#yea i'm here again

[sxcret-garden-archive]

currently really struggling between "I wanna do so much for my readers and write for them and make stuff I know they'll enjoy <3" and "idgaf I'll write solely for my own entertainment because 95% of people here don't even know what a fucking reblog button is"

[findmeinthefallair]

"It's been a year, I feel so heavy... Mama, will this feeling ever stop?"

“Mijo. It hurts. But you have so many people who love you. We can help you carry that feeling and one day it might not feel as heavy.”

(Dialogue by @childlikegoblinqueen, with some smol additions by me)

[mar-marmallu]

Shape/anatomy practice ft. The Nesties

[keeps-ache]

i wanna be able to use these so lol :)

[comfysofti]

Continuing my rambling about my personal dungeon lord Kabru,,,

Will link my other post(s) related to this in the end

Anyways

Rambling below

Take it as you will (♡˙︶˙♡)

Regarding my dungeon lord Kabru, important to mention that he didn't met Canaries later on, like he did in the manga. He did successfully conquered the dungeon, while the Canaries were only getting to it. A lot of things would definitely go differently because of this, but I don't focus on them as of now

It would definitely take Kabru some time to actually defeat Thistle and go this deep in the dungeon with his party to actually reach him. Especially considering the fact that his party, Unlike Touden party, probably wouldn't get any help from winged lion, which would make progression deeper in the dungeon more challenging(that's just some thoughts and possible scenario, since my dungeon lord Kabru doesn't exactly conquers the same dungeon that we see in dungeon meshi)

But that's besides the topic

Once Kabru would take over the dungeon, the first thing he would definitely do is get everyone out of the dungeon, since he himself, refers to the dungeon as growing organism and adventurers as it's nutrition. He would follow with his original plan of sealing off the dungeon, and getting people out of there(essentially "starving it"), and then just waiting or destroying the dungeon himself(although this would likely lead to the demon escaping in either scenario). I don't think he would exactly destroy it himself, and would just rather wait for it to wither away on it's own, since it would give him more time to get accustomed to the powers that his new position brings, and to make sure that absolutely everyone is out of there. His party included. Although i can definitely see them arguing over him forcing them to leave, and him explaining that it's for their own safety and better good

But once this done, what then? I spend some time thinking what Kabru would be doing, all alone in that dungeon, after getting everyone out and "sealing the dungeon off". He would get bored over time, especially with demon and dungeon monsters being his only company. Of course, he could make doppelgangers of his friends, especially with how much he knows about people, he could make such accurate doppelgangers, that he himself wouldn't be able to tell them apart from real people. But they're only based on his memories, and will never change, unlike real people. And demon as we saw, has plenty of negative effects on persons psyche. Like Thistle for example, was originally just wishing to protect his beloved kingdom and people he cherished the most, but demon turned this into obsession over getting Delgal back, barely caring about how people of the kingdom feel about his acting. Pure desire turned into something like this. Rotten fruit, from pure tree

Similar thing would happen with Kabru, but demon would mostly exploit Kabru's love over learning about fellow humans. We, by nature, are social creatures. Loneliness affects us more than we might think. It affects our psyche and needs, affects how we function, ect. And I don't think for Kabru, demon's company would be enough

Kabru could try to dig as deep in himself as he could, trying to find things that he buried deep in his mind, or would try to do the same with the demon, unsuccessfully of course

This would definitely affect him more and more over time, making him more paranoid and desperate for some human company, touch, affection, anything. Any company that wasn't him, his thoughts and that damned demon. He would definitely at some point, would be so deprived of any human interactions that he would turn to making doppelgangers or trying to create life, that as close to humans as possible, in attempt to not go insane completely, but that would fail too

All this just wouldn't be real. It would just make him spiral into loneliness, and with demon eating and disturbing his other desires he would solely focus on filling this void for human interaction. Learning about them. Dissecting them, but being unable to. Because he himself, did this. Isolated himself, in attempt to get everyone to safety. To prevent another Utaya from happening

And yes, he succeeded but at what cost? At cost of his life and sanity. And then desires

I don't think Kabru would be sad or scared over getting his desires eaten. I think even as something as this, by that point, would be like heaven. Because he would feel like he's needed and cherished by someone, in this weirdest way possible. He would finally get at least some physical contact, even if it's not from something human, at least this being was trying to act as humanly as possible. And It's touch, albeit painful, still shows need for him. Even if in reality it's just hunger for his only desire left:

To understand humans and what they want. So close but also out of his reach, forever unfulfilled

This would be only desire left because his other, greater desire to prevent destruction caused by dungeon and Canaries, was fulfilled years ago. Who knows how many years ago by that point. So there was only one desire left, that essentially, part of our most primal need: connection with other human beings

He would die with it being forever unfulfilled. He would die alone in that dungeon once it collapses, his corpse forever buried deep within it's remains

But at least, he prevented another tragedy. Probably

Links to my two other posts regarding my dungeon lord Kabru: here and here

Thanks for reading my rambling <33

[plugnuts]

CYBER AU PART FOUR: PROGRAM

PREVIOUS | START | NEXT

Panels under the cut:

[raiiny-bay]

finished dhes & kel's character pages so here are the lil edits i made for both of em :-)

[uptownhags]

i just need to ??? about a man

[grandtreeangel]

Pete for Rock Sound Issue No. 300 (2023)

[redemn]

i am severely lacking in   'plot where arthur is actually caught and bound by an authority figure / muse adjacent to the law or justice ,   and the premise is arthur trying to escape in increasingly more obnoxious ways until the other muse gets really tired of him'   and i think that's a shame .

[lizzerswillpoststuffmethinks]

Spoiler: I didn't go to sleep. But I will shortly after this post

[thsc-confessions]

"I'm worried about controversial stuff coming up about this ship opinion situation, but here we go-"

"I dislike Toppat Henry x Charles/ Henry x Toppat Charles, especially that second one. The artwork I see of it (especially Toppat Charles x Henry, not so much on the other option) leans into toxic relationships for me and I dislike it heavily."

"As much as I love Henrles (tied with Polythreat for me), that situation of "Enemies to lovers" is the one type of Henrles ship that just.. turns me the wrong way unfortunately.." submitted by anon

[icedmetaltea]

Me: oh boy the doctor referred me again and I'm sure this place will be able to sign this simple one-page form for me so I can get food agai-

The referral place: sorry lol you have to come in person even tho you have crippling agoraphobia

[mummer]

"sara snow" as if that could have ever been a real name. get real. That is a drag name

[keeps-ache]

i have a new hobby!! i listen to my playlist and say things like 'oh this goes hard' 'it just can't miss' 'it's so good, you have no idea' to my brother who cannot listen to it bc i am wearing headphones lmaoo

[perilegs]

being homesick and changing as a person so much the place you grew up in isn't your home anymore is such a core part of ati and upon further inspection i think i was projecting a little