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bigtreefest · 5 months

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A What in Church?

Pairing: Ransom Drysdale x reader (can be read as a continuation of Meet The Parents or alone)

Summary: Ransom comes with you and your family to church…and then comes with you at church 🥴 (I’m sorry, but I had to)

Word count: 2,728

Content/warnings: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI, SMUT, near-fingering, p in v unprotected sex (pls, for the love of all that is holy, wrap it up), sex in front of a mirror, sex in a church😬, creampie, established relationship, swears, Ran is a sneaky li’l gaslighter but not towards you, lying in Church?, kissing, pet name usage, choking on one’s own saliva, implied female reader, li’l belly bulge

A/N: I hope God forgives me for thinking this up during church…

This is for the Cum Together: A Community Revival Extravaganza set up by @labella420 and @stargazingfangirl18 with the prompts of characters cum together at the same time and praise.

Dividers by @firefly-graphics

Main Masterlist

It was early Sunday morning when you dragged Ransom out of bed.

“Hugh Ransom Drysdale, come on. You have to get up. We’re already running late and I’m not dealing with disapproving looks from my parents for punctuality. It’s already bad enough every time the church ladies give me a side eye when I show up.”

He sighed as he rolled over in his high thread count sheets, the sunlight now hitting his face causing him to squint. He looked at you through one open eye as he made a light scowl.

“Sweetheart, come back to bed. It’s too early. I promise I’ll make it worth it.” A sly smirk crept onto his face as he reached out and pulled your hips closer to the bed.

You put a hand on his forehead, trying your best and failing to push him away. “Ransom, no. The only reason I stayed over was to make sure we got there on time. My parents think you’re picking me up right now and neither of us are even showered. If you get up now, maybe I��ll let you join me. Then we can get going.”

His arms snaked from your hips and around to give your ass a squeeze. “Hm….deal.” He rasped out in his groggy voice before shifting to get up.

“Whose idea was it to join your family at the 8am service of church this week, anyway?” Ransom threw the covers off the side of the bed in a mini tantrum before rising on his knees on the mattress to be face-to-face with you. You ran your fingers through his hair, slightly smoothing out the bed head before giving him a peck.

“Yours, baby. That’s what you get for trying to impress my mom.”

You fixed your makeup in the mirror of Ransom’s Beamer and smoothed down your baby blue linen dress after Ransom parked in the church parking lot. You turned to look at him as you straightened the collar of his shirt that peeked over his sweater.

“You look absolutely dapper. The church ladies are gonna love you. Probably enough for them to keep their judgy eyes off me. Now let’s just hope they don’t start asking my mom about a wedding date.” You grumbled the last part as you brushed imaginary dust off his shoulders before leaning back towards your own seat again and placing your hand on the door handle.

Ransom didn’t move a muscle as he sat there, leaning over the center console, with a look as deep at the ocean. That was weird. You’d expected him to have his cocky game face on, which he did, but his eyes showed something different.

“What? Is something wrong? Do I not look okay? Are you regretting agreeing to come along today?”

He sighed and shook his head before holding out his hand for yours. “No, you look heavenly. I am regretting sleeping in because if I wouldn’t have, maybe you would’ve actually let me touch you in the shower. I thought a shower with you meant with you, but you tricked me, you minx.”

You softly smiled at the beginning of his statement, placing your hand in his. As he kept going, you rolled your eyes before playfully shoving his shoulder. “Oh please. You and I both know you wouldn’t have gotten up for anything else. And if I would’ve let you touch me, we’d still be at your place.”

He shrugged before pulling you closer for a final kiss before heading in. It was the kind that left you breathless and speechless, and a little dizzy when he pulled away, but that could have been due to skipping breakfast, too. Your eyes were still closed when he spoke against your lips. “Don’t think you’re getting away with this that easily, though. Now stay here while I get your door. Gotta make sure the church ladies see me treating you well.”

Your jaw dropped as he gave you a smirk, fire rising in his gaze as he slipped out of the driver’s side and over to yours.

Ransom held your hand as he walked into the church, sliding into a pew near the back where your family had saved the two of you a seat. It was just in time for the service to begin. You were simultaneously filled with relief for not being late, but also anxiousness. You knew that when he held that look in his eye, Ransom was up to no good.

If someone had asked you what you’d gathered from the sermon so far, your answer would be ‘jack shit.’ You were too focused on Ransom, and the way his hand was creeping up your leg as he stared straight ahead. He looked enthralled by whatever the preacher was dragging on and on about, but you knew better from the way his lips curled just slightly at the corners and his ringed pinky finger was sliding under the hem of your dress. The cool metal gave you chills. Your breath hitched, just as you were salivating, imagining what Ransom could possibly have in store for you. Unfortunately, that didn’t make for a good combination, as you choked on your own saliva.

You tried your hardest to hold in your coughs, eyes watering, until you couldn’t take it anymore. They burst out of you and the sound of your coughs, one after another, echoed through the nearly silent room as you scrambled to get up and into the hallway. Ransom shot your parents a sympathetic look before wordlessly gesturing that he was going to check up on you. They nodded in response, glad you had found someone so caring and responsible.

You burst through the doors at the back of the room with Ransom hot on your heels. You fast walked into the family restroom and Ransom slipped in behind you. He locked the door and made his way to your hunched over form, your arms bracing you against the sink as you continued coughing and heaving, trying to catch your breath. Ransom rubbed your back in soothing circles until you took a final gasp for air and looked up at his reflection in the mirror with a scowl.

“You did this. This is your fault, Mr. Handsy.” It came out with the slightest rasp. Ransom’s face morphed from slight concern into suggestion. Now that he had made sure you were okay, he was more than happy to have you exactly where he wanted you all along: alone.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’m not the one out there snorting my spit. I could probably successfully swallow, unlike you.” He knew exactly what he was doing. He was trying to rile you up so you’d give in to him now since you didn’t earlier this morning. You’d never outwardly crumble that easily, though. Where was the fun in that?

“First off, you should be the one to know I’m great at swallowing. And secondly, if you believe you did nothing wrong, I think we should find you a neurologist for those wandering hands. Maybe the rings are causing nerve damage and cutting off the feeling in your fingertips.” Ransom couldn’t help but let out a small chortle at that. Good one, babe. But he knew what could push you a little farther. He knew how much you really did love the way his hands wandered, even if you’d say otherwise. He could tell right now even, as he shifted to stand behind you, soft fingertips tracing up the front of your thighs and under your flowy dress. His hand was in between your thighs, creeping dangerously close to your cotton panties. He used his grip to pull you back against him, eyes never leaving yours in the mirror.

“Oh honey, I don’t have to be able to feel my fingers to know how good they make you feel.” He ran his fingers over the dampening fabric as your breath hitched. Finally.

His grin grew wide as he slipped his pinky finger under the gusset of your panties and pulled it to the side, exposing your glistening folds to the cool air.

You hissed at the sensation as Ransom began running a finger through your wetness. If you were anywhere else but a church bathroom, he would have worked to pull even louder sounds from you than the tiny breaths and moans you were already making, but that’s not something that could be afforded right now. As his one hand continued to tease your entrance, the other moved to cover your mouth.

“Quiet, Sweetheart. You make a noise and I stop. Don’t want anyone to find out what’s going on in here.” You nodded in acknowledgment and Ransom was satisfied with that response, kissing your temple that was collecting a thin shimmer from sweat already. Just as he was about to dip a finger in, though, the two of you heard music start. That meant service was almost over. They would play a few songs, and then everyone would rush out the doors, making it impossible for the two of you to leave the bathroom undetected and unsuspected of what was going on right now.

Ransom didn’t waste a second, though, pulling his hands off you to unzip his slacks and pull them down just low enough. His eyes locked in on yours in the mirror again, deep blue irises thin around lust and mischief-blown pupils.

“Sorry, sweetie. Don’t have time to prepare you. But you can handle that, right?” You didn’t have a chance to reply this time, as his hand found it’s place over your mouth again at the same time he fully sheathed himself within you.

The little squeak you made into Ransom’s hand when you were trying to hold back was music to his ears. Oooo, he liked that. He was gonna make sure to do whatever he could in the future so you’d make it again, but he didn’t have the time for it right now.

His hand that wasn’t over your mouth snaked to your tummy from where it was gripping your hip. Ransom could just barely feel the bulge pushing against your softness with each thrust and it drove him wild, as he sped up his thrusts and babbled into your ear.

“Yeah you can. You can take it. Look at you. Taking this so well. Being so good for me. I’d say you were an angel if we weren’t fucking like two whores in church right now.”

His vulgar words always did something to you, causing your eyes to roll back and your pussy to clench. That was Ransom’s favorite, especially when he found it out that his sharp tongue was something you actually enjoyed and rewarded him for, instead of punished. Despite his hand on your mouth, you were still working hard to keep yourself quiet, only letting out a low moan in response.

“Fuck, so good. So, gah-tight. You’re so perfect. I’m gonna take my hand off, okay? You gotta keep it down and I promise I’ll make you feel good.” You gripped harder against the sink as Ransom removed his hand, using it to hike your leg up on the edge of the counter, his hand that was previously on your stomach moving to rub your clit.

You gasped for air, before moving your own hand to your mouth. If you were at home, moans and curses would’ve been profusely spilling out of your mouth with how near your were to the tipping point. Ransom’s grunts in your ear we’re pulling you even closer to the edge when he licked your neck, the sweet taste of your perfume mixed with salty sweat hitting his tongue, and the debauchery of the gesture tossing you over the edge of your orgasm. Your knee gave out as you came, Ransom’s strong arms holding you up against the sink as you felt him swell and release in you at the same time, still rubbing your clit and shallowly thrusting for both of you to come down from your highs.

“That’s it. That’s it, sweetheart.” His breath was hot against your neck, but you were both pulled out of the post-orgasmic bliss by the sound of the music changing. The last song of service was playing and within a few minutes, everyone would be emerging into the hall.

Ransom pulled out of you faster than he had before, both of you moaning with oversensitivity and the abruptness of the action. You gained composure on your jelly legs before pulling your panties back into place and doing your best to fix your makeup in the mirror. Luckily, the smudges could be attributed to your coughing fit earlier, but Ransom’s rogue hairs that had flown forward and stuck to his forehead couldn’t. You quickly pushed them back into a decent position and straightened his collar before rushing into the hallway and taking a seat at an old pew that was next to a table with water bottles and cookies on it, set out for the social hour that always happened after service. Ransom grabbed a bottle and quickly chugged it down halfway, handing it to you just as the last song was ending.

“Here, hunch forward like you’re still recovering. And take this.” He was too good at convincing people of the scenes they had walked into. But how could you complain when it had gotten you out of trouble with the cops more times than you could count? Including after the two of you had been parked somewhere a little too long having car sex, or when he had driven just a little too recklessly while fingering you in the passenger seat. He always knew exactly how to manipulate the scene in his favor, convincing others to not believe their own eyes, but the stories he presented them instead. But he didn’t do it to you, never to you. He learned that the hard way, it’s better to be honest and do it with you. You were his teammate, who better to use his skills for than the one he loved? Bring it up though, and he’d deny it.

So you and Ransom sat there, your elbows on your knees and him rubbing circles on your back with his large, warm palm. Sure, it was performative, but it was also extremely comforting and reassuring, especially with the way he just rocked your world in the bathroom.

The church-goers began to file out of the double doors and into the hall. You looked up through your eyelashes to be greeted by your parents. They looked at you with confusion and a hint of concern when your dad crouched in front of you and your mom sat next to Ransom.

“Everything alright?” Your dad looked up into your eyes and you managed a nod, taking a sip from the water bottle and clearing your throat.

“Yeah, sorry about that. Got into a coughing fit and couldn’t shake it. Much better now.”

Ransom heard the clarity with which you spoke. If he really wanted to be convincing, he should’ve had you suck him off. There wasn’t really the time for that, though. As much as he loved watching your lips wrapped around him, he came way faster inside you, and how could he allow for the evidence of scuffs on your knees when you were wearing such a pretty dress? Maybe next time, when you were in jeans.

Ransom was pulled out of his thoughts when your mom and dad spoke, thanking him for checking up on you.

“Oh no problem, don’t worry, I took good care of your girl. I always will.”

They smiled, and must’ve believed the scene in front of them, as the topic swiftly changed to what they wanted for brunch plans. Ransom met your gaze, giving a quick wink for only you to see before kissing the top of your head and giving his input to the conversation.

That was the last you saw of him for half an hour, though, as the church ladies descended, squeezing themselves between the two of you, oohing and ahhhing over your sly boyfriend. Every now and then, as they’d ask him a tidal wave of questions, his eyes would seek you, full of fire, secrecy, and love, paired with that signature smirk on his face.

Bonus A/N: I think something that this extravaganza has taught me is that I have a thing for mirrors….and that scares me. It’s so hot in fics, and sure, every time I walk past a mirror in real life, I’ve been told I stop, but I wasn’t aware of what a dangerous combination that made until now. Lord save me, but he’s probably too angry at me now bc I wrote this.

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rory-cakes · 6 months

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The Crew! Part 1!

A series of Incorrect quotes with Birdy!reader and the Hazbin Crew!

Birdy: I would never say that my partner is a bitch and I don’t don’t like them. That’s not true… My partner is a bitch and I like them so much!

*Part 5 essentially*

Alastor: Pros and cons of dating me.

Alastor: Pros. You'll be the cute one.

Alastor: Cons. Holy shit, where do I begin-

Angel: Bonjour, Husk. Voulez–vous coucher avec moi?

Husk: No, I don't want to sleep with you.

Angel: Is that what that means? Oh, man, I had a really gross tennis instructor.

Vaggie: You look like a corpse that was just pulled out of the river.

Angel: Wrong. I look like a cool rock star who just OD'd in his own pool. Big difference.

Lucifer to Charlie: Stop saving the world and get a hobby.

Husk: Is this gaslighting? Am I being gaslit?

Alastor: If I were gaslighting you, you’d never know it.

Husk: Is THAT gaslighting?

Alastor: Shut up.

Birdy, teaching Charlie to drive: Okay Charlie, what does a green light mean?

Charlie: Go!

Birdy: A red light?

Charlie: Stop!

Birdy: And what about a yellow light?

Charlie: If you floor it, you can make it!

Birdy: …No—

Angel: As someone who has a long history of not understanding anything, I feel confident in my ability to continue not knowing what is going on.

Alastor: Alright, listen up you little shits.

Alastor: Not you Birdy. You’re an angel and we’re thrilled you’re here.

*Squad is playing Among Us*

Lucifer: I believe Vaggie is innocent, I was with them the whole time. Alastor, what were you doing?

Alastor: Oh, I was just murdering… I mean, nothing!

Vaggie: What's this?

Chalie, hugging Vaggie: Affection!

Vaggie: Disgusting.

Vaggie: ...Do it again.

Vaggie: Any idiot would know that.

Nifty: I knew that!

Vaggie: See?

Lucifer: I don’t think the therapist is supposed to say ‘wow’ that many times during their first session with a client, but here we are.

Charlie: We’re kind of missing something guys.

Angel: Cohesion?

Vaggie: Teamwork?

Husk: A general sense of what we’re doing?

Lucifer: And Birdy is not here.

Husk: Oh, and that, yeah.

Lucifer: I hate you with every inch of my body!

Alastor: That’s not a lot of inches.

*in a group chat*

Angel: First one to reply is gat.

Angel: *gay

Angel: Wait...

Birdy: *eating a cinnamon roll*

Everyone: Cannibalism.

Birdy: *confused chewing noises*

Angel: Here’s the cold medicine you asked for.

Husk: *dumps 3 shopping bags of wine on the table*

Birdy: ...Thanks.

Birdy: Don't break someone's heart, they only have one.

Alastor: Break one of their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

A/n: Hope You enjoyed!!

Taglist: @crazed-flower, @nanamunath, @preferably-fictional, @eccedentesiast-sapphic, @leximus98, @cupidsgift, @mag-chan, @stygianoir, @thereeallink, @yelloeukulele, @mariaclarade-la-cruz1, blurpleuni-squid, @galaxywing-has-adhd, @just-here-reading, @deez-nuts0, @strawberry-gothic, @purplerose291,@1-800-mocha, @trashbin-nie, @queenmizuki, @nkirukaj @bennythebitch @otherthoughtsofbu, @fantasycantasy, @hunnybee11626, @notally-tormal, @valerie-36, @lovingyeet, @holographicage, @har-har-harvey, @i-love-jafar, @cupidsgift, @meow-meowo, @theblueslytherin, @deadt3tinside, @lyralibra, @the-unhinged-raccoon, @avitute, @alastorswifeee, @stygianoir, @sideshow-b0b, @deadlymouse123, @mysingularitybts, @emotionalfangirl2002, @t0xic1vi, @goodlittlepup, @starsatmyhome, @wendds, @reader3, @redfoxgotlost, @hurthermore, @frostychurro, @isa-dragon, @makandcheese04, @sassypeiceofshit, @kenzi-woycehoski, @otherthoughtsofbu

#hazbin hotel #x reader #x reader fic #hazbin hotel x reader #alastor x reader #hazbin alastor #alastor altruist #alastor hazbin hotel #alastor the radio demon #alastor #alastor x you #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor x angel!reader #alastor x wife reader #alastor x y/n

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diorsluv · 8 months

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feather , part 30

“ you want me? ”

series m. list previous chapter next chapter

( socialmedia!au )

yourusername

liked by luca.fantilli, lhughes_06, colecaufield, and 177,258 others

yourusername my kind of love 🥂💗

view all comments

mackie.samo MY KIND OF LOOOOOOVEEEEE

→ yourusername PUSH ME AND CHOKE ME TIL I PASS OUTTTT

→ markestapa WE DONT GOTTA BE IN LOVE NOOOO

→ dylanduke25 I DONT GOTTA BE THE ONE NOOOO

→ edwards.73 I JUST WANNA BE ONE OF YOUR GIRLS TONIGHTTTTT

→ _quinnhughes is this a song reference

→ mackie.samo 😦 quinnhughes

→ yourusername 😦 quinnhughes

→ markestapa 😦 quinnhughes

→ dylanduke25 😦 quinnhughes

→ edwards.73 😦 quinnhughes

username74 THAT’S LITERALLY THE BOAT??

trevorzegras did he pay for the vinyls and the starbucks

→ yourusername yes he’s my sugar daddy 😋

→ trevorzegras i mean i could be too 🙊🙊

→ yourusername jump off a bridge

→ trevorzegras IM JOKING IM JOKING

lhughes_06 man you’ve been spending a lot of time w ur bf

→ yourusername i think it’s bc i like him a lot but idk

markestapa would you like to explain that 2nd pic

→ yourusername no i would not 😁😁

→ rutgermcgroarty i don’t think any explaining is necessary..

→ luca.fantilli if she explained that photo i’d blow my phone up

→ lhughes_06 she was obviously just showing her bf a lot of love

→ mackie.samo i’m sure she was…… lhughes_06

username42 luke posted himself at a record store on his story…

→ username31 why are we acting like we don’t know they’re dating

username8 are you gaslighting us or are you dating different people

adamfantilli i recognize those hands

→ yourusername oh!

→ rutgermcgroarty so you admit to your hand kink

→ adamfantilli I DON’T HAVE A FUCKING HAND KINK

→ yourusername it’s okay baby fants me too

→ trevorzegras lil drizzy you too????

→ dylanduke25 AHEM lhughes_06 AHEM

→ lhughes_06 what

→ lhughes_06 oh

→ lhughes_06 OH

username45 the boat…

→ username94 it’s the hughes’ right?!?!?!

colecaufield how cute you’re gazing at the sunset together

→ yourusername so aesthetic right 🥰

→ colecaufield oh… that’s not…

_quinnhughes please get married already

→ yourusername woah there quinny don’t u think we’re moving a little too fast

→ _quinnhughes no he really likes you

→ lhughes_06 yeah i agree i think your boyfriend really likes you

jamie.drysdale if you’re gonna post something like this then at least put a tw 😒😒

→ yourusername ‼️TW‼️ my jumpscare of a brother just commented!! 😱

→ jamie.drysdale i will strangle you

→ yourusername love you too

→ jamie.drysdale dad said i’m the favorite

→ yourusername i have blackmail don’t make me use it

username56 please i can do better than him 🙏

_alexturcotte that necklace looks a little too familiar…

→ yourusername turcs babe you know 😭😭

→ _alexturcotte but you told me to play along

→ yourusername i didn’t mean like that but you know it’s okay i appreciate the effort

→ _alexturcotte okay 😞

jackhughes you know our walls aren’t soundproof right

→ yourusername wait

→ luca.fantilli HUH 😟

→ mackie.samo WHAT WERE THEY DOING 😨

→ edwards.73 LMAOOOO

→ markestapa damn lil drizz i didn’t know you were like that 😰😰

→ yourusername NO NO WE WEREN’T DOING ANYTHING

→ jackhughes my ears say otherwise yourusername

→ yourusername WE WERE PLAYING GAMES THAT’S ALL

→ _quinnhughes apparently jack heard a lot of screaming…

→ yourusername NO NO IT’S BECAUSE HE WOULDN’T HELP ME

→ rutgermcgroarty ur untrustworthy

→ adamfantilli ya nasty 🙄🙄

→ lhughes_06 🙉🙉

username76 that whole thread under jack’s comment is horrifying

lhughes_06

liked by yourusername, jackhughes, _alexturcotte, and 195,585 others

lhughes_06 my girl, talkin bout my girl 🤗

view all comments

username46 THEY BOTH QUOTED SONG LYRICS

username12 oh my god is that the eiffel tower in the background DID HE TAKE HER TO PARIS

edwards.73 oh god she turned you into a softie

→ lhughes_06 nothing wrong with that 😞

→ edwards.73 i’m waiting for the day she talks you into letting her do a full face of makeup on you

→ lhughes_06 …

→ edwards.73 BRO

trevorzegras MY GIRLLLLLL

→ lhughes_06 TALKIN BOUTTTT MYYY GIRLLLL

→ trevorzegras who put u on good music like that cuz i sure as hell only know ONE person who avidly listens to that song…

→ lhughes_06 lips are sealed 🤐

→ yourusername well they obviously can’t be THAT sealed because the whole group chat knows 🙄

→ trevorzegras what group chat..

→ lhughes_06 oops

username89 another day another post that makes me want to throw my phone away

username23 now who did you force to be the photographer

→ lhughes_06 mr mark estapa

markestapa i’m waiting for my photo creds

→ lhughes_06 keep waiting stay mad

→ markestapa fuckin middle school type comeback

_quinnhughes mom’s asking when you’re going to propose

→ lhughes_06 good lord what is with you and telling unmarried couples to get married

→ _quinnhughes she’s been like a little sister since we were kids so you might as well make it legal

→ jackhughes fr

→ lhughes_06 you’re just so helpful jack

jamie.drysdale oh my god my eyes

→ lhughes_06 ik ur gonna be the brother in law but 🙄🙄

this reply has been deleted

→ lhughes_06 🙄

→ jamie.drysdale you’re not slick little boy

→ lhughes_06 little boy is crazy

username78 this shit is gonna end with me on my death bed

luca.fantilli G R O S S

→ lhughes_06 your face is gross

→ luca.fantilli your gf is gross

→ lhughes_06 HEY DONT CALL HER GROSS

→ luca.fantilli WHY NOT

→ lhughes_06 she’ll get very mad at you

adamfantilli disgusting

→ lhughes_06 did you both just collectively decide to berate me

→ _quinnhughes please for the love of god do not bring collectively back

→ adamfantilli we’ve all collectively decided to bring collectively back _quinnhughes

mackie.samo now luke…

→ lhughes_06 yes? 😘

→ mackie.samo just because you’re in a happy, healthy, loving relationship where there’s mutual communication DOESN’T FUCKING MEAN WE ALL ARE

→ lhughes_06 🖕

→ mackie.samo no IT SHOULD BE ME DOING THAT 🖕

rutgermcgroarty that bleach on my counter is lookin real scrumptious

→ lhughes_06 do it i dare you

→ rutgermcgroarty oh

→ yourusername LUKE 😭😭

→ lhughes_06 WHAT

→ yourusername APOLOGIZE DUMBASS

→ lhughes_06 i want to express my sincere apologies for any confusion or discomfort that may have arisen from my responses. i recognize the importance of clear communication, and it is never my intention to cause any frustration. i appreciate your understanding and patience as i strive to assist you. if there are specific instances or areas where my responses fell short, please provide feedback so i can address them accordingly. your satisfaction is of utmost importance, and i am committed to improving and ensuring a better experience for you. thank you for your understanding, and please let me know how i can better serve you. rutgermcgroarty

→ rutgermcgroarty i know you used chatgpt 😃

yourusername moose i don’t mean to state the obvious but.. i think she likes you

→ lhughes_06 really? i couldn’t tell 😞

→ markestapa my god

→ colecaufield nahhhhh 😨

→ _quinnhughes was not obvious whatsoever

username91 WHAT WILL IT TAKE FOR YOU TO TELL US

username47 i need this relationship

next chapter notes ) yall yall i know i’m updating every two days but i’m tryna make sure they’re long enough to be entertaining.. maybe you’ll like the next chapter maybe you won’t 🫢

tags: @aliaology @hockeyboysarehot @absolutelyhugh3s @jackquinnswife @freds-slut @love4ldr @blueeyedbesson @43hughes @v1olentdelights @dancerbailey3 @random-human02 @ho3forfakeguys @loveforaugust @cstads-blog @h0e4fictionalme-n

#luke hughes x y/n #luke hughes x reader #luke hughes #luke hughes fanfic #luke hughes fic #jack hughes #quinn hughes #alex turcotte #cole caufield #trevor zegras #jamie drysdale #ethan edwards #mark estapa #dylan duke #mackie samoskevich #adam fantilli #rutger mcgroarty #luca fantilli

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hamiltonaf · 1 year

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Expecting the Unexpected | Kylian Mbappé

Pairing: Kylian Mbappé x Female Reader

Requested: Anonymous

Word Count: 1.8K

Warnings: Angst but turns into fluff / Kind of smutish towards the end / Cursing if you squint.

A/N: Thanks to anon for requesting. Currently working on other requests so hopefully they will be posted soon. Hope you guys enjoy .xoxo

2 years of marriage. It went by very quickly but gosh it annoys me being asked that one question since the day we were married. When are you guys having a baby ?

Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love kids and of course I want to see Kylian being a dad, but the idea of having a baby right now at the age of 23 wasn’t part of my plan. Studying a post graduate degree isn’t easy and especially going to work in between. I’ve heard it countless of times to drop work and studying because Kylian is there for me, but all I really want is independence and not having to hear one day that I used Kylian.

As family oriented as I am, I’ve come to a point where I try to avoid meeting any family - my own included - just to avoid being asked the dreaded question. I hate the idea that straight after getting married, all that’s left is to have kids… why can’t married couples enjoy their life for a few years at least before growing their family ?

Since Kylian’s season was over, my mother-in-law had invited Kylian and I for dinner. I was willing to go for dinner since I haven’t seen my in-laws in a while, but my mood turned sour when my boss instructed me that I needed to stay behind and do corrections to my work that was apparently incorrect.

Kylian had texted me asking me where I was and I replied back apologising that I won’t make it to dinner because my boss was holding me back to do extra work. He left me on read.

The corrections drove me insane because I did as I was told to do, but yet my boss gaslighted me saying that he told me to do something else. Asshole. I left work 2 hours later and went straight home, not knowing if Kylian was back from dinner or if he was still with his family.

As soon as I unlocked the door, I dropped my keys on the kitchen counter along with my bag. I could hear the TV playing and walked my way to the lounge. “Oh you’re here. Sorry I missed dinner. My boss was being such an ass and gaslighted me saying-“ “Save it” he cut me off as he continued to watch the TV. “Excuse me ? What do you mean save it ? I literally told you that my boss was holding me back to do extra work, I didn’t have a choice !” I raised my voice as I walked around the couch to stand in front of him with folded arms. His ‘don’t-care’ attitude was driving me insane, he literally had the audacity to continue watching TV.

“Kylian. I had a long day and the last thing I want is for us to argue” I toned down my voice. “I’m so done making excuses for you” he said as he finally met my gaze. “What excuse ? You didn’t even give me a chance to finish ! I was saying that my boss gaslighted me into thinking I did the wrong work when I literally followed his instructions. He held me back because he wanted me to correct it” I started to grow annoyed. “Lies lies and more lies. Just admit it (Y/N), you didn’t want to come to dinner because you’re worried about them asking you when we’re going to be parents. Do you know how embarrassing it is for me ? Our relationship looks so one sided” he raised his voice as he stood up and towered me.

“One sided ? You know that’s a lie. Also, enlighten me on how it’s embarrassing for you when I’m the one who’s expected to carry our child, not you ! So do tell me how you’re the one under pressure” I raised my brows. “How do I answer my mum when she asks me when will she be a grandmother ? What do you want me to say ? Oh don’t expect to be a grandmother any time soon because (Y/N) isn’t interested in having a child !” He yelled in my face.

“I- you know what, I can’t continue this conversation any further” I said calmly as possible before walking away from him. “No, we’re not done talking. Why do you keep running away from your problems ?” He asked as he followed me. “Can you just shut up ! Ugh !” I groaned as I walked to our room. With all my built up frustration and stress, I could feel tears start to pool at my eyes.

“(Y/N) answer me !” He said as I came to a halt. I looked up in hopes of getting rid of my tears, but the second I turned to look at Kylian the tears threatened to spill. His look softened when he saw the tears run down my face. He stepped closer and cupped my cheeks. “I’m sorry ma chérie” he said as he wiped my tears away with the pad of his thumb. I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths to try, and calm down. I walked away from him and walked to our en suite to lock myself in the bathroom.

He started knocking on the door and calling out,“Ma chérie, I’m so so sorry. Please forgive me. I hate fighting with you and seeing you cry. I’m just so frustrated from being asked the same question over and over.” I don’t know what came over me but I couldn’t stop crying to myself. I was so focused on my thoughts and emotions that Kylian’s words were inaudible.

After a minute the door had suddenly burst open. I looked up in shock to Kylian as he rushed to my side and pulled me in for a hug. “Please don’t scare me like that” he said softly. I wiped away my tears with the back of my hand and turned to look at him. “Are you crying ?” I asked as I half smiled. He nodded as I wiped away his tears. “Please talk to me. Tell me what’s going on. I hate being left in the dark, I don’t know what else to tell our family. Why can’t we have a baby ?” He asked.

“I love you Ky. I really do…but having a child after 2 years of being married wasn’t part of my family planning” I pouted. He pressed his lips together as a sign for me to continue.

He remained silent for me to get to my point. “Ky, if I barely spend time with you, why would I even think of us having a child right now ? I won’t lie that at times I did think that maybe us being parents would change things for the better but I kept holding back because I have too much on my hands right now” I said as I avoided his gaze. “Babe, then why don’t you drop studying and working ? Why put yourself through so much when I can be the one to provide for you and our baby” he said as he brushed a strand of hair away from my face. “It’s easy for you to say but I just happen to enjoy being independent. It’s how I’ve always been growing up, besides that, the last thing I want to hear is people calling me a gold digger or user blah blah. I didn’t marry you for your money, I married you because I love you” I pouted.

He broke into a smile as he cupped my cheeks and pulled me in for a sweet kiss. “Please don’t worry about what other people think. What’s mine is yours…I love you so so much. I’m sorry again for snapping at you, besides being asked that question so many times, I myself had questioned when will the day come that we’ll have our own mini us” he smiled at the thought. “I know you said that we barely spend time together, I’ll also take the blame for not spending more time with you when there were times that I could’ve made the effort. Again, I’m sorry for not being the greatest husband, I’ll try to do better” he said as he held my hands and rubbed small circles with his thumb.

“Please stop apologising. You’ve been such an amazing husband to me. I know this whole thing got blown out of proportion, we should have had this conversation sooner” I sighed as I pulled him along with me to sit at the edge of our bed. “I agree, but don’t feel pressured into doing anything. I get it” he said as he held my face with one hand. “This timing is really bad but I don’t think I can keep it a secret any longer. I’m pregnant” I pressed my lips together. “Stop playing with me babe” he half laughed. “Ky I’m serious. I’m pregnant. You’re going to be a dad !” I squealed.

“Wait. Really ?” He asked again. I nodded my head as he then screamed and jumped up whilst punching his hands in the air. Once again he cupped my cheeks and placed his lips on mine. He then lifted me up and spun us around the room. “I can’t explain to you how happy I am ! Why didn’t you tell me sooner and when did you find out ?” He asked eagerly.

“I found out about 2 days ago. I did a test because my period was late for about 2 weeks and I thought it was just one of those moments where it’s rarely late, I don’t know what made me take a test and a few minutes later I found out. I was planning to do a whole cute reveal for you but like I said, everything had gotten blown out of proportion. You didn’t know this, but I was actually looking forward to coming to dinner, I thought I could reveal it tonight just amongst our immediate family but then I was genuinely upset by my boss” I half smiled. “Oh no. Now I feel even more terrible. Babe I really am so sorry I just-“ I cut him off by grabbing his face and connecting our lips together.

Our lips moved in sync as he walked backwards to the edge of the bed. “Stop apologising” I said as I straddled his lap and broke away from our kiss. “I can’t believe we’re going to be parents. I can’t wait to be a dad. More especially, I can’t wait to see you grow and carry our baby. You’re already so sexy, I don’t know how I’ll contain myself seeing you from now on. I say that this calls for a celebration” he smirked. “I was hoping you’d say something like that” I wrapped my arms around his neck and closed the gap between us.

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anogtsamsfan · 6 months

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NS!AU incorrect quotes

Star: *Laughs* Eclipse, you had a crush on me? That’s embarrassing—

Eclipse : We’re married.

Moon, Solar and Eclipse : *screaming*

Earth: *runs into the room* What's wrong, Solar?!

Moon: Wait, why are you asking Solar that when Eclipse and I are also here?

Earth: Because Solar wouldn't scream unless it's an emergency. You two scream whenever you have the chance.

Earth: So you’re dating Solar?

Ruin: What? No! I’m just buying them an accessory since they have terrible fashion sense.

Earth: That’s literally a wedding ring.

Earth: I assume you realize that this kind of idiocy will not be tolerated in this house.

Ruin: Is there any kind of idiocy you would be more comfortable with?

Ruin: Is this gaslighting? Am I being gaslit?

Puppet: If I were gaslighting you, you’d never know it.

Ruin: Is THAT gaslighting?

Puppet: Shut up.

Solar, very tired: Can I sleep in your bed?

Ruin: *half asleep* Solar , this is a queen-sized bed. That means it’s for *gestures vaguely to themself* the Queen.

Earth: I am the sand guardian, guardian of the sand.

Eclipse: Puppet quivers before them!

Earth: Fuck off!

Sun: Words ending in 'ie' just sound so adorable. Like cutie, sweetie, cookie-

Puppet: Eyy, homie!

Moon: But then there's cootie...

Earth: Die.

Lunar: how do you ask someone out?

Ruin: Well, first-

Solar: Don't ask them, they asked me out in a McDonalds parking lot.

Lunar: ...And you said yes?

Solar and Ruin: *Plays Slender: The Eight Pages*

*Jumpscare*

Ruin: *Jumps back* OH S*IT, IT'S A WHITE GUY!!!

Puppet: Earth doesn’t look very happy.

Solar: That's their happy. They're just a b*tch.

Lunar, to Puppet: If you see Pollux, give them this message *makes a neutral face*

Lunar: They'll know what it means.

*later*

Puppet: oh, and Lunar said to give you a message.

Puppet: *makes a neutral face*

Pollux: Oh no- The neutral face of displeasure.

Lunar : So don't panic but one of us is possessed by an owl....

Eclipse: ....

Solar: .....

Puppet: ......

Star: ..Who?

Lunar : That's the thing we don't-

*Everyone stares at Star*

Eclipse : Hey, can we stay in your house tonight?

Solar: Why?

Eclipse : Puppet fiddled with an ouija board and cursed ours.

Puppet: Earth doesn't know how to banish spirits, so they just throw salt at them and yell "DOES THIS LOOK LIKE A HOTEL TO YOU?!"

*The Squad using an Ouija board*

Puppet: Tell us… Is there a spirit in this house?

Spirit, through the board: YES.

Puppet: Great! Rent is due on the first of the month.

Eclipse: Oh, and movie night is on Friday if you want to hang out.

Earth: WAIT, WHAT—

Eclipse : What can therapy do for me that screaming in my car for 30 minutes can’t?

Earth: make you talk to people.

Pollux : Lunar, what does IDK, ILY, and TTYL mean?

Lunar: I don’t know, I love you, talk to you later.

Pollux : Alright, I love you too, I'll ask Castor.

Lunar: Wait- Pollux , no-

Pollux: I was voted “friendliest classmate” in high school.

Ruin: I was voted “most likely to become a clown”…

Lunar: You think that’s bad? HA! I was voted “most likely to get rabies”!

Castor: When I was your age-

Earth, mocking Castor: When I was your height.

Castor: . . .

Castor: Listen here you little s*it-

#tsams #tsams au #the sun and moon show #tsams eclipse #tsams solor #tsams AU Star #tsams oc #tsams lunar #Tsams sun #tsams moon #tsams earth #tsams pollux #tsams castor #mgafs puppet #Tsams ruin #ruin x solar #star x eclipse #lunar x pollux

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waiting4inspiration · 1 year

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Дорогая Epilogue (The Winter Soldier/Bucky x Reader)

Summary: Months have now passed and things are getting easier. Until the team finally shows up in a late, almost unwanted rescue.

Warnings: +18 content, MDNI, dark content, angst, small fluff, Stockholm syndrome, manipulation, gaslighting, strong language, end of the series, did I write this with the possibility of a sequel series; yes I did, will that sequel happen; probably not

Word Count: 977

дорогая Masterlist II Marvel Masterlist

Things slowly got better as the months went on. You slowly learned how to deal with your new type of life, and things fell into a kind of routine. You cared for the house and for Bucky and you saw little of the Winter Soldier. Bucky would make sure that there is everything you two need in the house, food and other supplies. And sometimes, if you were good, he’d take you with him to the store in town as a way to get you out and about.

Sometimes you felt that no one would believe you if you told them of your situation. You don’t even want to tell them, fearing that you might release the Winter Soldier on them. Even though you’re not an Avenger anymore, you still want to protect people as much as you can.

Some days, you forget how you ended up here. But the cabin starts to feel like home and that is how you treat it. Bucky allows you to change things, redecorate how you feel, and plant a few plants out front to make the cabin look more appealing. It also gives you something to do during the day.

As you trim the leaves of a plant, you find yourself smiling to yourself. It’s nice not having the feeling of responsibility of the world in your hands, fighting against threats to protect billions of people. You don’t have to worry about missions going wrong and the possibility of dying. Life is carefree, you tell yourself. And it makes you happy.

The sound of a car pulling up makes you look up and a familiar coming towards you. You know that it’s one of Tony’s cars and when you see his face in the window, you stand up straight, not even dusting the dirt off your knees. But your smile fades and your heart sinks.

Behind him, Steve climbs out of the car along with Natasha from the passenger side. You’re surprised they didn’t bring the entirety of SHIELD. “Thank God we finally found you,” Tony speaks, looking at Steve at Natasha with a relieved smile.

“What are you doing here?” you ask, your voice quivering slightly as you hear movement in the house.

“Thought you’d be happy to see us. You know, considering that we’re here to rescue you,” Natasha says, folding her arms over her chest as she frowns at you, trying to read your expression.

You shake your head, opening your mouth to say something, but you stop when the front door opens and Bucky steps out. Steve, Natasha, and Tony all freeze before reaching for concealed weapons. “Didn’t think you’d find us,” Bucky says, standing on the first step of the porch, his eyes flicking over to you, almost like a warning, and he nods for you to go back inside.

“Get in the car, (Y/n),” Steve says, your head whipping over to him as you remain frozen.

“Go back inside, (Y/n). You’ll be safe there.”

“(Y/n), get in the car,” Tony urges, and the tension grows as you look between Bucky and the team that slowly walks closer toward you. You stare at Tony and Steve, your mind telling you to do what they say and that you’ll be saved. You want to go, but at the same time, you want to stay here.

“Дорогая,” Bucky calls to you, making your head slowly turn towards him. There’s a pleading look in his eyes as he holds a hand out to you. You smile at him, knowing that he will do anything to protect you and what he has with you here. At least that’s what you think.

Steve takes a step forward and when you look at him again, you see that he has his shield in his hands. “No,” you order, stepping forward to come between him and Bucky. “Don’t hurt him.”

“We won’t. Just come with us and we can fix all this-”

“There’s nothing to fix,” Bucky snaps, stepping forwards to come up behind you. “Tell them that there’s nothing to fix, that you want to stay here,” he whispers in your ear, a hand coming to rest on your shoulder.

But you don’t say anything. Instead, your eyes go to Natasha who stands tense, ready to jump in when needed. Bucky’s hand tightens on your shoulder as a warning, making you flinch. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying here.”

“He’s manipulating you, (Y/n),” Natasha says, causing Bucky to look up at her with a wicked smirk on his face. “You don’t have to be scared. We’ve got this under control,” she adds and Tony nods at her words.

“Just come home and everything will be back to normal.”

“She said she wants to stay here. And here is where we both will stay,” Bucky says, snapping at Tony and glaring coldly at him. “So maybe you guys should just leave,” he adds, placing a hand on your lower back to guide you back into the house.

Tony, Steve, and Natasha stand in shock as they stare at you, waiting for any sign from you that tells them to jump in and intervene. But you don’t even look behind you as you walk back to the house.

Inside, you look out the window to see all three of them still standing outside the car, chatting between themselves while looking back at the house. You feel Bucky standing behind you, watching the same scene as you, and he takes a deep breath through his nose. “It’s better that they leave,” he whispers, his hands resting on your hips as he rests his head against yours. “For all of us,” he adds, his flesh hand snaking around your body to rest on your stomach, pressing against the small bump that’s begun to grow.

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#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes imagine #bucky x reader #james bucky barnes #the winter soldier x reader #bucky #the winter soldier #marvel #dark marvel #dark!bucky barnes #dark!bucky x reader #dark!winter soldier

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hazelnut-u-out · 2 years

Text

Something that’s always bothered me is the presentation of the infamous ‘Mr. Jellybean’ scene in Meeseeks and Destroy versus the Planetina plotline in A Rickconvenient Mort.

(TW for grooming)

On first watch, we know Mr. Jellybean is terrible. In my opinion, I always thought they handled that whole plotline rather well. It wasn’t played for laughs or made light of, we see the emotional effect on Morty, they don’t attempt to make the predator sympathetic, and we see Rick step up as ‘Grandpa’ for one of the first times ever— to kill a pedophile, no less. Pretty strong morality alignment on that one.

Suddenly, though, when the predator is no longer an older man, but an older woman, it’s… shitty, sure, but not explicitly wrong.

On my first watch, I thought A Rickconvenient Mort was pretty blatantly a statement piece on grooming. Planetina follows textbook grooming tactics, including lovebombing, isolation, manipulation, and gaslighting. She plays into the classic ‘very mature young man.' We even have Beth as a voice of reason, finally stepping up to the plate to protect her son after what seems to be years of emotional neglect. We watch that very neglect backfire on her concern and push Morty further into this relationship. I initially thought it was a play on grooming the viewer, as well, because of the way it’s told essentially from Morty’s ‘puppy love’/‘first love’ point of view and leaves you feeling just the right amount of unsettled after the ending.

So, you could imagine my surprise when I realized that not everyone (in fact, less people than I had expected) initially clocked Planetina as a sketchy/predatory character.

So, I did what any great journalist would do— rewatched. And rewatched. And rewatched.

I wanted to form a nuanced opinion, but I came out on the other side wondering why we never got a moment with Planetina that clearly shows us she’s a condemnable character in the relationship with Morty and not just because of her methods of activism.

I think we’re actually supposed to agree with Morty in this scene, which was not my first reaction.

The age difference is obviously something they intended to be a main plot point for this storyline, as well. The explicit references to it (Morty's age, in particular) were put there for a reason, from the beginning of the episode all the way to the climax.

In a lot of ways, it makes sense to assume that maybe they didn't want to explicitly state it was wrong (though, they do through Beth, in my opinion).

That would explain why so much of A Rickconvenient Mort is set up using textbook grooming tactics; why we never see Planetina outright condemned, but see Morty emotionally destroyed and confused; why we’re (arguably) supposed to agree with Morty over Beth; why we follow Planetina all the way up to when her facetious face of peace and ambivalence crumbles.

Of course, I’m not trying to assume anything, but it does make me wonder what leads someone to write a character in this way— and even promote her as a character at times (like this post, which is captioned 'Tag your Planetina').

Then again, maybe my initial interpretation was correct and all of this was the result of a conscious choice to write and direct an episode from the point of view of Morty as a victim. I mean, it wouldn’t be too far off to assume something like that as we’ve seen them do it time and time again, just with Rick as the abuser. Think of Mortynight Run, The Vat of Acid Episode, and the new infamous episodes: A Rick in King Mortur’s Mort & Ricktional Mortpoon’s Rickmas Mortcation, just to name a few.

Maybe A Rickconvenient Mort is another one of the episodes intended to show Morty’s perspective and frame his loss of innocence as he views it, not as adults/outsiders view it.

It could be a cool contrast between how Rick protects Morty from these sorts of situations versus how Beth does.

(Disclaimer: I’m NOT saying that there aren’t different types of abuse and different appearances to abusers/predators! I just feel like both of these types of abuse/assault can be explicitly depicted as wrong.)

#rick and morty #a rickconvenient mort #rick sanchez #morty smith

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jongseonvs · 2 years

Text

texts w/ bf! keeho ft. piwon/ brother! theo (reader is fm)

warnings: none!!

- key -

lover - keeho

theyoh - theo

souleater - soul

Morelos - a fake restaurant name that i came up w LOL

Today at 10:37 PM

lover: hey did i leave my jacket at your house

me : umm no, you put it in your bag before u left

lover: oh so we’re lying now ☺️?

me : 😭😭 you literally folded it and put it up, i think i would know

lover: my bag isn’t THAT big ….. stop gaslighting nd give it back 😒

*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•

October 7 at 2:35 pm

lover: do you wanna go shopping

me: duhh pull up ho

lover: okay I’m outside hurry

me: why didn’t you tell me you were already here, i have 2 get ready 😭!

lover: why do you have to get ready it’s just the mall

me: exactly??? what if evan peters or zendaya is there

*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•

{ lover , intak, +4 others }

June 14 2023

lover: bro what is jiung doing he looks silly..

intak: LMAO IKR

seen by everyone

June 25

Today at 12:55 pm

lover : some girl gave me a free t-shirt for her business promotion at the mall who wants it

intak: send pic

theyoh: who would do that for promotions

theyoh: if that was me, you’d be PAYING me to wear MY shii 🤣

you : literally shut up theo

soul eater: 😲

jongseob : oh my 😀😀

theyoh: girl no one’s talking to you why are you even in this gc

jiung: cs she’s keehos gf

theyoh: ok??? she’s my sister before his gf and i say kick her out who’s with me!!? ✊

lover has removed theyoh

jiung: LNFAOOOOAO

you : 😭😭😭

jongseob: brooo 😭

soul eater: “ψ (｀∇´) ψ

lover: LOL! 😆

intak: …..

intak: soooo are u gonna send the shirt pic????

seen by everyone

*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•

Today at 2:15 pm

lover: what are you wearing for pink out day at the studio

me: idk….maybe….something….. pink!

lover: 😐

lover: send me a pic before you leave, i want us to match

me: ohhh why didn’t you just say that silly 😝

lover: shut the hell up.

seen

*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•

Today at 6:45 pm

lover: let’s go out tonight

lover: i want to dance with you

me: aww where attt

lover: it’s a surprise!!

me: if its at morelos…..im not going.

lover: ……

lover: what’s wrong w morelos??!?!

me: all the waiters hit on you and give you their numbers

me: and pretend as if your beautiful amazing girlfriend isn’t next to you

lover: umm yeah i know you’re amazing and beautiful that’s why i purposely give their numbers to random people in the restaurant🤭

me: YOU WHAT

me: STEPH 😭😭😭😭

read at 6:50 pm

*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•°.*°.•*•

[a/n] this is my first time writing something like this so let me know what you guys think!! ty for reading! <33 feedback is always appreciated and I love reading your comments!

#p1h keeho #p1h imagines #keeho x reader #kpop imagines #keeho imagines #keeho scenarios #keeho fluff #keeho x female reader #kpop scenarios #kpop fanfic #p1harmony fanfic #p1h x reader #piwon fanfics

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creelkobblelaufeyson69 · 9 months

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No more games

Warnings: Angst

Y/n was crying in front of The Doctor. The Toy Maker was watching with a huge grin on his face. Donna was confused of why The Doctor hadn’t seemed like he wanted to see an old friend. “Do you really think you could trick me again? After what happened last time?” The Doctor asked them as Donna now asked what had happened last time

“They helped him. They took advantage of my kindness and then backstabbed me” The Doctor explains, which makes Donna mad at them. “Why would you do that?!” She asked as she turns to face them. “Tell em why’d you did it Y/n” The Toy Master said with glee

They didn’t respond; they genuinely felt bad for what they’ve done. Many years they were able to get better, and they had. But they knew The Doctor would never believe them. “The Toy Maker threatened people very close to me. I had to join in on his game to make sure my family were to stay alive” they explained

The Toy Maker frowns; “Their lying! I didn’t threaten your family! You joined out of wanting to be apart of the game! I can’t believe you’d lie again!” Y/n was angry now, and wanted nothing more than this man to be dead

The Doctor didn’t know who to believe now. Neither of the two were trustworthy, but he decided that the Toy Maker was telling the truth. “I believe you” The Doctor says, which makes their face go blank. “Good! And I can assure you that they will be forever by my side, since you can never find someone as loyal as Y/n”

Y/n looks at The Doctor now as they now sat down. They sat crisscrossed as he watches them intently. “Fuck you guys. The gaslighter and the time lord” their hands were planted onto their face as the Toy Maker was in shock. The Doctor was more confused by them saying that, since if they were still on the Toy Maker’s side, they wouldn’t have said that

“Pardon me? You’re supposed to be on my side” the Toy Maker said, which makes them stand up. They looked at him with anger in them. “I’d rather be buried alive than spend more time with an asshole like you!” They snapped as they grabbed something out of their pocket

It was their own sonic screwdriver that they made. The Doctor was shocked, and so was Donna. “So how about we play a one last game?” They asked him. “I’m assuming you’d want your freedom if you win” he says, which makes them nod their head. “Very well” he walks towards them instead of standing by the edge of the rooftop

“Choose your poison” he looks them in their eye as The Doctor approaches them. Once The Doctor stood next to them, Y/n and The Toy Maker look at him. “Excuse me, but you cannot help them” the Toy Maker says as he kept looking at The Doctor

“Oh, but shouldn’t I?” The Doctor asked him. The Doctor looks at Y/n for a second, who had a slight smile on their teary face. They looked back at the Toy Master, who was still looking at The Doctor. “But why would you? After all, they don’t like you” Y/n uses their sonic screwdriver on The Toy Maker

The Toy Maker turns into roses, and faded away. They looked, and felt proud of themselves. “And no one likes you” they said as the roses faded. The Doctor and Donna were in shock. They looked at the two, with a big smile on their face

“Wow. It seems like they’ve changed their loyalty to someone else” Donna says as The Doctor moves closer towards them. “Whoa Doctor. Getting very close. I don’t think we’re at that stage yet” they said as a blush appeared on their face

“Right. Sorry” he backs up as a blush appears on his face as well. Y/n walks over towards the edge to look at the sky. Donna tells him to go over to talk to them. The Doctor walks over towards to stand next to them. Once he stood next to them, they looked at him

“I’m really sorry I didn’t believe you about your parents” he starts, which makes them smile a bit. “I’m just glad you believe me…” they notice his arms were too long now, which makes them make eye contact with him. Donna’s eyes widened when she realized she came back with the wrong Doctor

“I wish you hadn’t believed me” Y/n gets shoved off of the cliff now. Donna was tearing up now as he looks back at her. He grins as his arms go back to normal now. “I killed The Doctor…”

#fourteenth doctor #fourteenth doctor x reader #fourteenth doctor x you #fourteenth doctor x y/n #doctor who x reader #doctor who the giggle #david tennet

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tightjeansjavi · 1 year

Text

Burning in a Hopeless Dream

Boston QZ: Part 13

“I can’t breathe”

Joel Miller x f!o/c

A/N: I couldn’t pick just one gif for this chapter 🫠 sorry, not sorry. Also, I support Joel Millers rights, and his wrongs.

Summary: 20 years have passed since out-break day. Joel hasn’t heard from his younger brother Tommy in 3 weeks. He’s terrified of the thought of losing the last member of his family. You’re afraid that you’re losing him entirely.

~word count: 5.8k~

Warnings: implied age gap, established relationship, so much fucking angst I’m so sorry. Swearing, mean! joel, protective! joel, dark! joel, possessive, joel!, violent actions have violent consequences! joel, fluff (if you squint and use a damn magnifying glass) gaslighting, arguing, brief mentions of death, graphic violence with a knife, feelings, emotions, anger, rage, (+18) minors dni !

Songs for this chapter:

“i can’t breathe” by Bea Miller

“Poison & Wine” by The Civil Wars

“exile” by T-Swift & Bon Iver

“As It Was” by Hozier

“Rage” by Samantha Margret

“I’m a Mess” by Ed Sheeran

“Feels Like We Only Go Backwards” by Tame Impala

“How to disappear” by Lana Del Ray

“Arms Of A Stranger” by Niall Horan

“Till Forever Falls Apart” by Ashe, FINNEAS

Year 2023. 20 years after out-break day : Boston QZ

Joel Miller always struggled dealing with loss of any kind. It started with losing Sarah. The grief, anger, anguish he felt in the last moments he had with her while she faded in his arms. He didn’t want to go on after that. What the fuck was the point when the world had fucking ripped his baby girl from his arms. He struggled with the possibility of losing you. Seeing you nearly bleed out on the kitchen table, his hands stained with your blood. It was too fucking much. If you would have died that night, surely he would meet his end shortly after. He knew the feeling all too well.

For the past two years, shit had been pretty sweet. Almost, too sweet. You refused to let yourself get caught up in the possibility of things going south with Joel. You wanted to live in every fucking moment you had with him. Carefree, happy, in love. You knew deep down that this wouldn’t last. You would have been naive if you believed nothing would ever come between you and Joel. The fucked up world you lived in, and the horrors that existed within, would always be there. Haunting you.

You trusted Joel with your life. He had given no reason for you to not put your full devotion into him. In more ways than one, you had saved each other. That trust mattered so fucking much to you. You were loyal to a fault. It was your fatal flaw.

Joel had been contacting his brother frequently. Tommy was the last of Joel’s blood and he would be damned if he would end up losing him too. Joel didn’t like when he felt like he had no control over a situation. It drove him up a fucking wall, devoured him skin and flesh till only his brittle bones were left. The fear of losing those he loved deeply, was constantly on his mind.

Joel had not heard from Tommy in three weeks. Three fucking weeks. He went and checked with the radio guy everyday. It was the same response of “we’re talking to the tower everyday. Nothing from Tommy.” This was not good enough for Joel. He needed to know that his younger brother was safe, that he was alive and well. Why the fuck wasn’t he responding? His mind instantly went to the worst possible outcome; Tommy being dead. It’s all he could think about.

Today with him he brought freshly rolled cigarettes, carefully tucked away in his coat pocket. He wanted answers, and he intended to get them, one way or another. He wasted no time to cut the line of other QZ residents waiting to send their message out. He didn’t care. He found himself with his elbow leaning over a rusted metal shelf. His patience was growing thin as he stood there, looming. He had a habit of playing with his fingers, picking at the dry skin around his cuticles, till they would crack and bleed. You had taken notice that he was doing this frequently now.

When it was finally his turn, he wasted no time to walk over. Plopping down into the chair with a thud as he reached into his jacket pocket and slid over the rolled cigarettes, his elbow resting along the worn wood.

“Nothin? Is there any chance it’s comin’in at night? You’re sleepin, you miss it?” Joel asked.

“When I’m sleeping, Gabriela listens, or my son.” The man spoke as he lit the cigarette, tossing the lighter to the side as he took a short inhale. The tip of the cigarette burning bright orange. “If Tommy responded, we’d know.”

Joel didn’t like the answers he was receiving. Not one fuckin bit. There had to be more information, there just had to be.

“And you’re talkin’ to the tower?”

“Every day, Joel.”

Bullshit is what he thought.

“They gave him your message, they haven’t seen or heard from him since, and that’s it.”

Lies.

“It’s been three fuckin weeks. It’s never taken Tommy more than a day to respond. Do you get that? Cause i’m startin’ to think that you ain’t seein’ the problem here.”

The man sighed, leaning forward as he held the cigarette off to the side, the smoke billowing upwards. “Joel, I'm sure Tommy is alright.”

“Show me where the tower is.”

“Joel, you can’t be serious. The tower is in Wyoming. You’re a capable guy, but there are worse things than infected out there.”

“You think I don’t fuckin realize that?” He scoffed. Crossing his arms over his chest, his jaw clenching tightly as he ground his teeth together.

“There are raiders, there’s slavers…” He trailed off.

“But you’re “sure” Tommy’s okay? Joel asked, his brow raised.

“It’s, uh, it’s the Cody tower…Q-bar 4, but I don’t know exactly–”

Joel was already up from his chair and leaving. He got the information he needed, now to devise a plan, leave the QZ, and find Tommy.

___________

Joel had no plan. No fuckin clue how he was going to get to Wyoming, but he would be damned if he didnt try. He was well aware that he wasn’t spending a lot of time with you these days. You both were working shit FEDRA jobs. Different hours, and by the time either of you would make it home, you both were too exhausted to speak.

You had known for the past few weeks that something was up with Joel. You didn’t want to pry, or make him feel like he had to tell you what was bothering him. You wanted him to come to you, tell you himself exactly what was going on. You couldn’t deny the fact that not knowing what was going on, was hurting you. It felt like he was purposely pushing you away. You didn't want to assume the worst of your lover, but it was hard not to when he was stumbling in hours past curfew, piss drunk. He would sleep with his back facing you. You wondered if this was exactly the way Tess had felt when she realized she was losing him.

You were barely sleeping most nights. Always waiting up for him, waiting for his return. You’d pretend to be asleep when the bed would dip down from his weight on it. You’d secretly pray that he’d wrap you up in his warm, strong arms finally. The moment never came and you felt so cold, so empty. You bottled it up, allowing it to devour you from the inside out.

One particular night, Joel had come stumbling in, a bottle of half drank whiskey in his grasp. He was high off something. Whatever pills he could get on. Pills that he had smuggled in for ration cards. He didn’t give a damn about his next meal. He just wanted to numb his feelings. Bury them so fuckin deep, that you, his sunlight, would never be able to reach them.

You could hear the sound of his keys clanking on the kitchen table. The front door locking shut. Then, his footsteps. His boots were heavy on the creaky floorboards. You heard his approach just outside the bedroom door, could hear his mumbling as he pushed it open, revealing your curled up form under the covers. The moonlight from the window casting a soft glow against your face. You looked beautiful, you always did.

You could hear his staggered, heavy steps. The bed dipped down beside you as he slowly sank down, the bottle of whiskey held between his knees as he leaned over and whispered, “you awake?”

You let out a sigh as you rolled over so you were facing him. Your eyes slowly fluttered open as you watched him bring the rim of the bottle to his lips, taking a long swig. “Am now.”

He was reaching for you immediately, tugging the covers that enclosed you from him.

“I need you baby, my sweet girl. Please, please, please.”

“Need to feel you.”

“Need to feel your skin on mine.”

“Please.”

“Please, baby. I’ll make you feel so fuckin good. I got you, you got me, Remember?”

He sounded half broken, teetering on the edge from the whiskey on his tongue, and the impending thoughts of losing the only person left in his blood family.

You sat up, grasping the covers between your fingers as he tried to tug them from your grasp.

“Joel, what’s wrong? What happened?” You spoke on the edge of caution given his intoxicated state.

“No. don’t wanna talk. Don’t wanna feel anythin ‘cept you.”

“Joel, you’re drunk and clearly upset over something–”

He cut you off. “M’sober enough to know that the only thing I want right now, is you. You gonna deny me that, sweet girl?” He slurred.

You found yourself at a loss for words. Your eyes focused on the bottle clutched his grasp, his knuckles turning white from the tight hold he had on the bottle. For a moment, you were afraid that it would shatter in his palm. He looked at you, his dark brown eyes glazed over, emotion swirling behind his darkened pupils. He brought the rim of the bottle up to his lips, taking another long swig as he stared through you. The look he gave you sent an un-welcomed chill down your spine.

You reached for the bottle, not wanting him to use liquor to cope with whatever it was that he was actively going through. You brought your hand around his wrist as you gently pried his fingers from the tight grasp they had on the bottle. He didn’t move to stop you as you took the bottle from him, placing it down on the nightstand, next to your knife, and far from his reach. You had kept the flower crown that you made him 2 years ago. The flowers were wilted and dried, but the memory remained. Alongside was the polaroid photo of you and Joel in the field of wildflowers. Now, just another distant memory.

“Enough of that, okay? I know the liquor is good. I know it helps, I know it brings you comfort, but you’re not gonna sit here and hide from me, okay? Please, Joel. Tell me what’s going on. Let me help you, please.”

“S’okay. Can just get another bottle. M’not gonna fight you. Love you too much to do somethin like that. Would be hurtin myself in the process, more than I already have.”

You were reaching for his face, gently sliding your warm palms around his cheeks. Your thumbs were lightly stroking the highest points of his cheek bones. He averted his eyes from your gaze then. He didn’t want you to see him like this. Anger started to simmer, bubble, blister in the pit of his stomach. You shouldn’t be taking care of him like this. He should be taking care of you. He was supposed to be the strong one, the tough one, the protector. Especially now. He didn't believe that he deserved your comfort, not now. Not when he was like this, a shell of a man.

“You don’t want me like this, honey? You don’t want me anymore?” He spoke with a low drawl, his words slurring together.

“Joel, don’t start with that. You damn well know that’s not true.”

“Then why can’t you give me what I want? I ain’t askin’ for much. Why can’t you give that to me? Why won’t you let me? You’re breakin’ my fuckin’ heart baby.”

“You’re drunk, Joel. I can fuckin taste the whiskey on your breath from here. I’m not gonna take advantage of you when you're in this state. Do you hear me? You deserve so much fuckin more than that.” You tried to coax him to look at you, dragging your fingers against his jaw, but he wouldn’t budge.

He scoffed under his breath, fighting the urge to roll his eyes. “Since when has a little liquor stopped us, huh? Sweet girl, just tell me that you don’t want me anymore. S’okay, I can take it. I can handle it. Gotta leave this shit hole soon anyway.” He admitted.

“Those times were different Joel, and you know it.” You continued to gently hold his face, hoping that somehow you could get through to him. “Please stop saying that I don’t want you. That’s fuckin bull, and if you’re gonna act like a fuckin asshole right now–What’re you talking about leaving?”

“Tommy. I haven’t heard from Tommy in three fuckin weeks. He could be dead for all I know. He could be fuckin’ dead, and I ain’t gonna sit here and not do somethin’ about it. I found out that the radio tower is in Wyoming. I’m gonna trade some shit for a car battery, find a truck outside the QZ, and I'm gonna go find him.”

You let out a deep, slow sigh when Joel finally told you the reason why he was piss drunk and acting this way. Maybe you hadn’t lost him after all. Maybe, just maybe.

“You’re not going alone Joel. You’re not going to Wyoming by your fucking self. Don’t think for a second that i’m going to let you go on a suicide mission like that.”

Joel couldn’t help but let out a chuckle, his head dropping between your hands for a moment before he lifted it slightly to look up at you. “It ain’t your fuckin choice to make ‘darlin.” You’re not gonna stop me, and I ain’t leavin’ my fuckin’ brother out there Gwen. You just don’t fuckin get it, do you?” His tone was harsh, jagged and laced with venom. He placed his hands over your small ones and ripped them from his face as he staggered up from the bedside.

“I never said I was going to stop you Joel. All I said was that you’re not fucking going alone. The fuck do you mean I don’t get it? What don’t I understand?” Your heart clenched in on itself from how he was speaking to you. You felt like a cornered animal, fearful of what was to come next. Teeth bared, snarling, with fear stricken eyes.

“You ain’t have any family left to understand.” He knew he struck a nerve with you just by the way your face immediately fell. You were visibly taken aback. His words sliced through you, cutting your heart up into tiny pieces, piercing your lungs.

“Fuck you. How fucking dare you–” You paused with your hands balling up in fists at your sides. “I may not have any fucking family left Joel, but that doesn’t mean that you get to stand there and tell me that I don’t understand what you’re going through.”

His jaw clenched harshly through the soft, casting moonlight. His own hands were at his sides, balled up in fists. All he wanted was your comfort. He nearly begged for it, but you wouldn’t give in. Why wouldn’t you give in? Let him bury his feelings away, deep between your legs. Your denial etched deep into him, reaching the cavern of his heart. He’d never force you, never would dare harm you.

He never learned how to handle loss well. He found it so easy to slip back into his old patterns. They welcomed him in with tender touches, warm whispers, as darkness enclosed around his heart.

His boots were heavy on the creaky floorboards as he took a few steps towards you. He didn’t speak, and he refused to meet your eyes as he reached around you, snatching the bottle back up from the nightstand. For a brief moment, he thought about giving in. Apologizing for being so mean, so cruel. Allow himself to crumple in your lap, and soak his heavy tears against your chest.

He didn’t want that. He wanted to suffer through his feelings, alone.

“Joel..” Your voice was hesitant, timid, nervous. There were tears already threatening to spill over as you struggled to hold them at bay.

He didn’t say a word. Even as your hand reached out for his wrist, eyes pleading with him. He didn’t give in. He was already walking back to the open doorway, bringing the bottle up to his lips as he took another painful swig.

“Why are you doing this? Baby, why won’t you let me help you? Please…you don’t have to go through this alone. I got you, you got me, always. Remember?”

“M’sleepin on the couch.” He finally responded. “Want to be alone, and if you know what’s good for you, you won’t follow me.”

“Joel…”

“You fuckin deaf or somethin ‘darlin?” I said, leave.me.alone.”

Your emotions boiled over, tears blurring your vision as you reached for your knife on the nightstand. Gripping the familiar handle in your grasp. in one swift movement, you threw your knife at the door, purposely missing his head. The blade embedded into the worn, paint peeled door. The edge of the blade just barely grazed his ear, drawing blood from the thin skin. You had warm tears streaming down your cheekbones, your breaths heavy as Joel looked at you, stunned.

He reached his hand up, brushing his finger tip against his ear, feeling a cool wetness. He brought his finger down, observing the droplets of maroon against his skin. He chuckled, amusement in his tone.

“You missed.”

He yanked your knife from the door.

“It was on purpose Joel. You damn well know how good my aim is.”

He hummed lightly as he twirled the knife with ease. “You picture stickin’ me between the eyes when you threw it?”

“No. I imagined it nailing you in the fucking heart, you asshole.”

“Ouch. That really hurts, sweet girl.” He twirled it once more, looking at your broken, beautiful face. His presence was no longer looming in the doorway. He was gone.

You did not see Joel Miller for the next 4 days. You counted every single fucking one of them.

You waited up for him each night, praying he would come home, he didn’t. Night four you were worried something had happened to him. Your spiraling mind immediately goes to the worst possible outcome; Joel, dead in a ditch somewhere. Second outcome, he found someone else. Someone that wasn’t you. No. There was no fucking way he found someone. He would never. You kept telling yourself that neither outcome was true. It was hours past curfew, the streets were quiet as you packed your bag. Grabbing your spare knife, and pistol. You were wearing one of his flannels as you headed out into the darkness of night to find him.

________________

*one day prior*

Joel was pissed. (surprise, surprise). He was furious with himself, and you. Mostly himself, for being a goddamn fucking asshole. It was easy to continue to drink the pain away, numb all his feelings. Maybe he could consume so much fucking liquor, he could forget what your face looked like.

That was a laughable thought to have. You were unforgettable. Mother fucker, were you so goddamn unforgettable. The worst part? He was reminded of how cruel he was to you each time he looked down at your stupid fucking knife. The handle was well worn, but when he saw your initials carved into the thick wood, he lost it. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you.

He needed something, someone, to let his anger explode out on.

All it took was two QZ residents to look at him the wrong way. Long enough that he didn’t even think of the consequences of his actions. Fuck the consequences. Fuck FEDRA, fuck the Firefly’s, fuck the infected, and fuck this world.

He followed the two suckers down an alley, hearing them laughing about god knows what. He recognized them. One of the fuckers had given Tess and Bea dirty looks for holding hands in the community center. The other? Had the hots for you. Unashamedly would check you out while you were working alongside Joel. Two excuses for human beings is all he saw as he crept down the alley. His footsteps were light, quiet, unheard.

He had only meant to teach them a lesson. Rough ‘em up a bit. Cuts, bruises, black eye maybe a broken wrist, or two. Then he heard the one guy say your name. Joel Miller was seeing red. These fuckers didn’t stand a chance. Your knife in his grasp as he spilled the filth of their crimson blood along the concrete.

It was a reckless decision, spur of the moment, and fueled by his rage. He would pay the brutal consequences of his actions, shortly after.

The tip of his knife was dripping with the congealed blood of his victims. His breaths, heavy and jagged as he came to his senses.

Too late.

“Fuck.”

Shouting, FEDRA soldiers, the wind whipping in his ears as he ran.

Had he left the crime scene quicker, he probably would have escaped. Not only was he out past curfew, but he had just brutally murdered two QZ residents. Whoops.

It didn’t take long for the FEDRA fucks to catch him, rough him up, and throw him in lockup. His life was spared simply for the fact that he had two of the soldiers wrapped around his finger, all because of a packet of pills.

The amount of liquor in his system numbed his pain receptors. He couldn’t feel shit as he was thrown into a cell.

___________

*present time*

You were incredibly cautious as you headed out onto the dark streets. You knew your decision to go looking for Joel past curfew, was a reckless one. Did you care? Not one fucking bit.

You flattened your back against a crumbling brick wall as two FEDRA soldiers passed, talking amongst each other.

“You know he doesn’t deserve to live, right? You saw what he did, man. There was so much fuckin blood.”

“He’ll get what’s coming for him eventually. If we kill him, who the hell is gonna keep getting us high?”

“Fair point.”

You were silent as their footsteps sounded further and further away. You knew they were talking about Joel; your Joel. You let out a soft breath as you crept from your hiding place. Joel had killed two people; fact. Joel was also alive, and that’s all you could think about now.

You knew exactly where Joel would be. So you waited outside the building, silently devising a plan for how you were going to bust him out of there, before FEDRA could change their mind.

Your silent thoughts were interrupted when you heard a heavy metal door creak open, the sound of a grunt, followed by a thud of a body hitting the concrete. You knew right away that it was Joel.

He was pulling himself up from the concrete, staggering to his feet and by his posture alone, you could tell he was in pain. “Motherfucker.” He grunted to himself.

You made your presence known as you appeared from behind the wall. He didn’t see you at first, but when he heard stray rocks crunching beneath boots, he was on high alert.

“Joel.”

He whipped around, nearly giving himself whiplash from the fast movement. Your voice was all too distinguishable.

“What in god’s fucking name are you doin’ out here?!” He was already walking towards you, his eyes locked on yours.

“Are you fuckin’ insane ‘darlin? Or are you just fuckin’ stupid?” He continued, waiting for you to flinch from his tone, or take a step back. You did neither.

“You tryin’ to get your ass thrown in lockup too?! Fuckin’ answer me Gwen!”

He was close enough now that you could see his split upper lip, ugly purple and blue bruising along his beautiful jaw, and his black eye. In a fury, you had grabbed his face in your palms gently, searching his eyes.

“Who the fuck did this to you?”

He was taken aback by your gentle touch, he expected you to be rough on him from the way he treated you, but you were the complete fucking opposite.

“Who fucking did this to you Joel?!” You harshly whispered.

He chuckled as he looked into your eyes, “FEDRA. Got thrown in lockup, obviously. Now answer me. What the fuck are you–”

You cut him off, ignoring his question. You knew the answer as to why he was thrown in lockup. You wanted to hear it from his own mouth, in his words.

“What the fuck did you do to get thrown in lockup?” You demanded.

He sneered at you. His face hurt from the movement but he didn’t care.

“Wouldn’t you like to know ‘darlin.”

You let go of his face and grabbed him by the collar of his shirt, harshly yanking it.

“Yeah, cowboy. I would fuckin like to know.”

He leaned in, his breath hot on your face as he spoke, “killed a couple of fuckers with your knife. Felt fuckin good. Thought of you as their blood spilled out on the fuckin’ concrete. Thought of you the whole time baby.” He spat.

You didn’t even skip a fucking beat from his confession. You already knew the truth after all, and there was no reason for you to be shocked.

“Yeah? You thought of me? Did they deserve it?”

“Didn’t like the way they were lookin’ at me. Wanted to teach ‘em a lesson, and I got carried away. One of ‘em gave Beatrix a dirty look for holdin’ Tess’s hand a while back. The other? He had the hots for you. Always lookin’ at you, checkin’ you out. They both deserved it.”

“Y’know you can’t just go and kill people cause they looked at you the wrong way Joel.”

“I know, but I'd be lyin’ to your face if I told ya it didn’t feel good. They were scumbags, and they had it ‘comin.”

“Did you really have to go and kill them with my knife though?” You asked, your hands were still gripping the collar of his shirt tightly.

“Considerin’ you threw it at my fuckin’ head, yeah. Felt poetic.”

You let out a sigh, loosening your grip on him slightly, your anger was still simmering.

“You gonna’ answer my question now? Gonna’ tell me why in the hell you’re out here past fuckin’ curfew nonetheless?”

“You haven’t come home in 4 fuckin days Joel. I was worried that something had happened. That you were fucking dead in a goddamn ditch somewhere. I’m perfectly aware of the consequences of being out past curfew, Joel. I don’t care about the consequences. I just had to make sure that you were okay.”

He was in disbelief. His brows were furrowed in as you explained yourself.

“What’re you doin’ givin’ a fuck about me after the way I treated you, sweet girl. What is fuckin’ wrong with you? You shoulda’ been wishin’, prayin’ that I was dead.”

You laughed, your voice cracking slightly because how could this man be so fucking stupid?

“What makes you think that I wouldn’t care? You think that I can just erase you that easily, Joel? You think for a second that I wouldn’t fucking come looking for you?”

He opened his mouth to speak, no words were formed, he looked like a fucking blubbering fish.

“Save it. I don’t want to hear you say some bullshit about how I deserve better. I’m too good for you, blah blah blah. Fucking swallow those words right now Joel.”

He clenched his jaw, grinding his teeth together.

“Yes ma'am.” He whispered.

You wasted no time grabbing his hand, taking him back home, despite his protests.

The shower started shortly after you arrived home. Your movements were slow, gentle, careful as you removed his shirt from the hem. You found new scars blooming on his beautiful skin. Despite the fact that you were emotionally hurt by this man, you refused to let him suffer alone. You pressed a light kiss to his soft tummy, just above the navel.

“Baby Doll, what’re you–”

“Shuddup Joel.”

You tossed his shirt to the side before you undid his belt buckle, listening to the clanking of metal as you carefully shimmied his jeans down his legs with his boxers. You kept your gaze locked on his eyes as you discarded his clothes. You ignored the feeling of his hands along your waist, his own touch was delicate, comforting. You pushed his hands off of you as you gestured to the shower.

“Get in.”

“Gwen, please–”

“Get in the fucking shower Joel.”

He let out a pained sigh, bringing his hands down to his sides as he stepped under the cold stream of water. It felt like knives and needles stabbing into his back all at once.

You were already turning on your heel, attempting to leave till his hand reached out, wrapping around your wrist as he pulled you under the stream with him.

“Joel what the fuck are you doing–”

“Please. Please, darlin’ don’t go. Please, I'm sorry.” He begged, his tone rasping.

Your clothes were already being soaked through as he pulled you into his chest, holding you firmly against him.

“Please don’t leave me.”

You let out a sigh, slowly turning around in his arms so you were facing him.

“Apologies are not going to fix this Joel.”

“I know honey, I know. I promise I will make it up to you.”

You didn’t respond. Instead, you reached around him and grabbed what was left of the bar of soap. You gently wiped away the dirt, dried blood, and filth from his skin. You let him hold you, but you refused to fully give in. He was smart enough, respectful enough, to not try anything funny.

_________________

The nightmares started shortly after you brought Joel back home. Each night they got worse and it killed you inside to see him suffer like this. You were torn up. Joel had hurt you, you hurt him and it was beginning to feel like a vicious, endless cycle.

On this particular night, it was storming. The wind howled as the heavy rain pelted against the windows. Flashes of bright, white lighting struck against the black sky, and rumbles of thunder followed shortly after. You could hear Joel mumbling in his sleep, his back facing you. He mumbled Sarah’s name, Tommy. His tone was strained, pained. “You’re okay. Please, you’re okay. Move your hand, baby.” “Tommy, help me!” He was twitching under the covers, his body was trembling, there was cold sweat dripping down his bare back, chest, and forehead.

You wanted to pretend that you couldn’t hear his mumbles, his pained cries for his dead daughter and assumably alive brother. You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to block him out entirely, but you couldn’t. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn’t stop caring about this man.

You rolled over so you were facing his back and placed your hand between his shoulder blades. Your fingers splayed across his sweat soaked skin.

“Joel. Baby, wake up.” You whispered.

You received no response, even as you gently shook him.

“Joel. wake up, you’re having a nightmare. Wake up baby, it’s okay. I’m here. I’m here.”

You shook him once more, a little firmer this time and he suddenly shot up from under the covers. His eyes were wide, frantic as he looked around. His wild gaze finally landed on you. His chest was rising and falling harshly, his nostrils flared and he looked like he was in a daze.

“Joel. Hey, honey. It’s okay. You’re okay, you’re safe.”

He was reaching for you, wrapping his arms around your waist as he yanked you to his chest, pulling you into his lap.

Your thighs instinctively wrapped around his hips as you brought your hands up to his face, gently holding his cheeks in your warm palms, while his sweaty forehead rested against yours.

“Sarah..she–she. My baby girl–”

“I know baby..I'm sorry.” You gently stroked your thumbs against his cheekbones as his tears began to freely fall, his body still trembling under your gentle grasp.

“Tommy he–he.”

“He’s alive Joel. I promise you, he’s alive.”

“We don’t know. We–we don’t. He’s all I have left of my family. He’s the only one left.”

“I know he is Joel. I know, and I understand. You’re safe, and you don’t need to go through this alone. Okay? I know how you feel right now baby. I felt the same things you are feeling right now, after they died.”

He pulled back slightly, his brows furrowed in as he looked at you.

“Tell me how they died, please. I-I–want to know.”

“I had to kill them, Joel; My parents. It was just the three of us at one point. I was twenty. Came home one day, everything seemed normal. We were sitting around the dinner table and they were..something was off. They had this..this dead look in their eyes. They weren’t talking and then, I just knew. I fucking knew they were infected. I had no time to mourn Joel. They lunged at me and I took my knife, and killed them. Their only child, their only daughter, killed them. I left Michigan after that. Left the ranch, left my home, and never returned.”

Joel was at a loss for words. He could not even begin to fathom what you had gone through. He felt entirely guilty for saying that you couldn’t understand what he was going through. You knew his pain all too well. He held you as close as he physically could. His grip around your waist was firm, yet gentle. God, he felt terrible.

“Honey, baby, I'm so sorry..I’m so sorry that you had to go through that.”

“Joel, please do not feel sorry for me. Okay? I did what I had to do to survive. It was either me, or them. I was left with no other choice.”

“I don’t care, my sweet girl. You should have never had to go through that.”

“I endured it, Joel. I mourned, I moved on. Ran right into you. The point is, you shouldn’t feel alone. You don’t have to be, okay? Please don’t push me away. I know how easy it is to dig yourself into a hole, let the walls cave in. I know exactly what you’re feeling, and I am right here for you. I’m not going anywhere.”

“We have to do somethin’ I can’t just leave him out there Gwen.”

“I know. That’s why you and I are going to go look for Tommy, together. We’re gonna get that car battery, leave the QZ, and go to Wyoming. I’ll go anywhere with you. I got you, you got me, always.”

He took a deep breath, while he allowed your words, and the significance they held, wash over him.

He gave you a small nod, stroking his thumbs along the soft skin of your lower back.

“You got me, I got you, always.”

It was true, you’d follow Joel Miller, your fellow, your guy, anywhere.

Chapter 14:

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