#(( yes this does have consequences and is part of why she acts the way that she does

[royalreef]

(( Merfolk are hypersocial macropredators. This shouldn't be new information to anyone on my blog, but the sheer extent of merfolk sociability cannot be overstated. Their social nature is the entire reason they were able to become and specialize into macropredatory niches in the way that they have. Their close relatives, the leviathans, are an excellent example of what merfolk might have become if they didn't have their intense communal proclivities — being much more typical, expected examples of a secondarily aquatic large marine predator akin to marine reptiles of the past and whales of the present. Without their social bindings, merfolk might have entirely lost their hands for flippers, would lack their heightened connection to sound and language, and certainly wouldn't have shaped the ecosystems and the world they inhabit in the same way.

For this, merfolk relationships are complicated. They started as a way of forming a simple hunting group and handling life in large colonies, but as merfolk specialized further, so too did their relationships. More and more they focused on interpersonal politics and the complications of maintaining a large social group that was constantly evolving and shifting, which fostered the growth of their intelligence and sapience, which then led back even moreso into needing the ability to maintain and keep up with their relationships.

A merfolk in isolation is not a merfolk at all. While the exactness of this thought varies across their different cultures, it still holds true for all of them. On a literal level, merfolk can and do die of loneliness, their social needs as much of a requirement to them as the need for food or water. If you were to isolate a merfolk, to the point where they could not hear nor see anyone else, then they would endure a brutal one or two weeks, and then die. Every other need can be met, they can be otherwise entirely healthy, but without anyone else around, they cannot live.

On the more metaphorical level, a merfolk cannot exist solely on their own. Most merfolk cultures accept that the individual does not exist, and that there has to be some outside dialogue with other merfolk in order for them to even be alive. The self and identity are inherently plural to them, a multifaceted soul which exists in the bodies and lives of merfolk in a group, and which can't be broken down. Maintaining relationships and fostering them is as essential as feeding yourself, or feeding someone else.

For all of this, merfolk require much higher amounts of social interaction and connection. This is not to say that introverted merfolk do not exist, but they would be introverted by the measure of their fellow merfolk, and not by what humans might judge them to be. Much like how even the most introverted human could not endure the life of a solitary snake or spider, an introverted merfolk could not endure the life of an introverted human. Similarly, even an extroverted human could not compare against an extroverted merfolk.

Likewise, not every social interaction is the same to merfolk, and they maintain different emotional connections with different people, fulfilling a wider assortment of social needs. In fact, it is easiest to think of merfolk social structure as being like one large, interwoven, piece of lace, where each individual merfolk is represented by a single knot. They are all tied together into larger pieces, repeating patterns, all working together to create a singular, complex web of all the ways every merfolk is connected to every other merfolk.

For this, merfolk have different names for each different pattern, each different part at different scales and sizes. All are important, even if some are closer and tied nearer to the individual merfolk in question, and require greater maintenance to keep healthy.

These patterns and connections are, by far, what is most important to a merfolk. While merfolk are fully capable of experiencing platonic, familial, romantic, and sexual connections, it should be stated that this is not what the relationship hierarchy is based off of. They might be a part of that connection, but the connection itself and the place it occupies within the hierarchy is of far greater importance to a merfolk, to the extent that all else pales before it. Any point and connection within this web might be platonic, or familial, or romantic, but even a romantic connection to a merfolk might mean nothing against a platonic or familial connection if the latter outranks the former on their hierarchy of relationships.

Hence, from the smallest unit to the largest, this is (approximately) what the merfolk hierarchy of relationships looks like:

Yuu'itv + Ul’kiha

This can be thought of as the singular knot, as the individual merfolk themselves. This is what is most familiar to landfolk, as it typically does not refer to any more than one merfolk.

To the merfolk themselves, however, this is more theoretical and functional than a real part of their relationship hierarchy to be maintained. This is the building block of identity, the pieces which make up one true self, but pieces which are not as concerning or deserving of as much time as the selfhood itself.

The exception, as you might have noticed, is the inclusion of ul'kiha at this rung. Ul'kiha (in the common-technical language) is loosely translated as the water that runs through someone's gills, but in the plural. Less literally, it refers to a shared breath, a breathing as one. A shared body, in less flowery terms. Soulmates, in the easiest localization.

In short, an ul'kiha is another merfolk and individual who is so close to another merfolk that they are thought of as one person. A plural-becoming-singular, if you might. Other merfolk will treat two ul'kiha as the same person, talk to them as the same person, view their relationships to them as one person. It represents the tightest, closest bond any merfolk can have.

For this, ul'kiha are rare. Most merfolk will never take an ul'kiha in their lives, and for those that do, taking more than one is next to unheard of. Ul'kiha is, likewise, the only instance where a rung in the relationship hierarchy is solely romantic, and the only true crossover between the relationship hierarchy and humanity's views on relationships. While half of ul'kiha will refuse to take any other romantic partner, this is not comparable to marriage either, as the intensity of this connection could be thought of as codependent in a way that's natural for merfolk but doesn't occur in human relationships. While ul'kiha can split up, if one ul'kiha dies and the other doesn't, the living partner is expected to never take another ul'kiha again, and quite often the loss is enough to kill them too.

Miivt'ia

These are the first few knots the initial knot is tied to, and the first true rung on the relationship hierarchy.

In a sense, the miivt'ia is a merfolk's inner circle. These are the people who they are closest to in their lives, who they have a unique and potent bond with. A miivt'ia, likewise, is a group which is exclusive to itself, and all the members of a miivt'ia will feel the same way about each other, and count themselves in each other's miivt'ia.

The closest example we might have to what a miivt'ia is would be the concept of a friend polycule. None of the members inside a miivt'ia are exclusively platonic, familial, romantic, nor sexual with each other, but they have a tight and exclusive bond which is solely shared amongst each other. In fact, each member of the miivt'ia might feel differently about every other member of the miivt'ia and have their own, unique dynamic with every other member, but all are united in the closeness given by being members of the miivt'ia.

Miivt'ia are often formed right as a merfolk is first growing up. Family members can be included in the miivt'ia, but not always, and those included are almost always siblings, cousins, or others who are similarly close in age. Childhood friendships that begin to deepen often become a part of the miivt'ia, as are the most serious of relationships. However, miivt'ia can also be created outside of these formative years, and there are many miivt'ia that essentially act like guilds or a "family" business, being closer than mere coworkers but sharing the same job.

Miivt'ia are the people with whom a merfolk has near-constant contact with. They are expected to live together, and often will share the same job, or similar jobs. All of their personal belongings are considered as belonging to the miivt'ia over any individual, and legally the miivt'ia is the individual upon which laws apply to. A merfolk without a miivt'ia is effectively homeless, and spiritually merfolk consider the miivt'ia to be the soul. Merfolk that go through the Coral Festival (Habp'll pl'qe ane'jhe Oikahj) will go through it together with their miivt'ia. Any children the miivt'ia has or adopts is considered the child of everyone else in the miivt'ia, the members all acting as parents and considering themselves equally as responsible in the care for that child. Miivt'ia are not only expected to be constantly in contact with each other and to participate in everything together, but they are expected to care equally about every other member of the miivt'ia and to feel each other's emotions as one.

For all of this, merfolk are highly loyal to their miivt'ia and will defend the members of their miivt'ia with their life. Any threat to any other member of the miivt'ia is considered a direct threat to all other members and to the individual merfolk's lives, and the loss of any member of the miivt'ia is mourned by all others to the highest degree.

There is a lot of responsibility placed upon those included in the miivt'ia, but the miivt'ia also has an emotional closeness and intimacy that isn't shared by any other merfolk in the relationship hierarchy (except the ul'kiha, see above). Being too overtly close and intimate with a merfolk can be seen as not respecting the miivt'ia and be seen as a threat to the security of the miivt'ia. Likewise, if someone wishes to join a miivt'ia, they will often endure a "courting" phase with all the members of the miivt'ia, where they attempt to forge connections equally as close to and intimate with every other member.

Dhe'jny'p usae

If the miivt'ia was the smallest initial pattern any relationship can have in the larger weave, then the dhe'jny'p usae is the actual shape of that pattern, when something becomes not just an oval, but a petal on a flower.

Dhe'jny'p usae, in common-technical language, is closest translated to "drift family". Humans might recognize the dhe'jny'p usae as being something similar to friends. They are not as close as the miivt'ia, but they might represent the next nearest thing, being a close emotional connection with associated responsibilities. The dhe'jny'p usae would be the closest other miivt'ia to the existing miivt'ia, acting as neighbors or close-knit family. If the miivt'ia had children, then they would be expected to provide care and look after those children alongside their own, and would cycle wider, communal responsibilities with the miivt'ia. Miivt'ia and members of the miivt'ia would hang out with and spend a lot of time with their dhe'jny'p usae, and this forms the base of wider merfolk sociability.

While the dhe'jny'p usae would be excluded from the private, domestic matters of the miivt'ia, they might still be gone to for emotional reassurance, or to simply have someone to talk to. Dhe'jny'p usae are expected to help in providing food for each other, and will switch out communal duties that require a layer of intimacy with each other, and legally are considered very similar entities. While they wouldn't share all personal belongings like the miivt'ia, they might share what counts for money, and be responsible for dividing it up among themselves. Dhe'jny'p usae, likewise, might live together in larger communal houses and share chores among themselves, but this might be considered closer to the individual members of a household, and its not as intensely expected for them to live together as the miivt'ia.

Dhe'jny'p usae are likewise the most common place to find what we might think of as typical merfolk romantic relationships. Dhe'jny'p usae more easily come and go, leaving and entering a merfolk's life, not solely remaining there for life like the miivt'ia, and for that, it's not uncommon for merfolk to have romantic and sexual relationships with their dhe'jny'p usae.

Faa'nek hus'llu

If the dhe'jny'p usae were the equivalent to people living in the same house, the faa'nek hus'llu is closer to the neighbors. These are acquaintances, support-friends, those that they are close to, though they maintain a degree of separation. If the dhe'jny'p usae was a flower, then this is the daisy chain, the interlocking patterns which form a distinct function.

More than anything else, the faa'nek hus'llu can be thought of as the connective tissue. They bridge the gap between the intensely bound and closely connected dhe'jny'p usae and miivt'ia, and the wider social community of merfolk. They do not bear the brunt of the emotional responsibility and are free to come and go in any merfolk's life as they please, but there is still a degree of familiarity here, a sense of belonging. While dhe'jny'p usae might live in the same communal house, faa'nek hus'llu live in the same town, neighborhood, community. The responsibilities they bear are far more physical, often serving as shifting turns for communal guard or repair duties, ensuring that everyone gets their turn taking care of everyone else.

The downside is that faa'nek hus'llu enjoy far less emotional connection and intimacy. What is shared and offered is far more obvious and physical, and far less detailed than that which other, closer relationships would receive. They might know someone is tired, and they might know someone is in grief after losing a member of their miivt'ia, but they wouldn't be able to navigate the emotional complexity beneath that. Trying to do so can be seen as a threat, either to your own dhe'jny'p usae and miivt'ia, or to theirs, demanding familiarity which has not been earned nor received.

A'antiu Muur'l

This is the far end of any merfolk's immediate social connections. The a'antiu muur'l is not merely the knot, nor the petal, nor the flower, nor the daisy chain, but the sides of the lace itself, the largest part that fits together with all others.

This is the community as a whole. It is a town, a city, a city-block, more of a legal entity than a social one but a social one nonetheless. The a'antiu muur'l is far more location-based than the other rungs on the relationship hierarchy, and merfolk only truly change their a'antiu muur'l with a change of physical location. The a'antiu muur'l is the community from which community names are given, and the a'antiu muur'l is to the commonfolk what a royal lineage is to a royal.

The a'antiu muur'l in common-technical best translates to "song family", and to a merfolk, this is because it is intended to include everyone that a single merfolk might hear at any given time. They are strangers to the individual merfolk, sure, but they are all singing together and speaking at the same time, and working to build the same song together to flesh out life and the place in which they live, so there is a degree of emotional connection. It is abstracted emotional connection, yes, but it is emotional connection all the same.

Merfolk might even include physical landmarks as part of their a'antiu muur'l, such as in the case of their singing buildings, or for a particularly endearing local landmark. This can include a large reef, or mountain, or entire mountain range, but so too can it include the one weird shady area where all the kids hang out that the adults don't want them near.

Ghray Uw'ghta Faahl

In common-technical language, the ghray uw'ghta faahl means "all-body". It is far more theoretical than the others, being spoken of to promote a sense of universal connection, but is not something that's quite so easily envisioned in turn.

In essence, the ghray uw'ghta faahl refers to all merfolk. All of their connections, each a'antiu muur'l, each faa'nek hus'llu, each dhe'jny'p usae, each miivt'ia, and each yuu'itv. Each and every merfolk is included, down through time, because each and every merfolk has had an emotional connection, and thus each and every merfolk fits into the ghray uw'ghta faahl.

Thus, the responsibilities here are far more abstracted, and far more represent the responsibilities all merfolk have to each other. This includes their hospitality culture, yes, but far moreso it includes a sense a dignity and a need to recognize that each merfolk has someone else and belongs somewhere within the ghray uw'ghta faahl. It's a source of recognition, and of community, and of understanding.

How much it actually fulfills that role, as ever, varies, but the thought and theory and gesture is still there, all the same.

[icequeenlila]

So, it's pretty much a standard in the fandom that Lo'ak is described to be an exact copy of his dad, while Neteyam is the exact copy of his mum, right?

It's arguabel on the looks. I just think they share traits of both their parents but that's also not what this post is about.

I want to speak on the character traits the boys share with their parents.

Lo'ak is always made out to be a mini Jake. He's reckles just like his dad when he was young. He doesn't listen, has a big mouth, just like Jake. Yes.

But.

He shares one crucial trait with his mother. One that makes a big part of his character.

Neytiri and Lo'ak are both easily provoked. They are short tempered and impulsive when it comes to their family and loved ones.

Example: Lo'ak picking a fight with Aonung after he insulted Kiri. Just like Neytiri snapped at Ronal after she disrespected Jake. Neither of them thinking about possible consequences.

They both act without thinking, just jumping to defend their loved ones. In hindsight both realize their actions haven't been so wise but in that moment of anger they act on their feelings.

And then there is Jake and Neteyam. Both of them are able to stay level headed when faced with stressful situations.

While Jake used to be reckless in his youth, he was never as short tempered as Neytiri. It takes much to make him snap. That's why he is such a good leader. He is able to keep a cool head under pressure, he is able to think straight when angered. He also functions as Neytiri's tether in heated situations, making her calm and refocus.

Neteyam shares this trait with him. He's in full control about his actions. He's willing to let go of the anger he clearly felt when Aonung insulted Kiri, bc he knew of the consequences a fight would take.

You could argue here that that's because he's the oldest. True but his and Lo'ak's age only differ by a year and older siblings are not always this level headed. The goal is to protect the young ones, many don't think ahead of that.

But Neteyam does, because just like his father he thinks in a strategic way.

Example: Neteyam warning Aonung to stay away from Kiri but not acting on his anger and picking a fight, to prevent future difficulties for his family. Jake apologozing on Neytiri's behalf after Ronal disrespected him. He let's the attack on his own person slide, taking the hit to give his family a chance with the Metkayina clan.

They are thinking things through before they act.

I'm not at all saying that the boys share traits with only one of their parents. It's just that these two characteristics stand out a lot, mirroring their parents strongly.

That's it.

Have a nice day and bye!💙✨

[sunny44]

All these years (Part 2)

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Ex girlfriend! Reader

Warnings: bad words, fights and maybe more things

Summary: Separated by a disagreement, Charles and Y/n meet again after years apart and all the feelings they had repressed come flooding back.

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

It was a long journey to Monaco.

My mother wanted me to stay at home and I really didn't want to, so I just arrived at the hotel I was going to stay at.

"What do you mean there's a problem with my accommodation?"

"I'm sorry Miss Y/l/n but your reservation was canceled two days ago."

"I didn't fucking cancel it."

"I did." I turned and saw my mother standing there. "Come on, Y/n."

"I'm sorry." said the receptionist who agreed and I followed my mother outside. "What's wrong with you? I said I didn't want to stay at your house."

"And I said I don't care what you want or don't want."

"So you called the hotel impersonating me and canceled my reservation? How did you know I'd be staying at this hotel?"

"It was obvious that you'd be staying in the hotel closest to us." I rolled my eyes. "Don't roll your eyes at me, young lady."

"Then stop acting like you're the boss of me."

"But I am."

"No, you're not, the moment I moved out of your house and started supporting myself you lost that right and in case you can't count it's been years."

"Get in the car."

"I'm not going home, I told you."

"And I've told you that none of the other hotels will accept you there, so you either stay at home or sleep on the street. Now get in the car."

"I came by car so I don't need your ride."

I got into the car and slammed the door, driving off as fast as I could.

This was another reason why I hated coming here.

My mother.

Ever since Charles and I split up, she turned into this completely cold person, said I'd ruined everything and that I should have said no to the promotion and stayed here.

But her vision of a woman with the perfect life was to be married to a guy who worked to support his wife and kids.

That's what her mother, my grandmother, taught her, and that's why she's always been like that, so she thought I'd fall for it too.

I got home and after parking I saw my father coming out of the house and he smiled when he saw me.

"Hi my love, I've missed you so much."

"I missed you too, Dad." I hugged him tightly and he kissed my forehead.

"Where's your mom?"

"She’s probably coming, I drove here."

"She said she'd pick you up."

"She did, but I drove from Milan so...”

"You had a fight, didn't you?" I agreed. "Love, you have to make things right with her."

"No, she's the one who has to apologize to me." I looked at him. "Since when is a mother disappointed by her daughter's success?"

"She wasn't disappointed in you."

"Yes, she was and you know it, her dream was for me to marry him, get pregnant and live the life of a madam who doesn't do anything the way she does."

"Darling, your mother was raised like that.”

"So was I, but I took different paths, so it's her fault. We decided our own future and she decided hers and I decided mine." he agrees quietly. "Can you believe she canceled my hotel reservation and even called others so they wouldn't accept me just so I'd stay here?"

"Did you do this Jessica?" He asks and I turn around to see my mother standing there.

"You're barely home and you're already causing friction between me and your father, aren't you?"

"There wouldn't be any friction if you didn't do shit like that."

"Look at the way you talk to me in my house," she says angrily.

"I didn't even want to be here, you brought me here so take the consequences."

I picked up my suitcases and took them to my old room. It was completely different, but since I'd taken most of the things that made up my room, it ended up becoming a guest room.

"Y/n." Knocks on the door and enters. "We are having dinner later at the Leclerc's, okay?"

"I don't think I'm going."

"Why not?"

"Kind of obvious, isn't it?" I say and he laughs.

That's what I liked most about my father, he understood my jokes and ironies and was always in a good mood.

"Well, it's up to you, but Arthur asked me to tell you that if you didn't show up he’d come and pick you up."

"Then he'll have to come." My father laughs and leaves.

tag list: @formulas-bitch @nuggetvirgo @lndonrris @cmleitora @janeholt3 @coffeewhore18 @blueflorals @agentadhd @eviethetheatrefreak @honethatty12 @lec-16 @ariamox @boherahpsody @ssararuffoni @leilani13gc @alldaysdreamers @minmira95 @dessxoxsworld @dessxoxsworld

The names with a line above were because I couldn't tag them

[wintervalewritersecond]

siren song || - xavier thorpe

requested: yes! requests: open! second part of siren song! the third part is also out, check my masterlist! ^^

A/N: thank you for the love on siren song! to read part one, click here! i hope you enjoy this part <3 i had to rewrite this considering i accidentally deleted it :')

wordcount: 4.736 warnings: xavier being a bad friend, curse words, slight memory loss, incorrect information about siren song probably, use of weed.

After finally convincing Bianca to use her Siren Song, you get some well-deserved peace in your head. How long does it take for Xavier to notice the changes?

"What?"

The question catches Bianca off guard, not something that happens a lot. Tears are staining your face as you sniff, trying to not start sobbing again.

"Hey, it's okay. Come in."

Her arm is placed on your shoulders as she guides you into her room, placing you on her bed before grabbing her desk chair, sitting next to you.

"What has gotten you so upset?"

You look down at your hands, biting your cheeks as you nervously fiddle with your fingers. You feel embarrassed to sit here, crying in the dorm of your friend that used to be Xaviers girlfriend, but you didn't know anyone that would know how you feel. No one except for Bianca.

"I think Xavier hates me."

"What?" Bianca exclaims shocked. "Why do you think that?"

If there is one thing that Bianca was sure of, it was that Xavier is completely infatuated with you. Even during their relationship, he still made sure to spend some time with you, and Bianca never cared. She trusted both of you, as you became her friend when the relationship was going on. When the couple broke up, your friendship watered down a bit, but you were still both friendly.

"We just had a fight," you whisper. "He never yelled at me like that. Never."

She hands you a tissue, breathing in deeply.

"He has been ignoring me for weeks. He became so obsessed with Wednesday that he did not have any time for me. She- she asked him to the Rave'n and then he found out that she just used him," you ramble. "I asked him to come with me, not even as a real date, but just so he wouldn't be alone. And then he totally ditched me there the second Wednesday came in. The worst thing is, she doesn't even like him. She told me."

How stupid can a boy be? Bianca grits her teeth, shaking her head.

"He is dumb. If there is one thing that he should do, it's to get his head straight. I can't believe that he would do this. Especially after all you have done for him!"

"What if I just become more like Wednesday? I- I can braid my hair? I will even learn to play the cello. He- He said that she was better than me... That I just bother him. Am I too obsessed or- or annoying?"

Even Bianca's heart breaks at that point. The tears are rolling down your face again as you still don't dare to look up at her.

"Am I really that bad of a friend?"

"No!" Bianca immediately responds. "No, Y/N, if anything, you are a great friend. Too good for him. You don't need to be Wednesday to be better. I think she is too emotionless for her own good."

"I wish I was that way," you sigh. "Please, Bianca. If I tell you that I really want it, can you really not use your Song?"

Bianca takes a deep breath, her leg bouncing up and down. Her eyes fall down to the amulet around her neck. It is very against the rules to use her Siren Song, it is something that could get her in a lot of trouble. But, at the same time, she knows exactly how you feel. Xavier is just someone who deserves love, yet he doesn't know how to act around it when someone is literally handing it to him on a silver plate.

Her heart tells her to help you, to give you everything you deserve, but she knows that she also needs to think about the possible consequences. Though your grades have been slipping and your mood has been down for a while now as well. So many factors.

"Y/N, I really don't know."

"What if I consent to it? Surely that must be fine. I- I will sign a contract, even. Write it myself. I- Even only thinking about doing this for me would already be enough."

You must genuinely sound so annoying now, but you know that this will help.

"Why won't you try talking to Kinbott first?"

"I just need something... Something that will work immediately. A Siren Song can always be undone, right?"

"I'm not sure about that," Bianca grimaces. "It's hard, Y/N. I promise you that I will think about it. Just... Try and get some rest, okay?"

-

You had spent the rest of the weekend laying in bed, napping or reading, and sometimes you would head to the Quad to get something to eat. Kent made sure to try and cheer you up, which did work to an extent. You appreciate having a friend like that.

Even from the distance you sit at now, you can still see the figure of Wednesday Addams, sitting alone at her table while writing something down in her notebook. Ajax waves Xavier over to get him to sit at your table but is quickly rejected as the long-haired boy decides to sit with Wednesday. She looks up with the deadliest of looks, though it doesn't seem to phase him at all. Can't he see?

Bianca looks out from the second level of the Quad, spotting both you and Xavier. Not one word is exchanged, though your body language speaks for itself. Your shoulders are slumped and even though Kent tries his hardest to make you laugh, it isn't enough.

Seeing you so upset about someone who doesn't deserve it makes her feel bad. Even in her relationship, she felt like you were more important to Xavier, and that is something she just... Accepted. She never blamed you for it, as Bianca could never really trust Xavier either. But the feelings he has for you are totally real.

After that dinner, you retired back to your room. Yoko would be hanging out with Divina anyway. Just as you let yourself fall on your bed, you hear a knock on the door.

"Coming!"

You kick your bag underneath your bed before walking up to the door, opening it to reveal a Bianca behind it.

"I will only do it after you agree to all the consequences."

She walks in as you close the door behind her, trailing after her.

"You're serious?"

"You deserve to have some peace, Y/N. God knows I wish someone could have done this for me when I was in your situation. I will tell you every consequence," Bianca looks at you sternly. "And I have some conditions."

"Yeah- Yeah totally."

Bianca sits down at your desk, handing you a pen and paper.

"You are to write down that you agree with the Siren Song. I can't just use it whenever I want. Principal Weems will have my head if she finds out."

"Anything, Bianca."

You start writing, still listening to the siren as she explains everything.

"I can genuinely not say if I am able to undo the Song. There is a high likelihood that it will not return to you and Xavier being best friends. I also do not know what to do if this news ever reaches Weems. No one knows that we are planning to do this, no one except for us."

"I promise you, I will take all the blame," you nod, a weak smile on your face. "It is the least I can do."

"Are you sure you want to do this?" She looks at you, her eyebrows stuck in a frown. "It's not something small. You deserve much better than how Xavier acts now."

"I- Yeah. I thought about it all day yesterday. I just... I want to. I promise."

You hand her the paper in neatly written handwriting.

I, Y/N Y/L/N, fully consent to the use of the Siren Song by Bianca Barcley. I have willingly agreed to be under the influence of the song for as long as I wish. All punishments that are given for using the Siren Song are punishments I will take over. Bianca Barcley is not to be lectured nor punished for her actions.

Underneath it is your handwriting, together with the date of today. Bianca takes a deep breath, nodding as she reads it over and over again.

"What exactly... Is it that you want me to do? You just... Want to forget him?"

You nod.

"I was thinking that... I don't want to be scared of him, I just want to stay out of his way. If that makes any sense?"

"Xavier Thorpe will be the one you forget, from now on his name will stop sounding in your head," Bianca mutters, trying to practice whatever she will say. "Distance is something that you will keep, he will not be the reason as to why you... Weep?"

You will forget Xavier, make sure to keep your distance, and not cry over him. You do feel guilty for making Bianca use the Siren Song on you, but in your eyes, it feels like the only way out.

"I think you will just return to how it was before you met Xavier," she then nods. "I will try to make sure that you will not get too close to him again, but I can't promise anything. If you have feelings for him now, you might just... Start liking him all over again."

"I just need to forget," you say, handing the handwritten note to Bianca. "Thank you so much, Bianca."

"This might be the first time I feel guilty for using it," she laughs nervously. "But, you deserve it. Truly. Xavier just needs to get his act straight. He loves you, he's just dumb."

You don't fully believe her. You want to, but you can't. You truly thought that he liked you back, that he was also interested in you. But now you were not even sure if he liked you as a friend anymore.

"Ready? You will probably be sleepy after this."

Trembling hands and nervous sighs.

"As ready as I'll ever be."

Bianca nods, pulling the necklace off of her neck. She closes her eyes, holding your hands in hers.

"Xavier Thorpe will be the one you forget, from now on his name will stop sounding in your head. Distance is something that you will keep, he will not be the reason as to why you weep."

-

You had woken up with a slight headache. Your limbs are still sore from the Rave'n dance, but that can't stop you. Not that you remember a lot of it; they must have spiked the drinks. You pick up your bag from under the bed, emptying it out before filling it with everything you need for the day. After finally finding all your books, pens, and notebooks, you exit your room.

"Hi, guys!"

With a big smile, you greet your friends, plopping down in between Kent and Bianca. You had gotten a sandwich from the dining hall, trying to get some breakfast in before your first class.

"Good morning, sleepyhead," Kent snickers. "You're up before me most of the time."

You shrug, taking a bite of your sandwich.

"I was so tired," you mumble, wiping your mouth with the napkin. "I'm still sore from all the dancing!"

Ajax and Enid soon also join the table as Enid huffs.

"I feel like the paint is still in my hair," she complains. "I mean, it was a good post for my blog, but that dress was my favorite dress ever! "

You let out a chuckle, closing the sandwich container before placing the leftovers in your bag. Yes, the paint was a pain to get out of your hair and your dress has also been stained, but the rest of the evening went splendidly.

After fifteen minutes, the first bell rings, signaling that classes are to start in only five minutes. You sling your backpack onto your back before standing up from the table.

"You ready for Botany?" Bianca smirks.

"Well," you sigh. "Can I use your notes? I can't find any of mine from the last three weeks. I don't know what I did during class, but I know that there is a test coming up and this is not my best subject."

Bianca's smile falters for a second, realizing that you really don't remember a lot about Xavier anymore.

"Yeah, you can sit with me. Might be the easiest anyway."

You nod, entering the class as you greet miss Thornhill. She had already placed some strange plants in the front of the classroom as other students slowly entered the classroom.

Some students already picked a spot, including Wednesday. She is placed next to another person, hair to his shoulders and a frown on his face.

"Good morning, Wednesday!"

You sit down on the opposite side of Bianca as she and the boy sit between you and Wednesday.

He feels familiar. It is almost like he was in a dream. Like you accidentally bumped into him once or twice, only seeing him in your classroom once in a while. It's like the lingering smell of perfume when someone walks past you, or when you see a half-erased line of pencils on a page. He is mesmerizing, yet extremely intimidating. It is almost like you can't rip your eyes off of him, but you are also too scared to keep looking.

Bianca gives you a look before placing her notebook in front of you, making sure that you can read all of it as Thornhill starts talking. You try to write down all she says, making small sketches of the flowers and plants she shows while also trying to write down all the notes from the last few weeks.

"Alright, so, I will be expecting the essays about the Ghost Orchid and at least two more carnivorous plants. No maximum amount of words, but at least 450 words per plant."

Thank God for Bianca's notes. Without those, you would have actually failed this.

"I think I'm going to be doing my homework in the Nightshade library," you whisper to the girl. "I really need to get started on this."

After writing down the last few sentences, you drop your pen. Your hand is cramping from all the writing and your fingers are covered in ink. Only Biology and one hour of fencing left and after that, you were going to sit with the Choir Club, even though you're not a member. You would often hang out with them, sitting on a bench nearby while waiting for your friends to finish. You yourself were actually in the Art Club, but you tend to hang out with other clubs on days that you didn't have any.

A small break after Botany, just long enough to grab a hot drink from the dining hall before getting dressed in your fencing suit again.

"Bianca? You want to team up?"

She raises an eyebrow, smirking while grabbing a saber, switching it from hand to hand.

"I thought you would never ask."

"I can use some competition. And improvement."

Bianca won. Not once, not twice, but five times. You groan as you end up on the floor again, the tip of the saber pointing to your chest. You hold up your hand before pushing yourself up.

"We get it," you let out a laugh before pulling the mask off of your head. "I'm going to need a break."

She holds out her hand, helping you get up before taking her own mask off. The two of you walk towards one of the small wooden benches that sit against the wall of the room, grabbing a bottle of water before cracking it open, and taking big sips.

Everyone else is still training, the clanking of sabers and the sound of shoes against the mats filling up the classroom. You let out a big sigh, pushing some strands of hair out of your face.

"I don't know if I will ever fight you again," you mumble.

"You're getting better," Bianca laughs, closing the bottle back up. "I have seen worse."

You look at everyone around you, some also taking off their masks to catch their breath as Coach walks around, giving out tips and advice where needed.

The boy with the long hair is here again, yet you still don't know where you know him from. Bianca sneakily looks at you, blinking before looking at Xavier. He acted like you weren't even there as he just fenced against Ajax. She does still think the two of you fit together like two pieces of a puzzle, but Xavier first needs to figure himself out. She knows he likes you; it is clear as day. But as long as he acts like this, he doesn't deserve you. Not at all.

Has he always just been in the background? It is like a ghost, you know that you have seen him, yet you don't know where or when.

"One more round?"

-

"I think I'll be heading to the library now," you tell Bianca. "I genuinely don't know what happened these last few weeks, but I am behind on all my homework."

Half of the Choir Club time has passed as they rehearsed their songs for Outreach Day. They were to perform when the new statue in the town square was going to be revealed. But you had more than enough homework to do.

"I might join you later," she sighs. "Some quiet would be nice."

You tell your friends goodbye before slinging your bag over your shoulder, hurrying down the Quad and into the small hidden hallway leading to the Poe statue. With two snaps you get in, making sure that the entrance is closed off again before going down the stairs.

Nice and quiet.

After around forty-five minutes, you hear some more rumbling. Ah, Bianca must be here. You have gotten a lot of work done, actually. The Ghost Orchid part of your essay is already done, now moving on to the Crimson Pitch plant.

"Hey, Bianca!"

The footsteps descend the stairs, but the figure does not belong to Bianca. The tall guy with long hair walks into the library, the one that felt like he lived somewhere in your memory. Your eyes grow big as you immediately throw everything back in your bag. You didn't know that he was a Nightshade as well.

You close your bag hurriedly. Something about him is so intimidating, but he is absolutely mesmerizing at the same time. Why are you so afraid of him? When walking out you accidentally bump into him.

"Sorry," you quickly mumble, running up the stairs before he can even reply.

Bianca is cleaning up when you get out of the library, so you run up to her. Luckily she is still there.

"Can I do my homework in your room? Yoko was inviting some friends to my dorm and..." You look around, making sure no one is around them. "That guy showed up again. The new one."

Bianca clenches her teeth, grabbing the last few papers before stuffing them in her bag, taking your arm to take you up into her room. She can't have Xavier mess this all up. You haven't been this happy in weeks.

You sit down against her bed, laptop on your lap as you are typing away. But the words are getting stuck, the same sentence being rewritten multiple times before finally getting one that slightly makes sense.

"Is he new?"

Bianca turns around on her chair, looking at you.

"Who?"

"The guy with long hair. He was in the Nightshade library. I- I didn't know if he was supposed to be in there because I wasn't sure if he was in our group."

Why does he have to be there at the exact same time as you? It almost makes the Siren Song useless. You might avoid him as much as you can, but he isn't under the spell.

"He's new."

"He's kinda pretty."

Bianca scoffs.

"Pretty weird. It might be best to stay out of his way, he needs to work on himself before making new... friends."

-

Xavier groans, dropping his bag on the floor. You had been fully ignoring him, but to be fair, he totally deserved it. He had noticed you sneaking into the library and his plan was to try and talk to you, but you had fled before he could get one word in.

He had called Ajax, asking him to come down to the library as soon as he could. Xavier spent some time sitting in the room, biting on his lips while bouncing his leg up and down. He really, really fucked up.

Rumbling of stones and footsteps.

Ajax shows up, slightly out of breath. He had ran here from his dorm. Xavier said that there was a big problem and if he was needed in the Nightshade library, it would probably be huge.

"What's up, man?"

"I fucked up," Xavier runs his hands over his face. "Like, really bad."

The Gorgon frowns, looking at his friend. Xavier looks stressed out, more than usual. His hair is messy, his eyes are red and he has big eyebags underneath his eyes.

"What did you do?"

The artist breathes in shakily, pacing around the room while fiddling with his hands.

"I have been a total asshole to Y/N," he mumbles. "I left her at the Rave'n, drenched in that paint, and then she went up to visit me. I wasn't only a horrible date, but I was an even worse friend."

"Xavier?" Ajax asks yet again. "What did you do?"

Xavier breathes out roughly, blinking while pursing his lips. He is too ashamed to say it, but he needs to tell someone. He needs someone to set him straight.

"I treated her like shit. I told her Wednesday was better than she is."

His friend gasps, looking at his friend almost disgusted. How could he have said that to her? After all those nights of the artist hanging out in Ajax's dorm, him smoking some weed while listening to his friend blabber on about how much he liked you, and then he does this?

"What the fuck? Xavier, you have liked her for years, why would you say that?!"

Xavier rubs his eyes. If anyone is disappointed, it's him. He was so in his head that he took it all out on you. Wednesday isn't better than you. He has liked you for the longest time now, and this just messed it all up. Xavier his mental health has been declining, especially now that he is also suspected of being some type of monster. But that isn't your fault. None of it is. You have always, always been there for him, and he just swept you to the side.

"I'm going to be honest, dude," Ajax looks at his friend. "I am really disappointed in you."

"As you should be," Xavier whispers.

"I'll help."

Xavier looks up, kind of shocked. For some reason, he expected Ajax to just abandon Xavier in the library, leaving him to fend for himself.

"Only if you promise to never do this again. Go to Kinbott more, try and talk about your feelings. Y/N never cared, you could show up crying at her dorm at three am and she would make sure that you're fine before she even thinks of going to sleep."

"Ajax- Thank you so much."

"Yeah, yeah. Just try to talk to her. I'm serious, Xavier. You might be my best friend, but this is not cool."

-

For the last two weeks, Xavier had tried to talk to you on multiple occasions. He even sat at your table, though Kent and Bianca were hovering around you, not even letting Xavier get one word in.

During Botany he tried to draw a butterfly, making it float in the air before it quickly gets swatted away by Bianca who just gives Xavier a disgusted stare.

During Fencing he walked up to you, wanting to ask you to train with him like you usually did, but you quickly darted away once you saw him coming for you.

He went down to the Nightshade library to wait for you, yet you never came.

What he did do was 'accidentally' bump into you. He would calculate when he had to stand up to go to class. The first thing you would put in your bag was your notebook, followed by your pencil case. After that you would close the zipper; his sign to stand up. After swinging the bag on your shoulder, you would walk off.

You accidentally bump into someone's back, making the bottle of water that they had in their hand fall.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!"

As you go to pick it up and give it back, you see the boy again. The boy that appeared in your dreams as if they were faint memories. The boy reminded you of ink splatters and the smell of freshly painted walls.

You quickly hand him the bottle, excusing yourself before finding your way to a picnic table again. He makes you nervous, and you don't know in what way. Bianca warned you for him, so all you could do was listen.

In your room, you had a collection of handwritten notes, asking you to meet up in the Nightshade library. You never did. Once you showed them to Bianca, she immediately shook her head.

-

"I don't know what else to do," Xavier furrows his eyebrows, "She just doesn't want to talk to me. I don't blame her for not wanting to, but sometimes she even completely ignores me. As if she doesn't even know my name. I tried everything."

Ajax takes a hit of his joint, his eyes tinted red before he blows it out of the window. The moon is lighting up Nevermore, its stars shining around it.

"Everything?"

"Yeah," Xavier responds. "I tried to talk to her, give her notes, even accidentally bumped into her. But, Bianca and Kent are just acting like bodyguards to her."

"If you want, I can try to talk to her tomorrow."

"You would do that?"

"Yeah," the Gorgon shrugs. "She still talks to me sometimes. Hanging out in the Quad after classes. I'll let you know how it went."

-

"Y/N! Hey!"

Ajax runs up to you, a big smile on his face before he pulls his beanie back down.

"Ajax! It is nice to see you again."

"What are your plans for today?"

Hm, what were your plans? You did really want to go to the Weathervane to get a drink, but considering it is a Thursday, you weren't too sure. There are no shuttle buses today, and walking in the chilly weather for twenty-five minutes didn't sound too appealing.

"I have some homework I still need to do. I was thinking of going to the Nightshade library to study. Want to join?"

The boy eagerly shakes his head, following you through the hall and down the stairs. The small table gets filled with books, pens, and notebooks. Ajax didn't really take a lot of homework, but he did provide some snacks.

The two of you talked about all different types of things. How he was planning on asking out Enid, how you expected Outreach Day to go, which homework you were doing, and much more.

"Can I maybe ask you something personal?"

You hum, looking up from your paper.

"Of course."

"I was just wondering," he awkwardly laughs. "What happened at the Rave'n?"

"I have no idea," you shrug. "I think there were some Normies who set off the sprinklers. All I know is that my dress is still stained and that, whatever it was, really burned my eyes."

Ajax frowns, what are you talking about?

"Yeah, no, I was there. One beanie destroyed," he chuckles. "But I meant more like... After the Rave'n. What happened?"

It is your turn to be confused.

"Well... I showered, tried to wash the stains out of my clothes, and then hung out with Bianca."

Do you just really not remember?

"What? No, Y/N, I mean... What happened with you and Xavier?"

Even more confusion spreads on your face as you put your pen down on the paper. What is he talking about? All you did was dance, drink punch, took a break, danced more, and then went to clean yourself from the sticky red paint. And who is he talking about?

"Who is Xavier?"

------------------------

TAGLIST

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[antianakin]

I find it very interesting to look at how different it feels when Padme and Luke both say "There's still good in him" just based on the context and lead-up to that line for both characters and why audiences might view the characters differently because of it despite the intentional parallel.

Let's start with Padme. Yes, Padme's dying words are intended to parallel her son's line from Return of the Jedi and we know that she ultimately ends up "right" about there still being good in Anakin. But the context of Padme saying this gives a very different tone to that scene.

Because Padme is a character who actively tries to pretend that Anakin has no darkness in him at all despite repeated evidence being shown and told to her that he DOES simply because it's more convenient for her to do so.

In Attack of the Clones, Anakin straight up tells her he believes in dictatorship and Padme's response isn't to be disgusted or report him, but to just decide that he must have been making fun of her because it's a lot easier than dealing with the reality that the guy who is supposed to be taking care of her is in fact a fascist. And then just a few days after that, Anakin screams in Padme's face that he just massacred an entire village of people down to the last child because he sees them as animals and her response is to decide that this is just a totally normal response to trauma rather than, again, being disgusted by it and reporting him. And of course that movie ends with her deciding to marry him, despite knowing he's a murderer and a fascist and that this is against the rules for BOTH of them.

In Revenge of the Sith, there's an entire scene where Padme and Anakin sit there joking at each other about how love blinds you. They're joking around and you can see the scene as just a sweet little nonsense scene if you choose to, but it's also very intentionally foreshadowing a lot and has the subtext of the thing that is going to destroy both of them in a few days. When Obi-Wan comes to Padme to ask her about where Anakin is and tells her about what Anakin's done, Padme's response is to deny it. She argues that Anakin would never kill children, despite the fact that she knows he HAS killed children before. And then she lies to Obi-Wan, obstructing his ability to figure out the truth about what happened to his people or to gain justice for the genocide that was just committed against them. And her next response is to go find Anakin so that she can ensure he escapes any consequences for what he's done while still insisting that he hasn't done anything wrong at all.

So when Padme says "There's still good in him" it comes with the context of Padme spending two entire films refusing to actually see Anakin for who he actually is. It comes after MULTIPLE scenes of Padme rejecting the reality that Anakin has darkness in him that he is fully capable of acting on. Sure, she's not wrong that there's still good in him, but the line feels more like Padme just continuing to pretend that Anakin didn't just commit a genocide and bring down the Republic rather than Padme being right about Anakin. It doesn't sound like "Yes, I know that he's done a million terrible things, but I have hope that he can still make the right choice if we approach him the right way" and more like "He was probably just brainwashed or something, he didn't REALLY mean to genocide an entire people."

And this then directly foils Luke later on.

Because when LUKE says it, it comes with the context of the entire character journey Luke has been going through over the last 2.5 films. Luke's had to learn to accept his OWN darkness and face his own worst fears about his heritage and what he could become. He's had to face the reality of losing the people he cares about and seen the consequences of what happens when he lets arrogance and fear blind him. Luke has had to accept that Darth Vader is a part of who he is, he's not infallible, he could fall to darkness just like his father did if he isn't careful. But this comes with the ability to recognize that this could mean that Darth Vader might yet be able to turn around and make the opposite choice. If Luke has the ability to fall, Darth Vader has the ability to rise. Luke knows that it's always about making the right choice, and while Darth Vader has made a LOT of bad choices, it doesn't mean he can never make the right one. Choosing to believe that Darth Vader could still have goodness in him is a result of accepting that Luke has darkness in himself, too.

So when Luke says that there's still good in him, there's no attempt to pretend that Anakin hasn't done monstrous things. Luke really can't pretend that Anakin didn't do them, he's literally stood there and watched as Anakin did some of them. He's down a hand for the rest of his life because of Anakin, he'll have to live with the evidence of what Anakin is capable of forever. He CAN'T sit there and pretend that Anakin didn't do those things the way Padme could, it isn't possible for him. For Padme, Anakin will always be "that little boy from Tatooine," just like she says in Attack of the Clones. But Luke knew Darth Vader first, he's known the villain and the monster longer than he'll ever know Anakin Skywalker. Even when he figures out how to reconcile that these two people are the SAME person, he doesn't know enough about Anakin Skywalker to be able to pretend that Darth Vader didn't do the things he's done. Luke says that there is still good in him with the full awareness that Darth Vader has made a LOT of horrific choices in his life. There's never any attempt to try to convince himself or anyone else that that isn't true.

He sees Anakin in the full truth of who and what he is. He knows EXACTLY what kind of darkness Anakin has in him and is choosing to believe he can still make a better choice ANYWAY. Unlike his mother, Luke knows who Anakin is, he's never been given another choice.

That's why Padme comes off as wrong about Anakin while Luke is right even though they both say the same thing. The line doesn't MEAN the same thing to both of them and the audience can pick up on that because both of them have had several films' worth of context letting us know that.

[daenerysies]

It absolutely gets me that the whole thing about Rhaneyra putting her siblings to the sword was made up by Otto, Rhaenyra did nothing to indicate that she would; Alicent just fixated on it like- how do they forget that they literally pulled that crock of shit out of thin air? 😭

it gets me too, especially show-wise. the only time rhaenyra shows any bit of fire against her siblings is during the driftmark incident, where it is blatantly obvious to anyone with a brain that she was bluffing when asking for aemond to be sharply questioned. granted, should she have done it? no. is she also a mother trying her best to protect her kids? and not being a super uber-perfect person in the process? yes to both. this is yet another change from the book i don't like, considering alicent demands luke's eye in retribution first, and rhaenyra retaliates against that rather than starting it.

i'm also adding some significant points that make no sense in the greater context if alicent truly thought her children's lives were endangered; which is how she actively antagonizes rhaenyra. in both medias. she raises her children to hate rhaenyra, to view their nephews as inferior and subhuman to them due to their blood, she instills fear for their lives as a part of their everyday activities, she tells her children that aegon will be king no matter what (which is treason, so she doesn't seem to care that badly about her children being found out as participants of those efforts). she does not act like someone who believes her children are going to be murdered once rhaenyra ascends the throne. it's why i can't take her stans seriously. none of her actions make sense in the grand scheme of things. she purposefully makes an enemy that is (TO HER) capable of cold-blooded murder. what terrified mother would do that?

there's also this fetish for infantilizing and victimizing alicent and co. otto manipulated her when she was a teen, which is a fair take. otto was also ostracized from court for TEN years. ten years with minimal to no contact with alicent. she is no longer a child during that time, she is a grown woman with four children to raise and a perfectly good brain to use. we're not shown or told once that rhaenyra *ever* showed an ounce of violence towards her siblings, and at most, she was indifferent to them. it is stated, however, that during that time skip alicent bullied and harassed rhaenyra, to the point where she abandoned the capital to have peace of mind and safety for her own children. still not the actions of a terrified mother (she also wasn't manipulated into doing any of that; it was all of her own accord because she hated that rhaenyra was afforded more freedom and leeway than she was).

what's more, there is minimal, if any, precedent that rhaenyra would be forced to kill her siblings to secure the throne. viserys was only the fifth targaryen king, not exactly enough time to really establish any killing family as a basis. maegor is the only one to have done so, and he's reviled for it even up to the current timeline. it is even thought that his death was the consequence of kinslaying. it's not normal. there has technically been some sort of succession crisis for almost all the rulers up to this time: aegon the uncrowned and maegor, rhaena and jaehaerys, baelon and rhaenys, viserys and rhaenys/laenor. there are, once again, many ways for aegon, aemond, and daeron to renounce their claim to the throne (night's watch, kingsguard, maester); but that would take away the power alicent and otto wanted to have, so not an option.

i wouldn't even consider daemon that much of a threat if rhaenyra had ascended peacefully. they've changed his character significantly in the show, but daemon explicitly states in fire and blood that they need to find a peaceful way to end this dispute, and not resort to fighting dragons versus dragons (a line they gave to rhaenys in the show) because it would only end in disaster. he doesn't resort to any brutality until after the first blood is drawn by the green's.

basically, it's just another ploy, a 'red herring' if you will, to distract from the true reason why rhaenyra was usurped (and hook, line, sinker; it's working fantastically for some in the fandom).

[inquebrar]

Leo and Sunny's "disagreements" are something totally different that has never happened in this way between any of the eggs before, it's a completely new situation and could lead to some character developments in new arcs from now on. but from my point of view, this situation is quite real and unfortunate. i love Leo so much, the dialogue she had about being genderfluid with qFoolish on the first day of school is one of my favorite moments and even though i don't know Sunny very well i still like her a lot and i don't think they deserve to be treated the way they are being treated. it's unfair, and the point is that yes, Leo has every right to dislike another child and shouldn't be forced to be friends with anyone, that's part of life but that doesn't mean she can treat the other child badly. and here's the thing, Leo is also a child but she's almost a year old while Sunny is only two months old if i'm not mistaken, and this is when the way a child is raised comes in and shapes their personality and how they act.

Leo's parents have always spoiled her a lot and that's a fact, qFoolish loves his child a lot and even though he often scolds Leo when she's being very stubborn, it was never something that was really talked about with the intention of changing, everyone just accepted "Leo is like that" and only now is becoming clear how harmful this behavior can be to the other kids that Leo interacts with, she needs to know that it's not okay for him to act as he wants because "that's how she is, so it's okay" "that's her personality" it was like i said, he may still not like Sunny and choose to never be friends with them, that's ok! but she does not have the right to act how she wants based on how she feels, because through actions you affect the other person and there is consequences. and Sunny isn't even invading Leo's personal space or being mean, and when you realize the key to everything: the parents, everything becomes easier to understand why it's happening because i repeat, both Sunny and Leo are kids.

qTubbo recently ended up involving Sunny in his plan to make qFit and qPac break up, which directly affects qRamon (who is also just a child) and with that, it affected the beautiful siblings relationship that Sunny had with him. qTubbo and qFoolish are the only parents present (at the moment) who takes care of Sunny and Leo respectively, they are the adults so they have the responsibility of dealing with things that affect the children which makes everything more complicated when you remember that there's not a single person on that island that is mentally stable to be a parent... but still, this whole situation can lead to great character development, we can see how qFoolish will deal with noticing that Leo's actions are no longer just "being stubborn" and "acting selfishly for silly things" and qTubbo realizing that what he does affects Sunny too and she needs a lot of support instead of isolation. these are conflicts that drive a story and it's okay to disagree with characters' actions, it's part of following something that's entertaining, it's only interesting to analyze things when they are complex to understand and when there are different points of view.

that being said i want happy endings stop the angst it's enough already! /lh

[thishazbinamistake]

In my opinion, Loona is a character with some of the most wasted potential in Helluva Boss.

Though we don't have a ton of information about her background, we do know she lived in a shelter for much (or maybe even all) of her childhood. Loona is cold and distant to her adoptive father, and outright rude to many others, particularly Moxxie, who she constantly mocks and belittles. I'm thinking that this behavior is either a result of her upbringing, or perhaps it was even the reason she was put into the shelter to begin with. But until more is revealed about her past, I want to complain about the way she's currently written.

Loona is abusive, plain and simple. The way she treats Blitz, her adoptive father, goes way past simple angsty teenage rebellion and well into the abuse territory. Any semblance of Loona being remotely sympathetic was thrown out the window in Seeing Stars, when she kicks Blitz in the groin, all because he was relieved to see her and wanted to give her a hug. And all of that after she gives Octavia the "cut your dad some slack" speech.

I've seen people try and defend this behavior by pointing out that Loona has childhood trauma, and this is why she has these behavioral issues. It's certainly not unheard of for victims of childhood abuse/neglect to have anger issues and poor emotional regulation, and I would have absolutely no problem with this being the case if it was shown to actually be a problem, but it isn't. Not once does Loona get called out for her behavior or face any sort of consequence for treating others poorly. If anything, this abusive behavior is treated as a joke more often than not.

It's extremely ironic that one of the most despised characters in Helluva Boss, Stella, receives so much hate for being abusive towards Stolas, when we've seen Loona do far worse to Blitz. I honestly cannot think of a logical reason as to why we're supposed to like Loona, while also hating Stella. We see Stella nearly hit Stolas and it's (rightfully) treated as being abusive. But when Loona is constantly beating up her dad for no good reason, we're just supposed to laugh? It seems extremely hypocritical on both the writers' part, as well as many of the fans'. I honestly can't tell if the writers genuinely think this behavior is okay (when it's coming from Loona) or if they just see it as a quirky character trait of hers.

If we're supposed to find Loona likeable, which we clearly are, then the writers seriously need to start making some changes. I'm not saying they should just completely retcon Loona's character and suddenly make her nice, but they do need to start being consistant with how they portray abuse, and they seriously need to stop excusing and coddling her horrible behavior, regardless of if she has childhood trauma. That is not how you grow as a person and overcome your issues. Yes, it's a process that is often long and difficult, but it hasn't been shown that Loona is actually trying to make any change at all, or that anyone is actually encouraging her to change.

If you want an actually halfway decent example of a character overcoming their trauma (at least within the Hellaverse) look no further than Blitz himself. It's clear his father was abusive and explotative towards him, not to mention he accidentally caused the death of his mother and the maiming of his close friend. Both of these things likely contributed to many of Blitz's flaws and issues as an adult. But the thing is, despite all that, Blitz himself isn't abusive to his daughter. He has shown nothing but unconditional love and devotion to his daughter despite his past. I'm not saying Blitz is a perfect character by any means (I won't excuse him literally threatening to rape his employees), but it really goes to show this whole argument of 'Loona acts the way she does because she has childhood trauma and that makes it okay' doesn't hold up to scrutiny as much as her stans seem to think.

I think a good idea would be to start showing more of how Loona's behavior negatively affects those around her, something which would give her the motivation to want to change. Show how hurt Blitz feels whenever Loona lashes out at him. We get a taste of this in Spring Broken when she hurts Blitz's feelings, but it's clear from both her dialogue in the scene as well as her later actions that the writers apparently don't want her to actually learn from her mistakes and grow as a character, which is such a shame.

Loona had the opportunity to be an extremely complex and compelling character if her aggression and violent outbursts were actually addressed as being a problem she needed to overcome, and if she actually tried changing herself for the better. Seeing the effort she puts into treating others better and breaking the cycle of abuse would have made her character feel so much stronger and more likeable. But instead, the show just treats this abusive behavior as a quirky, edgy joke and "lol that's just classic Loona!! What can ya do lol!!!"

She does have her moments where a good character actually shines through, but they're so few and far in between. I want to like Loona so much, but as it currently stands, I just can't, and that makes me sad.

[wisteria-winter]

Greetings all!

Just want to start by informing that I am AroAce, on the repulsed side of things with no drive at all, and I'd think that Alastor is quite the same (or I guess that is more my head cannon of things). So, I'm quite curious if there are any fanfics that explores that?

Or more specifically, if there are any that really go into how uncomfortable he'd be when it comes to things regarding romance and intimacy. Like, is there any writing in which Alastor is asked to hold hands and all he wants to do in response is to stab his hand with a pair of scissors? Or one in which he's offered a kiss and just wants to peel the top layer of his tongue of?

We all haven't forgotten he's a murderer, right?

So, wouldn't it be interesting if his visceral reactions were quite gruesome? He might not act on them, for he is a gentleman after all, but that doesn't change fact that they exist.

Just imagen, one thinks of flowers and sunsets, while the other thinks of blood and broken bones. I think it would be a really fun read.

Like ideas for things that could happen are endless! Just imagen someone asking for his hand and that's all he gives them. He just cuts of his hand and hands it over to them.

"Here you go my dear, though I can hardly see what use you'd have for it."

Which I feel could be a part of why he likes cannibal town. For if they ask for his hand and he gives it, they actually appreciate the gesture. All others just seem to throw it to the side in horror. He does find joy in that reaction too, but it's nice when people actually mean what they say.

____

There is also the idea that Rosie might have, in the beginning, tried to gauge if he had any interest in her. Just a way to figure out his possible motives. Which would then be the reason for how she can be so sure that he's (Aro)Ace.

One fun thing might also be that she sees his tail and comments on how adorable it is, and him being him, just rips it off.

"Well, that makes one of us." He says giving it to her. "So, you can have it my dear."

The best part would then be that she'd invite him for dinner and have it as a centrepiece, making a great meal with the theme of adorable.

"Isn’t this adorable?" She'd ask with a smile.

"You've quite outdone yourself, my dear Rosie." He'd say with a sigh, putting his cutlery down. "Yes, it's very adorable." To which she would be quite delighted, and he'd just smile at her reaction, she's a good friend.

____

And if he does have a drive, what if he dislikes it?

Like in his mind he has rules that should be followed and if his body decides to break those rules, then there will be consequences. One might be to bite the arm, creating a sensation that is far more prominent, a distraction of sort.

Then if the arm 'accidentally' comes of, the only logical choice is to use it for dinner. (Though it could also be eaten as is, I'd guess)

____

All this to ask, Does anyone know a story of that sort?

Honestly, it doesn't even have to be from Hazbin.

If there exists a repulsed AroAce character whose response to any advances are thoughts of the gruesome kind, then I’d be really delighted to read that ᵔᵜᵔ

I just feel that it falls very nicely into Alastor’s character to have that sort of response, (while still remaining composed, of course).

[virtualvault]

What Good Girls Get

Pairing: Switch! Marc Spector x Sub!reader x Dom!Layla El-Faouly

Summary: While Layla is away, Marc wants to play. Being the good girl you are, you reject his advances and she rewards you while Marc is left to face the consequences.

Warnings: Dom/ Sub dynamics, polyamory, punishment, brat!marc, dirty talk, praise kink, degradation, rough sex, sex toys, strap-ons, squirting, oral(f) receiving, oral(m) receiving, pet names, fingering, begging, spitting, slapping, aftercare, cuddles(Let me know if I missed anything:))

Word Count: 4.5k

A/N: This is only my second fic so I'm still working on getting better at exposition and stuff but I'm actually really proud of the smut and dialogue in this one. As always, feedback is welcome and encouraged. Enjoy!!

"We shouldn't. Layla told us we can't fool around while she's gone." you whine as you lay on the bed, Marc hovering above you. His face is buried in your neck while he plants sloppy kisses across your skin. You do your best to stand your ground but make no move to try and get him off you.

"Marc, I'm serious. Did you see the look in her eyes? She really meant it. I don't know about you, but I don't want to get on her bad side. We just got off punishment for the kitchen incident." It was quite a punishment too, but to be honest you deserved it. A few days ago, Layla had gone out to get dinner while Marc graciously offered to stay behind and help you finish preparing the dessert you were making for your friend's birthday. His help soon turned into a distraction as he started grabbing at you and pulling you against him, despite your determination to focus on the task at hand.

It started with Marc innocently feeding you a few of the strawberries you were cutting up and by the time Layla returned he had you on your knees, his dick covered in whipped cream, and you eagerly cleaning it off with your tongue. She had forbidden you two to touch yourselves or one another for the rest of the week as punishment and didn't let either of you out of her sight. She knew that would lead to more trouble.

That's why when she had been called to attend an event that would require her to stay across town overnight, she was hesitant. If it were just you, she wouldn't have worried. You're always on your best behavior. Unless Marc is there. He's always the instigator. You can count on one hand all the times you've been punished for something that didn't involve Marc. You craved Layla's approval, needed her to be proud of you. Marc made that incredibly difficult, though. Despite your better judgement, you almost always gave in. He had this hold over you that made him impossible to resist. Especially when Layla isn't there and you miss her.

Marc misses her desperately when she's gone as well, and that's part of the reason he acts out. It also doesn’t help that he is a brat through and through. For him, all the rules fly out the window the moment she steps out the door. He loves to rile her up. Lately he's been pushing his luck and punishments have been getting increasingly severe. Instead of turning soft at the end like Layla has a habit of doing, especially when it comes to you, she's started implementing 'no touching rules', ruined orgasms, edging with no release, withholding pleasure, etc. He also just can't help himself when he gets you all alone. It's like a switch flips in his brain and he just wants to pounce on you. Make you misbehave like he does. He knows you're Layla's good girl and he loves to see you turn into a dirty little slut for him.

"C'mon, it's not like she just ran out to the store, she won't be home until tomorrow. There's no way she'll find out." He continues to kiss down your neck and palms at your chest, making you arch your back.

"Yes, she will. I don't know how she does it, but she can always tell."

"That's because you can't lie to save your life, baby. You know, you really need to work on your poker face." he jests, and you shoot him a glare. But you can't help the small smile that forms on your face because you know he's right. If you're ever hiding something, you distance yourself from Layla, unable to even look her in the eyes. When she finally makes you, whatever you're hiding comes spilling out of you, completely out of your control. And if it had something to do with Marc, which is usually the case, he gets in trouble as well. It's detrimental to you both.

" You really don't want to?" Marc asks. He gives you puppy dog eyes, pulling out all the stops to try and get you to give in.

"Of course, I do." You play with the hem of his shirt, trying to ignore the way you feel his bulge against your thigh.

"I just really don't want to disobey her. We don't have to wait too long; she'll be back tomorrow. And who knows, maybe she'll even reward us for being good. It's been a while." You offer, trying to convince not only him but yourself to resist the temptation.

"It's been a while for me. She rewards you all the time. It's not fair." He pouts and pinches your sides, making you giggle.

"That's because you actually have to behave for that to happen, dummy. You just have to learn to follow the rules. And tonight is the perfect opportunity to try it out." you stroke his hair reassuringly. It would do him some good to practice some restraint.

"I'll try." he says, with absolutely zero sincerity in his voice.

"How about we go watch a movie instead? She never said we couldn't cuddle." He nods, smiling at you innocently enough to convince you he has given up. You cup his face and pull it to yours, and you plant a soft kiss on the tip of his nose. He stands, helps you up, and you both head to the living room.

Marc manages to keep his hands to himself through most of the film. He has you held against him, fitting snuggly in his side. You rest your head on his shoulder, enjoying the safe and warm feeling he provides. You even start to doze off, but awaken when Marc shifts, telling you he's heading to the bathroom. In his absence, you lay your head down on the cushion. Rolling over on your stomach, you feel yourself succumb to the drowsiness again. A few minutes later, you are startled awake when you feel the couch dip, and a weight settle on your backside. You curiously turn your head to find Marc straddled across your thighs. You try to wriggle away, but he puts his full weight on your back and effectively stops you. He starts kissing and licking down the back of your neck.

“Marc, you were doing so well. Let’s just go to bed.” you plead.

“I'd love to take you to bed.” he responds, then starts softly nipping at your skin.

“That’s not what I meant, and you know it.” You feel him grin against you and it sends tingles across your skin.

“C'mon it’s not like I'm going to tell. And you’ll have until tomorrow evening to get yourself together enough to face Layla. You can keep one little secret, can’t you?” You are already putty in his hands and let wanton moans fall from your lips at the warmth of his mouth on your skin and his hands grabbing at your sides.

“I want to so bad. I just… I wanna be a good girl.” you whine.

"Well, it's nice to know one of you respects me.” Layla chimes in, and you both jump, startled by her surprise entrance. Neither of you had heard her come in. You freeze, and so does the man above you. A feeling of dread falls over you but is overtaken by a feeling of delight when your eyes land on your beautiful girlfriend. She’s still wearing the outfit she wore to the event, and she looks breathtaking.

"I managed to find a way to come home early to the loves of my life and this is what I find. Did I not make myself clear before I left?" She scolds, but there is a slight playfulness to her tone.

Marc, still refusing to look at her, lifts himself into a sitting position. You glance back at him and see the look of contemplation on his face. He could play this one of two ways. He could apologize profusely and get on his hands and knees begging for forgiveness, or he could stand his ground and see how far he can push his luck. Being the brat he is, he obviously chooses the latter. Not even bothering to answer her, he flips you over and Layla rounds the coffee table to stand in front of you both. He moves his eyes to hers as he starts grabbing at you and sliding your shirt up, exposing your breasts. Layla’s silence is deadly, yet the look on her face is eerily calm.

He grabs your bare chest and starts tweaking your nipples, and you whimper at the sensation. You don’t want to upset her, but it just feels so good. You rub your thighs together trying to relieve some of the pressure building in your core.

Neither of your partners notice as both sets of eyes are locked in a stare, waiting to see what the other will do next. The mischievous grin on Marc's face makes you nervous. You know he’s playing with fire and isn’t considering the consequences. But as always, his behavior manages to stoke the flames in the pit of your stomach. You don’t know what it is, the thought of testing Layla's patience yourself never crosses your mind. But seeing her reaction when Marc does it makes you want him to keep going, even though you know he’ll pay for it later.

You grab Marc’s wrists, not even sure if it’s to stop him or urge him on and you shoot Layla a pleading look, silently begging her to do something. Marc finally looks away as he brings his mouth down to one of your breasts. He latches onto your nipple and rolls it between his teeth. You let out a squeal and squeeze your eyes shut.

“Do you want him to stop?” You don’t even hear what Layla says as Marc's other hand travels down your stomach and lands on your clothed mound.

“Look at me, angel. I asked you a question. Do you want Marc to stop?” Trying to steady your voice as his fingers slip into your underwear, dragging up and down your wet folds, you whimper, “It feels good but…but I don’t want to disobey you.” She gives you a soft smile and wears a proud look on her face, causing a warmth to bloom in your chest. She walks towards you and bends down so her face is level with yours.

As she starts petting your hair she coos, “Of course you don’t. Because you’re my good girl, aren’t you?” you preen at her words. No matter how good Marc’s touch makes you feel, nothing compares to Layla's praise. With a newfound strength and determination to prove her right, you push Marc’s hand out of your pants and shove his face away. He watches you cover your chest, making it impossible for him to continue, and he huffs.

He sits up and contemplates his next move. He was really banking on you giving in and being able to test your girlfriend's patience together. Even when he's facing punishment himself, he loves seeing you endure one too. Seeing Layla's little angel get in trouble turns him on in a way he can’t describe. But it looks like you had more willpower than he thought, and he’ll be taking this one on his own.

As a last-ditch effort, he blurts out “She started it.” You gasp, knowing that’s a bold-faced lie.

He continues, “She was on me the moment you walked out the door. But you know how irresistible she is when she begs, I couldn’t help it. I’m just doing what you would’ve done.” He leers back at her, trying to stand firm. Layla sighs, not believing him for a second. She's getting frustrated. As much as she hates it when you two break the rules, she hates when you lie about it even more. She usually lets you off easier if you come forward and tell her what really happened. You always do but Marc has the habit of dodging the truth until she drags it out of him. It’s a nasty habit that she’s determined to break, and now is the perfect opportunity.

“He’s lying! He was trying to fuck me all night! I told him you’d be mad, but he wouldn’t listen.” You match the glare he shoots you, and he grabs your thigh firmly in warning, not appreciating the outburst. But you weren’t going to roll over on this one. You had worked really hard to finally find the strength to not give in for once and you’d be damned if you went down for this with him. You want your reward for being a good girl and you aren’t going to let him ruin that.

“You believe me don’t you, Lay?” You look up at her through your lashes and give her the sweetest look you can muster up. The nickname brings a smile to her face, and she replies, “Of course I do, baby.”

“But” Marc starts, and Layla raises her brow at him, daring him to keep testing her patience. He backs down immediately, hanging his head in defeat.

“Go lay on the bed sweetheart.” She instructs and leans down, connecting her mouth with yours. Marc, enjoying the show, subconsciously starts stroking your thigh but she is quick to swat his hand away. “You, go stand at the foot of the bed. And keep your hands to yourself.” she commands, and he follows you into the bedroom, dragging his feet.

He stands in front of you now, arms crossed in annoyance, and you smirk at him. “Thanks a lot.” he sneers.

“Hey, I said to be patient and we’d get rewarded. Maybe this will teach you a lesson.” you say smugly, and he rolls his eyes.

Layla enters, grabbing the chair from the desk and placing it in front of the bed. She makes Marc strip. She then ties up his hands and orders him to sit but leaves him unrestrained otherwise. She removes her jacket and proceeds to strip you, softly caressing your sides as she does, and your skin heats up under her touch. Shifting you, she lays you at the end of the bed, parallel to the headboard, and gives Marc a full view of her body and yours. Normally he'd be thankful but under these circumstances it's torturous.

She makes her way down your body, nipping and sucking at your skin. She's always thorough, taking the time to admire every inch of you. After leaving your stomach and thighs covered in love bites, and running her tongue over your marked skin, she buries her head between your thighs. She's gentle and diligent but she doesn't rush. Doesn't eat you out in a frenzy like Marc tends to do. She knows your body better than you do and knows just what to do to have you fall apart on her tongue.

She has to hold your waist down as you writhe on the bed. Your sultry moans and desperate cries have Marc involuntarily bucking his hips into the air, begging for relief. Before you know it, she has you cumming hard and you grind your hips against her mouth as she sucks on your clit, helping you ride the waves of pleasure. Giving you a second to catch your breath, she then positions you on the edge of the bed, exposing you to Marc, and takes her place behind you. She wraps her legs around yours and uses them to spread your thighs. Her movements begin slow, like before, and she starts by gently circle your clit with her fingers. The torturous speed has you crying out for more. Wanting to give you whatever your heart desires, she dips her fingers into you. They slip in easily, and each delicious drag of her digits against your walls has you bucking your hips against her hand.

Your arousal starts to form a ring around her fingers and drips onto the floor. The sight has Marc falling to his knees in front of you, face nearing your center. Layla gives him a warning look, but she can feel you getting close, so she doesn’t want to stop. Then she gets an idea. She pushes faster against that sweet spot inside you and matches that rhythm as she starts rubbing your swollen bud. Mesmerized by the sight, Marc leans his head against your thigh.

“No touching.” Layla commands and he nods. He doesn’t move any closer, practicing more restraint than he ever has in his life. She starts nipping at that spot under your ear and it has you squirming. You feel that familiar pressure building that you didn’t feel with your previous climax and smile, realizing what’s about to happen, and your whole body tenses. “I'm cumming” is all you can say before you start spasming and you explode all over his face. Marc flinches slightly at the unexpected splash of your arousal. It just keeps streaming out of you and he quickly opens his mouth wide, groaning as your sweet nectar coats his tongue. He gives Layla a pleading look, and she knows what he wants.

“You can clean off her thighs.” she says, loving the hungry look on his face. He laps at your drenched thighs and savors the taste that he's been dying for all night. You let out a satisfied purr and you eyes fall closed, feeling soothed by the warmth of his tongue. When he's finished, he takes a moment and just stares at your sex. Before he can stop himself, he lurches forward to indulge in your arousal from the source. Before he can reach you, though, Layla yanks his head back by his hair, clicking her tongue at him.

“Still don’t want to listen, huh?” She moves from behind you and drags him back to the chair. You already miss her warmth, but your excitement grows as she goes to open the trunk you keep on the corner of the room and pulls out some rope and a harness with the familiar pink silicone attached to the base. Your heart starts beating faster and you bite your lip, thrumming with excitement at what’s coming next. She inches the chair closer to the bed, and Marc is now just inches away. She ties him to the chair now, ignoring his grumbling. With her guidance, you are now on your hands and knees, head halfway off the end of the bed, now face to face with Marc. As Layla puts on the strap-on, you can’t help but smile at the pout on his face. You've never seen him this frustrated before and you would feel bad for him if it didn't turn you on so much.

Your girlfriend situates herself behind you, kissing up your spine, and you pull her up so her mouth meets yours and you moan at the saccharine taste of her. When she breaks the connection, her mouth finds your ear and she whispers, “You’re doing so good for me. My obedient girl.” The comment makes your heart swell. You hum, looking her in the eyes, and whisper “I love you.” She nuzzles her face against yours she affectionately replies, “I love you too, angel."

She sits back onto her haunches and rubs the silicone up and down your folds, each flick against your clit making your breath hitch. As she slides the length in to the hilt, you cry out and she sets a maddeningly slow pace. You're about to beg for more, but she already knows what you want. She slowly pulls out to the tip and then slams back into you, and begins giving you those hard, deep thrusts you crave.

After a while, your arms give out underneath you and you fall onto your chest. The arch of your back gives her a delicious view of your ass and she gives it a quick slap. You whine for more and she continues, landing multiple hits to both your cheeks and thighs and you squeal in delight. When she's done, she grabs firmly onto your hip with one hand and the other comes up to settle on the back of your neck and she pulls you back to meet her thrusts.

With your face now just inches away from Marc, you stick your tongue out, unable to resist the temptation to taunt him. It's a pretty juvenile thing to do, you admit, and can’t help the giggle you let out at the sight of the frustration bubbling up inside him, the aggravation showing clear as day on his face. Before you can pull your tongue back in your mouth, he leans forward and spits fast and hard, some landing in your open mouth, and some on your cheek. You gasp, but your surprise quickly morphs into a pathetic whine, loving the taste of him. You drag your tongue over your lips and the surrounding area, trying to get to the spatter that missed your mouth. A satisfied smirk appears on his face, and he mutters, "filthy fucking slut." You whine at his words, and it has you clenching down onto the silicone filling your cunt.

Layla, however, was not amused. She shoves your face down onto the mattress and leans over you to deliver a harsh slap to Marc's face. He moans at the contact, relieved to finally get some sort of stimulation. Before the sting can even settle over his skin, she delivers another. Then, she removes her weight from you and pulls your head up once more.

“That wasn’t very nice, was it baby?” You don’t respond, honestly wishing he'd do it again.

“Oh, you liked it didn’t you, naughty little thing.” You moan at her teasing and look Marc in the eyes, whining, "I want something in my mouth.”

He jolts forward, wanting to break free and give you what you want. An anticipative look crosses his face, and he hopes Layla will make him part of your reward.

“Oh, I'm sorry baby. Here you go.” Determined to keep Marc out of this, Layla hooks her fingers into your mouth. She chuckles at Marc's reaction as she sees his shoulders slump, clearly disappointed. You immediately wrap your lips around her digits and he zeros in on your movements, imagining it was him in your mouth instead.

Her thrusts become more brutal, each one knocking the thoughts right out of your head. You feel yourself mentally slipping, unable to form even one coherent sentence. All you can do is babble nonsense, hoping she understands how close you are to your release. Layla drags your head up by your hair and you face Marc again, mouth open and drooling down into the sheets. He's seen that look before and he knows you're right on the edge. He looks you right in the eyes and whispers, " Do it, baby. Cum." He's not even sure you heard him, but your eyes immediately roll to the back of your head, and you start shaking. Layla holds you against her, knowing you love the closeness and skin to skin contact when you fall apart. All you can feel is white hot pleasure and you're crying out, mouth open in a silent scream as you gasp for breath. You don't even have time to come down from your climax before Layla starts pounding into you again, hard and fast. She holds you down, making you cum again and again.

When she can tell you've had enough, she stops her movements but stays planted inside you to the hilt, knowing you don’t want to feel empty just yet. She runs her hands all over you, trying to bring you back to her and help steady your breathing. You can't tell how much time has passed but when you're finally conscious of your surroundings again, the first thing you see is Marc's pitiful form in front of you. You want to help him. His angry red tip looks painful, and you actually start to feel bad for him. You somehow muster up the strength to reach an arm out to him and he looks at you lovingly. You were just fucked into oblivion, but you still want to make sure he feels good. It makes him smile and he desperately wants to pull you into his arms.

“Can I touch him, please?” You look over your shoulder and give Layla your best puppy dog eyes, hoping she'll cave like she always does when you look at her like that. She arches her brow at you and asks, “Am I not enough, sweetheart?”

“No! You are!” you reply frantically, immediately regretting your words. You continue, “Just look at him. So pathetic. I think he's learned his lesson.” He's been waiting so long and he’s so frustrated he can feel tears starting to form in his eyes. “Please. I'm so sorry. I'll behave. I promise." he begs.

She sighs, feeling conflicted. She knows she has pushed him hard but he did deserve it. She feels herself turning soft at that needy look in his eyes and concedes. She knows what he really wants. He wants one of you to ride him until he sees stars. This is still a punishment, however, so she decides to give him another form of relief.

Leaning down and kissing the crown on your head, she checks in, making sure you're not too overworked. She really gave it to you hard and wants to make sure you don't overdo it. "Are you sure? You look a little worn out." You're touched by her concern but nod eagerly.

"Go ahead baby. He can have your mouth." The sigh of relief that leaves Marc makes you want to laugh. You turn back to him, and your outstretched hand moves to caress his face. He leans into your touch, and kisses at the palm of your hand. You slide it down off his face and Layla helps you to your knees. He makes the most pitiful noise when you take him into your mouth, finally feeling the relief he's waited hours for. You have him cumming in just a few minutes and he thanks both of you profusely.

You're all exhausted, but that doesn't stop them from loving on you. Layla goes to draw a bath while Marc picks you up off the floor, placing soft kisses all over your face. He carries you to the bathroom, where Layla begins to do the same as Marc places you in the tub. The feeling of their love wraps you like a warm blanket, relaxing your mind as the bath water relaxes your tired muscles. You're half asleep when you all finally pile into bed, cuddling up close to one another. Layla lays you in the middle of them the middle and they wrap their arms around you and each other. Not having the energy tonight, you and Marc will be sure to give her a proper 'welcome home' in the morning.

[sonicasura]

Let's be honest with ourselves that Transformers Earthspark has its issues. It isn't uncommon for the series to have a few messy iterations throughout the years. However those at least have something going for them.

Bayverse is a junk pile yet there's a lot of material you can build off on and some pretty interesting concepts. RiD15 is an awful sequel to Prime but does decently well as a standalone although there are much needed changes to be had. Earthspark... Well, it's just there.

I can be lenient with the plot holes and poor pacing as Nickelodeon is notorious for interfering with any show that isn't SpongeBob to the point of cancellation. The issues truly land on the characters themselves. I'm gonna try to simplify it without devolving into a rant like the previous draft.

Edit: Gonna add some further edits as I wrote this in the middle of the night. Plus my simplified version skipped some key details.

Robby. Somehow they made a human character I actually dislike instead of be neutral about. In the official Transformers wiki, he's labeled as a big brother who cares for his siblings but his actions so far say otherwise. Robby literally ran away in the first episode because they moved then decided to try and hide the Terrans from his parents.

Yet he rarely gets enough consequences for his actions. I think we don't just need less Emberstone saves not just because of plot armor but force actual character growth on him. Like a life changing to one of his siblings as consequences for his actions and strained relationship until he gets his head outta his ass.

Edit: Yes, I know Robby is a teenager but that isn't a decent enough excuse for his behavior. Seen the trope about big brothers who do act closed off or at some points rude but they haven't done shit that put their family in serious danger. No, I didn't try to purposely forget the times he was injured badly.

There honestly needs to be less of those and his consequences be adjusted to it affects someone else badly. *

Next issue is lacking confrontation with Optimus choices alongside the obvious misplaced trust in the 13 Primes. Quintus Prime literally emotionally manipulated and scarred Mo through a fake bad ending reality because she doubted herself. No good person would do that, much less an actual ally. Even moreso on a child.

I seen this shit in Trollhunters but at least Jim, the main character, was a teenager. (It still was wrong though.) We also got remember that Liege Maximo and Megatronus/The Fallen are Primes. Yet somehow it is best to trust them.

Don't get me started with some of Optimus' choices when it comes to GHOST. He probably did it to protect his Autobots but what about the Decepticons who are locked away? Why are there so little of his companions with him especially since Bumblebee had fucking went into hiding before the show began.

There needs to be tension between Optimus with his Autobots. Someone is bound to snap and Bumblebee would have the biggest impact. The man clearly isn't okay as he's doing things that even Megatron admits ain't like him.

Mandroid needs to be written differently. He has the making of a sympathetic villain but oh boy. First off it is clear that his depiction is ableist aligned since the reason he doesn't like Cybertronians is because he lost his arm. Major thing to change right there.

Give him a narrative where his interest been genuine but slowly declines as the Autobot/Decepticon war increases the number of destroyed lives. Let him become a victim to this than just 'I lost my arm so death alongside experimentation to all Cybertronians'. Also don't make Mandroid ignore the obvious fact that the Transformers parts he puts into his body is slowly poisoning and instead come up with ways to fight the infection. Kinda like in Ironman 2 where Tony's arc reactor began to do the same thing.

Edit: Mandroid's negative views on Cybertronians are about the war and he's aware of the Energon poisoning. It is just that it is poorly portrayed to the point you rarely see it over his Arachnamechs/his ruined life.

Have the man present various evidence of destruction the war caused by both sides at the Malto children or anonymously spread such info around town to sew discontent with the townsfolk. 'These are the people who you consider heroes. Who you see as family and friends. Or should these tragedies be forgotten?'

Do a Baxter Stockman where you frequently see him try to fix the Energon poisoning than just simple dialogue. Even have testing on organic subjects to see how they react and find ways to counter it. Don't keep these key points as simple dialogue. *

I don't think Karen needs much changes either. 'But her taking over Cybertron doesn't make sense!' It actually does for one reason: hubris. Have you ever seen what happens when you give a control freak power? Their behavior becomes more erratic as they begin to think they deserve more. She is xenophobic in nature so imprisoning Decepticons and ordering around the Autobots is a drug to her.

Karen wants to treat them like slaves so the next step in her mind is Cybertron. Her death is well deserved and well played. Just like Icarus, the bitch flew too close to the sun.

I think the last major issue, other than out of character racist Shockwave, is the Terrans. No offense but they need a bit less screentime so the rest of the cast can shine. We barely see Alex and there's unclarified issues involving Bumblebee with Arcee if he's uncomfortable around her.

I also want their flaws to be at the forefront. Thrash is the only one who gotten such character development from his encounter with Swindle. We need more of that! Like Hashtag's overreliance on the Internet biting her back as she is forced to use real world skills.

Edit: I accidentally put in Terrans when I really meant Twitch. The screentime for everyone needs to be balanced mainly for the Malto family. Alex alongside the three younger Terrans rarely get involved or their characters further build upon. Twitch needs to get benched more.

Also the Dad Number 2 should really be addressed. Wheeljack was clearly uncomfortable when it been brought up. Plus it is way too fast to even consider such ideas unless you plan to have it addressed properly. Like 'Kid. We barely know each other yet somehow I became a father figure in an instant? It's best not to do that until you truly certain "Dad Number 2" doesn't mean harm or feels comfortable with it.' *

Earthspark clearly has potential but these problems need to be handled better. Addong the deleted scenes help add some clarification but canon needs to present it. We are supposed to get a second season so hopefully some of these are addressed.

[vaspider]

re: your (very informative) transmedicalism post.

would you say that the “cis people dont question their gender” concept is an offshoot of this concept? or is it perhaps something else i don’t have the name for

one of my cis friends has questioned about gender identity but ultimately decided that it was correct all along so it’s clearly not a foolproof concept that all questioning = trans.

i understand it to a degree (sort of) but it seems needlessly exclusive for cis people who want to understand gender (& their gender specifically) better - if youre told ‘no ur experience questioning makes you not cis’ then potentially you’d be apprehensive in even considering it (sometimes ignorance is bliss etc).

surely everyone examining their gender (cis or not!) is better for society’s norms, rather than grouping everyone, cis or trans, into trans just for wanting a better understanding of gender.

(thanks in advance! and sorry for my inability to be concise)

Yes, the practice of saying "if you ever even question then you must be that thing" is harmful on a lot of levels.

If cis people hear "you can't even question" then they'll never think about the complexity of gender or how they relate to gender and how even for cis people there are so many definitions of man and woman. That sucks!

And like... I think cis people really should think about and interrogate their gender, for their own sake. Like... what does man or woman, as an identity, actually mean to a person? What parts of it fit perfectly, what parts of it pinch a little like a new shoe? Figuring that stuff out can only make you feel more at home in your own skin. I mean, realizing that I really felt uncomfortable in dresses because I felt pressed to act out certain roles allowed me to change what I wore and become more comfortable in my own skin, why couldn't a cis woman do that and understand that she's interrogating her gender? My experience also came with a side of "oh, that's because I am not a woman and never was," but I don't think that's a necessary end point of interrogating gender.

Like, if even asking the question means the answer is yes... it's not a question. You have to be able to answer no.

I think that is part of why, honestly, when you ask cis people to think about how things like The Rock's top surgery was gender-affirming, or how breast augmentation (or reduction!) and tummy tucks and butt lifts for cis women can be gender-affirming, they react so defensively.

That's queerness in general, honestly. That idea that if you even think about it you must be it and the fear that people have of the consequences of being thought to be queer or trans? It's understandable that they'd react to the idea of even thinking about being queer with defensiveness. In some places, being thought by others to be queer or trans can ruin your fucking life, or end it.

One of the things that helps unwind that is contesting the idea that only queers ever consider that they might be queer, or so on. We can't expect the cishets to believe it if we treat our own that way, y'know?

So... yeah. If you think you might be trans... well. You might be trans. Then again, maybe you're just someone who is open to the possibility because there's nothing wrong with being trans, so there's nothing wrong with thinking you might be and then realizing you're not. That doesn't make you a liar, or infected with queer, or stupid, and it doesn't necessarily mean you're lying to yourself and just hiding in the closet bc you're scared, either. Might be the case. Might not be.

[leohtttbriar]

"if I hadn't realized what he had done"-- there are two very separate people in this sentence. the verb tenses are insane, too, because, like, kira is dead. but here jadzia is trying to blame yedrin for the second death-yet-to-come. making this the first time that jadzia has not claimed the shared-person of the symbiont as some form of self. maybe it's because yedrin is a future Self? but it doesn't ring true to how jadzia has acted about her various Persons before. in an almost mirror to the fake-doubling/separation that yedrin has "proposed" as a way for the crew to leave the planet while also staying, jadzia is not claiming yedrin's actions, even if he is technically jadzia (and curzon and joran and...) as well as himself. his decision to lie to them belongs, in some part, to her--it has to, since joined trill have never been shown to be able to truly distinguish their complex actions and decisions from one person to the other.

which means that jadzia is in this scene not just realizing she's responsible for kira's death (i mean, she's not) from the first time through the barrier but also responsible for kira's death again for this maneuver from yedrin (which, like, yes. she is within yedrin the whole episode. there are in fact two jadzias present).

with all time-traveling stories, there's a circular nature, since it's not like any of us are capable of imagining going faster than the speed of causality and escaping the single-direction-move along the temporal dimension of all 3D beings; which inevitably turns our time-travelling-stories into closed-circuit-deterministic-circular narratives or makes us lose our minds about butterfly theory. which is probably why the character who seems most comfortable with this whole situation is kira who's used to considering a future-already-written as just a law of reality. she references the prophets to odo and the others several times and you can't really argue that much with her because so far everything her gods have spoken has come true.

but jadzia i think is running up against determinism here not just from the situation itself (her future being told to her by her ancestors and the future dax host--her obvious discomfort with the idea of marrying worf according to their relationship in the present moment with the sort of flip side that is miles's discomfort with marrying someone who is not his wife in the present moment). in addition, i think she's struggling with the determinism associated with being joined. there's a weight to the fact that her person is not wholly controlled by her but cannot be separated from her. would jadzia choose to let kira die? no, not at first. but then she does because that's what kira wants--and everyone else sort of agrees. would jadzia lie in this way yedrin does to get her way? would jadzia "save" the lives of 8000 at the sacrifice of one? would jadzia betray her own self? would jadzia take a very difficult decision out of the hands of a past life, another self? she can't answer that question now, but also she can--because a future self does all of that, a future self that cannot be separated from her.

before this episode, obligations to the past-lives of the symbiont seemed to come easy to jadzia. well, not easy, but she doesn't spend a lot of time struggling with accepting them and carrying their burdens. here, she realizes she will be a burden for yedrin. so, on top of everything she thinks she's to blame for, she also now has to confront yedrin's existence, who carries kira's death as jadzia would. all of this seems exactly the kind of thing that jadzia, who will happily deal with the consequences of her past lives' crimes or the personal heartbreak of her own decisions, is not prepared for. she has not yet been in a situation where someone else has to carry her.

[moomv]

—till death do us part ; chapter four - loose strands of time

when a girl vows to save an ever-destined agency from death, even if she's been trying 106 different times and even if she's died 106 different times in the process.

-series masterlist

-word count. 2.7k

-genre. fic, comfort/angst, eventual romance

-tags. fem.reader, maybe ooc dazai??, small panic attack, mentions of blood

You were running out of time. 

You question now why you hadn’t started to act earlier. You question why you hadn’t started to plan sooner. 

You curse yourself now why you had been swayed by the sentimentality of beginning a new life, why you had done what you had. 

Foolish. 

You knew the consequences if you didn’t act, you knew how it went, you have been doing this 105 different times, you knew, so then why? 

Foolish.

You shouldn’t have brought yourself into the public by going with Osamu, you shouldn’t have followed Akutagawa and you shouldn’t have had met Fyodor. 

Foolish. 

Now you were out of time, the strings of fate squeezing every crevice of you, killing you with every breath it made, the guillotine of fate swung upon you for defying the all-knowing god. 

Foolish. 

Your lungs protested against every action you took, your stomach squeezed with the prospect of losing to him again. 

You weaved through the few people that occupied the street before catching up to Ranpo’s side, your hand still firmly latched onto his, the chill of the evening seeping into your clothes.

“Where are you taking me?”

He looked back down at the case file he held before answering your question, “A case.” 

You nodded, “Yes, but why all of a sudden?” 

He stopped midway down the street, “Wait- which way was the train station again?” he turned to you expectantly.

You smiled before taking the lead, “Seems things never change.” 

He huffed behind you, “I could if I used my ability. But it’s such a hassle when I have you.” 

You laughed, placing your hand on your chest dramatically, “I’m flattered,”

 You could practically see him smile behind you, “You should be, it’s a great honour you know.” 

You smiled, “Oh, of course.” you turned a corner just as you spoke, in the end coming into contact with the train station, a sea of people exited and entered the underground entrance. You turned to the brunette, “Here we are, where do you need to go?” 

“Kanagawa.” Ranpo let go of your hand and took out a lollipop from his pocket before opening the wrapper and folding the case file and shoving it into his pocket, he looked at you, “Want one?” 

You shook your head, “No, I’m okay.” 

He shrugged, before going back into motion and into the train station, you took a deep breath as you entered the sea of people, close behind Ranpo’s form.

“What’s happened in Kanagawa?” You asked, he rolled the lollipop around in his mouth before answering, “Murder case.” 

“Murder case?” You asked back.

He hummed, “Which way?” 

You pointed to a set of staircases, he followed where you directed before answering your previous question, “Something about a murdered man, probably his wife that killed him.” 

You pulled him in another direction, before frowning, “Are we meeting anyone and does Fuku-san know?” 

He nodded, “Yes and yes.” 

“Who are we meeting?” You questioned. 

Ranpo looked at you before sighing, “Do you have to ask so many questions?” 

You directed Ranpo to the station, “Here and yes I do.” he huffed, “Police. Now stop asking so many questions!”

You sighed, “Yes, yes.” 

Finally you the two of you arrived at your train’s location. Patiently the two of you waited for the arriving train, the crowds of the evening filling the room slowly, workmen and women, children and high schoolers, everyone and all and you regretted that Ranpo had to choose now for this little case. 

You never really did well in crowds, ever since that one incident. They always felt all-consuming, drowning you in each person, suffocating you till nothing was left, leaving you feeling breathless and dizzy. 

It wasn’t always so bad, sometimes you did okay and sometimes you were fine, but why is it so bad now? 

You went behind Ranpo, you could feel your head get a little bit lighter, the world meshing together in a fog of noise and people. You gripped the hem of your sleeves in an attempt to ease your body and chain you back to reality. Why, why, why, now? Why is it happening now?

You placed your head onto his shoulder to try and drown out the deafening noise of the outside world, you took another deep breath, the air burned your lungs, setting you aflame with invisible fire. 

Ranpo turned around and with one look at your state, grabbed his hat and placed it on your head, effectively covering your face and line of eyesight, hushing the rampat world that sat outside you and him.

You were grateful in that moment that he was so intuitive. 

“There, there, [Name]-chan, it’s okay.” His voice was quiet, a soothing calm to your storm, you took in another breath of air, the world clashing together in a fight for your attention.

He grabbed your hand again and then quickly walked away from the crowds of people. 

You arrived at a small nook, a bench and a vending machine sat in the little area. He sat you down on the nearby bench, while he went to grab drinks from the vending machine. 

The soft clang of coins and the beep of the vending machine filling in the noise. He came over to your side with a drink, gently he placed it in your hands before sitting down on the bench next to you with an exaggerated sigh. 

You took another breath, the world easing back together, thread and needle till you were only left with the ringing in your ears. “Sorry.”

He opened his drink before answering, “No need to be sorry, I should’ve known.” 

You tightened your grip on the can, “But-” 

He tilted his head to look at you, his eyes open, all-devouring seas that you couldn’t help but drown in. “It’s okay.” 

You looked up at him, your eyes widened before you looked back down, the spinning of the world coming to a sudden stop, you let out a breath that you didn’t know you were holding. “Still… I’m sorry. I became a burden again.” 

He closed his eyes, a childish smile suddenly overtaking his lips, “You could never be a burden to me.” 

Your hands gripped the can of your drink before easing into a delicate hold. You turned away from him, a small making itself home on your lips.

You hated the end of each life the most. 

When the fateful time came you were left with left with only a sense of failure. Failure at your own duty, you were supposed to protect them so why couldn’t you? Why do you always end in failure? Why-?

You have asked yourself that question a thousand times over, turning in your mind like a forever broken tune, a tune without melody a tune without words and forever did you come to the same conclusion that it was just fate’s sick way of taunting you, taunting you with forever what if’s and imaginary scenarios- What if… it says, that you joined the agency with a different ability and what if you never had to go through the hardships you’ve had to endure. What if… your parents never died and you happily lived with them, oblivious to the truths of the world and the cruelty you wouldn’t ever learn. 

What if- you died that day and never came back, you died and you were in death’s embrace, shielded away from fate’s hands and shielded away from the world. What if you weren’t dying right now? 

You could feel the bark of the tree behind you dig into your back, you could smell the metallic tang of blood in the air.

 Distantly you gazed at the sky, fluffy grey clouds and the sweet smell of soon rain on the horizon, how cliche, you think, to die in the rain. 

“[Name]-chan.” You hummed at your name, your thoughts filtering in through your mind in soft recollection. 

“What is it Dazai-san?” Your eyes flickered to the brunette, his face was smoothed out in a look of serenity, his eyes softened with the weight of your death on the near horizon, it almost looked like he didn’t care. But you knew he did, you knew that seeing you die and not being able to do anything because of the chance of his ability activating was crushing him. 

“” Dazai-san? ”’ He mocked your earlier words, “I thought we were closer than that.” A sliver of a smile appeared on his face, you smiled back at him. 

 “What is it Osamu?” you tried again and in the end pleasing the brunette. 

He looked down at his intertwined hands, “Promise me you won’t try to meet me when you go back.” 

You looked back at the approaching clouds, rain would soon dampen the ground and earth, you wondered if you would be alive to feel it. “I promise.” 

Dazai looked up at you, quick surprise flickering in his eyes before settling on realization, “You knew?” 

“Of course, I knew. I have lived countless times Osamu, this wasn’t our first meeting.” 

His eyes widened before he burst out into melancholy laughter, “Of course, you knew, of course.” 

You looked down at your reddened shirt, “I only have a few minutes left. I can’t feel my hands anymore.” 

Dazai stopped laughing, quietness stretching around the two of you in heavy weight, you sighed. “It’ll be okay.” you didn’t know if you were comforting yourself or him but nonetheless the words felt like a soothing balm on an aching wound. 

You looked back out at the sky again, “It’ll be okay, I’m used to this.” 

He stayed silent so you took that as your cue to continue, “It never is easy dying, even if I know I won’t really be dead.” you took in a shuttering breath, “That was the hardest part, not being able to die. You never know the luxury of it until it's been taken away.” 

“But I’m okay as long as I get to see everyone again, see you again.  I’m okay dying for you till the end of the world, as long as I get to be by everyone’s side, by yours… I’m okay.” 

“Why you?” He spoke it as though thought rather than question. His words hung heavy in the air, thick with a multitude of unsaid words shared between the two of you, if only you had more time, if only-

You took in a deep breath before gently shaking your head, your hair swaying with the movement, “I don’t know.” 

Dazai hung his head, his hair covering his expression, you wondered what he looked like, what his face read. “It’s not fair, is it?” 

You smiled, “No. But if I can protect you all I don’t care if it is.” each word you spoke got quieter and quieter, your voice mixing in with the soft wind of the air, each second your vision got darker and darker, fireflies of night consuming your vision whole. 

He sighed and brought his head back up, slowly he stood up and walked over to your slouched form, “How cruel this world is to you.” his voice was soft, a delicate blanket that draped over your body in warming comfort.

Your eyes eased shut, once more death kissing you with frosted reassurances that now felt futile in the weight of your ability, futile in the weight of eternity.

The sun peacefully shined in the distance, alighting the world in warm hues of yellow. You basked in the presence of it while Ranpo talked to the police officers. 

“The wife did it.” He stated it matter-of-factly, the officer in front of him swallowed hard before gesturing to another officer, a silent command.

Ranpo took off his glasses and pocketed them. The officer in front of him nodded twice, “Right.” he noted down on the notepad before swallowing again, “...The evidence?” 

“In their garden shed, a knife with her fingerprints and his blood.” Ranpo turned to you afterwards, you sighed already knowing what he wanted. “Things really don’t change, hm? You're still the greatest detective it seems.” 

Ranpo laughed, “Of course I am!” 

You smiled gently, your heart all too aching to see his smile forever bright, forever radiant. “Good job, Ranpo.” 

Ranpo beamed before pulling his hands behind his head and sauntering off, “Let’s go, [Name]-chan, I want to try out the new bakery near the agency.” 

You nodded to the officer, “Case solved, yes?” 

He straightened up, “Yes! Thank you for your help.” 

“You really should be thanking…” You looked in the direction of Ranpo, he was silently watching the exchange, impatience laced within his features, you sighed. “Ah, never mind. That will be all. Have a good day.” You dipped your head before walking over to Ranpo. 

Ranpo took your hand once you were close enough before starting to walk down the street. 

“I didn’t bring my wallet you know.” 

Ranpo huffed, “Fine. I’ll buy them this time then.” 

You giggled, a smile easing its way to your lips, “Ranpo buying me a treat? How unheard of!” 

He huffed again, false exasperation filling his breath, “It won’t happen again. Don’t get used to it.” 

You came up to his side, before smiling at him, “Thank you, Ranpo, truly.” 

He stayed silent, his eyes focused on the street ahead of him, his eyes pure emerald, you admired the colour before looking ahead again. Warm comfort filling every bone, you were glad you were back. Back within their embraces of warmth and never-ending affection, back within their words and protection, truly, if it was for them, you would do anything. 

You had first met Dazai at the beginning of your 13th life, 13th attempt. 

You were still new to going back, you were still new to everything, your ability, everyone forgetting you and dying, you were still new at it.

You had met him when the sun descended into the horizon, darkness stealing away the world in temporary bliss. 

You had just gotten back from getting sweets for Ranpo. He was sitting by the window, Kunikida was talking his ear off, comical shouts coming from the blonde. Dazai was smiling, a loose type of smile, a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes.

The rest of the agency was empty, except for you four. You dropped the bag of sweets on Ranpo’s desk, he gleamed happily up at you before digging into the bag. 

You walked over towards the two, “Who is this?” you asked the blonde. He stopped shouting at the brunette and spun around.

Quickly he straightened himself and pushed his glasses up, “New agency member. [L.Name]-san meet Dazai, Dazai meet [L.Name]-san.” 

You titled your head to the side, “Dazai? Have we met before? That name sounds familiar.” 

He blinked a couple of times before getting up and gently grabbing your hand, “No, I would have remembered a beauty like you.” 

Kunikida quickly hit him with his notebook, a comically loud thunk echoing in the room, “Show some respect, you idiot!” 

You smiled, “No need to be so harsh, Kunikida, I don’t mind. What’s your first name, Dazai-san?” 

“Dazai Osamu,” Gently he rubbed the back of his head with his hand. 

“[L.Name], [Name]. It's a pleasure to meet you, Dazai-san.” 

Dazai smiled, “As it is to meet you, [L.Name]-chan!” 

Kunikida huffed, “You don’t need to show so much respect towards him, [L. Name]-san,” he glared at the brunette, “he doesn’t deserve it.” 

Dazai blew air, “How cruel, Kunikida-kun!” 

You laughed, “It only feels fitting,” sheepishly you rubbed the back of your neck, “I’d feel awkward otherwise.”

Kunikida pushed his glasses up, “You’re lucky you scoundrel. But if I ever catch you harassing [L.Name]-san again, you’ll get more than just a warning.” 

Dazai held his hands as though guilty, “Yes, yes.” 

You giggled before walking over to the brunette and you held out your hand, “Let’s work together well, Dazai-san.” 

Dazai smiled this time and this time it reached his eyes, molten brown that seemed to quell all other senses. He took hold of your hand, “It’s a pleasure to work with you, [L.Name]-chan.” 

[previous chapter] [next chapter]

[coraniaid]

I think that Ted is a good episode -- I almost described it as an underrated episode, but actually everyone I know seems to rate it pretty highly – and one that clearly anticipates significant future episodes like Consequences and Dead Things.  The character of Ted himself seems like a decent first attempt at the Mayor (my favorite villain in the show); his actual origin foreshadows April and the Buffybot; and Buffy’s fear of what might happen if her mother reads her diary feels like an early taste of Normal Again. And it's honestly unsettling in a way that most Buffy episodes aren't; there's a very visceral clash between Buffy's (and the audience's) genre expectations and all the creepy domestic stuff with Ted, right from the start of the episode.

So there's a lot to like here. But.  It's pretty odd that the first of several "Hey, what if a vampire slayer killed a human being?  Obviously that would be terrible" episodes aired immediately after What's My Line?, a two-parter in which Buffy Summers rips open a man's throat with the blades of her ice skates, gently kisses her boyfriend while the man bleeds out on the ice and never ever feels the slightest bit bad about it. His death isn't even mentioned again (and, despite the premise of the episode, it doesn’t seem like anybody else is sent to replace him).

Okay, yes, we don't know for certain that the assassin Buffy killed at the ice skating rink was a human, but we do know he definitely wasn't a vampire (we see him walking around in the sunlight and he doesn't turn to ash when he dies), he looked far more human-like than any of the demons we've seen on the show before (and takes the bus to get to Sunnydale, which certainly suggests a lack of any alternate demonic options), and the episode's writers seem to make a deliberate point, after his death, of having Giles tell Buffy that the order of assassins he belonged to definitely does include humans among their ranks.  If they wanted us to be sure he wasn’t human, that’s a weird way of doing it.

(Perhaps the clearest argument against the ice rink assassin being a human is the way he seems equally matched in a physical confrontation with Angel, but the show is very inconsistent about whether ordinary humans can fight vampires or how strong vampires actually are.  Indeed the second part of What’s My Line? will see Giles himself overpower a vampire, “holding him steady” so that Willow can stake him.  He'll also grapple with a vampire later in this episode while patrolling in Buffy's place. Are we to assume Giles isn’t human?)

Even if the dead assassin wasn't "really" a human, Buffy doesn't have any obvious reason not to at least wonder that he might be.  The fact she doesn’t,  or doesn’t particularly care if he was, is because … well, because What’s My Line? isn't about that.

And yes, Buffy was very clearly acting in self-defense in What's My Line? and I don't particularly think she did anything wrong.  A strange guy was trying his best to hurt her, he surprised her in a place she thought she was safe, and if she hadn't had her Slayer strength things would have worked out very poorly for her.  But isn't all of that true for Ted as well?  

Actually, I think that’s the more serious problem with the episode.  Beyond any possible inconsistency with previous parts of canon (obviously you can assume the dead assassin was a demon if you want) there’s a tension between the moral quandary the show wants to raise this episode -- "what if Buffy used her Slayer powers to kill an innocent man?" -- and the fact the writers seem to really not want to show Buffy doing anything wrong, so much so that they kind of forget to make Ted seem anything like an innocent man, even before the big twist.

That is: the show wants to tell us that Buffy has crossed an important moral line and that – if Ted really had been an ordinary human – she’d probably deserve to go to jail for it.  That’s why her friends are so concerned with proving that Ted was not an ordinary human, at least that he was “some kind of crook”. It's why they decide she's "cleared" only when they find evidence of the drugs he was feeding them.

Whatever Ted was doing in her bedroom late at night, the show seems to argue that Buffy is the Slayer and as such “had no right” to hit him. ("He started it only works in six year old court," Buffy rebukes Willow later.) Cordelia tries comes to Buffy’s defense by suggesting there should be “special rules for her”, an idea the show (through Willow) shoots down as “fascist”. And all this plays out almost as though Buffy really had just started attacking Ted unprovoked because he was dating her mother and she didn’t like him.

But that isn’t at all what happened.  It’s very on brand for Buffy to act as though it is, and to blame herself for something that really isn't her fault, but it’s a little much to expect the audience to agree when we've actually seen the whole thing play out in front of our own eyes.  The cops are suspicious of Buffy’s claims of self-defense because she doesn’t have any visible bruises (and because ... they're cops), but we already know she isn’t lying.  Her friends should believe she isn’t lying.  They shouldn't need evidence of "a history of domestic violence". We already saw him hit her. That's not something you get a free pass for. It doesn't matter if he's not been convicted of doing it before.

And so I’m not convinced at all there’s any need to appeal to “special rules” for Buffy.  We see exactly what she did on screen, and I simply don’t think that she did anything wrong.  (Well, except confess to the cops.) Even if Ted had just been a normal human, he's a near stranger who surprises Buffy in her own bedroom, proceeds to blackmail her and to announce he’ll have her institutionalized if she doesn’t follow his orders, and who then hits her repeatedly – hard enough to knock her to the ground on at least one occasion.  How does that scene play out if Buffy isn’t a Slayer?  If she really is just a delusional sixteen year old girl and the diary Ted's gotten hold of describes some sort of fantasy?  Not very well for her, I can guess that much.

Of course, Cordelia’s wrong to suggest that “different rules” should apply to Buffy simply because she’s the Slayer, but equally the show is wrong to imply that the ordinary moral rules that apply to everyone somehow mean a teenage girl has no right to protect herself from being physically attacked in her own home. (Or to suggest, as Buffy herself does, that that right to self-defense somehow ends the minute she turns out to be stronger than the guy hitting her was expecting, even if that doesn't mean he stops hitting her.).  

What if all teenage girls were allowed to kill any strange men who broke into their bedrooms at night, threatened to ruin their lives unless they did “what I say, when I say” and then punched them hard enough to knock them to the floor?  Well, I think that would be pretty good actually.  I'm not really sure what the downside is supposed to be.

[antianakin]

@theneutralmime

So again I'm going to hit this in a few parts because I think there's a few different things happening depending on the situation.

Plo's insistence that they will be found in the Malevolence arc is serving two purposes: he's presumably choosing to have faith in the Force which could be telling him to keep hope, AND he's saying what needs to be said to keep his men's spirits up. If they go into this fight believing it's hopeless anyway, then the chances are a LOT higher that they'll end up dead, whereas if they keep a little more faith in their chances of being found, it'll give them the best chance possible. He's also just trying to lift up the clones' self-esteem in GENERAL because they're mentioning that they're "expendable" which is why they have no hope in being rescued. It's not that they think the situation is completely unsalvagable, but that nobody would bother risking their lives to save a few clones when there's so many of them and they can be so easily replaced. What Plo is doing here isn't that far off from what Yoda does just the episode before with Thire, Jek, and Rys: he's affirming that he sees the clones as PEOPLE worthy of caring about and fighting for, not because they're tools he needs in the war but just because they're THEM. There is nothing else Plo can do in this situation aside from keeping them alive as long as possible, and the best way he can do that is to keep their hopes up and keep them fighting. So regardless of whether he personally believes their chances of discovery are high or not, their best chance is for Plo to convince the clones he believes they'll be found.

ANAKIN'S reaction is completely separate from that (unless you believe that Plo is sort-of listening to the Force which is telling him to keep up hope and that that's possibly coming from Anakin and Ahsoka's choices here). Anakin is basically just bending the rules here because he can tell Ahsoka cares about this. I don't personally believe Anakin would've ACTUALLY gone after Plo in this situation if Ahsoka hadn't been there and being so vocal about her feelings on the matter. I think Anakin likely would've recognized the situation as a pretty foregone conclusion and continued on in his own mission. Keep in mind that this isn't the first attack by the Malevolence and in the other situations, there were no survivors. There's no actual reason to believe Plo is alive this time and it's a LOT more logical to assume that he didn't make it. Ahsoka is being emotional because she's young and she cares about Plo and wants to abandon her own mission in order to go check on someone she cares about, which is something that could potentially have dire consequences in other areas.

What Anakin does is try to find a loophole of sorts that allows them to still complete their original mission while accomplishing this other task, too. And while this logic works out for him, it assumes that nothing is going to happen to his fleet on the way to their final destination while he's gone. He is, effectively, abandoning his entire battalion in order to go save ONE PERSON (because I don't for a SECOND believe he cares about the 104th, he only cares about Plo because that's who AHSOKA cares about). If the 501st had gotten attacked mid-route somehow or they'd had issues along the way, they were left without either Jedi General or Commander to help them out. Yes, Plo and his three men would've died, but losing an entire fleet (which would be in ADDITION to losing Plo's entire battalion) would be far worse in the long run.

And this is why Anakin keeps getting away with acting like this. He takes massive risks in the name of emotional attachments that COULD have dire consequences but he manages to just keep getting lucky, which he convinces himself means that he was RIGHT. But that's not how it works, it's not the same thing. And eventually, that kind of thinking is going to lead him down the wrong path and he won't get so lucky.

You can also look at this situation like the trolley problem. Ideally, they'd like to just stop the trolley before it gets to either line with people on it. But if they CAN'T stop the trolley in time (and they have no control over which line it goes to), and the trolley's now hit that line with one person on it, is it better to go check and see if that one person survived being hit or is it better to go get the other people off the trolley line so they DON'T get hit by a trolley at all? It's possible another trolley might never come down, it's possible that that one person is still alive and could survive if only they're attended to in time. But it's also just as possible that a second trolley might come down and hit those other people on the other track while you're off saving that one person who's already been hit.

Now let's look at Luminara on Geonosis during the factory explosion. Here we get a more direct comparison between how a REAL Jedi handles the possibility of losing someone they care about and how ANAKIN handles the possibility of losing someone he cares about. The main difference for me here is the way they ultimately end up treating EACH OTHER. There's zero evidence that Luminara WOULDN'T have supported Anakin's attempts at finding them, and in fact there's actually evidence to support that Luminara was ALSO trying to look for them when she knelt down on the ground to meditate (something Anakin, like most of the fandom, tends to misinterpret as Luminara dropping to her knees in grief). When Anakin sees what he THINKS is Luminara losing herself to emotion, he's completely capable of being compassionate and reaching out to comfort Luminara, but when she responds that she's actually okay and will deal with Barriss's death if it happens, his compassion EVAPORATES. Almost like it was never even there and wasn't truly compassion in the first place (it's not that selfless if it's only offered when she adheres to HIS idea of how to properly grieve). And he never gives her the benefit of the doubt after this, never tries to understand her perspective AT ALL. All he does is continue to provoke her and harass her and then when they DO find Barriss and Ahsoka, Anakin IMMEDIATELY chooses to throw Luminara under the bus and accuse her of not caring about her own padawan RIGHT IN FRONT OF BARRISS.

Luminara, by contrast, continuously reaches out to Anakin to offer HIM compassion. Even in the face of his being a complete and utter asshole, his anger and selfishness towards her, she recognizes that this is Anakin GRIEVING the possibility of having lost Ahsoka, and so she offers selfless comfort ANYWAY. Even as he lashes out at her, even as he rejects her comfort and advice, she keeps offering it. Because she's a TRUE Jedi while Anakin is only a Jedi in name and nowhere is that more obvious than in this super direct parallel.

And you can compare this later to the advice Plo gives Anakin about Ahsoka during the Padawan Lost arc where he says that all Anakin can do at this point is trust that he's given her enough training to find her own way home. When there's nothing Anakin can truly do to help, he just has to trust in Ahsoka and trust in the Force to guide her. He has to trust he's been a good enough teacher. And in both the Geonosis episode with Luminara and the Padawan Lost arc with Plo, Ahsoka DOES manage to save herself. Anakin isn't really the person who does anything to save Ahsoka on Geonosis because he has no idea where to even start looking and it's a large area to search and they don't have enough time to search everywhere. Ahsoka sends a signal that gets through to the others, though, and THAT'S what saves her. It's something Anakin taught her before, sure, but nothing Anakin is doing right now in this moment is helping and THAT'S what Luminara is trying to impress upon him. All they can do right now, just like Plo and his men with the Malevolence, is trust in the Force and WAIT. Luminara is keeping herself calm, focused, and centered because getting emotional isn't going to help Barriss. Anakin getting emotional certainly doesn't help Ahsoka.

This is also a lesson we see pop up in other areas, as well. We see Obi-Wan getting taught a similar lesson during AOTC where he has to just trust he's taught Anakin well enough that he can manage his own obstacles and fix his own mistakes on a solo mission. He has to let go of his worries and doubts enough to let Anakin go because that's just how growing up works. And while we as the audience know that there's absolutely good reason to worry about Anakin being able to handle a solo mission, the Jedi aren't wrong to advise Obi-Wan to give Anakin room to make his own mistakes so he can grow. Also, in the episode JUST PRIOR to the one with Luminara, Landing at Point Rain, we see Anakin dealing with the loss of a loved one in the RIGHT way. Obi-Wan's ship crashes and Anakin is stuck far away and they don't know if Obi-Wan is injured or even alive. But Anakin is also still with Ahsoka and their troops, trying to get to the original landing site. Anakin COULD run ahead and try to get to Obi-Wan's ship to help him, but he'd be abandoning everybody else in order to do so and there's tons of enemies between them and the landing site, so the chances that they'd make it without his help are slim at best. So when Ahsoka starts getting emotional about wanting to help Obi-Wan, Anakin has to be the one to teach her this and tell her that they can't just go running off when it means abandoning other people to die. All they can do is protect the people they have the ability to protect and trust that in the Force and in Obi-Wan's own abilities.

So it's not like Anakin doesn't KNOW how he's supposed to handle this situation. He literally does EXACTLY what Luminara does JUST THE LAST EPISODE and teaches this exact fucking lesson to his own Padawan like the day before. And yet, when he's losing it and someone else is having to remind him about it, he can't take his own advice. He forgets everything he's ever learned and instead becomes a complete asshole to someone who has done nothing to deserve it.

So the lesson here isn't that you should never do anything to try to help people that MIGHT be dead, it's about prioritizing and knowing what it is you CAN do in the situation. With Plo, Anakin and Ahsoka CAN go save Plo, sure, but it means making a concession somewhere else. They prioritize saving Plo over staying with their own battalion. Plo has to prioritize keeping his men alive which means he has to choose to be optimistic even in the face of low odds because all he CAN do is keep fighting to stay alive as long as possible. Anakin can't REALLY do anything for Ahsoka when the factory explodes because he just has too little information to act on and this drives him NUTS. AHSOKA can work on sending a signal to him, but all Anakin can do is WAIT and have faith that Ahsoka will find a way out. Anakin's not so good at the faith thing, though, just canonically. Anakin doesn't like letting go of that much control in his life (or the lives of people he cares about). Luminara, however, CAN let go of the need to have control over everything and is doing what little she CAN do, which is reaching out with the Force to see if she can sense where Barriss is and keeping herself calm and focused.

Anakin IS wrong both times. The fact that things work out for him both times doesn't make him right in either instance. Remember, the exact things that cause him to make the choices he does HERE are the same things he uses to convince himself it's okay to commit a genocide against the Jedi later in order to save Padme. It's the exact same reasoning, he just gets lucky these times and gets LESS lucky later.