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milkpup · 9 months

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｡⋆ʚ♡ bad luck comes in threes (and in me)

›› nsfw 18+ / 3 part fic

@ace_343 on twt

ch 2 ♡ ch 3

ʚ ao3 ɞ / ʚ kofi ɞ / ʚ fic masterlist ɞ

›› naoya zenin x f!reader ›› megumi fushiguro x f!reader ›› toji fushiguro x f!eader ›› naoya x f!reader x megumi / megumi x f!reader x toji ›› naoya x f!reader x megumi + toji ›› started: 1/12/24 : status: ongoing

‹𝟹 summary: You and Megumi are close friends. He invites you to his family's estate where you start to notice how bad your luck really is.

‹𝟹 fandom: jjk, jujutsu kaisen

‹𝟹 genres / warnings: au - no powers, college au, pseudo-incest (they all want y/n, not eachother), harsh language, abuse, power imbalance, dubious consent / rxpe / noncon

‹𝟹 tags: AGED UP CHARACTERS!, au - no deaths, au - toji and megumi are part of zenin clan still, power imblance, degradation, choking, loss of virginity, name calling, pet names, some fluff and LOTS OF SMUT, slight angst, all the zenins want you basically, vaginal, blow jobs, cunnilingus, face sitting, 4some, mdom, fsub, pseudo-incest, meet the family, breeding, cum as lube, cum swapping, light blood, aggressive choking, will update tags as more is added, praise, being called a good girl

‹𝟹 notes: this is a long time in the making. i probably started this fic over a month ago >< i've been working on it more than my lfls fic that i like more. just smthn abt naoya...... (usually i prefer naoya to be subby but this fic is diff oopsies :3!). lmk what y'all think.i'll be updating my other fic real soon but for now, crumbs of this i guess LOL. i was originally going to do a oneshot but it was already starting to get long and i hadn't even progressed much in the plot i have written up x-x so i figured i'd do 3 chaps since it's like the theme >:3 hope y'all like it!!!

i'll be updating tags as it progresses. i'm super excited abt this fic even tho it's like 99% smut. (idk how to write stuff w/o smut oops) what can i say??? 🤌

!! - again, PLEASE READ TAGS BEFORE CONTINUING - !!

! - ALL CHARACTERS ARE 18+ - !

Chapter 1: Exposed

“So, do you think you can make it?” Megumi asks, taking a sip of his coffee and looking at you inquisitively. “To my family event, the reunion thing, I mean.”

You hadn’t thought about it much. Sipping on your tea, you contemplated. You’ve never met Megumi’s extended family; you had no idea what they would be like. Megumi’s family is huge, and it would be a multi-day event held at their estate. “Oh, what the hell. I have nothing better to do during winter break anyways.”

His face lights up a bit at your confirmation, but Megumi tries his hardest to hide it. You can see the blush creeping across his nose, his cheeks, even reaching the tips of his ears. He was like a little puppy, excited to see you.

“Make sure to bring any nice clothes you want to wear, but there will be pajamas and toiletries provided to you.” He finished his drink and moved to throw his away. “Are you done too?”

You felt bad, you had a little bit of your tea left and he was patiently waiting for you to finish to throw your trash away for you. You hurriedly suck up the remainder of the tea through the straw, and hand him the empty cup. “Thanks, Megs.” You chirp.

Megumi blushes and looks away as he takes your cup from your hands.

You’re back at your house, frantically packing last minute before Megumi comes over to pick you up. You’ve always been an overpacker, and you have no idea what to expect. You throw all sorts of garments into a pile that you want to take: casual clothes like leggings and hoodies, dresses and formalwear, and intimates. You blush, picking up matching sets of underwear and bras. You decide to toss them onto the pile anyways, better prepared than not. You didn’t know who you were “preparing” for, but felt your cheeks flush anyways. I’m meeting my close friend’s extended party and I’m packing lingerie, am I a fucking creep? You shake your head, trying to shake the thoughts out too.

You finish stuffing your clothes into your bags, packing some makeup and skincare that they probably wouldn’t have available. Just as you finish zipping your second bag, you hear a loud knock on the front door. It’s Megumi.

You open the door with a soft smile, greeting Megumi. “Thanks for picking me up Megs! Can you help me with my other bag?”

He looks down to where you’re gesturing, noticing the other bag. “Jeez ____, it’s a 3 day party. How many clothes do you need?”

You blush, sheepishly. “I just want to be prepared… y’know?” Megumi huffs and groans before picking up both bags. A lady should never have to carry her own bags, and he noticed it seemed like you were struggling with how heavy these bags were, being packed to the absolute brim.

“T-thanks, Megs.” You croak out as you follow behind him to his car. He doesn’t reply, hoisting your bags in the trunk before slamming it shut. You open the door and sit in the passenger side, buckling your seatbelt with an audible click. He gets in shortly after you, adjusting his seatbelt and turning the car on.

The silence is thick, but not awkward. You and Megumi were comfortable around each other, not requiring a word to be said as you sat in comfortable silence on the drive to his family’s estate. Your curiosity got the better of you, and you ask Megumi, breaking the silence, “So what are the plans for the event? How big is it going to be, anyways?”

Megumi answers you, not taking his eyes off the road. “It will have pretty much my entire family, extended family, and family friends. There’s lots to do at our estate, from the gardens, movie room, bar room, and more. As for planned events, music and lots of food, maybe dancing?” His tone ends questioningly, he knows his family isn’t particularly fond of frivolous activities like dancing, but there might still be some as more people loosen up.

You nod, taking in his answer. This sounds almost a little exciting. Much better than spending time holed up in your room, studying or watching youtube.

Megumi pulled up to the grandiose estate. “Wow Gumi, I knew your family was loaded…. But not THIS loaded,” You gasped in awe. The entire property was large enough to be a mini village. You were shocked, to say the least. The beautiful landscaping, trees, the koi pond that connected into a river surrounding the main building… it was all too beautiful.

“Yeah, they are wealthy on a whole different level,” he responds, as he pops the trunk and retrieves your bags. “Usually they have servants around, but I’ll show you around the estate myself instead.” He starts walking towards the front entrance, you follow him closely behind, not wanting to get lost.

Megumi doesn’t even have to open the door, servants inside let him in as soon as he approaches. He briskly walks along the pavilion, turning left towards a long corridor. You try to match pace, but his long legs gives him an advantage. You take this moment, a few paces behind Megumi, to admire his raven locks bouncing as he walked.

As you’re walking, you pass an entryway, seeing a few figures to your right. Someone clicks their tongue. “I see my cousin Megumi understands,” he starts, eyes following your figure as you walk past him, “that a woman’s place is three steps behind a man’s.” This mysterious man, related to Megumi, smirks as your figure disappears.

“Don’t listen to him. He’s so full of shit it’s festering,” Megumi spits out. He seems to really hate whoever that guy was. Megumi leads you to a room down a quiet corridor and opens the door. “This will be your room for the next few nights,” He announces as he enters the room and sets your bags down. “My room is on the other side of the estate. These are the guest rooms. We can check mine out later, if you’re interested.” He flushes at that last part, looking down and uncomfortably shifting his weight. “Anyways, I have to clean up before dinner in an hour. I’ll be back to see you soon.’

Megumi retreats from your room and closes the door behind him. You decide to unpack, putting things in the drawers and hanging some items in the closet. The room was quite spacious, with its own bathroom attached and adjacent to this room.

You haven’t finished unpacking yet but decided to take a quick shower just to freshen up. You scope out the bathroom and quickly shut the door behind you. Turning the shower on to a scalding hot temp, you wait for it to heat up as steam fills the bathroom. You strip and enter the shower.

He stalks the hallway you were walking through but a moment ago. He’s insanely curious as to what you look like up close, intrigued by your fleeting form as you walked by behind Megumi. He wondered if you were his toy, you following Megumi like a puppy definitely gave off that message.

He can still smell a lingering scent of citrus and flowers. He knows it’s you, because women of the clan are usually not permitted to walk this side of the estate anyways. He’s following your trail, like a predator following its prey. He sees the faint glow of light coming from the crack of a door and approaches it.

He knocks once. No response. He knocks twice. Still nothing. Naoya Zenin believed he was a gentleman, but he had his limits. This was his future estate, he believed he had every right to know every single thing going on under this roof.

He lets himself in, and immediately sees the cracked bathroom door, a bit of steam escaping. He hears you humming while taking a shower, and smirks. He silently closes the door, and makes his way towards your plush bed. He sees a bag open, clothes strewn about. Something frilly and lacy catches his eye, and he walks towards the table instead. He picks the article of clothing up, noticing he was holding a black thong, laces and bows, adorned with gems along the thin waistband. He licked his lips, unholy thoughts flooding his brain.

He hears you shut off the shower, and quickly pockets the garment, swiftly moving to sit on the edge of the bed. A few moments pass, and the door of the bathroom swings open. Steam floods your room, quickly dissipating. You have a towel wrapped around your body, still humming as you walk towards your pile of clothes. You had set a specific set on top to put on after your shower. You could have sworn the thong was there, but as you rummaged through your bag the garment was nowhere to be seen.

“Looking for these, little miss?” You gasp and turn around to see a man sitting on your bed, holding up your thong with 1 finger, while smirking and eyeing you down. You nearly drop your towel, but regain composure.

“Who are you?” You ask, unsure of why a strange man you’ve never seen before let himself into your room.

“My apologies, doll, I didn’t mean to scare you. My name is Naoya Zenin. I’m set to be the next heir of the clan and estate,” he smirks, “And I figured I should personally introduce myself to you. It would be impolite of me not to do so. Who are you?”

“I’m _____, Megumi’s friend. He invited me over to meet all his family.” His ears perked up at you mentioning your friendship with Megumi, a devious thought crossing. You were still in your towel, cold air further cooling your already wet skin.

“You didn’t answer my first question, little miss. Were you planning on wearing these?” He practically spins the panties around his finger, staring you down intently. “I didn’t think such a good girl would bring something like this to wear when meeting her friend’s family…” He trails off.

A blushes creeps along your face, you didn’t think someone would know. You didn’t think someone would barge into your room, look through your clothes, and tease you about it. You couldn’t even look Naoya in the eye, shame clearly on display on your features.

“Don’t worry, woman, I won’t tell anyone. You wouldn’t want your close friend, Megumi, to know about this right? I won’t tell; however, my silence has a price.” He finishes his comment, smirking at you. His sultry gaze was locked on you, scanning your body from head to toe. He grinned and licked his lips, thinking about how he could manipulate you.

“What do you mean?” You look up at him, confused and unsure about the situation. “What do I have to do?” At that question, Naoya lifts himself from your bed to make his way towards you. His gaze never once leaving yours, making intense eye contact that sent shivers down your spine and left you trembling. You felt like prey being stalked by a predator.

Naoya is right in front of you now, as he grabs both wrists with his hands and lifts them above your head. You’re startled but have no time to react as he pushes you against a wall, wrists pinned above you. You can feel Naoya’s hot breath tickling your cheek, making you lose all sense of rationality. He grins at you, looking down as he has you in a position you can’t easily free yourself from. Your head hangs low, looking down, trying to stifle your heavy breathing. You don’t want him to know his actions are affecting you.

“I know women are dumb, but seriously, how can you not know what I mean? At least you’re pretty….” He leaves his sentence unfinished, bringing a cold hand to your chin and tilting your head to look at him. “Little miss, I’ll explain it to you once, in an easy way to understand. I want to use you. Your body, specifically. Will you be a good girl and let me? Or do you want me to make you.” Naoya’s tone drops a bit, almost grunting at the end. Thoughts about what “using you” entails floods your mind. You’re inexperienced, but not entirely clueless. Your blush deepens as you look into his eyes, now peering down at you.

You didn’t think being degraded and praised in the span of a few seconds would entice you as much as it would. Normally you’re a very independent woman, fully capable of realizing your own dreams and pursuing your own goals. But something… something about being put down but also called a good girl sent you driving up the wall with insanity. You were hooked near instantly.

“Yes sir,” you meekly respond, looking up at Naoya. Your emotions and lust are on clear display for him, and he’s enjoying every second of it.

“Good girl.” He smirks. “Just to be clear, I have very specific tastes and like to be pleased in a certain way. Try and make me proud, you dumb whore.” Your cheeks flared red at the insult. “Open your mouth, cunt.”

You made no hesitation to fulfill his command. He still had a firm grip on your chin, leaning down as he spit into your mouth. “Swallow, princess.” He instructs as he pushes your mouth closed. You comply, feeling more heat pooling between your legs. “Good girl,” he purrs as you open your mouth to show him.

He leans back into you, lips crashing into yours. He nips at your bottom lip, drawing a tiny bit of blood as he goes back to kissing you. He can taste the blood mixed with both of your saliva as he forces his tongue into your mouth, trying to push his way into every part of you he can. His hand previously at your chin is moving down toward your neck, resting into a firm grip across your neck. You can still breathe, but the firm pressure while he’s sloppily kissing you elicits a few soft moans from you into his mouth. You can’t tell, but he’s grinning as his grip increases a bit. He pulls away before taunting you, “Do you like that? Huh? Are you a masochist or something?” He’s not relenting, grip strengthening as you’re looking up at him, tears beginning to form in your eyes.

You’re unable to speak, so you try to nod your head to show him that he’s right. He notices and loosens his grip before moving his hand towards your chest. “Good girl,” he praises you. “I like that.” He leaves kisses in a trail from your lips to your neck, kissing over the faint marks his hands left before. You’re still against the wall, hands above your head, and he released his other grip before picking you up and carrying you to your bed.

“Next time, I want to see you wear that slutty fucking lingerie you brought. You’re such a dirty girl.” He peers down at you as you’re left exposed on your bed. He’s crawling above you, pushing you into the mattress. He gives you a few impatient kisses before moving back to your chest, grabbing one of your breasts while his mouth moves to the other. His other hand is fervently roamed your body, moving down your tummy towards your hips and eventually resting on your thigh. His hands were soft but rough trailing along your skin, as if he was searching for something.

Naoya’s hand slips to your inner thigh, just shy of your exposed cunt. He lightly grips it as he starts leaving a trail of kisses down your body as he took his hand from your breast and pushed your thighs apart. He left love bites and marks as he made his way to your cunt, stopping to look up at you. He grinned as he spit on one of his fingers, prodding its way through your folds to find your clit. He’s been with many women, and although he has an arrogant attitude, he does know exactly how to please a woman.

He rubs circles around your clit as his mouth leaves a little bite mark against your inner thigh. You softly moan at the pain as Naoya’s eyes flick up to meet yours. Although you can’t see it, you’re sure he has that asshole smirk of his. Your suspicions are pretty much confirmed when he says “Are you some masochist? Some dumb bitch who likes to be hurt. For real?” You think you heard a laugh as he moved his finger down to your hole, spitting some more before he fucked you with a finger. You didn’t need any more lube, you were practically drenched. He pushed his finger in, feeling how tight your hole was with only one of his fingers.

“You have the tightest cunt I’ve ever felt. I’m impressed. Are you a virgin too?” He looked up at you, expecting an answer.

“Yeah..” You tried to hide your face with your hands, embarrassed at your lack of experience. Naoya saw it differently though. His cock twitched in his pants as you replied, and he started moving his finger inside your tight cunt. He loved hearing the little moans you make as he slipped his finger in and out, a lewd wet sound filling the room. He was trying to get you used to it, but he was getting impatient. He was already working harder for any woman he’s ever been with.

His mouth moved above your clit, tongue flicking around the sensitive bud as he slipped in another long finger into your hole. He curled and scissored his fingers, trying to stretch you as his fingers fucked you faster. Your face was flush with embarrassment as you still tried to contain some of your moans. One more finger slipped in, stretching your walls while he moved above you, face aligned with yours.

He kept fingering your cunt as he aggressively kissed you, biting your lip before he shoved his tongue into your mouth. You could feel yourself come closer to the edge, your core tightening. You were moaning into his mouth, arms wrapped around his neck pulling his body closer into yours.

“Fuck... Naoya…” you whined out as you felt the thread about to snap, “I’m gonna—cum!!” His fingers slammed into your cunt as he was leaving marks along your neck. You felt your walls tighten around his fingers as he expertly prepped your cunt for the main event.

“You’re such a good girl… I almost feel bad taking your virginity. Almost.” Naoya takes out his fingers, sucking on a few of them to taste you. He pushes one of his fingers into your mouth, commanding you to taste your own cunt. “Next time I’ll taste you myself… but I can’t wait any longer,” he says as he’s taking off his shirt and pants, pulling down his briefs to expose his large cock. He moves up above you again, grabbing your legs by the ankle as his body is pushed against yours. He’s putting you in a mating press. He moves the tip to your entrance and spits on his cock before slowly pushing inside, feeling your tight walls around his girthy cock.

He gives you time to adjust, but it isn’t nearly enough. Naoya has been kind enough, but he always takes what he wants. Still, he will be nice one last time. “I’m gonna fuck you how I want to now, okay whore? You’re gonna be a good girl and take it anyways, right?” He gives you no time to prepare as he slams into you, bottoming out, forcibly deflowering you. The pain hurts, but Naoya is relentless. He pulls out and briefly gives you a moment of respite before slamming his cock back into your cunt. Despite the pain, the feeling is like never before as his body is pushed against yours, cock ramming in and out of your hole. Your cute moans are like music to his ears.

He leans down towards your face, seeming like he’s going to kiss you but instead spits on you. He moves a hand to grasp around your throat as you’re looking up at, unable to make any sound as his cock abuses your hole. The pressure and lack of air make your head feel dizzy as he spits again, degrading you. “You like that too, huh, stupid slut.” He hips pick up speed, pulling out before repeatedly bottoming out into your cunt. He lets go of your neck, allowing you to gasp for air. He would never admit it, but the sound of you struggling to breathe drives him insane.

He spits on his hand and moves it to your clit, fervently rubbing your bud, bringing you closer to your second orgasm of the night. You feel the waves of pleasure overwhelm your body as he’s raw dogging your cunt and relentlessly abusing your clit. Your moans are laced with pleasure, dripping with your ecstasy as you cum over Naoya’s cock, tightening your walls around him.

Naoya mercilessly fucks your virgin hole like he deserves it, like it’s owed to him. Whatever he wants, he gets. He’s grunting as moaning as he picks up speed, fucking you like an animal. “Hey bitch, ah fuck—I’m gonna cum in you. You’re gonna take it like a good girl alright?” He lightly slaps your face as he’s finishing his sentence, bottoming out for the last time before he slams back inside your cunt and paints your insides white. You can feel the warmth of his seed filling you; there’s so much of it that it leaks out, a lewd sight before Naoya as he looks down at where you’re both connected. Before he can pull out and clean himself, the door to the guest room slightly creaked open as if it had been left ajar, not fully closed. Naoya cursed himself for not closing and locking the door.

Megumi had been standing there for not even 5 minutes when he went to check on you and bring you to dinner. He was approaching your room when he heard faint moaning coming from your room. He was confused and curious, stopping in front of your door as he noticed it was left slightly open. What he saw left him shocked and speechless, unable to move or avert his gaze through the crack.

He heard you more than he could see you clearly, but your moans that are more beautiful than a symphony of angels was more than enough to make Megumi’s cock strain in his pants. He peered closer, unable to see who was fucking you but still able to see your bodies colliding. He couldn’t deny how erotic it was to see you get fucked, but a twang of jealousy and pain struck his heart that he wasn’t the one making your body shake in pleasure.

He hears a voice, it sounds familiar although he can’t quite place it, telling you he’s about to cum. Megumi leans forward more, slightly pushing the door as he watches the other man breed you. Just as the door squeaks, the man’s head whips to see the door and he makes eye contact with Megumi.

“____, what are you doing?” Megumi questions as he practically stumbles into the room. You lift your head to see Megumi looking at you and Naoya in horror. Shame and embarrassment overcome you, and you move to cover yourself with some blankets as Naoya got off of you and faced Megumi,

“I think it’s more appropriate to ask what are you doing, Megumi?” Naoya’s staring daggers into Megumi; he’s unaffected that his family member caught him in a compromising position, almost as if he’s used to it.

“I was coming to get ___ for dinner… I didn’t realize she was busy being a disgusting fucking whore and sleeping with my family though.” He looks over to you, making eye contact as he sees tears form in the corners of your eyes. He doesn’t actually think you’re disgusting, quite the opposite in fact. But he’s so upset that someone else got to be with you first, and Naoya of all people. As if that scum deserved to be with someone like you.

Naoya could instantly tell what was going on here. He can read Megumi like a book, and smirks as he grabs fistfuls of your hair and pulls you against his chest to taunt Megumi. “Looks like you lost. This is why I’ve always been superior to you. You wanted this little slut, huh? Mad that I broke her in first, aren’t you?” His voice is laced with amusement as he provokes Megumi. He pulls your head to be almost level with his as he spits onto your face. “Your little friend is quite the slut, I had a lot of fun using her like the whore she is. She probably wouldn’t even mind if you joined in, isn’t that right bitch?”

Despite the predicament you were in, you couldn’t help but feel aroused at Naoya’s manhandling and suggestion of Megumi joining in. It had never crossed your mind, although Megumi is quite attractive, you didn’t think he was interested. You were only able to mutter out a small “yes” as you look over to Megumi, noticing the flush in his cheeks reaching all the way to the ends of his ears, and the straining bulge in his pants.

“I’m sorry, ___... Be good for me, please?” He was almost pleading as he was walking over to the bed, already starting to strip.

“You can hurt her and call her names, that dumb whore likes it.” Naoya says, moving aside to let Megumi have easier access to you. You’re still lying on your back, barely recovered from getting your guts rearranged only minutes before. Megumi stands in front of you before kneeling down to get at eye level with your cunt. Naoya hadn’t been able to get up since Megumi stumbled into the room; because of this, your womb was filled to the brim with Naoya’s hot cum leaking out of your small hole. Megumi’s eyes were immediately locked on at the lewd sight before him when he used both hands to grip your thighs and spread them apart.

He moved a slender finger past your leaking hole, scooping a bit of cum up with his fingers as he dragged his finger across your clit. The sharp inhale and moan you made sounded absolutely divine to Megumi, urging him to keep going. “Good girl…” he purrs, as he moves his long fingers down to your hole again, once again scooping another glob of cum. “Sit up, slut,” He commands as he stands up. You comply, not willing to play any games in a situation like this. He shoves his cum covered fingers into your mouth; you lap it up and suck his fingers without having to be told anything. Megumi grins. “Good girl, ____. Such a good girl.”

“I bet you like that, don’t you slut?” You hear Naoya’s remark from aside you, he’s watching all of this unfold right before him. Megumi takes his fingers out of your mouth, Naoya grips you with fistfuls of hair and forces you to look at him. “Answer me, bitch.” He glares at you intensely.

“Yes… yes sir… I do.” You try to look anywhere except him but Naoya isn’t having it.

“When men are speaking, you show them the respect they deserve. That means you answer clearly and fucking pay attention. Got it?” He tugs your head to face him, leaning in closer until he’s only a few inches from your face. “Open your mouth, bitch. And don’t swallow until I tell you to.” You comply and he spits into your mouth, before closing the gap and letting his lips crash into yours. He bites your lip, drawing blood. The metallic essence mixes with his spit before Naoya leans back and instructs you to swallow. It feels perverse and humiliating to admit that it turned you on.

Megumi dropped onto his knees again, this time pushing his slender fingers into your cunt. It feels different this time for you; he’s gentler as he stretches you open. He takes his time adding more fingers, taking in every moment and feeling.

“Let’s change the position, yeah Megumi?” Naoya says it more as a statement and less of a question as he’s already moving to rest on the bed against the wall, pillows propping him up. He pulls you away from Megumi while simultaneously flipping you onto your tummy. He pulls you into his lap, supporting your arms until you’re able to prop yourself up above his cock. One hand grips the back of your head and pulls you closer to his thick cock. He pulls you by your hair, aligning your mouth with the tip of his cock as he forcefully shoves your head down. You nearly gag, pushing against him as he tries to use your mouth. Despite your resistance, Naoya doesn’t seem to care and is chasing his own high using you to get him off. You take him into your mouth, inexperienced but trying to adjust quickly. Naoya gives you barely any time to try and settle within the rhythm he’s created. You basically gag on his cock every time he plunges it slightly deeper than the last, but this only enhances Naoya’s pleasure.

While Naoya’s aggressive use of your mouth is going on, Megumi is taking his time to explore you from behind. His fingers are touching every part of your body he can get to, settling on your ass that he starts to spread apart. He’s entranced by the glistening of your cunt in the light, lost in thought about how lewd you look taking Naoya’s cock while bent over for him like a full course meal. He’s done with his “inspection” and moves one of his slender fingers to your entrance. He slips it in easily, listening to you moan with a cock stuffed in your mouth. Naoya pushes your head down farther along his length, trying to hit the back of your throat. You try to control your breathing in time with his rhythm.

Megumi slips another finger inside, stretching your cunt. “Fuck, ____, I didn’t think you were this tight.” He groans as he starts fucking you with his fingers. The lewd sounds he forces out you vibrate around Naoya’s cock. His other hand is grabbing fistfuls of your hair, face fucking you harder as your dripping cunt takes another of Megumi’s fingers. Megumi picks up pace, bringing another hand to your clit to add extra stimulation, but mostly so he can see you writhe and squirm under him while trying to hold yourself up.

“Will you be a good girl for me and cum, ___?” Megumi coos, stringing you along with his praises. “You look like such a dirty girl right now, already about to cum with just my fingers. So cute.” He finger fucks you harder now, making lewd wet noises as his fingers slam back into your pussy. His other hand is toying with your clit, drawing circles and rubbing the little button to bring you closer to your ecstasy. You can feel the knot tightening in your stomach, feeling yourself be pushed over the edge with his fingers alone.

Naoya thrusts into your throat, choking you and momentarily leaving you without air as Megumi pushes you over the edge. You feel your cunt tighten around his fingers as the waves of pleasure wash over you, the lack of air adding to your heightened senses. You moan as you’re cumming, giving just enough sensation to Naoya for him to creampie your throat. His cum is being forced down your throat, yet there’s still so much that some leaks from the corners of your mouth as his cock is pushed against the back of your throat. He finally shows mercy and pulls out as you’re coming down from your high. You force yourself to as much as you can before gasping for air, panting as you trying to calm down again.

“You did a good job taking all of me, slut.” Naoya grins as he lifts your chin with one of his fingers, leaning down to give you a kiss as you share his cum in your mouth. You didn’t think he’d be into some perverted shit like that, yet he’s basically tongue fucking your mouth still full of his cum. He pulls away, a long string of saliva and cum still connecting you two.

Megumi watches you two, his cock throbbing so intensely it almost hurts. He wastes no time in pulling his pants and boxers down before spitting in his hand and lubing his cock up. He’s shuffling behind you, lining himself up with your cunt before he pushes in at full force, giving you no time to adjust to his monstrous cock. You let out a yelp, air evacuating your lungs at the surprise intrusion. He’s balls deep near instantly in your tight hole, stretching you open with a cock that is even girthier than Naoya’s.

Naoya is watching you, grinning, and lazily stroking his cock. You have no idea how he’s able to keep going for multiple rounds, only a little bit of time in between. But you don’t care. The man in front of you is irresistibly hot even though his attitude is garbage. You would do anything he asked no matter how degrading it is in hopes that he would manhandle you again. As these thoughts cross your mind, Megumi reels you back into reality as he pushes so deep into your womb you’re sure he probably bruised your cervix.

“Your pussy is amazing, sweetheart. You have no idea… hah.. how long I’ve been wanting this.” Megumi praises you, unable to control his breathy moans as he continues fucking you with full force. One of your arms is pulled to your side, Megumi interlocking fingers and holding your hand as he drills into you. Even in a situation like this, he can’t help but do some cute shit.

His other hand lightly smacks your ass as you whimper in pleasure, unable to hide the fact that you like it a little rough. Megumi lets go of your hand as you feel both his arms snake around your waist, pulling you up and against his chest as he fucks you. Your back is to his chest, on full display for Naoya in front of you. His shiteating grin is plastered on his face as he has a front row view of Megumi’s cock sliding in and out of you. He gets up from his seated position to face you. Megumi’s arms are still wrapped around your body, supporting you as he drills into your cunt. You can feel his breath against your neck and hear his soft whimpers in your ear. “You’re doing so well, slut. Such a good girl for me huh?” He whispers into your ear. His words send chills down your spine as he keeps ramming his cock into you, abusing your poor hole.

Naoya moves closer to you, his face only a few inches away from yours. He kisses you slowly, before aggressively trying to fill your mouth with his tongue. He pulls away, spits on your face, and lightly slaps your face. “You love taking your friend’s cock, huh? Didn’t think it would be that good, did you? Who knew you’d be the family’s fuckdoll.” He chuckles at his degrading joke, but you couldn’t help but internalize his words. You have no idea how you got to be in this situation, but you were definitely not complaining. Something about multiple men of the same family using you how they liked made your cunt drip at the mere thought of it.

Naoya moves his mouth to your neck, leaving little marks on your skin to prove he was there. Little bruises of his lust for you, marking your skin like you’re property. Megumi start pulling out with only the tip left inside, before bottoming out into your cunt. He groans beside you, lost in the addictive pleasure that is you. Megumi was no virgin, but he believed you were the best person he’s ever fucked, your body insanely attractive and your personality catching and reeling him, unable to resist you.

Naoya moves back before bringing a hand to your neck, gripping your throat and momentarily cutting off your oxygen. “Megumi… fuck this bitch harder when I choke her, okay? She fucking loves it.” And he wasn’t wrong, you did love it. He gripped your throat, a smirk planted on his features as he watched you helpless and at his mercy. Some drool started dripping out of your mouth and you could feel your vision starting to haze around the edges. Megumi fucked into you harder, pulling you closer to his body. Naoya let his grip loosen a bit around your throat, enough to allow some air to fill your lungs again.

“I’m close, baby. I’m gonna fill you up okay? Be a good girl and take all of it for me.” Megumi purrs beside you. Naoya takes this moment to strengthen the grip around your throat, cutting off your air. You feel Megumi’s speed pick up, him desperately chasing his orgasm. You can hear his staggered whimpers as he empties his load into your cunt, filling your already full womb even more. Naoya releases his hand from your throat, making you choke and gasp for air. He’s looking down at you with sadistic satisfaction as you struggle to catch your breath.

Megumi pulls out and lets go of your waist, and you plop down onto the bed absolutely fucked out. Naoya is quick to get off the bed and start dressing. He finishes so quickly it’s as if he was speedrunning it (he has done this many, many, MANY times before). He gives you a quick peck on the lips and gently rubs your cheek before starting to walk towards the door. “See you soon, slut,” he says as he walks out, closing the door behind him this time. Megumi returns with a clean towel, gently cleaning you up as you just lay their like a limp fish.

“You did so well for me. Thank you,” he says as he kisses your cheeks and then your lips before pulling away and picking up some clothes for you. He tosses you a simple outfit to wear and begins dressing himself as well. “Ready for dinner? You’re gonna meet the rest of my family now.” You nod your head yes, anticipating who else you’re going to meet.

‹𝟹 notes: this was originally suppsed to be a oneshot, but i felt like it was getting too long. i have plans for all of them and wasn't going to be able to execute it in just a oneshot. let me know what y'all think!

feedback is always appreciated!! thank you all!!!

ch 2 (soon)

‹𝟹 notifs: @vvxxccaa @arylaa @starshipxoxo

ʚ join my notifs ɞ

(･ω･)つ divider creds to @/cafekitsune and @/eloquentreverie

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steddieas-shegoes · 1 year

Note

Steve Harrington having a stutter? maybe Eddie and Steve are in an interview after revealing their relationship to the public (kinda ties with ur rockstar eddie drabbles?) and people make fun of his stutter. Hes always had it, he just doesn't talk in public so its a surprise to everyone that he has a stutter and that they actually get to hear his voice

So I know the request said he always had the stutter, but I wanted to do something head trauma related for this because Eddie is gonna get a little overprotective and says some stuff about his very amazing husband to be. I've never written a character having a stutter before, so I hopefully made it realistic. In my head, he struggled with some hard consonants and 'th', 'ch', and 'sh' sounds. - Mickala ❤️

------------------------------------------------------

“Everyone please give your warmest welcome to Eddie Munson and Steve Harrington!”

They walked onto the stage with smiles and waves, hands clasped between them as they walked to the couch they’d be sitting on for their interview.

They chose this talk show host, Hannah, because she wasn’t pushy, asked heartfelt questions, and wanted to get the genuine stories out there.

Steve had been nervous to be on any talk show, so he was the one who made the decision to be on this one and Eddie was happy to oblige.

Her viewers may not have been his usual crowd, but if it made Steve more comfortable, he didn’t really care.

“Wow, that was a warm welcome!” Eddie exclaimed.

He wanted to keep it light; Steve’s hand in his was sweaty and shaking, and he knew Hannah could see his nerves.

“I think everyone is just so excited to have you here! You’re not our usual guest, I’ll be honest, so you’re shaking things up for all of us.” She smiled before looking at Steve. “Now, let’s get the elephant in the room out of the way first. Steve, that ring on your finger sure is a beauty!”

He glanced down at it for a moment, smiling to himself.

Eddie proposed a month ago, on their week-long getaway to Greece, and as much as they tried to hide it, it was on the cover of every tabloid and online news article within 24 hours.

They hadn’t even come out officially yet.

It caused Steve to panic, and then Eddie panicked, and then they both decided to take control of their own narrative and do this interview.

“Th-thank you,” Steve replied. “Eddie did g-good, didn’t he?”

Steve’s stutter was barely noticeable when they were in a comfortable environment, especially since they’d been together for so long. But when they were in a stressful situation, or around new people, or both, it became more obvious.

Steve had already spoken to Hannah about it beforehand, said he wouldn’t mind talking about it as long as it wasn’t the focus of the interview. She agreed and said that she would follow his lead on everything, and Eddie warned her he wouldn’t hesitate to walk them both off the stage if Steve got uncomfortable.

“He did great! Honestly, I’ll have to get you to show my husband how to pick an engagement ring. Bless his heart, he tried. Luckily, we married for love and not his ability to know what I want in a ring.”

The audience laughed, and Steve couldn’t help letting out a small giggle.

“Soooo…tell us how he did it!” Hannah continued, eyes glimmering under the stage lights.

“Um.” Steve took in a shaky breath. “We were at a p-priv-vate d-dinner on the beach-ch.” Eddie squeezed his hand once, smiling over at him as he let him lead. “He s-sang me a s-song and th-then proposed.”

“How romantic,” Hannah rested her head in her hands and sighed. “Everyone in the audience is going to show this to their significant others for them to take notes, I’m sure.”

“He left out the part where I also bought him the fancy wine he wanted only for it to be the worst thing we’ve ever tasted and we ended up giving it to a couple further down the beach,” Eddie added, playfully nudging Steve’s shoulder.

“Yeah, w-well,” Steve shrugged, blushing profusely.

“What a letdown! Hopefully the other couple liked it,” Hannah laughed.

“They didn’t complain, but honestly we didn’t stick around for too long. We were freshly engaged and had much better things to be doing,” Eddie winked at the audience.

“Oh, I bet you did!” Hannah smiled before getting more serious. “So you’ve been together for a while?”

“We were friends when we were really young, and it grew into more when Steve was supporting me and my band in the local bar scene. We’ve dated for almost four years now.”

“Awww. And you’ll be getting married pretty soon, right?” Hannah asked.

“Yes, we d-decided on next March-ch,” Steve added. “Spring is when w-we met-t.”

“Lovely! I’m sure the wedding will be quite the party.”

“We’re keeping it pretty small, just family and our circle of friends. My bandmates will be there. Just us back at home with the people who love us,” Eddie smiled.

“I think that sounds wonderful.” Hannah clapped her hands. “So, Eddie, with all this excitement in your personal life, what’s it look like for the band?”

“I’ll be on tour with them for August and September, and then we’ll be working hard on recording the next album in October and November so we can have it out next year. I won’t be doing anything else until after the wedding, though. I promised Stevie I’d help him plan everything.”

The crowd cheered, and Steve spoke up.

“He also p-promised t-to visit the loc-cation with me in Novemb-ber so we’ll see,” Steve teased, seeming to relax quite a bit more.

The interview carried on, mostly focusing on Eddie’s band and some more casual talk of the wedding and future plans.

Steve never completely relaxed, but he seemed much more at ease as Hannah focused more on Eddie for a few minutes, smiling at Steve when he decided to add something.

“Alright, that’s all the time we have boys! It was lovely to have you and we’re so looking forward to your future together!”

The audience cheered, the boys waved goodbye, and they walked back to the green room to grab some water before going back to their hotel.

Eddie stopped Steve in the hall, ignoring the people passing by, and pulled Steve against him.

“I’m so proud of you, sweetheart,” he whispered against his lips before pressing a soft kiss there. “You’re amazing.”

“Eds, st-stop,” Steve blushed.

“Nope, wanna tell you all the time. You’re incredible.”

“F-fine.”

—--------------------

Steve is a lovely person, and I will not tolerate hate comments on anything related to the interview I did with him and Eddie. My team always does the best with reporting hate comments, so keep that in mind before posting something you may regret later. Any Eddie Munson fan should know that Eddie wouldn’t accept this disgusting behavior towards his fiance.

Steve could feel tears welling in his eyes as he read Hannah’s lovely public comment about some of the hate she’d been receiving in regards to their interview.

One comment in particular had hurt to see: a fan claiming that Eddie just felt bad for him and didn’t want to break up with him because Steve would run to the press with negative stories about him.

Eddie was still asleep, hadn’t seen most of what was being posted since the interview aired first thing that morning, but Steve did.

He liked Hannah’s statement and posted it to his Instagram story with a heart emoji.

He went through some responses from Eddie’s bandmates and liked them, too.

Steve is probably the best thing that’s happened to all of us, so any “fan” of ours who doesn’t see how awesome he is, consider yourself uninvited to any show. Gareth posted.

You guys better hope Eddie doesn’t hop on here and see all this or he’ll end up hunting you for sport. Jeff joked, though Steve knew that he may be more right than not.

Imagine being so jealous of someone that you decide to make fun of the one thing they’re self-conscious about. Couldn’t be me. Grant posted on all his social media profiles.

Then he saw Robin’s post and his heart stopped for a moment.

My best friend is the bravest person I know. He only has a stutter because he risked his life to protect me. If head trauma is a joke to you, then I hope you find new material soon. When Eddie sees this, he’s gonna lose his shit.

Steve let out a mix of a sob and a laugh, startling Eddie awake.

“What is it, sweetheart? What’s wrong?” he asked as he sat up in their bed.

“I g-guess p-people aren’t a b-big fan of me,” he said as he held his phone out towards Eddie to show him what was going on.

Eddie’s face flushed red with anger before he calmly handed Steve his phone back.

“Eds?”

Eddie silently reached for his own phone and pulled up his notes app.

Steve watched him type furiously for a few minutes, then screenshot a couple of times, and open Instagram.

“Eds…it’s fine. Not w-worth it.”

But it was too late, and Steve’s phone went off with a notification that he’d been tagged in Eddie’s post.

It was a series of pictures, the first being a picture taken of them shortly after Steve’s worst head injury, when he barely could speak at all.

The next few images were the screenshots from Eddie’s phone.

I can’t believe I have to say this, but here goes. Steve Harrington, soon-to-be Munson, is the best person I know. I am lucky to be able to wake up next to him, to call him mine, to be his. He is incredibly brave, incredibly loving, and much too forgiving. He will be much nicer than I will. He is not defined by his stutter, but it is a part of his life, and it does impact him much more than he should ever have to worry about. But that picture you just saw? That was a man who could barely even say my name. I thought I would never hear him even say my name again. I’ve seen comments making fun of how he talks, how long it takes him to say some things, his intelligence. And I won’t tolerate it. If you have anything negative to say about him, unfollow me before I block you myself. Fame means absolutely nothing to me compared to this man, and I won’t let him suffer through the bullying just so I can make some fucking music. See yourself out or see us be happy. Up to you.

The last image was a picture of them the night before, cozy in their bed, Steve looking into the camera while Eddie looked at him, so much love passing from him it was almost a physical presence.

“Eds-” Steve started.

“I love you. I won’t let anyone let you think for a second that I don’t,” Eddie said fiercely.

“I know. I l-love you, t-too.”

They both shut off their phones for the rest of the day, didn’t care much for anything outside of their bed.

Steve called Hannah to thank her for everything the next day, and she was grateful to hear from him. He explained that he wouldn’t be doing any more interviews, but was glad he’d had a positive experience with her.

“Do you think Eddie will come back to the show someday to talk about you?” she asked.

“I th-think you’ll reg-gret asking him back. He won’t sh-shut up about me,” Steve smirked to himself.

“He shouldn’t. You’re both so lucky to have each other.”

“Yeah. W-we are.”

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #ficlet #request #rock star eddie munson #modern au #established relationship

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arrows-craft-corner · 11 months

Text

Invader zim crochet pattern

IMPORTANT INFO (PLEASE READ BEFORE YOU GO ON TO THE PATTERN):

THIS PATTERN IS WRITTEN IN U.S. TERMINOLOGY

PLEASE DO NOT SELL MY PATTERN ON ETSY, RAVELRY, OR ANY STORE OF THE LIKE, BUT YOU CAN REPOST IT AS LONG AS YOU LINK IT TO MY BLOG (millys-craft-corner) OR TIKTOK/YOUTUBE (fiestywyvern) FEEL FREE TO SELL ANY FINISHED PRODUCTS. Be sure to link me if you post your Zims as I’d love to see them.

Zim stands at about 5 inches tall or 12.7 cm, not including antennae

Techniques used

Inc

Dec

Triple dec

Triple inc

Magic ring

Chain

Basic embroidery and sew techniques

Not so well known techniques used

Triple inc- an increase with 3 stitches in one stitch instead of 2

Triple dec- a decrease going across 3 stitches instead of 2

Materials

3.5 mm crochet hook

size 3 or light worsted or light yarn weight in these colors light green, black, deep ruby red, light grey, and light pink

aluminum wire in size 14 or pipe cleaners

black embroidery thread

a medium sized sewing needle

tapestry needle

pliers if you’re using wire

hot glue

light pink felt

stuffing

Head and torso (make 1)- start with green

R1: 4sc in mr (4)

R2: triple inc around (12)

R3: 1 sc, (triple inc, 2sc)x3, triple inc, 1sc (20)

R4: 2sc, (triple inc, 4sc)x3, triple inc, 2sc (24)

R5: 3sc, (triple inc, 6sc)x3, triple inc, 3sc (36)

R6: 4sc, (triple inc, 8sc)x3, triple inc, 4sc (44)

R7: blo

R7-16: sc around (10 rounds) (44)

R17: blo- 4sc, (triple dec, 8 sc)x3, triple dec, 4sc (36)

R18: 3sc, (triple dec, 6sc)x3, triple dec, 3sc (28)

R19: 2sc, (triple dec, 4sc)x3, triple dec, 2sc (20)

R20: sc, (triple dec, 2sc)x3, triple dec, sc (12)

R21: dec around (charge to light pink at the end) (6)

R22: inc around (charge to red at the end) (12)

R23: sc around (12)

R24: inc, sc around (18)

R25-30: sc around (6 rounds) (18)

R31: blo- dec, sc around (12)

R32: dec around (6)

F/o, leave a long tail and 3 embroider stripes, using black yarn, so they cut the torso into thirds

Use the tail to close up piece

Shoulder pads (make 2)- light pink

R1: ch 5 and sc down from the 2nd chain from the hook, ch 1 and turn (4)

R2: 2 dec, ch 1 and turn (2)

R3: dec

F/o and leave a long tail for sewing

Arms (make 2)- start with black

R1: 3sc in mr (3)

R2: sc around (3)

R3: inc around (6)

R4: sc around (6)

R5: dec around (3)

R6: sc around (change to pink at the end) (3)

R7-10: sc around (4 rounds) (3)

F/o leave a long tail for sewing and embroider stripes using sewing needle and black thread

Legs (make 2)- black

R1: 4sc in mr (4)

R2: inc around (8)

R3-7: sc around (5 rounds) (8)

F/o and leave a long tail for sewing

Feet (make 2)- black

R1: 3sc in mr (3)

R2: sc, inc, sc (4)

R3: sc, inc, 2sc inc (6)

R4: 2sc, inc, 2sc, inc (8)

F/o leave a long tail for sewing

Pak (make 1)- light grey

R1: 4sc in mr (4)

R2: inc, sc (6)

R3: 2inc, sc, inc, 2sc (9)

R4: 2sc, 4inc, 2sc, slst (13)

R5-6: sc around (2 rounds) (13)

F/o leave a long tail for sewing

Big pak spot (make 1)- light pink

R1: 4sc in mr (4) Sl st into 1st stitch

f/o and leave a long tail for sewing

Small pak spot (make 2)- light pink

R1: 3sc in mr (3) sl st into 1st stitch

F/o and leave a long tail for sewing

Eyes (make 2)- red

R1: 6sc in mr (6)

R2: inc around (12)

R3: 4sc, 2inc, 4sc, 2inc (16)

R4-5: sc around (2 rounds) (16)

Antennae (make 2)- black

R1: 3 sc in mr (3)

R2-19: sc around (18 rounds) (3)

Assembly

Sew arms to shoulder pads

Sew bottom of feet to the sides of the legs so they create an “L” shape

Sew pak spots to the pak

Sew pak to body

Sew arms to body

Sew legs to body

Sew eyes to the lower left and lower right sides of the head

Cut out eyeshine out of light pink felt and hot glue it or sew it to the eyes

Cut 2 pieces of 5 inches of pipe cleaner/wire and fold in an inch on both sides so it’s 3 inches long. Insert them into each the antennae and sew antennae towards the back of the head. Fold back 1/4 of the antenna so it creates a right angle.

Congrats you just finished your irken invader, now go take over the earth!

#invader zim #invader zim art #crochet #amigurumi #crochet pattern #zim iz

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maaikeatthefullmoon · 4 months

Text

This week I have mostly been reading...

May 13-19th, 2024

New idea I've had, and hopefully something I'll have time to do once a week on a Sunday. Over the past seven days, I have devoured the following Good Omens fanfics, and I recommend these most heartily to you:

Completed works I've read this week:

Boyfriend Debut by snae_b Rated E - A & C are both porn actors. It sounds seedy. It's not. Holy Hell, it's not. It's one of the hottest things I've ever read, but also so, so sweet and delightful.

They Drink Tea At The End by @knifeforkspooncup Rated T - After a year spent in Heaven, A returns to C in the bookshop completely and utterly overstimulated in every sensory capacity. A wonderful, sweet story of them truly knowing each other and an excellent example of how the fandom relates to GO in so many beautiful ways.

Pay Per View by IneffableToreshi Rated E - A lovely story set in Canada, full of our so frequently seen miscommunication between A & C. And, as the author says: "Also, why the fuck is Aziraphale watching porn in their hotel room?! And taking notes?!"

Cranking Up The Heat by @vavoom-sorted-art Rated E - Well, the title says it all, really. And the fic's description: "The equivalent of that hot wings challenge, but with porn." Don't really want to say much more, as you've gotta see it to enjoy it.

On The Same Page by Chekhov Rated E - A fake marriage fic with Only One Bed. A & C are both authors, but two very different ones. Excellently written with very vividly described mental struggles with internal homophobia & self loathing.

A Model Guardian by Fuuma_san Rated E - As a former model, I found this fic really interesting. I'd genuinely love to know what the author's tie/experience in the industry is. C is a model, A is their bodyguard. An interesting tale which involves some great discussion on gender.

In The Room Where You Sleep by @mrghostrat Rated E - Another banger by ghostrat, posted in its entirety this week. In a reversal to many other fics I've seen, A is a vampire and C is a vampire hunter. *Homer Simpson voice* With sexy results. ;)

WIPs which have updated this week (which I devour as soon as I get the update!)

There Is A Light And It Never Goes Out by @phoen1xr0se Rated M - A is a researcher (puffins!), C is a lighthouse keeper on the island where A has run away to to escape his problems and do his research. The author has recently spent a week studying puffins - which is the ultimate dedication, if you ask me. Ch 9/26 posted this week

Find The Light by @klikandtuna Rated E - Headmaster A and Rockstar C. The story teases out a fraught history between them whilst keeping a tension between them in the modern day. Ch 4/? posted this week.

Terminus by @emotional-support-demon-crowley Rated T - Astronaut A is guided back to Earth by controller C after 92 years in space. There are many difficulties both of them have to face and they develop an amazing rapport. Ch 15/17 posted this week.

Oddity by @tsyvia48 Rated E - Actor C is contracted by (useless) Gabriel to guest curate an exhibition at the museum where A works. After getting off on the wrong foot, can they work together to pull off this show? Ch 22/24 posted this week.

Under The Summer Stars by @pannotbread Rated E - This wonderful fic has taught me more about physics than school ever did (mostly because I never did any physics, but...well). A & C have to share their time at an observatory because there is Only One Telescope. Not only will you learn about astrophysics, astrobiology, and astroecology, you'll also read some of the most poetically, beautifully written masturbation scenes I've ever seen. *ahem* Ch 6/13 posted this week.

Free by well, me: imposterssyndrome Rated E - A & C meet (again?) in an acute mental health ward after both having had mental health crises. A runs a bookshop but is very much under his parents' control. C has been homeless since childhood and has struggled his entire life. They do not trust each other when they first meet, but feel strangely drawn to one another all the same. Where will this lead them? This is a passion piece for me. There is a lot of lived experience in it, and extensive research from both professionals and peers. It has been a real journey for me to write it, and as I'm coming closer to the end it's becoming very emotional for me. Ch 43/? posted this week

#fics i read this week #good omens fanfiction #fanfic update #fanfic rec #fanfiction #imposterssyndrome #good omens fanfic rec

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speedycoffeedelight · 2 months

Text

An Animalistic Disaster

CH-24: An abandoned shelter

Summery : Angel and Niffty explore the basement of the cabin as you try your best to not let your cousin and Jake mingle (and fail miserably)

Masterlist

" Angel! Angel are you okay??"

Niffty quickly ran up to the spider that fell down the stairs. One of the steps was rather worn out as they were coming down. It creaked a bit when Niffty stepped on it but it couldn't handle Angel's weight as his foot went inside. Causing the boy to lose his footing and go spiraling downwards screaming.

Angel fell on the dirty floorboard with a 'thuck' as dust went flying all around him, causing him to cough violently. His light fell down beside him, now going a bit dimmer. Niffty soon joined beside him, checking for any injuries. " I'm *cough* fine toots.." his voice seemed to echo throughout the room as a rat scurried away.

He quickly grabbed the flashlight and gave it a few hits as the colour returned to being bright as it once was. Angel and Niffty held each others hand as they shone the light inside.

There was a big empty space in front of them with some pillars around. No, not completely empty, as they moved the flashlights, they saw a few crates and barrels scattered around in the corner. The space had to be twice as big as the cabins. There were dust and spiderwebs everywhere.

He again gulped as they stepped in, their footfalls echoed with every step. Soon enough they reached the other side of the room. " A-Angel... what's that??" Niffty said pointing down at something.

Angel quickly flashed his flashlight towards it, it was a broken boby doll, a few cockroaches scattered away from the hollow side of the face. " Eugh...what the.." He quickly looked away from it as they focused on going to investigate the crates instead. He didn't dare to go towards the open ones since he saw a rat scurrying to get in there, so there must be a nest of them or something. Instead he went to a closed one.

He handed Niffty his flashlight as blew the dust away from its side crouching down. Most of the paint had already worn off, so it was indistinguishable to see what was written. After looking for a bit, he picked up a rusty looking crow bar close enough to the boxes. On the count to three, he popped open the lid as they both peeked inside.

" These are..cans..." Niffty picked up one. " These are canned mushrooms...and this one's biscuits! They look old!!" Niffty said holding them. They also found some old daily life necessities like pots and teared up clothes. It was clear people once used to live here. Angel quickly began to put two and two together. " This..this must have been some kind of shelter." He whispered looking at Niffty.

" We need to let others know."

You stood there agape for some time. Melody looked at you in confusion before she opened the door fully and took in the visitor. Her eyes widened seeing the handsome stranger as they locked eyes together.

Jake was wearing a loose grey hoodie with black loose pants. His black hair looked a bit unruly and messy. However that only added to his looks. Melody gasped as she sat Husk down on the floor and nudged you in the arms.

" You didn't tell me you had a handsome boyfriend as well~ how dare you!"

If you could melt into the floor right then and there, you would have. It's far better than the flow of embarrassment that just went through you. You were going to give her a good smack as soon as Jake was out of the house.

Jake just chuckled and leaned down towards Melody. " That would be something. but I'm afraid I'm just her good ol' neighbour. Here to make amends with girlie right here. For what it's worth, I think you're cute as well. " He said with a wink making Melody flush.

Oh no, this was not happening. You were not letting these two mingle together and let him seduce your precious cousin. With what you know about Melody, this guy was soon going to be her new crush if you let things just roll out. He had both the looks and the vibe for it.

" Oh well, Let me introduce you two. Jake this is Melody, my dearest cousin. And Melody, this is Jake, my new neighbour that I have been graced with. " You said as fast as you could and stood between them while looking up at Jake. Melody huffed at this and leaned over from your shoulder.

" So Jake, to what do I owe the pleasure? You said you were here to make.. amends? "

" Yes, to say sorry for the trouble my friends and I caused you and I felt like a welcoming gift was long overdue. So I brought you-" he lifted up the package and the container. " Some fresh cut of venison from my hunts and some rabbit stew cooked by yours truly."

Melody's eyes began glittering behind you. So this tall, dark and mysterious guy can not only hunt, but also could cook. What a catch! She had to know more about him.

She shoved you aside quickly and held out her hand towards him. " It's a pleasure to meet you Jake!" The tinge of excitement of her voice was easily noticeable by you. Jake held both the container and the meat in one hand and extended the other to handshake. Melody's hand was tiny compared to Jake's. The size difference was also noticeable to all three of you as you scowled looking at the scene while the other two looked at each other lovingly (from your point of view at least).

You quickly got behind Melody again and pulled her close to you with a tight lipped smile, breaking the handshake much to Melody's disappointment. " Melody! You came all the way here just now. I'm sure you must be exhausted! You go ahead to relax in my room while I see him out, okay?" Melody pouted looking up at you. " What? See him out? He just came too! Invite him over for tea at least." Your grip on her shoulder tightened, with your nails digging into her skin. Melody showed her tongue at you for a split second before quickly getting out of your grasp and holding his hand to drag him inside before you could say anything. The audacity of this girl.

Melody sat with him on the sofa seemingly bubbling inside with excitement. She quickly began chattering with him as you went to go store the venison and the stew he brought. You and Melody could have the stew for dinner, that is if he didn't poison it. You sighed now going over to the pair, praying to god's above to give you the strength to see this through.

Previously, Husk ran out as soon as he got the chance and ran up to Pentious, Vox and Cherri. " We gotta hide. (Y/n)'s cousin is here! Melody!" A gasp came from from Pentious and Cherri as Vox looked at the three in confusion. He had no idea who this Melody person was or their importance.

Cherri quickly crouched down to his height. " Is she here to stay or for a quick visit? I wanna take a peek at the gal. " She said excitedly. " Are you outta your damn mind?! We can't let anyone else see us!" Husk snapped a paw at her leg making her go back quickly. " Okay, okay damn, you're no fun old man..where would we even go?"

" Guys! Come with us. we found a fucking abandoned shelter!"

Suddenly Angel and Niffty were in front of them covered in dust and holding a torchlight. Husk looked at the two and looked over at Cherri.

" Guess we know where to at least hide now."

Soon enough, the five of them began to descend down the stairs of the basement. They took some leftover lights from Pentious's workplace as Niffty told them excitedly how she found it while cleaning. After she was done, Husk told them about Melody and Jake.

" Wait, isn't that like? Super bad? How long do we have to stay away?"

" Hell if I know, that girl had a lot of suitcases with her."

Cherri tsk'ed while Vox was listening to every word with eagerness. Jake was another new name to him. And by the looks of It, unlike Melody, this Jake person wasn't well liked in the group. It wasn't like he was very welcome to talk with them in the first place so all he could do was just listen. Pentious got spooked by some of the things there making him yelp as Niffty ran around the whole place looking at every corner. " I finally have something to clean!!"

Cherri sighed looking at the hyperactive girl. " At least someone's happy." Niffty suddenly stopped in front of a place that looked like an entrance of sorts but it was blocked off with rubble. She called the others to see.

" Maybe it leadsss to ssomewhere?" Pentious said shrugging. " Probably, but we don't have time to search for that now. We need to know about the situation in the cabin." Cherri said crossing her arms and then pointed at them. " You guys, stay here and clean while I-" she pointed at her chest. " Go talk with (Y/n)!"

" And why exactly you should be the one to go? Why can't I or the others go?" Vox raised his eyebrows. They seriously didn't think they could use him as some sort of cleaner, did they?

" Because shark-brain, we can't let the others see us as humans, but I can easily get in as a squirrel and talk with her." She said it as a matter of fact proudly. " You are a damn shark who can't even move on the ground in your animal form. Pentious is a snake and it might cause panic with others. Same with Angel, girls aren't really fond of spiders Angie, sorry."

"Well, fuck you too."

" And Niffty will be better of helping you guys clean. She is a maid after all. But she should come with me to get the cleaning supplies."

" What about me? I'm a damn cat? It should be far easier to send me." Husk replied extending his hands. Cherri looked at him up and down uninterestedly. " Well if you go, there's no telling when you'll come back. You said Melody was keen on petting you correct ~"

No one could really say anything after the explanation as Cherri and Niffty climbed up happily, leaving the four boys together standing awkwardly in the basement.

" Um... sshould we start cleaning...?"

"Shut up Pentious.."

Niffty and Cherri turned into their animal forms after going up. They heard talking coming from the kitchen as they went around. Cherri came inside the cabin from the window of your room. Niffty was too small to get up there by herself.

Jake was in the middle of telling how he first met you, making you groan in your plams ready to escape. Especially when he was telling the part of how the hazbins were you friends not pets. The way Jake was telling it made you want to slap the guy in the face as your beloved cousin was dying laughing. You excused yourself to go into the washroom as your eyes fell on Cherri. You quickly picked her up and went to the bathroom and locked the door. Cherri transformed as soon as you two were alone in the secluded place.

" Cherri, you can't stay here. My cousin -" Cherri shushed you with a finger on your lips. " We know, we learnt from Husk. How long is she going to stay?" You told her that you still didn't know. Cherri clicked her tongue. " I'm sorry guys..I didn't know she was going to come." Cherri shushed you again. " Don't worry, we found a place we could stay for now. I'll tell you later, but we need cleaning supplies and things to stay for the night there "

You were confused on what they were talking about but after some quick thinking you were soon placing the extra mattresses, cleaning supplies and pillows in Niffty's hands who waited outside the window. You would give food later after Jake finally goes away so you can sneak it outside. You also told them to be on the look out for Alastor, Charlie and Vaggie so they don't come inside after their work. After ensuring everything was alright, you went back to the pair.

"Then I found her in the alley! And wanna know what I saw?" " What did you see?" " There she was, your cousin, pinning my friend to the ground! The one that I was searching." A gasp came from Melody. " No way..."

You desperately fought the urge to roll your eyes at him as you sat your ass down once again. You felt like a third wheel between them.

After what felt like forever, he stood up to go. " Wait, gimme your number." Your cousin practically shoved her phone to his face. Was she freaking shameless? You shook your head. Jake looked more then happy to give it to him. " I'll talk to you later sweetie ~" he waved while getting out.

Your jaw dropped to the floor while Melody giggled. Did he..did he just call her fucking sweetie?!?! Oh hell no, not if you can help it. You grabbed her arm.

" No!"

"Whaaaat???"

"No, not that boy, I don't trust him!"

Melody squirmed out of your grasp. "Why noooot? He seems fine to me!! He tall, he's handsome, he's mysterious ~" she sighed happily while walking into your room and falling on top of your bed making you groan. Out of all the possibilities....why did this have to happen??

" Whatever, forget that boy. You're never seeing him again. Did you forget how your last relationship went?" Melody puffed her cheeks at you at your words. " He's different!" " Sure he is..now tell me why you came here. And what's with all these luggage?" You pulled your chair and sat on it facing her.

" Owh, I'm here for inspiration for my outfits." Oh right, you remembered suddenly. Melody was studying to become a fashion designer. Her parents were well against it but she pushed through. She also takes orders online for different handmade cosplays sometimes to earn cash.

" I thought staying close to nature with you these few days should do the trick." She replied happily. 'A....few..days..' you thought in your head. That meant the hazbins couldn't stay home for a few days!

" Also where are your animals? I saw the cat, but where's the rest?" Melody said looking around. " Jake told me you had lots of animals!" ' that damn jake...' " oh right ahaha.. they're outside probably. I'll show them later. Make yourself comfortable now."

Niffty went back inside the basement to clean as Cherri stayed out. As soon as Melody went inside the washroom to take a shower, you called Cherri. She soon entered the cabin as you handed her some foods that won't need to be cooked for at least the night. After she left, you quickly began hiding evidence of other people living with you. You cleaned up as much as you could. If Melody asked why things looked different after coming out, you could just say you were cleaning up.

Alastor, Charlie and Vaggie soon arrived home after they finished their shift. They couldn't wait to finally see you after this day that seemed to go on forever. Melody came out of the shower just in time when there was a knock on the door.

Cherri just finished bringing in the food to others as she climbed up and noticed the trio. She quickly began running up to them to stop them as Melody began walking towards the door before you could stop her. Time seemed to go on slow motion as Melody slowly opened the door.

"Hel-"

She was greeted with the sight of a large deer breathing down in front of her with a sheep, a moth and a squirrel. Her words got stuck in her throat as she let go off the door handle. You locked eyes with Alastor as you gulped silently mouthing him to go away. Suddenly all three of them began running off towards the woods as Melody could finally move. She ran to railings and watched them go.

"Was that...was that the deer and the sheep Jake mentioned?!?"

She practically screamed looking at you. Her eyes were twinkling with delight. " Can you call them back again??"

You sighed and held onto her shoulder as you pushed her inside. " No can do. It's late, they need to..get to their home as well. And uh..deers tend to be shy towards newcomers." You were pulling words outta you ass to fool her. " Maybe tomorrow okay? "

Alastor watched as the door closed as he and the others turned into human again.

" So.. that's Melody huh.."

" She's so pretty!! I thought I was looking at a doll! Vaggie, did you see her??"

" Yes, Hun..I did..but what do we do now?"

Cherri cleaned her throat to gather their attention. It was a close call. " Here's the plan for now so listen up!" She then told them about the supposed shelter and the things that happened today. ' Interesting ' Alastor thought in his head. Charlie groaned leaning into Vaggie's shoulder. They couldn't even rest properly after a long day of work? That felt like torture.

But they soon enough reached towards the basement walking quietly as they could. Niffty had already cleaned a good portion of the area for them to lay down their mattresses to sleep. Now she and as well as others were working to make the area as pest free as possible. Cherri, Angel and Alastor practically forced Husk to turn into his cat form to chase away the rats. ( It was mostly Alastor and the threat of his soul). Vox refused to touch any of the things first, but after everyone was talking about throwing him outside, he reluctantly agreed to help.

After making a corner somewhat presentable to stay and guarding the surrounding area, they sat down to eat. This was going to be a long night for the crew.

Meanwhile you were brushing Melody's hair in the cabin as the night went on. You had dinner with the stew Jake brought and luckily enough it wasn't poisoned. Well even if it was, it was taking a long time to take effect. One thing you couldn't deny is that he could actually cook well.

You may have forced Melody to eat a little too much tonight. The mothering side of you took over when you saw how skinny she got and may have threatened to shove food down her throat if she didn't eat. But it was all in good intention. She was now burping as she sat on the bed swinging her legs.

" How long are you planning to stay?" You asked in middle of brushing. " Hm, maybe like a week or so. Depending on how quickly I can get something out." You bit your lip. A week huh..that might be a problem.

You offered her the lounge room to set up her stuff there. She even brought a mannequin that she built up piece by piece. She also had various leathers, clothes and other sewing stuff that you didn't know about. Those things took up most of the suitcases. She only had one suitcase of her own necessary things.

You guys slept rather late in your bed after swapping stories, doing makeovers, randomly singing and other stuff. It was nice to catch up on things.

The next morning while you were making breakfast Cherri snuck in again. You gave her some money for Charlie, Vaggie and Alastor to get breakfast from outside while going to work. The rest can sneak breakfast from the cabin later. It was hard to drive the car undetected but you managed to make Melody focus on something else as they went away. Things were tough.

In the afternoon, you and Melody were sitting beside the lake. Air flowing through your sides as you both chatted. Suddenly you heard a deep meow as you both looked over. Husk came to your side and laid down. He had enough of Angel's stuffs. Soon enough Niffty also came running and almost jumped on your face. You held her as she barked at you. They missed you dearly. So they decided to at least hang out in animal forms.

Angel sneaked into the cabin as a spider earlier and spooked the life out of Melody. She called you to remove the spider. Which you did while scolding the boy. Niffty randomly came and ran around in the house. Melody fixed up a small bowtie for her which she wore proudly. She tried hard to get Husk to wear one too but he evaded every chance he got. You weren't aware of it, but it was their way of watching over you as well.

Pentious could only watch from the distance with sadness because he wasn't allowed to come. He tried once but Melody almost fainted when she saw a snake wrapped around your arm. She knew you were friends with different animals as Jake said but it still felt too unreal and dangerous to see it in front.

That night before going to sleep, you opened the window of the kitchen. Melody had already laid down on the bed. You told here you were going to get a glass of water. Vaggie was already waiting outside as you guys planned beforehand. She sat on your finger that you extended towards her. " Listen, tomorrow, after you guys go to work, have Pentious drive it back home. I plan to take Melody out to town." Vaggie looked at you and moved her antennas.

" In that time, others could come in the cabin to get any things necessary and relax a bit. I'm really sorry that you guys are going through this..I wish there was a better way to handle these.." you looked down sadly.

Suddenly Vaggie flew on top of your head and squeaked. " Hm? You know I don't understand what you're saying right?" You chuckled as she gave another squeak and flew to your cheek and rubbed her tiny head on it. Maybe it was her way of telling you it was alright. It would be nice if that was the case.

" Who are you talking to?"

A.n: I feel like pacing has slowed down a little. I apologize for that🫠 things will go intense again later. Enjoy the peace till then.

Tag list: @legostars @glowinthedarkbones1150 @darifes @aria-tempest @rainbowcake1212 @luxylucylou

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel x reader #alastor x reader #charlie x reader #vaggie x reader #angel dust x reader #husk x reader #Vox x reader #sir pentious x reader #cherri bomb x reader #Human Alastor #human charlie #human Husk #human Angel dust #human Vaggie #Human Vox #human Cherri bomb #Human sir Pentious #human alastor x reader

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autumnalfallingleaves · 5 months

Text

Hello! This was asked for by @kananarchiste and I've finally gotten around to writing it up-- my pattern for my crochet doll of Commander Cody-- and I'm giving it away for free! (If anyone does make this, please tag me-- I'd love to see it!!)

Commander Cody crochet doll pattern

I've never written up a proper pattern before, so I apologize for any confusing bits or mistakes in advance. If you get stuck on something or if something is unclear, please shoot me an ask or DM and I'll do my best to help out.

Additional Pictures:

Yarn Weight: 4

Hook: 4 mm

Colors:

White

Yarn in Jango’s skin tone (I used Lion Brand Yarn’s Skein Tones yarn in adobe)

Black

Dark brown (for scar; contrasts with skin tone)

212th gold/orange (this can be hard to find. I got mine at a local independent store)

Grey

Extra materials:

Buttons and thread OR safety eyes (I used buttons because I like the look of them better)

Stitch markers

Yarn needle

Abbreviations Key:

Ch – chain

Dec – decrease

FO – fasten off

Inc – increase

Rep from * – repeat from *

Sc – single crochet

Sc2tog – single crochet two stitches together

Ss – slip stitch

St – stitch

Additional Notes:

All parts save for some embellishments are worked in the round. It is recommended that the crocheter mark each round for clarity.

Entire doll is worked in single US crochet.

Magic circle is NOT used.

I’m not sure what the gauge is, but mine is quite tight. Use a smaller hook if you feel as though your gauge is too loose.

BODY AND HAIR

Head– in adobe

1. Chain 2. Into the first st, sc 6 and mark with a stitch marker. (6) 2. Sc2 into each sc around. Mark. (12) 3-6. Increase by 6 each round to 48. (48) 7. Sc around. (48) 8. Inc by 6 (54) 9. Sc around. (54) 10. Inc by 6. (60) 11-12. Sc around. (60) 13. Inc by 6. (66) 14-15. Sc around. (66) 16. Inc by 6. (72) 17-18. Sc around. (72) 19. Dec by 6. (66) 20-21. Sc around. (66) 22-34. Dec by 6 in same pattern as increases. FO after crocheting 12 at row 34. Stuff firmly.

Body– in white, grey, black

1. In white, ch2 and sc6 into second st from the hook. Mark. 2-12. Inc by 6 each round to 72. (72) 13-23. Sc around. (72) 24. Sc29 and FO. Ss in with grey and sc14. FO. Ss in with white and finish round. (72) 25. Sc30 and FO. Ss in with grey and sc12. FO. Ss in with white and finish round. (72) 26. Sc31 and FO. Ss in with grey and sc10. FO. Ss in with white and finish round. (72) 27. Sc32 and FO. Ss in with grey and sc8. FO. Ss in with white and finish round. (72) 28. Sc33 and FO. Ss in with grey and sc6. FO. Ss in with white and finish round. (72) 29. Sc34 and FO. Ss in with grey and sc4. FO. Ss in with white and finish round. (72). 30-41. Sc around in white. (72) 42. Dec by 6. (66) 43. Sc around. (66) 44. Dec by 6. (60) 45. Sc around. (60). 46. Dec by 6. (54) 47. Sc around. (54) 48. Dec by 6. (48) 49. Sc around and FO. (48) 50. In black, ss in and dec by 6. (42) 51. Dec by 6. (36) 52. Dec by 6. (30) 53. Dec by 6. (24) At this point, stuff the body firmly. 54. Dec by 6. (18) 55. Dec by 6. (12) 56. Sc around and FO, leaving a long tail, enough to sew the head on. (12) Using grey yarn and a yarn needle, stitch a trooper’s upper chest plate shape (from beginning of black area to about round 45, 5 rows above the grey shape). Center it above the grey shape. Also stitch a belt shape below the shape, shifting to a row below in the middle of the back. For chest plate pattern, see diagram #4. For how to stitch a pattern in, see diagrams #1-3.

Arms– in white, black (make 2)

1. In black, ch2 and sc6 in second ch from hook. Mark. (6) 2. Sc2 in each st around. (12) 3. Inc by 6. (18) 4. Inc by 6. (24) 5. Inc by 6. (30) 6-9. Sc around. (30) 10. Dec by 2. (28) 11. Sc3 and FO. Ss in white and finish the round. (28) 12-14. Sc around. (28) 15. Dec by 2. (26) 16-19. Sc around. (26) 20. Dec by 2. (24) 21-24. Sc around. (24) 25. Dec by 1 and sc3. FO. Ss in black and dec by 1, finishing the round. (22) 26-27. Sc around. (22) 28. Sc3 and FO. Ss in white and finish the round. (22) 29. Sc around. (22) 30. Dec by 2. (20) 31-34. Sc around. (20) 35. Dec by 2. (18) 36-39. Sc around. (18) 40. Dec by 2. (16) 41-44. Sc around. (16) At this point, stuff the arm. 45. Sc2tog around. FO, leaving a long tail. (8)

Legs– in white, black (make 2)

1. In white, ch2 and sc6 into the second ch from hook. Mark. (6) 2-7. Inc by 6 to 42. (42) 8-13. Sc around. (42) 14. Dec by 2. (40) 15-16. Sc around. (40) 17. Dec by 2. (38) 18-19. Sc around. (38) 20. Dec by 2. (36) 21. Sc around. (36) 22. Sc3 and FO. Ss in black and finish round. (36) 23. Dec by 2. (34) 24-25. Sc around. (34) 26. Dec by 1, sc2 and FO. Ss in white, sc10, and dec by 1. Finish round. (32) 27-28. Sc around. (32) 29. Dec by 2. (30) 30-31. Sc around. (30) 32. Dec by 2. (28) 33-34. Sc around. (28) 35. Dec by 2. (26) 36-37. Sc around. (26) 38. Dec by 2. (24) 39-40. Sc around. (24) 41. Dec by 2. (22) 42-43. Sc around. (22) 44. Dec by 2. (20) 45-46. Sc around and FO, leaving a long tail. (20) Stuff firmly. Using the yarn needle and grey yarn, stitch in a grey line about 10-11 rows above the starting circle. This is meant to delineate feet.

Hair– in black

1. In black, ch2 and sc6 into the second ch from hook. Mark. (6) 2-9. Inc by 6 to 54. (54) 10. Sc around. (54) 11. Inc by 6. (60) 12. Sc around. (60) 13. Inc by 6. (66) 14. Sc around. (66) 15. Inc by 6. FO. (66) Turn the dome inside out, so the backs of the stitches are facing out. Ss into the last st made. 16. Working right back along the last row, (sc48 and ch1)*, turn. (48) 17-23. Rep from *, turning each time. FO. (48) 24. Ss in at 7 sc in from the end of the last row and sc to the same on the other side, turn. (36) 25-26. Sc36, turn. (36) 27. Dec by 2 across row, turn. (34) 28-29. Sc across, turn. (34) 30. Dec by 2 across row, turn. (32) 31-32. Sc across, turn. (32) 33. Dec by 6 across row, turn. (26) 34. Sc across, turn. (26) 35. Dec by 6 across row, turn. (20) 36. Sc across and FO. (20) Turn right-side-out again. At this point, attach all limbs and the head to the body with the tails from the body and limbs. Don’t attach the hair until the ears are done. Attach with the seams from white-black transitions on limbs facing up and out for the legs and to the back for the arms. These will be covered with armor embellishments.

EMBELLISHMENTS

Pauldrons– in 212th gold/orange (make 2)

1. In 212th gold/orange, ch2 and sc6 into the second ch from hook. Mark. (6) 2-5. Inc by 6 to 30 and FO, leaving a long tail. (30) Attach to the tops of the arms in the shoulder area. Tuck in ends.

Leg pads– in 212th gold/orange (make 2)

1. In 212th gold/orange, ch3 + 1 for turning. Turn. (3) 2. Inc by 1, sc1, inc by 1, turn. (5) 3. Sc across, turn. (5) 4. Inc by 1, sc3, inc by 1, turn. (7) 5-7. Sc across and turn. (7) 8. Dec by 1, sc3, dec by 1, turn. (5) 9. Sc across and turn. (5) 10. Dec by 1, sc1, dec by 1, FO, leaving a long tail. (3) Attach to the legs where the black meets white and vice-versa. Tuck in ends.

Handguards– in 212th gold/orange (make 2)

1. In 212th gold/orange, ch5 + 1 for turning. Turn. (5) 2. Sc across, turn. (5) 3. Inc by 1, sc3, inc by 1, turn. (7) 4. Sc across and turn. (7) 5. Sc across and FO, leaving a long tail. (7) Attach over the backs of the hands where black meets white. Tuck in ends.

Back panel– in 212th gold/orange (make 1)

1. In 212th gold/orange, sc10 + 1 to turn. Turn. (10) 2. Inc by 1, sc8, inc by 1, turn. (12) 3. Inc by 1, sc10, inc by 1, turn. (14) 4-8. Sc across and turn. (14) 9. Dec by 1, sc10, dec by 1, turn. (12) 10. Dec by 1, sc8, dec by 1, turn. FO, leaving a long tail. (10) Attach to the back where the belt stitching jumps a row. Tuck in ends.

Elbow pads– in 212th gold/orange (make 2)

1. In 212th gold/orange, sc2 + 1 for turning. Turn. (2) 2. Inc by 1, inc by 1, turn. (4) 3. Sc across and turn. (4) 4. Inc by 1, sc2, inc by 1, turn. (6) 5. Sc across and turn. (6) 6. Dec by 1, sc2, dec by 1, turn. (4) 7. Sc across and turn. (4) 8. Dec by 1, dec by 1 and FO, leaving a long tail. (2) Attach to the backs of the elbows where white meets black and vice-versa. Tuck in ends.

Ears– in adobe (make 2) – You want to make a half-circle

1. In adobe, ch2 and sc6 into the second ch from hook. Mark. (6) 2. Sc2 into the first 3 st of the round to make 6 st and ch1 to turn. Turn. (6) 3. (Inc by 1 + 1 sc) 3 times and FO, leaving a long tail. (9) Using the yarn needle, sew each ear onto either side of the lower half of the head, leaving room for the hair to go on. At this point, attach the hair. Using the yarn needle and grey yarn, stitch in grey stripes on Cody’s arms.

SUNBURST

Central ray– in 212th gold/orange (make 1)

1. Sc4 + 1 for tuning. (4) 2-10. Sc across, turn. FO, leaving a long tail. (4) Attach to the top of the grey shape on the chest, pointing up. Tuck in ends.

Side and bottom rays– in 212th gold/orange (make 3)

1. Sc4 + 1 for tuning. (4) 2-7. Sc across, turn. FO, leaving a long tail. (4) Attach to the sides and bottom of the grey shape. Tuck in ends.

Ray tops, for side rays– in 212th gold/orange (make 2)

1. Sc4 + 1 for tuning. (4) 2-3. Sc across, turn. FO, leaving a long tail. (4) Attach to the tops of the side rays, leaving a small white space between the top of the rays and the ray tops. Tuck in ends.

FACE

Eyes

Buttons: using a sewing needle, attach the buttons to the yarn stitches so that they form eyes.

Safety Eyes: if using safety eyes, attach as normal in the desired position.

Eyebrows

Using the yarn needle with black yarn, form the eyebrows. Cut the yarn and tie the ends together. Pull the yarn so that the knot in on the inside of the crochet and not facing out.

Scar

Using the yarn needle with dark brown yarn, stitch Cody’s scar in.

DIAGRAMS/PICTURES

#star wars #commander cody #marshal commander cody #cc 2224 #star wars the clone wars #the clone wars #swtcw #tcw #crochet #amigurumi #crochet doll #crochet pattern #beans art #considering making smaller trooper dolls but im likely to sell those patterns #this one is free though :)

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shatcey · 7 months

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START PAGE

I've written about myself here (in case you wanna know).

The meaning of the link colors is here.

I'm not a native speaker of either English or Japanese. I don't know Japanese at all, but I have my own ideas about how this language works, because I started learning Korean, and these languages have some similarities. Based on that, there may most likely be errors in my translations/posts. I use autotranslation and rewrite the text to a readable state. Some phrases are not clear to begin with, and I use my gut feeling and some experience of reading such poorly translated texts that have taught me to see meaning in them. My summaries are always full of my comments and jokes. If you prefer a clean translation, then you definitely won't like it.

So… you have every right not to trust my translations. I do them so that others can familiarize themselves with the events and main routes. Not in detail, but in general. I don't have enough knowledge for more.

There are several people who do full translations, and I am very grateful to them for what they do. This is an incredibly difficult job that requires a lot of time and concentration.

@/judesmoonbeauty @/kurishiri @/archiveikemen @/dear-mrs-otome @/dark-frosted-heart @/aishangotome @/otomehoneyybearr @/caffedrine @/aquagirl1978

Most likely, there are even more of them, I just haven't found them yet.

Currently reading (update 16/09/24):

IkePri (En): Lion seq ; IkePri (JP): Keith (on skip) IkeVil (En): Harrison ; IkeVil (JP): Ellis IkeSen (En): Kennyo IkeGen (JP): Yoshitsune

Ikemen Prince

Ikemen Villains (EN)

Ikemen Villains (JP)

Ikemen Sengoku

Ikemen Genjiden JP

Ikemen Vampire

Ikemen Revolution (archive)

Other games

Love and DeepSpace (archive)

VA jp (Zayne) VA kr (Xavier) VA kr (Rafayel) VA kr (Caleb)

birthday Xavier (heart rate) Zayne loves me

Mystic Messenger and Ssum (archive)

Ray April Fool's DLC Seven Pencil

Mugenro

Voiced teasers Prostitutes?

Dead games (RIP)

Comparison games

Wolfs Pets My heart on 11/11/23 Aggressively defensive Faces of the games Birthday presents Familiar backgrounds Sirius and Ibuki My fav smiles The same VA (how could it be?) Purple eyes Villain's logic Drama Princess Height Voice Why I like them (part 1) Final credits Alfons and Sebastian

Lesson of Japanese

...and grumbling

bad written story (Faust) time zones No luck (cards) That's just not fair (Jude) I don't love you, Gilbert Weekend plans Forget-me-nots Double Forget-me-nots tea Overwhelming Gilbert's card Free diamonds Cleaning

...and my scribblings

Alternative prologue IkeVamp: Prologue Picture

IkeVil: Bread Drawing lesson Innocent smile Lazy morning Vow The call of the moon

IkePri: The brave one Innocent Rose

Mixed: Husbands

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caught-on-tape-fest · 11 months

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Caught On Tape: A Carry On Podfest Masterlist

Caught On Tape is a podfic festival for fanfic related to Rainbow Rowell's Simon Snow Trilogy and Fangirl that runs October 29th to November 11th, 2023.

Listed below are all of the podfics posted so far for the fest! (You can find them on AO3 in our collection too.) Thank you so much to all of the wonderful creators who have participated and to the writers who volunteered their works to be podficced.

Rated G

[Podfic] Figure It Out (length: 3:22) read by @forabeatofadrum, written by @wellbelesbian

[Podfic] The Plum Tree (length: 6:21) read by @fatalfangirl, written by @otherpeoplesheartachept-2

[Podfic] Threads of Fate by Aristocratic_Otter (length 1:51:59) read by @caethes, written by @aristocratic-otter

Rated T

[Podfic] The Rise and Fall of Simon Snow Squeaksbury (length: 19:15) read by @youarenevertooold, written by @aroace-genderfluid-sheep

[Podfic] namesakes (length: 6:34) read by @forabeatofadrum, written by @tea-brigade

[Podfic] Crisp and Sweet (length: 22:00) read by @bookish-bogwitch, written by @mostlymaudlin

[Podfic] We Still Bloom (length 1:45:00) read by @hushed-chorus, written by @artsyunderstudy

[Podfic] A Prickly Disposition (length 11:56) read by @fatalfangirl, written by @you-remind-me-of-the-babe

[Podfic] A Restless Mind (Chapter 2 added) (length Ch 1 35:21, Ch 2 45:21) read by @cottagepodfics, written by @whatevertheweather

[Podfic] Worst Disney Princess Ever (length 54:28) read by @youarenevertooold, written by @hushed-chorus

[Podfic] Return to Sender (length 40:08) read by @spiri-a, writtenby @tea-brigade

[Podfic] Meet Me Under the Mistletoe (length 25:48) read by RattleandHum, written by @artsyunderstudy

[Podfic] Raining Cats and Dogs (Without the Cats) (length 32:23) read by @youarenevertooold, written by @whatevertheweather

[Podfic] This Is What We'll Tell Them (length 13:55) read by @captain-aralias, written by @mostlymaudlin

[Podfic] The Sound of Silence (length 49:00) read by @spiri-a, written by @captain-aralias

[Podfic] Petrichor (length 34:26) read by @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, written by @martsonmars

[Podfic] Tuesday (length 6:51) read by @freclface, written by @sillyunicorn

[Podfic] Light Me Up (length 37:28) read by @larkral, written by @mostlymaudlin

[Podfic] "Bro. You can just sleep with me." (length 7:13) read by @larkral, written by @mostlymaudlin

[Podfic] Bestie Status Achieved (length 12:14) read by @larkral, written by @mostlymaudlin

[Podfic] Who Cooks For You? (length 8:16) read by @karry-on, written by @sillyunicorn

[Podfic] 5 times agatha wellbelove should have realised she was a lesbian, and 1 time she did (length 14:35) read by @karry-on, written by @wellbelesbian

[Podfic] Flowers, Cake, and Filthy DMs (length 11:24) read by @iamamythologicalcreature, written by @you-remind-me-of-the-babe

[Podfic] Is This the Real Life? (length 42:52) read by @petrodobreva and @ivelovedhimthroughworse, written by @captain-aralias

[Podfic] Icarus (length 3:02) read by @forabeatofadrum, written by @mostlymaudlin

[Podfic] The Selkie and his Boy (length 2:07:00 spread over six chapters) read by @spiri-a, written by @hushed-chorus

[Podfic] Wielded by the Righteous by Maanorchidee (length 12:32) read by pectinouscube, written by @forabeatofadrum

Rated M

[Podfic] Sleeper Agents (length 13:31) read by @larkral, written by @mostlymaudlin

[Podfic] Shiver (length 43:48) read by theimpossibledemon, written by @captain-araliasand @facewithoutheart

[Podfic] Hold You Close Just Like a Photograph (length 20:05) read by @captain-aralias, written by @skeedelvee

Rated E

[Podfic] The Worst Chosen Ones (The "Let It Snow" Remix) (length 39:19) read by @bookish-bogwitch, written by @captain-aralias

[Podfic] Playing the Field (length 45:56) read by @cutestkilla, written by @fatalfangirl

#caught on tape fest 2023 #masterlist #carry on podfic #snowbaz podfic #carry on fanfiction #snowbaz fanfiction

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skankinator · 3 months

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Complications Ch. 1

Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw x FemReader

Author’s note: This is my first fanfic ever written. I hope you like it!

You grew up near a Navy base in San Diego and always dreamed of flying those jets you saw so often. You joined the military as soon as you turned eighteen. That was ten years and many stations ago. You’ve finally established yourself as a missions specialist after having to repeatedly prove yourself. Each mission you plan and execute takes you to a new destination. This one brought you back home.

The missions you specialize in are air operations. From the beginning of your career you made certain that you were the top in your class for everything, especially aviation. This quickly got you promoted to Top Gun where you spent a few years as an elite aviator. Your job has brought you to complete a mission with Top Gun’s Dagger Squadron.

You had files on each member of the squadron to study before arriving. You briefly looked over them on the flight over, only taking note of any information useful to the mission. You would have to teach them every aspect of your plan and train them to execute it perfectly, so you didn’t pay attention to little details.

You had a pre-furnished apartment ready for the time you would be posted in San Diego. You have little belongings from moving so frequently. You could fit your whole life into a couple of boxes. Traveling so frequently also made it difficult to maintain relationships, except your friendship with Stacie.

You texted your closest friend from high school that still lives in the area telling her that you had arrived. You didn’t expect an answer from her for a while. She works third shift at the 24/7 pharmacy, so she wouldn’t be awake for a few hours.

After arriving at the airport, you gathered your suitcases and took a taxi to the apartment. It wasn’t much. Just a one bedroom apartment with a small kitchen and living area. The furniture was rather plain and there were no decorations aside from a bowl on the coffee table full of potpourri.

You left your luggage unpacked and decided to leave your drab apartment. You got dinner at your favorite food truck, unsurprised that they are still in business. Best. Tacos. Ever. Feeling nostalgic, you decide to go to the bar in which you and your squadron spent most of your time.

The Hard Deck had not changed a bit. When you arrived the place was already swarming with people from the base. You made your way over to the bar where you were greeted by a familiar face.

“Y/N! I haven’t seen you in ages, what brings you back,” Penny said with a bright smile. One that reminded you of home.

“I’ve got a mission for a Top Gun squadron. How bad are they these days?” You question knowing Penny was the best person to ask about the cocky pilots.

“Not as bad as your class,” she said with a knowing look that brought a tinge of red to your cheeks. To be fair, you were once a hot shot pilot looking down on others from the high horse called Top Gun.

You spent many nights causing trouble at the Hard Deck. Penny had kicked your squad out on several occasions that ended with you sleeping in the sand. Some say your squad let a pelican into the bar and ordered it a beer. This cannot be confirmed nor denied by anyone. Alcohol conveniently has a way of messing with your memory.

“We had some good times,” you said to Penny as she handed you a beer and went to take orders from the very crowded bar. You sat and relaxed sipping on your beer while silently people watching. This was one of your favorite past times.

You saw people mingling with their cliques. Some in uniform some not, either way you could tell who was military or civilian. You end up focusing on a pool game happening across the bar. The group of friends/colleagues? were dressed in their khaki uniforms.

After a while, another joined the group. He wore a Hawaiian shirt that hugged his biceps and a pair of sunglasses that hid his eyes. His skin was kissed by the sun and damp with sweat. San Diego was hot this time of year. You opted for a white tank top and denim shorts that left just enough to the imagination.

You couldn’t help but stare at this stranger. You hadn’t noticed he was the center of your attention until he disappeared. You found yourself looking for him around the bar. Somewhere within the loud jumble of noise from the crowded bar came music. This wasn’t music from the jukebox, it was a piano.

You looked over and saw your mystery man sitting there beginning to play his heart out. Everyone around joined in singing and dancing to the song he played. You payed little attention to the music distracted by his strong arms expertly moving to the music. His long fingers delicately touching the keys. His neck muscles straining as he sang.

Oh shit. You’re really turned on by a really hot stranger. You haven’t exactly had your needs fulfilled since you broke up with your ex. Since then you busied yourself with work and left little time for dating. Of course, you don’t have to date a guy to have your needs met.

You didn’t notice the song end, but you had noticed a presence next to you. Your jaw nearly dropped when you saw the sexy stranger standing next to you. He was rather close thanks to the crowd. Penny and the other bar tenders were trying to get to everyone as quickly as they could, but you would rather them take their time. The stranger stood waiting to order another round.

“I haven’t seen you here before,” he said out of the blue. It took a moment for you to realize he was talking to you.

“I-I just flew in today,” you said cursing yourself. Really, that’s all you could muster up. It is hard to think of anything witty to say when you are lost in his smile.

“What brings you to San Diego? I hope it’s not a boyfriend,” he says deepening his voice for the second half. Oh my god is he flirting with me?!

“No boyfriend, just work. I am a… um new teacher. My first day is Monday,” you say putting on a flirtatious look. Technically you are not lying. But are here to teach fighter pilots, not school kids. In the past you have found that men can be run off by your high position in the military.

“Let me buy you a drink to start your school year out right,” we both laugh and look to the still very busy bartenders. We look back to each other. I wish he would take off those silly sunglasses. There is a short lull in the conversation before you pipe up.

“What about you?” You blurt out, just realizing he has been lead in the whole conversation. “What do you do?” His answer is not surprising. His look totally fits the part.

“I’m a pilot,” the way he says it doesn’t sound like a brag at all. He isn’t trying to show boat, instead he states it as fact nothing more.

“Lucky for you I quite like pilots,” your buzz from the three beers have finally taken over. You place your hand on his chest creeping up to his shoulder. He closes what little space is available and places a large hand respectfully low on your thigh.

You can tell he is waiting for you to make the first move. You lean up from your barstool and pull him down into a kiss. His lips are soft contrasting his prickly mustache.

The kiss doesn’t last as long as you would like. When you separate it is like time is frozen. There are no words between the two of you. You are both brought back to earth by a perfectly timed question.

“Can I get you anything?” Penny questions and you snap back to reality a bit flustered.

“I think we would like to close our tabs,” he says after clearing his throat. It’s like he read your mind. Penny looks to you and gives an approving smile and wink before turning to close the tabs.

Once everything is settled, you are making your way through the crowd with a warm hand on your lower back guiding you to the exit.

#bradley rooster bradshaw #top gun maverick #bradley rooster x reader #rooster x reader #top gun fanfiction #rooster top gun #bradley bradshaw #bradley bradshaw x reader #x reader #fem reader #x female reader #x fem!reader #fanfic #top gun fic

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crochetedblorbos · 4 months

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"Stay safe out there."

Character Name: Mistholme/The Audio Tour Guide

Fandom: @the-mistholme-museum [Podcast]

Voiced/Written By: Dom Guilfoyle

Yarn Used: Body: CraftSmart Value - Black Interface: CraftSmart Value - Heather Gray Voice: CraftSmart Value - Black Headphones: CraftSmart Value - Black

Basic pattern here.

Do you have any fucking idea how much it sucks wanting to hug something that not only literally but canonically doesn’t have a body? A lot.

Oh, my sweet, innocent, naive, trusting little Guide. Never lose that childlike wonder, no matter how much about the world you learn. And never lose your love of storytelling. I had hoped to finish Declan and the Guide before the finale of Mistholme, but I figure I finished close enough to the end that I can still ride that high. (Also, if you haven’t listened, go listen. Now. If you liked TMA’s format of “seemingly unconnected/only loosely connected stories that slowly coalesce into a coherent storyline that can, will, and must break your heart a thousand times over and have you begging for more”, you’ll love it.)

The Guide went through a lot of transformations over the course of the show, both in terms of personality and in terms of…existence, I guess. Without spoiling too terribly much, I rather got the impression at the beginning of the podcast that there were physical audio tour guides you would pick up at the entrance to the Mistholme Museum with the latest version of the Guide on them that you would then turn in before leaving, but by the end, you could—and frequently did—download the Guide directly to your phone. So how do you convey that as something you can give the hugs it so richly deserves and desperately needs?

This is a fun one to write up, because…well, for the most part, I didn’t vary the basic pattern. As mentioned, the Guide doesn’t have a body, but it does have a personality, so I just made a black, person-shaped void to be its “body”. Where it varies, though…is the head.

Interface: I wanted this to look like the display screen of an audio tour guide, so I stitched in the back loops only of the stitches forming a square where a person’s face would be beginning with R60 and ending on R71. Then I embroidered a sound wave onto it. Simple enough to describe. Surprisingly only slightly more difficult to execute.

Headphones: You’ve probably figured this out by now, but I will absolutely make my life as complicated as possible in order to avoid having to sew too many pieces together. I think these turned out pretty damn good, though! Pattern is as follows:

Earpiece 1:

R1: 6sc in magic circle, sl st in first sc (6 sc). R2: Ch 1, 2sc in each st around, sl st in first sc (12 sc). R3: Ch 1, [sc in first st, 2sc in next st] 6 times around, sl st in first sc (18 sc). R4: Ch 1, [sc in first two st, 2sc in next st] 6 times around, sl st in first sc (24 sc). R5: Ch 1, sc in first st, ch 2, skip next st, sc in next 23 st, sl st in first sc (23 sc, 2 ch). R6: Ch 1, sc in first st, sc in ch sp, [inv dec, sc in next 2 st] 5 times around, inv dec, sl st in first sc (18 sc). R6: Ch 1, [sc in back loop of first st, inv dec] 6 times around, sl st in first sc (12 sc). R7: Ch 1, inv dec 6 times around, sl st in first st (6 sc).

Sl st up to ch sp.

Headband:

R8: Ch 1, 2sc in ch sp, sc in next 4 st around gap, sl st in first sc (6 sc). R9-17: Ch 1, sc in each st around, sl st in first sc (6 sc). R18-22: Ch 1, sc in first two st, hdc in next st, dc in next two st, hdc in next st, sl st in first sc (2 sc, 2 hdc, 2 dc). R23-27: Ch 2, hdc in each st around, sl st in first hdc (6 hdc). R28-32: Ch 1, sc in first two st, hdc in next st, dc in next two st, hdc in next st, sl sti n first sc (2sc, 2hdc, 2dc). R33-42: Ch 1, sc in each st around, sl st in first sc (6 sc). Fasten off.

Earpiece 2:

R1: 6sc in magic circle, sl st in first sc (6 sc). R2: Ch 1, 2sc in each st around, sl st in first sc (12 sc). R3: Ch 1, [sc in first st, 2sc in next st] 6 times around, sl st in first sc (18 sc). R4: Ch 1, [sc in first two st, 2sc in next st] 6 times around, sl st in first sc (24 sc). R5: Ch 1, sc in first st, ch 2, skip next st, sc in next 23 st, sl st in first sc (23 sc, 2 ch). R6: Ch 1, sc through first st and first st of end of headband, sc through ch sp and second st of end of headband, inv dec through end of headband, [sc in next two st, inv dec] five times around, sl st in first sc through end of headband if necessary (18 sc). R7: Ch 1, [sc in back loop of first st, inv dec] 6 times around, sl st in first sc (12 sc). R8: Ch 1, inv dec 6 times around, sl st in first st (6 sc).

Sl st down to bottom of headpiece.

Cord: Ch 34. Sc in 2nd ch from hook, sc in next 5 ch, sl st into next ch, turn. Sc in back of ch 6 times, sl st in first sc. Ch to desired length.

Join to head next to interface.

#blorbo from my shows #crocheting #the mistholme museum of mystery morbidity and mortality #audio tour guide #mistholme guide #I'm so happy with him you have no idea

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inevitably-johnlocked · 5 months

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Five Fics Friday: April 19/24

Happy Friday everyone! Check out today's selection of fics to get you through the weekend! And be sure to give the boosted fic some extra love, as it JUST finished being written! :D Enjoy!!

SIGNAL BOOSTING

The Curious Case of the Casablanca Killer by meet_me_in_samarra (G, 55,886 w., 16 Ch. || Post THoB, Case Fic, Bromance / Friendship, Clever John, John is a Conductor of Light, BAMF John / Sherlock, Sassy John, Cheeky Sherlock) – Deemed a three at best, the case of an invisible burglar in a historic cinema who stole nothing only caught Sherlock’s attention because he was bored. Also, he wanted to do John a favour. In the end, this proved to be a real stroke of luck. Otherwise, Sherlock would have missed an intriguing mystery that quickly ramped up in complexity.

RECENT MFLs

Licence to Kiss by fellshish (T, 13,740 w., 4 Ch. || Post-ASiB, Bond Jokes, Angst and Humour, First Kiss, Bed Sharing, Love Confessions, Mutual Pining) – John loves James Bond. For his Birthday, Sherlock decides to organise a spy adventure. Sherlock begs Mycroft for a real case with some extra gadgets. And perhaps some actors pretending to be criminals. What could possibly go wrong?

Guess Who's Coming for Christmas Dinner by Raina_at (E, 18,623+ w., 2/4 Ch. || WiP || University AU || Fake / Pretend Relationship, Accidental Fake Dating, , Oblivious John / Sherlock, Mistaken for Being in a Relationship, Christmas, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Alcohol, Past Drug Use, Not-Nice Holmes Family) – Sherlock hates spending Christmas with his snobby parents. John has nowhere to go over the holidays. The heat in 221B is broken and their fridge is empty. Plus, Sherlock's parents will hate John. So of course Sherlock takes John along. It's not his fault that his parents assume John's his boyfriend. Of course John is perfect and all, but Sherlock doesn't do romance. So what harm can there be in pretending, if it makes his parents this mad?

Only Yesterday by Berty (T, 43,378+ w., 17/18 Ch. || Alternate Timelines / 'Yesterday' AU || Post-TRF, POV John, Grief, Mental Instability, Angst, Unrequited Love, Suspense, Scotland, Hurt John, Developing Relationship, Doctor John, John is a Mess) – Sherlock has been gone for two years and John Watson is doing okay. He goes to work. He sleeps (sometimes). He eats. He has colleagues, some of whom are even friends. He has purpose. If it's not a life as others might view it, it's a fair approximation. It's fine. He's fine. One night the lights go out and when they come back on everything is the same except for one important thing. For John it's theÂ mostÂ important thing. And suddenly John is not fine at all.

RECENTLY BOOKMARKED LOKIUS FICS

Magic Like You by Anonymous (NR [M], 9,714 w., 5 Ch. || LOKI SERIES || Post-S2, Light Angst, Soft, Friends to Lovers, Jotunn Loki, Pining Loki, Heavy Pining, Bed Sharing, Jealous Loki, POV Loki, Living Together, First Kiss/Time) – Loki and Mobius are trying to carve out a new life for themselves after all the chaos and hurt and destruction that was caused by the TVA. This story explores Loki's new life and his relationship to Mobius through magic. (With lots of stupid fun and soft moments along the way, because with these two, it's inevitable.)

#johnlock fic recs #lokius fic recs #my fic recs #five fics friday

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mostlysignssomeportents · 1 year

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Google makes millions on paid abortion disinformation

Google’s search quality has been in steady decline for years, and Google assures us that they’re working on it, though the most visible effort is replacing links to webpages with lengthy, florid paragraphs written by a confident habitual liar chatbot:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/16/tweedledumber/#easily-spooked

The internet is increasingly full of garbage, much of it written by other confident habitual liar chatbots, which are now extruding plausible sentences at enormous scale. Future confident habitual liar chatbots will be trained on the output of these confident liar chatbots, producing Jathan Sadowski’s “Habsburg AI”:

https://twitter.com/jathansadowski/status/1625245803211272194

But the declining quality of Google Search isn’t merely a function of chatbot overload. For many years, Google’s local business listings have been terrible. Anyone who’s tried to find a handyman, a locksmith, an emergency tow, or other small businessperson has discovered that Google is worse than useless for this. Try to search for that locksmith on the corner that you pass every day? You won’t find them — but you will find a fake locksmith service that will dispatch an unqualified, fumble-fingered guy with a drill and a knockoff lock, who will drill out your lock, replace it with one made of bubblegum and spit, and charge you 400% the going rate (and then maybe come back to rob you):

https://www.nytimes.com/2016/01/31/business/fake-online-locksmiths-may-be-out-to-pick-your-pocket-too.html

Google is clearly losing the fraud/spam wars, which is pretty awful, given that they have spent billions to put every other search engine out of business. They spend $45b every year to secure exclusivity deals that prevent people from discovering or using rivals — that’s like buying a whole Twitter every year, just so they don’t have to compete:

https://www.thebignewsletter.com/p/how-a-google-antitrust-case-could/

But there’s an even worse form of fraudulent listing on Google, one they could do something about, but choose not to: ad-fraud. For all the money and energy thrown into “dark SEO” to trick Google into putting your shitty, scammy website at the top of the listings, there’s a much simpler method. All you need to do is pay Google — buy an ad, and your obviously fraudulent site will be right there, at the top of the search results.

There are so many top searches that go to fraud or malware sites. Tech support is a favorite. It’s not uncommon to search for tech support for Google products and be served a fake tech-support website where a scammer will try to trick you into installing a remote-access trojan and then steal everything you have, and/or take blackmail photos of you with your webcam:

https://www.bleepingcomputer.com/news/security/google-search-ads-infiltrated-again-by-tech-support-scams/

This is true even when Google has a trivial means of reliably detecting fraud. Take the restaurant monster-in-the-middle scam: a scammer clones the menu of a restaurant, marking up their prices by 15%, and then buys the top ad slot for searches for that restaurant. Search for the restaurant, click the top link, and land on a lookalike site. The scammer collects your order, bills your card, then places the same order, in your name, with the restaurant.

The thing is, Google runs these ads even for restaurants that are verified merchants — Google mails the restaurant a postcard with a unique number on it, and the restaurant owner keys that number in to verify that they are who they say they are. It would not be hard for Google to check whether an ad for a business matches one of its verified merchants, and, if so, whether the email address is a different one from the verified one on file. If so, Google could just email the verified address with a “Please confirm that you’re trying to buy an ad for a website other than the one we have on file” message:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/02/24/passive-income/#swiss-cheese-security

Google doesn’t do this. Instead, they accept — and make a fortune from — paid disinformation, across every category.

But not all categories of paid disinformation are equally bad: it’s one thing to pay a 15% surcharge on a takeout meal, but there’s a whole universe of paid medical disinformation that Google knows about and has an official policy of tolerating.

This paid medical disinformation comes from “crisis pregnancy centers”: these are fake abortion clinics that raise huge sums from religious fanatics to buy ads that show up for people seeking information about procuring an abortion. If they are duped by one of these ads, they are directed to a Big Con-style storefront staffed by people who pretend that they perform abortions, but who bombard their marks with falsehoods about health complications.

These con artists try to trick their marks into consenting to sexual assault — a transvaginal ultrasound. This is a prelude to another fraud, in which the “sporadic electrical impulses” generated by an early fetal structure is a “heartbeat” (early fetuses do not have hearts, so they cannot produce heartbeats):

https://www.nbcnews.com/health/womens-health/heartbeat-bills-called-fetal-heartbeat-six-weeks-pregnancy-rcna24435

If the victim still insists on getting an abortion, the fraudsters will use deceptive tactics to draw out the process until they run out the clock for a legal abortion, procuring a forced birth through deceit.

It is hard to imagine a less ethical course of conduct. Google’s policy of accepting “crisis pregnancy center” ads is the moral equivalent of taking money from fake oncologists who counsel people with cancer to forego chemotherapy in favor of juice-cleanses.

There is no ambiguity here: the purpose of a “crisis prengancy center” is to deceive people seeking abortions into thinking they are dealing with an abortion clinic, and then further deceive them into foregoing the abortion, by means of lies, sexually invasive and unnecessary medical procedures, and delaying tactics.

Now, a new report from the Center for Countering Digital Hate finds that Google made $10m last year on ads from “crisis pregnancy centers”:

https://www.wired.com/story/google-made-millions-from-ads-for-fake-abortion-clinics/

Many of these “crisis pregnancy centers” are also registered 501(c)3 charities, which makes them eligible for Google’s ad grants, which provide free ads to nonprofits. Marketers who cater to “crisis pregnancy center” advertise that they can help their clients qualify for these grants. In 2019, Google was caught giving tens of thousands of dollars’ worth of free ads to “crisis pregnancy centers”:

https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2019/may/12/google-advertising-abortion-obria

The keywords that “crisis pregnancy centers” bid up include “Planned Parenthood” — meaning that if actual Planned Parenthood clinics want to appear at the top of the search for “planned parenthood,” they have to outbid the fraudsters seeking to deceive Planned Parenthood patients.

Google has an official policy of requiring customers that pay for ads matching abortion-related search terms to label their ads to state whether or not they provide abortions, but the report documents failures to enforce this policy. The labels themselves are confusing: for example, abortion travel funds have to be labeled as “not providing abortions.”

Google isn’t afraid to ban whole categories of advertising: for example, Google has banned Plan C, a nonprofit that provides information about medication abortions. The company erroneously classes Plan C as an “unauthorized pharmacy.” But Google continues to offer paid disinformation on behalf of forced birth groups that claim there is such a thing as “abortion reversal” (there isn’t — but the “abortion reversal” drug cocktail is potentially lethal).

This is inexcusable, but it’s not unique — and it’s not even that profitable. $10m is a drop in the bucket for a company like Google. When you’re lighting $45b/year on fire just to prevent competition, $10m is chump change. A better way to understand Google’s relationship to paid disinformation can be found by studying Facebook’s own paid disinformation problem.

Facebook has a well-documented problem with paid political disinformation — unambiguous, illegal materials, like paid notices advising people to remember to vote on November 6th (when election day falls on November 5th). The company eventually promised to put political ads in a repository where they could be inspected by all parties to track its progress in blocking paid disinformation.

Facebook did a terrible job at this, with huge slices of its political ads never landing in its transparency portal. We know this because independent researchers at NYU’s engineering school built an independent, crowdsourced tracker called Ad Observer, which scraped all the ads volunteers saw and uploaded them to a portal called Ad Observatory.

Facebook viciously attacked the NYU project, falsely smearing it as a privacy risk (the plugin was open source and was independently audited by Mozilla researchers, who confirmed that it didn’t collect any personal information). When that didn’t work, they sent a stream of legal threats, claiming that NYU was trafficking in a “circumvention device” as defined by Section 1201 of the Digital Millennium Copyright Act, a felony carrying a five-year prison sentence and a $500k fine — for a first offense.

Eventually, NYU folded the project. Facebook, meanwhile, has fired or reassigned most of the staff who work on political ad transparency:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/08/06/get-you-coming-and-going/#potemkin-research-program

What are we to make of this? Facebook claims that it doesn’t need or want political ad revenue, which are a drop in the bucket and cause all kinds of headaches. That’s likely true — but Facebook’s aversion to blocking political ads doesn’t extend to spending a lot of money to keep paid political disinfo off the platform.

The company could turn up the sensitivity on its blocking algorithm, which would generate more false positives, in which nonpolitical ads are misidentified and have to be reviewed by humans. This is expensive, and it’s an expense Facebook can avoid if it can suppress information about its failures to block paid political disinformation. It’s cheaper to silence critics than it is to address their criticism.

I don’t think Google gives a shit about the $10m it gets from predatory fake abortion clinics. But I think the company believes that the PR trouble it would get into for blocking them — and the expense it would incur in trying to catch and block fake abortion clinic ads — are real liabilities. In other words, it’s not about the $10m it would lose by blocking the ads — Google wants to avoid the political heat it would take from forced birth fanatics and cost of the human reviewers who would have to double-check rejected ads.

In other words, Google doesn’t abet fraudulent abortion clinics because they share the depraved sadism of the people who run these clinics. Rather, Google teams up with these sadists out of cowardice and greed.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this thread to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/06/15/paid-medical-disinformation/#crisis-pregnancy-centers

[Image ID: A ruined streetscene. Atop a pile of rubble sits a dilapidated shack. In front of the shack is a letterboard with the word ABORTIONS set off-center and crooked. In the foreground is a carny barker at a podium, gesturing at the sign and the shack. The barker's head and face have been replaced with the Google logo. Within the barker's podium is a heap of US$100 bills.]

Image: Flying Logos (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Over_$1,000,000_dollars_in_USD_$100_bill_stacks.png

CC BY-SA 4.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/deed.en

#pluralistic #abortion clinics #forced birth #disinformation #medical disinformation #paid disinformation #google #google ads #ad-tech #seo #kiin thai #locksmiths #abortion #dobbs crisis pregnancy centers #roe v wade

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