#'but this will decide your career!' why don't you go to hell and maybe you'll calm down

[an-absolute-nightmare]

so much for thinking i beat exam anxiety

[k-dokja]

synopsis: gojo saw how you coped after all of that and decided he didn't like it.

timeline: fourth year? it's after gojo's past arc.

characters feature: gojo satoru.

relationship: friends. they care about each other and there's a tiny hint of romance, but both of their traumatized asses won't cross the line.

notes: ooc as hell since i'm trying to narrow him down.

You wonder at which point old friends become strangers, because when Satoru called you earlier this morning, you'd forgotten there is more to life than your career. He wanted to meet. It'd been months since the two of you talked.

He thought you were avoiding him. You said nothing about the matter. Whether that was true or not, there was no denying the wall between the two of you after what happened with Suguru. You weren't about to address it because you hoped it'd fall into obscurity.

Satoru doesn't give you the chance to see that happening.

So there you are, sitting across from him in a coffee shop. Satoru is in his usual uniform but you are in your casual clothes. He has come over straight after his mission. It's almost funny to think about how he is the one busier than you but he's also extending the effort to reach out.

Neither of you talks in the first minute, but you feel the curious looks and hear the whispers from around you. The two of you together always attract the attention of those nearby, you'd blame it on appearance but Satoru always draws in the curiosity of others with his magnetism.

In a way, you resent him for that. There's no anonymity when you're around him.

And it helps little when every muscle of your body is tense but Satoru is completely at ease. He sits back, easygoing and casual, but you're fiddling with the fabric of your pants under the table. You don't know how he does this, not when he should be the one in far more pain than any of you.

"I called Shoko but she was caught up with work," he takes the first steps with a light shrug, "maybe we can stop by her office later to bother her."

"Mhm."

"Oh, have you checked out that new album by—"

Satoru talks and it's all inconsequential. Your noncommittal hums are all that you contributed to the conversation because your mind is everywhere and nowhere all at once. At some point, he leans towards on the table and props his chin on the palm of his hand.

You should've focused then because the shift in his tone when he says your name is a violent shove.

"...Hm?"

"You aren't listening to me at all~" He plops down on the table, the image of petulance when he gazes up at you, but the severity of his eyes is sincere. "If I wanted to talk to a wall, I'd have called up Nanami."

You feel it. The warmth of his hand on yours. On the surface, nothing contacts either of you, but underneath the table, Satoru's fingers thread with yours. It's a reassurance and a restraint. He's here for you, but he's not letting you run away from this conversation either.

It's uncharacteristic, yet why wouldn't he worry?

It was both of your negligence to a friend that led you to this place. Satoru's only trying to prevent it from happening again the second time.

"Ha..." You can't help the laughter from bubbling out of your chest. The situation is too absurd for you to do otherwise. "Sorry, I..." You don't know what you'll say, you haven't thought about it.

You should apologize for avoiding him, it's a deliberate move.

You should apologize for worrying him, it should've been avoidable.

You should apologize for not being there for him, it's not only you who are in pain.

In the end, there is only one right answer to this. "...I'm here now," you say, forcing a smile, "I'm not going anywhere, you won't get rid of me that easily."

Satoru smiles and it's surprisingly pure. He talks again and it's all inconsequential, but this time you listen and make him smile again when you speak. Both of you feel the distinct absence of your mutual friend but neither of you comment on it because you'll have to get used to this new reality without him.

At least, Satoru's hand never leaves yours all the while.

[dng3r]

don't you know it's fun for me to be bad?

【 mackenyu //. cisman //. he/him 】 𝐍𝐨𝐰 𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠… HIKARI TERADA  into The Hub. You are registered to be TWENTY EIGHT YEARS OLD and have been given citizenship for A LIFETIME under the Expatriate Act. According to the data compiled, your most notable qualities seem to be HUMOROUS & THOUGHTLESS. Please confirm that you are LAWFUL EVIL. From what we’ve gathered your place of employ is currently for the ICHIBANGASE / EISHER CORPORATION as a SAMURAI-VI SUBJECT I.D. #9644 ( SOLDIER 1ST CLASS CODENAME: ARES ) //. LEVEL FOUR GYM as a UNDEGROUND FIGHTER //. COWBOYS as a BOUNTY HUNTER. We strongly advise that you provide the correct information pertaining to your background to ensure proper safety precautions: are you a _HOST_ or _HUMAN_? A deeper dive into our archive suggests that you are LAUGHING AT THE THREAT OF DANGER, FORGOTTEN THEIR HUMANITY, CAUSING MAYHEM FOR THE SAKE OF MAYHEM, SMILING AT THE SIGHT OF BLOOD. Though we noticed you, too, are similar to WOLVERINE ( X-MEN ), DEADPOOL ( MARVEL ), SYLAR ( HEROES ), HARLEY QUINN ( DC ). ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ ᴠᴇʀɪғɪᴄᴀᴛɪᴏɴ 100% ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ! Please comply to all regulations and laws. It is our hope that you enjoy your stay.

general information

name: hikari terada

nickname/codename: ares

age: twenty-eight

face claim: mackenyu

gender & pronouns: cisman & he/him

orientation: bisexual/biromantic

relationship status: REDACTED

physical & mental

hair color: depends on what he feels like

eye color: hazel

height: 178 cm/5'10ft

tattoos: two sleeve tattoos

scars: too many to count.

biography

do you remember who you were beforehand? no, and quite frankly you never gave it much thought. you've always been this, a soldier, a hunter, a killer. if you were forced to you'd recall then you were an orphan who was taken to be trained and become who you are today; it's as simple and as boring as that. well, you can also add the excruciating pain you went through to get to that position but who cares about that, right?

besides, it's far more interesting to talk about your career as a soldier and how you got a little too into the role. there's something addictive about power or maybe you're just insane as many people have decided to call you. you don't see yourself like that, why can't a guy just make his job fun? and if said job involves killing and arresting people than that's just your business, isn't it?

you like working alone, nobody to tell you what to do in the middle of the job. all you need is for the corpo to point and you shoot, the means are irrelevant. maybe this is why your codename is ares, you're good at starting a war because why go into a stealth mission quietly when you can go in guns and swords blazing?

despite the road that lead you to where you are, you love your job. an excuse to fight in the most legal of senses. you do sometimes wonder if the corpo never have found you when you were an orphan, would you still be laughing during a fight? would you still make your enemies think they had a chance just for fun, to prolong a fight that in your mind was over the minute you step foot there? nah, it's a waste of thought, anyway.

when you don't have any missions, however, you often find other ways to scratch the itch; by underground fighting or even taking some bounties. you live your life to cause mayhem because why not? you've already been told you're going to hell and your reply is that you'll greet satan with a bullet to the heart. either that or sleep with him, either way works.

wanted connections.

just as crazy as me — this is probably hikari's other half. maybe it started as hikari being a bad influence that eventually it bled into them being bad too? it could also be someone that's already bad and they can be evil together. idk i need to flesh out this idea more.

co-worker — this could be anybody in the corpo world who thinks hikari is a little bit out of control, the two of them basically don't like each other though hikari shows it by annoying the ever living crap outta them.

target — this is just hikari's target. maybe he nearly killed them and didn't for w/e reason? def something we can talk about !

i know you — this someone is childhood friend, who was also an orphan. they knew hikari before he was taken. maybe this character has been wondering for years and years what happened to hikari before suddenly seeing him as a soldier.

any and all connections !!

[hazyilluminations]

My spot. Your spot. Our spot…

It is nice to have someone to support you, isn't it?

Sometimes the closest ones don't provide even the smallest amount of that. They don't accept you as a standalone human being, don't even try to do it, and keep pushing you with their own aspirations and goals.

It gets you in a cage of suppressed emotions.

At some point, you just lose the will to defend your own way in life.

Does it have to be that way? Why can't people just accept you for who you are and let you have your wings.

Even if you fail, it will be your path.

"You need to stop fooling around with your art stuff. After graduation, you'll join me and make yourself a career", your father just wouldn't stop picturing your future for you.

"Do I have a vote in this?", you smiled a little.

It is not like your father was a tyrant, you meant a world to him. You had everything, but not your future. He just didn't consider your aspirations.

"This is your future we are talking about, Y/N. You should thank me for being so interested in it. I love you and wish only the best for you".

"Yes, sure, Dad. Thank you. I need to go. I don't want to be late on the first day in a new school… in the middle of the year", you kissed your Dad on the temple, grabbed your school backpack and went out of the cage.

It was a bit chilly outside, but it is exactly what you needed – fresh, cool air. You took a deep breath and put on headphones.

Play…

Intoxicating vibes filled your mind and put your soul at ease. Maybe just for a bit, but it worked for you.

You walked past small colorful shrines with little fox statues and tried to imprint little details, so that you could draw it later as a sketch or even with watercolors. Perhaps you'll even make a foxy themed bullet journal.

Oh, it would look so cute…

You didn't notice that you've already reached your destination - Inarizaki High School.

As you were about to go straight to the lockers, you felt a strong push from behind.

"Samu, you jerk! What the hell?", bleached boy didn't even try to look sorry.

"Hey, are you alright? Sorry, I didn't notice you. It is just my stupid brother and his morning antics. Are you new? I didn't see you before", grey haired boy, approached you with curiosity.

"Yeah, I am fine. Moved a week ago. I am sorry, I need to go, need to find my classroom", you bowed and turned around.

"Hey, wait. What class are you in? I can show you the way".

"What? You? The way? Samu, don't be stupid. If you need a guide, I am your guy. Atsumu Miya at your service", he winked and held out his hand.

"Cut it, Sumu. He is an idiot. Don't mind him".

And just like that, they started bickering. It would probably entertain you a bit, but you decided not to waste any time.

"I am fine. Thanks", you walked away from the loud twins.

You found your classroom without any further problems and stopped for a moment in front of the door.

You've got this. It is just a new school, new people …

You were lucky, the bell rang, and the teacher welcomed you. You made a quick routine self introduction and took a place at the back of the class, near the window. Perfect.

Time passed by and it was already lunch pause. Mmm, the most delicious time of the day with its long peaceful break for all the students.

It had always been the most special time for you, as you found the best hidden spot on the rooftop at your previous school, to escape from everyone and everything, and spend the time in your own universe … doodling, sketching.

That was your quest for the break in this new school – to find the perfect deserted place on the roof and claim it as yours. Little did you know, the perfect places don't stay deserted for long.

You sneaked out of the classroom before anyone jumped on you with questions for newcomers. There will be time for that, you thought.

Five minutes later, you found it – your desolate paradise – the sun peeking from the corner, to keep you warm on a chilly day, zero noisy pipes to distract you and take you out of the mood. Ideal.

You didn't want to waste any time. You leaned against the wall and took your sketchbook out. And just when you wanted to turn on the music, you heard a quiet, yet annoyed voice.

"This is my spot".

You blinked twice, then looked at the source of the voice. Dark brown weirdly combed down hair, with few strands at the top and middle-parted bangs. Foxy grayish-yellow eyes piercing through with a blank expression.

"Excuse me?".

"This.is.my.spot", he repeated, bending slightly down.

"Ok, Doctor Cooper. What do you want me to do about it?".

"Suna. And this sitcom is so outdated".

"True. It has its charm, though", you pretended not to understand his hints.

"So?", he quirked his brows.

"What? If you expect me to leave, then you are sooo wrong".

"You are, supposedly, a newcomer so, technically, you have no right to claim this spot, for, at least, a couple of weeks".

"And you are a local roof Sheriff now? I am teeeeeeerribly sorry, Mr. Myspot, for not being sorry".

"You are a stubborn one, aren't you? Don't want to leave, then move".

You frowned, but moved a bit, just not to spend the whole break debating. You held your hands in order to accommodate yourself, when he plopped down on your legs.

"What the?".

"It is your entrance fee to the club".

"Who said that I want to join?".

"You".

"When, smartass?".

"Oh. You hurt me right here in my meow meow", he grinned with closed eyes.

It was a stupid meme, but you cracked. It didn't go unnoticed.

"Hm. You can smile. Ouch. What was that for?".

You slightly pinched him by the cheek.

"Didn't know artists could be that tough", he teased.

"What made you think I am an artist?".

"Come on. I saw your sketches… they are pretty cool".

"Yeah, I know", you sounded smug.

"Oh. Wow. Self-esteem".

"What's the point to do art, if you don't cherish it. This is the way".

"You are such a nerd. I wanna see more".

"What? My works or Mandalorian?", this time you teased him.

"Don't be ridiculous. Of course, Mandalorian".

"Oh, look who is a nerd now", you giggled.

Somehow, this strange encounter made you feel warm and serene.

"Here", you held out your sketchbook to him.

"Hm? Really? I can?", he was a bit confused.

You nodded and kept your eyes at the clear blue sky.

He turned gently the pages over, examining each one in details. You found yourself being captivated by the sight of his fingers, turning the pages. Then you looked up at his face. You found him appealing.

You felt the urge to dry his portrait. Not being able to do it at that moment, you bit your lower lip.

"Cute", he side-eyed you with a small smile.

"What? The little corgi? Yeah, he surely is".

"Oh, you wanna play dummy? I can do that", he laughed.

"Can I draw you?", you blurted out, looking him straight in the eyes.

"Yeah, sure, I guess. I have one condition, though".

"I am listening".

"Don't get involved with the twins".

"Twins? Ah, Miya. What? Why so sudden? I hardly know anyone here. By the way, Osamu looked normal, I guess. They seemed a bit loud, though".

"You know me now. I saw you bumping with Atsumu in the morning. And their antics will get you into trouble", he mumbled, frowning a bit.

"If I went completely insane, I would think that you like me", you felt so confident, but regretted it instantly.

"Would it be so bad if I do?".

"No. Wouldn't it be too fast?", now you were blushing. You didn't expect him to be so bold and confident. You did share the feeling.

"Maybe it is that thing with the first sight", he put your sketchbook to the side and laid his head onto your knees. "Do you want some Chuupet?".

"I'd prefer something more nutritious".

"There is a café near, they make nice sandwiches and muffins".

"I have no choice but to come by then".

"Fine. Tomorrow. At 5. After school. You can draw. It is pretty quiet there".

"How can I say no now", you smiled at the thought of going on a date with him. "Look at me, first day at school and made a friend, that takes me out to eat something delicious", still, you didn't want to overthink the situation.

"What?!", he sounded annoyed, – "I don't want to be friends with you".

"You barely know me, you don't even know my name".

"Y/N. Class 4. Dorky. With old-fashioned movie taste. Amazing artist. You should probably make a living out of this", he paused, – "Rintarou".

Your face flushed, whether from the fact, that he knew your name, or from the fact, that he pointed out something you strived for. How in the world did he manage to know your name? It has passed only a half of the day.

"Are you a stalker or something?".

"Dummy", he gave a slight flick on your nose. — "Your sketchbook. It has your info paper".

Right… It surely had it …

"So… Rin. How are we going to share your spot. I am willing to claim it to myself", you were proud to mock him a little.

"Hmm. My spot. Your spot… Our spot. This is the way", he retorted, and your smile became laughter.

"You.are.a.dork, Suna Rintarou".

"I should go check it up then. What if it is contagious?".

Just like that, you found someone who saw you for who you were.

Someone to share your thoughts with. To crack silly jokes with.

And don't pretend.

It's something, that everyone need in their life, even if it won't last.

[missxfaithc]

I decided to put an excerpt from an old Markiplier fanfic of mine through Google Translate several times. Here’s what it came up with…

“Don't dare,” Mark said defensively at the computer screen.

“Or what?” Donker eyed the YouTuber warily. “There's nothing you can do to stop it. Me, so don't do that."

Dark smiled at Mark and the lights went out. Before Mark could do anything, a demon appeared and stabbed him with something.

“What the hell…” Mark staggered backwards. "What have you done for me?"

Mark felt... strange. His whole body suddenly caught fire. Like he was burning from the inside out.

Dark laughed next to Mark's computer. He had to be stopped before he could go any further. Mark walks into his recording studio as heat builds in his system. Was that how Darko killed him?

"I wouldn't do it if it was you," he warned as the student cast his demons under the dim light reflected on the computer screen.

“You know, the more you fight this poison, the faster it goes. Married? I will fight, won't you."

I wasn't strong then. But now...now I'm not strong.

Marcus asked what to do. Not on deck. But what will you do if you don't want to use it?

“Why did you do this?" asked.

The poison seemed to slow him down...or was the body dead?

Mørk gave the YouTuber an almost questioning look.

“Say what, Markiplier," he said as if it were an insult. "If you give me what I want and I can't help it, I'll think you're safe."

“Damn, you do. I'll take my chances with poison. Now tell me what you're doing."

Dark shook his head angrily, "You really don't understand? It's me giving the orders now, not you."

He approached Marcus, their faces almost touching. "You're useless," he said, grabbing Marcus by the collar and saying, "Nothing."

A dark sign was standing against the moss covered wall in the room. A YouTuber was once grateful for a pillow between the wall and his body.

“Now you can stay here and be good, or I will make your death much quicker."

Marcus closed his mouth, but said nothing more. While he wanted to destroy the demon at once, he knew well enough that he did not know if he could win by any means. Marcus hoped that he would live long enough to be explored.

Dark Mark eventually ran away and returned to the YouTuber's computer. "We," he said, "evil devil. "Some time ago I was in one of your videos. I think the times are changing, don't you think?”

Darken turned and tried to gauge Mark's reaction.

Mark didn't let on how terrifying the demon was. “Come on, I don't think I can stop you.”

Darhk smiled, “Finally! I didn't think you'd admit it. Maybe you're not as helpful as I first thought.”

Marcus does not want to accept meat. We'll have to wait and see what the Dark One is up to.

The demon stared at the computer screen, playing with something Mark couldn't see from where he was standing.

After a few minutes, Dark seemed to have everything ready for the live broadcast. Mark swallowed, heart pounding - and not with poison. He knew what was going on Dark.

"Dark..." Mark said, the hysteria fading into his usual calm tone. "What are you doing?"

The demon laughed at him, "What am I doing here? I want to talk to your fans!"

“Actually... you don't," Mark tried to reason with him.

“Oh, is anyone afraid that a big bad demon will ruin their career?" dark smile.

He smiled. "Don't worry. Markimoo, don't hurt your dear fans…”

Marcus watches, clenching his hands into fists. "Don't you dare bring my subscribers here. Do what you want, but don't you dare bring them here.”

Tumma sighed, not impressed at all. "I'm really, really confused Marcus. Yumma I thought you were... interesting. I can't help but wonder though. You're a star, aren't you?"

“It has nothing to do with the hero!" Marcus shouted desperately trying to stay calm. “What do you think of my fans? Why are they becoming your font?"

Dark pressed the button to start the live stream and then smiled "Hmm. That's it, right? I guess you'll have to wait and find out for yourself.”

Mark watched in horror as the demon began to speak to his worshippers. He felt the audience noticed something wrong when the fans didn't. He couldn't hear everything Darkness said as he spoke quietly, but there seemed to be a lot of thought put into the conversation.

Most Marks couldn't read the stuff because it sounded too loud, but I caught a few people who seemed to wonder if it was some sort of game or not.

If only people knew it was true.

“Then I need your help!" The darkness spoke loud enough for Mark to hear clearly.

[theskyexists]

Sad that theyre now milking the premise: ana is too competitive and literally an idiot for it

Also somehow the dude who doesn't know anything about babies and left the woman he promised to be with forever when an abortion was no longer an option gets to....? Be in the right? 'He's her dad! He gets to do whatever with her!' uh ......... No? He only got to see her bc Mariana wanted the best for Regina and hes so incredibly fucking dumb

It's getting old that Ana is always fucking wrong. Doesn't anybody else get to be wrong sometimes

And now it turns out that Mariana's dad was actually perfectly fine or something it was her mum who decided to keep him out or whatever

Come on....

Are we going to make the endless point that having a career as a woman and also having fun and having a husband and family is simply completely impossible. Jezus Christ.

I thought this was gonna be a pretty feminist show with interesting choices so far but now im like.... Come on

This is getting in the area of: this is too embarrassing.

God. The woman in a man's world shit. I've never seen Ana be actually good at her job. Can we please have Ana do some actual work.

Has anybody looked at that baby in the past hour.

Mariana had the cutest girlfriend who was willing to go all out who supported her when she was pregnant and giving birth and etc etc. and told her she's not alone yet she didn't want to call her a girlfriend. Elena get the HELL OUT LOLOLOL

So you hooked up with your best friend??? And then you were like: eh let's just be friends? Mariana what the FUCK. And then comes crying back for her friend. Ok well. Maybe just, don't date your lesbian friend and be completely unserious maybe.

'i came to realise he'd a good dad' IS HE THOUGH????? IS HE??? COS HE GAVE UP THE WIN ONCE? just because his intentions are good don't make him a good dad.

Huh??? So Ana just took the loss???? Shes not upset about missing the presentation????

Why the fuck didn't Mariana take him to task for breaking his fucking promise again. God he's so fucking dumb. I have no patience for that shit. He broke trust at least four times and horrifically. And yet you'll let him take your kid with him??? Come ON

All I want from this goddamn show is for them to show me Ana beating the fucking competition

Ana's work continues to be: standing around a room looking devastatingly attractive

I don't care about Pablo I don't care about Elena or ceci or the babies ALL I CARE ABOUT IS ANA WINNING. I care a little bit about Tere and Juan Carlos

He shouldn't care if she's just a throwaway woman. Or maybe he cares because it was fucking shitty

Ok so Ana just WON. THANK GOD.

Het ex gf is the front woman of a band???? Jezus Christ Mariana what are you DOING

Oh my god. The sexism at the table is insane. Oh my god. FUCK YEAH somehow it's like Ana won anyway

And fuck yeah! Somebody finally fucking told Mariana that wasn't cool. Girl didn't have to be so mean about it though I guess

Seriously, spying on the girls? Mariana come on....I mean I thought she might play it off as dropping her thing or whatever.

Oh ok. I wouldn't go so far as to equate being called a fake lesbian the same as sitting at a table full of sexist fucking colleagues

Well it's good Mariana got a wake-up call that she needed to be a littleeeee kinder to Elena

It's crazy that she's only 22

They're definitely hiding how ana and Mariana are growing closer and closer very naturally

Ana winning at work!!! Politics!!!!

How in the hell is Ana's mother like ten years older than her at most

If I didn't know that Ana and Mariana end up in a relationship somehow in some way for some time I don't think... I would even catch it? No I would. I mean the salsa dancing is really a step too far. No wait, it isnt. It REMAINS SO SUBTLE. that ana will take instruction from Mariana and NO ONE ELSE. BUT subtle bc no camera angles no nothing that suggest anything. And the narrative is so sincere in cheering on Juan Carlos and Ana

Ana....why r u an idiot

He's like: I love you! And she's like: I've moved on. She should maybe repeat that and say: you LEFT ME PREGNANT AFTER SAYING YOU WANTED TO BE TOGETHER FOREVER.

Ok Mariana is such a fucking idiot. What the fuckkkkk. Poor Pablo oh my GOD. WHAT!!!

Rodrigo said: hey I'll do your homework but you better be my girlfriend. And Paloma did that. What is this weird prostitution plot for grade schoolers

Why does Pablo suddenly have a brain and Mariana doesnt

These people are so unbelievably rich

Damn. Endlessly men misinterpreting shit again and again. Though Mariana and Teresa both have a problem with mixed signals for sure. The men sure like to go from: oh she put a hand on my leg - she must want sex!! despite clear verbal and sometimes years-long rejection or a context of formality.

I guess Juan Carlos and Ana simply want different things.

Elena, despite being thin as a rack, is really hot.

Teresa is such a fucking dick. Truly Mariana and Teresa are Soooooooo Selfish when it comes to people who like them. Oh i need you to do something so fuck your feelings!

Mariana trusting Ana almost without question. They're building this soooooo slow

WHY WOULD YOU SAY 'TERESA NO ONE MUST FIND OUT THAT WE WERE LOVERS' OUT LOUD WITH PEOPLE IN THE HOUSE!!!!

She's literally in the hallway!!!! Sjisodjdkjfkdnd

Jezus everybody doing so much adultery. This show basically normalises it as idk very natural. This sentiment is then verbally proposed.

Ana INSTANTLY tells Mariana that she cheated on her husband. The moment she sees her..dude....

Why would she do this thing with Anuar some more if Mariana already knows

Anyway somehow Pablo was super dumb in the beginning but later hes smart

Oh so they put in an 'i love you' and a kiss and INSTANTLY play it off for the character and the audience. AMAZING. AMAZING!!! I LOVE IT

Fucking sucks that i dont even ship the poly bait of Elena/Mariana/Pablo..because Mariana so clearly is not into them??

Juan Carlos blaming the break on Ana sleeping with someone else when she had the guts to tell him when he didnt is fucked.

Pablo proposes out of the blue. Gets rejected. Just leaves the babies. Losldbfldbfjf..i thought you were doing these things for the BABIES

Ah they're doing some sort of vows in the guise of a maternity ritual. Amazing

They keep putting in a shot to Elena when they have these moments. Like the resident lesbian going: Harold.....

AND NOW MARIANA ACTUALLY LOOKS AT ELENA WHOS LIKE LOL BITCH COME ON

oh no.... Seriously. Did she just pull the 'youre just confused' card on a fellow sapphic??? Or is she trying to protect her?

Pablo is such a selfish bitch. 'ive been trying so hard for something that I threw away like it was shit once already!!' somebody warn Cynthia about this man

Ok so now Ana is being a shit head and not mentioning she also cheated hello

I mean Mariana you've been such a piece of shit to your mother the whole time

Seriously? Doesn't Juan Carlos think to fucking say: this was BEFORE. Jezus Christ. Now its getting stupid. I hate that shit

Seriously. So she's going to ask the question and then Mariana is going to answer without explainin that it was BEFORE

Shut UP

Seriously he didn't tell the kids the reality either? Think this is damn unfeminist for the dude to get blamed now for eveything. Come ON

Hate when seasons end on everything being shit

And I bet next season it all gets spun even more into shit. Hate that

God.

Ana really in one day, instead of making it a good day for her daughters, actually blamed her husband for everything, alienated the whole family, and her bestest friend as well.

What the FUCK

Anyway season 2 really sucks

[project-sour-grapes]

State of the Union

I have hit the same roadblocks repeatedly in my life for 29 years. Or 26, if we consider that the first 3 years of life are basically boilerplate.

After a childhood of being told I was special, or after my temperament demanded that I be treated as special, or some feedback loop of the two, I am accepting that I am not. I am not inherently special. At the very least, acting like I am has gotten me nowhere. I half-ass everything I do. I rest on my laurels. I wait for things to turn into emergencies before I take action. I sit and observe things, and--while there is a role for the philosopher-sitter-observer in life--this has prevented me from taking action and making things happen. Whenever I hit an obstacle, I give up. Or I think of changing course entirely. I could be sailing in the middle of the ocean and come across a log and say, "Shoot, I better turn around."

I started this blog as a goodbye to that sort of thinking. I started it as a way to catalog my journey away from that life. But I'm turning around and realizing I'm merely a foot further from shore than I was a year ago.

There's that Confucius saying about "going slow" vs "stopping" along your journey that any Tumblr veteran knows. But this trajectory is just not satisfactory. I am going so slow towards my goals that it's almost as bad as being stopped. Hell, it might be worse, because I can comfort myself with my millimeters of progress, and say, "Well, I'm moving," and then blame the microscopic magnitude of it on anything that feels comforting at the time. "That's just how the system works." Or, "I'm just being patient." Or, "Maybe this just isn't the right path for me."

And maybe this isn't the right path for me. But I'm not going to find that out by being mediocre. Or by working only one hour a day toward my goal.

I was talking to my mother a few weeks ago about why I can't finish anything I start, big or small. I told her that I wanted to leave healthcare already and that my patients were starting infuriate me. Then after the hour-long practical conversation about work-life balance and "pros and cons," which is all of the typical career advice that anybody ever gets, she just said frankly, "Whatever you're running from, once you realize it and are ready to stop running, you'll find your goal."

The things that came to mind when she said that include:

running from body dysphoria (since I'm a man born with female body parts)

running from my desire for but difficulty with building friendship and relationships

running from my gigantic ego, since I don't know what to do with it

As I'm writing this, I want to stop and change course real quick. What if what I'm running from is my huge ego? And my fear of it means it just comes out in unhealthy ways? My repeated career and relationship failures would show as much.

Old school psychology is kind of goofy, but I'm thinking of Freud's concept of sublimation, where anything that we bury just comes out in new, weird ways. And in Jungian psychology, the things we don't like about ourselves or that are the more animalistic parts of ourselves (our "shadow") will make themselves known one way or another. The most vital, carnal parts of the human psyche fester like a pressure cooker unless we let off steam in a healthy way. "What we resist persists" is a true statement even for the ego.

I can't resist my ego. I can only channel it. The human ego is a powerful force, and with that, there are only two things I can do with that energy:

use it to compress diamonds in my own life

use it to make coal to burn others

Looking at the track record of my life, I have gotten most off track after I have accidentally acquired a pile of coal and then decided to weaponize it. Perhaps this was because I felt entitled to diamonds instead, and lighting the coal was a "fuck you" to those I had held my hand out to.

I think my mother was right. I am running from something. (Maybe several things, but) The something is my ego.

I'm not going to bury it or accept being average (at least the kind where no progress is being made year-over-year) or Buddhism my way out of it. I am going to run with it.

"What is the best way to ride a horse? The direction in which it is running." -Somebody

There are a few analogies for embracing the ego that I want to mull over the next few weeks. The ego is:

like fire in that it can keep you warm and aid in survival or it can burn your house down

like nuclear power in that it is the most efficient form of energy known to man or it can poison entire cities if handled poorly

like a German Shepherd or Belgian Malinois; it can either sniff out the bombs and incapacitate the bad guys or it can rip up your entire living room and shit the bed

It's not the ego that is the problem. It's what you do with it. It's where you point it and why.

Anything powerful can be both protective and harmful. Who are you serving with your ego: yourself or your community? Ideally, it would be a mix of both. My problem has been lopsidedness and then victimhood and self-righteous indignation when nobody even asked for my lopsideness to start.

With all of that being said, a few things are true:

I am not special and the world owes me nothing.

I have a huge ego, and if I work for what I want, I will fucking get it or something even better

It's the tension between these statement that gives rise to human motivation (past the lizard brain motivations like food, water, etc.). It's like in Ernest Becker's "Denial of Death," where he says mankind's greatest achievements are pitiful attempts to live forever. Or F. Scott Fitzgerald's belief that we should be able to "hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function. One should, for example, be able to see that things are hopeless yet be determined to make them otherwise." We are both statistically not special in a world of 8 billion people and such an expansive universe, and yet having an ego is the most human thing ever.

And that's the universe: just paradoxes and the tension between them, and mankind's convenient spot at the center. Everything in the universe is in flux. Nothing in the body or in nature is static. It's all trajectories and voltages and potentials in the Physics sense.

Thus I will both accept that I'm not special and that my ego is gigantic, and that's aight.

How do I channel the powerful force of the ego in a healthy way then, like those superhero movies montage where the hero starts using their powers and sucks at first and breaks everything in their kitchen but then masters them? Honestly, fuck if I know. I have shit to do the rest of tonight, and I'm going to have to think on this one.

Will come back with more ideas, but the goal is not to squash the ego, but to channel it for good. Don't put out the fire, just learn how to use it like any other tool.

That's it for now.

Other quotes that are on my mind today:

Life is a numbers game.

The grass is green where you water it.

Have a good one.

[ardathksheyna]

South Minneapolis in a nut-shell.

I miss South Minneapolis.

That picture is 100% mine. I took it while sitting in my laser blue straight-piped '06 Monte Carlo (it had the 3.9L V6) at the light at 2nd Avenue & East 36th Street—or maybe it was 35th? I can't remember which intersection but I know I was on my way to work because I frequently took 35W to the 3rd Street exit in the morning.

Fuck, I miss those days. This was a few weeks before my life to went to hell in a hand-basket. I think looking back at those times, the deal with ADHD brains not developing fully until mid 30s makes a lot of sense.

Welcome to Hell

That "hell in a hand-basket" deal was me realizing that the status quo of my life as it had been then could not continue. I was 38 years old, yet still thought of myself as 17 and thus still a kid—DESPITE having put myself through school and maintaining a career as a software engineer.

That status quo that I was talking about? Well, I made a decision in my early 20s that I now realize I did not have the adult experience necessary to make.

Long story short, I cosigned a mortgage with my father on a house in South Minneapolis—on Nicollet Avenue roughly a mile south of That Fucking K-Mart.

That was the biggest fuckup of my adult life. What it came down to is that I had to essentially commit financial seppuku to break that status quo.

The reason why I had to take such drastic lengths? Despite promises when we bought the house, dad decided that he didn't want to sell even if I moved out. If I moved in with my boyfriend, I was still on the hook for the mortgage—which meant that there would be no way for my boyfriend and I to build our own life.

What ended up happening was a lot of bad feeling and fighting back and forth not only between my dad and I, but my sisters as well. I was told that it was selfish of me to want to move out without providing for dad first.

When I repeated that line to my mostly male friends—here was their take: your father is a whole grown-ass man. He's able-bodied, and can fucking take care of himself.

After the last fight, I packed up my important shit, got in my car and left. On the drive to Forest Lake, I knew then that I was starting the rest of my life.

Looking back on it, I think if it hadn't been for both my friends and my boyfriend, I probably never would have had the courage to do what I did.

I realize now that all I had been doing up until that point was waiting for my family's permission to live my life and that is not a way to live at all.

The lesson learned from this is one that I'll pass on to anyone under the age of 30 being pressured by their parents to cosign loans for them.

Don't do it.

No, seriously.

Do not do it.

Why? You have no idea where your life is going, or who you'll meet and possibly want to spend the rest of your life with. Maybe you'll want kids, maybe you'll want to travel. You just never know.

The saga of my old pad in South Minneapolis is a long and drawn out one so I'll keep it short.

But I will say this. It does have a happy ending.

[zegumi]

Ushijima Wakatoshi SFW alphabet

alphabet template here

fluff I sfw I gn reader I hcs

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

at first he's quite hesitant on showing affection, wondering if you're comfortable with him being that close to you. he starts off easy: holding hands, letting you rest on him... etc.

once he feels more comfortable with you, he starts placing his head in your lap and giving you little kisses here and there

his favourite forms of affection are: forehead/cheek kisses, back hugs, holding pinkies, and resting his head on your shoulder

when you’re not around he shows affection by talking to you to his closer teammates but subtly, he brings up your name once in a while and a teammate will tease "ooo somebody's in looove" and he starts blushing profusely, asking if they can go back to practice, but the thought of you never leaves

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

being best friends with ushijima seems very rare, he's pretty selective with letting people close enough to earn that title

with you it was unexpected, you weren't afraid or cautious of his stoic upfront. you sat next to him in class and tried to make conversation with him, making sure to include him in conversations and asking how he's doing once in a while. he lets his guard down a little and you guys get even closer, he even invites you over to help with some schoolwork and suddenly you guys are spending more time together outside of school

he's kind of hesitant to call you a best friend, but when he sees that you’re okay calling him yours, he adopts the same title

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

yes yes yes and yes

he is always behind you, resting your head on top of his. if not he'll be facing upwards, lying on his back, your head will be resting on his shoulder and he'll have his arm wrapped around your waist.

he's definitely 99% always the big spoon

but on the rare occasion he wants to be the little spoon, he has both his arms wrapped around your waist, with his head on your chest, your hand running through his hair while your legs are intertwined absolute bliss

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

hell yeah

he's a sucker for the domestic life, waking up with you in your sub-urban house, a train ride away from the city. making cakes with you in your green painted kitchen which took you way longer than it needed to bc you kept messing around

he can cook, oh my, he buys some cookbooks and you guys spend some time with each other

I feel like he wants kids, some mini him and you running around, if not he'll adopt some

him teaching his kids to play volleyball in the backyard, him brushing their teeth and reading them bedtime stories and them giving them a little kiss goodnight cuteness overload

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

definitely depends on the reason why you're breaking up, but in this scenario, let's say he hasn't been home enough and you guys feel like you're not with each other enough pain

he really dreads having to break up with you, but he knows you deserve more than someone who is barely home. he's not harsh about it, he sits you down at a time when you guys are both free and explains why, "maybe the time isn't right, right now"

even though he broke it off, he still thinks about it quite a lot, he really hopes that you guys will find your way back to each other one day even if he knows that it won't be possible bc right now you're happier with someone else :( i love angst

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

his volleyball career kinda gets in the way of him wanting to commit to you, but he wants to show you that you mean the world to him, so i think he proposes in his mid-late twenties

his proposal isn't really that over the top, but he takes you out first for a fancy dinner with the excuse 'can't i treat you once in a while'. it's quite dark outside and you guys are looking over the city, you turn around to ask him something and you see him down one knee lovely

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

he is very gentle... probably bc of his strict upbringing, but he makes sure not to hurt you in any way

he becomes so much more gentle with his words, careful of saying the wrong words because he can't stand the thought of losing you

physically, he tries to make sure not to accidentally knock into you bc this man is so big and if you get ill ushijima is doing anything in his power to get you better, he tries not to get sick in the process, but having you care for him doesn't seem like the worst idea

emotionally, he tries to support you, but he's not the greatest at dealing with emotions, but when supporting you he tries comforting you rather than trying to solve your problems

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

at the beginning of the relationship, i think his hugs are kind of stiff-ish, but once you guys get more comfortable he goes all in

he's such a good hugger. he doesn't do half-hugs, it's all of it or nothing, he engulfs you with his strong arms a little bit too tight but who needs air

if he feels extra clingy back hugs. he loves the feeling of having your figure pressing against his, sometimes his hands grip onto your waist and he'll sway you back and forth while humming to his favourite song

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

as I've mentioned before, you're the first one to say ily in the relationship, but he says it back straight after

i like to think this happens about 5/6 months into the relationship, just when you guys start getting really comfortable around each other

as for using the L-word, he doesn't really say it that often, he believes when something is overused it isn't as special. he only uses it when it needs to be said

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

he doesn't really get jealous easily bc he's kind of oblivious or chooses not to pay attention to it

but when he catches on to whatever's going on, his eyebrows furrow and he'll just give the stare, he'll come near you and put an arm around your waist and slyly try to join the conversation

he knows what he's doing and so does everyone else

the person you're talking to gets a bit intimidated and tries to end the conversation as quickly as possible

you'll try to tease him for his jealously and he'd just change the subject and starts blushing a little, if you try to bring it up later he'd be like 'huh what was that sorry i don't remember'

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

I'm not good with this type of stuff ahh

he's actually pretty good at kissing. he likes soft kisses and little pecks on the shoulder and forehead.

when he's rough or needy, he gets really handsy like hands cupping your cheeks, in your hair, hands pulling your waist in - just very intimate

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

lazy mornings bc who likes being productive all the time

he likes sleeping in on days he has nothing to do, so he’ll be behind you hugging your waist and his head resting on your back, you try to stand up so you can get breakfast done but he pulls you back and says 'come on, just a little more', you know that means another hour but you still get sucked back into his warm embrace

you end up falling asleep and wake up with noises coming from the kitchen. you walk in on him wearing just an apron and his pajama pants, dancing to the radio while making pancakes for breakfast

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

again lazy evening edition bc why not

he comes home early that day, brings home your favourite snacks and asks if you want to watch a movie with him

he grabs a few blankets from your room and you guys decide to watch 13 going on 30 one of my comfort movies

halfway through the movie, he places his head on your laps asking for you to play with his hair, he lies down and you throw some popcorn and skittles in his mouth every few minutes, you tried pouring water but he started choking and spat water all over your shirt

it gets pretty late and cold so he changes you into his hoodie and carries you over to the bedroom. you guys fall asleep to the hums of the city below

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

he's a very reserved person, and i think it's just the way he was raised, talking about feelings wasn't normal in his home growing up

i think with you it takes him some time to open up, he reveals a few things about him and his childhood here and there but nothing major

he doesn't talk about how he feels enough, so it kinda relies on you being able to notice a change in his behaviour which might I say seems extremely hard

i think if you start being more open to him, then he follows on

he gets more comfortable with his emotions around you first and then starts being more open to his team - just give him some time he gets there

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

oh he's so patient, so patient

it takes a LOT to anger him, i don't think you ever have or ever will see this man angry, tbh i don't think you would want to

if you ever lash out at him, he'd sit down and understand where you're coming from, he'd try to calm you down and give you a second to let it all out

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing or do they kind of forget everything?)

he remembers everything, literally everything

you mentioned that you liked mangos yesterday, and boom you've got a lifetime supply in your kitchen /s

he keeps a little note in his notes app just making sure he doesn't forget anything, he has your favourite orders, skin/hair care products you use, and little stuff like your favourite show in there

he does this bc he loves how your eyes beam after realising he remembers the little details

R = Remember (What is their favourite moment in your relationship?)

this one hc is why this took so long, so I decided not to do bc my brain isn’t responding

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

ushijima isn't the overprotective type although he is protective

he doesn't care what you wear or how you present yourself, as long as you’re comfortable, you will have his full support

if he sees someone making you uncomfortable, he is always quick to jump in and say "you're making them uncomfortable can you please excuse yourself". if he sees a situation is making you feel uneasy he will take you and leave, to calm you down or to clear your mind, which ever one is the best choice in that moment

he doesn't feel the need to be protected, he believes that hes strong enough for the both of you sometimes he needs a little help so pls do step in

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

such a big try hard, he puts so much effort into dates, anniversaries, and even mundane everyday activities.

even far into your relationship he still pulls up at your door with a suit and a flower bouquet which he seems to never forget

he always wants everything to be perfect so you'll never forget

he enjoys surprising you with little gifts to remind you that he still cares. he seems like the type to buy you a promise ring, and oh my is it beautiful

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

this is hard bc in my eyes this man can't do any wrong, but its probably how he can't express his emotions very well

everyone gets in a bad mood once in a while, but for ushijima its different, the stress of volleyball gets to him and he just ends up shutting everyone out, including you. he was never taught how to properly talk abt how he feels so he just holds it in with never intending to let it out

if you try to ask him whats wrong then he just grunts and shrugs it off

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

he isn’t insecure for how he looks physically, he works out and maintains a healthy lifestyle, and he was blessed with that beautiful face of his *chefs' kiss

he's always hygienic (bare minimum), he cuts his hair regularly, keeps his hands nice and clean, with his nails well-trimmed

he likes to keep his appearance up and always looks like he should be on the front cover of a magazine but so effortlessly

bonus: he smells so good, he wears expensive cologne and zooweemama its so tasty, you'll hug him and never want to let go just because

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

he wouldn't necessarily feel incomplete with out you, he'd feel a bit empty

he forgets how much he misses you when he goes abroad for matches and he can't see you for a week straight. he makes sure to send videos and voice notes rather than texts so you can send some back. he video calls everyday, no matter the time difference just so he can see you in real time

if you guys take a break in the relationship, he finds his self drifting back into his stoic shell. he tries his best not to bc he knows how much he loves the person you've helped him become

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

doesn't know how to flirt hehe

he tries to use a smooth pick up line once in a while but they all end up with him in a flustered mess before he can even finish a sentence, i think we should leave the flirting to you

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

liars/dishonest people

he can't stand it when somebody lies to him, its agitating when someone he cares for feels the need to lie to him, it makes him feel like they don't trust him enough

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

he's a quite a light sleeper and wakes up pretty easily. he also looks dead when he sleeps, for example most days he sleeps pretty early bc he's worn out and you come into the bedroom and see him lying down on his back, his chest isn't even moving like it should be, but you'll get into bed with him and his first instinct is to wrap his arms around you and give you a kiss

i think he sleep talks, omg just imagine ushijima whispering about the weirdest things in his dreams. you recorded him once and showed him when he woke up and he got a bit embarrassed and started laughing

here's the hcs for mornings with ushi

this took me so long omg >o< I really hope I portrayed his character well bc he’s such a lovely person

make sure to take care of yourselves :)

reblogs are very much appreciated <3

requests are open

[miraculous-trinity-leo]

Tᕼᗴ ᑕᕼᗩOTIᑕ ᗩᑎᘜᗴᒪ

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6)

Chapter 3: Au Revoir Gotham My True Home

•—–—–·†·–—–—•

Marinette explained what happened and that she didn't mean to cause trouble, she didn't know why the bats were looking for her (author to audience... it's because she looks like one of his bat kids gone rouge.) When she asked how they knew the Bat was looking for her, she found out that Selina was actually dating the Bat... So Marinette was very surprised at that, her family talked about it and a few days after her birthday she'll be going to Paris, France with Selina to be with a family friend of hers. Marinette was now really thinking she was cursed, but she made sure to take it in stride and spend as much time with her friends and family as possible.

"Doan wawhry suguh, we'll make sure tuh visit as much as possible, yuh can even visit us durin' summuh and wintuh break." - Harley held back the tears as she hugged Marinette, Bud, Lou, Ivy, Selina, Ed and even Frank joined in on it.

……… ………

Marinette was out with her friends still not sure how to tell them, she started with the obvious.

"Sooo... tomorrow I turn 10... the double digits." - Marinette

"Soon you'll be one of us!" - Garfield gave Marinette a side hug with a big smile, god he made it harder to tell them

"So what do you want to do? We can celebrate, tomorrow and the day after that, and the day after that, heck we can celebrate for the whole week while we're at it!" - Garfield

Rachel noticed the sad smile Marinette had as Garfield continued talking.

"Is there something you need to tell us?" - Rachel's words stoped Garfield in his tracks, he then looked at a slightly teary Marinette, and he felt a slight tinge of pain in his chest.

"I- um, I'm moving this Saturday... I'm sorry I really don't want to, but- *hic* I-" - Marinette was cut off by Garfield giving her a hug, he rubbed small circles on her back as she let out a few sobs. Rachel patting her shoulder to try and comfort her.

After they were like that for a few minutes, they decided to get ice cream

……… ……… ………

"I'm sorry." - Marinette eating her chocolate chip ice cream

"It's not your fault Mari, besides, we can officially say we have a pen pal in Paris." - Garfield with his chocolate mint ice cream trying to lighten the mood, managed to get a chuckle out of Marinette.

"We can still video call, or text you. And your parents said you can visit on summer and winter break." - Rachel just starting her strawberry ice cream

"But what if I need a friend to talk to when I can't sleep? Or if I need a movie buddy? Or gaming buddy?" - Marinette

"There are online multiplayer games we can play you know." - Rachel

"Yeah, and I'm sure you'll make friends over there really quickly, I mean you already know a few other languages, including French, so there isn't any communication problems." - Garfield

"I wish you guys could come with me..." - Marinette almost done with her ice cream

"... Didn't you say you always wanted a hamster, maybe one that's unique, like a the rare Green Gotham Hamster?" - Garfield with a mischievous grin

"Selina's family friends own a bakery, so no pets allowed. Sorry Rare Green Gotham Hamster, I'm afraid you're staying native to Gotham." - Marinette said patting his shoulder.

"Wait they own a bakery?! As in you can be on a sugar high 24/7?! Take me with you!!" - Garfield

……… ……… ………

Soon it was time for them to go home, when Marinette got home, she continued packing what she would need, making sure that her Siren plushies where safely secure, and then went to eat dinner.

The next day she made sure to get up early, Garfield and Rachel knew where she lived, and wanted to make sure everything was ready for them, setting up the games they would play into the night, and the movies they would watch after that.

She then went to the Gardens to greet her Mom and the plants, doing the usual routine of checking all the plants, complimenting and watering them. During which a sleepy Harley walked over giving Ivy and Marinette a morning kiss before going to make her coffee.

At breakfast she didn't see her Aunt yet, she assumed she was robbing someone rich again.

……… Over to Catwoman ………

"Come ta mama." - Catwoman mumbled as she used her claws to cut the glass surrounding an old elegant purple sapphire that belonged to one of Gotham's founding fathers' wives.

……… Back to Marinette ………

About an hour after breakfast Garfield and Rachel came over, holding Marinettes' rapped presents, they started the day off with trivia games, which they called the MIQ (which can mean either Marinette Isley-Quinzel or in this case Memory Intelligence Quiz) which Marinette and Rachel came to a tie followed by Ivy, then Harley, and Garfield. They then moved on to board games, Marinette decided to play The Game of Life rather than Monopoly (because lets be honest, who has ever finished that game in the time of a signle day? An extreme speedrunner... maybe.) while the adults got the cake ready. Surprisingly Garfield won, he got the acting career, a sports car, a nice old fashioned mid modern house, a wife, and 3 kids... Marinette got the fashion designer career, got a motorcycle, and a small, but nice victorian house, a husband, and one kid... and Rachel got the scientist career (because science is just simplified mortal magic), a delorean car (and even said "Since science is magic I can make it fly, so technically, I don't need roads where I'm going."), a modern cabin in the woods, single (she didn't want a significant other to interrupt her magic science) and got a pet bird.

Once Selina and Ed came over, they began the party, playing games like DDR, Ultimate Mecha Strike 2, and Racing games.

When it came time for Marinette to blow out her candles, she wished that everything would be okay, and that she will be able to come back to Gotham permanently, and blew them out.

She then got to open her presents, she started with Harley's, and got a custom baseball bat that was a dark steel blue, with a light grey handle grip, and it had the words "Quinn For Da Win" on it, putting a smile on her face, when she opened Ivy's gift she got seeds of her favorite flowers to plant over in Paris. She then opened her Uncle Ed's gift, which was a small watch that had special A.I., it had a cover over the inside screen that would flip open to reveal another screen. The cover was silver with a blue question mark, and when it opened, it showed the time, and the location you where in, it could also act as a GPS, and a phone (it could even play music AND had an incredible battery life span). She then moved on to her Aunt Selina's gift, finding a small purple sapphire in the shape of a cat paw, surrounded in silver. She then opened Rachel's gift, it was a travel mug that said "Coffee lives in my veins." (Marinette started drinking coffee recently) which made Marinette laugh, and then she got to Garfield's gift. When she opened it, she found a handmade charm bracelet, it had animals that she really liked around it, and there was one that was a small tiger, with it's eyes and nose having a light green peridot stone, to represent the first day they met. She put the bracelet on her right rist and thanked Garfield for it, and gave everyone a big hug.

She spent the rest of the day playing with her friends, having a wonderful time, and getting a massive sugar rush from all the cake they had. When it came time for dinner they were running low on energy, but were back to normal after Harley snuck some coffee into their food... The only thoughts that went through Garfield and Rachel's minds where "That's why Mari drinks this stuff..."

After dinner they played all kinds of video games, and ended it by watching Back To The Future. They fell asleep some time after 2am.

……… ……… …….

The next morning they all had breakfast and then spent the day playing parkour tag over roofs and playing I spy games. And at the end of the day Marinette gave her friends a big hug, before heading back home. She spent her time with her moms, Uncle, and Frank, playing more boardgames and discussing what she should do to make friends...

"Just be yawhself, we love yuh fawh who yuh are, and I'm sure everyone in Paris will love yuh too... if dey doan, den dey most likely have a massive defective reject of a brain." - Was Harley's opinion

"Riddle the f-ck out of their brain, if they can solve all of them, and like you for you, then they are worthy." - Which was Ed's opinion

"Use a chemical based compound from the magnolia flower, combined with three tulip petals, one rose petal, and pollen from a lilac to create a befriending potion." - Ivy's words made everyone silent before Ed spoke up

"... Harley if you're being mind controlled blink." - Ed deadpaned, which had Marinette cackling

"I'm not bein' mind controlled, also yuh nawhmally say ‘blink once or twice’ not just ‘blink’ I could blink at any random interval and yuh woun't know what tuh tink, and here I thoughtcha were a genius." - Harley with her head on Ivy's lap as Marinette starts wheezing.

"I think y'all broke her." - Frank just pointed to Marinette as she was still cackling and wheezing while in the fetal position.

That's when Selina walked in...

"What the hell did you guys do to Kitten?!" - Selina dropping the bags she got from some high end shop, and after they made sure Marinette was still alive they continued their game... and Marinette may have actually written the list of ingredients for that position, but only as a last resort. When it was time for them to sleep Marinette spent the night with her moms, like she use to when she was 4.

She got up early to make sure everything was ready, she had her sketch book in her backpack, as well as some pencils, ear buds, snacks and a picture of her with her family and friends. She decided to wear her new watch and charm bracelet as she finished checking her bag, she then went into the garden to say goodbye to all the plants, and to give Bud, Lou and Frank one last goodbye. She had about 3 hours before her and her Aunt were to head to the airport, and she spent that time with her moms, almost never leaving their side.

……… ……… …….

As the plane took off she looked out the airplane window, saying goodbye to Gotham, until her next visit home....

•—–·★·–—•

Chapter 3 complete, also just in case I didn't describe her B-day gifts good enough, here's what they look like (꒪꒳꒪)

Hope you're all having an amazing day, staying safe and rockin' all positive vibes,!BUG-OUT! 💮🐞💮

〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜Tag List〜(꒪꒳꒪)〜

1st Place★: @jumpingjoy82

2nd Place★: @myazael

3rd Place★: @solangelo252

@fandom-trapped-03, @zorua-adorable, @blueblossombliss, @thefangirlwholiterallydies, @woe-is-me0, @lady-bee-fechin, @jayjayspixiepop, @kashlyn, @toodaloo-kangaroo, @buginetye, @our-preciousss , @vroomtaka, @alessialeone6997

[captainstiddies]

Ali Roma; kageyama tobio x reader pt.1

a/n: i just found out this man goes to Italy soooooo enjoy this

includes some really cute fluff, it's mainly over the phone, also some details of what ya'll were like in high school

pairing: reader x kageyama

His head had been spinning since he got the news from his agent. He had visited Italy once with his old high school team when Noya first moved there but, living there? He couldn't really picture it. He didn't know the language or the culture, and it was so intimidating. The only other person he even knew living there was you. Your entire highschool career was spent pining for each other, but it was never the right time, he was always so focused on Volleyball and you had your own interests and hobbies that took up all of your time. It wasn't long after graduation that you decided to move out to Italy, you went to Sapienza University and ended up working at a consulate for Japan in Rome.

The call had woken you from your sleep. Turning over to check the time it was around 3 in the morning. You were originally going to ignore it, call whoever it was back later on but the name that popped up completely stunned you awake. It had been months since he had stopped by while visiting an old teammate and had been completely radio silent since.

"Tobio?" Voice laced with sleep but he still couldn't help but sigh, it always calmed him when you said his name like that, or anyway if he was going to be honest. "Y/n, sorry I just- uh um, I didn't mean to wake you." You couldn't help but laugh sleepily. How was he still so awkward after all this time, and over the phone! "It's fine, is everything alright? You sound ... you sound uncomfortable." Sitting up the sheets that covered you moved slightly, the cold air of Rome breezing through your curtains. "'m fine just... I've got this opportunity and I just, I always went to you for like advice and this is well big." Nodding as if he could see you sighed, of course you missed him, missed the late night talks in your room the secret kisses that you shared without talking about it the next day but how could you help him so far away?

"Tobio, I don't know how I can help you. I'm on the other side of the world-" "That's why Y/n, I got offered a position on Ali Roma, the uh, volleyball team in uh, Rome. It's great pay and a really good team. I'd be starting setter I just. What if ..." Hushing him you finally stood up, walking through your small townhouse, it was littered with photos from home, little trinkets from your time traveling Italy. It most importantly though had a photo from your graduation day right above your couch, it was you, Tsukishima, Yamaguchi, Hinata and Tobio. Your eyes locked with the picture as you spoke. "You'll be amazing. I watched the olympics when you played in 2016, any team would want you. You'd love Italy too, I mean there's less milk flavours but..." A soft laugh leaves you until you leaned against the wall. "It'd be nice to see you more too." It's barely a whisper but from the soft sigh that leaves him, you know he heard you. "yeah it would...Um, I gotta go though my agent's here, they need an answer so...I'll call you back, maybe when it's not so uh late." Smiling you were glad he couldn't see the little tears that slipped down your cheeks. "Yeah, goodbye Tobio. "Bye, y/n also, I will call you back, promise."

It was a week later when you finally heard from Tobio. Heels clicked as you made your way down the stone streets to your house a bag filled with groceries balanced on your hip. As you turned a corner you could see a figure leaning against your door frame. It didn't help that the sun was shining in your eyes and you couldn't see who it was for the life for you until you were mere meters apart. His blue eyes were burning into you as you stopped, the bag fell from your grasp. "Oh my god, Tobio..."

imma make a part two with some fluffy reunification smut because why the hell not!

[khaleesiofalicante]

HI, IT'S ME! YOUR LOCAL CHAOTIC WEIRDO!!!!! I'M BACK AGAIN LIKE I AM TWICE EVERY WEEK

IT'S MY BOY DAVID THIS TIME! WHY AM I SO HYPER! MAYBE BECAUSE THEY KISSED! AND I HAD TO SUPPRESS MY SCREAMS BCAUSE IM IN CLASS AND THE REST OF MY FAMILY IS OUTSIDE MY DOOR (NOT LITERALLY OFC)

OK OK OK OK OK OK

MAX AND DAVID ARE AT THE LONDON INSTITUTE YESYESYESYES

He rather liked that part in a story – when the hero fell, and everything seemed bleak. It always meant that hope was just around the corner. Because darkness never lasted. It was always followed by light. There was nothing more beautiful than that kind of sunrise.

THIS

I literally live my life by this analogy

AHHH DAVID IS ON HIS TRAVEL YEAR AND MAX IS WITH HIM

SCREAM

well i can't scream because my mom is sitting right there and I have class in 4 minutes so imma smile really wide

“Are you planning to read the entire library during your travel year?” Max chuckled.

“Of course not,” David replied. “I will need longer than a year to accomplish that goal.”

Me.

Wait

does max not being able to make portals have something to do with his lineage?

like

demon parent

ok so my programming class started 2 minutes early but screw programming I'm gonna be studying minds not this shit

ok that's a very bad attitude for someone who needs good grades in this year

Max was always hungry.

this is so me

KIT

KIT

KIT

KIT

KIT

KIT

TY

THEY MENTIONED TY

also if David doesn't become an institute head in the future THEN WHAT'S THE POINT

“Where is the kitchen?” Max interrupted.

max is such a mood

He had told Max that he had centuries to perfect his magic, that there was no need to rush it. Max had given him a noncommittal nod and nothing more.

HE'S GONNA MAKE THE BEST PORTALS YOU'LL SEE

“I won’t tell the Consul,” Kit winked.

At the mention of the Consul, David straightened up. He had been trying to get into Alec Lightwood’s good graces for years now. He didn’t think sharing a room with his son would do him any favors.

DAVID UDUCDFUHKDUHVUHSDH

PLEASE IF WE DON'T GET A CUTE ALEC AND DAVID SCENE SOON

KIT CALLED TESSA MOM

oh my god

Word was that Mr. Herondale had gone back to his obsession with brewing tea.

JACE

I have so many emotions right now but all I'm gonna say is that I'm so so proud of Rafael

“Do you not want to sleep with me?” Max asked.

UH-

WELL-

DAVID STOP THINKING ABOUT THE FUTURE AND ALL THE SHIT

STOP IT

OH MY GOD THE ONE BED TROPE

MAX IS IN HIS ARMS I'M ABOUT TO-

takes a deep breath don't scream. everyone outside this door thinks you're taking programming class

OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE JUST GET TOGETHER ALREADY

AWW JULIAN PAINTED PORTRAITS FOR THE INSTITUTE

The one of Will Herondale and Tessa Gray – A love that had transcended reality and lasted a lifetime.

The one of James Herondale and Cordelia Carstairs – A love that had started with a lie and then blossomed into nothing but happiness and devotion.

The one of Lucie Herondale and Jesse Blackthorn – A love that had been so powerful that it rewrote the past.

The one of Jace Herondale and Clary Fairchild – A love that had walked through hell and shaken up the heavens.

And then there the final one. The one of Kit Herondale and Tiberius Blackthorn – A love that had survived distance and darkness and doom.

This omg...

He wanted a love story. The kind he read in the books. The kind he saw in these portraits.

But he wasn’t a Herondale. He wasn’t sure if he was destined for that kind of love.

HEY

DON'T THINK LIKE THAT

The first part though

same

He might have been a little too excited. It was biologically impossible to control yourself when you find a stranger reading your favorite book in the whole world.

SO TRUE

“I see you already made a new friend,” Max said.

He sounded a little…odd. As if he was not pleased that David had made a new friend.

honey...

take a guess

can I jump in and bash their heads together?

“You are thinking of conjuring chocolate syrup, aren’t you?” David chuckled.

“How do you always know what’s on my mind?” Max chuckled back.

Because I know you, David wanted to say. I just wish I knew what’s in your heart too.

OH MY GOD I CANT WITH THIS

“You get chocolate syrup! You get chocolate syrup! You get chocolate syrup!” Max was yelling, standing on the chair.

They residents laughed harder, and David shook his head fondly. He hoped one day Max would pursue a career in theatre. He was a born showman.

can I have chocolate syrup?

also, the way David is just so fond of him like DYUSDGYJCDYUJM

“By the angel, do you have to be a drama queen about everything?” the boy next to them muttered – not so quietly.

David blinked. That was uncalled for.

But Max being Max was completely unfazed. “Of course I do. My Bapa would be personally offended otherwise.”

exactly you rude little shit

Max often pretended like people’s words didn’t hurt him - just as he pretend that fire doesn’t burn or wounds don’t bleed.

wow ok stop calling me out

Is max jealous??????

is he??????

how are people so good at languages like damn

TY

TY

TY

TY

“Oh my god,” Max groaned. “Is he already telling people to check on me?”

LMAO

using mundane medicine...

that's risky

but it's also something that WILL help

can't warlocks tamper with the blood samples?

A part of him wondered if that’s why he had agreed to send Max away to London – at least for a week. Because sometimes you didn’t want other people to see you were hurting.

alec I really goddamn hope you're dealing with this well

some of whom had even decided to die than get help from a warlock.

alright then gets my knives but you chose this :D

Nobody brought a book down for breakfast if they didn't like to read.

yes but sometimes also to seem busy so people won't bother you or you won't look alone.

“I know,” the boy said as he walked past them to the gate. “I sat on the stairs and thought about life for a few good minutes.”

his family is the one who took over David's previous institute (i can't spell that. marse- marselli- wat??) methinks.

The gang always visited whenever all of them were in the city together. They would have so much fun! Of course, the 'fun' mostly entailed Rafael stopping Georgia from drinking random potions she found in the stalls, Selena stopping Lexi from opening a psychic booth to help people talk to Raziel and of course David stopping Max from running to the gambling booths.

LMAO, I CANT WITH THIS-

Rafe: I am anxiety.

me at any given moment

EW TESTICLES HE'S EATING THOSE-

ok maybe I'm the only person who's really picky when it comes to food and doesn't eat the majority of things

“Anything on Magnus Bane?” Max asked.

“No,” the woman snapped and shoved some of the letters into a bag and hide it under the table. “Leave Magnus Bane alone!”

“Appreciate your loyalty,” Max winked at her and started examining a diary.

I like her.

"Everyone should be participating in this" -my programming teacher

me, an intellectual: participating in what?? goes to the class web THE FUCK IS THAT

“Something for the shadowhunter?” the woman smiled. “Perhaps an unpublished snippet from the Beautiful Cordelia?”

“Do you have any love letters?” David asked.

“Hmmm,” the woman went through the pages. “I do have a correspondence between an Iblis demon and Christopher Lightwood? Would you be interested in that?”

if u don't mind I would love to see both of those-

you know I just remembered I have a computer assignment I need to submit by the end of this week fml

“Never fall in love with an immortal,” she giggled again. “We don’t like staying in one place.”

SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

MAX WHERE ARE YOU

why are we using x and 3 in programming class what the heck is going on

“I’m not just some warlock,” Max said, his voice low. “I’m Magnus Bane’s son.”

GIVE HIM THAT NECKLACE BACK

we usually have programming once a week on our physical school days and those are fun because my and my friend are continuously passing notes and talking to each other through writing

The scene where Max fought off all the evil people who tried to steal his valuable belonging. He would fight without breaking a sweat and throw magic fireballs at everyone and then get his necklace back. And then he would kiss David in front of everyone and it would somehow rain all of a sudden.

But life wasn’t a movie or a book. Life was just life.

life's boring

fuck life

I just heard a student ask "why are we not taking out the values of b and c" BESTIE I THOUGHT WE WERE DOING PROGRAMMING AND NOT ALGEBRA?????

“I know there wasn’t anyone to protect you before,” Magnus Bane had said. “But we are here now. We will protect you. This will protect you.”

He hadn’t wanted it back then. He didn't even want it even now.

He didn’t want something to protect him. Most importantly, he didn’t want to cover his scar. He didn’t want to hide it. He wasn’t ashamed of it. It wasn’t a mark of a victim. It was the mark of a survivor.

So, David had smiled and given the bracelet back.

“I never wanted to be protected,” David had replied. “I only ever wanted to be loved.”

The warlock had smiled at that and given David a hug. It had felt different than other hugs he had experienced since he had come to New York.

It wasn’t just the magic. Magnus Bane carried so much love inside himself you could literally feel it through him.

I'm gonna cry during my programming class (where we're doing variables apparently all of a sudden??)

this is so beautiful

“I wasn’t talking about Bapa,” Max said now. “I was talking about the other one.”

David chuckled at that. “Oh, yeah. He is definitely going to kill you.”

what flowers would you like at your funeral?

so Jackson has family troubles

I've definitely got that

yeah I know what it's like to be jealous of someone else's perfect family

JACKSON WTF

Is he trying to ruin max's relationship with his family???

oh hell no

JACKSON THE AUDACITY

“One stolen necklace, One broken nose and One bruised cheek,” he said. “And you’ve been in London for less than a day.”

kit seriously? but is he wrong though?

“This is what I get for falling for a Lightwood-Bane,” David sighed and walked through the portal.

WELL AT LEAST HE'S SELF AWARE

Jackson...

in some ways, I can empathize with him. my younger self anyway. but Jackson this is not how you do things

There was a moment of silence and then Magnus Bane giggled.

“I do love it when the quiet ones go feral,” the warlock grinned.

MAGNUS

NOT.THE.TIME

(me too)

“David!” Mr Herondale gasped. “Is your hand okay?”

yup that's Jace y'all

David hated violence. He hated fighting – which he was often not allowed to say out loud considering he was a shadowhunter.

But it was the truth. He hated hurting people – or even things. It made him feel sick.

“It’s alright, Chouchou,” Mr Herondale ran a hand through David’s hair. “Next time, just-”

“Use my words?” David asked.

“Just don’t get caught,” the man winked.

and that is why I would never want to be a shadowhunter.

I know saying that doesn't do anything but when I first read tsc I wanted to be a shadowhunter really badly and damn that was some time ago but now...violence of any kind is my biggest trigger idek why. and I hate that so much because what kind of a person gets triggered by loud voices and fighting EVEN ON SCREEN??? I usually just push myself to watch stuff because it's dumb. I refuse to see trigger warnings before reading a book or watching a show because damn it, I should be able to stand those things I'm, not a child. and it may be doing me more harm than good but I shouldn't feel like this in the first place

okay...that was long

ANYWAY

“David, I appreciate you standing up for Max,” the Consul said. “But next time, please try not to punch anyone in the face.”

“Yes, sir,” David nodded. “Because it’s wrong.”

“Because it means more paperwork for me,” the Consul groaned and then straightened up. “But yes. Absolutely. Very wrong. No punching people!”

LMAO ALEC

Jackson...

oh

oh

oh

I was wrong then

He was grinning. Magnus Bane must have raised hell in the shadow market.

that must have been fun

Max was doing that thing where he was not trying to pout but he was mostly definitely pouting. It made David want to kiss him. But then the Consul spoke, and David reminded himself he didn’t want to be the third person to get punched in the face this evening.

well-

“I understand that Jackson has been through a lot. But that’s not an excuse for him to hurt those around him. I learned that lesson the hard way. So, you shouldn’t excuse his behaviour.”

someone's trauma and pain is never an excuse to hurt others

but that doesn't mean we should invalidate their trauma either

“You can stay back and try to help him. I won’t stop you,” the man got up now. “But if he tries to hurt you-”

“You will unleash hell?” David chuckled.

“Worse,” the other man grinned. “I will unleash Lexi.”

that is much much worse

Books brought him comfort in so many ways. Just holding one in his hands automatically made him feel better.

oh my god

he gets it

I always have a book with me when I'm out even if I'm not gonna get the time to read it because just the weight and comfort of it in my hands or in my backpack brings me so much comfort and helps with my social anxiety so much

no one understands when I try to tell them that

you get it...

someone gets it finally

AYYY IRENE

“David, it’s very sweet that you want to protect Jackson,” Kit pointed out. “But literally no one is buying that. Not even Irene.”

The lynx purred on his lap as if she agreed with Kit.

“I could break into a liquor cabinet,” David said a little indignantly.

David is the nicest you can get

David wouldn’t. Apparently, everyone already seemed to know that - even the lynx he had met five minutes ago.

we are solving something in class and it's really quiet because we're all doing our work (I'm reading the fic so-) and this one person had their mic open and they kept on whispering their steps and it was so weird I cant-

BUT YES DAVID IS A CINNAMON ROLL. EVEN THE LYNX KNOWS

“We were talking about shitty fathers,” Jackson pointed out. “You’re welcome to stay.”

“I’m gonna need something stronger than red wine for this conversation,” Kit chuckled.

I remember that bitch

David used to do it when he was a child. He used to pretend his life was a story. He used to pretend everything that happened to him was happening to some other boy – a boy who wasn’t real. A boy who lived inside a book. Because it hurt a little less when you pretend like it wasn’t happening to you.

But the pain was still very real.

OK YOU CAN STOP CALLING ME OUT NOW

“I fucking hate ogres,” he said through gritted teeth.

“Was your father an ogre too?” Jackson asked.

“He was more like a harpy,” Kit snorted. “He was always flying and fleeing. I didn’t know how deep his talons were in my head until it was too late.”

you really like traumatizing all your characters, don't you?

I really fucking hope the ogre got what he deserved

and if the angel is dead then fuck everyone

“I mean, there was that time when Sebastian Morgenstern turned my father into the endarkened, and then he went around killing people. So, I would say he was more like a zombie,” the man was explaining now. “The zombie father tried to kill me but my brother killed him first.”

“Good lord!” Jackson said in shock.

Kit chuckled softly. “Boy do shadowhunters need therapy.”

they really do

He knew about those from New York. He knew Mr Herondale and Miss Fairchild went for one together.

YES GET THEM THERAPY

“Yikes,” Kit chuckled. “I’d prefer something classier. How about London Boys?”

“None of us are from London though,” Tiberius pointed out.

“The Beatles are not actually beetles, Ty,” Kit chuckled. “It’s just for pizazz.”

damn guys

Then the idea of a band turned into a possible YouTube channel where they would react to cute animal videos.

YS DO IT

“When people do awful things, really awful things, at one point we stop being surprised. Like what Valentine did to his children or what our fathers did to us or what those women did to Rafael. We might have been shocked or disgusted. But it wasn’t unrealistic, was it?”

“I guess not,” the boy said.

“Even when they did the most unimaginable acts of cruelty, it somehow managed to fit into our imagination. We accepted that the world can be unrealistically cruel. The kind of cruelty we will never understand. But why isn’t it the same for kindness? Why is that when someone is too kind, we automatically feel uncomfortable? We judge their intensions or think they are just pretending to be nice. We think they are being unrealistic. Why is that?”

we get so used to cruelty that kindness feels weird

“But that’s how our life works, doesn’t it? It’s a giant ball of what ifs and could have beens and if nots. What if my father had loved me instead of hurt me? Could I have been kinder if I was hugged instead of being abused? Would have I been a different person if not for my trauma? Our lives are an endless collection of theories about our real selves. The one didn’t we never had the chance to become.”

THIS

I used to spend a bunch of time on the what-ifs but those are useless. so screw the what-ifs and live in the present

“I guess we’ll never know, Jackson. None of us will never know how we would have turned out if things had been different for us. We never got the chance to be who were meant to be. Instead, we became who we had to become to survive what we went through. We will never know our true selves. We only know the version of us that made it through all the trauma.”

“Christ, that’s depressing,” Jackson said.

“It is,” David nodded. “But we made it through. We survived. I think we should focus on that.”

you survived. that's what matters

“There is nothing wrong with wanting to be rescued,” David smiled.

I wish I had heard this before...

maybe I don't always have to be strong. maybe it's ok sometimes just want to be saved.

I'm so happy that both Jackson and David found each other

David had learned Gaelic. Jackson had learned how to play the piano.

They had laughed and lived and loved and learned.

And they had survived – one day at a time. The London Boys.

they survived.

I know I'm always key smashing and screaming but these words, these lines, all these chapters mean so so much to me.

“You’ll write to me, won’t you?” David asked, hugging Jackson closely.

“No,” Jackson replied. “I will FaceTime you like a normal person, you weirdo!”

David laughed at that. “I prefer letters. They are more emotional.”

“I’ll text you,” Jackson countered. “With emojis.”

oh to have someone write me letters.

I love writing letters

once at the end of a school year, I wrote little letters to everyone in my class anonymously. even the people who had been mean to me. that was like 1-2 years after my transfer to that school and everyone practically hated me but I wanted to do something nice because who knows what someone is going through. I ended up not putting them in people's desks...

I threw them all away :)

but writing letters is superior

I often write my feelings down and give the letter to someone rather than talk to someone

if you receive a letter from me or a custom-made gift...you have reached my ultimate friendship

oh my god. THIS IS HOW I SHOULD TALK TO ONE OF MY FRIENDS ABOUT MY FEELINGS

It's kind of been a mess between us and I want to talk to her but I didn't know how to.

this is why i shouldn't send asks-

JACKSON CATCHING UP ON MAX AND DAVID

“You know what it means,” Jackson grinned harder. “Also, if that wanker tries to break your heart, I will break his face.”

“You know he is the Consul’s son?” David giggled.

“I’ve done it once and I will do it again,” Jackson shrugged. “He better treat you right.”

"wanker"

I HAVE A BRITISH ONLINE FRIEND AND THEY CALLED OUR AMERICAN ONLINE FRIEND A WANKER

AND OUR OTHER BRITISH FRIEND JOINED IN

WHILE ALL THE NON-BRITISH PEOPLE WERE LIKE "huh"

Lexi had cut her hair even shorter. Her girlfriend apparently got something called an undercut.

“Just in case someone dared to assume we were straight,” she had winked at him.

how many years has this fake dating been going on...

CENTURION SELENA

fterA the twins went to bed, David stepped out of the institute and went looking for his heart.

"went looking for his heart"

OH FUCK I FORGOT TO JOIN MY CLASS

MAX STOP DEPLETING YOUR SELF GODDAMN

And then somewhere along the way, Max’s heartbeat had become the steadiest thing in David’s life.

Max, with all his chaos and drama and danger, had become the steadiest thing in David’s life.

oh my god that's a parallel from canon

“Tell me why.”

“Ain't nothing but a heart break!!"

Max-

Max could make fireballs that killed demons on the spot. He could summon things from anywhere. He could heal people with his eyes closed. He was one of the youngest warlocks allowed to visit the spiral labyrinth.

Max was a warlock in every sense. A good one. A great one even.

he is so talented...

Only idiots would underestimate Magnus Bane’s power.

EXACTLY

He is probably going to be Consul like next week.”

David chuckled. “Next week?”

next week????

“Yeah, his smoking habits,” Max rolled his eyes.

Rafael wasn’t the smoker in the family. He knew who it was, but David would never open his mouth. It wasn’t his secret to tell.

this keeps on getting better

“It’s my hair!” David laughed.

“And you’re my David!” Max argued. “I say you are not allowed to grow your hair.”

MY DAVID

MY DAVID

MY DAVID

“I don’t want to downworld-splain it to you.”

Max blinked and then laughed. “You don’t want to what?”

“Downworld-splain,” David mumbled. “It’s when shadowhunters explain downworlders how to be downworlders.”

they were SO close to kissing

I'm gonna get in there and lock them in a closet together and tell them to FUCKING GET WITH IT

Remember who you are. Remember where you stand.

remember who you are. remember where you stand...

I know this is supposed to be about portals.

OH MY GOD THEY KISSED

THEY KISSED

IM SO CLOSE TO SCREAMING CLASS AND EVERYONE OUTSIDE THIS ROOM BE DAMNED

OH MY GOD DAVID FELL

reminds me of when alec fell down the stairs-

OH MY GOD I'M GONNA SCREAM

WE'RE GONNA GET MORE MAVID CONTENT SOON I'M SCREAMING INTERNALLY UYDRVFY7VSDU7UYVFSDUYGCADUYIGJCDSHJKGDVCSUGISDVHVF

ok, I have a computer assignment to get to and tests to study for. BUT I LOVED THIS CHAPTER SO SO MUCH!! THEY FINALLY KISSED I'M SO HAPPY!!!!!

Also I know I tend to go off track and you can totally ignore that. i just go crazy. BYEE

This live blog gives me so much life you don't even know. I am go glad you enjoyed the chapter. I love hearing you rant about it. It's refreshing lol.

And I looooooove the lil anecdotes you share in between. Also wtf is a programming class like nobody wants to learn programme what kind of hetero nonsense I-

FINISH YOUR ASSIGNMENTS AND STUDY FOR YOUR TESTS I'LL SEE YOU SOON :)

[sery-chan-13]

Agape

Last Boss/ Takatora Samura × Reader

Warnings: swearing, past trauma, cheating, murder. Past trauma. I know I said it, but you know

Eros, sexual or erotic love. Can be the love you share with a partner. Lust.

Philia, platonic love. The love you share with friends.

Storge, natural love. The love you share with your family.

Philautia, love of self.

Pragma, long standing love. The love of a married couple.

Agápe, unconditional or Devine love.

Ludus, childish or playful love/flirting.

You laughed, watching the screen, seeing Ludus try to talk some sense into the boy she was helping. "Look at those two getting along," Eros said. "It's been nine years, no? You'd hope they're getting along," you laughed. The screen changed, and you jumped back. "Oh, someone said the word love around divinities," Eros noted. "Ooh, a job for me? It's been so long," you excitedly said, pressing the button. "Well, they're not talking anymore. But, I'll just assume the best and go," you sighed, touching the scene. You felt cold wash over you and shivered. It was so overwhelmingly cold.

"W-what the hell?" You shivered, looking around. There was no one. You sighed, they must have left the room or hidden. "Hello?" You questioned, looking around. The room was a mess, you could barely walk through. "W-what are- who are you?'' A voice questioned. You turned to face them, and saw a man with tattoos on his skin. He was wearing a hoodie without sleeves, most presumably to show off his tattoos. "Silly, you should know. You summoned me!" You laughed, floating over the mess. 'And now she's floating... what is this mess?' He thought to himself, staring up at you. "I didn't summon anything," he stated. You tilted your head to the side. "Oh... It was an accident? Yeah, I get that a lot, but now I'm stuck with you until I help you fall in love, sooooo... let's start with introductions and get that out of the way, yeah?" You suggested, sticking your hand out. He looked at it, sceptical that he would actually touch something. You were either someone that Niragi was using to prank him, or a figment of his imagination. "My name is (Y/N), I'm the cupid of Agape. What's yours?" You introduced. He didn't answer, staring at you. "Ok, well, um... anything you want to talk about, mystery man?" You questioned with a smile, floating closer. He backed up slightly. "Ah, the antisocial type, huh? Alright I like a challenge. May I please know your name?"

You spent hours trying to get him to speak. Finally you had to show him you were real until he answered. He was quite the odd man. He hadn't meant to summon you, really. He was muttering the words to an old rhyme he read once and it just so happened there was divinities on his desk. "The universe never makes mistakes my dear. Even if it was an accident, that," you said after explaining everything. He was not as sceptical anymore, but it still made you laugh. "So you're telling me the only way I can get you to leave is to fall in love with someone or die?" He questioned. You nodded. There was silence once more, and you were getting the feeling that he was not going to talk unless provoked. "Ok, now that you know a bit about me, let me know your name," you said. He looked up at you, studying you.

"You mean to tell me your basically all powerful... but don't know the name of the person you're going to help?"

...

....

"You know what, you're right. I'm going to suggest that to the gods."

It was hours later, and he wouldn't tell you his game. "Please?? Pleaseee?" You begged, shaking his shoulders. "Fine... it's Takatora Samura," he sighed. You jumped up, cheering. "Finally! Thank you!" You shouted, hugging him. You felt him tense up, and let him go. "Not one for physical contact, hm? It's ok," you said, letting him go. You saw him let out a sigh of relief, and laughed a bit. "Is there something humorous about this situation to you?" He asked. You giggled, nodding your head. "Your reactions my dear," you answered. You saw his ears turn red and you smiled. "I'll find out all about you sooner or later, whether you tell me willingly, or I force it out of you," you said, an innocent smile on your face. He didn't think that was an innocent wording to it. It sounded like a threat, and he assumed it was best to just talk to you. You were quite... pretty. Maybe it was the fact you were basically a goddess, but something about you pulled him to you. Not the fact that you two were literally bonded until you helped him fall in love, but something else. He didn't know what it was yet, but he'd figure it out.

"Following you around is quite tiring you know? Always jumping on and off things. It's quite the impressive feat, but still, you must be tired aren't you darling?" You questioned, floating besides him. "So since I asked you to stop calling me the other nickname, you come up with a new one? You're... a frustratingly stubborn woman," he said quietly. He seemed to notice that people couldn't see you, so he found it best to keep quiet when talking to you. "And you're just a frustrating man, so we're even," you said with a smile. "Can you see other cupids? Like when they're down with other people?" He asked, a sudden thought coming to mind. "Hm? We can't see them, but we can most certainly feel their presence. One of us has been with the same one for nine years. He's... well, she keeps him in line that's for sure," you answered. Your dress seemed to float around with you, bouncing and flowing around as if it were alive itself. He didn't know what to think of this whole situation. It was so bizarre. "So... if I had a person who I thought had a cupid helping them, could you find them?" He asked. "I don't know what you're plan is, but it sounds fun, let's go!" You chirped, pulling on his arm.

"Hmm... oh. Oh, yeah he's definitely got a cupid. That's Ludus's energy alright," you said. He let out a small chuckle, and you looked down at him. "What's so funny Mr. Mystery?" You questioned. "If I'm not mistaken... Ludus is childish or playful love, no?" He asked, hiding a smile. You nodded slowly. "So he has a cupid that's the total opposite of him... who repremands him... and makes him do things that follow a normal moral compass? I find that to be hilarious," he said. You laughed, nodding your head. "I guess that is funny when you look at it that way. What else do you have to do?"

It was currently night time, and honestly, you were bored. He just sat in a chair in his room, reading some book he found. "Hey... hey. Hey! Pay attention!" You shouted. He slowly moved his book down, glancing over at you. "Can we talk about something? Anything is better than silence," you said, sitting on his bed. "I guess... um, tell me about your past?" he asked, shutting the book completely. "Oh... sure!"

"I have no doubt you'll do great! I'll see you in a week?" You said, hugging the man in front of you. It was you husband. You had always supported his musical career, insisting that he would make it one day. "Aw, thank you my dear. And of course, in a week or a bit longer. Goodbye," he assured, waving as he walked off. "Goodbye! I love you!"

All was fine, until news came back that he had been see with another woman. You of course, shook it off. Maybe she was just a friend? But of course, they had been caught doing things no friends would.

"I- I just... I need some time,'' you stuttered, pushing him away softly. "You're mine, don't forget that. You don't need time, you just need me," he said forcefully. "No. We aren't doing this. You cheated on me. Please give me the respect I deserve, and give me time to process what happened. In this moment I am not yours. The moment you decided to be with another, was when I stopped being yours," you stated, running off.

After everything you had supported him through, he really threw you to the side for another woman? You had lived in poor conditions, barely managing to pay rent, supporting him, just for him to do this to you? You had never complained, and always told him he'd be great. He was destined for good things. You always knew it. And this was how he repaid the years of support, love, and loyalty? (As Cardi B. Once said... ahem... "Broke boys don't deserve no pussy, I know that's right.")

It was months later when you got a knock at your door. You turned off the tap, placing the dish you were washing down in the sink. You grabbed the towel besides the sink, drying your hands, while walking to the door. They knocked again and you walked faster shouting, "I'm going!"

You got to the door, unlocking it, and opening it. In front of you was a woman who looked the opposite of you. Every aspect if her was different from you. "Oh... um, hello! Is there anything I can help you with?" You asked. She nodded, "I want you gone."

You stared back in shock, thinking you'd misheard her. "Excuse me?" You questioned. She pushed you back, making you hit your head on the wall. You yelped in pain, falling to the floor. "What the hell?!" You shouted, standing up. "He's so obsessed with you, he misses you, we'll see who he misses when I get rid of you!" She screamed, grabbing a knife from the kitchen. You quickly grabbed the doorknob, getting ready to leave. "No you don't you bitch!" She yelled, running at you with the knife. You opened the door, going to run, before she grabbed the edge of your nightgown, pulling you back. You landed back in your home, and she closed the door, locking it. And thats when you knew you wouldn't survive, as she had blocked every exit.

"I think that's about it. She stabbed me to death, I became a cupid. Oh, and I found out that she was the girl he cheated on me with and blah blah blah. Boring talking about me. What about you?" You finished, waving your hands around. "You are- what? I'm so... he... then she..  You got murdered ?" He stuttered. You nodded, "Yeah,why?" "You're so... so nonchalant about it!" He exclaimed, standing up. "Woah there darling, that's a lot of emotion coming from you right now. You sure you're feeling ok?" You asked, walking towards him. "You're like serious? Like actually? That happened?" He questioned. You were so confused. In the single day you had known him, this was all it took to get a reaction?

"Yeah? Why would I lie about that?" You answered.  He sighed, sitting down on his bed "Well.. he wasn't a good person. How do you help others fall in love when the love you experienced wasn't devine or unconditional?" he asked. You looked down, an floated over to him. "Um... I-... I don't know... it's just what I do. It makes people happy. I like seeing others happy," you murmured, playing with your hands. "But... doesn't it get tiring of constantly seeing others get what you never had? Don't you get angry or sad?" He asked, turning to face you. "What? I've never.... I-... y-you're... you're right..." you whispered, tears filling your eyes. His eyes widened, seeing your tears. "I didn't mean to make you cry, I'm-"

"It's o-ok, I know you didn't mean to. Y- you've actually helped me..."

Helped you? How had he helped you? By going off on an observation based off of what you had told him? It was strange to him that you hadn't thought about it before.

"But at least you're able to look for your 'one true love' or whatever bullshit people make up."

Silence met his ears, something that he usually would be happy about, but this time, not so much.

"Right?"

"You get to fall in love still, right?"

"..."

"...."

"...no..."

He stared at you like you had just told him the world was going to end in the next five seconds. How could the gods be so cruel as to make you suffer through your life, and now your after life? He couldn't believe it. There was no rest for your soul.

"We die if we do... and a devine death means no coming back. No after life can or will take you. Your soul, essance, and being dissappears," you explained. "Has anyone ever tried it?" He questioned, looking away. You shook your head, "No... it's just something Zues told us all. Oh, and Ares. And Dionysus."

"Those boys always messing with you ladies. Oh it infuriates me. Hello my dear Y/N!"

You jumped, grabbing onto Last Boss. "Fear not, it's only me," she said. You looked up, and smiled. "Lady Freyja! It's so wonderful to see you!" You laughed. "Now, what the boys told you are lies. You are most certainly allowed to fall in love. What ridiculous nonsense. I can't believe they'd play a prank so cruel on all of you," she ranted. "I- we are?" You questioned. She nodded. You smiled, and realized how stupid you were. "Thank you, Lady Freyja," you said, bowing to show your gratitude. She laughed, shaking her head. "There's no need for that. Do be careful however. My magic was almost not strong enough to reach you. Wherever this is... it's dangerous. Please be aware."

Weeks passed, and Last Boss had never shown interest in anyone. "Taka, come on, there's got to be someone you like. Anyone. Really. Guys, girls, in betweens. Anything darling," you complained as he sat reading a book. "You want to know what? I have taken interest in someone," he responded. You jumped up in excitement. "Really?! Who?" You exclaimed, jumping up and down.

"You."

Again, he was met with silence. Something, he realized, he only hated when it was coming from you.  "Me? As in... Y/N, cupid of Agape, me?" You questioned. He nodded. Your smile grew wider, and he was becoming worried at your silence.

"It's a good thing I've take interest in you too Samura..."

For the first time in a while, he smiled. A genuine smile. You floated over to him, gently placing a hand on his shoulder.

"I'm glad you accidentally summoned me."

Yay! I finished! So, now vote between the ones that are left which is:

Karube - Storge (the love you share for family)

Chota - Philia (the love you share between friends)

Arisu - Eros (sexual love, lust.)

Hatter - Philautia  (love of self in a positive or negative way)

[pynkhues]

Have you ever found yourself stuck in a rut? How did you manage to get out of it? I just don't know what I'm doing. I've been in school for so long that I'm starting to realize that I'm not interested in that career at all, I feel like a failure . Why did I put forth all that effort only to give up? I just feel so embarrassed . All of my friends are just starting off in their careers, and I'm trapped. Sorry for this . I'm a mess 😅

Oh, gosh, yeah, all the time, anon! You're not a mess at all, I think we all go through phases like that, especially when we've made an investment in a certain path through something like a degree and find that path's maybe not one we want to be on anymore.

I'm going to break out some tips into different sections, just because it's sort of a big topic, but I hope there's something in here that's useful for you.

A Note on Learning and Education

Education and work is something I think about a lot actually. I'm a fairly educated person – I went to a pretty good highschool, got into my first-preference university and then had graduated with a history degree just after my twentieth birthday. I'd also been working in retail and hospitality jobs since I was 13/14, so when I entered the graduate workforce, I was very young, had a pretty useless degree, and about six or seven years of experience already in FOH work.

I was a pretty smart kid, but I really struggled at university. Which was kind of weird, I thought at the time, haha. I did pretty well on exams and assignments, but I realised pretty quickly that university wasn't something that I enjoyed. I learnt that I learn through doing, and so much of my degree wasn't about doing, it was about sitting and trying to swallow enough information to regurgitate later. Honestly, the only reason I think I graduated was the fear of failure that you yourself sound like you might be feeling right now, which is a hard thing to grapple with. So I really get you.

But hey, look, this was ten years ago for me, so here are two things I can tell you for sure:

What your career will look like, and what you feel about your career when you're studying, are not the same thing.

If you decide you don't want to be in that particular career, that's okay. The skills you developed while you were studying still matter and will still be useful to you.

I've never worked in history, but what my degree gave me was analytical research skills, the ability to corroborate evidence and an understanding of the importance of doing so, the ability to write in a variety of styles, to know how to use a style guide, a deeper understanding of the way the political and social intersects with and informs the personal, a foundational knowledge in film and art history, and quite frankly made me a great asset at pub trivia.

Just because I didn't end up in that field, and just because my undergrad was something I didn't overly enjoy, doesn't mean those three years were a waste, and they don't make me a failure either, just like the time you've spent isn't a waste, and the choice you make to pursue it or not won't make you a failure. What it's doing is giving you a lot of skills to take forwards in your life, even if they're not used in as tangible a way as your degree intended.

And just to circle back to point one too - the workforce is really big and really varied, and at university, you're really only seeing a very specific microcosm of any particular field. I can't tell you if your particular industry is going to be for you or not. Maybe it'll be everything you dreamt it would be when you started your degree, maybe you'll hate it, but regardless, this has just been a chapter in your story, it's not the whole book. Hell, it's no one's whole book. The estimate these days is that people change careers five to seven times in their lifetime – if this is your first career, it doesn't mean it'll be your last.

Goalsetting and Planning

OKAY!

Goalsetting and planning isn't for everyone, but I do find it useful, and I think it can help defang your life a bit. Breaking up this big, formless, infinite time in front of you into tangible, do-able goals means that you can really take a bit more control over your day-to-day life that doesn't just keep you moving forwards, but helps you maintain habits that keep you grounded, even when you're in a bit of a rut.

There are tons of tools online to help you, and I'd urge you to have a look around and see which one works for you, but I've also popped the one I use into a Google template spreadsheet for you. It's one I really like, because it breaks up goals into four categories:

What do you want for work?

What do you want for your family?

What do you want for your health?

And what do you want for you?

One of the things I want to stress though is specificity. Vague goals don't get you anywhere and they're immeasurable, right? Like okay - saying you want write more isn't quantifiable, but saying you want to write for three hours a week, or write 500 words a day? That's something you can measure and tick off your list.

For me this year my health goals for instance was to do two pilates classes a week instead of one, and to have two meat-free days a week, while one of my work goals was to finish a new draft of my screenplay, and something I wanted to work on for my family was to start talking to my sister every week again, something we used to do but had stopped after we had a really bad fight in 2020 where we didin't talk for six months.

These are all specific, quantifiable, and important to me. I could've had the broad goal of just 'keep repairing my relationship with my sister', but who knows what that looks like, right? Whereas calling her once a week (even when it was really awkward and tense still, haha) meant she started calling me again too after a few months and we were able to rebuild that relationship in a really meaningful way. It started awkward, but that regularity of scheduled contact matters, and meant that broader, ephemeral goal of repairing our relationship was really met.

Having these goals in four categories is something I find really useful, because even when the work goals are falling down or I'm in a rut, I still have these three other categories that are helping to keep me grounded and focused in other areas of my life. It also means there's always something do-able in my week, even when I'm really struggling. Something as small as not eating meat one day can feel really important when I'm in a rut, as I feel like I'm growing as a person still in this small way that I wanted to be growing three, six, eight months ago when I set the goal in the first place.

Regrounding

But, of course, your question's more specifically about work and career, so let's talk about that.

For starters, I think uncertainty around career paths is extremely normal, especially when you're late in a degree. There's nothing wrong with that. Talking to other people in your field, friends, family, trusted adults is all something that's really valuable and shouldn't be taken for granted.

I think going to things and getting different perspectives really helps too. I'm not sure if you're in Australia, but twice a year, I usually go to Mentor Walks, which is something I recommend to every woman and woman-identifying person in this country. You send in a question and the organisers put you in a group with two other women and an industry mentor and you go for a walk for an hour and talk through your professional worries or career prospects. It's a really wonderful, supportive environment and it's only about twenty bucks.

I'm also in the Creative Women's Circle, and go to a lot of industry events where I get to see talks and hear other perspectives and connect to others in the industry in a way I personally find both practical and inspiring .

Most industries have these sorts of things (in fact, Mentor Walks isn't industry-specific at all, which I really like. The last one I did, it was me, a woman who works at a bank, and a marine biologist, haha). So look some up. Look up mentoring opportunities and workshops outside of university, listen to podcasts and interviews with people in your field and beyond it – find people who can give you a different perspective, and maybe help you identify some goals that you can set yourself that can help you move forwards too.

I hope this is a help, anon! It's a challenging time, both starting your career and doing so in the middle of a global pandemic, and you shouldn't feel at all embarrassed for being in a rut. I'm amazed at anyone who's not right now to be honest, haha. 💖

[lunasxsol]

Love Like This

Bill Skarsgård x Reader

Word Count: 2194

Warnings: Abortion

(A/N: If you do not believe a woman should have a choice on her body then you can fuck off thank you vm. On another note I hope you enjoy this angsty fic. I just had this idea lingering in my mind so it’s here now..)

As I sat in the waiting room dreading my name being called, I looked at the other women that look terrified to go into one of the rooms. Some of them came alone as myself and others came with their significant others or friends. A nurse had brought over a clipboard with some paper I had to sign. I was so nervous I couldn't keep my hands from shaking, I felt like I was going to pass out. Someone took my hand in theirs, I look up to see my best friend Maia. She took me in her arms as I silently cried.

"It's okay, I'm here."

"I thought I was gonna have to go through this alone."

She shook her head taking the clipboard from me, "I would never let you do this alone. Now you sit and calm down and I'll fill this for you okay?" I nodded taking a drink from my water.

Once she finished filling out the forms she handed them back to the nurse and we waited to be called over.

"Y/n L/n"

I got up quickly as did Maia, "You'll be alright, I'll wait here." She gave me a hug and a quick kiss on the head."

"Alright hun lets get you prepped." The nurse said as she took me to one of the operating rooms.

After 15 mins the procedure was finally done, they took me to the recovery room where Maia sat on the couch waiting for me. The nurse, Stella, handed me a cup of water and some pain meds before she went back to her office.

"You okay?" I nodded laying on the bed, Maia took my hand in hers. "He called." I stayed quiet not carrying what he had to say. "He called me too, I didn't pick up."

"Maia, I don't care anymore. I needed him here more than anything and he left me." My eyes started watering once again. "We'd been together for two years and he couldn't respect my one difficult decision. He can go to hell for all I care."

We stayed quiet for a while until the doctor came back and discharged me. Maia took drove us home, I thanked her for being there for me, "I'm going to sleep early today, goodnight Maia." She nodded.

I went into my room shutting the door quickly, taking a seat on my bed and letting myself cry. Maybe if we had gone through this conversation differently then maybe he would've respected my decision.

[Flashback]

I looked at the pregnancy test that read PREGNANT in its bold letters. What the hell was I gonna do? I'm only 19, I'm still enrolled in the uni. I have so much ahead of me. I can't put it aside, I've worked too hard for it.

"Hey babe!" Bill spoke as he walked into my room. "So my parents are having a celebratory dinner for Alexander- hey what's wrong?" He turned me around and I handed him the test. "Hey its alright, we'll figure this out."

I shook my head, "I'm not ready."

He pulled me into a hug sighing, "Neither am I but we can do this. You have me.. till the end."

"No you don't understand.. I'm not ready, I can't have a baby right now, Bill."

"So what you're going to give it up?" I nodded. "You're kidding right?"

"Bill, we aren't ready. Do you not get it?" I threw the pregancy test in the trash brushing past him and taking a seat on my bed. "Your body isn't going to go through the entire change. I am not you. You get to walk around and continue to do your shit while I go to class carrying the child and getting called a whore for opening my legs at a young age. So yes I am going to give it up because I'm too fucking young to have a child."

"Fuck them, you shouldn't give a fuck of what other people say about you. God knows I don't so neither should you."

I chuckled, "My parents sacrificed so much so they can send me here to study at the uni of my choice, I'm not messing it up because of our fuck up."

"So what our child is a fuck up now?" He was red with anger.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean it that way but if you loved me you would respect my decision."

"I love you (Y/n but I'm sorry, I don't agree with it. So whatever you're thinking of doing to our 'fuck up' you can do it alone." He left slamming the door loudly leaving me completely alone.

[End of flashback]

I sat up turning the tv on to have some sort of background noise. There was a knock at my door I groaned not wanting to see Maia or anyone at the moment. "Maia I'm okay, I just want to sleep."

The door was opened and a tall figure had walked in.

"Hey."

"Get out."

"I'm sorry."

"Get the fuck out." He didn't listen and instead kept coming closer. "Bill seriously get the fuck out."

"I need to talk to you."

I chuckled, "Well if it's to try and change my mind you can kindly fuck off cause the procedures done and so are we."

"I know it's done and I should've been there." I finally looked up at him his eyes sunken and red. "I'm sorry, I should have respected your decision because it's your body. I was just happy that we were gonna have a baby. I thought you wanted one."

"I did, I do, just not now. Not till I was settled." He nodded both our eyes brimming with tears. "Bill I need a break, a really long break. You fucked up and I-I don't know anymore. Look I'm 19 you're 26, I don't want kids till I'm like 30 or maybe never I don't know. And well with the way you reacted it's evident you want kids now. I knew this relationship wasn't gonna last."

"Hey, hey, I do want kids but I can wait. Just don't-don't leave, please." He took my hand in his but I quickly moved it away.

I sighed now full on crying, "I'm sorry Bill but this isn't gonna work out. You can find someone your age that you can settle down with now. I still have years before I'll even remotely be sure if I want kids. By then you'll be in your mid 30s, which is besides the point but what if I don't want kids what will you do then?" He shrugged his shoulders crying silently. "I love you Bill but we can't be together anymore."

He got up pressing a lingering kiss on my forehead, "I'm sorry."

***

3 years later

Today was finally moving day. I had finished my studies in New York and I was moving back down to LA. My parents were a bit against it since we had lived there years ago but they hated it there but I loved it. I was moving down by the beach areas. Maia was staying here with her fiancé.

"Well Ms. those are the last of your boxes." I handed the movers a decent tip and they went on their way.

I turned to Maia as she was already getting emotional, "Hey no crying, it's bad for the baby."

She chuckled pulling me in for a tight hug, "Hey me and Rosalie are gonna miss you."

I pulled away immediately in shock, "it's a girl?" She nodded causing me to shriek in excitement. Tyler came into the room and I jumped on him. "Congrats!"

"We were actually wondering if you would like to organize the baby shower for us." Tyler spoke.

"Yes of course!"

"We wanted to do it in 4 months. Closer to her due date."

"Once I get everything situated in LA I'll get things prepped and fly back here to organize everything!"

There was a honk outside of our house.

"Well guys I will see you in 4 months!" I hugged them both goodbye and grabbed my suitcase getting into the taxi.

***

2 weeks later

I was finally getting the finishing touches to my new house down. I still had a bit of work left but everything was mostly good to go. Now I currently sat in my living room going through a couple of designs for tomorrow's meeting. With the help of one of my close celebrity friends he got me a job with Leah Valderia a famous singer from London. She wanted help with her house and of course I said yes. This could be a great opportunity for my interior design career.

It was getting late and I decided to call it a night. I would show her the designs I had and maybe go shopping with her for some of the things.

The next morning I made sure to wake up early. I took a quick shower to calm my nerves. For my outfit I decided on a corduroy skirt that was a creamy chocolate color and a black turtle neck that fit perfectly. I also went with a dark grey oversized blazer that was just an inch longer than my skirt, for shoes I went with some heeled ankle boots. I did some light makeup and left my hair in its regular straight style. I added just some thin gold necklaces just to bring the whole outfit together. I looked at the time and grabbed my purse and work folders quickly heading out of my house. Before leaving the lot I sent a quick text to Leah letting her know I was on my way.

The traffic to her mansion was horrible to say the least. Luckily I made it on time, I parked my car on the curb and jogged to her door. "Great you're here, please come in!"

Looking around I could definitely see some potential for this beautiful home, "So Y/n I'm so excited you're here. I'm hoping you can bring my vision to life!" We took a seat in her office and she opened her laptop sliding it towards me. She had quite the vision. "I will sure try."

We were in her office for two hours, let's just say she is completely indecisive about what she wants to do with this place. So beautiful and so much potential only her vision was nothing like mine. "So we can definitely do what you want to do and we can also add some color maybe open up these curtains here as well just to get some light and more open space."

"Great! Let me show you the nursery so you can kind of get an idea of what we can with it. This baby will be here in 3 months need to have it done before anything else."

"What are you having?"

"A girl! I'm so excited, I hope one day you get to experience how beautiful it is to carry a life."

I smiled not really knowing what to say I just nodded, "Hey honey, I'm home, brought the- Y/n?"

"Bill?"

"You guys know each other?"

"We-"

"I-"

"We dated years ago."

"Oh?" Leah looked down. "Is she?" Bill only nodded.

"I'm sorry, I'm gonna go. I can send you an email of other designers if-"

Leah shook her head, "No I love your work, that's why I called in for you. This thing you and Bill had is in the past so I would still like to work with you if that's alright."

I nodded, "Well I'll email you some of the ideas I have then we can get started immediately. I'll be back in a week?"

"Perfect."

"Well I'll see you Leah, beautiful house you have here."

Bill set his things down, "I'll walk her out." Leah only nodded.

My car was only a block away but as we walked it felt like it was miles away. "Congratulations." I broke the silence.

"Thank you." He smiled.

"I told you, you would find someone to make you happy. Look at you, you're gonna have a baby."

"Yeah, I'm really happy, but I'm still really sorry about what happened between you and I. I'm sorry we didn't work out and I'm sorry I wasn't there when you needed me the most. I should have been there for you."

I sighed trying not to cry, "It was a bit traumatizing, having the procedure done is weird and horrible but it had to be done. I don't think I would've been happy if we went through with the pregnancy. I never want to be resentful towards a kid that wasn't at fault you know." He nodded. "I went to therapy after we broke up, got back on my feet and now I'm okay with it. I'm happy for you and happy that you're with someone that can give you the life you deserve."

He pulled me in for a hug giving me a kiss on the forehead, "I love you Bill Skarsgård."

"I love you too Y/n L/n and I wish you nothing but the best."

[21stcenturycyclops]

21st Century Cyclops - Pilot

Author’s Note: I decided to begin writing Helle’s story. I hope you all enjoy the first chapter! If you like shows like Darling in the Franxx, Tokyo Ghoul, My Hero Academia, or Fairytail, I think you’ll enjoy where 21st Century Cyclops is headed!

There's three harsh, short raps on the door. Helle wakes up groggily, and clicks her phone next to her bed.

3:37 AM....what could anyone possibly want right now? Maybe I dreamt it?

Helle begins to lay her head back onto her pillow, but 3 more aggressive knocks sound against the door. Helle gets up with the lights still off, and throws on the pair of shorts next to her bed. She looks into the peephole to see who's knocking. There's 3 men in suits with dark, black sunglasses.

That's weird. Is it someone from the school?

Helle opens the door reluctantly, the cold of the handle startling against her fingers.

"Can I help you?" She surveys the men carefully, although her head is still groggy from just rolling out of bed - A troll, an elf, and a half-giant.

What could they want with me?

"Are you Helle Brand?" The troll asked sternly.

Helle shifted from foot to foot uncomfortably, "Yeah."

"We're from the Mil Government Secret Military Units." The troll explained, "And we'd like to have a word with you."

Helle's eye widened, and she looked at the men dumbfounded. "The what?"

"Please, come with us." The troll gestured towards the hallway. Helle wasn't sure if she should go. They hadn't shown any identification, and how could she even verify something like "Mil Government Secret Military Unit" IDs as legit? Helle felt wide awake now.

"Can I see some ID or something?" Helle asked, still very skeptical of the men. They each pulled out IDs, which sure enough said what they claimed to be. She examined one of the IDs closely. She found the official seal of the president. It was only used on a handful of documents, and it looked shockingly real.

"Let me grab my coat." Helle shut the door and turned her light on. She grabbed a jacket and put her keys that had a pink canister of pepper spray on it. She turned and opened the door, and flicked her light off.

"Ready to go, Ms. Brand?" The troll, still the only one to talk up to this point, asked.

"Yeah." Helle followed them out, still weary of the situation, but worried about what would happen if she evaded the government. She got in a very nice, very new looking black SUV, along with the three men. She didn't really know where they were taking her, and they were relatively silent. After about 5 minutes, Helle spoke up.

"Can I know what's going on now?"

This time, the half-giant answered. "An unknown entity has touched base on Mil. We have reason to believe they are hostile, and we are building a team to combat them."

Helle scoffed, "This is some sort of joke, that's ridiculous!"

"It's not," The half-giant pulled out a tablet, and went to a folder of documents, then proceeded to pull up a video, "Here, take a look for yourself."

The video showed a weird, pod-like vehicle. A door opened, and strange, shadowy beings stepped out. They said something, but it was in an indiscernible language. Still, it seemed to insane to be true.

"Okay, why would you even want me? I'm just a college student." Helle handed the tablet back, and had her other hand firmly in her pocket, gripped to her pepper spray.

"Cyclops are rare nowadays," the Half-Giant stated, "And your natural athletic abilities, as well as heightened strength and resilience make you a much needed component for this team."

"But I don't fight! Just because my species has some natural tendencies, doesn't mean I'm cut out for a job like this!"

"You'll learn. You were specifically chosen." The half-giant said, rather finally.

They drove for maybe an hour, and finally pulled up to a building hidden in the woods. It was more of a facility, and not so much a building. Somehow, such a facility made Helle more sure that these guys were legitimate. They led her inside, swiping a key card at the door. They sat her down in a sterile, white room, with a couple other people her age. She looked around. They all looked as scared and confused as she felt. She scanned each of them - two half-giants, a girl and a guy, a fairy, and an elf. Helle sat down among them.

"So, do you guys know what's going on?" Helle asked, as the silence was too nervewracking.

"Probably nothing more than you." The female Half-Giant said.

The half-giants were the only two as tall as Helle in the group. They were probably both around 7'5" - 7'8", and Helle was about 6'8". The elf was probably around 5'7", and the fairy couldn't be anymore than 5'0".

"What're your names?" The fairy looked around at everyone.

"Miles." The male half-giant answered.

"Connie." The female half-giant said.

"I'm Orion." The elf gave a weak half-smile.

"Helle. And what about you?"

"Hina." The fairy responded.

The group just sat in silence, waiting for the men in black to return and give them more information. Helle yawned, and then the elf yawned as well. The adrenaline was probably wearing off for everyone. It had to be around 5 AM. Luckily, it was a Friday night, so at least Helle didn't have to wake up for classes in the morning.

Can "The Different" really be real? Helle thought. Am I really being recruited into a military squad to try and defeat some mysterious enemy?

A woman in a commander's uniform opened the door, and looked at the group before her.

"I'm General Sakura Marshall. I'm sure you're all very confused right now." She said. The group just looked up at her with wide eyes. She didn't wait for any verbal responses, and continued speaking, "An entity has touched base, not far from here. We have dubbed them "The Different" for organizational purposes. We hope that the general population will never know of these beings, and that's where you five come in. Each of you was selected based on a variety of merits. Intelligence, athletic ability, strength, speed, and magical capability. Based on our calculations, and excluding any training you've ever had, we have concluded that you five are the most physically capable to take on the enemy, and to yield the Trinkets, weapons with extraordinary power that we are tailoring to each of you. You will begin training tomorrow morning, so you're welcome to sleep here tonight. You-"

"I'm sorry, General Marshall, but, I have a life. I'm in college. I want to have a career." Helle said, irritation in her voice.

"Are you expecting us to just quit our lives?" Miles asked.

"No, no, of course not." General Marshall waved her hand dismissively, "This mission's success relies on secrecy. You will begin with training in the evenings on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and remain here from Friday evening to Sunday morning every other weekend. Other than that, you'll carry on life as usual. The Different has been completely dormant, so until they begin showing signs of activity, your presence isn't constantly needed. However, it's possible we will find ourselves in an all out war. If that happens, we expect your full dedication. Until then, we need you to live your lives as normal. We will provide training garments for you, and set up rooms here for you, since you'll be spending nights here every once in awhile."

"None of us have agreed to this!" Orion furrowed their brows. "What makes you think we will?"

"Our hope is that you will see why we are in need of the five of you, Orion." General Marshall handed folders to everyone, "Please, look through these folders. We need you. This is an official plea for your aid."

The group read through them carefully, and there was the sound of nothing but shifting papers for several minutes.

Connie sighed, "I'm in."

"Me too." Orion followed.

"Something tells me our lives are about to drastically change." Miles laughed, although it came out as hollow.

Hina and Helle glanced at one another, still unsure of the situation. It still all seemed so impossible, like they would wake up any moment.

"Let's do this." Helle said, but instead of sounding inspiring and excited, it only sounded defeated.

"Yeah." Hina said meekly.

"We thank you." General Marshall bowed her head, "Please, let us show you to your rooms. Because we picked you up so late in the night, we won't wake you until around 10 AM. After that, be ready to begin your training."

Men in black showed the group to their rooms. Helle was surprised by how large the room was. There was a large, king-sized bed, with white bedding. If Helle turned off the lights, she could pretend she was sleeping in a hotel, and not a government facility. She slipped on the pajamas the facility provided, and climbed into the giant white bed.

My life is never going to be the same. Was the last thing Helle thought before drifting off to sleep.