#<- maybe i'll explain that one maybe I wont

[pinktwinkiezoppo]

Current mood

[stupid-dyke]

stayed up til 3 when I have an 8am again. I do this because I hate myself so sos sososososososososo much. It's really funny because I don;t fall asleep in class thanks to my meds but I've noticed every time I go to class after 4 hrs sleep people act weird around me which is how I know im acting really weird. And I am so extremely angry at myself. I spent 4 hours. well 8 hours. Well all day. Pretending I'm going to do homework and distracting myself with various other things on my laptop or crying on the phone to my parents. Got zerooooo work done at all i stayed up most of the nihght for literally no gain whatsoever this is pure self harm. Which I do becauase again I hate myself. Because I didn't do my work. Which i won't do tomorrow either because i'll be so tired I wont be able to string a sentence together even though I'm supposed to give a presentation haha. My favorite activity is staring at the clock on my laptop getting later and later and later. new high score etc. Who's a hypersomniac now. Imagine how much easier this semester would have been if I'd gone to bed before 2am ever. I'm so fucking angry at myself I'm not sure I'll be able to sleep now even. If I fail my classes again my parents are gonna make me live at home forever and say im too crazy to live on my own. I know I was supposed to get a therapist but I hate them all so, so, so much. I think people get that job bc they feel powerful telling some pathetic person what to do knowing I literally cannot do it and will come back week after week admittingn failure and paying

I know I was supposed to take the new experimental FDA approved drug for IH but the list of side effects is fucking terrifying and I live and sleep alone so i really don't want to take a super powerful sedative that can make you stop breathing. So I'm gonna keep taking stimualnts and lying to myself that today is the last day I stay up extremely late for no reason.

[todayisafridaynight]

and if we got to see sawashiro daddy up on aoki just Once i think i wouldve cheered, applauded even

[corpsegold]

 I'm realizing that I use people like drugs. I get tolerance to them and then get bored. I never really turn up for them, I only pretend to when it serves me. I sometimes spend my energy on them to maintain the structure of the facade of the relationship but really I have no idea how any of it works and never really care about it intuitively. This might not be true all of the time but it's definitely true most of the time. I think sometimes I care about other people and can empathize, but 99% of my actions are entirely self absorbed, relating to how people feel about me and things.

How I make other people feel is not that relevant unless it relates to how they feel about me. How people feel about me is the most relevant thing period. This has been changing slightly with going to AA and thinking about practicing gratitude. I think sometimes I am kind even when no one is watching or would remember as well, it's just not my intuition to be like that.

This makes me a very unsavory person, even though I try to cover up that I’m this insecure and shallow. Even my family don’t like me, but I think that was true when I was a kid as well. This causes me to become very isolated- I struggle to make or maintain any relationships, even with other neurodivergent or addicted people for the most part. This causes me to drink to anesthetize, out of boredom, depression, social anxiety- missing the emotional regulation that comes from connecting with other people and getting perspective. I spend far too much time in my own head navel gazing and pathologizing myself. I’m obsessed with my own pain. I interact with people when it serves my fantasy, and get rid of them when I get uncomfortable, because I don't trust that they won't conspire to sabotage me, or because I don’t cope with any kind of perceived criticism well.

I’m realizing that the way I think is like, if someone is nice to me, it's because they fancy or are envious of me. This makes me distrust them because it means they’re dangerous, unless I’m drunk. If someone isn’t nice to me, it's because I’m awful and need to hide in a cave (or drink on my own.) Either way it results in drinking, but one of the big processes underneath it is being self absorbed in a paranoid way. I want to be a nice person. I’m excited for the journey to learn how to be, if it's possible. The way that I’ve been living has not been well. 

This explains why trying to be abstinent and engage with a program makes me feel suspicious of other people and want to retreat into drinking. Not because I enjoy the drinking (tho naltrexone has shown me that I do actually) but because it dims down how much I care about what other people think about me, letting me pretend to myself that I’m normal for a while. I need to find a safe way to deflate my ego without imploding, and get some real self esteem without becoming overtly grandiose- then people will like me even less. I have to learn how to manage my ego so I can tolerate being alive

[sardonic-the-writer]

𝐀𝐥𝐞𝐣𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐨, 𝐌𝐢𝐤𝐞, & 𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐀𝐥𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐀 𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐓𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐇𝐚𝐬 𝐋𝐨𝐰 𝐒𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐄𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐦 𝐖𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐈𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞

↳ warnings: mentions of self depreciating thoughts

↳ song: be nice to me—the front bottoms

masterlist!

𝐀𝐥𝐞𝐣𝐚𝐧𝐝𝐫𝐨

• He is the best at assuring you that you're beautiful; no matter the time of day. Flattery is one of his love languages after all

• Whispers sweet nothings to you as he hugs you from behind, doing his best to squash each and every negative thought that pops up

• Most of what he says is in his mother tounge. It's a lot easier for Alejandro to spill his heart out to you that way. If you know spanish, he just smiles as he buries his face in your neck—placing soft kisses along your skin. If not, he'll gently translate it with just as much love as the first times

• Even though he might be a villian, Alejandro wont stand to see anyone put you down. Anyone. Not Heather, Duncan, Mal, Chris; you name it. He'll shut them down with a quick witted quip, tight smile conveying his true emotions

• Is adamant that is he doesn't win the game, he wants you to. After all how could you not? You're smart and courageous and stunning and—

• "Okay okay Al. I get it." You shook your head playfully, sighing

• You're the only one that gets to call him that. It's the only way he won't shiver when he hears the nickname. Plus he likes how it sounds coming from you

• "Anything for you amore."

𝐌𝐢𝐤𝐞

• Mike is in absolute disbelief that you'd ever think you were anything short of amazing. I mean, really? You of all people thinking thst you don't measure up to others? Impossible. He just doesn't understand

• Mike is comforting in the aspect that he doesn't get it. One of the reasons he has a giant crush on you in the first place is, well, literally everything about you

• He adores you, and will go on small tangents about all the things he loves about you without even noticing

• "—and I mean don't even get me started on your kindness!" Mike laughed with heat tinting the top of his ears. He had been talking for quite some time now, not noticing that you had been staring at him with a greatful shine in your eyes

• Once you sit down and explain that it's a mental state, he just sort of goes. Oh. And then proceeds to hug you tightly. And I mean tightly. This guy has some strength on him—we've all seen how he nearly crushed Cameron that one time

• "I'll always be here for you!" He titters happily. "I think you're amazing no matter what!"

• Probably calls you awesome sauce anytime he notices you feeling down. It's so ridiculous that it just manages to cheer you up everytime

𝐌𝐚𝐥

• Durring All Stars, all Mal can think about is winning. He doesn't have time for pesky emotions like all the other peons. It'd just slow him down

• "Why do I care if they feel like dirt. It's not my problem they can't keep their eyes on the prize." Mal frowns at the confessional camera deeply. Normally, he'd be downright gleeful at the prospect of someone being thrown off their game. But he can only bring himself to glower

• For the sake up keeping up appearances, and only for the sake of keeping up appearances, he'll approach you this one time

• "Hey there buddy!" He dragged out the y in hey, hair flipped up on his forehead to look like Mike. "What's wrong?"

• Tells himself that he's only doing this to blackmail you later

• Cameras later cut to another one of Mals' confessionals. This time, he refuses to make eye contact with the lense

• "Maybe I helped them feel a little better. So fucking what." He glares. "It's not like I care or anything. Because I don't." Mal makes sure to emphasize that last sentence deeply

• He doesn't seem to mean it

𝐌𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐨𝐛𝐚

• His way of comforting you consists of taking his hat off and placing it on your head for you to wear. All while ruffling your hair

• Isn't opposed to sitting and listening to what's got you down in the dumps. He can't promise that he'll offer good advice, but the time spent with you is his way of showing that he cares

• Resorts to sly compliments and winks to try and make you feel better

• "Come on. Let's see that smile! Ah there it is, you beaut!"

• Later, he presents you with a nice rock from some excavating he had been doing for fun. Said it reminded him of you the moment he had dug it out

𝐒𝐯𝐞𝐭𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐚

• "Zis vill not ztand!"

• Svetlana immediately grabs you by the shoulders and brings you closer to her, an extremely serious look on her face as your eyes widen

• "You are ze best person Svetlana knows!" She furrows her brows. You begin to say something, but she cuts you off immediately. "You vil not slander your amazingness. Svetlana will not alow it!"

• Even if it was just a small self-loathing joke you made, or a giant trauma dump, she'll always act with the same intensity. Will not let you think for a single second that you're worth less than you really are

• Absolutely does silly tricks to cheer you up. Even pretends to fail a couple just to hear you laugh

• "Silly Svetlana!" She sighs dramatically from her spot on the ground, peaking an eye open when you're not looking to smile at the way you laugh

𝐕𝐢𝐭𝐨

• For once in his life time he stops flexing to listen to you

• Is absolutely baffled. Perhaps even a little bamboozled

• "Ayo, I know no one can ever measure up to tha Vito, but you're a close second." He smiles charmingly with his hands on his hips. It's his highest verson of a compliment

• Offers to take you out for a tan session at the lake. Insists that it always makes him feel better and that it will for you to. It's not like he's just saying that so he can see you in a swimsuit. Why would you ever think that?

• "Okay okay, you caught me. But it's only because I think you're smoking ho— ow!"

• Pretends to recoil in pain when you hit him, complaining about how strong you are. Is pleaded when you have to hide a smile at his antics

• "There we go sunshine! Now come on let's go. I know you're just waiting to get a peice of this action on the beach."

• You smile and tell him to shut up

[unluckiestmember]

Makima x Innocent! Reader

Characters: Makima, Kishibe (Mentioned)

Tags: Fluff, Developing/Established Relationship, Soft! Makima, dogs, worrying, Kishibe being Kishibe, denial of feelings and misunderstandings.

Warnings: Spoiler Warning for the International Assassins Arc and the Gun Devil Arc. SFW.

A/N: Soft Makima = Best Makima?

SFW

Makima is a controller. For her it is either her way or no way. And if you dare to defy her, she will be the last thing you ever see. 

She treats everyone like they are her dogs, toys and pawns in a larger game to win…

But not you. No, she treats you like an angel.

After missions and days at work, she will take you out to relax. No ifs ands or buts.

Gives you the best massages.

Isn't a fan of PDA. But if she feels threatened, she will grab you and show everyone who you belong to.

She won't force anything onto you unless important. She knows how timid you can be when making decisions.

She has no problem explaining to you her missions and tactics, though she will sugar coat some moments for your "safety".

Her dogs love you. They literally run in your direction when you go to Makima's home and just jump on you.

Yes, Makima is a little jealous of it.

Watches any movie you want to watch, good or bad.

If it's a horror movie, she'll hold your hand the entire time. And if there's a jumpscare, she'll hold you when you jump.

Loves when you get easily flustered but wont show it.

She'll literally stare at you with a small smile and quietly be in delight at your timid state.

Will ask about your day, which is something she doesn't do for ANYONE.

If you want a sleepover, Makima will do the whole nine yards. Endless snacks, a batch of good movies, bad movies and a bunch of blankets.

She only has ONE rule; Don't speak of what you two do outside of work to coworkers. You're her little secret. No one can have you but her. Not to mention she has a reputation to keep.

Will ask Kishibe, yes, Kishibe of all people, advice on how to care more and be better for you.

Will also ask how to tread lightly around you as to not scare you away. But will never admit it or say it out loud.

Say her eyes are beautiful or pretty. She'll melt just laugh and call you cute. Maybe even kiss you on the cheek.

In-Story (Spoilers Ahead)

When Makima fell for you, she thought she was sick.

So sick that she took a few days off of work to wonder what was happening to her.

She asked her higher ups and even Kishibe what was wrong in subtle ways.

They all concluded; she wasn't sick. She was in love.

But she didn't want to be. No, she wanted to just focus on Chainsaw Man and Denji! You were ruining her plans! You had to go.

So why couldn't she kill you?

She just couldn't kill you…

Though she continued to think her attraction to you was unnatural, she soon asked you out.

Say yes. Makima doesn't show it, but she wants you to accept her confession.

Though your relationship is not displayed around your co-workers, they know something is going on between you two.

They all think the same thing; "Good for her." "I'm happy for them." "She's dating someone? I thought she was just a scary emotionless woman!" "Lucky!"

Makima doesn't worry about anything.

So she's surprised she worries about you so much.

After your encounter with the Darkness Devil in hell, Makima was her usual quiet and mysterious self.

But Kishibe informs you she was worried sick when she found you.

And don't even get him started on how she was during the return of the Gun Devil.

She tries her best not to tell you her true motives with Denji, but if you give her puppy eyes she'll spill.

Please support her. The last thing she wants to do is kill her precious angel.

When you noticed her being extra friendly to Denji and Aki, your cute little head started to worry she would leave you for them.

She'll assure you in a sweet whisper that she only belongs to you.

Be on the look out for a jealous Denji...

"I'll admit. My motives will be seen as evil. But it is a necessary evil. I hope you understand... You have to understand. I know I can accomplish my mission, but it might be near impossible without you... Oh, I wasn't saying I-... Haha. Yes. I love you too."

Makima is a devil. A control devil. And could destroy the whole world.

But maybe. Just maybe. She'd sacrifice it all if it was for you…

Chainsaw Man requests are currently open! :D

Likes and retweets are always appreciated! I love you all, be safe and have a good day! <3

[azurlily]

Hello! May I ask for stalker/pervert yumeko x fem!reader (sfw And nsfw)

OH HO HO!! YES Y E S YESSSS!!! Sorry I haven't been active, mental health and all, but I'm doing somewhat better and this is one of the first I'm working on to get a good bit of stuff outta my drafts. This isn't all that dark, but I'm still giving a warning. Also(to anyone that actually reads these) this started stalkerish and developed into yandere territory. I apologize, but I couldn't help myself. CNC is briefly mentioned but not gone over.

Stalker!Yumeko Jabami x Fem!reader

Now, this is a somewhat unlikely situation. Yet, somehow, it still happened. So how did this even start, why is Yumeko following you home, why does she get all antsy when she cant be around you?

So many questions, so few answers. The only way to truly get Yumekos attention is to stand out. Not in a way she has already seen before, so there are few ways to do that.

You could have beaten her in a gamble, the higher the stakes the more interested she is. You could have possibly been a kind, and genuinely good person. People like that aren't seen as much at Hyakkaou, so it be someone she is very much interested in. Maybe you're a masochist and you lost to Yumeko, seeing you happy to lose would definitely turn her on and interest her...as long as you're not creepy like Midari.

Anyway, despite whatever peaked her interest about you...yeah you're hers now. So have fun. Yumeko is the last person you'd want to defy, I mean...have you met the girl? At first she isn't obvious about her recognition of you. No, she watches you, she even has others watch you for her. You, wether you're oblivious or not, will still notice odd behavior from those around you.

Maybe some of those ruder to you are nicer, maybe vice versa. It doesn't matter, you're going to realise at some point you're being tailed. When you do, that's when the icy hot hell that is Yumeko Jabami makes me debute to you. Or well second debute.

Before you learn all about her "nefarious" plans and she's still watching you creepily. She goes after you, in more ways than one. She watches you leave ethe bathroom, and go in. Yumeko just wants to make sure you're not being privately bullied...that's all.

She also follows you home, maybe she'll buy(just a reminder Yumeko is rich as hell) a car. One that looks like an everyday car, or an exact copy of one that lives near your house. You wouldn't suspect seeing your neighbors car right behind you...right?

Yumeko is fucking crazy, let's put that out there. I've more than likely said it once, but I'll say it again if needed. She. is. crazy. So after she's is caught stalking you, she wont lie. She'll tell you straight up, she's in love, well her idea of love. Her fucked up, disgusting idea of love. Yumeko is very blunt, she explains her intentions and what she wants. At least what she things she wants.

Whether you choose to date her or not essentially decides the outcome of your little interaction. Saying yes, immediately fucks you over, she no longer has to hide her stalker tendencies. Saying no, well she'll pretend she didn't hear it and the next day at school Yumeko announces your relationship.

She's also very touchy(yes, she's a pervert too) she likes putting her hand up your skirt and will smile. Yumeko likes to hig you from behind, why? Because that means she can touch your tits. Big or small, nonexistent or very obviously existant. She loves your chest, she love you, and therefore any and every part of you.

She likes to show you off, by that I mean she'll kiss and love on you while she's gambling. You just look so cute to her, shaking and looking away in embarrassment.

I feel like Yumeko as a stalker is giving her yandere tendencies, but toned down. She goes from stalker to the well known term: crazy girlfriend. She needs you round all the time, she cant gamble without you. She can't walk home without you, she hates leaving you.

You're her lucky charm, you make things better. She can talk about her sister, how she really feels. She doesn't always need to smile and act dopey. She can be anything without worry...and if you dislike something she cant just tie you up and have you miss a few school days...

Now, Yumeko is a less than savory person when you think about it. While she does her best to love you in every way she knows. It takes her a while, especially if you said no to dating her at first. She really cant help herself, she wants to show you things...but how can she trust you?

I'd say it takes months before she finally tells you everything, well everything that you didn't know. She trusts you to tell you hoe she really feels, hoe her fucked up mind decided you were her chosen protector.

Even if she was stalking you a lot to begin with. It was all in good faith, I mean look now. You two are inseparable, not that she let's you leave her, but that doesn't matter.

In her eyes, you're perfect, no matter the horrible things she's done. No matter how much she touches you in odd and somewhat disturbing ways. You don't leave, she'd die if you did. Yumeko Jabami, current heiress to the Jabami clan.

She has put so much effort into you, into helping you gamble, helping you with debt, helping you with class work. She cant leave you...and if she has to strike a deal for a student life plan. All to keep your with her. She will.

NSFW CONTENT AHEAD

Sex is something else with her. Yumeko being the person she is, I highly doubt she's a virgin. No, she's had her fair share of men and women. Learning that she was particularly interested in girls help in her decided what to do with her interest in you.

Yumeko knows how to work your body. She puts on the cutesy loving girlfriend act...then eats you until you're trying(and failing) to pull her head away. Yumeko loves oral so this just makes things all the more fun for her.

Now of course just because she favors orla doesn't mean she doesn't like other things. When you two start dating she no longer needs to watch you as you go home...no she can drive you home herself. And she can also make you ride a vibrator the entire ride.

Yumeko loves humiliation(especially the stalker/pervert version of her) the idea of you crying and shaking after you been riding a toy for hours. She's been laughing at the faces you make, the whines, she'll pull on your hair and call you a slut.

Maybe take a few pictures, she loves to look through them during class when she's bored.

Oh, but seeing you all needy in public riles her up too. You're horny in public, maybe at school? Bathroom. She'll fuck you in the stall and then take a picture so she can create and album of you in the future. She likes to write the exact date and time of your little game.

Going back to the humiliation thing, if you end up doing it in a school or public bathroom. Prepare yourself, she taunt and belittle you.

You'll be so shaken up from her fucking you though, you hear very little of what she's saying. Whether that is a blessing or a curse is entirely up to you.

If it wasn't already obvious, one of Yumekos universally favorite things to do is overstimulation. Seeing you beg for mercy(that you will not be getting) after 5 orgasms is the best thing to ever grace her ears. It's an intoxicating sound, keep making it. The more you beg for mercy the longer it'll take for her to even want to stop.

Yumeko is a dominant and sadistic person in general. That goes over to the bedroom too. We see Yumeko get horny off of gambling, so she most definitely does a small coin flip or some form of small gamble.

It could decided whose on top(even though in the end you'll be bent over her knee crying her name), maybe it decides what toys you use, maybe if you win the gamble Yumeko wont punish as hard...

"So good for me, my good girl! Aww, are those tears for me? Thank you, I'm glad you know you place, sweet girl!"

She likes to mix praise in with her degradation. Calling you a mixture of darling, baby, good girl, sweetie, sweet girl, my love, sweetheart, princess(her favorite), ect. She has an extremely large variety of words for you. In and out of bed.

Stalker!Yumeko most definitely has a consent non-consent kink. I am not interested in getting into that unless specifics asked. Do with that information what you will.

Anyway, Yumeko and cat ears are like the ocean and salt. You can't really have one without the other. While Yumeko uses her money to buy you expensive lingerie sets, she also buys you cute costumes.

Maid, puppy, kitty, ect. She will dress you up with dog ears and an anal plug tail, or cat ears and an anal plug cat tail. Maybe even a bunny suit...definitely a bunny suit. Yumeko will also dress up if you ask, anything you want.

If you like the idea of a cute bunny girl dominating you until you (s)cream... Yumeko can and will do everything to set that fantasy up.

Now aftercare with Yumeko is an interesting situation. At first she doesn't know what it is, no matter if she's been with men or women. Top or bottom. She's never understood why she needed to care for someone. Mainly because she never cared for the others like she does you.

Yumeko loves you, therefore she does research into aftercare. Mainly out of fear that you'll slip into sub drop. She does her best with food and comfortable clothes, a warm bath and good television. She knows that isn't all that's required though, she reminds herself that you need to reminded you're loved.

All in all(and I do genuinely believe this) Yumeko is a good lover. Stalker!ver or not. She does love you, Yumeko shows her love to those she cares about. It's different and sometimes weird, and sometimes it's completely stupid and makes her look dumb. She does understand things better than you'd think.

Hi I'm updating again. This is one of the many in my inbox, after I get down to a decent and not so overwhelming number I will begin to open my inbox(commissions will stayed closed. You can request like normal when I open requests again, I'd like to build a bigger platform before I do commissions.

If you want to be told exactly when this comes out I'm now willing to @ you. So just ask in the comments and I will add you for every post after this one.

[minnielvr]

cold chocolate - kim seungmin

˚ ༘ pairing bf! seungmin x fem! reader

˚ ༘ genre fluff, angst!!, seungmins a bit of a meanie :(

˚ ༘ wc 3.4k

˚ ༘ note never writing smth this long (okay 3k words☠️) again idfk how sum ppl do it😭 sorry if this bad guys i cant write rlly good🦦merry xmas!!!

"hey y/n can you come out here?" seungmin called to you from your guys' living room.

"yea whats up babe?" you went over to the couch and sat next to him.

"promise you wont be mad?" he looked at you and raised a brow while grabbing your hand.

"oh god seungmin what did you do now?" you chuckled. obviously you thought that whatever he was going to tell you wasn't that shocking and he was just exaggerating, but you were so wrong.

"no y/n this is serious."

"o-oh okay. uhm whats wrong?" you were starting to get nervous now. does he want to break up? did he cheat on you? a million thoughts raced through your head but not one of them was what he was about to tell you.

"i'm not gonna be home for christmas.." he said it so casually as he looked down in his lap.

"oh."

now usually missing holidays wouldn't be such a problem for you two, except christmas. you guys dont really celebrate anything other than valentines, chuseok, and birthdays, sometimes you guys dont even celebrate birthdays. but christmas? it was a must. you were going to go back home to your family with him for the first time. he had even said yes. now all of a sudden he cant? whats more important?

you inhaled a shaky breath and asked, "why?"

"well you know, we have practice to do, and we have to record some things. so i'll be staying at the dorms." he shrugged and let go of your hands. thinking you were fine.

now that pissed you off. practice? recording? he couldn't skip one week of work for christmas? he was never like this, he has never put his work over you.

"seriously seungmin?. you cant just skip a week of work for christmas? you're putting 'some practice' over me?" you looked up at him with an open mouth.

"no y/n, i cannot." he glared at you. why was he giving you attitude all of a sudden? its not like you're the one who will be missing christmas.

"care to explain why?" you crossed your arms.

"dont you get it y/n? my work is harder than yours, you literally do nothing but sit down at a desk all day and book peoples appointments," he slowly started to raise his voice. "you dont get it all. i cant just be home all the time to give you attention. since when were you so clingy?"

you stood up from the couch and backed away from him, scared of him yelling at you. were you really that annoying? your eyes started to water.

"seungmin wh-why are you getting so mad? i'm just asking you to take a week off for christmas, im sure they'll let you. beside you need a break too." you said while looking down, trying to avoid eye contact so he couldn't see your tears.

"i'm mad because you're annoying! i dont want to take a week off. i cant be with you all the time y/n. leave me alone." he turned to the tv and turned it on, acting as if nothing happened.

at this point there were tears running down your face. how could he be so rude and say something like that? sure you guys have had arguments before and said things, but never like this. he the level-headed one in the relationship. he always keeps his cool during arguments because he knows how upset you get.

maybe it is your fault though. maybe you ask for too much attention and let him do all the work in the relationship. maybe you should leave him alone until christmas is over.

"okay. i'm sorry that im too clingy. i'll just leave" you turned around on your foot to go get your backpack with all your things. you'll stay with a friend or something. maybe you were overreacting a bit but you didn't really care, how could your boyfriend just ditch family plans for christmas like that?

"yea whatever, i dont care" and he dismissed your statement just like that.

now that hurts.

one of your best friends since you were 5, areum, was jeongins girlfriend. you and her were out one day and saw the two of them together, jeongin asked for aerums for her number first and seungmin asked you out a few weeks later. the rest is history.

you just arrived to aerums house and she graciously welcomed you in. seeing the tear stains on your face and your nose red, she figured you had walked here. she was correct. on the way out of your and seungmin's shared apartment, you had forgotten your car keys. but by the time you realized you were already too far down and didn't want to go back up to grab them, especially because seungmin would probably still be in there.

"so? tell me what happened babes" she guided you over to her couch and sat down next to you.

you explained what had happened and she fully agreed with you on your view of the whole thing. i mean, if he already said yes to the plans, why would he switch up all of a sudden? and seungmin would usually take a sick day or soemthing if you asked, he cared about you a lot. you're not saying that he has to prioritize his work over you, but the least he could do was tell you in a nice way or just take a few days off for christmas.

"but wait. that doesn't make sense.." aerum furrowed her eyebrows.

"huh? why?" you looked up at her.

"jeongin said that they have a little christmas break or something like that. i mean, we aren't going anywhere but he said that the boys have no schedules and practices," she looked at you nervously. "do you think that maybe seungmins lying to you?"

well he definitely is, theres no question about that. you just didn't want to believe that he would actually lie to you about something like this.

"n-no he would never..," you looked down in your lap. "oh my god he doesn't want to see my family. he probably thinks i'm rushing into it right? but we were supposed to go to his parents house after that, how is that fair?" you were coming up with all these excuses to not make him look like the bad guy in this situation but there really isnt any. he lied to you and called you cling and annoying. thats the hard truth.

"hey hey calm down its okay," aerum side hugged you and started rubbing your shoulders. "i'm sure it's just a little problem with miscommunication hm? it could be fixed like this." she snapped her finger.

"y-yea of course." you hiccuped. "can i just stay here for the night though? i don't feel like going back yet." you looked up to aerum with wide, teary eyes.

"aw of course honey." she squished your cheeks. "go shower and i'll get some food ready for us. we can watch a movie." she smiled at you and tapped your back to usher you to the bathroom.

you smiled and agreed with her and went to shower. turning the water to borderline boiling so you could release all your thoughts.

you put on some of aerums spare clothes and stepped out of the bathroom and walked to the main room. she had the movie 'home alone' waiting to be played on the tv. she knew it was your favorite christmas movie.

aerum saw you step out and turned her head back over the couch to face you with a big smile on her face, beckoning you to go and sit next to her. you could see a plethora os sugary and salty snacks sitting on the little coffee table in the middle of the room. she really knew how to cheer you up.

you guys ended up watching both home alone movies and ate almost all of the snacks. you guys also fell asleep next to each other on the couch. which was typical for the two of you when you ahd movie nights.

you were the first one to wake up the next morning. rubbing your eyes and aerums foot being the first thing you see was not so pleasant. the sun was shining through the window and you could hear the bustling city of seoul outside. what time was it?

you sat up from the couch while gently taking aerums leg off of your lap. you bent down to grab your phone to see that the time was..2 PM?!?!? seungmin must be worried sick!

you turned to the side and looked at aerum sleeping so peacefully. a little drool coming out the side of her mouth.

"aerum! hey! hey! wake up! it's 2'oclock!" you violently shook her shoulders.

she hummed and swatted your hands away from her body. telling you to shut up.

"as much as i would love to stop doing this i still love you and you have work today. so...get. up." at this point she had opened her eyes and you were staring straight into them.

"oh my god! i have work!" she kicked the blanket off her feet and scrambled to get up off the couch. running to her bathroom to go shower and get ready.

"hey wait! i was gonna go in there!" you chased after her but to no avail. she had already got in and locked the door.

"i know you have boyfriend problems right now but im already late for work! which one is worse y/n?" you could hear her starting to turn on the shower.

"fine, you win." you lightly kicked her bathroom door in anger.

you headed to the kitchen and opened the fridge, looking for ingredients to make breakfast for the two of you. there was nothing inside the fridge except some eggs, bread, butter, and milk. how did aerum and jeongin even survive in this house? at yours and seungmin's apartment, the food inside the fridge and pantry is always stocked. you guys go grocery shopping together too, just to make running errands a little more fun. sometimes he would ride the cart trying to run away from you or sneak in some extra snacks that you guys certainly didn't need to spend so much money on. but thats what made it fun. those little quirks are why you loved seungmin.

as you were reminiscing on those little memories, you heard a door to the apartment open. looking towards it, you saw jeongin walk in. since you started tearing up thinking about yours and seungmins relationship, you quickly wiped them when jeongin came a little closer to you.

"y/n? oh my god! seungmin is so worried about you! you should go to him. like now." he looked genuinely concerned.

"y-yea i should haha," you looked towards the eggs cooking on the stove. "just make sure you keep on eye this food though. me and aerum woke up late so while she showered i figured i could make me and her some food. but i'm leaving now. also you guys should really go grocery shopping." you laughed at him while packing up your things.

he frowned at you and opened the fridge "hey it's not that b-maybe it is..."

aerum walked out of the bathroom wrapped up in a towel and looked at you wide eyed. she heard you talking to yourself so she decided to come out.

"damn babe" jeongin turned towards aerum and looked at her while raising his eyebrows.

"jeongin! what are you doing here! you weren't gonna be back until like...2...oh." she looked at the clock and now realized it was 3. "oh my god i'm gonna get fired!!"

"chill out aerum, i'm sure one day won't do anything" you chuckled at her over exaggeration.

"okay y/n listen," she went up to you and put her hands on your shoulders, staring you dead in the eyes. "you back in your apartment and be very clear to seungmin that you're sad and man and whatnot. be confident and don't cry." she pursed her lip at you.

"okay! got it. now go finish getting ready so you can leave before jeongin makes you stay!" you winked at her and left her apartment.

you were in front of your apartment door, giving yourself a pep talk about why you shouldn't be scared to go in there and confront seungmin. communication is key right?

you opened the door and were met with an empty house, no sign of seungmin anywhere. maybe he was sleeping? they didn't have any schedules today if you recalled correctly.

you walked towards your guys' shared bedroom and opened the door to be met with a sad sight. it was seungmin, curled up in the bed, holding onto your pillow. he seemed to be asleep and you didn't want to wake up him up. you were still mad at him, but the sight made your heart clench.

you went to your dresser and set your bag down. then you went to the bathroom to do your skincare routine since you hadn't gotten the chance to do so at aerums place. seems as though that woke seungmin up because next thing you know he's walking up to bathroom door that you forgot to close. you saw him behind you in the mirror.

"y/n?" he came closer to you and wrapped his arms around you. "i-i thought something happened to you when you left, i got really worried y'know..."

"well, i'm fine see? no need to worry." you unwrapped his arms from around your waist and stepped away from him. you appreciated the gesture but he's acting so normal, as if nothing happened between you two.

"oh...okay." he got the memo that you wanted to be left alone, so he left the bathroom. this time closing the door.

you were conflicted. you were mad at seungmin and he really hurt you. plus, the holidays were coming up and you didn't want to be in a sour mood for it. but at the same time, you could see he felt bad. him just initiating physical contact and being the first one to talk said a lot.

you see, both you and seungmin were both very prideful people. that means that when the two of you argued, instead of being normal and talking it out a few hours later. you guys stretched it on for 1-2 days before either of you came to apologize. communication was something your and seungmin's relationship was heavily lacking.

you decided that you would wait for seungmin to speak to you. and if he doesn't then well, you'll cross that bridge when you get there.

once you finished up in the bathroom, you made your way out to your bedroom and saw that seungmin was curled up on the bed with his phone.

"thought you had practice seungmin?" you crossed your arms and raised your brow.

"o-oh well you know i decided to skip today because i was so worried about you and i was waiting for you to come home." he made up an excuse.

"well im fine so, you should probably get going now." you patted his back and shooed him away.

you guessed that was his breaking point because then he turned around to face you with tears in his eyes and said

"y/n please...i'm sorry. i lied okay? i don't have any schedules or practice for the next whole week." he looked down in shame.

you already knew that so it wasn't that much of a shocker. but it really hurt coming from him.

"why would you lie to me seungmin?" tears were now starting to well up in your eyes. "i'm sorry if i rushed you into meeting my parents. it's just that we've been together for 2 years and you never got to see them except on calls so i thought it would be a nice trip for us...." you wiped your tears.

"no love trust me thats not the reason at all." he sat down next to you in the bed and took your face in his hands.

"so then why did you lie to me and call me clingy and annoying?" he winced when you mentioned what he called you. he really didn't mean to. he doesn't think that about you at all. it came out of nowhere.

"because y/n....i was scared to meet them. i thought that maybe they would think i wasn't good enough for you." he looked down in his lap.

"seungmin why on earth would you think that? my parents already love you and they've seen you on call. they practically adore you." you took his face in your hands now. "seungmin no one would ever think that about you. you're perfect in so many ways and you deserve me just as much as i deserve you, if not more."

"y/n how can you say that when i said all those things?" he was referring to when he called you clingy and annoying.

"because i know you didn't mean it baby. it did hurt a lot, but it's nothing you can't make up for." you smiled at him. "i know you've been a little stressed with all the end of year activities and stuff. but you're getting a break now! enjoy it."

"i just feel so guilty for lying to you and saying those things y/n, i truly am sorry. how can i make it up to you?" he looked at you wide eyed.

"cuddles and kisses. but we can do that after we pack since we're leaving in 2 days." you giggled.

seungmin pulled you by your waist into a hug and kissed the top of your head. "you know i love you a lot y/n, right?"

"yes i know that baby, i love you too" you smiled up at him. "now! lets get to packing!" you got up from the bed and started pulling clothes out of your drawers. seungmin groaned, not wanting to get up from the bed.

it was christmas eve and you and seungmin were at your parents house. they were thrilled to see him and loved him very much. not failing to make him feel very deserved.

you guys were all sitting in the living room and it was 11:30 pm. your parents decided they would go to sleep and give you two some alone time. you guy's both said goodnight and waited for them to leave until you started talking.

"so, having a good time so far?" you turned sideways to face seungmin.

"of course, the best time even." he smiled at you. "wanna watch home alone? i know it's your favorite and we didn't get to watch it back at home."

"yes! i'll go make some hot chocolate for us." you hopped off the couch and made your way to the kitchen to boil some milk.

it's been about five minutes and the milk was still boiling. seungmin came into the kitchen to keep you some company. he walked over to where you were by the stove and wrapped his arms around your waist from behind.

"could this thing be any slower?" he whispered right into your ear.

"ugh, i know right. i don't even care anymore," you turned off the stove. "we can have cold chocolate i guess." you started pouring the milk into yours and seungmins cups.

"anything is good when i'm with you." he kissed the side of your neck and swayed you side to side.

you giggled and turned around towards him and said "awww look at you being all flirty" you teased.

he shrugged his shoulders. "it's the christmas spirit i guess."

you then looked at the digital clock behind seungmin and it read 11:59.

"oh seungmin look!" you point behind him at the clock. "it's almost christmas! in five....four....three....t-"

he pulled your face towards him and brought you in for a kiss. he rested his hands on your hips and then pulled away. you looked up at him with wide eyes.

"man, i wish it was christmas everyday if you're gonna act like this"

he chuckled. "merry christmas y/n." he pulled you into his chest and rested his chin on your head.

"merry christmas seungmin."

[alliovera]

Hellloo!! May I request a (platonic obvi) wukong x child monkey reader? Maybe she gets found hurt and wukong gets attached taking care of him,like he gets a kid! Cuz wukong as a dad would be silly!!:3 (I'll send a romantic ask after this,wukong is so cute)

THANK U SM FOR REQUESTING! I really hope you like this and sorry it took some time </3

gn!child reader

(Slight crack)

He knew he probably shouldn’t have promised to take care of you, but he couldn’t resist- you were just so cute! Despite everyone telling him it was a bad idea, he stuck to his role as your new ‘dad’.

And he never regretted it … until your first tantrum.

The lady bone demon caused a lot of destruction in her pursuit, and your family just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. All things worked out eventually as you ended up being saved by the Monkey King and gang.

At first, you were wary of him. A random, loud Monkey trying to claim being your father? Weird! But over time he earned your trust by actually (surprisingly) not sucking at parenting.

……

You cried and kicked as Monkey king struggled to figure out what to do. You had never acted this way before! It was all his fault though. You wanted to go into Megapolis and play at a park, but he just wasn’t in the mood to fly alllll the way over there!

Honestly, he would’ve just gotten up and taken you if he knew it would end like this. He’s so stressed as never having been on the receiving end of a melt down (usually its him throwing the fit).

In desperation he dialed Mk’s number, letting it ring for a few seconds before his friend picked up, “Hey Monk-“

“-Kid! You gotta help me! They wont stop crying and screaming and.. and they won’t listen to me!” Wukong rushed out. Your screams in the background told MK all he needed to know.

He laughed, “What did you do?”

“Nothing! Why is it always something I did?!” He sighed and caved - explaining his laziness.

“If you don’t wanna take them, offer them something as compensation. Like a snack or something… i dunno?”

Wukong ducked as a doll wizzed by his head. “I tried that already! Didn’t work obviou- OW!” He shouted as a small monkey figurine hit target.

That was it! He quickly finished up his conversation with Mk and ended the call, going over to try and sooth you for the tenth time.By then your tears had dried and your sadness became little baby anger. You gave Wukong the meanest glare you could muster (it did nothing as it was too cute to be scary).

The two of you stood in an imaginary duel, no one wanting to make the first move. After a bit, Wukong surrendered and slowly approached you. He crouched down to where you were sitting on the floor, “Look, i’m really sorry but we can’t go..” He panicked when your face scrunched up again and tears started to form, “Butbutbut! We could always call up uncle Macaque and have him take you!”

That finally put you in a better mood as you jumped up and raced around to try and get ready. Wukong smiled slyly and patted himself on the back for another successful day of parenting. (You were happy and he got to inconvenience Macaque. A win win)

[Feedback and critique is appreciated!] :D

[bonny-kookoo]

Chimmy Guardian Angel who has to endure having to guard the dumbest clumsiest human girl in existence AU 😂😂

There's rules he has to follow- he can't save you from every little thing. So he knows, deep down, seeing you getting your hand stitched up isn't his fault at all- but in a way, he feels upset at it, nonetheless.

His task is simple- make sure you don't die. That's all he's got to do, at least until the gods above can figure out why you're just so cursed with bad luck all the time.

From cars constantly almost running you over, to stairs being your worst enemy- life seems to constantly try and kick you out any chance it gets, and it's become such a problem, that you've now been given Jimin- a guardian angel sent down to earth to make sure you wont meet your end earlier than you're supposed to.

But good lord, is it tough.

"It's gonna leave a scar, won't it.." You pout, watching how the nurse cleans up your wound before she puts something on it to cover it. Jimin is holding your other hand sitting close to you, sighing.

"A scar is better than anything worse happening." He gently scolds. "How did you even manage to do that?" He worries.

"I don't know.. I wanted to cut the cabbage but the knife slipped.." You sheepishly explain, making the nurse giggle as Jimin shakes his head.

"Just.. next time, let's cook together, yeah?" He suggests. "I live pretty much next door. I'll help." He tells you, and you nod.

"Thank you Jimin, I really appreciate it." You offer as a thanks to him, smiling.

Which is another big issue.

Jimin isn't supposed to connect with you any closer than necessary- but you're just too sweet to deny, and he can't help but let your soul touch his own. By now, he's sure that even the higher up's have to have noticed his growing infatuation, and he's not sure why they haven't scolded him already for it. He knows it's wrong. As an angel, he's not supposed to fall for you.

It's not meant to be. And yet, he's probably already in too deep anyways to back out now.

Especially when he helps you finish cooking later at your place, fleeting touches lasting a bit too long, smiles sent your way a bit too kind, teasing jokes exchanged a bit too suggestive to be something other than obvious flirting. He's always waiting for someone to step in, someone to remind him that what he's doing is nothing but a sin-

But no one ever does. No one ever pulls him away from you, neither when he's right in front of you, or when his hands move to place themselves on your cheeks, nor as he kisses you, lips stealing your breath and heart at the same time.

And even as he goes further later, there's no one taking that from him. As if they allow it.

And maybe, possibly, they do.

At least for now.

[doe-eyed-fool]

Prey | Chapter Three

Alastor x Fem!Reader

"Mimzy! How's my favorite flapper girl?" Alastor greets the shorter woman as he strolls into the lounge. Mimzy was at the bar, in the middle of a drink when she saw Alastor. A bright smile found it's way to her face. "Alastor! What brings you by?" She asks before turning her attention to the bartender. "Hey, a round of whisky for me and my good friend here." She tells him. 

Alastor took a seat next to her. "I actually wanted to speak to you about a friend of mine. You know her, Y/n L/n. She's looking for work, you see. Something new, something that can really turn her mundane life around."  He explains. "Oh?" Mimzy raises an eyebrow. "You suggesting I let her preform? She good at singing and dancing?" She asks. "I can't just let her preform, just because you like her." A small smirk fell on her face.

Alastor decided to ignore her teasing. "She's as good as they come." He says. "Listen, I'm going to level with you Mimzy. I've been trying to get Y/n out of her unfortunate situation for a while, and every time she refuses my help. Stubborn one, she is. But this is something she's actually willing to let me help her with. I promised her I'd at least talk to you about it. But I assure you, if you give her the chance, with time, she will be brining in all sorts of people to your lounge."

Mimzy hummed as she thought about it. "I guess there's no harm in letting her try." She shrugs. "I've only met her a maybe twice, but she seems like a decent gal. And I trust you Al, if you say she's good, then she must be."

"Excellent! She'll be ecstatic to know you said yes." Said Alastor with a grin. "I haven't said yes, yet. I said I'd give her a shot. She'll have her answer, once I see her in action." Mimzy corrects him. "Now, while you're here..." She hands him a glass of whisky. "Let's enjoy the rest of the evening, shall we?"

You walk inside your apartment, exhausted from today's shift. Lot's of people came in, and you were kept on your toes throughout the whole day. Right now, you wanted nothing more than to just sleep. However, the knock at your door would prevent you from doing so. With a groan you walked to the door and opened it, annoyance clear as day in your face. Upon noticing who was on the other side, your mood quickly shifted.

"Alastor?" 

"Good evening, Y/n. May I come in?" Alastor asks politely. "I have wonderful news, you just have to hear." You nod your head and stepped aside, allowing him to enter. Shutting the door, you approach Alastor with curiosity. "What is it?" 

"I spoke with Mimzy tonight, and she said she'd give you a chance." He tells you. You almost couldn't believe it. Almost. Of course Alastor could get someone to go along with what he wanted. Rarely was there a time someone refused to hear him out. And now, thanks to him, you might actually have the chance to achieve your dream. 

"Al, you mean it? She wants to give me a chance?" You ask. Alastor nods. "I suggest you tell your boss, you wont be making it in tomorrow. Because she wants to see you first thing in the morning." 

"What?" You gasp. "But that's so soon!" 

"The sooner the better, no?" Alastor chuckles. "I'm sorry about the short notice, but she wouldn't accept any other time. She's a busy gal, she says." 

"How am I going to explain this to my boss?" You ask worryingly. "I could always explain it to him." Alastor smirks. "Explain that you're moving on to bigger and better things. Explain how he was always a slimy, no good excuse for a man, and you deserve better. And how-"

"Ok, Al. I get it." You chuckle. "But no, you don't have to do that. I'll talk to him." 

"Oh, Y/n. Always wanting to do things the hard way." Alastor shakes his head. You just shrug. 

"Thank you, Alastor. Really, I don't think I could have done that on my own." You say with a soft smile. "Anything for a dear friend." Alastor tells you. Your smile fell slightly and you felt a light stab at your chest. You ignore the feeling and continue. 

"Well, I should probably get some rest. Big day tomorrow, right?" 

"Indeed! I'll get out of your hair." Alastor says as he makes his way to the door. "I wish you all the luck int he word, Y/n. And I'll be there, right by your side for your audition tomorrow morning. I promise." 

"Thanks Al." You say before yawning. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Y/n." 

You smooth out your dress as you briskly walk to Mimzy's lounge, your heart was beating wildly in your chest, and not just from your fast pace. You never felt more nervous, today could be the day that changes your life completely, you have to be perfect. Nothing could go wrong today, it just couldn't. 

As you approach the lounge, you saw Alastor waiting just outside of the door. He gave you a wave as he saw you. You smile weakly and hurried to his side. "Morning." You greet him breathlessly. "Good morning, Y/n. Today's the big day!" Alastor says excitedly. You only nod your head, hands shaking by your side.

"Nervous?" Alastor offers.

"Terrified, more like it." You tell him. "Oh, Alastor. What if I do terribly? I would have wasted yours and Mimzy's time, and just make a complete fool of myself." You say with a shaky sigh. "Come now, you'll do just fine." Alastor said, placing a hand on your trembling shoulder. "How did your boss take the news?" He asked.

"Well, I didn't say I was quitting. Just that, I had somewhere important to be and couldn't stay for my shift." You then grimace. "The look on his face made me want  to curl up and die. He didn't say much, but I could tell he was upset with me." 

"Psh, he can be upset all he wants. He should feel grateful he didn't say anything to upset you. Otherwise, I'd be down there right now." Alastor mutters, his tone dipping low. "Anyhow!" Then his tone was right back to the usual liveliness. "Let's show Mimzy what you've got!"

Alastor leads you inside the lounge, there wasn't anyone in this early, so it was entirely empty. Aside from Mimzy, who was having a smoke at one of the tables nearest to the stage. When she noticed the two of you, she puts out the cigarette and stands from her seat. "Morning, you two. Come on over." 

You and Alastor approach Mimzy, all the while, she kept her gaze firmly on you. "Hm, yeah, just as pretty as I remember her being. Good start." Mimzy says as she checks you over. "Real question is, can you sing?" 

"Y-Yes ma'am." You nod. "Yeah? I'll be the judge of that, sweetheart." Mimzy smirks. "Now, get on up there." She points her thump at the stage. You exhale shakily and glance at Alastor. He brushed his hand on yours and nods. You walk towards the small set of stairs that lead to the stage, and climb them. You approached the microphone and held it gently. It was just two people, Mimzy and Alastor, and yet it felt as if the whole world was watching. 

"I've got a song picked out for you already." Said Mimzy before nodding towards the man at the piano near the rear of the stage. "I hope you know it." The music began to play, and thankfully you did know this song.

You swallowed a lump in your throat and bean to sing along.

I'm sentimental, so I walk in the rain I've got some habits even I can't explain Could start for the corner, turn up in Spain But why try to change me now?

I sit and daydream, I've got daydreams galore Cigarette ashes, there they go on the floor I'll go away weekends, leave my keys in the door But why try to change me now?

There was a point in the song, where you had found yourself becoming less tense. Your eyes closed, and instead of focusing on who was watching you, you look back on your memories. Memories of your parents and yourself, when you were younger. Singing along to songs on the radio with them, the sound of their voices, their faces.

Why can't I be more conventional? People talk, people stare, so I try But that's not for me, 'cause I can't see My kind of crazy world go passing me by

So, let people wonder, let 'em laugh, let 'em frown You know I'll love you till the moon's upside down Don't you remember I was always your clown? Why try to change me now?

You slowly open your eyes as the music died out, and once again it was just Mimzy and Alastor watching. Mimzy was the first to speak. "Alright. I think I have my answer." You felt nervous all over again, heartbeat picking up in your chest as you await her answer. 

"You seem a bit tense, but I guess that's normal for your first time singing in front of folks. But you'll have to handle your nerves when you sing in front of people for real. A nice voice doesn't pair well with a stiff performer." She starts. "But, I think with some practice, you'll be doing just fine. I expect a lot more folks in here now that you're gonna be singing on my stage." 

"D-Does that mean I...?"

"Welcome to showbiz, kid!" Mimzy smirks. You smile brightly at her words, looking to Alastor, you noticed he was just as happy as you were. "See, what did I tell you?" Alastor shrugs. "She's a natural." 

This was really it, you would finally make something of your life. You could finally follow your dream. And it was all thanks to Alastor. You figured you should do something nice for him, after all, he's been so kind to you for all these years.

[stuffeddeer]

hello deery, back like i promised lmao

as much as i love silly goofy buddy dazai, deluded possessive and lowkey scary dazai is my fav 🙏 he's such a silly guy with reader, then turns right around and destroys their entire life. then hes like :O omg thats so horrible, so what im hearing is you have more time to spend with me? seeing as all your friends left for reasons unknown, your family wont even look at you. but dw, i'll never leave :)

BWHAHA im not good at this stuff, but your characterization of dazai is my fav in general, such versatility, we love to see it

have a great day :D

-🩵 anon

HES MY least FAVE TOO ugh 🩵anon you get me

“I’m sorry, lovely. That’s so horrible…” Dazai’s knuckles softly rub against your jaw, his skin soothing you as you try to halt your tears.

“It just— ” you hiccup, “ —just feels like everyone’s leaving me!”

The brunet pulls you closer, practically sitting in his lap as his hands move around your torso. “Shh, shh…” He gently wipes away your remaining tears, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “I’m here, aren’t I?”

You let out an embarrassed chuckle before nodding. “You’re the only one. Not even my boss wanted me around, I can tell. It’s like she was waiting for me to mess up so she could fire me.”

“That’s not true…”

“How would you know?” The words were genuine, like you were looking for him to explain that it was the work of fate or your shitty coworker you always complained about.

Well, it's because Dazai was the one to get you fired. Your boss was too fond of you, something he simply couldn't have. Plus, work hours always took up your time, time that should be spent with him. Honestly, you didn't need a job, anyway: Dazai would be happy to provide for you and make you dependent on him.

Instead of explaining any of this, he pressed another kiss to your head before pulling you in for a tight hug. “You’re a hard worker. And you’re a wonderful person. If none of your friends want to be in your life, well, I do. So I guess you’ll just have to spend time with me.”

It’s his attempt at lightening the mood, you’re sure of it. A chuckle passes your lips before you can stop it, shifting in his hold so you can hug him back just as tightly. “You’re all I have, so now you’re stuck with me.”

“That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”

oh he’s the worst i need him

he’ll cradle you so sweetly, telling you alllll the good things about yourself!!!

n when you get all confident and hey! maybe you are good enough, maybe you should look into making new friends! ones that won’t leave you so easily 🙄

well,

he’s there to remind you just how heartbroken your last ones left you. your very own flesh and blood cut you out so easily! maybe dazai is the only one who can truly love you for who you are.

he’s not saying it to be mean! he just wants you to know what you’re getting yourself into. he’s always been so smart, too…. well, you guess he’s right.

if you’re a bit more stubborn or masochistic, maybe you don’t gaf!!! put you back in the ring you wanna try again!!!!!

ugh. okay. i mean, dazai did so much for you... y’know, when you lost your job and he insisted let you move in with him, dazai was trying to be a good friend, but... whatever, if you don’t need him anymore than you can just get your own place. oh, you still haven’t found a job? well, since you’re so sure of yourself, you can just get a new one. you can be out by tomorrow, right? you know dazai would’ve liked to go out and make friends during the time he’s been working to keep a roof above the both of your heads and keeping you company after everyone left you. maybe he’s starting to see why they did, since you’re so selfish— 

...

you decided not to go out!

that’s probably when he realizes he should begin moving your relationship along a bit quicker. he’ll flirt with you in the exact way he knows you respond to best (whether that's words of affirmation, teasing, physical touch, etc); he'll bring you back pastries and cute trinkets he saw on his way home from work… his courting is a little eerie, bc he also acts like you two are already dating???? "you're staying in my home, of course i assumed we'd be having dinner tonight. i even learned to cook your favorite— " like he 100% just assumes shit but it always works out bc . well, what else were you doing?

this includes sharing a bed btw. he probably started w having you take his and he takes the couch (a true gentleman) and then maybe he gets another bed and makes a guest room for you... but, well, since you both are so close and it's so cold in his apartment, maybe you can just spend one night with him? It Was Not One Night

if you catch on and reciprocate, oh he's over the moon!!!! his love giving him affection? oughhh.. you're staying in his room in his arms and he's just breathing you in, reminding himself you're still there... it'd be actually kinda sweet if he didn't orchestrate this whole thing

if you catch on (or don't lmao) and deny him? .............

desperate times desperate measures or whatever they say

he locks you in his room for mandatory cuddles, will not give you food if you stick to one side of the room and refuse to let him hold you, he starts pulling away and spewing words he knows will hurt you so you feel so alone and unloved only to turn around and love bomb you.... it's horrific tbh

i'm so sorry . just... go along w it for now pls ❤️

also i mentioned that he'd bring up how you don't have a job and he's the one working hard to pay for your expenses but he's just being a brat. he caught you looking at help wanted ads one time and pretty much cried in your lap about how upset he is that you don't feel his care is adequate enough and only stopped when you promised not to get another job

he's gross :( get out of there

[todayisafridaynight]

class was Basically cancelled today so im looking at the next two sabu ttm movies i wanted to watch and i stg sabu really does love putting ttm in bad situations <- this is a good thing

[themoonstarwarrior]

Well, I haven't seen the episode yet, but since it sounds like BloodMoon is refusing to be saved, imma go ahead and share the idea I mentioned to @twinanimatronics about how Sun could've possibly reached them.

Obviously BloodMoon wont sit still and listen so this scenario has Sun use star power to trap BM just like old moon did to him with Moon on standby to come in once the 5 minutes are up.

Basically, Sun asks them WHY they kill and hurt people and BM brings up the main three reasons: they enjoy it, they dont want to be a tool, and they hunger. Since literally none of the protags have actually asked, Sun would be surprised that theres more than the first reason and interrogate to get to the bottom of it. Cuz what Sun realizes is that BloodMoon doesnt have any deeper motives or desires because of their eternal hunger. Their ENTIRE existence has circled around violence to satisfy their hunger. They get used to satisfy their hunger. They enjoy the rip and tear because it stops the hunger.

They have always been a tool to the hunger.

So Sun offers the one thing that no one has: what if they get rid of the hunger?

BM is confused cuz all they've ever known is the hunger, and Sun has to dig the point home by explaining how they can keep killing but it'll come back, and probably stronger. They could kill everyone and everything but then the hunger will come back. And the only thing thatll be left to kill is each other.

And THAT freaks them out, because that is the only thing BloodMoon stands to lose is the brotherhood. (And while BM1 would probably race about lies and trickery, BM2 cant deny the logic)

So with BM actually realizing how their hunger endangers them, and Moon at this point just WAITING to finish them off, Sun lays down the ultimatum. Since no change of heart can happen if all they've ever known is hunger, Sun/Moon/Solar can try and remove it to and see if the twins can be rehabilitated, otherwise Moon ends them then and there.

And I love this idea so much!!! It addresses the REAL block that BM has that hasnt been brought up since that one episode where they kill the anime girl. We get to keep BloodMoon, since the creators went to the trouble of bringing them back and giving them a new model so it'd be a lil annoying if they just ended up killed again. It acknowledges how much BM has been used and brushed aside while admitting that there hasnt been much else to them. And you could have a whole rehabilitation arc, with everyone healing and BM given a real change and actual honesty, since god knows no one is gonna be mincing words. And I imagine their blood-hunger being removed ends up like the Ruin Virus a bit, where getting rid of it cuts down a LOT of the more sadistic urges. So the boys get a mostly-tamed but still-pretty-fucking-insane BloodMoon Twins that basically is just the feral crazy guy that hangs around Animal from Muppets lol and idk stays with Monty cuz hes more easygoing on the violent habits and they need to NOT be anywhere near the daycare.

And maybe I'll watch the episode and be alright with it, but it just sucks cuz this would work SO GOOD and I know the showrunners wouldn't do it. So now I've had to make this fucking long ass post and y'all hafta deal with it.

And maybe someday I'll write a drabble this and the other SAMS scenes I've imagined...

So yeah, sorry about the rambling and shit. I hate how emotionally involved I get with this show that I love. And I'll go ahead and tag @garbagechocolate out of obligation X)

[girls-alias]

Dean's Dream P4

Title: Dean's Dream P4

Part 3

Words: 1333

Relations: Dean Winchester X Reader

TW: Foul language.

Prompt:

Dean is captured by a Djinn and dreams of Y/N.

She turned, smiling at me. From the smirk on her lips I knew she had caught me checking her out. She giggled approaching me. "Keep looking at me like that and we wont make it to Sam's," She explained seductively before leaning up. I smirked, leaning in to connect our lips. A kiss, intended to be short and sweet but developed into roaming hands and dancing tongues. I smirked against her lips, thankful I was here though I knew I didn't want to be anywhere else.

"Excuse me!" An old woman's voice called from behind me. I moved to pull away but my lips wouldn't allow me to leave hers. The woman in my arms, the love of my life only pulling me closer.

*What Dean couldn't see was his woman flipping the old lady the finger over Dean's shoulder. *

"How rude! There are kids in this neighbourhood," The woman continued to complain. I watched as she pulled away from the kiss, eyes rolling. She looked pissed.

"Wind your neck in lady or we'll show them the birds and the bee's right on this porch," Her voice was raised, her eyes serious and dark but a smile never leaving her lips. It wasn't a sincere smile but a smile non the less. I chuckled, admiring her as she stared the lady down. Damn!

The old hag scoffed dramatically, looking around for other neighbours to take her side but no one was looking in our direction. She grumbled as she walked away.

"What a cuck," My woman scoffed before turning to me, as soon as her eyes were on me she had loving and happy eyes. Her smile reflecting the love she has for me. I wanted to chuckle but didn't want to miss a second of looking at her. "Come on, hot stuff. You're driving," She explained holding car keys out to me. I chuckled as I accepted the keys, she moved to keep walking but I pulled her back by her waist. Instantly connecting our lips again. She giggled as she kissed me back but pulled away smiling brightly. My lips curled into a smile as I admired her up close.

"I love you," I confessed but she chuckled, placing a hand on my cheek.

"I love you too," She expressed, connecting our lips softly and pulling away slowly. "We do have to go though," She explained reluctantly. I nodded, finally releasing her hips from my grasp. She smiled interlocking our fingers to hold my hand as she guided me down the porch steps and towards the car.

1967 Chevy Impala. I admired it's beauty, wondering how I could possibly recognise the car more than the amazing woman who loves me. I still don't know her name. Maybe I should look for letters in the mail, that will surely have her name on it. Her fingers began slipping from mine as she made her way to the passenger's side. I took the opportunity to slap her ass as she walked away. She looked back, smirking at me devilishly. The grin on my face growing as I got another excuse to admire her.

We got in the car, AC/DC instantly playing through the car as I started the engine. She gasped leaning forward to turn it up. She likes rock music, how is she getting more and more perfect? I put the car in reverse ready to drive away before realising I have no idea where I'm going.

"I'll give you directions don't worry," She explained as if it was no big deal. I looked at her, taking a second to just watch her as her smile grew wider the more I was looking at her. She giggled after a little while. "What?" She asked.

"I love you," I confessed because she knows me so well. I have no idea what's going on and she's guiding me through it so easily. She knows me better than I know myself.

"I love you too," She chuckled as she shook her head softly.

She guided me all the way to Sam's house. We pulled up outside to see a small house on a quiet street, 7 houses at most. I smiled knowing he must be happy here. I turned off the car, she gave me a final smile and kiss before climbing out. I can't stop smiling, she's too perfect! I climbed out and watched as she opened the back door and started grabbing a large bag full of wrapped presents and a card on top. I grinned knowing she must have put a lot of effort into this. I hurried to her side as she started leading the way to his house, I placed my hand over hers, accepting the bag from her grasp. She smiled brightly but chuckled.

"It's a little heavy," She explained but I shrugged, it can't be that heavy. She chuckled before dropping the bag into my hand. My eyes almost popped out of my head. It wasn't too heavy that I couldn't carry it but it was heavy enough to make me almost drop it. She laughed, a beautiful, harmonic laugh. Stopping in her tracks to bend, she was laughing so hard. I chuckled, simply wishing to always remember this moment no matter what happens.

"Oh, you think that's funny?" I asked playfully, she struggled for breath as she stood up straight about to come back with a snarky remark but couldn't hold her laugh in any longer and burst out again. I laughed alongside her.

"Having fun without me," Sam's voice called from his front door. I looked up as he started walking out to greet us. She stopped laughing and her smile was beaming. "Y/N," He exclaimed hurrying down his porch steps. That's her name! Y/N. Y/N. Y/N. I need to remember it! Y/N. Y/N. Y/N.

"Sammy!" She exclaimed rushing to hug him. They met in the middle hugging tightly as he lifted her from the ground. He put her down and turned to me not noticing that she playfully rolled her eyes at him. I grinned widely, they're best friends. I love it! Sam hurried to me a little, I wasn't completely sure how we would greet each other but his arms opened and I accepted his tight hug. I grinned widely, patting his back with my free hand. He stepped back smiling at me widely.

"Happy birthday, Sammy," I explained holding my arm up a little to offer him the bag. He looked surprised before accepting it and smiled at me with tear filled eyes.

"Thank you, you didn't have to do all this," He explained, grabbing the card from the top.

"Y/N did it all," I cheered, happy to be saying her name. It rolled of my tongue with ease. She gasped audibly. I looked to see her approaching. She stood by my side, lifting my left arm to drape over her shoulders, I smiled as I pulled her in closer.

"I'll have you know, it's baby to you," She explained correcting me. I chuckled seeing the irony. I've felt terrible all morning for not knowing her name and now she only wants me to call her baby. I didn't even need to know it really. "But Dean's being modest, he has been working on your gifts for months, isn't that right babe?" She asked, turning to wink at me to play along. She wants me to take the credit. She's fucking perfect!

"Well, I wouldn't say that," I played it off but Sam chuckled.

"I really appreciate it, man. Thank you," Sam explained, coming back to hug me again.

"Don't say that, you haven't opened them yet," Y/N joked, making us laugh as we pulled away from the hug. She clapped her hands together. "Alright, where's my nephew? Russ!" She called out facing the house. My eyes widened as I watched his front door. Sammy has a son?!

A dog burst through the screen door, it banged against the wood panelling of his house. I almost sighed with relief. Thank God I didn't forget a child. Y/N's face lit up as the dog rushed to her and she quickly stroked him talking to him with a baby voice. She keeps getting cuter and cuter.

"Come on, I'll get us a beer," Sam explained, gesturing with his head to the house. I watched Y/N as she smiled brightly and joined me at my side for the small walk. I draped my arm over her shoulders, watching as she smiled even brighter.

"God, I love you," I whispered as I kissed the top of her head as we walked.

"I love you too," She explained slowing down and turning to me to quickly connected our lips. She really is perfect.

Masterlist Part 5

[copperpipes]

Okay so with the biblically accurate turtles, would them having more turtle DNA make them more dangerous? As in, more unstable? That reptillian brain just kicks in sometimes and raph will open his mouth and wiggle his tongue at random times to try and "lure" prey in, or donnie hisses and snaps and his brothers if they annoy him too much, and especially things like mating season for turtles some get especially aggressive and territorial (poor splinter prolly has so many scars from when they were babies)

Buckle up, this is gonna be long.

Let's start off with the fact I'm not changing anything, so I won't call this an au (that's just how i like to draw the turtles) i'm merely deepening the existing lore and making sense of it, at least for myself.

To explain how their brains came to be and answer the first part of your question I'll start at the beginning. I'll start with Draxum, what his goal was and how he planned to reach it, what he did, some canon related theories and from there and in the process I'll answer the rest of your first ask. 

I don't have many headcanons actually, most of what i did was explaining things with my existing knowledge, this ties to my theories and my love of realistic sci-fi and worldbuilding.

Read this however you want, I'll call this an essay.

Draxum has been planning on the turtles long before he found Splinter. We know he schemed against humanity for years or possibly decades, maybe even a century (He is stated to be a couple hundred years old). With counting on the genocide of the human race he may have gone through countless drafts that for some reason didn't suit him (I could have suggested more efficient ways but then the turtles wont be born), In the end it led him to come up with the idea of warriors for mass destruction. Draxum could have created beast mutants, but I understand the ways in which intelligent fighters could be better, for example they could be taught magic when mindless animals couldn't.

We know that he has been looking for a powerful warrior to act as a surrogate DNA donor to perform the mutation, the moment he found one he would have done it, at least i believe these were his intentions, which must have meant the base subjects, or at least the plans for them, were already done. 

(Mutation diagram)

[base subject/base/base entity/base creature]= the original specimen the mutation is performed on.

[surrogate DNA]= the additional genetic material which when infused into the mutagen can react with other DNA, the form doesn't matter, and replace up to 70% of the base’s dominant genes.

This may result in a cancerous outbreak and or death.

As in, he removed everything that he deemed unsuitable in his base subjects. He probably had years to do that, to nitpick gens, essentially directing and speeding up evolution, creating a special kind of turtle with both physical, hormonal, and behavioral traits he wanted even before he found a creature to mutate them with. Getting rid of some traits and strengthening/ adding others, heck, he may have even involved prehistoric gens that have gone recessive or added gens that were not in the base creatures at all.

I'll elaborate; part of the instincts were bread out due to being no longer necessary or a hassle in general. The brumation season was removed, but not the turtles ability to brumate, let me explain:

Yokai (I assume Draxus thought to find a yokai DNA donor) are homeothermal, meaning warm blooded. while turtles, our dear ol’ reptiles, are ectothermal, meaning cold blooded (I'll also assume you know what is the difference between them, if you don't, that's what Google is for). Draxum needed to combine these two, making a type of bi-blooded creatures that can slowly adjust to their environment’s temperature. But, if the difference between the internal and external temperatures is too big, they will brumate to minimize the strain on the body and adjust, obviously this takes longer.

About the breeding season you mentioned, the issue in it was it lasted just a month or so and made the subjects aggressive more towards each other (earlier in the research two died of injuries caused overnight) which he really didn't want, so he cut it out their yearly cycle.

 he didn't know he would find his suitable warrior to be a human, but let's say he found splinter as soon as he was shown in the battle nexus (would make sense for him to check there regularly), he would have another 16 years to adjust his base subjects for binding with human DNA until he re-kidnapped Splinter. I also think there were things that were pre-set in the mutagen infusion (you can ask and remind me later, there is much there and here is already enough).

It took Draxum about 13 years to reach the correct formula of mutagen after his lab (and I'm assuming all his documented research) were destroyed by Splinter when he ran with the turtles. And I think the second version is much much different from the first, let's start with the obvious, the second mutagen is already infused with different kinds of surrogate DNA and is inserted by the oozasquitos directly into the bloodstream. It does not affect the general silhouette of the base subject and most importantly, it doesnt change the nervous system.

The first version doesn't just do that, it is its foremost purpose, it is meant to bind the human anatomy with the turtle base in a way that it would make a human shaped turtle, not a turtle shaped human. It essentially packs the human neuronal-cells to body mass ratio compressed into a reptile skull. Only, the reptile brain doesn't go anywhere, it just expands to the point it is capable of comprehending the universe. there are instincts left, they are just drowned out by everything else. there are instances where you are more likely to see them, like in moments of extreme emotional instants, overloads, shutdowns, meltdowns and the such, but also, in their fighting/ defense styles.

there was a major reason Draxum chose to mutate baby turtles, baby turtles he molded into something that can stand the mutation by selectively breeding them for it. baby turtle brains that would forget how painful the mutation was and would likely not suffer from PMSD (post-mutation-stress-disorder) and the likely following after that depression, and they won't need to walk and move all over again because they didn't know that yet.

there is seriously still so much i gotta tell, like, i cut out of this answer so much, about how the mutagen works, what else did draxum do to the turtles, and so so so so so much details i left out because this was getting long and i need sleep

to all the people who have sent asks, i didnt forget about you! i will get to everything, it just takes me time because i want to make an effort

thanks for the ask :D