#why must you confuse me so i'm just a girl who likes olives

[l4long-winded]

a lip thought for u my dear 🧚🏻‍♀️🧚🏻‍♀️

i’ve talked ab this with olive before but. lip not realizing how much he loves cuddling until being with you,, laying with him nightly and rubbing your fingers over his stomach, at first he thinks you’re trying to start something but when he tries to flip you over you’re all “woah, hey, thought it was bedtime” and he’s just. “oh. uh, sorry i thought-“ and gets all flushed cause he’s not used to a girl who likes to lay with him and just be.

bonus points,, once it’s been going on for a while he’ll start to get grouchy if he doesn’t get his nightly cuddles in. maybe you’re up late doing schoolwork or a personal project or something, and he’s just grumbling and whatnot. you don’t think he even knows why he’s irritable, but you know the reason, and you find it endearing.

i just love him so much 🧍🏼‍♀️

my fucking heart ))))):

he's been in countless situations like this before. lying down beside the opposite sex, temptation written all over a warm body, beckoning him in for more and more.

so when you first have him like this, tucked into his side, head on his chest, your hand lingering under his shirt, he assumes you want sex. you're touching him all nice, smell so good, scattering soft kisses here and there, so he concludes to himself that he needs to put out. his arousal stirs, attempting to move you onto your back, his mouth mushing onto yours.

"hey, hey, we're not sleeping?" you mumble, fluttering lashes at him that confuse the hell out of his head.

"uh-... thought you wanted me to..." his voice trails off. you're not giving him the usual bedroom eyes. your gaze is gentle. his ears turn red, something stupidly warm inside caressing his ribcage.

"as much as i enjoy that," you begin with a small smile, "i'm fine lying here with you. c'mere."

lip's bewildered as he falls back into the mattress, an arm slinging back around your frame. you play it up. one of your legs even comes up to hook around his hips.

preconceived notions inform him he must be doing something wrong if he's this close to his girl in bed and not getting laid tonight, but he relaxes rather easily. your hand drifting back and forth on his chest and abdomen ease his worries, the weight of you in his arms expelling deep tension, and he's so comfortable. it's the best sleep of his life once he dozes off, not before he delivers an appreciative kiss to your forehead.

he gets addicted to the feeling after that. he looks forward to resting with you in bed especially when his days are filled with the usual bullshit he'll complain to you about later in a soft and drowsy voice as you hold one another and share lingering kisses. he definitely acts up whenever you're busy and up late, unable to bask in the nightly ritual.

"done yet?"

"no, lip."

and he groans in exasperation. he comes closer to where you are at your desk. his chin tucks onto your shoulder, nose brushing your neck.

"hurry up. gettin' cold over here."

you refrain from laughing. he could very well use the blankets if he's "cold," but you both know what he's really asking for without having to say it.

[radiant-reid]

Blurb on Derek giving spencer “advice” on

How to swoon reader but when he desperately tries to flirt with reader by acting like Derek the reader is all like “you know you can be yourself right?” This is just so cute and funny to me 😍

Love love love

“I just really want her to like me.” Spencer whines, trying not to look at you from across the bar. It’s basically impossible when you’re so enticing. He can’t help his eyes drifting over to you.

“You have to be smooth then, charm her.” Morgan instructs him. “Flirt with her, play some cat and mouse, touch her a little. You have to make her want you, and before you know it, you’ll have a girlfriend.”

Spencer shakes his head firmly. “I can’t.” Even with two drinks in him, when he’s bolder than usual, there’s no way he can flirt with you. “Seriously. She’ll just think I’m an idiot.”

“No, she won’t, kid,” Morgan reassures him. “I’ll give you some pointers if you want.”

Spencer’s first instinct is to shut him down. He’s never going to be able to get with you so why not try with one of Morgan’s routines. But the longer he thinks about his friend's flirting, the more clear the answer becomes. “Okay.” He agrees. If Morgan’s gotten countless girls to go home with him, something he does must work. “But I’m not baby-girling her.”

“Good. Garcia wouldn’t be happy with you.” Morgan reminds him. “What you need to do is go over there.” He points to the bar where you’re sitting with the girls. “Stand behind her with your arm on one side of her so when you talk, it’s in her ear. Ask her if she wants a drink. Then sit next to her, tap your knees against hers, compliment her and let the conversation go from there. Easy.”

It doesn’t sound easy. “Is that really going to work?” Spencer asks, not wanting to be set up.

Morgan hands him the rest of his beer. “If you drink this, ditch the cardigan, roll up your sleeves, gain some confidence, make eye contact and stop thinking so hard. Also, lower your voice.”

Spencer unhappily gulps down the rest of the beer, grimacing at the taste. He much prefers cocktails with enough sugar in them to make a normal person sick.

Morgan slaps him on the back as he gets up. “Go get the girl, lover boy.”

He’s nervous as he walks over. Although he’s permanently nervous around you. Following Morgan’s instructions, he places her hand on the bar to your right side and hovers behind you.

You don’t expect such a bold move to come from Spencer Reid, but you recognize those forearms and that cologne. “Spencer.” You hum, looking up at him. To your left, JJ and Penelope are watching eagerly.

“Want a drink?” He offers, already flagging down a bartender. His voice does make a noticeable shiver run down your spine.

You order another of what you were drinking and Spencer, much to your surprise, orders a scotch. It’s his own improv move, figuring Morgan doesn’t go around sipping cocktails.

He slides into the seat beside you while your drinks get made, and he spins the chair around so you’re facing him. That was smooth.

He taps his knee against yours, hoping you realize it’s more than just because he’s tall. “Green really is your color.” He says, looking at your olive-colored blouse.

“Thanks.” You reply, slightly suspicious. You hadn’t even realized Spencer noticed things about girls until now.

“It might be my new favorite color now.” He continues, cringing at every word. “Or maybe your eye color.”

You laugh, and he tenses, worried about how you're reacting. "Tell me more." You prompt.

"I'd love to." He agrees. "At mine or yours?"

"How do I know you're not a serial killer?" You ask, leaning closer and grinning.

He frowns at you. "What do you mean? Obviously, I'm not, we work together against serial killers."

"Really? Because I thought maybe you were one of those frat boys." You nod to a group of backward-cap-wearing, colored-shorts kids. "Who definitely have fake IDs."

"What?" He asks again, confused.

You touch his knee lightly with your hand. "Spencer, you know you can be yourself around me, right? I like you, not some really odd persona."

He's blushing, more from your confession than embarrassment. "You like me?" He squeaks.

"I do." You assure him. "Real you, though. Can I have him back?"

"Yes." He nods quickly. "You can."

[starsaviour48]

For a request how about Arcee and June hanging out with each other?

Two girl bosses coming right up.

The space bridge opened and a clearly upset and muddy Arcee stepped through it.

"Wow soooo the scouting didn't went well." said Wheeljack while jumping out off Arcee's way.

The blue femme turned around slowly and looked at her team with a murderous glare.

"You think?!? I had had enough doing you guys dirty work!" said Arcee and pointed to Bulkhead and Bumblebee who were the original team that should have done the mission.

"I'm also tired of your remarks like do you always feel the need to point out the obvious?"

It was Ratchet's and Wheeljack turn to be the target off Arcee's rage.

"And you..." Arcee turned to Smokescreen but realised that this time she has nothing on the rookie.

Smokescreen just lifted his servos in defence.

"I will just cross something off the list "Why Arcee is angry at me this time""

"Good."

Optimus turned to Arcee to offer her an olive branch as the human saying goes.

"You should take this day off. You deserve it."

"Damn right I do."

Having the day off is one thing, doing something with it is another. After a good oil bath provided by Bee and Bulk as apology for their overworked teammate she had no idea what to do. She tried to go to the training room but Smokescreen stopped her saying that she has the day off and training isn't the way to spend such a rare opportunity. On one hand she agreed with him but still...

"I heard of a human activity that you should try!"

"You having an idea? You scare me Smokescreen."

"Ha ha ha. I'm starting to think you enjoy bickering with me."

"Believe me I have a better way to spend my time than being in your company."

"Yeah? Like how?"

Arcee opened her intake to answer her teammate but closed it the moment she realised that she had nothing worthy to mention. Still she tried because she was stubborn after all.

"Watching cartoons with Bee, you and the kids. Have you forgotten?"

"No but you must have forgotten that me and Bee literally dragged you with us to watch anything. So no that doesn't count."

Arcee sighed.

"Fine. You win this time. What is that activity you mentioned."

Smokescreen smiled before explaining Arcee the beauty of slumber parties.

"I will...think about it." is all Arcee said before waving goodbye to the younger bot.

June was looking at Arcee who seemed to be out off it. The nurse thought that although Arcee was Jack's guardian they didn't really spoke a lot. Maybe it was time to change that.

"Everything's okay Arcee? You look...lost."

Arcee stopped walking in circles and looked at June.

"Yes of course Miss-"

"Call me June."

"June. Everything's fine. It's just... This will sound weird but do you know how to have a slumber party?"

June blinked up at the femme. Yeah something is definitely up with the serious bot.

"Do you know what a slumber party is Arcee?"

"If I can trust in Smokescreen than yes I know. He said it would be a great way to relax."

June weighted the pros and cons of having a slumber party with a giant alien robot before answering.

"I think I can help with that!"

Arcee looked a little bit confused. At that June raised a brow.

"I was young once too you know."

The Darby house wasn't really unknown for Arcee especially their garage. However all this colorful and eye catching human things made a place look somewhat foreign.

"What colour do you want for your nails?"

"Let's go with pastel pink." hummed Arcee after a little thinking.

June carefully started painting her digits. Arcee didn't really have nails but she said it was okay to paint the end off her digits.

"Sooo do you have a bot you like?"

That question took Arcee off guard. Although Smokescreen told her that human girls mostly talk during this custom but she didn't expected June to ask something like that out off the blue.

"Not really. I mean I had a little crush on Cliff, nothing serious. And you?"

June chuckled at that.

"Well to be honest Mr. FBI agent is quite the looker but I don't think Jack would approve."

"Just give him time. He will accept it."

"You think?"

"He will understand. He loves you more than you can imagine. If you are happy he won't stand in the way of that happiness." smiled Arcee softly.

It was a rare moment they shared and the femme has to admit it was nice. Really nice.

"What do you think off your teammates? You can tell me anything. My lips are sealed." smiled mischievously the nurse.

"Good question."

"Who's your favourite?"

"I have to say Bumblebee. He is like a little brother to me. He has quite the temper and can be childish from time to time but he is a great bot with endless potential."

"Who would you spend a week with?"

"Hmm... Bulkhead I think. He is a good travelling partner and he has a lot of stories. I have to admit that he isn't the sharpest tool in the shed but he means well."

"Who would be your shopping partner."

"Definitely Ratchet. He knows what he needs and he will do it swiftly. He is a really grumpy and straight forward bot but he puts life above all else and I respect him a lot."

"Who is your bff?"

"You wouldn't believe it but after the whole you aren't fit to be an autobot fiasco I would say Smokescreen."

"Really? I thought you guys are... you know...have bad blood between you two."

"Not really. After a long talk provided by Optimus we came to terms with eachother. Since than we like to goship, you wouldn't believe how much info the kid has it's honestly entertaining to listen to all the "beef" in the elite guard. He can be annoying sometimes but he is just a kid after all."

"Who would you live with?"

"Can I say humans too?"

"Sure."

"Than Jack. It's kinda obvious why."

"I'm glad my son has such a great friend like you." smiled June.

"I'm also happy that I met him."

"Next question. Who would you go on a vacation with."

"Wheeljack. He knows how to party and relax. He is also fun to be around. We are the lone wolf companions. Also he has a spaceship so we could visit some interesting planets too."

"What about Optimus and Ultra Magnus?"

"Well they are like the bosses of me so I wouldn't be that comfortable with them as I'm with the others. Although I would definitely go to a museum with Optimus. He has great knowledge on Cybertron after all. But I think I would drink the Cybertronian equivalent of coffee with Magnus."

The rest of the night went with decorating Arcee with various colorful items and chatting. If Arcee showed up tomorrow with a flower crown on her helm and pink digits nobody said a thing.

Bonus:

"Pink is soooo your colour. Have you ever thought on a new paint job?"

"I would paint myself pink but than I would have to constantly explain myself to Ratchet and Optimus as to why I have so much energon on me."

"So you have been walking around the base coverd in energon but because of your base colour we could see it?"

Arcee nodded and Smokescreen chuckled.

"Savage."

[quill-pen]

I saw a relationship TikTok, and got inspired, and churned this out. Enjoy, fellow Scroogians and Bess stans!

Rated T for some language, innuendo, and emotional abuse/manipulation.

Warnings: Barely edited. Let's walk on the wilder side!

Synopsis: A bachelor party is supposed to be a man's last night of freedom. At least, that's what society claims.

Freedom: A Timeless Scroogeverse ficlet

Bess bit down on her tongue to try and quell the torrent of annoyance bubbling up inside of her. She gripped her notepad so tightly her knuckles turned white. "Oliver, please?" she beseeched her fiancé for what must have been the fiftieth time in the last hour. "Can we try to focus on getting some wedding planning done right now? Even just the basics?" She tried to keep her tone even and non-accusatory, but still serious to let the young man know she was serious.

Olive seemed to have not heard her as he continued to focus solely on his game. "Oh-hooooo! Get rekt, bitch-ass!" He blew some rival player in half and leveled up. "Boo-yah! Sorry, babe, what were you saying?"

Bess was just about ready to grab the gaming system, the headphones, and the controller, and chuck the whole thing out the window, but then she would be sans all of it considering it was hers, so she refrained. "Oliver, honey, please!" Fifty-one. "Just give me fifteen minutes--even ten. Just to jot down some ideas for our wedding or get some dos and don'ts."

Oliver rolled his eyes as he released a heavy, long-suffering sigh. "I thought the wedding planning was all the girl's thing," he grumbled as he began to jump into another level.

"I mean, yeah, it's kinda turned into that, unfortunately. But I don't want it to be that way with us; we're both getting married, after all--it's both our wedding. We should both have a say." She sat in silence for a minute and waited to see if he would respond. None came. Typical. Bordering on desperation, Bess reached out, paused the game, and moved to stand in between Oliver and the screen. Then she grabbed the controller from his hands and sat it out of the way.

Oliver glared at her. "Hey!" he snapped. "What the hell, Specks--I'm playing! I'm going for the record of most kills in an hour!"

"And you can go back to that after we get some basics covered," Bess shot back, glowering right back at him. "We need at least six months to get stuff ready for the wedding, Oliver--we've put this off long enough. We need to have stuff decided by the end of February."

"Ugh! Fine! Anything to make you stop bitching and leave me alone!"

Bess felt a familiar twinge in her soul at those words and for a moment her resolve wavered. But she stayed. "Have you decided what color you want?

"Sure. Green."

The girl gave him a flat look. "Really?"

Oliver gave her a questioning look. "What? What's wrong with green."

"Nothing. Except I know your favorite shade of green and considering my color is yellow, we might as well just have John Deere decorate the entire thing for us."

Oliver's eyes sparked with an idea. "Hey, you think maybe-"

"No, I don't think they'd actually do it. Not that it matters because it wouldn't happen on my watch anyway."

Oliver crossed his arms stubbornly and stuck his nose in the air. "Well, if I can't have my green, you can't have yellow."

Bess shrugged. "Fine. We'll go secondary colors. Mine's lavender."

"Camo."

"We're not having camo for a wedding color."

"Why not?"

"A) It's not a color--it's a pattern. B) You don't even like the cool-looking camo--you like the ugly, realistic type hunters wear. C) If we have camo at our wedding, you and your buddies are gonna be making invisibility jokes the whole ceremony and reception, and I'm gonna wanna bash your heads in for it."

"Aw, come on, Specks. Just think about it: Me in a camo tux and my best man looking around all confused and going, "Who's she supposed to be marrying?" It would get so many laughs! Classic!"

"Ha-ha, yeah, no--you're not getting camo. Pick a color."

"Fine. Brown."

"Okay. Lavender and brown--those are nice, we can totally work with them."

Oliver sighed. "Great," he grumbled. "We got the colors figured. Can I play my game now?"

"It's my game because I bought it with my money, and no, not just yet. We still need to decide on our parties."

"What's there to decide? We're havin' 'em. Ain't nothin' gonna stop me from getting my bachelor party, I'll tell ya that right now."

"Fair enough."

Oliver snorted in superiority. "Hmph! Like I was 'bout to be cheated outta my strippers--yeah, right."

Bess paused in her notetaking. An uncomfortable sensation settled in the pit of her stomach like a boulder and refused to leave. "S-St-Strippers?" she just barely managed to croak out. She continued to stare at her notepad, unable to find the strength to look up at her fiancé. She felt her cheeks flush with heat.

"Of course," Oliver answered unashamedly, dismissively. "What else would you have at a bachelor party?"

Bess gnawed on her bottom lip, anxiously tapping the tip of her pencil against the notepad. "Uh--ahem!--a-are you s-sure you want strippers?" she asked, her voice sounding meek, small, and pathetic. Fitting--she felt pathetic.

Oliver threw back his head in a biting laugh at that question. "Specks, that's what a bachelor party's for! That's the only thing it's for! Why have one otherwise if you can't hire hot babes to get naked and grind on your lap? It'd be a waste of money! Besides, strippers at bachelor parties are tradition, and you know how I am about tradition."

Bess finally lifted her head just enough to peek out at the boy from underneath her hair. "You think traditions are stupid and meaningless," she pointed out quietly.

Oliver's eyes widened a bit and his face flushed; he'd been caught out. "Ahem! Well... I-I've changed my mind." His momentary flummoxing faded away and he looked confident and cocky again. "I mean, I am an engaged man after all--I'm growing." He reached around Bess and grabbed up the controller again. "Now, can we be done, Specks? Racing the clock for my record-breaking moment here." He grabbed Bess by the arm and rather forcefully pulled her out of the way of the computer. For added measure, he gave her a rather hard swat on the rump to send her on her way. "Love ya, babe. Mind makin' me a snack?"

Bess staggered a few steps away with a yelp. She reached around to rub her stinging buttock, and stood there a moment in a daze, still processing the conversation. Then she turned back to her fiancé. "O-Oliver?" she stammered voice still quieter than she would have liked. "Ollie... I-I think we need to talk more. A-About this stripper thing?"

"You volunteering to find some good strippers for me?" Oliver asked over his shoulder. He was already back to sprinting through the map to locate his next target. "'Cuz otherwise, I gotta rely on Mack and the guys, and you and I both know he's kinda an idiot for stuff like this and might get duped into hiring some fat, old, slobby wannabes looking to make a quick buck through Craig's List or some shit. I don't want wannabes--I want real, professional strippers."

Bess stared at him for a long moment, not quite believing what she was hearing. Oliver had never been particularly empathetic or even that great of a guy, but to ask her--his betrothed--to "find him some good strippers" for his bachelor party? This seemed like an entirely new layer of scummy Bess had yet to encounter. "I..." Bess began, then stopped. She tried to think of what to say: She wasn't always the greatest at putting her feelings into words Oliver could understand. "Oliver... I don't like the idea of strippers."

"That's okay. You don't have to watch them."

"Oliver, me watching them is not the problem; you watching them is what I don't like."

Oliver paused his game and swiveled around to look at his fiancée. "That right?" he asked, a certain edge to his voice.

Bess felt her anxiety spike with that tone. "I-It makes me uncomfortable," she stuttered, gripping her notepad tight and close to her chest, almost as if it were a shield. "The idea of you watching and getting rubbed on by naked women that aren't me... it feels... gross."

Oliver looked her up and down, his face unfathomable. That just made Bess more nervous. "Okay," he said after a moment with a non-committal shrug. "So, I'll tell the girls they can't get naked and rub up on me."

Bess shook her head. "That's not really the point--naked or scantily clad, I don't like the idea of you interacting with other women in any kind of sexual manner. It makes me feel... disrespected."

Oliver was tensely quiet for a minute. "So... what else do you think I should do instead?" he pressed, an angry bit to his voice. "If you're too insecure to trust me around other women?"

Bess felt tears sting her eyes at that accusation. "Ollie, I do trust you-"(at least she tried her best to)"-I just don't see why you need attention like that from any other women but me. I don't need it from any other guys but you." The girl prayed her fiancé would see her case; the idea of going on much longer with this conversation was a nightmare.

"I don't need it," Oliver corrected her. "I want it."

That doesn't make it better. "But why?"

"Because I'm a dude, Specks: I like it. Besides, don't I deserve to be treated real good on my last night of freedom?"

Bess was at a loss as to what to say to that. "I-I-I-"

"Look, babe, just because you're not as hot as a stripper doesn't mean you gotta worry me being snatched away by one of 'em okay?" Oliver's voice was infuriatingly patronizing. "After all, everyone knows you don't get caught up with a nine or ten. The fours through sixes are the marriage material girls." The boy had the audacity to wink up at her with a smirk. "And I've got my cute little five picked," he stated. "Ain't nothin' changing that."

Bess had never felt more disgusted. Or disgusting. She knew, objectively, she didn't rank above average in attractiveness and, even then, wasn't on the higher end of average either. But to learn that her own fiancé--the man she was about to marry and spend the rest of her life with--didn't even find her above average subjectively? The girl felt as gutted as a dead fish.

"O-Oliver... please..." she tried to continue, trying to hide her heartbreak and humiliation, "... I really don't think-"

"Oh, my god!" Oliver suddenly erupted, his face going dark. "It's not that big a deal--just let it go, Bess! Shit, you can be so controlling, ya know that? It's not my problem you feel like a fugly cow and can't handle other girls giving me attention!"

Bess stepped back in wide-eyed surprise. Oliver had never snapped at her quite like that before! A slight sting burning in her eyes, the dark-haired girl shook her head and started pleading: "O-Ollie, p-please-"

"It's my last night of freedom before I get stuck with you for the rest of my life--it's not gonna hurt anything to just let me have this one thing for one night. It's not like I'm gonna have it ever again! Jesus--Mom warned me about you being a bridezilla: Can't believe she was right! How fucking entitled are you to think you have any say in how I spend my last night of freedom?"

"You're right!" Bess suddenly blurted, desperate to get him to calm down. His yelling was quickly turning her nerves raw. "Y-You're completely right. I don't have any right to tell you how to plan your bachelor party or any say in what you do for it. It's your special night, and you deserve to be treated... y-you deserve to be treated."

The thundercloud that had quickly arisen in Oliver's eyes just as quickly evaporated away. He smiled rather triumphantly. Even smugly. "Glad you're finally seeing reason, Specks," he crooned. "I was afraid we were gonna have to call everything off. I'm not about to be stuck in a toxic relationship like some lame-ass chump. Love ya and everything, babe, but Oliver Sprague ain't no fucking simp!" He spun back around to start up his game again. "Now I need some peace and quiet, babe. Still got time to beat the record if I move fast enough!"

Left in a welling, dizzying pool of emotions, Bess simply turned to leave without a word, shutting the door behind her. Then, before she knew it, she was running, sprinting down the hall to the bathroom. With no time to lift the toilet lid, she lunged for the tub and spewed into it violently, painting the slick, off-white surface with partially digested food. She heaved over and over again until her stomach decided it was empty enough and wouldn't send anything else up.

Coughing and panting, tears and snot streaming down her face, Bess fumbled with one hand towards the faucet and turned the water on full bore. She changed to the shower setting to wash her puke down the drain. Then, exhausted and overwhelmed with emotions, the young woman collapsed against the side of the tub and sobbed. "I can't do this! I can't do this! I can't do this! I can't do this!"

Bess had never felt more trapped than while hearing her fiancé talk about his last night of freedom.

Bess stopped at the bottom of the steps to, once again, check the contents of the basket over her arm. For a brief moment, she feared she forgot the mustard, but, after double checking underneath a stack of napkins she thought she might have placed over the jar, she was reassured she hadn't and that everything was in its place. Whistling a little tune to herself, the woman mounted the steps and entered the two-story, Victorian-age, brick bank. The electronic tone announcing her arrival chimed throughout the floor.

"Be with you in just a moment!" a female, American voice called out.

Bess smiled as she turned her attention to the desk tucked behind a partition to her right. Behind the half-wall, sat a familiar copper-colored bun skewered with a pair of pencils in front of a computer monitor. "Hey," Bess greeted as she approached the desk. "Anybody order lunch?" She sat the basket on the desk and beamed ear to ear as that copper ponytail and the woman it was attached to rocketed around in her swivel chair to face her. "Hey, Con."

Her former housemate and best friend, Constance DoGoode (soon to be Scrooge) grinned back at her. "Did you say 'lunch'?" she asked.

Giggling, Bess reached in and pulled out a wax-paper-wrapped bundle. "Know anybody around here who likes toasted bagel sandwiches with salmon, avocado, arugula, cheddar, pickles, and tomato?"

Connie was immediately reaching for the paper-wrapped sandwich. "Oh, my goodness, I love you!" she exclaimed. "I'm famished! You'd be surprised how hungry inputting and adding up numbers can make you!"

"I have a feeling it'd just piss me off," Bess snorted as she watched her sister figure rip off the wax paper and chomp with a crunch into her sandwich. A little wave of anxious anticipation twinged through her. "How is it?"

Eyes closed, Connie raised a hand and slowly chewed her bite of sandwich. Finally, she swallowed. "This..." she began, slowly looking up at her friend with a bright grin, "... has got to be the best thing you've ever put together, Bess!" She dove back in for another bite. "Oh my god--so good!"

Relief washed over the dark-haired woman. "I tried something a little different this time. Gal asked me to help her come up with some new condiments and sauces for the cafe and pub. I decided to try a peppercorn mayo and I used it on your sandwich. What do you think? Any good?"

"Amazing!" Connie exclaimed around a mouthful of sandwich. "It adds the perfect little zing to everything; just the right amount of heat."

Bess beamed. "Good. Oh, and there's this." She reached again into the basket and pulled out a brown lunch sack. "There's some dessert in here, and a couple jalapeño poppers leftover from what I made for dinner last night with Wolf and Carl. And..." she reached in again and brought forth a little thermos decorated in cute, smiling cartoon suns and sunflowers, "... some pink lemonade that Mr. Cobblebottom brought over this morning." She sat both the thermos and sack down and pushed them towards Connie.

The redhead smiled up at her. "You're the greatest, ya know?" she remarked affectionately. "An absolute gem. Have I told you that lately?"

Bess smirked mischievously. "You could stand to mention it more," she teased with a playful wink. She turned her head in the direction of the back-office space and found it was empty. "The boys?" she inquired, raising an eyebrow at Connie.

Connie quirked an eyebrow towards the ceiling in indication. "Surprise business meeting."

There was suddenly a sound like the scraping of chairs on floors and the clattering of footsteps overhead.

"Sounds like they're done," Connie stated. "Right on time."

Bess turned her attention to the small stairwell on the left side of the room to see a group of people she recognized as the Scrooges' business associates and didn't know by name, come streaming out. Out with them came Bob, Ebenezer, and Ebenezar. The men were all still talking to one another, relaying their last opinions about whatever they'd been discussing, settling plans, and recounting short anecdotes.

A particularly short, round little man with a purple-red complexion and a walrus mustache was monopolizing Bess' dear Ebenezar's--or Wolf's--attention. "Listen, Benny-boy," he was saying, his voice a bit louder and more boisterous than the others, "all I'm saying is I've known you and your brother a long time--practically since you started in this business when old Marley hired you boys. I found out about your brother's wedding too late to put forth my candidacy to be the Best Man, but I'm not too late to do it for your wedding."

Wolf was looking rather annoyed (accurate, considering he hated anyone but those closest to him to refer to him as "Benny-boy"--and even then, he only liked to hear it from Magda) and uncomfortable. "That's most generous of you, Mr. Tittersmyth," he replied, trying to be as polite as possible. "But my brother is going to fill that roll."

Mr. Tittersmyth wasn't giving up. "Wait, wait--I haven't finished yet," he stated, completely unfazed. "As your best man, I'll make sure you get to have as much say in your wedding preparations as possible; because I'll be honest with you, my boy, women? You have to do battle to wrest any sort of control from them when it comes to a wedding! Otherwise, you're going to end up with a frilly, frou-frouy, powderpuff wedding that focuses solely on your bride, and you're just standing there beside her like a well-dressed doorstop. The very idea of a wedding--of a marriage--caters almost exclusively to the feminine sensibilities. We men have to fight for our voices to be heard or risk losing our very identity! Trust me, I know. Happened at my first two weddings; Everything was what my brides wanted--I was lucky to choose what color I wanted, and even then, I was given options to pick from. I don't know why neither of them liked my first choice: Pea green goes quite well with magenta and lilac, wouldn't you say so, Ben?"

Wolf looked at a complete loss for words. He began to flicker his gaze around the room to find something--anything--to use as a life-preserver in this sinking conversation. Instantly, his eyes fell on Bess. Immediately the banker lit up like a supernova, his fake smile turning into a genuine grin, his eyes softening with adoration and sparkling with joy. "Bess! My beautiful, wonderful darling!" he practically laughed. He strode towards her, looking like he was trying very hard to not break into a run to get away from Mr. Tittersmyth. In just a few strides of his long legs, the man was sweeping the woman up into his embrace and kissing her fully, unabashedly, somewhat gratefully.

Bess squeaked in some alarm at the sudden onslaught of blatant affection with such a professional audience in the room, but then she much too easily sunk into it. Her insides liquified to mush that bubbled and tickled in the most delightful way. She held her man's jaw in her hands to keep him close and let her eyes drift shut as she angled deeper into the kiss. The Yank felt breathless and lighter than air.

"Well, golly," Bess giggled when they finally broke the lip-lock. "What a welcome. Do you greet everyone who shows up in your office like that?"

"If this business deal goes off as planned," one of the associates stated with a chuckle, "I'll greet all of you boys like that next time I come in here." She sent a wry smirk Ebenezer's and Bob's way. A wink followed.

Bob blinked at the woman before turning to Ebenezer. "I feel like there's a threat in there somewhere," he stated only half-jokingly.

Ebenezer laughed awkwardly. He laid a hand on Bob's shoulder and gently ushered him away from the woman.

"What are you doing here, Brightness?" Wolf inquired, quirking a bushy brow. "I wasn't expecting you."

Bess shrugged within his arms. "Well, this morning, when you mentioned we probably wouldn't be able to go out for lunch because of all the work you had to get done, and that you probably wouldn't be going out for a lunch break at all, I decided I'd bring lunch to all of you."

"Isn't she just the greatest?" Connie chirped from behind her desk. She was never one to let a moment of praise for her loved ones slip by.

Wolf's eyes softened to a heartbreaking degree as he gazed upon the woman in his arms. "Yes," he agreed, speaking just loudly enough for his fiancée to hear. "The greatest, most amazing, most spectacular woman."

Bess blushed.

"Bess, you didn't have to do this," Ebenezer stated with an affectionate smile.

The dark-haired woman shrugged. "I know," she stated. "But it's no biggie. I'm off shift today and had the time. Besides, I enjoy cooking and making sure my people are taken care of." She smiled adoringly up at her fiancé who, in turn, bowed his head and touched his brow to hers. She bit back another girlish giggle.

"How utterly... traditional and domestic," the female associate replied. It was probably meant as a compliment, but the way she said it with such apparent disgust made it hard to take in a positive way. "I should go--my driver's waiting. I'll see you boys next time." She shook hands with Ebenezer and Bob (as well as rather coyly straightening his lapels and picking a piece of lint off his shoulder with rather suggestive finger movements) but bypassed Wolf altogether. For a second, she paused in front of the embracing couple as if in contemplation, then, with a look of distaste, moved on out the door.

The other associates slowly filtered out after her, all saying goodbye to the boys and the girls as well. A few slapped both Scrooge twins on the back with quiet little remarks along the lines of "You lucky fools," as they unashamedly ogled the women. Eventually, the only associate left in the room with the group of friends was old Mr. Tittersmyth. The stocky little man--a good two to three inches shorter than both Connie and Bess--approached the Wolves, his beady little eyes trained solely on Bess.

Seeing a hunger in his gaze, Bess shifted closer to her beloved, feeling even safer when his grip on her tightened and he moved a bit to stand between her and the man. Her grip on Wolf's waistcoat tightened as she pressed into his side.

"Well, well, well," Mr. Tittersmyth chuckled. "I've seen her pictures in the news, but are you going to finally introduce me to your pretty little vixen, Ben old boy?" The little businessman rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet, looking much too eager for either Bess or Wolf's tastes.

The couple exchanged a look. Wolf was uncertain, as he didn't want to introduce his bride-to-be to such a lecher as he knew Mr. Tittersmyth to be. However, as lecherous as he could be, Tittersmyth was most definitely an important cog in the London business world and could either make future business proceedings and philanthropic ventures easier for the Scrooges, or much, much harder depending on if they pleased or displeased him; Tittersmyth was known to be excessively petty. Of course, despite all that, Bess' comfort and desires were the number one concern for Wolf, how ever Tittersmyth might end up feeling.

Picking up on her fiancé's silent inquiry, Bess smiled and nodded. Not that it didn't make her skin crawl, but she could make acquaintance with the old man. For the future her future husband and brother-in-law wanted, she could play nice with an old creep.

Wolf returned her small smile and nodded back. "Mr. Tittersmyth," he sighed, trying not to sound reluctant as he looked back at his associate, "this is my fiancée--Bess Sullivan."

"Bess," Tittersmyth repeated, his voice low and growly. He seemed to taste and savor her name, enunciating slowly and dragging out the 's' as though he were a snake. "What a lovely name."

Bess shivered. "Thank you," she replied quietly. Somehow, she managed to keep a smile on her face.

Wolf's fingers on her waist tightened. "Bess, Darling," he continued on, voice sounding a bit strained as he tried to keep civil, "this is an old associate of the business, Mr. Richard Tittersmyth."

"A pleasure," Tittersmyth said, extending a hand toward Bess. "You may call me 'Dick', Love." He gripped the woman's hand tightly when she placed it in his.

"That's kind," Bess returned as politely as she could. Her stomach lurched when she recognized that the man was going in to kiss her knuckles and wrenched her hand from his grip. "But I'm afraid I'm not comfortable with that, seeing as we just met, Mr. Tittersmyth."

Tittersmyth didn't seem a bit put out or fazed. Instead, his gaze grew darker as he leered again up at Bess, and he chuckled. "Feisty young thing," he remarked, folding his hands behind his back. "Knows her mind, I think." He took a step closer, angling to move around Wolf and get closer to Bess.

"That she does," Ebenezer cut in. He stepped in between Tittersmyth and his brother, as his twin--while pulling Bess further behind him--had now dropped his congenial mask and looked like he wanted to reach out to knock the fat little encroacher clean off his feet. "Bess is quite a self-assured woman of conviction."

"Ah, all the more reason to have me as your best man, wouldn't you say, Benny-boy?" Tittersmyth chuckled looking around one brother to the next. "I can make sure this pretty thing doesn't run roughshod over you with the planning." A sly smirk curled the man's lips, making his walrus mustache arch into grin. "And, uh, should it happen that your little woman needs some... extra entertainment-" he winked up at the tall billionaire rather conspiratorially, "-I'd be more than obliged to offer my assistance."

Bess felt both offended and nauseous at once. Bob spluttered on another thermos of lemonade he'd snuck over to take from the basket. Connie made a disgusted exclamation before clamping a hand over her ruby red lips. Ebenezer went white and glanced back over his shoulder at his brother.

Wolf looked borderline murderous, face red with that infamous vein popping and pulsing along his temple, jaw clenched so tight his teeth grinded, mouth and eyes drawn narrowly, hands clenching tight into a fist and onto Bess. He actually snarled, but only loud enough for both his brother and Bess to hear. The man made to move towards the little cad, but the tightening of his fiancée's grip and the shifting of his brother to stand even more in between Tittersmyth and himself stopped him. "I've been in the saunas with you, Tittersmyth," Wolf spat. "The only way you could possibly entertain Bess would be in the comic sense. Otherwise you would be of very pitiful and little assistance."

Bess bit her lip and shoved her face into Wolf's side to try and fight back the laughter that response threatened to summon from deep inside her. Connie snorted a bit, herself, and quickly swiveled around to face her computer to hide her goofy face.

Tittersmyth didn't even blink. He launched immediately into raucous laughter, grabbing at his round, jiggling belly. "HAAAAhahahaha! Oh, Ben! Good old Benny-boy! You always were the best one for wit and jokes." The little man, met Bess' eyes as she peeked out from her man's side and winked at her as he jutted a finger towards Wolf. "He's always liked to tease me, this one," he stated with a wide grin. "He can cut to the quick with it sometimes, but I know he's fond of me. Aren't you, Benny-boy?"

"As fond as two like magnetic poles."

That just made Tittersmyth laugh harder. "What a laugh you are, Ben!" he exclaimed as he slipped his hat on and turned to leave. "What a laugh!"

He was about to walk out the door when he paused and turned back to the group. "Just saying, Ben," he said, a singsong in his voice, "have me as your best man, and I'll get you the best exotic dancers for your stag."

If it were possible, Wolf's face flushed even darker red as his whole body went rigid. "Leave. This. Instant!" he barked savagely.

Tittersmyth did not drop his jovial smile. "Just keep it in mind, my boy." And with that, the codger finally left, whistling jauntily as he went.

The tension finally eased out of the air as Tittersmyth faded from view.

Sighing heavily in weariness, Wolf relaxed in Bess' grip and turned his full attention back to her. "I'm so sorry you were subjected to that... indecorous manner, Brightness," he murmured regretfully. The man lifted a large hand and gently brushed a curl of hair from his lover's face before stroking the backs of his fingers along her jawline as she gazed up at him. He felt the anger and irritation melt away as he gazed into those velvety, midnight eyes of hers. "I was hoping to prepare you a bit more for your first meeting with Tittersmyth, instead of having him thrust upon you like today."

Bess smiled reassuringly up at him. Standing up on tip-toe, she cupped his jaw in her hands and pressed a soft kiss to his cheekbone. "It's okay," she assured him, nuzzling the kiss in. "It wasn't your fault. You didn't know I was coming to try and warn me away."

Wolf hugged her tighter. "I am happy you came, though," he whispered as he nuzzled her back. "I'm happy you're here." A kiss was pressed tenderly to her brow.

Bess giggled and gently pulled away from him and out of his grip, grabbing his large hands in hers as she did. "Well, you'll be even happier when you see the lunch I brought you. No working on empty tummies today, boys. There's plenty for everyone." She led her fiancé to the basket sitting on the desk that the other two men and Connie were back to investigating.

The next hour or so was filled with warm laughter and camaraderie as the group took up chairs and lunched together, both ladies opting to take seats in their respective fiancés' laps. The men quickly filled the women in on what the meeting had been about, then spent the rest of the time chattering and laughing about the bank's associates. (Tittersmyth, of course, was a particular target for mockery.) The bank was filled with good vibes and cheer.

Even so, as Bess sat in Wolf's lap, laughing with the others and teasing him by snitching off his food and drink, she felt a familiar sensation niggling deep in her stomach--one she hadn't felt for a long time. Tittersmyth's comment about exotic dancers kept playing through her head: No matter how hard she tried to push it down and forget about it, she simply couldn't. And that was what brought back the old feelings of disgust, anxiety, and inadequacy. She was starting to feel exactly as she had when she'd been engaged to Oliver. And no matter how hard Bess tried to reassure herself that her amazing Wolf was nothing like Oliver Sprague, the feelings simply would not leave her in peace.

Bess sat at the dining room table in Wolf's penthouse flat. The beautiful mahogany table had, yet again, been turned into a wedding planning station, just as it had every other night since they'd gotten engaged. While initially intimidated by the process as her first attempt with it had been a complete nightmare (ending in a bad breakup), the woman had quickly come to enjoy the process. There was something incredibly satisfying and confidence-boosting about making and solidifying wedding plans. And when you actually had a partner that could be mature about it and actually wanted to participate in the process, it could even be fun. Bess had actually started to become excited for the planning sessions.

But not tonight.

Tonight, Bess' mind was racing to the point she felt sick. She was still thinking about Tittersmyth and his parting comment. She was still about exotic dancers and stag parties. Her fingers drummed out a nervous beat on the table while her feet tapped rapidly to keep up.

She tried to calm herself with the facts of the scene. Wolf had seemed extremely angry with that comment and had insisted Tittersmyth leave; even so, Bess' proclivity to overthink and be anxious refused to take comfort in that knowledge. What if he'd just gotten upset because Tittersmyth had mentioned the topic in front of her? Could it be possible Wolf actually wanted strippers for his stag? Pre-marriage parties and strippers seemed to go hand-in-hand--like it was some rite of passage or something. Bess had made it clear to her girls early on she was not into that scene: She wasn't the sort of woman that wanted to watch some random man strip down and give her a lap dance. She'd also thought Wolf wasn't that kind of man, but could she have been wrong? It was his stag party--his last night of freedom after all. It was a bit different than just going to a club some random night in the week to watch women get naked and ride poles: A stag was a special celebration for a man. Was it really that big a deal to celebrate with a naked woman who wasn't her so long as there was no funny business?

Bess didn't know how to answer that, she just knew it made her feel sicker than ever. Sicker even than when she'd gone through this fiasco with Oliver.

A hand suddenly gripped onto her shoulder, ripping the American from her thoughts and causing her to scream in alarm. She tried to whirl around to face whoever grabbed her, but she upset her chair in the process and toppled over. "Yipe!"

"Bess!" Wolf exclaimed. He quickly bent over her to help pick her up off the floor, concern etched in deep lines on his face. "Oh, Darling, are you all right? I'm so sorry, Brightness; I didn't mean to frighten you! Had I realized you were zoned out instead of merely focusing, I would have been gentler."

Still trying to calm her racing heart, Bess did her best to smile at her fiancé and brush off the situation. "No, it's okay," she assured him, rubbing her backside with only a slight grimace. "Zoning out, focusing--I look pretty much the same either way. And I had all the wedding stuff out, so it made sense you thought I was just focused. Oof! That's gonna bruise though."

Wolf gave her a sorrowful look. "I'm so sorry, Moonlight," he repeated gently. "Let me get you an icepack." He moved into the kitchen and dug into the freezer. "So, what was it?" he called over his shoulder.

"What was what?" Bess returned as she sat her chair upright and picked up a few papers that had scattered.

"What was it you were thinking so hard on that you zoned out?"

Bess' stomach twisted in anxiousness. She wasn't sure she was ready to have this conversation. "Oh... ya know. Things. Wedding business."

"I see," Wolf replied, folding the icepack up in a soft towel. "Wedding business." He sounded a bit skeptical. Coming back to the woman, he handed her the pack and watched quietly as she sat back down and settled the ice over her sore elbow. Then he gently pressed: "Could this be the same wedding business you were thinking about when you left the bank today?"

Bess looked up at him, hoping her surprise didn't show on her face. Really, it was uncanny how this man could read and understand her so easily. The only other man that had ever been able to do that was her stepfather. "Why do you think I was thinking of anything then?" she tried to avoid the question, attempting another smile.

Wolf wasn't convinced. "Oh, I don't know," he drawled. He grabbed another chair and drew it closer to sit beside his love. He straddled it and crossed his lanky arms over the top of the back before resting his chin on his forearms. The man gazed closely at the woman. "Maybe because you had that thousand-metre stare you only get when you're brain goes into overdrive and can't stop racing. Maybe because you grew steadily quieter during lunch and had to have things repeated more than once to you before you processed them. Maybe because you didn't answer Connie's "See you later, alligator". Maybe because my bloody brother made a ghastly pun and you didn't even snort."

Bess went silent, unable to think of any sort of explanation to give the man. She felt the color drain from her face as her guts knotted and unknotted continuously. Damn his intuition! But also bless it.

Wolf smiled empathetically and stood to move around his chair and kneel beside hers. Taking one of her hands in one of his, he covered the back of it from her fingertips to her wrist in kisses before holding it against his chest. He gazed up into her eyes, the slate-blue of his warm and liquid. "What is it, Brightness?" he whispered. "You can tell me anything--you know that."

Bess managed a tiny smile. "I know that," she said. She reached up with her free hand to cup the man's sculpted chin in her palm. She gently scruffed her fingers in his muttonchops. "You make me feel so safe, Moonsong."

Wolf chuckled warmly and let his free hand reach up to place atop hers and flatten it closer to his face. Turning into her hand, he kissed the wrist, heel, and palm before turning back to her fully again. "You are safe," he assured her, stroking both of her hands with his thumbs. "I promise you. You will always be safe with me, Bess--you understand that?"

Bess nodded as she felt the sting of tears in her eyes. In an attempt to control them, she screwed her eyes shut and leaned in to plant a kiss along her beloved's hairline before touching her brow to his and breathing deeply. Even in her present anxiousness, the Yank had never felt so safe and loved.

Wolf held steady, allowing his love a moment to collect herself and use him as the rock to anchor herself to do so. "Was it Tittersmyth?" he inquired quietly when Bess wasn't pressing so hard against him.

Bess sighed, not pulling away from the contact yet. "Yeah," she rasped, voice a little shaky. "But... not in the way you might think." Finally, the woman pulled away from her fiancé and gave him a somewhat sheepish look.

Wolf scowled and let his gaze fall dramatically away from Bess. "I'll have his hide," he rumbled. When Bess snorted and giggled at that his smile returned and he looked back at her. "What was it then, Darling?" he gently prodded. He let go of her hand on his cheek and reached up to brush some loose hair from her eyes. He ran his fingers back along the coal-black waves and drew her loose ponytail forward over her shoulder to gently play with and twirl the strands. Bess always seemed to calm down best when he played with her hair. "What do I need to skin Tittersmyth alive for?"

Again, Bess snorted and shook her head. "You don't need to skin the old fool alive."

"Ah, we don't know that yet."

Bess rolled her eyes and cast her glance over the expanse of wedding planning tools spread out over the table. The smirk dropped from her face as she traveled back, not just to this afternoon with Tittersmyth, but all those years ago with Oliver. "Wolf..." she croaked out after a long silence, "... do... do you want... strippers at your stag?"

The man's fingers froze in her hair. His hand around hers at his chest tightened its hold. "What?" he nearly scoffed the answer.

Bess felt the tears in her eyes again, but this time they weren't coming from a place of happiness and love. She couldn't bring herself to look at the man she loved. "Because..." she had to gulp down the lump building in her throat, "... i-if you do... y-you can. I-I'm not gonna lie and say I'll be ha-happy about it, but it's your stag party, so I... I can be okay with it if you want strippers." Her chin was suddenly taken in a firm but tender grip and her face brought 'round to meet eyes with Wolf again. She gulped again as she gazed deep into those slate depths she loved so much.

The man looked at her for a long time, as if studying her closely for the very first time. He looked slightly... perplexed. Disbelieving. "Would you?" he finally uttered, voice very quiet. "Would you be all right if I had dancers at my stag, Bess?" Somehow the question sounded a bit like a challenge. A challenge to what?

Bess drew her lips into a thin line and set her jaw against an oncoming sob that made her chest and throat tighten painfully. She tried to breathe through it. "I... I think I could be okay with it," she managed to croak out, her voice sounding pathetic and broken.

Wolf's soft eyes grew sad, and it quickly spread across the rest of his features. "Bess...."

"I-It's your last night as a free man, after all. You sh-should get to spend it h-how you like, yeah?" Bess' vision was starting to swim now.

Without another word or any warning, Wolf was taking his mate into his arms and embracing her tight to his chest. Cradling her head, he pressed his lips to her crown in a lingering kiss. The way she curled up into such a small ball against him and pressed so close as she quietly shed tears into his shirt could have shattered his heart. Wolf knew how much Bess hated feeling this way--small, meek, frightened. She thought it made her weak and she hated to be viewed as weak. Of course, Wolf never viewed her that way, but the feelings remained all the same.

"This wasn't just because of Tittersmyth's comment," the man murmured after a moment when Bess' breathing seemed to have evened a bit. He stroked large hands over her hair and up and down her back in soothing strokes. "This was an issue with Oliver, wasn't it?"

Bess croaked out a laugh. She pressed her face deeper into his chest and moaned wearily as she gently smacked his shoulder. "Ugh. How do you always know?"

Wolf couldn't help the little chuckle that escaped him in turn. "Just lucky, I suppose." His fiancée snorted and he smiled, glad she was in slightly better spirits.

"Bess, my sweetest moondust," he went on after a moment, voice soft and low, "you wouldn't be all right with strippers at my stag party." It wasn't a question.

Bess sniffled and shook her head against his chest. "No."

"Then why say you would be?" He was sure he knew the answer, but even so, Wolf wanted to hear her say it. Bess being able to voice her feelings and have them listened to and taken seriously helped her to realize that her emotions and thoughts were valid--that she was valid.

Slowly, Bess pulled away from his embrace to sit back and face him again. She reached up to wipe away her tears and smiled when the man did as well, stroking her cheekbone and the inside of her nose with his thumb. It still amazed her how any man besides her stepfather could be so gentle and caring in every possible way with her.

"Bess?"

"Oliver... made a stink when I told him I didn't like the idea of strippers at his bachelor party."

Wolf made a quiet noise of derision in response to that. That fact didn't surprise him in the least bit.

"I tried explaining to him that, um... that the idea of him watching other women undress and having them g-get all up in his business... m-made me feel disrespected and gross." Bess made a dry laugh. "He didn't care. He was determined to get his strippers and who the hell was I to tell him what he couldn't and couldn't do for his bachelor party--his last night of freedom?" There was no mistaking the pain, anger, and betrayal in her own voice, even after all these years. Bess snorted at herself and buried her face in her hands. "I don't know why I'm still so upset about it. Moses, I'm so stupid!"

Wolf reached up and gently grabbed her wrists to pull her hands from her face. "No," he gently scolded. "Moonbeam, Darling, look at me." Her eyes came to his and he held her gaze as he shook his head. "No. We're not talking or thinking like that anymore, remember? We're going to feel what comes and acknowledge it, no matter how unreasonable it seems, yes?"

Bess sniffled and nodded. "Right. Because every emotion is valid," she repeated what their couple's counselor and told them many times. "Just not every action."

Wolf nodded. "So... did the rat bastard have his strippers?"

Bess scoffed and shrugged with a wry smirk. "Never made it that far. He wanted to celebrate his party the night right before our wedding. I'm sure he would've, though." Her voice dropped in a deeper register and took on a cartoonishly dim-witted drawl as was normal when she mocked and imitated her ex: "Like he was 'bout to be cheated outta his strippers."

Wolf chuckled at that, his gaze falling to their fingers as they absentmindedly played with each other, twining and untwining, playing out little battles of dominance. It was incredible how they just went together so easily--so naturally. It was something the billionaire had never suspected to have ever in his life. He wasn't about to let it go now. "Last night of freedom," he muttered, looking back up at Bess. "That's what Oliver called it?"

Bess nodded. "He made quite a point of it."

The man looked down at their entwined hands again, stilling his fingers to simply hold the woman he loved in the safety and security she deserved to have. How anyone could have ever treated her so harshly and cruelly as they had, he'd never understand. How Oliver Sprague had been able to two-time and betray her and not see the absolute blessing he had when he had her.... Perhaps it was a bit smug, but Wolf couldn't help but think that this is what was meant when the difference between boys and men was spoken of.

"Elizabeth Felicity Sullivan-Marley," he spoke after a moment, "my stag party would not be my "last night of freedom"." He looked up to find the eyes of his beloved focused completely on him and he smiled. "I haven't been a free man the moment you came into my life," he continued on. "And I certainly haven't been a free man since we became a couple." He brought her hands to his mouth again and kissed both of them with such sweet tenderness, Bess made that teary squeaky little whimper he loved to hear so much. Then he met her eyes again with all the sincerity in the world. "And I wouldn't have it any other way."

Bess' heart fluttered in the way only he could make it flutter. It wasn't the first time--she should have been more than used to it by now--but she still felt as giggly and mushy and freshly in love as she had since the first night they'd curled up in front of the woodstove kissing into the morning. (And then getting caught by George.) "Really?" she asked, slipping her bottom lip through her teeth. "You don't pine for the days of being a single man again? The freedom to do what you want when you want without regard for someone else?"

Wolf quirked up an eyebrow. "I'm not sure I ever really had that," he remarked with a smirk. He glanced at her hands again as she snickered and stroked his thumb over the little moonstone ring on her left hand. Never had a ring looked more natural or fetching on a woman. "No," he said, looking back to his fiancée. "I don't pine for a single moment where you wouldn't be in my life. Perhaps bachelorhood is freedom for other men... it was never that for me. With you... I've never felt more comfortable or free to be myself. When I'm with you, I feel secure to express myself in ways I previously thought I couldn't. What's more, I feel as though I actually have someone who cares about the things I say, think, feel, and do."

Bess smiled tenderly and reached up to stroke his cheek. "You do, my moonlight," she assured him. "I do care. I care about everything concerning you."

That did it. Overcome with emotion and acting purely on impulse, the man reached up to cup his mate's neck and pulled her in close until he could press his mouth to hers and kiss her soundly. He moved his lips in tandem with hers, a tingling warmth spreading throughout his body. Her smell and taste--even a bit salty with her tears--intoxicated him more than any alcohol ever could. If he jumped out the window of his top-floor flat, he was sure he would fly.

Finally, the pair broke the kiss, and Wolf brought his hand up to hold Bess' jaw. He traced his thumb over her rosy lips. His lips curled into a smile as the ethereal, luminescent beauty she always exuded shone tenfold as it always did when she was left enveloped in the haze of a kiss. "My most darling Bess," he whispered, voice husky, eyes soulful and dark, "being with you... that's my freedom."

Bess had no response to that other than to wrap her arms around the man's neck and kiss him deeply again. As he rose from the floor to stand, she wrapped her legs around his lithe waist and tangled her fingers into his hair, setting the silvery strands free from their horsetail. "Take me to bed, Ebenezar," she rasped against his lips. "Please."

The man had the cheek to smirk. "Are you going to strip for me, then?" he teased, biting his bottom lip in the way he knew Bess couldn't resist.

Bess gave him a saucy smile. "Just don't expect it for your stag, Handsome."

Wolf rumbled a growling chuckle and made his way toward the spiral stairs to the second floor. It seemed wedding planning would have to wait for the time being.

@rom-e-o @ray-painter @crimson-phantom-designs @purgratoriat @st0r-fruit @m0nsterwife @the-house-of-auditore-frye @oldmanlusting @christmasgaybusinessmen

[chemicalbrew]

smoliv is not a starter but i’m glad they bring u joy

oh i knew it but i keep forgetting about it. he's a starter in my HEART

[ally-writes-many-things]

Secret Voight (J. Halstead) S3 Part 2

Summary: Its been a year or so since you and Jay started dating. Justin's girlfriend shows up pregnant.

Words: 4.3k

Prompts:

Requested:

Warnings or A/N:

             You were sitting across from your dad at the table at his house, shaking your head at the ridiculous thing he had just said. "I'm pretty sure Jay and I are doing a pretty good job keeping our private lives separate from our work life?"

            "It not me who has a problem with it. It's the higher ups,"

             "Why is it any of their business who we date? We have not have ONE problem since we came public about our relationship? Have we?"

             "No but-"

             "Then there's no buts. Tell them to shove it up their ass and keep their noses out of other people's business,"

             "Y/N, calm down,"

            "No! They don't have right to tell us what to do in our private lives when we aren't on the clock,"

             Your dad didn't say anything for a few seconds but the doorbell rang. Voight got up to answer it but you were already on your feet, walking towards the door. "I got it. I'm leaving,"

             "Y/N!"

             You ignored him and walked to the front door and you opened it. You saw the girl from the precinct that was talking to Voight. "You're the girl from the precinct,"

             "Yeah....You must be Y/N? Justin's told me a lot about you,"

             You were confused as to who this girl is and who she is to Justin. "I'm sorry, who are you?"

             "Oh I'm sorry. I'm Olive,"

             You were still confused to who this girl is. You never heard Justin talk about this girl ever. "I'm sorry but Justin never told me about you? Don't take it personal. We never really talked unless it was yelling at each other,"

          "I'm carrying Justin's kid,"

             This threw you through a loop. You had no idea what people Justin was around and you for sure didn't know Justin was seeing someone. "Well, come on in. Dad's in the kitchen but I'm heading out. Nice to meet you,"

             ---

             You were in the break room when Jay comes over to you and plants a sweet but short kiss on your lips. "Hey babe,"

             You smiled but didn't say anything. He looked at you confused and you could tell he was reading you to figure out if something was wrong or not. "What's wrong?"

             You chuckled. "Oh, just the fact the high ups wants you to keep it in your pants,"

             Jay looked at you confused. "I didn't know I had it out?"

             "Apparently, you do cause you're dating a co-worker,"

           "What? We have never had our relationship interfering with our work?"

             "I know,"

         "What did Voight say?"

            "Nothing really just told me what they said,"

           "That's such bullshit,"

             Platt comes into the break room and looked at you then Jay and then back at you. "Voight missed a com stat meeting and they tried his cell but it went to voicemail,"

             You looked at her weird cause that wasn't like your dad. You nodded, walked out of the break room and walked over to your desk and pulled out your phone and called him but it also went to voicemail. "Got his voicemail too,"

             Jay walked out of the break room. "Maybe he got sick?"

             You look at him. "He never gets sick.

          "He had the flu last year,"

             You pulled your phone in your pocket. "No. You had the flu,"

             "He gets sick. Everyone gets sick,"

             You rolled your eyes. "Let's go check out his house,"

---

             You and Jay drove to your dad's house and you jumped out of Jay's truck and started walking up the driveway. "Car is out front,"

          You walked on the porch and knocked a few times but no one answered. You pulled out your keys that were in your pocket and unlocked the door. Jay went in behind you and noticed the back door was open. "Back door,"

          You looked over at the door and noticed your dad's phone on the ground busted. You walked down the stairs and there were a puddle of blood and the safe was completely empty.

             Jay pulls out of his phone and calls someone. "Antonio. Take me off speaker. Voight's missing and we found blood,"

           Antonio, Al and the rest of the team show up at his house in about twenty minutes later.    Antonio looked at Voight's phone. "Smashed his phone. So we couldn’t track it,"

             Jay looked at Antonio. "Figured two guys,"

           You looked over at the table and noticed two cups. "At least. Coffee's my dad's. The tea must've been for Olive,"

          "Whose Olive?"

             "The girl Justin got pregnant,"

             Antonio's head snapped to you. "Justin got a girl pregnant?"

             "Yeah, I just found out about it,"

             "So Voight's not the only one who got snatched,"

             While you were talking to Antonio with Jay. Ruzek and Al were in the basement trying to see what they can find and Atwater was looking outside to see if he could find anything out there. He finds a camera hidden in a street lamp.

   -

            After you and the team did what you could at Voight's house, you left and went to the unit. It took a few minutes to get the video from the camera and work out the timeline. Antonio call you guys over to his desk so you can watch the video. "Voight had cameras in the front and the back door. 7 this morning this girl arrives and you see Y/N leave-"

             "Yeah that's Olive,"

            Antonio nodded. "Olive arrives, then about ten minutes later at 7:30 two unknown offenders enter the back. Now we cant see if Voight or Olive lets them in but five minutes later, Olive is seen leaving. Ten minutes later, one of the male subjects escorts her back inside. Ten minutes after that, they leave out the back with the girl. They're carrying Voight out. He appears to be unconscious,"

           You take one last look at the camera before looking at Antonio. "You're thinking Olive is involved somehow?"

             "Looks like it. Do you know anything about this girl?"

            "No. Just that she's carrying Justin's child,"

             Jay stood up and looked at no one in particular. "We got to put out a message and get a city-wide search going,"

             Al walked into the unit after doing who knows what. "No, cause we don't knew what Voight was into. We're going get him home safe. We do it ourselves. We keep this in-house. The girl is Olive Morgan. It's a girl Justin dated when he was in town,"

             Antonio nodded and started typing away at his computer. "We got to run her through every database we got. See if her phone is active, get her family, credit cards. She could be connected to these two, whoever they are,"

             Jay slightly mocked the word. "Connected. For what it's worth, she could've set it up,"

            You looked over at your boyfriend. "If she did, she's gonna wish, she never stepped into Justin's and our lives.

             Antonio sighed. "You sound like your father. What's worse is that Ruzek doesn't think they're local. So he's trying something else,"

           You sighed and walk into the break room and leaned over the sink. You heard footsteps following but you didn't look. They placed a hand on your shoulder. "Are you okay?"

           You looked over and saw Dawson standing there. "No. I was there this morning,"

             "And what does that have to do with anything?"

             "If I just would've stayed-

             Dawson grabbed your shoulders and turned you to face him and leaned down to look at you at your eye level. "You could've been snatched too. You could've been hurt like Voight was. You do not get to blame yourself for this. This wasn't your fault,"

            "Antonio, I could've-"

           He cut you off. "No. You couldn't have took on two men with loaded weapons. Did you even have you service weapon on you?"

           "It was in the car,"

             "Y/N, this is not your fault and that the end of me hearing this, you got it?"       

            You nodded and Antonio pulled you in for a hug. You and Antonio always have this uncle/niece relationship going on. When you didn't feel like going to your dad for help or advice, you always called Antonio. "We'll find him,"

             You walked out of the break room as Ruzek came back in with a file in his hands.

"All right, the little guy- Ian Marks. LKA came back from Denver,"

Jay quickly types on his computer and within minutes had results. "I ran his name through the face the nation database. His family is nothing but crooks,"

            Dawson slammed his hands on his desk. "The head of this unit has been missing four hours already. We need more," While he was saying that he has handed a file by Nadia. "Cell phone report?"

             "Already?"

             Nadia shrugged like it wasn't a big deal. "Yeah. I flirted with the girl at U.S Cellular,"

             "Over the phone?"

            "Yeah,"

             Antonio looked over at the records. "Idiot pinged a local tower. Looks like Marks called his family back in Denver,"

             You walked over to where Dawson was and looked at the records. "He can't be that stupid,"

             Jay shrugged. "If you chose Voight as a victim, you can't be that smart,"

             Al pointed at Ruzek. "Ruzek, triangulate those pings and get us a location. I'll get an arrest warrant. Let's go,"

             The team got the location and like usually it was an rundown building per usual. The team had just finishing sweeping the first floor. "We're going down the stairs,"

             Jay leads the way and you put your hand on his shoulder to let him know you were right behind him. You walked towards door and Jay walked into another one. As you got closer, you could hear Voight's muffled voice. "Jay, this one,"

             Jay turned his direction, started walking towards you and used his walkie to tell the rest of the team that we found him. He looked at you and nodded. You kicked in the door while shouting that you were CPD. Voight looked over at the unit. "Help Olive,"

             You looked over to her and her head had a bag wrapped around her head and Dawson was already helping her. You break Voight free of his restraints. "You okay, Dad?"

             He nodded. "Yeah, they put the bag over her head so they could get the code to the safe and when they got the code they took off,"

             Voight tells you guys what had taken place and the description of the suspects. Halstead calls dispatch and gives out an all-call to give them the description of the suspects but nothing on why he's all an all call.

             You look over at Olive and look at her baby bell. "She's pregnant. She needs to go the hospital,"

             Voight calls over to Olive. "Olive, do you want to go the hospital?"

             She shakes her head. "No, I'm fine,"

             You walked up to her. "You're pregnant and you were almost suffocated. You need to go to the hospital,"

             "I'm okay really,"

              Voight walked up next to you. "She says she fine. Guys can you take her out?"

             Ruzek and Atwater walked her up the stairs to lead her outside.

             "District didn’t send anyone else?"

             You clenched your jaw and answered his question. "We kept in internal. If we're gonna catch these guys, we need to know why they came after you,"

             "Why do people rob people?"

             You pressed your lips together. You hated when your dad answered things like this. "That's so helpful Dad. Now they know we're gunning for them. They're gonna be extra careful. We can have a thousand unit on the street like that,"

             He gave you his famous are you stupid look. "No. We keep this internal.

             You run your hands through your hair and sigh. "You still have IED looking at you. You can't muscle your way through this,"

             Voight looked away from you and ignored you. He turned around and walked up the stairs. This man was going to put you in an early grave but you followed him anyways. You saw that Olive was sitting in the passenger's seat of Ruzek's car, talking to him and Atwater. She looked like she was full of regret when you and Voight walked up to her. "Justin said you had street cash. I was at the bar and I shouldn't have been but I didn't know I was pregnant yet. I guess I ran my mouth,"

             Voight moved forward towards her to talk to her better. "Who'd you tell?"

             "Just my friend Josie. We grew up together but she knew a lot of bad people. I guess she told Ian. I never met Ian before but he came to me last week says I had to get in him your house and if I didn't he'd cut the baby out of me. I believed him,"

         "Alright, you’re gonna see a doctor but first your friend Josie. I’m gonna need everything about her,"

       After getting everything taken care of at the building, you and the team went back to the unit and you all were hard at work trying to find information on any of them. You had finally gotten information and had just printed it out. "Ian Marks has got five known aliases, warrants out for home invasion in Indiana and Michigan,"

            "Two days ago, he used an alias to rent a van downstate.  I put the plate in NVILS so hopefully we'll get something,"

            You walked back to your desk and sat on it. "I called in a search but all we can say is that its confidential matter,"

             Dawson answered you in a duh tone. "That what it is,"

             You rolled your eyes at Dawson and gave a little attitude back. "Yeah, well they can't authorize a search based on that,"

             You could tell Dawson wanted to say something about the attitude that I had thrown at him but he chose not to say anything. "Still no I.D on Ian Mark's partner?"

             Atwater shook his head. "Nah, I talk to some C.I's. Some guys who run with robbery crews but no dice. Still working on it,"

             Dawson looked like he was gonna explode. "What the hell's that mean? If you got nothing, just say you got nothing,"

             You stood up off your desk and walked closer to him. "Dawson, chill the hell out. We are all working the best we can with the information we have gotten. We don't need you to yell at us for answering a question YOU ask,"

             This time Dawson didn't hold back. "I'm a higher rank than you little missy. You don't speak to me like that,"

             You scoffed. "What do you mean, you're a higher rank than me? We have the same rank. We are both Detectives. The only thing you had on me is that you have years on the job than I do. But that doesn't give you a right to dick to everyone,"

             "I might be a dick but at least I'm not screwing my partner,"

             This took you aback for a few seconds. "Excuse me? Wait were you the one who complained to the actual higher ups?"

             Dawson didn't say anything and that was all the answer you needed.

             "Screw you, Dawson,"

             Jay had came in and started to say something but looked up from the paper he had in his hand and noticed that you and Dawson were staring at each other intently. "What's going on here?"

             You tore your eyes of Dawson, grabbed your jacket from your desk. "Nothing,"

             Ruzek hesitantly picked up the phone. "I'll dispatch state police,"

             "No, Voight said to do it ourselves. We'll do a grid search. They got in that area at somewhere. Where's Olinsky?"

             "They went to look for Olive's friend Josie,"

             Dawson glares at you. "Atwater, Ruzek, with me. Get me an I.D on the big guy,"

             "So now you sidelining us?"

             Dawson doesn't say anything and leaves with Ruzek and Atwater. Jay looked between you and Dawson, confused. "What just happened?"

             You threw your jacket on your desk and let out a groan. "Dawson is the one that complained about us to the higher ups,"

             "You're kidding me?"

             "Nope,"

             "Why? How'd you figure it?"

             "I don't know and he snapped on Kevin for answering a question he asked and I basically told him to chill out and stop being a dick. Then he says that he 'might be a dick but at least I'm not screwing my partner'. He didn't say out right that he complained to them but when I asked he didn't say anything,"

             "It would be Dawson who complained,"

             You ignored Jay and sat down at your desk to search if you can find I.Ds on these guys.

             It has about maybe an hour or two before the team gets back to the unit. They had found the van torched and one of the guys had ran through a patch of tall grass but the team didn't find the right person. They did find the person that torched the van. Said that someone paid him fifty bucks to torch it. Your jaw clenched at the sight of Dawson walking up into the room and it stayed that way. Voight had walked in at that point with Al. "Find the friend?"

             "We got both names of these jack offs,"

             Jay who also was pissed glanced over at Al and Voight. "Great, lets' run the big guy's name,"

             Voight walked into his office but keep the door opened. You looked at Dawson and then walked into Voight's office and shut the door. "She's at the hospital? Olive?"

             "Mmm"

             "You need me to deal with Justin? Delay him? Walk him through what is going?"

             Voight simply nodded.

             "You don't want my advice, so I'm just gonna tell you what you I think you'd tell me. Don’t blow this. Lean on your team,"

             You were turning to leave when Voight stopped you. "What is this I hear about a commotion with Dawson? Y/N, I told you if your relationship with Jay starts causing problems-"

             You turned back around and pinched your lips together to figure out how to reply back to not only your dad but also your boss but in the end, you didn't care if your dad fired you, he fired you. "With all due respect, you can shut the hell up right now. No one has an issue with it besides Dawson. We have had no complaints on us. Our relationship has NEVER interfered with the cases we work for the billionth time. We know how to push our relationship and personal feelings back when we are on the clock, maybe talk to the one who can't. I rather quit the Intelligence unit then let some man tell me what I can and can not do when I'm off the clock,"

             You turned around, opened the door, walked to your desk, grabbed your jackets and then walked over to where Antonio was standing. "Keep your nose out of places where it doesn't belong, before someone breaks it,"

             ---

             You were sitting on Jay's desk going over the case details and so were Atwater and Ruzek but they were at their own desk. You could hear footsteps climbing up the stairs and it was Antonio with Voight and Al. You were just waiting for the call all night to say that you were fired and being directed to another unit but it never came. Jay stood up from his chair and looked at all three of them. You could tell Jay wanted to punch Antonio as much if not more than you did but he obviously he kept his composure. "No priors on Lukasz Gergorie. We can't even prove this guy had a sandwich in Philly. Let alone a double murder,"

             Ruzek added on to what Jay said. "We found nothing on the van. It was torched to the rims. No prints, nada,"

             Voight either didn't notice the tension in the room or he just didn't care. "Look, this maniac is on someone's list. Somewhere he jumped the turnstiles. Run a red light. Someone bailed him out. I want every phone, every camera on everyone he knows. I want leads. One hour,"

             Atwater sits up in his chair. "I guess I'm gonna recheck the pods on Voight block,"

             Ruzek chuckled at whatever he thought. "All right. I find a prayer also helps,"

             Nadia had walked up to you after Voight walked into his office. "Sergeant Voight wanted me to pick up Justin from the airport. What do you want me to tell him?"

             "Nothing, absolutely nothing,"

             Platt walked up the stairs as Nadia was walking down them. "Guy here, wants to see Voight.

             "Now's not a good time,"

             "Says his name is Ian Marks,"

             Your eyes go big for a second before going and getting Voight. It was like an hour till you saw Voight again and he put Marks in one of the interview room.

             You and Jay are the one the that interview him. "Where is Gergorie?"

             "I don’t know where he is. The deal was after the house, we split up, and half the money,"

             "Your contact arranged for a way out,"

             "Josie? No. Uh, Gregorie's people. We meet up at 3 at Northerly Island. Some guy I never met is gonna take up to Ontario,"

             Jay wasn't believing this guy's story. "You better not be playing us because if you are,"

             "Yeah, yeah. You work for a psycho. Guess what? We all do,"

             You silently chuckled at that. After you guys got done with interviewing Marks. You guys started to get everything ready for the confrontation.

             You and Jay's cover was to stand in line for a boat rental. Ian was inside and so is everyone else. You didn't know anything about what was happening but for the team saw Gergorie and Marks interacting. You, then, heard screaming from inside the building and a gunshot. You started to look around and saw Gergorie ran out of the building with the team chasing after him. Voight had walked up to him. "Gergoire!"

             Gregorie feeling cornered grabs a women and held her as a hostage with a gun to her head and drops the duffel bag. He didn’t realize Jay and you were walking up behind him slowly.

             "Don’t move. I will waste this bitch,"

             "No one else has to die here,"

             "That's up to you, lose the guns.  Lose the guns right now!"

             Voight sees how close you and Jay are to Gergorie and how you guys had your guns out so he drops his gun. Jay quietly put the gun against his head. Move and I'll shoot. Nice and easy, drop the gun. Release the girl,"

             You move slightly to Gergorie's left side. "Its over. Let her go,"

             He hasn't listening and Jay wasn't having it. "DO IT!"

             He reluctantly listened and lets go of her the girl. You grabbed her hand and pulled her behind you while still having a gun pointed at him but he didn't drop the gun. "Drop it! Drop it!"

             When he finally drops the gun, Jay stomped on his ankle and it made him collapse. Jay quickly put his gun back in his holster and puts him in cuffs. "Put your hands on your head,"

             Voight holsters his gun and walked up to the bag and ripped it open. "Where is it?"

             The guy didn’t answer Voight. So Voight walked over to him and pushed him to where he was laying on his stomach and whatever Voight was looking for, it was in his back pocket. "Get him up! GET HIM UP!"

             He once again was being reluctant but Jay forced him up. "Get up,"

             As soon as Jay got him up Voight grabbed him. "I got him,"

             Voight started walking away and you knew where he was going. You quickly caught up to him. "Think about what you're doing. You have eyes on you. Not just here,"

           All Voight did was look at you and then kept walking. You sighed, hoping your dad was gonna do the right thing.

             ---

             You were just getting ready to leave the precinct when Antonio walked up to your desk. "Y/N, can we talk?"

             You grabbed your jacket and then looked at him. "Instead of coming and talking to me about my relationship, you went to the higher ups and for what? So they could try to break Jay and I up? To get one of us transferred? It wouldn't have worked either way because I would quit faster than they thought of that because I'm not gonna have some old ass dudes who probably have had an affair WITH their partner tell me what I can and not do when I'm not on the clock. With that being said, I don't want someone in my life that would be willing to take away something that makes me happy, so from now on, the only thing we are to each other is co-workers and that's it,"

             Jay walked out of the break room with his jacket in hand. "You ready to go?"

 

             "Yep,"

             ---

             You could hear the faint noise coming from the tv as you walked up to Voight's door hand in hand with Jay. You were suppose to be here earlier but you and Jay treated yourselves to dinner after the past couple of days you had. You didn't brother knocking cause they knew you were coming. You opened the door and saw Justin walking down the stairs. "Justin!"

             Justin walked over to you and engulfed you in a bear hug that lasted a little too long. "Justin, you're crushing me,"

             Justin chuckled and let you go. You took a look at him and he looked good. "Justin, you look good,"

             Justin smiled at you. "You do too. You look happy,"

         Justin took his eyes off you and landed them on Jay. "And I have you to think for that. Look, Jay-"

             Jay cuts him off with a wave of his hand. "Its all good, man. We can start off fresh start,"

[siriuslyblackblog]

Professor 》Remus Lupin (18+)

《 (3) 》

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❈────────•✦•❅•✦•────────❈

Remus Lupin had just finished eating the third chocolate that day. It was evening already and he had ruined his supper. He wasn't feeling hungry, so he stayed in the classroom and waited for the student to arrive. Nancy's words had left him speechless. No girl had ever told him things like that. Remus thought it was funny at first, but when he caught himself thinking about those words, he quickly shook his head and stood up. He found an occupation, but his mind didn't cooperate. It's been so long since the last time he just looked at a girl in a different way. The fire in his heart he had for Nymphadora Tonks was slowly dying out. He did miss her, but if she came back this moment, he wasn't sure if he would want a relationship with her. It just wasn't the same.

He heard shuffling, then doors being opened. The redhead entered the classroom, dressed more inappropriate than in morning classes. He wasn't even sure that was possible. Merlin, he wasn't sure how Filch didn't notice. Not only him, but anyone.

"Good evening, professor," she greeted.

Her professor sighed, then placed another stack of books on one of the front desks. Remus already knew that she was going to be a tough one and he was already tired. Perhaps he should keep eating chocolate until he gets chubby so no girl approaches him? As much as he missed someone, he had to be focused on being a good professor this year. The rest will easily come. Although, he wasn't stupid. He knew what he looked like and he noticed all the attention he got from female students. Many seventh years purposely started getting in trouble just to get detention with me. Unfortunate for them, all of them mostly suffered detention from their House Heads.

"These books need to be checked and sorted alphabetically, Miss Pennington."

"Of course, professor."

Nancy pulled out her wand and got ready to cast a spell. Just as she opened her mouth, the stern voice of her professor interrupted her.

"No magic, " he said.

The redhead frowned first, then calmly put her wand back in her pocket. She adjusted the skirt so that a bit of her thighs were visible. The cold air hit her skin and made her shiver a bit, but she collected herself and put on the best smile she could.

"As you wish, professor."

Remus left the girl to do her task and went back to his place. While grading the tasks he had given the sixth years, he noticed one was missing. He counted the papers again, but couldn't get the number he needed. Then, he remembered. The girl which left the class almost in tears. The man furrowed his eyebrows, remembering her red face. He hated when people were sad. He knew how awful it is to hold back tears in a room full of people and he didn't want anyone to feel like that. He let her leave the class so she could let it all out in peace. Still, he wondered what caused that reaction.

"Miss Pennington?" He called out, abandoning the papers on his desk.

The girl turned around, waiting for the next words. Remus stopped for a moment, thinking if it was a right thing to ask about a student. Asking about someone's wellbeing isn't wrong, right?

"The girl from this morning. Miss-?"

"Periculum. Roseanne Periculum."

"Right, Miss Periculum. Is she feeling better?"

Nancy shrugged, then went back to arranging the books. Remus frowned, dissatisfied with the answer. This girl was supposed to be a good friend of Miss Periculum, yet all she had was shrugging? It must be terrible not having anyone to ask about your problems. He was lucky to have amazing friends with him during his bad times. He missed them.

"Do you happen to know the reason behind her behaviour today?"

Nancy rolled her eyes, annoyed with the attention professor Lupin was giving to a person that wasn't even in the room. She felt a bit guilty for not asking Rose about her problem, but at the end of the day, she didn't ask anyone. Rose shouldn't be feeling left out. Whatever it was, she'll get through it. Everything comes and goes, nothing stays.

"No, professor."

༻❁༺

The week passed by rather quickly and Rose was soon getting Coco off of her so she could get ready. Nancy was still asleep. She had decided last night that she wasn't in the mood for classes, so she'll pretend to be sick. Dell was already dressed and sat patiently on her bed, waiting for Rose. Rose didn't really despise Dell like she did everyone else. The blonde haired girl was funny and interesting to be around. Maybe it was because of her relationship with Fred Weasley, but who knows. Maybe Rose finally liked someone who wasn't a Weasley. Speaking of Weasleys, they bombarded her with questions the next day she showed up at Transfiguration. Rose didn't want to explain that her insecurity kicked in, so she said the one thing girls always complained about: period. The boys quickly shut up, not asking her any more questions.

Next to Dell laid the fourth roommate. Priya Patil was the older sister of Padma and Parvati Patil. It was interesting how the initials of all three were P. P. Just like Dell, Rose also didn't mind Priya. She minded her best friend, Elisaveta Yakusheva. Her father played a big role in almost everything, just like Mr Malfoy. Elisaveta - or Lisa, like Priya and her close friends call her - is almost as popular as Nancy. Of course, Nancy's red curls and green eyes won over Lisa's blonde straight hair and blue eyes. Nancy was also a million times nicer, as unbelievable as it sounds. Priya was stuck between the two girls. She loved both of her best friends, but most of the time she faced the problem of choosing sides. In those moments, Rose was happy to have less than five friends.

This morning, Dell noticed that the brown haired girl had gotten up earlier and was spending a big amount of time in front of the mirror. She also noticed a chocolate peeking from her bag. Little did she know that it was a creation of the Weasleys. Rose was supposed to hand the chocolate to the new professor today. She wasn't sure what it was supposed to do. Fred didn't want to tell her and George only laughed whenever she asked.

"Rosie, I feel like I'm watching Nancy. What's going on with you?"

"What do you mean?"

"You don't wear your skirt that way. And you've been trying to fix your hair for hours now. Is there something I don't know?"

It was true. The skirt was placed higher on her waist, revealing her knees and a bit of thighs. She had seen professor Lupin only during meals, but he was so far away to see her. Today she will finally see him again. She couldn't wait to hear his voice and look at him properly this time. Tired of her shuffling, Dell stood up to help her roommate. She cast a spell to fix the mess on her head. Soft brown waves replaced split ends and tangled strands. It has been so long since her hair looked like that. The last time she put effort in her looks was when she was in love with Oliver Wood.

Rose split up with her roommate and entered the classroom alone. The twins were in their seats, both of them sending a mischievous smile her way. She wished she knew what the chocolate actually was.

"Why a chocolate? What if he thinks I'm trying to flirt with him?"

George laughed at her words, then took the chocolate from her. He admired it as if he wasn't the one who made it. "Our professor has a sweet tooth, love. He won't be thinking about you when he sees it."

Needless to say, the girl was disappointed. That's honestly what she wanted. Him to see her, to think about her. One thought led to another and she found herself thinking about what happened that Monday in detention. Nancy came back looking like a mess, her lipstick a bit smeared on her bottom lip. She was jealous. So jealous that she could feel her head burning. Her thoughts were interrupted when George touched her leg with his under the desk. The professor entered the classroom with a good morning, then sat down. Rose crossed her legs, feeling a bit of fear because of the way she wore her uniform. Maybe she could let her tongue loose too and earn herself a detention with him. Just maybe...

After giving everyone a task, Remus remembered the girl and allowed himself to glance at her. She had her head down, her hair slowly getting puffy again. She seemed fine today and it made him feel better. He didn't like to see his students come to class in pain or anything like that. The girl then raised her head, looking directly into his eyes. Her eyes widened, surprised that the professor was already looking at her. Her head was soon in the previous position, her face now hidden with hair. Just as Remus wanted to go back to the lesson, he noticed something. He noticed how Rose was uncomfortably shifting under the desk. Then, he noticed her bare thighs. She had her legs crossed, her hands fixing the skirt every few moments. The redhead next to her shot her a few confused looks. She didn't look like that last Monday. She looked like a mess back then. Remus also couldn't help but notice that one white lock of hair and her plump bottom lip. She was a refreshing sight. Of course, all girls in Hogwarts were stunning, but they all looked the same. Roseanne didn't have long skinny legs and long nails. She also didn't have lots of makeup on her face. Remus wasn't sure when was makeup even allowed. He remembered how his friend once got in trouble for putting on lip gloss. A bright red lipstick? Merlin, what else will he see in this school?

Rose felt her cheeks burning as she felt professor Lupin's eyes on her. Finally, she thought. But she also felt disappointed. Did she really have to dress up that way to get noticed? What kind of a man is he? Rose also wondered if she really wanted to get close to a man like that. A man who only noticed her after she changed her appearance and copied the style of other girls. They always tell you to be yourself and be unique, but then you get excluded for being too different. It's hard to live, really.

The first class came to an end and everyone was too busy gathering their belongings to hear professor's words. Rose managed to write down the task he gave them for the next class, then gathered her own things. George playfully pulled her sleeve, then nodded towards the chocolate in her bag.

"Do I have to?"

"What are you scared of, Rosie?"

"I just don't want to get in trouble."

But she did want to get in trouble. A trouble called professor Remus Lupin. She glanced at the chocolate, then her professor. He was busy taking off his jacket and collecting his books.

"Since when?" George asked, surprised with the sudden change in his crush's behaviour.

Rose bit her bottom lip, thinking about the situation. The classroom was almost empty, a few students still pushing each other to get out. George pinched her cheek, then kissed her head. She despised contact of any kind, but head kisses and cheek pinching from the twins were different. She would occasionally hit their shoulder, acting like she hated it. The redhead was the last to exit the classroom, leaving Rose alone with the professor. He had gotten up and was arranging the books on the shelf. His jacket was placed on his chair and he only wore the white shirt. Rose couldn't help but notice his back muscles through his shirt. The sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, revealing the veins on his arms. The brown haired girl stood behind him with the chocolate in her hands, lost in the way his fingers went through the pages and the way his back muscles moved. She didn't even notice her jaw slowly dropping as the man set the books back in place and stretched. Rose wasn't sure he was aware that she's still there.

Remus turned around, running his fingers through his hair and letting out a sigh. He finally had some free time. Enough to eat one chocolate bar. Maybe two. The man stopped in his tracks when he noticed a girl standing in front of him. Her mouth was slightly opened, her cheeks pink and her chest slowly rising and falling. He wasn't stupid. He was aware of his looks. He just didn't think it was worth that much attention. There were men who looked far better than him. Then why did all the girls still go after him?

"Miss Periculum," he greeted, putting his hands behind his back.

The girl closed her mouth and gulped, then looked down. The chocolate seemed like a normal one you could buy at Hogsmeade, but Merlin knew what it actually was. She noticed professor Lupin eyeing the chocolate, making her more nervous than she already was.

"Oh, before you say anything..."

The man walked over to his desk, picking up a few papers and looking at them. Rose watched as his fingers moved, her eyes following the veins all the way up his arms. She could feel her cheeks heating up again, her mind creating pictures she would've loved to see happen in reality.

"...because you left the classroom last Monday, you missed a task I need to grade. I hope you understand that you can't be the only one without a grade."

The brown haired girl nodded, mimicking the previous action of her professor by putting her hands behind her back. "When will I do it, professor?"

Remus mentally slapped himself. The way his student called him professor made his mind go crazy. She had a quiet, silky voice and he just wished to hear it one more time. So he asked, "Sorry?"

"When will I do the task, professor?"

Rose repeated the sentence a bit louder and Remus had to use all his strength so he wouldn't smile with satisfaction. He needed to see her again as soon as possible and as often as possible. Her voice was addicting. He would do anything to hear her call him again. Remus also wondered what his real name would sound on her lips. He dared to wonder what it sounded like in more than just a normal way. The man turned around towards his desk, going through the papers to hide his heavy breathing. He did feel disappointed in himself. How dare he think about a student that way? But he still couldn't help himself and say:

"Tonight, Miss Periculum."

[shortyisweird9]

'Lonely ghost serie'

An interesting night- part II

Tw⚠️: swearing

Corpse stretched as he set up his work station, Pewds was starting another live stream and invited him on and since sleep won't show up anytime soon, he hopped on without much thinking.

He smiled when his friends started to greet each other and him.

"Guys, you saw the video I send you ,right?" Lily asked.

"Yeah but I couldn't get in touch with ghost ,her friend was kind to let me know she might not feel comfortable doing a livestream with complete strangers. "Jack said as the others puffed in disappointment.

"That sucks. I wanted to see if she could have kill us all." Grease spoke as he opens a can of soda.

"You wanted to be killed by her?!"

They laughed as Grease quickly defended himself.

"Hey-Hey, to be killed by someone with that skill is a privilege."

"Simp." Jason concluded.

Their laughter ran wilde as Grease again began to shout.

"Hey,Lily?"

"Yes, Rae?"

"You been quiet. Something's wrong?"

"Whenever you are ready." She simply said, confusing them.

"W-What? Lily are you okay-"

"Hello,gents!"

It was her.

"GHOST?"

"Oh my god..."

"HOW but Jack said-"

"Guys ,guys ,please don't overwhelm." Lily again said, calming the both parties.

"Right ,sorry. Anyway, top of morning to yah ,ghost."

He could hear her swallowing her nerves before she cleared her voice, tingles ran down his back when the Reaper like tune hit his headphones.

"Hello!...This is awkward. Sorry."

They giggled with her as she moved in her chair.

"Ghost? "

"Yeah?"

"Your friend said you will not feel comfortable enough to join us today."

"Well, it's raining so that puts me at ease and your friend, Lily, was very convincing on bring me here."

"*giggle* I just showed you picture of my friends' pets."

"...As I said before, very convincing."

They always laughed especially when the stranger proved to be funny enough to bring that chuckle out of them.

"So ready to rock?"

"Let's roll."

————————————————————

The match was entertaining with couple of close calls, too close for your liking. Corpse was on you the entire time so to pay him for his diligence, you killed him first as he struggled to swipe that damn key card.

Then Jason, then Jack, Rae proved to be a bit harder to kill but you got her in O2, Lily was easy, Sykkuno was all confuse as he watched the crewmates die with him doing nothing, Pewds and Mark were a game of venting and killing swiftly. Speed was the key of your success of killing them all.

You could see they have their microphones on but no one said a thing.

The mischievous smirk that was plastered on your face grew when sounds of confusion came from Jack. Always the loud ones reveal the most.

"Whaaaat?"

"What the fuck?"

"I literally didn't have time to even kill any of you. Ghost came in like: slash ,slash, kill,kill."

You finally cracked at the ridiculous sounds Sykkuno made, a poor imitation of the sabers from Star wars.

"Hahaha"

He heard your laugh, he like the sound of it , the easiness and the innocence it held even though you killed all of them without mercy. What he didn't know if he liked was the stirring in his stomach cause by it. The tightness in his breath, the long smile and the bouncing of his legs as a result of hearing it.

He just shook his curls before paying attention to the group again, you were being put in the spotlight, something he cringed at as he recalled the painful experiences he had while being put under light.

"So, ghost?"

"Yes ,Jason?"

A whine came from the man known now as a simp for deep voices. You giggled, shaking your head and screaming when the black pair of headphones fell down your lap. Luckily you had the mic muted. That will be embarrassing...

You fixed your long hair, putting it behind your ears careful to not tug on your fresh piercings , your headphones back on the top ,you dived right back.

"Can you tell us about yourself?"

"Hmm..what do you want to know?"

You heard him sucking in a breath and to be honest you couldn't blame him, the voice was hot.

"Um ...anything. "

You giggled half embarrassed, half amusement by the pitch his voice turned to ,excited to hear whatever you may answer.

"Oh,okay. Um...My piercings hurt. My right leg is bouncing like crazy and um...I crave jelly candy."

"Piercings?"

"Yeah, my pal just did on my right three helix piercings: forward, mid and low. Plus the industrial on my left ear iches a bit."

"Oh, I am sorry."

"Nothing to be sorry about, Jas. Thanks for asking by the way."

"Oh, don't worry. Do you have any others?"

"Um..yeah. On the right ear ,I have..um. helix , flat, rook and upper. Left ahh..industrial,helix and orbital."

"Wow, th-that's a lot."

"Hah, I just told you about my ears."

A choke cane from him ,probably he was drinking something. It had ice though, you could hear the ice hitting the metal of the glass.

The man started to choke and cough ,making you and the others who listened patiently on your convo worried.

"Easy there ,mate."

"Jay, you good?"

"Easy there ,buddy."

"I-I'm *cough* I am fine. You have MORE?!"

"Yeah ,three on the upper part of my right eyebrow and a ring on the left one."

"Jesus. " He said, calming himself at last.

"Yeah,*giggle*. I also plan to slit my tongue in two."

"Oh, yeah cool.WHAT?!"

————————————————————

The next game you were imposter again but this time Corpse was your sidekick. Or were you his?

Anyway, you decided to let him do more of the killing,believe it or not , you weren't the blood thirsty monster the chat thought of you, all in a joking manner of course. Sabotage and let Corpse do his Kiss of death. Seeing couple of his streams ,you hoped he wasn't too nervous.

"Alright guys, ghost is imposter with us so this time I have to be more careful. They will probably suspect her to be imposter again . Sorry I can't see your message, I need to concentrate on this."

Proving his theory , ghost just sabotaged as she did fake tasks, being a guardian of Lily as he killed so far Mark and Toast.

"W-Where was the body?" His voice came of a bit more nervous then usual.

"In the nav." Dave answered.

"You good ,Corpse?"

He heard you ask ,you were more observant than the others who either lost themselves in the safety feeling of the match or the euphoria of the game, you always pointed suspicious behaviours of the others when they accused him of being imposter. He liked that, gave him time to calm his raging heart.

"Y-Yeah..*cough* I mean yeah, I am good. H-How about you?"

Fuck...

He didn't even want to catch a glimpse of the chat ,having a hunch of what they may be inferring.

"You seem shaky, Corpse. Something happened?"

He didn't needed to see Sean's face to know it will matched a lenny one. Finding an excuse so he is spared of the teasing and/or the allegations he is imposter, is a must.

"Yeah, I am just...ah...freezing. It's cold here. Brr. Brr."

They laughed at his poor attempt to sound like a freezing popsicle, your laugh put him more at ease. He knew however that his attempt of shifting the suspension failed, too bad he wanted to play more with you. I guess the roles are switching.

"He sound sus ,guys. Should we vote him out?"

"Wow, Lily. Thanks."

The girl giggling only stopped when you started speaking.

"He's not sus, guys. He's just a dork ,a stick with crippling anxiety and honestly same."

God, he wished he could fist bump you right now.

"More like a branch but who we voting then?" Sean asked.

" SPEEDRUN!"

Felix sealed his faith however. Your work only left him flustered and with a derpy smile , his honour lost in the vacuum space.

...............CORPSE was ejected.............

"Well shit. Anyway ,guys. Let me see what you been talking about? And I better not see any 'SIMP' comments. "

————————————————————

"How?! How the fuck?! You tricked me!" Lily screamed at you for your betrayal.

"Wow, so now I have big trust issues with ghost." Grease announced.

"Deep mommy, no." Jason said ,bringing a laugh out of you for the thousand of time.

You started to like this guy, he and Corpse will be spared next time you are imposter.

"Sorry ,guys-"

"Who told you,you are allowed to do that?" Pewds shouted at you in a heated but not menacing tone.

"You didn't let me finish."

You took a sip out of your ice tea.

"RIP to ya'll but I am different. Not my fault the only guy I take advices from is Doomguy. And as the legend would say: Rip and tear."

"OH MY FUCK-"

You lowered your mic as they screamed in disbelief ,Corpse didn't said anything however. You were curious as to why?

"Corpse?"

"Yeah ,baby?"

Woah. That caught you out of guard. Like the warmth in your olive cheeks and the deliciously painful and frightening feeling of twisting in your stomach.

"Um..."

You blinked, no words head's empty.

"Oh, shit. Sorry, ghost. I didn't meant to make you feel weird."

"No,no. I am good. Ey, Jas?"

"Yes ,hun?"

"Do you take applications for your Corpse fan club?"

Jesus, what is this night even?

————————————————————

Hey, guys!💖

Hope you enjoyed the second part of the serie.

Anyway have a nice day/night!🌙🌌

Tagged 💖💖: @moolujk

[911paralleluniverse]

I'm way too late to the party. But as they say, it's better late than never.

How did you discover 9-1-1?

Pornhub YouTube. You know when people smoke or do some weird awkward stuff routine after sex for buff, I just browse YouTube to prevent myself from throwing up from my fake moans prior. I have no idea why a 9-1-1 video was recommended to me but when I saw Peter Krause's face in the thumbnail, and I was like fuck it, round 2. I clicked the video and it was a scene with Buck and an angry Bobby chopping an onion. I was like wow, they can sandwich me anytime. It was a short but good scene, with great acting and dialogue. I have to watch another short video and I got curious so I have to look for its pilot episode and the rest is exhausting history.

So what is your favorite episode?

Pilot episode. If it weren't for a great pilot, I wouldn't be able to continue the next episode.

Who is your favorite Begins ep?

First I must say, all these Begins episodes are dope. They all made me cry AF.

Hen begins was amazing. Aisha Hinds acted the hell out of her hair. Seeing Hen with a dress and a wig was the funniest thing. Her coming out scene in the ambulance telling everyone that they suck to see her as her. Idk about you guys but I got chills.

Chimney begins was I think one of the best for me. Kenneth Choi delivered. He can make us laugh with his one liners all throughout the series or make us cry with his pain. I think I've seen the episode twice. That's how good it is. I'm still curious how he got his nickname though.

Bobby begins again was a confusing episode title for a newbie fan like me. Sorry for my ignorance but I had to look for the Bobby begins 1 until I had my wtf moment. I realized season 1 was technically Bobby (and Buck) begins. Bobby's backstory was heartbreaking. I couldn't imagine my asshole of a boyfriend surviving similar to what Bobby went through.

Athena Begins. Everytime I think about this episode, I think about the song Rise up and the perfect sequence of Young and present Athena. That was UH-MEY-ZZZEEENG! Athena breaking down and how Bobby caught her was so dramatically beautiful. Those scenes only happens on TV. Because in reality, I don't think my man will catch me if I break down because I lost his condoms.

Eddie begins. This was emotional for me because I'm a softie with kids and a kid being trapped 40ft below like how the hell the kid managed to survive that long is beyond me. I cried a few times in this episode. With Eddie battling with his marriage, with his parents and how he wanted to catch up to his son for those lost times. I cried for the kid, for Chris and for Eddie by saving himself from drowning.

Buck Begins. This was epic. I think this is my second favorite Begins. No child deserves to be neglected the way Buck was by his parents. Buck isn't a savior baby. It feels like Buck was born to suffer from emotional and physical pain all his life. Poor Evan hurting himself just to get attention. He did get it the attention but never love. Thanks to Maddie she was always there for him. This begins and 4x04 had me bawling like crazy. Outstanding acting from Oliver and the actress who plays his mom. She pissed the hell out of my pubes, really.

Who is your favorite character?

Bobby. He's the 118's and Michael and Athena's and the kids' emotional stability.

What are you expecting in Season 5?

More steamy love scenes from the couples and more shirtless scenes from Buck, Eddie and Bobby action and less drama. I think we've had enough drama from their begins. The writers should focus more on the dispatchers, firefighters, LAPD team up in one call just like in the pilot where Abby, Buck and Athena teamed up to save the little girl from being kidnapped or whatever else. That was one of the series' best rescues to date. Sadly, that was 4 seasons ago. I hope they do some more action packed stuff.

Who is your favorite couple?

Maddie and Chimney or Madney. Their romantic development was better than Bobby and Athena's sudden date in 1x10. I like their balance as characters.

Maddie was -apart from being neglected by her parents - a victim of abuse, who were teary eyed most of her screen time. Not that I'm complaining but JLH's acting choices are sometimes cringey.

Chimney though he has his own abandonment issues with his father and losing his mom and Kevin, he still finds time to make everyone around him laugh and annoy at the same time especially to his pseudo young brother, Buck.

Are Buck and Eddie gay? Do you think they're going to be a couple?

Sexuality is fluid. Sexual preference is evolving. One day you wake up you want to be fucked by a hot hairy and muscly straight guy and then one day you wake up you want to fuck a butch lesbian. And to be honest I don't know if Buddie is going to be a Canon. Their characters are so connected together as if they're soulmates, so carefully written and so familial/domestic that we didn't see with Athena and Hen, Chimney and Hen, Bobby and Chimney, Bobby and Hen's friendship. I wouldn't mind f they will keep them as just two platonic friends who happens to eye fuck each other platonically every chance they got and raise a kid together for 3 years now.

Last question, is Ravi cute?

Oh fuck me, YES! YES!

[turinn]

Naive

Ray Blackwell x M!Reader

Summary: An invitation at a party reveals that Luka had no idea you’re gay, and brings up a concern you hadn’t had before. Tags: Crack, fluff, secret relationship, mention of homophobia, alcohol consumption A/N: This is based on a dream I had where Luka and I had this exact conversation and when I woke up and remembered it I nearly threw up laughing. I did actual research for the girls outfit and hair bc im a fashion history nerd. the pocket watch i just thought was cute. Fenrir calls the reader fruity but its okay bc hes gay too god bless Word Count: 1.5k

The party was the usual affair expected of the Godspeed's, an air of elegance- present but not too overbearing- hanging over the large hall. Music drifted gently to your ears as you took everything in, a small smile settling on your face.

You couldn't help but feel a little underdressed. The officers had, of course, kept their uniforms on, but everyone else present was dressed to the nines. You'd thought the suit you wore was lovely when you and Seth had seen it last week, dark blue with a white trim, paired with a pale cyan tie and pocket square. The gold watch that settled comfortably in your pocket had been a gift from Blanc, supposedly made by Oliver to look similar to his own, to commemorate your decision to stay in Cradle. Compared to everyone else, it felt rather simple now, but you pushed the thought aside. Nobody was judging what you were wearing, they were here to enjoy themselves same as you.

"Would you like a drink?" Ray asked, voice soft enough not to startle you too much. This wasn't too effective, as you'd gotten lost in your thoughts, and sort of forgotten there were people around you, but it was kind of him to try. "Oh, yes, please." You smiled at him and a moment later he'd walked off, talking to Sirius about something, leaving you alone with Luka. Fenrir had disappeared to greet his family when you'd first arrived, and Seth was who knows where, but you didn't mind it being just the two of you. Luka rarely came to these, in fact this was the first he'd been to since you'd arrived in Cradle, despite it being your fifth, and you decided someone should stick with him so he didn't feel quite as nervous.

As you turned to say something to him, you noticed a lady making her way over to the both of you, looking rather flustered. Her fists were clenched at her sides, and she seemed to be muttering something to herself, but it was clear she had intent to speak to one of you. Perhaps she wanted to talk to Luka? He was cute, it wouldn't surprise you. What did surprise you, however, was when she walked up to you instead.

"Um, excuse me if this is far too forward, but... would you be interested in dancing with me?" She sounded so nervous, and you almost wanted to say yes. Any other man would have been lucky to get such an invitation- she looked stunning. She wore her hair in curls, gathered at the back of her neck, with a hairpiece of pale blue flowers was pinned at the front, a necklace donning the same type of flower hanging just above the neckline of her gown. The gown in question matched the colour of the flowers well, though the width of the crinoline supported skirt would have made you concerned about the logistics of dancing with her- if you'd had any intention of saying yes. Her cheeks were tinted pink as she chewed her bottom lip and waited for your answer, avoiding your gaze. A hand on your chest and a sincerely apologetic look on your face, you began to respond. "Oh dear. I'm terribly sorry, but you seem to have gotten the wrong end of the stick. You're a very attractive young lady but I'm afraid... how should I put this," You glanced at Luka for help, but he seemed to have no idea what you were trying to tell her, "I'm afraid I don't tend to set my eye on the ladies, so to speak." "You're... gay?" A sympathetic nod. "That's the ticket. Sorry, love." "Oh, it's not a problem! I'm really sorry to have bothered you!" She suddenly looked much less nervous, though a little embarrassed, and scurried off. You sighed. "I feel a little bad. I really hope she finds someone to dance with." Luka looked at you quizzically. "Why did you lie to her?" A confused laugh escaped you. "I'm sorry?" "You told her you were into guys. Why lie?" As he said this, Seth and Fenrir came up behind him, and hearing his question their eyebrows shot up. So did yours. Was he kidding? "Luka, sweetie, you have got to tell me what part of my personality made you think I was heterosexual, so I can set about changing it immediately." Seth choked on his drink, and though you flashed him a grin, you weren't entirely kidding. Going from Victorian London to a world where being gay was perfectly acceptable had been quite the change, but you'd been certain all of your friends had known. It's not like you were quiet about it, and sure, Luka was naive but... come on, now. "Wait are you... you were being honest?" "Yes?" "Luka," Fenrir began, stepping next to you and resting an elbow on your shoulder, "How have you seriously not noticed that he's gay yet?" "Well- there was no reason for me to assume!" "You watched me drunk make out with at least 2 different Black Army soldiers in my first month here!" Luka looked flustered, and utterly dumbfounded. The expression was one he wore often, usually when people insinuated that someone was in love- but somehow about five times more confused. He was unfortunate enough that Ray and Sirius returned at this moment, just in time to hear both your last remark, and his next one.

"I thought that was just something you did when you were drunk?" In another moment you were on your knees, legs shaking so much from laughter that you couldn't hold yourself up any longer. Fenrir was right there beside you, practically convulsing. Everyone else was laughing too- except poor Luka. You felt a little bad, truly you did, but this had to be the funniest thing you had ever heard. "He's completely straight, but watch out! Get a couple drinks in him and he turns fruity!" Fenrir managed to get out between cackles, and Ray was glad to have put your drinks down when Luka had last spoken, because he too nearly fell to the ground at this.

"Luka- Luka I'm sorry." You pulled yourself to your feet, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. "We aren't laughing at you." Another fit of giggles overcame you. "Okay we kind of are, but it's not malicious or anything. That was just... hands down the funniest thing you've ever said." It took most of you 5 or so minutes to fully calm down from what he'd said, and anything that jogged your memories of it would bring you back to a state of uncontrollable laughter for the rest of the night. Luka came round to it being pretty funny after you talked him through the dozens of times you'd mentioned your sexuality to him since you'd met- every one of which had gone over his head.

Hours after the party had worn down and you'd all made your way home, you lay in bed, your head pressed against a familiar chest, and sighed. "What's up?" "I just... D'you think anyone else just hasn't realised?" Ray cocked his head, confused. "I'm gonna need a little more info than that, kitten." "I suppose I just... Back in London, it's not even legal to be gay, and I don't know if it ever will be. When I first came out to Fen, he told me that it was fine here, accepted and even celebrated. So, I guess I just thought that people wouldn't make the automatic assumption that I'm straight, y'know? I mean I talk about it a lot among you guys but- when I’m out and about... where do people think my final destination is? When I pick up a silly cat themed gift for you does the shopkeep think I’m buying it for my wife? It shouldn't be a big deal, I guess, but I'd never been able to be myself until I came here, and now it's like I can be me but... people will still only see who I am if I tell them. It's just weird is all. I dunno. Maybe I'm drunk." "You're not drunk. It's an understandable concern. I guess I've never thought about it, because whether or not people would accept that part of me has never been an issue, but the fact that you've had to hide it for so long and now that you're able to be open people still aren't seeing it must be hard. If you want we could... come out, so to speak?" Your eyebrows raised, and you moved back, propping yourself up on your arm so you could look your partner in the eyes.

It had been decided at the very start of your relationship, which had officially begun a few months after you'd made the choice to stay in Cradle, that the two of you would keep it under wraps for a while. Being from the Land of Reason was more than enough reason for people to take an unwanted interest in you, and you didn't need the extra attention being the King of Spades' partner would garner. Plus, anyone with a grudge against Ray would see you as a target the second you announced it. It had been a sensible suggestion on his part, one you hadn't hesitated to agree to, and as far as you knew only Sirius and Fenrir knew about your relationship. Fenrir because he had walked in on you sitting in Ray's lap while he worked late one night, and Sirius because- well, can anything get past that guy? And now, Ray was offering to tell the entirety of Cradle you were his, just so that you didn't feel like you were hiding your identity anymore? You could feel your eyes starting to burn, and you cursed the late hour and the alcohol in your system for making you cry so easily, but... "I don't think we need to be that drastic. You were right when you said it would keep me safe for us to not be in the public eye, at least for now. I'm sure Seth can come up with some better way for me to tell the whole world I'm gay." "I don't doubt that at all." Ray grinned, placing a gentle kiss on first your forehead, then your nose, and finally on your lips. "Tomorrow, though. You need your beauty sleep." "Ah, yeah, can't risk getting ugly. My boyfriend might not want me anymore." You quipped. "Exactly." He smirked at you, turning out the light and pulling you into his arms.

[gingerwritess]

Hello, I hope you have a nice evening, morning, afternoon or whenever you read it and in whole just a good day🌸 Secondly I'd like to ask: how would Loki react, if Elliot doesn't think girls are 'bleegh' anymore? Would Loki give Elliot advice on how he courted the reader? I'm sorry if you don't take these requests and I'm sorry if that made you uncomfortable in any way. Stay healthy and happy🌸

thankyouforrequestingthissokindlywtfthatmademesohappy

also i know i didn’t get to the actual “advice” but this was getting really long so that part will be a separate drabble h e h

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

“Hey, dad?”

Loki nods, biting the tip of his tongue as he carefully measures a teaspoon of olive oil. “Hm?”

“You busy right now?”

“A bit,” he murmurs, focusing on not spilling—the tiny little measuring spoons you got years ago are much to small for his fingers.

Elliot quickly nods. “Gotcha. I’ll, um, come back later.”

“No, no, I can multitask, what can I do for you?”

“It’s all good,” Elliot assures him, backing out of the kitchen. “It’s stupid anyways, I’ll just ask mom or look it up or something.”

“Elliot,” Loki laughs, setting down the olive oil and grabbing a wooden spoon, pointing it at his son, then at the fridge. “Talk to me. And get me a stick of butter, I could use the help.”

A little smile lights the kid’s face and he rushes to the fridge, grabbing the butter and tossing it to Loki. “You know I can’t cook,” he reminds him, leaning against the counter as Loki mixes. “So I don’t think I can be of much help, but I’ll try.”

“You didn’t get that from me,” Loki chuckles. “Blame your mother. What did you need?”

“That’s kinda what I wanted to ask you about.”

“Your mother?” Loki glances at the time—good, you’re not supposed to be home for another hour. “Are you wondering how she ended up with someone like me?”

“Not really, I think I get that part,” Elliot replies, rubbing the back of his neck. “Kind of. I don’t know. Um, I just was wondering if you, um…”

“…yes?”

“If-if you could maybe, I don’t know, give me some advice?”

The wooden spoon falls to the counter with a clatter.

Oh, no big deal, Loki’s son just came to him seeking advice, trusting him to lead him in the right direction with his knowledge and guidance, trusting him not to steer him wrong, that’s all.

Easily one of the best moments in Loki’s thousands of years of life.

“O-of course, I’d be happy to help,” he stutters, quickly trying to cover his surprise. “Advice with what?”

A relieved grin breaking over his lips, Elliot shuffles a little closer to his dad at the stove. “There’s, uh, this girl.”

Loki all but chokes, dropping the spoon in his risotto and whirling around to his son.

“There’s a WHAT??”

“A girl,” Elliot laughs sheepishly, picking up the fallen spoon and handing it back to Loki. “C’mon, dad, don’t make this weird.”

“Okay, right, sure.” Loki nods, trying to control his grin. “What advice do you need?”

“Well, I, um, don’t know if she likes me back.”

“You are in love with someone who doesn’t like you?”

“No!” Elliot backtracks, eyes wide. “No, no, no, I didn’t say I’m in love with her, yikes, no—”

“Why do you say that like it’s a bad thing?”

“I can’t be in love, dad, that’s…not possible. I just like her.”

“Not possible,” Loki repeats slowly, going back to his cooking. “You know, your mother tried to kill me when we first met. I didn’t think loving her would be possible either, but here we are.”

“So you’re saying if Morgan tries to kill me, she might love me?” Elliot snorts and shakes his head. “Nah, thanks, dad. I think you and mom were just a little weird. Special case.”

No answer.

Loki’s frozen at the stove, knuckles turning white around the handle of his spoon—he must have misheard the name.

Not Morgan…Stark, right?

“N-no,” he tries to bring himself back, give the best advice he can—giving advice? Yeah, this is a first for Loki. “I only mean to say…love, if you, erm, believe in that sort of thing, it’s—it’s different for everyone, a-and you never know where you might find it—”

“But I know where I found it,” Elliot cuts in, confusion etching itself into his brow as Loki rambles. “I just don’t know what to do with it. What’d you do when you figured out you loved mom?”

Loki swallows thickly. Gods, he wishes you were home for this conversation. The puberty talk was fun enough on his own, but now this?

A little part of him wonders if it’s healthy to be scared to talk to your children, yet here he is, heart pounding and palms starting to sweat as Elliot waits for him to answer.

Elliot repeats the question, a little quieter, gentler this time.

Oh, gods.

“Y-you should ask your mother,” he quietly offers, keeping his gaze trained on his cooking. “She’s better at this, all these, ah…” he breathes a quiet laugh. “Emotions.”

His dish isn’t turning out well, honestly, the rice is a bit burned and the sauce seems to be about to break on him. Wonderful.

It was supposed to be a surprise for you, since you’d been gone most of the day after weeks of little sleep, a surplus of work, and Frigg deciding she “doesn’t need third grade” after all.

For the record, he’s a supporter of the little movement.

“Okay.” Elliot nods, glancing at the mess on the counter. “Do you want some time alone? You don’t look too good, I don’t want to be a bother…”

“No,” Loki snaps and his fist hits the countertop, sending measuring cups flying as he stares at his failed meal.

Elliot flinches and takes a step back.

“Mom’ll be home any minute,” he reminds him, palms up in front of him. “I’m sorry, I’m really, really sorry if I said something, dad, really—”

“Please don’t leave.” Loki’s voice cracks and Elliot gulps.

“Okay.”

A moment passes, Loki hunched over the counter and gripping the edge in a white-knuckled hold, Elliot watching cautiously from the doorway, picking at the palm of one hand.

Laughter breaks the silence, Loki’s, Elliot realises, his dad is laughing now and sounds borderline psychotic.

“What did I do?” Loki turns to him, eyes bloodshot and swimming with unfalling tears. “Yes…what did I do when I realised I loved your mother?”

Elliot just stares, wishing you were here, too.

“You want to know—w-what I did,” Loki laughs behind a wet sniff, “when I realised I loved your mother? I denied it for months, Elliot, and I treated her like a piece of shit.”

A hollow, dull ache fills the boy’s chest and the room goes cold—Loki doesn’t cuss in front of him or Frigg; only on the rarest of occasions when he needs to really, really emphasise a point.

“I acted like I hated her,” he spits out, eyes flashing, “and many times convinced myself that I did, a-and when I finally admitted I-I loved her, she wanted nothing to do with me because I’d ruined every single chance to love her with my arrogance a-and my stupidity—”

“Dad, dad, easy,” Elliot laughs nervously, rushing to Loki’s side and laying a cautious hand on his arm. “It’s alright.”

Loki pauses, taking a deep breath and glaring at the ground, hating himself for snapping so easily in front of his son.

“Is this…something to do with your past?”

Ignorant little boy. Beautiful, ignorant, clueless, perfect little boy.

“The part you won’t tell us about,” Elliot clarifies. “‘Cause I didn’t mean to trigger anything, dad, I’m sorry, I really didn’t.”

“Don’t apologise.” Loki runs a hand over his face, exhaling heavily and trying to rub away the tears left in his eyes. “Gods, don’t ever apologise to me, I don’t deserve that.”

“Okay, but—”

“And you’d never be a bother,” he keeps whispering, an intensity in his voice to match that burning in his eyes when he grabs Elliot by the shoulders and bends down to eye level. “Thank you for coming to me, I-I’m so sorry I did this to you, put you through this—”

“We’re baaack!”

Frigg flounces through the door, slamming it behind her—right in your face, but you just sigh and trudge in after her.

“There she is,” Loki laughs, squeezing Elliot’s arm once more before bending down to swoop his little princess into his arms.

A flicker of light flashes over Loki’s face, a split second of changing energy, too quick for your tired eyes to catch or for Frigg to notice in the midst of her hug—Elliot sees it.

He glances up at his father, seeing a smiling, fresh face, full of light and nothing like the broken man he’d just encountered.

Elliot’s learning that his dad is a really good liar.

“Get expelled yet?” Loki plants a kiss on Frigg’s cheek, smiling all the while.

“Not yet,” she giggles, hugging him tight around the neck. “M’gonna need some help for that.”

“Just tell me what you need.”

“Loki,” you yawn, waving a hand at the three of them. “Don’t encourage this, she’s already gaining supporters on the playground.”

“Are you really?” Loki sets her down, grabbing her hand and guiding her in a quick twirl. “You’ll be a fearsome queen one day, Frigg. I can already see you on your throne, leading your people to prosper—”

“How about a shower for her majesty first,” you jump in with a pointed look to your husband, “and ruling kingdoms later??”

“I would listen to the current queen, if I were you.” Loki raises an eyebrow at his daughter. “Obey and you might just survive her rule.”

Frigg immediately straightens up, flinging a stiff salute at you and bolting off down the hallway to her room.

“Good lord,” you groan, sinking into a chair at the table. “She’s…she’s…your child.”

You wave a hand at Loki.

“Goddess of mischief,” he laughs, and Elliot glances at him—there’s no use hiding it anymore, right? Frigg’s gone, you’re here…

Nope. Loki walks to your side, tilts your head up to plant a kiss to your lips, brushing his thumb over your cheek as you hum happily and lean against him.

“Well, I attempted a risotto.” Loki sighs and gestures at the mess across the kitchen. “I had hoped to surprise you, but…no such luck.”

“Aw, thank you,” you mumble, reaching for him again and pulling him down for another sloppy kiss. “S’sweet of you, I bet it’s really good.”

“It’s…not.”

Elliot wants to laugh, awkwardly watching the two of you, but it’s more painful than heartwarming or humorous to watch his dad act this time, knowing what he’s really hiding.

“Want me to order takeout again?” Plastering a smile on his face, Elliot walks over and gives you a quick hug.

“That…might be best,” you reply, hugging your son back and giving Loki a sheepish grin over his shoulder. “Unless you wanna eat it anyways, Loki?”

“No.” Loki shakes his head with a laugh. “I’ll cook for you tomorrow, it’ll be better, I promise.”

Elliot desperately wants to say something, warn you about what happened and suggest maybe you eat the attempted meal anyways, but Loki just smiles and laughs and ruffles a hand through his hair.

“Thanks, Elliot.”

His smile seems sad behind the facade, and he squeezes Elliot’s arm as he walks by—almost like he wants to say something more.

But he doesn’t, he takes your hand in his and follows you as you lead him out of the kitchen, apparently unbothered by what just happened.

…leaving Elliot standing in the middle of the kitchen, extremely confused.

* * * *

After a lovely dinner with thankfully only one wonton thrown across the table—you’d expected Frigg to start it, but nope, thanks, Loki, very mature—you noticed Loki’s a bit…off.

Not terribly off, no, just acting a little bit strange.

A little distant, distracted, and he doesn’t even laugh when you tell him about the “mimicking the principals voice and telling her teacher he’s fired” phone call that Frigg had managed to pull off today.

His mind is clearly elsewhere as you kiss your kids goodnight and send them off to bed, clearly elsewhere when you drag him out of his little library-office to go get ready for bed, only for him to flop onto the mattress and curl in on himself, hugging his knees to his chest.

“Okay, what’s going on?”

Climbing onto the bed and poking his turned back, you peek over his shoulder. “Seriously, Loki, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” He pulls a pillow over his head.

Very. Very. Mature.

“You’re a bad liar,” you sing, yanking the pillow off his head and pressing a loud smooch to his cheek before he can protest. “How many times do I have to tell you? I can see right through you, trickster.”

“You’re just nosy,” he grumbles, but sits up and crosses his arms. “I only ruined every good idea my son may have had of me, that’s all, will you leave me alone now?”

You blink a couple times in shock, flabbergasted and more than confused.

“What are you talking about?? Elliot loves you, he thinks you’re incredible!” You scramble over the bed to wrap your arms around him, hugging him tight to your chest. “You’re his biggest role model, his hero, my hero, and we love you. And like hell I’m gonna leave you alone, nice try.”

“He came to me asking for my advice.”

“Loki, that’s amazing,” you murmur, stroking a hand through his hair. “I can only imagine how much that must mean to you, that’s wonderful, snowflake—”

“Know what I did?”

Voice gone sour, he pushes out of your hug and looks you intently in the eye.

“Yelled,” he hoarsely tells you. “I yelled and I punched the counter and I told him that I hated you, and-and I cried, I broke down and wept in front of my son like a fool, a-and—”

A sob cracks through the room.

“Fuck.” He drops his head to his hands, shoulders shaking. “Damn it, I can’t stop fucking crying.”

Heart pounding, you hurry to sit on the edge of the bed next to him, rubbing a comforting hand up and down his spine.

“Hey, Loki, honey…where’s all this coming from?”

“Like hell I know,” he spits, hiding his face in his hands, hunched over with elbows on his knees as you try to comfort him. “I had a chance. I had a fucking chance with him and I threw it away, made his ‘advice’ all about my own sick problems like the selfish, fucking idiot I am.”

“Loki! You’re not selfish, what the hell are you talking about?”

“Yes, I am, my son came to me admitting to possibly being in love with someone and by the end of the conversation, my son was comforting me, being gentle with me, reassuring me in my relationship—”

“Wait, wait, Elliot’s in love with someone?”

Loki’s mouth snaps shut—the more he thinks about it, he’d nearly forgotten the initial topic of Elliot’s asking for advice.

“That’s what he told me,” he answers quietly, staring at his hands. “Someone named Morgan. We didn’t even get to talk much about it before I ruined the moment, as you know I do so well.”

A smile tugs at the corners of your mouth as you take his hands in yours—finally, Elliot.

“Well, that’s wonderful,” you laugh, rubbing his back and tilting his head up with a finger under his chin. “But know what’s even better?”

The glare Loki shoots you could only be described as royal.

“He told you.” Your fingers curl around his jaw and you pull him closer. “Your son still told you that, he came to you and wanted to share that with you, he wanted your advice, Loki.”

“Yes, and I ruined it and pushed him away like I always do, I just told him to go talk to you.”

“He didn’t.” Resting your forehead against his, you stroke a thumb along his jaw, smiling softly at him. “He never said anything about this to me, snowflake, he wants you to help him.”

“Oh.”

Loki falls silent, head slowly leaning into your touch.

Whenever you hold him like this, arm around his shoulders and now hugging his head in the crook of your neck, running languid fingers through his hair, Loki swears he can count the days of his life.

This seems so…mortal. This whole failure thing.

Humans are so good at failing—it’s the one thing he’s noticed since he first started watching Midgard.

You’re good at failing. It doesn’t scare you, it seems; you rush head-on into uncharted territory and look for things to try, just so you can fail and try again.

You actually like his failures, calling them opportunities and learning experiences and helping him back up, forgiving him time and time again like the clueless idiot you must be to love him—

More failure, his mind spins, just another person to disappoint.

He’s known that since the first moment he held Elliot’s tiny form in his hands.

Your fingers curl and brush through his hair, heartbeat steady under his head.

“…what do I do?”

You press your lips to his forehead, brushing some strands of hair behind his ear. “You could start by going a little easier on yourself. Have some faith that you’re not completely unlovable.”

He gives a dry laugh. “Not completely?”

“Mmm…I don’t know,” you giggle, hoping your smile can help get him back on his feet. “There’s just something about you I can’t help but love.”

Half a lopsided smile tugs at his lips.

“I’ll try.”

“Good.” You hop to your feet to stand in front of him, grabbing his face between your hands and gazing seriously into his eyes. “Know what else?”

“What?”

“I’m pretty sure Elliot’s room is just a hallway away. And I’m pretty sure he’s still awake, wondering how the hell to successfully court a certain fair maiden.”

“Oh, gods, no.” Loki stands up, furiously shaking his head. “What am I supposed to tell him? Well,” he sarcastically starts, “you could always burn down her office building, asking her to kill you seemed to work well for me—”

“No, no, no,” you laugh, jumping up after him and pulling him into another hug. “Just talk to him about…doing nice things for her, things he wouldn’t normally do. Just get him to talk about his feelings about her, and report everything back to me, I’ve been waiting years for these two to get together.”

Loki frowns. “You know this girl?”

“You do, too, snowflake.” A giddy grin spreads across your face. “Morgan?”

“Wait, no.” His eyes wide, he takes a step away from you. “No, no, no, not Morgan Stark, tell me it’s not her.”

Biting back a laugh, you raise an eyebrow at him. “Do you know any other Morgans?”

“My son is in love with Tony Stark’s daughter.”

“Get used to it.”

“Do you have any idea what hell this is going to unleash?? Stark is going to wring my neck, and gods forbid Elliot ever upset her—if he even allows it—or it’s my own back taking the lashings—”

“Just go,” you laugh, pushing him towards the door. “Teach him how to be just as romantic as you are and just as adorable and absolutely, completely irresistible.”

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

hope you enjoyed, please reblog and feel free to send me ideas!

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[astranne]

ROYAL - Bruce Wayne

undefined

I've never seen a diamond in the flesh 

I cut my teeth on wedding rings in the movies 

And I'm not proud of my address, in the torn up town

No post code envy

I looked up. My gaze caught every little detail. The beautiful but fake-looking women, the handsome men, smoking expensive cigars and talking about money and their big houses. Houses like the Wayne Manor. I felt the glances of the rich men trying to undress me with their mere eyes. But it didn't really bother me, I always liked the attention of men. I always loved the way how I affected men. But this was different. They had women by their side and fucked me with their eyes.

Slowly, I made my way upstairs. My long, black coat hid my dress. Everyone wore pastel colors, it was the dress code after all. The butler of the family Wayne smiled pleasantly and nodded in my direction.

„Miss Jackson, it's a pleasure to see you at the gala. May I have your coat?"

„Alfred, please, call me Lara. You've known me for many years."

„Indeed, Lara." I smiled and took off my coat. Alfred raised an eyebrow at my dress but didn't say a thing.

„You look like your mother, Lara. She would be very proud of you."

„Thank you, Alfred. But I couldn't have done it without you." He reached his arm to me, I smiled and took it.

„I'm afraid, but Master Bruce wouldn't approve that," he made reference to the dress. It was scandalous. Scandalous red.

„Well Alfred, you should know, I don't care about the opinion of a rich man. I never did."

„I know, dear. I know." Our way led us to the big saloon, full of laughter and rich people. It wasn't my world, it will never be and still, I'm here.

But every song's like gold teeth, 

Grey Goose, trippin' in the bathroom 

Bloodstains, ball gowns, trashin' the hotel room 

We don't care, we're driving Cadillacs in our dreams 

But everybody's like Cristal, Maybach, diamonds on your timepiece Jet planes, islands, tigers on a gold leash 

We don't care, we aren't caught up in your love affair

I inspected every woman and every man. There were models, actors, politicians, businessmen... rich people. Before I could do my way to a waiter serving the champagne, a young man stopped next to me. Another followed him and flashed a flirtatious smile towards me. Both had black hair, blue eyes and were muscular. They were handsome men. But too young for me.

„Good evening, my lady. You look beautiful." The one with the longer hair took my hand and kissed it.

„I must say, red fits you well, beautiful lady. May I know your name?"

„Lara Jackson. With whom do I have the pleasure?" Before any of them could answer, a little boy stepped between us, he looked like ten, but his hard look didn't belong to a child.

„Grayson, Todd. If I find this woman in anyone's room tonight, I will kill you. We don’t have time for this."

„What do you want, demon spawn?" The child huffed and crossed his arms.

„Father wants to speak with you. Both of you." Both rolled their eyes.

„I'm sorry, beautiful lady. The old man can’t have a fun night. We will see us again." The one with the white streak in his black hair kissed my cheek, the other my hand.

„Idiots. Please forgive my brothers, they don't have any respect for a good looking lady."

„It's okay. And thank you."

„You're familiar", he noticed. I just raised an eyebrow. This child was odd. Just like his father.

„Well, I know your father, Damian." His head shoots up and he frowned.

„How do you know me? Or him?"

„It was many years ago, but your father and I had a great friendship. One day he went missing and the day he came back, he wasn't the same anymore. Still, I stayed in contact with Alfred, he was a great friend and like a father to me."

„Why did my father abandon you?"

„I'm not rich." He looked confused but didn’t say anything.

„He never said something about you. Why not?"

„Again Damian. I'm not rich. I will never be like these models or actresses. I'm just a simple girl, that lived alone with her mother. It was a coincidence, that your father and I met."

And we'll never be royals 

It don't run in our blood 

That kind of lux just ain't for us 

We crave a different kind of buzz

„Then why are you here, Jackson?"

„I wanted to see Alfred. I wanted to see the house since it was my second home. And for the last time, I wanted to feel the atmosphere at a gala."

„It sounds like a goodbye. Why? What did my father do that you are such full of hate?" I looked surprised at him.

„How?", I just asked.

„I know that look. You don't hate my father, you hate that rich life, you hate his behavior. I'm also like this. I hate my mother, well, if you can call her a mother. And I hate my stupid brothers, who get more attention from my father then I do. I know they spend more time with him and know him better, but it’s..."

„Frustrating", I finished his sentence.

„I like you." I smiled and sipped at my champagne.

„Well Damian, I like you too."

„More than your brothers." He smiled smugly and I snorted silently.

Let me be your ruler, you can call me Queen B 

And baby I'll rule (I'll rule I'll rule I'll rule) 

Let me live that fantasy

„If you see them, could you clarify for me, that I'm definitely not interested? They are too young. Goodlooking, but too young."

„With pleasure, Lara."

I stayed the whole evening with Damian. He was a cute child, but he would never allow anyone to say that out loud. And he looked like his father. Well, almost. His eyes were green, they must be from his mother. But I didn't ask since he made clear, that his mother was a forbidden topic.

After that evening, I spent the night with Oliver Queen. We were both drunk and afterward, I found out that he had a girlfriend. So I did the one most logical thing, I ran away and swore, I will never be just a woman for a night. These times are now past, I want to be someone special, someone, that my mother can be proud of. So I began to search for my father. I never knew or saw him. But I wanted to find him.

My friends and I we've cracked the code 

We count our dollars on the train to the party 

And everyone who knows us knows that we're fine with this 

We didn't come from money

After months of searching and traveling around the world, I found him. Well, he found me. He didn't know he had a daughter. My mother never told him about me. But he didn't abandon me like other people. He gave me a new home, a new task. He gave me a new family. I began to train, train to defend myself, train to defend others, train to kill. Especially rich people who were assholes. I just followed my father's footsteps. You may ask now, who my father is. Im a Wilson now. My father is called Slade Wilson but feared as Deathstroke.

I was educated by the League of the Shadows also called the League of Assassins. Ra's al Guhl himself trained me and let me fight against his daughter, who is the mother of Damian. Talia al Guhl, or whatever they call her. I hate her. I hate her for manipulating Bruce and abandon her son. I hate her for her behavior, I just hate her presence. And everybody knows that. Because I almost killed her. Well, I killed her, but she was brought back with the Lazarus Pit. My father was really proud of me since nobody can stand her. I mean, she is a fucking bitch, she betrayed the League just for a son of Batman. And did so many other awful things. But that's not my problem anymore. Ra's send me to protect his grandson, the heritage of the League. The fact, Damian liked me, made my job so much easier. But I had no idea, how to become one of the Wayne family members. So we built a plan. My father as Deathstroke, would try to kill Robin and Batman, and I would save them both. After all the planning, it worked perfectly.

„Who are you?"

„Your pseud, deep voice doesnt scare me, Batman. You've just could thank me."

„Lara?"

„Hello, Damian. Its nice to see you again"

„I thought you would never come back to Gotham." I fake sighed and crossed my arms.

„Well... I was all around the world. I met your mother and I must say, she is a bitch. Sadly she survived our meeting." Batman huffed.

„And how did you know about the whole hero thing?"

„Talia is a really shitty secret keeper. She told me all about it, in the hope, I would show some mercy. Its nice to see you, Bruce."

„Who are you?"

„Its a shame, you dont recognize me, Brucie." I took my black hood off, also my mask, that hid the lower half of my face. I could feel the confusion of my childhood crush.

„Lara Jackson?"

„What a welcome." I was surprised after he hugged me. Awkwardly, I tapped his back.

„Im so sorry." That was easier than I thought.

„It’s okay, Brucie. It’s okay." Damian coughed and crossed his arms.

„Umm... can I have a bed for tonight?", I asked silently.

„You can have a bed as long as you want, Lara."

„Thank you, Bruce."

„Lets go home." He jumped off the roof, Damian followed him. I turned around and saw my father in the shadows. With a smirk, I followed the Waynes.

But every song's like gold teeth, 

Grey Goose, trippin' in the bathroom 

Bloodstains, ball gowns, trashin' the hotel room 

We don't care, we're driving Cadillacs in our dreams 

But everybody's like Cristal, Maybach, diamonds on your timepiece Jet planes, islands, tigers on a gold leash 

We don't care, we aren't caught up in your love affair

I was now a month at Wayne Manor. Bruce acted a little bit strange but I didn't mind. But what I minded was his big family. He has five sons and two daughters and other family members. They didn't trust me. Richard and Jason always flirted with me, the other women in the house hated me for that. Until one day.

„Hey, beautiful. What are you doin’?" I just rose an eyebrow, a move I would do every day.

„Do you have eyes, Jason?"

„Yes, why?"

„Well, then you can see, I’m reading." He sat aside me and wiggled his eyebrows.

„Mind, if I take this book and we do something?" I tried to ignore him.

„Darlin', I know you would take me. Don't act so heartless even though its hot as fuck." And then I had enough.

„Okay, listen, Jason. I'm not interested to fuck you or Richard. I'm so much older than you, I could be your fucking mother! And if you don't stop, I’m gonna kick your fucking ass so hard, that the pit wont help you come back to life! So shut the fuck up and just let me live my fucking life! Without you or Richard or any playboy." He just blinked.

„How old are you?", he asked bluntly. I slapped him with the book. Jason yelled and ran away from the couch.

„Jason Peter Todd! Come back, you fucking asshole! I'm going to fucking killing you, you dipshit! You don't ask a woman about her age! COME BACK!" I ran after him, passing next to Richard and Tim.

„Jason!", I yelled. „Come back, you motherfucking bastard!" He sprinted downwards, trying to escape. With the speed I had gained, I jumped down and rolled off.

„What the fuck! That woman! Help! Anyone!"

„Shut up!" I tackled him down and began to punch him. Blood spattered out of his nose, ruining the expensive carpet.

„What the fuck?! Lara? Jason?" Dick tried to separate us but he also collected a punch in his nose.

„Don't touch me, you pervert!" Jason managed to escape out of my hold and we began to fight, Richard joined, after I kicked him in his stomach.

„Bruce? Alfred? Anyone? Lara is going crazy!", Tim shouted. He was smart enough to stay out of our fight. I swiped the blood out of my face, not knowing to whom it belonged.

„Still imagining how to fuck me?" Both men grunted, trying to punch me, which I easily caught. My hands gripped Richard's shoulders and I let his nose met my head. He groaned and held his nose, trying to kick me.

„Enough!" I heard Bruce's voice and stepped a little back. Jason didn't stop and punched right in my jaw. I growled and rushed forward, my legs slung around his neck, and threw him on the ground.

„Lara! Enough!" It took Bruce, Tim, and Alfred to keep me away from the second oldest.

And we'll never be royals It don't run in our blood That kind of lux just ain't for us We crave a different kind of buzz

Bruce himself stitched me up, doesn't allow anyone to come too near towards me. He forbid everyone, even Alfred, to come to the Batcave.

„Why?", he just asked. I huffed and crossed my arms.

„Why? Both were flirting with me! Its disgusting! I could be their fucking mother!"

„They are kids, Lara", he sighed and sat across me. I rolled my eyes.

„Kids don’t fight the Joker, Bruce." It was silent, we just sat there.

„Why are you like this?"

„What do you mean?" I frowned.

„You're cold. Towards me. I have the feeling, you only like Alfred and Damian", he almost whispered. I swallowed and tried to avoid his gaze.

„Bruce, I...I had a hard childhood. I just had my mother and you. You were my best friend, my first love. And when my mother passed, I was alone. I know, you were there for me, but not like the way I wanted. I changed Bruce, I'm not the glamorous girl anymore."

„Why you didn't say anything?"

„You were Bruce Wayne, the son of millionaires, the heritage of Wayne Enterprises. I was madly in love with you, I never said something because I was so scared. Scared, that you wouldnt love me back, scared you would see me just like as a friend. So I started to date other boys, boys who gave me attention in a way, who filled the gap my mother left. It was like a drug. I loved the way I affected every man. They gave me love, physically." At the end of my speech, I'd met Bruces eyes. They were soft and full of love.

„Im so sorry, Lara. I never- If I ever would know that...Do you remember your first boyfriend?" He didn't wait for an answer.

„I was so jealous and I saw you at his side it made me clear, you weren't the little girl anymore, who I met at my parents funeral. In my eyes, you were a grown, beautiful and independent woman. That day I realized, I loved you from the first day and still do." My eyes grew big. How?

„You still love me?", I whispered.

„I do." I almost melted at these words. My fucking childhood crush, my first love, loves me. He smiled and leaned towards me. Our noses touched, my eyes fluttered. He stopped, obviously waiting for me. I sighed when our lips finally met. We kissed slowly, without any tongue. It was a romantic kiss, heck, he would top every Hollywood movie. We parted, his lips brushed against mine. Bruce cupped my face with his hands and kissed me again. Roughly. A light moan escaped my lips, my hands tugged his black hair. He groaned deeply and heat rushed downwards all around my body. His arms pulled me nearer to him. Slowly, while kissing him, I climbed on his lap. But before it could go any farther, Alfred cleared his throat. I blushed and tried to hide my face in Bruce's neck while he just chuckled.

Let me be your ruler, you can call me Queen B 

And baby I'll rule (I'll rule I'll rule I'll rule)

Let me live that fantasy

Everything was perfect. As perfect as it could be in such a chaotic family. Since I beat up Jason and Richard, everyone tries to not piss me off. I warmed up to the girls and also Tim. Everything was perfect until Talia showed up. She and some traitors of the league managed to break into the Manor and tied the whole Wayne Family up.

„Hello, Lara. Its nice to see you again." A mad smile graced her face. I didn't respond and gripped the handle of my sword harder.

„Why are you here, Talia?"

„Oh I don’t know, maybe to kill you?" I rolled my eyes.

„Besides that." She grinned widely at me.

„I want my son back."

„No." She frowned, the Waynes behind me began to protest.

„No? Who do you think you are? I’m the mother of him!"

„Well, I don't care who you are Talia. You're a traitor and I don't listen to traitors."

„Wilson", she growled.

„Al Guhl."

„My son."

„No."

„I want my son! And I will kill you to get him!"

„Try me, bitch. I killed you once and I will do it again."

„Why are you here?", she asked out of nowhere.

„Classified."

„Really, Wilson?"

„Why is mother naming her Wilson?", whispered Damian to his father. Before Bruce could answer, Talia rushed with a war cry forward raising her sword. I easily dodged, spinning around and kicking her in her stomach.

„You have a deathwish, Al Guhl. Stop it and I will let you go."

„Never, Wilson", she spat and rammed her sword in my leg. I gritted my teeth but fought on. I felt, how my wound slowly stopped bleeding until it closed completely. But the pain was still there.

„How-?", she stuttered.

„You should've known, dear Talia. The reason, why Im a better fighter than you, the reason, why I could kill you. All because of my fathers powers."

„Your father has powers? But he is no metahuman."

„Who said he is a mutant? He's an experiment, he's an improved human. So am I."

„That's why you could learn so fast to fight", she realized.

„Yes. And now, get out of here, or I kill you and your friends."

We're bigger than we ever dreamed, and I'm in love with being queen (Ooh ooh oh) 

Life is great without a care 

We aren't caught up in your love affair

„Who is your father, Lara?" I sighed at Damian's question.

„Does it really matter right now?"

„Hell yes it does!", shouted Jason. „I want some awesome powers too!" I rolled my eyes.

„I never knew my father, Bruce knows that. And my mother never told him, that she was pregnant. After I met Damian, I began to search for my father. Without any results. Then, he found me. He's a member of the league of the assassins, so he brought me there and I was trained."

„You didn't answer Damians question”, Bruce noticed. I sighed again and shouldered my backpack.

„Because I knew, you all wouldn't like it. Damian, your grandfather send me to protect you. My job is done, I will go back to Nanda Parbat."

„What?"

„No!", they cried out.

„Why? I thought you-", I interrupted Bruce.

„Bruce, I love you. I really do. But I know, when you learn, who my father is, you will abandon me. So I better go by myself."

„Wait, what? Are you and Bruce a thing?" Jason's eyes switched between us.

„We were."

And we'll never be royals 

It don't run in our blood 

That kind of lux just ain't for us 

We crave a different kind of buzz 

Let me be your ruler, you can call me Queen B 

And baby I'll rule (I'll rule I'll rule I'll rule) 

---

Masterlist

This was my first oneshot in english, I hope you like it. You can also find it on Wattpad, there I have the same username like on Tumblr. 

I’m aware, that not everything I wrote matches with the personalities of the batfam, I have more knowledge of the MCU and MARVEL. And if something is wrong with my english (my first language is german) please tell me. :) 

[letmyselfcare]

Reverse all means of space and time, and what you are left with is a vast nothingness. The words haunted my mind as the skyline of southern Florida turned into a murky dim light of night. The brightness of the sun faded while a new one took over: rays of the city and all of its boisterous party life. Lexi was not kidding— Miami was nothing short of a party. The streets were filled with people of all shapes and sizes, laughing and talking through rose colored glasses. The colors were bright all around and from every corner of the city music of life and happiness seemed to be playing loud.

It was much different from what I was used to; my life was normally filled with seclusion. Hiding in the shadows… away from people and keeping to myself was how I liked most of my days to be. A total and complete utter darkness. Maybe that was why she wanted me to come here, to get away from the personal hell I lived inside of. Here in this city, I imagined it was hard to live in shades of guilt and self hatred. I also imagined it was easy to give into self pleasures. This was a place I knew my darker self would thrive in. A literal utopia of gluttony for the monster within me. I wouldn't give into the temptation.

With the seduction of hunger came an evil within me that wasn't so easily brushed aside. I didn't leave Mystic Falls in an attempt to save innocent people's lives only to come here and end more. Pulling my car off to the side of the main downtown area, I parked it in one of the dark secluded parts of the city before making a round of the area myself. Life and luxury colored the town for all it was worth as far as I could tell. In that I stuck out like a sore thumb. I wasn't ready for Miami as much as I wanted to be— that much became clearly evident. With wandering eyes paying me mind, I ducked my head and kept to myself for as much as it was worth.

After walking several blocks it wasn't until I saw “The Blackbird” that I knew I was in the right direction. It was a dark and sort of mysterious bar that drew in much attention from the outside. To someone like myself, I knew it was a haven for the supernatural. Every big city like this had one or two places that crawled with vampires— a lux hotspot where we didn't have to hide ourselves. It was a blessing and a curse to someone like me; someone who craved humanity and decency but was also hiding from the darkest parts of themselves.

There was a line out the front of the door, with a few large bouncers guarding the entrance. “Are you on the list?” The dark haired and broad shouldered man questioned me as I voided the line and made way towards the front without hesitation. He screamed of intimidation in a way that most humans would have been put off by. I stood my ground.

“My friend told me to meet her here,” It was a bland excuse, but the best one I could come up with. It was not solely humans lined up at the door, but also low grade vampires. Clearly I wouldn't stand a chance if I didn't use the best card in my pocket.

The guard laughed mockingly. “What's her name?”

“Lexi Branson.” The confidence behind my voice was wavering but I knew it was my only option. I didn't want to let Lexi know I was here just yet— doing so would open an entire can of worms that was best left sealed for now. If she was going to be anywhere in the city, I knew it would be here. She thrives off the party, the fun and all it was worth. I couldn't knock her for it, but I also couldn't bring myself to enjoy those same attitudes just yet. I wasn't in control of myself the way she was…

The guard gave a look to me in question, staring me down for several long seconds before finally motioning for me to enter through the doors behind him. Was I shocked I was right about Lexi? No. After you had known someone for well over one hundred years, their every move became as well known as the back of your hand. I knew her inside and out just as she had me— Lexi was more than my best friend, she was a part of my mind in the same way Damon was.

I could hear the loud music pounding from outside the bar and it only grew as I walked further into the dark entrance. Through the words of music, my own voice began to roar in the back of my head: There was no life, no means of hope. Just an empty space which would one day grow into something beyond imaginable. Something with meaning. Much like the shift in the universe, your life could change as well. One moment all could seem wrong, and as you open your eyes to the new day there is change. Is that what this was now for me? Change?

Extravagance was nothing short of how to describe the scenery around me. It oozed of wealth and finery that was nothing short of wonders. A clear hideaway for all eternal life and the beauty it held. It was also a staple of power in that regard; a grab at influence that left everyone in here seeming higher than life itself. From all corners around me, while dark and gloomy, I could make out people drinking, dancing, and chatting amongst themselves. Through the air the smell of sexual arousal and blood mixed like some sort of intoxicated perfume . My stomach curled but I walked on.

Much like on the street before entering, there were a few eyes that turned my way. I was new here and that much didn't go past the vampires around me. While it should have been comforting to know I was surrounded by people much like myself, instead it put me on high alert. I didn't trust a single soul here. As eternal creatures, we were inherently selfish. We did mostly what suited ourselves the best above all others. I was on the disadvantage of course with my lack of human blood. I didn't know where my next meal would come from… I didn't know if that was the best thing to think about now.

Making a direct line towards the bar, I did my best to keep an eye out for long blonde hair through the sea of people. I sought out a singular energy, but nothing here felt familiar. It was lonely in a way I was not expecting, and that left me feeling puzzled. In a room full of people, without the one you wanted most, you could feel so alone. As I reached the bar, I waited off to the side before one of the bartenders paid mind to my presence.

“What are you drinking tonight?” She was average height and olive toned with a voice soft through the music around. It caught me by surprise, somehow unexpected as her face was hardened. Though to be in a place like this, I'm sure it was easy to look angry. Especially as… a human. Suddenly I realized all the people working here had been human with the expectation of the men outside. A sudden sadness washed over me as I looked at her— what kind of life was she living working here?

“I'll just take a scotch on the rocks.” A reached for my wallet, a trivial item as a vampire as I could merely take whatever I wanted without consequence, but she shook her head when I handed out a twenty dollar bill.

“You must be new,” Her gentle voice added with a laughter through the noise around us. She began to make my drink for me only to soon notice the confusion on my face. “You don't pay here, you're a vampire. Obviously.”

“Was it that obvious?” It was hard to tell. As a human, the only vampire I ever knew was Katherine. Though her beauty stuck me from the moment I met her, I never knew what a human would see when they looked into my eyes. Did I appear with the same appeal Katherine had to me all those years ago? Or did I come across like a normal human? I placed the money back into my wallet and tucked it away. All of this show and dance around me felt incredibly sad in a way, yet if I were human I knew it would hold a much different regard. How did she see this place?

The brunette girl behind the bar nodded her head and slid my drink over to me. “You scream newbie, pretty boy. Watch out…” Her wide doe-like eyes gave me a wink in a way that was far too playful for the haunting look on her face. “Someone here just might take advantage of that.”

I wanted to question what that meant— it was far too ominous to sit properly. Just as my mouth began to open, to even dare put meaning behind the warning, silence caught in my throat instead.

“Now Hayley,” A female voice from behind me dared to break the space between me and the bartender. A single hand was placed on my back, and suddenly I was thrown back into a time and space that was all too familiar to me. A world I had craved for days, knowing it was the right place to be. Lexi. I turned my back to see her bright eyes and mischievous face warning the girl behind the bar: “Don't go scaring Stefan off. He only just got here, and I plan on him staying for awhile.”

[books--andt]

Before I Fall by Lauren Oliver Review and Discussion

Hello lovely book people! Hope you're having a terrific reading year so far.

So Lauren Oliver was one of the first authors I read that gripped me. I was so attached and obsessed with her Delirium series; I couldn't put it down and it introduced me to the bookish community! That was nearly two years ago and since then I haven't read anything more by her. I know! Crazy!

Before I Fall is about a popular high school girl named Samantha Kingston. To the blind eye she has it all; popularity, a cool group of friends, a hot boyfriend. But Samantha soon realizes that these are not things that will be on her "greatest hits" list. On February 12th Samantha and her friends hit up a party and on their way home suffer a car crash. The peculiar thing about it is, Sam wakes up the next morning as if nothing happened, and once she checks the date and realizes that it's still February 12th, she understands that nothing really did happen. Sam lives February 12th over and over, frustrated and finally accepts that she must change events that happened that day to make things right.

I enjoyed this book. I had some problems with it here and there but all in all it was an interesting read that grabbed my attention and I really wanted to know how it ended. I have some deeper thoughts so I'm going to move into some spoilers now! If you haven't read this book read no further!

***SPOILERS AHEAD***

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Alrighty hey spoiler people! So first things first- Samantha. What. A. Bitch. I had a hard time reading from her perspective and actually liking her just because of the things she'd say or do. That goes for Lindsey an her other friends as well. While Elody and Ally may not have been as mean as Lindsey, they were followers and didn't stand up for themselves or anyone else. Samantha kept saying how much she loved Lindsey ad how great she was, despite all of the things she's done wrong. But for me I just couldn't see the goodness in her. She was fake; she could drop Sam any time she wanted and make her the least popular girl in school; she was mean to others and frankly didn't give a shit about their feelings. Sure she had problems of her own, but she would never face those problems because she was scared that others would find out and *over exaggerated gasp* she'd become less popular!!

This book can really bring back memories of high school. But for me, high school wasn't about popularity or parties or any of that. So I didn't relate to that level of the book either. I've always believed in standing up for others or what you believe in, no matter what, so when Samantha would laugh until her stomach hurt about a joke that Lindsey or Ally would make about Juliet Sykes or Kent I just.... Didn't find it funny at all.

However Sam did grow on me as the story progressed, which I guess is kind of the point. Sam lives the same day, February 12th, seven times. And I get that she had to relive the same day for an entire week before she comprehended what she needed to do, but sometimes the story just felt tedious. It didn't drag for me, I thought the pacing was actually quite good, but just certain things were said over and over and it bothered me a bit.

Okay so now for the elephant in the room; the ending. OH. MY. GAWD. I honestly wasn't expecting it and I don't really know what to think or feel and I'm slightly confused. Did she actually die on the seventh day???????? Or was she dead the entire time and just had to "make things right" before she could be fully accepted in the afterlife??????

I was waiting and waiting and waiting for Samantha to have this epiphany at Kent's party and STAND THE HELL UP for Juliet in front of EVERYONE. I personally think that would have been a lot more powerful; her telling Lindsey to back off and stop people from shouting "Psycho! Psycho!" and pouring their drinks on her, rather than her just following her to the highway and saying all this crap that made ZERO sense to Juliet and trying to stop her from jumping in front of moving vehicles. Maybe my preferred ending would have been too cliche, but I just think it would've been more powerful and would actually show us readers that Samantha HAS changed.

And alas... Samantha realizes that in order to make things right, in order to stop herself from living the same day over and over, she must sacrifice her LIFE for Juliet. I understand this and Lauren Oliver did a good job surprising me and making me FEEL something but like.... gahhh!!! What about Sam's little sister?? She would be devastated. What about Kent???? He's SOOOOO confused about everything that happened between them since, to him, they haven't spoken at all in years! And Sam was always such a bitch to him, then all of a sudden she's nice, but then NOPE PSYCH she dies?????

And what about her friends??? Does she really think that killing herself is going to stop Lindsey from being a bitch to others? I'd hope that Lindsey would make the connection, and realize that Sam saved Juliet Sykes but... I just don't know.

And of course, how is Juliet Sykes supposed to feel??? She'd probably feel horrible that someone else dies for her, and she probably doesn't understand the half of why she did it!

I can only hope that all is pieced back together after Samantha sacrificed herself. But what if she was dead all along? I'm only wondering this because Samantha says something at the end of the book like, "I saw hair so bright and white it looked like a halo" and she also says she can hear Juliet saying "you saved me" and "why did you save me?" sooooo was Juliet dead all along? Did they all die in that first car crash this whole time???

All in all I liked this book. If a book makes you think about it after you've read it, if you hate some of the characters, or if you really want to know what will happen next as you read it, then the author did something right!

I'm happy I read this book before the movie comes out and I can't wait to see it. I'm liking the casting that I've seen so far. The girl who plays Lindsey looks spot on, and I think Zoey Deutch will do a good job playing Samantha.

What are your thoughts on this book or on the casting for the movie? I'd love to know!

Star rating: 3.5/5 stars.

Psssst- I've been really active on my bookstagram lately and you should totally check it out --> books_andt

Thanks for reading!

- T

[tortuga-aak]

I went to the Plaza's finishing school to learn how to be a better millennial — and it turns out I'm a monster

Thrillist's Eliza Dumais attended the Plaza's etiquette course tailored to modern New York millennials.

The instructor recommended wearing full body suits instead of underwear, and never carrying more than one bag at a time.

She also taught a "swivel and pop" move for exiting cabs.

The course did not discuss Instagramming food at the table, or how to hold a dinner party in New York-sized apartments.

As it turns out, I am a monster.

Not only did I arrive at the Plaza for Myka Meier's social and dining etiquette course five minutes late (I blame the R train), but I was also wearing a T-shirt, which, in a room of adults dressed in suitable prom attire, felt on par with arriving completely naked.

I sat too close to the table (you should be 4 inches away, apparently) for easier access to the spread of hummus and cheese, which I learned I was not to consume until after I had placed it on the correct section of my plate (bottom right is for spreads and top left is for refuse like pits and cheese rinds).

I dropped an olive, sliced the Gruyere at the wrong angle, and nearly knocked over my water glass while taking furious notes. Clearly, my upbringing in a cereal-for-dinner sort of household had not prepared me for this.

That's where Myka Meier comes in.

Meier is the founder and director of Beaumont Etiquette, a contemporary finishing school stationed within Midtown's Plaza Hotel, where she serves as the primary instructor at the helm of the program's courses. And while it's only natural to associate "etiquette" with ‘50s debutantes and Julie Andrews in The Princess Diaries, according to Meier, her curriculum is "not your grandmother's etiquette."

In spite of her prestigious studies in Switzerland, and later in London as a mentee under a former member of The Royal Household of Her Majesty the Queen, her course is a little nuanced: It's modern etiquette tailored to urban millennials — New York millennials, in particular.

In short, it's intended to serve as something of a guiding light for those who dare to wear sweatpants to brunch, photograph their Smorgasburg snacks before consuming them, and claim an extra seat on the subway for their Strand totes.

Adeline Ramos/You Look Lovely Photography

I had enrolled myself in the course in an effort to determine whether or not I really could be saved from my millennial self by way of finishing school (which, as a 20-something native New Yorker, was allegedly catered specifically to me). If all went according to plan, by the end of the session, I would be the sort of poised New York woman who doesn't send a text saying "I'm three blocks away!" while still pantsless in my apartment.

The choice of venue was obvious given the subject matter: In the grand scheme of New York, The Plaza is high-society manifest. But for all its stately clout, the Midtown venue — which offers a $75 spread of tea sandwiches — does not exactly cater to young folk.

We convened for the course at 7pm in the famed condo/hotel's Palm Court, at which point the restaurant's hostess promptly ushered us to a series of tables to the left of the round trellised bar. Each was set with cloth napkins, silverware, and cardstock itineraries outlining the evening's proceedings in bullet points ("How to be the most charming person in the room," for example).

Once the wine had been poured, we made our perfunctory introductions around the table. I shook hands with the girl to my left, who was dressed in a neat black cocktail dress and seemed to delicately hold my hand for a brief moment rather than actually shake it. She went on to mention casually that she was in New York to assist Meier with her upcoming course in children's etiquette.

The woman to my right, who quickly motioned to the waiter for a wine refill, told me that she was a mother, hoping to pass some of Meier's wisdom along to her own millennial daughter — who had apparently opted out of attending the course first-hand. "Your mother must be so proud you're here!" she exclaimed, reaching for her newly filled glass. I nodded courteously, envisioning my own mother, who was most likely at home in Brooklyn, eating Chinese takeout directly from the container.

Adeline Ramos/You Look Lovely Photography

Shouting above the chatter in the restaurant, a woman on the opposite end of the table explained that she and her grandmother, seated beside her, were here on vacation from the UK — they'd always dreamed of high tea at the plaza (why they hadn't just stopped by for a simple cup of tea was not made clear).

And the last of the remaining pupils, seated next to the British duo, was a woman dressed in a tailored gray pantsuit, who didn't bother to introduce herself at all — the only real potential New Yorker of the bunch. I watched, intrigued, as the mystery woman took a sip of her wine, leaving her glass curiously unmarked in spite of the dark red lipstick she wore.

Like the plaza itself, the patrons were stiff-backed, well-polished, and subdued. But here's what they were not: millennial New Yorkers.

The only real uniting factor amongst the 24 of us, it seemed, was the fact that we'd each paid $125 for two hours of intensive etiquette instruction.

Dressed in a black pencil skirt and a feather-collared pink blouse, the infinitely poised Meier began her lesson with a lecture on personal presentation: She recommended that we wear a full body suit in place of undergarments to "keep everything packed in" (my own underwear had come in a five-for-$27 package deal at Victoria's Secret) and that we never carry more than one bag at a time (I was carrying two tote bags and a purse). She then proceeded to address everything from app dating faux pas to proper "ethnic food consumption" (which amounted to proper spaghetti-twirling) in a way that seemed to walk the line between classic Emily Post-style instruction and a Cosmo dating column. The mother to my right delighted in the spaghetti lesson, waving her fork around in a wand-like fashion in an attempt to mimic Meier.

Adeline Ramos/You Look Lovely Photography

Still, I found myself wondering where the lesson was on sitting through dinner without disrupting an entire restaurant while you photograph every dish on the table (and occasionally other people's tables) for your not-so-viral food Instagram (arguably one of the greatest millennial offenses of our time).

After scrawling a note about "full-body-underwear" illegibly on my notepad, I looked up to find the pantsuit clad woman, who had not so much as lifted her fork for the sake of practice, glancing disapprovingly around the table. I tried to meet her gaze for the sake of solidarity — as if to say this is all a little absurd, isn't it — but she had already returned her attention dutifully to Meier, who resembled an operatic conductor as she continued to wave her cutlery through the air at the front of the room.

Meier went on to demonstrate her "swivel and pop" move — a surefire bend-and-snap-esque method for exiting cabs without flashing the general public, in addition to her quick-change tips for swapping sneakers out for heels. She also had several pieces of advice that were applicable to millennials all over — like the fact that group photos on dating apps are futile and confusing, and that ghosting is an entirely unacceptable method of shutting anyone down, no matter how many times they reference their frat or their 401K during dinner.

Just barely perceptible above the sound of clinking glass and mellow chatter, I heard the pantsuit woman stifle a small giggle — proof that she, too, recognized some measure of irony here. Once again I tried to catch her eye, but it seemed she was too polite to avert her gaze from our gracious instructor.

Amidst all her counsel on social cues, Meier placed particular emphasis on learning how to "get ahead" in a city as cut-throat as New York. "In this city," she noted, "almost everyone is highly motivated, educated, well-dressed, and professional." Surely there is no lack of competition. But as Meier sees it, professional business etiquette is what counts when it comes to measurable success.

She claimed that many decisions in high-volume HR departments are contingent on the most qualified candidates with the best business etiquette — that is to say, knowing proper handshake convention (two pumps means business, three pumps indicate social interaction) could be an indirect line to a six-figure salary. She did not, however, manage to address the significance of proper Slack etiquette (tactful gif selection is an art form), which in today's professional world is arguably a better skill set for "getting ahead" than a strong two-pump handshake.

The majority of the Plaza's etiquette classes (one to two a month) sell out completely — so, the question isn't whether or not there is a market for contemporary etiquette, but rather, who the market consists of.

Meier's rendition of social grace is a much-needed update to the Emily Post classics, but for the most part, I would argue that the millennial New Yorker does not, in fact, need to perfect their pasta-twirling methods.

New York does demand an etiquette all its own, but in place of Meier's course, we might be better off with a lecture on proper subway decorum, UberPool small talk, or how best to host a dinner party when your apartment is the size equivalent of a walk-in closet.

As I filed out of the Plaza's enormous entryway, proudly donning my several bags, I found myself standing across 5th Avenue from the pantsuit woman, cradling a street-vendor hot dog in her left hand and pulling flip-flops out of an enormous black satchel with her right. In spite of her newfound sense of Beaumont polish, she remained an immodest New Yorker, Sabrett hot dog and all — a small victory for the city.

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