need2bthin4himx - Tumblr blog

[need2bthin4himx]

HUGE TMI WARNING!!!!! and ed discussion tw

im warning you it's really disgusting

yall be careful with laxatives im shitting out whole chunks of completely undigested food, this feeling is awful my stomach is churning. ofc im used to it by now but omg. just PLEASE be careful ik im a hypocrite but theyre so bad for you and dangerous aswell. i only did this because i binged to bad it was causing me intense physical pain and mental distress. i took about 20 tablets, the recommended is 1-3. SERIOUSLY, do not do this.

[need2bthin4himx]

OMGGG!! okay so recently it's been a bunch of ups n downs w my weight, and my guy friend invited me over to swim at his house with our two friends (girls, who both have the PERFECT bodies). I fasted the whole day before and most of today (approx 36 hrs) but I was still kinda bloated n fat because of binges a few days ago. So obviously I was so nervous showing up in my bikini, but it was so fun!

But the BEST PART was that he was saying he could pick all of us up, and I ofc said "not me" (not in a pick-me way, I just was joking) BUT HE LITERALLY SWEPT ME OFF MY FEET?? And then we were playing chicken and I sat on his shoulders, he said I was light and I asked how much he thought I weighed and he said 98 POUNDS!!!! MY GW!!! I weigh at least 112 pounds, so I couldn't believe it! And our two other friends both looked so good and so skinny in their bikinis but I felt so happy that I didn't even feel self conscious that much!

I'm so motivated to lose more now, I feel so ready!!

[need2bthin4himx]

i cannot wait for summer, i know without school ill be less stressed which means less binges! also, i can get much more exercise in the warm weather. i can walk, swim, bike, even go on runs or more! and ill be able to stay away from food almost entirely. last summer was the best time for me losing weight, i cant wait to do it again!

do you guys prefer the cold or hot seasons for losing weight? personally, winter always makes me gain, but everyone is different!

you got this lovelies <333

[need2bthin4himx]

my motivations to lose weight!!

so i wont compare myself as much to others

so i will be able to always fit cute, small clothes

so i wont worry about my stomach

so people will like me more

so if a boy ever likes me ill be small and dainty for him

so people will be amazed at how small i am

so people wont even believe i can weigh so little

looking cute and thin in pretty dresses!!

summer/warm weather!!

so i can learn to love myself

so i can feel happy

so i will look effortlessly good because of how small i will be

so i can be guys' crushes

so people will admire me

so people will talk to me more

so people will worry about me

so i can be small and fragile

so people might be jealous

revenge on the guy who played w me (bonus!)

and also..

so i can workout without hating it

so i can be less hungry

so i will have more self-control

so i will be more active

so i will look good in photos and videos

I am determined to do this, even if I fail one day, I will get on track the next.

[need2bthin4himx]

//tw// to drag shining silver across pale flesh,

to watch bright red drops bead and flow,

to carve out imperfections,

to see inside my skin.

to be the art,

and the artist who creates it.

to be broken and raw and exposed.

this is what i want.

to be something people don't dare to look at,

but cannot look away from.

to be the whisper from a stranger.

to be a casualty of my own existence,

the result of emotions un-explainable.

[need2bthin4himx]

when every guy ive liked has actually told me i need to eat more but this is all i think

maybe if i was skinnier he would want me

[need2bthin4himx]

my fav things to watch while fasting/when hungry!!

-mukbangers

-supersize vs superskinny

-my 600 lb life

-erik the electric calorie challenges!!

-americas next top model

-documentaries

-to the bone!!

-girl, interrupted!

leave any suggestions, theyre very appreciated! <3

bonus points if you can chew gum and have a low-cal drink or a vape!

[need2bthin4himx]

"2023 is gonna be a good year for me!!"

4-5 days later: dad found out i s/h, i cried in front of the whole class, my therapist is angry with me for lying, i'm hiding in my room, skipped school, behind in classes, phone taken (on my old laptop), probably scared my crush away, ppl are talking about me at school

but im not eating as much and looking skinnier soooo maybe i was right! live laugh love monster/zero sugar dr pepper and nicotine <3