mahalkitamully

[mahalkitamully]

writers block.

[mahalkitamully]

Innocence In Full Swing, Baby

Carl Grimes x fem!reader

Requested by @joc3lynx (girl I'm sorry, I went nuts for some reason)

CW: (carl is freshly 14 and reader is 13, innocent love, puppy dog love, kids in love, reader is an absolute love sick girl, angst, a lot of fluff, small slow burn on carl's part, reader is in love: carl is hesitant and wary, reader wears a skirt over jeans beware of that, reader has a female figure she has inner monologue about(not specified as a mother, but is motherly), slight rick slander on carl's end, awkward first period scene that I wanted to add, reader is a cringy 13 year old girl, hurt and comfort, self deprecating thoughts from carl, death blaming, angst, carl somehow knows how to deal with periods more than reader does idk, mentioned vomit but not too graphic, please try to ignore any grammar mistakes this is really long)

Word count: 5.5k

QUICK WARNING! THERE IS A VERY SMALL SCENE WITH VOMIT AND PUKING! I MARKED IT WITH: *

The cicadas and tree frogs rang in the young teen's ears, his blue eyes scanning over the horizon, hands clutching the gun. Sparing one last glance at his father, beaten and swollen, laying on the couch, the brunet closed the front door and walked down the porch stairs. The boy, now a teen, was very rebellious and heartbroken after The Governor's attack on the prison.

The loss of Judith?

Maggie?

Glenn?

Daryl?

Carol?

Beth?

Hershel?

It all weighed heavy on his shoulders. The image of his dad getting his ass handed to himself by The Governor kept replaying in his head.

Maybe if Rick wasn't such a pathetic, waste of space, everyone would still be together. Him, Judith, and Rick would still be together. He didn't even know if his friends– his family– were alive. They could all be dead for all he knows.

The bloodied car seat made his heart lurch. He remembered it vividly. Carl never wanted to see it. Think of it. Hear of it. Judith was gone.

All Carl wanted to do was blame Rick. Blaming his own father seemed harsh, but it seemed right. Right? He was in the same room with The Governor, and let him walk out alive. Unscathed even.

It was Rick's fault.

Carl could live without him.

Without the protection of his father. His weak father.

The farmer.

The man who only wanted to tend to his plants and fucking peas after the first fight with Woodbury.

Carl didn't need him.

The sound of his boots pounding on the asphalt of the deserted road was filled with the screeches of insects and the rustle of leaves. The scenery was nice. The muggy air not so much. Carl was used to it. The hot, soupy air of the scorching Georgia heat he grew up in.

The leaves were green. The smell of the dead was barely noticeable over the fresh air. Lawns overgrown from the lack of TLC Carl was sure they got. Whether from a housewife, devoted husband, old woman, or teen boy trying to start a business mowing lawns.

Carl could recall, before the Wildfire, the neighbor boy from a block down who would mow the lawn of their old house. Rick was happy to pay ten bucks for the boy to trim the grass.

Lori had been hesitant. Mostly worried about her small flower bed of pretty flowers she struggled to keep alive. His mother never was equipped with a green thumb.

Carl let out a small panicked yelp, torn out of his rushing thoughts when a walker grabbed him. His lanky arms struggled at the walker, eyes widening when another came behind the one he was already dealing with.

~

Perched on a small boulder, grimey fingers holding onto the golden chain of the old locket, your rough thumb pad rubbed over the small flower engraving on the golden, heart shaped pendant. You tried your best to keep it clean. It was the only thing you had left from her.

You remembered how her eyes always softened around you.

How smooth her skin was against you when she embraced your small body.

Her fingers gently tracing over your cheek.

As you dug your thumb nail into the small notch to open the pendant, you jumped when you heard a panicked yell. One that sounded human. Not like the animals you had heard after the walkers would get ahold of them.

Shoving the necklace in the shallow pocket of your skirt, you grabbed the handgun in your waistband, fingers curling around the rough grip. Standing up, and quickly jogging over. All you saw was a small wriggling figure under three walkers, a hat on the ground next to the pile, and the figure trying to aim the gun.

Raising the small .9 mm, you closed an eye, waiting for the little peg to rest perfectly on the walker's head while nestled between the notch. Holding your breath, you pulled the trigger.

The sound of the gunshot pierced through the air, the walker going limp over the still “alive” one. Carl quickly shot the walker, wincing as the gunshot was too close to his ears.

*

Quickly running over, you shot the one on the very top, helping the, now that you got a better look, young teen from under the pile of walkers. It was a small struggle. The two of you being only kids. Carl quickly leaned forward when he stumbled away, hands bracing on his knees while he vomited up the bowl of cornflakes from earlier.

*

After wiping his mouth with the sleeve of his dirtied flannel, Carl quickly raised the gun up at you, eyes dancing over your figure.

You were young. Like him. Maybe a little bit younger. Baby fat was still on your face, fingers still short while you used both hands to get a proper grip on the glock. Hell, even your outfit seemed almost…childish. The cotton skirt over the boot cut jeans, the pink tank top over the small lace camisole, your shoes were just a pair of sneakers.

Carl's glare didn't deeter, not at all. But he couldn't deny all the conflicting emotions he felt. His heart in his throat, knees a little weak, stomach doing somersaults. Carl just convinced himself it was adrenaline from the attack.

Totally.

His freckled cheeks weren't burning with a small flush. Not at all.

You, on the other hand, were already in love. This boy was gorgeous. Those icy blues staring into your soul. The cutest upturned, button nose. Soft pouty lips. Freckles dusting his cheeks– well, maybe that was just dirt.

Fuck if you know.

This boy was an angel from heaven. Probably sent to save you from the crippling loneliness.

“Uh, i-is that your hat?” you quietly asked, carefully clicking the safety on your gun and letting it drop at your side. Just to show that you weren't going to hurt him.

Carl's eyes hesitantly darted down to the sheriff hat on the ground by your scuffed up sneakers. It hurt him to see that hat on the ground. But tried to hide it, slowly stalking over, keeping the gun trailed on you.

Jumping a little, Carl took a tiny step back when you quickly bent over, grabbing the hat for him and holding it out with a smile. Obviously trying to make friends with him.

You reminded him of that one puppy that his neighbor next door used to have. A pudgy little labrador puppy who loved to play with the neighborhood kids. He could almost feel the puppy's tongue licking the melted ice cream from his hands and cheeks while he sat with his little friends on his front lawn.

Excited. Innocently so.

You still stared up at him, almost in awe while you kept the hat out to him, just waiting for him to take you up on the invite. Carl squinted his eyes, baby blues just about swallowed when he did so, hand slowly reaching out and yanking the leather hat from your hands.

Yeah, maybe Carl shouldn't have been so rough, but why did he care? He could shoot you dead. And he did think about it. But you did help him.

You did kill those two walkers that trapped him.

You did put your gun down.

Maybe, just maybe, you weren't a threat.

Carl let out a soft huff, setting the hat on his head, covering the dark, greasy locks of hair. “‘m Carl. Carl Grimes.”

Carl.

Wow.

Now that's the name of a real angel.

Nervous, you blurted out your name, ignoring the voice crack that sounded like it came from a thirteen year old boy.

The itch of a smirk kissed Carl's lips, but he tried to suppress it. Looking down at the small pile of walkers, awkwardly cleared his throat, glancing up at you for a second.

“...you stay around here?” Carl asked, still wary of you and your eager presence.

The nod you gave him made a tiny smile make its way on his face. Carl tried to hide his smile, gesturing for you to show him the way. Giving him a grin, you started back to the rock you like to hang out around.

The padding of your combined footfalls sounded the small, dead leaf covered trail. Carl was looking around, waiting for some trap or the exposure that you deceived him. He couldn't find any. Barely listening to you jabber about…something.

“This is so cool! I haven't been around a kid my age in two years now! We can be friends. Right?”

The way you oh-so innocently turned back to look at him made his heart flutter against his wishes. Swallowing thickly, Carl gave a small stiff nod, before freezing.

Did he really just agree to be friends with some weird girl he just met?

God, maybe Carl suffered some brain injury during the attack on the prison. Because he was acting fucking stupid.

“Awesome.” you smiled, stopping at the rock and grabbing your backpack.

Carl's blues watched you sling the small, purple backpack over your shoulder, and lean down, grabbing something else. Carl looked away for a split second, just for one damned second, and when his gaze trailed back to you, you were holding a sawed off shotgun.

Obviously, you weren't pointing it at him, just holding the heavy gun at your side. Carl stumbled back a little, grabbing the handgun from the holster on his thigh, raising it up at you and glaring.

Glancing at him, you panicked a little, then looked down at the shotgun in your hand. Quickly, you dropped the gun with an awkward laugh.

“N-not gonna hurt you! I jus' left it over here! I need to take it back home!” you scrambled to explain, raising your hands to reassure.

Did he really think you would hurt him?

That kinda stings.

You were only nice to him.

You didn't once attempt to hurt him.

Hell, you were excited to see another kid your age for the first time in a couple years.

Carl narrowed his eyes in suspicion, “...kick the gun over to me.”

You gave him a small confused look, furrowing your brow, before obeying and kicking it over to him. Carl bent down, grabbing the cool metal of the barrel, before slipping it down so his fingers curled around the worn, wood grip.

“I'll hold it for now.” Carl mumbled, gesturing for you to show him your home.

You walked back down the path with Carl by your side. He was still as suspicious as ever, but figured that if he was going to not need Rick anymore, he might try to make some sort of company. What if he wants to start his own group? Much like the one back at the prison. At the farm. In Atlanta. They were his family. Maybe he could start something like that himself.

~

You walked up to the family house, trying to ignore how much it hurt you to see it every time. You couldn't stay in the house. Not with her in there. Not with the groans from what was once her. You never could bring yourself to hurt her. But deep down, you knew that leaving her like that hurt more than anything could have.

You walked towards the side yard, pushing the creaking gate open and guiding Carl through the thick, overgrown backyard. There was a distinct path in the grass, and it split. One heading towards the back sliding door, the other towards the treehouse.

Carl followed, watching you set the backpack in the small pail that was tied to a rope and lead up to the treehouse, probably a makeshift pulley system. Silent, Carl's icy eyes followed your small form while you climbed up the planks nailed into the tree with familiarity and ease.

When you made it up to the top, the boy hesitated, before following up behind you with a small sigh. Out of the corner of his eye, Carl saw the metal bucket slowly get pulled up while you wound the hose reel that you wrapped the rope around.

Smart girl.

Lifting himself, Carl made it up on the small platform around the treehouse. It was cute, Carl had to admit.

Gotta give credit when credit is due.

A nice little fence guarding the small wooden structure, probably not too sturdy, but good enough. The wood was a light stain, well made, windows covered by plain sheets, a door barely held on by its hinges.

Next to the door, was a little flower pot with a few strawberry plants in it. They were small, but had a few little fruits on them. Some ripe, some not quite.

After you grabbed your backpack, you walked to the door, opening it and stepping inside. Looking over your shoulder, you gave Carl a sweet little smile.

“Comin’?” you hummed, walking inside. You tossed your backpack on the kiddie pool that was filled with pillows and blankets.

The brunet followed, his footsteps echoing in the small building. Looking around, his baby blues took in everything. The posters you sticky tacked on the wall, most from magazines. There was a small tote of arts and crafts supplies, a little makeshift table that was just an old crate.

Next to your kiddie pool bed was a punch of magazines. A random assortment of material.

Girls' World.

National Geographic Kids.

…Playboy?

Carl's eyes narrowed a little when he saw the scantily clad women on the covers.

He could recall seeing those at Shane's house when he would go over for a little sleepover they sometimes did. He couldn't remember what exactly they were for.

Naked women?

Sure, they were pretty–

No…not anymore. Now when Carl saw them, his heart was pounding and an unfamiliar stirring was in his lower tummy. But he ignored it when you started to show him some of your art pieces.

“I found some watercolors, so I've been playin' around with them.” you smiled, showing him the little swatches of the paints and the little experimental trees and fruits.

~

Carl just listened, sitting when you gestured to the throw pillow on the other side of the “table”. His blue eyes watched your hands carefully while you showed him the knots and weaving pattern for the bracelet.

Glancing down at the colors of string he chose, he carefully knotted the blue, cream, and gray colored floss together, leaving a little loop like you did. Carl couldn't deny, he was having fun. It almost made him forget about everything.

The prison.

Rick.

His family and friends.

You made him forget with your sweet and carefree attitude, the way you still acted like a kid even with the state of the world. Maybe you were what he needed. Maybe he needed that innocence that you carried. Maybe it would balance out his trauma.

“And then you just keep on with whatever color pattern you used–” you glanced up, eyes landing on Carl's slightly confused expression, obviously lost.

A tiny smirk slipped onto your lips, “You can just braid it if you want.”

The small scoff that left Carl's lips made you laugh a little, smirk now a goofy grin while you watched him like a love sick puppy. The two of you had a small conversation, just a little breaking the ice, you know–

‘how old are you?’

‘any family?’

‘favorite color?’

‘favorite food?’

The usual. Just innocent questions to start a friendship.

After the two of you finished your bracelets, you put the bracelet you made on Carl's wrist, and held out yours to signal him to put his on you.

“There! Now we're really friends!” you smiled brightly, holding your wrist next to his so the bracelets were next to one another.

Carl bit back a smile, glancing down at his boots, before looking back up at you. The boy remembered how his old friends would sit around together at recess, every Tuesday, and trade rocks.

Cool rocks they found at their houses, the park, the parking lot. Carl remembered getting a…geode? Maybe? That's what he remembered his friend calling it. His friend got it from a little gift shop on his family road trip during spring break.

Carl never got to break it open. The Wildfire started before Lori would actually let him beat a supposed “geode” with a hammer. Didn't exactly want her little boy to lose an eye.

Now looking back on it–

–Maybe her worries were valid.

“Hello? Earth to Carl?” you asked, giving a small wave over his dazed eyes with a small frown. “Why are you cryin’?”

Snapping back into reality, Carl nodded, blinking a few times, now feeling the tears that freely rolled down his freckled cheeks. “U-uh…y-yeah. Just lost in…thought.”

“...are you sure? I've been crying a lot lately too, I thought maybe somethin' might just be in the air…other than the living dead.” you shrugged, fiddling with the messily made bracelet on your wrist.

Crying definitely wasn't only it.

These bad pains in your lower tummy.

This weird…goop in your panties…? Hell if you knew what it was.

“No…no ‘m fine. Really. Just thinkin' about…everything from before.” Carl replied, gently tapping the toe of his boot against the crate.

~

You crouched, picking the small ripe strawberry with a proud smile while you stood back up. Holding the small delicate fruit between your index finger and thumb, you held it out to Carl so he could see.

“I grew it all by myself.” you boasted lightly, staring at Carl with the sweetest little grin.

The young teen couldn't help but smile at you, watching as you picked the dirt off with the pad of your thumb. Carl's eyes watched intently as you brought the strawberry up to your lips, teeth sinking into the soft flesh.

Letting out a small moan of satisfaction, you held out the other half to Carl. “It's really good!”

Carl couldn't help but smile, gently grabbing the small berry from your fingers. He tried to ignore the jump in his heart when your fingers brushed against his. Taking a small bite from the fruit, Carl couldn't help but hum at the sweet taste that bursted over his taste buds.

~

You followed Carl up the porch steps up to the house that he said he and his father were staying at. Carl pushed the front door open, holding his finger to his lips to signal you to be quiet while he softened his bootsteps.

Once inside, your eyes immediately landed on the beaten and passed out man who laid on the couch. Slowly, you turned your head to look over at Carl with a very confused and concerned look.

Carl let out an awkward small cough, gesturing his head to the flight of stairs. Without waiting for your response, Carl wrapped his finger around your wrist, pulling you towards the stairs.

You wordlessly followed him, not even caring where he took you. You'd follow him to hell and back if he asked. You were already head over heels for him.

Carl guided you to the small, almost cubby, area where the bed was nestled, under posters that adorn the walls above it. It was a boy's room. An Xbox under the TV, cases neatly stacked next to, books on the book case, a small model airplane hanging from the ceiling.

It was nice.

As you settled on the bed next to Carl, he seemed a little stiff. He had a girl in “his” room for crying out loud.

“Um, that's my dad. He's okay…I think…” Carl explained, albeit awkwardly, fingers fidgeting with the dog eared comic.

You gave a slow nod, wary, but willing to look past it.

Carl winced a little at your nod, but awkwardly nodded over to the small pile of comics, “...do you, uh, ya wanna read some with me?”

“Yeah…yeah sure.” you smiled, leaning back against the wall with him while he plucked the hat off of his head and set it to his other side.

It was comfortable. Silent while the two of you read over the respective comics you had chosen.

Until it wasn't.

“Uh…why'd you have Playboy in your treehouse?” Carl broke the silence, looking over at you.

You looked up from the comic, head cocking to the side almost like a confused puppy.

“I like lookin' at them. You know…when ‘m older, maybe I'll look like them. Y’know? Kinda like preparing myself.” you answered, before feeling your cheeks heat up with embarrassment, feeling stupid and insecure now. “Is that stupid?”

Carl quickly shook his head, setting the comic aside next to his hat. “No no. I was jus’ wonderin’ why. It's not stupid.”

It was reassuring to know that Carl didn't think you were dumb for staring at the women in the magazine and fantasizing yourself with that body.

“...cool.” you smiled, glancing back down at the comic book, fingers idly toying with the small folded corner.

~

The two of you laid next to each other, both stiff as a board while your eyes were directly at the ceiling. It was dark out now, the sun long gone, the crickets and tree frogs out.

“...g'night…” you whispered, laying on your side and turning your back to him, curling up under the thick comforter.

“Yeah. Uh, good night.” Carl mumbled, trying to ignore the flush in his pale cheeks.

He was sleeping next to a girl.

In the same bed.

In the same room.

With a girl.

This was absolutely crazy.

God. Carl never would have thought this would happen. Not after everything these past two years. This was…different. Why was his heart beating so erratically? Why did his tummy do flips when you smiled or laughed?

He only ever felt this with Beth–

Oh god.

No.

Not again.

Carl never wanted a crush ever again after Beth. He was fine being lonely. No girlfriend. No crush. But he did want a companion. And you seemed like a very smart and sweet girl.

Maybe, he could put up with this crush just to keep you around. It couldn't hurt.

Blue eyes watched your form through the blanket, the rise and fall of your chest, the way you had immediately turned back to face him when you fell asleep. The smallest little dribble of drool dripping down from your slightly parted mouth.

You were cute. Carl couldn't deny that.

Carl stared back up at the ceiling, let out a small sigh of mounting frustration at himself.

“...goddamnit Carl. Look what you did to yourself…” he quietly grumbled, closing his eyes.

It was stupid. He couldn't hide it. You were some girl he just met, and he was already crushing on you? Sure, you were adorable, smart, funny, cute–

Fuck.

Shut up.

Shut up!

Carl turned onto his right side so his back was to you, tears of embarrassment and frustration in his eyes while they rolled down towards the pillow.

He couldn't do this again. What if he lost you like he lost everyone else? What if he got you hurt? He seemed to do that with everyone he knew. Someone always got hurt or killed. It was like a fucking curse.

Dale.

Shane.

Lori.

Patrick.

Now his whole family and all of his friends?

He was cursed. He ruined everything.

Carl's small shoulders shook with suppressed sobs, tears welling in his eyes and rolling down to the pillow. He could feel the slip over his nose and down across his cheek on the pillow.

His whole body went rigid when a pair of small arms wrapped around him from behind. He could feel your breath on the back of his neck, brushing against his ear while your sleepy voice soft murmured against his skin.

“...please don't cry. ‘m sure your dad is okay…”

That made Carl cry harder, knowing that his dad might be dead downstairs on that stupid fucking couch? While he was up here having a pity party for himself?

Maybe Carl wasn't better than Rick. Maybe he was also just weak deep down.

Carl curled back into your gentle hold, hugging himself while you pressed a soft kiss to his shoulder.

“...everything will be okay…I promise…”

~

It was quiet in the bedroom, the only sounds being of birds chirping outside and the occasional small gust of wind that rustled the leaves that adorned the trees outside in the small neighborhood.

The two of you sat in the bed silently, both pairs of eyes directed at the blood stain on the front of your jeans. Your heart was pounding in panic, while Carl was concerned.

“Did somethin' happen last night? Maybe it's just walker blood from yesterday.” Carl suggested, looking up at your face that was frozen with fear.

“...maybe.” you mumbled, before freaking out when you felt a weird little gush down there.

Carl watched with confusion as you quickly stood up and unzipped your jeans, looking away when you yanked them and your panties down. You were dead silent now, eyes now on the small dribble of thick blood that leaked from your privates down to your panties around the middle of your thighs.

“...Carl, do you think ‘m dyin’?” you croaked out, looking away from the small mesmerizing string of crimson life.

Carl's eyes snapped over to you, and down to your lower half. His heart dropped a little when he saw what was happening, but he tried to rack his brain for the right term of what was happening to you.

He remembered this.

He remembered the bloodied trash back at home from his mother.

How Rick would always tell Carl to be on his best behavior during that time so Lori wouldn't stress too much.

He remembered Beth, Maggie, and Carol stressing over products during those few months they were on the road. He stared off at the wall in thought, trying to conjure with some sort of response.

Monthly.

Menstruation.

Time of the month.

Period.

Carl remembered hearing all of those, and he was pretty sure they meant the same thing, but he couldn't be so sure.

“Period. It's called a period.” Carl blurted, glancing over at you, “I-i, uh, I think. That's what my mom and dad called it. Before all of this, there was bloody trash in the bathroom trash can at home. From my mom.”

Head snapping up, you stared at him, searching his baby blues for any hint he knew what this even was, or if he just knew the name. His pale, freckled cheeks were flushed a little bit of embarrassment, fingers twiddling together.

“U-uh, it's normal…I think once girls get to a certain age, they just start…bleedin’.” Carl tried to explain, not even confident in his own explanation.

“...oh…how do I…deal with it?” you mumbled, voice soft and hesitant, tinged with pure embarrassment.

“W-well, I think there were these things my mom had in the bathroom…pads? I think that's what they were called. I don't know how they're used, but I think they catch the blood.” Carl felt way out of his element now.

He shouldn't be the one explaining how to deal with a period to you.

After you got your pants back up, you followed Carl out of the bedroom and to the bathroom upstairs in the hopes to find some sort of sanitary napkins.

You sniffled softly, holding onto his sleeve while your socked feet fell in tandem with his bare feet. The two of you made it to the bathroom, Carl digging around in the cubbies next to the toilet while you looked under the sink.

“Hey.” Carl's voice gently cut out the silence, holding the small box over to you.

Looking over, you saw the box of pads in his hands before standing back up from the crouch you dropped into. Plucking the box from his hands, you read over the box with him.

’Maxi Pads, maximum protection, minimum leakage’

With nimble fingers, you opened the box, pulling out one of the thick pads. The plastic wrapper over the napkin was a green, floral pattern, and it crinkled under your light grip.

“‘m gonna step out so you can…deal with that.” Carl awkwardly jabbed his thumb to the door, backing away and bumping into the wall.

The soft laugh you let out made his heart thump, and his cheeks flush the prettiest of pinks. Carl quickly left the bathroom, closing the door behind him and walking to the bedroom to put his socks and shoes on.

~

Walking downstairs, Carl let out a small relieved sigh when he saw that Rick wasn't dead and turned waiting for him. Slowly walking over, Carl sat on the floor, back against the couch, forehead leaned towards his father's limp, calloused hand.

He was itching for comfort from his dad, as much as he wanted to deny it. Carl wanted to be buried against his dad's chest, he wanted to feel the rough scrape of his beard against his soft cheek. He wanted his dad's comforting warmth.

“...Carl?”

The rough, and hoarseness of Rick's voice made Carl jump a little, looking over at his father whose eyes were barely open. Those familiar blues made Carl's fears slowly melt away while he hesitantly shuffled closer, resting his head against Rick's arm.

The pair jumped a little when there was a light knock on the door.

~

Padding down the stairs, still trying to get used to the thickness and unfamiliar feeling of the pad, you almost waddled a little. The skirt was now over your jeans, luckily covering the large blood stain, and your beat up sneakers now on your feet.

Your heart stopped when you saw Rick now awake sitting on the couch, while the sound of an unfamiliar woman's voice along with Carl's was in the kitchen. Terrified, you stumbled back up the stairs as quietly and quickly as you could.

You stayed hidden in the bedroom, settled on the bed while you tried to work up the courage to go back downstairs. You knew that Carl would defend you… right? You and Carl were friends now. But now he was with people he actually knew. He sounded familiar with the woman in the kitchen. What if Carl didn't want to be around you anymore?

What if you were just a substitute?

What if he didn't care?

What if–

“Hey, what's wrong? Did the pad not work? Why are you crying?” Carl's concerned voice rang out softly.

You glanced up, your teary eyes meeting his worried ones. You hadn't even noticed you were crying. Quickly wiping the tears away, you nodded, trying to dim his worries.

“Y-yeah…just…this period stuff I guess. Kinda scary knowin’ ‘m bleeding from…down there.” you lied with a soft smile, hoping it would work.

Carl seemed to buy it, or so you assumed, and nodded, “Yeah…it's probably pretty weird. But do you wanna come downstairs and meet my dad and our friend Michonne? ‘m sure they'll love you.”

You felt your heart start to pound while you gave the teen a quick nod, “Yeah. Sure.”

Carl smiled softly, watching you rub the tears away and stand up, stepping over to him. Slipping your hand into his, the two of you headed downstairs.

Before the two of you made it into the kitchen where Rick and Michonne were, Carl felt you press a soft kiss to his cheek, which made his heart do flips and his grip on your hand tighten. Letting out a small choked breath, Carl shook his head, gently tugging you to the kitchen, trying to ignore the grin pulling at his lips.

You felt nervous while the two adults stared down at you, your hand still in Carl's while the young boy tried to ignore Rick and Michonne’s knowing glance at one another.

“I-it's nice to meet you, sir.” you greeted politely, holding your free hand out to Rick, waiting for him to shake it.

Rick's icy blue stared down at your small hand that was outstretched to him, a little surprised by the politeness from you, as you seemed shy and nervous.

Rick grabbed your softer, smaller hand in his larger, rougher one, giving it a small, gentle shake. “It’s nice to meet you, sweetheart.”

After Rick's handshake, Carl seemed to relax a little. He knew that Michonne would probably be more open to letting you join than Rick ever would be.

“It's nice to meet you too, ma'am.” you smiled softly, moving your hand closer to Michonne, staring up into her brown eyes, finding that familiar maternal gaze that made you feel safe.

Michonne flashed you a small grin, giving your hand a small shake, “Likewise.”

Carl's heart finally relaxed, as did his tight grip on your hand, his thumb subconsciously rubbing your knuckles, finding comfort in each bump of your knuckles.

It was relieving, knowing that maybe you'd have even more friends– maybe even a boyfriend, but you tried not to get in over your head just yet.

Leaning closer to you, Carl let his lips hover next to your ear, “...you didn't have anythin' to worry about…”

[mahalkitamully]

oc lore ⋆˚꩜｡

( ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ ) angst

( ꩜ ) blurbs

( 𝜗𝜚⋆₊˚ ) fluff

ー

all art from my (now deactivated) art account on insta !!

luka & mela :

( ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ ) dear Luka,

[mahalkitamully]

my dear luka,

this accnt was originally for my ocs, but I never posted anything for it so here it is... i hope y'all like it, sorry for not posting </3

i'm sitting at our corner table in our cafe every friday like we always do. you've been gone for 2 months and 3 days now. where have you gone? the company says they'll declare you dead at 3 months, but i know you aren't. i write these letters because i know you'll come back and i know you'll read every last one because that's who you are. I'm writing this because I know you'll read this one day, and we'll laugh together knowing I was worried over your dumbass.

i don't want to be corny. don't let this feed your ego. but i miss you Luka. where are you? i'm growing worried and i'm distraught. you're my best friend Luka. i haven't been on an expedition since your disappearance. i miss your laugh, the way whipped cream lingers on your upper lip for a while before you notice it's there, the way you always tell me to lighten up and then push me towards the new cadets. I've been keeping to myself a lot more recently. I just miss my best friend.

roxie told me i have to let you go. to face reality and realize you're lost in the warp of time somewhere i'll never be able to reach. but i can't. i'm looking for you. i sneak into the main quarters past hours, and i look for your location. did you finally manage to break your tracker? you've always been clumsy, i don't know how, but you are.

the cafe is closing now. i've been in here every friday, hoping you'll walk in and laugh at me for waiting for you. please come back safely.

love, mela.

p.s. the cafe got new cats, they let me name one after you. the one with orange.

[mahalkitamully]

im sorry but why do smut writers say da tip was an angry red or purple..?? i've (unfortunately) seen some and they've never been red..

or is it because im thinking like

[mahalkitamully]

[mahalkitamully]

THIS IS SO PRETTY EVERYONE LIKE THEIR ART NOWWW

my edit, my arts. @marrpay

CEGAN FANS GET AWAY FROM ME.

[mahalkitamully]

only exception 𝜗𝜚⋆₊˚

ー old habits pt 2 (u don't have to read it to get this!)

: carl grimes x reader oneshot !

@cocomilaa this for u hehe

ー

carl sticking around and sneaking out with you wasn't all that bad. you didn't want to admit it but he was growing on you. his awkwardness and lame jokes were almost comforting. every night, you'd hear a clink on your window (the sign that carl was there) and together you two would sneak out over the wall.

you didn't like sneaking out at night, but it was safer when sneaking two people out instead of one. it didn't matter what you two did ー read comics, find snacks in the nearby town, or just talked with the crickets in moon light ー you two always snuck out.

tonight was no exception. you two sat on a little blanket, flashlights in hand as y'all read his comics. it was calming, the company of another person with nothing but the stars above you. the world seemed calm for once.

"how you like the comic?" carl glanced at you, his eye curious. he always started small talk with you. at first it was kinda weird, but you started to appreciate it. "it's cool, i really like it." you smiled lightly, closing the book. no matter how often y'all did this, it was never boring. “i know right! the characters are so well written and it's so fun to read- sorry-.” you noticed how he always rambled, only to cut himself off. you gently nudged him with your elbow, laughing softly. “you're fine. keep talking.” your words brought a bashful smile to his freckled cheeks.

of course, night wasn't always calm. your ears perked up at the sound of a twig snapping and the two of you stood up immediately. one walker, then two then three pulled up, and you two booked it. you taught carl how to be quieter and y'all managed to sneak into a hollowed tree before they could catch up.

it was kind of cramped, the stench of rotting wood and moss filling the small space. your eyes were locked outside, but carl's were locked on you. the way your eyes glistened in the moonlight, the way your lips parted as you caught your breath, the hair messily hanging by your head from running. everything seemed so alluring to him in the moment.

his hands started to sweat, his eyes wandering from your hair to your eyes to your cheeks. why was he so affected? he'd been around girls his age before ー well, just enid ー but still a girl his age. so why were you making him so self conscious? he wanted to impress you. he wanted to see your eyes tear up from how hard he'd make you laugh, to wake up and see your face. he wanted to know if you snored, all the little things that you'd do when you're lost in thought. he wanted to know everything about you. he felt stupid and cliche, almost scolding himself for being so silly. but he couldn't help it. he wanted to always be by your side. 

before he knew it, his hand reached out and tucked your hair behind your ear. his touch was gentle, like you'd break if he was any more direct. you snap your head to him, both of you red and embarrassed. "sorry i- just- it-.." he tried to make an excuse, but to no avail. his country accent always slipped ever so slightly whenever he was nervous. you rolled your eyes at his lame attempts before cutting him off softly. "c'mon.. let's go."

the two of you giggled and laughed as you snuck over the wall. tonight was eventful and the two of you couldn't help but find it ridiculous. it wasn't till you heard carl stop laughing when you turned your attention to him. "what's wrong?" you followed his gaze, before seeing rick and michonne's. both their eyes locked on the two of you. "what the hell are you two doing?"

CORY KENSHINS BACK FR AHAHA also i'm on s9 now of twd i'm scared

also sorry this is kinda bad writers block sucks

[mahalkitamully]

no title yet 𝜗𝜚⋆₊˚

: carl grimes x reader short oneshot !

includes : haters to lovers (somewhat), grumpy char x sunshine reader, very very very short srry

ー

you and him always clashed. maybe it was because he never learned how to be a kid, whereas you were always so carefree. maybe that was the reason he avoided you, always staring but never speaking. though in the case of an emergency, you were the first one he thought of. he'd never tell you that of course.

it wasn't until the fall of alexandria, walkers everywhere you looked, the faces of those you knew dead on the ground, their skin gnawed off by desperate creatures trying to eat. at that point you had seen more insides than faces. it wasn't until that day, carl realized you could die whenever. your obnoxiously naive behavior, the blinding glow of your warmth and kindness, gone in a breath. he knew he had to tell you. even though he dreaded it.

it's hard to say why he hated you. maybe he was scared of how you were growing on him, or how much love he realized he had for you. but when he told you everything, he didn't even have to speak. by the way he held you tightly against him, hand cupping your cheek with such gentleness before kissing you with desperation, it told you everything he wanted to say.

he needed you. your glow, your radiance, your rose tinted view of everything. he hated how you made him feel.

just a little rant sigh like imagine someone (in gen) holding you so tightly and kissing you as if they knew it was the last time when you know it was the first like cmon now kiss me like ure afraid you never will again

tags : @cocomilaa luv u

[mahalkitamully]

old habits 𝜗𝜚⋆₊˚

: carl grimes x reader oneshot !

it's 3 in the morning this is so like out my ass

ー

being safe inside alexandria was a dream come true. a roof over your head, clean hot water, food and people you can rely on? well- some but you get it. alexandria was heaven on earth for you, especially after being out so long.

but old habits die hard or whatever the fuck they say, because night after night, you've been sneaking out over the wall to kill walkers. it was pure self indulgenceー maybe to get your anger out or just to feel the high of adrenalineー you don't know, but you do know that it felt good. really good.

it became a routine, waiting till everyone was out of the streets and then climbing over the metal walls and never coming back till 5. you had your own place, no one would've known. or so you thought.

you heard it. you know you did. someone was following you. you turned around- nothing. maybe staying up killing walkers was a bad idea after all. then it took another step and you were fed up.

"i know you're out there, come out." you called out, lying out of your ass. you didn't really know. not until he came out from behind a tree. the boy from the new group that came in a few weeks ago. what was his name? he had that silly sheriff's hat that he never took off, a light blue flannel that matched his eyes, and a gun tucked in its holster.

"why're you here?" you gripped the knife in your hand, eyeing him down as if he were going to disappear if you looked away.

"you shouldn't be out here so late y'know, it's dangerous." his voice was low, almost awkward. the type of voice people use when they want to talk, but lack the social skills to keep a conversation.

"why'd you follow me?" you wouldn't have minded, if it wasn't night, and he was just creeping behind you. "i saw you climbing over the wall." he finally responded, his demeanor a little guilty.

"what're you even doing out here?"

"what we've always done?" you continued to walk to find walkers like you were planning originally. and like he was doing originally, he followed.

why're you so mysterious ok baddie i need to sleep also @cocomilaa hi cami bb mwah

[mahalkitamully]

when i gotta make a new theme but i feel like my old wattpad theme shop from 2020

[mahalkitamully]

⠀。i've always wanted to die clean and pretty ಿৎ

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀૮ ․ ․ ⠀ა 𖦹 you can call me mully !! .⋆♱ i'm not online often . .

let's be kind on my page, everyone deserves love ₍⑅ᐢ..ᐢ₎

⠀⠀pinoy !! she / her ୨ৎ i luv . . : twd, tlou, RE, sally face, etc 。

₊ ⊹ ﹒⌗ minor / ageless blog friendly ! ⸝⸝ ( just don't be weird )

( masterlist ) ₊ ⊹ i do write smut rarely, minors pls do not interact then

this page is just for fun ! ! ⠀expect mediocre writing ˚˖𓍢 ꒱ ( banner )

[mahalkitamully]

the girl next door 𝜗𝜚⋆₊˚

一 theater date (p4)

MEN GO AWAY BOOOO LADIES ILYSM

: neighbor ! modern ! ellie williams x reader oneshot !

fluff fluff :3

read the other chapters here !

also im suffering from writers block so this is a little shitty

一

you waited outside the theater, on your phone. you'd been waiting a couple minutes now, your mind running. she had texted you saying something came up a while ago. you had to drive yourself and everything. was she messing with you? was it the weed talking back then? with your head a whirl of thoughts, you didn't even acknowledge someone tapping your shoulder or the familiar smell of her.

you look up and there she was. it almost made you feel silly for doubting her. "sorry.. my teacher was up my ass." she joked, rubbing the back of her neck as she always did. "you look cute" and with that you were cheesing hard.

she held the door open for you, following behind shortly after. as the two of you stood in line, there were your typical families with their loud ass kids, the couple that couldn't wait till they were in a dark theater to touch each other, and a group of teens hanging out.

ellie shoved her thumbs in her belt loops, keeping close to you. "so.. you like scary movies?" she tilted her head as you nodded. "yeah i love them!!"

. . .

'what the FUCK was i thinking?!' was all you could think to yourself as you squirmed awkwardly in your seat. this new movie was cool, gory, filled with action and suspense ー everything Ellie loved 一 had you freaked out. you didn't mind scary movies, but it got to a point.

a particular scene where the guy turned the corner, only for the camera to jump scare the audience had you reach for Ellie's arm, spilling popcorn slightly. she eyed you before leaning to your ear.

"too scary for you? we can leave if you want-"

''no it's fine-! that'd be a waste of money." you smiled, your hands sweaty. she sighed before gently intertwining her fingers with yours.

her palm was soft, but calloused in some places. her nails were well trimmed and her touch felt like it burned. embarrassing as it was to be scared at a movie you said you'd enjoy, holding her hand made the humiliation sting a little less.

. . .

"that ending was so shit."

"yeah i'm saying-!"

as the two of you walked, hands intertwined, time seemed to speed up. she was glowing, the only thing in the room to you. no matter what she did, it had a warmth to it that no one else could emit. she was like the sun to you.

"...lo? hello? you there?" her voice spoke softly, her head tilted as she snapped you out of your trance. she was so captivating.

"huh-? yeah, i- sorry- I uh- what'd you say?

"I was just- what- just- fuck- just wondering if you wanted to go to my place next time-?"

you smiled, nodding before you could think. the drive back was nice, the music on the radio creating a romantic mood.

. . .

she waited as you unlocked your door, smiling softly as you turned around. "see you tomorrow?" she leaned her shoulder against the door frame, avoiding your gaze every now and then. you nodded, gently moving her hair out the way. your fingertips stayed pressed against her cheek for a second before snapping back to your side. "mhm- g'night-!" you stammered out, closing the door.

both of you fell asleep with a red face and smiles that night.

[mahalkitamully]

ellie williams x fem reader coming soon in honor of pride month promise

[mahalkitamully]

100 FOLLOWERS??

[mahalkitamully]

tutor sesh ࣪𖤐.ᐟ

: nerd ! armin arlert x fem ! reader oneshot !

CONTENT WARNING : very freaky guys..

INCLUDES : slightly sub to dom armin, kinda pervy reader ?? slight degradation, use of mama, mommy etc, hickies, fingering, no p in v

he's not a high schooler in this guys!!! i just used the fanart as its trending rn, but you're both college students!!

ー

"what's the- the answer to this one-..?" armin stammered out, his face burning as he tried to ignore your hand on his thigh. you two had a bet- a way to make things interesting during tutor sessions. you two could touch whenever and wherever, but whoever came first before learning the topic lost and had to do what the other person wanted. armin wanted a new fuckass anime figurine. he didn't want to lose (again). was it dirty and almost unhinged? kinda. did y'all care? nope!

"I don't know, what is it min?" you tilted your head, your hand brushing further up teasingly. armin let out a shaky sigh, his grip on the pencil tightening as your hand played with the zipper of his jeans. his breath trembled, as you smiled. "well- to- to make- get the answer u- uhm- what-?" he stuttered and fumbled over his words, his eyes widening as he felt you unzip his jeans.

"to get the answer?" you repeated, your hand ghosting over his now throbbing boner. he tried to speak, but it came out in an incoherent ramble. suddenly, he grabbed your wrist, pulling it down past his boxers and to his leaking tip. he sighed, his eyes shutting as he stroked himself with your hand.

"so what's the answer?" you spoke again, knowing he wouldn't be able to speak. he was too lost in his lust drunk mind to realize you were asking something. "sh- shut- up." he whimpered out, before you sped up your hand, your brows furrowed. "don't talk to me like that.. or you might just lose our bet."

he grabbed your wrist once again, pulling it off before tugging his jeans down slightly, his cock now out and leaking. it was kind of cute really- seeing him so desperate he was doing things himself. he looked at you, his eyes half lidded and teary before leaning down, dragging his tongue against the crook of your neck. the metal of his tongue piercing tickled your skin, leaving goosebumps.

you find your way between his legs, your hand on his thigh. your hot breath grazed his leaking tip, his own breath shaking. without warning you pushed your head onto his cock lightly, his hand gripping your hair.

he let out a high moan, his eyes shutting before looking down at you. you gently bobbed your head, his head throwing back as he whimpered strings of 'fuck' and 'mama'. "d- doing so good for me mommy.. so- such a f- fucking good slut mama.." he moaned, your name leaving his lips like a chant.

he felt his orgasm coming soon, his grip on your hair tightening as he thrusted up into your mouth. his tongue lolled out as his glasses fogged, his words an incoherent babble. "fuck! mama i'm- shit...-!" he shoved your head off before panting, saving himself from cumming. "I.. I'm not losing this bet.." he breathed out, before gently grabbing your wrists, leading you to the bed. he leaned you back, propping your legs on his shoulders as he moved his mouth down to your inner thighs.

his hot breath sent shivers up your spine, his tongue licking upwards to your shorts. with your permission he tugged them off, his lips parting as he saw how drenched you were. he let out a sigh before moving it to the side, a finger circling your slit as he planted kisses on your lower stomach.

"so pretty mommy.. 'ma make you cum mama.." he whispered against your skin, your breath heavy. as he slipped a finger in, he kissed your inner thigh softly. you could feel his smirk as you moaned, his eyes locking up to your face. "taking it so well.. what a dirty mama.. I'm sure you could handle one more finger..." he dragged his voice teasingly, pushing a second finger inside as you let out a shaky moan of his name.

his other hand fiddled with the hem of your shirt, lifting it up over your chest. he leaned down and sucked on your hardened buds, his teeth grazing it oh so skillfully. it hurt- but it added onto all the pleasure he was giving you. he left hickies between your tits, almost marking you with these purple bruises.

he pumped his fingers relentlessly, curling them upwards to your g-spot. as much as you wanted to win this bet, the only thing on your mind was armin and his fingers fucking you senseless. your words were now babbles like his were before, tears streaming down your face as you cried from pleasure. his thumb circled your clit, drawing figure 8's as he slipped a third finger inside.

with that, your back arched, squirt and cum soaking the bed beneath you as you shook and convulsed in his hand. he smiled with pride, his eyes locked on your panting face. tears and drool shimmered on your face, hair sticking to your sweat drenched skin. he kissed your neck, pulling his fingers out slowly before speaking.

"guess I won"

i got too embarrassed to proofread sorry </3

[mahalkitamully]

i need help please </3