#'you're not gonna want your dinner'

[fryday]

I think about this a lot but they definitely obviously are considerably different off camera and I think the closest we got to seeing that is not all the current videos but the final google feud with all the whining and play fighting and general dumbassery

hugely agree. i generally have a case to make for videos in which they are slightly tired / low energy for whatever reason - why? because the walls lower!! when they just don't have it in them to lean into being DnP™️, they just become dnp. the people, the best friends, the lovers, etc. i loooove the final google feud, and i loooove the pizza mukbang video, for this same reason.

(edit: more recently i would say the sisyphus video had very much this same vibe. some exceptional softness + whining going on in that video)

[dangenderenvy]

they're so married. the whole squashie thing. marriage.

[lightseoul]

no thoughts brain empty except for retired househusband!bakugou waiting for you to get home from work :(

[autumn-applepie]

University ever pushes you so low you have to go buy a couple of beers? /srs/neg

I'm gonna vent in the tags for a moment humor me for once /gen

[nerdyfangirlingbooks]

Every now and then I remember the times I would mention to my flatmate that I was thinking of buying myself something reasonably expensive (that I had been eyeing up for months and had budgeted for) and she'd tell me that I shouldn't spend that much money on something I didn't need and it would be stupid etc etc while she regularly impulse bought things that cost at least as much and she would use once (while complaining that she was under a lot of financial stress and couldn't afford <$3/week for 2 months for a rental washing machine when ours broke). She is... perhaps not my first call for financial advice

[troglobite]

.

[msommers]

MAEVE SOMMERS wayhaven chronicles au

[templates]

[essektheylyss]

Okay, this book draft is not going as smoothly as fic does, natch, but I have finally gotten to a point where I'm able to identify which dominoes I've set up need to fall to make the ending come together, and that is such a goddamn relief.

[hella1975]

update on The Horrors Date: we are now meeting maybe tuesday? because he's a third year and he's got something to do with his dissertation due monday and that's definitely why he couldn't meet at the time i gave him there's no other reason why he'd want to meet in the evening at his house without a time limit as opposed to the afternoon like i said. i am not overthinking this on the contrary im being very optimistic about this entire thing

[mythvoiced]

hey I was just hanging and I saw u and I wanted to come in and tell you're wonderful

I WAS GONNA WRITE YOU AND NOW YOU STOLE MY THUNDER well, that only means now I have to yell all these things about you here where everybody can see, sO REMEMBER how you followed me first? Let me tell you why I'm mentioning this, well, the reason I'm mentioning this Ami, is because when I saw the notification that YOU had followed me, all brain capacity ceased. All at once. I know we're all sexy people who don't just follow for follow, which meant that you, incredible Ami, had peeked at my lil blog and said 'yeah, I wanna write with that', and that was INSANE for me because I saw you writing and interacting with Alex for SO LONG that you were almost already a huge deal on m'dash, yknow~ So I've seen the way you write and I saw how COOL you are, like, the energy and the fun of your edits with your dynamics with Alex, AND I'D TOLD M'SELF, alright, one day I'm gonna yeet m'self at Ami and see if mayhaps I can meet Amelia up close AND THEN YOU BEAT ME TO IT, AND THAT WAS SO GREAT I GOT SO EXCITED!! Because Amelia is so inSANELy developed and I just can't get enough of peeking at your ooc posts and seeing how much you love your chaos gremlin and it's just SO NEAT, your presence on dash, IMMACULATE, so I've officially decided that I'm thinking of you as one of the REAL ONES now and as such, expect me to be an absolute nuisance of headcanon asks and yelling~

[fryday]

it's the way "you're not gonna want your dinner" was 110% an offscreen interaction. dan's voice went super quiet (only directed to phil, not for the mic to pick up). his light disappointment/admonishment/fondness was totally genuine, not played up, and was obviously addressing something they've been through a thousand times before (but again, this was neither explained nor exaggerated - it wasn't delivered for the audience's sake). and then phil's immediate, unbothered "i am" while staring blankly into space before he looked at the camera and turned it into the disappointed grandma joke (@manchesterau pointed this out!). we witnessed a full, offscreen, completely domestic moment between them and how blessed are we

[thegempage]

eeeuuuuggghhh i'm gonna bitch in the tags a bit bcus this isn't like. serious enough to put more effort into it than that but i also don't want it to sit in my brain.

[tonycries]

No, husband!Nanami doesn't want kids right now - not when you're both at the height of your careers and your relationship. Not even when those older ladies at the office titter and show off their young ones to him.

No, husband!Nanami doesn't want kids right now when that lost little girl at the park comes up to the two of you. Hugging onto your dress while frantically calling you mama - waving her chubby fingers at the two of you when you finally hand her off to her mother.

No, husband!Nanami doesn't want kids right now no matter what your parents have been teasing him about. Just-so-happening to bring out those tucked-away baby albums of you whenever you both came over for dinner. And if he took a few photos of the adorable pictures then, well, doesn't mean he wants kids right now, right? Right?

No, husband!Nanami doesn't admit he wants kids - not even he's got you folded in half like a ragdoll beneath him. In the meanest mating press, cock so swollen and sloppy as he fucks his seed into you for the fifth time that night. Two fingers come to pool the cum dribbling out the side of your poor pussy, plugging the mess back in as he whispers, "My love...you're gonna give me a daughter, right?"

[lxnarphase]

━━ ❝ the way of the househusband ❞

☾₊‧⁺...cw : househusband!fushiguro toji x fem!reader, you are megumi's mom, flirting, playful banter, just overall silly and cute domestic life

☾₊‧⁺...lunar's note : just some simple lil toji hcs of him as a househusband! i need some sweet stuff of him without a lot of sexual stuff in it bc let's be real, in a domestic setting he's probably just a big clingy and mildly annoying bear husband

f. toji is never going to complain about being the one staying home, watching over the little gremlin that is megumi. he's got his own ways of bringing in money with that friend of his, shiu, but he's more than content to being the one in the frilly pink apron, cooking for you and the lil' man.

toji didn’t ever expect to get married, especially after how he was treated as a zenin. he didn't know much about love or how to connect with people, let alone you. but when you handed his ass to him with no struggle and a pretty smile on your face at the gym, he knew he wanted you. two years later and a shit load of aggressive flirting, toji ends up with you as his spouse and he wouldn't have it any other way.

so imagine toji's surprise when he's genuinely excited when you tell him your pregnant. he's excited but scared. him? a father? there's no way in hell he has any idea what to do, his own father was nothing but a piece of shit...so what if he turns out like him? but the moment you pop that big headed little fucker out of you, toji can't help but grin, that excitement of being a father and creating memories with this tiny little thing erasing all his fears.

whenever you come home from work, toji's usually in the living room with little megumi, who forced him to take part in the exercise part of his favorite kids show. you don't know how megumi, your one year old baby who still talked in little babbles, forced his massive giant of a father who could kill a man with a look to do 'exercise for baby,' but you know better than to question it when you see the two touching their toes in front of the tv.

sometimes, he's in the kitchen, however, wearing that 'kiss the cook' apron you got for his birthday. toji always wraps an arm around your waist and pulls you into a kiss, muttering a 'welcome home’ against your lips before poking your side and going back to what he was doing, proud grin on his face at the little screech he gets from you.

he's started to get better at dodging your hands when you go to poke him back, skirting around the table before going to scoop megumi up. “you would never do such an act in front of 'gumi, would you? what if he starts going around poking girls in their sides, hm? then i'll have to explain to his teacher that his mama can't keep 'er hands to herself.”

toji's got you there...so you back off, opting to press a kiss to babygumi’s little forehead, taking him from your husband’s arms when he makes grabby hands at you. you savor the betrayed look on toji's face, sticking your tongue out at him. he scoffs, rolling his eyes before going back to make sure dinner wasn’t burnt. he’ll get you back for stealing his son from him.

despite what people might think, there’s not really a 'dominant' person in the relationship. when together, the two of you give off some of the most intimidating vibes because of the sheer power the both of you carry. it's not even put off by little megumi, because if he notices his parents looking at you in disgust, he's gonna give you one that's even worse.

toji will never forget the day the three of you went to the grocery store, him in his usual black t-shirt and grey sweatpants, you in one of those same shirts and leggings with megumi in the kiddie seat in the shopping cart, eating from the little snack pack toji made for him. toji swears he walked away for three fucking seconds, and he came back to some...fucker getting ready to chat you up. it’s no surprise anyone that he gets pissed, ready to storm over there and make it clear you're taken.

however, it's clear you don't need him to step in, and damn, you look...really hot telling this dude off, angrily flashing your ring when he wouldn't back off. god, he wishes he could marry you again. toji doesn’t even know what you told the guy, and he's tempted to playfully ask megumi what happened, knowing his lil' man would try to respond in babbles and coos.

“he said you crawled out from the trash, toj, i can't stand for that! he could’ve done you some justice and said you crawled out of the deepest pits of hell, so I had to educate him on that. besides, he called you my boyfriend and I almost punched his face.”  “yeah? hm, i’m glad you didn’t, babe, we don’t want to get kicked out the store.”  “i don’t know, i think an imprint of my ring in his forehead would get the message across.”  “well, next time, how about we just kiss like we haven't seen each other in 15 years? not a fan of showing out to some dude, but i'd do it for you, sweetheart.”  “mmn!”  “right, lil' man? mama's so mean t' me, it's a good idea.”  “gumiiii, you're supposed to be on my side!”

occassionally, when you're at work, toji'll just talk to megumi, the little one nice and comfy on his chest.

one habit he'll never get out of is randomly calling you throughout the day when he's particularly bored and missing you. if you don't answer, toji will just leave you a message, usually about how badly he wants you to come home, groaning about how tired he is but he can't sleep without you in his arms, without you playing with his hair until he falls asleep. he's so in love with you, it's almost makes you dizzy.

you'll never forget the day you come home to toji and baby megumi in the front yard, crouched down around...something. parking in the driveway, you make your way over and see what they're looking at. it's...a kitten and a puppy, two tiny little things playfighting with each other. neither one of them say anything, just looking at the two creatures. you sigh, knowing exactly what this means.

"...give them appropriate names and make vet appointments. we aren't naming the dog 'hot dog' and we aren't naming the cat 'kitten'." "i told you it would work, lil' man."

all rights reserved © lxnarphase | do not repost, copy, translate, or alter my work

[bixiaoshi]

my mom came into my room n said "let's make dumplings tomorrow" which i asked if she's gonna leave me on my own making them and she said yes 😭

[carebearbussy]

ᥫ᭡ thinking about heian era! sukuna having a heavy breeding kink, seemingly out of nowhere.

you bring up a mere idea at dinner, the conversation quickly turning normal, to you bringing up an idea he had never given a second thought to.

"do you ever want kids with me, 'kuna?"

you would ask him, innocently enough, a sickeningly sweet tone hidden beneath your words. but you would already know the answer to this question. he would look up at you, then back down at his food, annoyance pondering his mind. eating a slab of salmon sashimi, he took a bite, chewing slow enough to hint at his potential answer. placing down his chopsticks, he would look back up at you, scoffing to himself at your foolish inquiry.

"those small, annoying humans that require too much attention for their own good? no thank you, i have better things to attend to."

he says, focusing on the meal before him. but his thoughts soon get the best of him. and now that he thinks about it, he will need an heir eventually. and not only that, but what would you be like? as a mother specifically. you would require more attention than most of the time. which was something he secretly enjoyed indulging in, despite his negative reasoning towards infants. how would you look?

you would be more swollen than usual, you stomach would grow larger by day, your breasts will most definitely become more full by the day. the bigger picture, which was you, enticed him in a way. something about seeing you round with his child really had his head going.

and so thats how you ended up here, you knees tightly locked against your stomach, as sukuna absolutely plows into your already stuffed cunt.

this was the seventh time? eighth time? at this point, you couldn't keep track. but he had came wayyyy too many times more than an average man should be able to. it was excruciating, really, the whimpers leaving your mouth, his hands bringing your knees closer to your chest with every move of his hips.

his seed was leaking out of you, glop by glop, dripping down your bottom even more, as he kept going harder and rougher. splashes of your juices paired with his cum stained the bed, the squelching of your pussy becoming deafening with every smack of his heavy balls against the rim of your ass. and the tight grip he had on your locks wasn't helping his case.

"hah, you're gonna give your king his offspring? yeah? r' you gonna be a good little mother f'me? make me an heir?"

he asks, your head barely able to focus on anything other than trying to stay sane. you felt sooo full, but this apparently wasn't enough for sukuna, or his heavy urges to breed your sloppy cunt. you nod eagerly, not wanting him to go any harder than he already has. but with the way he kept abusing your womb, it seemed like you were enjoying it, as sukuna relishes in your facial expression, your eyes rolling back, your mouth hung open wide enough to stuff two of his free fingers in.

"you'd be such a good mother, so obedient too. you wanted to rile me up, didn't you? i'll give you what you want, woman."

moaning into his fingers, you swirl your tongue around his digits, making him hum contently. you try to focus your vision onto his eyes, but the way he pushed his chest further into yours, had you practically cross eyed. hitting a new angle, you felt yourself completely let go, officially adding onto your list of orgasms you had previously had that night.

he released his fingers from your mouth, a coat of your saliva stringing upon release. he ceases to pull out of you, instead letting himself nuzzle nicely into your warmth, releasing yet again inside of you, earning a whine of complaint on your behalf. he playfully slaps your cheek with his wet hand, trailing it down to your pussy, playing in the ring of his semen around his cock. you squirm slightly, as you watch him then bring his cum coated fingers up to your mouth, pushing them back inside your mouth, making you taste his seed, some of his cum pooling around your lips.

"does that taste good? i bet it does, since you seem to love my seed so much. i cant wait to see you so full, besides from right now, of course."