#wow- we really are just like the Victorians

[protect-namine]

when I think I can't love albedo kreideprinz genshin impact even more, I remember that he wears stockings and I just love him even more for that

[andmaybegayer]

What are some of the coolest computer chips ever, in your opinion?

Hmm. There are a lot of chips, and a lot of different things you could call a Computer Chip. Here's a few that come to mind as "interesting" or "important", or, if I can figure out what that means, "cool".

If your favourite chip is not on here honestly it probably deserves to be and I either forgot or I classified it more under "general IC's" instead of "computer chips" (e.g. 555, LM, 4000, 7000 series chips, those last three each capable of filling a book on their own). The 6502 is not here because I do not know much about the 6502, I was neither an Apple nor a BBC Micro type of kid. I am also not 70 years old so as much as I love the DEC Alphas, I have never so much as breathed on one.

Disclaimer for writing this mostly out of my head and/or ass at one in the morning, do not use any of this as a source in an argument without checking.

Intel 3101

So I mean, obvious shout, the Intel 3101, a 64-bit chip from 1969, and Intel's first ever product. You may look at that, and go, "wow, 64-bit computing in 1969? That's really early" and I will laugh heartily and say no, that's not 64-bit computing, that is 64 bits of SRAM memory.

This one is cool because it's cute. Look at that. This thing was completely hand-designed by engineers drawing the shapes of transistor gates on sheets of overhead transparency and exposing pieces of crudely spun silicon to light in a """"cleanroom"""" that would cause most modern fab equipment to swoon like a delicate Victorian lady. Semiconductor manufacturing was maturing at this point but a fab still had more in common with a darkroom for film development than with the mega expensive building sized machines we use today.

As that link above notes, these things were really rough and tumble, and designs were being updated on the scale of weeks as Intel learned, well, how to make chips at an industrial scale. They weren't the first company to do this, in the 60's you could run a chip fab out of a sufficiently well sealed garage, but they were busy building the background that would lead to the next sixty years.

Lisp Chips

This is a family of utterly bullshit prototype processors that failed to be born in the whirlwind days of AI research in the 70's and 80's.

Lisps, a very old but exceedingly clever family of functional programming languages, were the language of choice for AI research at the time. Lisp compilers and interpreters had all sorts of tricks for compiling Lisp down to instructions, and also the hardware was frequently being built by the AI researchers themselves with explicit aims to run Lisp better.

The illogical conclusion of this was attempts to implement Lisp right in silicon, no translation layer.

Yeah, that is Sussman himself on this paper.

These never left labs, there have since been dozens of abortive attempts to make Lisp Chips happen because the idea is so extremely attractive to a certain kind of programmer, the most recent big one being a pile of weird designd aimed to run OpenGenera. I bet you there are no less than four members of r/lisp who have bought an Icestick FPGA in the past year with the explicit goal of writing their own Lisp Chip. It will fail, because this is a terrible idea, but damn if it isn't cool.

There were many more chips that bridged this gap, stuff designed by or for Symbolics (like the Ivory series of chips or the 3600) to go into their Lisp machines that exploited the up and coming fields of microcode optimization to improve Lisp performance, but sadly there are no known working true Lisp Chips in the wild.

Zilog Z80

Perhaps the most important chip that ever just kinda hung out. The Z80 was almost, almost the basis of The Future. The Z80 is bizzare. It is a software compatible clone of the Intel 8080, which is to say that it has the same instructions implemented in a completely different way.

This is, a strange choice, but it was the right one somehow because through the 80's and 90's practically every single piece of technology made in Japan contained at least one, maybe two Z80's even if there was no readily apparent reason why it should have one (or two). I will defer to Cathode Ray Dude here: What follows is a joke, but only barely

The Z80 is the basis of the MSX, the IBM PC of Japan, which was produced through a system of hardware and software licensing to third party manufacturers by Microsoft of Japan which was exactly as confusing as it sounds. The result is that the Z80, originally intended for embedded applications, ended up forming the basis of an entire alternate branch of the PC family tree.

It is important to note that the Z80 is boring. It is a normal-ass chip but it just so happens that it ended up being the focal point of like a dozen different industries all looking for a cheap, easy to program chip they could shove into Appliances.

Effectively everything that happened to the Intel 8080 happened to the Z80 and then some. Black market clones, reverse engineered Soviet compatibles, licensed second party manufacturers, hundreds of semi-compatible bastard half-sisters made by anyone with a fab, used in everything from toys to industrial machinery, still persisting to this day as an embedded processor that is probably powering something near you quietly and without much fuss. If you have one of those old TI-86 calculators, that's a Z80. Oh also a horrible hybrid Z80/8080 from Sharp powered the original Game Boy.

I was going to try and find a picture of a Z80 by just searching for it and look at this mess! There's so many of these things.

I mean the C/PM computers. The ZX Spectrum, I almost forgot that one! I can keep making this list go! So many bits of the Tech Explosion of the 80's and 90's are powered by the Z80. I was not joking when I said that you sometimes found more than one Z80 in a single computer because you might use one Z80 to run the computer and another Z80 to run a specialty peripheral like a video toaster or music synthesizer. Everyone imaginable has had their hand on the Z80 ball at some point in time or another. Z80 based devices probably launched several dozen hardware companies that persist to this day and I have no idea which ones because there were so goddamn many.

The Z80 eventually got super efficient due to process shrinks so it turns up in weird laptops and handhelds! Zilog and the Z80 persist to this day like some kind of crocodile beast, you can go to RS components and buy a brand new piece of Z80 silicon clocked at 20MHz. There's probably a couple in a car somewhere near you.

Pentium (P6 microarchitecture)

Yeah I am going to bring up the Hackers chip. The Pentium P6 series is currently remembered for being the chip that Acidburn geeks out over in Hackers (1995) instead of making out with her boyfriend, but it is actually noteworthy IMO for being one of the first mainstream chips to start pulling serious tricks on the system running it.

The P6 microarchitecture comes out swinging with like four or five tricks to get around the numerous problems with x86 and deploys them all at once. It has superscalar pipelining, it has a RISC microcode, it has branch prediction, it has a bunch of zany mathematical optimizations, none of these are new per se but this is the first time you're really seeing them all at once on a chip that was going into PC's.

Without these improvements it's possible Intel would have been beaten out by one of its competitors, maybe Power or SPARC or whatever you call the thing that runs on the Motorola 68k. Hell even MIPS could have beaten the ageing cancerous mistake that was x86. But by discovering the power of lying to the computer, Intel managed to speed up x86 by implementing it in a sensible instruction set in the background, allowing them to do all the same clever pipelining and optimization that was happening with RISC without having to give up their stranglehold on the desktop market. Without the P5 we live in a very, very different world from a computer hardware perspective.

From this falls many of the bizzare microcode execution bugs that plague modern computers, because when you're doing your optimization on the fly in chip with a second, smaller unix hidden inside your processor eventually you're not going to be cryptographically secure.

RISC is very clearly better for, most things. You can find papers stating this as far back as the 70's, when they start doing pipelining for the first time and are like "you know pipelining is a lot easier if you have a few small instructions instead of ten thousand massive ones.

x86 only persists to this day because Intel cemented their lead and they happened to use x86. True RISC cuts out the middleman of hyperoptimizing microcode on the chip, but if you can't do that because you've girlbossed too close to the sun as Intel had in the late 80's you have to do something.

The Future

This gets us to like the year 2000. I have more chips I find interesting or cool, although from here it's mostly microcontrollers in part because from here it gets pretty monotonous because Intel basically wins for a while. I might pick that up later. Also if this post gets any longer it'll be annoying to scroll past. Here is a sample from a post I have in my drafts since May:

I have some notes on the weirdo PowerPC stuff that shows up here it's mostly interesting because of where it goes, not what it is. A lot of it ends up in games consoles. Some of it goes into mainframes. There is some of it in space. Really got around, PowerPC did.

[utilitycaster]

In the end, it is misogyny but in the form of that Imogen (and most of the female cast, if we are being fair) gets reduced to just being a woman to the point that criticizing any real flaw, wrong doing, or "hey i personally maybe perhaps don't like that she did this" is turned into an attack on her because she is a woman, because after all, all women are perfect and so so dainty they must be protected (sarcasm)

Without mentioning the attacking real women in the name of the fictional one

It really is the "God forbid a woman do anything" but in it's worst form

Sorry for venting, been having thoughts about the fandom for the past 5 years

YUP. I do recommend Unlikeable Female Characters by Anna Bogutskaya which I devoured in like, one sitting over my winter break and posted a bunch of excerpts from but this discourse is extremely not limited to the CR fandom. I mean, think about all of the endlessly churning nonsense about the women of Gone Girl and Midsommar. I am going to see Love Lies Bleeding tomorrow and have steered well clear of really any discussion because I simply would like to see buff lesbians in a crime drama but apparently the discourse is rancid.

Of course there are people who assume ill of female characters while excusing men. That is absolutely a big problem. But again, we can barely talk about that. I recently made a post about how Laura is not a particularly chaotic player, and indeed is one of the most cautious players in actual play, and again I think there is a serious and important conversation to be had about how there's probably a reason why, say, Travis and Taliesin are more likely to make extremely bold moves, because they didn't get raked over the coals during C1 for stealing a cool broom from a guest character! I actually think Marisha has managed to hang on to some of her boldness and it makes her a stronger player but I would not have been surprised if she retreated after the hate she got from Keyleth. But yeah, in actual play, bold moves are pretty important. We can't even talk about how real-world misogyny holds back the actual actors without some moronic wretch being like "FIGURES THAT A MISOGYNIST CUNT LIKE YOU LIKES A MALE ACTOR."

When a character who is a man - or in some cases, characters who are not men but are played by men - does something people don't like we can say "wow, I didn't like this, but it was an interesting choice by the actor!" but we aren't allowed to either talk about the reasons why a real world woman might hesitate to play a character who does ugly things - because of the misogynistic backlash that will land specifically on her as a real person - nor can we compliment her for going for it and playing a complex flawed character, because how DARE you say a woman is anything less than some kind of Divine Feminine ideal. At best you're allowed a two-dimensional caricature of She's So Sweet And Good But Sometimes Gets Angry (this also happened to my friend Keyleth).

And this might reveal my own biases but like. I as a woman don't love being called self-centered, but that, personally, would probably lead me to some reflection. If you call me a girlfailure, even jokingly, I am going to break your nose. It's really telling that like...one of the absolute no-brainer "hey stop calling grown women girls" feminist tenets has gone by the wayside particularly with the set of people who think that meta that fails to put women on so high a pedestal they are untouchable is misogynist. They are awful towards women, fictional and real.

A line that always stuck with me from, bizarrely, a book about wordplay, was that Victorian men would treat women of their same classes as their superiors, but never their equals - they would coddle them and protect them but they wouldn't actually engage with their thoughts and foibles. (This happened to my friend Jester).

Anyway my personal solution is to keep going. On some level, as my previous post indicates, while I don't want the harassment it also only underscores my point, that a lot of these people are way more invested in being a dick to women on the internet than writing meta about the pretend women they think they like. I have to imagine they're doing this because either think they're entitled to meta they like from people who can actually fucking write it because god knows most of the people making this complaint have the most "if you can't dazzle them with brillance, blind them with the most purple-prose bullshit you can muster" attitude; or because they literally are just champing at the bit to attack women online with the ostensible veneer of "but it's FEMINIST to call THESE women cunts because they said my blorbo wasn't saintly and flawless." However, again, I know that I'm pretty bullheaded and forcibly unlearned the uh, patriarchal idea that women should not be confrontational. I do not blame people who look at this whole situation and say "I'm going to keep my thoughts to myself because this is so unpleasant."

[beanghostprincess]

Trans buggy is my lifeblood and I am SO HAPPY YOU LOVE HER TOO and I'm feral I'm shaking the bars of my cage FUCK I LOVE WOMEN

Like. Yes. Absolutely, Shanks and Buggy have little bits and pieces of ALL their parents, specifically Ray and Roger but No Adult Was Safe From Their Assimilated Found Family, Alright?

Shanks does this one movement when he's showing off and being SILLY about it that he picked up from Oden. Buggy uses chopsticks more easily than forks and spoons, which is mind boggling to those who know her and how clutzy she is.

Crocus was the KING of unexpected and frankly terrifying threats, something Buggy learned like a damned religion. Shanks got his penchant for Gay Uncle On Holiday clothes and patterns from him.

A lot of Shanks' attacks and swordplay was taught to him by Roger and Rayleigh, so his style is a mix of their own with a TWIST that's all him. Buggy wasn't as interested in swordsmanship, but she certainly isn't a novice at it. The forms and katas to her are meditative, and she can't really sit still for normal meditation ((AuDHD Buggy my beloved)) so THIS is her way of grounding. Her knife fighting is also derived from Ray's style, with quick, devasting blow that focus more on backlash damage, Haki and agility.

Buggy and Shanks both have Roger's grin, and when Rayleigh sees them, grown and side by side and beaming and greeting him so warmly, part of him breaks and heals and splinters and oozes love. He of course will not show weakness and instead teases them, as is his love language.

Also consider Cross Guild adopting the Seraphims. Stuff's normal at first until they give the kids some children's books. Cue "what is a dad? What is a mom?" questions. The adults answer them, and the kids simply nod before wandering off again.

Then, a few hours later, Buggy feels a tiny hand tug-tug at her pants. It's two little dark haired tykes, big saffron and violet eyes staring up at her. She blinks. "What's up, munchkins?"

"Mother, we want a snack and fathers are busy."

"Oh. Yeah, sure thing, sweeties, let me ju- WAITWHAT-?!"

Shanks is frothing, seething, crying in the window like a Victorian woman betrayed when he gets word that Buggy and the other two have "sons". He then proposes they have a baby too, to be fair.

Then the kids call him uncle or father twice removed and he is suddenly living his best life wdym he's gonna be the BEST uncle ever, hey kids wanna go harass people-?

Buggy is BEYOND flustered but she's also.... really flattered? Shanks wants a baby? With HER?? Like a real, whole ass baby. Wow. And she already has two sons! Maybe. Her little Birdie seems a tad unphased by the concept of gender anyway, so she won't push. She has two kids. And Shanks wants a third. Wow. Wow~ ♡

And then Crocodile has to go and ruin it by suggesting the kids stay with "auntie Al" for the weekend, while the guys see if they can get that baby idea rolling~

Buggy proceeds to blush so hard she's STEAMING and promptly faints.

I FUCKING LOVE WOMEN TOO!!!!!!!!!!! SCREAMING THIS EVERYWHERE I GO!!!!!!!!!

Both of them having traits of all their parents and role models and keeping them with them forever,, When Rayleigh sees them again he's so fond of their little gestures and :(( He loves them so so much.

Also, the whole thing about Cross Guild adopting the Seraphims is just so so cute. And them calling Buggy 'mom'??????? Crying and sobbing, idk. Cute family that is not dysfunctional but pretty much not normal my beloved.

Honestly, Buggy as a mom just feels so right. But especially as an adoptive mom, you know? She just keeps seeing outcasts and understanding them so well and wanting to take care of them. Tbh, Shanks and Buggy should just,, Find a kid in a treasure chest and keep the baby.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Special Interest 5

Warnings: non/dubcon, age gap, creep behaviour, and other dark elements. My username actually says you never asked for any of this.

Characters: Cole Turner, short!reader

Part of the Bookstore AU

Note: this one is a bit longer than I anticipated!

My warnings are not exhaustive but be aware this is a dark fic and may include potentially triggering topics. Please use your common sense when consuming content. I am not responsible for your decisions.

As usual, I would appreciate any and all feedback. I’m happy to once more go on this adventure with all of you! Thank you in advance for your comments and for reblogging.

“Hmm, I don’t know Camila,” Cole picks out the washer, “I don’t think this will fix the problem. Sounds like a different issue than the pipe.”

“Yes, well, my husband said to get this,” she ho-hums, “thanks so much for helping me find this.”

“No problem,” He grins, his baby blue eyes deceivingly bright, “I know this place pretty well. We order most things in bulk but you can’t wait weeks when it’s an emergency. Especially with farmwork.”

“Oh my, you are so responsible. It’s just you and your parents on the farm?” She flutters her lashes. Maybe your dad should be concerned.

You stand off to the side, staring down toilet seats as they chatter. Neither of them have stopped and you’re not bothered fading into the background. Hell, you prefer they forget you entirely. You look down at the cactus in your hand, you could just sneak off with this new prickly friend.

“Yeah. Sister comes to visit but someone needed to stay behind. There’s too much work for just my dad and we never recovered fully from the recession. Can’t really afford a hand.” Cole explains.

“Aw, oh, how dreadful,” your mother gestures like a melancholy Victorian widow. “I’m sure your parents appreciate how helpful you are…”

You don’t miss her eyes as they stray in your direction. You give a scowl, you’re helpful. You take the garbage out and do the dishes. Hell, you’re the only reason the toaster works again.

“Yeah well, I know when I was younger, they probably didn’t feel the same. You know, you just gotta get perspective and learn what’s important.”

Okay, this is ridiculous. They are drinking the same flavorade and you’re more of a cream soda girl. You peer around evasively.

“Well, mom, you got the washer thingy, we should get going. Dad’ll be waiting,” you say.

“I suppose you’re right. Oh, and we still have to hit Eddie’s for dinner,” she recalls, “hm, what a long day it’s been.”

“Eddie's? Oh, I know that place. Owner’s a buddy of mine. I could probably get you a deal.”

“We’re good,” you insist as you step forward, “we got our cactus and our thingamajig. We can pay for dinner.”

“Honey, he’s just being nice,” your mother reproaches, “it is so sweet of you, Cole, but it would be a bit much.”

“You know, that’s a good idea. I should head down that way too,” Cole swiftly diverts her denial, “mom and dad love a good kebab. I always try to bring ‘em something when I come to town.”

“Oh, my heart,” your mother squees, “you are such a good son.”

You clear your throat. Your mother gives you a look. Cole glances over, his head tilted victoriously. He’s effectively making you look like a real bum and you just made a couple hundred.

“Look, I can tell you two are in a hurry,” he shifts suddenly, reaching under his jacket, “I’ll give you my card. I’m down at the market three times a week. If you need any tips about the cactus or maybe looking for a buddy for it, you can always call.”

“Wow, thank you, Cole,” your mom accepts with a fawning gaze, “oh, honey, you hold onto this,” she waves the card in your direction, “I’ll just lose it.”

You reluctantly step closer and take the card. More like rip it up. You pinch it between your knuckles and retreat. Again, Cole peeks over at you.

“I gotta go grab that sod,” he leans back on his heel, “see ya around… I hope.”

“You too, sweetie,” your mom preens.

He backs up, his eyes flitting between you and your mom. He gives you a smile and slowly turns on his heel. He struts away with a bit of a hop, almost as if he’s nervous. You scoff and shake your head. What a show.

“He is so nice!” Your mother announces shrilly, “oh my, and so handsome. And tall and dreamy. His eyes, god those eyes.”

“Mom, you’re married. You know, to dad?” You roll your eyes.

“Oh, hush, I saw you looking at him and he was looking at you,” she fans herself, “you would make the cutest babies.”

“God, ew, another word and you're getting the cactus,” you warn.

“What? You too would be adorable and I can tell, he’s single. He didn’t mention a wife or anything. And a farm? You’d be set for life, and your kids could run all around–”

“He’s a stranger and you’re talking about babies,” you sneer, “please, before I throw up.”

“That whole hard to get thing, it doesn’t work, honey,” she chides.

“I’m not– I don’t want him to get me. I’d prefer I never see him again. Ever. Forever.”

She giggles, “don’t be so dramatic. What did he do to you? He was perfectly sweet. Good manners. Good posture…”

“Really mom, should I be concerned for your marriage,” you snort.

“If only. I think I’m a bit too old for him,” she mourns with a swoon.

“If we don’t get something to eat soon, I’m going to lose my appetite,” you stick your tongue out.

“You are a brat. I’m your mother, you know?” You set off down the aisle next to her as she finally abandons the plumbing shelf. “Why can’t you be like Cole. Such a good boy.”

“Oh my god! Mom, you don’t know him. How do you even know he told the truth? What if there is no farm?”

“You don’t know him either, do you? So maybe, before you assume the worst, you should give him a chance.”

“A chance?” You puff out, “never. He’s an order number, nothing else. And old.”

Your mom tisks and turns towards checkout. You avoid looking at her as her disappointment radiates off her. She wiggles the washer in her hand.

“Where’s that card, I’ll put it in my purse.”

“Ugh, take it,” you flick it at her, “I was just gonna dump it in the trash.”

“Why, with how prickly you are, we shouldn’t need any more cactuses,” she chides.

[see-arcane]

Why Quincey Had to Die at the Climax (and Set That Bittersweet Somber Mood): A Theory

Jack: Well, that was exciting. Glad you didn’t die, Quincey.

Quincey: Likewise. Oh, hey, here come Mina and the Professor. 

Art: Wow, Mina’s really sprinting. ...Like really, really booking it.

Quincey: Weird. We pretty well cleared things up here, I wonder what’s up.

Jack, taking a look at Jonathan, then moving a long step back: I can guess.

Jonathan, fresh from his berserker love-powered rage, just finished chucking a coffin full of dirt and grown-ass vampire like an apple crate with his bare hands, followed by chopping Dracula’s head off, white hair billowing, eyes burning in their dark lashes, lined in rosy sunset like the Victorian answer to a bodice ripper book cover: What do you mean?

Mina, slamming into him like a smitten cannonball: If We Do Not Reach a Bedroom Tonight, Everyone Else Will Just Have to Suffer the Consequences*

*They spend the next several minutes welded to each other’s kisses. Both have to be reminded to take breaks for air. They only listen half the time.

[querade]

Doctor who's season 13?? ESPECIALLY the Yaz Hug moment

So with the new specials coming out I thought I'd post my thoughts on the season 13 finale

The doctor breaks herself into three different versions ,three different pieces overwhelmed by solving three equally pressing problems. I hear everyone’s issues with the 13th doctor etc etc but this was the PERFECT finale to her character--the entire arc is so chock-full of different problems EVERYWHERE that the doctor is squashing out.

I didn't realize it until then but the entire point of the Flux and the doctor closing herself off and not telling yaz and dan anything--AHH such a good idea!! It's the perfect way to represent everything as her arc comes to its climax.

Also just. The 13th doctor doesn't want to worry people so she doesn't tell her companions squat and just constantly deflects. you know how Clara uses the TARDIS and pseudoscience as a coping mechanism to get away from the Bad Things she has to eventually deal with?? YEA. NOW THE DOCTOR IS DOING IT.

in a way you see she's kind of grateful that she's in the middle of all this, because then she doesn't have to face anything :3—which is terrible and awful, but easy to rationalize because 'people's lives are on the line and she has to save them'!!

Naturally the doctor has always had a problem with being far too selfless. and while this arc doesn't state it directly, the acting and the camera work and the situation all state it indirectly enough. And Yaz is kind of the only one who notices cause she's the only one who's been there long enough?? anyways ahhhh when the companions finally reunite after like two episodes of being apart, its just. the doctor forces herself to stop the 'how do we fix this' brain and she makes herself pause and just goes "wait" and she stops and HUGS YAZ for like three seconds. It's the first break, the first silent, not-really-tense moment you get in an EXTREMELY long time. And even then it doesn't feel like long enough.

THE YAZ HUG MOMENT IS SO GOOD: I guess I noticed it was weird that it lasted so long but I couldn't exactly figure out why it was such a good choice. And then. In that whole meet-up scene, the cuts are SO very well done. You have the camera circling her, spinning, and the Doctor sees someone, says their name—

"Yaz! Dan! Kate Stewart, Kate Sewart! Jericho! Victorian-looking bloke!"

With every new bit of information, in a row, it jumps to a new cut, a new angle, with no continuity of the Doctor's previous pose—and i mean no continuity, from one cut to the next she is 180 degrees with completely different hands and head positions— but with possibly MORE stuff that she has to cram into this situation and spread herself even thinner--and it feels kind of like she's losing her mind.

(She kind of was.)

But she doesn't realize it yet or want to face it or can't face it or whatever, just keeps going, and then forces herself to pause. and to stop.

After all the losses, loss after loss after loss after loss in this arc, after making an extremely difficult, selfless decision, after all it cost her, she takes just a little selfish moment for herself to say, "Wait." and she chooses to not do anything. she chooses to take three long seconds to turn and hug yaz. not anyone else.

Of course, once she does, the camera stops spinning and idk i was just like 'WOW we really have been going nonstop for just a ridiculous amount of time haven't we.' and that was kinda when i realized that yea, I am gonna miss season 13's version of jodie whittaker.

[enter-drfrog]

CPDS as quotes from my theatre department’s discord

“You were born out of hate sex? That explains a lot about you” -Robert Grove (almost definitely in reference to Chris)

“I could really use some meat snacks” -Max Bennett

“Where the fuck are my lips?” -Dennis Tyde (except he’s too sweet, I don’t think he would swear intentionally)

“Three monks, dressed as……three monks” -Chris Bean (this is just the nine wise men quote)

“I don’t jump ropes. I prefer to trip on them” -Annie Twilloil

“Something’s wrong with this kid. He watched SpongeBob…and now he’s all gay” -Trevor Watson (for reasons I can’t explain)

“Go sing a romantic ballad about the moon, you cuck!” -Robert Grove

“All I had was an inhaler and a dream” -Vanessa Wilcock-Wynn-Carroway

“You guys got skittles in there???” -Max Bennett

“I spit on Charles Dickens” -Robert Grove

“She has a son and a husband. She’s seen boy chest before. It’s just boy chest!” -Sandra Wilkinson

“Wow. Standing up is crazy” -Vanessa-Wilcock-Wynn-Carroway

“I used to get mad at people and approach them teeth-first” -Robert Grove

“He got that little Victorian orphan in him” -Annie Twilloil (probably about Dennis)

“The only thing straight about me is my hair. I have scoliosis” -Chris Bean

“I’ve always wanted you to die. That’s my dream” -Robert Grove (about Chris obviously)

“We have a lot of hoes” -Dennis Tyde

“The world would be a better place if people were having sex instead of war” -Annie Twilloil

“Did you watch those videos as a kid? Probably not. You were probably normal” -Max Bennett

“You know a lot of words. And you said a lot of them. And I didn’t know any of them” -Dennis Tyde

“I’m trying to be with you, not like you” -Sandra Wilkinson

“I did wander…..once” -Max Bennett

“It’s giving bubonic plague” -Annie Twilloil

“Hey listen, I’ve fucked a lot of dudes in my day” -Trevor Watson

“This is now a dictatorship and I win” -Robert Grove

“And look at how much more mature I am. Look at my accolades” -Chris Bean

“Pumpkins or ghosts?” “Errrr—Orange!” -Vanessa Wilcock-Wynn-Carroway

“Cringe, cringe, cringe” -Jonathan Harris (after ‘not so fast Inspector!!’ or not being able to open a single door)

“I’m just a really bad person” -Robert “Yeah you give off that vibe” -Trevor

“Ack, why do you have your arms out?” -Annie Twilloil

“I just love bullying children” -Robert Grove

“I just want to frown all the time and listen to rock and roll and be sad” -Trevor Watson

[fraugwinska]

Chapter 5 - Junction

Junction (noun) 1. a place where things come together (esp. roads/railroads) 2. a place or point of meeting

Tags & Warnings: none

“And this is the en-suite bathroom! We just had a new shower installed! Not every room has it's own, so you're one of the lucky ones!”

Charlie was made of nothing but energy. Like a bouncy ball, she jumped from here to there, showing you every inch of your room with eager fervor. She seemed so excitable, happy to have someone to show around. A vast contrast to her girlfriend, who stood at the closed door of your room, arms crossed and with a sour face.

“Do you like it?”

You tried to soften your face, it wasn't a smile, but well. It was all you got.

“It's very, very nice Charlie, I appreciate it very much. Thank you.”

Charlie let out a happy giggle. Vaggie came to her side, eyeing you suspiciously.

“What exactly do you do, as Alastors assistant?”, she inquired, her tone harsh. You looked at her with an indifferent look.

“Anything he tasks me to do.” Short, simple, vague answer. Robotic, a little voice in your head whispered, and you added “I am just basically there to make his everyday life easier, is all.” Better.

“Did he hire you?”, Vaggie pressed. Charlie looked uncomfortable, her eyes darting from you to Vaggie and back.

“Of course he did. I wouldn't work for him if he didn't.”

For a few seconds, there was only silence, a staring contest. Your stoic wall of indifference against her fiery canons of indignation. Charlie, laughing nervously, and brave as she was, took a step in between you two.

“We're just a little.. surprised. Alastor never told us about an assistant. And well...”, she wrung her hands, smiling shyly, “Given his... reputation, Vaggie... we were wondering if you were really here because you wanted to.”

Your tail swished around your ankles in a fit of annoyance. “I'm here on my own volition. Alastor asked me to help, and I said yes, so you really can relax.” Not a lie, at least technically.

Charlie put a hand on Vaggies shoulder. “See, Vags, it's okay. Cool down.” She gave you an apologetic smile. “Please believe us, we are really happy to have you here. We're just.. um.. worried about you.”

You shook you head. He wasn't exaggerating when he said that they were on the edge with him. “I can assure you, I really am fine. Alastor is very kind to me.”

You could literally hear their jaws drop. Vaggie even heaved in outrage. “Kind? KIND? You got to be shitting me!”

You looked puzzled that such a simple sentence would spark this much.... reaction. Who would be this angry about such a statement? Charlie intervened quickly. “Wow. I mean... WOW. Well, that's a... word.... you don't hear often together with... Alastor. Huh. Okay. That's cool, then.” She took your hands, looking at you earnestly.

“But just in case, if you ever have something you want to talk about, or something you need help with, please, come see me... us. OUR...”, she pronounced the last word prominently, a not-so-subtle warning to her companion to calm down, “...door is always open for you. Now, we'll let you settle. See you in the foyer for dinner in about an hour?”

You thanked her again, promising you'd join them for dinner and after Charlie practically pushed a still fuming Vaggie out the door, you were alone. You rubbed your temples, breathing. The room was big, bright and very victorian-esque. Thick, cream colored brocade curtains lined the big double window overseeing Pentagram city. You've never seen a canopy bed like the one right next to it before – it looked like it was carved out of a single trunk, warm, creamy wood plushed with rich, thick red velvet and matching red curtains. You sat down. The thick mattress was soft and felt extravagant. You felt a bit lost in it. With an exasperated moan you let your back hit the soft cushions, allowing yourself to feel the delicate linens and squishy mattress, humming deeply in accordance with the comfort. This was your new home now. It felt nothing like it, but you would come to manage. You always did. The bed made it easier, enveloping you in a warm embrace, and you closed your eyes and started to finally relax. The room was quiet, except for a subtle buzzing sound. Your ears perked up and you opened your eyes, pushing yourself up on your elbows while you scanned your surroundings. You found the source of the buzzing to be a single one of Alastor's shadows. You recognized him immediately, his shape and cyan eyes and maw were so distinctive. It was one of his more sentient ones, one that was one of your masters closest servants that had a habit on spying on you at nights. You sometimes heard Alastor call him Ozul. You raised a brow at him.

“You heard what was said. You can go and tell him now, everything went a-okay.”

The shadow hissed at you, not particulary aggressive, but not too friendly either, like a child blowing you a raspberry, then he disappeared. You shook your head. Great. Now you had a babysitter here too. You cracked your back and started to unpack.

Ah, how he loved the smell of the unholy trinity – he had cut up the c elery, onion and green bell pepper, and in the pot they went, together with jalapeno and a good measure of garlic. He always hummed a tune while he cooked, it evoked so many fond memories. Just when he put in the rice, some stock and crushed tomatoes, he felt something tug on his pantleg. Without moving even an inch, he looked down, lids almost closed. The kitchen was left empty, as usual when he was in there... the others were still avoiding being in a room with him for too long. Good.

„Yes, Ozul?“, Alastor asked his shadow companion, while he expertisely added seasoning. Oh, that wonderful smell of home.

Ş̷̞͂̀h̷̜͕͋̌e̵̖̊̕ ̷̛̟̈́a̵͎͐l̴͇̃̀o̵̤̳̎͛n̷͔̅e̸̩͝ ̴̄̽͜n̶͍̬̎ö̵̻̝́̀w̷̙͚̒̉.̶̢̇͘͜ ̷͙̔̔s̵̬̲͋̒h̴̑̓͜ë̷̙́́ ̴̮̓̃g̷̨̓o̸̩̿͠ǫ̷̣̑d̸̺̍ ̷̠͈̔͂ḡ̸̺̳i̵̭̤̓r̴̯̚ļ̷̤͐̽  (She alone now. She good girl)

„So, my little kitten had her first trial by fire and didn't burn herself?“, he quibbed, smiling gleefully. He wasn't surprised. Ah, how obedient she was. He would have preferred her to heed his advice of smiling, but he had sensed her rare hesitation and let this matter go for now. He could always command her, if it started to be a problem with the snoopy folks here afterall. Additionally, and he was surprised of himself, he found the thought of her smile being an exclusive right to see quite satisfying.

s̶͔͝h̵̦͋e̷̘̜̋ ̵̠̃̏ͅś̸͈̉â̷̬̗i̴̞̐d̷̬̎ ̸̳̰͝y̷̲̽o̸̙̔́ṷ̸͙̌ ̵̨̙̐̐k̶̤̯͌i̶̙͇͛n̷̝̞̿̋d̴̩͙̓͝.̶̟͍̋̍ ̴̡͂͆ǫ̴̯̑t̶̬͛h̸̘̲̆e̷͓̲͛ŗ̸͉̋s̵̢̝̑ ̵̹̮́ą̸̞̂n̴͈̋̄g̷͖̊r̸̝̒͝y,̵̞͔̑͠ ̶̫̳̂b̶̲͓̒̈́u̶̜̚t̶̠͖̽́ ̸̻̿s̵̤̈́͝h̵̙̾͛ę̵̰̀̈́ ̵̫̀ḡ̴̜̺o̸̤͊ő̵̗d̸̳̯̓̑ (She said you kind. others angry, but she good.)

Now that turned his head. She said he was kind, he thought, and couldn't help but snicker. Such an interesting girl he had, he could imagine the look of her heart-shaped face while she said that to the wary princess and her little angry companion. He heard Rosies voice ringing in his ears.

'This girl would do anything to please you.'

And how eager she was indeed, to do him right. It amazed him how he didn't even need to install fear in her to behave exactly as he wanted her to. She had promised him loyalty, and against all odds it seemed as if she would hold up to that promise. He couldn't be more satisfied. Slowly but surely, she would help improve his standing here, freeing his way to more prosperous opportunities.

í̵̘̭͗s p̵̣̍̈ṛ̸̚ȅ̵̫t̸̡͙̆t̵̮̀ŷ̸͙̚ (is pretty.)

Ozul hummed content. Alastor rose a brow at him.

l̵̡̝̃i̵̠͝k̴͍̇e̴͂̑͜s̴̹̕ ̴̦̬̿͗v̸͇͋̐o̴͔̘̿ȉ̷̪c̷̰̝͒͘ê̴̱͗,̸̢͍̅͆ ̵̗͉̇͠s̶̡̀̏͜ḧ̸̥̙́e̵̤̊̓ ̶̱̔͛m̷͕̫̒ŏ̶̠̭͛a̷̼̝͆n̵̖͛̍s̸̝̠͝ ̷͈̳̓ṕ̶̛͓ȓ̸̲ȅ̵̱͜ẗ̶̥͉́̊t̷̝͆̈y̸͙̔̽(likes voice. she moans pretty.)

He tutted. “You should better know how to behave yourself, my little fellow, or I'll have to send someone else to guard her.”

Ozul just buzzed and hummed mischievously, rushing back over the walls to her room. Alastorshook his head, a little exasperated. The bay leafs he added sunk into the stew, and bubbles popped on the surface. He covered the stew and set his pocket watch down at the counter – making a mental note to check it in twenty minutes.

As inappropriate as his little naughty shadow was, he thought for a second that he couldn't say Ozul was entirely wrong.

You had just finished to put your toiletries in the bathroom when you heard loud, obnoxious knocking on your room door. You cautiously went to open it, hand almost on the golden doorknob, when it suddenly - and violently - swung open. You had to jump back to save your toes from getting cut off.

“Heya, fellow neigbour.”

It was Angel, waltzing into your room and throwing himself on your freshly made bed with a long, lascivious sigh.

“Man, they gave you one of the good ones, lucky bitch. My room looks like a dump, compared. Well, maybe it's also because of all the toys and trash lying around, but I'm too hot to clean, 'ya know?”

He stretched himself loudly, and turned himself on his belly, facing you. His face was full of mischief.

“Can I help you, Angel?”, you asked calmly, softly shutting the door, leaving it open a bit, just in case. You hoped Ozul wouldn't barge back in here in plain sight. That would not be good.

“Ah, I just wanted to check 'ya out, calm your perky tits. Sooooo...” Angel wiggled his eyebrows. “You sure you're just an assistant to our own strawberry pimp? 'Ya never, you know... shed his antlers?”

No one would've NOT blushed at the very explicit gestures Angel made.

“A-Absolutely not.”

You felt heat creeping up your neck. Angel seemed disappointed, although he didn't give up on prying more.

“Hey, no judgment! I wouldn't blame 'ya, toots. I mean, you could fuck way worse down here. I bet 'ya good money he would be into some weird dominatrix-shit. Or a praise-kink! And he's kinda hot, if you don't mind the whole creepy dial-stare which is definately his O-face and the piss-stained teeth.” he picked on his nails, glancing at you playfully.

“Please don't talk about him like that.”, you steadied your voice, a hint of anger in it you just couldn't suppress which Angel immediately picked up. He let out a small, teasing laugh.

“Uh, kitty got claws. Okay, okay, no more dissing the deer daddy in front of his pet cat. But I'm just sayin'.”, the spider stood up, and oooooh yes, he was a spider alright. He used his four arms to push himself from your bed, ruining your hard work of smoothing the sheets out neatly. “I work in the business. And – aside these god-awful grandma-clothes, 'ya could get some fine ass down here. Those freaking eyes alone are meant for a million buck 'rail-me look'. Uuuuuh, mind if I take these? Thanks!”, he quickly grabbed two of the cookie-packs Charlie placed on a golden tray on your nightstand. “Fat Nuggets loves these.”

“Sure, I don't like raisin cookies anyway. Take all you want.”

You had a feeling it was best just to pick your battles, and cookies were definitely not it. Especially raisin cookies... And what was a Fat Nuggets?

“So... you've got the room next to mine?”

Angel sneered. “Yeah, so fair warning, if 'ya hear some 'loud noises' at night, don't come knocking, it ruins the mood.” He winked, and your treacherous ears twitched in a wave of amusement. Fucking traitors.

“I'll keep that in mind, but thanks for the warning.”

Be likable. You mentally checked to see your face was still void of any detectable expression, and added “Same goes to you, if I'll ever get some.”

Angel stared at you for a moment, mouth open in surprise, then he burst out laughing, patting you on the back.

“Oh shit, toots, you do have a little bite in ya. And here I thought you'd be as uptight and boring as your frigid boss. 'Ya know what? Tell me if 'ya ever wanna get 'ya nasty on. I'm not into chicks, but I know a few guys with really biiiiiig...”

“Please don't.”

“...Personalities.”, he gave you a grin not unlike a cheshire cat. “Anyway, gotta dip. See ya downstairs, puss-n-boobs.”

And with another laugh he was gone. You felt like at least that interaction went kind of well. You were... likable, weren't you? At least, he didn't leave mad like Vaggie or worried like Charlie, so you were pleased with that. A mocking hum made you almost jump, and you saw Ozul had indeed come back, looming in your vanity mirror. Fuck, when did he sneak in? What did he hear? You caught a glance of your face in the mirror. Your cheeks were still a little flushed from Angels lewd remarks. He was so... blunt, and absolutely no-nonsense about the idea of Alastor and you... NO! You scolded yourself for even thinking about it. That cheeky shadow buzzed, it sounded like an amused snicker.

“Oh, grow up.”

You quickly went back to the bathroom and splashed some icy water in your face. After checking your face to see the last reddish hue fade into ghostly gray, you ignored the snickering shadow and were out the door.

You skipped down the stairs – god, so many stairs, this place was in dire need of an elevator – and finally landed on the ground floor. You heard the lively sound of tableware and glasses clinking, muffled chatter, laughing and arguing. These people were so loud. It reminded you of your time in the academy. Which one was it again? The sound of people, coming together, spending time in a group, bound by a shared experience. Even as mundane as dinner. You followed the sound, but stopped when you saw the winged cat-demon, eyes sloppily closed, playing with cards at the bar. Alone. You hesitated, then you walked over.

“Go away kid, bar's closed.”, he grumbled, pulling away from you and swirling a dark, brown liquid in a glas.

“I don't want a drink. You are Husk right? I didn't get to properly introduce myself.”

His gaze went a bit darker, but he didn't stop the spiral movements of the thick, slightly dirty glas.

“No need to. I've got all I need to know about you when you came in with that piece of shit.”

He took a big gulp out of the glass, his eyes wandering away into the distance. You thought for a moment. He seemed angry at you, but you couldn't for the afterlife of you figure out why. You pulled over one of the barstools and sat down, resting your arms on the sticky bar, eyeing him curiously.

“I guess you don't like my boss very much?”

Husk huffed, growling. "No shit."

“And because I chose to work for him, you don't like me very much either?”, you inquired, tilting your head a bit, softening your face into what you thought was a understanding expression.

“If you're not one of the stupid fucks like me who made the mistake of dealing with this clown – yeah. No one in their right mind would choose to be around that bastard.”

Oh. So Husk was another soul Alastor owned. You surpressed the urge to raise a brow at that. What did happen between them, you wondered silently.

“I see.”, you finally break the silence, playing with a few of the cards splayed around the bartop. “I won't reason against that, the 'not being in the right mind'. I mean, we are in hell, right, if I was right in the head I wouldn't be here? But I don't need to be like Alastor to work with him.” You made a little house of cards. Husk glanced at you, suspiciously.

“I just want to say, I hope you can get past my job and decide, whether you just don't like my position or me as a person, is all.” You stood up, placing the stool back neatly and looking at Husk, whose eyebrows twitched, unsure what to make of your statement. “Are you coming to dinner?”

“Nah, I'm covered.”, he refilled his glass and turned away. You sighed defeated and turned towards the humming voices. That would be one hard nut to crack at another time.

***

The dining table almost bent under the weight of the food, glasses and elbows. Dinner was as chaotic as suspected. Alastor's jambalaya was delicious – as always – but you hardly ate anything. Or rather: You didn't get to eat. Every time you wanted to take a bite, someone at the table asked you a question you tried you best to answer. You wished for five minutes of peace to just eat and listen, talking felt straining. Alastor sat to your left, casually conversing with Charlie. Angel sat on your right, viciously trying to get you to laugh by telling dirty jokes or whispering stories of 'funny' accidents at his porn shoots in finest details into your ear.

“Okay Rocky, I'll get out the big guns. Do 'ya know what the difference is between kinky and perverted?“

You sighed and put down your spoon. Again. Angel quickly found his favourite nickname for you, 'Rocky', because of your stone cold expression. „No Angel. What is the difference?“

Angel giggled, „Kinky is when you tickle 'ya girlfriend with a feather, perverted is when 'ya use the whole fucking chicken!“

Angel laughed loud and slammed his fists on the table. You just rolled your eyes.

“Mh. At least that one was better than your gynecologist joke.”, you deadpanned, finally shoving some food in your mouth. Angel gasped theatrically, a hand outraged on his chest fluff.

“Ex-fucking-cuse me, at least I have a sense of humor. You wouldn't get a good joke if it danced around you wearing a cheap elephant thong.”

You quickly brushed your hair back to hide the twitch in your ears. That came close.

“Angel, that poor girl will fully loose her appetite if you continue to pester her with these filthy antics.”, Alastor smirked dangerously. Angel returned his grin, leaning a bit over the table, eyebrows suggestively high. And you sat chewing, in between them, trying to disappear into thin air. Great.

“Aw smiles. I never took you for the kind of man to get so protective over a pussy.”

You choked on your food, coughing quietly. Alastor and Angel both looked at you, Angel delighted to have some kind of success in getting a reaction from you, Alastor exasperated and almost accusatory.

“Sorry, I bit into a jalapeno.”, you mumbled and hid behind your napkin as you patted your mouth. Charlie looked at you, bemused. She sat opposite of you, her plate almost cleaned.

“So, (Y/n), do you like it here so far?”

You nodded, still feeling Alastor's eyes on you. Be likable. “I do, it's very... lively. Reminds me of my time in the Academy.”

Charlie smiled to you, encouragingly. “Oh, I've been dying to ask – what did you do when... well, when you were alive?”

You chewed your food slowly to buy some time. “I was a performer. I've studied musical theater at the Academy, but never made big shows after graduating.”

Charlie was over the moon, bulldozing you with a million questions at once. Vaggie glared at you, her eyes narrowed. “So, you were an actress?” You didn't need to catch on, her thinly veiled accusation of you putting on an act was heard loud and clear. And by the static that bristled on your left, Alastor heard it too. You calmly gathered the rest of your Jambalaya on your spoon, ignoring her stare.

“More or less. Acting, singing, dancing. I've always liked the combination of all elements. After graduating, I stuck mostly to sing and dance though.”

Angel snorted. “No wonder you didn't make it, toots. Do you even have another look other than 'lobotomized'?”

“Angel!”, Charlie scolded, feeling very offended for you.

“What?! Look at her. All she does is this!”, he did a poor imitation of your expressionless face. He teasingly poked your side. “Maybe she just needs a really good shag to pull that frown upside down.” You felt Alastor's static prickling slipping through your clothes and all over your skin. He was getting really agitated. Shit. Be likable. What would someone like Angel find likeable and end this conversation?

“Well, Angel, if one good shag would make anyone smile, you should look like my boss by now.“

The whole table started giggling as Angel playfully protested, even Vaggies lips twitched, though she quickly turned her head. You heard a low chuckle from your left, out of the corner of your eyes you saw Alastors smile widen and his features relaxing. A sign of approval. You felt better.

The radio demon had also finished his meal and conjured a crystal decanter and a matching glass, sipping on something that looked like whiskey. You stood up and took the chance to flee further conversation, offering Niffty to help with clearing the table and washing the dishes. One by one, the others left after saying good night. Angel winked at you as he went back to his room. He was abrasively raunchy, yes, but aside that it felt like he would be a generally a nice, funny person to be around. Charlie gave you a warm smile before retreating to bed, and even Vaggie, although still frowning at you, nodded and wished you a somewhat-friendly good nights rest. The last to go was Niffty, enthusiastically thanking you for helping her clean before she jumped out of the dining room chasing after some rouge bugs, leaving you and Alastor alone.

“I've heard you steered the wild waters today quite smoothly, my dear.”, Alastor smiled in satisfaction, toasting to you. Your tail swished nervously. “I must say I expected nothing less from you. Good girl.”

His last words made your cheeks feel instantaneously hot and you quickly turned to the kitchenette to grab a bowl. “Thank you, sir.” Get a grip, (Y/n), Angel just got you in a really weird head space. “Alastor, dear. I think you've made very good progress with the princess, but I'm even more surprised our only guest seems to take a special liking to you.”

“I think Angel just finds it's funny to try and make me blush.”, you murmured, scooping some leftover jambalaya into the bowl.

“Yes, his sense of humor can be quite... obstreperous.”, he hummed, running a long finger on the rim of his now empty glass while intensely watching you, a subtle curl on his lips. “I sincerely hope you don't plan on taking him up on his offer, dear – I know for a fact he has a rather miserable taste in potential partners.”

You almost cut your hand off with the serrated knife you held as you cut a thick slice of cornbread. That fucking tattletale of a shadow.

“I most certainly will NOT.”

“Glad to hear that, kitten.” With a swish of his hand, he vanished the remaining cluttered dishes, the decanter and the glasses, leaving the kitchen and table sparkling. The deer demon swaggered over to you – thank god your face cooled down by now, and he leaned over your shoulder, eyeing the meal in your hands. He was oddly close. And warm. “Ah, darling, I'm happy to see that my mothers recipes never fail to impress. Are you planning on having a little midnight snack?”

“That's not for me.” You left him standing, looking very impish yourself and Alastor thought he could have even seen the hint of a smile tucking on your lips. With intrigued suspicion he watched you walk through the small corridor with the meal in your hands, melting into his shadows and attaching himself on your own to follow you unseen.

The sound of your clicking heels, not much unlike your masters, echoed in the now sinister looking, empty foyer, startling Husk awake from his alcohol-induced doze. He looked up through glossy, dark eyes, grumbling something about 'fucking loud-ass shoes' but shut up when you placed the portion you had prepared in front of him on the counter.

“In case you want to give your liver some well-deserved rest. It's still warm, and the corn bread is really tasty. Good night, Husk.”

You didn't wait for his reaction, or reply. Alastor's shadow detached from yours with a giddy fizz and scurried away. When you reached the staircase, you could hear the satisfying sound of cutlery against porcelain. One step at a time.

“Listen, Vaggie, I hear you. But (Y/n) hasn't even been here a day, and she's given us no reason to be so... distrustful.” “Hon. I love that you see only the good and nice in people, I do. But I don't want that to be a weakness they can exploit.”

He listened closely, hidden in the shadows of the corridor. Such a stroke of luck, but he had always had a habit on being in the right place at the right time. This conversation was definitely not intended for his ears.

“Well I refuse to judge her before I even got to really know her. You try to look out for me, for the hotel, and that's like....great. But we need to give her the benefit of the doubt.”

“I don't have a good feeling about her, Charlie... Even if she is not a bad person per se, if that asshole is using her...” “Then we'll show her compassion and we will help her, not throw her out. Alastor may be the radio demon, but I'm not a nobody. If she is really being used, we can show her that we all be there for her and protect her. 'Killing with kindness', you know that's what I'm best at.”

“I know, I know, you are right... Just... we need to be careful.”

The room became quiet, and Alastor had no intention to linger. He heard what he needed to hear and soundlessly vanished, flowing into his shadows and into his own room.

The little exchange was indeed interesting. He wasn't surprised at all about Vaggie's apprehension of his little doll, and Charlies naive sense of benevolence in her defense. No, no, no, that was to be expected. What was out of the ordinary was the comical belief that they could turn (Y/n) against him. Ah, such simple minds they had, he thought bemused. He did good on keeping the deal with her a secret. They would've been much more hostile if they knew about the circumstances. He took off his overcoat and hung it up his coat rack. He sat down in his armchair by the fire, watching over to his conjured swamp. Fireflies illuminated the bayou in a soft green and yellow light. It never failed to calm him, looking over the shimmering water, listening to the soft rustle of the cattails. He closed his eyes and smelled the damp and musky scents. Fatigue crept into his limbs, heavier and more intense than usual. Maybe, he thought, his body could allow itself to sacrifice a part of this night for a little sleep. But his mind was as busy and restless as always, and he supposed he would have to settle for just this small moment of tranquility. A soft knock on the door pulled him back to the present. He glanced at his wall clock. It was almost midnight. He sighed and walked over to the door. Whoever it was that disturbed him now, they'd better have a good reason. He opened his room to two golden eyes, shifting in colors of the rainbow by the firelight.

“Why kitten, what brings you to my humble abode at this unholy time?”

He tilted his head, surprised to see her - She had never visited his room at night. His gaze wandered to her black satin dressing gown – Rosie insisted on gifting it to her - loosely thrown over a simple, cream-colored leisure suit. She wore her hair down as if she had already gotten ready for her night's rest. A steaming mug rested in her hands, it smelled like vanilla, honey and lavender.

“I'm sorry to intrude this late.”, she spoke softly, almost a whisper. “I came to bring you this...”

She reached into the pocket of her gown, pulling out something round and golden and familiar. His pocket watch. His eyes widened.

“I went down into the kitchen to get a glass of water and found it hidden behind the fruit bowl. I was sure it was yours, so I wanted to return it to you right away.”

His hand reached out and brushed her delicate fingers as he retrieved his possession. He hadn't even noticed it wasn't in it's usual pocket in his overcoat. He must have forgotten to put it back after he had finished cooking. He felt a bit annoyed at his own negligence. He really should get some sleep....

“It is indeed mine, and very precious to me. How very thoughtful of you, my dear.”

She just nodded, a gesture that had become so common to her. Then she held out the cup to him.

“You looked a bit weary today, so... I made a cup of hot milk for you. To sleep better.”

There were only a few times in his hellish life Alastor could recall that he had been caught off guard. This was one of them. Fortunately, one strength of his was his unfaltering smile, he was trained in keeping his impulsive emotions under control. But underneath this familiar mask he stared at the small, weak servant of his, her arm patiently streched out to him, in absolute astonishment. He carefully took the cup from her. It was piping hot. Freshly made.

“I'll leave you to rest now. Good night, Alastor.” “Sleep tight, kitten.”

And with that, she turned on her heels and quickly blended with the darkness of the corridor. He closed the door slowly when her footsteps became only an echo, and looked at the beverage in his hands. His shoulders shook, and finally, he allowed himself to laugh. His shadows swirled and purred, startled by the bellowing laughter of their master. When he sat back down by the fire, he still chuckled. He brought the cup to his lips, savoring the creamy, subtly sweet taste. Poor, poor naive princess. She would do better to prepare herself for bitter disappointment. This girl was his.

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[hometoursandotherstuff]

It’s dark, and it needs work. But, it’s got some great features, and the real estate ad says it can possibly be used for a business (noooooo, not an office!). This 1900 Victorian is located in Macomb, Illinois, has 3bd. 2.5ba, and is listed for only $107K. Give it a look. 

The first thing we see as we enter is beautiful original wood & floors. I would like to see what’s under that carpet and the wood wall looks like it’s been stripped and re-stained, so it needs some sealer.

You can just see a glimpse of the beautiful ceiling millwork.

Wow, gorgeous fireplace. Also, the carpet really matches the wallpaper. It could stay awhile.

Look at the fabulous floors. Love that. 

Windows w/original wood- look at that dental crown molding! I don’t think that the tiny corbels are original, though.

Gold ceiling, medallion and beautiful chandelier. Love the door and columns. It’s dark, but there’s some lovely millwork on the right.

Another original door, ceiling beams, and a cool light fixture. Love the walls, too. Must be the dining room.

You can see that gorgeous fireplace from here and look at the size of the crown molding.

Wow, the windows in the turret out front. Look at the beautifully detailed crown molding. 

Hmmm...looks like a picnic bench up there. Don’t like the kitchen, it’s a dated reno, but it’s not urgent. It’s still a useable kitchen for now. Plus, the appliances are new.

This bathroom has been painted over, and it would look great with reproduction Victorian plumbing fixtures.

There’s a lot of wallpaper in this house. Some of it should be removed, which is a lot of work.

The hall to the bedrooms still has the original gas light fixture on the wall. 

Not lovin’ the shower, but the pedestal sink is cool. 

This bd. needs some sprucing up.

Bd. set up as a family room. Loving all the original doors.

Why do they keep it so dark? Open the shades. Looks like a nice new floor in here.

Is that a grapevine? I LOVE grapevines. My grandparents had one and I couldn’t get enough of those sweet Concord grapes. 

Nice little porch on the back.

Large yard with a garage.

Oh, how can you resist this? Look at how pretty she is. I hope an office doesn’t buy it, it needs to stay a house.

https://www.century21.com/property/501-n-lafayette-street-macomb-il-61455-C2182973690

[the-boney-rolls]

The Great Covid Beatles Binge, Day 2: Give My Regards to Broad Street

Hoo boy, here we go!

OK so we open with a stern/bored looking Paul stuck in traffic in the rain and it looks like he's spacing out... hey, Paul, are you starting to daydream? Paul? Is this whole movie about to be a dream, Paul? Oh god

This silly little car! The computer, the carpet, the pool ball gear shift. It's giving the 80's car version of the Beatles house in Help! It's also giving hyper-masculine in a way that is, I'm sorry, not convincing.

This plot is already deeply inscrutable. Something about some missing tapes, a reformed criminal that Paul knows somehow and trusts for some reason, and some ominous business men. Something bad will happen at midnight if the tapes aren't found. OK!

Ringo looks so cool and hot! That vest over that sick as hell dragon shirt. Yes. This scene is genuinely funny, too -- Ringo spends the entirety of "Here, There and Everywhere" and "Yesterday" searching through his mountains of drum equipment looking for brushes, only to find them too late. Apparently, the reason for this scene is that Ringo just didn't want to re-record old Beatles songs!

And now we have Paul, Ringo, George Martin and Geoff Emerick all together in a scene! Makes me think about how George Harrison apparently was a little miffed Paul didn't just call him to ask for filmmaking advice since it was something he had experience with. What could have been!

“Wanderlust” is such a great song, actually, damn.

“I’m not a bad boy, really. I’m just — er, manipulated” John??

Now this is more like it! Surprise Linda in drag, hell yes!

I don't know why this scene is happening? It's a rehearsal for... something? But I'll take it. I love "Ballroom Dancing" and I love vaudeville Paul.

I'm starting to feel like Paul's grandpa in AHDN, "so far, I've been in a train and a room, and a car and a room, and a room and a room." Did Paul's experience on that set define what a movie is to him? "Ah yes, a movie must include lots of transportation from one location to another and then some musical scenes." But dear, it worked because there were jokes! And all four of you to play off each other.

I.......... what

This is Silly Love Songs, of all things!

Again, I don't know why this scene is happening in the context of the movie. Is it another rehearsal for something? A music video? Television special? Who knows, Yoko! But OK here we go, I sure am having fun! Linda is extremely into it. That slap bass kills. There's a Michael Jackson impersonator for some reason? Sure! It makes no sense but I love this man and his bizarre beautiful mind.

So now we're doing band rehearsal in some kind of barn? Or abandoned warehouse? Or something? All of the plot of this movie seems to happen in dialog in cars en route to some ambiguous musical engagement.

“Do you think we can get some heat in here or are we practicing to be Canadians?” God bless you, Ringo.

“Should we try Not Such a Bad Boy” “Do we have to?” “Yeah” Bossy Paul bosses around a Beatle, we love to see it.

Is this song about him or John? 

The French horn player coming in late to record "For No One," inexplicably in a bright red motorcycle helmet, so late that he’s preparing up until right before the solo starts. Reminds me of that story of Ringo recording Hey Jude. But it also feels very symbolic of something. There are so many odd inscrutable details in this movie, it could almost be Lynchian in someone else's hands.

“We’re running, and running out of time too” It feels meaningful but I don't know how.

Hello Mr. Darcy! Wow, can I have an entire movie that’s just this Victorian dream sequence? Can we go back in time and do a Beatles movie period piece, please??

The strings in this which are inspired by but are not quite "Eleanor Rigby" are lovely. Apparently this whole sequence is called "Eleanor's Dream," which implies that Paul is Eleanor. Make of that what you will, I suppose.

I like that Linda is a pants-wearing photographer in this period scene. Linda's gotta Linda.

This strikes me as very Evil Beatles. Again, make of that what you will.

Barbara and Linda are acting the HELL out of this going over the waterfall scene damn.

I don't know, I could screen grab this entire segment, it's amazing, it's insane.

But I can't gloss over Paul being horny for Ghost Horse Girl Linda. Incredible.

"That’s it you’re finished. What are you gonna do now?" Well ok at least this one is pretty obviously a reference to the critical reception of his career after the Beatles and again after John.

"Uncle Jim" Ok so I guess this is supposed to be his dad, but what is the point of this scene? And why the monkey? The further I get into this film the more I feel like I am looking deep into this man's psyche but through the murkiest of windows. I'm here for the weird dream symbolism, Paul, but if you're gonna go that route, again go full Lynch and get even weirder.

Just the straight up original recording of "Band on the Run" feels out of place with all these re-records. I wonder why that choice.

His car license plate is "PM 1" That's right, baby, you're number 1.

Another little cute but inconsequential day dream (presumably within the dream that is this entire movie). He looks like Roy Orbison here.

Oh ok Harry was just locked in a cupboard this whole time. So the whole "plot" was pointless. Cool cool cool.

Paul and Harry being giddy and laughing together is cute though, and it makes me wish that that relationship was fleshed out more. Who are they to each other, exactly??

Yup it was all a dream. Love it, love that for us. Thanks, Paul.

OK so this was definitely barely a movie. There could have been something here, but I'll go back to what I said above -- I wish he'd gone weirder with the whole thing! And I wish Paul himself had been weirder. The character Paul is kind of a dud, just plodding along from place to place and only coming alive when he performs. It's like that Hawaiian shirt is supposed to be a stand in for characterization. But worth it for the music video scenes and for getting a tiny glimpse into Paul's psyche.

[dragon-communion]

The more of the fandom I see, the more I think people need to read some gothic horror and at least one short story dated before the 2000's.

Characters are not here to be Jesus, they are here to tell a story. Interesting stories usually center on some type of conflict, and that conflict is usually bad for Someone if not Everyone. Many stories in general were just "watch this dude fuck up in every way possible". In fact, there's an entire subclass of narrator called the Observer that exists to have zero personality so we can sit behind his eyes and watch fucked up shit go down (if I recall right, The Great Gastby does this).

While the Tarnished has a bit more agency than a traditional observer character and we end up outright influencing the course of the story, we very much DO show up just to stare at Marika's family drama. That's about as classical as it gets.

For more stories where everyone has a problem and no one is safe, there might be incest, there's usually fucked up immoral sex in general, there's at least one murder, and someone's trying to thematically become God, I recommend:

GRRM's writing because he was involved.

The Bloody Chamber by Angela Carter just because it's really good.

The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde.

Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov.

Let The Right One In by John Ajvide Lindqvist.

Literally any given myth or classical play, but particularly Oedipus Rex and The Bacchae.

The Twilight Zone.

The Warrior Cats series by Erin Hunter.

The Mortal Instruments series by Cassandra Clare.

I, Claudius, both the TV show and the novel by Robert Graves.

You don't have to LIKE the abuse and the violence and the systemic issues and the incest. In fact, that's frequently the entire point. The point is to go "wow that's fucked up" with a side of "how does it turn out, what do they do next?". We like these things for the same reason people watch car crashes and the Victorians watched executions for sport. Fucked up things happen in real life, and reading about them in fiction is interesting.

If you're expecting people to be totally morally correct in a Fromsoft game, you're in the wrong game. If the most thoughtful thing you have to say about Elden Ring is to complain that it's full of incestuous femboy molesters or whatever, I guess it sucks to have bad taste. Do what sparks joy for you and get out of my house, you literally don't have to play it.

[grigori77]

Critical Role, Campaign 3 Episode 107

Thorum? Oh, this'll be interesting ... and HELLO to Marisha's body horror fan ... oh dear ... what's THIS madness? Wow ... this just got weird ... oh, thanks, Robbie ... that's helpful ... meanwhile Matt discovers a freaky new kink ... O.O

Yeah ... advertising by way of David Lynch ... that's about right. Thankfully she's BACK ... oh, TEN YEARS?!!! Awesome ...

Hmmmm ... Sam was kind of adorable there ... XD

The return of Momlan! Yay!

So ... how much shit is still going to go off in here?

Roll for Initiative! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!

D&D maths and lots of rollies ... wow ... and somehow for the first time Orym is stone dead LAST in the order ... even more wow ...

Laudna casts Mirror Image on herself, then FORM OF DREAD!!! YEAH!!! Oh yeah, that's RIGHT, no more Delilah! So she gets to be completely new and fresh and OH MY GOD CRAZY VICTORIAN BANSHEE!!! I love that ...

Chetney charges in and pulls out Ludinus' notes from the Bag, passes them to Fearne, then ... what the hell is he DOING? Brand of Castigation? That's a weird move ... and he deald her 13 points of damage? Seriously, WHAT?!!! I thought you were FRIENDS!!! If this is some kind of plan it's a WEIRD one ...

Braius dashes in to climb in through the window, then Inspires Fearne with his newly painted portrait of her which looks suspiciously like a piece of specially-commissioned promotional artwork ... cute ...

Ludinus' turn ... balls ... Matt asks what Fearne's hitpoints are? Oh THAT can't be good ... she's STUNNED?!!! WHAT THE ACTUAL -- NO!!! Laudna Counterspells and it SUCCEEDS!!! NIce save Marisha Ray you absolute GODDESS!!! WHOOP WHOOP!!! But CRAP ... now he knows she's there, though ... but she's just SPOOKY right now, so ... yeah ...

Ashton dives into the muck and essentially starts SWIMMING AROUND, going for the column ... and prepares to take a swing at it with his hammer? Interesting ...

Fearne heads into the chamber and screams: "DADDY?!!! WE NEED TO TALK!!!" ... okay? Deception check? Hmmm ... oh yeah, Matt is NEVER gonna live "spread your legs" down ... XD ... 24? Oh, NICE ROLL, Ashley! So it actually WORKS!!! Unbelivable ...

Dorian rushes in too and sees the immediate threat to Fearne ... and casts Force Cage around her! Nice ... nick of time, Robbie! And some Bardic Inspiration while he's at it! Nice!

Gloamglut's turn! Crap! It breathes dark fire OVER Fearne's head and it INSTEAD goes at Laudna and Imogen! Crap squared! O.O They dodge but still get singed ... ouch!

Zathuda jumps down and MATERIALISES right behind both our girls! Crap! He attacks with his fancy sword! Laudna Shields, plus she still has her Mirror Image ... but the second catches her ... OUCH!!!

The Emissary drags themselves out of the mire and rushes to Ludinus ... looking for protection like a little bitch, it seems ...

Legendary action for the dragon! Balls! It scratches at Imogen and catches her, but it's just a glancing blow, at least.

Imogen uses Misty Step to bamf ONTO GLOAMGLUT'S BACK?!!! Are you effing KIDDING ME?!!! O.O She attempts to TAKE CONTROL with the reins? Wow ... that is BALLSY ... and she's a horse girl so she has ADVANTAGE at this! Wow ... 20? Holy shit ... she just SAVED HER GIRLFRIEND'S LIFE!!!

Orym really doesn't have a great idea of WHAT THE FUCK is actually going on right now ... so he rushes the best he can to get inside ... he JUST makes it to Fearne ...

Ira slithers in through a window and goes for the Sorrowlord ... okay, then ... and SCARES THE FUCK out of him while he's distracted with Laudna! XD I love that ...

Laudna casts Void Puppet to send a freaky phantom version of her RIGHT THROUGH the Sorrowlord, then casts Blight on him! Sweet! Matt takes a dump on his save so she FUCKS HIM UP ... wow, she has A LOT of dice to roll ... I can't wait for this result ... 40 points of damage! Holy fuck! Oh yeah, that clearly HURTS HIM ...

Chetney risks a slip past the guard and is missed while he goes, thankfully Matt rolls REALLY SHIT there, so he's through and charges for Ludinus, attacking him with his wolfy claws ... A HIT!!! And another hit with e Dirty 20! Nice! 20 and then 18 points of slashing damage for those! Nice ... it hurts him, but not bad yet ...

Braius Misty Steps his way to Ludinus ... now FLANKING hi along with Chet! Sweet ... he attacks with his crazy mace! With a 3rd Level Divine Smite! 40 points of damage! Yeah ... another attack, but that one goes painfully wide ... NUTS!!!

Ira uses a Legendary Action to attack Zathuda! Sweet ...

Ludinus tries to whip the Emissary away with magic but Laudna Counterspells ...only for him to Counterspell right back? Hmmm ... It's a Roll-Off!! O.O Nuts, Ludinus JUST wins that ... great ... now what can they do? He preps but just HOLDS IT in anticipation ... okay, then ...

Ashton pops up out of the mud and CHARGES HIM!!! And he Rages while he's at it ... okay, then ... now he comes in swinging! First is a NAT 20!!! Yes ... with a Chaos Burst! And a charge from the Ring! Right ... how much is this gonna hurt him? A lot of dice math, then ... always promising ... O.O ... 56 + 14 ... which means it BREAKS HIS CONCENTRATION and the spell he was brewing is GONE!!! Yes! Taliesin: "For my NEXT attack ..." XD ... 28 DEFINITELY hits ... 24 points of damage ... HDYWTDT!!! SWEET!!!

Crap ... Ludinus, you sneaky bastard ... the hit triggers an explosion from the clone? Ouch ... but it does envelop the Emissary while it's happening, at least ... but a bunch of them have to make Dex saves ... crap ... O.O ... Braius takes a FULL FUCKING HIT ... ouch ... and now Matt has Ashley rolls a D20 ... oh dear ... at least the ceiling doesn't cave, but it's definitely PRECARIOUS now ...

Fearne bamfs Mister out, tries to use Fiery Teleportation to port herself OUT of the cage ... hmmmm ... Charisma save? Okay ... she pulls it off! Nice ... she materialises by the Emissary and is immediately attacked by one of his guards! Crap ... she tries to convince the Emissary this is all fucked up with the news that Ludinus has been slaughtering fae for power for decades ... and Ashley rolls FUCKING AMAZING on her Persuasion so it DEFINITELY convinces! Sweet!

Dorian dashes up behind Fearne, but takes a blow from one of the guards as he passes ... ouch ... no attack, he's just there to back her up ...

Gloamglut pulls back at Imogen's urging, but it's charging up and there are PLENTY OF TARGETS under it ... crap ... Laura must now make a strength check to contest what it does next ... 13 against a dragon? Oof ... yeah, the dragon UNLEASHES a jet of dark fire on the chamber! CRAP!!! Fuck that's a lot of dice Matt's rolling right now ... O.O

Ira attacks again with another Legendary action ... Ashley rolls shit, and it fails SPECTACULARLY ... great ...

Zathuda makes like he wants to parley ... Insight Check for Laudna! She passes the message on, but VERY CAUTIOUSLY ... meanwhile as the Sorrowlord backs off Ira just ATTACKS HIM ... okay ... Zathuda pulls back and tries to BOLT, giving Laudna an attack of opportunity ... she grabs onto his wrist and Marisha rolls a Nat1 ... oh boy ... yeah, that's a SPECTACULAR fail, he's already gone ...

The Emissary questions the Sorrowlord ... oh, this just got interesting ... is this a standoff or can they talk their way out of this after all?

Imogen tries to speak to Gloamglut with her powers ... oh wow ... this could go SPECTACULARLY wrong ... O.O ... oh, so this will be a contest of wills ... Wisdom roll for Laura, then ... hmmmm ... 15? Oh bugger ... oh, but Matt rolled SPECTACULARLY shite ... it actually WORKS!!! I can't believe it ... she holds Psychic Lance for just in case ...

Orym gracefully makes his way in to pull Bait & Switch with the Emissary ... interesting ... then tries to defuse the situation while simultaneously Hexing Zathuda ... wow ...

Is Ira shit-stirring right now? Or is he just being cautiously smart?

Laudna skitters down the wall into the main chamber ...

Okay then ... looks like it really IS a parley ... Fearne gives the Emissary Ludinus' journal, while Chetney describes what happened in Molaesmyr ... meanwhile it looks like Zathuda's hanging Ludinus out to dray right now ... interesting ... insight check for Fearne ... OH SHIT!!! WHISPERS!!! Cue a WizzKids plug from Sam!

Zathuda tells the Emissary to go, intent on seeing his end through, but maybe now as a ruse instead ... can we actually BUY THIS right now? I don't trust it ...

What does this actually mean for the main plans? Have they just shot themselves in the foot somewhat?

Yeah, Imogen just gets BUCKED RIGHT OFF as Gloamglut lands ... but she starts flying instead so she can catch herself. Okay, then ... so Zathuda's making out that he's their inside man in the Vanguard now ... do we actually BELIEVE HIM right now? I mean this is bullshit, right? I don't trust him ...

Is this all going to go south because Fearne has no interest in going along with THEIR plans for her? Hey, Zathuda, stop talking FOR our girl, she can make up her OWN damn mind!

So ... a deal with the devil, or they're letting them set up against them KNOWING full well the plan moving forward? Or they just go all in right now and try and kill them all RIGHT HERE ... honestly NONE of these choices really sound too great ...

Now we're all positioning for JUST IN CASE this all goes off again after all ... oh boy this is tense no matter WHAT ...

Fearne gives Gloamglut scritches ... right as Imogen Psychic Lances Ludinus? HOLY SHIT ... O.O Meanwhile Orym dashes up Gloamglut's tail and uses Seedling to catch the Emissary with Grasping Vine ... Acrobatics check? Oh, that's child's play for our Wee Man ... with Silvery Barbs from Laudna too that succeeds ... he gets hurt by the drop but now they're got him in their grasp!

And now it's all GOING OFF just like I expected it to ... O.O

Rolling Initiative AGAIN!!! I don't think I can take this fucking TENSION ...

Orym drags the Emissary away, then hits him a few times to try and subdue him without killing him ... he's out cold with just a couple of hits. Okay then, now what?

Imogen Pyshic Lances Zathuda again, this time at 6th Level ... NINE D6 of damage? Holy shit ... 29 points of Psychic damage! Oh my fucking GODS ...

Gloamglut goes for the Emissary ... OF COURSE it does ... O.O ... meanwhile the building is under some SERIOUS strain now ... and the guards are FLEEING now ... as they should, really ... it slashes at Orym with claws and tail ... Orym manages to dodge, but the miss hits the pillar instead ... shit ... yeah, that's it, the pillar is DUST ...

The building is now COLLAPSING ... O.O

Fearne psychically tels everybody to RUN and then climbs up onto Gloamglut ... what the actual FUCK?!!! The dragon's having NONE OF IT so she has to fight for it ... oh boy ... 5 is a SHITE roll ... yeah, that's DEFINITELY not gonna work ...

Chetney BOLTS ...

Braius rushes to Fearne, then casts Thunderweight on her to launch her up onto the dragon's back? Holy fucking shit ... he gives her a little kiss on the booty for Inspiration ... she rolls a Dirty 20 and NOW SHE'S ON THE DRAGON!!!

Ashton dives into the mud and just SHOOTS OUT with impressive speed ...

Dorian rushes to the Emissary, throws them over his shoulder and just teleports them both outside ... NICE!!!

Ira goes into his Nightmare Form ... oh shit! He leaps onto Gloamglut's back, clambers to Zathuda and starts cutting down into him! Holy shit ...

Laudna asks Fearne if she wants the dragon to live, which she DOES, ofcourse she does ... Void Puppet again? Ooooooh ... Disintegrate? Fuck ... if this works it could just straight up MURDER Zathuda on the spot ... Matt PLEASE fail this save ... Silver Barbs! That could help ... oh my gods HOW MANY DICE is she gonna roll right now? Marisha (to Ashley): "Is it okay if I kill your dad?" 81 points of damage? Holy fucking shit ...

Zathuda is now MISSING A LEG and somehow he's STILL ALIVE ... so she just Eldritch Blasts him instead ... only one hits ... 12 points ... oof ... that was SO COOL but it was almost EVEN COOLER ...

Using Seedling Orym tries to yank himself up beside Zathuda ... but Gloamglut resists VIOLENTLY. People are thrown about by the force of iits wings, and Fearne's knocked off its back ... CRAP!!! And after all that Orym STILL doesn't gain purchase after all ... so he just makes another attempt to run up its body ... which ALSO fails, so he just gives up trying to go for Zathuda and instead just starts slashing at the dragon. Hack! Slash! He draws blood both times ...

Imogen uses Telekinesis to try and rip Zathuda away from the saddle ... Strength check! 14? Against 10 that's A WIN!!! He's torn free and dumped RIGHT IN FRONT of Braius ... that deals him 4 D6 of damage! 14 points and he's UNCONSCIOUS!!! Wow ...

All right, NOW what?

Imogen Misty Steps to Laudna ... Gloamglut BARELY manages to squeeze itself out through the same hole it got in through ... FALLING DEBRIS!!! Watch your heads! Time to fucking RUN!!!

Yeah, this is now becoming EXTREMELY complicated and extremely urgent ... people need to just do what they can AS FAST as they can ... meanwhile IMogen's dragging Zathuda out with her Telekinesis ... they have BAREL;Y SECONDS NOW!!! The roof is coming down, people!

Is Braius SERIOUSLY committing desecration on his way out right now? O.O

Singularity Assault? How badly is Ashton going to fuck this all up right now? This sounds like something that could go SPECTACULARLY bad ... wow ... he's REALLY going to punch Chetney right now ... I can't belive he actually DID that ...

I mean TECHNICALLY that does work but it is REALLY UGLY ... O.O

Wait ... Braius and Imogen AREN'T OUT YET when the building collapses? What does that mean?

Seriously, are they okay? And NOW he chooses to call it a break? RIGHT NOW?!!! Matthew fucking Mercer!

Zathuda's first death save? Oh, okay ... meanwhile Ashton's already starting to try and dig them out ... and OF COURSE Laudna is currently FREAKING THE FUCK OUT ...

Dorian's trying to convince the guards that they're not a threat to the Emissary and somehow it seems to work? Crazy ... that was like THE WORST fake-out ever ...

Telepathic Bond! Yeah, try that ...

Wait, what the FUCK is happening right now? The temple is currently REBUILDING ITSELF ... so it's, like ... completely rebuilt now? Crazy ... but at least THEY'RE both okay ...

Thank FUCK for that ...

Braius gives Zathuda a Medicine check ... which COULD actually KILL HIM if it fails ... wow ... this'll be interesting ... so he's stabilised, but thankfully STILL unconscious ... okay then. That's smart ...

They all rush right back inside the temple ...

Well that settles it, then ... that was DEFINITELY the Arch Heart fixing that ...

Matt is LEAVING ... what the fuck ... SOMEONE ELSE is coming instead ... OH HELLO!!! Abubakar Salim is in the house again ...

Oh shit, yeah, it is just GOING OFF right now ...

Ah, I think I get it ... so they're all tripping out in the midst of another spiritual vision like the one Orym had before ... okay then ...

Like I said, this is DEFINITELY the Arch Heart ... oh okay, so he's clearly focusing on Braius right now ... makes sense after THAT exit ...

Look here, Doomseed, there is NOT going to be any talking your way out of this ...

Oh, so that was a BLUFF? SILAHA you sneaky bastard ... XD

A feast? Interesting ... is that actually going to be at all REAL? Are they actually going to gain sustenance from that?

Oh shit ... he sees something specific in Fearne? Interesting ... and now he's noticed it in Ashton too ... yeah, there's definitely something MISCHIEVOUS in this particular god, and I love it ... XD

I'm not at all surprised by Ashton going off on him right now, he's definitely the most primed to react badly to THIS kind of behaviour ...

A vessel ... wait ... is he about to try and turn one of THEM into a Vessel? I'm not sure I like that idea ...

He likes Laudna, of course. I expected he would. I'm not surprised he finds her a little fascinating too.

That's how it is, really. The true heroes are never the ones you really EXPECT to be. They're misfits, troublesome and morally dubious, terribly complicated and in some ways rather problematic, and yet right now they're EXACTLY what this world needs ...

Sacrifices for the greater good ... oh yeah, that shit always sounds great in theory, doesn't it? But in practice it's always messy, and ugly, and often times it's not really worth it in the end ...

Oh, so this isn't really an OFFICIAL meeting, then? He's not doing this with their blessing? That's interesting too ...

What, sacrifice a god to Predathos? You really think THAT'S gonna work? Sounds a bit rudimentary to me ...

Oh hello, Asmodeus ... that's interesting ...

Insight check? SERIOUSLY?!!! Yeah, I don't think 19's gonna cut it, Riegel ...

Nifty little Dawnfather impression ... yeah, you got a good ear for that, Braius. XD

Bit of a dramatic way to make your point there, Orym ... O.O

He is very pretty, yes. I mean he's a literal Starman. That's, like, inherently cool ...

Dorian makes a very interesting point ... although I'm a little worried it might get him smote at the same time ...

Wow ... so are they genuinely gonna go along with this, then?

The guy LITERALLY just yanked a star out the sky. This can't be good ... O.O ... and the star is ALIVE ... great ...

HER?!!! Her who?

Imogen, what the fuck are you doing? Oh shit ...

A smell of winter? What ... okay, where's THIS going?

And now they're all awake again ... and out boy is LEAVING?!!! Shit ... and now Matt's back! Crazy ...

A ring? Is this some kind of new Vestige? THAT'S the end of the episode? Oh, A CARD?!!! Cooooooool ...

Oh wow ... yeah, that does all sound seriously boss ... that is a SERIOUSLY OP'd piece of magical kit, there ...

So that's it. Okay then ... is it Thursday yet?

[spectral-kitkat]

Finished Bodies on Netflix and wow! After the initial mindfuck had worn off and I was able to comprehend everything this series was amazing!

I saw it advertised on fb a while ago and was like “mum I have a new series to watch!”

Spoilers for the next bit if you haven’t seen it

Top 3 favourite characters:

• Karl Weissman/Charles Whiteman:

His one liners and general idgaf attitude were just 😚👌🏻 chefs kiss. He did what needed to be done no questions asked. Need to kill this bitch - done. Need to frame this guy - no problem! No fucks were given and I love him for it! Plus his reluctant “adoption” of Esther made me feel all types of emotions. Their back and forth conversation in the police station was hilarious and I really wished they could’ve gone to Inverness together.

• Alfred Hillinghead:

He gave his life just to close this case and not only that he gave his life to spare the only person he could be his true authentic self with! Give me the “gay closeted victorian romance that leads one of them to die just to protect the other” Pain. That is all. He risked everything to try and solve the murder, his family, his reputation, his job and I respect the hell out of him for it! His love story with Henry was tragically beautiful and I love it! Their final goodbye where Alfred tells him to run knowing that he’s actually going to turn himself in - cinema! That final kiss between them hurts me on such an emotional level I actually feel sick when I think about it! Alfred knew that was the last time he’d ever see Henry and he did not hold back!

• Shahara Hasan:

She was on a mission the entire series and did not let anything stop her! Even finding out that the exact same body was found in 1890 and 1941 didn’t dissuade her. She still went “alright wtf that’s weird but it’s still a murder and I’m gonna solve this bitch!” and then she did! No doubt made harder by the fact her boss was in on it… What a badass! Her future self was no slouch either. She really went from “I need to help this kid who clearly has some mental issues” to “fuck this kid - we need to dismantle everything he’s done” and all this whilst suffering the pain of knowing she could probably have prevented Elias from detonating the bomb and killing half a million people including her own son! Damn woman, you dropped this: 👑

Iris gets a honourable mention since the timeline would never have righted itself if she hadn’t sacrificed her life in 2053 to tell Hillinghead what happened and how he can prevent it. Her jumping into The Throat was the catalyst that started the end to Mannix and his weird fucked up timeloop of a life.

Also props to Tom Mothersdale for lying on the floor naked in the exact same position for godknows how long as various people find him. Especially in 1941 with the rain machine pelting him with cold water

I was also thinking up potential ship names for Alfred and Henry and the only 4 I could come up with are:

- Candid Constable

- HillingAshe

- Alfrey

- PhotoCop/PhotoCopper

Idk if any of them are any good but eh 😂 i tried

[crguang]

I'm actually into architecture and interior design. I was wondering what kind of house we would have with HSR women? Kafka is brutalism! 100%!!! The layout is bold and the material is raw. If you remember that one story quest where Kafka can sense whether we lie or not, I believe trust and honesty is number 1 in Kafka's relationship. So I think brutalism suits her really well. But the interior design screams victorian. Uh sorry, my mind is working a lot rn, I just came back from a concert (more like music installation) that combines music & architecture. Thanks to my lecturer who always drags me to extraordinary events. At least I have a lot of interesting ideas to share with you. Ehe.

As for Yukong, it's more like a Japanese house but in Chinese style. You can feel the "zen" in that house cuz she is searching for solitude. Poor thing, she always has anxiety after that war incident. I believe her house strictly follows feng shui for good luck

Contemporary is suitable for Black Swan. In my mind, I always think BS never lets you have privacy due to her nature as memokeeper. Remember that one time she talked with March 7th? LOL. Glass material is often used in contemporary design, so it feels like the outdoors and inside is connected. Once again, lack of privacy. Like an aquarium LOL

As for Himeko, maybe Cottage. Usually this type of house can be spotted in the countryside. It's simple, small, and warm. I believe she wants to plant some coffee, harvest them, and grind them all by herself. She will even keep a Luwak outside her house ☠️

As for Nat, I think similar to Himeko, mediteranian also suits her really well. Considering she always lives in the underground, I THINK THE BEST HOUSE FOR HER IS MEDITERANIAN. LOTS OF LIGHT!

Acheron... Probably a traditional Japanese house. But I feel like she can even live under the bridge. LOL

Anyway, thank you for not being mad at me.... ʕ⁠´⁠•⁠ ⁠ᴥ⁠•̥⁠`⁠ʔ

-🎹

this is so insanely accurate i have no idea what some of these words mean but the black swan one is insane. like actually crazy i can see it so clearly in my mind her house would totally be designed with lots of glass like that blew my mind… nat finally getting some sunlight after years underground oh my heart. i went to look up brutalist architecture and i see it omfggggg wow its really eccentric and that fits kafka so well. your brain is kinda insane this is such a cool thing to be into

[victorluvsalice]

So. You know all those various ask games where you can ask someone to explain a current WIP, or write three sentences on a fic they're working on and then share them, or similar? Well, we're doing something like that over here, only I am vastly expanding what is on offer. Because while I generally only ever have two WIPs, I have a whole fucking LOT of ideas. So! Here is my mostly-Valicer-AUs-themed ask game for you all:

Send 💬/[conversation bubble] for me to ramble on about any of the below AUs for a bit

Send 🌈/[rainbow] for me to write three+ sentences of either a real or hypothetical fic for the AU

Your choices:

Actual WIPs

-->Londerland Bloodlines (currently working on "Downtown Queensland," but I'm willing to discuss other installments)

-->Valicer In The Dark (currently working on "Start At The Beginning...Sort Of," though I'm extremely willing to get into the VITD universe as a whole)

Things I Have Previously Discussed On Here

-->Modern AU Valicer (aka the source of most of those Not-Incorrect Quote things I did for a while)

-->Valicer Soulmates AU

-->Ever Ever After (that Four Victorians Riding A Roller Coaster fairytales AU -- yes, I came up with a title for the damn thing)

-->The Hypothetical Valicer Forgotten Vows AU

-->The Three-Player Childhood Friends Valicer In AMA AU (or, frankly, anything related to Smiler's Otherland stuff)

-->Fallout of Darkness (yes, this is actually still around! I am still playing Fallout 4 and making notes on it! I'm up to the point in the main questline where Victor has to hunt down a Courser, which he is doing as he completes the Mechanist questline)

-->This Hypnokinky Fantasy-Medieval Valicer One-Shot From OT3 Week (heed the hypnokinky there! It's not EXPLICIT explicit but it's fairly open about what's about to happen to Victor at the end)

Deranged AUs That Only Lived In My Brain -- UNTIL NOW

-->Dinner For Three, a Valicer AU based on the horror comedy film The Menu (I actually just came up with that title, despite how obvious it is)

-->Infinite Loops-Style Valicer AU (inspired by me finding the TV Tropes page for that series and going "wow, Corpse Bride would have a really short loop if it followed the time period that we saw in the movie...")

-->Valicer Changeling: The Lost AU (I've discussed Valice versions of this waaaay in the past, but this is a new Valicer variant that would be set in the modern day)

-->Some Thoughts On A BITD Smiler In Beneath A Broken Sky (not a full AU since the fic that it's based off of isn't complete yet -- this is just me with some ideas I came up with where a Smiler from a BITD-based world without a local Victor and Alice gets yeeted into the BABS setting -- oh, and the fic itself isn't visible unless you're logged into AO3, just fair warning)

-->The New Severance (Apple TV) AU That Is Strangling My Brain (this is ALL @penny-anna's fault, go read Welcome To The Panopticon, it is FASCINATING and gives me Valicer AU ideas for a show I've never even WATCHED)

There. Choice. Enjoy.