#// but this didnt actually change what i had already written too much?

[savannahsdeath]

hiii i love ur fics ive read them all i ws wondering if you could like do a 18+ with a extremely jealous ellie??

thank you sm ily😭💞and yes ofc i tried my best!!

JEALOUS!ELLIE WILLIAMS X READER

mdni please<3

summary: els didnt like some of the messages she found on your phone..

warnings: 18+!! smut, jealousy(obv), language

writers note: sorry it took me so long to post it😓ive actually written it like one day after you requested but i had already some posts planned and i didnt want to change everything now💔

You came back after a meeting with your co-workers to see your girlfriend waiting for you. As soon as she heard the door open, she leaned on the doorframe of the living room, looking at you with an undefined expression.

"You're late." She mumbled, her voice sounding mad but the way she planted wet little kisses all over your face said otherwise.

Ellie's closeness wasn't just out of greeting, but out of an act of possessiveness and jealousy that you grew accustomed to in the relationship.

You sighed and looked at Ellie for a second, before saying, "Yeah, I'm late. Sorry." You gave her a quick kiss too while looking for your keys. "Meeting ended late." Your voice wasn't as cheery as it usually is.

Ellie then rolled her eyes. "Did you really had to stay that long?" She muttered loudly, trying to hide the jealousy that was so clearly showing.

"It was important." You said, finding your keys and pulling them out of your pockets. You didn't sound upset because it was hard to be upset with Ellie. She was like a little kitten who was possessive and needy at times, but still oh so sweet.

Ellie rolled her eyes again but smiled, and she leaned onto you with her arms wrapped around your waist in a hug. This was where you felt safe and home.

"C'mon," she said softly, "let's go to bed."

You nodded. "I'll just go to the bathroom, 'kay?" You asked, giving her your bag, like you always did after work - she'll lug it upstairs for you.

"Of course, darling." Ellie smiled as she took the bag from you, her expression now fully warm and affectionate. You were lucky to have her, and you knew that.

You went to the bathroom and started to wash your face and brush your teeth, taking a moment to yourself.

After a few minutes, and a good splash of cold water on your face, you exited the bathroom and made your way upstairs. Ellie was waiting for you in the bedroom.

She was doing something on your phone, which didn't surprise you - she was probably just going through your gallery, staring at your pics. You had nothing to hide anyway.

She often did that, smiling widely and mumbling things like 'my wife's so pretty'.

This time, though, she was silent and had a frown on her face.

"Who's Steve?" She asked when she saw you.

"I don't know." You answered honestly. You had no idea who is she talking about, probably a random boy following you.

"You two texted." She passed your phone to you with an opened short conversation. He replied to your story, complimenting you, you thanked him, that's all.

"Yeah, I remember now. What about him?" You lied down next to her, curiously staring at the screen, expecting some more messages to magically appear and explain the situation.

Ellie sat on top of you, playing with the hem of your shirt. "He's hitting on you." She said as she got more bold, now not only fingers but her whole hands sliding up and down your waist.

"I don't know him. He just texted me once." You shrugged, reading the conversation over and over again to find which part made your girlfriend act like that.

"Yeah, and what does his text say?" She smirked, not in her usual innocent way, but in a 'think twice before you answer' way.

You scrolled to his first message and read it out loud. It was simple "stunning💞" in a reply to your story - a photo Ellie took of you at the beach a week ago but you forgot to post it before.

"Exactly. Now, what are you wearing on that pic?" Her smirk widened as she started to undo the button of your jeans.

You didn't pay much attention to her moves, focusing on her orders. "A swimsuit. I mean, we were at th-"

She shushed you, pressing her lips against yours. She pulled away after a good minute, leaving you breathless. She forced the phone, which slipped off of your embrace while she kissed you, back between your fingers.

"Stop explaining yourself or I'll think you actually have something to explain. For now, I'm just asking simple questions. Do I look like I'm mad?" She held your chin with one of her hands, while the other was unbuttoning your formal-looking work shirt.

She really didn't look mad, but you knew it's just her ability to camouflage.

You let out a relieved sigh as soon as you catched your breath. "Oh. Right. Look, it's not a big deal, I told him I'm-"

"Busy. Yeah, I know." She cut you off. "Pretty pathetic excuse."

"What was I supposed to say?" You barely managed to say as she started tracing a path of messy, wet kisses from your neck down your body.

"Are you seriously asking me that?" She laughed and you could feel the vibrations in her breath caused by her sudden outburst on your stomach, right were she stopped to answer you.

You stayed quiet, not wanting to make it worse or seem even dumber in her eyes than you already do, if that's even possible. She noticed your confusion and didn't pressure you to read her mind.

"That you have a girlfriend. That she told you to post it. That she took this pic." She made a pause after every sentence to cling her tongue, followed quickly after with her mouth, to your core, watching your body slightly squirm. You didn't even realize when she arrived that low, and when she took off your underwear, but that wasn't important anymore. "That it was her idea to go to the beach. That she helped you pick your swimsuit. That she saw you in it first..."

"Els... Stop..." You moaned out, feeling jealous of how unbothered she looks while you were already soaking.

"Stop what?" She laughed, sucking on your clit while taking off her rings.

This simple, two-words question, turned out to be more difficult to answer than you'd thought. Actually, what did you had in mind while telling her to stop? Hers 'that she...' calculations? Her hand placement, which had a bruising grip on your thighs? Or her tongue, that had definitely affected you the most, making you drop the phone, screen-down on the bed, and hopefully hold into the bed sheets?

"That's what I thought." She said before you could think of a correct answer.

She had a whole scolding prepared in her mind, but you wasn't honoured to hear it as she had a better plan. Still, she wanted to talk to you through it, watching you do your best to answer or just understand her while she makes you look and feel like a total mess. In order to not leave your cunt hopelessly tremble, right after she took her tongue off of your clit, she pushed two fingers into your entrance.

You gasped, squeezing your thighs together, which made Ellie laugh. It was a normal reaction - her move was unexpected - but your eyes rolling back always got a reaction out of her.

"Back to the topic, want to tell me why you decided saying 'you're busy' will work?" She smirked, her fingers pumping in and out, clenching and unclenching, in a painfully fast and rough way. Her thumb rubbed your clit, replacing her tongue.

"I... If I-'d" You stuttered, taking a deep breath after every letter you managed to say.

"Y-Y...You what?" She mocked your mumbling, her smirk turning into a smile.

Your back arched, making your hips move higher, but Ellie held them down with her free arm. Even though her nails were trimmed short, so she won't have to worry she'll hurt your pretty cunt, you swore you feel them digging into your waist.

"That hurt-s..." You whispered, but you weren't really bothered by it, even though your eyes were starting to get teary.

"Yeah? Don't worry, I'm sure Steve would make it hurt more... if you'd give him a chance, that is. But you didn't and won't." Her free hand let go of your hip, taking your phone and staring at the unlocked screen, clearly thinking or considering something. "I know you're mine and you know that too." She finally concluded, but right before she put the device down, you got a notification.

She mischievously smiled as she saw who's the message from.

"You got yourself a fan." She laughed as she opened your conversation with the reason of her jealous behaviour. "'Still busy?' and a fucking winking emoji. Jesus, that's just embarrasing."

You couldn't help but admire how good her attention span was - one hand making you a whining mess, other typing on your phone, eyes barely looking away from you (only to read his text, she typed hers blindly), mind probably racing with ideas to make him, or you, or both of you, regret your little conversation. She was obviously overreacting, but then again, your profile was full of Ellie and there's no way he missed all the cute posts about her.

"Should I show him how 'stunning' you look right now?" She chuckled and shook her head. "Nah, this view is for me only."

"What d-id you do?" You stuttered, trying to take your phone back, but she placed it out of your reach and aggressively grabbed your wrist.

"I liked it more when you moaned instead of asking questions." And just as she said that, she got faster again, making your cunt tighten even more around her fingers. Even though it may seem she's not paying much attention to how precise she is, she kept violating your sensitive spot, not missing it once.

Your head hit the pillow, leaning back on it and exposing your throat from which many signs of your pleasure came.

She was wondering again, her eyes looking you up and down before finally staying at your face. Her smile faded as she looked at you for a few moments. Then, she picked up your phone and passed it to you, following by simple but stern words; "Block him."

Your hands were shaky, so instead of pressing the block button, you almost accidentally called him a few times.

Ellie's smirk came back as she looked at you obediently fulfill her requests. She knew she could make you do anything she wanted now, but she didn't feel the need to. The only thing she needed was you with her - her only.

She took the mobile from you, whispering soft 'good girl' as she saw you succeed to do what she asked you to.

"Next time, if someone bothers you, just tell me straight away." She patted your cheek, her focus going back to what's her right hand doing.

This boy didn't bother you at all, he was just nice. But you knew what Ellie meant - he bothered her. Without arguing, you silently nodded, knowing this is the last time you posted a swimsuit photo on your account.

[versadies]

next time (alhaitham x gn!reader)

SALUTATIONS. next time

ADDRESSED. alhaitham (w/gn!reader)

STAMP. in which you feel distant from your lover, who busied himself with the akademiya for reasons you’re unsure of until it’s too late. (loosely based on tightrope from the greatest showman)

CONTENT. angst/no-comfort, spoilers to sumeru archon quest (3.2), neglect, hint of kidnapping, hint of violence, azar is a bad person as always, grammar errors, ooc!alhaitham (this was written b4 3.4 was released)

POST-SCRIPT. alhaitham didnt come home so i decided to post this questionable fic and prolly plan to make a series about him out of pure pettiness. enjoy. (will make a part two soon and its him groveling <33)

LINKS. masterlist \ taglist \ part two

How long has it been since you’ve last been with your lover?

You could hardly recall, and you’re afraid to admit that you’ve given up trying to. Despite residing in Alhaitham’s place for months, it feels as if there’s a wall between you two.

Whether or not it’s Alhaitham’s wall or yours, you could not find a hammer to break it.

It started a month ago – you feel a bit saddened when you realized how long this went on – when he started acting weird.

He started being a little late than usual, staying in his office all day until he realizes that it’s 3 am or such, would only hum in response whenever you say “I love you” to him, refusing to come to bed until he’s done with his work in his office, only taking a few bites of his breakfast that you took time and effort to make for him before rushing out to go to the Akademiya — sometimes he wouldn’t even say his farewells to you — and come back for only Celestia knows when,

And the very thing you noticed most from this recent change: he stopped reaching out to you.

Of course, he’s willing to talk to you when you speak to him first, but his responses were rather short and swift, as though he wanted to get this conversation to be over and do other things.

When you asked Alhaitham why he’s always away these days, he claims he’s been in the Akademiya fixing something, and that was the end of your conversation.

You knew he was lying though.

In reality, he hasn’t actually been as in touch with the Akademiya as he was before due to a “mission” assigned to him by the Grand Sage, something you found out from the General Mahamatra, Cyno.

You understand that your lover had to keep secrets from you as some of his business with the Akademiya are confidential, but you just wished that he took the time to reassure you that this is just him being busy and not something that will go on forever.

“I’ll see you later.” He says, standing up from his seat before coming towards the front door without as much as a goodbye kiss. He always made sure to give you a kiss before he leaves, he claims it’s good luck.

You didn’t utter a response to him, nor did you bother finishing your meal anymore. It seems you’ve lost your touch if you could no longer find yourself eating your favorite dish that you’ve loved for so long.

You’re thankful Kaveh, your dearest best friend and your lover’s roommate, is away in the Akademiya at the moment. If he were still here eating breakfast with you at this very moment, he would’ve noticed the way your form has been trembling ever so slightly from thinking too much of what’s going on between your relationship.

You could already imagine what he’d say if he were here.

“What did that brainless buffoon do again?” Kaveh would say in an angry tone, yet his eyes show concern towards you. “Just say the word and he’ll have to deal with me, I got you.”

Nothing, you’d say. He’s just… far.

So far, so out of reach.

You always tell yourself that Alhaitham’s simply just too busy from his projects in the Akademiya these days – he’s the Scribe after all – but this is Alhaitham, the same man who you’ve worked out with about making time for your relationship and each other’s works, the same man who’d always spare time for you even when he’s as busy as he can be and the one who would always hear you out when you call for him.

He’s a man of many things, but never one who’d ignore his own lover and act as though they’re nothing but a stranger — not without warning in advance about it, that is (which never happened at all, mind you).

You then thought that you must’ve said something that upsets him, but you could hardly recall the last time the two of you had a conflict, nor could you recall what you said that could have offended him. Besides that, he wasn’t one to ignore you for such a reason.

So… what was it? What was the one thing that made your relationship as it is now?

Was it… you?

You accidentally let go of the plate you’re washing as a result of that thought, the sound causes your thoughts to cease for just a moment.

Surely, if there really was something wrong, he’d tell you… right?

You then decided that it’s time for you to try and reach out to him once more and hope that this time he’d listen to you.

The day was nothing but a blur, and fortunate enough, your lover came home early for the first time just as you were about to lie down on your shared bed.

“Alhaitham…?” You called out his name softly, looking at the doorway to see him. “You’re home..”

He glances at your way with an unexplainable look on his face. “Were you expecting me?”

You started fidgeting your fingers nervously. “Can we… Can we talk?” Just this once, please talk to me.

He opens his mouth to say something but immediately stops himself.

“…” He thinks for a moment.

Just as you’re about to ask if there’s something bothering him, he lets out a sigh and turns away from your direction.

“Let’s talk about it next time when I’m… done with my work.”

Your eyes widens for a bit, wanting to ask him to stay–

But he’s busy… He’s too busy with matters that are more important than you. You thought to yourself bitterly, stopping yourself from reaching out to him once more.

There’s always next time… Whenever that may be.

“...Very well. Goodnight, Alhaitham.” You said quietly, tucking yourself in your bed as your back faces his direction. You didn’t notice how he finally looked back at you with a longing look on his face, only to walk away towards his office without another word.

Next time ( Name ). Alhaitham thought with a soft sigh. I’ll come back to you as soon as I get rid of the Akademiya’s schemes.

He just needs time to execute said plan.

–

Currently, everything goes according to plan.

Soon enough, Lesser Lord Kusanali will be free and ( Name ) can be safe when Azar gets punished. Alhaitham thought as Azar continued on talking about how he knew Alhaitham’s plan all along.

“...Heh, you'll see me as a traitor regardless of what I say, no?” The scribe said, crossing his arms. “Even if you impugned me, it would have little effect on you all.”

Azar shakes his head. “You misunderstand. Losing our Scribe would irreparably damage the Akademiya's regular operations and the development of Sumeru's future academic systems…” Something flashes through the Grand Sage’s eyes, his lips twitching upwards. “For that reason, it’s for the best if someone does it on your behalf.”

The scribe almost lost his breath for a second.

He narrowed his eyes. “And what exactly are you implying?”

Azar lets out an amused huff. “You know exactly what I’m implying, scribe.”

The scribe dared not to think of the worst, until the next words that left the Grand Sage’s mouth almost made his facade falter.

“Your lover is quite an exceptional person and fought well for someone who doesn’t wield a vision, but it was all for naught it seems.” He can’t help but chuckle to himself. “It’s just a shame that they have to pay the price for your betrayal.”

“Lover? You have a lover, Alhaitham?” Paimon whispered, shocked at the turn of events. This wasn’t a part of the plan at all!

Meanwhile, Alhaitham slowly starts regretting not taking you with him from the beginning. He should’ve been more attentive, he should’ve warned you about the Akademiya instead of being so focused on the plan to the point where he’s basically neglecting you, he should’ve taken you to Aaru Village instead of leaving you–!

It was only then when Alhaitham realized his mistake.

This mistake isn’t something that’s from the mission, but it involves something that’s more important than this plan,

He made the mistake of unintentionally neglecting you.

Suddenly, he remembers his last conversation with you.

You started fidgeting your fingers nervously. “Can we… Can we talk?”

He opens his mouth to say something but immediately stops himself. He wanted nothing more than to drop everything and listen to what you have to say, but he knew he needed to prioritize the mission to save Lesser Lord Kusanali, not when he has to go back to Aaru Village to talk about the plan with everyone tomorrow.

He lets out a sigh and turns away from your direction. “Let’s talk about it next time when I’m… done with my work.”

If only he knew there wasn’t a next time after that.

Alhaitham tries to compose himself. “You said that I betrayed the Akademiya, but you, Azar... You've betrayed all of Sumeru, betrayed its archon!” He said.

Just you wait, ( Name ). I will make up everything once I come for you, wherever you may be.

Azar remains composed. “Hmph, so flight has turned to fight at long last. Guards!”

The scribe notices how all the guards position themselves, pointing their weapons at him and his allies. He just needs to finish this swiftly so he’ll be able to focus on finding you.

He lets out a deep breath before he begins the next phase of his plan.

I just need to deal with those who dared to lay a hand on you before I find you, ( Name ).

part two

PENPALS. @scaraslover @saving-for-xiao @dawgimsohot @kazu-topia @chiruru @aqualesha @renamichii @mrkamisato @shenhesl0ver @serami00 @serenareiss @hiqhkey @emperatris-rinaka @bystander36 @irisxiel @ladycoleigh @034ven @dear-dairiess @owozi8 @hadesaedes @chiro-chiro-kun @hersscherofyatta @mariusvonhangme @yuzuricebun @hoshikistarlette @solaaresque @crowbird @lordbugs @flowersforayato @headintheclouddd @estelwrld @giyusimpsassemble @irethepotatosblog @moonlightaangel @alice0blog @shotosbrainrot @sniffoat @chihawari @mxsomn @kuni-kuzushii @jiminscarmex @mitsukii14 @nejibot @ylimeprive @sachispet @loreleis-world @sn-owo @starforecasts @someonetookmynamelmao @ceylestia @astrequa @ymikkos @reallysporadicarcade @melodyyamino @dudufodd @somberrock @yevenly @lemontum @nghing

[hearts-4-vicky]

ꜱᴏᴍᴇᴛʜɪɴɢ ꜱᴛᴜᴘɪᴅ ✧

ahn yujin

warnings: angst , (might be shitty tho cuz ive never written angst b4..) swearing.., lots of dialogue holy shit they yap a lot, aouad au, major character death(s) , yujins a FUCKING loser, unrequited love kinda.., blood n other nasty stuff so bewareeee if you’re sensitive to that kind of stuff🫡

wc: 1.3k (woah)

hi m like sad rn so yeah yay mwah😘

“yujin”

“yn”

the two of you found yourselves star gazing on the rooftop, using it as an escape from the cruel reality you were living in

“do you think this will ever go back to normal?”

the girl paused, not wanting to demolish any sliver of hope you had left in your bruised body

“of course i do.. why? you doubting me?”

yujin playfully pouted at you, poking at your thigh

“huh? what- no. . I trust you”

an awkward silence developed between you two

“hey” yujin started

you looked towards her, waiting for her to continue

“m sorry bout earlier. . i didnt-“

you socked her in the arm.

“HOLY SHIT what the actual FUCK.”

the girl started to complain, though it fell upon deaf ears

“dude, i told ya it was okay. i shouldve made more attention”

leaning your head on the taller’s shoulder, you rubbed the spot where she was hit. you felt yujin stiffen at the lack of space between the two of you but you chose to ignore it

“ynnie.”

“yunjinniee”

“your ankle is getting worse..”

your gaze followed where her finger pointed at, there you noticed how swollen and discolored your ankle had gotten

“pfft- s whatever! ill jus walk it off-“

BANG!

both of you searched for where the commotion was, finding a few monsters had gotten to the rooftops entrance

yujin had to act fast, each time she struggled to make a decision could mean your death.

“fuck. yn can you walk?”

“uh- y-yeah. . i think”

yujin was too in her head to hear the last thing you said before she grabbed your arm and booked it to the other entrance, she slammed open the door, not thinking about the other zombies in the school

dragging you down the stairs, she watched as 3 more of those things saw the both of you

she froze.

“yn . . i-“

“GO!”

she heard a door slam open and felt the impact of the floor against her back

“ow- fuck. wait- yn?”

yujin watched as the door stayed open, your figure on the floor

“ynnie. . cmon! those things are getting closer!”

you crawled to the door while yujin got up to shut the door after you entered

pulling you to the corner of the classroom, you both began to catch your breath, grateful that this room was empty . .

a minute passed by before yujin looked at your disheveled form, feeling guilty once again

“hey- hey um.. im so so sorry this happened, god you have cuts on your face! fuck. if only-“

you put a finger to her lips.

“ stop rambling, i should be okay by tomorrow . .”

seeing the girls pout, you gave her a quick peck on the cheek

though it didnt help at all

“im in love with you.” she confessed

“what? are you serious?” you whispered, backing away from the girl

“oh. um yeah. . sorry the timing is so shitty..”

“you think so? oh my god yujin. i already told you we cant be together like this! plus, we nearly died out there what the fuck do you mean you’re in love with me?”

“m sorry really but i couldn’t help it. . i thought i shoulda told you cause what if we do die?”

“shut up.”

“okay. yes ma’am”

“ma’am?”

“ i meant yn. .”

you heard the girls voice break with each sentence, nearly making you cry but it would alert the monsters outside

minutes passed by. you only heard the screams of other students, before they were soon turned into just another shell of the person they once were

“y-yn” yujin whispered

“yujin. .”

“. . why cant you love me as much as i love you?”

“. . . you know i can't ans-“

“you say that every single time! please, just. . just say it.”

looking at the heartbroken girl tore you apart, if only this world hadnt changed so drastically, you could be happy with yujin

“ i want to be with you yujin. really, i do but . . you know im not here anymore.”

hearing that made the taller girl shiver. her vision getting more and more blurry with each second of silence between the two,

“oh. . r-right, fuck yeah you’re right”

she brought her knees to her chest, clinging onto them as if it were her dead lover, wanting to feel the warmth of anything in her arms,

“man. . this-this really fucking sucks”

yujins voice began to break due to her realization that you really were dead. she didnt save you. she couldn’t save you. how pathetic was that? the only person she cared about dead. dead, all because she didnt think quick enough.

“ i know . . though, please know im sorry for whats going to happen”

“huh?-“

BANG!

the girl’s eyes snapped to the classroom door, through the glass she saw the face of the one she cherished most, amongst the mahogany colored blood and drool . . yujin recognized that face, how could she not? she grew to love every ‘imperfection’ you thought you had. she always thought you were the most breathtaking woman she ever laid eyes on, no flaw could ever lessen the amount of love yujin had for you

but she had failed you. she promised to keep you safe, with every part of her soul. it didnt seem to be enough . . since you here were, lunging at yujin with no thought in your head.

the remnant of sanity you had was gone, as the husk of the person you once were started clawing at yujins torso

she felt every bone in her body break into brittle pieces, making yujin open her eyes

as she gazed into your bloodshot eyes she wondered how things would’ve went if she pulled you into the room quicker.

each passing second was like hell, struggling to breathe as you had broken through her skin

coughing up the crimson liquid was loud enough to alert the other monsters to yujins location,

wanting to look at her lover’s face for the last time, she noticed a small tear slide down your dirtied face

yujin wiped it away just before a hoard of zombies decided to help finish her off

at least the both of you would be together, right?

.

.

.

a group of survivors discovered the classroom yujin had passed in, they found a letter dedicated to you

“𝓣𝓸 𝓶𝔂 𝓨𝓷

𝓔𝓪𝓬𝓱 𝓭𝓪𝔂 𝓘 𝓼𝓹𝓮𝓷𝓭 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓘 𝓯𝓮𝓮𝓵 𝓶𝓸𝓻𝓮 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓶𝓸𝓻𝓮 𝓭𝓮𝓿𝓸𝓽𝓮𝓭 𝓽𝓸 𝓴𝓮𝓮𝓹𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓼𝓪𝓯𝓮 𝓲𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓱𝓮𝓵𝓵 𝓱𝓸𝓵𝓮. 𝓔𝓪𝓬𝓱 𝓭𝓪𝔂 . . 𝓘 𝓯𝓲𝓷𝓭 𝓶𝔂𝓼𝓮𝓵𝓯 𝓯𝓪𝓵𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓱𝓪𝓻𝓭𝓮𝓻 𝓯𝓸𝓻 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓷𝓪𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓪𝓵 𝓬𝓱𝓪𝓻𝓶. 𝓘 𝓻𝓮𝓰𝓻𝓮𝓽 𝓷𝓸𝓽 𝓽𝓮𝓵𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓫𝓮𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓮 𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓹𝓮𝓷𝓮𝓭, 𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓰𝓱 𝓘 𝓴𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓲𝓽 𝔀𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓭 𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓹𝓵𝓲𝓬𝓪𝓽𝓮 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼 𝓯𝓾𝓻𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻. 𝓘’𝓶 𝓰𝓵𝓪𝓭 𝓘 𝓱𝓪𝓭 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓸𝓹𝓹𝓸𝓻𝓽𝓾𝓷𝓲𝓽𝔂 𝓽𝓸 𝓱𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝓼𝓮𝓮𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓼𝓲𝓭𝓮𝓼 𝓸𝓯 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓷𝓸𝓷𝓮 𝓱𝓪𝓭 𝓼𝓮𝓮𝓷 𝓫𝓮𝓯𝓸𝓻𝓮. . 𝓘 𝓴𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓶𝓪𝔂 𝓼𝓸𝓾𝓷𝓭 𝓼𝓽𝓾𝓹𝓲𝓭, 𝓫𝓾𝓽 𝓘 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝔂𝓷. 𝓜𝓸𝓻𝓮 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓷 𝓪𝓷𝔂 𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓭 𝓲𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓼𝓪𝓷𝓭𝓼 𝓸𝓯 𝓵𝓪𝓷𝓰𝓾𝓪𝓰𝓮𝓼 𝔀𝓮 𝓱𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝓲𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓵𝓭 𝓬𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓭 𝓬𝓸𝓷𝓿𝓮𝔂. 𝓘’𝓶 𝓼𝓸𝓻𝓻𝔂 𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓼 𝓲𝓼 𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓹𝓮𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓽𝓸 𝓼𝓾𝓬𝓱 𝓪 𝓰𝓮𝓷𝓽𝓵𝓮 𝓼𝓸𝓾𝓵 𝓪𝓼 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻𝓼. . 𝓘 𝓻𝓮𝓰𝓻𝓮𝓽 𝓶𝓪𝓷𝔂 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼 𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓽 𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓹𝓮𝓷𝓮𝓭 𝓲𝓷 𝓶𝔂 𝓵𝓲𝓯𝓮 𝓫𝓾𝓽, 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝔀𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓭 𝓷𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓻 𝓫𝓮 𝓸𝓷𝓮 𝓸𝓯 𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓶. 𝓘 𝔀𝓲𝓼𝓱 𝔀𝓮 𝓬𝓸𝓾𝓵𝓭 𝓼𝓮𝓽𝓽𝓵𝓮 𝓭𝓸𝔀𝓷 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓰𝓻𝓸𝔀 𝓸𝓵𝓭 𝓽𝓸𝓰𝓮𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻, 𝓽𝓱𝓸𝓾𝓰𝓱 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝔀𝓸𝓻𝓵𝓭 𝓲𝓼 𝓪 𝓬𝓻𝓾𝓮𝓵 𝓽𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓰, 𝓻𝓲𝓹𝓹𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓪𝓹𝓪𝓻𝓽 𝓪𝓷𝔂 𝓭𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓶𝓼 𝓸𝓯 𝓷𝓸𝓻𝓶𝓪𝓵 𝓵𝓲𝓯𝓮 𝓪𝓰𝓪𝓲𝓷. 𝓨𝓷, 𝓘 𝓽𝓻𝓾𝓵𝔂 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝔀𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓸𝓯 𝓶𝔂 𝓱𝓮𝓪𝓻𝓽, 𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓸𝓯 𝓶𝔂 𝓼𝓸𝓾𝓵.

𝓕𝓸𝓻𝓮𝓿𝓮𝓻 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻𝓼,

𝓐𝓱𝓷 𝓨𝓾𝓳𝓲𝓷.”

pls don burn me at the stake cuz i wrote. rhrisd😞🙏

anyways.. stay safe n i love you guys so so much

- vicky 💋

[nicole-2099]

•Opposites always attract•

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HH. Hyunjin xreader.

Enemies to lovers trope.(kinda..?)

[‼️WARNING‼️]: 「•Smut, fingering, teasing,unprotected s3x,•」

‼️18+‼️ LAVE IF UR NOT OLD ENOUGH. NOW! >:[

Ima get straight to it😭🤚 I also haven’t posted in a few months Soo I got no time to waste!!

Note; also I haven’t written in a while so if it’s a lil scrambled I’m sorry no I didn’t proof read shi I’m too lazy anyways HAVE FUN READING U MF<3

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Well, let’s just say you and Hwang Hyunjin aren’t very fond of each other, he hates you for many reasons but his go to reason is the fact you and his best friend jeongin got closer, but he shouldn’t even hate you. You and jeongin have been friends for a while, plus not to long ago you moved in with jeongin and hyunjin, so you hoped hyunjin would grow out of his hater era. Wrong. Hwang Hyunjin was your biggest opp ever! He never left you alone especially when you’re busy with university and tests everyday. He always had something to say or do to make your day so much more worse, not like it’s not already.

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“Ugh could this night get any worse.” You’d say combing you fingers threw your hair murmuring to yourself about how your going to fail this upcoming test, but silence never lasts long. Sure enough Hyunjin came through the door like he’s the FBI.

“Shut up I was trying to sleep but it’s hard with you fucking talking to yourself nonstop.” Hyunjin said as he walked into your room and shut your laptop and turned your light off clearly annoyed with you.

“Dude wtf is your problem, leave me alone I’m busy.” You’d say getting out of your chair pushing him away from your desk. Hyunjin glared at you with ice cold eyes, clearly mad and pissed off, he’d step closer to you his body inches away from you as he bent down to get down to your level “Idgaf what you’re doing, stop. Doing it.” He’d say as he grabbed you by the shoulders and pushed you onto your bed “Go to fucking sleep.” He’d say as he walked out of your room and closed your door.

You’d lay there in your bed as you thought about how your probably going to fail and be a loser, tears swelling in your eyes as you thought of all of the disappointment your family will be in when they find out your failing as a person, curling yourself into a ball your knees to your chest as you tried not making to much noise so you don’t get yelled at again.

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Suddenly Hyunjin came into your room again “DIDNT I FUC-…are you crying..?” Hyunjin asked his tone instantly changing from anger to worry. You’d shake your head wiping away your tears quickly as Hyunjin walked over to your bed side and sat down next to you lifting your chin so you’re looking at him. “What the fuck are you crying over brat.” He’d say trying to still keep his cold exterior, but you knew he cared enough about you to stay in your room for more than 5 minutes. “I’m fine, I’m just tired..” you’d say as tears started to form in your eyes again. Hyunjin shook his head knowing you were lying to his face making him annoyed with you again, then he said “Stop lying to my face idiot, what’s wrong, your to tough to cry over me yelling at you so what’s up?”

He was right, you never got so upset to the point you cried when he yelled at you. “It’s nothing I, I’m just I’m stressing over the tests, and you coming up and shutting my laptop didn’t help.” You’d say your voice quivering as tears streamed down your face again, your hands shaking as you tried to calm yourself down. Hyunjin sighs before saying “Oh fuck you, I deal with 10x more stressful things and look at me, I deal with it fine.” You took in what he said for a second. Maybe, just maybe, a good fuck would help out with your terrifying thoughts. “I mean.. the fuck part might help me stop crying.” You begin saying before he quickly responds with “Alright, lay down.” You look up at him wide eyed. “Wait actually-.” Before you could finish your sentence, Hyunjin kissed you without warning, grabbing your face and pulling you into him. You’d pull away in shock as you stare at him in awe 🫢. “What?” Hyunjin said as he looked at you. “nothing I just didn’t expect- you know, for you to do that.” You said your eyes shifting to look at your hands. Hyunjin smirks at you as he lifts your chin up so your looking at him. “Don’t get all shy now, you did ask for it, love.”

You’d think about what he said for a moment, he did have a point you did ask for it. “I guess I did- but” before you could finish. Hyunjin leaned into you again pulling you in for another kiss. This time you felt your body melt into it, you don’t know why, it’s not that you don’t want it, but you’re confused on why you do. You’d pull away from the kiss for a moment before feelings his hands all over your waist, his fingers digging into your skin as he straddled your hips over his lap pressing you against him. You’d struggle for a moment letting a small moan, as his grip tightened on your waist and hips. “Hey, look at me.” He said as you looked up at him as he calmly whispered to you, “You sure..you want this..”

You’d think about it for a second, nodding in response. “Mhm...” Hyunjin gave you a small smile then he pulled you into him again, this time leaving small kisses and bite marks on your neck marking you up. With a soft moan your back arched upwards, your chest and hips pressing against his chest and hips closing the small gap between the two of you. “Hey shh, we don’t want Jeongin to hear you do we?” He’d say running his fingers down your side holding onto your hips, you’d shake your head covering your mouth with your hand praying you could mask the sound.

Hyunjin smirks as he pulls your hand away from your mouth, lifting up your chin, his hooded eyes locked onto your eyes as he kisses your lips. You pull back for a moment before just giving in and leaning into him more.

He’d pull away from you his chest rising and falling as he caught his breath. “Take it easy pretty.” He said in a hushed tone.

You try to calm yourself down, trying not to seem desperate and touch starved, but is it really your fault (Yes actually it is)

Hyunjins fingers run down your side and squeeze your thigh, he looks at you with a spark in his eyes and his fingers lightly rubbing against your inner thigh, as you try to hush your moans, Hyunjin soon then looks up at you for a moment looking for a look of discomfort or dislike as he slowly pulls the hem of your shorts down and tosses them on the floor as his fingers slowly run up your thigh getting closer to your core that was practically soaked from how turned on you were.

You let out a soft sigh gripping onto the sheets as his fingers gently rub on your clothed clit, his eyes still searching your eyes for any discomfort, you’d move around a bit being the touch starved girl you are, but Hyunjin holds you down his hands keeping a firm grip on you. “now now pretty, don’t move around so much for me, yeah?” And with a hushed sigh his fingers slip under your panties and start rubbing against your desperate pussy.

You gasp your body arches upwards as your try to keep quiet as you try and hush yourself with a pillow. Hyunjin looks at your desperate attempts to keep yourself quiet with a smirk on his lips, as his finger start to slip inside you slowly, his other hand keeping your legs open.

As you felt his finger inside you, you could barely think straight, you face shoved in a pillow as you whine and whimper you sounds already begging for more.

And hyunjin notices it his fingers slowly going in deeper curling as he slowly starts to thrust them in and out of you gently, making your pussy clench tightly around his fingers as you moan and whine squirming as he holds onto you with a firm but gentle grip.

“Feel good? pretty..” He’d ask his fingers thrusting into you a bit quicker and harder.

“oh yeah you look so fucked out right now and I’m not even inside you yet..” he’d say looking down at your face, it was red and flushed as cover your mouth muffling your sounds.

“I can’t- help it..” you say your voice shaky and desperate, your grip on the sheets tightening as he sped up your head arching back your eyes shut tight your legs shaking.

“Hyunjin pleasee..” you beg desperately your voice cracking as you try not to scream out. Hyunjin looks down at you with a mischievous smirk as speeds up, but pulls out his fingers right before you almost cum. “Now now if you cum now pretty, it wont be so fun anymore will it..?” You whine and squirm around begging for some kind of release. “Noo don’t do this..me.” You groan.

Hyunjin notices how desperate your being and leans down close to your ear, “so do you not want me to fuck you.??” He says with a playful teasing tone as he starts to undo his pants, know what you want already, you look at him eyes pleading and begging as you say your voice needy. “I didn’t say that hyunjin Pleaseee!!”

Hyunjin chuckles at your cute response loving how desperate and needy you were acting just to get fucked, “I’m just messing with you pretty, you did so well keeping quiet for me so you deserve this..” and with that he pulls his pants and boxers just enough for his dick to spring up, precum dripping off the tip as starts to grind the tip just over your already soaked puffy pussy, teasing you further.

You’d look at him eyes begging for it, so he did just that slowly he’d push the tip inside slowly going a little deeper before stopping for a moment to let you adjust, and that was good cause when he went in deeper you instantly gasped your body arching as you let out a moan.

Hyunjin looks at you eyes full of need as he slowly starts to thrust in and out of you slow and gently at first but after a bit he speeds up causing you to let out a moan your body shaking.

Hyunjin looks down at you his face slightly flushed but not too noticeable, his thrusts speeding up as he speaks in a shaky breathless tone. “you look so cute right now..fuck this is why I tried my best to hate you my whole life, because I knew if I didn’t at least try I’d be in love with you..” his words ring out in your ears for a second sending a shiver down your spine, but his words quickly fade in you mind as your to busy trying to keep your mouth shut while you get your pussy fucked up.

“God you feel so good right now..” hyunjin moans his voice almost sounding desperate as he thrusts into you deeper making you cry out your legs shaking slightly. “Aww you’re close already pretty.., well thats-..fine..” hyunjin huffed his hands going to grip onto your hips as he speeds up a bit more, feeling you clenching around him tightly.

You’d squirm your legs shaking as you close to your release, also feeling him twitch inside you as his thrusts get more aggressive slamming into you.

“Fuckk your close too..” his chest heaves as he continues to thrust into you until the both of you reach your limits, you tighten around him your legs shaking as you cum, and he groans thrusting into you one last time before filling you up.

“Fuckk..” he sighs his body shaking as he pulls out of you and lays down next to you for a moment trying to catch his breath.

“Fuck I hate you..I hate you for making me love you..” he says with a sigh and he pulls you into a tight hug keeping you close while the both of you start falling asleep.

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The next morning jeongin walks into your room trying to see if you’ve seen hyunjin and there he was in your bed with you sleeping, jeongin looks at the two of you blankly (in utter shock) as he walks out and shuts the door.

FINALLY ENED UP FINISHING THIS UGHHHHH.

[girltigerclaw]

breaking into ur house rn

top ten characters and bottom ten. reasons are optional

I just finished this chart thing i think i actually stole from your blog a few months ago <3 Slightly edited to my own prefs.

If anyone wants the template check the reblogs, and feel free to add you own. I'd love to see. I'm just rambling under here:

Leafpool: She is more special and sacred than the virgin mary. She has everything. Daughter of the first protagonist, ex boyfriend for me to hate, TONS of wlw situationships<3, a lifetime of tragedy, and some of the most gorgeous canon art to exist.

Crookedstar: Crookedstar is a trans woman to me. Her life is genuinely just so tragic and fucked, I love it. The erins asked: “How much truama, death and misfortune can you fit into a single cat?” and then they wrote Crookedstar’s promise.

Tawnypelt: GIRLS WHO HATE THEIR FATHERS. The erins dont love her like I do.

Tallstar: I love old men… I fucking love seeing older characters and how much they’ve changed from their younger selves. Tallstar is considered one of, if not the most peaceful leader in the clans. But also when he was like 19 he went on a quest to fucking murder a guy :3

Cloudstar: I rlly do not care abt anyone in Skyclan(I like Leafstar but she's not a fav yknow?) Cloudstar... he was based as fuck. Why did Starclan get away with this shit for real??

Scourge: It’s fucking Scourge. He’s awesome

Briarlight: I’m disabled and I love her. She has such a consistent fun, sweet personality and she makes me happy!!<3

RavenBarley: It deserves all the attention and hype it gets. Though I wish mlm ships didn’t overshadow wlw ones in this fandom, RavenBarley is genuinely well written and makes me very emotional even if the publisher didnt allow it to be explicitly canon.

CrookedBlue: TRANS WOMEN CROOKEDSTAR YURI. Two leaders having a forbidden relationship and kits is way more interesting than Oakheart. The angst of Crooked and Blue sitting next to eachother every gathering while the entire forest has their eyes on them. Don’t look for too long, don’t let the mourning slip into your voice. You have to pretend your lover is a stranger. You… have become strangers. You can never be together again. You're enemies now. This is what we wanted, isn’t it? …We’ll never be happy again.

Mothwing: Her novella delving into her relationship with Hawkfrost was so good and heartbreaking.

Heathertail: Daughter of leader, sister of a major villian, and former love interest of a protagonist! Why did she fall off the second po3 ended. She’s shown to be very compassionate and willing to put her own feelings aside for the sake of others. Would’ve honestly prefered her as a mate to Lionblaze or get a pov herself over the nothing we got.

Blackstar: *Murders an elderly woman trying to stop me from kidnapping children. Supports a dictator openly abusing/neglecting children and the elderly. Murders a man for refusing to kill mixed raced children- then tells said man’s sister that she will never be safe.* Man…. i sure do feel bad for abusing and killing all of those people…. Good thing I will face no consequences and proceed to be made leader, where I will have even more power over the wellbeing of others.

I hate. This guy.

The New Prophecy: A classic. My first series was actually tnp! i feel more attached to first arc cats tho, if you couldn't already tell by my list lmao

Johanna Map- Best Tawnypelt content out there

BlueQuince: My personal handcrafted, homemade Yuri. Bluefur feels terrible about Tiny going missing and promises Quince she’ll help her find him. They never did, but they had a very… fleeting but intimate relationship. Quince is grieving and Bluefur feels so overwhelmed by the duties in her clan. They’ve always thought of eachother since but never met again.

Tigerclaw: My name sake<3 The angst of his earlier life is so, so facinating to me. Starclan being straight fucked up and decided killing him is their only option? He was a kid and they saw him as a lost cause from the start. They never tried any other methods, never tried to steer him in the right direction or… even just take it into their own hands and kill him themself, which they have SHOWN they’re capable of.

They watched all the the horrific crimes he commited, entirely aware they were going to happen. Thats. Fucking. Horrifying. Starclan is scary as shit… and his death? FANTASTIC. I only wish he’d gotten lives from cats he killed so that him coming back to life to suffer over and over was an actual curse from Starclan and not blessings. They knew how he would die and they gave him the lives to torture him for his sins…

Flywhisker: Adhd girlies. Painfully relate to that feeling of the constant scolding for never being “good enough” because I prefer to do things a certain way or struggle to focus. So, SO happy for her when she left the clans! You don’t have to prove yourself to anyone! Hope she’s happy and warm indoors with her brother💕

(P.S. I was very suprised to find she actually had an official art piece!)

Bluestar: Get behind me women with mental disorders. I will defend you. Beautifully complex and tragic character, my favorite written in the series. Literally can't think of a single other female character in handled as seriously and with the complexity of Bluestar. (Although her super edition was a bit of an L with how others treated her, it ultimately makes her breakdown even more painful.)

Exile from Shaodwclan: Nightstar my beloved! He's such a great guy. The rightful leader of Shadowclan, always and forever.

Ravenpaw's Farewell: HE DIED IN BARLEY'S ARMS, TELLING HIM HE WILL FIND HIM, NO MATTER WHERE HE IS. FUCK.

Crookedstar art: So beautiful. I genuinely think she's one of the prettiest cats in the series. This along with her official art by Wayne Mcloughlin.

Leopardstar: As a kid I hated her and loved Blackfoot, now I hate Blackfoot and love her. #feminism. But seriously I think she has way more going for her than he ever has. Her father is a medicine cat who hates violence, the DRASTIC change in Riverclan's view of outsiders upon Crookedstar's death and her leadership. Her already having a position of power before proving she's unworthy of it. (Unlike Blackstar who gets rewarded for his racism and violence by being made leader afterwards) and the fact she has to interact with her victims on a daily basis after what she did.

The writings attempts to redeem her are really lame and dismissive of the actually damage she did, but at the very least they TRIED to do something else with her. Personally, I would have loved to see her assassinated by Mistyfoot. Just like her mother Bluestar was almost killed all those moons ago by Tigerclaw... The parallels of violence for power and violence for peace. A victim repeating the actions of the very man who killed her brother to put an end to what he started in Riverclan.... A shadow in Riverclan, if you will. (<-Pretending erin hunter has hired me to rewrite their series)

Windclan: Tunneling as a concept and inviting outsiders into their clan so friendly and casual makes the clan seems so much more diverse than the others. It always stuck out to me!

Andddd there are my current warrior cat options as of 2023! If someone actually read this whole ramble ily<3

[p41nty]

adam katz has done way too much shit and y'all just let it slide we all know about the ableism in the show and the fact he blocked who dared criticize him, but let's talk about the blatant ZIONISM of this man:

he had an isreali flag in his instagram bio until he was called out for it.

he said he put it there for "jewish pride" BITCH THAT'S NOT AN EXCUSE, THE GENOCIDE HAS BEEN GOING ON FOR 70 YEARS

he originally wanted to delay an episode for ONE DAY "to express our condemnation of violence"… sounds like shitty white man capitalist performative activism doesn't it

when he was called out he deleted his twt, privated his instagram and blamed it all on "harassment" and "death threats". what a fucking coward. y'all yt ppl love using the word "harassment" as a fucking buzzword

his mother, jill katz, openly expressed her support for isreal and was following the IOF on twitter. guess the apple doesn't fall far away from the tree.

we should kill this fucker already

do i even have the mental capacity to reply to this coherently.

adam is not his mother? he doesnt share the same views? hes made it explicitly clear he does not support the genocide. hes a jewish man who wanted to celebrate jewish pride but all of you motherfuckers think that just because someone is jewish means they support israels actions. news flash, they DONT.

have you even been on twitter to witness the threats actually happening? i have SEEN people be absolutely horrible to that man and send him death threats and harass him. but just because hes a white man you seem to think he just throws around that word to get sympathy. how is he gonna SEE any of the sympathy if he doesnt have any accounts to begin with?

and im not gonna pretend i wasnt pissed off at ae's shit episode delay, i was. i was infuriated that they thought one day was enough.

they heard us and changed it in the end didnt they? they listened to us and delayed it another week to make room for more awareness

of course at the time preferably not air it at all as it would act as a distraction from what was happen but ae is kinda going downhill so im not really surprised + the ableism thing has been going on for a while with the entire team and not just adam on his own (this is not defending him im mentally disabled myself so seeing him do this stuff is also harming towards me)

"blocked people who dared criticize him" because it resulted in him getting harassed. he unblocked them and apologised + put out a public apology about it later on (and it was well written might i add) since he had to step back and take a breather due to all the harassment he received

let me say this again.

NOT ALL JEWISH PEOPLE ARE ZIONISTS. ADAM DOESNT SHARE THE SAME VIEWS AS HIS MOTHER. LEAVE HIM AND HIS RELIGIONS BELIEFS ALONE.

the fact youre wishing actual DEATH on him makes you no better.

[the-gayest-tree-you-ever-did-see]

all my ttpd notes on each song before public opinion (overall opinion of the album at the end)

i didnt include tracks 1-6 bc ive posted about them already, but ill add them slowly by eod tomorrow most likely

fresh out the slammer

this is the track i was most excited for i think

oh title drop very early

fresh. out. the slammer. uhhh

i love the flow on all of the songs but i especially like this, its very fluid

FOR JUST ONE HOUR OF SUNSHINE!!!

in the shade of how he was feeling

the flow is very midnight rain i think

OOOH THE CHANGE AT 2:25 I LOVE THISSSSS

"im the girl of his american dreams" OMGGGG

i like the second half way better but the song is awesome

i think what im noticing about the album overall (so far) is it feels very empty production wise. its mostly her voice carrying it through but its hollow and i really think we need a more full production on this, or at least some parts of it. it feels uneven yk? or sort of unfinished, like she had the vocals and just slapped something behind it

florida!!!

VERY VERY EXCITED FOR THIS FLORENCE!!!!!!

and my friends all smell like weed or little babies.... ok.

okkkk less than a minute in and this is sooo anti-capitalist for a billionaire

FLORENCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i was so scared she'd be swept aside

"all my girls got their lace and their crimes"

so many mentions of a cheating husband on this album

"is that a bad thing to say in a song?" I LOOOOOVE MENTIONS OF THE MEDIA IN THAT MEDIA

FLORIDAAAA!! IS ONE HELL OF A DRuug..........

you can kind of here the thinness (??) of taylor's voice next to florence, the depth is lacking -- not necessarily bad, just something you can hear more with this track

some parts of it ("little did you know...") sound sort of like everybody wants to rule the world, idk if thats just me

guilty as sin

love the production this is so niceee

am i allowed to cry!

"oh what a way to dieeeee"

MESSY TOP LIP KISS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

without ever touching his skin, how can i be guilty as sin............ is this about matty healy please

the quiet distorted "what?" in the bg is very bejeweled

my bedsheets are ablaze

the melody on this is lowkey kind of boring. theres points where i expect her to do something interesting with her voice and flick up or drop low or trill and it just doesnt happen. would be very cool if that was there

"long suffering propriety" that whole bridge is written well but sung so clunky? like it doesnt sound natural it sounds like syllable filler yk? and i know this bc i do it way too much KSJDCHIUHRFIUH

ending with am i allowed to cry, its very much an internal song. idk how to explain it but shes looking in, and when she says am i allowed to cry, shes looking up. <- what???

whos afraid of little old me?

ooooh it starts out so cunty

"my bare hands paved their paths"

you dont get to tell me about sad!

I LOVE THISSS its so mad woman its so rep coded

"i leap from the gallows and i levitate down your street" GREAT LYRIC HILARIOUS VISUAL ITS LIKE THAT HALLWAY MEME BUT WITH TAYLOR. hold on

okay

WHOS AFRAID OF LITTLE OLD ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you should be <- ME TO MY MOM

production goes off cunty as fuck

"the scandal was contained" OMGG TELL ME TELL ME

you dont get to tell me you feel bad variant

BRIDGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i think this is my favorite track i love it

"the circus life made me mean" ooooh very very interesting. i will analyze this song more fully later but not on this post

"tell me everything is not about me, what if it is?" OKAYYYYY

the way she sings "you should be" reminds of something on folklore/evermore but i cant think of what

shes very cool on this song. the emotion actually comes through.

"you wouldnt last an hour in the asylum where they raised me." oh okay! so like. have we considered not saying that.

i think that line turned me off the whole song KJSDCIUERFHIUEFH LIKE???? HELLO???????

i just. hm. very disappointed. you have one billion dollars. your parents put down the deposit for your career. ok.

the way she sings "wretched" and "narcotics" is what i wanted for more of the album. ykwim.

i will admit her screaming the title is veeeery very nice

"i am what i am cause you trained me" okkkk. im sorry taylor my bad!

idk how i feel about this song anymore. should i just ignore the lyrics and listen lmaoo

i can fix him (no i really i can)

okay i was waiting on this song but with the context of the rest of the album. idk. we'll see

okay IMMEDIATE ick.......... "the smoke cloud billows out his mouth like a freight train through a small town" okay taylor i guess rhymezone was in for her. idkkkkk

okay next line came in actually i spoke too soon it serves !!

this is very cowboy like me inverse

ughhh title drop already. see i wanted it cunty!!! why title it that when its so nothing. this is SO NOTHING

is this about matty healy. girl hes a neonazi you cant fix him

BRIDGE?????? i love when she shows off her kinks

okay. yeah this song was very nothing.

loml

the piano is very gentle on this and muted. i like it

is this aaron dessner? hold on lemme check

yes it is!!!

"never before and never since" looooove <3 <3 <3

"still alive, killing time at the cemetery, never quite buried in your suit and tie" LOOOOOOVE <3 <3 <3

this is very her relationship with religion methinks....

"about a million times" ala illicit affairs "a million little times"

"when your impressionist paintings of heaven turned out to be fakes" i think this is my favorite lyricism out of the album, its very natural its very clear its very real. i really really like it

A CONMAN SELLS A FOOL A GET LOVE QUICK SCHEME. GAGGED

some of it is very grieving that she didnt last with her first love, that she still has to work for it. but its also still feeling like a metaphor for religious beliefs and god, that she cant fully believe and she wishes she had unwavering faith

MR STEAL YO GIRL????????????

"talking rings and talking cradles"

i wish i could unrecall how we almost had it all

"SOMETHING COUNTERFEIT'S DEAD" GLITCH I ALWAYS BELIEVED IN YOU (lie)

"ill never leave. never mind"

the way this extends is very phoebe bridgers and the way she enunciates "loss of my life" is very her as well

okay donesies. i liked this one a lot.

i can do it with a broken heart

i like the glimmery production

lyrics again are flopping a little :/

"im a real tough kid, i can handle my shit" 😸 okay

GOTTA FAKE IT TIL I MAKE IT TIL I DID !!!

the lyrics are so over and so back so much its killing me. i cringe so hard i cry and then i gag just as hard

lights camera bitch smile even when i wanna die......................

"ALL THE PIECES OF ME SHATTERED WHILE THE CROWD WAS SCREAMING MORE" im so. im sooo sos so so feeling aout this.

whos counting in the background idk how i feel about it

"im so depressed i act like its my birthday everyday" ughhhhh!!! cunty but she didnt sing it right yk. idk.

production slays

"im so obsessed with him but he avoids me like the plague" we're back again. i told yall its over and back and over and back SOOOOOO MUCH

okay i think i like it

I CRY A LOT BUT I AM SO PRODUCTIVE! SOOOOOOOOOOOO ME

i wanted the whole album to be like that verse

im a real tough kid again :/ shhhh

"in stilettos for miles" eras im so so sorry girl

IM SO DEPRESSED I ACT LIKE ITS MY BIRTHDAY EVERY DAY IM SO OBSESSED WITH HIM BUT HE AVOIDS ME LIKE THE PLAGUE I CRY A LOT BUT I AM SO PRODUCTIVE ITS AN ART YOU KNOW YOURE GOOD WHEN YOU CAN EVEN DO IT WITH A BROKEN HEART! ! !

when she does "you know youre good!" and the laughing and everything ohhhh my god. IM SO MISERABLE! AND NO ONE KNOWS! dont try and come for my job OKAYYYYYYY SHE SERVED ON THIS

okay i think i really like this song. i just need a couple days lol

the smallest man who ever lived

veryyyyy excited for this. i think. a little.

"who the fuck was that guy" OKAYY!!!!!!!!

theres no lyric i was to write here but its all very good btw

she sounds like my english teacher vocally and its killing me KSJDCIUERHFIUERH

"in public showed me off then sank in stoned oblivion"

i cant figure out what shes saying "once your queen had come, you treat her like an ulcer and"??? alseran?? i cant understand it skdjfhieurhiuerg

you didnt measure up in any measure of a man !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! taylor date girls <3

the production is building here i like it is she gonna belt/scream

YEAHHHH BELTING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"were you a sleeper cell spy in 50 years will all this be declassified and youll confess why you did it and ill say good riddance cause it wasnt sex [something something] and it wasnt forbidden" I REAAAAALLY LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i like when she makes up situations and puts herself in them

YOU CRASHED MY PARTY AND YOUR RENTAL CAR

you kicked out the stage lights but youre still performing.

"you are what you did" versus innocent's "who you are is not where you've been"

i like this track

the alchemy

I WAS SUPER EXCITED FOR THIS BUT NOW IDK HOW TO FEEL!!! idk im just jumping in

oh r&b production?? interesting....

ooh whats the rumbling thing i like that

shes returning to something but what...

TOUCHDOWN IS THIS KILLATRAV !!!!!!!!!!!!!! KILLATRAV KILLATRAV !!!!!!!!!!!

oh title drop but i wasnt listening KJSHCIUHEGFH

reference to maathp

is this returning to american boys KJIUFHEORUFHOERF???

oh this is sooooo referencing maathp

okay but it sounds like this person and her were already together and now theyre back "his heart....is still reserved for me" or maybe thats just trav holding on the friendship bracelet

i hate to say this but "wheres the trophy? he just comes running over to me" is very call it what you want + sweet nothing and another song i cant remember right now but yall know...... im sorry

im stupid as hell i cant hear what the line is where she says the alchemy

"he jokes that its heroine but this time with an e" THIS TIME??????

very much like this song. def not what i was expecting and im disappointed in that regard but its still a fun song

clara bow

nervous for this song. i like when she references people and places but theres a way to do it so i get scared every time

oooh ear ringing noise is very fun. i hope its not the whole time though

immediate title drop

oh so its not her? shes talking to someone else i think

oh this is in her past i think

lyrics are flopping.

"breath of fresh air through the smoke rings" like i can fix him (no really i can"

ohhh tambourine WAS stevie nicks reference

SORRY i dont like how she says eclipse lmaoo

i kind of dont vibe with all the small town references its as if she needs to remind us where she came from to be considered good like look how much i did when i came from nothing (even though she didnt)

YOU LOOK LIKE TAYLOR SWIFT IN THIS LIGHT !!!!

youve got edge, she never did girlllllllllll

so does she consider herself the "replacement" for clara bow?

song is okay i think it might grow on me. i think the biggest disappointment on this album is how predictable it all feels sonically.

the black dog

bonus track!! this is the only one i have so i might add the others later but tbh i might wait bc i dont know how much i. care.

muted pianooooo i love muted piano<333

YOU SHARED YOUR LOCATION AND FORGOT TO TURN IT OFF

oh the black dog is a bar. im kind of. okay. okay

"shes too young to know this song" is a nice line but its clunky how its sung

old habits die screaming!

girl your longing does NAWT stay unspoken

folklore when she used "big" words it felt natural (for the most part). here it feels performative? like it doesnt FIT naturally

"was it hazing for a cruel fraternity i pledged" idk how to feel about this!

lots and lots of smoke references!

"six weeks of breathing clean air" -> CLEAN!!!!!!!!!!

two times she says she wants to burn her clothes on this album

i like the production im literally kind of ignoring the lyrics

omg never mind "tail between your legs youre leaving"

personal ick but i hate when songs cut off in a word. she goes "old habits die screeeeeam-" and nothing. JUST SAY THE -ING

okay cool. mid song but i hope the swifties who thought it was about depression and got the variant are feeling okay<33

overall: idk about this album. i went in really excited and so maybe thats why i feel so let down... but i feel so let down. this isnt what was marketed, this isnt anything even real for a lot of it. she's all over the place and i dont think its a tight and solid album -- although monetarily it will obviously look like one. there are moments where we get something very her and very real and i think those moments save the album. the production is also a little all over the place, and so very nothing. im not asking her to do anything fresh or new but why would you market it as if it was and not deliver?

i liked florida!!!, loml, and i can do it with a broken heart -- i think clara bow, the alchemy, and some others (you can tell with my notes LOL) will grow on me. and the tortured poets department and my boy only breaks his favorite toys were good songs, but i think i need a few days to actually acknowledge them as such.

also i think lyrically shes done a few very interesting things. it almost feels like debut with how specific it is and the name dropping and everything -- however it is new/rusty for her so that also kind of hurts her overall. i think maybe this is like good practice for a more evolved narrative lyricism in the future, bc her past mo of hazy visuals and thinly connected moments to string into a narrative just doesnt work anymore.

i will say. she did make me experience all 5 stages of grief plus some fun extras. maybe not in the way she wanted, but i did anyway ! its a fun album and i def think ill like it more as time goes on, but this is my opinion without outside influence and within the first day of listening -- i want to see how that changes! im also holding off on album rankings until a week or two passes

[spider-jaysart]

What was the last comic you read & your least favorite?

@pin-crusher2000

Last comic:

Supersons haha, because I love rereading it

Least favorite:

Ooooh sooooo many!!!😤

(Incoming spoilers about some of them btw, in case you plan on reading some of these)

1. The comic that Bendis wrote, which caused Jon's whole age up and then changed everything for him in his life in main comics after that

2. The Supersons comic that starred the older, current version of the boys, because even though it was supposed to be like "Oh look fans! The boys are back!!", It just wasn't the same since DC already messed things up. And there were also some ooc moments inside the book too in a way where it felt like they swapped a bit of personalities🤨, which was pretty odd and didnt help so much for the enjoyment either

3. Don't know if you know this video game series or not, but it's called Telltales the walking dead games, and after the series ended, a comic series called Clementine was released a while after that and it's all so horrible, because it ruins everything about Clementine (the main character) and the good ending she had in the last game, making all the struggles she went through in her survival journey over the years to keep living and hopefully find peace one day seem like it was all actually for nothing. The writer doesn't understand her at all and mischaracterizes her so much that it's super annoying!! I HATE that book so much!!!😤😤 That is not my Clementine, just Tangerine

4. The Legion of heroes comic where they met Damian, because the way they treated and spoke about him, especially right in front of him and also Jon who they know is his friend, was just so disgusting to see and I was disappointed in the way Jon handled it and how he still joined their team after that AND the fact that he still dated Saturn girl too. His written reaction during that moment just wasn't enough, because I believe he should've been way more mad about it all, lost some respected interest in their group, and have his feelings on Saturn girl really changed up afterwards, which he would've been right for and it fits his character better because he's protective of his loved ones like that

5. Marvel zombies. I've never read it before, so I can't say if anythings wrong with it, since I don't know how most of it's story throughout the series goes to actually say if it has good or bad writing, but I just hate whenever I see it, because it's all just really gross and too messed up for me. Don't get me wrong though, because I love apocalypse stories, they're my faves, it's just that looking at this series and the stuff that happens on page feels a bit too much for me

6. Beast Boy by Kami Garcia.

Idk if this counts enough to be added into the list, cause the book was good, it was fine, it's just an annoying thing that stuck with me that changes my view on the book whenever I reread it now, because Beast boy seemed like he was genuinely really into the popular girl in the story, but then at the end it turned out he was actually just using her to get the feel of being popular and that just didn't sit so well with me when I read that part, because that just only makes it look like that's all he ever really wanted from her now and wasn't actually interested fr, even when he did look like it. Then he just runs off onto an adventure in the end after admitting to his friends that he didn't actually care that much about her anymore, just when he had finally gotten her invested in him and it's like, dude, what the heck??? That's how you handle it????

7. "Beast boy loves Raven" and "Robin" both by Kami Garcia

These are both also fine stories, it's just another thing about one of the romances, which doesn't let me really get through the books so well the way I want to. Damian falls for Raven's sister in "Beast boy loves Raven", a little too quickly tbh, and soon starts dating her, which is continued in "Robin" (because ofc he does, he can never just be a single kid that's not being set up everytime with whatever same age girl they can throw at him or just can't be left not crushing on some mature woman who's way too old for him, which is just icky whenever that happens). It feels weird because he's instantly into her the second they meet without him getting to know her, he's flirting right away back with her when he doesn't actually get like that in canon and mostly keeps his feelings to himself when it comes to crushes since he's reserved, and then he begins dating her after not too long and then they're pretty close and so cutesy playful as a couple, which should be fine, but it's just the way it's done that feels off to me loll, and I'm not so sure how to exactly explain the vibe, like it's too overly sweet in a way that's just not fitting because it was kind of quick and Damian seemed way too expressive with it a lot??? Probably not the right way to say it, idk lmaooo, but a friend of mines also understands and feels the same on the whole topic here. Like, it all just feels ooc on Damian's part the way his character there handles the whole thing. And this is not because I'm a Damijon fan loll, cause even if it was Jon in the love interest role instead of Raven's sister in the two books, I wouldn't want it to be rushed either. I would want Damian to have to get to know him better too before actually developing any romantic feelings and showing any signs of interest in him, and after a good while of getting to do that, then he grows more comfortable around him and they start dating later, cause that would fit his character better and would make the cute, playfulness feel more fitting in the relationship and seem more natural since they've already gotten close enough to be that way. It's one of the reasons why I like Damijon lol, because they're both already so close in their friendship, that dating could work between them so well. Once again though, this is all just my opinion that I'm expressing

8. I am not Starfire

That book is just so dumb lmaooo, only the art is good. Mandy, the daughter of Starfire, is an annoying, spoiled child who only envies and disrespects her Mother, makes everything about herself, gets too mad about everything for no good reason, and she doesn't even share any Tamaranean features with Starfire in looks either, except for the green eyes and very normal looking ginger hair, like seriously??? Dick is obviously the Dad, but he won't step up to get involved at all and pretends this isn't his problem, and I hate that this a trope that keeps happening whenever Dick and Starfire have kids with eachother, one of them gets taken away or either just leaves the other on their own to deal with everything, which sucks, because they should be able to be a happy family all together already where the kids grow up with them both in their lives, not more of this. Anyways, besides those mentioned things, everything else in this book is also very annoying and makes no sense too and it's not worth the read at all because of it

9. The Injustice crossover with Jon

Most of that book was annoying, like for example when Injustice!Clark broke Jay's arm and then Jon threateningly went into Ultra power mode just to....give Clark a hug for it. Like wtf lmaoooo???? He was overly playing pacifist and it was so, so stupidly silly. And I don't even know what's going on in that universe now after he left it, like that's how much of nothing he did in there, except get sassy with everyone and try befriending Injustice!Damian lolll, which made things feel like a literal waste of time in the crossover when it seemed like he would actually try changing things up in there somehow

Okay, so I think that's it for now, cause I can't think of anymore books at the moment lol, so thanks for the ask, crusher! I like that I got to express about some of these! :)

(I apologize if these rants were a bit much btw, I just get like that sometimes because I don't get to do it enough😅, so, sorry about that, unless you're fine with it though and actually like reading that, which is awesome then, cause then I've got a good listener loll)

[fragmentating]

I dont think I've seen many discussions of this project or the similar ones this author discusses in other articles on here yet, which really is a shame and I reccomend everyone read it especially if you, like me, sometimes struggle with being asked "so what are alternative ways of treating people in crisis"

Under the cut is some very personal ramblings about how I stumbled over this article and how it felt reading it for the first time in a fairly vulnerable state. Tw for abuse mentions, drugs, your fairly normal mad life shit. This is the most personal writing I have ever created on this overall topic, so I would really appreciate if any of you would give it your time of day, thanks..!

As an introduction I have to begin with this: I recently quit being a consumer. I was always a survivor, but I clung to anti psychotics for a couple years of adulthood because it felt preferable to the insomnia I'd find myself with without, and a nice little blanket of nothingness in the saved pills in those extra stressful moments. Whenever I'd quit, I'd come back sometime later again. Last time it was being desperate to quit getting excessively drunk every night. And the closed psych ward I checked myself into, because I genuinely was not capable of controlling my drinking at home in any way at all, starting me on seroquel once again. Neither helped me achieve sobriety long term (not really surprising to myself, but not the point of this, honestly). Rather I kept risking my health even more by consuming both on many nights after being back home. But the warnings sort of stop feeling real too. I mean, I've done this a few hundred times for sure by now. What really pushed me over the edge, was my tardive dyskenesia (tics) worsening and worsening, even after switching to another anti psychotic hoping itd stop the progression getting back on seroquel was causing. Sometimes they're painful. That's the worst. I was originally planning on trying another pill my friend had reccomended who was currently staying in rehab, hearing me lament my lack of sleep without this medication I didn't want anymore. he gave me the email address of the psych giving it to him that I could access through the outpatient services at the clinic for addiction by using the right keywords. It would've been easy.

But I never wrote that mail. Instead, after getting my last refill of Perazine, from that asshole psych who also misgendered me so aggressively and consequently, didnt matter that I legitimately already had changed my gender marker a year earlier... that refill was supposed to last me the next 3 months, and I halfheartedly tapered it off for 2 or 3 weeks. The thought of seeing his face again made me sick. This was now nearly exactly a month ago. I have felt no desire to write that email.

I didnt experience any of the common withdrawal symptoms I heard so much about, only after quitting completely, there was a very short bout of very confusing feelings, sensations, beliefs. The usual. I've been there, medicated or not. I made it through without reaching for a pill again. 3 days, max, then it was over. But suddenly I stopped sleeping, for up to 50 hours at a time. After about a week of that, I finally found someone online say insomnia can be a withdrawal symptom of quitting anti psychotics. I genuinely never heard of that before ? (But to be fair, maybe at some point I did, and the perazin and seroquel and others just made it drip off my longterm memory like teflon.) Either way, could it have been that every time I went running back for (sometimes way less bad) insomnia after quitting, it was actually fucking withdrawals? I thought I could probably keep this up for a few months until starting my new / first job. Unemployed people have an easier time staying up 50 hours at a time because we can simply collapse into bed at 9am after those and sleep all day. By now I'm mostly down to 30 hours at a time. Theres issues still, sure, but the quick progress is making me excited. I might never sleep perfectly normal, but at this point, I'd take that any day over daily substances.

What happened exactly, aside from the insomnia? I ran out of my weed a couple weeks earlier. Lost my hookup at the same time, so I decided, you know what, let me just not get something for a while, I'm not in the mood to look for something new rn. I was still drinking weekly with friends, but then they got sick for a while, and I only got drunk by myself once or twice that entire time. and somehow realized it wasnt actually my favorite alone-time substance anymore, that was weed. But I didn't have weed. So I just tried. And tried. And it mostly worked out. I stopped thinking about it. Had a small run in with cough syrup we dont talk about. And then I quit the perazine. I was terrified. This was the thing keeping all the other cravings at bay, right? It didnt make sense. I hadn't been "unmedicated" for more than a few weeks since the last 8 years. If I was out of pills, I'd turn to weed or alcohol or both. But nothing really happened this time. Because I stopped running from my feelings.

Slowly I started noticing it. There were so many things I was suddenly reacting to emotionally. Joy, pain, grief, connection, ... I never thought of myself as particularly numb before, but in comparison? It's hard to describe. It felt like every day further into getting off the perazine I felt more like myself. But how did I know it was me? It was someone I had never met before. I hadn't met adult me, ever. All I knew was abused kid me, abused teen me. It was me because now I felt alive in every little thing. Suddenly insomnia feels a lot less awful when you're having it by yourself, someone so novel but comforting. But with good emotions come bad. Suddenly I was crying curled up in a ball about memories from my most traumatic first institutionalization as a teen that I used to talk about like it was a fun little anecdote. There I felt it. "Go take one of your pills. 100m should probably be enough, maybe 150?" I wish I could say I did something super healthy. But I went for a cigarette cause I was really craving one, the breakdown had sort of delayed my usual midnight smoke. That turned into looking at the stars with music on my headphones for a bit. Back in bed I actually had forgotten about the pills again. Instead I opened up Google and typed in "psych abuse survivor". I was looking for something akin to a forum, I believe. But Nothing, really. A few term definitions on Wikipedia. Im no stranger to this internet search. And internet searches about anti psychiatry, anti psychotics, drug interactions, the name of the place I was institutionalized at. Every couple months I check if someone finally burned it down. And About to give up I saw the link to this article. And I opened it. Newly me, newly free to feel, really feel.

It was intriguing at first. I teared up a little a few times. Nothing major or surprising for my newfound emotional range. Then I got to the part where he talks about holding people, after they were allowed to freely let out their pent up rage, anger, manic energy, whatever it was, just let it out, all out. And theyd slowly come out of the (UNLOCKED) room (THAT THEY WERE ALLOWED TO LEAVE AT ANY POINT) after a few hours, and they would be hugged. And often they would start crying. Sometimes violently. And they would hold them lovingly, sometimes multiple of them, until the persons sobs trailed off into sniffles, into nothing. As I finished the sentence it broke out of me in a same way. Theres silent tears running down my cheeks writing this right now. But last night ? I was wailing. Sounds I had not heard from myself, ever. Not the night my grandmother passed. Not the nights I recalled sexual abuse, recalled my violent father, recalled my peers universally rejecting me for the freak I was, as I laid in my basement next to baggies of weed and xtc, as i sat in the bathroom watching blood go down the drain.

Suddenly it wasn't just the abuse in the ward that hurt. The memories of seeing tiny harm- and powerless kids strapped down and tied up, older boys injected and carried off, alarms blaring, keys turning in locks, a haze of benzos that made everything blur together, being watched as you shower, watched as you sleep. Dragged out of your room screaming. What hurt me so much I was wailing like never before was the love I needed, but never got when I needed it the most. I needed to be held as I cried. I dont think I have been held as I cried since I was 9 years old. I have been gawked at, yelled at, ignored and stepped over as I laid on the floor, walked past in public, threatened, locked up.

But I have not once been held.

[itsdappleagain]

THIS WEEK'S THE WEEK, FOLKS hopefully

IM GOING TO TRY TO CATHC UP ON CS WEEKLY AW YEAH!! ALRIGHT YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS

IT'S TIME FOR THE CHASING PAPER CAPER!

(look how cool these stars are they actually are sharp!! i folded a few of them, look!)

highly recommend- super easy to do with just sticky notes

ANYWAY here we go!!! notes under the cut as usual <3

MAN i am late on this episode but i am soo excited for it!!!

maelstrom wins for worst eyebags

sdjjfd mael's like yeah 💅 perhaps I am a little deranged

mael's va put his pussy into saying "intellect"

everyone and their mother has made vile presentation power point jokes already so im not going to beat a dead horse but. yeah. thats so fucking funny

CLEO ROLLS HER EYES AT BRUNT TOO HAHAHA

this bitch i stg

the way she smacks that table when she says darn right. i do believe her. she is texas proud. she would hate abortion

i also like that the show uses brunt as a vessel for the american seven year olds watching this who also have no idea what the magna carta is. its cool

i had no idea there were seventeen original copies of the magna carta. i guess i should have guessed but i think im used to the constitu- never mind there are 13 copies of that too. okay well we're learning today

okay so i think the museum the magna cartas is in is the Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj Vastu Sangrahalaya?? it looks very similar

in style, if a little changed for the show. really cool! i guess they didnt want to have to try to pronounce the name though

law and disorder (svu theme chime)

stealing paper, yes. but have you considered that paper star also. folds and throws and destroys with that paper and is generally NOT great at keeping it intact

bark bark i love watching season 1 through a post-shadowsan reveal lens. he knows paper star IS a threat, unlike most of the other operatives, so he opposes the idea,,

love maelstrom just cutting shadowsan off with a vote. he's stealing the symbols of democracy so his colleagues cant keep skipping out on majority rules

there actually is a cafe on the museum grounds that isnt EXACTLY where carmen is sitting but is pretty close. cs team did their research with this one

some guy named john is so funny

player jumped from the very general "you can't be arrested for no reason" to "YOU CANT HAVE YOUR HORSE TAKEN AWAY FROM YOU" very quickly

well there isnt actually any "of the liberties" in the direct translation but alright

love how they have the english article "the" in the title of the magna cartas while talking about how its latin wheeze

rest in piece 3/4 turn views of the face. the carmen sandiego artstyle is beautiful until it has to neogotiate carmen not having a nose

interesting that the museum gets subtly lighted in green. we alll know what that means

i like the dramatic reveal of paper star but i also think. how did player not notice the security cams were already down

she had a lil choker

i love paper star so much. she's fantastic

she does make horse noises when she skips though, which is why jo likes her so much

yeah. paper star is so cool

hmmm

THEY HAVE NEVER WRITTEN A BETTER AND MORE DEFINING LINE IN THIS SHOW THAN "RED IS A SMART COLOR FOR YOU. IT WILL HIDE THE STAINS." WHAT THE FUCK THEY POPPED OFFF ON THAT LINE

SHE SAYS IT AND CARMEN CANT DO SHIT SHE JUST RUNS. CARMEN IS LITERALLY ON THE DEFENSIVE ALWAYS IN THIS FIGHT KSHFDSH ITS SO GOOD

you know shit is real when someone protects the face

i love how carmen puts her fists up to fight like a normal operative v carmen fight and then ps just pulls out the stars its so funny. its like the indiana jones scene when he just pulls out a gun

YES this fight is a challenge for carmen and i LOVE IT

LITERALLY WHAT COULD BE BETTER CARMEN ALMOST GETS STABBED IN THE NECK ITS GREAT. PAPER STAR IS A GREAT VILLAIN. YEAH

so glad kimiko glenn could voice her god she does such a good job

paper star used up the smear frame budget in this one scene alone

i love how carmen tries her quip and fight formula again and AGAIN paper star is like. no <3 i am going to rip you to shreds with this terrible pun i made up and carmen is SO OVER IT JSDHGHS

love how carmen didnt move like girlie what did you think she was going to do with those pamphlets

papertiger fans go wild

no way did that fucking tiger decapitate a stone statue what the fuck does she put in there knives??? paper star gives children razors in their halloween candy i guess

once again carmen's love for saving things that she has mostly already ruined causes her to have a disadvantage! it sure would suck if another falling statue at some point was weaponized. that would suck

LOOK AT THE GOUGES THOSE PAMPHLET STARS MADE WHAT THE FUCK

the cut hat staying there is so funny to me for some reason

dont try to be sneaky, carmen. just walk right up the center

the transitions with the tapestry and paperstar's folds are cool as fuck

HOW DID SHE GET UP THERE

also she disappears behind that second tapestry which means she was clinging onto the back of the fabric like a koala. good image

paper star: wraps carmen in a tapestry s4 evil carmen in the finale: hey that was a good idea. julia come here

paper star is the queerest bitch on the map at all times and i love her so much for that

laughing so hard imagining how many takes gina had to do of carmen's pained moaning as she struggles in the paper wrap

yeah. paper star. okay as if i haven't gushed about her enough she is. so good. the little mm-mm-mm! as carmen struggles. going against all of vile's ideals as she leaves traces EVERYWHERE and then pulls the fire alarm, not hiding in plain sight at all. she leaves carmen wrapped up for the cops. yeah. god. yeah

least favorite part of this episode of carmen being more upset about her hat than she is about losing The Fucking Magna Cartas and GOOD GRAVY SHE MOANS ABOUT THE HAT FOR SO LONG CARMEN YOU HAVE LIKE FIFTEEN

i love seeing the remains of the fight when acme steps in the next day!! you can track where paper star shot at carmen and then wrapped her up, where she was firing on the first floor, the different types of paper..

where did paper star put that glass circle she cut out

chase just randomly picks up evidence barehanded and then tosses it to the floor 2. fuck him fuck him straight to hell. so glad this is a pro-julia episode jhfashgdfa

all she does is romanticize the scoundrel it is all she CAN do

yeah acme is secret and not even their families know about it. but also every cop ever knows about it too okay

chase. thats it thats the post (i dont actually hate him. hes funny. but also insufferable at times. that is our wife you are slandering, sir)

i cant tell if i want to make a joke or a serious comment about how she's doing a finger gun at the image of carmen so i'll just leave it here

FULL OF LOVE AND AUTISM

chase: the only agent who has been face to face with her the train scene: i am about to ruin this whole man's career

HAH. says player. next on the news

(eda voice) look its an outdated human reference

why was le chevre up there. did he come down from the cliff face just for fun. or scale it just for fun. nevermind that checks out

the people in this show have ankles of steel they be dropping 20-30 feet and just fine with it

everyone tries to banter with paper star and she just. no

the shifty glance around from le chevre shdgkjsghd

the drop in her tone and face when she says he looks like he would get caught is so good

PIPPI PUNKSTOCKINGS

she is straight up torturing this guy how did paper star get past the censors

its like he was swinging his dick around in her face and going NOO NOT MY DICK PLEASE NOT MY DICK you are literally offering them as targets sir they are the closest thing to her

and from that day on fanfiction writers across the globe only called her tammy again

rOLL CREDITS /ref

oh i havent mentioned the music in this episode yet. its so good. yeah

the animation also is beautiful. the train is very nice w/ the reflections in the water

and then chase showed up to ruin her day

THE LITTLE tsk. ugh. SHE DOES IS SO FUNNY

i love how she's just humoring him he's not even in the realm of worth her full attention

honestly impressed by how chill chase is in the conversation? last time he was on a train with "her" he whipped off "her" hat and screamed in "her" face. then with ivy he jumped her snowmobile and triumphantly yelled at her again

he's just kind of like. yeah cool. im around carmen sandiego. we should have a lovely chat and then i shall get her to lead me calmly to the magna cartas. this could not possibly go wrong

love chase where did he think she was hiding them

awww theyre holding hands

criminal of this show to not show her kicking his ass in the tunnel it would have been soo funny

i love the little fakeout they do in the tunnel too. like omg did he cuff her??? no she used an uno reverse card

ALSO the little details of this show. before carmen says "or what? you'll cuff me?" she glances out the train window. she already has this scene so perfectly choreographed in her mind that she can just time the tunnel and make her escape its so good

acme keycard!!!! little did carmen know that pickpocketing that card would lead to coach brunt most of the way murdering her in a basement a few weeks from now

HERE WE GO YOU GUYS THE GAY SCENE OF ALL TIME

AGAIN julia is on her tablet gosh i dont know why i dont ever think of her as tech savvy but she is ALWAYS tapping on that thing

julia is so nice to her carmen just. sits dsgjagkdsh

THE WAY SORRY CAN YOU IMAGINE IF SOME RANDO HOT LADY SAT DOWN ACROSS FROM YOU WITH NO PERMISSION AND THEN JUST WENT PARTNER 🤨🤨🤨🤨???? AT YOU WHEN YOU MENTIONED THE WORD LIKE SHE WAS DOING HER MAKEUP (so it seemed) AND SHE JUST. DROPPED EVERYTHING

is the plausible reason that "partner" set off cop warnings in carmen's head? yes. but is the gay reason that she wanted to make sure she wasn't about to flirt with some poor married woman? also yes is the gay response to this gay reason julia canonically going "NO GOD IM NOT WITH HIM WITH HIM"? yes and yes!!

THE IMMEDIATE JULES GOD

julia puts down her tablet and gives her FULL attention to carmen to talk about the taj mahal,,, yeahh....

ALSO i enjoy how carmen maneuvers the conversation. she asks julia's name and then immediately asks an engaging question afterward so that julia doesn't think to ask for HER name...

love how julia leans forward to talk to carmen augh...she is so engaged and relaxed

that line is so fucking iconic. the Eyes she's giving. the lean. she loves history even more. the fucking setup for way down in season 4

HAHAAAA JULIA PICKS UP ON THAT LITTTLE TINY CLUE CARMEN DROPS HER SO FAST AND I LOVE THAT SO MUCH...THE WAY SHE JUST IMMEDIATELY SITS UP AND HER BRAIN GOES wait a minute something about that remark wasn't right YEAH...YEAH YEAH YEAH

AND THEN SHE JUST STANDS UP OUT OF SHOCK ONCE SHE REALIZES WHO SHE JUST CHATTED WITH HEHEHE

god i honestly think that if chase hadn't been putting her down and scoffing at her interests and making her stay behind at crime scenes she would have gone after carmen. can you IMAGINE how different the episode would have been if she'd gone after her???? GOD (i can imagine....i have imagined....the polycule has done....a LOT of imagining...)

that liiiittle glance behind that carmen does to see if julia is following her before she starts focusing on paper star..

man i NEVER used to be able to figure out how paper star sensed carmen peeking around the corner but i realized about a year ago that she saw her reflection in the window...AUGH the little details of this show are so good

THE WAY CARMEN JUST POUNCES ON HER IS SO FUNNY

that gay little roll. paper star makes every fight just a little gay actually. now kiss

those shoes must have hurt so bad to get kicked with ow

second toilet paper joke of the episode. laugh.

i love the pro-environment message this episode was halfheartedly trying to juggle. it did not come across fantastically

the way paper star's eyes light up when she sees new paper is great

PAPER STAR'S THEME IS SO GOOOD....HOW SHE JUST. she just goes. "you should run." somehow she's the most campy villain and the most down-to-earth serious threat could and would kill you villain in the show and she rocks both at once

paper star is vaccuming her

you also know shit gets real when the background turns into a mass of colored streaks

i ALSO love about paper star that she can and does hold her own in hand-to-hand. yeah she's bet with her stars but she can pack a punch or a kick

TELL ME HOW CARMEN NABBED THAT CASE IN THE MILLISECOND BETWEEN PAPER STAR GRABBING THE PAPERS AND DRAWING BACK

carmen: yes i do think i will run now

i also like this fight because we don't often get to see carmen fighting when she's not in her trench coat. it gives it a much more sporadic, caught-off-guard feel to the whole thing somehow- which is again a trademark of paper star!! she doesn't do things like everyone else

something about the way carmen sprints to the end of the train and then turns around is so fucking funny. yes that is the last car! congratulations! its a good thing you came up here instead of trapping yourself in the interior of the last car I guess

rock paper scissors wind

THE FLIP OVER THE SHOULDER GAY STARE IS ALSO ICONIC AND SUCH A GOOD MOVE. carmen initiated it but fuck if she knows what she's going to do afterwards

ill say it again and a fcuking gain how much i like how much of a threat paper star is. yes girl. fling her off the train not once (sort of) but twice. carmen was an inch away from falling headfirst off that train and she knew it

i am not sure how exactly carmen pulled herself up from a lean by grabbing paper star's boobs and pulling her towards her but im good with it. also look at this animation she is desperate!! yess!!!!!! EMOTION!!!!

AND LEGO HANDS!!!!

now KISS

OBSESSED WITH HOW STRONG PAPER STAR IS WHEEZE SHE JUST F L I N G S CARMEN OFF THE SIDE. HER FEET ARE OFF THE FLOOR. BYE

the couple not even looking up from the newspaper is so funny

i love the broken physics of that vent(?) cover (?) throw its extremely entertaining to watch

carmen's triumph motif playing and then cutting to paper star just hanging there while a crow squawks at her is very funny. she just looks at it. i would like to think she makes friends with it. she does like murder

"agent devineaux??" "mnyeh.."

AND SHE DELIVERS THE MAGNA CARTAS TO HERRRR

good hands :))))

i love that she doesn't even need to say anything. we are just left to understand that paper star did end up one-upping her here in the end, and its this moment that nearly kills both her and chase

sassypants

i like the contrast of brunt and cleo shielding themselves when she throws the card, versus maelstrom standing and not flinching. he knows her better than they do

damn

i thought that was a vase theyre just his pants

HEHEE GOD THATS A GOOD EPISODE. yeah. yeah. okay

thats all i have to say for this one. other than the french connections caper this is my favorite episode in season 1!!

[orioonsstar]

Whimpering and Begging | HurtNoComfort fic

(Heavily Referenced the game for this, its kinda shittily written but i tried nonetheless, plot is changed quite a bii minus the minor details.. word count is like 3800+ so be wary if you read.)

CW/TW: Major Character Death, Angst Soap dies.. i mean what... noooo....

Graves had betrayed them, and fuck did it hurt.

A voice was struggling to pull him back from the harsh ringing plundering his hearing. Soap looked round, trying to figure out who was speaking to him.

Ghosts blurry face came into view, his senses coming too-- "-Johnny, get out of there." He watched a blurry fist come down, "SOAP GO." The words were heavy on his already beating skull, fucking hell... his body twitched as he pushed the heavy body off him. 

"Ghost.." He moved to crawl to him, but Ghost shook his head "Go Johnny, run."

His heart hammered as he looked toward the barrier, he nodded back towards Ghost before pulling himself over the barrier.

"STOP HIM." Graves yelled, he stumbled forward gun shots flying all around him, most narrowly missing save for one -- a bullet shot right through him, he fell hard scraping his knees through his pants. Holy shit.

He tumbled down, falling onto his chest, the dirt was turning to mud and caused him to begin slipping down the hill. He cried out as he tumbled, his body twisted and contorted, head banging against the loose ground.

He could do nothing but take the onslaught of pain being thrown at him.

The shadows calling to eachother became silent as he slid farther and farther away, finally coming to a stop he whined.

"Shi-t," he stammered, eyes wide and filled with tears. He placed a hand over his wound and forced himself up, the pain seared through his body as he got out of there, away from the heavy fire of guns. He was crying now, barely able to breathe as blood pooled in what he hoped wasn't his lungs - god damn it this isn't how he wanted to die. 

Making it to a wall he collapsed, wincing as he pulled his hand away he rasped staring at his blood covered glove, it dripped down and onto his pants staining the dirty brown red. His ears were filled with cries of a young woman, begging what seemed to be the shadows for mercy. Groaning he reached to the comm on his chest, switching the radios until there was silence. Sure Ghost would hear him he spoke into it, "This is- shit, bravo 7-1.. in the blind..." he winced, "How copy?"

He waited a moment, no response. "Ghost, This is 7-1, do you copy?"

Letting go of the comm he felt utterly alone, leaning his head back against the cement wall. He whimpered, "fuck,, Where are you Ghost?" knowing he wouldnt get a response, but needing to keep himself talking if he didnt want to die.

Pulling himself up slowly, he stammered into the alley way, two dead bodies of what seemed to be young men lay there - stiff and covered in blood. What a fucked way to go.. he couldn't help but feel sorry for the men. Pain flared up in his chest, he lost his balance and crashed into the ground, surely he must have a concussion now. He'd banged his head so much...

Struggling to get up his comm crackled to life, "Soap-- This is Ghost, how copy?" There was urgency in his voice, Soap could barely move at this point, crying out as he crawled forward.

"Johnny?" 

Wincing hard he forced himself to his knees, the pain was excruciating sending flares all over his body. He didn't want to move anymore, just wanted to lay there and cry. His comm crackled again, "Johnny... how copy?" 

A twitch of a smile pulled at his lips, so Ghost really did care huh. 

He pressed on the comm, "Solid." It was wheezed out but Ghost didn't catch it, "Thought we lost ya." Fuckin' brits.

On all fours Johnny crawled towards a car, grabbing onto the bumper to pull himself up and onto his feet. He leaned down, Shadows moving somewhere infront of him, he could hear them talking. Graves voice caught his attention..

"2-0.. Your men cordon this area.. Yeah? If Soap, Ghost or Hassan's here, let's keep em contained yeah?" 

And to think he actually started to like Graves. 

Bodies littered the streets, it was a scary sight honestly, nonetheless Soap crawled up to a couple of bodies and sat near them as Graves passed down the road - he nearly wretched at the smell. He was best to keep out of sight though, he wasn't able to fight in this condition. He crawled between cars and next to buildings, he was trying to get to the alley way Graves came from without being spotted.

"Oww" He cried, pushing himself to his feet. He looked around the area before leaning against the wall next to the alley way entrance, Ghosts voice startled him.. had he accidentally pressed the comms button while getting up?

"You injured?" It was stark, straight to the point. 

He felt like he should hide his injuries from Ghost, unsure if he would just leave him behind knowing his condition. He groaned settling for a half and half answer. 

"Whats the difference?"

Ghost chuckled through the mic, "Life and Death." With that he was gone again, Soap screwed his eyes shut for a moment before peaking down the alley way. Three men were at the exit, moving round a car and out into the streets. He hissed lowly, "Where are you, L.T?"

"Theres a church. Im heading to it, lets RV there." There was no fighting the way he said it, off in the distance he could see the makings of a church. He hoped he could get there before he bled out. "You'll need to improvise to survive, keep it careful and maybe you'll make it."

Graves voice brought him back to reality, shit, he peaked down the Alley again, "The shadows are on a killing spree. Fucking murderers." 

"Looking for Hassan."

Soap Tsked lightly, unheard by Ghost, "Hassan and us,  i heard them."

The shadows were threatening and forcing what seemed to be the cartel against the wall, questioning them while using brute force. It was sickening. Holding onto the wall for support he moved down the alley way and behind the parked car, the street was full of Shadows. He ducked against the car, hand flying over his mouth to muffle his cries of pain. 

All he could taste was iron, whether it be from him slowly dribbling out the blood in his lungs or from the blood covered glove pressed there.. he didn't know, he also didn't wanna find out.

"Do it." Graves commanded his men, a few gun shots going off as bodies hit the ground.

Soap grunted, "fucking hell.."

Graves directed his team around the corner, "found some dirty cops, lets go have some fun with them shall we?" He spit on the ground, team following him as he walked out of sight.

Now in the clear he moved forward, Ghost crackled alive in his ear "Advise you move interior, if you're not already. It's good cover."

"Copy."

Watching down the street he moved toward into an open garage, pulling on a door. Locked. "No joy.. doors locked L.T."

"Look for supplies- things you can make tools with." Always good with advice, Soap huffed out a laugh immediately regretting it as his chest lit up like a fire on christmas. "Welcome to Gorilla Warfare, McTavish."

Gathering some supplies he came back to the door, popping it open whilst breaking what he'd just made. The heavy movement of busting the door open made him pause for a break, he leaned against a table, unfinished food and chairs scattered. Someone left in a rush..

He heaved for a moment before continuing on, he crouched around the house, he could hear women and children crying and begging for help. 

"Don't hurt my children.. im begging you.. please.." A woman cried out, a small child screaming for her mother, they continued to cry out as a loud gun shot was heard. Soap winced, knowing he could nothing to help the civilians right now. He hurried out into the living room, moving around. 

"Take the kid, get him out o' here." Graves.. fucking hell.. atleast he wasn't sick enough to hurt the kid. A shadow began talking to the child, "Let's go, come on, you're with me," the child cried, "quiet, come on... shhhh-shhhh."

Graves laughed, "oh look what we got here, more policia. Cops, helping cartels." He paused, Soap froze and covered his mouth, "Let's show 'em how we handle corruption!! Yeah-"

"Happy to, sir." 

"El Sin Nombre, will kill you for this." The cop spoke, anger evident in his tone. Graves barely chuckled, "Oh, no, no. El Sin Nombre's no beuno right now, amigo."

"He'll cut your fucking head off-" A shadow kicked his face in, knocking him to the ground. Soap winced backing up and away from the door. 

"Shut, the fuck, up!" Graves spoke again.. Soap was to close. He backpedaled towards the stairs, limping up them and into an open hallway. "No more talking." 

A guy stumbled out of a corner, knocking into a table and collapsing. 

Soap was startled to say the least, "creeping fucking jesus.." he coughed, then winced. Graves could be heard downstairs, talking to the cop.. it didn't sound all to good. The cop threatening to rip their balls off.

Swallowing, Soap moved forward, toward the fallen man, he barely moved other then to offer a weak groan. Hissing he moved round him, he moved into a sheltered little closet area -- maybe a storage room? Either way a head lamp rested on the ground, 

Graves voice was loud and clear outside, though through the ringing he barely caught the end. "...Keep your head on a swivel for these Brits.. Take 'em dead or alive.. you know my preference."

Soap scoffed, he was no brit.. he was a proud scottsman. 

He focused on updating Ghost on his predicament, "Found a headlamp... not to far away from its.." he glanced back at the dying man, "original owner."

"Good. Careful with it. Can light your way but attract unwanted attention."

"Ouwff."

"Whats the latest?" Was there a tinge of.. concern in his voice? Soap must be loosing more blood then he thought.

Speaking of, he looked down at his abdomen, stomach and chest covered in blood and then some. The latest wasn't good, not good at all. He tsked himself, to hell with it if he was bleeding out, if he was so cold he could barely feel his fingers.. it didn't matter as long as he got where he needed to. He could get help if he just kept pushing.

"Mercs are killing everything in their path." Short, keeping his own problems out of it.

A scoff, "War crimes.."

"Yeah, makes me want to commit a few war crimes of my own.."

"Tyranny. It won't stand." Ghost was a cold blooded asshole but.. he believed in the peace of civilians so.. maybe there was some good in him.

Spluttering Soap knelt down, spitting up blood onto the wooden floorboards, no more then there was before he supposed. "You think we'll get a green light to go after these guys?"

"No more green lights, Johnny. We're on our own." 

That didn't sound to good.

A short few quips later, Soap found himself prying open another door, he found himself in predicament when a caged dog began barking at him. 

"Whats going on up there?" "Dunno, i'll go check it out."

"Shit's hitting the fan right now.." He looked around the room quickly, making an escape through the balcony. He lifted himself over the fence piece, "You see the caged dog?"

Judging by how high up he was, this was going to hurt -- especially since he was incapable of properly putting himself in a landing position. He gnawed on his lip, "Big Geezer. If he barks, shoot him and repo quickly--" No remorse.. "Don't get compromised."

With a pray sent to any gods listening, Soap jumped down landing hard on his side. He gritted his teeth together, fuck that hurt... he laid there for a moment, breathing in and out trying to lessen the pain bouldering in his side and chest.

Ghost crackled through, "Gimme a sit-rep."

Once again forcing himself to stand he groaned, "Outside.. Gated Alley."

"Stick to the edges and stay low."

"Copy."

Leaning against the wall for support he moved round, trying to find a proper exit. "You may get a brag rag for this," Ghost teased, the scott huffed out a laugh, "a medal?" "Chest candy."

"Thats all rubbish." He groaned, "Well, you said you wanted a win. Congratulations, you're a winner.."

Soap smirked, resting against a wall, "Away n' bile yer head..!"

"English, McTavish.." Ghost teased again.

"Sorry sir.. let me translate.. Go fuck yourself."

"Much Better."

Silence over took the two, Soap slinking down the wall to catch a much needed break. He pulled off his vest, revealing a bullet hole that went straight through the back and out the front. "So thats how you're bleeding then.." 

He groaned as he pulled out some duct tape, supposed to use it for something later but right now... he thought he might lose consciousness. He wrapped it tightly round his abdomen, not as good as gauze but would have to do for now. He slunk the vest back over his chest, tightening it with a grumbled laugh. 

He had to keep going.

"I've set up a sniper position in the church tower. Find your way there, and you might just make it." Ghosts most comforting words.. ever. Soap had made his way to the roof tops, watching as shadows beat up and killed three cops, they were berating them for working with narcos. It was brutal to watch.

Clicking on the comms he spoke quietly, "Graves is rounding up cops.."

A response was quick, "Hes judge, jury and executioner now."

The comms crackled before turning off again, Soap sighed as he watched the final cop get his brain shot across the cobble path. As the Shadows began moving away, Soap made his move, sliding off the roof and onto the ground. He winced and grabbed at his chest, the tape was rubbing the wound the wrong way.

Moving round the fountain he picked up a bottle, alerting Ghost to what he'd found, "Good for a distraction. Make it count, Johnny."

The shadows were talking about Ghost over comms, it caught his attention only because of the last sentence. "You're right, you won't see him, if you see him you're dead already."

Soap didn't know much about Ghost, but apparently his reputation proceeds him even now.

He had to get the attention of the guard away from the exit, he gripped the bottle a little tighter. Good for a distraction. He looked around, carefully planning where to throw it. Focusing on the fence he tossed it the guard immediately turning to check it out. 

"Tossed the bottle, worked like a charm."

"Told ya.. Pay attention and you just might learn something.."

Cheeky bastard.

Pain flared in his chest suddenly and he fell forward, barely catching himself. He pulled himself behind a planted bush, squeezing his eyes shut tight and begging for the pain to go away, begging for the ringing to stop. All he could see was white, all he could hear was ringing and that is not a good sign.

He took control of his breathing, and slowly the ringing faded away until he was able to hear the guard move back into position. Shit. He'd wasted his opening because of this stupid injury. He groaned, moving to his knees and looked round the area spotting another bottle. 

Hurriedly he picked it up, he aimed slightly farther away and threw it. The guard didn't react like he had before though, merely turning in the direction and shining his light. It was better than nothing though.

Quickly Soap slid by him and into an open doorway, he grabbed another bottle as well as some wax.. he was sure it'd help later -- lord was he right, he found some chemicals and Ghost was happy to tell him how to make a smoke bomb.

"A Toxic distraction."

Soap smiled, "Sick.. I like it." As long as he didn't hurt any civilians in the process he was all for it.

Ghost was quick to quip back, "Guarantee you they won't." The teasing edge was back, replacing the serious undertones he'd been replying with. Soap made his way out of the.. shop?.. He didn't quite know, he slid past another guard and down a back alley. A dark and cold back alley. There was no way out through here, he had to go by the guard. 

Not knowing if he'd actually win the fight due to his injuries, he rested against a shop door.. Mentally preparing himself to die in a fight against a shadow personnel. Pulling a bottle from the ground he took a deep breathe, slowly moving towards the Shadow. 

"Feeling weak are you?" Ghost startled Soap, causing him to take a few steps back and press against a nearby wall. "A bit shaky-Sir. Yeah."

"Graves tried to kill us, would stand to reason if you were a little off."

Of course yes, the trying to kill them through him off but the constant pain in his chest and arm was another factor -- a factor he wouldn't bother the Lieutenant with, but a factor nonetheless. "Find a stim- it'll give you a boost."

"Yes sir."

Slinking by the Shadow again, Soap moved into another shop, he found more chemicals and a mouse trap.. that could prove to be pretty useful.

He stumbled down a hall way, falling into an open door. A dead Shadow greeted him, "Ghost, you missing a knife?.."

"Several."

Soap was a bit to excited, "Think i found one."

A little cheeky Ghost crackled through the comms, "Some of the dead shadows are.. my handiwork."

"You came through here?" His voice cracked slightly, but he covered it with a cough. "On my way to the church."

"And you left me?" Soap wouldn't lie, that kinda hurt.. almost as bad as being shot in the chest. "I'm used to working alone." Ghost, ever so heartless.. 

"So much for no man left behind." He was a bit snarky in his response, but he was hurt that Ghost would just leave him. "Just.. get yourself to the church. 'M tryna keep you alive n' get you here in on piece. One of us needs to survive to tell the tail."

That one of them seemed more, and more likely to be Ghost with how hard it was to breathe. But as always.. Soap bit through it. "Taking a shine to me then?" Trying to joke his way through the pain.

"Not in the slightest." That was more then obvious. "Still got a lot of ground to cover."

With a sigh, Soap pulled himself through a window, he moved down the alley way finding a small black box. Opening it revealed some interesting treasures... "Seek and ye shall find.."

"Whatchya got?"

"Black powder." They seemed to jump over the last hurdle, going back to how they were before. 

Soap could hear the slight smile through the comms, "Nice, this could get interesting.."

Pulling out the tape, and mousetrap Soap fashioned a homemade mine.. so the mousetrap did prove to be useful. He took a moment before deciding to tell Ghost, "a man after my own heart." It was teasing, breathless and most of all not meant to be flirty.. but it struck somewhere in Soaps heart, he bit back a smile.

"Thought you'd like that."

"You thought right."

Now smiling, he made his way round the streets, a shadow blocked his exit. Slowly he creeped up behind them, having taken the knife with him, he launched up grabbing the shadow in a choke hold and stabbing him in the neck. He threw them down, pulling the knife out and taking their gun. 

The Shadows comms were going off, asking Shadow 3-1 to respond -- unfortunately he wouldn't be responding any longer. He shuffled away from the body just as the comms crackled again, "this is Shadow 2-7, im on my way to check out 3-1."

"Copy."

Soap hurried to move out of sight, pulling himself into a nearby shop and moving out and around. He dropped his head down a Shadow moving just outside the building, he crawled out the open door and into the streets. He sprinted across the street and into another building, Ghost coming to life in his ear. 

"You'll need to go through the tunnels, keep in mind sergeant theyre flooded. It's gonna be a cold swim."

"Yes sir.."

He'd waded through the tunnels, taking out guards in his way, taking breaks when needed. All this movement made him feel like he was about to pass out, but he was so close to finishing this, to being safe. 

"I've got your back sergeant, im you're guardian angel right now, stay safe."

Soap groaned, as of current he was tucked against a wall -- Ghost was keeping watch, heat flooded his chest. He pulled out an adrenaline shot, he'd had it tucked away just for this. For when he knew he wouldn't be able to hold himself up anymore. 

He popped the lid and slammed it into his thigh, eyes rolling back as relief immediately flooded his system. Easily moving to his feet he shuffled to the door, trying the handle only to find it locked -- with a grunt he manufactured a pry and weaseled it into the door. Popping it open only to met with a Shadow, knocking him on his ass and pointing a gun at his head. 

"GET DOWN!"

It was commanding, his ears rang from the brute force of being knocked in the head with the barrel of the gun. His sight went black for a moment as a gun shot rang out, blood splattering all over him and bringing him back to his senses. 

Another Shadow moved forward and he was quick to shoot them, crying out as he pulled himself to his feet. So much for the adrenaline shot, he thought to himself. Moving out of the building, shooting any Shadows that dared come to close. 

"Holy hell.. Ghost was that you?"

"Who else?.. Now go." It was urgent again, Ghost could tell they were on bought time, if they wanted to RV they had to move fast. 

Johnny moved quick, making his way to the church, he watched as Ghost threw himself over the fence. "That'll do, sergeant."

Soap smiled, he took a second before opening his mouth, Ghosts eyes widened "Shit Johnny-" But it was to late, a bullet rang through the air. Slicing clear through the centre of Soaps neck, he collapsed against Ghost, spluttering,, "No you made it Johnny, c'mon, you made it."

Ghost returned the fire, pulling Johnny with him to behind a car, the latter was spluttering and coughing, tears in his eyes. "G-ost, p-se" He cried hard as the pain took ahold of his body, there was no saving him from this. 

"Johnny, no come on, Johnny stay with me."

Ghost hated to admit it but he'd grown attached to the Scott, he imagined they'd be good friends after this - heaven knows Ghost needed one. "Johnny.." He spoke softly, wiping his sweaty hair from his forehead. 

Heavy gunfire was upon them, and as much as it pained Ghost to have to leave Johnny he couldn't carry the body with him. He couldnt save Johnny from this. 

With a soft smile, Ghost lifted his mask just enough for Johnny to see, if he could see at this point. "You did well kid, so well." With a pained smile, Johnny went limp in Ghosts arms. He was going to kill Graves for this, Johnny had so much to live for, he was so young and inspired.. with hatred in his heart he pulled down his mask and got to work, killing every Shadow in sight.

[robotnuts]

im so glad u watched 19 bc i truly have soooo many thoughts on like theres so much potential & really good scenes there but so many misses. the tex part is easily the best part of it though i still cant believe it actually happened. i kinda wish sarge's death was off screen like you see them watch him die but give him no final words sort of deal... i feel like it wouldve been a better plot device rather than the longer scene if sarge saying what he's feeling as he dies. sorry i keep thinking about that its my main thing i wouldve changed. well that and putting wash back in prison instead of a mental facility because i think a prison break with untreated mental illness couldve done more than ....... whatever the hell the wash scenes were. restoration is easily the best set up for fanwork ive seen in a while tho NGL the meta tucker concept is soooo fun i wish it got explored more. sorry im rambling in ur askbox now LOL

YESSS sorry for the late response. im glad rvb restoration dropped hwen it did so ic ould watch it irl with my girlfriend but it did happen to be during the most busy month of my year so obviously my blogging has been completely slacking. i really love this final line that apparently sarge was going to say. i think its more sweet and poetic than him spelling out how hes feeling about simmons and grif in particular

no yeah my biggest issue is just like. this felt like a vehicle for like, meta scenes saying goodbye to the reds and the blues, but the actual like "plot" of the season didnt really have any time to develop and had to just be quick weird scenes that were just kind of tonally dissonant and not really polished or treated with the same kind of care and deftness he was able to handle mixing the humor and plot elements of the recollections trilogy. both due to the runtime, him being out of the game for so long, and needing to do a full plot in one season instead of three. it really felt bare bones. which is fine it's just like, obviously you can see that its not the best, and i feel like if it was going to just be a vehicle for sappy goodbye to rvb as a property scenes i wish it had just gone all in and given us more interactions between the different characters. idk. im not really sure how id fix it aside from just having my own completely differnet version of their future in my head but ive already kind of written that post out for my post chorus vision lmao. dumpster baby forever...

META TUCKER IS REALLY FUN AND I COULDNT BE TOO MAD AT IT because it was literally a type of concept that epsilontucker riffed on after the open ended s13 (oh my god rip epsilontucker i think im gonna be sick). but his scenes again felt pretty jarring nad just put in there to keep the season moving and wahh why did they torture him for 10 fucking years ahhh scary AHHH. yeah, now that you said it it really does feel like. the bare bones of an incredible 250k word fanfic written by someone who has a different more serious tone than the original series like, put my guns in the ground style, moreso than an rvb season LMFAO but that's fine if anyones still in the fandom and cares to do that i'd love to see it. idk. im rambling. it was a good fun stream and i liked individual scenes but it was definitely all over the place for me

[sequesteredschizo]

cw // suicidal ideation & self harm 

thought too much about where I should post these words @ and where to do it if I did

Decided on here, both to challenge myself to be honest about how I'm doing and as a small private testament to myself, esp considering I can't guarantee I'll remember any of this later if I don't 

A few months ago I decided I was supposed to kill myself on April 26th 2024. I think something about doing that nullified certain anxieties of mine at times, for better and for worse. I thought the worst thing I could do that would ruin everyone I cared about was already going to happen, so I was able to loosen my grip somewhat on the people-pleasing and the social anxiety and the agoraphobia- maybe a sort of subconscious 'if something doesn't change, i will be dying. So I might as well try while I'm still around.' I've been callous and I've been unstable, but I also took risks (or, actions I that felt like risks to me) that landed me with more life-affirming results than I could have ever anticipated.

I sent texts I thought were annoying and stupid to people I wished I talked to more, I tried to eat like a well-adjusted adult person, I was honest with my dad about how hellish my disability was making my life for the first time. Etc etc. Anything to connect, anything to survive. I didn't care anymore. it felt like the end of the world. To everyone else it probably seemed like I was finally re-entering society, if anyone thought much of it at all (unlikely, imo.) At one point, I hurt myself worse than I ever had before, and without really meaning to, haven't done it since. It feels now like a microcosm of the bigger picture, just by coincidence. Doing better wasn't necessarily my intention, but it was a consequence of thinking I was fucking it all up one last time. Might as well throw all the chips in.

Last weekend I attended a wedding out-of-state for a relative I hadn't seen in years knowing id meet countless new faces and I didn't even freak out. And I was terrified, and I didn't want to go there and I didn't want to stay here but I did it anyways. Turns out I don't think I've ever felt so loved and welcomed and appreciated in my life. The people I reached out to on a whim, because what was the worst that could happen? Some of them actually respond back, fucking shocker. My dad is trying to stop pretending I don't exist. I'm a little less malnourished. So those are all good developments.

I feel like I reached up into an empty sky with the very last dregs of energy I had and by some miracle, just enough of the universe reached back. I don't and didnt want to scar and endanger my struggling loved ones because I couldn't be strong enough to deal with myself. It had to be my last option, after truly trying everything I could. I didn't even do much, and I didn't expect it to work. I didn't expect my favorite band to be dropping new shit on my due date. I didn't know that I would really honestly from the bottom of my heart not want to leave this fucked up horrible beautiful tragic world behind. 

I know there's always going to be a part of me that expects me to commit. it's always been easier for me to hurt myself than help myself. I've written a lot of suicide notes throughout my life. This is the first time I've ever done the opposite, I guess? This is supposed to be my promise to me that I want to live. I need to. Its really hard to admit that to myself. I'm pretty sure I can do it tho.

I think (and almost hope) that the handful of you who follow this stupid little blog wont read this, but I posted it here because theres too many people everywhere else. It's directed at myself anyway.

a distant yell into a cacophonous void, in hopes that typing it will act as a metaphysical vehicle for manifesting it in the collective subconscious:

TRANS PEOPLE DONT KILL YOURSELF!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[ruinsoftime]

Escaflowne Voice Meme

Okay, I guess it's my turn. This is a Written Meme instead of voice btw. The original questionnaire is here: Escaflowne Voice Meme.

01. Introduce yourself! When did you first watch Escaflowne? What brought you into the fold?

I already shared part of my experience in this post, so I'm gonna expand on that.

I was young and naive and in Junior High. There was an open tv channel that broadcasted anime shows all evening. One of them was Escaflowne, and I liked it, I mean, it's medieval! With robots! And swords! And the robots wear capes! But I wasn't a fan.

I saw the movie until I was in college and I loved it.

Years later, I always attempted to watch the series, because I thought I never watched it complete (and I never passed from the first episode in those tries). In 2021 I finally watched the entire series again… I didn't remember a thing hahaha and I discovered that I had actually seen it completely before because the only things I recalled were the "Aoi Hitomi" song and that Dilandau was a woman (and I spent the entire time looking for the womanly clues on Dilandau, with no success).

But you know, I really really loved the movie but I forgot how much I did it, it took some effort on my part to remember… hell, I even had magazine clippings in my room (still there) and used to draw Van and Hitomi, but all that is still lost in my mind and from the world (I rescued a drawing, not the great thing).

So here I am.

I already had a tumblr account but I guess due to inactivity I couldn't use the tags, so I better started anew.

02. Who is your favorite character and why? Was it love at first sight? Has any of their qualities or quirks swayed you on characters in other series?

Van. The guy grew on me after my second watch, it's easy to sympathise with him.

03. Which side are you on? What do you think happens Post-Hitomi when she leaves? Who do you think will be the next opposing power?

This is fanfic area, but I think Basram would get everyone in trouble if not kept in check. Zaibach could resurface years later, too. Or, you know, Hitomi returns and starts a fight :P

04. Least favorite plot point? Was there something you think should have changed? What do you think would have made it better.

I found Millerna and Dryden's love story boring (because there's none?). Van's wings are too corny (lol) What's up with Varie? I'd have liked to see more about the war. Escaflowne's customer service was ridiculous hahaha I had to pause when Folken performed the "let's make Hitomi and Allen a couple" mission.

Movie: I wanted to know more about... everything.

05. OTP? What kind of art and fiction would you like to see? What are some head canons you have for them? What is you NoTP?

Every question is like 10 questions lol This one is pretty obvious: Hitomi x Van of course. If you drop Folken in there I won't mind (not sure if Van or Hitomi would agree though). I like to read so I find fanfics very entertaining and comfy. I like art too so fanarts are welcome. Alright my headcanon is… Hitomi comes back to Gaea, finds her place in there, marries Van of course, and the whole planet is in peace.

NoTP: Van and Dilandau. Van/Hitomi x OC (unless you convince me).

06. What would you like to see in a figurative remake/sequel? Would you include more minor characters? Would you want a whole new story that could be a stand alone?

I've lived long enough to see failed sequels shit on a perfect story so I'd go for standalone story or a backstory, like Goau's life, Varie's story, Moleman's, Leon's adventures, and so on.

07. Movie, Series, Game, or Manga preference? What are things you did/didnt like of each?

I love the movie, I love everything about it except for it to be so short, unable to expand on the new universe they built.

The series is great, we'll always wonder what would Escaflowne be if only they got all the episodes they needed and didn't have to pack everything in 26 episodes. A monumental work.

Everything else is meh to me. I've read both mangas and watched the extra scenes of the videogame. I haven't read the LNs for obvious reasons.

08. Do your favorite impression! Bonus points if you can do a conversation with a scene cut in!

floats in the middle of the room inside a levistone, taking a nap

09. What do you think about the idea of a re-dub? What are your feelings about the current cast selection for Van (and others if more are introduced)?

I haven't seen the english dub but I've seen the latino one. I wouldn't mind a re-dub, even if I feel that nowadays actors lack heart. Van's VA, Jesús Becerro, died some years ago so I'd prefer to watch it like it is for nostalgia's sake.

As for the japanese cast… it's perfect, period.

I love Maaya Sakamoto's voice (Hitomi), a shame I don't like her music. Tomokazu Seki (Van) surprised me, he's also Kougami's VA in Psycho-Pass (I love his voice in PP) and I didn't notice until certain line he said reminded me of some other character (Gilgamesh).

10. Recite your top five characters by name.

Van. Hitomi. Folken. 5 is a lot.

Secondary: Gadess, Ruhm, Moleman, Balgus, Yukari.

Fin

[thesherrinfordfacility]

LWA here: I don't take the lockdown video as canon, as it's just too obviously a PSA. I do think there's more to be said about Crowley refusing to hear Chekhov's gun going off in the aftermath of S1, although that may be because I've now back-buttoned out of far too many supposed "fix-fics" in which Aziraphale has to abase himself before his much-abused demon. (Folks, they are equally to blame to the miscommunication pileup at the end! The yin/yang, single-character-split-in-half thing always manifests itself by them simultaneously botching things in their relationship! We are shown and told this explicitly! WTH?!) This is my own sequel to endlessly back-buttoning out of fics for S1.

I guess I'm one of the three or so people on the planet who got to the end of S1 and said, wait, there were two unambiguous betrayals during the course of this season, both related to trust issues, and unless they're discussed and resolved you cannot extrapolate a successful relationship out of this ending. Aziraphale betrays Crowley's faith that their friendship is different by not telling him about the Antichrist; Crowley betrays Aziraphale by manipulating him like /everyone else manipulates him/ by tempting him to kill first Warlock, then Adam. And there was a start to acknowledging the first during the bar scene, but there is no sign in the script that Crowley apologizes, mentions what he did, or even feels badly about it.* Fan attempts to excuse the manipulation usually repeat Crowley's own justification for the act at the park bench, but the script, via Madame Tracy, insists that "you can't kill kids" is a moral absolute. Crowley, and Aziraphale for going along with him, are in the wrong, end-stop. That was just such a massive stickle-burr for me in terms of conceptualizing how Crowley actually sees his own power in relation to Aziraphale's, and this season concretized that they are both suffering from trauma-related superiority complexes that they act out in ways that deny each other agency (Crowley by concealing information from Aziraphale about Heaven & Gabriel, then attempting to demon-handle him back into damsel-in-distress mode; Aziraphale by still being stuck in binary thinking patterns and offering Crowley a redemption plot he doesn't want).

*--I've seen exactly one analysis-in-fic-form that refuses to let Crowley off the hook, "Auguries of Innocence" (https://rainjoyswriting.dreamwidth.org/241857.html#cutid1), written by someone with experience teaching ethics. I think the author makes Crowley much too self-aware about what he did, but her conclusions about why he might be unable to bring himself to apologize are pretty plausible.

sliding this under a cut:

awesome, that's what i was kind of hoping someone would agree with me on (re: lockdown), mainly because from the feeling of the plot in s2 (plus the contextual characterisation already discussed about aziraphale's ability, vs surrender of his will, to protect himself/crowley's compulsion to overprotect), it felt rather extraneous of the canon narrative in retrospect. it felt like a fun, quirky PSA in isolation, but i didnt want to automatically discount it as not having its place in the story either if it indeed had one! so, im glad someone else was thinking what my gut was saying - that it is likely to be the former.

i get that many people are hungry for some kind of comfort following s2's ending (completely understandable), but i can't currently bring myself to read any fanfiction that follows the events of s2 because of this exact reason you've mentioned. frankly, i personally find it a little too uncomfortable that the resolution seen so far - in general terms, there are well-written exceptions - is for aziraphale to metaphorically prostrate and punish himself for the whole breakup, especially when i personally felt pretty much since ten minutes after finishing ep6 that there was more to it than aziraphale seemingly wanting to change crowley "into the angel he wants him to be", and rejecting him when he wouldn't. it's way more nuanced and complex than that. and every time i rewatch that scene, it feels so obvious that they are speaking words that on the surface fit together in terms of dialogue, but they are saying completely different things.

i love a misunderstanding-leads-to-angst trope, it's one of my favourites, and the way the dialogue was written in this scene to have so many interweaving and contradicting layers and meanings was a profound and immersive depiction of this. ultimately my end impression (until a point we get an actual Conversation in s3 that discusses these exact points) of the scene is that:

- aziraphale will always think he should and could do better and be better, even at the risk of sacrificing everything including crowley, and do so with only the greater good in mind... no matter if the greater good doesn't truly exist in the way he hopes or expects it to (and therefore is completely immaterial), and:

- crowley will always continue to keep and bury aziraphale in his own rage and pain, drawing him back in whenever aziraphale shifts to step outside of it, and do so because it's a constancy that has thus far worked in giving him purpose and a sense of being wanted.

there's way more to it than that, but those were the immediate first impressions i got. they may love each other endlessly, beyond understanding, and that's wonderful; but love alone is not enough to sustain a relationship of any kind. there has to be trust, yes, but also mutual respect, support for each others' true wants and needs, and a sense of wholly knowing yourself (even the things you wish you could change, or you dislike) so you know what you are giving to the other person. my perspective on being in a partnership is that your heart is no longer just your own, it becomes the other person's too - if not more - and you have to be someone that can be entrusted with it. neither of the characters give me the impression of having really learnt this yet, and have demonstrated on multiple occasions, including the ones you mentioned, that they haven't.

having a read of what you linked, this is exactly along the lines of why i think crowley doesn't want to recognise, or cant recognise, what he did in tempting aziraphale and manipulating him on the occasions that he did... because what would happen if he did accept it? and opened up the pandora's box that is bringing aziraphale's attention to it? how would aziraphale ever see crowley the same way again? id love to say it was the same lines along which i was thinking when i wrote the below re: saviour complex, but is far more insightful and eloquently put:

and also here, when talking in response to another ask of yours about I Forgive You:

essentially: that if aziraphale were to know why crowley does what he does, did what he did, if aziraphale received an explanation and a genuine apology for it, would crowley only be met with benevolence? or would he be genuinely forgiven in a way that is actually meaningful to him because it comes from aziraphale the person, not the angel? the latter would be too much to bear, i think. the irony however is that in not giving his shortcomings air, taking them out of the locked box he's crafted to hide them, he's occasioning further opportunity for misunderstanding between them.

trauma in whatever form is not a valid excuse to project that trauma onto someone else. it can be empathised with, but not excused. again, as always, at the risk of human-ifying two supernatural beings, it is entirely human to fuck up and do so, it's going to happen - that you hurt someone you love by keeping them in your pain. but it can't keep happening in a never-ending cycle, and has to have a breaking point that all parties actively learn from. this ground, them acknowledging having any feelings for each other, is brand new for them to tread on, but when it comes hand-in-hand with having millennia full of trauma, shame and pain, they also need to tread very carefully.

[sumbier0]

Just watched Nimona. Im feeling so notmal rn [lying throught gritted teeth]

I quite literally knew NOTHING when I decided that I will watch it.

Got suprised positively and felt so many feelings so many times. This was so enjoyable and just done with care? I have many thoughts but I dont know if I could put them all into comprehensible words. Just. All topics were handled beautifully.

I literally got attached to characters less than 10 minutes in. Help me

Some Spoilers beyond this Point

The villain. BOY THE VILLAIN. I hate her so much she got what she deserved <4 I loved how she was written. She believed eveything she was Fed. She lived in fear that consumed her and she was willing to kill innocents for that. She went so far she didnt even want to consider going out of her bubble. Also she could be classified as a twist villain, although its easy to figure out it's her. Even if its not a twist for audience its a good twist for characters + she gets so much time to shine too.

The ending. I understand how some people I guess could say its anticlimactic because Nimona comes back [we don't see her but Its pretty clear lmao]. Personally for me its not an issue, she went through so much and deserves to be happy too. And see that people like her now :] Although I wouldn't mind more tragic ending either, it just wouldve hit me with more sadness than a lot sadness -> sudden happiness spike

At the start of the film I was so so glad that Ambrosius wasn't the 'priveledged guy thats an asshole to the main character' and instead they were lovers :] But also at that point said 'I hope there wont be any falling out!'. Top 10 sentences said minutes before disaster

Also if you could've seen my reaction to nimona and gloreth stuff. Boy I went absolutely insane.

On the topics handled well. I think how they handled opression was really good. They showed how it affects everyone. Even the opressed themselves, that try to find a place in such society, try to have Faith in the system that fails them[ commoners, Ballister]. How at the earliest stage possible people are already influenced into such mindsets. How some people are so firmly set in those beliefs they wont even consider they're wrong. And also the worst of opression, violence, and how it not only hurt Nimona physically, but also how it scarred her mentally.

Some negative beliefs were reinforced for so long, and spawned different kind of negative beliefs. And opression

And I think throughout the movie, you REALLY get how ingrained negative beliefs are in everyones minds.

Further to me, the change of this whole kingdom for the better didnt happen too quickly. Trying exposing the Director ended with her quickly swaying people to her side again, when she played the monster card.people so quickly also believed that such a commoner as Ballister would kill the Queen, which probably wouldnt happen if it was someone form the Noble bloodline... okay its not related exactly to what I started talking in this paragraph. Fuck, people had to see how for this belief that monsters are terrible, the one in power is willing to kill them, along with the monster. And in this situation the monster saved them.

Like also those are circumstances that absolutely would lead to a change I think. There were probably some people in denial but I doubt for long? Authority of power and beliefs risked their people's lives with ease when it came to actual danger. Although the focus should have been on protecting the people, as it always was said before, in the end it all went into killing 'the bad'.

[Um i hope I put this into comprehsible words and that I got the meaning I wanted in there]

I enjoyed the animation, design and music too! Also this world was really interesting, medieval combined with futurism. Really neat worldbuilding!

And last thing, comedy was great >:]

Anyway I hope you enjoyed my incomrehensible ramblings. Bows