#you can tell that I stick around a certain type of ask blogs

[anon-l-76]

Sigh...

So the fabric of space time is irreversibly fucked...

Here's a list of every person that I know has at least one duplicate

Kanako

Chujin (one is from an alternate universe)

Martlet

AXIS

Ceroba (one of them is from underfell)

Clover

And that's all that I can remember currently

- L

[strang3lov3]

Holy fuck! Not one, but TWO milestones to celebrate!

Sometime in April I hit 5000 followers and I was gonna celebrate then, but with my one year fic anniversary gbu899i (< my cat Gizmo typed this, we're leaving it here. Everyone wave to him) and mostly because the end of the semester right around the corner, I decided to wait until May in order to give this the attention it deserves. Here we are! May 10th marks one year of me writing fic here on tumblr, and I want to celebrate both achievements.

Your support has played such a vital role in making writing such a gratifying hobby of mine. Whether you’ve been here since I started writing a year ago or just recently stumbled across my blog, it means the world to me. Having people read, like, reblog, comment, and engage with my fics is beyond fucking incredible. You keep me inspired to keep writing.

It’s not easy for me to stick to a hobby for a year. Ask the 20% finished afgan I started knitting two years ago that hasn’t been touched in months!! It’s beyond cool to have both a date on the calendar and such a pretty number to reflect how hard I’ve worked, and neither the date nor the number would be possible without you. Thank you 🩷

So we’re gonna celebrate. I haven’t done one of these before, unless you count the time I hit 2000 followers and said “send me requests!” and then did just one of them and zero others because I was so overwhelmed. So we’re taking a slightly different approach this time…

I’m thinking an extended sleepover, lol. Depending on how many participate, for a week or so you can send me asks from the prompts below and we’ll have some fun with them.

@noxturnalpascal and @beefrobeefcal heavily inspired these choices with their recent follower celebrations 🩵

🐈‍⬛ Show and tell - send me pics of your pets, or Pedro if you don’t have any pets, brownie points for Kieran Culkin pics, or anything else that you love. And tell me all about it, and I’ll show you something I love! 👯‍♀️ I want to get to know each other better, so tell something about yourself or ask something about me. If you want, you can use this and this (⬅️ two send an emoji posts) for prompts 🏞️ Request a Moodboard (my favorite) I love doing moodboards, just tell me what you wanna see and I’ll do my best. 🗳️Send me a poll that you wanna see! Ask any question, let us all decide the answer. 🍆 Send me your dirty horny old man headcanons. I’m a horndog for some old men and I can’t change who I am. 📖 Send me your own writing (or another’s work that you love) I actually have a summer reading project where I’ve tagged each and every one of my mutuals to send me their own works for me to read all summer. So consider this just an extension of that- please send me the links to works you’ve written and/or works you’ve read and enjoyed so that I can enjoy them too and support fellow writers ✍️ 🩷 I enjoy just about anything, but I have a soft spot for dark/dub-con, masturbation, uhhhh anything hot and dirty like that. 👩‍💻Request some writing. I can do Joel, Roman Roy, and I’m maaaybe feeling brave about Frankie. @beefrobeefcal has dibs on my first Frankie fic anyway. Horny and debauched thots encouraged, dare I suggest dark as well? Fluff too, though I think I suck balls at writing it. I’ve been told I should do drabbles,,, that’s not really how I roll with my writing but I’m willing to try. It’s entirely possible and actually likely you’ll get a full length fic, in which case, it’ll take some time to get those done so bear with me. Depending on how many requests for writing I get, I may cut off requests at a certain point too. *It’s also possible I won’t jive with your idea, in which case please don’t feel bad. I only want to write something I feel I can do well, and if I can’t, that’s not on you.

GOD I am a rambler. I could have said so much less. But I hope to hear from some of you all and have some fun! Love you love you love you.

Tagging some friends, readers, and mutuals who’ve made writing what it is for me 🩷 I love you all @ievutebebe @pinkypromisepascal @yazsos @heartfairy @magpiepills @medellintangerine @merz-8 @bitchesuntitled @theweedisasterxoxo @covetyou @theywhowriteandknowthings @futuraa-free @smok3r7 @toxicanonymity @atticrissfinch @xdaddysprincessxx @whatsnewalycat @addictedtotlou @littlevenicebitch69 @marisferasiop @joelsgreys @just-some-random-blogger @ghostlovesbaguettes @sweetenerobert @swiftiegirliepop @joeloverture @dorims @munsonhoneybaby @umnitsa @nostalxgic @yazsos @rainbowcosmicchaos @rav3n-pascal22 @604to647 @starry-eyes-love @paleidiot @bluecookies-and-ink @beardedjoel @aestheticisinq @corazondebeskar @axshadows @kyloispunk @survivingandenduring @pedroswife69 @bean-is-reading @pedroshotwifey @casa-boiardi @knittingandfanfics @molt3ngold @worhols @iknowisoundcrazy @nostalxgic @pattwtf @cerridwen007 @corozondebeskar @blackmetalamazon @jazzysnazzys @sheepdogchick3 @alltheseperfectimperfections @mermaidgirl30

[byunejoo]

BYUNEJOO ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY 𐦍

i can’t believe it’s been one whole year since i’ve been posting here! i won’t get emotional, but i just want you all to know that i am so grateful for you. each and every one of you. writing has been a joy of mine for many years now, and i don’t think i’ve stayed in a fandom writing space as long as i’ve stayed in lunéblr. i know that i don’t post as often as some people, or even as much as i would like, but i’d like to thank you all for sticking with me this past year.

now, on to the main point of the post. the byunejoo one year anniversary event. i have cleared my inbox (don’t worry, i saved all of your asks!) to open them up again for business (and don’t worry, i will write them this time). read below for more information.

rules 𐦍

choose one or two prompts from the list provided below, one or two tropes & aus, also provided below, and one member from the legal line. that is k to jo on my blog.

do not send anything for anyone in maknae line. you will be blocked.

i do write dark content, however i will not write age play, abuse, scat, vomit, race play, master/slave, or excessive physical descriptions (no hair color, eye color, skin color, body type, etc.)

please specify whether you’d like the member to be a dom, sub or a switch.

please be patient and please do not spam my ask box for your request.

please send only one request per ask. i only accept requests through asks. please don’t comment them or send them through dms.

do not kink shame, i will not tolerate that. if certain aus or prompts aren’t your taste, that’s fine, you don’t have to request them or read them. all prompts will have warnings in place to read before the drabble.

prompts 𐦍

please only choose one or two prompts below. inspired by @melobin’s 2k prompt event.

mark me. make me yours.

you can't expect me to do all the work. i want to see what that pretty mouth of yours can do.

please. make me feel good. no one else can like you.

you keep your hands where they are or i'll tie them up.

i'm waiting for your permission to let me have my way with you.

i'm simply enjoying the view. it's not every day i get to fuck someone so pretty.

i can’t pull out when you wrap your legs around me like that.

i don't care if someone sees us. i need you, now.

let me come in you, please. i want to fill you up.

that really does make you hard. i can feel you pulsing inside me.

i'm sorry, what was that? i can’t hear you over all that noise you’re making.

begging is a good look for you.

you taste like heaven.

you're fucking gorgeous like that, spread out like a good boy / girl who just wants to be eaten.

let me stay like this in you for a little bit.

look at that pretty expression. i always knew you could make one.

no need to rush—we have all night.

is that how you usually get out of these situations? by fucking your way out of them?

i love that no one else has seen you like this, that no one else has felt you before, been inside you. they don't get to have you, but i do.

i want you to teach me how to make you feel good.

i’m feeling greedy.

you talk too much. how about we use your mouth for something else?

could you be any wetter/harder?

i’m gonna fuck you so good you forget all about that bastard.

go and lock the door for me. i don’t want anyone to walk in while i’m balls deep/you’re balls deep.

i never knew you liked being spanked.

don’t stop. even if i beg you to.

your boyfriend/girlfriend/partner doesn’t need to know about this.

i want to make this perfect for you.

oh, you’re not wearing any underwear. trying to tell me something?

are you gonna keep playing with it or are you gonna put it in your mouth at some point?

do you trust me?

show me how you do it when you touch yourself.

am i going too fast?

let’s find out what you like together, alright?

i promise i won’t hurt you.

i want to fuck every last thought out of that pretty little head of yours.

i can’t wait to take your innocence.

just the tip, i promise.

friends don't fuck.

need to fuck a baby into you.

want him to join us, baby? ( please specify who the second member is )

i wanted you to be my first…

i missed this pussy/cock.

i know we agreed we wouldn't do this again but please, i need you so bad.

i don’t want you like a best friend.

i wanna fuck you in front of a mirror so you can see how good you take it.

i’ll be a good girl/boy! i'll be good for you!

i wanna fuck you slow with the lights on.

don't be so gentle with me. i don't break that easy.

i cleaned the kitchen today so i’d have room to fuck you on the table/counter.

use the new toy i bought you. let me watch.

i got reasons why i’m gonna love you better than your man right now.

i’m gonna suck on your cock/pussy until you’re trembling.

let me show you who the boss is.

i know it hurts, but be a good girl/boy and take it.

i just broke up with my ex.

i didn't know somebody could cum that fast just from a few fingers.

you call me late at night when i’m not the one you want.

that's right, baby. say my name. let everyone know who this pussy/cock belongs to.

tropes & aus 𐦍

please only choose one or two tropes & aus below. please specify who is which role.

academic/university

arranged marriage

babysitter/nanny

best friends sibling

best friends parent/parents best friend (aged up)

billionaire

bodyguard

brother's best friend

camgirl/camboy

camp counselors

childhood friends

enemies to lovers

exes

fake relationship

friends with benefits

enemy/frenemy with benefits

hunter/prey

hybrids

infidelity

maid/butler

model

monster

neighbour

office/coworker

omegaverse

rivals to lovers

rockstar/idol

roommate

royalty

sex worker

single parent

stepcest

street racer

sugar daddy

tattoo artist

teacher/professor/tutor

vampire/werewolf

vacation/staycation

wedding planner

yandere

example prompt “may i request prompts 29 and 17 with trope 2 for euijoo? virgin!reader and no power play, please”

all credits for prompts go to nightprompts, thelonelyempath, sxcret-garden-archive, delusionisaplace, of course melobin, and a few song lyrics.

[runnning-outof-time]

K’s 3K Follower Celebration

~ Tales From the Flower Garden ~

Thank you SO MUCH for helping this blog reach 3,000 followers!!! I know I say it in every post like this that I make, but the fact that this many people have decided to follow me blows my mind.

This was a long time coming (thanks to the…certain type of blogs that kept invading my follower list) so I figured that we’d celebrate!!

And then I thought what a better theme to choose than ‘tales from the flower garden’ … because I’m sure we all know the saying ‘April showers bring May flowers’…even though it’s still raining where I’m from.

SO…if you’re a writer (or a creator in general) and you’re interesting in joining in on this celebration, there are more details below the cut for you!!

If you’re not a writer, I still suggest you stick around because I’ve got a feeling there’s going to be many, beautiful and floral themed fics blooming shortly! — You can read the stories HERE.

So you’re a writer!!! …or maybe you’re just interested in what’s going on...

Either way, thanks so much for showing interest!! I hope you’ll find this writing event to be one that you can join in on. Remember, you don’t need to be a mutual or following me to join, this is open to EVERYONE!!

Here are some guidelines, if you’d like to take part:

You can write either an ‘x reader’ story or for an OC that you have…or even a ship from the show.

You can also write a platonic!reader or a sister!reader if those types of scenarios are more your speed/interest of writing.

You can include nsfw themes in your story - just please mark them properly (and be over 18 yourself) … same goes for dark fics - you can include those themes but please use warnings!

This is only for Peaky characters - you can choose any character from the show you’d like.

Please use a keep reading/read more line if your story is MORE THAN 1K words!! — I can help you add it if you’re unsure of how to.

There is no time limit/deadline for you to post your creations!

Make sure you TAG ME in your story so I can find it!

Here’s how you can join in:

Send a message/ask to me with the details below:

Choose a prompt from the list at the bottom of this post — only one person per prompt (I will allow prompts to be used twice if it happens to be open when you send a message - i.e I don’t check my messages fast enough and two people ask for the same prompt)

Choose which character you’re going to write it with — you don’t need to include it if you’re unsure of who you want to write it with…just tell me you’re unsure.

REMEMBER: ALL stories need to include a flower garden in some aspect — it can be the main setting or just one of the settings!

If you’re still interested in joining in after reading all of the guidelines…here are the prompts you can choose from (I just had to put a few lyric-based prompts in there - I’ve included the song, but you don’t need to base your story off of it):

*prompts can only be used once*

Angst

“You deserve better.”

“I don’t know how we can get past this.”

“Just don’t talk to me like that, ok?”

“Are you hearing what you’re saying right now?”

“You really don’t understand why I’m doing this, do you?” w/ Tommy

“Do you feel better about yourself now?”

“You can be so inconsiderate sometimes.”

“People ruin people, I don’t want to ruin you.” (from From Austin by Zach Bryan) w/Tommy

“You thought I was a savable man.” (from Taker by Brother Elsey) w/ Arthur

“You’ve now created the things that’ll haunt you the most.” (from Graceland by Allan Rayman) w/ Tommy

“Do you miss me?” (from Too Bad by Rival Sons) w/ Tommy

“I can’t help you if this is not enough.” (from Pink Motel by The Glorious Sons)

Fluff

“I can’t imagine going another day without you.”

“You can’t leave without giving me a kiss.” w/ Tommy

“You’re bushing, aren’t you?”

“You’ve just made me the happiest person alive.”

“Did I just make you smile?” w/ Tommy

“There was no reason behind that…I just wanted to kiss you.” w/Tommy

“You’re the only one who makes me feel like this, darling.” w/ Tommy

“Isn’t it beautiful out here?” w/ Tommy

Concern

“Let me see…please.”

“What’s happened to you?” w/ Polly

“Promise you’ll come back to me.”

“I won’t let anyone hurt you.”

“Please, just tell me what you’re going through…I can help you.”

“Come inside.” w/Tommy

“It’s freezing out here!”

“Please don’t touch that flower!” or “You can’t be out here touching these flowers!” w/ Alfie

Misc. (Pick a Path) - choose fluff, angst, etc.

“We can’t keep meeting each other like this.” w/ Tommy

“We’ll get through this together.”

“Would you stop looking at me like that?” w/ Tommy

“If only you knew the reason behind all of this.”

“I can’t believe you just said that.” w/ Alfie

“I…I didn’t think I’d see you here.” or “I just didn’t think I’d see you here.”

“I don’t even know what we are anymore.”

“Is there any reason why you’ve been out here all night?” w/ Tommy

“How did I know you’d be out here?”

“I’ve been waiting here all night for you.”

“Kiss me, please.”

“It’s going to be ok. I promise.”

“You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me.” w/ Tommy

“I don’t know if I can say goodbye.” w/ Tommy

“Are you sure we can do that/this out here?” w/Alfie

“I really don’t think we should be out here right now.”

“It’s always do as I say, never do as I asked you.”

“You don’t understand the kind of love you’re getting yourself in.” (from Taker by Brother Elsey) w/Arthur

“We said we’d never let each other go.” (from End of Forever by Rival Sons)

“I don’t mind what you have to do…I won’t think less of you.” (from I Want More by KALEO) w/ Arthur

“Forgive me for everything I did.” (from So Much Love To Give by The Glorious Sons) w/ Tommy

“No matter what I say or do I cannot prove that this isn’t the first time.” (from Chief by Allan Rayman)

Once again, send me an ask/message with the prompt you’d like to use as well as the character(s) you’re going to write it with (if you know who).

YOU DON’T NEED TO BE FOLLOWING ME TO JOIN! — EVERYONE’S WELCOME!!

I look forward to seeing your lovely creations!!

Tagging some people who may be interested/have been SUPER kind and supportive to me: @there-goes-thefighter @zablife @cillmequick @notyour-valentine @raincoffeeandfandoms @toms-cherry-trees @acewritesfics @look-at-the-soul @gypsy-girl-08 @l1-l4 @padfootdaredmetoo @evita-shelby @peakyscillian @thomasshelbydrabbles @noforkingclue @theshelbyclan @mgcldydrms @areyenotfondofmelobster @holacia3 @rangerelik @midnightswithdearkatytspb @little-diable @daisyblinder @theshelbyslimited @peakyltd @peacexatxlast @fallatyourfeet @dearshelby @shelbydelrey @peakyswritings @midnightmagpiemama @dandelionprints @moral-terpitude @cillixn @shelbyssins @creativepawsworld @peakypolly @pherelesytsia @anotherblinder @scorpiussage @call-sign-shark @anonymooseforever007 @sneakyblinders @mythos-writes @shelby-fangirl00 @huntingingoodwill @teenwolf-theoriginals @forgottenpeakywriter (I’m sorry if I’ve forgotten anyone — please know that you are SO special to me!! ❤️)

[wonryllis]

ADVICE ON HOW TO START A BLOG(WRITING).

it was asked by someone but i accidentally sent it through private answer ㅠㅠ so i'll be listing out the points again (more detailed) in this post plus additional points for anyone who might need it! (for a writing blog) find more tips here in my NAVI. if anyone has any other point, please feel free to add we're all here to help!

( 001. ) first step is to decide what kind of content you want your blog to be centered around. drabbles? oneshots? reactions? texts? smaus? series? of course you don't have to stick to one, you can write all, but the point is which one do you want to start your blog with and which one you want to build your blog with?

for me personally i chose to build my blog through reactions and then when i felt i had built a good enough base and an audience, i started branching out into the other types. this might not be the way everyone wants to follow but trust me it helps build a name well. they would recognize you for the kind of content you write and then your audience (people who like what you are writing) will find you!

for requests, i would suggest not to ask for them until a certain time. wait until you are settled into your blog and are comfortable with things and have at least a couple of works posted so that people know what they should be expecting when they ask for something.

it is also COMPLETELY FINE not to take requests like ever because it is your blog and you are providing content for free so no one has the right to tell you what to do. do not ever feel guilty for not giving in to people's demands if it's not what you want. if anyone and i mean anyone tells you otherwise, demands or harasses you regarding posting more or posting something they want or posting less or literally anything that they do not contribute to, block them. they do not deserve to have access to your free content with such entitlement.

( 002. ) pick out a username you want to be known by, and make a navigation post with all the links: your about me, rules, masterlist and so on.

in the about me page, let people know your age (you can write adult/minor as well) your alias (the name you want to be known by- it's different from username like for example my username is 'wonryllis' and my alias is 'yeonie' ) and anything you'd want people to know about you.

in the rules page, let people know what you are and are not comfortable with. what kind of people are not allowed to interact with your content including age restrictions (for eg mine is -15/30+), what kind of content you are open to writing and what kind of content you will absolutely not write, any rules you have regarding sending requests and asks, whether your requests are currently open, what would one have to do to be in your permanent/specific fic taglist and so on. you can look through the rules page of other blogs and find what you want to include.

for a masterlist, my advice will be to make one as soon as you have at least three works posted. when you have all your works in one place people find it easier to look through your blog and hence support you.

if you join any networks (i do recommend joining some as they help spread your work) you may also make a networks page where you list the networks you are in. similarly any individual page you wish to post and want any newcomer to be able to see, link it in the navigation.

( 003. ) for mutuals, my best advice is to wait. wait until you have made a decent name for yourself through your writings, because honestly as much as there are a lot of nice people here, there are bad too. so you must have a somewhat strong base before you befriend anyone.

mutuals doesn't always have to mean that you talk daily or you read each of their works or you show up in their inbox at every chance, sometimes you just silently follow each other because you like their work, sometimes you just become friends because you like their vibe, sometimes you just occasionally text each other about some mutual likes and dislikes. there is no set criteria, just you do you.

though i must warn you that if the case is such that you ask to be their mutual and then not interact with them at all then that is wrong because you explicitly asked them to follow you to become mutuals and then you ghost- that's basically clout. don't do that to anyone ò⁠_⁠ó⁠ˇ⁠)

( 004. ) be kind, be nice, be humane. like i always say a little kindness goes a long way (this applies to real life especially) you never know what someone is going through in their life or how bad their day might have been or that they are on this site to feel a bit better so it's always good to respond and spread positivity and happiness.

your words may not seem like a lot to you but perhaps to someone it might mean everything. don't be shy to tell someone if you like something about their work or their blog or just about anything it might make their day. never hurts to compliment people now does it? there's so much negativity in the world already, why add to it?

( 005. ) lastly have patience, keep trying and don't give up! some blogs grow big in a month and some in a year. if you don't try you will never know your potential, always strive to improve and always strive to be happy with your work, any amount of validation and compliments will only ever work for a split moment before you go back to feeling miserable if you don't love your work and your effort.

it is very much possible that some works may not do well as others or some works may hit luck and garner a lot of attention or some works may just go unnoticed to a saddening extent, but it's all a part of writing. something you may expect to blow up, might not and something you have no hope in doing good may become your most popular work. it's all luck.

overall my point is, it'll not happen in one day but one day it will surely happen! 🤞🏻

DISCLAIMER ! these are my personal tips that i feel are important enough. may not be everyone's cup of tea and may not work for everyone. you may take what works for you and let the rest be left. and if there is something else you feel that should absolutely be included, you are welcome to reblog with those points or leave them in the comments!

[ohbother2]

hi! so like, i might try writing smut soon enough (because why the hell not amirite?) so like, is there any advice you could give me? like DOs and DONTs, tools that could be useful to avoid orthographic errors etc etc (im used to using chat GPT to look at my horribly, horribly written texts and correct them, but i've got a feeling it will straight up censor it, and english's not my first language, so anything that would make my dirty dirty texts into dirty clean text would be dope)

Hi!

I'm sorry but because you're an ageless blog I'm not going to give actual smut-writing advice, but ig it's okay to give general writing advice?

Just a reminder to everyone, if you're a minor please do not interact with me or my posts!

In all honesty I don't really know what I even do when I write, the words just sort of appear and I'm like 'yep, that works', but that's not the most useful advice, lol

I envision the story I want to read, and then I write it how I want to read it. I hope that makes sense

I guess my main advice would be to find your own niche, like, are you a dialogue or an 'action' based writer? Ofc it's good to be good at both but people have their own strong suits. For me, for example, I'm much better at descriptive writing than dialogue so that's what I focus most of my writing around

People also have their own unique styles and formatting to their writing - I feel as though mine is pretty distinctive with certain types of vocabulary and paragraph spacing/grammar/etc - so I guess it would be good to find a style that works good for you! For example, don't stick to lengthy paragraphs of immense detail if that doesn't come naturally to you, etc

My absolute top priority when writing is to not tell the readers what's going on, but to show it. Sometimes 'They felt X/Y/Z' is a useful tool for emphasising a particular point, but sometimes it detracts from the writing overall.

As an example: 'He felt as if his heart was going to burst from his chest...' (This can be good when used in the right moments, but if that's the only descriptor the writing loses a bit of life to it)

Compared to: 'His heart hammered painfully against his taut ribs as he gasped uselessly for breath...' (This is showing rather than just simply telling, and is how I personally prefer to write a majority of the time)

It's also important not to repeat yourself unnecessarily - it can be good to repeat when you're really trying to emphasise a point, but sometimes writing can stagnate and become less engaging? It's very difficult to find the right balance but it makes a world of difference to a piece of text

For dialogue (arguably my weakest skill) the best piece of advice is that you cannot write accurately how people in real life talk. When we talk we mostly fill out thoughts with nonsense and fluff out the main point - you can't write this because the readers will become disengaged. There's an important balance to find between being too formal for speech, maintaining the main point of the conversation, and ensuring the characters still sound like themselves. I tend to really try and put myself in the characters heads, think about what they'd actually say, and then 'translate' it into a written format that works whilst keeping that characters traits.

The way I 'learnt' to write was through reading, and I'd really recommend you read in your desired writing language (I'm guessing English from your ask) to see the typical structures and vocabulary of that language when written down. Direct translations don't always work, especially with literature, because there are phrases and sayings and common slights-of-tongue that are language specific, so I think it's really useful to get used to that language in its own written form, yk?

I forgot!! But it's also important not to tell your readers everything. Let them fill some gaps in on their own - they don't need to be told how a line of dialogue was said if it's obvious in the speech and context, and they don't always need to know how a character moved across a room or what their hands are doing 100% of the time. Sometimes the best parts of stories are the bits that go unsaid :)

Sorry, this is rambling and probably not very useful, but I've never given writing advice before.

Writing really is all down to the author finding their own 'voice' within their texts, and I'm sure you're writing will be great!!! I hope this helps! :))

[dojunie]

IVE BEEN WANTING TO GREET YOU A WELCOME BACKK!! 🤸🏻‍♀️😭 I WASNT REALLY SURE IF I SHOULD MSG, COZ THIS WOULD BE THE FIRST OF MY ENTIRE TUMBLR CARRER 🫢😭 BUT YAURSS 😭✊🏼 I JUST STARTED FOLLOWING YOUR ACCOUNT A MONTH AGO?? 😭 AND MISDIAL FUCKING ATE.‼️‼️ IT ISNT EVEN FINISHED, YET THE CHAPTERS IVE READ IS ENOUGH FOR ME TO KNOW ITS A MASTERPIECE FR 😭✊🏼 BRO I WAS LITERALLY READING IT ON A SCHOOL NIGHT, AND GURL WHEN I TELL YOU I COULD NOT STOP READING.BLOODSHOT EYES GLUED TO MY SCREEN, CHARGING MY PHONE AND LAYING ON ONE SIDE TILL IT REACHES A CERTAIN AMNT OF PERCENTAGE SO I COUKD TURN AROUND KNOWING I COULDNT WAIT AND PAUSE READING TYPE THANG 😭 SAFE TO SAY I DID NOT GET SLEEP 😭 I DEADASS FINISHED THOSE 2 CHAPTERS IN ONE GO, AND I SWORE TO MYSELF ID KEEP CHAPTER 3 FOR WHEN U UPDATE SO ID HAVE SOMETHING TO KEEP ME SANE. I LIED. I COULDNT HELP IT BRAH, YOUR WRITING JUST TEWW GOODD. I READ THE LAST CHAPTER IN SCHOOL, AND AFTER I FINISHED I WAS LITERALLY STUNNED BRO. LIKE WHADAFAK, I SAT THERE LONGING (😂😭) LIKE REAL NOT FAKE. I WAS GLUED TO MY SEAT JUST WISHING AND PRAYING FOR ANOTHER CHAPTER 😭✊🏼 I WAS DEADASS DYING WAITING FOR THE NEXT UPDATE BRO. AND I WAS EVEN MORE FLABBERGASTED WHEN I REALIZED YOU LAST UPDATED ON DECEMBER OF LAST YEAR⁉️⁉️ BRO I CRIED. I PRAYED, AND I CRIED 😭. I THOUGHT IT WAS GONNA BE ONE OF THOSE ABANDONED STORIES OR ABANDONED BLOGS 😭🙏🏼🧎🏻‍♀️ BUT BRO I LOVE GOD FR I LOVE THE UNIVERSE THEY BE WATCHING MY BACK COZ LITERALLY NOT EVEN A COUPLE OF DAYS LATER YOU CAME WITH AN UPDATE‼️ YAHEY😭🤸🏻‍♀️✨🧚🏻‍♂️ TALK ABT PERFECT TIMINGG‼️ BUT YAURS IK DIS WAS A LONG MSG 🤣 COULDNT CONTAIN MYSELF FR 😭✊🏼 BUT I JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW, TAKE YOUR TIME WITH SETTLING IN, UPDATING, AND EVERYTHANG. YOU HAVE A LOT GOING ON WITH JOB HUNTING, SCHOOL, AND MOVING!! DONT FEEL PRESSURED TO UPDATE, TAKE YOUR TIME!! (Please update misdal soon 🙏🏼🧎🏻‍♀️😭🤣 ‼️half jks‼️🤣) BUT YAURS TAKE YOUR TIME AND MAKE SURE YOU’RE PUTTING YOURSELF FIRST 🫶🏻 LOVE YOUSSS ✨🧚🏻‍♂️🤸🏻‍♀️🫶🏻 STAY SAFES AND HEALTHY IN THE MEANWHILEE 😋🫶🏻🫶🏻😭 (sorry if I didn’t really make sense, English isn’t my first language 😭🙏🏼🫶🏻)

idk i think im in love w u

definitely need to put this under a read more bc i have been SCREAMING!!!!!!! OVER THIS ASK FOR THE LAST FEW DAYS!!!!!!! when i tell you im going to print out this message and stick it to the wall in front of my desk so i can see it every time i sit down to write najkdajdjsklajd nckdsn i love this ask i love u i love this ask i love you!!!!!!!!! im so happy the lil stories i write about kpop boys grabbed u hard enough to make u stay up on a school night, dying phone and all 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 as i was writing ch4 and starting ch5 i was thinking of this message like 'i cant let colorful anon down i have to get this shit out BEFORE 2024!!!!!!!!" AND SO BE IT IT SHALL BE DONE

its crazy to think that its Literally been an entire year since the last update and people are still so invested........... like im cryin a little yall are seriously the realest

i love u im not kidding this is my favorite ask of all time. i almost dont want to answer it so it can stay in my ask box forever but u clearly went all out in writing this so i simply cannot allow the world to not see your work of art

screenshotting to make it my wallpaper as we speak

i am dubbing you colorful anon, pls come back whenever you want even if its just to leave an emoji in my inbox when ch 4 drops

im going to staple this message to every wall of my house i am so honored to be ur first ask

going to OPEN the misdial google doc and write some more for YEW!!!!!!! CAUSE U DESERVE IT!!!! MUAH MUAH KISSES I AM TUCKING U INTO BED LOVINGLY!!!!!!!!!!

[bosspigeon]

If it’s not too much, I request all of those companion!Tav questions for Pyre :3c If it’s too much to answer at once, then just the ones that intrigue you the most!

hello this has been in my ask for a while to the point that i had to dig back through my blog to find the post in question! but i have since tagged it so i can find it again~ i have not actually played the game and probably won't be able to for a while, so i'm gonna just answer the ones i can with the info i have! <3

Where can your Tav be recruited? Are they first encountered on the Nautiloid, or in the Nautiloid crash region? Or are they not recruitable until a later act?

i think of Pyre as a fairly early to grab optional companion, and he can only be recruited if you side with/protect the tiefling refugees. i think he might be a contact of Zevlor's that he tells you to seek out for help. an old brother-in-arms~ you will probably find him Chilling and Surrounded By Corpses while casually cleaning his sword.

Do the other companions have special comments or reactions upon recruiting your Tav?

Wyll for sure makes a comment about Pyre being "one hell of a tiefling" (haha) just based on size alone. "So they were definitely exaggerating about his size... but not by much." He's probably heard stories here and there from folks around the camp that know him/know of him. might even have a fun little kind-of-awed war story or two he's been told that are definitely a bit overblown after so long. Astarion just calls him something like a Wall Of Meat and sounds Vaguely Hungry about that. Karlach wants to see if she can goad him into a sparring match~ Shadowheart, ofc, senses Selunite magic and is not pleased...

Does your Tav have any comments or advice when you recruit other companions?

Pyre is going to be polite and not just look straight at Astarion like "You know that's a vampire, right?" but he will probably say something along the lines of "Make sure you keep an eye on the pale one." Definitely has heard glowing reviews about Wyll and Karlach, but probably has some comments on their being... a bit green, but well-meaning and skilled nonetheless. He is polite about Shadowheart too, because he's not the most devout of paladins and is more focused on his vow rather than outright worship, but he's a very Cautious Type, so he's the sort to go down the line and give a Pros/Cons list lmao. "Idk she might betray you, she might not tho you decide" cryptic and not too helpful but he never said he was. He also has a plan prepared on how to kill literally anyone he meets if he thinks they're a threat in any way, and if he likes you enough, he might share <3

What sort of general actions raise or lower their approval?Are there any instances where your Tav can permanently leave the party, depending on player character actions?

Lumping these ones together because HOO BOY YEAH Pyre does not fuck around with certain things. His vow means he cannot sit by and just watch certain things go down. Obviously you won't even meet him if you side against the tieflings, so any sort of behavior that puts them in danger? You are suddenly hearing boss battle music. definitely gonna get some disapproval points for keeping that tome of Thay or giving it to anyone but him so he can destroy it, but he might still stick around, just side-eye you intensely. he doesn't really approve of most types of necromancy, but he's surprisingly civil with Withers. Basically any sort of treating people like chattel or tokens to be bartered, especially children or those who can't otherwise defend themselves gets HEAVY disapproval and to a certain extent straight-up Aggro~

Do they have any secrets that can be revealed? What are the prerequisites for this secret coming to light?

OH BOY SEVERAL. the one he's most careful about? that fact that he is not even a tiefling. he's a cambion. that one is more likely to come out than the rest of it, which is that he's half-succubus specifically. dealing with Raphael, he'd probably make himself pretty scarce, while also warning the player not to trust him. the whole House of Hope situation will have him tense and quierter than usual. He is staring daggers at Raphael the entire time, daring him to say something (which I'm sure he would eventually, if you continuousy involve Pyre in quests with Raphael) and i feel like Pyre's origins would come out specifically upon dealing with either Haarlep or Mizora.

What do they say when the Player Character asks them to stay in camp? How about when the Player Character asks them to come adventuring again?

Leaving him at camp: [Judgemental Grunt]

Come Adventuring: [Approving hum.]

Does your Tav have any escalating conflicts with one of the other companions, like Lae’zel and Shadowheart’s knife-fight?

the only thing that really comes to mind is Physically Depositing Astarion at the MC's feet and telling him to keep his teeth to himself hfdkjshgjl. idk he's kind of the king of staying in his own lane.

[not-xpr-art]

Art Advice #14 - Downloading and/or Creating brushes for digital art!

Hi all!

I got asked recently to give some advice on how to download brushes in digital art (since I mentioned it in my last digital art advice post) so, ask and ye shall receive lol!

Now, I’ll have to preface this by saying I only know how to download and create brushes for FireAlpaca (the program I use to draw), so things might be slightly different for other software.

(Btw thank you @hellsitevistor for your question, I hope this is somewhat helpful to you!)

Downloading and/or Creating brushes for digital art!

As mentioned at the beginning of this post, I only really know the specifics around FireAlpaca, so I’d say to look up specific tutorials or blogs for whatever program you use if you want more precise information, but if you just want a more general guide for downloading and/or creating brushes then stick around!

I actually downloaded the textured brushes I use about 5 years ago, so it was a struggle to remember exactly what I did lol 

Downloading brushes

The place I’ve used for getting free brushes is DeviantArt. Something good about this site is because the comments can tell you if the brushes are any good & the creators often have answered faqs from people about how to download and add their brushes to the program. 

(Also, I know that some artists create and sell their own brushes, so that is another place where you can get downloadable brushes (and you get to support independent creators which is always great lol!))

Now, I would say if you’re looking at brush packs made a few years ago, a lot of the download links no longer work. I’ve also found that there are certain file types that you can’t download with FireAlpaca (they only work with Photoshop) or probably other free programs, so it might be a little hard to actually find brush sets that you can actually download. 

Once you’ve downloaded a brush set you particularly like, which is often a zip folder, you’ll have to extract the brushes into png files (make sure it’s a Transparent png though!) 

(This is something that may have changed in the 5 years since I did it, so I am sorry I can’t be more specific about downloading brushes... I also have 0 clue on how this works for art Apps you get on ipads/tablets etc either...)

On FireAlpaca you click on the ‘Add Brush’ icon and select ‘Add Brush (bitmap)’ option. (you can see it below, although you can also find this option along the top bar and click on the ‘Brush’ dropdown menu!)

This will let you select the png image of the brush and will pop up the brush creation box! (Seen below) I won’t go into what all the options mean because a) I honestly know know what all these things do lol and b) I always think it’s better to just have a play around with them yourself!

Speaking of brush creation...

Creating your own brushes

One thing I discovered a few years ago is that you can actually make your own brushes pretty easily without having to download anything! 

You can use the brushes you already have to create your own (often this can just be a collection of dots or random squiggles which can go on to create some really cool textured brushes!! As with the downloaded brushes, make sure you save whatever brush you create as a Transparent png, otherwise it won’t work!) 

(below is an example of a recent one I did, which you can see in both Edit Brush images I’ve shared in this post!)

The brush creation box will give you various options on how to create various types of brushes. 

The ‘Bitmap’ option will just give you the brush you’ve either downloaded or created as a repeated image, which can be good for interesting background textures! ‘Bitmap watercolour’ gives a similar, but more ‘brush-like’ effect (give you pressure opacity options)!  The ‘Scatter’ effect is good for collections of dots for things like freckles or stars. The ‘Scatter watercolour’ one is by far my favourite, and usually what I use to create my textured brushes! (see below for where to find these options!)

Play around with the other adjustments until you find a perfect combination (remember that you can change this at any point when you’re using the brush, so don’t worry if you find you don’t like certain effects cos you can change them back!) and voila! 

As always, I’m not an expert on digital art, and I’m basing this post purely on the program that I use so this may not be as useful to you if you use something else! 

But I hope that this can be helpful to anyone who was confused by how to do this! And feel free to ask a question about anything regarding digital art/or art in general and I’ll see what I can do <3

[goodmode]

Lemm: 11 (by which i mean post a photo of a bug that kinda looks like lemm), 13, 25, 31, 48?

11. Faceclaim for the role (bug photo edition)

the elephant beetle has a very good short-horn-long-horn thing going on that suits his visual BUT the thing about those is, the long horn and general design suits Nailsmith way more. yknow with the fork at the end. so i don't think lemm is that. also, precious little fuzz on those things

woolly chafers have the exact amount of fluff i'd expect from Lemm but they don't have proper horns!! also they're apparently considered excellent fliers. i don't think my interpretation of lemm lends itself to having wings at all. (i've seen some fabulous interpretations! i fully believe everyone should have wings ever if it's cool. i love that. enjoy seeing it around! just not for my headcanon specifically, i like him being a groundbound normie)

the problem with placing Lemm is that his body looks a lot like like the "generic bug" design you have for most of the husks. which are incredibly hard to place because they're just circles with lines across em. and a head. like, you can tell mantises are mantises but what the hell are the generic bugs meant to be.

i can't place him with anything that is both a.) fluffy around the neck and b.) has strong-looking horns. so i guess my headcanon for "what kind of bug is Lemm" is just: he's a bug. he's fluffy and he has horns. i cannot elaborate and choose not to try. if i wanted to justify making up a species for him i could go down any number of worldbuilding routes and the truth is i just don't care to, he's just some guy to me

tl;dr long answer to basically say i don't have one lol. same as i don't have one for a lot of the Generic Bug Types in hallownest. at least with lemm i can say i've thought extensively about it and just turned up zero zilch nada, and am choosing to stick with the "eh, he's somethin" answer

(i headcanon he's a beetle of some kind, and that the horns lend themselves to fighting/wrestling opponents. that's as far as i can get before irl species ask me to pick a branch of specialists and ruin his aesthetic one way or the other)

13. Dumbest thing they've ever done

have you ever been young and thought you're indiana jones? you may be entitled to compensation [a/n: deliberately vague because i already have a specific headcanon for this and there's a good chance i'll do something with it]

second dumbest thing is generally coming to hallownest. not a decision for an older bug with no real combat skills to make with their head in the right place

25. 3 things they’d want to take with them if they were dropped off in the middle of nowhere

a crowbar/pry-bar (hefty and practical), a wanderer's journal (reading material! ...and also has some heft), and a brush/comb for his beard because the last thing you want is tangles

31. If they had a tumblr what would it look like?

it would have one of the default boring black-on-white layouts that makes it look like a WordPress blog. his askbox would be permanently closed and his bio would say something about not wanting to be interacted with, but the proof is in the pudding (pages and pages of him arguing back and forth very rudely with other history enthusiasts). i also think he picks up a very complicated tagging system very quickly and it makes sense only to him.

mostly though, it'd be reblogs of museum photos and rebuttals about historical theories. occasionally he leaves likes on certain people's posts. he thinks no one can see your likes but he hasn't actually turned off that setting and has no idea everyone can see him exhibiting blatant favouritism, so if you scroll down his likes page it's 80% history, 15% posts by ghost about stuff they've found, and 5% younger bugs posting about history in ways that are completely incorrect (is he laughing at how dumb they are or is he appreciative of a budding interest in history? it can be both)

48. Scariest moment of their life

there have been a few! he's had a long one. a certain incident in his younger years, perhaps. after that, descending into the City of Tears for the first time and seeing the state it's in and how big it is and the shambling husks and spikes and everything else - realising how monumental this task will be and how one wrong move in a ruin like this could cost him everything, along with a haunting understanding that he is not getting any younger. scary stuff. let it never be said he backs down from a fight though

(in rp shenanigans he's also been pretty fuckin terrified by the Shadelord. ranks pretty high on the list. he didn't back down then either)

[ask meme]

[lizartss]

Good morning to you too!! Hope yesterday was good for you and today is even better🥺 honestly you are literally so kind and sweet I don't have words. I will try not to make it to 10k😔 though they are turning into essays at this point😭 really hope you don't mind and definitely no pressure to reply!!

Anyway, there isn't a need to thank me🥺 I was just saying what I saw. You've worked really hard and I just admire the thoughts you put into it so much? I forgot to add last time but you said about me being mature and responsible, I wanted to spin it on you because you actually seem so mature and responsible when it comes to your art, and I'm sure that bleeds into other facets of your life.

Of course I find you inspiring, of course😭 I will say it again and again, but the way you don't settle, the way you're always studying something or something other to make your art better even when it already looks so good, that fact is just so impactful to me. I used to think that everything had a time limit to it, and I could only hone my skills to a certain point before I'd come to a natural pause in life, but you make me think otherwise!! The journey never really ends, and time will never run from you, the hands that you use to make and the mind you use to think, won't run from you. I came to those conclusions because of you🥺

I get told often I sound like an old person,, old soul?? It's fine😭 I sometimes feel a similar type of way on my own blog, like I should keep some sort of distance and not be up in everyone's face too much, but then it dawned upon me that, well, it is my blog. Your blog is yours, it's your space, be as non-adulty (?????????) as you like. Life is tough and you are allowed to be true to yourself in at least one aspect of it, if you're always wearing a skin it will stick to you. I understand the feeling though, and hopefully with time, the pressure will ease the longer you spend there + you'll find some sort of solace in your blog too!! (You can go off tangent, I do it a lot too😭)

Again, I'm glad!! I can't say this from an artist's perspective, because all I can really do is write, and badly at that — but, it's a bit of a slow dance sometimes. One step forward, two steps back, spinning around in circles wondering what the end goal is, or if you'll ever be content even when you do reach it. Setting the bar higher and higher each time you're able to grab hold of it, those are definitely signs of progress. Think of yourself like a plant, if it helps, you won't sprout in a day. Seeds need to germinate, after that they need to be cared for well, watered, given sunlight, spoken to kindly (yes, I speak to my plants😩), and even with all of that, it takes a while for them to grow. Gravity will work against you, sometimes bad weather, sometimes bugs and viruses, you'll make it still, just be attentive to yourself and your own needs. You are blossoming.

Also, I made another typo in the last one😭 it was meant to say ‘I don't regret’ and I put ‘I don't regrey’😭 so embarrassed rn😭😭😭 I'm dyslexic anyway, but the human mind basically has built in autocorrect, I'm actually glad you missed my mistake😭 I think we live in the same timezone because, at my time of sending it's like 7, but whenever you posted it was 6 for me too. You didn't have to reply to me so early in the morning, sorry for taking up your time😭😭😭

Gonna put this bit here too because I don't want to bombard you with asks for every exchange, but there's so much to pay attention to in your works, of course I'd notice!! Thank you more, because I get to look at all the amazing work you post and it makes me happy🥺 you deserve all the praise, honest, way more than I will have enough words to say. I still hope I'm not bugging you😔 I'll have you know that if you let me, I'll just keep talking though so please do tell me to shut up at whatever point it gets overbearing😭

HIII AGAIN!! I hope you had a great day too anon!! It’s night now sorry took me some time to get to this! I wanted to read it before bed so I can go to sleep happy :’) Ok first of all your asks read like a fic and I feel kinda bad replying with my not so good words when you’re saying the most beautiful things ever??? 😭😭 so I’m also sorry for that

My jaws hanging a little you actually came to that conclusion about me being mature n responsible. Bc I have a lot of ppl calling me that irl (idk if I actually am thoo) so for you to have inferred that even with the way I act on here you are a very very observant person?? And the fact that you came to that conclusion through my art?? I just a dhshgsgsgeskkddg

And I used to think that way too tbh. Also it’s nice to know I’m not alone in these things. And kind of related to being yourself and all too, yeah life is just too hard as it is so you gotta at least a bit unserious about it. And really tbhhh you can do whatever the hell you want at anytime you want, there’s no point to limiting yourself. But seriosuly these kinds of things definitely easier said than done though :’(. Even if it’s in our own spaces like our blogs where we SHOULD be able to be however we want, it’s hard to detach from external or even internal pressure. We can think things out logically as much as we want but the feels are just too strong at times yknow. We can only do our best when it comes to things like these and yeah eventually get more comfortable doing it (hopefully?).

BTW I didn’t mean to call you old like that 😭😭😭 I apologiseeee, but you’re giving older sibling vibes like in the best way possible I promise

I mean you say you can only write (you’re great at that btw) but you seem to know a lot about art 🤔🤔🤔 yeah I’ve wondered for a long time what the end goal is esp for me doing this as a hobby I’m like am I wasting time, trying to improve so hard? “Setting the bar higher and higher each time you’re able to grab hold of it” Pretty much encapsulates everything I feel. Tbh I don’t think I’d ever be completely satisfied but I think I’ve come to accept that, I’m just that way as a person. And as you’ve said it’s a sign of progress which I guess that’s my goal now. As long as I’m making progress no matter how little I should be happy. We’re all always changing as people anyway, each day we might find something new to be inspired by and we might want to change how we do things, whether it’s art or something else in life, we’re really too hard on ourselves sometimes

I love your plant analogy, I truly do, it’s beautiful, but I truly am a bad plant parent so 😭😭 thank you for reminding me to water them! I think I might start talking to them too.. I’ll rant to them and stop subjecting the people on here to my break downs haha…………

Honestly it’s great that the brain has its own autocorrect but yeah, when it comes to having to read my own things I wish it would turn off :’) Also I’m in the UK so it’s GMT time zone! Actually just spoke to a moot abt this today but apparently people didn’t realise that but I feel like I talk too much about where I live I might accidentally dox myself 💀

I’m honestly really glad you enjoy it!! And I appreciate you personally telling me my art is good. I doubt myself a lot as you know at this point (but anyway I think that’s natural). And you’re really not bugging me so don’t feel like you are. I mean I post my art on here because I wanna share it for myself, but also honest I am of course looking for external validation. So pleasee why would I refuse free compliments like this!! And I love how you interpret my art btw, I mean people are free to interpret art however they want (like it’s one of the best parts about it), but you seem to get exactly the things I want to convey so that makes me really really happy!

Please feel free to shoot me a DM if you feel comfortable and we can be moots or you’re always to welcome in the ask inbox as anon! And since we’re in the same/similar time zone I wish you a good night! Hope you have some nice and peaceful sleep tonight (with the cold pillows ofc) <3

[fatliberation]

I’m Abandoning Body Positivity and Here’s Why

In short: it’s fatphobic.

“A rallying cry for a shift in societal norms has now become the skinny girl’s reassurance that she isn��t really fat. Fatness, through this lens of ‘body positivity’, remains the worst thing a person can be.” (Kayleigh Donaldson)

•  •  •

I have always had a lot of conflicting opinions about the body positivity movement, but it’s much more widely known (and accepted, go figure) than the fat liberation movement, so I often used the two terms interchangeably in conversation about anti-fatness. But the longer I’ve been following the body positivity movement, the more I’ve realized how much it has strayed from its fat lib origins. It has been hijacked; deluded to center thin, able, white, socially acceptable bodies.

Bopo’s origins are undoubtedly grounded in fat liberation. The fat activists of the 1960s paved the way for the shred of size acceptance we see in media today, initially protesting the discrimination and lack of access to equal opportunities for fat people specifically. This early movement highlighted the abuse, mental health struggles, malpractice in the medical field, and called for equal pay, equal access, equal respect, an end to fatphobic structures and ideas. It saddens me that it hasn’t made much progress in those regards. 

Today, the #bopo movement encapsulates more the idea of loving your own body versus ensuring that individuals regardless of their weight and appearance are given equal opportunities in the workplace, schools, fashion and media. Somehow those demands never made it outside of the ‘taboo’ category, and privileged people would much more readily accept the warm and fuzzy, sugar-coated message of “love yourself!” But as @yrfatfriend once said, this idea reduces fat people’s struggles to a problem of mindset, rather than a product of external oppressors that need to be abolished in order for fat people to live freely.

That generalized statement, “love yourself,” is how a movement started by fat people for the rights of fat people was diluted so much, it now serves a thin model on Instagram posting about how she has a tummy roll and cellulite on her thighs - then getting praised for loving her body despite *gasp!* its minor resemblance to a fat body. 

Look. Pretty much everyone has insecurities about their bodies, especially those of us who belong to marginalized groups. If you don’t have body issues, you’re a privileged miracle, but our beauty-obsessed society has conditioned us to want to look a certain way, and if we have any features that the western beauty standard considers as “flaws,” yeah! We feel bad about it! So it’s not surprising that people who feel bad about themselves would want to hop on a movement that says ‘hey, you’re beautiful as you are!’ That’s a message everyone would like to hear. Any person who has once thought of themselves as less than beautiful now feels that this movement is theirs. And everyone has insecurities, so everyone feels entitled to the safe space. And when a space made for a minority includes the majority, the cycle happens again and the majority oppresses the minority. What I’m trying to explain here is that thin people now feel a sense of ownership over body positive spaces. 

Regardless of how badly thin people feel about their bodies, they still experience thin privilege. They can sit down in a theater or an airplane without even thinking about it, they can eat in front of others without judgement, they can go the doctor with a problem and actually have it fixed right away, they can find cute clothes in their size with ease, they do not suffer from assumptions of laziness/failure based on stereotype, they see their body type represented everywhere in media, the list goes on and on. They do not face discrimination based off of the size of their body. 

Yet diet culture and fatphobia affects everyone, and of course thin people do still feel bad about the little fat they have on their bodies. But the failure to examine WHY they feel bad about it, is what perpetuates fatphobia within the bopo movement. They’re labeled “brave” for showing a pinch of chub, yet fail to address what makes it so acceptably daring, and how damaging it is to people who are shamed for living in fat bodies. Much like the rest of society, thin body positivity is still driven by the fear of fat, and does nothing to dismantle fatphobia within structures or within themselves.

Evette Dionne sums it up perfectly in her article, “The Fragility of Body Positivity: How a Radical Movement Lost Its Way.”

“The body-positive media economy centers these affirming, empowering, let-me-pinch-a-fat-roll-to-show-how-much-I-love-myself stories while failing to actually challenge institutions to stop discriminating against fat people. More importantly, most of those stories center thin, white, cisgender, heterosexual women who have co-opted the movement to build their brands. Rutter has labeled this erasure ‘Socially Acceptable Body Positivity.’

“On social media, it actually gets worse for fat bodies: We’re not just being erased from body positivity, fat women are being actively vilified. Health has become the stick with which to beat fat people with [sic], and the benchmark for whether body positivity should include someone” (Dionne).

Ah, yes. The medicalization of fat bodies, and the moralization of health. I’ve ranted about this before. Countless comments on posts of big women that say stuff like “I’m all for body positivity, but this is just unhealthy and it shouldn’t be celebrated.” I’ve heard writer/activist Aubrey Gordon once say that body positivity has become something like a shield for anti-fatness. It’s anti-fatness that has been repackaged as empowerment. It’s a striking double-standard. Fat people are told to be comfortable in their bodies (as if that’s what’s going to fix things) but in turn are punished when they’re okay with being fat. Make it make sense.

Since thin people feel a sense of ownership over body positive spaces, and they get to hide behind “health” when they are picking and choosing who can and cannot be body positive, they base it off of who looks the most socially acceptable. And I’m sure they aren’t consciously picking and choosing, it comes from implicit bias. But the socially acceptable bodies they center are small to medium fat, with an hourglass shape. They have shaped a new beauty standard specifically FOR FAT PEOPLE. (Have you ever seen a plus sized model with neck fat?? I’m genuinely asking because I have yet to find one!) The bopo movement works to exclude and silence people who are on the largest end of the weight spectrum. 

Speaking of exclusion, let’s talk about fashion for a minute.

For some reason, (COUGH COUGH CAPITALISM) body positivity is largely centered around fashion. And surprise surprise, it’s still not inclusive to fat people. Fashion companies get a pat on the back for expanding their sizing two sizes up from what they previously offered, when they are still leaving out larger fat people completely. In general, clothing companies charge more for clothes with more fabric, so people who need the largest sizes are left high and dry. It’s next to impossible to find affordable clothes that also look nice. Fashion piggybacks on the bopo movement as a marketing tactic, and exploits the very bodies it claims to be serving. (Need I mention the time Urban Outfitters used a "curvy” model to sell a size it doesn’t even carry?)

The movement also works to exclude and silence fat Black activists.

In her article, “The Body Positivity Movement Both Takes From and Erases Fat Black Women” Donyae Coles explains how both white people and thin celebrities such as Jameela Jamil profit from the movement that Black women built.

“Since long before blogging was a thing, fat Black women have been vocal about body acceptance, with women like Sharon Quinn and Marie Denee, or the work of Sonya Renee Taylor with The Body Is Not An Apology. We’ve been out here, and we’re still here, but the overwhelming face of the movement is white and thin because the mainstream still craves it, and white and thin people have no problem with profiting off the work of fat, non-white bodies.”

“There is a persistent belief that when thin and/or white people enter the body positive realm and begin to repeat the messages that Black women have been saying for years in some cases, when they imitate the labor that Black women have already put in that we should be thankful that they are “boosting” our message. This completely ignores the fact that in doing so they are profiting off of that labor. They are gaining the notoriety, the mark of an expert in something they learned from an ignored Black woman” (Coles).

My next essay will go into detail about this and illuminate key figures who paved the way for body acceptance in communities of color. 

The true purpose of this movement has gotten completely lost. So where the fuck do we go from here? 

We break up with it, and run back to the faithful ex our parents disapproved of. We go back to the roots of the fat liberation movement, carved out for us by the fat feminists, the queer fat activists, the fat Black community, and the allies it began with. Everything they have preached since the 1960s and 70s is one hundred percent applicable today. We get educated. We examine diet culture through a capitalist lens. We tackle thin, white-supremacist systems and weight based discrimination, as well as internalized bias. We challenge our healthcare workers to unlearn their bias, treat, and support fat patients accordingly. We make our homes and spaces accessible and welcoming to people of any size, or any (dis)ability. “We must first protect and uplift people in marginalized bodies, only then can we mandate self-love” (Gordon).

Think about it. In the face of discrimination, mistreatment, and emotional abuse, we as a society are telling fat people to love their bodies, when we should be putting our energy toward removing those fatphobic ideas and structures so that fat people can live in a world that doesn’t require them to feel bad about their bodies. It’s like hitting someone with a rock and telling them not to bruise!

While learning to love and care for the body that you’re in is important, I think that body positivity also fails in teaching that because it puts even more emphasis on beauty. Instead of saying, “you don’t have to be ‘beautiful’ to be loved and appreciated,” its main lesson is that “all bodies are beautiful.” We live in a society obsessed with appearance, and it is irresponsible to ignore the hierarchy of beauty standards that exist in every space. Although it should be relative, “beautiful” has been given a meaning. And that meaning is thin, abled, symmetric, and eurocentric. 

Beauty and ugliness are irrelevant, made-up constructs. People will always be drawn to you no matter what, so you deserve to exist in your body without struggling to conform to an impossible and bigoted standard. Love and accept your body for YOURSELF AND NO ONE ELSE, because you do not exist to please the eyes of other people. That’s what I wish we were teaching instead. Radical self acceptance!

As of today, the ultimate message of the body positivity movement is: Love your body “despite its imperfections.” Or people with “perfect and imperfect bodies both deserve love.” As long as we are upholding the notion that there IS a perfect body that looks a certain way, and every body that falls outside of that category is imperfect, we are upholding white supremacy, eugenics, anti-fatness, and ableism.

[fandomeldersintheirthirties]

Hello, I am an anti (due to personal traumas which have made me stick to that side) but I do have a genuine question.

Why do you think all antis are trying to scrub the internet like conservatives?

That is not what I want, at least personally. I simply do not want others to be groomed by the content that some proshippers make (as what happened to me). Obviously, people will get groomed by porn that doesn't feature some topics proshippers cover. Its inevitable, its going to happen, I am by no means anti-porn. But this stuff can be quite effective in doing so. Once again, not claiming youre attempting to groom anyone or anything like that but. I think you can understand what I'm trying to get across.

Apologies for any spelling mistakes, as I was typing in a moving bus. Thank you for your response in advanced.

Your ask reminded me of an ask I've seen on olderthannetfic's blog and here it is with an excellent addition. You literally just admited yourself that people can be groomed by things that are not "proship" (whatever that means). Heck, people can use pretty vanilla stuff in order to manipulate and groom others - "Look, I'm not making that kind of gross content, trust me".

So you want to ban certain topics form the internet because, according to your own opinion, they might potentialy hurt people or are responsible for your own triggers is exatcly a definition of censorship.

Not to mention that internet cersonship simply doesn't work, you will only be more endangered of eccountering these topics where they don't belong because people won't be able to use detailed content warnings. Just look at how TikTok users made up new words to go around extreme censorship on the platform. Yup, censorship didn't make people stop talking about suicide and death, they're just talking about being "unalive" and tell others to "k-word" themselves now...

[pufflocks]

Hello again Zen! First I just wanna say that you don’t need to apologize about what happened to the other fic. If you ever feel like you wanna reattempt it, just tell me and I’ll send it again. This request is also smut like the last one and I hope that’s ok!

So Bakugou, known by the public as the pro hero Dynamight, has been having it tough at work the past 2 weeks. He knew that technically it was partly his fault. You see, Bakugou is in a secret relationship with one of Japan’s most mischievous villains. Y/n L/n. (Male Reader) Y/n was in reality not necessarily a villain. He was seen as one, but he had never actually killed anybody. He was more the type to steal, start some fights/trouble and occasionally blow up some place. He was more mischievous than evil. Though Bakugou knew that Y/n wasn’t as bad as everyone thought, and he knew that Y/n did love him. He just had a bit of history.. With that being said: Bakugou had been having it rough lately because his secret boyfriend had been at it like crazy. He also knew that Y/n was intentionally making things difficult for him. So when he was on his patrol and got an emergency signal about trouble just a few blocks away, boy was he ready to hunt Y/n down! Once he saw him he immediately chased him into an alleyway. Y/n had escaped and ran into an abandoned apartment. He thought he was safe. But when he turned around, he wasn’t so lucky. Shit.. Bakugou was ready to completely ravage and take out all of his frustrations on Y/n, as he had him trapped with nowhere to run.

This one could be considered Revenge/Angry S*x. It’s not non-con since Y/n clearly knew what he was in for, and Bakugou wouldn’t do anything incase Y/n seriously stopped him. The request was kinda long, sorry about that lol. If you don’t feel like writing it then it’s fine, and if you’d like to switch some things up then feel free to do so! Also, don’t feel rushed and take your time. Have a nice day/night! :>

Summary: I'm not a dark blogger, but this req is honestly too amazing. I will change some things as to not make it exactly dark though— And thank you for being patient with me and the recent incident. 💛

Warnings: NFSW • proof read • Aged up • mild angst{?}

Cast: Villian!M!Reader x Pro hero!Bakugou

○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○

Y/N L/N. A name that was a hassle to spit out. Your name was spoke like a horrid sickness spreading west to east. All you were was some mildly lowlife starting cat fights on the streets of Japan. It usually happens at night, and that's also when you strike 24 hour open corner stores. Quite fun to be honest. Your skill being up to par of a spy since your original outing clothing you were seen with was mostly black. Your hair was dyed a certain way after a long past incident though, kinda making you stick out overall you camflouged into the night.

Your pro hero, hot headed, stress filled, boyfriend however, was gold spoon in it's prime. A pro hero who was rich with fame. Oh god he had it all in your eyes. You sometimes cried with tears of joyfulness just at the mere slick thought you were dating him. Not no female who just as good looking, like Creati. No, none of that. It's not like he would change that spite his efforts of frustration with your recent activities these part two years.

The streets are terrific to you for these two years though. Everything is nearly breakable and easily fixed with community money. You would think it was community money atleast. All is good since you made sure to leave your mark with explosives.

Hence your love and passion for your lover, you would smuggle cheap fireworks and set them off at random areas of the late hours. The most recent one being pulled off near a school and and anyone could imagine how the headlines went. The news was erratic with wow and terror of where the explosion even came from, who set it off. Little did they obviously not know —

It was pro hero, Katsuki Bakugous boyfriend.

--

On to other things. Bakugou was in a meeting. Apparently he was being caught up with some warning of a manic villain roaming the streets and city alone.

"So what ?" The room was silent as all eyes transferred front to the back where he sat. Eye bags slightly visible of how stressed he really was after the news confirmed he was.

A co-worker of his, Kirishima raised his hand in apparent anxiousness. "Um", he coughed into his fist before speaking again. "Well, Bakubro he has been going at it for nearly 2 years. No one even know what he looks like, hell man." Starting to get his voice back he finally said, "We probably don't even know if he is a he !" The rooms tension was held up to a few more minutes before Bakugou just got up and walked out.

Another co-worker of his, Mina sparked up and said, "Where are you going !" Her words fell on deaf ears as he was already gone.

Heavy weighted footsteps of his boots were heard along the agency's hallways as people made sure to step out of his way. Grabbing his stuff most important for his next move being his car keys. His brain hurt of how fucking frustrating it is to be held back from work because of his delinquent boyfriend wants to treat the world as a damn playground. He couldn't take it! The stress and anxiety he kept for 2 years was just high enough for him to fuck one out. And he might just.

Just because those assholes didn't know where to find you, doesn't mean he can't. You were always close to a rundown apartment in an alleyway doctoring up a new firework of your own or anything remotely for distruction.

And there you were. In a damn corner completely unaware of the 6 foot presence behind you. Horny and exhausted was a nasty mix for anyone and Bakugou is a worse case as he grabbed you by your arm turning you around.

Alert entered your mind as you nearly, by a measly hair burnt him with a match you had. Why was here was all you could ask yourself, feeling his dramatic hot pants near your neck.

"Why-" No time for speaking when he was highly eager to ravage your ass. You knew how he was from time time since you've met him and because of this you have gotten the worst and the best of him. Sex and life alone was hot and dangerous between the both of you.

His lips marked yours up with a grunt of his own making it seem as if he was feasting on your chapped ones. The dryness making it sting sweetly only adding to the arousal you now felt for yourself. Kissing him. Him not taking his time as he will easily swallow his food without chewing.

"I'm fucking pissed." He snapped. This version of him was the only version you couldn't take. No type of convincing could make an outsider believe your actions to one another was not non consensual. His slightly bigger form compared to your own was trifling as it was pressed up to your chest.

After minutes of searching eachothers mouths with fever and rush he finally stripped himself from his pants. You caught a rare glimpse of how hard he really was. Now this was irritating you at this point. You were no sore loser, but if someone ever took something from you like candy it would easily be endgame.

"Stop fucking pouting. I just got out of a meeting early", he adjusted his position a bit. "To fuck your meddling ass." He closed the space between you two as his cologne and natural scenticked your senses. A shiver went down your spine like a fresh cold drop of sweat as you backed away into the corner. He followed that and smirked. You couldn't be serious.

"Turn around. I wanna see it." He huffed, impatiently. You obviously did what you were told. No time in making him even more pissed. He admired your obedience when it came to your relationship. Only if you could follow that up in turning yourself in. Sadly you were too prideful, probably why you both have an odd ball bond with eachother.

Like lightning your pants were down just like his as he slapped your ass with a strikingly heavy hand. Watching your arse slightly move was guilty enjoyment of his own.

"Ah !" You covered your mouth quickly in fear of his scolding. Number 1 rule of him when frustrated was that on all accounts. Don't. Fucking. Make. A. Peep. That reminder did not fail to make you turn back with pleading eyes with him looking back at you with pliant disbelief.

"Yer' really trying to fuckin' test me, yeah ?" He asked. Not loud how he usually is, but a lower octave with a nonchalant expression. He was tired. Tired of your prideful denial of going to jail. Tired of these late damn meetings at the agency. Tired of his parents calling him because he was doing this to himself. He was fucking exhausted of it all. His top tier was you especially.

☆

That's completely fine though. He can sex all of this out on his handsome villain boyfriend.

Y/N fucking L/N.

I hope this is fine, again I'm not a dark blog so if I wrote this along with the req it would get a bit dark. { I love dark blogs so it would be a whole series 💀. }

[caratmagic]

—jung wooyoung—

contains: arguing, pretty offensive words, explicit content

word count: 2.3k

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Enemy Territory 🌻chapter 4🌻

You hate that you find yourself dragging your feet slowly—yet quietly— to Wooyoung’s door. Hoping that the noises you hear from behind it aren’t those of pleasure.

There’s an exchange of them chatting, audible enough to hear but not enough to make out the words. As if snooping like this wasn’t enough, you press the shell of your ear against the door. Using the frame of it to steady your body from making any unnecessary movements or noise.

A rustle. Then several more. You think you hear the sheets move.

They’ve stopped talking.

More silence, then a loud thump onto the floor.

Your heart races out of your chest and you have a hard time picturing what could possibly be going on inside Wooyoung’s room.

Footsteps hurry to the door and before you could get more than halfway down the hall, Wooyoung’s body peeks out from behind his door.

“Snooping on me now?” He scoffs with that annoyingly charming sneer. “I thought we were supposed to stay out of each other’s business? Now look who’s breaking their own rules.”

You shut your eyes tightly while your back faces your ex.

Fuck.

A breath quickly fills your lungs as you turn around in efforts to compose your expressions. You’re somehow confused as to why he was suddenly wearing a shirt.

“I— I was just about to knock and ask you what type of meat you wanted to grill, you idiot.” Your mouth moves faster than your thoughts and you’re so glad that your brain was quick enough to pull something straight out of your ass. “I didn’t want to…  interrupt.”

Wooyoung holds the door open slightly for you to catch a small glimpse of the girl politely seated at the edge of his bed. Blinking curiously at you with a content smile on her face, although her tears still stain her cheeks. “It’s not even noon yet y/n, I’m smarter than that to start having rough sex knowing that you’re in the apartment.”

This thought somehow makes your stomach turn and not in a pleasant way. You didn't want to imagine Wooyoung like this with someone else. Yet, an image of him bare and in his sexual glory flashes across your mind and for a second you forget that you aren’t single. You forget that you have a neglectful boyfriend who likes to have sex with you once a week then proceeds to avoid you until the next weekend arrives.

Does Wooyoung have sex often when I’m not around? Did he have to use the word ‘rough’? Do they have rough sex together?—

Why was the thought of Wooyoung having sex with someone else more distressing to you than the entire problem of your boyfriend literally using you as a weekend booty call?

Not a single soul should know why, because the reality of it all is that: One, Wooyoung is single. And two, you are not.

So you had no right to be bothered about it.

Right?

“Uh. Right,” You subconsciously mess with the tips of your fingers to think of what to say next since you didn’t expect that his comment would throw your mind into a loop. “Just text me when you’ve, um, decided what you want. I’ll head to the store now since you’re busy… so you’ve got 20 minutes to make a choice.”

“No need to wait 20 minutes for me to text you, y/n,” Wooyoung slowly pulls his lips into a gentle smile. A smile that sets off a million bursts of fireworks through your chest. “You already know what kind of meat I like to grill.”

Instantly you blink away the feeling—or at least try to ignore it. “People change. Just wanted to ask in case you had a change in taste.”

Wooyoung presses his lips together before nodding his head slowly. Clearly catching your composure and deciding not to point it out due to the guest on his bed. “Uh, nope. My tastes are constant, y/n.”

The worst part of it all is, your conversation was being monitored by a ditsy flower, just waiting for Wooyoung to come back and take care of her… You hated it. Everything about this set up.

Now, heading out of the apartment to get groceries seemed like a much better idea to you than twiddling your thumbs to wait for Wooyoung’s pretty guest to leave.

“I’ll head out then.”

Upon grabbing your purse and your keys, you curse at yourself mentally for getting caught snooping. Even scolding your heart for causing your mind to lose control of your emotions.

************

It had only been half an hour since you left to get ingredients for the meal with Wooyoung, yet a familiar vehicle pulls into the apartment complex parking lot.

A few flights up and your boyfriend is back at the front of your door. Sure to himself that your car has left and that you’d be gone for a while.

San punches in the code of your apartment door. When it opens, a girl stands on the other side peering up at San with a shocked expression.

“Oh hey, It’s y/n boyfriend.” She smiles before turning to Wooyoung who, at the moment, keeps a straight face.

They had finally completed their 30 minute rant session, where she comes to him for help with her loneliness. Which was a topic to talk about for another time since Wooyoung felt like it wasn’t even his place to do it for her— also, considering he’s rejected her multiple times to be something more than her emotional support friend.

He never felt like a new relationship was something he needed.

As far as relationships are concerned, Wooyoung has enough on his plate to deal with considering the ugly truth he’s recently discovered. And of course, his unsettled feelings for his gorgeous ex.

“What are you doing back?” Wooyoung asks San, holding the door open for his emotionally unstable friend.

“Uh, coming to see my girlfriend??” San exchanges an offended glare at Wooyoung.

“Oh, I thought you already had your fill for her last night… What happened? Fell asleep before you could finish the job?” Wooyoung’s words are calm yet sharp like knives. Attacking San with precision as he tilts his head in accusation. “She’s out getting groceries.” He adds.

“You know,” San narrows his eyes, striding to level his face right in front of Wooyoung’s. “You have a lot of nerve thinking you can have any say in our relationship considering you’re her fucking ex.”

“We only broke up because I decided to switch colleges last minute without telling her.” Wooyoung doesn’t back down. He’s aware that his choice was the reason why the two of you broke up and that he should’ve told you sooner he wasn’t going to go to the same college as you guys had planned. “At least I never snuck out of bed after having sex with her.”

San scoffs at the gall. “Don’t act like you fucking know me.”

“I don’t.” Wooyoung shifts his weight and sticks his hands into his jean pockets. “But I know every part of y/n way better than you do. Every. Single. Part.”

San’s hand clenches into a fist and right before he draws it back to swing at Wooyoung. The girl awkwardly standing beside them in the threshold of the door raises her voice. “Hey, as much as I like the drama, I kind of have work so if I can just pass through…”

San doesn’t steer his eyes away from Wooyoung as he takes a step to the side for the girl to get around his body. Too peeved to realize that he was blocking the door.

“…I’ll see you later, Wooyoung. Thanks for helping me out again.” She waves before disappearing into the hall.

San huffs through his nose. It’s upsetting to him that Wooyoung doesn’t even seem the least bit affected by the situation. “Why aren’t you packing your shit? Isn’t this your last week?”

As if his train of thought derails, without even waiting for an answer to his own questions, San pushes past your ex and heads straight into your room.

Looking for what he left so recklessly before sneaking away that morning.

Wooyoung, with his hands still in his pockets, calmly follows San. Watching your boyfriend’s frantic search for whatever he’s misplaced.

Since Wooyoung respects your privacy, he stops right at the entrance of your room. “Did you wait for y/n to leave the apartment?”

“What the fuck are you talking about?” San tosses a pillow off your bed. Not sparing a single glance at your ex.

“I don’t know,” Wooyoung leans against the door. “I mean, if I had something to hide, I guess I’d want to wait until she was gone too.”

San stops completely. His heart drops to his stomach when he turns to your ex standing in front of your room. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

Wooyoung shrugs with a playful smirk etching onto his face as one of his hands pulls something out of his right pocket. “You tell me.”

There. What San was looking for.

His phone.

“Where did you find that!?” San yells as he practically dives for it.

“Ah, ah, ah.” Wooyoung shoves it back into his pocket. Placing his hand in front of himself defensively. “Question is, why are you so upset?”

San swallows and processes quickly before clearing his throat. He couldn’t understand why his palms were so sweaty. “It’s—Because it’s fucking mine! Hand it over!”

Wooyoung shakes his head, angling his body away from your boyfriend. “It can’t be yours.”

“Are you fucking mad?” San yells again. Smacking Wooyoung’s arm away from the position he’s guarding his pocket. “Of course, it is. It’s my phone!”

“No, no, no.” Wooyoung’s stupid, playful smile begins to boil hate into San’s veins. “This can’t be your phone.”

“I’ll drop kick that fucking smile off your face, you son of a bitch, give me back my phone!”

“Dude,” Wooyoung chuckles, loving how riled up your shitty boyfriend is getting. “I swear this phone has got to be someone else’s… because when I saw it on the couch, ringing at 4 am, someone named Eunji was calling to ask if her ‘daddy’ was still going to—and I’ll quote her on this, “Rearrange my guts like you always do on Saturday nights.” And you're telling me you’re certain that this is your phone?”

The reality settles into the air and San realizes that he’s been caught cheating on you… by your ex.

This is when Wooyoung’s twisted smirk turns into an angry scowl. He’s disgusted that you found a man so indisputably vile and unloyal.

“You really think you’ll get away with this? Lying to y/n like this and fucking her once every week just to make up for how shitty a person you are?”

San’s gaze falters to the floor and he snatches his phone from the unguarded pocket of Wooyoung’s jeans. “What are you gonna do, huh? Tattle-tail on me?” He shoves it into his back pocket, scoffing. “She’ll never believe you. She hates you.”

“Even if she does,” Wooyoung turns on his heels and enters into his room across the hall. “She’ll wish you were dead after figuring out that you leave her in the mornings just to be in some other woman’s bed the very same night.”

San follows Wooyoung a few steps into the hall. “You wouldn’t dare tell her.” He spits.

An exasperated sigh paired with the front door swinging open, startles the two men away from glaring at one another.

*********

After 30 minutes of shopping, you head home.

The entire time in the parking lot, you were gathering the courage to talk yourself into confidently walking back into your house. 

So what if he was having sex? You have sex all the time with San while Wooyoung stays in the room across the hall from yours.

How is coming back home knowing that he’s having fun with a woman be any different?

Equality at its best example for it. You remind yourself as you exit the elevator.

To your dismay, You were unpleasantly greeted by a very voluptuous woman with intruding questions as to why you were going to enter into her boyfriend’s home.

You push past the nuisance at your front door. Sighing as you lazily drop the groceries onto the floor.

You can only assume that this other girl— an entirely different girl compared to the one from this morning—is Wooyoung's little problem.

This boy must be cheating… What a waste. “Taste’s are constant” my ass.

You pray that Wooyoung’s ditsy girl toy from earlier this morning has left.  Though you liked witnessing drama, you didn’t want to see two girls fight over your ex. “Wooyoung? I think you have a guest.” You call out as you take off your shoes.

To your surprise, Your boyfriend is staring at you from the hallway— eyes wide and stunned.

Wooyoung steps out of his room to stand in the hall next to San. A flat smile sets on his features as he stares at you and eunji. “I won’t need to…” He seems to be talking to San when he speaks. “Next time, set a better password on your phone. You never know who’ll scroll through your messages and send people your girlfriend’s address.”

This confuses you. Immensely. More so, when San’s face drains of all color.

“Baby! Who the hell is this girl?” Miss voluptuous checks your shoulder as she rushes past you. Headed towards Wooyoung with her arms stretched out.

What rattles your world from it’s axis isn’t that Wooyoung doesn’t hold her, it’s that the girl doesn’t even look at him. She doesn’t even acknowledge that Wooyoung’s standing there.

Instead,

She’s all over your boyfriend. Calling him “baby’ and glaring at you as if you were nothing more than a disgusting insect.

No, no… I must be dreaming.

“Sannie, who the hell is this girl and why is she coming into your apartment?”

[ chapter 5 >> ] 

[illogicalthinking]

The Burn Within

warnings: Some NSFW language (Remus), blood/ bruises mention, hurt no comfort and self hatred 

word count: 1883

authors note: for this fic i used a prompt by @just-another-ts-prompt-blog which can be found: here 

hope you enjoy!

Whilst the ‘light’ and ‘dark’ sides preferred to keep their distance from each other, they had to share certain parts of Thomas’s mind. For example, they shared a common area, and the imagination was split into two separate realms, much like Roman and Remus: Whilst one contained multiple castles and kingdoms living in harmony with each other, the other was a prison of living nightmares. 

However, this arrangement did not bring them any closer to each other. The light sides tried to avoid the dark sides at all costs. Remus often played pranks on the others such as swapping the sugar out for salt, spiking drinks with inedible products, and stealing utensils. 

This made meal times extremely difficult to control: Virgil would hiss and hide, Patton would try and fail to diffuse the situation, Janus would watch in entertainment and Roman was never around to witness. The only side that could keep the sides from murdering each other was Logan. 

Today seemed like one of those days. 

“Virgil could you please come down from there, Remus did not do anything” Logan sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. It was far too early for this, Logan muttered to himself whilst taking a large sip of coffee from his “worlds best mum” mug. 

“He walked in whilst we were making coffee, that’s more than enough reason to hide. What if he put baby powder in my drink again? I’m going to die because of him!” Virgil hissed from his place on the top of the fridge, hoodie covering his frantic eyes. 

Virgil had been more paranoid than usual after the recent video. He had fallen back into his old habit of hissing at the other sides when stressed. It concerned Patton greatly. 

“Oh please sunshine, there is a higher chance of me fucking a woman with 3 arms than there is me spiking your drink again, I just walked in!” Remus exclaimed as he passed Virgil on the fridge to the dining table. 

“Whilst Remus vocalized his argument in a very unprofessional manner, he is right, we have been awake for approximately 1 hour and 15 minutes whereas, by the looks of it, Remus has only been awake for around 10 minutes.” Logan made sure to maintain eye contact with Virgil whilst voicing his opinion to ensure Virgil knows he’s telling the truth. “There is nothing to worry about Virgil, you are safe” 

“Thanks, L” 

“You're welcome, now please come down from there, it is very dangerous to be sitting in places you are not supposed to be sitting”

-

-

After the incident this morning between Virgil and Remus, Logan remained seated in the common room, his back straight against the recliner with his laptop placed on his lap. He was researching content for a Sanders side video they will be filming in the evening. He did not do this in his room due to not wanting another incident like this morning. Logan is the only side that is willing to deal with the incidents, while the other sides (particularly Janus and Roman) are too impatient and often make the situation worse. 

Throughout the whole day, Logan continued to research the link between intrusive thoughts and depression. Thomas had recently been showing signs of this mental illness and Logan wanted to bring it up to him via a video. However, there was a small issue, Logan would have to have all the other sides present including Janus and Remus. He needed Janus because Thomas listened to him more than Logan (much to the latter's dismay) and Remus represented intrusive thoughts. It would only be fair to have Remus take part in a discussion about him, even if the light sides had a problem with this. 

Happy with his research, Logan snapped his laptop shut. Due to none of the other sides entering the common room after this morning's incident, Logan concluded it was safe to retreat into his room because he was not needed to split up another argument yet.

To Logan's annoyance, it was time to film the video for Thomas' youtube channel. After the events of putting others first, Logan had started to dread taking part in videos. This was because Janus proved he could take his role as logic, and remain loved and respected whilst providing the necessary information Thomas needed. 

“Enough of the self-loathing, Logan, now is not the time,” Logan muttered to himself as he sank down into Thomas’s living room. This evening is going to be a long one for all of the sides, especially Logan. 

-

-

Logan didn’t know how much longer he could handle the arguing. 

None of the other sides were listening to his facts or solutions, too busy pinning the blame on each other for Thomas’s current problem. Roman and Remus were currently swords to mace, about to start a physical fight, Janus remained by Patton’s side trying and failing to calm him down before he turned back into a frog and Virgil remained curled up on his side, his hoodie covered the majority of him but Logan could still see him shaking. 

 Something had to shut them up.

I will shut them up, Logan thought to himself. Logan became alarmed by the sudden aggressive thoughts. He may have a short fuse but he wasn’t usually aggressive, not without guilt eating away at him. However, this time Logan had no guilt attached to this thought and he shivered at the realisation. 

This time was different he reminded himself and with that thought, Logan snapped

“Will you all shut up and listen to what I have to say for once!” Logan all but screamed at the top of his lungs, ensuring he was heard over the arguing. 

The silence that came after was enough evidence for logan to continue:

“People who suffer from depression often get stuck with a single or even several intrusive thoughts that arise frequently. These types of repetitive intrusive thoughts are known as 'rumination'.”

 “The whole point of me organising this stupid video was to bring this statement to Thomas’ attention and guide him with the help of Janus to seek professional help. You all arguing like a group of immature school children was not part of the script, now if you would excuse me I am going to make myself useful for once and leave” Logan huffed, glad to get that out of his system. Even after snapping, the guilt never choked him like it usually would, which disturbed him greatly.

“Logan, wait!”  Virgil pleaded, but it was too late.

“I said I was leaving, now fuck off and leave me alone” Logan hissed at him, the guilt still not reaching him.

Happy with this statement. Logan sunk out of the living room back to his room, leaving six shocked and petrified individuals behind.

“What just happened?” Thomas said to nobody in particular. 

“I do not know but it’s best to leave him alone, let’s just get this shit show over and done with” Virgil muttered, far too anxious about Logan to care about the video.

Logan what happened to you. Virgil thought. 

-

-

When Logan rose up into his bedroom he could not hold it in anymore. All of the pent-up frustration from being ignored for months became too much for the logical side, causing him to slam his fists into the nearest wall. However, without realizing it, Logan’s fist struck a family photo of all the sides surrounding a very happy Thomas. 

For some reason seeing the shattered photo frame on the floor and the glass sticking out of his broken skin caused something within him to break.

 For the first time in months, Logan allowed himself to cry out all of his frustrations. 

After what seemed like hours, Logan finally got up from his place on his bed. He noted that his eyes were swollen and his hand was covered in dry blood and bruises. He did not want to get up and clean his mistake, but he knew he had to because the others would ask questions and he did not want that. Logan did not want the other side’s sympathy. It was a little too late for them and Thomas to care about him but he had to stay because Thomas needed him. They needed him.

“Do they need you though, Logan? Come on, you’re just as useful as me right now and you know it.” A harsh voice sneered into the cold room. Logan immediately knew who it was. 

“Be quiet Orange, no matter how much Thomas tries to push me aside, I won’t leave because I am his logic, and Thomas needs his logical side. 

“Come on Logan deep down you know I am right, let me prove it to you”

“Let’s just say you were correct in your hypothesis, what happens after that?” Logan sneered. He was far too exhausted to deal with this right now, and he just wanted to sleep.

“Let me show you”

“If I trusted you I would be breaking trust with the others and Thomas and I cannot do that. Thomas’s welfare is my number one priority and I cannot cause any harm to them, no matter how much they have hurt me”

“Oh please Logan, Thomas has not given a shit about you since the beginning. Where is your video, Logan? All the other sides have an episode focused on them, even Remus! And Thomas hates the guy! Do something for yourself for once in your life and listen to me, I can make them listen to you but you have to trust me,” Orange whispered to Logan. Logan knew deep down that what orange was saying was correct, he did not just want to admit it to himself. Until now, that is.

“Fine, what do you have in mind?”

-

-

It has been approximately one hour since Logan had sunk out of the video, and Janus was getting worried. No matter how much he tried to get a hand on Logan and summon, he couldn’t. Logan was unreachable

The twins were arguing and Patton and Janus couldn't find a middle ground. Finally, they summoned Logan, needing an impartial side. But when he appears, something is different.

He was wearing a long-sleeve dress shirt, much fancier than usual. He had streaked eyeliner and his glasses were different. He was not wearing a tie.

“Logan? What happened?” Thomas asked, hesitant like he almost doesn’t want to know.

Patton had his hand to his mouth. He spoke up after a moment, “Logan, you look like… like a dark side. What did you do?”

Logan’s voice was quiet and soft like if he spoke too loud he might break. “I didn’t do anything. I didn’t try to do this, I-” he cut himself off, taking a deep, steadying breath. “I have become obsolete.” His voice broke on the last word and he clamped his mouth shut.

“No, Logan!” Thomas immediately disagreed. “We need Logic!”

Logan nodded, eyes still trained on the floor. “Yes, you do need logic. But . . . you don’t want me”

And with that, Logan sank out for the second time that night, leaving nothing but a cloud of smoke that soon vanished, just like he did.

The others could not do anything but feel the burn within. 

What had they done?