#women are not rehab centers for fucked up men

[queen-of-love-and-beauty]

If you say you ship Shaw and Seven not only will I block you in this life but my ghost will hunt you in the next!

[classycookiexo]

VERY…..I hate that black women are constantly seen as redemption centers, mammies and rehabs

I remember when Kanye had one of his meltdowns and people kept saying “he needs a black woman”, as if we’re here to play nurse and coddle like foh

It’s funny cause now the rapper Jeezy is saying the same thing, he married Jeanie Mai and now that he’s left her for whatever reason, he’s now in an interview saying “at our lowest, we need our sistas”

Are you fucking kidding me ? I am not bothered whatsoever when black men date out nor do I have beef with any of the non-black women they get with, I love and respect all races of women but it honestly pisses me off when people treat black women as the labor, struggle and or clean up lady

IT’S DISRESPECTFUL ASF

[marcelinesghost13]

Okay blog definitely got a lot of stuff to talk about I got to get it out of my head.

Well we're going to start off with my dad first. So I had to go see a lawyer today to get guardianship of him. Definitely got some answers about how that process works and what's going to happen with it. He's definitely in need of it simply just because of him being so sick right now. It's definitely going to cost a pretty penny something that I don't have any money for but I'm going to have to figure out a way to make that happen. He definitely needs someone to take care of him and make sure that he's okay cuz he's not well at all.

Then on top of that he's in the rehab center right now and he's driving everybody crazy including me. He will call me up to six times a day and we'll have the same conversation. I really sucks seeing my dad like this he was an absolutely brilliant man and now he's just kind of not all there anymore and it's just kind of sad to see him like that. I know he's going to be at this place till he probably passes away because his health is just complete fucking shit. That's totally sucks also and I hate seeing him so sick. Plus he's not eating at all lately and that makes me really fucking nervous. But I have been calling him once a day or at least visiting him when I can which makes this day you know that much better which makes me happy.

As far as my wife goes she had a complete fucking anxiety meltdown today. She let me know that she absolutely hates me today. Through a couple punches when we were in the car and broke some stuff in the car too unfortunately. She's beyond angry and pissed off simply because of me going through this transition that I'm going through. She thinks it's a betrayal of trust. Because I never told her about it till now. And the reason why I never told her is simply because I was afraid I was going to get this reaction. She's very old school and believes that men should be men and women should be women and the whole trans thing is just a bunch of bullshit. She thinks I'm basically playing games with her and I'm not I'm just becoming who I need to be who I want to be. But she feels like I've completely abandoned her and that I've never been around. Hearing those words really do hurt cuz I've done everything and anything I can do to make sure that she's okay and safe. She does have abandonment issues in a couple other mental conditions which I've talked about before. I can see her getting sicker and sicker and she doesn't see it though. Her skin has been this really weird white color and you can see your veins now. A lot of things trigger her lately just everything and anything. And I'm trying to do as much as I can possibly do to make sure that she's okay. I don't hate her like she thinks I do but she definitely let me know today that she does hate me. She's told me that before though hearing those words they hurt but I know she's not right in the head and that's why she says what she says.

As far as me going I am just moving along doing what I need to do in order to keep my two loved ones you know okay and safe. I'm honestly beyond exhausted. I've been trying to find a therapist but I haven't been able to find one yet. I definitely think that is something that would help me. But I'm not too sure how. Hopefully at some point I'll figure something out. I haven't had any suicidal thoughts lately either which is a good thing. Usually after a really big fight with my wife I get massively depressed and sometimes become suicidal. But that hasn't happened so that's a good thing. All I can do is keep moving forward and try to stay as positive as possible especially since things are so negative right now. Yeah just keep moving forward.

082920241536

[sarahjswift]

Twin Wounds Chapter 7

Don't hate me!! I know it's been a while since Twin Wounds have been updated but I was kind of at a loss for what to write. Then I started my new fanfic and I got inspo for this one lol

Warnings: Language, Verbal Abuse/Manipulation, Mentions of Eating Disorders

Word Count: 1.3k

Tag List <3: @backtobl4ck, @aelinchocolatelover, @blue-bird17, @renxzs, and new member *drumroll*...@autumnbabylon! tysm <3

Okay, I hope you enjoy this episode! IWHAIWSA update coming soon :D

__

Three weeks after Aelin arrived at the Center, Rowan had only just seen her eat more than a small portion of food. 

He watched her eat - slowly but surely - a tray of mashed potatoes and fried chicken. Honestly, it looked pretty terrible, but he was just happy to see her eating. 

“This is amazing,” Eillia breathed beside him. As the nurse mainly stationed to Aelin, she’d voiced her concerns on Aelin’s food intake over these few weeks. After scheduling Aelin for some physical activities, she was finally hungry enough to eat. 

“You were right. Thank you, Rowan.” Eillia’s eyes were wet as she turned to the therapist, squeezing his arm. Rowan’s calculations had been correct - Aelin wasn’t trying to starve herself, she just didn’t have an appetite. After enough physical strain, she would finally regain that. 

“But - how did you know this wasn’t a case of an ED?” the nurse asked, frowning. 

Rowan looked at the beautiful woman sipping from a milk carton and smiled slightly. “I once felt that way.” 

___

“I cannot believe you,” Aelin grumbled into the phone. Her cousin’s laugh sounded through the receiver, and she glared at the wall.

Aedion still hadn’t picked her up, no matter that he’d said two weeks here and she’d be done. His feeble excuse, made a week ago, still rang in her mind - “I’m sorry, Ae. I just…you sound so much better. A few more weeks? Please?”

“Chill, cousin.” Aelin couldn’t help but smile faintly at the sound of laughter in her cousin’s voice. She hadn’t heard that - at least around her - in a year. “I’m coming to visit tomorrow.”

Aelin almost dropped the phone. “What?? You are?” 

“Yeah, I figured I’d drop by.”

Her joy over her cousin coming was quickly replaced with anger. “What, so you could’ve come to visit me this whole time and you just decided not to? What the fuck??”

Aedion gave a long-suffering sigh that made Aelin grind her teeth. “Yes, I could’ve, but I wanted you to adjust - give you time to make some friends.”

“I’m not your fucking kid, Aedion. I don’t need your help making friends!” 

“Well, it’s also a long drive away from my house!”

“Ah yes, one long suffering hour away from your fucking mansion. I guess one hour is too far to see your cousin who is fucking stuck in a rehab center!”

“Alright, cool it on the cursing.” Aelin snorted - he was one to talk. “I’m sorry. It was shitty. But I’m excited to see you?”

The nervousness of the last sentence made her heart soften - ever so slightly - and she loosed a breath and leaned against the wall. “Yeah, okay. That’ll be nice. And by the way…I have made some friends.” 

“Oh? Who?”

“Well, I go everywhere with my therapy group - like we go to lunch together, yoga, outside and shit. So it’s kind of hard to not..make friends. I’m closest to these two women, Lysandra and Elide. Selmer and Luca are both nice but they mostly hang out with Tiela, who…kind of hates me.”

“Why - do I even want to know?”

“Shut up, asshat.” Aedion laughed, and Aelin smiled too. Time to give her cousin all of the pretty little details. 

___

“How are things with Remelle?” 

Rowan shot his friend a look. Lorcan was deadlifting 500 pounds, and he gave a dark grin, his face red from exertion. 

“Fine,” Rowan gritted out. He was rowing 3,000 meters on the rowing machine, an exhausting workout. 

“Who is Remelle?” Fenrys gasped with delight. He had finished his workout and was stretching in the corner. The three men were in their usual spot at their gym that everyone knew was theirs. Even the strongest clients didn’t use their claimed spots. 

“This bitch Rowan’s sleeping with,” Lorcan informed him, doing another set of lifting. 

Rowan paused his rowing and glared at him. “That’s such a terrible thing to say, first of all. Don’t say bitch when describing a woman, please.” 

“Yeah, that’s lame, man,” Fenrys echoed, frowning. Lorcan shrugged, keeping his eyes over their heads. “Rowan, you give me the details.” 

Rowan sighed and glanced at his meter: 2,834 miles. That would have to do. He walked over to a bench, legs trembling, and collapsed. After gulping down some water, he began to fill Fenrys in. 

After he was done, Fenrys looked disturbed, not delighted like he usually was. “Rowan, my dude,” he began. “This girl sounds..not great.”

“Ah-ha! That’s what I said!” Lorcan near-shouted, grinning. He had finished his workout and was currently unloading the weights from his bar. 

Rowan pinched the bridge of his nose. Lorcan he didn’t care about, but Fenrys? The man knew how a woman’s mind worked, a skill Rowan wished he acquired himself. “Is she really that bad?” he asked weakly, hating the babish pain in his voice. 

His friends must have heard it too, as their faces softened and they sat on either side of him. “Look,” Fenrys began, then hesitated. “I know you’ve only had short flings since..”

Rowan felt his stomach empty out and a small ringing sound began screaming in his ear. He could feel his hands tremble and he squeezed them together, trying to focus on Fenrys’ words.

“...since, you know. And that’s totally fine - they were harmless. But this? This doesn’t feel good for you, for your health and your wallet.” 

Rowan looked at his friends and nodded slowly. “All right. I’ll break it off.” 

___

Me: Hey, can we talk?

Remelle: my shift isn’t over for 3 hrs can u just text? 

Me: I can wait

Me: That sounded weird I’m not going to kill you it’s just important

Remelle: k c u there babes. Kisses

Me: Uh, kisses

Remelle: old man lmao

___

It was eleven at night, and Rowan was pacing in a deserted parking lot. Not the way he wanted to spend the night, but oh well. 

He loosed a sigh of relief as he spotted Remelle strutting toward him, in her usual outfit. She giggled when she saw him, skipping up to him and pressing a kiss to his lips. “Hi muscles,” she said sweetly, batting her lashes. “What brings you here this fine evening?”

Rowan attempted a smile - but from Remelle’s expression, it was probably more of a grimace. “I wanted to talk.” 

She rolled her eyes. “Well, obvi. What’s up?”

Rowan hesitated. He fucking hated this part. “I..I don’t think this is working.”

Remelle sucked in a sharp breath and took a step back from him. He didn’t dare look up to see her expression, and he squeezed his eyes shut as he hastily continued. “I-I really do like you but I don’t think this relationship is healthy for either of us-”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Remelle interrupted. “Relationship?” She let out a laugh. “Oh my Gods, who told you that we’re in a relationship? This was nothing more than release for me.” 

Rowan felt mortification burn through him. “Yeah, yeah, I’m sorry. I just, I don’t think me giving you money is appropriate-”

“Oh my fucking Gods!” Remelle’s voice was shrill. “I’m a student! You’ve got a ton of money - honestly, that’s really shitty of you to say that. You think because you’ve given me money you own me?” 

Rowan coughed, his face burning, and he started as Remelle grabbed his face and forced him to meet her gaze. Her face was twisted with hate, and he felt his chest grow tight as her grip on his face tightened to the point of pain. “You,” she snarled, drawing her nails down his cheeks, “are such a piece of shit.”

“I-I know…I’m so sorry.” He felt nothing but shame now, shame and misery and she held him in a chokehold. At his words, she released him and he wheeled back. 

“It’s okay, Muscles. I forgive you,” she said sweetly, the beauty returning to her face. He felt relief at her words; She forgave me. It’s okay, she’s not mad anymore. 

Remelle hugged him, kissing him deeply. “C’mon. Let’s go find your car.” 

[gobbluthbutagirl]

jobs i have had in my life and what i thought of them:

Pet-sitting/house-sitting: fun. easy. Great if you’re like 15 which i was. You cannot make a living doing this

Baking commissions: fun. easy. You cannot make a living doing this

Transcription(freelance): sucked. Hated it. No not really it’s not that bad you just have to be alone in a room sitting on your ass for hours on end all night. You cannot make a living doing this

Voc rehab job training center: they went out of their way to say this is not a real job but i did get paid for it so. Sucked. Hated it. “coworkers” seemed borderline too stupid to be alive. one had a “poem” that went like “women don’t marry women, men don’t marry men, you should always marry the color of your skin” that she loved to repeat at least 10 times per day. Shut down due to covid like a month and a half in. You cannot make a living doing this but to be fair you’re not supposed to

Ingles cashier and bakery: sucked. Hated it. i interviewed for the bakery and they gave it to some other bitch instead and brought me on as a cashier. Which sucked because they only gave me like 2 days a week. 3 weeks later that other bitch had a nervous breakdown and quit and they promoted me to the bakery. woke up at 3am every day for 11 months. Had to deal with justine for 10 of those months. Corporate loves keeping the bakery understaffed on purpose. if anyone calls out you are fucked. You’re fucked. And fuck you and go straight to hell if you ever want more than 5 hours of sleep per night. You can kind of make a living doing this but one thing you absolutely cannot do is have a life

World’s Worst Target: oh boy. Sucked. Hated it. It was the time of my life. I will spend the rest of my days trying to get back what i had then. You cannot make a living doing this but you can make an existing. But the existing sucks. And you can call the hr guy an asshole to his face 5 times and he will just sit there begging you not to quit. And he’ll pay you for an hour for the 30 minutes you spent yelling at him and that will be the one and ONLY time anything you make there comes close to a living wage

Unemployed: sucks. Hate it. i’m so miserable without you it’s like having you here

[briamichellewrites]

82

Fuck cancer! Phoenix was back in rehab. He knew what to expect when he checked in. The intake process felt like it was endless! He had to answer so many questions! Finally, he had a medical examination before he was assigned a room. His room had two beds, each with a desk and two closets. He hadn’t shared a room since he and his brother were younger. His roommate was gorgeous, though. But he was not there to pick up men. He was there to stay sober.

He also knew how angry Linsey would be if he fell in love with someone else. They made vows before their friends and family to remain faithful. They introduced themselves. Brian. He would have to remember that. After unpacking, he went downstairs to wait for dinner to be served. The house had a backyard pool and gaming area with foosball and other tabletop games.

They also had miniature golf. Inside, they had a television with a DVD player, DVDs, video game consoles, controllers, and games. It also included two rooms. One was built to be an office and the other, a therapy room. The living room was used for group therapy. The dining room was big enough to accommodate twenty clients. The house kind of made him think of Bria’s. There was something so warm and inviting about it. It didn’t feel like rehab. He guessed that was the point.

He was a fish out of water because they all knew each other. It was like he was the new kid at school. During group therapy, he was asked to introduce himself. He was Dave, but his friends called him Phoenix. Which one did he prefer? It didn’t matter. He was open to both. What did he do for a living? He was a bass guitarist in a band. What band? Linkin Park.

Some of them heard of it. That made him laugh a little. He was getting help for his sobriety. How long has he been sober? He got sober in 1995 or 1996. His college roommate found him drunk more times than not. Because he didn’t know them yet, he didn’t feel comfortable talking about the abuse he suffered. Everyone likely had some kind of trauma. It caused them to drink and/or use drugs. Self-medicating. That’s what he was told it was called. The center was for anyone who was LGBT.

Men, women, or people who preferred not to identify themselves with any particular gender. He/him. She/her. They/them. She/they. He/they. They would remind them if they misgendered them accidentally. Since nobody had name tags, it would take a while for people to remember.

Bradford and Mike were helping Linsey hold down the fort. She had enough money to make it through the three months Phoenix would be gone, though the money would be tight. As a realtor, her income depended on the housing market. Phoenix was the breadwinner of the family. Mike privately brought up Bria’s offer to help out financially. The offer was open to her and Phoenix’s mother for her cancer treatments. She could decline if she didn’t feel comfortable taking the money.

She asked to think about it because it was a huge offer. Of course. He knew that she would accept whatever decision she made. She reminded him to take care of himself. He would do that. You too. She thanked him before he left her house.

“Mikey, you look like you’re about to fall asleep.”

He laughed. Was he that tired? Bria ordered him not to go anywhere until he was fully rested because she didn’t want him to get into a car accident. He thanked her for looking out for him. Woody and the dogs were in the living room while Anya took a nap on her lap. It was nice and comfortable. She purred happily, which she thought was adorable! He laughed.

When the buzzer sounded, he got up because she was unable to. Lest she disturbs the sleeping kitten. It was Brad, Matt, and Jon. He went to the front door to let them in. They introduced themselves. Bria was in her studio. When they walked in, they saw why she couldn’t come to the door. That’s adorable! They laughed. She didn’t want to wake her up. They sat down after being offered chairs. Thank you. How was she doing? She was awesome!

“I was telling Mikey that he’s not allowed to leave my house because he’s about to fall asleep.”

“I’m fine. Thanks for thinking about me”, he said with a laugh.

Jon had tried to get ahold of Phoenix but was unable to. Neither Mike nor Bria had permission to tell him where he was. He told him to call Linsey. Was he okay? He was having trouble with some things. Jon would call her then. He thanked him for respecting his privacy. What were they doing? He was working on mixing a song she had written for cancer awareness.

They were going to release it. The royalties would be donated to breast cancer research. It was an idea they had with Bradford. Could they hear it so far? Yeah. He played what he had been working on. It had the same adult contemporary ballad style as her other songs. Jon liked what they heard. Anya woke up. She stretched out her paws while yawning. Bria asked her if she had a good nap, as she scratched her head. Yes, she did! It was wonderful!

“Are you going to run around at four in the morning and meow while I’m trying to sleep?”

They laughed.

“Is that a kitten thing”, Matt asked her.

“No, it’s a cat thing. Woody does it, too. They will also scratch the door if I close it. It’s kind of unnerving when you’re not used to it. It’s like someone scratching from inside your walls.”

“Unnerving. Did you go to boarding school or finishing school”, Jon asked jokingly.

“My ancestors would be rolling over in their graves if I had to do finishing school. Unfortunately, my multiple uses of the f-word would get me expelled.”

They laughed. No, she was too rebellious for finishing school. Jon heard about her date with Brad. He admitted to having a sexual relationship with her, though it only happened a couple of times. Brad didn’t have a problem with that. Did his wife know? No, and she wasn’t going to. She loved her as her daughter. He promised to keep it a secret. Thank you.

He only wanted the best for her. Since they were friends, he knew he would treat her well. Thank you. He was going to ask her out again. It had to be perfect, though so he was trying to come up with something. Jon was convinced it wouldn’t matter to her because she would enjoy just being with him. They could do something like going to an animal sanctuary for an afternoon or going to the beach and then having dinner afterward. Don’t try too hard to impress her.

Just be yourself. The beach sounded like a good idea. He thanked him.

Bark! Bark! Meow! Anya jumped off of her lap and ran to the kitchen to join in on begging for food. They all got up and followed her. Anya went over to the humans and meowed loudly. I’m hungry! She pawed at Jon’s leg.

He looked down at her and asked her what she wanted, making them laugh. Food, human! I want food! Bria picked her up and placed her in front of her food bowl. Koi, Chateau Marmont, or Nobu? Mike suggested the Capital Grille. That sounded awesome! Neither Jon, Matt, or Brad had a problem with that. She grabbed her jacket and purse before leading them out to the garage.

@zoeykaytesmom @feelingsofaithless @alina-dixon

[westcoastrry]

Can’t Help If This Is Us

Hello friends. I’ve worked super hard on this fic. I’m not a fast writer so this took my while and I’m super happy with the way it turned out! Special thank to my bestie @harryforvogue​ . I wouldn’t know how to spell or about even write if it wasn’t for her so thanks you ugly fart face.

Also I wrote this entirely for free so all I ask is for feedback. I would really appreciate it and would love to hear your thoughts!

literally mate please let me know your thoughts. PLEASE. I beg.

WARNING: there is smut in this and mentions of the mafia.

I hope you enjoy reading Kiara and Harry’s story as much an I enjoyed writing it. 11.5k words

A fic about Kiara, a normal girl who works at a coffee shop in the upper east side of New York, where she meets Harry. A man who is caught up in a job he doesn’t want but is working hard to craft a better life for himself.

Fuck me like you wanna make love

Call me when you wanna stay in touch

Lie together just to gain trust

Say what you wanna say, can't help if this is us

Moving to New York was a fresh start for Kiara.

It’s only been a couple of months, but she has grown accustomed to the city.

She has an apartment in a not-so-great part of town, but it is close to her University, and the view from her balcony isn’t too bad. She is a coffee connoisseur, so when her pregnant friend and neighbor, Trina, helped her get a job at a cafe on the Upper East Side of Manhattan, how could Kiara truly not make the best of her newfound city life?

“An Americano please?” a deep British voice asserts.

Kiara’s cleaning off the steamer about an hour into her morning shift when the man with long chocolate curls speaks to her. Kiara has been working here for a month, and some very high profile people have come to the shop, but Kiara has never seen this man, but he sure looks important. He is in a suit, all black, and the only accessories are the multitude of rings he has on his fingers. The rose one catches her eye first, then the big gold H.S letter rings. Those are his initials? What is the point of that? Is this man obsessed with himself?

“Americano?” he says more lightly, snapping Kiara out of her thoughts.

“Sorry, I- Americano,” Kiara stutters.

Kiara isn’t one to get easily flustered, but how can she not be when this six-foot sexy man was towering over her in a suit, asking for black coffee.

Only real men drink black coffee.

She works around the machine expertly until the man’s voice interrupts her. “You’re new here?”

“Yeah,” she responds, swiping a curl off her forehead. Managing her naturally curly type four hair in the bipolar New York weather has been a challenge. Most days, she wears her thick hair in a bun, or when she can afford to get it done, box braids. “Started working here a month ago.” Kiara hands him the coffee in a brown to-go cup.

“Hmmm. I’m here all the time. I’m sure I would have noticed a new pretty employee.”

“Guess I’m not all that pretty then,” Kiara fires back, handing him a receipt with a pen to sign.

Harry doesn’t really know what to say to that because he actually does find Kiara pretty. He likes that her face is an even brown color with a few beauty marks. He likes the color of her light brown hair, and he really likes the sound of her voice. It’s sort of angelic, even when she is snapping at him.

Harry smugly hands Kiara his hefty card (the first indicator that this man has money) and signs the receipt. He drops some cash on the bill.

“That’s your tip. By the way, I do think you’re pretty.” His eyes flick down to her name tag. “Kiara.”

Kiara rolls her eyes at the man. He probably walks around life getting everything handed to him because he’s rich, white, and hot.

Screw him and his stupid cute dimple, Kiara thinks to herself. She goes to grab the receipt he signed and see’s two fifty-dollar bills stacked on each other.

Her mouth forms into an “o” shape. A hundred dollars on a three-dollar coffee? What sense does that even make? This had to be a mistake.

“Hey Kiara, are you okay?” Trina, who’s waiting tables today, asks. She has her brown apron tied over her baby bump with a few crumpled receipts and pens tucked in the pockets.

“I just got tipped a hundred dollars,” Kiara says, still shocked.

“You go, girl!” Trina enthusiastically shouts. “Who was it? A regular?”

“I’m not sure. I’ve never seen him before. Brown curly hair, dressed in a nice black suit-”

“Oh, that’s Harry,” Trina smiles. “Everyone loves Harry. He is a cutie. Been getting coffee here for a long time. He owns the strip club down the street.”

“I’m sorry. The dude owns a what?”

“A strip club bar type thing,” Trina shrugs. “Very fancy. It’s pretty much only for the elite. He is super nice. Everyone loves him here! He bought me a crib and this fancy high-tech stroller when he found out I was pregnant.”

“Yeah, well, he is kinda a dick if you ask me,” Kiara mutters under her breath.

“He tipped you a hundred dollars, and you’re calling him a dick?” Trina curiously questions.

“He called me pretty! And he had this arrogant ambiance to his voice. And what is with all the rings? It’s tacky.”

Trina places her hands on her hips.“Oh, just say you find the man hot! It’s okay to admit you find Manhattan’s most eligible and rich bachelor hot. I don’t blame you. I would get on it if I wasn’t thirty and pregnant.”

“I’m not admitting anything. Besides, I don’t have time for men. Men just cause problems.”

“Oh, you're telling me?” Trina points to her bulging belly. Kiara snorts at her friend and starts to walk away to grab more coffee beans from the storage, and Trina follows closely behind her. “You need to have some fun! Loosen up. Get your head out of that textbook. You have been living next to me for three months, and I haven’t seen you invite not one boy over! I know that vibrator you use is tired.”

Kiara grabs the box of coffee beans and turns back around to face Trina. “My vibrator is doing me just fine.”

Kiara’s whole life has been centered around academics. She was a really smart kid growing up. She had a good start to life too. However, Kiara’s wholesome childhood took a turn at twelve when her Dad died in a car accident. The accident was horrific for her entire family, but it hit her mom the worst. Her mom went from being a well respected physician's assistant, to being a drug addict, and Kiara had to grow up at the tender age of twelve just to take care of her mother. Around the age of fourteen Kiara’s mom got shipped off to rehab, and she ended up weaving in and out of foster homes until she was eighteen. Kiara realized that she never wants that to happen to her future family. She has been working hard on her academics because she hopes to have a stable income, so she can give her future kid the life that she never had.

It’s not like Kiara didn’t want to go and mingle around. Meet a new guy, have a one-nightstand, maybe even possibly fall in love. However, the dating scene as a brown skin woman in a whitewashed part of the city isn’t as easy as it sounds. Kiara doesn’t teeter the line of looking ethnically ambiguous. She is clearly a Black girl. Caramel skin, tight curls, full lips, and wide hips. Kiara likes these traits that she carries. In fact, she loves them, but men don’t. Specifically, men that aren’t her race. Not to mention that Black men are hard to come by in this particular part of city.

The simple fact is most white men don’t like Black women.

It’s even arguable that Black men don't even like Black women.

And Kiara is okay with that. She doesn’t need to be approved by a bunch of white people, nonetheless ones with penises. She just wishes she had more options to date within her race, or at least find someone who genuinely liked her.

Maybe that’s the reason why Kiara doesn’t want to go out and find a man to have some fun with. She knows he’s going to be white, and she will have to endure hundreds of questions about her race and her hair or meet racist parents, and she has done that all before.

So, for now, instead of explaining this to Trina, her very white friend, she will just blow off her questions about why she isn’t sleeping around or why she doesn’t entertain the idea of going to bars to find cute boys.

+++

The next day Kiara is off work. She spends her day sitting in her bed, in red pajama shorts and her university sweater, studying for her midterm. She got through quite a bit but is still a little worried about not getting an A. About an hour into her studying, she hears bickering from Trina’s apartment.

“I don’t know what you are being so shy about. Just ask her! You are great with girls.”

“No, I’m great at fucking girls. Trying to establish a genuine connection, I haven’t done that in a while.”

“I believe in you! Now go!”

Knock

Knock

It’s another guy that Trina has been trying to set Kiara up with. Trina does this about every other month. Very rarely does Kiara entertain the idea and sleeps with them, because she is bored, but it usually doesn’t go further than that.

Kiara opens the door to her apartment and there stands Harry. He is holding a boutique of red roses in one hand, and his other is behind his back. The suit he is wearing today is slightly different. Same silhouette, but this time the suit is brown. Kiara finally gets a good look at this man, and fuck.

Green eyes, full bright pink lips. Wide shoulders and defined biceps that show he does work out but isn’t a gym rat.

Gucci loafers. Now, this is an interesting man.

“What are you doing here?”

Harry nervously gestures to the flowers in his hand. “I brought you this.”

“You just came here to bring me flowers?”

“I also brought you this,” Harry pulls his hand from behind his back and shows a bottle of wine he got when he went on a business trip in Napa. He was saving the wine for a special occasion, like the next time he would go visit his mom, but this is more than a special occasion in Harry’s eyes. He is trying to swoon this girl.

Kiara smiles at him and grabs the wine bottle. If it’s one thing Kiara has learned in her adult life is that she loves wine. She usually only gets the cheap stuff from the liquor store down the street, but Kiara has never seen this bottle before.

She walked to her kitchen, leaving Harry staring at her dumbfoundedly. She pulled out two wine glasses from her kitchen cabinet.

Normally Kiara wouldn’t entertain this. Especially since she has a test to study for. However, she can’t lie and say she hasn’t been worked up...sexually.

“Alright, you brought me wine. You are welcomed in.”

Harry follows her inside the apartment, feeling a bit awkward. Usually, Harry never found himself at a girl’s place. He always took his one-night stands back to his house and had his assistant, Trevor escort them out in the morning.

Harry was nervous because this wasn’t a one-night stand. This was him bringing wine and flowers to a girls’ apartment, which he barely knows.

Just like Kiara, Harry also hasn’t been in the dating scene in a while. He has been busy with work, and it’s not easy what he does.

“So why did you come all this way to bring me wine?” Kiara asks Harry, pouring some wine into a glass and handing it to him. “I know you don’t live in this part of the city.”

“I don’t.” Harry sits on the barstool by the kitchen countertop. “I told you I thought you were pretty. Nice place, by the way.”

Kiara looks for the sarcasm on Harry’s face when he compliments her one-bedroom apartment but doesn’t find any. Kiara’s apartment isn’t ugly. But it probably is nothing compared to what Harry lives in.

Kiara takes a gulp of her wine. “It’s kinda trash actually. This is the ghetto.”

“You go to Columbia?” Harry asked, noticing her university sweater.

Kiara takes one more gulp of her wine, finishing off what is left in her glass. She was going to answer Harry’s question. She really was. But she got a good look at his bone structure. The way his jaw is a perfectly angled line. The way his Adam apple moves when he takes a sip of his wine. Even the way his fingers glide against the glass.

She begins to wonder how his fingers would feel against her.

“Kiara?”

That was it for Kiara because she doesn’t think she can keep herself composed in front of this beautiful rich man.

Instead of pouring her wine, Kiara grabs the bottle and starts to chug the wine like she is a trucker drinking a Samuel Adams.

Her lips remove from the bottle with a pop sound. Harry is now staring at Kiara completely taken aback by her actions. “What are you really here for, Harry? Sex? Because we can cut the small talk part.”

“Maybe I actually like you, Kiara.”

“You don’t like me.”

“Who told you that,” Harry counters.

Harry watches closely as Kiara struts towards him.

“I thought you were into blonde models?”

“Where are you finding this information from?” he questions.

“Google.”

Harry smirks. “So you’re googling me?”

“You know, if you wanted to know more about me, you could have just asked.”

Kiara cut him off with her lips attached to his. She wanted him to shut up, but she also wanted to kiss him.

Killing two birds with one stone.

Harry’s lips move in sync with hers, and he places his ringed hands on her back, pulling her closer to him.

If Kiara is being honest with herself, Harry’s lips feel like magic. It’s been a while since Kiara has kissed a guy, and she feels butterflies in the pit of her stomach.

“Kiara, what are we doing?” Harry mumbles into her mouth.

“We are gonna go back to my bedroom, and you are going to fuck me. Hard.”

“A-are are you sure about that?” Harry stutters on his words.

“We both know you didn’t come here to take me out on some date. So let’s just do this.”

Harry should have confidently responded and said, “No, Kiara, that is not why I’m here. I’m here because I actually find you attractive, and I know you have been working at the shop for about two weeks now but I have been very nervous to ask you on a date.”

However, his mouth went dry because Kiara threw off her sweater and her perky boobs sat fully on her chest.

“Kiara-”

“You know,” Kiara rests the palm of her hands on his muscular chest. Kiara has the upper hand and she sees it in the way Harry was staring at her, gaping at her actions. She loves being this bold. Upper chest bare for a man who is practically drooling over her boobs. Kiara likes to be in charge, but only for a little bit. After a while she wants to be taken care of. In bed that is. “For a man of such little words, you are talking so much right now.”

Harry grabs both of her wrist, but keeps her hands placed upon his chest. He knows his heart is racing a mile per minute. Kiara feels it and for a second she thinks to herself that there is no way she is causing this man's heart to skip beats.

Kiara stands up on her tippy toes and lets her tongue dart out to touch right below Harry’s ear suckling on the spot until it turns a nice red shade. She detaches her lips with a pop.

“You want this,” Harry whispers.

“I need this,” Kiara responds back.

“Tell me what you need Kiara.”

Harry’s right hand brushes over her bare breast, causing her to buckle a bit and stumble onto Harry’s chest.

“Hold yourself up, love, and tell me what you need.”

“I need you to fuck me,” Kiara whines.

With that, Harry holds Kiara's hips and roughly turns her away from him. Her hands went out and to grab at the granite countertop, holding herself up as much as she possibly could.

“How do you want it, hmm?” Harry whispers, quickly shrugging off his blazer and undoing a few buttons from his shirt. He begins to place wet kisses along the back of her shoulder. “I can fuck you right here, bent over the counter top. Or I can take you to the bed.”

“Here,” Kiara choked out through a moan.

“Can you handle it?” Harry teasingly asked her.

“I can handle it.”

“Can I take off your shorts?” Harry asks in a more serious tone.

“Mhmm, yes please.”

Harry shimmies down Kiara’s shorts. He takes the time to run his hands over her ass. The contact of her hot skin and Harry’s ice cold rings feels good to Kiara. She wants him to spank her, but she isn’t exactly sure what Harry is into and now she wishes she was sober enough to vocalize what she likes in bed so her needs can be met.

“Let's get a good orgasam out of you. Can I eat you?”

“Yes. God Harry, you're teasing me.”

“Not teasing,” he reassures her. “Just wanna know what you like.”

Harry gets down on his knees and opts for pushing her gray panties to the side instead of taking them off. Her core is glistening in her arousal and the smell alone makes Harry’s dick twitch in his boxers.

“Stop staring at it and-” Kiara cuts her sentence off with a yelp because Harry has attached his plump lips to her clit, giving her small kitten licks.

Kiara doesn’t really prefer to be eaten out. Most men's mouths don’t really do it for her. However, Harry is doing a very good job at keeping her legs shaking. She wants to turn around and look at him, but everytime she tries he delves deeper and deeper in her core, until she can barely hold herself up.

“M’mmm. A little higher please?”

Harry smirks against Kiara’s core because the little please she added to the end of her request tells him that she is slowly letting go of the tough exterior she puts up.

“Here? Is this good?”

“Yeah. Fuck right there please.” Kiara grips at the counter harder until her fingertips turned white.

“Been eating your veggies, huh?” Harry talks against Kiara’s core, the vibrations making her shudder. “You taste good love.”

Kiara is unable to respond because Harry is really going at it. His hands tightly grip Kiara's hips. His face is completely buried in her cunt, and he feels a slight ache in his jaw from the motions he makes with his mouth.

He continues to lick over her swollen folds, and then wraps his lips around her clit, which makes Kiara arch her back and push onto him. She is a panting mess, mouth wide open, eyes pinched together. She begins to thrash around but Harry grips even tighter at her hips.

“Stay still love.”

“I can’t,” she whined. “I’m gonna cum.”

“Why don’t you ask to cum?”

Kiara chokes on her spit slightly when Harry pulls his mouth from her pussy, and dips a finger inside of her. “Am I not entitled to an orgasm?”

“You are if you wanna be good for me.”

“Well if you're looking for a good girl I think you have come to the wrong place-”

Harry adds a second finger to her, which shuts Kiara up. “Ask nicely and you can cum.”

“I didn’t know you were gonna be so-”

“So what?” Harry asks her.

“Dominant.”

“You're lucky I’m not spanking you.”

“What's holding you back?” Kiara challenged.

Harry gets up from off his knees, and his free hand reigns down a heavy smack on her ass.

“Ask me nicely,” Harry demands, slowly pumping his fingers in and out of her.

“No.”

Smack.

“Ask nicely Kiara. I can do this all night.”

Kiara snaps her head back to look at Harry. “No.”

Smack.

Smack.

Smack.

The three spanks that Harry had given to Kiara were much harder than the first. So hard that Harry started to see an outline of his hand print.  

It's when Harry gives her one more smack and pushes his fingers deeper into her, hitting a sensitive spot that Kiara gives in.

“Fuck, Harry please just let me come,” Kiara struggles to say with a couple tears falling from her eyes from being so wrapped up in pleasure.

“Say sorry.”

“I’m sorry. So damn sorry. Please, I'm so close.”

Harry laughed at how her personality has done a complete one eighty. She went from being a complete brat to now begging him for an orgasm. “You are?”

“Yes please.”

Once Harry feels her pussy tighten around his fingers he pulls them from inside of her. “I don’t think you are that sorry.”

Kiara let out a whimper at the loss of connection. Her legs are still shaking and she almost slipped off the counter but Harry was quick to catch her.

Harry's strong arms snaked around to the front of Kiara’s stomach, letting her stumble back into her arms. She felt Harry’s hard cock press up against her raw ass.“Easy now.”

Usually, Kiara would give Harry some witty comments, but right now she is too worked up from being so close to her orgamsm. She feels a bit fuzzy, not sure what to do next. Her core aches and all she can think about is getting off.

Her hands go down to rub at her clit, but Harry quickly smacks it away.

“That's my job tonight alright? You gonna let me fuck you? You're gonna be good so I can get you off properly.”

Kiara nods her head.

“Verbal consent Kiara.”

“Yes please.”

“Good girl.”

Harry’s smug voice echoes in her ear as he places wet open mouth kisses along her neck. Harry is really enjoying himself. She felt him smile against his neck when he started to coax soft moans out of her.

Kiara weakly pushes Harry's head away from her neck.

“Doll, are you okay? Did I hurt you?”

“No, I'm good. Can we just take this to my bedroom?” Kiara politely asks. “I think I will be more comfortable there.”

When Harry gets a good look at Kiara, he can tell he has pushed past the first layer of her tough exterior. He knows there is probably much more fight and sass in her, but right now she looks vulnerable.

“Yes of course we can,” Harry held his hand out and Kiara willingly took it as he led both of them to the bedroom.

When they arrive, Kiara sits at the edge of her queen sized bed, and Harry lets go of her hand. She whines a little at the feeling of Harry’s hands slipping away from her.

Harry chuckles at the girl. “Let me just take my shirt off darling.”

Kiara watches closely as Harry’s fingers undo the buttons one by one. His silk shirt gilded easily off his toned shoulders. He made his way to sit at the top of Kiara’s bed leaning against the headboard, and Kiara crawled on her hands and knees toward him.

“Christ,” Harry mumbled under his breath.

Harry spreads his legs wider, which allows Kiara to sit comfortably in his lap. She let her hands roam up and down his tattoos starting with the birds on his collar bone. She then notices the butterfly right above his tummy. When she places her left hand on it, tracing the wings, Harry sighs contently at her touch. It’s a comforting touch, one that he has never experienced with his one-night stands.

Harry breaks a sweat on his forehead when Kiara continues to trace his tattoos. His broad chest stops moving up and down because he begins to hold his breath. He isn’t really sure what she is doing, but it feels good. Good enough for Harry to exhale and relax into the bed.

For Harry, sex with girls usually got directly to the point. Of course, there was foreplay, but not to any extent like this.

Having someone else’s hands on your body is a part of sex. However, this feels much more intimate than that. He’s got that feeling of butterflies in his stomach when Kiara begins to run her hands all over his body. It felt like he was in high school again, having sex for the first time and being so nervous because you don’t know what to do. But in this case, the nerves and butterflies don’t come from a lack of knowledge of the female anatomy. It comes from being completely enamored by the beauty this one girl holds.

And for just a second, Harry questions if he deserves this to feel the way he feels right now. Warm and a little drunk on the feeling of love. He doesn’t love Kiara, at least not yet anyway. But he feels like at this moment, Kiara cares for him. And even if she doesn’t care for him, he wouldn’t mind existing in this false reality he has created in his head for a really long time.

Something about having his body touched in such a vulnerable way is making him feel things he has never felt in his life.

“You have a lot of tattoos,” Kiara points out, fingers still tracing his butterfly tattoo.

“Yeah, I have been collecting them over the years.”

“Which one was your first one?” Kiara asks curiously.

Harry brought Kiara’s delicate hands up to the swallows on his chest.

“These ones,” Harry’s voice shakily said. Kiara takes her index finger and begins to trace the birds.

“How old were you?” Kiara asks, keeping her eyes looking at the birds.

“Sixteen,” is all Harry says, trying to keep his past where it belongs. In the past.

“That’s young. You don’t regret any of them?”

“No, actually. I think they all tell a story. Sure, some of them are stupid, but they all got some meaning behind them.

Kiara innocently brings her hand up to his cheek, cradling his face. “You gotta tell me about them one day. You have so many.”

“Mhmm,” Harry hummed in response.

“Let’s kiss some more,” Kiara suggested, wiggling her hips in Harry’s lap to find a comfortable position.

Harry nodded his head in response letting his lips touch Kiara’s, but not yet giving in to her request. His hands find their way to her lower back, and Kiara’s hands now have made their way up to his shoulders.

“You look good. You know that?” Harry says against her lips.

Kiara now has a grin on her face and blushes at Harry as if she has never received a compliment in her life.

Kiara brushes a brown curl off of Harry’s face with her index finger, “You can’t give me compliments while I’m buzzed off of wine because you might make me fall in love with you.”

Harry smiles. “Why don’t I just fuck you like I love you?”

Harry realizes what he said and awkwardly takes his hands off of Kiara’s body, nervously running his hands through his hair.

Kiara see’s the worried look on Harry’s face, but she is just a tad bit too intoxicated to process the weight of Harry’s words.

“Or you could let me fuck you,” Kiara bodly suggests. “I just haven’t done it in a while, so you might need to take over when my legs get sore.”

Harry nods, his forehead pushed upon Kiara’s. He kisses her again, and is taken by surprise when she lightly bites on his lip. She then gives a quick kiss to the corner of the month, and then his throat. She leans over to kiss his collar bones, and Harry takes the opportunity to grab a handful of her ass.

He then slowly peels her underwear off of her. He drags it slowly past her thighs looking down at her soaking wet core.

“You’re wet,” Harry mummers into her ear.

Kiara cups Harry’s dick through his boxers, and slides them off of his hips.

Harry groans in pleasure when he feels her hand touch his hard dick that is leaking pre cum.

“Don’t get too cocky now,” her hand lazily pumps at Harry's length, which she finds to be quite impressive in size.

“Kiara, don’t forget who is in charge here,” Harry grits through his teeth.

Kiara dips her head down to lick at Harry's heavy balls, she then continues her way up to his shaft until she makes her way to his tip and suctions her lips around the pink swollen flesh.

Harry looks down at the Kiara, who is giving him those innocent eyes, as if she doesn’t have his entire dick in her mouth

“Oh fuck me,” Harrys rolls his eyes, and lets his head fall onto the headboard.

“I will. But let me suck you off first.”

Kiara passes her thumb over his dick, and kisses all around the tip. She licks him up and down before taking him into her mouth entirely, making sure to make eye contact with him.

Harry places his hand gently over Kiara’s head, asking permission to touch her. She blinks at him signaling to him that it's okay.

He took a rough grip to Kiara’s brown curls, moving her head up and down in a steady rhythm.

“That's it,” he encourages as Kiara suckles on his tip. “Fucking hell.”

She pulls her mouth from Harry's length and gives him a few sharp tugs.

“Slow down,” Harry pants. “Want to be inside of you when I come. Can you handle it?”

Kiara swings one leg around Harry’s lap, her core just inches away from Harry’s throbbing dick.

“Yeah I can.”

“Well what are you waiting for?”

Kiara slowly slides down on Harry’s dick, and his hands cling to the sides of hips, coaxing her on her way down. Harry groans at how tight and snug she feels around him.

Kiara is about halfway down when the blissful feeling starts to hit her. She tightens her grip on Harry’s shoulders biting her bottom lip.

“What's wrong? Thought you said you could handle it.”

Bravely, in one push Kiara glides right down Harry’s dick.

Harry groans with pleasure as soon as she makes it all the way down. His hands go out to grip her ass, and help her bounce up and down.

“That's it. Good girl. You like it when I call you that?”

“Yes,” Kiara responds, picking up her speed so that her tits move up and down with her.

“What do you want me to call you? I can call you my good girl, a slut, or whore. Which one do you prefer?”

“A whore,” Kiara is slightly embarrassed at what this man is doing to her, but she is so wrapped up in the lust of the moment that she really couldn’t care less.

“You're my dirty little whore, hmmm?”

Harry cranes his neck down to place a kiss on her tongue, lapping his tongue over her soft skin that smells like a floral scented perfume. He moans softly into her neck and squeezes at her fleshy hips.

“Yes.”

“Say it.”

“I’m your dirty little whore,” Out of nowhere Harry thrust his hips up to meet hers. “Fuck, Harry!”

Harry placed a wet kiss behind her hair before speaking, “How about you get on your hands and knees for me. I can fuck you like that.”

“Okay,” Kiara withdraws herself from him with ease due to how wet she was. She props herself on her hands and knees and arches her back for Harry.

Harry places a hand on her lower back. He rubs the tip of his dick over her wet folds before pushing in.

Harry moves slowly at first, testing out the waters to make sure he isn’t hurting her. Her sweet moans are only egging Harry on, and he is sure he isn’t gonna last another five minutes inside of her.

“Please Harry. Fuck me faster please.”

Harry hands grips on Kiara's fleshy love handles. It is a little tight for her liking however the pain is quickly drowned out by the intense pleasure she begins to feel.

This is a dirty shag. Harry is pounding into her at such an extreme pace that Kiara can’t even get a full moan out. Her little “uhhhh’s” and “nggggs” only encourage Harry on.

Kiara’s orgasm hits her first and it's just as blissful as she thought it would be. Legs trembling, her arms are no longer propping herself up, instead her right cheek is pushed up on the bed, and a bit of salvia is foaming out of her mouth.

“I’m gonna, oh god Kiara. Just give me a sec- fuck!”

Harry’s orgasm shortly follows and it's just as euphoric for him as it was for Kiara. This was one of the most satisfying sexual encounters Harry has had in a while and he wants to enjoy every second of being buried in Kiara’s warmth.

Harry was about to pull out from her but when he looked down at where they were connecting he realized how fucked he was.

Not only did he not wear a condom, but he most definitely came inside of her.

“Fuck,” Harry mumbles under his breath.

How could he be so careless? This has never happened to him. Harry has had quite the extent of sexual partners and he makes sure to always use a condom.

He wants to blame it on the wine but he didn’t even finish his glass.

“I need a second,” Kiara tiredly whispers, panting.

“I didn’t use a condom.”

“I’m sorry?” Kiara says still coming down from her high.

Harry runs his hand through his tangled hair nervously, “I didn’t use a condom. I haven’t had sex in almost a year though. I get tested regularly too. I’m sorry it just slipped my mind. I can run out and get you some plan B.”

“It's okay,” Kiara responds. She turns her head around to look at Harry. “Do you mind pulling out now though?”

Harry looks down at his dick, and then looks up at Kiara. “Oh yeah shit uhh.” He grabs on to Kiara’s hips and slowly pulls out of her.

“I haven’t had sex in like six months by the way,” Kiara slowly turns herself around to face Harry who has now tucked himself back in his boxers. “It could be longer honestly… it's been pretty dry here until now.”

“Yeah, same. Busy with work and what not.”

There is a moment of uncomfortable silence. Kiara has the sheets up to her bare breast, and Harry is not only taking in the raw beauty of the girl in front of him, and still beyond shocked he forgot to put on a damn condom.

“Well, I can get you some plan B. I think there is like a Target down the block from your apartment.”

“No, it's fine!” Kiara responds way too quickly. “I mean like, Trina has a stash in her car. I can steal from her in the morning. You don't have to rush out if you don’t want to. It’s not safe to drive at night, and you probably have such a long way to go.”

“You want me to stay?”

“Is that a bad thing?”

Harry shakes his head. “No...errr it's not. I would really like to stay.”

“Okay well I’m gonna pee. And clean myself up. I can bring you some water?”

“Water would be great.”

Kiara nods at him, standing up so that her white sheet is wrapped tightly around her body. She knows that there is no reason to hide from Harry. He just took her from behind and called her a whore, but Harry isn’t just any man. He is a man who looks like a greek god, and fucks like one too. So Kiara couldn’t help but be a little self conscious.

Kiara quickly comes back with two glasses of water. She has even changed into an old ratty T-shirt and a fresh pair of underwear.

Kiara hands Harry a glass and he takes a sip, “You know,” she starts, crawling into bed next to him. “If you told me you fuck like that maybe I wouldn’t have put up a fight at the cafe.”

Harry blushes, setting the glass on the nightstand next to him. “Didn’t plan this, you know. Not that I mind. Trust me, I like this.”

“I would be lying if I didn’t say I thought you were cute.”

“Oh,” Harry playfulls wiggles his eyebrows, scooting himself closer to Kiara on the bed. “Please do tell me more.”

Kiara pouts at Harry until he places a kiss on her bottom lip, another sloppy wet one on her cheek. He grabs at her sides, tickling her.

“Har- Harry! Stop, please!” Kiara begins to laugh uncontrollably. She even attempts to pull Harry’s enormous hands from her body but has no luck.

“Okay, okay,” she gives up, Harry pulling his hands off of her. “It was the whole curly hair, suit thing. I love a man in a suit, and you know you got an Americano. You have good taste in coffee.”

Harry smiles. “You make good coffee.”

Kiara hums awkwardly, not making eye contact with Harry, instead opting to stare at his mermaid tattoo with abnormally large tits.

“I like your hair too,” Harry speaks up. “It frames your face nicely. It was the first thing I noticed about you.” Harry’s ringed hands make their way to the top of Kiara’s thigh, rubbing her soft skin. “Then it was all the pins you had on your apron. You have a lot.”

“Oh. Yeah I’ve been collecting them over the years.”

“You had one that said, ‘Don’t be a damn.’ What does that mean?”

“I’m not sure,” Kiara shrugs, breathing out a relaxed sigh. “It was like my third year of undergrad. I studied abroad at the University Of Edinburgh, in Scotland and this guy who had a jewelry shop said it to me. The next day I came back he just gave me the pin and told me to always keep it with me.”

Harry smiles at Kiara with adornment, “I have family in Scotland. I’m from London though. Grew up there with my mum most of my life.”

“What brought you to New York then?”

“School then work. I went to Columbia,” Harry says, giving her the shortest answer possible. “I noticed you had it on your sweater earlier…. You know before you tore it off.”

“Shut up!” Kiara groans, striking Harry’s chest. “But yes I do go to Colombia. Just for my teaching credentials. I want to teach history.”

There is a beast of silence. “Are you sure if I stay the night? I don't want to intrude-”

“I want you to stay the night.”

Harry’s heart warms because no girl has ever said that to him. The feeling of butterflies swarming around in his tummy has come back, and he knows his cheeks are heating up in embarrassment.

“Alright.” Harry pulls Kiara’s body closer to him which makes her squeal in surprise. “Only if you keep me warm for the night.

+++

Harry is awake before Kiara.

Harry is used to waking up early for his job, and usually, he would be on his way to get his morning coffee and then head on down to the club.

However, he just can't leave the girl he just fucked last night.

Her breaths are short, and he can feel her heart thumping against his chest. She was properly attached to him, and Harry really liked it. Having her this close to him.

He takes the time while Kiara was asleep to not only watch her sleep peacefully but look at all the artwork she has displayed on her walls. There are no family pictures that Harry can spot, just a picture of her and Trina on her desk. It looks like they are at some club. Trina has a drink in her hand that looks like she is about to spill and Kiara is downing a shot.

Kiara stirs a bit in her sleep and Harry watches as she slowly blinks her eyes open.

“You're warm.” She blinks. “Do you want breakfast?” Kiara offers, nuzzling herself in the crook of Harry’s neck. “I make a really good omelet.”

Harry laughs. “Kiara I really can’t keep up with you.”

Kiara begins to innocently pepper kisses all over Harry’s neck. “What do you mean?” she pouts.

Harry groans once Kiara sucks on a sensitive right beneath his jawline. “For starters, you didn’t like me at all when we first met. Then we fucked because you claimed I was here just for sex. And now you are offering to make me an omelet.”

“What are you here for then?” Kiara presses.

Harry sighs, looking down at the pretty girl all tangled up in his arms. Harry knows exactly what he wants. He is twenty-seven and he is really looking for love. A life-long partner who he can come home to after a hard day at work. A partner who makes getting up in the morning all worth it. Someone who he can take out on dates, maybe even take to meet his brother.

He wants to take a leap of faith with Kiara. He wants to ask her on a date, however, he can’t bring himself to do that. He doesn’t want to put this girl in harm’s way because he likes her.

And it's not even about Kiara getting hurt. He would never let anything physically happen to the people he cares about in his life. It’s honestly about the hurt she would experience if something happened to him.

“I-”

Harry is interrupted by Trina barging into the bedroom.

“We will be late for the train if you don't get your ass up! You always sleep in--” Trina pauses once she realizes her best friend is wrapped up in her other best friend’s arms. “Oh fuck.” Trina points back to the door. “I’ll wait outside for you.”

“Shit,” Kiara grumbles to herself. “I forgot I had work.”

Harry watches as Kiara frantically pulls her underwear up her body. When she realizes Harry is staring at her, she turns around to slide on her black lace bra.

Harry isn’t trying to be that much of a dick, staring at Kiara while she is getting changed. It's just that her ass is littered with marks from his heavy handy, and a light bruise on her loved handles from holding her securely on his lap, while he pounded into her.

The bruises were tainted with the memory of last night, and Harry notices how every little mark told the story of their rough and passionate sex. Looking back on it Harry doesn’t know if he was too rough with the young girl. He doesn’t like that it was possible that he may have hurt her.

“You need to go,” Kiara demands, pulling her jeans on, and then her white shirt.

Harry picked up his white button-up shirt off the floor and threw it over his shoulder. “Kiara, was I too rough? Maybe you should put something on the bruises--”

“I’m going to be late for work Harry,” she snaps.

“Are you mad?”

Tears well up in Kiara’s eyes and this is very unusual for her. She never cries. She is not even sure why she is crying. She pauses for a moment not answering his questions.

“I’m fine,” Kiara answers with her back still facing away from Harry.

“You’re crying, Kiara.”

“I’m not!” Kiara yelled, throwing her hands up in the air turning around. “I- I’m just a little overwhelmed.” Kiara’s breath gets caught in the back of her throat. “I have school, and I work full time, and I’m interning at this elementary school...and that…” Kiara points to the bed. “That was the best sex I have ever had, and now I look like a complete freak.” She wipes a tear with the back of her hand. “I look like a complete freak because all we did was have sex and now I’m crying. It doesn’t have much to do with you I think. I’m just a little stressed.”

That was a complete lie and Kiara knows it. At this moment, she could care less about school or the stress of work. Its that empty feeling you have after sex knowing that this isn’t a forever thing. Harry will go back to being Harry, and she will go back to being Kiara. It is simply just sex...nothing more.

Harry gets off the bed in just his unbuttoned shirt and boxers. He tests the waters by placing a comforting hand on her back. “Is there anything I can do?”

“Just show yourself out please.” Kiara walks away from Harry’s hold, grabbing a scrunchie off her desk, and her purse. “I have to go.”

Harry doesn’t stop her. He knows that if he stops her he is gonna want to kiss her. Then he is gonna convince her to come back to bed with him, and he can’t do that. For her sake.

+++

“Are we not gonna talk about it?” Trina asks while she is driving her SUV.

Trina and Kiara usually take the subway together. It works out much cheaper for the both of them, but they can’t be late for work. Not during the Monday rush. Kiara is in the passenger seat pulling up her hair and frantically covering up a few hickies on her neck from last night. Trina is driving just a little bit above the speed limit, trying to make sure they both get there on time, and also worrying about her best friend who isn’t her usual bubbly self.

“There is nothing to talk about, other than I need some plan B,” Kiara replies dryly.

“You're joking.”

“Nope. Pass me your purse.”

Trina keeps one hand on the wheel and hands Kiara her purple purse from the back seat.

“Kiara you had sex with my best friend. Unprotected sex.”

“Exactly just sex,” Kiara shruged, digging up the pill from the bottom of Trina’s bag. “And I’m your best friend!”

“You are both my best friends!” Trina argued. “You know the poor boy actually likes you right?”

Kiara rolls her eyes. “Did he tell you that?”

“Yes! Actually, he did! More than once!”

“He is lying. I’m just a normal broke student. And him? He is a fucking rich man but he looks like a literal greek god! Trina you know I googled him. His past girlfriends are models! White, skinny blonde models. I’m not white, skinny, or blonde!”

“He was a party boy in the past!” Trina retorts. “He likes you, okay? He just has trouble communicating his feelings. I know you like him too. You just have this strange idea in your head that you are not good enough for him! Which is ridiculous.”

“It's whatever,” Kiara huffs, pooping the pill in her mouth and swallowing it, “It was a hook-up. A simple one night stand.”

“It’s okay to want something more Kiara.”

“He doesn’t want something more! It's so painfully obvious,” Kiara throws her hands up in the air.

Trina knows how stubborn her best friend is. It's why they get along so well. They both have this hot headed temperament. However, Kiara never really likes to give herself time to relax. She likes to be busy but it is clearly taking a toll on her mental health.

“Let me take you out drinking after work.”

Kiara turned her head towards her friend and smiled. “Thank you. Now we are speaking my language.”

+++

While Kiara’s working, a part of her secretly wishes that Harry would show up for his americano. She is trying her hardest to convince herself that he is not worth her energy or time, but the sex is still fresh in her mind and it doesn’t help that her body is showing evidence of what took place last night.

There is still that dull satisfying ache between her legs, the sound of Harry calling her a dirty whore plays on rewind all day. She is practically daydreaming about having sex with Harry again while making coffee.

Harry was the first man to meet her needs in that manner. Sure she has cum during sex a couple times, but it wasn’t anything mindblowing. In fact her orgasms were usually underwhelming, but with Harry he knew what he was doing. His dominance was a complete turn on.

And sure Kiara could be fuck buddies with Harry. But she thinks she deserves a little more than just casual hookups. She wants a relationship because at the end of the day, she wants to build a family. A family that makes up for her broken one.

Kiara has sat down and contemplated this before. Is it inherently selfish to want to fix her childhood trauma with a family of her own, but fuck. Can you really blame her?

+++

When Kiara gets home she quickly changes into a simple black dress. It hugs her curves nicely and it's the dress she usually pulls out when she used to go clubbing with Trina (which has come to a halt because of her pregnancy).

The subway ride to the club is filled with laughter and Trina having to help Kiara actually get on and off the train (because she pregamed at the apartment).

Once they got to the club, Trina walks up to the front of the line with Kiara.

The bouncer's eyes lit up as soon as he saw Trina, “Hi Trina. Umm, should I tell Harry you are here? James is also here too. I can let him know as well.”

“Harry is here?” Kiara questions.

Trina whispers in her ear, “Yes, this is his club.”

“I’m gonna need more drinks if I have to look at his stupid face again.”

Trina playfully rolls her eyes, “Yes, you can let James and Harry know we are both here.”

The bouncer pulls out his walkie talkie and opens the door for Trina and Kiara.

Kiara supports herself on Trina’s arm as they walk into the club, “You didn’t tell me we were going to Harry’s club?”

“I know, I thought you might put up a fight about it.”

She probably would have put up a fight about it, however she wouldn’t actually mind seeing Harry's stupid, beautiful looking face again.

The club itself is beautiful. The ceilings are covered with mirrors, and hanging down from them were stunning crystal chandeliers. The chairs are red, and glass tables are placed strategically in each booth. There is also a bar with some red stools, and a huge red door near it.

“What’s back there?” Kiara asks.

“The strip club. But we don't need to go over there. C’mon you wanted some wine, didn’t you?”

Trina and Kiara made their way to the bar and a heavily tattooed girl with a name tag that says Drew is working on the opposite side of the counter mixing drinks.

“Hey, Trina! What are you doing here? You can’t drink.”

“It’s for my friend, Kiara.” Trina gestures to her Kiara, who drunkenly waves back at Drew “She will take some wine, something sweet. I’ll just have some sprite”

Drew grabs a wine glass and puts it on the table before walking away. “Coming right up”

“James is that new guy you are seeing, right?”

“Yes. He works for Harry.”

Kiara has heard Trina mention James on multiple occasions. She even thinks he has come to the cafe a couple of times for lunch, but Kiara can’t put a name to the face. She is unsure if Trina and James are dating, but she is not sure how far she should pry. She does briefly remember Trina telling her that James does not care about Trina being pregnant. In fact Trina told her one day during their thirty minute break at work that James is just happy to be a part of Trina’s family.

“Mhmm. So Harry owns this club?” Kiara asks, taking a sip from her wine that Drew provided for her.

“Yeah. He owns a few more too. I believe it's a family business or something?”

Kiara sighs before downing the rest of her wine. “Just eat the fucking rich already.”

“Kiara? Trina?”

Kiara spins around on her chair, holding up her second glass of wine that Drew had given her and made eye contact with Harry.

He looks breathtaking. Hair neatly combed out of his face, tailored suit, ring decorated fingers that Kiara thought was repulsive, but now she can't stop thinking about how they feel against her heat.

“Trina, it's Wednesday,” Harry sternly told her, pressing two fingers to the bridge of his nose, slowly breathing in and out, trying not to lose his temper at his best friend.

“Are you not happy to see me?” Kiara says, standing up. She almost trips on her heels but Harry grabs her arm.

Kiara places her hand on Harry’s cheek. “I know you have to be happy to see me. You don’t fuck someone like that unless you hate them or love them. And who could hate me?”

“Okay!” Trina chippers up, grabbing her friend and bringing her back to the barstool. “Maybe we should get some water in you, okay?”

Harry is flustered because way too much is happening at once. Harry has told Trina multiple times that Wednesdays are not a good time to show up at the club. He has his meetings on Wednesday, and dangerous people are always floating in and out of the club talking business with Harry. He just wants to keep Trina and Kiara safe.

“Drew put all their drinks on my tab,” he tells the dark-haired bartender. “Trina, did you drive here?”

“No, we took the subway,” Trina answered.

Harry sighed frustratingly. “Okay. I'll take you two home. Just don’t leave here until I come get you.”

“Harry,” Trina starts. “I'm sure we will be fine. It’s not that big of a deal. James is here anyways--”

“Trina please.”

It's the crack in Harry's voice that caused Kiara to stop drinking her wine and look up at him.

Trina shoots Harry a look of sympathy. “Okay fine. We will stay here until you're done.”

Harry exhales the air he was holding in, a nervous habit he is still trying to break. “Okay. I will be done soon.”

“What's got his panties in a twist?” Kiara snorts as Harry walks away.

“I’m not sure actually,” Trina responds. “He is always stressed at work. I’ve been trying to get him to take a break for ages, but pulling that man away from his job is an impossible task.”

“He always seems so tense.”

Trina laughs, “Yeah maybe you can help him with that.”

“Well I see you have been helping his fellow associate...James.” Kiara wiggles her eyebrows at Trina.

Trina dramatically sighs. “Don’t even get me started on him.”

“What? I thought things were going great!”

“They are!” Trina assures Kiara. “But I’m still not sure what he wants. I’m pregnant and thirty. I really don’t want to fool around anymore. I want to settle down. The baby is coming soon and I won't have time for hookups and flings. He says he doesn’t mind that I’m pregnant, but he hasn’t said he wants a relationship with me.”

“Why don’t you just be upfront with him and ask?”

“Because I don’t want to scare him off!”

“You deserve someone who is upfront with their feelings, Trina. You are never gonna know until you ask.”

Trina sticks her index finger in Kiara’s face. “I’m not doing shit until you figure out what's going on with you and Harry.”

“Fine I’ll admit. The dick is good.”

Trina squealed. “I knew it, you filthy whore!”

“I'm just a little nervous. What if he is just hooking up with me for some weird black girl fetish? What if he is a racist?”

“I can tell you that's not Harry.”

“Am I ready for this?”

Trina takes a sip of her sprite. “I dunno. You know the answer to that question, not me.”

“Well I don’t know, and you don’t know. So that's my cue to keep drinking.”

Trina rolls her eyes and is about to tell Drew that this will be Kiara’s last glass of red wine until she makes eye contact with a man walking towards them.

“Fuck,” Trina grabs her purse then grabbed Kiara’s wrist. “Don’t talk to him okay? Just don’t look at him and maybe he will go away--”

“Trina... Haven’t seen you in a while.” The man's voice is heavy and dark. When Kiara looked up at him the first thing she noticed is that he is extremely well dressed, with a bling out watch on his wrist. “Who is the lovely lady you brought with you?”

“Leave her alone Dorian.” Trina says.

“What's your name?” The man reaches out to touch Kiara’s lower back but she flinches away.

“Don't touch me! Who do you think you are?”

He raises an eyebrow at her. “Feisty. Pretty too. You are one of Harry’s girls?”

“Excuse me? One of whose girls?”

“Are you not a dancer for the club?” the man asks in a condescending town that sets Kiara off.

“Oh hell no. You know damn well I’m clearly not stripping so what is it that you want from me?”

Trina leans into Kiara’s ear. “Kiara please leave it alone,” She grabs her wrist but Kiara quickly pulls it out of her grasp. “Let's just go.”

“No, let the girl talk Trina. She has quite a mouth on her anyway. Maybe she can put it to a much better use.”

Slap

Kiara’s hand connects with Dorian’s face before Trina could stop her. Trina knows her friend has a temper but so does Dorian. The slap slightly echoes over the music and gains a few people's attention including Drew, who stops mixing her drink and keeps her eyes on Dorian, who clenches his jaw and fixes his suit on his shoulders, trying to regain his composure.

“You shouldn’t have done that,” he mutters quietly.

“And what the fuck are you gonna… Ow!” Dorian roughly grabs Kiara wrist and drags her towards him.

He holds her hand above her head. “You don’t know who you are messing with. Do I need to show you?”

“Are you out of your fucking mind?” Kiara begins to squirm. “Let go of me before I kick you in the crotch--”

“Hmmmm. Maybe I should teach you a lesson. Don’t think Harry would mind if I borrowed one of his girls.”

“Refer to me as one of Harry’s girls one more time and I will do more than just slap you.”

“Dorian. Let her go.” Kiara’s eyes float from the man holding her wrist to Harry who is stalking up to her with a man right next to him. His voice was deep and assertive. Something Kiara never thought Harry to be other than when he was in bed.

Dorian lets Kiara’s wrist go and she stumbles back a bit towards Trina.

“Harry!” Dorian loudly greets. “I was just telling one of your whores she needs to watch that mouth of hers.”

“She is not a dancer, Dorian.”

“Oh, is she not? Such a shame,” Dorians eyes shamelessly rake Kiara up and down. “With a body like that I’m sure she could attract some clients for you.”

Kiara launches at Dornian but Harry is quick to grab her this time pulling her into his chest.

“Behave. Please,” he whispers in her ear.

“Dorian, you need to go.”

“Harry, you know better than that. Came here for my money. Come here every Wednesday to get my payment.”

“Well, you're not getting it today. Come by tomorrow.”

“Funny you say that since you know the history between me and your father--”

“I don't give a fuck about the history between you and my father!” Harry seethes stepping closer to Dorian. “You don’t see him here do you? I made you a deal. You will get your money, just not tonight. You don’t get to threaten my friends and then just demand money.”

“You don’t want to test me boy--”

“No, you don't want to test me. Not tonight. Leave.”

Dorian smirks at Harry before raising his hands up in defeat. “I’ll be here tomorrow. If you don’t have my money there will be problems.”

Harry watches Dorian walk fully out the door before turning to Trina and Kiara. “Both of you. My car now.”

“What just happened?” Kiara questions.

“Trina just take her to the car.”

+++

The car ride back to Kiara’s apartment is silent. Kiara sits in the back confused as to why Trina and Harry kept whispering to each other. A whole conversation is happening and Kiara’s trying to keep up, but she can only get bits and pieces of what the two are saying.

“I might be still drunk but I can hear you know.” That is a lie.

Harry’s eyes glance up to the rear view mirror. “Are you okay Kiara? He didn’t hurt you right?”

“No but I did hurt him. Slapped him. And if you didn’t come and interrupt I was about to kick him in the balls.” Kiara hiccups at the end of her sentence.

“She is right,” Trina agrees. “She is more of a fighter than she leads on to be.”

“Exactly!” Kiara yells. “So if you would have given me the chance I would have fucked him up.”

Harry, who was clenching his hand at the wheel during the whole drive, lets go and smiles. “I believe you Kiara.”

+++

Harry makes sure to walk Trina into her apartment safely, before helping Kiara to hers which was a challenge in itself because she can’t even walk in a straight line.

“Woah,” Harry says, wrapping his strong arms around Kiara’s waist trying to keep her balance. “How about you sit down on the bed?”

Harry helps Kiara walk into her bedroom and he slowly sits her down on her bed. Her hair is completely ruined, her dress slightly bunched up at her hips and her lips gloss slightly smudged. Harry thinks she looks beautiful. He is staring a little too long before he realizes he should help her take off her heels.

He gets down on one knee and his fingers begin to work on the claps of Kiara’s heels until she wraps her leg around Harry’s neck and pulls him closer to her thigh.

“Wine makes me horny.”

“I know,” Harry pushes himself away from her, no matter how tempting she looks, and goes back to undoing her heels. “But I think it would be smart if I get you to bed.”

“Why was that guy asking you for money?”

“Asking me anything but that.”

“Okay. Did you mean it?”

Harry slides one heel off her foot and looks up at her. “Mean what?”

“When we met.” He grabs Kiara’s other foot. “You said I was pretty. You meant it?”

Harry is silent for a couple seconds, his voice low. “Of course. Why would I be lying about that?”

Kiara shrugs as Harry glides her shoe off. “Guys are assholes. Well most guys are.”

“Mhmm. Where can I find some clothes for you?”

“Top drawer.” Kiara points at her dresser right in front of her bed. Harry walks over to get some clothes and places them on the side of her bed. “When I moved here I hooked up with this one guy from my class. I thought there was something going on between us ya know? He was nice at first. So I was gonna ask him if he wanted to go on a date because well, at that point we were hooking up. Turns out he had a girlfriend.”

“Sounds like a dick. Can I unzip your dress?”

Kiara nods her head and stands up hastily, turning around so her back is facing Harry. “I feel like I’m never good enough to be the girlfriend.” Harry listens closely as he zips Kiara’s dress slowly. Her delicate skin has goosebumps on it. When he gets all the way down to the top of her butt he pushes the dress off her shoulders, and allows her to step out of it.

“I’m good enough to hook up with. But never good enough to meet the parents or keep around longer than a couple weeks.” She turns around to face Harry, and grabs the shirt he picked out for her, throwing it over her head, and ignoring the pair of sweats he brought her, opting to stay in her underwear.

“So do you find me pretty in a fuckable way? Or do you find me pretty enough to keep me around longer than a few weeks?”

“Do you want me to answer that? Because you are really drunk, and my goal isn’t to scare you off.”

“Yes please,” she hiccups. “If you want to fuck around lets just be up front about it. Think I’ve gotten my hopes up about too many guys and I just wanna know.”

“Well I always think it's time for me to settle down,” Harry explains to her. “I’m twenty seven and my mum will not stop bugging me about it.” He laughs but Kiara stays silent. “I guess dating is just a bit confusing for me.”

“Confusing?” Kiara questions, tugging at the bottom of her shirt to make sure it is covering her butt.

“I really didn’t expect to be around this long. I’ve done a lot of stupid stuff Kiara, stuff that I really shouldn’t have done because it put my life at jeopardy. I think I never settled down because I didn’t think I was able to.”

“And what about now? Do you think you can settle down.”

Harry inhales and exhales quickly. “I’m not sure.”

“Okay.” Kiara turns her back to Harry and walks to her bed. She is definitely disappointed in his answer, but she knew she shouldn’t have gotten her hopes up.

“That doesn’t mean I don’t want to keep seeing you Kiara,” Harry quickly responds, breathlessly. “I want to take you to dinner.”

“You don’t have to pity me Harry-”

“I’m not pitying you,” Harry cuts her off. “I like you Kiara. You're a nice girl, beautiful too, and I mean that. My life can be… menacing to say the least. I like you enough not to drag you into my bullshit.”

Kiara tiredly rubs her eyes with the back of her hands. “What exactly is the bullshit?”

“It's my family business and my family… Well, they are interesting people.” That is all Harry could tell her without explicitly saying, “Instead of going into finance with my business degree from Columbia, I had to join my dad’s mafia and fix all his mistakes while he lives in a mansion, even though all I have ever wanted was to have absolutely nothing to do with the “‘family business.’”

“You seem like you don’t want to talk about it.” Kiara is now sitting with her knees up to her chest on her bed and Harry is towering over her small frame.

“No. I’m not a big fan of my past. But I want to get to know you, and you can get to know me. I’m busy with work, and sometimes it's hard for me to open up, but I’d really appreciate it if we took this slow.”

Kiara pouts. “So that means I can’t convince you to stay the night? Even if I suck you off?”

Harry smiles at her. “No.” He places a kiss on her forehead. “But I will come get you tomorrow at seven for dinner. Does that work?”

“Yes it does. Thanks for bringing me home tonight.”

“Anytime. I mean that.”

Kiara flips over to her side, hands resting underneath her head. “Drive safe.”

Harry is unsure about his life. In fact he is unsure about leaping into this with Kiara. He knows they aren’t dating, and that's good for him. He needs time to figure out his life. He knows if he wants to be in Kiara’s life, he has to pay off his fathers debt’s and get out of the mafia, or else he will never truly have the life he wants.

Right now, he can see a future with Kiara. He can see himself waking up next to her, making breakfast. He can see himself enjoying a domestic life with her.

He knows he can’t have that right now. But he sure is gonna work like hell for it. For her.

[artificialqueens]

Party N’ Play (Crystal x Gigi) - Hiccup

Disclaimer: the following contains content associated with drug and sex addiction. It is not a reflection of the drug and sex addicted community as a whole, nor a depiction of the real lives of Crystal and Gigi. It is pure fiction. Thank you x

Crystal had a problem.

A serious one at that. Years had passed and the urge remained the same. An itch that had to be scratched.

She grew up with the toxic ideal that her sex was a prize, a special gift of sorts that should only be given to those who most deserved it.

But this ingrained belief didn’t stop her.

She had a successful art teaching career and quite the dependable job. A comfortable lifestyle, good family, better friends.. until she fucked her best friend’s fiancé after their rehearsal dinner, the now postponed wedding hanging in the balance.

So a friendship, or two, or three had been lost over the years. No big deal. It wasn’t entirely her fault that those particular men couldn’t keep it in their pants. And she didn’t expect for them to want to run away together. That wasn’t her intention at all.

It was an insatiable need. A deep thirst within her that she couldn’t quite quench.

This thought ran threw her brain as she locked eyes with a certain sexy, tweaking blonde who sat cross legged in comfy grey sweats across the tiled parlor room floor of Kansas City’s leading rehabilitation center.

Of course, fucking a few overly friendly boyfriends and fiancé’s wasn’t enough to land a stay at this fine establishment.

Crystal’s reasons for being there were a little more along the “court ordered” lines.

She had slept with two of the PE coaches and the head of the history department. Simple enough. She wasn’t the first to sleep around with a few coworkers.

Her fatal mistake was banging the principal under the bleachers during a school pep rally.

They had figured the band was loud enough for no one to hear them, but hadn’t accounted for the kids who had used that spot to smoke and hang out until the event was over.

Her name landed a shameful spot on Missouri’s registered sex offender’s list.

She was here to fight it. Well, as much as she could. It was a weak excuse in court, a sex addiction. Or so she believed. Her therapist, family, and whoever was left in her friend group didn’t seem to think that idea was too far fetched.

A six week stay in rehab until the smoke cleared and her name was off the offending list. It was nothing but a bump in the road for her.

A bump that wouldn’t stop her from getting what she wanted, women’s only wing of the clinic or not.

She hopped up from her perch on the social room’s couch, growing tired of pretending to watch cable tv in silence with zoned out former meth heads, and made a b line for the aforementioned sexy blonde who had since locked eyes with her from across the room.

She was careful not to draw too much attention from the nurses aids who kept a watchful eye.

“Basement in five minutes.” She said in a hushed tone over her shoulder as she kept her pace past the sitting woman, confident that she had been heard.

The footsteps that followed a few moments behind her proved it.

——-

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” Crystal cried, sinking her teeth into the woman’s shoulder.

She was currently pinned against the grimy basement wall getting finger fucked like there was no tomorrow. Her legs wrapped around the taller woman’s waist turned to jelly and shook uncontrollably.

“Shut the fuck up, they’re going to hear you.” The blonde hissed into her ear, never breaking her pace as she brought Crystal to climax.

They had done it enough times for her to know when she was close. Her eyes would roll back in her head and her screams caught in her throat. Her legs would shake even more violently before cum flooded between her thighs and coated the other woman’s fingers.

“I love it when you tell me to shut up, you fucking bitch.” Crystal bit back, finally catching her breath, “but maybe I want them to hear me.” She finished, her dark eyes burning into the cold blue ones an inch from her.

Her naked chest heaved uncontrollably against the lanky blonde who still held her against the wall. She was a lot stronger than she looked, Crystal thought to herself before the other woman released her grip and dropped her to the ground.

“Hey, what the fuck was that for?” Crystal gasped, struggling to regain her wobbly stance.

“For being a dumb ass. You want to spend more time in this hell hole for being caught fucking in a dirty basement?” The blonde scoffed in disbelief. She crossed her arms and leaned against the opposite wall of the basement, casting her eyes down and pursing her lips.

“Gigi,” Crystal laughed, “it was a joke. We’re underground. Nobody can hear us. And if anyone were close enough, we would hear them coming.” Crystal shrugged before pulling her cotton sweats back over her ass and collecting her shirt.

While dressing, she was instantly annoyed at how naked she had been and how clothed Gigi had remained during their little meet up.

She discarded her t-shirt to the side once more and sauntered over to the blonde before dropping to her knees and hooking her fingers under the waist band of her sweats, tugging them down roughly.

“Your turn.” She whispered hotly into her pussy before swiping her tongue along her folds.

Gigi’s hand shot instantly to Crystal’s hair to pull her head back, and the other gripped forcefully around her throat.

“You’re such a fucking slut.” She hissed, her tone dripped with disgust.

Crystal’s pussy flooded once again. She had never been one for dirty talk before, but Gigi had set this tone since the first time they fucked.

Their sex was forceful, dirty, and dominating. It kept Crystal crawling back for more.

The grip around her neck tightened and her eyes began to water.

“Fuck, I want to fuck you so bad.” She gasped, sliding her fingers over Gigi’s now soaked folds.

She knew how much she got to her even if she pretended she didn’t.

Without another word, Gigi forced Crystal’s mouth back to her cunt and tightened her grip as her fingers laced through her curly brown hair. She hitched a leg over her shoulder as well to give her better access.

Crystal put her all into eating her out, sucking and pulling on Gigi’s clit before inserting a few fingers and finally bringing her over the edge.

Gigi pulled her up from her knees and grabbed her face in a vice grip.

Crystal found herself hopeful for a moment that she was going to kiss her. They had never done it before, not on the lips. And for Crystal’s purposes, it wasn’t necessary. Or so she thought..

Her eyes fluttered shut in anticipation and her mouth sat agape in Gigi’s palm.

Gigi spat into it before turning Crystal’s face to the side and attacking her neck with her lips, moving her way downward to take a nipple between her teeth.

Although it wasn’t the kiss she had found herself hoping for, Crystal was exhilarated. She let out a wonton moan and bit her bottom lip, savoring the feel of Gigi’s mouth against her skin.

“Beg me to fuck you again.” Gigi moved her mouth to whisper in Crystal’s ear.

“Please fuck me.” Crystal moaned breathlessly.

“I said beg me.” Gigi hissed, tugging on Crystal’s hair.

“Fuck, Gigi! Please, I’m fucking begging you to fuck me! I’m so wet and ready for you.” She mewled urgently, locking her eyes with Gigi’s before being pushed flat on her back for round three.

[aineirisha]

What I confessed while daydreaming

Kakashi x reader

Summary: Coming back from a mission early means one thing to him, more time with you. 

A/N: I was writing some angst for Treachery and hurt myself. So I needed some fluff to balance and this happened :3 hope you like it. This is set before team 7 and you and Kakashi are not dating... yet.

He was crossing Konoha's gates at exact midday. Asuma pad on his shoulder. 

"Another great mission. Aint it, Kakashi?"

They smiled at each other. 

The black-haired left jumping on the buildings. Kakashi took a breath and looked up to the sky letting the wind caress his skin. He was finally back home. They wouldn't meet up with the Hokage to deliver the report until the evening which gave him a few hours for himself, so he decided to stop by your house. 

He could listen to your music from the gateway. Good thing you lived on the outskirts of the village and you practically had no neighbors. He knocked on your door accidentaly pushing it open. 

He glanced through it to find you dancing as you cleaned, just like that first night he spied on you, though that night you were cooking. A wide smile drew beneath his mask. You were exactly the same person. Except you weren't, not to him, not anymore. You were no longer a stranger in his eyes, to his heart. 

He walked away to leave you be. He could come back later.

"Kakashi you're back," you said, excited. And turned the volume down. 

"Hey YN-san, I didn't mean to intrude-"

"Don't worry I'm just cleaning. How did the mission go?"

He shrunk his shoulders, "Same as always."

"I'm glad you are back in one piece," you smiled as you looked into his eye. "Can I offer you something to drink?"

It took him a moment to understand what you said. Kami! he had missed your smile so much.  "Uh, sure..." 

You leaned the broom on the wall and got into the Kitchen. "Would you like to stay for lunch?" you turned to see him, "I'm cooking," you said as you wiggled your brows, "Naoki-san taught me this recipe and I decided I had to put my lack of skills to the test..."

He stayed silent, smiling.

"Can't promise it's gonna taste good but..."

"Sure, I'd love to." he finally concluded. He sat down on the couch and you started to sweep again. 

"Are you sure I'm not interrupting, YN-san?"

"Does it make you uncomfortable that I'm cleaning?" you stared at each other. "You can help me if it makes you feel less awkward," and you tossed him the broom. You turned on the volume a little and danced your way to the kitchen to keep an eye on the food. A happy feeling in the air. He stared at you. His heart was probably not beating, or maybe it was beating too fast, he couldn't tell anymore. 

"How do you do that?" he suddenly asked.

"Do what?" you glanced at him while you kept corky dancing with the ladle in your hand.

"That. Make everything feel like a celebration..."

"Oh Kakashi," you sighed, "if I didn't make my life a celebration I would've killed myself when I was seven," and awkwardly laughed. 

Your words hit him. He never, not for a second,  would've thought that someone like you could even consider taking their life away. It was like Guy not screaming around about the power of youth. It never crossed Kakashi's mind that maybe you have had a hard life. But... After all, what the hell were you doing in Konoha anyway? It was something he asked himself often. 

But he could understand. If he hadn't been so frightened to follow in his father's footsteps, he would've killed himself too a long time ago. Maybe that was why he enjoyed your company so much, maybe you had found the way that he had needed. 

It's in the little details. 

The situation was a little surreal to him. He was helping you sweep your floor while you danced, jumping on your tiptoes, singing to the ladle as if it was your mic, and you pretended to check on the food. Your voice wasn't that bad, though.

"AAAAH!" you screamed. 

"What is it?" he turned around. A small fire had lit on the stove.

"I think I burned myself," you said covering your eye with your hand. 

"Let me see," he took your hand away gently and softly placed his fingertips on your cheek to set your eye under the light. Your gazes falling on each others’. 

He was so close to you, you could hardly breathe. It would be a lie to say you didn't yearn for his touch. Your lips parted and tickled at the need of his. 

God! Why did I ask him to be my sensei?! 

You were getting tired of respecting 'The Line'.

For a fraction of a second, Kakashi's gaze fell on your lips. 

"I- I think your eye is fine, YN-san," he stuttered and let go of your hand, "Do you want help with that?" he pointed at the food. 

"Yeah..." you said in a childish voice. 

He smirked and took over the kitchen. 

"So you really can't cook, huh?"

You shrunk your shoulders and looked at him with puppy eyes. 

"So all those nights I saw you dancing in the kitchen, what were you actually doing?"

"Hhmm.. dancing?" you looked away, pouting, "I can cook ok? just... very simple things... like..." the puppy face intensifying, "...instant ramen and stuff like that," you muttered.

He chuckled. Your sweet voice had his heart melted. You were cute. Hella cute. "I'm learning, ok? I always had someone cooking for me."

"Rich family?"

You froze. You were being too chatty, "Yeah... something like that... Oh! I love this song!!" and avoided the subject. Now the broom was your mic. 

Kakashi chuckled again. 

You looked at him from the corner of your eye as you pretended to not pay much attention. He looked fucking hot cooking. God bless you! You didn't know if you'd be able to focus on anything after this. 

He seemed happy. You knew hugging him was out of the table so you increased your vibrations to reach his chakra and feel him closer. 

After a while, his hips loosened a little and started dancing with you to the rhythm of every song as he cooked. You with the broom in hand, and him with the cooking tools. 

When the food was ready he helped you set the table. 

"I didn't know you could dance," you said as you sat down. 

"Can I?" he giggled. Yeap, life with you was easier. For the past hour, the stress of the mission had abandoned him, in fact, he hadn't even remembered he was coming back from a mission. It seemed like life outside your living room didn't matter. 

"Guess what?" 

He looked into your eyes. 

"I already finished Icha Icha," you smiled proudly.

"All of them?" he asked. The fanboy in him popping out. You nodded, "And? What do you think?" 

"I liked some chapters more than others. I hate how she's portrayed as an excuse for him to surpass himself because I think she's a great character and could have sooo much potential. She's beautiful and smart, and brave, and strong... and I get the story is not about her, but sometimes she seems like an ornament, you know... I just wish female characters were not just there to make men better cause it is not our responsibility, and I know so many women in real life that feel that their ONLY purpose, the only thing they can aspire to be, is the rehab center for some troubled dude. Though I get it's pretty romantic when you meet someone that makes you wanna overcome yourself but... I dunno. It's just not women's responsibility. We are so much more than pretty faces and hot bodies...” you paused, “On the other hand... I absolutely love him. He's just so... full of hope. He never gives up, no matter what, he never stops believing that he'll get her, and he does absolutely everything he can to deserve her. And he is hilarious. Funny how romantic these porn books can be... I feel that's just how Jiraiya sees the world in general. Because Naruto, the character from the other novel, has a very similar approach to life but with much more honorable intentions," you tilted your head and raised your eyebrow. 

Naruto...

The image of your blond kid crossed your mind making you smile.

Kakashi listened to you astonished, "And you got all that from a porn book?!"  emphasizing the 'porn book' part.

You shrugged as if it was obvious. 

He was looking at you completely amused. "I always knew those books are pure art," he scratched his head smiling.

The way his eye narrowed every time he smiled left you breathless.

Lord, I'm so screwed!

"What happened to your fence, by the way?" Kakashi reminded you of the messy paintings you hadn't fixed since that day with Naruto.

"I... I... was making life a celebration?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

CH 7 (prev)    CH 9 (next)

MASTERLIST

@ren-hatake @howcanibreathewithnozaire @strawberrycakesstuff @strangerfoundmahblog @kakashishoekage @spnningtop @attsm @feelingsandemotionsnotexplored @honeypirate @keigelsss @witch-o-memes

[forestdivinity]

there’s nothing for me but the dying

You make mountains from molehills, Reginald had always been fond of telling him, you let your fear control you, instead of controlling it. You crave attention; you leave yourself deranged for want of it- The thing was, he wasn’t exactly wrong. Something inside of him was an ache, a great yawning mouth that throbbed like it was teething at all times. It was hungry and all it wanted was to feed, to consume, to fill that emptiness with the tender meat of the world around him. Maybe it was the death of small things inside of him, he was rotting in all the places people couldn’t see. All his life, Klaus had flirted with dangerous situations in an attempt to fill that void. Around him was reality, always twisting. It was a volatile thing, split across two realms. Or he was the distortion, body snapped around an emptiness, trying to exist in life and death at once. Humans weren’t meant for such things, and it terrified him. He had to choose one or the other.

And so the danger-

It was fights with his father that would end with a crack around the ear that always left his head spinning. There wasn’t pain, or there was pain, but it simply melded with the ache of his being, that rot beneath his skin. More impactful than the pain was the touch, the blood beneath Reginald’s fingers, the heat of his hand. Life. And then it was the mausoleum, the cold that seeped into his bones, the hollowness of his body mirroring the emptiness of the room; at least until it was full of spectres, visages of the undead, drawn like moths to a flame. Or one of those sparkling, electric lights, the same blue as the glow of his powers, the cracked lava lamp of his body. Some metaphor, some dream. They flocked to him, all ice and incorporeality. That was Death.

Somewhere between the two, Klaus began to know other dangers. The heat of MDMA and the cold of a comedown (life, death, repeat, start again. It was all cyclical; he was the cycle, something never ending) the touch of a body, the concrete of an alley. He flirted with men and women alike, anyone who caught his eye. Anyone who offered a bump or a hit. 

Danger successfully courted and all that.

-

“Why do you do this to yourself?” Ben moaned at him. It was a familiar complaint, barely a question at the point they were at now. 

“Don’t kid yourself into thinking I have an answer.” Klaus told him, waving his GOODBYE hand in his brother’s direction. Something in his soul ached. Maybe not his soul - did he even have one of those? Was he alive enough? Was he human enough? Maybe it was just his body that ached, that old familiar thing. Rot split open his veins, it flooded through him with every beat of his heart.

What was even the point of that thing? It worked overtime and Klaus didn’t even want it.

“You must have a reason-”

“Oh, you know darling Benny. Benerino. Ghost of my life-” people were looking at him funny now, it wasn’t an uncommon occurrence, “I’m here for a good time, not a long time and all that.”

“Don’t bullshit me, Klaus.” 

“Drop dead, Benzo. Oh, wait-” He was tetchy, somewhere between the high and the comedown. Ben had been tetchy since he’d died and realised he was stuck with the one brother he’d never been closest to.

Screw him. Screw all the ghosts. Klaus had better things to focus on, even if Ben was the only thing haunting him now, it didn’t mean he wanted to stay sober. Addictive personality, he’d been told once, no drive to help himself. Then again, that doctor had also thought him schizophrenic.

Klaus couldn’t really prove him wrong. Maybe his father had listened to the ramblings of a psychotic child and decided he must be seeing ghosts. Who knew what he should believe anymore, all Klaus wanted was the high. It was the floating that he craved, that heat that flooded his body, the freedom from the expectations of his own mind. Maybe he’d been fucked up since birth, always pushing for more, always looking for danger.

Trauma response, CPTSD, suicidal ideation, another rehab center had written on a chart after three mandatory weeks of group therapy. His fingers had itched then, even though it had been a relatively nice place. Clean, smelling faintly of antiseptic - one Allison had clearly paid for.

He’d only seen two ghosts in his time there, neither one of them screamers. They terrified him nonetheless. Klaus was always terrified: of himself, of the world, of the living and the dead. When sober he remembered his father’s hand, the sound of it cracking against his head. Ouch, what a bastard he’d been. Thinking about Reginald always made his cravings worse.  It was hard not to think about Reginald when he was sober. The man lingered in his mind like a bad smell. Klaus wanted to claw at the soft underside of his belly, imagined opening up the fragile skin there and letting all his rotten organs spill out onto the dirt. The thought gave him nightmares for weeks.  You’re making a mountain out of a molehill again, a voice echoed in his mind., somehow he couldn’t tell if it was his father’s or his own.  “I really think you can do it this time.” Ben told him on the day before they were let out of rehab. His support was nice, if obviously fake, they’d been through this dance enough times. They both knew Klaus wasn’t the type to get better.

Addictive personality. Attention seeker.

“Nah.” He said. Ben sighed, a low, haunted sound. Like a ghost! 

-

“You’re gonna kill yourself one of these days!” Diego seethes from across the hospital room, it’s a wonder the nice nurse from before hadn’t kicked him out yet. She’d been blonde, like their mother, and brought him jello with a wink like she wasn’t meant to be spoiling him.

Klaus had liked her.  

“Pish.” He waved his hands at his brother - brothers, Ben was standing there too with a frown. “Lighten up, it was only one measly overdose.” 

“Fuck you, Klaus! Your h-heart stopped, it took two minutes to revive you-” 

“Impressive timing. Down to the wire there. Gotta admire our healthcare system- oh wait.” Klaus rolled his eyes. Diego’s teeth were grit, above his scar Klaus could see the little vein on his forehead threatening to pop like bubblegum. Inside of him, something ached and snapped. The emptiness was brittle, stale, like it had been left for too long.

“I can’t keep fucking doing this.” Diego sounded angry, but that wasn’t unusual. Strangely, there was a pleading to his face, like if he gave Klaus big enough puppy dog eyes then Klaus would get down on his knees and promise to never do drugs again.

Yeah, right. 

“Then don’t, I’m not keeping you here Diego-” 

“You’re such an ass! You really don’t care about anything other than your habit-” Also untrue. Harder to say though, Klaus thought of street corners and vomit and club lights. Danger, flirted with. 

Couldn’t Diego see he was already dead, dying, dried out in the worst of ways? Existing in two places was exhausting. Sometimes all he wanted to do was sleep. 

Klaus closed his eyes. 

Danger, danger, danger, it rang like a klaxon in his head. His ears rang like someone had smacked him. He could practically hear his father’s disappointment - or maybe that was just Diego scoffing.

“Don’t contact me again unless you’re clean, Klaus. I’m not gonna sit here and watch you die.”

“Sure, whatever. I’ll see you at the funeral then, hm?” There was a crash and a stomp and a few hissed swear words. Klaus didn’t bother to open his eyes - it was easier to hide his tears that way. Not to mention he didn’t have to see Ben’s disappointed look or the otherwise empty room. 

-

Another month of rehab was ordered by the court, probably only because his daddy was rich and Klaus was still somewhat famous, despite the homelessness and the drug addiction. Childhood fame had its perks, as did the lawyer kept on standby for their family. Reginald wouldn’t rent him an apartment, but so far he’d kept Klaus out of jail - he wasn’t sure whether to be happy about that or not.

Eventually he settled on not.

It wasn’t as nice as his last one. Klaus saw a ghost with her wrists split, thought of the danger of a knife, and then thought of his brother. 

His stay got extended another month. The lack of drugs was disappointing, but the attention was fun - in the same way that bee stings and casts were fun for about five minutes until the novelty wore off. God, was he bored. 

-drive yourself deranged for want of it, echoes, echoes. Klaus thought of his father often and wished he had a drink or a pill to drown them out. At night they locked him into his room, restraints and all due to the word suicidal in his file, and he had screaming nightmares of the mausoleum, that cool, deadly place.

He needed to get out; he realised. Before, rehab had just been a pain. Something to endure between bouts of danger and death. Klaus bounced between his highs and lows and occasionally thought of killing himself in how most people thought of buying coffee when they were broke. It was hard to take the impulse seriously when he knew (had always known) that he was born halfway to his grave already.

You couldn’t kill something that was already alive.

Now, though, something had snapped. Maybe it was the loss of his brother. Maybe it was the soft leather restraints that they’d clasped around his wrists (as if he hadn’t been trained to escape cuffs when he was eight, as if he wasn’t a child soldier superhero).

“You’re okay, Klaus. You’re not there, you need to calm down-” Ben was telling him. Klaus realised he was crying - screaming again, maybe. Something was cracking, and the sound echoed around the room, like it wasn’t just inside him this time. And then he had a dull realisation that it might be his wrist. That was fine, fun even.

More danger. More pain. God, was he acquainted with it by now, the rot inside of him was going to slip out if he wasn’t careful. Klaus was going to slip out too, right out of this godawful place and out of reality too if he was lucky. He needed a hit.

He’d do just about anything for it.

Surprisingly, no-one had noticed his yelling. Then again, this rehab facility wasn’t as nice as the last one. The one before that? They had all begun to blur together, Klaus didn’t remember what number he was on now. Addictive personality, he remembered, letting your fear control you.

Fuck it, maybe they were right about him - who even cared any longer.

“Klaus, come on, don’t do this- at least get some shoes, Klaus-” Ben was talking, his voice felt very far away. Klaus removed the bars on his window without really knowing how - training had made escaping places instinctive at this point. Klaus hadn’t used the skills since he was fourteen and had gotten kidnapped on a mission but, well, it was like riding a bike! That was how the saying went, wasn’t it?

He didn’t know. He’d never leant to ride a bike.

And then he was outside in the snow, and it was still so, so cold. He realised he wasn’t wearing shoes, socks. Not even a coat. Still, he’d gotten by on worse before, hadn’t he? Another danger to dance around. Only. this time, there was no Diego to fetch him. Fine. It was fine.

-

The ghosts were somewhat easier to deal with for once, while he slowly froze under the foundations of some cracking bridge. It was winter again, like it was every year. Weirdly, Klaus always felt more alive as everything around him rotten and died. 

Well, usually he did. Now he just felt cold and exhausted and on the brink of death. Ben had convinced him to find clothes. He had a pair of boots two sizes too big and a thick fur coat on over his blue gown. Inside of his shoes, his toes curled and went numb - Klaus hoped they didn’t fall off. Sure, he was rotten inside, but he’d rather not be rotting outside too.

If he went to the hospital, they’d just send him back to rehab (or worse). 

Everything hurt from the inside out. The cold made his vision swim. Around him was the familiar stench of mildew and wet earth, like he’d been born and crafted from mud. Sure, it was probably the sludge that had once been a river, but that didn’t mean he liked it. 

Maybe it was Christmas already? Klaus hoped it was, he hadn’t been very good but hopefully Santa didn’t mind - the bastard had a few decades worth of presents to make up.

“I’ll take a bottle of vodka and a bag of cocaine, if you’re out there fat man.” He muttered, hands shoved up under his armpits. It did little to warm them up - for as long as he could remember his hands had been cold.

Poor circulation, dear, don’t forget your gloves, his mother had told him, but Klaus knew better. He was dead and rotten on the inside, and corpses didn’t get to be warm.

“I can’t believe you’re still thinking about drugs-” Ben hissed, as if he had to be quiet. It was ridiculous, Ben was a ghost, and he still insisted on whispering at times, as if anyone but Klaus could hear him.

“Drowns out the ghosties, Benny boy!” Usually, Klaus would throw his arms out to emphasise his point, but he’s a little focused on making sure his fingers don’t fall off.

Useful things, fingers.

“I’m the only one here!” Ben huffs and looks around pointedly.

“Exactly.” 

“God, you need serious help. The drugs aren’t some magic medicine, Klaus, you’re just an addict.” Ben’s voice was a sneer. It’s funny, they’d had never gotten along in life and they’re only doing a fraction better in death. 

Death, because they’re both dead. Klaus is just a bit alive too. Maybe. Some days it’s hard to tell.

He shoots a glare at Ben. It does very little. Inside him the void aches, it wants to take and take and fill itself up on anything it can get. Ben should understand that better than anyone else but Ben is dead and Ben was always too similar to him and Klaus understands, he’s always been too much-

-mountain out of a molehill the voice inside of him reminds and Klaus snaps again. 

He’s lost count of how many times he’s snapped in his life. Sometimes it feels like all he ever does is break.

“An addict who’s tired of hearing your voice!” He hisses. Ben recoils back and stomps off to the other side of the river where he sits and ignores Klaus for the rest of the night.

Well, Klaus assumes it’s the rest of the night.

He passes out after their fight and can’t remember if it was minutes or hours between the silence and the darkness. There’s a blissfulness to being unconscious, but when he wakes up the void is hungry as ever.

-

That’s the cycle, after all. He fucks up; he does something dangerous, skirts between life and death, has a fun time of it all and then fucks up again. Life, death. Living, dying. 

Klaus is an addictive personality stuck somewhere between worlds. Sometimes he wants to blame the cycle for his problems, but he thinks the addiction is just what he’s like on the inside. Nature versus nurture and all that shit.

Maybe its nature versus nature. Himself against his powers. Life against death. God, he hates the contrariness of it all; it makes him want to vomit. Klaus picks himself up, wraps his coat around himself, and wanders towards a shelter he knows gives out free clothes. 

In his body there is a beat playing out, it sings drugs drugs drugs, it sings attention seeker, it sings addict, it sings deranged with want, it sings complex post traumatic stress disorder, it sings mountains and molehills and suicidal tendencies. 

Through it all there is the ringing of a hand against his ear and the chill of old stones against his back. Klaus whistles a tune as he goes. 

Everything is absolutely fine.

[sammysdewysensitiveeyes]

@thecorteztwins 

I wound up writing a little thing based on those panels you showed me of villains “rehabilitating” (but actually being mind-controlled) at Clear Mountain Center in X-Men 92.  This was meant to be a funny story about Fabian in rehab learning how to talk to women, but it got a little disturbing because of the mind-control aspect, and also Avalanche tells a grim little story about baby murder, so warnings for that.  But now I’m really tempted to write something about Haven taking the place over and actually Doing It Right.

“So,” Fabian began, speaking in the halting tones of someone attempting to wrap his mind around a difficult concept. “You’re saying you’re not attracted to me?”

               “Not in the slightest,” said Tabitha Smith, the mutant known as Boomer (and also Time Bomb, Boom-boom, Meltdown, and whatever other code-name caught her fancy).  Her tone was firm, but she smiled at him, as if to soften the blow.  “I mean, you’re obviously good-looking, just not my type.”

               “Oh, of course, you prefer women.  I understand.  I am open-minded about such things –“

               “Nooooo…..” Boomer cut in, with some slight irritation creeping into her voice.  “I’m mostly into guys.  Just different types of guys.”  Fabian thought hard.  He was tempted to spread his legs out wider, to give her a better look at what she was rejecting, but he’d gotten enough tiny power-bombs to the crotch to learn that that was a bad idea.  (The low-powered bombs did no real damage, but they certainly stung.)

               “I get it, I get it.  You are holding yourself back.  You are maintaining a professional relationship because you are my counselor.”

               “No!”  Boomer held her head in her hands for a moment, sighing.  “Look, not every woman will find you attractive, okay?  Everyone has different preferences.  Like, people think Leonard Decaprio is super-hot, and he just doesn’t do anything for me, I’m more of a Brad Pitt girl.  It’s not something you need to feel bad about, it doesn’t mean you’re like, ugly, or anything like that.”

               Fabian’s mind whirled.  This girl was young, beautiful, a powerful mutant, and had showed him such kindness as his mentor.  She had a surprising amount of wisdom underneath her shallow and flippant demeanor.  And yet, her judgement was so unsound. Perhaps she had some kind of psychological condition, like a strange form of face-blindness?  But then, Fabian had been learning to accept many ideas that had previously seemed impossible.  The idea of living with the humans in peace.  The idea of answering hatred with understanding, not violence. The idea that he should treat others with kindness and respect, instead using them as stepping stones in his quest for status and power.

               “Very well,” Fabian began again.  It was difficult to force the words out.  “I…accept that you do not find me attractive.  I….accept that some people…..may….not find me attractive.   After all, there are many different preferences in this world.”

               “Yeah, dude, exactly.  It’s like…some people like Cool Ranch Doritos?  And some people prefer Nacho Cheese.  There’s no right or wrong, except for the people who like Funyuns, because that shit is nasty.”  Fabian wanted to roll at his eyes at her rather low class tastes, but instead he found himself laughing good-naturedly.

               “Ha, ha, yes, that is a funny joke,” he said, beaming.  It was strange.  His mind felt so….slow.  Like there was this weight pressing down in it.  But at the same time, it was oddly pleasant.  A bit like Anne Marie’s more enthusiastic hugs, which always threatened to break the recipient’s back.

               “In Spain we have jamon flavored potato chips.  Perhaps you would find them interesting to try.  I will bring some back the next time I visit home.” He did not add that he had never eaten those chips, they were junk food for peasants, but if this girl found them enjoyable, he would indulge her.  It was a nice thing to do, and he found that he wanted to be nice lately. He didn’t entirely understand why.

               “Oh dude, that would be amazing!”  Boomer exclaimed.  “I love trying junk food from other countries.  There’s so much cool stuff out there.  Did you know that they have, like, a whole ton of Kit-Kat flavors in Japan?”

                I don’t care, Fabian wanted to say.  I spent my time in Japan eating Kobe beef and blue-fin tuna, not wasting my money on cheap candy.

               “No, I didn’t know that,” he said aloud instead.  He hadn’t meant to say that.  He hadn’t intended to sound so interested, but his mouth and brain did not seem properly connected.  The pleasant feeling hung over him, almost suffocating.

               “OMG, there are like, so many!  There’s strawberry, and sweet potato, and soy sauce, and wasabi – which is like, better than you’d expect – and sake, and…”

               Fabian wanted to tell her to stop prattling, but he couldn’t quite find the words.  He looked around the outdoor area while she rambled on.  There was Blob pruning rhododendron bushes with Storm, the blossoms tiny in his huge, clumsy hands.    

               “….and blueberry cheesecake, and apple pie, and brown sugar syrup, and cantaloupe which sounds totally disgusting but apparently it’s pretty good, and…”

               The Kleinstock brothers and Frenzy were tossing a Frisbee around with Feral and Cannonball, while Vertigo and Arclight were playing scrabble with Polaris and Multiple Man.  Ruckus was strumming a guitar, pausing occasionally to sweep his hair back dramatically, and clearly looking around for an audience.  Ugh, he was singing “One Tin Soldier.”  Fabian hated that song.  Fabian hated……a lot of things that were happening at that moment.

               “….and maple, and pumpkin, and chestnut, and green tea, and Tokyo Banana, because apparently that’s a thing, and..”

               He hated listening to this stupid girl spew out every thought in her empty brain.  He hated sitting in group therapy and listening to the peons that he shared the facility with whining about their inconsequential problems.  He hated having to hug people.  He hated being stuck in this adult daycare while he should be leading his Acolytes to victory against humankind (and racking up a few kill points for the Upstarts while he was at it.)  Something in his mind was breaking free.

               “Enough!” he snapped, jumping to his feet.  “This isn’t right!  I shouldn’t be here!”  Boomer paused in her Kit-Kat flavor recital.

               “Whoa, dude.  Chill out. You need a time-out, or something? Maybe you need some time in the Angry Room.”

“No, I do not need some time in the Angry Room,” Fabian snarled.  “I don’t belong here with the  rest of these losers, there’s nothing wrong with me.  I’m….I’m so much better than the rest of you.  I’m practically a god!  I should be….should be –“  His eyebrow twitched.  His body shuddered, and a fixed grin came over his face.

               “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t be saying things like that. What am I thinking?  We’re all special in our own way.  I just want us all to be friends,” Fabian continued.  A single tear leaked out of one corner of his eye.

               “Hey, good job, man,” said Boomer, patting him on the shoulder. “You recognized a negative thought pattern, and then, like, stopped it.  That totally deserves a Hershey Kiss.”  She tossed him the silver wrapped chocolate.

               “Thank you.”  Fabian shuddered again, and then his body seemed to relax, his tense smile softening into one that seemed genuine, if a bit dazed.  “I like Hershey Kisses.”

               “Don’t we all, buddy.”

               “They are good,” Fabian continued, pulling the foil off and popping the chocolate in his mouth absent-mindedly.  “This place is a good place.  We are all good here.”

               At the table, another group was mid-way through a fairly intense game of Uno.  Most of the group (X-Men included), would have preferred poker, but apparently that wasn’t wholesome enough the rehabilitation process.

               “I’m just saying, we didn’t start the war.”  Avalanche slapped down a card, perhaps slightly too hard. “Humans want to stomp out anyone who’s different.  That’s the whole damn history of the human race.”

               “But nothing will change if we continue the cycle of violence,” argued Colossus.  

               “We must ‘turn the other cheek,’” agreed Nightcrawler. “Send out a message of peace and love.” He betrayed that sentiment by tossing down a Draw Four card.

               “Yeah, and the guy that did that got nailed to a cross, didn’t he?”  Avalanche retorted.  “Didn’t work out so well for him.”

               “You can’t be expecting us to imitate Christ, can ya?” Pyro put in, throwing a Reverse on the stack.  “He was all flawless and perfect and ‘ineffable,’ right?  And he had a get-out-of-death-free card.  We ain’t got that.”  

               “You could have that, by the Grace of God –“ Nightcrawler began, than stopped, shaking his head.  “I’m sorry, this is not the right place for that conversation.  I know religion is very personal, and everyone must make their own choices.  But I will talk about it with any of you privately, if you want.”

               “All I’m saying is, humans have tried to bloody kill us,” Pyro continued.  “Are we supposed to just lie down and take it?  I’ve had people turn on me, even back before the Brotherhood, before I committed any crimes.  People that I thought I could trust.”  The cards in his hand crumpled as his fist clenched.

               “Humans are fucking brutal.  I’ve seen…..”  Avalanche shook his head.  “There was a woman back on Kalymnos, gave birth to a baby with gills.  Nothing wrong with the kid otherwise, it was just a cute baby.  But people acted like it was the damn anti-Christ.  Her husband moved out and wouldn’t have anything to do with her. And one day….”  A slight tremor rippled across the table as he continued. “One day some guy just snatched the baby out of her arms and threw it down on the rocks.  I’ll never forget how she screamed.  And nothing ever happened to the guy.  He was a murderer, and the police did nothing.  Everyone just pretended that it never happened –“  The table shook visibly now, the vibrations spreading out into the ground around them.

               “Tovarish, please calm down.  I understand how that memory must pain you, but –“    

               The vibrations suddenly stopped.  For a moment, Avalanche looked confused, then a dull smile spread across his face.

               “I’m sorry, friends.  I just get upset sometimes, thinking about that.  I shouldn’t dwell on such horrible memories.”

               “Yes, we should just think about good things,” Pyro agreed, wearing the same sickly smile.  “We are in a good place.  We are all good here.”

               Sitting in the sun on the roof, Toad wrapped his arms around himself, smiling.  He felt….good.  For the first time that he could remember, he was entirely at peace with himself.  He wasn’t plagued with anxiety at every social interaction, waiting for the inevitable rejection, wasn’t miserable when he looked into the mirror.  No more flashbacks or sudden fits of sadness or anger.  He woke up and was actually eager to get out of bed in the morning, eager for a day that he knew would bring good things.  And people were actually being nice to him!  There was no superficial politeness or poorly hidden disgust, no cheap pity.  Just genuine kindness.  His counselors and the other former super-villains actually seemed glad to see him every day.

               Of course, sometimes it felt too good to be true. Sometimes he would look around and everything would feel slightly off, like one of those hyper-realistic dreams where you can only tell that you’re dreaming because something in your room is out of place.  He felt like he was constantly wrapped in a blanket of warm air, and it was so good and comforting, but it made him dull and sleepy.  (Perhaps this was what being drunk was supposed to be like?  For the normal people?  When Toad tried alcohol, it only seemed to make him sad.)  Things were very hazy, and it was hard to put his thoughts together.  But that didn’t matter, did it?  Because finally he was safe and happy, and everyone was so nice.

               “This is a good place,” he said aloud to no one in particular. “We are all good here.”

[let-me-love-you-loki]

Hounds of Justice--Ch. 74

Chapter 74

           Stephanie and Hunter sat at the table with Seth, Dean, Roman, and me. We were at an out-of-the-way restaurant in Portland, Oregon. It was a Monday afternoon before a show, a week before the Backlash pay-per-view.

           “It’s only fair, after everything you’ve done for me, that you know,” I said, looking over the table at Hunter. “You stuck your neck out bringing me to NXT. Steph, you brought me up to Raw and gave me the best gift that anyone ever could. You gave me these three.”

           Seth squeezed my hand, his fingers threaded through mine. I sensed the sunset sea calm that was Roman’s presence nearby. Dean was on my other side, his arm draped around my shoulders. I was enmeshed in a gold-lined aura of protection with the three of them—the steady predictability of the waves against the shore, the beautiful yet reckless energy of unbound lightning, the sense of an ever-expanding universe wrapped around an eternal center. Breathing became easier when they were close by.

           Stephanie looked at the four of us, a sad expression on her face. “I’ve told you before, it’s the best decision I ever made. You four have magic together. In and out of the ring.”

           Hunter cleared his throat, leaned forward on his elbows. His fingers interlocked. He stared at them for a long moment. “I don’t think you know how sincerely sorry I am that this happened to you, Llane. Not as a superstar, not as a member of the WWE roster. But as a person whom I care very deeply about. And I wish I could make it right, but it’s impossible to go back.”

           “You want to make it right?” Dean snarled, jamming his finger at Hunter. “Get Ronda out of that ring. She’s dangerous, she’s careless, and she’s reckless. It’s her fault that this happened to, Llane. And all due respect, boss, but you fucked up when you brought her up without one ounce of proper training. I don’t care if Piper came out of his grave and blessed her with the Blarney Stone.”

           Dean’s voice got gruffer, more impassioned with each word. I reached over and wrapped my fingers around his wrist. Eyes closed. Deep breath. The flex of tendon and muscle. A balled-up fist.

           “She could have killed Llane that night,” Roman said quietly, but firmly. “It was sheer luck that she didn’t completely snap her neck, and you know it.”

           Hunter and Stephanie looked at one another. It was Hunter who finally spoke. “We know. And we’ve spent a lot of time dealing with the fallout. It doesn’t make it any better and there aren’t any words that will make up for that failure on our parts. I know it’s a poor way of trying to make it up to you, but you should know that she is paying every penny of your medical care. Out of her own pocket.”

           Dean made a noise that clearly indicated that he didn’t care much for that idea. I held onto him a little tighter.

           “It’s far less than what she should be doing, I know,” Stephanie said gently.

           “She should be back getting her head kicked in over at UFC where she belongs,” Dean snarled.

           Sigh. A focused drawing in of the strength of the three men around me. A desperation to push back the wishes for a different life.

           “We’re not here about that. Well, not entirely. You might want to tell her to get her checkbook ready,” I replied flatly. “I’ve regained feeling in one of my legs, but the other hasn’t caught up. And the doctor doesn’t think it ever will. Not on its own at least.”

           “There’s a surgeon at the University of Michigan who has a high success rate with a surgery that might be able to restore her nerve function,” Seth said, glancing at me as he spoke. “It’s expensive and extensive. And it’ll mean she’s going to be out for a while with more rehab if it works.”

           Stephanie glanced at me, something knowing in her eyes. “Llane, you know with a surgery like that… our doctors are probably never going to clear you to compete again. Don’t do this if you’re just trying to get back in the ring.”

           Heat burned along my throat. Acid bubbled behind my eyelids. I blinked hard, willing away tears.

           “I don’t care if I never get in the ring again.” I looked from Dean to Seth, focused on the feel of their hands against my skin. I thought of Dean’s words. “I just want to be able to walk down the aisle when I get married.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

           Backstage, I watched the bank of monitors as Bayley and Sasha defended the Women’s Tag Team titles against Nia and Tamina. We’d spent most of the day before blocking the match, making sure that everyone knew their spots and calls. It was my first produced match on a pay-per-view.

           It would be my last for a very long time.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

           Seth stood in the center of the ring, his retained Intercontinental Title dangling from one hand. His hair was frizzed and fluffy, face and torso slicked with sweat. The lines of his ribs were visible as he panted to catch his breath. Elias had already rolled out of the ring, made his way up the ramp.

           A mic in his hand. Something burning in his gaze as he looked up the ramp toward the backstage area. I could almost feel the weight of his eyes all this way.

           “I want to just… no, I need to say something.” Seth paced, ran his hand over his hair to flatten the flyaway strands. He looked down at his title, dropped it to the mat like it was nothing. “All of you know what’s been going on the last six months. Llane Black has been through hell and back. We… I almost lost her. At TLC, her career was taken from her. Damnit, her life was almost taken from her.

           “From me. Us.” He stopped, looked down and took a deep breath. “Tuesday morning, Llane is going into surgery. It’s our last chance to see her back on her feet again. And I will be with her until she’s cleared. So… I won’t be able to properly defend this Intercontinental Championship. I have to—”

           Panic blurred into my veins. It seeped through like gasoline burning through everything.

           I shouted into my headset, demanded that they cut Seth’s mic.

           On the monitor, his eyes widened as he tapped hard on the mic. He walked to the edge of the ring, motioned for another.

           I looked around, desperate for some way to stop him from doing what he was about to do. I needed Roman or Dean, someone who could run out there, to make him rethink this decision that would ruin his career.

           A cameraman was nearby, one of the guys who worked with the backstage interviewers. I waved, got his attention.

           Shouted instructions to the crew in the truck. Desperation to get on that screen before Seth got a new mic and made a very big mistake.

           “Seth!” I shouted into the camera. I gripped the side of the lens in my hand. From their perspective, it might look like one of the social media style shots. I didn’t care. I was just desperate to get his attention. “Seth Rollins!”

           The scream of the crowd, muffled as it was by the curtains and the sets, let me know that they could see me on the screen. I could only imagine what Seth looked like, staring up at my face on the big screen with terror burning in my eyes.

           “Don’t you dare, Seth. Don’t you dare do what I think you’re about to.” I gasped for breath. “That title is yours. You’ve earned it. And I’ll be damned if you give it up for me. Now pick it up and get your ass back here.”

           I turned, glanced at the monitors nearby. There was a glitter in his eyes as he leaned down, took the title back into his hands, and slid out of the ring.

           No music. No chants of burn it down.

           Just my name echoing against the rafters, wrapped in well-wishes and love from the WWE Universe.

Tag List

@bethany99stuff-blog @lakamaa12 @sammyfireheartashryver @cburdine @easyobsession @xbutterflius-effectusx @0paint-the-stars0 @echrai @themumbler @bigdunneenergy @queenofthearchitect @vebner37 @reigns-rollins-ambrose @mother-forker

[bobbypizazz]

THE DEVIL'S IMPOSTORS WEAR ROBES 

SELLING FAKE TRINITY 3in1 JESUS as gods of HOMOSEXUALS

THE DEVIL, HE IS A BOLDFACED LIAR 

REDPILL  6 more days of Facebook PRISON for exposing 

TRINITY ROME 3in1 JESUS LOVER HEROINMULES4JESUS

MUSIC ROW INNER CIRCLE NATD & NSAI LEGENDS & HEROS’ COCAINE & HEROIN MULES4$JESUS

12step HERAB for SUPERSTARS TRINIT REHAB CENTERS of JONSING HEROIN & COCAIN ADDICTS 4 JESUS they practice 3IN1 PENIS WORSHIP OF HOMOSEXUALS & SEXUALS PERVERTS ARTISTS & SONGWRITERS 

ROME's Clergy TRINITY 3in1 Jesus The Church COMMITTED Treasonous rebelliousness jealousy against THE LORD GOD ALMIGHTY Rome's Scribes Sexual Perverts & Homosexuals, Knowingly Deceived Humanity who exchanged the truth of God for the lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature: And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet Leviticus 18:22 You must not lie with a man as with a woman; that is an abomination. Leviticus 20:13 If a man lies with a man as with a woman, they have both committed an abomination. And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient; ROME Clergy TRINITY LGBTQ TREASON selling 3in1 Jesus is Treasonous rebelliousness jealousy against THE LORD GOD ALMIGHTY

WAKE THE FUCK UP!

[ftwd-nicky]

Chaos at Broke Jaw Ranch | Part One

Pairings: Nick Clark x Reader, Troy Otto x Best Friend!Reader

Authors: @ftwd-nicky & @lovefilledtragedy

Words: 3446

Author’s Note: Hey everyone! So, Aud and I have decided to write a collab for both Troy and Nick since she loves Troy and I Nick. You can either read yourself as the reader or the best friend, which ever you prefer. But, this collab will literally probably be a series xD I really really hope you guys enjoy this as much we do. Also, Aud told me to say that “Troy is alive still because fuck that shit.” Thanks so much to one of my best friends, @mf-despair-queen, for proofreading this for me!

Before the apocalypse, things were much easier for Y/N and her best friend Y/B/N. Y/N and Y/B/N both had worked in a rehab center, taking care of patients suffering from addiction. Y/N was a training with the center to be a therapist and Y/B/N was a receptionist while they both were taking university courses. They both became close after talking with one another through work and had always been there for one another. When tragedy struck and destroyed much of what they knew before their eyes, they had to confide with one another more than ever before. They became attached at the hip, growing stronger and more lethal as the apocalypse raged on around them, and with both of their quick wits and their natural instincts, they had kept themselves alive for so long already. Even though the two women knew that they could survive out on their own considering everything that they had managed to go through, they had made their way to the Broke Jaw Ranch for safety and shelter, but never expected for their lives to be changed so quickly there.

 The people of the ranch had accepted Y/N and Y/B/N rather quickly, giving them a place to sleep with two other ladies, Alicia and Madison Clark. Alicia had taken quite the liking to the two girls, befriending them immediately and taking them on a tour of the ranch. As the three girls walked and talked, Alicia asked them how they were doing after a few days of being there. Nick Clark and Troy Otto had just gotten back with their team after a long few days of looking for things to scavenge.

 Troy immediately noticed the two newbies, instantly taking a liking to the shorter one with medium lengthed and curled H/C hair. His eyes roamed her body, smirking at the raggedy Star Wars t-shirt she was wearing underneath the black and red flannel, the pair of black skinny jeans and black boots. He raised his eyebrows a bit, liking what he saw as he waltzed over towards the mess tent.

 Nick had ran over to his sister, being oblivious to the two girls that she was with as he greeted her. “Hey, Alicia. Do you know if mom’s here?” He asked, glancing to his left, his eyes connecting with a bright pair of Y/C eyes. Nick tried to keep his cool as he licked his lips, his eyes analyzing everything about her. Just a few inches shorter than himself, H/C hair that stopped just around her shoulders, a black tank top that's covered with dirt and grime as a green and black flannel is tied around her waist. His eyes glanced down towards her jean-covered legs and what looked to be a pair of nice looking combat boots on her feet.

 “Nick, this is Y/N,” Alicia mentioned, pointing to the woman he was just ogling. “And her best friend, Y/B/N.”

 “Hi,” Nick mumbled, giving the two girls a small wave which they returned. Y/N’s eyes stayed on him a bit longer as she could hear Alicia mentioning something about lunch. Y/B/N noticed Y/N staring at Nick and smirked to herself as she gently slapped her friend’s arm to make her continue listening to Alicia’s comment, receiving a small glare from Y/N.

 Alicia laughed at the two of them. “Come on you two. Maybe you both can help us out in the kitchen? We will be serving lunch soon.”

 “Of course, that sounds like a great plan,” Y/B/N said, gripping the side of Y/N’s arm as she began to pull her away from Nick to continue following Alicia. “Come on now Y/N. We need to give off a good first impression to the others here, don’t we?”

 Y/N nervously coughed a bit as she glanced back up at Nick who continued to stare at her as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Yeah, sure…I, uh, I guess I will see you later Nick?”

 Nick’s eyes widened as he slightly blushed. “Um…yeah, of course. See you soon, Y/N.”

 Y/N smiled at him as Y/B/N let go of her arm and they followed Alicia to where the kitchen was located, leaving Nick alone for a split second with his thoughts. All of his attention was on Y/N as she faded off into the building with her friend and his sister. A familiar voice caught him off guard though, causing him to slightly jump.

 “Nick, come on. I need all the help I can get unloading all of this before lunch is served!” Troy shouted, waving for Nick to come over to him.

 “Coming, coming!” Nick replied, glancing back to where Y/N disappeared off to before joining Troy beside the truck to help him unload the supplies. Before he could give get a word out about the new girls, Troy beat him to the punch.

 “Those new girls here… wow. Did you see the one with the red and black flannel? I haven’t seen a girl that beautiful in a long time,” Troy said, nudging Nick’s arm with his, “Well, did you see the other one with the green and black flannel? She looks like she is what you told me that your-”

 “Type was like,” Nick said finishing Troy’s sentence, looking up at him and smiling as he continued to grab the supplies out, carrying them to where they needed to be placed.

 -

 Y/N and Y/B/N were walking a bit behind Alicia, Y/B/N starting at her best friend, a small smirk on her lips as her arms were crossed across her chest. “So, what? Not even a couple hours here and you’re already falling for someone? Who are you?” She laughed and Y/N glared down at her, shaking her head scoffing lightly.

 “I don’t know what you’re talking about. I was being friendly,” Y/N muttered and it was Y/B/N’s turn to scoff.

 “Friendly? By intently staring at him like you were undressing him with your eyes? Y/N, I’ve known you for a long time now. I think I know when you develop a crush on someone,” She muttered and Y/N looked away, her eyes catching Nick’s figure carrying supplies with Troy.

 Y/N slapped her friends arm, staring down at her with wide eyes as she could feel her cheats heat up slightly. “I-I did not. His clothes were perfectly on when I was staring at him,” She muttered, walking a bit faster.

 “Whatever you say, Y/N!” Y/B/N called after her, chuckling a bit as they walked into the kitchen area, learning how the ranchers prepare lunch. Y/N rolled her eyes at her friend and watched as Alicia grabbed the cans of beans and vegetables and gathered some of the spare chicken and beef that they had left at the ranch and showed the girls how they were going to prepare everything properly.

 -

 “Let’s go watch them, yeah?” Troy suggested as he reached for the last batch of supplies in the truck, knowing damn well that Nick was thinking the same exact thing as him, not being able to focus on anything else except the girls.

 “No, that’s creepy… don’t you think?” Nick scoffed at him.

 Troy shrugged and began to walk away from him, rubbing his calloused hands together. “Well, personally, I don’t find it all that weird, but if you’re not going to join me, have fun over here by yourself, Nicky.”

 Nick hesitated before following his friend, noticing that Troy was heading over to the second entrance to the pantry, finding them the perfect spot to watch Y/N and Y/B/N as they continued to assist with each part of the lunch. For a few minutes of watching, Nick and Troy did not expect to get caught, but their luck took a sour turn when Alicia asked Y/B/N if she could grab one last of beans for them to use, causing both Nick and Troy to both try and scramble to get out in time, but Y/B/N was too quick for the two of them.

 Y/B/N slightly jumped at the sight of the two men, also making her laugh a bit. “Well, it appears that we have two stalkers on our hands.” She looked up at the both of them and smiled. “Hello boys, nice to see you so soon again Nick. And you are?” she stated, glancing up at Troy.

 “I’m, uh...I’m Troy,” he said nervously, glancing to look at Nick for a quick second. Before he could say anything else, Y/B/N had already found what she was looking for and turned to head back out the door.

 “I’m Y/B/N. Guess you both should go and get yourselves a seat for lunch, we will be out in a second,” she said, keeping her back to them as she exited out of the pantry, returning back to the girls as if nothing had happened.

 After helping with the preparation of the lunch, the other ranchers began to all pile in and gathered at the long table together. Y/N, Y/B/N, and Alicia set out all of the food and greeted the fellow ranchers as they sat at their seats. Nick and Troy made their way to the table and sat away from one another as they watched Y/N and Y/B/N intently.

 After the three girls gave out the meals to the rest of the ranchers, they grabbed some for themselves. Y/N was looking around for a place to sit when she saw Nick alone. She smiled to herself, noticing that Alicia and Y/B/N were busy discussing the boyfriends they had before this whole thing happened, so she walked over to him, standing in front of him as he picked at his food.

 “This seat taken?” Y/N asked and Nick jumped, looking up. Once he saw her, he sat up straight, clearing his throat before shaking his head “no.”

 “Uh, no. All yours,” Nick muttered and Y/N quietly thanked him, smiling softly as she sat down across from him. “Where’s your friend?” He asked and Y/N’s smile faltered slightly, suddenly feeling like this is a bad idea as she bit her lip lightly, shrugging her shoulders.

 “I don’t know. I can go get her if you want,” Y/N muttered and Nick tilted his head to the side, noticing the change in her mood as he realized why it did.

 “Oh, no. That’s okay. Um, just you is enough for me. Plus, I think Y/B/N is a bit busy with Troy over there,” Nick chuckled and Y/N smiled at him before glancing behind her, noticing her best friend and Troy getting quite close to each other.

 She scoffed, shaking her head. “And she told me I had a crush,” Y/N mumbled quietly, hoping Nick hadn’t heard what she said. She turned back around to face Nick, suddenly not feeling very hungry anymore as she slid her plate to the side. “Do… you wanna take a walk with me?” Y/N asked and Nick’s lips parted before nodding his head.

 The pair got up, heading towards the gates as they walked in silence. Y/N’s hands were shoved in her back pockets as Nick’s were placed in his front pockets, his head facing the ground. “So, has it always been you and Y/B/N?” He asked and Y/N sighed, shaking her head.

 “Unfortunately no. Um, our boyfriends were with us but they decided to ditch us for some fucking reason,” Y/N muttered and Nick’s eyes narrowed a bit, looking a little angry.

 “They left you?” He asked, wondering if she had said that correctly and Y/N nodded her head, running one her hands through her hair.

 “Yeah. Assholes, right? Didn’t even leave us guns to defend ourselves with. We stole these from two dead military men a couple days into our journey to find people.” Nick placed one of his hands on her arm as he could see a few tears slide down her cheeks.

 “Well they certainly are assholes and if I ever find him… I’m killing him myself,” He muttered and Y/N looked towards him, a surprised look on her face as her eyes widened a bit, stopping in her tracks.

 “Oh, Nick, y-you wouldn’t do that… would you?” She asked and he turned around, noticing that he wasn’t by his side. He stepped towards her, Y/N’s heart pounding against her ribcage as he stood a few inches from her.

 “Of course I would. There is no, no reason for hi-them to do that to you guys,” Nick muttered lowly, gazing into her eyes. Y/N’s breath hitched as she could feel his breath hit her face and she pulled away a bit, looking away, her cheeks flushed a bit.

 “I-Do you provide the protectiveness to all the newcomers here?” Y/N asked, joking a bit and he licked his lips a bit, chuckling softly.

 “Actually, no. You’re the first.” Nick said bluntly and Y/N’s lips parted, a quiet ‘oh’ leaving her lips. The two began walking back towards the main area of the ranch, Y/N’s mind racing with a thousand thoughts about what had just happened.

 Once we stood in the middle of the main area, Y/N had glanced towards her left, seeing Y/B/N and Troy standing quite closely to each other, smirks on their faces and she laughed a bit. Nick furrowed his eyebrows a bit, wondering what she was laughing at as he glanced in the same direction.

 “Oh god. Well, looks like Troy found a new friend,” Nick chuckled, noticing Y/B/N walk away from him.

 “I’m gonna go see how she’s holding up so far,” Y/N mentioned and Nick sighed internally, not really wanting to be away from her just yet. “I’ll see you around?” She asked him and he nodded his head, giving her a grin. Y/N laughed lightly, smiling widely as she turned to walk away from him, but suddenly stopped. She turned back around, seeing Troy make his way towards Nick and she quickly walked back up to him, pressing a small kiss on his cheek before running over towards Y/B/N.

 -

 While Y/N and Nick were off walking around with one another, Y/B/N and Troy were sitting at the lunch table together as the ranchers came and went. Y/B/N noticed as Y/N and Nick went off with one another as she smiled to herself. Her and Troy had begun to small talk a bit and it felt nice to talk to someone new, especially someone she found so handsome. She decided to ask the questions that was burning in her mind for some time, turning herself to face Troy directly. “So, tell me Troy. Why were you and Nick watching us in the pantry earlier? Enlighten me.”

 Troy glanced at her and bit his bottom lip to hide the smirk that was appearing, “Well, if you really want to know why, we were watching you both because we find you both attractive.”

 Y/B/N laughed at his response and placed her hand on his arm. “Really? That’s very interesting. You want to know why?”

 “Enlighten me,” Troy whispered, leaning himself closer to her.

 “Because we both find you boys attractive as well.” She smiled, her bright Y/E/C eyes sparkled as Troy’s blue ones widened, his breath hitching in the back of his throat. He had barely just met her, but she was already everything he had ever needed.

 Y/B/N began to blush. She never suspected to have someone come into her life so quickly that made her feel this way since her ex left, but Troy had a way with him that pulled her in and intrigued her. She knew that she probably shouldn’t tease him at all, but she couldn’t help herself, leaning in to kiss his cheek before she stood up from the seat she had. “Maybe tonight, you and Nick can join Y/N and I by the fire pit? I noticed it earlier and I’d love to warm myself up by it.”

 “Absolutely,” Troy said, standing himself as he smiled down at her, loving the fact that he towered over her. “I will see you tonight then, Y/B/N.” All he wanted to do was hug her, but he waved and let her walk off from him instead, sighing at the fact that he won’t be able to speak to her until the evening.

 -

 Y/B/N noticed that Y/N was back, waving at her and Nick as she waited for their interaction to be over. She saw Y/N turn back to Nick, kissing him on the cheek, before running over to her. Y/B/N smiled and laughed at her friend, happy to see that Y/N and Nick had become so close already like her and Troy had earlier.

 Y/N and Y/B/N both felt that their faces burning from the blushes that covered the apples of their cheeks. Nick and Troy both disappeared into the one of the houses together, huge smiles covering their faces.

 “So?” Y/B/N questioned, trying to contain her excitement over what had just happened.

 “I, uh… I kissed his cheek, and, oh my God, he is the sweetest. He makes my heart beat so fast Y/B/N. I can hear it in my ears,” Y/N squealed, holding a hand to her chest to check and see if her heart was still beating like crazy.

 Y/B/N’s eyes widened. “Are you serious? I felt the same way with Troy, and I kissed his cheek too!”

 Y/N and Y/B/N both began to laugh and side hugged one another as they headed off to their room.

 “This is exactly why we are best friends,” Y/N smiled, patting the top of Y/B/N’s head, causing them to both smile and smirk at one another more.

 “Well, you’re going to love me even more now because I managed to set up a double date tonight with them at the fire pit we saw when we came in.” Y/B/N said as she flipped her hair from being proud of herself.

 “Oh my God...you’re joking?” Y/N questioned, watching as Y/B/N shook her head at her, “I could kiss you right now, Y/B/N, I’m serious.”

 “No need because after tonight, you will have Nick to kiss,” Y/B/N laughed as they approached their room. The two began to go through their clothes to find something else to wear for their soon to be eventful night, both looking forward to what the night would bring.

 -

 Nick shoved his hands back into his military pant pockets, walking into his place, Troy following close behind him. “So, you and Y/B/N seem to be hitting it off really well,” He smirked and Troy rolled his eyes, plopping down on the couch as Nick did the same.

 “Yeah, well I could say the same about you and Y/N,” He muttered and Nick licked his lips, nodding his head slightly.

 “Yeah, she’s certainly something else,” Nick whispered, his fingers tapping against his legs as memories had played through his mind. “Oh, so get this. Those two weren’t always alone. They had boyfriends they traveled with.” Nick told Troy and his face fell a bit, clearing his throat.

 “Well, where are they now?” Troy asked, feeling intrigued.

 “Y/N told me that they left them two for dead. Took everything, including weapons,” Nick mentioned, looking over at Troy as his jaw clenched. “Yeah, that’s how I felt too. I told her that if I ever find him, I’m killing him,” He muttered, running a hand over his hair, sighing.

 “Yeah, I’d kill him as well, but make them suffer first,” Troy muttered angrily, letting out a huff of breath. “Oh, before I forget we have a double date with them tonight at the fire pit,” He mentioned, patting Nick on the shoulder as he got up, walking towards the door.

 “Wait, what? Are you serious?” Nick asked, standing up and Troy spun around, shrugging his arms, giving him a cheeky wink before leaving Nick’s place.

[pettythieveswithpotential]

Where Do They Go?

         a glimpse at the future of the muses, when they don’t meet outside muses.

Hunter graduates from college a little earlier, goes to grad school, keeps going to grad school, eventually gets a PHD. The kid, who’s no longer a kid at this point-- although his unending optimism seems to indicate otherwise-- loves robotics. He loves them like some people love art or movies or video games. He loves them as a hobby that he turns into a career. And he revolutionizes the industry. He becomes the industry. He wins an award or two while he’s still alive. He wins several more posthumously. People talk about how he died too young. He’s 35 and his heart fails one night while he’s working late in his lab. But he always knew his heart would fail earlier than most and even death can’t banish that optimism. He’s lived a good life and he’s happy with all he accomplished before he went.

Kai and Vivian go into business together, because neither of them can handle having a boss and both of them want to do something other than steal for the rest of their lives. It’s the first thing he’s worked on in ages that he can tell his parents about and he’s so proud of it. Vivian has the artistic skill and Kai has the technical know-how. They go into animation together. It starts with a webseries, becomes a cartoon, becomes a couple of video games and keeps going. It’s just the two of them for ages, before they finally start expanding and somehow they’re in charge of a company and it’s doing well and they’re making money. They offer jobs to all of their old roommates, but none of them accept. They’re not surprised, but the offer was sincere.

Chase dies young, like his brother. Because not everyone gets a happy ending. Viv is devastated, even if the development isn’t shocking. He’s out on a hunt and things go wrong. He’s in his 40s, 41 to be exact, and at this point, he’s honestly tired, though he doesn’t know what else to do with his life. There’s no one there to help him, because he’s never been good at teamwork, and the wendigo gets the best of him. He meets his brother in the afterlife, learns he even had a brother to begin with, dislikes his parents a little more with this information. He sees Abby for the first time in nearly 25 years. She’s a little angry, but not quite what he expected. But grudges never were her thing. She’s gone after that, her soul finally able to go wherever it was meant to go. They both needed closure, apparently. He and Hunter both reincarnate, eventually, into happier families and better lives, so maybe there is a happy ending somewhere.

Dana loves cars more than some parents love their own children and she can’t imagine doing anything that doesn’t involve them. So when she’s had her fill of crime, she opens up a shop. She hires more women than men, because there aren’t enough female mechanics out in the world. She pays for it all with money she’s saved over the years, so it’s a little questionable, but Kai covers her tracks for her and she settles in happily. She loves restoring old cars. She does it in her spare time and she’s helped a few regular clients out with it. It’s not an exciting life, but it feels right and she can’t complain.

Robin sorts his shit out, which involves finding another seer who knows how to control the ability and learning from them. It takes time, but he’s willing to do it. This is all he’s ever wanted out of life. The first thing he does once he’s gained control is go to a bar, have a few drinks, and make out with a stranger, because he’s never been able to touch anyone else in his life. The second thing he does, the next day, is check into rehab. It’s rough and unpleasant, but as soon as he’s allowed visitors, his friends are there for him, and he gets clean. He goes back to school, gets a degree in history, starts teaching high school. He knew when he was a kid that this was what he wanted to do if he could ever be around people without risking his powers acting up. He never expected that day to come, but here he is and he’s amazed.

Things don’t go so smoothly for Kit. But things have never gone smoothly for Kit. His powers develop further and telepathy is hard to deal with. He can barely handle his own brain. How the fuck is he supposed to deal with everyone else’s? Answer: he isn’t. He doesn’t try to, anyway. He relapses. And it’s awful. But one of his friends is psychic and now that Robin can control it, he checks in on his friends every so often. So there’s a warehouse reunion and Kit goes to rehab and… they call Jamie. Jamie, who doesn’t believe them when they say his brother is alive. Jamie, who takes some convincing to get to the rehab center. Jamie, who cries when he sees Kit. And Kit cries when he sees Jamie for the first time in years. He almost doesn’t recognize his little brother anymore. Jamie is taller than him now. Who the fuck let that happen? Kit’s not exactly happy that Kai-- because who else could have done it?-- dug around enough to find his brother, but… he is happy to see him again. So Kit gets clean all over again and it feels even harder than it did the first time, but now he can’t fuck up for Jamie’s sake. And Jamie teaches him how to control the telepathy, because that little shit develops it first and has always handled things better than Kit ever could. He gets out of rehab and then it comes time for him to get his shit together, except that he still doesn’t want to be a functioning member of society with a 9-5 job. That sounds fucking awful. So he stays in the warehouse and it becomes a halfway house for the supernatural and Kit ends up in charge of another group of 20-somethings who are figuring life out and another after that and so on and so forth. He’s harboring fugitives, but he doesn’t care most of the time. Jamie uses his inheritance to keep the lights on and to handle expenses the residents can’t manage and it’s weird but it works. It’s good to have his brother back in his life and things are… good. He doesn’t know if they’ve ever been good before. He spends a few years waiting for the other shoe to drop, but it doesn’t. Things are good and they stay good for a long, long time.

[littlelovelymemes]

✰ * º ❛ californication sentence starters. ❜

(   WARNING: THIS IS PROBABLY NOT SAFE FOR WORK DUE TO VERY STRONG LANGUAGE AND SEXUAL CONTENT.   )

‘  i am not a fucking shrink. i don’t give a shit anyway.  ’ ‘  we are not talking! we are not fucking! nothing is happening!  ’ ‘  you know me... the talking and the fucking go hand-in-hand.  ’ ‘  rehab is for quitters.  ’ ‘  you can’t snort a line of coke off a woman’s ass and not wonder about her dreams. it’s not gentlemanly.  ’ ‘  damn you smell good, like home.  ’ ‘  spend the rest of your life with this fool and this fool will spend the rest of his life making sure you don’t regret it.  ’ ‘  there's no easy way to say this so i’ll just say it: i met someone.  ’ ‘  there’s this feeling in my gut that she may be the one.  ’ ‘  i don’t know how to be with you right now and that scares the shit out of me.  ’ ‘  it’s a big, bad world full of twists and turns and people have a way of blinking and missing the moment.  ’ ‘  i don’t know what’s going on with us and i can’t tell you why you should waste a leap of faith on the likes of me.  ’ ‘  it’s a lost art, really. like handjobs.  ’ ‘  i have a confession to make... i didn’t like you very much at first.  ’ ‘  you didn’t seem to have much interest in me, which i of course found vaguely insulting.  ’ ‘  funny how some things never change.  ’ ‘  i cruised along, doing my thing, acting the fool, not really understanding how being a parent changes you.  ’ ‘  i don’t remember the exact moment everything changed. i just know that it did.  ’ ‘  loving you has been the most profound, intense, painful experience of my life.  ’ ‘  i made a silent vow to protect you from the world, never realizing i was the one who would end up hurting you the most.  ’ ‘  when i flash forward, my heart breaks, mostly because i can’t imagine you speaking of me with any sort of pride.  ’ ‘  i care for nothing and everything at the same time.  ’ ‘  noble in thought, weak in action.  ’ ‘  i think that’s the good thing about never being married, it’s impossible to divorce.  ’ ‘  i tried, but somewhere along the line, you slip back into what you know and i’m sorry about that.  ’ ‘  i’m sorry we haven’t talked in awhile because i miss you.  ’ ‘  you’re doing the best you can. you’ve done good.  ’ ‘  that fucker is the horniest man i’ve ever met. he’ll be pitching a tent on his deathbed.  ’ ‘  don’t tell me what to feel.  ’ ‘  all my fucking life people have been telling me i do things wrong. i’m always the fucking asshole. i look around and i see everybody else is infinitely more fucked up than i am.  ’ ‘  i’m offering you sex, and you just want to talk? has the earth spun off its axis?  ’ ‘  i question everything. it’s very healthy.  ’ ‘  you should live with someone who everyday reminds you how fucking lucky you are to be with them.  ’ ‘  you don’t want to be with me.  ’ ‘  if i were to give myself to you, you would run for the hills ‘cause you’re not in love with me. you’re in love with the idea -- the idea of love.  ’ ‘  imagine my fucking disappointment when you turned out to be the biggest cliche of all.  ’ ‘  a great father is a guy that gives it all up for his family and leaves his self-destructive bullshit at the door.  ’ ‘  there isn’t a woman that i’v’e met that i haven’t fallen in love with for 10 minutes or 10 years.  ’ ‘  friends don’t let friends bang each others soulmates!  ’ ‘  i consider that whole area -- general area -- my cock. like, from my knees to nipples.  ’ ‘  two people of the opposite gender can’t rendezvous after 7 pm.  ’ ‘  life’s just too fucking boring not to try.  ’ ‘  i may be easy, but i’m not sleazy.  ’ ‘  a morning of awkwardness is far better than a night loneliness.  ’ ‘  i like it here. it’s nice. the sun is chirping, the birds are shining. the water’s wet.  ’ ‘  life is good, sweetheart. life is good.  ’ ‘  you can blame everything on the economy, douchebag.  ’ ‘  no man should ever have to bear witness to his “o” face.  ’ ‘  you know, it’s not fair to say “b.r.b.” and then never actually b.r.b.  ’ ‘  fuck around all you want. i’m no judge judy. but don’t string a woman along for a major chunk of her childbearing years. that’s not cool.  ’ ‘  when it comes to emotions, women know how to pain with the full set of oils while men are busy doodling with crayons.  ’ ‘  there’s nothing quite like getting stoned on the very bed that your ex-domestic partner shares with her fiance. it’s the little things.  ’ ‘  hang out with your wang out, but remember: no gloving, no loving.  ’ ‘  hate the game, not the playa.  ’ ‘  no matter what you did, don’t give up. do not give up because if she loves you, she’ll forgive you.  ’ ‘  things fall apart. they break. that’s life.  ’ ‘  despite all evidence to the contrary, i am a gentleman.  ’ ‘  i’ve been thinking about us -- that’s us with a capitol “u”.  ’ ‘  the story of us... how the fuck do i sum it up?  ’ ‘  any story with me in the center of it will never be anything less than a big, smiling mess.  ’ ‘  our time in the sun has been a thing of absolute beauty.  ’ ‘  for years i woke up, fucked up, said i was sorry, passed out, and did it all over again.  ’ ‘  i’m a sucker for happy endings.  ’ ‘  there’s just the two of us, which can be fucking ugly sometimes.  ’ ‘  i didn’t know how to finish it because it’s not over.  ’ ‘  it’ll never be over, as long as there’s you, and there’s me, and there’s hope, and grace.  ’ ‘  wine me. dine me. stand up 69 me.  ’ ‘  one does not very easily forget the kiss of a beautiful woman.  ’ ‘  that’s right. i said it. i meant it. i’m here to represent it.  ’ ‘  can you slow down? i don’t know why you’re so fucking angry.  ’ ‘  i’m not the one who disappeared to the bedroom with that fucking weirdo degenerate.  ’ ‘  you’ve got a fucking nerve to take issue with anything i do, ever!  ’ ‘  you’re right, but what am i supposed to do? just sit there and watch it happen?  ’ ‘  why the fuck did you come here tonight anyway?  ’ ‘  there’s always this voice in the back of my head that says ‘maybe this time it will be different, maybe this time the stars will align and there will be this magic moment between us where everything will be okay again.’  ’ ‘  there’s always something or someone in the way!  ’ ‘  you want me not to see anybody else, just say the word. but if you keep me at arms length, what am i supposed to do? just sit around with a cock-cage on and hope that you’re going to have some kind of epiphany about us?   ’ ‘  do you honestly think i care about you fucking someone else? if we’re not together, i don’t expect you to have taken some vow of celibacy.  ’ ‘  when i see someone look at you the way i used to look at you... i fucking hate that. it makes me sick to my stomach.  ’ ‘  i don’t want to be that person. i don’t want to start playing games and like, trying to get back at you or try to hurt you.   ’ ‘  i thought there was something wrong with me, but it’s you. you’re a loser.  ’ ‘  i’m sorry you got hurt. i thought we had an understanding.  ’ ‘  i swallowed your cum, but worst of all, i swallowed your bullshit.  ’ ‘  i guess being there made it easier to forget that i still love the shit out of you. yeah, wow, i said that out loud, didn’t i?  ’ ‘  so? i still love you. i always will, till the day i die. but at some point, i had to choose happiness, i had to make that a priority.  ’ ‘  i’m with someone who understands that i’ll never stop loving you and that makes me happier than i’ve ever been.  ’ ‘  contrary to popular belief, i’m not out there trying to hurt anyone.  ’ ‘  by the way, you’re an incredibly woman. very sexual. are you ovulating right now?  ’ ‘  don’t blame me because you were born with a clit for a cock and a tiny beanbag to house what passes for balls.  ’ ‘  eat my shit.  ’ ‘  it makes my labia shrivel.  ’ ‘  die young and suffer, dickless.  ’ ‘  you can either cry like a bitch or smack a bitch.  ’ ‘  what, you going back to your mommy’s? you fucking infant.  ’ ‘  sperm would enter my pretty little vajoojoo and my cold black heart would kill that shit dead, son.  ’ ‘  trust me, getting your asshole bleached would be much more fun.  ’ ‘  you’re like one of those freaky chicks who marries serial killers on death row.  ’ ‘  well, if you were not so preoccupied with sticking your dick in anything with a hole that will have you, you might noticed these things.  ’ ‘  i want to go back and do it all over again. only this time, not make the same mistakes... this time, do it better. this time do it right.  ’ ‘  our best days are behind us now. you’re just chasing a dragon. we’re never going to life happily ever after.  ’ ‘  you’re going to die poor, drunk, and alone.  ’ ‘  welcome to the place where time stands still, where whisky flows and always will.  ’ ‘  i came back... for you. i know it’s overwhelming, disorienting even.  ’ ‘  we have to resolve this shit one way or another, don’t you agree?  ’ ‘  i say we stay here until we figure it out... or until we both get so fucking horny we can’t stand it. either way, it’s a win-win for both of us.  ’ ‘  what is this? explain yourself, woman.  ’ ‘  do you realize that the bottom has just officially dropped out of our relationship?  ’ ‘  angry? i’m not angry! why would i be angry? i’m not even entitled to angry.  ’ ‘  that’s what makes it worse: she was there first.  ’ ‘  you might wanna curve your crazy bitch.  ’ ‘  why, do you still love her?  ’ ‘  are you challenging me right here in my own home?  ’ ‘  of course i love you! i’ve always loved you!  ’ ‘  i didn’t fuck anyone, if that’s what you were wondering.  ’ ‘  who gives diamonds to the homeless? not i.  ’ ‘  i love you and i want to spend the rest of my life annoying the shit out of you.  ’ ‘  i’m sick and tired of fighting about the past.  ’ ‘  home is wherever you are.  ’ ‘  you are so full of shit?  ’ ‘  other than making the sweet love to me, that’s the nicest thing you could’v done.  ’ ‘  you’re right, i know everything there is to know about you.  ’ ‘  i am lucky. i’m lucky to have known you, i’m lucky to have loved you.  ’ ‘  i like you when you’re crazy.  ’ ‘  you have so much shit going on in your life right now, you don’t want to add this to the mix.  ’ ‘  thank you for letting me be the crazy one for once.  ’ ‘  merry fucking christmas. can we go home already?  ’ ‘  it’s your life. if there’s something you don’t like about it, you can change it.  ’ ‘  you need to be in the middle of a mess of your own creation, right? that’s what makes you attractive and also, impossible to live with.  ’ ‘  impossible is a very strong word.  ’ ‘  i love you, but i can’t be with you. when will you accept that?  ’