teacup-gathering-itself - Tumblr blog

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Just realized I don’t have a hyperfixation I’m DYING. I think I’ll find a new job to give my brain something to obsess over.

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James “unfathomable number of allergies and frankly astonishing number of recessive traits” Kirk is visually interesting to Spock especially when compared to the other humans around; of course he subconsciously keeps sliding his gaze over to the captain. He’s also directly under his command, his attention should veer to Kirk as opposed to anyone else on board. It’s just his mind logically choosing who to defer to and who likely will need his attention most urgently. It’s his job, and he’s excellent at this job. That’s all it is. A logical conclusion regarding a noted pattern.

It’s definitely not got anything to do with the way his barely-in-regulation uniform frames his body, or the physique he maintains, or the devastating silhouette he cuts, or the charisma he exudes, or his illogical approach to life that somehow still works, or his exceptionally emotive voice that fills a room effortlessly, or his sheer brilliance and masterful grasp of complex mathematical and scientific concepts, or anything of that sort. Of course not. That would be illogical. And Spock is a being who is rooted in logical above all else.

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My other hyperfixations scheming for ways to steal my attention from the current ✨favorite✨

🎶 Oh no what we gonna do / the king likes Daniel more than me and you / Oh no what we gonna do / We gotta get him outta here 🎶

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This just in y’all the hyperfixation is CHANGING

We are entering Star Trek era (2023) and slowly exiting the Harry Potter era (2023)

UPDATE: that ^^ is a LIE. We are IN BETWEEN HYPERFIXATIONS. CODE RED.

For reference this side blog has existed since the start of the HP era and will occasionally bounce back to other fandoms but I can feel the brain worms shifting.

I still have thoughts about house of black but they’re on the back burner for rn.

Previous eras that you can 1000% inbox me about:

Sharks 🦈

Hannibal (2013) 💅

Initial D 🚘

Naoki Urasawa’s Monster 🩺

Harry Potter fanon 🪄

Haikyuu!! 🏐

Yuri!!! On Ice ⛸️

Shingeki no Kyojin/Attack on Titan 💉

Free! Iwatobi Swim Club/Eternal Summer/etc/50% off 🏊

Boku no Hero Academia (interest is in the world building mostly but it still earned its place on the list) 🏙️

Percy Jackson/anything Uncle Rick tbh 🗡️

Public Transport design/functionality 🚃

Humanity throughout the ages/Humans are Space Orcs/etc 🛰️

Warrior Cats/furry fandom (defining element in my socialization and development lmao) 😽

Queer History/theory/etc 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩

Niche History facts 📚

Ai no Kusabi 🏳️‍🌈 🚩

The Finder Series 🏳️‍🌈 🚩

Really anything tbh I like to chat 🤷

You’re telling me a shrimp 🍤 fried this rice 🍚??

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The depth of Kirk being a big himbo in his slut era all the time in a very overt human way, while also being a huge nerd brainiac supercomputer on legs.

Contrasting Spock, who is a supercomputer on legs, but ALSO a big himbo in his slut era in a very overt Vulcan way.

Proof: He is so TOUCHY with his captain. He lets touch be a staple in their relationship and just. Doesn’t mention its significance to his culture. Lets people think it’s just him “putting up with” his captain. To non-Vulcans, sure that excuse works. But any Vulcan with working eyes knows what he’s up to. They’re silently scandalized.

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James Tiberius Kirk, calling Spock a straightlaced Boy Scout and doing the Boy Scout salute to add to the teasing

For reference, the Boy Scout sign looks very similar to something …else on Vulcan

Anyways Spock reads Kirk’s actions both completely incorrectly in the current context and completely correctly in the grand scheme of things.

They kiss. Kirk takes 3 business days to realize what actually happened in this interaction.

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I’m back in Spirk hell. Ffs.

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Minerva “Scotland FOREVAAAA” McGonagall entering Hogwarts as a brash 11yo girl in the absolutely was a spectacle. Heirs were scandalized. Sexualities were questioned. Bullies were terrified. Teachers were tired.

Why is she so good at managing so many characters like the Marauders and the Weasley Twins? She was the BLUEPRINT for social upheaval at Hogwarts.

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Am I about to force myself to remember all of my Spanish skills to read a good omens fic that just seems fantastic? Yes. I am. I haven’t been fluent in nearly a decade. Also this will be the first good omens fic I’ve read. Wish me luck @neil-gaiman

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NEW HEADCANON

Pumpkin Juice was just a pumpkin cream cold brew/PSL.

Hogwarts is the largest consumer of PSLs on the planet.

Squibs brought the recipe over to the muggle world.

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The Sorting Hat listened to Harry’s pleas to be in Gryffindor because it realized putting Harry “Himbo” Potter into the snake pit would fundamentally change everything bc those heirs don’t know how to act with someone who’s so transparent and emotional, let alone so viciously fruity. He’d have been a house mascot and the Hat would have to listen to all of Albus’ rants from inside his office.

Truly the prophesy only came true bc the Sorting Hat didn’t want to have to listen to all that.

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The more I think about it the more Severus makes sense if he was a line cook. Like—

Terse with everyone? Line cook

Questionable tattoos and even more questionable friends? Line cook

Looks like a fuckin gremlin? Line cook

Rarely gives out compliments/praise? Line cook

Hates his bosses? Line cook

Wears the exact same outfit every day and it’s all black? Line cook

Knows where all his stuff is and if you’ve taken from his stock/stash? Line cook

Has secret recipes and also refuses to cook by the book (bc the recipe was written by an idiot)? Line cook

Could make so much more money working for individual clients instead of an establishment? Line cook

Somehow knows everyone when he logically has no business knowing them? Line cook

Weird philosophical advice? Line cook

Informally adopts kids at his job and would die for them? Line cook

Tired? Line cook

Knows a plug for whatever you need? Line cook

All the important dealers know him? Line cook

Severus getting a prep cook job in Cokeworth one summer and picking up solid mf knife skills. Like those culinary school chopping videos. Just fast asf precise knife work and handling.

He gets back to Hogwarts and it’s just business as usual until he’s DEAD tired one day and is prepping ingredients in Slughorn’s class. He gets to something that needs to be sliced uniformly and is similar in shape/size to food he prepped at the restaurant and muscle memory just kicks into overdrive.

The whole classroom freezes and looks at him because idk if y’all know this but that shit is LOUD compared to hesitant knife work. It smacks the cutting board and has a way different rhythm than normal kitchen noise.

Yeah it’s a skill no one has encountered unless they have been back of house at a restaurant.

Severus is too exhausted to process that anyone is paying attention to him so he just keeps going. Ingredients? Prepped? Potion? Brewed with gusto, like he was born to do it. His brain isn’t online so he’s acting like it’s a dream and adds in some flourish and flair, a trick to catch a knife, a fancy stir to help aerate the brew, a crazy amount of multitasking just because he can.

Jaw dropping behavior.

Slughorn doesn’t know how to react honestly, and is spared needing to praise him considering Severus is half awake when he hands his potion to his head of house.

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Harry Potter AU where he’s dead at Kings Cross and when told “you have to choose whether you return or you board the train” he’s like.

Can I decide later? I’m tired.

And death kinda gives him this once over, taking in just how exhausted he is, and is like.

Yeah, kid. Sure, you can wait to decide.

And anyways Harry pops up years after he was declared dead, just one day walks out of the Potter Family Crypt.

In a world where Neville Longbottom dealt the killing blow, and there were two boys who took part in the prophecy, Harry returns and meets his peers, who have all grown into full adults, and are forced to realize just how bad it was. How malnourished Harry Potter was. How young he really was. How insane it was that they all lived through that in their childhood.

Oh and for funsies. How does the world find out about Harry’s return? He visits a memorial site and corrects the tour guide.

“That ABSOLUTELY is not what happened??”

“Oh and you’re such an expert?”

“Uh yeah. I literally was there.”

“Really? And you are?”

“Harry. Harry Potter. Yanno, the Boy Who Lived and all that ‘neither can survive while the other lives’ shit? Did you need me to recite everything Voldemort said to me in the graveyard? Or the forest? Or from the back of Quirrel’s head? Or from inside my head when he found out his soul was in my scar? Or is there something else you need? I never thought I’d get used to everyone recognizing me, but it’s weird now that people don’t…”

“???????”

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Freddie Lounds and Rita Skeeter are the same character. I love both my girl bosses, they're here to get published and get that money, ethics be damned. I would die for them both.

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Muggleborn video game modders making hogwarts packs with inside jokes for each other to enjoy.

Cooking Mama but it’s Severus Snape and he teaches you how to “brew fame, put a stopper to death, bottle luck” and even more nonsensical claims. He doesn’t give outright praise but you’ll see “adequate” or “acceptable” and his face will be less pinched.

Pokémon but it’s Hagrid and he RAMBLES. There’s a second pack that emphasizes his accent.

Minecraft with magic creature mobs and enderman is Quirrel.

Slenderman but it’s Voldemort and you’re in the Forbidden Forest and the rest of the Hogwarts grounds. There is also a pack with McGonagall as slenderman which is somehow infinitely more scary because they spent so much time and effort into her expressions.

FNAF but it’s the prefects/professors and Filch. They randomly change who you get each night.

There’s a Stardew Valley mod pack with all the professors and a secret second pack where they’re all Severus except one of them is actually Snape and the rest are polyjuiced as Snape. You can’t romance anybody unless you expose the fakes.

Plants vs. Zombies but it’s Sprouts greenhouses and the zombies are NEWTS students.

The SIMS packs are the craziest though. No one talks about the SIMS packs, but if you want access, just ask around and someone will get you a link.

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Sirius “massive flirt / low body count” Black vs. Regulus “doesn’t flirt / massive body count” Black

A real showcase of loyalty vs. ambition and how it shows in unlikely behavior patterns.

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No one:

Severus, dead tired, just hallucinating his way through Potions:

Severus getting a prep cook job in Cokeworth one summer and picking up solid mf knife skills. Like those culinary school chopping videos. Just fast asf precise knife work and handling.

He gets back to Hogwarts and it’s just business as usual until he’s DEAD tired one day and is prepping ingredients in Slughorn’s class. He gets to something that needs to be sliced uniformly and is similar in shape/size to food he prepped at the restaurant and muscle memory just kicks into overdrive.

The whole classroom freezes and looks at him because idk if y’all know this but that shit is LOUD compared to hesitant knife work. It smacks the cutting board and has a way different rhythm than normal kitchen noise.

Yeah it’s a skill no one has encountered unless they have been back of house at a restaurant.

Severus is too exhausted to process that anyone is paying attention to him so he just keeps going. Ingredients? Prepped? Potion? Brewed with gusto, like he was born to do it. His brain isn’t online so he’s acting like it’s a dream and adds in some flourish and flair, a trick to catch a knife, a fancy stir to help aerate the brew, a crazy amount of multitasking just because he can.

Jaw dropping behavior.

Slughorn doesn’t know how to react honestly, and is spared needing to praise him considering Severus is half awake when he hands his potion to his head of house.