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trulybetty · 5 months

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dec' x 21 - wrapping paper

Prompt: wrapping paper Pairing: dieter x ofc!bryony Word Count: 993 Warnings: domestic fluff, tiny bit of French you can Google translate if you wish, it's also dieter - he has his own warnings Summary: Dieter and Bryony put up the tree - nothing much else to it. I was inspired heavily by one of @wildemaven's moodboards for this! AO3: Linked

x. masterlist

A/N: still not well, but have enough whereabouts to post what's already written over the next couple of days, so if you're following along at home - enjoy!

Dieter, with a flourish, finished draping the last strands of tinsel around a gold-framed black and white portrait of Dolly Parton, one of many that decorated the living room wall. It brought a touch of kitsch to the holiday decor that was already out and filling the living room.

“Dieter, there’s tinsel everywhere” Bryony laughed, plucking a stray piece from her hair.

“It’s Christmas Daff,” he offered up as if explanation enough, “If tinsel isn’t sticking to you by the end of it, have you even decorated?” he retorted.

Dieter, ever the enthusiast for the festive season, had already placed the giant nutcracker hippos on the driveway, much to Bryony’s chagrin. “Every time I see those monstrosities,” she had muttered more than once, “I have dreams of running them down with my car.” She knew she’d never actually do it – partly because of the security cameras, and partly because deep down, they were a bizarre but endearing part of their Christmas traditions now.

But mostly because of the security cameras.

The tree stood tall and grand in the corner of the room, its branches bare and awaiting adornment. Boxes of decorations lay open at their feet, a mishmash of colours and styles, each with its own story. No real theme present, just an eclectic mix of both of their tastes.

Bryony with her elegant and timeless decor complimented Dieter’s ostentatious rainbow of decorations ranging from vintage baubles to a rubber duck dressed as Elvis.

Bryony picked up a bauble, inspecting it with a smile. “Do you remember this one?” she asked, holding up the glittery ornament. “We got it at that Christmas market in Cardiff.”

Dieter raised a pointed eyebrow, “How could I forget? You spent twenty minutes deciding between that one and another one that looked exactly the same.”

Then, Dieter reached into a box and pulled out a series of hippo-themed decorations. “Ah, the pièce de résistance,” he declared, holding them up for Bryony to see.

She groaned playfully. “No not the hippos again, please? Can we have a reprieve this year?”

He gasped dramatically, “Bryony Morgan, it's tradition!" he said in a very rare instance of using her full name as she rolled her eyes.

“Fine.” she conceded, not that she’d have any real say as three hippos had already graced the tree in the time it’d taken her to object.

Finally, the tree was a riot of colours, lights, and memories—every ornament had its place, and every light twinkled in merriment. Dieter stepped back, a satisfied grin on his face.

“Now for the passementerie,” he declared.

The sound of rustling paper drew Bryony's attention. Dieter had disappeared for a moment, only to return with an armful of gifts, each wrapped in paper that was undeniably Dieter—bright, bold, and bordering on the obscene.

Bryony eyed the wrapping paper warily as Dieter began placing the gifts under the tree. “Dieter, what is on that wrapping paper?”

He looked up, an impish grin on his face. “Oh, you know, just some tasteful nudes. Quite artistic, really.”

Bryony squinted at the paper, “Artistic?” she asked as she got an eyeful of a black and white sketched erect penis with holly framing its balls.

Dieter beamed with pride. “It's a festive little number I found online. Quite avant-garde, don't you think?”

“This is for my gifts?” she asked, wondering why she was even questioning it.

“Who else?” he chuckled, placing a particularly large gift front and center, two large breasts framed the centre of the gift above a bright pink bow. “Only the best for you, Daff,” Dieter replied, winking at her.

Before Bryony could formulate a response, something caught her eye. Hanging among the branches, nestled between the lights and tinsel, was a small Cartier box, its red hue unmistakable. She hadn’t noticed it when they were finishing up the tree, she was sure she wouldn’t have missed it.

“Dieter, what's this?” she asked, her voice suddenly soft.

He came up behind her, his chin resting on her shoulder.

“Oh, that old thing?” Dieter feigned nonchalance, but the twinkle in his voice betrayed his excitement. “Just a little something for you.”

Bryony’s voice caught in the back of her throat, it was a box big enough to be any number of things. The whispers of the tinsel seemed to quieten as she unhooked the box, her mind racing with the possibilities of what lay inside.

Dieter's presence behind her was a solid reassurance, his breath warm against her ear as he whispered, “Go on, open it.”

She glanced back at him, searching his eyes for a clue. “Dieter, this isn't…” Her voice trailed off, the unspoken question hanging between them.

He shook his head, a gentle smile softening his features. “Not yet,” he said with a quiet conviction that made her heart skip a beat. “But when the time comes, and it will, it's going to be everything you deserve and more.”

With deliberate care, Bryony opened the box, she let out a breath she hadn't realized she was holding. Inside lay a delicate necklace, its simplicity and elegance a stark contrast to the vibrant chaos of their Christmas tree. It was beautiful – a classic and understated piece. While the exact opposite of Dieter, much like Bryony herself, so very much him in its thoughtfulness.

“Wow–I don’t know what to say,” she managed to breathe out.

“Well that’s a first for you Daff.”

She fixed him with a look before tracing the outline of the solo square diamond that hung delicately on the white gold chain, “It’s beautiful Dieter, thank you.”

Dieter's hand lifted to cradle her jaw, his thumb tracing her cheek. “Just like you mon chéri.”

Bryony lifted her hair as she allowed him to clasp the necklace around her throat, the cool weight of it felt like a comfort as he adjusted it to sit just right.

Dieter leaned in, his forehead resting against hers. “Merry Christmas, Bryony,” he murmured.

#december x 500 #dieter x bryony #dieter bravo #dieter bravo x ofc #dieter bravo x ofc!bryony #dieter bravo fanfiction #dieter bravo fanfic #pedro pascal character fanfiction

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lucreziaq2001 · 6 months

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•TV show: "Criminal minds".

•Content warnings: Bullying the victim is blamed for and the culprit partially tries to justify, mentions of the fact that someone was humiliated in front of all his friends and his bad boy reputation was kind of ruined, mentions of the fact that a girl apparently made most of her schoolmates uncomfortable and of fights between her and another girl, plus this other girl being referred to as "vicious" by her former boyfriend and a man trying to flirt (in a way) with the daughter of the writer who is questioning him.

•Some of the lines are almost the same that are in a scene of the "Cold case" episode this story is inspired by. I did modify them a bit, though. I didn't just copy and paste them.

•Tags: @lex13cm, @golden1u5t, @avis-writeshq, @chrrysgirl, @hugyourlungs, @achillmango, @marie-sworld, @iluvreid, @babygirl-garcia, @rynwritesreid, @strangermoonlove.

The bridge to Heaven

Chapter 6: Aaron Hotchner

After hearing what Matthew had to say, as the man had predicted, everyone almost immediately agreed to cooperate.

"Good. Then if it's okay with you, I'd like to ask you some questions in another room, one person at a time" David then said, and again, everyone agreed to it.

It took longer that time, maybe because they understood that even though Dave wasn't a policeman and hadn't used the word "interview", they were considered suspects.

In the end, however, they accepted.

Aaron asked to be the first person to be questioned, just as David hoped, so the two men went into the dining room and closed the door, then the interrogation began.

"Aaron Hotchner. Elizabeth Prentiss has told me a lot about you" Dave began.

He wasn't lying.

The day after the one of their brief meeting, Emily's mother had asked one of the nurses at retirement home she lived in to look up David's phone number and had called him, mainly to talk to him about the difficult relationship between her daughter and Aaron Hotchner.

"You had quite the bad boy reputation in high school. Ladies' man, cool car" he added a few seconds later, and Aaron laughed, clearly pleased that Dave knew those things about him too.

"I still have it, actually, it's in my garage. Maybe your middle daughter wants to come take a spin. Her name is Diane, right? I've heard she's single and she and I are almost the same age" he then said, and although David didn't like the fact that Aaron was practically hitting on his daughter, he couldn't help but smile.

"Some people, at least for certain things, never change" he thought, shaking his head, then he decided to continue with the interrogation.

"I'll ask her" he replied "But let's get back to us now. People still remember those crazy races near the pine forest".

"Undefeated. All through high school" Aaron boasted "That car was like a rocket".

"Oh. Actually, I heard a different story" David replied, finally getting to the point "One night, you lost a race and were humiliated in front of all your friends by a girl".

"Who? Emily Prentiss? Oh, she wasn't like other girls" Aaron replied.

Thankfully, he had clearly changed his opinion on Emily over the years.

"You used to bully Emily at school, and after she showed you off, you only hated her more" Dave said, and as a response, at first Aaron just nodded.

"Now I regret what I did, but I also still partly think that if she had just dressed like a woman, no one would have made fun of her" Aaron told him, partly trying to justify the actions of his teenage self.

"You felt threatened by her, didn't you, Aaron?" Dave then asked him, irritated by the man's attempt to blame Emily for his mistakes.

"She made me feel uncomfortable, actually!" Aaron responded "She did it to everyone, even the girls".

"Are you saying Emily had argued with one of them too?" David then asked, not really expecting those words from the man sitting in front of him.

"Oh, yes!" Aaron exclaimed "I think you know how some women are: vicious. And my girlfriend at the time was just like that".

Then he too, just like Elizabeth Prentiss had done over the phone, began to talk about an event he had kept secret for almost fourty years.

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sophiainspace · 27 days

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How long did you have the idea for and how much plot was ready/sorted out when you started writing "An Honest Thief"?

How I had the idea: I had Covid in October. I was in bed rewatching a big chunk of season 1, and I ended up watching through an Iris-focused lens. How did she feel about the extreme number of people she cared about who lied to her, over months? (They only sort of addressed that in the show - she got mad with Joe and Barry, but forgave them pretty quickly, to my mind.) Then I got to the Snart episodes and of course started thinking about Coldwest and how, if they'd known each other, he wouldn't have lied to her - he'd have been brutally honest, maybe to the point that she would have found it a bit much. And that's where the idea grabbed me.

How much plot was ready: I wrote about 8000 words in a few days, whenever I could sit up.* I drafted everything up to just after Iris finding out who the Flash was...

...and then it became clear this was going to be a fic partly focused on Iris being aro, and I went shit because I didn't feel qualified to write that. Whatever that means - I mean, I don't believe the purity culture nonsense that you can only write a thing if you've lived it, and also I am grey/demiromantic, but I've never thought about that very much - until this fic! So I slowed down in the second half and tried to work out where things would go once Iris knew the truth, and got help from the excellent @achangeinpriorities (who has now looked at many snippets and commented on the aro rep - thanks!), and generally floundered around a lot. This is not how I usually write - I tend to plot out a fic from the beginning, even if things change while writing - so it's been a rollercoaster. I think the tone of the fic has shifted, which might have lost me readers, but I'm having fun and that's what matters.

I did not have a resolution in mind at any point (except I'd planned one final scene with Len and Iris). As you can probably tell by the whole thing with the Coldflash side ship and then Coldwestallen hitting me out of left field (although that's prob not to be resolved until a hypothetical sequel). I thought this thing would have about 5 chapters - it's currently up to 10, with at least one more to go. I've been scrambling around for an ending for weeks, and the perfect one just hit me, the other day. Which is great, as if I write too many more chapters of this thing, I'll lose even more readers than have already stopped bothering with this weird monster of a fic ;)

Which, honestly, I'm not surprised this one hasn't had many readers. The Flash fandom isn't very active now - the remaining fans are mostly Coldflash folks (a ship I like but don't write very well). But post-show tiny fandoms are my favourite place to write fic (hence all my years in the Buffy fandom). You get a few dedicated readers (like you, Toby!), and you lap up all the fic that's still being written, and it all becomes much more friendly than a huge fandom ever could be.

Thank you for the question! 🩶

*Despite being really quite sick, apparently my muse was still very active in churning out fic nonsense. Brains are weird.

Talk Shop Tuesday

#an honest thief #the flash fanfic #coldwest #coldflash #coldwestallen #my fic #iris west #leonard snart

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taminoarticles · 1 year

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— Tamino for Gazet van Antwerpen, February 2017 (x)

Child prodigy Tamino, after recognition in 'De Nieuwe Lichting': “I don't want to be the new Jeff Buckley”

Finding shelter with the management of dEUS and Balthazar, and being allowed to debut on the record label of Het Zesde Metaal and Trixie Whitley: things are going fast for Tamino. A week after the 20-year-old from Antwerp was chosen as one of the laureates of Studio Brussel's De Nieuwe Lichting, he captivated Flanders with the captivating song Habibi. “But I don't want to be the Flemish Jeff Buckley,” emphasizes the confident young man.

gunter jacobs Saturday, February 11, 2017 at 8:53 PM

Tamino impresses. In November he already made jaws drop when he was a guest in Trix in the Radio 1 session of Het Zesde Metaal. Listeners from Studio Brussels voted him last week in the final of De Nieuwe Lichting as one of the laureates from more than 800 promising young artists. Since then, more and more people are discovering this special twenty-year-old singer-guitarist.

The comments on YouTube under the clip of his first single Habibi do not lie. "It's been a long time since I've been so overwhelmed by a voice and a melody," someone writes. “Absolutely beautiful. Beautiful chord progressions and what a vocal range,” another new fan exults.

Tamino does not come completely out of nowhere. “I've been playing music in all kinds of groups since I was fourteen, from punk and desert rock to more danceable music. Solo I now bring the music that I have to make on my own.” His name has been buzzing in Antwerp for a long time. Last year he also did support programs for Trixie Whitley and Bazart.

Nice reactions

“Especially after the Radio 1 session in Trix, I noticed that suddenly a lot of people had discovered me. When I performed in café Trefpunt in Ghent afterwards, not everyone could even enter. With De Nieuwe Lichting I have gained a whole new audience. While I didn't even expect to make it to the final. I even doubted for a long time whether I should register; I don't like competition in music. That is why I will no longer participate in competitions, although I received many nice reactions after De Nieuwe Lichting. A friend who has seen that it is now starting to work out for me, let me know that she is inspired to do her own thing as well. I think that's super cool.”

Named by his opera-loving parents after the prince from Mozart's The Magic Flute, Tamino's full name is Tamino-Amir Moharam Fouad, has partly Egyptian roots and lives in Mortsel with his Belgian mother. “I do want to live alone, but for now I find living at home especially useful,” he confesses. “I lived in Amsterdam for 2.5 years to study at the conservatory there. Two weeks ago I decided to take a break. Because my education really can't be combined with my career for a while.”

From Mortsel to Amsterdam

“At the conservatory I follow the pop training. The focus is on their own music. When I was seventeen I went there on my own. Believe me, going from Mortsel to Amsterdam was a huge step. There I learned to stand my ground and become more assertive. The fact that students come from all over, from Denmark and Germany to Latvia and Israel, has broadened my horizon.”

“I can also easily do my thing in Antwerp. I don't belong to a particular scene, but thanks to Tom Pintens, with whom I recorded my first record, I do get to know many well-known musicians. When we were recording at his house, Gregory Frateur and Het Zesde Metaal would sometimes drop by.”

For that first record, a five-song EP that will be released in May, Tamino has a deal with Unday Records, the record label of Het Zesde Metaal, Trixie Whitley and Dans Dans, among others. In anticipation of that debut, the compelling Habibi has been launched as a digital business card. “That number is already old. I wrote it two years ago, when I was eighteen, in Amsterdam,” the young man clarifies. To add with a timid laugh: “Like many songs, it is about love. I don't want to say more about it. Let people make their own interpretation of it.”

Tamino's partly oriental roots shine through in Habibi. His grandfather, Moharam Fouad, turns out to be a well-known singer-actor in the Arab world. “Unfortunately he passed away when I was five. Well, I didn't know him. Yet my grandfather plays a role in what I do. At home, my mother always puts on Arabic music, including my grandfather's. I have many recordings of him that inspire me.”

Tamino tells how he rescued a decaying guitar from his grandfather's house while cleaning up. He is currently having it refurbished to give it a second life. Although he was born in Belgium, his heart also leans towards the Middle East. “I lived in Egypt for a while, but unfortunately I don't know Arabic. I would like to learn that someday. The intensity in my singing and the romantic character of my music come much more from that world. Jeff Buckley also listened a lot to Pakistani singer Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan, hey.”

Melancholy

The fact that many label Tamino as the Flemish Jeff Buckley only bothers him a little. “On the one hand I feel flattered, on the other hand every boy with a guitar who sings high and emotionally is quickly called that. I didn't even know Jeff Buckley's music when friends pointed out the similarity to me. Ever since I listened to a live CD of his at my mother's, I get it. But I sing with the voice I have. I don't want to be the next Jeff Buckley. I think it's okay that people describe my music as 'for fans of Jeff Buckley'.”

Just like the lamented American cult hero - drowned in 1997 and best known for his Leonard Cohen cover Hallelujah - Tamino brings his soulful songs without much frills; sometimes subdued and with a deep crooner voice, then fiercely lashing out with an angelic falsetto. There is a spiritual and melancholic edge to his intriguing songs. “Sincere melancholic music,” Tamino calls it himself.

“Everything I do stems from that melancholic feeling. That's why most of my songs are slow. But I also have uptempo songs, you know. Dynamics in a show is important.”

However, Tamino also turns the Arctic Monkeys hit I Bet You Look Good on the Dancefloor, which he covers for Studio Brussel, into a ballad. “I first wanted to do something by Leonard Cohen, but they thought that was too unknown at Studio Brussels. I'm also a fan of Arctic Monkeys. By playing that song slower, I make it my own.”

“I myself listen to a wide variety of music, from Vashti Bunyan and Thelonious Monk to Nick Cave and Radiohead. And don't forget: dEUS! That's a group I grew up with and look up to. I think it's really cool how Tom Barman and also Mauro (who played his last concert with the group on Friday in the Lotto Arena, ed.) have always done their thing.”

Tamino is proud that he has now found accommodation with Musickness, the management of dEUS and Balthazar, among others. “Compared to three months ago, it feels like I've climbed a step higher,” he muses. “From now on I'm going to be selective with performances. I've performed so many times, sometimes in pubs for ten people. From now on it is important that the setting is right and that people really come for my music. Ticket sales for my concert in the AB-Club in Brussels have just started. There I will present my first mini album on May 16.”

Tamino undeniably has a bright future, but not a dream scenario. “I hope that I can gradually play all over Europe and mean something to a small audience everywhere. Then I would be very satisfied. I may also play with others in the future. I don't always want to keep making music on my own.”

INFO

Concerts as support act for Het Zesde Metaal on 16/02 in Antwerp (De Studio), 10/03 Ghent (Handelsbeurs), 17/03 Hasselt (Muziekodroom). Also 30/04 Ghent (De Vooruit) and 16/05 Brussels (AB, CD presentation).

#tamino #tamino amir #gazet van antwerpen #article #interview #dutch #2017 #without photoshoot #english translated text #photo from vk #wish i had the full article layout but unfortunately this screenshot is all i could find :(

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authenticaffinitysims · 4 months

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Over the course of the next few weeks Rebecah and I (Mission Mouse) will be moving all of our Sims 2 and Sims 4 content to this tumblr account. There is another tumblr account which we are not sure who owns it, but it is definitely not us as far as we have been able to figure out.

I am definitely on a learning curve trying to figure out how this works. The goal is to have 4 sections for uploads. One will be for Rebecah's Sims 4 creations, one will be for Rebecah's Sims 2 creations, while the other two will be for my Sims 4 recolours of furnishings and clothing, and the 4th one will be for my Sims 2 recolours of furnishings and clothing.

I am not a creator per say, I really do just recolour things made by other Simmers. Sadly I have not uploaded anything for quite some time, partly due to health issues and partly due to losing interest. I do have a large number of things I have been slowly working on, just not finished. I did attempt to learn how to mesh, but my old lady brains kept getting mixed up and my results were terrible.

I am going to try and upload our stuff here in the order that they are uploaded at our site. This is going to take a very long time and I ask that you all be patient with me.

A little bit about me----warning--I consider myself to be the most boring old lady you will ever know. That being said, I do have the greatest life. I live with my partner of 30 years and we are blessed enough to own our own home. I am retired and pretty much liking that although I do get a wee bit restless on occasion. I also refer to my partner at times as my husband. Since we live in Canada, after two years a common-law couple is considered a legal couple.

Currently there is just the two of us, although we do share our home with our fur-baby, Jake. We consider him our baby as we have no children so we do call ourselves Jake's mommy and daddy. Jake is a cross between a JackRussel and a Shih Tzu. Use your imagination as to what breed we say he is......not sure I can say that on here! Jake is 14 and is very healthy and active. He does the zoomies almost daily, is obsessed with small tennis balls, and a toy lamb we call LambChop. I think we are on his 10th LambChop. It rains LambChop stuffing in our living room on a regular basis, hence the number of times that toy has had to be replaced. There are probably 10 or 12 tennis balls somewhere in our home, but only 1 can be played with at a time. We can locate these balls usually under our sofa or loveseat and sometimes under our TV stand, but for reasons we do not understand, Jake will decide that the one we recover is not the one he wants to play with. Once we finally get the right one, trust me, craziness ensues.

Dave (my partner) is a truck driver and is 6 years younger than me. I once introduced him to my favourite Aunt as my boy-toy, now that was funny! She got both embarrassed and flustered at the same time. Probably because of her age.....

That's pretty much it for me. Oh, I almost forgot, when Dave talks about me, I am *THE* girlfriend, occasionally *THE* wife but never as *MY* wife or *MY* girlfriend. I am not sure when I will get the promotion or upgrade to *MY* but I can be patient. It has only been 30 years after all.

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brokenmusicboxwolfe · 5 months

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Christmas cards were obviously a bad idea.

I got a late card today, and this was a second one with a gift in it. It’s a gift card for Tractor Supply, so it might just pay for that hog feed I need.

Sounds great, right? Trouble is it’s from someone that hasn’t spoken to me in almost a year. Last year at New Years she called to see how I was doing since she and her husband had helped me out when my power had been out at Christmas. The friendly chat got rather…difficult…when it turned out she was a Trump supporter.

Look, I tried to avoid it. I would have been shocked if someone of her background (white, older, conservative christian, rural) hadn’t been a Trump supporter. But I've lived here all my life, so I long ago learned that people can be nice but still have shocking beliefs. Changing their minds doesn’t work when they don’t trust any information source outside their little world. I have to live with them, so the best way to deal with it is to never let them think you agree when you don’t, but also avoid the trigger topics** when you can. It’s a balancing act, deciding when to fight and when to dodge, but the good thing is there is plenty of solid footing since there is just so much else you can talk about.

Anyway, she pushed, wanting me to agree that poor old Trump is being lied about by the mean old media. I would not. She pushed more. I pleaded with her to drop it, since we weren’t going to agree. She didn’t, partly maybe because she seemed in total shock.

To her the idea that a woman she’d watched grow up, not much younger than her own daughter, and was thought of as “nice” from a family she respected could possibly think differently was incomprehensible. It’s another thing I learned growing up here. People assume that if you are nice, or good, or likable, then you must be like them. They have a baseline view of all that is good, the concept of morality and ethics and such, and that baseline inevitably has been formed on rural conservative christian foundations.

To be fair, this isn’t exclusive to their religious and political views. I have encountered people on the left and of various religious attitudes that all fall into the same trap of going “I like them, so I am sure we are the same”. Some really awful reactions have happened when the reality sinks in that the person they liked disagrees with them strongly.

The woman pushed, and finally I bluntly said exactly what I think of Trump. Profanity may have been involved, something this lady also strongly disapproves of, especially from women.

She quickly, clearly flustered, ended the call.

I haven’t heard from her since, until this card ( that took over a week to go a mile ) showed up.

I have to accept the gift. I have to thank her. I have to make it clear that I am willing to be friendly, but will not be won over to her world view.

**sigh**

I hate phone calls (they always feel out of control, maybe because I’m unable to read body language and faces, but also the thing of “I am making a call and so need to check the number six times and plan a script so my brain doesn’t panic”) , and my attempt to text to avoid talking wouldn’t work (it looked like a smart phone but all texts to her bounce), so now I to write a proper thank you note and buy a stamp.

And I just know she thinks I’m ungrateful for not thanking her already…..

** LOTS of trigger topics if you live in a conservative, southern, rural, bible belt while being an agnostic liberal with a certain international POV and a taste for things decidedly not local. Just mildly suggesting that being stuck living in this town isn’t the greatest has offended people!

#my day #socializing #politics #rural living

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deadcactuswalking · 1 year

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REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 03/06/2023 (J Hus, Taylor Swift, Dua Lipa)

Content warning: Unusually murderous lyrics

Welp, it’s the eighth week on top of the UK Singles Chart for “Miracle” by Calvin Harris and Ellie Goulding... maybe its last? We’ll see but for now, welcome back to yet another episode of REVIEWING THE CHARTS!

Rundown

As always, we start with our notable dropouts although this may be one of those rare weeks where our returning entries are more interesting. Regardless, notable dropouts are songs exiting the UK Top 75 – which is what I cover – after five weeks in the region or a peak in the top 40. Sadly, we see “Mourning” by Post Malone leave the top 40 after only one week in the chart, and honestly most of these dropouts are at least decent. Sure, I’m not complaining about “Calendar” by Nines, but we also say farewell to “Healing” by Tion Wayne, “Energy” by Digga D and “B.O.T.A. (Baddest of Them All)”... as well as “Mr. Brightside” because of course but probably most unfortunately, “ceilings” by Lizzy McAlpine. It had a good run, and if I end up making a year-end list, it would end up pretty high to say the least.

We also see the three-song rule in action, which is partly why I mentioned our returning entries, as both Taylor Swift and Lewis Capaldi switch out their Pokémon. Capaldi exchanges “How I’m Feeling Now” for “Forget Me” (back at #62) which is the more rote exchange compared to Taylor, who lets “Anti-Hero” drop out of the chart – finally – thanks to the new reissue for Midnights, which has allowed “Snow on the Beach” featuring Lana Del Rey to re-enter at #24 due to a superior version that includes more vocals from Lana since fans were clamouring for it. More on Taylor later.

For now, there are three more returns and whilst I can’t say I was ever a big fan of Tina Turner, both her legendary presence and comeback in the 1980s as well as her heartbreaking story that makes her out like a badass who survived a ton of abuse from her ex-husband and lived life to the fullest for the years afterwards, was impossible to ignore, and still is. She did live a long life, but I can’t help but think that the Queen of Rock and Roll still never got her due flowers when alive, and I honestly include myself in that – why I haven’t dug into her albums is beyond me. Sadly, Tina never topped the chart here in the UK, peaking at #3 a fitting three times. Only one of those songs, the US chart-topper “What’s Love Got to Do with It” from 1984, returns this week at #35. A 2020 Kygo remix of said song was her latest chart hit, peaking at #31. Weirdly enough, Warren G and Adina Howard actually took the song further to #2 with their 1996 cover, which is bizarre to think about. Her 1993 cover of Creedence Clearwater Revival’s “Proud Mary” is back at #44, with this solo version actually reaching a new peak since it only got to #62 prior in 2010 thanks to an X Factor performance. The original CCR track hit #8 and the version Tina recorded with Ike never charted in the UK. Finally, at #25, we have “The Best”, probably tied with “What’s Love Got to Do with It” as her best known song. I imagine this charted higher because 1.) it’s the name of her greatest hits album, and 2.) it has a really triumphant, celebration of life feeling to it. The song is actually a cover of a Bonnie Tyler song but her version went nowhere whilst “The Best” was a global hit when performed by Tina Turner, so she definitely owns this song in the cultural understanding. Her version peaked at #5 in the UK, 90 spots higher than Tyler’s, and actually returned to #9 in, once again, 2010. I don’t think all these numbers effectively represent the impact of Tina Turner, and I’m far from the best person to relay what she and her songs meant to millions of people, but still, rest in power.

When it comes to the rest of our gains, well, we see boosts for “Little Things” by Jorja Smith at #45, “Satellite” and “Late Night Talking” by Harry Styles at #36 and #31 respectively, and that’s pretty much it aside from Taylor’s already mediocre “Karma” suffering from its frankly terrible Ice Spice remix, surging all the way up to #12. We’ll see if it sticks around, but I have my doubts.

As for the top five on this week’s UK Singles Chart, it’s looking pretty standard – we have “REACT” by Switch Disco and Ella Henderson featuring the late Robert Miles at #5 – not complaining about that one gaining – followed by “As it Was” by Harry Styles, and “Calm Down” by Rema both taking their sweet time at #4 and #3. And of course, we have “Daylight” by David Kushner at #2 and “Miracle” at the very top, so now it’s time to run through this week’s newest chart entries.

NEW ARRIVALS

#75 – “Pelle Coat” – Lil Durk

Produced by Chopsquad DJ

I did not listen to Almost Healed. I probably should have but whilst I do quite like Lil Durk a lot of the time, when I see production from Dr. Luke and features from Kodak Black, Morgan Wallen and the late Juice WRLD, a lot of my interest flies out of the window, especially since “All My Life” continues to sour on me outside of Durk’s contribution. Thankfully, we didn’t get any of that malarkey as thanks to a video, a solo Durk track consisting of mostly observational story-telling is what charted from his album, which peaked at #14 on the albums chart this week. I love how the more intimate 90s R&B keys play off the looming pianos, fitting for how gang violence and paranoia is meshed with trying to live an average, everyday life and forming personal relationships with people you love and then see die, with Chopsquad DJ really delivering what is pretty much a perfect beat for Durk, so it’s no surprise that he kills it, without a hook and instead just a creeping refrain – “they’re scared to come outside”. Durk keeps his wonky, fast-paced melodic flow as he recalls events from his life for four minutes, with these specific stories ending up becoming trends and routines, to the point where his aunt can’t even trust him after he saw his cousin die right in front of him, which is just a small part of the second verse but was what resonated with me. It gets to an interesting question – at what point is family still family? – but seemingly understands his aunt’s visceral reaction, since Hell, he has at least 12 visceral, distrusting gut reactions to tragedies in his life in this very song. He ends the song with a duality: Durk knows what he’s done in his life, and isn’t scared to face them... but he also asks Allah if he can forgive him for the sake of his family. How I’d describe the last couple bars, droned on with melodious Auto-Tune, would be helpless and lacking control. In fact, he loses control of the narrative throughout the song, intentionally or not, as his bars get longer, more specific and more wrapped up in context, whilst his flow gets sloppier and less melodic until the last couple lines, where he feels like he needs divine intervention just to know that he can be closer with his own children and make sure his friends aren’t dying. It’s a pretty devastating opener too, considering the first track is just Alicia Keys initiating the therapy session and “Pelle Coat” is how he ends up venting to her. It may not be for everyone, but it’s a pretty vulnerable track from Durk that I’m sad has to exist.

#67 – “Talibans” – Byron Messia

Produced by Kelly Beatz

Ah, the Taliban. My favourite Islamist fundamentalist organisation currently in control of most of Afghanistan. This is actually nothing new for the record – in Lil Yachty’s “Oprah’s Bank Account” with DaBaby, which peaked at #54, Drake compares himself to Osama bin Laden AND Barack Obama, and Future continuously mentions the Taliban in reference to his gang, as do many other rappers. Hell, Drake seems to have the Taliban follow him everywhere – he was on “Life is Good” with Future that peaked at #3 and that had Osama show up in the lyrics too. Hell, it had DaBaby on the remix also, and both songs were released in 2020. I may have inadvertently discovered the weirdest trend in pop music in the last five years. Moving on, Byron Messia is a bubbling artist born in Jamaica and apparently from St. Kitts and Nevis, with this being his breakout hit... and it’s completely serviceable dancehall. The bed of vocal samples that acts as a melody amidst the fizzy bass and tropical drums doesn’t really serve much of a foundation: it feels really minimal, and the fact that Messia goes for an Auto-Tune croon instead of a more threatening delivery just makes this feel pretty dissonant. The creeping violence in the pre-chorus – where he says that the brain will be shot so far it ends up in Canada which, unless something’s lost in the language barrier, is pretty funny – does not mix with this cloudy dancehall pop at all, and it really wouldn’t bother me if he were more interesting in his delivery or if there was anything to this production, and no, repeating the chorus with ridiculous vibrato inflections as the outro is not “interesting”. I guess it’s completely fine but I definitely won’t be returning to this.

#63 – “Good Love” – Hannah Laing and RoRo

Produced by Hannah Laing and James Hurr

Alright, I’ll bite: who the Hell are any of these people? So Hannah Laing is a Scottish DJ from Dundee who’s been doing mixes and bootlegs for quite a while now, and has some connections in the Ibiza circuit, as well as podcasts, club nights and a recent documentary. James Hurr is a London producer, and RoRo is an R&B singer from Barbados. This track, topped with a very Scottish cover art, is a club banger based on RoRo’s pitch-shifted vocals about love and freedom, and I’ll say – great choice for a hook, Hannah, if this is a remix, and great idea, RoRo, if it isn’t – “give me permission to lose my head” is a banger line to put at the end of your refrain for a hardcore track. The breakbeats waiver off of the warped bass before clashing into a muted yet alarming synth kick keeping everything just tight enough for an explosion to eventually come around the corner, and then... well, it doesn’t happen immediately. We get a festival-ready moment of tension that sticks for way longer than I assumed it would, chopping up RoRo’s vocals into an entirely new hook, as the breakbeats ramp up in intensity amidst all the reverb and filters, only for it to tighten right back up again. If I’m honest, I do feel kind of cheaped out of a good climax here, and I’m kind of underwhelmed by the “drop” if you can call it that – it feels more like just returning to the song as usual, with not much changed in terms of melodies or synth layering, and especially not production, to make it feel all that worth it. Maybe an extended mix would help me enjoy this since it brings the potential for more build-up and more punch, and I have no doubt this would go hard thrown in a DJ mix, but I feel like it’s not quite there for me yet, which is a shame since this sound usually clicks with me immediately. There’s a great foundation here, with good ideas, but it just doesn’t hit like I want it to.

#20 – “Dance the Night” (From Barbie the Album) – Dua Lipa

Produced by Mark Ronson, Picard Brothers and Andrew Wyatt

I could not care less for the Barbie movie, but a star-studded soundtrack with Mark Ronson at the helm sounds like more my speed, especially if it’s going to go all-out with the camp style of the brand. I do feel Ronson could potentially fumble this by wanting to make it feel cool, which really shouldn’t be happening when one of the songs is a cover of Aqua’s “Barbie Girl” with Nicki Minaj and Ice Spice... but I’ll definitely be listening to it when it comes out to hear if Ronson spares his dignity on this record, which he really shouldn’t when considering what he’s actually making the soundtrack for. This Dua Lipa single is the lead-off for the Barbie moment of the Summer, and... yeah, this sure sounds like a Future Nostalgia song. Given “We’re Good” and “Sweetest Pie”, I wasn’t really excited for whatever Dua was seemingly going to put out sound-wise but at least it was a bit different to what we’d already heard her try and succeed with flying colours at. This just feels like Ronson re-sparking the magic of that last Dua album and I mean, you can’t really fail with that? The strings are immense, the claps are alive, and Dua’s ad-libs and harmonies feel perfectly orchestrated alongside the groove, which is something Mark Ronson has always been great at. Something else he’s great at is making something that means completely nothing sound as cinematic as possible – and given this song is just about, well, dancing and fun and some PG romance, the strings and twinkling keys do a lot of heavy lifting in making this feel like well, anything, yet it still just kind of feels muddy. The mix is dynamic, sure, but the groove is unchanging apart from the Disney pre-chorus, which we don’t always get, and whilst I love the harmonies and vocal riffing Dua engages in here, it feels like it’s covering up a melodically void chorus, one that’s not as catchy and honestly too covered in sprinkles to really work for me. I know, I know, I said I didn’t want him to spare his dignity, but I feel like he fell into that exact trap I was suspecting – Dua doesn’t get any funny lines or inflections, the song feels orchestrated which is a gift and a curse, and the songwriting is kind of rote. With this Barbie album, I want less serviceable pop music and more sacrifices – it would probably fit with the movie and brand more than he thinks it does. Alas, this is still a decent song, just not one that really elevates to a higher level like much of Future Nostalgia did. There’s some life missing here.

#18 – “Hits Different” – Taylor Swift

Produced by Taylor Swift, Aaron Dessner and Jack Antonoff

This originally Target-exclusive track from Midnights was naturally a fan favourite to be added onto streaming and with the newest reissue, this was one of the three tracks added – the other two were alternate versions previously mentioned in this episode. I’m sure for Swifties this was worth the wait but I don’t like this at all. “Hits Different” is about a vivid breakup that’s just so much more impactful than the others because of how the relationship felt. We’ve got an acoustic guitar pickup that really could find better use in some indie rock, that gets muddied with some gross-sounding percussion that hits in full force in a chorus alongside Antonoff’s buzzy synths and a really awkward cadence from Taylor that feels a bit outside of what she wants to do? I don’t know, pretty much all of the melodies here feel like reaches for Taylor’s voice and inflections, especially with harmonies that get kind of messy, and whilst that very much could be the intention for a song about a “catastrophic” breakup, it doesn’t really hit that this means all that much as she claims it to. Sure, it’s in the writing, but by the time we get to Taylor’s borderline yelling and rapping in the bridge, I’m confused to why this isn’t in full mourning mode. If it’s not easy to move on, why is the song so breezy and flowery in how she sloppily moves through overwritten lines? That third verse also feels kind of tacked on and unnecessarily dissonant for a song that just ends up continuing as if nothing’s changed. I suppose it’s a fine pop song, but it feels like the fundamentals aren’t there so they just pumped it with nicely-produced Jack Antonoff Juice to make it sound realised. Even when charting in the top 20, this is still a bonus track and honestly for good reason.

#15 – “It’s Crazy” – J Hus

Produced by Fumes Beats

And finally, we end the episode with the comeback of J Hus and... man, this is devilish. The beat from Fumes Beats is pretty standard drill with a particularly menacing acoustic guitar, oddly infectious vocal loops and a hard-hitting 808, but Hus is really the main story here, and he’s completely unhinged in borderline sadistic violence, with a flow that is basically Ol’ Dirty Bastard levels of just barely staying on beat yet still piquing your interest with menace and madness. The comic antagonism gets to really interesting places, especially when he basically just starts talking, criticising people for wanting to see him as a villain when he’s living his life peacefully before immediately back-tracking and saying he’s been feeling evil recently – but not recently, just forever. There’s a rasp and grit to his voice here, but it’s not overwhelming or fully aggressive, making it feel even more out-there and honestly damn near creepy, with a great rhyme scheme in the first verse making up for the purposefully awkward silences. The first verse starts with psychological torture and the second starts with just straight-up sadistic torture, with a build-up of eerie Halloween synths that really makes this feel as evil as possible. It’s not surprising he compares himself to the Joker, but calling himself the “father” of pain and trauma goes unnecessarily hard, and he even admits to murder giving him a boner. There’s a soaring screech of strings that just barely intercepts the bass in the second half of the second verse and, no pun intended, it is killer, and leads very well back into the chorus, if you can call it that. I didn’t really expect the highest debut this week to be as murderous as this, but as someone who likes their hardcore rap particularly unhinged, I’m surprised to see this as a lead single, but definitely not complaining. This is insane.

Conclusion

I feel like I need to give J Hus Best of the Week for “It’s Crazy” since I’m pretty sure if I don’t, I won’t see another chart, but it’s not like he doesn’t deserve it, with the very close Honourable Mention going to Lil Durk for “Pelle Coat”. Good week for paranoid murder raps, I guess. As for the rest, it really wasn’t a standout week in either extreme, but I think I’m giving Worst of the Week to Taylor Swift for “Hits Different” with a Dishonourable Mention to “Talibans” by Byron Messia, just for being pretty boring. For what’s on the horizon, I think we can expect an overthrow at the very top, but elsewhere, I guess we’ll find out. Thanks for reading, and I’ll see you next week!

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novoplata · 2 years

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Your life starts now - Part 2.

“Mengucap syukur Bogor kota hujan, kalau ngga siapa yang mau menyiram Kebun Raya, coba?” says my Aunt Cony’s Facebook status last Friday. She was being as positive as ever and I didn’t even bother to ‘like’ her status.

On Sunday afternoon, I received a message from Aunt Poppy asking me to pray for Aunt Cony. She had a stroke the day before and was then in a coma. She passed away peacefully the next day surrounded by family members and her students (Aunt Cony was a teacher). I, on the other hand, wasn’t able to make it to the funeral as this side of my family lives in Indonesia.

I couldn’t help but cry with gratitude and pride when I read the multitude of posts from her students on her Facebook wall. Many deemed her as 'the best teacher ever’ and said that she’s touched their lives in many ways than one. Although I never got a chance to get to know her closely, I’m glad that she’s lived her life so prolifically for others.

Her sudden passing makes me realise the frailty of life. One day you’re posting clever Facebook statuses, and the next day you’re in a coma. It makes me realise that one must always live her life with a sense of urgency, as life is indeed too short.

It reminds me of the importance of making each day count by never passing an opportunity to do a good deed for someone else. While you still can, teach what you know, encourage with kind words and give what you can afford. Since life is fleeting, never wait until the next day to tell someone you love them, 'like’ their Facebook statuses or even say hi - you never know when you won’t get a chance to.

Don’t wait till tomorrow for your life to start. (Taken from a blog post in November 2012) Kedekut. I have an unhealthy, all-or-nothing relationship with money. I had spent my 20s squandering my paycheck because I didn't think that money is worth saving unless you're saving up a lot. Needless to say, I didn't start saving money until I was 30, partly because my then-boyfriend was jobless and I was saving up for our wedding (which, thankfully didn't happen). When I finally hit my target savings number last year in August, I told myself that anything extra I had after that is going to my 'treats' or 'vacation' fund. However, once I did save some more, I was starting to feel like a treat for myself was somewhat undeserved, especially in this current economical climate. If anything, I felt like I should continue saving up and not even think of enjoying the fruits of my labour until when times are better. But when exactly will times be better? I remember having a conversation with my dad back in 2017 when I got adventurous and bought flight tickets to travel every other month that year. He had warned me that times are bad and that I shouldn't be careless with my money. Did I worry? Yes, I did. But in hindsight, I'm glad that I did all the travelling I could then before the pandemic hit and before the economy worsened aka today. Chances are things are not going to get better for a while and I have no way of knowing whether I'd live to see better days anyway. So, when I still have the means and strength to enjoy the fruits of my labour, I should, by all means, do it! Things are getting scarily expensive with global inflation. But chances are it's only going to be more expensive five years in the future. By that time, while I may have accumulated more savings, I may not have the strength and vigour I have today to do what I enjoy. I'm making next year a 'treat Nova' year (I'll start warming up this year with a mini staycation in Labuan for my birthday, haha!). Hopefully, Iceland will happen then, and then some! YOLO!

#YOLO

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sunwoo-hoo · 3 years

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↣ treasure reaction to s/o bringing niece/nephew to the dorms

↳ a/n: hello lovelies! here is another treasure reaction! i’m sorry that it took so long, treasure usually takes me a little longer to do so keep that in mind for future requests. but anyway i hope you like it! i got inspiration from t-map episode 39. i hope you don’t mind i made the kids various ages so that it wasn’t the same scenario. xx

(also this was reuploaded since it wasn’t showing up in my tags)

↳ requested? yes

↳ genre: fluffiest of fluff

↳ send in your request here

↳ word count: 1.5k

↳ treasure x fem reader

「 choi hyunsuk 」

you told him you had to cancel the date you had planned together to watch your 5 year old niece

he recommended bringing her over to the dorms so that you could watch her together

he was ecstatic when you showed up with the little girl’s hand in yours

“oh my goodness aren’t you so cute?!” he gushed squatting down to get on her eye level

she hid her behind your legs in embarrassment

the day was spent playing various games like hide and seek easing your niece into the unfamiliar surroundings

at one point when she settled down watching television hyunsuk couldn’t help but look at you saying

“i can’t wait til we have a child of our own one day”

「 park jihoon 」

you had brought your nephew over to bake some brownies together hoping to surprise jihoon after practice

but when he told you practice was cancelled for the day he decided to join in on baking

he tried his best to make your 6 year old nephew laugh but he was not having it

it wasn’t until jihoon accidentally tripped over some flour falling to the floor butt first is when your nephew started to laugh uncontrollably

you couldn’t help but put your hand over your mouth trying not to laugh in front of him

“i’m glad you think my misery is funny” he quipped rubbing his behind

「 kanemoto yoshinori 」

it was a rainy day when you went to visit yoshi at the dorms with your young niece

she had just turned 4 and yoshi wanted to meet her finally coming back from treasure’s recent comeback

walking into the dorms he had the biggest smile on his face when he bend down to greet her

“hello! [niece name] it’s so nice to meet you, you can call me yoshi-oppa” grabbing her little hand

she smiled up at him looking enjoying the new acquaintance she had just met

yoshi then stood back up placing a kiss on your cheek

“she’s so adorable”

「 kim junkyu 」

you were your nephew’s best friend being the cool aunt he always loved hanging out with you

when he heard you were in a relationship with an idol he was a tad bit jealous since he knew he would be seeing less of you

until you decided that your nephew should meet junkyu bringing him to the dorms one afternoon

when you walked in junkyu couldn’t help but smile at your nephew’s cuteness

“you must be [nephew name] i’m your aunt’s special friend” he exclaimed proudly

junkyu decided to show off his singing charms to your nephew who couldn’t help but be in awe of his voice

the rest of the day was spent together singing karaoke

「 takata mashiho 」

this wasn’t the first time mashiho had met your 7 year old nephew

in fact you were convinced your nephew liked mashiho more than you when he basically begged you to take him to see mashiho one day

walking in the dorms mashiho ran up to your nephew giving him the biggest of hugs

“hey! [nephew name] i’ve missed you! guess what? i got the nintendo switch all set up for us” he cheered

your nephew practically ran at a inhuman speed to the console mashiho going after him

you couldn’t help but smile looking at your two favorite people in the world having a wonderful time together

「 yoon jaehyuk 」

it was busy afternoon running errands with your young niece

jaehyuk had texted you asking you to come over

when you told him that you had your young niece with you that’s when he texted back in less than in a minute

telling you that he would babysit her until you were finishing up your errands for the day

when you went to the dorms you were shocked on what he had set up there was different types of games, books, & snacks

when he greeted you with a peck on the lips you couldn’t help but smile at the effort he put in

“don’t worry about a thing [name] we’re going to have lots of fun i promise” he grinned

「 hamada asahi 」

it all happend during a snow day, you were taking care of your niece while your sibling was out of town for a business trip

deciding to get out of the house you told asahi you were coming over to the dorms since it was treasure’s break

he decided to draw out a welcome sign for her so that she would be surprised when you showed up

walking in the dorm shaking your shoulders trying to get rid of snow that’s when you saw the welcome sign

your niece smiled at the cute drawn characters as asahi bend down to give her the piece of paper

“this is for you [niece name] i hope you like it” he smiled

the rest of the day was spent by the fire enjoying hot chocolate with marshmallows

「 bang yedam 」

when yedam told you he wanted to meet your nephew you were kind of against it

partly because your nephew was still very young barely able to walk on his own but yedam persisted

giving in you brought your nephew to the dorms one day

walking in yedam ran straight towards you in awe of the young child in your arms

“he’s so charming” he gushed squishing his little cheeks

as you walked into the living your room you sat down on the couch putting your nephew on the floor so that he could crawl around

he then crawled to yedam’s guitar playing with the strings laughing at the funny noise it was making

picking up the guitar yedam exclaimed proudly

“how about i sing a song for you? would you like that?”

「 kim doyoung 」

you were picking up your 5 year old nephew from school wanting to see doyoung since his dorms was on the way back home

he was surprised to see you but even more surprised when you brought your nephew as well

since it was a beautiful day out you all decided to go to the small park behind the dorms

all three of you decided to play a game of soccer while doyoung was giving your nephew some pointers

“your doing great! [nephew name] but try it this way”

you smiled at the wholesome interaction while your nephew looked up at him in admiration

doyoung gave him the biggest cheer when your newphew made his first goal

“see! i knew you could do it” he exclaimed proudly showing off his cute smile that you loved so much

「 watanabe haruto 」

one of the most important things to haruto was family

so when your sibling finally had your first niece he was thrilled not only for you but for your sibling as well

after a couple of weeks you finally decided to bring her to meet haruto while he was at the dorms

walking in with the baby in your arms he looked down at her tearing up

he couldn’t help it, as it reminded him of his little sister back home all the way in japan

when you gently passed her over to haruto he smiled

looking up at him you wiped away his tears as he finally said

“i think it’s time you meet my family [name] your important to me.. i want them to meet the woman i want to spend the rest of my life with” he vowed

「 park jeongwoo 」

it was a rare day when jeongwoo had a day off from all of his idol duties

so you were shocked when he said he wanted it to spend his day off with you and your niece

the minute you showed up to the dorms your niece went wild running all over the place

she was still at the age where she was just full of energy and there was no way you could stop it anytime soon

jeongwoo ran after her trying to catch her

“come here baby!” he giggled making funny animal noises trying to get her attention

finally scooping her up he gave her a small kiss on the cheek

you pouted until he saw your face giving you a small kiss on your pouty lips

“don’t worry babe your still my number 1 but [niece name] is coming for your spot” he teased as you lightly punched his arm playfully

「 so junghwan 」

being the youngest of the group he was the most comfortable around young children

you decided that he should meet your niece for the first time after a couple of months of dating

one sunny day coming to the dorms he noticed you walking in with her as he was playing a video game

he shyly walked over to her bending down to her eye level

“hello, [niece name] you look very pretty today, it’s so nice to meet you” he announced looking at her pink tutu and her small tiara

she giggled pulling off her tiara giving it to junghwan

he put it on top of his head confidently

“do i look like a prince?” he asked doing a pose

she shyly nodded

the rest of the day was spent playing dress up and having tea time together

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* © sunwoo-hoo 2 0 2 1 ✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

#treasure reactions #treasure scenarios #treasure imagines #treasure x reader #hyunsuk x reader #jihoon x reader #yoshi x reader #junkyu x reader #mashiho x reader #jaehyuk x reader #asahi x reader #yedam x reader #doyoung x reader #haruto x reader #jeongwoo x reader #junghwan x reader #[mine 🌸]#yg treasure #treasure

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bananaofswifts · 3 years

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Taylor Swift Turns on a Facsimile Machine for the Ingenious Recreations of ‘Fearless (Taylor’s Version)’: Album Review

Swift recreates her entire 2008 album literally down to the last note, then gives herself room for stylistic latitude on six never-before-recorded "vault" tracks.

By Chris Willman

Swift recreates her entire 2008 album literally down to the last note, then gives herself room for stylistic latitude on six never-before-recorded "vault" tracks.

There is no “best actress” award at the Grammys, perhaps for obvious reasons, but maybe there should be this coming year. And the Grammy would go to… Taylor Swift, for so persuasively playing her 18-year-old self in “Fearless (Taylor’s Version),” her beyond-meticulous recreation of the 2008 recording that did win her her first album of the year trophy back in the day. It’s impossible to overstate just how thoroughly the new version is intended as an exact replica of the old — all the way down to her startling ability to recapture an untrained teen singing voice she’s long matured and moved on from. It’s a stunt, to be sure, but a stunt for the ages — mastering the guile it takes to go back to sounding this guileless.

There are two different, very solid reasons to pick up or stream “Taylor’s Version,” regardless of whether you share her ire for the Big Machine label, whose loose ways with her nine-figure catalog precipitated this, the first in a six-album series of remakes where she’ll be turning on the facsimile machine. One is to marvel at her gift for self-mimicry on the album’s original tracks, where she sounds as possessed by her younger self as Regan ever was by Pazuzu. The other reason is, of course, to check out the six “vault” numbers that Swift wrote during that time frame but has never released before in any form, which dispenses with stylistic fealty to the late 2000s and frames her “Fearless”-era discards in production and arrangements closer to “Folklore.” Those half-dozen (kind of) new tracks really do sound like modern Taylor Swift covering her old stuff.

But those original lucky 13? It’s the same damn record… which is kind of hilarious and marvelous and the kind of meta-ness that will inspire a thousand more think-pieces than it already has, along with possibly efforts at forensic analysis to figure out how she did it.

It would not be surprising if, as we speak, Big Machine was putting a combined team of scientists and lawyers on the case of the new album’s waveform readouts, to make sure it’s not just the original album, remixed. Honestly, it’s that close. The timings of the songs are all within a few seconds of the original tracks, if not coming in at exactly the same length. The duplication effort doesn’t allow any detours. If “Forever and Always” had a cold open then, it’s going to have a cold open now. If the 2008 “That’s the Way I Love You” had slamming rock guitars with an almost subliminal banjo being plucked beneath the racket, so will the 2021 “That’s the Way I Loved You.” A drum roll to end the old “Change”? A drum roll to end its body-snatcher doppelganger. And if she chuckled before the final chorus of “Hey Stephen” 13 years ago, so will that moment be cause for a delighted giggle now.

Of course, much analysis will be put into whether the new laugh is a more knowing-sounding laugh. And that will be part of the fun for a certain segment of audiophile Swifties who will go looking for the slightest change as evidence of something meaningful. When “Love Story (Taylor’s Version)” first came out weeks back to preview the album, there were reviews written that swore she’d subtly changed up her phrasing to put a contemporary spin on the song. And maybe they were right, but, having done a fair amount of A/B testing of the two versions of the album, I found myself feeling like I do when vinyl buffs insist there are significant sonic differences between the first stamper version of an LP and one that was pressed a year later. If you can spot those very, very, very modest tweaks, go for it.

But my suspicion is that if Swift has decided to turn a phrase a little differently here or there on this album, or done anything too differently aside from brighten the sound, she’s doing it more as an Easter egg, for the people who are on that kind of hunt, than anything really designed as reinterpretation. Because the last thing Swift wants most of her fans doing is A/B-ing the two versions, the way I did. The whole point is to have folks retire the OG “Fearless” from their Spotify playlists, right? The Swift faithful were already threatening to rain down damnation on anyone caught sneaking an audio peek at the old version after midnight. What she intended was to come up with a rendering so faithful that you would never have a need to spin the vintage album again. In that, she has succeeded beyond what could have been imagined even in the dreams of the few self-forgers who’ve tried this before, like a Jeff Lynne.

Is there any reason to find value in the new versions if you couldn’t care less about the issues of masters and contracts and respect in business deals that made all this strangely possible? Yes, with the first one being that the new album just sounds like a terrific remastering of the old — the same notes, and you’d swear the same performances, but sounding brighter and punchier just on a surface level. But on a more philosophical one, it’s not just a case of Swift playing with her back catalog like Andy Warhol played with his soup can. It’s really a triumph of self-knowledge and self-awareness, in the way that Swift is so hyper-conscious of the ways she’s matured that she has the ability to un-mature before our very ears. With her vocals, it’s virtuosic, in a way, how she’s made herself return to her unvirtuosic upstart self.

On Swift’s earliest albums and in those seminal live shows — at the time when she was famously being told she “can’t sing,” to quote a song from the follow-up album — there was a slight shrillness around the edges of her voice that, if you lacked faith, you might’ve imaged would be there forever. It wasn’t. That was partly youth, and partly just the sheer earnestness with which she wanted to convey the honesty of the songs. She’s advanced so much since then — into one of pop’s most gifted modern singers, really — that the woman of “Folklore” and “Evermore” seems like a completely different human being than the one who made the self-titled debut and “Fearless,” never mind just a woman versus girl. It wouldn’t have seemed possible that she could go back to her old way of singing at the accomplished age of 31, but she found and recreated that nervous, sincere, pleading voice of yesteryear. And maybe it was just a technical feat, of temporarily unlearning what she’s learned since then, but you can sense that maybe she had to go there internally, too, to the place where she was counseling other girls to guard their sexual virtue in “Fifteen,” or wondering whether to believe the fairy tale of “Love Story” or the wakeup call of “White Horse,” or proving with “Forever & Always” that writing a song telling off Joe Jonas for his 27-second breakup call was better than revenge.

If at first you’re not inclined to notice that Swift has re-adopted a completely different singing voice for the “Fearless” remakes, the realization may kick in when those “vault” tracks start appearing in the later stretch of this hour-and-50-minute album. The writing on the six songs that have been pulled up from the 2008 cutting room floor seems primitive, even a little bit by the standards of the “Fearless” album; there are great lines and couplets throughout the rescued tracks, but you can see why she left them as works-in-progress. But she doesn’t use her youthful voice on these resurrections, nor does she employ the actual style of “Fearless” very strictly. Of course, she feels more freedom on these, because there are no predecessors in the Big Machine catalog she’s asking you to leave behind. Her current collaborators of choice, Jack Antonoff and Aaron Dessner, divided the co-producing work on these fresher songs, as they did for the two all-new albums she released in the last year. (The “Fearless” recreations are co-produced by Swift with Christopher Rowe, someone who worked on remixes for Swift back in that era.) They co-produce the vault songs in a style that sounds somewhere between “Fearless” and Folklore”… a more spectral brand of country-pop, with flutes and synths and ringing 12-string guitars and a modicum of drum programming replacing some (but not all) of the acoustic stringed instruments you’d expect to be carried over from “Fearless” proper.

Of the previously unheard tracks, Swift was right — she’s always been her own best self-editor — in putting out “You All Over Me” first, in advance of the album. With its imagery of half-muddy stones being upturned on the road, this song has advanced lyrical conceits more of a piece with the level of writing she’s doing now than some of the slightly less precocious songs that follow. Still, there’s something to be said for the sheer zippiness with which Swift conveys teen heartbreak in “Mr. Perfectly Fine,” which has a lyric that shows Swift had long since absorbed the lessons Nashville had to offer about how to come up with a high-concept song — the concept, in this case, being just to stick the word “mister” in front of a lot of phrases relating to her shallow ex, as if they were honorary titles to be conferred for being a shit, while she employs the “miss” for herself more sparingly.

Some of the remaining outtake songs go back more toward the sedate side of “Fearless”-style material; she didn’t leave any real bangers in the can. “We Were Happy,” the first of two successive tracks to bring in Keith Urban (but only for backgrounds on this one), employs fake strings and real cello as Swift waxes nostalgic for a time when “you threw your arms around my neck, back when I deserved it.” It’s funny, in a good way, to hear Swift at 31 recreating a song she wrote at 17 or 18 that pined for long-past better times. The next song, “That’s When,” brings Urban in for a proper duet where he gets a whole second verse and featured status on half a chorus, and it’s lovely to hear them together. But, as a make-up song, it doesn’t feel as real or lived-in as the more personal things she was writing at the time — and the fact that its chords are pretty close to a slightly more balladic version of the superior “You Belong With Me” was probably a pretty good reason for dropping it at the time.

the 18-year-old Taylor Swift is a great place to visit, but “Folklore” and “Evermore” are the place you’ll want to return to and live, unless you have an especially strong sentimental attachment to “Fearless”… which, sure, half of young America does. It’s not irreconcilable to say that the two albums she issued in the last year represent a daring pinnacle of her career, but that “Fearless” deserved to win album of the year in 2008. Has there been a greater pop single in the 20th century than “You Belong With Me”? Probably not. Did the album also have lesser moments you probably haven’t thought about in a while, like the just-okay “Breathe”? Yes. (I looked up to see whether Swift had ever played that little remarked upon number in concert, and according to setlists.fm, she did, exactly once… in 2018. Because she’s Taylor Swift, and of course she did.) It’s not certain that her duet with Colbie Caillat really needed to be resurrected, except it’s fun, because hey, she even roped former duet partners back into her time warp. But there are so many number that have stood the test of time, like “The Way I Love You,” an early song that really got at the complicated feelings about passion and fidelity that she would come to explore more as she grew into her 20s… and just kind of a headbanger, too, on an album that does love its fiddles and mandolins.

It doesn’t take much to wonder why Swift put up “Fearless” first in this six-album exercise; it’s one of her two biggest albums, along with “1989,” and it’s 13 years old, which does mean something superstitious in the Taylor-verse. In a way, it’ll be more interesting to see what happens when she gets to more complicated productions, like “1989” or “Reputation.” But maybe “Fearless” did present the opportunity for the grandest experiment out of the gate: to recreate something that pure and heartfelt, with all the meticulousness a studio master like Swift can put to that process now, without having it seem like she’s faking sincerity. Let the think-pieces proceed — because this is about six hundred different shades of meta. But, all craftiness and calculation aside, there’s a sweetness to the regression that’s not inconsequential. It harks back to a time when she only wondered if she could be fearless, before she learned it the harder way for sure. What they say about actors “disappearing into the role”? That really applies to Taylor Swift, playing herself.

#taylor swift #fearless #review

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demonslayedher · 3 years

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The Sharing of Demon Cells

Kibutsuji Muzan is the basis upon which all other demons live. They were altered by his cells, having more of his cells makes them more powerful, he can reach into their thoughts and sight whenever he likes, and should they ever slip up and say something that will pose a threat to him, the cells of his that each demon carries will act as a curse and kill them. But each demon is also an individual, and their own cells determine what sort of being they'll become, and how useful they'll be to Muzan in doing what he cannot. To what extent can their own cells be shared and influence others, a reflection of the way Muzan's can be? This will be heavily based on info presented in Fanbook #2, but will also look at cases throughout the manga.

Influence of Muzan's Cells First, let's consider how unique or separate the demons are in the first place. All demons have Muzan's cells, except Yushiro who was created without them, and when Muzan was killed all the demons died too. This dependency, as well as the fact that each demon essentially acts as a long-distance extension of Muzan, might make it seem like they are a hivemind, or like an aspen forest, in which it looks like there are lots of trees but actually they are all one living entity connected by their roots. However, I think it's better to think of Muzan like one core tree, and the other demons like plants that growth on top on him with roots dependent on him, though they use their own leaves to reap... well, sunlight. Maybe this is a bad metaphor. We can still, however, thing of them as intimately intertwined.

Essentially, they are their own unique beings almost like parasites to him, because in most cases we've seen of people turning to demons, there was more or less a death of the human. In the two cases of demons turning human again, with the help of medicine to unweave themselves from Muzan, the mere time spent as a demon which self-repairing cells was what already zapped life back into them. In other cases, while still intimating interwoven with Muzan, that means they'd have been dragging down with him. This means Nezuko got very lucky with her timing that the medicine had an effect on her before Muzan perished; though perhaps she freed herself enough that this would not have had an effect. For those demons that aren't as lucky (Tamayo had a pure stroke of luck being able to break from, as though the thorny vines turned brittle enough for her to break through when Muzan was in pieces after encountering Yoriichi, and then it was impossible to bring her back), this means being vulnerable to Muzan's wishes at any time. While Muzan himself is essentially in pieces at all times, what with being present inside of each of his demons, he is the progenitor of demons, and this doesn't cause him any ill effects (making him more like a host rather than interdependent). However, other demons have also shown this ability to break themselves into multiple pieces.

The Swamp Demon: One demon in three bodies showing different attributes, but all the same being. Notably, this was not it's only Blood Technique, it had also developed a whole sub-dimension. Pretty rough first mission for a newbie, although it's possible it did not yet have mastery of its own rather impressive techniques (like Kaigaku). Hantengu: His self-splitting is more complicated, in that he first gains strength when he is cut, especially in taking on younger forms, until reaching the limits of this. Make enough copies, and his copies will no longer gain extra strength, like how repeated clones will have shorter and shorter DNA code on which to base themselves, or how photocopying copy after copy instead of the original will lead to blurrier copies. While like the Swamp Demon these different bodies show different personalities, it's a more advanced technique because they also show entirely different abilities, and function like multiple demons that happen to share the same basic identity. What gets really interesting is when one of these demons forcefully absorbs the others and grows more powerful.

Demon cannibalism is not an ideal way of gaining strength, but it happens. As mentioned in this post analyzing how demons rely on their human diet, demons at the Final Selection were known to eat each other, but clearly this doesn't make them as formidable as eating humans would, and it may had only been a desperate act to quell their own maddening hunger. However, in cases when demons have challenged each other, the loser may be absorbed. That is precisely what Kokushibou did on two of the three occasions he was challenged for the Upper Moon One rank, according to Fanbook #2 (he decided not to eat Akaza because he liked him). This cannibalism was done with Muzan's permission, and if it's anything like Sekido absorbing the other Hantengu quarters to become Zouhakuten, then we can assume Kokushibou got stronger because of the cells he took from those demons, perhaps similar to how cells from Muzan can make a demon more powerful. While we're on the topic of Upper Moons, Fanbook #2 states that only they have the permission to make other demons, and even so, they must ask Muzan for permission first. I'm assuming they're also the only ones allowed to call Muzan up on the mental telephone line instead of just be on the receiving end. If Muzan agrees, their blood is changed, so essentially what they give the new demon hopeful is not their own blood, but Muzan's. There is only demon we know of who has permission to share his own unique cells, which influence demons in their own unique way, separate from the influence Muzan already has. Lower Moon Five, Rui, simply by virtue of being a favorite. Fanbook #2 tells us:

Although he's only been a demon for less than twenty years, he's especially skilled, and well-favored by Muzan. In terms of absolute abilities he's thought to be more like Lower Moon One or Two, but since he isn't concerned about what number he is he's never applied for change in rank. Muzan anticipated Rui being able to kill Pillars. He probably would had been able to have a good match with a Pillar if he first reabsorbed all the abilities he split up amongst the demons playing the roles of his family (that is, his Blood Techniques which he lent to them by making them drink his blood, which gave them spider appearances), and he probably could had gotten even stronger. However, because he got over-emotional while fighting Tanjiro and the others on Mt. Natagumo, he made some misjudgments. He has a tendency to do simple attacks just throwing his weight around when he gets angry. If Rui were defeated first, his family member demons, who could not originally use Blood Techniques, would lose those abilities.

We can infer a few things from this: --All of those techniques were Rui's in the first place --Rui became weaker by doing this (though his overall strategy in spreading his abilities lead to lots and lots of Demon Slayer Corp deaths, so this is probably part of why Muzan allowed it), so there are limitations in how thinly he can spread himself --If not Rui's personal techniques and instead developed by being in combination with the individual demons' he shared his blood with, that's perhaps part of why he could had gotten more powerful by reabsorbing his own blood/blood techniques. While Rui did have special permission, I think it's also partly because Rui lacked ambition, so he never would had set about to challenge Muzan by spreading his own personal influence. Just think what, say, someone like Gyokko would had done with this permission, and how much he might had abused it in spreading his own taste and influence. Though he's subservient to Muzan, with too much of a taste for power, it's possible he could had tried to overstep his boundaries--not that Muzan would had let that last long the moment he saw it in his thoughts, but keeping tight rules prevents him from ever having to deal with any challenges from among his more powerful demons. If we look at the Rui-Demon Family relationship from the receiving end, though, this is a clear case for how taking cells from other demons can make a demon much stronger, thereby being another option besides eating humans or possible other self-strengthening methods. While they did on the whole become stronger and were newly able to use Blood Techniques with Rui's help, what about other cases of not simply getting stronger, but using each others' techniques as-is? Yahara and Susamaru, perhaps? Not quite, they each used their own Blood Techniques and willingly cooperated with each other, there was no exchange of cells, as far as we know. (That sounds dirty, and we're not going there.) How about when anybody uses Yushirou's papers? First, those abilities were freely lent, and most of the people who used them were human, and there was no ingesting of demon blood required. Perhaps with Nakime, however, forcing his own blood into her may had been how he was able to force her to see illusions. Genya using Kokushibou's techniques? Now we're getting closer. While in his temporary demon state, he was influenced by Kokushibou's cells like Rui's family was influenced by his cells in their appearance. It seems the tree was of his own making instead of being strictly a copy of Kokushibou's techniques, but we can think of this as a crude imitation of the ability to make objects based on demon cells, especially something that requires speedy growth/increase of cells. Later in that fight, Kokushibou displayed the ability to very quickly increase and transform, and the sword which Genya consumed was, essentially, a part of Kokushibou's body. (Still sounding dirty, but nope, we still are not going there.) Very notable is that this is a case of a demon's cells/abilities being absorbed and used against their own will. Even if this did subtract from Kokushibou's abilities like happened with Rui, though, the effect was probably only slight. So then what about when a demon freely wants to lends their own ability to another demon? First of all, Muzan, who will stand for absolutely nothing challenging him, will say no.

Ok. So. What if we can get around that? Answer: Yes, we can. We can totally do this. It's probably just as simple as Rui having other demons drink his blood, and they all probably have some innate ability to influence each other, albeit the more powerful ones having more influence. But, what's super interesting is that their own cells still stay unique to them, even when in another demon's body. Cases in point, Rui's family members periodically changing back to their personal appearance, and Muzan's cells lurking inside of any other demon. And, jumping ahead of ourselves, even when Muzan has absorbed Tamayo, her cells are still so unique that he can even reassemble her. (Worth noting, absorbing one demon probably only had a marginal effect on making him stronger. Also worth noting, at least when inside Muzan's inner space, she's also able to reassemble herself to some extent, and we only see her fade away in peace in a post-chapter sketch once Muzan is dead.)

Speaking of Tamayo, she did freely use a Blood Technique freely given to her by another demon, the man in Asakusa. Once they got him free of Muzan's curse too so he could act on his own will, he could lend the use of his cells and thorny flesh vines to Tamayo, specifically to be used against Muzan in Chapter 138. Muzan's first thought is, "who's Blood Technique is this?" Unsurprising he's long forgotten about the throwaway Asakusa Demon, who has now totally slipped out of his control! But he stays calm, knowing this is like any other demon, and it's not even a huge amount, he can simply absorb this. Which, of course, makes his unwittingly absorb Tamayo's fist, too. Whoops. (Aside: I had initially thought the Blood Technique Muzan uses against Himejima in Chapter 139 was Muzan taking the Asakusa Demon's attack and using it as his own, but Fanbook #2 specifies that this is Muzan's own unique technique.)

Let's back up one more moment. It's one thing to influence each other with your own cells that stay separate and unique, and to lend out Blood Techniques. But what about sharing demon cells in a way that makes it act like like a food, something that can be broken down, totally separated from its former host, and fundamentally transform its new host?

For that, we have medicine.

Yushirou might had been made with Tamayo's cells, or a medicine developed from scratch like the medicine that changed Muzan into a demon, or it could be a combination of both. However, even when Tamayo died, Yushirou could go on living, so he and Tamayo do not have a dependent host/parasite relationship like all the other demons do with Muzan. He certainly felt it with his whole being when he perished, but you could argue that this was the power of love instead of his cells being tied with hers. If her cells were used to create him (which I find likely), being used in a medicinal form severed whatever sort of standard connection there might had been if making demons in Muzan's style, and it also allowed it to fully become a part of Yushirou as an individual, instead of remaining uniquely Tamayo (not that he'd have a problem with that). Getting that process to work took Tamayo over two hundred years. That's probably part of why she could work so much faster with Nezuko's blood, and why she was able to use it as a medicine to help the Asakusa Demon, as stated in Tamayo's letter to Tanjiro in Chapter 127. There's no mention of him picking up traits from Nezuko like Exploding Blood or potential to master the sun, instead, the only effect was helping him break free of Muzan's influence, and perhaps his ability to live on a small amount of blood might also had been influenced by Nezuko's ability to function without it (though I find it more likely Tamayo already had other appetite management methods that helped her and Yushirou which also helped this fellow).

So anyway. While there are demons we don't wish to harm by shedding light on them in a thoughtless metaphor, I hope this was insightful.

#kny fandom theories and meta #or at least trying to keep my own analysis of running themes organized #this is probably just a handy post I want to have around for future reference #Kibutsuji Muzan #Tamayo #Yushiro #Rui #more characters but I am too lazy to tag them all #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer

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cryptidmads · 3 years

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good evening nsr community, i went through the ama from today and came back with an armful or two of lore. there’s a bunch more than last time, and i included bbj as well as the npcs. cozy up, check under the cut, and prepare for a long read. enjoy!

today's ama featured wan hazmer and daim dziauddin again, as well as concept artist ellie and animator ben fong.

BUNK BED JUNCTION (FT. DK WEST)

- mayday and zuke live in the sewers because they're an underground band. it's a pun - there were originally two variations of bbj leaving the sewers - one with mayday hi-fiving gigi (which had a 95% chance of happening), and one with zuke awkwardly fumbling and attempting to hi-five gigi (which had a 5% chance) - one of the inspirations for mayday and zuke were the two main characters of samurai champloo (zuke was jin, mayday was mugen) - someone asked about if the rest of the cast had their own shadow puppets. ben suggested a lemur for mayday, while ellie suggested a zucchini for zuke. she may have been joking. - mayday's guitar solos were done by different people, but zuke's drum solos were all done by bruno valverde. - zuke was the one who implemented the canister thing into mayday's guitar. - someone asked who of the cast are the introverts and who are the extroverts. mayday is an extrovert, zuke is an introvert. - the team does have a bit of lore for mayday and zuke and how they met, but they want to save it in case of a future project. - mayday was inspired by both genevieve from company of thieves and the unbreakable kimmy schmidt. - ben did the animation for mayday swinging the hammer in the workshop. - haz recalls seeing some fanart of mayday being brought up as a rich girl. he doesn't remember the artist, but he does like the idea. - the japanese version has zuke say he has a phd rather than a master's degree. this is apparently a mistake. - the pattern on zuke's pants was inspired by jolyne cujoh and prosciutto from jojo's bizarre adventure. - zuke's toilet seat collection came partially from a story from one of the environmental artists where one of their high school friends pranked another friend with a toilet seat. - zuke does a lot of reading and is naturally inquisitive about things like tech and mechanics. - dk west's shadow puppet abilities might run in the family, and zuke may have it as well. - both zuke and dk west are connected by percussion (zuke with the drums, west with the hand claps) - zuke and west weren't always designed to be related -- west was originally designed as "some guy who comes and goes," but was made into zuke's brother later on in production - dk west is an extrovert.

DJ SUBATOMIC SUPERNOVA

- djss' dj name is obviously a stage name, but the team didn't have a real name for him in the script or anything. - haz joked that his name is bob salad. that's not canon but from what i seen the chat loved it lol - haz brings up the symbolism of djss spinning the planets around himself and how it represents that he thinks of himself as the center of the universe. - ellie helped design the districts, and something she noted about dj's is that it's supposed to look the "slummiest" because he cares more about himself and less about things like blackouts. - dj had some lines cut from his boss fight. those lines? mini lectures towards bbj during every phase. they were cut because the team felt like they were too much for the game, but they want to share them one day. - daim says that dj could be either introverted or extroverted becuase of how much time he spends alone looking at the stars. - dj was never planned to have an approach segment, but funk fiction wasn't told that, so he made him an approach theme anyway. - dodo ice pops are traffic light flavoured, which is a popular ice cream in malaysia. it's strawberry, pineapple, and lime flavored.

SAYU AND THE NERD SQUAD

- three of sayu's creators were based on staff members at metronomik. remi (voiced by ben) was based on one of the programmers and one of the environmental artists (ellie calls him "the lovechild of two dudes"), tila was based on (and voiced by) ellie herself, and dodo was based on danish mak (another environmental artist who also voices him). - sofa wasn't based on anyone in particular, he was more of a "general otaku guy" according to ellie (though haz joked that ellie could just say he was based on him). - dodo is daim's favorite npc -- he also designed him! - sayu was ellie's favorite character to design. she loves drawing mermaids. - the progression in sayu's fight where you go deeper into the "ocean" is supposed to be a metaphor for going deeper into the internet/the deep web. - ellie suggested that if sayu were to have a shadow puppet, it would be a cat. - as for the introvert/extrovert debate, daim says sayu is technically comprised of 4 introverts. sayu herself is the extrovert mask they wear. - sayu's ahoge is a submarine periscope. remi looks through it in one of the cutscenes. - sayu's not a mech. she's remotely controlled by her creators from their computer room. - the backstory between remi and tila is meant to show that artists can come from all sorts of backgrounds.

YINU AND MAMA

- yinu's promotional video was one of the first ones done before they brought in lzbros, so it originally looked different from how it looks in the game now. - yinu's mother's eyes are yellow because she spends most of the fight focusing on yinu (who is mainly yellow). when her eyes go blank white, it represents that she's momentarily forgotten what she loves the most. when her eyes become yellow again after the fight, it means she's remembered yinu and her piano playing. - the way ellie describes natura is that yinu is a plant and her mother is very protective of her, and one of the distinctive features is that there are a lot of domes with plants inside, particularly on the roofs of the houses. - yinu's commercial was not intended to reference little miss fortune. the commercial was shown in 2018, while LMF came out a year later. - yinu's mom turning into a giant tree monster isn't exclusive to her just being angry at bbj. apparently the whole plant thing runs in the yinu family.

1010

- 1010's concept as a boy band had been around since before the team started production, but they were the last to be fully designed -- their designs weren't finalized until way later on. - 1010 were ellie’s least favorite characters to design. she doesn't like drawing guys OR robots. - 1010's early designs had them wearing tuxedos. - 1010 do have memories. - the inspiration for the butt plates came from one of ben's gundam figures from his collection in the metronomik office. thanks ben. - ellie's favorite member of 1010 is purl-hew/blue. - eloni/green is apparently the rapper of the group. - the jingle you hear from the carousel in metro division is a carnival remix of 1010's boss theme. - the numbers underneath 1010's names on the autographs are completely random.

NEON J

- neon j is a dancer. daim explains that in addition to being in the navy, dance has always been his true passion. - in the final phase of 1010's fight, he was originally supposed to control the dance moves of the factory as he was fighting you, but it was cut due to limited resources. - daim designed neon j based on ellie's designs for 1010. - neon j's factory's dance moves were all animated by ben -- no mocap needed. the factory was also his favorite thing to animate. - daim says that "neon j is to tatiana as soundwave is to megatron." basically he is extremely loyal to tatiana. - neon j was one of earliest members of nsr. - neon j seeing 1010 as his sons wasn't planned, but daim loves the concept so much that he could see it being canon. - daim says neon j's brain is "probably" still inside the monitor head. somehow. - neon j is an extrovert. - haz likes the idea of neon j being blind and using his sonar to "see" things. ben joked that the screen worked like giant glasses. - neon j originally had red dots that would pop up on his face when the sonar moved by that were meant to represent acne, and that would've been the reason why he's mostly behind the scenes.

EVE

- in mayday's side of the room when eve splits up bbj, the hands all over the walls are meant to be there to show how eve is angrier at mayday than she is at zuke. - the time signature for the music in mayday's room during the fight is 6/8, whereas in zuke's room it's 4/4. - ellie suggested a platypus shadow puppet for eve. the rest of the team seems to be on board. - eve was ben's least favorite character to animate. he said he struggled with animating her dance moves because it was something he'd never done before, and he still doesn't think he did a good enough job. - eve was born with her split skin tone. - apparently eve's near scrapping had something to do with costs. haz was the one who stopped it from happening. - eve's outfit was partly inspired by beyonce, while her jacket was partly inspired by ariana grande. the team took some inspiration from bjork, as well. - the sleeves on eve's jacket were apparently limbs at one point. - eve is an introvert.

NPCS/OTHER CHARACTERS

- part of tatiana's symbolism is how she used to be a rock star, but her flame/passion slowly burned away, and now she's just a rock, referencing how she was literally on fire as the rock star kul fyra, but now looks burnt out. - daim thinks kliff is older than tatiana, probably over 50. - in addition to the neon j dance lore mentioned above, kayane rambling about neon j after the 1010 fight was supposed to be connected to her watching neon j dance. - ben and haz's favorite npc is mia, and ellie's is dj zam. - dj zam was inspired by one of ellie's college friends, who she says "makes you feel comfortable to be around". - ellie thinks dj zam's neck tattoo says "i love mom". - amal the unicorn was inspired by lady amalthea from the 80's animated film "the last unicorn". he was originally written to be a real talking unicorn, but it was changed partially because his horn wasn't in the right spot on his head. - zed was based on game designer dzaid and has hyperacusis, a hearing disorder that makes it difficult to deal with everyday sounds. - yiruk's name is an anagram of kiryu, the protagonist of the yakuza games. - chef sunshine's design is a homage to julia child. she originally had a bigger physique, but was changed to match lylia's bubbly performance.

#no straight roads #nsr #nsr ama #madison speaks #mayday nsr #zuke nsr #dk west #dj subatomic supernova #nsr sayu #yinu nsr #1010 #neon j #eve nsr

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milstrim · 3 years

Text

Home Is in My Arms

Tony Stark had had a daughter.

Her name had been Penelope.

She had had superpowers.

And he hadn't seen her in four years.

The ten year-old had last been seen on March thirty-first, 2012. The day of the Chitauri invasion. Tony had seen her that morning, and he guessed he could at least be grateful that their last interaction hadn't been like his own with his parents. Instead of a fight that was never resolved, the two had giggled on the couch of the newly furnished tower, him and Pepper with glasses of wine and Penny with her mint milkshake. Pepper had side-eyed them exasperatedly, as though their laughs and jokes had been the worst ruckus anyone had ever made.

And then Coulson. And then Steve. And then Natasha and Bruce and a God he had learned about in history when he was younger. And then Loki and the Helicarrier and explosions that had left Tony's head ringing--but nothing had hurt more than the loss of his friend.

Everything had gone by so quickly, so desperately, there had been no time to do anything about anything except gear up and go. The biggest reassurance he had given himself was that his homework had caused Pepper and Penny to leave the city for a couple of days while the girl was on Spring Break. It meant they were safe from everything was about to happen, and that he didn't have to worry past New York.

And they had won. The Avengers had been formed under desperate circumstances. They had saved the world.

And Penny had been gone.

Pepper had left on the plane, but Penny had managed to convince her godmother that she should stay at her friend's house for a sleepover. The aliens hadn't even been able to make it past the perimeter and into Queens, but the hectic of it had been enough. Or maybe she had run off to help. Even at ten she was braver than he was. Better. And equipped with superpowers from a field trip's rogue spider that made her stronger than even Captain America.

But it hadn't been enough.

No body was ever recovered. No trace of her was ever found. No footage or DNA or witnesses. There was nothing. Nothing for him to even try and grasp onto what had happened to her. How she had died. The best anyone could do was assume that a Chitauri weapon had vaporized her and to try to grieve from there.

And by God did he try.

After the Mandarin and almost losing Pepper, he'd put in more effort than he ever had. He visited the grave where no body was buried, leaving flowers and trinkets and books he knew she would have loved. He talked. To people who had known her like he had. Pepper and Rhodey and Happy and even Natasha.

The two had been so close when the woman had spied on him. Closer than he had been, still trying to change and learn to be a father better than his own after Afghanistan. He'd been dying and hadn't focused on anything but himself. About what he wanted to do before he was gone, instead of what would happen to his family afterwards.

So Tony tried. He tried a lot, but trying didn't always end in success. No, sometimes it ended in helicarriers made for HYDRA to control. Or a robot meant to protect only trying to destroy. Or in the fracturing of the Avengers, with Natasha and Steve on the run while the others sat in a max security prison that he spent every living moment trying to get them out of.

Except for now. Or maybe now too. Tony didn't know why Natasha had texted him. Only that she had betrayed him and texted only a couple of weeks later with a location out in Birmingham, England and nothing else but the message 'Get here quick.'

And he had. With nothing but a quick word to Pepper to keep Ross off of his aching back for a day, he'd stepped onto his plane and arrived in just over six hours. From there the billionaire had stepped into a waiting car and zoomed towards the address the spy had sent him, his heart racing just as fast as the vehicle's as he curved through city traffic.

Tony's thoughts strayed to Steve and Barnes and what had happened the last time he'd zoomed off to help his teammate. He swallowed down on his stuttering fear, reassured partly by the guantlet-watch sat snugly on his wrist and partly because he knew Natasha. Well, he knew her better than he ever had Steve anyway. Him and Natasha had fought, and there'd always been room for disagreements and anger, but at the end of the day they knew each other. And they were family.

The mechanic pulled up outside the run-down apartment complex, giving it a onceover before parking, pulling a baseball cap on low, and stepping out.

There was a drizzle, light and cold for the summer, even in England. He frowned, but only pulled his hood up with a shiver and stepped through the rusted metal gate, allowing him access to the first floor of apartments and a set of spindly stairs that he hoped didn't lead to any kind of locked door. He didn't exactly have a key, and Tony would prefer to not draw any attention to himself while here.

The man didn't need anymore grief from Ross. Not while he was desperate to pin something on Tony, and meeting with a violator of the Accords wouldn't exactly do much for his public image.

Biting on a sigh, Tony headed up the stairs towards the apartment number that Natasha had sent him. Thankfully, there was no locked door in his way, and the only person in the hallway that the stairs had led him to seemed to be much too out of it to pay him any mind. Quicker than he really would have liked, Tony was outside Apartment 9B, the number rusted and close to falling off of its hinges. Sucking in a breath, he knocked.

It only took a few seconds for the door to click! and then crack open just enough for him to catch familiar blue eyes and cropped platinum hair interrupted by a second lock's chain.

Natasha let out a short breath of relief, unlocking the door fully and opening the door just enough that he could slip inside. He glanced around the apartment once as she locked the door back up, surprised to see it was basically exactly what he had expected. It was small and old, orderly but not quite well-kempt, with evidence of past fights staining and fracturing the walls.

"Nice place," he commented. "Very runaway."

"Very last minute," Natasha responded. "It's not as easy as you think it is to get an apartment when everyone's trying to arrest you."

"You seem to slip away no matter what. By the way, how did you get away from Ross last week? I've got to know your trick on that, because I could use some pointers."

Natasha stopped beside him, a small smile tugging at her lips as she crossed her arms over her chest. Despite his forcefully loose and nonchalant posture, Tony felt himself freeze up looking at the Avenger. Her expression, no matter what it was, had always been hard for Tony to discern when she was practically the perfect spy. But now, this smile--it was sad and joyful and regretfully guilty.

"What happened?" he asked, his voice dropping to something softer. Rarely sincere.

Natasha glanced away from him to stare at a door for a moment before glancing back at him. Her lips twitched and her eyes threatened tears in a way that he hadn't thought she would express to him.

She swallowed. "Penny's alive. And I found her."

Tony--

Tony didn't react. Not for nearly a minute. Instead he stared, his entire body stilling--even his damaged heart--before he seemed to come back to life all at once like a broken wound-up toy.

The man stumbled back a step, falling into the nearest gray wall. One lonely breath coming in in a strangled gasp as he willed for something--anything--to make sense.

"She's alive?"

Natasha nodded.

"How?" he demanded. "How--in England? From New York? There's no way anybody could've just taken her while I was--"

The man cut himself off, dragging in another wheeze that rattled through his entire chest. His legs began to collapse under him, but his friend caught him, managing to maneuver him onto the floor slowly. Tony leaned against the wall as Natasha sat beside him, her head propped up against the wall beside him.

Neither said anything. Not for a few minutes at least at Tony's shaking and gasping ebbed. Not until he could force out images and nightmares of Penny his mind had tortured him with for years. He locked them in a box and dropped it in an ocean of useless thoughts, because his daughter was alive. Because she wasn't dead and none of it--a painful death full of fear and confusion while Tony was only blocks away that he had been tortured by for years--had ever happened.

Natasha spoke up when he'd finally managed to take in eight consistent breaths.

"I was raised in the Red Room," she started. "I was taken from my family and tortured for years. I tried to make a family there, and I did. For a little bit at least. But that family was taken too, replaced by the only world I had ever known. One based on pain and dictated structure. A cruel trick to play on a child, but it was normal for the Red Room. What wasn't normal was me not only succeeding more than they had ever dreamed, but succeeding past them. Escaping and deserting. Killing Dreykov was the last step of my defection to SHIELD. It was revenge and justice all at once. The others would be freed and I could clear out my ledger in a life I chose."

She swallowed, taking a moment.

"I failed. I failed and I didn't know." Natasha turned from staring ahead at the wall to stare at Tony. Suffering blue met broken brown, tired and guilty reflecting. In a whisper, she said, "Dreykov lived. He lived until a week ago. And the Red Room, and every Widow in it, lived under him."

Tony was touched to be trusted this much. To be trusted with even a sliver of what his friend had gone through in such a time of suspicion and betrayal. But he was scared. He was terrified, because Natasha never shared just to share. Everything she said had a point, a reason, a direction.

He tore his eyes away, shoving a hand over them and letting his head drop onto his knees. Unwillingly, he croaked, "No... Nat, please don't tell me--"

"Penny's a Widow."

Tony bit his lip, chewing on his cheek so harshly there was the tang of blood in his mouth. He took a moment, letting his head fall against the cracked and stained cement wall. Penny was alive. And she had been trained--no. Natasha's descriptions, however few and miniscule they had been, could not be described as simply training. Penny had been tortured. For four years. And what had he done but grieve and give up? If only he'd known. If only he'd found out sooner.

Natasha continued.

"The Red Room..." She took a breath and licked her lips. "After I escaped, they changed their whole system. Their method. How they hid and how they trained and--and how they controlled the women."

Something about the way Natasha said the last part sent a cold feeling down his throat.

"What did they do to her?" he croaked.

"They um...well, for lack of my understanding of it, they mind controlled her."

"They--Nat what? How would they even--"

"They controlled the brain’s neuropathways through external manipulation," came a new voice, their accent thick. Tony whipped his head around to stare at a woman he had never seen before. Like Natasha, she wore a regular hoodie and sweatpants but still looked as though she could take his life in less than a minute. There was an intensity about her, from her stance to her tied back hair to her ghostly blue eyes that stared at him suspiciously. "It was based off of blueprints for the Winter Soldier. Me and Natasha were part of the mission to retrieve them when we were young."

Despite the insanity of every new piece of information shot his way, he managed to piece it together in his head quickly enough that he opened his mouth to respond with a snapped remark, but Natasha managed to speak before he did.

"What are you doing out here? You're supposed to be looking after Penny."

"I was, but then I heard how badly you were explaining everything and I came to help." Natasha glared. "Relax. I finished braiding her hair and now she's pretending to be asleep so she can listen to everyone talking."

The last part was said with a pointed look down the narrow apartment hall, but everything after Natasha had said "Penny" didn't seem to make sense anymore.

"She's here?" he asked, already scrambling to his feet. He glanced between Natasha and the woman desperately. "Penny's here right now?"

"We found her yesterday," Natasha answered cautiously. "Me and Yelena just started to free the Widows deployed around the world. We managed to give her the antidote during a shootout in Estonia. After that a friend of mine managed to get us here."

"A shoot--is she okay?"

"Just a couple of burns," Yelena said. "She may be enhanced, but she still has plenty to learn. She could still kick your ass, though."

"Thank you. Truly," Tony said, a bite of sarcasm to his voice, before turning back to Natasha, his desperation bubbling. "Which room?"

"Tony, I don't think you need to just go bursting in there. Let me--"

Tony stopped listening, every word his friend was saying dying out on his ears as he spotted a brunette and wide brown eyes poking around the corner over Natasha's shoulder. He felt his breath catch in his throat as their eyes clicked.

Penny had grown. She'd sprouted almost an entire foot from the short ten year old she had been, awkward and gangly limbs that the girl had always seemed to struggle with were replaced by obvious muscle and carefully controlled movement as she stepped out from behind the wall, their stare still holding. Despite the sharper angle of her chin and jaw, she still held baby fat in her cheeks that dwindled the look of her down by a couple of years, not helped at all by the familiar roundness of her deeply brown eyes.

He swallowed. His voice broke.

"Penny?"

—-

“Penny?"

It had been years since Penny had seen her dad. Since she'd heard him. Anything about her father not privy to missions had been carefully shielded away from the teenager for years. Sometimes on the few missions she had been sent on she would catch news clippings and pictures on TV channels before she had to move on or that terrible voice in her mind would force her to ignore him. But, despite the scarcity of which she was allowed to know about her father, she had always thought about him.

Penny had swam in her memories whenever she could. Whenever she needed. She'd think about the games she and her dad had used to play. About lessons he'd taught her and days they'd spent together. About hugs and braided hair and kisses to her head. The memories had felt faint and washed away underneath everything, but she'd clung to them like a lifeline.

That being said, she hadn't expected Dad's voice to sound like that. For him to look like this. He was always so put together in her mind--so strong--even when he was messy from the lab or tired from a long day of work, always accompanied by fond child-like adoration. But now he didn't look it.

There were bruises on his face, faint but still noticeably purple. His hair wasn't as dark or thick as she remembered, growing back just a little higher on his hairline, and more lines grabbed and pulled at his face. But that wasn't what ruined her memory of strength and warmth, people aged after all, that was just reality. It was the expression on his face and glossing over his eyes. It was the way he'd said her name, so unsure and weary.

Penny, finally, looked away from Dad, instead glancing over at Yelena and trying not to look like she was too desperate for help. Yelena stared back, raising her brows and gesturing to Tony with a slight nod of her head, as if telling her to not be a coward. But Penny didn't know how to do that. Not now.

Thankfully, Natasha took over.

"I'm going to go get us some dinner. Yelena?"

Okay, so not the kind of help she'd been looking for.

Yelena gave Penny one last glance, nodded, and then followed the Avenger out of the door.

The door clicked shut and then it was just father and daughter.

"Penny," he tried again.

She hid a flinch at how small and tired his voice was, how broken he felt standing only feet from her. She hid her shock and her fear and apprehension exactly how she'd been taught, schooling her features into something easy and bored. She let her shoulders drop and her posture loosen, but the hardest part was hardening her stare. That had always been the biggest complaint of her handlers. Her senses had been sharp but her expression always so readable by her eyes.

"Hi, Dad," she said, her voice cool and casual on default. The words felt terrible leaving her lips, so she crossed her arms in an attempt to feel more stable. "It's been a while."

He chuckled, short and sad. "Yeah. You could say that."

And then there was silence. It trickled in, slow, awkward, and tense between them. Penny tried not to let it get to her, but she couldn't deny that she wasn't tired and disappointed. When Yelena had smashed the antidote beside her, it was the first time the teenager had seen clearly in a long time, and her first thought had been of her Dad. There had been worries about if he missed her and if he'd been okay, but a fear had stabbed at her so strongly that she was still thinking about it.

Would he still love her? After all she'd done? She had hurt people. She had killed people. Not in defense. Not in good reason. But in fear and control.

"I, uh..." Penny blinked at her dad's voice, beating away her thoughts and instead focusing back on the bruised and stuttering man in front of her. "Sorry. I would've thought of something better to say if I'd known I was going to see you again. Maybe some presents too. Do you still like those peanut butter cookies?"

"The ones we used to make?" she asked. "With the Hershey Kisses?"

"Those are the ones."

She shrugged. "I don't know. I haven't had them since I was with you."

"Oh. Yeah. I guess you wouldn't have..." he trailed off, glancing down for a moment. She stared at him, watching his expression carefully as he loosened and looked back up at her. "Well, we can't make them again? At home?"

"Sure. Sounds fun."

Penny couldn't stand how dull her voice sounds, like she couldn't care less about something that really made her want to cry in happiness. But...she didn't know what else to do. What to say. The Red Room had made sure she always knew what to do and what to say, but that had been for politicians and businessmen and people she was supposed to trick. She didn't want to trick her dad. She just--she wanted to--

Dad stepped closer, brows furrowed and mouth pulled down in a deep and concerned frown. She kept a wary eye on him as he approached, trying to force down feelings of apprehension and fear that she had become familiar with whenever anybody was in her space. But he stopped about a foot short, his reached out hand halting just away from her face as he whispered, "Oh, piccolina. It's okay." His voice broke. "It's okay. I'm gonna make sure it is... I promise."

And finally she broke.

And it hurt. It really, really hurt.

Penny leaned her cheek into his open hand as hot beads of tears caught on her eyelashes, allowing for Dad to cup his other hand around the back of her head and tentatively pull her in. It took the teenager a moment to adjust, so wired on the need to fight and never let her guard down, but then she just--crumpled.

Like a switch had been flicked, Penny buried her nose into his neck and wrapped her arms around him in a tight squeeze, swallowing down tears. Dad pulled her in tighter, his nose pressed into her tightly braided crown.

And then he sobbed.

It was a strangled, inhuman kind of sound that rumbled from his chest to escape the back of his throat. He cleared his throat, as if embarrassed, but Penny wasn't an idiot. She could still hear his heart thumping and feel a tear slip from his chin onto the back of her neck. It all shocked her, but the sound found itself ringing in her ears painfully more than anything.

She flinched in his hug.

"Oh, Penny. I'm so sorry," he apologized, his voice sore with tears. "So, so sorry."

"For what?" she asked. "Not finding me? You wouldn't have been able to, Dad, even being you. Draykov made sure of it."

"I don't care. I should've done something! I should've--I should've--"

"Dad." He fell silent as she pulled away from him, crossing her arms back over her chest as she came back to her training. Dad stared at her, his dark copper eyes as guilty as she felt. "Please, just... Don't be sorry. Because I'm sorry, and if you're sorry then we're both sorry and we can't both be sorry it's--"

"What on Earth do you have to be sorry for?"

"You'd be surprised."

"Penny--"

"I'm not ten anymore, Dad. I don't think I'm even a kid anymore... I've--I've done too much harm. I have a lot to be sorry for."

Dad stared at her, a familiar sadness in his eyes. He chewed his cheek, brows furrowed in thought, and she was brought back to a time when she would watch him solve problems in the lab, or try to answer one of her inane questions that she never seemed to be able to stop asking.

"Let me ask you something," he started. "Do you think I'm a bad person? That I'm at fault for losing you?"

"No," she answered immediately, because her dad had always tried, no matter what. She'd known he wasn't perfect, and that a lot of people hated him for the mistakes he'd made, but she'd always known how much he really cared. How much he really cared and tried for the world. For the Avengers. For her.

"Well, then what makes you a bad person? What makes you not a kid anymore?"

Penny could only stare. She could only answer, "I've hurt people."

"I know. And I have too. But you don't think I'm a bad person, so you're not a bad person either. And what about Nat? Or your new very scary friend?"

"I forgot how much I hated arguing with you," she deadpanned.

"'Trying' to argue with me," he corrected, a smile pulling at his face. Surprisingly, she managed to smile back. Even more surprisingly, it didn't feel fake. Sure, it was small and tired, but Penny couldn't remember the last time she'd actually smiled. "See? Everything's going to be okay."

"How do you know?" she asked. "I'm a violator of the Accords. If it ever gets out that I was part of the Red Room--what I did for the Red Room--almost nothing could keep me out of prison. You'll have to explain how you found me and it would make you a violator--"

"I'll handle it," Dad said. "I always handle it. And just because you don't feel like a kid doesn't mean you aren't one. There are protections for you. And we found protections for Nat. Wanda too, if she would've taken them." He muttered the last part under his breath, the words emotionless but regret and guilt clear in his eyes. He cleared his throat and looked back at her with a raised brow. "And how do you know about the Accords? Do they have a current events class in the Red Room?"

"We do actually have to keep up with some events for missions. But, no. I've been reading old newspapers. Did you know you were on the front page for almost two weeks in June?"

"No. Nobody reads the paper anymore. Unless you're a dinosaur anyway."

"Uncle Rhodey likes the paper," she said with that still small but still real smile. "For the crossword puzzles."

"Yeah. Like I said: Dinosaur." With that, the jokes seemed to slide away as he took on a more serious tone. "But I'll handle it. I've already been trying to handle the Accords. You'll be safe, and free, at home, Penny. I promise."

"I can really come home?"

Dad paused. "Did you think you wouldn't?"

Penny shrugged. "I don't know. I wanted to. I want to. But I just... I didn't know how safe it would be, and I know how to live by myself. How to avoid suspicion. I was...I was prepared for other options."

"If you were planning on running, why did you meet with me?"

"I don't know," she said. But truthfully, there had been a hole in her heart. A knot in her stomach. She'd just--she'd needed to see her dad. To apologize and let him know she was okay. She'd missed her family for so long, she had to imagine they'd missed her too. In fact, Penny had wanted nothing more to know they'd missed her. That those years in the Red Room wondering where her family was hadn't been because they didn't care.

Realistically, Penny knew Dad had missed her. Had loved her enough to grieve and look for her, but being there for so long--so terribly long--had been enough for seeds of doubt to sprout and root itself in her mind. But the teenager didn't tell her dad that. That would make him upset, and Penny was tired of being upset. Instead, she said, "Just missed you. Wanted to know that you're okay."

"Well, now you're gonna know every day," he said. "And you're going to know that Pepper is okay. And Rhodey and Happy. And you're never going to miss us again."

"Never?"

"Nope. Well, maybe when you go to school. But we can homeschool if you would prefer that. Would you?"

"Oh, uh, I don't--"

"Yeah, never mind. You don't have to know right now," he said with a wave. Then he smiled at her again, that genuine smile that squinted his eyes and pulled at his wrinkled laugh lines. "Right now, why don't we just go home?"

"Yeah," she said. And suddenly no other thought occupied her mind. Home was all she could think of. Of tall New York skyscrapers and the bustling city. Or maybe they'd go back to Malibu, even if his house was gone. Either way she'd see her uncle again. And Pepper. And Happy, who were all family to her. Family she hadn't seen in so long. "Let's go home."

Dad smiled, his eyes misty. Penny smiled back, taking his hand and leaning against him in another hug. He readily accepted, wrapping his arms around her and pressing a light kiss to the crown of her head.

The best part: Nothing about him whispered danger. Or discomfort or uneasiness. There was just...comfort.

Just home.

It was the best feeling in the entire world.

—-

“Should we tell Uncle Rhodey we're on the way?"

"Nah. He loves surprises."

"He hates surprises."

"Exactly!"

Penny laughed. And the sound, the feeling, was just like home.

#peter parker #tony stark #female peter parker #irondad #irondad and spiderson #iron man fanfiction #spiderman fanfiction #marvel fanfiction

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awindylife-writes · 3 years

Text

Voyage of the Damned Part 2

Relationships: the Doctor x reader, Astrid x reader (platonic), Astrid x Doctor (platonic)

Summary: Voyage of the Damned rewrite. The Doctor and you find yourselves on the Titanic, space edition. You meet Astrid and get ready for a wonderful day, but then a meteor shower hits the ship and it starts falling towards Earth.

Author's notes: There was a number of things l didn't like about this Christmas special so again, l rewrote it.

Warnings: a ship crashes, multiple mentions of dearth bc a lot of people die

"Oi, Steward! I'm telling you, the shields are down!" a new man yelled.

"LISTEN TO HIM! LISTEN TO HIM!" the Doctor desparately screamed in the Steward's face. The two crewmen let him go and you didn't know it, but it was too late.

A moment later the ship started rocking like it was being torn apart, because it was. You lost your footing and fell back as everything turned sideways.

"Y/N!!!!" you heard the Doctor's terrified scream through the noise of the ship's destruction and the cries of other passengers. You couldn't even get a good look at where he was before something in the walls exploded and you threw yourself away.

You found Astrid near you and thank god for that. "I've got you!" you yelled over the noise and gripped her tight as you tried to shield her from the hell around you.

Then there were arms around you too, holding you up and protecting you. You knew those arms.

The Doctor had found you and the three of you clung to each other in that madness. You could feel each shudder of the ship like a wave of an earthquake. You tried to keep yourself steady and upright but you were the snow in a snowglobe someone was shaking. Balance was a mith and everything was being ripped apart. Various pieces of equipment were falling on all sides, there was fire burning all around you; you could feel its heat on your skin and you breathed its smoke. You felt sick from being thrown around but you were too terrified to hurl.

You couldn't close your eyes even though you wanted to. Everything in you was screaming to watch out for danger, but there was so much of it around you you didn't know where to look. You stared at disaster over Astrid's shoulder and the Doctor's arm. Shadow and light mixed into a disorienting mess and the shades the fire threw joined the dance. You coudn't distinguish what was near and what was far but you still looked.

The only thing you could do was clutch Astrid and the Doctor with all the strength you possessed and wish they wouldn't be harmed.

Finally you were thrown to the side in one last bang and then it stopped. You were lying on the floor and partly on the Doctor. He was on his back, still holding you and Astrid.

After a breath he let go, then stood up and swiftly looked around. You sat up, thankful you were still in one piece. You let go of Astrid enough to check her over and relief washed over you when you found out she was unharmed. You were about to yell if everyone was okay but the Doctor sushed you. After a moment of absolute silence he quetly declared, "It's stopping."

He then looked down at you in worry and offered you a hand. "You alright?"

As you quietly nodded, he looked over at your friend. "Astrid?"

She nodded too and took the hand he'd offered her. He pulled both of you to your feet.

"Bad name for a ship," he told you, scowling. "Either that, or this suit is really unlucky."

"We'll get you a new one and then we'll test that theory," you smiled weakly at him.

He looked at you, grateful, and then you heard Astrid suck in a breath.

The three of you looked down at the unlucky officer who was on the ground close to you. The Doctor kneeled to check him over. You saw him shake his head at the Steward and your stomack turned to stone.

The Steward was dead now too. You looked out the door with the Doctor, at the wreckage and the distant Earth. Still beautiful, you thought to yourself. You were a bit dazed, nothing felt real and everything was too real at the same time.

You knew you never wanted to feel so powerless again, but you also knew that drive was in you still. You would help where you could.

You gathered yourself and asked, "What happened?"

"How come the shields were down?" Astrid demanded a second later. You jumped, you hadn't noticed her there. She smiled gently at you, blue eyes kind, and caressed your shoulder. You managed a small, grateful smile in return.

"I don't think it was an accident," the Doctor growled. You figured that.

"How many dead?" Astrid and you asked in one voice, both looking at the Steward's body out in space. She was indignant though, while you were simply sad.

"We're alive," the Doctor answered her and then looked at you. "Focus on that," he told you gently. He knew what people being hurt did to you.

"I'll get you out of here," his voice was soft but firm. Then he turned to Astrid and you followed his eyes. She was trembling, still looking out at the result of the hell you all had endured. You took her hand into yours and squeezed it.

"I will get you both out of here," the Doctor assured her. "Astrid, l promise. Look at me." He held her shoulders and when she found his eyes, he assured her again, "I promise."

You were glad, because when the Doctor promised something, it happened. You needed her to live. Even if she'd want nothing to do with you after this, you needed her to live. Even if she had been anyone else, you would have done your damnest to ensure she survived, but Astrid was extraordinary. To think about the universe without her?

No. No.

After she nodded shakily, he concluded, "Good," and turned around. He went on about reception but you tuned him out. Instead, you looked Astrid in the eye and then pulled her closer. She gratefully accepted the hug.

"You heard what the Doctor said and l'll say it too. I promise we'll get you out of here." You squeezed her shoulder in emphasis.

She breathed deeply and slowly let go. Then she smiled and her bright eyes crincled. "Thank you," she told you gratefully. You nodded and swung your still joined hands.

"You know, l met you about two hours ago, but now l think l've known you for years," she said in wonder.

"Yeah?" you asked her and she nodded, still smiling. "I feel that way too," you told her, giddy in this moment. You both grinned at each other.

"Oh," the Doctor's sad voice cut through.

You whirled around. "What is it what's wrong?"

"That's the TARDIS over there," he told you and you desparately searched for the blue box with your eyes. He was right, it was spinning in zero gravity, so close but still out of your reach.

"What is that?" Astrid asked in confusion.

"It's our ship," you told her, throat tight. "It's our home."

"And it's programmed to lock onto the nearest centre of gravity, and that would be the Earth."

You took care of the other passengers with Astrid as the Doctor talked to the bridge. You overheard enough to know the picture.

"Are we going to die?" Foon asked and everything started going downhill.

The Doctor sushed the frightened passengers. "First things first," he began in a determined voice. "One, we're gonna climb through this ship. B, no, two, we're gonna reach the bridge. Three, or c, we're gonna save the Titanic. And, coming in a very low four, or d, or that little iv in brackets they use in footnotes, follow me."

Good, that was good, you thought to yourself. Always good to establish a goal.

"Hang on a minute." The fricking billionare decided to show he's an ass. "Who put you in charge?" he demanded. "And who the hell are you anyway."

"I'm the Doctor. I'm a Time Lord." Sparks flew behind him and he was suddenly bigger than everyone in the hall.

"I'm from the planet Gallifrey in the constellation of Casterbourus." You were grinning like mad. You could almost hear magestic music playing.

"I'm nine hundred and three years old, and l'm the man who's gonna save your lives and all six billion people on the planet below. And she's gonna help," he interjected, looking at you. "Have you got a problem with that?" he asked the billionare.

"No," the man admitted, baffled.

The Doctor turned to you. "In that case..."

"Allons-y," you said for him with a smile and started walking. You turned back, grinning at the group as the Doctor fell into step with you. You found Astrid with your eyes and nodded your head for her to join you.

"This whole thing could come crashing down any minute!" the billionare whined as he helped you clear the staircase of debris.

"Oh, Brixton, did you get that message?" you asked him sweetly.

He frowned in confusion. "No, what message?"

"Shut up," you told him, not covering up your annoyance.

Then you heard from above, "Bannacafalata, made it!"

You climbed up behind Astrid. You weren't about to leave her alone on this bloody ship.

Foon's screams echoed in the chasm. Death, death, all around you death, whywhywhywhy WHY?!?!

"Alright, when it's ready, that blue light comes on there," the Doctor pointed at the spot on the battery Bannacafalata had given you. Another person you hadn't been able to save.

Astrid frowned. "You're talking as if you two aren't coming with us."

"There's something down on deck thirty-one," you told her, "and we're gonna find out what it is."

"But what if you meet a Host?" She was worried about you and the thought melted your heart.

"Well, then we'll just..." The Doctor wiggled his eyebrows at you, smiling, "have some fun."

"Sounds like you two do this kinda thing all the time," Astrid added nonchalantly.

"Not by choice," you assured her, voice soft.

"Yeah, all we do is travel," the Doctor pitched in.

"Imagine it," you told her, suddenly wishing with all your heart you were out there, with her in the stars. "No stakes, no bills, no boss. Just the open sky." The wonder you felt when you thought about all you've seen seeped into your voice. There was all that space out there, so much room to wonder, so many skies to see.

"I'm sort of, uh, unemployed? Um, now," she answered as you looked at her expectantly. "I was thinking that blue box is, kinda small," she raised her eyebrows, "but l could... squeeze in? Like a stowaway!" Her eyes were so full of hope and your heart was bursting.

"It's not always safe," the Doctor's voice cut through the feeling. And you remembered. You remembered Foon and Morvin and Bannacafalata. How could you have forgotten???

"So you two need someone to take care of you," she protested. "I've got no one back on Stoe, no family. Just... me." She looked at you, blue eyes pleading. "So what do you think? Can l come with you?"

The Doctor smiled and looked at you. You were already grinning and nodding at Astrid, so incredibly happy. It was decided. "Yeah, we'd like that," the Doctor answered while you nodded on enthusiastically.

Her lips stretched into a wide grin and you pulled her close. You hugged her tightly, with a bright future ahead of you.

And then all three of you fell to the ground as the room shook.

"All charged up!" the Doctor yelled as the blue light came on. You all hurried back to the two waiting men. "Mister Copper, look after her; Astrid, look after him." He pointed at them. "Brixton, um..." he trailed off at a loss for words. "Look after yourself," he finally finished.

"We'll see you again," you reassured Astrid. "I promise." You steadily held her gaze so she knew you meant it.

And then you were off, running to the door on the other side of the hall.

"Hold on!" she called after you. "There's an old tradition on Stoe!"

"We've really got to go," the Doctor told her and you swatted his arm.

"Just wait a minute!" she yelled as she ran up to you.

She stopped in front of you, cradled your face and deftly kissed your cheek. "You'll get the other when you come back," she told you, smiling, then turned to the Doctor and did the same.

"See you later!" she called after you when you turned to leave.

"Not if l see you first!" you told her over your shoulder, a huge grin splitting your face.

"What she said," the Doctor joined in.

After seeing Astrid smile in turn, you were gone.

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