pandathemonium

[pandathemonium]

What do Russian rulers say when they apologize?

I’m tsar-y 

[pandathemonium]

What did the squid say before it left?

I gotta squidaddle

[pandathemonium]

What's the profession that corn has?

A cob-bler

[pandathemonium]

Why are cows so good with acownting? They handle the moo-lah

[pandathemonium]

what do you call the basics of bread making? Fun-dough-mentals

[pandathemonium]

Where do horses go for indoor PE? The gym-neigh-sium

[pandathemonium]

What extracurriculars do cows do? A-cow-pella

(other options: Cross cow-ntry racing, multi cowtural club)

[pandathemonium]

what do you say when people get an earthquake due to fracking? Well it’s not your fault

[pandathemonium]

pulling this out bc HAPPY PRIDE YALL

if you’re bi and have a preference for a gender, are you bi-ased?

and further,

If you’re biromantic asexual and you have a preference for a gender, are you bi-aced?

(many thanks to my friend for the additional bit)

[pandathemonium]

why shouldn't you trust fish?

they're superst-fish-ous

[pandathemonium]

which candies go to school?

smarties and dum-dums

[pandathemonium]

what are ghosts' favorite type of footwear?

boo-ts

[pandathemonium]

Pumpkin soup during Autumn is soup-erior

[pandathemonium]

soup is soup-er good

[pandathemonium]

photo of a person on a porch = porch-rait

[pandathemonium]

gopher it

(curtesy of my bio class wall)

[pandathemonium]

tea shops tea-ch their new employees about tea