#yes! they often will be reduced to ONLY being mothers in the event they have children by both fans and writers and that IS super annoying

[asteria-argo]

you know as someone who doesn't want kids but enjoys the hell out of families in fiction both found and otherwise, I gotta say the people who are vehemently against the idea of their Girlboss Fav having kids because it'll ruin their characters are usually right but they're also super annoying about it.

[simlit]

Every odd numbers for Yehl and Taryn! Or you can reduce it to only questions you want to answer. 😁❤️‍🔥

1. How does your character think of their father? What do they hate and love about him? What influence - literal or imagined - did the father have?

Taryn // Taryn doesn't have a father. His mother was a god of creation, she gave birth to the twins of her own body, but their conception was of her own will. Yehl // Yehl has hated Aseris most his life, but worse, he always lived in fear of him. His father was incredibly toxic and abusive towards both Yehl and his mother, and Yehl has those memories burned into him like a violent dream. But despite how cruel his father was, he was the only parent Yehl had growing up. Losing his mother and having few good relationships in his life, especially familial relationships, when he was younger, drove him to pine for his father's attention and love. Being constantly demonized and told he was a failure, adult Yehl attempted to play into that role, but that, too, was simply a cry for attention. He never was able to earn his father's love, up until Aseris' death, and afterwards, that lack of closure and trauma still haunts him.

3. Brothers, sisters? Who do they like? Why? What do they despise about their siblings?

Taryn // There was a time when Taryn and Elsera got along. When they were young, and before the war, they had no reason to resent each other. But they have always been opposites. Taryn's calm and Elsera's brash were fated to butt heads. Despite the respect Taryn had for her in somewhat successfully ruling on her own for hundreds of years was inevitably dashed by her juvenile actions following the end of Act I. The two of them never reconcile after the events of AoA. Yehl // Oof this is gonna be a lot but he has seven siblings so... Judine was Yehl's favorite sibling ever since he was a child, and he really did idolize him. He only comes to see Judine as, and understand him more on a human level, after the events of the novel, but regardless, they remain very close and supportive. Linaea was a shining light in Yehl's later life. He didn't know much of her until he was already of age, and by then a lot of damage had already been done at Thera's hands, which Yehl held against Lin for a long time. His love for her was often marred with some form of resentment. A fact he doesn't come to realize until after she's gone; that he never was able to love her fully the way she did him. It's one of his greatest regrets. Most of Yehl's siblings he has little to no relationship with. Lonis and Alloria were already adults when he was born, and made no effort to get to know him. He's probably spoken to them less in the course of his life than one might a casual neighbor. While Alloria has no opinion of Yehl, Lonis was dismissive at best. Lore, though closest in age to Yehl, was equally as checked out. This has a lot to do with the Metunor being one of the most widely disparaged clans. Lore's mother advised him not to interact with Yehl lest it reflect poorly on the Metunor's already waning public standing. The sibling Yehl has, perhaps, the most important relationship with, is Porphery, who doubled as Yehl's "godfather". They had an incredibly rocky relationship when Yehl was young, with Porphery being more or less an overbearing babysitter. Their opposing personalities didn't help. But after Yehl becomes Celaedian, Porphery is the most consistent relationship Yehl has. He starts to confide in Porphery a great deal, using him as a sounding board and neutral support system. Yehl takes Porphery's death hardest of all, and is inconsolable for years following, to such a point that even Zehel recalls that period in his childhood with crystal clarity.

5. Were they overprotected as a child? Sheltered?

Taryn // No. Yehl // Yes. Tbh, Yehl is sheltered most his life, and learning to become strong enough to stand up for himself, if not on his own, is one of his main journeys.

7. What was the economic status of their family?

Taryn // Dragons don't really deal in material wealth (I know, shocking, no hoards of treasure here). But ofc, power pays 😋 You can get a lot done when you're king of all dragons. Yehl // He grew up a prince, despite his father having expensive vices and a poor hold on the kingdom's finances. Regardless, Yehl has only ever really known opulence. He definitely got a status (and economic) boost after graduating from disgraced prince to the King's consort.

23. What do they want from a partner? What do they think and feel of sex?

Taryn // Honestly? Nothing. Taryn would have been fine living his life solitary. He was not seeking a relationship, never would have thought about it or desired one until he met Yehl. Yehl just defined that role to him. I don't believe Taryn could have the capacity to love anyone else. It's why he's King Simp, he is quite literally Yehlsexual. Everything Yehl is, is what Taryn loves, and he has no expectations of him, nor would he ever wish him to change in any way. And while he struggled A LOT with the emotional side of their relationship, he used the physical as a way of demonstrating his feelings. Sex is incredibly important to Taryn, because it's his natural way of being expressive. He has long since learned to speak more, to give Yehl actual words, because he knows that's what Yehl needs as a non-dragon, but for Taryn, the physical parts of their relationship are absolutely crucial. Yehl // Once again, being exact opposites. Yehl always found sex to be the least meaningful form of expression. He never actually connected it to the ideas of love or romance until after being with Taryn. For him, it was mostly a meaningless act done for fun, and that perspective only started to shift once he'd already developed feelings for Taryn. Yehl does expect more of Taryn. He's had such little love shown to him in life, and still struggles to differentiate honest and true love from falsity that he really needs it spelled out for him. But he adjusts to Taryn's habits and mannerisms. He still expects shows of affection, even if it's as small as Taryn coming to wake him in the morning, or Taryn's overprotective/possessive nature. He adapts, but also expects that Taryn will be forthcoming about his feelings and intentions.

31. Does your character have children? How do they feel about their parental role?

Taryn // He takes his role as a father incredibly seriously. More seriously than he takes his role as king, honestly. Though he's not the affectionate sort of parent, he was still incredibly involved in Zehel's life as a guiding hand. He wanted to prepare Zehel for a life of complexity, but to ensure that he also kept an open mind. It was important to him that Zehel grew up restrained, humble, and well-educated. He put a great deal of emphasis on Zehel's studies, especially of history. Yehl // On the flipside, ofc, Yehl directly seeks to undo a lot of Taryn's teaching by instilling a proper sense of arrogance and entitlement into his son as he damn well should. Not that any of this really stuck, but he did his best. Similarly to Taryn, Yehl sees his role as a mother as the most important thing in his life. A lot of Yehl's past and life choices called back to his own relationship to his mother, so being that force for good in Zehel's life is crucial to him. He is an incredibly affectionate parent, being the opposite side of Taryn's coin in all ways. He's very open with his love for Zehel, becoming the clingy, sappy SMother we all know he is.

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

Can I request 1-25 for the farmer ask meme or is that too much

Sure, I don't mind writing all the questions at once 😃

1. Julian Braflovski (Most likely I will not change the Farmer's surname, it seems to me that it fits well)

2. He/him

3. Julian was 21 when he arrived in Stardew Valley

4. Bi (Bisexual) so many possible and beautiful bachelors and bachelorettes

5. Julian has a dog named Orion. An energetic and good puppy that Marnie found near the entrance to the farm and offered to Julian to take him. Although the puppy is a mongrel, he has all the makings of being an excellent shepherd dog. Guards the farm, plays with other farm animals, gets a lot of pets and often has zoomies. What a good boy!

6. Working in a Joja in which he was hired in his 18 as a talented and young candidate for a new position, Julian became disillusioned with the corporation in the first six months. But he couldn't leave, because the work supported him financially, and also made it possible to financially help his parents. Working for a greedy corporation that cared nothing but profit, add to that unfriendly co-workers, personal worries, noisy and dirty city environment. He went into a terrible mental state until Julian opened a letter from his grandfather. It was a radical job change, from a manager in a big city to a small farmer somewhere far away. But Julian has always loved plants and animals, knew a little about growing crops, and is already fed up with Joja, so he decided to take a serious step.

7. Everyone

8. Not to say that Julian had a crash on someone. There were Abigail, Shane and Sebastian, with whom Julian had been spending more time lately (and even thought about the proposal to date). But he realized that he did not have a crash, and appreciated their friendship more. But when a pink-haired gallant adventurer appeared on Ginger Island... Julian, not immediately, but as they became good friends, had a crash for the first time in his life

9. Lance (like c'mon)

10. It was already the fourth year when Julian came to Stardew Valley and decided to stay here forever, as he found his happiness in his favorite work, in friends, in his spouse, and in the secrets and magic of the valley which he reveals with curiosity.

11. Julian doesn't mind kids and would make a great parent. But the decision is also made by his soulmate - after all, this is decision for them both. So children or not - Julian will be happy in any case.

12. For Zuzu city - absolutely not. But Pine-mesa city - his parents still live there. And although Julian regularly calls them, exchanges letters, sends financial assistance and crops, he still misses his father and mother a little. But his parents sometimes come to visit him, so Julian does not feel strongly homesick.

13. Julian is an only child, so he has no siblings.

He has a great relationship with his parents! He loves them very much, and his parents answer him the same. Although they were a little worried when they found out that their child was engaged in dangerous adventures, they reconciled themselves, because the son is already an adult boy and decides his own fate.

14. Galaxy sword, and improved version - Infinity blade

15. He can't choose, he loves all his animals

16. Pumpkin. And not even because it is one of the most expensive crops. But because the pumpkin, in fact, is a symbol of autumn, his most beloved and colorful season. In addition, it is fashionable to make many different dishes from pumpkin.

And, well, he also loves apples. Where possible, he plants apple seedlings on the farm.

17. Yes. He likes to explore various ores and gems in the mines, and these materials will help him build many useful things for farming. He also believes that as a member of the Adventurer's Guild, he should reduce the number of monsters in the mines for the safety of the valley. Of course, he makes an exception for the Shadow people after some events, but the fact remains.

18. Julian cooked in his first year... not much. Well, Joja's constant ready-made meals and a banal lack of time did not give him the opportunity to cook for himself often. But when he got used to spending more time at the stove and using his own crops in cooking... Then even Gus would praise him for the delicious vegetable stew, crab cakes and other dishes.

19. Fall 🎃🍁🌽🍁👻

20. From hats - his straw hat and fur headphones. From rings - the connected slime ring and burglar ring. From shoes - his leather boots, which Julian improved with a sewing machine (thanks, Emily)

21. Grandpa's farm

22. Farming, mining and combat

23. Winter is usually a great season to go on adventures and into the mines more often. Although Julian spends every winter weekend either at home with his family or in the Saloon surrounded by his friends.

24. He has a well-furnished cozy wooden cabin. So if someone needs to live on his farm for some reason, there is always a place (even if he also has a guest room at home, there is another little house, just in case)

25. Julian had a very ordinary life. Well, apart from some of his magical manifestations and the ability to see the mystical, which even his parents thought that the boy just had a rich imagination. Due to a slightly unusual appearance (heterochromia of the eyes) and unusual interests, the boy did not have friends, only his parents were his best friends. A gifted, smart and kind boy who just had the misfortune to make friends in his hometown and in Zuzu city. But he make friends and found happiness in Stardew valley, so life is not so bad after all.

[fuzzydreamin]

🧏‍♀️ 🌵 🍀 🍿 🩹 🧸🍒 for Nora & Al?

🧏‍♀️ DEAF SIGNING GIRL - do they have any disabilities? (if so) what are they?

✪ Nora: Outside of getting some PTSD after the bombs and Nate's death/Shaun's kidnapping, Nora is fine.

She does lose a leg (half - around knee) in the future though, but that's post the main series and part of a small series of after-events. She gets a cool synthy prosthetic but she has pains and phantom limb stuff.

✝ Al: ADHD, and a bunch of trauma they got after leaving the vault. She's also slowly dying of radiation poisoning.

🌵 CACTUS - what is a sore subject for them?

✪ Nora: That she feels she was a failure for not really achieving anything during her time as a JAG lawyer before giving it up to have Shaun. She wanted to help end the war but in the end she didn't do anything and lost everything. She was just a cog in a failing machine and ended up reduced to a simple number in an experiment done against her will.

✝ Al: The vault, their father, pretty much everything that happened shortly after they left 101.

🍀 CLOVER - do they believe in luck? are they lucky?

✪ Nora: To a point. Nora is very much situated in a "if you want things to happen you have to make them happen yourself" viewpoint, but she wouldn't say that luck doesn't play a part in some things. It was sheer luck that Nate was holding Shaun and not her, after all.

As far as being lucky, Nora is unlucky enough to get into plenty of bad situations but usually lucky enough to get out of them too.

She'd make a decent gambler, with a mix of strategy and enough luck on her side.

✝ Al: Asking what Al believes in, regarding anything, is a tricky question. They're fairly neutral on these things, neither fully believing in anything but having seen too much to write it off either. Luck and chance just seem like a regular part of nature, the chaos of living.

Al isn't very lucky themselves, often wandering right into bad situations and only barely skimming through, usually with lasting effects.

🍿 POPCORN - do they like being the center of attention or more in the shadows?

✪ Nora: Depends on what she's going for. If she needs peoples attention she has no problem going and getting it, but if she's trying to size everyone else up she might linger for a moment first before making her move.

✝ Al: Shadows. Al can shoot the shit with most people, but crowds and prolonged social activity isn't usually her style. They'd much prefer being the person behind the one in the spotlight, looking on from their safe spot.

🩹 BANDAID - do they have any prominent scars? (if so) how did they get them? do they try to keep them covered?

✪ Nora: Nora starts off the story with just a thin line on one arm from a car crash. By the end of the story she has several scars and modifications, including a long scar just like Kellogg's across her face and a heart-shaped bullet wound on her left collar bone. She can't hide her facial scar, and she doesn't want to hide or remove the heart-shaped one -her only tattoo is a thin lineart around the scar to emphasise the heart shape, with an arrow through it (yes, it's about Nick).

✝ Al: Their whole body is littered with scars and burns from everything they've been through. I'm not sure of any significant ones because I've yet to go back and play through 3 to decide if she has any of note.

🧸 TEDDY BEAR - what are their thoughts on children? do they have any / would they ever have any and home many?

✪ Nora: Before marrying Nate and having Shaun, Nora didn't really want to be a mother. She didn't not want it, she always liked kids, but she was just more focused on her work and goals and felt it would disrupt her life too much and that she wouldn't be suited for motherhood. Deciding to keep Shaun was a big decision for her, and something that changed and molded who she would become.

She loves her children dearly and would go through hell and perhaps even become the devil for them if she felt it was the only option to keep them safe. She does turn on Father Shaun in the end, but it's not an easy decision for her to make at all, and she'll forever be haunted by him.

I've said before that being a mother is a big aspect of Nora's character, and my AU's often revolve around different circumstances relating to her parenthood, such as who she has (more)children with and how or why.

✝ Al: Al always wondered what having a bigger family would be like in terms of having their mother live and possibly give them younger siblings, but never had any ideals for having children of their own.

Preganacy and childbirth are pretty big icks. She didn't want to go through either and felt wrong just imagining it. In the vault it was sort of a looming inevitability that they would be required to contribute to the vault population at some point but they avoided thinking about. She was pretty sure no one wanted to do that with her anyway. She hoped.

Now they don't have to worry about it so much, since even they can't live in their body anymore.

🍒 CHERRIES - a random sweet headcanon.

✪ Nora: She can sing. She used to sing to Shaun even before he was born, and would sing with Nate who also loved music and could play various instruments. Sometimes she'll hum along with the radio as she travels.

✝ Al: Al goes out of their way to make time for any children she comes across in her travels. Al always has the 'kid at heart' perk in-game. They play games with the kids and will give them snacks and trinkets they've collected.

[thisisforthemoms]

Coping mechanisms and support structures

Navigating the mental load can feel isolating, but there are strategies and supports that can make a significant difference. Here's what experts suggest (slight eye rolling here..do these experts have kids?) for managing this often overwhelming burden.

### Building a Support Network

Dr. Lisa Feldman, a psychologist specializing in maternal mental health, emphasizes the importance of community. "No mother is an island," she states. "Building a network of support not only divides the load but also provides emotional sustenance. This can be other parents, friends, family members, or even community groups. Remember, asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness."

Support can look like arranging playdates with other families, which not only gives children time to socialize but also provides a space for us mothers to connect and share experiences and resources. Social media and local community centers are excellent resources for finding groups that resonate with your parenting style and challenges.

The only issue I see with this is: A lot of mothers - especially single moms, don't have said network. Family members live further away, friends are not on the same timeline as you if their kids are not in the same age range as yours, and friends without kids...well they are not able to understand why spontaneous outings are not that manageable for us moms. But yes, actively searching for people who can relate and who we connect with, supporting each other when we feel overwhelmed and alone has proven to be very helpful.

I know for some it can be difficult reaching out to strangers, but know you are not alone! There are so many others who feel and think just like you, who are looking to connect with people who understand them and or going through the same things.

### Effective Time Management

"Time management is crucial for reducing stress," notes Mark Robinson (again with the eye rolling...does this man have children I ask myself..), a life coach with a focus on single parents. "Using tools like digital calendars can help us mothers keep track of appointments, school events, and work deadlines all in one place. Additionally, setting aside specific times for planning can prevent last-minute scrambles and ease the mental load."

Simple strategies like preparing meals in advance, organizing clothes and school items the night before, and maintaining a regular routine can also help manage daily tasks more efficiently. This I find to be true. I do feel less stressed in the mornings when I know I took care of the morning prep the evening before.

### Self-Care and Mental Health

Julie Tran, a social worker, stresses the importance of self-care. "Taking time for yourself isn't just about relaxation; it's about preservation," she advises. "This can be as simple as taking a short walk, reading a book, or practicing mindfulness. Regular self-care is essential for mental health and helps you recharge to face daily challenges." But the financial aspect of self-care is often ignored.

When single mothers are not financially equipped in order to make/buy time for said self-care, self-care becomes another task due to planning around the kids’ schedules, household chores, etc. Self-care time has to be tightly scheduled. And even when lying on a massage table, 25.000 tabs are running on high, and your brain doesn’t just shut down on command. No matter where my children are or who is spending time with them/watching over them my thoughts are always with them and their well-being, and hours ahead for when they are back with me. This makes it impossible to "just take a break".

### Community and Policy Advocacy

Campaigns like "Mother's Health" have successfully advocated for increased funding for maternal mental health services, demonstrating the power of community and policy advocacy in supporting mothers.

### Educational Programs

The Austrian education system has initiated programs aimed at redistributing household responsibilities to alleviate the mental load on mothers. These programs are crucial for educating the next generation about fairness and shared duties within the home.

### Conclusion

Understanding and supporting the mental load carried by mothers is essential for healthier families and stronger communities. In Austria, where the traditional and modern blend uniquely, the challenges and solutions may be specific, but the need for awareness and action is universal. Let's continue this conversation, share experiences, and work together to lighten the load.

[father-time-and-baby-new-year]

happy 200! i’m so glad to see your blog grow, it’s one of my favorites and i adore all your writing. i’ve never cried so much and i love the kind of unsettling feeling you write in your fics, it’s perfect in the category of yandere and dark content. in particular, i loved your drabble about shigaraki mourning over a dead reader and i’ve reread that one too many times to count haha! as for asks for headcannons and drabbles, it would be amazing to see that with bully!eren especially since he was such an awful person to the reader. i’d love to see him suffer honestly, but if you don’t want to write it, that’s completely fine! once again, i’m so proud of you for hitting 200! that’s such a huge milestone and hopefully, there will be many more in the future! :)

SYNOPSIS: bully!Eren has to navigate the world without you.

Pairing: Bully!Eren x Fem!Reader

A/N: I can't even explain in words how much I CHEESED at this message like my grin was ear to ear. can't explain how many times I read this. It singlehandedly made my day anon, and to repay you for my happiness....here is some angst. this is a slightly different route than the shiggy one but I hope it still suits you <3

TW: mentions of death, past dubcon/noncon, mentions of trauma, bullying, alcohol addiction, drunk driving, abusive behavior, revenge porn, nonconsensual photography/videography, mentions of infidelity, angst, so much of angst, violent behavior

WC: 2.5k

It's not like Eren had been doing a lot of soul-searching. He's not delusional enough to label his half-assed epiphany of "maybe I'm a shitty person" as soul searching.

It's just the conversation with his very sick mother burned holes through the back of his mind. Carla had asked about you and why you don't come by the house anymore. How she missed baking with you in the kitchen, and how you sweetly smiled whenever you would see soft creamy peaks form in the meringue.

Eren felt like he was swallowing needles as he assured his mother with false truths, that nothing was going on and distance between childhood friends is natural, and if it means so much--ok ok he'll bring you over.

He stays until he sees her chest slowly rising and falling into a gentle asleep. He touches the tip of his ears, unsurprised by how hot it was.

Eren, when you tell a lie, the tips of your ears turn red.

You're not at school the next day. Or the day after that. Or the day after that.

Guilt is not an emotion he feels often but the events of the past weekend replay in his mind. It was just a dumb party that Floch threw, and he was surprised to find you cornered by a trio of thee dunderheads. Like a distorted fairytale, he swept you away from the bad guys like a knight in shining armor, to only shove you in an empty room and demand compensation for playing hero.

Fuck, with that big mouth, you would think that you'd know how to suck cock.

Use your tongue stupid slut. If you use teeth, I'll shove this dick in your ass without any prep.

No, I don't care, you're taking all of it.

There's a video on his camera roll. How could he not record it? You're sobbing, mascara running down your cheeks, looking so beautiful and ruined with jizz smeared at the corner of your mouth. He was brutally fucking your mouth, making you take all of his length.

Breathe through your nose dumb whore. Or else you're gonna run out of air.

You were pleading with whatever garbled sounds you were constricted into producing.

Breathe through your fucking nose. This is for your sake. Otherwise, I don't mind face fucking your lifeless body. You'd be more useful that way anyways.

Eren is conflicted with muting the video because he can't stand to hear himself like that. But he didn't want to miss out on your pitiful whines.

He remembers the distraught expression on your face when he was finally done with you. He tucked himself inside, and sneered, "I've got a girl coming here. Get lost." You looked so fucking distraught. Why? All he did was make you suck his dick. He didn't even fuck you.

He should have. Eren thinks grimly when he stares at your empty desk on the first day you didn't show up to school. He's gotten off to the video more than enough times than he can count over the weekend, and he was aching to see your pretty face twisted into a terrorized expression when he flipped up your skirt to grope your ass.

Kindly, Eren decides he'd allow you to have a rest day. But the second day, Eren pays a visit to your house finding it dark and locked, like no one was home and hadn't been there for a while.

On the third day, you're declared missing.

Your incompetent workaholic mother who finally came home and decided to give a damn reported you missing to the authorities who had scratched their heads because as far as they knew, the pivotal 72 hours were up.

Paradis was surrounded by forests. No one wanted to say it, but they were all thinking it. If you got lost in there, chances are you wouldn't make it out.

Eren wasn't always this admired and fawned over. He had his fair share of behavioral issues that frightened people (not you though, not then at least, not when you were children, and you still came back every day to play).

But when he channeled that anger into sports, there was somewhat of a star in the making, especially for some small-town boy. He was becoming extremely popular, and that's nice and all, but at the end of the day, he has a mother whose health was taking a sharp decline. He was constantly under stress, stress that he took out on you.

Where did his favorite stress-ball go?

It's all fucking surreal. Having detectives in the school. Not that there were many students to question (because christ, did you even have any friends after Eren turned everyone against you?).

Eren was questioned. He can't help but mirthfully chuckle. Maybe this was your grand plan, maybe you were able to finally sort out a mountain of evidence against him. If you were going to fuck him over, didn't you want to see it happen with your own two eyes?

The dark-haired boy wishes that was true. If you had gotten your revenge, would you be here? No, revenge isn't the right word. If you got any justice for what he made you suffer, would you come back?

Hi, I'm Detective Hange. I would like to ask you some questions today. You're Eren Yeager, right?

Yes, that's me.

How do you know ___?

We were childhood friends. We're uh, we're not as close anymore.

When was the last time you saw her?

Friday night at Floch's party-

-Floch Forster right? There were a number of kids there from your school.

Yeah. It was a big party. She uh, doesn't usually come to parties but she was there that night.

You were the last person to be seen with her. Other kids have said that they saw you and her entering a room together, and then only her leaving the said room.

[Sigh] Yeah we sorta...hooked up.

I thought you said you guys weren't close anymore.

You can be not close to someone and still hook up with them.

But you guys were close once right?

Yeah. Once.

The dark-haired boy asks if he was under any suspicion. The detective waves their hand in a dismissive gesture, “If her diary tells us anything, it’s only that she really liked you.”

Were detectives even allowed to divulge that sort of information? Eren doesn’t know but the stray detail that they offered off-handedly made him feel like he was swallowing needles.

At that point, Eren honestly still doesn't believe you're gone. You had a habit of running away, even when you were little kids, but you always came back.

Still, he participates in the search parties with a renewed vigor, even going alone in the forest with a flashlight on most nights.

And he's just so fucking tired. The darkest crevice of his mind almost wishes you were dead because this ignorance was just agony. Almost. Because he still clings to the feeling that one day, he’ll stroll into class and find you in your seat in the back of the class, looking out the window like some cliche shojo manga protagonist.

There are folders and folders on his phone. Albums. The most recent one is dedicated to your crying face as you were choking on his dick. Earlier albums are composed of creepshots of your panties, of that obscene o-face, of your skirt flipped up and your ass cheeks, pictures of your cleavage, videos of you thrashing as he dunked your head into toilets like a villainous middle school bully.

Pictures of your neck covered in hickeys, your naked breasts, ass cheeks striped with red after getting spanked, your leaking cunt, just endless and endless media dedicated to pieces and pieces of your body like you were never a whole person.

The earliest ones though tell a different tale, from off-guards to your drooling face as you napped in the middle of the day.

He has a favorite picture. Your eyes are watery from the cold, snowflakes stuck between lashes, nose and cheeks flushed red, and you're smiling. Smiling right to the camera. Right at him.

"Eren, are you taking a picture?" You asked, bouncing in place, giddy that it was finally snowing.

"Not of you, shut up. Get out of the way." His voice is gruff but not harsh.

You laughed and jumped into frame anyway, and the bright streetlamp behind you made you seem like you were wearing a halo.

He wishes he had more pictures of you being...yourself. Because now your crying face displayed over countless pixels haunt him. But like a fucking degenerate, he still jerks off to all the nudes he coerced from you. Sometimes he cries when he's jerking off which is probably the most pathetic thing he's ever done. This is what you've reduced him to.

He hates the sound of his own voice.

Breathe through your fucking nose. This is for your sake. Otherwise, I don't mind face fucking your lifeless body. You'd be more useful that way anyways.

Eren goes through the motions of life without really feeling like he's in the moment. Seasons change and time flies. His mother dies, and his withdrawn father dies a year later. He proposes to Mikasa because it's something he was always supposed to do. She loves him unconditionally, so even when he doesn't put any effort into the relationship but proposes, she says yes hoping he'll change and be a good husband.

He doesn't go to his parents' funerals because they're already dead. What's the point. He doesn't visit the candlelight vigils in your honor either. After tearing his ACL again and a somewhat traumatic injury, he kisses his pro-football career goodbye. To be totally honest, he's relieved. Because he had gotten quite bored, and maybe he was looking for excuses to quit the entire time. It's not like you'd be cheering on the bleachers anyways.

Mikasa has an affair, more out of a desire to see her fiancé feel something for her as opposed to any burning lust. But when she asks him if he's ever cared at all, with tears springing out of her eyes, he's just calmly drinking his fifth of whisky.

The dark-haired man doesn't even look up, "Let's break up."

"Is this about her, huh? Fucking get over it already Eren. She's GONE. And you have some big fucking audacity moping about her death like you weren't making her cry in the bathroom stalls every fucking day you piece of shit."

"Get out."

"You know what, I bet she killed herse-"

SMASH

The dark-haired woman doesn't finish her rant because the whiskey bottle smashes on the wall next to her head, sending glass everywhere and staining the carpet amber. She's unharmed, knowing it wasn't Eren's intention to hit her but Jesus Christ, what a monster.

She packs her bags and leaves the town like she should have a long time ago. All her friends had left years before and she stayed behind because that's where Eren was. She thanks her lucky stars that they didn't marry.

It's funny because he had always imagined himself being the first to move out of their small town, but he's the one staying. He can't leave this place. feels too tethered to ever leave. Every diner and liquor store is saturated with memories of you. He remembers buying cigarettes and exhaling the smoke to your face to piss you off in empty parking lots.

Maybe he stays in case you'll come back.

Eren's days consist of alcohol-fueled hazes. He doesn't know how his liver is still functioning. He doesn't know he's still alive after crashing his car into a tree when he was drunk out of his mind. He was on his way to get some more vodka.

He barely recognizes himself in the mirror anymore, not that he looks at himself much. His hair is long, nestled around his shoulder because he couldn't be bothered to cut it, dark circles under viridian eyes, and a perpetual stubble on his jaw.

His parents had left quite a sizable inheritance so there's no need to work but he's good with his hands. Likes crafting up birdhouses and cabinets, and occasionally does odd jobs around the neighborhood, never charging the elderly.

He's under the sink, tinkering with a wrench against the pipes when he hears the old lady coo at him.

"We're so lucky to have you Eren. I'm surprised a handsome young man like yourself doesn't have a special lady. The girls must be lining up at your door!"

The dark-haired man winces, and offers no comment, knowing that that the older lady was susceptible to long tangents.

"You know, we're getting a new neighbor." Eren grunts as a response. "They're young, I've heard. Isn't that exciting? Oh my, Eren! I think they're gonna be living in the house right next to yours..."

He tunes out the rest of the conversation because doesn't really care. He just hopes his new neighbors are quiet.

It's Sunday noon when obnoxious noises of moving trucks and people wake him up from his deep slumber. Eren's annoyed to wake up despite the fact he's probably been sleeping over 15 hours. He oscillates between getting too much sleep and getting none, his sleeping habits completely dependent on his dreams.

His nightmares are too visceral, visions of your corpse asking him if he'd enjoyed hollowing your soul with his teeth.

His dreams are achingly sweet. You in your prom gown, shining so iridescently like diamonds were sewn into the silk. He's dancing with you, holding you close, and then after you guys go to your favorite diner and gorge on burgers and milkshakes.

There's a peal of distinctly feminine laughter that stirs up Eren's senses. He's so pathetic, was the mere sound of a woman laughing getting him excited?

He sighs. He thinks of the whore he's frequently visited because of her resemblance to you. Hair color, skin color, face shape--with enough alcohol, he could really convince the person beneath him, was you. Maybe it's time to give her a call, but she's gotten so fucking needy and he hated how her voice didn't match yours.

The green-eyed man peers from the lace curtains, irritated by the brats playing on his lawn. A full family next door? Great, just what he needs.

The friendly knock on his door breaks him out of his daze. He contemplates whether he should answer but on the second more muted knock, he lets his feet guide him.

He turns the knob.

And Eren Yeager completely shatters.

Because it's you isn't it? You're the person standing in front of him? He can hear what you're saying but he doesn't really register it, soaking in the cadence of a voice he had long forgotten because all he had were pleading whimpers and frenzied moans stored on his cell.

He's shaking. Is he dreaming? He's dreaming, right? He knows it's you. You're older, far more beautiful than he's ever seen you. You have a different hairstyle, wearing clothes he would have mocked you for, and there's this joyfulness within you that makes you glow.

There's a mess of emotions electrifying in the pits of his stomach from euphoria, anger, and dread. He could feel his skin growing clammy like he was about to vomit at any second.

"Hey, are you all right?"

Doe eyes full of concern peer up at him. He voices out the syllables of your name like a desperate prayer.

You tilt your head to the side, "How do you know my name?"

[ylenia-pron-eeleneea]

I read on tumblr a lot of hate for Sir Phillip Crane.

I just want to say that many anti Phillips have never read anything about the regency era, they don’t even know what the 19th century is but simply turned on Netflix and expect to find unicorns.

Let’s start from the main point: yes Bridgerton is inclusive Thanks to Netflix that added the story of Queen Charlotte, but only that. The rest of the story, however, is that of the 19th century: there are the same diseases, the same social injustices, bigotry and ignorance as that time.

You could then identify the whole show as a kind of What if.

Eloise is therefore like in books: she is intelligent, acute and would like to study how men do it. Over time and above all maturing as a woman she begins to reduce the idea of marriage, especially seeing that she has now remained the only one to be unmarried in the family and also because she had always had the idea that in any case it is despite everything Penelope would always have been at her side like spinsters. But when this does not happen, Eloise realises that she has to face the truth of things: she is 28 years old, she is a woman and she is actually alone because she has always had very high expectations.

For those who say that Philllip is a rapist:

Sir Phillip instead finds himself overnight not only a heiress of Romnay Hall, who belonged to his brother, but also framed in a marriage without love is with two children, without any experience on how to be a husband and a parent. He tries to create a love relationship with her wife but fails miserably, he even gets to have sex with her after childbirth but she is depressed so she doesn’t have this great ability to understand, so she lets Phillip do what he wants. Phillip, however, does not know that his wife is not able to understand, because he has no idea what depression is since we are in the 19th century and therefore thinks that he is consensual but then understands it from the fact that Marina behaves like a raped woman. Sir Phillip gets angry but a lot with her but a reality is angry with himself because he hadn’t realised that Marina didn’t want him. However, after that event it will never touch it again.

For those who say he’s a bad father

Simply in the 19th century it was normal for a father to stay away from his children and for education to be given by the teachers and very often it happened that children saw their parents even and only once a day before bed, only after a few decades did things change, but Sir Phillip was raised in that method and rightly thought it was normal. Anyway, he makes his hammer even if his father was terrible, he is not violent with Oliver and Amanda and very often seeks dialogue that for the times was a rather modern thing. He doesn’t even think for two seconds of remarrying not for himself, for love as a human being should want, but puts his children before his own happiness.

For those who say that Sir Philip and Eloise are not good with each other

Really I ve to write it?

1) Phillip literally treats Eloise as an equal, not as a servant or as women were typically treated at that time, which has always been what Eloise has always wanted in a man, someone who had passions or a little character: in fact Phillip like Eloise has a sarcastic and dry humour even if calmer and more shy.

2) Eloise with her expansive and alive being makes Phillip really happy after years of life spent with a depressed woman and I assure you that living with a mentally unstable person who is a mother to your children is not really a cruise. Eloise, who is one of the strictest people in the world, compromises because she knows that he is in the end a pure person.

3) Read the book I m tired

[gladerwolfstarkimagines]

Imagine being Azula’s favourite friend who she recruits first. The two of you have always had an unspoken attraction which neither of you were brave enough to acknoweldge...until you save her life and Azula decides to reward you

Background

You and Azula attended the academy together and had initially started as rivals. You were an above-average fire bender and because she didn’t know you Azula saw that as a threat. So she made it her mission to ruin your life when one day she found you arguing with Zuko. You didn’t hesitate to yell at him or point out his faults and from that moment on Azula knew she’d misjudged you. Azula be-friended you and you became a part of her group. Over time you became her favourite. She trusted you and could feel your loyalty to her, which was something she grew to respect more and more as Mai was compromised by Zuko and Ty lee became even more whimsical. You soon became inseparable and as the friendship grew it began to feel like more...you realised you liked Azula as more than a friend. You enjoyed every second you spent together and thought she felt the same. The tension between you grew and although Azula would grow flustered around you when you flirted with her she never reciprocated your feelings openly. You were heartbroken but understood that falling for the princess of the fire nation hadn’t been a very smart decision on your part. So needing some space to mend as soon as you graduated from the academy you joined the army. It hurt to be around Azula every day and to know you could be something great together if only your nation was more progressive. So you ran away from the situation and didn’t see Azula for years. You managed to stop thinking about her constantly after a few weeks and soon your heart didn’t feel as broken anymore...but you knew deep down you still cared about her. The princess would always be your first love. 

Your POV

The army was tougher than the fire nation academy for many reasons. For one your name, reputation and grades didn’t matter once you passed through the doors. They didn’t care if you'd sparred with the best fire benders or got the highest grades in combat skills for ten years, you were reduced to a number and treated as one. You hated every second of it but the alternative was to return to your family and you’d take anything over that so you stuck it out. 

One day all the recruits were ordered to wear their best clothes and report to the large training hall which could only mean one thing. Someone wanted to buy troops. High ranking generals or rich businessmen could hire trainees for missions or any jobs they needed completing. The buyer could choose who they wanted after watching you all in training and you would then decide if to accept or not. You took every opportunity you could and so stared straight ahead for inspection, trying your best to look hirable when a voice broke your resolve. "I’m looking for something in particular" Azula told your trainer and you only just managed to keep your head forward but a small smirk broke out on your face. Azula spotted you and walked down the line slowly before stopping in front of you. "Well, well who do we have here?" she asked. You looked up at her and matched her smile "long time no see huh?". Your trainer was horrified at the way you addressed the princess and rushed to yell at you when Azula cut him off with a laugh. She took your arm and you hugged her tightly. Your stomach exploded in butterflies and you clutched her tightly, you’d missed Azula dearly. "Your highness i don’t know what...i’m sorry for this one’s behaviour" the trainer started obliviously and Azula rolled her eyes "are they all as dumb as you? Obviously i know y/n". You smirked and Azula was spurred on by that beautiful expression she’d missed. "You really have no idea who she is?" Azula asked laughing "this is y/n l/n, her father is friends with my father and she is a personal friend to the royal family. To hear you haven’t treated her appropriately is very displeasing" Azula frowned and you smiled as your usually cruel and horrible trainer shook. "I’m sorry we had no idea who she was! We will treat her better, promote her actually" he babbled. "No that won’t do" Azula said "and that wont be necessary, y/n will be leaving with me for a job and won’t be coming back here". The guard hesitated "i...you can’t just take a recruit". "I’m not but i could" Azula growled "i think you’ll find it’s more y/n quits". "She can’t quit" the guard replied “she made an oath” and Azula raised an eyebrow in response "are you tell me what i can do? Are you telling a noblewoman what she can do? Any debt she owes you will be wiped by my command, understand?" Azula barked. The trainer paled but nodded "yes princess" and bowed his head. "Good" Azula nodded and she strode with you right out of the front doors. 

Azula brought you to the lodgings she was staying at in the nearest town and you were amused to see it had been given the royal treatment. Red everywhere, freshly polished surfaces as far as the eye could see, gold and silver decorations lay on every available service and of course a large portrait of the fire lord hung on the wall. Over a lavish dinner Azula told you the mission making you realise you’d accepted and left the army without even asking for any details. You were fine with hunting the avatar and Zuko with Mai and Ty lee but you also recognised you would’ve accepted almost any mission Azula gave you because you’d been so happy to see her. Azula had always had this effect on you and time apart hadn’t done anything to lessen that. You were as much in love with her now as you were the day you left two years ago. 

After dinner Azula led you to your shared apartment, it contained two bedrooms with ensuites and a large living room which you were pleased to see and you sunk into the sofa happily. "Your hair’s shorter" Azula commented suddenly and you nodded touching it self consciously "yeah it was a target in sparring". Azula scoffed "seriously? Don’t they teach the other recruits proper fire bending moves as opposed to childish tricks?". You shrugged "they told us to win by any means. That it doesn’t have to look good so long as you win". Azula laughed again "amateurs all of them! Of course it should look good". You smirked "well when it comes so easy to you" and glanced over her. Azula shrugged but had a large smile on her face "well I suppose I have been blessed in that aspect". You laughed again and smiled "this is nice". Azula smiled too "it is" and you locked eyes for several seconds before she looked away slowly. Azula stood up abruptly "we should get some sleep we’re moving on foot tomorrow to go get Ty lee and then Mai". You were excited at the thought of seeing your old friends and grinned "great! Also don’t think i didn’t notice you came for me first" you called as Azula made her way towards her room. She halted and you smirked "I always knew i was your favourite but really Azula to make it so obvious" you grinned and Azula paused. You walked to your own room and Azula finally responded "i always made it obvious you’re my favourite, it’s nothing new" and went into her room.

You stepped into your own room and leant back against the closed door blushing vividly from the encounter with Azula. You’d spent all your time in the army trying to convince yourself your relationship with Azula was purely platonic. That the fact your heart sped up whenever you thought of her or how you dreamt of her often was just because you were close friends. You managed to convince yourself you weren’t in love with Azula and that she didn’t feel anything for you either but less than a day with her and you knew that was a lie. You couldn’t deny the way she made you feel and how she smiled at you in a way she never did with anyone else...as much as it made you nervous your realisation also excited you. You couldn’t wait to be around Azula again and felt a happy glow spread over you. You settled in your bed, a smile still on your face and burrowed into the exquisite cushions. You expected to fall to sleep easily but a while later you were still awake. You frowned confused as to why. You were happy, you were with Azula and the bed was comfy so why couldn’t you sleep? You figured maybe the bed was too soft compared to what you were used to in the army so went into the living room to try the sofa. You laid down and realised this was better, more like the beds back at the military. You had just closed your eyes when Azula’s door opened. "Trouble sleeping?" she asked and you nodded "i think the bed’s too comfy". Azula laughed "i thought the opposite, really y/n your taste has worsened in our time apart". You shrugged "it’s better than what i’ve been sleeping on for the last 9 months". Azula lay down on the sofa next to you and you looked at her. You didn’t ask why after finding her own bed soooo uncomfortable she came to lay on a sofa barely a foot from where you were and just enjoyed the silence. “So, anything else i missed you didn’t put in your letters?” you asked. Azula hadn’t written to you much at the academy and honestly that had been a good thing. You’d have just missed her more than you already had but she did send brief updates once a month. Azula nodded "probably tons, i couldn’t write often". You didn’t point out she wrote to you on the first of each month religiously instead you turned on your side to look at her. Mai and Ty lee had also written to you but you’d noticed compared to their letters and the changes in their lives Azula’s had been...well boring. You felt almost sorry for her, you’d all moved away to different things but Azula had been stuck at home with a father who was cruel, the ghost of a cold mother and the memory of a banished brother. Azula quickly discussed some events that had happened and then also turned on her side to face you. "What about you then? How was military life really?". You shrugged "not as i expected". "I knew that job would be awful" Azula commented "why did you stay so long then?". You sighed "well i liked some parts of it, the physical training was similar to what we did in the academy which i liked, the mental tests were better, they made me use all my brain". "That’s a first" Azula chimed in and you rolled your eyes "i liked those parts of it...could’ve done without the abuse from the trainers, food restrictions and ban on leaving". Azula raised an eyebrow "remember what i always told you y/n no self-pity, you could’ve left at any time. You chose not to". You thought Azula sounded a bit angry when she said that but you shrugged "i could but that would have meant going back home not coming back to the capital and I’d rather fight all the trainers at once than that" you said through gritted teeth and Azula saw you’d tensed. She recalled you never got along with your family but she hadn’t realised they were part of the reason you’d taken such an awful job so soon after graduation. "They hated my move to the capital and said if i failed at all they’d have me back and married, i had one shot to escape them, there’s no way i’d give it away because i didn’t actually like what i’d chosen". Azula didn’t comment she just watched you conflicted, she hated self pity and weakness but you were so like her, she’d have done the exact same thing in your position. "But you did leave" Azula commented “you left to come with me” and you looked down "i did...". Azula saw the way your face changed, filling with worry and she actually felt slightly guilty. You’d left instinctively for her when she asked, no matter what it might mean for you in the long term. You did all that for her and it proved to her again why you were her closest ally.

Azula laughed and you looked at her confused "y/n do you really think i’d make you give up your job for a small mission?". You frowned "what?". "Your parents won’t be angry because this a much better job, you’ll be paid more and you’re working with me" Azula said pointedly. "They can’t say anything against that, as long as you’re with me they can’t touch you" she smiled and you grinned at Azula "you’d vouch for me?". Azula nodded "of course, i want you with me and that’s what i’ll get, i don’t care who your family are they’re not taking you anywhere ever". You were equally touched and shocked "ever?". Azula nodded "well obviously you might not be here forever but they’re never taking you back to tie you to a marriage, i’ll just keep coming up with excuses to keep you in my company until you’re too old and then they’ll have to leave you alone with me" Azula explained and you smiled "sounds perfect".

Azula laughed and met your eye, seeing how intensely you looked at her gave her chills. Azula had missed you greatly in the capital but honestly she’d let you leave without a fight. She sensed a growing attraction and longing for you which she knew had to stop. So she let you go figuring some distance would be good but as soon as she needed allies the first face in her mind was yours. The second she saw you she knew she’d made the right choice but she also felt the attraction just as suddenly. Laying here staring at you made it more apparent than ever and it scared Azula. She blushed and turned away from you, facing the back of the sofa "try and sleep" she commanded "we'll be up early". 

You didn’t comment on how much Azula was blushing or how she’d chosen to sleep out here with you. You just smiled and closed your eyes basking in the feeling of all she’d said and the safety of her. “Good night Princess” you whispered and you fell asleep almost instantly.

The next day you reunited with Ty lee and then Mai. Ty lee had launched herself at both you and Azula when she saw you and the same occurred for Mai. Mai grunted and hugged Ty lee begrudgingly. "I thought you ran away to the circus?" Mai asked Ty lee and she nodded "i did but y/n and Azula showed up and well they called louder than the universe" Ty lee smiled. "Wait y/n and Azula, isn’t the circus closer to the capital than the military?" Mai asked looking from you to Azula. "Yeah so?" you said confused and Mai shrugged "nothing just seems like it’d make sense to go to the circus first then military but hey i’m sure Azula had her reasons for coming to get you first" Mai smirked slightly. You didn’t look at Azula but Mai and Ty lee exchanged a look at the matching blushes you were both sporting, some things never change. Azula recovered first and pretended Mai hadn’t said anything about the two of you and began explaining her plan. You joined in after a few seconds of recovery but still felt giddy at Mai’s words.

Throughout your trip you and Azula grew closer and closer just like you’d done at the academy. Although neither of you spoke about it you felt drawn to one another and Azula acted differently around you. She sought you out more than the others, always kept the closest proximity to you and paired Mai and Ty lee and you with herself whenever you had to split into teams. As you fell into old habits all the past feelings came back and you began to worry at all the dangerous situations Azula was putting herself in just to please her father. She’d infiltrated Ba Sing Sei without any backup besides you, Ty lee and Mai which terrified you. Of course her plan worked but still you were so grateful Azula had been unharmed and managed to take over the whole city without any mishaps. You hoped it’d be smooth sailing from there but of course she wanted her brother and the avatar too. You did exactly what she said to try and help her but you couldn’t escape the feeling something would go wrong. Azula had left to go and face the avatar all alone apart from her dai lee agents and you couldn’t get her out of your head. Azula had put you in charge of making sure the earth king and his bear were looked after but you wanted to ensure she was okay so left it to Ty lee and Mai. You followed the secret passage you’d seen Azula take and found your way into a massive cavern filled with people. You spotted Azula fighting the avatar and saw her shoot him with a lightning bolt. He fell to the floor and you gaped at the fact Azula had likely just killed the avatar. The water bender with the avatar then went into a rage and flew through the air using a massive wave to catch him. Azula smirked ready to engage with her and you saw Zuko standing beside her. You were surprised to see Zuko beside her, never thinking she’d actually manage to get Zuko on her side but of course she was a master at manipulation. You smiled at all she’d achieved when you noticed Azula’s uncle Iroh was approaching them. He had flames in his hands and was looking right at Azula who was fixed on the water bender. You gasped at Iroh’s intentions and how nobody was aware of what was going on behind them. You broke out into a run and leapt down the cliff as quick as you could. You were getting closer but you still weren’t close enough. Iroh raised his hands and you went into panic mode. “Stop” you yelled and threw your own fire as Iroh released his own. Your strike managed to hit his off course and it hit a rock beside Azula. Azula and Zuko both jumped and Iroh turned to you. You were now stood blocking his path to Azula and you sensed he still wanted to take her down. You anticipated his attack and blocked it instinctively before firing back your own. Iroh was much stronger than you so you were heavily outmatched when suddenly two flames burst onto the scene. Azula sprang in front and began attacking her uncle savagely while Zuko helped. You were again slightly surprised by Zuko but quickly joined in. With three on one even the dragon of the west couldn’t last long and with a final hit from Azula he fell to the floor. “Seize him and throw him in a cage” Azula spat and walked past him to you. “I thought I told you to wait upstairs” she said fixing her intense gaze on you and you shrugged “I wanted to help and I think it’s a good job I did”. Azula shot you a look at your boldness but you could tell she was more amused than annoyed. “You appear to be correct” she replied curtly before walking past you. You smiled after Azula, admiring how happy she looked and why wouldn’t she? She’d taken over Ba Sing Sei, possibly killed the avatar, brought down her uncle and convinced Zuko to ally with her, all in all it had been an excellent day and Azula had proved herself a force to be reckoned with. You began following her when you saw the guards walking Iroh in the opposite direction. You were going to look away when you noticed he was still staring at Azula. You could feel his anger and knew what his intentions were, he meant to finish the job. In the blink of an eye Iroh burst out of his restraints, threw his guards to the side and took a stance. “Azula get down” you yelled sensing the electricity in the air but he had an excellent shot at her and she had nowhere to go. Instinctively you threw yourself into the path of the lightning. 

Azula also responded instinctively. She conjured her own lightning to meet her uncle’s when she saw you running into the fight, You tried to raise a wall of fire but there wasn’t time, you got hit by the bolt and collapsed. Azula only just managed to direct her own bolt away from you and felt her heart beating rapidly. As the smoke cleared Azula saw your body on the floor rage consumed her. She conjured a huge amount of electricity and sent it all at her uncle. He tried to block it but Azula’s bolt sliced through his defences hitting him square in the chest. Azula didn’t even check to see if her bolt had met its mark, she knew it had so rushed to your side. “Y/n” she yelled and she knelt beside you staring at the smoke coming off your back where the bolt had hit you. Your uniform was partially melted and Azula could smell the burning flesh strongly. "I need water” Azula yelled grabbing you and trying to feel for a pulse. She felt one and felt her own breathing somewhat stabilise too. "Now" Azula yelled and people rushed forwards. Azula poured the water over you "it’s okay" she told as you winced as she poured more. "We need to get her into the pool" she called "someone help me get her to the water". Zuko appeared and helped Azula carry you to a fountain. You were semi-conscious which made Azula hurry even quicker, she wanted to reduce your pain as soon as possible. Azula climbed into the fountain first and told Zuko to pass you to her. She took you carefully and laid you on your back floating. Your eyes closed as you passed out and Zuko called for a doctor. Azula clutched your by your arms keeping you close to her in the water "you will not die y/n" she snarled "you will be fine do you hear me?". You didn’t respond. 

Later

You woke up face down on something soft and tried to move your face away from it when shooting pains erupted along your spine. You felt like your back was cracking open and groaned loudly. "Careful y/n" you heard someone say and saw it was Ty Lee. "Ty lee? What happened?". "You got burnt" she explained "on your back..luckily Azula cooled you in time to stop any long-term damage but it’s still really sore so be careful". You reached for your back and flinched at the slightest touch of it. "Stop" Ty lee told you "Azula said i’m to watch you and make sure you rest, apply more soothing cream on it every three hours and just basically always make sure you're okay!" she told you cheerfully. You shook your head "Ty lee i’m fine you don’t have to sit guard over me" you tried to sit up and went pale from the pain. "Don’t do that" Ty lee cried rushing to your side "if you want to get up i can pile some pillows in front of you for you to lean on. I don’t think you can sit up for a while". You pouted annoyed but asked Ty lee to bring you said pillows and managed to pull yourself up onto your elbows "so what happened? Tell me everything". "Well thanks to you we managed to stop Iroh escaping and hurting Azula, we took Ba Sing Sei and the avatar is dead". "Wow" you said surprised "That is... a lot". Ty lee nodded “Ow and Zuko’s back on our side". You nodded and smiled "I bet Mai is happy". Ty lee grinned too "she is i haven’t seen her since we started for home". "We’re on our way back?" you asked and Ty lee nodded "yes but Azula said me, you and Mai are to stay with her even after we arrive back in the capital, she said she still has a need for us". You smiled laying your head down blushing slightly, Azula had kept her promise, she wasn’t letting you go. You sighed happily and Ty lee smiled "y/n?". "I’m just glad to be going back" you smiled "i think we'll have lots of fun". You had been dozing when the sounds of the door made you jolt awake sending shooting pains down your back. You winced but prepared yourself for an attack until you saw her. Azula raised her hands as she saw you jump and she smiled "just me". You relaxed "Azula, sorry i was asleep". "Don’t apologise you need to rest after what happened, i just wanted to come check on you. We'll be in the fire nation in a few hours". "That’s good news" you smiled and Azula nodded "how does the back feel? Ty lee says you’re doing as well as can be expected" Azula’s eyes drifted to your back and you froze. You were now very aware you were laid on your front with only a blanket covering your bare torso from Azula’s eye. Azula stepped closer and you rushed to explain and stop her inspecting you. "I’m fine" you told her "the burns aren’t too bad, they hardly hurt at all". Azula raised an eyebrow "then you won’t mind me having a look?" and stepped beside you. She reached for the blanket and you grabbed her hand with an uncomfortable strain "wait, i lied...i don’t want you to see it, Ty lee says it looks bad. It’s in the blistering stage and yes it hurts but everything has already been done for it and me so you don’t need to see it or check on me". Azula titled her head to one side as you couldn’t meet her eye and she sighed sitting on the floor beside your bed. "It will scar but unlike Zuko you can wear yours with pride" Azula said forcefully and you looked up at her shocked "with time i’m sure it will simply resemble a tattoo" Azula explained. You turned on your side to look at her, something you’d practised with Ty lee and could now manage. "Ty lee told me you did as much for me as you could...i can’t really remember it but..". "Do you remember jumping into the path of lightning for me?" Azula said "without protecting yourself or even any concrete attempt to do so, and what for?". You sighed thinking Azula was angry at you "i...i know it was reckless and stupid, it went against everything we were taught at the academy but I don’t know Azula, i did it without even thinking. I saw it heading for you and you weren’t ready! It would hit you and i just did it without hesitation, i know it seems stupid and emotional but i don’t regret it Azula i’d do it again" you told her sighing, feeling she wouldn’t understand. "I know that might sound stupid...why i’d do that for you but Azula i..." you started as Azula cut you off "y/n". Azula gently raised your head with a hand helping you to look at her. You were confused by Azula’s gaze, it was soft but at the same time intense, you couldn’t recognise the emotion, was she angry? Happy? Excited? Apparently it was somewhere in the middle. Azula leant down to you, hand on your cheek as she ghosted her lips over yours. You felt a sensation like water being thrown over you as Azula kissed you softly and quickly before pulling back "i don’t completely get it but i understand" she smiled blushing softly "i think I can imagine why you did it" she said looking away from you "thank you for saving me". You were speechless, Azula was thanking you? Azula understood why you did it? Did that mean she liked you too? She’d just kissed you so of course she did! Or was that what she thought you wanted? Azula had been used all her life, did she simply think you did this in order to make gains with her? 

Azula smiled slightly to see your brain short-circuiting at her actions and stood up. "i just wanted to make sure you were okay so now I know you are i’ll let you go back to sleep. I’ll wake you when we’re there". You nodded still confused and watched Azula walked away. You weren’t sure what had just happened but you knew you had to make Azula realise you didn’t do this just to use her. "Azula" you said suddenly "is that...what you just did...if that was my reward or what you think i wanted from you after today...i didn’t save you because i was expecting a reward or anything from you so what i’m saying is you don’t have to compensate me if you don’t want to. I didn’t do it for any reason other than to keep you safe". 

Azula blushed suddenly and felt her emotions swirling, she realised she was happy. To hear you express openly your desire for her safety filled her with excitement and she realised nobody had ever cared for her before like you did. Azula nodded slowly "that is welcomed news y/n" she smiled "but i didn’t reward you like that as a forced compensation either" she told you "although my intentions were personal and selfish i suppose”. 

You smirked slightly and nodded "good...i mean fine with me". Azula nodded "i’m glad we understand each other, good night y/n". "Good night princess Azula" you said savouring the words and Azula’s eye twitched but she maintained her calm expression and bowed leaving. You lay back giggling as realisation (and the medication you were on for the pain) set in. Azula had kissed you and told you she didn’t do it because she thought she had to but because she wanted to! For selfish reasons!!! You wrapped yourself in your blankets and didn’t stop smiling even in your sleep.

____

Is it just me who loves the idea of being in a secret relationship with the princess of the fire nation? I feel like Azula would excel at sneaking around the palace and would like rebelling against Ozai for once

[what-the--curtains]

There Are No Wolves In the Desert

( Oberyn Martell x f!reader, Robb Stark x f!reader)

Part 1 - The Wolf and The Outsider

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Summary: The series of events that have lead to you being in Dorne and why you can never return home.

Authors notes: Oberyn is not in this chapter but he will be in all subsequent chapters! This part is mainly context corner to build up the character! The reader is a distant relative of the Targaryens but I only mention hair colour and eye colour everything else will remain non- descript! Let me know if you want to be tagged (or untagged) in this story 😊😊

Tw: Swearing, violence, mentions of and allusion to sex (none depicted), war, murder the usual GOT stuff, major character death (I wonder who it could be👀👀)

Word count: 5.7k

Tagged: @evyiione

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Kings landing

Cersei tilts her head, eyes thinning as she gazes out over kings landing, the moon illuminating the gold plated roofs of the upper class, the stench of the poor unable to reach her here. Jamie sits on the bed she had shared with her late husband, slowly re-donning the white armour of the king's guard. He turns watching as the summer breeze blows the ends of her golden hair. His shin guard is clipped into place just as three short knocks sound out against the wooden door, filling the quiet air of the night. Sighing loudly Jamie stands up to answer the door, a smile forming on Cersei’s lips as she trunks to greet the visitor.

“Littlefinger, to what do we owe the displeasure,” Jamie asks, sarcasm dripping off every word.

“Funny… I thought knights usually waited outside the bedchamber of those they swore a sacred oath to protect,” he queries smiling, the candlelight illuminating his prominent front teeth.

“Is it done,” Cersei asks through her teeth, tiring of the man’s desperate attempts to hold some semblance of power.

“Yes. Not a soul left alive that isn’t loyal to house Baratheon... or is Lannister perhaps more apt. The north is ours for the taking now the young wolf has fallen, and Sansa is under control here.”

“What of his wife?” she asks, walking towards a nearby table, decanting wine into a goblet turning with eyebrows raised. Littlefinger was not the only one in Kings landing with ears everywhere. She had heard a rumour, one she wished to squash as soon as she can.

“His widow, you mean,” Jamie states from the door frame, dissatisfied at being left out of the conversation.

“Gone, left in the wee hours of the morning from what I heard,” Cersei says, eyes staring into Littlefinger’s, locked in a strategic game of mental chess.

“So she’s alive, ” Jamie adds, despite his previous statement being ignored.

“Not for long,” Littlefinger states , brushing him off.

“Who saw her leave?” Cersei demands, a hint of concern slipping through as she swirls her wine around in the glass.

“No one left alive,” Littlefinger reassures

“So she's...” Cersei begins,

“She’s set to land in Dorne two days from now, she will be dealt with when she arrives. She is…inconsequential.” Littlefinger finishes.

“And so ends the reign of the wolves,” Jamie remarks, as Cersei raises her glass toasting the gods.

Dorne (2 days later)

You watch the docks appear along the horizon as the ship begins to reduce its speed. The sea spray from the trip spattered across your skin was yet to dry, cooling you off, as the southern sun bares down onto you. You lick your lips, the salty taste leaves you parched in a heat the likes of which you’d never known. You’d never been to Dorne, though you’d heard stories of it’s fair weather, people and architecture, and you were eager to see if they held true. You’d heard the wine here was the sweetest the world had to offer, you planned on returning home with some, even if Dorne was merely a stopover. It was not a honeymoon you were here for, no you were here to complete a task of utmost importance. You came in search of the so-called dragon queen at the behest of your husband. He wanted to see if the rumours were true and if they were he hoped to make an ally of her. He had sent you in hopes that your shared lineage, though distant, would work in his favour. The Targaryens held family in high regard, especially with so few of them remaining. You smile as the shore comes into view, the birds above singing to your arrival. The golden hues of the late afternoon sun paint the tents of the markets in the docks. A sense of bliss rolls over you as the crew ties the ship to the dock. It would be one of the last moments of peace you would know for some time. Your feet make contact with the ground, legs wobbling slightly at being back on solid ground. You stumble slightly and a man with a blue beard catches your elbow.

“Winter is coming,” he whispers and you look up as he discreetly passes you a note. You open it. The letter is long and the script rushed, but seven words stand out ‘the King in the North has fallen’ the sheet slips from your fingers and you drop to your knees. “Quick, we haven’t much time,” he says dragging you up, as the first arrow pierces the sky, hitting the captain of your ship in the neck.

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Winterfell, 7 years prior (age 17)

You had always stood out in the north, a caveat of the family you were born into, all of you were outsiders here. Your grandfather was a Targaryen, second cousin to the mad king and when war broke out he led a small rebellion that tried to push back the Baratheon troops storming the capitol, but to no avail. Your father and his brothers were there that day, fighting alongside him, but they were outnumbered, and no amount of skill would keep the combined Starks and the Baratheon forces at bay. After the capitol was taken, your grandfather was hanged and your grandmother took your father and his brother and feld while Robert butchered any descendents of the Targaryen line that would weaken his claim to the throne. Your father had split from his family opting to head north, while they trekked south. He never saw them again. Upon his arrival in Winterfell he built a small homestead outside the city walls and sought work, thankfully the distinctive hair and eye colour had skipped him and he could blend in with the northerners. He found work as a stone mason, crafting formidable architecture admired and paid for by the nobility. The payments allowed him to move up the social ladder and while he remained in the forest he had gained the respect of the elite and was accepted as one of them. His hands soon grew tired of creating. They craved the weight of a sword and so he gave up masonry and offered his services to Ned Stark. Your father became a confidant to the King in the North as he moved up through the ranks. He ended up training many of the soldiers, and for a while, even Ned’s own sons. His proximity to the crown brought him into the path of your mother.

A ball was held in celebration of their eldest child's first name day and your mother was in attendance representing the Tyrells. He spotted her across the room, and to this day he swears the sun shone down on her despite being inside a hall. He approached her that night and they married during the long summer, your brother Illirion was born a year later, then a year after that it was your turn. Their final child, your youngest brother Rhaevar was born two years after you, thus completing your family unit. While the honeyed eyes and dark toned hair of the Tyrells presented well with your brothers, the Targaryen traits that had initially skipped your father came through in your genetic composition. Your hair was as white as the snow that came to the north during the winter, and your eyes a lilac similar to the foxgloves that grew in the spring. You attended a local school until you reached the age where girls were no longer allowed to study. Whilst there you heard whispers from the other children. Every now and then a comment of “murderer” or “traitor” would be shot your way, much to your confusion. It wouldn’t be until years later than your parents would tell you why such comments were made. After school ended officially you continued your education at home and studied the methods of healing that your mother had been trained in while in Highgarden.

Your father insisted all his children learn how to defend themselves, the north was a dangerous place after all, and the threat of war loomed large. The stability between kingdoms was teetering, it had been peaceful for too long, a storm was coming. You’d proven to be of high talent, had it not been for your eldest brother's size you would have been the strongest fighter in the family. Illirion married at 18 to a noble girl of high status, and it wasn't long after that you lost many of your friends to marriage. Some of the pairing were good, some bad and some even for love. Despite being propositioned a few times, you had no interest in being a bride.Your parents did not mind now that your brother had secured a wife and would be able to care for you once they passed. Your father also had it on good authority that you all were to be cared for so long as a Stark sat at Winterfell.

You were acquainted with the family since childhood, though outside of parties you rarely saw them. During the gatherings you and Sansa often gossiped together and Arya would sneak you into the courtyard and beg you to train her. The time spent with them was greatly cherished. Their brothers were often gone during such events, off showcasing their prowess to girls of higher status than you, women who would one day be their wives. Little did you know, Jon and Robb had been told to stay away from you so as not to ruin your reputation. That rule had been followed until one day when a particularly cruel comment from a noble girl sent Arya running directly into your path.

You were out tracking a wolf that had killed one of your family's horses. It wasn’t revenge you sought, but its attack on your homestead meant it was getting closer to town, and growing far too bold for your liking. You’d stopped your trek once you realized it was headed back towards the wall. Approaching your house you see Arya sitting on a log outside your house near the fire pit. Her feet swinging, intermittently kicking at the dirt below.

“Arya?” you question placing your gear down on the ground as she turns to face you, her nose running, eye slightly red.

���Is Rhaevar around? I wish to play” she demands, her childlike nature apparent now more than ever.

“I’m afraid he’s gone off in search of the children of the forest, but perhaps we can find something to do together?” you offer sitting beside her, she was upset, evidently so.

“I have no want to stitch,” she huffs, causing you to laugh at her attempt to insult you.

“Good neither do I. I’m no good at it anyways,” you admit and she looks up at you “Well what do you wish, Arya? Perhaps I can be of assistance.”

“I wish to know how to shoot my arrow so it hits the target every time. I don’t care what Robb says, Jon thinks I can do it so I want to try.”

“Well, I can help with that, come I’ll show you a trick. You’ll hit it every time. Prove your eldest brother wrong,” your comment earns a rare grin from the youngest Stark daughter. After a few goes she gets the hang of it, hitting your practice targets one after the other.

“By the gods,” you chuckle, you’d never seen such natural talents before. Caught up in your admiration of her gift you fail to catch her turning to aim at a farther target still. The arrow soars through the air as two horses approach your homestead, the arrow only just missing them.

“Arya!” you shout, grabbing her arm “You must be careful!” you exasperate as she looks up to you her mouth ajar. The sound of the horses fast approaching.

“Get behind me,” you murmur, pushing in front of her and aiming the bow true.

“It’s Robb!” she shouts, pushing against you attempting to make a run for it. Despite her efforts to throw you off balance you manage to grab her arm, dropping your weapons in the process.

“Why are you running?” you ask, not releasing your grip on her scrawny arm.

“Because I don’t fit in!” she finally admits.

“Well a secret Arya, no one fits in, we're all different, it's what keeps life interesting and what will keep you alive in your years to come,” you say watching as she stops struggling a softness suddenly coming over her features.

“She said I had a face like a dog,” she whispers, chewing on her lip, eyes down. The cruelty of children was always surprising to you.

“Well I’d find it hard to find someone who does not see the tenderness of a pup, or the strength and beauty of a dire wolf. Either way, You have talents, beyond what beauty can measure, ones that will never abandon you,” you reassure. She sniffs and looks up at you offering a rare smile. You see her shift back into her tough persona, the scowl returning to her face as she runs towards the horses belonging to her brother and who you assumed must be his ward Theon. You watch the eldest Stark, now two years your senior drop down allowing Theon to help Arya, as he strides towards you.

“We’d be lucky to have you in our ranks, if you can teach her to nearly take my head off from a mile away,” he laughs, easing your nervousness slightly, his northern accent heavier than you had remembered.

“I did remind your sister to be more careful lest she be tried for treason, or worse yet, get me tried for treason. As for my services, they are always at the will of the Starks, if you wish me to join the army who am I to refuse,” you say, tilting your head and offering him a smile.

“Women are not allowed in our ranks, lest of all those who look like you,” he charms, an unexpected compliment from a man you rarely got the opportunity to speak with.

“Not yet, but rules are meant to be broken after all my Lord.” You retort, eyes meeting his steel grey gaze causing an unexpected chill to run down your spine.

“Are they?” he laughs, the warmth of it causing a sudden heat to rise within you, counteracting his gaze.

“You should remind your mother of that when you return Arya to her,” you offer, as he hands you the arrow that almost took off his head.

“Thank you for returning my sister, wolves have been prowling about, heaven forbid they got to her before us,” he says, concern etched in his face.

“The wolves have moved north, I do not believe they will return this way, and Arya is stronger than you give her credit for,” you assure, his brows raising at your competence.

“I know, and I think she does too, I fear she’ll outlive us all,” he offers, rubbing the back of his neck, the two of you standing there for a moment, the smirk that usually danced replaced by a nervous grin. His head dips down before turning back to the horse, but he stops one last time swivelling round to face you.

“My lady,” he calls after you.

“Yes my lord,” you say, turning back to face him.

“I look forward to our next meeting,” he offers sincerely.

“As do I,” you say curtseying in such a way to make him smile before you both head back towards your respective homes.

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2 years later (age 19)

“What is it?” you ask your father as you lay down your quiver and the pair of small pheasants you’d brought home for dinner. He takes a long drag of his pipe, gaze glued to the treeline. “Father tell me?” you stress, knowing he only ever smoked when bad news had arrived.

“Illirion, he’s...” He stammers and drops his head letting out a strangled sob. You shake your head at the suggestion. Your brother had gone down to kings landing a week ago to serve as a bodyguard to Ned Stark who had been summoned at the behest of King Robert Baratheon. Arya and Sansa had gone with them, leaving Catelyn and the boys in Winterfell, Robb currently ruling in his place.

“Ned Stark would never allow…” you begin, sure your father had once again fallen trap to the rumour mill.

“He’s dead, they’re all dead, all of them...” he whispers, dropping his head to his hands.

“What happened tell me everything,” you stress, pushing your own sentiments aside for the moment.

“Beheaded, Ned for treason, for the murder of Robert Baratheon, his greatest friend, unlikely story. They killed your brother as Ned’s head fell. Arya, is missing, presumed dead, Sansa is a prisoner, to be wedded to that horrible snot nosed inbred Joffrey.” He continues in fragmented sentences.

“Mother?” you question.

“She’s in bed still, hasn’t left, I dare not tell her the worst of it,” he admits tear streaked eyes meeting yours.

“What the worst of it?” you ask, unable to think what could possibly be worse. “Lean on me father, there is no else left for you to confide in, lend me some of the burden,” you stress rubbing his arm in encouragement.

“War is upon us and each family must provide a soldier. Since my knee… I am no longer able to fight, the Starks know this. So your youngest brother…” he starts, but a sob catches in his throat stopping him.

“He can’t go, he’s too…” you begin, swallowing as you try to think of the right word.

“Soft” your father offers.

“No, he’s just not skilled enough, at least not in the ways of the sword. Skilled as he is as a mason he wouldn’t last a minute on the battlefield,” you pause, only one path was clear to you “Let me go in his place,” You say, before you have time to process what you had just offered to do.

“No,” your father says without hesitation.

“Let me go and you may end this life with two of three children. If he goes, I will be the only one left and I could not bear it,” you say pushing back tears at the thought of losing another brother.

“Your mother...” he begins

“Knows I was the best fighter. I had the best teacher in all the seven kingdoms after all,” you say nudging him with your elbow. He places a reassuring hand on your shoulder, before pulling you into a tight embrace.

“When do I leave?” you ask.

“Tonight. It’s a good thing your brother isn’t tall, his armour will fit you, take this helmet. Do not remove it, keep your hood up, any trouble and cut off their cocks, or else I will.”

“I'll see you again, I swear it,” you state, with every intent of keeping your promise.

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The battle rages forward, men fall around you, but you refuse to meet a similar fate today. Your sword penetrates through the opening of a Lannister’s armour turning quickly to slice the backs of the knees of another soldier, both falling in tandem. You hear a horse whinny on your left and you turn to see Robb Stark fall from his horse becoming trapped beneath the dying creature. You weave throughout the battle towards him. Your blade intercepts the longsword of an enemy soldier just as it’s about to penetrate Robbs armour. You drop your shield to Robb and you push up against the attacker. Releasing your force he falls forward and Robb pushes the shield up hitting the man’s face swinging his head back. Grabbing the man by his hair you slit his throat. You drop your sword and pull Robb out from beneath the horse. He grabs your shoulders giving you nod before returning to the forefront of the battle. As the horn of retreat sounds you celebrate the victory with those around you, surviving the first of many attacks.

You're walking back to the tents when you hear a familiar voice call out to you.

“You, wait,” Robb demands, chuckling with those around him. You continue on your path hoping he was talking to someone else. “It is not wise to disobey your king.” He sounds out again, forcing you to turn towards him.

“Come now friend, we mean no harm. I wish to look upon the face of the man who saved me and invite him to ride alongside me.” he states.

“Perhaps he is too ugly to show his face, my lord,” one of his lieutenants states causing a laugh to erupt from the surrounding crowd of men except for Robb. Though a slight smile pulls at the corner of his mouth breaking the cold façade he’d donned since his father’s death. A moment passes then another until the silence is so prolonged you have no other option but to obey. Slowly you lift your helmet up your eyes meeting his for the first time in a year.

“A prize for the army, my lord?” one of the men questions, hungrily eyeing you up as he fervently steps towards you. Robb's arm stops him in his tracks and you draw your blade.

“Touch me and risk losing more than just your hand, I have fought alongside you. I am your equal. You will treat me as such,” you demand, your voice unwavering despite the uneasiness in your stomach.

“You have a cunt, you are not our equal, though perhaps in bed…” another from the crowd offers.

“Stop! Leave us” Robb orders, and the men retreat back towards the camp ground the sound of laughter and whistles picking up once out of range.

“I did tell you rules were meant to be broken,” you say, watching as he tries to suppress a smile.

“Well they certainly have been now” he chuckles, shaking his head in disbelief.

“Are you going to hang me, my lord? Or is it my King now?” you question, a bolder move than you should have felt comfortable making.

“To you it's Robb and no I am not going to hang you, but you are going to come with me,” he says offering you his arm which you brush by looking back at him to follow.

“How have you come to be here? Does your father know?” Catelyn stresses,eyes growing wide as she scans over you assessing the damage.

“My lady, yes, he does. You see when the war was announced and after my brother’s death, we knew someone from our family would have to fight. My father’s leg as you know isn’t... as it used to be, and my younger brother while talented in many ways, cannot hold a blade to save his life. My mother’s grief was already far too much for her to lose another child.” You say, eyes risking tears as she meets her gaze.

“So they sent you?” she explains to herself.

“Yes my lady I was the best fighter in the family, or the most skilled at least.”

“Well, we will not make your brother come to fight, but you cannot stay in the army,” she explains softly, hand running up and down your arms in reassurance.

“She saved my life today,” Robb interjects and Cat looks at you as you look at him.

“Then I am indebted to you.” She expresses.

“As am I,” Robb states the two of you not having dropped eye contact, much to the notice of Cat.

“Lady Catelyn, I am a capable fighter, but if you will not allow me to so, at least allow me to tend to the wounded or to serve you in some other manner. I am here after all, put me to use.” you say and she lets out a sigh.

“Well, if you believe yourself able to defend yourself, and if what my son says is true then I would be remiss to send you home, though you will not sleep out with the rest of the army, you will stay with me.” she says.

“And during the battle you will remain close to me,” Robb stresses “not for your protection, but for mine”

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1 year later (Age 20)

Robb watches as you kill another soldier, the sight never failing to impress him. You had remained close over the past year, both in and out of the battlefield. He kept you close at all costs, your company bringing him some semblance of joy, even in his darkest moments. Rumours swirled amongst the men and the other kingdoms, though nothing between the two of you had come to fruition. Due to the colour of your hair, the enemy soldiers had dubbed you the white wolf, in an attempt to link the Starks with the treacherous Targaryens. While the insinuations at your extracurricular activities with Robb pushed the narrative that he was impure, that northerners were savages, who did not abide by the values of the seven kingdoms.

As you wipe the blood from your eyes, an arrow catches you in the shoulder, the force knowing you back into a tree. Robb is at your side in record time, his hand stopping yours from pulling the weapon out.

“Medic!” he shouts, eyes not leaving yours.

“Go! you need to lead your people, I will be fine,” you emphasize and he shakes his head “Robb, it is a shoulder, nothing of importance lives there.”

“No but it is attached to something of the utmost importance.”

“Go you have a war to win,” you state as the medic helps you to your feet and brings you back across the line.

You sit in Robbs tent, despite your insistence at being treated in the same manner as the other soldiers, he had demanded you be brought there instead. A skilled nurse had removed the arrow from your shoulder just as you heard the rambunctious cheers of the men outside, victory had been secured. Unsurprising considering Robbs keen strategic mind, he was smarter than you'd have accredited him for in your youth. He enters the tent blood spatter still on his face, seeing you alive and fine he takes the moment to remove his armour. He pulls his undershirt off and walks to the water basin wiping himself clean of the sweat and grim coating his skin. Your eyes watch his bare skin intently, studying every scar, every freckle. He grabs a fresh cloth dunking it the basin and wringing it out before heading over to you. He kneels before you, staring up at you eyes telling you to drop the blood soaked rag currently held to your wound, and you oblige.

“I must confess I long hoped to share an intimate moment with you, though these circumstances are not as I imagined,” he says, gently dabbing at your wound, you smile at his concentration.

“And under what circumstances would you have hoped to be intimate with me, my king? At one of your fancy parties, in the secrecy of a barn, somewhere no one would know you had been with a Targaryen girl.” You ask trying to keep your eyes forwards and not at his muscular physique.

“Every man in Winterfell had dreamed of sharing a moment like that with you, though none have found any luck,” he says, standing up and walking back over to the basin.

“I have no need for a husband nor do I have the want to be wife,” you say, watching the muscles of his arm flex as he wrigns out the rag.

“and what about a queen?” he queries, as his hand braces against your thigh, continuing to clean your wound, his eyes still focused on the gash.

“Do you ask all your foot soldiers such bold questions,” you quip, laughing at the sheer absurdity of the situation.

“Only the ones naked in my chambers,” he retorts, eyes darting up a grin plastered to his face.

“A bare shoulder is hardly naked in your chambers,” you state, and he raises his eyebrows mischievously.

“My fondness for you was never allowed,” he admits, dabbing the cloth into a salve and applying it to the wound.

“Oh wasn’t it,” you ask as he looks up to you

“No, my mother feared one of us would ruin you,”

“A Targaryen In the north, perhaps it was fear of you boys being ruined.” you laugh, but when you look at him the tone has shifted.

‘When that arrow hit you, my feelings were confirmed, I no longer wish to be more than a few feet from you at any given moment. I wish to marry you. If you'll allow me”

“Don’t be stupid my king, you’re to be married to a princess from what I understand.”

“I'll be married to whom I please” he assures.

“Robb is that wise?” you question, unfamiliar with the high stakes games played with marriage.

“The Frey’s will recover besides, we’ve crossed their bridge already, and I have no love for anyone but you.”

“Love? We barely know each other,” you say.

“Only our whole lives,” he reminds you.

“I fear you’ll wake up tomorrow and regret your words, so I will not answer you tonight.”

“Then I will return to these chambers tomorrow morning and restate my intentions to make you my wife.”

“What will they say if you allow me to take your bed for the night?” you ponder aloud.

“I guess we shall see” he states, slinging his bloodied shirt over his shoulder.

“Goodnight my King” you offer, watching in amusement as he attempts to find the tents exit without turning around.

“It’s Robb. For you, it's always just Robb”

True to his word he returned the next day and asked again, and this time you accepted. You married a few days later under an old willow tree, with Catelyn and a few others standing witness. The morning after your wedding you awake in his chambers, the sun yet to rise. Robb snores faintly beneath you, the warmth of the fire sending a chill up your skin that had become exposed in the night. You scan over his features, a peacefulness you hadn’t before on his face. You reach over brushing the white patch of hair amongst the mass of soft brown curls on his head. As you do his eyes open looking over to you propping himself up on his elbow and learning over to kiss your forehead.

“What is it my love?” you ask, kissing his cheek, then his lips .

“I need you to do something,” he says, serious as always.

“What we just did wasn't enough, my king? How else may I please you tonight,” you offer hands dancing across his chest, he grins shaking his head slightly.

“You have pleased me in every way imaginable for the past year, and even more tonight. This favour isn't a pleasure of the flesh however, I need you to complete a task. You’re the only one I can trust,” he states.

“You shift up to face him, the furs falling off you slightly, “find the Targaryen girl. I wish to make an ally of her, to destroy the Lannister once and for all. You are likely the only family she has left, she may listen to you.”

“I'll do what I can, and I'll do it fast, I do not wish to be parted from you for long.” you admit as his hand traces over your back.

“Take this with you, that way i'll be protecting you even while we are apart,” he leans over grabbing his dagger, the one made for him by his father, offering it to you.

“Robb I…” you begin.

“Will return it to me a fortnight from now when you come back. I suggest we make the most of tonight, so you have another reason to return to me,” he states

“I'll always return to you, even in death,” you reassure and he wraps the blanket back over you pulling you tightly to his chest. And so as Robb took his seat in the halls of Walder Frey to watch his supposed bride marry another man, you were catching a boat destined for Dorne.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Present day (Age 21)

“Come with me now Lady Stark, your life depends on it,” the stranger says, pulling you to your feet and shuffling you into a nearby tavern ushering you quickly up the stairs. You see a pile of clothes laid out on the bed and immediately strip, all notions of decency erased in favour of time.

“You must disappear, make them think you are dead,” he says, averting his eyes as you change into clothes typical of local mercenaries.

“Who killed him, what happened?” you ask, needing some kind of answers.

“There is no time, and it's safer if you do not know.” He says eyes darting from you to the door.

“I have a right to..”

“The Freys betrayed you, everyone at the wedding is dead, you have no claim to Winterfell. The Lannisters have taken the North”

“Everyone at the wedding..” you echo, sitting on the bed

“Stay here..” the blue bearded stranger says, returning a few moments later with a cloak, sword and black dye in hand, placing them down and grabbing for the clothes and the dagger on the floor, Robbs dagger.

“That stays” you stress grabbingthe dagger from his reach.

“It’s too…” he starts

“It stays, it's all I have left of him,” you whisper harsher than intended, fighting back tears. He nods and you take it from him. You grab the dye from his hand and rub it through your hair, staining it a deep ember.

“Keep your eyes down, they're the only thing we can’t disguise,” he states

“Who are you, why are you helping me?” you question memorizing the man's face.

“You share a common enemy with powerful people. You have allies here. Goodbye Lady Stark I hope we meet again,” he says, and with a swift turn he exits the tavern leaving you alone with your thoughts. You wait a moment before donning the cloak and pulling up your hood. You walk out the tavern, putting as much distance between you and the docks as possible. Keeping your eyes down as men scoured the streets for the person you once were

[evolutionsvoid]

Ho boy, where do we even begin with these things? How do I write this entry without going insane? No real clue. I have to say that I try my best to keep things fair for all the species I write about, regardless if I like them or not. No one is reading my work solely because they want to know what my top ten favorite animals are, they want information! So even if I despise a certain beast, it is my duty to share straight knowledge and facts without steeping it in bias and personal opinions. However, thinking about this species gives me a headache, and it only gets worse as I delve deeper into the details. So I ask for the dear reader to forgive me if I diverge a bit or get a little negative in some parts. I don't mean to do that, but I can't guarantee anything! Now on to the Boracund! The Boracund are a mammalian species, with their relations tied to pigs and boars. With a porcine frame, a signature snout and those nasty tusks, it is easy to see how the three are alike. How they are different should be pretty obvious too, unless all your ham wears armor. Covering the top of the body, tail and upper limbs of the Boracund is a hefty layer of boney scutes and keratin scales. This home-grown armor is surprisingly durable, as it can withstand blades and even deflect arrows! Obviously it is used for protection, though the Boracund tend to use this defense more for other Boracund! This is because of those giant tusks that the Boracund possess, which can easily slice through flesh and gore a hapless victim. Both male and female Boracund grow tusks, but it is the male's teeth that grow to such an impressive, and deadly, size. When your rivals carry around such weaponry, armor is pretty much a must! The habitats they should prefer are in temperate climates, and they tend to be found in forests and surrounding areas. They like forests that produce a lot of mast (which means the fruit of forest trees, for those who don't know), as it provides a steady food source and also lures in other tasty treats. Like many members of the pig family, the Boracund are omnivorous, eating pretty much anything they can get into their mouths. With powerful jaws, razor tusks and a big appetite, there isn't a whole lot these fellas won't eat. Fallen fruits and nuts are a common meal for them, as well as small reptiles, mammals, eggs, and even carrion. Their snouts and teeth can also aid in digging up roots and tubers, which they will also happily devour. They are also capable of downing prey with the help of numbers, as this species travels in sizeable sounders. They rarely go after creatures larger then them and tend to only take advantage of the sick or weak. It is said that predators who live in Boracund territory must be fast in dispatching prey, lest a sounder descend upon the injured target and devour it. With the ability to take advantage of many food sources, it is easy to see how this species is so freakishly adaptable. What an utterly wonderful trait.    

  During most parts of the year, Boracund travel in these sounders, with them usually divided into male and female groups. The females sounders will possess multiple mothers with various litters of piglets, who all live under the watch of a matriarch. The male groups, however, have little leadership to them, working more as a friendly crowd that enjoy the benefits that sheer numbers bring. Their time is either spent searching for food, resting in their home shelters or grooming. Their version of grooming and hygiene is taking mud baths, as it helps cool their bodies as well as remove parasites. Things change up for all these sounders when the breeding season kicks in. When it is time to mate, the males grow rather irritable and obsessed, their family groups dissolving as they search for viable sows. Driven by the season and hormones, they scour the land for females, barely eating or slowing during their pursuit. When they find a female sounder, they begin to mark their territory. The piglets and other young members of the group are attacked and driven off, though the ancient matriarch is quick to protect them if things get too violent. Crazed males that kill piglets can incite the wrath of the matriarch, whose age and experience often makes them powerful foes. As long as the male does not cross this line, then they may remain with this sounder and attempt to claim it. Since the first male that enters this sounder is rarely the last, they must turn to defend their claim from rivals. Other males will soon arrive and they will fight to be the top hog. These battles are brutal and bloody, with tusks and hoof leaving terrible injuries. Even decked out in armor, male Boracund get pretty mangled during these fights. When the breeding season comes to a close, all viable females will be carrying, eventually giving birth to four to eight piglets. With a litter that size, and with that many females per sounder, you can see that this species has quite the population boom each season! Why, their reproductive rate is so high, its almost like you could harvest entire sounders and the population would bounce right back without hardly a stumble. How delightful. An incredibly interesting thing to note about the Boracund is that their breeding season can undergo a bizarre change every so often. A decade could go by with things going as normal, males running after females and what not, but then suddenly the next year will become something quite strange. After years of study, the consensus is that this unique breeding season is triggered by a high population of Boracund. When their numbers within an area reaches a critical peak, something in their bodies will be set off when the breeding season kicks in. This powerful change seems to only affect the males, if the females are involved then it is very subtle. When this switch is flipped in the males, their bodies undergo a terrifying transformation. Their armor darkens until it is almost black and their fur takes on a reddish hue. From numerous bony protrusions and pedicles that run along their body, velvety growths will begin to form. Much like the antler of a deer, these structures are growing something flashy and pointy, but it is rarely classy. They will grow all across the head and body of the male Boracund during the build-up to the breeding season, and you can already notice that they are growing agitated. The male sounders will break apart long before the season gets into swing, as they are driven into an angered state from the growths. Just as the season is about to start, the velvet will fall away, or rather be torn off in bloody strips. The furious males will rip apart this fuzzy sheathe to reveal a horrible dagger made of bone. What emerges from this gory ceremony is a beast covered snout to hoof in twisted, gnarled spikes. Bony jagged "teeth" now run on the outside of their jaws, while skewering spines line their backs. Bony spurs jut from their legs, while ivory wings sprout from their shoulders. The whole beast is now loaded with pointy bits and terrible weapons, which fits quite well for what comes next. Not only do their bodies transform, but so do their minds. It isn't so much a "transformation" but more of a "degradation." These males go absolutely berserk. The hormones in their body drive them to an even crazier state, which is further fueled by their gnarled bodies. You see, these bony growths aren't usually shaped to fit their bodies. Their formation is quite erratic, often leading to bony blades that hurt the very beast that wears them. I have seen a male Boracund who was so overgrown with these nasty things that they couldn't even open their mouth, the teeth-like formations grew around the jaw and forced it shut. Even then, its head was covered in gashes and bloody tears, as its attempts to open its jaw just caused its weaponry it dig into its own hide. Absolutely horrible! This pain puts them in a constant rage, and all this is directed into this bizarre breeding season. Now decked out in weapons and on the warpath, the males turn into rabid beasts that rip apart the countryside. They plow through the landscape in search of sows, but they are so blinded by their terrible state that they will literally throw themselves at walls in order to get to a female. What was once a fight between males to claim a group of sows has now become a bloody frenzy, with males shredding each other in the madness. Their battles seem to have no end in this state, they just tear each other to pieces. They lose any concept of surrendering or accepting defeat, they just throw themselves at each other until only one remains standing. Even the females aren't spared! Younger ones who do not have the strength to withstand such punishment can be butchered in the melee, slaughtered by the bloodthirsty males who have lost themselves to this agonizing frenzy. Eventually, the carnage will end and the season will finish. What males remain will lose their extra growths and revert back to normal, while the surviving females raise the new batch of piglets. This horrific breeding season is referred to as "Devil's Rut," when this species goes into this self-destructive state. It is believed that this event occurs to help regulate the population, only activating when their numbers reach a critical state. Too many Boracund could lead to all food sources being wiped out, which would leave them to starve. Reducing their numbers through this season, as well as cutting out those too weak to handled it, helps the population remain stable and strong. Thank goodness it takes years for such a thing to occur, right? RIGHT?!       I have to imagine that some folk have read through this entry and come to a realization. "Hey, Chlora," you may wonder, "you said this species likes temperate climates and lives in the woods, right?" To that I would say, "yes, I did!" With that confirmation you may reply "but I don't live near such a habitat, and yet I see the Boracund everywhere! Why is that?" This would call for a congratulations on my part, as you have read my entry and taken its word to heart. Thank you for your attention and mindfulness! Indeed, you have seen Boracund in a habitat I haven't mentioned and that is because, dear reader, THEY AREN'T SUPPOSED TO BE THERE! Boracund love temperate climates, they love forests! You know what else they love? EVERYTHING! Marshes, deserts, fields, grasslands, mountains, you name it, they stole it! Their ability to eat practically anything combined with their adaptable lifestyle and hardy bodies means they can live wherever they blighting please! There are populations of them scattered all across the globe, and every living thing that has to put up with them feels that presence! They strip the land bare with their feeding! They steal resources from other creatures! They tear up vegetation and plants that should have been safe from herbivory! They even chase predators away from their kills! They are a disease, and we cannot seem to freaking stop them! You slaughter a whole sounder of them and they just all pop back after the next breeding season! They reproduce so quickly and they don't go down without a fight! This isn't like the pig farm, you can't just round them up and give them the axe! They are armored, they are vicious and they are cunning! Kill one and the rest scatter into the wilderness! Set one trap and they learn to avoid that area! It is maddening! And to make it all worse is the fact that they undergo that Devil's Rut. When that kicks in, they are a threat to everything. They become insanely aggressive and incredibly dangerous. Driven by smell and pain, they will go after anything they see as a threat or anything they think is a female. Pig farmers have talked about these wild Boracund attempting to break into their own pens to get at domesticated sows, as they mistake them for their own kind. The damages are insane, and that doesn't include the fact that they can maim and kill anyone who tries to stop them! Crops are ruined and trips into the wilderness become dangerous. If you live in an area that is undergoing Devil's Rut, do not let your children outside of the town! These things are dangerous and they will attack anything they come across. Keep your saplings inside and don't even venture out there yourself! Cities and towns lock up their gates during these ruts and many warriors have been hired to ward off these crazed beasts. Good thing this only occurs about once every ten years! Whoops, did I say "ten?" Because with their exploding numbers, it takes half the time to trigger a Devil's Rut in areas they have been introduced! HOW WONDERFUL! They are a plague wherever they have been introduced, as the ecosystem is not designed to handle them! "So if they are invasive," you may ask, "How did they get here?" SO GLAD YOU ASKED Due to their large size, signature armor and impressive weaponry, there are some folk out there that would see them as a beautiful hunting trophy. Look at those tusks! Look at that armor! Think of how much meat we could get off that beast! What a dream, they think, AND THAT IS ALL THEY THINK! They just want to be the cool guy who has a big devil pig stuffed in their study so they can show off to all their friends and be like "look how cool and tough I am!" And then all their stupid friends would think "gosh gee I need one of these crazy beasts in my domicile so that I may too show off how big and cool I am!" And when you get enough people thinking that, then you get the idiots who think "well, all these people want to hunt this big awesome pig monster, why don't I import some for easy cash!" And then they do, and they build a hunting ranch specifically for hunting Boracund so that they can fill their coffers with all the money these showoffs will throw at them and then use none of that gold to BUILD A DECENT FENCE! Nope, just some posts and some boards, that is enough to keep these monstrous creatures contained! Lo and behold, they break out and vanish into the wilderness, where they may breed like rabbits and infest countless habitats! NOW THEY ARE EVERYWHERE, ARE YOU HAPPY NOW!? Oh of course they are! They are thrilled! "I can just go into my backyard and kill one, all while wearing my bathrobe! What's that? Dozens of species are threatened and entire ecosystems are being ravaged by these things? Well, who cares? I get to bag me a pig!" Those gall-headed weeds don't give an ounce of care for the systems they rely upon for their wonderful hobby! What about all the crop damage?! What about all the people who are vulnerable to these beasts?! Not every town has the means to ward them off, and the damage and injury that occurs is horrible! Markets raided, people attacked! It is insanity! It has gotten so bad in some regions that people have called them "Pig Dragons!" OF COURSE THEY DID! NOT ONLY DO THEY DESTROY THINGS, NOW THEY HAVE TO BEAR THAT CURSED NAME! You want a dragon?! I will show you a dragon! You all laugh at me when I talk about the "Dragon's Pig Program," but if I can get that going then there is hope! What better beast to help harvest these monsters than actual dragons?! These animals are a hefty source of meat and hunting them is crucial! If I can convince enough dragons to turn their attention towards this species for a potential food source, then their populations could be easily reduced! I think it is a genius idea, but oh no all the fancy aristocrats are like "Dragons? Near my land? Unacceptable! Those ugly beasts will cause so much damage!" UNLIKE THE HOG MONSTERS YOU PEOPLE BROUGHT OVER! You cause this huge problem and then stick up your nose at every solution! Just because it doesn't affect you! Well you listen hear you overgrown, blight-filled piece of rot! If I ever get my hands on you I am going to take that fancy hunting spear of yours and*   *No further text is provided, save for mention by the editor that several pages have been removed. Chlora Myron Dryad Natural Historian --------------------------------------------------- Behold! The long awaited Pig "Dragon!"  And by long awaited, I mean that I once offhandedly mentioned something about a Pig Dragon in a description I wrote years ago. I am sure no one remembers me naming such a thing, but my memory exists solely to torment me and couldn't let it go.

[moonlightchild-otome]

the real story of amélie from arthur’s route

hey hey! it’s been a long time! i have been quite busy these past weeks with finals and the summer break.

i also want to start writing hcs, so if you have any requests don’t hesitate to send them to me!

today i wanted to write about a story that i read not too long ago that really coincides with the evil character of amelie in arthur’s route.

a lot of people might have actually already heard of it, she is known as history’s most cruel murderer.

the person we are going to talk about lived in the period of victorian england and was sometimes suspected to have a link with jack the ripper, the serial killer who terrorized the inhabitants of whitechapel.

in other words, she is called the ogress of reading or the victorian ogress and the trial of these murders has been the subject of much attention, especially because she preyed on very young children. Let me tell you the terrifying story of a monster who disguised herself as a warm and loving mother figure

the story of the infamous amelia elisabeth dyer

an ordinary family

our story begins in 1836 in the port city of bristol in england. the hobley family welcomes the arrival of a fifth child, a lovely little girl called amelia elisabeth. the little amelia is very lucky, in a time when poverty reigns in the united kingdom she knows a respectable education, learns to read and to love poetry. however the luck ends quickly as amelia’ mother caught typhus, an illness that showed her a lot of psychological problems. amelia had to take care of her mother until she passes away from her illness. after her mother’s death, the girl loses contact with most of her family members. meanwhile, amelia starts seeing george thomas, a 59 year old man, much older than her, who was only 25 at the time (long live the sugar daddies!). they planned to get married and to avoid gossip, they both lied about their date of birth on the day of the ceremony. (amelia pretended that she was 32 and george 48)

during her marriage, amelia learned to be a nurse but she doesn't have time to forge a real career as her husband dies leaving her alone with their children who are still very young. it's already not easy to raise a child alone nowadays but imagine what it was like at that time when england was in the middle of the victorian period, the industrial revolution changed the shape of the cities and saw the emergence of new social classes. in london and other major british cities, poverty has invaded the neighborhoods and the poor have few options to get by. some live in workhouses which reduce them more or less in slavery for a mouthful of bread while others choose criminality to support themselves.

however, amelia remembers ellen dane, a midwife in her building with whom she got along quite. she had told her that to earn more money she had become a baby farmer.

it is a profession which does not exist any more today but was rather widespread in the 19th century. now, it should not be forgotten that this england inherited puritanism and considered that to have a child out of marriage was a horrible sin. if that came to be known, the young women concerned risked big and could lose their reputation and their work. especially that, at that time, one did not consider that the father had a role to play in the event of unwanted pregnancy. also, it was obviously out of question to abort except clandestinely which was at the same time illegal and very dangerous. all that to say that when an unwanted child came to the world most women preferred to give it up rather than risk public humiliation. but abandonment was also illegal, and none of them wanted to risk the death penalty if their actions came public. this is precisely where the baby farmers intervene. when a woman fell pregnant and did not want to keep the child, she had to put an ad in the newspapers and leave her child to a farmer.the baby would be taken care of and fed until the farm finds a new family. it was a sort of clandestine human trafficking, and sometimes the farmers even housed the mothers in their homes during their pregnancy in order to hide their big bellies.

the birth of the monster

soon, the ogress settles in reading close to london and publishes advertisements where she presents herself as a respectable woman to marry, capable of providing a healthy environment and filled with affection to the children that she intends to collect like the other farmers. she asks for money to be able to look after them. amelia quickly realizes that it is much more profitable to keep the money rather than to use it for feeding and educating the children. and so little by little the treatments that she inflicts on the children become more and more dire (spoiler: she doesn’t take care of them anymore). and even worse, she even drugs the children to prevent them from crying because of hunger. the kids often die of malnutrition and infantile diseases. it is absolutely terrible and yet it is far from being unusual, in fact orphans were very often victims of abuse and many of the baby farmers were far from being trustworthy people. a lot took advantage of the distress of the mothers ready to do anything to keep their secret and these so-called “baby farmers” would leave the children to die in order to pocket the money without any effort. when the mothers asked for news of their children, they often got no answer and when a family wanted to get a child back, the farmer gave them another one instead.

amelia very quickly became addicted to the drugs she used on the children as she couldn’t stand the crying and the presence of the orphans anymore. she decides to move on to a more radical option: directly eliminating the children she is entrusted with.

at first, she will choose to poison them and claim an infantile disease, but the doctor who came to attest the death of the infants shows himself a little suspicious (at the same time, she gives him a case every week or so :/). in short, the guy warned the authorities so that they could investigate on amelia. but no luck, she manages to get away with negligence with a simple sentence of forced labor. and moreover, she decided to opt for a more brutal method for her future murders. that is to say, she was going to strangle them as soon as she was allowed to keep them, pocket the money and look for a new child to start all over again. and this will go on for years, sometimes at the rate of six babies a day, no need to declare the deaths, she got rid of them herself, wrapping them in cloth or old clothes, and then she left to burn them in an isolated place to hide them or throw them in the thames. and when she felt that the authorities could trace the dead children back to her, she simulates a nervous breakdown and suicidal desires and runs off to a psychiatric hospital. she even tried to kill herself once by overdosing to escape an overly suspicious mother who was asking for her child. except that by consuming opiates she had become hyper resistant and the dose that she took was not enough to kill her. she then moved often and took on different identities to prevent the police from finding her and understanding who she really was and this little merry-go-round worked for a long time, a very long time, even, but not indefinitely...

ambush and arrest

in january 1896, a waitress named evelyna marmon gave birth to an illegitimate daughter named doris. she was looking for someone to take care of her and very soon she came across the ad of a certain mrs. harding who wrote "married couple, without children, want to adopt a child in good health in a beautiful country house, price: 10£”. necessarily for this young mother, it is a godsend and the two women contact each other. and here is what mrs. harding replied, "I would be happy to have a dear little girl, one that I will be able to raise like my own. we are a united couple of fairly good conditions. I do not want a child for the lure of gain but to accompany the comfort of the house. my husband and I love children but we do not have any. with me, this child will have a good house as well as all the love of a mother". at this stage you can guess that mrs. harding is in fact amelia dyer who took a false name and who continued with her macabre activities. doris gets taken from the waitress by “mrs. harding” who confirms by letter that the child is doing well, after that she doesn’t give any more news. spoiler: the child did not have more than a few hours to live. once the crime is committed, because yes, it’s done already. amelia covers the body of doris with another child in fabric and travels to the edge of the thames to throw them under the eyes of a man who seemed to observe her but who didn’t address a word to her.

in this kind of case, one wonders “where tf is the police??” well they were on the point of starting a very interesting investigation... on march 30th 1896, the police force finds the lifeless body of helena fry, a baby of hardly 15 months who floated on the waters of the river wrapped in a brown cloth. for the authorities, it is obviously a murder since the child was strangled. they later found on the cloth, a half erased writing which resembles an address. this address is amélia’s, who is now 58 years old; the police then trace her and set up a trap.

basically what they did was to use a young woman as a cover, she pretended to need a farmer to look after her child and as expected it was amelia who answered her directly. so that's how the police organized an ambush at the murderer's house. what first shocked the policemen was especially the unbearable smell which reigned in the house because of the decomposition of certain corpses, they also found meters of edging tape which she used to strangle her victims, and also telegrams testifying of all the adoptions made as well as letters of mothers who asked for news of their children. so yes, there is a lot of evidence to charge her for, especially as they found at least seven more bodies by dredging the thames after her arrest. the bodies clearly had a white mark around their neck probably because of the tape she used to kill the children with. we also know that about twenty children under her care at that time were missing but for the rest it's impossible to know the exact number of amelia's victims. in fact, it is estimated that in 20 years she would have killed between 200 and 400 newborn babies, that's why she is said to be the most prolific serial killer in history.

her sentence and death

in spite of this very important number of victims amelia will be accused for only one crime, the one of the little doris. except that she very quickly confessed a quantity of other murders and tried to commit suicide twice while she was incarcerated. the defense pleaded madness and because she had spent time in asylum the doctors that she had managed to manipulate were able to confirm that was unstable. she herself said that the children she had killed died peacefully; that they were called back by God who was someone who could love them more than anyone on this earth, she said that she had simply made angels and that one day she would sit beside the Lord Almighty. her breakdowns of madness always coincided strangely with the moment when the police approached, so we can think that it was more of simulation and calculation than true dementia. the jury took hardly five minutes to return its verdict, the crimes were so horrible that her mental state could not do much anyways.

amelia was thus condemned to the death penalty. on june 10th 1896, amelia dyer walks towards the scaffold, she decided not to appeal by hearing her verdict and wrote herself five notebooks of confession before her execution that she entrusted to a priest. she tells inside them to have taken pleasure in seeing her victims dying. before her execution, one asked her if she had any last words to pronounce but she answered that she did not have anything to add. at 9 o’clock sharp, the woman who was called the ogresse of reading was hanged. following these tragic events the controls of the adoptions and the activities of the baby farmers were reinforced, new laws were also put in place to protect the children and the mothers and the advertisements in the newspapers were supervised. that said, it still took a certain number of years before child trafficking was seriously supervised…

that’s all for the story! it is a very horrific case and i can’t even imagine what the children must have gone through. i also think we can all agree with the similarities with the character of amélie in arthur’s route.

[kru-sader]

What Others Think...

(Original short story)

Author's note - this is the first story I'm posting on Tumblr. Not my favourite but we needed to start somewhere...oh yeah - Do Not Repost anywhere and any kind of feedback is welcome.

Words- 1.3 k ////-

The fact that we live in a colony with such a diverse set of people, always irked me all the more when I never could find someone my age to play or be friends with. I resented that with all my being when I was younger. Only recently had I made peace with this reality, coincidentally at the same time as the pandemic completely destroying my social life at school too. And recently, these two younger girls decided to give my lonely self some company.

The couple that live in the house in front of ours are probably our closest neighbors.  All three of their daughters are married with kids- with the oldest living in the same city as them. Their son – the youngest - just married; and that sets the stage for the following events.

I’ve known my neighbors’ oldest grandchild- a seventh grader- since I can remember. We’ll call her Nia. On the occasion of their uncles wedding, she was joined by her tornado of a cousin- let’s say Gilly who is about a year younger than her.

Nia is quiet and looks shrewdly thoughtful most of the time, while Gilly is both sunshine AND dynamite in a human form. While I’ve never had many memorable encounters with Nia despite living in the same city and being neighbors with her grandma, I’ve had plenty with Gilly. In fact every time her mother comes to the city to visit her mother, we’ve played and fought and  laughed and screamed to the point that I’m now confused how in the world was I reduced to such an immature bratty child by a mere girl about 5 years younger than me.

Nonetheless this time we didn’t fight once (and I am claiming all the credit for it). If truth be told, we unconsciously acted more like middle school besties with all the gossiping and scheming. Which, by all means, is natural for her considering she is in middle school and fine by me as I enjoyed her company.

Gilly’s family stayed in the city for about 15 days. And between the wedding responsibilities the 11 year old had taken upon herself, she often came to spend time with me. It didn’t take me long to realize the girl loved to gossip- specially about certain topics such as dating and boys that she, I’m assuming, must have recently been exposed to in her big city and relatively more straightforward society.

She would tell me about the “boyfriend -girlfriend stuff” of her school and house and I would listen and make comments here and there. I was aware that a lot of what she said was not true but children do sometimes lie with no malicious intent behind it. What surprised me though was Gilly going-

“Nia confessed to uncle’s (the one who was getting married) friend.”

“What-”

“Yes, she had a crush on him…”

Now I didn’t doubt for a second that Nia, the wise and calm older, girl had done no such thing. But I sure was disappointed  in Gilly now for telling lies about someone she knew I  personally knew and could probably form a false opinion about  based on some meant to be entertaining falsehood. And it also hit me how Gilly was fine with stirring up gossip of her cousin with family friend about 10 years older than her.

Still I naturally forgot about it until a few days later Nia came to our house along with Gilly.

See I wasn’t trying to start some drama, I promise. But I sometimes speak without thinking even once, let alone twice. The question just casually came out of my mouth; I wasn’t even a tad bit interested in the answer.

“Who did you confess to Nia?”

“WHO DID I CONFESS TO?”

Then the room echoed the voice of a panicked Gilly who was always aware that if this conversation took place, she would be confronted and would have to explain and still nothing would cover up her little gossipy lie. She still tried though.

She had a choice to make and she made it in a way that proved to me that she cared about my opinion of her. Instead of saying that she said no such thing and making me the bluffer, she chose to convince Nia on the spot that she in fact did confess to this friend of her uncle that she liked.

Well this discussion didn’t go on for long. Nia called her out for making up such a story and tried to remove the idea of that from my head. I attempted to assure her by saying that I didn’t believe much of it either way and spent the next few hours condemning myself for being stupid enough to let it out that Gilly had said something like that to me. Gilly telling lies for the fun of it was bad, but 11 year olds don’t know better – I was aware of that well enough; I used to be eleven too.

My subconscious just kept hoping that Nia did not complain to her aunt - Gilly’s mother – about it. It would be awful and I did not want her to get in trouble.

 The possibility of Nia coming back after a while to clear things up again was not at all on my mind. But the girl was back in the evening and tried to make sure I wasn’t entertaining any idea of her liking someone so much older than her at this age or liking someone older and being weird enough to tell them about it.

As mentioned earlier, I already had not believed it to be true. Even if I did, I wasn’t going to form an opinion of her based on that, let alone a harsh one. And even if I did that too, I wouldn’t have expected her to care about what I thought of her.  Quiet and confident Nia, who –though younger than me- had always, intimidated me in some ways. Whose not starting a conversation with me most of the time had convinced me she didn’t quite care.

Nonetheless, here she was- trying to clear up her name when it wasn’t even   tarnished in the first place, from the mind of someone who frankly hadn’t given it another thought; even if they I did, it wouldn’t have affected her in any way. She cared actually, about my image of her. It was a weird thing to realize.

More so when I understood – that is how I have always reacted and continue to react without realizing it. It reminded me of the countless times I got disturbed for quite a while when I thought someone didn’t think of me a certain way. Reminded me of many times I have cared too much about someone’s opinion of me, trying to get them to like me – even at times when I knew I was most likely never seeing them again in my life. It reminded me of how I make desperate efforts to make society think of me as certain kind of person.      

And it made me feel like crying when I realized that no one cared.

Just like I didn’t. Even if I thought of someone a certain way, I didn’t quite care about it, didn’t care for them to care about it. But as I sat there looking at Nia explaining and denying a gossip about herself to me – the same Nia I thought more highly of than she’d ever know- I felt sad. Sad for the part of us that goes around looking for everyone else’s approval and ensuring they didn’t think lowly of us. I felt sad as I realized society doesn’t care about its own thoughts of us even half as much as we do. I felt sad when it hit me everyone probably thinks better of us than we think they do.

Most of all- I felt sad to know that most of those people’s opinion of me wouldn’t have affected my life either way if I could just bring myself to not care.

[imnotusedtobeingloved]

EQUALLY LUCKY

(PLEASE DON’T REBLOG!)

Warnings: Internal conflict / Mental struggles.

Pairing: Azula x f!Reader

Characters: Azula, Zuko, Izumi.

Requested: Yes!

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters, nor the gif. Credit to the owners.

Summary: You get a glimpse into Azula’s life years after Sozin’s Comet, with you by her side.

A/N: This was my first time making an x reader with Azula, so i’m very nervous to post this lol. It got way more angsty than i intended it to be, but i also wanted to try and stay true to Zula’s character to some extent. And i very much hope i did. Thank you for the great request @the-desert-shewolf​ i hope this is what you were looking for.

“Zuzu, you don’t look so good!”

The last Agni Kai. It was a day that was forever branded into your mind. You could still remember the heat of her flames. How her patient, strategic mind slipped into a rash and impulsive demeanor. She’d fataly wounded her own brother. Ready to do the same to Katara, if she hadn’t stopped her. And that was when you’d found her. Chained to a grid on the floor like an animal, crying in despair and spitting fire like a dragon. Nobody dared to go near her for hours. Nobody but you. “You need to stop, Azula,” You’d cried tears of your own as you forcefully hugged her, body winding against yours. Still trying to free herself. Still trying to fight. Still trying to win. “Please... I’m begging you...” Her whimper broke your heart. You were all that she had left.

There were times when not even a heartfelt “I love you,” could save her. Instead it was interpreted as a further manipulation through her mother. The so called ‘Puppetmaster’. She felt so far out of reach.

But not all days were bad. Sometimes Azula remembered. In the bright hours she recalled your supportive actions and words. You always hoped they would give her some kind of strength. And it wasn’t any easier to face those hardships yourself. To love someone who was hurt so very deeply.

“Being damaged doesn’t give you the right to abuse others,”

A lot of people called her crazy. Called you crazy for feeling affection towards the princess. But what were you supposed to do? You couldn’t just ignore them. Or turn them off. It wasn’t possible. It wasn’t what you wanted. All you were trying to do was to care for a person you’d known since you were a kid. A childhood friend, teenage crush and an adult lover. Where Zuko had been saved by Iroh, Azula had been saved by you. But it wasn’t quite the same. You'd just been a little kid yourself at the time.

“Are you going to see Azula?” You nodded, smiling at Zuko over your shoulder. The robes of the Fire Lord really suited him. “I am. I want to surprise her with a picnic,” He raised a brow, curiously leaning over the little basket on the table before you. You’d spent hours picking out different kinds of tarts and snacks, trying not to get in the way of the cooks.

It was a perfect summer day. The climate was warm and mild. Your timing couldn’t have been better.

Years had passed since Sozin’s Comet occured. Years full of anxiety and anger. But finally you’d arrived in a part of your life, where things were looking up again. The time spend supporting Zuko as the Fire Lord hadn’t been wasted. Both of you worked together on a daily basis. Especially when it came to his sister. Despite everything she had done, he couldn’t deny that he held a soft spot for her. So it was no wonder that she resided in one of the finest suites of the palace. After being monitored and treated for ages, her mental heatlh finally regained stability.

“She’s lucky to have you, (Y/N),” He said, attempting to steal one of the tarts only to earn a slap on the hand. Grumbling he retreated, watching as you checked the contents again, before closing the lid. “Maybe,” You turned around to face your friend. “But i’d like to think we’re equally lucky,”

Your picnic was set up in the gardens, by the fountain, under the old apple tree.

Her whole life Azula only gained approval from two people. Her father and you. The few moments of empathy she experienced were supported by you. If she had a nightmare late at night, you’d crawl into bed with her. When you reduced the choice between you two to physical affection, Ozai couldn’t keep up with you. The mixed messages her parents gave her as a child were what lead her into misery. But her best friend, someone of the same age, stuck by her.

Eventually you’d won her over. Relationships were rekindled. Needs were met.

And right this moment, you were beyond glad that you had. “There you are, sugarplum,” An involuntary grin spread on your face. You’d been so busy with displaying everything perfectly that you hadn’t heard her come up behind you. “I see you haven’t grown tired of the petnames,” That nickname would truly stick with you for life. She’d once used it mockingly, back when you visited Ember Island. And she did ever since. It was always used with an edge of sarcasm, but never empty of love.

“You wouldn’t have it any other way, would you (Y/N)?” You turned around to her, reaching for one of her hands. Her fingers intwined themselves with yours. “Of course not, Azula,” Pulling her towards your little arrangement, you sat down on the blanket, leaning against the strong stem of the tree and patting the spot beside you.

Since her recovery she’d formed a habit of over-sharing her feelings and often apologizing more than nessecary. Those were new sides that you had to grow accustomed to, but that weren’t unwelcome. Nevertheless you were relieved that she also kept some of her wit. She knew she could be free with you. Didn’t need to fear any jugdement. Some days were harder than others. On those Azula would cry a lot. And so would you. You couldn’t stand seeing her so broken.

“Keep it together, (Y/N),” She would say at first, making you laugh through your tears. “It’s okay,” You’d reassure her time and time again. “Healing takes time,”

It was hard to face all those bottled up emotions after such an amout of time. It wasn’t her favorite way to deal with things at first, but she quickly found it helped. And it didn’t take long for her to tell you.

“Sharing your tears doesn’t make you weak,” She’d repeat your words in her darkest times. It brought her comfort. Kept her from going back to her old ways.

The princess moved to sit in the spot next to you, but she never made it that far. Small feet rushed through the grass, running straight into her legs. A tiny, little person curled around them, hugging her as far as she could reach. “Zula!” They squeaked.

The so-called ‘Zula’ raised a brow and crossed her arms, looking down at the little troublemaker. “What do you think you’re doing here?” The girl only lifted her hands in response. You stiffled a smile as Azula picked her up. “Where is your father? Didn’t he want to spend time with you?” Yes he did. And he arrived right on time. “Izumi?” Zuko looked around, searching for her, until he spotted you. The princess was snuggling into her aunt’s chest, a place that always felt warm. You knew it best. “There you are!” His sister raised a brow, tapping her foot on the ground, when he walked up to the three of you. When they stood next to each other, the family-resemblance was undeniable. They shared the same shade of amber eyes, the soft umber strands, and the fair, spotless skin.

It was another person that had helped Azula on her journey. Izumi.

The girl got to experience the childhood the siblings never had. She was proof that princesses didn’t have to be perfect all the time. Nobody did. And she loved her aunt without any doubt or fear.

“You really need to keep better watch on her, Zuzu. This is already the fifth time this has happened,” The Fire Lord nodded, holding his hands out. “Of course. It won’t happen again, i promise,” Azula tried handing her niece over, who whined, clinging to her neck. “But i mean, now that we’re already here, we could also just join you on your picnic,” He argued, pointing to his daughter who held onto Azula’s clothes with all her might. “Izumi seems to like the idea,” You squinted your eyes at him. This was definetely not a coincedence. Accidents don’t repeat themselves that often. “Admit it, Zuko. You’ve purposefully told Izumi that her aunt is here, only so you could get your clutches on our food again!” You’d connected the dots and read the situation. He’d taken a glimpse into your basket every time before you went out the past times. Particular interest always occured when it contained those delicous fruit tarts. With rose pedals on top. He gasped. “No, i didn’t!” 

“He’s lying,” Azula said, rolling her eyes. Izumi proceeded to tell her father that “Lying is bad!” which earned her a gentle pat on the head from her aunt.

Nevertheless they swayed you to share some of the ‘goodies’ as Izumi liked to call them. Finally you had Azula were she belonged. Next to you. Her niece sat in her lap, munching happily as your lover ran her hand through her hair. It had taken some time until she’d been allowed to see Izumi at first. Zuko and her mother hadn’t let them meet each other until his sister was completely stabile. Additionally he didn’t want to put Azula through something she couldn’t handle at the time. Their first meeting had been nervewracking for everyone who watched, but an eye-opening event for the two princesses. They seemed comfortable. Content with each other. Sometimes Azula would act as if Izumi bothered her. But she couldn’t deny that she was fond of the girl.

It was also no secret that Azula was clearly the ‘coolest aunt’. At least from Izumi’s perspective. She looked up to her as the strongest female firebender, to be known. Of course she was still too young to fight. But that didn’t stop her from constantly begging the siblings for stories. “Can you tell me a story?” She’d ask, making a pout. “I’ve told you stories countless times,” Her aunt replied, booping her upturned nose. “Another one, pleeease?” Azula sighed. Zuko chimed in, coming to her aid. He started telling the tale of the ‘Dance of Dragons’ in great detail, paying no mind to his sisters sarcastic comments interrupting the tale. Izumi was exstatic about both of them engaging in the narrative. When the story was completed, he beamed at Azula. “Remember when mother used to take us to watch the Ember Island Players perform this play? Afterwards you and i would reenact every scene. I don’t get why i always had to be the dark water spirit, tough,” His sister scoffed, not hiding her gleefull smirk. “Clearly, i made a better dragon emperor,” Her niece laughed at their antics, clapping her little hands. You could comprehend her joy. It was hilarious to have them both participate.

Unfortunatly, Izumi couldn’t escape her duties forever. “Bye, auntie Zula! Bye auntie (Y/N)!” She waved when Zuko carried her back inside. Upon her loopsided smile, Azula couldn’t help but grin, waving back. It wasn’t a sneer or a grimace. It was a genuine expression of so much beauty, that it took your breath away. When she turned back to face you, she furrowed her brows. “Why are you looking at me like that?” There were a ton of reasons. You didn’t even know were to start. So your delight had to be expressed differently. Her lips weren’t far from yours. It took a mere second to connect them. They were soft, as always. She tasted sweet, like the pastries she’d eaten before. “You’re my everything,” you mumbled, her lips still brushing yours. You see her eyes watering as she struggled to speak her next words. They reminded her of all that she’d endured. And yet you’re important enough for her to pull through. “I love you, (Y/N),”

A moment later the tears were replaced by a smile. Her hands came to rest on your cheeks, one of her thumbs running over your bottom lip, removing the lipstick hers had left. You yelped as she abruptly grabbed your shoulders, pulling you to rest your head in her lap.

She worked to untangle your locks, massaging your scalp in the process. Her nails lightly scraped your skin every so often. It felt relaxing. Heavenly. The smell of smoke and leather teased your senses. Something so familiar that it was like home. You allowed yourself to close your eyes for a moment, being at peace with just... feeling her. Being in her presence.

“Agni, you look just as self satisfied as my niece,” She playfully remarked.

The slight breeze made the leaves rustle softly. “Why wouldn’t i?” You chuckled, slowly opening your eyes to look up at her. Her slim fingers hadn’t stopped spoiling you. She looked stunning in the midday sun. Her eyes glowed like molten gold, framed by long, dark lashes, casting shadows on her cheeks. “I’m being pampered by the princess herself. I consider myself to be very lucky,” Her lips pulled into a smile as she caught your gaze.

“You’re right, (Y/N). We are lucky,”

Because everything you did for her, she would return tenfold.

Despite all the hardships, neglect and abuse she’d suffered, Azula had managed to get out on the other side.

Stronger, and better than ever.

Reconnected to the world around her, she remained one of the most powerful fire benders. Her blue flames offering protection wherever you’d go.

When she’d first felt affection towards you, she thought you were her weakness.

Now she knew you were her strength.

[dahlia-coccinea]

What’s your opinion on the main characters in WH (like one for Nelly, one for Catherine etc)? Do you have a favourite and a least favourite?

There are a lot of main characters...I guess Nelly Dean, Heathcliff, Catherine Earnshaw, Cathy Linton, Hareton Earnshaw, and Linton Heathcliff? I feel bad cutting out Edgar and Isabella, they are important characters but I could easily write a thesis on each character and I don’t want to make this unbearably long (you’re going to regret asking me this as it is lol).

Nelly - She is not the “sensible soul” that she esteems herself to be. Compared to other characters she may seem discerning, but that’s partially because she’s just a witness to events that more deeply affect other characters. She can be very biased towards and against certain people, and her opinions tend to be fairly rigid. Her actions and convictions seem more an unconscious exhibition of societal norms of the time and her station in life; rather than her objective rational thinking. She certainly isn't immune to common superstition and small-mindedness. That being said, she is not the villain of the novel as critic James Hafley argued. She certainly isn’t heartless and cruel and she is motivated to do what she believes is the right thing to do. Overall I like her character.

Heathcliff - It's a testament to the complexity of his character that there is such a wide range of narratives on him…some I admittedly don’t understand. While a powerful force in the novel, I think he shows himself to be very human and fallible, and not the “ghoul” or “vampire” he is sometimes accused of being. It makes me laugh how many times I’ve seen critics say he is the human embodiment of the Heights but the first meeting of him it's literally said that he is a “singular contrast to his abode”? It’s also strange that his physical nature is often questioned by critics that reduce him to an elemental symbol, yet I would think Catherine is a better candidate to say she is more symbolic since we first encounter her in a dream and she is merely a memory/ghost in half the novel. Not to mention that throughout her life she displays a fixation on the spiritual and divine (not that I think she is symbolic either). I think he’s meant to be read as a human, not a devil or a symbol, and it makes it more interesting to read him as such. He can be sarcastic and witty and also utterly devoid of humor. His pain and loss is tragic yet his anger and hatred is fearsome. He plans to enact revenge over decades and (kind of) succeeds yet he also is so short-sighted and often misjudges characters and situations. He’s a villain and a victim and never plays either part in exactly the way you’d expect. Despite all this, he never feels inconsistent or out of character. 

Catherine - I’m such a broken record on her lol. We get a lot of negative opinions about her from Nelly but everyone else loves her? So I think it’s worth questioning what Nelly says about her. I don’t agree with popular narratives that exaggerate how terrible she is. She is certainly proud, quick-tempered, and her strong, unrelenting nature is unique for any character and even more so for a woman. These traits also make her Heathcliff’s natural counterpart, although she is never cruel in the way he can be, and she doesn’t seem to enjoy that side of his character either. I think audiences/readers often forget the better parts of her character, such as her love for her father regardless of his constant admonishments, her love of Heathcliff despite his harshness and his wrongdoings, and her brother Hindley in spite of all his cruelty. The tragedies of the novel are not her fault as it has sometimes been suggested. 

Hareton - It is interesting his character probably has the most physical descriptions and I’d say is the most flatteringly portrayed male character. Yes, he starts off being described as brutish by Lockwood, but we later get many moments showing he also has a gentleness. His faults are normally immediately shown as not wholly his doing and I’d say he has the most character growth, even more than Cathy. Cathy’s appearance gets a lot of mentions too, but because Lockwood is kind of a romantic and in a faraway, lonely place, it makes sense that he projects a lot of romantic notions on her. We don’t need to know that Hareton is good-looking but it’s certainly made known lol. I think it’s in part because Cathy’s and Hareton’s good nature are meant to be shown as desirable and Nelly certainly makes an aesthetic connection there in her descriptions of them. I really like his character, and how despite everything, and his initial pride, he tries repeatedly to help Cathy, even though it does nothing in gaining her good opinion and only puts him at odds with Heathcliff, who he sees as a father. He also shows that you don’t have to be the product of your upbringing.

Cathy - I really like how she tries to do the right thing and is good, yet doesn’t allow anyone (even Heathcliff) control her. She has faults but she’s able to grow from them. She also has a lot of similarities to her mother. For both Cathy and Hareton, I really dislike the idea that their move to Thrushcross is the symbolic win of culture over nature. That’s never made any sense to me and makes even less sense when you consider that Emily preferred nature, and the freedom and spirituality she found there, and not riches and formality. And after all, Cathy and Hareton are the successors of Catherine and Heathcliff. I can’t imagine they will become supremely refined, cultured, and gentle. Everyone forgets they are both wild and proud, and at their worst, they both physically hit the other - Cathy cuts Hareton with her whip, and years later Hareton hits her. This notion of their new domesticity comes from the narrative of the Heights = wildness and Thrushcross = respectability and progress, and I’ve mentioned before this also distorts our image of Isabella and mislabels her as a weak, refined, gentlewoman, even though she shows herself to be highly spirited. Sorry, got a little off-topic at the end there. I think they can forgive and learn to be kind to each other without equating it to them becoming genteel and upper-class. I don’t like that critics do this. 

Linton - I get why he’s no one’s favorite character but I don’t hate him. He is tragic, despite the fact that he also very annoying and bratty lol. I understand why he doesn’t care to better himself, and it seems pretty clear his behavior is a cry for the safety and affection that has been missing in his life since his mother died. He’s a pawn in a game he doesn’t understand, and yet he’s very aware of his role as a pawn and that his life will be short and its meaning and worth are ascribed inasmuch as he can prove useful. It’s understandable that he would cling to Cathy and her kindness to him. Of course, some of his sufferings are his own making. It seems he could less lonely if he was perhaps a little kinder to Hareton who doesn’t seem to have a preconceived dislike of him but is pushed away by Linton’s snobbishness. 

Favorite: That's a really difficult question. The simple answer is I love them all hah! It does change, but I do often go back to Catherine Earnshaw. Charlotte Bronte wrote that there is a “certain strange beauty in her fierceness” and I think that sums it up perfectly. The fact she dies tragically young and the closest we get to her as a narrator is the little bit of her diary Lockwood reads, and that her memory lives on so strongly with Edgar and Heathcliff, all make her a compelling figure. The fact that so many readers hate her also makes me like her more lol. 

Least favorite: Everyone always says Linton and Joseph are the worst so I’ll say Zillah because she doesn’t get picked on enough lol. She literally didn’t realize Nelly was being held hostage and instead believes some bullshit story about her being lost in a marsh and assumes Heathcliff saved her?? She was terrible to Cathy - granted she had been proud and stiff-necked but she was clearly being held against her will? Like is Zillah just not at all aware of her surroundings? She doesn’t get Dr. Kenneth when Linton is dying and instead leaves Cathy alone crying in the stairway, supposedly out of fear of losing her job if she disobeys - yet she didn’t seem worried about that when she puts Lockwood in Catherine’s old bedroom? She also knowingly embarrasses Hareton when he shyly asks her to ask Cathy to read aloud for him - she immediately says that Hareton is the one asking for it. Zillah is just one of those people that has no self-awareness and no consideration for others beyond her self-preservation. So yeah she wins the spot of “least favorite” lol. I’m not sure if you meant my least favorite of the main characters? If so then it would have to be Linton just cause no amount of sympathetic feelings towards him makes him less annoying lol sorry. 

[musicallisto]

Hello love,

Congratulations for the 800 followers! You absolutely deserve this and so much more! I'm happy to see how your blog grows and that you're still providing all of us with wonderful content. You're one of the first blogs that I've started to follow here on Tumblr and I'm so lucky to have found your blog ♡

As for your celebration event, could I please request a 🍨 vanilla milkshake with a male Peaky Blinders Character?

I'm more on the curvy side (and insecure about it) and I'm ALWAYS wearing black (which I love, no matter what others say or even more if they object). As for my personality, I'm a highly complex, paradox and complicated individium. I'm unbelievable patient, timid, awkward, kind, forgiving, open-minded, compassionate, thruthful, gentle and calm and I've been told that I have a calming effect on others, that I can easily ground anyone and anything, no matter how troubled their mind is. I prefer vintage over modern things. I think rather deep which often leads me to overthinking everything, which in turn leads me to doubting (very much) myself. You would be surprised how timid and reserved I am, I'm sure you wouln't notice me in a room full of people if it wouldn't be for my different appearance (but I like it this way). I'm always well-meaning, yet often misunderstood (maybe because it's hard for me to articulate myself). I can be incredible lazy, clumsy and forgetful. I've always felt like I don't really belong anywhere, so I've started to distance myself from others a while ago. I'm a outsider, weird, a dork, not normal, a loner and I fucking love it, because I like to be different, I would hate to fit into just one box and to be like everyone else. And I like people who are not ashamed to be their 100% true self, no matter how different that is from the mainstream. I'm the most loyal person you'll ever find, once you earn my trust, I'll always be on/by your side, no matter what. That says a lot, because I'm hard to scare away. Sometimes I feel alienated from the people and things surrounding me and I'm sure that I annoy and bore them. I'm very nervous and insecure around others, which is why I try to avoid people and why I'm not talking all that much around them (though, I'm a really good listener). I'm easily overwhelmed by large crowds and much light/noise, that's why I don't like to go outside, I prefer to cozy up at home. I would never intentionally hurt a animal and I'm not eating any meat, which is very important to me. I believe that there isn't a ounce of cruelty inside me. I'm unassuming and understanding, I only believe what I've witnessed on my own and I have endless acceptance for almost everything. Due to my Insomnia, I'm a night owl. I have strong personal values, am very opinionated and I'm really in-touch with myself and even though I'm extremly insecure, I would never reduce or change myself and views/opinions for someone and I neither have a problem to challenge authority and advocating for my beliefs. I'm a perfectionist and sometimes I really hate it. And, as you can see, I'm unable to be brief. My favourite colours are dark green, black, gold and dark purple. My greatest passion is music, even if I can't sing or play an instrument.(I prefer rock/punk/pop/80s/90s) It's the most calming and therapeutic thing when it comes to my anxiety and depression and I could never live a day without it. You will never see me in the street without headphones in my ears and even when I'm at home there's music playing almost all the time. I could talk for hours about music and what it means to me. And otherwise I love to watch films and series (I like fantasy, horror, psychological thriller, science fiction and psychological drama and almost anything from the 70s, 80s and 90s). I love rainy days and to go outside while it's pouring big, fat drops. What I love the most is to drive around without a destination, while talking and listening to music. And I love to spend time with my cat, if I could, I would have endless animals who live peacefully and loved with me. I enjoy to have deep talks and to be challenged to think. I love to take late-night-strolls, while gazing into the sky and watching the stars/moon. I have a fascination for dark and macabre things.

I really hope that's not too much? But thank you anyway ♡

Have a good day!

thank you so much for your kind words, you have no idea how much it means to me to know that I was one of the first blogs you followed ;; here’s your vanilla milkshake - and it’s also my first time writing for peaky blinders, but I hope it’s alright; and I hope finn shelby will find the portrait I paint of him accurate enough...

Birmingham was a drab and disheartening place enough without the war adding to its joylessness; but somehow the streets are even worse to bear deserted than when they’re bustling and fetid. Especially for a ten year old boy who wants nothing but to play with someone, to talk to someone, to see someone.

With his brothers off fighting somewhere in France and his aunt too busy with her businesses (adult stuff that Finn has absolutey no interest in attempting to understand), the youngest Shelby has been fighting off an affliction worse than consumption and measles, because much more insidious for a boy his age; boredom

and he’s so sad, so irrevocably sad, with no one to bruise his knees with and throw mud at, that he just aimlessly wanders the empty streets whenever aunt Polly isn’t looking, to find a semblance of stimulation

(he used to enjoy the solitude, it gave him time to imagine delirious stories in fantastical worlds and read the most enthralling of novels, but not anymore. four years of reclusion is an awfully long time for a little boy.)

and it’s during one of his escapades that he first meets you

you’re a little girl his age, dressed in a pretty dress, wearing pretty booties and holding a pretty little woven basket, but your face is stuck on the most grouchy frown he’s ever seen on a little girl, and you don’t walk, you stomp down the wet pavement like a wrathful titan

And it’s probably the first time in four years that he’s been this close to making a new friend, so he walks up to you, despite how rusty his communication skills have become

“Girls don’t frown. It’s unbecoming.”

(Yes, pretty rusty indeed; but in his defense, he’s ten, he’s bored, he’s lonely, and he’s only ever heard Ada say it, and Ada is the most level-headed of his siblings, so anything she says must be true, right?)

“Shut up.”

(Well, if it was unbecoming of you to frown, it’s even more to rebuff someone so rudely. You don’t even spare a glance and continue walking; he has to hurry to catch up to you.)

“You can’t say that. It’s a bad word.”

“How do you know that?”

“My family says it all the time, but they told me I can’t say it.”

“Well, my family is not your family. And I hate my family!”

You’ve yelled the last words at the sky, so loud that the crows on the neighboring roofs have taken off in a startled flight.

“They want to wear this stupid dress to go to the stupid market to buy stupid meat. I don’t even want to eat meat, that’s cruel! And I don’t even want to wear a frilly dress! I want to wear black!”

And in saying so you tugged at the pink and white ribbons that encircled your waist.

And Finn couldn’t help being extremely intrigued at this little girl who said bad words and refused to eat meet and wanted to wear black. It was the most exciting thing to ever happen in all the duration of the war.

“You want to wear a black dress?”

“Yes, but my mama won’t let me. She says it’s too sad because of the war. But black isn’t sad! Black is beautiful!”

“Maybe I could find you a black dress. I’m sure my sister must have one. Where do you live?”

And, loyal to his promise, the following morning he had run to your doorstep and snuck into your house - a proper Shelby talent, to be able to go unnoticed or make a ruckus depending on the occasion - with an old, crinkled mourning dress of Ada’s, that had probably belonged to his mother and had been mended several times

And it was obviously five sizes too big for you and you looked more like a ghost from one of Finn’s horror novels, your arms floating in the sleeves and the hem of the skirt pooling at your feet, but your smile was the brightest light he’d ever seen in this whole damn town.

“Do you like it?”

(He didn’t really know why he sounds so nervous. Maybe it was having a friend, a real friend, and doing something personal for them... or maybe it had to do with how fast his heart beat, watching you in that gigantic, shapeless dress)

“I love it! Thank you so much, Finn!”

From then on started one of the most wonderful friendships Finn would ever have, and what would bring a ray of light to the grim existence of a little boy in the midst of a global war

Despite the ration cards, despite the loneliness, despite the worry that tugged at his stoic aunt’s eyes for her son and nephews across the Channel... he found an unspeakable solace in your friendship

And one day, without a trace, you were gone

He knocked on your door; gone. He asked all the neighbors what had happened to the family that lived there; gone. He wrote you letters and sent them to the confines of England; gone. He got scolded by Polly for marking numbers at random on Tommy’s state-of-the-art telephone; gone.

Suddenly he was back to the bleak existence he had battled with before meeting you, and the hollow inside his chest only grew wider as the days went on, because he had no explanation as to what had happened to you, and worried every single day

Thankfully, the war ended not long after, and his brothers came back home, all alive and unscathed - well, for the most part

Fast forward more or less ten years, and much has changed in Finn Shelby’s life and in old Birmingham, but the memory of you still stugs at his heartstrings

One evening, he’s tasked by Arthur to run some errands, send a few messages, scout a few places; the most dangerous thing his older brothers will ever let him do

His task leads him to a bar in the center of town, one that pours its joyous light and music into the street outside; he’s there to meet with a client, arrange a meeting; nothing he’s hasn’t done already

But the evening takes a turn for the unexpected when he recognizes the girl sat alone at a table, enjoying the musicians’ jazz with an air of pure bliss on her face

It’s been ten years, of course, but... it’s unmistakable. That face, that silhouette, and the black ensemble from head to toe... and he’s always had a knack for remembering faces, especially those that mark him deeply

Suddenly he’s frozen on the spot, and he has forgotten why he came to the bar in the first place, what his target looks like - all he knows is you, and how beautiful you look in the dim light of the bar, and the undisclosed and unknown feelings he had for you at the time come flooding back.

Except this time, he understands, and he fears them, because he doesn’t have time for any of this, and it’s way too dangerous for you and him

But he can’t just pass you by and not say a word?

He swallows, hard.

And walks up to you.

“Y/N?”

You open your eyes, and your face flashes with recognition, and a little bit of pain as well. Even if you fled without a word, and left him hanging all these years, he’s incapable of rancor

“Finn... wow, you’ve changed so much.”

“You haven’t.”

He gestures at your face, your clothes, how you savor the music like the finest drink in the world, and you laugh and blush, sending his heart into overdrive

“Where were you all this time?”

“I’m so sorry, Finn... my brother died in the war, and... my mom sent me to live with my grandparents in Scotland. We were all destroyed by grief... I needed to get away.”

“Without explanation? Not even a word?”

“I wanted to write to you, so bad, but... I couldn’t remember your address. I couldn’t remember anything about Birmingham at all...”

He nods, slowly, in understanding.

The war opens wounds that never heal, even after all the most beautiful friendships and love stories in the world.

“But I’m really glad I found you.”

His heart is pounding in his throat. Maybe it’s a sign of destiny that he found you here, tonight, alone, and ready to welcome him back. Maybe it’s a word from fate, that you can never truly be apart.

So he takes the seat in front of you, and you smile, that shy but bright smile of yours, and he forgets all about his mission, his client, and his brothers.

They’ll have to understand.

800 follower sleepover

[holycow99]

石田お寿司 29/7/21 stream translation Part 1

T/n: This is not the full translation of the stream. I only translated the parts I could understand & interpret or parts I found interesting/important. I’m still a beginner in Japanese, so the translations may not be accurate. If you want to repost, please repost at your own risk. I’ve changed the format as this format seems better. I’ll be writing in this format from now on.

*Someone asked him about his throat.

I: My throat? It’s normal. (t/n: He had a sore throat a few weeks ago)

I: I was asleep when chp 5 was released. It was already dark when I woke up.

*People in the comment praised chp 5.

I: Thank you, thank you. I’m glad you liked it.

C: I’m waiting for the translation!

I: It coming soon. (t/n: He’s speaking in eng.) It sounds like a wrong eng.

C: Are you right handed?

I: Yes, I am.

I: For chapter 6, I’ll probably finish drawing it if I work until the day after tomorrow, even though I haven’t made any progress at all. After that, I’ll add in the typesetting and then it’ll probably finished around 2nd or 3rd August. I’d be bad if I couldn’t get it done after I’ve said this.

C: Fumi (Jack Jeanne’s character) plays erhu? (t/n: OP’s referring to JJ OST album’s illustration.)

I: Yeah. Kosemura Akira (composer for Jack Jeanne) wanted to use erhu when composing Fumi’s theme song. So, he asked a famous person to play it. It’s really rare to have erhu in songs. Not many people in Japan play it. Why did he choose erhu? Then, when imagining what kind of instruments suit each character, for Kai, he has that deep, bass feeling. So, his instrument is double bass. Piano is Kisa. Suzu is, of course, all about hitting the beat. Drum is an important instrument in rhythm creation. For yonaga, it’s a wind instrument. I want him to play a pipe. You won’t understand even if I talk about it. Should I leave the picture here? Wait a min, let me show you.

*Someone commented about Tokyo revengers’ illustration.

I: Oh yes, I did an illustration of Tokyo Revengers’ Mikey. I want to draw Draken as well.

*He showed the illustration of JJ’s characters with instruments.

I: I drew Shirota playing guitar. For some reason, I imagined he could play guitar. And then, instruments like viola (referring to Neji). Otori plays maracas.

I: That’s how it is. And then, we have the Sui exhibition in Nagoya. I’ve been writing report on the event. Isn’t it amazing? Probably not. It’s for myself after all. Rather than for myself, I’d get mixed up if the exhibition is held in a lot of places. 

*He started Playing Ghosts n’ Goblins.

C: I really want to play Ghosts n’ Goblins, but it seems so stressful.

I: It’s not stressful, rather you’d feel angry.

*Giant monsters appeared.

I: Just now on discord, Goubaru texted me saying he wanted to call me, but I rejected. He’s expressing his anger right now. (t/n: He referred the monsters stomping the ground as angry Goubaru.)

C: Sensei, there’s no love counselling session today?

I: It seems like some of you were happy when I gave love advice. There’s someone who became a couple with her childhood friend. She said she’s gonna talk to her bf once again. What was the problem again? Something like she had trouble chatting with her bf through mail. I advised her not to then. Hahaha.

C: Do you remember people who always watch your livestream?

I: Not at all. I do remember you *****-san. (t/n: He mentioned OP’s name)

I: I tried listening to my own stream while working. When I listened to it, I realised I have a tendency to pick comments from specific people. There’re people who know to comment at the right timing, like Y****. (t/n: He mentioned the fan he always chats with) It seems like I pick them based on the colour (?), name length, and comments that are easy to pick. Weirdly enough, I always end up reading the comments from the same people.

*He’s fighting another angry and aggressive Goubaru.

C: Is Goubaru usually like this?

I: I wonder… I think so. But, he often wore this kind of down jacket, like for a year. A purple one. Even though the fabric wasn’t that thick, wearing a down jacket must be hot, right? He didn’t take it off when he’s in the workplace. He even wore it during summer. I asked him why, and he said it’s because he wanted to hide his body line. Sounds like a problem an attractive woman would’ve. I do kinda understand that. It’s probably the same reason as women who wears loose clothing as to not have their chest shown too much. He always wore purple down jackets due to reasons like that.

C: My dad also always wears down jackets in every season to hide his body line.

I: I’d tell those kind of people to lose weight.

C: Wearing down jacket and sweating is probably their way of losing weight.

I: No, but even if you sweat, you won’t lose weight. Those who’re dieting probably know this already, but sweating only reduce the water percentage in your body. Just because you sweat a lot doesn’t mean you’d lose weight. In the end, it all depends on the amount of fat you lose and the amount of muscle mass you gain.

I: With sauna, I don’t think you can lose weight. If you drink water, you gain back the amount of water you lost. However, if you don’t drink water for 2 days, you’d probably lose 2-3kg. Human bodies are made up of 70% of water after all.

C: Sauna only makes you feel refreshing.

I: Sauna makes you feel good. I think that, in itself, is nice too. It’s just that only fat people think that they can lose weight wearing down jacket. 

(t/n: I might’ve translated it a bit harsh, but I don’t think he meant it in a bad way. Please don’t be offended.)

C: Did you tell that to him?

I: I told him a lot of things. Something like “you’re gonna die” or “you’re gonna have your limbs amputated”. I have a younger friend who’s slightly diabetic, I think. He had always been fat, though he sometimes went on diet. His family knew a lot of people in the medical field, so they kept telling him to go to hospital. When he did the examination, he was told that he had a chance of getting diabetes. But Goubaru is a slob, so he wouldn’t visit hospital by his own volition, though I’m not qualified to say that since I also don’t really visit hospitals. He might be in a worse condition since he wouldn’t get checked up, so I think it’s best for him to lose weight.

I: Why being fat is not good for your health is because when the fat dissolves in your blood, the blood vessels will get clogged. That’s why I think it’s not good.

C: How much is your body fat percentage (BFP)?

I: How much is it…I’m not aiming to be ridiculously skinny or whatever. The average would be around 16-17%? It’d be great if I can get there. When I was on a rigorous diet, my BFP was as low as 13%. Some people are able to get to 10%. I wonder how they do that?

I: I’ve heard from someone about Goubaru’s body fat percentage. I’ve been talking about him, but his BFP is scary. It seems like he has 45% of fat in his body. He is nothing but a lump of fats already. The mother in Atashinchi (a classic manga) is also the same. Do you guys know Atashinchi? The mother is kinda fat. She’s also has around 45% BFP I think.

C: How much does Goubaru weigh?

I: I think he already surpassed 100kg, but I don’t know about now.

C: To be able to surpass 100kg is a talent.

I: Right. I’ve heard about that in Bananaman’s (Japanese comedy duo) radio or something. Mr. Himura (a member of Bananaman) was around 90kg at that time, though I don’t know his weight now. It’s probably around 10 years ago. He said he’s weighed more than 100kg, and that weighing 105 kg is a talent. 100kg was like the threshold for your body and you surpassed that limit.

C: There’s someone like Goubaru in my class.

I: But you don’t know him. Do you mean him having the same weight?

C: My classmate who weighs over 100kg broke the school chair just by sitting on it.

I: The weight is one thing, but even though chairs could withstand heavy amount of load, they’re not durable. Goubaru’s chair made a few scary noises whenever he sat down. It sounded similar to the sound effect of the door being opened in Inagawa Junji’s (an actor & ghost storyteller) ghost stories. I thought Mr. Junji was there.

Part 2