whimsicalcrying

[whimsicalcrying]

Blue Umbrella

Pairing: Kento Nanami x Reader

Summary: The first time Nanami notices you.

w/c: 2.8k

a/n: This is my first ever x reader fic so I'm super nervous!! I do really like the vibe I went for so please let me know if you'd want more of this reader with Nanami.

Any feedback is welcomed! Enjoy!!

Ao3 | M.List

!Warnings!: mentions of death, dead bodies and arranged marriages.

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It was never a question if humans were meant to die. 

Death is one of the many truths of the universe. To the very planet we know. But there are some truths that the men of our era spend their lives putting aside. A truth so simple even a mere child could understand, a truth that truly made the world go round.

Life repeats and nature evolves. 

Nanami Kento knew these fundamentals well, just as others in his line of work did. There was no wondering if or how he died, it was a matter of when . He saw firsthand how the scales of power shift. 

Of how quickly a man could become something akin to a god.

Or something more monstrous.

Nanami didn't want power. He didn't want anything really. Nanami was simply doing what he could, and that meant returning to the world that broke every part of his soul. A job that demanded more than just his time and effort. 

Returning back to the world of sorcerers wasn't easy after spending his time running from it. The higher ups and his colleagues brought him back to his teen years, the years he spent countless hours at his dead end salary job trying to forget.

He was on the verge of regretting coming back. “What is the purpose of the small good I can do?” he’d often ask himself as he went from mission to mission. It still felt better than what he was doing after he left Jujutsu Tech.

The bleakness of both jobs seemed to stay with him regardless of feeling a bit better about his role in the world. After work, what did he have besides an empty apartment and friends that nearly die every time they clock in?

Something changed the first summer after switching jobs again. Something- no, someone had finally caught his attention.

He remembers it clearly, a hot rainy day where water rolled down the many steps to the entrance of Jujutsu High. Nanami had just come back from a mission, ready to give a quick report and head home exactly on his schedule.

Instead, he faltered, catching a glimpse of you.

You were standing in the rain with Gojo at your side. Nanami had never seen Gojo look so cautious around a person before, but he stood there, hands clenching and unclenching at his side, blue eyes trained on you as you looked up to the cloudy sky. 

The hot sticky rain was hitting your face, slowly running from the top of your head, to your cheeks and then framing your jaw. To others it would seem quite strange, but to Nanami it seemed like you needed this. Like nature herself was grounding you.

Nanami couldn't move. His muscles locked mid step, just his left leg on the upper stair as he watched the scene before him. You looked familiar in a way, but he couldn't put his finger on it. Perhaps you were the embodiment of life and death. Gentle yet a slow killing poison. He couldn't place you in his memories yet he felt as if he knew you.

He wanted to know you.

Forcing himself to come back to his senses, he shakes off some water from his hair and starts his journey back up. That's when he hears your voice, gentle yet stern.

“I’ll run a cursed blade through my heart before I’d ever listen to them and marry you.”

Gojo gave a small laugh, shoving his hands into his pockets looking at the sky with you. “I wouldn't expect anything less from you, Y/N Kiyomi.” He muses before dropping his tone to something deeper, curious. “What do they have on you to ask for such a thing?”

“Have? They have my life, Satoru, just as they have yours.” Your answer came easily. Just as you open your mouth to speak more, you catch Nanami's tall figure making its way up the stairs. Clearing your throat, you look down to your feet as Gojo spots him, waving the serious looking man over. 

“Nanami! You’re going to make the ladies go mad with your wet shirt clinging to you like that.” Gojo teases, throwing an arm over the man's shoulders before he could protest. Throwing him off casually, Nanami keeps his eyes trained firmly on you, his glasses off in his hand so he could see without the rain drops blurring his vision. 

“Have we met before?” Nanami asks you  bluntly but of course it's Gojo who answers. 

“Whaaat? You're telling me you don't remember the Jujutsu techs resident cry baby?” Gojo grins, bringing his arm around Nanami once more to whisper in his ear. “I suppose Y/N is all grown up now. They really….filled out.” 

Without looking, you hard launch a rock to hit Gojo right between the eyes.

“Ignore him, he's a fool.” You rush to say, puffing out your cheeks in mild embarrassment. Nanami feels something tighten in his chest as he nods, stepping away from Gojo who's now complaining about the attack that didn't even hurt him. 

He steps closer, looking down at you. You watch as his jaw clenched, hands tightening around his glasses, the rain drops sliding down his cheeks to his perfect jawline. “Forgive me for not remembering you.” He nearly whispers. “You’re one of Shoko's' friends, yes?”

You nod your head, a shy smile taking place instead of the somber feeling you oozed earlier. “No, no it's okay, Mr. Nanami. I was a year below you, then you left not long after I came to the school.”  Pausing you look to the side, a little sheepish. “ And yes, I work closely with Shoko.”

“I see.” So they were here when I ran away, Nanami thinks as he takes in the shape of you. You stand there with a certain air about you. Like you know your place in the world well, that you've accepted how the course of your life will go.

I’ll run a curse blade through my heart before I’d ever listen to them and marry you.

Your words come back to his mind, and he quickly re-evaluates his last thought. Perhaps you've accepted your place, but it seems you have yet to stop fighting for what you want. 

“Did you not have an umbrella?” You ask him, before digging into your bag and handing him a blue folded one. Nanami raises a brow, looking at the dry umbrella to the soaked clothes clinging to your skin.

“I don't usually carry one.” Nanami answers. “Did you forget yours was in your bag?”

“No, I love the rain.” You lean up, whispering like it's some sort of secret. Nanami's mind nearly blanks at how close you are and how good you suddenly smell. “Take it, Mr. Nanami. For next time.” You say, grabbing his arm to turn his palm to the sky to set the umbrella in his hand.

Nanami opens his mouth to protest on taking your property but you're already moving down the steps as a sleek black car pulls up. A man in traditional clothing comes out to open the door for you, bowing slightly. You nod to the man, then look back to Nanami and Gojo.

With a small wave, the door slams shut and you're gone, leaving only an umbrella and a few past memories Nanami couldn’t remember behind.

“Oh boy! Do I smell love in the air?” Gojo laughs, pushing his glasses up his nose bridge. Nanami does not dignify him with an answer, simply opening the umbrella and walking to finish his work day. Of course, Gojo tags along smiling like a Cheshire cat. 

“She simply caught my eye.” Nanami says when they make it back inside. Gojo simply pats his back, before turning to run off to do God knows what. 

⋆.ೃ࿔⛈ ݁ ˖*༄    

That simple boring conversation with Nanami stayed tucked neatly in the back of your mind as the June weeks slowly passed to July ones. There was nothing special about the words exchanged between the two of you. No new revelations, no love at first sight. 

Yet you couldn't get that look on his face out of your mind. 

You stayed busy regardless of your clouded thoughts as there were plenty of things to be done on the Kiyomi Estate.

Unlike the Zenin's or the Gojo's, the Kiyomi’s were more of a laid-back family when it came to certain things. There was no power struggle, no money issues, only set expectations everyone with a drop of Kiyomi blood was expected to follow. 

The Kiyomi’s respected the course of nature. The soft and warm, the sick and deadly. The elders were not afraid of the new generations to come. There wasn't a word spoken of the new age, it was a known fact deep in their souls. 

For the world always changes when things become too comfortable. Nature always evolves, and humans always die. 

“Y/N!”

You look up from the hole you were digging, dirt collecting on your clothes and staining your hands. A young teen boy comes your way, Megumi with his familiar deadpan look on his face carrying a plastic bag. He’s Satoru’s ward, a project of sorts that Satoru loves to tell you about. Soon he will be a first year at Jujutsu Tech, meaning your days of doing Satoru’s job of caring for the boy are coming to an end.

Smiling as the young teenager approached, you dust your hands off on your pants, rising to greet him. “Megumi, what brings you here?” You ask, watching as Megumi makes it to you, sighing at your question. He steps closer, halting at the sight of the six-foot hole before flicking his gaze back up to you.

“Stupid Gojo told me to bring these souvenirs to you from his mission” Megumi explains, handing off the bag while side eyeing the hole. Or perhaps the corpse that lies close to the hole and unplanted flowers. 

“Of course he did.” You smile, taking the bag and looking inside at an array of sweets. “He really shouldn't waste his money on such things.” 

“I doubt he even checks prices before swiping.” Megumi huffs, crossing his arms. His eyes fall to the corpse again, but you pretend not to notice. The man looked to be older, semi decayed and clearly ready for a proper burial. Whatever got to him and ended his life did it brutally, given the stitches holding certain parts back together.

“Who's that?”

“A criminal who was brought to justice.” You explain without hesitation, setting the bag down before glancing to the body. “Unclaimed body from the morgues. Shoko suspects he was a curse user. I am returning him to nature so that he may come back as something better.”

Megumi takes a moment to absorb the words you tell him before nodding. It's nothing new when it comes to the Kiyomi's. Every flower patch here is someone who has lived a life before. From unclaimed criminals, to sorcerers who’ve met their fate, their bodies rest here when no one else takes them.

Whatever can be salvaged of them at least.

For a brief moment you wonder if you should make the young boy go inside to not see this, but you know his future work will show him much worse things. Inside you hope you'll be dead before his body comes here to rest.

Megumi moves to the hole, grabbing one of the shovels to help dig before you can ask what he’s doing. You smile at his kind offer to help, and fall into quick work of burying the man. After the corpse is buried and flowers are planted on top, he takes his leave without a single word.

Your next distraction comes in the form of Nanami himself, though this time it was not the thought of him. He's in the garden, walking with his suit jacket tucked neatly in his arm as the clan leader, your grandfather, rambles to him about the Kiyomi ways. 

Finishing the last flower in the arrangement on top of the criminal's final resting place, you stand to make your way to greet them. Bowing as they approach, your grandfather lets out a joyful laugh, echoing throughout the land.

“This here is my lovely grandchild Y/N. Do forgive her appearance, they work hard in these fields putting the dead to rest.” He says happily, waving his wrinkled hands in front of his face.

Nanami nods, before bowing to you slightly. “Forgive my interruption. I came here to ask some questions about the curse user you've just laid to rest.”

“What sort of things would I know?” You ask, watching paint as he stands straight up and fiddles with his tie. Nanami clears his throat before glancing at your grandfather who's taking notes on the flowers nearby instead of listening to the conversation.

“The man's cursed energy, I was told by Shoko that it seemed off. I'm afraid he may..well you know..” He looks back to you, making sure to make direct eye contact as he pulls your blue umbrellas from his arms, handing it back to you. 

“And I wanted to return this.” Nanami says, watching every move you make. You feel the urge to smile, but hold it back to instead nod, taking the umbrella gingerly from his large hands. Your fingers brush and it's like you were suddenly set on fire. 

“Thank you, Mr. Nanami, but I could have sworn I meant for you to keep this.”

“Perhaps I wanted to see you.” He retorts back, making your cheeks warm slightly.

Your grandfather stiffens up, looking between the two of you with a knowing smile. Fighting the urge to roll your eyes, you clear your throat pointedly to the old man. “Oh! Well, look at the time, I've got to head back inside to work.” he says cheerily, leaving you both on the garden path. 

Turning on your heel, you gesture for Nanami to walk with you. Instantly he falls right into step at your side, like there was nowhere else for him to be. “You didn't have to go through all the trouble. How did you even find me?”

Nanami hums, pushing his dress shirt sleeves up slightly and adjusting the jacket in his arms. “The Kiyomi estate isn't hard to find…..and I asked Shoko.” Nanami tells you, looking at the many flowers instead of you. 

You giggle in response, grinning as you look at the side of his face. 

“Why are you here, Mr. Nanami? Surely, you're aware of the gossip in jujutsu society right now.”

“I'm well aware you’re on the cusp of an engagement to that idiot.” Nanami tells you bluntly, stopping in his tracks. You follow along, letting him step to face you. “I dislike the higher ups and the clans who force such things. No, I actually hate them. I hate all sorcerers too.”

Pausing for a moment to find the right words, Nanami runs his hand on his jaw before looking you in the eyes. Even through his tinted glasses, you could see it clearly. The bit of nerves, the longing to be understood. The acceptance of what this world is.

“I didn't come back to be their dog. I came back to do what little good I can. Correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel you are the same way.” 

Humming in thought, you put your hands behind your back and look up to the sky. Closing your eyes at the feel of the summer breeze, you let this wonderfully complex man sit in silence. 

“My job, Mr. Nanami, isn’t to kill curses. As a Kiyomi, I am here to bring a balance to this world. A new age is coming, and I fully intend to protect the generations to come. To plant trees and flowers that I’ll never come to see.” You speak, before cutting yourself off with a small sigh, looking back at Nanami. “I don't play by sorcerer rules. I'm not that kind of person, and I'll never be.”

Nanami nods, swallowing roughly. “You’ll plant flowers at my grave then?”

“No. You will become a wonderful tree. A protector from the sun and harsh rain. A provider, something solid, long lasting.” 

He reaches out for your hand, hesitant to touch. You're almost worried he'd be put off by the dirt and calluses that were on your skin. Nanami simply brushed the mess, before bringing your hand to his lips for a soft gentle kiss against your skin.

“Miss Y/N, would you join me for dinner this Saturday?”

A pretty smile graces your lips, then slowly turns to a teasing grin. “Only if you bring an umbrella. I hear it's forecast to rain.” 

Nanami grins, letting your hand go. “I'm starting to like the rain.”

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[whimsicalcrying]

The Shades of You & Me

Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki x Midoriya Izuku

Summary: Pro hero Dynamight, Bakugou Katsuki joins Izuku and class 2-A on their winter training camp in the snowy mountains. Chaos ensues.

w/c: 3.5k

a/n: This was posted on my Ao3 but i wanted it here as well! I honestly really love this fic, so please let me know if you'd like more of this.

As always, feedback is always helpful and appreciated!

Ao3 M.List ch.1 ch.2 ch.3

!Warnings!: Mild angst, mentions of death, mentions of war, aftereffects of war.

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It was cold.

So fucking cold.

Katsuki bit his tongue as he used both of his hands to roughly snap any lifeless branches off of the trees in his way. He practically stormed through the trees, his feet heavy with the deep snow and ice, wearing that usual glare on his face.

He scans everything in sight, the dead trees, rocks, even the snow for any signs of the brat

Nothing.

They've found nothing so far and it's taking its toll on Izuku who looks three seconds away from having a stroke. The more Izuku frets, the angrier Katsuki feels.

Everything about this situation has piled up, making it nearly impossible for him to keep his cool, but Katsuki tries. 

He really really tries, but he can't keep his mouth shut.

“I know you're stupid Deku, but thinking you can't protect your kids?” He mutters, snapping another branch roughly just for the hell of it. Izuku sighs, deflating further as he carefully follows Katsuki’s war torn path dodging the branches he tosses away.

“You said we'd talk about this later.” Izuku points out, dragging his feet. It only earns a loud scoff from Katsuki, and a nasty glare shot behind his shoulder.

“It is later, nerd.” he says, stopping in his tracks to glare at the stressed man.

“You really think that low of yourself? You do realize you regularly train with top heroes still? You do shit normal civilians can't even think of.” 

Izuku doesn't say anything in response, walking past him as if he didnt hear a single thing.

Katuski huffs, quickly moving to follow.

“What got nothing to say?” Katsuki taunts, letting his hands heat up as he purposely knocks down icicles hanging off branches. He really wants to reach into Izuku's mind and punch away every insecure thought the nerd has.

They find a clearing with a couple cut down trees, their stumps barely visible but still there. Izuku turns to face him and makes Katsuki instantly feel like an ass when he sees the look in the man's eyes.

“You know that I always wanted to be a hero…” Izuku says, stepping forward to Katsuki’s frozen state “I'm trying to be grateful I even had the chance to do what I did…but the absence of what I felt when I had all of that power…it's scary. Really scary.” He admits, looking down

“I don't have anything special to protect them. No fire, no super speed, no explosions….. I don't even know if I should be their teacher! What good am I at teaching them to use their quirks, to be good heroes when I was only truly one for less than two years?”

“Shut the fuck up, Izuku.” Katsuki snaps, not meaning to be as rough, but he can't control it.

There are a million things he thinks he could say. Millions of assurances, promises that Izuku isn't as frail as he sees himself. I can't be the one to tell him all of that, Katsuki thinks, reaching out to Izuku. 

His gloved hand connects to Izuku’s jaw, making the man look up at him. He isn't surprised by Katsuki's tone or touch, just watching with those sad eyes that makes Katsuki’s knees buckle.

“Dont say things that aren't fucking true. You really think Nezu and Aizawa would let your lame ass teach if they didn't think you could do it? Get over yourself.”

A small laugh comes from Izuku, and he pulls his face away, bringing an arm up to rub his eyes for a moment. “I lost a student.” He whines which makes Katsuki roll his eyes, moving to the next opening into the trees.

“Yeah, well we all fucking lost her. We could have used her footprints if we knew she was gone earlier. That fucking idiot was sleeping instead of doing his job” Katsuki mutters, adding a few more colorful words about the snow hero under his breath.

Izuku follows, scanning the white area trying to get used to the brightness from the sun reflecting on the snow and ice.

“Hey kacchan, don't those branches look broken?” Izuku speaks up, walking to a small drop off of shrub and ice.

The branches are snapped, looking similar to the ones Katsuki murdered on his march forward.

Walking to stand next to Izuku, he bends, peering down the small snow slide. “Do you think she fell? We should go check.”

Izuku nods and pats Katuki’s back. He stays silent for a beat, before humming and pushing his palm forward, shoving Katsuki down the small snow hill.

He tumbles into the snow, letting out curses as Izuku just watches, carefully making his own way down with a little innocent grin on his scarred lips.

Innocent my ass, Katsuki thinks as he glares at him from the snow. Standing up, his gloved hands roughly flinging the snow off himself onto Izuku and anything nearby.

“The fuck was that for Izuku?” He huffs. Izuku shrugs, not answering him. Am I getting the silent treatment? Katsuki wonders, following the taller man with a half glare and pout. 

Successfully ignoring Katsuki, Izuku looks around for clues on where Hayami went. Down the small hill, there's signs someone else, animal or human, have been messing around. Broken branches and messed up snow.

Scanning the bright snow and dark dead trees, Izuku gently pats around the snow, hoping she isn't trapped in a pile of snow. 

Katsuki does the same, following Izuku’s lead. The two search for a couple of hours until Izuku finds a shoe, then looks up, half worried and relieved to see Hayami found some sort of shelter on a tree branch, the one above blocking the snow from getting on her. 

“Hayami! Thank goodness you're safe.” Izuku says, reaching out to the girl. She curls into herself, not wanting to be taken from the branch, her new so-called safe haven. 

“Go away, Mr. Midoriya. I don't want to go back to camp.” She mutters, swatting his hands away, making sure not to make contact like the other night. It’s clear she doesn’t want her quirk to go off again.

Katsuki watches Izuku pause, his brain likely going over millions of scenarios about what to do or what might happen if she kept refusing to go back to camp. His whole body flinches when Izuku twists around without warning, giving him that look.

The look that clearly said, fix this right now, kacchan.

Clearing his throat he steps forward, unsure how to get the brat to even look at him, let alone uncurl from her protective stance. Maybe I was too hard on her, he thinks as he inspects the situation, trying to think of the right words to say.

But are there right things to say about things like this? He's not a teacher, not a parent. Honestly, he's not even sure if he could care less about this brat who's throwing a fit about being told off.

Then he remembers he would have most likely done the same thing in middle school. Katuski gets flashes from all the times he locked himself away from his classmates who were putting him in his place, and lifting Izuku into his.

Sighing, he peels his mask off, shoving it into his pocket.

“Move over kid.” He huffs, grabbing onto the branch and swinging himself up next to her. Hayami eyes him, trying to hide the puffy eyes and flushed cheeks from the cold. 

Stupid girl, He thinks, reaching out to pat her leg as gently as possible to not trigger her quirk.

“I used to hurt a lot of people with my quirk.��� He says, letting the truth settle between them.

“In fact, I was a whole lot like you. That's why I got onto you. You're better than someone who should be acting like that. Maybe I’m projecting, who the hell knows kid, but I do know that when people bring others down it’s because they aren't feeling too good either. Bullshit you know?” 

“Everyones so good at following instructions ... .I've got the power but I can't control anything.” Hayami sniffles, burying her face further into her knees.

Katsuki nods, glancing over to Izuku who's awkwardly trying to look like he's not eavesdropping on the two of them. “They're so good, and I’m…so me.”

“Some people are good naturally, and some are rougher like us.” Katsuki says. “You need both types to save people, kid. Just like how you have to practice combat, you got to practice playing nice with your teammates ... .hell even those who aren't your teammates.”

“You can put that frustration into becoming a better student, a better person, a better hero.” Izkuku finally adds something, reaching up from the ground to gently slip her shoe back on with a gentle smile.

Hayami sniffles and looks down at her teacher then to Katsuki. For some reason, seeing their words settle over the girl makes the weight lift off Katsuki’s shoulders. 

She's got the push, now she's gotta make the effort.

“Come on, kid.” Katuski says, putting his mask back on and jumping down. Landing next to Izuku, both men look at the girl, waiting to see if anything resonated. To see if she’ll willingly return back to her class.

“Hayami, your friends are worried. Come on, let's go back to camp.” Izuku says, reaching his hand out once more. Katsuki loses his breath when she reaches out, allowing Izuku to help her out of the tree. 

Even brats are willing to take his hand, the gentle and warmth from Izuku just radiates safety and comfort. The same feelings Katsuki remembers feeling when he saw All Might on tv or in class.

How can you say you're not a hero, Izuku? Katsuki thinks as he follows behind them as the smiling hero leads his student back to camp. 

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The rest of the camp was a complete disaster with Mr. Frost being the only instructor for approximately two hours.

In two hours, the students threw a coup, trapped the man in a hole, and took over the camp using their quirks to spar each other instead of following Izuku’s detailed training plan.

Katsuki would have laughed if he didn't want to murder the dumbass for letting Izuku's students run wild.

Of course, Izuku tries not to look pissed, but between the forced smile and the twitching brow, it was clear their happy go lucky teacher was fully about to lose his shit on the snow hero. 

So with a small quick meeting with Aizawa, camp was sort of cut short. The students and three heroes end up getting a chance to stay at a nice hotel in the town for the remaining night.

Luckily the students wanted some warmth instead of their ice-cold tents, and Izuku needed a break from the camp. 

“Is your licence even updated? Have you ever fucking spoke to a teenager in you life before this? Do you have a brain?” Katsuki growls as he questions Mr.Frost, his fingers digging into the hero's cheeks as he roughly holds the mans face.

The poor man got caught in the explosion heroes hold. Izuku made the mistake of leaving them in the teacher's room alone to go deal with the students and their rooms.

Of course he took the moment to strike.

Mr. Frost blubbers, trying desperately to explain himself and the entire situation. All Katsuki could hear was excuses excuses excuses excuses. Scoffing, he shoves the man back, looking at his own hand in disgust, wiping it off with a towel. 

Disgusting man, the man who wants to take Izuku out, can't even watch Izuku's students. Like hell he'd ever let this man stay in their lives.

“I’m truly sorry, I'm not experienced with kids.” He tries to explain again as Katsuki starts to lounge on one of the futons, ignoring the man. “And I didn't know you and Mr.Midoryia were together, I wouldn't have come if I knew Mr.Midoryia wasn't single-”

“Hah?” Katsuki interrupts, his scathing glare back on the snow hero. Mr.frost flinches, scared he's said the wrong thing now. “The fuck you mean not single?” 

Well aren't you and Mr….” Mr.Frost starts, trailing off as he connects dots in his mind, his mouth falling open as he realises he got the wrong idea. I mean, who can blame the poor man? They act like a married couple. “You're not his boyfriend?” 

“No.” Katsuki snaps and looks back to the window. “Not yet. So piss off and mind your own business.”

Not yet?

Why the fuck did he say not yet?

As far as Katuski knows he's got no plans to be Izuku's boyfriend so why did that spill out from his own mouth? Maybe the cold really got to him and his brain is fucked. Yeah, totally the reason. He doesn't give Mr. Frost a chance to say anything else, gathering himself up to go patrol the halls. 

And he does patrol the halls, stomping up and down them each hour just to make sure all the brats know they're still in trouble for not following their teachers rules and overthrowing a grown ass man that was supposed to watch them. Even if Katsuki found it hilarious they did that to the loser.

“Serves him right.” He grumbles, stopping at a vending machine, looking over the options, specifically low fat and low sugar. He's always taken his diet and food intake seriously, knowing a hero needs to be at top physical health to do their best. Of course, there's not much luck in a random tourist trap hotel, but he settles on something not too bad. 

Opening the can, he takes a sip while glancing at the clock, noting the late time. Izuku is probably back in the room with Mr. Frost, probably reassuring the guy that he's not a complete failure. Scoffing at the thought, he chugs the drink and roughly throws it into the trash. 

It doesn't matter, I'm not his boyfriend.

Stomping his way back to the teachers room, he hears the familiar tone of Hayami, abruptly stopping at the corner.

He knows he should get onto them for being out of their rooms, but then the words he hears falling from the brats lips makes him wait.

“I'm sorry for pushing both of you like I've been.” She mumbles, looking up at the other two brats sheepishly.

“We are all trying to get better and be great heroes…. I'm going to learn how to be more patient and a team player. Please- please let me have the chance to change!” She bows, making the two boys blink in surprise, looking at each other before smiling at her. 

“Don't bow Hayami. We understand and we will work hard to.” Higurashi says, gently tapping her head while Kimura nods excitedly. “Yeah and one day we’ll be the best trio of heroes there is!”

Katsuki fights the urge to smile, feeling a weird sense of pride that the three troublemaking brats seem to have a new fire lit under them.

It feels good knowing that he may have helped kids without them being in danger. That he helped some brats with life. Maybe this is why Izuku likes this job.

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It’s nearly seven in the morning when Katsuki wakes up in a cold sweat, instantly patting around for his anchor to this world, Izuku. Not finding him near, Katsuki sits up, remembering he's not at their apartments, but in a stuffy room with a whole other person. 

Blinking, his eyes adjust to the low light. He frowns when he sees only Mr.frost is in the room with him, thus setting on the search for Izuku.

Sneaking out of the room was easy, the same for the halls looking for any signs of the scarred man Katsuki desperately needed to see. It's not like he wanted to see him just to see him.

Katsuki needs to know that he's real and the only thing that makes him feel real is the rough pads of Izuku's hands. The green eyes that constantly look into his soul and remind him he isn't sixteen and helpless anymore.

He's not near the vending machines or around the baths. Taking a chance, Katsuki makes his way to the roof, aware of the large viewing deck the hotel seemingly advertises every second they can get.

Katsuki makes his way through the darkness, and frowns when he steps into the cold air, his breath already visible as he steps toward Izuku’s hunched over figure that sits on the railing. 

His eyes are closed, hiding those green eyes Katsuki needs to see right now. But the sight of his head tilted up, almost enjoying the disgustingly cold weather, gives Katsuki enough comfort not to yank Izuku back to the room to go back to sleep before they have to deal with all the brats on the ride home.

“Izuku.” He says, hating how rough his voice sounds despite the aching need he has to be gentle to the man in front of him.

“Izuku..” he tries again, clenching his fist when there's not a change in tone. Izuku turned his head, giving Katsuki a warm smile. He never seems mad when Katsuki invades his space.

Hell, they both know Izuku practically invites him. He gives Katsuki a reason to stand close, to come home and sit on that stupid couch.

Taking the silent invite, Katsuki plants himself right next to Izuku, looking up at the horizon that's barely starting to glow.

"Bad dream?” Izuku asks, moving his hand so it brushes against katsukis cold ones.

Katsuki grunts, not bothering to deny that's the only reason he's up and looking for him. Izuku nods, now watching Katsuki and not the sun. He's always watching me, Katsuki notes, turning to meet his gaze.

“What are you doing out here?”

“I wanted to watch the sunrise.” Izuku admits, turning back to the horizon. “And I needed some time to think about our talk in the mountains.” 

Katsuki sucked in the cold air, turning his gaze to the sky to avoid looking at Izuku. Yeah, he felt a little bad for being so pissed off at the worries Izuku was feeling. He just can't understand why he'd think that about himself.

And worse, he knows deep down he's one of the reasons Izuku feels that way. No matter how many times he can say he forgives him, Katsuki knows that he fucked Izuku up at least a little bit during middle school.

I'm so fucking stupid, he thinks, looking at his legs that dangle off the balcony. 

“I think you're still a hero, Izuku.” Katsuki says as softly as he can, trying to keep the shame and anger down. He swallows. “You're a damn good teacher and these brats clearly mean something to you…but to me you are a hero first and always.”

“You really see me like that?” Izuku asks, looking right at Katsuki. He nods, trying to fight the urge to meet Izuku's eyes. He can't.

It would be the end of the discussion, and they need to keep this going. Maybe Katsuki would have the courage to ask what he's been wanting to ask. 

“Kacchan…”

“Seriously Izuku, you're a hero to a lot of people. To me.”

Izuku turns his head to the other side, and Katsuki feels the nerves settle in his stomach. The bastard is clearly trying not to cry, which Katsuki knows is a good thing. His words reached, just like they reached those brats. 

Reaching out, Katsuki brushes his cold fingers along Izuku's jaw, tugging his head to look at him. He's met with watery green eyes, and he's very aware of his quick heartbeat. “Join my agency. Be a hero with me. Stay with me.” 

It feels like begging, and perhaps it is. The words feel too right, yet so soft he can't believe that they actually come from him. Stay. stay.

Katsuki has been wanting to ask for so long, knowing he doesn't deserve Izuku's time and efforts. They had a whole childhood together and he wasted it. How dare he ask for the rest of Izuku's time?

Yet Izuku lets some tears fall, nodding in conformation. The anxiety in his gut fades, and he nods back, trying to contain the stupid feelings bubbling up.

Izuku grabs Katsuki’s cold hands, gently prying them from his jaw and intertwining them as they look to the sun that slowly rises in pinks and oranges. 

There's snow everywhere, and they could still see their breath, but Katsuki has never felt so warm in his life. Izuku squeezes his hand, making him look over to be met with that smile. Katsuki can't help but grin back.

“What nerd?”

“Nothing, I just love you, Kacchan.” 

Katsuki only has time to barely roll his eyes before his view is blocked by dark green curls and the scarred skin of Izuku's face.

Izuku leans up, gently pushing his lips to Katsuki's a little too roughly, so much so their teeth hit. He doesn't mind the pain or enthusiasm; he's finally got something he doesn't want to let go off.

Pulling apart, Katsuki pants, hoping to God he's not as flushed as the nerd is. Looking down at their hands, he thinks about how to respond to the gift he's just been given.

Only one thing comes to mind, and it's what Izuku Midoriya deserves.

“I love you too, Izuku.”

*｡❅*⋆⍋✧ ✦ ✧⍋⋆*❅｡*

[whimsicalcrying]

The Shades of You & Me

Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki x Midoriya Izuku

Summary: Pro hero Dynamight, Bakugou Katsuki joins Izuku and class 2-A on their winter training camp in the snowy mountains. Chaos ensues.

w/c: 3.8k

a/n: This was posted on my Ao3 but i wanted it here as well! I honestly really love this fic, so please let me know if youd like more of this.

As always, feedback is always helpful and appreciated!

Ao3 M.List ch.1 ch.2 ch.3

!Warnings!: Mild angst, mentions of death, mentions of war, aftereffects of war.

*｡❅*⋆⍋✧ ✦ ✧⍋⋆*❅｡*

Christmas eve and Christmas day, Katsuki had the holiday patrols stolen out from underneath his feet by dunce face of all people.

He huffed and puffed about it, but the schedules were out, and Katsuki had to kiss that holiday bonus goodbye. 

It didn't matter that he looked like one of the ghosts in the Christmas carol. It didn't matter that a part of him was kind of happy about the situation, happy he can get a break. But even when off work, there’s no breaks on Christmas. 

Izuku and Katsuki had three places to hit all in the same day. The first was Mr. Aizawa house, to drop Eri's perfectly wrapped Christmas present off.

The second was to pick up Izuku’s mother, and the third was the Bakugou residence. 

Katsuki didn't mind coming home; in fact, it gave him some sort of peace seeing his folks still comfortable and enjoying their lives. They keep working, even though they have the means to retire. After his project for Izuku, he wants to pay their bills.

He silently pictures that, as he watches everyone else pass food around the table, happily chatting away about the updates in each other's lives.

The night ends in a blanket of snow, starting the battle Katsuki must face due to the weather. 

Then six days later, he was in his hero suit freezing his ass off as he watched Izuku file in a bunch of brats on the bus. God, he hated that he agreed to this. He had already taken some medicine for his upcoming headache.

The kids are already yapping about the trip, talking about how easy and fun the experience will be and all the pictures they will take of the snowy mountains.

Yeah right. Katsuki grins, following Izuku up onto the bus. There’s not a chance in hell Izuku and Aizawa would plan an easy trip for UA students. 

“Alright, we’ve got quite a trip ahead of us. Bathroom breaks are each hour, and please let me know if anyone is feeling sick.” Izuku calls out, barely heard over the chatter. “And keep your voices down please!”  

“Yes sir!”

“We will be quiet!” 

“Kay!” 

A bunch of them call out yet still go back to exactly what they were doing before. Izuku smiles, letting out a small sigh before taking a seat. Katsuki follows his lead, sitting down and turning to look over the brats, noting their distinct looks and friend groups.

“Your troublemakers come?” He asks in a low tone, making Izuku chuckle. Katsuki watches him lean back into the seat, trying to take in the warmth of the bus's heater while they have the chance.

The two spent days going over Izuku’s plans for class 2-A and what he wants them to learn being in the snow mountains of kamikochi were long, but Izuku prepared Katsuki for exactly what he wanted to get done on this trip.

Part of it is of course, learning how to use your quirk in different climates. The other lesson is one in teamwork, something this class 2-A struggles with greatly.

Izuku nods, glancing over to the seat that sits a group of three students. “Yes, Kimura, Higurashi and Hayami are all here. It’s best to keep a close eye on Hayami, she’s the leader of the group.”

Katsuki nods, looking for the little brat who's been causing Izuku trouble since the start of her first year.

Hayami was small for a seven-teen year old but has built up some muscle in her arms. Based on the nerds' midnight rantings about the girl and her two goons, Katsuki learned her quirk is very inconvenient for herself and others.

Shock clap.

Any time she hits her hands or smacks her hand against something, all the energy in her body pulls out and combusts. It's like Katsuki’s explosions without the burning. It's more dangerous due to the abrupt light it gives off and the energy waves that follow.

Her goons, two boys who are at the top of Izuku's class, are fairly well behaved when not following Hayami.

Kimura’s quirk is snake, giving him the ability to adapt snake attributes and turn into one if needed. Kimura has a poison in his fangs that could kill an elephant.

Higurashi was the tamer of the two, but just as deadly. His quirk thorns gave him the ability to summon large thorns from the ground. He often uses them as swords or daggers, or things to jump off of when pursuing someone.

You'd think with the potential they'd have, they take their classes more seriously as second years, but their main interests involve making things hard for teachers and heroes that try to mentor them. 

The bus stops for its second bathroom break, right on the edge of the mountains. The students file out, confused on why the bus is parked on the side of the road and not a gas station.

“Alright brats, get into groups.” Katsuki grumbles, crossing his arms as they give him confused puppy-like looks, though he won't fall for the innocent kid act. No teenager is innocent.

First, the students go to their friends, which is exactly what Izuku wants. This trip is not only for them to learn how to deal with freezing temps, but to see if they know how to rely on each other for support.

None of them have thought to strategize who they picked, a mistake on their part they’d possibly regret.

Izuku comes back with seven tents and a bunch of gear packs for the students. The slow realization that this is where training starts dawns on them like a bucket of cold water being thrown on them.

The bus door closes, making its way down the road, ignoring the few students attempting to get back on, chasing it.

“Everyone takes a pack and make sure your group has a tent. Today we will start with basic surveillance and survival.” Izuku smiles, stepping back from the group of teens.

“Inside each bag is a map of where UA set a base camp. You have until…” He looks at the watch on his wrist. “Let's go with five. You have till five to make it back or you lose. If Kacchan finds you first, a punishment awaits.” Izuku smiles, popping a flare. 

“Good luck and remember your training!”  He smiles as they all take off, scared of this so-called punishment. There are rounds of complaints as they run off to look through their bags.

Some don't even check what they have, taking off into the snowy mountain. Katsuki sighs, as the last straggler, Kimura calls out for the other two troublemakers to wait up.

“Well! You handled that perfectly, Mr. Midoriya.” Katsuki's other annoyance speaks, pulling up in his stupid fancy car, rolling the window down to smile at the two heroes.

The other hero here to help with the training program, Mr. Frost, a snow hero from Canada. 

There was nothing particularly wrong with the man, other than the fact he was constantly trying to show off how rich he is and telling Izuku how much he'd love going to Canada to visit and all the restaurants he could take him to.

Of course, the nerd is too blind to see the man has blatantly flirted with him the entire time they were going over the training plans. 

He didn't even come on the bus, Katsuki thinks, watching the tall man exit from the car.

Long dark hair, pale skin and bright blue eyes. It makes sense that the man is popular, he even is held in high regard for his actual work, working up on ski slopes and snowy areas, saving civilians trapped in snow.

Izuku smiles, nodding to the man and walking over. “Oh, Mr. Frost! I'm so glad you were able to come work with my students. Both Kacchan and I.” He tells the snow hero the biggest lie.

Katsuki felt there was no need for this man at all, but Aizawa insisted on two instructors and a team on standby.

Mr. Frost smiles back, cutting a glance to Katsuki before leading Izuku to his car. “It's a pleasure really, I saw what you did for the world all those years ago, you know. Come, let's get to the meeting spot.” 

“Oh well...” Izuku stammers at the mention of the past war.

Katsuki grits his teeth, walking to the edge of the road, with no intention of riding in that man's stupid fancy car. “I'll meet you there.” He grumbles.

“I’ve got brats to hunt.” 

Izuku looks back quickly, trying to meet Katsuki’s eyes but Katsuki doesn't turn to see the look on his face. There's no way in hell he's going to sit through Izuku being flirted with by a dumbass like that.

Disgusting.

“Give them some time, kacchan!” Izuku reminds him before he jumps off the side, already headed into the woods to hunt.

*｡❅*⋆⍋✧ ✦ ✧⍋⋆*❅｡*

The students that managed to stay out of Katsuki’s grasp make it back right at sunset, dragging their feet and looking worse for wear.

Katsuki tries to hide his grin, watching the kids come through to the clearing one by one to see their fellow classmates sitting in their circle of shame. 

Izuku spent the past three hours fretting over his brats, like he hasn't taught them the most important survival techniques known to man.

To distract himself, he ended up giving the captured students a random lesson on evading enemies.

The frost freak takes the class roster, calling out names and letting first aid go to a few of them that have some scratches or bruises. Izuku instructs the kids on how to set up the tents, and the last bit of sunlight is used to its fullest potential.

Katsuki rubs his cold hands together, thankful for the heaters made for his winter hero costume.

Stacking the sticks, he starts a fire quickly, glancing around to see which students need help. He walks around, boot crunching in the snow, snapping dead twigs that manage not to be hidden.

“You, what's your quirk?” he asks one of the troublemakers. Higurashi looks up, alarmed he's being spoken to by Dynamight. He stammers, looking around before coming closer to speak. 

“My quirk is thorns. I…summon thorns.” He answers, looking for his two friends, but Katsuki snaps his fingers in front of the boy's face to keep the boy's attention.  

“Are they flammable?”

“I don’t know.”

“Come here.” Katsuki walks to the fire pit the boy's trouble making team was at, pointing to the little amount of wood they are trying to stack. “Summon small ones, twig size.” He demands, not bothering to ask if Higurashi can control the size of his thorns or not.

“Small ones….” Higurashi echoes, bending down to try. He tries again…. then again…and one more time. Katsuki just watches, face betraying nothing on what he's thinking.

He does almost feel a little bad when Higurashi shoots him an apologetic look, clearly embarrassed about not being able to control his quirk.

Hayami has had enough though, groaning loudly to get their attention in a way a toddler would. “I think he's tried enough. Let's just light what we have.” She says impatiently.

“No, he has to learn.” Katsuki says boredly.

There's a lesson each of these three troublemakers need to learn. Higurashi needs to learn to actually try , Kimura needs to stop following everything Hayami says, and Hayami needs to learn she's not the boss.

“He can learn tomorrow! We're coming in dead last!” Hayami snaps back, making Katsuki want to growl at the little girl who's acting like she's grown. He doesn't though, keeping that bored look on his face. 

“You can't be a hero if you're worried about being first or last. Support your teammate.” Katsuki says firmly. Hayami gapes at him, shooting him a glare before stomping off, cursing him under her breath.

A feeling creeps up in Katsuki’s gut as he remembers his past actions. How he acted towards Izuku and others, claiming he was the best. He also remembers the pain of realizing he wasn’t the best.

That he was under someone he fought so hard to keep beneath him.

If this trio keeps going the way they are, they'll get killed, that is for certain. So, Katsuki waits an hour.

Hayami goes to another team's fire pit, mad that their team is dead last in getting everything set up. Kimura is sitting, giving some encouraging words as Higurashi looks like he's about to burst into tears each failure he gets. 

“You've only focused on making your thorns big to use in combat, haven't you?” Katsuki asks after Higurashi promptly gives up. He plops on the ground, glaring at the empty fire pit. The shame of Katsuki figuring him out so easily hits and he folds into himself.

“I thought I only needed them to be big and strong.” He admits in a small murmur. 

Katsuki puts a hand on his shoulder, holding his palm out, setting off tiny pops in his hands. “When I was a brat like you, I did the same thing. The bigger the better I thought ... .but it wasn't. The more ways you can use your quirk the better. The more tools in your belt.” 

“How did you get them small then?”

“Practice.” Katsuki grins, standing up. “Come on, let's go get warm, kid.” 

Dinner was fine, everyone around their fire pits, as they handed out the food for the night. Katsuki plops down next to Izuku, handing him a bowl of rice before Mr. Frost shoves one he made into Izuku's hands. Izuku looks between the two men, as they shoot each other annoyed looks. 

“Thank you, Mr. Frost.” Izuku says, glancing over to Katsuki before looking at the rice in his bowl. Katsuki sighs, turning away. Izuku doesn't like his rice prepared that way and Katsuki doesn't want to see him force himself to eat it all to be polite. 

Which is exactly what he starts doing as he listens to Mr. Frost brag about some stupid mission he went on a while ago. 

Only two more days, Katsuki tells himself. Then we can go home back to our normal. 

Just me and Izuku.

“Why can't you stop dragging our team down! We are supposed to be winning!” Hayami yells, which catches all three heroes' attention.

Katsuki is almost thankful, so he doesn't have to listen to the same rescue story Mr. Frost has told five times already. Izuku hands the rice off, standing up to go to his students. 

“I'm sorry- I just- I don't understand why this has to be a competition.” Higurashi speaks.

Kimura is between the two, his head turning from side to side as he silently panics on what to do and what side to take.  

“It's a competition because we can't be left behind!” Hayami yells, raising a hand to hit. Izuku grabs her hand, her quirk setting off at the impact, sending a quick flash bang off.

Luckily everyone blocked their eyes quickly. Hayami steps back, eyes wide that her teacher just tanked the blow like it was nothing.

“I- I didn't-” She stammers, before turning to run off. Katsuki blocks her, she hits his chest, losing her balance and landing into the snow. Glaring down, with his arms crossed, he speaks plainly to the little girl.

“Acting like this will only make you end up alone and miserable. That's your friend, not your slave.” He growls, not caring for the tears in the girl's eyes or how embarrassing it must feel for her. It needed to be said, if not by him, then someone else. Even if he wasn’t gentle about it.

“Kacchan!” Izuku scolds at the way he spoke to the teen, but Katsuki doesn't care. 

Someone has to be honest.

“True heroes know how to work with their teams, not control them.” He keeps going as Hayami glares at him, tears in her big eyes.

Katsuki almost feels bad, even worried he might have made the situation worse, but she just gets up, storming off to her tent, while Kimura tries to aid Higurashi in calming down, offering reassurance. 

*｡❅*⋆⍋✧ ✦ ✧⍋⋆*❅｡*

The next morning just as the sun started to rise, Katsuki woke up from his freezing slumber, crawling out the tent to see another blanket of snow had fallen around them. Todays another long day of training the students. 

Izuku is awake, sitting on one of the makeshift benches with a small fire already made. Katsuki joins him on the bench, noticing the bags under his eyes and the signs the freckled man didn't sleep a wink. 

His hands itch to take Izuku's scarred ones, just to feel if they are warmer than his.

Reaching out, he lets his thumb brush against the side of Izuku's hand. On cue, Izuku lets his head rest on Katsuki’s shoulder as he looks out into the fire. 

“Do you still feel the embers?”

The words fall from his lips, breaking the silence of the mountains. Izuku nuzzles further into his shoulder, his face hidden in his green hair and the fabric of Katsuki’s hero costume. He nods, sighing softly. 

“Yeah, I feel them Kacchan.” 

“Dreams?”

“No, just normal stress.” Izuku answers, looking up. Katsuki makes the mistake of looking into his eyes.

This man is so many things. A hero, a teacher, a son, and a friend. His eyes are different shades of green rolled into one. Mini universes of plants and wildlife, a forest Katsuki feels himself constantly getting confused and lost in. 

He leans his head down, his forehead hitting Izuku’s. He doesn't know why he does this, being affectionate with Izuku after all they've been through. Sometimes it feels like he owes him this attention, this careful way of being cared for.

Sometimes he feels it's selfish. Selfish to hide what he really thinks of Izuku. For him to have this comfort after the years he spent hurting Izuku. The worst part is, he knows he's been forgiven. He knows Izuku would love to hear how much he cares about him. 

But Katsuki can’t bring himself to speak those words. He doesn’t have the right to.

Students start to come out from their tents for breakfast, Mr. Frost nowhere to be seen three hours into the day of the students training. Katsuki wants to kick that guy's ass for slacking, clearly only being here to flirt with Izuku, but he keeps his attention on what he is here for, to help Izuku's brats.

It was almost noon when Mr. Frost finally took the attendance to make sure everyone was accounted for. Izuku is speaking to a student, showing them how to do something when Katsuki overhears Mr. Frost's nervous request to speak to him. 

Katsuki stomps his way over, glaring at the snow hero. 

“A student is missing?” Izuku echos in horror, which makes Katsuki’s body go on high alert. Missing? It's barely been a day, and they've lost a student?

Izuku looks over at him, trying to reassure, even though he's clearly stressed as well. “Which student?” Izuku asks, trying to keep his composure.

“I believe it's Hayami.” Mr. Frost says.

Katsuki sets off explosions in his palms, the sound getting attention from the other students. His composure had finally snapped.

“You believe? Did you read the fucking list or not?” Katsuki snaps before he can stop himself.  Of course, that fucking brat ran off last night, Katsuki complains in his thoughts, already stomping off to go find her.

“Kacchan wait!” Izuku says, running to catch up to him, but Katsuki keeps walking. “We need a plan, she could be hurt or frozen out there.” He says, following Katsuki’s pace as they trudge through the deep snow.

“I have a plan.” Katsuki grumbles. “Me and that frost idiot will take each side. You stay and make sure the other brats are safe. There's no reason for you to go into the woods.”

“I can find my own student.” Izuku snaps, which makes Katsuki turn around, confused.

There's a look he hasn't seen in a minute besides their bickering about the apartment or dinner. Izuku is glaring at him, hurt and annoyed. 

But why? 

“Yeah, but you’re their teacher, so stay with them.” 

“You or Mr. Frost needs to stay with them.” Izuku persists. Katsuki shakes his head, hating it when Izuku hits another stubborn streak.

“And why would we need to do that? You can keep teaching, and you can protect-”

“And what if I can't!” Izuku snaps before taking a deep breath to compose himself. “I'm not a hero anymore Kacchan, I haven't fought villains in…in so long. I need someone powerful with them, someone with…with..”

“With a quirk.” Katsuki finishes with a frown.

The two stare at each other, letting it all settle in. Katsuki had known Izuku felt more defenseless than ever lately, but to fully admit to being scared he can't protect his own students?

How long has he been wallowing in this self-doubt? How could the greatest hero he's ever seen look so vulnerable and scared at the thought of not being strong enough? 

Katsuki feels his muscles pull tighter. He doesn't know what to do. He's not able to give reassurance like glasses or round face. He's nothing like shitty hair. 

If Kirishima were here, he’d probably try to hug Izuku , Katsuki thinks. 

“Don't worry Mr. Deku. You and I can go look for Hayami” Mr. Frost smiles, trying to comfort Izuku but it doesn't work. Right now, he's too upset to even send the man a polite smile or an answer. He keeps that green glare right on Katsuki.

Katsuki grabs his hand, tugging Izuku along. “No, you stay here Frost. The brats are waiting for your lesson on snow survival anyways. Plus, I got unfinished business with that brat.” He keeps walking as Mr. Frost blubbers about, trying to worm his way out of watching the group of teens.

“Kacchan…” Izuku mumbles, trying to get his hand from Katsuki’s hold, but he keeps it the further they get into the woods. “Kacchan.”

“Katsuki!”

Katsuki stops in his tracks, looking over his shoulder with narrowed eyes.  He hates hearing his real name from Izuku. “What?” 

“You're mad.”

“Damn right I'm mad.” Katsuki snaps, shooting Izuku a glare. Izuku huffs right back, crossing his arms. Katsuki misses the warmth his hand brought but won’t ask for it back. “Let's just find the kid and talk about that later.” 

“There's nothing to talk about.” Izuku lies to Katsuki and himself.  Both of them stand still for a beat, as the snow starts to fall once more. The girl should be top priority right now, they both know it.

So silently, they start their search for Hayami in the mountains, the unsettling feeling of an argument on the rise.

*｡❅*⋆⍋✧ ✦ ✧⍋⋆*❅｡*

[whimsicalcrying]

The Shades of You & Me

Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki x Midoriya Izuku

Summary: Pro hero Dynamight, Bakugou Katsuki joins Izuku and class 2-A on their winter training camp in the snowy mountains. Chaos ensues.

w/c: 3.1k

a/n: This was posted on my Ao3 but i wanted it here as well! I honestly really love this fic, so please let me know if youd like more of this.

As always, feedback is always helpful and appreciated!

Ao3

M.List ch.1 ch.2 ch.3

!Warnings!: Mild angst, mentions of death, mentions of war, aftereffects of war.

*｡❅*⋆⍋✧ ✦ ✧⍋⋆*❅｡*

Bakugou Katsuki has always had complicated feelings regarding the color green.

It was everywhere. From plants and trees to the vegetables Mitsuki threw in his dinner each night. At first, it was a calming, familiar color. Then, he met the living embodiment of green. 

Izuku Midoriya. 

Not only was he the familiar green, but he was also different shades Katsuki had never seen before. Green became simultaneously comforting, alarming, and so confusing.

Of course, being five and not knowing how to control your emotions didn't help the growing situation. 

Then Izuku kept coming back the more Katsuki pushed. The feelings piled up as each day passed. Each time Izuku acted so effortlessly brave, Katsuki fell deeper into his bubble of resentment and inferiority. 

It's like the world mocked him in their shades of green. 

His middle school self would mock him now. Mock him for finding comfort in those shades, comfort in the one thing he hated the most. Comfort in Izuku Midoriya.

Trauma has a funny way of staying inside a person. Katsuki can speak first-hand on the fact that dying fucking sucks.

Okay, maybe he's not handling all of that in the best ways, overworking himself, overcompensating for anything that has to deal with Izuku. 

But it's not the reason he agreed to be roommates with him, and it's definitely not the reason he is stomping his way to U.A. still in his hero uniform with Izuku's forgotten lunch in his grip. 

The confusing factor of the color green hasn't faded. Katsuki doubts it ever will. 

As much as he hates seeing Izuku be a teacher and not the hero he is supposed to be, Katsuki can admit he has a certain charm in how he goes about teaching those brats. He took being quirk less again far more differently than Katsuki had expected.

He had accepted it almost too quickly, too ready to move on like he wasn't one of the greatest heroes in the world. Like he didn't save Japan.

Katsuki clicks his tongue as he stops at the gate, digging in his pocket for his I.D. card. He flashes it with a bored expression, hardly waiting for the gates to fully open before stomping his way through.

It's second nature, his body moving to the 2-A classroom where Izuku is teaching a lecture to a bunch of second-year brats.

Sliding the door open roughly, he watches the man jump before he snaps his head to the door. The green in his eyes is dark until Izuku sees just who is interrupting, then lightens instantly at the sight of Katsuki. It makes his chest tighten in unexplainable ways.

"Kacchan!" Izuku smiles, setting down the papers he holds in his scarred hands.

The brats look up from their assignments, their greedy little eyes looking for anything to note between the two men. They were growing used to the Pro Hero Dynamight storming in on random occasions, always involving the two fussing over each other in different ways.

"You forgot your lunch again, dumbass." Katsuki growls, roughly pushing the lunch into Izuku's hands as Izuku smiles sheepishly. 

“Oh, thank you Kacchan! I didn’t even realize I'd forgotten it.”

“Course you didn’t, nerd.” Katsuki retorts, making sure to do their same old song and dance.

He hardly means the insults he says about his friends anymore, but old habits die hard. “You need to stop getting up late and rushing out the damn door.” he can't help but nag at the man in front of him.

Because that's what Izuku was now, a grown man. A terribly attractive grown man.

“Maybe sensei would learn his lesson if you stopped always bringing his lunch and interrupting our class time.” One of Izuku's students speaks, making Izuku and Katsuki snap their heads to her desk.

Hayami, one of Izuku’s special brats. His problem child.

“Yeah, well why don't you mind your own business kid.” Katsuki snaps back. Hayami scoffs as if he isn't one of the top twenty heroes. 

Fucking teenagers, Katsuki curses in his mind as she opens her mouth to speak again. Izuku is giving him that look, the reminder that this is his job, his students. Katsuki can do that. He can be calm; he's spent enough time in anger management to know this.

“Adults? I don’t think adults respond to Kacchan .” Hayami scoffs. “And stop flirting with our teacher. This is our learning time.”

Maybe his anger issues aren't getting any better. Katsuki grits his teeth, his hands shaking and sizzling, wanting to be released into a pop. “I’m not fucking flirting!” He snaps right as the bell rings.  

“Alright, that's the lunch bell!” Izuku smiles, holding his arm out to keep Katsuki from stomping over and blowing the girl's desk up. There's soft snickers amongst the students as they quickly scramble out for lunch. Izuku waves to them as they file out, reminding them of their next subject after lunch.

Once the door shuts, he turns back to Katsuki with a knowing look. But he doesn't know. Izuku has no idea the stress he constantly has him under. You should be a hero, not a teacher, Katsuki wants to say to him.

But Izuku can't help the cards that were dealt to him after the war. 

Katsuki swallows the words, instead saying. “I’ll be home late. Shitty hair and I have another meeting about the building.” Half-truth. In reality, that little meeting will take less than an hour, but he's picked up a double shift and will be patrolling til five in the morning.

Izuku's green eyes dim just a bit, and Katsuki wants to blow himself up. “I’ll take my break during dinner time.” 

Izuku nods, turning to jog down some papers he will most likely be up grading all night. “Right! I’ll make that curry, the one your mom gave the recipe for.” He says, now smiling to himself.

Small things like that seem to get the man to smile again. Katsuki doesn't get it, but if it takes anything off what Izuku is holding in, he'd do it. 

“Oh, before you go-” he starts right as Katsuki turns to leave. Izuku holds out an All Might themed umbrella. “It's going to rain a bit later, and Mr. Aizawa wants to speak with you.” 

“The old man? What does he want?” Katsuki questioned, taking the ugly umbrella without much fuss, knowing the little argument it would cause if he refused it. Plus, he hated the rain. 

Izuku shrugs, smoothing out his suit jacket before leaning on one of the desks. “Not sure, but i'd go see him now before you leave.” He grins. 

Lying bastard, he definitely knows something, Katsuki huffs in his thoughts before nodding and making his way out the door. 

It's been a long time since he's been asked to go to his former teacher for something. He almost feels like he's about to get into some sort of trouble, like he did back when he was a student.

Trouble seemed to follow their class, even after the war. Maybe they craved it, not knowing how to just be normal high school kids after everything that happened.

The teacher's office wasn't very far. Katsuki knocked before sliding the door open, looking at most of the teachers there eating at their desk. Katsuki wonders if Izuku eats his lunch with his coworkers or not but wouldn't even ask. He finds Aizawa quickly, walking over. 

“Deku said you wanted to see me.” He states without a greeting.

Aizawa doesn't seem to care, just turning his chair to give him that same deadpan look he's carried throughout the years. He's holding paper in his hands, something that looks like a list.

“Bakugou, I didn't expect you to be here so early or in person.” Aizawa says as if noting something down in his mind. Katsuki keeps his frown, shaking his head.

He didn't really want to answer why he was here, even if it was purely innocent. Can’t a guy just bring his roommate his forgotten lunch?

“Deku left his lunch at home like a dumbass. I just came by on my way to work to drop it off.” He huffs, not bothering to hide the answer.

Aizawa hums, looking down at the list in his hands before setting it on his desk. 

“Class 2-A is holding a special winter training camp during the new year. It's not a mandatory thing; the students can choose if they'd like to come or not. This trip is up in the mountains. Kamikochi to be exact. We want to take the time to let the students train in different climates and terrain.” Aizawa says, leaning back in his chair.

“Midoriya and Nezu came up with it. They've asked a couple of heroes to come along whose quirks are affected by colder weather. Midoriya insisted we put your name on the list of who to ask.” 

Izuku wanted him there. Katsuki nods, listening to Aizawa as he explains further details, but none of it is fully registering. A training camp in the mountains, far from home.

He suddenly feels hot, sees flames of a blue fire and the feeling of a disgusting mist clinging to his body. 

And Izuku's panicked screams.

“I understand if you're too busy to help out or if this is something you don't want to do.” Aizawa says as if reading Katsuki’s mind. “Think about it and give me a call. UA is taking the safety of those students very carefully. We’ve learned our lessons.” 

“Right. I’ll think about it.” Katsuki rasps before making his move to leave. He needs some air. 

*｡❅*⋆⍋✧ ✦ ✧⍋⋆*❅｡*

“A training camp in Kamikochi? Sounds fun!” Kirishima grins as they walk to their little food stall at the end of a long tiring patrol.

Now it's time for another meeting, a small break for Katsuki then another shift before he can go home and get some actual sleep.

With the way his thoughts are right now, Katsuki is certain even that won't come to him. He side eyes Kirishima, who's still wearing his Red Riot uniform, winter addition.

The air is dry and cold, too cold for Katsuki’s liking, but he knows it's only going to grow worse as December continues on. 

“Fun? Of course, you’d think it would be fun to deal with a bunch of brats in a snowy mountain.” Katsuki shakes his head, approaching the food stand with his classic sneer. They order their food, moving to sit at one of the few tables outside the stand. 

They bring the steaming food out, and Kirishima stuffs his face with noodles while answering. “Well, you don't like kids, but they're Midoriya's students! Plus, you and I go hiking all the time, you're perfect for the job, bro”

“Yeah, but that means I won't get the holiday shifts. The holiday bonus. ” Katsuki sighs, rubbing his gloved hands over his face before picking his chopsticks up to start eating.

If he doesn't now, he won't get a chance until around four am after work. Fighting on an empty stomach is the worst thing a hero could do.

Kirishima leans back, sipping some water as he watches Katsuki. It's a common thing he's learned, Kirishima’s way of analyzing how he thinks about a situation. “Do you know who else has been asked?”

“Some international hero from Canada, though they haven't got an answer yet. So, it’d be me and Izuku, maybe Aizawa.

“Like the good old days huh?” Kirishima muses before his grin turns down, remembering their first-year training camp. Even years after, that one school year looms in the back of everyone's mind.

Katsuki thought he'd be more thankful for the peace the end of the war would bring. He thought being less of a target would feel better. It just made things a thousand times worse.

More often than not, he felt like he was going insane being on edge, waiting for the other shoe to drop. His hand moves to where he was shot through. 

He hadn't been that scared of death the day he died. Now it's the biggest possibility in his mind. Even when walking through the streets, interacting with annoying fans, going home to find Izuku in a mess of graded papers. 

“I get it, if you don't want to go.” Kirishima finally speaks again, more of a sheepish look on his scarred face. “Don't force yourself to do more than you already are. Midoriya is just happy you're alive man. Don't forget that. We all are.” 

Running a hand through his hair, Katsuki shakes his head before peeling his mask off to make it easier to eat. “No, no I won't stop until he's where he belongs. How am I supposed to beat him if he isn't even in the race? Why would I help him be a teacher to a bunch of snot nosed brats?”

Kirishima pauses, unsure how to answer that fully. 

Katsuki's phone buzzes in his pocket. He takes it out, answering the call and putting it on speaker. Kirishima and him have been working with an agent and a lawyer to set up parts of their agency. Right now, it's a meeting about the building they've had their eye on for days. 

Soon Katsuki won't be needing to pull extra shifts. Soon he'd get his rival back in the world he belongs in, even if being a teacher suits the nerd more than Katsuki would like to admit.

Kirishima taps the mute button, trying to get Katsuki to look him in the eyes. “If he goes for those three to four days, who are you going to meet with during the nightmares?”

Stupid shit for brains bringing that bullshit up. Katsuki holds back the anger bubbling in his throat, counting down as he remembers the drunken rambles he made with the self-proclaimed Baku squad that somehow passed through high school still the same.

It wasn't even a habit he wanted, something that just happened due to living in the same apartment as Izuku. Each night, he'd wake up at four or five and just sit on the couch side by side to get an hour of pure dead sleep.

It was much better than being alone, feeling sixteen again. 

“So, for the agency ground zero…” The businessman speaks on the phone in a monotone draw as Katsuki comes to a realization that pisses him off even more.

He needs to go, or who else will tell Izuku what year it is? Who's going to tell Katsuki he's alive? How will they sleep that last hour if not near each other?

Katsuki wants to bash his head into the table they're eating at. Another long meeting on a cold long night and the familiar dread of a job he doesn't particularly want to do. 

*｡❅*⋆⍋✧ ✦ ✧⍋⋆*❅｡*

Katsuki shoves the house key into the door at three-forty in the morning, cursing to himself as his gauntlets bang around, causing noise to echo throughout the hall. Getting inside he does his best not to slam the door on instinct. 

Slipping the gauntlets off and his work boots, he notices a small bit of light from the couch, Izuku's work light that he uses to grade papers while sitting on the couch.

Katsuki uses it for paperwork as well but will never admit to the ugly thing on the side table being useful. It was another pointless argument Izuku won, another loss on Katsuki's mental score board.

Of course, the man is slumped over on the couch, three mugs of coffee on the coffee table and a mess of papers, muttering up a storm to himself. If Izuku taught like a normal person, he'd be done by nine. If he taught like an expert teacher, he'd be done at twelve.

But no, Izuku taught in his own hyper focused way, making sure each of his students got an equal amount of unnecessary attention. Katsuki almost felt bad for the brats, knowing how detailed Izuku's eye is. They wouldn't get past a single cheat or half assed answer. 

His head turns as Katsuki walks through to the kitchen, in need of something to drink and to warm himself up. 

“Oh Kacchan, you're home!” Izuku smiles, getting up, jogging some papers down. “Let me make your tea. Go have a shower.” 

“Thanks,” Katsuki grunts, letting Izuku do what he wants. “Did you eat?” 

“Mhm, I ate some of our leftover curry from dinner. Do you want me to heat up what's left?

“Sure.”

Katsuki isn't hungry, but he knows Izuku probably only ate one bite of the leftovers before getting lost in working and forgetting about it. The smell will make him want to eat, which is what Katsuki wants. 

He takes a quick shower, letting the hot water warm his body up. Getting out, he's met with food on the coffee table, Izuku sitting on the left side, watching a rerun of the news from this morning.

They sit, listening as they eat. Sometimes it feels like they've known each other too long. There's nothing to learn or talk about in quiet moments like this.

Well…most of the time.

Taking a couple bites of the curry, making sure Izuku does too, Katsuki finally says something to break the endless blabbing of the news anchors.

“I’ll go to the stupid training camp.” He says, huffing about it like it’s the worst thing in the world. Out of the corner of his eye, he can see Izuku barely hide his smile as he takes a few more bites of his own curry.

“Thank you Kacchan. It means a lot to me that you're going.” 

“Yeah well, don't thank me yet. I'm not a damn teacher, so I don't know what your brats are gonna learn from me.” 

Izuku pats his arm, making Katsuki look over at the tiny grin plastered on his freckled face.

“I've learned a lot from you, I'm sure they will too. My students are truly bright, I think you're gonna like them after spending some time with them.” 

Katsuki rolls his eyes and scoffs. “Yeah right. Eat your fucking leftovers and go to bed Deku.” 

Both men do finish the leftovers, though they don't make it to their own rooms. They knew it would happen, their routine staying the same.

Both men slumped over, their hands barely touching being the last thing Katsuki remembers. A few hours later, Katsuki feels a blanket thrown over him before Izuku leaves for work once more at seven.

*｡❅*⋆⍋✧ ✦ ✧⍋⋆*❅｡*

[whimsicalcrying]

˚ ♡｡ Currently reading: Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde

˚ ♡｡ Reading next: Babel by R.F Kuang

˚ ♡｡ Favorite read 2025: The Dragon Republic by R.F. Kuang

˚ ♡｡ Rates and little thoughts of past books:

Folk of Air Series by Holly Black-

The Cruel Prince (Folk of Air #1)- 4/5 stars.

The Wicked king (Folk of Air #2)- 5/5 stars.

The Queen of Nothing (Folk of Air #3)- 4/5 stars.

How The King of Elfhame Learned to Hate Stories- 5/5 stars.

The Stolen Heir (Book 1 in Duology)- 4/5 stars.

The Prisoners Throne (Book 2 in Duology)- 3/5 stars.

The Poppy Wars Series by R.F. Kuang-

The Poppy War- 5/5 stars.

The Dragon Republic- 5/5 stars.

The Burning God- 4/5 stars.

Non Series-

A Long Time Dead by Samara Breger- 5/5 stars.

Death, the Gardener by Daniel T. Dodaro- 4/5 stars.

The Song Achillies by Madeline Miller- 5/5 stars.

Season of Love by Helena Greer- 2/5 stars.

The Priory of The Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon- 4/5 stars.

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid- 4/5 stars.

Tin man by Sarah Winman- 3/5 stars.

Classics-

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen- 5/5 stars.

Carmilla by Joseph Sheridan Le Fanu- 4/5 stars.

The Great Gatsby by Zelda Fitzgerald- 4/5 stars.

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[whimsicalcrying]

Basic Info - 20\Cancer\Infp\she-her call me Jean

Fandoms I'll write for-

˚ ♡｡ Marauders (Fuck JKR)

˚ ♡｡ JJK

˚ ♡｡ BNHA

˚ ♡｡ Marvel

˚ ♡｡(maybe DC) and possibly many more to come!

Important things to note-

I won't tolerate any sort of hate towards trans folks in this space or any sort of hate that could affect a person. Be nice please.

This also is a hobby for me. I'm trying to become a better writer, so any constructive feedback is well appreciated!

Nav | M.list | A03

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⇢ ♡⋆。°✩ about me

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I am open to do request if that is something someone wants

[whimsicalcrying]

Flowers over Stars

Pairing: Narcissa Black x Alice Longbottom

Summary: Four moments in Narcissa Black’s life. Two in Narcissa Malfoy’s.

w/c: 7.9k

a/n: This has been on my Ao3 but I thought It would go nicely on here as well. I love me some sad lesbians.

Any feedback is welcomed! Enjoy!!

Ao3 | M.List

!Warnings!: Angst, Pregnancy, doomed yuri.

..─•❀•─..

 Narcissa was a flower among stars. A white sheep trying to survive in the chaos of those with darker, fuller wool.

Being the youngest daughter of Durella and Cygnus Black III, Narcissa, like her siblings and cousins, was born with high expectations. The minute the healer had placed her in her mother's arms that dreary winter day she was born, she had already broken far too many, much to her parents' disappointment.

“Another girl?” Cygnus drawled out the moment he stepped foot into the room she was born in, just like her two sisters before her. A tall pale man with dark hair and even darker eyes, strides inside towards her mother, who still lays in her birthing bed.

Durella held her newborn tightly, trying to hide her anger and disappointment at herself for failing her husband a third time. 

“Yes, but look at her.” Durella tells him, watching carefully as he begrudgingly comes over to see his new daughter. His eyes widen a bit when Durella moves the blanket to show off the child. The clearly very blonde child.

Cygnus looks between the baby and his wife, confusion written on his face. His hand comes up to scratch his beard as the truth settles between them without it being spoken.

“Who's her real father?” he asks, not sounding particularly mad nor pleased at the thoughts swirling in his head.  Just so dreadfully dull about the matter, like a business partner messing up some important documents. No, that would make him raise his voice.

Durella scoffs, forcefully setting the babe in his arms. “We both know she's yours. I never step a foot from this manor.” Durella responds, frowning at her husband's accusations. He lets out a scoff, shaking his head. 

“There's plenty of visitors that come in and out all the time. Don't treat me like a fool, Durella. I chose you as my wife because you knew your place in this world and yet you sit here and lie to me about your affair.” He rants, not even glancing at the baby girl in his arms until she lets out a tiny coo.

The silence in the room speaks far louder than what either of them could say. Durella leans back in the bed, staring up at the ceiling that has charmed stars to show the name of the child, a family tradition. 

The ceiling is blank and eerily dull.

“I truly thought she was yours.” She whispers, closing her eyes. 

“You should have thought about the possibilities before sleeping with another man. What will people think?” Cygnus hisses, setting the girl back into Druella's arms as if she had burned him. Druella lets out a dry laugh, barely holding her right. “You speak as if your whores don't waltz through this house every other night.” 

“My whores don't give me bastards, unlike my wife.” 

The humor falls from her face, her expression shifting into a glare.

“What will you do now? Now that I've given you a daughter that isn't yours.” she asks, not exactly knowing what to expect. Cygnus stands from the bedside, barely giving his wife a look as he walks to the door. 

“You can raise her as mine, but I will name her.” He says which makes Druella bristle in confusion. “Besides that hair of hers, her name shall be a reminder her mother had cursed her forever to not be a star in this world.” 

Cygnus glances behind his shoulder, glancing around the room as if he's looking for some form of inspiration. His dark eyes lock on the bouquet of Daffodils that sit perfectly on the windowsill of the only window in the whole room. “Narcissa, a perfect name for a child of yours, don't you think?” 

Druella grits her teeth, trying to hold her tongue at her husband's attack of words. “After the man who fell in love with his own reflection. Really?” She huffs but Cygnus laughs his wife's anger off, no remorse for her small little plight. 

“No, silly.” He mocks, giving her one of those wicked grins before opening the door to leave. “It's after the Daffodils I bought you. Remember? My gift to you for carrying our child?” He doesn't give her a chance to talk back, walking out the door and slamming it loud enough to make baby Narcissa cry.

Narcissa has always known she didn't belong in the sky. She's a flower among stars.

..─•❀•─..

  Alice felt ill.

Well, it was more nerves than anything, but the sickly feeling won't go away, even as she walks up and down the corridors of Hogwarts, trying to out walk the worries in her head. 

Usually, she'd run to clear her thoughts, but the clouds have darkened to an ugly shade of grey, signaling another rainstorm. So, she’s left with her thoughts of the upcoming game pounding in her head.

She had tried to get on the Quidditch team for the past two years since she was in her second year, but no slots were open for her to take. That is until this year as a lot of the team had finally graduated, giving her the chance to steal a chaser spot at this year's tryouts.

Quickly though, the joy of finally being on the team settled and the performance anxiety hit harder than getting hit by a train. Her first game was tomorrow, which will either make or break her new reputation as a diamond in the rough. 

Frank said he had never seen someone fly the way she does. A boy a year below her said she had the talent to make it on a real proper team. Though, that could have been James Potter just being James Potter. Nevertheless, she doesn't want to let her team down. Not when some of them fought their captain tooth and nail to allow her on.

The new captain of the team is Henry Balam, a seventh-year boy who has certain opinions on women playing any sort of sports and had not wanted to add any more girls to the team then there already was before he got the captain title.

“Mckinnon is enough” he yelled at her and those who were pushing him to let her on the team. Alice picks at the skin on her lips, angry at the way he claimed already having one girl was enough. 

She picks and picks until the side of her lip bleeds, making her groan and stop her pacing to sit near the large window that looks out over the field.

“Maybe I could run.” She says out loud to herself, putting her hand on the glass to feel if it's cold out yet or not. It shouldn't be summer isn't over yet despite all the rain. As the words settle, it's like the world gave her a response, by cracking a first bit of thunder accompanied by a few measly drizzles.

“Or not. Whatever you prefer, weather gods.” She whines out, pressing her cheek against the glass to sulk. “Whatever you wish….” 

Alice sits there for a while, watching the rain slowly pick up pace and the wind blow a few leaves around. The drops hitting the window and the side of the castle only serve as faint background noise for all the things she’ll mess up during the game.

Her mind slowly shifts to all the times her father and mother would let her practice riding her broom in the garden at the Fortescue home. 

Rain, snow, wind, sunshine, all she ever wanted to do was be outside and feel the world around her. To fly in the air like a bird, feel the wind beating on her face. Her parents gladly let her do it too, wanting her to follow any passions she has in this life of hers.

Alice’s main passion is living. She wants to see, hear, smell all the world has to offer. From muggle places to places deep rooted with so much magic you could feel it in the air.

 Sitting up, she looks at her own reflection in the window frowning back at her. She's only fourteen, she’s got time to do all the grand things in the world. Maybe I should focus on what I can do now, she ponders in her mind as the rain drops warp her reflection.

“Have I ever run in the rain?” She asks herself then chuckles, shaking her head. She waits for a few beats of silence before she speaks again. “Then maybe that's what I'll do.”

The temperatures have dropped by the time she makes her way out into the nearby fields. The rain beats heavy on her skin, soaking her from head to toe. Despite that, she still runs.

Her legs carry her as fast as they can with no set destination to reach. Fate will bring me to where I need to be, she muses to herself as her breathing picks up pace. The wind makes her wet clothes feel colder and colder. Yet she can’t bring herself to stop.

All she can think about is the rain and the cold air around. No more worries of the game ahead. No worries of sickness or growing ill from her own foolishness. Just rain and the mud splashing at her feet, dampening and muddying her shoes and tights, the hem of her robes.

Looking around, she can see the plants and trees getting all the water they need. Animals seek shelter, students seek shelter that have trapped themselves outside the castle. Some even watch her, confusion in their eyes as they try to stay dry under charms and jackets.

When she's past The Black Lake, she is tired and far colder than she thought she’d be. Allowing her legs to give out, she crashes into the soggy grass, her back hitting the mud as she looks to the clouds. The sound of a surprised yelp brings her from her own mind and soreness. 

Turning her head to the right, right under a large tree is a girl her age. Her hair is blonde, her skin pale, clothes splattered with mud. The sight makes Alice go sheepish, knowing she's likely responsible for the last part.

“I'm sorry I splashed you.” She says a tiny apologetic grin on her face. She hopes the girl knows she had meant no harm.

The girl's nose wrinkles, her head tilting to look down at Alice in disgust, but Alice sees more of the curiosity brimming in her blue eyes than anything. Alice studies her too for a moment, noting the green tie.

“A simple charm will fix it. Though, you should watch where you fall.” She answers, turning her head a bit to examine the way Alice lays shamelessly in the mud, letting rain hit her body, soaking her further.

“Do you not know any rain repelling spells or heating charms?” She asks, making Alice chuckle.

Running a hand to move the now wet strands of her hair, she grins more sheepishly. “I do; I just forgot about their existence. I was too excited to run.”

“To run? You chose to come in the rain?” 

“Mhm!”

“Are you mentally well?” The girl asks, then shakes her head. “No, of course you're not. Not even the standard Gryffindor idiot would choose to run in the rain.”  

Alice burst into giggles as the girl muttered to herself about the kind of people who choose to do dumb things, then going on a rant about how quickly one could get sick without using heating or drying charms to keep themselves well.

Alice kept lying in the mud, watching this strange girl with a smile. What an odd way to fuss over someone, Alice thinks.

“You sound like my mum. Plus, you’re out in the rain too, aren't you?” Alice finally interrupts the rambling.

The girl huffs, putting on that stone cold look as she brushes strands of her blonde hair behind her ears. Ears that have pretty emerald studs on the lobe. She must be rich, Alice noted.

“I didn’t choose to be in the rain. I was here doing homework before the downpour started without warning.” She explains.

Her blue eyes widen, glancing down at the state of her robes, just remembering the spraying of mud she received. Slipping out her wand, she mutters a cleaning spell, then a heating charm. Alice marvels at the ease she did it, not a fuss to be made. 

“You’re good at magic….um?” 

“Narcissa.” The girl informs.

Oh, Narcissa Black. Sirius’s cousin, Alice remembers, sitting up from the mud and shuddering at the cold wind and rain drops. “Narcissa is a pretty name, a pretty flower too. I'm Alice, it's nice to meet you.” 

Narcissa gives her a blank look, before making room under the tree.

“Well then, Alice, come here. There's no reason I can't share my shelter with you, though you have to clean yourself off.” She insisted, raising her hand towards Alice.

Alice nodded, crawling her way under the tree, letting Narcissa use her magic to clean her off and warm her.

“Thanks. It was a good run, you know. Did what I wanted it to do.” Alice tells her, leaning on the trunk of the tree. Narcissa only hummed, going back to her essay.

Alice could see the bewilderment on the girl's pale face but chose to enjoy the sounds of the rain instead. She’s made a new friend. A pretty friend.

..─•❀•─..

Narcissa didn’t need any friends, she had her family. She had her sisters, Andromeda and Bellatrix. As well as her cousins, Sirius and Regulus.

Well, scratch Andy and Siri from the list, as they've decided to outcast themselves from the family. 

Narcissa had her sister Bellatrix, and Cousin Regulus, two people she could not live without.

She didn't need anyone else. Only those two would ever truly know her, ever truly understand the interstices of their family and home. They were pure, they were special, exactly what she was not. They were the stars of the family.

She was thankful that her father ended up getting attached to her, his last and youngest daughter. Narcissa didn’t want to prove his gut right, that she was not fit to be a Black, that she was another man's daughter and blood.

Blood is a very important thing in their society. The thought that her real father could have been anything but pure sends a chill down her spine.

But she knew her mother, and she knew her mother wouldn’t touch a muggle or a mud blood with a ten-foot pole. A half-blood though? Narcissa was unsure of who her real father could be.

She had no desire to know him or to see him. She just wanted to know if her blood matched the world she was born into.

These thoughts that plague her when no one is around, the things she can't tell her family. It is a weakness to doubt yourself so much. Weakness to even think that you are less than what you are. So, Narcissa had found herself revealing these things to the next best thing that wasn’t her family. 

 Alice Fortescue.

A girl Narcissa shouldn't even speak to, a Gryffindor who is almost more outlandish and weirder than the very house full of weirdos and brutes. Alice Fortescue had kept seeking her out after their strange meeting in their fourth year.

For months the girl sought Narcissa out. Narcissa tried to deny her many times, warning her that she is in fact a Slytherin, and will not associate publicly with a student in red robes. But soon, Narcissa caved when Bellatrix graduated and when Regulus got his friends. Now they meet in secret, talking and laughing, spending time with each other as friends.

It was nice speaking to someone so different from her. A Reminder that there's a different world out there than the one her parents taught her.

A world Narcissa was forbidden to touch, one that took her dear sister and cousin. Both Sirius and Andromeda have been burned off their family tapestry. 

“You're lost again.” Alice called, looking up from her book on quidditch plays.

For the past two years she's known Alice, the girl could never stray too far from her favorite topic for too long. She's spent hours listening to Alice's long drawn reenactments of her favorite plays or rants about the other teams here at Hogwarts.

 Narcissa sighs, closing her own book about ancient magic ceremonies. She had been quickly called out again, retreating into herself once more. Alice often found ways to pull her back, like this moment when she reaches out to brush her fingertips on Narcissa’s arm, grounding her.

“Sorry...” Narcissa starts, setting the book down on the nearby table. “I haven't got much sleep. My mind has been running in circles since last night.”

Lucius Malfoy had asked her to Hogsmeade during dinner, giving her a daffodil. Her parents and the Malfoys have been talking sometime about a possible union match between the two. It seems Lucius was given the go ahead. 

“It’s about that date to Hogsmeade.”

Alice frowns, almost pouts at the mention of the date and Lucius. She, like many others, is not so fond of him, finding him rude, too proud and downright annoying.

Narcissa has always kept a level head about the boy, minding the faults but also the good she was graciously allowed to see. Alice keeps rubbing circles on Narcissa’s arm, then guiding her hand up to poke her cheek.

“Well, do you want to go?” Alice asks, turning her head to the side to examine Narcissa’s expression. She drops her hand to Narcissa’s pale dainty ones. “Malfoy is…...something, but he’s kind to you at least.”

Alice grimaces at the thought of that pampered princess who runs around the school like an arse. Narcissa hums in thought, closing her eyes and hooking her fingers with Alice’s.

It’s hard to meet Alice's frown, she doesn't know why the mention of boys makes her so on edge. They were friends, don't friends talk about boys? Narcissa wouldn't know. Perhaps it gave the girl some anxiety about the future and what it holds.

“He’s the Malfoy heir. I should want to.” Narcissa finally answers, which makes Alice deflate back into her own chair with a long-drawn-out groan. 

“You shouldn't have to do anything you don't want to! Do you want to go or not?” Alice reasked the question, tone more frustrated than ever, but Narcissa knows she's toning it down for her.

“No, I'd rather go with you.” She answers again, this time more truthfully.  “But I think I should go. He's a Malfoy after all.”  Her mother would urge her to say yes, to strengthen that connection for the family. 

 Knowing one day that She’d have no full choice on who her future spouse would be, Narcissa never let herself fancy someone.

The passing thought of the experiences she lacked quickly took over the concerns about saying yes to the date, shifting to what could even happen on the date.

“What if he tries to kiss me?” She wonders out loud. Narcissa has developed the habit of thinking out loud when near Alice. Alice never judged much, and always responded to the simplest of things, always curious and ready to deal with something new.

“Push him away or kiss him back.” Alice grins, answering as if either of those are the easiest thing in the world. Perhaps it is, if she had been kissed before, but Narcissa never strayed too far from her family.

It had to be written on her face, the way Alice instantly figured her out, grinning like a misbehaving cat, invading the little space in Narcissa's chair. “You've never been kissed huh?” Alice teases a bit.

“No, I have not.” Narcissa sniffs, turning her nose up. She will not let Alice see how much that fact bothers her. Bellatrix had already gotten herself many boys at her feet. Andy was married to a muggle born. Sirius had made it quite known he'd take anyone pretty enough to bed.

Regulus- well Regulus was Regulus. 

“Have you?” Narcissa falters. Is she truly the only one not experienced in anything? How mortifying the thought is.

Alice leans back, her lips pressing into a thin line in response to Narcissa’s question. Narcissa’s muscles tighten, a strange tug at her heart on how long it takes Alice to confess she had indeed been kissed before.

“It was after winning a game. Frank kissed me right on the field.” Alice admits, looking over at Narcissa who's staring at her with a tiny frown. 

“I’m sure it was only due to the high of winning the game.” Alice attempts to excuse the kiss, as if Narcissa had any right to feel so pressed about it. But Narcissa did feel pressed. She remembers the game Alice is referring to, and she remembers feeling odd at the sight of Frank Longbottom scooping her friend in his arms, taking her lips after a win.

“Why do you sound like you didn't like it?” Narcissa questions, turning her body fully to Alice, who wears a sheepish look on her face. “He’s your captain, no? Lots of girl's fancy Frank Longbottom.” 

“I don't want to talk about boys.” Alice interjects quickly, leaning more into Narcissa’s personal space. Her brown eyes wander down, taking in the sight of Narcissa. Narcissa takes in a breath of air, feeling the warmth of her friend's breath on her face. 

“Then what would you like to talk about?” Narcissa mutters, feeling her cheeks warm at the attention she’s now receiving. 

“The fact you've never been kissed not once in your sixteen years. The fact is a mere travesty.” Alice replied, her tone taking on a teasing and falsely astonished tone. Narcissa knows her cheeks bloom pink, making Alice chuckle further. “You’ve not kissed boys clearly, but what about girls?” 

Girls? Narcissa pauses at the thought. Girls……. Kissing girls? Narcissa had honestly put little thought into who she’d kiss, knowing that the person wouldn’t be someone her parents choose. Andy made that mistake, falling for someone not worthy.

“I suppose I didn’t think about girls being a possibility.” Narcissa says to Alice, watching the expressions in the girl shift.  “Have you…kissed a girl?”

Surely Alice couldn't deny this question. She doesn’t wish to talk about boys, so she'd have to answer right? The topic went from something she never thought about to something that she can’t get out of her head.

Alice looks away for a moment, quickly realizing that she’s dug herself into a hole she can’t get out of. “No. I haven’t had the pleasure of kissing a girl yet.”

 The pleasure? Does that mean she wants to? Narcissa looks away from her friend. The friend that she’s not supposed to have in the first place. She thinks about the girls in their year, ones that could be a fit for Alice. No one comes to mind, Narcissa can't even fathom the idea of Alice with someone. 

“Oh. And you’d want that experience?” Narcissa asks, trying to downplay how curious she is about Alice's wants. Narcissa doesn’t mind the girl's curious nature, it's actually one of the things she enjoys about her most.

Alice nods, leaning her body to Narcissa’s chair more. They both look at each other, clearly wondering the same things. “I want to experience all of what the world has to offer.” she whispers, clearly a little embarrassed. 

Narcissa smiles, turning back to pick her book up. Of course she wants the best of the world, Narcissa muses, opening the pages and letting her eyes scan the page. Alice is still watching her though, now the one lost in her own thoughts.

“Narcissa?”

“Yes?”

“Would you like to try as well? Here, right now.”

“Would I like to do what?” Narcissa presses, having a good feeling on what Alice was about to offer. It’s far more tempting than talking about a date with Malfoy or a kiss with Longbottom.

She briefly wonders if Andy or Bellatrix ever wanted to kiss their friends- their girlfriends. She isn’t opposed, definitely not at the look Alice's giving her.

 Alice looks up, looking far more vulnerable than she's ever had before. Alice is the kind of person who takes the world and makes it her own. She chooses to go out of her way to do things she's never done before, and maybe kissing a girl is one of those things.

“Would you like to get your first kiss over with? So, the nerves don't hold you down?” 

“Yes.” The answer falls from Narcissa’s lips without thought.

Alice barely reacts to the quick answer from Narcissa, not wasting time to get back into the girl's personal space. Narcissa’s eyes flutter closed when Alice gently pulls back the blonde strands of hair on her face before pressing soft lips onto hers. 

 It’s a rather stiff first kiss, but Narcissa's body relaxes into it, her mouth moving without much thought into how or what she's doing. The gentleness of it quickly becomes a small battle, both of them pulling each other closer, not ready to let go just yet.

Coming up from air, Narcissa pants, her face blazing hot as she looks at a flustered Alice who's grinning from ear to ear. 

She tastes like mint, Narcissa thinks, licking her lips to taste the mint Chapstick Alice had applied earlier when reading. Alice doesn’t stop her from going back for another taste. She laughs into the kiss, leaning over her chair into Narcissa’s. 

The second one only stops when the chair Alice’s knees were pressed into tips over, sending both girls to the floor.

..─•❀•─..

The start of seventh year brought many new situations and things into the girls' lives as they balance schoolwork, friendships and the looming war on their shoulders. And boys, which later on in life Narcissa knows she'd look back on and scoff on how serious she took the whole thing. 

As the year passed, only one thing stayed true. Alice and Narcissa would find comfort in each other's arms and comfort in sharing many firsts with each other.

The warmth in each kiss and touch they shared in secret only made Narcissa’s want burn more for her friend. Why kiss a boy when she had Alice? 

Why lose her virginity to a boy when she had sweet Alice who took things gently and slowly? Who savored every touch, every shudder and noise she took from Narcissa.

Alice took care of Narcissa in ways a boy never could, and she could only hope she offered the same pleasures to Alice. Narcissa is sure she did, cause Alice always came back for more.

Narcissa hadn't thought much of how same sex couples would be treated in the ever-changing Wizarding and Muggle world, but she knew her parents would hate it regardless of Alice being pure blood. Relationships in their world weren't for love or pleasure.

They were for family connections and heirs only. Being with Alice would give her neither of those.

So, publicly, she was dating Lucius Malfoy. He wasn’t terrible to her by any means, maybe a bit too far into his own worries and wants than to think much on hers, but Narcissa supposed that was only boy their age. Publicly she was a pure-blooded woman, about to graduate, set on upholding her family's ideals. 

But she was not pure behind closed doors, so why should her love life be too?

Alice was a good partner, a good friend, a good…girlfriend. Narcissa couldn't help but think of what a wonderful wife she'd be to someone. So caring, so out there, so happy to be alive.

Two women cannot marry, and Narcissa couldn't run away with her, no matter how much Alice loved to offer that as a solution after spending such times together. 

It was April fifteenth when Malfoy asked her family permission to marry her. It was April twentieth when he got down on one knee and asked under a tree near the Black Lake after a date to Hogsmeade. The very same tree she met Alice under.

It was only later that night when Alice tracked her down did any of it feel real.

Narcissa sat on a flight of random stairs, looking out at a full moon that's decorated with many stars around it. There wasn't a cloud in the sky to block them from shining.

Her pale hands gripped a letter from her mother, an angry one written in haste about Narcissa’s unsure answer to Lucius is a disgrace and how she should have agreed instantly.

She had asked for some time to answer, to which he happily gave. Druella had already celebrated one daughter marrying into a good family, the other daughter nonexistent in her mind, burned off the family tree.

Would she be the next? What would her father say if she walked into the manor, declared she loved a woman and didn't want to marry Malfoy and make him heirs? 

That would only prove that even with raising her as his own, she wasn't a true Black. 

“Ah, there you are! I’ve looked at all our spots, this one's new.” Alice speaks, looking up the steps to where Narcissa sat, sulking in her own miserable world.

Sitting next to her, Narcissa signs at the warmth she gives, relaxing into her shoulder when Alice pulls her into a side hug, pressing a soft kiss at her hair line.

“Alice….” Narcissa tries to speak but cannot find the right words to say. They've spoken rarely about what their future could hold, though they both knew after graduation, Narcissa would be marrying someone. A man. A pureblood man. 

Alice shakes her head, burying her nose into Narcissa’s black and blonde strands, hair she helped dye to make her feel more connected to her siblings and cousins with their pure black.

“I know.” She whispers. Of course she knew, everyone that saw the sight must have gone and gossiped.

“Were you going to tell me?” She asks lightly, patiently. Narcissa looks up, trying to keep the burning at her eyes from turning into tears and spilling over. They both knew this would happen.

 She just thought they had a little more time. 

“I was……I just…. I needed some time to think.” Narcissa answers as Alice’s eye connects to the letter in her tight-fisted grip.

Reaching out, she grabs the parchment before Narcissa could protest, reading it over. The angry expression only grew the more she read it.

“Look, I didn't want to burden you.” Narcissa speaks again, reaching out for the letter. Alice pulls it from her reach, before setting it down in her lap with a frown.

“Burden me with you trying to decide to marry Malfoy or not? That's what girlfriends are for.” She huffs then instantly feels bad for the tone she used on Narcissa. It wasn't her fault, neither of their faults.

“You couldn't come to me because you know I hate him. Not even for the cruel things he's done and will continue to do.”

She leans over, kissing Narcissa’s cheek then heading down to her jaw then neck. Each kiss sends a wave of warmth and anxiety down Narcissa’s spine.

“I hate him for being the one that gets to publicly hold your hand, the one who gets the chance to put a ring on your finger.” Alice tells her, raising Narcissa’s pale hands, bringing her knuckles to her lips now. 

Narcissa already knows this. She knows this is unfair to everyone in this situation. To her, to Alice and even to Lucius who has no idea the girl he thinks is his is spending time tasting a secret friend he knows nothing about. 

“What do you even see in him? Can he make you happy your entire life?” Alice asks.

“Lucius makes me feel like I belong in their world.” Narcissa admits in a pained whisper. Watching only Alice's lips as they go up her hand and forearm. She hopes nobody walks down the stairs or past the hall. She wants to keep the last bits of Alice's affection she can. 

“That it was worth all the rules I followed. That all the pain my siblings and cousins received was worth something. That my existence wasn't a mistake.” 

  Alice lifts her head, the spell breaking at the word mistake.

“You are not.” She says firmly, letting her fingers tangle with Narcissa’s, keeping her hand on her lap.

“He validates the horrid teachings your folks drilled into you. Narcissa, you could thrive anywhere you want. Come with me when we graduate. We can travel the world, hide away like muggles.”

“You of all people know that you won't run from a fight!” Narcissa snaps, then looks away back to the stars. “I've spent my entire life trying to be like my family. You tell me it’s wrong, and I've started to learn that may be true…but that's my family and they’ve finally started to see me as theirs. Not the question of my legitimacy.”

“Why do you always act like you’re not one of them? You do the same shit they do, though yes, lesser but it's still prejudice and vile!” 

“I am a flower born into a family of stars!” Narcissa snaps, finally looking directly at Alice who has not once taken her eyes off of her.

“I have been cursed since my name day to be different from them. How is that fair? I cannot afford to make mistakes; I cannot afford to take such drastic chances! You’ll have a family and friends to go back to if it doesn't work. I won't.”

“When will you stop letting them rule every part of you?” Alice raises her voice, not understanding how bad the hold Narcissa’s family has on her.

Alice wouldn't get it. She takes chances, she makes mistakes freely and gets to learn from them without much consequence. Alice in Narcissa’s mind is the embodiment of free living. Narcissa feels caged in her very existence.

“I don't understand, Cissa.” Alice chokes out, her emotions never one to stay down in tense situations like this one. “Don't you want me as much as I want you? Is this not worth trying?” 

“Of course I do! But I cannot take that risk.” Narcissa stands up, taking the parchment off Alice's lap, clinging to it so hard her nails almost go through it.

“You knew my situation before we started this- this thing! You knew it wouldn't last forever!” Narcissa cried out, tears falling from her blue eyes to her pale cheeks. “You knew…I'd end up marrying a man.” 

Alice rose up, rubbing her own tears into the sleeve of her robes. “So, you’re- you’re going to say yes?” Alice asks mournfully, already knowing the answer.

“I can't- Narcissa I can't do this if you're engaged to a man. I can't spend my life loving you in secret when you're out there happy with him.”

“Then save yourself, my love.” Narcissa whispers, her shoulders shaking as she holds back her sobs. “Go live. Stop letting this…teenage fling tie you down. Go date Longbottom or find another girl to kiss. Do whatever you must to forget me” 

This is much more than two girls who liked to kiss. They both knew that. Still the words Narcissa spoke seemed to stab right through Alice. She stopped fighting, going silent before stepping closer to Narcissa, pressing her lips into hers.

This kiss is the most painful thing Narcissa had felt. It wasn't fun and daring like their first ones, it wasn’t happy and loving like their others nor needy or desperate. It was, in the simplest terms she could use, a goodbye. Alice moves to pull away, but Narcissa grabs her cheeks, pulling her deeper into the kiss. 

Panting when they finally part, Alice rests her forehead on Narcissa’s. 

“I like flowers more than stars.” She speaks. “They are much more real and grounded than someone who shines in the sky, only to then crash and burn. You’re different from them, and I find that to be such a lovely thing.” 

Pulling away, Narcissa instantly misses the warmth and smell of Alice. 

“I love you, Narcissa Black. I'm sorry you can't tell me that too.” 

That was the last thing Alice Fortescue said to her in their seventh year. That was the last private meeting they ever had.

Narcissa knew she deserved nothing from the girl's heart she just broke but was thankful for the haunting words she parted with. 

Alice was right, she couldn't say those words back, so she just watched Alice walk away before turning her gaze back to the sky. A sky she’d never reach. 

..─•❀•─..

A few years had passed since graduation. The war raged, and families were quickly being made in the anxiety of never getting the chance to do so.

Narcissa, who was now a Malfoy and pregnant with one, was no stranger to this concept. 

She had often thought about Alice, sometimes even listening out for any bit of information being passed around the manor about the order.

Narcissa didn't take part in Death Eater things, her husband and her sister not wanting her to be any closer than she already was to it. The addition to her son in her belly also made them far more protective. More prone to keeping an eye on her.

Alice wasn’t too far behind her in the family department though. From what Narcissa had been able to hear, she had listened to Narcissa and ended up marrying Frank Longbottom.

Alice had sent her a letter before her very own wedding day to tell her this, despite the fact at that point they hadn't spoken in years or seen each other. 

On opposite sides of the war, married and starting their own families, nothing should be tying them together anymore. But Narcissa couldn't help but to look out for the familiar sight of Alice's dark brown hair when she managed to get out of Malfoy manor.

That's why she instantly spotted Alice this fateful day, stopping in her tracks on the street of Diagon alley when she saw Alice Walk into a shop, her stomach as round as hers. 

She's pregnant, almost as pregnant as me.The thought made her bittersweet as she rubbed her own stomach, rushing across the way to slide in the store. I

f Lucius asked her why she ran off, she'd blame it on hormones. Plus, she only wanted one glance at the woman she hasn't spoken to in years. The woman who she sometimes reaches for in her sleep.

Narcissa rushes into the shop, the bell ringing roughly, echoing throughout amidst the chatter of customers. Sighing, she looks around, frowning with Alice not in sight. 

“Cissa?” Alice’s voice rang in her ears, making her jump and spin around. The only thing that's changed about Alice was her pregnant body, everything else the exact same. It’s all Alice, her Alice. 

“You’re pregnant.” Narcissa says stiffly, the only thing coming to mind. You’re beautiful, motherhood suits you, she wants to say instead but there's no right way for her to say those words. Not right now, not in this era.

“Yeah, so are you.” Alice responds, drinking in the sight of Narcissa. That familiar flutter of being admired hits her, making her look down at her swollen stomach. Even a look makes her yearn for when times were simpler.

Alice looks at the small bag of candy in her hands before back up to Narcissa. “How far along? Perhaps our children could be friends.” That would take a miracle, they both know it. Still, the thought warms Narcissa. 

“My Draco will be arriving by June I hope.”

“Ah, my Neville will be here in July.” 

There's a bit of silence after that, both of them staring at each other and going over the thought that they're both having boys around the same time. In another world, maybe they'd be brothers.

Narcissa doesn't let her thoughts linger on that too long, her eyes going to the candy in Alice's hand. “You're still eating that sugary mess?” She can't help but muse.

It brings a grin to Alice's lips, a look she hadn't seen in so long. “I'm pregnant mate, I'll eat what I want.” Alice retorts which make them both grin at each other.

Alice comes forward, smelling of that same old vanilla perfume. Narcissa fights the urge to reach out and hide her face in Alice's neck. Alice grabs her hand and puts a single candy in her palm, one she’d eat often in their Hogwarts days.

“Don't let that ass you married deny you the world of sweets. You're pregnant, Narcissa, enjoy its perks” she tells her before walking out of the shop with a wink.

Narcissa opens the candy, popping it into her mouth before leaving to find her sister who’s most likely looking everywhere for her. 

She pockets the wrapper, planning to keep it just for a little while.

Those were the last words Alice spoke to her, Narcissa would remember them always.

..─•❀•─..

1981 ripped everyone apart, shattering many lives before the war came to an abrupt stop. Even then, cleaning up the messes poured salt into the wounds of many.

Death of loved ones, the capturing of others, and many funerals to attend, many trials to look out for in the daily prophet. 

Regulus was dead, no one finding his body. Narcissa mourned at an empty grave, urging herself to hold no thoughts of hope that one day the baby of the family would return.

Bellatrix was thrown in Azkaban for her crimes and connection to the dark lord. Narcissa didn't cry, but the flurry of mixed feelings caused a stress she'd never felt before in her life. 

The only thing that was perfectly sound in the mess of the world was that her Draco stayed safe and warm in her arms. His pale blonde hair, icy blue eyes, all of it was a safe haven, something Narcissa could sit and stare at for hours to feel at peace. 

So, she did, as she grieved all that was lost silently.

Her husband managed to stay out of Azkaban, but he's still far away in the mourning of his purpose. She never understood how a love for such a man could surpass her and Draco, but she never questioned it. He's his own man, she tells herself.

He’ll soon see that family is more important.

 Sirius was also in Azkaban, though on more questionable terms than she wanted to admit. He had betrayed the Potters, which was very unlikely in her mind.

He may have changed from the boy she grew up with and danced with at family functions, but he wouldn't do that. He was sentenced with no trial, making her questions grow further.

She had no right to even think about asking anyone for a retrial. Her family, her husband and child are safe and free from repercussions. And through the years of 1981 to 1996, Bellatrix could have rotted in hell and Narcissa wouldn't even bat an eye. 

With Draco out the house, going through every young wizard's journey, she found she had more free time than ever, more time to think about the horrid things her sister had done.

At the line she crossed, just to remind Narcissa blood is thicker than water. 

In 1981, the Potters were not the only family to suffer at the hands of the dark lord and his death eaters. 

The Longbottom's were tortured until they mentally broke, forever trapped in their minds. Bellatrix had taken the two greatest things to Alice. She had taken Alice's drive and passion for life, and she had taken Alice's chance to be the mother Narcissa knew she'd be.

“I cursed you. The second I kissed you, the second you took my heart, I cursed you.” Narcissa whispers to an older, sicker Alice as she lays still in a bed at St. Mungos, rotting away like a lifeless corpse.

But she was breathing, barely eating and not living, but her heart still beat. In a way it was almost cruel they had not died. Narcissa wished the world gave them that mercy, but it didn't. 

Her own blood did this, took something so beautiful and wrecked it all in the name of ideals of a broken man. It felt wrong to grieve, but Narcissa couldn’t stop.

Narcissa comes once every year in secret since Draco started Hogwarts. Right now, he was safe at home, sleeping in his bed for the first night of holiday break.

The air was freezing outside, the snow coming in and not going away. She wonders if Alice's baby is somewhere warm, safe. 

“You're still here, but you haunt me.” She tells Alice, picking up her cold freezing hand. They used to always be warm when they touched Narcissa.

Bringing the hand to her lips, she closes her eyes and urges herself to keep her emotions in check. She could hardly care that Alice's husband was lying there in the other bed in the same room.

 She was mine before she was yours, she’d like to tell him, but she can't. Her own blood did this, ruined something so beautiful for no true purpose. She had no right to this pain.

The anger pulls at her gut, but she refuses to think of Bellatrix any further. As terrible as it seems, she does miss her sister.

 Placing Alice’s hand back on the bed softly, Narcissa takes an old candy wrapper from her pocket, glancing at the many candies on Alice's Bedside.

“Even now you have that horrid sweet tooth.” She muses, pocketing her wrapper. Before she can get another word out, the door slides open, revealing a young teen boy.

He’s got Alice in every part of him. Neville flinches at the sight of Narcissa Malfoy in his parents' hospital room.

He sheepishly glances from her to his mother. “Is there something you need?” He asks, stammering as he comes further inside, shutting the door. “They don't respond.” 

“No, no.” Narcissa answers, glancing back down at her former lover. “Just visiting an old friend. I’ll take my leave now.”

She starts to walk off. Neville remains confused, his grandmother surely never telling him that his parents were close to the Malfoys. He knew who Bellatrix was, and who did this to his parents. 

Even then, he calls out a panicked wait. Narcissa turns, her eyes widening.

“Here, for you.” Neville holds out a candy. “Thank you for visiting them, not many people do.” He gives a nervous, weak smile. “Happy Christmas, Mrs. Malfoy.”

There's a pregnant pause as Narcissa tries to gather the strength to reach her hand out and accept, not wanting to be mean to Alice's baby. He's the last thing Alice has, and oh Merlin how happy she'd be to see her baby was a sweet little thing. She feels a sting in her eyes but chokes it down.

“Oh…Thank you.” She whispers. Going any louder, her voice would crack, and the dam would flood. “Happy Christmas, Neville.” Narcissa says gently before leaving the room and rushing out of St. Mungos.

Neville will forever wonder why Draco's mother knew his name, even years later in his life after the second war. 

From that day on, Narcissa kept two candy wrappers tucked in her pockets. One of Alice’s past, and one of her future. Narcissa felt a little relief, knowing the good parts of her old lover live on, in their own tiny ways.

..─•❀•─..

M.List

[whimsicalcrying]

Key: Coming soon, series, one-shots, discontinued, ♡= fav

‎⋆ ˚｡⋆୨Maraduers୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

James Potter/Regulus Black:

Serpentine Beach- prologue. | ch.1 | ch.2 | ch.3 | ch.4 | ch.5 | ch.6 | ch.7 | ch.8 | ch.9

Narcissa Black/Alice Fortescue:

Flowers over Stars- ch.1 ♡

‎⋆ ˚｡⋆୨My Hero Academia୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

Bakugou Katsuki/Midoriya Izuku:

The Shades of You & Me- ch.1 | ch.2 | ch.3 ♡

Mrs. Deku- ch.1

Todoroki Shoto/Bakugou Katsuki:

Love Child- ch.1

‎⋆ ˚｡⋆୨JJK୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

Nanami Kento/Reader:

Blue Umbrella- ch.1 ch.2

‎⋆ ˚｡⋆୨Marvel୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

‎⋆ ˚｡⋆୨others coming soon୧⋆ ˚｡⋆

back to Nav.

[whimsicalcrying]

Serpentine Beach: Chapter 3

Pairing: James Potter x Regulus Black

Summary: Regulus buys a run-down shack on a pretty beach hoping to turn it into a five-star restaurant. Lucky for him, across the stretch of Serpentine Beach sits the looming Tigers Eye Resort, who's owners generously let him, and his team stay. At Tigers eye Regulus is faced with his past, present and future.

w/c: 5k

a/n: This was my poor attempt at something a little steamy towards the end lmao but as you can see, I do not write smut at all.

As always, feedback is always helpful and appreciated!

Ao3 M.List ch.2 ch.4

!Warnings!: A bit steamy, drinking, weed, mentions of horny.

Chapter III.

𓇼 ⋆｡˚ 𓆝⋆｡˚ 𓇼

It was hot. 

The kind of hot that makes you sweat before you've even taken a step out of the safe haven that fans and aircons provide. The kind of hot that has you trying to catch your breath in the humid air, only to be left sweatier and unsatisfied. 

Regulus unbuttons his shirt, fully giving into the hellscape the beach front has become. He walks through the outside paths, taking the shortcut to the kitchens that Lily had so graciously supplied him after his mild complaints about being so far from it during a small chat while she did the hotel laundry. 

It's a small walk between the two large buildings. One side is purely rooms for guests and information desks, lounging areas etc. The other building has a few rooms for sleeping, but more sought out for the dining, the game room, the ballroom and of course areas that lead to the outside pool, and shopping center.

The sheer number of things to do here nearly gives him a headache, but there's only one thing on his to do list. Get to the kitchen and try a new recipe he thought of while sitting on Evans balcony with the others. 

It was a rather weird night, all five of them squished to one balcony using a small telescope Barty brought as a joke to see if they could spot the bones of Starlight. They could- well Barty said he could but Regulus is convinced he was high out of his mind and seeing things. It was one of those moments that reminded him that this was the family he chose, all of them talking about the future that was so close.

Regulus makes it to what is essentially the middle of the resort, where the large pools are surrounded by the tall buildings on one side and the outlook of the beach on the other side. Here, Regulus is faced with a small dilemma. He could make the walk even shorter, cutting through the pool gates or he could go the longer way and walk around the pool gates. 

Another gust of hot salty wind makes the decision for him, and Regulus sets off to open the nearby pool gate, closing it quietly behind him in hopes none of the lifeguards see him.

He trudges past the kiddy pools and many of the pavilions before he makes it to the adult area. Pausing his steps on the hot ground deck, he stops at the sight of James, who's using a pool net, leaning over the edge and gently scooping the leaves from the water. 

Of course, the man isn't wearing a shirt, his defined abs and glistening tan skin numbing every thought in Regulus's mind. Where was he headed to? It doesn’t matter now. He snapped back to reality when James looked up, eyes widening at the sight of him watching.

Stop fucking staring, Regulus chastises himself, turning his head away for a moment until James calls out.

“Just Regulus!” James exclaims with a smile, using the wet pool net as a staff beside him. He stands up straight, nearly posing before leisurely making his way to where Regulus had melted into place. 

“Mr. Potter.” Regulus says back, trying to avoid looking at the man's chest with all his might. It barely works, and he wishes that he had brought his shades with him this time. But alas, when he feels around his front pockets, they're not there. 

James's wild grin softens, taking the moment to look at how stiff and awkward Regulus is when he's caught off guard. “Please, just call me James.” He says, not stopping his inspection, eyes behind the glasses dipping lower and lower. Regulus feels his face start to burn, stepping back, bringing his hand to brush the sweaty hair from his face.

“Then stop with your teasing.” Regulus manages to mutter back, barely keeping his pride intact at the direction of the conversation.

James nods, stepping closer. “It's a hot day. Are you here to finally relax in my domain, Regulus?” 

“No, I'm headed to the kitchens.” Regulus answers, glancing up to finally meet James's eyes. “Lily told me of the short cut, that's why I’m passing through.”

“Yeah, she's full of facts about Tigers Eye.” James says easily, shrugging his shoulders before glancing to the pool then back to Regulus. His eyes look Regulus from head to toe once again, making Regulus want to shudder away.

Or pounce, he really can't tell. 

“I hope you're not too upset about the first night here.” James says softly, which kills any sort of fluttery feeling in Regulus’s chest after being so blatantly checked out.

Right, the first night here, Regulus thinks, closing his eyes for a moment to contain the rage and anxiety. He had fallen in the pool and made a complete fool of himself in front of everyone. Then Sirius went and made it worse like always, announcing that he couldn't swim when in fact he could. 

“I'm used to Sirius causing a panic.” Regulus deadpans, unable to hide the shift in his emotions. “He always makes a scene, even about the mundane things. Needs to be the center of attention like a needy child who craves it.” 

The sheepish look on James's face tells Regulus everything he needs to know. Clearly James and Sirius are close, that much it certain without Regulus even having to see them interact. Plus, from the small bits of rambling Remus does when talking about his university days, he's heard well enough about the marauders to take any of them too seriously.

Of course, his brother would be causing trouble, and of course he'd befriend the most attractive man Regulus has ever seen. 

“He's not so bad.” James mumbles softly, stepping closer to Regulus. “Just dramatic in a loveable way.”

Regulus scoffs, rolling his eyes. James smiles again, seemingly amused by the reactions he can pull from Regulus. Regulus doesn't like how easy it is for James to do such a thing, but he can't really control himself it seems.

“I'm sure Remus has told you about the staff party. It's a tradition to get hammered before opening day.” James continues to prattle on while Regulus watches the sunlight filter through the man's curls, lost in the image of him. “It's going to be really fun, I hope I'll see you there.” 

There's a couple of beats of silence, only the seagulls and the water filter of the pool being heard before Regulus snaps out of his stupor. “Ah, right.” He mumbles before rubbing his jaw. “I was told about it, but I don't think I'll go considering Sirius likes to start things.”

“Remus will keep an eye on him.” James promises, reaching out to gently tug Regulus’s hand away from his face. “I want you there.”

Yes, Regulus’s heart says. Fuck no, his mind screams in return. Regulus looks down to James' hand that is still holding onto his arm. It's too hot to even be touched this little, yet it takes everything in Regulus to not tug him along to the nearest hotel room.

Swallowing, Regulus takes a step back, glancing behind him to make sure there's no ledge he can fall off of. “I'll think about it, James.” 

“That's all I need.” He murmurs, giving him a goofy grin before shaking out the leaves from the net, then putting it around his shoulders. Regulus avoids looking at his arms, and starts his way back to the kitchens, remembering his actual destination is near. 

When he opens the gate to leave, he looks behind him to find James already staring. Regulus raises his hand and waves before slipping from the gate. James waved back, smiling brighter than the sun beating down on their backs.

Regulus makes it into the building in record time yet sweat drips from his forehead onto his cheeks and his back is wet. Briskly, he walks into the kitchens expecting the normal sleek cleanliness that Remus liked to keep.

Instead, Regulus walks into a room full of people, instantly moving to take a step out but the swinging door announces his arrival, making all eyes turn to him.

Sirius is there, along with that blonde woman, and Evan and Dorcas. Remus looks almost like a cornered mouse, despite the fact that he looms over all of them, the tall bastard. 

“Apologies, I did not realize this was a hang out spot." Regulus deadpans, turning to walk away. He's too overheated to deal with his brother, a stranger and the teasing grins on Dorcas and Evans faces. Remus can save himself, it’s what he deserved for having such horrible taste.

"Wait wait!" The stranger speaks, reaching out to grab his wrist. She drops it when he shoots her a look, but turns around to listen, nonetheless. "We were just telling your friends about the annual staff party we have before the chaos starts." She smiles, glancing back to Dorcas before tucking a short strand of her hair behind her ears. 

Flirting, Regulus instantly clocks, slowly looking up to give Dorcas a deadpan look. Evan catches the exchange, coming over to loop an arm around his shoulders. Regulus nearly groans at the extra heat, shoving Evan off lightly. 

"Yes, I'm aware of the staff party." Regulus sighs, glancing to his brother who's watching the exchange with what can only be described as a childish pout. He leans near Remus, as if trying to convince his husband to be as salty.

Remus is too busy sharpening his knives to care. 

"It's gonna be great." Evan smiles, tapping his hands on his shorts. "I'll get to bartend with Remmy boy here."

"His name is Remus." Sirius corrects with a small growl. Regulus partially thinks his older brother behaves like an unneutered dog whining for attention. It seems some things do not change, even after years of not seeing a person. 

"Right, Remus. Whatever." Evan shrugs, completely unbothered. Remus just snorts, shaking his head with amusement as he finishes up his knife set. Glancing to Regulus, Remus nods his head over. 

“Have you decided to come, or will you be smoking in your room and trying to hide it from Lily?” Remus asks casually, already knowing how to rope Regulus into doing things. Evan and Dorcas both shoot Remus and nod.

Giving Remus a frown, Regulus shakes his head, walking past the intruders to get to a proper workstation. “It'll be a surprise.” Regulus answers before snatching the prep list off the walk-in freezer door. 

“That means no.” Dorcas whispers to the blonde woman, who just giggles and leans closer to her.

"What are we doing for food?" He takes the bait, already annoyed at that blooming friendship. 

"Drunk people food." Remus says.

Regulus thinks about it for a moment, glancing at the clock and then back to Dorcas and Evan who clearly want to be included in this. It has been a while since he put his team to work. Biting his lip, he starts to button his shirt back up before grabbing an apron, before giving Dorcas and Evan a sharp look. 

The look he wears when leading a team.

"Evan, I want three specials on the menu. Make sure to add something light." He speaks, walking past his brother as if he wasn't there. "Dorcas, you know what to do." 

Dorcas nods, grabbing an apron for herself, not forgetting to wink at the blonde before walking further into the kitchen to set out what they need. Remus hums in approval, before kissing Sirius’s cheek.

"Don't pout about it or I'll tell Lily you're trying to leave out our special guests from the fun." 

Sirius gapes. "You wouldn't dare!" 

Remus nods, giving Sirius a raised brow. "Oh yes, I would. You're still on thin ice from using Harry as a personal messenger boy."

"I'm his godfather, I can do what I want."

"Oh, really now?" Lily's voice slices through the married couple's banter. She walks in, adding another person inside the kitchen that is barely full of people actually working. 

Regulus likes Lily. She's full of information and straight to the point, not taking bullshit from anyone, including Sirius. His lips quirk at the edge just a bit as he sees the way Sirius instantly backs down, turning into a bumbling fool. 

Lily smiles though, hitting his arm lightly. "Don't worry Pads, you can play nice for a night, can’t you?" 

Sirius crosses his arms, shooting pointed looks to the Starlight Team, making sure Regulus catches his eye. "Seems like I don't have a bloody choice, do I?"

Lily nods happily. "You don't." 

She reaches out and intertwines her fingers with his, gently tugging him along over to where the blond stranger is. "Come, we have set up to do. You too Marlene, I want the pools in top shape." She says, hooking her arm with the strangers no, Marlene's arm. 

With one last nod to Regulus and Remus, she whisks the two away to go work like some sort of fairy godmother taking away Regulus’s problems. 

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Remus told him that the party would start at six, but the loud bass booming through the gated pools started at five-thirty. The sun was still out, beaming down on everyone's arms and necks, making their swaying bodies sweatier than they'd usually be. Evan and Barty were already with the others, Barty gladly taking up Evans time at the little open bar Lily had set up. 

There were even more lights strung around the tables, small lanterns placed beside the food. Remus and Regulus had made all the food a drunk person could want, wings, different three-layered dips, jalapeno poppers and shish kabobs of tender meat and veggies.

Regulus wouldn't know if they're a hit though, because he chose to sit on his balcony til eight, with a small blunt between his fingers, peacefully watching the smoke curl into the sky. There's no Lily to come drag him to the smoking area, and there's no Dorcas bitching at him about being a recluse. 

He's done his work for the day, now he simply just has to sit. Sit and wait. Wait for what? He doesn't know, all Regulus can think of is the swirling smoke in the sunset and the faint echoes of the bass he can hear from his room. 

Regulus barely could register the sound of the glass door sliding open. He blinks slowly when Pandora sits next to him, gently taking the blunt from his fingers and pressing it to her lips. 

“Knew you'd be out here hiding.” She says softly. Regulus doesn't say anything, just watching her take in a breath and release smoke.

“Not hiding.” he mumbles, reaching back for what's left. Pandora holds it over her head before snuffing it out and setting it in Regulus's little ashtray. It was supposed to be a clay plate Luna messily painted for him, with garish hot pinks and purples. Instead, it sits on the small table, a perfect place for the ash.

She gives him a gentle mothering look; one she uses on Luna when the toddler tosses one of her toys a little too hard. Regulus feels like a child suddenly. She's got me all figured out, he thinks, leaning over to press his head into her shoulder. “Maybe I am.” He admits, closing his eyes. “He wants to see me.”

“That's a good thing.” Pandora says, bringing her hand to pat his curls. “Don't let your past hold you back anymore. Don't let your mind trick you into thinking you're still that same lost kid.” 

“What if I am that kid? The one that fucks everything up, the one who waits too long.” 

“The only solution to waiting is to just do it, Regulus.” Pandora gently presses her cold hands to his face, lifting his head to touch her forehead with his. He'd never let anyone as close as he'd let Pandora. He loves the others, he truly does, but only Pandora has ever been the one to make him want to keep changing.

From the second she asked their head chef a long time ago if she could put beetles in the soup, Regulus knew he'd found someone other worldly. They graduated together, he was a groomsman at her wedding, and he was the first one Xenophilius called when Pandora went into labor.

“You should bring Luna here.” Regulus says suddenly, missing the small girl who rarely spoke. “There's a boy her age here, they'd have fun.”

Pandora smiles, letting Regulus pull away. “Seems like she's never far from your mind, uncle Reggie.” 

“I despise children.” He reminds her, looking back out to the ocean. Waves and bass are all he can hear, the reminder that James could possibly be waiting- looking for him. It makes his stomach tingle, his fuzzy mind homing in on one thing. “But what I despise more is falling into that same old pattern of regret.” He says, standing up, dusting himself off.

“Let's go get a drink. I'm sure Evan can make me something lethal.” 

Pandora gets up and follows along, slipping her arm in his as they walk to the elevator and down to the party at the pools. It doesn't take long to reach the gates, the sun fully down now with a faint line in the sky. The darkness makes the entire party lit up by the lights. 

There were tons of dancing bodies, staff that Regulus had never even seen before in the week that he's been here. Girls were grinding down on some guys who pulled them closer, chugging their drinks out of plastic cups. 

A couple of men were hitting on other men, and two women were off to the side making out like they weren't around more than forty people. The closer Regulus got, the more clearly, he could see that one of those women was Dorcas and the blonde who was a lifeguard along with James. 

“Of course she went for it.” Regulus leans down to snark in Pandora's ear. Pandora simply giggles, guiding him along to the mini bar where Evan has completely taken over, Remus nowhere to be seen.

He’s busy shaking a drink, while clearly talking shit to Barty who's now melted into one side of the bar with a glass of water in his hand. They both look up when Pandora lets go of Regulus to run over and kiss Barty's cheek. 

Barty groans at the pampering, while Evan looks up and raises a brow at Regulus. “You've finally decided to come from your cave. We've been waiting for you, mate.” He says lazily, pouring the drink into a glass and sliding it over to Regulus. 

Regulus doesn't know what it is, but it's fruity and pink so it must taste at least halfway decent knowing Evan. “Double shot?” He asks. Evan nods, folding his arms on the bar to lean over it.

“Like always.” He confirms, before nodding his head to the side. “We haven't been the only ones looking for you. I don't know what you did, but you've got that man foaming at the mouth, Regulus.” 

“What man?” Regulus deadpans before following Evans' gesture while sipping the fruity concoction. He nearly chokes when he catches a glimpse of James. The man is pouting, leaning on Sirius like the end of the world is near, with a beer loosely hung from his fingers. 

Sirius is whispering in his ear like a devil on James' shoulder, clearly trying to cheer the man up.

Has he really been waiting for me? Regulus takes a moment to chug some of his drink before looking away, hoping Sirius hasn't spotted him yet. 

“Don't pay him any mind.” Regulus sighs, setting the glass down before taking a hand through his hair and unbuttoning his shirt. 

Evan whistles, plucking a flower from the bar decor and sticking it into the pocket of Regulus’s shirt. “There, now you look like you're properly on vacation” He grins and gestures back to James and Sirius. “Best kind of pay back would be to fuck his best friend, no?”

“James isn't going to be pay back.” Regulus corrects, struggling to compose himself. Maybe he shouldn't have gotten so high, it's got him being far too open and honest. “He's going to be my toy of the summer whether Sirius likes it or not.” 

“Atta boy.” Barty mumbles from his half-asleep state while Pandora mothers him. She looks up to send Regulus an encouraging smile, and it's all it takes for him to be on his way.

He almost feels like a stalker with the way he walks around the entire pool, briefly speaking to people, trying to look like he's not looking for a way to make contact with James without Sirius seeing. He kept his eye on the man for a good hour, just socializing before they made eye contact across the pools.

James’s mouth drops open from where he's trapped with the other marauders, in mild surprise that Regulus actually came. That Regulus was staring him down while sipping a pretty drink, looking way too attractive for it to just be innocent eye contact. 

James starts to make his way over, so Regulus starts inching his way to him as well, hoping to meet in the middle. Weaving through bodies, James gets faster the more steps Regulus takes to his direction.

Regulus was so close and then-

“Oh, there you are Regulus!” Lily says happily, a little too loud for a sober person. She's made her way in front of him, a shorter dark-skinned woman with pretty flowers in her afro by her side. Well, more like on her side.

“This is my girlfriend Mary, Mary this is Regulus, co-owner of Starlight.” She says, but Regulus is too busy looking at James who seems frustrated at the block. He seems to be patiently waiting, sipping his beer with eager eyes. Looking down to Mary and Lily, Regulus clears his throat and nods, holding a handout to shake Mary's hand.

“I hear you've been needing a good design for your menu.” Mary speaks, after she drops his hand. “I've got a degree in graphic design; I wouldn't mind helping out such an inspiring chef.” 

“Inspiring?” Regulus echoes, truly paying attention now. Mary nods, giving Lily's waist a gentle squeeze before speaking again.

“Yeah, I know about you. All the awards and charities you've donated the proceeds to. One of them was mine, fashion for troubled youths.”

“Miss McDonald!” Regulus says in surprise, taking a moment to force his inebriated brain to catch up to what's right in front of him. “I didn't realize we'd meet. The world is quite small.”

Mary nods, sipping her drink. “It is indeed. I was excited to hear that you're finally opening your own restaurant. Your work is important. I hope you keep that connection you have with your customers, it's one of the most valuable things you have.”

Regulus nods, feeling his body swell with pride as Mary McDonald of all people compliments him. The woman was renowned for the many organizations she’s put through and built from the ground up to help people in need and causes that were more important than petty drama. He had spent months trying to find somewhere to donate some of the House of Black funds after he shut down one of his father's most shady wings in Birmingham. 

“That means a lot, thank you.” He says, giving her a rare small smile. Mary and Lily beams back to him, slipping into an easy conversation about their plans and what Mary's next big project was. Regulus almost forgets the eyes pricing on his back. Almost. 

Once they wander off to go be alone together, Regulus doesn't even get the chance to turn around before a hand gingerly graze his back. He looks up to find James staring down at him with a peaceful, unassuming look.

“You're a renowned chef and a major donator to charity. What's next, you take care of puppies in your free time?” James wonders with a soft tease. Regulus rolls his eyes, sipping the last of his own drink before setting it on one of the planters beside the pool gate. 

His hands come up James's chest slowly, light as a feather, testing how far he could really go. James nearly loses his breath, and it makes Regulus touch him a bit heavier.

“I'm not fond of dogs.” 

“Cats then?” 

Regulus makes a face at James, earning a bright laugh from the man. He dips his head down, nose brushing Regulus’s as his hands settle on his waist. “No pets then, I can handle that.” 

Regulus slides his arms to hang them around James's shoulders, leaning in just a bit. He smells the beer and hints of weed, unsure if that was him or James. It didn't matter either way to either of them. They were fucked up and a little majorly horny for each other. 

“Let me be frank with you, Mr. Potter.”

“James, please.” 

“James.” Regulus corrects himself, hiccupping a bit. “I find you painfully attractive, and very much have plans in the back of my mind to use you as my toy for the summer, regardless of what my bastard brother has to say. How do you feel about that?” 

Regulus already knows how James feels, as the man presses himself into him. The loose red shorts he's wearing does nothing to hide how excited those simple words made him. Him being so eager makes Regulus want him more. 

“I think I'd like that.” James mumbles into Regulus’s ear, hands slipping lower and lower until they cup his ass. Regulus fights the blush, telling himself that it's just the weed and drinks. He's not so weak as to let James have everything at all once. 

Regulus gives him a flirty smile, before turning from James's arms and walking to one of the pool gates. He turns back and motions for James to follow. James follows like a dog on a leash, nearly tripping over himself to keep up, rushing to put his hands back on Regulus.

They land in the sand somewhere, backs to the wall of some small shed near the water, hidden by plants and trees. James' lips attach to Regulus' neck, gently guiding his body closer to his own, pushing against each other. Regulus moves, making them both hiss in anticipation.

Regulus doesn't really remember what happens the second James hand makes its way into his trousers. His eyes slip closed and neither of them are able to speak, the pleasure mind numbingly good.

All he can remember is being bent over, James mumbling sweet and gentle words, praising every little thing about him. The kisses on the back of his neck, the shell of his ear. The sound of skin smacking together. 

Fuck having to work on anything right now. Fuck his stupid brother bringing back haunted memories. 

He’s on fucking vacation and loving it.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

He wakes up sore and sandy, gently swaying in a hammock. A large umbrella and trees shelter him from the morning sun. The seagulls are loud and uncaring of his hangover and sore legs, hawking and screaming at each other while they dive between ocean waves for food. 

Regulus groans, using the palms of his hands to rub his eyes as the hammock moves a little more forcefully, like someone's bumped into it. 

Moving his hands, he finds a pair of little chubby fingers clinging to the side, curls and big brown eyes peering over it.

“Daddy said you weren't dead, Reggie. But it looked like it.” Harry says very seriously, voice in a barely concealed whisper. “He said not to wake you up, that you had the sleeps.”

Blinking, he tries to register the fact Remus’s nephew is staring at him, telling him all about his so-called daddy. He keeps silent for a moment, just staring back at Harry while things slowly click into place.

Dark skin? Check.

Big untamed curls? Check.

Big brown eyes and glasses? Check.

Goofy smile? Check.

“What's your last name, Harry?” Regulus asks, hoping God has some pity on his poor gay soul. All he wanted to do was sleep with an attractive man, not become a bloody homewrecker.

“Potter!” Harry says, moving to pull at the hammock, making it sway a little more. 

“I fucked a married man.” Regulus mutters to himself, before realizing Harry is very much paying attention to him with curious eyes. Sitting up quickly, he tries not to vomit when the hammock moves with him as he attempts to get out.

Once he does, Harry happily hands him his shoes and shirt. “Here Reggie! Daddy says you're his new friend, so that means we are friends.” He explains happily, moving his glasses to fit back on his face when they slip.

Regulus feels his heart squeeze, guilt pooling to the bottom of his stomach. I'm a homewrecker , he tells himself as he pats Harry's head, the expression of horror still painted on his face. 

“We were friends first Harry.” He tells the boy who nods along, before sending him a small little pout.

“A mean friend who wants me to try yucky veggies.” 

“Very mean of me, I apologize.” Regulus mumbles, sliding his shirt back on before brushing out the sand from his hair. He needs a shower, a good hour long one to forget about all the shit he pulled last night. 

“Don’t tell your father where I'm headed, okay Harry?” 

“Okay! Wanna go play ball with me?” Harry asks, reaching out to grab Regulus anywhere. Regulus gives the boy a small sad smile. What if I've ruined his family? How could I? 

“Maybe later. I’m going to head off now, okay?” 

“Okay, bye bye Reggie!

Regulus swallows before nodding, turning quickly on his heel to get as far away as possible from Harry and the crime scene. He was sure he didn’t see a ring on James’s finger, but he could have taken it off when working. What have I done?

[whimsicalcrying]

Serpentine Beach: Chapter 2

Pairing: James Potter x Regulus Black

Summary: Regulus buys a run-down shack on a pretty beach hoping to turn it into a five-star restaurant. Lucky for him, across the stretch of Serpentine Beach sits the looming Tigers Eye Resort, who's owners generously let him, and his team stay. At Tigers eye Regulus is faced with his past, present and future.

w/c: 4.5k

a/n: This feels like a very set upy chapter, which I didn't intend for it to be, but oh well. I hope you enjoy! The next one will have some good moments (At least I think)

As always, feedback is always helpful and appreciated!

Ao3

M.List ch.1 ch.3

!Warnings!: mentions of drinking, weed, Semi Horny James, bugs.

Chapter II.

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The Starlight crew have tried their best to get Regulus to relax over the years. From university to odd jobs and questionable lawsuits (thanks Barty), they’ve been through a lot of things together. Going in on this restaurant with each other wasn’t a big gamble as some people would assume. Regulus trusts these people, not just as hard-working coworkers, but as hard-working friends. Hell, he could even say family.

Through all of his own crash outs and semi-permanent mental breaks, they’ve never seen him so…frozen. The Regulus they know is the type of man that crawls out of hell just to get things done. The man they see now isn’t. Regulus looked and felt devoid of any motivation to get through this one. He felt like that same kid who was watching the world burn around him; his father pouring the gas and his mother striking the match. But I’m not, he reminds himself as he jots down notes in a small plain black notebook. 

Throwing himself into work felt like the only natural thing he could do anymore. Weed wasn’t calming him down and Evan cut him off after his third Paloma. The only thing left was Starlight, the menu to be exact. So, he holed himself up in Remus’s kitchen, claiming a space in the back so he doesn’t get in the way of the morning prep. When he’s not experimenting and taking notes, he’s helping with whatever Remus throws his way. The chef seems to keep to himself just as much as Regulus does.

“I'm not using you to avoid everything.” Regulus says on the third day as he takes one of his sharp knives to peel his thousandth potato. Remus sits behind him, needing to take a break from standing and straining his leg too much. Apparently, he's got chronic pain in his hip and legs and a whole load of other problems he didn't wish to get into when he explained the cane that usually rests beside him. Regulus didn't question it and made sure not to hover.

Without looking up from his own potato, Remus hums, dropping it into the bowl of others. “Right.” He agrees, before glancing up with an amused glint. “So, you're not purposely ignoring your friend's wishes to hang out at the pool or by the water. And you don't triple check the halls before leaving the kitchen to make sure Sirius isn’t going down them.”

“Those are merely protective measures.” Regulus huffs, putting the knife down for a moment, running his hand over the apron he wears. The starch from the potatoes has made his hands uncomfortably dry. “You never know how that bastard will strike.”

“Yes, my husband is quite the planner.” Remus deadpans and grabs another potato from the sack. Gliding his knife easily beneath the skin, he grins to himself. “Nearly fell out of the bed this morning trying to reach the phone. A genius really.”

Regulus scowls and shakes his head with a disappointed sigh. “I can't believe you have such horrible taste. And here I was, almost starting to like you.” 

Remus actually laughs at the jab, grinning to himself, he sets his knife down as well to pick up his cane instead. Using that and the counter for an aid, he rises from his seat to come stand next to Regulus.

“Look, I couldn't believe it either.” He admits and looks down at the list of prep to do today. “I mean, uni was hell for me. For all of us really, but Sirius took it all in stride and made himself a better man because of it. So…no matter how stupid he may act, he's a good man who came from a bad place.” 

“You know it all then? Well, his side at least.” Regulus asks, going back to his work. 

“Only some. He doesn't talk about it too much.” Remus informs, moving to grab a marker to write some things down. There are a few moments of silence, just the sound of Regulus peeling potato skins and the sharpie Remus is using, gliding on the surface of the paper.

“He does miss you.” 

Regulus doesn't respond to that, keeping his steady peeling pace. Remus seems to get the message and stops talking about it. The two go about the kitchen work in the same rhythm they had on the first day, the heavy topic doing nothing to affect the training of a good routine.

The thought of Sirius missing him after the shitshow he caused when he left the family makes Regulus want to laugh. Not a good happy laugh, but the sort that comes out during the worst events to laugh at. Like a funeral.

Regulus could feel and hear it all as if it happened just the other day ago. Sometimes at night, he’d close his eyes and hear the voices of Sirius and their mother clashing. He hears the police sirens, tastes the iron from blood on his tongue, and sometimes he hears his big brother begging him to run away with him.

Sometimes.

It makes Regulus understand that no matter how much work he does on himself, no matter how many good deeds he tries to do, he can't wipe the slate of his family name away. Sirius will look at him and always see the little brother who rejected him, not the man looking for some sort of peace. 

And yes, he was quite bitter about having to deal with Orion's death all on his own. Regulus quickly grew tired of having to act like the eldest son after Sirius left. He hadn’t known just how much his older brother was shielding him from. Dinners became unbearable, the mild chatter of Orion talking about the most recent sucker who signed a contract with him, along with Walburga’s fake interest in the subject.

It took three years for Regulus to follow in Sirius’s footsteps. To leave that rotten house. The first six months were spent trying to find a place to live and find his older brother. He had lived in a stuffy flat with the family's ex-chef Kretcher. There, he learned the wonders of cooking. 

Not just high-class portions and overpriced soups. No, Kretcher guided him through how to cook when living off of scraps. He never went to bed hungry, unlike at his parents' house where his mother refused their children more appropriate portions. Regulus thought it was funny that he ate better at his poorest rather than when he had the House of Black funds.

It's to keep your figure, she would say while condescendingly looking at their staff that were trying to mind their own business. His mother is a wicked old bitch. A woman who could smile in your face while poisoning your cup of wine. 

“Oh, I forgot. Minnie told me to warn you about the summer rush.” Remus speaks up, pulling Regulus out from his thoughts. He blinks for a moment, trying to come back to Earth before nodding, reaching up to grab a pan. 

“I'm assuming it gets busy when the season fully starts.” Regulus responds, oiling up the pan and turning on the heat with three satisfying clicks.

Remus lets out a humorless laugh, shaking his head as he fills a large pot with most of the potatoes they peeled for the day. “Think of brunch on a Sunday after church, but ten times more packed and never ending.” 

Regulus wrinkles his nose at the thought which makes Remus really laugh. “It sounds dreadful. When does Tiger's Eye open its doors?” 

“June seventh, I think.” Remus answers, now wiping his hands off on a kitchen towel. He comes over to stand next to Regulus, glancing at the temp Regulus set the stove at as if to double check. “Anyways, before the opening the staff likes to have a big party to boost morale. The woman who man's one of the gift shops, Marlene, says that working opening day with massive hangovers is tradition now.” 

“Is this an invitation, Lupin?” 

“Hey, act like staff, get treated like staff.” 

Regulus does not deny the statement, just shrugging with a small grin on his face as he pours onions into the pan. Before the two chefs could talk any further of the upcoming work that must be done, one part of the kitchen double doors opens to reveal Harry poking his head in with a big goofy smile.

Seeing it's only Regulus and Remus, he makes his way in, little legs working overtime to rush over. “Uncle Moony, can I have a- a…ni..nicoise salad?” 

“Salad?” Remus echos, turning to look down at Harry who sees nothing strange with his request. Raising a brow, Remus pats Harry’s head. “You want a salad? I thought you only ate cheese and chicken.” 

“I do!” Harry agrees before pausing and furrowing his brows in thought, clearly trying to come up with an excuse to get this salad. Regulus watches the exchange with mild amusement, before grabbing a piece of lettuce and putting it in Harry's face. Harry gasps and stammers back like he's been presented with the boogeyman.

“I don't know bug, it seems like you wouldn't come near a salad.” Remus drags out, putting his hands on his hips. “Who gave you this mission?”

“Shh uncle moony! It's supposed to be a secret spy mission.” Harry says loudly, raising his hands to try to reach Remus’s mouth. Given the fact the man is nearly six feet tall, there's not a chance Harry’s baby arms make it.

“Mission? And who put you on this mission?” Regulus asks dryly, turning back to make sure the onions don't burn. 

“Uncle padfoot.”

“What kind of name is Padfoot?” Regulus deadpans, shaking his head to himself as Remus rolls his eyes. Remus doesn't look amused anymore, quickly reaching into his pocket to pull out a notepad and write something down. He takes a sheet off with a loud rip, folding it neatly and handing it off to harry.

“I have a different mission for you.” Remus says, giving Harry a smile. “Go give this to Padfoot and tell him if he doesn't come down here himself, I will get your mother.”

Harry looks at Remus with comically wide eyes before nodding his head off as he races out of the kitchen to go deliver the message. Regulus shakes his head, muttering something about kids while Remus gets back to work.

“Padfoot and Moony huh?” Regulus questions.

Remus sighs, rolling his sleeves up. “You don't want to know, trust me.” 

Not even five minutes later, Harry pops back into the kitchen with a happy smile, gently tapping his hands on the island to alert them he was there. “I'm back!” He announces loudly which earns him the attention of the room. Regulus tries very hard not to be fond of the kid, but there's so much charm in the way he acts. Despite his horrible palate, Regulus can tell the kid was raised by a loving family. He could turn out a normal adult, he thinks to himself as he watches Remus barge out of the kitchen. 

“Ouch! Moony, be gentle baby.” the familiar whining voice of Sirius comes through before the doors push open again. Remus has Sirius by the ear, dragging him inside before letting go with an unamused look.

“How many times do I have to tell you? If you want to request food, come down here like an adult and ask for it. Harry isn’t your messenger boy.” He rants; scarred arms crossed over his chest. 

Regulus stands stiffly by his pan, hoping to God that Sirius chooses to ignore his existence like he's been trying to do. Harry comes to stand next to him to watch the show with the same little grin on his face. “Uncle Moony gets onto Uncle Padfoot like mommy gets onto daddy” He whispers loudly.

Sirius looks up, betrayed by his godson. “Harry! Don't converse with the enemy.” He calls out, only to earn a sharp look from Remus. “What? He could be putting bad ideas in the kid's head.” he tries to defend himself.

Regulus scoffs, unable to stop himself from responding to his brother's jabs. “Like what? Eat a vegetable? I'm sure he's gotten your horrid eating habits. A salad once a month does nothing for you.” 

“You little-” Sirius cuts himself off from cursing but shakes his hands like he's strangling the air. “You know nothing of my eating habits. Moony keeps me well fed!” 

“Oh, I'm sure he does.” Regulus agrees. “Didn't have a good mommy to start with so you went and found yourself a new caretaker huh? Must be nice getting to pick and choose the struggles you want to deal with.” 

“Oh, like you have room to talk.”

“I don't.” Regulus shrugs before turning back to cooking. Harry looks between the two of them and then turns to watch Regulus cook, his tiny hand grabbing at Regulus’s pants. Blinking in surprise, he looks down to see Harry's focused gaze before choosing not to comment on it.

Sirius whines. “Look! He's stealing Harry away from us.” He tells Remus. Remus himself is rubbing the spot between his eyes, trying to fight off a migraine. “I told you he was a scheming little snake. He's plotting to take over the entire resort!” 

“He's opening a restaurant on the other part of the beach.” Remus corrects, before taking Sirius’s hands, kissing the tattoos on his pale knuckles. “Stop using Harry to hide from your problems.”

“Why must you hang around my problem?” Sirius asks in return which makes Regulus grin to himself at being labeled in that way. He's fighting a losing battle, much to Regulus’s amusement. 

“Your problem is a guest that is actually helping me around the kitchen.” Remus reminds Sirius. Sirius grumbles under his breath, moving to hide himself in Remus’s chest, kissing along the scarred man's jaw before pulling away to glare at Regulus.

“Don't you dare try anything with my man.” Sirius warns. 

Regulus doesn't even turn around to acknowledge the warning, just waving his older brother off. Sirius huffs and storms out of the kitchen, leaving them to work in peace. Remus shakes his head once more, before putting the pot over the stove and turning it on. “He‘ll get over it.” he assures like this isn't a rare occasion of fits. Harry nods and looks up at Regulus. 

“He’ll like you soon, fake uncle.” 

“My name is Regulus, not fake uncle.” 

Harry frowns. “It's too long.” He complains, before tugging further on Regulus’s pants leg.

“And fake uncle isn't?” Regulus questions with a small laugh, looking down at the young boy as he pouts about what to call Regulus. Sighing, Regulus gives in and turns his head away. “Call me Reggie then.” 

“Okay, Reggie!”  Harry smiles before looking back at the movements Regulus does with the pan.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

"I'm telling you James, ignore the soft angel like skin and you'll find a demon underneath." Sirius prattles on, coming back from the kitchens empty handed, his quest for food failed. 

James isn't surprised, given the fact his own son was used as the messenger owl, a thing Remus and Lily have been trying to get Sirius to stop doing. James doesn't mind though, biting the inside of his cheek as he soaks in every detail about Sirius’s baby brother.

Regulus Black, once a figure James could only imagine when Sirius would open up about his life before university. He was a complete mystery to everyone, only bits and pieces of information from Sirius’s scattered memories of his home life.

Round cheeks, a crybaby, a little smart ass, those are the words that Sirius used to describe the now grown version of that little boy Sirius knew. 

Shaking his head, he hums, keeping a steady pace on the task of folding Harry's clothes. Taking small swim shorts, he lays them out on the bed, taking the time to match the ends perfectly. "I don't know pads, maybe he's actually just living his life like you are." 

"You don't just leave the Blacks that easily." Sirius protests, shaking his head as if what James said was the stupidest thing on Earth. James shrugs, adding the swim shorts to the fresh pile of laundry. 

Pushing his glasses higher on his nose bridge, he turns to Sirius with his hands on his hips, giving his best friend a look. "You were able to leave; I don't see why Regulus couldn't have."

"I begged him to come with me James, and he refused to." 

James doesn't know how to respond to that. Instead of speaking, he bends over to grab a handful of Harry's shirts, shoving them to Sirius’s chest. 

"Look, I know you're experiencing a lot of things right now." James says carefully, keeping the shirts pressed to Sirius’s chest, waiting for Sirius to grab them himself. Once Sirius meets his eyes, he nods and let's go to resume his shorts folding.

Sirius falls in a slower pace of folding, biting the piercing on his bottom lip in concentration. 

"You lost your dad, and now you're seeing a brother you've thought you lost forever. Instead of seeing this as a bad sign, maybe take it the other way around. This is your chance to connect with Regulus again." James speaks calmly; in the tone he's now usually taking when speaking to Harry during fits.

It works for babies, drunks and emotionally devastated best friends.

"Just because he didn't leave with you doesn't mean he never grew up and changed his mind." 

Sirius is silent for a while, the only sound in the room is the shuffling of clothes and the kicking on of the aircon. James knows that Sirius is thinking. Of what exactly, he isn't sure of, but he's got that distant look in his eyes. The look of remembering the past. 

After the last shirt is folded, Sirius sighs. "Okay, maybe he isn't here to ruin my life." He concedes. "But that doesn't mean he's changed. He could still be in their...no, her demon claws." 

James nods along to Sirius’s words, setting the last pair of shorts on the pile and patting it happily. 

"How about this pads, what if I go speak to some of his coworkers? I'll get the scoop on Regulus and report back to you like a good little messenger boy." He offers with a big grin. “I am the next best thing after Harry.”

Internally he feels a little bit guilty for offering such a thing, knowing full well he wants to know more about this adult Regulus too. It’s not like he knew that Sirius’s brother was going to look so…so..pleasing to the eye. It's not fair that there is a man that looks that attractive being off limits.

He could see it now, the sun glistening off Regulus’s curls, the salty air making a mess on his head. James wants to watch him lounge at the pool, or lay on a beach towel. He wants that scathing, calculating look on him. Surely Regulus is short enough that James could easily pull him in one of the supply closets and-

No James. That's Sirius’s baby brother.

He can’t touch, but it doesn’t mean he can’t flirt and learn more about the head chef of Starlight.

"You'd do that for me, prongs?" Sirius pouts, a little teary eyed, bringing James back to the realm of not horny people. I'm going to hell, James thinks in passing as he nods, trying to act like this is a fully innocent mission just for his best friend.

"Of course, you're family." 

Sirius gives him a teary eyed smile, dramatic as usual but James loves that part of him. Raising from the bed, he gives James a rough pat on the arm, the tears quickly replaced with determination.

"You've got to find out everything you can, Potter. We need to learn what the bastard is up to." Sirius says. "He’s already got Moony in this trap, my own husband! Better be careful, don't be the next."

James nearly gulps at the warning, but laughs off the brush of anxiety at Sirius’s words. How does he tell his best friend that he was totally planning to hit on Regulus the second he saw him standing at the pool during Lily’s tour? 

I won't tell him a thing, James decides, before heading out to go seek one of the Starlight Crew to start asking totally innocent questions. 

As he leaves the hotel room, he ponders about which to speak to. Barty was nice, but in that sort of way like every word he says feels like an underhanded tease. He didn't hear much of their bartender, and Dorcas was already relaxing out by the pools.

"Can't disturb resting guests." He mumbles to himself as he walks down the halls all the way through the main entrance and out the sliding doors. The salty air hits his senses the second he steps past the wall.

James closes his eyes for a moment to enjoy the feeling he's missed, then makes his way down to the long stretch of beach, walking in a stranger's literal footsteps to the now bare bones of the once shabby building that accompanied Tiger's Eye on the stretch of beach.

The Starlight crew had wasted no time getting contractors out. Most of the outside of the hut were gone, stripped right down to the wooden beams and rotten wood.  James hadn't really expected to find anyone there, but as he passed the old fishing pier that laid between the two establishments, he caught a glimpse of platinum blonde hair.

Pandora is standing near a pile of lumber that rests in the sand. There's an entire long fold out table in front of her, with an array of different sorts of delicious looking cupcakes with cloud like frosting covering them all.

In her hands, she jots down notes in a little pink notebook lost in her own world. 

James gets a sudden hint of embarrassment. Why is he bothering this poor lady about her friend? What right does he have to go prying into that pretty man's life? Before he can walk away, she speaks up.

"Oh, hello there!" Pandora smiles, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear, the wind from the ocean making it nearly impossible for it to stay still. 

James offers a smile back, walking up to the table with his hands in his pockets. "Ello there. Sorry to bother you, I just wanted to uh...check it out." He explains almost awkwardly. James wonders where his usual charm went, begging it to come back before he makes a bigger fool of himself.

Pandora either didn't care or didn't notice, just happily nodding along to his lame excuse. She glances behind her to the bare bones of the restaurant. "Ah, yes. It looks like a wreck now, but things get worse before they get better."

James nods in agreement, a real smile creeping in. Regulus can't be an evil mastermind if he's got a woman like her at his side. "Yes. I'm actually really excited about the restaurant. The guests have been wanting something else to go to for food. It's going to be a whole new experience for long term guests to enjoy." 

"I'm happy our presence is welcomed." Pandora says wistfully, looking back to the array of sweets on the table. James takes a look as well, trying to not let his mouth water.

Remus would murder him if he found out he was tempted to eat sugary desserts before dinner. After Harry was born, everyone in the friend group had chosen to go on good diets to stay healthy for the boy.

But god does he want to try them badly. 

"Regulus isn't here, you know." Pandora says lightly, moving one of the cupcakes to the other side before crossing something out in her notebook. "He's been in the kitchens with Remus, refusing to take a break."

"Does he often not take breaks?" James asks.

Pandora looks up from her notebook, nearly white brows furrowing as she takes a hard look at James. The expression passed quickly- almost too quickly but James still had caught it before she went back to the pleasant look.

"He's a hard working man." She grins, setting the notebook on the table. "Single too.."

"Oh." James tries not to sound distressed. It's hard when that's the most interesting thing he's heard right now. No, stop it, he reprimands himself. I can't go back to Sirius just to say that Regulus is single and very very available. 

"So, what have you got here? These look amazing." James changes the subject abruptly, but yet again, Pandora doesn't seem to mind. In fact, she grins widely, gesturing to the array of sweets on the table with a proud flare.

"Experiments." She answers, picking a cupcake up. The frosting looks to be chocolate with an assortment of chocolate pieces and maybe brown sprinkles on top. Whatever it is, it makes James stomach growl loudly.

"Would you like to sample? I would love some feedback." 

"I'm dying too." James admits and takes the offered cupcake. At first, he tries to take a bite like a sane person, but his teenage instincts kick in and he nearly shoves the entire thing into his mouth.

As he chews, Pandora watches with interest, picking the notebook up with a glint of mischief in her eyes.

"How's the taste?"

"It's good! Something is a little crunchy though." 

Pandora nods, writing notes down innocently before speaking again. "Oh, the bugs tend to be. I'm trying to find a way to ease them into the recipes"

James stops mid chew, his face growing pale. "Bugs?"

"Yes, bugs. Regulus banned me from experimenting with them in the kitchen, but I'm trying to get one bug dish on the menu." She sighs as if the fact is weighing on her. “Everyone loves a good bug dish.”

James tries very hard not to spit the cupcake out, especially when she's looking at him so patiently to swallow so she can hear his thoughts. Closing his eyes for a moment, he forced himself to finish, barely containing the gag. "Maybe give people a warning ,you know?" He offers lightly.

When he opens his eyes, Pandora is watching him with an amused expression, nodding along to his suggestion. "I normally don't have to, Regulus warns others for me." 

"Regulus didn't do a good job this time." James retorts with a weak smile.

"Oh well." She shrugs, looking back down to the table. "Want to try the cricket version?"

"No thanks, I've had enough dessert before dinner." James excuses himself and bids Pandora a swift goodbye before running back to the Resort in search of mouthwash and water.

Maybe Regulus could be evil, James thinks to himself as he slips back into his room, heading straight for the bathroom. It doesn't make me want to run though, he notes, watching himself swish mouthwash back and forth in the reflection of the mirror.

Sirius is gonna kill him, but he may get over it.

[whimsicalcrying]

this blog hates donald trump

Look how many people hate him. I’m pretty damn happy about that 😁😁😁😁😁😁

[whimsicalcrying]

Serpentine Beach: Chapter I

Pairing: James Potter x Regulus Black

Summary: Regulus buys a run-down shack on a pretty beach hoping to turn it into a five-star restaurant. Lucky for him, across the stretch of Serpentine Beach sits the looming Tigers Eye Resort, who's owners generously let him, and his team stay. At Tigers eye Regulus is faced with his past, present and future.

w/c: 6.7k

a/n: This is chapter one of the thing that's been stuck in my freaking head for the past few months. It's my first time doing a muggle au, but I'm having a lot of fun doing it! I really hope you enjoy this chapter and stick around for more!

As always, feedback is always helpful and appreciated!

Ao3

M.List prologue ch.2

!Warnings!: mentions of drinking, weed and parental death.

Chapter I.

𓇼 ⋆｡˚ 𓆝⋆｡˚ 𓇼

“So, about this vacation.” 

“This isn't a vacation.” 

Regulus grumbles under his breath as he glances at Dorcas through the rearview mirror of the car. He's spent almost an hour in this car, driving to the airport and all the way back to pick Dorcas up. Now he’s growing antsy, well, more so than he usually is. 

Today construction starts on Starlight, and today the team is going to be meeting the owners of the Tigers Eye Resort. The two older women happily offered free lodging, with a hint of warning of the summer rush that will come in a few weeks. 

Evan guesses they're glad that someone finally bought the junkyard of the building with a plan to use it for something good. Whatever their reasonings are, Regulus is thankful they're so generous with their offer.

Now with Dorcas finally on the island the entire team is present, meaning they can start on details and finally get started on the most important part of Starlight. The menu. 

Dorcas smiles a bit, her locks neatly tied up in a bun that rests on her head, with a starfish bandana to add a hint of flavor. She rests easily in the passenger seat, watching Regulus like she knows every single thing about him.

She does, but that's not the point.

“We are staying at a resort for god's sake. I think it's fine if we relax a little, especially since it's just the beginning of the construction process.” Dorcas says lightly, reaching over to pat his arm as he glares at the road. “Maybe this is your chance to get the stick out of your ass and have some fun.” 

“I don't need fun, Dorcas.” Regulus snaps before roughly pulling into the large parking lot of the resort. Dorcas let out a string of curses, her hands shooting out to grab the handles of the rental car. Once he pulls into the valet, he puts the car in park and takes out the keys, raising a brow at her like he's done nothing wrong.

“You're an ass.” she huffs, before unbuckling her seatbelt.

“Trust me, I'm well aware of that fact.” Regulus deadpans back before undoing his own seat belt and getting out, tossing the keys to a young man dressed in the resort colors. The entire theme is very red.

“Mrs. McGonagall is being very generous to us. Her and her wife have agreed to let us stay until opening night of Starlight.” Regulus starts to explain to Dorcas as they walk through the large glass double doors into a very large and highly decorated lobby. Everything About Tigers Eye is bright and loud, a perfect place for summer loving freaks who need a break from the everyday world. 

Regulus can see why it's so popular just by the way the place is designed. It's classy in an old money sort of way, having beautiful carved beams and hard to keep plants laying around the place for a more natural feel. Even the floors shine with a sort of shimmer, like the ground itself knows this place is unlike no other.

All of this and they get to say here free of no charge. Regulus feels it's way too good to be true, already waiting for the other shoe to drop as Dorcas and him join the others who are relaxing on one of the many couches in the sort of lounge area surrounded by their own bags.

Pandora has her feet propped up on Barty’s legs, reading a pamphlet about things to do here. Evan is leaned back, slouching against the left side of Barty, half asleep while Barty himself is grinning to himself with his book of evil plans.

“They Certainly look like they're on vacation.” Dorcas comments, which catches their attention. Pandora drops the pamphlet with a wide smile, jumping up from the couch to wrap her arms around Dorcas's neck. 

“Oh, you've made it! Isn't it so lovely here? You're going to love the location of Starlight.” She rambles as the two men on the couch shake their heads fondly at the sight of them reuniting. 

They've been apart for three days yet act like it's been eleven years. 

Regulus holds back any sort of snarky comments he would like to make because two older women come from behind the front desk, wearing big welcoming smiles. Dorcas and Pandora split apart to greet the pair as they came over. Barty stands up, adjusting another gaudy patterned shirt.

“Alright gang, this is Mrs. And Mrs. McGonagall, the owners of Tigers Eye.” He announces. Everyone exchanges handshakes and small words with each of the women before the shorter one gives a soft laugh.

“Please, my dear, call me Poppy.” Poppy says before turning to her wife, gently tugging at her arm lovingly. “And call her Minnie. We are all friends here.” 

Minnie nods, looking over each of the Starlight staff with an air of curiosity. She holds a sterner look than her wife, who seems to be far more relaxed. Her gaze stays on Regulus longer than the others for just a moment before she looks back at her wife. “Yes, we are all friends here. I'm particularly pleased we have someone to share the beach front with. Many of our guests over the years have been wanting a closer place to dine at besides our provided meals.” 

“I've heard you do all sorts of things for the guests' food.” Pandora says with a smile, rocking on her feet unable to contain her curiosity and excitement. 

Poppy Nods. “Yes, our head chef is coming back again this year. The regulars are quite fond of his dishes and kitchen management.” she explains, before giving them a sheepish look. “I'm sure it's not as fine dining as your lovely restaurant will be, but it is special in its own kind of way.” 

“How many people do you have in your kitchens?” Regulus cannot help but ask, his brain constantly moving to see how others control their kitchen and business. Minnie hums, before looking directly at him again. Her eyes seem to be searching for something, but Regulus isn’t sure of what exactly. 

“We have a head chef from a notable school, and around two prep cooks.” 

“A bit understaffed, eh?” Evan drawls in amusement. 

“Quite. We have a small staff that runs the place, but they do it so perfectly it would be a danger to bring anyone else on to ruin their flow.” Minnie explains. “Though our cooking staff has taken a blunder due to other circumstances.” 

“I suppose we could help out a bit then, since you're letting us stay free of charge.” Regulus says which makes Dorcas and Evan shoot looks at him. Barty and Pandora have no qualms with the offer, just sending smiles to the couple.

Poppy's smile widens and she nods, coming over to take Regulus’s hands in hers. “Oh, that would be lovely, though don't push yourself. You are guests and we'd love for you all to have a wonderful stay here.”  She says kindly as Minnie nods in agreement behind her.

“Our Season staff will be arriving soon; they've been briefed on your visit.” Minnie explains.  “Things typically do not get busy until around the second week of June when Tigers Eye fully opens to the public. You're free to use any of the accommodations we have, and our kitchens if you would like.” 

“Thank you, truly.” Barty says, moving to shake both their hands once again. Regulus takes another moment to glance around the main part of the lounge area.

His attention is brought back to the conversation at the mention of their rooms, where he gladly follows to see where he will be resting for a while. His annoyance at the situation has been somewhat calmed now that he's met the owners and deemed them not sketchy.

If his friends want to relax while they prepare for Starlight, who is he to stop them? Regulus takes the time to remind himself that it is not a House of Black working project where all you do is work work work until you physically can't anymore.

No, this is his. All his and he refuses to repeat the mistakes his family made over again. He will not be another Orion. Maybe I can relax a bit, he tells himself as his hands reach down to touch his front pocket. Inside holds a small baggy that will definitely calm his nerves down and put him in a far better mood.

Each room provided for them is worth more than an arm and a leg. Regulus sits in his room alone; his bags open resting on the bed forgotten in place of the pipe in his hand as he leans over the balcony.

An ocean view, the Mcgonagalls have chosen to spoil them. The glass door remains shut, hoping to keep the smoke and smell from the actual room as he blows the smoke from his lungs into the ocean air. 

The nerves that have built up have gone quieter with each hit, a small sedation in the tension his body naturally provides. Taking another deep breath, he rushes the smoke from his lungs at a knock on the door.

Waving it all away and holding in a burning cough, he chokes it down with a strangled noise, hoping the red in his eyes wouldn't instantly give him away.

“Hi, I'm lily.” A redheaded woman smiles up at him as he answers the door with a raised brow. Regulus lets his eyes dance over her figure. She’s almost the same height as him yet sun-kissed and blessed with constellations of freckles. “Minnie asked me to give you and your friends a quick tour of the place so you can find your way around more.” She explains as she pulls out a pamphlet from her belt, handing it over to him.

“Right.” Regulus says, trying to clear his throat as he distracts himself, taking the pamphlet. Lily lifts her head up and takes a couple of sniffs before smiling back at him, stepping forward a bit closer.

“We do have smoke rooms; I'll be sure to show you. There is a no smoking policy inside the rooms specifically.” 

“Sorry, I didn't know.” He did know. There’s quite literally a no smoking sign right next to his head as they speak. Lily can easily see through the lie, but she doesn't seem angered by it, more amused as she nods and motions for him to follow. Quickly grabbing his pair of sunglasses, he tucks them into his shirt pocket before following her stride down the hall where the others are waiting.

“Mate, you reek.” Barty laughs once Regulus joins them. Evan shakes his head with a grin as Pandora and Dorcas come to either side of Regulus, knowing high Regulus means affectionate Regulus. 

“You wanted me to relax so I am.” Regulus deadpans, leaning his head onto Pandora's head when she nuzzles into his cheek. Dorcas giggles, brushing the curls from his face, plucking the sunglasses from his pocket to set them on his head, using his sunglasses as a headband. Looking at them unamused, he lets them have their fun as they drag him along to see all the sights and make plans for what they're going to do on their stay. 

Turns out Tiger's Eye is twenty times bigger on the inside than the outside shows. There're many different shops nestled inside, owned by locals from the nearby town. Then there's the large dining room and the event room that rest beside each other.

Lily went on a tangent about the parties that often take place. 

They get shown a quick glimpse of the kitchens and some of the behind-the-scenes areas that only staff see. Then, Lily makes sure to take them to the smoking lounge, and randomly placed gym.

Then of course, one of the main reasons guests come to Tigers Eye, the three large pools that look over the beach. Why would you need pools near a beach? Regulus has no clue, but even from the small flower lined path they're walking on, it looks relaxing.

He's not usually fond of pools. They often mean getting water splashed on you and your things, screaming children and a whole headache. Thankfully, there's a kid pool, a hot tub and a large grand pool in the middle for everyone.  

“We have a couple of lifeguards who watch over the Pool and big groups that go down to the beach.” Lily offers Insights to any of their questions, answering and giving facts like a well-oiled machine. Regulus is sure she's spoken the same sentences about a billion times before this. 

“The pool doesn't close till 1am, but children are to be out by ten. The rest are adult hours.”

“Oh, that's nice." Dorcas says, nodding along as they walk through the gates to the inside. The gates are twisted in beautiful patterns, the dark colors bringing out all the tones of the neatly planted and potted flowers around. Big trees offer a nice break from the sunshine along with big canopies that are colored in bright reds and yellows. 

Regulus eyes the lounge chairs knowing for a fact he will find himself there one of these days reading a book or working on the menu layout. Then, in his scanning of the area he sees it.

Well, not it . A man.

A very attractive man who's walking up to the group with a somewhat cocky grin. Regulus tenses, his own eyes betraying him as he drops his gaze to the man's dark toned body. It's hardly opening day yet the man- one of the lifeguards on closer inspection- seems to be ready to jump into the pool at any moment. 

Dark curls, big glasses, shirtless and oh god he's coming closer. 

Regulus gently pulls away from Pandora's hold, bringing his sunglasses back down to rest on his nose bridge as he refuses to look anywhere at the man.

“Lily! You've already got your hooks into our new friends huh?” The man laughs, stopping in front of the redhead with his hands on his hips. The red swim trunks he's wearing are way too small, Regulus decides but cannot help himself from glancing down before looking back to those curls. 

Lily rolls her eyes fondly, putting her hands on her own hips to match his stance. “I'm doing my job, James.” She reminds before nodding her head to the group. “This is the Starlight Crew.” 

“Barty Crouch, nice to meet you.” Barty steps forward with a devilish grin, his hand out to shake James's. James grins widely back, taking Barty's hand in a firm handshake before glancing over everyone else. 

His eyes connect with Regulus's and Regulus is thankful for the dark shades that hide the panic in his own eyes. He's far too high to be around an attractive man. Sure, the eye candy will be nice, but Regulus knows he's got higher chances of making a fool out of himself now more than if he were sober.

“This is my Co-owner and the head chef.” Barty says, nodding over in his direction which almost brings a flush to his pale cheeks. Almost. He has some restraint. “The others are staff, founders in their own ways.” 

Meeting James’s friendly gaze once again, Regulus does what he does best, sticking his nose up and putting on that front like he doesn't care at all. 

“Head chef huh? I wonder how you compare to our Remus.” James jokes like Regulus should know who the hell Remus is. Though with context clues he guesses that's the chef here for Tigers Eye. 

“I'm more than confident in my skills, Mr…..?” 

“James Potter.” 

“Regulus.” He offers his name back, making sure not to add the dreaded last name that haunts every single thing it's written on. James raises one brow, looking down to meet more of Regulus’s height. 

“Just Regulus?” He teases a bit. 

Regulus can't fight the eye roll, his friends know he just did. James could probably tell too, by the small laugh that he somehow fully expressed with every part of his body. Crossing his arms, he lets his body sink to one side with an amused sigh. 

“Just Regulus.” Regulus confirms which makes the man smile wider. 

“Well, just Regulus, the water here is my domain, so if you need anything I'm your man. From swimming lessons, a guided trip to the beach to even cpr.”  James grins, wiggling his brows at the last part. It quickly dissolves when Lily wacks him with a handful of pamphlets. 

“Ignore him, he's an idiot.” Lily tells them with an exasperated look before waving them on to follow across the long stretch of pools to the other side. Pandora and Barty are giggling like fools, but Evan and Dorcas have their sights on Regulus who quickly follows behind Lily. He can't help but glance behind his shoulder, meeting those big brown eyes once more.

The familiar tingling in his gut sends two emotions running through his system. Pure dread and pure bliss. He knows where he will be spending his time when not slaving over the Starlight menu.

And he knows those brown eyes will be watching him just as much. Even if it is the lifeguard's job. 

“Ready for this vacation, just Regulus?” Evan teases as he falls onto step to match Regulus’s stride out of the pool gates.

“Watch it Rosier, I'm in charge of your income.” Regulus warns with a growl before gently shoving Evans arm. The shove wasn't enough to even knock down a toddler, yet Evan dramatically falls into one of the bushes. Lily watches the group with an amused glint as Pandora can't stop giggling to help get her brother out, while Barty pulls a camera from God knows where to snap a Picture. 

“Vacation.” Dorcas Sings softly, smiling up to Regulus who sighs in defeat.

“Vacation.” He agrees, glancing back at the attractive man who sends him a wave.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

The tour had ended with the Starlight Crew making a friend out of Lily, who gladly partook in every quip and tease Evan and Barty threw her way. Regulus had started to feel more at ease, seeing how light the atmosphere is here at the resort.

Or possibly Barty had got him very good weed. 

Regulus retired to his rooms to finish unpacking his bags then sat down on his balcony to read a chapter of Frankenstein. Two or three hours passed before Regulus felt that stupid feeling in his limbs. All he knew was the familiar restless feeling climbing in his body, begging him to do something, anything. Only two things crossed his mind. Heading to the kitchen to see if he could steal a spot to work on the menu, or to take a trip downstairs near the pools to enjoy the sight of the beach. 

Just the beach, Regulus tells himself as he slips on his chef's coat, adjusting the sleeve that has an embroidered RB at the end of his cuff.

He finds himself in the backhouse of Tiger's Eye, looking around the unfamiliar kitchen for pots and pans, anything he can use to get his mind off the terribly attractive man, his parents, the menu. All of it slips away once he takes out his knife ready to sharpen. 

Sharpening and cleaning tools are the worst things to some chefs, but to Regulus, it's more helpful than therapy. He can make everything the way he wants in his own kitchens with his own tools. And when dinner service comes, sure it may all unravel into chaos, but it's the only chaos that he's ever craved. The only thing he dreamt about while staying underneath his parent's watchful eyes. 

Leaving was the best choice for him, and this feeling- the one he so desperately holds onto, is the universe's way of confirming the thought.

“Behind.” A man's voice snaps Regulus from his blissful daydreaming, hard crashing him back into reality. Blinking, Regulus turns his head to see a tall lanky man use one hand to tug on his shirt, the other holding himself steady with a cane. 

The man meets Regulus’s eyes, but Regulus is too busy looking him over to care about the questioning glance. This must be Remus , Regulus supposes before turning back to finish his knife set. A strange looking man, scars and all but in the back of any kitchen there's always very very questionable figures. 

“You must be the guests Minnie warned us about.” Remus speaks, moving to start his own kitchen prep alongside Regulus. Regulus nods, setting down his things neatly before passing the stone to the other chef.

“Yes, I am one of them. I'm Regulus, the head chef and co-owner of Starlight.” Regulus informs him only because he knows it will explain the reasoning why he's in this man's workspace. Remus doesn't look bothered by it though, leaning the cane next to the island, before working on his own knives. He does however have the feeling to talk, which Regulus hoped would go away soon. 

“Starlight?” 

“Seafood fine dining.” 

“Ah, you wanna be one of them fancy places.” Remus muses, before looking up to see the pull of Regulus's unamused look. It doesn't deter him though, he just Chuckles. “I've worked in quite a few of those.” He adds. 

“The seafood ones?” Regulus asks, only a little curious of the chef. He watches as Remus shrugs his shoulders before setting his knife down, reaching over for the stack of empty containers. 

“Some of 'em. Worked on a cruise for a while and I was on the fish station. Then I worked at some weird gourmet chicken place.” Remus chuckles before making a face. “Experimental chicken. I was glad to leave.” 

Regulus feels his lips twitch as he chuckles a bit before leaning on the island with a sigh. There's a bit of comfortable silence that passes between the two men: only the sound of the knives grinding against the stone. 

“Do you need any help?” Regulus finally asks, letting his eyes look around at the empty kitchen. “I'm not one for relaxing and I haven't done a single productive thing today.” 

“You sure? Aren't you vacationing?” Remus asks, before looking up to the list of all the prep has to do for tonight's welcome dinner. The man bites the side of his scarred lip, and Regulus briefly wonders if that's partly the reason why his lips are so scarred. It certainly doesn't explain the ones across his cheeks and nose. He's a thousand percent certain there's more that dip below his shirt. 

Not that he was wondering what was under his shirt.

Regulus shrugs his shoulders, rolling his head to look to the other side of the kitchen. “This isn't supposed to be a vacation. We are working.” Regulus sighs, the annoyance clear as he picks up his knife again. He can see himself in the reflection of the steel. He looks exhausted but feels restless. “Even If they've tricked half of my brain into thinking so.”

“Well, I could use a hand ... .just don't tell Minnie I put you to work, yeah?” 

“I'm sure she'd love to hear we are working off this free stay.” Regulus deadpans, reaching over for the list of prep the other chef must have jotted down on the way here. “Any allergies?” The question comes naturally, the first thing he always asks.

“A couple; but I've already substituted everything.” 

“Good, where do you want me?” Regulus rolls his sleeves up a bit, moving to go wash his hands in one of the sinks. Behind him, Remus grins, grabbing his cane so he can walk over to a shelf of empty plastic containers. 

“We've got a lot of chopping to do.” Remus tells him before bringing the stack over and setting it down. “Ever made a truffle risotto?” 

“About a billion times.” Regulus answers, already mentally planning exactly what he needs. Remus does the same and soon the two fall into an easy rhythm working around each other. Remus helps Regulus find where things are, and Regulus finds himself chatting with Remus about their times in culinary school down to the strange back of house they've worked with. 

It was all relaxing, the perfect way to cook. That is until he's turned to heat up a chicken broth on the stove only to jump when spying two green eyes peering up at him from over the island.

“Jesus!” Regulus mutters before glancing away to make sure the heat isn't too high. Of all the things he dealt with in kitchens, there was never a random toddler staring him down. “You know who this kid is?” He calls out to Remus who either hasn't noticed yet or doesn't care.

It's the latter. Remus looks up from the pan he's sauteing onions in, then down to the boy. “Oh, yeah that's Harry. He's the…. inspector.” 

“The inspector?” 

“Yeah, I watch!” Harry grins, before padding his way over to Remus. Remus puts a hand in the boy's curls as Harry clings to his legs to Remus’s good side. “Who's the fake uncle?” 

Remus chuckles. “Fake uncle?” He questions before sending Regulus a half apologetic glance and half amused one. “That's Regulus, he's a special guest of Minnie’s.” 

“The guy who makes yummy food like you?” 

“Mhm.” Remus hums, paying attention more to the hot pan than Harry. Regulus goes back to the pot, unsure what to even say about the toddler who keeps glancing back over to him. Regulus has never been good with children, and he's certain he will never be. The only child he partly likes is Pandora's daughter, only because the girl sleeps when Regulus is around. 

“Can I have grilled cheese?” Harry asks to break the silence. Remus glances at the clock before gently stirring his pan. “It's almost time for dinner Harry. Is that what you want for dinner?” 

“No, I want chicken nuggies.”

“Of course you do.” Remus sighs playfully, used to the boy's pallet. Regulus however turns around at that and glances down to Harry.

“You don't eat risotto? It's delicious.” He asks the toddler, forgetting to change his tone. But Harry doesn't seem to shy away at the tense energy of Regulus. Instead, he keeps those big eyes on him before sticking his tongue out. 

“There's gross green stuff in it.” 

“Vegetables?” 

“Chicken nuggets are better.” 

“Have you even tried it?” Regulus asks, bending down a bit to make full eye contact with Harry. Remus’s body shakes as he holds in the laughter, watching Regulus arguing with a child about the wonders of actual food rather than frozen chicken. 

Harry pouts at the question, letting go of Remus to cross his arms. “No, and I don't want to!” 

“Your parents have a handful to deal with. What do you eat other than chicken?” 

“Grilled cheese and chips and biscuits and-” 

“ Real food.” 

“That is real food!” Harry giggles like Regulus is the culprit here who's never changed his pallet. Sighing in defeat, Regulus stands back up to send Remus an annoyed look, but Remus just laughs along with Harry.

“I don't know Harry, seems like our new friend has a point. What do you eat?” Remus teases, making Harry stomp his foot in protest to the betrayal. 

“I eat all things!”

“Then bite this.” Remus snatches a chopped piece of broccoli from one of the containers. Harry's face grows green at the sight, and he takes off, screaming about how yucky it will be. Once the double doors slam shut, the two men make eye contact and laugh for a moment. 

He likes Remus, Regulus realizes as he calms down enough to go back to cooking. The man is easy to talk to, and easy to let his guard down with. Laughing with a stranger, it reminds him of how much he's changed through the years.

Seventeen- year-old Regulus Black would rather die than speak to a person he doesn't deem suitable, which was everyone. “Little crotch demons I swear.” Regulus mutters which sends Remus into another chuckle.

After a couple of hours, the two chefs bring out plates of Risotto and Lobster bisque, and yes, a plate of chicken nuggets. The dinner will be happening out at the pool under one of the large canopies that hold a long banquet table to sit the staff, including the Starlight Team. 

Regulus hadn't noticed the lights before, but there's many wrapped around the poles of the tents, and many solar ones stuck into the ground lighting the paths. He spots his friends who've already started speaking to the staff and slips his way over to Evan who's leaning back on a lounge chair with a fancy drink in his hand.

One he definitely did himself at their bar. Evan only drinks things he made and no one else's. 

“You made yourself busy.” He notes when Regulus sits down at the end of the chair, reaching for the drink in Evans hands. He lets Regulus take it, watching as he takes a large unrefined chug. 

“Met the head chef here.”

“Does he fit your standard, your highness?” 

“Shove off.” Regulus grumbles, handing the drink back to Evan without acknowledging half of it is now gone. It’s not like he cares anyways; Evan will just go make himself another. Sighing, he takes the time to look around at the staff of Tigers eye. Many of them have made it to the table, grabbing a plate to eat, Harry included who's sitting on a pool chair with his plastic plate on his lap.

“Man moony, you're cooking makes my heart swoon!” A loud voice calls out with a few scattered chuckles in response. The person making a fool of themselves is loud, annoyingly loud but Regulus tries to ignore him to get some of the food at the table. Rising from the chair to make him and Evan a plate, he weaves through some dancing bodies as music starts to play from a speaker. 

“Oi, let him breathe.” Lily's voice calls out in a laugh, as Remus is seemingly being attacked by God knows what. Regulus finally makes it to the table where Remus is on the other side of, his long-scarred hand on the waist of another person. He chuckles, rolling his eyes at whoever it is that's thrown themselves at the man.

“Hey Reggie.” Barty comes bustling over to him, looking pale and unusually out of breath. His grip on his drink is nearly breaking the cup, and his eyes are wide, glancing around with a slight grimace. “You know, how about we move away from over here and go bother Dorcas?” 

Regulus looks up from the plate, raising a brow. “What did you do? I told you we have to be good here, Barty. This isn’t a place for you to fuck up.” 

“Hey, it's not me!” Barty snaps back before turning his head to the side. “ This time. This time it's not me, but that doesn't matter. Let’s go.” he says and reaches for Regulus’s arm to tug him away from the table. Regulus pulls back, planting his feet firmly on the ground. 

“What is wrong with you today?” 

“Nothing I just-” 

“Yo Sirius! We need some better music than- oh.” A short woman with choppy blonde hair freezes at the sight of Barty and Regulus, blinking in confusion for a moment. Regulus’s blood runs cold as the name echoes in his mind. “Sorry, I thought you were someone else.” The woman gives a small giggle. “Man, you both look like vampires, you know.” She snorts, not knowing the rollercoaster of emotions she’s just sent him through.

Barty takes in a sharp breath, looking from the woman to Regulus who quickly puts the plate on the table, all his survival instincts kicking in at once. 

There's no way , he thinks to himself, looking around the pool like a madman. Theres no fucking way Sirius, that specific Sirius is here of all places. No. 

Regulus almost makes himself feel better, but it’s quickly damped by the reminders that there's literally barely few people named by the stars. Oh god, oh fuck! Does he know I'm here? Regulus goes into a full-blown panic, not even noticing that Barty has dragged him away from the table and back over to Evan who's now sat up in surprise at the familiar sight of a freaking out Regulus.

“You knew, you fucking knew.” Regulus hisses and grabs Barty’s arm, nails digging into his flesh. He doesn't mean to be rough, he doesn't want to be but holy fuck his estranged brother is at the resort he’s at. On the same fucking island! 

“Chill out Regulus, of course I didn’t fucking know until I saw a carbon copy of you down the bloody hall.” Barty whispers back before ripping Regulus’s hand off of his arm where small crescents are indented in his skin. “Hey, hey you need to breathe man. No panicking right now.”

“I'm panicking!” 

“Right, right.” Barty nods and hands him his drink. “Maybe go say something, so it's not a let's hide Regulus for three months kind of vacation.”

“No, no I don't want to see him.” Regulus shakes his head before turning and catching sight of the person hanging off of Remus. There he is, Sirius Black, his older brother who unknowingly paved the way for Regulus to get the fuck out of their family's claws. The very same person who beat the shit out of him before he ran, the person who didn't show up to their dads' funeral, didn't reply to any letters, or calls, nothing. 

His hair is longer than Regulus’s but just as black. Their skin matches in paleness, around the same height. They could be fucking twins thanks to the Black genes, and Regulus is highly aware how much they look like their mother. Reeling on seeing a new older version of his big brother, they make eye contact from across the pool, both freezing at the sight of each other.

Sirius does a double take before looking into his cup with a frown, probably wondering how much he had already drank tonight. Then when the relaxing image of Regulus isn't fading away, he pushes past his coworkers and friends in a hurry, making everyone's attention go all to him like always.

“You- you-” Sirius starts as he makes it closer, his cup thrown on the ground, eyes wild with confusion, anger and shock. “Theres no fucking way. Regulus? You're here, at a resort ?” 

“That's the first thing you're going to take a dig at?” Regulus deadpans, feeling like a bird with ruffled feathers. “Why are you here?”

“Why are you here? I work here.” Sirius says, coming to stop a good distance away as if scared to get any closer. Why should he be scared? Regulus is the one who got his ass beat when Sirius left the house, not just him. “Wait, you're one of the starlight owners?” Sirius connects the dots, which partially surprises Regulus given the fact he's sure Sirius still isn't much of a thinker.

Nodding, Regulus crosses his arms and shoots daggers at his brother. “Head chef and co-owner.’ he confirms which just makes Sirius laugh bitterly. Tapping his foot, he watches as Sirius takes a daring step closer, examining every single thing about himself. 

“Using Orion's money, huh?”

“It's my money now, the bastard is dead.” Regulus deadpans back with just as much venom which makes anyone listening pause in shock. “You would know that if you fucking looked in any papers or you know, responded to any letters.” 

Sirius glares, closing and opening his fists near the sides of his body. Up closer, Regulus can see his brother had littered his skin head to toe in tattoos. Moons, stars, words regulus doesn't have the patience to try to read. “What about the witch?” 

“She’s staying with the Lestranges as of late.”

Sirius scoffs at the news. “So what, Baby Reggie finally went and turned his back on the cult? It's hard to believe that, considering what a stuck up little prick you are.”

“Oh, I'm still stuck up. And you're still the same child who can't be civil to save his life.” Regulus responds before turning to walk away, not wanting to fight with Sirius on the first night of him being at Tiger's Eye. 

Sirius lets out an offended noise and follows Regulus’s trail as others try not to act like they're watching the scene go down. The music blares from the speakers to drown out their mumbles to each other. “Oi, where are you going? Are you running away, Reggie?” Sirius mocks, reaching out to grab Regulus's wrist. 

The second he feels Sirius’s cold fingers on his skin, he freezes then tries to jerk his hand away but Sirius has got a pretty good hold on him. “Let go.” Regulus growls, tugging once more to no avail. 

Sirius shakes his head. “No, you're going to say right here and tell me why the hell you're here. I don't believe that you're some innocent chef who wants to open a restaurant on Serpentine Beach.”

“What else would I be?” Regulus scoffs and tries to get free again. The two struggle back and forth, both glaring daggers at each other. “Honestly, you think I haven't changed in five years? Get a grip Sirius!” Regulus yells before tugging as hard as he can. 

He gets free but at what cost? Losing his footing near the pool, he takes a bad step back and slips right into the eight foot part of the adult pool. Sirius watches him fall with wide panicked eyes as the splash catches everyone's attention.

“Fuck, fuck he can't swim! James, he can't swim!” Sirius screams as Lily and Remus run over along with Dorcas and Barty. James dives into the water before Regulus can push up from the bottom of the pool.

Breaking up to the surface, Regulus struggles against James who thinks he’s helping Regulus not drown. James gets the message when Regulus shoves him roughly away so he could float on his own in the water, glaring at everyone like a drowned cat.

“Oh my god Regulus!” Sirius screams

“Would you shut the fuck up?! You're like a goddamn yapping dog.” Regulus snaps before he realizes it's the hot lifeguard who's in the water with him. Trying to hide the flush from the prying eyes and the feelings of seeing James in a wet tight shirt, Regulus shakes his head before swimming over to the edge to pull himself out

Yes, swimming. 

“I can fucking swim, you idiot.” He hisses as plops the dry ground with a loud splat. Standing up, feeling soaked to the bone with the horrid smell of chlorine stuck to his clothes, he glares down at his older brother who replaces the worried yelling to a sheepish grin. “I'm not a child anymore.” 

“Hah…yeah sorry Reg.” Sirius says, forcing out a laugh at the commotion they've caused. No, that Sirius caused all on his own. Flinging water from his face, Regulus huffs like a bull before turning on his heel to walk out, making sure to flip Sirius off in the process as he makes the journey back to his room. He takes one last look at the semi grumpy look on Sirius’s face as Lily starts to yell at him for upsetting the guests, while James sits on the edge of the pool.

His brows are furrowed, glasses off on his lap as he watches Regulus walk away to the gate.

They hold eye contact for a moment and Regulus feels his face grow warm before he pouts, turning away and slamming the gate once he's passed through.

Sirius is here, ruining his summer already. Not only has he embarrassed himself in front of most of the staff and his own friends, he's also embarrassed himself in front of the hot lifeguard who surely won't give him the time of day now.

“Fucking vacation my ass.” He grumbles in the elevator on the way up to his room, watching his reflection as he drips pool water everywhere. He hopes it is Sirius who has to clean it.

[whimsicalcrying]

Serpentine Beach: Prologue

Pairing: James Potter x Regulus Black

Summary: Regulus buys a run-down shack on a pretty beach hoping to turn it into a five-star restaurant. Lucky for him, across the stretch of Serpentine Beach sits the looming Tigers Eye Resort, who's owners generously let him, and his team stay. At Tigers eye Regulus is faced with his past, present and future.

w/c: 1.5k

a/n: This is part of a nine-chapter fic I'm working on for my ao3 account. I may post the chapters here, but if not, I will put the link for it here (hopefully by June 6th). Anywho, enjoy this little teaser!

Feedback is always helpful and appreciated!

Ao3 M.List ch.1

!Warnings!: mentions of drinking and some minor death :)

Prologue.

𓇼 ⋆｡˚ 𓆝⋆｡˚ 𓇼

Twelve-year old Regulus Black didn't like the sandy beaches his parents dragged the family to every summer holiday. The sand got stuck everywhere. In his clothes, in every fold of his body, and worse, the curls that would sit neatly on top of his head if it weren't for the salty wind messing them up every chance it would.

Twenty-one-year-old Regulus liked the beach a whole lot more. 

With the absence of his judging family of vampires, he finds having a fruity, very alcoholic drink in his hands laying under an umbrella suits him a lot more than he had previously thought. Sunglasses to protect his eyes, a half-unbuttoned dark shirt and more sunscreen than a ginger would need, Regulus had nothing to worry about on a beach. 

Perhaps that's why without even checking out the space, he handed Barty his checking information and bought the abandoned building that sat on the west side of Serpentine Beach.

There are no rocks littering the surface, just pure golden sand that burns the soles of his feet when he steps out of the gulf cart Barty just had to purchase when they arrived at the small little seaside town. Regulus’s mouth pulls back into a tight frown, which earns a boasting laugh from Barty who's already clad in a Hawaiian style shirt.

“Well, what do you think, Reg?” Evan asks, coming out of the gulf cart to stand next to him. Regulus lets his eyes trail the weather torn building, noting all the work- all the money it's going to cost to open his restaurant on this beach. Pandora comes to stand at his other side, fiddling with her camera and watching Barty run up the sea torn steps, nearly falling into a rotten wood trap.

“I think….” Regulus slips off his sunglasses to the tip of his nose, his eyes narrowed to block the sun and judge the bare bones of his restaurant. “We’re going to need some drinks and a contractor.”

“We did bring stuff for Pina coladas.” Pandora smiles, before lifting the camera to take a picture of the rundown building. 

“Perfect.” Regulus nods, pushing his sunglasses back up before strutting his way to the entrance. His expression is taunt, but the team knows his tone is laced with approval. 

Barty and Evan look at each other with matching grins, before watching Regulus walk the path to the building entrance like he owned the place. Well, he does own the place. Co-owns it with Barty who paid half with his father's government hush money. The rest came from the Blacks blood money, which Regulus now has full access to, given his father is six feet in the ground. 

He hopes the man is turning in his grave right now, or better yet, burning in hell. Regulus feels his lips twitch to smile, knowing full well the call his mother will give him when the money transfers out. His father hated her as much as he hated his children it seems, putting only Regulus on the will. 

He never expected to stay on it when he left years ago, just like his older brother did. Maybe Orion was tired of burning people off the family tree. Or maybe he foolishly thought Regulus would come running back home when his dreams of becoming a chef crashed.

But Regulus' dreams have not crashed. In fact, they're soon to be soaring.

If they squint, they could almost see the finished product in sight. Starlight fine dining, lined with tourists not just there for the beautiful beaches, but the food and service. 

“I’ll grab the stuff out the Gulf cart” Barty yells over the wind as he rushes to the gulf cart that holds the white rum bottles.

This will do, Regulus tells himself as he watches the ocean view. There's only one contender on Serpentine Beach, Tigers Eye resort which is North of them. A resort that will bring him tons of customers, and tons of revenue. 

This will do me well, he smiles at the crashing waves. The scene is peaceful, almost serene until a loud crash pulls Regulus from his mind vacation, back to reality. Spinning around, he sighs at the sight of Pandora holding the broken door with all her body weight while Evan laughs. Barty makes his way back up, holding the things for their celebratory drinks. 

“It's a fixer upper.” He tells Regulus as he shakes his head and grabs the rum bottle. 

“We need somewhere to stay while we build.” Regulus decides, before glancing to the right where the looming sight of Tigers Eye Resort sits over a long stretch of beach between the two buildings. The only thing dividing them is a long fishing pier in between.

“Well, it's not like we aren't a couple miles from a fancy resort.” Evan deadpans as he helps Pandora with the broken door. The two set it on the rail, only for the wood to crack and send the door and the railing down a few feet to the sand with a rough crash. 

Regulus pushes his sunglasses on top of his head, letting them rest in his curls. “Get in contact with the Tigers eye owners. We'll see if they'll help us out a bit.”

“Aye aye captain,” Barty says. 

“Oh, Dorcas will be so excited.” Pandora laughs, clapping her hands happily. 

“Oh, I'm sure she will be.” Regulus mutters, before stepping through the now doorless restaurant. “Remember guys, this isn't a vacation. We have work to do.” 

“Okay Regulus.” Evan fakes a sigh before grabbing the pina colada ingredients from Bartys arms. “We can still work and drink though, right B?”

“Hell yeah!” Barty agrees.

Regulus can't deny the excitement, shrugging off their blatant disregard for not wanting to work. He lets himself grin, letting the team into the building and gladly accepting the drink Evan puts his way. 

Because Regulus Black is not that little twelve-year-old boy anymore stuck in a cold home. He's twenty-one, drinking with his mates on a warm pretty beach, watching the sun go down.

𓆝 𓆟 𓆞 𓆝

“Well, that's odd.” Lily mumbles as she digs through her carry on, reading the back of a postcard of the Tigers Eye Resort. It rests easy in her hands, the news not sounding strange knowing her bosses, but not fully like them either.

James pokes his head over her shoulder, forgetting his duty of making sure Harry is all set for the flight. The toddler is busy talking off his uncle's ear, as Sirius sits the wrong way teasing Harry with the snacks he can't have until they're in the air.

“What's strange?” James can't help but to ask, making Lily dart her pretty green eyes off the postcard. 

“Minnie says it won't just be staff during pre-season.” She speaks, delivering the news lightly, a hint of interest in her tone. “Apparently we are hosting the new people who bought that run down shack on the west side.”

“That dump?” Sirius scoffs, letting the bag of nuts fall to Harry's lap. “I feel bad for whatever poor sod who got convinced to even look at the place.” 

“Remus, hit him.” Lily says lightly. There's a grunt in response, then a smack right on Sirius’s stomach.

“Fuck Moony!”

“Lily told me too.” Remus shrugs, not bothering to act sorry for the wack. Instead, he shifts his long legs in the cramped footing area, trying to get comfortable before he cramps up. His cane rests beside him, another weapon to be used at Lily's will. 

“Prong, control your wife.” Sirius whines playfully, earning an eye roll from everyone, including Harry. 

“Ex-wife.” James and Lily say at the same time before smiling at each other. James reaches out and finally gets Harry settled by the window. The toddler is excited, already wearing a flowery patterned green shirt, his curls pushed back in a small little headband.

“I'm sure whoever they are will have fun at the resort. It's good practice before the season starts, no?” James grins, always seeing the bright side of everything. Lily nods in agreement, but James gets no answer from Remus who's now got his eye mask on.

Sirius sinks in his chair, putting his buckle on just as the flight attendant walks past. “Sure Prongs. Let's just hope they aren't rich snobs trying to sabotage the resort.”

“That was one time.” James retorts. “I don't think Riddle Enterprises is going to try for any part of Serpentine Beach after what Minnie did to em.” 

“You never know Prongs, I sense evil.” Sirius jokes before the captain starts to speak on the speaker, talking right over them. 

James settles between his son and his ex-wife, buckling and staring over Harry's curls to look out the window. The four-year-old wiggles, excited to go back to Serpentine Beach and run around the resort he grew up going to while his family worked.

Sirius senses evil, but James feels like it's going to be another memorable summer. 

[whimsicalcrying]

I'll be honest idk what the hell I'm doing