moved again, and she tugged him along with a teasing smile. "C'mon, Mr. Pie Champion. Let’s go make some more questionable but delicious life choices together."