aro-ace-chaos

[aro-ace-chaos]

Lately, I've been getting the sense that allo people simply... don't get what "spectrum" means in "asexual/aromantic spectrum."

The way they regurgitate the same argument of "ace people can still have sex/aro people can still date!" is starting to make me believe they don't view the spectrum as a community of sex-positive, sex-neutral and sex-averse people, but more as a general state of being. It's like they think every aroace person has the equal potential to be sex-positive as they have to be sex-averse and it's only a matter of choice or circumstance.

And that's just... NOT what's happening AT ALL. The spectrum isn't something innately assigned to a singular person, it doesn't define an aro/ace person as a gray canvas who can switch labels at will, but it represents the variety of many people who are either sex/romance positive, neutral, averse, favourable, negative etc. etc.

I feel like allo people simply don't understand that and it's especially obvious in how Alastor is treated. "Ace people can still have sex!" - said about the most obviously sex-averse asexual to ever exist.

(Not saying sex and romance favourable aspecs are invalid! Far from it. I'm just pointing out how allos believe someone repulsed can become favourable under the right circumstances. Which is just untrue.)

[aro-ace-chaos]

Pilot Alastor Aro, Ace, and Aroace icons

(Credit would be appreciated if you use these, because making him into a png for this was a pain lol)

And, as a bonus, here's the pngs so you can make whatever other icons you want! Again, credit would be appreciated since it took quite a while to separate him from the backgrounds.

[aro-ace-chaos]

Planet aro/ace/aroace dividers

[aro-ace-chaos]

People who say that asexuality isn't a spectrum, or that asexual shouldn't be the name of the spectrum because "a- means without" lack a fundamental grasp of what "without" means.

The word "without" is not the same as "completely, 100% without, there's absolutely none at all. Completely, entirely absent", and to imply it does (I think mostly unintentionally) feeds into the idea that asexuals (and in the same way, aromantics) are lacking something that is fundamentally human. Saying "I happen to not have that/ not much of that" is very different from saying "I lack that." We aren't lacking, we just happen to not have (or not have much of) ___ attraction.

You can be without something to an extent.

Maybe a completely unrelated physical example would help. I don't have freckles. As, in, I don't have a plethora of small, roundish brown spots on my skin numbering in the hundreds, in the way that people typically refer to as meaning someone has freckles as a trait, like in the image below.

However, I do have a very few amount of birthmarks/freckles on my arms. Does that mean I'm wrong in saying I don't have freckles, because I have maybe a dozen of them on my entire body? No, of course not!

A person "having freckles" as in the description of their appearance, typically refers to having, like, hundreds of freckles to the point that they are noticeable. The person in the photo below, I would not call freckled, even though technically, there are a few freckles on their skin. They are primarily without freckles.

Now, someone who literally has no birthmarks or freckles on their skin is completely without freckles, but it's still equally accurate to say the image above is a person who isn't really freckled.

Would you insist that the person in the second image is freckled, just like the person in the first image? I would certainly hope not.

Similarly, someone who barely ever experiences sexual attraction, or only does under highly specific conditions, etc, is not allosexual. They aren't even close to it. Acespec IS the umbrella term. Asexual is both the umbrella term and the identity at the far end of the spectrum that experiences absolutely 0 sexual attraction. If you really want a specific label for that far end of the spectrum that experiences absolutely 0 sexual attraction, it exists! Black stripe ace! Now, as with everything, there's always discourse, but as long as you aren't saying black stripe aces are the ONLY real aces, it's not exclusionary, it's just getting specific. Like, just be nice.

The same way identifying as bisexual vs. pansexual vs. multisexual vs. polysexual, etc is getting into more specific identities on the m-spec.

I think overall, it's more helpful and accurate to take the "without" definition of "a-" to mean "not having much of or any."

Asexuality is a spectrum.

(And, btw, ALL of this applies to the other a-specs)

(Not to mention that, although that's the meaning in isolation, prefixes and suffixes do slightly change in certain contexts. -phobia in terms of, say, arachniphobia primarily means fear, but in terms of homophobia, it primarily means hatred. In the end, language is fluid and evolves and is supposed to serve us, not the other way around. It is harmful to limit yourself to the exact definition of the way the word is structured, rather than what it has come to mean.)

[aro-ace-chaos]

22 | aroace | autistic | agender | she/they

(tbh idc what pronouns you use for me)

My main was turning into nothing but aroace posts, so I figured why not just start putting all that stuff on a fun sideblog?

Any dividers or icons or anything like that I make, you can feel free to use without credits (unless otherwise stated), just please don't repost.

The following is not welcome here:

Aphobia

Gatekeeping

Transphobia

General homophobia and/or queerphobia

Trump support

[aro-ace-chaos]

Hey just so we’re all aware, any sort of “gatekeeping” being asexual or aromantic is not allowed here. I will block you.

For one; it’s none of your business and if it isn’t hurting you hurting them or hurting anyone else don’t make it your business

For two: we have bigger issues then “oh but they have sex sometimes so they can’t be on the asexual SPECTRUM”

Also stop tagging me in your posts if you shitting on other asexuals and aromantics and their identities. I’m not going to participate in that bs

Also^2 there are some asexual and aromantic identities that I’m like “wtf is this” too but that doesn’t mean I’m a fucking exclusionary about it. I’m just like “kinda weird but go off ig” which is my reaction to mspec lesbians as well (y’all are valid; I just don’t understand it and probably never will. You’re VALID I just personally don’t understand it. Like I don’t understand brain surgery doesn’t mean I don’t believe in it)

[aro-ace-chaos]

I haven’t seen enough garlic bread memes recently

I’d kill someone for some good garlic bread

[aro-ace-chaos]

All characters are aro/ace/aroace until proven otherwise

[aro-ace-chaos]

Lavender Ace Flag:

|| My version of a 5 stripe Asexual flag, that matches the aro, aroace and other a-spec/ LGBTQIA+ flags (and is way more aesthetically pleasing in my opinion because of the symmetry and the colours). It's a flag for anyone on the asexual spectrum. (Feel free to use this if you like it!)

Possible meanings for the stripes:

black: asexuality

grey: grey ace spectrum

white: sexuality

lavender: queerness/ the queer community

purple: the ace community

lavender already exists in the LGBT+ community as a colour representing queerness, diversity and acceptance.

That makes lavender a really good fit for this new ace flag!

[aro-ace-chaos]

Aro, Ace, and Aroace Perry the Platypus Icons

[aro-ace-chaos]

Take some aro, ace, and aroace dividers made of fire because why not

no credits needed or anything like that, just use them if you want