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#why did I forget that cameo was a thing
malarkgirlypop · 7 months
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Just remembered that Cameo was a thing and sneakily looked up BoB because I am unwell. And let me tell you fucking Lieb, Malarkey, Toye and Skip and few others are on it. I was cackling watching their videos please! Fucking Ross only has made videos out to this one lady called Christine ahahahha like is she the only one so far who has asked for a cameo ahaha I’m crying!! We love you Christine, I need to meet this lady ahahah. I’m crying. I need someone to buy me a cameo. ROSS CAN FUCKING ROAST YOU IF YOU ASK STOP IT!!
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irrigos · 10 months
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wait why is your face in mask of the rose <- guy who has definitely missed something
bet failbettergames $3,000 that they wouldnt and then they did so i had to pay up
(it was a kickstarter reward)
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chrollohearttags · 6 months
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CHARM’D • mikasa ackerman
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your fiancée gets a new piercing and you decide to have some fun with it.
content + themes: nail tech!mikasa, black fem!reader, y/n is a lash tech, subby mika, her and y/n cracking jokes on each other, overstimulation, pillow humping, use of toys, scissoring, heavy squirting, fingering, bratty mika, gay bestie!armin cameo
── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚.─── ── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* : ── ・
most people would say working with your significant other seems like a great time. Being around the one person you love more then life itself and earning a living at the same time? You couldn’t ask for a better deal. However, it did have its challenging moments..discipline and focus is an important part of anyone’s employment. Regardless of the job but especially when tending to someone’s beauty and esthetic needs, it was imperative to pay attention. Hence why your fiancée despised the fact that you were working alongside her as her new lash tech some days! Granted, she was thrilled to have you around and with an extra service and set of hands around, you guys’ income practically tripled. So it was a pretty sweet deal. However, you didn’t make it easy…in fact, you acted as if giving her a hard time was your actual occupation..
“Are you sure we can’t just fill them in and work around it? C’mon, Mika. You sure you can’t just do your magic?”
“Sweetheart, how long have you been a client of mine? I’m an artist, not a repair woman. Two things I refuse to do is fly coach and work over other people’s fuck ups. Now let’s soak these off so I can give you a fresh set. While you’re waiting, Armin can get you in the shampoo bowl. Since he’s sitting on his skinny ass, doing nothing.”
needless to say, it was never a dull moment! You guys’ hairstylist and resident smartass, Armin Artlert was currently seated in one of the styling chairs, typing away on his phone.
“And don’t forget looking cute. Just blind and grouchy.”
“Whatever. Help her before I suddenly find your replacement.”
it was obvious that the normally laid back nail tech was in rare form this morning. Not so much rude or angry but definitely on edge a little. The shop was a little busy but nothing more than usual for the Sugar and Spice Haus. It was normal for clients to be waiting outside the door so she couldn’t have been frazzled by that. So what exactly had her acting so strange? Perhaps it was a question better answered by the one person who knew her better than anyone else..and who ironically was the root cause of the issue!
“Oh, don’t pay her any attention, y’all. She’s just a little worked up. Isn’t that right, baby?”
just then, a rather gleeful (y/n) would come traipsing from the back of the salon..strapless dress and sandals, holding a caddy full of lash supplies. In return, the only thing you were met with was a decorated middle finger and the roll of dark, doe eyes. Your fiancée was quite the bratty thing when she wanted to be but she was oh so cute….
“Oh shut up. I’m not talking to you right now.”
hence why you took immense pleasure in teasing her among other things..something that began long before the two of you even opened shop this morning..
── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚.─── ── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* : ── ・
flashback: earlier that morning..
── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚.─── ── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* : ── ・
“Oh God!…yes..right there!…”
“Aw, is that your spot, baby? Are you gonna come?”
the high pitch, condescending coo spouting from your lips rang off into the ears of your very whiny and overstimulated fiancée. Who had just been sleep only twenty minutes prior or so it would appear. Because as the two of you awoke for the morning, ready to start another day in the home and salon you shared as not only lovers, but business partners…you were met with a rather pleasant surprise. Faint whimpers and the sight of your precious Mikasa grinding herself against her pillow. Her tits spilling from her tank top; fondled in her palms, hair brushing against the sheets and her panties tugged to the side as her bare slit rubbed profusely against the memory foam material. She had to have been in utter bliss from the sounds erupting from her mouth. Not only that, she looked so sexy..however, you knew it was rather unbecoming of your woman too. Granted, your sex life was anything but mundane and the two of you took any opportunity plausible to fuck, lick or kiss on one another. However, for the past few days or so, she seemed to be evading you. Claiming to be far too exhausted for any sort of sexual activity. She’d shower alone and even halt you if things got too intense. One would think that was indicative of infidelity and that their partner was with someone else. But alas, her dirty little secret came to light and needless to say, you’d return the pent up sexual frustration ten fold!..
“Oh? What’s this?…” she just knew that once you unveiled the truth, you’d never allow her to live it down. And she was correct.
“(Y/N)..baby…fuck me!..”
the truth was, she had snuck behind your back and acquired a clit piercing. More than likely from the same artist who had decorated her skin in the plethora of tattoos she sported. But what she hadn’t counted on was becoming so hypersensitive afterwards. It was one of those things that could go either way, depending on the person. Getting piercings in intimate area could either make you lose all feeling or make you super sensitive to the touch. For poor Mikasa, she was the latter to a fault! You would’ve thought that she would’ve learned her lesson when she got her nipples pierced and they sent her into a frenzy with something as simple as putting on a bra on. But you were more than happy to meet her request..flipping her over onto her back, (y/n) promptly shoved your tongue into her mouth; jaw agape and slack from being on the brink of climax. Her pierced nipples puffy and erect and of course..that adorable little clit; marked with a silver ball and bar going through it. It looked so cute and she looked even more precious..practically begging for you to claim her. Slick surrounded that fat pussy of hers and you just knew she was close.
“Oh you poor thing…you’ve been holding out on me…don’t worry, mama. I’ll take care of you..”
reassuring her with your lips honing on her neck. Tender kisses trailing down her throat and those fingers following suit to her mound. Tracing your digits across her freshly waxed skin, you’d tease around the area, refusing to touch the actual bud. “But first..I need you to do sum’ for me, okay?” So gently cooing to her. At this point, she was desperate so she was at your mercy.
“Yes, baby!..whatever you want..”
crying out as you moved your fingertips lower as well as your mouth, leaving them to hover over her jeweled nipples. Drawing a long trail of saliva along with you in the process. That’s when you’d shove those two opposite fingers between her lips and force her to suckle, drumming up her own spit. “Suck on these f’r me. Get them wet…just like that.” She’d happily comply, knowing that you’d help her reach her peak soon. Whilst she was busy drooling and whining, you’d ease one digit inside of her with your thumb resting on her clit. She looked so helpless and vulnerable..turning you on more and more by the second. Mikasa’s back would raise from the bed as you pushed those digits knuckle deep into her core. You’d feel them suction and tighten around you and continue pressing until they were stained with a sheath of milky white and sticky clear liquid..dripping all down your nails. You kept them short just for special instances like these. So you could pump them in and out her pretty pussy and watch her squirm, yelping for more.
“Ah! Haaaa…oh my god! Right there! Yes…”
“Aw, am I in your spot, baby? Are you gonna come?”
nodding her head profusely; your dormant thumb now tracing circles against her clit and even flicking that piercing for added stimulation. Needless to say, she couldn’t hold back any longer and seconds later, when you finally gave her permission, you’d find your arm, the sheets and anything surrounding you two drenched in her juices. Squirting everywhere..and became inconsolable afterwards. “That’s it!…let it go, let it go for meee..squirt on those fingers.” Encouraging with loud cries ringing out through the bedroom. She was practically convulsing once you withdrew your fingers. Allowing them to drip, you’d dangle them over her lips and allow her to clean them off. “Mmmhm..taste yourself, baby…you look so pretty.”
running a hand along her torso and up to her throat yet again to wrangle her in for a kiss. Haven gotten a taste of her sweet essence, you decided to get your entire fill by finally leaving a trail of pecks leading to her pelvis before tousling your own side of the covers off and climbing on top of her. Without missing a step, you’d part her inked up legs and pin one back whilst intertwining the other with your own. From there, you’d tear off the thin lacy panties she was wearing off and put them to much practical use like gagging her. From there, you’d align your frothing slits and start grinding them against one another. Tugging down your own sports bra; dressed in only a bonnet and having fallen asleep with nothing on your lower half, you had become well aroused on your own from her little escapades. With that, Mika would buck her hips forward and work herself against you; meeting your thrusting with tearful pleas to keep fucking her. “Don’t stop, baby! Please don’t fucking stop…” her voice was cracking but her words very concise and clear. Those perky tits bounced around underneath as she gripped the silk linen underneath your bodies. The smacking of your clammy folds and warmth made for a beautiful chorus of steamy, nasty sounds filling the atmosphere…she wasn’t the only one feeling the pressure either because you soon found yourself nearing an orgasm. “I’m gonna come too, mama…fuck! You feel so good..”
laughing out of pure delirium and pleasure, unable to slow down in fear that you’d come on the spot. Those sticky juices smeared across each of your thick thighs as those lower lips meshed together. Eventually, you’d find yourself leaning down to let your tongues clash as well. “Mmph! I love you…” “I love you too, Mika! Fuck, baby…come for me again..”
just then, she’d follow your order and flail around as another stream of juices exited both of your bodies. Spraying up everything in the vicinity. Rubbing those finger pads against her throbbing bud, (y/n) drummed out more and more until she couldn’t spill another drop. You found yourselves going round for round..drawing out one another’s arousal and all that you had to offer. An hour or so had past; an array of positions from being seated on her face while you ate her out, to riding a double sided dildo…
“Yes, baby! You look so pretty riding that fucking dick..go deeper..”
to finally ended your rather heated session with your fingers intertwined as you played with yourselves. Massaging those clots to your final climatic rushes. Coming down in a powerful high with tears streaming down your faces and squirt pooling down your legs. All in all, it seemed that her little piercing was a success and rather useful investment.. “C’mere..that feel good?..” “..yeah..thank you, baby..so much.” Fucked out and dazed from being overly stimulated. But neither of you regretted a thing..that was until you made another proposal with a deviant glare on your face..reaching over into the dresser, you’d retrieve another device: a controller vibrator. One you planned to utilize on her throughout the work day!
“Hell no, (y/n)! I can’t..”.
but it was too late..you had already placed it inside of her and would be utilizing it until you had your fill. You wanted to see how she fared with her little body modification when you were the one in control..and throughout an entire day of work.
maybe next time she wouldn’t keep such secrets from you!
••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
@soanis @merakidoll
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ladybirdswritings · 5 months
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Silken Webs & Pirouettes - Miguel O’Hara x Reader
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Summary - Miguel has plotted the entirety of his adult life to perfection, always in control and always respected. He owns a successful business that he buries himself in to forget what he left behind. People fear him, women throw themselves at him. Yet one thing remains strong for Miguel, order. When a clumsy little ballerina twirls into his life with no skills other than looking pretty and standing on her tip toes, Miguel is in for more than just pink ribbons and flushed cheeks. Alternate Universe with most of the characters included as seen in "Across the Spiderverse." Many cameos ahead. Miguel is a successful business owner but personality is canon. This is a steamy reader insert, Miguel x You! Enjoy and pls leave me lots of love and comments as it keeps me motivated <333
next chapter
one:
“Good, now turn.”
The strawberry blonde with bevelled locks complies, adorned in curled tresses and lilac cloth. It inches just below her bum. A twirling starlet for his hungry eyes. She catches them in a quick glance as she rounds her turn. Oh... Never mind then, they're unimpressed. She halts.
"Did I tell you to stop?" His voice is firm, cold, devoid of any sweetness like the warm and awfully bitter joe her father drinks this time of year when the ground is colored cream and the snowfall kisses flushed cheeks. The southern drawl peeks through her sweet, mousy little voice to greet the man before her. The suit he wears today is far too tiny for the muscles laced into is carmel skin, just like the rest of the ones stuffing his closet full.
"Well no but... I only did cause I can tell you don't like it."
He raises a sharp brow, fingertip scratching at the fresh stubble greeting his skin.
"You're right. I don't... but that doesn't mean I gave you permission to stop."
Lacy turns red, and yet the doll gives him another turn immediately. His eyes fall upon her bum. It's small and shaped prettily. Petite like the rest of her. But this lilac, ribbon clad number isn't pretty like her. Not to his eyes.
"You look like a slut."
Miguel is bold with his words, never once allowing his brain a second to gloss them over with second thought. Pretty, poor little Lacy gulps. She is flushed again.
"Well ain't that how you like me to look?"
He stares for a moment, tapping his index against his chin. He blinks slow, and assess her words for a moment. Then he stands, no- he towers rather over her small frame. She would cower if it wouldn't make her look so pathetic in front of the man she loves. He walks closer, words lacing each step he takes.
"Men like to imagine what's underneath. Like a Christmas present, Lacy. No one gets excited when it’s already been torn open... unwrapped.”
She gulps, icy blue eyes raising to meet his as he finally reaches her. A warm hand, even in December's icy clutches, meets her face. So gentle for a man so rough with her in silken sheets. It's why, of course. Why she loves him, a thing he can never know. He would kick her to the curb, and that's even scarier than keeping it a treasured little secret for her and her alone. She knows this because of Amber, the auburn haired girl and Rowan... the other blonde. Only three of the dozens that whispered those dreadful three words and got kicked to the concrete curb. It's just sex, that's all it is and ever allowed to be. That's what he told them all from the beginning, so they should know better.
Yet even through following these cruel rules, smart, sexy lacy adorned in lilac knows much better. She pouts, pink lip fighting not to quiver at the thought clutching her frozen and cold. His thumb gently strokes her alabaster cheek, and she whispers.
"You're growin' tired of me, ain't you?" She whispers it like it's the most heinous thing a human could say. His silence, the gentle exhale of breath that she hears just above the mandatory office Christmas playlist humming very quietly behind his oak door, to his dismay of course, all of it confirms her deep rooted fear. But maybe? He parts his lips to speak, her hope sprouts like springtime flowers in snow. But then?
"Sir, excuse me but this is urgent."
He stares at his pathetic little Lacy for a moment longer, eyes still pouring into hers as he responds to the pencil skirt peeking through the oak.
"What is it, Cindy?"
She pauses, "Sir, Javi had to leave due to an unfortunate family emergency."
Lacy's eyes drop, another moment longer of this torture and she's certain to start watering up. The dormant space between his eyebrows is pinched, almost pitiful looking. Yet his thumb still grazes her soft skin. So capable of focusing on his torn open present and the pencil skirt all at once.
"Okay?" He sounds annoyed, and he is.
"Sir, he was set to interview the new hire today. She's been waiting downstairs for about an hour."
He lets out another breath, sharper and more poisoned with undeniable annoyance. His hand drops from Lacy now.
"Then have one of my many other capable employees get the job done, Miss Moon. It can't be that difficult."
She winces, staring at her cautious reflection in his shiny tiles.
"Sir, tonight is the company's annual white elephant, remember? Morale? Miss Drew is hosting?"
He hates this time of year, truly and utterly despises it. And stupid little Cindy Moon? He hates her too, right now. His index and thumb lift to pinch at the bridge of his nose, shaking his head in exasperation.
"Then tell the hire to go find another place to work. We don't need any more useless hands around here."
Cindy frowns at that.
"Sir, with all due respect, we really could use extra hands around here... s-she's been waiting for an hour and it's the holiday season, she left twenty voicemails in the past week alone. Besides, after Daily Bugle's smear campaign about the lack of morale here, we would be stupid to make more enemies for them to put under the spotlight."
He hates her more now, because she's right. Lacy's head is still bowed but her peripheral is engullphed by emptiness once Miguel leaves her, collapsing onto the Italian leather throne tucked away in is desk.
"The stupid music and blue elephant wasn't enough, huh?"
Cindy Moon, she is payed enough for this of course, yet she is still frowning nonetheless.
"S' white elephant..." she cautiously corrects in a near silent whisper. His chocolate eyes narrow as he looks upon the girl. Her rapunzel-like, jet black hair tied up in a neat bun atop her head.
A moment passes, then another. Her horribly true words echo in his mind on repeat until he finally gives in.
"Send her up in five, I'll handle it. Get Lacy's coat, have someone escort her to her car."
If strawberry Lacy's frown could be any more prominent, it would. Yet that doesn't seem possible. He ignores her well, stacking his scattered papers into a neat pile and shaking his head as Cindy leads Lacy out.
Then? He waits for the mystery girl waiting anxiously downstairs... you.
chap 1 song 🎧 :
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embrosegraves · 3 months
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𝔻𝕖𝕔𝕖𝕟𝕥𝕝𝕪 𝕊𝕞𝕦𝕘
(request) Carlos Sainz Jr x Reader "Are you decent?" "Probably not morally, but I've got clothes on, if that's what you're asking"
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Dating a Formula One driver meant that life would never be smooth sailing. For a lot of people, this was terrifying and if you were honest with yourself, it did scare you a bit at first. However now that you were a few years into it, it wasn’t as bad as you once thought. Sure there were moments that you wished you could live even a tiny bit more privately, but such is life unfortunately. One thing you were grateful for about this chaotic spin on life (besides your boyfriend of course), was that your career was thriving. There was no way your career wouldn’t thrive. You were a lifestyle vlogger with access to the unadvertised side of a world famous athlete. 
You had been filming snippets of your life long before you had crossed paths with Carlos. Having been in the vlogging business for 8 years now, you had been dating Carlos for 3. Carlos was well aware of your career choice and while it had taken him a while to get used to you filming every other week, he eventually came to terms with it. He even managed to start having a bit of fun with it. Your fans always loved when Carlos made a cameo in your videos.
Currently, Carlos was getting dressed in your shared ensuite, having just finished showering after his training session, while you were filming in the kitchen. Today had been a filming day for you. You had taken the camera with you as you went grocery shopping, explaining that you were planning a home date for Carlos and yourself. You filmed as you went shopping for a small gift to give Carlos and you filmed as you prepped the food you planned to cook with Carlos later. 
Originally, you were content with waiting for Carlos to be done before you even went near the bedroom but you had forgotten something that you had left on your vanity. Camera in hand, you thought why not record the retrieval as a sort of spy-esque montage. It would be fun for the fans and yourself, and who could say no to pretending to be a spy? Opening your bedroom door, you moved the camera in a way that made it look like you rolly-pollied your way across your room. Making sure the camera was facing you, you began to ‘sneakily’ rummage through everything on your vanity in search for the “hidden jewel that had been stolen by pirates”. However it was nowhere to be seen. 
“Alright guys, I think we’ll have to give up on being spies. I’m pretty sure I left it in the ensuite because it’s not on my vanity.” You explained to the camera. “There’s just one problem. Carlos is currently in said ensuite and I have no idea if he’s naked or not. Which isn’t normally a problem but I’m selfish so I’m gonna gatekeep that from you all.”  
You quickly made your way to the ensuite door and knocked loud enough for Carlos to hear over his music. You could hear him turn off his music. 
“Yeah?” He called from inside. 
“I’m filming.” You said. “Are you decent?” 
“I mean probably not morally, but I’ve got clothes on if that’s what you meant.” You heard him laugh to himself as you opened the door. You poked your head through first, just to be safe. Seeing that he was indeed dressed, you moved the camera to face him. 
“I’m keeping that in, I hope you know that.” 
“I would hope so, that was hilarious. The people need to know that I’m funny.” He walked up to you and gave you a kiss. “Did you need something?” 
“Mmm.” You hummed as his hands came to rest on your hips. “I honestly don’t even remember what it was.” 
Carlos chuckled before he grabbed something from the bathroom counter. He held it in front of you with a smirk on his face. 
“It wouldn’t happen to be the mini ring light that you always forget to put back on your vanity, would it?” 
Your sheepish smile told him everything he needed to know.
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overall, I'm pretty happy with how this turned out. With twitter in shambles over what happened, I thought I'd post the Carlos request I had in my drafts, as a treat/distraction.
I hope you all enjoyed!
Likes, replies and reblogs are always appreciated!
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juyeonszn · 5 months
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PARTY O’CLOCK
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PAIRING choi chanhee x f!reader
WORD COUNT 5.39k
GENRES fluff ﹒smut
WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, mature language, tau beta zeta frat treasurer!chanhee, reader is a stereotypical party girl, she’s also an astronomy major, mentions of alcohol, i’m pretty sure everyone makes a cameo at some point, kevin moon playing matchmaker, we escalate a little fast so, intense making out, marking, vaginal fingering, brat tamer!chanhee, dom!chanhee, lowkey pussy job for like 1 second, nipple play? kinda?, unprotected sex, wall sex, missionary, multiple orgasms, creampie (yk… the usual), overstimulation
SUMMARY in spite of being a frat boy himself, chanhee could never actually see himself enjoying the luxuries of the title. besides, how could he with all the responsibilities of being treasurer? enter you and your carefree spirit and chanhee’s got a real big problem on his hands.
MORE … don’t yell at me PLEASE. i know this is 2 days overdue. I KNOW I KNOW. i’ve been so busy these past couple days and my time management is ass we already know this. BUT IM HERE AND SHES FINISHED AND ITS CHRISTMAS EVE SO??? 🙏🙏😍 anyways. i hope u guys enjoy i had a fun time writing this. i’m a firm believer in dom chanhee 😋 if u liked this pls don’t forget to reblog!
SERIES MASTERLIST
PERM TAGLIST @winterchimez @maessseongs @itsbeeble @zzoguri @deoboyznet @cloverdaisies @vernyangel @ericlvr
TAGLIST @millksea
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“Who’s that?”
The question comes out before you can even stop it, eyes focused on a guy sitting on one of the couches in the living room, complete disinterest all over his face. He’s pretty. Prettier than any guy you’ve ever seen. But he also looks like he’d rather be anywhere else than at this party.
“Who?” Your friend Heejin asks, following your gaze.
She finds out pretty quickly, especially because of how intense your stare is. She racks her brain for his name, sure it’s somewhere in her catalog of the student body. Heejin was the kind of person who knew everyone even if she didn’t exactly know them personally. She was both sociable and obsessed with gossip, sticking her nose in the business of those around her.
“Ah! That’s Choi Chanhee,” she nods, index finger tapping her chin. “He’s the Tau Beta Zeta treasurer actually. That’s probably why he looks like he wants to kill himself. Dude doesn’t really want to be here, but fraternity brothers are required to attend every party.”
She’s right, it appears, when you see some of the members you do recognize make their way over to bother him. He definitely does not look like the fraternity type, but you guess it also makes sense in a way. Maybe he needed an extracurricular or something that would be nice on his resume.
It’s hard for you to enjoy yourself for the rest of the night, too concentrated on the treasurer who’s lips stay pressed into a frown the entire time. You try to take shots with Heejin, but your eyes gravitate back to the sofa. Ji Changmin and his girlfriend even convinced the two of you to play them in beer pong. (Worst mistake you’ve ever made. You sucked at beer pong.) You finally draw the line at a game of Rage Cage, when you strategically get placed between Lee Juyeon and Heejin, arguably the best drinkers at the function.
Everyone laughs at you when you take a step back and recall your decision to join. And just as you suspected, you end up back in the living room, right where you wanted. Chanhee hasn’t moved from his spot, occasionally taking sips of whatever he’s drinking and scrolling through his phone.
You remember when that was Jacob Bae’s thing to do, and then he went and got himself a girlfriend. Perhaps that’s what Chanhee needed to do. A girlfriend was a little bit of a stretch, but someone to help him loosen up at these things was plausible. Girls weren’t even trying to hit on him left and right like they usually did with the Tau Beta Zeta boys, which was even more surprising considering most of them had their own partners now. Desperation was an ugly look on the university female, you know.
Which is exactly why you don’t make any moves that night.
Initially, you think you’ll wait a week. You happen to see him on campus a few times. The first time is in the library studying with some headphones on, in his element. The second time is in the cafe on campus, again, doing coursework with the intention of being left alone. Then it’s when you’re leaving your Fundamentals of Astronomy lecture, walking to one of his own classes. In your head, you’re being tested, like a dog with a bone being dangled in front of its face. It’s tortuous, wanting to go up to him and introduce yourself, but you don’t do it.
Heejin “drags” you to another TBZ party the following Friday and you put extra effort into your outfit. You walk in with the hopes to sweep him off of his feet, strutting into the fraternity house with a confidence that throws you off. Just when you’re getting ready to walk up to him, Kim Sunwoo intercepts and you backtrack. That ruins any of the lingering self-assurance in your system. So you push things back another week.
The next time you plan on striking, you and Heejin had said you’d meet at the party since she had something to do prior. You arrive at around 11 PM, prepared to shoot your shot and score. The kitchen is the first place you go, concocting yourself a drink that doesn’t get you trashed, but provides enough liquid courage. Then Heejin texts that her project partners wanted to grab food and she wasn’t going to make it. The thought of being alone without moral support effectively kills your mood, so you only stay for another hour or so before leaving.
It’s annoying, really. Every single time you attempt to set your plan into motion, something has to interrupt and mess things up for you.
This is your dilemma for roughly every weekend for a whole month. By the time you know it, it’s midterm season and you’re too stressed out over exams to think about Choi Chanhee. Divine intervention was a crazy concept, so maybe it was a blessing in disguise. Maybe this was your sign to just call it quits and give up on your weird fantasy of being the girl who charmed him.
“Do you wanna go to the TBZ party Saturday? We can celebrate finishing these stupid fucking exams and just relax for another couple months before we have to worry about finals.” Heejin asks through a mouthful of instant ramyeon. You sigh.
“Sure, whatever.” Your lips purse, pushing around your own food. She raises an eyebrow, tilting her head to the side in confusion.
“What the hell happened to you? You were jumping for joy when it came to going to them all semester, but now that I want to get shitfaced, you don’t seem all that excited.” She puts her chopsticks down, narrowing her eyes at you from across the table. You shrug.
“I don’t know,” you rest your cheek on your palm, huffing. “I guess I’m not really in the party mood anymore.”
“Bullshit,” she scoffs. “You’re the girl everyone thinks of when they talk about the typical university party girl. There must be a reason you’re suddenly Miss Debbie Downer.”
You could just tell her the truth, tell her about your delusions and the need to be different. As your roommate and best friend, she wasn’t at liberty to judge you. But this was so unlike you, so you knew she would anyway. It was out of character for you to be this enthralled by a man, let alone a stranger you’ve never spoken a word to. In fact it’s even thrown you for a loop, this mental break giving you clarity about your recent actions.
“That time I asked you who Choi Chanhee was,” you start after some silence. “I thought about going up to him and finding out why he’s so uptight. I sorta wanted to be in a ‘not like other girls’ situation. But whenever I wanted to swoop in, something always interfered. And now I’m just over it.”
“Y/N. You cannot be serious,” Heejin gawks at you like you’ve grown a second head. “Chanhee’s very picky about the girls he talks to. I could probably name on a hand the ones who’ve successfully snuck their way into his pants. He has specific taste, too; pretty ones who know when to shut their mouths.”
Your jaw drops, because what the fuck? He’s not a raging virgin with that personality? No wonder there wasn’t a line of single ladies attempting to land in his bed. They all knew they didn’t stand a chance. It kind of encourages you to resume your mission. You were never one to back down from a challenge.
“In that case…” A mischievous glint sparkles in your eye.
“Good god,” she rolls her own. “I’m warning you now, I highly doubt this will end in your favor.”
“You know me, Heejin. I never take no for an answer.”
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It’s the day before the party and you’re walking out of your last midterm exam, a new light in your eyes now that you’re somewhat free. You step into the quad with your arms stretched above your head, a yawn pushing through your lips. You were long overdue for a good nap.
“Y/N!”
You whip around to find Kevin Moon from your Music Appreciation class stalking towards you. Part of you wants to pretend you’d never heard him and keep walking, drained of energy after that Intro to Astrophysics exam you’d just taken. Your brain felt like mush at this point. But you were kind, and you would’ve just felt bad about ignoring him anyways.
Kevin catches up to you rather quickly, hands hidden inside of his hoodie pockets. He lets out a sigh, both of you watching the puff of air that forms in front of him. “You’re going to the party tomorrow right?”
“I am…” You furrow your eyebrows, narrowing your eyes skeptically just a bit. “Why?”
“I have a huge favor to ask you.” He clasps his hands together, as if he wasn’t above begging on his hands and knees. You’re confused even further, because what could Kevin Moon possibly want from you?
“Okay… What is it?” The suspicion in your tone is so strong, that there’s no doubt he hasn’t noticed it by now. He holds the heel of his palm to his forehead.
“So, I was supposed to go with my friend Chanhee to try out that new outer space themed coffee place just outside of campus later today, but I got put on alcohol duty and I won’t be able to. I know you’re an Astronomy major so I figured that was something you’d like. Do you think you could go in my place?” He bats his eyelashes at you, like doing puppy dog eyes will convince you. You stare at him blankly. He wants you to do what?!
Meeting Choi Chanhee before the party tomorrow was not in your itinerary. Usually you were decent at adapting to changes in your plans, but this? This was more than just something minor that you could acclimate to. You had to psych yourself for hours in order to execute something of this caliber. Was Kevin Moon trying to send you into cardiac arrest?
“W-Wh— I mean— well—” You fumble over your words— something you never do— and Kevin breaks into a wide grin. You’re not sure if the blush across your face is from the cold weather nipping at it, or the thought of being put between a rock and a hard place.
“Perfect! I owe you one! Meet him in like an hour.” He pats your back like you’re one of the homies, not giving you any room for refutation. You actually feel like throwing up. How were you supposed to just show up without qualms?
Did he really expect you to just do this out of the goodness of your heart? No complaints stacked up to be hurled in his direction? You’d known Kevin Moon since freshman year orientation, but you didn’t think you were close enough for him to throw his dirty work at you. You can’t help but stand there dumbly as he walks away, a pep in his step that nearly has tick marks forming on your temple.
Okay, you know what? This is fine. This was totally fine. All you had to do was sip on some coffee, make some small talk, and then you could be on your way. It wasn’t that hard… was it?
You could throw on an act, pretend like you were one of those pretty girls who knew when to shut their mouths just like Heejin said he was into. You could give him a false glimpse into who you were and he wouldn’t know what you were really thinking of doing. The you of tomorrow would be a complete 180° turn around from the you of today, and Choi Chanhee would be the one groveling at your feet.
As soon as you walk into the cafe, your throat feels narrow, like it was closing in on you. You’re not sure why you’re so nervous. It’s not like Chanhee knew you. He couldn’t possibly be aware of your existence, much less of your little fascination with him.
You see him sitting at a table for two, the straw of his drink trapped between his lips. He sips leisurely as he scrolls through his phone, likely waiting on Kevin since you’re sure he left his friend in the dark. You pick at a thread on your sweater as you stop in front of him, raising your hand in an awkward wave. Chanhee glances up, confusion in his features at first and then it morphs into something else.
A laugh has to be held back when he chokes on his drink, slapping a hand over his mouth. He stands up quickly, wiping his palms on his pants.
“Hi,” your voice is small, so far off from your usual boldness. “I’m Y/N. Kevin sent me.”
“Fucking Kevin,” he curses underneath his breath, forcing a smile. “Um, please sit.”
You take the seat across from him, eyes flickering around the coffee shop to absorb your surroundings. It’s pretty, the stars and planets painted all over the walls and ceilings. Even the drinks had celestial themed names. Your friend was right, you would love it here. It was right up your alley.
“I— uh— Kevin had texted me and told me what to order for him, but I’m assuming he meant for you, because he never told me you were uh— that you were coming.” He scratches the back of his neck as a server leaves a drink in front of you.
“He stopped me in the quad after my midterm and asked if I could fill in for him. Something came up apparently.” You explain, humming in appreciation when you taste your coffee. “He remembered that I was an Astronomy major and figured I was his best bet I guess.”
Chanhee purses his lips, it’s almost like he knows something you don’t. He nods slowly. “Yeah… I’m sure that’s why…”
The impromptu formal introduction between you goes on without a hitch. It goes so well, that the time flies faster than you’d hoped it would. You get a tiny peek into Choi Chanhee and his life as the TBZ fraternity treasurer, but it’s not enough to satiate that unbearable curiosity that pricks at you.
Thankfully, you have tomorrow to do exactly that.
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Heejin and yourself arrive at the Tau Beta Zeta party that Saturday with a goal in mind; Getting Choi Chanhee into bed with you.
Okay. Maybe that wasn’t actually the main objective, but it was definitely a side quest. What you really wanted to do was get him to let his guard down. Like your friend said previously, you were the stereotypical party girl. Had there been a picture beside the term in a dictionary, your pretty little face would be there, a red solo cup in your hand and all. If he wound up being entranced by your womanly witchery, that was on him.
Just like your first go at wooing him, you decided to pull out all the stops. You’d worn your shortest, tightest fitting dress despite the weather not necessarily permitting it. It was a cute black strapless number that you paired with some long heeled boots and a warm fuzzy jacket. You looked hotter than the sun itself, and deep down you’d feel extremely disappointed if he wasn’t falling to his knees for you by the end of the night.
A sense of déjà vu washes over you the moment you step through the front door into the jam packed fraternity house. The bumping early 2000s music and the thrumming of the bass gave you an adrenaline rush like no other. Nothing could waver your confidence this roundabout. He wouldn’t even know what hit him.
Before you sink your claws into the treasurer, you need to grab yourself a drink. You and Heejin take a shot from one of the various liquor bottles on the counter, serving yourselves each a cup of whatever Jacob Bae threw together for the party. It was kind of funny that the resident bartender for these things wasn’t even a member of the frat. You and your friend cheers to the night ahead of you, manifesting that things go your way.
It’s rather easy to catch his eye even in the bustling crowd of drunk college students, glued in his usual spot on one of the living room sofas. His dark hair falls into his eyes when he glances down at his phone to check the time, almost as if he was counting down the hours, the minutes until this party was over. He brushes it out of his face with his index finger at the same time he raises his cup to his mouth, knocking back the contents with a slight wince.
He espies your presence immediately after that, raking your figure with an unrecognizable look in his gaze. Though you were shivering upon entering the house, your skin felt hot to the touch now, the burning intensity of his stare melting away any nerves that might’ve been lingering. You pull your jacket off of your shoulders, tossing it over your forearm as you snake through the bodies sardined between the two of you.
“Hi,” you greet once you’re in front of him. “I’m Y/N.”
His lips quirk upwards and he stands so you’re no longer peering down at him. In spite of meeting each other yesterday, he decides to play along. “I’m Chanhee.”
“Well, Chanhee,” you bite your acrylic nail, not bothering to hide the unabashed desire in your expression and drinking in his appearance like a glass of water. “I couldn’t help but notice you from across the room. You looked bored and I was wondering if I could change that. I know how to have a good time.”
Chanhee thinks it’s cute, the amount of effort you’re putting into this little charade. He doesn’t doubt that you knew of his reputation when it came to sleeping with girls. He knows he’s a bit conscientious when it comes to this sort of thing, but that’s only because he doesn’t want to deal with being seen as someone who’s ran-through. (For an example, please see (No) Strings Attached™.)
However, you were different. Chanhee thought you were cute from the very first time he saw you, which happened to be at a Tau Beta Zeta party last semester. He knew you were friends with Kevin, so maybe it was on him for the delay of your union, but he’d grown a little tired of always making the first move. He’s somewhat grateful that you were the type of girl who set her sights on something and never backed down from it. You were headstrong and that was exactly what had him hooked.
Nevertheless, it would be a bit of an issue. The only part of the rumors surrounding the treasurer that was true, was the part about him preferring his partners to be on the quieter side. There was something about them following his every demand, kneeling at his beck and call, that lit a fire underneath him. The mouthier they were, the less he enjoyed himself. But for some reason, he doesn’t think it’ll bother him as much with you. In fact, he thinks he’ll have fun putting you in your place.
“You know, Y/N,” he pushes your hair over your bare shoulder, letting his thumb graze your warm skin with a small but conniving grin. “I’m not too sure you’ll be able to cure this boredom that’s been plaguing me. It depends on what you have in mind.”
You might cry. A strained groan stays stuck in your throat, fighting to inch its way out of you. Fuck this stupid party. Fuck your stupid idea. You had a new mission. You needed him now and you needed him bad.
Your lips are on his in a matter of seconds, rushed and desperate. You don’t have the strength in you to act like you weren’t just about ready to combust. The curve of a smile can be felt through the kiss, his hands coming to rest on your waist and dig into the fabric of your dress. Had this been any other guy, any other day even, you would’ve freaked out over the PDA. Right now, though, you’re too lost in the moment, too absorbed in the high that kissing Choi Chanhee is providing.
His mouth travels along your jaw and neck, finally snapping you back to reality. With shaky breathing and a wavering voice, you step back from him. “Don’t you want— don’t we need some privacy?”
He laughs like he’s on the inside of a joke you’re unaware of. “Oh, so now you care about privacy? You didn’t when you were trying to seduce me ten minutes ago.”
Your cheeks flush impossibly more, cowering into the space where his shoulder meets his collarbone. All that confidence and for what? He really could not wait another second to see you crumble beneath him.
“Too shy for me to fuck you in front of all these people, sweetheart?” He asks in your ear, leaving a gentle kiss on the lobe as he does so.
You’re dizzy, so dizzy you might faint in the middle of this living room. Who would’ve known that such a pretty boy had such a filthy mouth on him? He knows he’s got you right where he wants you when you fist the material of his shirt, the vibrations of a whine on his neck. It’s kind of comical how little it took for you to crack.
He hauls you away to what you assume is his bedroom, fingers caressing the inside of your wrist. You think maybe he’s all talk, that he’s actually a big softie who couldn’t hurt a fly. The way he’s careful with his touch and making sure he doesn’t lose you as you weave through the other party attendees. At least, that’s what you thought.
But then he’s slamming his door shut and pinning you against it face first. His lips return to their prior position, sucking in the plush skin on your throat and your shoulders. You can feel him pressed into your lower back, hard and ready for you. He doesn’t seem to pay much attention to it, instead trailing his fingers down your front and sneaking under your dress.
He bunches it up around your hips, middle and ring digits circling your clit through the lace of your panties. Everything is escalating too quickly for you to comprehend. You whimper into the wood of the door, drool beginning to pool in your mouth. You’re so needy that you’re salivating over the prospects of what’s to come.
“Want more, Chanhee,” your words are muffled, but he understands you nonetheless.
“You want more?” He pouts, a false tone of sympathy in his voice. “Poor you, asking for something you can’t even handle.”
You squirm, raising your leg in an attempt to reach a different angle. The pads of his fingers apply an increased pressure on your clit, the friction caused by your underwear skyrocketing your heart rate. You know he can feel the pulse when his lips reconnect to that sensitive area just under your jaw. Your back arches, still craving and yearning for additional touch.
His fingers slip into the waistband of your thong, collecting your arousal and using it as a lubricant to glide through your folds. He thrusts two of them in and out of your entrance, the heel of his palm rubbing up against your clit. You moan, louder this time. His free hand shoves the top of your dress down, groping and kneading your bare breast. You wanted more, he’ll give you more.
You’re a whining, squirrely mess, humping his hand like a bitch in heat. It’s hilarious, really. The way you wanted him begging, but the tables seemed to have turned, flipping it the other way around. He ensures that he leaves his mark on you, biting your skin with the intent to bruise. He doesn’t care if you looked like you were attacked by a vicious animal. If Chanhee was anything, he was possessive, wanting everyone to know what was his and not to get near it lest they wanted to keep their lives. What better way to stake his claim than on your body, where anyone could see?
He senses that you’re close to your release, your walls clenching around his fingers and sucking them in further. Most people would’ve been generous, making your orgasm smooth sailing. But Choi Chanhee was not like most people. That much is obvious when he adds a third finger, restraining himself from groaning at the feeling of your cunt constricting and contracting. The stretch has your stomach tying in knots, each one growing tighter and tighter until they just about untangle altogether.
You cum with a guttural groan, nearly convulsing in his hold, but he keeps you pressed to the surface of the door. He doesn’t stop his motions, fingers curling and uncurling like he was reaching for something inside of you. You push your ass into his crotch, another whine escaping your lips when you feel his cock impressing into it. He bites his tongue to refrain from evoking a sound.
The poised nature of your regular personality makes a comeback, one of your hands cupping the side of his face. You pant as you speak, rasping slightly after all the moaning you just did. “Can you fuck me for real now?”
Chanhee forces your underwear down your legs roughly, kicking them out of the way once they hit the floor. “You’re such a goddamn brat. Nothing is ever enough for you is it?” You can hear rustling behind you, the unbuttoning of pants and the discarding of his shirt. And then you feel him. God, you might die. He’s flush between your lower lips, his teeth grazing your earlobe. “Gonna have to fuck you until you learn your place, don’t I?”
He squeezes your cheeks together with his thumb and forefinger, relishing in the adorable pout it forms. All you can do is nod, eyes fluttering shut when he finally slides inside of you. The weight of him sits heavy in your cunt, the singular drive of his hips causing your clit to bump into the door. It sends a rippled shockwave throughout your body, a voluminous moan breaching past your lips. Chanhee rests his forehead on your shoulder, staying still for a moment to gather himself.
It’s not long before he’s pistoning his cock into your pussy like a sword being sheathed and unsheathed. You claw at the wall as a means of grounding yourself, inconsistently paced cries and mewls of pleasure bouncing around the room. He hikes up your leg higher, palming at your tits so he can override your senses any way he can. You’re so lightheaded and tears have begun to spring at the corners of your eyes. It feels too good.
“O-Oh my god, you’re s-so— f-fuck Chanhee,” you babble, gasping for air as he continuously punches it out of you with every inch his cock buries into you.
He’s enjoying himself too much, loving how fucked out you look. He’s reduced you to an incoherent state of being. You curve your back a bit more for him, allowing the depth at which he slips in you to go further.
Unfortunately for you, it doesn’t take much to wind you back up to that summit from previously. You’re on the brink of your second orgasm, your chest heating up and your abdomen contracting. He doesn’t let up, pinching and thumbing at a peaked nipple to egg on your release. This one feels a lot stronger than the first, your knees nearly giving out on you.
“C’mon sweetheart, that’s it,” he coaxes, stroking your hair from your face.
Chanhee fucks you through it, allotting space for you to recover before he’s knocking you onto his bed. He removes your dress entirely and rubs up and down your thighs. The exhaustion is already beginning to settle in, but you realize that he hasn’t finished not once and you’d be hitting your third at this point. You’re overstimulated and your body aches all over, but you push through.
He finds your entrance again, pressing into your cunt with more ease. You whine, smushing your cheek into the mattress. Your toes curl and you fist at the sheets, eyes all but rolling to the back of your head where you see white spots and stars coating your vision. He grips your hips to hold you still, starting to rock back into your pussy with practiced aggression. He’s carnal with his movements, but it’s careful, almost like he doesn’t really want to hurt you.
“It’s too much—“ you interrupt yourself with a wail, the tears from earlier tracking along the sides of your face.
“I’ve fucked you stupid, haven’t I? Thought I was done with you?” He strains, folding over so he can kiss the skin of your collarbone and trail up to your mouth. His lips brush yours when he talks, teasing you as if he hadn’t already fucked you within an inch of your life. “Do you think I’m having fun yet?”
Your cunt sucks him in like a vacuum, your volume rising the closer you get to what you hope is your last orgasm of the night. What you needed was the best sleep ever after this. Your brain can barely form sentences, and you struggle to give him a proper response. “Y-Yes, Cha-Chanhee— oh god— s-so much fun,”
Your breath catches in your throat when that familiar sensation reappears. Chanhee is in his own world, focused on chasing his own release. His nails dig into the fat of your thighs, thrusts becoming deeper and slower. You reach between the two of you to swipe at your clit with your middle and ring fingers, the extra stimulation tipping you over that sweet edge.
Your orgasm crests upon you with so much intensity that you can’t even make a sound. If you do, it’s so far away from you that you don’t hear it. The uncontrollable fluttering of your walls sets Chanhee’s into action, his hips stuttering with a groan that doesn’t meet your ears. He fills you up with enough cum that it begins to spill out of you in spite of his cock still plugged inside your cunt. You both take a moment to recollect your bearings, chests clashing with each rise and fall from your breathing.
After what feels like forever, he pulls out and collapses on the bed beside you, the back of his hand thrown over his forehead.
“Holy shit— I mean— wow I really— I really didn’t think you were so…” You don’t finish your thought, head still stuck on the actions you’d committed prior.
“It’s always the quiet ones.” Chanhee shrugs, sighing dramatically.
“You are not quiet,” you turn your head to give him a pointed look. “But, I’m not complaining. I got my insides rearranged six ways to Sunday. Who’s the real winner here?”
“Me, actually,” he says, his thumb caressing your cheekbone. “I’ve had the longer crush.”
“Y-You— huh?!” Your eyes practically bulge out of your head, comically wide like a deer’s caught in headlights. He laughs at your expression.
“I’ve been wanting to make a move on you since last semester,” he admits. “But I was kinda… discouraged? I guess? I feel like I’m the one who puts in too much effort all the time, with everything that I do. I wanted to see if maybe someone would do the same for me. I’m just lucky that it worked out in my favor.”
Your bottom lip juts out and you flip over to peck the tip of his nose tenderly. “Choi Chanhee, you’re extremely lucky. I almost gave up on you, like, a couple days ago.”
Chanhee’s laughter grows and he kisses you softly. “Well, I’m glad that you didn’t. Now I can take you on a real date to that space cafe. Not one that Kevin forced on us.”
“I like the sound of that.” You smile, cuddling into his side.
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© juyeonszn. do not steal, claim, or repost.
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lividstar · 28 days
Text
愤怒的星星 ★ — COLLISION OF PARALLEL LINES.
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៚ wc: 17.6k
៚ fluff, punk!hongjoong x fem!reader, slowburn, ot8 cameos, college au except idk if i did it right, mutual pining, first few parts are just flashbacks, opposites attract (kinda?) will probably be a 2-part series
៚ The thought of enjoying your Saturday morning however you please may initially seem exciting, but it can become as daunting as weekdays when you end up with tasks even on your supposed days off—which, in your case, is none other than buying a psychological thriller book for your roommate, who claims she needs it in order to share a "common interest" with the nerdy guy from her linguistics class she seems to be obsessed with. You already saw it coming when you opened your phone to find numerous missed calls from her, but what you didn't expect was a coincidental encounter with a guy who seems to have visited the bookstore for the same reason as you. It only took you two more no-longer-so-coincidental encounters for you to realize just how deep you’ve fallen into the bottomless pit.
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You never really tend to realize just how much of an effect a certain person’s presence has on you until you start to crave more of it during the times you fail to feel it around.
The first time you saw him was when you were walking in and out of your local bookstore’s aisles, fingers brushing through the rows of books neatly arranged according to their genres. For how long you’ve been doing the exact same thing, you begin to forget just why and how exactly visiting the place managed to sneak itself in between your routine for the day.
Rewinding the day’s events so far so you could recall what exactly were you doing inside a bookstore standing in front of an aisle solely for the psychological thriller genre, you vividly remember your roommate calling you in the middle of your morning stroll at the park asking if you could stop by a nearby bookstore and buy her a book she apparently needs for “academic purposes.”
You were hesitant at first, thinking she was probably airing out a false reason. With the amount of times you’d come home to the sight of her deeply engrossed in a complex thriller movie, you’d assume she wanted the book solely due to her interests.
You ran your eyes through the columns once more, sighing in relief when you finally found the book your roommate wanted you to buy. You took your phone out to take a picture of it and send it to her for confirmation, but just as you were about to reach for it, another person whose presence you failed to notice until now did so as well, making your hands brush against each other after reaching for the same book stacked in the sixth row of the shelf.
You immediately looked to the side and managed to catch a glimpse of his eyes slightly widening, and so did he with yours. You remember being the first one to snap back to reality, taking a step back to face him while waving your arms off in front of your chest.
“You can take it,” you said, awkwardly chuckling as you gestured for him to take the book instead. You figured you’d just buy a copy of it online, or if you’re going to be free on some days this week, perhaps you’d stop by other bookstores. Your roommate didn’t specify when exactly she needed the book, anyway.
He mirrors your actions instead of reaching for the book, gently pulling down the left cord of his earphones—you thought it was a subtle gesture of bouncing your initiation of small talk back to you, so you let your attention get taken away as your ears perked up to listen to whatever the stranger had to say.
“It’s fine, i’m sure you’ll need that one more than I do,” he said, pointing to the book neither of you were considering taking with a gentle smile. “I’ve actually read it five times already—just thought a sixth reread was necessary earlier in the morning, so here I am now.” He chuckled, and only then did you manage to get a good look at him.
His hair had a striking resemblance to the burgundy patterned carpets of the bookstore, and from the looks of it, you were able to tell from a single glance that it definitely wasn’t the first time he’s ever dyed his hair. Black sunglasses remained sat atop his head, and his ears were decorated in multiple piercings. He wore a layered chain necklace, the silver material of the accessories shining as the lights by the roof reflected on it. A dark red leather jacket was hung lazily over his shoulders, showing the black tank top he wore underneath. He was wearing black, ripped baggy jeans, and it was adorned with chains attached to its waistline. His combat boots were of the same color, and the shoelace of the left foot was undone—you couldn’t tell if it was on purpose or if he simply didn’t notice. He wore silver rings on almost each of his fingers, and you were able to see that one of his nails was painted black when he adjusted one of his rings. It almost made you smile, but it wasn’t until he cleared his throat that you realized you’ve been staring at him for about a minute or two.
Your eyes widened in surprise, awkwardly chuckling as you did your best not to give him the wrong impression. “Sorry, I was just...” you trailed off, not knowing what horrible excuse you should use to drag yourself out of a potentially awkward encounter. “...just wondering why you’d want to read the same book six times straight.” Great, you certainly didn’t come off weird, but you definitely sounded rude.
Just as you were about to hurriedly mutter out an apology, the man’s stifled laugh immediately put a halt to your train of thought. “It sounds strange, doesn’t it? My friends have been asking me the same question for a while now, so this isn’t really surprising for me. See, this book has a lot of foreshadowing in it, so I think It’s nice to reread it every once in a while to see the points I’ve missed.” He shrugged his shoulders, making his leather jacket fall off smoothly on one side.
He noticed you struggling with thinking of what to respond, so he took it upon himself and steered the conversation away from himself and towards you. “What about you? what were you going to buy the book for?” he asked, and you were quick to answer—thankful for his initiative.
“Going to the bookstore wasn’t originally part of today’s schedule, but apparently my roommate couldn’t get any more lazier and asked me to stop by to purchase the book for her because she can’t do it herself.”
There was something about the way you expressed your frustration (although jokingly) with a deadpanning look on your face that almost made him want to laugh, and you could tell by the way he was visibly fighting against the corners of his lips that were twitching upwards.
“That’s tough,” he stated the obvious as he ran his jewelry adorned fingers through his burgundy hair—with the way you saw a line of sweat drip down by the side of his face, you knew you weren’t the only one who found the bookstore to be in a strangely warm temperature today.
You saw a few air conditioners here and there on the walls, and they were working perfectly fine earlier, so you assumed they were probably just malfunctioning. “Are the air conditioners going through a malfunction or something?” he voiced out your thoughts for you as he practically asked himself the question with the way it came out as a whisper while he was looking around.
You took your cardigan off, and only then did you notice the stark contrast between your choices of outfits. You were clad in a pink knitted cardigan your mother made by her own hands—she gave it to you as a present for Christmas a while ago, and underneath it was a white camisole top decorated with lace and a pink ribbon on its center—something you added yourself. You wore a long, white ruffled skirt, a piece of clothing you bought online two years ago when you and your online best friend agreed upon buying it together to wear it the moment you’ll finally get the chance to meet up. You stopped talking to each other a year ago, so you just started to wear it to your own liking. You chose to wear the pink doll shoes you found at a thrift store a week ago, and the cherry on top was the white ribbon hair clips you placed on either side of your hair.
“They were doing just fine when I first came in, so I guess it has something to do with technical issues.” You shrugged, and the man mirrored your actions yet again as he proceeded to fully take off his leather jacket as well.
Just as he parted his lips to say something, your phone suddenly rang, making both of you look at the device you didn’t even notice you were still holding in your hands until now. Staring right into your eyes was your roommate’s caller id on the phone screen, and for a second, you were debating whether to answer or not.
You decided to ignore the latter, figuring the call was made regarding the book. You apologetically smiled at the man first, gesturing to your phone as he returned your smile, urging you to go ahead as he mouths something about checking out other sections of the book store so you could have some privacy.
Once he was out of the frame, you didn’t hesitate to press the green button, bringing the phone up to your ears. “Before I proceed to say anything, I need you to answer a question of mine first. Do you think you’re capable of committing murder today?” She asked from the other end of the line, making your brows furrow as you scoffed in both confusion and disbelief at the sudden confusion. “Am I what?”
“Please just say yes or no,” she said in a hurried tone. “No... why? Did something bad happen over there?” She chuckled nervously as you heard the shuffling of bedsheets, assuming she was either rolling around her bed or sitting up.
“No, but... you see, about the book I asked for you to buy... remember that guy from my linguistics class I told you about last weekend?” You were confused about where the conversation was heading, yet hummed in confirmation anyway. “I do. What about him?”
“Okay, so, thanks to my... connections, I found out just now that he owns an annotated physical copy of the book, and, if you’re already catching my drift...” she trailed off, yet the moment she heard your sigh from your end, she was quick to regain composure and stumble over her words.
“I’m sorry! I’m really sorry! I wouldn’t have sneaked the task in between your schedule if I had known beforehand—I just really don’t want to waste the opportunity of a potential connection between us... and, I mean, well, yeah, I should’ve done it by myself to begin with, but I wasn’t really thinking straight earlier in the morning so I—” you cut her off by ending the call, heading straight to your messages as you scrolled down to look for her contact number.
The sound of your nails clicking on the phone screen echoed across the empty aisle as you typed, “Go shoot your shot. Don’t stress it out, alright? Just make sure this won’t happen again. Love you :)” With a sigh, you turned your phone off and put it back inside your bag. You were happy for your roommate, yet at the same time, you couldn’t help but feel like you just wasted a portion of your day.
Exiting the aisle, your thoughts went back to the man you were just engaging in small talk with a few minutes ago, eyes darting around the bookstore to search for him. You didn’t see which direction he went when he left, already having your back turned against him the moment you heard his fading footsteps.
The man sitting by the register who seemed to be around the same age as you noticed you and was quick to call for your attention. “Are you looking for the redhead, miss?” And for a second, you were slightly embarrassed, but it was the truth, anyway, so you found yourself nodding wordlessly. “He already left a minute ago.”
Hearing those words come out of his mouth, you almost let a disappointed sigh slip out of your lips, but you were quick to cover it up. “I see. Thanks for telling me,” you said, flashing him a polite smile as he gave you his own.
Figuring there was no longer any purpose for you to stay inside the bookstore any longer, you headed to the exist, the clinking of the bells on top of the doors ringing in your ears as you swung it open, putting your cardigan back on when the cold temperature of the city hit your skin like a speeding truck. Only then did you realize you didn’t even get to ask for his name, and since then, he hadn’t left your mind for the rest of the day.
The next time wasn’t any different. You were taking a stroll at the park for a much-needed unwinding after taking your exams. Kids were running around and chasing each other by the grassy fields, couples were being all cute and cuddly as they sat by the benches, and some elderly people were walking around much like how you were, admiring the beautiful sceneries unfolding in front of their very own eyes.
Your pink dress was being carried away by the soft breeze, making it flow as you took one step after another. Thankfully, you chose to wear a long dress for the day, so you didn’t have to worry about any potential wardrobe malfunctions.
From a near distance, you saw a little boy standing by the grass fields pointing towards you. His voice was a little loud, so you managed to hear what he was saying to the two men he was with. “Wooyoung-hyung, look! A princess!”
The little boy’s comment caught you off guard, making you look the other way as you pretended not to hear the words he was saying, which were hard to ignore due to how loud he was speaking. “Kyungmin, she’s not a princess, and you can’t just point to strangers like that!”
The man who you assumed to be his older brother lightly scolded him, and for a second, you were debating between playing along with the child’s wide imagination—it wasn’t his fault for thinking you were a princess as he was still young, after all, or fleeing from the park so his attention would be directed to something else so his brother would stop scolding him. “But she is a princess! Seonghwa-hyung, you see it too, right?” The other man with them was probably a friend of the little boy’s brother.
“Well, Kyungmin, she might look like one, but she isn’t—” the man you assumed to be Seonghwa stopped in between his words all of a sudden, and the next thing you knew was the little boy was standing right in front of you, tugging on your dress that was still flowing due to the wind.
“Kyungmin!” Both men yelled his name in unison, but he ignored them, his attention fully focused on you instead. “Miss pretty lady! You’re a princess, right? Right?” He looked up at you with a smile, and once again, you found yourself ignoring the latter between your choices of how to handle the situation.
You sat down so you could see each other eye to eye, a fond smile spreading across your face as you let out a soft laugh. “You think I’m a princess?” You tilted your head, making him let out a gasp of disbelief. “But you are! Wooyoung-hyung and Seonghwa-hyung won’t believe me, but I know you are! Right?” he asked for confirmation again, making you laugh once more as you rested your hands on the area of your chest where your heart was.
“Well… I think it depends on what you want to believe. I won’t tell you whether I’m a princess or not, but if you think I am, then so be it. What you believe in is what matters the most, and not what anyone else does, don’t you think?”
You figured talking some wisdom into a boy who’s probably still in kindergarten wasn’t exactly the best way to handle the situation, but it’s not like you knew better ways. Seeing his smile grow even wider after hearing your words, though, was enough to let you know you handled it just fine. “So you are a princess! I knew it!” Okay, well, that was definitely not the reaction you were going for, but at least he’s happy, right?
“You should tell them that, too!” He pointed to where his brother and his friend stood, but this time, there were three of them, and the one standing in the middle was definitely not an unfamiliar face to you contrary to the two who stood by his side. You certainly couldn’t have been mistaken—especially not when you saw his burgundy hair.
Your eyes met briefly, yours widened and his completely normal, save for the fond gaze you assumed was probably directed to the little boy in front of you. He probably didn’t even recognize you at all. “Come with me, miss pretty lady! You should meet them so they’ll be proven wrong,” he said, reaching for your arm as he took a step towards where the three men stood.
When you didn’t budge from where you crouched at all, he looked back at you with a confused expression on his face. “What’s the matter, miss pretty lady?”
You chuckled awkwardly as you stood up, looking down at him. “They’re waiting for you, not me. Go on now, don’t keep them waiting. I’m sure you’ve proven them wrong already, anyway,” you said, using your free hand to take his off your wrist. “Are you sure? I…”
“Kyungmin!” His older brother called out his name once more, making his head turn to where they were all standing, patiently waiting for the little boy to go back to them. “See? You should go.” You ushered, making him look back and forth between you and his brother and his friends for about a few seconds.
“Well… okay, then.” The frown on his face was a huge contrast to the huge smile he once had a few seconds ago, and you were quick to do whatever you could to bring it back.
“Hey, don’t be sad, alright? It’s always better to spend days like this with a smile on your face,” you said, smiling at him fondly. “Will I get to see you again?” The sudden question put you at a loss for words, and you spent a good couple of seconds thinking of how to respond correctly.
“Neither of us know the answer to that, but if you ever see me again, I promise I’ll let you introduce me to your brother and his friends, okay?” It was definitely not the right thing to say, but it was certainly what the boy wanted to hear.
With the smile on his face returning, he waved at you enthusiastically, running back to the three men who have been waiting for him for quite a while now. He approached them with a cheerful expression on his face, and you watched them slowly start to smile as well while the little boy told them about his interaction with you.
Unbeknownst to you, your attention was unconsciously directed towards the burgundy haired man who was now exchanging laughter with his friends while the little boy was still going on about his story. This time, he was wearing a see-through black jacket with a beige compression long-sleeve shirt underneath, partnered with baggy denim jeans that were secured by a black belt with embellishments. His ears had less piercings this time, and so were the amount of necklaces he wore. His boots were the same as the ones you saw him wear when you first met him, and his fingers were still adorned with multiple accessories. You could tell he opted for a casual look today, yet he still looked as cool as ever. Perhaps it was due to the vibe he carries with him, and not just his choices of clothing itself. There’s still a huge contrast between your outfits.
The little boy didn’t mention his name when he was talking to you earlier, and that was the only thing you were disappointed about with your heartwarming interaction with him. You’d probably look strange if you were to approach them, yet it proved to be impossible either way as they now had their backs faced towards you, walking away as they continued their conversation. Luck really hasn’t been on your side lately. You wonder when it will be.
Three weeks later, and you’re now walking through the halls in search of your roommate. Thirty minutes ago, she sent you a message, telling you to meet her on the third floor. She didn’t really tell you why, and it drove you off the edge more than it should’ve—one thing you’ve always disliked was when people would ask you to meet up for an unspecified reason, or even worse, message you by texting you only your name and your name alone without telling you what’s the matter beforehand. So now, here you were, eyes searching the halls in hopes of finding a familiar face.
“Hey!” A familiar voice called out a few steps behind where you stood, making you immediately look back. Sighing in relief as you recognized who it was, your roommate made her way towards you, pushing past the small portion of people crowding the halls. “Sorry for asking to meet up all of a sudden—I know you hate it when I do this, but I promise this is the last time!” So was last week, you said in your thoughts.
“What’s this about, anyway? And it better not be about your crush from your linguistics class because I swear—” She cuts you off with an apologetic chuckle, making you sigh in disappointment. “Nope, I’m not doing it.”
Just as you were about to walk away, she held your arm to keep you steady in your place, desperately pleading as she shook your arm repeatedly. “Please, please just hear me out! I promise I’ll leave you alone after this!” No way in hell you would, you thought once again.
Still, you chose to hear her out anyway. Sure, she may be annoying at times—especially when it comes to her undying crush on the boy from her linguistics class, but you can’t really deny the fact that you hold a soft spot for her deep within. When it wasn’t about her man who technically isn’t her man but you’re sure will be her man one day, she was really fun to be around. She was loud and outgoing, a huge contrast to your calm and collected personality, and as different as you both may be, you feel the most comfortable around her compared to anyone and everyone else. Whenever she’d notice you were feeling down, she wouldn’t hesitate to speedrun to the nearest convenience store by where you both lived, buy you your favorite food even during the times her pockets are begging for her to leave them alone for once, and put on your favorite movie once she comes back.
So then, you now find yourself heading towards the library to look for yet another book her crush has apparently been frequently visiting the library for lately. You figured you should hire whoever’s airing all this information to her as your detective one day, if it ever came to it.
Apparently, the book is a tale as old as time, so he couldn’t really find a copy of it anywhere, hence why he chooses to visit the library on a daily basis to read it. Your roommate thought sharing the same interests with him would be a great way to deepen her “connection” with him—if they even had one to begin with, considering how the only bridge between both of them was the annotated book she borrowed from him—which she still hasn’t returned—and that was pretty much all of it. She claims she’s too shy to approach him, and maybe that’s why.
You found yourself standing in between two tall bookshelves once again, the situation being somewhat familiar to you in a way that almost made you laugh. This time, though, the air conditioners were working just fine, and you weren’t accompanied by a presence other than your own.
Your eyes search through the books neatly stacked in the shelves, squinting and inching closer to get a better view in case you accidentally miss the book you’re looking for. There was a blank space in between two books, and for a moment, you assume the book had already been borrowed by your roommate’s crush, or maybe someone else.
You were about to message your roommate to tell her about it, until you heard some shuffling from the other side of the shelf you were facing, drawing a confused expression on your face. You heard from one of your colleagues that the librarian was way too strict for everyone’s liking, so students would mostly stop by the library just to borrow a book, but never to actually stay.
Which student was brave enough to actually stop by the library to read? Wouldn’t they be at least a little scared to be yelled at to shut up over the smallest of things such as breathing like how a normally functioning person should?
Peeking through the empty space in between the books to see who it was, your eyes widened comically as you recognized the person solely from their hands resting on the table alone. The sight of a singularly colored nail and layers of rings and bracelets couldn’t have been more familiar to you.
But what was he doing here? His hair was half blonde and half black, though, so you were contemplating whether your assumptions about his identity were correct or not, but you knew there was only one way to find out—and it certainly wasn’t peeking through a bookshelf like a creep.
Exiting the aisle—a familiar experience once again, you slowly walked towards the table while rethinking your life decisions, wondering if you should just leave him alone and mind your own business. You were on the brink of considering it, but it wasn’t until you recognized what he was reading.
It was the book your roommate asked you to borrow from the library, and it was certainly the one meant to be placed in the blank space by the aisle you were searching through just now.
Your mind was racing with questions pleading to be answered—the first ones being, Who the hell is this man? Why do I keep seeing him around? Why did no one ever tell me he goes to the same university as I do? And what is his name?
You figured there couldn’t have been a better time for your questions to be answered other than now, and even if you were gambling with the possibilities of him either recognizing you or not feeling any sense of familiarity with you at all, you couldn’t really care less right now.
“Hey,” you were hesitant, making your voice come off as soft and barely above a whisper—and it certainly wasn’t due to your fear of being scolded by the librarian. The man shot up and immediately turned his head around, and as he stared at you with those eyes of his, you knew your assumptions regarding his identity were correct, after all.
For about a second or two, all he did was stare at you with a blank expression on his face, and you swore you were about to let the ground swallow you whole right there and then. But for the next second, his face softens as he flashes you a toothy grin, and the words that soon followed after it caught you completely off guard. “It’s you.” It’s you?
What on Earth could he have possibly meant by that? Does that mean he recognized you when his friend’s little brother was talking to you within a fair distance from where he and his friends stood by the park, after all? Does that mean he remembers? “I was starting to think I’d stop seeing you around. Turns out we’re closer than I thought we would be.” Okay, what?
“What?” You voice out your thoughts by accident, tilting your head in confusion as all he did in return was smile at you once more. “Third time’s the charm, after all, isn’t it?” He closes the book laid out in front of him on the table, pulling out the chair beside him, tapping on it as he gestured for you to take a seat.
You do so wordlessly, awkwardly fiddling with a loose stitch of your white knitted sweater adorned with baby pink strawberry patterns. How come you’ve never seen him around? With a face as strikingly beautiful as his, you’re sure you would’ve already noticed him long ago—or maybe you were just looking at the wrong places all along.
“He still thinks you’re a princess, you know.” He rests his elbow on the table, placing his chin on his hand as he looks at you with a smile. “Who?”
“Kyungmin—the little boy from the park, remember?” That was all it took for you to put two and two together and realize what he was talking about, making you let out a hum of realization, nodding soon after. “He hasn’t stopped talking to us about it, especially Wooyoung, since he’s his older brother and he’s pretty much the only one out of all of us who keeps on breaking his little bubble of imagination.”
The conversation flowed through more smoothly than you expected a few seconds ago, and the next thing you knew was you were stifling a chuckle, careful not to drive the librarian mad—actually, was she even still around right now? He was practically speaking in a normal tone and not in hushed whispers, so he should’ve been told off by now already. But he isn’t.
“It was a little hard trying to convince him to go back to you and your friends, honestly…” you said, rubbing the back of your neck as he chuckled at your response.
“Kids and their imaginations never fail to impress me. You know, when we went to the park again last night, he kept crying because he couldn’t see you anywhere. He said you promised you’d let him introduce you to us once you both meet each other again, so he was really upset. It was adorable, though.”
You found yourself smiling as you imagined the little boy crying in the arms of his brother due to not seeing you around, this time being the one chuckling.
“I didn’t mean to leave him hanging off by my words… I hope it wasn’t too much for your friend to handle his tantrums,” you said, smiling apologetically. He waves his arms off in front of his chest—another action appearing to be somehow familiar to you. “Don’t feel bad about it. Pretty sure Wooyoung’s used to it by now,” he responded, shrugging afterwards. He was right, the boy was his friend’s younger brother, after all.
Finding both yourselves at a loss for another topic to discuss, you opted for the first thing that came up in your head. “You changed your hair color,” you stated the obvious, rushing over to make a follow-up statement in order not to look stupid, “it suits you.”
But only after voicing it out did you realize that perhaps maybe leaving your first statement as it is would’ve been a better option. Unbeknownst to you, heat immediately flushed through his cheeks, but he was quick to cover it up, making you fail to notice the way your words made his breath hitch for a slight second. “You think so?”
“W-Well, yeah. Burgundy looked just as great, though.” It was a huge lie, though. Sure, burgundy looked good on him and suited his style pretty well, but a split-dyed hair look is always a hit or miss.
For him to make it look this good, though, definitely proved to you that it’s a hit—a rare one. Even so, you were just glad you managed to save yourself from embarrassment, playing off the fact that you literally just complimented a stranger.
But with the way you’ve been thinking of him ever since you first touched each other’s hands by accident at the bookstore, was he really still a mere stranger to you at this point?
He found himself smiling at your comment, fiddling with the rings on his fingers like how you were doing with your sweater just a while ago. “Thanks, I definitely needed to hear that.” With his response, you looked at him in confusion, subtly asking for context. He was quick to catch on, bracing himself for a little bit of a story time.
“My roommates have been flaming me ever since I came home with the red dye all gone, asking me if my hairstylist ran out of bleach in the middle of the process. They’ve been teasing me about how my scalp is probably begging to be freed by the shackles of my stylist at this point, too.” You then ended up thinking about it as well. Just how many times has this man changed his hair color by now?
“Wanna take a guess?” You didn’t need further explanation from him in order to know what he was talking about, as you’ve already been pondering about it anyway.
“I’ll say… five times, maybe?” If the correct answer was to go way past that, you think you’ll end up having the same thoughts as his roommates by the end of the day. “I hate to be the bearer of the bad news, but the answer’s very far from that.” Oh.
Seeing the flabbergasted expression on your face, he laughed loudly, and only then were your suspicions about the librarian no longer being around confirmed. If she was, he’d be thrown out the window by now. “Surprising, isn’t it? I don’t know how my scalp is still holding out well until now, either.” He shrugged, and about a couple of seconds after, you ended up joining him on his fit of laughter as well.
“I gotta say, though, that’s really impressive. Anyone else would be bald by now,” you said, making him laugh once more with how you voiced out your thoughts in such a serious tone. His laughter died down after a little while, eyes now staring right into yours. “What brings you here, though?” He finally brought it up, making you wordlessly point to the closed book in front of where he sat by the table.
“Take a guess. It’s not any different from last time,” you said, and he was quick to piece your words together. “Your roommate?” You nodded, mimicking his actions as you rested your chin on your hands like how he did earlier.
Right now, he was lazily slouched on the chair, one arm of his placed on the table as the other was resting on his thigh. He seemed to be comfortable. Only then did you manage to look at him completely from head to toe.
The contrast between your choices of clothing remained the same as ever, so you weren’t really surprised at this point. For you, beneath your white knitted sweater was a pink lace camisole top, paired with a short, pink frilly skirt. Along with your pink doll shoes—one that was different from what you wore when you went to the bookstore a while ago, was a pair of knee-length lace socks with pink ribbons resting atop its garter. And lastly, for your hairstyle, you decided to go for a simpler look today, with half of it tied up and adorned with a large pink ribbon hair clip.
For him, you noticed he looked simpler than how he’d usually style himself. But then again, you’ve only ever seen him twice before today, so you were not one to talk. He wore an oversized black shirt with a simple red graphic design in front, and it was tucked in his black denim cargo jeans that were held up by an equally simple black belt, partnered up with glossy black boots that were shining every time he’d move his feet around due to the lights by the roof of the library reflecting on its shiny surface. He was only wearing one necklace today, but as always, his hands were clad in multiple accessories. A cap, which you assumed he was probably wearing earlier before you found him, remained sat on his lap. When he ran his right hand through his hair, the sleeve of his oversized shirt went down a little, giving you the chance to catch a glimpse of his tattoo that says, “NO 1 LIKE ME.”
Once again, you failed to see the corners of his lips twitching upward when he noticed your eyes raking over his form, eyes twinkling in amusement. You’ve only seen each other thrice, but for each time that you did, something that would never overlook his attention was the way you’d always examine his clothing. It was cute, though. And it’s not like he doesn’t do the exact same thing every time as well, anyway.
His smirk disappeared as quick as the speed of light the moment your eyes met his, making you avert your gaze immediately. It’s not like you were uncomfortable, but rather because his eyes just hold such an intense aura within them that never fails to make you feel intimidated—in a good way, you assume.
“You know,” you began to speak, although still refusing to meet his eyes, “I still don’t know what your name is, and we’ve crossed paths three times already…” Due to the lack of a response from him, you were quick to assume you were probably overstepping a few lines.
What if he doesn’t really want your connection with each other to go way past two people who coincidentally see each other in the most random circumstances and places? What if he liked things better this way—you not knowing his name, and him not knowing yours?
But your thoughts dissolved into nothingness the moment he finally spoke up, his voice a little softer than you could recall as he says, “Kim Hongjoong.” Of course his name is just as beautiful as he is. Were you really surprised at this point?
“Kim Hongjoong,” you let his name roll off your tongue, and something you failed to notice yet again due to how you were still refusing to face him was the way his breath hitched—again. “What about you?”
He was quick to come up with a question to ask in order to keep his composure, head tilting ever so slightly, secretly anticipating for you to turn your head towards him again. And it seems luck chose to be on his side today, with the way you did exactly what he wished for you to.
“Me?” You asked, and he nodded. “Yeah, you.” You were hesitant at first—once you and Hongjoong finally exchange your names with each other, there’s no guarantee of which direction your affiliation with him would lead to.
Sure, you may have been overanalyzing things a little—maybe he’s just asking for your name with the hopes of being friends, but even so, you couldn’t help but wonder where you were both headed, because even if you were only a potential friend to him, he certainly wasn’t one for you.
You knew the risks of dating way before you even first entered college two years ago. If anyone were to wish for a relationship, the best periods of time to do so would either be in high school or adulthood. High school’s for the cheesy moments, the sneakily exchanged glances during class, the chasing each other by the fields, the heartfelt confessions during prom night. You’d break up with each other over something childish yet would be serious if you were to be at the age of a high school student, and you’d forget all about it the moment you step into your college life.
Getting into a relationship once you have grown into an adult would be the best option out of all, because as we grow older, we learn more things about life each day. Relationships during high school are ruined pretty easily usually because of how both parties aren’t emotionally mature enough to handle conflicts, and such an occurrence can be easily avoided if you’re both functioning adults with a better perspective on most things in life. It’d certainly be more mature compared to the aforementioned.
But relationships during college aren’t exactly the brightest of all. College students are around the ages where all you’d ever want is to mess around and have fun no matter the cost knowing you’ll barely ever get the chance to do so once you step into adulthood. So, with that being said, relationships being taken seriously by college students isn’t really a common occurrence. They live to fuck around and find out, and that’s all that’s there to it. You’ve seen girls getting their hearts shattered left and right by stupid men who seem to only think with their hormones, and you know how bad it gets.
From struggling to balance their studies and relationships to completely losing focus on their goals because apparently a conventionally attractive yet emotionally unintelligent man is worth crying over more than great examination results were, all you know about college relationships is that it either plays out surprisingly well and lasts long, or it could initiate the beginning of your downfall for years on end. You swore you’d never try it out, afraid to end up being part of the latter.
But as hard as relationships during college seem, resisting your undeniable attraction towards the man sitting in front of you also proved to be just as difficult with the way all you could think about at the very moment was how those soft hands of his clicking on the table while patiently awaiting your response would feel against your skin. It wasn’t much of a surprise for you, anyway—you knew you were doomed the moment your eyes first met his in an empty aisle and you ended up staring at him longer than you should’ve.
You knew there was no point in considering the pros and cons of deepening your connection with someone who wasn’t meant to play a role of just a friend and nothing more in your life—and might I add, someone you’re heavily crushing on yet would rather jump off a cliff than admit it to yourself and accept the terms, knowing even if he asked for your name that day at the park or that one time in the bookstore, you would’ve given him what he wanted with zero hesitation anyway.
And so you do.
He proceeded to mirror your actions from earlier, rolling your name out of his tongue—and you swear your name hasn’t sounded so beautiful until now. “That’s a beautiful name you’ve got,” he starts, and when you finally gained enough courage to turn your head to the side and meet his eyes, you were met with that toothy grin of his you didn’t seem to be able to get enough of, “it suits you pretty well.”
“Oh, I—” You weren’t sure whether to be thankful for your friend for saving you from embarrassing yourself over not knowing how to react to Hongjoong’s unprovoked compliment, or to completely loathe her for cutting in between your conversation with him once again.
You’ve been getting deja vu over the parallels between everything that’s been happening right now that has already happened before although under a different situation way too often it’s actually starting to make your head hurt.
The loud ringing of your phone echoed around the empty library, and once again, you found yourself contemplating between pressing the green button or the red one. But not this time, no. You figured she’s probably calling to ask you whether you’ve borrowed the old book from the library yet, and that’s a question you were capable of answering either through text or personally, so you clicked on the red button, hearing Hongjoong let out a confused hum. “Why’d you decline?”
Because I’m feeling selfish right now and couldn’t care less about my roommate and her linguistics crush, especially not when you’re sitting right in front of me looking so breathtakingly beautiful like you’re an angel from an art museum that came to life and escaped to taste the wonders of life, was what was begging to escape from the pit of your mouth, “It’s probably about the book, so I’ll just talk to her in person later,” was all that came out.
And with the way he looked at you as if he was waiting for you to say something else, you knew he knew of your thoughts. Thankfully, he was kind enough not to bring it up. Or he probably didn’t notice at all. Truth be told, you’re hoping the latter was the case.
“What’s up with your roommate and books, anyway?” He asked curiously, although you could tell there was a hint of playfulness with the way he spoke. “You mean what’s up with her crush from her linguistics class and books?” You shrugged, holding back your laughter when you noticed his eyebrows shoot upward ever so slightly with his mouth agape.
“Oh. So that’s what it’s about, huh?” You let out an exasperated sigh, faking a frustrated expression as you responded, “Unfortunately so.”
Classes had already ended a few minutes ago, but students were still allowed to stay in the library afterwards—at first, you thought the implemented policy was stupid at first, seeing how literally no one ever visits the library, but now, you find yourself being grateful for it.
You both sat beside each other as silence surrounded both of you, but it wasn’t the kind of silence that would drive you on the edge and make you hurriedly think of what you should do or say in order to dissipate the looming tension, no. The silence between you and Hongjoong was comfortable. He wasn’t demanding you to speak, and neither were you. But just as the silence was starting to grow deeper, you were drowning in an ocean of your own thoughts again—specifically, thoughts about Hongjoong.
You weren’t sure when it happened or if you were the one who moved or if it was him, but the distance between both of you was now smaller than how it was a few minutes ago—you were sitting so close beside each other you’d occasionally feel the fabric of his jeans brush against your thigh whenever either of you would move. Since he was now closer, the scent of his cedarwood perfume engulfed you completely. You thought it made perfect sense for someone like him to favor such a scent—it suits him pretty well.
Every now and then, you’d steal a few glances from your peripheral vision while he remains engrossed in his phone, chewing the inside of your cheek whenever you’d find yourself wondering what it would feel like to rest your head on those shoulders of his. You were wondering what it feels like to rest your head on those shoulders of his?
And since you’re way too focused on not making yourself too obvious, you, as usual, fail to notice him doing the exact same thing as well. He was scrolling on his phone, sure, but in reality, he wasn’t even reading any of the posts that were appearing on his feed, way too focused on the way your eyelashes would flutter so beautifully whenever you’d blink.
The awkward smile you gave him when you first met each other in the bookstore is an image he had taken a mental photograph of, the memory still lingering in the back of his head clearly. The first thing he noticed about you that day was the way almost all of the pieces of clothing you wore were adorned in ribbons, as it reminded him of himself, in a way.
But instead of ribbons, anyone could find more than a handful of silver chains attached to almost everything in his closet. You seemed to love wearing knitted sweaters and cardigans, much like how half of his wardrobe consisted of leather jackets in varying designs and colors, though most of them were black, just like how most of yours were pink. It’s amusing to him how you two were so similar yet so different all the same.
The day he went to the park with Wooyoung, Seonghwa, and Wooyoung’s little brother, Kyungmin, he wasn’t really any different from you. You’d never know of it much like the other way around, but even when he went to the park with the same purpose you had, he couldn’t get you off his mind. It was as if his mind was the shore, and you were the waves of the ocean constantly pushing forward after being pulled away by the tides.
So, when he came back to where Seonghwa and Wooyoung were after separating himself from them for a while to look for less crowded areas of the park they could go to, to say he was surprised to see you talking to Kyungmin would be nothing short of a huge understatement.
“What’s Kyungmin doing over there?” he asked Seonghwa and Wooyoung, to which one only laughed at while the other sighed. “He kept on insisting that the girl he’s talking to right now is a princess and wouldn’t let me hear the end of it when I told him she isn’t. Then he ran off, and the next thing we both knew was he’s already tugging on her dress.” Hongjoong’s gaze went back to you, who was now crouching to face Kyungmin eye to eye.
It wasn’t exactly like he could blame the little boy for thinking that way—you did look like a princess, especially with the beautiful dress you chose to wore that day, and not to mention, the natural look of your face he was sure people under the influence—and even those who aren’t—would mistaken as one that belongs to an angel gracing the Earth with her presence.
He couldn’t believe his very own eyes that day. When he left you by yourself when you had to answer a phone call in the bookstore, he was originally supposed to head back to the aisle you were at after checking out the other sections that seemed interesting enough to grab his attention, but just as he was about to, another one of his friends (a.k.a roommates) along with Seonghwa and Wooyoung, Mingi, messaged him, telling him to come home as soon as possible because Yunho burnt the kitchen while trying to remake a recipe he saw on his feed.
At first, he thought they were just messing around with him—a normal occurrence, at this point, but it wasn’t until Yeosang sent a video of the kitchen actually burning to their group chat. Hongjoong could no longer afford to go through all the five stages of grief looking for an apartment that would suffice for eight people, so he immediately left the bookstore and ran faster than the speed of light.
Just as he was about to cross the street the moment the lights for vehicles turned red, he started contemplating between quickly heading back to the bookstore just to bid you farewell or just heading straight to his apartment building. His phone vibrated once again, and his lockscreen was being flooded by notifications of his roommates spamming his DMs, most of them coming from Jongho and San. Only then did the answer become clear to him.
Fortunately, he was able to fix the fifth problem his roommates have created for the week on time, immediately proceeding to scold all of them, save for Seonghwa who just got home from buying groceries and was now cleaning up the kitchen. For a fleeting moment, his mind drifts back to you, making him scold the six men even more than he should’ve, not-so-slightly upset over the fact that they timed burning the kitchen perfectly right when Hongjoong was just about to head back to you and continue your conversation.
Later that night, they were messaging one another one by one privately, each of them all saying the same thing: “It wasn’t really that deep. What got him so riled up?” But not even Hongjoong himself knew the answer to the question he never knew they were thinking of.
He thought he wasn’t going to see you again, and it never failed to make him feel confused whenever he found himself being a little too disappointed over it. So, when he saw you again—talking to his friend’s little brother, if anything, he was at a loss for both words and thoughts. The moment Kyungmin pointed to where he, Wooyoung, and Seonghwa stood, your eyes met for a fleeting second, and with the way he saw your eyes widen ever so slightly, he felt a little too happy over you recognizing him, so he did the first thing he thought of—trying to look as unbothered as possible even though his heart was literally spinning around, begging to be freed.
He failed to realize how smiling at you would’ve been a better option until he saw the way the corners of your lips went downwards ever so slightly upon seeing the look on his face, and before he could even clear things up by waving at you or literally anything to make sure you know he knows you, your gaze was already back on Kyungmin, and by the looks of it, you didn’t seem like you wanted to look his way yet again. To be fair, neither would he.
And as usual, he still couldn’t get you off his mind that day—though this time, it was worse, especially with the realization over the fact that he could’ve walked up to you yet didn’t dawning over him. He was beyond frustrated, to say the least. So, so frustrated he couldn’t even sleep.
Figuring his emotions were way too all over the place for him to be able to fall into a deep slumber, he sat up with a groan, stumbling over with his steps as he went to the living room, finding Yunho sitting by himself on the couch while watching a film that seemed to be a coming of age romance movie.
“What are you all up and about for?” Hongjoong walked around the couch, sitting beside Yunho as the cushion underneath him sank. “I could ask you the same question, you know,” Yunho responded, not even sparing Hongjoong a glance, obviously way too focused on the movie playing on the television screen in front of him.
“Just frustrated over some things.” Hongjoong leaned against the couch, sighing as he initiated a staring contest with the ceiling. With this, Yunho was quick to reach for the remote, pausing the movie before shuffling around so he could face Hongjoong while sitting down. “What’s the matter?”
“Do you ever think about something so often it starts to make you feel frustrated?” His question had Yunho pondering for about a while, making him think about it thoroughly.
“Depends on what this “something” we’re talking about is. I’m pretty sure that would mean two different things, depending on whether it’s “something” or “someone,” so which one of the two is it?” Hongjoong was hoping Yunho wouldn’t bring it up, but oh well. If he’s screwed, then he’s screwed.
All he had to do was stare right into Yunho’s eyes, hoping he’d put two and two together—and luckily, he did. “Since when?” Yunho was surprised, given how Hongjoong isn’t exactly the type of person who’d let himself be bothered by such things. Still, he wanted Hongjoong to tell him all about it, thankful he trusts him enough to do so.
“I don’t know, honestly. We just met by coincidence in the bookstore a few blocks away about a few weeks ago, and I haven’t been able to go through a single day without my head being filled with thousands of thoughts ever since then.”
“By coincidence?” Yunho tilted his head, and Hongjoong was quick to rewind and tell him all about it. After Hongjoong was done telling him about how it started and how it’s going so far, Yunho found himself smiling, already knowing what was up with Hongjoong, while he himself was still left in the dark.
He resorted to convincing Hongjoong to get up and do all the work himself so he’d be the one to come to terms about his feelings first-hand. “You know, nothing’s gonna happen if you keep on refusing to make a move. You can’t just expect your paths to cross once again if you’ve been staying at the same spot for days on end.”
And that was when he messaged Wooyoung privately once he was back in his room, asking if he was free to hang out for the upcoming day and if he wouldn’t mind tagging Kyungmin along with him. You’ll never know he was the reason behind Kyungmin’s second visit to the park, and part of him thinks things will be better off that way.
However, both of you were going through your own predicaments unconsciously. Until now, you still don’t know why you’re thinking of resting your head on his shoulder, and in his case, he still doesn’t know why on Earth he actually debated between bidding you farewell or saving his apartment from its impending doom.
It didn’t help how you weren’t really one to open up to people, so you were left all alone trying to fix the tangled wires inside your head, unlike Hongjoong, who was blessed enough by the gods to have a friend like Yunho. Still, despite being provided moral support and advice, he wasn’t any less oblivious to his feelings than you were.
“What’s it like?” You asked all of a sudden, surprising both Hongjoong and yourself. Much to your surprise, though, Hongjoong let the blooming conversation flow freely as he said in response, “What do you mean?” You shrugged, fiddling with yet another loose stitch of your sweater—you figured you’d definitely have to fix it up once you get home later.
“You know… having a lot of roommates.” You weren’t sure why you were asking about his roommates when you could’ve asked a question about him instead, yet you were blissfully unaware of the fact that Hongjoong was more than happy to hear you ask about his roommates—his best friends.
“It’s fun on most days, yet it’s also very frustrating sometimes. Living with seven people doesn’t exactly sound like the best experience when you’re living in an apartment that can barely fit all of you—even more when more than half of us have proven themselves deserving to be banned from the kitchen.” You laughed at his words, his laughter soon following after, watching you attempting to wind down your voice with a toothy grin on his face. “Why’s that?” You managed to ask in between your stifled laughs.
“Remember when we first met?” How could you ever forget? “Yeah, what about it?” You tilted your head, wondering what your first encounter had to do with Hongjoong’s roommates burning their kitchen. “While you were on a phone call with someone, I was in the middle of checking out the other sections, but just as I was about to head back to where you were, they spammed our group chat with messages, each of them telling me to head back home as soon as possible. Wanna guess why?”
“Please don’t tell me someone actually set the kitchen on fire.” Hongjoong only laughed in response, shaking his head. “Unfortunately.” Your eyes widened slightly, scoffing in disbelief. “You’re lying, aren’t you?” This time, it was now Hongjoong’s turn to look at you in utter disbelief, making you think he was actually offended over you not believing his story for a split second.
“Don’t wanna believe me? Here,” he said, showing you the video waiting to be played on his phone screen as he gestured for you to press the button yourself. As the video started playing, a look of shock spread all over your face as you watched the fire get worse as the video progressed, hearing screams from people whom you could only assume were his roommates.
Someone draped a towel over the flames, hurriedly stepping back when his solution turned out to be an additional problem with the way the fire grew even more. “Mingi, are you fucking stupid?! Take that towel back!” to which the man named Mingi responded with, “No way in hell! San, you do it!” followed by another, “Don’t drag me into the consequences of your stupidity!”
You heard someone from the background yell Hongjoong’s name, and as the camera was turned towards where the sound came from, you were met with the sight of a man who you recognized as Wooyoung hiding behind someone who seemed to be way too calm considering the fact that the kitchen was literally being set on fire—he was even eating an apple, if anything. The video switched to the front camera, revealing a man who, this time, seemed to look too happy despite the fire unfolding right behind him, and he even had the guts to giggle and wave to the camera.
Needless to say, you were left speechless, and the video wasn’t even halfway finished yet. You pressed his screen to pause the video, being met with the sight of him contemplating whether to laugh over the memorable (strangely enough) moment or to let his grudges come crawling back at him.
Looking at the expression on his face, you couldn’t help but laugh, your voice echoing around the quiet halls of the library. “So that’s what living with seven people looks like…” With the way you spoke, Hongjoong was unsure whether you meant it in a good way or not—and if he were to be honest, that’s exactly what made your reaction even more amusing.
“That’s also why I wasn’t able to come back to the aisle after looking around. Sorry,” he apologized, sheepishly rubbing his nape. You were quicker than a millisecond to dismiss his apology, shaking your head as you reassured him that it’s fine and a while has passed ever since that day anyway so you don’t really mind anymore. You had that awkward smile on your face again, and Hongjoong had to put every fiber in him to use in order to hold himself back from just melting right there and then.
Suddenly, your phone rang yet again, cutting your conversation with Hongjoong short. Assuming it was your roommate calling you, you were about to decline the call, but it wasn’t until you read the contact number’s nickname and realized it was your mother calling you and not your roommate.
You were quick to tidy yourself and hung your pink crocheted crossbody bag over your shoulder, reaching for the book that was resting in front of Hongjoong by the table, retracting your hand for a split second when you realized you hadn’t even told him yet that the book your roommate wanted you to borrow from the library was the one he was reading before you approached him.
He looked up at you from his seat, tilting his head. “You need it?” he asked, making you nod. “If you don’t mind, of course, it’s just—” Hongjoong waved you off, gesturing for you to take it, swearing he doesn’t mind at all. Just as you reached for the book once more, his hand rested on its cover at the same time, pushing it towards your direction. It didn’t take you longer than a second to realize your hands were on top of his. Your phone has stopped ringing, and the sound has now been replaced with your thundering heartbeat.
You were the first one to break the contact, taking your hand off his. Too focused on trying to look calm—you have no idea why having composure seems to turn itself into an almost unattainable challenge whenever Hongjoong was around—you fail to notice the way a hint of disappointment flashed on his eyes with you taking your hand off so soon, and it disappeared as quick as it showed up when you reached for the book once more the moment his hand was no longer sitting atop of it.
“I, um, have to go,” you stumbled over your words as you shoved the book inside your bag, “I’ll… see you around?” You sounded way too hopeful for your liking, but before you could take your words back and replace it with something more neutral, Hongjoong beat you to it by grinning at you widely, nodding at your words. “Yeah. Yeah, I’ll see you around.”
But he doesn’t, and neither do you.
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Three weeks have passed, and the increasing amount of his library visits were starting to become more noticeable to the seven men Hongjoong shared his apartment with through every passing day. They all went to the same university, so they knew just how annoyingly cruel the campus librarian was, which made things even harder to piece together for them. Hongjoong had also spoken up once about how much he hates the librarian during one of their drinking games when he was under the influence, so his frequent visits at the library were really confusing—save for one person who had an idea what the reason behind it was.
“You’ve noticed it too, haven’t you?” Mingi tilted his head at San who sat across from him, enthusiastically munching on the desserts he ordered while taking a few sips of his coffee in between—clearly, he didn’t hear Mingi’s question. “You’ve noticed it, right?” Mingi repeated his question, this time a little louder in hopes of getting an answer from San. His attempt proved to be successful as San finally looked up at him with a confused expression on his face. “Noticed what?”
“Oh, you know. Hongjoong and his sudden library star user transition,” he shrugged, and San let out a hum of realization after being given context. “Yeah, I have. What about it, though?” Mingi scoffed in disbelief, having a hunch that San was just playing dumb. “Come on, San. Don’t you think it’s strange? Because I do.” But the aforementioned man’s eyebrows only furrowed as he asked once again, “What is?”
“What isn’t strange about it? You know he hates the librarian just as much as we all do, right? Don’t you ever wonder what on Earth is he stopping by the library everyday for?” For a few seconds, the only thing San could do was stare at Mingi from across the table, mouth slightly agape as if he was trying to connect the dots inside his head. And then it clicks—finally. “Oh… Oh. I mean, now that you’ve mentioned it, it does seem a little weird.”
“Right? I asked Seonghwa last night if he knew anything about it, but he told me Hongjoong hasn’t brought up anything related to the library to him so far. I mean, sure, yeah, Hongjoong likes to read, so normally, it would make sense for him to visit the library every now and then—but everyday? Is he reading a compilation of the terms and conditions of every existing app?”
“You may be overanalyzing a little, don’t you think?” A familiar voice spoke up from behind San’s seat at the cafe, making him turn his head around as Mingi only had a smile on his face, already having seen the man enter the cafe before he even approached the two of them. “You know you can visit the library for more than one reason, right?” He gestured for San to move aside, opting to sit beside him as both of them were now facing Mingi, who sat on the opposite side of the table.
“And what would those other reasons be?” Both Mingi and San asked in unison. “I don’t know, maybe the usual things that happen when you’re a college student on the brink of graduation with an eye for attractive people?” Mingi’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Yunho, what the hell are you even talking about right now?”
Yunho rolled his eyes, leaning against the cushion of the sofa he sat on. “Think it through, Mingi. Hongjoong wouldn’t even dare to consider visiting the library everyday, had he not been developing feelings for a certain person he often sees there.” Both Mingi and San knew Hongjoong as someone who wasn’t quite fond of the idea of anything romantic, but it’s not like they knew what Yunho knew, anyway, so they resorted to laughing Yunho’s words off.
“You’re not onto something, Yunho,” Mingi began, and San continued his words, saying, “you’re on something.”
“Are you seriously accusing me of being high on a Saturday afternoon? Being high, if anything?” Yunho stared at the two men who were now proudly laughing over their joke in disbelief, frowning when he realized they didn’t even plan on taking his words with a grain of salt. “And are you seriously trying to get us to consider your idea of Hongjoong being hit by Cupid all of a sudden?”
“It’s not an idea, San. Just—would you just listen to at least a goddamn word I’ll be saying?” Yunho ran his hand through his hair, and only then did Mingi and San stop with their antics. Moments of Yunho being upset were extremely uncommon, and whenever it would happen, all of them would always fail to hear the end of it. “Alright, alright, I’m sorry. Where did your theory come from, anyway?”
“For the second time now, it’s not a theory. It’s a possibility loosely based on a conversation Hongjoong and I had a few weeks ago while you were all asleep.”
“So… a theory?”
“God, no!”
“It is, though.” San backed up Mingi, making him pat his back with a grateful expression on his face. “See? He gets me.” Yunho only responded by rolling his eyes, shaking his head in disbelief. “It doesn’t matter whether it’s a theory or not—just hear me out, please.” San could tell Yunho was growing tired of their shenanigans, so he was quick to lock in and get serious. “Shoot.”
“It was around three in the morning already, and I was in the living room watching a movie. Hongjoong suddenly came out of his room and sat beside me, and he asked me a question I wouldn’t have expected to come from him. He asked me if I’ve ever thought of something so often to the point where it drives me frustrated, and based on the look on his face that night, I assumed his answer would’ve been yes if I asked him the question instead and not the other way around. I told him it depends on whether it’s a “something” or a “someone,” and he gave me a look that non-verbally told me it was the latter in his case.”
“So, to sum it all up, he likes someone who visits the library often?” Mingi asked, and Yunho shook his head. “From the looks of it, I’m pretty sure he’s waiting for a certain someone to visit the library everyday.”
“Why the library, though? And why would he have to do it everyday? Doesn’t that sound a little creepy? Or maybe that’s just me, but, I mean, there’s no way you don’t find it weird at all, Yunho,” San said, wondering why on Earth would Hongjoong have to visit the library everyday just to see whoever his crush was.
Yunho sighed, “That’s not exactly the case, you know.” Both Mingi and San’s attention were completely hooked once again, both of them leaning forward on the sides of the table they sat on, eager to listen to what Yunho was about to tell them.
“What I’m thinking is that Hongjoong probably last saw his crush in the library, and that whoever that person is went out of town—but Hongjoong doesn’t know, hence why he keeps on visiting the library everyday in hopes of seeing his crush again.”
“That’s… oddly specific,” Mingi gave Yunho a skeptical gaze, whereas San remained drowning in his own thoughts. “The fact that your theory is actually highly likely to be correct is what scares me,” San said, finally speaking up after a few seconds of silence.
“It’s not a—”
“Yeah, yeah, not a theory! We get it!”
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It’s been three months, at most. You wanted nothing more but to leave your hometown and head back to your apartment—you never liked the suffocating feeling the walls of your mother’s household would always give you. You’re starting to miss hearing your roommate’s loud snoring in the brink of dawn, too. You wonder how she’s holding up—it’s not really your thing to keep in touch with people while you’re away as it only makes you miss them even more, and this is something you fortunately remembered at the last minute to tell her before you left.
Your mother had contacted you that time you were hanging out with Hongjoong in the library to tell you to head back to your household as she and her garbage of a boyfriend had scheduled a three month vacation for themselves, leaving you the responsibility to watch over their house while they go out and enjoy their lives to its fullest. How pathetic.
You vividly remember feeling your heart ache with flames while you had to fight back your tears while packing your things—trying so hard to convince your roommate—who you assumed by that time was probably hanging out with the guy from her linguistics class—that you were fine when she was on the other line of the call while you were informing her about your sudden vacation, even though it was painfully obvious you weren’t by the way your voice kept on trembling with every word you spoke.
It didn’t help that all you could think of while spacing out while waiting for the train you took to arrive at its destination was the way Hongjoong’s eyes widened ever so slightly when you placed your hands atop of his by accident, as well as the way he’d flash you that toothy grin of his every single time you’d find yourselves staring into each other’s eyes.
No, it really didn’t help. Especially considering the fact that you don’t even know why the hell you were thinking of him when you were supposed to be upset because of your parents. It really, really didn’t help how thinking of him ended up painting a small smile on your face that was quick to disappear the moment you snapped back into reality.
Yet here you are now, mindlessly staring outside the window of your childhood bedroom, watching the sun slowly fall into a deep slumber as you wonder what Hongjoong could have possibly been doing by the other side of the world. Part of you regrets not taking the old book you borrowed from the library with you, but at the end of the day, you borrowed it to help your roommate forge a connection with her crush, and not with your own, for heaven’s sake. Wait, what?
And then it hits you—he doesn’t know. He doesn’t know you’re out of town and will continue to be for three more days. You wonder if he thinks of you as much as you do of him. You wonder if he’s out there, waiting for you. You wonder if he wonders what you’re doing right now as well. You wonder if he’s concerned about you.
“Oh, God, I can’t do this anymore,” you buried your face in your hands in frustration, sighing heavily as you parted your fingers to glance at your phone placed by your bedside table. Its screen, although pitch black, felt as if it was glaring directly at you, taunting you to take it and just say “screw it” and break your no-contact-during-vacation rule.
And you did, in fact, say, “Screw it.”
Quickly scrolling through your contacts, you wasted no time and immediately dialed your roommate’s number, the constant ringing of your phone echoing around the almost empty surroundings of your bedroom. Most of the things you left here before moving out have already been thrown out, it seems.
“Oh my God!” The screeching of your roommate from the other end of the line made you jolt in surprise, hissing as you felt your ears ring due to how loud her voice was. “Is this real?! I thought you said you wouldn’t call me until you’re back here! What happened?! Is something wrong?! Are you okay?! ARE YOU—”
“Calm down! Do you want me to go deaf or something?” Your voice was as calm as ever, a stark contrast to hers. “Did you really miss me that bad?” Chuckling, you await her response, which arrived faster than a millisecond.
“Did I miss you? Did I miss you? You have no idea how quiet it has been in here ever since you left! I have no one to annoy and it’s slowly driving me insane…” she let out an exasperated sigh, making you laugh. “I’ll be taking that as a yes, then.”
Your roommate clears her throat, going back to the topic at hand. “Seriously, though, why’d you suddenly decide to break your no-contact rule? Are you alright?” Concern was evident in her voice, and it almost made you tear up. You failed to realize just how much you missed her until now.
“I’m still breathing, that’s for sure,” you joked, laughing after hearing her groan as she said, “Now’s not the time for your jokes! Did something bad happen over there?”
“No, not really, but… well, you know, I’m not supposed to come back until Friday this week, but I really don’t think I can stay here for any longer. I’m all alone because my mother and her boyfriend are out on a vacation, and I haven’t had anyone to talk to for the past few months I’m not used to waking up because of my alarm and not because of your loud snoring, you know?”
Truthfully, you really did miss her. But even if you knew she was not the only reason behind you desperately wanting to leave your hometown, you figured you’d have to tell her all about it another time—just not now.
“I can’t tell whether you meant that as a compliment or an insult…” she sighed, making you erupt in a fit of laughter. Darkness was now starting to consume your surroundings, with the moon all up and about. Your bedside lamp is now the only source of light your bedroom has. “Do me a favor and take it as both?”
“Haha, yeah, real funny. I really hate you, you know.” You could tell from the tone of her voice alone that she was rolling her eyes, making you laugh once more—she seriously had to stop, or else you were certain you were gonna have to go to sleep with an aching stomach. “I don’t think you do, though…”
“You know me too well,” she sighed, faking an exhausted tone. “Is there anything you wanna tell me about? Like, you know, literally anything? I feel like all we’ve ever been talking about lately is mister linguistics class who is my man but is technically not my man but will, one day, become my man… come to think of it, I don’t think you’ve ever talked to me about any of your crushes—”
You could still hear her voice through the speaker of your phone, but the moment her words entered your ears, they were all muffled—you were, once again, adrift in a sea of your own thoughts. In a way, she was right about the part where you never talk to her about anything regarding your romantic affiliations—but that’s precisely because you don’t even have one in the first place, and you swore to yourself you’d keep things that way until you graduate.
But right now, as your thoughts drift back to Hongjoong yet again—something that seems to have been happening way too often for your liking at this point, you weren’t so sure anymore.
“—Oh, you do like someone!” Beaming happily, she squealed like a little child winning a plushie from a claw machine for the first time, pulling you back up to the surface of reality. Surprised, you stumbled over your words, “W-What?”
“You suddenly grew quiet when I started talking about relationships, you know.” I did?
“If I were to guess, I’d say there’s a certain someone who came to your mind the moment I mentioned the word “crush” and brought up how you’ve always been so secretive with your dating life.” You could visualize the teasing smile on her face as she spoke, and it made you feel flustered. She was right, but were you really going to tell her that?
“So, who is it? Can I make a few guesses? Promise me you’ll bring a basket of candies home for me if I get it right!” It wasn’t exactly like you were doubting her—it was more on the fact that you, yourself, weren’t even sure if you actually harbor feelings for the only person in your mind right now. If you were to think about it, wouldn’t it be too soon to say you do?
Maybe it was the way he seemed to have an eye meant for seeing everything around him as diamonds in the rough—an eye able to see the best even in those already proven to be the worst. Maybe it was the way he has no fear of expressing himself freely—maybe you just admired that trait of his and wished to have it as your own. Maybe it was the way he’s always eager to thoroughly get to know the details of everything he crosses paths with—the way he reread a book five times just to look for the foreshadowed parts may sound a little silly to be used as an example, but it serves its purpose.
You don’t really know much about him, except for the fact that he lives with seven people whom you could tell he adored so much, and that he liked to design his own clothes. So for a split second, you begin to debate whether you do like him or if you just admire him as a person.
But it wasn’t until you were reminded of the way you felt sparks ignite all over your veins when his fingers first brushed past yours that day in the bookstore, the way you stared at him a little longer than you should’ve when you saw him at the park, the way you had to hold yourself back from unconsciously leaning your head on his shoulder that day in the library—maybe the way you felt about Hongjoong was a whole book itself, and you’d also have to reread it a few times to catch everything you’ve overlooked in the long run.
You may not know him at all, but right now, one thing was crystal clear to you—you wanted to.
“Do you know the…” A little uncertain at first, you trailed off, not knowing whether you should continue or not. But then again, running away wouldn’t draw you any closer to your destination. “... Do you know anyone named Kim Hongjoong?”
Silence engulfed both of you for at least ten seconds at most, until it was broken by yet another squeal of hers. “Are you for real?! The Kim Hongjoong?! You like him?! Oh my God! Wait, now that I’m thinking about it, aren’t you two, like, polar opposites, at most?”
If only she knew.
“I guess…? Why?” You decided to play along with her for now, eager to hear what she has to say. “You two would totally be the cutest couple of the whole campus! I mean, come on, think about it! He’s a punk, and you do ballet! Well, technically, you don’t, but I trust you enough to rest assured you get the reference, so…”
“You think so?” Truth be told, you could perfectly visualize the message she was trying to deliver. Subconsciously, a smile soon began to creep up on your face over the thought of you and Hongjoong walking together, the stark contrast between your styles and the way you carried yourselves being heavily obvious.
“Oh, I know so! Wait, though—when, where, why, and how did this even start? I can’t believe you’re actually telling me about your dating life now!” She beamed, but you were quick to tone her down. “Now…? I don’t even have any experience within the dating field,” you said, bracing yourself from the scream that was yet to come from her.
“I’m sorry, what?!” Yeah, called it. “You heard it right. I wasn’t hiding anything from you—there were never any secrets to be hidden to begin with.”
“So Hongjoong is your first boyfriend—” “—I think we’re skipping a few chapters here,” you immediately cut her off, turning her assumptions down as fast as you could. “What do you mean?”
“Well… remember when you asked me to buy that one psychological thriller book from our local bookstore there?” You started, continuing after hearing a hum from the other line. “That was when I first met him. He was going to buy the same book as well, but we reached for it at the same time, and, I don’t know, we kinda… talked? And…”
You continued on, starting from when you first met him to when you last saw him. At this point, you could no longer even count the amount of times she had squealed over the phone.
“Wait, so you mean to tell me you didn’t even exchange contacts before you left the library? And he doesn’t know why you left?!” You could tell she was frustrated—and to be fair, so were you. “Well, if I did, we’d be talking to each other right now, wouldn’t we?” You sighed.
“So that means it’s been three months since you… wait, hold on… three months? Like, actually?” You have no idea why she was asking for confirmation all of a sudden, yet you let out a hum of approval anyway. “So that’s why he’s been… oh my God! If you don’t come back as soon as you can, I swear!”
“Huh? Why would I need to?”
“Hongjoong’s been visiting the library everyday for three months straight now! It’s, like, one of the many things our whole campus gossips about everyday! It all makes sense now…” What?
“What?”
“I’m telling you, you need to come back before it’s too late and he loses hope!” You couldn’t help but laugh at how she seemed to be more passionate about the topic at hand than you yourself, but in a way, she also had a point. There’s no guarantee he’d continue to wait for you until you’re finally allowed to leave your mother’s household.
And that was all you needed to hear for you to immediately hang up and rummage through the clothes you packed with you for your vacation—you could hardly even call it such, but whatever. You have no idea why you’re in such a rush, but for the first time ever, you opted for a casual look: a white shirt with an oversized pink hoodie with a half-done zipper on top of it, paired with shorts that weren’t even visible due to the hoodie’s length. You quickly slipped on a pair of white socks and wore your pink converse afterwards, having to re-do the shoelaces about three times due to messing it up over and over again because of how you were in such a rush.
You didn’t even have time to stand in front of your mirror to see what you looked like—your mind was set on coming back to you and your roommate’s apartment as soon as you could.
For a minute, you were stuck in a debate between following what you had to or what you wanted to. You knew for sure that dire consequences were to wait ahead of you if you were to follow the latter, but you could no longer find it in you to care. You had to follow your heart.
Sighing under your breath, you finally got yourself to twist the doorknob open, being met with the cold breeze of the night. Perhaps it wasn’t the best decision to wear shorts, but it’s too late to reconsider things now, is it? Quickly locking the door with your keys in hand, you wasted no time in sprinting to the nearest train station, not wanting to waste the chance that laid itself upon you.
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“Mind explaining what’s been going on with you lately?” Seonghwa asked, hands on either side for support as he leaned against the kitchen counter, eyes boring directly into Hongjoong, who was standing across him, too busy spacing out that Seonghwa was certain he didn’t hear anything at all.
“What?” Hongjoong’s voice was a little slurred, and one could easily tell he lacks sleep. “I said, do you mind explaining what’s been going on with you lately?” Seonghwa enunciated his words so Hongjoong could hear him better, only for the said man to respond with a chuckle.
“You really gotta stop overanalyzing everything around you, Seonghwa.” Yet the aforementioned man wasn’t having any of it. He knew very well of Hongjoong’s tendencies to deny his own struggles—even to himself, always refusing to admit he’s going through something even though it’s already crystal clear. Of course, Seonghwa and the rest knew to respect his boundaries and not pry further, but the circles under Hongjoong’s eyes were starting to grow darker, and he just couldn’t sit back and do nothing.
“I’m not buying your excuses this time, Hongjoong. Clearly, you’re forcing yourself to go through something all alone again.” Seonghwa sighed, brows furrowed in concern as he took in Hongjoong’s appearance.
“What? Like it’s the first time I’ve ever done so?” Hongjoong chuckled, although it was easy for Seonghwa to tell he was forcing it upon himself. “You know you can’t keep everything to yourself forever, right? They’re all worried about you, and so am I. Look, you don’t have to tell me all the details, okay? Just tell me what’s wrong.”
“How on Earth am I supposed to feel when someone tells me ‘see you around’ but then they proceed to literally disappear right after those words come out of their mouth? Wouldn’t you be downing a dozen shots in one streak too?” From the way Hongjoong spoke, it was clear that he was beyond frustrated. His words came out slurred and raspy, and even Seonghwa himself was surprised he understood what Hongjoong said.
Brows furrowed in confusion, Seonghwa leaned forward from the counter, clearly not knowing what the hell Hongjoong was talking about. “Woah, woah, alright, calm down. Where’d all this even come from?”
“It’s been three months—three months, Seonghwa. Disappearing without a word is one thing, but not showing up for three months is just absurd, isn’t it?” Hongjoong groaned, running his hands through his hair. Still confused, Seonghwa attempted to ask for a little more context. “Who are you even talking about?”
“Her, Seonghwa. The girl whose name I could’ve gotten sooner, had those stupid goons not decided to burn our kitchen. The girl Kyungmin mistook for a princess.”
Oh.
Oh.
So it all makes sense now. It now makes sense that Hongjoong scolded the rest of them for almost burning their apartment way too harshly than he normally would have. It now makes sense why he caught Hongjoong staring at the girl from the park longer than any other person would have. It now makes sense that—does this mean what Seonghwa thinks it does?
Hongjoong likes someone? The Hongjoong, who swore he’d never allow himself to get into a relationship yet again after a bad falling out with one of his exes a few years ago? The Hongjoong, if anything?
“Can I take a wild guess and assume she’s the reason behind your daily library visits?” Seonghwa asked carefully, not wanting to hit a wounded spot by accident. Hongjoong only sighed, “I wish she wasn’t. Really, really wish she wasn’t.”
“Why? Do you like her?”
Does he like you?
At first, Hongjoong refused to accept the terms. He knew very well of his promise to himself not to fall for anyone again, tired of experiencing the same hardships that came along with it over and over again. He knew he shouldn’t be thinking of you as often as he does. He knew he shouldn’t be letting you affect him in the simplest ways possible.
Yet here he was now.
“I tried to stop myself, you know. I really did. But I just—I couldn’t. I didn’t have it in me to forget about her just like that, even if she’s been gone for three months straight now and I don’t even know where she is.” Seonghwa could tell Hongjoong meant every word he said. It was still mildly surprising, but the words came out of his mouth so smoothly it was enough to tell Seonghwa he was really being genuine.
“I know I look stupid waiting like a dog in the library everyday, hoping I’d be met with her awkward smile when I turn my head towards the door whenever I hear it open, but I just—I can’t, you know? I can’t stop. Not when the last words we spoke to each other was about seeing each other around. I can’t help but wonder if I messed up unknowingly, somehow.”
Seonghwa’s gaze softened, stepping forward to gently caress Hongjoong’s shoulder in a comforting way. “Why not go on a midnight stroll? I think you really need one right now. I’ll make sure they won’t burn the kitchen again this time, okay?”
“You really know how to make me feel better, don’t you?” Hongjoong chuckled, looking upwards to prevent his tears from falling down. “I’m gonna need you to remember the fact that we’ve known each other since we were kids. Of course I’ll know that,” Seonghwa sarcastically said, although a smile was plastered on his face.
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At this point, you were certain your legs were about to give up before you could even reach your apartment. The train you took had a major malfunction in the long run, but you didn’t have it in you to wait for 30 minutes until the train would start working again, so you did the only thing you could—run. Okay, that was most likely not the correct solution, but it wasn’t like you had any other choice. You need to head home at least before 8:30AM tomorrow, since that’s usually when your mother would call you to ask how you, or rather, her house, is doing.
You stopped between your tracks to catch your breath, hands on your knees as your chest heaved with exhaustion. You decided to walk for at least a few minutes for now so you could regain enough energy to start running again later on, knowing there was absolutely no way you’d be able to keep on sprinting without passing out in the middle of it.
You were walking on an empty road, the dim lamp posts and the convenience stores from a distance being your only sources of light. As you were peacefully admiring your quiet surroundings, you spotted a coastline from a fair distance besides the road, only about a few steps away. As you drew closer to where the waves of the ocean met the sand, you saw a figure from afar sitting on a boulder all by themselves.
Except it wasn’t just a figure.
Your heart started racing, eyes widening in surprise as you focused your gaze on the person’s hair—you couldn’t have been mistaken. You know exactly who that split-dyed hair belongs to.
Before you even knew it, your feet had a life of its own, running towards where the figure was sitting even though your legs were literally about to give up after running for half an hour without stopping.
“Hongjoong?”
He turned around almost right after you called out his name, eyes all puffy and widened in surprise, blinking repeatedly as if he was trying to process the fact that you were standing right in front of him.
“It’s you.”
You no longer even cared if your actions were way too straightforward, immediately engulfing him in a warm, tight embrace as you buried your face in the crook of his neck. “Hongjoong—I’m sorry, I just…” Your voice came out as nothing but trembling whispers blending it with the midnight breeze.
For at least a few seconds, all he did was stand still, not an ounce of his body reacting to your touch. Afraid he might not have been comfortable with what you were doing, you were quick to take a step back, removing your face from his neck.
Yet just as you were about to release the grip you held around his body, he was quick to wrap his arms around yours, this time being the one to embrace you tightly. Hongjoong’s arms envelop you, holding you tightly against him. The warmth of his body, the gentle rise and fall of his breath—it’s an entirely new feeling, yet it felt soothing all the same, as if this was where you were always meant to be.
You let yourself let loose in his embrace, feeling the tension and worry of the past three months slowly melt away. You close your eyes, savoring the moment as you bury your face in his shoulder. The subtle scent of his cedarwood cologne that you missed so much mixed with the salty sea air lingers in your senses, making you feel grounded and safe.
His chin rests on top of your head, and you can feel him take a deep breath, almost as if he’s trying to breathe you in and reassure himself that you’re really there. His embrace feels secure and protective, as though he’s shielding you from the heavy burdens of the world weighing upon you.
You notice his hesitation in the way his hands pause on your back, almost unsure of how to hold you at first. But eventually, after being allowed a little more seconds to familiarize himself with the feeling of your body resting against his, he started rubbing your back in soothing circles, making you feel lightheaded—as if all of your worries have slipped away with just a single touch.
He removes his chin from the top of your head, making you stare into his eyes with a teary gaze as he does so to yours as well. “I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you about it beforehand, I…” you trailed off, words getting stuck in the middle of your throat after feeling Hongjoong cup your face with his hands, “... It all happened so fast, I… my mother needed me home right away, and I just couldn’t say no to her… I wish I could’ve told you beforehand, but she only told me why she needed me home when I was already there, so I couldn’t…”
Hongjoong’s gaze softens as he listens to your words. He gives you a small, understanding nod, but you can still see the hint of hurt in his eyes—his dark circles were so visible, even under the dim light of the moon. He pauses for a moment, as if gathering his thoughts, before speaking.
"I thought I might have done something wrong," he admits quietly, vulnerability evident with the way he spoke.. "I kept wondering if you were upset with me. It was... hard not knowing what happened.”
“When you left without a word, it felt like my world shifted,” Hongjoong begins. “We were in the library, and the last thing you said was you’ll see me around—but I didn't see you again. Not the next day, or the day after. I just kept going back, hoping you’d show up. It didn’t make sense—you were there, and then you were gone.”
“I started overthinking everything, replaying our conversations in my head. I wondered if I said something wrong or came on too strong, that maybe you didn’t want me to. I was scared that I might have scared you away somehow," he admits, and the way his voice trembled ever so slightly made your heart twist in pain.
“Hongjoong, I’m so sorry… I didn’t mean to leave you wondering if you ever did something wrong—I didn’t like what happened just as much as you do. I just… it’s complicated…” Truth be told, it really was.
Still, Hongjoong nodded with a faint smile on his face, reassuring you that he understands.“I know it wasn’t intentional,” he said, caressing your face with his thumb. “The nights were the hardest. I’d lie awake wondering if you hated me or if I had done something to upset you.”
You reach up to caress his face with your hands as well, staring at him with eyes that hold a swirl of emotions. “God, no, it never had anything to do with you… I’m so sorry for disappearing like that," you say softly, your voice filled with a mixture of guilt and frustration. "I wish I could have told you what was happening, but my mother... she wasn’t easy to deal with.”
As you hold Hongjoong close, you sense there’s more he wants to share, but he seems to be holding back, seemingly at war with his own emotions. You give his hand a reassuring squeeze, encouraging him to express himself.
He lets out a heavy sigh, his expression a mix of longing and frustration. “I’ve been trying so hard to sort out how I feel about all of this,” he begins slowly. “I’ve been at war with my own thoughts ever since you left. Trying to keep my feelings under control, trying to convince myself it was just a worry for a friend. But it just… doesn’t add up.”
He pauses, running a hand through his hair, his gaze on a far distance. “Every day, I would tell myself I could keep it together, but I kept thinking about you so much, it was starting to drive me insane,” he admits, although a little hesitantly. “I tried to keep it down to just concern, but it wasn’t enough. My mind kept circling back to you, wondering where you were, if you were okay.”
His eyes meet yours again, making your breath hitch. “I’d go to the library every day, hoping to see you, hoping to hear your voice again. It was maddening, not knowing if you’d come back or if I’d lost you completely,” he sighs, as his grip on the skin of your waist becomes a little tighter. “I just couldn’t shake it off,” he continues, his voice quieting down.
“You were on my mind all the time, and the more I tried to ignore it, the more frustrated I became. I tried so hard to deny it, but...” he pauses, taking a deep breath, as if he’s steeling himself for what comes next.
“Oh, screw it all,” he finally mutters, as if giving in to his own feelings. “I love you, and I don’t think I can hold it back any longer.”
“You… What?” Your eyes widened in surprise, struggling to process Hongjoong’s words. Hongjoong only smiled at you in return, repeating his words, “I said I love you. I really, really do.”
“Hongjoong,” you begin softly, your voice carrying a hint of nervousness. Hearing his name slip out of your mouth sent his nerves going haywire—oh, how he missed the sound of it.
“When I had to leave so suddenly, it was one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to do. It was so difficult not being able to explain what happened or tell you how much you mean to me.” You pause, trying to find the right words.
“You know, I… I promised myself I wouldn’t let anyone in until I graduated," you confess, your voice being a little softer than it already was. “So when I first started catching feelings for you, I was in complete denial. I didn’t know how to handle it.” You look away for a moment, feeling embarrassed.
“It was a war with myself, one I never expected to fight," you continued. “I told myself it was just a phase, just a fleeting crush. I even thought maybe I was imagining things or confusing friendship with something more.”
You let out a small, nervous laugh, trying to hide the depth of your feelings. “I even tried to tell myself that you were just a good friend, that I was misinterpreting my own emotions,” you admit. “But the more I tried to distance myself from my feelings, the harder it became. My heart kept betraying me, reminding me how much I looked forward to seeing you again, how your smile could light up my whole day.”
Your tone grows quieter as you share your struggle. “I kept thinking, ‘This can’t be happening. Not now. I promised myself I wouldn’t fall for anyone,’” you say, vividly remembering the battle with your own feelings you once faced. “But every time I thought of you, it became harder to deny it. My heart wouldn’t let me forget you, and it drove me insane. Eventually, I lost control, and…”
You take a deep breath, forcing yourself to face the reality of your feelings. “Now that I’m standing here with you, hearing you pour your heart out, I just… I can’t deny it anymore,” you admit. “I’ve fallen for you, Hongjoong, and I’m done pretending otherwise.”
And that was all it took for him to inch his face closer to yours, intertwining your lips with his. The kiss was nothing short of pent-up tension being released, and you could feel every part of your body being set aflame.
His hands wrap themselves around your waist, its grip on your skin tightening every now and then. Your hand traces his jawline, soon finding itself tangled in his hair while the other one balls the fabric of his shirt into your first, feeling yourself get even more lost in the moment with each passing second.
As the kiss intensifies, there’s a sense of exploration, as if both of you are savoring the taste and feel of each other’s lips for the first time. Hongjoong’s hands slide up your back, one hand finding the nape of your neck, his touch gentle yet firm as if he was using every single fiber within his body to hold himself back, sending a shiver down your spine.
You mirror his movements, one hand now resting on his shoulder while the other presses against his back, wanting to be as close as possible. The world around you fades away, leaving just the two of you lost in the moment.
As your lips finally part, you both find yourselves gazing into each other’s eyes as if both of you believe the other hung up the stars in the sky. “You know,” Hongjoong began to speak. “As grateful as I am that you’re back here with me now… I can’t help but wonder where on Earth you came from...”
“Can we please save that discussion for another time?”
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🪞 — lividstar.
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sapphoscorner · 3 months
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Edit: please reblog this with some information about demisexuality, I did make a mistake here by saying "Cove doesn't understand sexual attraction" he does, so my bad on that part
SO, I usually don't get too involved in fandom discourse, but with how Baxter fans are acting about the loss in the MDDB I snapped and decided we should have a talk.
(This turned out longer than expected so more under the cut. I BEG YOU TO READ THIS AND TOP UNDERSTAND WHERE THE ANGER AND FRUSTRATION COME FROM.
This is all over place, I tried my best to make this as comprehensible as possible)
Specifically I want to talk about this fandom obsession with him and how, is getting to a point where people are legitimately re-writing the game and erasing Cove existence to have this fucking man instead.
And look, I want to say that I get the appeal, I do, but I don't because Baxter's route is genuinely the worst written one out of the three; Compared to Cove's and Derek's (and Derek treatment in the fandom is a WHOLE OTHER ISSUE) is really not. I'm not here to judge one taste, I am here to tell you that your love for him is ridiculous.
It is genuinely ridiculous how much popular he has gotten and so many of you are forgetting about Cove and how important he is to the story, and generally how he is important to a lot of marginalized people. Some of you keep forgetting that Cove is autistic and demiseuxal and that is such a rare representation to see and it is already erased in the fandom (especially his autism), but now is even more erased because people are grabbing everything that makes Cove Cove, and are applying it to Baxter.
That is also not touching the fandom treatment of Derek and how overly criticize his route his compared to Baxter's, like...DEREK'S PARENTS ARE GETTING MORE SHIT THAT BAXTER CANONICAL BIGOTED PARENTS LOL, WHAT IS THIS?? Are you guys serious?? I've seen a fanfic with Irene being transphobic, why the fuck would someone write that when Baxter's mom is right there?
And Derek shitty treatment doesn't end here because people are straight up erasing the guy and not ?? talking about on how well written he is ?? He is not erased sorry, he's forgotten, no one cares about him. And when people care is a) rare or b) so criticize to the point where is no longer a criticism but just you bitching about it.
And it doesn't end there! Baxter is so talked about that people are more interested in him making a cameo in OL:N&F than the main characters of that game, THAT'S HOW THINGS HAVE GOTTEN, We've gotten to a point where people cares more about some white man than Qiu or Tamarack, which are way more interesting than him as characters but neither of them are white skinny man so lol, who cares about them.
AND TO TOP THIS SHITSHOW IT SOMEHOW GETS WORSE FROM HERE BECAUSE PEOPLE DON'T EVEN ARE CARE ABOUT THE INTERESTING ASPECTS OF BAXTER'S CHARACTER!!
Everyone is molding him like clay to create this, confident rich white boy when he is not?? and that's...the whole point of his route?? That he shouldn't need to put up this mask and to actually be a fucking human being?? THE FACT THAT HE IS A QUEER KID WHO HAD TO CUT OFF HIS PARENTS AND HAD TO BE INDEPENDENT FROM THEM AND LEARNING TO NOT DEPENDENT ON HIS PARENTS? (monetarily wise that is)
And like, people forget the man is queer, he is queer, he's a queer person who had to hide who he is to his parents and then had to cut them out for his own sanity, and no one mentions it.
The fandom as a whole erases queer identities,when this game is literally made FOR queer people don't you love it when straight people come into our spaces and erase our identities lol, that is a problem that more people should acknowledge, alongside the fact that Baxter's stans have taken over this safe space, overtook the main love interest, and ignore the genuine interesting aspects of Baxter's character to make him their own little doll they can play with and not appreciate a guy who is trying to learn how to stop being that mask everyone in the fandom has fallen over.
And I know, I know , I will get shit for daring to go against your favorite white boy, but consider that some of us played this game because an autistic character was in it, consider that this game is queer friendly and the fandom is also erasing that queerness to make horny fan fiction**, consider that some of us fond comfort in Derek and Cove's story and now we see everyone overtaking their stories by a white boy (that you can find in every other game), consider that his talk is tiring, consider also the fact that Baxter is technically queer and no one ever talks about it, consider that this game was a safe space for marginalized people and now it no longer feels that way
.
.
.
**with horny fanfiction I mean people re-writing Cove whole personality (and sexuality if we're being honest here) and making him this...horny big man when...he is not? He got stressed out by simply having to share a bed with MC, he's extremely shy around the subject of sex and he gets incredibly nervous about it.
I personally think that is due of both his queerness and autism (and yeah his personality, but autism affects ones personality so lol, sue me) since demisexuality means he genuinely doesn't understand how people can feel sexual attraction, and mixing that with autism means he probably doesn't understand the SOCIAL pressure around sex and having sex.
Granted that's speculation on my part but as someone who is (probably) autistic and asexual I can tell that, at least a majority feels this way and Cove is literally is the type to have this kind of mentality, he does not understand how Baxter can flirt with him after mere seconds of knowing each other
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wheels-of-despair · 1 month
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The Long Con Pairing: Eddie Munson x You Summary: Evil Woman brings Eddie a thoughtful gift... but there are some springs attached. Contains: A can of pretzels, a practical joke, a Wayne cameo. Words: 900ish
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"Heads up!"
You tossed a can of pretzels toward Eddie when you stepped into his room. Instead of catching them, he ducked, and they fell into the gap between his bed and the wall. The Black Hole. Where things go to die.
He tossed his magazine to the side and rolled over, head disappearing into the abyss as he dug for the pretzels. He held the can up triumphantly when he found it, then twisted his body back around to lie on his back. He placed the pretzel can on his stomach and twisted the label to face him.
"Name brand? Is it my birthday?"
"Buy one, get one free at the grocery store. Mom got one for me and one for you," you explained, dropping onto the bed to lie on your back beside him. "Well, one for you at each of your dwellings, more like."
"That was nice of her," he smiled, watching the can rise and fall on his stomach with each breath.
"She's a very nice lady. Where do you think I get it from?"
"HA!"
You reached over and smacked the can off of him, and he turned his head toward you with a pout.
"Watch it, Munson. You couldn't handle my mean side."
"You mean this is ni--" A pillow found its way to his face, muffling the mistake he was about to make. You flipped over and swung a leg over him, straddling him for pillow-holding leverage. His hands tickled your sides in retaliation, and somehow, by the time the struggle was over, he was on top of you on his bedroom floor and your sides were aching from laughter.
That's alright, Munson. This is a long con.
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Eddie ate his fancy name-brand pretzels slower than the massive value-sized bags he usually devoured by the pound. Personally, you couldn't taste much of a difference. It was all dry and salty to you.
But Eddie quite enjoyed them.
And you quite enjoyed planning the next step of your evil plan.
They really were on sale. Your mom really had bought them for him. But you'd been looking through a catalog of creative gifts the day she brought them home, and it had given you… ideas.
Every time he left his bedroom in the week that followed, you checked his pretzel progress.
When he got down to about a fifth of the can, you decided to make your move.
You waited until the phone rang. You were enjoying a lazy afternoon together; laying around and listening to music and maybe making out a little, sure to keep both volumes down while Wayne slept in the living room. Eddie rolled out of bed with a groan and went to answer the phone.
You darted toward your bag as soon as he stepped into the hallway, grabbing the twin to his treasured pretzel can and swapping it with the one on his bedside table.
You shoved his can into the bottom of your bag and returned to the bed, trying to remember how you'd been lying when he left.
"Telemarketer," he grumbled when he stepped back into the room. He closed the door quietly and reclaimed his place in bed, lying on his side next to you. "Now, where were we?" He waggled his eyebrows suggestively, and you laughed.
"Right about…" you inched closer and kissed the tip of his nose, "here."
The events that followed made you forget about your master plan for a while.
Until the phone rang at your house that night, while you were making dinner.
"Hello?" you answered, cradling the phone on your shoulder while you stirred a pot of noodles.
"I'll get you for this."
"Who's calling, please?" you asked with a wicked grin, knowing exactly who was calling and why.
"You are so not funny."
You heard laughter in the background. Is that… Wayne? You'd never heard Eddie's uncle laugh like that before.
"Really? 'Cause it kinda sounds like I am."
Eddie growls, and you cover your mouth so a giggle doesn't escape.
"When did you do it?"
"When did I do what?" you asked innocently.
"When did you rig it."
"I assure you, I have no idea what you're talking about."
It's getting harder and harder to keep the laughter out of your voice.
"I nearly pissed myself!"
That's when you cracked.
You'd found a spring in a pile of stuff you'd cleaned out of the garage, sewed a piece of fabric around it, and attached a tiny plush teddy bear to the end. You shoved it down your matching pretzel can, waited until the time was right, and made the swap. Eddie had just discovered his custom-made snake-in-a-can prank. The entire project cost you about $1. It was worth every penny.
You heard Wayne's laughter get louder, too.
"I did not!" Eddie insisted.
"Did not what?" you asked.
"He screamed like a girl!" Wayne howled in the background.
"Did not!"
You roared with laughter.
When you finally composed yourself, Eddie was waiting patiently.
"You know it's on, right? I'm gonna get you back for this." You can hear the smile in his voice cutting through his angry façade.
"I'd expect nothing less, Munson."
"See you in the morning?"
"See you in the morning," you confirmed. "I'll bring snacks."
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multifandomfanficss · 11 months
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Why Is This So Surprising?
Adrian Chase/Vigilante x Reader
(With cameos from all of the 11th Street Kids)
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Adrian Chase Masterlist
Prompt: The team sees a softer side to Adrian when his partner gets upset.
Warnings: Descriptions of something similar to a panic attack or autistic meltdown
A/N: So funny story this has actually been in my drafts for almost year and I forgot about it because I broke my phone the week I wrote it and got a new phone, but I’m thinking of maybe ending my hiatus and coming back soon. In the meantime I have some old fics I never posted. College and my mental health got in the way and I never got to finish some old WIPs, but I think I might finally be ready to pick them back up again! Hope you enjoy! ❤️🧜‍♂️❤️
You felt your breath catch in your throat as your lungs expand and contract trying to get air in. You were trying to forget about the mission you had just been on and you were having little success. You were able to push down your emotions on the car ride back to the old video store and you were currently staring at the piano, avoiding eye contact, in an effort to block out what Harcourt was saying. If you didn’t hear the debriefing it couldn’t be real, right? If you didn’t hear how terrible the mission went, it just simply didn’t happen. Sadly that wasn’t true. You found it getting harder for you to breathe. You pushed yourself up from your chair, getting ready to walk upstairs to be by yourself for a minute when you’re stopped by Harcourt.
“Where do you think you’re going? I didn’t say you could leave. This is important.” She starts.
“I don’t need a recap of this. Thanks.” You say, continuing upstairs, your voice cracking.
“Hey, (L/N), we all did things we aren’t proud of today-“
“You didn’t do what I did!” You yell at her. Suddenly the room starts spinning. It all just feels too real. You can feel everything and it’s too much. You hear a clock ticking, water rushing through pipes, feet slapping on the pavement outside, the click click clicking of heels, the electricity in the lights, the lights that just won’t stop flickering. You back up into a wall and slide down it, tears blocking your vision. You let a sob come out.
“What are we supposed to do?” Chris asks quietly, standing up and walking closer.
“I don’t fucking know! I’ve never seen them like this!” Harcourt whisper yells. Adebayo stands up and walks over to you, the rest of the team crowding around. They’re making it harder to breathe until you start hyperventilating.
“What can we do for you?” She asks.
“You guys can move the fuck over. Give them some space.” Adrian says, pushing his way through the crowd. “Somebody go get them some water.” He commands and John leaves the room to grab you a glass. “Are you pro touch or anti touch right now?” He asks, but you feel like you’re underwater. You feel like speaking is like moving through quicksand and you just can’t manage it. Adrian slowly puts his hand out towards you, like a wounded animal. He tries to take your hand in his and at first a little jumpy, you let him. He puts your hand over his chest and takes deep exaggerated breaths. “Follow my breathing, okay? In and out.” He instructs you and you breathe together. “You’re doing such a good job.” He praises. When your breathing becomes somewhat regulated Adrian moves so he’s sitting against the wall and you’re leaning against his chest. He’s giving you the pressure you so desperately need, as he sways with you. He brings you back to this planet. Slowly, gravity starts to feel normal again. Now that you can breathe a steady stream of tears starts to flow. He wipes them occasionally as you lay with your ear to his chest, listening to his heartbeat drown out the other noises that were too loud. “It wasn’t your fault. You did your best. You’re okay. Everything is okay.” He reminds you. John hands him the glass of water. “Here, (Y/N), drink this. You need to stay hydrated.” Adrian reminds you, as you take the glass of water. It feels cool against your throat which had previously felt like fire. “Thank you.” Adrian says to John.
“You’re welcome.” John responds. The rest of the team just stares. They’ve been staring the whole time. You don’t even notice the stares and neither does Adrian. Your minds are on more important matters. You completely forget they’re there until they start to speak up.
“How did you know what to do?” Harcourt asks.
“What do you mean?” Adrian answers her question with another question.
“Well we didn’t even know what to do and you say you don’t have emotions.” John comments.
“I say I don’t have emotions like other people. That doesn’t mean I don’t have emotions. I just have them differently.” He clarifies.
“Well you clearly don’t know what to do when I’m crying.” Chris starts. He then clears his throat. “I mean if I had cried you wouldn’t know what to do. Because I never cry! Crying is for babies!” He adds. Adebayo gives him a look and Harcourt slaps him on the arm.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Harcourt whisper yells. You don’t take offense to his comment. You know he has masculinity issues.
“First of all crying is healthy. It’s a fundamental part of human nature. Second of all they’re my partner. We’ve slept in the same bed for over a year. I’d think I’d know how to take care of them. Why is this so surprising?” Adrian roles his eyes at the others while they shrug. Everyone has something to say, but they just decide to keep their mouths shut. As the tears start to slow, you shift in his arms, getting more comfortable. You don’t realize how tired you are until your eyes start to get heavy after you’ve made it to a comfortable position. You look up at him with pleading eyes.
“Can we go home now?” You ask.
“Of course, Babe.” He says, planting a kiss on the top of your head. Adrian moves you off of his lap, stands, and reaches out a hand for you to lift yourself up with. The others wish you well as you collect your things to go home.
“(Y/N), you don’t have to come in tomorrow. Get some rest…and Chase…I’m sorry we underestimated you.” Harcourt tells the both of you. You can’t see your boyfriend’s goofy smile in the dark of the night outside the video store, but you can hear it in his voice as he thanks Harcourt and bids his goodbye. When you get home Adrian puts you in his softest t-shirt and you climb into bed. He pulls you to lay on him and you don’t object. You enjoy the feeling of his chest rising and falling and the sound of his heartbeat. You like that you can hear it better now that his suit is off. It’s comforting. He’s comforting.
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darthenderson · 11 months
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So, I went back and rewatched Boy Meets World and Girl Meets World (at the same time). Heres the thoughts:
I watched Girl Meets World before (when it came out in like middle school/high school; I’m in college now so it’s been a while) and since I’m a Boy Meets World fan I thought I would go back and rewatch it.
Boy Meets World is amazing. The storylines, the characters, everything else; I will always love that show and I often rewatch it.
Girl Meets World is 95% hot fucking garbage. Like I get it’s a Disney channel show- it’s not going to be the greatest thing ever- but good god this is a mess. The writers didn’t really get to tell the story they wanted because of Disney, at least I hope that’s what happened instead of actually thinking that this would be on the same level as Boy Meets World.
—————-
The 5% of the show I enjoyed was:
- Eric’s episodes
- Eric and Tommy’s reunion
- Eric and Jack’s reunion
- Seeing more of Cory and Topanga’s relationship
- Some of Shawn’s episodes
- Some of Farkle, Smackle, or Maya’s scenes (definitely not a lot of them though)
- Stuart Minkus’ appearances (and Jennifer too)
- Feeny and the other original characters making cameos too
———-
The rest of Girl Meets World I kinda hated.
For example:
- they did Angela dirty (like, wtf? They acted like she wasn’t close friends with Cory, Topanga, and the other characters before she left in Boy Meets World; it seemed like they made some of the characters mad at her (Riley) for no reason at all, she did nothing wrong in my opinion. And I would have loved to see more of her, like as an Aunt to Riley and Auggie or something)
- they did Jack dirty too (he would’ve definitely stayed in contact with at least Eric and Shawn, being as close as they were on Boy Meets World. And why wasn’t he at Shawn’s wedding? Also, we should’ve seen more of him after the semi formal episode, and jeric should have happened)
- no Rachel appearances (I would have loved to see her again, and she did stay in contact with Eric, as mentioned in the show, so she could’ve come back)
- the annoying ass Riley, Maya, Lucas love triangle
- the fact that they still didn’t make jeric happen (I need them to happen. They would be so cute! Just look at them:⬇️)
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- Mr Turner not having more scenes (I hated that he wasn’t at Shawn’s wedding- like we knew he was in NYC, he could’ve been there- and that he wasn’t in more scenes, especially ones with Shawn)
- the whole “Maya is turning into Riley and they have to stop it” arc. (It was- like the love triangle- annoying, long, and unnecessary. And people do change in high school- and often do a full 180 to their personality; I know I did, and on the Boy Meets World universe Harley Kenner did too. I didn’t even notice the change until it was outright said on the show, and I think the characters discouraging this was just wrong. Yes, Maya did change a lot throughout the show, but that is good. It shows growth, it shows a character arc, that her life is getting brighter and she has more hope, and I still saw Maya as the same character at that point. Anyway, I think that this whole arc was just bad, but I think that Maya still was a good character- she was just poorly written sometimes)
And let’s not forget the two biggest reasons I hate this sequel:
- Joshaya (that relationship was creepy as hell now that I’ve watched the show as an adult, in middle school I didn’t really see why people disliked it, but now I get it. I mean at the end of the series Josh is a FRESHMAN IN COLLEGE (around 18) and Maya is a FRESHMAN IN HIGH SCHOOL (around 14 or 15), them doing what they do on the show is illegal. And Josh saying that he’ll “play the long game” too and wait for her? Ew. Just ew. That makes it so much worse; it implies that he’s waiting until she’s 18 or in college and that’s just disturbing and disgusting for a Disney channel show and in general. Overall: Joshaya is gross and illegal and should’ve never been a thing and other characters should not have encouraged it on the show)
- “Girl Meets Farkle” (the infamous autism focused episode. I loved the fact that it had representation for autism, but I hated the way this episode was handled and written. This was by far the worst part of the show for me. I hated the way that some of the characters (Riley, Maya, Lucas) reacted when Farkle said he might be autistic. They acted like it was some horrible thing to be autistic, (which- as a human being and recently diagnosed person with autism- I found offensive) seriously they acted like autism was going to kill him (I’m not joking, that’s how they reacted) and they even went as far as to make Farkle mask who he was in one scene when Farkle said that he identified with some signs of autism. Like, all he wanted was support from his friends when he was getting tested and figuring things out, and all he got was hate from them. And I hate that other characters (and the writers of the show) didn’t see this too and change things or put a stop to it. They also used some outdated language to describe the spectrum on the show, which didn’t help things at all. For a lot of people and viewers, this was the first time they really learned about or saw anything about the spectrum and autism and this is just a horrible way to learn about this. Additionally, I loved Smackle’s whole story and telling how she got diagnosed, but I hated how some characters (Riley and sometimes Maya) treated her throughout the show. As an example: Smackle, as shown in the series, doesn’t often like hugs or physical contact (like me sometimes) and she makes it known, but Riley still fucking tries to hug her constantly and it’s so irritating! I know that if I was having a moment like that, as I often do, and someone tried to hug me like that I would be very uncomfortable and upset, so this whole thing they do with those interactions on the show just pisses me off. Overall: this episode of the show was offensive and horrifying, mostly because of the way the show frames autism and the way that the other characters react to Farkle and his potential diagnosis and Smackle with her actual diagnosis.
—————
In conclusion to my long ass rant:
Me at Boy Meets World:
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Me at Girl Meets World:
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demigods-posts · 1 year
Text
Reasons why Son of Poseidon from The Lightning Thief musical is an amazing song:
1.) “What belongs to the sea can always return.” I don’t remember if this was an actual quote from the book, but it is a damn good one. Percy having the seashell from the very beginning and using it to return to the ocean later on is so cool. It’s almost like Poseidon knew they’d have to face Ares. Also, Poseidon giving Percy a seashell in the musical has the same energy as Poseidon giving Percy a sand dollar in the books lol 
2.) “And I know right now things are less than fine, but I think my dad may have thrown me a line.” The water-related puns are very Poseidon-coded, which it makes sense being that Percy is his son.
3.) “And better late than never to finally get a sign!” And then the call back to ‘Their Sign’ from earlier in the musical!
4.) “Who wins if the gods go to war? Ares, the god of war.” I remember being taken aback by this plot twist when I read it for the first time, and it hits just as hard in the musical. I think some people in the fandom forget that Percy Jackson has always been incredibly observant, emotionally intuitive, and intelligent, and moments like this remind us of that.
5.) “Well, he’ll have to get through me! We’ll take him down. We work well in three.” “Plus, a half-goat with a great goatee. Let’s do this!” I love how even when Percy is being a bit reckless and impulsive, his friends still got his back. Also, I’m just now realizing that ‘goatee’ was a pun lol
6.) “You’re the two best friends this screw-up ever had.” And then Percy returning the sentiment by labeling them his best friends is all I really need. I love this trio!
7.) “You may be a god, but you’re going down all the same!” Leave it to Percy to disrespect a god to their face when he knows the god doesn’t deserve it. Sally raised him right.
8.) “Your meat is minced. I’m here to mince it.” And then having Ares sing about an action already taking place before he performs the action just like Clarisse did in ‘Put You in Your Place’ is an interesting way to shine a light on how similar children of Ares can be to their godly parent. 
9.) “You think the god of war is afraid of a little water?!” “How do you feel about a lot of it?” Percy coming up with witty comebacks that will either make the situation worse or turn the tide in his favor is so in alignment with his character, and I love the writers' attention to that detail. 
10.) “I’m the son of Poseidon. I never asked to be, but I’m the son of Poseidon. Now, face the tide inside me!” I feel like this song, particularly, this moment, is a callback to his first line in the musical/books: Look, I didn’t want to be a half-blood. Percy has come to terms with what his life is, and is starting to accept it. We love to see character growth. 
If it isn’t abundantly clear already, I love this song. I love that the trio has clearly grown from constantly fighting in ‘Lost’ to having each other's back in this song. I love the Ares-Clarisse similarities. I love Ares’ singing voice. I love the Sally and Hades cameo. I love it all.  
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I hate when they change like vital plot points of a book to fit in a movie. I mean, first of all the iconic F outfits. The Circus of Talents. We lost Princess Uma, a bad bitch if there ever was one. Anyway thoughts below but I can’t add a read more on mobile so sorry. Spoilers obviously.
Thoughts on the School for Good and Evil movie
Good
- The design and aesthetic of all of it was beautiful. I mean like everything was elegant and stunning and just visually incredibly pleasing.
- Sofia Ann Caruso is a great Sophie, she’s cringey and mean and overdramatic. She is the love child of Megamind and Regina George.
- Also Theron and Washington made great professors.
- The Tedros had a cool sword, iconic dumbassery, was pretty and also had cool fits which is how I like my men personally.
- Sophie and Agatha’s friendship at the start was super natural and well written.
- Soman cameo.
- I loved the little addition of Professor Anemone previously being a history teacher. It was just such a nice little touch to the world building and her character.
- The inherent creepiness of the casting for Rafal. I mean I always imagined him looking like a teenager but him looking like he’s in his twenties and trying to claim Sophie as his child bride really adds that extra layer of ickiness.
- Literally everything with Gregor Charming. An icon, a legend, he is the moment.
Bad
- Sofie Wylie is a good Agatha but they wrote her so blandly. Also like where was the initial awkwardness? We deserved bitchy goth loner Agatha. And like it would’ve been cool if Agatha was more conventionally unattractive. Like no hate to Sofie Wylie she’s absolutely gorgeous but it would’ve been nice if she did have that whole thing of yeah people don’t think she’s pretty but then her personality begins to outweigh that.
- Where the actual everloving fuck where Anadil’s rats? I was promised little rats. I was robbed.
- Why were all the Ever girls such bitches? I mean like passive aggressive? Yeah sure. But they were outright bullies.
- The plot change of Rafal purposefully letting Good grow complacent and vain. I think it’s more interesting when you have Good who genuinely have grown complacent without the manipulation of true evil or whatever. It adds more weight to it.
- The Circus of Talents was iconic and we deserved to have the wolves and fairies reveal.
- The blood magic? I mean like what? You have regular magic, no deus ex machina necessary.
- More development between our girls and Teddy. Like I love him being a pathetic little scrunkly but it felt like everything happened in two days. This may have been better adapted as a show considering it’s meant to be covering a whole year of school.
- We deserved hot pink finger glows.
- Lack of iconic book characters: Princess Uma, Castor and Pollux, the Golden Goose, the little pets they had, Anadil’s rats (yes I’m bitter), the librarian dude whose name I’m forgetting, he has Giles vibes, the seer, you know the dude.
- I wanted to see Hort’s frog pajamas.
- The actual explanation for the nemesis stuff like in the books.
- Where was the witches/Agatha friendship? Sophie betraying Aggie to avoid going home? Dovey caring about Good?
- More mean Sophie. Give the people what they want
- It felt so queer-baity. I know the book three twist but like it was just annoying.
Edit - Also the iconic line ‘I’m worse than my father. Because I still love you.’
All in all it was a fun movie but having loved the books as a kid I felt like they didn’t really get done justice. Two and a half hours wasn’t enough to cover the whole story adequately in my opinion.
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respectthepetty · 1 month
Note
Wait!!!!! HISTORY 4 is your all time fav?!? ITS MINE TOOOO!
Snap!!! TRASH CLUB TOGETHER? (Even though history 4 is NOT TRASH)
Anon, I feel like everyone should know this about me already because I state it any chance I can.
And it's mainly because of Li Cheng. He is my heart. He is everything to me. I love that pendejo the most and forever.
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Tan from Dead Friend Forever is a close number two, but Li Cheng means the world to me.
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He is the perfect character to me. He is a himbo. He is a golden retriever. He is emotionally intelligent. He is bisexual.
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And he is in love with his best friend Mu Ren!
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They were perfect!
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I also love Xing Si and Yong Jie's relationship and live for each of their cameos in other shows.
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It is NOT a trash show, but I do love it for trashy reasons.
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I love all the dick jokes because, sometimes, I think BLs forget that men have dicks.
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I love all the talk about sex, positions, and lube because these men were asking questions and figuring out how to give each other pleasure.
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I loved the fujoshi(s).
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And that Li Cheng actually got advice from them!
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I also just really like Charles Tu's body.
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Look at it.
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Which is why I'm super excited for First Note of Love, his upcoming BL with the side from My Tooth, Your Love, because it means I get to see him . . . and his body.
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Music will be involved, and I don't even care. I need this man back on my screen NOW!
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*eye roll* disgusting
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broodingheroine · 3 months
Text
tmagp 8 thoughts
ooo running on empty. interesting.
oh fuck right into it
tutoring?????
that's an intensive grading rubric jesus
brutalism and LIMINAL SPACE????
feeling a type of way abt this being abt architecture. we've been through this.
I'm actually impressed by the quality of this essay so far
it's lowkey giving lonely vibes and of COURSE norris is reading this one
I don't like the repeated use of hunger in regards to architecture
a tower. hm.
less and less people. every night. okay.
hunger again. do not like.
"strangeness"
okay whatever you do, do not eat the food
okay this is SO lonely. like yes ik don't apply smirkes 14 to tmagp but it's for my own brain. I'm not making statements of fact abt tmagp.
CANNIBALISM????
it's giving that ep of tma where the kid got trapped in an alternate abandoned amusement park with all the starving ppl
NO ONE NOTICED HE WAS MISSING???
oh alice that is actually really annoying. fill the kettle.
WE BOTH KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?? ALICE WHAT DO YOU KNOW
ooooo colins on leave. probably good for him but I'm sad.
SOURDOUGH MENTION❗️❗️❗️
GERRYYYYYYYY
GERRYYYYYYYYYYY
I'm gonna fucking cry oh my god oh my god
GERTRUDE??????????? WHAT IN THE EVERLIVING FUCK
barely remembers any of it............
BOOKS MENTION. OH MY GOD.
what if I died. actually what if I died.
YOUR MYSTERY?
time travels. other dimensions. teleportation.
PODCAST? WTG??????
GEORGIE
was there a glitch in the audio when she said georgies name or am I crazy
okay so fuck.
alice acts super different without an audience. she knows smth else is going on but she deliberately ignores it so she doesn't get caught up in it.
I was expecting a gerry cameo at some point so as excited as I was I wasn't Surpised.
BUT GERTRUDE? that threw me for a loop.
we're slowly collecting tma cast members. idk how to feel about this.
I'm deeply worried abt colin.
I wanna know what the painting was and why celia liked it so much. was there something about camden in tma that im forgetting? he called it "camden epiphany"
unless things are VASTLY different in tmagp universe, obviously gertrude is lying about gerry being her grandson. why though. when they traveled together in tma the common ruse they used was that she was his mother but why is there a need for a ruse here?
I desperately need to know what happened to mary and eric too.
"good luck hunting elsewhere" gertrude why did you use that word. why hunting. what do you know.
alright I think that's everything. I am absolutely catatonic rn. so many things.
this was a lot.
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elisysd · 11 months
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Us – James Bay
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Masterlist - Previously - Next Chapter
Tell me how to be in this world Tell me how to breathe in and feel no hurt Tell me how 'cause I believe in something I believe in us
“Lyanna, did you know that Charles had an acting past?” asked her Pascale.
“No I did not! Why did you not tell me?” she said while looking at him.
“Mom! I told you to not say that! You’re going to embarrass me!” complained Charles.
“What did you play in?”
“Nothing serious, just commercials for sponsors. Nothing worth talking about.”
“You were voicing over in this Pixar movie as well.” Added his mom.
“No way! It’s amazing. I would love to do that one day! It’s on my bucket list. Do you know that is actually really hard, you should be proud of that! Not everyone can do it.”
“It was just a cameo. See mom. Look what you did.”
“I definitely want to see you acting.”
“I have them on a hard drive if you want Lyanna. It should be here somewhere. Wait a second.”
“Mom, please don’t!” whined Charles under the amused gaze of his brothers.
And so Lyanna and the Leclerc family sat in front of the television again, watching Charles's poor acting career, his brothers never missing an opportunity to make fun of him. As for Lyanna, her eyes were glued to the screen and nothing seemed to distract her. With an impassive look on her face, she scrutinised everything, sometimes asking to rewind. Charles, for his part, was doing everything he could to hide. If the ground could swallow him up, he would be delighted. When they had seen everything, Lyanna turned to Charles, both hands on her knees, and looked into his eyes before taking a deep breath.
“Charles, you are great at a lot of things but acting is definitely not one of them.”
“You are crushing his dreams. He would have loved to shoot a movie one day.” Said Arthur.
“Shut up. I’ve never said that!” Charles tried to defend himself.
While everyone was gathered in the living room, Charles's mother got up to fetch some coffee. Charles took the opportunity to follow her, not forgetting to place a kiss on the top of Lyanna's head.
“So” he began “What do you think of her?”
He heard her sigh before looking at him. Charles gulped. His mother was extremely important to him, her opinion matters. Not to the point he would break up with Lyanna if her mother did not approve but it would make things easier for him if she liked his girlfriend since he intended to have her around a lot.
“I still need time to get to know her but she is nice.”
“And?” he insisted.
“You make a beautiful couple, really. You both care about each other, it shows. But she seems careful with her words. I got the occasion to talk to her alone and she did not strike me as the confident type which surprises me considering her career. She is on her guard.”
“Yeah, it’s something we are working on. Her past relationship was messy. Abusive boyfriend. She went through some tough things.”
“Oh, I understand better… poor girl. No one deserves that. On the other hand, it’s been a while since I’ve seen you acting so carefree around someone. You’re relaxing when she’s here. That’s something nice to see. I’ve never though I would see you in love with someone this soon, it’s not been a long time since you broke up with Charlotte.”
“Oh wow, calm down, mom. I’m not in love, yet.” Tried to display Charles, laughing awkwardly.
“If it makes you sleep better at night, darling. But I know you, I’m your mom and a mom knows these things.”
The evening wore on, the conversations died down and everyone went their separate ways. Charles took Lyanna's hand and led her through the flat to his childhood bedroom. 
“So this is where little Charles grew up?” she asked while looking at the room.
Nothing really changed. Trophies are on the shelves with some books as well that seemed to be there only for decorative purposes. Pictures of Charles as kid, with his friends and family were displayed around the room. A single bed in the middle of the room is facing the door. It seemed so small. Noticing Lyanna’s gaze on it, Charles sat down, inviting her to do the same. He took her by the shoulder and pulled her against him as he laid back and gazed at the ceiling.
His hand traced small patterns on her arm and hip while her head his resting comfortably on his chest and under his chin.
“How are you? I hope my family has not been too overwhelming.”
“I’m good. I like your family, really. You are all so tight knit, it’s cute to see.”
“I’ve never asked but what is your family like.”
“It’s a big one. I’m an only child and it has always been my mom and I. My father is not really around he left us when I was a teenager. I’m close to my mom’s family, especially my grandparents. I love them to death. I have a lot of uncles and aunts and cousins. We are all close. One of my uncle is a big F1 fan by the way. If you meet him one day, I’m sure he’ll freak out.”
“If I meet him? Not when?”
“I mean… would you like to meet my family?”
“Well, I introduced you to mine, so I guessed that at some point you would do the same.”
“It’ just that… we both have crazy schedule and it’s in the middle of nowhere in France, so we would have to both find time to organize something. I am not opposed to it though.”
Charles nods. It wasn't the first time he'd felt that way, but today it really hit him. They weren't on the same wavelength. Charles was ready to welcome her into his life, to make room for her and build something. She was still hesitating, as if she had one foot in the relationship and one outside. It bothered him but he chose to not tell her. It would be a conversation they would have later.
On the way back to Charles's house, Lyanna couldn't help feeling a certain awkwardness between them. Charles had not spoken to her on the way home and had seemed distracted and preoccupied. When he arrived, he went straight to the bedroom, leaving her behind. She followed him and closed the bedroom door. She watched him undress, unsure of what to do.
“Charles? Is something wrong?”
He stopped and turned towards her.
“Where do you see this relationship going Lya?” he asked her bluntly.
She opened her mouth to answer before closing it again. She didn't know how to answer the question or what he was implying.
“I… what do you mean?”
“What are your feelings for me? What do you feel about us?”
“I…you…”
“It’s not a difficult question to answer Lyanna. I have feelings for you that are getting bigger and bigger the more time I spend around you. I want to include you in my life and I want to introduce you to the world as my girlfriend. I want to proudly say that I’m dating Lyanna Michel and it makes me the happiest man in the world. That’s how I feel about you and our relationship.”
“I… I care about you. I like being with you.”
“That’s it?”
“I’m not good at expressing how I feel, Charles you know that.”
“But I need to know that we are on the same page and we are going in the same direction.”
“I’m not there yet, Charles. I like you more than a friend and I want us to work out. I just need more time.”
“I can give you all the time you want Lyanna, I just need a sign from your side that you want that too as much as me.”
The next few days passed in a strange atmosphere. Charles was often out and about and Lyanna spent her days in the bedroom working on her own. Her conversation with Charles went round and round in her head. She didn't know how to tell him how she felt. She wanted to, she dreamed of doing it, but it was as if every time she managed to summon up the courage to tell him, something stuck in her throat. She couldn't do it, and that terrified her because she knew that if she didn't succeed, her relationship with Charles would suffer. She didn't want to lose him, she couldn't. Not like this.
On the morning of Charles's birthday, she got up at the crack of dawn, wanting to start the festivities just with him. She prepared breakfast on a tray before returning to the bedroom and placing it at the foot of the bed. She slowly approached his side of the bed and knelt down facing him. He was fast asleep and it surprised her to see how childlike he looked. She touched his face with her fingertips, making him flinch.
“Hey.” He groaned still asleep.
“Hey.” She answered. “Happy birthday.”
“Thank you.”
“I prepared the breakfast. I thought that we could eat it in bed?”
Charles sighed and moved to the middle of the bed, leaving enough room for Lyanna to slip in. He picked up the tray and set it down beside them before putting an arm around the young woman's shoulder and pulling her close to him, kissing the side of her head.
“I don't want us to be estranged, Lya. Not today. And I feel like that's what we've been the last few days. I don't like it.”
“I don’t like it either…”
“Can we forget it and enjoy today?”
She nodded against his skin.
“What do you want to do today? Knowing we have to be at the hotel by 8pm for your birthday party.”
He looked at her, smirking before looking down at her lips.
“I have a few ideas.” He said leaning in and capturing her lips with his.
Charles was late for his own birthday party, which drew mockery from the guests present, and then he was pulled in all directions by his friends and family, so that he soon found himself drawn away from Lyanna. With an apologetic look he left her. The young woman managed to find Kika in the crowd, who was chatting to a young woman she didn't know. When Pierre's girlfriend saw her, she motioned for her to join them.
“Lyanna, hey! This is Carmen, George’s girlfriend. Carmen this is Lyanna, Charles’ girlfriend.”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you!”
“Same here.” Politely answered Lyanna.
“So… What did you get him? Tell us!” excitedly asked Kika.
“I bought him a book about architecture. I did not know what he could want and he often talks about architecture and art so… yeah. But actually I have something more personal planned for him.”
“Oh tell us more. If you are willing to share that with us, of course.” Added Carmen.
“I’m not good with words and I don’t know how to tell him what I feel for him so I thought that if I can’t do that with my own words might as well put it in music. I’m going to sing something for him tonight that gathers exactly what I want him to know. If I don’t throw up because of nerves before. I’ve never done that in public. Is that a good idea or is it too much? Should I keep that for when it’s just both of us?”
“I think it’s very cute. He will love it.” Reassured her Carmen.
“And it’s very romantic.”
“Oh my god, I’m sweating.”
On the other side of the room, Charles has found his friends and is soon in the middle of the circle, a shot of tequila in his hand. Pierre mockingly hands him a small present.
“I couldn’t wait for you to open it.” Explained the Frenchman.
A little intrigued and at the same time suspicious of his friend's wry smile, Charles put his glass down on the bar and unwrapped the gift. It was a large, beautiful wooden frame with a stunning photo of Lyanna proudly wearing a "Liked by Pierre Gasly" T-shirt and an Alpine cap.
“So that you never forget that she was an Alpine fan first.” Commented Pierre under the laughs of their friends.
“I expect this to be put in your living room so everyone can see it. Or even better, just above your bed. That would be fantastic.”
“I hate you so much sometimes.”
They all continued to laugh together and to drink when something caught Charles’s eyes. A brunette woman that he knew all too well had just walked through the door. What was she doing here? Who invited her? Charles started to make his way towards her.
“Charlotte? What are you doing here?” he asked.
A few metres away, Lyanna had noticed the interaction between Charles and the young woman. A very pretty young woman, she couldn't help thinking.
“Hey, do you know who the girl with Charles is?” she asked to Carmen and Kika.
“Oh… It’s Charlotte. I didn’t know she was coming.” Carmen taught her.
She had never heard of that name. Charles never mentioned someone names Charlotte to her.
“And who is she?” insisted Lyanna.
“Hum… well… she is his ex-girlfriend. They broke up at the end of last year if I reckon.”  Explained Carmen without going into details.
Lyanna observed them for a while and she could not help but feel a hint of jealousy. They were deep in conversation, smiling and laughing with each other. They clearly were comfortable around one another. Charles had his hand on her shoulder and some of his friends came to her to greet her. Not once did Charles look into Lyanna’s direction. Lyanna leapt to her feet, swallowed her drink in one gulp and turned to her two friends, surprised by the sudden change in the young woman's attitude.
“You know what girls? I think it’s time for me to give Charles his present.”
Before she changed her mind and chickened out, she walked over to the stage where the band was playing and whispered a few words to the singer, who let her take his place. As silence fell over the assembly, everyone turned towards her and she caught the surprised glance of Charles who was still at Charlotte's side, except that they had also been joined by his brothers and his mother. Lyanna sat down at the piano and adjusted the microphone before clearing her throat.
“Hi everyone. Oh my God, it’s so weird. I’m not going to take much of your time I just wanted to wish a happy birthday to the man of the day. I sometimes have a hard time finding the right words to say to express what you mean to me and every day a part of me admire you for putting up with me. I don’t know how you do to be this patient. I would have given up on me a long time ago if I were you but you’re somehow still here. So this song is for you. Happy Birthday Charles.”
I promise you salt with the kiss of my lips
I promise you honey with the touch of my hand
I promise you the sky above your bed
Flowers and lace to make your nights sweet
I promise you the key to the secrets of my soul
I promise you life from my laughter to my tears
I promise you fire instead of weapons
No more farewells, only goodbyes
I believe in it like the earth, I believe in it like the sun
I believe in it like a child, like you can believe in heaven
I believe as in your skin, in your arms that hold me tight
I promise you a story unlike any other
I need to believe again
I promise you days as blue as your veins
I promise you nights as red as your dreams
Incandescent hours and white minutes
Carefree seconds to the rhythm of your hips
I promise you my arms to carry your fears
I promise you my hands for you to kiss
I promise you my eyes if you can no longer see
I promise to be happy if you have no hope
I believe in it like the earth, I believe in it like the sun
I believe in it like a child, like you can believe in heaven
I believe in your skin, in your arms that hold me tight
I promise you a story unlike any other
If you help me believe again
And even if it's not true, if you've been told too much
If the words are worn out, as if written in chalk
You can make a big fire by rubbing pebbles together
Maybe with time you'll grow to believe in it
We can just try and see
And even if it's not true, even if I'm lying
If words are worn out, light as wind
And even if our story ends in the morning
I promise you a moment of fever and sweetness
Not all night but a few hours,
I promise you salt with the kiss of my mouth
I promise you honey with the touch of my hand
I promise you the sky above your bed
Flowers and lace to make your nights sweet
The song ended in a whisper. Lyanna's voice trembled, as did her hands. She closed her eyes to try and pull herself together before she felt two arms pulling her against a warm chest.
“You’re my most beautiful birthday gift.” Charles whispered against her cheek.
When she looked at him she could swear he was crying.
=====
Lyanna's song to Charles
author's note: Happy Friday! I loved writing this chapter and I hope you enjoyed it as well. I can't wait to have your thoughts about it... especially now that Charlotte is introduced in the story 👀 As usual, don't forget to leave a comment here, or in the ask box or in the dms if you want to chat more about the story! See you soon for another update.
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