#yes i did say justin beaver | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

etlunainmorte · 4 years

Text

Devil May Cry playing Animal Crossing: New Horizons Headcanons

I'm back once more with another DMC playing ACNH headcanons based on my chat fic, 💙 Chat Buddies 💙!

This is, once again, dedicated to the one who started this trend of headcanons. If it weren't for you, I wouldn't have thought of ever writing this. So, thank you so much to my friend, @beyond-the-mirror . And also, belated happy birthday, dearie! I hope you like this.💙💙💙

Also tagging the lovely @evilwvergil . I hope you like the little Vergil screenshots and I hope these make you smile. Also, @dreaming-gamer may find this funny and entertaining, hehe.💙💙💙

Part 2: Vergil

*How he found out about the game: Vergil could never understand kids these days. And his son, Nero, is not an exception. One day, just like Dante, he saw his son playing ACNH on his Switch, and at first he didn't mind it. But, then, when he got back home and saw (Y/N) playing the same game on her Switch and having so much fun with it, he came up with a small idea. Vergil is not very vocal about this but, he really wanted to be close to his son after being separated from him for so long. He wanted to understand him. He wanted to bond with him and be accepted as his family. And he is willing to play this foolish game with him so he could have a bridge towards Nero's heart. He'll do whatever it takes to win his son's heart and trust. He told (Y/N) about his little plan, and she agreed to help him.

*How he got the game: Acquiring money for a new gaming console is not a hard task for Vergil. After a few Devil Hunting commissions, he and (Y/N) were able to buy a Switch for Vergil, and the first game he installed? ACNH, of course ( although that sounds hilarious coming from the man of motivation, himself ). (Y/N) helped him plant fruit trees and flowers by visiting his humble island he simply named, Infinity ( based on one of William Blake's poems ).

*He never time travelled ( insert coughing Dante noises here ) despite knowing it would make things easier for him, and strived with hours and hours of gameplay, in between his Devil Hunting missions, to reach the glorious 5 - star rating. And, as expected of the eldest son of Sparda, he was able to reach it ( insert crying Dante noises here ).

*The reason for all that hard work? He wanted his island to be perfect and in top shape when he finally ask his son to visit. And he didn't disappoint. At first, Nero found it strange for Vergil to be indulging in such an activity but, then, he realized the ulterior motive of this. Like his father, Nero wasn't very vocal about his affections but, he truly appreciated the gesture and effort that Vergil has done. He felt so happy to bond with his father in his own little way. And so, father and son have found another way to spend time together, even if they're miles apart most of the time. They joined Bug Offs and Fishing Tourneys together, shared furniture and diys, Nero even helped Vergil set his own secret place in the island just to surprise (Y/N). (Y/N) appreciated the little gesture and found it cute and endearing, although the very obvious engagement ring that Vergil placed on the setup went way past her head, much to his and Nero's confusion of her utter denseness.

*Now, when it comes to Bug Offs and Fishing Tourneys, Vergil is very, very competitive. He worked and concentrated so hard to earn points just to get those three trophies. And his Happy Home Academy rating is no exception. He likes to flaunt all his trophies and event achievements. He even placed them in the library he spent so many days to set up to let others know that the eldest son of Sparda could never be defeated, even in a game such as ACNH. Not that Dante could best him at this, not at all ( for the record, Dante did quite good during the Bug Off and the Fishing Tourney. He was just too lazy to accumulate those points and only redeemed whatever prize he could get. Not to mention he's having a hard time getting his HHA points past the 100k mark, so, no. Dante is no match for Vergil this time ).

*Vergil is also very organized. His house is the epitome of perfection. His island is so neat and tidy and well - coordinated, using rustic items and little to no custom pathing. He also loves terraforming. There is something in terraforming that makes Vergil very excited. The thought of shaping his own island all by himself gets him going every time, and seeing his work at the end of the day gives him a feeling of satisfaction and achievement. This is good, yes, but barely anyone could disturb him when he's in what Nero calls his, God State.

*Vergil considers it as an act of benevolence when, one day, out of the blue, he insisted on visiting Dante's island and simply dropped, without a word, a complete set of furniture for his brother's pizzeria, all wrapped nicely. This included stalls with custom pizza signs ( because he knew Dante is too lazy to do one ), a neon sign post ( because he knew Dante loves these so much ), a set of diner chairs and tables, some condiments, a menu chalkboard, a hand mixer, an ice shaver ( for the strawberry sundae ), a soft serve lamp, and a hearth for the pizza. When Dante bugged Vergil and asked him why, he simply answered, "For you, scum", to which, Dante replied with, "Aww, Love ya, bro! Ur the best<3<3<3". Vergil didn't say anything else and just left.

*Vergil has no favorite villager. In fact, he can't seem to remember their names and only refer to them as, "Chicken", "Wolf", "Rat", or "Cub". He does seem to remember the name of only one villager, and that is Kyle ( only because Dante begged Vergil again and again to let go of Kyle because he's his dreamie. Vergil, of course, refused, and only said, "If you want it, then you'll have to take it." Pff,... ). Vergil doesn't even call the npcs by their real names! I.e.: Tom Nook = The Capitalist Raccoon, Isabelle = The Dog With The Missing Sock, Timmy = The Small Raccoon, Tommy = The Other Small Racoon, Mabel = Female Sonic ( don't ask ), Sable = Snob Hedgehog, Label = Fashionable Hedgehog, Blathers = Griffon, Celeste = Griffon's Sister, Flick = The Goth Chameleon, CJ = Justin Beaver ( again, don't ask ), Saharah = The Camel, Lief = The Land Hippie, Pascal = The Sea Hippie, Harvey = The Loner Hippie, Gulliver / Gullivarrr = Another Griffon, and Kicks = The Skunk.

*Vergil considers his Sushi Bar as the second best attraction of his island ( the first one being his secret date spot with (Y/N) ). Other than that, he has a café, an outdoor library, and some places that are still works in progress ( he's diligently waiting for all the latest updates like Nero ).

***

Part 3: Nero and Kyrie coming soon!

***

💙💙💙

***

#vergil #devil may cry 5 #animal crossing new horizons #devil may cry and animal crossing crossover

50 notes · View notes

rigmarolling · 5 years

Text

Five Things Abe Lincoln Did That Prove He Was A BAMF

I love Lincoln. You probably know this if you’ve listened to me talk for more than two seconds. I have a literal entire bookshelf filled with Lincoln stuff. I teared up in Great Moments With Mr. Lincoln at Disneyland. I cried so hard when I watched Lincoln (2012), that I almost started dry-heaving. I was Lincoln (sort of) for Halloween.

Is it a problem? No. It isn’t a problem, Mom. Because Lincoln was a 100% USDA-certified badass.

Don’t believe me? Here are ten things Abe did to prove he was absolutely a BAMF.

1. That time he jumped out a window to prevent a vote.

In 1840, the Illinois legislature was voting on whether or not to fund the state bank. Lincoln was a member of the Whig party, which did not require members to wear wigs, contrary to what the name suggests, but which did support saving the state bank. The opposing party, the Democrats (different political beliefs from modern-day democrats, do NOT come at me, Reddit dudebros) wanted to shut the State bank down.

It all came down to a vote...and it looked like the anti-state bank democrats were going to win. Abraham Lincoln, then a 31-year-old legislator who looked like the pioneer version of a Tim Burton character, was getting nervous.

Above: Jack Skellington, 1840.

“Shit,” he thought, probably, “We Whigs are screwed if we lose this vote. And we don’t even get to wear wigs.”

The bank-hating democrats scheduled a vote to adjourn the session, which would effectively be the nail in the state bank’s coffin. Abe was panicking. He was the de facto leader of the Whigs; he had to do something.

“Prove your mettle, boy,” he probably thought to himself in a folksy, backwoods kinda way. “Show ‘em you ain’t gonna give up.”

So Abe did what any self-respecting legislator would do when stuck between a rock and a hard place:

He jumped out the window of the legislature to stop the vote.

To be fair, Lincoln wasn’t the only one to opt for a morning act of defenestration: a bunch of the other Whigs joined in, too. The rationale was, essentially, this:

Which is peak Internet comedy, but unfortunately, it was 1840 and the Internet didn’t exist yet, so nobody appreciated the gesture and the democrats eventually wound up closing the bank, anyway.

But at least Abe showed the entire state that he appreciated Looney Tunes-esque escape tactics.

2. That time he roasted a guy during a debate with good-old self-deprecating humor.

You ever rely on self-deprecating humor to beat people to the “yes, I KNOW I am offensive” punch?

So did our 16th president, Abraham Nicole Lincoln.

(Not his real middle name.)

When Lincoln was campaigning, his biggest rival was Stephen Douglas, the Democratic contender who was nicknamed “the little giant” because he was short but a heavy hitter in politics, and also because he looks like the kind of guy that just wouldn’t shut up at parties:

Above: “Actually, I’m not racist, BUT--”

In 1858, Lincoln and Douglas held a series of seven famous political debates called, brilliantly, The Lincoln-Douglas Debates, coming to you LIVE at Rockefeller Center, with performances by the Rockettes, Anna and Elsa on Ice, AND with special guest, Seal!

These debates were THE go-to political show of the season. If you were super into who would be elected to the Illinois Senate in the mid-19th century, then holy shit, you have got to watch these two men go at each other, man, it’s like watching a tree and an angry little dog slap each other across the stage.

During the debates, Lincoln quickly became famous for his one-liners, and also because no one had ever seen a talking tree in a suit before.

In one of the debates, Douglas accused Lincoln of being two-faced. Without missing a beat, Lincoln, who had been mocked his entire life for his ungainly, scarecrow-like appearance in the same way that I just mocked him a few sentences ago, whoops...

ANYWAY.

Lincoln turned to Douglas and went, “Honestly, if I were two-faced, would I be showing you this one?”

And then the audience did this:

And then Lincoln was like:

Check. Mate.

3. That time he was so strong and such a good wrestler that nobody messed with him.

When I say “wrestler,” what do you think of?

Is it this?

Maybe this?

What about this?

Huh? What’s that you say? “What the hell is...is that Lincoln? What...what the hell is Lincoln doing in a list of wrestlers?

“Um,” I answer, “Being a wrestler.”

Because Abraham Lincoln, 6′ 4″ and all of 150-something pounds, was, in fact, an incredibly talented wrestler.

So talented, in fact, that when it came to wrestling matches, he went undefeated for most of his life.

See, Lincoln grew up in the middle of butt crack-nowhere, out in the sticks of the American frontier. Ain’t no room for sissies out on the frontier. This here’s hard-scrabble country, see, rough-livin’; you gotta spit to live; you gotta live to spit; Neosporin? I think you mean weak-ass bitch cream.

So how did rootin’ tootin’ frontier folk blow off steam? Well, when they weren’t dying of dysentery or tuberculosis or minor infections that could today be cured by steady application of Neosporin, they were wrasslin’. And when it came to the act of picking someone up and throwing them back down, nobody wrestled like 21-year-old Abraham Justine Lincoln.

(Not his real middle name.)

One look at the guy and people were like, “The hell? What’s this ancient Egyptian mummy doing in the ring?”

But the second he got going, everyone shut up. Because this guy was nuts. He was a berserker. He could defeat a guy three times his size in seconds. He could bench the Rock, probably, and not even break a sweat.

He was the nicest guy in town. But nobody--and I mean nobody--messed with Abraham Ashley Lincoln.

(Not his real middle name).

One time, Jack Armstrong, the local heavyweight champion who was the Big Bad in town and undefeated in the wrestling and “I’m a giant asshole who smashes my way through problems” arena, challenged Lincoln to a match.

“Uh oh,” everyone in the little town of New Salem, Illinois thought, “That’s it for ol’ Twig Legs Abe. He might be good, but there’s no way he can defeat Jack Armstrong. Nice knowing you, kid; it’s a shame, because you might have made a solid president.”

But Lincoln, who knew no fear and ate chains forged in the heart of a dwarven cavern for breakfast, was like, “Bring it on, bitch.”

Above: Playin’ with the boys.

Jack and Abe started sparring and Jack threw insult after insult Abe’s way. I don’t know exactly what Jack said, but it was probably the 19th century equivalent of, “You may have 2,300 Facebook friends but nobody cares about the pictures of your homemade Shake ‘N Bake chicken that you post, eggwad.”

Abe didn’t relent.

See, he was getting angry.

Really angry.

So angry, in fact, that in one fell swoop, he suddenly slammed big Jack Armstrong to the ground so hard that Armstrong passed out, cold.

Abe had won. Everyone stared at the panting, growling, 6′4″ pine tree man in reverent awe.

A fun epilogue to this story: after Jack Armstrong recovered from getting his ass handed to him by a guy who looked like an extra in a movie about the Amish, he and Abe remained steadfast buddies for the rest of their lives.

Jack just never ever insulted Abraham Jessica Lincoln again.

(Not his real middle name.)

4. The (many) times he went off into long, rambling stories during Cabinet meetings to illustrate a point.

You know how grandma and grandpa sometimes go off on tangents and you’re like, “okay, okay, get to the point.”

But grandma and grandpa don’t even respond and just keep talking about that one time in 1953 that Anne-Marie told George that no, she hadn’t gone to the corner store, why do you keep asking, George? And then I said to George, I said, George, you need to listen to Anne-Marie because she knows that the corner store is the only one in town that sells fresh-laid eggs and Butterick circle skirt patterns, but did he listen? Did he listen to me? No, he didn’t, so I went to---

You get it.

So did every single member of Lincoln’s cabinet. Because Lincoln was a consummate storyteller, for better or for worse.

(Sometimes for worse, depending on who you asked.)

Above: “One time, at band camp...”

Lincoln would interrupt important meetings about, you know, saving the Union and the soul of the country itself with anecdotes that started something like this:

Lincoln: You know, Sec. Stanton, that reminds me of a fur-trapper I knew back in Illinois--

Stanton: Great, except, Mr. President, everyone is dying--

Lincoln: Now this here fur trapper was the best fur trapper in the entire state. Not the entire country, mind you, on account of we didn’t really have a way of measuring fur-trapping skills nationwide--

Stanton: *neck turning purple* Mr. President--

Lincoln:--but definitely the best fur trapper in Illinois. Now one day, this fur trapper set out to do what he did best: shoot some raccoons, or maybe a bear, or a wolf if he was lucky, or a deer, or some moose, or a beaver, or a mongoose, or maybe a possum--

Stanton: OH MY GOD--

Lincoln:--or a cat, if times were desperate, but not a dog, never a dog, because this here fur trapper loved dogs; had six of ‘em himself, all hound dogs, loyal to a fault, see, because this here fur trapper--

Stanton: JUST STOP--

Lincoln: --this here fur trapper could be short-sighted. See, he set his sights one day on shooting the biggest bear in the mountains--and this bear, why, this here bear was a Goliath of a bear, the biggest bear anyone ever did see, the biggest bear in the state; not the biggest bear in the country, mind you, on account of we didn’t have a way of comparing bear sizes nationwide, but--

You get the gist.

Above: “So I’m sitting there, barbecue sauce on my tiddies--”

Eventually, Lincoln would get to the point of his story; in this example, for...um, example...maybe the moral was, “Don’t get so focused on one goal (shooting that big bear) that you loose sight of other objectives in the war (getting rid of the wolf pack killing all the sheep or whatever).”

I would like to explain to you why telling long, rambling grandpa stories was such a power move:

Abe Lincoln was the president.

So his whole Cabinet had to listen.

And Abe Lincoln knew it.

They had to listen to this backwoods guy go on and on about how that one time the local long boatsman fell into the river actually serves as a metaphor for Gen. McClellan’s inability to take control of the troops; or how the rabid raccoon that lived in the local blacksmith’s shop can serve as a metaphor for acting too hastily when trying to take down the South.

Or, like, whatever.

Above: “All here in favor of me performing the entirety of Les Mis starring me as everyone, raise your hands.”

Apparently, Lincoln was also the kind of storyteller who, if there was a funny punchline at the end, took forever to get to the punch line because he’d start laughing hysterically at his own joke, and while many people thought it was incredibly endearing, others were like, “Boy, I wonder what it would be like if I dumped this entire fucking bottle of ink over the president’s head to get him to shut the fuck up.”

Spoiler alert: Lincoln did not, in fact, shut the fuck up. He was determined to teach folks a lesson through the the power of storytelling and also to help break the tension of a legitimately horrible war with the power of laughter.

Monopolizing the conversation to prove a point with anecdotes about frontier living that no one can escape?

Power. Move.

5. Those times he let his kids run amok in the White House and thought it was hilarious.

Lincoln had a four kids, all boys, who moved into the White House after he was elected president.

And these boys were little terrors.

To be fair, a vast majority of boys are terrors. Kids are terrors. They are small harbingers of chaos and discord with little regard for their fellow humans, which means they fit right in in the White House EYYYY POLITICAL COMMENTARY.

But Lincoln’s kids, apparently, were especially out of control.

Above: “Alright, enough pussy-footin’ around, Pops, fork over the dough and no one gets a kick in the nuts.”

Lincoln adored his boys, partly because he was a good dad and partly because he’d already had one child die tragically, so understandably, he was like, “Life is short and antibiotics haven’t been invented yet so we’re all going to die from getting paper cuts, probably; I’m just gonna let my boys do whatever the hell they want.”

And he kind of...did.

Willie and Tad Lincoln, his two youngest, brought tons of pets into the White House. Dogs, cats, birds...when people objected, Lincoln just sort of shrugged. He, too, was a huge animal lover and didn’t really care if ponies were clomping around the Oval Office. “My White House, my rules, my indoor ponies.”

The two Lincoln boys would dress up in military uniforms and have fake military drills and stage fake (LOUD) battles all over the White House, including when Dad was in a Cabinet meeting.

What did Dad do, you ask?

Laugh his head off.

While his kids would burst into Cabinet meetings, crawl under the table and kick important Senators’ legs and feet, generally causing a grade-A ruckus, Abe would try and fail to stifle his laughter.

Which, you know. Objectively isn’t the best parenting, but for Pete’s sake, they were at war, can’t they have a little fun? Jesus, lighten up, folks, they’re kids.

The Lincoln boys particularly irritated Sec. of War Edwin Stanton, but to be fair, almost everything irritated Sec. of War Edwin Stanton.

Above: “I have never had fun once, ever, in my life.”

Once again, Lincoln’s rationale was, “Life is fragile, one of my children already died, the country is at war, and kids make me laugh, so if they want to punch Sec. Stanton in the balls under the table, who am I to stop them?”

Also, Lincoln was the president, so nobody thought it was appropriate to go, “Um, hey? Mr.--Mr. President? Maybe you could tell your sons to, you know...not crawl under the table and interrupt, um...important...war strategy meetings?”

ALSO, Lincoln once wrestled a man twice his size to the ground without batting an eyelash, so you go tell him to make his kids behave. I dare you.

#abraham lincoln #listory #american history #us history #u.s. history

135 notes · View notes

non-binary-nightmare · 4 years

Text

Pills: Before the Chaos [Chapter 3]

Chpt 1 Chpt 2 Chpt 4 Chpt 5 Chpt 6 Chpt 7 Chpt 8

It’s gonna be a double upload today!! Or... Tonight.. If you’re in my time zone.

TW: LOT’S of arguing and cussing; Unsympathetic!Patton

THIS SERIES IS DISCONTINUED

----

Logan woke up with Patton lying next to him, sleeping quietly. He put his glasses on and went downstairs to make his coffee. While coming into the kitchen, Logan saw an anxious looking Deceit, sitting at the table.

“Is something wrong, Jan?”

“Yes, there is something really wrong. Romulus is two people now.”

“What? What are you talking about?” Logan asked and Deceit pointed to the two sitting in the living room. Logan looked out at them through the kitchen door. The one in green waved and the one in red just stared. Logan looked back at Deceit with a confused expression. “How do you know that they are both Romulus?”

“Well for starters they were both in Romulus’ room and I can’t find him anywhere. Oh, and another thing! Your fucking boyfriend was in the memory cabinet last night!”

“He was?”

“Yes! I saw him leaving while I was heading there to organize the memories.” Logan thought for a moment. “Do you know their names?”

“Yeah, they’re both creativity, just different versions of it. The one in the green outfit, his name is Remus. And the one in the red is Roman.”

“Okay. I’ll go talk to them.”

Logan left the kitchen and walked into the living room. “Roman, Remus, my name is Logan. I’m Thomas’ logic. It has come to my attention that you are both Thomas’ creativity?”

Roman and Remus nodded. “Okay. Might I ask what you center your creativity around?”

“I dunno. I like butts?” Remus said.

“I’m a prince!” Roman said, standing up and pulling out his sword. “Okay…” Logan said, writing some notes in his notebook. “I think I know what’s going on-”

“Logan?” Patton said, coming down the stairs. “Who are they?” He asked. “Well Patton, they are Thomas’ new creativity.”

“You mean it worked- I mean. Oh! Hi Kiddos! My name’s Patton but you can call me Dad!” Patton said.

“Hi. I’m Prince Roman!” Roman said, standing up and posing. “I’m Remus!” Remus said, also standing up, and posing the opposite way Roman did.

“Well it’s nice to meet you.” Patton says. “So what happened to Romulus?”

“I believe he split.” Logan said and Deceit walked in. “Split?” Patton asked. “Yes, Patton. He-”

“He FUCKING SPLIT?! YOU MOTHER FUCKING-!” Deceit yelled as he charged at Patton. Roman and Logan both had to hold onto Deceit to stop him. “What the heck Janus?” Logan asked. Deceit stood and took a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I just.. Lost it there. Umm. Patton why the hell did you split him?!” Deceit asked. “What do you mean?” Patton asked, tilting his head to the side. “What do I? What do I mean!? Who are you, Justin Fucking Bieber!?”

“Oh that’s a funny image! Justin fucking a beaver! HA! Imagine that!” Remus said, causing everyone to look at him. “Young man we do not talk like that in this household. Do you understand me?” Patton said and Remus just rolled his eyes. “Whatever.”

“See what you do, Deceit? You constantly talk back to me and you never listen to me! You’re setting a bad example!”

“Oh whatever! You’re the one setting a bad example! I’m done talking to you. Logan, why are they somewhat older than they were before the split?” Deceit asked. “Well because Patton pushed a forced splitting, Thomas’ mind is now forced to think of what is good and what is bad and therefore, they are both way more significant to Thomas now, making them young adults. I’d say around 18 to 21. Them separately, has more effect on Thomas, than them together.” Logan explained. “Oh look at my Logie! So smart!” Patton said as he wrapped his arms around Logan’s shoulders and kissed him on the cheek. “Thank you, Patton.” Logan said.

“Okay. What’s supposed to happen with us, then?” Roman asked. “Well, Roman, Remus and Deceit are going to go somewhere else, while me, Logan, and you stay here.” Patton said.

“What?” Everyone else asked in unison. “What? I just made up my mind on what I want to do. And clearly, Remus is the worse influence, therefore, you two, will no longer have any say in Thomas’ life.” Patton explained. “What?! Logan he can’t just do that, can he?” Deceit asked.

“Well, technically, yes. He does have a say in who has a ‘seat’ at the figurative table.”

“That’s bullshit!”

“Watch your language!” Patton yelled. “Uhh guys-” Roman said, but ended up being ignored. “Oh shut up! You should watch your actions! You need to stop being such a fucking stuck up BITCH and own up to them.” Deceit said. “Guys there’s-” Logan started. Patton put his hand on his chest in a dramatic way, mouth agape. “Deceit, how could you?”

“What? How am I doing something wrong? You’re the one messing Thomas up!”

“Logan! Tell him that I’m not doing anything wrong!”

“Okay, you’re right but guys-” Logan was cut off. “See! Even he agrees with me!”

“What?! Logan what the hell? Why do you always take his side? Even when he’s wrong!”

“Oh don’t try and make this about him!” Patton said. “GUYS!” Remus yelled. “WHAT?!” Patton and Deceit both yelled. “Look.” Remus said, pointing to the other side of the room. “Who is that?” Patton asked when he turned around. “I’m not sure. He showed up while you guys were arguing.” Logan said. “Oh. Well hi there, Kiddo!” Patton said. The small side didn’t say anything. He didn’t move, nor did he look at them. He sat with his head tucked in between his knees and his hands on his ears. “Kiddo?”

“He’s been sitting like that since you guys started yelling at each other.” Roman said. “That wasn’t even me that was yelling! It was Deceit!”

“What?! You were yelling too!” Deceit said. “I wasn’t but whatever.” Patton said as he walked over to the younger side. “Hey.. Kiddo.. It’s okay.. Can you look at me?”

The younger looked at Patton. “Can you tell me your name?” The smaller shook his head. “Well, what should we call you?” He shrugged. “Logan can you figure out what he represents from Thomas?” Deceit asked. “Well, let’s see… Avoiding eye contact, visibly shaken and scared, reluctant to speak, sensitive to loud noises… Maybe some sort of anxiety? I’ll have to check with Thomas to make sure though.” Logan said, leaving. “Then let’s just call him Anxiety!” Roman said. “Okay.. Anxiety, are you okay with that?” Patton asked. Anxiety nodded. “Great. Now, I’m going to make us some cookies and we can talk when they are done, okay? It’ll give you some time to get adjusted.” Patton said, walking to the kitchen. Anxiety nodded.

“Well Anxiety, my name is Roman!” Roman said, outstretching his hand towards Anxiety. Reluctantly, Anxiety took his hand, allowing Roman to help him stand up. “This is Remus, my brother, and this is Janus, Thomas’ deceit.” Roman said, pointing to each of them respectively. “Hello, Anxiety. I hope that my role with Thomas does not affect your view of me. I would love it if you stayed with me. I could teach you lots of things.” Deceit said. Anxiety shrugged.

“Okay I talked to Thomas and he’s said that he just now started feeling anxious. He said it wasn’t bad, it was just more than usual.” Logan said, startling everyone with the sudden pop up, walking into the kitchen to tell Patton the news. “Great! So it’s confirmed! You’re Anxiety! Let’s go create some chaos.” Remus said, wrapping his arm around Anxiety’s shoulders.

Taglist:

@misunderstoodshadowling @no-no-no-no-6 @grayson-22 @sanderssidesstuffs001 @nope-not-more @magimerlyn @fellinfire @chihuahuafaceappreciationblog @basiic-emo @crei-crei @safewordiscjstar @probablymebutimnotsure

#unsympathetic patton #abusive patton #patton sanders #roman sanders #logan sanders #remus sanders #virgil sanders #Janus Sanders #deceit sanders #thomas sanders #ask to be tagged //

13 notes · View notes

nyrator · 4 years

Text

some more ny life updates, feat. MBTI stuff, dreams, financial decisions, ACNH checklists, and Radiohead opinions

incredibly depressed lately to be honest, but trying not to be too depressed for this post- basically a place to vent without being super negative because it be public and stuff, helps calm me down, maybe

helping other people with depression is too hard for me, I think. Feels bad to distance myself, but I think avoiding rumination is all I can do when it gets to that point

decided to re-take one of those personality things recently because why not, friends were doing it. I don’t hold much weight to them personally but at least I seem to be consistently this result every few years

for reference, an earlier test:

https://www.16personalities.com/istp-personality

reading through the weaknesses and romantic parts, it almost eerie how it describes me. It’s wrong on the sex part, but feels right just about everywhere else. They even quote me on saying this at the end part. The nice thing is, apparently Kresna’s personality result is my ideal match, which is fitting.

I tend to think my personality is a very flawed one, unfortunately, at least when it comes to social relationships. I don’t like being flattered or praised, nor do I tend to show appreciation to those that deserve it, I feel. Feeling people are slighted by my lack of attention or affection for them more and more.

Energy in general is such a hard thing to grasp. Lately I just can’t seem to do or focus on anything, nor do I have any strong desires to do anything. Feels hard to draw or make anything, and I’m wondering how I’ll finish up that Artfight thing. All I want to do is lay in bed and sleep, maybe just change my sleep schedule and only be awake when no one else is, and just keep to myself

been laying in bed a lot lately, and I’ve noticed a trend in actually having dreams when I’m taking a nap- or at least, that weird “trying to take a nap but keeping eyes half-open basically because I don’t actually want to fall asleep” zone

both dreams I had this week involved different things that I forget, but the core part was basically my family assaulting me, pinning me to the wall, and speaking my darkest secrets into my ear.

First one was my late sister being a prick and possibly uncovering my secret and me trying to get rid of her, while her boyfriend grabs me by the throat and lifts me off the ground into the wall as she mocks me. Second one that I just had earlier tonight, I don’t even remember the context, but basically had my mother disgusted by me, forcefully pinning my arm behind my back and slamming me face first into a wall, telling me she’s aware and disgusted by all my secrets.

Earlier this month, I also had one of my first dreams in months, but it was one of my reoccurring humiliation dreams. Except this time, there was blood. It was a very uncomfortable dream.

I wonder if these dreams mean anything about my psyche or whatever lately.

but yeah, have a lot of money lately, yet still feels sickening to spend money on myself still. I feel like I’ve spent too much on myself lately, and it feels bleh. I like spending money on Kresna, but he doesn’t let me do it often, but it’s always appreciated when he does.

ended up setting up an eye exam in three weeks- decided to order my own frames this time, but shopping for frames is hard. Ended up buying these two (since I always seem to have to buy two pairs for some probably insurance-related reason), but frames are extremely hard to shop for, at least for me, and that lavender look I like is extremely hard to come by

I wonder if I show my appreciation for lavender too much- I think I want to go for thicker frames like the top one, though the bottom ones are like my old frames (same company), and have that metallic lavender look that I love. If I ever had a dream car, it’d be in that color, honestly.

speaking of cars, my neighbor is trying to sell us her old 1997 Saturn for $250, but I’m not sure if I want it, to be honest- One, it’s so old, two, it’s a stick, which I only have basic knowledge on how to drive, and three, I don’t like driving. I think my mother told her yes, which is unfortunate, but we’ll see how it goes.

some other financial decisions lately- bedding, bottles, and slippers (not shown- the more convenient backless purple slippers I now regularly wear, as well as more personal items)

throw pillows are good for holding while sleeping and for preventing my arms from waking up entirely numb sometimes

been thinking about buying more clothes and furniture, but now that I probably won’t be getting the extra $1000 with my unemployment, it’s even harder to justify buying anything. I’d like a new desk, at least- something able to display things would be nice. My boss told me I’ll be going back to work soon hopefully, so that would be nice, especially since this virus is a good excuse to not bring back my coworker and to give me full-time hours, but even then, spending money is hard. Been thinking about a new mousepad since I’ve had this old one for longer than I can remember (probably a college gift), but even something simple like that is tough.

in other random news, slowly trying to make progress in ACNH still- and by that I mean I’ve finally started keeping a checklist for items (had Bugs/Fish already, but now have DIYs and man there’s so many DIYs I’m missing, also Dresses - Umbrella tabs of clothing, basically everything but Tops and Bottoms so far, and mannn, there’s a lot of stuff, but I basically have almost every accessory/sock/shoe in purple/pink at least, now just grinding my way through the rest of the colors I skipped. Also caught a Golden Stag today, only three beetles left (Giraffe, Hercules, and Elephant, I believe)

should probably start saving my extra bugs/fish for making models for Justin Beaver and Hot Topic, I realize- collecting those models really doesn’t interest me much, but at the same time, I have a weird obsession with trying to 100% Animal Crossing games (at a reasonable speed, of course- figure I’d wait until next year to worry about those two)

haven’t tried dreaming yet and honestly my island is still a mess that I’m still hesitant because I still have no idea what to fill it with or how to organize it

one last thing I did buy is the rest of the Radiohead albums though- I now own all their albums, except disc 2 of In Rainbows, though. Should probably listen to that on Youtube, not sure where to find a physical release of it. Decided to rank them, because I like ranking things apparently, even though overall it doesn’t mean much since my tastes shift constantly, and every album is good to listen to in my opinion (honestly more of a way of solidifying a future “best of” playlist)

Personal feelings of ranking at the moment:

Hail to the Thief (every song is top tier, I just want to shout them all out, but in particular I think “A Punchup at a Wedding“, “Myxomatosis“, “2+2=5″, and “Sit down. Stand up” are my favorites)

In Rainbows (my old favorite before HttT blew it away, though I think ”Weird Fishes/Arpeggi” is still my favorite Radiohead song, also shout outs to “Videotape” and “Jigsaw Falling Into Place”)

Kid A (I was lukewarm to the album at first, but it has a lot of tunes that stand out to me, “Idioteque” is also one of my favorite Radiohead songs, also shout outs to "Everything in Its Right Place" and "How to Disappear Completely")

OK Computer (this is where placings start getting fuzzy, “Paranoid Android” was their first song I ever listened to and loved back in high school, thanks to Ergo Proxy, great song, though I think I’ve oversaturated myself to this album by having it play as my driving music when I still had a car. Shout outs to “Exit Music (For A Film)” and “Let Down”. “Karma Police” is also up there but feels a bit less than those I suppose)

A Moon Shaped Pool (I’d place this higher when I’m looking for a more somber/reflective album to listen to, otherwise about tied with OK Computer. My favorite on the album, “Daydreaming”, is what reintroduced me to Radiohead and got me obsessed with them- this album was my first album, though it’s definitely softer compared to their usual stuff. Also driving music so a bit oversaturated, and it feels harder to shout out specific songs, but shout outs “Ful Stop”, “Glass Eyes”, and heck, basically most of the later songs on the album)

Amnesiac (Some good songs, but just not to the levels of the others. “Knives Out” is a great song though, and I tend to like the first half of the album more than the last half, last half is pretty weak to me honestly- though I got it fairly recently, so may require more listenings)

Pablo Honey (the latest album I got, so it’s still fresh in my head and thus nothing is permanent with it compared to the others, but mannn, people undersold this album, it feels solid front to back. I honestly want to put it higher, I think. Hard to identify individual songs, but shout outs to “Blow Out” in particular, “I Can’t” as well- but again, every song is great, so might say it’s close to A Moon Shaped Pool levels in rankings)

The Bends (one of their first albums I got, also a car album, but definitely didn’t click with me like the others. I have warmed up to it more than I originally did at least- I mainly got the album because heck yeah “Street Spirit (Fade Out)” is a great track, also shout outs to “The Black Star”, that’s like, one of my random “mouth out the chorus in the car” songs. I also tend to have “High and Dry” in my head a lot for some reason, but yeah, good car music, but not much else going for it I think)

The King of Limbs (the second-latest album I own and also the least listened to album I own, but it feels very... non-standout-ish. Like it’s almost too simple-sounding, or repetitive, or something, definitely the weakest album in my personal opinion. Can’t even think of a song to shout out, so I guess “Lotus Flower”, honestly, but again, I need to listen to the album more. Good background noise but just nothing that jumps out at me)

but yeah radiohead is definitely my favorite music group, I’d say, and also realize almost every album has a bonus disc, so hm, more music to find it seems (admittedly I’m not a fan of live music in general, which seems to fill up a lot of these bonus discs)

#text stuffs #nyrants

2 notes · View notes

james-bucky-barnackle · 6 years

Text

Two Night Stand (Part 10)

Synopsis: (AU) You found yourself at a club drinking away to forget about the stress of your shitty job as the assistant of the biggest Editor in New York, and end up hooking up with the man of your dreams only to wake up to a nightmare when you find out he’s the son of your boss.

PART 9 | 2NS Masterlist

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: idk something a lil wild

Word Count: 3,252

A/N: I want to be friends with other fanfic writers :( I’m giving Bucky the screen time he deserves on Part 11, I’m really sorry I love u

I feel slightly relieved to have finished getting ready and am now sitting next to Winnie in the back of the car. With her being her usual looming self, I pull my phone out and finally find the courage to read the texts Bucky sent earlier. “At the park, wish you were here.” I scroll through another, “Can I drop by your place later?” and another, “I miss you.”

I’m trying to suppress a smile, knowing his mom is right beside me. The both of us are waiting for Vision who’s our main driver for tonight, and well, every night to be honest. I look at my wrist watch, Bucky’s probably five minutes away from the airport ready to pick up the twins. I realize I forgot to inform Wanda about the sudden switch when my phone vibrates. I peek at Winnie who’s occupied on her iPad and I answer the call, apologizing to her before I do.

“Where are you?! I’m already with Pietro!” Wanda doesn’t waste her time.

“Y/N!” I hear Pietro shout in the background.

“About that... I can’t make it, but-”

“You can’t make it? You forgot, didn’t you? I just told you this morning. Who’s going to drive us?” I turn my head closer to the door, maybe I should get out the car. Oh, Vision’s already out the door, I guess I’m going to continue whispering and hope Winnie doesn’t get annoyed.

“I didn’t forget! Okay, I might’ve. But I got it, someone’s already there to pick you guys up.”

“And who might that be? You know I don’t trust ubers.”

“He’s not an uber.”

“Who?!” Is she really asking me? How do I tell her it’s Bucky, without telling his name? I’m pretty sure I don’t need to turn the phone on speaker for Winnie to hear the whole conversation, seeing as how Wanda is too frustrated.

“You know! It’s-” Bucky.

“Who?”

“Wanda, you’re ridiculous. He drives a-” wait a second, Winnie probably knows what her son drives. “A car.”

“Brilliant description, I completely trust you to describe the suspect when you witness me getting murdered.” Winnie interrupts me, eyes still on her device.

“Who’s gonna pick us up Y/N?”

“You know Ja-ah- Bu--- JB…” Winnie whips her head at me, I suddenly panic. “Justin Beaver.” I continue, and face Winnie, putting my hand on the receiver, “it’s my friend’s bachelorette party, JB is the stripper’s name I hired for her.” Where the hell did that come from?

“Do I look like I care? Finish that phone call quick. It’s draining my brain cells.” Winnie responds.

“Right.” I say.

“Justin Beaver? Stripper? What the hell is going on? Y/N?” Wanda interjects.

“Wanda, you buffoon, you know who JB is. The JB from last night - and every night, you know, JB.” I’m really embarrassed about this, what is happening?

“Oh! That JB. I get it now. So, where is he?” Wanda suddenly calms down.

“I’ll text him, your number so he can call you when he gets there.”

“Okay. But I’m still mad at you for forgetting.”

“I’ll make it up to you when I get home.”

“You better.” I drop the call and text Bucky… JB, Wanda’s number telling him to call her when he gets there. Amazing, now my boss and our driver thinks I hang out with a stripper every night.

When we get to the venue, it’s spunky, music from the 2000’s playing in the background, I try to hide my amusement, I feel like I’m a youngin bopping to T-Pain. Winnie rolls her eyes and proceeds to walk as I follow her. The benefit was organized by the students of the Fashion Institute with the theme revolving around RnB, and I have no complaints. I’m surprised we even came, if Winnie knew this was how the whole thing was gonna be, I doubt she even would’ve RSVP’d. We proceed to her table and sit down, and I scan the crowd for anyone approaching, making sure I prep Winnie on their backgrounds before engaging in conversation.

Winnie’s smile is beautiful, she should win an Oscar for this acting alone. Our table of ten is slowly getting filled leaving two chairs, one on each our sides. I scan the people on the table as Winnie converses with them on matters I have no idea on, and it registers to me that the seat is for George Barnes. I excuse myself from the table and I walk to the organizer posted near the entrance.

“Hi, can I ask who responded no, on table one?” I say and the young man shuffles through the sheets on his clipboard.

“Table one, one -- Barnes, George. That all?” I nod slowly at his query.

“Thanks,” I reply turning my body to head back to my table. It’s not my job to make him come, but I feel a little bad for my boss and think that two weeks from now, I wouldn’t feel anything about it, nor know of any solution to fill that seat.

When I get back to the table, I see Steve sitting on the seat next to Winnie. He gives a small wave when he sees me, just as Winnie glances among the other people in the table. I give him a quick smile before taking my seat. Winnie’s in an ongoing conversation with one of the elders at the table, she can’t help but respond considering she’s a lot older than my boss is.

“Nice to hear both the Barnes men are back in New York.” her wrinkled lips painted a ghastly magenta. “How long has it been?”

“A year, Cecil.” Winifred quipped keeping it short. I pore over Cecil, stop asking my boss. I haven’t been working for Winnie that long. How did she manage living alone in that house for a year?

“Is George not coming tonight?” Her tone playful.

“He’s busy with work, how’s the divorce coming, Cecil?” My eyes grow wide at Winnie’s response, Cecil became suddenly mute. Steve swoops in and changes the conversation as the staff start serving food. He and Winnie get into a very deep conversation about his and her son’s latest project venture, and I continue chewing on my food. I wonder how Bucky’s doing? I hope Wanda and Pietro aren’t causing him too much trouble. I text him and ask him, I’ll probably need to call him later.

One of the performers start singing on stage and the lights are dimmed down, warm light focused only on each table as we eat our dinner. The singer’s voice is sultry and beautiful, it’s amazing how her voice sounds like a perfect record. People have started standing up and dancing, slowly swaying to the beat. A romantic jive of rhythm, I smile when Steve asks Winnie to dance. She’s reluctant at first, but eventually agrees. Among the people on the dancefloor are Tony and Pepper, nodding politely at Winnie’s direction when they see her.

I continue munching on my food, hiding in my little space when I feel a tap on my shoulder, it’s one of the staff, with a bouquet in hand. I look at Winnie, George might actually have changed his mind.

“Is this for Winifred Barnes?” I ask, picking up the flowers.

“No Ma’am, it’s for you.” Oh, so maybe it’s from Bucky? I don’t think this is a good idea, giving me flowers in a crowded room.

“From who?” I ask and the waiter moves a little to his left to reveal the sender. The tall meaty long-haired blond, I despise so much. He waves and smiles at me, and I raise both my eyebrows and mutter an “oh,” gently lifting it up and giving a fake smile as a sign of thanks, then I shake my head. I give it back to the waiter.

“Thanks, but tell him – no thanks.” I say as he confusingly accepts the bouquet back. Before he could walk back to Thor’s table, he’s already halfway near mine.

“She’ll take that,” he says when he’s within earshot. I roll my eyes and rest my elbow on the backrest of my chair.

“I won’t,” I smile at the waiter.

“She will,” Thor sputters, nodding.

“Nooo, I won’t.” the waiter sways himself left and right not knowing where to give it.

“But you love flowers.”

“Yeah, you’re right.” I say and he quirks an eyebrow. “But not these flowers,” I continue as I push the waiter lightly in his direction.

“Why not?” he pushes him back to me.

“Because these flowers are from you.” I push the waiter back.

“Take the damn flowers,” I hear an elderly woman in my table shout, it’s probably Cecil.

“I would, but I won’t. You can take them though.” I beam at Thor.

“Yeah, y-you really should, Ma’am. I’d like to be out of this situation.” The waiter interrupts.

“Good idea!” I grab the flowers and hand it to Cecil. She happily accepts and hugs it like a baby.

“Hey!” Thor loudly whispers, I give him a shrug and the waiter takes the opportunity to escape.

“Can I get the man too?”

“Why yes, Cecil. You can get him too.” I say turning back to see her blushing.

“Y/N, I need to talk to you.”

“What is it?” I respond, my back turned.

“Outside.”

“What a request.”

“Please?”

“For Pete’s sake, talk to him! Or I will.” Oh Cecil, I honestly have no problem with you talking to this man.

“Y/N, please.”

“Go. Away.” As I say this, I see Steve and Winnie coming back to our table, and I feel relieved. Now Thor can’t bother me.

“Thor Odinson!” Winnie greets him, what?!

“Winifred,” he smiles and they hug. Steve stands behind her, smiling at him. Okay, at least Steve doesn’t know him. What a leech.

“What are you doing at our table?” I hear Winnie say, and I huff – what reason could he possibly say?

“I’m here to talk to your lovely assistant, apparently I’m having a hard time hearing her response.” I whip my head at him, the audacity.

“I told him, you were on the dancefloor, that he should wait until you came back.” I say looking into his eyes.

“As much as I’d love to converse with you Winnie, I’m very curious to talk to Y/N,” how confident has he gotten? How is he so sure Winnie would even let me-

“What are you waiting for, Y/L/N? Get up.” Winnie commands. What the hell just happened?

“Thank you, Winifred.”

“I don’t think she wants to though, pal.” Steve interjects. I silently thank him.

“She does,” Winnie peeks at Steve then back at Thor. ”I should be thanking you, poor girl doesn’t have a life outside the office. Here she is thinking she’s too big for a supermodel.” Ouch? That stung. Steve’s face is etched with concern, but he gives me an apologetic smile. “Thor, I’d love to see you on the cover of The View, soon.”

“Wonderful, I look forward to it.” Thor nods then offers a hand to me, I ignore it and push my chair back, hitting him before standing up. I hear Thor wince and see Steve smirking, I wrinkle my nose at him.

Thor walks me to a balcony, leaving the loudness of the benefit muffled behind us. There are only few people on the balcony with us, mostly smokers and having conversations of their own.

“I don’t see why you need me seeing as how Winnie’s already fond of you. You can stop sleeping your way to the top.” I say before he says anything, he looks appalled and I’m fairly satisfied.

“Y/N, it’s not that.”

“Then what is it? Make it quick, I don’t have time for leeches.”

“I want to apologize for what happened to us.”

“Is that all? Are we done?”

“You’re not hearing me out.”

“Yes, I am, Thor. You don’t just come and talk to me for no reason. There is always a reason, I know you’re not apologizing to me because of your morale.”

“Y/N, I really am sorry. I didn’t mean for those things to happen, we were so good together.”

“Were we?” I respond in a sing song voice. This is all a business deal, as far as I know.

“We were, we had fun times. I picked you up from work every day and then you’d drop by my castings and cheer me on like the greatest girlfriend you were, then we’d grab pizza at your favorite place. Everything was simple.” Times with him back then were simple, and they were comfortable. I thought I was secure, turns out he had bigger dreams and no care on how he gets it.

“Where are you getting at? Simple doesn’t suit your current image. Are you getting married to Jane? Is that it? Are you apologizing to all your exes before you tie the knot? Because if that’s what this is, then yes I forgive you, okay? Can I go now?” I didn’t expect to see him smile at what I said.

“I broke up with Jane.”

“Hold up, what?!”

“When I saw you at McDonald’s the other day, I just knew it wasn’t right.” I have a hard time taking him serious at the word McDonald’s. “I didn’t realize how much I missed you.”

“You are insane,”

“I am, I know that.”

“Come to the fashion ball with me.”

“I’m in a relationship, Thor.”

“With who? I don’t see you posting any photos online. Who could be better than me?” Is he really asking me this? I laugh, oh mister.

“You don’t even wanna know.” My lips turn up, he’s way better than you.

“Oh, I do.”

“You don’t.” Gosh I want to punch this guy; his ego is off the roof. That’s when I realize what this is. “You’re going to use me again. Come to the fashion ball with you? Why? Because Jane doesn’t work in the same industry? Leave me alone, Thor.” I start walking away and he grabs my arm, I pull back and his grip tightens.

“Why do you say that?”

“Because I’ve known you long enough to.”

“Please, Y/N.” He pleads.

“Thor, you’re hurting me.”

“I’m not using you. I really do miss you.”

“You just made yourself from douche to creepy real quick, Thor. Let. Me. Go.” It’s official, I’m going to break his wrist off. I don’t care how hard it’s gonna be with his size, I’m going to.

“Hey there cowboy, I think she doesn’t want to talk to you.” I hear someone behind me and when I look, I’m surprised to see her wink back at me. It’s Dolores. “Let her go.” Dolores’ height is towering over me, Thor only a few inches taller. He lets me go and before he can even say anything, she cuts him off. “Leave, before I scream and the photographers get their hands on their biggest paycheck yet.”

Thor closes his eyes for a brief moment, breathing heavy before leaving. I wrap my hand around the wrist he was holding, feeling a little pain.

“Who was that guy? Can’t really have everything huh? He’s cute but he’s got the attitude of a high school jock.” Dolores chuckles, drinking her glass of champagne.

“Yeah, thanks.”

“Hey, I know you.” My eyebrows perch up. “I saw you in Winnie’s office.” Oh, thank god, I thought it was something else.

“I’m her assistant.”

“Oh, I see. I’m Dolores, by the way.”

“Yes, I know you. I’m Y/N.”

“Cool name. Where you seated?”

“At table one,” I smile.

“Of course, Winnie always has the best seats.”

“Which reminds me, I need to get back. Thank you for saving me earlier.” I can’t believe this is the same woman who came with her aunt the other day.

“I’ll walk with you, can’t have that barbaric blond hollering around.”

“You don’t have to,” I laugh.

“Nah, it’s fine. I’m on my way back to my table too anyway.”

Half an hour had passed and Winnie finally wants to head home. I’m sick and tired of this place, my run in with Thor earlier only ruined my night. Winnie didn’t seem to care, but that might be because I tried my best to look normal. I’m glad she didn’t ask me about Thor, or how he even knew me. I doubt she even cares, she was probably just bored. I called Vision and am now getting in the car with her. The whole ride is silent, as usual, but more so because I still can’t get my annoyance from earlier. I hate him. Who was he to think he could just come back and ask me anything again, after all he’s done. Vision drops Winnie first, and I instantly feel ten times more tired than I actually was when she gets out the vehicle. I drift off into sleep the moment we set for my place. Vision’s voice wakes me up from my slumber and I hastily pick up my things and exit. I thank him and he drives off into the night. I can’t wait to get some sleep. I’ve been up since 5AM this morning.

Slowly ascending the steps, my eyes are already failing me, I’m blinking myself awake. A few more steps and I’ll be in my bed, my sweet, sweet bed. When I finally reach the door, I shuffle through my bag, looking for my keys and not one second passes, I already quit and proceed to knocking. I yawn, and click my tongue. I finally hear the door knob turning and I rest on it, ready to fall in Wanda’s arms when she opens the door.

When it opens, I let myself fall and I’m immediately caught. Wow, Wanda feels a little bigger and stronger. I look up and I see a pair of blue eyes looking at me, expression clearly entertained. “Hey doll.”

“Oh my gosh,” I blink still enveloped in his arms. “Why are you here?”

“Not even a thank you?” My cheeks heat up, I feel guilty.

“I’m sorry. Thank you,” I whisper, lifting myself a little higher to kiss his cheek, and he chuckles. “Thank you for picking up the twins for me.”

“Sure thing, doll.” I hug him tighter and snuggle my head on his chest, my body completely limb. He’s really strong, I can’t stand up any longer. “Okay! Maybe we should get you to bed.”

“Where are they?”

“They’re out.”

“It’s already late. Why did they leave you here alone?”

“Baby, it’s only 9:30.” Mmm baby.

“What?”

“Yes,” he says kissing my forehead. “Come on, you need to sleep.” I loosen my grip on him and find balance for my feet on the ground so I can start walking to my room, when Bucky scoops me up and carries me. He laughs at my reaction, and I quickly recover, lacing my one arm around his neck as he starts walking. “Have you been drinking?”

“No, this is how I am when I’m tired.” I whisper closely to his ear, and trail kisses on his jaw. Bucky looks amused and shakes his head, pushing the door open with his feet. He gently places me on the bed and I reach for him. “Bucky.”

“What is it?” He says as he takes my shoes off. Holy crap, I really like this guy.

“Can you stay?” I slide my arm across the sheet like I’m making one wing off a snow angel.

“Oh, Doll.”

PART 11

Check my other stuff out too? | M A S T E R L I S T

Feedback, likes and reblogs are appreciated!!!

HMU WITH AN ASK IF U WANNA GET TAGGED

Permanent taglist!!! @gracielou0518 / @memory-of-a-goldfish / @thatbitchsaidhi / @xxashy999xx / @queenlouisa2001 / @shliic / @speggehi / @blackdaisybitch / @hiddlestannn / @tuliptx / @m-a-t-91 / @milkshakeslou / @fireboltrose7559 / @justmesadgirl / @makloveswriting / @cococola-cocaine / @impalatobakerstreet / @laochbaineann / @justakpopfan4 / @kiramotherofsnails / @yknott81 / @heartssick / @thisismysecrethappyplace / @oldwhalien / @padackles2010 / @lolabean1998 / @ayee-style

Taglist!!! @ohmygodjungkook / @everest98 / @thewhinersoldier / @projectxhappiness / @bookwormandfangirl / @vivianbabz / @you-phxria / @secretlyaclosetedmuffin / @heathermyroomfriend / @procrastinatingvirgo / @snuggleducky / @imissyoualittlemoreeveryday / @ladymelissastark / @severuined / @wisestydia-15 / @rap-game-winona-ryder / @bellagrayson-wayne / @anamcg317 / @janeyboo / @just-add-butter / @sebbystanlover-vk/ @babygirlizz / @live-in-the-now10 / @minniesugakookie / @turdblossommm / @keenkryptonitedelusion / @crazybutconfidentaf / @rodgersbuchanan / @ellaenchanted91 / @5-seconds-of-sarcasmm / @lowkeysebby / @buckybarnes4lyfe / @ella-full-of-secrets / @cluuuuuur / @chingaderastillidie / @homiesexualbucky / @inlovewith3 / @lost-and-wandering-alone / @all-the-fand0ms / @sleepretreat / @bojabee / @jessas25 / @belledamsceno / @astrid345 / @deanlenaz / @musicals-n-chill / @amiteran / @janineabad / @vdeylyn / @mrsjostin / @karollbey / @shawns-marvel / @ireallyneedacoolusername / @xrosegoldwolfx / @hcliff56 / @damnjoekeeryy / @oldwhalien / @ahoverfly / @valentinasancia / @abluepenguinlove / @hawaiiantozier / @royalestrellas / @jitterbuck / @fairchild21 / @pinkisokay / @kali-rambles / @flopmalum / @just-a-social-casualty-1 / @spidergirl2017/ @acidparadox / @ria132love / @hoe4sebstan / @kaylaphantomhive / @justreadingthesefanfics / @jsmith509 / @granpafrisbee / @immajustread / @lokigreyvatore / @anxiety-in-a-getaway-car / @jademox / @fictiongurl / @allithewriter / @mp8130 / @justreadingthesefics / @honeyblood-babydoll-cindervox

260 notes · View notes

latin-dr-robotnik · 5 years

Text

Forces 2nd anniversary: My avatar collection!

Sonic Forces turns 2 today! I wanted to return to the game just to play for a couple of hours, maybe find something new (spoilers: it really didn’t happen) and, most importantly, share my avatars and their stories.

Back around the first months of the game I made a handful of characters, following a cool backstory set-up or trying to recreate already existing Sonic characters using the game’s tools. I’m gonna split this post right here to not clog up your dashboards (yeah, I love you all too), but feel free to join the fun!

1. Sally Acorn (kinda)

Back during pre-release, one of the biggest theories around the fandom expressed that Forces may be set in the Freedom Fighters universe. Even back then it was a wacky theory for a mainline Sonic game, but I liked the idea (even tho one of my headcanons says Forces is set straight after Chronicles). So, when I got my hands on the game, the first character I created was a kind of a Sally knock-off, and I stuck with her over the entire game, unlocking more clothes to try and recreate her as best as I could. Forces character creation limitations are going to be a constant in this post, and this is the best I could come up with, but I’m still happy with the results. Sally is a wolf now, lmao.

2. Hipster Boom Sonic

Another big theory going around the fandom back then was that the third playable character was going to be Boom Sonic, but after SEGA and Sonic Team saw how hard Rise of Lyric bombed, decided to instead do a player-created original character as the third gameplay pillar. I don’t think that theory has much solid ground to stand on, but back in 2017 I for sure ran off to the avatar creation screen right after beating the game, and made my own take on Boom Sonic. It’s pretty AU, but in a nice kinda way.

Headcanon goes as follows: Classic Sonic got warped through time and space because of the Phantom Ruby, and so did this older Sonic from the Boom dimension. “Hipster” Boom Sonic is a completely different kind of Sonic, one that has settled down and was having a nice, chill life until the Phantom Ruby shenanigans struck his dimension; now he’s working with the two other Sonics to try and stop this madness, and to return home with his friends and his special someone (yeah it’s who you think it is).

3. Normal (bootleg) Bunnie Rabbot

Yeah, another freedom fighter. You know, I’m not a “Freedom Fighters are the GOAT” type of guy (I don’t even like the extended Archie Sonic Universe), but what I do like a lot is the OG SatAM universe. After doing Sally, I thought: “Hey, Bunnie could be mostly recreated in this game, right?” And I could’ve gone pretty far with things like the robotic gloves and shoes, but I rapidly went on another tangent: recreating Bunnie, but without the robotic stuff, maybe like “a normal girl”, if you like. I loved the results.

Also, yeah, I think every single one of my old characters had headsets, it was part of my headcanon about radio comms on the Resistance.

4. Carlos (OC)

Finally, an original character (do not steal)! Carlos is my first-ever OC (yeah I never bothered making my own OC until Forces), he’s heavily into technology stuff (that’s why he’s rocking all those Mega Drive clothes), he loves Chao a lot (in fact he is carrying his Chao bag all the time), and checking my old Sonic Forces review (in spanish, btw), I came up with a pretty cool backstory for him:

Carlos was a Metropolis resident, working as IT for one of the city’s biggest companies until Eggman attacked. After the Eggman Empire took over, Carlos was left unemployed, and one night had to flee his home after getting into explosive trouble with a patrol of Eggman’s robots on a Metropolis back alley. That event caught the attention of the Resistance, who guided Carlos to their HQ and made him the new recruit. Now Carlos uses his technical skills to hack and slash through Eggman’s forces, looking to free his home from the oppresing regime of Dr. Eggman.

5. Blaze the Cat (I guess)

I wanted to recreate Blaze, but it proved to be a pretty tough task to achieve. So, I tried to mix a couple of her designs from the Mario & Sonic Olympics games, Sonic Riders AND her official design. Shadow’s shoes were the closest thing to her original shoes I could find (I’m still trying to find a replacement, 2 years later), the gloves are part of the Riders look (now that I think about it, I could try to match her Riders design more closely), and Amy’s dress is not that far from one of her designs from M&S.

6. Star the Bear (OC)

Holy shit, another OC! By this point on the game I started to feel more confortable around the idea of making my own characters (it’s a one way trip, I tell ya!), so I tried to make a character that wasn’t exactly my cup of tea.

Star’s backstory isn’t as developed as Carlos’, but I wanted to make him kind of a up-and-coming pop star, something like Justin Beaver from Sonic Boom but more humble. Star was performing live at Sunset City when the Eggman assault began, and in turn had to seek shelter with the not-yet-formed Resistance. Inspired by Silver’s fashion sense (he’s such a wild diva, I love it), Star jumpstarted (heh) his career singing a cover of Dreams of an Absolution. Also, I made up that last part just for this post, lmao.

7. OVA Knuckles

I think I made this character based on a funny tweet I saw shortly after release. The game gives you Knuckles’ shoes, Boom-style gloves and his cowboy hat from the OVA, of course I was going to make a character with those tools and put him alongside the real Knuckles (yeah that’s my screenshot).

le funny meme, haha.

8. Amy Rose

Don’t lie to me, you also tried this on your own. Looking at the Cube Wispon I thought: “man! it’s such a wasted opportunity to not have Amy playable in this game!”

I mean, the game gives you almost every single tool for recreating Amy, EXCEPT her quills, headband AND her right shade of pink. Still, this couldn’t stop the SonAmy shipping hype train and I’m not the only one that made this character only for the Tag Team stages. Feels great to take over the world, stage by stage, as Amy.

8.5. Amy Rose (Wedding variant)

“After years of love and specially patience, Amy asked Sonic the big question once again, and he finally said yes! But shortly after, during an unfortunate chain of events, the world ended under Eggman’s domination. Oh, the irony!”

AU as fuck, but hey, that was my shipping side during 2017. Nowadays this could very well tie-in with my now-abandoned Celebrity Life fic thingy, tho. I’m currently thinking of doing her Runners Gothic Amy design.

9. The most recent one

I think I made this caracter during mid-2018 or even later. She’s my current avatar and haven’t thought of a backstory or even a name yet. I believe I got inspired when I first tried to turn Amy into a mourning widow (that got dark fast lmao), but then made my own character dressing in the almighty black color. Maybe one day I will come up with a name and a backstory.

And that’s all, folks! If you reached this far, first of all thank you! I put a lot of thought into my characters and I guess that’s why I have 50+ hours of playtime, also I hope all my efforts made you maybe laugh, or maybe inspired you. Don’t hesitate in joining the conversation, specially if you have your own characters to share. Let’s make this Forces anniversary one hell of a party featuring all kinds of avatars.

#sonic the hedgehog #sonic forces #holy shit look at this post's lenght #i got carried away on so many part #but i had lots of fun making my characters and writing this post #forces did plenty things wrong #but i'm kinda glad they knocked it out of the park with the avatar creation #really cool shit right here

0 notes

justanontherwinchester · 7 years

Text

Hunters Don’t Cry: Part 5

Pairings: Dean x Reader x BestFriend Sam

Summary: Catch up here

The reader and Dean have to make a choice but can Dean step up to the plate?

Author’s Note: Thank you for so much positive feedback, lovies. You are all amazing! If you want to be tagged, please ask. Also I am accepting ideas for one shots/stories!

Warnings: Language

"Oh, their so perfect, (Y/N)." Sam cooed at his newborn nieces. They were perfect. They were identical, green eyes and ash blond hair. They looked like their father.

"Nine months pregnant and they come out looking like Dean." I sat in my bed holding one the unnamed newborns.

"He would be so happy right now."

"I know Sammy, I know." I looked at these little girls and I saw the world. They were my world and nothing else mattered.

"What are you naming them? This one already has Dean's mugshot face down." He grinned and tapped on her little nose. "Bop"

"Brinley Ellen and Brielle Johanna Winchester." I knew these two were going to be strong, so they needed to be named after strong women. I knew they were going to have hunting in their blood, but that world was behind me and they were ahead.

"You mean to tell me Sam was there the day they were born. Sam was the one who held my daughters? It was fucking Sam?!" Dean was screaming and being dramatic, like normal.

"Well it could have been you Dean, but here we are." I was standing across the room from him as he packed his bags. Our hunt was over and we were supposed to be taking time off. That wasn't happening. There was a Ghoul infestation in a small town in North Carolina, people were dropping left and right.

“Yeah, here we are. We are both grown adults now. Do they.. do they even know about me." His voice broke as he tossed his shirts on top of the other clothes. He was hurting, but so was I. I walked over to him grabbing his shirts and started folding them, how I used to.

"Of course they do Dean."

"Do they know me as their father?" He looked at me like I had ripped his heart in two.

"No." He looked away from me and clenches his fist. "You're Uncle SamSam's brother. You travel a lot and that's why you never visit. The stories Sam tells them, you're a superhero in their eyes." I felt the tears coming. "You are their superhero Dean. When Brinley grows up she wants to be like Uncle Dean. Brielle wants to be a mermaid. They are smart and strong. They were born to be hunters, but I don't want that life for them. I didn't get a choice. We didn't get a choice. I want them to be kids."

I've never seen Dean so emotional. I've never seen him this hurt. He pulls me into him, holding me but not saying anything. His hand rubbed up and down my back, just like he used to. His face was burrowed in my hair, nuzzling to get closer.

"I'll show you I'm a decent man. I'll show you I can be a good father. I want our girls home." That was the words I wanted him to say all along. "I'm so sorry for ever making you be alone. I would take it all back if I could. I can't. So I have to live with it. I don't ever want you to forgive me for what I did to you, to them. I can't forgive myself. I don't ever expect for you to love me but know I will love you until the end of time. Know that I will love them and never deny them. Even if one is weird and likes that Justin Beaver. I want nothing more than seeing their booster seats in the back of Baby, with you by my side. I want to accidentally sit on one of those damn Barbie dolls for the millionth time. I want to do it with you. Hell, I want a whole litter of Winchesters. I wanted that since we were young. I don't know what I was thinking when I let you go. But I fucked up and I'll never forgive myself. When you're ready, I would love to finally meet them. I want to know my baby girls."

I was crying, no, I was sobbing until I couldn't breathe. I knew Dean Winchester. This was my Dean who was talking. Whoever it was back then wasn't my Dean. Even then I wasn't ready, it needed to happen. Not right now though.

"I fucking hate you so much." My face buried deeper into his chest and he just held me tighter. "I'm sorry I didn't fight, Dean. I'm sorry I left. I was just done. I was just so hurt and lost. When you said those things to me, it was the straw that broke the camels back. Give us this hunt. It's going to be about two weeks, give me two weeks to decide."

"Okay." He let go and placed a tender kiss on my forehead. "Two weeks."

"Do you want to see them though?" He looked at me with a bit of confusion. I pulled the photo album out of my duffle, it wasn't much but it was memories. "From birth to now."

He started flipping through the album. He smiled and reacted to the photos better than I could have imagined. I pointed through guiding them.

"This was the day they were born." I was holding both of them, Sam was on my right and Samantha was on my left. "Oh, this was their first bath and this was their first birthday. Brielle loves cake but Brinley loves pie. Everything in pie form, that girl will eat. This was the first time they had spaghetti and here's Brielle holding a duck." In that moment, everything had changed. It was real. They were real to him. He kept flipping through the photos as he watched them age before his eyes. "They both love classic rock. Brielle enjoys AC/DC and Brinley swears Guns and Roses is the best thing in the world."

"Their beautiful." He wiped his tears and continued flipping through.

"They look just like you and act like it too. They are pure Winchester. You couldn't denied them if you tried."

"I would never want to." He came to the end of the book and was disappointed, he was wanting more.

"Samantha has basically every day of their lives recorded and tons more pictures. I can have her email the videos and we can watch them if you would like?"

"I would love that." He started to hand me back the photo album but I pushed it back to him. "I have multiple copies of everything, you keep these."

"Thank you." He started looking through again, taking in everything once more.

I walked out of Dean's "room" and down to the room Tiffany now claimed. I looked through her cracked door as she was packing

"Knock knock." I opened the door as she looked at me. "Mind if I come in?"

"Sure, come on." She had more clothes than any of us and nothing was proper hunting attire.

"You know if you are going to become a hunter, you have got to find some form on sensible foot wear." I grabbed one of the stilettos on the bed, knowing I would die if I wore a pair of these.

"I can't become a hunter. I'm not like y'all." She sighed and looked at me, worried.

"Well not with that attitude." I responded. "You've been in this life now, you can't walk away. With how many things out there that want to kill the Winchesters, you have to be."

"What's the point. Dean never loved me. Sam hates me and so do you. Why should I stay?"

"I don't hate you. Im sorry about Dean and Sam... that one you will have to figure out on your own." I sat down on her bed and leaned back.

"You busted my face two days ago."

"You ripped out my stitches."

"Sorry about that." She apologized.

"Sorry about everything else."

"It wasn't your fault. I was stupid. When I saw Dean in that bar, I made the first move. He pushed me away the first few tries, but after he got drunk, I took advantage of that. I fell for him and I tried to do everything I could to make him love me like he loved you. He talked about you in his sleep, sometimes he would moan your name during sex. I was just a rebound. Dean's not a bad guy. I didn't know the truth and I tried to feed on it so he wouldn't leave me. I was scared I was going to end up back in that town, with my alcoholic father and abusive ex-husband."

"I forgive you, a million times. You won't ever have to go back there. It will take some time, but having you around will be a good thing. You're going to be a great hunter. Also I know this really great guy that I think would be perfect for you."

"You guys rebound fast from relationships." She was laughing as she finished her packing.

"It's a hunter's thing. Hit it and quit it. But really, he's a great guy. We are going to meet up with him when we get to North Carolina in the next few days."

"What's his name?"

"Garth." I walked out of the room, leaving her to ponder about Garth. He was a good guy and he deserved a good girl.

I saw Sam in the hall, rolling his bags out by his door.

"I just hear you tell Tiffany about Garth?" He asked, laughing.

"Shut up, they would be good together." Sam just shook his head, thinking what we both were thinking.

"I overheard you and Dean..."

"And...."

"I think it's a great idea. Also I've missed the munchkins too. I have a bag of things I've been picking up for them over the past few months and I don't have anymore space."

"You are going to spoil them, Sam."

"Just wait till Dean starts." I rolled my eyes at the thought of Dean getting the girls a remote control car or a Swiss Army knife. "I think this is going to be good."

"Really?"

"Yes."

"But what do I say? Hey baby girls, meet your dad, it's really Uncle Dean?” I threw my arms up and leaned against the rotting wall.

"You'll figure it out, you always do." He walked back into his room and shut the door behind him.

I heard whispering from back down the hall. It was coming from Dean's room.

"I promise the moment I meet you two, I won't fuck that up. I promise to never leave you again. I'll teach you how to rebuild a car engine, we can play dress up, and braid Uncle Sam's hair while he sleeps. I'll be the best dad I can be. I'll protect you and love you no matter what."

He traced their faces with his finger. I knew Dean would make a good father. I find myself a decent mom. The problem is, how will we be good together and save the world at the same time?

Tags: @redlipstickandthewinchesters @charred-angelwings @mattory-reylo-shipper-offical @strawberryjuiceboxxx @keep-calm-and-omfg-jensen-ackles

#supernatural #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural one shot #dean winchester #dean x reader #dean x y/n #dean winchester fanfiction #Sam Winchester #sam winchester fanfiction

29 notes · View notes

alexknight002 · 7 years

Text

Pit Saves Canada - Chapter 2: Attack on Cananada

AN: Wow, I can't believe how many people have read the story already! Although I've only posted it a few days ago, it already has 7 reviews on fanfiction dot net! So thank you all of my readers. Unless you're Tim, then fuck you, Tim. This chapter will have some REAL ACTION and it will be so cool and edgy that you will literally have an orgasm.

Chapter 2: Attack on Cananada

"I can't believe I'm finally in the great white north! What a beautiful place!" Pit loves Canada, if you couldn't already tell. "I'm going to do EVERYTHING here in Ottawa!" The angle twins were in a gift shop in Ottawa because Pit wanted to buy 20 more sets of Canadian-themed clothes. Right now, Pit was still wearing his Mountie costume, and Pittoo was wearing a Kill la Kill shirt because even though it's anime, at least it's edgy anime.

"And I'm not going," said Pittoo, while looking up edgy anime memes on his phone.

"Yes you are! And you're going to love it! I made a list of everything that I'm going to do in Canada!" he said, taking out a Dictionary-sized notebook. "Number 1: Masturbate in a Tim Horton's bathroom!"

"Wtf why would you even say that?!" yelled Pittoo in horror.

"Haha I'm joking!" Pit luckily said. "You need to cheer up, Splatoon! Canada is a beautiful place! Just look outside! There's so much nature everywhere that wild animals are roaming the streets!" He pointed outside at the many moose, polar bears, and beavers running around and letting people pet them. "Look, a Chespin is coming into the store!"

A wild Chespin walked into the store and said "Chespin!"

"Wait..." said Pittoo. "Oh no! Oh no no no no! Don't you dare! I know what you're trying to do! Don't you fucking dare! I've seen enough of those shitty tumblr fanfic quotes to know what you're about to do SO STOP! I fucking swear, I will shoot you! I have this gun right in my hands, and I swear to Saitama I MEAN SATAN FUCK that you'll be dead if you do this. SO STOP IT RIGHT NOW YOU FUCKING FURRY BITCH!"

Chespin took a step out the door. "Chespou-"

*BANG*

Chespin fell down dead as Pittoo lowered his gun. He regretted nothing.

"WHAT THE HECK PITTOO YOU MURDERED HIM!"

"HEY, I WARNED HIM, AND HE STILL DID IT!"

Palutena, Icarus, and Bean walked up while all wrapped in a giant Canadian scarf.

"This is a group hug scarf," explained Palutena. "You go up to someone and then wrap them in this for a group hug! That way they can't get away!"

"Do you two want to join our group hug?" asked Icarus.

"Yeah!" yelled Pit.

"Fuck no!" yelled Pittoo.

They didn't listen to Dark Pit and wrapped them both in the scarf.

"AH GET ME OUT!" squealed Pittoo edgily. "HISS! HISS!"

"Hey, cashier, do you want to join in our group hug?" Palutena asked the girl working at the counter.

"Sure, eh!" she exclaimed happily and joined in.

"Everyone else in the store, you can join in, too!"

"Yay!" everyone yelled and then joined in the hug.

"WTF GET ME OUT OF HERE!" whined Pittoo.

"Canada!" said Pit because Canada.

LATER:

The angle family all got on a tour bus so that they could see all the great sights in Ottawa. They saw the Notre Dame Cathedral, the Parliament building, the National Gallery of Canada, and even the Canadian White House! Pit was screaming in happiness the entire time while Pittoo put on the same noise-cancelling headphones from earlier.

"I hope I can meet Trudeau! He is my true hero, and I want to take a picture with him and get his autograph and take another picture and get another autograph and then take another another picture and then-"

Suddenly, a GIANT ROBOT tore the roof off of the bus! "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!11111111111111111111111111111111111" screamed everyone.

The evul robot trapped Palutena, Icarus, and Bean in a glowing cage and then flew away before anyone could do anything.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO MOM AND DAD AND OTHER DAD!" yelled Pit and Pittoo.

"AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH WE'VE GOT TO DO SOMETHING!" screeched Pit.

"SHIT WHAT DO WE DO?!"

"I DON'T KNOW!" and then they both ran in circles screaming until they realized that there were robots everywhere.

A familiar voice rung from the robots. "People of Canada, you may now welcome your new leader, ME, DONALD TRUMP! I now have enough money that I bought the entire United States and am now their overlord. And with my new power, I have the authority (and money) to take over your country. Sit aside and let us take you over and harvest your country's resources. Also, if you're wondering about your shitty former leader, he have him in captivity. That is all for today. Goodbye, and enjoy your new lives in the United States of Trump."

"OH SHOOT TRUMP TOOK OVER CANADA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! THIS IS THE WORST DAY EVER FIRST OUR PARENTS WERE KIDNAPPED AND THEN CANADA WAS TAKEN OVER BY DONALD TRUMP!1111111 AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!11111111111111111111111"

Everyone ran in terror to the nearest Tim Hortons and barricaded themselves inside.

"Do you have any ideas of what to do now?" asked Pittoo.

"I know! I'LL CALL OVERWATCH!" Pit took out his phone and dialed a number. "Hello, is this Overwatch?

"No, thees is Tito Dick 'Dickman,' baby," Tito Dick replied.

"Oh, soory, wrong number," said Pit, hanging up. "I don't know Overwatch's number, and so I accidentally called Tito Dick."

"If you didn't know their number, then what did you type into the phone?"

"I don't know, I just typed in a random number and hoped it would be the right one."

"That makes literally no sense. And wait...OH FUCK YOU SAID DICK!"

"Wait, no! I WAS JUST SAYING HIS NAME I DIDN'T CURSE!"

"AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH MY EARS YOU CURSED AAHAHHAHHAHAAHAH!"

"I'M SO SOORY!" screamed Pit and then they both cried into each other's arms. "Oh yeah WE NEED TO SAVE TRUDEAU AND ALSO SAVE CANADA!"

"I have an idea! We can form a team to SAVE CANADA!"

"Did I hear someone wanting to form a team?" asked a voice in the distance. It was...Johnny Test?! "I can help with my AWESOME talking dog! We can do TOTALLY RADICAL things like rebelling from authority and riding on EPIC skateboards!" he yelled making whiplash noises and other sound effects everwhere.

"Never mind, Pittoo and I will go by ourselves."

"Yes, we must...GO ROUGE!" said the formerly satin-worshiping angle. "We just need to know where Trump took the Prime Minister!"

"Look, he posted something on Instagram!"

The angle opened an image of Trudeau taking a selfie while being escorted by guards. It was captioned, "Guys, I've been captured and taken to the Pentagon by Donald Trump!"

"That's it! We need to go to Washington D.C and save him!" exclaimed Pit. "And look, a ride is right there!" He pointed to a nearby moose. But it wasn't a regular moose. It was a radioactive moose that could travel at high speeds! The angle twins jumped onto its back and sped away.

They quickly got to the border, but faced trouble once they got there.

"Oh no!" exclaimed Pit. "Trump built a wall on the Canadian-American border! "Quick Pittoo, use your anime powers!"

"ONE PUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNCH!" screamed Pittoo as he punched a huge hole in Trump's wall.

Then things started going smoothly again. The moose was so fast that they got to D.C within 5 minutes.

"Look, it's the Pentagon!" pointed out Pittoo. They began to invade the Pentagon, Pittoo fighting with a katana and Pit using a hockey stick.

MEMEWHILE:

"So, Mr. Canada," said Trump trying to be tough. "Where do you have the weapons hidden."

"I don't know what you're talking about, eh?" Trudeau said with a poker face much better than Umi's in Love Live School Idol Project.

"I know you have Canadian super-weapons hidden in Ottawa, and I need to find them!"

Suddenly, an alarm went off. While Trump was distracted, Trudeau slugged him in the face and ran. "Soory aboot that, eh?" he said while running off. But he couldn't get too far before some evil agents like the ones in the Matrix came up and pointed guns at him. "You darn hosers!" exclaimed the Prime Minister.

Luckily, Pit got there just in time to knock the agents out with his hockey stick. "Justin Trudeau, IT'S REALLY YOU!" Pittoo soon got up behind them and sheathed his katana.

"Quick, we have to get out of here before Trump sends in reinforcements. I have a portal gun with me that can take me back to Ottawa, but it only works when powered by maple syrup!"

"Good thing I have some with me!" said Pit, taking out a jug. He poured the syrup into the portal gun, causing the portal to open up, and they hastily jumped through and appeared in Ottawa.

"CANADA, I MISSED YOU!" screamed Pit, kissing the ground.

"You were only gone for a fucking hour," complained Pittoo.

"Any time from Canada is a bad time, Pittoo."

"I agree," said Trudeau.

"OMGOSH I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S REALLY YOU! I'M YOUR BIGGEST FAN!"

"Why, thank you for saving me, eh! I am so gratified to the two of you! What are your names?"

"I'm Pit, and I love Canada more than anything! This is my edgy weeb brother Pittoo!"

"Konichiwa, I mean 'sup," Pittoo edged weebily.

"How would you two like to help me...SAVE CANADA!"

"OH MY MACDONALD, YES! I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR CANADA!"

Someone walked out of the nearby Tim Hortons, and it was Lucas from Pokemon Diamond and Pearl. "Look, Trudeau is safe!"

A group of Canadians walked in from fighting the robots with axes, hockey sticks, and shotguns. "Hoor-eh!" they exclaimed (AN: GEDDIT!).

All of the Canadians went into the restaurant with the angles and the PM and had a party.

"We're so glad you're safe, Mr. Prime Minister!" said a Canadian girl.

"Why, I couldn't have gotten out if it wasn't for these two angles!" he said, patting Pit and Pittoo on the back.

"OH MY GOSH TRUDEAU JUST TOUCHED ME!1" exclaimed Pit happily.

Suddenly, a man with a gun kicked down the door!

"Prime Minister Trudeau, I'm CIA!" he said, pointing a gun at him.

Then a bulky masketta man walked into the room! "I'm crashing this party...with no survivors!"

AN: GASP! Who is this mysterious masketta man? AND WILL THEY MAKE IT OUT ALIVE? Find out next time! I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter, and please tell me what you thought in the comments!

#pit #canada #kid icarus #super smash bros #fanfiction #crack fic #pittoo #dark pit #justin trudeau #donald trump #parody #crack #shitpost

2 notes · View notes

pcwpolwrestling · 6 years

Text

Shutdown Showdown-PCW Newsline

1/10/2019 PCW NEWSLINE

The Shutdown Continues

The Media Reacts

Kellyanne Conway and Jim Acosta Get Into It

PCW Heartland Rankings

This Week on PCW Extreme Political TV

CURRENT CHAMPIONS: Universal PCW Champion: ‘Red Solo Plastic Cup’ Ray McAvay (Independent/Les Miserables) Universal PCW Tag Team Champions: Sports Entertainment Corporation: P.M.C. Banks and Charlie Blackwell Universal PCW Women’s Champion: ‘Extreme Pizza Delivery Girl’ Tessa Martin (Independent) PCW Red Brand Champion: Kirk Walstreit- the Wall Street Market Analyst with the Man Crush on ESPN’s Kirk Herbstreit PCW Blue Brand Champion: Vacant PCW Red Brand Tag Team Champions: Banks and Blackwell PCW Blue Brand Tag Team Champions: Union Jack Taylor and the Ultimate Social Justice Warrior

===

LAST WEEK ON EXTREME POLITICAL TV: The shutdown continues. How is the media covering the shutdown?

Colleen Crowder: Our narrative is that the shutdown is all Donald Trump’s fault plus it’s wrong that PCW Heartland owner Dawn McGill gets to run her shows while the PCW Blue and PCW Red Brand shows…bigger shows…are forced to stay home.

PCW Heartland Owner Dawn McGill delivers a warning to the Establishment.

Dawn McGill: I said this on May 14th, 2017 and it holds true today. Paul Ryan or Kevin McCarthy whoever in charge there don’t get it. Mitch McConnell, Nancy Pelosi, and Chuck Schumer don’t get it. I still wonder sometimes if Donald Trump actually gets it. But let me make this clear to the Establishment…PCW is not here for you. PCW is not here for the Sports Entertainment Corporation and CSPN. PCW is not here for the American Patriots. PCW is not here for the Progressive Alliance. PCW is here for…YOU…the fans. We don’t need the American Patriots. We don’t need the Progressive Alliance. All we need to succeed is you…and your support.

Nancy Pelosi adjourns Executive Committee meeting early leaving American Patriots wondering what’s going on.

Pelosi moves to adjourn for the weekend. Steny Hoyer (MD-Progressive Alliance) seconds. The Progressive Alliance quickly stands and streams out the door as fast they can leaving a confused and bewildered American Patriot Leader Kevin McCarthy (CA-American Patriots) looking at the American Patriots in the room.

Kevin McCarthy: Hey! Where’d everyone go? Does anybody know what’s going on?

Elizabeth Warren has a beer at the show.

Back from the break, the camera pans up to where Elizabeth Warren (MA-Progressive Alliance) is sitting in the crowd. She’s having a beer and talking with the people surrounding her.

Colleen Crowder: All Elizabeth Warren is doing is trying to show that she’s an ordinary person…no different than anyone else.

Johnny Suave: Because most ordinary people pretend to be a member of a protected class in order to gain preferential treatment at one of the world’s most prestigious universities.

New Universal PCW Champion Ray McAvay speaks.

Ray McAvay: The wrestlers of the PCW Red and Blue Brands are sitting at home right now because the Progressive Alliance and the American Patriots can’t agree on anything. We are here in Topeka, Kansas this afternoon because we are here for you…my way is different from most professional wrestlers. I’m an average schmuck. I show up. Punch in. Shut up. And get to work.

Heartland Title Tournament Semi-Finals. -Jack Fraiser defeats Average Joe in the first semi-final. -’The One Man American A-List’ Stone Chism defeats SNAFU in the second semi-final

===

SHUTDOWN UPDATE An emergency meeting took place this past Tuesday night with the PCW Red and Blue Brand wrestlers, PCW CEO Donald Trump (NY-American Patriots), Nancy Pelosi (CA-Progressive Alliance) and Chuck Schumer (NY-Progressive Alliance).

Trump spoke first and once again urged the Executive Committee to agree to his security enhancements to make PCW show a safer place for the fans. Trump emphasized that he wanted to get the PCW Red and Blue Brands back to work. But as long as Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer refuse to even consider his plan, he will keep the shows shut down.

Next, Pelosi and Schumer spoke to the assembled wrestlers concerning the grave situation.

Pelosi went first. She grimly states Trump has chosen to hold the Red Brand and Blue Brand hostage until he gets his way. Pelosi agrees that we need to secure our shows. But she alleges Trump has manufactured a crisis and is hurting the families of the all the wrestlers who have been effectively locked out of their jobs.

Schumer, who appeared uber glum, wants to separate the shutdown of PCW shows from the arguments about security. We can secure our shows without building a literal wall between our fans and our wrestlers. Schumer also calls this a manufactured crisis and says let’s get the Blue and Red Brand shows going again and work this out.

How did it play out? Longtime Progressive Alliance adviser James Carville had this to say.

James Carville: I’ve been more excited about colonoscopies than he (Schumer) was giving his speech tonight. He didn’t want to be there.

A meeting was scheduled for Wednesday between Trump, Pelosi, and Schumer to continue to discuss the issue. Could both sides ratchet down the rhetoric and work together to find an end to the crisis?

VIDEO: Wednesday Meeting Between Trump, Pelosi, and Schumer

[Trump walks in and sits down across from Pelosi and Schumer.]

Donald Trump: What’s going to happen in thirty days if I reopen the Red and Blue Brand, will you agree to approve the improved security enhancements I’m proposing?

Nancy Pelosi: No.

Donald Trump: Okay.

[Trump stands back up and starts for the door.]

Chuck Schumer: Hey? Where are you going?

Donald Trump: I’m not wasting my time.

Chuck Schumer: You can’t leave!

Donald Trump: Didn’t Nancy Pelosi adjourn the Executive Committee early last week so the Progressive Alliance could leave instead of negotiating with the American Patriots?

Nancy Pelosi: That’s different.

[Trump exits.]

So apparently no.

The Guild of Low Level Media People Trying to Make a Name for Themselves had this to say:

‘Low Level Reporter at the New York Times Trying to Make a Name for Herself’ Colleen Crowder: Trump has fabricated this crisis. Again, this is why we need a new CEO.

‘Low Level Reporter at CNN Trying to Make a Name for Herself’ Sharon Johns: Donald Trump is being petulant. He's trumped up this 'crisis' and is keeping wrestlers from making a living. The Progressive Alliance is right to dig their heels and refuse to consider any other view other than theirs because their view is correct.

‘Low Level Reporter at the Washington Post Trying to Make a Name for Himself’ Dan Miller: Trump is wrong. He’s being a child. His argument has no merit and we agree with the Progressive Alliance over this manufactured crisis.

‘The Voice of PCW’ Johnny Suave had this to say.

Johnny Suave: So I guess the moral of this story it’s okay when it’s clear Nancy Pelosi has no intention to negotiate when she adjourns the Executive Committee last week so the Progressive Alliance can leave the American Patriots and go home for the weekend…but it’s not okay for Donald Trump to get up and leave when it’s clear Pelosi has no intention of negotiating.

Crowder, Miller, and Johns all begin to cough…

Colleen Crowder (coughing): …that’s different…

Dan Miller (also coughing): …whataboutism…

Sharon Johns (also also coughing): …false equivalency…

Colleen Crowder (coughing): …let’s move on…

Dan Miller (coughing): …move on…

Sharon Johns (coughing): …yes…move on…

===

CONWAY-ACOSTA SKIRMISH Trump aide Kellyanne Conway tangled with CNN’s Jim Acosta before the Tuesday meeting.

Jim Acosta: Kellyanne, can you promise the PCW CEO will tell the truth tonight?

Kellyanne Conway: Yes, Jim. Can you promise that you will? The whole truth and nothing but the truth, so help you God? Am I allowed to mention ‘God’ to you?

Acosta fired back that he doesn’t have an ‘alternative facts’ problem like she does.

Kellyanne Conway: Make sure that goes viral. This is why I’m one of the only people around here who gives you the time of day. You’re such a smartass most of the time and I know you want this to go viral.

Jim Acosta: Ma’am?

Kellyanne Conway: Don’t you ma’am me. Don’t you put it back in my face for all corrections your network needs to issue. I was on your network 25 or 26 times in 2018. I’m one of the last people here who even bothered to go on, and the disrespect you show to me personally, I’ll look past it. By the way, isn’t this you at a PCW House show this past weekend showing that security enhancements actually work?

VIDEO: Poplar Bluff, MO House Show

[A video appears. Acosta is standing in line to go to a PCW Heartland house show in Poplar Bluff, Missouri.]

Jim Acosta: There’s nothing here resembling an emergency situation.

[There’s extra security in place. There’s dividers in place that help separate people.]

Jim Acosta: There’s no people rushing to get into the building.

[The whole process is smooth and orderly.]

Red-faced, Acosta’s jaw drops. He turns and runs off.

===

PCW HEARTLAND RANKINGS

Heartland Title Champion: TBD #1 Contender: ‘The One Man Anti-Hollywood A-List’ Stone Chism/Jack Fraiser #2 Contender: SNAFU #3 Contender: Average Joe #4 Contender: Justin Beaver (SEC)

Heartland Tag Team Title Champion: Weapons of Mass Destruction: A. Tom Bomb and Hy Drogen Bomb #1 Contender: The Dork Dynasty: Leonard and Sheldon Robertson #2 Contender: Island of Misfit Wrestlers: Rah and Halitosis #3 Contender: The Beer Bellied Softball Playing Ninja: Hank and Tiny #4 Contender: The Green World Order: ‘Extreme Vegan’ Brock Cole Lee and GreenPete

===

THIS WEEK ON PCW EXTREME POLITICAL TV We will find out who the new Heartland Champion is going to be? Will it be the ‘One Man Anti-Hollywood A-List’ Stone Chism? Or will it be Jack Fraiser backed by his Oootlander Claire Rendell?

‘Mr. Hollywood’ Kevin Daniels is upset over the Les Miserables ‘intrusion’ of the Golden Globes earlier this week. Daniels plans to address the issue at Extreme Political TV.

PCW Heartland Owner Dawn McGill and Professor McCarthy of Berkeley, California meet…no, not in a ring but in Dawn’s office about the incident at Extreme Election Night 2018 where McGill threw McCarthy over the railing and through two tables below.

The SEC tries to explain the Clemson-Alabama game this past Monday night.

And the latest on the PCW Shutdown of the Red Brand and Blue Brand shows.

All this and more this Sunday night on Extreme Political TV.

0 notes

humanoid-lovers · 6 years

Photo

Hilarious I couldn't put this down. If you are offended by language, the title of the book should tell you what you're getting into, but this is some of the funniest stuff I've ever read. Justin Halpern is downright hilarious and has sarcasm and charisma oozing from his words as he retells more stories about his dad and his own life than I have in my entire family. It's almost hard to believe that it's all true, but I sorta hope it is, and he swears it is. I would randomly send quotes from this book to my friends and they'd laugh hard without even understanding where it came from. Once I explained where I got the quotes, they all went and read the book and all have said they've loved it (which is weird since my friends rarely read). Read the descriptions of the book and you get that on every. single. page. He makes fun of himself as much as he talks about his dad, and it's awesome. I can't recommend it enough! Go to Amazon

Hysterically funny, and... Even funnier if you know or knew someone like Dad. I had the luck to know a man like him; he was my best friend's father. He told you the truth in no uncertain terms, usually in language he learned in the Navy. I could hear Gene's voice throughout this book, and feel my heart swell up missing him. Justin Halpern's Dad is the most laugh-inducing, hard-swearing, truth-telling guy you'll ever laugh until you cry over. You might not approve of his language but you're going to appreciate his honesty, how he is there for his family, and his blunt way of telling you what he thinks of everything. I thoroughly enjoyed this book. Go to Amazon

Funny and very relatable Sh#t My Dad Says was a fairly quick enjoyable read. It was great getting to know the author and most importantly his father. Although what glares at you first is Mr. Halpem Sr and is his command of colorful language it is quick to see through to the man and his love for his son. I could relate to for Justin and being the youngest of much older siblings. You tend to be an afterthought of two tired parents. But they unbeknownst to you have you in their range. Their love hasn't diminished just their enthusiasm for raising kids. Funny and thoughtful at the time. I look forward to reading Justin's other book. Go to Amazon

A Fun, Fast Read Sh*t my Dad Says was so fun, I read this book in two days. Accessible, relatable, and absolutely hilarious, the book chronicles highlights from the author’s life though his father’s unusual, typically vulgar viewpoint. There are brief shorts and quippy vignettes, which makes this a great book to read during limited available reading periods. Well-written, poignant, and entertaining, there’s not much to say other than growing up with this dad must have been a riot. Go to Amazon

Sh*t My Dad Says Some how I happened to find Amazon's "Free Kindle for PC", curiosity got the best of me so I checked it out. I'm Soooo Happy I did!! There was a list of all kinds of books to choose from! Since I haven't read a book in I don't know how many years, I wanted to start out light and funny!! Let me tell you, after reading the first few pages of "Sh*t My Dad Says," I was hooked!!! This book provided me with a million laughs....I actually sat here reading and laughing out loud, (so hard at times) I almost wet my pants!!! Mr. Halpern wrote about the things his dad said to him as he was growing up and I could actually picture this little boy and his reactions!!! I think everyone can identify with Mr. Halpern, we've all been told things by our fathers. This book recaptures the relationship from child to adulthood and is Out of this World Funny!! I really Enjoyed the book and I fell in love with the author!!! I would Definitely Recommend "Sh*t My Dad Says" to Anyone who Wants or Needs to Laugh!!! Go to Amazon

Your Children Are Watching.......Right Or Wrong ? My 21yr. old daughter read this then lent it to me. It was a laugh a minute encyclopedia. If you are not close to your daughter or son, it will draw you closer because of all the "they say yes and we say no way" discussions that evolve. I would have loved to have had this book when my father was alive. Now that Bill Cosby has proven what a phony hypocrite he was as his book "Fatherhood" zoomed up the charts, and tried to make fatherhood more scientific than putting a man on the moon. Try something light, and laugh. After all "Perception Is Reality". This is a little gem of a good time, but you better have a sense of humor. It will also point out to you to be careful, '"Your Children Are Watching More Than You Think". Even when you think they must be zombies from video games, the internet, i-phones, etc. They might be wrong or right, but that is the question (with no affirmative answer) Go to Amazon

If you're looking for a good laugh this is the book I'm not gonna bore you with the long review. I will tell you this is one of the funniest books I've read in a long time. Dad proves to be a no nonsense kind of guy and has no qualms about telling his son when he screws up, and has an off-color way of telling him when he does something right. This is no Leave It to Beaver , and as you can guess by the title there are several of those seven words you're not supposed to say on TV in this book. You deserve a good laugh - indulge yourself ! Go to Amazon

A book Five Stars Funny, funny book Great Listen For a Semi-Long Drive You will recognize your Dad, Uncle, Grandpa, etc!! Lol This book is hilarious! Followed the author on Twitter ... Easy entertaining read Funny! Hilarious. I read this before, and got it ...

0 notes

michaelgcasey · 7 years

Text

K Pop saves the World

this had been on the front page of Seoul Times for a week now, this is surreal in nature perhaps the real pop stars actually did do a K Pop Saves the World Concert. But that’s just my 50 cents worth of opinion.

Michael Casey

As I flagged yesterday I’ll write something about Pop Stars today, I’ve even changed my usual Font. I did think of one thing and then another, then I had a splat idea. Its the Jackson Pollock school of writing after all, as we lie in our beds the Angel of Death approaches, and the Dove of Peace is just a tiny tiny mustard seed in comparison. I am talking of the looming nuclear war in North Korea.

Read these two links before I resume, with a fresh coffee in my hand.

http://www.msn.com/en-gb/news/world/north-korea-threatens-to-sink-japan-reduce-us-to-ashes-and-darkness/ar-AArUtCD?li=BBoPWjQ&ocid=mailsignout

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzJvBgsFjvQ&list=RDEzJvBgsFjvQ&t=4

The 1st is a worrying news item, the 2nd is K Pop.

I’m listening to REM as they sing “Everybody Hurts” I’ve chosen their Automatic for the People album as the backdrop while I talk to you all. Sorry Justin and your Beavers I’m not going to mock you, you do a good enough job on your own. And Snoop you walk your own dog, Eminem go back to school, but Justin dear Justin, I taught you everything you know, now its time to use your 20/20 Vision.

Instead I want to talk about Music, if it be the food of love play on. I wish I could lip sinc the entire film Moulin Rouge as I love it so much. My favorite scene is where the black guy punches the count and save Nicole Kidman. But I digress as ever, but I have such great legs so I should be in a dress. So today’s idea is K Pop for Peace.

23 million people in North Korea are being led by somebody who could be a fat rapper, who has spent everybody’s 50cents on Nuclear Bling, who could poison his own country’s water supply when the mountain where the testing is done collapses around him. In the South everybody has everything, they even have FOOD. So what are we to do to avoid the 1st Strike from USA, or a very close 2nd strike if the Panzi, which is a Chinese word for Fat or Pig, tries to get in first. The Logic Of Madness, this is actually a simple concept if you put yourself in the shoes of the madman. This is where the madman kills everything he loves, such as his own family, and then everybody just cannot understand why. Sadly we see such cases in the newspaper from time to time.

The Dear Leader loves nobody, he is corrupt and just loves his own position. So why will he listen to say a fat guy with silver hair in shades from Birmingham? He has not looked in the mirror and changed, he has not had a road to Damascus experience, he has no Soul. He hacked our NHS, it was only saved by a young guy who is now in Jail in USA for something, its due in court soon. A comedy about North Korea, not very funny in the artistic sense resulted in Sony being hacked. People forget Koreans are very clever, even if just in the Military sense in the North.

So what are we to do?

Pack up all your troubles in your all kit bag and sing, yes sing. All you Rappers and hard men out there, why not sing for Peace. I dare you to have a Dream, like King and yes like Abba. Pop stars always say in answer to what is their one dream, world peace, that was until one DJ punched the pop star, be realistic the interviewer shouted.

So Snoop follow your dog’s lead, 50 Cents lend us a penny, no not for a pee, just show us your sparkle, and all the rest of you out there in Hard Man Wrapper Land. Your time has come. Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country. And the answer is sing Take me Home Country Roads and all the John Denver hits. Yes, all you hard rappers out there, Sing Country. And may Buddy Rich rock and roll in his grave. As for all you gyrating girl singers there is room for you too, as I sit here talking to you Love Hurts plays again, so you Ladies can sing that and shake as only you can shake, while I finish my Lemonade.

Then here’s the clever bit track back from Sony to North Korea and let them hear the music. Let them have a Soul, let them dance. All of North Korea’s public address system is taken over by music. First the rappers singing country, they will be the storm troopers of love. Then Let the music sing let the music take over. Surround North Korea with K POP the only language they understand. From South Korea, from Japan and from China too, not forgetting a few Russians.

Constant K pop, the music of fun and laughter and very pretty girls, not forgetting Gangham Style. Broadcast at them on every radio frequency, on every IP address, take over the North Korean nuclear program with K Pop Music, and not forgetting Abba. The Dear Leader presses a button and all he gets is every tv and computer coming to life with K Pop, and then the population have something to really cry about.

Cry with happiness because K-Pop has saved them from the starvation of the spirit. This should be a cue for a Rapper to sing something good, but are any of you good enough? I’ll have a sip of lemonade while you reach for your dictionary. But I’m sure King would know what to say. Or do we just ask the King, Elvis to say a word now. Yes maybe Mr Gangham Style himself should start singing in the Ghetto. North Korea needs to leave the Ghetto and enter the sunshine. Sing Rappers sing, Take me Home Country Roads, in Korean.

0 notes

ohioguru03 · 7 years

Text

Has it been 20 years?...

It seems like yesterday we were riding a chartered bus to Bill Davis Field on the campus of the The Ohio State University listening to “I’ll be Missing You” by Puff Daddy, Faith Evans, and 112.

I’m referring to our (St. Clairsville Baseball) unforgettable run to the Division II State Baseball Final Four. It was all so surreal and it was hard to fully realize what was happening in the midst of the trek to Columbus.

I was just a sophomore, but played quite a bit on a team that was a perfect mix of talent and grinders. I was mainly used on the mound, and finished the season with a (2-0) record, which included getting the win over Bellaire St. John’s (a regional participant). The win over the Irish broke the school-record for most wins in a season at 24. We would eventually finish the year (26-4).

Other than being an all-star in pre-game infield practice that is about where my part of the story ends. Well, I almost forgot, there was the heckling that the sophomores would do to the opponents. Ironically, we were numbers 26, 27, 28, and 29. We thought we were pretty funny and a big part our success. Basically, we were loud mouthed jerks, but effective.

We started the season with a victory, but lost our home opener to Martins Ferry (6-5). The crazy thing, we had our ace on the mound (Shane Valigora) and dropped a game to a team far less talented than us. Valigora would go on to win an incredible 10 games on the season and single handily pitch us to the Final Four. He earned the nickname “horse” for a reason. He had a high 80′s fastball and a nasty curve ball. He was as mentally tough as any pitcher I’ve been around.

Following the loss to Martins Ferry, we went on a long winning streak. I can only speak for me personally, a pretty knowledgeable sports guy, but it never even crossed my mind that this team could accomplish some of things we did. It wasn’t like we were expecting to make a big run.

During the winning streak, it just seemed like everything went our way. Even in games we got behind, we found ways to comeback no matter what inning it was. After awhile, we started developing the attitude that we can’t lose. It didn’t matter what the situation, we were going to find a way to win. Games with Union Local and Alliance stick out to me where this was the case.

We finally dropped a game to Zanesville where we rested a lot of starters. We quickly bounced back and got rolling once again. Then, it happened! We were playing in the OVAC Championship Game at Steubenville’s Vaccaro Field against a game Barnesville squad.

See, for many, many years, this game was treated as a state championship game for legendary coach Richard “Lefty” Hall. He was often accused of caring more about the OVAC Tournament than the State Tournament. Only he could answer that, but he must of had a feeling this was his best chance to reach Columbus before he retired a few years later.

He didn’t start Valigora in the OVAC Title Game, but instead opted for our number two man Brian “Bucky” Richardson. The game was a laugher as we quickly jumped out to a (19-1) lead. We were literally laughing in the dugout thinking this was going to be over in five innings and we could put another trophy in the case en route to Columbus.

I remember the great Barnesville coach Brad Wilson (a great friend of Lefty) saying hey “a couple hits we’re right back in this.” I remember thinking is this guy nuts. The Rocks are going to be fortunate to hold us under 30 runs in this game. However, he was right, one hit led to another and one error led to another, and Barnesville was inching closer.

Richardson was pulled for yours truly. I came in and quickly got a double play ball, but the late Derek Hoffman fielded a grounder at first and threw the ball into center field trying to get the force out at second base. The 6-foot-7 lefty was as good as they get at first base, which made it even harder to believe.

I was then pulled and quite frankly I don’t remember who came in next, but I do recall Valigora dropping a pee wee league pop up at third base. Yes, another strange happening. Eventually, Richardson reentered on the mound, which I didn’t even know you could do that. It was absolutely crazy. Long story, short, Barnesville eventually won the game (this is exactly what we needed to cool our ego), and to Hall’s credit, he never brought Valigora in the game.

The tournament would start and we barely escaped the opener against Beaver Local. The Beavers hurled a very good pitcher, and we used a generous bounce to win a close one. Game two was a blowout of Indian Creek before playing River View at its field in the district.

Josh Bowman, who was a stud left-hander, couldn’t find the plate walking several of our hitters. The game ended up in another lop-sided victory.

Regional play would take place at Ohio University Lancaster’s Beaver Field. We played Logan Elm and pitcher Wayne Rossiter in the semis. It wasn’t easy, but we eventually pulled away for an (8-3) win.

We were scheduled to play Richmond Edison the next day, but after driving back to Lancaster, the game never started as rain washed out the contest. The regional final would move to Vaccaro Field in Steubenville on Monday evening.

It was the largest high school baseball crowd I’ve seen. Onlookers were standing on picnic tables to get a glimpse of a classic. Edison, a heavy favorite with Valigora not expected to pitch, jumped on us early with a grand slam by Nate Cline off Richardson. We would eventually claw our way back and take the lead. Enter Valigora! Edison would also bring in their ace (Rusty Bendle). To this day, I’ve not seen or been part of a better game. The Red Devils eventually triumphed, 6-5, sending Hall and our team to its first state baseball Final Four.

The feeling can’t be described. It was like a fog. The hair on the back of my neck was standing up and it was like everything was happening in slow motion as our team was storming the field. I remember assistant coach Bobby Vincenzo parading his son (our batboy) around his on his shoulders. I will never forget the moment.

The state semifinal didn’t go the way we would’ve liked, but Valigora once again was stellar on the hill. We dropped a tough (3-0) decision to a very good Canton Central Catholic team led by lights out lefty Josh Haupt. We fought and battled like we did all year, but just couldn’t get to the big fella.

Random Thoughts:

-It was the best “team” I’ve been apart of. It was a true team with a couple studs in Valigora and Richardson. The latter being the best all around baseball player I had the privilege to play alongside. He could do it all.

-This team just didn’t make errors, which was a big reason for our success. The infield was flawless with Richardson at SS and sure-handed Ryan Mellott at 2B. Matt Banal was as tough as they come at 3B and Hoffman was automatic at !B (other than his heave into CF when I was pitching, lol). Nate King was our catcher, though he rarely threw runners out, he was a wall behind the dish.

-The outfield was serviceable with Craig Lipniskis in RF, who could really hit the ball out of the cleanup spot. Justin “Buba” Rector was everywhere in CF. Rector, an incredible musician, covered so much ground in the outfield. He was a great bunter and saved us on the mound many times. The right fielder was one of my best friends, Matt Lucki, the only sophomore starter was playing out of position but he managed quite nicely. Lucki, who eventually played for Youngstown State, was a streaky hitter that could swing for power.

-I vividly remember the leadership shown by the three seniors on this team. They led by example and kept all of us in line.

-It was a joke that none of our guys made all-state.

-It’s crazy to think this was 20 years ago. I’m really surprised St. Clairsville didn’t honor our team this past spring, but maybe 25 years?

-I enjoyed spending time with our bench crew, which featured Danny Olinski, who played a lot more than the rest of us, Justin Clifford (led Harrison Central to the state baseball Final Four in 2013 and is the head basketball coach), Matt Turkoly, and David Pugh. We sure did have a lot of laughs usually at the expense of the other team and ourselves.

-I honestly don’t know where some of these guys currently reside, but I would want them to know, it was an honor and a pleasure to be a small part of what was an amazing ride. It was the crowning moment of my athletic career and I will never forget it. There is just something special about being part of a team and trust me, this was a selfless club.

-Thinking about this happening 20 years ago makes me realize how short and precious life is. It’s such a gift by God! It makes me realize how fast time evaporates. We are constantly anticipating things in our life, and before we know it 20 years have gone by.

This reminds me of James 4:14, which says “...Your life is like the morning fog—it’s here a little while, then it’s gone.”

1 note · View note

blograzorwit · 7 years

Text

Jest A Minute from Subroto Mukherjee

Comic Relief-------------------- On a recent flight, a top TV comedian and a companion comedian got into such a rowdy row, the flight crew all but told these two OUT-STANDING comedians to go STAND OUT -- step out of the aircraft and not disturb the other passengers. Sure, these two stand-out comics provide plenty of COMIC RELIEF on prime time TV. But -- phew! -- it sure was a RELIEF to the passengers when these two quarreling COMICS finally shut up! *** Hogwarts or Hogwash?------------------------------------ Prashant Kishore, the poll wizard, had promised the Congress that he'd chant his abracadabra, wave his magic wand, perform his magic and pull at least 220 seats out of the top hat for the party in the UP polls. Ha, the claims of this wizard (who is straight from the Hogwarts School of Magic ) proved to be a load of hogwash! But hey, have no fears. This wizard has now pulled off one magic trick with great success -- the disappearing act! No one can find him anywhere. He has vanished without a trace. Not that you can blame him for that. After all, Congress party men are hunting high and low for him, armed with hockey sticks! *** Dis-Concerting----------------------- The bright-eyed, bushy-tailed eager beaver, Justin Bieber, is coming to town to perform a concert. Well, given his kind of music, that's disconcerting. This toy-boy pop star might not have broken a new ground in music, though he might have broken some ear drums. And he might not have given a new direction to music but hey, we still welcome him for bringing his music in our direction. Here in Mumbai, starlet Jacqueline Fernandes will play the host to the Canadian teen sensatiom. She will escort him, play the tour guide, take him around town to the RIGHT PLACES and show him the RIGHT THINGS. And who better to do that than this starlet who has the all the RIGHT THINGS in the RIGHT PLACES! *** Late Realization------------------------ Why did ex-CM Akhilesh lose? Due to late realization. Poor Akhilesh gave away lakhs of laptops to students, only to realize -- TOO LATE -- that those students had not yet reached the voting age and could not vote for him. *** And in the UP polls, Rahul-ji showed that he was born to politics and when it came to contesting elections, he was a natural. A natural disaster! *** Romeo, Romeo, Where Art Thou?------------------------------------------------- Way to go, Mr New UP CM Yogi Adityanath! No sooner did he assume the CM's chair than he began cracking the whip. Renewing efforts to clean up the state. Banning tobacco, paan, gutka and vices galore! Shutting down illegal abattoirs. And cracking down on road-side 'Romeos'. So girls are happy. Their parents are happy. Everyone is happy. Everyone, that is, except Shakespeare. The Bard must be turning in his grave and muttering in his beard, ruing the injustice of how we in India have reduced his noble lover-boy Romeo to a common, street-side eve-teaser! So, Romeo, Romeo, where art thou? Well, in UP at least, the cops of anti-Romeo squads have driven poor Romeo into hiding in the loo! *** Indecent?------------------ I watched a bit of the new film on the renowned writer Saadat Hasan Manto. Did you know that Manto spoke 4 languages? Hindi, Urdu, English -- and profanity! *** Govinda's Run Away Hit----------------------------------- Govinda's new film has proved that he can still do anything with his feet -- dance any step. But then so can his audience. They too can do anything with their feet -- like using it to run away! You see Govinda's new film and you say -- yes, that's the way to make a film! But then you see the cinema audience and you say -- hey, where are you all rushing? That's the way to the exits! *** Firecracker!-------------------- Bipasha Basu might have nothing going for her anymore, no films, no work, no assignments worth mentioning. To all intents and purposes, her career has bombed. Heck, even the dude she has married is a dud, nothing to make a song and dance about. But hey, hold it. Bips is still Bips, OK? She is still a firecracker! You don't believe me? Here, try this. Just whisper the two words 'John Abraham' in her ear -- and see the way she explodes like a Diwali bomb! *** Exterminator---------------------- Arnold Schwarzenegger say he will not do any more Terminator movies. How disappointing for us die-hard fans. So what will he do? Sit at home and play the Exterminator -- swatting flies? *** Fairy-Tale Come True---------------------------------- Recently Dipa Karmakar got to meet her idol, the person she hero-worships -- Nadia Comaneci!A dream come true for our Dipa. Come to think of it, Dipa's life has been like a fairy-tale, in fact, the Cinderella fairy-tale. The only difference is this. Cinderella's pumpkin turned into a coach at midnight. But in Dipa's case, there was no pumpkin but she did have a coach -- a gymnastic coach Bisheswar Nandi -- who managed to send her to the Olympics. ***

0 notes