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tomatograter · 4 years

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New to the fandom, Could you explain June? 💯 Love and support her. But homestuck 2 doesn't have her and I'm just confused?

June Egbert precedes the concept of homestuck^2! I’ve seen a lot of people be confused about this because they weren’t active on the fandom at the time the epilogues dropped, when reading her as a trans woman got a lot of discussion going and eventually lead to multiple confirmations.

So here’s an attempt at contextualization:

Throughout Homestuck, a few key ideas about Egbert’s identity and motivation to push forward with her hero’s journey are dropped like breadcrumbs. She’s meant to play the default straight-man protagonist. Her defining traits are ridiculously… generic, when compared to how all the other kids present themselves and stick to exaggerated bits. She’s a perfectly normal, regular suburban kid with normal, suburban issues.

She may not leave her room a whole lot. She may not have a lot of real life friends in the neighborhood. She holds a comical irritation for the concept of birthdays, even though her father is extremely supportive, and is delighted to see his son grow up nice and healthy. There’s no reason for her to be so irrationally upset at cakes and gifts, and that’s what makes the setup funny! June doesn’t even know why she’s annoyed with half of the things that annoy her, what the heck.

But under all that playing around there is a sense that her life is so normal, so blasé, so unexciting and limiting and hollow and fake that she’d give anything to not be herself, even if only for ten minutes. This goes way, way back. It’s why June needs SBURB to happen.

June lives as though her life hasn’t started yet. She’s stuck in the Tutorial stage. I would argue while most kids (and trolls) play SBURB to escape a shitty environment or the end of the world as they know it, June plays for a simpler reason: She needs to escape herself, and she needs to do it before it is too late.

Being thirteen means crossing the homeric abyss between being a child with no care for the world sporting a generic hand-me-down identity and becoming a Teen (capital T) who needs to figure out how to cope with atrocious bodily changes while building the adult they’re meant to be AND deciding what the fuck they want out of life, and how they’re going to work to get it, forever and ever.

When you’re trans, and you don’t yet know you’re trans (or that this is a thing you’re even ALLOWED to be) the above feels a lot like serving a life sentence for an intangible crime.

You know what you’re supposed to do. You’ve seen it on tv, you’ve heard it from your dad, you know what are the normal trials and tribulations. You know you'll grow a few pimples and stubble and you'll need to learn how to shave, obviously, because it's basically a tradition in your family, and no one is really happy to be a teen. You know at some point you'll find a nice girl and you'll grow a hat out of your skull and then you will have to pay taxes and maybe you will have a baby daughter? You'd like it to be a daughter for no particular reason. And when you get a daughter you're going to name her Casey and she's going to be adorable and this is something you've dedicated a lot of thought to. Maybe its because you thought Nic Cage looked really cool with those long flowing locks in con air, the movie who featured a trans woman as a minor character for a few minutes (and she gets quite a bit of compliments, regardless of how the movie has aged), and he had a really exciting life, but goddamn did he love his daughter. There is no purer love than the bond between a father and his daughter.

This absolutely has nothing to do with your father and you, or how you hold no excitement for becoming an adult man, or how your father's excitement for you becoming an adult man in your stead feels a little stifling.

But i digress.

June spends her time on SBURB mostly hassling karkat, and readily following the instructions of zany, dangerous, COOL girls that seem to know what they're doing. June lets Terezi lead her to certain death without blinking. June lets Vriska dress her up as soon as opportunity presents itself. June thinks its really funny to trick this troll Who Types Really Oddly into believing she's Rose, and also into believing that she's a very silly girl. You may even say Homestuck employs a few of jokes pertaining to how her name looks like EGG !

June has a ball playing this game until it starts to get shitty. She's never able to mend her relationship with her dad, as he's one of the first causalities. She has to spend a lot of time waiting around with jade on a ship until things get cool and exciting again, but she never stops growing during those three years. Its fine, though, because there's always more things to be done and more people to fight.

Until there aren't, and they make a new earth, and while everyone cheers and claps for the birth of a new planet June realizes all her excuses are over. Her friends begin to grow up. Rose gets married. Jade is living her best life. Dave has a not-boyfriend glued to his hip. Jane has a job. Jake is on TV for some reason. June doesn't want to leave home. June's birthday is around the corner again. Here come all the congratulations for becoming a strong lad for yet another year! Vriska is gone. Terezi is gone. SBURB is over. Wacky hijinks have been swapped for real-ass, boring-ass Regular life. We watch her unsuccessfully chase after the glory of days gone by when Rose presents her the possibility of going back into the game, when things were cool and mattered, or her flimsy decision to settle down with a nice girl she hasn’t really made an effort to know and become a father and be absolutely miserable for four decades as she asserts nothing is real, not anymore, and this is just how it is.

Depersonalization, depression and general apathy towards the world are all pronounced aspects of dysphoria that seem like unrelated incidents for someone who hasn't came out yet. June's trainwreck of a life post-game, specially her feeling of hollowness and chasing after anything that could fill it struck a chord with trans readers who left the epilogues to read HS again and discovered this has always sort of been here. June being a trans woman who doesn't have the proper vocabulary to express she is a trans woman makes a lot of earlier bits from the comic click into place, now in a broader context. We settled in the name "June" because it's what she imagines Vriska is calling her at some point, amid laughs, but even that was discussed for a lengthy period last year. What would she want to be called, what are possible tags for this, etc. But it was mostly for fun and games, because the prospect of the protagonist of a 10 year old beloved cult series being ACTUALLY confirmed as a trans woman just wasn't something that was done.

Until word got around to Andrew Hussie and he was reportedly so pleased with this interpretation of events he’d be making references to it, and some time later, a box of toblerones was left in a cave as a gift for fans to find. The first person to find a toblerone thought it would be funny to dedicate it to June, because now she was an ongoing reference that was fun to make. Instead of it ending there, Hussie logs on twitter for the first time in a long while to say 'Oh yeah, i'll make it happen' and that's when the whole thing exploded. I have a post detailing this made a year ago (with pictures!) so i won't keep you here.

In the year since, June has been vaguely alluded to in Pesterquest (in jade's end card, she's having her nails painted by rose.) Has been widely adopted by the community, those making their own fanventures and continuations, and the team behind Homestuck^2. In every way that matters, she's already thriving within the community that brought her to light a year ago. But her coming out in canon is something that will take time and a proper narrative arc to happen, one that is still being set up. We know it'll come eventually, the only question is “how”.

Not that the wind waits for anyone.

#meta #june egbert #homestuck #homestuck 2

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popculturebuffet · 2 years

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The Owl House Weekly Reviews: King’s Tide: Watcha Playin?

Happy pride alll you happy gay, bi, pan, trans, enby, and anyone on the beautiful techincolor people! I intended to start with more David Bowie’s crotch but with the week getting away from me and with a lot to do this weekend that’ll have to wait. Still we’re back to the gayest place on earth one last time this season and for some of the last of my weekly coverage. I might do it for season 3, we’ll see, but while doing episodes of a show every week has been fun with ya’ll, it’s also incredibly stressful at times as I wasn’t able to finalize my schedule till the week before the next month. I’ll still likely cover one off episodes or do quick thoughts on new shows down the pipe like Hamster and Gretel and Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur or ones in progress I watch like Big City Greens or The Ghost and Molly McGee, but as for doing reviews of shows as they come out

I”ll still be here reveiwing all kinds of fun animation and comics stuff though, and it’s pride which means it’s time for superman, simpsons and one of the most baffling lines in the history of media

And time to say goodbye for now for the last time to one of the best shows in recent memory. I stand by that 100% and have said it plenty: Owl House is a masterpiece, with it’s pacing, characterization and plot movement both feeling effortless and moving at rapid pace. It’s especially apparent this half as it’s become clearer that they DID in fact know season 3 was getting cut sometime this season, likely during the second half... and somehow managed to compress plot lines that were likely meant to play out over far more episodes into only a few, Hunter’s relationship with willow (which still hasn’t upgraded but we got plenty of crumbs to keep us huntlows fed), Alador’s face turn, the resitance, steve’s face turn, king dealing with what he is. .it’s clear these were PROBABLY supposed to take longer, but still feel fully realized as is. Despite knowing they coudln’t do everything they still did the most with what they had and it makes the anticipation for the finale movies all the bigger. The season didn’t just stick the landing it fucking piroutted into it. So let’s discuss that under the cut with full spoilres, though it has been long enough thanks to those busy few days I could put my new faviorite little shit up there without fearing it was too much.

So yeah while this is the only review without amphibia this season, supposed to be one of two but you know

I still don’t be doing the strict plot summary I often do. So let’s just go right up front and knock... the collector has finally fully been unleashed and we finally see who he is and it is both great and a lot. Prevoiusly while the collector spoke and acted like a child, it was hard to tell just HOW innocent he was. Was he just deeply immature and psychotic like Bill Cipher but gleefully aware how terrible his actions, like helping with genoicde are, or simply something more like Anthony Fremont, where due to being a child with the reality warping powers of a god, he dosen’t realize just how horrifying he is or his actoins are and there hasn’t been anyone powerful enough to properly teach him. To him humans, demons, witches and blob monster men that only one person in the entire world finds attractive, hello Bogs, are just people to play games with or toys to break. He dosen’t understand why say, splatting belos like a pile of gack on a wall is fucking horrifying or that possibly doing so to the hexasquad is wrong. It dosen’t entirely EXCUSE him from being terrible, but it explains it.

He’s also pitable. Sure he’s terrifying, again he took the big bad of the story who no one else has been able to take on in a straight fight and who even as near mindless monster STILL nearly killed the hexasquad and only lost because King summoned a god he happend to piss off.. but he also seemed to GENINELY value Belos as a friend and given what we’ve seen of phillip, he’s a skilled manipulator. He prayed on a child with flexible morals and then tossed him down a ravine. It’s one of the MANY, MANY reasons seeing him become wall gunk was so fucking satisfying. He’s not innocent and if he is to be redeemed he needs to, much like say the diamonds, work to undo the massive damage he’s done and is probably about to do. But I still have hope for him: he’s still a child. A child who needs to be disiplinced and taught right from wrong. Granted he could easily cross the moral event horizion wayyyy too far in the specials, but he could also come back> It’s a coin flip.

But the design, voice work and character theme are all top notcha nd the scene of him making belos into wall mold is fucking incredible from the little smile on him to just how fucking terrified belos is.. I mean everyone else too but again after having to put up with this prick for so long it’s just so NICE to see him terrified seconds before getting turned into abstract art. He sadly didn’t die but I doubt reforming as an alolan grimer in gravesfield will be much better for him. The point is in just a few minutes of proper screentime the collector goes from a creepy engima to an even creepier but far more complex god being whose giving our heroes their greatest challenge yet. I have NO idea how they’ll beat him and odds are it’ll have to be with empathy and thought instead of a straight up fight because if so the cast is gonna shrink a LOTTTT. I mean we’re in the endgame so we’re at the point where if Dana’s gonna kill anyone, it’s now, but it’s clear they can’t beat him.

So moving on to Phillip, we get more of a build to the fact his “grand victory” which is racist jerkhole terms for “mass genocide on a global scale”.. is really going to win him nothing. He’s dressed in period clothes planning to go back and not getting time has passed him by: puritan is a term for uptight asshole stuck in the past, with phillip convently the dictonary picture, witches are part of popular media, including this one, and are at worst cackling halloween decorations or tearing apart reality to find replacement kids, and society in general would see him as a crazy old man.. which he is but not for the reasons they think .He’s so deluded himself he never even considered things change till luz brings it up. With the collector it was clear he just didn’t want to hear it but with Luz he feels a kinship in species wanting to “save her”. But likely like it was for his brother since as it turns out puritans be fucking nuts, thanks Jess for that one, this world.. was her salvation. She fit in here. His nightmare is her daydream. It found her friends, love, a second mom, a brother, and made her better. It could’ve made Phillip better too but he clung so hard to his prejudices he made himself a monster as much outside as in. Luz learned who she was wasn’t perfect and changed.. phillip clung to the flawed person he was and the horrible idologies beaten into him and changed too.. becoming worse, giving into his worst tendencies.

It’s also what makes their fight satsifying: Luz does show she’s come a long way pulling off a sick fire combo and other great moves.. but ultimately she’s a fast learner, since the titan actually likes her, against a trained mastre whose had hundreds of years to pull of combos she can’t fathom and unlike her has a stick to fast track that shit. As such she looses... then wins again. See belos in a fight.. is near unbeastable with power both from his mutation and from sheer skill and mastery. It’s why the day of unity was so daunting, even if our heroes cleared the heads, the armies, the abomintons.. they still had to deal with Philip himself. And even as a group their odds weren’t great. But as a person while his scheming is near imptetnrible his ego isn’t. He thinks so little of anyone besides himself, that he’s very easy to manipulate. Luz played him the first time.. and does so again this time using a coven glove he left around to brand him, not only giving him the same death sentence he gladly gave everyone else, but with his own weapon.

Sadly though.. this dosen’t work. The spell is already in motion thanks to Terra, and I found the fact she simply figured out Rahne wasn’t brainwashed anymore was clever. I thought spying through his eyes or having a literal spy, but nope the bats are guilt free... and in the case of steve and amber just plain free as their not in this episodes, which I feel will be importnat. Or they just couldn’t fit all of them in a goop ring

Either way their absence is noticable. As is bump and the younger witches which is either a chekovs gun or Dana finally forgot something admist having to speedrun everything which if that’s the case it’s still something we can live without for now and it’s impressive only NOW she’s forgotten anything.. and I still have faith she didn’t and this is all deliebrate as it always has been. We’ll see in the fall I suppose.

Point is the rebellions failure is sad: it was ineveitble, especailly with Luz going directly to asshole do not pass go do not collect 20 dollars, and while it’s nice there was no traitor and VERY nice to FINALLY see the other coven heads scrap, even if we didn’t get personalities because fuck you disney, it was still sad to see everything fall apart to see our heroes loose.. and our villians realize instead of utopia.. they just get to die. There was no grand design.. just death and they caused their own. *IT’s a fitting defeat for terra.. her own manipualtions and selfishness nearly killed her. I doubt it’s the last we’ll see. And I hope so. I still want to know what creepy healing guy and potion scarf man’s deals are. What ARE THEY.

But yes, Belos NEARLY wins. As while Luz’s gambit is clever it forgot one thing: Belos dosen’t CARE if he lives or dies. Sure he wanted to go home, but as he said to himself while summoning the collector he had to live long enough “to see this througH” so if long enough is “while everyone else dies” that’s fine. Even if he weren’t horribly mutated by the sigil, his inablity to control his wild magic turning him into a savage green monster hulk style... there wasn’t an off switch.L That was never a priority. Like Thanos, I get yet ANOTHER thanos comparison.. there was never any intent to let anyone walk this back. If he dies, he dies, but the mission comes first. He may not live to get the fancy witch hunter general hat, but he’ll have “saved” us from what he sees as a monsters. Luz underestimated just how much Belos belivied his own lies and it nearly cost her everything. While it was truly awesome seeing the hexasquad fight him even borderline feral.. belos is still ultimately too strong and nearly kills them all.

So we get King’s deal with our feral child god, and it’s smart working on his part: he makes up a bs game, gets an agreement to help, and does so in a way that guarantees the collector NEEDS to do what King needs most, save everyone, even if King is rightfully afraid of him and it turns out it wasn’t belos but the collector his dad hid him from. And again given all of the above, King makes the hard choice.. replacing one problem with another but at least preventing genocide. Also I couldn’t help but be reminded of mr popo just casually restoring the sun when the collector just.. moved the moon. Great stuff

That also leads to our tearful climax... while everyone’s saved, though eda was earlier thanks to rahne.. their now at the mercy of a god and Willow cleverly suggests booking it to earth... and Luz intends to stay with king to make sure everyone’s safe from the grumpy child. But in the end King’s real growth comes in the sacrifice he makes: he knows the collector wants him and will probably be satsitifed with that much... and that at worst Luz won’t come back will be safe and at best it gives them a chance to plan and come save his mother later. His letting her go was utterly heartbreaking, but was the perfect capper of king’s development from wacky comic relief sidekick.. to a true hero willing to trap himself with child he does not want to play with if it means his sister and friends are safe.

The ending is also just rife with possiblity: belos is still alive, camilla now not only gets to meet living proof the isles were good for her daughter but has to make the hard choice to let her go back for the greater good, hutner finally gets a mom and vee get smore friends.. and we ge tmore of that adorable mud fish thing. Seriously her just casually helping with dinner has only happened twice but it’s always adorable. We also got confromation of something vastly important that will likely have no impact whatsoever on the plot but every impact on fanfiction

I’m so fucking happy I could burst. This opens so many doors. Point is there’s a lot to question. I also noticed Gus was the one to break down... and it made it the most impactful. He finally gets his dream.. and it’s with his dad and everyone else he knows bar the hexasquad at The Collector’s horrifying whims. Everyone else has even more reason to break down: Luz’s entire boiling isles family is trapped there with king directly trapped with the insane 8 year old behind it all, Amity saw her parents divorce and dosen’t know if her dad was going to make it last time she saw him, Willow’s dads are trapped and Hunter.. well in the span of a week he’s had everything he knows been proven to be a lie, been nearly killed by the man who raised him multiple times, found out he was a clone of someone belos murdered, hid in a school, had to survivie hhis best friends mind labyrinth, nearly got used for a prisoner exchange, got swapped by his friend to save his ass without his consent and had his uncle gaslight him and growl CALEB at him, confrming the preson he killed once owned Flapjack.

Point is Camilla needs to hug all of them and I need a paper bag after al lof that. This is going to be one hell of a wait and I can’t wait to see how it wraps up. I’ll be sad to see the show leave.. but this is how you pull off a cliffhanger :leave them begging for what’s next after throughly earning it.

Overall season 2.. is a masterpiece. Season 1 was good.. but season 2, now free from executive mandates since Disney clearly was planning to axe the show, and frankly it’s a miracle we’re getting the season 3 we are, got to do whatever it wanted, giving us a dark, tense, if still funny as hell and heartfelt ride. We’ve had pirate adventures, karens who sell arms and try to profit off genocide, gooey murder butlers, a valid aseop against anti-vaxxers at exactly the right time, Gus metting a lady then finding out she’s terrible, The Season of Hunter, one of the best and most visable non-binary characters in animation, a hooty episode that ended up being one of the best and most important of the series, this

Camilla getting fully fleshed out and adopting an adorable mud lizard thing, Luz’s denail reaching criticla mass, time travel, HUNTLOW, a tournament arc, a flashback..

People wearing kingskin caps, MORE HUNTLOW, Soul Searching Steve Road Trips, a rescue arc with one of the greatest lesbian kisses in animation history, and finally

It’s been a great pleasure covering this one. Thank you all for reading and thank you so much for enjoying my weird shit. Before you go please consider voting in my latest poll or joining my patreon

Poll is Here

Patreon is Here

See you next time.

#the owl house #the owl house spoilers #the collector #luz noceda #king clawthorne #disney channel #disney plus #phillip whitbane

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caswellprmanager · 3 years

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drawbridge

read it on ao3

Ship: Ricky Bowen/EJ Caswell

Summary: Snippets of EJ Caswell's life leading up to the mystery that is Ricky Bowen.

Notes: Hello. I decided to bite the bullet and post something here! This technically is in my Trans!EJ and Genderqueer!Ricky AU but I haven't properly written anything for it yet so consider this one to be the first official fic within that universe. Feel free to send some asks or other headcanons in my inbox about the AU! I'd love to hear what people think (but don't be unnecessarily mean. I will delete that very quickly.)

Disclaimer: I'm not an expert in all things transgender or genderqueer. I am writing from my own experience within the spectrum however so it's truthful to what I have been through, but will not represent everyone else's experiences. I also have friends within the spectrum who have given me great advice on how to go about these things but once again, it won't be accurate to everyone's experiences.

Warnings: Mentions of gender dysphoria, transphobia, and neglectful parents

People always told EJ that he had the picture perfect family.

His mom and dad were successful corporate lawyers, they lived in the wealthiest suburb in all of Salt Lake City, and he was the kind of child other parents would compare their own children to saying, "why can't you be more like EJ?"

But EJ knows that's farthest from the truth.

He doesn't have the picture perfect life or the paragon of White American families that people think they do. His parents are affectionate and supportive only when there are people around to comment on it. Most of the time, they're not even at home, leaving all of the child raising to their maids and other house servants. EJ spends more time at Ashlyn's house than he does at home because at least his aunt and uncle actually treat him like a son.

Because there are days his parents would forget they have a son. Sometimes they'd slip and call him their daughter, which makes EJ want to disappear from this world altogether. He supposes he should be grateful that they even bothered to pay for all the things he asked for — binders, testosterone shots, and regular visits to the doctor to check up on him throughout his transition. And he is grateful. He knows so many kids like him that can't even afford a decent sized binder without going bankrupt. He used to be that kid until he gathered up all his courage to come out to his parents.

But what they told him?

"Well, if you're gonna be our son, you will have to work twice as hard to make us proud now."

Yeah. It's a lot to process when you're 12 years old and scared shitless that you'd be disowned for "disrupting the natural order." But he figures things could be worse. So he sucks it up and vows to become the kind of son that his parents could truly brag about.

When EJ was a kid, he loved mysteries. His parents were the greatest mystery of them all. He's spent so much of his time trying to figure out what makes them happy, or angry, or sad. He's put the clues together and has a cork board of pictures and red string at the forefront of his mind whenever he so much as tries to interact with them. Soon, he sort of figured out what makes his parents smile at him — when EJ is excellent.

So, he became excellent at all kinds of sports, took up piano lessons, studied until his eyeballs burned with the lowlight of his desk lamp — all so that he could maybe get a pat on the back from his dad and a small smile from his mom. Their versions of "good job" or "keep it up." He drank that all in, craved it even, and worked his whole life until now to get even an iota of his parents' affection.

So, when he meets Ricky Bowen, the lanky and extremely clumsy skater who seems to live in the detention room, he was met with a brand new mystery to solve.

"Who's that?" EJ whispers into Nini's ear, who just seems to be irritated by the new person's presence.

"That's Ricky," she says with the barest hint of affection but with a whole lot of irritation. "My ex."

"Huh," He says, intrigued by the way Ricky's movements stutter like a half-finished stop motion film and how their wide doe eyes scan the room like — unironically — a deer in headlights. They looked nervous, confused, and all around terrified and EJ wants to reach out to them and tell them that this was a safe space. That they could be whoever they wanted to be in the theater.

He glances at Nini when Ricky starts singing a song that she seems to recognize. The immediate tensing of her shoulders and the way she subconsciously reaches out for EJ's hand for support tells him that this song... means something. Or meant something. EJ's not quite sure but he squeezes Nini's hand in silent reassurance, bringing himself to half-glare at the guitar playing skater just a few feet before him.

He met Nini during theater camp. A firecracker of talent with a voice that could melt the heart of even the coldest man on earth. She was beautiful in the spotlight and even more ethereal beneath the stars. She was kind, gentle, and a mystery that EJ solved quickly enough. She wore her heart on her sleeve despite it being broken because she believes that broken hearts can be mended with time and patience.

Nini was patient with him. She was patient with him when he took her up the little hill next to the campsite just to watch the stars on an old picnic blanket he stole from the camp counselors. She was patient with him when he couldn't keep up with the dance steps. Her hand was warm in his own and the flush of her palm by his neck was a grounding force that kept his head from going in the clouds.

She was especially patient with him when he took her to an empty tent and told her about his life. Nini was kind. Nini was patient. Nini was safe. And if she were to walk away and tell him that she wanted nothing to do with him after what he told her, he would have understood and learned to not associate kind brown eyes and ukulele calloused fingers to what could be barely described as home.

But she held his hand in her tinier ones, a smile on her face that radiated warmth that seeped into the depths of his soul, and told him that she was proud of him.

It was the first time that someone was proud of him... for just being him.

He cried into her arms that night, knowing he's got a lifelong friend within the kind brown eyes and ukulele calloused fingers of one Nini Salazar-Roberts.

"She thinks I'm a Chad?" He asks, less incredulously and more with a burning curiosity.

Nini rubs his arm comfortingly but he keeps staring at the cast list like it was going to burst into flames any second. "You're still a Troy understudy! You could still go on as him in one of the shows."

"Shows only run for three nights, Nini." He says with barely concealed frustration. Great. If he can't even get the role he was technically destined to play, how the hell is he going to explain himself to his parents?

You're not the lead? Oh, then we won't watch. If you're not onstage the whole time, why be there?

EJ grits his teeth and slowly brings his gaze to the person who has just taken away one more way for him to prove himself to his parents. Ricky Fucking Bowen, who stands there once again with their enormous brown eyes, gaping like a fish. EJ wants to deck them in the face. But Nini's hold on his arm grounds him back to reality and he lets out a long breath through his nose.

This is gonna be a long next few months.

"Look, I'm just trying to make the best out of a bad situation."

"Don't try," He ends up saying, still wiping at the blood caused by the basketball Ricky hit him with only moments ago. "It's painful to watch you do something you clearly don't want to do."

"What makes you think I don't want to do this?" Ricky asks with furrowed brows and EJ throws the wadded up tissue paper stained with his blood into the trash.

"You hated musicals before you auditioned. You landed the part of Troy without even fucking trying. And now you think you can get through rehearsals without fucking trying? It's tiring to work with someone who couldn't give two shits about this musical in the first place!" He says, every sentence rising in volume as he steps closer and closer to Ricky. "You also need to stay the fuck away from Nini."

Ricky scoffs then. "Why? Cause you're her boyfriend?"

"What? And you are?" He retaliates, which effectively makes Ricky click their mouth shut. EJ smirks. "Yeah. That's what I thought."

"Nini can choose whoever she wants to talk to." Ricky ends up saying with tense shoulders and a glare that could murder if EJ weren't already a person who doesn't fear death. "You can't tell me what to do."

"Well someone has to!" EJ throws his hands up in frustration, grabbing his jacket and zipping it up angrily. "Because you don't listen to Nini though, do you? Have you ever listened to her? Do you listen to anybody?"

"EJ I—"

"You better listen to me right now Ricky Bowen," he laces every syllable of Ricky's name with venom. "Stop trying to make things right. Stop trying to become a person you're not. If you actually cared about Nini or – god forbid – the musical, you'd stop trying and just get your shit together."

EJ doesn't even bother to look back at Ricky as he exits the bathroom, unaware of the look in Ricky's eyes when he walked away.

It isn't until Ricky approaches him one day after rehearsals that EJ was finally starting to unravel the mystery that was Ricky Bowen.

"Hey... EJ?" Ricky asks, looking at anywhere but at him and EJ would have been annoyed if it weren't for the way Ricky was holding themselves in front of him. They were tense, eyes glassy and unfocused whenever EJ caught a glance, and their fingers were gripping their bag straps so tightly that he was afraid Ricky was going to rip it apart if they weren't careful.

"Hey Ricky," He says with a softer voice than he's ever used with Ricky. "Is there something you need?"

Ricky's eyes dart around the still full rehearsal room, at the dangerously close proximity Miss Jenn was, at the stage managers that were just behind EJ who were reviewing the blocking notes, and finally at Nini who was engaged in a conversation with Carlos and Seb. Ricky's eyes lingered on Nini for a bit before they reluctantly settled on EJ's pristine white sneakers. "I would have normally asked Nini for this but – and you can say no by the way I'd completely understand – it's just..."

Ricky looks around again before leaning closer to EJ and shakily whispering, "Do you have any tampons?"

And just like that, the walls that were built around a certain Ricky Bowen were starting to crack. And EJ was allowed to see the smallest snippet of the kind of vulnerability that Ricky was capable of.

And it was the kind of vulnerability that he could relate to completely.

"My emergency stash is in my locker," He says, hastily packing up the rest of his things while Ricky continues to stand there dumbfounded. When EJ turns back to him with his own bag over his shoulder, he could see that there are a few unshed tears shining in Ricky's eyes. EJ softens for a second, knowing how difficult it must have been for Ricky to come to him for something so private.

"Come on. I'll even guard the bathroom for you." Ricky eventually follows him after a few seconds of just staring at his back and they fall in step around the corner. Ricky stays silent, fingers all fidgety and eyes still darting around like they'll be caught any second. EJ, instinctually, wraps a comforting arm around Ricky's shoulders. Ricky doesn't relax immediately but they do lean a little closer, somehow finding the weight of EJ's arm around them safe.

They eventually reach EJ's locker and Ricky smiles a bit because it's directly across from Sharpay's famous pink lockers. "Did you choose this spot specifically for Sharpay's lockers?"

EJ glances behind him and chuckles, rummaging through his stuff. "Oh yeah. If you say Ashley Tisdale three times in a row while touching her locker, you're guaranteed good fortune for at least a week."

Ricky looks at him with a smirk. "Have you tried that before?"

"Every year during finals week. I'm telling you, that shit works."

"Or maybe you're just really smart."

"Maybe," EJ says, finally locating his emergency stash of period essentials. "Or maybe it's just Ashley Tisdale bopping me to the top."

That's when Ricky lets out a laugh — an honest to god booming belly laugh that makes EJ pause just to stare at him. They look... nice like this. Without the worry lines and longing gazes at a girl who won't give them the time of day. They look just like a little kid, carefree and alive despite the world crumbling all around them, and EJ feels a weird surge of pride at being the person who made Ricky laugh like that.

He wants Ricky to laugh like that more. He wants to be the person who makes Ricky laugh like that more.

And so the walls around Ricky crack a little further, and the drawbridge is opened for one weary traveler to come in.

EJ doesn't notice the cracks on his own walls, nor the knowing little princess who watches from the east tower, smiling.

"Hey, what are your pronouns?"

Ricky doesn't look up from their practice skateboard, concentrating hard on their balance. "I don't have any. I'm just Ricky." They look up though, giving EJ a warm smile. "But go ahead and use any pronouns with me. I don't mind if it's you."

"So would you mind if I call you your majesty?"

EJ doesn't miss the flush on Ricky's cheeks at that and definitely doesn't miss the way they say "I'd like that very much." with the barest hint of embarrassment.

"Okay," EJ says with his chin propped up in his hands. "Your majesty."

Ricky falls off of their practice skateboard then, soon glaring up at a cackling EJ still with a blushing face.

EJ forgot his binder today.

And his body loved reminding him every time he took a step.

Thankfully, there wasn't going to be water polo practice today and he could get away with wearing multiple layers to school. But even with the sports bra, the t-shirt, the sweatshirt, and the letterman jacket doing a good job at making his chest look flat, he still felt his skin crawl looking at the mirror. His jeans hugged him a little too tightly, forcing him to notice the still feminine curve of his hips. His sports bra was a tad smaller than the last time he wore it, so the pinch at his chest doubled in size.

EJ resolved that he was not going to have a good day today.

But today was tech rehearsals and he couldn't ditch that. He was starting to really enjoy rehearsals now that he and Ricky are on good terms. Even the stage managers ask him to hang out with them time to time outside of rehearsals. EJ actually felt like... he really belonged somewhere now. And he wasn't going to let this ruin it for him. Not today.

"Hey EJ," He heard Nini say to him as he got out of his car. "What's with all the layers? It's pretty hot today."

"It's one of those days, Neens." He says with a heavy sigh and Nini just grabs his hand and gives it a reassuring squeeze. Ricky rolls up to them two seconds later, their head suspiciously missing a helmet.

"How many times do I have to tell you to wear a helmet when you're skateboarding, Ricky?" EJ tries to scold the junior despite this weirdly overwhelming fondness growing inside of him every time he even looks at Ricky now.

"Haven't gotten into an accident yet," Ricky shrugs, smiling politely at Nini and changing it into a cocky little smirk the second they look at EJ.

"Yet being the operative word here," EJ rolls his eyes and opens his trunk for Ricky to stash his board in for later. "I won't drive you to the hospital if you end up getting a concussion for not wearing a helmet."

"Yes you will." Ricky says, knocking their shoulders together. "You love me!"

EJ freezes for a bit but before he could even respond, Ricky is already catching up to Big Red and Gina, waving back at EJ and Nini with a wide grin. EJ stares at him for a few seconds, not quite sure how to process the last few moments, until Nini waves a hand in front of his face.

"Hello? Earth to EJ?"

"Huh?"

"Care to share with the class what's going on?" The little smirk on her lips says it all and EJ was not going to fall for that.

"Nope. There's nothing to share."

"Mhm," She says, looping her arm around EJ as soon as he closed his trunk. "Of course there isn't, EJ." Nini pretends not to see EJ staring at Ricky as they walk into school. EJ pretends to not notice that she's pretending to not see EJ pretending to not overtly stare at Ricky.

Besides, EJ has gotten pretty good at pretending.

Aaaannndd that's it for now. I hope you guys liked that! I really enjoyed exploring trans!ej and genderqueer!ricky through this au and it means a lot to me. Maybe next time I'll write something in ricky's pov but for now thanks for reading !!

#ej caswell #ricky bowen #nini salazar roberts #rj #hsmtmts #trans!ej #genderqueer!ricky #tw: gender dysphoria #tw: transphobia #tw: neglectful parents #cloud's writing now #hsmtmts fanfiction #they're not really together yet here but #ej is Definitely pining at the end tho #and nini is the best i will not tolerate nini slander in my blog #caswen #ricky x ej #ej x ricky

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irikahkrios · 3 years

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@spookyvalentine tagged me to do this oc meme for emmett! thanks for the tag!!

General-

Name: emmett richard shepard

Alias(es): none really. his family and partners call him em i guess

Gender: trans male

Age: early thirties for most of the parts of his story that i like to concentrate on lmao (me2/me3)

Birthdate: september 5, 2154. that's right he doesn't have the "canon" shepard birthday in april, he shares my birthday and bioware can't stop me

Place of birth: spaaaace

Hometown: spaaaaace (real answer: various ships lmao he doesn’t set foot on earth until he’s 18)

Spoken language(s): just english i think? though i do enjoy the thought of him learning bits and pieces of his partners' languages so they can communicate at least a little bit without translators. that's cute

Sexuality: bisexual, though i think he's been with more men than women

Occupation: very exhausted space marine at the time of canon, and stage actor and eventually high school drama teacher postcanon.

Appearance-

Eye color: green

Hair color: red

Height: 5'6" and about a half inch

Scars: one across his eyebrow and one under his chin (usually hidden by his beard) from uh. “incidents” with his birth parents, and some others he’s gotten from his military service over the years. they’re all gone after he’s rebuilt, and it fucks him up quite a bit.

Favorite-

Color: yellow

Hair color: like on a partner? i think he likes dark hair, but it doesn't come up often as he’d rather date nonhumans. on himself he's perfectly fine with his natural ginger

Song: i wouldn't say he's got a favorite song, he listens to a lot of music and it’s kind of hard to pick. but abba's voulez-vous is his favorite album of all time

Food: cheesecake, any kind of potato hash, peaches, barbecue pulled pork

Drink: red bull, limeade, apple cider, eggnog, cold brew coffee. for alcohol, he loves fruity little cocktails.

Have They-

Passed university: not before the games, but years postcanon he goes to college to become a teacher

Had sex: boy has he

Had sex in public: almost certainly at least once. since thane doesn't show up at huerta in me3 in my rewritten canon i unfortunately can't take the thane/emmett hospital sex from the actual game as canon, but i do lowkey headcanon thane and irikah as being kinda into public sex and i think they've pulled him into a supply closet somewhere at least once lmao. also i know it doesn't count as public but it's worth mentioning that i think my canon's equivalent of that hospital scene is gonna be emmett/thane/irikah having sex on a table in an empty room at a drell rebellion base on kahje.

Gotten pregnant: once, postcanon!

Kissed a boy: yes

Kissed a girl: yes

Gotten tattoos: not sure? like, emmett definitely seems like the type to have at least one tattoo, but i just haven't been able to think of anything specific so far that really fits. in my pirate fic he does end up with magical glowing tattoos

Gotten piercings: his ears are pierced

Been in love: yes!! with three people at the same time!!

Stayed up for more than 24 hours: oh god yeah. emmett and irikah, both operating on zero hours of sleep, see each other in the living room at 3 in the morning and are like that spider-man meme

Are They-

A virgin: HAHA NOPE

A cuddler: yes :') he gives great hugs

A kisser: yes!!! a good kisser. though the beard can tickle

Scared easily: yes, but he's extremely good at pushing the fear down and acting like it isn't there in order to do whatever he has to do.

Jealous easily: nope!

Dominant: assuming this means in bed, lmao not really. he’s more than willing to step into that role if it makes his partner(s) happy though

Submissive: once again assuming this means in bed, um. very :)

In love: yes he is!!

Single: very much not!! he has three (3) entire partners

Random Questions (took out the darker ones bc i'm not really in the proper headspace to answer those)-

Do they have / have they had a job: space marine but just for the healthcare. at 18 he was like fuck the military but i would like to not have tits please :) and then he just never left

Have any fears: anything involving his bodily autonomy being taken away (part of why he hates liara so much), losing people he cares about, and thresher maws.

Family-

Sibling(s): 4 adoptive siblings, 2 older (flint and cynthia) and 2 younger (clark and eloise). he also counts his clone, dick (who survives in my canon), as a sort of sibling in a weird way. often introduces him to people as his brother, when he doesn’t feel like answering all the questions that spring from “my clone who cerberus grew for spare parts when rebuilding me, who escaped and eventually tried to kill and replace me but i saved his life and helped him realize he could become his own person so we’re cool now and he comes over for holiday dinner every year.” he gets so used to introducing dick as his brother that i think at one point he accidentally introduces him as such to his siblings.

Parent(s): his adoptive moms, hannah and natalie shepard. there's also technically his shitty birth parents if you wanna count them, but he killed his dad in self-defense with his biotics at 12 and hasn't seen his bio mom since being taken away by child protective services afterwards.

Children: two postcanon! his son norius (turian) and daughter juniper (human)

Significant other: his husbands garrus and thane and wife irikah :’)

Pet(s): a few cats postcanon! i have never bought any of the fish or the hamster in-game

#emmett shepard tag #this was so fun thank you so much for the tag val

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keanureevesisbae · 4 years

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Mister Cavill, your dog is kinda fat - Chapter 16

Summary: Veterinarian Olivia Tran has zero time for bullshit. After becoming a mom at age twenty three, the one thing she wants is a good life for her daughter Vanessa. Her ex didn’t want anything to do with her nor the baby and she decided that man are officially banned out of her life. But then she meets Henry Cavill at her clinic and her ban slowly starts to crumble apart. Henry on the other hand is looking for one thing: a family. And when he meets Olivia Tran, he finds just that.

Henry Cavill x Olivia Tran (ofc)

Warnings: None

Wordcount: 2.6k

Masterlist // Previous chapter // Next chapter

I had been feeling a bit weird for a week now. Ever since Henry and I got back from our little getaway, I felt pretty nauseous, but I have that from time to time, so I didn’t think anything of it. Things started to get a whole lot worse, when I went back to work. I nearly vomited all over multiple dogs, because of the smell of their disgusting anal glands. Normally they don’t bother me that much. The smell isn’t my favorite of course (and I wouldn’t make a perfume out of it), but nearly vomiting because of it, that has never happened before.

I became more and more tired and my breasts start to hurt a lot more, but yet again, I didn’t suspect anything. It was until I was laying down on the couch, while Vanessa was doing groceries with Henry. Kal plopped next to me on the couch and placed his head protectively on my stomach.

And that’s when I was starting to suspect something.

I could be pregnant.

And basically this was all my fault. While I had been constantly pressing about how we are not ready to add another baby to our family yet, I hadn’t been consisted with my birth control and never once urged Henry to wear a condom.

In these four days I have been acting like a total zombie (and knew damn well why, though I claimed otherwise), I kept beating myself up about it and the longer I kept quiet about it, the more I hated myself.

I mean, Wesley ran away, so why would this time be any different? Henry could always decide that this isn’t what he wanted. Men are pigs, they have proven me that, but I was absolutely blindsided by Henry and his love, that I might have missed some signs.

After I dropped the “I think I might be pregnant”-bomb on Henry, he hasn’t said anything. He keeps on staring at me and I have no clue what he is thinking. Is he anger? Is he sad? Is he disappointed?

‘You think you are pregnant,’ he finally manages to say. ‘How are you not sure?’

Okay, he hasn’t lost his ability to communicate, that is a good sign right? ‘I haven’t taken the test yet.’

He nods and simply stares at me. Why is that making me uncomfortable? He needs to say something!

‘I have been pretty tired,’ I whisper, ‘and nauseous and my breasts hurt. Then Kal placed his head on my stomach, in a way he never did.’ I let out a shaky sigh and add: ‘And also, I have been pretty inconsistent with my birth control and we have been having a lot of… You know, we engaged in tons of unsafe bedroom activities.’

He is still not saying anything.

‘Henry, please, just say something to me.’ Tears burn in my eyes, while my doubts turn into realities. He doesn’t want me, nor Vanessa, nor this possible baby. ‘You know, I should go, I’m really sorry.’

‘Why are you apologizing?’ he asks, stopping me in my tracks with his words.

Now I don’t know what to say. ‘Why shouldn’t I be apologizing?’

‘This is what we wanted, right?’

Is he serious?

Come to think of it, of course he is serious. I mean, I feel like that man was totally ready to get me pregnant the second I agreed to having a kid with him in the future.

I really shouldn’t have underestimated him.

‘Sweetheart,’ he whispers, ‘you shouldn’t feel guilty about not being consisted with your birth control. Besides it takes two people to get pregnant and we don’t even know for sure yet, do we now?’

I shake my head, because he is right. It does take two people to get pregnant.

‘You haven’t taken a test yet and since you haven’t been taking your birth control steadily, isn’t it possible that you can get your period any minute now?’

‘Henry, it’s been six to seven weeks since I last had my period.’

He blinks. ‘Oh.’

‘I’m so scared,’ I whisper in a hoarse tone, with a voice crack in the process. ‘I’m really scared.’

‘Why is that, sweetheart?’ He takes a step closer to me, his hands holding onto mine.

‘Because so much is going to change,’ I say. ‘And what if you leave?’

He shakes his head. ‘I get that you are scared,’ he says, ‘because so much is going to change, that is true. But you have to remember: I’m right here. I’m right here with you and I’m not leaving you. Sweetheart, I’m no Wesley, please remember that. I’m am currently no Wesley, nor will I ever lower myself to be him. I’m here for you to stay. Every step of this journey.’ He pulls me closer to him, before he wraps his strong arms around my waist. ‘The second you and I get home,’ he tells me, ‘I’m going to buy a test for you.’

My heart swells with nothing but love. How on earth could I have underestimated this man? This beautiful human, who has shown me nothing but love and compassion. I feel so stupid now for thinking that low of him. ‘I know this might be hard for you,’ I tell him, ‘but could you please not say anything to anyone?’

‘I’m going to try,’ he chuckles, his cheeks a little bit more pinkish than before, maybe from happiness or hold in tears. ‘It might be a challenge, but I’m going to try.’ Henry presses kisses in my neck and whispers: ‘I’m so happy, sweetheart. I can’t believe that this is truly happening. Not only will I be a dad to Vanessa, but to a possible other kid too.’

This is such a different reaction. I still have nightmares about the disgusted look on Wesley’s face when I told him I was pregnant for real. I only think I’m pregnant now and Henry is ready to set up the entire nursery. ‘I love you so much, Henry. I’m so sorry I didn’t tell you. I truly am.’

‘Oh sweetheart,’ he whispers, leaning back a bit, so he can look at me. ‘You don’t need to feel sorry, ever. I understand you were scared, especially with what that idiot Wesley did.’ He gives me a long kiss on my lips. ‘But remember, sweetheart, I love you more.’

≫≫≪≪

It feels good to have told Henry. I was pretty stupid for thinking that he would leave me for this. I mean, we are talking about Henry. Henry Cavill. During the rest of our visit at his parents house, he kept beaming with pride and everyone was wondering what the hell was going on inside his head. When we were a bit secluded from his family, he kept kissing me, touching me and I never felt more loved.

He kept his promise. The second we got home, he went out for some groceries, giving me time to cuddle up with Vanessa. We are on the couch as I spoon my little girl as we watch some television. When Vanessa was younger, I made these idiotic and unrealistic measurements: no television, no sweets. Now I turn on the television myself, because I want to know what Winnie the Pooh is about to do now.

But I do realize, that as soon as we add another baby into the mix, it’s all going to be different and what is happening here, will not happen again.

I think Vanessa would be a great big sister. I know she would. She keeps on telling me that she’ll be such a wonderful big sister and I believe her right away. Though I don’t like Bettie’s mom, Bettie herself is a pretty sweet kid and Vanessa is such a sweetheart to all of Bettie’s little siblings.

But I also know that taking care of another child is going to mean a little less attention for Vanessa. She has been my one and only for so long and she got so much attention from Henry since he came into our lives: how will she handle this?

What if she thinks that Henry and I are going to love the other baby more than we love her? I press pause on the remote control and nudge Vanessa. ‘Sweetheart, can you do something for mommy?’

‘Of course,’ she says.

‘Can you give me a hug?’

Vanessa’s eyes light up and she turns around, so she can cuddle up against me. ‘I always want to give you hugs, mommy.’ She has been really desperate for my attention today and I feel so bad for making her feel a little less important. Normally, I notice everything she does, but seeing her like this because I missed something important, that breaks my heart.

‘You know I love you right?’

‘I know,’ she says. ‘Daddy told me you were feeling a bit sick, so I know you can be a bit tired and grumpy. But that’s okay, I still love you too.’

Sometimes I wonder how I managed to raise a young girl that is so well spoken. In school she always scores at the top of communication skills. Now her work is sometimes lacking and she is easily bored and because she has such strong communication skills, she has to stand on the hallway a lot because of her foul mouth, but other than that, I’m so proud of her.

Parents are always impressed with the way she introduces herself, before she plays with their kids. I was often afraid that she wouldn’t be accepted by her friends, her peers, because she was a lot better in communicating, but the other kids didn’t mind. They actually start to look up to her.

She is such a strong little person and I’m so proud of her.

‘Yeah, but remember: no matter how grumpy, tired, annoyed of sad I am, I will always love you.’

‘I know,’ Vanessa says. She has a tendency to push her hand under my shirt and place it on my back and right now, it’s no different. ‘I can’t wait until daddy officially adopts me.’

‘I can’t wait either.’ I press a kiss on her forehead and sighs deeply, yet content. The door opens and Kal barks in excitement. Normally Vanessa would’ve jumped up to rush to Henry, but now she stays put.

Henry walks into the living room and smiles brightly when he sees us. ‘There are my two favorite girls,’ he says, placing the bag on the table. He pulls out some chocolate. I know what he wants to do, but we both decided that we would wait until Vanessa was in bed. Time does go by faster when there is chocolate involved and he knows it. ‘Is there room for one more?’ he asks.

‘Always,’ Vanessa says with a smile. ‘Dad, you go where I was laying, so I can cuddle on your chest.’

Henry chuckles and positions himself right next to me. Vanessa curls up on his broad upper body. ‘Who wants some chocolate?’ he asks.

Vanessa opens her mouth and when I see him feeding her a piece of chocolate, I think to myself how much he loves being a dad. The role of being a father suits him so much.

I know he is going to be there for me, for Vanessa and all the babies we’ll eventually have. I’m so lucky to have this, this family. I never knew I wanted to have a family with a husband, a dog and kids. I thought that I’d be with Vanessa, until she was old enough to go to college and I’d still be a vet, a little older than forty and have an empty nest.

But now I’m going to have it all. I’m going to have a man who I probably will marry one day. I’m going to have kids. A house. A dog.

‘Have you been sweet to your mom?’ he asks Vanessa.

‘I’m always sweet to my mom.’

‘I know you are,’ he chuckles. ‘What is the plan for tonight?’

I place my head on his shoulder and my hand on Vanessa’s back. ‘This little girl has to go to bed early, because she has school tomorrow.’

Vanessa pouts, but realizes that won’t work. ‘Okay,’ she mumbles, before she yawns. ‘But I’m not tired yet.’

Henry chuckles. ‘Well, I have an idea. How about you try to stay in your own bed for as long as you can tonight?’

‘But daddy, what if I get scared?’

He shakes his head. ‘I don’t think that will happen, because Kal can sleep in your room tonight and the nights after that.’

Normally we wouldn’t allow Kal to sleep in her bed, but I think this is a smart move from Henry. When we bring a new baby in the mix, we need to make sure that Vanessa is loved and cared for properly, because a new baby is going to take lots of our time. And this is something that she wanted for so long already.

‘Really?’ she asks. ‘Mommy, you think this is a good idea?’

‘I do,’ I say with a smile.

Vanessa jumps off Henry and rushes to Kal. ‘You can sleep in my bed tonight. I’m going to get ready!’ She sprints upstairs and Kal follows her, barking loud.

‘You, my love,’ I whisper to him, ‘are a very smart man.’

Within record time Vanessa and Kal are ready for a good sleep. We give them both a big kiss and leave on her night light. I smile as I stare at my sweet daughter, who is maybe becoming a big sister very soon.

Henry and I go back downstairs. ‘You ready to take the tests?

‘Tests?’ I repeat. I search through the grocery bag, only to discover that Henry bought eight tests. ‘Sweetheart, one was enough.’

He blushes. ‘I just want to make sure.’

I lean in, giving him a kiss, before I walk to the restroom. I somehow managed to pee on all three of them and I know we have to wait at least two minutes.

It’s weird seeing Henry this nervous. He paces around the living room and I tilt my head as I watch him take a few steps, turn around, take another few steps before turning again and repeating it. ‘How much longer?’

‘One more minute,’ I answer. ‘Sweetheart, come here.’ I sit on the table and pull him in a hug. ‘No matter what the outcome is, we’ll get through it.’

‘But if it’s negative,’ he whispers, ‘what are we going to do then?’

I can’t stop my smile. ‘That means we have to try a whole lot harder to get pregnant,’ I say.

His eyes light up and he chuckles nervously, as if he can’t believe what I just said. ‘Are you serious?’

‘I figure that we shouldn’t wait too long. I know I want you to be the father of my kids. I know you want a bigger family.’ I pull him in for a long kiss and whisper: ‘And I don’t want to wait any longer.’

‘Shit, Olivia,’ he whispers. ‘I love you so much, baby.’

‘I love you too.’

‘Time’s up?’

I look at the clock and nod. ‘Yes, time’s up. Ready?’

‘More than ready.’

We both look at all three of the tests and they are all positive. Holy shit, we are going to have a baby, I think to myself. Henry’s eyes are filled with tears, causing me to cry as well. ‘Oh my God,’ I whisper.

‘We’re going to have a baby,’ he says. ‘We are going to become, truly, the Cavill-Tran clan.’

‘Tran-Cavill clan, but okay.’

He rolls his eyes, before he pulls me in for the most intense kiss he has ever given me. ‘You bet your ass I’m going to take such good care of all of you,’ he whispers against my lips. ‘And I’m going to make sure you won’t ever ever regret having kids with me.’

#henry cavill #henry cavill x ofc #henry cavill x oc #mister cavill your dog is kinda fat #henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill x Olivia Tran

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herebegods · 3 years

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Beyond The Reach of Mortal Man - Sample "So how close are we to the black hole?""Closer than I want to be." Xavier flicked another watermelon seed out into the darkness beyond his shack, a darkness made all the less luminescent for the large round patch of utter blackness that crossed above their heads in the sky. There were three stars nearby, as such things are measured, that stood prominent in the sky during the nights on Terminus Two, but there was no central source of light or heat in this system. What little light the local stellar bodies provided to the lonesome planets that orbited the black hole was insufficient to provide either heat or energy sufficient for any native life to have arisen. At least, that had been the prevailing theories prior to the coming of mankind. The trans-quantum chamber sent to this remote system by Intra-Galactic Colonial Company had been a gamble of the kind usually shunned by the old-fashioned colossus of space colonization corporations."And there's a planet that orbits even closer?""Oh yeah. Terminus One. In about an hour, you'll be able to see it whip right around the hole at unbelievable speeds.""Because it's so close?""Exactly."Xavier continued flicking watermelon seeds out into the darkness, uncaring where they landed. Earth species of flora had no chance surviving here, none of them had anything close to the proper mechanisms in their DNA to harness the types of radiation emitted by the black hole, the types of radiation the local plants thrived on. All the watermelon seed could do on this alien world was serve as food for one of the small variety of fauna that normally fed on the native plants. Howard stared up at the black hole, the yawning gap of sky amongst so many stars, in awe and wonder. Unlike his host, he had not yet gotten used to the extraordinary nature of this world and the celestial object it orbited. He had only arrived yesterday."Is there anyone on Terminus One?"Xavier laughed, as if he had been asked a question by a small child. "Hell no! Oh, there are a dozen or so satellites and landers we put there in the first few decades, but no one was mad enough to actually go there in person!""Why? It's not like the planet is going to de-orbit any time soon.""No, not for another thousand years, they reckon. It's not fear of being sucked into the hole. Think about it. That sucker is orbiting the hole once every five hours, right? And it's tidally locked. Do you have any idea how extreme the forces are battling to tear that planet apart? Ever hear of the volcanoes of Io? The spouts of Terminus One put those to shame. There aren't many places I'd rather not be than on Terminus One. The satellites we put in orbit around it did not last very long either."Howard Goodhand nodded, not understanding beyond the surface layman comprehension, what the scientist who had invited him to this strangest of colony worlds was describing. It was enough, though. Terminus One was not a place where man would walk. The actor sat in silence and let his wonder and imagination run wild among the stars above, delighting every time the brighter ones slid behind the black hole, momentarily growing far larger to his vision as the gravity lens surrounding the fantastically dense central body of this system magnified the ancient light before blocking Howard's view entirely. This was a spectacle unlike any he had ever seen before, and Howard considered himself very well traveled, highly urbane in an age with ever greater wonders to behold and an infinite variety of manners to be entertained."Somehow, I expected it to be brighter. I know, silly idea, a black hole being brighter. But all the images....""All of the images the public sees are either of far larger black holes, the super-massive ones that are constantly consuming matter, or are taken in different spectrums than the human eye can see.""Still... This is so close, so easy to access, so... there. Why does no one know of this? Where are the tourists?"Xavier tossed a rind after the seeds and wiped his hands off on a hand-cloth as he replied, "Oh, there are tourists. Mostly government types looking to put down roots and take over. There are also the corporate overseers from IGCC, far more than our little colony or research mission warrant, who are 'inspecting' operations. Some of us suspect they want to keep this little gem of a destination all to themselves, but I dunno. That smells of conspiracy theory to me.""What's your explanation, then?""Ignorance.""You mean, no one knows this is here?""Well, partially that. It's not exactly a traditional sort of vacation spot. I don't figure too many folks search for holiday destinations with a distinct lack of sunlight. Wandering around in darkness looking up at the lack of stars isn't for everyone, not with so many other options available. But no, I don't mean that sort of ignorance. Do you know how many humans there are out there, among the populated worlds?"Howard blinked as he contemplated the question, "I'm not sure anyone knows that.""Rough guesstimate.""Trillions, easily.""Right, so even if only, say, one percent of one percent of mankind knew about this place, and only one percent of one percent of those chose to come here, even for an hour, on a lark, how many tourists should we have?""Tens of thousands, at least."Xavier nodded and finished off his beer before continuing, "We're not classified secret, you know. Did you have to go through customs on your way here?""No, just gave the destination name to the operator, and here I am.""So what's stopping the rest of them? I reckon it's ignorance. I suspect they are scared of that." Xavier waved upward toward the black hole. "They're afraid if they jump, they'll get sucked into the sky. Or that the whole planet will crash into the event horizon the moment they arrive."Howard frowned. He had never liked this pessimistic side of his old college roommate, always believing the worst of the human race. Yet, he could think of no easy counter to the argument. Perhaps it was just a lack of marketing. Scientists, and the population of Terminus One was almost entirely composed of scientists, were not well known for their marketing talents. For now, he kept quiet. The central event of the afternoon was unfolding as a relatively bright object passed through the gravity lens so fast it flashed in the sky, before starting its swift transit across the surface of the black hole named Terminus, obscuring the relatively and literally smaller object in the sky. This had to be the super-earth, Terminus One, the closest orbiting planet in the system, long ago stripped of any atmosphere or oceans it might have once possessed, now locked in the final millennium of its slow death, just one more insignificant bit of matter to feed the insatiable appetite of its host. Terminus Two was far closer in its orbit to the black hole than Earth was to Sol, allowing for the bright spec of Terminus One to stand out quite clearly to the human eye against the darkness that would eventually consume it.After the doomed inner planet blipped through the gravity lens on the far side of its transit and was once more obscured by the vastness of stars in the background, Howard turned once again to Xavier, who had started in on another piece of watermelon and was not paying attention to the sky show. Howard asked, "So, why isn't this planet named like the rest of the colonized worlds?""What, named after an old earth capital? Simple, this isn't a colonized world. Hell, it's not even open to colonization. The IGCC turned over all rights and claims to the world within the first year to the academies, who in turn banned colonization. Technically, this is a nature reserve. Some of us style it an astrophysiological reserve, but they don't allow us to name stuff."As with most interactions these days with his old friend, Howard was unsure if Xavier was attempting a joke. They had not exactly seen eye to eye in college, but at least then Xavier had still possessed various traits that could be considered normal, including a sharp wit and a biting sense of humor. Since those years, Howard had found it increasingly difficult to tell if his friend was amused by the tribulations and contradictions of humanity, or was in fact misanthropic. Rather than dwelling on this line of thought, Howard changed topics, "So, why did you invite me here? I mean, I'm grateful, this is truly something to behold, but you have been here for ten years...""Eleven years.""Eleven years now, and this is the first time you thought to have me over to see what you've been working on?"Xavier chuckled, spitting out a few seeds as he did, "I always knew you were wasted in the movie business. You should have taken up a science." Howard ignored the slight on his profession and waited for his friend to actually answer his inquiry. Xavier tossed this latest rind after the last dozen and responded while wiping his hands again, "We need funding.""For what, exactly?" Xavier passed a handbrain over to Howard and went back to eating watermelon while his friend thumbed through the summary of the proposal. Howard whistled slowly as he got to the specs, and the projected budget, "I don't know what you've heard or read about me online, but I'm not nearly wealthy enough for something like this.""No shit. If the academies, with endowments large enough to blot out any sun, can't afford to foot the bill for this project, no one alive has enough money to fund it themselves. No, I didn't bring you here to ask for your money. But we still need funding, and I think you can help us." Read the rest of the story here: https://www.patreon.com/posts/60238913

#scifi #novela #black hole #science #fundraising

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thatonerandomfan4 · 3 years

Text

Rockwell’s History [READ WARNINGS]

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Fandom: Madness Combat

Characters: Dr. Crackpot, Dr. Hofnarr, Dr. Jebediah Christoff, Phobos, Hank, Sanford, Deimos, 2BDamned, Jebus, Tricky, Rockwell (My OC), Rockwell’s Parents

Warnings: Violence, Blood, Death, Gore, Attacking, Detailed Gore Scenes, Cursing, Transphobia, Crying, Injuries, Very Sensitive Topics, Angst, Heavy Angst, Long Story

Summary: Talking About Rockwell’s Backstory And How He Became Part Of The Madcom Group.

Word Count: 2,681

Notes: Rockwell Is Trans. His Original Name Was Roxannie (Pronounced As Roxanne) Roxannie Will Be In The First Half Of The Fic Until She Makes The Transition.

If You Feel Very Uncomfortable/Dislike The Topics That Are Going To Be In This Fic, Please Leave The Fic Now So You Don’t Have To Experience It And Triggers You.

Also, If You Dislike Fics That Involves Peoples Made Up Characters (OCs), Then You Are Welcome To Leave The Fic.

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Roxannie Woke Up To Her Alarm Clock And Quickly Got Dressed, Heading Downstairs To Get Breakfast. Her Mother Greeted Her With A “Good Morning” And A Warm Smile. Roxannie Sat At The Table, Greeting Her Father. She Took One Bite Of Her Cereal Until The Table Was Knocked Over. With A Frightened Look, She Looked At Her Father And Screamed. His Head Was Chopped Clean Off With His Chest Wide Open, Revealing That His Internal Organs Were Tampered With. She Was About To Cry Until She Heard Her Mother Scream.

Instead Of Staying At The Table, She Ran To The Room Her Mother Was In. As Soon As Roxannie Stepped Foot In The Living Room, She Was Met With A Horrifying Sight.Her Mother Was Brutally Cut In Half With Her Face Missing From Her Head. The Top Half Of Her Body Hung From The Ceiling By A Sword Which Impaled Her. The Bottom Half Of Her Body Was On The Floor, In A Pile With Her Internal Organs. Annie Almost Gagged At The Sight, Until She Saw The Man Who Had Caused Her Parent’s Deaths. A Tall Dark Figure With Red Eyes Approached Her With A Hammer. It Grabbed Her Firmly By The Neck And Bashed Her Head Twice, Revealing Her Brain.

It Left Her On The Ground Struggling To Stay Alive, Leaving Only A Tablet Behind. Rox Used It To Contact For Help, But Could Barely Stay Conscious Due To Her Brain Being Exposed. Luckily, There Was A Fast Response. The Mysterious Person Was Immediately Able To Track Her Location And Tell Her To Stay Where She Is. She Agreed And Just Laid In Front Of The Tablet, Trying Not To Lose Consciousness. About 45 Minutes Had Passed So Far, And She Was Starting To Feel Her Eyelids Get Heavy.

A Man Rushed In And Immediately Injected Her With Some Type Of Medicine. She Immediately Struggled To Stand Up, Before Being Forced To Sit Down. Her Head Was Bandaged Properly Before She Was Helped Up. She Didn’t Even Get A Chance To Thank The Strange Man Because He Immediately Rushed Her Out Of The House And Into His Vehicle. The Whole Car Ride Was Quiet Except For Roxannie’s Cries, Mourning The Death Of Her Parents.

She Couldn’t Even Form Sentences Or Explain To The Man That Saved Her What Happened Because Of How Upset She Was. He Felt Bad For Her, Trying To Give Her Anything She Could Keep Her Mind Busy With Until They Got To The Place. She Didn’t Really Want Anything Though, Other Than To Let Out What She Was Experiencing Now. Once They Arrived To Their Destination, She Was Immediately Brought Into A Lab Where A Bunch Of Scientists Were Working. The Man Led Her Into A Room Where A Small Chubby Man Chatted With A Tall, Stern Looking Guy.

Dr. ??: “Hofnarr, Christoff. I Uh….Got The Child.”

The Two Men Looked Over And Immediately Rushed To Roxannie. They Hugged Her And Did Their Best To Comfort Her In Any Way Possible In That Moment.

Dr. Christoff: “Thank You, Crackpot. We’ll Let You Know If We Need Anything Else.”

Crackpot Nodded And Left The Room, Leaving The 3 Alone As Christoff Shut The Door. Hofnarr Tried To Calm Her Down And Talk With Her. It Was Very Hard To Understand The Girl Through Her Crying And Incoherent Words, Even For Him. Hofnarr Just Held Her Close And Consulted Her, Doing His Best To Calm Her Down. Christoff Sat Down Next To The Two And Offered Rox With A Glass Of Water. She Took The Water And Drank Half Of The Glass, Keeping The Drink In Her Hand While The Two Older Men Did Their Best To Help Her Relax.

Once She Was Calm Enough, They Finally Got Her To Explain What Had Happened. She Told Them Every Detail From This Morning, Keeping It Short And Sweet At The End. Hofnarr And Christoff Frowned, Hugging And Comforting Her Again. It Was Very Hard For Someone To Go Through All That Trauma, Especially For Someone At Her Age. Hell, The Kid Was Only 14. She Barely Knew How To Even React Or See Something Like That. She Needed A Lot Of Therapy To Get Past That Traumatic Event.

Hofnarr: “Hey Christoff. Do You Think Phobos Will Let Us Keep Her Here With Us?”

Christoff: “Maybe, With A Lot Of Bribing.”

Roxannie: “F-Forgive Me For I-Interrputing Your C-Conversation...But Wh-Who’s Ph-Phobos?”

Hofnarr: “Oh! Don’t Worry, You Aren’t Interrupting Anything. And Phobos Is Our Boss. We Need All Permission From Him To Do Anything Around Here.”

Christoff: “Kinda Sucky, But We’re Even Lucky If He’s In A Good Enough Mood To Pay Us.”

They Chat For A Bit Before Heading To Phobos’ Office, Staying Together The Whole Trip. Once They Reached Their Destination, They All Greeted Phobos Before Saying Anything About Roxannie. Phobos Obviously Had To Ask First And The Two Scientists Explained The Whole Situation. Phobos Took A Minute To Think Before Accepting Their Request To Allow Her To Stay. Ending It With “I Don’t Care How, But As Long As She’s Not A Big Distraction To You Two And Works With What She Can.” Of Course They All Had To Agree To That.

They All Headed Out The Door And Back To The Breakroom. Hofnarr Figured She Was Still Hungry And Offered To Make Her A Snack And A Drink. Christoff Just Offered Her To Stay With Them So She Has A Place To Sleep And Stay Instead Of The Lab. Rox Agreed To Both And Walked With The Two Men. On The Way Back To The Lab, Hofnarr Was Smiling, Gently Gripping Onto Rox’s Hand. Christoff Took Notice Of This And Chuckled. He Watched His Husband For A While. It Was Only Now When He Asked About His Sudden Cheery Mood.

Christoff: “What’s Got You All Giddy, Hoffy?”

Hofnarr: “We Have A Child Of Our Own Christoff! Aren’t You Excited To Be A Parent?”

Christoff Just Smiled As Hofnarr Went On About The Wonders Of Raising A Child Of Their Own. He Goes On Fantasies About Vacation, Family Outings, Family Dinners And Other Things. Roxannie Gripped Her New Parent’s Hands Gently, Smiling Softly. She Was Going To Start A New Family And These Were Her New Parents. She Didn’t Mind That, She Loved Supporting People Who Were In Relationships With The Same Gender.

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A Few Years Later…

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Hofnarr: “Rox, You Ready?”

Roxannie: “Yeah I’m Coming!”

She Placed Her Bandana On And Adjusted It To Be Over Her Bandages, Flattening Out Her Lab Coat. She Turned The Light Off In The Bathroom And Headed Downstairs To The Door, Greeting Her Two Dads As They Hugged Her. They Headed Towards The Lab While Hofnarr Was Going On About How Lucky They Were To Be A Family. Christoff Occasionally Threw In A Few Things, Chuckling At Hofnarr’s Responses.

Once They Got To The Labs, Everything Seemed Normal Except For A Few Stressed Out Scientists. The Shaking Scientists Greeted The 3 And Gave Them Information To Keep Safe. Hofnarr Took Roxannie With Him As He Usually Does For The Morning. Christoff Set Out To His Office, Looking Around At The Messed Up Experiments. He Scoffed At The Thought Of Phobos Actually Trying To Be Successful With This….Project. Christoff And Hofnarr Agreed That This Whole “Project Nexus” Thingy Would Not Be On For Long. Someone Would Definitely Stop Him, Even If It Had To Be One Of Them.

Not Even A Minute Later, Hofnarr Had A Worried Look On His Face As The Sound Of Gunshots Could Be Heard From The Other Lab. Rox Stayed Close To Hofnarr Just In Case Anything Happened. They Kept Hearing Gunshots From The Other Lab, Not Knowing What On Earth Was Going Down. Hofnarr Was Upset, What Was Happening To His Husband? Was He Ok? Was He Hurt? He Held Onto Rox As He Tried Not To Cry About The Thoughts That Were Running Through His Mind.

Hofnarr: “I Hope Christoff Is Ok. I Don’t Want To Lose Him Like We Almost Lost You.”

Roxannie: “I-I’m Sure He’ll Be Ok, Dad. And Hey, If I’m Still Here, He’ll Still Be Here.” *She Hugged Him Close. Hofnarr Gave Her A Soft Yet Sad Smile.*

Hofnarr: “I Sure Hope So.”

They Waited About 30 Minutes To Half An Hour Until Someone Entered The Room. As The Two Turned Around, Hofnarr Rushed To Hug The Man. It Was Christoff, And Thankfully He Wasn’t Injured That Badly As He Though. Christoff Went Over To Rox And Hugged Her, Handing Her A Gun As He Also Gave Hofnarr A Gun. He Wanted To Keep His Family Safe While This Whole Messed Up Thing Was Happening.

Hofnarr: “You’ve Made Quite A Mess Christoff.”

Christoff: “They’ve Gone Too Far. If We Don’t Stop This Now...”

A Few Agents Entered The Room, And Christoff Killed Them With The Help Of His Husband And Daughter. Hofnarr Sweated And Gulped, Keeping Roxannie Close To Him.

Hofnarr: “I See We Have No Other Choice…”

They Murdered The Agents Who Kept Coming And Headed Out. Hofnarr Unlocked All The Control Panels As The Continued Through The Lab, Killing Any Agents, Zombies Or Any Failed Experiments. It Took A While Until They Got The Whole Place Cleared But They Were Able To Do It Without Much Harm Going To Them. They Got To The Last Room With The Control Panel And Hofnarr Started Getting Worried. He Looked At Christoff While They Got Rid Of The Last Few Agents With Rox Guarding The Door.

Hofnarr: “Ya Know Phobos Will Finish Us For This.”

Christoff Looked At Hofnarr After Shooting The Last Agent, Ending The Life Of The Betrayer.

Christoff: “Phobos Better Watch His Back..”

Hofnarr Unlocked The Last Control Panel And Looked Around The Room. He Started Heading Out After Christoff And Roxannie, Staying Close To Them While They Walked. Eventually Hofnarr Took The Lead Of The Group To Make Sure That The Other Two Were Safe. He Opened The Door Outside For Them Both, And Closed It After They Were Far Ahead Of Hofnarr. He Followed Them And Took The Lead After A Few Minutes. He Then Looked At Christoff As They Approached Phobos’ Tower.

Hofnarr: “Everything Depends On You Now.” *He Used His Key Card To Unlock The Door And Let Christoff In, Keeping Roxannie Back* “Good Luck, Old Friend..”

They Watched Christoff Walk Into The Tower, And Headed Back To The Lab. Hofnarr Kept His Daughter Close To Him, Trying To Keep Her From Breaking Down Like How She Was When They First Met. They Knew Christoff Was Only Doing This For Their Own Good, And To Stop This Whole Thing From Ruining Nevada Even More. They Walked Into The Lab And Immediately Went To The Breakroom, Setting Their Weapons Down By The Table When They Got There.

They Got Some Food And Drinks While They Chatted, Sitting Down So They Wouldn’t Fall If One Was Upset Or Panicked. They Chatted About Christoff And How….Cold He Looked When He Walked Into Hofnarr’s Lab. Rox Was Scared By His Look, As It Was Her First Time Seeing Him Like That. Hofnarr Had Already Known This Look So He Was Pretty Used To It.

They Kept The Conversation Going By Talking About Other Stuff Like Work, Family Life, Dinners, And Especially That One Dinner Night. That Was The First Time Rox Had Seen Hofnarr Angry, And Not A Playful Or Slightly Irritated Angry. It Wasn’t His Fault They Were Banned From That Restaurant Though. The Boy Walked Up To Rox And Went “Tsk. You Wanna Be Trans? That’s Gross. You’re A Girl And You Will Always Be A Girl.” Hofnarr Was Just Defending His Daughter...By Attacking The Boy With A Chair.

They Were At The Lab For About An Hour To An Hour And A Half Just Chatting And Wandering Around. After A Bit, They Headed Outside And Met Up With Christoff Again.The Only Difference About Him Was That He Was Wearing The Key Fragment On His Head. Jeb Greeted The Two And Lead Them Back Inside The Lab. This Was Going To Be A Strange Experience For All Of Them.

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A Few More Long Years Later…

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Sanford And Deimos Turn The Corner, Shooting The Agents That Tried Approaching Them. The Two Headed Into The Room And Killed All The Agents In Sight. Then They Saw Her….Roxannie On The Floor Unconscious. They Both Inspected Her Body And Picked Her Up, Keeping Her With Them. They Finished With Their Mission And Brought Her Back To Base. The Brought Her To Hank And 2B Where They Inspected Her Body.

After She Woke Up, She Made A Request To The Doctor. She Wanted To Be A Man. The Doctor Hesitated Before Agreeing, Putting Her Under Anesthesia. He Waited A Few Minutes Before Finally Getting To Work. He Wrapped Him Up And Successfully Did Both Top And Bottom Surgery. Doc Finished With Replacing The Bandage On His Head, Cleaning The Wound Before Putting Anything On There.

After That, Doc Gave Rockwell Medicine To Help With The Pain. He Helped Rocky Walk And Get Used To Using The Bathroom. After That, Doc Gave Rockwell Some Clothes To Wear: A White Shirt With Ripped Sleeves, A Black Vest. A Belt To Go Over His Chest, Black Pants And Another Belt To Keep Them Up, Black Boots, Goggles With One Side Red And The Other Black And A Gas Mask. He Also Put His Hair Into A PonyTail.

Rockwell Put Everything On And Headed Outside, Ordered By Hank, To Fight The Clown. Rocky Took A Look At The Clown And…….Wait….That Lab Coat Looks So Familiar…..Was It..No It Couldn’t Be….HOFNARR?! But..He Looked Way Different Than Before.

Tricky: “WHO ARE YOU?! NEVERMIND THAT- CLOWN KILLS YOU!!”

Rockwell: “No Wait-!”

Tricky Whacked Rocky Pretty Hard In The Face, His Gas Mask Had To Be Removed. After Rockwell Removed His Goggles, Tricky Gasped And Dropped His Stop Sign..He Looked Like He Wanted To Cry.

Tricky: “Ro-Roxannie…?”

Rockwell, Holding His Jaw In Place: “It’th Rockwell Now, D-Dad.”

Tricky Immediately Hugged His Child, Healing His Jaw And Forming A Metal Plate Over The Injury. Rockwell Hugged Tricky Back, Both Squeezing The Shit Out Of Each Other. Tricky Kept His Son Close, Until They Heard Footsteps Approach From Behind Rockwell. It Was Jeb….Well...Christoff But He Didn’t Look That Different.

Jebus: “Tricky, What Are You Doing?! He’s On Hank’s Side!” *He Took Out His Binary Sword, And Swung It Up*

Tricky Backed Away And Ran To Jeb, Trying To Stop Him.

Tricky: “JEB NO HURT HIM!! GUY IS-”

It Was Too Late. Jeb Swung And Cut Rockwell Almost In Half.

Tricky: “Roxannie-”

Jeb Looked Frightened. Oh God, What Had He Done? He Removed His Sword And Watched Rockwell’s Limp Body Fall To The Ground. The Savior Broke Out In Tears. He Just Murdered His Own Child, Or He Thought He Did. He Was Relieved When He Heard Rockwell. He Was Still Alive! How? That Didn’t Matter, He Was Just Happy His Son Was Alive Still.

Jeb Rushed Over To Rockwell And Healed Him, Summoning Bandages And Wrapping Him Up. He Was Still Crying From What He Had Done. Tricky Joined Them Both, Starting A Group Hug With All Of Them As They Reunited. Sanford, Deimos, Hank And 2B Rushed Out As Tricky Helped Rockwell Up And Jeb Healed Him Again.

Sanford: “Oh Cool, So I Guess We Can Call A Truce.”

Deimos And 2B Agreed, Hank Didn’t. Wimbleton Didn’t Like The Idea Of Living With His Enemies, Especially If They Act Nice And Turn On Them In The End. Hank Disagreed And Left To Blow Off Some Steam, It Was Gonna Take A Long While To Convince Him. Sanford And Deimos Ended Up Adopting Rockwell While Tricky And Jeb Readopted Him. Rockwell Now Lives With The Crew, With Having 4 Parents Who Support And Care About Him, 2B Who Takes Care Of His Wounds And Trans Stuff, And Hank...

#madness combat #madness combat fanfic #madness combat oc #mc fanfic #mc oc #too lazy to tag the characters #Violence Blood Death And Gore #Attacking Detailed Gore Scenes Cursing Transphobia And Crying #Crying Injuries Very Sensitive Topics Angst Heavy Angst AndLong Story #angst #tw angst #long post #fanfic #my fanfic

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new-tella-us · 4 years

Text

Introducing The Komahinanami Family

(There are twelve people in this family, I have a problem.)

Hajime: People have told me that I have a very non-traditional family and they're right! I am a very open person when it comes to the people I let stay in my house. You don't need a traditional family to have a good family. Let's start simple; I'm transgender, female to male, this will come into play soon.

Next are my lovers. Yes, lovers, two of them. These two are my best friends and I wouldn't know where I would be without them. There's my husband, Nagito; he really affectionate, and a great listener, very loving and he's committed some war crimes but, I choose to ignore that. Despite everything, I still love this man.

Nagito: (Touch my husband and I will cut off your hands)

Hajime: Did you say something?

Nagito: No but, I'm very happy you think so highly of me despite my numerous faults.

Hajime: We still need to work on your confidence. Anyways then there's my wife, Chiaki; she's super sweet and kind, and huggable, she also died twice but again, I choose to ignore that. She's too precious not to love. But, she's not much of a talker.

Apparently Nagito and Chiaki don't love each other and they're just friends but, they love me so we all live together. I won't say they don't get jealous of each other but, if they do, they're good at hiding it since they both seem pretty content.

And then we have our nine children. Yes, you heard me right, NINE. First off is our youngest; Esperanza Komaeda, That's Chiaki and Nagito biological daughter but, even though she is not my biological child, I would still jump in front of a car for her, I see her as a daughter and I love her to bits. She's a talker, she loves conversation. I don't know where she gets it from, Nagito and Chiaki don't always like to talk.

Then there's Haru Hinata, the oldest of the little ones, remember how I said that I'm trans? Yeah, this is my biological son with Nagito. We suspect he might have autism; he's hasn't spoken yet and won't look us in the eyes. That amongst other things that are a bit too personal to share makes us think he on the spectrum. He's a curious little kid with an active imagination. He loves to draw literally anything that comes to his mind. He might grow up to be an artist.

And then there's the middle child of the three, Kokona Nanami; Kokona is a girl I found on the streets. She didn't have any parents or siblings so I took her in. We decided that this child would be mine and Chiaki's child since Nagito already has two biological ones. It's very obvious that she's adopted, for one; she doesn't share any traits with any of us and for two, she's Afro-Asian. She's very very shy, it took us a good few months before she talked to us at all but, even now, she mostly just writes or signs what she wants. The one thing about her is that, she often likes adapting to people so, I'm not sure if she's actually shy or if she's mimicking Haru to adapt to him. She's quite intelligent for her age and has a love of learning.

Now we can move onto our five older kids. Monaca Towa, Kotoko Utsugi, Jataro Kemuri, Masaru Daimon, and Nagisa Shingestu; they were once called the Warriors of Hope and they have committed several war crimes but, I love each and every one of them. When we found them, they all seemed a bit lost, Mentally I mean; and Nagito seemed to know them so we took them in. At that time, we only found four of them, Monaca was missing. Then one day, when I was just listening to some transmissions, I saw a rouge van in...space. Yeah, I know, it sounds weird. We were able to send one of our space devices to pull the van back down to earth and that's when we saw Monaca.

When I first saw Monaca, something seemed broken about her. She seemed so aimless. I had heard about her before from Nagito, from her former friends and from someone who ended up being her half brother and they all described her as ruthless, cut throat, manipulative, and confident. She wasn't any of those things when I saw her; if it wasn't for her physical description, I would have thought that this was a different Monaca. She looked so defeated, she actually reminded me of myself back at Hope's Peak. I decided to bring her home since I knew what it was like to be alone and I wouldn't wish that upon anyone.

The Warriors weren't happy to see her at first. It was understandable; from the way they described her, she betrayed them so it's only normal that they wouldn't want to see her. However, over time, they started to accept her and she started to become happier again. I'm glad that we took her in, I think she deserved a second chance.

And finally we have this random ten year old child named Kokichi Ouma. He is our self-proclaimed freeloader of the house. Why did he call himself that? Because, all he needed to do to get adopted was to sneak onto our island, break into our house, eat all of our food and never leave. We kind of just accepted that he was never going away so we remade the guest room into his room. He often plays with the other self-proclaimed freeloader at Souda's house, Miu Iruma. I think they snuck onto the island together.

And that's our big old happy family of twelve. Three adults, five teens, one child, and three toddlers. Is that too many people in our house? Yes, definitely. Am I stressed out beyond belief with family and work? 100%, I have hypertension, I have to take medication for it.

Would I change anything if I had the chance to? No, not at all. Seeing all of my family happy makes it all worth it.

(Yes, I know, I changed up a lot of things about this family from my previous posts but, I’m trying to see what sticks)

#danganronpa #danganronpa2 #danganronpa v3 #ultra despair girls #meet the family #Hajime Hinata #Nagito Komaeda #Chiaki Nanami #Monaca Towa #kotoko utsugi #masaru daimon #jataro kemuri #nagisa shingetsu #kokichi ouma #komahinanami #danganronpa oc

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theros · 3 years

Note

44 34 24 14 and 4

44. Something you like about your OCs in general?

gods. This is a really hard one to answer because I don't really know like... what I like about them all overall, as a group? Man I'm just in a corner making my action figures kiss.

34. Do you have any twin characters?

Yes actually! Nael and Kalvarian, my [redacted] ocs. (not a bad source, just a small fandom and I do not want them to descend on me if this post ends up in the search. I have very strong opinions about the author and the writing and about 99% of fans and would much rather hide in a corner with 4 friends whose opinions I do not hate.)

ANYWAY. They're fraternal twins, both binary trans, and unfortunately I will never finish the fic I have about them meeting the canon characters and causing confusion because canonically there's a sex-based caste system and the twins each match one of the castes of their actual gender. Every time I try to pick up the fic again I just can't seem to keep writing it, even though I had a whole outline for it and several scenes written from all across the timeline.

The sad thing is that as of the last time I checked the fandom tags on Ao3, it was the only fic touching the possibility of trans characters in this incredibly sex-based world and power system.

But anyway yeah, pretty much inseparable twins who would absolutely die to protect each other (and almost did twice) and who understand each other better than anyone else because they're apparently the only trans characters in multiple planes of existence.

... gods, one day I really should try to finish that fic. And maybe rewrite the published chapters since they're. Very very old and my writing has gotten a little better.

24. If you could meet one OC of yours, who would it be and why?

That's honestly a really really hard question for me? Half my ocs would probably not actually like me or my own insecurities would act up because they're so much stronger and cooler than me and I am a Basic Earth Person. Hm... Maybe Savai or Kolasi, my FFXIV Warriors of Light? Preferably before the storyline breaks Kol and makes her go from incredibly friendly peppy sunshine child to bitter and hurt and kind of lashing out at everyone. I dunno, I just feel like I'd end up swept along with her lol, grabbed by the arm as she runs to find something fun to do while we hang out, or a neat skill she could teach me. Sav is incredibly awkward and shy and 100% would not talk to me, but he's very expressive nonverbally and I'd be able to talk and hang out with him, and maybe make him smile by panting and stumbling to a chair like "Is she always this energetic????"

14. Introduce an OC with a tragic backstory

OKAY SO THIS IS THE REASON IT TOOK SO LONG TO REPLY TO YOU AND IT'S BECAUSE I WROTE OUT LYRIQ'S WHOLE DAMN STORY BUT NOBODY NEEDS THAT LONG BORING SUMMARY GOD

To shorten that WAY the fuck down, local pacifist and protector of her youngest sibling is forced to stop being a pacifist in order to try to protect people better and find her missing sister, only to run into her other sister and be forced to kill her because she's become a homicidal vampire fuckhead.

4. A character you rarely talk about?

... *picks up several warrior cats ocs and dumps them on the floor in front of you*

Granted, most of those don't have any actual character building done beyond color, place in clan, basic personality. So if I have to say someone who's at least a little more built out... Derek (VH, the ex-vault hunter on vaulthuntersuggestions, whose name I probably misspelled again bc I can't bloody remember how I spell his name each time).

Borderlands kind of became a minor trigger for me back in late 2018, so I really started neglecting VH as a character and not giving him nearly as much attention as my other "main" OCs. Hence his pretty stagnant state on VHS, without much in the way of character development. I really shouldn't even try to lump him in with my main OCs; I do because he has his own blog but his muse is so weak he really doesn't qualify.

Still, he is my beloved old man trying desperately to pretend he isn't actually a giant softie and dork and is definitely a rough-around-the-edges merc.

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kaimactrash · 3 years

Photo

The second pride image is my pan babies...and rilo...they are not a baby, they are a very bad person. XD

Also no, no I do not know how to even make my style cohesive for two images! I am a messy artist at heart.

Let's start with them, since they're in the top left, with the bright green skin and big black coat. Rilo is a gender fluid pansexual elder demon, theyre a primary antagonist in my story, but not due to either sexuality or gender. You may notice this mirrors my sexuality and gender, I kind of liked the idea of going out my way to have them be representative of a kind of intense feeling i get. So to explain, I hate hate hate when someone of any trans identity misbehaves, people tend to misgender them while angry at them, even though their misdeeds are nothing to do with their gender identity. I want rilo to be a character people have issues with not because of their identity, and that helps encourage people to not give shitty people the excuse to call your critisism about them invalid when you misidentify them intentionally and maliciously.Across the flag is another pan genderqueer character? YES, that cuz this is my neo sona, called Skeith Kai until I can make a better name, haha. they are joined by their pet meowclops, based on my pet cat toulouse...he has two eyes irl. Bellow Skeith Kai, with the huge maw of a mouth splitting her torso is one of my FAVOURITE EVER OCS, I don't draw her enough but I am so enamored by her. She IDs primarily as Non-binary as her umberella term, but the base one would be gender apathetic, she doesnt care or really see anything as gendered, she is fine with all pronouns, but having been called she by her family her whole life she tends to use it as second nature. She's a pretty cool girl, having began the story as essentially a merc for the bad guys, she quickly quits them cuz they kept getting their asses kicked, plus she and beefy get on like a house on fire.Beside moira with also pink hair is dylan! ...okay so shes a littler more complex than Moira in terms of redmeption, BUT!!! There are reasons for that are important in her story arc, and I'm not ready to explain my plan for her multichapter involvement in the story, but...give her time, she plays off as the typical high school cool bully girl stereotype, but theres a lot of work for me to do before dylan even apears in my comic. TT_TT Someone please give me potion of improved production times!!Lil teal skinned demon to the left of dylan is Greip Tavros, another fave oc of mine! Shes my only cyclops oc so far and she has really challenged me in recreating her look, shes short but buff as fuck, also no not inspired by bea, who i also LOVE btw, but yeah just a coincidence of some very slight simialrities in colour pallets. Greip is very laid back and chilled out, she cares little for the demon realm or the elders who run it, she pretty much takes her leave to return to Frenrar, because before she died, she lived on frenrar, the demons take people from earth and frenrar. She joins in the rebelion and traveling party lith is part of. Shes aromatic and pansexual EMESH, hes the armless deer... is centaur the right word in this case?? but yeah them! So basically frenrar is the planet of failed gods, emesh is one of them and if youre curious about I reccomend you read this profile of him: www.deviantart.com/kaimactrash…Lastly we have Melisa, a extremely under utalised character of mine, but shes quite fun, I have her and her husband basically as like my comfort oc couple, theyre super in love, super suppportive, and they litterally just wanna settle down and have kids. Shes a fantastic potion brewer, due to her high sense of smell, this is heightened because she is both partially blind and partially deaf. She has Open-angle glaucoma, which has left her with only central vision with colour blindness there, the rest of her vision is essentially blacked out from her perspective. Heaing wise shes hard of hearing due to noise damage as a child, she may need people to speak up, and with her husband bruce, they have developed some signs akin to the real worlds deaf blind signing, but much more basic as they've just developed it together, Bruce has actually enjoyed finding non-verbal ways to communicate with his with and others in his life.and thats all folks! hope you enjoyed this art, and enjoy the second half of this pride! Happy pride my fellow pan fanatics, it's a tough year for every memeber of this community, and I will never pretend we suffer the majority of the strife this community recieves, but we have our issues, and recently theres a amplification of the same anti-m-spec retoric people like myself who have id'd as such for some years now have had to hear way too frequently. Tho, dont get too down, the growth in pride and understanding of the variety of M-spec identities has improved so much! Hell, I'm still learning much about the other identites and the indivuals that experience them, and i hope to include more of my characters in the less mentioned identities in this group! Okay I'm gonna get off my soap box before some one pushes me off it.

#ocart #oc art #pride art #oc pride #pansexual #pansexuality #lgbtqia #pan

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queerlyhalloween · 4 years

Text

Not to sound like the joker™️ but i hate western society. I know that hair and clothes aren't gendered, so do most of my mates, ive been working hard at unlearning the internalized transphobia that's just a part of being trans in the UK and actually ALLOWING myself to think about going on hormones and dressing in ways other than "ambigious as possible" despite the fact im non-binary

i grew myself a little mullet because ive not been working in the pub and wanted solid snake hair, ive allowed myself to look at my face and the long hair around it and not despair because i know that longer hair doesn't make me a woman, but the moment you go into a shop, or get takeaway or pass by people in the street its all "move out the way of this lady!" and "thank you, ma'am"

i dont want the gender option of 'other' on my ID i want to know 1 good reason why gender should be listed on an ID in the 1st place

ive just come back from the range and i had my hair up like some e-thot fuckboy, i had to go BACK to the range because they got my click and collect order wrong so ive got two members of staff looking over my order, im dressed in black jeans and a black masc-looking ripped shirt, mask covering half my face and as the manager's showing the kid who served me the receipt they go "oh I served that guy earlier" and the manager corrects them "its a lady". I say "im niether" and they both just stare at me like im a toddler. Im already panicking because the air feels the same way it did when some cunt came after me in the pub toliets. "dont worry about it :)" i say, they both turn back to the tills and completely ignore me.

Anyway, micro-aggressions, ive experienced a lot of them for many reasons over the course of my life and today ive decided to snap.

Not at the people in the range like, just in general.

I will never pass. That's just an element of trans euphoria i will never get to experience. Not right off the bat, anyway. Not where i live, and most likely not in my lifetime. Maybe for kids in LA or Brighton, and hey power to you guys man im happy for you, but people assume or guess m/f when they look at me and they will never get it right.

So when i see people on this site try and twitter etc rank "who's the most oppressed"™️ like a godamn smash bros tier list it blows my mind because of all the things you could spend your days doing thats what youre expending energy on?!

You could be the exact same age, race, sex, gender, sexuality, you could have the exact same disabilities, mental health conditions and money in your bank as another person on this site and you'd still never understand what they've been through. Our experiences, our families, our morals and lives are always gonna be different and the moment you try to write definitive rules on whose got it worse you've already lost and you're already wrong. Oppressed classes are not a fucking hivemind and pretending they are is only going to cause you more problems. I get the strong sense that some of you looked at the word intersectionality, went "ah yeah, i know what that means" having never read up on the matter, then proceeded to play the pain olympics.

And its creating a culture where kids feel the need to spills their souls online to justify living their lives!

You've not listed your disabilites in your bio so you're able-bodied. You're Irish but haven't listed your race so you're white. You're cis man so you've never played with gender and suffered as a result. You're asexual so clearly you're a cringeworthy baby who's never experienced a wrong-doing in their life.

The reverse is true too, if you list every aspect of yourself then you're automatically honest. The more opressed you are the less likely you are of causing harm to others. Psht, don't have a carrd in this day and age? What are you, a fraud? cishet white man playing make believe? Post a selfie or face the wrath of ozymandaus. What's privacy? It takes me 3 minutes to read the bio on this discourse side-blog so clearly they're an angel.

my mam abused me for years, she did the same to my brother when i left home at 18 and my dad drank himself to death. My nan, his mother, never believed me because my mam's a disabled woman with a lot of trauma, and at 14 how do you explain to the woman who takes you to the beach that it's WORSE because as she's beckoning you to the side of her bed so she can scream point blank in your face, or hit you, you're never truely sure, you're thinking about running away because of course she physically can't chase you but she can throw. And then where would you go if you did buggar off?

"You have to sleep sometimes" she used to say to me when I'd piss her off. Other days she told me horror stories about kids in care, and disabled people having their kids taken away, made me promise that I'd always love her and always be her baby, and I'd do that for her because she's my mam, she'd be satisfied then ignore me for a while. I grew up thinking that was entirely normal until i'd tell funny family stories at school and nobody would laugh. The closest I got to truely running away was when I changed my name and pronouns and her rejection, turned to vitriol one night and I so, so, nearly held a knife to my throat and simply fell forwards in the uni showers. Obviously I didn't do that.

But she's had a shitter life than me thus far so she's in the right, as the online black/white dichotomy states. I keep her at arm's length but I'm unable to cut her away without losing the rest of my family because I dared defy the role of eldest child and care for her as I've done my whole life, as is expected.

we need to take things on a case by case basis, and learn when stuff is none of our business.

"Hey! :) I see you've reclaimed (X) slur, without submitting the proper paperwork. Real quick tell me every trauma you've ever experienced or I'll write a callout post :) delete this anonymous message (as is your right) and i'll assume you as sus ❤"

you can only call yourself a dyke if on your 13th birthday, the moon's tender rays struck you through your bedroom window and gave you your first wet dream about girls.

Great, cool. I have no interest in calling myself a dyke, i cant call myself a lesbian because it makes me dysphoric, thats why im queer, but i can assure you that when 3 kids from catholic school pinned me under the bridge and threatened to cut me open for being a "dirty dyke tramp" they didn't play 20Qs with me first to check that i was actually a lesbian.

if your first thought is "well thats just misdirected homophobia, so youre not ACTUALLY a victim" log the fuck off and consider what's wrong with you. Because all our oppressors care about is sniffing out the wrong on you and beating it out, they dont care what breed of wrong it is.

so you're going to spend your day, the enlightened adult that you are, frothing at the mouth because some 15yr old dared call themselves butch despite them being OnLY a BiSexUAl? You're gonna say that trans woman deserves to be suicidal because yes she may be trans BUT she's from the UK, so clearly she loves her horrid country and government. You're gonna say that black lad deserves racial abuse because he's trying to focus on his studies rather than go to protests. That 19yr old who's living in poverty deserves it because they work for Amazon. Texans deserve to freeze to death because there are republicans in Texas.

You're going to harass a complete stranger coming to terms with the parts of themselves society has taught them are worthless at best because they're not doing it the way YOU think is right.

This post has not ended where I started it but I really dont care:

Some of you are so fucking desperate to be the bullies you never got to be in secondary school and it shows. But you're cowards. You can't just admit you want to divide and concur so you do it in a new woke way and when your time on this earth is done, you'll have commited the same pain that's been dealt to you and wonder why you died miserable in a world thats more or less the same.

okay to reblog but dont @ me for a debate because i have, like, real problems and will just block you

#tw suicide mention #child abuse #homophobia #transphobia #ablesim #racism #*muffled screaming*#im shit at tagging sorry if i missed anything but im out i think

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ourimpavidheroine · 4 years

Video

youtube

The Fire Nation, anyone? Let’s check in with the Firelord herself.

Juziya

I created the character of Sozui for Fic Purposes and then realized I didn’t actually want him to be the Firelord. Therefore I needed an older sibling for him. I was toying with names and thinking about this character and she just appeared there, tall, implacable, powerful yet feminine. And then I realized she had an Adam’s apple and I was like...hey, I’ve got a transwoman here.

I didn’t actually tell my readers that for a long time; my mistake, absolutely. I thought I was doing the right thing by treating her like just another character but I was speaking to a trans student I have here and mentioned trans characters in fiction and long story short, he called me on my bullshit and set me straight. (Uh, so to speak.) I immediately wrote it in to the fic I was currently working on at the time. I’ve apologized for my ignorance before but let me do it again: to all of my trans readers, I was wrong to not identify Juziya as trans from the very beginning and I am truly sorry for any hurt I caused. It will not happen again.

What can I tell you about her? Juziya’s mother, Mizuko, is mentally ill; she was Izumi’s oldest daughter and should have been the Firelord but Izumi knows by the time she is in her teens that Mizuko may not be able to rule. Mizuko marries for love; she does not recover well from Juziya’s birth and Izumi moves the family to a royal estate out in the very well-guarded countryside of Capital Island. Juziya lives there with her parents - while her mother steadily gets worse - until she’s ten and she and her year old baby brother are moved to the Palace where she is trained to be the next Firelord. (To be clear, Juziya would have eventually been the Firelord anyhow, but she would have followed her mother rather than her grandmother.)

Juziya is sharply intelligent and carries a lot of responsibility on her shoulders. By the time she is crowned Firelord her nation is the largest in the world, with the strongest economy. It is also a conservative nation, with ancient traditions that are far more than just lip service.

Her education, although conducted privately, is extensive. Her grandmother starts to bring Juziya with her to court when Juziya turns thirteen. Izumi is very aware that Juziya will have to rule with an iron fist: for one thing, the Earth Kingdom has been dissolved, which means a huge change in terms of world politics and world economy. For another Zuko is gone and while his legacy carries on, there are noble families who either didn’t like how he did things or who hope to take advantage of this young, untested ruler. Juziya begins ruling in a world of great change, and it takes a strong monarch to navigate that in the best way for their nation. Juziya is raised to be that monarch and it will, for her entire life, be her only focus.

Juziya understands this and while she is a fair monarch, she does have the iron fist the Fire Nation needs during her particular range. She knows that she is doing what she is doing so that her eventual heir - Sozui’s child - will be able to be a different kind of Firelord. Sometimes she grieves who she must be, but never publicly.

She and Sozui are extremely close; he is the person in the world who matters the most to her (although she dotes on Lozan and behind closed doors will be a very loving Auntie Ziya). Under her grandmother’s advice, she chooses while Sozui is still underage not to marry or have heirs. She knows that the next Firelord being her niece/nephew will mean a fresh start for the Fire Nation, a chance for the people to love that Firelord without her legacy hanging over them. She is, in that, absolutely correct. That is exactly what happens.

She regrets deeply that she must force Sozui to provide her with an heir. She is very glad when the tension between herself and Naoki is resolved and Lozan is firmly secured as the next Firelord and her brother comes home. He is the only person she feels she can really trust, really rely on when it comes to anything personal.

Juziya has no time for romance and knows better than to risk it since she is clearly unattached. The Firelord does not need to be part of a scandal. She’s mostly not interested in all of that, either; it was not a huge loss for her to never marry or even seek discreet lovers. She does, however, harbor certain feelings for Qi, and always will. Juziya is so reserved, however, her walls so unapproachable, that the only person who will ever know is Sozui, who knows her the best. And he will most certainly never tell.

She is a very good Firelord. Sometimes, however, duty takes its toll.

I'll smile, I know what it takes to fool this town

I'll do it 'til the sun goes down And all through the night time, oh yeah, Oh, yeah, I'll tell you what you want to hear Keep my sunglasses on while I shed a tear It's never the right time, yeah, yeah I'll put my armor on, Show you how strong I am I'll put my armor on, I'll show you that I am I'm unstoppable I'm a Porsche with no brakes I'm invincible Yeah, I win every single game I'm so powerful I don't need batteries to play I'm so confident I'm unstoppable today Unstoppable today [3x] I'm unstoppable today I break down, only alone I will cry out loud You'll never see what's hiding out Hiding out deep down, yeah, yeah I know I've heard that to let your feelings show Is the only way to make friendships grow But I'm too afraid now, yeah, yeah I'll put my armor on, Show you how strong I am I'll put my armor on, I'll show you that I am I'm unstoppable I'm a Porsche with no brakes I'm invincible Yeah, I win every single game I'm so powerful I don't need batteries to play I'm so confident I'm unstoppable today Unstoppable today [3x] I'm unstoppable today Unstoppable today [3x] I'm unstoppable today I'll put my armor on, Show you how strong I am I'll put my armor on, I'll show you that I am I'm unstoppable I'm a Porsche with no brakes I'm invincible Yeah, I win every single game I'm so powerful I don't need batteries to play I'm so confident I'm unstoppable today Unstoppable today [3x]

#character soundtrack #Juziya

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starshineandbooks · 4 years

Text

Of ghosts and sons

Based almost entirley off of @lovelylogans‘s Gilmore girls AU - AO3 Tumblr

Read THIS on Ao3

Summary: Remus reflects back on his thoughts of his still living loved ones’ lives. Watching his teenager grow into a married man with a kid.

Also known as: An excuse to write soft dad! Remus and Son! Roman, and explore how a dead Remus feels about his son marrying an academically smart moron.

Word count: 2596

Pairing: Romantic Moxiety, Romantic Logince, familial lampr

Warnings: Dead character (Remus is a ghost kinda?), mild cursing, a few suggestive lines, Remus being Remus, weird food, sympathtic! Remus

Remus figured he achieved a pretty great death. Oh, sure, he misses things, but now he can float around behind people and be himself with free of judgement, which is, nice. Oddly nice. Don’t get him wrong, he’d had friends, ut, even Virgil and Isidora had been a little weirded out every once in a while.

And, he’s watched Virgil and Isidora, of course he did. They mattered to him.

Remus is proud of Virgil, finding a good guy, even if he wasn’t a guy Remus would have chosen, to settle down with. Virgil and Patton, Remus think they’re a good match. He’d have loved to make Patton squirm though. Nothing personal, he liked to make everyone squirm. It was fun!

Patton is also fairly interesting, at first Remus just watched him after earth because he was a scandal. Patton, trans, sixteen year old run away, with a baby. Pretty interesting.

Then, Remus got invested. Oops.

Patton was kind, and a good person. Remus could respect him. Remus isn't so sure that he and Patton would have been friends, but Remus had to admit, Patton was respectable.

Patton Sanders, the kid stood up for himself and his child. Patton befriended Virgil, which is hard enough, then made Virgil love him, which is even harder. Then Virgil fell for Patton romantically, which is a task to make happen.

Patton raised a smart, ambitious kid. Logan. Remus is fond of Logan, but don’t tell anyone. Of course, Logan is also basically Virgil’s kid, which basically makes Remus Logan’s roundabout uncle in a weird way.

Logan is smart, wickedly so in fact. The kid goes to Chilton, and is very ambitious. In a cutthroat manner almost. Yet, Logan is genuinely kind, and cares for Remus’ own child.

That’s another thing. Remus has a kid. A biological child he never met.

Isidora had been someone Remus genuinely loved. Not romantically, but he had loved her more than anything else, except maybe Virgil. But that was a different kind of love.

Isidora, the five foot two latina had been a spitfire of a dancer when Remus knew her. Not much had changed, except, she had Roman not long after Remus died.

And Virgil, bless the man, had fought to be in Roman’s life.

Roman was a lot like his mom, loyal, kind, courageous. Roman was taller than his mother, but just as graceful.

Roman, Remus’ baby, shut up that’s Remus’ baby. His spawn. He’s allowed to be a little sappy.

Roman had grown from an over excited six year old kissing his best-friend-and-first-crush’s skinned knee better into a kind, loyal, selfless teenager who’s a dancer just like his mother.

Remus isn’t stupid. Crazy, inconsiderate, and crass? Sure. But Remus is not and has never been stupid.

He knows that Roman probably is better off for not having him around.

Remus is loud, disruptive, rude, disgusting, and generally the opposite of what is ‘socially acceptable’. Remus even revels in this fact.

But, It’s not always an easy life to lead. And Remus does want Roman to have an easy life where he knows how good he is.

But, on the other hand, he watched Roman struggle with a dad sized cut out hole in his life.

Remus had become something of a myth in Sideshire. Remus, the horror story author recluse, Isidora Prince’s best friend, Roman’s dad, died in a mysterious car crash.

No one really tells Roman much about Remus. So, Roman had a bit of doubt, which is natural.

And Remus is so incredibly proud of Roman. For everything.

Roman had graduated highschool with a solid three point four grade point average. The kid had started college on time and was happy. Roman worked as a dance instructor in the town he attends college in, teaching kids to dance.

Roman ended up with a supportive boyfriend, Logan. And the two are a good couple, built off of friendship, love, trust, and respect. The stuff of fairytales, even if they do argue a little more than they’d admit.

Remus has learned he can in fact visit dreams, and talk to people that way, he’s had some conversations with Virgil and Isidora that way.

But, Remus thinks it might be time to visit his son. Especially since Virgil and Patton are finally engaged and Roman is thinking about proposing to Logan.

So, that’s how Remus finds himself sitting in Lucy’s diner opposite of his son and his son’s boyfriend. Apparently this is a shared dream between the couple. Works just as well, Remus supposes.

After all, Remus is fairly fond of Logan too.

“Excuse me,” Logan says looking up from his book and where his head had been resting on Roman’s shoulder, “Do we know you? You look very familiar, I regret to say I can not place you however.”

Remus grins wickedly, “You wouldn't I’m a ghost! My corpse is rotting six feet under you twerp!”

Roman looks up, startled, “D-dad?”

Logan tilts his head, “Oh, that makes more sense. Hello Remus. Virgil speaks fondly of you.”

“Dad,” Roman whispers again, grabbing Logan’s arm, “Logan, that’s my dad.”

“I know, I can see dear.” Logan says in an exasperated yet fond voice.

“Hello Roman, you really do have a lot of your mother in you. Izzydory, how is she?”

“Izzy- Mama’s okay, she- she misses you. I miss you- uh- Can I miss you? I never met you.”

“You can miss the idea of someone,” Logan chimes, “And you know very well what Virgil would say about dismissing feelings.”

“Yeah,” Roman nods, “I do.”

Remus hums, turning to Lucy when she comes to take his order, “Can I get a bacon shake with Sardines and coffee grounds?”

Lucy just nods and walks off.

“That’s-” Roman chokes, “That’s gross dad.”

Remus laughs delightedly, “That’s the point!”

“He does things for amusement, not because it is logical.”

“There’s no rhyme or reason to what I do kid, I just do a skiddly boo.” Remus smiles, “So, what’s life like for you in the Bronx kid?”

Roman just stares blankly at his father, “This can't be real, I’ve gotta be dreaming, Lo, darling, I’m dreaming right?”

Logan just sighs, “I had assumed I was, I don’t know Roman, one of us is for sure.”

“You both are, it’s a shared dream,” Remus nods sagely, “You guys could get up to some steamy things since you can share dreams-”

“And as Virgil would say, stop it, fam.” Logan drawls unsure, then signs, shaking his head, “Also, what in the world is that supposed to mean?”

“Oh, I just meant you two could use the dreams to have dream sex-”

“Please stop,” Logan groans, putting his face in his hands and making a distressed sound, “Why are you like this? That is your son.”

“I know!” Remus cheers, “So, Roman, any questions?”

Roman stares at Remus, “I- I had so many, but- I can’t remember them now.”

Logan turns and whispers something to Roman.

Roman nods, “That’s right, thanks specs!”

“What’s right kid?” Remus asks.

“Oh, I’ve just always wondered, am I- Am I doing the right thing? I mean, if you’re really Remus, you’ve not seen me my whole life, like, yeah i”m your kid but, I’m not raised by you. Did- Did I do okay? Have I made you proud at least?”

Logan looks rather upset from the question, Remus notes. If the dead man had to guess, he’d say it’s because Logan doesn't like that Roman doubts himself.

And Remus doesn't like it either.

No, he is not being sentimental, shut the hell your mouth.

Remus tilts his head, “I’ve been watching you Roman. You to Logan, but Ro, kid, mijo, you’ve done well.”

Roman’s face is almost comical to Remus, wide eyes, mouth quirked up, eyebrows drawn up. A twinge of relief in the breath Roman lets out. Remus thinks he looks like an overly excited puppy. But that’s Remus’ over excited puppy.

Logan smiles gently, hidden almost. Remus does think it’s interesting how similar Logan is to Virgil.

“Really?” Roman breathes out, sounding even more like an overly excited puppy.

“I very much doubt him to be lying Roman, your mother has never put up with liars before, I doubt she would have in the father of her child.” Logan says simply, well, simply for the eighteen year old genius.

“Really, kid. You graduated with a good GPA, you got out of Sideshire, you’re a dancer just like your mother, you’re brave, and just, and kind, but don’t tell anyone I said any of this sappyniess. And kid, Roman, you’re doing good.”

“Thank you,” Roman says softly.

“You should not thank him Ro,” Logan scoffs, “He said the truth, it’s not like he offered to walk you down the aisle at your wedding.”

“Our wedding,” Roman says quickly, “My wedding will be ours.”

Logan blinks, flushing steadily, “Uh-”

“Hopefully!” Roman chimes, “I mean to hopefully!”

“God you’re obnoxiously cute, you know that?” Remus rolls hie eyes, “I’m sure you’ll both be married forever to each other and have some sappy loving relationship.”

“Thanks? I think.” Logan sighs, shaking his head.

“Hey, dad?” Roman starts, “Uh, got any life advice?”

“Save time by putting toothpaste in your food, use bottle caps as orange holders, get a toilet seat and use it to put your plate on when you eat! And, don’t try to fight with Izzy unless whatever you're fighting about really matters, because she is a stubborn woman and you’ll be tired by the end of the argument, and probably have lost.”

“Uh-”

“The bit about your mom sounds accurate, but she’s nice and might listen?” Logan sighs, shaking his head.

“How do you use a toilet seat- never mind I don’t want to know.”

Lucy comes back, setting Remus’ abomination of a milk shake down.

Remus thanks her, turning his head to look at Roman.

“God, you really got your mama’s pretty, you know that? I mean, you look like me some, but god.”

“I- You thought mama was pretty?” Roman blinks, “I’d always thought you were gay, they always said-”

“Kid, I’m gay, not blind.” Remus chuckles, “But yeah, your mom’s pretty kid.”

“Yeah,” Roman sighs, she is.”

“You’re about to wake up because of an alarm you set because you, my friend, have an early shift today. I’m proud of you kid, you’re doing good. I’ll talk to you again, later. Okay?”

“Dad?” Roman blinks, “Are you really here?”

“I’m dead, but yeah, I’m here.”

“Thanks dad.”

“I love you kid,” Remus sighs, “Good luck on your test tomorrow!”

Roman blinks startled but fades from the dream, leaving just Logan.

Logan looks at Remus and snorts darkly, “This isn't at all awkward, you know, my boyfriend’s dead dad in Lucy’s diner. Not to mention that you’re Virgil’s best friend.”

“Yeah, probably word that I’m your uncle and your boyfriend’s dad,” Remus snorts, “But I like weird.”

“Uh, uncle?!”

“Yeah, you’re basically Virgil’s kid, meaning that since I’m basically his brother, that I’m basically your uncle!” Remus cackles, “I thought you were the smart one!”

“It depends on the kind of intelligence,” Logan sighs, “I’ll admit I lack some of the more, say, social knowledge. But, I have dad and Roman at least.”

“Yeah, well, you're a good kid to Logan.”

“Thanks.”

“Be good to my baby Logan,” Remus says darkly, “Be good to my baby or I’ll figure out how to ruin your entire life.”

Logan looks up to Remus, “If I were to be bad to Roman, I’d have ruined my life myself. Because, he is my everything, as stupid and sappy as that sounds.”

Remus nods, “Good. You’ll make it through you know you two will make it out together.”

“Good.” Logan hums, tilting his head, “You're an asshole though. You really hurt a lot of the people we both care for.”

“Ballsy,” Remus smirks, “Calling the dead father of your boyfriend that. I knew I liked you!”

“Very few people seem to,” Logan shrugs, “But the whole dying and destroying Ms. Prince and Virgil and leaving Roman to be in the dark is really my only complaint against you.”

“Y’know, I did regret not being able to be there for them, but Roman especially. He’s my baby Logan, I know you don’t have kids, but, there’s just something about them.”

“So I’ve been told.”

“Yeah, well, I should go.”

“Probably so. And Remus?”

“Yeah?”

“If you really can talk to people through dreams, don’t leave Roman alone, he’d like you to talk to him. And, maybe talk to Virgil and Ms.Prince some too.”

“Of course. Later dork. Dork means- You’re gone.”

Remus shakes his head as the dream dissolves around him, a bitter laugh leaving him.

Remus made sure to speak to his loved ones every so often, the first time he visited Isidora after Logan had told him too it had been ten years and she had cried a little when she woke up.

Virgil had insulted Remus the whole dream that Remus had visited the emo music loving man.

Remus watches Virgil and Patton’s wedding, glad to watch the entire thing and see his best friend happy. Remus notices that Roman is the best man for Virgil, but only because Logan was Patton’s best man. The younger couple gave a nice speech that called attention to the fact that this wedding has been a long time in the works.

Virgil and Patton’s first dance is sweet and too sappy for Remus’ taste but okay.

Remus nearly screams when Roman and Logan get engaged, because, like the dorks they are, they propose at the same time.

Logan and Roman got reneged on their fifth anniversary, in the gazebo, under the stars. Remus had proposed first, because this was his plan. But Roman pulled out his own ring and asked Logan.

Because the two are entirely too cute.

Remus gloated to them next time he spoke to them both, he called it after all.

Roman and Logan’s wedding is a year and a half later, over the summer between their junior and senior years in college.

It’s a bigger affair than Virgil and Patton’s had been, but not the largest wedding.

The whole town came, along with Logan’s grandparents, and a few friends from the boys’ own colleges.

Roman and Logan had stared at each other sappily the whole vow giving, making stupid cow eyes.

But, Remus creamed the loudest cheer out of anyone at that wedding when the two kissed and sealed the deal. He caught Isidora and Virgil looking around, then sharing a glance and a bitter laugh, a mutter of Remus’ name.

Roman and Logan’s first dance, per Roman’s selection, was a stupidly sappy song, for a pair of stupidly sappy new husbands. Husbands, God, Roman was married now. To his highschool sweetheart no less, his small town highschool sweetheart.

Remus would say something arguably rude about the whole sappy ordeal, if it wasn’t Roman’s wedding.

A few years down the line, after Logan and Roman graduate, they buy a house in Sideshire, adopting a kid. And oh, Remus has a grandchild now.

Virgil and Patton went to family dinners on Fridays with Emilie and Richard Sanders, Logan and Roman going as well. And somehow, Remus is glad that his saps have each other.

As much as Remus misses his friends and his family, as much as he wishes he could be there for them in the flesh, he’s proud of them no matter what. Even if they are stupidly sappy.

But, Remus looks forward to reuniting with Isidora and Virgil, and officially meeting the rest. One day, but hopefully, not soon.

#WYLIWF verse #logince #moxiety #platonic lamp #Sympathetic! Remus #Patton Sanders #Logan Sanders #Virgil Sanders #Roman Sanders #sanders sides #Ghost! Remus Sanders

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