#(+ just burn out on that game as I'd been in the fandom for over a year)

[if-loki-was-a-fox]

It's so strange to think back on my pre-mcyt era because I really had no idea what mcyt was. I thought it was all just speed running and pvping, generally just y'know. Boring sweaty gamer stuff. And as such I fully discounted it as something I wouldn't be interested in, as someone who has never cared about sports.

... Then one day I saw the phrase Minecraft Roleplay and some mentions of Characters, and bam! I've been here ever since

[myfruitlessthorns]

𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐝𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐧𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬, 𝐅𝐎𝐌𝐎 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥-𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐞𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐬

as an 18-year-old, 2006 baby, most of my fandoms were in their prime long before i was even cognisant. i mean, merlin had finished by the time i had just started school, superwholock was thriving away as i obliviously flicked from the ludicrous image of matt smith dancing away in the tardis to sherlock babbling away to john on the bbc, and even by the time i'd hit secondary school, i was left with the tail ends of pretty little liars. i can just remember so desperately binging the entire show at the ripe age of 11, just to catch the shitty season finale and exactly on time for the enraged twitter afterparty. living like this, i've somewhat made peace with the fact that i am a sort of fangirl-archaeologist, sifting away happily through the dusty ruins of once great and mighty fandoms and finding the occasional relic hidden - fantastically written fanfiction.net smut hidden amidst the rubble of mid 2010s jhutch whistle edits.

however, bitter as i am, nothing - and i repeat - *nothing* has given me such enraging, all consuming FOMO as the ballad of songbirds and snakes. 

picture the scene. its 2020. a young, 14-year-old tisha has just finished the hunger games trilogy. she adores it, and to her luck, the brilliant suzanne collins has decidedly published a prequel just as she tucks mockingjay away, back into her bookshelf. perfect timing, right? i just remember the feeling of 'i cant wait to read it!' battling away with 'except it's covid so i cant' and one of my friends had pre-ordered it anyway, so i was determined to get my hands on a copy as soon as lockdown was over. 

except, after lockdown finished, came gcses and after gcses finished came a levels and it was then, amidst personal statements and entrance exams and oxbridge applications that *it* came out. the ballad of songbirds and snakes: the fucking film. i was long out of my hunger games phase; i dont think i considered even quickly flicking through the novel before going to the theatres. im a purist like that - book before film always - but i just didnt have time to read it and so, completely oblivious to the fact that i was alive and concious, missing the hunger games renaissance when every other teenager was obsessing over tom blyth and making fan edits of rachel zegler and listening to the soundtrack on repeat, i decided to save the book till after a levels.

and what a fucking mistake. 

the fact that i could’ve revelled in the prime of tbosas fandom in live time and been there at its peak!!! and that i fucking missed it???? everyone i knew watching that masterpiece play out in theatres and now, i have to sit and listen to you all reminiscing about november 2023 not knowing what that felt like, envying the fyp full of coriolanus snow edits and the fresh off the cut late night interviews with the cast that you all got to experience. in fact, the movie has aged just enough to be declared a ‘phase’ by everyone that was there in at its peak. and its driving me up the wall, because the worst part of all this is i have no one to talk to share my burning obsession with, knowing well, that 11 months ago, half the internet would’ve happily shared it with me.

so please, tbosas fans, if there are any of you still active, if you empathise with the plight of listening to ‘cant catch me now’ on repeat whilst pretending to be lucy gray - lets be mutuals. please.

-a girl going slightly insane.

(on a side note, i have sincerely learnt from my mistakes and will not, by ANY means, be leaving sunrise on the reaping to the last minute. i just hope its as good as tbosas!!!! in suzanne collins, we trust!)

[eyesore-boi]

You think that you're alone but

We are waiting for you every night...

You're mine.

Close ups and other stuff below!

...so....10 years, huh?

I cannot understate how much FNaF means to me in my life, and yeah...know that sounds a b i t much considering it's the funny har har bear games, but lemme explain-

Truth is, i was actually terrified of FNaF when it first came out! I remember my first introduction to it was when i was having a sleepover at my friend's place and he was both playing and watching other people play the first game, and when i was watching it with him, i got scared and tried to avoid the game as much as i could, even claiming to hate the game despite just knowing the first game. I was young and was prone to sheltering myself from stuff i didn't understand, and that being the first scary game i've ever seen caused that reaction, but over time...that changed.

It happened when i was watching YT and clicked on a comic dub i never seen before, thinking it was an AU for a fandom i was in (probably Undertale i dunno), but lo and behold, it was actually a fandub/animatic for the missing kids incident, and that...peaked my interest. I got curious on how this scary game actually had an interesting story to it and not just some game that goes boo. So, soon after that, i decided to look up simply "FNaF Story", found the Game Theory videos, and...the rest is history.

I was amazed and hooked, got invested in how the games explained the story in ways i've never seen before, got excited when i saw everything click together in real time, and pair that with how i got into the series r i g h t when Sister Location came out, arguably when the lore really started to kick off, i knew there was no going back now. I stuck with the series since. I watched all the animatics and dubs, listened to all the songs, tried drawing the characters, made OC's, and even talked to other people about this franchise.

And now look- Not gonna pretened this whole time it's been sunshine and (Chica's) rainbows, especially in recent times. The drop off SB caused, the lore getting more and more complicated and convoluted, the divide between older and newer fans, being the founder of Mascot Horror (for every Poppy Playtime there i s a Garten of Ban Ban) and course the IRL drama, but in all seriousness...i still wouldn't trade it for anything.

FNaF, this series, is my very first experience connecting me with a community like this, both good and bad, helping me understand how to properly enjoy media and even learn/take things from it, and i think without it i wouldn't be in the fandoms i'd be in now. The scary, horror ones, the niche, hard to find ones, story driven, character rich, and of course...more importantly...getting me into Markiplier, which further influenced the "outside the box" kind of thinking cause my g o d for these two stories you need too-

And speaking of, because of those two stories, it lead to me branching out more creativily and even creating my own webcomic for an AU combining both of them, so regardless on how that'll go, i'm just glad this series has influenced me enough to create something for others to see, since that's all i ever want to give.

But really, this franchise will forever be with me, and though i don't always agree with all of it (i haven't read any of the books in y e a r s and i refuse to do so), it only makes some of the stuff it does do right completely worth it (like the movie, peak cinema), and for where ever this bear shaped train is going next, well, i'll be here for the ride for all of it. No matter how many burning buildings it goes through.

...oh and um- Right yeah. The actual art piece. Uh....it crashed multiple times when drawing it. It's even a miracle i was able to export it. I can't even open it up anymore. So even if i wanted to change anything about it, i c a n 't -

But still pretty happy with how it came together! Was run drawing these robos, some being kinda redraws from the past, while other's i've n e v e r drawn before, so that was interesting! But still, tried to draw the "main character" so to say from each of the main FNaF games, and just kinda be...walking along through the series, nothing too deep or complex, but still interesting enough! ....unlike the fnaf storyline cause g o d how many restaurants wERE THEIR S C O T T -

But for real this is going long enough, so ima head out and do my own FNaF related things thay you don't need to worry about shush *commits arson*

HAPPY 10TH FNAF BIRTHDAY EVERYBODY!! >:DD

[m2jay]

Soul Touch [Ford x OC]

Here's a little preview of what's in the story. Thanks to the release of "The Book of Bill" and the dating sim game "Swooning Over Stans," I think it was time for me to contribute to the Gravity Falls fandom and write a fanfic. Here's a part of it:

◬◬Bill's POV◬◬

"A X O L O T L! My time has come to burn! I invoke the ancient power that I may return."

        To think that using the last of my powers in Stanley's mind would lead me to this. That damn con artist is really going to get it this time. As I invoked the strength I had left inside, I managed to survive within the cosmos life other deities are able to do. Banished to a realm amongst the stars, I was met with the AXOLOTL. Though soothing of a presence, it's not my style.

        I crave chaos and destruction, one that leaves me with a good laugh. Seeing the terror amongst humans is absolutely amusing, and it's fun to see how far they'll go for their own selfish desires. They live in a meaningless way. There's nothing good about the world they fight so hard to go on in. Why do they fight so hard for a life that just ultimately has so much struggle in the end? Having infinite power is where it's really at. They're all too stupid to understand.

        The party had stopped. Time was dead and meaning had no meaning. Existence was upside-down and I reigned supreme briefly. I had it all. 

        Everything was in my grasp, even ol' Fordsy too. The fact that I was outsmarted by his lesser half is an absolute embarrassment to my existence. It's not fair, and I will get him back, along with the whole damn Pines family. They will get what's coming to them once I get out.

        I've been locked away in Theraprism in Dimension #5150. It's a neutral zone that's outside of time. If I were stronger, I'd have destroyed this useless place. I'm tired of pretending to be something I'm not in order to get out of here.

        I had many crimes against reality against me. I've done memory laundering, breaking and entering the fabric of space-time, chrono-infanti-regicide, multilevel  marketing, psychic torture, the "2nd-Dimension Incident," and Weirdmageddon. Personally, I don't think this is all that bad to keep me locked up in one of the highest wellness centers of space and time.

        People don't change, not even GODS. Wanna know how to get out of a mental ward, kid? It's faking it. You tell them what they want to hear. You mask everything. Don't be your true self. Trust no one.

        My power isn't as strong as the AXOLOTL, but I still got it. I've managed to fabricate a book that will go out into the Pine's family's dimension. I call it "The Book of Bill." Pretty clever, right? It's pretty impressive if I do say so myself.

        If anything, of all gods, why am I here? Isn't there some Christian entity or something that went against the God or whatever. If anything, why not blame all my atrocities on that guy, huh? Don't a lot of people do that anyways to get away with things? I mean seriously, I'm not the embodiment of bad itself or anything. Let's blame it on that Satan guy. There's so many dimensional timelines, I can't be the ONLY BEING THIS BAD HERE! 

        I can't lose my cool completely here. Heck, not even at all. I need to keep up the façade in order to get out. That's right, and I'll be out here soon. I just know it. My all-seeing eye is still capable of looking through the abundant paths people can take. I see the last opportunity and will take it for myself. 

        Sixer, you're in for something that cannot be fixed. I'll make sure you regret not taking my hand to rule dimensions and travel across galaxies at my side. When I get my hands on you again, I will turn you back into a gold statue that'll be erected onto my record player, forever in a musical dance that spins. You'll be sorry.

        As for your good for nothing brother, there's an end for him that I am counting on. Just you wait, Stanley. Punching my eye and breaking my body in the mind space will be the last time you'll ever lay your mortal hands on me.

        I need to smear my mind blank. The SEA ANGEL of the Theraprism is here. Oh, how she's easy to manipulate. I guess it's why you can consider the gal an angel. It's a shame for her, really, because she's so easy to manipulate. The way she thinks I'm actually changing is HILARIOUS! What a shame for them for when their time comes. They'll all see.

        "Bill Cipher, good stars!" The dim-witted SEA ANGEL greeted happily.

        "Yes, good stars! Haha.." I greeted. 'Haha..'

☪︎ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･⋆˖⁺‧₊☽◯☾₊‧⁺˖⋆･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･❂

Links to the fanfics will be listed here so far:

Wattpad

Quotev

[twiceasfrustrating]

gn!MC and grim angst? Like, maybe the aftermath of MC nearly dying when he did that transfer? 👉🏻👈🏻

Fandom: A Date with Death Tags: Grim & MC, light angst and fluff A/N: Look at this divider I suffered making! I can't edit for shit so this is good work for me! HAHAHAHHA Also, my beautiful beta (who is the one who got me to play this game in the first place) told me there is an ending similar to this, but I haven't gotten it yet. If this is similar to that ending, it is a coincidence.

"Grim?" They asked warily, stomach rolling like they were on the edge of a ship.

"Shh," he reminded them yet again. "You need to stay focused."

"But-"

"Just keep looking at me. I'm almost across."

They nodded and forced themselves to ignore how terrible they felt deep down. Instead they tried to keep their attention only on Grim, using him as their anchor so they didn't fall overboard in the storm that was violently jostling them from side to side. They dug their nails into their own knees and held onto him for dear life.

When something unseen stabbed them through what they could only equate to as their heart -- the one they spoke of in metaphor rather than in the literal -- they knew that Grim had crossed over in the way they'd mocked him for only moments earlier. He had taken aboard their very soul and was marching across it's rocking surface.

He started to say something, a comment or two about what he had found, but they couldn't hear him. The way his feet dug into something intangible but still very present was new and they couldn't think of how to balance themselves again. He was there, but they were falling over the very edge they had been standing on and into the rash waves below.

"Grim," they tried again to get his attention as they began to drown inside of themselves.

"I'm almost done," he said without hearing the distress they were in.

He took a few more moments to look around before heading back to his side. By that time, however, they couldn't say anything to him. It felt like their lungs were full of saltwater.

They couldn't sit up in their seat, falling forward onto their desk in front of the camera as soon as they could fell that Grim was gone.

"Hey!" He suddenly yelled from beyond the monitor, leaning forward in his seat so suddenly that it looked like he'd fall out of it.

They couldn't respond through their choked breaths, only rolling their burning eyes upward to look at him. They were silently begging him for an answer. What happened? Why did it hurt so much? Could he make it stop?

"Gr...im..." They muttered as they clawed at the rolling waves that were slowly settling back down and forced themselves to swim toward the surface once again.

"You shouldn't be-" He looked as confused and panicked as they felt. "I didn't want this to happen! I didn't mean for this to-"

"Are you... worried... about me?" They chuckled at him as they finally managed to get their head above the stilled waters of their soul. They sat up slowly in their seat, leaning their elbows against the desk to keep themselves up as they gave a shaky smile to their partner on the other side of the screen. "Dork."

"I am not a dork." He barked back, but they could see the tears that had started to well up in his eyes and the corners of his mouth that were twisted downward. "You're the dork and I was far from worried. I knew that you would be perfectly fine."

"Don't go tsundere on me. You're the one that was crying." They still felt uneasy, but it was more a remnant of a terrible experience that hadn't yet left their memory than an active threat. "Just admit you were worried I'd kick the bucket."

"There's no bucket to kick. You would have simply died." He said and missed how they rolled their eyes at his misunderstand of the idiom. "In fact, if you would have died I could have grabbed your soul and this bet would be over."

"I bet it wouldn't have been a satisfying win though."

"My acquisition of your soul will be satisfying no matter how it's achieved."

"Sure thing, Grim." They lurched forward suddenly as their hand flew up to their mouth to keep them from vomiting. Even though the storm inside of them had calmed down, it still felt as if someone was walking where they shouldn't be and was leaving the ship they had finally managed to swim back to unbalanced.

"Sunshine!"

"Ha!" They smirked behind their hand. "See? You care~"

"I do not." His blush at being caught said otherwise, but they didn't feel well enough to argue with him.

"Sure thing, Grim." They wiped the sides of their mouth and shook their head. "Hey, I think I'm feeling whatever you were. An unbalanced soul or whatever you called it. Maybe we should both rest and talk again tomorrow?"

It was too hard to keep up with the conversation for them right now, especially now that they knew Grim hadn't been lying to them these last few days. It was a lot to process that he was, in fact, a genuine grim reaper and that he was after their soul. Worse yet, that he had quite nearly claimed it without seemingly meaning to. It was a lot to process all at once. Something they didn't think they could do properly in their current state as long as he was watching and, though he would never admit it without a fight, worrying for them.

He looked as if wanted to protest their request, but they knew he would never. He was, despite everything, too charming to be pushy.

"Do not be late in answering my call tomorrow," was what he chose to say instead.

"Of course not, my little reaper." The name felt different on their tongue now that they knew it was not just loving mockery but his very real job. "I wouldn't miss teasing you for all the world."

"It's not you who will do the teasing. Tomorrow, I shall finally have your soul and then you'll see that I am the master of teasing!"

"Looking forward to it." They chuckled. "Maybe I'll finally get to see you in person."

"Only for a moment."

He hesitated to end the call. The pause was so long that they could have given another quip, but they chose silence instead as they looked at the unspoken concern still dancing in his eyes as he looked at them through the screen.

They gave a small smile. "G'night, Grim."

"Goodnight, Sunshine. Sleep well." He finally said before hanging up the call.

As soon as the call was disconnected, they stood from their seat at the computer and made their way to the bed. Without much though, they fell face first into the pillows and sheets and closed their eyes. Everything felt gross, from their skin to their muscles to their bones to something they never new existed until tonight. It was sickening. They closed their eyes to try and ease the nausea still lingering inside of them, but all it did was make them more aware that something still wasn't right even after they'd managed to calm the storm.

From the desk, they could hear the sound of Grim sending them messages, but they were too tired and weak to check what he had sent.

[commander-krios]

A Silly Goose

Fandom: Mass Effect Pairing: Kaidan Alenko/Jeff "Joker" Moreau, Female Shepard & Jeff "Joker" Moreau Rating: Teen Summary: Joker doesn't like being second best. Not at flying, and certainly not at extranet games. There is one gamer in particular that's become a thorn in his backside. Now he needs to figure out how to get back to #1 while not embarrassing himself. Unfortunately, failure is Joker's middle name. Words: 4137 Additional Tags: Friendship, Humor, Fluff, Canon Disabled Character, post-ME1, pre-ME2, Everyone Roasts Joker, Cameos by Tali, Garrus and Wrex

This is a treat I made for the @hatboyexchange for @keriweird, @timptoe and grimeypickens on AO3.

Read on AO3

"I'm going to wipe the floor with you, CanadianGoose51!" Jeff Moreau muttered, tracking the man's character through the field, waiting for the perfect moment when he'd enact his revenge. For all of the times he was obliterated on the field, all of the times that Joker was just shy of a win and had it immediately stolen by the Earthborn human. At least, he assumed his enemy was Earthborn by username alone. "Let's hear you quack!"

Lining up his final shot, he knew this was it. He was going to win his first match in months. With a deep breath, he clicked the fire button, only for the shot to go wide and completely miss Canada man's character. "Fuck!"

There was a sudden flash before he was left with nothing but a black screen, a flashing red "Game Over" overlaid on it. There was no fucking way-

Throwing his hands up, Joker almost knocked the keyboard over. He managed to save it at the last second, but his cup wobbled as his elbow bumped it. It tipped over, rolled to the edge of the desk, before a biotic field appeared to save it. The mug floated in the air briefly before being set beside him again. Thankfully, it'd been empty.

With a huff, Joker swiveled his chair around, gaze seeking out the only person who'd understand his pain. 

"What the fuck?! How does he manage to do that?"

"Probably because you don't know the difference between a goose and a duck."

Shepard was resting on the couch in her cabin, with her feet on the seat and a datapad in her hand, and Joker rolled his eyes at her. Best friend or not, she could at least attempt to be supportive. The only person who was worse at this game than him was-

Well, the woman he was staring at now.

"Tomato, Tamato. It's a bird either way, right?"

"Didn't you grow up on a farm?" She asked, shaking her head almost as if she questioned his sanity. To be fair, she did question him most days, but that was usually in regards to him flying in insane maneuvers to save them from dying a fiery death. She could be a little grateful for him, after all. "You know what, I don't care. I can't take a man who names himself 'HotShotPilot69' on the extranet seriously."

“Hey! It was from my flight school days." And it was still accurate. "Can you take five minutes away from making fun of me and help?"

Shepard grinned at him, enjoying every moment of this torture because apparently she was all out of entertainment for the day. "Help? Where would the fun be in that? I love watching him kick your ass. In fact, if I could figure out who he is, I'd give him a medal for being one of the only two people in the galaxy to take your ass down a peg."

Joker grumbled, turning back to the terminal, hoping that ignoring her might finally shut her up. Maybe there was someone else who might help him with this. Did Tali play games? He knew she was good with tech, loved watching some cheesy soap opera type vids, but extranet games? What did quarians do when they weren't on their pilgrimages? 

"I can see you using that brain of yours, Joker." Shepard said, interrupting his train of thought. He shot a glare at her, a warning even though he knew he couldn't do shit, and she laughed in response. "Don't burn yourself out. It's really not that serious."

Maybe to her it wasn't, but his pride was on the line. Before CanadianGoose51 came onto the scene, Joker had been ranked number 1 in N7 Code of Honor: Medal of Duty. Now, he was second and the hell would he let that go without a fight. 

"Mock me all you want, Commander-"

"Oh, I will."

He ignored her interruption, intent on somehow winning this battle of wits between them. "But I plan on experiencing the glory of being the best once again. No one with the name 'Canadian Goose' is going to beat me at my favorite game."

She raised an eyebrow at him, a smile tugging at her lips. "It's an extranet game, Joker."

"It's more than that, Shepard. As if you'd understand anyway. You have stupid hobbies." He waved at the datapad in her hand and all she did was let out a snort.

"I'm reading. Or at least I was before you threw your tantrum."

"Ew. You read reports all day and your idea of fun is more reading?" Shutting down the terminal, he turned back to her in his swivel chair, waiting for her to tease him some more. Apparently, the only pastime she liked more than reading was roasting him alive.

"Are you jealous because you can't read, Joker?"

With a rude gesture, Joker got to his feet, feeling a little unsteady after sitting for so long. "Laugh it up, Shepard. You'll be eating your words soon enough."

As he turned to head back to the door, planning on getting in a shower and decompressing, Shepard piped up from behind him. "Are you sure you want to kick CanadianGoose51's ass? Because it sounds like you want to be him instead." 

Joker didn't respond, refusing to rise to her bait. He shuffled to the stairs, grabbing hold of the handrail to make sure he didn't trip on the way up. 

"Or maybe I'm reading this wrong, Jeff. Maybe, someone has a crush and doesn't know how to process it."

Ridiculous. He didn't even know who was on the other end of the extranet link and even if he did, no way he'd have any type of feelings past disdain for someone so obviously cheating to win. No, he was going to go back up against the Goose and he was going to beat them. Even if it took everything he had, he wasn't going to let it go until he won.

~~~~

The next morning, before he had to report to the helm, Joker found Tali'zorah sitting at the table in the mess hall, datapad in hand. There was a tube of that dextro-paste sitting beside her, half eaten and forgotten. He wasn't sure what she was busy doing, maybe finishing things involving her pilgrimage. If that was so, then she was probably nearly ready to return to her people. When she finally left, he was going to miss her. She was one of his favorite people on this damned ship. 

Sliding into the chair across from her, Joker tapped his fingers on the table, trying to glance at what was on her screen. "Whatcha working on?"

The quarian glanced up, her eyes shining through her faceplate. He could almost feel the judgment even if he couldn't see the expression on her face. "I would explain the inner workings of a geth's core processor, but I doubt you'd stay awake longer than the first sentence.”

Throwing his hands up as in defense, the pilot tried to look as innocent as he could, knowing that Tali wouldn't believe a word out of his mouth either way. "Hey, I'm just making sure you aren't sneaking in vids between movie nights. I've been waiting for months to see Bloody Mary. I know how hard it is to resist the allure of vampires and all, but you can't leave me hanging like that."

Especially when he'd be losing his movie buddy in a few short weeks.

"I thought we were watching Krantt Hardly Wait." She shook her head, letting out a noise that sounded suspiciously like a sigh. "That's not why you're here. Keelah, you're a bad liar."

"I resent that. I’m an excellent liar.”

“Joker-”

“Fine.” He shifted slightly, trying to find a comfortable position. It was difficult when he spent most of his days sitting in the pilot's chair and the times when he was on his feet were done with excruciating pain. Tugging on his hat, Joker tried his best to appear nonchalant. "I had some techy questions for you. In regards to combat."

Tali straightened, obviously interested in the change in topic. "I can't say I have much experience in combat strategy, minus the obvious geth incursions, but I'll help where I can. What did you want to know?"

"You use a shotgun, right? How do you manage to use your tech while firing? I'm having troub- err, I mean, I've always been interested in knowing how combat and tech can work together."

Tali was silent, studying him... Or maybe just thinking about her answer. Joker couldn't tell with the dark visor covering her face. She was always difficult to read because of it. Usually, he had no reason to worry, he'd always been upfront with her about what he needed and she was the same with him. But now, his skin felt flushed, almost like he was on the verge of sweating, his heart hammering in his chest at an unnatural rhythm. Nerves, anxiety, whatever it was, he wanted to flee from her glowing stare, or to argue so she wouldn't see through his lies. 

"Hmm." She tapped her an appendage against the datapad, bringing up some sort of chart before sliding it to him. "This is what I use when I'm in the field. A shield generator capable of omitting frequent bursts of energy if an enemy gets too close. It doesn't last forever and a point blank blast can almost always disable it, but it's good for a temporary solution. If you use a close range weapon, like a shotgun, it can keep you safe for a brief time."

The schematics were all gibberish to him, most of it written in quarian jargon or some type of tech lingo. Joker was good with flying and all manner of ships and their systems, but combat tech was an entirely different world. He'd have to research what it all meant, of course, but he could start here. Increasing his character’s shield output and finding a way to get close might be the thing he needed to defeat the Goose.

With a grateful smile, Joker took a moment to copy it to his own datapad, earmarking a few things he might want to follow up on before finding his feet. "Thanks for the help, Tali."

"If you have questions, I can talk about shields and tech all day." Tali teased him, a smile in her voice. He nodded, turning to head over to the coffee pot, hoping the machine wasn't full of Shepard's sorry excuse for coffee, when the quarian continued. "And Joker, good luck with your extranet game."

His cheeks flared red as he shuffled away, mumbling a thanks under his breath and trying to save his dignity by not tripping over his feet.

~~~~

Garrus was working on the Mako... again. He was always working on something: the tank, the battery, the Normandy's cannons, tinkering with the armory of sniper rifles. Either he was an overachiever or just enjoyed being overworked. Joker wasn't entirely sure if that was part of being a turian or if it was who Garrus Vakarian was, but he was exhausted watching him work so damned much.

Leaning heavily on his crutches, Joker stared at the bony legs sticking out from beneath the IVF, the only sound that of an omnitool combined with the clicking noise of some sort of tool hitting the undercarriage of the tank. He didn't know what the turian was up to, but most likely, Shepard was going to have to force him to stop whatever it was and get some rest.

In the meantime, however...

"What the hell are you doing?"

Garrus jumped at the intrusion, smacking his head into the undercarriage before letting out a low whine. Sliding out from under the tank, he was already rubbing his plates with a talon. Joker was greeted with a beady blue eyed glare in response.

"Hm. Didn't know turians scared easily."

"We don't."

"Whatever you say, Vakarian." Joker leaned on the railing next to the Mako, grateful for something that could hold him up that wasn't his own body. With a grin, he leaned forward slightly, meeting Garrus's glare with no fear. "You know, if you're such a scaredy cat, you can use that stick up your ass as a weapon."

"Ha ha." Garrus intoned, sitting up and rubbing his face again, stretching his mandibles in either annoyance or pain. Could've been both, but Joker didn't know much about turian facial expressions. If Shepard was here- 

No, he was mad at her. He didn't need her help anyway.

"Any particular reason you're staring at me, Joker?" Garrus asked, finally getting to his feet, closing the omnitool before reaching up to adjust his visor. The orange glow receded, leaving them in the light of the dull white from above, casting shadows along the metal flooring. "I know humans have a tendency to find turians attractive, but you never struck me as the type."

Joker couldn't help it, he blushed from the tips of his ears down to his toes. He didn't- there was no way. There was nothing about Garrus he could possibly find attractive. He reminded him too much of Shepard at times. Then there was the stick that lived up his ass. No, the only thing that Garrus ignited in him was a desire to poke fun at him.

"No!" The denial burst from his mouth, completely embarrassing him as much as his red cheeks did. "I like the asari, blue and beautiful, and you know, with five fingers."

Garrus clicked his mandibles together.

What the fuck did that mean? Sir Isaac Newton, this was a mistake.

"I'll let Liara know of your interest then."

Fucking hell, this needed to end. "No, that's alright. You don't need to do or say anything. I was looking for you for... non-romance reasons." Clearing his throat, he glanced around the shuttle bay, hoping to find anything to distract himself with. The sight of the armory lockers gave him a sudden idea. "Uh, sniper rifles."

"Sniper rifles?"

"I was wondering if you could show me the best way to hit your target. Tricks, tips."

"That so?"

"Maybe a demonstration? I was interested in learning how a rifle works. Just in case."

That was the stupidest fucking excuse he might've come up with yet.

Garrus cocked his head slightly, watching Joker with a piercing gaze that definitely saw through his bullshit. "Are you sure this isn't some sort of romance thing? Because, if so-"

With a sigh and another burst of color along his cheeks, Joker tried not to choke on the words as he forced them out, panic making it difficult to do anything that didn't include fleeing. This sort of thing was why he was only friends with a handful of people. "Stop saying that. If you don't want to help-"

"I didn't say that." Garrus countered, replacing his wrench to the toolbox at his feet. When he straightened up, he met Joker's gaze, searching for something, but thankfully decided to stop teasing him. "Let me clean this up and I can explain the particulars."

Yeah, he was going to regret this.

~~~~

He was an idiot.

After the embarrassing interactions with Tali and Garrus, he'd hoped he could find someone who had any idea how to help him with his Goose problem. Tali's shield trick and Garrus's scope training would only do so much and despite it only being for a video game, he truly didn't want to embarrass himself anymore. Not in the game or outside of it.

So who did he decide to ask?

Fucking Urdnot Wrex.

Asking a krogan for help was only going to end one of two ways: Every single bone in his body was going to end up broken, crushed beneath enormously strong hands. Or, Joker was going to end up dead from Wrex's 'help'.  Neither option sat particularly well with him.

Yet, despite all of that, Joker sat in front of Wrex as the krogan cleaned his shotgun, watching with perverse fascination as the krogan gently lifted the weapon, cradling it as if it was a newborn child in need of extra care. He was positive that krogan didn't treat their legitimate young as kindly as Wrex treated his gun.

"So, whelp, what did you need help with?" Wrex kept a singular blood red eye on Joker even as he cleaned the gun.

"I need help... with a guy." Joker said, evasively, trying to figure out how offended Wrex would be if he flat out asked for help with an extranet game. He'd never seen the krogan laugh, or really be affectionate with anyone but Shepard. He didn't know how far he could push before he ended up as a human pancake on the floor of the ship.

"Killing him?" Wrex asked, tossing the rag he'd been using on the bench before inspecting his weapon. "My favorite part is the killing."

I know, Joker thought, casting his gaze around for any sign of another person. He wasn't picky at this point. He'd gladly take Garrus's teasing again if it meant he didn't need to have this conversation at all. Garrus might even be able to distract Wrex so he could sneak away, hide until the krogan forgot he'd ask him for anything-

"You humans think too much."

Joker realized silence had fallen between them and he awkwardly swung his feet, the stool he sat on shaking with the movement. "Yeah, we do. Look, Wrex-"

"Human."

Joker ignored the implied insult. "I don't want to kill anyone. I need to beat him at his own game." 

Wrex stared at him, in some sort of aggressive confusion. "Is this some stupid human idiot?"

"Idiom." Joker corrected automatically and Wrex's nostrils flared at that. He wondered if he'd be able to make it to the elevator before Wrex reached him. "It doesn't matter. I just need to know a good place to hit someone to take them down easily."

"The quad."

"Yes, that tends to work on most species." Joker said, trying not to let a sigh slip out. "I meant other places. Fleshy places that might bring a human down."

Wrex chuckled, dark and deep, and it sounded like a threat. "No place easier than the dangly bits, kid. Hit 'em where it hurts and hit 'em hard."

Joker figured it wasn't a bad option. He wasn't sure if he could apply it in a video game, however.

"Thanks for the help, Wrex."

"Anytime, kid."

~~~~

"I can't believe you asked Wrex for help." Shepard said, holding her sides as she laughed, not even noticing the glare that Joker sent her. Though, if she did, she would've just ignored it and laughed some more. "What did he say when you told him you didn't want to kill anyone?"

Joker grumbled under his breath, easily keeping pace with Shepard since she could barely walk with how she laughed. "We aren't friends anymore."

"Oh, come on, Jeff. You did this to yourself." She glanced at him with a smile. "If you'd just asked me-"

"You would've found more reasons to make fun of me."

"Yes, but I also would have helped you. I know someone else who plays this game and they're pretty good."

"Yeah, right. No one is better than me."

She raised an eyebrow at him and he promptly shut his mouth. Oh, right. The entire reason for this charade was because somebody was better than him. He didn't respond, only stared ahead as they got to the elevator that would take them to the mess hall. 

"You don't believe me." She said once the door shut behind them, the ship nearly silent in the tiny elevator shaft. It was always eerie how quiet it got once those thick doors closed.

"I never said that."

She snorted, undignified and all. "You don't have to. I can see it written on your face."

"Stop reading my face."

Shepard rolled her eyes, leaning against the wall of the elevator with her arms crossed over her chest. "You get so grumpy when you're embarrassed. Will you just let me help you?"

He resisted the urge to snap at her, to tell her to mind her business, that she'd done enough to 'help' him in recent months. Instead, knowing that he was going to regret trusting her, Joker nodded, refusing to look directly at her. If he did and she gave him even the smallest twitch of a smile, he might lose his nerve and just space himself. The doors opened to the mess hall, the wide open space empty except for Kaidan and Dr. Chakwas. Kaidan was sitting at the table, a coffee and simple breakfast laid out next to a report he was working on. 

The good doctor gave them a nod as he and Shepard entered, raising her mug of tea in greeting before disappearing into her office. Walking to the large dining table, Shepard lifted herself onto it, sitting cross legged across from where Kaidan ate, peering over at the report he was writing.

"Hey, Kai. Do you think you could help our friend here with something?"

"I'd love to, but I'm a bit busy at the moment." He waved at the log next to him. Rows and rows of armory items with marine assignments next to the ones that'd been given out. Boring as hell paperwork. Then again, most paperwork was boring.

"This is more important than equipment inspections, LT."

"Hackett might think differently, Commander."

"And he's perfectly allowed to do so as long as he stops bothering me." Shepard nudged the portable terminal towards him, a sly smirk on her face. "I have more fun things for us to discuss."

Joker didn't like the look on her face and he realized he'd walked into a trap. This had been her plan all along. To get him and Kaidan alone... Gods, how stupid was he?

"Do you still play that N7 game?" 

"N7 Code of Honor: Medal of Duty?" Kaidan took a sip of his coffee, dark eyes glancing in Joker's direction briefly before returning to Shepard. 

"Yeah. Our hot shot pilot here needs some pointers on how to beat this guy who keeps kicking his ass. I remember how good you were when we used to play." Shepard leaned back, placing her hands on the table behind her, a satisfied smirk on her face. "What do you say to being Joker's mentor?"

Kaidan glanced at him shyly and Joker swore there was a light dusting of pink on his cheeks. "I have a lot of work to do, Shepard. Maybe another time."

"Oh, come on, Kaidan! You're such a silly goose!" Shepard glanced in Joker's direction and it hit him like a skycar. This... no...

Kaidan's blush only darkened and he buried his face in his hands. 

Shit.

"You're CanadianGoose51!" The words burst from him before he could stop them and he felt like his world just tilted beneath his feet. Scrambling to reach for a chair, he found that Shepard had already pushed one out for him to sit in. 

Kaidan dropped his hands to the table, grimacing at the mention of his username. "Please don't spread that around. I'd rather people didn't know."

"You're... amazing! And infuriating!" Joker stared at the biotic in front of him, finding it hard to believe that this quiet and kind man was the one destroying him in a damned game. He might even be a little in love. "How many hours have you logged?"

"Too many." Kaidan looked like he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him. "Joker, if I'd known you were HotShotPilot, I wouldn't have gone so hard on you."

"Why? You think I can't beat you on my own?" Joker wanted to be angry about that, but nothing Kaidan did was to purposely hurt someone. He was too fucking nice.

Kaidan met his gaze. Joker didn't know what he saw when he looked at him, but he wasn't angry anymore. Not if it was Kaidan winning the matches. 

"If you think I'm going to let you give me a win, you've got another thing coming. We're going to have a rematch and I'll wipe the floor with you. I'm going to make you whimper like a baby."

Shepard coughed, covering her mouth with her hand, but he heard what she was trying to hide easily. "You'd like that."

The back of Joker's neck flared with embarrassment, but Kaidan didn't seem to hear her. He only smiled, a devious twinkle in his eyes that made Joker's stomach tie up in knots. "It's a date then."

He didn't know why that sounded so good, but Joker was actually looking forward to it.

[lemotmo]

Hello hello! Let’s get some fun positivity up in this fandom!

After Buddie get together, what is a storyline for them you would give anything to see them get? It can be something with just them, or something with them and Chris. Or both!

For me, I want to see them go on a double date with Henren or have a date night/game night with Madney. I think those would be fun things to see them do. I can just picture them out dancing with Henren or getting Buck and Maddie getting super competitive over a game of Uno while Eddie and Chim just sit there in exasperated fondness over their Buckley sibling 😂 not to mention the banter? It would be top notch. Sassy Eddie would have a blast 😂😂

With Chris, while I do want to see some adjustment period with them, Buck getting use to having a more full time active parental role, Chris getting use to that as well,and maybe even just a little wary at first of them dating because hello he’s seen both of them dating people for years now(but not to long before he’s like ok this is fine) ultimately I’d love to see them just have some nice sweet family moments with the three of them again like we used to get. Them on the couch playing video games, out at the park playing, maybe now that Chris is older we can see the three of them on the couch watching one of their telenovela’s re season 6, just all 3 sitting there under the blanket, with 4 s’mores this time, one for each and the extra for Shannon, showing the full integration of Buck into the family 😁

Oooh I like this one Nonny. Thank you so much! Fandom-wise these have been a rough couple of months/weeks/days. The Buddie fandom can use some positivity at the moment.

I guess, after they are together, I would like to see the little domestic scenes. Them cooking together, often stopping in the middle of their activities to kiss 'cause it's all still very new and they can't keep their hands (and lips) off each other. :)

I'd also like to see some drama. One of them stays behind in a fire or a building collapses on top of them or something like that. They could still be in a secret relationship at this point. One of them worried to death, running straight into a burning building, Bobby holding them back. Them pleading with Bobby to let them go in. When they finally find them and take them to the hospital, Bobby, Chim and Hen all share a look, realising that something has shifted in Buddie's relationship. I just need some good juicy drama and hurt/comfort.

As for Chris. Just like you, I'd love to see them navigate their new life together. Chris a little wary at first, but quickly realising that he gets to have Buck around all the time now and he's so happy with that. Them just being a family, enjoying time together. It would be so great.

I love your idea with the s'mores and how they would have one extra for Shannon. I would burst into tears for sure.

What about all the other Buddie fans? Let's open up this question for others as well:

After Buddie get together, what is a storyline for them you would give anything to see them get? It can be something with just them, or something with them and Chris. Or both!

Feel free to reblog and add your own storylines. Or just put it in the tags.

Let us bring some positivity back. This fandom is unbeatable! It's the best of the best!

[foibles-fables]

hi foibs, hoping you’re doing well. there’s something i’ve wanted to ask you since burning shores…can you say more about why you weren’t impressed by seyka/seyloy? i’ve valued your hzd opinions for a long time and am curious and interested to learn more about this one. but if you’d rather not answer that’s fine!

Hi nonny!! I told myself I wasn't going to answer any of these, but I really appreciate your kind tone and am happy to address this again for you!

I won't go into a list of specific reasons why here. I do enjoy a good bit of piece-by-piece analysis a LOT but--frankly, picking apart another ship in a public zone like this is not what I want to exemplify on my blog, at all. It's not the kind of environment I'd like to create or discourse I'd like to foster. If those conversations are to be had at all--which, let's face it, they're probably not--they're to be had one on one, with a promise of good faith and open-mindedness between participants.

So to answer your question, I'll give a little more info, but still in generalities.

First and foremost, it's the simple fact that their dynamic, as portrayed in HBS, didn't spark for me! If y'all know me, you know that there is a very specific ship dynamic that I tend to latch onto, and this repeats ad infinitum across fandoms. I just wasn't compelled by the material, which is fine! More power to you if you were, for sure.

That loops into the second reason I'll give: yes, I did find the writing of HBS to be lackluster in many aspects, including the relationship between Aloy and Seyka. The sloppy writing absolutely influenced the way I viewed/reacted to Aloy and Seyka as a ship. To me, it did feel rushed and very much removed from the character and pacing of the series we've known for years. And that was not a boon for connecting with the presented narrative, the same way I began to feel disconnected from HFW. Once again, though, totally subjective and valid if it did hit for you!

I wanted to like Seyka so much more than I did. (This is--as I've shared other posts before--commentary on the writer's room character work, not on Seyka.) I wanted her to oust Alva as my favorite Quen babygirl (A HARD CHALLENGE, I'll admit). I wanted to be compelled by her, and by her dynamic with Aloy. She didn't, and I wasn't. And that's not an attack on Seyka herself, or on folks who enjoyed her. That's my own peeve with the writing and the way she was presented both in the narrative and in the HBS marketing.

If I can also use your ask to be a little vulnerable, nonny? It's been a hard six weeks. I feel like the posts I've put up and the opinions I've offered with regards to this have been nothing less than respectful and pleasant and, in a lot of cases, that grace hasn't been returned. From being blocked/unfollowed/vagued by other Horizon wlw shippers with whom I've built a rapport over the years (which of COURSE it's anyone's right to curate their feeds--still stings on the other side, in this situation especially)--to being directly compared to the Actual Homophobes for supporting the idea of romance options in game three (the same Actual Homophobes sending death and other threats directly to my inboxes)--it's an unfortunate state. I'm doing my best to be positive for the whole fandom, but some days it's harder than others.

In any case--I'll say, contradictorily--there is a Seyloy idea I've been working on, in attempts to connect more with them and sublimate my quibbles with what was presented in canon. So I hope any Seyloy enjoyers who might read it eventually (and this!) will take it in good faith when it's finished, as it's being written in nothing but good faith!

And, FINALLY, because every single time this question comes up, I say "I DON'T DISLIKE SEYKA" out loud in Nadja's voice, and this is the perfect opportunity to finally make the joke in public:

[pianostarinwonderland]

stuff in my head about what's happening

there is absolutely no end to the drama that is Twisted Wonderland :-)

"what's happening now" so basically everyone is disappointed with how Vil's SSR has absolutely no story. no personal, no appearance in the event. he's just there to be pretty. and give furniture.

and you Know it's bad Bad when not only the EN fans but the JP fans are talking about it. and by talking about it, i mean

personal story has trended

a big twst artist, twst_13, made a tweet expressing that they were pretty upset with the lack of story, and well.. that honestly ended up being their last straw in leaving the twst fandom. and due to their rep, it really spread throughout the fandom and uh yeah here we are

and rn a lot of people are doomposting. just your regular twst afternoon

so yeah it's been fun so far B)

in all seriousness, ik a lot of people aren't happy with this. if you're really discontented with what's going on so far, email twst. giving feedback is the best way for them to know what their audience wants, and they do listen to their fans if enough people send them concerns. you can send through this link. i think it would be great to email them in Japanese, but if you really can't, wellll let's hope some people there understand English <3

anyway there's a cut because i currently have talk too much disease and have Opinions on this so i want to make it an easier scroll for people encountering this post.

hi welcome to under the cut, where you will find the real reason why i'm making this post: to not Shut Up about what's going on.

personally my thoughts on this are mixed. on one hand, I really don't mind some cards just getting furniture instead of stories because (1) guest room feature nice for me, but I also understand that those who aren't immersed in it would be more frustrated; (2) more importantly is the thought that with less stories to write about, the writing team would actually, idk, have more breaks. the main focus would be delivering a Good main story chapter, and they put event stories on a halt for a bit.

on the other hand, this Is an event SSR, so it feels weird. club cards are acceptable because at least it's new New art and kinda accepted already that it's not gonna get personals. the main story cards, like cerberus Ortho and upcoming general Lilia SSR, are acceptable because they are already accompanied by main story. some tsumsted cards like the SRs and Rs are acceptable too because the event story itself already accompanies them. but an event SSR of an event being reran. it's a bit disappointing.

but at the same time, i've also gone through the time that twst was slow in pacing. and it was really hard. that was the first wave of exodus, and it's still the biggest one to this day. so it's like, if guest room furniture can let them keep updating the game so that it doesn't go too quiet, then I'd really much rather have what we're having now over slow pacing.

and diasomnia has been in the waiting room for wayyyy too long. a lot of fans, EN and JP alike, have been frustrated with how long they had to wait for diasomnia content. and ik twst listens to complaints especially from their JP audience. so it's good that now they're shifting priorities to dia story and ensuring that fans aren't dying too fast. and ngl after how long pome and igni felt (emphasis on felt because pome actually wasn't that long in hindsight, it just felt long after how we went from frequent octa and scarabia to two-month halloween), it's good that main story is getting updated at a good pace.

most importantly, i really just hope that the writers have more room to breathe. making a lot of personal stories, as well as revising, editing, and getting approval would be understandably difficult. in the end, we really don't know the situation in the hq, so whatever is happening there, i hope that the teams and devs aren't burning out

at the same time though, i also don't want event SSRs like upcoming Silk Vil not having personals to become a norm. a big part of what makes twst enjoyable is their story and their characters. and much of what we know of the characters is found in the personal stories. but see, this is where sending in a concern is important!! because we want this game to be as best as it can, and simply complaining about it will cause an echo chamber of doompostings with no substantial effort being put into actually doing something about it. i'm probably gonna see if i could send a concern to them about it because yeah, I want to see twst doing better.

[silversiren1101]

Owlcatober 2023 Day 1: Protection (and Memory!)

My first entry for Owlcatober! (@owlcatober). I'd promised myself a min 500 words and ended up with 4,585!

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous (Video Game) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: The Commander (Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous), Seelah (Pathfinder RPG) Additional Tags: Owlcatober (Pathfinder), Heart-to-Heart, Armor, just girls having a heart to heart chat over polishing some heavy plate armor, Amnesia, Memory Loss Series: Part 1 of Siren's Owlcatober 2023 Summary:

Not yet Knight Commander, Minovae Arangeir retreats to the quiet of Defender's Heart's stables to polish heavy armor "scavenged" from the battlefield. The weight of her missing memories sits heavily on her, having woken up only days ago in Kenabres with only a name and country of origin. Her steadfast new friend, Seelah, has her own thoughts on the matter.

The armor came apart easily under Minovae’s hands, seemingly remembering by muscle what she couldn’t by memory. The plackart and cuirass separated with some bolts, and next came the faulds; which she didn’t like, for some reason. Another word floated to her distantly from the hazy soup that was her thoughts: tassets. Something in her told her that she preferred tassets. The fact that she knew what they were—the sheets of armor that extended down the thigh from the waist—much less that she had a preference for them, made her sigh heavily as she worked. She hardly knew anything else about herself since waking at that festival however many days ago. Armor, though? Important enough to her to remember, apparently. No, not just remember but have preferences for! Was it because of her tail? That made sense, given the thought of reattaching the faulds to the plackart in her hands made the top of it ache and itch with phantoms. She must’ve had bad experiences before, confirmed as images flashed in her mind then: the sight of her ganzi scales, cracked and oozing from armor chafe, and said armor, so ill fitting, being replaced with a new suit of something… dark… Far darker than what was in her lap now…

She growled in frustration as the image abruptly slipped away from her, feathers bristling from the back of her neck all the way down her spine. Even the tip of her tail snapped, the sound of the plume at the end like a soft whip crack. She nearly threw the armor piece away, wanting to hurl it into the corner of the stable where the hay would catch it, but that strange, cold restraint from before washed over her again. It was the same as when the flash of rage had taken her in the Shield Maze at the revelation of what’d happened to the mongrels, towards Hosilla and Wenduag, who even thinking of now brought confusing feelings of guilt and mistake. But like before, with that burning heat of rage, icy discipline welling from somewhere else within her snuffed it out. The feeling, like gauntlets cooly alighting on her shoulder and wrist and curling underneath her chin, not to crush or harm but to guide and hold her head high, shut out the bristling chaos of emotion.

Breathe, it told her, and so she did. 

She reclined backward with a deep inhale, looking up at the stable roof where she noted the holes in the thatching that would make this place into a puddle should the sky open. Stars twinkled through the holes, and something in her squeezed at the sight, like she… she couldn’t remember the last time she’d seen a clear night sky, a thought that carried with it some horror she had no recollection of. 

And breathe again. She followed the order, exhaling deeply and shunting those star-born feelings too, away to someplace else. 

Calm descended upon her once more. She relaxed back into the position she’d been in previously, where her violet eyes—unnervingly bright—stared back up at her from the now much cleaner cuirass in her lap. The weariness in them was apparent. 

There was no point chasing these flashes of memory, she reminded herself. The harder she tried, the more elusive they became, like trying to grab a bar of soap from the depths of the tub. They came to her only subconsciously as nagging reminders, or the opposite of when you walk through a doorway and forget what you’d just been about to do. The most she could do was continue what she’d been doing before that’d caused them to appear in the first place—even as much as she was terrified of knowing the truth of herself. Waking up with no memory in the middle of demonic invasion, knowing how to fight, knowing instinctively of demons and cults and how they worked, with this wound on her chest that ached like nothing else and being… what she was, given tieflings seem to fill the cults’ ranks in droves and she was something similar enough…

And knowing that that gripping, snarling, devouring rage that came over her in the Shield Maze had to have come from somewhere deep down within her; from the parts she couldn’t remember. Even if that discipline that’d corrected and steeled her resolve had come from the same place, the fact the former existed at all filled her with a disquiet she couldn’t bear to think overly long on. 

She was afraid of herself. There was no denying it.

But there was no denying this armor had to be cleaned, either. Fear over the self she didn’t know resurfacing through muscle memory be damned.

And so her hands moved over the pieces of armor once more, their names and purposes coming to her idly, as she scrubbed them cleaned with the rag. From the same places that knowledge came did the knowledge that demonic viscera had to be cleaned out fast, something about the acidity in the blood causing rust, even with proper solvent and oiling routines. She somehow knew what those were too, having grabbed containers of both from the meager equipment ‘armory’ in the inn’s pantry, which were now both sitting off to the side next to her here in the Defender’s Heart stables. She could have done this in her room, but the bustle and din inside the inn had quickly grown suffocating at the thought—especially with the risk of their newest ‘recruit’ seeking her attention while in the midst of it.

Count Arendae seemed to have figured out quickly that nearly everything about him repulsed her, to her chagrin. Which, combined with the fact he seemed particularly infatuated with her ganzi-ness, meant that he couldn’t seem to leave her well enough alone for more than an hour at a time. All so many insinuating euphemisms disguised as questions about her scales and feathers and fangs! She could hardly remember more than her name, and yet the answers had come as easily to her mind as easily as she’d told him to shut the Hells up and make himself useful about the place. Beggars couldn’t be choosers, though. His healing abilities paired with his shocking willingness to lend them made him just tolerable enough to keep around.

He very much was like the second-hand armor she was currently working so hard to get into serviceable condition, in a way. The cultist that’d been wearing it had barely been dead on the ground for an entire second before she’d clocked that he hadn’t just been wearing half-plate, but enchanted half-plate. Something in her had called out for it, had been calling for it since she’d woken only with scalemail at that damned festival, the lightness having made her feel as naked as a babe. This half-plate wasn’t perfect—she craved something even heavier, her limbs without a doubt accustomed to more than even this—but, much like with Daeran, desperate times called for desperate measures.

Like wearing a dead man’s armor. That she’d slain herself.

At least the chalk and blood scrawling of Baphomet’s unholy symbol had come off with barely any elbow grease needed. She would just… try not to think too hard about where the armor she would be wearing came from. 

Suddenly, the sound of approaching boots, heavy, snapped her out of her thoughts. She looked up to see a familiar smile, as radiant as the sword on its owner’s hip, approaching from across the Defender’s Heart enclave. Even over the din of survivors and guards and crusaders shoring up the inn’s defenses, distributing other recovered arms and armor to those that could bear it, and the mixed chorus of bitter laughter and desperate sobs, Seelah’s footfalls could be heard as clear as the support drumbeat in a tavern song.

“There you are, Minnow! I was wondering where you’d gotten off to”, she beamed at her as Minovae gave a short wave and dip of her chin in greeting.

The paladin, coming to the side of the stable’s half-doors still closed, rested her forearms on the sill. She seemed about to say something more, a question on her lips, only for her smile to falter to bewilderment upon seeing the pieces of dismantled armor surrounding Minovae on the stable floor. “Woah! Careful, you know that stuff isn’t easy to put back together. Plate armor is in short supply around here.”

“In such short supply that I had to take this off of a dead cultist, yeah”, Minovae cracked a grin in response. “You don’t think they’ll miss it, will you?”

“Uhh, given how you smashed his head like a melon on a summery holiday, I think the only thing he’ll be missing in the Boneyard is a helmet.” 

Something dark had passed across the paladin’s gaze beneath now furrowed brows, and the normal humorous note in her tone sounded uncharacteristically strained. Something in Minovae sank at the sight and at some realization. It’d just come naturally to her, that way of fighting, and she hadn’t batted an eye at the aftermath.

“...Am I really that brutal in combat?”, she asked, voice having gone quiet.

Seelah blinked, and Minovae watched as she made a concerted, determined effort to reignite her dazzling smile. Even knowing the effort, it did make her feel better to see in a way. Seelah just kind of had that effect, like when the sun finally reappeared after a streak of cloudy days.

“In particular? No, I think that just comes with the territory of bludgeoning weapons, sis’,��� she reassured her. “They tend to make a mess, which is why you probably fight with a shield, too. Helps catch the—”, a grimace broke between the words, “—splatter.”

Was it? Minovae considered it. The call to a shield had been as strong as the call to heavier armor, something in her accustomed to it like wearing normal clothing. Fighting without either throughout the caves beneath Kenabres and the Gray Garrison had felt like fighting in her skivvies. It wasn’t because of the blunt-weapon splatter, no, even though the grip of the warhammer she’d taken from a rack in the Shield Maze had been as familiar as breathing. All she’d known was that she was called to the front line of their little fighting group, that her rightful spot was in the vanguard, because the thought of anyone else getting hurt when it could—and should—be her filled her with shame and horror. You can’t keep everyone else protected if you can’t keep yourself protected…

“...You really still don’t remember who you are, do you?”

The question made her realize a few seconds of silence had passed, and that she’d been frowning, expression frozen into a pensive look. She looked back up at Seelah, noting that soft, concerned look in her warm brown eyes.

“No… Just the flashes here and there. Like—”, she gestured at the pieces of armor around her, “—I know the names of all these pieces, and how they come apart and go back together again. I know they have to be cleaned and polished and oiled, and I know demon blood rusts and rots even the most babied steel. I know how to wear it and fight in it, just as I know how to sunder it off the enemy… And I know how to angle a shield to drive it into the gaps of armor, and that if you bring a hammer down onto the edge, you’ve got a makeshift guillotine…”

A flash of disgust and horror shot through Seelah’s expression at that last part Minovae said almost unconsciously. She hadn’t even known that she’d known that. It’d just come out with all the rest, like more of the same. Not wanting to linger on that particular imagery for long, she continued.

“But as for why I know all of this…? Seelah, I don’t even know where to start”, she sighed with a shrug of her shoulders and an agitated rattle at the tip of her tail. 

“Hey, that’s okay, you know!”, Seelah reassured, tone back to its cheeky self. “You fight demons like you’re born for it and you’ve got a heart of gold. You might not know who you were but I know who you are: someone I trust.”

Minovae balked at that. “How can you say you trust me? How can anyone trust me in this situation! I could be just another cultist that’s just forg—”

“HAAAAAAAAH!” 

She jumped at the sudden howl of Seelah’s laughter, cutting her off. 

The sheer oomph of it had thrown the paladin’s head back. Seelah practically howled in amusement to the night sky above, and Minovae could only stare in wide-eyed surprise. It carried on for some few seconds, before Seelah fell back over the stable half-door, shaking her eye and wiping a tear from her eyes.

“Minnow, seriously? I know you’ve got a dark sense of humor but you are not a cultist.”

Indignance licked like a little burning flame in her gut at how self-assured Seelah sounded, and how her concerns were apparently so outrageous as to howl in laughter. Her lips pressed together tightly before she snapped. “How can you be so sure? Waking up with no memory in the middle of all this and having just the right knowledge to survive what should be impossible odds is a bit convenient!”

Seelah just stared at her, smirk having gone smugly confident enough as to further rile that knot of annoyance the laughter had stirred within her. 

“Because, Minnow, by the grace of Iomedae—”, Minovae swallowed down her atheistic distaste at the smugness in the declaration, “—I can sense evil. And you? You look like a decorated tree during Crystalhue with how brightly you shine with Goodness.”

That gave her pause. She felt a heat creep into her cheeks, could feel them reddening beneath the seafoam colored scales lining them. Figuring out how she could ever respond to that left the two warrior women in silence for some few seconds as she mentally puttered through her thoughts. Seelah only looked more knowingly self-assured in her smile with each passing one.

“I… I…”, Minovae eventually sputtered, before breathing deep and turning her attention back downwards to the half-cleaned armor she’d come out here to tend to. “...I’m just someone trying to do what I can out here, okay? I don’t know if that makes me a shining paragon of ‘Goodness’ in your goddess’ eyes or whatever. I’m just… doing my part, you know? Because I can fight and that means I can protect, even if I don’t know how or why or where those skills came from.”

Seelah’s own response was an amused snort, exhaled through her nose. Minovae didn’t bother to look up, suddenly feeling like she’d been thrown into a matron’s washbucket and churned all about with the washing pole. The feelings of fear over her unknown past and the unquestionable proof that was a paladin’s metaphysical senses—calling it confusing didn’t even begin to cut it. Instead, she reached for the solvent over her shoulder on the bale of hay she’d parked herself against and began to dab it on a particularly nasty clump of grime caught in the curves of where the plackart hugged the wearer’s sides. When was the last time this was cleaned? She’d gotten it off a cultist, she reminded herself, so probably never.

Movement in the corner of her vision told her that Seelah wasn’t done with her yet, though. The paladin straightened up, pulling herself off the sill, and rounded the half of the door already opened. A great clanking of armor sounded as she crossed the hay-strewn floor and subsequently unceremoniously plopped herself into a cross-legged sit directly across from Minovae, sending pieces of hay flying from the gust of air.

Minovae said nothing. She kept her attention downward to the armor, the piece already cleaned but not wanting to risk her reaching for another to work on as concession or acknowledgement of the paladin’s presence. Frustration and annoyance and confusion rolling in her chest like a tangle of cats. Why did she take so poorly to being comforted? Or complimented? Or reassured?

Because that’s your job, something in her said. You’re the protector. You’re the guardian. Seelah is your junior. You are the one that needs to look after her. It’s your job as her commander offic—But, no. She wasn’t. She was no one’s ‘commanding officer’... Why that word?

A rustling, clanking sound made her blink back into focus. She looked up from the work in her lap and hands to find Seelah in the middle of doffing her own armor, a flat, determined expression on her face.

“What?”, Seelah paused, flashing a daring, challenging grin. “You’ve already got all the stuff out for it. I might as well join you. Like you said, demon blood chews through armor like nothing else.”

Minovae merely stared at her, feeling suddenly very exhausted. Ultimately, she shrugged, and scooted the bucket of water and cleaner rags to within Seelah’s reach, knowing full well this was an excuse to continue this conversation further. “Alright, then.”

To her credit, at least, Seelah managed to pass some several minutes in silence; save for asking Minovae to pass the picks or solvent every now and again. It was almost calming, in a way, sharing the space with someone else working on their own armor.

Nostalgic, she realized. It was familiar and comforting. It felt, bizarrely, like home.

And then Seelah broke the silence. 

“You know, when I made that comment about that cultist missing his helmet”, she said so quietly that Minovae second-guessed whether she’d spoked at all. “I wasn’t actually thinking about him. Or you.”

Minovae paused in where she’d been oiling up the now re-assembled breastplate in her hands. Slowly, she looked up into Seelah’s face, finding that the paladin was staring off into space, her expression now more pensive. A knot of worry clenched in her stomach. The last thing she’d wanted was to pass off her worries and foul feelings onto someone else—in fact, that’s why she’d attempted to end the conversation. Now it turned out that Seelah hadn’t been alluding to how Minovae handled herself in combat? With how easily she took the lives of their enemies, with nary a blink nor worry about the gore? She felt a rise of sheepishness at how self-absorbed she was to have assumed it’d been about her, but banished it handily; you are the one that looks after everyone else. Fix this. 

She swallowed, and invited the connection.

“Okay… so, what were you thinking about, then? The way your tone had fallen, it sounded like it’d really troubled you.”

Seelah breathed deep—inhale, exhale, so much like how she had calmed herself earlier—and leveled her with a trusting gaze. “...Can I tell you a story? About who I was before I became Seelah the paladin?”

Where was this conversation going? Minovae held her stare for a few moments, realizing that Seelah was about to share something with her deeply personal. She was as touched about it as she was uncomfortable, but that internal command insisted yet again, fix this. 

And so she nodded, and Seelah shared her story.

She listened in rapt attention, hardly touching the armor at all, as Seelah told her all about the mithral helmet she’d stolen from a paladin named Acemi when she was but a young thief. She listened as Seelah detailed the guilt that’d overtaken her, having stolen from the very people that’d come to Solku to protect people like her—yes, even the thieves and the criminals, because that’s what paladins do. She listened, and tempered her reaction as she knew where the story was going even before Seelah described how Acemi, who had been among the bravest of those paladins, perished holding the gates against the endless horde of gnolls a Solku’s gates; about she’d crumpled from taking a flail to the skull.

A blow that that stolen helmet might have saved her from. 

“From that day onward I… I knew I had to make up for it. I promised myself to justice and goodness right then, and now here I am”, she sighed, shoulders relaxing along with her breath. “Seelah the paladin may not be the Acemi the world lost because of her stupid, selfish choices, but I’m just… I’m doing my part!”

She said the last part, parroting those words back at her, with a renewed zeal and bright smile.

Minovae couldn’t help but respond in kind, feeling herself smile wider than hardly anytime else since she’d awoken in Kenabres. 

“You know, you really are the model paladin…”, she chuckled softly. “Climbing onto a funeral pyre in guilt and living for the woman that let you keep that helmet even knowing you took it.”

Seelah gave her a wry chuckle back, grin going lopsided. “You bet I am. Just as you’ve decided you need to protect all these people even when the only thing you remember is your own name and that you’re from Cheliax. Most would be more concerned with their own problems, you know.”

“...It’d be wrong of me not to”, Minovae shrugged. “Like I said, I’m just doing my part. The thought of abandoning any of these people—”

“—Even that Horgus Gwerm guy?”, Seelah interrupted, eyes shining mirthfully.

Minovae couldn’t help but snort in response, eyebrows waggling as she rolled her eyes. “Yes, even that selfish sense of ego with legs, and the sentient cockroach that is Count Arendae. Abandoning any of them to the demons feels like… it feels like… betrayal…”

The word came to her unwittingly, supplied by the void of memory deep within her. A betrayal of all you believe in. 

Seelah sat up straighter at that. She crossed her arms, and beamed at Minovae challengingly.

“Well, there you have it then. Does it matter who you were and what awful things you might have done if this is who you are now?”

It does. It most definitely does, she wanted to say. Some crimes cannot be repaid with service, no matter how good. Seelah’s expression, though, so reassuringly confident and beaming as it was, stilled the words on her tongue, just as the true meaning of the question in light of the story she’d entrusted her with did. 

“...I suppose you’re right”, she said instead, turning her attention back towards polishing the breastplate to a gleaming shine. “Minovae the maybe-once-cultist and Seelah the once-helmet-thief, what a heroic pair we make.”

Seelah chuckled again. “Even saying that, I don’t think you were a cultist. If anything, I think you were much similar to me than you realize, atheism be damned.”

That soured her mood all over again. It wasn’t a joke either, she could tell that for certain. Seelah hadn’t said it in the joking voice. She’d been entirely serious about it.

Minovae snorted derisively. “I was not a paladin, I can assure you of that.”

“No?”, Seelah challenged, at the same time exchanging one clean pauldron for the one still in need of treatment. “You know how to fight demons. You’re braver than most every other Crusader I’ve ever met. You have a sense of justice and goodness like any of my brothers and sisters. And, you call out orders and tactics so clearly in combat that even Camellia falls into line without question.”

Minovae listened with increasing annoyance as Seelah listed off each example as if it were concrete proof. The breastplate beneath her oil rag squeaked from the growing force with which she polished it. 

“None of those things are unique to paladins, you know”, she asserted.

“They aren’t, and normally I would agree with you”, Seelah nodded. “If it was just one of those things. But all of them?”, she clicked her tongue and chuckled. “Who knows, maybe ol’ Seelah will rub off on you.”

Minovae didn’t deign the unintended insult with a response, save for reminding her that she was most likely the older of the two. If there was one thing she knew for sure about herself, she most definitely had not been a paladin. The thought of serving the gods filled her with disgust, and it took another invitation of that cool restraint to keep the outrage of Seelah insisting on such a thing from gaining too much of a foothold. 

But it did do one thing, at least. Thinking more on it, it wasn’t just the gods that the thought of serving sent her reeling. It was any divine power—demon lords included. 

Meaning, she absolutely had not been a cultist.

The relief carried into her previously uplifted mood from before. She felt herself grinning again, and as she nodded in approval at her handiwork of the cleaned and polished armor reassembled in her hands, a mischievously dark thought crossed into her mind.

“Hmm, you don’t think it’s infectious, do you?”, she purposefully held the armor aloft, turning it around as she examined herself in the shine to catch Seelah’s attention. She felt the paladin’s questioning gaze alight on her, and continued before she could speak. “I won’t be struggling to spell the name of my ‘Lord and Savior, Baphomet’ like the cutlists we ran into when we picked up Nenio the second I put this on, right?”

Her gaze flitted past the armor to Seelah’s, who now looked at her with scrunched-brow concern over an uncomfortable half-smile. Minovae had learned pretty quickly in the paladin’s company that while she had a sense of humor, it wasn’t nearly as dark nor morbid as her own. She appreciated lighthearted jokes and optimism. Her own strayed way closer to gallows humor.

“Are… are you joking that you’ll become a cultist just because you salvaged some armor they had probably stolen themselves?”

Minovae pursed her lips, and pointedly returned her focus to the armor in question. “You never know, Seelah. What if the previous owner was the original cultist? And the guy we killed earlier had just been some bookmaker or something looking for some protection? Then, bam!—”, she rapped her knuckles across the polished breastplate for effect, “—suddenly cultist.”

She saw Seelah’s jaw drop out of focus. “What!? No! That’s absurd, Minnow! People don’t just start serving demon lords because of something like that!”

“Is it? Well where else do all these cultists come from, then?”, she challenged, leading Seelah along to the line of thought she hoped would make her choke on that insistence that she’d been a paladin, or would be, enough so that she’d never think it ever again. “You don’t think they just talk to would-be prospects? ‘Hey! I saw you’re a right backstabbing son of a bitch. You’ll make for a great champion of Baphomet! Want to enlist?’ ‘Sure thing! I’m so glad you asked! I will adopt an entirely new way of life now, just like that!’”

Seelah’s mouth opened, about to retort, only for realization to halt the words before they could come out. She grumbled, pressing her lips together with an annoyed expression before breathing a deep sigh.

“I get it, sheesh. You don’t have to compare me to a cultist recruitment scheme just to get to drop the paladin talk, though.You could have just asked.”

Minovae merely leaned forward and clapped Seelah on the shoulder with a wry smirk. “This leaves a much more lasting impression.”

[peachyfnaf]

im really not having a lot of fun watching sams/laes anymore and it's just making me rather sad. so. this post is me yapping about that- under the cut in case someone doesnt wanna see it (and i have a tag to block if peeps dont wanna see my saltier/more discourse-ridden takes in general lmao)

tbch, i feel a bit bad about it. or not really Bad, just upset n' angry n' annoyed that im no longer getting as much joy out of watching the shows as i used to. it does a big hit to The Tism which normally clings onto these shows like a leech dhfssdfgd

i think i've made my opinions on the current arc blatantly clear to anyone who's seen me post about it before, but in case someone Hasn't, let it be known i do not like this arc. i hate it. i hate what they did to nexus/new moon, i hate how it's being handled, i hate how some of the other characters are being treated/are acting, i hate how the fandom has become so split over this arc that you almost have to pick a side and can only make friends on that side. i hate it.

anytime its a silly episode i have the gnawing thought of 'nexus is out there. perhaps being manipulated by dark sun or falling further into villainy, or something even worse.' in the back of my mind, so i can barely focus on the silly and just start thinking about nexus instead. and sometimes the silly episodes just bore me or contradict themselves or make me worried for the future. (ie, for the last one, some things that are nothing but silly jokes in the moment- such as frank- can later be considered legit serious and lore important things down the line, so i always have to keep my guard up a lil bit even around silly episodes. its rather exhausting).

and anytime its a lore ep im just not interested in it bc im more curious as to whats going on in other parts of the lore. ofc i mainly mean nexus, but im also curious about eclipse and what he's plotting. about the astrals, specifically lunar v taurus. i simply dont see the content i was hoping to see, and its been happening back-to back-to back-to back now on these two channels. so, it's starting to become unfun/boring for me.

not to mention that i just Miss the vibby games- i miss the video games very, very much and i am constantly angered at the higher ups for making the va's do more lore both because all this lore is grating and im also highkey worried for the va's. idk how stressful it must be to film lore for basically every day, but i'd bet its not the best thing in the world. i fear for even worse burn-out.

overall, this, to me, is just not a fun time in these two shows rn and im really thinking about just Ignoring this arc completely in my own canon and instead focus on past lore/silly videos. like i'll prolly still theorize about what's next and watch the eps just bc i like hearing their voices, but ive gotten past the "im angry at this for fun" phase and am more into the "im not angry anymore, just bored, sad, and disappointed with how things are turning out," phase.

i miss my wife, (sams/laes before this arc) tails. i miss her a lot

[loveislandthegame]

Is anywhere else doing a sapphic route. I'm so bored that I feel like crying. All het players are exploring their options. Not only are the writers making it seem like my MC is playing the game but I have to watch my LI with someone else for months. Why is it that seasons that treat sapphic players poorly always happen to be fan favourites? I really wish the fandom could have our backs at least once mate. Literally nobody seems to care that LGBT players are getting forked over again. Can't we have a female LI appreciation month or something?

i've seen a few people who are doing claudia/bea routes! i love claud but i do hate how the game treats MC like a hoe for pursuing her when i have been loyal...to her . not to mention all the dialogue about theo & OG LI/casa guy getting pissed off every single time i flirt with her during challenges . it's getting old

there's only 9 episodes left, today's recoupling should've been a chance to actually get with the LI we want . instead we're forced to be with OG LI (or casa guy) all while he's being like "i know you have a thing with claudia...🥺" (i miss season 3 more than ever, being able to couple up with a girl in the second recoupling was amazing, should've been the standard going forward. idk why FB decided to regress)

heavy on the boredom. over half of the drama is centered around OG LI & MC . i think the only way i could make it possibly clearer i don't want him is to dive into the code & rewrite the damn game myself. and don't even get me started on sienna

with the amount of times the game prompts you to choose your "main LI," she could've easily been a bi rival that grafts on whoever you chose (like how valentina can take najuma on a date, not just the guys) of course that wouldn't fix her being annoying and one-dimensional, but at least i'd actually have a reason to care.

(it sucks that wlw players already have so few options to begin with, only to be further limited by having to choose one, way before you have to lock in a male LI . in one of my volume recaps i mentioned how the game was already forcing us to choose between claudia and bea)

i think this season is great if you're on a loyal OG LI route (or just burning the villa lol) and at this point it's just unpleasant for literally anyone else. i wish the same, & i try to call out anything "problematic," idk a better word for it, basically FB's piss poor representation of LGBT and islanders of colour. but i'm only one person, and unfortunately a lot of the fandom has more smoke for sienna than anything

and i think that lack of pressure put on FB to do better is why they're perfectly content with screwing over wlw players (not to mention i've seen some people who shrug it off as "well the show is based on straight couples!🤷🏽" ... even though the game barely follows the show anymore, but i digress)

i just hope that theo romancers (& ppl that wanted their casa LI but got stuck with their OG) who are rightfully mad as well are enough for FB to realise how stupid of a decision this was. being extremely generous and assuming the final recoupling is gonna be right at the beginning in the next episode...we'll have, at most, 9 episodes to be in an official couple with our LI. almost 1/5th of the entire season 🙄🙄🙄

an appreciation month for the ladies would be lovely though . i don't have any experience with organising stuff like that but june/pride month is in 2 months ! 👀

[arkiwii]

for the ask game: 8 (a quote that means a lot to you), 1 (the moment you started shipping your otp), and 17 (a worldbuilding aspect you have the greatest admiration for)

Fandom (8)

I can't just not quote my favorite quote from NoriZC's scrappaper collection on Saria and Silence's arts; "Because grass and rocks always complement each other over time." It's just beautiful, simple, it's peak, I love it. But it's not in the game or canon so let's throw it away

I really like Frostnova's song, Lullaby - and my favorite quote in this song is "In your dream, in your dream, are you seeing formidable adventures? How will you grow up, little one? Who will protect you?" (Unofficial translation but I like the wording better) It just. Speaks to me to a level I can't imagine. The fear of growing up, to be alone, to have to face the world and life by yourself

And if we don't count songs, a quote I LOVE from Reed's module's story: "Ever since, the fire never truly went out. It burned within (their) eyes, inside (their) heart, in the night of every festivity. [...] Slowly, (they) became used to the heat, to the scorching that stabbed through (their) body with each breath. (They) believed this undying flame would be with (them) for life, even chasing (them) in death. Until (they) received this present. (They) realizes, and it startles (them). So there were people who'd still try to put water on these raging flames." (I they/them Reed, apologizes) It's just beautiful I think, the metaphor of the fire as their pain, and people who cares about them, trying to put it out. It's beautiful

Fandom (1)

OK THIS IS FUN BECAUSE. The answer is before I ever started the game. A friend of mine showed me some characters, specifically Liberi, because they know I love birds SO MUCH. And they showed me Silence, I immediately fell in love with her design. So they told me a bit more about her, mostly how she had a child and was incredibly divorced from Saria. The thing is. I thought it was canon. Like that they REALLY were divorced, canonically. I simply got a lot of affection for these characters and aimed to get them in game, all together.

But if we speak about when I really really started to get into it, my very first ship fanart of Sariasil was done in March 19th this year, so like a month or two after I started the game? And oh god I never stopped drawing them since then

If anyone wonders, this is the first art I drew of them, I never posted it as it was done before creating this blog. Notice how my artstyle changed AHAH

Fandom (17)

Everything. No seriously, how am I supposed to pick only one.

There's many aspects I love but it's just, how all of them just answer to each other, how this world lives, outside of the main story, how everything is linked together and how the world move. I admire this as someone who tries to build a world for a story.

But if I have to pick one, I'd say the political stuff behind each faction. I suck at politics, so I admire this a lot. Arknights has been a huge inspiration for my own project, and I started to think more about politics in my own universe. Just like what I said above, each has consequences, each has influence, and that's how this world lives.

And most of all, each artist behind have their own part, they work together and create this world together, and that's beautiful to me

[cleoselene]

I started up Interview With the Vampire because y'all have been getting to me with the memes, and then my good bitch @sandushengshou informed me that the first season was up on Netflix. Which, you know, I could pirate it but I'm lazy! And I can leech off roommate's account, so having easy access I don't have to download and put on a flash drive that I stick in my tv is good bonus motivation.

Well I'm only like 20 minutes in and it's already totally engaging. I never read the books but I did see the films. Loved the Tom Cruise one, but thought Brad Pitt's acting was wooden, terrible boring bland. It was sad, because everyone else in that movie was pretty delightful. Tom Cruise and Kirsten Dunsten were fantastic! And then there was Brad Pitt. I read once that Cher was almost cast as Louis, and well, Cher's a much better actor than Brad Pitt, I'd have been there for it.

BUT! Jacob Anderson is great so far and interesting and lively and not like some guy reciting lines! And we've just met Lestat, who I know the fandom has enjoyed, and he's been fun so far. I'm read for this to be a rolicking good time.

I spent the whole day in World of Warcraft: The War Within and my Arcane Mage is level 73. I figured it was enough for one day, lol, I don't need to burn through the content. It's really fun to play on release weekend though! I've never done that! Back when I first started playing it was like, people camping out at Gamestop at Midnight to buy it. The game is sooooo different and yet the same in all the right ways.

One of the reasons I dipped out around Legion was that they were talking about cutting back on flying/phasing out flying in future expansions, or that was the rumor, and I thought that was fucking shitty, but now I'm back after several years and lol. yeah, not only have they not phased it out, they've gone harder on it, and getting to fly immediately and not when I reach max level in the expansion is certainly a change philosophy. I wonder if other players hated it the talk of moving away from flying as much as I do. I never bought the alleged idea that "if you're on a flying mount you're not appreciating all this beautiful scenery we coded" because we still spend a large amount of our time on the ground doing stuff.

I'm still obsessing over the WoW version of Pokemon. Up to 1086 battle pets, and somehow keep slipping on my server standing even though I've moved up about 5k spots on the site ranking. Proudmoore has always been a super competitive Pokemon server. BACK IN THE DAY, I was like #7 on the server. I actually had someone on tumblr back when I very first joined be all "YOU! YOU HAVE BEEN MY ARCHNEMESIS ON WARCRAFT PETS! YOU KEEP PASSING ME, I KEEP PASSING YOU!" It was validating lol.

[readychilledwine]

💜 Get to know me 💜

I figured this is a little overdue. I just wanted to introduce myself a little:

The personal real life things:

My name is Elizabeth, and I'm 27. (Old for the fanfiction writing world to some, the perfect age to others.) My friends call me Liz. I've been reading fanfiction since the dark day of Quizilla, and I've been writing it since high school, so over 10 years.

It started with me writing it for my friends and adding them into stories to allow them to live out their fantasies with characters they loved and adored. After a pretty serious car accident that left me bedridden for over a month last year, I started writing it for me for escapism. The number of stories hidden in my Google Drive is insane, lovelies.

I recently started posting due to my pregnancy, which, according to my partner, only happened because I wouldn't stop reading fairyporn, on here and in books. Fairyporn he now also reads (blows on nails before cleaning them on my shirt.) Due to pregnancy, I've been home more after making the choice to switch my hours at work to allow us to adapt and prep for the arrival of our little.

The stories and writing

I consider myself part of several Fandoms and would take requests for any of the following:

✨️ Lord of the Rings / The Tolkien Universe

✨️ACOTAR and the SJM Universe

✨️Harry Potter

✨️The Bargainer Series

✨️Game of Thrones / House of Dragons

✨️ The Witcher Series

✨️ Percy Jackson

✨️ The MCU

Please just keep in mind, we may not like the same characters, so I cannot promise a mind blowing adventure for every sutuation. I will post a characters I love writing for breakdown in each Fandom if asked for enough.

I will write the following

🥵 smut (please see rules)

❤️ Fluff

🥺 Angst

🥰 platonic relationships

Tropes I ADORE

🥰 Fated Mates

🥰 Grumpy Sunshine

🥰 Mutual Pinning

🥰 Enemies to Lovers

🥰 Friends to Lovers

🥰 Slow. Mother fing. Burn

🥰 Second Chance Romance

🥰 Revenge F

Tropes I dislike (but am open to writing)

😑 forced proximity or marriage

😑 one bed (seriously. Imagine. You've been traveling for hours. No food. No rest. No shower. You're fucking exhausted. You aren't banging the person laying with you. I'm sorry but you're not.)

😑 damsel/daddy in distress

😑 pregnancy

Tropes I absolutely will NOT write:

😞 bully turned lover

😞 step siblings/parent trope

😞 minors in grooming situations

😞 changing sexual preferences due to a bad experience

😞 Tropes relating to me making a known character cheat with my OC/Reader characters - I will write my fake character being cheated on, though

😞 Too dumb to live (I do not like using females as plot points for male characters)

Rules regarding smut

✔️ I will not write smut for characters who are underage in the universe they reside in. Meaning, I won't be feeding the Percy Jackson lovers, Harry Potter Lovers, or some cannon GOT/HOTD lovers smut. I am personally uncomfortable aging up characters for the sole purpose of making a smut scene for them. I do not care if the actor playing them was 18+. Daniel Radcliffe may have been 22 in the last Harry Potter film, but Harry was 17 at the beginning. I am more than happy to do romance with underage characters, though.

✔️ I do not have many kinks I consider hard boundaries, but I will not write water sports, scat play, or anything of that nature. Most other things are fair game. I am active in the kink scene, lovelies. If I haven't played with a kink you'd like written, I have a friend who probably has and will help me. Send me those anonymous messages, and let's bring your fantasy to writing.

✔️ I will write monster fics

✔️ I will write orgies, 3somes, 4somes, all the somes, swapsomes

✔️ I will write ff/mf/ffm/mmf, I will not write mm, simply because I am a female and have not watched two males doing the deed just the two of them. I'd want to do the piece justice and I have no rights to write an emotion/feeling/stimulation I wouldn't understand or have experience with

✔️ I will write dub/con and dark sexual fantasy

Am I open to taking requests?

Do you have a specific question?

Ask me 💜

[bumblepony]

Hi, I was wondering if you could do a kiss prompt for Alexei & Amos from As Nandorluna’s Go Your Own Way & As Long as You Follow. I liked your one short fic of them.

The prompt would be "kiss with trembling lips"

Thank you

This was not as sexy as I first thought I was going to go, but I still liked making it sooo, here we go. I hope you like it, Nonnie.

I am also linking this to my good friend @chronicallyonlinewriter because these are her original characters, and I want to make sure she is happy with this little slice of story I slipped into her universe.

If anyone is interested in reading her work I highly recommend it, it's one of my favorite series in TLOU fanfic fandom here is the link People Still Listen to Fleetwood Mac in the Apocalypse

Story under the cut!

“Alexei?” Amos’s voice called sleep-rough from down the hall, a familiar sound that always managed to stir something soft in Alexei. Normally, after hearing it, he would drag whatever book he was reading back to the bedroom and cuddle up under the covers with Amos’s pleasant warmth pressed along his side. But today, Alexei didn’t have time. He’d already spent too many days away from the hospital, and he needed to get back. He shoved another book into his bag.

“In here.” He called, then mumbled quietly to himself as he looked around him, making sure he’d grabbed everything.

“What are you doing?” Amos asked, his confusion clear in his tone. Alexei looked up at his husband, tall and mussed, standing in the doorway. His T-shirt wrinkled, one leg of his sweatpants hiked up just below his knee, and the wild red curls of his hair half falling out of the low ponytail he usually put it in for bed. His shockingly blue eyes were tired but sharp as he took in Alexei’s actions.

“I have to get back to the hospital. I’m already so behind… on everything.” He sighed, his mind already cataloging all the different experiments that were waiting for his hand, each at a different stage of completion that only he could correctly handle.

His mind was so taken by his musings that he didn’t realize Amos had moved until his hand was over the top of his own. Strong fingers stopped his relentless packing and repacking of his bag. Placing his thumb and pointer finger under Alexei’s chin, Amos turned his face to his.

“Alexei, stop. What are you doing?” Amos asked again, his voice low, desperate. Alexei’s eyes skate over his worried face, his bushy brows pulled down over his dark circled eyes, mouth creased into a thin line between his scruffy beard. “You nearly died less than a week ago, I thought… Jesus, when I got the call, I thought that was it. I rushed to the hospital, sure I’d be too late, sure all I’d be able to do was hold your already cooling hand as they told me you were gone. But by some fucking miracle, you were still alive. My beautiful, reckless, stubborn husband was still alive.” Amos’s hand came up and brushed away a lock of silver hair from his forehead before he leaned in and placed a trembling kiss on his lips. Alexei could feel Amos’s hand also shake, where it rested on his face, and guilt sprang up hot and acidic from his gut.

“Alexei, you look like shit. You’ve been burning yourself at both ends since we got here. And I understand, I really do, I know how important this is for you, for us, for everyone.” Amos took a deep breath and placed his forehead against Alexei’s, “But, Alexei, I need you. Do you understand? If-if you do find a way to make a cure, but I end up losing you in the process because you’ve run yourself down to the bone, then none of it will have been worth it for me.” Amos pressed his lips to Alexei’s once more, so fiercely that their teeth clacked against one another. He held himself there, his breaths harsh and sharp against Alexei’s lips before pulling away and piercing him with his gaze. “Do you understand Alexei? None of this is worth it without you.”

Alexei knew the heart attack had scared Amos. It had scared him, too. But hearing that fear in Amos’s voice, feeling it in his touch, finally forced him to see that his life meant something beyond his ability to make a cure. His wellbeing mattered to Amos, and he had not been taking care of himself.

“Amos, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize…” Alexei stammered and lifted his hands to rest on Amos’s shoulders, needing to feel his solid frame under his palms. 

“Well, you do now, so I need you to take care of yourself. This was a wake-up call, and I need you to listen to it, please,” Amos said and pulled away to take Alexei’s bag and shove it under the desk. One last clear message that Amos did not plan on letting Alexei go anywhere today. 

“Okay, Amos. Okay, I will.” Alexei laughed weakly. His earlier need to be back at work spilled out of him in a rush and left him feeling raw and exhausted.

“Good then. Good.” Amos ran a shaking hand through his already chaotic curls, his tone surprised as if he had expected more of a fight and then reached down to take Alexi’s hand. “Come back to bed. I know you’ll have to go back eventually, but can we work all that out tomorrow?”

Alexei laced his fingers with Amos’s and reached out his other hand to gently smooth down Amos' jaw, the rough scrape of his scruff a calming sensation against his palm. “Of course, sweetheart. It can wait.”

“C’mon,” Amos tugged him from the little office and back to their warm, comfortable bed.