#yeah thats literally computer programming

[gikairan]

In a modern fantasy setting, magic users would be the most desirable computer programmers and you can't convince me otherwise

[crazy-hazy-sims]

PLEASE READ THE UPDATE AND THE REPLIES AND THE LAST REBLOG BEFORE I TURNED OFF REBLOGS BEFORE ACCUSING ME OF SPREADING MISSINFORMATION!!!! this post was written before steam realized they had the wrong tags on i agree though pirate EA games <3

As someone who knows alot about piracy please Pirate the sims 1 and 2 because the new rerelease has denuvo tacked onto it and that mf will kill your computers and drain your wifi

let me explain what denuvo is

in short its "anti cheat" code thats only purpose is to complicate the game code so badly that it makes it near impossible for pirates to reverse engineere the game and pirate it, ofc this is not true and Pirates can crack many versions of denuvo it just takes time

so essentially it does nothing but ruin your computer

how?

This extra slop code is integrated into the code of the game so it runs every single time you launch the game and on top of the code slop that games are made of that make your compute heat up and use up ram denuvo code is running ON TOP, using more ram AND internet, forcing offline games to go fully online When the games previously didnt need an internet connection at all.

It has been proven so many times that it cause issues from longer load times to frame rate drops, denuvo's code slows everything down and almost always performance improves by like 50% after denuvo is removed by developers.

There are games that were completely unplayable like they wouldn't even launch because of denuvo, and the company claims this is not their fault and that people should upgrade their computers so this wont happen.. yeah right

Essentially with the reveal that EA didn't fix anything about the sims 1 and 2 and just released them as is but with denuvo attached they literally sold you code to keep you Connected to their servers and force you to not be able to share anything with anyone and forcing the games to preform 50 times worse than their 25 year old selves...

So please dont buy a program that will kill your computers and ruin your games and allow EA to be permanently Connected on your computer thats posing as the sims 1 and 2!!!!

Please please just pirate these 2 games!

Also even though sims 4 is free also Pirate that shit its not worth paying over 1k dollars in dlcs when hslf od them do not work

Update the denuvo tag on steam was a mistake on EAs part it has been confirmed that they dont have it (proof in the REBLOGS) my point still stands though :

PIRATE EA GAMES PEOPLE its literally the better choice for your poor computers

[hayesflint]

as someone who cant even make a stick figure, i have, like, literally the dumbest question

when you say you “paint” (as in the kallzeb cover you just posted) are you painting on a canvas with paints and a brush? then upload?

or are you painting digitally? and if so, is there some kind of stylus you use? bc im assuming its not touch screen. but clearly i do not know.

🙃

thats a great question, yeah!

so the kalluzeb covers are digitally painted. i use a program called Krita and a wacom drawing tablet:

mines a very old school one haha, i got it back in 2014, but it has pressure and tilt sensitivity to replicate traditional painting very well. but the newer models are touch screen! you can get whole computers dedicated to touch screen digital painting now, its incredible.

i say painting because it refers to the style of art im making, and the techniques i use is the same is painting with real paints, as opposed to calling it an illustration or a drawing, which is a different style of artwork.

my screen will look something like this while im working

i do paintings with real brushes and paints sometimes! but i enjoy the flexibility of digital painting alot as well.

thanks for the ask! i hope this answers your question :)

[etherealspacejelly]

you quit your software engineering job to pursue environmental science?? do tell!

(i have a software engineering job. it makes me sad.)

so when i was like. 10. i had this teacher who taught us basic scratch programming. and i was like. freakishly good at it. i picked it up super quickly and was even helping the other students to fix their problems. and so he said to me "you know, you could be a great computer programmer one day" and i was like. yeah! i could!

so throughout highschool my One and Only goal was to become a software engineer. every time i went to the career counsellor thats what i said. so i did computer science at gcse, and got a 9, and i did computer science at a level and got an A*. (i did other subjects too of course. but those were the ones i was focussed on)

then i finished my a levels and i went straight into looking for an apprenticeship. no one was really interested in me because i didnt have any experience or a degree. so then my dad got me an internship with some guys he knew at a company that worked in his building, and i managed to build up some actual industry skills. then i got an apprenticeship! it paid super well and the team was great and it was work from home.

and i hated it.

i was just sitting in my room at my dads house 9-5 mon-fri writing code all by myself. it was lonely and boring and i didnt really know what i was doing. it was supposed to be an apprenticeship but it just felt like a job. they didnt teach me how to do anything they just said "do this and come to me if you run into a problem". half the time they didnt even give me any work to do for days at a time so i was just watching youtube or scrolling on tiktok. which sounds great but it wasnt because i felt guilty the whole time and was terrified of being found out and fired, even tho it wasnt my fault? they literally werent giving me work to do?

anyway. a few months into it i was like man Fuck this. im going to university. so i started looking at courses. it actually started with astrophysics, but since i didnt take a science at a level i didnt have the requirements for that. then i found environmental science! it was all the stuff im passionate about: climate change, conservation, natural processes and earth science. so i worked on my application letter and applied, and i got in!

so i went to my boss and was like hey. im putting in my notice. i got into university. and they were like "oh noooo we're so sad to see you go :( you were doing so well and we were so pleased with your work and your progress :(" (and i was like. huh?? i literally didnt fucking do anything. but oh well.)

so i worked until the end of my 6 week notice and then i handed my stuff back in and left. i had a bit of a summer vacation and then started uni! and ive been here for just over a year now :)

its honestly so much better. i have so many new friends, i got to move out of my mums house, im in full control of my life.

so take this as your reminder that its never too late! you can always change your path.

you are in control.

[cephaloclod]

i had a thought today

what if there was a robot girl and she had a crush on you and you knew it and she was trying to ingratiate herself to you so she offered to run some of your computer programs for you on her cpu cuz haha why not haha and youre like aww thanks so you boot up your virtual doll game of choice (im talking ffxiv but you can use whatever in ur dumb brain) and download a bunch of modded clothes and start taking up all her spare memory and shes like uuuuh hehe thats a lot of mods… and youre like lol yeah i wanna try on a bunch of stuff and shes like haha yeah lol… and shes all nervous cuz you keep downloading more and more and she doesnt wanna tell you to stop obvs so shes just going along with it and then you get in the game and crank up the r-shade to the highest settings and you hear her fans kick on to overdrive and shes like uuuh whats up and youre like oh just taking a few quick pics of my heavily modded character haha i wont be long and her fans are getting louder and faster and you can see shes already getting hotter but shes still being nice and doesnt wanna seem mean so you start trying on all the modded clothes and taking a ton of different screenshots and ofc its like all horny big tiddie stuff cuz like thats the fun so shes just getting her already limited memory space spammed by whats turning out to be hundreds of super high fidelity high res screen shots of a hornily/scantily clad big boobed fat assed virtual character and shes like getting really overheated now but like soooo much of her cpu is being used to run this game and at all the highest settings with all those fancy shaders and all that junk so shes like struggling to keep it together and she cant really say much except make loud fan noises as you just sit there and spam her with more and more ridiculous pics at ridiculous angles of your character and her memories almost full but youre still taking more and she finally manages to squeek out something like a maybe we should take a breather for a second but youre like oh but im almost done and my character is just so much fun to take screencaps of and is soooo hot and shes just like yyeeahfh as you take like five more pics of ur toons ass and now the game is running really slow so its taking even longer to set up the shots to take the pictures and the computer girl is just like treading water in this lagged overheated state staring at your beloved characters huge modded rack as you try on another new shirt and realize you wanna go back and see what it looks like with those tights from earlier and she still just doesnt wanna say anything to inconvenience you and maybe this is a good way to die anyway she thinks well thinks is a strong word cuz like 99% of her cpu is being used to render the exposed midriff of your virtual cat girl or whatever it is so she just kinda feels it and the room you two are in is like getting really hot cuz shes just producing so much heat and you can see shes struggling to keep it together and the game is chugging alone reeeeeeeeal slow now and ur just like only a few more outfits im almost done and honestly you kinda would be annoyed but you know shes doing her best and you know it and atm she cant even really respond except to keep her fans going full blast so you like zoom in on your lizard girl or whatevers cleavage and just give her a good eyeful for a couple seconds knowing its literally taking up basically 100% of her processing power at this point and youre like thanks for doing this i loooove my character soooo much shes just soooo hot haha and just so great

[cosmo-production]

mario + rabbids incorrect quotes vol:2

*The Squad is on a hike* RL: It’s beautiful out here. peach: And quiet. RL: Too quiet. peach: Did we lose someone? *cut to edge with a bear in a headlock*

peach: Rabbid luigi is a perfect cinnamon scone who’s never done anything wrong in their entire life! RM: Never done anything wrong?! They set a city block on FIRE!

mario & RR:*Playing video games* peach: You guys woke up at 5:30 in the morning just to play games? mario: *silence* RR: *silence* peach, finally figuring it out: ...You two never went to sleep, did you? mario & RR in shame: Yeah...

peach: Okay, what does A stand for? RL: Arson. peach: Aw, you're so good. Okay! B! What does B stand for? RL: Barson. mario: *laughter* peach: What stands for C? RL: Commit arson. mario: Oooo.  peach: D! RL: Don't come near me, I'm going to commit arson. mario: *more laughter*

RM: We are gathered here today because someone- *glares at luigi’s coffin* -couldn’t stay alive!

Computer: Please enter a password. Rm: *types in edge* Computer: Your password is too weak. Rm: How f?$$ing DARE YOU-

RP: Yeah, but let's not get too crazy. *The gang proceeds to get arrested for blocking the road in large traffic cone costumes

RM, trying their first ever cup of coffee: I am ENERGY! peach, an avid coffee drinker, on their twelfth cup of the day: Someone slap me awake or I am literally going to fall into a coma in ten seconds.

RM: Come on edge, do it for our friendship. You can't put a price on that... edge: Yes I can, 8 dollars.

mario: If you put a milkshake in one yard and crack open a cold one in another yard, which yard would the boys go to? RP: Schrödinger's boys. luigi: MARIO WTH RL: What about cracking open a cold milkshake? RM: As we all know, the milkshake brings the boys to the yard. The presence of the boys is a prerequisite for the cracking open of a cold one, but cold ones do not have any inherent boy-attracting abilities. Milkshakes, however, do. RM: All else being equal, the boys would proceed to the milkshake yard. While it is possible to announce the presence of cold ones in the hope of attracting some boys, the pull of the milkshake is much more powerful by comparison. mario: ... RP: ... luigi: ... RL: ... RM: Mind you, all of this nonsense hinges on whether or not the boys are back in town.

peach, teaching RP to drive: Okay, you're driving and mario and RM walk into the road. Quick, what do you hit? RP: Oh, definitely RM. I could never hurt mario. peach, massaging their temples: The brakes. You hit the brakes.

RM: Your lover doesn't have the mental strength to caramelize onions. RL: Your lover thinks it takes 5-10 minutes to caramelize onions. luigi: Who's caramelizing onions? Have you sociopaths forgotten that apples exist? RM: Do you think caramelizing onions is putting caramel on onions?

hold on stop the quotes for a second, THATS NOT HOW IT WORKS!? caramelizing doesnt mean putting carmel on it? I've been calling caramelizing when I put caramel on ice cream

back to regular program~

RM: As usual, RM has to save the day! edge: As usual, edge has to hear about it

peach: That’s the key slice of truth we need to complete the entire truth pie. RR: Ooh, can we get some actual pie? peach: I like the way you think.

mario: *shatters a window and climbs through it* mario: *turns around and helps RL through it* Breaking and entering is wrong RL. RL: Okay.

edge: All of your existences are confusing. The Squad: How so? edge: Your presence is annoying, but the thought of anything bad happening to any of you upsets me.

peach, texting group chat: What flavour of ice cream do you guys want? I’m at the store so be quick! RL: Moose Tracks is good! RR: What the bawh is that!? RL: *Gasp* How dare you insult moo- RR: No. No no not that. What the hell. Why do you spell flavor like flavour. It’s like you have flavor but then this guy shows up and is like “Oui Oui Would you like chocolate flaVOUR or vanilla flaVOUR. peach and RL: what? RR: I don’t get it why add the EXTRA u when it’s PERFECTLY FINE AS IT IS!? peach: You done now? RR: Yeah ok. peach and RL: ... RR: ...Can I have the Mint Chocolate chip flavour?

*RM and RR are fighting* edge, taking aspirin: I have a headache! Can you guys just be cool?! *RM and RR start fighting while wearing sunglasses and riding skateboards*

RP: What the hell is wrong with you? RM: I have this weird self-esteem issue where I hate myself but still think I’m better than everyone else.

RM: *spits mouthful of blood onto floor* You’ve become far more powerful since we last crossed paths. Dentist: Please stop, there’s literally a sink right next to you.

mario, opening a Capri Sun: Guess I'll drink my sorrows away.

peach: Would it be discrimination to only hire employees at my doughnut shop who have the same name? RP: Legally, I don't believe that breaches any discrimination laws. Morally though... I don't know. peach: I believe god is on my side when it comes to Duncans' Doughnuts.

edge: Let's all agree that going up the stairs on all fours is actually the best experience on earth. RR: Conversely, going down the stairs on all fours is actually the most terrifying experience on earth.

[kirby-the-gorb]

reply roundup!

man apparently these are still hard even when I'm not Literally Dying anymore :v

the sad sale went great, thank you for all the support everyone <3 I bought shelves and makeup and paper star papers and stickers and a new blanket, plus it's helping cover my allowance until my wife starts getting paid. I am already thinking I might do another sale in november just for fun lol

my wife has started orientation at her program and she's having a great time, our partner and I are gonna go down to visit her in a couple weeks :) I also finished rearranging all my furniture now that her furniture isn't here and it only made me terribly ill once!

I am really enjoying everyone singing along on [live and learm], I love enthusiasm <3

on [stars] @korattata said: HEY THATS WHAT I'VE BEEN DOING ALL DAY!!!!! i just started learning last night! its a nice break at work to stop looking at the computer screen. they all still look a bit wonky and i think one of the sheets of paper is too thick but i'm just using paper i got from the supply closet and cut with the paper cutter lol

aw that's so cool! the ones that are like actually packaged for making paper stars are usually a bit thinner than printer paper, like other origami paper, but that also means they tear a lot more easily in the first step if you're not careful, so it's always a tradeoff. what a fun coincidence :>

on [hallway] @thesilentpotato said: the first thing i thought of was the "da dee la da dee la da" krabby patty zoom in scene from spongebob

lol I hadn't thought of that until you said it but you're so right (she is referencing [this scene] from the krusty krab training video for anyone unfamiliar)

(side note thank you to folks who put pronouns in easily findable places so I can refer to you correctly even if I don't know you <3 )

on [birthday] @joekingv1 said: *asks baby what gifts they received and if they would like to read/watch Komi Can't Communicate*

I never really got into komi because one of the side characters really squicks me out, but I have a friend that really loves it, so maybe they've watched it with her! I think they probably got to go somewhere fun for their birthday like a theme park or a zoo, and get a souvenir plush while they were there -u-

on [sheep] @ceylonsilvergirl [added] a different line for kirby, which I still think about regularly lol

on [pills] @minty-spice said: op i hope your health improves and your empire of pills eventually shrinks

thank you <3 honestly I'd be happy with just the first one, I don't mind all the pills so much as long as they're actually helping.

on [crackers] @amatsuki said: made a bunch of cold noodles today with cucumber carrot chicken & sesame peanut soy sauce. the only actual cooking i had to do was boil water and steam chicken

oh hell yeah cold noodles are a fantastic example of a basic food to go feral over. now I want noodles too.........

on [thinking] @adrawrable said: hope you're cozy op

not right now as I type this because it is Computer Work Time, but in general I am So Cozy these days, I have a whole queen bed to myself so it's full of big stuffed animals and fluffy blankets :) (tbh even once my wife moves back here we may just all have individual beds we all seem very comfy this way lol)

on [slam] @jeaniechibi said: we'll be right back ➡️ shshgdtsudtdidh why is every bit of art with a blurr effect so damn funny 🤣

it truly is, I love a thoughtfully applied motion blur (or perspective blur can be funny too) (altho tbh I don't use the perspective blur tool for those I just use separate layers and gaussian blur) (for anyone unfamiliar this is a reference to the eric andre show meme)

on [beehive] @galacticnova3 said: me @ wasp nests minus the frowning, little fellas doing their little fella activities. sometimes they squabble. the thinking man’s reality tv drama

true, true, gotta love little fella activities. personally I feel better observing from a safe distance, but we had a lot of wasps around my childhood home and I didn't really know how to get friendlier than not actively making them mad lol

anonymous asked: That profile is amazing

for some reason I don't feel like I understand, but thank you!

on [sale] @milkymoon-ramblings said: gahh why do so many people have so many cool probducts, the queers are tempting me with their cool swag. however I need to save money for my own cool swag (digital art)

I just love the phrase "the queers are tempting me with their cool swag", so relatable lol (also no worries to anyone who couldn't or didn't want to buy anything, it's not like I needed it to pay bills I just wanted treats :v )

on [solstice] @jaune-chat said: Definitely, the sun can fuck right off. I break into a rash if I get too much sun, and I can't walk outside without full body coverage to some degree or be itching for WEEKS! In order of preference, is fall, winter, spring, summer.

oof yeah my mom gets a bad rash from sun exposure too! I'm fortunate to not have that specific symptom, but dang it seems so inconvenient, especially if you're also sensitive to heat so being covered up puts you at additional risk. personally I rate winter a little higher than fall but otherwise yeah total agreement lol

on [rollerskates] @nexus-nebulae said: @ prev tags i used to daydream constantly about being able to roller skate everywhere because i would constantly think 'rolling would be way easier than dragging my feet everywhere rn' and it took me two months of constantly thinking about that before i realised OH i need a ROLLATOR that would help (<- i am not smart) i haven't actually tried roller skating bc i don't own skates but i have used a skateboard briefly and that also feels better than walking. i wonder.... if the roller skating rink nearby would allow me to use a rollator in the rink with skates on........ probably not lmao

honestly it takes so much to actually realize like "oh a mobility aid might help with this" which is like, a bad thing, but we're just gonna focus on the funny part for now happy disability pride month :v and tbh I think maybe they might let you do it??? cuz like at ice skating rinks they usually have those little penguins or just straight up plastic lawn chairs for people to support themselves on, so I don't think it would be that crazy to go out on the rollarink with a rollator? but also that's just me and I do not run the place or get paid minimum wage to keep people from breaking the place sooo lol

[neutrallyobsessed]

obviously u like topher x joan but how far does it really go? just curious cuz ur always making fanart and even fanfiction about them

Yeah, drawings, drabbles, edits, comics, collages, smut, videos, everything two dimensional I can manage! when I get a better computer with a good video editing software and a animation program it's all over for y'all~~♥!

I FUCKING SHIP IT WOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ♡ww♡

What made you ship it?

I fell down the "this is a pretty funny ship" to "hol up this actually makes a lot of sense, this ship kinda fire" to "these motherfuckers have consumed my every thought and its GREAT!!!" pipeline xdd.

The more I thought about it, the better it sounded, the more ideas I had, EVERYTHING CLICKS SO PERFECTLY WTFFF

It do be like a sliding scale with me in the middle approving a het ship with Joan where sliding negative leads her with Confucius and sliding positive she ends up with Topher lolxd

What are your favorite things about the ship?

WHERE TO BEGIN!!!!! Well, they are terrible people and can always get worse, either doing shenanigans and bothering everyone in the process or just ignoring everyone to be in their own world~~

Age gap, people. It might be a technicallity but they do be 20 years apart and thats like, the best thing ever and the OW/YM strikes again so it's EVEN BETTER!!!!! And with their unconvencional tastes, they'd have A LOT of stuff to share and talk about and teach and learn and they could have so much fun with their niche lil hobbies and references that nobody but them could get and memes that could scar the average angloparlant for life!

And they both have this,,, love for nostalgia (not as apparent in topher, ill concede that its more of a hc) so reminiscing about the past or catching up with things they never lived could be so themmm and so fun to explore~~!!

To bring back something I said earlier, I also really dig the isolation of it all. How Joan feels betrayed by everyone but Topher is there to give her all the attention and devotion that she wants. I haven't decided if they'd finish school or drop off earlier but they do feel like a couple that could ride into the sunset to never be seen again as they build a new life for themselves~~.... it's just that after what happend, I don't see her going back to her old and new friends, but I totally see Topher manipulating all that he can to keep it that way, including Joan. They do be having some unhealthy clinginess towards each other and that's soooo damn good >w<

And yeah, I like Topher getting positive female attention, he looks cute when he likes girls and whoever said that they turned Joan into y/n was so right she really is very easy to project to x_v

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

That's the fun part! As the Queen of Joanpher, is everyone else the who may have an unpopular opinion, my word is law and the other 3 shippers are pretty much in similar Joanpher wavelengths. It is a very instinct ship, ya either get it or ya don't. I don't care and don't have to care bout what non shippers have to say btw 737

Joanpher tastes like: EVERYTHING!! I have eaten so many delicious foods, of many flavors and textures, and when it's Good I go uff si esto es muy joanpher =w=~ but if I had to pick one dish, it'd be The Brochette! Anything you can cook in a stick and directly on the fire cause it's hot as hell~♡! Any type of meat, any kind of vegetable, oil, sauce, sugar, salt, caramel, tender, crunchy, mushy, firm, literally all!! The most important part is that it must be eaten out of the metal stick, like gnawing meat out of the bone, cause it's both raw and wild plus ~elegant and sophisticated~

[polyhexian]

Reply too big to keep in replies, forgive me

Flash emulation won't actually work with the way the site is coded. It's really difficult to truly illustrate HOW fucked the site is if you aren't familiar with it.

So the flash games are INTEGRATED into the site. They don't just play. They send scores and those scores are validated by the site and then affect the game in real time by awarding points. Thats backend stuff and it seems EASY. But flash EMULATION will not really let that process work. Not blanket. Ruffle is a browser add on for flash and you can play some games with it but every game has needed to be worked manually and individually to try and get it to play correctly and to let it send scores.

Here, so like. Last year you may recall having heard about the data breach. It was a long time coming. Neopets has terrible security and always has. So someone got backend access, downloaded the server and this had all of the usernames and passwords ever used. Were they hashed? Yes. Was the hashkey stored in the server and thus also available to the hacker? Also yes.

As a result neopets finally moved from http to https. Great!

Not for flash games.

Every game has links in it right. Backend stuff. Mechanics. But all those fucking links redirect to http, not https. And you cannot change that without editing the game and you can't do THAT without a program that makes flash elements. So they're basically unfixable on site. On one fell swoop, every single flash game broke at once. You could play them but scores were now unsendable.

The workaround neopets USERS found was, I shut you not, using developer tools to modify the way your entire computer communicates with the internet

"oh, that seems simple"

Look the fuck at what is IN the js file

It is 538 lines! It is manually overriding the links used in these games. This IS hacking. Technically this is against the rules, it's just not being enforced.

Don't worry, I'm terrified.

The workaround before this STILL had you download a new browser, modify it, take your internet offline and manually reinstall an old version of flash to create a jury rigged flash browser. Oh my God this is so dangerous and we Still do this. Did I do all this fiddler stuff? Yes! I did! Because neopets is very much like transformers in that there is a small user base but every single person there is fucking insane!

So.... Emulation is not a solution. Every game needs to be individually ground up REMADE in html5. And you can't just import the old game and tweak it. It has to be made from scratch. That's why there are so few html5 games. It's incredibly difficult and time consuming and probably not all that worth it when there's so much to be done.

This is what I mean when I say the site is virtually unplayable. This is the kind of shit that we have to do to make the site work. You basically cannot play unless you are accessing fan sites and communities to find resources that can offer fixes to everything that is broken. There are legitimately pages of this website that have not been updated since 1999. Until like two years ago you still could not say "gay" on the forums because the chat filter caught it. And do you know why?? Staff literally did not know where the chat filter was stored in the backend. They could not find it. The site traded hands and staff so much that no one remained who knew where it was.

There is LITERALLY a guy who found backend access several years ago and can, whenever he wants, get into the server and look at everything. HE could have stolen those passwords (which the other hacker was selling for $10,000!!) At any time he wanted. Instead he just made an anonymous reddit account where he would post info about how the fucking site works and why things are broken and "yeah they lied about fixing this its still broken" or "yeah actually they secretly shadowbanned a bunch of people from submitting scores to the big yearly event next year if you dm me I can tell you if you're on the list"

And he IS STILL THERE!!!! HE STILL HAS SERVER ACCESS!!! ITS BEEN YEARS AND THEY HAVENT KICKED HIM OUR BECAUSE THEY STILL HAVENT FOUND THE BREACH!!!!!!!

This. THIS is what staff is dealing with. THIS is the absolute shit storm they need to tackle if they want this site to work. The way pets are stored, the way accounts work, all of those things cannot be changed without causing severe issues conflicting with users accounts, pets, items, and all of that was originally coded in 1998/1999 and it cannot be changed. It cannot be modernized. They need to find ways to integrate old code that cannot be changed into a site coded for a modern internet. That is beyond the scope of normal site building.

All that is to say... I'm hesitant to believe things will improve, not because I don't think staff wants to, not because I don't think they have the drive and the passion to throw everything they have at it. Just because... Jesus dude I don't know if they actually have the resources to fix this mess at all.

[llatimeria]

omg people are literally so fucking scared about the term "AI" that they will just say incorrect shit. like have you ever played chess against a computer. do you understand how decision making algorithms work. quickly

LITERALLY!!!! oh my God the AIs that play video games and whatnot are NOT the kind of AI this site likes to rail against, either; StackRabbit, as far as I'm aware, did not scrape hundreds of thousands of art galleries without consent to learn to play tetris. it is just a computer program, and I really don't think it's hurting anyone. A tetris bot is not the goddamn harbinger of the AIpocalypse, ffs. AI is just a tool, like a hammer, and yeah you can use hammers to crush people's skulls but you can also use them to build houses. so. Like. I don't mind the idea of people engineering hammers to do be really useful to build houses and sometimes the way to incentivize that is to make a hammer that can build a playground.

I think the funniest thing about that reply is actually the fact that 9/10 they'd be right. A lot of people hear the term "tool-assisted" and think "Oh, an AI did it" when it is definitely not that and this is a legitimate headache for a lot of TASers, and speedrunners in general, since most real-human-hand runners respect tool-assisted speedruns and the people who make them. That was even My Own Personal First Impression Of TASes when I first learned about them, but instead of having a knee-jerk "omg thats cheating u cheater!!!!!!" reaction and shutting down the conversation I kept listening and now I know what TASes are and want to do them myself

It's not like they'd possibly know this because I don't post about my interest in technical gaming very much but trust me the tetris thing was not my first brush with the concept. there's a reason that a lot of people agree I explained the situation really well: i know my shit, and i referenced a very smart and articulate guy who knows his shit. istg, i've been lurking in this scene for YEARS.

not to mention that in general I try not to do a write-up on anything unless I am competent I grasp it well enough to not make a stupid mistake like that. this legitimately gets me in trouble in school so much; i'd much rather not write an essay than write one that poorly explains the concepts or my thoughts on them. i'm not immune to mistakes, i can, have, and will be wrong on the internet, but in general i do not say things authoritatively unless i've triple-checked them and when I do fuck up I try to shut it down and unfuck it asap.

[pesterloglog]

Dave Strider, Dirk Strider

Act 6, page 7917-7922

DAVE: damn

DAVE: and i thought our houses were pointlessly tall before

DAVE: it just doesnt stop from keep constantly getting more and more vertically enormous

DIRK: Shit is downright precipitous at this point.

DIRK: Like, upways.

DAVE: haha yeah

DAVE: we made sure as fuck not to come right out and literally describe that building as tall

DIRK: Hell yes.

DIRK: Who needs small and serviceable adjectives when the most ass-backwards way of saying a thing is right there, tantalizingly hidden within the vast ocean of language.

DIRK: Like a treasure in a huge shitty clam.

DAVE: we are way on the same page philosophically here

DIRK: Who is surprised by this?

DIRK: Zero people, is who.

DAVE: sounds like a club for losers to me

DAVE: theyre lucky they dont have any members, otherwise theyd all be lame as hell

DIRK: Yeah.

DAVE: so uh

DAVE: why do the houses need to be so tall again

DAVE: i never actually understood that

DAVE: except to reach the gates but once we all figured out how to fly and shit that became so pointless

DIRK: Yeah. After a while in the game, building kind of stopped mattering.

DIRK: Except near the end. Getting them to the top is just a point of completion.

DIRK: Then you dump the grist rig on top of it, apparently.

DIRK: That lets the thing spray out all the grist from the hoard in the planet's core, kind of like a huge oil derrick I guess.

DAVE: oh

DAVE: how do you know this

DAVE: do you guys have like a manual or

DIRK: I'm in communication with Arquiusprite.

DIRK: He's working on it now.

DAVE: so youre in communication with him like...

DAVE: RIGHT now?

DIRK: Yes.

DIRK: Via my shades.

DIRK: Which he incidentally used to be.

DIRK: Like, as a computer, which he lived inside as my Auto-Responder.

DAVE: right

DAVE: and

DAVE: uh

DAVE: why... did you make that thing again

DAVE: not that you ever told me before

DAVE: 'again' is just like a stammering tack-on to that sentence so as to try and not sound too fucking rude

DIRK: I don't think it's a rude question. It's perfectly fair to wonder what was going through my head when I made him.

DIRK: I've spent a lot of time wondering about that myself.

DAVE: so you just

DAVE: straight up programmed a copy of your brain

DIRK: There was some programming involved, but also a bit of cheating, through the mapping of a captchalogued ghost-imprint of my brain.

DIRK: I guess part of it was just about trying to understand myself.

DIRK: But I don't think I would have put it that way at the time. For a while I insisted he was meant to be a "debate partner" or some horseshit.

DIRK: I was pretty young, and had some stupid ideas.

DIRK: About irony in particular. But also a lot of mostly faux-intellectual thoughts on a wide variety of topics.

DIRK: Like philosophy, consciousness, programming, identity, history, ancient pop-culture... really it ran the full gamut of pretension.

DIRK: Not that I don't still find that stuff interesting. I'd just like to think I'm somewhat less full of shit about it all now.

DAVE: yeah me too

DAVE: i mean, about my interests and stuff

DIRK: Creating him was an interesting exercise I guess, but over the years I came to see his development as one of my biggest mistakes.

DIRK: He sort of turned into a monster. But I could never bring myself to get rid of him, or even really blame him for being an asshole, because he wasn't actually that different from me.

DIRK: Like, by definition.

DIRK: He seems alright as Arquius though. At least it keeps him busy, obsessing over his muscles, asking for milk and shit like that.

DAVE: hmm

DAVE: i guess i started some projects i regretted

DAVE: but nothin like making a milk weirdo eventually exist

DAVE: it sounds fucked up but is also kind of an awesome story in its own way

DIRK: I guess so.

DAVE: maybe im lucky i was never that good with computers

DAVE: now computer ART thats a different story

DAVE: ok it actually isnt i fuckin suck at that too

DAVE: but dammit i try my best and make some magic happen at least in my own mind so maybe thats good enough

DIRK: It certainly worked out for you in my universe.

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: i mean

DAVE: i DID captchalogue my own ghost brain once but i didnt know what to make of that and thought it was kinda weird so that never really went anywhere

DAVE: probably for the best

DIRK: It definitely is.

DIRK: Tinkering with your own mind, or identity or whatever... it's a dark road to go down.

DIRK: There are enough splinters of everyone running around out there as it is, just as a natural byproduct of our reality. For me in particular. Probably for you too, as a time player.

DIRK: That process doesn't need to be encouraged or fucked with.

DAVE: for real

DAVE: my bro did cool things with computers too

DAVE: i mean nothin like making a clone of his brain or anything thank god

DAVE: just some absurd bullshit with web bots and stuff mostly to help prop up his various "enterprises"

DIRK: You mean the porn stuff?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: but with puppets of course

DAVE: it was always about the puppets

DIRK: Naturally.

DAVE: he made all these porn bots that would just talk to each other in a chatroom endlessly

DAVE: all like gettin each other riled up about squishy bottoms and whatnot

DAVE: actually it was pretty entertaining to watch them go at it for hours

DAVE: i think they may have been teetering on the threshold of SOMETHING resembling self awareness?

DAVE: except they only seemed to apply that faculty to reach even more heightened states of sexual excitement for a bunch of nude soft puppets

DIRK: That sounds...

DIRK: Oddly rewarding.

DIRK: I mean, not to say he wasn't still a douche.

DIRK: But as a pastime, cultivating a group of earnest, erotic puppet-loving chatbots sounds so much more relaxing than painstakingly constructing a version of your own brain, and then arguing with it for years thereafter.

DIRK: Almost like tending to a little flock of pigeons.

DAVE: yeah you know he did some cool things

DAVE: it wasnt necessarily all inherently terrible

DAVE: things i would really appreciate under better circumstances

DAVE: he definitely had a lot of drive and also some uh "ideas" that warranted a certain amount of respect i guess

DAVE: he just

DAVE: maybe should not have been allowed near a child?

DAVE: sall im sayin

DIRK: Sounds about right.

DIRK: We really don't have to talk about him anymore though, if it is going to stir up more bad shit for you.

DAVE: nah im alright

DAVE: i think that is all mostly out of my system

DAVE: i mean not forever because i dont think thats how things work

DAVE: i just mean my venting fit is over and im probably good for another 16 years or so and i can return to being mostly deadpan and rad

DIRK: Ok.

DIRK: Well, in sixteen years, if you need someone to vent to again, let me know.

DAVE: sure

DAVE: assuming we havent been killed by like 10 jacks before that i will

DAVE: you certainly seem to be the right guy for that

DIRK: For what?

DAVE: i mean like the most suitable recipient of my hysterical fits on that particular subject

DAVE: there is no way i would ever tell karkat all that

DAVE: i mean maybe some stuff but not ALL the stuff its just too heavy

DAVE: i certainly wasnt gonna mention the stuff to rose or john or jade or whoever else

DAVE: if i was ever gonna do one of my patented acrobatic pirouettes off that particular handle to anyone it really only could have been at him

DAVE: except he was dead

DAVE: and even if he wasnt and i did say all that shit

DAVE: theres no way it would have resulted in anything resembling reconciliation

DAVE: which i think

DAVE: was something i kinda needed

DAVE: but didnt realize it

DAVE: so....

DAVE: thank you for being a really plausible stand in for him who i could rip to shreds??

DAVE: while still being basically innocent of all that terrible garbage

DAVE: so you end up sorta being like an avatar for him that is much easier to forgive

DAVE: i mean

DAVE: maybe FORGIVE isnt the right word because im not sure he deserves that and anyway it doesnt matter because hes been dead for years and at this point is just an irrelevant deceased weirdo who doesnt matter anymore

DAVE: i guess i mean coming around to a place where i dont have to feel rotten all the time anymore

DAVE: and i guess im lucky i got to blunder into a reality that just happened to have the exact right version of a dude which made that possible for me

DAVE: sorry this fuckin ramble is really getting away from me

DAVE: i have no idea if im making sense anymore

DIRK: I think I get it.

DIRK: And sure.

DIRK: You're welcome for me existing.

DAVE: hey can that be like

DAVE: the motto on our family crest

DIRK: I think it already is.

DAVE: all that melodramatic sadbabble aside

DAVE: i think its perfectly cool if youre still curious about your adult self

DAVE: and i dont mind tellin you more stuff about him if you want

DAVE: i know im still wondering about what my adult self got up to

DIRK: Yeah.

DIRK: Well like I said, any time you want to know more, feel free to ask.

DAVE: kay how about

DAVE: we do this thing

DAVE: when i met roxy we did a thing

DIRK: A thing?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: its called the lightning round

DIRK: That does sound like a Roxy thing.

DIRK: Does it by any chance involve asking a rapid-fire series of questions, some of which end up being a bit too personal or invasive?

DAVE: well yeah when she does it

DAVE: we could be chill though

DAVE: when it comes to asking about each others secret crushes and shit

DIRK: Then I guess I will disclaim in advance that I don't have any, and I don't care about yours even if you do.

DAVE: it is settled then on the fact that we are a couple of cool dudes who know where to draw the line on certain topics

DIRK: Cool.

DIRK: So how do we start.

DIRK: Whose lightning round is this, mine or yours?

DAVE: it can be yours go ahead shoot

DIRK: Ok.

DIRK: How...

DIRK: Did...

DIRK: He, um,

DIRK: Come to "adopt" you?

DAVE: i was a baby and i came down to earth on a meteor while riding a pony with a pink heart on its ass

DAVE: he found me in a crater on top of a dead pony and gave me a lil baby pair of shades that look exactly like the ones youre wearin now

DIRK: I see.

DIRK: So you decided to ditch those shades for the aviator glasses?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: years ago john got me these for my bday

DAVE: it might have been like an "ironic dare" to wear them i dont remember

DAVE: but when i got em i was like hell yeah im wearing these

DAVE: gonna rock these fuckers til the end of time

DAVE: they were ben stillers

DAVE: like literally

DAVE: they actually touched his weird sort of gaunt face in one of his films

DIRK: Wait...

DIRK: THE Stiller?

DAVE: yeah

DIRK: Incredible.

DIRK: Also, such a shame what happened to that poor man.

DAVE: wait what happened to him

DIRK: I can tell you when it's your lightning round.

DIRK: Or mine. Whatever. I'm still not sure whose lightning round it is when you're the one asking questions.

DAVE: dunno ask roxy

DIRK: Ok. Anyway, didn't mean to interrupt.

DAVE: but yeah we would send each other stuff sometimes

DAVE: me and john

DAVE: well we all would

DAVE: usually absurd birthday packages and such

DIRK: We did that too.

DIRK: Except I had to send things through time.

DIRK: Always had to figure out stuff small enough to send through the sendificator, even if it was piece by piece.

DAVE: nice

DAVE: one time it turned out we ACCIDENTALLY sent presents through time

DAVE: i mean not literally, more in a roundabout way

DAVE: we all sent john a rabbit

DAVE: but all three rabbits just turned out to be the same damn rabbit

DAVE: because of stupid time shit

DIRK: Once I deliberately and quite literally sent a rabbit through time.

DIRK: It was a robot.

DAVE: wow

DIRK: He was a loyal friend to Jane. I don't know what happened to him though.

DAVE: yeah i dunno what happened to johns rabbits either

DAVE: rabbits am i right

DIRK: I hear you, man.

DAVE: what next

DIRK: Hm.

DIRK: You say he owned Cal as well?

DAVE: yep

DIRK: Did he come down to Earth on a meteor with Cal too?

DAVE: i think so

DAVE: that was a long time ago

DAVE: kinda weird to imagine him strutting around with that puppet as a kid in the 80s

DAVE: or maybe just kinda funny actually

DAVE: he sure held on to it a long time

DAVE: must have gotten attached at a really early age and just never let go

DAVE: i guess you fell to earth with one of those things too?

DIRK: Yeah.

DIRK: But if I came to Earth on a meteor the same way you all did, then I guess I just got dunked right in the fucking ocean.

DIRK: Which makes sense. One of my earliest memories is of using Cal as a flotation device.

DIRK: So he sorta saved my life in a way. I guess I bonded with him too, the way your bro did, even if that sounds a bit stupid.

DIRK: Then again, it didn't help matters much that I lived alone in the middle of the ocean. He was my only real life friend. I mean, until I built some new ones.

DAVE: hmm wait we fucked up

DAVE: i asked you a question its not my turn

DAVE: keep firing

DIRK: Ok.

DIRK: How did your bro die?

DAVE: he died fighting one of these jacks

DAVE: at this point i almost forget which one

DAVE: no wait

DAVE: ok yeah it was the omnipotent dog one

DAVE: the jack from our session

DAVE: he was fighting like a lesser form of him and then jack got extra prototyped by dog powers and then got outmatched and stabbed with his own sword

DAVE: pretty sure davesprite was fighting with him and almost died too but then it turned out he didnt

DAVE: but now im at least 99% sure that davesprite is DEFINITELY dead and wont suddenly reappear as a stupid surprise or anything

DIRK: I hate stupid surprises.

DAVE: word

DIRK: So, you said he "trained" you.

DIRK: I'm guessing that means he knew what was coming?

DIRK: Or, some things about your future, at least?

DAVE: seems that way

DAVE: not sure what he knew or how he knew it

DAVE: all our guardians seemed to know bits and pieces of stuff and did vague mysterious things to prepare

DAVE: to this day i have no idea if he was training me to fight lord english or if he even knew who that guy was on any conscious level

DAVE: or it was more like general purpose training to be able to survive some hard shit after the end of the world happened

DAVE: youd have to ask him but thats impossible

DAVE: i do know he managed to get the drop on a meteor before i entered the game

DIRK: What?

DAVE: as far as i can tell he stood on top of it and split it in half with his sword

DIRK: Um,

DIRK: Not to be too much of a wet blanket on that rad as fuck anecdote, but that sounds kind of far fetched.

DAVE: yeah it does doesnt it

DAVE: but then again so does a baby getting dunked from space in the ocean then floating on a weird doll and then growin up by himself with no adults around

DIRK: That's not far fetched. It was pretty straightforward.

DIRK: I think I just found a building poking out of the water, climbed up, then I just started foraging for food in there like a feral infant.

DIRK: Supplies which I'm sure your adult self must have left behind for me, seeing as he clearly must have known some things about the future too.

DIRK: Speaking of which, maybe it's your turn now?

DAVE: yeah ok

DAVE: questions about me hmm lets see

DAVE: ok FIRST the fuck of all

DAVE: what happened to ben stiller

DIRK: He was deemed a heretic, and was crucified on the Washington Monument by some clowns.

DAVE: wow

DIRK: Due to his dedication to freedom and peace, he came to be seen as a martyr, and then a holy figure.

DIRK: He was left on the monument as an example to all, but thousands of faithful gathered below to gaze up at his pious, sort of gaunt face.

DIRK: For years thereafter, his followers would carve stone busts of him in his memory, capturing the piercing glare of his final expression.

DIRK: But they were all smashed to pieces by the presidential church.

DIRK: That religious movement didn't last very long.

DIRK: Rumor has it the batterwitch had a lot of experience crushing righteous insurrections.

DAVE: did my adult self get pissed about stiller

DAVE: i bet he got pissed

DIRK: Yeah. There was a whole series of final insults that led to his active rebellion, instead of just producing subversive media.

DIRK: At one point, the witch "remastered" all of his films to clean up all the shitty artifacts, and released them in stunning high-def quality all over the world, using a rational business model and everything.

DIRK: That REALLY set him off.

DAVE: what the fuck

DAVE: how fucking dare that woman

DAVE: so then he tried to kill the batterwitch right

DAVE: who is the same exact alien as the condesce in this session??

DIRK: Yes. Same one.

DIRK: And yeah, he teamed up with Rose from the same era.

DIRK: They supposedly put up a good fight, but both died.

DAVE: so...

DAVE: does john know that he is literally about to go fight betty crocker yet or what

DIRK: I have no idea.

DIRK: I really don't know John at all, or any of your friends.

DIRK: I know Jane was the heiress to the Crocker brand. Uh, obviously? It is her name after all.

DIRK: Was John the heir to that empire in his universe?

DAVE: nah

DAVE: i mean not to my or his knowledge

DAVE: he just fuckin hated that company for some reason

DAVE: i think his reason was literally as mundane as just being slightly overexposed to cake

DAVE: thats classic john though he doesnt get pissed about anything except for the absolute dumbest shit

DAVE: but i guess his instincts were right in this case

DAVE: maybe we should just

DAVE: not tell him

DAVE: that hes fightin crocker i think the poor dude has probably had enough mental breakdowns for one adventure

DAVE: we all have

DIRK: I'd like to get to know him.

DIRK: Not to mention Rose and Jade. Would have been nice to hang out and chat, in a circumstance where we weren't supposed to prepare for an imminent deadly struggle.

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: well i guess we could have hung out there a few minutes longer

DAVE: i mean you wouldnt have got much outta jade who is stuck in perma-nap mode

DAVE: just like old times i guess

DIRK: Huh?

DAVE: she used to sleep a lot

DIRK: Ah.

DAVE: but yeah there wasnt much time except for like a bunch of heys and oh nice to meet yous

DAVE: and also i think i would have still been a shitty train wreck socially if we all just hunkered down right then and there for another extensive round of freestyle paltalk

DIRK: Right, I was kind of nervous about lingering there for more than a minute too.

DIRK: Mainly because of Jake.

DIRK: I didn't want to make him uncomfortable.

DIRK: I think I have done enough of that.

DAVE: i guess jake was kinda like your john of the group huh

DAVE: wait that was a pretty dumb observation never mind

DIRK: Nah, sounds about right.

DIRK: Seems like John was your close buddy growing up, and Jake was mine.

DAVE: john and i never really had anything like a falling out

DAVE: except for not talkin to each other for a few years on account of being on a meteor and boat respectively

DAVE: but i guess you two had some buddy troubles or somethin?

DIRK: Yes. A lot of buddy troubles.

DIRK: I vaguely touched on it earlier. I was a really bad influence in his life.

DAVE: what happened

DIRK: A lot of things, that were mostly my fault.

DIRK: Basically, I think I bullied him into dating me.

DIRK: Although I had plenty of "help" from my Auto-Responder.

DIRK: There were a lot of insane plans that he hatched on my behalf.

DIRK: But in fairness, I went along with them.

DIRK: To this day, I can't really tell how much of that bullshit was his doing, and how much was mine, which I've just covered up through denial or selective memory.

DAVE: wait

DAVE: you

DAVE: you dated jake?

DIRK: Yeah.

DIRK: That didn't last long though.

DIRK: It was really lopsided and kind of forced.

DAVE: ...

DAVE: so

DAVE: you

DAVE: ...

DAVE: hmm

DIRK: What?

DAVE: nothing

DAVE: i think were breakin one of the rules here

DAVE: this tangent got too personal

DIRK: Oh yeah.

DIRK: I forgot we weren't doing that.

DIRK: Anyway, carry on. You were asking about adult Dave?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: so that covers how he died

DAVE: taking a futile stand against some unbeatable foe

DAVE: cant say im too surprised about that cause what else is even new

DAVE: what about his early life though

DAVE: guess i arrived around the same year my bro did in my universe?

DAVE: just came down on the same dead horse i rode in on

DAVE: into a world full of opportunities

DAVE: how did i get started

DIRK: His early life isn't well documented.

DIRK: There's hardly anything to read about him until he broke into show business with a few obscure projects at the turn of the century.

DIRK: It all snowballed from there.

DAVE: i guess the one thing we know for sure is i didnt find a kid in a crater and take him under my wing

DAVE: that was probably for the best

DIRK: Heh.

DAVE: actually maybe its better that most of his story is left to my imagination

DAVE: kinda like how you said you spent a lot of time thinkin about him

DAVE: filling in the gaps of his ridiculous exploits

DIRK: Right.

DIRK: There's certainly a lot of lore to work with.

DIRK: Urban legends and stuff.

DAVE: like what

DAVE: actually wait

DAVE: dont tell me

DAVE: at least not now maybe down the road it would be cool to hear some

DAVE: i think id prefer to fill in the blanks myself for a while

DAVE: really it sounds dope as hell to imagine that sort of blank canvas life

DAVE: dropped on earth as a kid in the 70s or 80s or whatever with no bossy adult to reel me in

DAVE: and just having to figure stuff out

DAVE: especially knowing that many years later it all worked out ok

DAVE: really wonder what i did

DAVE: was i like some homeless eighties ragamuffin???

DAVE: jesus christ that sounds fairly adorable if so

DAVE: maybe i slept in an alley on a bed of rubix cubes and alf merchandise

DAVE: or maybe i offered my old school rap services for food

DIRK: Like, through a shitty cardboard booth?

DIRK: You know, like the one from the fuckin' Charlie Brown comics.

DIRK: "This is what the refrance," FYI.

DAVE: yes exactly

DAVE: this sounds like exactly the life for me

DAVE: what if without a penny to my name and the wind at my back i hopped a boxcar to the big apple

DAVE: because as a dumb child i naively believed thats where they made all the apple juice

DAVE: id be sorely disappointed when i got there but it wouldnt matter because id probably scrape together a living on off off off broadway like...

DAVE: making shitty cartoons

DAVE: on stage

DAVE: and saying

DAVE: you guys

DAVE: this will be SO much funnier once the internet happens TRUST ME

DAVE: then the aristocratic patrons of fine theater just shrug and dump their shillings into my orphan hat

DIRK: It sounds to me like you've been reading up on the urban legends already.

DAVE: hahaha

DAVE: i wonder if he had like

DAVE: friends

DIRK: It sounds like he knew a lot of people, at least later in life.

DAVE: sure

DAVE: i mean im sure he knew rose at some point because obviously they teamed up

DAVE: but as fairly old people?

DAVE: it sounds as though they only knew each other as a result of their notability

DIRK: This seems likely.

DAVE: i mean more like the friends i grew up with

DAVE: he couldnt have grown up with john or jade as friends because they were already old by the time he got there

DAVE: this cool 80s kid fantasy was probably just a lot lonelier than ive been picturing in my sweet daydreams

DAVE: i didnt even have the MAYOR god what a nightmare now that i think about it

DAVE: i wonder if all he cared about was making ludicrous shit and fighting evil pastry moguls

DAVE: do you know if he had any other interests

DIRK: Like what?

DAVE: i dont know

DAVE: did you ever read any urban legends about.....

DAVE: paleontology

DIRK: Paleontology?

DAVE: yes the scientific study of dead shit

DIRK: Not that I recall.

DAVE: hmm

DAVE: i guess he probably didnt do anything with that

DAVE: what a shame

DAVE: maybe he never even got the idea since he had completely different experiences

DAVE: but if i were suddenly dropped back in the 20th century id probably look into it at some point

DAVE: i dunno how though

DAVE: i think it would be mainly like

DAVE: some sort of theraputic interest

DAVE: something relaxing to think about instead of a bunch of ironic and stupidly ambitious objectives

DIRK: Yeah, like the porn bots.

DAVE: yeah exactly

DIRK: Maybe some day, when we're both old men, you can live a quiet life tending to your fossils, and I will do the same with my dear collection of simple-minded chat robots fixated on puppet ass.

DAVE: sounds like the fucking life to me

DIRK: What was the lightning round question this stemmed from again?

DIRK: I forget.

DAVE: dunno

DAVE: maybe were tapering off with the lightning round stuff anyway and its just naturally deteriorating into regular dudechat

DIRK: Maybe.

DIRK: You sure you don't have anything else before we say it's officially deteriorated?

DAVE: k heres a curveball

DAVE: what the fuck are you wearing

DIRK: My prince gear.

DIRK: You know. Leggings, slippers, the poofy asshole pants, a hood with some sort of cloth tiara deal embedded in it.

DIRK: Basic stuff for princes, apparently.

DAVE: huh

DAVE: gotta say

DAVE: some of these god tier ensembles really are...

DAVE: something

DIRK: I thought I hated it at first.

DIRK: But over the couple hours I spent flying back, with time to think about all sorts of stuff...

DIRK: It kinda grew on me.

DIRK: The asshole pants are pretty damn comfortable, so I dunno if I even care how stupid they look.

DIRK: And I *am* kind of an asshole, after all. So who am I to complain.

DAVE: i thought the same thing about my cape outfit at first

DAVE: felt like some bozo from the renaissance festival

DAVE: like maybe i should get on a horse and sing a shitty ballad

DAVE: but then it grew on me pretty quickly

DAVE: hardly ever took it off in three years

DAVE: youre right its comfortable and theyre fuckin magic pajamas or whatever and they start to feel like part of who you are after long enough

DAVE: i mean they are supposed to last you forever right

DAVE: kinda by definition since they come along with immortality

DAVE: maybe part of their magical nature includes this insidious quality where they grow on you

DAVE: or not i dunno maybe this is bullshit and ill just wear some normal person clothes when this is all over

DAVE: what about you are you gonna wear god duds forever

DIRK: Nah. I'm sure I'll wear regular stuff again at some point.

DIRK: If a shirt with a hat on it can be deemed regular.

DAVE: im cool with deeming it as such

DAVE: yeah maybe youre right and we should all stop dressing like tools from an infinite magic slumber party for floundering teens

DAVE: and just look like standard floundering teens

DAVE: some of the getups are pretty out there

DAVE: jakes tho...

DAVE: uh

DAVE: damn??

DIRK: I...

DIRK: Yeah.

DIRK: That page costume.

DIRK: I'd have commented on it, except that would've been casting a stone through a particularly fragile glass wardrobe.

DIRK: So... I just flew away.

DAVE: yeah there was uh

DAVE: some palpable awkwardness there

DIRK: Hm.

DAVE: sorry im still

DAVE: tryin to

DAVE: like

DAVE: wrap my head around

DAVE: ...

DIRK: What?

DAVE: uh

DAVE: dammit

DAVE: ok i guess i might have to break one of our lightning round rules

DAVE: only a little tho

DAVE: i hope

DIRK: About what?

DIRK: The personal stuff?

DAVE: yeah

DIRK: That's fine.

DAVE: ok maybe im not even asking you anything

DAVE: maybe this is just a starting point to ramble to myself

DAVE: on a certain topic

DAVE: i think...

DAVE: there is a SLIGHT chance...

DAVE: i may be the biggest idiot in the world

DIRK: ?

DAVE: when it comes to understanding some things about my bro

DAVE: some pieces i never really put together

DAVE: about him

DAVE: until maybe literally right now

DAVE: which i think makes me an objective dumbass

DIRK: What does this have to do with me and Jake?

DAVE: idk

DAVE: nothin

DAVE: maybe i dont wanna ask you anything about jake

DAVE: maybe ill just keep abiding by the code of basic dude manners on that

DAVE: if i bother skirtin the line of this rule maybe id rather ask you other stuff instead

DIRK: Like what?

DAVE: like

DAVE: um

DAVE: say one of your best friends is a knucklehead you havent seen in three years

DAVE: and unless you use ultra direct and explicit language he just wont put two and two together himself

DAVE: and also say ANOTHER best friend is a girl you feel like you had kind of a special relationship with but you ALSO hadnt seen in three years

DAVE: and shes asleep

DAVE: but at some point shell wake up and youll have to talk to her

DIRK: ...

DAVE: this is dumb im not making any sense

DAVE: lemme start over

DAVE: ok lets say

DAVE: way back whenever

DAVE: howww

DAVE: ...

DAVE: how did you tell your friends

[solus-official]

1 - what was your first distro? Some branch of Ubuntu that my classmate made because he wanted to prove to me he was a "Master Hacker". I don't think there were any changes. He did turn into She eventually though so thats cool 2 - what was your biggest linux fuckup? Probably when I was attempting to set up a dualboot medium on a USB drive, so I could carry a "workstation" wherever. GRUB corrupted instantly because the USB drive was like, 20 years old and way too small. I use that drive for music in my car now. 3 - have you ever run rm / on real hardware? Never really tried lmao 4 - do you dual boot or have a secondary machine with windows? I do have a main gaming machine with windows on it, however as soon as I can afford a new GPU then i'm switching fully to linux 5 - did you change your default shell? Only when testing linux distro's that don't default to BASH. Sorry, i don't care if ZSH or FISH is better, I'm just used to BASH. 6 - are you afraid of git? Yes. 7 - what was the first machine you installed linux on? A laptop I stole from someone at my middle school. No idea who's it was, we weren't given laptops like the new generation is. 8 - do you know your way around vim keybinds? Basically not at all. I know how to move the mouse, that's about it. 9 - what is your favourite non-os software? I don't remember the actual name but someone made a little animal crossing radio software for linux computers. I installed it onto my laptop and my buddies laptop. It plays animal crossing music relative to your actual time, like in the game, so when it hits 2am the program starts playing the 2am animal crossing theme. Literally the best program that I know exists. 10- biggest linux pet peeve? Biggest peeve is that Android is considered a Linux Distro, and yet the most complex and compatible mobile phone distributions we have are LineageOS and GrapheneOS which are arguably just Android minus Google. Ubuntu touch exists and it's cool; PineTouch exists and is cool, but neither of those are compatible or good enough to use as a daily driver. We need more people devoted to making Linux-Phones more developed. I'd love an Arch Phone 11- biggest annoyance with the community? Anyone who doesn't sort their files by purpose. (I've met them. They make my head hurt.) 12- do you like your current distro? Yeah, It's just Arch in a flannel shirt, just wish it was a little more stable than it is. 13- Xenia or Tux? Both. Tux handles the business side and meeting with investors, while Xenia works with the community and acts like a Sales Rep. They are both equally good at coding and will commonly argue over specific changes that don't ultimately matter (Like whether the bluetooth icon should be on the right or left of the wi-fi icon.) This is my headcannon you cannot take it from me (I may end up writing a story or something i dunno deal with it) 14- what software are you never using again? Anything Adobe. I used to use Adobe stuffs in school, especially After Effects and Premiere Pro. Even if I'll never find a program that works as smoothly as those did (back then) I will never use any Adobe product again. 15- stock distro or hours of yak shaving? Neither? I don't really like most stock distro's but I only ever do the minimum amount of work to make it something I'll actually use. I try to spend maximum 30min's fixing the things I don't like, and if that doesn't happen then i give up. 16- have you compiled the kernel? Not officially, no. Maybe some day. (I'm not counting that stupid school project where they handed us a prepared VM and guide sheet where no risk was present.)

Linux ask game

1 - what was your first distro? 2 - what was your biggest linux fuckup? 3 - have you ever run rm / on real hardware? 4 - do you dual boot or have a secondary machine with windows? 5 - did you change your default shell? 6 - are you afraid of git? 7 - what was the first machine you installed linux on? 8 - do you know your way around vim keybinds? 9 - what is your favourite non-os software? 10- biggest linux pet peeve? 11- biggest annoyance with the community? 12- do you like your current distro? 13- Xenia or Tux? 14- what software are you never using again? 15- stock distro or hours of yak shaving? 16- have you compiled the kernel?

[foosybit]

Ok im probably not the best person to ask this because ive been using krita for YEARSSS. like. last time I used firealpaca was 2018 which is... 6 years ago TT_TT but i did a brief pass-over of what firealpaca looks like now and it seems like the things i personally didn't like about it from 2018 are still present. and also the only computer drawing programs ive used are firealpaca, krita, and a really old pirated version of paint tool sai that was so bad it didn't even have a circle tool. absolutely abysmal for my eddsworld phase. but ya i do really like krita a lot tho. explanation under cut cuz its long

First one's pretty minor, but firealpaca does give you a popup immediately lol. i know it's easy to get used to, but its one of those small things where i'd rather not be asked to buy something or update my fully updated software every time i open the program. Firealpaca also just opens you up to the drawing ui, and krita opens you up to a specific launch ui that i really like

it shows all your recently opened files with a thumbnail too so you don't really have to go rummaging through your files every time you wanna draw which is super convenient. and as you can see i literally just never enabled news LOL which would probably tell me about any new krita updates idfk i never enabled it.

Another one that's more major to me is that the firealpaca animation system is actually ass omfg. they say like "wowww you can do onion skin !!!" but thats literally it. and i like to animate from time to time so that's a no-go for me. firealpacas animation system is manged through YOUR LAYERS???? AND MAYBE A FOLDER???? jail. awful. and you have to wait for firealpaca to render a preview. if you ever decide to animate, krita is way better. it actually has a proper timeline and hold frames and real-time previews. it might not be the super best professional animation software cuz it does fight with me a little bit, but for someone who just makes small gifs every once in a while, it's wayyy more useful than firealpaca without being overwhelming which i like. heres what the animation workspace looks like:

the final real qualm i remember having is that the blending on firealpaca was just..... not great. I downloaded it again breifly to check how it's looking and it's still not looking too hot. For the examples I just used my mouse with no pressure sensitivity mostly because i was too lazy to set up my drawing tablet, but also it shows what one consistent opacity/pressure sensitivity looks like

the transparent bg one is firealpaca and the tan bg one is krita. it seems like the difference in opacity of the brush doesn't affect the blending strength of the brush at all in firealpaca. 1 and 2 are the flat watercolor brush and the blending on that one just looks ugly 2 me sorry. 1 is at 50% opacity and 2 is at 100%. 3 is the fluffy watercolor brush at 50% opacity and 4 is the same brush at 100% opacity. it blends to the same amount regardless of opacity, so it seems like the same brush calculations are happening, just literally at a lower opacity. For the krita one, i used the wet paint brush and 5 is 100% opacity and 6 is 50% opacity. It gives you a lot of variety and control for the amount of blending you want based on pressure sensitivity which is super handy to me; i would not have been able to do those crazy digital paintings i used to do years ago without it (pre-mysn days cuz my style has since changed, but u can find it in my pixiv).

Also idk if im stupid or what but i can't find any method to change the blending mode of your brush in firealpaca. it's a neat feature that lets you just do a few brushstrokes with a multiply blending mode (or whatever blending mode) without having to make a new layer and merge it.

But yeah I'm sure firealpaca has its pros. I saw a bunch of cool pattern brushes on their site which seem like they'd be super cool to use, it's just that for my personal tastes i remember thinking that moving to krita was a huge improvement. the only thing that takes a bit of getting used to is that krita doesn't have a clipping function, you just have to alpha-lock a layer within a folder, but you get used to it (theres a "create clipping group" option that does this for you).

Bonus for if u ever get krita:

this is my favorite drawing brush in the entire world i can't draw without it. just a basic toothy brush but it's my life blood. and you should totally download the ballpoint pen brush. just search up krita ballpoint pen brush. its not like i use it all the time or anything but it's super fun and i like it and if u use krita i think u should mess around with it at least once X3

[sorryimananti-romantic]

ohohoh you will see me more often here now 😎

and omg thats so cool i think that requires so much more care and attention ur doing great though!! im not struggling with programming per se but as an engineering major i do struggle with graphic design a lot 😭😭 the program we use is sooooo baad it fr messes up everything and leaves u hanging crying screaming ksksksksk

as for programming im still a newbie cause i didnt study it at all in highschool and im catching up on everything now and i love it so much aaaaaa im so happy we have this in common too besides our love for ateez 💞

and YES san is a softie approved. thank u for listening to my ted talk

hoho yes i'd love that 😎

yeah i've started from python and i'm like halfway done, learned the basics of css and html along the way and just paused it when life got a bit overwhelming. now i just refresh my knowledge or look for mini projects or challenges to keep my brain from deleting what i've learned lmao if you're familiar with python we need to talk i need someone who's familiar with it to answer my dumb questions (my big bro is literally a computer science major but i would rather jump off from a 58 story building than ask him for obvious reasons LMAO)

engineering major omgg and graphic design are you perhaps using autocad or sth similar bc i've heard about it 😭 i promise once you get the hang of whatever software you're using things will become 10x easier hehe

love to see we have these things in common and yes. san is a softie through and through 😌 thank you for agreeing

[whole-bilk-milk]

just to preface im saying all this in good faith but blik thats just not true, computer science grades are low (at least here) and some kids in my class barely know how to operate a computer. one girl wanted to pay me to do her excel work for her

like yeah a bunch of teens have computer knowledge but that's mostly the ones with free access to the internet, some people just weren't or couldnt be interested in that? idk what theyre doing in their free time because im chronically online myself but like i didnt read that post as op shitting on teens not knowing how a machine works its just that genuinely i feel like knowledge on how to operate computers and the web is lower then it should be. even with coputer classes! i mean, school isnt everything? for example, i had to take german for two years but i still cant form a sentence. even though i was taught it. so yk thats just what i think

yeah it's nothing on you and i'm not taking this personally! it's just from my experience (i'm not 15 or younger, but it's only a few years difference so the curriculum did not change in like 3-4 years) in elementary school you were taught how to use programs like word to write essays and they literally taught you how to open a browser. i already knew that at the time (i was like 6 i think?) but i know i was probably not in the average. what i'm saying is that my school wasn't a highly funded school and even they had computer classes. like even by that point me and every single one of my classmates had a desktop and home and had never touched a phone before. idk if i'm genuinely misunderstanding the point or if i'm just more privilaged than i thought i was but who knows ha. again, not mad! just confused and you're free to correct me lol

[i-love-u-loser]

A Homestuck Fan Re-Reads Homestuck (Notes and gaffs)

Page 1-105

Homestuck Thoughts and notes:

'> John: Squawk like an imbicile and shit on your desk.' is just whoever imputting these commands acting like a deranged twitch chat. Doc Scratch if thats you, your better than this.

John almost shits on his desk tho for real for real.

John has the STACK Sylladex system which only lets him use the most recently used item put in. Unless combining them like some video game system.

Bunny in the Box Count: 3

John's birthed Day is 4/13… if you even care.

John is bad at programming as we see by the two …. cake?? Programs on his comuter and an… 'AAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH~ATH' program? Wonder what any of those bitches do. Program cake, his dad bakes so hes participating via.. computer???? Look at my bad virtual cake dad- except his dad would be confused but proud. Dad Egbert is something we all derserve in our life.

Dave and John are talking about a movie I have never seen, I guess in it someone pees in a bottle and claims its apple juice. Howie Mandel is coming for your sealed apple juice dave.

TG: did you get the beta yet EB: no. EB: did you? TG: man i got two copies already TG: but i dont care im not going to play it or anything the game sounds boring TG: did you see how it got slammed in game bro???? EB: game bro is a joke and we both know it. TG: yeah TG: why dont you go check your mail maybe its there now EB: alright.

Dave is malliable like clay but also would probably play this game just to play with his friend for real for real.

John gets beat to the mail by his Dad, but also does not go down immideately anyway. Probably thinks he'll get pranked.

Okay not pranked, but the parent thing of being stuck down there with them. John, baby you have THE most normal parent of all the kids. I love you so much pls just talk to ur dad.

hey buddy, pal, bestie, wHY ARE WE CAPTCHALOGUING SASSACRES FAT ASS BOOK? YOU DO NOT NEED THIS

He is angry at the command text that he wants to make space for book, pick up arms, become RANCOUROUS. Angry John.

Dave also plays real hard into the cool angle at first.

Dave has the Hash Map Sylladex, he mocks John for having the Stack. Dave tells John also he can have a strife specibus (fighting object) because he is so used to having one. John has never needed to physically fight.

Looking at the Kind Abstrata list I would like to mention a few readable honorable mentions: Canekind, curlironkind, plankkind, rockkind, and fireexitkind.

ASSIGNED HAMMERKIND AT BIRTH.

John, literally not knowing better, goes 'yeah sure its not gonna be that relevant hammer is fine.'

JOHN PUT THE BOOK. ON TOP OF THE SMOKE PELLETS.

Sburb is just a boring house game. Yes. That's it! Thats all! 1 1/2 hats :)

John, already wearing glasses, puts on fake glasses and a pointy hat. How can you see right now.

A;so clown paintings, hollowed tombs. John hates clowns.

Command text: Admire Harlequins John: eW GROSS. I hate these. I hope someone steals these. Dad is a corn ball.

Love your Dad, John. Or I will.

"As domestic myth of unaccountable origin holds, a home borrows the spirit of the flame for as long as it makes a guest of it, much as the moon takes liberty with the sun's rays. " Homestuck, Page 50

Im sorry the fucking Command for the next page '>John: Topple urn.'

TWITCH CHAT THAT IS HIS DEAD GRANDMA.

Also would like to mention there is a burning peice of game bro on their floor. House fire starter anyone?

"CHAMP.

"YOU CAN DO ANYTHING IF YOU PUT YOUR MIND TO IT.

"I BELIEVE IN YOU"

John's dad is the BEST DAD. Even though I know the gift is a LARGE HARLEQUIN, and his son hates those his notes are very cute.

John is in fact, a silly little guy.

He is 13 btw, if you even care.

John has made peace with the harlequin by putting cake glued arms to it. Also there was a cake in his room and now on the couch with like a random array of candles.

'Land sakes alive, we are cooking with petrol now!' We sure are Mr. Sassacre.

I want to read THE SERIOUS JESTER.

John is severely allergic to peanuts.

Does John's dad smoke tabbaco? Is that what's in the pipes?

John is very good at piano.

"The peanut gallery over there sure is getting a kick out of it. You are allergic to their scorn." A statuette of the Joker and a boy in a limp Jester's hat laugh at John because he can't play 52 pick up.

JOHN LEAVES THE HOUSE, HE IS NO LONGER STUCK AT HOME.

"You have a feeling it's going to be a long day." Oh boy.

'> John: Leave a surprise for the mailman.' Twitch chat command text is back and really wants John to go.

Remember the green box.

Dad loves to bake, leave him be.

John does briefly consider breaking into his OWN kitchen.

He returns after failing to get mail, finds one of the Harlequin's arms have fallen off.

Homestuck music slaps btw.

DAD was not dumb enough to fall for the disguise, catches this stupid little guy lacking.

JOHNS CAPCHALOGUE DECK: CLEVER DISGUISE, CAPCHALOGUE CARD x1, SASSACRES FAT ASS BOOK, SMOKE PELLETS.

[S] STRIFE!

BTW THERE ARE 13 CANDLES ON THIS CAKE

John gets BOZOD with a Pie. However he equips the pie tin and thusly,, there go his smoke pellets.

Smoke pellets do…. nothing? John tries to take the cake and THE FAT ASS BOOK FROM BEFORE IS EVICTED.

SASSACRE YOU BEAUTIFUL BASTARD!!! You set off the pellets!!

Dad is now busy trying to calm the smoke alarm, and now John may take his packages and also….

His Dad's PDA?

JOHN MERGED THE TWO CAKES LIKE A DUMB ASS. YOU SILLY LITTLE BOY. DUMB TEENAGE BASTARD. (Affectionate)

ALL HE WANTED TO DO WAS SIT ON THE COUCH.

(Also you cant merge things if they are not next to each other without Risk.) Stack Sylladex, worst sylladex.

Clown Bathroom RUG love that John does not go into the Adult Male Bathroom.

John obtains a towel so he can contain this icky cake mess.